#they'll laugh at me so hard probably (affectionate)

[ayakashibackstreet]

(dabs) I did way better in class today, also we finished ten minutes early because we go through the material way too fast when it's just me

[unconventional-lawnchair]

Hehehehe okay so what if you like wrote a fic about remus lupin x reader. The reader is a teacher (preferably like astronomy) and they're sneaking around together. students are making bets and stuff to see if they'll end up together, some girls just ship them really hard.

They're trying so hard to keep it a secret but they are so bad at it.

Me @ every guy who isn't a fictional wizard from the 70s ^^

An: This fluff attempt goes out to you, rip

Rumors

Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader

cw: A lot of kisses and cursing, stapler mishandling

Masterlist

WC:4181

The halls of Hogwarts were filled with hushed whispers and mindless patter of gossip. The newest topic of the year? 

Professor {L/N}, the newest astronomy hire. An Alchemist who perfected her work through star charting. Lupin had recommended you for the post to assist Sinistra. Mostly, however, you were hired on to assist with the newest project under Dumbledore. With your studies in the North Pole, you were tasked with on and off communications with the centaur herd within the Forbidden Forest. Specifically, their astronomy masters. It was easy, given your track record with magical creatures. Creating a bridge of mutual understanding between the professors and the herd. Dumbledore also saw you valuable to both potions and alchemy class; meaning you met a lot of students very fast.

So almost everyone knew you, you ran a tight ship in class, playful and respectful to the students paired with a charming personality, no one could bring themselves to even hate you.

That's probably how the rumors began, truthfully. Who doesn't want their two favorite teachers to end up together?

Much like Lupin, the students adored you. Hermione especially, after learning of your academic achievements of the past, while being a muggleborn witch. 

Your first reaction to seeing him probably don't help. First few steps into your new place of employment and you hurry over to the only face you cared to recognize, and give him a hug and a thank you for the recommendation. 

It wasn't anything big and it wasn't anything of a spectacle, but Merlin, was Hogwarts boring. The thrill of gossip seemed to have every student in a choke hold. Some said you were both childhood friends turned lovers, some said you were married and it was a scandalous affair, most of the rumors were just students talking about how perfect you both fit together. 

Your caring, funny, and nurturing behavior, to his stern more rugged form of bonding, you were affectionately dubbed ‘mum and dad.’ 

Never to your face however, and mostly by the first and seventh years. Something about growing shame and losing it in your final days of Hogwarts, remarkable.

~~~

“I'm telling you! He looks at her like she is the very stars she teaches us about!” A seventh year sighed dreamily with her friends. She had her chin in her palms and was staring up at the front of class while a few of their classmates took the practical exam. “I wish someone would look at me like that.”

“Really! I haven't seen so much tension between two faculty before! I wouldn't be surprised to find them snogging in the halls!” One of them joked and the other girls laughed.

“Truly, but I saw Professor {L/N} wearing a wedding ring. She took it off and put it in her pocket before class started. I wonder if they are, you know~ Never have I seen Professor Lupin wear one.” She wiggled her eyebrows and the original girl spoke up with a gasp.

“Oh don't you say that! Professor Lupin and Professor {L/N} would never!” She tutted and another voice chimed in, a boy from a seat behind them, making the three turn.

“I heard that they spent Christmas at school together.” Cedric cheeked and the three girls gasped and began to murmur among themselves about it, before Lupin clapped his hands.

He found it a bit amusing, he had let them continue that far. This is what his classes have become, listening to the students muttering about him and you, seeing how close they could possibly get to the truth. Remus, at a fault, was a gossip. He learned to love the thrill of rumors from Sirius and James, but what was better than rumors about you and a colleague? Rumors about you and a colleague that were so close to the truth.

“Right now! Who's next?”

The rest of the class went smoothly, everyone finished their exams and the classroom began to file out. As Lupin got comfortable in his seat, his door peaked open.

“If you are here for tutoring, please note my hours are posted on the door, this first hour has been reserved already.” Lupin called out from his chair, head leaned back. 

“Tutoring, hm?” A song-like voice rang out from the door. He slowly smirked and leaned forward, eyes locking onto yours. You were holding a box of Merlin knows what, walking straight up to his desk with that beautiful smile. 

“Is that so unbelievable?” He teased, voice lower as he stood up and walked around his desk. Looking over your shoulder to peek into the box, seeing several random objects, including a stapler, a retractable ruler, a metal pointing stick, and other random muggle things.

“Oh, totally. I think I remember you almost lost it when Peter asked for your notes.” You teased him and he chuckled, his breath brushing against your neck. He admired the way you seemed to not flinch, but melt into his proximity. 

“Peter was a terrible student.” He mumbled and you laughed, his hand slipping around your waist and leaning down to kiss the side of your neck. You laughed harder and squirmed away. 

“Hands to yourself. Now, show me where I can hide this contraband.” You lifted the box and shook it a bit. “The things they allow in muggle schools! Hmph!” You mused and he laughed, walking you up to his office and to the far back near a storage closet. He opened the door for you and you set the box down, looking around curiously.

The room was small, but big enough for four people to stand in it comfortably. The walls were covered in shelves filled with items from all over the school years, you ran your finger along one of the shelves and let the dust collect.

“What's on your mind, hm?” Lupin mused and you turned to smirk at him.

“Just wondering where they are hiding the really bad stuff. Still in Filtch’s closet?” You hummed as he stepped into the small room with you. His eyes looked you over and you gave him a look.

“Why's that, darling?”

“Just curious, out of all the things in that closet,” You hummed as Remus wrapped his arms around your middle and pulled you against him. Your fingers dancing along his shirt collar. “Wonder how many of them were from you and that little gang of yours.” You hummed and he laughed.

Leaning down, he pressed his lips to yours. It was chaste and sweet. He loved moments like this, away from everyone, where he could love you properly. He gave a hum as you got on your toes and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him down as he pulled you closer.

~~~

“I truly don't  think they have something going on. It's maddening really! The whole school seems to see it but me!” Ron groaned as he walked down the hall with Harry and Hermione, seemingly offended at the idea that the new Astronomy teacher was dating or even had interest in Lupin.

"I wouldn't put too much stock in rumors about someone's love life, Ronald," Hermione retorted, rolling her eyes.

“Yeah, sorry Ron, but you're kind of…” Harry rolled his wrists and Ron narrowed his eyes.

“Kind of what?” 

“Kind of..” Harry trailed off.

“Kind of a complete idiot when it comes to love.” Hermione finally snapped, hugging her books to her chest. “Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to meet Professor Lupin.” She huffed and stomped off.

Ron was left standing there like an idiot, looking over at Harry. 

“What did I do?”

Harry tried to hide his smile and patted Ron's shoulder to urge him along and out of the halls.

~~~

The kiss had grown a bit heated, Remus pushed you deeper into the closet as he muttered about how badly he needed to have you in his arms. How much he loved you, how he wanted you closer, so impossibly close.

You, of course, returned the sentiment. He was made for your hands it seemed, every moment he wasn't between them made you yearn for just another hour of listless cuddles or moments like this. Sneaking away from responsibilities to show your love and devotion to one another. 

If only it could last longer-

“Professor Lupin?” Hermione's voice called out into his office. Remus cursed and you quickly stumbled back. He cleared his throat, shuffling through the confiscated objects, to find anything he could snag. 

“I'll be out in a moment!” He called back as you fixed his tie and ruffled shirt, he grabbed the first thing he spotted and stole another quick kiss from you before leaving the room.

You leaned against a shelf and watched from the crack of the door in amusement as Lupin hurried to his desk.

“Ms. Granger, I am terribly sorry, is it possible for us to reschedule?” Remus pressed and looked at what he had in his hand.

A stapler.

Why on earth did he grab a stapler?

Quickly he sat at his desk and pulled out a few assignments. Grabbing some he had already graded and began to staple them together. 

Hermione was no fool and he knew that, she stared at him in bewilderment, slowly putting her hands on her books tighter. “Uhm, Professor? Isn't that the stapler Professor {L/N} confiscated from Creevey?” 

Lupin began to staple things a bit quicker, waving her off. 

“Yes, Ms. Granger, I think it would be, but I did borrow it from the confiscated,” He weaned on, collected and poised, a bit too good at putting up a face. Everytime you two have almost been caught, he's shown this side. 

“Why would you possibly need a stapler?” He asked in disbelief.

“To.. staple?” He lifted his eyebrow at her. “I do appreciate your curiosity, but I assure you this is none of your concern.” He spoke idley, having opened the stapler and pressed the top down against the pages and his table. Hermione seemed appalled at the misuse. 

“Now, if you'll please allow me to pick another time-” Before he could finish his statement, he attempted to raise his hand, only for his wrist to be locked in place. He looked down, just to see he had stapled his own sleeve to the desk under a few pages of paper. 

You had to cover your mouth and so did Hermione.

“Uhm, on second thought, sir, I think I'll spend my study hour in the library.” She slowly smirked, turning to briskly walk away.

Remus slowly sunk his face into his hands, the second his classroom door was closed he waved his hand to shut his office door. Only for the room to be filled with your laughter.

You walked out of the room, holding your sides as Lupin lost his front and stared at you with flushed cheeks.

“Not a word-”

“No! No please!” You wheezed out. “Several! Several words must be had!” You doubled over his desk, struggling to get the staple from his sleeves, when you finally managed, you were throwing your head back absolutely lost in boisterous laughter.

Remus wasn't even mad. How could he be? You looked so damn happy. So giddy with joy at the embarrassing show he put on. Quickly, he stood, walking around his desk with a purpose and grabbed your cheeks. You were still struggling to catch your breath as he playfully scoffed at you.

“Not very polite, Professor {L/N}.” He taunted and you grabbed his biceps and clung to him to try and clam down. It didn't help when he leaned down and began to pepper kisses all over your hot face. 

“Mercy!” You wheezed and he shook his head.

“What happened to all those words, Professor?” He teased and you shook your head, giggling as he absolutely mawled you with his lips.

~~~

The Grandhall was lively with the buzz of Sirius Black’s attacks. Managing to get into the Gryffindors’ common room was a feat that bewildered everyone.

However, what everyone was truly talking about was how he broke into the astronomy tower and Professor {L/N}’s office. It had managed to get out that Sirius Black himself left you a note that Dumbledore promptly confiscated. More accurately, the conversation was about how unbothered you were about the news.

That, and how a certain professor reacted to that news. 

He had gone down to the commons with McGonagall to check on Harry and the other students. Only when Flitwick came up in a rush and announced the break in and how you were nowhere to be found, the students watched in horror and shock as Lupin pulled his wand and ran from the towers at a speed they couldn't determine was truly human.

He found you soon after, running down the hall towards the Gryffindor tower, also looking for Harry. He stopped and pulled you into a tight hold no one could see. You were confused at first, but you eventually melted into him. You two were spied on by none other than Colin Creevey, who snapped a photo and was showing it around the lunch table. 

“See! I knew it! What a romantic! Ran straight to her in the face of danger?” One of the seventh years swooned and Ron scoffed.

“I don't get it, it's just two people hugging.” He mumbled and began to poke at his food, the twins giving each other a look before they rushed to tease Ron.

“Two people hugging,” Fred started.

“Hands below the waist!” George chimed in, holding up the photo as if to emphasize his point, gesturing to where Lupin's hands were holding you so tight your heels were slightly off the ground.

“Oh, how scandalous.” Fred concurred and Ron rolled his eyes.

“I hug Hermione, does that make us secretly married?” Ron pushed and Hermione quickly looked down at her book in a slight flush. 

“You wish.” George snickered and Fred clapped his hand on Ron's back, making him cough on his potatoes.

“Really, Ronald dearest, you wouldn't know the difference. You hardly know how to hold a girl now.” He teased and George nodded along.

“You'll get there one day, brother. For now you'll have to trust us.”

“This,” They both pointed this time.

“Is not a normal hug.” Both of them spoke at the same time.

Angelica finally spoke up. “Given the context, that man is whipped. Even if nothing is happening now, he is so in love it's humbling.” She got up and gathered her Quidditch gear.

“Come on boys.”

“Right behind you.” Fred purred and earned himself a look from her over her shoulder, George laughed as the three of them hurried off. Leaving the photo for Ginny to pick up.

“Oh yeah, there is absolutely no platonic explanation for this.” She hummed and tossed it to the center of the table, Neville shrugged, no wanting to contribute. 

“I think that whatever is happening between those two, it's clear they care about each other.” Hermione hummed and Harry finally agreed. Suddenly, he looked at his friends with a look of absolute mischief.

“Do you know how we can find out?” He mused and Hermione gave a groan and Ron shot up in his seat.

“How?”

Harry smirked and pulled out the map the twins had gifted him, showing it off to his friends with a cocky smirk. You had caught him with it days ago, and simply zipped your lips and walked away.

“If they are meeting anywhere, it's likely the astronomy tower.”

~~~

Now.. the plan didn't go exactly as planned.

“And I simply can not comprehend how all three of you continue to be the only Gryffindors I've had to reprimand this year!” Lupin’s voice filled the otherwise silent and empty Defense Against The Dark Arts classroom. Unfortunately for the trio, who were out far past curfew, Lupin just so happened to be on his way to the Astronomy tower when he spotted them seemingly just on time for his arrival.

“What about my brothers?” Ron muttered before Hermione shot him a look, elbow jabbing his side.

“Ronald.” She hissed.

The entirety of Hogwarts Valley had been buzzing with the news of Sirius Black’s newest escapade into the castle and Lupin could not comprehend why the three thought it was a good idea to do everything but what they were told. 

“Safety comes first and for me to find you lot outside of your dorms with a murder on the loose? With this bloody-” Lupin began to lift the map before his eyes snapped up at the sound of his door opening. He quickly shut his mouth when he saw you peak into the dark space.

“Remus?” You called out, before you paused and stared at the four infront of you. Your mind firing off a million excuses in quick succession. “Oh, I was unaware you had company.”

Lupin sighed and rubbed his face, seeming to untangle himself from the thralls of his anger. It wasn't uncommon for you two to find eachother late at night like this, but was certainly not the greatest idea of his yet- reprimanding the trio when he knew you'd be coming. As you always did when he didn't meet you at the Astronomy tower as promised. His favorite part of the end of a stressful day was a night full of whispers, stories and playful remarks. Reminiscing on your school years while recreating some memories long forgotten after the war. This time, not in his dorm, but his office or your room. “It's quite alright. I can still review your lesson plans.”

He was a terrifyingly good liar. That should not be attractive.

“Right. I will be in your office, Lupin.” You remarked and began to walk past the group of three who looked at you like you might save them. Sorry kiddos- he was grumpy enough as it was. 

You gave them a grimace, glancing at the map before quickly looking away with wide eyes and hurrying over to the office. Lupin caught the look and held up his hand. “Stop.”

You squeezed your eyes shut and slowly turned to face him. Giving him your adorable nervous look that you knew didn't work on him- well, you tried.

He made a come hither motion and you walked over, ready to be lectured like the kids beside you. He held up the map and you gave a nervous smile. 

“What? However, did you find this, Harry? This is supposed to be in Flinch’s office!” You gave the worst and most unbelievable fake disappointed tone, hands on your hips and frowning down at the three. You struggled not to smile as Harry gave a small one, before laughing a bit. Hermione covered her face in a mix of fluster and secondhand embarrassment. Ron was grinning ear to ear. 

“{L/N}...” Lupin warned and you huffed.

“You got me in trouble with the big boss here, Harry.” You teased and he finally cracked his lips into a brighter smile. You looked back at Remus and slowly interlocked your fingers in front of your lips, as if it did anything to hide your face. “In my defense-”

“You three are dismissed.” He mused quickly and slammed the paper on the table beside him. You tried your best to hide your smile. It was hard to take him seriously when you have seen him panic and staple his sleeve to a desk. The trio hurried to shuffle out, Harry sent you a greatful look and you simply winked at him. Something Remus rolled his eyes at.

“Did you see Harry with the map?” He asked in a stern tone when the kids left. You looked away and tried to look a little regretful. 

“It's very possible.” 

“And you didn't think to take it?” He asked in an incredulous tone.

“I mean, it certainly crossed my mind.” You slowly stopped hiding your smile and looked back to the taller man who was taking a few steps into your space.

“And you didn't?” He pushed.

“Well, in all fairness, Rem. It is technically his.” You snarked back finally and Remus gave a bitter laugh. 

“Professor {L/N}, did you think that maybe if this map fell into the wrong hands it could cause a serious danger to Harry?” He pushed and you clicked your tongue. You knew who he was talking about. A conversation you've had a million times, well, more an argument. It got worse when he heard of the note.

He was so willing to believe Sirius Black to be a killer, while you believed Sirius could bring himself to the point of ending someone's life, James Potter was more than a human to him. Even with his plea of guilty, you couldn't believe it. James, Lily, and Harry? You would stake your life on it. He was innocent.

It was what you were looking for, an explanation, hopefully that was what the note was for. But unlike your communications with the magical creatures of the forest, Dumbledore was not so willing to give up information when he had it. The old prick-

“I hate when we talk about this.” You huffed in honesty and leaned back on one of the desks of the room. He sighed through his nose and pinched the bridge that connected it to his forehead. “Honey-”

“Ah ah ah! Honey is for marriage.” You mused and he did his best to fight the smile growing on his face. Easily letting you steer the conversation from his own negative thoughts, he hated being upset around you. “That so?”

“It's very so. More so than most so’s.” You hummed and he blinked a few times at you before he couldn't help but smirk. 

“Give me my mother's ring back then.” He mused and held out his hand. You have a faux gasp. 

“Excuse you, sir. I seem to remember your mother telling you this belonged to me.” 

“When we were 18!” He challenged, letting himself fall victim to your antics. Like school children. “And last I checked, your reaction was less then pleasant.”

“We had been dating for a year and I was going to the North Pole in my defense, tart boy.” You scoffed and cringed at the memory. How you practically fall out of your chair when Hope made a comment about her ring. 

“Tart boy?”

“Tart boy.”

“I'll show you a tart boy.” He scoffed and took your cheeks. You giggled like a goofball, grabbing his lapels and trying to pull him closer. He smirked at you and kept his distance.

“Remus-” You huffed and glared at him a bit. His smirk only grew as he reached into your pocket, pulling out the modest gem. You rolled your eyes fondly and held out your hand for him, he slipped the ring back in its rightful place.

“Sorry, call me old fashioned. But I'd like to kiss my fiancé, not my coworker.” He teased and you couldn't help but laugh. 

“You absolute sap.”

“Hard not to be.” He mumbled and leaned in, finally kissing you. Both your eyelids lowered but he held eye contact. So much affection bumbling in your chests, it was too much to look away. Eventually, you gave into your shyness, closing your eyes. He slowly pushed your knees apart and slipped between them, making your face grow hot.

He pulled away at this and you huffed, he smirked at you when you looked back up at him. “Hey, sir, your lips on mine again. It's a marital duty and all that jazz.”

“Thought we had to be married for marital privileges, honey?” 

“Oh don't use anything I say around you against me, I can hardly think.”

He bellowed out a laugh at your mischievous look up at him. Slowly biting your lip as you struggled to keep your confident act up.

“Whatever will I do with you, {L/N}?”

“Well, I have a few ideas.” You hummed and began to fiddle with his tie. He curled an eyebrow and you looked forward, looking up at his hazel eyes with a playful pout. “Kiss me again. I promise, you keep my lips occupied, no more bad behavior.”

“Because you won't be able to talk?” 

“Precisely.”

“What in the world!?” You suddenly heard from the far corner of the room. Your face filled with shock and snapped over to see an empty corner, you could of sworn you heard Ronald just a moment ago.

 Remus quickly moved from between your legs and waved his wand, yanking off the invisibility cloak to reveal an appalled Ron, a delighted Harry, and a flustered Hermione.

“Bloody hell!” Remus boomed and you covered your mouth and looked away. Doing your best not to laugh.

“Yes, mum and dad do kiss when the kids are away.” You cheeked and Remus looked at you like you had just made some grand offense to his ears.

Hermione giggled and Harry’s smile grew ten fold.

Ron, however, seemed very displeased.

“I owe the twins so much money.”

[mintaikk]

You Know What? Fuck It. Jealous & Clingy Vox Headcanons

"Angel quit?"

Come on. Yall saw how happy he was at the possibility that Angel quit. How can I not make my silly little- sometimes fucked up bcuz look at them- headcanons?!

-Vox and Val aren't dating, but Vox would very much like for them to be an item, but either doesn't know how to voice it or just thinks what they have right now is fine. That doesn't mean that he won't get a little (a lot)! jealous when Val flirts with other people. But since they're on the same power level, he can't really do anything about it, so he just becomes quiter and does other things. Check his phone, wait it out, be a petty little bitch in the corner, etc, etc

-When Val is done flirting with them and him and Vox are alone again, Vox has one of two reactions; be extra physical or affectionate or be a petty little bitch. It really depends on his mood. When he becomes extra affectionate, he'll cuddle up to Val or make out with him or they'll probably just fuck honestly. When he's being a petty little bitch, he'll sit there like a toddler and mope, sometimes ignoring Val. Val thinks both of this behavior is adorable either way, and sometimes flirts with people in front of Vox just to get a reaction out of him (read this person's comic to know what I mean, I love it sm)

-He's a needy, touch-starved bottom. Ya'll saw the way Vox pulled Val into a position where his arms would be wrapped around him at the beginning of their dance (and Vox arching his back-), right? Y'know how after Val kisses someone he leaves his weird red spit behind? That appeared on Vox's mouth when Vox started singing Stayed Gone. Like, "Hey babe, can you give me a good luck kiss before I sing a disstrack for my ex?". He wants/needs physical affection so much and so bad

-I now also headcanon that he's embarrassed to ask for it in a romantic way, so he only does it 'accidently' or to fit the situation (like how he pulled Val in that position in the dance)

-Valentino has merch of himself and Vox bought some of it

-Yes, he stalks Val. That's actually canon

- Vox has so many cameras pointed at Val. Val is aware of this and sometimes performs for the camera in various ways. He honestly doesn't care surprisingly, since Vox isn't really gonna do anything with the footage other than be a voyeuristic little freak

(Tysm @that-oneforkmod for pointing this out. Ik he's being creepy, but I laughed way too hard at where the cameras are pointing and how down bad my guy is)

- Despite Vox's clinginess, Val can also be incredibly clingy and it can get on Vox's nerves. He'll get pissy when Vox won't hold him or give him attention and Vox will be annoyed, but when Val stops being prissy, Vox will then give him affection. (Litterally just "not talk to me I angy" "Ok"*leaves* "wait no, come back")

[omghallucinations]

charts that made me go "oh boy": stray kids lee know

ok. well. i've been on a journey.

i was innocently inputting idols with known birth times into my astro software as i do and i put this guy in and said "oh... oh boy..." out loud so obviously i decided to do a write-up

i finished this write-up. realized i was bias wrecked all to hell. so. there u go. let this be a warning to you all. be careful whose chart you analyze because you could end up with a Problem!!

unrelated (related) i just love a sagittarius moon. my favorite moon there is. some people love a taurus moon, fair, valid (also lee know has his moon in the 2nd which is basically a layer of taurusy vibe) but i love a sagittarius moon most of all. those guys are crazy (affectionate). you cannot kill them in any way that matters. truly understand the inherent hilariousness of life... .. somehow can always see through the illusions of capitalism... i love them.

who is this anaretic degree ass

girl how many important degrees... do u need... ... i have two 29s and one 0 in my chart and i thought that was a lot...

lee know has both venus and neptune at 29 (and venus at 29.59 which is, wow old soul ready to get the hell off this lawn much?). the anaretic degree is the "fated degree"--it's like, your soul has just about mastered this energy and is about to take it somewhere else (bc the next degree is not 30, it's 0 of the next sign) so it's time for some TESTS. it's crises and gifts. often you're naturally good at this energy in whatever form that takes, but it's gonna fuck with you on and off throughout your life. more during the first half to be fair. especially with that 0 degree saturn, he'll probably be in way better shape after his saturn return.

venus at 29(.59?!?!) in libra -- ok i also have venus at 29 (.09!), so i can tell you that he never has to be single if he doesn't want to be, but it is not gonna go right for a long ass time and he's gonna be weird and intense about relationships and it will not feel good. he might think it is going right. he is wrong. get ready for some gifts but ALSO some crises with love and creativity and beauty and shit--especially with venus at home in libra and his scorpio rising. he's definitely captivating, and can probably bamboozle whoever he wants with his beauty and charm, but his crisis and urgency feeling in love is probably a Whole Lot both for him and for his partners. and it's in the 12th house like.. .. . oh boy honey. he's gonna hide his need for love and validation and his sensitivity so hard. also literally his relationships (and they'll probably be undefined for a long time) despite the fact that every one is gonna be so intense.

it's also opposite his 0 degree saturn????? girl!! and conjunct his sun also in the 12th... .. . . . well at least you are so beautiful and charming and generous, lee know, and everyone really likes you. i know u issues and tremendous sensitivity that you hide like crazy and probably a judgmental family member (who probably means well, unfortunately!) whose influence burdens u even now as u feel like there are somehow always Forces Working Against You for no reason! even tho u just gotta Believe In Yourself dot mp3.....

bright side! when he works through some of this stuff he's very likely gonna have a very solid and mature marriage and he already has sort of a maturity leg-up, thank u saturn in taurus and juno conjunct sun. eventually you will look back on the many unhinged texts you sent at 2am and laugh... . .. more than you already do, you sagittarius moon, you!!

neptune at 29 capricorn in the 3rd house -- hahahaha welcome to crises and gifts around dreams, illusions, secrets, delusions, etc. and make it capricorn: old soul vibes, anxiety, not gonna settle until later in life. in the 3rd house: dreams and illusions with gemini vibes, unending curiosity, brain running at 300 all day all night, so many Thoughts. hm. does he have adhd (inattentive subtype)???he's super creative and iconoclastic but he may be doing a lot of talking and not a lot of... doing. it's also a weird mood to have the fanciful dreams planet in the harsh reality sign, there's conflict inherent there. (oh lord, neptune is square venus and saturn with a 0 orb??? t-square??? bro??? lee know did ur parents or teachers or society crush ur dreams??? do you now crush your own dreams urself in advance to avoid disappointment??? do u think you can either have love or success and not both???)

(i can fix him!! wait.)

lunar nodes at 29 (NN in Leo in the 10th, SN in Aquarius in the 4th) -- lol this plus his 29.59 venus, his soul is Ready to Move On from these lessons hahaha, luckily his career really reflects his soul growth shit--moving away from his comfort zone of being a semi-reclusive iconoclastic weirdo with depressive tendencies who stays at home and moving towards self expression, celebration of himself and creativity in his career/a public space. he is gonna have a lot of crises about this though, since the south node is still really important and you shouldn't abandon it, it's ur foundation. he's gonna have questions like what does "be yourself" even mean??? how public is too public? how private is too private? what if i Fail, Publicly??? what if i don't put myself out there enough???

(he probably does not put himself out there enough, because of the relationship between his nodes, saturn, venus and his 12th house sun--but he should!! fight for your opportunities king!!)

(if u do not already have a therapist, lee know, please... get a therapist... it will help u.... i swear....)

we're still not done with degrees for some reason

saturn at 0 degrees taurus in the 6th house: another #same, my saturn is also at 0 degrees!! ateez jongho is another one with a 0 degree saturn, it's a very strong aura no matter what. any planet at 0 is fresh and new and EXCITED TO BE THERE and depending on aspects etc it will almost always express the energy of the planet in that sign real... loud... and real... vibrantly... ... .. without much nuance... for better or worse. this doesn't have to be a straightforward manifestation of the sign, sometimes it's wonky, but either way it's just a lot of Pure Sign and Planet Energy.

saturn is a more outer planet, so normally the sign its in is more of a light flavor and the much more important thing is the aspects and the house its in. if saturn is at 0, scratch that whole sentence

saturn in taurus is really. really clear in lee know's personality, tbh even to someone who only knows him from his professional activities. like. startlingly. i see her. saturn is a force for maturity, lessons, responsibility, discipline, structure, practicality, actual real physical life not the idea of life, and in taurus it's going. home. bye. the taurus jumps out. he's not too fussed about how much attention he's getting, or how much center time, he never jumps in ego-first. in the sixth house of work daily life and virgo vibes he's just gonna do what he's gotta do and get it done. solid, mature, grounded, no celebrity disease in sight, really a nice counterpoint to the kinda manic romance he's got going on in the 12th that would unhinge him from reality in many ways if it weren't for saturn

sixth house also gives some health stuff, some virgo vibes, can be critical. he might have or have had some health probs, or he may have them in future if he isn't super careful

taurus in the sixth to me gives apartment rooftop garden, beloved pets (6th house is the small animals house :)), dependable cornerstone at work but leaves at 5pm sharp because he wants to GO HOME. he's not gonna do more than he has to do because that's #stupid and he's not #stupid. he's not lazy at all he uses exactly the amount of energy he needs to and no more, again, because he's not dumb. vibes. icon. comfort. ease. chilling out.

he probably can really cut you deep if he wants to (especially with his chart ruler being his super specific and critical virgo mars in the 10th), luckily he doesn't care enough most of the time

(being mean in a funny way does not count, because of his aforementioned sagittarius moon and various gemini/virgo influences, it's the way he expresses affection!)

party (?) in his first house

idk i think a lot of idols have stuff in their first house, more proportionally than most people, which makes sense for their whole...situation. anyway. his first house has:

scorpio mercury: fun!! anything in your first house is gonna color the rest of your chart, almost like another layer to your rising. for example ateez hongjoong and (g)idle soyeon are both capricorn risings with uranus and neptune in the first house, so they're not regular capricorn risings, they're capricorn-aquarius-pisces risings. with mercury in there lee know gets a fun gemini/virgo flavor to his life path/vibe. he's gonna be chattier, funnier, externally wittier than most scorpio risings, more similar to a gemini or virgo rising in that way. it really is his cross of Sexy Intense Head Bitch You Shouldn't Cross but also Head Silly Yapper. his mercury is widely conjunct his ascendant, so the gemini/virgo/communication focus comes across strongly.

he's smart and curious and can talk anyone into anything at any time. it's another thing in his chart that chills out the sort of. self-serious Drama of scorpio placements (she said, scorpio moonly). mercury is zany!! and can really think itself into all sorts of interesting places (anxiety vortex? deluluville? why not both???)

scorpio chiron: well ya can't have it all. he has some pain and wounds around his own identity and place in the world as well as his soul-need for independence and self-assertion. it's complicated for him to Be Himself and with scorpio he probably has some past life shit here (in addition to his many heavily karmic 29 degree placements, let's all say thank you god for giving him a sagittarius moon and mercury in the 1st house)

sagittarius pluto: power. magnetism. take the usual power of a scorpio rising and crank it up to 20. also he has a temper under the calm, methodical taurus saturn and also thinks he's right 100% of the time. and he has some deep feelings and can empathize with the suffering of others! most importantly his past life stuff has been rooted in the search for identity and place in the world and he finds unconscious security in independence and his ability to assert himself, probably extra complicated for his 29 degree libra venus who craves union with another! lol!

this is honestly only just scratching the surface (just like any chart interpretation) but i gotta stop!! unfortunately i've been bias wrecked by an astrological chart. embarrassing as hell!!

[goosedoes-fics]

Madness Headcanons

Madcom x Reader

Content Warnings: I talk about tits a lot sorry. Also mentions of organ failure and transfem Tricky

Notes: Trying to get back into the writing groove. Sorry if this is shit

HANK J WIMBLETON

If you didn't know ASL before meeting them, they would communicate primarily with hand and head movements. He's too cool to use a notepad

Not a big fan of PDA, but in private he's quite affectionate and cuddly. theyre just a big ass guard dog cmon

Hank Motherfucker Wimbleton what are you doing here????? waiting for them to play gangnam styl.

DEIMOS

Transgenda

I like to imagine Dedmos's rock face works similarly to Hank's metal jaw. It's just a rock jaw. Rock lobster.

He is an ASSHOLE (affectionate)

The kind of person to like. Punch your shoulder when they laugh

Their ideal first date is stealing the declaration of independence

If you don't make him, he will go days without showering he is SO smelly anfd SO stinky. He has GREASY ASS HAIR i just know it

SANFORD

If Hank is a guard dog he's one of those goofy dogs that look like bear cubs

VERY big fan of PDA he will smooch you anywhere. everywhere. any time any place any day

He takes missions more seriously than Deimos but outside of missions he is just a big fat goofball

I'm going to place my hands directly on his man tits. anyways where was I

He lost his nipples in The War

I'm kidding. He lost them during top surgery.

At this point i'm aiming the transgenderification beam at all of them. nobody is safe. BE TRANSGENDER

DOC

Sometimes he wears his hair down and it's like a mullet w/ shaved sides

Out of all of them he's the most adverse to PDA but! In private he is very sweet. very silly

Hey are you okay with being tested on? Yeah? Cool will you drink this organ failure potion I brewed

Plays the piano sometimes! He might serenade you if you ask nicely

TRICKY

BE TRANSGENDER. (shoots her with my transfem beam)

Yeah so he/she bigender Tricky is real. Krinkels told me himself

He is like a big weird dog as well. He might lick your face (don't let him zed spit is slightly acidic)

Probably likes PDA the most. She will make out with you very grossly and sloppily in the middle of McDonalds

Very soft very fluffy. Which is surprising considering how many times he's died

His tail is somewhat prehensile, he could dangle from a tree branch if he tried hard enough

CHURCH AND JORGE

They are very good at sharing!

Sorry not sorry yandere enjoyers but they would NOT kill someone for looking at you they would be like haha yeah everyone should look at our awesome fucking partner theyre so cool and hot

Sometimes they forget how big they are compared to you so they might try to like flop over on you. Pigpile on the small one

Very prone to roughhousing and play fighting but they'll be gentle if you ask

BEEFY BOYS 😍

[rottenstrawberrymilk]

us

jigen daisuke x reader

1.9k words

      "Move over." 

        His voice is gruff but you know that he just sounds like that. He's not angry at you. Actually, you're not sure if Jigen is even capable of being angry with you. All you know is that he's back and you're nothing but happy to see him. Just like every time. You obey, scooting over to the side of the couch as he throws his jacket off onto the cushions. 

        "Jigen!" You smile as he sits down and you throw your arms around him, practically colliding against his body hard enough to elicit a soft grunt on his end. Your cheek presses to his affectionately and sinks to rest in the crook of his neck as one of his hands goes to steady his hat on his head and the other wraps over your shoulders. 

        "What, you missed me?" he asks, head against the back of the couch. You can see the slight smile on his face. That makes you feel aglow. 

        "'Course I did! I miss you every time. It's boring here without you..." 

        "Don't lie, (Y/N)--I know you just nap around all day when I'm not here." 

        You fake an outraged gasp. "Only because you're not here! I can't think about how you're not around if I'm sleeping, right?" 

        You feel Jigen's shoulder shrug against you. "You're gonna fuck with your sleep pattern if you keep it up. Pick up a hobby or somethin'." 

        "I'm trying! Sometimes I practice darts. I'm gonna beat you one day, just watch me." 

        Jigen snorts. "Keep dreaming." 

        You fall a bit quiet, feeling as though something was off about him. Still, you don't move off of him, if anything holding him closer. "You alright?" You ask, a bit quietly. 

        Jigen simply sighs, readjusting his position on the couch so his head is at the end of it and his legs are stretched towards the opposite side. You move so you're on top of him, head on his chest, breathing in his cologne as you get comfortable. His hand goes to your hair and your eyelashes flutter slightly. The same usual exhaustion that his arrival had banished before was quickly returning to you. Stubbornly, you tried to stay awake for his answer. 

        "Long day. That's all." 

        "Where's the others?"

        "Lupin and Fujiko are off doing whatever the fuck. Dunno where Goemon went off to. They'll probably be back soon, don't worry." 

        You giggle. "Trust me, I'm not. I just wanna know how much time I have before you get all mean."

        "Whadya mean?" You can feel his fingers tighten a little bit in your hair and still. You swallow a bit nervously. For a moment, you're silent, before you decide to come clean with your concerns. Good relationships have good communication right? If there's a problem you should tell him...

        A soft sigh leaves you. "I don't know...you just get kinda...cold, I guess. Like whenever Lupin or Goemon or Fujiko or just anyone are around it's like you don't wanna be near me. And...I guess it stops when we're alone together but that doesn't happen a lot, so..." You trail off, not sure what else to say. Jigen can feel you tense in his arms.  

        Jigen is quiet for a second or two. You figured he was trying to find the best way to answer without hurting your feelings. "I don't mean to make you feel like that," he eventually tells you. His fingers go back to absentmindedly tangling through your hair and you can't help but stifle a sigh of relief. "I just...don't really like putting on a show, y'know? I like us having privacy. It's nice. If you want someone to stick their hand up your skirt or something in front of everyone, Lupin's gonna be more your guy-" 

        Your head lifts suddenly with shock, eyes wide. "Jigen!" 

        He laughs. "Sorry. I like seeing you get all huffy, it's cute." His hand becomes snug against the small of your back, bringing you closer to him. His thumb rubs slow patterns into your skin and your head drops back down again, cheek pressing into his shirt. 

        One of your hands goes to fidget with his tie as you ignore the heat flooding your face. 

        "You mind if I nap a little?" he asks, reaching his arms up behind his head in a slow, tired stretch. Guess he wasn't lying about it being a long day for him. 

        "Not at all. Want me to move?" 

        He quickly shook his head. "No. Stay here with me." He doesn't say it directly to you much, but you know he misses you just as much as you miss him. He doesn't need to explain that to you. 

        Jigen stretches out once more and you adjust your own position as well until you're comfortable, higher up on him. Your head nestles under his head, in between his neck and jaw. Either of your hands clasp faintly at the collar of his dress shirt. One of his hands briefly closes around your balled up ones, giving them a slightly squeeze. He pulls them up slightly, dipping his head so he can softly press his lips to the back of your hand. His beard scratches over your wrists as he lets your hands drop again back to his chest. 

        The gunman reached up, taking his hat from his head. Gently, he brings it to rest over his face and the brim in turns covers your face as well. The darkness it provides is actually surprisingly welcome and you already begin to close your eyes again. That, and the overwhelming scent of the product he used in his hair was extremely soothing and had you falling asleep within minutes. 

        You didn't know how long you'd been out for this time, but you figured it'd only been a short period. Jigen's hand was gently jostling your shoulder in an attempt to wake you up further. Tiredly, you stretch out over top of him, face rubbing into his neck as you yawned. He takes his hat from your face, fixing it back on his head. 

        "Wanna move?" He asks, voice rough from waking up. "My neck's getting sore." 

        Sleepily, you nod. He sits up, pulling you up with him. You shift so you slide off of his lap and stand up. He's at your side, hand reaching for the small of your back. With ease, he guides you down the hall, ignoring your bleary stumbling. You only look up once when approaching his room's door. Your eyes become less foggy as you lean forwards to focus--trying to make out exactly what's been newly taped to the door. Eventually, it becomes clear and you smile.

        A picture of you and Jigen cuddling on the couch, your arms wrapped around him, his hand looped over the small of your back while the other hung off the side of the couch--of course with his hat over both of your faces. 

        Jigen shoulders you gently to the side to get a better look himself. Bent over slightly, he tilted his hat up with the bend of his finger. 

        He didn't say anything in that exact moment. Instead, his hand went to his gun. With easy familiarity, he switched off the safety. You watched him turn and storm off, in the direction of Lupin's room, muttering something about "putting a bullet in that damn camera". You knew he'd be back soon enough.

        Yikes. All right after his little "valuing privacy" speech too. 

        Still, you turned back to the door. Gently, so you wouldn't tear the polaroid too roughly from the adhesive on the door, you pulled the photo off. You held it in both of your hands, almost a bit too fondly now that Jigen is far out of sight and you don't have to pretend to be angry about the photograph too. Under any other circumstance, you're sure this would have all been super creepy. But knowing it was probably just Lupin who took it, you felt a lot more at ease. No doubt he genuinely thought it was cute and wanted to tease Jigen a little bit. 

        I hope he doesn't think it's embarrassing, being seen with me by them. That'd be kinda fucked up..." 

        It's hard to question the state of your relationship with the gunman when you're fawning over the way his arm was wrapped around you in the picture and how closely you held him in return. You bring the picture up at your fingertips, briefly pressing it to your lips before folding it in half and tucking it in your back pocket. You'd think of a place to hide it later. For now, you just wanted to finally get some good quality sleep, instead of another mini nap.

        You opened his bedroom door, leaving it open behind you as you entered. You knew he'd be coming back soon.

        With a heavy sigh, you collapsed onto his mattress a bit dramatically. You bury your face in the nearest pillow, inhaling his scent once more. God you didn't think there'd ever be a more perfect combination than cologne, cigarette smoke, whiskey, and whatever that certain thing was that made Jigen...well...Jigen. Your fingers curl almost longingly into the pillowcase as your expression softens with oncoming drowsiness. 

        About five minutes later, Jigen crept in, shutting the door with his heel. His bunched up suit jacket hung from one of his arms as he undid his tie with his free one. Quietly, he tossed both of them off to the side of the mattress, kicking off his shoes as he approached his side of the bed. Slowly, he settles down onto the sheets of his bed, setting his hat onto the top of the lamp on his nightstand.

        You seem to sleep easier when his arms wrap around you once more. One of his hands drifted up the backside of your upper thigh, slow over the curve of your ass. As his palm brushed over your back pocket, it suddenly stopped. Jigen put his thumb in your pocket, letting the rest of his fingers rest on you. Upon feeling a papery corner brush over the pad of thumb, Jigen's head lifted a little bit. 

        Easily, he pulled the paper from your back pocket without waking you. He unfolded it.

        The photo.       

        You'd kept it. He flipped it over between two fingers. Jigen stifled a chuckle. He could see the tint of your chapstick against the picture. After he glanced over the picture once more, he carefully folded it back in half. His hand reached back over your hip, to your back pocket, slipping it back in. 

        Jigen smiled as you shifted closer, unconsciously, into his chest.

[crescencestudio]

Hello! Thank you for your hard work and for taking the time to answer our questions! I saw you were planning touch averse options in Alaris, which made me wonder how LIs handle the exact opposite? Like a very tactile MC, who would constantly need physical contact either before or during a relationship?

hi! thank you so much 💖 it's been nice answering questions about the cast! it's always fun to imagine them in different situations esp outside of the context of the plot ^^

✨ LIs and a Physically Affectionate MC

Kayn: at first if ur SUPER tactile, they might be the slightest bit cautious. it's nothing against u personally, they're just a bit wary of ppl who r super touchy with them. after a while, when theyre used to you, they'll just see it as another part of who you are and happily accept it

Druk: this guy is pretty tactile too so you'd probably be pretty compatible with him. lots of casual physical affection--putting his arm around your shoulder, playing with ur hair, holding onto u when he laughs. etc.

Fenir: it's gonna take a while for him to get used to it LOL. he'll probably flinch away a lot in the beginning just bc it's kinda overwhelming for him. as he gets used to it tho, he'll stop flinching as much. will prob have a little difficulty reciprocating but will def try his best anyways so that you feel loved

Etza: honestly seeks out physical touch a lot themself so it would work out! i imagine a lot of hand holding, a lot of rubbing your back when you're sad or any other comforting form of physical touch, likes kissing the back of your hand absentmindedly

Kuna'a: ur gonna get him excited LLDOAKS. big fan of physical touch. at first they honestly might be surprised bc they're used to being the more physically affectionate one in a relationship. but eventually it'll turn into a lot of casual physical touch like putting their hand on your waist or your lower back

Aisa: kinda just stares at you when you touch them LSOOALA not much of a reaction going on there laslodlaldls. BUT as the two of you get closer, youll notice them start reciprocating more like seeking out your hand to hold when ur together. ppl will def make remarks about how aisa doesn't typically crave physical touch like that

[rockitmans]

Hello, I really enjoy your writing and you seem confident in writing smut. Do you have any tips on how to go about it? I find is so awkward!

Hey thank you 😊 I am just a guy with a laptop but I can try my best to tell you some stuff that helps me.

First of all! My number one tip that everyone should follow IS that you really don't have to write smut if you don't want to. Probably obvious, but there's very few fics that actually require detailed smut and if it makes you uncomfy it may not be worth it. BUT I'm sure you know that already and are here for some actual advice so here we go.

Gonna get a tiny bit nsfw but not graphically. All this is advice only, nothing is ever a hard and fast rule, especially in writing. Take what you like and chuck out the rest. Other writers feel free to add on 💖

What's the point of the smut?

Personally I think smut is always better if it is conveying something about the characters or the story. If the point of it is just to be pwp that is absolutely fine ofc but if it's within a larger story what are you trying to convey? Desire for each other that's finally bubbled over? Connection and trust? Playfulness and fun?

Whatever the angle, try and keep that motivation in your mind. If the sex is about connection, focus on the internal feelings, lots of affectionate words between them, a lot of eye contact etc. If it's about that "I must have you now" passion, maybe it's quicker, choppier, more desperate and less talking.

Smut doesn't have to be hot to be good and valid in the story. Maybe it's sometimes deliberately bad sex. Maybe sometimes it's soft and sweet rather than steamy. Don't get too stressed trying to make it titillating (if I may use that word).

Character first

Following on from that. Think about your characters, especially in the context of the AU you've put them in if that's the case. Who would instigate? Who would take charge? If someone is very playful and jokey out of the bedroom, they'll probably take that energy into it. If they're serious and passionate, likewise.

I'm sure as a writer you've often thought that the characters sometimes just do their own thing without your input because you're in their head so much. Let that energy guide you through sex scenes as well. (I very accidentally set myself up for wall sex in one of my fics once because the characters would not shut up about it.)

Write about what you like

Especially for your first few attempts, write about stuff you enjoy. Whether that be in real life, fantasy or you just have an academic interest in. I've been called out multiple times for liking subby Blaine 😂 And yes! I do! I find it fun to write so that's why I write it.

Think about what specifically you enjoy about your scenario and express that on page. This should in turn lead to an enjoyable reading experience! If you're not sure what you like, read some smut and think about what parts of it appeal to you. Avoid writing kinks that squick you out.

It's about the fantasy

I wouldn't get too bogged down in mechanics. Especially of anal sex. Fanfiction is sort of fantasy and doesn't need to be incredibly realistic to be fun. By all means make sure you're conveying a sense of how your characters are positioned and how they are interacting but don't get into the weeds of minutiae if you don't need to. It's not a how-to guide and being too mechanical can remove the spice.

Invoke the five senses

General writing advice is to get all senses involved but it's just as important for smut. A few examples.

Sight: how their partner looks, their body, especially if it's your POV character's first time seeing them naked AND how that makes them feel. Lighting is a good visual way of setting the mood. Soft, romantic lighting for their first time? Candles for romance. Just in broad daylight in the middle of the kitchen for spontaneity.

Sound: Gasping, sighing, moaning, their partners voice. Are they talking? Laughing? Why? Are things going wrong or are they just giddy and excited? Is there people nearby that they can hear that adds to the thrill? Do they play music?

Smell: smells on the other person they've never noticed because they've never been that close before. I tend to avoid talking about unpleasant smells because it kind of takes you out of the moment. But washing powder, cologne, shampoo, all that stuff is golden.

Taste: I'm sure you can use your imagination on this one! The taste of their partners mouths when kissing, the taste of salt on their skin, the taste of them intimately

Touch: This one is so key! Are touches deliberate or incidental? Gentle or rough? What emotion does a certain touch invoke? Capturing sensation and mood can be more effective than pure description sometimes. And the touch doesn't just have to come from each other. What about the feel of the sheets? Toys? Are they having sex on a surface that is hard or rough?

Write scared

Posting smut is intimidating and a lil scary, especially the first time but probably several times after that as well. As the well known saying goes: Feel the fear and do it anyway. We all start somewhere and we are all constantly improving. If you are very brave you can ask for con crit but otherwise it's just a skill to hone like any other. I believe in you!

[indecisive-dizzy]

Hiiiiiiiiii pookiiweeeee :)

I’m thinking more about my whole high school DearDollops angst au, I have so many ideas for them ;v;

I’m thinking a lot about their friendship after the entire situation. It’s awkward and complicated but they’re trying their best

Eddie lets his hair grow out a bit, and Daisey pulls it back into a little high ponytail. It’s cute and Eddie appreciates it

They’re just a lot more affectionate now, mostly on Eddie’s side cause he’s nervous. Daisey tries to reassure him but they’re also nervous

They hang out a lot more, but conversations are not super easy to hold up anymore

It’s just Eddie yapping and Daisey listening, but it helps them get comfortable again

Eddie invited Daisey to hang out with him and the rest of the neighbors/his friends and they immediately called for a group huddle to talk about it

Daisey could hear everything they said but ignored it

Daisey calls him Edd. It flip flops between that and Eddie, but they mostly use Edd

I’m thinking after some really stressful and tiring after school sports practice (I still don’t know what sport I want Eddie to do), Daisey just walks to the field to wait for him and he immediately runs and tackle-hugs them

Daisey’s just walking over to the field and saying hi, and Eddie just goes “Daaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiseeeeeeyyyyyyyyy :(“ and tackles them into a hug

They probably eat Smile-Dip behind the school and look at clouds

They’re the kind of duo to spray people with silly spray during parties together

The teasing from both their friend groups are non stop. They mention hanging out once and immediately someone starts making kissy noises

Is that the queue that I’m making them romantic? Possibly-

I need to make incorrect quotes for them they’re too precious to me once they’re at this stage :,3

Hiiii Bestieee :]

Oh yay Aftermath Friendship! let the awkward begin lol (post typing me is adding a cut bc I think this is a tad long lol 😅)

ponytail Eddie my beloved that sounds so cute

Sorry did you mean Touch Starved Best Friends Have Recently Made Up And It's Awkward But They Really Want To Cuddle?

Eddie's yapping is fun to listen to at least, bc of the topic, his accent, or his enthusiasm. Plus I think sometimes he'll mention something and Dasiey manages to respond to it before he moves on, thus triggering a more back n forth convo. still def takes a while for it feel as natural as it did before

Daisey standing next to the group huddle looking into the camera (the wall) like they're in the office lol

He may be sore as heck but that will not stop Eddie from tackling Daisey. Pain be damned it's Hug Time.

Also. Mind if I share some sport ideas for Eddie? Ahem! Weightlifting, Volleyball, Cross Country, or Soccer! Cross country and soccer are kinda funny w/ his clumsiness but I like the idea of Eddie in running type sports. Tho he could be a soccer goalie! Weightlifting needs little explanation lol he a strong boy. and volleyball is fun w/ more clumsy potential but less running lol

Points at you! That's sounds adorable but now I wanna know what they'd both be like on smile dip high or whatever it is that happens lmao

They're both hiding behind the same wall thinking they'll jump spray some rando only to spray each other in the face with silly string XD

NO DANGIT You just gave me the mental image of Howdy turning around to do the fake making out motions Thing! you know what I mean Idk what it's called! Barnaby Loses his mind and needs to lay down he's laughing too hard. Eddie's face is redder than his hair and he's yelling ajdhajdjah gah these idiots I love them sm

[three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat]

GHIRAHIM

PHASE TWO

OBSERVATIONS

Why's he laughing

At least he said hi this time?

Thread of fate. I just can't.

Ghirahim really just said "we're soulmates" huh

Hair flip

The way he presents the drawings is hilarious actually

These drawings are actually very strange- presumably, back when the gates were built, Lanayru wasn't all sandy, yet the depiction of it clearly shows a desert

Goddess's guard dog = twig = Impa?

Rainbows? It's filled your heart with rainbows?

(I know what you are)

WHY IS HE KNEELING LIKE THAT

"I know I can be honest with you" 🤨

Dramatic bastard (affectionate)

JUMP

Giggly

This is probably the best side by side comparison and IN CONCLUSION: Ghirahim is like. His chin touches the top of Link's head. Idk.

Ok they're a bit far away now but yeah. I stand by that.

I'm honestly curious where he learned Link's name. Did Link introduce himself at Skyview? Was it when he heard it from Zelda???

This is a surprisingly nice offer (by which I mean said nice)

...Where did the wind come from? Is one of Ghirahim's abilities the power to summon a breeze to dramatically blow back his hair and cape?

(Once more: I like his cape)

Literally no straight explanation for the way he shows off

Also the way it looks like corruption, sort of, is very interesting. Looks cool. Can't imagine it's not painful.

WAIT does he only have one ear???

Again with the thread of fate. You have something you want to say?

Ohhh cool the background sound is intensifying

Still does the hair flip if you stand still long enough

Anyway if I don't have my shield out he slaps me so I can't get a good height comparison that way BUT. Perhaps a bit taller than what I said before. Hard to tell.

You can make his daggers land in the ground (they'll disappear after a second but they're very clearly stuck there)

MMMM DUEL WIELDING

Ohhhh now he licks the blade. Kinda unsanitary if you ask me

Ooh the corruption is on his back too

Skyward Strikes are still blocked by... something. Kinda weird how it looks

Never noticed before but he blocks the daggers you direct back at him with his sword

There ARE diamond slits on the back his pants, as well as his left leg being dark like the front

The daggers track you! Never noticed that before!

If you parry his hit he'll respond with an identical slash

His swords are crossed when he buries them in the ground

He has an overhead slash, a sideways slash that's a bit twirly (can lead with either hand), a one sword at a time slash (starting with his right), and one where he spreads his arms out and brings his swords in to hit you (like scissors)

Trying to hit him with the bow results in the same thing as the Skyward Strike, but its almost like he... moves really fast to the side to dodge it

YEAH you can see it with the clawshot he's somehow able to move really fast to dodge it

Ok there was more stuff I wanted to test but apparently knocking the daggers back actually DOES hurt him

Anyway. In conclusion.

WHY CAN HE SPEED TO THE SIDE LIKE THAT? WHY?

Also: dramatic bastard (affectionate)

[shytastemakerthing]

I do like Twisted Wonderland Romantic Matchups please!

I'm a ISFP-T My height is 163! I don't like to go out if I'm alone but if I with my parent,friends even if there is only one friend I'm good to go. When I with my friends or person I trust I'll be very lively and joyful. Hang out with my friends is very fun and I enjoy those time so much but when I have to go with other people I kinda not enjoy it and it make me feel tired but I can't say no to them.

I like Jazz,Electro swing music and playing games like single game of JRPG,Rhythm,Otome I don't like to play MMORPG when I have to play alone so I'll only play MMORPG when my friends want to play. I also like the sound of piano! I can play a little bit!

I like sweet a LOT! anything that's sweet is very welcome for me!(not you dentist-) I don't like vagetables,sour and bitter tastes. It's kind of surprising because my least favorite food is raw oyster like you know who-

I'm not good at sports but I like to cheer on my friends. like told them to do their best or prepare a cold water for them. I got a very bad score at math- but I'm very good with languages lessons!

I have a very polite manners when it come to other people I don't know or don't feel safe with. I mean I can't just trust them so easily but I get tricked so easily- I'm not good with teasing or flirting(but I didn't say I don't like it-) If they do that to me my face would go hot, I'll keep avoid face face with them until I cool down but if they know I'm embarassed and keep teasing me- I would stare at those people saying ‘Nooo I hate youuu go awayyyy(?)’ but I not really mean I hate you! and I'm sure almost people would know because they'll laugh out loud at that time... What so fun please!

I'm a very caring at other too. I like to observe person I have to be with or be friend with so we can understand each other and get along. I like to cheer for my friends. I mean every single words I say I'm sure it's probably help someone who hearing this. I never know what they might hear or face with terrible things but I can help them have faith and be kind with themself even if it's a little I want to say kind things to them.

Anddd this is all of me! I guess? was it too long? I hope you will not get tired from reading this. I'm very excite for the result. Whoever this may come I hope we'll get along! Thank you very much!

A/N: Thank you so much for your request! Honestly, as soon as I started reading this, i very quickly found out who would be absolutely perfect for you! I may or may not be showing favoritism because he is also one of my favorite characters 😂😂

I match you with.....

Idia Shroud

• For freaking starters, look at this man's hair! It's PINK because of the slew of compliments that he is wearing because of that drop dead amazing suit! I see you as someone like that when someone flirts with you or teases you in an affectionate manner! I swear, if you both do this at each other, there will be fumbling words, pink cheeks, AND pink hair. Honestly, you're both just too freaking cute!

• Now, Idia is the resident shut in of Ignihyde and the entirety of NRC. The man never leaves if he can help it! It doesn't change a whole lot when you're in the picture as his anxiety and fear of people is extremely strong. But if you're lucky, you can talk him into going to a certain shop with you either early in the morning or late at night to avoid a whole lot of people. Just please, stay close to him and don't leave him behind, he'll cry.

• Ortho is now your little brother as well! Words can not express just how happy the little robot boy is as soon as you even start becoming friends with his brother. But now you're dating him? You've been upgraded to sibling status and you now have another person who will go with you anywhere you want to go. As well as a personal body guard if anyone is giving you a hard time. Idia gave him a self defense and protective mode for a reason! And it's being used to protect you!

• You love sweets and so does Idia. He has a whole flipping stash that the both of you can snack on within the safety and confines of his room. You put everything in a big ol' bowl and turn on the mayest anime series, or you watch him play his online matches, or even he watches you play your rhythm games! If you're stuck on a level, he will fully help you out!

• Idia is also someone who is not good at sports. Honestly, he isn't even really that active and will avoid the exercise any way that he can. But, we have a compromise! If he were to ever go out, and it's the both of you, you both walk to Sam's shop from Ignihyde or your dorm, stock up on sweets, and walk back. It's not full exercise but it's at least something.

• Okay, we all know that Idia is basically one of the smartest people in NRC and is a complete genius. With everything he has built and created, he certainly knows his way around Math and is willing to help you with it. He may not be the best when or comes to tutoring, but he is trying his best. Besides, he gets to spend as much time as possible sith you to help teach you this, he can't complain about that.

• He honestly loves that you're so polite! He has seen plenty of cruel people in this world but the fact thay you face it all with a smile, all polite, and doing your absolute best to be a good person? Yeah, his hair is pink once again. And if you show that same kindness to him? The man has bluescreened.

• Okay, at first, physical affection is something he's not at all used too and he was extremely jumpy for a very long time. He still is a little bit but not as bad. Now that we've progressed, you would never expect him to be as clingy as he is. The poor boy is touch starved. You'll be laying in his bed and playing thr latest otome game and he'd be curled up around you, watching you play while also adding in some nice commentary that never fails to make you laugh.

• There was one time you managed to talk him into going to a dorm leader meeting IN PERSON! When he walked in, everyone literally had to do a double take because they LITERALLY couldn't believe it! How you managed to get him to go? You got your hands on a limiter edition figurine that he been trying to get for ages and it was the last one! All he had to do was go to one dorm meeting in person, stay the time, and as soon as he returned, the figurine was his. A bit cruel, but it worked. Honestly, be loves you so much and js such a massive simp that he would do whatever it takes to make you happy.

• Overall, the relationship certainly had a LOT of bumps in the road to get to where the both of you are at. But your kindness has prevailed and honestly, Ortho js completely ecstatic about it! He is your Player 1 and he does what he needs in order to keep seeing that smile on your face!

[sunmoonjune]

Hiya Moonie! So I was wondering, do you have any advice for someone trying to start writing a Poly!OT8!Stray Kids x Reader? I had an idea for a Supernatural!AU where the boys are all different types of magical creatures (and the MC is also a magical creature) and I have the bare bones of the story planned, but since I'm kinda a baby Stay (my first official comeback with them was Case 143) I'm afraid that I won't portray the boys accurately or they'll be too OOC for anyone to enjoy my fic. I'll take any advice you've got, because I could probably use it lol. Thanks in advance!

-Magic Anon (can I be Magic Anon? Is that cool?)

hmmmm honestly I can never tell if my depictions of skz or other characters are accurate?? but I can tell you how I write them?

chan to me is a good mix of giggly/silly and serious,, he's very protective of the people he loves and pays very close attention to them -- he feels like the kind of person who can tell when the boys are upset before they are in a way you know? like he just cares SO much about them and he's always watching to make sure they're safe and cared for :'))) he also is protective too,, like he's always prepared to fight for the people he cares for <3 but he's also very silly and young too! like he still messes around with the boys and plays pranks and such xD

minho is very much a tsundere to me sometimes! like he acts a little colder at face value and his expressions can be a little more stoic but he also pays very close attention to skz and the people he loves <33 he likes to do little things for the boys and he's always prepared to do things for/with them to make sure they're happy and safe :')) he's a bit of a brat tamer to me and he seems to like it when people try to tease him cause he likes to punish them for it xD like the rest of skz he's super playful and likes to play the occasional prank to get a chuckle out of everyone

changbin is the problem child of skz even if he's the third oldest XD he's extremely silly and laughs easily! he's very proud of his muscles and likes to show them off and acts really young :}} he's very giggly and is very hard working! I think I write him a little bit more of a brat in a way?? like he likes to tease and be teased and he gets huffy and loud when he's the subject of the teasing xD he feels like the kind of guy who would be protective but in the kind of way where he trusts you to the ends of the earth he just worries about everyone else if that makes sense?

hyunjin is the world's biggest brat and he's VERY dramatic so I always write him as kind of a little shit sometimes xD he likes to tease and he likes to be put in his place it seems ;) he's very silly and I'll say it again -- VERY dramatic HAHA,, he's also very artistic and likes his alone time,, he talks about doing things alone a lot and enjoying that time by myself :}} I think one of his love languages is touch cause he adores loving up on jeongin especially xD

hannie is also kind of a brat too xD he's loud and playful and he can have a tendency to poke fun at some of the members in playful fights sometimes xD he also seems introverted to me and can prefer his alone time in private sometimes he can be brash and silly so he's kind of like an extroverted introvert if that makes sense? like extroverted with his friends but introverted when he's with others (same Han xD )

lixie!!! our sweet lix <333 so when you write Felix just think sunshine and then write exactly how that feels hehe :')) Felix is fr like the embodiment of sunshine <33 he's soft and mushy and caring and sweet like :"DD he adores his members and his family and his very physically affectionate (he LOVES to snuggle) he's very personable and ppl cannot resist him cause he's just so kind and gentle (tho those taekwondo medals mean something :O ) overall just an absolute sweetheart <33

seungmin is a little more quiet but he's also a brat xD he likes to poke fun and instigate playful arguments but he still loves his members :"D he's grown a little more extroverted over the years but I still see him as mostly an introvert! as skz says he's an awful lot like a puppy and I see him as kind of a golden retriever boy but just a little quieter sometimes maybe?? he's playful and sweet too <33

jeongin is the ultimate maknae and he knows he's the baby so he uses that to his advantage a LOT xD he's also kind of a brat but again, he uses those maknae privileges to get away with stuff a lot he's very playful and silly and can sometimes surprise you how quickly he changes from baby bread to daddy toast HAHA he's a little less physically affectionate I think than the others but thats not saying much because skz is constantly all over each other HAHA xD

I don't know if any of this will help but I guess this is part of how I imagine them?? not all of it may be accurate tbh but it's how I see them sometimes :"D

[birbfeeder2artisticboogaloo]

OOH U KNOW WHAT SORT OF STORY I WOULD LOVE TO SEE???

ok so hua cheng is feeling cheeky and naughty!! 'heehee hoohoo,' he thinks, 'i shall convince gege to let me send a lil butterfly to spy on his dumb friends!! their sexually charged antics will get us ~in the mood~ for fun!!! huehuehue >:D'

he goes to xie lian: 'gege!! let's look in on ur old pals, idiot 1 and idiot 2! it'll be fun :D'

xie lian: 'ohhhh idk san lang, that's violating their privacy, we probably shouldn't...... 👀👀👀' and 'it would be SO HARD to convince me to go along with it....... 👀👀👀' but actually he is. SUPER CURIOUS about how things are going for fengqing, ever since they got together. OFC HE WANTS TO SEE DAMMIT!!!!

so hua cheng sends the lil butterfly!! he and xie lian snuggle up to SPY on poor fengqing!!! (obvs they'll stop if it's VERY BAD and apologise later!! it's just!!! they're just CHECKING on them ok!!! IT'S NOT WEIRD!!! (it's very weird. they are very weird. (affectionate)))

LO AND BEHOLD. feng xin and mu qing are TOGETHER!!!! in a BEDROOM!!!!!!!! IN THEIR.........NIGHT CLOTHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

....................................................but they're just having a cuddle and being the sappiest, gentlest, most adorable couple of ALL TIME and it's AWFUL ;A; it's nothing spicy at all!! THEY'RE JUST MAKING SILLY FACES AND SMILING AND LAUGHING AND USING GROSS PET NAMES!!!!! EW!!!

CURSES!!! hua cheng's plans have been FOILED!!! lol the end 🤣

[hjellacott]

I love how, across so many hundreds of species (though perhaps not all) mothers have somehow agreed that fine, they will allow their babies to put their hands in their mouths, grab their faces, wake them up whenever the fuck they want, put their faces against theirs, bite them, climb on them, and all else.

It reminds me (very lovingly) of my mum. She always struggled to show and stand physical affection, because her parents weren't like that and she'd grown-up in an immediately post-war country in very rough and sad times, but when she had me, I was/am Miss Affection. Like, I still hold her hand when we walk around the street together and I'm in my late 20s. From the day I was born I was on top of her, kissing her, hugging her, always ON her, not understanding the meaning of boundaries at ALL and probably making her very nervous. But she changed for me. She allows me to be like that. Only me. Her "cub". And now she's getting some help for her mental health, she now lives alone, but last Christmas while I was visiting she surprised me by coming to tuck me in bed and kiss me and she told me "I love you" which isn't a normal thing from her, and it caught me so off guard I laughed and asked her what that was about (because it's the kind of situation where if she's telling me such things, my immediate thought is she's dying). And she smiled and said "I know I don't say it enough, but I'm trying". And dude, I nearly broke down in tears.

That's mothers for you. Even when you're a grown-up and moved out, they'll still be thinking about you and trying to climb whatever mountains to meet you halfway. It's only her and me now, and my mum seriously tries so hard to be both mum and dad, ever since Dad died when I was young-er. She's been reading the things I like, watching the films I like, learning about everything I enjoy -like, one time she put the BAFTAs on the telly, of which she knows nothing, and she doesn't even understand that much English, just because I'd said I'd go snooping around the BAFTAs and she thought if she watched them we could talk about them later-, and now, she's trying to meet me halfway when it comes to being ridiculously affectionate.

I just can't put into words how deeply I love that woman. No one's ever going to do half as much for me as she has, as she continues to, and the thought of ever not having her absolutely wrecks me. Man, if I ever am a Mum... I just wanna be like mine every step of the way.

You go, polar bear mama (cold outside, and warm as hell inside)

Mother and her cub

[teddybeartoji]

☆. contains: best friend!satoru gojo x fem!reader; fluff, reader is wearing glasses, i can't imagine playing video games with him he'd be so annoying lmao, valorant mention but i haven't actually played the game... wc: 0.9k

just a couple minutes ago you were on a game of valorant with bff!gojo, trying to win while he just joked around. like always. but after he baited the opposing team AND you, he got the final kill and all of the praise.

right now, you're jumping off the game and dialing him. it doesn't even ring twice before he picks up.

"i hate you."

and you swear you can hear him smiling.

"you love me."

"you got me killed!"

"well, i had to get their attention somehow, didn't i? you were a distraction, okay? all part of the plan, baby."

baby.

"yeah, i just wish i had known about the stupid fucking plan, satoru." he loves you like this, telling him off. he's knows you're joking, well, half-joking at least. he loves your tone, all demanding and bossy, like he's about to get punished. it gets him real excited.

"no need to mad at the guy who literally got us the win."

"you did no such thing, stop lying to yourself. you just got lucky." you snap back at him with a scoff. "you're so full of yourself."

"i have no idea what you're talking about, you're just upset because your most talented friend got the praise."

"NO SHIT! I WAS CARRYING AND THEN YOU JUST FUCKING-- UGH! OH, HERE COMES THE GREAT SAVIOUR, I DON'T KNOW HOW WE COULD'VE DONE IT WITH OUT YOU. I- i hate you." the words fall from your mouth with an annoyed tone.

satoru's laughter booms over the speaker of your phone and you feel the corners of your own mouth twitching upwards, turning your faux frown into a smile. he seems to always have that effect on you.

"aw, my poor little baby... worked so hard and yet nobody is there you to tell you that you did good. what ever will you do, hm?" he coos teasingly. he can just imagine you sitting on your chair, probably in some fucked up cris-cross position with arms folded over your chest, huffing and puffing. you're probably lazing around in a random big t-shirt and some sweats, glasses sliding down your nose. they keep falling from their spot and you just keep pushing them up every two seconds but you refuse to fix them, even worse, let him to fix them, afraid that they'll break for good. silly girl.

oh, how he wishes he could be there with you, he wants to see you. wants to see your eyes crinkle as you laugh at his stupidity and wants to see the anger in your eyes grow when he keeps insisting that he is better than you. although he has to admit to himself that he did indeed just 100% get lucky this time but that doesn't stop him from rubbing it in your face.

"i really do hate you. ugh, i wanna see you and your stupid face. you're so fucking annoying sometimes, it really blows my mind, satoru." you breathe out.

...

satoru pushes himself up from his comfortable position on the bed and stands there in the middle of the room with a pounding heart.

"what was that?"

"what was what?"

"what did you say?"

"when?"

"just a second a go, dummy."

"that i hate you?"

"no, after that."

"that you're so incredibly annoying?"

"actually you said 'fucking annoying' but no, before that."

"well i don't know, satoru... it seems like you heard me loud and clear, considering you're literally quoting me right now." you snicker.

"you wanna see me?" his voice is unusually quiet and it lacks the teasing tone you were expecting.

...

you shift in your seat. suddenly a surge of nervousness enters your body. was that too much? he's always so affectionate, always making jokes. and you didn't even mean to say that... it just slipped out! but you do wanna see him, even though it's in the middle of the night. you wanna see him, you wanna hear his voice here, in your home. you wanna let it warm you, make you laugh and lull you to sleep. everything, you just want everything. you want to be greedy. want him to come over and never leave. want him to hold you, want him to caress yo—

"do you mean it?" for once in his life, he doesn't sound overly cocky. his voice comes out barely above a whisper as if a bit scared of your answer. will you laugh it off? are you just kidding?

you swallow the lump in your throat.

"i... yeah, i do." you release the breath you didn't realize you were holding. he makes you nervous like nothing else has ever before. not a single exam or a test has made you feel like this. every time his crystalline eyes find yours, butterflies erupt in your stomach. your insides fill with them and you feel like throwing up.

but love is all what would come out.

you hear shuffling over the phone. a soft grunt and more of what sounds like him moving around.

"satoru..?" you whisper, still scared that you've somehow upset him, made him mad with the tiniest bit of your affection, not knowing that it's all he ever thinks about.

"i wanna see you, too." his ears feel warm, so does his heart. you're all he thinks about. "don't hang up."

"i wouldn't dare."

[merakiui]

welcome to the day a duck ruins your perception of items in genshin impact. i uh. made some items in genshin impact as yandere boys and what they're like sort of?? you could try and burn your eyes now. ;) adepti seekers stove- he's going to be a tsundere no buts or uhts. he's the type of yandere that's trying to be protective and failing miserably everytime. so being impatient and angsty. so, he resorts in kidnapping you instead. but hey look on the bright side! even when you're kidnapped you can have delicious meals and snacks! secretly likes to cook for you a lot, but he won't admit it even in death. just don't question why there's a lingering scent of sleeping potions in your meal and you'll be good as jolly jee! probably wants you to help him in the kitchen, since he once heard that couples do that. would probably give you self esteem issues down the line. "didn't i tell you to not get hurt? are you that much of an idiot?? here. have this it'll lessen the pain just a bit so we can walk back home. just drink it already." windsong lyre- smug bastard, smug shit. he's probably a player or just overly dramatic with everything. maybe he's righteous or something.. likes to show off his music skills a lot. he sucks at it tho. gaslights you probably in public places to add more pressure, because people are staring like you're having a performance or something. calls you love even if he's pissed at you for not listening to him, or accusing him of being toxic or suspecting him of being your stalker that always watches you from your window at 2am! would make you paranoid a lot. loves kissing your cheek and tickling you. he's a closeted pervert. you're gonna have to move in an isolated place too, he will spread rumours of you being his lover. "love, I'm sure that you're just overreacting. plus even if i was the stalker that you're talking about I wouldn't be oh so casually talking to you in public when I could've been hiding! jeez it's like your going crazy." wind-blessed harpastrum- such sweety! just so wholesome bakes you a pie in tuesday sweet. seems patient too but beware he will break your legs when you get a little bit too bratty for his tastes. touch starved too and it shows, that's why he loves to cuddle you lots! really obsessed with what you think of him. if you say you hate him he'll tear up and try to convince you that he's good, but if you pretend that you like him he'll shower you with uncomfortable affection and confessions. really great at making bombs and torture weapons too. probably sewed in a bomb inside your body threatened that he will kill you with it if you leave. bad at darts and archery. if you say that to him he'll laugh and take out his diploma saying that he's too smart for those childish games. he's impulsive in decision making. "haha. you know. you almost escaped from me back there. but hey! now you won't do anything stupid like that ever again if you can't walk." windblume balloon: listen man. im going to be killed but he's an airhead, pun intended right there. probably lowkey manipulative and doesn't even know it yet or chooses to ignore it. protective of you a lot. really delusional to the point that he rationalizes your escape as someone kidnapping you. so say goodbye to whoever poor stranger who was trying to help you escape they'll be greeted by an arrow through their head once he finds you. has a habit of holding your hand because he's afraid you might disappear from his line of sight and leave him all alone. if you let go tho he'll gorilla grip your hand, might crush it too. just very overprotective. he also doesn't know that he's an airhead. yeah."hm? why do i like holding you hand..? i just like it.. your hand makes me feel... uh. safe..? is that the word for it? ah. it was the word loved." wind catcher- he's a full on sadist. throw all of your escape plans out the window, this guy will climb a mountain and ride any wind current available to catch and torture you. persistently trying to make you like him atleast a bit. yeah, he's that kind of delusional. would teasingly push you

of a cliff as a 'light' punishment. dark humour and likes to joke about killing you from time to time. note: he can kill you. and he would also do it by ripping you in half with the wind current so just stay in his house and be a good lover that'll shower him in kisses, okay? okay. he mostly sees you as a tool of interest, but not just any tool- you're his favourite tool. "pfft! hey stop crying now! you're making me feel bad! hm? oh? why am i doing this? well i mean maybe I'm angry that someone was trying to escape. again." warming bottle- he will absolutely leave you in the cold if you were being a brat towards him. lives in dragonspine to spite you, also because he can just turn take away your blankets and anything that can give warmth so you gotta ask him to cuddle you to survive. he usually does this when he's feeling a little petty. which is so frequent. that you can almost give it a schedule. but don't tell him that. kind of a tsundere but only when it comes to physical affection since he's shy. that's why he has to take away your blankets so it looks like he's just mocking you but not because he's touch starved. he's not at home that much too but don't worry, he will make it up to you by uh.. physical activities.. "what? you're freezing? no shit we're in dragonspine. oh? you want me to hug you..? hm. fine. I'll indulge you for a bit. I am quite merciful." parametric transformer- businessman that scams you a lot lol. he's going to be a masochist because i said so, yeah i know the electric stone thing gag that's why i made him a masochist. really likes to collect useless stuff and spoiling you, so expect your room to be filled with a lot of random things from jewelry to mushrooms and crabs. has a you should be grateful i even give stuff mindset. thinks that giving someone something of vaue would make them fall in love with him instantly. also probably loves it when you fight back especially when you successfully land a hit on him, he will enjoy it. but be careful he has different responses whenever you hit him. pick your poison. spends a ton of resources on everything to keep you in line. that rope costed him 700 pinecones. "why do you even wanna escape? i give you a ton of stuff so you won't get bored! hah. maybe if i had picked up someone else they would've been grateful." portable waypoint- throw out your escape plans the season sequel. he's very quiet but has a small temper that won't last that much. maybe he's like that since he tries so hard to repress it. listen he's trying okay? escape always fails so quickly. one minute you're in springvale shouting, crying, begging for anyone to help you and then back to his house to see him sipping some tea. his punishments are cruel too- he makes sure to leave you in a den of monsters and ruin guards, waits until your in the brink of death and teleports you back to him. has a superiority complex over everyone too. probably likes to make you feel weak when you have to rely on him. loves to crush your self esteem. wants to be affectionate but thinks that you, as an inferior being, should be affectionate with him instead. so tsun. "see? this is what i was trying to tell you. you're too weak to actually survive out there. you even had to rely on me to save you. pathetic." memento lens- mysterious and elegant. he's quite cryptic to say the least. likes to watch you from a far if he's feeling a bit angsty. you try to make sense of what he says and it just leads to you being confused even more. and he likes that about you. you actually try to understand him, even if what you guess is wrong. you're going to have a tough time with this guy if you wanna escape. just avoid any fox statues and you'll be good. the problem is the shrine maidens. they basically want the two of you to end up together so they don't have to deal with him. he's actually very gentle with you punishments still suck but atleast he doesn't do it physically, he just makes you write that you're sorry over and over until your wrist are tired. loves poetry and solving puzzles, riddles, scriptures. he's

smart but soft. "spring blossoms even in the darkest depths of uncertainty, is that why you have the courage to try and escape me..?" kamera- perfectionist stalker. wants to make sure that the photos he takes of you are perfect to every extent. colour, lighting, and expressions. even if it means going inside your room and having the possibility of waking you up from your sleep. likes to take pictures of everything too. kind of like this; both of you are walking somewhere and he stops to take a picture of a sunset. he takes twenty minutes trying to find the correct angle. but the sun is already gone so he sulks. maybe- you can cheer him up by volunteering to be his model? you'll do that? right? also worships you like a god so if someone dared to even say something breath near you or celestia forbid insult you, best to say they'll be quickly disposed of by blackmail and fake shit. would not steal any of your belongings, he would just take pictures of it. so he's not that bad. "i consider everything in this world is beautiful, but you have surpassed that. so that is why im keeping you here. no one deserves even a glimpse of you!" waverider toolbox- he's such a gentlemen and a sweetheart. always there to help you with repairs, sometimes he'd add some updates to it too. just ignore the stuff going missing inside your boat thing. he probably guilt-gaslight you into staying with him in his waverider then bam your in an island stranded. ahaha, now both of you just have to survive by working together ya know? like a loving couple likes hugs and physical affection a lot! bonus points if it's given when he's tired from doing his job. as i said tired guy so appreciates all the things you do for him whether it's paying for his meal or giving him a gift. next time, he'll make sure that you won't leave the island permanently. thinks that stranded island equals date smh. " ahh? oh! is this for me? really? thank you.. i don't usually receive gifts but that just makes this even more special! say, do you wanna go on a trip? i just fixed the waverider from last time." red feather fan- mischievous little shit. likes to scare you a lot by appearing on trees and just jumping on you. knows that you're trying to escape but pretends not to since he likes to try and guess which direction you would run to. hugs you a lot even before he kidnaps you really touchy even if you say no he'll use the good ol puppy eyes! doesn't work? okay he'll just smell your clothes when you're sleeping as compensation. he likes to flirt with you a lot. some pickup are cheesy.. but others are a little- personal? acts cool by making a dramatic entrance everytime even. you know those radical superhero landing stuff? that's him. he would build a nest as your house even being a dick and placing it on top of a mountain, goodluck on trying to get down. "caught you! going to the shore was so predictable by the way. maybe you should try a different place next time, dear? hm? maybe a restaurant so we can have date? sounds great right?" serenitea pot- unhinged malewife that wants to make a the perfect living space for you- ehem. probably a perfectionist if you squint hard enough. he's delusional but just a little lucid about the stuff he does to you. likes to make a ton of furniture too! personalized the room you're trapped in with a ton of valuable and expensive materials. just don't try to escape he'll cut your limbs off just like a damn tree shawtie. owns a shit ton of pets ranging from boars to cats. all of them are like bodyguards to you during your stay. dreams about having a peaceful life with you in the realm someday, sigh. he sometimes has burnouts where he just places a bunch of furniture on a single room and call it a day. "and here is your room! do.. do you like it? i made it just for you! i didn't know what wood you would prefer so i just settled on whatever i can find! ahaha. we're kind of like a married couple living together now... right?" nre menu- he's probably going to be from the adventurers guild. really awkward and shy. takes for him a long time to

open up to you. when going on quests he's the one in charge of carrying the food and healing shit you need. really patient and nice! slightly uh mean with other people trying to talk to you but other than that everything is normal. everything is normal the long loving gaze he gives you every now and then and some food being left on your doorstep. yeah let's not question it i mean he's just so shy! he would never do anything wrong? right?? he's a closeted pervert, cliche i know but he's a pervert with a line to not cross. he just checks you out. good for him. would cry if given any ounce of affection. sweet baby. "t-that was a tough commission.. oh u-uh.. do you need some food to replenish your energy? we need to do the other commissions you know.. hm? why aren't you eating it.. something wrong with the food..?" seelies- spoiled. that's the word to describe him. really straight forward with his courting kind of dumb? but he's so damn lucky for some unknown reason that your plans to avoid him always fail. yeah the high quality rope you just bought for 1000 mora? it broke and you fell into his arms. he's probably rich by sheer dumb luck too. finds a ton treasure chests even in the places you didn't expect. people pressure you into spending time with him. since he's just so cute! how could say no to such a face? it really feels like the gods are on his side ya know? he throws a lot of very very aggressive tantrums if you're not with him. thinks he's doing a good job at courting you, with rationalize rejection as a playing hard to get. "tada! look i got you this crystal i found while i was walking! it looks like a diamond and it has a ton of colours too?? is it valuable?? would you kiss me if i give it to you??" endora- majestic, regal, and likes to explore a lot. he uh. probably trapped you in a bubble once or twice too. really curious about his surroundings, also has no personal space since it's first time going out. he would cuddle you when he feels like it homie. kidnapped you and made you his tour guide. don't try to fool him he learns quickly about stuff. fast swimmer, so no joining any expeditions in water if you don't want their ship to be wrecked by a mysterious being of the teyvat seas. he likes to see you cry. it's not a kink he just feels connected to you when you cry. doesn't have a house so you just live in a run down boat. he's doesn't know when you're lying to him sometimes. god complex bastard. "this world. at first i wasn't sure if i was going to like it or not, but ever since I've met you... I've grown to tolerate some parts.. so you should be thankful, you've convinced me. mortal." intertwined fate/older twin- listen. he's just so smug about everything he does. and he knows you love him. probably invites you out on dinner only for him to not show up. so basically he's an asshole without a doubt. toxic boyfriend that gives you false hope and has a ton of admirers. you probably think he won't settle for you right? ah, he's not that cruel. so picks you as his lover out of all the billions of people. you should be grateful! he even kidnapped you! do you know how hard it was for him to go all the way from his home to yours? anyways yeah. asshole. he likes to do the open the door for darling trick where he just gives you a small crack on the door and watch you make a decision. it's an act of your loyalty. if you escape he'll make you feel pain. if you don't then he'll reward your patience. god complex bastard 2."sigh. did you try to escape? again? patience is the key to everything you know. maybe you should learn that. i expected more smart from you." acquaint fate/younger twin- cinnamonroll he's such a sweet guy. he's always there for you when you need him. okay- he has a nice guy complex, fucking damn it. probably uses the but I've been there for you since the start trick unintentionally a lot. he just doesn't know he wants some action, so be thankful that he didn't just jump on you like a barbarian. he's kind of contradicting himself too. one hand he wants you to love him, on the other hand he doesn't

believe he deserves you. loves to give you the same things, remember that one painting you liked from two years ago? he got you that. quantity beats quality. surprisingly, he's really patient but would have bursts of anger every now and then. has a self value issues?? yeah, but did i tell you he's a touch starved guy. punshments are just him softly lecturing you about what's good and what's wrong."i always viewed myself as inferior, that i didn't deserve anything.. but this time. i want to be greedy just once." that's it- :'D i haven't proofread this but here you go mer! ill probably continue with more humanisations of items in genshin later.. if you ask why i ruined your day with this crazy idea i was watching that one video of a person humanising social media and got this idea. also i discovered how to bold out texts... i have power..ejwjdhshaj

so yeah have a great day! -🦆anon

I AM IN AWE?!?! WHOA OMG!!!!! 🦆, THIS IS FANTASTIC!! AAAAAA (≧∀≦)

All of the various characterizations… *chef’s kiss* It’s literally so good! With each one I read I kept thinking okay this guy is my favorite and then I would read the next description and my heart was stolen again. I can’t pick a favorite now. T_T