#they told me the wrong date that i could withdraw by so im having to partially pay for the course | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

illneverrecover · 5 years ago

Text

call you mine (M) | changkyun

➛pairing: Im Changkyun (I.M.) x reader ➛genre: friends with benefits!AU, non Idol!AU, angst, smut, fluff. ➛word count: 2,741 ➛rating: M ➛warnings: idk this is truly some sweet soft shit, mentions of alcohol, friends with benefits, standing sex, slight rough sex, biting/marking because clearly I have a kink, unprotected sex, creampie, mentions of Mingi!!, lots of kissing, soft clown Chaingang truly. ➛summary: Changkyun knew he ruined your friends with benefits arrangement when he let his feelings be known, and now you’ve left him on read for weeks. So he does the only thing he can to stay sane - he religiously watches your Instagram stories. ➛notes: Another first for me - my first Monsta X fic! I’ve played around with writing Changkyun for a while now, mostly because I live to torture @taetaesbaebaepsae (which she deserves from all the PAINFUL and RUDE Baekhyun shit she’s written for me). However, she decided to actively commission her own demise, because she stays not listening to Namjoon and refuses to love herself. I’m glad I finally got a chance to take a stab at writing her ult, and I hope I did him justice! Enjoy your tomfoolery, Kristin! 💖 ➛song: Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers & Bebe Rexha | Horizon - I.M. & Elhae

It’s pathetic, he knows.

The way he can’t stop watching, the way he seeks your face out in an app full of millions of others. The way he can’t get you out of his bed, his head, his thoughts.

He fucked up, scared you off, and now he’s left with the aftermath of his own stupidity. Watching you through a screen to fight the withdrawals off, to keep his heart beating.

Changkyun knows you would laugh at him if you saw what he was doing.

Watching your Instagram stories is the only reason he’s heard you laugh in over two weeks, the only way he’s been able to see your eyes light up, your lips curve into a salacious grin. Things he fucking missed, thought he would have plenty of time to indulge in - until he couldn’t keep his mouth shut and ruined it.

He had taken you back to his place after a few shots of whisky at the dingy local bar, hands and mouth unable to leave your skin - just like the hundreds of times before. It had been four months since you had started this friends with benefits relationship, and despite having freedom to see whomever he wanted, Changkyun found himself only starving for you. So hungry that he couldn’t stand another moment in that place, watching you share your smile with anyone other than him. So he had tugged you close, nipped at your ear, told you that you were so damn beautiful that he couldn’t stand there another minute without you coming undone around him.

You had smirked, slid your hand down the front of his pants, grabbing his cock like you owned it, purring out the words “prove it” before following him outside, just like the hundreds of times before.

Pressed up against his wall, his pelvis flush with yours, Changkyun whispered filth in your ears as he ground up against you, swallowing your moans in greedy kisses. Desperate fingers had pulled at your top, freeing your breasts for him to worship as he worked your skirt up around your waist, thrusting his clothed length against your core until you were whining.

Changkyun always promised to take his time with you, to work you over until you were drunk on his touch and pleading for more - but you never let him, always knowing the right thing to say to get his gaze to go dark and lust to turn frantic, to unzip his jeans and press inside your dripping cunt right there in the hallway.

Just like the hundreds of times before.

You had come around him, digging your nails in his back so hard it left marks, made him growl your name against your collarbone as his thrusts picked up speed to fuck you through the high. You urge him on in the way only you can manage, begging for his release, whispering how much you want his come deep in your cunt. Biting down against the skin, he had spilled inside you with a final groan, hips twitching as he pumped you full of him, forehead resting against your shoulder.

Instead of pulling away immediately, Changkyun remained collapsed against you, breathing heavy. You had smacked at his shoulder, but he just chuckled, arms adjusting to continue a firm hold of your legs as he stayed inside of you, trapping you against his body and the wall.

“What are you doing, Kyun?” scoffing, you had grasped his jaw, forcing him to look at you. “I let you fuck me dirty against the wall without even demanding you buy me food after. Least you can do is let me get cleaned up.”

He had gazed up at you then, eyes piercing as they looked through you, and your heart clenched tightly in your chest.

He knew he shouldn’t say it. Knew it would scare you off. And yet….

“I would, you know.” Swallowing thickly, his tongue darted out to wet his lips. “Take you to go get food. If you - I mean, if you wanted. If you’d let me.”

It was like he could see the carefully crafted defenses go up, the pain etching your brow and making your eyes go cold. Anxiety flooded his veins as you wiggled out of his grasp, sliding your clothes back into place as you moved towards his bathroom.

“You don’t mean that,” you murmured, faking a smile. “You know what this is, Kyun.”

“I do mean that!” He knew he sounded too eager, too pitiful, but he couldn’t stop himself. “I’d take you out to dinner. Or,” following you, he paused in the doorway, watching you appraise yourself in the mirror. “We could just get take-out and go somewhere private, drive to a park, bring a blanket and some booze, eat somewhere no one would know or bother us.”

Your answering laugh had sounded wrong, like it had cost you something - like it was the last thing you had wanted to do.

“Like a picnic? Changkyun, you’re saying you want to take me on a picnic? Like a proper date?”

Stuttering, he tried to explain himself, but you had cut him off with a single wave.

“Listen, we both know I’m not that kind of girl, and you don’t want me to be.” Leaning forward, you had pressed a kiss against his mouth, your eyes somber when you had pulled away, moved towards the door.

“What if I do?” His voice broke, wanting to reach out but his arms remaining stiff at his sides. “What if I want you to be that kind of girl, with me?”

Tears stung your eyes, your stomach sinking like you had been punched. You couldn’t do this, couldn’t handle the inevitable disappointment that would come when you got your hopes up.

“I’ll see you around,” you threw over your shoulder before shutting the door, and shutting him out.

Just like the hundreds of times before.

It had been two weeks now since he last saw you in person. It wasn’t for lack of trying; texting you at all hours had proven fruitless, even when he tried to send the usual ‘you up’ message like he didn’t just lay his heart out on the line. You responded airily, non committal, and he knew what you were doing.

You were trying to let him down easy.

So here he was, phone glued to his hand as he scrolled through to find your picture, clicking on it to see if there was any update. You didn’t post a bunch in your feed, but you had a tendency to update your stories often - filling them with silly memes and cute selfies, little videos of you going about your day. Cuddling with your cat, attempting to cook something for lunch. His favorite was when you would do tarot readings for your followers; the way your face would turn serious as you read the cards, passionate fire in your eyes as you helped deliver the message to its owner.

Seeing you that excited and genuine did something to him, made his chest feel like it was going to explode.

He knows you can tell that he’s watching, can see the icon of his profile showing up at the bottom of the video under “seen by.” He can only imagine what you’re thinking when you see it - that he’s a loser, this friend with benefits who turned lovesick puppy, but he can’t make himself care. It’s the only way he feels close, can pretend you’re still in his life.

He never thought that he would need you, now all he wants is to see you - for you to answer him, to come back to him.

Changkyun still sends texts, unable to stop his fingers from reaching out, despite knowing you’ll shut him down. He calls sometimes too, late at night when his blood is more whisky than plasma, though you never answer those. Instead he listens to your voicemail, eyes closed to stop the world from spinning, letting your voice lull him to sleep.

He convinces himself he’s fine with this arrangement, that things would be alright. He can just miss you from afar, observe you live your life through the pixels of a screen. That watching your stories is enough for him, will keep him afloat.

Until he sees you with someone else.

It was another Friday night he was spending alone, half drunk and on his phone, looking for your picture. Taking a deep breath, he had felt his heart stop when he saw the rainbow ring adorning your profile photo, meaning you had updated your story. Sighing, he tapped it, hoping that it would be a few videos so he could pretend for just a moment that he was beside you instead of wasting space on his bed.

The first clip was a selfie, your heavily lidded eyes staring seductively at the camera through your lashes, making his pulse jump and pants tighten. The caption “gonna get drunk tonight!” scrolled across the image, right below the pout of your lips. The next was a small video of you making a drink, giggling about the mixture of tequila and soju you were tossing in your cup, whispering to the camera how it was going to get you ‘all the way fucked up’. But it was the third clip that had his chest heaving, his lungs forgetting how to work.

You were walking out your door, a few people cluttering your front porch as you asked if anyone had a light. Some tall red headed kid - Changkyun refused to acknowledge him as anything more than that - had shouted out, and you squealed as you ran up to him, sliding directly onto his knee before switching the camera into selfie mode to capture the two of you. The next clip was you in his lap, one of your delicate hands sliding through his hair as he gave you a big dopey grin, a cigarette perched on your lips as you cooed at him and told him just how cute he was.

Fuck. He knew that look of yours, knew those moves. Knew exactly what you were doing, what you were hoping to do with that fucking Mingi kid, and he couldn’t stand it, not anymore.

Taking a few deep pulls directly from the liquor bottle, his fingers flew over the keys of his phone, sending you text after text - all of which were ignored. He knew calling would be pointless, that you would rather light yourself on fire than answer your phone - especially at a party - and he felt desperation creep up his throat, choking him.

Changkyun couldn’t let this happen. Couldn’t let you just forget about him.

Clicking back onto Instagram, he started sending you responses to the story video as he got dressed, throwing on the nearest pair of jeans and sliding on his boots.

<Baby?>

<I’m on my way. Don’t take that kid to your bed.>

It took painfully long for the Lyft to show up, and he gritted his teeth the whole route there, knee bouncing to stop himself from demanding the driver to go faster, to just hurry the fuck up and get to you.

When the car had pulled into your neighborhood, he tried to send another message, instead clicking a video. Too frustrated to change it back, he lets it record, his voice low and pained.

“I’m on my way, please let me in.”

You were alone on the deck when your phone started vibrating, the ding of an Instagram direct message making you click the app, eyes widening in surprise when you saw the number of notifications.

Changkyun, all from him.

Awestruck, you scrolled through every line, your heart throbbing with each word he had written.

You didn’t think he cared, not like that. Sure, he missed the sex, but that’s what you expected. That’s what all of them wanted when they sent you late night texts, when they called your phone at three in the morning. Empty promises and broken vows were what kept you company in the dark, when they’d predictably leave you alone with an ache between your legs and in your chest. None of them really wanted you, cared about you. After a few weeks of ghosting, they’d all disappear into thin air like expected, and your heart would harden just a bit more.

But now…

Another chime pulls you from your thoughts, eyes flicking back to the light of your phone. Instead of another direct message, it’s a notification that Changkyun had updated his story for the first time in months.

Shaking fingers slide against the screen, your vision blurring as you take in the shadowed back seat of another person’s car, the only light neon pink from the sign of the Lyft drivers decal. For a moment, all you can hear is the quiet chattering of a distant radio, of someone breathing heavily.

And then his voice croaking over the speaker, raspy with need.

“I’m on my way, please let me in.”

The video fades just as a car pulls up to your curb, a flurry of movement as Changkyun climbs out, stumbles towards you. He all but collapses into your arms, his breath dripping with liquor, eyes reddened but burning fiercely.

“Y/N,” he mumbles, hands coming to cup your face, thumb dragging against the smooth skin of your cheek. “I want to take you on a picnic.”

You laugh, though it comes out more like a sob. “What? What are you talking about? Did you call a Lyft and come all the way across town to tell me that, you clown?”

His finger taps against your lips once, twice. “Shh. Just let me-” he sighs, stomping a foot. “Let me talk.”

He waits until you nod before continuing, words surging from his mouth as if he couldn’t hold back a second longer.

“I came all the way here because I want to take you on a picnic. I want to buy you food and take you on cute little dates and do cheesy things that make you smile at me like you are right now,” he grins, pulling you until your chest rests against his own. “I’m here because I couldn’t stand you ignoring me anymore. I meant everything I said - that I miss you, that I want to be with you, if you’ll give me the chance. I want to call you mine.”

Pressing his forehead against yours, his eyes fall shut, his voice fervent and barely more than a whisper.

“I love you, Y/N.”

Tears brim your eyes, and you fight every old wound that tells you to shove him away, to call him a liar. Instead you allow yourself to follow your gut, your heart for what feels like the first time, leaning back to give him a watery smile in return.

“I love you too, Changkyun.”

His mouth immediately lands on yours, tongue eagerly tracing the seam of your lips until it’s slipping inside, tasting every inch of you, ravenous and unsatisfied until your knees are shaking. He’s walking you backwards towards the door, tugging at your clothes, and you giggle at his impatience.

Pulling away, you gasp for air, palm pressing against his shoulder to hold him back for a moment. “But listen, if I give you a chance, that means you have to stop stalking my Instagram, you creep. And don’t try to deny it, I see you all over my stories, lurking around.”

He chuckles then, nipping at your bottom lip as his eyes darken. “Please, don’t act like you don’t love the attention,”

Pushing the door open, he guides you inside, mouth working over your neck, arms wrapped around your waist until your back is flattened against the wall.

“Plus, there’s no need, now that I got you,” he confesses, his nose swiping against yours gently before he captures your lips between his own, hitching your legs to drape around his waist as he grinds against you, humming words of praise.

Just like the hundreds of times before, but now as his.

#changkyun x reader #IM x reader #changkyun smut #IM smut #monsta x smut #monsta x scenario #changkyun scenario #I.M. scenario #I.M. smut #I.M. x reader #ksmutclub #plotsofpastel #im changkyun #monsta x #monsta x fanfic #taetaesbaebaepsae #my writing #fic: call you mine #fic: cym

804 notes · View notes

yyparkq · 4 years ago

Text

hooked

characters: park sungjin x reader

word count: ~3.2k

summary: park sungjin is almost a perfect boyfriend for you...until he abruptly starts being emotionally withdrawn from you a few months into your relationship.

genre: fluff, smut

tw: mentions of anxiety, unprotected sex, slightly toxic relationship

requested by @parksungjinsfan

a/n: had tons of fun writing this really warm and cozy sungjin, thank you for the request!! tbh, i always see him as someone i’d be comfortable to share everything that’s on my mind. and i feel like he’s one of the very few people who will never judge you for your stupid mistakes but is also someone who needs to be taken care of. im blabbering too much. enjoy the story! :)

There was nothing special on the day you first met Park Sungjin. Like any other normal college student, you were able to find yourself a small circle you can trust and have fun with. Because of them, you have encountered the seemingly quiet and mysterious guy from the engineering class. He was best friends with the guy your close friend, Erin, was dating.

If first impressions last, like how they say it does, you’re fairly sure you would barely get more acquainted with a Park Sungjin. Unlike you, Sungjin is more reserved with a constant hang of serious air around him, like the type of person who barely laughs when someone makes a joke in front of him. He doesn’t always hang out with a lot of people but when he does, he’s always got an earphone dangling in one of his ears as if saying he’s only halfway present. He dresses neatly albeit casually—oftentimes in a plaid or button-down shirt and faded jeans with his dark, wavy hair falling shortly before his dark brown eyes.

He’s a pretty decent guy but not really the type you see yourself to be dating. But when you accidentally met him at the movie house alone and decided to grab dinner after, you two hit it off so smoothly. Turns out you both share the love for the book that was recently adapted onto the big screen. You two talked over dinner nonstop about the movie, how it varies against the book, the great and bad parts that were changed, the cast that played the role, the cinematography, the lines. Your exchange that night was nothing but informative and honestly, you craved more to be with him after that night so you asked him to hang out with you again. Sungjin already had a perfect proposal to invite you the second time if you didn’t ask. His mind worked extra hard trying to keep up with the conversation with you while thinking about how to ask you out for the second time at the back of his mind.

It was a ticket to an international classical play that he had up his sleeves which you gladly accepted.

One impromptu date was followed by a few more. After classes, you will meet over snacks or spend time in the library, reading and studying together. On weekends, you will try to watch movies you find interesting or go to museums.

You dating each other has not been a complete secret from your friends and you’re glad at how supportive they are to your new relationship. Somehow, you learned that Sungjin is actually an easy-going person, he talks and laughs a lot when he’s comfortable with the people he’s with. He’s knowledgable and he knows how to listen and strike up a healthy argument when needed even though sometimes he could be a little awkward and even seem standoffish.

Your friends think that your relationship is pure and innocent—almost platonic as one could say—but they couldn’t be any more wrong. Yes, you and Sungjin maintain a totally discreet relationship when you’re in public and with friends. It’s not like you have to tell anyone but you laugh inside when some of your friends ask about the status of your sex life. You never responded to such questions positively, not too comfortable in sharing such intimate details about your life with anyone, and somehow it painted an idea in their heads that you and Sungjin have never had sex yet.

The thing is, you two are fairly active in that regard. There is an unbelievably strong bond between you and Sungjin after the first date that is almost impossible for either of you to resist.

It was after the third date when you first give in to your desire. After spending time looking at ancient monarch artifacts and roaming around the museum, you were met with heavy rains the moment you stepped out of the museum building. Being in the middle of the summer, neither of you had attempted to check the weather that day for any sign of impending downpour that day. Your thin, white button-down shirt styled as a dress stuck to your skin as you both ran for his car across the parking lot, rendering your clothes almost transparent the moment you climbed into the passenger seat. The sight of you being wet and in close proximity with Sungjin didn’t help him control himself either.

“Would you like to come over to my place?” he asked coolly after giving you his spare jacket from the backseat to cover yourself. Even with his imaginations going wild, he’s still a gentleman in your eyes.

“Sure,” you nodded, well aware of what’s about to come next. It could be seen as taking things too fast but frankly, you didn’t care. You wanted this and it seemed like he did too.

You blushed when he flashed you that warm smile that reached his eyes before starting the car and driving away.

Sungjin refused to let you go home that night until you practically cannot walk. He fucked you senseless until you’re almost out of your wits, one orgasm after another until you’re quivering uncontrollably.

It has been five months since you started dating. Everything’s going pretty well in your relationship except that you are in no exception for fights and misunderstandings. Everyone says it’s normal in every relationship but for you who has barely had a serious relationship like what you currently have with Sungjin, it’s a foreign feeling trying to make amends with someone you’re romantically involved with and had to choose the next move.

This is the first major fight with him. The last five months of dating have been wonderful until weeks ago when you noticed that your boyfriend started withdrawing himself from you, physically and emotionally. This stressed you out though you still tried your best to be there for him. Whenever you two are alone, you couldn’t really talk to him about anything for more than five minutes. His mind obviously wandering off and he never realizes it when you stop mid-sentence until you’re parting ways. Whenever you try to ask what’s been bothering him, he just easily dismisses it off, saying he’s tired and he lacks sleep—which is also why you tried to limit your meetings after classes and dates, thinking it would help him a bit to spare a few more hours to rest. This side of Sungjin is completely new to you as you’ve known him for being so straightforward in telling what he thinks or feels and is usually logical with his actions. The fact that he no longer shares what’s bothering him makes you think of a hundred different reasons for being cold towards you.

Has he had enough of you? Did he realize you were too plain and boring for his liking? Were you not good in bed? Did he find someone else?

The blood on your face drained at the thought of Sungjin going out with some other girl. But you can’t stop him if that’s what he wants, can you? You can’t tell him how to feel. Of all the things, to be an obsessive girlfriend is one you’re dreading the most and after all the sacrifices and adjustments you made to try to help him with whatever burden he’s lifting, you’re determined to let him find the answers to his troubles himself. It’s not that you no longer want to help him, you love him too much, after all, but how can you help someone who refuses to help himself?

“Sweetie, have you tried talking to him again lately?” your friend, Yejin asked.

You glared at her and disappointment crossed your face. Has she really been listening to ask that question?

“No, I mean, I thought the last real conversation you had personally was like, what, almost two weeks ago? Did you try seeing him after class again after that?”

The three of you sat at your usual place in the coffee shop when your class was canceled by the professor to attend some personal matters.

Shaking your head, you reached for your cup and took a sip before answering. “I haven’t. He kept saying he’s tired and needs sleep so I gave him time to rest. And it’s been four days of merely receiving a text message from him. He won’t text me unless I text him first. I have no idea what’s happening to him,” you looked at Erin’s direction. “Did JB say anything?”

“That motherfucker doesn’t tell me any of his friends’ business, Y/N, but let me see if I can get anything.”

Even your friends who got closer to your boyfriend can’t think of him as someone who would cheat or be entertained by other girls. After a whole hour at the coffee shop trying to guess the possible reasons for Sungjin’s actions, they suggested a silly plan of making him jealous to see how he responds when you’re on the brink of being taken away from him.

You did not like the idea. It was ridiculous and manipulative. You’re no longer in high school.

“Come on, that could be a wake-up call for him. Just think of it as a social experiment and you’ll be fine,” Yejin tried to persuade you.

Ridiculously scary. Deep down, you’re also scared of how he will react to this plan. What if the situation worsens instead of getting better? He could just not talk to you again forever and you'll be dwelling in your own pain alone because of a stupid idea. But doing something is better than sulking and doing nothing, right? You’re young, and when you’re young, you can be stupid for free.

So you agreed and you started planning your own little scheme with your friends, hoping not to cause any further damage to your entire relationship.

For days, Erin made up stories about a guy from your class who is making a move on you and told her boyfriend about the plan to make Sungjin jealous. When JB said his best friend interrogated him about the innocent guy, she knew the plan will be going well so she came up with another without telling you.

As a celebration for the nearing end of the finals, your seniors decided to throw a grand party. Such parties should be considered a tradition already since almost everyone finds an excuse to get wasted after studying hard for the whole semester. You’re not one to miss such a celebration, especially when you ever really party during after the hell week.

Overhearing JB’s conversations with his girlfriend about some dude lurking around you has brought him back to his senses. For the last couple of days, he contemplated and reflected on his attitude towards you. He’s been a jerk to you lately and frankly, he didn’t know how to approach you again after that. He’s been too occupied in his own head that he forgot he actually has you now, someone who’s more than willing to share his troubles. Before he knew it, he was dashing through his car to the party where Yejin told him you’d be.

You came to the party to try to not overthink the problem between you and Sungjin. After surviving the finals week with emotional baggage, you know you deserve some booze to celebrate walking out of at least one thing alive. the last thing you hear about your little scheme with your friends is that Sungjin fired questions to JB. But he didn’t talk to you after that. Thankfully, you were also too busy to worry about your grades and it’s been a great distraction so far. Now that the finals are over, you’ll be damned again.

Sungjin found you scooping from a large tub of ice cream from the kitchen, bottles of beer and half-filled party cups surrounding you in the little space. There is a guy beside you laughing at the way you’re trying to scoop a frozen solid treat using a regular spoon. You’re too focused on what you’re doing that you didn’t see him come right in front of you.

To your surprise, Sungjin snatched the tub out of grasp and grabbed your hand. You needed a second to process what just happened but you are elated to see your boyfriend after nearly three weeks.

You let Sungjin pull you but were shocked when the guy beside you grabbed on your other wrist. What the hell? You didn’t even know his name. You saw Sungjin squint at the nameless guy and you immediately yanked away from him, wincing at the sudden jerk of your own hand immediately after.

Sungjin kept you to his chest as he waded through the sea of drunk people. All the while, you kept looking at his face. It felt months since you’ve been this close to him and at that moment, you were just ready to feed on whatever excuse he could say. He could lie to your face at that moment and you’d still be happy to welcome him back into your arms.

Merely a few feet from his car, you stopped walking and tugged on his arm. You slowly closed the distance between you two and encircled your arms around his shoulders when he turned to look at you.

Sungjin looked at your face closely, noticing you’ve lost some weight by the way the dimple on your left poked your cheek a bit deeper than the last time he saw you. His hands automatically found their way at your sides.

“I miss you so much,” you whispered while searching his eyes.

Sungjin leaned forward and kissed you feverishly. He guided you on your back until you are leaning toward his parked car. He pressed his body against you and you continued kissing until you both needed to gasp for some air. After resting for a few seconds, he began nipping and sucking on the sensitive area on your neck.

Proper communication be damned—you need him to touch you and you need it as soon as possible. You squirmed beneath him to try to close your legs when you felt wetness pooling in your panties but Sungjin’s left leg was pressed between your thighs.

He understood what you’re trying to do and immediately pressed a thigh against your core, amused to feel your wetness even through the material of your panties. His cock twitched inside his pants.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m sorry,” he repeated as he embraced you tightly and kissed your temple before opening the door and letting you inside his car drove away.

Sungjin's hands quickly reached for the zipper of your dress, letting it pool around your feet, as soon as you reached inside his apartment. In an instant, his mouth was back against yours. He lifted both your thighs to circle his hips and your arms circled his broad shoulders for support.

You felt his hard shaft poking your entrance and you reached down to undo the fastening of his pants, pulling the waistband down just enough to free his throbbing cock.

Sungjin hissed when you grabbed his cock and spread the leaking precum over his tip. “Shit-”

You bobbed your hand up and down his length until you felt being laid down on the mattress, your boyfriend hovering over you.

He bucked his hips lightly to your touch and buried his head on your shoulders, to suppress his sinful moans.

You felt his body shake and he peeled himself off of you. “Baby, stop.”

Sungjin lifted his body and kissed the side of your head before reaching out to remove your soaked panties. He kissed and occasionally nipped the inside of your thighs before nudging the tip of his nose along your slit.

“Fuck, Sungjin stop tea—” you shrieked and were cut short when he licked a stip between your folds. Your hands immediately found purchase at his hair, tugging at it every time he licked your core and sucked on your clit.

“Language, baby,” he groaned hoarsely before inserting a finger into you. He continued his ministrations to your core, adding a second and third finger shortly after. “Need to stretch you up a bit more, baby. Damn, you got tighter without my cock deep inside you huh.”

You tried to stop Sungjin’s hands when you felt your release nearing. But he didn’t budge. He even picked up the pace and encouraged you to let go.

“Are you cumming, baby?”

You bit your bottom lip and nodded, unable to stitch words at the pleasure of having him between your thighs again.

“Words, baby. Use your words. Did you miss this? My hands and cock working on your pussy?”

“Sungjin—fuck, yes, I missed you and your cock inside me” you breathed and struggled to look him in the eye. “I missed you fucking me after classes.”

The memories of Sungjin fucking you in the most boring places brought you easily over the edge. In a few seconds, you are shaking uncontrollably and you felt your juices streaming out of your core deliciously.

Sungjin smirked as he leered at your pussy leaking out of cum. His hands didn’t cease its movements and continued to fuck you with his hands. Your whole body is almost quivering.

When he sensed you’re nearing your second orgasm, he grabbed his cock and positioned himself at your entrance. He coated himself with your juices before slowly pushing inside of you.

You stiffen for a short moment, trying to adjust to his size, and then slightly rolled your hips.

“I love you,” Sungjin whispered against your ear. “I love you, Y/N,” he repeated, this time against your lips, before bottoming out and sheathing himself inside you again.

You cried out in pleasure as he started to thrust into you harder and chased your orgasm.

Sungjin remained sheathed inside you even after shooting his load, his cock warming itself pretty nicely inside your pussy as he cuddled you on the bed.

Neither of you attempted to strike a conversation. You were not sure about him but the activity rendered you rather tired. A sound sleep while being cuddled would be much appreciated at that moment. Until you heard Sungjin sigh loudly. You looked over at him and saw his eyes being distant again.

“You have that look again,” you started slowly. You propped yourself in one arm, looked at him with adoration, and stroke his cheek. “Babe, you don’t have to tell me everything all at once. But please, don’t push me away. I love you and it’s hard for me to see you suffer on your own.”

He was fazed by the sadness in your voice. How could he ever deserve a girl like you? The last thing he wanted is to disappoint and burden you with his own problems and he thought at first he’s been doing a great job with it.

Sungjin took a deep breath. He reached for your hand on his cheek and kissed it, bringing your torso against his once again. All the major problems that took the most space in his mind were spilled. He told you the pressure his family is bestowing upon him with the graduation and board exams around the corner and also their expectations for him to continue the business his father started.

You listened to his troubles. At that moment you knew you just needed to understand him, to try to perceive things in his shoes.

Sungjin isn’t the type of person who openly shares every little trouble he has as he’s afraid to burden other people. He believes everyone already has problems of their own and own demons to fight and dumping his worries could just add to that. But, oddly enough, hearing himself talk about it kind of helped to look at the situation again and evaluate his feelings and actions. As he continued to tell you his worries, he realized that it isn’t so bad to share the burden with your most trusted person.

120 notes · View notes

possiblypeachy · 4 years ago

Note

Helloo, so i loooved your last sam drake fic. & I wanted to ask you if you could write a really angsty fanfic about sam with a younger female reader, like 20 years younger (she would be 23) ? I know its a huge age gap so if that makes you uncomfortable you can leave it out but make it hella angsty still (with a fluffy ending) ? thanks in advance ❤

btw im an infp too ;)

infps rise up!!

thank you muchly for the request! i had to make some interesting google searches for this and i always count that as a win in my book!

y’know when your brain feel like a static TV? yeah, that happened to mine while writing this so i apologise in advance if this is in no way what you asked for :( HOWEVER i do hope you enjoy nonetheless! i do love sam; he’s just a little bastard :,)

warning: this details a heavy injury + a hospital trip so please don’t read on it that makes you feel horrible or anything! also, the reader is younger than same (as requested) but it’s not a like huge aspect of the plot.

if others like this too, feel free to request something from me!

― ❊ ―

You had always been interested in the hidden corners of the world. For a species that boasted about being the most intelligent, humans knew so achingly little about the world in which they lived. So, when you decided adventure called to you more than any kind of degree could, you put out a few ads in a couple of places and a certain Drake wrote back, enlisting your help with… artefact recovery. You hadn’t expected so many gunfights or bruises or those dreaded mosquitos but you certainly didn’t regret the job, coming away with a few pirate-branded gold coins and a 40-something-year-old partner-in-crime.

You probably could’ve set up for life with those coins alone-- lived a quiet life in a suburb somewhere, joined a dating app and found the love of your life, adopted a puppy, maybe-- but when Sam had called you a month or so after your Madagascan escapade, that same excitement in his voice that you’d become so accustomed to, you didn’t even need a few days to consider before asking him when the next flight was.

Now, to say that going on this rodeo was a good idea could’ve been a lie; you were still young and sprightly, and many would beg (if they even got the chance) for you to reconsider-- oh, but you have such a long life ahead of you, why are you taking it for granted?

Screw them. You’d seen more beautiful things in the past year than they would in their entire lives. So what if you had a couple of scars and scrapes to prove it; it simply adds character.

Well… perhaps this particular scrape would change your perspective on that.

You and Sam had encountered one of those forsaken puzzle things; a series of statues and corresponding paintings behind them. Each held a dagger and held their hand out to shake, a conniving little smirk etched into the grey stone. You had been so achingly confident of the answer-- nothing had gone wrong so far and you were feeling chipper. So, when you called out to Sam that you’d solved it before him, that cocky little quirk to your lips that made him huff out a laugh and shake his head, you didn’t expect his face to drop so quickly, eyes darting from your smile to your abdomen.

There was a sudden, burning pain, and you lurched forwards toward the statue, placing one hand on its shoulder to keep yourself upright. Everything seemed to blur when you looked down, the jewelled dagger now withdrawing from your gut covered in blood. The statue looked as if it had never moved, if you discounted the bloodied weapon it held and the small pool that had accumulated at the base of it. Your free hand, shaking, came down to try to stop yourself from bleeding, fingers almost immediately red and warm. “Sam--” His name was coughed out, the tension it caused making you cry out in pain.

He had seen your smile drop, your eyes widen, the blood bloom across your shirt. He had watched the statue withdraw, that grin it held now dangerous. Oh, fuck. This couldn’t be happening. Sam had promised everyone-- he had promised you that nothing like this would happen. Of course he had fucked it.

He was already there. He had been there immediately but, beyond the pain and shock, you hadn’t realised. “Holy shit! (Name)?” His hand came to your shoulder and, at the contact, you nearly crumpled, as if his touch had brought you back to reality. Unfortunately, along with that came the more acute realisation of how much fucking pain you were in.

“Oh, fuck! God--” You curled over and vomited. Fuck, it hurt. The movement made you grab at your wound more, muscles trying to tense but just searing with pain instead. Lifting your arm to wipe your mouth felt so much more difficult, lethargy already settling in it seemed.

Sam muttered something to himself, tucking his shoulder under yours and using his arm to help keep you propped up. “We’ll be alright-- you’ll be alright. We just have to get back to the car and--” he cut off, swearing, at least you thought; everything sounded like it was underwater-- muffled and slowed.

You let your head drop a little, face contorted in pain with each step you took. This wasn’t supposed to happen-- this was never supposed to happen. These trips were meant to be all beautiful vistas and treasure. You didn’t mind the occasional gunfight and, while being punched square in the nose didn’t feel great, you’d let it happen more if only to walk into more of these preserved pieces of history all over the globe. But, this? Fuck this. You should’ve been more prepared.

“Everyone said--” you groaned again and, when you were finally able to muster the strength to look at Sam, he glanced down at you with such panic in his eyes that it almost made your chest churn more than your stomach, “They said this shit would be bad for me.” The laugh you gave was painful and you regretted it immediately, stumbling over your own feet when you tried to hold your abdomen-- as if that would provide some kind of relief. It did not.

Sam furrowed his brows, moving you slightly to make sure you didn’t slip from his grip. “No, no-- it’s alright! You still got life in you.” He tried to laugh but it didn’t sound like him and that just made you spiral a little faster. “There are still places that are out there waiting for you, okay?” Sam’s voice was rushed, like he was torn between trying to comfort you and just trying to get you both the fuck out of here.

The light of the outside was blinding, the sun bright and unyielding overhead. Sam fumbled with the keys in his back pocket and then there were the telltale beeps of a car being unlocked. The sound made him flinch but you were beyond that, wanting more than anything to just sleep. It was hard to focus on anything else, actually.

Sam bundled you into the back seat and you groaned at the way your body had to twist and curve into the backseat. Every breath hurt; it was like reliving the injury each time you inhaled. Your hand was blood-covered now but your shaking had died down. It took too much energy to shake-- Hell, it took way too much to even lift your eyelids again after each blink.

When the driver’s door slammed, you jolted slightly-- like someone had dragged you out of the very early stages of sleep. “Sam,” you began, voice quiet; it was as though you were in another universe entirely, “are we gonna…” you trailed off, forgetting where you were. It was strange: you felt like the pain was subsiding. It was almost… peaceful.

The car lurched into motion and you saw him glance at you through the rearview mirror. You thought he might’ve been saying something to you, his free hand reaching back to get your attention. Black encroached on your vision and your head lolled backwards briefly but you pulled it forward again soon after as though it were attached to some kind of bungee rope. Is this what dying felt like?

Maybe you were okay with this. It was calm-- quiet, even. It was almost like the pain had become an afterthought-- a dull thrum in your abdomen. You would miss this, though: the adventures. You would miss the fact that everything seemed more colourful in other countries. You would miss the sweet tang of sea air and how free you felt on the open sea. Despite the blur in your vision, you tried to focus on Sam and his helpless mumbling. Tears welled in your eyes. God, you would miss him too.

The next time you blinked, your eyes stayed closed.

---

A steady beeping woke you up. That and a horrible white light beating against your eyelids. You tried to groan but even that was difficult with how… disused your voice felt. A chair creaked to your right and then--

“(Name)?”

It was him.

“Sam…” Trying to sit up was like an instinct but a hand came to your shoulder to keep you down. It was then that you finally opened your eyes, pupils struggling against the light. “Did you find the treasure?”

He breathed out a laugh-- almost like relief. “If you count shitty hospital coffee and the most uncomfortable chair ever as treasure, then yes.”

Your brows furrowed. “Hospital?” The strain on your voice made you cough. This was a bad reflex on your part. An ache flared up again in your lower stomach, and your arm flew there to support the injury. Now, everything was starting to come back. “Ah, shit. I remember. God.”

Beside you, his lips pursed. “Yeah. Almost got bested by a statue, honey.”

You gave him a look and he smiled. Despite his words, the normalcy of it all was comforting. “I may be bed-ridden but I’ll still hit you, old man.” There it was: that smile of yours. He struggled to even feign offence with how relieved he felt at seeing it. In fact, if your eyes weren’t deceiving you, he might’ve welled up a little. “Sam?”

“No, it’s fine. I’m fine.” He rubbed his face before leaning onto your bed. “I was just worried, is all.”

He looked like he had done more than worried; the dark around his eyes told you of that. Quiet fell over you for a few moments and Sam took to rubbing your leg over the array of hospital blankets piled atop you. It was nice, comforting, and for a time you just allowed yourself to be.

That was until he swallowed loudly-- nervously-- and withdrew his hand. “(Name), I, uh--” he cleared his throat-- not because he needed to but just so he could have a couple more seconds to think about what he was going to say, “I’ve been thinking about what happened, and I know that you’d disagree, but I’m not sure you should--”

You groaned as you shifted yourself up the bed, cutting him off. You knew what he was going to say: that you shouldn’t come on the next trip with him. That would turn into only the occasional call between the two of you, asking about his most recent escapades-- if had any spots open on the crew next time, to which he would decline. Then, there would only be texts-- a barren waste of white space between messages and timestamps that began to highlight the weeks and months between each text. “Don’t, Sam.” His brows furrowed and you pointed a finger at him, accusing. “I know what you’re going to say and I’m not going to listen to you.”

He pursed his lips briefly then pinched the bridge of his nose with a thumb and forefinger. “You could’ve died. You can’t just fuckin’ die--” he leant forward so his ranting wouldn’t disturb any other hospital dwellers, “You can’t die yet; you’re-- what?-- twenty-three?”

“Oh, fuck off, Sam! I’m not a child; I can handle myself!”

In one gesture towards your injury, he had messed up. “Obviously fuckin’ not!”

Silence. Your mouth was agape and he flinched back immediately. For how many times people told Sam to think before he spoke, he hadn’t seemed to have learnt. When the words settled in, you leant away from him, back into the cushions behind you. “I think you should go.”

He blinked once. And, then again. “What?”

You couldn’t even look at him. “Get out. I’ll call a nurse if i need help since I obviously can’t look after myself--”

“You know I didn’t mean it like that, (Name)--”

“How did you fucking mean it then, Sam?” He stood from the chair and it creaked-- the only noise in the room. You didn’t even want to give him the chance to give an excuse. “Or, am I too much of a child to understand what you mean?” In the middle of his pacing, he turned to face you, simply staring despite your ceaseless ranting. “Sorry that I’m such a huge fucking inconvenience to you! It’s not like the same kind of shit has ever happened to you or anything, huh?” He watched as your eyes began to well, face etched with frustration and betrayal, words spat out of your mouth like they put a bad taste there.

He had to cut you off or else you would carry on; you shouldn’t feel like this right after… everything that happened. God, he was such a dick. He shouldn’t have brought this up-- not now at least-- and now look at you: almost crying because of him in a hospital bed thank to stab wound that you got because of him and-- “I don’t want you to get hurt again because I fuckin’ care about you, (Name), okay?” It was his turn to rant now and your turn to stare at him. “And-- and, I have no idea what I would do with myself if you-- if you had fuckin’--” the noise he made was a mix between a sigh and growl, like he was annoyed at himself, then he leant against the end of your bed. A few moments passed; you didn’t know if you were supposed to say something to him during this or not but all you could fathom doing was to just stare at him, dumbfounded. Then, he breathed out a simple: “I’m sorry. For being a dick.”

You swallowed, gaze flickering away from him briefly. Then, you huffed out a laugh-- a terrible mix of amusement and disbelief. “Glad you can recognise it, Sam.” He blinked at you, then shook his head; that certainly wasn’t the response he expected. Something more biting-- venomous--perhaps, but not that. You gestured back to the seat that he had pulled up beside you and, with some degree of caution, he sat down again. You held out a hand and he took it, rubbing a thumb over the underside of it, touch light on your skin. “You can’t prove that this isn’t the painkillers speaking but,” it hurt to lean closer to him but you thought he was worth it-- even with the deer-in-headlights look he had, “I care about you too.”

It was then that he smiled-- grinned, even-- and you finally heard him laugh again. “Oh, I’m definitely holding that against you, (Name).”

“Will you hold this against me, too?” You pulled your hand away from his, only to place it on his face instead, thumb tracing a line over his cheek. His eyes flickered down to your lips, obviously unsure on if he should close the gap, that worry still bubbling in his lower stomach that he was daydreaming again. So, you did instead, the ache in your gut less pressing than your want to kiss him. It was short but to say it didn’t make your heart soar and a faint colour flush Sam’s ears would be a lie. You hand stayed there after, fingers reluctant to move away-- to lose him; the thought scratched at the back of your mind.

He let out a sigh of relief-- a little ‘hoo’ noise coming with it. “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted that.”

#super worried that this is subpar but PLEASE continue to have faith in me #*worries incredibly hard*#sam drake #samuel drake #sam drake x reader #samuel drake x reader #uncharted #writing

46 notes · View notes

closedafterdark · 4 years ago

Note

I am wondering if you can write a split Dahyun. Dubu your girlfriend shy and timid, politely ask to teach her how to pleasure you, but in the middle of your session her other self took over. The sweet and soft spoken gf became a monster in bed, her slow handjobs became a rough sex and both of you ended up spent.

“We don’t have to do this, you know...”

“But I want to learn. I want to pleasure you, too”

You were enjoying a comfortable night in with your girlfriend of two weeks, Kim Dahyun. You had to thank your mutual friend Im Nayeon for setting up the two of you on a blind date. She texted you both to meet her outside the movie theater one sunny day. When you and Dahyun arrived, both of you greeted each other awkwardly. She was very shy around strangers and even though you both have seen each other in passing a few times, you couldn’t exactly call each other friends. Nayeon texted you both saying an unexpected schedule came up and she was unable to make it. She told you both to have fun. You shook your head as you and Dahyun went on a very awkward first date. Over the course of it, she began to open up and be comfortable around you. You took her home that night, she told you it was a fun date. Having met up several times after, you mustered the courage to ask Dahyun to be your girlfriend. She teased you at first before accepting.

You were surprised to hear Dahyun was still a virgin. You knew she was innocent, but not this innocent. She crossed her arms and turned away from you.

“Awh, baby there’s no need to be mad” you said as you leaned closer and whispered into her ear. “Why don’t we change that tonight”

Your lips connected as you grabbed her hand and placed her on your lap. Her lips were seamless on yours. You and Dahyun had been practicing kissing a few times, she took those lessons to heart as she bit your lower lip. You of course returned her actions back. Her tongue parted your lips and entered your mouth, forcefully exploring past your teeth. Afterwards, her tongue retreated. It seemed she wanted you to do the same thing. You repeated her actions, your tongue exploring her warm and wet mouth. Dahyun moaned as your tongues battled each other for control.

Her lip gloss contained the wonderful scent of milk chocolate. For someone who never has been with a guy, she knew a bit more than she let on. Dahyun’s crotch grinded against yours as you continued to play with each other’s tongues. Both of you felt your cock hardening through your pants.

You removed your hands from her neck as they traced circles around her chest. Your fingertips were about to reach down and lift up her skirt which caused her to open her eyes and break your lips apart.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m just... really scared I’m going to disappoint you. I really really like you and feel like I’ll screw everything up and you’ll break up with me” Dahyun said as she curled up and hugged her knees.

You chuckled slightly. She really was innocent, you thought.

“Look, Dahyun. I told you we don’t have to do this if you’re not comfortable. I really like you too. I’ll never pressure you to do something you don’t want to do”

You pressed your lips against Dahyun’s once more, causing her to relax. She returned your kisses as you tried once again to lift up her skirt. This time, she showed no signs of resistance.

“Take off your sweater” you quietly said. Dahyun did so, leaving herself in a red bra that showed off her decently sized breasts. You took off your shirt and looked at her.

“Why don’t you come kneel in front of me”

Dahyun listened, throwing a pillow on the ground as she sat on it. Dahyun looked unsure of what to do so you smiled and continued instructing her.

“Now grab onto my pants and pull them down”

She nodded nervously, holding onto the waistband of your joggers and bringing it down to your ankles. You were left standing before her with just your boxers on. Your cock was poking through its cloth prison. Dahyun looked wide eyed in amazement, she also noticed a small stain where your tip was located.

“What’s that?” she asked.

“That’s my precum. It’s the pre-ejecaulate fluid. Whenever my penis gets stimulated, this helps prepare me for when I cum”

She nodded, poking it to see if it was alive. You chuckled softly.

��It’s not going to hurt you. Why don’t you take off my boxers?”

“O-okay”

Dahyun timidly grabs onto the hem of your cotton boxers and pulls them down. She gasps at seeing your penis for the first time. The cool air flowing from the air conditioner felt nice on your rapidly hardening shaft. You remove both with your feet, tossing them to a different part of the room.

“W-what do I do now?” she asked.

“Use your hand in a back and forth motion” you said.

Dahyun does so, causing you to slightly moan. She was still very nervous, but it felt nice having a hand on your cock that wasn’t your own.

“It’s so hard, oppa” Dahyun said as you both felt your cock hardening in her grip.

“Keep going Dahyun, just like that”

With every corkscrew motion of Dahyun’s soft hand, more precum began to leak out of your tip.

“Try and use your tongue along with your hand”

Dahyun listens, carefully licking the base of your cock and going upwards.

“Oh, Dahyun that feels so nice...”

She strokes your cock while her tongue swirls around your tip. She flicks her tongue on your slit and draws out the precum. For someone who never had any form of sex before, Dahyun sure was doing a good job at making you feel good.

She continues to paint long strokes to your tip, swirling around. Finally, she takes your tip in her mouth.

“A-Am I doing well?” she asked you.

“You’re doing so well. Why don’t you try to take more”

Dahyun takes your cock in her mouth once more, this time lowering herself a few inches. Your moans of pleasure inspired her to make you feel good.

“Just like that...” you moaned.

Dahyun looks at you lovingly as she gradually increases in rhythm. Her soft lips felt wonderful on your shaft. You stroked her purple hair that came in various shades, urging her to keep going. She applied more pressure as she became more accustomed to having a foreign object in her mouth. Her mouth was extremely wet, it felt blissful to you. The mess of purple hair flew in every direction as Kim Dahyun gave you her first blowjob.

“That feels so good, babe...” you said.

Dahyun’s hands were no longer on your shaft as she let you dictate the pace. You grabbed onto both sides of her head and pushed her down. She was surprised by your sudden forcefulness, groaning as you bobbed her head up and down repeatedly. Your head tilted back as you felt pleasure surge through your veins.

The sweet innocent girl in your friend group was a juxtaposition to the lust filled woman on her knees taking your cock in her mouth. Dahyun became more bold as the blowjob went on, as more of you sinked into her. You push her head downwards until she taps your thigh. You let go of her head as she struggles to come up for air. Dahyun coughs slightly, spit flowing out of her mouth and connecting onto your tip.

“Am I doing good?” she weakly asked.

“You’re doing so well, baby. I wasn’t too rough was I?”

She shook her head. “I want to practice”

Dahyun stroked your shaft several times as you felt her hot breath being blown on your underside. She takes your balls in her other hand and massages them. Dahyun smiles as she sees you groaning in pleasure.

She spits on your cock three times, using her hand to thoroughly apply the saliva everywhere. She smiles sweetly at you as her lips wrap around your tip once more.

“Oh fuck...”

You let out a loud moan as Dahyun’s lips suction onto you. Her spit attaches itself onto you once more as she grips your thighs. She was able to take you until almost reaching the base, bobbing her head up and down. You hear the subtle sounds of Dahyun gagging from your tip hitting her throat as Dahyun began to deepthroat you. You were beginning to hold your breath from how good the experience was. She sinks her head repeatedly, holding you down for a few seconds at a time until she finally withdraws her mouth fully.

This causes you to finally breathe. She doesn’t bother letting you rest as she takes you back into her mouth once more. You felt yourself about to burst soon. Dahyun’s tongue swirls around your cock, adding another layer of pleasure. Her head rapidly bobs up and down, as she fucks your cock with her mouth. The pressure building inside you is beginning to be unable to be contained. She jams her throat with your cock as spit begins to fall from your shaft and her mouth. You were pushing her head down repeatedly as you let out a loud scream, beginning to burst inside Dahyun’s wet mouth.

Her lips form an extremely airtight seal as you deposit a protein filled cream present into her mouth and down her throat. Your body squirms as you feel it course from the top of your head to your toes. Wave after wave is released, as Dahyun smiles at you. You lay down on the bed after you felt there was nothing left to release, exhausted. Dahyun releases your cock from her mouth, opening it to show you her evening snack. You watch as she tilts her head back and the present flowing down her throat. She opens her mouth once more, letting out a satisfied hum to show you there was nothing left. She climbs up next to you and gives you a tender kiss. Once you open your eyes, you see the initially satisfied look she had was soon intimidating and full of anger.

“Why did you cum in my mouth?” she asked as she began stroking your cock.

“W-What?”

You certainly didn’t expect Dahyun’s blowjob to be that good, let alone cum in her mouth. She looked so beautiful, yet something out of a terrible nightmare as her left hand strokes your cheek while her right hand stroked your cock.

“I didn’t give you permission to cum and yet you did. In my mouth no less”

“Y-Your blowjob was s-so... so good and I...”

Dahyun slapped your face as hard as she could. You looked at her, stunned she would do such a thing.

“Did you really believe my virgin act?” she said, every word dripping with venom.

“You’re not a virgin?”

“Of course I’m not a fucking virgin. Sana took that away years ago. I’ve fucked so many staff on music video sets. I even let the intern who brings me coffee cum down my throat”

“Dahyun...”

“What? Are you sad your little Dahyun isn’t the goodie two shoes I pretend to be on broadcasts?”

You weren’t given a chance to respond as her fingers trail your chest before she hovers over your now erect cock. She reached down and gripped your shaft.

“Let me show you how much of a bad girl I am”

You and Dahyun let out equally loud moans as she lowered herself fully onto your cock. She hums in satisfaction as she feels herself being filled. Her hand are firmly placed on your chest as she begins to slowly ride your cock. She starts off slow, causing you to scream internally. She grinds back and forth as she begins to establish a rhythm. You moan as Dahyun leans down and buries her head on the crook of your neck, giving you fast kisses.

“How does my tight pussy feel?” she whispered in an erotic tone as her pink lips sucked on your neck,

“You’re so tight, baby...”

“But you won’t cum inside me, right?”

“N-No, I won’t”

“And why is that?”

“Because you didn’t give me permission to”

“That’s a good boy. You must wait until I say you can fill my tight pussy with your hot, thick cum”

Dahyun’s words were doing anything but preventing you from wanting to cum inside her. She kisses your lips before raising her body back up.

“Let’s see how long you’ll be able to last”

Her perfectly manicured nails dug into your chest as Dahyun began to bounce on your cock. You moaned loudly as you watched her toss her now damp hair over to one side of her head. Her bounces up and down were not the same initially slow pace. She slammed wildly on your base, her soft pillowy bottom rippling each time it made contact with your thighs. You heard the loud sounds of skin smacking against skin as Dahyun screamed each time your hard cock filled her to the brim.

You feel the same pressure from your previous orgasm building up inside you every time Dahyun bounced on your cock. You hold onto her hips for support as Dahyun loses her mind thanks to your body. She was using you to make herself feel good. She smiled as her screams began to get higher in register, almost eardrum shattering levels. Her tight pink lips had almost the same feeling as the lips on her mouth. Your cock was being suffocated by her warm and wet walls. Dahyun didn’t care about how you were feeling, knowing only her own satisfaction had to be achieved. She slams down on you repeatedly with such force, causing you to groan.

“You want to cum soon. I can see it in your eyes” She said as a finger traces your chest.

“Do you want to fill your little Dahyun up with cum?”

“Y-Yes, please”

“How badly do you want to fill my slutty pussy with cum?”

“So, so badly...” you said.

“What if I don’t want you to cum in my pussy?” she teased.

“I’ll cum in your mouth! Or your ass! I’ll cum anywhere you want! Please. Please let me cum” you cried, desperation lingering in your voice.

She smiled, giving you a kiss as she returned to riding your cock. She bounces on you several more times before taking you back into your lips.

“I think I’ve been a too little into this roleplay. You can cum now, baby. Fill me up”

That was all that it took for you to thrust upwards and fill your girlfriend with all the frustration that had been building up inside you. Both of you moan as you feel her being unloaded into. Your energy was depleted as you collapsed back onto the bed, struggling to catch your breath. Dahyun rides you a few more times to get the last bits of lust out of her system. She feels satisfied as spurt after spurt was released inside her. Your body relaxes as your orgasm winds down. Dahyun moans as she slowly lifts herself off your cock, which plops back onto your stomach. Both of you watch as she parts her freshly fucked lips, your thick white cum flowing out of her love hole and staining the satin bed sheets. Dahyun traces a bit that was beginning to leak out and collects it. She brings it to her mouth and tastes it, humming in satisfaction. You watch as she collects as much as she can to consume her second load of the night.

You begin to catch your breaths as Dahyun finishes consuming your seed. Her intimidating aura was now gone, her bright shiny eyes having returned. Dahyun looked at you with such a soft expression, smiling brightly. She places a kiss on your lips.

“I always feel so beautiful thanks to you. I love you, oppa”

“I love you too” you reply with a smile.

“What’s say we clean up this mess?” she asks as her head rests on your chest.

“In a bit” you reply. “Why don’t we rest first before round two...”

“I can’t wait” she replies as she kisses your chest.

“Baby, I-”

She looks up and sees you have entered a deep slumber, your chest rising up and down peacefully. She smiles at you as her hand tucks away loose strands of hair.

“Rest well, baby. You’re gonna need a lot of energy saved up when Mina unnie comes over in a bit...”

#asks #twice smut #twice #dahyun

117 notes · View notes

ithisatanytime · 4 years ago

Text

“found out” she lived in florida yesterday, of course i already knew that before we started talking again, i knew everywhere she lived, i knew all her husbands names and what they looked like, i knew where she lived for ten years and never showed up uninvited after the first and last time over a decade ago.

but she did lie to me, lying by omission is still lying and while i understand her reasoning, she let me believe she was living in michigan this whole time. she also let it slip shes in a happy marriage, but that was a lie, not a lie but it isnt true. at least its not true that my suddenly. ill finish this later

its later, its not true that my suddenly showing up in there lives hasnt effected their marriage. she told me so when i asked her what her husband said about all this and he said “do whatever you want” that is not supportive approval lmao, i do not blame him i would be even worse about it. the point is its causing issues, but there are obviously already issues, blah blah blah. shes lying, im lying, everybody out here telling lies all the the time.

but i know whats true, i have a good memory when im not withdrawing from phenibut, an exceptional memory long term speaking. through our little talks i have found out that i was wrong about some things, things that caused me a lot of uneeded pain

ok i feel like its safe now. i know she still loves me, and its not just as a concerned friend. she told me so, she said i love you too twice, and i totally just brushed it off because it was wrapped up in a million qualifiers but when i told her i loved her i wrapped it up in those same qualifiers. as a christian as a friend but i just really wanted to say i love you so bad for ten years that i just had to say it while i had the chance. and she HAD to say it back, not out of social awkwardness either, i only realized this afterwards late last night while going back over our conversation in our mind, i should have heard and taken the i love you toos for what they really were.

I know deep deep down, shes still loves me, i dont buy into the wisdom of the world when it comes to love and romance, that wisdom leaves people old and alone in the end. its “new” wisdom and there is no such thing as new wisdom. matt collins DID rape her. it WAS a date rape, she DID blame herself, she COULD have screamed or fought. or even been more assertive when she said no, or she could have cried louder etc. but she wouldnt do those things because shes skye. i knew her when she was a little girl. but she blamed herself, constantly downplayed what happened because she blamed herself, and completely missed how it destroyed both of our first relationships, our most open and trusting relationship because she was trying to deal with her trauma on her own in ways that were. we dont have to get into all that. the point is i was CORRECT in my estimation of what was happening to us back then, i did spend nine years trying to get revenge or justice, i just NEEDED to confront him, just wanted to talk to him, lol. but i finally let go of that a few weeks ago or days its hard to keep track. i did everything back then that i could have done to protect her from herself. she always just trusted people too much. and after that happened and she closed herself off to me, i went mad. and i stayed mad for a LONG time. but that love is still locked away in there, she tried to forget it along with the rape that was totally not that big a deal and it was her fault anyway (her thinking not mine) i wanted to be wrong about everything, i was actually wrong about quite a lot but not about the important stuff. im not really interested in blame, i NEED that love, she NEEDS that love. i know her better than i know ANYTHING. more than i know or care about biology i have cared about her

will finish later

1 note · View note

karasumajo · 4 years ago

Text

I read through the old messages with my last favorite person.

I never realized how easily I would bend to his word and needs 😅 or just how much affection and care I'd give to him. At the time I guess I wouldn't have, I use to react purely on emotions and feelings without a thought.

I guess if makes sense that my ex didn't like him, but I would still talk to him and make time and do my best to always be there for him. Now, looking back,I guess I could see why my ex boyfriend felt the threat from him. But it was purely just friendship.

I guess I liked having someone to care about and who depended on my being there for them.

There was a conversation I saw between him and I

Him: "Are you awake?"

Me: "of course, what's up?"

Him: "I just really need someone. I'm feeling anxious, sad, I can't sleep."

Me: " :( I'm always here ____♡ it's okay. Do you want to talk on the phone? Want to come over? Want foods?"

Him: "idk, I guess not being alone would be nice, ill head over."

Me: "okay, I'll make something to eat! We can sit outside and eat! See you soon ♡"

It was like 2am. I remember that day was a terrible day at work but I wanted to be there for him lol. But it was always that way when he didn't want to be alone, and I always made myself available to him.

We even had a conversation once where he proposed that if when we are older and single, perhaps we can just have some kind of FWB relationship 😅 and I just...agreed. like I didn't even factor in how that might effect me.

Anyway, what hurt me to read was when I realized I was begging him to talk to me. I mean I don't blame him, his relationship would obviously be more important than me and also I guess having me as a friend was a liability. But I did my best to keep boundaries for him and his gf. I just wanted him to talk to me at least.

But then, one day, he said something....so ...stupid lol

We had gone to the mall together as we usually did, and his gf called, asked what he was up To.

He told her.. "I'm at the mall with my ex."

.......

Not (my name here). Not "my best friend". Not even just "my friend". MY EX. WHO TF SAYS THAT ???

So I guess she obviously was unhappy and he goes to take the call privately. I started feeling anxious and like I'm doing something wrong... 😅 when he came back I asked if that's all he sees me as? His ex? And he said Well you are, you're my ex girlfriend after all, im not going to lie to her.

I said but ____ ...I'm you're friend... 😅. And he said Yeah, but we dated. You're my ex.

So here we are at the mall, I just bought him all these gifts because yknow I'm a dumb bitch, and he's just there calling me his ex and nonchalantly... 😅

That's where things went downhill.

His girlfriend hated me. My existence. I guess rightfully so...but she never would tell him to get shit together, she would come after me about it with messages and phone calls...it was stressful lol.

Then when I thought things were fine, everything finally was hashed out, I still have my fp, his gf is actually cool, she's my new friend. Everything is fine

He blocked me.

He didn't just block me, but basically erased my existence from his life.

Couldn't text or call him. Couldn't DM him. Couldn't send him a fb message. Literally nothing.

His brother told me he got rid of all the paintings I made for him. All the gifts.

He deleted me.

And I just... didn't exist anymore.

I panicked. I got scared and I got anxious and I tried what I could to just get a word out of him, something. Just tell me WHY?????? lol..like why just shut me out, in like the most random and hurtful way possible? After everything, don't I at least deserve a heads up? An explanation? Idk, something? Fucking smoke signals? A letter? An email?????

That was it. He just deleted me. My last message to him I left on IG was

"____ I'm not even angry at this point. Just please tell me what I did wrong now? Please just tell me what happened? I'm sorry if I hurt you or if I hurt ______ in anyway...Just don't shut me out like this please. Whatever your reasons are at this point okay fine but just please tell me why and what I did. I just need to at least know.."

I got no reply back and that was the last message.

For the next following days, weeks, months. I guess I went through withdrawal of not talking to him everyday 😅 not having that friendship. I was depressed, crying all the time, anxiety would rise and fall throughout the day dramatically. I'd anxiously look at my phone hoping he'd replied. But I never got anything.

I missed him.

After some time, another person we knew told me that he was talking about me at his job. At first I thought "oh? Maybe he's thinking of talking to me again?"

But no.

He talked about what a shit friend I was. How I never showed care. How I apparently was always such a bitch and didn't know how to just chill out. How I was always so intense and my favorite "she's a mess".

He read my message, and told everyone he didn't bother replying because "how can she not see how she's a lot".

😅

So naturally, I emailed him 😂.

I told him how much I hated him, how he's a piece of shit, how dare he call me a bad friend. I told him what a little bitch he is and how I wanted to beat his face in and to stay the fuck away from me forever.

Yknow, all that good stuff...

I mean clearly, yeah, I'm a mess. But I wasn't a bad friend. That much I knew, but it didn't matter. The thoughts ate me up. The worry and overthinking had a field day in my head. The constant thought of "you see how you're so much you just fuck shit up? Why can't you just be normal?"

He made me question my own sanity, my love, the way I am. Am I really innocent? What if he's right? What I even fooled myself into thinking I'm good but really, what if I'm just so evil that I'm good at manipulating others into believing I'm good?

I still wonder that tho, I live in constant doubt of myself and my own intentions, I wonder if I'll ever be able to just be me and not feel like I constantly need to validate and confirm my own emotions and feelings accordingly. It's tiring and now I don't even know how to just react without thinking about my reactions first.

Today he tried pretending non of that happened. Like he never had anything to do with the way I am now. He smiled, he joked, he talked to me, he tried hugging me. He took me to Chipotle to get lunch. Then he asked me about how I've been and how I've been dealing with my anxiety. Because he worried.....

LOL EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME SIR???????

Needless to say I went off and told him how we are just coworkers and he lost the right to ask that question forever ago.

Still, the fucked up part is, I still miss him. 🙄 ew.

I don't even know why I'm writing all this. Maybe Because writing it makes it so that it's out of my head and here. Maybe a small part of me felt happy today because small moments felt like the old days. With his dumb jokes and always finding ways to make me laugh and smile.

Mostly I guess to remind myself why I can't let myself be swayed back in a friendship with someone like him. Because I know that if I did, it would just end the same and I would have played myself again.

Womp, well that was a lot 😅 im gonna go back to sleep now, this kinda helped I guess.

Sorry for the long rant and shit 😅 goodnight nobody and everybody!

1 note · View note

oikawa13 · 4 years ago

Text

love in the time of köttbullar

Shouyou sets the bowl on the tiny table with a flourish and an itadakimasu! and this is when it hits Atsumu harder than a Skurup to the temple:He wants this. Shouyou, hip cocked against the miniature kitchen countertop, smiling shyly up at Atsumu through the amber fan of his lashes, beautiful god-boy-man somehow glowing gold even under the buzzy LED lighting. Though they’re standing in a 430,000 square foot warehouse in Tsurumachi, Atsumu’s looking at Shouyou, and he’s home.

Amid the Flärdfull and the Smörboll, Miya Atsumu falls a little more in love.

words: 3,378 | rating: T

i’ve never been inside an ikea so this fic quite literally changed me as a person. sometimes loving a person is as scary as saying that first i love you!!!! and sometimes... love is easy as saying i love you at an ikea ; ;

LAUNCHING MERRILY DOWN THE PATH OF SIN (THE FIRST TIME)

"Bokuto said I should bring you home. But I don’t know where you live. So I took you here.”

“To hell?”

"No, Atsumu-san. To my apartment."

words: 1,990 | rating T

i wake up in the middle of the night thinking about this fic and then go on ao3 to reread it again its just so fdjgfhdjf good. i think about this shoyo a lot. theres something!!!! very dreamy going on here. this is the first part to a series btw, you can read them all if you want since theyre probably all around 1k :-)

lord i no longer believe in anything but the way he holds my name between his teeth

The miracle of the rabbit on the moon.

“We took this photo at their seventh birthday party. His father baked a cake. But someone ate all the jellybeans off the top before they could even sing the birthday song. That’s why Atsumu cried. He used to cry a lot. It stopped when the twins found out about volleyball, but before that Atsumu would cry over everything. Spilled milk. A skinned knee. The neighbor’s dog. He was the twin that was scared of paper straws. It's funny how things have changed.

“He looks happier now. Did you do that?”

words: 10,456 | rating: T

so, this goes just a liiiiitle past 10k so its up to you if you want to read it or not, i just thought i’d include it since its so! close! lol theres this part!!!!! they are holding hands underneath the table!!!!!!!!! atsumu are you drunk?!!! no!!!!! hes just so stupidly in love with shoyo. i cant stand them!!!!!!!!!!!

wait for it, wait for it

The notifications are up at 100+ again and Hana wants to check it quickly to make sure nothing's wrong, especially because she'd just cleared them before the media scrum. The fans, she figured, must be overjoyed with the win.Congratulations MSBY Nation!!! the first reply reads. #myspiker #atsuhinaBoth tags, she finds, are currently trending in Japan.

Five times #atsuhina trended on volleyball Twitter and one time it should have (but luckily didn't), as told by the MSBY Black Jackals' junior publicist

words: 6,043 | rating: T

this fic is SOOOOO much fun!!!!!! also i love hana, idk if i ever mentioned that before but yeah. this is like... hdjkdhgjfd so much ; ; <3

south of an early summer

Warmth, then, was being wanted back. Two weeks later, Atsumu holds that warmth in by Shouyou’s waist; he watches it, how it sleeps, and wonders what the heat will become next.

words: 2,602 | rating T | tw: atsumu being atsumu about (past) kg/hn for a split second

IF i wasnt an absolute fool and gave you all these recommendations to pick and choose from id just send you this and the walking emoji bc honestly!!!!!!!!! i may not know what the heck romantic means but i see this and maybe it is romantic! maybe its not the average romantic idk?!!!! but i do know theres something beautiful here. love ?? ; ;

truths in two’s

Shouyou leaves for Brazil in two hours.

words: 8,300 | rating: T

LDR.... but like, in probably one of the easiest 2 breathe/good feeling fic for ldr!!!! idk im a baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ten reasons to break up with me: a love letter

1. It has to be you, ‘cause I won’t.

words: 4,197 | rating: T

pls....... i cant even THINK about this fic without crying okay!!!!!!!! insane. fuckign!!!! i love it so much, so much. it lives in my heart. this is the fic where i was like... i dont believe in love. yes i do. no<3 YES!!!!!!!! and cried and paced my room and finally FINALLY!!!!!! stopped feeling so hurt about hinata leaving for brazil again lmao!! like, i cant explain. this sounds crazy right???? anyway, i think... atsuhina can love each other so much it hurts when theyre apart but their love is so.... i mean......... they literally waited years to play together... so......... their love keeps them going..... GOODBYE!!!! i love listening to fka twigs cellophane & home with you and just..... being insane.

just can’t help myself

Five times Hinata takes care of Atsumu, and one time Atsumu returns the favor.

words: 5,025 | rating: T

*think about atshn taking care of each other* *cries*

blue crush

And there’s a promise there, sewn into the easy curve of his lips: I’m not going anywhere, Atsumu-san. Glittering eyes that cut through the rain-blurry dark like a beacon when Shouyou turns back to look up at him. Even if you fuck up all of our dates.

Murphy’s Law as demonstrated by Miya Atsumu.

words: 2,297 | rating: T

atsumu trying very hard to have things perfect and romantic and even in the failures its still very lovely<3

If I’m Icarus, You Must be the Sun (Allow me Three Mistakes)

He wonders if Icarus felt like nothing was wrong with self-destructing, because he had reveled in the sun, if only for a little while.

Atsumu finds, loving Hinata is the same.

Atsumu's love over the years, and the mistakes that accompany it.

words: 4,620 | rating: T

i am...very weak to the whole icarus/sun thing with hinata and his ships. this one though......... i think about it A lot.

in your eyes, i see our future

“Yer’ a real sweetheart, Hinata Shouyou.”

Shouyou smiles brilliantly. “Only for you~”

He scoots over so Shouyou can sit next to him. He can smell the pineapple body wash Shouyou is so fond of the moment he sits down. Shouyou passes the tray over carefully before settling against the headboard comfortably.

“What’s the occasion?"

(Or, Atsumu just really wants to marry Shouyou.)

words: 9,769 | rating: T

fhdsjjkjfdsj goes crazy stupid over marriage!!!!! listen... i do not believe in marriage!!!!! but for atsuhina, oh you bet i do!!!! :-)

breathing a hello

There’s no significance to them ending up here except that both of their lives are held in the sway of volleyball. Everything else comes second.That’s the crux of it, really.

words: 2,826 | rating: T

gjhfsjkfd shhhhhhhhh. my heart is very soft when i think of them here, please..... just!!!! pls.

if you’re out there in the cold, i’ll cover you in moonlight

My [23M] best friend and ex-boyfriend [23M] is visiting me for a week, and my current boyfriend [24M] who agreed to all of this is suddenly withdrawing from me. Can I get some advice? Please? Anyone?

words: 8335 | rating: T | chapters: 3 | tw: past kg/hn 😳

this one is optional since you wanted one shots and theres 3 chapters here. my idea of romantic is...well, i especially love when one of them is acting hurtful/mean/difficult to the other bc their own personal issues but the other loves them anyway??? and then they work on that issue!!! just!!!!! ; ;

Love in the Time of Insomnia

And anyway Hinata was sprinting out faithfully after Atsumu, who had keys to the gym like a badass, and who was going to give his spikers a few more tosses after-hours without Meian knowing like the greatest, most generous badass the Jackals had ever seen.

words: 2,457 | rating: G

running four kilometers just so atsumu can rest. this is what romantic means!!!! hdkshjfhdj

ode to what you’d have been

5 times it’s Kageyama’s fault and the 1 time Hinata realizes it has never been.

words: 3,628 | rating: G

loving someone including their flaws PART 2!!!!!! ok.... u might be like... um... this is romantic? hfdkhjfd LISTEN!!!! to me!!! there is nothing more romantic than being in love with someone and the ugly parts of them. going, i love you, all of you. and communication!!! and understanding!!! and feeling terrible and shitty and horrible but having the one you love accept you. and trying to help ease your mind, worries. *sobs real hard* also shout out 2 ‘okaaayy.... i hate sakusa now’

a shrine for a boy

Despite his uncertainty about how to tell Atsumu of his move to São Paulo, Hinata takes action. Things do not go according to plan.

words: 2,447 | rating: G

hinatas time 2 be romantic and fail but its ok bc!!!!!!!!!! :-) they are just dummies in love<3

the greatest distance between you and longing is defeat

(In other words: Atsumu, let go. I’m here now.)

words: 3,310 | rating: G

um... *cries* post break up.... o_o!!!! god they really thought they could????? lmao!!!!!!

the tear in this (our gentle language)

“I’m going back to Brazil.”

He isn’t asking for permission. This isn’t a consultation. Hinata Shouyou informs his boyfriend at their after-practice practice. Miya Atsumu has a volleyball in each arm, trying to pick up a third. It drops and rolls away from him. The thud resounding in an empty gymnasium.

Shouyou had tried to envision Atsumu’s reaction many times. He never expected to be met with silence.

Alternatively: an exploration of Hinata Shouyou’s return to Brazil

words: 7,204 | rating: M

ldr CAN be romantic ok!!!!!!!! it takes a lot of communication, time, and love ; ;

evening sun

Atsumu looks at Shouyou and thinks, I want to know every inch of you.

words: 1,502 rating: M

1 note · View note

silvanable · 5 years ago

Text

Match-Up : Ikemen Sengoku

@nad-zeta

Hi there love! I hope you are doing well! Can i please request a ikemen sengoku matchup. ^0^

❤🥰 i am a aries, infp, Hufflepuff female 🦊 i am shy and difficult to get to know (apparently it took me 2 months to start opening up to my friends, ooops), i tend to bottle up my emotions, my friends would likely describe me as incredibly stubborn, gentle, kind, over dramatic, goofy and fun loving. I am pretty aloof and blunt, i like i will 9/10 times tell you to your face how if feel about you if you ask 🙈once u are part of my inner circle i am playful, teasing, i am an extremely sarcastic person that makes snarky remarks under my breath and my kind of humor is a bit of dark and self deprecating. I will definitely be the person making jokes at inappropriate times and something about inappropriate things (its one of my coping mechanisms) 😂 I love my friends and family and will fight anyone how threatens them, although when it comes to me you can do or say anything to me and i wont do anything (I honestly cant stand up for myself). I swear like a sailor although i am trying to get that under control, however the road rage is real.

i love nature and animals (i love my lil bunnies and dogs), i love working out/going to the gym #gym is life (it is one of my coping mechanisms and has helped me slowly overcome an eating disorder)😂

i enjoy cooking (i am now officially a chef), wine tasting (fancy way of saying getting very tipsy of different wines most nights), spending time with friends (especially if there is tea to be spilt) although i do need lots of alone time to recharge my social battery, i like conspiracies, reading, writing (Fanfics and im busy with my Masters in nutrition >“<), romcoms, and sleeping. As much as i love spending time outdoor i also enjoy lazing around the house being a lazy potato. I definitely zone out and daydream all the freaken time

I tend to blush easily which i hate 🙈 My face will give away what i am thinking. i enjoy my own alone time and i definitely dont like crowds and loud sounds (ie you will never find me in a club). I am a picky eater despite my degree in cooking (i basically only eat candy, carbs and protein), i love cuddles although i look like someone that wouldn’t. Ive been told i come across as calm and confident, while in truth on the inside i am really scared and insecure. I am incredibly awkward when it comes to boys and have been told my sarcastic comments are x100 when i talk to them (oops).

I am very go with the flow, and i never burn my bridges 🙈 i am very forgive and forget🦊, like no matter how badly you hurt me.

🙈 Thanx so much dear ❤ Sorry if this is TMI🔥Cant wait to see who i get matched with 🌈🎀

✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦

oh chica, i absolutely adore you just by this description.

i definitely had a fun time sorting out who i think would best compliment your personality & it was most certainly a tough one to settle on but in the end there must only be one~

i hope you enjoy it!

✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦

↪ GUIDELINES

✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦

ー SHINGEN TAKEDA : TIGER OF KAI

after long debate i can see you and shingen as being a very favorable pair.

for starters, while you might not believe it you do have some very parallel personality traits (especially those based on your star signs!!).

you both have a rather optimistic disposition and a value for honest because shingen has never lied he just avoids answering questions.

additionally, you are both very difficult to get to know, as you have a tendency to bottle up your true feelings or are too shy and reserve to open up.

besides you being a beautiful woman, that would intrigue shingen even more. he wants to know why lies behind that quiet & guarded mask, to see what’s in your mind.

your dark humor & self-deprecating jokes would certainly concern him at first, especially because a “goddess such as you should never doubt yourself”.

i feel like what you said on being awkward around the menfolk would make you somewhat resistant to his flirt.

and by resistant i mean you turn red in a full blown blush and completely withdraw on yourself. you’d be lucky to get out a thank you or might completely bat the compliment off with a snarky comment ( and we’re on the inappropriately timed jokes too! ).

everything he learns about you is something new and surprising & he would be absolutely enthralled with you.

you’re a chef from your time? he’d love to watch you cook and savour whatever meal you’d be so generous as to let him taste.

you love to write & read? conspiracy theories? he would ask you all about what you read, what you’re interested in writing, and even indulge you as you ramble on about your favorite conspiracies.

then there’s your protective nature.

you take insults or things against you without batting an eye, but the moment someone insults him or any of those you care for, suddenly a warrioress comes out in you like he’s never seen.

you’re shy one day and another you’re so straight forward with him, he values that courage, even if you do not see it, and how honest you are. he admires honesty.

finding out you swear like a sailor would surprise him the most.

he has such a fondness for this young, gentle, and very fun & loving women and sudden she’s in the garden, profanities leaving her mouth in a never ending string after stubbing her toe ( can’t tell me that it doesn’t hurt enough NOT to swear ).

this man would have to do a double take just to make sure his eyes & ears weren’t deceiving him.

shingen would absolutely tease you about that later, how such an angel could have such strong words.

your passion and dedication to your work is something else shingen would find admirable, as he understands having a love of something you do & the beauty of being able to create it.

he is super attentive & always watching over for you and your moods.

you’re upset? he can see it in everything you do.

tired out and need a little you time? he’ll arrange for you to be undisturbed for a time and offer to bring you sweets to snack on & a book to enjoy your alone time with.

you are his angel of beauty and kindness, his goddess of ever compassionate forgiveness, and everything he comes to hold so dearly, meaning he will shower you endlessly with compliments & gifts if nothing more than to see you smile.

at kasuyagama you’re the castle’s mediator, as your personality seems to lean more towards peace & calm.

all that really means is you end up stopping shingen from teasing kenshin & keeping kenshin at best you can from being overly stabby.

i have to throw in that dates would be of the utmost importance to shingen with you.

he would have to take you to ever possible tea house to get you to try all of his favorite sweets and he would absolutely be abusing the fact you love them to against you to indulge you both.

yukimura would not be happy with either of you for constantly eating sweets & junk because it’s bad for your health and you need actual food to survive.

all. the. snuggles.

you have a favor for a calm & quiet atmosphere, so i can see you and shingen spending nights on the terrace in the cool evening air to admire the stars & moon.

correct me if i’m wrong, but you trapping shingen for morning cuddles? just five more minutes then you’ll let him go not really.

✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦

#ikemen sengoku #ikemen series #cybrid ikemen #ikesen #match-up #shingen takeda #ikemen sengoku shingen #ikesen shingen

14 notes · View notes

xsixxx · 5 years ago

Text

Bad Influence - Chapter 10

Word Count - 5.5K

Authors Note - It's what ya'll have been waiting 10 chapters for, fingers crossed it doesn't disappoint 😂

Warnings - Filthy dirty sleazy smutty smut, language as always, angst, Nikki not giving a fuck about anyone but Nikki

Tags - Tags: @triplehaitches @freddiessmallnipples @queen-crue @scarecrowmax @lovesick-heart0 @littlesunnymoon @80sheart-strings @cranberribread @inthebackofmycarlaytheirbodies @versnatasha @zoenicoles @crazysaladchopshop @ggorehorror @lunamadhatter99 @justtryingtoovercome @chaoticvybe @you-know-im-a-dreamer @eightiesrockbaby @valentines-in-london @xrosegoldwolfx @fupatroopaa @lilypetite88 @this-blog-must-be-the-place @ashleecrue @lauravic @dark-princess99 @unknownoblivion @mgkobsessed @antheasnow

(Nikki attitude this whole goddamn chapter)

"Beth, you can't hide in your bed any longer, get up." Came Sophias stern voice as she tore the covers off of me. I groaned out loud, grabbing ahold of them, pulling them back over me, tucking it right under my chin for extra comfort.

"Leave me alone Soph, I'm sick." I mumbled pathetically.

"Girl, you can pull that shit with Paul to get outta work but I'm not buying it. You're fine, you're just feeling sorry for yourself & you need to get over it." Sophia snapped, always one for the gentle approach. She sighed as she sat down on the edge of my bed. "You can't avoid Nikki forever."

"Why would I be avoiding Nikki, I haven't done anything wrong?" I muttered, fidgiting a little & purposely avoiding eye contact.

"No, exactly, you haven't, so why are you pulling a sicky?!"

"I'm not!" I replied, a little sharper this time. "Soph look, I just don't feel well, ok? Most friends would offer to bring me soup or something, not give me the goddamn third degree."

"Fine, fine, whatever you say." Sophia resigned, putting her hands up in defeat as she rose from my bed. "To be fair to you, you must be ill because you look like shit." She laughed as I threw a pillow that narrowly missed her face. "But don't pretend like you're not avoiding Nikki, that boy has left 3 voicemails in the last week asking if you're ok. At least phone him back & let him know that the 'fever' hasn't taken you just yet." She winked as she used air quotes to emphasise her shit eating sarcasm.

"Whatever," I groaned, pulling the covers over my head, "I'll do it after my nap now can you please go get ready for work, you're gonna be late & you're getting on my nerves."

I heard Sophia scoff as she left the room, closing the door behind her as she went.

Ok, maybe she was right, maybe I had been avoiding Nikki. But not on purpose, I was actually sick. Sort of. Mentally drained counted as sick in my book.

I yanked the covers back from over my head as I let out an over dramatic & exasperated sigh. It'd been a week since I'd practically ran from the Mötley house like a scared, overwhelmed teen who'd realised that maybe they weren't cut out for hanging around with the popular kids.

I don't really know what happened & that's probably the thing that scares me most.

One minute I'm in Nikki's room, listening to his music &, I think, kissing him?

Then I was back with Tommy, snorting more lines & drinking so much I'd be surprised if there's any booze left anywhere on the Sunset Strip, because I'm pretty sure I drank it all.

Next thing I knew, there was a guy getting a little too handsy, feeling me up & trying to guide me into the bathroom with him. And what scares me most is knowing that I was definitely too fucked up to have stood my ground if push had come to shove. If Nikki hadn't have overheard & come out his room when he did, that guy could've easily snuck me away from the party & no-one would've been any the wiser.

Fuck.

I'm supposed to be the sensible one.

How had I let myself get so wrapped up in this lifestyle that is, in reality, a million miles away from my own?

I'm not a rockstar. I'm not a groupie. I'm not a party girl.

I'm a psychology student with deadlines to meet, debt to pay.

I didn't want a bad boy who'd drop me as soon as he's had his fill, I wanted a steady boyfriend that'd take me on dates, had a stable job & that my father wouldn't despise.

I had always had a plan. I was going to get my degree, have a career & a marriage & a family, maybe a dog, & be happy.

So what was I doing down this path to depravity?

I rolled over & buried my face in my pillow as I let out a exasperated groan into the soft void.

I just didn't belong in Mötley Crüe's world.

*Later*

A sudden, sharp rasp on my bedroom door jolted me awake.

"Beth, stop pretending you're sick, you got a visitor." Soph yelled through the wood before throwing the door open & shoving a slightly pissed off looking Nikki into my room.

"Sorry, late for work, gotta run!" Sophia voice rang smugly in a sing-song voice as she rushed away from my room & down the hall. I listened to the patter of her heels along the flooring, then the sound of her unlock the front door & before slamming it with purpose to announce her departure. I scowled at the space she had stood in just seconds before, mentally cursing her out.

I glanced at Nikki who had lifted a judgemental brow, eyeing up the sight of me in my pyjamas, unbrushed hair & no make up, napping at 4pm.

"Oh you because you've never woke up in worse states." I shot at him defensively, scrambling to sit up, pulling my knees into my chest under the covers. "What do you want Sixx?" I mumbled awkwardly, scowling at the wall whilst I refused to make eye contact.

"Beth, I've left you messages. What, you couldn't be arsed to pick up the phone & let me know you're ok?!" He asked sharply, his expression clearly annoyed. "I was wo-" he checked himself, cutting off the statement, but it was too late.

I smirked a little. "Nikki Sixx, were you worried about me?"

"No, I wasn't worried, I just-"

"Turns out the bad boy has a soft side." I teased.

Nikki's face grew red as he brow furrowed in frustration & embarrassment. "Oh yanno what, just fuck it, I shouldn't have bothered.." he murmured to himself, turning on his heels & walking back out of the bedroom door.

"No wait Nikki, c'mon I'm sorry, I was only joking, I'm sorry!" I called after him, causing him to stop & cautiously turn back around. "Please just come back in here." I pouted at him. Nikki's face softened & he came & stood at the foot of my bed, his fingers absentmindedly tracing the ornate bed frame.

"I'm sorry if I freaked you out the other night." I heard him mumbled quietly, almost as if he was hoping I wouldn't quite catch it.

"You didn't freak me out, it was that guy.." I trailed off, letting my eyes follow Nikki's hands that was still dancing along the footboard. "Thank you, for stepping in, god knows what could've happened if you didn't." I said quietly, finally lifting my eyes to his just in time to catch his dart across in my direction. Our eyes met & Nikki acknowledged my thanks with a little awkward nod.

"You're welcome." He replied with a little cough, trying to hide his discomfort at the whole situation. “So, um, why have you been avoiding me? Yanno, if its not because I scared you?” He stumbled.

I hung my head slightly, unsure of how much truth to share. I couldn’t tell him it was because being a groupie didn’t exactly fit into my life plan. Christ, I hadn’t even slept with the guy & I’m already getting ready to run away because he’s not marriage material. I let out a soft, unamused chuckle at my own ridiculous reasonings. “Nikki, I just..” I decided to share a little bit of truth. “I just don’t fit in.” I blurted out.

Nikki let out a short, almost relieved laugh. “What?” He asked, bemused now.

I shook my head, hearing how must’ve sounded. “I mean, I just don’t fit into your world. I got swept up in having fun with you guys, but I’m just not that girl. I don’t know, I guess I got carried away with it all.”

Nikki looked at me intently, pondering what I'd said before carefully responding. “But, you had fun right?”

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, of course I did. But that’s not the point.”

“Of course that’s the point!” Nikki cut in quickly. “Beth, you were the one that told me you lived wrapped up in goddamn bubble wrap, not able to do what you wanted or enjoy yourself.”

“Yeah, but only because Daddy wanted to protect us!” I said defensively.

“And now you’re a grown ass adult Lizzy.” Nikki’s expression softened a little & he hesitantly reached for my hand. “Look, I know your dad wanted to look after you and all that, but you can’t let what happened to your mom stop you from living your own life.”

“I’m not, I just..” I let the sentence trail off. “The other night just made me realise how reckless I’m being. This isn’t who I am. The drugs, the partying, ever since I met you guys I’ve just been someone that I’m not & just think need to distance myself, ok?”

Nikki shrugged, withdrawing his hand from mine a little sharply. “I get that sometimes were a little much & we can take things a bit too far, but don’t put your twisted daddy guilt on me & my band. You chose to come to our parties, no-one forced coke up your nose or pushed you into bed with Vince, you did all that shit because you wanted to & because you enjoyed it. Look, I’m not gonna beg you to stick around if that’s what you’re waiting for because that just isn’t me. If you wanna stay away, that's cool, we'll leave you be. But for what my opinion is worth, which probably ain’t shit, I think you’re being hard on yourself. You’re not a bad person for enjoying the darker side of life.” Nikki’s voice was blunt & hard, but I could hear the sincerity in it too. “Beth, you’re punishing yourself for having fun.” He finished.

Fuck, he was right.

We sat in silence for a couple of minutes, Nikki’s words lingering in the air as I absorbed what he’d said, trying to figure out where my head was at. I knew that what he was saying was true, but that didn't give me an excuse to go out & do whatever I pleased. I had to take responsibility for my life, be sensible, make the right choices.

Right?

Eventually Nikki rose from the bed, rocking on his heels as he tried to find words to try & clear the awkward atmosphere.

“Ok, well I think maybe that’s my queue to go.” He announced, leaning in to me & giving me a light peck on the forehead. “I hope you figure all of this shit out Beth. Don’t let your dads fears stop you from enjoying your own life. Do what you gotta do, but don’t forget to do what you wanna do sometimes.” He said as he walked towards the the open door. He paused in the doorway, turning his head slightly to look at me & gave me that infamous smirk one last time. My stomach flipped at the sight. “I’ll miss ya, Lizzy." He winked before walking away, down the hallway & out of sight. I let out a breathe I hadn’t realised I'd been holding in as I heard the door open & shut, the click of the latch catching sending a feeling of regret run cold though my body.

Fuck.

I threw the bed covers off of me & ran down the hallway, my bare feet slapping loudly on the laminate flooring. I reached the front door & took a deep breathe, my mind made up as I wrenched open the door & flew down the first set of stairs, not putting another thought into what I was about to do. I ran down the second flight, almost crashing into Nikki on the landing between staircases. I didn’t give him chance to react as he spun round, about to curse out whoever had nearly sent him flying. I grabbed a hold of his face, kissing him roughly & deeply. Nikki’s body went from rigid & angry to relaxed & smug in an instant, his hands snaking around my waist, pulling me in closer as I could feel his smirk beneath my lips. He finally broke the kiss, leaning away from me fractionally to give me a bemused, sly look. “What are you doing?”

“I’m doing what I wanna do.” I quoted him as he chuckled darkly.

“Good girl.” He mumbled against my lips, those two words, mixed with the taste of his kiss making me weak. I took his hand & lead him back up the stairs, feeling his eyes trailing along every inch of my body with every step I took.

We reached the front door & I went to reach for the handle, but Nikki grabbed my wrist, spinning me back around & pushing me up against the wall. He pinned both of my hands above my head with one hand as his other trailed along my lips, down my neck and lightly across my chest. His eyes didn’t leave mine the whole time, his hungry gaze enough to undo me right there & then. He pressed his lips roughly against mine as his fingers carried on their journey down my stomach & along the waistband of the little pyjama shorts I was wearing. He let them dance teasingly along my exposed skin before he slid his hand under the fabric, stroking me on the outside of my panties.

I tried to wriggle my hands free to grab his hand, conscious of the fact that anyone could walk past us, but Nikki only tightened his grip in response.

I pulled away from his kiss, trying to ignore how good his fingers were making me feel. “Nikki, I have neighbours!” I hissed. “What if someone walks past us?”

Nikki smirked once again. “That’s the point Angel. Best keep quiet.” He winked as his fingers expertly moved my panties to the side before sliding inside me, making me gasp with pleasure.

“Nikki, c’mon, I mean it!” I tried to protest as his fingers began to rhythmically pump against my wetness, his thumb finding its way to my clit & rubbing in small circles, making me moan out loud against my better judgement.

“Nikki..” I trailed off, forgetting what I was complaining about as he picked up speed, letting my eyes close. I stopped caring. I couldn’t focus on being mad, I could only focus on him. I rocked my hips against his hand, our rhythms syncing perfectly causing new waves of pleasure that I couldn’t hide. I desperately tried to stifle my moans, but Nikki wouldn’t let me. His fingers worked faster & harder, driving me closer & closer to the edge.

I opened my eyes to see his fixed on me, his lustful gaze soaking up the sight of me coming undone in front of him like he’d wanted for so long.

Nikki smiled darkly & leaned in to me, letting his lips brush my ear lobe as he whispered “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to see you give me that look.”

“What look?” I managed to gasp between my soft moans.

“The look you give when your wet, begging for my touch.” He chuckled. “Now cum for me, Angel. Right here, right now.”

His commanding words almost pushed me over the edge & I closed my eyes once again, letting my head tilt back as I got ready to indulge in my release.

But my eyes snapped open at the sound of the door to the building opening 2 floors below. I heard footsteps begin to ascend the stairs & I wriggled against Nikki’s grip once again, but his smirk only grew wider. “Nuh-uh Princess, not until you cum.”

“Nikki, this isn’t funny!” I shot at him quickly, but his fingers didn’t stop. His thumb carried on trailing delectable circles on my clit as his fingers moved quicker inside me, pushing deeper. I listened to the footsteps grow closer as my orgasm did the same, until I couldn’t stop it. Nikki’s lips crashed against mine to silence the moans of ecstasy that wanted to escape my mouth as I came around Nikki fingers, the urgency & danger only adding to the intensity.

Nikki swiftly removed his hand from my panties, licking his fingers & winking at me as I straightened up just in time for Mrs Salvador, our upstairs neighbour, to appear in view as she made her way up the staircase with grocery bags in either hand, smiling when she spotted me.

“Good afternoon, dear!” She beamed as I smiled politely.

“Good afternoon Mrs Salvador.” I managed, still flustered.

“And who do we have here?” She nodded in Nikki’s direction.

“I’m Nikki!” He responded all chipper & pleased with himself.

“Well nice to meet you Nikki, I’d shake your hand but I best get these bags upstairs.” Mrs Salvador smiled as she carried on her way.

Nikki shot me a sly look, smirking a usual. “Probably for the best.” He chuckled back to her, shrugging as a took a swipe at him when Mrs Salvador’s back was turned.

He grabbed my waist & pulled me towards him as he reached for the door at the same time. “Now, I’m not done with you.” He growled, nipping at my neck before opening the door & pulling me through.

Now safely on the other side of the door, I felt more confident as I kissed Nikki roughly, trailing kisses along his jawline & down his neck, softly biting as I went.

“My turn.” I mumbled against his skin, before dropping to my knees without hesitation.

I unlaced his tight leather trousers, lifting my eyes up to meet Nikki’s, pulling my bottom lip between my teeth as I watched him appreciate the sight of me on my knees in front of him. I flashed him a smirk of my own & placed light kisses along the waistband of his trousers before reaching into them & pulling out his swollen member.

*Nikki’s POV*

Beth lifted her eyes to mine once again as she slowly licked the tip, teasing me, waiting to see my reaction. I let out a low groan watching her smirk & circle her tongue around the head of my cock before taking it into her mouth.

“Fuck” I hissed through my teeth a I felt Beths hot, wet lips wrap around my dick & watched her delicate hands wrap around the base, working it slowly to begin with. I felt myself grow harder in her mouth, my eyes fixated on the sight of her with my cock between her perfect, plump lips.

She picked up speed, running her tongue up & down the length of me, applying just enough pressure to make me curse again. I threw back my head & let a low moan escape me. I grabbed a fistful of Beth’s hair, bucking my hips against her as she pumped faster, using her hands to work what her mouth couldn’t reach.

“Christ, you have no idea how many times I’ve thought about fucking your pretty little mouth.” I grinned between my moans of desire. Beth looked back up at me, eyes so innocent I could’ve cum just from the look she gave me. She groaned around my cock, sucking me deeper into her mouth, her one hand finding its way to me balls, fondling them & causing me to groan louder as the pleasure increased.

I thrust my hips against her, helping her take all of me into her throat. I felt the sensation overwhelm me, pushing me closer to cumming, but I wasn’t gonna cum like this.

I put my fingers gently under Beths chin, lifting her face to look at me, her lips still wrapped around my dick. I groaned at the sight once more, fighting the urge to let her just carry on until I came in that perfect mouth.

Instead, I took her hand & helped her to her feet, running my hands through her blonde hair & kissing her before leading her towards her own room. I shut the door behind us & pulled off my tshirt before pushing Beth on to the bed. I pulled off her top, revealing her lack of bra & climbed on top of her, placing kisses lazily across he chest until my lips brushed against her nipple. I nipped it gently, causing a sharp inhale of breath from Beth, before taking it into my mouth & sucking as I used my thumb & finger to caress the other one. Beth let out a delicious whimper & I continued my trail of nipping & sucking down her stomach to the waistband of her shorts.

I slowly pulled them off along with her panties, revealing Beth’s perfect little pink pussy, glistening with her wetness. I bit my lip at the sight, desperate to taste her.

I placed kisses along Beths thighs, sucking lightly as I made my way inwards until my lips brushed against the ones between her legs. I felt her abs tense & heard her draw in a sharp breathe as her hand came down & rested on the back of my head, her fingers getting lost in my hair. I continued kissing around her pussy, making Beth squirm until she couldn’t take it anymore. I let my tongue drift towards her clit, lightly brushing over it before applying a little more pressure & swirling my tongue against her. Fuck, she tasted like heaven.

“Fuck, Nikki!” Beth called out, whimpering & moaning as I smirked against her clit. I had waited too damn long to hear her call out my name, it sounded so fucking sweet on her angel lips.

I carried on circling my tongue as I eased my finger inside her, gently thrusting it in & out until I heard her breath quicken. I let it get faster & faster, listening to her orgasm build up until her fingers started to tighten in my hair & then I simply stopped.

“Sixx, what the fuck!” Beth panted, lifting her head up to look at me. I gave her my best smug smile as I pulled off my leather pants & climbed back on top of her. I let the head of my cock rub against her clit, causing an involuntary moan to escape her mouth into mine as I kissed her.

“You can cum when I do, Princess” I smiled wickedly, climbing off of her to find a condom. I always kept one handy in my trouser pocket. I ripped open the packet & rolled it on, moving back over to Beth & flipping her over, so she was on all fours, knees on the edge of the bed, ass in the air & that cute little pussy on full display for me. I let my cock glide up & down the length of her, spreading her wetness around as she whimpered for me.

“Tell me what you want, Angel.” I teased.

“You.” I heard her whimper as her ass wiggled in the air as she tried to back herself up onto my throbbing cock.

“Uh-uh Princess. Tell me what you want.” I demanded, giving her wet pussy a sharp little tap with my hand, causing a gasp, followed by a moan to emanate from Beth.

“I want you to fuck me, Nikki!” She choked out between moans as my fingers brushed lazily against her clit.

“Ask nicely, Angel.” I warned.

“Please Nikki, please fuck me!” Beth cried out desperately “Fuck, I want you inside me.”

I teased her entrance with the tip of my cock, prolonging her desperation for just a second longer as I appreciated what it was like to finally have her at my mercy before I eased myself inside of her. Her warmth was enticing & her wetness made it easy to push my whole length deep inside her. Beths moans were fucking music to my ears as she called out my name, signalling me to pick up the pace.

I grabbed a hold of her hips, digging my fingers into her delicate skin, instantly colouring her pale skin a nice shade of purple underneath my fingertips. I grinned at the sight; a reminder for her later.

I started thrusting, finding my rhythm as our moans synced along with our hips. I started out slow, thrusting deep as Beth cried out.

“Fuck Sixx, you’re so big!” She moaned as she inevitably pulled away from me. I slapped her ass & pulled her back to me, burying my dick back inside her. I grabbed her hair as I picked up the pace, thrusting harder & faster as Beth got more comfortable, pushing her ass back against me, matching my rhythm.

I brought down a sharp slap on her ass once again as she called out my name. “I’m gonna cum Nikki!” She yelled out.

I chuckled harshly. “I told you, you cum when I do, doll.”

I slowly pulled back, almost all the way, before pushing my cock back in, hard, making her take all of me. Beth let out yell of pleasure & pain, pulling away from me once again, causing me to pull out.

I released my fingers from her hair & I lay down on the bed, motioning for Beth to get on top. She didn’t need telling twice.

She eagerly straddled me, placing her knees either side of my hips before she reached for hungrily for my cock, positioning it beneath her, sliding herself down on to me with a deliciously slow pace that nearly made me cum.

“Fuck Beth!” I called out, grabbing her hair & pulling her lips to me, tasting her sweet kiss as she slowly rode my cock.

Beth sat back up, placing her hands on my chest to steady herself as she thrust up & down on my dick. I reached my hand up past her bouncing tits to her pretty neck, wrapping my fingers around it & squeezing, gently at first, trying to gage her reaction. Beth drew her bottom lip between her teeth & gave me a pleading look that told me to carry on, so I tightened my grip, causing her pace to quicken. I groaned at the sight of her perfect, wet pussy sliding up & down my cock, bringing me closer to my release.

Keeping my grip on her throat, I rolled over so Beth was beneath me, softening my grip momentarily for her to take a sudden gasp of air. I grinned at her as she let a moan escape before my grip tightened once again.

“I’ve wanted you beneath me for so fucking long, Angel. Now, you have my permission to cum.” I smirked as I began thrusting hard & fast, bouncing my hips against hers as Beth wrapped her legs around my waist & dragged her nails down my back. I let out a low growl at the pain, squeezing tighter on her neck, leaving more purple bruises as evidence that she was mine.

I watched as her beautiful, innocent face got twisted up with sin & I let go of her just in time to hear the sound of her orgasm come crashing out of her glossy, angelic lips. Her forehead was glistening with a light film of sweat as her eyebrows furrowed & her lips parted ever so slightly. Her eyes stayed fixed on mine as I felt her cum around my cock.

I smirked as I watched her, knowing I’d caused that sinful look in her eyes, just like I’d always wanted.

I felt my own release build up as I watched Beth squirm & writhe from her own, not breaking pace or easing for a second, dragging out her orgasm.

“Tell me who you belong to.” I demanded, edging closer, groaning as the sight of Beth cumming beneath me.

“You. I-I belong to you.” She choked out between gasps & moans. “Cum for me Nikki, please.” She begged desperately.

Beths words tipped me over the edge & I buried my face in her neck as came, slowing down my pace before collapsing in a pile on the bed next to her.

“Fuck.” I whispered, letting out a low, sultry laugh.

*Beths POV*

“Yep.” I agreed, giggling. Fuck was the only word that seemed appropriate right now. My whole body felt like it was vibrating, still throbbing from my orgasm. I wriggled up next to Nikki, resting my head on his shoulder, resigning myself to the knowledge that my legs were basically useless at this point & I’d just have to call in sick again for my evening shift.

Nikki whole body stiffened at my touch before relaxing fractionally, long enough to wrap his arm around my waist, but I could sense his discomfort.

“You.. ok, Sixx?” I asked, dragging the question out a little as I propped myself up to look at him.

“Yeah, yeah, fine.” He shifted, his eyes refusing to meet mine.

I felt a knot form in my stomach as the awkwardness grew in the air. “I wasn’t that bad, was I?” I joked, half-serious.

“No, it not that doll. That was, uh, well, that was fucking phenomenal.” He laughed nervously, running his hands through his hair.

“So.. What is it?” I questioned, feeling suddenly self-conscious as I pulled the bed cover over me to hide my body.

His eyes drifted down to his arm around my waist. “I’m just, um, I’m don’t really do the whole cuddling thing after, yanno?”

I scoffed at him, shaking my head. “Christ Nikki.”

“I’m sorry!” He said, immediately jumping to his own defensive. “You know I’m not that kinda guy!”

“Nik, I put my goddamn head on your shoulder, I wasn’t asking you to commit!”

“Look, the whole thing just makes me, I don’t know, uncomfortable I guess!” He blurted out sheepishly.

I let out a short, unamused laugh. “And kicking someone out of my bed before they’ve had chance to catch their breath makes me uncomfortable, so looks like we’re both fucked here.” I snapped.

“Lizzy, c’mon, you knew what this was, you’ve always known!” Nikki looked exasperated. “You’ve seen it happen with plenty of other girls, nothing has changed.” He said sharply, climbing out of my bed & pulling on his pants.

They shouldn’t have, but his words stung.

Fuck.

“Christ Sixx. I didn’t think I was special, but I thought after everything that maybe you cared about me a little more than all your other groupies.” I spat, tears involuntarily springing to my eyes. I furiously tried to blink them away.

“I - I care about you Beth, but no. This was what it was, you should’ve known.” He shook his head, still refusing to catch my eye as he gathered up his clothes & got dressed.

I shook my head, letting an ironic laugh escape me. “Who’d have thought Vince would’ve treated me better than you. And to think I fucking hurt him for this.” I gestured towards Nikki & the bed, shaking my head pitifully. “Thanks a lot Nikki.”

His head spun to face me, his eyes finally meeting mine. “Don’t fucking blame me for what happened with you two. No-one forced you to go off with me! You made that decision on your own Princess.”

“I went off with you because I thought I was going off with more than just one mediocre fuck!” I yelled bitterly. “What happened to wanting to be the only one that has me? What happened to ‘tell me who you belong to’ just 10 fucking minutes ago?!”

“Shit Lizzy, I say shit when I’m fucking horny. What did you expect? I was just gonna settle down with you because I’ve been chasing you? That’s the whole goddamn point, its the thrill of the chase &, well..”

Tears pricked in my eyes once again & I didn’t bother to hide them this time.

“Just get out Sixx.” I ordered, bluntly.

“Princess, look, I like you, I do, but I don’t want anything more than this, I figured you knew that. I’m sorry if I confused you, I like what we had gong before, can we just go back to that?” Nikki asked softly, reaching for my hand.

“Get out of here Nikki, now!” I yelled, hot, humilIted years spilling down my cheeks as I climbed out of bed & strode towards Nikki, pushing him out of the door & slamming it shut behind him. I sunk to the floor, my bare back against the cold wood of the door as I listened to Nikki sigh heavily on the other side, before walking down the hallway, opening the front door & closing it behind him.

I listened as the latch caught once again. I sure as hell wasn’t gonna chase him this time.

126 notes · View notes

descendantofthesparrow · 6 years ago

Text

Anger issues- Harry Hook x Daughter of the queen of hearts! Reader

warning: swearing, and abuse, mental and physical

Anger issues- Harry Hook x Daughter of the queen of hearts! Reader

outfit and accessories

Could I request an imagine for Harry Hook? Where he is dating the daughter of the queen of hearts, who is a lot like her mother: temperamental, easy and explosive anger, likes to yell for heads 5o be off when she gets mad. She doesn't like being told what to do by Uma and Uma doesn't really like that. But she still belongs to Uma's crew because she doesn't like Mal's crew because they used to be her friends but left her. Sorry if it's long

here ya go!

request from cerealkiller1975 you told me to go crazy and i did

-isle of the lost-

you grit your teeth as you stomped off the docks, grumbling to yourself,

“damn Uma, telling me what to do, who does she think she is”

You snatched an orange from a stand and growled at the merchant when he protested, and he whimpered and slunk back behind his stand. you rolled your eyes and made your way to your mother's hair salon, along the way remembering what had happened

“damn harry, I’m his girlfriend, why does he always defend her.”

‘well’ you thought angerly ‘maybe ex-girlfriend now’

-flashback-

you sat at the long table where the crew sat and grabbed a fry from Harry's tray and threw it in your mouth, sticking your tongue out at him when he glared at you, you rolled eyes and grabbed another, Harry rolled his eyes, pushed the tray between you two, and scooted closer.

“(y/n)!” you groaned and slammed your face into your arms on the table, Harry frowned at her and raised an eyebrow before turning back to his food.

“(y/n)!” Uma pulled at (y/n)’s jacket and pulled you up to look at your face, “are you listening to me!?”

you glared at her “not really”

Uma growled at you and said “well you are now, I need you to do something for me” you hummed and placed a finger on your chin before letting out a chirpy “how bout no~”

Uma’s eyes darkened “what.”

you turned and smirked at her, “I said: how. Bout. No.”

Uma snarled

“I am your captain you will do as I command!”

“and I said no!”

As you both were bickering Harry tensed his muscles and whirled around

“(y/n)!!! do as she says!!!”

You spun around to see Harry glaring at you, staring at you with a look you’ve never seen before.

“why?!”

“because she’s you’re captain!”

“why does that matter?!”

“because she let ye on the crew! Ye wanted on now ye gotta take orders from her!”

“I only joined because Mal wasn’t around anymore!”

“yea I know that!! And then ye came here!!! Ye agreed to join and serve under Uma!!! And we all follow Uma without question!!! WHY ARE YE SO UNWILLING TO TAKE ORDERS YE SEEMED FINE TAKING THEM FROM MAL”

You snarled at him

“don’t you ever mention that ever again!! And wow it sounds like you’re in love with her! Are you forgetting I’m your girlfriend?!”

“WHY DOES THAT MATTER!?”

You blinked, not expecting that response

“UMA WOULD BE A MUCH BETTER GIRLFRIEND THAN YE AT LEAST SHE WOULDN’T FIGHT WITH EVERYONE SHE SEES, AND SHE WOULDN’T TRY TO ARGUE WITH ME EVERY FIVE SECONDS AND SHE WOULDN’T BE AS ANNOYING AND STOP BUGGING ME!”

You stared at Harry for a few seconds, giving him a firm stare that rivaled Mals, and you saw the wheels turn in his head, soon realizing what he said”

“(y/n) luve I din-“

“well hook you’ve made your point so why don’t you just forget me and go for Uma, you seem to care about her more than you do me, even though I was the one you told all your secrets to, showed all your bruises to, and all the things that your dad did to you, but okay that’s fine if you want Uma that’s fine, but don’t come crawling back to me when you realize that you lost someone that would never reveal anything about you that would hurt you.”

You pulled on the hook necklace, hearing it snap and threw it Harry's feet, along with the hook bracelet and tossed it to Uma

“here you might need these”

You turned and collected your sword, hearing Harry begin to speak

“wait (y/n!)-“

“listen hook if I ever see you again just know it's OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!”

You threw open the shop doors and bolted, running towards your home.

--flashback end (yeah I know its kinda long)—

You slowed down your stomping speed walk to a slower smoother walk, you sighed and made your way into your mother's salon, and as soon as you walked in you felt a sharp pain in your face

“gnn!”

You stumbled back, hitting the door with your back and held your cheek

“where were you young lady!?”

Your mother screeched, you licked your lips and stared off to the side,

“…”

“WELL?!”

“I was at the chip shop” you answered Weakley

“WITH THE DUMB DAUGHTER OF THE SEA WITCH SHRIMPY?! YOU ARE A PRINCESS YOU ARE MENT TO GIVE ORDERS NOT TAKE THEM!?”

“I wasn’t taking them,” you told her meekly

“I DON’T CARE. YOU NEED YOUR OWN CREW TO PUSH AROUND NOT SOME TINY GIRL WHO DOSNT BELONG”

“but you were fine with me being in Mals crew”

You weakly pointed out

“YES, I KNOW, SHES THE DAUGHTER OF MALEFICENT, IF I SHOWED THAT I DIDN’T LIKE THAT MALEFICENT WOULD HAVE SKINNED ME!!

NOW YOU ARE A LEADER!!! A PRINCESS, START ACTING LIKE IT!”

She surged her arm forward and slugged you in the stomach, your knees went weak and you collapsed on the floor

“NO DAUGHTER OF MINE WILL BE TAKING ORDERS FROM A DIRTY PIRATE LIKE SHRIMPY, AND HOOKS SON, HE IS NOT WORTHY OF YOU, SO YOU NEED TO DROP HIM! AND TO GET THAT THROUGH YOUR HEAD YOU WILL BE PUNISHED!”

“mom-“

“QUIET YOU FUCKING DISGRACE!”

“gahHHH!”

-------

You laid on the floor of the salon crying quietly, your body throbbing in pain, your mother walked away

“now pick yourself up, I don’t need a disappointing order taking bitch on my floor”

“yes mother” you croaked quietly, you slowly got up from the floor using a chair as a crutch, you groaned clutching your side.

You made your way upstairs, remembering your mother's words

‘my daughter will never take orders from anyone, you will only give orders understood!’

‘princesses give orders, they do not take them!”

You sniffed and wiped your face before your mind flashed back to when Mal ruled the Isle

‘listen (y/n) I don’t care who your mom is, who you are, or what you supposed status is supposed to be, I give orders, you follow them understood?!’

‘remember your place (y/n), I’m the daughter of the ruler of darkness, you’re the daughter of a simple queen of a card symbol’

You shoved open the door to your room and closed it with your foot and made your way to your bathroom rummaging around for your first aid kit.

Finding it you made your way to your bed and sat down, removing your clothes and reaching for the bandages and trying to wrap them around your torso, hissing when you tried to turn to reach your back

“need help with that lass?”

A shy Scottish voice came from the doorway

You whirled around to see a meek Harry standing just outside the doorway as if scared to come in.

You stared at him for a few moments before snapping

“what are you doing here?”

Harry swallowed harshly “I-I’m here to apologize to ye”

“why? you said it yourself, you'd rather have Uma over me”

Harry winced and bit his lip “I-I didn mean it, I-I just got mad because Uma has been my longest friend, and I just got protective” he stated weakly

You pursed your lips “yeah I know that and I get it, we all have someone were protective of, but that doesn’t give you the right to say what you did”

Harry's eyes started to fill with tears, a rare occurrence for him

“aye, I know and I’ll never do it again, I swear it lass,” His voice cracked “I never wanted to hurt you’

He crossed the threshold and kneeled down at your feet, and took your hands in his

“aye swear on calypso, that I’ll never ever hurt ye ever again,” the sound of thunder roared through the sky, and your eyes widened in shock, Harry just swore on Calypso! Only ones who truly mean to keep their promise do that, and if they break it means death “ and Im sorry about the Mal thing, I shouldn’t have mentioned that.”

You stared down at him, a battle with your heart and brain.

As you and Harry stared at each other, one begging for forgiveness, another with uncertainty.

All of a sudden your eyes began to burn, and your vision fuzzed, tears starting to run down your bruised face.

Harry looked at you in shock before gently wrapping his arms around you, mindful of your injuries.

“luve!? What's wrong”

You let out a few sobs before burying your face in his neck

“(y/n)? lass? Please tell me what's wrong.”

Harry ran his hand through your hair and gently rubbed your back

“i-I” your voice cracked “I forgive you, you giant jerk”

Relief ran through Harry's body and he picked you up and sat on your bed and settled you on his lap.

“Shh, shh I've got you luve, I've got you”

*sob* “ng”

Harry stared in front of him in thought for a few moments before deciding something that would change your life.

“(y/n) im going to bandage you up and then your moving in with me, okay?”

You stiffened for a few moments before withdrawing your self from his neck

“but Harry what about my mother?”

“I'll take care of her Lassie, don’t worry.”

You nodded and let Harry stand up and he grabbed the bandages, turned back to you, before stopping in front of you

“I almost forgot”

Harry reached into his pocket and withdrew it to reveal the hook necklace and bracelet.

“oh…right”

“I understand lass, you had every right to do that,…but can I put them back on”

“…sure”

Harry smiled softly and clipped the necklace around your neck, and then clipped the bracelet on your wrist. He wrapped his arms around you, you returning the gesture and pressing your face in his neck.

You both sat in silence for a few minutes listening to each others breathing before Harry broke the silence

“I love you (y/n)”

Your breath stopped and your heart went crazy

*bu bump bu bump bubump bubump bubump bubump bubump*

You swallowed harshly before replying

“I-I love you too harry”

Harry sighed in relief and held you closer, vowing to himself that he'll never let you go.

--the end~ <3--

hoped you liked it! thanks for reading!

#harry hook #harryhook #Descendents #disney descendants #descendants #uma descendants #uma daughter of ursula #harry hook x reader #harry hook descendants #harry hook imagine #descendants 2 #Isle of the Lost

382 notes · View notes

eliottdemaurys · 6 years ago

Text

mercredi 10:40 - phase de latence clip analysis

Since I had so many thoughts about mercredi 10:40, I decided to make this analysis of the clip. Buckle up mecs, its gonna be a long ride. I’m putting this under the cut because this ended up being way longer than I originally planned

So we start in the biology classroom where it looks like the class is working on an assignment where you can’t talk to the other students. It might be a test though (if french people could rb this and explain it that would be very much appreciated.) Imane seems like someone who cares a lot about academic honesty, but she cares even more about being a loyal friend. That’s why I was shocked, but not entirely surprised when she whispered an answer to Lucas for his assignment.

“You forgot the latency phase”

“What?”

“The latency phase. When two chromosomes are forming”

Imane is someone who is reserved, but once she gets to know and trust someone, she will go above her personal beliefs. The same can go for when she defended Alexia during the Kiffance party when Chloé said a generalization about gay people. Homosexuality is against Imane’s religion, but that doesn’t stop her from defending Alexia. Imane is such a caring hufflepuff and anyone would be lucky to have a friend like her.

Lucas gets the texts from Eliott

When Lucas got the texts from Eliott, he seemed apprehensive, but he was still willing to turn his uncompleted assignment in to see him. Lucas was confused and probably hurt that Eliott didn’t text him since Saturday, but I truly believe that all it takes is for Lucas to see Eliott’s face for 2 seconds to stop being mad at him.

Eliott also brings out the spontaneous side in Lucas, whether it means leaving class early or ditching Chloé and Lucille on their “double date.” Eliott makes Lucas fearless. (I’ll come back to that later.)

“Minimalism, Imane. Minimalism.”

This quote makes me laugh every time. Lucas has a very witty personality that we see from time to time when he’s truly happy. Imane’s reaction to this made it even better.

This smile!!!! I wish I could see Eliott smile like that forever!!!! Okay but seriously, Eliott was so happy at that moment before it all went to hell. He probably had a hard couple of days after he left Lucas’s apartment, but now that he seemed to be feeling better he couldn’t wait to see Lucas. There is so much hope and love in those eyes.

This kiss was such a natural reaction for Eliott, but I don’t think he understood how monumental it would be to kiss Lucas at school. Lucas never told Eliott that he is closeted but after Eliott saw Lucas’s reaction, I’m sure he definitely knows now. This, my mecs, is the first part of this clip that hurts. And it gets worse.

“Doesn’t that make you happy?”

“Of course. I just don’t want you to be sad or feel like it’s my fault”

So much to unpack with these lines. “Doesn’t that make you happy?” Oh Eliott, of course it makes Lucas happy. Lucas’ reaction caused the doubt to start creeping in for a second, and I don’t blame him. I’m sure breaking up with Lucille was a terrifying moment for him. He lost his main safety net and jumped into this new and exciting relationship where there is still a chance of abandonment. Thankfully, Eliott’s doubt only lasted for a second when Lucas said “I don’t want you to be sad or to feel like it’s my fault.” Not only does Lucas want to be with him, but he cares so much about how Eliott feels. Lucas understood that Lucille was a big part of Eliott’s life, and he can’t help but feel guilty for breaking up their long term relationship.

“I'm not sad!”

Eliott is so happy here. Right away Lucas expressed genuine concern for Eliott’s feelings probably in a way Lucille never did. He also assured Eliott about how happy their relationship makes him. Lucas just wanted to be sure that Eliott feels the same way, especially after not hearing from him for days.

This time it was Eliott’s turn to reassure Lucas. This forehead touch expressed more than words ever could in this situation. The true intimacy in this moment is so tangible. Not to mention the little nose rub thing Eliott always does with Lucas! They’re just so soft with each other I feel like my heart is going to melt.

Now for some more angst.

“My mother is crazy” “I don’t need crazy people in my life”

It physically pains my heart to type those words, let alone hear it being said from Lucas multiple times as a rewatch this clip. I’m sure once Lucas realizes that what he said was wrong he’ll spend his whole life proving to Eliott how wrong that statement is.

This moment right here is the part where I start crying every time. Eliott is always so expressive through his eyes, and you can so clearly see the pain. His biggest fear about Lucas came true: he realized that Lucas won’t accept him for his mental illness. Of course this isn’t true, but after Lucas calls his mom with a mental illness crazy, there’s no reason for him to believe otherwise. Eliott decides at that moment to build a wall around himself, and that prompts him to make this insta post. The worst thing about this is that Lucas doesn’t know why Eliott starts to withdraw.

Lucas becomes so brave around Eliott. Only two minutes before Lucas was scared to kiss Eliott in school, but in a matter of minutes, he was ready to kiss him without a second thought. Lucas was also so sure about telling his parents about Eliott. I’m so proud of him.

Maybe that’s what makes Eliott’s rejection of the kiss even more painful. Lucas was so open around Eliott, so i’m sure Eliott walking away was a punch to the gut. The confusion Lucas must have felt was probably overwhelming.

What happens next?

Now Lucas has two choices: he can do what he has done before and shut down within himself, or he could open up to someone about this. I hope that he goes to Manon for help because she has always made it clear that he shouldn’t have to go through his struggles alone. It would also be nice for him to talk to Mika or Alexia, since they both seem to be very confident in their sexualities.

Please tell me if you would like me to write more clip analyses like these! I genuinely loved writing this even though I had to rewatch an incredibly painful clip over and over again.

I’m sure there’s so much I missed, so if you have any other thoughts on this clip please feel free to share!

#skam france #elu #lucas lallement #eliott demaury #skamfr analysis #my post

30 notes · View notes

our-smooty · 6 years ago

Text

Take Me to Church - Chapter 22: Expectations

Fandom: Gorillaz

Rating: Explicit

Relationships: 2doc

Tags: Car Accidents Angst Hurt/Comfort Drugs/Alcohol Implied/Referenced Suicide SuicideHealing Everything Hurts

Summary: The band is back together, but things are… weird to say the least. But when a crisis arises, can they pull it all together and be a family again?

Link to other Chapters on my Blog!

1 Week Later - The First Session - Murdoc

“So uh, yeah. Guess that’s about it.”

The therapist in front of him was still writing. She’d been diligently taking notes through his entire abridged personal history, jotting down each and every high and low point. So far therapy was nothing like he thought it would be.

“OK… so you said you’ve had mental health treatment before?” she asked after a moment. Murdoc nodded.

“The other times were all in prison though, if that makes any difference, luv,” he answered. She looked up at him and smiled. He resisted the urge to look away.

“I assure you, Murdoc, that you’ll find my methods to be significantly different from those in most correctional facilities,” she told him. He tried not to look too relieved. “I’d like to begin by asking you what you want to get out of therapy.”

He paused. What did she want him to say? “I assume you heard all that from 2D already.”

“But I’d like to hear what you want Murdoc, not what Stuart wants,” she shot back with a grin. Murdoc laughed dryly. Where had 2D found this one, then?

“What I want is a bottle of--” His therapist shot him a withering look, and he sobered up. “Fine. I uh, I jus’ want to be… Less of a prick?”

He watched her write down “less of a prick” with a sort of cognitive dissonance. “Anything else?”

“I’ve got--” his voice was shaky and quick like if he didn’t hurry and spit the words out he’d never do it. “I’ve got stuff, in my head. I-I’d like to get a handle on that.”

“What kind of stuff, Murdoc?” she asked, still writing. Fucking hell this therapy thing was going to be harder than he thought, wasn’t it?

“Sometimes I do things, and I don’t really know why. O-or I’ll be feelin’ a certain way for no reason.”

“And you’d like to understand that?” she finished for him. Murdoc nodded again, not making eye contact. His nails found purchase in the soft material of the armchair while his knees bounced. The room felt warm and his skin felt too tight. “Alright. Those are both great goals, and they’ll help me tailor your treatment appropriately.”

He grunted in response. The room was quiet again before she put down her pen and faced him directly. “I want you to know, Murdoc, that it’s very brave of you to seek therapy for your problems.”

He scoffed. “Only took a few decades.”

“What matters is you’re here now, and we can begin to work on things together.” She handed him a booklet from her desk. “I want you to take this, and read it over before our next meeting.”

The booklet was thin, with a cover full of smiling people. The title read, “PTSD: Signs and Treatment.” Murdoc swallowed hard.

“I also want to go over a few grounding techniques with you today, before our session ends. Does that sound alright?” He was still staring down at the booklet, hands trembling slightly. With great difficulty, he nodded and sat up straighter. He could this, he had to.

Thirty minutes and a great deal of deep breathing later, Murdoc was walking out of the office. He paid the lady at the desk and set up another appointment for a week later at his therapist's suggestion. Every movement he made felt far away and floaty. Kind of like being drunk without the warm sense of security.

His daze was broken when he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. Suddenly he realized he was outside the doctor's office building, smoking a cigarette he had no memory of lighting. Checking the text, he was unsurprised to see it was 2D.

im in the car outside

text me when ur done

I got coffee

Murdoc knew 2D was nervous about the first session. He’d already seen their therapist last week, but this was the first time Murdoc had gone. After a few sessions alone, they’d agreed to have one together, the cycle repeating indefinitely. Or until they didn’t need to see the therapist anymore, though Murdoc wasn’t hopeful that’d be any time soon.

Honestly, the bassist had wanted to drive himself to the appointment. It’d give him time to himself to process the session figure out how he felt about everything they talked about. But Stuart had insisted on driving Murdoc there and picking him up like a chauffeur. He was probably afraid Murdoc would flake out and just not show up.

I’m done.

He sent the text to 2D and took a seat on the curb. Lighting another fag and taking a deep, calming drag, Murdoc tried to center himself. He hadn’t had to go over all (or most, at least) of the nitty-gritty details of his life in a long time, maybe ever. It set him on edge, knowing the things he told an almost complete stranger, willingly.

By the time he finished his smoke, 2D was pulling into the parking lot. It didn’t take very long and Murdoc had the sneaking suspicion that the singer hadn’t even gone all the way home. He didn’t feel like making a scene though. To be honest, he was mostly just tired. When Stu stopped in front of him he quickly got in, sinking down in the seat with a sigh.

“Alright?” Stu asked, pulling out of the parking lot. “Your coffee’s in front.”

Murdoc grabbed his drink with a thankful nod. “Thanks.”

The car was quiet for a moment before 2D spoke again. “So, how did it go?”

“Fine.” Murdoc really, really didn’t feel up to talking about his session now. Not even the coffee could hold off the exhaustion that was slowly settling over him.

Again, there was a pause. 2D’s fingers tapped against the steering wheel in nervous patterns. Murdoc tried to ignore it.

“Are you sure?” Satan, the singer wasn’t going to give up, was he? Murdoc sighed, realizing he wasn’t being fair to the younger man. 2D was a worrier, it was one of the things that made him so charming.

“It was fine, D. I’m just… tired now,” he answered. Stu visibly relaxed and shot Murdoc an understanding smile. It didn’t make Murdoc feel sick, so he took that as a sign the therapy was working.

“I get it, Muds. Why don’t you take a nap and I’ll wake you up when we get home?” The relief he felt was definitely a little embarrassing, but he was too worn out to care. Instead and turned on his side towards the window and shut his eyes. In the background, he could hear the soft sounds of the radio show 2D had on, and the rumbling of the tired against the tarmac. It wasn’t ideal for sleeping, but for once exhaustion was working in his favour, and he quickly nodded off against the stained seat.

2D drove them home with no problem. He’d worked as a driving instructor after all. At the very least his track record was better than Murdoc’s, and he was glad the bassist hadn’t insisted on driving them.

His eyes briefly glanced over to his sleeping partner. Murdoc had looked so drained when he first got in the car that Stu had been worried. But his therapist had asked him to work on avoiding quizzing the bassist on his every move. He knew that it wasn’t helpful and that half the time Murdoc didn’t know why he did what he did, but he was just so scared the older man would do something stupid, or get hurt, or--

He clenched his fingers around the steering wheel. That was another thing he needed to get a handle on. Because of his less than stellar past experiences with Murdoc, he tended to disasterize everything he was involved in. It was hard to stop himself, but if he was going to date the bassist, he had to try.

They pulled into the driveway of Wobble Street around 10 minutes later. 2D was feeling a lot calmer, the simple task of driving along familiar roads helped to wind down his brain. Murdoc was still sleeping, hunched up and drooling a little. Honestly, if it wasn’t freezing outside, he would have left Murdoc to sleep. But he didn’t want his boyfriend to freeze, so he carefully reached over and brushed his fingers through the other’s hair.

“We’re here, love,” he murmured, running the tips of his fingers down the angle of Murdoc’s cheek and jaw. The bassist scrunched his nose in irritation but still leaned into the touch. “Come’on, let’s get inside before my fuckin’ knob freezes off.”

Murdoc chuckled a little at that. “Don’t be crass.”

“Mmm I’ll show you crass later if you’re lucky,” 2D teased, getting out of the car himself and unlocking the front door. Murdoc was close behind.

“Hurry up, Stu. I need a drink,” the bassist griped. When they got inside he headed straight for the kitchen and the liquor cabinet. Stu wanted to be mad, but he knew Murdoc was struggling to cope the only way he knew how. Not that the singer could judge him, he’d finally been confronted with the reality of his pain-pill addiction when he ran out last week. With everything going on he’d allowed all his prescriptions to lapse. Luckily Murdoc was still able to write prescriptions with his degree and get the singer some before he went into withdrawal.

“Don’t spoil your dinner, Muds. Russel said he was going to make that mac and cheese recipe he found the other day.”

Murdoc ignored him, instead pulling out a bottle of dark liquor and a cup. To Stu’s surprise, he poured himself a glass and set the bottle back on the shelf. He raised his glass to 2D and took a sip, eyes falling shut.

“Ahh, that’s the stuff. Good year, this is.” He swirled it around in the glass, focusing on the light glinting off the alcohol. “Did you have any plans for the rest of the day?”

It was hard not to smile at his obviousness. “No, I don’t have any plans.” 2D watched as Murdoc slowly looked up to meet his eyes, a nearly invisible smile on his lips.

“D’you want to uh, watch TV, or somthin’?”

The Second Session - Murdoc

“... I don’t know why I did it.”

His therapist--he knew her name, but he felt weird using it--waited for him to continue. “I didn’t buy the place with the intention of everythin’ going so wrong.”

“Then why did you buy Plastic Beach, Murdoc?”

The Satanist thought back through the haze of alcohol and mental instability. “Well, it was the furthest place on Earth from anywhere else. Figured I could get some peace and quiet, after the uh, incident with Noodle.”

She jotted a few things down, going over the thing’s he’d told her before. “But you made yourself a companion, and you brought Stuart there.”

“The Cyborg doesn’t count. It couldn’t even talk, really. And I don’t rightly know how 2D got there,” he admitted. “Maybe it was me who kidnapped him, maybe it wasn’t. If I did, I don’t know how or why.”

“How long did you spend alone on the island?” Murdoc had a feeling she was leading him somewhere.

“6 months,” he answered quietly. They’d been 6 of the worst month of his life. At first, he’d been fine on his own, hosting his radio show, sprucing up the island. But slowly, surely, the guilt over El Manyana had eaten away at his mind until there was nearly nothing left.

“That’s a very long time to be alone, Murdoc. It must have been hard.”

He was getting worked up. There was tension in his shoulder and a sort of tingling in his fingers that meant he was holding on to the arms of the chair too tightly. Small things he wouldn’t have noticed before his therapist started pointing them out. Knowing the signs made it easier for him to head off his panic and calm down.

“It was,” he said after a deep breath. “It was jus’ me and my thoughts. I think I went a little mad, to be honest.”

“You had been through a traumatic experience and were experiencing the symptoms of PTSD, Murdoc. Those things were out of your control.” Except they weren’t. He’d caused the whole El Manyana thing without a doubt. His signature was on all the preplanning paperwork for the shoot.

“It was me who put her on that blasted flying island. It was me who put her in danger in the first place.”

“Have you ever asked Noodle how she feels about it?” Murdoc thought back. There hadn’t really been any time after the raid on Plastic Beach, and then they’d split up again. When they all got together at Wobble Street he’d started isolating himself in his room and avoided talking to anyone.

“No. Probably never really apologized either.” She nodded and waited again. Murdoc knew she wanted him to say more.

“You could go visit her. 2D said that he and Russel go quite often.” She already knew he hadn’t been going to visit Noodle, and what had happened the last time he’d tried.

“You know why I can’t.”

Their session was nearly over, and unease was starting to set in. Every week at the end she’d give him something to work on, and report back with the next week. The first time, it had been breathing, the second had been letting 2D know how he was feeling. He had an idea of what this week's might be.

“Why don’t you try writing her a note, and having one of the other’s delivering it to her. I know Stuart said she’s recovered enough to be interacting with her cellphone again,” she suggested. Instantly he paled and began to sweat.

“I-I don’t know what I’d say…” he stuttered. His therapist nodded as if she’d expected his response.

“You don’t have to start off with the big stuff. Why not tell her about your day, or what you want to do when she comes home?”

It sounded impossibly terrifying. But he’d try. Maybe Stu could help him write it up, the idiot was always good with writing sappy shite.

“Fine. I’ll g-give it a go. No promises though,” he added as an afterthought. She smiled knowingly.

“Trying is all I ask Murdoc. It looks like our time is up, however. I’ll see you next week then.”

He left the session feeling strange. In some ways, he was hopeful that he might be able to repair his relationship with Noodle and begin to process of getting better--whatever that meant. But in other ways, he was nearly paralyzed with the fear that that was impossible. Murdoc could feel himself begin to shake as he left the office. Not even the cool air could snap him out of it.

Come get me

All he could think about was getting somewhere safe where he could break down in private. With shaky hands he lit a smoke and practically inhaled it. In just a few moments it was down to the filter and he pulled it from his lips, watching the cherry die. In a split second action, he ground the ember against his other wrist. The burning centred him.

“Murdoc!” The twangy voice of his singer startled him out of his daze. Murdoc immediately dropped the butt and tamped it out. 2D was smiling at him from the driver's side and Murdoc was infinitely grateful that the singer hadn’t seen what he’d just done. Pulling his sleeve over burn he stalked over to the passenger side and got in.

“You’re shakin’ Muds,” the other said. 2D put the car in park and pulled the handbrake, twisting to face the bassist. Murdoc clenched his teeth to prevent himself from snapping at the singer to just drive. “D’you wanna talk about it?”

If he started talking about it he knew he’d start crying. And he really didn’t feel like crying in a parking lot in the middle of London. “Can we jus'... go home?”

2D shrugged. Murdoc focused on the way the seat felt against his back and how the heated air pumping from the dash was drying out his skin. It was hard to pull himself into the moment, to keep centred in the here and now instead of wallowing in the past. Memories of all the shitty things he had to make up for were piling up against his internal dam, nearly breaking through. Just as he felt himself slipping under the surface, 2D reached out and put his hand on Murdoc’s knee.

“We’ll be home soon,” he said with a reassuring smile. Murdoc covered the hand with his own and squeezed. He was here, he was with 2D, he was trying.

He was trying.

The Third Session - Murdoc

“--and I don’t bloody know what he expects! I told him! I told him to give me time and he--”

Murdoc was ranting as he paced back and forth in front of his therapist. He was completely incensed, beyond reason with anger and frustration. He did everything he was supposed to! The letter to Noodle took him hours to write--and tens of different version to get right--and that wasn’t even the worst part. The worst part was that he had to give it to 2D to give to Noodle, then wait for a reply. The entire process had been nearly too much for the bassist, but he’d done it.

And that sodding idiot Stuart had the nerve to tell him he wasn’t trying hard enough. That he wasn’t making progress.

“I-I though’ I was doin’ everythin’ he wanted me to!” he shouted, grabbing his hair and tugging as he paced. His therapist had been quiet from the moment he stepped into the office, letting him scream and vent as much as he needed to. She knew he’d run out of steam eventually, Murdoc’s anger was shallow but fierce when I came to his partner.

“Murdoc, could you try some of those breathing exercises we’ve been practising?” she asked gently. Until she pointed it out he hadn’t realized that he was wheezing, his chest tight with stress. Focusing on the rise and fall of his chest, Murdoc took a deep breath in through his mouth, then exhaled.

“Thank you. Now, could you tell me what exactly, 2D said that made you feel like his?”

Murdoc was still angry, his fists clenched tight enough that his nails were biting into his palm. He took a few more seconds, then sat in the chair opposite. “He’s been at me all week. ‘Oh Murdoc, yer drinkin’ too much!’, and ‘oi Muds, yew neva’ tell me how yer doin’!’,” he said, doing an impression of 2D.

“But I have been tellin’ him how I’m feelin’!” he continued. By now he was curled forward on the edge of his chair, fingers knitted behind his neck.

“Did you tell him that you felt that way?” she asked. Somehow it always felt like she was one step ahead of him, leading him to his own conclusions.

“I tried, at first. I don’t think he believed me when I said I was ‘fine’. But I really was!” He really had been doing alright a few times this week. But every time he answered that way, 2D would frown a little, like he thought the bassist was lying.

“And I’ll admit,” he said slowly, “I have been drinkin’ about the same as I always have. But I wasn’t passed out in the livin’ room or nothin’. But there he was every time I took a drink, frownin’ and grumblin’.”

“Thank you for being honest about your alcohol consumption, Murdoc,” his therapist said as he caught his breath again. Every time he got going the anger and anxiety would ramp up again, strangling him. “Can you explain how 2D’s actions made you feel?”

A brief pause. “He made me feel… I felt ignored. A-and like he was treatin’ me like I’m some fragile fuckin--gah!”

He jumped up to his feet again, restarting his journey from wall to wall. “I don’t soddin’ need his pity. Pity never got me anywhere, didn’t put food on the table or stop all those peop--” There were tears running down his face now, without his permission. He wiped them angrily. This wasn’t the first time he’d cried during a session, but it never got less humiliating.

“I am t-tryin’, I am,” he said, his voice choked. “He makes me f-feel like I’m n-not doin’ well enough. Like I’m never enough.”

“Can you focus on that?” she cut in. “Focus on where that feeling is coming from?”

He tried, he really did. But there wasn’t just one specific cause. There had never been a point in his life where he didn’t feel inadequate, didn’t feel like he wasn’t meeting expectations. Whose expectations? Murdoc had no idea. He overcompensated with a loud and abrasive personality to cover up the insecurities underneath. It was easy to see why, after years of struggling with these feelings, it’s been so easy for 2D’s concern to drive him to the breaking point.

And he knew 2D cared about him, he really did. He didn't think the poor sod had it in him to lie about something like that. But he was so scared that if he didn't meet 2D's expectations 100% of the time, the singer would realize what a waste of time being with someone like Murdoc was. Fuck, he realized, he'd done it again.

“I-I--” he stuttered, running a hand down his face. “Fuck. I-I have to apologize to Stu.”

“For what?”

Murdoc was already grabbing his coat and throwing it on. “I was blamin’ him for somethin’ that wasn’t all his fault, as usual.” He had a hand on the door when he turned back to his therapist, still sitting in her chair.

“Uh, same time next week?” he asked. She nodded with a slight smile and waved him out. Murdoc left the session feeling like he’d had some sort of breakthrough, though he couldn’t for the life of him figure out what it was.

#takemetochurchfic #2doc #niccalpot #tw self harm #tw DRUGS AND ALCOHOL

4 notes · View notes

ossseous · 6 years ago

Text

I wanna talk about my firing lets talk about my firing lmao where do i even start. i think i’ll start with when i started there, i was very involved with EVERYTHING and i was working very closely with the owner/boss. like that was the whole point of my job, was doing everything the owner/boss didn’t have the time to do.

his wife did not like this, i do not think. she is the one who interviewed me and hired me. but she was pretty cold to me from the get go, and I just brushed it off because i never really worked with her anyways because even though she was the office manager she was like NEVER actually at the office. fun fact, i actually thought one of my coworkers was the office manager until like a month ago, because she did all the office manager tasks lmao

i will not lie. i did not have any respect for her. she had her job there because she was the boss’s wife and she wanted a tight hold on the finances. she wasn’t good at her job. she wasn’t good at communicating with people. she was sexist. she was rude. she also got her cousin a job there, and said cousin ALSO did not ever actually do her job either. so, i just kind of thought of both of them as jokes lmao.

SO fast forward to my evaluation: they (im pretty sure it was SHE, because she does all the office hiring/job stuff) offered me a “promotion” to a different position. she said it was a position that they interviewed a lot for, but they never found anyone good enough. they thought i was good enough and had the “drive” for it.

i did not like this. because this said to me: the people who were good enough for that job, the people like me, didn’t bother even applying for it. there is a reason for that. because it was UNDER FUCKING PAID and the list of responsibilities WAS TWO PAGES LONG. the job listing was an actual screenshot of indeed.com webpage and at the top there was a fucking poP UP SAYING THAT THEY SHOULD TO RAISE THE BUDGET ON THE POSITION TO GET THE CANDIDATES THEY WANTED. what a joke.

after i thought about it, i went to the owner later, and I told him straight to his face what that job listing said to me, and I told him it was a little insulting and hurt my feelings because it felt disrespectful. he was like, okay, bring me a job listing and compensation you think is better for you and we will go over it. though he did at one point say me coming to him about it was “a little whiny” what the fuck ever, he said way ruder and unprofessional shit to everyone else on a daily basis so it was only a matter of time before he honed it in on me too.

i bring him the new job position and compensation, he approves both of them earlier this month. i set about starting my new responsibilities andddd

both the boss and his wife start just shutting me out of everything. no communication. not to mention the active sabotage--things like purposefully disrupting the project I was working on, implementing new shit related to my project without even giving me a heads up, not keeping me up to date on BIG fucking changes that affected my project.

also when i get my paycheck, i have been given the first raise that the boss’s wife offered me, not the higher raise the boss offered me. because she does the payroll shit.

lmao i WAS NOT going to let that shit stop me, so I started working with a manager and started focusing in on projects I could do to help him with until the shit with my main project settled and all the fucking changes were finished. he was the only person in management i could even stand at that point.

So cut to yesterday. I have to take an emergency call with my therapist due to my insurance fucking up my prescriptions and I wasn’t handling stress well AT ALL, on top of the actual withdrawal pain I was in. I tell the receptionist about the call, and tell her to let anyone who comes looking for me to know they will find me outside on the call since it’s private health stuff.

so I clock out and take the call out in my car and I at one point the boss’s wife comes out in the parking lot and is staring at me through my rear view mirror, but I figure she’s just waiting for her dog to pee. I finish the call, go back in, clock in, start back on my work and she comes in and fires me for leaving all the time without telling anyone so no one can ever find me. she’s smiling the whole fucking time

I’m flabbergasted??? because i ALWAYS TELL SOMEONE, which I TELL HER, and shes like, WELL, THEY ARENT YOUR SUPERVISOR.

excuse the fuck out of me, first of all when i started i was told one of my coworkers who wasn’t the boss’s wife was my direct supervisor, like sorry if it took you telling me at my fucking 90 day evaluation for me to learn she actually wasn’t. thats your own dumb ass fault. second of all, NO ONE ELSE HAS TO TELL HER when they leave. the protocol, that i was taught on my FIRST FUCKING DAY WAS: IF YOU NEED TO GO ON A BREAK JUST LET SOMEONE KNOW. i was even told it was less important for me because I didn’t have to work on the phone. so everyone else? they just tell the fuckign receptionist. hell, one woman even goes on a smoke break EVERY FUCKING HOUR and i REGULARLY can’t find her because she will be out there smoking in her car, yet ho ho ho she aint getting fired for it. third of all SHE DIDNT GIVE ME ONE SINGLE FUCKIGN WRITTEN NOTICE. if she had just FUCKING COME TO ME ABOUT IT and EXPLAINED WHAT WAS WRONG, I WOULD HAVE FIXED MY BEHAVIOR.

but that would involve the management actually communicating with their employees and outlining their expectations and they can’t do that for some reason. also, why give a fucking written warning when you are looking for a reason to fire that bitch your husband, and your BFF’s husband, and all the other men in the office are always mooning over and complimenting and checking out ? the bitch who wasn’t scared to call any of you out on your shitty behavior? that bitch that doesn’t have any respect for you because you haven’t done anything to earn it? that bitch who knew her worth and knew she was being taken advantage of and being underpaid ? that bitch that sat in on important meetings with your husband and had a deeper understanding of the company and it’s financial problems than you even did?

whatever, I know its for the best. i’m the fourth employee they have lost in the last two months. they can’t hiring anyone to replace them because they have a hiring process maintained by an idiot. everyone is scared they will get fired next, and after yesterday, when she fired the office golden child because she’s petty and jealous?? their employees are going to start jumping ship. so (shrug)

1 note · View note

teanaoverton · 6 years ago

Text

still swimming.

i thought the first year of law school was suppose to be the toughest. that was not the case for me.

this past semester, the first of my 2L year was the most trying experience of my life. and sheesh, i have dealt with a lot of experiences.

before we go any further, i think its important to tell you a little about myself and warn you of some contents that this post will contain.

i am brutally honest. i dont believe in sugar coating the truth, and so i wont. this post may be triggering to anyone who has every experienced sexual assault and/or sexual harassment. this post is my truth. and if you havent noticed by now, i do not like capital letters or formal punctuation. and i also cant spell.

anyway, back to the story.

the beginning of the semester started off rocky. i worked for my school and assisted with many task including orientation for the first year students and the title ix policy updates (thanks betsy *eyeroll*).

unfortunately, i had to use that title ix policy.

at the end of july, my key card to get in and out of my school’s parking deck was not working properly. i expressed my concern to a security officer. instead of walking to the gate, he walked with me to the parking deck and followed me to my car. we were the only two in the parking deck.

while at my car, he asked me on a date. i was not interested in the slightest. but hey, im a girl all alone in the parking deck with a security guard. i had just heard about a woman getting killed for rejecting a man. and i sure tf have no lived enough to die. so i told him that school was starting soon and i did not have time. smooth escape i thought. and i also thought that would be it, i was wrong.

the next week, i left the second floor (where i worked) to go downstairs and get a snack from the vending machines. he saw me and ran to try and pay for my snack, thoughtful gesture, but i refused as i did not want to lead him on. he then followed me to the elevators and handed me a note with his number on it.

i had to cross paths with him to get to work, and he would make comments to me. once in particular troubled me.“you dont work on wednesdays, we could go out on a wednesday.” and that is when a red flag went off for me.

why do you know my work schedule? ive already said i wasnt interest, why are you still actively pursing me? so i told my friend/co-worker about the interactions and asked her to walk me to my car.

while working late one evening, he came to the suite and started talking and staring. it was after hours and he was no longer on the clock. the other security officer on duty was probably home with his feet kicked up by this hour. instead of doing the same... he came to “see what was going on.” being aware of the situation and that i was uncomfortable, my friend engaged in the conversation so i didnt have to. bless her.

during orientation, we had leftover food. my boss at the time asked me to take some to the security officers. my friend and i locked eyes knowing i sure tf was not about to lead this man on by any means. so, that is when i told my boss at the time that i was good off doing that. if you know who my boss was, you know she will get the truth out of you.

one thing lead to another and boom, the incidents were reported to HR. who i was required to meet with. during the first week of classes, i met both HR and my boss to reassure them that i was not looking to get a black man fired, i just wanted to be left alone.

time went by, nothing happened. i still was uncomfortable passing the security desk. i would have friends walk with me to the car so i wouldnt be alone bc guess who did rounds in the parking deck, yeah. you guessed it, him.

unfortunately, my request was not fulfilled. he did not leave me alone. i was required to do a tabling event for work. guess where that tabling event was? right across from the security desk. gr8!!! he looked at me and loudly started saying "i shouldn't have to come to work and be uncomfortable.” he said this several times, causing others in the area to look and see what was going on.

again, the tabling event was for work (different job btw). i was sitting next to my boss who was unaware of the previous interactions. she too asked “why is he screaming like that?”

i sat there in shock. in silence. and on the clock, so i couldnt leave.

why. should. he. have. to. come. to. work. and. feel. uncomfortable.

that was it, my breaking point. i felt unsafe. i expressed my concerns to the appropriate parties. eventually time went on and he was transferred.

shortly after, repressed memories of my childhood rape surfaced during a therapy session. along with many thoughts: was i over exaggerating? did i lead him on in anyway? could i have done more to let him know i wasnt interested before reporting the incidents? was this my fault?

guilt.

i lost track of what was happening in real life because i was so distracted by the thoughts in my head. but as soon as i gained back some control, real life hit me again. my legal writing assignment had been posted. and guess what the topic was? sexual harassment in the work place.

you mean to tell me, i have to do research, write a brief, and have an oral argument about sexual harassment? shit, someone call my therapist.

i wrote some shit on some paper. and that was that. what was happening in my classes? no clue. what was happening in my life? no clue. what was going on in the world? no clue.

i got lost again.

i just wanted to float and let the current carry me for awhile. i wanted to watch the clouds chase each other into different corners of the sky like freed kites who never worry about the meaning of away. i wanted to float. ive been swimming so long.

but my thoughts eventually had an off switch and i was good again. then guess what?

kavanaugh.

here we fucking go again.

the student body president signed an aba petition to conduct an impartial hearing on kav. and for some reason, some students were pissed. so they took it upon themselves to write a petition to have the sba president remove his name from the aba petition and issue an apology.

i need you to pay very close attention for this part.

i sat in class triggered. surrounded by people signing this petition while tears poured down my face. how fucking disgusting are you people.

now the only reason i know what the petition actual was is because i am in sba. otherwise, i would have no clue it ever existed. want to know why? because the students who wrote the petition never asked me to sign it. trust me, i am not offended. in fact, im honored that they knew better than to bring some bullshit like that to me. but what was upsetting, when another student asked what was going on (why everyone was gathered looking at the petition), the authors of it said “we’re just looking at some stuff about aba accreditation.”

baby, if you gonna talk about it. be about it. smh.

the petition surfaced. and the names on it, wow. people i looked up to. people i considered role models. women who are allegedly advocates for women. women in general. even a few self-proclaimed feminist.

wow. the names.

so many people who have reached out to me when i told my story about being raped as a child. so many people i believed would be there for me if i asked for help dealing with the recent sexual harassment. so many frauds.

their names, they were on it. big and bold.

i didnt want to float anymore. i wanted to drown.

i was suffering. isolating myself from everyone. i did the absolute bare minimum. i distanced myself from my family, my friends, from everyone around me.

i didnt read for any of my classes. i stopped caring. i had thoughts about dropping out of school. i still have the withdrawal email in my draft.

i want to give someone credit for helping me through this, but i cant. this ocean, its so big. but hell, i havent drowned yet.

meanwhile, im still swimming.

8 notes · View notes