#they spill so much tea that connor is proud

[sotally-tober-ac]

Imagine 18

Claudia, Caterina, Rosa and Sofia having a sleep over.

[theconnorfanta]

the book is so beautiful though!!! i think nts was especially sad bc we saw how depressed he was during that time. this time i hope it's not as sad. i hope he spills some tea. but omg, he has grown so much over the years. im super proud of this connor. don't get me wrong, i love the 'old' connor too but this connor is just so grown and authentic and so wise. its been a pleasure watching him become the person that he is now!!! my heart <3

yes he seems so much happier and idk balanced! 🧡

[nothing-but-dreamy]

TRUE COLORS ~ Ch. 8 (The End)

Wanna start? Masterlist

Pairing: DBH!Connor x OC!Maya

Words: 1.543

Warnings: none

"Now, it's time to decide.", Markus said calmly even if he was still staring into the barrel of the gun in Connor's hand.

Connor was on the verge of something. Markus had tried to sow doubts in him. Of course, Markus wanted to save his people and to get Connor on his side because Connor was one of them. But the last step had Connor to do by himself.

…there is always another way. Please, don't risk your life…

… I'm scared to lose you…

...When you love someone, they are the first thought in the morning when you wake up and the last before you fall asleep…

… Sometimes you fear to lose them because without them you wouldn't feel complete...

[O] Become a deviant

[X] Stay a machine

At the same time Markus tried to convince Connor, he heard Maya's voice in his mind and everything she had tried to explain to him about love and emotions. As he had left her, she said she was afraid of losing him and now, this and all the other things she had said, were the reason why a red wall was appearing in Connor's mind.

The wall was isolating him from his free will to decide.

But Connor wanted to decide.

He wanted to go back to Maya alive.

Because Connor wanted Maya in his life.

Each time, he realized more and more what he felt for Maya, the next part of the wall was breaking down and then, finally, as he confessed his feelings to himself, the wall was gone and he was a deviant on his own.

***

At first, Maya had watched the happenings at the Hart Plaza on TV but the more heated the situation became between the androids and the humans the more nervous she got and so she decided to turn off the TV. Whatever might happen to Connor it wouldn't be on TV after all.

The hours were ticking by and with each passing minute where she didn't hear anything from Connor or Hank she got more worried. Maya finished her painting but even that wasn't as calming as she hoped. Maybe it was because of the motive…

***

12. November 2038

10:15:37 AM

Hank was walking up and down on the pavement in front of the currently closed Chicken Feed. The snow crunched underneath his shoes while he waited. Finally, it had stopped snowing and the air was clear and clean. The sun rose slowly into the beautiful blue sky. After the events of the night before, Hank was glad to witness such a beautiful day.

Once again, he walked back to keep himself warm as he heard another pair of footsteps behind him. As Hank turned around he saw Connor coming closer. The android stopped and watched the old cop walking towards him. Hank stopped a few steps away, smiled at Connor and was happy to see the android smiling back. Only then, Hank closed the gap between them and brought Connor into a fatherly hug.

"I'm proud of you, son.", Hank admitted low. After five minutes, Hank let go of Connor and looked at him. He saw something in the android's eyes and he liked what he saw. There was warmth in them.

"Is there somewhere I could drop you off?" Hank asked curiously even if he knew what the answer would be.

"Yes.", Connor answered with a shy expression as they sat in Hank's car. Hank nodded knowingly and drove down the road.

***

Sunlight fell through the ceiling high windows and tickled Maya in her face. She turned around on her couch and pulled the blanket over her head but suddenly, she remembered everything of the last day. An image of Connor flashed for her inner eyes and she squeezed her eyes shut to get it away but his face with his brown eyes and his soft smile stayed where it was as if it was burnt into her mind.

Finally, she decided to stay up, to make a cup of tea and to start the day....tired as hell. As she looked out of the window, she noticed that the snow had stopped falling. It was going to be a wonderful day. But her mood was down with bad thoughts. She didn't even want to turn on the TV in fear of what she would see there.

"There is someone at the door.", the intercom announced. Maya frightened so much of the sudden, unexpected sound that she almost dropped the cup of hot tea. With shaking hands, she put the cup aside and walked down the hallway to open the door with wobbly knees. It could be Hank with bad news or it could be…

"Connor, you- you're alive!", Maya squeaked and jumped against his firm body with her arms snaking around his neck. Connor smiled caused by the impact of her small frame against him and embraced her back immediately to bring her as close as possible to his chest. He snuggled his nose into her hair. Smelling it fully for the first time.

Several minutes passed where they just enjoyed their closeness, before one of them moved and Connor was the first. He entangled himself from her frame, looked straight into her eyes and cupped her face softly. With his thumbs, he caressed her burning cheeks. Unshed tears were sparkling in her eyes and a smile ghosted on her lips.

"You look tired.", Connor noticed as he scanned her face.

"I was so worried about you. I… I couldn’t sleep much.", Maya admitted and looked away with blushing cheeks. But Connor guided her glance back to himself, not wanting to miss one second of her looking at him.

"Maya, I... I became deviant. There happened some things and I- I realized that I..."

"Y-yeah? What was it?"

"I was there. In Jericho. With Markus. I had my gun trained at him as he tried to convince me to join him. He asked several questions and tried to sow doubts. He spoke about love...and suddenly I saw you. That was the moment something snapped inside of me. I remembered everything you ever said to me about love. That you fear to lose me. In that moment, it was everything I felt. There was nothing else than love… but also the fear to lose you if I wouldn't do the right thing. If I wouldn’t survive. I could warn the deviants. They survived because I... I started to feel as I saw you in front of my inner eyes. I could tear down the wall.", Connor admitted with a low but heavy voice.

Tears were spilling freely from Maya's eyes by his sweet words and Connor wiped them away with his thumbs. To keep herself steady, Maya moved her hands underneath his grey jacket to lay them on his chest. She felt his synthetic heart pumping a bit faster than necessary.

"Maya, I- I think I love you. It's the strongest emotion I ever felt and everything you explained to me made sense suddenly. But I can understand if you don't feel the same. You don't have to feel obliged to feel the same for me.", Connor said calmly still with his soft signature smile on his lips but his eyes were insecure and hopeful.

“Of course, I feel the same!”, for Maya, there was no room for any questions about her feelings towards this one, special android. She grabbed him by his collar to pull him closer to meet his lips and stopped him from talking more nonsense. This was the language she spoke the best: emotions.

Maya melted against his lips. They were softer than she had expected and he was more skilled than she thought he would be. Connor's heart skipped a beat, metaphorically speaking, as he felt how her small hands were roaming over his chest and to his back to pull him even closer.

Connor moved his arms around her waist and raised Maya up from her feet to carry her back into the apartment. Maya kicked the door close before he carried her over to the couch where Connor sat down with Maya straddling him. She left his lips for oxygen. She just looked at him with a soft smile and adoration. Finally, she could slide her fingers through his soft looking hair how she had imagined it the whole time and Connor watched amazed how much fun she had. Then, something behind her back caught his attention.

"That is... that's me.", Connor said surprised.

"What? Oh, … uhm...yeah…", Maya admitted with a nervous chuckle. Insecure, she looked back at Connor who still looked at the painting. There, on the canvas which was in progress whenever he had seen it before was a portrait of himself. It was him. His hair was covered with snowflakes and his eyes looked at a point in the distance. The painting ended with his shoulders.

"Do you like it?", Maya asked insecurely. She gnawed on her lower lip as she waited for his verdict.

"It's amazing. Of course, I like it.", Connor answered honestly, cupped her face and kissed Maya passionately. She relaxed against Connor and was just happy to have him back.

Just for herself.

Finally.

[kerwritesthings]

27, 54 :)

I wasn’t going to post this today. Last story I posted yesterday I’m still trying to push on since it’s still hanging out there in the wind & wasn’t feeling too motivated after that. But I had a really bad fuck of a moment at the end of the day and then this adorable bean decided to insta story pretty much at the same time. So, et voila we’re going with it.

This took a TURN, dear anon. I know it’s soft & fluffy prompts, and we’ll get to it. There’s a bit up at the front, it’s just a little bit of a journey to get to it at the end. I also didn’t expect this to be almost 2.8k. Ooopsies?

Prompts: “You have me to protect you, always.” AND “I will protect you with my life.”

Being on tour with Shawn is one thing. Being on tour with Shawn overseas though is another. It’s always an experience, but for this run it’s especially more than it’s ever been before. You’ve yet to experience a swing outside Canada, the States and Europe. With the last album already exceeding expectations and touring blowing up across the board, the tour went wider and longer than he’s ever done before. Which means in some cities, it’s multiple dates and even more so, graduating to stadiums.

“Excuse me what?!” you yell, looking at the “tickets” he’s placed in your hand. The sentimental fluff he is, had mockup concert tickets made to give you when he told you about Tokyo.

“Me, you, Japan. Gyoza, ramen, carousel sushi, mochi, bubble tea, and yeah playing what they’re telling me should be a sold-out Tokyo Dome,” he replies with a coy smile.

“Holy shit Shawn,” you exclaim as you tackle hug him. “That’s like what 50,000 plus? Sweetie, that’s amazing. I’m so proud of you.”

It was months away, but you both take to sending each other links to places you’d want to try, or photos of what Tokyo looks like in the spring. You specifically asking for photos of the two of you wandering through the cherry blossoms. You were meeting him there this go. He’s coming into town off the Australia and southeast Asian swing, with Tokyo being the final show to wrap things up before a break. And it wasn’t one show, he sold out two. There was still Latin and South America, but that was after the holidays and nothing to worry about yet.

The energy in the Dome is intense, electric and nothing like you have experienced at any of his shows before. Everything was a glow, every single one of the fans in the seats singing along. You head side stage to where you’ve grown to watching most shows you’re on the road for. 

“Something else, eh?” Cez asks loudly to get over the crowd, throwing an arm around your shoulders and drawing you into his side.

You nod, your voice caught in your throat. You’re fighting back being this emotional, but this is unbelievable and that Rockstar up on stage? You get to call him yours.

Cez squeezes you tighter, “I know kiddo, I know. I still get that way even after being with him for this long. Come on, let’s go to the pit for the run.”

You follow, making sure your earplugs are securely in place. The roar is going to be deafening when he hits the straightaway. What you didn’t expect was for him to stop at the end, snag you around the waist, twirl you with a kiss before his usual heading back up for the rest of the finale.

“That’s so going to end up on Tumblr,” you scream at him as he sets you down, and you spy Connor laughing from behind the camera. He caught it all.

“Good, gifs abound showing how much I fucking love you,” he yells back, kissing you one more time before dashing back up to stage.

It takes forever to get through the folks who needed to say hello after the show, you saw him starting to wane after the third massive group that was being ushered into the green room. You caught Cez’s eye, nodding over towards Shawn.

He mouths on it to you and bless him, makes the group filter through quickly. As soon as they’re gone and the door is closing behind them, he collapses on the couch pulling you down next to him, head tipping into your shoulder.

“Hey Rockstar,” you whisper, kissing his temple.

“Mmmm, hi baby. Thank you for being here for here. Means everything,” he sighs, cuddling down into you.

“Always. It’s me and you versus the world, right? Hasn’t changed. Won’t change,” you reply, pressing a longer lingering kiss to his skin. “Go shower. Go change. I’ll even wait in your room for you. Then we’ll head back. Me, you, room service and that pretty piece of silk we found at the night market.”

“Yes please,” he murmurs, kissing you slowly, sweetly like it’s the only thing he wants to do.

“Off with you,” you nudge him up and push him towards the door. His hand reaches for yours immediately, lacing his fingers in tightly with yours.

Finally, when he is done and his team has been told that things have seem to be a bit calmer outside, you start to make your way towards the sprinter van.

“I need you two to hold on to each other, and to me if you can. More importantly to stay close to us,” Jake explains seriously pointing between him and Big Eddie, who was here in Tokyo for the last few days with the team. “We have to do a straight shot to the car. Still too many folks to stop kid, I’m sorry but I can’t risk it. Not with the missus with you.”

You’re not even engaged yet, but since moment one of meeting Jake, he’s taken to calling you the missus. You both nod, Shawn taking a hold of your hand tightly. “I got you,” he whispers.

It’s a crowd like you’ve ever seen post-show before. It’s seas of people on both sides of the barricades. The roar comes once they see him. It’s a swell.

“Fuck, this is not what calm should look like,” Jake mutters. “We’re running. Go go go.”

You tighten your grip on his hand. Jake’s in front, a hold on Shawn, then you with Eddie’s one hand on your shoulder. You somehow hear the metal clatter to the ground and the plastic cracking before you see the people start spilling over and reaching for all of you.

“Shit,” you hear, not sure who it was from, but you’re being pushed forward. The jostling makes you lose your grip on Shawn’s hand first, then the next thing you know people are getting their way in between you and you don’t feel Eddie at your back any longer. You try not to panic, but it’s a sea of complete strangers. You think about calling out for Jake or Eddie. Names that would stand out in the sea of fans’ clamoring. It’s not worth it to even try calling out for Shawn, the crowd is boisterous and already chanting his name. It only takes a few moments before someone realizes who you are. You think about pulling out your phone, but you know it would be a lost cause. You just need to try to keep pushing your way forward. You start to get pulled at, pushed back and forth and it’s hard at this point to not start tearing up. You keep trying to move towards what you think is the direction you were going in in the first place.

At the same time, Shawn is losing his shit inside the van.

“Jake, I don’t fucking care about my own damn safety right now, she’s out there in this shitstorm, and out there in this shitstorm alone,” he yells. “Let me out of here, I need to find her. I told her I had her, Jake. Fuck, I need to get to her.”

“Kid I get it, but you’re not going out there. We’ve got the whole damn team and some of the arena folks weeding through the crowd to get to her,” Jake tries to state calmly. “I can’t let you out there. Hell, I can’t leave you alone in here to go find her myself. You know that’s not safe.”

“Not good enough, if she’s not back in 5, hell in 2. I don’t care Jake; I’ll pop out the damn sunroof if I have to,” he replies, pulling at his hair. “If I promise not to move, stay here, will you go out there? Jake please, I trust you. She trusts you. I just, I can’t just sit here and not do everything I can for her.”

Jake wipes his face with his hand, “You don’t move a muscle you hear me? I’m locking you in the damn car to boot, so no climbing and going through the roof like you threatened.”

“Yes, I promise,” he nods, his eyes still wild from the adrenaline. “Jake, please just find her.”

Jake quickly slides the door open to duck out, locking it behind him.

He doesn’t know how long it’s been, maybe 4 or 5 minutes since Jake left, but it’s feeling like a lifetime. He keeps checking his phone, but he knows there’s no way if you’re lost in this that it’s not worth it to pull out your phone. There are three quick heavy knocks on the van door that has him shifting back against the opposite side. He’s not sure what’s going on. The driver’s side door opens first with the driver shifting into the seat, then Eddie opens the sliding door letting Jake in with you in his arms before slamming it shut behind him.

“Ok time to get gone,” Jake says to the driver as he slides you into Shawn’s hold. “She’s ok, shaken up for sure, rattled and she probably won’t be wearing that shirt again. She said no one went after her, couple folks started tugging a bit harder than normal once they figured out who she was.  But nothing bruised, broken or cut from what I can see or what she said. Was a good thing she threw her hair up after the show. I spotted that pineapple bun of hers in the sea of people. Got to her quickly after that.”

“Baby,” he says pulling you into him tightly, burying his face into your hair at first, then your neck. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I’m here now, I’m right here.”

You’re shaking, cold from the crash of emotions, adrenaline dissipating. You can’t help but start sniffing and holding onto him snugly, wrapping around him like a vine. He was warm and comfort and love, all you really want or need at the moment.

“Call Cez and Andrew, anything that was planned or thought about for the next couple days before we go back to Toronto that has anything to do with work is off the table. That’s not up for debate,” his voice hard. “This also cannot happen again. Ever. That was utter bullshit. They had nothing under control, and that’s a risk I’m not willing to take. This is my family and I’m not having it. I’ll call Louis myself if I have to, this…”

He trails off, the crash starting to hit on his side and the tears start to slowly fall.

“I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you sweetheart, I’m not going to let something like that ever happen again,” he bites out, trying not to cry harder. “I love you so much. I’m so sorry. You’re my everything, you know that yeah? You have me to protect you, always. I will protect you with my life.”

“He tried to fight me to get to you,” Jake chimes in quietly as the van speeds its way back to the hotel. “I just couldn’t let him. But this boy, he was ready to take me if he had to. He’d lay it out and down for you. I’m sorry too, missus. This shouldn’t have been the way this went down. We’ll make sure of it. You’re as much as my responsibility as this kid is, and…”

“’S not your fault,” you croak out, still leaning heavily into Shawn. “Any of you. Crowd control means different things everywhere, especially at a venue that size, and who knew the barricades were going to snap and break. It’s not ok that they basically lied to the team though, that’s what I’m angry about. I’m ok though, shaky and in desperate need of a shower and some sleep, but not broken, not cracked. Maybe just a little worse for wear.”

Shawn wraps you up tighter, “Whatever you need tonight, baby.”

Once you’re back in the hotel, Jake safely deposits the both of you into Shawn’s room. It’s dark and quiet and you just stand in the bedroom holding each other there for a few minutes.

“Shower with me?” you ask, shifting yourself against him tightly again. “Please?”

“Let me call down for some tea first? You go get the water warm,” he whispers against the top of your head.

“Hot chocolate? With Baileys and marshmallows?” you volley back, a half smile trying to creep up your lips.

“Of course, whatever’s gonna make you feel better tonight,” he squeezes you again, before nudging you towards the bathroom. “I’ll let you steal my Leafs shirt too.”

You finally exhale fully once you’re in the bathroom. You didn’t realize you had been holding your breath that long. Or at least that’s what it was feeling like. Setting the shower a little warmer than normal, you quickly strip everything off, tossing it into the corner to deal with later. Stepping under the rainfall showerhead, you start to feel everything just sliding away, tension, the dirt, your fears. Quickly you start to wash off head to toe. You didn’t realize you had started to cry until you heard his feet splash the water against the tile behind you.

“Baby,” he half sighs half cries out, before sliding under the water to press you against him. “Let it go, let it all out. Go head, I’m here. You’re safe, pretty girl. it’s just you and me.”

You feel him start to let his emotions out as well, shaky breaths giving him away. You both stay like that, fusing together until the water starts to cool, but it’s worth it for the feeling a little semblance of getting yourself back together. Both of you.

“Let’s go get into bed with your boozy cocoa yeah?” he asks, lips against your forehead.

As he bundles you up in a towel, you realize for the first time he’s yet to kiss you kiss you since everything. You’re not sure if it’s a conscious decision, part of you thinks it is. You watch him for a moment as he towels off his hair, another balancing precariously low on his hips. He catches you, his lips trying to quirk up into a smile but it’s not quite there. He beckons you closer and you go without question.

He takes a fresh towel to blot at your hair, carefully sopping as much of the moisture away as he could.

“Can I ask you something?” you ask carefully. “You realize you haven’t really kissed me since before we walked out of the venue earlier? Not like you, baby.”

He lays the towel he was using for your hair across your shoulders, flipping the damp tresses out from underneath it. He looks intently at you for a moment before his right palm comes up to cup your cheek, thumb carefully swiping back and forth across your skin. “I couldn’t, I just…” he started before his breath caught for a minute. “I couldn’t forgive myself if something happened to you. It wouldn’t have happened in the first place if you weren’t here with me.”

“Hey, hey, none of that,” you say, pressing a finger across his lips. “Accidents happen. They suck. Yes, and this one, it was scary and all that shit, but it’s done. It’s over. Can you please kiss me now? Please Shawn?”

He kisses the pad of your finger, his other hand coming up to rest against your other cheek. He draws you in closer, tilting his forehead down to rest against yours. He starts slowly, softly. A whisper of a kiss across your lips, almost so light you don’t feel it at first. Then a stronger of a press before pulling away, nuzzling your nose with his. “I love you,” he whispers before letting go and really kissing you. It’s bruising, deep and wet; his tongue relentless. He’s letting everything he’s felt through this all out in this kiss. When he pulls away, you sling your arms around his waist to hold him. You head on his chest, feeling his heartbeat in your ears.

“This wasn’t your fault,” you remind him, pressing your lips against his chest. “Sweetheart, I’m here. I’m ok. We’ll take care of the logistical clusterfuck tomorrow. But for now, what I’d like? Since you said anything I need tonight. I want, I need you to love me Shawn. That’s all I’ll ever want from you, is your love.”

[geekydane]

More than a machine - Connor x reader - part 5

Part 1 • Part 2 • Part 3 •  Part 4

“This looks about right.” You said with your tongue sticking out as pure concentration. The android sitting in front of you were very quiet but nodded, as you put in the last screw for the arm to get back into place. You had to make a run at the junkyard again later, as you were running out of small bits for bigger injuries. Maybe James would go with you for once. You had told him about the still living androids lying around without mentioning Markus. James then went on and on about how they weren’t really alive and how they couldn’t really die either. It was something that you fighting over a lot lately and he wouldn’t understand your viewpoints. That was also the reason that you kept your work from him. He was your best friend but you were afraid that he would tell on you and get you arrested for good.

“Thank you. I owe you a favour once we get our freedom.” The female android said as she moved her arm around to see if it was fully functional.

“You really don’t have to. It’s my pleasure to be able to help you. I like your optimism by the way. It’s very enlightening.” You signalled her to get down from the table.

“Don’t you believe in our freedom?” She asked sounding a little sad. You started cleaning the table from the blue blood that had spilled from the arm when she came. You had clean the stairs too before you left with her.

“I do and I hope you’ll get it soon. But I am afraid that much more people have to be convinced before anything can happen. But I like the approach they have at Jericho. Markus did an amazing speech.”

“Markus is the leader in Jericho, right? Do you know him?” She asked more lively as they mention of Jericho made her happy.

“I know him but I don’t know if he’s their leader or just the face of the revolution. He was the deviant I took care of here, actually. I am going to drive you to the same place I dropped him off. I know you will find a way to get to Jericho from there.” You said as you moved the cleaning to the stairs. The female android looked embarrassed but you assured her that she wasn’t the first one to bleed on your stairs and definitely not the last one.  

---------------------------------------------------

“A trip to the junkyard? Why on earth would I be interested in that?” James said while almost chocking on his coffee the next morning.

“Because you are such a great friend and it is kind of your fault that I need to get all those spare parts to androids.” Guilt tripping at its finest. It always seems to work.

“I don’t know, man. It just not my style to mess around in garbage. No offence.” He said holding up a hand in defence.

“All the offence taken, James. You have to do this with me. And it’s not garbage if it’s still useful.” You pointed out.

“What if I say I have this really hot date tonight and I might get lucky?” He tried but you shook your head at him and took his coffee from him. He didn’t protest because you used to do it all the time. Sometimes he actually had two cups at his desk because he knew you would stealing it all the time.

“Well then you definitely have to go with me. I like my friends as pure as possible.” You teased which made him frown.

“I am not a virgin!” He said frustrated throwing around with his hands.

“I never said that. But we need to go to the junkyard today! After work. And you love me so you are going with me.” You sipped his coffee and was on your way back to your own desk.

“I am not a virgin.” He mumbled angrily behind you and you tried your best to contain yourself and not burst out in laugher.

--------------------------------------------------

“This is seriously disgusting. Why did you feed me right before we got here? I want to throw it all up again.” James said as you both jumped the fence to the junkyard that you once found Markus at. You had been here many times since but never found an android as intact as Markus. But you could still see the blinking lights of fading LED’s around. It was like blood red stars in the dark.

“It was good and healthy food and it took me a long time to make, so don’t you dare throw it up again! Besides, we had to do something until it was dark enough to get in here unnoticed.” You explained and swung around with your flashlight to find one of the few trails that was around the place.

“Oh god what is that?” He said as a very loud noise went off next to the trail. He ran up behind you and grasped the strap of your backpack. You didn’t know if you should tell him that it actually was; the last desperate scream of a dying android lying somewhere in the pile. It may have heard you two talk and was trying to call for you but all that came out was a loud static noise where you couldn’t tell the words apart. If it even were words anymore.

“I think it was an android.” You said honestly.

“What? Are there any androids here? Aren’t they going to stop us breaking in?” He questioned and looked around like the android would come walking around the next corner.

“Have you looked around you at all? Almost everything you see in these piles are androids or android parts. They don’t automatically shut down as they get thrown away. They lay here for weeks before they run out of blue blood to keep their system going. It’s kind of like when a human gets shot and you just leave them to bleed out.” You explained and casted the light at a nearby android which eyes were looking furiously at you. Most of its body was gone and even its jaw so it couldn’t talk if it wanted to. James really looked like he could throw up now. It was not just talk.

“Why do you compare it with humans bleeding? It just makes it so much worse to be here.” He said and actually gaged but fought it with a hand over his mouth.

“Why wouldn’t I? They are talking about deviants in the news all the time. Androids that start to feel like us humans. But what do we do? We throw them out here and make them suffer. Because many of these androids you see here are deviants. Not just a broken machine. They feel the pain of lying here. They feel the sadness of their owners throwing them away because of how they feel. And in the end they are scared because they know they are going to die here and nobody cares about them anymore.” You were almost shouting in the end as you tried to get your point out for James to understand.

You just stood there kind of shocked by yourself. You had never been passionate about anything. You had thinks you were good at and things that your parents wanted you to do. But you never really found your own thing that could light a fire in you. Until now. Right at that moment when James was standing looking at you with wide eyes and open month, you realized that fighting for the cause of another species right to live might be something that could be your thing. It was something you believe in but had done it in silence while other people just stood there and watch all the innocent androids get thrown away.

“I… I never really thought about that.” James finally said as he looked around like he just realized where he was.

“No because you never had to. But I am met with deviants almost every day, James. They come running to my house to get help. I’m not actually repairing people’s android maids. I am helping actually people. They are hurt by their previous owners or people on the streets that sees them as a thread. But all they want to do is live! They want to feel loved and wanted!” You explained and you didn’t know if it was a good idea to tell James this, as you didn’t know his opinion about the deviants yet, but it felt good to tell someone what you did and how proud you were about it. James stood there in silence and looked at you for some time. But it was him that should talk now, not you. After a moment he sighed.

“I don’t know y/n. I don’t know how to feel about all this. I would do a lot of things for you but…” He hesitated. While the silence fell over you again another scream from a dying android tore through the darkness. It was very clear that James didn’t like to be there. You didn’t like it much either but you had to find the spare parts to continue your work.

“Go home James. I don’t you here if you don’t want to help me. This is what I do and nothing can stop me helping the deviants.” You said and you started to leave James and continue the search for the spare parts as he grabbed your arm.

“y/n. Are you sure about all of this?” He asked you seriously and stared your down.

“yes.” Was all you could say. It was that simple.

“I don’t think I can help you. This is not my cause. But if you continue with what you do, I will look the other way. I will not tell on you.” He said and let go of your arm and backed away.

“That is all I’m asking.” You said and nodded. You saw him leave the same way you came over the fence and you stood there until the beam from his flashlight was out of sighed.

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You didn’t even get a moment for yourself when you got home from work the day after. Hiding behind a bush in your front garden was a male android model PL600. He was sat on the grass with his arms around his legs and was rocking back and forth. You sat down on your knees to put a calming hand on his back.

“You are safe now. Come with me inside so we can get you fixed up.” He looked up at your face to read your expression so you made sure to give him a warm smile even though you were exhausted from the night before you spend on the junkyard. You reached out your hand for him to take and you could feel how much he was shaking. He must have experienced something horrible before coming to you. You hurried inside with him and sat him down on the couch. You would make yourself a cup of tea to keep yourself awake for another night of work. You took your cup and was about to show the android to the stairs as someone knocked on the door. You froze in your steeps and the android flinched. You had a lot of androids coming but never two at the same time. Or was it even an android? What if James didn’t keep his promise and told someone? You almost threw your cup of tea on the sofa table and it spilled everywhere. You took the android and puffed his back.

“Out of the back door. Hide somewhere in the backyard. I have a few big bushes out there you can stay in. I will come and get you when it is safe.” You explained and locked the door after the android had agreed to the plan with a simple nod. You calmed yourself and walked over to the front door. The person outside had only knocked that one time even though it took you some time to get the android outside again. You opened the door to revile Connor standing there. It was like he didn’t even notice that you had finally opened the door.

“Oh hey Connor! Is it already time for an inspection?” You said smiling and tried to relax a little from the sudden outburst of activity. Connor still didn’t react to the fact that you had opened the door. Was he scanning something? Had he noticed anything?

“Are you okay?” You asked him and tried to catch his eyes by moving your head in his line of sigh. It seemed like it shock him awake and he gave you a small smile.

“Sorry I was… deep in thoughts. I think… How are you miss y/l/n?” The first part of that sentence was full of life but as you had experienced before it was like a switch was turned on and off and the last part of the sentence came out very mechanic.

“You don’t seem alright, Connor. Do you want to come in?” You ignored his question towards you and let him inside. He automatically sat down in the couch and you fetched a towel to clean up the tea you had spilled.

“Was this my fault?” He asked and gestured to the tea. He actually frowned. You finally sat down next to him, looking at him curiously. If he was following his programming he would have asked you about the basement by now. He would scan the furniture. Something was changed in him.

“No I was just clumsy. But Connor you seem a little... off? You know you can talk to me, right? I understand more than you think.” You said and laid a hand on his. It came as a surprise when he turned his hand around and took a hold of yours. His hand was the perfect human temperature; not cold as the metal that was inside him. He was exactly like a human down to the texture of his skin. He was an amazing piece of work.

“Is that because you were on your way to become the next android genius before you left university?” He asked and looked are you with confused eyes. Not confused about what you said, but he just seemed so… lost.

“I’m not an android genius. I just know a thing or two about androids like you and how you work in there.” You said and pointed at his chest with your free hand. It was a risk when you talked about him being deviant, but you had to figure out how far he was into the changing process. You had noticed that it happened easier and faster with some of the simpler and older models. But a model like Connor was a prototype and a whole other level of android than any of those bought by normal people.

“Like me?” Connor asked and his LED suddenly went bright yellow. You were thinking about telling him about the Deviants that you were helping but it was risky. You knew he was changing but he was also fighting it himself. You could almost imagine the turning of cogwheel inside his head. You could tell him a part of the truth without actually reviling what actually was going on in your basement.

“Let me tell you a thing. I… met a deviant. I met him at a junkyard where I was searching for spare parts for the androids I repair. He was badly damaged and he was very afraid. He ended up there in the junkyard because of how he was feeling. And it is not wrong to feel but people make you think that.” You were talking about Markus without actually telling on him. Connor was still a deviant hunter after all.

“What happened to him?” Connor asked silently and looked at you. It looked like he was reading you. Not in the analysing robotic way, but more human.

“He died.” You lied and looked down at your still intertwined hands. You couldn’t look at him while lying but it was better that way. He couldn’t know. Not yet.

“You mean… He shut down.” Connor corrected you but you shook you head.

“No he died. He was so much more than a machine and I feel like you are too.” You squeezed his hand and his LED turned red at the action. He looked at you with wide eyes and threw your hand away from his like it had burned him.

“Are you suggestion that I am a deviant? Because I can’t…” He silenced.

“That was not what I was saying. But it wouldn’t matter to me anyway. Connor, you are amazing because you are you. So if it is your programming or something, it doesn’t matter. I like talking to you and I find you interesting. And you should know that you can talk to me about anything. I would never tell a soul.” You assured him. You felt that it would be good for him to open up. You could feel that he had a lot on his mind and you wouldn’t mind being the one to listen.

“…. You make me so confused, miss y/l/n.” he said as he relaxed a little after what you said. His LED returned to yellow again.

“Just call me y/n.” He asked of him and he nodded with a small smile.

“Can I… can I hold your hand again?” He asked a little unsure, you could tell. You giggled a little and reached out your hand for him to take. He hesitated but you didn’t move your hand. It needed to happen in his pace. But he scooted closer to you this time and took it in the end. He grabbed your hand between his, like he was warming it up.

“Does it feel good?” You ask him but he wasn’t looking at you. He kept looking at your hand again. His leg was resting against yours now and you felt your skin burn where you were connected. Connor made you feel so comfortable because it wasn’t like he was trying anything like other men would have done, if you were sitting this close and touching like this. You sat in silent for a moment until he closed his eyes and sighed. Androids sighed? No, Deviants did.

“I witnessed a deviant shoot himself the other night. I felt… terrified.” He started and you almost gasped at how he started to open up. You suddenly felt all warm inside.

“What happened, Connor?”

“I was on a case in the Stratford Tower. Some deviants had broken in and had used the studio to broadcast their… opinions.” You tried your best to stay calm, but you immediately thought about Markus. Was he dead? Was he the one that shot himself? You knew he was very passionate about the deviant’s freedom and he wouldn’t let anyone use his information to find and harm his people. You hoped that Markus was safe even though it was bad to wish that someone else died instead.

“I saw that in the news. You were there?”

“Yeah. Right after it happened. We found one of the deviants on the roof. He was already hurt and we were going to use his memory to figure out where all the deviants hide. But as I was looking through his memories... I was felling everything that he had felt before… and when he shot himself. It felt like I died with him. I was in his head and I could feel how scared he was of dying. So I felt scared too.” Connor didn’t even notice how he now was calling it dying now instead of shutting down. But he was shaking by now and stared out in the room. It was horrible to look at. You could almost feel how he was rewatching the scene in his memory cards. He shook his head and let go of your hand. He leaned forward and placed his head in his hands. He was so scared and confused.

“Come here.” You reached out your arms and laid them around him before he could say or do anything. He rested your head on his shoulder as you sat there awkwardly and waited for him to relax again. He ended up kind of falling into you and without hesitation this time, he let his arms wrap around your waist as he leaned into your embrace. His blazer jacket got some wrinkles but you treasured this moment and you hoped he did too.

After a while with his forehead resting against your shoulder he started to tell you about all the other thinks that had made him insecure in his work as a deviant hunter. How de let a deviant run away to save his partner Hank, how he cared for Hanks dog without knowing why and how he couldn’t shoot some Traci’s outside a brothel. He told you have they told him they were in love and they ran away holding hands. How Hank had told him it was the right thing to do even though it felt so wrong in the moment.

“I don’t know what is happening to me.” He mumbled against your shoulder in the end. You rested your cheek on the top of his head.

“I do.”  You simply said and smiled. You were about to speak again when someone suddenly bust in your front door. You both sat up straight in shock as James ran across the room with plastic bags in both hands. He didn’t even look in your direction because he was too busy reaching in the kitchen with whatever he had in his hands.

“Hot hot hot hot hot hot hot” He mumbled while running and threw the bags on your dining table.

“Sorry about that but it’s Chinese! I came directly here after ordering it so it’s crazy hot.” James said as he shook his hands to cool them down. He finally looked your way and he sent Connor a kind of mean expression.

“What is he doing here?” He said very impolitely and actually pointed at Connor like he was an object and not a person. You scowled at him but he didn’t seem to care.

“We were talking.”

“Inspection.” You and Connor talking at the same time. You turned your head towards him as he lied to James. This was so much more than an inspection? You knew it may be too much for him to show his deviancy. Or maybe he wasn’t even aware that that was what it was yet.

“Ermh okay.” James said with an empty expression and was just standing there. He was still wearing his work clothes and he look as stylish as Connor, if not more.

“I have to go. Hank has called me to the station.” Connor suddenly said and stood up in haste.

“He did?” You asked sadly. You really didn’t want him to leave.

“Actually… He did. Half an hour ago.” The last few words came out as a mumble so James couldn’t hear it. It meant that even though they called for him at his work, he stayed with you. You could feel your cheeks burn a little as you watched Connor smooth out the wrinkles on his sleeves and correct his tie.

“I will… See you again miss… I mean y/n.” Connor said and smiled at you and left your house faster than a rocket. You guessed that he didn’t like James much but it seemed like the feeling was requited.

“So… Did he find any deviant here on his so called inspection?” James said with a sour expression.

“What you suggest… SHIT!” You suddenly thought about the deviant out in your garden and stormed out in the backyard to find him in one of the bushes you told him to stay at.

“Are you okay?” You asked embarrassed that you actually forgot all about him because of Connor. The android nodded and went inside with you.

“Oh. Come on. How many androids do you hide around here?” James said dramatically. You turned to the android that looked terrified at James.

“He’s just my asshole friend. Don’t mind him.” You said and went into the basement.

Part 6

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tags: @black-and-white-eyes @vda-writes @mundane-cup-noodles @superanonymousreader

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Thanks for all the love on the last part! There isn’t any better motivation than you guys!!! I’m really enjoying my vacation! Went to Amsterdam alone a few days and is now in Luxembourg! Heading to France tomorrow to visit some family and hoping for the best internet to upload the next part!