#they're at least more enjoyable when you're with people where you can make jokes

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Ok so now that I've spent some time thinking about the whole "Chuuya was never a vampire" twist, I... still don't like it. For many reasons.

Here's my explanation; if you want to read it, please do. I strive to be fair. I want to wait for the manga release before making a verdict on whether it's bad writing or not, and I also want to see the start of next arc to see where they're going with all this.

If you don't want to read it, and you're having fun with the twist (it is funny. I will admit that much), then skip this and keep having fun! I don't want to ruin anyone's enjoyment.

First of all. It makes no sense. There are things that just do not add up. There was never an indication this was a possibility.

Bro. Did you put on costume makeup for the texture under your eyes? Did it wash off after nearly getting drowned and you had to frantically reapply it behind Fyodor's back and that's why we couldn't see your face for several chapters. Did you take it off again for your dramatic reveal here at the end? I demand smeared undereye makeup Chuuya in the manga when it releases hbfsdjhbfv

Ok this was more a joke. But here's what really irks me.

From what I can recall, this is. True. He needs to have made contact to manipulate gravity. It's also re-established in this very arc.

Great. So how the fuck did he slow the elevator? He was with Fyodor in a separate room! This makes no sense. Did he leave to stop the elevator and Fyodor was like "oh chill. ok come back soon"??? What?!

Here's another thing I want to address:

@ticklinglady I had this same question. However, on thinking on it again, I do have an answer that makes sense - they had to buy time for Sigma to use his ability on Fyodor, to gain knowledge on him about what he knows, and what his ability is. <-I feel confident in saying this is going to be important later. Sigma will still have a role to play and we will find out more about Fyodor!

Alright. Moving on to the themes, and why this also doesn't work (at least for me).

The theme in this arc is very much to do with the contrast between trust vs control. This is Fyodor's failing when it came to Dazai, and it is established very early on as the major contrast between them, in the Sky Casino arc. The vampires, though it seemed silly and random, fit nicely into that theming. And the conclusion, where Dazai showed extreme faith in Sigma and the Agency members (and what an interesting contrast that is; to have someone show faith in ordinary humans when his foil is a man who has faith in god but not humanity), that fits into that theming also. Ok, so this was an extension of that right? Showing faith in Chuuya, as always.

Yeah, no. I want to direct your attention back to this here.

This line is the one that had everyone going "oh man skk is going to fuck you up for that". I made an entire analysis back when this chapter first came out about the themes that we saw, and Fyodor's utter devaluing of the effectiveness of people beyond just their skills and abilities (it's here, if you're curious). This is why I suspected that, since Dazai and Fyodor are intellectually matched, it would have to be Sigma and Chuuya to catch Fyodor off guard - because he only values what people can do, not who they are.

Well, we got a little with Sigma, before Fyodor took control of the situation again. (Rip buddy.) Sigma's tenacity and unwillingness to fall for Fyodor's manipulating him away from helping the Agency was based off his personal choice and free will. He managed to shoot him! Fyodor was reduced to a cheap trick to get close enough to stab him! There was a certain level of payoff.

But Chuuya? I want you to think for a second. What did he actually do? Not a single part of this was Chuuya's idea. It was Mori's - he was at the very least sent undercover under orders, if not sent to Meursault under orders. He didn't even glue his own fangs in apparently. Now let's go over what he did. Why was it so necessary that it be Chuuya there? Well, obviously because gravity manipulation was needed to slow the elevator and the bullet. Oh... hm. So. His ability. Was what was needed, huh?

But it was necessary for it to be Chuuya because of the bond between him and Dazai, right? Oh. Wait. So, Chuuya's personality and goals don't matter - only his ability to read Dazai.

This twist makes it so Chuuya as a person doesn't actually throw a wrench into Fyodor's plans at all. All that matters is that he is Mori's executive and Dazai's partner. I guess he was "utilized" after all. I thought, with his characterization in Fifteen and Stormbringer, that we were moving away from this characterization of Chuuya only by his bond with Dazai. Do you want to scream.

You might be saying, okay, but at the very least it showed the depths of Double Black's bond! ...did it? Not really, at least not to me. The only impressive part of any of this was Mori's preparedness. This was barely an skk plan. It was a Mori plan. Double Black placing their lives in each other's hands is a Tuesday for them. This is nothing we didn't already know. And truthfully, it goes nowhere near the level of sheer trust we saw in Dead Apple. Mori sent Chuuya in sure, but it was only after everything settled down that he realized that Mori suspected Dazai would need help. Before that point, it seemed everyone thought Dazai was dead except Chuuya. Chuuya chose to jump out of that plane. Chuuya chose to risk his life. It showcased his personality, his free agency, and the level of trust they had far, far better. And it was emotionally satisfying! Dazai was extremely grateful that his trust paid off! Chuuya was somewhat conscious during Corruption, enough to weaken his own punch and shout Dazai's name! Dazai prevented Chuuya from having his ability be separated from him by the fog! They are an unbeatable team... but they were still left exhausted, and had to rely only on each other. How does what happened in this latest episode compare to that in a way that makes me believe they've actually outmaneuvered Fyodor?

Listen. I'll take twists that don't really have a great build up if they further the themes or character development, or it just makes for good drama. There's an interesting pay off, at least, so I say "okay, okay. Could've been done better, but I'll let it slide for the intrigue." But here? Nothing. It was boring. Are you bored.

Anime watchers were probably more fine with it. Maybe it was a little disappointing, but oh well. But manga readers have been having this plot dragged out for years. A lot of said fans (including myself) were excited to see Chuuya become main series relevant and receive present day development - and it seemed like we were going to get that with the recent publication of not one, but two Chuuya backstory novels, and the drama of this arc pitting Dazai and Chuuya against each other. Instead, this did absolutely nothing of interest for his character. Why was he even here?

Which brings me to the last point, which is the characterization.

Going back and re-reading this entire arc now, it becomes one big stage performance. Ok, fine, it's a little funny. But now there's hardly anything of value to these interactions. The only ones that actually matter are Fyodor and Sigma, and Fyodor and Nikolai. All that buildup to drama between Double Black, to another incredible display of trust, to something shifting and changing from the status quo... all that build up, and nothing has changed for Chuuya, or for Double Black. The show of trust wasn't even that dramatic really. Are you bored still.

This also weakens Fyodor's character to me. Fyodor witnessed their incredible show of trust in Dead Apple. I assumed he was prepared for skk-typical bullshittery, you know, being a genius on par if not greater than Dazai. You're telling me he was so overconfident he completely missed that Chuuya wasn't a vampire? Really? Fyodor really had nothing in place that would verify whether the vampires were actually under control? He wasn't constantly checking for a plan? It really was just red eyes and fangs, and he thought that was fine? That's it? Ok.

Truthfully, I was kind of :| about several of the preceding twists in the Meursault arc, particularly the dagger Fyodor pulled out when he started acting to Sigma, and the door railing being preemptively crushed by Chuuya before the drowning started. The dagger was actually ornate in the manga, which raised several questions - it couldn't have come from a guard. It made me think there was more to that interaction than just Fyodor pretends to have a split personality and that there was actually something to that knife. Well, it was made to be a regular knife in the anime, so I guess theorizing across those lines are dashed.

What bothered me the most though was the crumpling of the rail to stop the door from completely closing. There was no indication of this in the manga. None. No one could've predicted that - because it's stupid. The water filled so fast it couldn't get out of the crack in the door, even though it was huge??? Dazai was in the control room - you're telling me that there was no security camera focused on the door??? You know, where you would position a security camera??? It was dumb to me, but I was willing to roll my eyes and move on because I was expecting a good payoff to all this, and well, it was funny.

But now, the whole arc is one extended joke skk were playing on Fyodor. And you're telling me that's how our major antagonist goes out? Our major antagonist of several arcs? Be for fucking real.

And depending on when Dazai figured it out, it may even cheapen earlier scenes. If he found out after the elevator slowed like people have been theorizing, I could accept that. That's fine. But I need people to recall: in the actual episode he states "it was all an act".

Is Dazai probably lying to save face? Sure. But as of this moment we actually have no evidence it wasn't an act from the beginning. Remember that Ango was communicating the whole time with Dazai. Remember that Mori was involved and helped Tanizaki and Kenji get to safety. It's entirely possible it was all premeditated.

One last suggestion: the plan name was "Good-bye" as suggested earlier. This means that even if Dazai didn't know from the beginning, he knew by the time of his speech to Chuuya as he was drowning.

This means that his whole scheme with Sigma was not an extremely dangerous, life-risking play on his part at all (@daz4i has gone to explain why this sacrificialism isn't good for a suicidal character, which I recommend reading, but nonetheless it was still notable characterization for Dazai). And what about this?

Even his own flashbacks and memories were, what? A lie? A performance? For whom? Not for Fyodor, that's for sure.

For us. The readers. For the people who are invested in these two and their dynamic. For the people who wanted development between them, because there are actually issues there that have not been resolved. People wanted Dazai to show real concern. Chuuya is still bitter, even if Dazai thinks everything is fine and the same since he left. There was a tease that we're going to get how Chuuya felt when Dazai left the Mafia at some point in the future. People were making angsty art and writing and getting really excited because all the prior interactions had appeared to be set up for the payoff of this drama.

We get an introduction in the dungeon. We reveal their partnership and fearsome reputation during the Lovecraft fight. They perform flawlessly in Dead Apple. Throughout all this, they need no communication. They read each other and respond in tandem, always... but there's still an underlying tension in the way they do not talk to each other. I, and many others, had thought the prison escape arc was the breaking point for some development, since their prior appearances were all meant to establish them as a team, and this arc dealt heavily with the breaking of established things.

But no. Deus ex skk is perfect. They have no issues or flaws. Do you want to scream again.

Anyways. I recognize I'm probably just very disappointed right now and by tomorrow, I probably won't care anymore and will just roll with it. I think I was extra disappointed because while I tempered my expectations for, say, Yosano and Kyouka's involvement (sigh...), I fully expected skk would be handled well, being the fandom faves and where the money is at, so I guess I took the disappointment that much harder.

However, I'm eager to see how the manga tackles the ending, and if we will get any extra cues or better pacing there that may make me not quite so bitter. If it's any consolation, I do think we'll be getting Chuuya focus at some point in a future arc, and while I do think Fyodor is dead, I doubt he will have stopped haunting the narrative. He'll be back in some capacity. I'm pretty certain he's still the mastermind.

And I'm curious about the next arc and what's happening there. Maybe some things will be revealed later that will help smooth out the flaws here.

[dearweirdme]

Just a heads up, I'm a Jikooker, but I come in peace ✌️

I really like your blog because of how grounded and respectful you are of bts members. I feel like only reading Jikook bloggers opinions kinda traps me in an echo chamber, so it's really nice to question my interpretation of Jikook interactions with different perspectives (sometimes we gotta admit we're being delulu kkkk). Your blog is perfect for that 'cause you're very chill and bring very interesting points, so you quickly became my fav taekook blog. I'm sorry for all the jikookers who come here to make a fuss.

To clarify what I mean when I call myself a Jikooker, I believe Jungkook and Jimin have a very special bond, be it platonic or romantic, they are best friends and care deeply for each other. They're the only duo that actually makes me raise some eyebrows, however, at the end of the day, I don't know these people so what do I know? ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ No matter who they're dating I'll always be happy for them and cheer them on.

Anyways, the reason why I'm here is 'cause I love Taekook's relationship and I wanna gush about it lol.

One thing that I noticed that's very sweet is that JK is very sensitive to how Tae is feeling, so you can frequently see, for example, Jimin not realizing when a joke hurt or annoyed Tae and JK coming in to defend and praise him. (Of course Jimin is very sweet as well, he has comforted Tae through his hardest times, he's just not good at reading Tae unless he expresses his feelings out loud)

That's why I think Taekook became closer than Vmin over the years. Now, I don't think Vmin is as close as they used to be because they don't understand each other well, but the way they hugged during Jin's military discharge made me remember that despite their distance, Vmin has a soft spot for each other. You know those friends who go months without talking but when a hard time comes, they're the first ones to be there for each other and vent out their feelings? I feel like that's Vmin.

Meanwhile, Taekook seems to understand each other very well. I'm not sure if it's cause they both show signs of possibly being nd, but Taekook just has a natural understanding of what the other means. You always see Jungkook and especially Tae, say things that shock and confuse the other members, but when you look at Taekook they frequently don't even realize the other said something "weird".

Ever since their talk in ITS, it's like Taekook became closer than ever. They bring up each other any time they can in interviews and lives, they hang out all the time and we got so many adorable photos of them together. I see a lot of people saying their interactions are awkward and they seem distant, but I think they're just not the most talkative people in general and are perfectly comfortable with silence, both of them are the type of people to let other people talk more and just respond once in a while. I think Taekook communicate through actions rather than words.

The only time I saw their interaction as awkward was that Livestream in 2020 where they were making those flowers(?)(I don't remember...) but even then I think it was more about their difficulty with conducting live streams than their relationship.

That's it. I hope I wasn't an annoying jikooker

Borahae~ 💜

Hi @moo-mood !

Thanks for your kind ask. Obviously there’s things you and I will not agree on (I’ll not get into it, you know what those things are, I know what those things are, everyone does) but since vminkook-love-each-other is the biggest hill I will die on.. I’m always happy to see that this is something we can at least agree on and find enjoyment in 😊. I’m very much sure Jk, Jm, and Tae hate to read some of the stuff that goes around about them, so to see people acknowledge their closeness is really nice.

[bleedchan]

my steam review for ButtKnight, an anime porno game that just had a demo released.

it's called: a way to not have to see the men too much? lol

jesus, straight westerners are the worst. they're so scared of seeming gay that even when they can draw hot anime girls, they make the guys look absolutely disgusting, like, as a joke or something.

i really like how the girls look. i wishlisted this game because of it, despite having my brother on my steam, lol. and yet when i started it up and was greeted with ButtKnight on the splash screen and his chin looks like a butt and the throne armrests look like butts i just went like, "uch," instinctively. like, i couldn't stop myself.

i'm sure a bunch of people *like* the sense of humor this game – it's called ButtKnight, after all! and even if you skip the story, you're presented with a tedious unskippable tutorial that spoonfeeds you the advanced gameplay concepts of a shmup with a shoot button, a slash button, and a bomb button – but is mostly an excuse to force you to experience the borderlands-tier western indie game dev humor. oh hehe ButtKnight fell over and you see his butt now!

it's just this pervasive feeling of like, i guess the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ joke's on me, huh? you're making me sit through your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ randy pitchford wannabe resetera tier standup, you're putting ButtKnight's face with his butt chin xD on my hud at all ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ times in case i get too shy about the idea of having a boner about anime girls while A Man is present.

i'm not sure where the developers are from, but as bad as brown hair main character kun is in every harem anime and porn game ever, at least he isn't actively trying to make my penis softer by looking sooo comedically ugly and being called ButtKnight (maybe when you beat the game it goes way to go ButtKnight! and you see him having sex with all the girls!) and being on the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hud at all times lol. sometimes it feels like French people are the worst for this, to the point many seem to have a straight up fetish for ugly men. are the developers French..? just a shot in the dark.

anyway, i want to like this game so badly. it's like 80% of the way to being amazing, and then they smear dog poopy all over parts of it because they started feeling too panicky about the idea of like working on a horny video game without making it seem like this big stupid joke and having mr magoo at all times on the hud like doomguy to occasionally slide in and say something like claptrap and then fart.

so i guess i'll tepidly recommend it, but with a disclaimer. lol. but i mean the game isn't out yet. maybe you could make a teehee funny joke option that censors all the men's faces with mosaics, or replaces them with stuffed animals, or you could pay an actual japanese porn artist to make alternate art for all the men? can we all convince the developers this would be really funny before the game is actually released?

again, it's almost amazing. i want to like it so bad. maybe you could just put a helmet on all the men.

EDIT: lol, im glad theres a demo because i had it paused to write this, and when i started playing and saw the rotating buttknight head on the loading screen and ButtKnight got a powerup and i saw his butt more xD i said out loud to myself "i literally can't play this" and closed it immediately. it's a bold choice artistically and i respect that they're going for it despite it losing them sales, as an artist, but i also hate it. they could have made him look like jump king!

EDIT EDIT: for more enjoyment, go back and read this in trevor from gta 5's voice.

EDIT EDIT EDIT: JESUS JUST MAKE THE *PLAYER* A HOT GIRL TOO!!! WHY ISNT THE BUTTKNIGHT A HOT GIRL??? ITS SO ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ OBVIOUS!!! EVERYONE WOULD LIKE IT MORE!!! IF YOURE SO SCARED TO SEEM GAY THAT YOU CANT DRAW GUYS THAT ARENT TOTALLY DISGUSTING JUST DRAW GIRLS SINCE YOURE GOOD AT THAT!!! ♥♥♥♥ SAKE!!! AAAAA!!!

EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT: you know, for a game called ButtKnight, there's sure a lot of focus on boobs.......... i bet you see buttknights butts on various parts of his body more than you see girls asses, honestly. again, it's so close to being ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ amazing, and overall if i'm being objective – like, not taking into account how frustrated i am that the overall thing is unplayable for me – the game is maybe 75% amazing. the gameplay seems cool, mechanically! the art is objectively high quality! they just smeared dog poopy on 25% of it, and the smell of that 25% is so bad i'd rather go play like a japanese porno game that doesn't have *any* dog poopy.

[jet-bradley]

So does this mean you're outta the TRONblr community for good?

That post was a joke, but... Honestly? Probably at least for a while. I need a breather from it. I think I've hit a point where I just don't take as much enjoyment from it anymore. I resonated with TRON 2.0 partly because it was a retro shooter, and I still fw it as that? You can pry the weapon sounds in that game out of my cold dead hands, lol. But I think I need a break from everything else.

I've honestly been growing uncomfortable with TRONblr for a while now. It's got a cliquey streak that people don't really address, because a lot of the drama is mostly just people whispering behind each others' backs in other apps. The fact that it's a small fandom where people know each other to be more judgemental than they let on, can make it really difficult to post about more niche topics. I don't just mean being a 2.0 blogger here; weird kinks, more exploratory meta, less popular character opinions, you name it. There's... reasons almost none of my plural Tron friends post about it on Tumblr.

And it's not something you can combat by just... All being friends and getting over it (tm). Someone who cyberstalked and doxxed me is in this fandom on Tumblr. I've got another friend who had the same thing happen to them from someone else in Tronblr. There's no amount of "sometimes you need to communicate like adults and stop holding things against people and just all hold hands and be nice to each other!" that will EVER get me to reach out to that individual again. Because of the tiny nature of the fandom, a lot of people I care about are mutuals with him. I just have to let go.

I still consider myself to be good friends with the people I know from Tronblr. But I'm mainly in contact with a lot of them through other places (like Mastodon and Discord), so I've unfollowed most of them on here. The ones I still follow, I really only follow for other things, unless they're largely a 2.0 blog.

Anyhow. You might see me around when there's more 2.0 content, but honestly? Aside from the next KA mod update, that's not happening, and we all know that.

[phoenix-is-the-hottest-thing]

hello, i hope you're having a nice morning/day/evening/night! do you have any tips on how to do pacing properly in fics? any advice would be appreciated!

Mmm for me it's been a lot of practice, rough outlining, and fine-tuning at the edit stage! But let's see what I can come up with.

Scene scope:

Write your thing then reread it (aloud if you can), see whether you find it too slow or too fast or whatever.

If it's too fast, take a step back and describe things more. Where are they? How does it feel? Anything the characters are thinking about? Let them breathe!

If it's too slow, cut down on the above, or review your structure. Scenes can remain interesting even if what they're talking about isn't plot relevant, it often comes down to whether it's stuff the reader cares about, or the way it's presented. Shorter paragraphs or intermissions, jokes, etc, anything that can spice it up a little if it's too slow!

Watch out for your sentence length; you'll need to vary them or you'll feel it's monotone (boring <--> slow). Also, use proper capitalization, formatting, spelling, and punctuation! This is an integral part of pacing.

Last thing, not exactly pacing, but helps tie it together smoothly: make sure your sentences and paragraphs aren't changing subjects midway and eliminate unwanted ambiguities over which characters gendered pronouns refer to.

If "she" and "her friend" are Alice and Bianca respectively in the first half, unless you want to confuse people intentionally, you can't call Bianca "she" in the second half, the subject of that part is still assumed to be Alice! You need to make it clear there is a new subject before you can call Bianca "she" instead of "[Alice]'s friend".

Why? Because writing is communication. You need to be clear to get your message across! That's why proper format is important. Texting with your friends has a low standard, but if you expect someone to get into your writing you need to make it relatively easy for them. If your writing is hard to read they will drop it.

Proper pacing makes stories flow smoothly~ Then, the reader won't even notice they've been reading for a long time!

Story scope:

Outlines are your friends, see if the reader will go a long time without the answer to a question or a scene you expect they'll be excited about (or YOU! Your enjoyment also matters!). If you're not into outlines, at least reread your past writing or try to figure out where you're going with stuff so you get a better feel of the overall pacing.

You may need to remind the readers of important facts offhand shortly before they become relevant again if something goes a long time without being talked about.

If you find your story's pacing to be too fast, let your characters breathe and talk to one another, add some scenes that develop them or showcase who they are. Fluff like this doesn't need to be plot relevant but it shouldn't be pointless nor destructive— though, if the point is a chuckle or explaining why someone's out of action, it's not what I mean by pointless.

By "pointless" I mean when even you're getting bored, or they're doing something they've already done without change, or it's information that's both boring and irrelevant, etc. By "destructive" I mean something that goes against something else that's important in your work, like messing up characterization, over-elaborating to the point of creating a plot hole, or going against your message.

Pointless scenes makes readers confused or bored (see: all the project STIGMA stuff in hi3 lately) while destructive scenes makes readers angry (see: character assassination in hi3 lately). And so on and so forth.

To be honest, a little of those is fine, especially if they're fun for you to write. Just... watch out, or you'll exhaust your readers' good will.

Last words

Feel free not to follow my advice if you don't like it, and happy writing! I know what I'm talking about but you are the only one who gets to decide what's in your story.

[thattimdrakeguy]

Every time i see someone try to defend James Gunn, they just repeat what he said while acting like it's genius. And it reminds me of apes eating their own shit.

like thanks, luv, really fucking putting in the man power to add to the conversation

couldn't give less of a shit people might like it, 'cause have you seen the dc fandom? they'll eat anything as long as it vaguely looks like something they may or may not like, or at least something in the peripheral of what they like

and it isn't a crime to like stuff, but it also isn't a crime to not like stuff either, honey bunch

but fucking hell. over a thousand likes on tweets that are saying absolutely nothing of merit. and i am so confused

No shit he's only going to be saying shit people want to hear.

And I'm some Snyder Cult bastard, I don't think I liked any Snyder DC movie all the way. Most of them were severely lacking.

but so many of james gunn's decisions are still wack as fuck

like how many of zack snyder's decisions are wack as fuck

James Gunn's skipping how many robins? and i know, he says he'll have all of them, but fucking hell that's so ridiculous if this universe is supposed to last awhile. all those stories that you can take inspiration from, critically adored stories that have immense cinematic potential

and james gunn's bright idea IS TO MAKE A BASTARDIZED ADAPTATION OF A STORY THAT ONLY WORKED BECAUSE OF VERY VERY SPECIFIC SITUATIONS THAT HE IS PURPOSELY NOT GONNA HAVE

that is one of the stupidest things i've ever heard in my life. the fact i haven't seen more people say that sounds ridiculous is baffling me. because while i can sometimes get why people wouldn't sometimes with many other things i say, i cannot with this. it's like he's TRYING to make a shitty batman movie. or at least an insanely disappointing one that let go of the gold he had literally right in front of him

i'm not asking for a word by word, panel by panel recreation of a story. JUST USE THE OBVIOUSLY PREVIOUSLY EXISTING FANTASTIC WORK INSTEAD OF COMPLETELY MISUNDERSTANDING WHY AN okay at best STORY WORKED

and he's going to have all these random movies, but not include characters that would be important to the greater DC world?

and he got the guy that directed a flash parody and pretended it was a serious movie to do this batman movie? when he made batman look like the Dude from Big Lewbowski and talk in a way that didn't even resemble Batman? and made all of his problems seem like a joke?

also while they're making sequels the critically acclaimed Batman movie, that people are more likely to look more forward to, because even though i didn't care for the movie, it at least looks like some cinematic effort was put into it enough to be an enjoyable watch that doesn't make you question your life choices because of how stupid it is. it's a lacking movie to me, but at least i feel like the people involved tried in a way that didn't feel like a child writing a fan fiction

'cept maybe a teenager, with kurt cobain inspired batman

i don't have to take a side to decide shit is wack as fuck

many thinks, are incredibly wack

i am a human being with a brain, i can look at things and figure out that shit looks like it's going to be total garbage, and will at best only be a good movie if you know jack shit or have no standards

just watch and talk about shit like human beings. i don't care if you like it or not, because you know what saying falsified bullshit about a guy you don't know or like, looks like? like you're a fucking maniac

like it

don't like it

but why is it so hard to people act like people? i keep avoiding anything DC related on my recommended trends on twitter, then i have a moment where i hope for the best, and every time, it's just garbage everywhere

it's not difficult to consume things in a world layered with shades of gray.

this black and white bullshit is fucking infuriating and makes it real hard to enjoy anything, when you have an echo chamber of dumbasses clamping down on it on the internet

i'm not even asking people to act like well-mannered gentlemen. that would be boring, and i feel people should be free to express their emotions as long as they aren't hurting anyone

i'm just asking them to think a little harder before they say the dumbest shit imaginable

james gunn is the guy who made one of the main points of guardians 3, that heroes don't kill people. while every appearance of the characters is them killing people, because they deserve to be killed.

like i'm not making a plea about the importance of the death penalty

but giving an obviously highly dangerous person, who has the potential to dismantle the fucking universe at least a smackrel of a chance to get out, is fucking stupid

it's stupid

superman letting lex luthor live, because he's just a man, and hasn't done anything to that extreme, may make that make sense

having batman not kill because he's worried he won't stop killing himself gives us an interest character perspective

giving the villain who still has a chance to be better, a chance to get better, allows that moral to be a thing

but letting the heroic murderers let the guy that killed conceivably BILLIONS AND BILLIONS, UPON BILLIONS OF PEOPLE DIE BECAUSE HE WAS JUST A TICKLE UNPLEASED

IS

STUPID

i'm not trusting that mother fucker to make a whole universe work. when his movies before have only worked, exclusively because they were allowed to be their own things in the corner of a universe, where they hardly have any meaning to the rest of the world, besides a relation to the big stories big bad

he is a good film maker. i like most of his movies

but fucking hell. it's not insanity to insist the guy who has shown he makes bad decisions so far, may be making bad decisions. even if in the end the decisions may not be AWFUL

it doesn't mean he's doing a good job in the slightest

i'll give the fact he isn't bringing back the whole justice league a break, because we just had a justice league and maybe time will be good

but his other decisions make him look like a moron to me

[cryptid-killjoy]

Scary. Flotsam would think thank goodness for natural selection. Things were always as they should be. He was pretty certain she was on the other side chasing Jet with frying pans and he was turning it right around on her, and frying up her eyeballs on the very same skillet and eating them over easy in Hell, and then using her hair as dental floss. Bam! Frying pan. Cannibal chase! Skewer! Sizzle. Mmm. Yum. Repeat. He can see it stuck on a loop. Probably has something to do with Pierre. Maybe he thought it was funny too and kept watching it once it happened for his own enjoyment? Who knew? Flo's dreams are weird like that. He gets a kick out of them. He's sort of like Roger Rabbit when he tells those to Thomas. As least they're funny. They make him laugh.

His laughter now was similar only far more extreme since it involved more than his own brain and came out of Thomas's mouth even inadvertently.

"You have no idea."

Thomas added to his thoughts and only made the moment better helping him envision the actual picture not just the one he'd made up in his head. It was more fun than the one he'd imagined.

"Yeah, actually... you do. You play an instrument and you're good at it. I think your rhythm is just fine." His brows gave an uplift with an air of insinuation and let his eyes drift down towards Thomas's pelvis. "Very, very fine indeed. If your rhythm was off it was all her. I can attest to that." He chuckled.

Then an even bigger grin grew when the Molotov cocktails were mentioned. What a great memory. Thomas brought that one up every now and then and Flotsam never grew tired of it because it was the proof in his mind that so called goodie-goodie hunter guy wasn't what he claimed to be. He saw the guy have too much fun. It wasn't forced. It wasn't fake. He knew it. People don't fake being forced to do those sorts of acts. It was all big, bad, secret official crush from there. Oh, Flotsam always sort of had one, an attraction, but that sealed the deal. It wasn't just looks then or that feeling he gets from riling someone up. It was a real connection. He just felt it. He had fun with him. Something clicked and he never let it go somewhere inside. He was just also despite his reputation was a person with a sense of duty and focused where he was needed. Family. Always family.

What really got him about the bomb comment though was the context. He knew Thomas was joking around as was he but he said to go back and bomb the sitch up. The whole thing kept Flotsam laughing and all, but he still shook his head no.

"Maybe. I'm not sure I'd change one little bloody thing. I'm too happy."

It was one of those could we really be us if we didn't go through what we went though comments? He wasn't trying to get deep. He was just grinning at his partner. Did he wish he could have saved his loved one some pain? Sure. Of course he does. But, fuck nah. Could they ever be this tight if they hadn't? No fucking way.

Hence the song that came to mind. It was about living in the moment. Absolutely. As they were. It was also about enjoying whatever the Hell passes and what they go through. That was his point. Enjoy the roller coaster as people say. Enjoy the ride. He was feeling pretty up right now. He was feeling like the next drop wasn't a crash landing, but thrill ride full of fun waiting to happen. He was strapped in with Thomas. That's what that smile was. For as wired and weird, maybe even gloomy as he felt when he left NZ he felt damn good right now. He'd live in a musical any day the way he was feeling.

Dancing in the street with Thomas and turnips. He was A-Okay. Then when they got back to the beach and the picnic was all strewn out with the turnips and the pups on the blankets he felt so free. They were talking about buying more property for goodness sake. He couldn't believe he was a land owner to begin with. His business owned places but that was different.

"Yeah, I guess celebrities do."

Flotsam gave that one a think. Think, think, think. He suddenly had a flash back to the Hundred Acre Wood.

"Is Valerie a celebrity? Her song was on the radio. Electric Voodoo... I don't know... when you're in metal circuits it's hard to tell. It's niche. Let's do ourselves a favor and never move to LA just in case." He laughed. "And never vacation in New York. So boring. You seen one skyscraper you seen them all. I'm not about the traffic. Unless there's some cool event there let's just keep that off the list."

"Just remind me if we ever lose all our money and we lose all this shit we're gaining that it we can just promise to look back and say it was fun while it lasted. But, that's yes. This is so great. It's like a double birthday. It's getting close. A pre-birthday. We're getting Ireland, er the Emerald Isles. You're buying me the ocean."

That's where the grin blossomed. Thomas was buying him the ocean. The ocean front cottage was already a fun surprise. Getting to keep it was like a fantasy of a life time. He didn't know if it was for sale, but Thomas had a magic bartering mouth. He was good at that with zero threats and everything. Usually. It was right after that right as Flotsam was drawing on his turnip something caught his eye.

"Hey. What's that?" He crawled on all fours setting his turnip aside a moment out a few feet and swept some sand aside. He furrowed his brows as he pulled out a shell. He sat back on his skinny rump again to inspect it with both hands holding it closer to his face, but he was still jazzed on the other topic, grin still spread.

"Giving me the ocean. I can't believe it. I feel like that's a song. He Gave Me the Ocean."

Then he popped the clam shaped shell open. "Look it has both sides." He said curiously and then when he pried the two pieces apart. "Woah. I think. No way. I feel a-" He got up on his knees to pick out the hard piece. "It is. Yes. It is. Look." Then he knee walked up to Thomas to hold a tiny pearl the size of a little friendship bead in the palm of his hand. "Can't believe I really found that.... on our beach too."

Yes. Their beach. He knew it would happen. Once Thomas said something could be true it always could if Flotsam so wanted it. He wanted it.

"What should we do with it?"

Rapunzel could never be Barbie. Her greatest aspiration was to become a social worker, and thank fuck that didn’t work out, or there’d be even more screwed up people out there. She settled quickly on being a mooch. He was still peeved by the fact that she had once talked to his work and got him a week off behind his back and then planned a whole trip to England. Spur of the moment plans? Great! Surprises? Sure! Making a man take a week off work when he was still new-ish to the job and use up all of the vacation days that he ever had, and rid him of the chance of making money that he could have used a lot more than a trip to see his mother? Nah, that’s not right, innit. He’s been stewing on that for near on twenty years.

Laughter was usually a good sign. It didn’t sound too manic. I didn’t exactly sound like the kind of laughter that usually covered up a cry either.

“I’m glad my former misery brings you such comfort,” Thomas said, though he was chuckling. It really was a whole lifetime ago. Plenty of wasted time. But he was making up for it now, wasn’t he? He was exploring the world with his favorite person by his side. Someone who would never put him through all of that annoying disney princess shit. “Practicing is one thing, but having some flouncy woman tell you that you aren’t moving right - oh, it was absolutely tragic. I know about rhythm, thank you very much.”

They were always going to be them. Marriage required being best friends throughout, it was even more important than the romantic aspect sometimes. Having each other’s backs no matter what, always keeping a couple of brews in the fridge to have a chat and bitch about life sometimes. That aspect wasn’t going way.

“Yes please,” He grinned. “Moltov cocktail that bitch, like old times.”

There were still a lot of times when he wanted to go back and time and beat himself over the head, like Rafiki to Simba with that big stick of his. Stop being so stupid. Stop being so pretty-girl-blind. Stop falling for the first person that seems to need you in any capacity. Doesn’t matter that it makes you feel like a big man, just makes you into a beta in the end. But alas, he only met one time traveller and he couldn’t take him that far back, so there was no point in dwelling on it too much. He had everything now. Better late than never.

“Not even a moment over,” He said, making his statement all the more dramatic, but he meant it. Flotsam had one of those ageless-type faces. It was beautiful. Maybe there was something to growing up with the swamp air and muds.

They didn’t need Kuzco in order for things to be musical. Thomas was a natural piano player and Flotsam - he was just skilled at everything else. This bursting out in song moment felt a bit like a musical but it wasn’t nearly as annoying as one. The turnip vendor was very happy with the big purchase and began bagging right away, not commenting on the singing because every good businessman knows that you don’t ask questions when money is being thrown at you.

It wasn’t really a song that he knew but he took part eagerly, watching, holding the stroller until Flotsam took his hand and they did a spin. Impromptu. Not choreographed. Not to Ed Sheeran. Just natural, like dancing was supposed to feel.

It was a good message too. And something that they both did. Enjoy each moment. Look forward to the next, but not at the expense of the present.

--

Thomas had out a knife, was carving the turnip carefully. It felt a lot different to a pumpkin. Most of the ones that he had seen while researching ideas came out looking like mummy heads, which was indeed spooky in its own right but he wanted a couple that were more just .. them.

“It’s no less crazy than when we started looking into properties on our honeymoon,” He said with a little shrug. These grand ideas - they didn’t seem outrageous. They seemed entirely within the realm of possibility. A dream they could reach. “Don’t celebrities do it all the time? I don’t see why we couldn’t. It is a gorgeous spot.”

[autumnrory]

love to say i’m a fan of horror films even though i end up disliking a lot of them

[anxietywriter]

Boundary Breaking

A prompt list of things people do that either push, invalidate, or flat out break character's boundaries as well as a list of possible boundaries + brief desc. (i switch pronouns and pov's a lot in this, my bad)

Don't touch my hair without asking: hate it when anyone, even friend or family, just randomly come up and stroke my hair, especially from behind because wtf? headpats are more ok for me since they're not creeping on my hair but it might not be ok for others :)

people responding to this boundary by saying that they and their friends braid each others hair all the time and like playing with each other's hair, equating that to sneaking up on someone and caressing their hair

asking if they can pat my head and saying "i don't know if it's okay because you're kind of weird about that," yeah that's weird of me /s

people that go behind me, scoop up my long hair, touching my neck, and just going "your hair feels nice" completely umprompted, like what made you think this was okay

people that just randomly decide to put their grubby paws on natural hair?? like no especially if they fuck up your do

silently reaching out for my hair, instead of telling me something's in my hair. like tell me, use your words, either i will let you go for it or i will do it myself but please vocalize it

i personally can't get my hair washed at salons bc i don't like people touching my hair/scalp that much,, makes me squeamish

I've got stuff to do: whenever you try to leave, or tell someone that you can only stop by, they always try to get you to stay any way possible. to the point where they will tell you that what you want to do or will do isn't important or as enjoyable as spending time with them.

peer pressuring you, even jokingly, for 20 minutes, because at that point it is no longer a joke and it is exasperating

everytime you try to end the night/leave, they try to reel you back in by saying things like 'oh do you have to leave now' or 'you could just make a quick stop and come back' or 'we could watch more of this show'

when you respond to their texts or something at night after hanging out they say something along the lines of 'smh you're still awake, we could be hanging out rn' guilting you

they minimize whatever you're working on or whatever you're stressed about, trying to make it seem less important in order to get you to goof off or hang out with them

even if you have work and are hanging out with them and they say it's fine, they still interrupt you while you're doing work to pay attention to whatever they find absolutely essential for you to see

when you feel like there's not a lot of wiggle room for what you need to do versus focusing/hanging out with them, you need to enforce that boundary of prioritizing your needs because the situation is nearly codependent

No unsolicited comments on my art: i personally don't do art around anyone really unless it's in class and whenever i happen to outside of class, it does not go well. even after just one comment, it feels like they're watching my every move which kind of kills my flow. also they often comment without knowing anything about the piece and it comes off as very ignorant rather than a meaningful critique.

positive ones are at least well-meaning, but you aren't given context/the concept of the art, it might be best to leave it alone, especially if it's a sketch

negative comments do not help, even if they are joking, especially if you try to life their art up it can feel very irritating

art has ugly phases, wait until it's done or get out

if you aren't told the concept of the art and you make a negative comment, you have to understand that you run the risk of doing that to a piece that the artist made to reflect a sensitive topic

safest bet imo is if the artist isn't asking for criticism (ex: if they're in a classroom setting or directly asking) then might be best to hold back

artists, especially young ones, are often still growing and still developing their own art style and trying to really grasp proportions or composition. so don't be quick to tear them down when they trust you enough to be part of the process.

I don't like physical affection: for my lovelies that just don't like physical touch. most peeps like physical touch, so it's super uncomfortable when those peeps try to force that touch on you, especially after explicitly saying nope. like creepy crawlies all over you skin ew

never force people into hugs, don't care if it's cute or if that's your love language, it's not theirs, it discomforts them

don't just sidle up to them casually and squish yourself to them. yeah they notice, and it's also kind of creepy

accidental touches/brushes are fine and sometimes unavoidable, but the deliberate shit, the booping, the pats, the arm linking, nope. count them out.

constantly forcing them into physical affection isn't going to make them warm up to it or get used to it, it makes them associate physical affection with force. so yeah it's even worse than before congrats

Don't call me that: certain adjectives, terms, names, all of those can have different associations to different people, especially if they're a minority or have a certain life experience. for example, i hate being called cute because if i know that person irl, then i know that it is because i am small and not taken seriously, which i find irritating, like listen to me.

if they are uncomfortable being called a certain term or name, refrain. there can be negative experiences associated with that, find a damn alternative

trans rights are human rights and it's 2022 bitch, not that hard to at the very least respect pronouns. get used to saying the correct pronouns for someone, it's actually not super difficult or a burden. imo pronouns aren't a super big deal, if someone likes certain pronouns i'm happy to oblige, doesn't cost me anything to make them feel better

if they have an aversion to a certain pet name or adjectives like 'pretty' or 'handsome' or 'baby' again, avoid it there's probably some negative experiences associated with them. continuing to say it in a loving/affectionate tone does not necessarily change that association for them

names and pronouns are kind of an important part of someone's identity, so ignoring their wishes or making fun of them hurts and sucks ass

joking around and saying 'i know you don't like it when i call you/that cute but it is!' isn't fun, it's not quirky, you're literally ignoring a boundary that person set and are making them uncomfortable, even if it's only slightly

Personal bubble please: some people have no sense of personal space or respect and it's just bothersome, like not irritating but definitely discomforting. getting too close, especially from behind can be kind of creepy, like you do not need to be this close??

me no likey when people stand behind me and look over my shoulder, giving me horror game vibes over there

there is so much space on this couch/bench why are our thighs touching, get away

i absolutely love you but if your arm knocks into mine one more time it will be war, just make a lil steppy over

please do not just fucking touch me with your whole palm this is uncomfortable why do you need this much surface area, pull back a little bit my dude

why is your face so close, back up, stop, do not pass go, do not collect 200 monopolians or whatever it's called, leave the bubble

Why are you touching my stuff: everything has a place, it is organized chaos more often than not for me. i will remember it if i see it, but if you put it into a drawer when i am not around, i will mourn its loss and not find that thing until a decade later. also like, grubby hands off, it is mine to do with as i see fit

hate going into my room and seeing all my stuff moved around, like where is anything. like i appreciate the work and effort that went into organizing/cleaning but i am internally screaming because i can't recognize anything

when people are just picking at my stuffed animals and hoodies, looking kind of judgy, like leave them alone,,, i love them they're quite literally my comfort items

yeah you better stay away from the bookcase, that monstronsity is mine to clutter and organize in an incomprehensible fashion

they just start opening random cubbies/containers, like no? get out, that is my secret stash of unhealthy snacks and kinetic sand

i am deathly afraid that you will break/drop that glass or fragile object, please set it down in a gentle manner

if i ever come in and i see you quickly retract your little robot arms back into its socket, suspiciously positioned close to any object on a random surface, i will end you

just ask dude, if you're genuinely curious i'd probably be happy to talk about it and let you touch it (for the most part, no one lays a damn finger on my figurines)

Stop leaning over to see my screen: some things are not meant for others to see. the internet's weird. i'm weird. i like this weird thing and am not ready to share it with the world, step away from the phone dammit. it's also actually awful because i am 99% sure they see me trying to keep the phone outside of their sight, clearly not wanting them to see the screen, and yet there they still are.

when you turn the phone away or physically try to scooch out of their view and they still crane their neck over, like no. that was not an invitation

when you physically move your hand away and they still try to look or even grab for it like no, just no

instead of confronting them, just changing the screen or having the phone off around them bc you're tired of having to manhandle their eyes away from your screen

getting a fancy privacy screen for your phone and they question it, trying to guilt you for some strange reason? like 'what did you get that for' or 'i mean if you have nothing to hide'

them just looking over your shoulder to get a straight on view of the screen

[le-panda-chocovore]

Someone probably made a joke about them being gays, probably saying something about them enjoying having a dick in their mouth, and Karma was just like "Oh, no, Gakushuu doesn't do that."

And it confuses the person because, erm, what does that mean ? And Karma shrugs, blasé "He doesn't do blowjobs, is all. I however am a Cock Sucking Enjoyer for sure ~"

And at this point, he has already caught everyone's attention and they're all looking at the couple. Gakushuu sighs. He doesn't want to talk about his sex life to these people.

"Wait," someone else joined the conversation. "He doesn't ?? Why ???"

Gakushuu isn't going to answer, he's already gone to make himself a hot cup of tea.

"He doesn't like it, so he doesn't do it. Is it so hard to understand ?" Karma looks around and guesses that yes, it is, given how they all stare at him with wide eyes. "You guys realize that you don't have to give a head if you don't enjoy it, right...?"

No response. He frowns.

"Right ???"

A few people clear their throats, a few other look away, and some just look like they got their third-eye opening.

"Alright," Karma sighs, a bit dismayed by their reactions. "Let's go back to the basic. You guys are at least aware that sex is supposed to be fun, I hope ?" He seems relieved when most of them nodded. "Okay, and you do know about consent ?" Again, they agree. "And consent means that you shouldn't do things that you don't want to do. You're okay with that ?"

This time they're more hesitant when they nodded, because they start to see where's he coming from. And they might not like it.

"If you have a vagina and you don't want to do anal stuff, you say it, and you don't. It doesn't matter that your boyfriend thinks it's sexy, you don't like it, so it's a no. That's just the same thing for blowjobs. Gakushuu doesn't like the feeling, so we don't do it. I give him a good head and he gives me his ass inte-"

"Karma." The strawberry blonde is back with his tea, he listened to his boyfriend's discourse until it became too personal. "You don't need to say that."

"Eh, sorry," the redhead smirks, not looking sorry at all. He's rather amused by Gakushuu's intervention, but he turns back to his public. "So, like I was saying, if sucking a dick makes you uncomfortable, then just don't. If someone insists that it's important and it's how sex works and it'd make them feel good, just tell them to fuck themselves. You don't have to go out of your ways just to please your partner. You're supposed to enjoy this too."

The information slowly sinks in the listeners' brains, and some girls' faces lighten up when they realize that Karma is right. That is some amazing news and they clearly won't forget about it from now on.

However, a few of them seem more anxious, sad perhaps.

"But..." A twenty-something woman starts, visibly nervous. "Does that mean that if we did it when we didn't enjoy it... Well.... I mean, my ex really liked it when I did that, and I wanted to make him happy so..."

Karma hums, and takes a look at his boyfriend as to ask him what he's thinking about it. The strawberry blonde sips his cup and walks closer to his partner.

"It depends," he says with a soft voice, the one he uses during study sessions with the other students at his Uni. "You can do it if you want it, you just need to know that you don't have to. Wanting and enjoying are two differents things, by the way. If you take pleasure into giving someone else's pleasure, and if that sits fine by you, then you can keep doing that."

"But you really have to ask yourself 'do I want it or do I just wish I wanted it ?' because sometimes putting your own feelings aside to please people can be really hurtful," Karma added, putting his hand on Gakushuu's back.

The strawberry blonde leans against him and sips his tea again. "As long as you feel comfortable enough to do this kind of things, it's fine."

Karma nods and leaves a kiss on his boyfriend's cheek, who immediately rolls his eyes but can't hide the soft smile on his lips. They go on their way together after that, letting the people think about this conversation.

"I think we're gonna see a few breakups in the next few days," Karma points out, making Gakushuu chuckle. "And that might be our fault."

"Probably yeah, but that might be for the better."

"Mmh. Do you want me to blow you tonight ?"

"Shut up."

Karushuu Headcannons NSFW

Karma absolutely adores sucking cocks and he would swallow everything nicely while Gakushuu is a "Don't put this anywhere near my mouth" type of person

[shoezuki]

Preamble that I feel bad for the guy tbh but how he's dealing w/ it is on him. End a the day he's a whole stranger and he's not like two, he can handle himself (presumably) and if he can't it ain't our business. Also necessary preamble that there are many Ranboo enjoyers who aren't cringe. A lot of them actually. To the point where I don't really like to bring stuff like this up in specific bc it Does magnify problems via exposure

However. Disclaimer that this is a complaint about the worst aspects of my time in a fandom and that this is not all of it aside

TWT RANBOO STANS *DESPISE* LISTENING TO "OUR" STREAMER LIKE NO ONE FUCKING ELSE. THEY FUCKIN' HATE IT. EVERY WORD THAT IS SAID ONSTREAM OR ON ANY OF HIS MEDIA ACCTS IS NOTHING TO THEM. Ranboo is literally not even a streamer to them the way they act. The man will beg, literally fucking BEG over and over to not mention him in people's chats, to not *yell at people in chat to not spam,* to please not use him as a profpic if they're getting into drama, and then concede ground to please not use him as a profpic if you're sending threats, please do not fucking send threats, please, he has said this so many times, and Yet my comrades' twt blocklists are full of Ranboo profpics that send death threats with 0 shame. 0 shame, what so fucking ever. Chat too! Chat the fuck too! Chat is way better than twt bc at least it's not violent but I swear to Christ they are literally deaf! Begging for answers to questions that are answered in his bios and over and over onstream already and in the FAQ that is RIGHT THERE if you scroll down a HALF FUCKING CENTIMETER! Spamming stupid shit, and then spamming "CHAT STOP" even as streamer exhaustedly says "chaaat putting 'chat stop' just makes more spam".

Literally not a single Ranboo stan has basic damn listening or reading comprehension. It shows in how people fail to comprehend basic fucking facts abt his RP character (everyone knew this was coming) and it shows in how no matter how much he fucking pleads people to stop sending fucking death threats with his face attached or says he's uncomfortable giving out certain information people will just trample on those boundaries as if they ain't fucking there. Being in the Ranboo stan twtbase is literally training to blatantly ignore boundaries and dehumanize streamers and it shows in every aspect of how they treat not just "our" streamer but every single person, character, and social media personality they goddamned come across as text to speech machines, dressup dolls, and punching bags

It honestly blows my fucking mind. Like. Ostensibly, you enjoy this streamer and his content, right? Which I would think means you watch his content? But apparently fucking not!

It is honestly fucking disgusting it is unbelievable. I don't like to dwell on it for aforementioned reasons and like, dwelling is also smth streamer has mentioned correctly as Not Good, but genuinely the situation in certain small vocal pockets of the Ranboo stanbase is horrific and I hope these people get so much help and also maybe better material than increasingly unreadable censorship for "die." Actual productive debate is really fun, guys, come have a redemption arc and argue about the effects New L'Manberg had on c!Ranboo with me, please, why can't we all be nice, god, why,

Anyway that's my piece. Thank you for hearing me out I believe this is the first time I've gotten the chance to try to flex the new lack of charalimit for asks and I must say I enjoy it

YEAAAAAA FUCK IT UUUPPPPP FUCK YESSSSSSSSSSS JESUS FUCK YAAAAA

tbhtbh I USED to watch ranboo but i jus like. Cant anymore from donations n the unfortunate fact that So Many People whove gotten At me on twitter have ranboo pfps and how a lot of them treat him is genuinely Gross to me. Even jus w like. Seeing shit bout him and tubbo being 'roommates' rn like i HATE that shit. Ppl objectify him n ignore his boundaries n jus do such horrible shit w his name all over their accts n its despicable. I feel so harshly for the dude like that shit Sucks. But also he does tend to 'give in' to twitter shit sometimes like when he was saying not to trend stuff bout his meetup because he didnt want to 'overshadow' current events (altho ppl on twitter couldnt even listen to him for THAT)

Its jus a Shame cuz like. The dude Is genuinely cool. N he cares a lot. I feel his 'fans' of this calibre take advantage of his leniency/desire to please people and his Anxieties around messing up in any minor way n they jus. Walk on him in that regard. Cant even respect their own streamer

I think a bit ago i said somethin on it like. How sometimes i think these twitter ppl dont even LIKE ranboo or actually Watch Him. They jus want to feel some sort of moral superiority of stanning an 'unproblematic' cc and have some sense of control over a cc considering how he was made to apologize on his alt for those largrly harmless 'i dress like a lesbian' jokes he made. Like truly this weirdass gross community they made under his name is such a fucking shame n it sucks. No doubt its turned other ppl away from his streams Like Me

[tinyboxxtink]

"Black Magic" *Part 4*

Whoooooo! Okay alright here's 4, I don't know if I can get 5 up tonight but at least you'll have the whole "day". [you'll see]

YA'LL enjoy this because....it's gonna come crashing down. I'm so sorry. Maybe I should leave it here tonight. Yeah I might.

Also-- WINK! When you see it you'll know. 😉

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@omgsuperstarg

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@gibbs274

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@objection-argumentative

@aprildecker-blog

@lolliepopsicle

@madamsnape921

@stars-trash-18

Part 3

Part 5

-----------------------------

“Well!” he wiped tears away from his face and then yours before he gathered up your trash and threw it away. “ I think that's quite enough of the melodramatic stories today. Now it's time to show you my favorite place,”

He took your hands and let you further deeper into the park. You had never been this deep into Central Park before you don't think you'd ever actually been in Central Park, you've just passed it. You were kind of a shit New Yorker.

“Where are we going?” You asked as he pulled you faster down some steps until you reached what you could only describe as a “Cave”.

“You'll see,” he smiled as you approached the cave. You both walked inside and before you was something you never thought you'd see.

“Oh my god…” You said breathlessly. Are those…?”

“Penguins” You heard a smile in his voice as you stared. In front of you with a long glass tank encased in the stone. It was full of happy, smiling, swimming, penguins.

“How... why….why is this here?”

“Well the zoo is right next door.” He explained. “And they accidentally made the penguin exhibit about a foot outside of the zoo's zoning area. So, while it is technically part of the Central Park Zoo, this one area is completely free to the public. It beats paying $50.” He laughed.

“Penguins are my favorite,” you said softly as you just continued to stare at them. It was true. You loved penguins since you were a little girl and you had no idea why. They were just so cute.

“Mine too,” he smiled, taking his arms and pulling you into his chest from behind. They look so happy. And they're in little tuxedos. Which I highly approve of,” He joked. You giggled in response.

“I like to come here when I've had a really long day or a really bad day in court.” He continued to explain. “And just sit here and watch them; and imagine how much more enjoyable life would be as a penguin. Look at them they're so happy and carefree, not a worry in the world.”

“God wouldn’t that be nice,” You sighed. “No rent, no bills, no annoying job.” you have laughed, giving him a nudge

“And.. They are also monogamous,” He stopped laughing and turned you to face him.

“What?” You stopped laughing as well, giving him a stunned expression.

“Did you know that when a male penguin fancies a girl penguin he will look everywhere until he finds the perfect rock or pebble as an offering to said female. And if she accepts it, then they're together until they die.”

“So.. basically like an engagement ring,” You whispered. Oh god.. what was happening?

“Yeah I guess so they get engaged and married. Without the wedding of course.” He nodded.

“Can you imagine that? I mean they’d be pretty prepared already in their little tuxedos” you laughed, hopefully trying to change the subject getting away from marriage although you didn't really know how. “Rafael…”

Okay surely even if he was under this spell, was there kind of some kind of backstory? Did he think you had been together for a very long time? There's no way he was going to propose after one day was he?

“Don't worry carino, I'm not proposing. He laughed, noticing the panic in your eyes. "I'm not that crazy.”

“Right you laughed and nodded your head. “Of course. Because we've only known each other so shortly….?” You tried to ask in a leading way.

“Right. But if we're being totally honest,” he took your hands. “I think I fell in love with you the moment you walked in the door on your first day.”

You silently gasped.. Could that be true? Was that him making that up in his head? Did he have memories before today? Did he have real memories before today? How far did this thing go? Could he actually really be saying that? Your mind started swimming.

“I..” You looked into his eyes, searching for sincerity. Obviously it was there but you didn't know if it was fabricated or real. But any real form of sincerity was moot at this point. Right?

“Really?” Was all you could say back.

“Yeah,” he smiled while he stroked your hair. “Really,”

That was it you couldn't take this anymore. You Broke down crying once again, and threw your arms around him. You were holding him so tightly, as if he was going to disappear in front of your eyes any second.

“Please Don't leave me, you sobbed. “Please don't leave me,”

“Hey hey hey,” He took your arms and pulled you over to a bench in the cave. Then he sat you down and put both hands on your shoulders.” I'm not leaving you. I'm not going anywhere, okay? Never,”

“You can't say that,” You sobbed. You completely threw any thoughts of keeping this under wraps out the window.

"Why not?” He looked at you quizzically.

“Because….because this isn't real!!” You kept sobbing.

“What…? Baby you have to calm down,” He started getting really concerned.

“I….” You tried to find the words to explain it without sounding crazy. Then you realized it didn't matter.

“I...my roommate Chloe she's a...well she, she made this...stuff, that I put in your coffee yesterday and it made you think you're in love with me.” You realized you had said explanation a little too loudly, as the very few other people that were in the cave with you gave you strange looks and started to walk away. You looked at Rafael who was just staring at you in disbelief and confusion.

“What are you talking about?” He half laughed. Baby look I don't know what you think you did. But if you're talking about what I think you're talking about--- magic isn't real.”

“Yes it is!” You continued to sob. “I didn't believe it either. That's why I did it. I thought on the off chance maybe it would work but I didn't really think it worked like this” you gestured between the two of you.

“What, make an actual connection between us? Has anything you said to me today been a lie?”

“No” You started to calm yourself down.

“And I can promise you nothing I have done today has been a lie, or fabricated in any way,” He wiped the tears from your face.

“So again, I don't know what you think you did, but my feelings for you are real. The only magic here is the magic of true love,”

“See who says that?!” you cried angrily. “Nobody says that for real, Rafael. Not unless they're--”

“Under some kind of magic spell?” Rafael asked sarcastically

“This isn't funny!”

“Okay so what you're just saying is that tomorrow I'm going to wake up, and just think you're a normal girl and what? Think today was a fluke?”

“No.. you're not going to remember anything.”

“I really doubt that,”

“It's true! Why do you think I said back at Maria’s that I need you to hold on to this day? I need you to remember this day? I wasn’t just saying that to be cute.”

“Okay well I'm taking you seriously now. I'm committing this day to my memory this entire day even with your nutty little break down here.” He took both of your shoulders and looked at you seriously.

“Because I'm going to prove to you that this is not some kind of magic spell. It's me and you and our real feelings. I told you I fell in love with you the day I met you, that was before today. That was three months ago!”

Could that be true? Could this have just fast forwarded the time that it would have taken you to get here? Is he really going to remember this?

“Okay” was all you could say.

“Okay.” He smiled, pulling you into him again and kissing your forehead while stroking your hair. “I'm never going to forget you Y/N. I could never forget you,”

“Okay,” you repeated, believing him a little more this time.

Rafael glanced at his phone. Oh God it's four fifteen already,”

“So…? Do you turn into a pumpkin at 5?” You joked.

“No but I did promise Olivia that I would drop off some paperwork. Do you mind?”

Oh God you really don't want to face Liv again, at the risk of exposing your secret. But what else could you do?

“Yeah I guess that's fine.” You shrugged.

It definitely was NOT fine.

-----

You walked into the NYPD police station nervously, as if you were a hooker doing a perp walk. You hoped that maybe since Raphael had calmed down maybe Olivia would just think this morning was a joke after all. You hoped he wouldn't say anything.

“Olivia!” He walked over to her desk and still had your hand in his.

“Hey Rafa.. what is this? I thought you weren't dating your intern?” She frowned.

“Oh I'm not ... Apparently I'm under her spell,” He laughed.

Oh my God oh my God oh my God what…. Why was he being so flippant about this? Oh God.

“...Excuse me?” She asked him seriously.

“Did you get her in on this Y/N? Pretend that she has no idea about us?” He asked you while still laughing. You wanted to crawl into a hole.

“I don't have any idea about-- didn't you say this morning that you were kidding?” Olivia looked at you angrily.

“What? I don't remember this morning.” Rafael looked confused.

Oh God maybe it was starting to wear off and then forget-me-nots were working oh God oh God oh god….

“What is wrong with you?” Olivia put both of her hands on her shoulders, then she looked at you. “Did you actually do something to him?

What? No, I didn't do anything!” You cried defensively, hoping she would back off.

“Liv back off she didn't do anything. Magic isn't real. What is wrong with you?” Rafael stood in front of you.

“Then explain how you feel right now???” Olivia crossed her arms.

“What are you talking about? We've been in love for months now!”

Oh shit. Oh GOD.WHAT?

“WHAT?” Olivia almost screamed.

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to overeat like this." He gave her a look.

“Oh that is bullshit.” She spat, and then looked at you over his shoulder. “You did something to him and I will damn sure figure out what it is,”

“Liv you need to seriously back off,” Rafael increased the space between the two of you.

Liv nodded, but mouthed to you over his head with a whisper. “I am going to figure out what you did and you're going to pay.”

You gulped and looked at Rafael who was still glaring at Liv. “Look Olivia, you need to get over whatever thing you have for me and just let me be happy.”

That was it! That was why she was so upset about this. She was in love with him too. Oh God. You suddenly wondered how accessible that spell that Chloe did was.

“I.. you.. we…” She stammered. “Here's your warrant,” Rafael tossed some papers at her and walked out the door with your hand in his. You looked back at Liv who was still fuming. That can't be good.

----

“Can you believe the nerve of her?” He scoffed as you walked out.

“Yeah totally,” You laughed nervously.

“I'm sorry about her. She doesn't know when to stop beating a dead horse,” He sighed.

“So you know she's had a thing for you? And you've never had a thing for her?”

“I mean there was a time when we first met that I thought maybe something could happen. But too much time has passed and I don't feel that way about her anymore, but apparently she still does.” He shook his head.

“And besides whatever feelings I thought I had for her went out the window the moment I saw

you,” he smiled, pulling you in for a kiss.

“Oh I mean since this morning,” he teased. But you knew he was right on the money.

“Haha. Can we please not joke about it?” You asked dejectedly.

“I'm sorry carino. Let's go get some dinner huh? Forget about this?”

“Yes please” You smiled.

---

He took you to his favorite restaurant Forlini’s and you two had an amazing dinner laughing, talking and discussing Broadway shows.

"Wait so you saw RENT with the ORIGINAL cast?!"

"Yeah…." He lightly chuckled. "I know, I'm super old."

"Oh I wasn't going to say that at all. I was going to say you are so lucky!!!!” You squealed.

“So you've never seen a show on Broadway?” He asked.

“Well...when I first met Chloe she was working as a PA for one of the directors of a show that had just gone to Broadway. It didn't last very long; it wasn't that great of a show. Except for the leading actor in my opinion,”

“Oh really?” he looked at you curiously. “What show?”

“It was called “Leap Of Faith”, I think? It was based on some movie about some televangelist creep con man, who fell in love with the sheriff and his heart turned to gold or some lame-ass thing like that. You rolled your eyes

“Oh really was it that bad?” he laughed.

“I mean, the songs were good and like I said the leading man Raul Esparza was amazing,” You smiled as you sipped your wine.

“Raul Esparza? You know when I was younger, people used to say that I looked like him.” He chuckled as he sipped his scotch.

“Really?? Nah I don't see it. You're way more handsome,” you smiled.

You continued to have a fabulous dinner so fun and easy, you almost forgot it was all fantasy. Before you knew it, Rafael was walking you to your door.

"Well I had a fabulous 'last’ 24 hours with you mi amor,” Rafael smiled.

“Yeah.. me too,” you said sadly.

“You sure you don't want me to come in?” He asked you with mischievous eyes.

“No, you better not.” You wanted so badly to let him, but you didn't want tomorrow to be jarring for him.

"Oh right I might wake up tomorrow and forget where I am," he teased, tickling you. You laughed while he was doing it, but the pain of really knowing he was right knocked you right back to sadness.

"Well good night beautiful. I'll see you tomorrow" He grinned.

"Yeah…." You smiled sadly thinking "not like this,”

He kissed you gently, but you pulled him in for a deep long passionate kiss, desperately memorizing every detail. His tongue, his mouth, his hands, his smell, his skin on yours.

"Wow, I should be under spells more often he chuckled. He gave you one last small kiss, and you held onto his hands.

"....Baby I'll stay if you want me to, you don't have to be so sad," He stroked your hair and gave you a reassuring smile.

"No…" you shook your head silently chastising yourself. "Let him go," you said mentally.

"No it's ok I'll see you tomorrow" you have him the bravest smile you could.

"Ok. Maybe tomorrow when you see you were being silly I'll sleep over," he winked, walking down the hall.

You slowly shut the door and fell down the floor sobbing.

Chloe came running out of her bedroom to check on you.

"Aw honey…."

"I love him Chloe,” you sobbed. “I didn't know how much or even if I really did before today but I really love him.”

“Oh honey. I can make more right now, even a bigger batch so it'll last longer!” She offered.

NO you shook your head sternly. "That's not fair to him"

"Well….it might be,” She gave you a hopeful look.

“What are you talking about?”

“Come on,” She picked you up and dragged you to her room.

She sat you on her bed as she went and pulled an ancient looking book from her shelf. You read the cover: “The Grimoire.”

“I borrowed it from my friend Maggie,” She explained. “Basically it's a master list of spells,”

“And she just let you borrow this?” You gave her a suspicious look.

“I told her it was an emergency.”

“Really?”

“Well! It was. Of the heart. She gets it she’s an empath and a romantic,” She assured you. “Anyway!” She turned to a dog eared page.

“Read” it she instructed.

You read the page: “ ‘Emotion Magnifier’....what is this?”

“It's the spell I used on Rafael.” She smiled.

“...What?”

“It wasn't really a love spell per say,”. She explained. “Those are frowned upon in the witch community. Y'know free will and all,”

“Wait so this didn't mess with his free will?”

“No ma'am! It just magnifies whatever somebody already feels. You just have to zone in on what emotion you want to draw out. So I used amorous feelings on Rafael,”

“So...that means...what exactly…?” You wanted to make sure you understood what she was saying.

“Well since he went so insane this morning, it magnified some already pretty strong feelings for you.” She smiled

“WHAT?!”

Your mind was spinning. Had he really been telling the truth about falling in love with you the moment he saw you? Has this actually just sped up the process of your relationship? Why hasn't he ever said anything? You've never really talked. How was this possible?

"So...what you're saying is…"

"He was clearly already smitten with you darling," She grinned even bigger at you.

"Oh my god….oh my god!!!!" You squealed. Maybe...maybe those feelings would be stronger than any potion, maybe he would remember today.

You went to bed that night with a hopeful heart.

-----

[bleuberries-and-video-games]

I want to give you a bit of catharsis and say a lot of the mean spirited critiques of the 2005 movie from people who like the 1971 movie are built upon a Nostalgia that cannot come back. A lot of these people are really big fans of and really enjoy the 1971 movie for reasons that I find to be valid reasons to enjoy the 1971 movie but not valid critiques of the 2005 movie. They are not meant to crib or be parallels of each other, they are reinterpretations of the same story by different directors in different times.

One absolutely has more of Roald Dahl's voice Peak through it, and it's the later of the two, the 1971 movie has moments of that, they're the moments where the darkness and the depravity and the weirdness shines through the most, stuff like the boat ride, when Wonka does a somersault, and when he says offhanded and off color things that sound arranged. But this is contrasted by the genuine Whimsy and wonder he has, and the sort of saccharine musical veneer the whole film has, which does in fact take away from the film and its story. The 1971 film, for all of its merits, has moments that grind to a giant fucking halt because a lot of the music and the musical numbers just don't work!

The 2005 movie, if you're going for accuracy to Roald Dahl's visions for the characters and interpretations, as well as just general stylistic choices, the 71 movie may be a little more in line to what he wanted given that he was present for a lot of the filming, but ultimately didn't like the final product, whereas the 2005 movie is more in line with what he would have most likely liked. It has a lot more of Roald Dahl's specific stylistic choices, a lot of the off color humor, the in jokes, the quirky jokes, the weird jokes, the raunchy stuff that adults like about Roald Dahl and make his stories Classics for both kids and adults alike. I know this because I adore his writing style, I adore a lot of his stories, I adore a lot of what he's made as a writer, and I have very strong critiques of him as a person but find his ability to convey and make memorable stories for kids and adults alike to be an indication of a genius that quite few people actually are able to do or perform.

The 2005 movie has thematic, aesthetic, and just general portrayals that are in Total Line with what he would have wanted, or at least match what his kind of humor and stuff was. The fact that a lot of the kids are reflections of the shortcomings of their parents, in both mannerism and in portrayal is exactly what he was going for. A lot of the critiques, the ideas, the executions of the ideas match more thematically his style of writing, but if it was translated to film. I would argue this decision would be different for each story of his, which is why I think the 2005 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie, The Fantastic Mr Fox movie made by Wes anderson, and the James and the Giant Peach movie made by Peter Selleck are movies that best execute the ideas behind the stories that are being told. People can debate the different versions of matilda, the witches movies, and the upcoming Henry sugar movie, but the best interpretations of his works are the 2005 Charlie and the Chocolate factory, The Fantastic Mr Fox by Wes anderson, and the James and the Giant Peach movie that everyone knows, because they all capture the different themes and aesthetic elements of those films, the whimsy, the loftiness, the darkness, the matter of fact way that Roald Dahl talks to kids that is enjoyable to adults as well.

Some of this does shine through in the 1971 movie, but it doesn't show through nearly as much as it does or is demonstrated as much as it does in the 2005 movie. There are flawed elements, Parts where Tim Burton takes control of the story and kind of diverts attention away from the Roald Dahl Elements which creates a dissonance that a lot of people don't like, but I personally do enjoy but for different reasons, but it does add some dissonance. However it is not nearly as bad of a film as a lot of the people who love Gene Wilder and love the original movie say it is. And I think either people are softening up on it or the studio itself is filled with people who feel like they need to pay Penance for even referencing it.

The fact that there was a Willy Wonka trend in the last three years through TikTok Instagram and Twitter, as well as a violet 2005 makeup tutorial Trend in the last 3 years that wasn't capitalized upon at all by Warner Brothers indicates that there is somebody over there who is more willing to pay pendants and reference the 71 movie until the world ends then actually embrace the fact that both movies can coexist and be enjoyed by different people, because they can be, because they're both enjoyable movies with enjoyable casts and enjoyable settings and enjoyable portrayals of everything. I say that as somebody who has seen both, enjoys both, and has watched both several times.

Anyone who says negative shit about the 2005 movie simply because they like the 71 movie more needs to check their biases because it's so fucking stupid. They are not comparable because they are different interpretations of the same story, it would be like comparing one performance of Snow White to another performance of Snow White made by a different Studio or group of people, it's the same story, told by different people, they have their different merits and different likes and that is the point of it. Comparing the two is asinine. And you should feel absolutely okay enjoying the film you like, because the people who fucking hate it are wrong about hating it. There are valid critiques of both films you can make and levy, and honestly they should be levied more than the bullshit stuff I hear constantly.

The 2005 movie is a beautiful film, done very well, with a substantially minimal amount of CGI despite what a lot of 1971 fans say. Having watched both making of documentaries for both of these films, I can say for certain that a lot of people have fundamental misunderstandings of both films, and fundamental misunderstandings of the effects and efforts that went into them. They let that bias color their vision and don't actually accept alternative more likely truths, that both films were made by a group of people who loved the source material and wanted to make it the way that they could, and were Limited in different ways.

The 2005 film is the superior of the two films in terms of its accuracy to the book, the 1971 film is superior of the two films in terms of being a very specific kind of movie classic, which might as well be the most arbitrary label you can put on to it, the 2005 film is Superior in the fact that it looks good despite being 20 years old, and the original film is superior because a lot of it's messages and performances have staying power that have stood the test of time outside of the actual story they're telling. Both of these films are very specific, very distinct interpretations of the same story, and should be considered such, and you should not feel bad for enjoying these films. You should not have to worry about people not liking these films and making you feel bad for liking these films, and it is honestly the responsibility and due diligence of people talking about films to be willing and able to check their biases and if they can't do that, if they refuse to do that, that is more demonstrable of what kind of a person they are and how they approach media with bias. This film fucking rules, it's a great film, it's a wonderful film, and it's an enjoyable, and I hope honestly as time goes on, more and more people appreciate it, because it deserves to have its own fandom that is Catered to. I've seen enough Oompa Loompa lunch boxes to tell you that I would enjoy a Deep Roy lunch box every once in awhile, simply because his Oompa Loompas are just as full of character and Intrigue and it's all him all of it.

The 2005 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie is incredible. And I hope people truly begin to embrace that idea more.

As someone who has catcf 2005 as one of her fave childhood films, I am so tired of constantly having to defend it and explain how I have no nostalgia to the 70s version mainly because it was not marketed where I lived and I didn't see it until I was much older, but since I saw the 05 version as a mere 4 year old it left a big impact on me + I grew up with it dubbed so I don't have the same experience seeing it in the "original" version. So seeing videos like this just boosts my confidence x)

Like I still have to squint when I watch reviews because I am so deeply afraid they're gonna include the shot of Augustus covered in chocolate inside the pipe because that 2 second shot always gives me heart attacks, but I still feel "Yes, finally someone who is not NEGATIVE"

[amber-acrylic]

Hey sorry to bother, I don't mean this to be offensive in any way, but you're asexual, right? How come you express so much sexual attraction, especially to women? Again, I don't mean this to be disrespectful in any way, I'm genuinely curious, because I've seen other people like this and I don't really follow. I thought asexual meant no sexual attraction to any gender, so I'm a confused as to what asexual actually means. Is it really no attraction or is it no libido? And if it's no libido, then how do you even get a response from seeing the vampire lady? (which by the way, I agree 👀) Sorry again if I'm being disrespectful, I'm just genuinely curious.

You're not being offensive at all! Don't worry 🧡 There's nothing wrong with asking questions my friend. Asexuality is actually a complicated thing! Some ace people enjoy sex and even feel sexual attraction from time to time! But it's just not that 'human need' for us that it is for most people. We'd be just fine never having sex while most people need to and go through withdrawals. It's like...if you could never go hungry and starve, you might still want to eat sometimes just for the enjoyment of it, but you'd never feel like you need to eat and you'd be okay never being able to.

tbh I've never experienced sexual attraction, at least I don't think so 😅 when i talk about the Hot Vampire Milf or freak out over hot girls, it's hard to explain, but it's never in a sexual way. I make sex jokes sometimes though, which I can see would make it confusing! And that's my bad

Don't get me wrong I definitely think they're hot, but it's almost like more of an aesthetic thing, where I just want to look at them and just be amazed at how good they look lol. Sometimes I don't know how to express when I feel that way, so I make a joke that sounds a little more sexual because I feel like that's a response people would be able to understand a little bit easier. I'll make a joke about how I want lady d to throw me through a wall but if i saw any straight up porn of her I'd get VERY uncomfortable.

Honestly I think a big reason I've seemed more and more like I'm sexually attracted to people sometimes is it just feels...easier to respond that way, because it seems to make more sense to people and i don't have to explain my weird-ass feelings.

Maybe it is no libido and I just haven't figured that out yet 😅 but to clarify a long (probably confusing) rambling, I don't feel sexually attracted to the woman I gush about; I think they're ~hot~ but in a way I'm not sure how to articulate, so I make a joke or comment that might sound more sexual because I feel like that's something people would be able to understand.

It's like when you see something so cute you just don't know what to do. This lady's HOT but i don't want to bang her yet I'm feelin SOMETHIN but i don't know what and I'm overwhelmed so i just type 'wowoeowoewowowohhhh g irls' like an idiot 🤣

[prismatic-starstuff]

~

So when Astarion and Tavalin first meet, Tavalin already knows exactly what Astarion is; they ran into Gandrel first, who mentioned he was looking for a vampire spawn called Astarion, and Tav's bright enough to be able to go 'oh this guy has really pale skin and red eyes and long teeth and is called Astarion, this may well be the Astarion that guy was looking for'

(but Tavalin doesn't like monster hunters - they think it's disgusting to hurt people based solely on what they are without taking into consideration their actions or who they are - and so they're honestly more than happy to go and deal with Gandrel alongside Astarion)

And so, from almost the get-go - from a few days into their adventuring together, at least- they have an arrangement where Astarion can feed on Tavalin as much as he needs to; and oh, the first time is unbelievably enjoyable for both of them. Astarion's never fed from a thinking creature before and it's an ecstatic feeling, Tavalin loves the closeness and the intimacy of it all... and apparently virgin blood really is very sweet; turns out they've been so busy with training and fighting that they've never slept with anyone before. Astarion gives Tavalin quite a few praises for their blood, their 'cloying and intoxicating sweetness; you're practically addictive, my dear...'

Flashforward to when they are actually in a relationship; things are getting hot and heavy, clothes are gone, bodies are rubbing together and Astarion's fangs are at Tavalin's throat, and they make an offhanded joke: 'what if I don't taste as sweet for you once you take my virginity, hm?'

And Astarion smiles, and he nuzzles their neck, and he kisses their skin with more affection than he's felt for anyone in so long. 'No-one could ever taste as sweet to me as you do, darling.'

And sure enough, it's true: no matter how many times they do it, no matter how many other people he drinks from, Astarion really never has found blood that's sweeter or more delicious...

Turns out it had nothing to do with virginity, and it never really did... it had everything to do with the feelings involved: whether it's the burgeoning attraction at first, or the deep and true love that comes to grow between the two.

may I interest you in

✨an NSFW Fact✨

about Astarion and Tavalin's relationship