#they want to get to the point that they can justify butchering as much of it as possible to private entities

[zanmor]

And they're doing their damndest to make it happen at the post office.

[butchsophiewalten]

i'm sure you've answered stuff like this before, but do you think sophie is genuinely rude/antagonistic on purpose? i genuinely think she's a contrarian who does her best to push people away but she's also just not well equipped for social situations

Please never apologize for asking me about Sophie Walten characterization, it is one of my favorite things in the entire world to talk about, and I love this question. I like this outlook on her quite a lot, and I do a lot of thinking about this exact sort of thing. Like, how much of her standoffish behavior is her being antagonistic, and how much of it is just her reaction to feeling antagonized?

As you do, I do like to think it's somewhere in the middle, where her behavior is largely because she's been through a lot and people have treated her poorly, but I also definitely think she's got a bit of an itchy trigger, and tends to assume the worst, and does a lot of lashing out at people in ways that aren't often justified. In my mind I also see some of her behavior as bring driven by a lack of social awareness, where she does things that are rude or impolite without knowing, which I think would happen most often with Jenny. But I also definitely don't think it's always out of ignorance. Sometimes she really is just trying to hurt people.

I've always liked the idea that Sophie sometimes really revels in her status as a Social Pariah. I think past the point of grief about her lack of identity and social connection, she likes the idea that people see her as creepy and unapproachable, or as the kind of person who hurts people just because she wants to and can. Maybe not necessarily knowingly, but I think she uses that as a way to protect herself from people who would hurt her, either intentionally, or unintentionally just as a consequence of being part of her life.

Funnily enough I see that idea reflected in the Fun Fact that Martin gave forever ago, about The Muppet Show probably being her favorite television program, but she'd never tell that to anyone. It's fun to me, imagining her seeing it as discordant to her Persona. She's supposed to like Slasher Horror and she butchers animals for a living and gets into fights. Liking The Muppet Show isn't going to make people afraid of her.

[atopvisenyashill]

the chapter i’m on - asos sansa ii - is interesting bc it’s cited as an instance of sansa being cruel, classist, a bully, whatever, in her thoughts of arya but that is such a surface level reading it’s maddening to think people look at it that way.

sansa isn’t thinking “i’d much rather have margaery as a sister” she’s thinking around how much she grieves for arya, and her own guilty feelings over not seeing through joffrey quick enough. it’s really clear:

“how can i let my sister marry joffrey” she thinks as she’s crying, just seconds after thinking about arya and attempting to distance herself from hurtful memories. she’s not just scared for margaery, she is thinking of arya in margaery’s place. she is thinking of how joffrey hurt arya and how sansa had stood there and yelled at arya, not joffrey (which i don’t think is a failing of hers; a drunk 11 year old reacting badly to a wildly stressful situation is not a moral failing). she’s thinking about how she can’t stand there and do nothing again when she can save margaery the way she couldn’t save arya and all she has to do is speak up.

she’s just not saying it directly because she deals with stress by repressing her memories. she thinks around a stressful subject instead of naming it in her mind. thinking of arya and the possibility that she’s dead and the last time they spoke they were fighting, all of that is too painful, so instead she focuses on wanting to protect margaery.

then, with arya on her mind, she finally lets herself acknowledge some of her pain while she’s alone:

“sometimes there was even a girl who looked like arya” is the point of this chapter! she has sons to please willas but the little girl she imagines with him belongs to sansa and sansa alone. and in her dreams, that girl looks like the sister she’s lost. in her dreams, her entire family is reunited. in her dreams, she realized joffrey was a monster earlier and she saves arya and lady and nymeria from him and she gets to be the brave, noble lady of her songs.

the crazy thing is that this has happened before and people understood it then: ned does this constantly.

the most obvious one comes early and you can see clearly he does the exact same thing of thinking around who his thoughts have really strayed to:

“you can’t get your hands on this one, can you?” he is clearly thinking about jon. he is testing to see if robert has changed any over the years, if maybe jon isn’t in that much danger and ned had just discredited robert’s heart too much over the years. only for robert to rage about dany, justify the butchering of elia & her babies, and confirm all of ned’s worst fears are still true. jon will never be safe in westeros if his identity were to be known and ned made the right decision to lie all these years. it’s such an important scene in establishing ned’s character and the show does an equally good job of implying what ned is really thinking.

Beyond being an excellent masterclass in acting during this scene, it comes immediately after Ned has said goodbye to Jon and promised they’d speak of his mother when they reunite. There’s a clear link that we’re meant to make between the scene before and this one despite Ned steadfastedly refusing to think Lyanna or Jon’s names. It’s the same with Arya; we’re meant to link Sansa’s sudden terror for Margaery with her feelings for Arya.

With both Ned and Sansa, a lot of their true thoughts are in what they don’t think and not what they tell you they’re thinking. They lie to themselves and they lie to you and the “trap” is to recognize this and piece together how they really feel.

[deliciouskeys]

So I liked what we have of season 4 a lot?! I don't know if I set my expectations really low, maybe didn't expect to get that fandom feeling back, but I think I can say with certainty that I've enjoyed e1-3 of s4 more than e1-3 of s3, and mayyyyyybe even more than e1-3 of s2. Some of the storylines don't interest me, but that was true of prior seasons too.

Things I am loving so far...

(under cut because there may be teensy weensy spoiler references)

Sister Sage! Yes, she says the lines that are in the trailer, but they are so misleading about the type of character she is. I LOVE her so far.

Homelander's frustration with being adored no matter what he does and his ennui about being surrounded with sycophants (which tbf, he engineered). I am SO glad they're walking that back to some degree. Related to point 1 above, I am delighted by the way he goes about solving this problem.

Every single scene with Ryan is so fucking good?? Like, Cameron Crovetti is the ideal Ryan of my mind's eye when I write fic. I feel SO bad for him. But I am loving the divorced plot and them jockeying to be his dad. Some of it reads like fucking fic, in a good way too. Like I can't believe the conversation between HL and Ryan after he comes back from Butcher's place actually happened on TV and not in my head.

I am actually SO SO happy they decided to outsource Billy Butcher's shitty tendencies to his Tyler Durden. I did not expect him to fucking apologize to Ryan for the S3 debacle. Even ~I~ felt apologized to for that "necessary for the plot but makes zero sense outburst".

I am loling every time Noir speaks. I don't know why, but I'm finding it hilarious.

I think they're actually doing a good job with A-Train's storyline, or a better job than I expected to justify how he becomes their new double agent.

I'm enjoying Chace Crawford's work in season 4. I like that he's sincere about the comic relief role.

Hughie is so charismatic, and for the first time in 4 seasons I think he elicited tears in me (in the scene right before his mom shows up when he's listening to his dad's messages).

I like Ashley's dialogue more this season than season 3. Part of that may have to do with me enjoying her character when she's angry rather than scared shitless or "trying to imitate HL"

I welcome the larger Victoria Neumann presence, and can't wait to see more about her past.

I enjoyed BIlly Butcher using a crowbar in a fight

I enjoyed seeing Antony Starr playing a mommy and a daddy and a.... secret third thing in the mirror.

What I'm meh about...

I hate to say this but the Boys' storylines are mostly dragging and feel disconnected. I'm already tired of Frenchie and Kimiko refusing to talk to each other and attempting to drink/drug their problems away. The mystery about why Frenchie is distraught was mostly solved right away, and Kimiko's mystery is still some derivative of her backstory in S2. It just doesn't feel connected.

Mother's Milk is fine, but I do think his character took a turn toward the unreasonable in season 3, and it has sort of continued. It's not clear to me why he's kicking Butcher out of the team multiple times, especially when Butcher saves them, and clearly has nothing better to do with his time. It feels especially cruel to kick him out when he tells him about the terminal illness.

Annie's storyline is.... fine, I guess. Maybe it will develop into something more interesting, but it feels like the writers don't exactly know what to do with her now that she's out of the Seven. I don't know why Firecracker had to have a personal vendetta against Starlight beyond being a symbol of 'wokeness'. I guess I'll wait to see if Annie's meangirl past becomes relevant as the season goes on.

Firecracker is okay. I'm amused that Homelander seems bored and annoyed by her, so I take it it's fine if we feel the same way too. It's certainly an interesting addition to the Seven to have someone so underpowered.

Hughie's mom frustrates me so much I wanted HL to come and laser her instead of Hughie after that chase. Her explanation made it worse for me, not better. I await to be proven wrong, but so far I think Hughie is being a really kind person to her. "Your father didn't want me to talk to you". But you were allegedly talking to him for years? And you son is in his 20s, I think you could have contacted without his daddy's say-so. UGH.

I don't really care about this so much, because I don't like character deaths, but it is pretty funny when Vicky doesn't kill Hughie or Butcher, and when Homelander is nerfed beyond all belief and is unable to laser Hughie in a closed space. I'll chalk it up to him losing a step or fifty with the enlargement of his prostate.

[ettawrites]

Hello, can I request Tobirama Senju with a reader who is actually Harmonia, Greek Goddess of Harmony and Concord, daughter of Aphrodite and Ares.

The story is Harmonia travels around the earth under a fake name of reader(Y/N) Namikaze. Tobirama fell in love for her after she had saved him from a near death battle and they had one child named Minato Namikaze. But one day on their supposed engagement day, her father(Ares) told reader(Harmonia) that Tobirama died in a battle. A heartbroken Reader(Harmonia) had to raise baby Minato on her own inside a village she never knew well.

I apologize if it’s too much to ask…

Might’ve butchered this but bare with me okay 😫 I hope you like it (hopefully? Maybe?)

- also fyi, was not too much to ask for, your requests are not too much don’t be silly.

I Miss Him (Tobirama Angst)

Warning: angst + swearing

It was dark, frigid and damp where the two strangers sat. A light green glow came from the woman's hands as she placed them over a wound of the broad stoic man.

The battle was long over, the wounds still remained as they waited out the heavy rain that fell over the land.

“I would thank you but you don’t have an allied headband, in fact no headband,” The man pointed out, his lips turned in a frown. It looked like that’s all his mouth could do, just frown with displeased eyes.

“Where I come from there is no such thing as these silly headbands, they are just metal on fabric,” She spoke, clearly not pleased by the lack of gratitude. The man only scoffed, swatting her hand away.

“It’s a symbol of loyalty, how can you not comprehend that? You clearly don’t seem stupid from how skilled you were on the battlefield,” Tobirama's voice was firm, a hidden compliment seeping through.

She didn’t respond to that, sitting back against the cave walls as the fire crackled. Their faces were illuminating from the flame, eyes heavy with thick emotion- there was a deep tension that was unsettling to them both.

“Tobirama,” He spoke, she looked at him dumbfounded.

“My name is Tobirama Senju,”

“Oh,” Was all she said, the name sitting on her mind once she learnt it. The man grew impatient, not liking her lack of reaction nor response.

“Well? Your name, women?” Tobirama spat, clearly irked.

“(Y/N) Namikaze,” you had replied, like it wasn’t anything special or meant anything.

“Hm,” Was all he said, and that was the start of it all.

It had been a year since the two had first met, they had gone their separate ways that night but every so often they would find each other. Whether it was in a village or a trail, or even a couple of times on the battlegrounds.

These meetings had been assumed to be fate by Tobirama, who could not get you out of his head. But for you, they were planned.

Your father had advised you not to fall for a human, especially one with so much power and influence. But what words of a father could persuade a daughter so madly in love?

It only took the 5th meeting for Tobirama to come out with it, he had a couple drinks in his system and the right amount of impatience to just ask.

You both were away from the eyes of his comrades, the bar was alive and did not miss the two slipping away.

“I believe the universe as a way of telling you where they want you,” He said, the red paint on his cheeks were smudged.

“And I always- always thought my place was strictly for the ninja world, but god damn it (Y/N),” Tobirama’s voice was thick, but it didn’t hold any anger in it.

His hands were gentle as they cupped your cheek, fingers even more so as he threaded them through your hair. He was taller, much taller and everything about him was just so justifiably well written- like he wasn’t even real.

The kiss was expected, yet so good. It was firm and sweet, a bit desperate and well waited for.

“You are where I am supposed to be,” his words muttered against your warm lips, a hint of whiskey on his breath.

“Tobirama;” Came your irked voice, a frown on your lips as you walked into the unfinished room.

“Okay..-“ Tobirama started, trying to defend himself as half the room was coloured in blue.

“Shut it! I said I wanted green for the nursery, this is not green is it?” You crossed your arms over your chest, your belly swollen under the dress you wore.

“Well blue is a part of green is it not?” It was a smug reply, which made it worse considering he was walking closer to try and embrace you.

“Do not touch me,” You spat, pointing your finger at him. His lips were in a grin, nowadays that’s all his mouth could do. A smile with bright eyes.

“You don’t mean that,” Tobirama whispered, one of his hands cradling your face with the other placed firmly on your stomach. He kissed your pout, then the top of your head. “I’ll change it after our party tomorrow,”

Tobirama had left early the next morning, apologizing over and over for being asked to do a mission. it was a supposed simple one, he promised it would be quick and he’d be back in time for the party to celebrate your one year anniversary.

When the knock on your door came you were confused, it unfortunately had turned out to be a dreary day and you rushed to open the door for whoever was standing out in the rain. It was assumed to be a friend that had come to help get you ready.

“Harmonia…” you hadn’t heard that name in a long time, nor that face. You blinked, seeing the solemn look on your fathers face. Your heart sunk deep into your stomach, so deep your baby boy had kicked in discomfort too.

“What? What happened?” You panicked, cheeks flushed and mind heavy. Your world was spinning when your father had announced your lover was dead.

It was the strangest thing, you had saw his lips move but his voice hadn’t reached your ears. There was this loud silence all around you, the hammering of your heart beating to it.

You sat for a long time, long after your father left and you stayed in the kitchen til morning came. The sun rose, illuminating the wooden table and it felt warm against your cold skin. You rose, slowly walking upstairs to the nursery.

The room that was left unfinished, the white wall half painted with blue. You could only cry, your body crumbling to your knees as you cried so loudly til your voice gave out and you fell asleep from exhaustion on the floor.

“You look pretty,” Came Minato's voice, he had begged you to get out the photo book for him. You were in the kitchen, stirring the pot of stew on the stove.

You wandered over to where he sat in the living room, your fingers threading through his yellow locks. The seven year old was referring to your wedding photo, his finger slightly tracing over where Tobirama stood in it.

“You think so?” You mused, sitting next to him. He nodded, a smile on his face and all you could see was your late husband in that warm expression.

“Of course, you always look pretty but you looked really beautiful in that photo, dad must have been happy,”

Ever since Minato had learned snippets of his father, he always brought him up whenever it seemed fit. He was curious, of course he was curious he had never met the man.

“He was, for such a stoic man I swore he cried when I walked down the aisle,” You told your son, flipping to the next page.

“That’s him crying when I told him I was pregnant with you,” a laugh escaped you at the memory, the photo was a bit blurry but it was clear to be Tobirama with tears in his eyes and a hand extended to try and stop you.

Minato laughed too once he saw it, then he had closed the book and set it aside. His fists were bunched up on his knees, shoulders slumped.

You frowned, your hand caressing his back. You knew he was upset and it pained you to see it.

“Is it weird for me to miss him? Even though I never met him…?” Tiny tears welled up in his eyes, escaping down his cheek and you gently wiped them away.

“It’s not weird baby, it’s normal I promise,” you whispered, bringing him to your chest as he latched onto your tightly. You hugged him, your cheek pressed into the top of his head.

“I really miss him,” His words muffled into your sweater, for a little kid his grip was strong.

“I miss him too,” You replied, your eyes glossy. It was hard, living in this village without Tobirama; raising his boy he never got to meet. It wasn’t supposed to be just you and your boy, alone together.

For the goddess of Harmony your life was not balanced, ever since Tobirama had passed you felt your heart had a small empty spot; he must had taken it with him. Or perhaps you didn’t reside as that goddess anymore? Maybe that was a curse by the fate for deciding to fall for a human. Even though it was short lived and left you heart broken, the time that you did spent together was worth ever second.

[katyawriteswhump]

the power of love part 7 (steddie, stobin, steve whump fic)

Steve has a habit of surviving near death experiences then getting sick for no reason. And Eddie and those fatal bat bites? After an impossible feat of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation from Steve, he’s mysteriously fixed. So, Eddie’s back to being banished, this time with Steve and Robin in tow. Eddie’s healing, but Steve isn’t… and life gets even more confusing, when Eddie develops feelings for Steve, which aren’t entirely unrequited.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

(also on AO3 here)

Chapter Seven

Eddie POV

Steve insists on being pathfinder lead for the next hour. 

Eddie’s gotta admit—following Steve, as he thrashes his way through the undergrowth, is the best entertainment that banishment has provided yet. Steve’s tight-fitting pants don't do any harm. Goddammit, the perspiration patches on Steve’s shirt make Eddie sweat even harder than Steve is.

“You need the fedora hat,” calls Robin, “and you’ve totally nailed the junior Indiana Jones look.”

Steve smirks over his shoulder. “I was channelling that guy out of Romancing the Stone.” 

“Michael Douglas? No way as hot.” Eddie flashes his best flirtatious grin with ever greater confidence. This afternoon, Steve has begun returning them. “Stick to Indy, man.”

By the time they reach the logging camp, however, they’re all beyond exhausted.

Eddie’s feet are raw with blisters, and Robin’s been complaining of the same for the past hour. She limps through the door of the first cabin they come to, which fortunately turns out to be a bunkhouse. She throws down her pack then throws herself onto the bottom of one of two sets of bunks. Steve collapses onto the other lower bunk and appears to fall instantly asleep.

Eddie considers crawling up onto one of the top bunks and seeing if sleep takes pity on him.

He doubts it would. The choppers were a stark reminder of the nightmare reality snapping at his heels, and he’s wired as hell. He begins to unpack their supplies. Robin, having taken a moment, sits back up.

“We should check this place out,” she whispers. “There must be a clean water supply somewhere, maybe a generator. Definitely canned food and that kinda stuff, for when the loggers come back in the autumn.” 

“I guess it’ll make a change from cardboard-flavoured cereal.”

“God, I know, right! I’d literally murder for some Count Chocular right now.”

They split up to search the various cabins. Eddie hits the jackpot first, in the guise of a crate of bottled beer. 

“Seriously?” says Robin, when she meets him outside the bunkhouse. Eddie sits on the beer crate he’s dragged out, taking a well-earned rest. “You’re gonna get buzzed?”

“You got it in one, sister.”

He doesn’t feel the need to justify this—I saw Chrissy butchered in front of my eyes. I’ve spent a week on the run from the cops. I BASICALLY DIED IN A WHIRLWIND OF EVIL KILLER DEMOBATS. And now I’m on the run again, with Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington, and I’ve fallen stupid hard for him. Oh, and there’s a small but real possibility he’s been flayed. Or something else freaky along those lines.

Robin hasn’t quit scowling at him. His smile is the first overtly false one he’s bothered with for a while:

“Forgive me, Robin. I’ve reached the point where, to quote my sweet old Granny—there ain’t nothin’ fuckin’ like it for me nerves. ’Course, she favoured hard liquor.” He offers one of two bottles he’s gotten out to Robin. “Want one?”

“I’ll stick to the cardboard cereal.” Her scowl lessens, though she remains deadly serious. “Look, promise me you won’t give too much to Steve.”

“Why?”

“What kinda pea-brain question is that? Despite the super-commando act, he’s still struggling, it’s totally obvious. Getting trashed is not gonna help.”

“Yeah, but… he’s improving, right?” Her slight wince betrays that, once again, they’re thinking the same thing. Perhaps Steve’s getting stronger, because he’s getting closer again to Lover’s Lake, Hawkins, Vecna, the Hive-Mind, and yet… “You know our little worst-case scenario, Rob? I’m still not buying it.”

The wind rustles the nearby trees. In sync, Robin’s hunched shoulders soften a little. “Me neither. Hand on heart, if Steve had a link to that evil shit, any at all, I’d sense it by now. Although… Was it just me who thought it was weird when the choppers came over, and then it suddenly clouded up?”

“Yeeeeaah, that really was just you. I was too busy eating dirt and shitting myself.” Now he thinks about it, mind, it was darn convenient.

She shrugs. “I guess I’m super-paranoid that way. I literally spent my Middle School years spotting aliens everywhere.”

“You’re kidding?”

“Then I realised they weren’t aliens. It was the Fae all along.”

“You sure it wasn’t dragons?”

“Now you’re being ridiculous.” Her laugh sounds as manic as his latest crazy smile. On the other hand:

“Maybe Steve really is getting better naturally,” he ventures, “and the set-backs are because he’s been overdoing it. I mean, yeah, we keep an eye out for anything cuckoo, watch for connections, make sure he takes rests, but… Time heals, huh?”

“Not always.” She purses her lips, veering straight back into scary mode. “Steve doesn’t like people to know, but since his second major concussion, he’s not supposed to drink. Of course, he does sometimes, but—”

“Message received. I’ll just have the one—for medicinal purposes, ’kay?” 

“Please yourself. Then wake Steve long enough to put our own bedding on those disgusting bunks. I don’t wanna be bitten to death by bed bugs.”

Robin stomps off toward the camp generator. Eddie is executing the important business of prying the top off his beer, when Steve appears, leaning in the cabin doorway. “Why did you both let me… Hey, is that beer?”

The top pops off with a treacherous fizz. “Uh, no?”

“You’re a useless liar.” Steve closes in. His messy, sleep-mussed hair renders him totally edible. 

“You got me.” Eddie darts his tongue nervously across his lips. “This indeed is the amber nectar of the Gods. You want some?” 

There’s a skewed logic behind Eddie’s offer. If he told Steve he couldn’t drink, like he was his mom or something, Steve would probably get mad. He opts to play a good cop, bad cop routine with Robin, who… 

Eddie glances toward the generator.

She’s not there. If bad cop isn’t gonna show, then he needs a Plan B.

“I guess I’ll have one.” Steve stretches to take the bottle. 

“Just gonna test it. Been here a while.” 

Eddie takes a glug, splutters it out across dusty ground. “Oh man, it’s worse than cat-piss.” He’s only slightly exaggerating. “There’s a reason those lumberjacks left this garbage behind.”

Steve yawns into the back of his hand. “Gonna be honest. I’m not supposed to drink anyhow. Long story.” Ooookay. That went easier than predicted. “Got any water left?”

“Yeah. By my pack.” Eddie hurries into the bunkhouse, and Steve follows. It’s the last bottle, so he hopes Robin’s busy locating fresh supplies. Though that proves the least of his worries.

Half a minute later, he’s sitting on the edge of a bunk, thigh-to-thigh with Steve. They pass the bottle of water and a bottle of beer between them.

And being this close to Steve, now Steve seems so much better? Exchanging chitchat about how long they can hideout here, and if any of them have the skills to hunt a deer or something?

It sends tingles up and down Eddie’s spine.

The way Steve looks at him underlines exactly why Steve was angry last night, when Eddie “assumed” he was straight. Eddie suddenly can’t look Steve in the eye. Trouble is, he then can’t stop staring at Steve’s mouth—those shapely, slightly chapped lips, moist and glistening with water and bad beer.

Then Steve blindsides him with: “Do you honestly think you died, Eddie? Before I did the CPR?”

“I dunno, Harrington.” Eddie squirms on his butt, all kinds of defences flying up. “It was like a dream. Apart from that, it wasn't a dream. It was a place, and Dustin was there, and Robin was there, and you were there, too.”

“Wow. Seriously?”

Eddie cackles out a mocking laugh. “I’m misquoting ‘The Wizard of Oz,’ dude.”

“Oh.” Eddie glances sidelong. Steve appears… oddly crestfallen. “It’s just… You know, I said when I get hurt, I feel like I come back different each time. I mean, I don't know if it's true or not, but... I never knew you before... and I know you now and... and…” Steve fluffs his hair. “Jesus, I’m blabbering.”

“Nah,” says Eddie. “You sound like you’re getting somewhere.” 

Compared to the meltdown my brain is having.

“Okay, well, here it is. I like you, Eddie. I really like you.”��

Eddie half wants to flee for the hills. He fixes on a beetle scuttling across the dirty floorboards. “Dude, you sure you’re not in love with Wheeler?”

“I… I… No!”  Steve doesn’t sound angry, only bewildered. “Yeah, I believed that once, and maybe I was. I guess she fitted in so many dreams I’ve had of my future, and I owe her a lot. But now I’m with you, and…” Their eyes finally meet. Steve’s earnest warmth sends a brutal shockwave through Eddie. “I know this seems fickle, but…” His gentle laugh is too much. “Who knows? Perhaps it’s because Nance has never been dead. Or, near dead. You know, we’ve gotten that in common, right?”

“Riiiiight,” Eddie says, stupidly, then, “Screw it, I like you too, Stevie. I really like you.” 

They fling their arms around each other, and tumble into the kiss.

For Eddie, the sensations are like no make-out session before, such is the hunger that zings between them. Eddie’s so blown away, that the brush of Steve’s lips seems to kindle an actual crackling, electric friction..  Damn, the boy can kiss! 

Eddie’s gotten a semi already, fingers threading up through Steve’s hair, toying at the nape of his neck. Steve does amazing twisty things with his tongue. Gnng! You wanna kill me again, Baby? Even the scrape of Steve’s shallow stubble totally unhinges him.

They work the kiss with their whole bodies, striving to get beyond close, as if they could slide beneath each other’s skin. Eddie can’t help wondering—can they get each other off, before Robin gets back?

Then something changes.

He senses Steve gasp, then moan into Eddie's mouth with something other than dumb teen passion. His arms, clinging around Eddie, falter and slip away.

“Stevie?”

Too late. Steve crumples against Eddie, totally senseless. 

“Steve?” squeaks Eddie, struggling to stop Steve slipping to the floorboards. “Robin! ROBIN!”

Part 8

tags: @estrellami-1 @kal-ology (thank you, thank you, thank you!) If anybody else would like to be tagged on this fic or any of my writing, please let me know :) Reblogs, comments and likes also very much appreciated :) Thank you for reading so far :)

(also part of my steve whump fic series on AO3)

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 1

Propaganda under the cut

Ginny Weasley

Okay hold on I know Harry Potter is bad its awful I KNOW BUT LISTEN- the way drarries have BUTCHERED and KILLED her character is something that truly needs to be studied because its one thing to make her and harry not date but oh my god they treat her like she is the DEVIL for EXISTING.

Tbh only remember the epilogue where they do a time skip and Harry and Ginny are married then they have a Bunch of kids boarding the train. In fics I see a lot of her either becoming psychotic trying to marry Harry and become lady potter or molly Weasley getting a contract to force a marriage. There’s a lot of m/m ships in the fandom but I think Harry and Draco are the most popular? Just wanted to throw someone different in here

The thing is, the deeper I got into the fics, the worse Ginny got? Like I read plenty of good fics where she was cool, but there was the same amount where for some reason she was controlling, or abusive, or dead. Like for Drarry? Come on! If you think Ginny sucks, I have some *shocking* news about Draco

Erina Pendleton

Erina is SO MUCH MORE than just a "Generic Love Interest" that was brought in the story to continue the bloodline after everything that happens (and it's made abundantly clear time and time and TIME AGAIN that she means everything to Jonathan, to a point that she was his exact reason to standing up against Dio for the first time) but without fail she's only ever allowed to be the supportive best friend. Or a wingman for Jonathan and whoever he's being shipped with. Or simply supposed to sit there and allow her husband to have a male lover (the amount of posts I've seen of ppl using the excuse that 'it was very common back in the Victorian Era for men to keep male lovers that their wives were aware of and quietly accepted so it isn't a stretch to say that Erina and Jonathan wouldn't be the same--especially given how progressive she's written". Or of course my favorite when they completely erase her from the narrative and pretends she doesn't exist Jonathan's got their son for some reason, but nope she ain't there! 

a lot of times ppl who ship her CANON HUSBAND jonathan joestar with speedwagon will put her on the back burner of HER OWN CANON RELATIONSHIP in favor of propping up jonawagon, to the point where 90% of the archive for jonawagon/jonawagon(eri) is either erina giving jonathan and speedwagon consent to be happy together while she acts like a #LoveIsLove wingman OR they'll have the audacity to write fics where erina comforts speedwagon at HER HUSBAND'S FUNERAL

Our hero’s hot wife who was the first (and arguably) only person to give him the emotional support he needed. She’s the only person who never expects him to fulfill some mythical role, she just loves him for who he is. She’s been his best friend and the love of his life since he was 12 years old. When it comes to hero/sidekick ship, she’s forced to be a wing woman for her own husband, either nobly letting him go or peacefully agreeing to an open relationship but only for him!!! She gets nothing out of it, she’s just a good Victorian wife who is “ahead of her time”. Usually, just so she can provide a womb so that the hero/sidekick can be dads and she can conveniently be offscreen. OR she’s written as a lesbian in order to completely and “justifiably” take her out of the equation but there’s a.) no other woman in her vicinity to even ship her with b.) there’s vaguely some faceless, nameless woman we’re meant to assume she’s pursuing, not even a real OC for her. 

[super-hero-confessions]

Honestly the people who lump Homelander into the whole babygirl thingy remind of those people who fawn over large and dangerous wild animals without proper levels of precaution because look how cute or beautiful I guess. And then get killed by those animals for not having reasonable precaution.

To be clear on a side tracked note I will say I would never blame the animal reacting to the dumbfucks that pull that shit. Humans are 100% at fault in those scenarios. Fuck around and find out.

Sure nature can be pretty. But it's also fucked with no limits and morality on a never happening scale. They get off on the idea of pacifying and depowering Homelander but realistically that's only something that would make him more miserable than he already is. Possibly more feral and a different kind of dangerous.

When you back someone or something into a corner when they're already backed into a corner they don't suddenly stop being a threat.

They explode.

His situation is similar to one of a wild animal that's been caged its whole life. That creates a boiling point waiting to overflow and it is bizarre to me that people ignore that or think further prodding and poking would somehow help him??

Hm. Like are y'all okay? Are you sure you're okay cause you don't seem okay to me.

Also please never ever get a cat because I can already see what horrid douchebaggery this kind of behavior or enjoyment would mean for that poor animal. Just because you can torture something and get on its nerves for a reaction doesn't mean you should. Isn't that kind of a point with Homelander's character?

That's part of the theme too. Billy Butcher isn't making him or anything better. They're both driving each other towards the brink. Homelander is a ticking time bomb and Billy is accelerating the count down because he's so self absorbed in his revenge schemes he's unwilling to pause and think about consequence for others.

Including Ryan and completely ignoring Vought in favor of going after Homelander.

Just seems like some are guilty of some similar lines of thought in a few different ways. Which is ironic given complaints about Vought being the real villain.

And I do get it to some degree. Some people have kinks. Some people feel the need to do this as a form of self comfort specifically and especially when it comes to nerfing the characters' powers. But some people just don't want to see the character or the image or even messages that is or are actually being portrayed because they feel they've made a better image in their head I suppose.

Have fun but please be cautious with that mindset as it can be extremely harmful when applied to real people or in real life.

The whole sanitizing or even nerfing of how dangerous Homelander actually is or what he's done or even where he's headed just to justify him as a babygirl? I really really think that could be done without.

Also I do not want to think of Trump as babygirl and I hate all of you so fucking much for that. I sincerely hope that image consumes your minds too.

Now imagine that unholy pompous cheeznip in babydoll lingerie including garter belt and sexy stockings that do not fit him properly and tell me it's fucking beautiful.

[alovelyburn]

i swear you and bthump are the best people to go to when to comes to berserk stuff

you guys just have such a great grasp on the story and really expose the ridiculousness of the western fanbase

The sad thing is, I can't even be proud of that because 90% of it is literally just reading the story (and interviews) without jumping through 15 hoops trying to explain to myself that everything characters (or Miura) said or did means the opposite of what they said or did.

Being in Western Berserk fandom is wild, it's like.....

Griffith: When I think about the dream and Guts, he is definitely more appealing. In fact he just made me forget my dream completely. Fans: He's saying that Guts is only a tool to him and he's only important because he's the best way to the dream.

Griffith: Do you think responding to royalty repeatedly trying to murder me by killing them first makes me a horrible person? Guts: LOL what, who even cares about murder, it's fine, you're fine, what a silly question honestly. Fans: Look at that fucking asshole Griffith what a sociopath. Poor Guts is such a kind-hearted gentleman.

Casca: WTF Griffith you let him do whatever he wants and don't even punish him when he does crazy things Fans: Griffith's so abusive to Guts.

Griffith: loses the most important person to him - eclipse doesn't trigger. falls into a deep depression - eclipse doesn't trigger. massively self-destructs - eclipse doesn't trigger. has a post-sex mental breakdown - eclipse doesn't trigger gets tortured for a year to the point where his body barely functions and his tongue is being used as a torturer's necklace - eclipse doesn't trigger. gets treated like a pile of baggage and a burden by the people he literally prostituted himself to support - eclipse doesn't trigger. overhears that the most important person to him is leaving AGAIN - freaks out, but eclipse doesn't trigger. hallucinates a nightmare of being a doll kept as a pseudo husband by the subordinate who always had a crush on him - eclipse doesn't trigger literally tries to kill himself - eclipse still doesn't trigger confronted by his completely hopeless feelings about a guy who keeps abandoning him - eclipse triggers, offered a sacrifice, just kinda sits there has his mind invaded by demon lords who use every doubt, insecurity, guilt pang and self-hating thought he ever had against him - still doesn't accept the sacrifice. reminded that if he stops he's wasted all the lives that he's been living to justify accidentally ending - bursts into tears, falls to his knees and repeatedly apologizes but still doesnt' accept the sacrifice has the specific words of the one person he loves most used against him by making it sound like that person would approve of him accepting the sacrifice - cracks but still hesitates told that the sacrifices will forgive him since that's what they're there for anyway - accepts the sacrifice Fans: He literally doesnt care, he would have said yes ANY TIME, like if the Godhand waltzed up to him when he was literally sitting on the throne, he would've been like, FUCK YEAH GIMME THE POWER, KILL EVERYONE! because only cares about himself and power.

The Actual Worldbuilding: Sacrifices only work if you love the sacrifice so much that losing them is like losing a piece of yourself. Fans: Obviously you don't need to care about people to sacrifice them because Griffith sacrificed the Hawks, who he didn't care about.

M E A N W H I L E

Guts: Ignores the eclipse as it butchers his friends in order to repeatedly try to save Griffith. Then jumps down and wanders around trying to save literally anyone. Fans (AND THE DARK HORSE SYNOPSES): Guts' primary concern during the Eclipse was saving Casca, he made a beeline for her like, tunnel vision whoa.

S O M E T I M E L A T E R

Guts' subconscious: Why don't you just abandon her? Better yet, rape and murder her so you can be more like Griffith and be closer to him and twirl yourself around him like a vine. Guts: [LITERALLY SEXUALLY ASSAULTS HER WHILE FANTASIZING ABOUT MURDERING HER SO HE CAN BE CLOSER TO GRIFFITH] Fans: Guts loves Casca more than anything in the world, shes all he cares about.

Guts: When I see him I'll ....... Puck: Man, when Guts thinks about this Hawk guy, he gets so mad, but also his feelings are super complicated. Guts: When I saw Griffith there, I totally lost my desire to kill him. Also Guts: What do you mean you don't feel anything, come on feel something [poke poke poke] Hey wait where are you going?! Guts: This sucks just as much as when I left the Hawks, except this time I'm the one getting dumped. :/ Also Guts: Anyway I should drop Casca on Elfhelm and then find Griffith and......................... Berserk Guidebook: Guts' feelings about Griffith include bitter hatred and an unending stream of other complicated feelings. Also Guts: Anyway so, when I see him I'll ....... Fans: Guts just hates Griffith so much and nothing else. It's just hate. He wants Griffith dead so much like its even more extreme than the normal wanting someone dead. SO much deathlust, and NOTHING ELSE.

Guts: /swings at Griffith and misses Casca: /gets kidnapped Guts: I couldn't hit him even a little, and my sword let me down, I have nothing to believe in or strive for anymore. Fans: Look at him he's so broken up about Casca.

I literally feel like I'm in fucking bizarro land when I read your average western berserk fan's commentary it is WILD.

[zalrb]

So I know you don’t think the cast of The Boys gel and I’m inclined to agree. What do you think of the actual acting and characters? Are Homelander and Butcher compelling characters, or are they poorly written?

I’ve been struggling with the Homelander question myself because I think he’s a very fun character. I love seeing him become more and more unraveled, but I’m not sure what to make of him because the show itself has that question of responsibility: how much is Homelander responsible for considering his upbringing and how he’s been manipulated by Vought his entire life, but also how can he not be held responsible for his crimes when he’s literally the most powerful man on Earth? Like you said, it’s very muddled and I’m not sure what to make of it.

Butcher is a bit easier for me because I think he made a good anti-hero at first, but again with the muddling because he hates supes for what they did to him, but now he’s willing to become one? I get that the point of Butcher is that he has no principles and the ends justify the means for him, but I’d like to see more consistency than “I want Homelander dead” from him.

It's always difficult for me to explain my feelings about The Boys because I find that its balance is off, sometimes the satire is so, painfully "yes, ok we get it" overt and sometimes it hits and sometimes I'm like, so what are you saying with this? and sometimes I'm like ... so you're missing your own supposed point

And Homelander as a character is all three things, which is why I end up making posts like

because it all gets muddled and the fan reactions get unhinged and I think it's because the writers want to have their cake and eat it too.

Like, outside of the show, Kripke is always like, how are people not understanding the character?

He says that Homelander was always a stand-in for Trump but it gets more obvious in season 3

The evil-Superman-style character Homelander is becoming more and more of a direct Trump analogue this season. What was your thinking there? He’s always been a Trump analogue for me. I’ll admit to being a little more bald this season than I have in past seasons. But the world is getting more coarse and less elegant. The urgency of our team’s writing reflects that. We’re angrier and more scared as the years go on, so that is just being reflected in our writing. But part of it is where Homelander’s story naturally goes. He has this really combustible mix of complete weakness and insecurity, and just horrible power and ambition, and it’s just such a deadly combo. Of course he would feel victimized that people are angry that he dated a Nazi. All he ever wants is to be the most powerful person he can be, even though he’s completely inadequate in his abilities to handle it. So it’s white-male victimization and unchecked ambition. And those issues just happened to reflect the guy who, it’s just still surreal to say it, was fucking president of the United States. And it’s a bigger issue than just Trump. The more awful public figures act, the more fans they seem to be getting. That’s a phenomenon that we wanted to explore, that Homelander is realizing that he can actually show them who he really is and they’ll love him for it. 

and that's there. Like, Homelander is written obviously as a villain, Homelander is written obviously as a narcissist who will do anything to protect his image, it's there from Day One but I think the writing is infatuated with the character. Like, even more so than with Butcher, who Kripke calls the hero of the show. I think the writing is fascinated by Homelander's psychology

I love it. There’s a smaller moment with Homelander where he’s having this conversation with himself in the mirror. And it gives new insight into his psyche. What do you hope viewers take away from that scene?

You know, our take on Homelander is even though he’s a sociopath, he’s also a human being who has reactions and feelings. To me, the biggest sin that Homelander commits is that he hates that he has feelings and he hates that he’s a human being. You know, if he embraced that part of him more, he might be a happier person who isn’t going to destroy the planet. I think in the original version of it, the figure in the mirror was just this kind of cruel browbeating character telling Homelander what a loser he was.

And, Antony [Starr] called me and said, “What if it’s his childhood friend? And what if they have this connection because he was alone for so long that he ended up creating this relationship with an image of himself? And that’s what got him through these situations?” And I was like, that’s awesome. Because one, it’s sad, but it’s also really scary. [This is] a guy with multiple personality disorder. And that part of him is saying, “Cut out the part of you that’s human.” I don’t want people to sympathize with Homelander but I do want them to understand him a little more. I look at that scene, and I get a little scared by it, too.

and I'm like ... I don't know, it seems like the writing wants me to sympathize with him and that's why you and I are having this conversation because the execution of this isn't striking the right balance so when the right-wing fans freaked out in season 3 and there was that reddit shitstorm, it's like yeah, Homelander (and Blue Hawk) is clearly a villain, literally just look at what he does. Yeah, you were being wilfully obtuse if you didn't see that the show was always a political satire. But I think they picked up on the glee and fascination the writing has with Homelander and that's why they expected a redemption arc.

And when it comes to the basic concept of a superhero who is actually sociopathic and terrorizes the people he publicly makes a show out of saving, I can understand being fascinated by that because it's an interesting concept and that aspect of it. This,

We are a superhero show, but we deconstruct and break down and shine a light on the complete fucking absurdities of a superhero show and poke a lot of fun at what it is to be a superhero, and how stupid that world is, and how horrible they’d be as people.

they do well and clearly but when you make that concept inherently political and tie that up in an exploration of fascism and nationalism and capitalism and racism and you're not ... doing anything with it, then what's the point of his character. He's a Trump stand-in, OK ... and ... what? Like ... what?

Like with Succession, they're all toxic, broken, horrible, sinfully wealthy white people and the show is upfront in sympathizing with them, in doing what it can to find their humanity, in exploring abusive parental dynamics but it's also making clear commentary and I can see the commentary and I can trace the commentary and the fandom can argue about what exactly they're saying but they're clearly saying something.

Kripke says they're making commentary but it feels like a half-finished thought at best. You're noticing how the more politicians behave badly in public, the more their base loves them so you're showing that with Homelander and ... what? He talks about exploring the cycles of toxic masculinity because Soldier Boy is his father and the two of them have done the same things in their romantic relationships

"The fact that they are both genuinely stunned that the women in their lives hate them tells you everything you need to know about how blinded they are by their own egos," said the producer. "So no, love does not redeem you when you're a horrible person who is completely blind to other people's emotions."

but Homelander didn't even know he had a father until this season, for his entire life he just thought he was made in a tube, so the generational cycles angle isn't really working for me, and again what are you saying with this, what is the point?

Like, when they're poking fun at the left with how out-of-touch they can be and how they commodify movements and identities, the intent is clear, I don't get that with Homelander.

And I think an issue for me with this as well is that a very vocal portion of the fandom is doing the very thing with the characters that the writers are apparently satirizing or criticizing so, like, Stormfront for instance, there is clear irony in a lot of her scenes and this is when they're making overt commentary. Like, she is a literal nazi but she made a quip about how the female superheroes should have uniforms with pockets so she's an internet sensation, I get that, and that played out with the fandom and the character, which is why I made a post like

and that happens continuously with Homelander. And maybe an argument could be made that that isn't the writers' fault considering how in season 3 specifically, Homelander fans realized that they're the punchline which means that they're doing something right but I think because they want to keep writing Homelander, keep wanting to see what he'll do next, keep coming up with disturbing, weird shit for him to do, and there's an infatuation with that, they're not executing what they say they're executing as well as they could and that's a failing to me.

With Butcher, his entire personality seems to be summed up with

there is no greater good, there is no altruism, there is no honour, there is no loyalty, there's just

and that's all you really need to know.

In terms of the acting, I think Anthony Starr does a good job in showing how unhinged Homelander is. Karl Urban is a bit cartoonish for me.

[earthgrudgefear]

hidan!!! for the ask game

YES right to it

obviously this is going to be a long post

you've been warned !

favorite thing about them: oh man. i think he's a really unique character. he's only like 2% justified in his anger and he makes it everyone else's problem. he's never depicted as anything BUT evil. the shinobi world is insane right? toddlers are raised as soldiers the second they can hold a knife. and so was he, no different from the rest of them. and the series Doesn't like to push that blame onto people, really early on you hear about all the awful things zabuza did and at the end of their battle he still dies as a respectable shinobi. BUT from start to end with hidan he is ONLY bad. he's doing this for FUN he's not doing it for a mission, he's not doing it because he needs to do it to survive like it was NEVER in question that this guy is JUST EVIL. but you CAN find these human sides to him. he has a Real bond with kakuzu, like they Actually are concerned for each other. in Akatsuki Hiden he meets a kid and he forms a bond with That Kid to the point of giving him funeral rites (burial rites?) when he dies. not as a sacrifice but as someone he cared about. when his village turned on him and he felt REAL betrayal. if he didn't care about them to some extent, he wouldn't still be mad about it. it's just FASCINATING.

least favorite thing about them: i don't even think there's anything i don't like about him. he's so fucking annoying and if i had to deal with him i'd try to kill him too BUT because i don't have to deal with him he's my best friend i like him SO much

favorite line: to be so transparent i like when he's picking on kakuzu for keeping the headband for him.

AND if i can use the book - i like this, it's less about the line itself but more about the repetition of it. like this is how they start every fight and i just think that's delightful

brOTP: y'all already know it's kisame. my defense for this has absolutely no basis in their interactions because honestly? kisame doesn't care for him too much. HOWEVER kisame is the easiest akatsuki member to get along with and hidan is basically impossible to get along with. i think it's a good match.

OTP: kakuhida, motherfuckers. they're everything to me. they were on screen for all of three seconds and i already knew that was it. i haven't been normal about them since. and they're canon as far as i'm concerned. stated or not they were Something.

nOTP: k*nan (sorry for censoring you name queen i don't want it to be searchable) i have such a Visceral reaction to them together i Cannot stand it. their characterization is so BUTCHERED for that ship that they become Unrecognizable. and i don't fucking get it like ??? yes they're both hot PICK ANYONE ELSE. also shipping him with any of the kids. like. that's not cute. he's young but he's not that young also holy shit they don't deserve that anyway

random headcanon: i probably mentioned this somewhere before and it's so easy but i think his favorite color's pink. like red sure because i mean look at him but also. Pink. i like pink for him.

unpopular opinion: i've touched on this before i don't think jashinism is real. i think he made it up and i think maybe he's convinced himself it's real. but i don't think there is a single other person who's ever heard of or tried to join the religion before. there's the kid i mentioned from the book but he learned straight from hidan, and then goddamned ryuki from boruto who i swear to God the writers wanted him to literally be hidan but they weren't allowed. neither of which really compel me to believe it. it just doesn't make tons of sense

song i associate with them: ouuh choke on one another death spells. that's been a big one recently

favorite picture of them:

favorite's a big word but i had this one saved to my phone which is probably good enough

OKAY 10000 points if you made it to the end you win idk what you win but you win

[icharchivist]

Tbh that's my issue with a lot of modern video games

I don't need photorealistic graphics. I want things to look good and clear and interesting

Trying to make your humans look like real humans only leads to the uncanny valley and it usually ends up dating your game because by the time the next generation comes out, your graphics are outdated

Also, I play video games to get away from people

It's completely fine to stylize things. It looks better, even in twenty years, it avoids the uncanny valley, it can still be expressive! And it cuts down on rendering and ideally on development costs. Like, I play the new Baldur's Gate and my computer is not high-end, but the game runs fine. Except for the dialogue scenes, where sometimes the expressions are weird and it kind of lingers uncomfortably for a few seconds before going to the next dialogue. Again, probably a problem with my computer, but it's a bit weird every time

Meanwhile I'm looking forward to Relink, which is a very stylized Anime game and I'm sure it's still gonna look good in 20 years

Or like, Super Mario. The new Zeldas. Stuff like that

There's also the argument that back then, games had to sell you on their narrative and story and gameplay instead of just graphics. I personally don't have an opinion on this, there's plenty of ugly games that also suck as well as pretty games with good stories. But I'm also not one of those people who throw a fit about a game not running at 60 FPS

But yeah, Final Fantasy games could totally embrace their Anime roots, I'm sure they'd be better for it

Fortunately, animation in movies at least is moving towards more stylized and I think that could be cool

Video games are art as well, after all and I'm happy for each one that isn't trying and then subsequently struggling with this self-imposed realism where it's not actually needed

You don't have to publish this ask btw, this just popped into my head just now and I have a lot of thoughts about animation

TOTALLY AGREE, 100%.

Like i think trying to perfect some graphic is fine and all but it's been quite a few years now that the progress is genuinely not worth it. Like the constant rush for realism often end up bringing duller artistic choices (which is even more noticeable with the remake trend in general because you see how older games went around those "graphic limitations") and it's just... not worth it? not with how big and huge it makes a game in the end?

like i know BG3 is that big because it's a huge game and stuff, but the fact i need over 150GB of stockage to install it gives me hives. If a part of it is due to the overthe top animations and high res's designs... i'd rather them toning it down instead.

Final Fantasy definitely fall into this category as well. Like for crying out loud, they justified making the remake a multiparter because the assets for Midgar alone were too big to just make the prologue of the game (which it IS, the current remake that came out in 2020 only covers the PROLOGUE of the main game) and it ended up being the reason they went completely off script and made a whole new narrative instead. All because they wanted the whole city to be this HD? Like Crisis Core came out in 2007, it's not perfect graphic wise, but it plays well within its limitation. And most of it happens in Midgar!!! they just knew to limitate as much of the Midgar's sets as they could!! Seeing how its remake just basically butcher most of the artistic creativity just by replacing the models with HD models is genuinely so boring to me. What's the point!! what's the point!!

maybe it's nostalgia and all but i'm at a point where i feel like most graphisms from up to the mid 2010s, as far as realism go, have pretty much filled this artistic approach, and anything else is just more flashy just to prove they can do it.

like i keep seeing those Last of Us' remaster's comparaison and i feel so ill like, the first game already holds up fine!! it didn't need all those remasters what the fuck are you people on about!! how is it improving the game the slightest!! i mean i know it's all about money, but jesus christ it's SO not worth it???? (for the record i don't give a shit about TLOU, i just saw the screenshots and it makes me feel ill).

i've also seen comparaisons of some Metal Gear Solid's remakes comparaisons where in order to chase the realism of the effects of the jungle and everything, they just completely removed the stylized lightning and atmosphere because REALISM, amnt i right? how is that better?? i don't need 30GB+ of game on my computer just to nod like "ah yes this one cutscene was worth me uninstalling a couple of my old games for it. you got me."

at this point i'd rather they focus on the story! on the characters! allocate this time somewhere else!

and it comes with a major disregard for stylized games in general. Games that don't want to pursue realism and are doing just fine like this.

idk i'm also just rambling but it makes me so sad. I'm not even against HD graphisms, but i definitely think we reached a cap years ago already and most of the attempt at progress we've had since have been about removing the stylization to push the realism, and it's genuinely not the interesting way to push the medium forward.

and like i'm definitely at the age where i'm probably clouded with nostalgia and i'm just "old man yelling at clouds" (ahah get it because Cloud stri-) and all but this is genuinely something that gets me annoyed.

and with ff7 in particular i'm just so upset because the pursue of realism led to "the game is too big now because of the assets so we need to cut it into pieces" to "but the pieces we have don't have enough plots to explore all the assets we have so now we're doing an original story!" and every decisions the "remake" has taken outside of the remake portions have been making me sick in my stomach. And while greed is of course the main cause of it all, it just ends up feeling so disingenuous and now i'm at a point a remake i awaited for a long time just so the saga could have a coherent imagery together (because the OG's graphisms do in fact clash a lot with the rest of the graphisms of the others game of the saga) just now is something i want nothing to do with. (except to take screenshots when the characters look pretty. 3D model simulator only.)

so yeah. felt. so much so. it fucking kills meeee like whyyy

BUT ALSO YEAH it's why games like Relink is definitely up my alley on that. Finally a game that is trying to actually do some style and isn't relying on realism to sell you something. Fucking lord. At last. We just needed Granblue to save us istg.

[kaownah]

finally finished kinnporshe, and tbh im sad bc i wanted so badly to absolutely love it but i have so many mixed feelings

just some thoughts:

bad stuff first

1. i really did like the show up until around ep 6-7, then things just slowly (then very quickly) started falling apart tbh

2. lots of pacing issues, some plot holes, predictability

3. was i supposed to care about kim/chay at all? like? chay’s obsession with kim was so goofy and their chemistry was nonexistent like what a horrendously pointless plotline tbh they should’ve just cut the couple all together it literally added nothing (give jeff something with substance please i beg)

4. speaking of chay... barcode’s acting.... um. chile anyways so

5. i loved kinnporsche’s dynamic but then after they got together they totally fell flat and were like every other mediocre 2d couple i’ve seen in less hyped bl’s like... where did that fun dynamic go

6. why was everyone so stupid for most of the second half? where was the common sense? tankhun of all people was really the one with the most common sense tbh he said “why are you all suddenly becoming stupid” and he meant that

7. there so much hype for vegaspete, i was SO excited for them going into this and? all we were given was torture, a sort of stockholm syndrome, then pete left. i have some qualms about bible’s acting too (it took him a while to find his footing but he wasn’t bad later on, i’d say the tail end of pete’s captivity onward he got substantially better). with the relationship, not enough happened to justify pete’s feelings for vegas. i can kind of see why vegas feels how he does for pete, although it feels very shallow and like he is far too dependent on pete, considering literally the only reason he didn’t shoot himself was bc pete came back. as for pete... i just don’t buy the whole starting to love vegas while being held captive/tortured, just bc he felt bad for him regarding his dad? idk

8. by the end watching it felt like a chore... idk i just wish the energy and spirit and quality of the first maybe 5-ish episodes stuck around bc everything after that was just. boring. flat. predictable. kinda cringe-y at a lot of points

9. character development was really there at first and then it’s like it was too much work for them bc they just seemed to drop it at a certain point and personalities just started completely being drained out of everyone

10. this is a small random thing but it kept bothering me... people would have their guns out and trained on someone, and then gave that person enough time to slowly, VERY visibly get their guns out so there could be a showdown? like what’s the point of having your gun trained on someone if you’re gonna allow them to point one back??? shit made no sense lmao

11. unrealistic fights... tbh this isn’t just kinnporsche, it’s a big theme in action genre in general, but like.. wym everyone has guns and aren’t shy in shooting until the mains get close, then suddenly they’re given enough time to take out massive groups one by one bc the enemies just... let them. plenty of instances of characters taking down a baddie and then just standing there before the next guy comes up, which would’ve been ample time to get shot, but the baddies are just like nah let’s fist fight :) i understand plot armor but at least make it make sense

honorable mention: i know subtitles aren’t production’s fault so i’m not going to fault them for this but. holy shit. who was subtitling this, they were absolutely godawful ie. changing curses into ‘fudge’, ‘frick’, etc (are we six? why can we see murder and violence but curse words are where lines are drawn), and grammar being butchered

okay i know i listed all these negative points, i will say that the show wasn’t a COMPLETE flop. some positives...

1. apo was great. i loved the little mannerisms he gave porsche, the physicality of him, just overall i really enjoyed his acting

2. build was also consistently good. for most of the series, he wasn’t given as much to do, but he really was a standout particularly at the end of the series (that tub scene was a shining light in a show that otherwise had dulled by this point) and pete’s journey was actually interesting but imo we just weren’t given enough time with it

3. i know vegaspete was a negative but i will say that there could be some positives there. they could have a very interesting dynamic if were given enough time with them and really got to the root of their motives with each other. i MIGHT be interested in having a story about them, but i’d be really wary about the story going in the same direction as kinnporsche (initially interesting before turning into something kinda boring)

4. the theme song. THE THEME SONG. A BOP. it’s such an earworm omg it’ll be stuck in my head for months

finally.. the final ep. this one really can’t go into the negatives or positives. on one hand, this episode finally marked a massive uptick in quality after so many boring eps. not only was it unpredictable as hell, but we finally got our characters finding their personalities again, common sense made a return, and we ACTUALLY got some mafia activity. i signed up for a show with gang/mob plotline, and it felt like we had lost virtually all of that for the second half of the series. why couldn’t we have had quality like this in pervious eps? i’m not saying there had to be a shootout in every episode, but something with psychological meat. with that being said, i think they kind of overdid the plot twists in the finale. it was one after another after another of shit going down and pasts being revealed and characters kind of going batshit, that it really started to get ridiculous by the time porsche’s mom and korn were revealed to still be alive. korn’s reasoning for everything that happened was so silly that it really made me pause the ep entirely just to be like... are you fr? really? goofy stuff. also, throwing in the casual mention of sexual violence against one of the show’s only women as a reason for angst for the male characters was so beyond lame and unnecessary. idk how i felt about the whole porsche being head of the minor family, it was fine ig. overall, the final ep really gave me whiplash

idk i’m just so sad bc at this point 99% of the super super hyped thai shows i go into at this point i wind up being disappointed in?? and i want so badly to bc the ones that hit REALLY hit. but they’re just so rare. idk like japan has completely taken over in terms of quality imo, i really don’t trust thai bls anymore atp which is sad bc even the ones that are finally taking a step away from the insanely overused tropes wind up boring or poorly written in the end 

anyway just my opinion let me wallow!!

[holocephal1]

I posted 1,917 times in 2022

That's 1,317 more posts than 2021!

61 posts created (3%)

1,856 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@argentavis

@fandoms-of-a-random-existence

@tgirlgerard

@goths-eat-electricity

@milfcarmilla

I tagged 1,634 of my posts in 2022

Only 15% of my posts had no tags

#<3... - 223 posts

#ghosts - 216 posts

#tlt - 61 posts

#mcr - 53 posts

#&lt;3 - 42 posts

#yeah - 37 posts

#sandman - 35 posts

#im so. tlt - 34 posts

#ocean - 32 posts

#starwar - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#which is made of copper and rust. you are from a war-ridden planet and the cause of your first death was a starship crash. you sing and pla

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

overthinking kitty's "she hit me!" "she can't!" "well, she wanted to!" interaction about lucy again.

i think its a really good reflection of her experiences and how she's learned to handle things tbh, because its something she says to try and make the others listen to how she's feeling. and i figure a lot of her life was not being listened to about her feelings or experiences, so she resorts to last-ditch exaggerations to try and get her point heard.

102 notes - Posted November 17, 2022

#4

im obsessed with just how much of the captain is about theatrics. because when it comes down to it, he's not... put together. like at all. the flashback we see is meant to be his Element, (and you can put this down to gay panic, or the Everything Else if you like), but he sucks at it, a bit. more than a bit, a lot. he's completely flustered, and doing completely arbitrary things, and its very clear that Havers is the competent one in that situation, especially because he gives functional orders and then is like 'go on listen to your CO.' and its something that comes through with Cap all the time. as much as he's continually reasserting his rank, he's so clearly not in charge. at all. and he's continually trying to prove the Cool and Powerful Leadership part of his identity to the other ghosts- eg. him interrupting in The Thomas Thorne Affair to basically just be like 'look how cool and functional id be if this were me'. and in insisting that he'd wear his uniform even if given the chance to do literally anything else. being The Captain is so integral to the false existence he puts up, and i'd guess he probably used it in life to hide other aspects of his reality from both himself and others, to prevent any sort of questioning. how dare they suspect their CO, and how could he possibly be 'that kind of person' when he's a well respected, high ranking officer?

157 notes - Posted September 21, 2022

#3

thinking about the fact julian died with a wedding ring on and pat didnt..

pls ignore the photo quality in favour of the amout of sad this makes me

195 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

#2

totally unfounded ghosts theory

SO . i was thinking about this image:

a little too hard. and about people saying the thing in the captain's hand might be a tissue. and the idea of cap dying at his medal ceremony has been bouncing around my brain for a while, but i THOUGHT, what if the captain died at a funeral/memorial service? it would explain why he's in uniform, and at button house (given the people stationed there) despite the war likely being over and all by the time of his death. i cannot justify this at all, because my brain isnt working enough to research it without just getting current war memorial events, but! its an idea.

222 notes - Posted September 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i feel like we as a fandom don't talk about pat referring to himself as 'the big bad butcher man' enough

270 notes - Posted November 5, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[valenteal]

Alright I see what you’re saying about the headcanons (which are not head canons so much a inferences from the information we have) BUT I have to clarify that multiple psychologists have explained that yes Anakin Skywalker has bpd. He has enough prominently visible symptoms to be clinically diagnosed if he were a real person. This is a fact.

Yes, some Jedi get glimpses of the future, or the past, but that is in no way the same thing as fully experiencing time in a non linear fashion.

I didn’t say that Jedi had ready access to that 4th dimensional view of reality, I said that the Force gives them a glimpse of what it could be like. we literally used the same word to describe it. I’m getting this from Yoda’s lines about how Jedi are luminous beings. But I'm also not just using the movies. (I'll get into my view on Clone wars in canon shortly.) It can be inferred also from everything we know about the Cosmic Force. Basically the Cosmic Force is that fourth time dimensional view of the universe while the Living Force is the fourth SPACE dimensional view of the universe. Sorry I’ve been being a physics nerd for the past few days all this is fresh in my head right now. Point is, the Jedi truly don’t see time as a linear thing even if they are for the most part confined to the present. They see something having existed in the past as never disappearing because the past is fixed and nothing can change that. The past still exists and thus everything that existed in the past will always exist and that is how they justify not feeling grief over loss.

And I want to be clear on something: I do consider the majority of Clone Wars to be canon and I do take quite a bit from Legends as well so not everything I say comes from the movies. But as a writer I do not see Clone Wars Anakin’s characterization as faithful due to stupid things like pandering to the audience who didn’t want to confront things like the complexity an nuance of mental health and toxic environments and relationships. Everything else, the characterization of others like Obi-Wan, Yoda, and Windu? The characters who didn’t get a ton of hate after the prequels were released? That’s all fine. It’s just Padmé and Anakin who suffered from deliberately butchering their character.

So all the Mortis arc, Yoda’s season 6 adventure to become one with the cosmic force and all the implications that go with it? Canon. The Jedi Council’s treatment of Anakin? Canon.

Exactly one Jedi made a big deal about Anakin being the Chosen One: Qui-Gon. That's it. The Jedi don't treat Anakin any different than any other member of their order.

This is patently false. His admission into the order was debated by the full council in front of him. That is extremely irregular. and even once he was admitted into the order he was at the level of Palawan at a young age and skipping the initiate phase. He grew up knowing that most of the council didn't want him there. Mace in particular made it pretty damn clear he didn't like Anakin.

We also know that Anakin was powerful beyond anything the Jedi had ever seen. it can be inferred that they would react more strongly to his emotional volatility than they do with other Jedi who aren't already seen as dangerous.

...I'm not sure what you expect the Jedi to do about that? Qui-Gon died, and Padme was a Queen who had to go back to her own planet.

Well they certainly could have handled it better than they did! Maybe it wasn't their fault but it was their responsibility to help him learn to properly cope. And it wasn't just that Padmé had to return to Naboo, Anakin literally wasn't allowed to be in communication with her, which I'm pretty sure was explicitly stated in Queen's Shadow.

That was a choice that Anakin made. Sidious didn't force his hand. Anakin made the decision that the chance of saving Padme - from a fate he didn't know for sure she'd experience! - was worth betraying the Jedi, worth murdering younglings, worth overthrowing the Republic and turning it into an Empire.

Now this. This is complicated. Because on a certain level you are correct. But he also wasn't in his right mind. He'd been fighting a war for months, hadn't slept in days, was being heavily manipulated, his entire support system was absent, and he was splitting all at the same time. and if you pay attention you'll notice that he resisted very very well. it was not easy for Palpatine to manipulate him into that situation. to even get Anakin to the point where he was mentally unstable enough to turn to the dark side took over TEN YEARS of manipulation. And after that it was actually the Jedi who played the ground work for him to continue making those choices after he became Vader. because the Jedi teach that once you fall theirs no going back, which is provably false but Anakin didn't know that. you may also notice that it didn't actually take much for Vader to return to the light side. Simply having one person believe in him was enough.

Addressing the bit about him not knowing for sure Padmé would die, I have to point out that even from Phantom Menace Anakin shows extreme reliability when predicting the near future. and he touted the dreams about his mother and as a result she died. If he'd responded to this vision just a few days, heck even hours, earlier Shmi could have survived.

That's why I call Anakin selfish and possessive. Because ultimately, he didn't care about Padme's feelings or opinions.

And this is where we come back to the BPD, which again is NOT a head canon but the opinion of multiple psychologists and people with BPD.

Anakin greatly values Padmé's feelings and opinions most of the time. to an unhealthy degree. to the point where his self-image is reliant on her opinion of him.

He was in the midst of a splitting episode. Here's a definition:

Splitting is a symptom of BPD. It occurs when a person sees everything as black or white, good or bad, or best or worst. Splitting is a defense mechanism people living with BPD use to deal with emotions (such as the fear of abandonment) that they cannot handle.

That's what was going on. He was unable to reconcile Padmé being against the side he'd chosen and thus could only see it as a betrayal. I also have to point out that he didn't actually choke her that hard or for that long. Her struggles weren't nearly as frantic as the could've been and later the medical droid made it clear that the was nothing physically wrong with her. There didn't even seem to be any bruising. Padmé shouldn't have died. And Anakin shouldn't have survived. And the Force can be used to drain life energy and transfer it to another person. Palpatine wanted Anakin alive and isolated, so killing Padmé to keep him alive would have been the perfect strategy. Anyway that's getting into theory territory so I digress. The Point is Anakin didn't choose to disregard Padmé or her beliefs, I don't even know if he was cognizant at all of Sidious's plans or what they meant. All he could really see was a black and white view of his side vs. the Jedi.

As for the unconditional love you say he needed? Padme did love him unconditionally.

Which is exactly why he was so desperate to protect her. Even beyond the fact that he loved her she was literally the only person who gave him what he needed. She was his entire support system. If the Jedi had supported him the way he needed things might have turned out differently. If he'd felt safe actually asking for help and being open about the details of the situation the Jedi might actually have been able to do something about it. But when he did go and ask for help he was chastised for caring and wanting to save someone from a possibly preventable death. Which is so messed up. Yoda didn't even press for details about the nature of the death to determine the risk of doing something. just claimed that sometimes the harder you fight the future the more likely it becomes or something. I don't see how Padmé potentially seeing a Jedi healer could have made things worse.

In conclusion the Jedi Order and its Council made a Buch of huge screw up when it came to raising Anakin and it ended up killing them and literally driving him insane. His mental health was their responsibility and they didn't just drop the ball, they threw it.

"no attachments" in SW literally just means "don't be selfish and possessive". that's it. that's all there is. doesn't mean jedi can't have friends and loved ones. they can. just. don't be possessive and selfish about it. don't murder thousands of people in an effort to save one.

[lycankeyy]

ive never played a pokemon game past gen 6 😭 can you tell me what makes usum so much worse than their originals

I CAN CERTAINLY TRY it's worth noting that most people who dislike USUM are people who's favorite part of the games are the characters. USUM actually tends to be more popular than SuMo gameplay-wise because of some things it adds and because it's very good for shiny hunting. The only gameplay irk it seems to give people is the random difficulty spikes - instead of just making it, like... actually harder that SuMo in general, they opted to just make a few story battles extremely difficult and left it at that. It's still a very easy game that just has a handful of Nuzlocke killers thrown in and it feels very stilted LMAO

The main problem with USUM is what it did to the story. SuMo has great characters. Some of the best in the franchise. Of particular interest is Lillie and Lusamine - Lusamine is an explicitly abusive parent to her children, and the ending is Lillie standing up to her abuser, where she finally gets through to her. It tackles this in both a nuanced way and one thats easy to understand for kids. Many people felt seen by the story. Lusamine's actions were never justified in the story because it would ruin the point.

In USUM they gave Lusamine's actions justification and it ruined the point LMAO in USUM everything that Lusamine did that drove her children away from her was to protect them from something that was actually about to happen, and as such the story kind of wants you to forget that she ever abused them in the first place because it's "understandable". There's no climactic scene where Lillie confronts her mother and makes her realize she was wrong, because in this timeline she wasn't wrong. Lusamine just kind of apologizes after the fact and everyone forgives her and that's it. Made even weirder by how they chose to change dialogue - she still says lines like "I have no children" to Lillie, before referring to Lillie and Gladion as her children not long after. I guess a good way to put it is that SuMo she's the villain, in USUM she's the fake-out villain who's actually not that bad.

It's like. Awful. They butchered it. And to add the cherry on top its impossible to play this game without realizing how unnecessary this all is. It literally could've just been DLC. They did not need to release the same game twice with a different, slightly worse coat of paint. Full respect to people who prefer USUM but I could never understand LMAO