#they're HIS eggbois

[allastoredeer]

The Egg Bois have no one to take orders from after Sir Pentious dies. Then they see Lucifer and immediately follow him around and unlike Alastor who didn't like being tailed by the annoying yappy yokes, Lucifer is enthralled by them because they are like little ducklings forming a line as if Lucifer is their mother

One egg boi, Frank, is the only one that stuck to Alastor, and Al makes it clear he wants him to go away but Frank stays with him. One time when Al was cooking, Frank asked if he could help and Al thought for a moment, grinned, picked up the egg, and plopped him in the boiling pot. Unfortunately, Frank did not hard boil, in fact, he enjoyed the hot bath, and the rest of the egg bois ran inside as Lucifer entered the kitchen and screamed in horror at the display but the rest of the eggs hopped around Al's feet, pulling at his trousers asking to join the bubble bath.

FRANK STAYING WITH ALASTOR IS SO CUTE MY HEART JUST EXLODED

Alastor trying to boil Frank is just fogjwenweln 🤣 I can see that. The fact that it's not working AND Frank's enjoying himself AND the other eggbois want to join in makes it all so much better.

Also, the other eggbois following Lucifer around like ducklings 🥺 that's adorable.

[hazelfoureyes]

So a friend read the little gifts that I dropped for you, and her first question was: "They're in a hotel right? Aren't there other people???" You can thank her for this. Btw I'mma roll with the Smut Santa thing now ☄️❤️

"What the fuck is he doin' up there?" Angel mumbled under his breath as he climbed the steps of the hotel. "And why the FUCK am I bein' sent to shut him up? I'm a guest, not an employee in this dump!" He continued to grumble as he made his way closer to Alastor's room, but as he rounded the corner, he knew. Oh buddy, HE KNEW. There was no mistaking that familiar thumping noise of wood against drywall, and there CERTAINLY was no mistaking the cries of ecstasy that could be heard all the way at the end of the hall where Angel stood. "Huh... who knew he had it in him..." he said with a smirk as he reached for his phone, quickly looking for a way to record the sounds coming from his room. But that was before he noticed one of the other doors in the hall was cracked open. Quietly, Angel put his phone away and crept up on the cracked door, trying to figure out who might be listening in on something that had even him blushing like a school maiden.

"Ssshhut up before sssomeone hearsss you!" He heard from the other side, and instantly he knew - it was the drawn out S sound, and the hiss of his tongue darting out between his teeth that have Sir Pentious away. Angel clicked his tongue before he shoved the door open, knocking Pentious on his back and sending his notepad and pencil flying. "The fuck are you doin' in here, huh? Spyin' on the Radio Demon gettin' freaky?" Angel accused him, as if he wasn't just doing the same. "He's gonna kill ya when he- mmmhhh!" The spider demon started in on but Pentious, only to have his mouth covered and his arm nearly yanked out of its socket as Pentious pulled him into the room and cracked the door once again.

"Be quiet!" He hissed, one of his Eggbois bringing the notepad and pencil back to him. "Here ya go, boss!" The creature announced. Pentious hissed at him once again to shut up, and then returned to his spot by the door, scribbling something down as he listened to what was coming from Alastor's room. "I'm taking notesss for when I... for when..." Pentious started, suddenly becoming bashful as he attempted to explain himself. Angel stared at him, one set of arms crossed and the other placed on his hips as he waited for an explanation.

He knew, though. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that Sir Pentious had a thing for Cherri Bomb. But Pentious - being the little prude that he was (everyone was a prude to Angel... well, except Alastor, now. He made it off that list.) - quickly covered up the confession he was about to let loose. "I'm writing down everything I hear, ssso I can ussse it againssst Alassstor the next time we do battle!" He covered, flashing a toothy grin at Angel before he went back to his notes. Poor thing thought he was so clever, it was adorable.

Unimpressed, Angeldust stared at Sir Pentious' back for a few moments, trying to decide if he wanted to call him on his bullshit, help the fucker out, or use THIS against HIM later on. But then he remebered: they're supposed to be trying to redeem themselves. That was the whole point of this crapfest they've all come to call home. With a groan, Angel approached the door and yanked it open, grabbing Sir Pentious on the way out.

"Look man, he's gonna kill us both if he finds out we heard any of this." Angel griped, fighting back the urge to shudder at the slimy feel of Pentious' skin. "If ya want pointers on how to impress Cherri, I'll help ya. Just burn that notebook and don't speak about this to anyone! Capische?" It took Pentious a few moments to respond, but ultimately he agreed, slowly following behind Angeldust as they walked down the steps, his Eggbois in tow.

"Hey boss, why does the tall red guy want Y/N to say his name so bad?"

"SHUT UP FRANK!"

You

you can write every character

so well

It’s…. Unfair and upsetting and very exciting

💦

not the wood and drywall

(Smut Santa: @synamartia) 

[rain0tes]

Hi hi love your hacker reader a bit too much it's great!! What would be their reaction to sir pentious trying to join the hotel? And the little eggbois once he starts staying there for real?

Hacker!reader's reaction to Sir Pentious trying to join the hotel.

Hacker!reader actually comes in after the heaven vs. hell battle, when Pentious has already been redeemed. This is an alternate scenario where you've been in the hotel a few weeks before Pentious makes an appearance.

Warnings: mature language and jokes, mentions of violence (although nothing too explicit), all the obvious hazbin stuff

You've been at the Hazbin Hotel for a few weeks. Although not fully convinced by the idea of redemption, having a roof over your head while easing into your new life (or afterlife) was nice.

You find a friend in most of the other wayward souls in the hotel, especially Charlie, who was more than excited when you show up.

The actual story starts when Pentious comes crashing into the hotel the first time. Literally.

You were having tea with Alastor out on the balcony when you feel the ground below yourself shake.

"Show yourself, Alastor."

That earns the radio demon a side eye from you, which he only shrugs at.

You see the others go outside in your peripheral, wanting to check out what the commotion was about. You shrug and head down as well, actually using the stairs since not everyone can just warp through shadows.

You stand beside Alastor, squinting at the giant blimp as they conversed.

"When I've slain you, the almighty Vee's will finally acknowledge me as their equal."

"Ooh! Wait, who are the Vee's?"

"Aren't they that tacky trio with the crap network security?"

"They're no one important."

One beating later, Pentious is on the ground after Alastor has decimated his war-blimp...thing.

"Thanks for another forgettable experience."

"Thank...you...for letting your guard down! Haha!"

Pentious rips off a part of Alastors suit, causing you to physically wince.

"Ah, you shouldn't have done that."

You can't help but chuckle when you see him get sent flying.

"Looks like team rockets blasting off again."

You expected that to be the last time you'll be seeing of him (at least in a while), but it seems that fate has other plans when someone comes knocking on the hotels doors only six hours later.

Vaggie was the one to answer, and he almost got skewered upon sight. Charlie seemed excited that he showed up, tho, and somehow you're not surprised.

"Are you fucking nuts? This chump was trying to kill us like, literally six hours ago?"

"Yeah, exactly, are you seriously gonna let this pathetic loser live with us?"

They did, IN FACT, let the boyfailure in the hotel. You weren't too happy about it, and neither was angeldust (bonding through a common enemy).

You can't help but feel that something was odd about him, sensing an electrical device on him that was certainly not a phone. You remained quiet for the time being, if only to please Charlie by playing along with her activities (even if they did make you cringe just a tiny little bit).

You watch him slither sometime in the middle of the night, prompting you to follow him as you take a sip out of a monster energy can.

"A camera? Wow, that's pretty cheap. Certainly doesn't help my already low expectations of the Vee's"

Yeah, you caught him in the act when he was placing the camera. Angeldust already behind you, confronting Pentious while you pick up the device.

You take a screwdriver out of your pocket, disabling the thing but not damaging it, all while the two fight beside you.

Pentious immediately calls for backup once he's been outed to Vaggie and Charlie, only for Vox to laugh in his face.

"If they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself you miserable failure."

You immediately snatch the smartwatch. He may be right, Pentious certainly was a failure. But you've already decided that you're the only one who gets to insult him.

"Listen here, you musty little bitch. You either shut the fuck up or I do it for you."

He's tearing up as you throw the meanest sentences he's ever heard to Vox. Some of them even sound poetic to some degree.

"Two thousand years of constant human evolution only to make some simple minded cunt."

Immediately refers to you as his best friend after this. You waged war on an overlord of hell for him. There's no take backsies.

For once, there's someone in the hotel who's not actively looking out for you, but you're the one looking out for him instead.

You two would share ideas ALL the time.

One thing you'd accomplish together is making a clone of you. He made the android, you made the A.I it would run on.

"Would it technically be mastur-"

"Don't you dare continue that sentence."

The main difference is that the Vee's know who you are in this one. Actively waging war against them instead of remaining anonymous. All because you've decided that the weird boyloser snake is actually kind of endearing.

I might make another part to this one where the reader participates in the hell vs heaven battle.

(masterlist)

[charliewhaw]

Hazbin Hotel Talent Show

The characters come out, ready to perform in a mandatory talent show hosted by God.

Alastor plays the piano while his shadows play multiple other instruments, including but not limited to, the cello, the violin, the bass, and a drum set.

Vox can't play any instruments. But he can connect a piano into blue tooth and pump some digital ai generated music through it and pretend like he's playing.

Valentino plays the flute. Just some random ass instrument.

Husk? He's more of a cello guy.

Vaggie knows how to play the lyre, but she's not good at it. Surprisingly, she's great at the electric guitar. Adam taught her. But those are bad memories now and she avoids the instrument entirely.

Rosie plays the clarinet. Sure. That's fine. All elegant and shit. What you didn't know is she's also great at death metal drumming!

Charlie can sing screamo. Screeches the likes you've never heard!

Mimzy is a singer, of course. No instruments. Just dancing.

Niffty's got some mad skills on the triangle.

Sir Pentious plays the harpsichord (precursor to the piano).

The eggbois play a mix of bells and maracas. <- One day Pen tried to distract them with bells and maracas, and they went around the hotel making 'beautiful' music. Everyone was shouting at Pen to stop them, but he just stood in the corner, hands clasped and eyes watering at his precious eggbois.

Velvette beat boxes.

Tom Trench plays a vitar (mix between a guitar and a violin).

Katie Killjoy thinks music is a waste of time. She stands there and summarizes everyone's performances instead. They're all shit. Especially Tom's.

Lucifer and his clones come out at the end, each holding a set of bagpipes.

All in all, God regrets this mandatory talent show.

....

God asks about Alastor's furby piano once everyone is gone. After one song, God understands why Alastor got sent to Hell.

[sol-consort]

Yeah, hi me again, dragon age girl. Unfortunately I have to tell you that I think I wanna squirt straight on that bald dude's head, even though I'm 128% sure it's gonna end badly because I was watching edits of them (and accidentally spoiled myself I'm pretty sure😐) and they're all angsty so I think he's gonna betray me in some way. But oh well, I love a doomed lovers moment. I can't wait to complain and cry about it later.

"I wanna squirt straight on that bald dude's head" - Anon, 2024.

When I tell you this line alone convinced me to go install the game and try it out because there is no way boiled egg of a man could ever pull this tremendously

And oh.

Oh.

Was I wrong.

I never thought I liked assertive passive-aggressive men until now...damn. The way he so causally takes your hand and does what he does. No explanation. Eggboi kinda hot.

But then, out of the corner of my eye, I glimpsed the most amazing perfect pair of tits to ever exist, and my brain did a complete factory reset.

FORGET BALDIE BASICS I WANT HIM I WANT TO SUCK ON HIS—

God. What a big juicy personality. I bet his heart is just as massive. They're staring at me, I just can't stop looking. Don't ask me what colour anything is idk man his eyes were purple maybe uhhh milk

BUT ALSO...also there is the hot ruggish knight woman whom I want to protect me and carry me to safety in her arms <3 also let me ride her thigh, the armour stays ON during smooch sex.

Lastly, my toxic trait is that I simply cannot play a game without creating the most gorgeous barbie-esque doll of a character. Pretty ladies all around! Brown hair my beloved. I clearly have a type but shhh

LOOK AT HER MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT. My pretty doll! My bratz girlie!! A snotty noble human who's completely ignorant of the way of the world but thinks she knows it all + doesn't want to be here and would rather be back home in her privileged cushy life sipping on margaritas in pool parties, but forced to be the hero against her will. So she pretends to care and says what others want to hear.

I plan for her not to take anything seriously until the realisation of how dire this situation is, all the deaths and tragedies, make her have a change of heart and actually tries to help and save others. Becoming more jaded with time and losing that innocent naivety and arrogance.

Oh and double blade rouge bc dagger go swoosh swoosh aka she doesn't wanna carry a sword (it might break a nail) and never cared much for bows (splinters might make her fingertips calloused) and can't do magic for shit (magic?? HERESY! BURN THE WITCH NOW <- most normal aristocratic family teaching)

Sp daggers/theif bc she may or may not have used to lock pick her mother's sweets box as kid to steal candy, but we don't talk about that...or how the dress she's wearing rn is her older sister's, she took it from her closest without permission. Aka, why the blood splatters are okay with her.

[hiemaldesirae]

Swap AU:

Vox's Goetia (we need a name for him...umm because he's where Vox gets the extras for the fight against Heaven; got any ideas?) looks like a Griffin. He's got a Lion lower half and eagle upper half but his colors are shades of blue. (You see why Vox proposed that deal.)

The crew work on defense for days. Vox goes to Lucifer to ask about Angel weaknesses and informs him about Adam's threats against Charlie and the Hotel, and that's how the hotel crew gets informed of angel weaknesses. Lucifer tells, after all why should he keep Heaven's weakness a secret when they're coming for his daughter?

Vox then puts a big order of Angelic steel in for Carmine, paying extra to have it arrive early, which it does so he and Pentious can build turrets and drones to shoot down the exterminators. They have a blast.

Also: fun facts:

Vox's sensors and subconscious relax and recognize Alastor's scent as safe, even though Vox himself cannot smell anything. The sensor's database has recognized certain scents as family (Husk's, Vel's, Val's) lover's/husband's (Alastor's) little sister (Charlie's) my duck loving liege lord who might be my friend too? (Lucifer) the crazy exorcist chick whose now treating me with kid gloves--IT WAS ONE PANIC ATTACK! (Vaggie) Val's weird Spider who keeps taking photos and I know is stealing my shit (Angel Dust) The Best Little Engineer That Could (Sir Pentious) The Engineer's less then steller sidekicks 1-8 (Eggbois) the chick that keeps blowing up the wall (Cherri Bomb)

Angel Dust does do more then steal. He brings in Alastor's cooking to the Hotel, and Vox who does miss homemade jambalaya jumps at the chance to eat it. Vox just devours it. (Of course Angel lied and told him it was set aside for Niffty and Velvette for working so hard. He wasn't going to tell him Alastor had been waiting at the door of V-tower with the large Tupperware bowl with strict instructions that only Vox got what was inside.)

Vox actually turns in early--he'd been stressing out with Adam's threat laying over him and the thought of a true death coming for him hasn't sat well, but the warmth of good food made him sleepy and he goes to bed. He's barely asleep when Alastor joins him, gently petting his rabbit ears and murmuring his undying devotion to sleeping Vox's ears.

uhhh. drawing from the demons of the ars goetia grimoire, seir could work as a name? according to his description, seir can go to any place on earth in a matter of seconds to accomplish the will of the conjurer (possibly explaining how vox can use him for errands and such), and hes not a particularly evil demon. he's also a prince of hell, so that makes his and stolas' relation even closer since there seems to be only 7 of them in the ars goetia grimore

HAHAHA awww bonding time with pentious and vox!!! i still stand by the fact that i think vox should get to say kys to at least ONE other person in the swap au. i simply believe my wife should be allowed to cyberbully whoever he wants <3 also i imagine lucifer would show up to help with fortifications too, no? i just cant see him leaving his daughter and friend alone to deal with the fallout while not leaving the palace... though admittedly, i am a bit biased from what electric mentioned.

me after i die. HE STILL RECOGNIZES AL AS HIS LOVER...... auwgudawgh...... imgonna be SICK. what the HELL did they even fight about because clearly it wasnt enough to keep both of them from pining for each other... AUAUWGAHAH every time you come in my inbox its like another plane (angst( striking the twin towers (my heart)

and i am SUCH a fucking sucker for radiostatics love language being food. the idea that al nabs / has angel nab voxs stuff so that he can stake his claim but he also makes him food.... just stop being cryptic and TELL HIM YOUR SHIT !!! god i hate them. dysfunctional ass toxic couple theyre the WORST. and al. please for the love of god just be a Normal Person and STOP BREAKING INTO VOXS BED AT NIGHt ?!!?!?? just one normal thing from you. god damn its like if he doesnt act like a freak he loses 20 years off his lifespan or something

[1zazadud0chka1]

Hi again!!! Came back with some lore for yall!!

On this time we got Vigilante (designed by @quackkryak <3) who takes a spot of Sir Pentious! In our au he have his own farm, which he's got from his grandpa. But he got in hell kinda accidentally?? when Vigilante was alive, he shoot a criminal and welp…welcome to hell lil bro

He's a good guy actually, and stands for justice even in hell.He does NOT like all the stuff that happening in Pizzatower, and would hit Pizzahead if he could tbh. That's why Vigilante easily talks to Noisette and comes to her cafe often!! Unlike Pepperman, while Vigilante is in fine terms with him, Noisette otherwise ugggh…..well lets say it's not positive from Noisette's side.

Btw, eggbois in this au are cheeseslime guys,but they're bulls just like Vigi :3 (desing was made by the same person as Vigi btw!!)

[xxx-sir-pentious-xxx]

I imagine if sir Pentious lost his eggbois due to Alastors negligence itd go something like

Pentious: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY JUST GOT BROKEN!!??

Alastor: Its not my fault your stupid pets couldnt stay where I told them to be.

Pentious: *shaking with anger and tries to be stable over it* They required basic fucking care, HOW could you just leave them alone..

Alastor: Oh are you gonna cry? They're just stupid eggs you can just make more.

Pentious: *has begun to cry and everyone misunderstands how truly angry he is.*

Vaggie: *with Charlie tries to console him while Charlie chews out Alastor.*

Pentious: *glances at Vaggie's spear* They were like my babies... they were my companions-

Alastor: *turns back to him* And you'll make more why dont you just-

Pentious: *steals the spear and throws it through Alastors head at lightening speed.*

*Alastor thumps into floor like dead weight with a spear through his head.*

[beevean]

Sonegg and Stobotnik

Sonegg:

My least problematic of my problematic ships :P once you get past the fact that Eggman yearns to atomize that hedgehog and Sonic couldn't live less of a shit if the eggboi lives or dies, they're pretty equal :P

Anyway, very much into the parallels, how they are ideologically polar opposites but have many traits in common, how theirs is the oldest relationship in the whole series. I think they get each other like no one else does, it's just that they'd rather die than concede anything to the other :P

also,

it may not be canon, canon, but it's still canon

Stobotnik:

if they don't kiss sloppy style in the third movie i'm not gonna watch it :(

like. it's canon. Agent Stone is down bad for his boss. Villain/simp is always enjoyable and I'm glad Stone is funny enough to have a cute dynamic with Jimbotnik lol. it's the staregg we deserved

[themetalvirus]

uhh its like

- eggman takes the two redeemed eggboys back to his lair to be brainwashed

- he gets impatient and announces to the world that he's resetting the universe in a week

- also he has all the chaos emeralds and all the super emeralds and he steals the master emerald as the week is going (knuckles mad)

- meanwhile silver is getting clockwork oranged and eggman has shadow in The Tube and is cutting out his memories one at a time

- amy is freaking out

- tails is freaking out

- knuckles is mad about the master emerald and also freaking out

- they all finally find where he's keeping the emeralds and the boys after an overly excited sonic gets sloppy and leads them right to it RIGHT on the final day

- they manage to free both of the boys (theyre okay and shadow has his memories idk the specifics yet leave me alone). they cry a lot and then start to help with recovering the emeralds before all of them get caught and captured again

- eggman declares the defected boys a loss cause

- eggman decides to show off and keeps them in the chamber with all the emeralds and sonic walks in all dramatic and excited

- everyones struggling to escape their binds but its too late and sonic implodes the universe with the power of all the emeralds

- they end up all going hyper (as in team rose and shadow + silver) from the residual gigantic mega wave of chaos energy, resulting in them surviving and being invincible in the void with sonic (eggman is also being kept somewhere "safe" by sonic and they never actually see him in the void)

- the emeralds turn thoughts into power. their thoughts and memories are all gargled and floating around in physical fragments (like a chunk of forest or a master emerald shrine or a hallway of eggman's lair or something) and they have to dowse for sonic by finding his memories among their own. and by watching where he tries to put up structures before they wobble and collapse because the will of the good guys is overpowering his will to rewrite the universe

- they find sonic. turns out sonic was looking for them too. he tries to kill them but they're invincible

- they need to talk him down from destroying the universe

- amy just asking him "is this what you wanted? are you happy? does eggman love you? his memories are here too - look at them and tell me if this changes something, that he loves you"

- he does. eggman doesn't love him.

- his brothers' memories show up around him. they love him.

- sonic breaks down and says he'd miss them. he can't go through with it. everybody's super timer runs out, and the world as it was floomps back into reality all at once, and sonic is clinging to his brothers and crying loud enough to cut through the air like a knife

- eggman stands up from the rubble of his lair, leveled by the amount of energy sonic put out. sonic sees him, and everyone holds their breath as he decides what to do.

- he crawls back to eggman. he begs for forgiveness. he begs for eggman not to kill him. he'll do it next time, he promises, he's so sorry he couldn't do it, he's so sorry...

- eggman scoops him up in his arms, rubs his back in an attempt to soothe him, and says they'll get rid of these failures and simpletons some other time. sonic is not comforted. he walks away. amy and the rest don't stop him - they have an emerald-related mess to clean up. and their chests feel hollow.

vibrating from finally putting together something coherent for the ending of egghogs instead of it just being a bunch of nonsense but its STILL mostly nonsense just a little bit more structured

[hazbinmo-tel]

Do you have any Pentlie (Charlie x Pentious) headcannons?

Sorry for getting to this late, anon! I was away from my computer for the weekend and this would all be hard to type on my phone lmao

BUT I SURE DO. Like the others this is also hammered out with @sluttycrimehat

They know each other! Pentious is described as 'notable kingpin' and she's the princess of Hell-- Coupled with how long Pen has been around and most likely attempting takeovers, I'm fairly certain Charlie and Pentious are aware of each other and have a somewhat...Friendly-ish relationship. Especially given with how she smiles at him in the pilot when he appears

She totally recognizes him!

I feel like they'd also have some stuff in common, particularly in how neither of them are really taken seriously, as far as their goals are concerned. Charlie wants to help people, Pentious wants to be an overlord or take over Hell, and nobody really gives a shit about either of those aspirations if they're not outright mocking them.

That said, I dooooooo think Charlie would be trying to coax Pen away from those aspirations, both for his own sake, and because she simply Cannot understand why he's so determined to keep trying and getting the attention and respect of people that he doesn't like/respect, and who don't like/respect him. I imagine this causes an argument or two.

Pen would definitely struggle not to use honorifics with Charlie. Lots of "Princess" and "My Lady", because he is a gentleman, and she is a princess, and he can and will respect that dammit. Charlie tells him often just to call her by her name.

He's very resistant to actually joining the Hotel, but Charlie invites him to come over whenever he wants... And he does! To see her. Angel takes advantage of this to pick on him.

The eggbois REALLY like Charlie, and she thinks they're pretty damn cute too.

They sing together! Pen has 0 qualms about being flamboyant and is more than happy to sing and dance with her.... If he's not busy.

She starts having tea around in the kitchen for him.

[nuttyrabbit]

I'm thinking the same. Maybe Eggboy sended Sonic to a different timeline/dimension where he rules (ie. he destroys everything) and now it's up to the sonics to stop him and save the future, present, and past. On the other hand, I hope this doesn't mean all of Sonic's friends are dead 'cause i'm hoping they're the "resitance" and i really wanna see them again.

SAME THO. What if Eggman pulled an Akh and Sonic’s friends are fighting in his place?

[hiemaldesirae]

Swap AU:

Vox's Goetia does join the Hazbin hotel. He takes what was Husk's canon job, as Husk has a casino to run and his parents think it's a good thing for their son to work for the Princess. (Even if they don't believe in her redemption plan. And he is the spare's spare, so it's not like they have any idea what to do with him. Having his and his children's souls permanently bound to the media overlord might do him some good. (Vox stipulated that into his contract. So he'll eventually have numerous goetia souls bound to him.)

Since Alastor was up to his antics during the overlord meeting and sir Pentious has been on his best behavior (after Charlie asked Vox to talk to Pentious about things, and Vox talked to him about building stuff in the lab outside the hotel he never got the Eggbois taken away) the hotel crew doesn't know how to hurt angels/heavenborn. They know Carmilla killed the Angel--Husk caught her reaction to Him bringing out the head, after all. (He also caught Alastor's reaction to Zestial saying that they'd probably go after the Hotel first--not that he'd tell Vox. But he'd seen how furious and fearful the stag had looked at those words.) So they're debating on who to send over to the carmine/Zestial mansion. It's dangerous ground over there, after all.

Angel Dust steals more of Vox's clothes (and doesn't get caught) to make up for the set Charlie destroyed. He also gets away with one of Vox's shark plushies, which irritates Vox as it's the one with heating pad function in it that he uses for his cramps/neck pain/back pain. (Alastor rubs his scent all over the plush, before he returns it that night laying it beside Vox.)

Vox writes an entire speech for Charlie and Vaggie for their meeting up in Heaven. He's listened to Vaggie (and Lucifer's) descriptions of Adam and Lute and has given his best advice to the two for them. Unfortunately the meeting pretty much goes the same way, except that Charlie managed to get Adam pissed at Vox? So that's cool. Nothing like having the first man wanting you dead, right?

Vox drinks himself into a stupor that night. While, yes he's afraid of Alastor--the MAIN THING he is desperately, desperately trying to avoid is permanently dying. He doesn't want to die. At all. That's why he too the deal with Lucifer. Now he's gotta figure out more ways to help Charlie so he can gain more power so he can fight off Adam himself? Or at least beat him back enough so that Lucifer can arrive to kill him or Charlie can kill him or something. He doesn't know. Vox collapses into his bed that night, and passes out not noticing the radio demon stepping out of the shadows and joining him in the bed and curling around him.

swap nonny i may have to rename you to sadist nonny at this point. Why are you like this /affectionate

the stuff with the goetia is sooo silly. love that little bird thing even though ive no clue what the hell he would look like or even do at all honestly! hope he has fun trying to bartend (and hoo boy thatd probably be a big scandal, wouldnt it, having a goetian prince bartend at princess charlie's hotel...) for a bunch of idiot sinners lmao

al overhearing carmilla and zestial talking about the newly pushed forward extermination and immediately jumping to think about vox... he cant lose him AGAIN so soon after hes found him once more so after that his shadow sticks even closer to vox, and vox finds that sometimes when he passes out from working too much without taking a break that he wakes up in the morning with a fluffy blanket and food placed in front of him. he assumes its husk but when he asks, the other overlord denies it

LMFAOOO i can imagine angel sweating when vox storms downstairs in a frenzy going 'where the FUCK is my shark'. husk turns to look at him very slowly and just raises a singular eyebrow at him and angel shrugs very slowly. alastor returning the plush with his scent all over.... orugh. vox probably cant even smell it really, but for some reason his processors ingest the scent easily and he falls asleep better than ever for the first time in seven years.... </3 AUgh my heart...

and seriously. alastor you are SUCH a freak what the FUCK are you doing.... going to have to tag noncon cuddling at one point on madmans vice istg :sob:. i love them so much ugrh. swap radiostatic save me swap radiostatic

[green-armadilloette]

#I saw a post about the eggbois forcefully adopting Alastor as their new “boss” after Sir Pentious dies

#and I think about that a lot

#Like they automatically flock to him because they're confused about where Pentious went

#they have no one to direct them

#and the last person who they did take orders from was Alastor

#so they went straight to him

#I think about it so much I'm actually considering writing a little one-shot about it

#where Alastor is annoyed at first

#but he grows kind of fond of them over time

#they're like a bunch of little Niffty's but there's multiple of them and they don't have all of her feral gremlin energy

#and ANGST TWIST

#Alastor gets used to their presence and enjoys having them around

#and then Heaven finds a way to get them back to Sir Pentious

#but Alastor doesn't want them to go now

#they're HIS eggbois

#if Pentious wanted to keep them then maybe he shouldn't have died

#huh?? did they ever think of that???

#of course they didn't

#lol

#i love this

via allastoredeer

The Egg Bois have no one to take orders from after Sir Pentious dies. Then they see Lucifer and immediately follow him around and unlike Alastor who didn't like being tailed by the annoying yappy yokes, Lucifer is enthralled by them because they are like little ducklings forming a line as if Lucifer is their mother

One egg boi, Frank, is the only one that stuck to Alastor, and Al makes it clear he wants him to go away but Frank stays with him. One time when Al was cooking, Frank asked if he could help and Al thought for a moment, grinned, picked up the egg, and plopped him in the boiling pot. Unfortunately, Frank did not hard boil, in fact, he enjoyed the hot bath, and the rest of the egg bois ran inside as Lucifer entered the kitchen and screamed in horror at the display but the rest of the eggs hopped around Al's feet, pulling at his trousers asking to join the bubble bath.

FRANK STAYING WITH ALASTOR IS SO CUTE MY HEART JUST EXLODED

Alastor trying to boil Frank is just fogjwenweln 🤣 I can see that. The fact that it's not working AND Frank's enjoying himself AND the other eggbois want to join in makes it all so much better.

Also, the other eggbois following Lucifer around like ducklings 🥺 that's adorable.