#they openly chose to rebel from god | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

waynecowles · 3 months ago

Text

Nineveh and America - Nathele Graham - [email protected]

History can teach us some important lessons. Unfortunately, people are hard-headed. We believe we are special or different than the people who came before us. Thus, we are doomed to make the same mistakes as our forefathers. Scripture contains many lessons we should learn. “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness.” 2 Timothy 3:16.

Too many Christians think the Old Testament is “boring” or it doesn’t pertain to today. In fact, it’s the foundation of the New Testament. Many Christians race through reading Scripture to finish in a year in order to get a certificate. The problem is there’s no study. For instance, what about Jonah? Is it more than a story about a man eaten by a fish? It’s much more. Let’s take a look.

Jonah tried to run away from God. I often wonder why God chose him to carry such an important message of repentance to a wicked Gentile city. Jonah gives us many lessons, and one is that if God chooses you for a task, don’t run away. God told Jonah “Arise, go to Nineveh, that great city, and cry against it; for their wickedness is come up before me.” Jonah 1:2.

Nineveh was the capital city of Assyria and their wickedness was legendary. When they conquered a nation, they made sure people suffered greatly. They worshipped pagan gods, so there was no moral integrity. Jonah’s reaction to God’s call was understandable. “But Jonah rose up to flee unto Tarshish from the presence of the LORD, and went down to Joppa, and he found a ship going to Tarshish: so he paid the fare thereof, and went down into it, to go with them unto Tarshish from the presence of the LORD.” Jonah 1:3.

There’s always a price to pay when we rebel against God, and Jonah’s price would be much more than just the price of passage on a boat. A mighty storm came up, and the pagan crew of the ship prayed to their pagan gods to no avail. Where was Jonah? He was sleeping. Here’s a lesson for Christians. We all have a calling from God, but many of us are asleep. We are to spread the Gospel but we sleep while the storm of wickedness rages. When all seemed lost, the captain found Jonah and said “…What meanest thou, O sleeper? Arise and call upon thy God, if so be that God will think upon us, that we perish not.” Jonah 1:6b.

The captain didn’t believe in the one, true God, but as they say “Any port in a storm”. It’s a shame that Jonah didn’t openly pray to God and obey His instructions. What a witness that would have been. Wake up, Christians.

The sailors drew lots and determined that Jonah was to blame. It was Jonah’s rebellious attitude towards God having mercy upon a merciless pagan nation. He answered their questions saying “And he said unto them, I am an Hebrew; and I fear the LORD, the God of heaven, which hath made the sea and the dry land.” Jonah 1:9.

Finally, Jonah was being truthful. The sailors couldn’t believe he had tried to run from God and wanted to know what they could do to stop the tempest. Jonah told them to throw him into the sea. Well, the sailors had some integrity and didn’t want that to happen, but an amazing thing happened to these pagan sailors. They cried out to God. “Wherefore they cried unto the LORD, and said, ‘We beseech thee, O LORD, we beseech thee, let us not perish for this man’s life, and lay not upon us innocent blood: for thou, O LORD, hast done as it pleased thee.” Jonah 1:14.

One person speaking up for God can bring others to belief. The sailors threw Jonah overboard, and the storm stopped. The sailors were afraid, but they offered a sacrifice to the LORD. The story could end there with Jonah paying the price of his sin while the sailors rejoiced in their new-found faith and the calming of the tempest, but God still wanted Jonah to go to Nineveh. So, the LORD, prepared a great fish to swallow Jonah “…And Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.” Jonah 1:17b.

This strengthened Jonah’s faith, but he still didn’t want to go to Niveveh. “Then Jonah prayed unto the LORD his God out of the fish’s belly, and said, I cried by reason of mine affliction unto the LORD, and he heard me, out of the belly of hell cried I, and thou heardest my voice.” Jonah 2:1-2.

My fellow Americans, is that where we are? Are we in the belly of hell? The United States is in dire straits. Like Jonah, Christians have a message to deliver, but it looks as if we are running away from God. We’re surrounded by pagan worship. Maybe people don’t openly worship pagan gods, but they don’t worship the one true God, so by default, demons are worshipped.

America was founded upon Biblical principles. The men who founded this nation weren’t perfect, but they understood basic God-ordained rights. The Declaration of Independence contains some words to pay attention to. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” Yes, our Creator has endowed us with rights, but America seems to be under siege by wickedness and evil. The leaders of this nation have little or no knowledge of God, and care little for the individual people. The Republic of the United States, has become a tyrannical dynasty, led by people who encourage the pagan gods of evil that have brought destruction to many nations. Abortion is nothing less than sacrificing children to the demon god, Molech. The arms of this idol were heated and babies were sacrificed by putting their little bodies in his arms. God told the Israelites “And thou shalt not let any of thy seed pass through the fire to Molech, neither shall thou profane the name of thy God: I am the LORD.” Leviticus 18:21.

Today, abortion kills babies in a mother’s womb. As the tiny body is brutalized, the cries cannot be heard. “Again, thou shalt say to the children of Israel, ‘Whosoever he be of the children of Israel, or of the strangers that sojourn in Israel that giveth any of his seed unto Molech; he shall surely be put to death: the people of the land shall stone him with stones.” Leviticus 20:2.

This is addressed to Israel, but Christians claim to belong to God and we need to honor Him. The leaders of our nation have legalized many abominations that are offensive to God. Creation of the world is credited to chance and happenstance (evolution) and not to God. “In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth.” Genesis 1:1. Our leaders mock God by allowing evolutionary lies to be taught to our children. “And changed the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and fourfooted beasts, and creeping things.” Romans 1:23.

There are consequences to disobeying God. Jonah spent time in the belly of a great fish, but the consequences to denying God as the Creator brings the abomination of homosexuality. “Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves: Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.” Romans 1:24-25.

Mocking God is never good. “For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use unto what is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another: men with men working that which is unseemly and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.” Romans 1:26-27.

Wake up, Christians. We must not allow God to be mocked. The mocking was very evident during the opening ceremony of this year’s Olympics. Are we like Jonah? Are we sleeping while the demonic wickedness in world rages? Do we approve of the evil by keeping silent? If you don’t participate in the evil but watch with pleasure and accept it, God isn’t pleased. “Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such thigs are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.” Romans 1:32.

Americans have a vote and the last 4 years have been miserable. Before that we had the wickedness of Ahab and Jezabel (the Clintons) and the Obama years. None of these people deserve our vote. We will not survive an administration of Harris. Christians, we must take a stand. Jonah could have avoided much trouble if he had obeyed God and gone to preach to Ninevah. He finally remembered God and prayed. “They that observe lying vanities forsake their own mercy.” Jonah 2:8.

The New King James translation makes the meaning clearer “Those who regard worthless idols Forsake their own Mercy.” Jonah 2:8 (NKJ). When you find yourself in the belly of a great fish, you realize you need to repent. Jonah did, and so must Christians today. We need to start making our voices heard in our government, whether in America or in other nations. Repent and turn from wickedness. “And the LORD spake unto the fish, and it vomited out Jonah upon the dry land.” Jonah 2:10.

Jonah must have been a mess and smelly. Sin and rebellion are always messy. Jonah’s mission wasn’t over. “And the word of the LORD came unto Jonah the second time saying, Arise, go unto Nineveh, that great city, and preach unto it the preaching that I bid thee.” Jonah 3:1-2.

Jonah did go to Nineveh but wasn’t happy about it. Christian’s have been forgiven of our sins and now, we too, must go and joyously preach the Gospel to a fallen world.

Nineveh was a very large city. The wickedness and evil found there was unspeakable. What would you do if God called you to preach repentance to San Francisco, Los Angeles, New York City, or Washington D.C.? Would you willingly preach, or would you run the other way? Would you like for God’s wrath to be poured upon the wicked, or would you want them to understand His love and mercy? Jonah was blunt as he delivered the message? And Jonah began to enter into the city a day’s journey, and he cried, and said, ‘Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown.” Jonah 3:4.

Really? Jonah had received God’s mercy from being in the belly of a great fish, but Jonah could only say you have 40 days and then it’s over. Jesus Christ gave His life for us. If you’ve repented and received His forgiveness for your sin, then preach the truth with joy and gladness! It seems as if Jonah didn’t really want those in Nineveh to find God’s grace. They showed him! “So the people of Nineveh believed God, and proclaimed a fast, and put on sackcloth, from the greatest of them even to the least of them. For word came unto the king of Nineveh, and he arose from his throne, and he laid his robe from him and covered him with sackcloth, and sat in ashes.” Jonah 3:5-6.

Can you imagine how great a nation could be if even the leaders repented and embraced God? The king decreed that everybody fast and cover themselves in sackcloth, including the animals. “Who can tell if God will turn and repent, and turn away from his fierce anger, that we perish not?” Jonah 3:9.

Scripture tells us that God is willing to forgive all sin, but there has to be true repentance. “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways: then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.” 2 Chronicles 7:14.

Christians, we are called by God’s name. It’s time for us to humble ourselves and pray, seek God’s face instead of following the ways of sin, repent and turn from our wicked ways. Why should God bless us when we mock Him?

What if there was true repentance in France, or Great Britain, Canada, or the United States? Would we put off judgment? What if Hollywood and the entertainment industry stopped putting out movies and music that glorify sin? Could it happen? If Nineveh could repent, even America can. “And God saw their works, that they turned from their evil way; and God repented of the evil, that he had said that he would do unto them, and he did it not.” Jonah 3:10.

Jonah wasn’t at all pleased. He wanted Nineveh to be destroyed. “But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was very angry.” Jonah 4:1. He told God that this is why he tried to flee to Tarshish. He didn’t want Nineveh to be spared from God’s wrath. Is this why we don’t share God’s truth with people? Are we afraid our worse enemy will repent and find God’s mercy and grace?

There’s more to the story of Nineveh. It’s easy to return to wickedness and evil. That happened in Nineveh. About 140 years after their revival, they fell back into their evil ways. When you know a repentant sinner, do you disciple them and help them live for Christ? Have you taught your children and grandchildren to love God? If you haven’t, then there’s a good chance they will return to the evil of the world. Public school is no place for a Christian child. They will be educated into the ways of the world and embrace the sin found there. Social media needs to be monitored by parents. The Ninevites reverted to their evil ways, and it can happen today. The return to their old ways can be seen in 2 Kings and Isaiah, as Nineveh again came against Israel.

God is slow to anger, but this should never be seen as acceptance of sin. He sent Jonah to witness to them, but we read in Nahum that God finally had enough of their wickedness. “The LORD is slow to anger, and great in power, and will not at all acquit the wicked: the LORD hath his way in the whirlwind and in the storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet.” Nahum 1:3. Is America about to see God’s anger? Remember that there is always forgiveness through Jesus Christ. True repentance will bring true salvation. We cannot hold onto our wicked ways and expect God to acquit us. We cannot continue to turn against Israel and expect God’s blessing.

America, remember Nineveh and turn from wickedness. We must ove the Lord our God with all that’s in us and serve Him alone.

God bless you all,

Nathele Graham

[email protected]

Recommended prophecy sites:

www.raptureready.com

www.prophecyupdate.com

www.raptureforums.com

All original scripture is “theopneustos” God breathed.

If you would like to be on my mailing list to receive the commentaries just drop me an email and let me know.

“Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: they shall prosper that love thee.” Psalm 122:6.

0 notes

just-another-blog-of-fluff · 3 years ago

Text

Learning to Forgive

Word count: 6650

Warnings: self-depreciation, this time on Loki's part. Mild swearing. Also some ruthless Loki 😉

Alright, this one combines three prompts! The main storyline is based on this Prompt from @pamcake21. I also incorporated two other prompts (here and here) from two anons. Hopefully this doesn't feel overly scattered - my brain feels a bit scattered today 😂

Loki wasn’t usually late. He prided himself on his punctuality, frequently reminding you of that fact when you would wander into a meeting minutes after it started. So, it was unusual to you as you sat in the driver’s seat of one of Tony’s cars getting ready to leave for a mission, that Loki still hadn’t come outside to meet you. Usually, it was the other way around when you were paired on missions.

At least it meant you got to claim the driver’s seat this time – Loki’s driving was absolutely terrifying.

A few minutes later, the door to the passenger’s side whipped open, and Loki plunked himself unceremoniously into the seat. He slammed the door shut just a bit more forcefully than was truly necessary.

“Wow, Loki, you’re never late,” you noted teasingly. He turned his head just slightly, enough to glare at you out of the corner of his eye, as he leaned back into his seat with his arms folded tightly across his chest.

“Just drive.”

“Alright, I’m going, I’m going.” You threw the car in drive and pulled out into the street, setting course on route to your destination.

The mission you were headed off to was fairly low risk. You didn’t anticipate any fighting, so long as you and Loki played your parts well. The pair of you were assigned to meet up with the leader of a rebel faction under the ruse of joining their cause. Go in, get intel, get out. A simple task for the silver-tongued god and the clever, undercover spy. Of course, you knew it wouldn’t be so simple if Loki’s head wasn’t in the right place.

He was silent, sullenly staring straight ahead out the front window as you drove. Normally he made snide comments about your driving skills, knowing how much you hated his driving. Loki may not like it, but you had worked with him long enough to recognize when something was off about him, despite how closed off he tended to be. You couldn’t take the silence for the entire half hour drive there, and you needed him to focus on the mission.

“Ok. What’s wrong, Loki?” you asked, glancing at him in your peripheral vision.

“Nothing.” His tone was flat, head still pointed straight ahead at the road in front of you.

“Come on, you never shut up usually. Don’t lie to me.”

He let out a huff of annoyance through his nose at the comment, finally turning his gaze to look at you. “If you must know, my dear brother–“ he spat the word, as if it were vile, “- said something out of line to me prior to our departure. He wasn’t pleased when I shouted at him.”

“What did he say to you?”

“I’d rather not discuss it right now.” Loki turned his head to face front once again, leaning back into his seat as if to end the conversation.

“Well, you don’t have to tell me. But you do need to stop pouting like a child – we need to focus on the mission.” You turned your head slightly to give him a brief, scorning look, returning your eyes to the road.

“I am not ‘pouting like a child.’ And I’m plenty focused.”

“Mmhmm. What’s the name of the person we’re meeting, then?”

Loki was silent. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his face fall into a scowl. You knew he knew you were right, although he’d never openly admit it. You chose not to dwell on it, though, knowing that now was not the time to poke fun at the grouchy god.

The silence pressed heavily on your ears, and so you turned on the radio just to fill it with something more pleasant. Flipping through stations, you finally landed on one that wasn’t at commercial and was playing something halfway decent, although the song was nearly over. At least it provided some background noise while you wracked your brain trying to decide how you were going to get Loki out of this funk.

The song that came on next was sort of nostalgic, bringing you right back to your school days. Just listening to it awoke the urge in you to sing along obnoxiously loud and dance, the way you’d done years ago at the school dances. Of course, you weren’t about to randomly burst into song in front of Loki, who would never let you live it down, so you settled on bobbing your head to the beat and humming along with the melody here and there.

“What are you doing?” Loki asked suddenly.

“I like this song. My friends and I used to rock out to it when I was younger.”

“Yes, but what are you doing with your head?”

“It’s called moving to the beat, Loki. You should try it sometime.” You shook your head a bit, a smirk tugging at your lips.

“Well, you look ridiculous.” Loki was looking at you now, his arms no longer folded tightly across his chest. That was something, at least. Maybe this was just the distraction he needed.

“Oh, do I?” Allowing a grin to overtake your features, you continued bobbing your head more vigorously, tapping on the steering wheel to the beat of the song. “How about now?”

“Now I’m just convinced you’re losing your mind.” You took a quick glance at your grumpy companion, seeing a hint of a grin at the corners of his mouth.

“Losing my mind? Seriously, Loki, have you never just let yourself feel the music? I promise it won’t kill you.”

The song swelled into the chorus, heavy drums and electric guitar playing behind the lead singer as they chanted the lyrics. You were all in this now – he already thought you were crazy, and if this was going to get him to stop sulking, well, you supposed you could take the teasing you’d inevitably get later. You inhaled deeply, then began loudly belting out the lyrics while tapping your hand hard against the steering wheel to the beat. Your voice sounded sort of obnoxious like this, but it was intentional, trying to crack a smile on the face of the Asgardian seated next to you.

It worked.

You could tell it was an involuntary smile, as he fought it for a few moments while giving you a confused, almost appalled look. Stopping at a stop light, you turned to look more fully at him and saw the amused grin spread reluctantly across his face. He shook his head at you, letting out a breathy laugh through his nose.

“You are positively ludicrous.”

“Come on, sing with me!” You patted his knee, turning your focus back to the road as the light flickered to green.

“Absolutely not.”

“You’re no fun!” You continued on with your little show until the song ended, sighing contentedly as the last notes faded into the next song. “Well, at least one of us is enjoying this drive.”

“Oh, I’m enjoying it. You’ve provided me ample ammunition to ridicule you for the next week,” Loki teased.

“Totally worth it.” You turned the steering wheel to pull into the parking lot at your destination. “Alright, put on your illusion, we’re here.”

With a glow of green light, Loki transformed his appearance, taking on the features of a random passerby you’d passed on your drive. He had short, blonde hair and a square jaw, slight stubble gracing his chin. But his eyes remained the same, a bright blue green that always bore a slight gleam of mischievous intent.

The faction leader had set up a meeting location that was on neutral ground, outdoors in a community park so there wouldn’t be any risk of security cameras overlooking the conversation. You stepped out of the car, squaring your shoulders, and making your way over to the third park bench where you’d agreed to meet, Loki pacing along at your side.

Someone was already seated on the bench. With dark hair, dark eyes, and a stern, hardened expression, it was clear this was the person you were supposed to meet, despite the fact that she wore seemingly normal street clothes. You greeted the woman with a nod, taking a seat on the bench beside her while Loki (or, James, as you’d decided to call him) stood facing the two of you. He played it off as not wanting to squish three people on one bench, but you knew he liked to remain on his feet in case some issue were to arise that required his combat skills.

You spoke quietly enough so as not to allow passerby to overhear the conversation, but not in such hushed voices as to draw suspicion to yourselves. The woman described the mission of her rebellious group – steal from the richest men and women in the city to better spread the wealth to the poor. The sentiment was honorable, except for the fact that their faction was more than willing to do what it took to achieve their goal, including disposing of those who got in their way. At least it was easy for the pair of you to act as though you were truly interested in joining the cause, although you certainly didn’t condone the violent and murderous path they planned to take to fight for it.

As the conversation came to a close, you provided the woman with false contact information, a phone number and email address that Tony had set up with the intent of continuing to track the movements of this rebel gang. There was no need for fighting today – you got the information you’d come for, and the woman was none the wiser as to who you truly were.

Loki waited until you’d driven a couple miles down the street to drop the illusion, the sudden flash of green light catching your eye as he transformed back to the dark-haired, lanky God of Mischief you knew. You both remained silent for some time, and you flipped on the radio once again to ease the tension.

“Thor suggested that I may not be trustworthy enough for this mission.” Loki’s deep, gravelly voice almost surprised you when he finally spoke. “He said he was concerned I would… defect from his little band of heroes. That I’d be easily manipulated and swayed to join this rebel organization, given how easy it has been for villains to do so in the past.”

Your heart wrenched at the revelation. Despite the front Loki put on, that he was independent and didn’t need anyone’s approval to be happy (especially not his brother’s), you knew deep down the words stung, slicing into a wound that had never quite healed over all these years.

You also knew that he didn’t want to be pitied. That, above all else, made him feel weak. Powerless. Despite how much your heart ached for him, you couldn’t just come out and tell him so. You knew he’d put up his wall and close into himself if you did that.

“What did you say?” you asked gently.

“I told him he’d never trusted me. Not when we were children, and certainly not now. That despite the fact that he was the reckless one, I bore the brunt of our father’s disappointment.” He took in a breath. “I told him that I knew he’d never learn to trust me, that it was meaningless to try. And then I left.”

You didn’t respond at first, trying to think of what to say. Before you could open your mouth, Loki spoke again.

“He’s probably right.”

“What?” You took advantage of the traffic at the stop light ahead to get a better look at his face. He was staring blankly straight ahead, his mouth unreadable but his eyes telling you everything you needed to know. “You think you’re weak for agreeing with their cause?”

“It’s exactly as my brother said.”

“Loki –“ The car in front of you began moving, and you were forced to return your gaze to the road. “I agree with their cause. I just don’t agree with the means with which they intend to achieve their mission.”

He sniffed out a laugh. “That’s where you and I are different. I can understand the reasoning behind their methods. The feeling of hopelessness, of being beaten down by the world around you until you break.”

“And would you do what they intend to do now?”

Loki let out a long, drawn-out sigh. “No. I wouldn’t.”

“Then you’re different. You’re strong-willed. You’re not easily manipulated.”

He hummed thoughtfully, remaining silent on the issue after that. But he was no longer contracted into himself, and his face had taken on more of a pondering expression. That had to be something, at least.

“You can sing, can’t you?”

You snorted in surprise at the sudden change of subject. “Whahat? I mean, of course I can sing, it is a physiologic capability of mine.”

“That’s not what I mean. I suspect you have a talented singing voice, despite the fact that you hid it underneath that ridiculous hollering you call singing that you demonstrated earlier.”

“First of all, I’m not sure what made you decide to steer the conversation in this direction – you’ve completely careened off the road we were on and...”

“I bring it up because I’d like to hear it.”

You had to fight the sudden urge to slam your foot on the brakes.

“W-why do you want to hear me sing?” Your face flushed with heat at the idea. Loki had never taken much interest in your personal life, outside of what you shared openly with your teammates. The fact that he was suddenly interested in hearing your singing voice – something you didn’t share with anyone, mind you – was flustering.

“Why is it so difficult for you to comprehend that someone may actually enjoy listening to your voice?”

“You can’t answer a question with another question.” Relieved when you saw the tower come into view, you turned to pull the car into the large garage, getting out of the car in hopes your arrival would end the conversation.

You should have known better. Loki is persistent.

“What is it that bothers you so much about the idea? Do you not like your own voice?” he asked, following you inside as you entered the tower lobby.

“No! I mean, I don’t hate it. It’s just… I… well…” You couldn’t even come up with a good explanation for it. “I guess I’m just… shy about it.”

Loki laughed heartily, causing you to spin around to look at him. “You? Shy? Brave, strong-willed, quick-witted agent, shy? I don’t buy that for a second.”

“It’s true!” You folded your arms defiantly across your chest. “Just because I’m confident in my job doesn’t mean I can’t be shy about other things.”

“I see. So, you are selectively shy.”

“Well… sure. That’s one way to put it, I guess. I just get… flustered, singing in front of people.” You turned back around and continued on your way, getting in the elevator that would bring you up to the common room. Loki joined you inside, standing beside you as you pressed the button for the third floor.

“Flustered.” He pondered for a moment. “What else makes you ‘flustered’, then?”

“Why on earth would I tell you?” you asked, laughing humorlessly. “And, also, why do you want to know?”

“Surely if I discover something you’re more shy about, I can use it as leverage to get you to sing for me.”

“Are you suggesting you want to blackmail me?”

“Hardly. That would suggest malicious intent. I merely want to… find a way to convince you.” He turned slightly to look at you, eyes boring into yours as if trying to see into your brain. You willed the elevator to hurry up so you could get out of the metal box that had you trapped with the God of Mischief who had suddenly taken an interest in your secrets.

“Well, I’m sorry to tell you that I’m not going to provide you with ‘leverage.’ That would be unwise of me.”

“No matter. My brother spent quite some time with his Midgardian lover. I’m certain I can identify something for myself, based on standard Midgardian responses. After all, many Midgardians are shy about their singing voice.”

You took a step sideways to add a bit of distance between you, breathing a sigh of relief when the elevator door opened, and you could exit to the common room. Wandering inside, you flopped down onto one of the armchairs, hoping to avoid having to sit right next to Loki.

“What makes you think I’m the same as a standard Midgardian?” you inquired, as Loki took a seat on the chair opposite you. He leaned back lazily in the seat, propping his chin on his hand with his elbow resting on the arm of the chair, observing you curiously.

“Oh, I’d never dream of making that assumption.” He smirked, eyes still fixed on you, reading your face. “However, I need to begin somewhere. You do share at least one common Midgardian trait.”

“Alright – what do you know of things that might fluster the ‘standard’ Midgardian?” You sat back casually as well, crossing your legs to try to look unconcerned.

“Let me think… many Midgardians are shy about dancing in front of people, which clearly is not something you are shy about based on our experience in the car…”

“Nope.” You shook your head, chuckling and motioning for him to continue.

“Others are flustered when someone compliments them. I would imagine that isn’t something you suffer from, seeing as I’ve seen you light up when Steve or Tony congratulates you on a job well done. Nor are you flustered by someone teasing you.”

“Nah. Not me.” You smirked. “You’re not getting very far with this strategy.”

“Hang on, I’m not finished.” He lifted his head from his hand, leaning back a bit more to lean against the back cushion of the armchair, a slight smirk of realization spreading across his lips. “Thor’s Midgardian maiden became exceptionally flustered when he discovered she was ticklish. Is that a trait you share as well?”

Taken aback, you weren’t sure how to respond. Not that it mattered – you had been around the block enough times to know that just the brief change of expression on your face when your brain fully registered what he was asking told him everything he needed to know.

Judging by the wicked smirk expanding across his face, you were in trouble.

You knew it was a fruitless endeavor, but you still had to try. You cleared your throat, trying to make your facial features appear relaxed.

“Nope, sorry Loki. Gonna have to keep guessing.”

“Hmm.” Loki suddenly leaned forward quickly in his seat, propping his elbows on his knees but remaining seated. You interpreted the sudden motion as a lunge for you and flinched, cursing under your breath when you realized he’d played you. “This should be entertaining.”

“L-Loki, you don’t want to do this…” You stood from your seat and stepped around to stand behind the chair, using it as a barrier between the pair of you.

“Oh, I really think I do.” He rose to his feet, standing tall and powerful while you ducked further behind the chair, nervous giggles threatening to bubble up in your throat.

“W-what if I agree to sing?”

“Assuming you were telling the truth – which you aren’t, by the way…” He chuckled at your indignant expression, gesturing proudly to himself. “God of Lies, darling. As I was saying, even if you were telling the truth, I’m sorry to tell you I’m quite curious now.” You let out a nervous whine, only serving to make his sinister smirk grow further. “It’s possible I would be willing to show you mercy if you choose to take that route.”

“Loki! Y-you can’t!”

“I’m not sure what would give you that idea. I’m more than capable of tickling you to tears.” You felt a rush of heat cross over your face. “In any case – you aren’t as terrified as you’re pretending to be. If anything, you seem… intrigued.”

“Wh-what?” The heat in your cheeks intensified.

“You heard me. Again – God of Lies.” He took an intimidating step towards you, and you stepped back to maintain the distance between you. “Would you like the opportunity to run?”

“Loki!!”

“I’ll give you until the count of three.”

You didn’t wait for him to tell you twice.

His voice faded as you sprinted out of the common room, running down the hallway toward the stairs. The elevator would be a terrible idea right now – even if he didn’t manage to get in with you before the door closed, which would be the worst-case scenario, he’d see what floor you got off and be able to track you. No, better to take the stairs.

Ripping the door to the stairwell open, you bounded up to the fifth floor and burst through the door into the hallway. The tower contained so many floors, you at least had the advantage of having many places to hide. You rushed down the corridor, glancing at the different doors as you ran to decide where would be best to hide.

“Boo.”

“AHH!” You skidded to a halt on your heels, seeing Loki standing in the hallway directly in front of you. How the hell had he gotten here so quickly?? Did he take the elevator? In any case, you spun around and ran back the way you came, diving through the door to the staircase and climbing the stairs up to the eighth floor.

You tried to keep your movements random to prevent him from predicting your path, exiting the staircase, and swiftly slipping inside a door into an empty administrative office. Slamming the door shut behind you, you turned and ducked underneath the large desk in the center of the room. He couldn’t possibly peek into each office and look under every desk – he’d be at it for hours.

Steadying your breath to try to remain quiet, you sat cross-legged on the floor and kept your ears open for any signs of movement outside the door. Nervously, you peeked around the leg of the desk to see the door, checking to ensure it had clicked fully shut when you closed it. The door was inset completely into the doorframe as intended. Satisfied, you pulled your head back around underneath the desk to sit more comfortably. However, something in the back of your mind gave you the sense that you were being watched. Turning around slowly, you found yourself face-to-face with Loki, just inches between your noses, a vast grin on his face.

“NO!” Heart leaping into your throat, you dove out from beneath the desk before he could reach for you, clambering to your feet and shoving the door back open to find yet another hiding place.

This time, instead of going up, you jogged down the staircase to the first floor. Maybe if you hid outside, he wouldn’t think to look there. You thanked yourself mentally for having done so much training running on an incline – you were certain you’d be completely winded by now if you hadn’t been prepared for this sort of chase.

It was about this point that you realized you also had an involuntary silly grin on your face that you couldn’t wipe off. Despite the fact that you knew your mischievous friend well, and you knew exactly how merciless he’d likely be if he caught you, this was sort of fun. You couldn’t recall the last time you’d run from someone or something that wasn’t trying to kill you. The last time you’d played around like this with someone. It was childish, but that was possibly the best part of it all, having an excuse to act so frivolous.

Finally reaching the first floor, you rushed through the door and burst into the lobby, making a beeline straight for the entrance. You only had a solid twenty feet left between you and the door handle when your mischievous partner suddenly appeared in front of you, blocking your path to the exit.

“W-what… H-how…” you stammered, screeching to a halt once again to avoid launching yourself straight into the arms of your pursuer.

Then, it dawned on you.

Loki couldn’t possibly be everywhere at once. Not the real, solid Loki, anyway. The sneaky god was using his clones. He’d been playing you.

The thing about Loki’s clones, though – they couldn’t actually touch you. In fact, if you made contact with one of them, it would immediately vanish. So, you decided to pretend you hadn’t figured out his little game.

“Alright… alright…” you huffed, pretending to be completely out of breath. “You win. I can’t keep running. D-do your worst.” You stepped forward, acting as if you were going to willingly offer yourself up to the Asgardian in front of you, who looked entirely too pleased with himself. When you stepped close enough, you suddenly lurched forward, reaching out with your hand to grab his ‘arm’ so he’d disappear.

The only thing was, he was solid.

Shit.

With a wicked gleam in his eyes, he swiftly grabbed hold of your outstretched wrist, merely standing there staring at you for a moment with a giant smirk on his face.

“You thought you had my little game all figured out, didn’t you?” he asked tauntingly, effortlessly maintaining his grip on your wrist despite your struggling.

“You HAD to be using clones! You HAD to!” you insisted indignantly.

“I was, clever agent. However, I would never leave a clone to guard the only exit to the tower. Surely you would eventually try to escape the building.” He chuckled malevolently. “You thought I would disappear when you touched my arm, didn’t you? That must have been quite an unfortunate surprise when you discovered I wasn’t an illusion.”

“Stop monologuing and get this over with,” you growled.

“Straight down to business. I like it.” In one swift motion, he tugged your arm and yanked your entire momentum toward himself, wrapping his arms around your waist and digging into your ribcage on both sides.

It had been an incredibly long time since anyone had dared try to tickle you. You knew you were sensitive, but you’d forgotten just how devastatingly ticklish you were until you experienced Loki’s deft fingertips dancing across your ribs. The god laughed evilly in your ear, clearly also taken aback by your sudden violent fight to free yourself. So much so, in fact, that with one hard twist of your torso, you broke free of his hold, immediately running for the door. You heard a playful growl of frustration from the prince of Asgard behind you, and you turned your head to check whether he was pursuing you once again, shocked to find he had vanished. You didn’t need to think long to figure out where he went, however, because you suddenly slammed full-on into something – or rather someone – very solid.

With a yelp, you tried to shift your momentum to run the other direction, but he wasn’t playing around any longer, bending to wrap an arm behind your knees and hoist you up over his shoulder. You could feel the vibration of his rumbling laugh in his chest as he carried you to the elevator. Protesting, you beat your fists against the back of his shoulder. He barely seemed to flinch.

Riding up the elevator, tossed helplessly over Loki’s shoulder, you began trying to plot your escape. You didn’t know where he planned to bring you, but he eventually had to put you down on solid ground, and when he did, you’d be ready. The best escape route, you knew, was to sprint to the back staircase and try to make your way down to the back door of the tower before he could catch you. Of course, the damned god could apparently teleport, so that sort of threw a wrench into –

“HEHEHEY!!” You squeaked as Loki suddenly began scribbling his fingers against the back of your thigh where his hand rested, stabilizing you.

“I thought I’d make the most of the trip upstairs,” he taunted, adding his other hand into the mix, kneading just above your hip where his arm was wrapped around your lower back to hold you securely in place over his shoulder. You flinched hard at the contact near your hip, flailing your legs hopelessly to try to distract from the incredibly ticklish sensation he was inflicting upon you. “Oh-ho! Did I discover a weak spot already? Dear me, you are in trouble.”

“L-LOHOHOKI NOHO, STOHOP TEASING!” you begged, already in hysterics. Thankfully, he stilled his fingers on your hip, instead sweeping the fingertips of his other hand across the back of your knee to keep you giggling.

“We’ll come back to that.” The elevator dinged, the doors rumbling as they rolled open.

“Noho, no! No going back to thahat!” Loki hiked you up further on his shoulder to keep you from slipping from your squirming, eliciting a surprised yelp. He laughed at your reaction, stepping out of the elevator, and carrying you down the hallway.

You realized he’d taken you to your own floor, making his way down the corridor and entering your bedroom. You huffed, pounding one fist against his back.

“You’re really going to torment me in my own room?”

“I could take you to the training room and tickle you in front of everyone else,” he suggested facetiously. You shut your mouth after that. “Need I remind you, all of this could have been avoided if you’d just simply sang for me when I asked so kindly. I wouldn’t even know of your little weakness.” He punctuated his taunt with a squeeze to your hip, causing you to drive your knee into his stomach. He acted as though he didn’t even feel it, shutting the door behind the pair of you and carrying you toward your bed.

Loki set your feet down on the ground to lift you off his shoulder, predicting your plot to escape and keeping one hand clasped around your wrist. Regardless, you weren’t going to not attempt to run. You spun on your heel and began to hurry toward the door, only for your momentum to be redirected backward as Loki tugged hard on your arm and dragged you down into his lap as he sat on the edge of the bed.

“Now then. We can do this one of two ways – stop squirming– I can offer you mercy, or you can be stubborn.”

“I will NOT stop squirming you asshole!” you shouted, redoubling your efforts to escape.

“I see you’ve decided on the latter option.” Wrapping his arms around your waist, he slid his hands down to rest on your hips, positioning his thumbs right by your hipbones. You stiffened, hands shooting out to grasp at his to try to tug them away from your waist.

“No, nonono, Loki we can talk about thihis, wahahahait!!”

“Begging already, agent?” Loki applied the slightest amount of pressure with his thumbs, digging tiny circles into your hipbones while you pleaded through your giggles. “Regretting your choice yet?”

“LohoKI NOho!” you cried, twisting as best you could in his hold as he began to scratch his fingers into your sides just above your hips. “Lehet me GOHOHO!”

“If you don’t stop squirming then I’ll have no choice but to pin you down.”

You gasped, kicking your feet out to try to reach the ground and gain some traction to run, but they barely grazed the floor. “DOHON’T YOU DAHAHARE!”

“Then – mmph – hold still – ugh- alright, that’s it!”

Suddenly, you were looking up at your ceiling as Loki threw his weight backwards onto the bed, dragging you along with him. Before you could try to scramble to escape his hold, he’d rolled to press your back to the mattress, grasping your wrists and pinning your hands beneath his knees on either side of your waist. You stared up at him with wide eyes, already giggling hysterically in anticipation of what you knew was to come.

You were pleased with yourself seeing that Loki was somewhat breathless after struggling to pin you down, despite the fact that he’d succeeded quite quickly. It didn’t seem to phase him, however, as his smirk quickly returned to his face. He rested his hands on your hips once again, his eyes fixed on your face to watch your every facial movement while he prepared to tickle you to pieces. Uselessly, you wished your weak spot was somewhere easier to conceal.

“It’s amazing how merely the sensation of my fingers resting motionless against your hips makes your eyes widen in fear,” Loki teased, relishing in the giggles he was drawing from your lips without even tickling you.

“Wahahait, Loki, wait… I-Ihi’ll sing instead, juhust leave my poor hips alohone!”

He leaned down closer to your face, smirk impossibly wider as he gazed upon your panicked expression. “Oh, you’ll sing, alright. I’ll make certain of it.”

With that, he dug in. And your mind went blank.

Not once in your life had you experienced someone tickling you as ruthlessly and as precisely as the God of Mischief. He rapidly identified the most effective way to torment you – first digging his thumbs into your hipbones, then squeezing his fingers into your sides above your hips, then fluttering his fingers right around your waistline. By far, the method that made you screech with laughter, however, was when he scratched all five fingers directly beside your hipbones. You wouldn’t call it gentle, but you wouldn’t call it digging in either – it was a maddening in-between pressure that had you howling and begging for mercy. And, after a few moments of pleading, he finally allowed you a reprieve.

“This is exceptionally entertaining,” he teased, grinning down at you as you desperately sucked oxygen into your lungs. “I only wish I’d known of this sooner.”

“Ihi… I hate you…” you gasped, glaring playfully up at your assailant.

“Strong words for someone in your position, darling.” He slid his hands up to your ribcage, watching your face for signs of panic. “Clearly I’ve already identified your weakest spot. I’m merely curious, now.”

“Hang on – didn’t you say you’d offer me mercy if I agreed to sing for you?” you demanded.

“Yes – but you were also lying when you said you would. I suspect you’re growing closer to being truthful when you say so, however.”

“I’m not lyHING!!” You burst into laughter again when his fingertips contracted into your ribcage, squeezing, and kneading their way into the spaces between the bones.

“I think a bit more persuasion should do the trick, don’t you?” His fingers crawled slowly up your ribs, working their way up under your arms as you shouted threats and curses at him through your laughter. Nothing was as terrible as the feeling of his fingertips at your hips, but this was a pretty close second.

Still, despite the fact that your nerves were on fire with ticklish shockwaves with every pass of his fingers over the sensitive skin, you found that you were actually having fun with this playful, albeit ruthless side of your partner. Above all else, he seemed to have completely forgotten about the conversation he’d had with his brother that morning, and that was enough to make you willing to endure this torment for a bit longer. Although, you weren’t certain how much more you could take without exploding.

With a few more squeezes into your upper ribs, Loki stilled his fingers once again to allow you to breathe. Even his smirk didn’t seem quite so evil anymore – he was enjoying the fact that he could destroy your calm composure with just a fluttering of his fingers.

“Doho… do you believe me yehet that I prohomise I’ll sing for you?” you asked sweetly. In all honesty, you did mean it this time. If you could grow comfortable laughing with abandon in front of Loki as he exploited every inch of ticklish skin he could find, singing a song for him would be a piece of cake. If you could breathe after this was over, of course.

Loki observed your face for a moment, scrutinizing your expression. “Hmm… alright. Here is my offer.”

“Oh, wonderful,” you said sarcastically, rolling your eyes. With a growl, he dug his fingers briefly into your upper ribs as punishment for your sarcasm.

“If you promise to sing something for me – honestly, because I can tell if you’re lying – then I’ll release you.”

“And if I don’t?”

“Allow me to show you.” Loki’s hands darted straight back down to your hips, scratching into the soft skin beside the bones with infuriating precision. You threw your head back and laughed, voice growing hoarse from overuse.

“Oho… ohoKAHAHAY!!! IHI PROHOHOMISE!”

At last, he removed his hands from your hips, releasing your hands and allowing you to sit up. You grasped your stomach where your abdominal muscles ached from laughing so hard. Despite the soreness, you were content. And, with a glance at your companion, you knew Loki was as well.

“Well? I’m listening,” he urged, gazing intensely at you.

“Gihive me a second! I’m still trying to cahatch my breath from your evil attack,” you retorted teasingly. Gradually, your breaths slowed to a normal rate as you came down from your intense, euphoric state. With one last deep breath, you sat up a bit straighter and looked Loki in the eye. Then, you began to sing.

The song you selected was intentional. The lyrics were about forgiveness – forgiving others for their transgressions, and more importantly, forgiving yourself for your own faults. Your voice was soft initially but watching Loki’s expression change from surprise to a soft smile gave you the confidence you needed to pour your emotions into the melody. Without speaking the words, you were telling him he was worthy of forgiveness for his past. He’d never listen to you if you told him so, but it seemed his mind was accepting of the sentiment when you expressed it in a song, as his eyes glistened a bit with emotion as he listened.

When you finished the song, you offered him a small, shy smile. Loki reached out and grasped your hand in his, squeezing it tightly.

“Thank you. That was absolutely beautiful.”

“You’re very welcome.”

You didn’t say anything more about the lyrics to the song you’d chosen. There was no need. The look in his eyes as you sang the words to him that you couldn’t speak told you all you needed to know.

“I’m afraid I must be going,” Loki lamented, standing up from your bed and taking a few steps backward toward your door. “I… need to speak with my brother.”

You nodded at him approvingly, smiling. “Go on. I’ll see you later.”

Loki opened the door to your room, turning to offer you an appreciative smile. He winked, chuckling softly.

“I hope you realize – I’m not going to forget this little fact about you.”

“I had no doubt. If you’re not careful, I’ll… what did you call it? ‘Holler’ and dance every time we’re in the car together. No matter how much it annoys you.”

“Go ahead. See where that gets you.” With that, he ducked out of your room and shut the door behind him. You laughed softly to yourself, shaking your head.

You’d never know exactly what Loki spoke to his brother about that evening. All you knew was the next time you saw the pair of them, Thor had his arm draped across Loki’s shoulders, the pair of them laughing heartily at something Thor had said. It made your heart swell to see them getting along again. You only hoped that, over time, Loki would learn to forgive himself the way everyone around him had learned to do.

#ticklish!reader #tickle fluff #loki tickle #tickle fic #marvel tickle #lee!reader #ler!loki #loki x reader #loki x gender neutral reader #sfw tickle fluff

234 notes · View notes

lepusrufus · 3 years ago

Text

To bargain for immortality pt.1

It's here fellas, the mutation sequel that I've mercilessly teased you with!

Content warnings: gore, torture, blood (like... lots), just a bunch of puking up blood, Miranda being her usual mad scientist self, torture in the name of science, Nicole be sick af (both literally and of crow mommy's bullshit), a little bit of blood drinking as a treat, medical procedures.

////

Tic toc tic toc

God that clock is so annoying.

Nicole wasn’t nervous. No. She chose this, at least for the most part. She had a long conversation with all her family, Alcina and Esteria both assuring her that it would work. It’s been years since the beginning of the experiments and by this point the process was almost perfected.

Miranda knew what she was doing.

That mattered little to her nerves though.

She instinctively pushed herself further into Cassandra’s side, who’s grip around her waist tightened ever so slightly.

The waiting was downright tortuous.

She, along with Cassandra and her two sisters were in her infirmary. The room mixed the ancient decor of the castle with modern medical equipment in a beautiful way. Not that anything less would be acceptable. Not that the familiarity of her workspace brought her any comfort either.

All their eyes snapped in the direction of the door when a heavy set of footsteps, with two lighter ones, were heard down the hallway outside. Soon the door opened with a barely audible creak and the two matriarchs entered, followed suit by Mother Miranda. Her presence alone was enough to make Nicole’s breath get lost somewhere in her throat, on its way to an exhale. The black wings, even partially folded as they were, did their job of making her look so much more intimidating than she was. Not that she needed them to begin with, a look from those icy gray eyes more than enough to send anyone to their knees.

Mother Miranda was, in all ways that mattered, a goddess.

A goddess that was about to infect her with the same thing that failed countless times in the past. The same thing that made the crawling mindless beasts used as guard dogs in the undergrounds. Or that made all the lycans.

Nicole gulped, a gesture gone thankfully unnoticed to anyone other than her painfully dry mouth.

But Miranda didn’t spare her a glance. She simply busied herself with some tools she had brought on one of the metal tables. With each clink the room seemed to close in on her slightly more, until Nicole felt as if she somehow ended up in one of Heisenberg's death traps. Spikes moving closer and closer until they would pierce her body and leave her in a messy pool of blood and entrails.

She shook her head and took a long inhale. No. This was going to work. She was not about to lose her family over a pesky thing such as mortality. She was not about to lose Cassandra. If getting infected by the Cadou was what it took to spend eternity with her lover then so be it. Possible side effects be damned.

Mother Miranda finally seemed to have finished, a now empty flask labeled Cadou sitting on the desk behind her while the parasite was writhing in her hand, thin whip-like tentacles extending frantically around itself. She called her over with a nod, and with a deep breath and a parting hand squeeze from Cassandra, Nicole forced her legs to take her across the room. Her steps didn't waver, she'd be damned if she'd show any hesitancy in front of this.

"Shall we begin."

It wasn't a question really, merely veiled impatience. Miranda did not like her, plain and simple. The fact that she was there to begin with was already a miracle. Miracle that wouldn't have happened were it not for the Ladies themselves asking for it.

"Yes of c-"

Before her words even had time to completely slip out of her mouth, golden talons plunged into the base of her sternum.

"Hopefully this can teach you that I don't like people going behind my back."

Nicole let out a choked gasp, hands instinctively wrapping around Miranda's arm, weakly grabbing at black robes. Ironically enough, those very talons were keeping her upright and, when they were removed from her flesh with a disgusting squelch of blood, Nicole curled in on herself, falling to her knees.

"Wha-... cking ki-... -er!"

Cassandra's voice reached her ears broken up, barely passing through the deafening ringing. Miranda also gave a reply and then seemed to address someone else but her much calmer tone meant that it only sounded like a vague mumble.

Not that Nicole particularly cared at the moment.

She curled into a ball, her hands almost clawing at her chest trying to find some sort of relief. It seemed as if vicious tendrils were making their way into every vein and muscle, tearing their way through any tissue they found. Her chest felt as if it had a hot iron pressed directly onto the skin, searing pain radiating in a cruel pulse matching her frantic heartbeat. By that point she was either sobbing or heaving, something that involved shallow breaths for sure. Her lungs were protesting fiercely, emptying of oxygen and then refusing to refill if not with great strain.

To make everything worse, the pain seemed to shift, now engulfing her spine and sending jolts that made her head spin and want to throw up despite her jaws being clenched shut so tightly that she was sure she'd start to taste copper soon.

She was only vaguely aware of hands shifting her body and soothing words that fell on deaf ears. She was now on a softer surface, but that did nothing to alleviate the assault on each of her senses. Probably she had thrown up at a certain point as her sinuses felt like being scraped by sandpaper with each shuddering breath. Her mouth too had a lingering taste of both bile and blood that made her stomach turn all over again. She would give anything for her body to finally shut down.

Why was she still awake and conscious god damn it. There was only so much her body was supposed to take before the brain shut down and she was reaching her limit of how much agony she could endure at a moment.

Please please please just pass out please.

She didn't though. Her body seemingly deciding to feel every single bit of the infection process, complete with the unending waves of pain and nausea that hit her more than she wanted to count. Any bit of sanity left in her would've probably disappeared had she tried.

---

It took two days for the agonizing pain to subside. Another two for Nicole to be able to form any kind of coherent sentence. Cassandra's soothing voice was of immense comfort, always there to tell her how well she was doing and how it would all be better soon.

God she hoped.

On the fifth day, her stomach still lurched at any movement too sudden. Her lungs seemed to fill with blood, courtesy of the still gaping wound at the bottom of her sternum, with any inhale too deep. The fact that she got used to the coppery taste rising up in her throat was disgusting in and of itself. At least there weren't jolts of pain shooting through every nerve and muscle in waves anymore though. That was something.

The fog in her brain was still clearing. It was hard to focus on anything, and each time Cassandra, or anyone else, asked her a question they would have to repeat it at least three times. It was beyond frustrating, the mind that got her through med school drunk half the time was failing the insurmountable task of saying whether or not she'd like some water. Glorious.

A faint knock on the door reached her ears. A redundant gesture really, as she didn't exactly have the clarity of mind to answer. Besides it was hard to catch her in a more compromising state than curled up in the fetal position, covered in sweat and most likely blood clots stuck to her lips.

Esteria came in, her one blue eye that wasn't covered looking at her with all the gentleness neither of her parents had ever offered her. Or it was just the cruel trick of a delirious brain. Either way, light barefoot steps took the Mistress to her bed. She sat in the chair adjacent to it and, with taloned fingers brushing strands of auburn hair out of Nicole's face, she spoke softly.

"How are you feeling today?"

Her voice was just as melodious as ever. It was the voice one imagines they would hear from an ancient being found deep in the forest. It made Nicole just a tad guilty when the only answer she could give was a pathetic whine.

Esteria simply hummed, talons running through the long messy locks of hair sprawled on the sheets.

"Would you like me to braid this for you dear?"

Nicole frowned. The Mistress was an expert at braiding, quick fingers able to make beautiful designs, both simple and complex. Comes with having floor length hair, her hazy mind guessed. On any normal day, Nicole would've accepted without a second thought. But now? Now she was painfully aware of the state she was currently in.

"It's filthy," she croaked, her voice raw and like stones in her mouth.

And it was. Her hair was waist length and right now it was slowly becoming a curse. It was greasy and sweaty thanks to barely being able to move a limb for nearly a week, which meant no showers. Not to mention how she lost count of the times she bent down to empty the contents of her stomach into a bucket, only to have some rebel locks fall in her face and get subsequently dirty. God she felt awful.

Esteria didn't seem to care too much though, as she simply helped Nicole shift slightly and talons started to work at some pesky mats. In no time, her hair was in a comfortable braid that started relatively high, keeping the locks away from her nape which meant just a tad less overheating. Not to mention it kept it in place and away from her mouth that she didn't trust in the slightest right now.

"Thanks," she actually managed to not let her voice crack this time.

"Oh it's no problem. Also," there seemed to be an odd strain in her voice, "Mother Miranda is coming this evening. She said something about an examination."

Nicole couldn't help but openly wince and curl in on herself a little more at the mere mention of the woman. Her chest seemed to pulsate painfully at the memory of the golden talons embedded deep in her flesh. Right now she wanted those hands anywhere away from her.

"What time is it?"

Esteria looked at the clock placed somewhere on the wall behind them. "About twelve. Still got time."

How hard would it be to drag herself to the adjacent bathroom for a quick shower? The only way her situation could get worse was if none other than Mother Miranda came in to see her in that state. She took a deep breath that her lungs protested against and pushed herself onto her elbows. At Esteria's skeptical expression she tried to sound less horrible than she felt.

"I need a shower."

Esteria pursed her lips. "Sorry dear but I don't believe for one second that you can stand for more than a minute. I'll ask a maid to draw you a bath."

Nicole only nodded weakly and let herself fall back into the cushion.

---

It took far longer than Nicole would ever admit to get herself fully clean. Her muscles were sore and protesting at every pass of the soapy sponge. Her hair was a whole other battle and she had to bite down on her pride and ask the maid positioned outside her door for help. It was a tortuous fifteen minutes until the poor girl managed to detangle the long locks enough to be shampooed and washed.

After she was content with the level of cleanliness of her body and the maid was dismissed, she stood there preparing herself to get out of the basin. In the meantime she looked down at the wound at the bottom of her sternum. Maybe wound wasn't the right word. It looked more like a gray and black scar with vein-like tendrils spreading across pale skin. It looked downright gruesome. Miranda really did not try to do a clean job in the slightest. Didn't even think to use anesthesia, like she had with most other experiments, according to Alcina.

She sighed and finally pushed herself out of the water with shaky arms.

By the time Mother Miranda arrived she was feeling slightly better. Why she came personally was still a mystery to Nicole. Maybe some sick sense of satisfaction in seeing her in pain.

Either way, by the time their so-called goddess came into the infirmary and told Nicole to lay down on one of the tables, she managed to shuffle her way over without her body protesting too much. Cassandra also quietly made her way on the opposite side of Miranda, gaining herself a glare.

"Must you hover over her like that?" Miranda's tone was as even as ever, but her eyes betrayed annoyance.

"Does it hinder you?"

Cassandra was not an idiot, the growl she wanted to add into her question was instead replaced by a tone not too dissimilar to Miranda's own, who simply tugged her lips into a grimace.

"Very well."

At first they went through a normal examination. Pupil dilation, reflexes, all things a normal doctor would do. Then Miranda told her to unbutton her blouse so she could take a look at the infection scar.

Nicole couldn't help flinching when thankfully gloved fingers would poke and prod at the sensitive flesh there. Her cold digits felt like hot coals were spread on her chest and nails dragged uselessly on the metal underneath her body for some sort of distraction.

Mother Miranda decided to get a tissue sample and that's when Nicole decided that maybe she would rather spend eternity as a ghost. She squeezed her eyes shut when a scalpel was brought to the overly sensitive skin. It took her back to when she would do autopsies, years ago. Tissue samples were always an integral part of her work. How ironic that she found herself on the other side of things.

It's fine.

She winced when the blade cut into flesh and sent a jolt of pain through her chest. Nicole couldn't help but think of the long days she spent agonizing while her chest felt like it was burning her alive and hoping that it wouldn't repeat. A sigh of pure relief slipped past her lips when whatever fake deity there was besides this woman, listened to her and the sensation died out quickly. She dared to open her eyes, only to see Mother Miranda frowning down at the small vial in hand.

It was quickly given to an assistant and she unceremoniously grabbed Nicole's wrist, dragging the blade across the length of her forearm.

Nicole gasped at the sudden sharp pain, and even Cassandra dropped a few choice words in romanian due to the surprise. No. No no no. What the hell-

Any questions, or less dignified reaction, died in everyone's throats as they watched the skin stitch itself back together. The repairing muscles gave a tingling sensation but soon the only proof that a cut had been there were thin trails of blood.

Mother Miranda chuckled and wrote down something in the notebook she brought with her. "Accelerated healing. That can be of use."

Nicole couldn't help but throw a glance at Alcina, who was sitting in one of the many chairs with Esteria by her side. Her expression was unreadable, a mix of conflicting emotions flashing in her eyes like rapid lightning. She would've tried to decipher their matriarch's probable thoughts were it not for the smell that was starting to assault her senses.

"Ugh what's that…blood… "

Coherent sentences were still not something her brain wanted to do apparently, but judging by how her nose scrunched up in a grimace, Cassandra got the gist of what she meant.

"Um… your arm," she pointed to the still fresh blood slowly dripping from her skin.

Right. Dumbass.

"Or damaged sinuses. Should go away soon," Miranda added from where she was noting something down and giving instructions to her assistant.

Also fair.

She sighed and tried to ignore it. Her sinuses still felt like sandpaper all the way to the back of her throat. Every time she swallowed, it felt like needles scraping the inside of her neck down to her stomach.

Ugh.

Thankfully, Mother Miranda did not linger for much longer. She wrapped up any samples and was out of the room soon after with her assistant in tow. Then, Nicole could finally go back to laying down in bed and feeling miserable.

And miserable she felt. Her body seemed to have decided to rewire itself into its new mutation. It didn't have any effect on her physical appearance, but the insides seemed to want to liquefy only to be mended back together. It was another week of basically living with a bucket in her lap and throwing up blood clots that seemed to invade her lungs and organs. How she didn't straight up asphyxiate was a mystery that she didn't think she wanted solved.

And to top it off, she was starting to think that humidity from some leaky pipe somewhere in the castle was causing a slight mold problem. Almost everywhere she went, there was this faint moldy scent lingering in the air and it was mixing horribly with the coppery feeling inside her still offended throat and sinuses. Nobody seemed bothered by it though, so maybe it was simply a side effect of the infection that was yet to go away. It wasn’t nicknamed the Mold for nothing, after all.

#unhinged maiden™ my beloved #cassandra dimitrescu x maiden #lady dimitrescu #lady dimitrescu x maiden #momma esteria #mother miranda #fanfic #tw: gore #to bargain for immortality #in which nicole gets way too familiar with miranda's petty side

161 notes · View notes

latte-fairytaekwoon · 3 years ago

Text

Kickstart My Heart Pt.1 (Racer! Yeosang)

Next>>

Pairing: Racer! Kang Yeosang × Waitress/Fuckgirl! Reader (Female)

Genre: Fluff, Angst, 80s AU.

Summary: During an era known for its vibrant colors, eccentric fashion styles and rise of new yet unconventional genres of music, the young generation of that time was infamously known for their need to rebel and live their lives rather scandalously and Y/N is no exception. So when a new and attractive man moves into her town, she has her eyes set on making him her next boy toy.

Word Count: 4K+

Warnings: Dumb attempts at crackhead humor, reader is a cold hearted bitch, guy gets dumped in public, reader's friend is lowkey creepy.

█ █ ▇ ▆ ▅ ▄ ▃ ▂▂ ▃ ▄ ▅ ▆ ▇ █ █

Throwing on the last article of clothing that had been discarded the night before, the young woman shook out her hair, still damp from the quick shower she just took. Picking up her bag, she looked over at the figure still sleeping soundly, the subtle hint of a smile on his face. With a pitied pout on her lips, she walked over to the edge where his face was. Taking out the lipstick tube from her bag, she applied it all over her lips, painting them in the dark burgundy color that she fancied so much and had practically become her signature hue. Bending over, she pressed her lips against the corners of his mouth, giving him the faintest whisper of a kiss before pulling away. A satisfied smirk was plastered on her pretty features as she stared at the lipstick mark on his face, the only memoir she'd leave him with as she had done with countless others.

Closing the front door behind her, she pulled her denim jacket tighter on her body, shivering slightly from the early dawn's breeze that blew across. It was always like that even though summer had just begun, the early morning hours still feeling obnoxiously cool and then transpiring into slightly uncomfortably warm afternoons that had more than one soul in that quaint town grumbling and fussing about the weather. But oh did the evenings feel absolutely refreshing, and that's when everything would start bustling to life.

Having finally made it out of that small residential area and finding one of the main roads that helped her locate where to go, she started heading south towards the all too familiar diner where she had been working in ever since her school days, first starting part time and eventually transpiring to full time when it came time for her to spread her wings and fly out on her own, a feat she had been most anxious to do to get away from the overly controlling nature of her parents. She knew they cared about her, but she herself cared very little about the morals and principles they had raised her with, a common trait all the young people in that town shared: their rebellious and headstrong nature to not conform and go against everything they had been taught thus far. Live their own lives as freely as they chose to do.

And she definitely lived as she wanted to, even if it ended up with a rather bad reputation and ugly labels that rather than infuriate her, she openly embraced, as others had come to as well.

The light twinkle of the bells above the glass door let the person at the register know someone came in and they immediately plastered on their business smile, which quickly faded when they saw who it was.

"You're late Y/N." The minuscule raven haired waitress informed her, eyes never leaving her coworker's figure that came behind the counter and started punching in her number.

"Only by like 7 minutes." She waved her slip at the nonchalant looking girl before placing it back in its respective slot.

"One day it wouldn't surprise me if you just didn't show up because you got too caught up in.... something else."

Chuckling softly, Y/N walked up behind her coworker, hands coming up to ruffle the cheekbone level bob cut hair framing her unusually small face.

"Awww come on Lynn, you know I'd never leave you hanging here to attend customers by yourself. You're my bestie." Y/N assured her, playfully poking her lips out as she tried to place a kiss on her friend, the poor girl craning her neck away as she tended to dislike physical affection.

"I will squirt ketchup on you." Lynn threatened as she picked up the cherry red bottle as a last resort to get her attacker to back away. A rather noisy struggle ensued between both girls, catching the attention of the owner and cook behind the two doors, prompting her to come out and see what was the cause of such ruckus.

"Well I'll be darned. I don't remember paying you youngsters to simply slack off and behave like the hooligans you are." The middle aged woman spoke up, her thick accent becoming more prominent. Although she had a stern look and hands placed at her hips, the girls knew she was not in reality angry at them.

Looking over at the recently arrived girl, the owner closed her eyes and sighed deeply when she took in the attire she was wearing: low cut white tank, ripped denim shorts that left little to the imagination if she bent down, fishnet tights with a few holes in them, and her beloved denim jacket that was almost always on Y/N's body.

"I swear to god, Y/N , everytime I see you wear them rags you call clothes, I feel like my body is about to collapse. Why must you insist on dressing like a common street worker?"

Y/N wasn't at all offended by her words, having grown used to and becoming fond of her boss's abrupt, direct and honest manner of speaking.

"Gotta start looking the part if I'm going to dedicate my life to the occupation." She giggled at her own joke, resulting in the older woman taking the rag off her apron and smacking her with it.

"This little runt, talking nonsense like that- get your ass back in there and change into your uniform. Can't have you prancing around here in those skimpy clothes and have all these men that come here say disrespectful things about you. Nuh uh, not to my girls." She shook her head.

"Yes Miss Audrey." Complying with the woman's wishes, she pushed open the swing doors leading to the back and quickly made her way to the corner where all the employee's cubicles were located. Grabbing the necessary items, she turned and went inside the bathroom to change into her uniform, consisting of a knee length crimson red dress, which she had actually altered so it would be shorter and display her thighs more, the cap sleeves slightly puffed up and the torso part had a trail of white buttons going all the way up to the modest v-neckline, usually most buttons were left undone so her cleavage would shamelessly peak out. Exchanging her black Doc Martens in favor of her white Nike sneakers, Y/N tied her apron around her waist, making sure it was as tight as possible so it would accentuate her curves and give her body a more flattering appearance. As she made her way out, she quickly piled her hair up before securing it with one of the many elastics she kept around her wrists, leaving out a few tendrils to fall on her temples.

Coming back out to start her daily work, she stood in front of Lynn, who merely spared her an unamused glance.

"How do I look?" Y/N asked.

"Like a total slut." Her friend answered in her usually rude way.

Rolling her eyes, Y/N grabbed a spray bottle and a rag. Making her way over to the table that had just finished being used, she quickly picked up the plates and glass, bringing them back over to where Lynn was, who took them so she could wash them in the sink. Spraying the top of the marble piece, she had began her task of wiping down the table when the ringing of the bell signaled new customers had arrived, and rowdy ones at that too.

"Damn! Is today's special fluffy sponge cake? Cause I would sure love a piece of that ass."

Y/N recognized that annoying voice even from miles away, belonging to none other than one of her old classmates, Jung Wooyoung, whom she considered a friend, if he didn't manage to irk her too much. Turning around, she of course wasn't surprised to see him surrounded by his crew of equally idiotic and adrenaline junkie friends, whom she had to admit were pleasant and fun to hang out with.

"Sit your asses down already, I'll be over in a minute to take your order." She told them before resuming her previous task, earning a scoff from the most dramatic of the group.

"Fine customer service! Don't think you'll be getting a tip from me." His words made her nearly burst into a fit of giggles.

"Wooyoung please, you never ever tip whenever you come. None of you, except Yunho." It kinda saddened her that said male unfortunately wasn't there with them at the moment.

"He doesn't tip you, he tips short stack over there." His friend with cat like eyes pointed towards Lynn, who upon overhearing him held up a rather explicit finger in his direction.

"I'll poison your food San." She threatened with a sing song tone.

"Like I wouldn't know that you already spit on it." San spat back, sticking his tongue out in his immature and infantile fashion.

"Can you guys hurry up and order already? I'm starving and we gotta head to the tracks as early as possible." The fiery red haired male known as Song Mingi blurted out, fingers tapping impatiently against the top of the table.

"If little miss g-string would care to hop her luscious ass over here, maybe we could."

Strutting over to where they sat, Y/N harshly threw the dirty rag on Wooyoung's face, causing a faint grunt to come out of his mouth.

"No matter how many times you mention my ass, I'm still not letting you tap it." She firmly stated, making Wooyoung slightly purse his lips outwards in a disappointed grimace.

"So anygays-" Mingi began.

"Umm I think you mean anyways." San corrected him.

Leaning in towards him, Mingi locked eyes on the shorter male and stared him down with an intimidating glare.

"Did I stutter Choi?"

San immediately shook his head rapidly. With a victory smile, Mingi reclined back in his seat.

"I'm just going to get the breakfast platter with some orange juice."

Y/N couldn't stifle her snort when he said his choice of drink, the other two men looking away in embarrassment.

"You've been drinking orange juice since you were in grade school Mingles, don't you think you outta start taking something more grown up? Like coffee?" San suggested and Mingi did not appreciate it.

"Coming from the one who still brings a plushie to sleep with him, your suggestion holds no value or power." He retorted.

"OK SHIBER IS NOT A PLUSHIE, HE'S FAMILY YOU JACKASS!" San sprinted up from his seat, nearly leaning across to grab Mingi by the color, but he was held back by Wooyoung.

Lynn, who had thus far stayed quiet, promptly came up with a spray bottle and consequently doused the untamed boy on his face.

"Bad kitty, bad kitty." She reprimanded him, unable to resist the opportunity to attack her long time frenemy.

"Lynn!" Y/N looked at her with surprise.

"You're welcome." Lynn replied rather monotone before going back to her place behind the counter like she didn't just spray San with disinfecting water.

"There's too many germs going around anyways..." She muttered under her breath.

Without any further interruptions, aside from the rumbling coming out of the boys' stomachs, they finished ordering what they wanted and Y/N sent it over so they could be prepared. Not wanting to be near their loud asses, Y/N went back over to where Lynn was, peeking over to see what she was currently reading in the magazine she held.

"What you reading?" She casually inquired.

"Horoscope section." Y/N wasn't surprised, her friend tended to be into more mystical, eccentric and rather.....extreme with her taste in fashion and music. If Y/N was the one who turned heads for her scandalous attire, Lynn was the one people turned away from in fear when they saw how she dressed. It was a sight that truly made both of them laugh at people's foolishness, well at least made Y/N laugh. Her friend rarely had any other expression plastered on that wasn't utter disdain for society and life.

Unexpectedly, another customer came in. Both girls looked at each other in confusion when neither of them recognized him. Their town was rather small with few people living there, so they deduced that he must be a traveler who probably got lost on his route. He himself looked around nervously, eyes barely lifting up. Y/N couldn't help herself as she took in his perfect face. Big, round eyes with crystal clear orbs, small face with a V-line jaw, perfectly sculpted nose with no sign of defects, skin smooth and blemish free, he looked like a prince out of a fairytale. He was incredibly pretty, yet stood there so awkwardly that it was almost comical.

"Hey Yeosang! You made it! Sit down! I ordered for you in advanced!" Wooyoung surprised both girls when it seemed he knew the stranger and even waved him over to where they sat. The other two boys also seem familiarized with him and welcomed him to sit with them, chatting up a storm already with him.

"Who's that?" Lynn was the one to finally ask out loud.

"Beats me.....but he sure is adorable."

Noticing the way her lips curled upwards, Lynn could already see the wheels inside Y/N's head turning.

"And I bet you're going to go over there and find out- aaand there you go." She ended up answering her own deduction as she watched Y/N happily walked over with a more bright expression on her face, that soon soured when her boss came out of the kitchen and beat her over to the table, laying down several plates of food.

"I knew as soon as I saw the orders that it had to be the lot of you." She scoffed softly as she looked at the boys' grinning faces.

"You know us Miss Audrey, we wouldn't ever think of eating anywhere else but here. You're the best cook in all of town." Wooyoung praised her with a sparkling charm that could have fooled anyone else but not the robust woman in front of him.

"Boy stop trying to tickle my ears, I've known you since you were in your soiled diapers being carried around by your mama, running around and creating chaos anywhere you went. Flattery may work on them poor girls you play with but me? I can see right through ruffians like you."

Turning her head to finally notice the new addition to the group, she looked him up and down.

"Boy who might you be?" She questioned him, earning the ears of the girls nearby to listen in for any valuable information.

"I'm..... Yeosang Kang, nice to meet you." He introduced himself, tilting his head slightly down when he said that.

"He just moved into town this week! He's the new guy who is going to work with us down at the car shop and help on the race track!" San enthusiastically shouted, making the older woman cringe.

"I may be old, but I still haven't gone deaf for you to yell in such a way boy. So...." She crossed her arms and looked at Yeosang again.

"You a racer too?"

Now the girls, particularly Y/N, were more interested in what his response would be.

"I- yes. So it seems." The poor boy looked so flustered, obviously being more of a soft spoken individual, contrasting starkly to the other 3 boys.

Miss Audrey let out a seemingly displeased hum at his answer.

"As if we needed anymore hooligans running wild. We already got enough with the 3 Stooges over here."

The girls couldn't help but snicker at their boss's words, always having a blast whenever she put the boys back in their place. They however looked displeased, glaring at them intensely.

"Shouldn't you both be off somewhere cleaning dishes or making sandwiches?"

Snatching one of the knifes, Lynn held it up and was about to jump over, but Y/N came up in front of her.

"Lynn, no. Just calm down ok? You know they're just being idiots." Y/N reminded her.

Grumbling something in a foreign language no one knew for sure if it was real or not, Lynn put the knife back, squinting her eyes at them before turning around to not look at them again. Y/N giggled softly, finding it absolutely cute whenever her friend lost her cool and collected form cause it reminded her of a chihuahua, barking and yelping at anything larger than itself trying to establish dominance.

Noticing that in her display of aggression, Lynn had inadvertently knocked over a few of the brochures that were on display for people to take, Y/N stooped down and proceeded to pick them up in a casual manner. Standing up, she neatly arranged them properly, making sure they all faced the same direction and the sides weren't poking out anywhere. Feeling as though someone had been watching her all along, she looked at the table of boys, half expecting Wooyoung's smug grin to greet her, but she was completely wrong as it was none other than the new guy who seemed unable to keep his eyes off her figure, staring intently at the length of her skirt. When he realized she noticed, his eyes went wide, cheeks burning up with utter embarrassment. Y/N however seemed unbothered by this. Wanting to test something, she pretended to accidentally drop one of the pamphlets. Bending over, she made sure he could get a perfect glimpse of her cleavage, if he payed enough attention, he'd be able to see that she was in fact, not wearing any bra. Coming back up, Y/N looked over to see the results, smirking when the agape mouth of Yeosang confirmed to her that he had indeed noticed everything.

"Oh sweetheart, you're gonna be too easy..." She had already made up in her mind that Yeosang would be her next target, and she had to put her plan in action. Placing the brochures down, she was about to go over and start flirting with him, until a familiar voice called for her.

"Y/N! There you are!"

She internally groaned when she heard him, wondering why on earth did he not get the hint of ditching him like that, especially when he very well knew about the reputation she had. She tried ignoring him, but of course, he had had to be the persistent type, no doubt thinking he was going to have a different ending than the rest before him.

"I thought you'd be here. You could have told me you were going to be gone early. I would have made you breakfast."

Knowing she had to say something, Y/N grabbed her pad and gave him the fakest smile she was capable of donning.

"Hi, what can we get started for you today? Waffles? Eggs and bacon? Coffee to start off with?"

The trio of friends, having no choice but to witness the interaction due to it happening right in front of them, snickered amongst themselves.

"Oh shit. He's in for it." San whispered lowly.

The boy obviously looked extremely confused, his smile lightly falling off, but then returning to its hopeful state.

"Why are you acting like this candy bear? Pretending like you don't know me?" When he tried to reach a hand to pull her close, the girl simply pushed him away with one of her fingers.

"Look, clearly you're too stupid to understand so let me spell it out in a language you can understand." Letting out a tired sigh, she crossed her arms in front of her chest, a sour look displaying on her pretty face.

"We had a nice time together, and last night was... average to put it nicely."

"Oh man. That was a total burn." Mingi couldn't help but snort, some of the orange juice being spit back into his glass.

"But that was all it was and all it's ever going to be. So why don't you do yourself a favor and just go back home to your Star Trek figurines and watch the latest episode of Thunder Cats?"

The not so discreet snickering coming from the table behind them only made the humiliation for the man multiply significantly. Turning red with utter despair and rage, he quickly brushed past Y/N rather brusquely.

"Fucking bitch." She heard him mutter under his breath, a phrase she had grown accustomed to hearing among many others.

"Oh god. Homegirl struck again." Wooyoung laughed, swirling his milkshake in his hand.

"Ayo why you gotta do Thunder Cats like that? It's actually pretty entertaining." San commented.

Looking over at the time, the guys quickly stood up, dropping their share of bills onto the table.

"You guys get paid today too right? Come meet up with us at the track." Wooyoung suggested.

"Why on earth would we want to go see your greasy, oil smelling ass after dealing for nearly an hour with you already?" Lynn questioned him, eyes never peering up from her magazine.

"Because Yunho would be there?"

Still she didn't respond, the only movement made was her finger turning the page.

"Bro we been knew she don't give two shits about him." Mingi reminded them.

"Because we're going to the drive in theater after work, they're playing a horror movie."

Lifting her gaze, Lynn closed the magazine, although still stone faced, her eyes seemed to brighten up.

"My interest has been greatly piqued." Her lips showed the faintest whisper of a smile that gave a rather eerie and chilling feel down the people's spines.

"Maybe we should rethink inviting Satan's offspring." San leaned in towards Mingi, shivering significantly.

"Great! So we'll catch you gals later."

The boys quickly dispersed themselves, save Yeosang who still sat quietly, keeping mostly to himself. His fingers fidgeted with the half drunk cup he was holding, gaze fixed on the table in front of him. Looking up, he was attempting to work up the courage to talk to Y/N, but before he could even get the chance to gather strength, the owner came out from the back, whispering a few orders to her and gesturing for her to go tend to a situation in the kitchen. With a defeated sigh, he got up to go join the rest of the gang outside who were waiting for him. Slumping his hands in the pockets of his pants, he moved out of the booth with a solemn gaze.

"Hey."

His steps came to a screeching halt when he heard Y/N call out to him. Looking over, she smiled sweetly in his direction.

"Hope I see you later." With a flirtatious wink, she bid him goodbye as she disappeared into the back.

Yeosang stood there stunned momentarily, replaying her words over and over again in his mind, pondering endlessly at their meaning.

"Little pussy cat sure got you brain dead, didn't she?"

Startled by the unexpected voice next to him, he jumped when the face of the kind yet stern old lady studied him carefully. With a disapproving shake of her head, she decided it'd be best to warn him before he started getting ideas in his head.

"Listen, you seem like a sweet and sensible young man, so it's best for you to listen to me and stay away from that darn girl. Don't let them sugar coated lips of hers sweet talk themselves into your heart. You'll just end up heart broken like all the lovers she's had."

Picking up some of the plates, she gave him one last look, pointing an accusatory finger at him to get her point across.

"She's dangerous." Finally saying what she needed to say, Miss Audrey headed back with plates in her arms, slapping away Lynn's hands when they attempted to pry them off her, barking instructions at her to watch the counter and leave her be.

"Dangerous....." Yeosang thought to himself, the warning the good intended woman gave him sinking deep in his mind. Although he took her words to heart, something about the way she glanced at him pulled at the strings in his chest, taking his breath away when he remembered the risque position she was in that purposely allowed him to view more than he should have. That memory tinted his cheeks pink, lips unable to suppress a small smile. He knew that he should heed the old woman's advice.

But he had to admit that he loved danger and the thrill it came with.........

█ █ ▇ ▆ ▅ ▄ ▃ ▂▂ ▃ ▄ ▅ ▆ ▇ █ █

Taglist: @little-precious-baby @yunhofingers @brie02 @galaxteez @multidreams-and-desires @deja-vux @hanatiny @couchpotatoaniki @daniblogs164 @a-soft-hornytiny @yunsangoveryonder @minhyukmyluv @nanamarkie @ateezbabysitters @mingismoon @rainteez02

215 notes · View notes

jamietxrtt · 1 year ago

Text

“I guess I just… I mean, the only reason I’m still here, the only reason I made it this far, is because Ted gave me a second chance. He let me back on the team. And he didn’t have to-- he almost didn’t let me come back at all. But he chose to give me a second chance. So isn’t that-- shouldn’t I be, like-- paying that forward, or something?”

Roy took a deep breath. “No.” When Jamie looked up at him, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, Roy continued. “I mean, maybe. I don’t know. To me those situations aren’t the same at all.”

“How so?”

Roy stared at Jamie openly. “Jamie. Come on. There’s no possible way you can compare Ted forgiving you with you forgiving your father.” He shook his head. “You never-- you never really hurt Ted. You were a brat, yes. And you were fucking annoying. And you were a pain in all our sides. But you could never-- and sorry if this is fucking dismissive or whatever, but it’s the truth-- you were never really more than a nuisance to Ted, and to me. It wasn’t like you could ever do anything to actually affect us more than causing annoyance and frustration. Compare that to your father, who--" Roy's voice broke, his lungs rebelling at the thought of even attempting to describe what Jamie's father had done. "Twenty years. No? Twenty fucking years of him making your life hell-- of-- of abusing you, Jamie.”

Jamie flinched at the a-word, like Roy knew he would. Jamie was never comfortable with that word, and had asked Roy many times not to use it when discussing his father. Usually, Roy accepted that. But right now, he had a point to make, one that relied on Jamie not hiding from the magnitude of his father’s actions.

“You being a brat to Ted for a couple months is just in no way comparable to that. At all. There’s a big fucking difference between forgiving someone after they’ve proven to be worthy of trust, that they’re fucking improving now, and recognizing that and allowing them to grow-- versus just letting someone continue to hurt you after they’ve already been hurting you for twenty fucking years just because you-- you think you deserve to be punished for some shit you did years ago--”

“I never said that!” Jamie snapped.

“Tell me it’s not fucking true, though.” Roy held Jamie’s gaze, fiercely intent on not letting him back out of this one.

Jamie didn’t last a minute before he buckled, looking down and away silently. He shook his head almost imperceptibly.

“Yeah. That’s what I thought.” Roy took a deep breath, shaking with rage and emotion.

“And-- and also, all this talk about fucking second chances and shit, this isn’t even you giving him a second chance! And I know that, because for this to have gone on for nearly twenty fucking years means you must’ve let a lot of things slide. Every time you cover up a bruise and still answer his calls the next time your phone rings, that’s you giving him another chance. And has he done anything different any of those fucking times? No. This isn’t you giving him a second chance, Jamie. It’s you giving him a thousand-and-second chance. And if he’s never changed before, what makes you think this will be the time when he does?”

Jamie set his mug down, shaking his hands out nervously. “But Ted always says--”

“Well, Ted’s wrong!” Roy burst out, suddenly fuming. “You know you don’t have to listen to everything he says one hundred percent of the time, right? Jesus Christ, Jamie, he’s not God. He can be wrong, you know.”

“I know that,” Jamie spit back. “I was just gonna say, like… I received a thousand-and-one second chances too, back when I was a dick, and I never took any of them for years. And doesn’t Ted always say to never give up on people? It took me being given a thousand and two chances to finally take one, and I wouldn’t have been able to do that if Ted hadn’t kept giving them to me. So like-- it just feels wrong to give up on him. My dad. It feels wrong to give up on him, just because he’s never taken any chances before. What if this is the time that things are different?”

“What if it’s not?” Roy shook his head. “Or, fuck, even if it is-- how long are you gonna have to put up with his shit in order to get there? Why is it worth it for you to hurt for his own fucking self improvement? Why is that a price you’re willing to pay?”

“Because Ted paid it for me!” Jamie was getting animated now, too, scooting to the edge of his chair and gesturing with his hands. “Ted paid it for me, and you paid it for me, and fucking-- Sam and Nate paid it for me, and everyone I hurt who let me come back anyway paid it-- took the chance that I’d hurt them again-- so that I could fix my shit. It’s just-- it’s fucking… paying it forward. Isn’t it?”

“No.” Roy shook his head vehemently. “No, Jamie, it’s fucking-- nobody paid it for you. Nobody let you keep hurting them just to aid your own fucking emotional growth or whatever. I mean, didn’t Ted tell you when he let you come back that if you ever fucked with Sam again-- even one time-- that he’d drop you from the team so fast your head would fucking spin?”

“I mean… not in those words, exactly, but yeah.”

“Right. So-- that was the whole fucking point, then. To throw the safeguards up. To make sure that nobody got hurt again. Because people getting hurt is not worth it. It wouldn’t have been worth it to let you come back if Sam had kept getting hurt from it. And it’s not worth it now to give your dad the fucking time of day if it means you get hurt from it.” Roy took both of Jamie’s hands in his own, practically begging him to listen. “Christ, Jamie, it’s not fucking worth it. Please.”

Jamie looked down, his eyebrows wrinkling up like they did when he was always deep in thought. He slipped his hands out of Roy’s, scooting back away from him. But it seemed like he was listening.

“If you wanted to do this,” Roy continued. “If you really, truly did, you could’ve fucking asked me to be the safeguard! I’d have done it in a heartbeat. I could’ve been with you when you saw him, made sure this didn’t go south again. We could’ve done this safely! We could’ve--” he cut himself off, pressing a palm to his forehead when he realized how what he was saying sounded. The last thing he needed right now was to start blaming Jamie for this, make him think it was his fault for doing it wrong.

Roy took a deep breath. “I wish you’d told me,” he said, much more quietly. “I could’ve stopped it-- I could’ve gotten you out of there-- before it got this bad.”

Jamie was still silent.

“But I’m not sure you even did really, truly want to do this, Jamie. That’s why I yelled at Ted. I don’t think you really wanted this. And maybe I’m-- maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m way off-base here, maybe I’m being an asshole. But to me it kinda seems like you only did this because Ted told you to, and so you thought you had to. I just-- I wish you’d told me.”

After another moment of quiet, Roy looked back up at Jamie. He was sitting strangely, different from his usual casual air-- tight and pristine, posture straight, hands folded neatly in his lap. Still, he was fidgeting, one thumb running up and down the back of the other hand.

“I think…” Jamie said slowly, quietly. Roy wasn’t sure how much of the past minute of their conversation he’d heard, wasn’t sure how long he’d been lost in thought. “I think maybe you were right, earlier.” His thumb nail dug into his skin. “I think maybe part of me did think I deserved to… deserved this.” He gestured halfheartedly at the bruises on his face. “Maybe part of me was… looking for it. And that’s why I never told you, or anyone, so that you could keep it in check. Because I didn’t want anyone to keep it in check. Maybe I was… hoping, almost, that it would get bad again. So I could… get what I… deserved.”

The silence following that admission was nearly unbearable. The ticking of the grandfather clock in Roy’s dining room had never been so loud. Despite Roy essentially accusing him of it earlier, it was one thing to suspect it and entirely another to hear Jamie admit it. In the same quiet, calm sort of voice you might use to explain something horrible to a child.

Roy’s emotions always seemed to catch him by surprise, these days. One second he was watching Jamie intently, trying to process what he had just said, and the next a huge lump had lodged itself in his throat, dangerously close to escaping as a sob.

He couldn’t speak. Even if he could manage to open his mouth without that lump escaping, there would be nothing to say to that admission. Nothing.

So Roy lurched forward instead, tugging Jamie into a tight bear hug like he did every time he didn’t know how to help the boy.

Jamie’s careful, put-together posture vanished the instant Roy touched him. He reacted quickly, letting himself crumble forward into Roy’s arms with the violent release of someone barely holding it together. His hands balled into fists, and he buried his face in Roy’s shirt like a child hiding in their mother’s skirts. Roy couldn’t see his expression, buried as his face was in his shoulder, but he felt his breaths, shaky and uneven and trembling.

Roy squeezed him harder, bringing his hand up to card his fingers through Jamie’s hair.

It wasn’t until the phone was already ringing that Roy thought through the logistics of his plan. Whether he should call Ted or not wasn’t even a question-- he had to get an explanation for this, right now-- but the time difference wasn’t something Roy had considered. It was probably around three in the morning in Kansas right now. Ted might not even pick up the phone at all-- and if he did, he’d be in bed, eyes blinking open and hair askew. The mental image of Ted being woken up by his call almost made Roy feel guilty for a second, but he was too fucking pissed off to feel bad for very long.

Eventually, Ted did pick up the phone, a croaked “Roy?” sounding tinny through Roy’s phone.

“What the fuck did you do?” Roy demanded immediately. “What did you say to him?”

“What’d I-- what?” Ted sounded bleary and unfocused, his voice still hoarse. “W’happened?”

“Jamie. You fucking said something to him.”

“I-- I did?”

Roy’s teeth ground together with an unpleasant squeak. “About his father.”

The line was silent for a moment.

“Oh.”

“You said something to him, about-- forgiveness?! Forgiveness, Ted?” Roy shook his head in disbelief, though he knew Ted couldn’t see it over the phone. “You fucking told him to forgive his father.”

“Yeah, well, I thought it might--”

“Fuck whatever you thought it might do,” Roy growled. “He’s fucking bleeding right now, because of you.”

“He-- what?!” Now Ted sounded more awake. “Wait, Jamie? What happened? Is he okay?”

“No thanks to you.” Roy squeezed the wooden railing of his porch, glaring into the night sky above. “Because of your little fucking pep talk, he ended up letting his father start fucking living with him, and now I’ve had to just spend the past hour talking him down from a fucking panic attack and cleaning the fucking blood off his fucking face and-- fuck, Ted! Did you even think at all about what you were fucking saying?” Roy shook his head again, trying his best to keep his volume under control-- Jamie was just on the other side of a glass door, after all. “Why would you fucking say that to him?”

“I…” There was an indistinct shuffling from the other side of the phone, like Ted was scrambling to get out of bed. “I didn’t tell him to do any of that, I just said--”

“You said to forgive him.”

“No-- well, I--”

“Yes. Jamie said that’s the word you used.”

“But that’s not what I meant.”

“I don’t give a flying fuck what you fucking meant, Lasso. Whatever you meant to say, what he got from it was that he has to bend over fucking backwards to accommodate his father, give him a second chance-- no, not a second chance, a fucking thousand-and-second chance-- or else Ted is going to be disappointed in him.”

There was another moment of quiet, where Ted let out a long, controlled breath. Part of Roy’s brain supplemented a memory of Ted before a game, closing his eyes and performing breathing exercises into cupped palms, but the rest of Roy rejected it outright. He was too fucking blazing mad to be feeling any sort of understanding for Ted at the moment.

“I do think forgiveness is a-- a virtue we should all strive towards,” Ted said finally, calmly, and Roy barked out a laugh.

“You think that fucking matters right now? Your fucking Lasso philosophy? He’s bleeding, Ted.”

“Well, I didn’t know that was how this would end up!” Ted’s voice shot back, suddenly defensive in a way Roy had never heard him before. “Everyone can change, Roy, you know I believe that--”

“Jesus, Ted, you weren’t thinking for a fucking second about the consequences of what you said to him, were you? You saw fucking Wembley! Jamie is terrified of that man! He’s sent him to the fucking hospital before! Sure, maybe he can fucking change, I don’t fucking know.” Roy ran his hands through his hair. “But you really think it’s worth the risk of letting Jamie get hurt again, on the off-chance that this is the time things are different? When that man sends him into hysterics every time he’s around? When Jamie’s still got scars from him? I mean, this is the man that had him fucking raped at fourteen, Jesus, Ted--”

“He-- what?!” Ted squawked over the line, but Roy was too fired up to stop.

“You think it’s worth the fucking risk just to-- just ‘cause he could change this time? What if he fucking doesn’t? Or doesn’t yet? Even if he does change, it’s not gonna be instantaneous. You willing to just let him keep hurting Jamie for another-- year, two years, ten years, until he’s finally changed? That’s worth it? Just ‘cause forgiveness is a fucking virtue?”

Roy stopped to breathe, his cheeks hot with anger as he heaved in one breath after another.

When Ted spoke again, he sounded terrified. “I didn’t-- now, Roy, a lot of that stuff I didn’t even know about--”

“Bullshit,” Roy spat. “Bullshit, bullshit. You were there at Wembley. You saw enough. You saw.” Roy dug his fingernails into the wooden railing. The wood was soft from the rain last night. “And even if you’re right-- even if that man could change, did change-- even if he never hurt Jamie again, you still think-- you know what he said to me? He said, ‘I thought it’s what I had to do to be a good person.’ That’s what he said. Because of what you fucking told him, he thought he’d be a bad person if he just deleted his dad’s fucking number and went the fuck on with his life like I told him to do.”

“That’s not what I said to him. I was just giving advice, I didn’t say that not following it would make him a bad person--”

“Jesus, Ted, that doesn’t fucking matter! The boys look up to you, they--” Roy growled, slamming his fist down on the railing. “How many times have you given me this exact same fucking talk? ‘Careful what you say to them, Roy, you know how they look up to you. You say jump, they say how high.’ Yeah? Didn’t you fucking say that to me?”

“Roy--”

“You tell them that something is the right thing to do, of course they’re gonna assume it’s the fucking-- universal truth of it. Of course they’re gonna wanna do what you say, ‘cause Ted’s the best person, so if he says this is what’s right then it must be what I have to do to be good too, yeah? Of course they’re gonna fucking listen to you. Christ, Ted. Surely you know the effect you have on people.”

Ted was quiet for a long moment. When he spoke again, his voice wasn’t shrill or defensive-- it was just soft. “Well, I didn’t mean…”

“Yeah, whatever,” Roy huffed. He turned to peer through the glass door back into the house, but Jamie wasn’t in his line of sight. He should probably get back in there-- Jamie had been alone for a while now. But he turned back toward the backyard, back toward the night sky, to address Ted one last time. “I’m fucking pissed at you, Ted. I’m pissed that you fucked this up so massively and then just fucking left. I’m pissed that it’s my job now to pick up the pieces of the thing you broke. Why do I have to be the one to clean up your fucking mess?”

Ted said nothing.

“Whatever. I have to go take care of my fucking player.”

“Hold on, now. Roy--”

Roy hung up.

After tucking his phone back into his pocket with shaking hands, Roy gripped the railing tight, bending forward to shut his eyes and breathe down into the floor. He couldn’t go back in there like this, still flushed red and shaking with rage, not when Jamie was still so fragile. He gave himself a minute to breathe, counting to ten and taking deep breaths and thinking of Phoebe and all the things Fieldstone had told him to do when he got too angry. And he tried not to feel any kind of way about the fact that his phone in his pocket hadn’t buzzed again once.

Eventually, he was calm enough to go back inside.

#no context no context for u #copying tags from the og post so u know what ur getting into ->#this is very s3 critical so yknow dont read if u dont want that #also its. like i said. less a fic dedicated to like. character integrity or anything lmao and more just me speaking thru roy #to get my feelings out #its very therapeutic i should write about everything that upsets me in roy's voice

40 notes · View notes

kaypeace21 · 3 years ago

Text

Rebel Robin podcast (ep 3 &4 analysis)

For those who haven’t read them yet. Here’s the analysis for podcast ep 1&2. Analysis of Rebel Robin book-here. And eastereggs from rebel robin novel- here.

So the main things I noticed in ep 3 was how Robin spying was shown as a huge NEGATIVE-and Mr Hauser got upset over her doing so. Robin listens to mr. Hauser’s phone call (like Karen with Mike in s3/ us gov spying on calls in s1) & on a different occasion Robin also eavesdrops on a private convo he is having with someone else in his classroom ( like El spying on Mike talking to Lucas in s3). And when he finds out about this he tells her how wrong it was to spy on other people like that. In the past, I also talked about how the theme of spying is shown for many other st characters ( in the show) and how it isn’t romanticized like people think it is- here .

Anyways , Ep 3 ends with a call from a h*mophobic teen( Dash) telling Robin to “stay away” from Mr. Hauser cause he’s “dangerous”. Why he thinks he’s dangerous is solely for the fact he’s gay.I think this theme may come into play in s4 Hawkins (in relation to the satanic panic). In ep 4 Robin jokes to (gay) Mr. Hauser : “ So what are you into... satanism?” (Sadly most queer people have been told over and over we’re going to hell for being gay/lgbt+. it’s sadly an almost universal experience.) For those unaware- the ‘satanic panic’ was a right wing christian movement in the 80′s that WRONGLY associated certain things with supposed satanism. Just some of the many things they demonized : rock music , stephen king , wearing black, horror/fantasy media, and of course queer people and d&d (hellfire club - the name is a a xmen ref but in the show it’s probably an inside joke about the satanic panic and people being scared of d&d). We see foreshadowing of the satanic panic hinted in s3 (in relation to d&d)- on tv the narrator asks if “satanism” (pans to d&d set) is to blame for the odd occurrances in Hawkins. And given how the s4 el-trailer had the clock say 3:00am for the “witching hour” also called “the devil’s hour” since it’s supposed to be a subversion of jesus dy*ing at 3:00 pm. And the possibility s4 may take place around Easter. I think we’ll see that religious (Christian) extre*sm causes many people in Hawkins to interpret the supernatural as ‘satanic’. And no , I’m obviously not talking poorly about all religious/christian people).

After this Mr. Hauser jokes how Hawkins is like “lord of the flies” and how he “worries” what would happen if teens were left to their own devices-like in the book. The themes in the book mostly focus on the dangers of ‘mob mentality’ and how human beings can become v*olent and turn on each other- if the safety of civilization disappears...

This I believe is foreshadowing - i mentioned in a post a while back (here). How movies on the s4 list had the theme of : a supernatural event indirectly causing towns people to act irrationally and turn on eachother v*olently. Despite literal monsters attacking them from outside (they chose to turn on eachother instead). In the end some townspeople become the real monsters via mob mentality/v*oence/false witch hunts (the mist, the birds, etc). In ‘the birds’ (while people are hidding in a store)- they wrongly blame certain characters for the supernatural chaos. Similarly, in ‘the mist’ (crowd of townspeople are trapped in a store) and some start interpreting the monsters as being sent as punishment by god- some town’s people start quoting the bible and saying the only way to stop the punishment is to start “sacrificing the s*nners and nonbelievers”. BIG YIKES.ST references mapple street (where the wheelers and sinclairs live). It’s based on the twilight zone ep of the same name “The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street” .The ‘monsters’ of that episode -were the townspeople turning on eachother because they incorrectly think their own neighbors are part of an invading supernatural army. The enemy was actually the paranoia/mob mentality-not the supernatural force they feared. And yes i do think this concept is linked with 80s satanic panic and will cause some town division/obstacles for our heroes to deal with . **I also think the s4 bts of the Hawkins blood clinic-may be used to show h*mophobia (linked to satanic panic) in the town. Like in one s4 movie “paradise lost”the punk rock boys who were into black clothes, rock music , horror/stephen king books- were accused by the town’s people of being gay AND have demonic powers that are k*lling fellow town’s people.

Mr Hauser says he thinks steve Harrington is Ralph from lord of the flies. And Robin disagrees saying he’s Jack. Personally- since this was when Robin didn’t know/hated Steve. I think Mr hauser is right that Steve is Ralph (one of the oldest boys) who’s “commitment to civilization and morality is strong”. But Jack (perhaps the popular s4 kid Jake?) and his savage crew take control of the group and start trying to attack Ralph and his friends (steve’s crew- over satanic panic?). How this begins is -

Jack, torments Ralph and others. And some kids begin to develop savage personalities, after someone claims to have seen a Beast (demongorgan?) in the woods. This creates fear among the boys, which allows Jack to access more power.Ralph gets into an argument with Jack, who splits from the tribe. Many of the other boys follow Jack, who uses fear to manipulate the boys into leaving Ralph. And Jack’s crew begin attacking Ralph and his friends.

----------------

Ok, next topic of ep 4- the sentimental part of my brain got emotional when hearing how upset Robin was. And than Mr Hauser-telling her she’s wrong and she’s not “broken” or “rotten” and “nothing about her needs to be fixed’” (got me right in the feels) . As a queer person- I feel like every lgbt+ kid/teen needs to hear what Mr. Hauser said to Robin.

However, the analytical part of my brain -did notice some easterggs/ series parallels.

The convo starts with them talking about music Mr hauser likes (such as Bowie). And transitions to Mr Haauser asking about things she likes, whether she’s being bullied, and he later tells her “ DON’T let other people’s small mindedness make you fell bad about yourself. you don’t need to change yourself-no matter what anyone else says” . And Mr Hauser than says him calling her the “weirdest girl in Hawkins” was a compliment (not an insult-like she initially assumed).

This is remarkably similar to certain scenes in s1/2. In s1, Jonathan mentions musicians he likes such as Bowie, asks Will about what he likes, and tells Will “don't like things cause people tell you you’re supposed to-especially not him (their dad who called him h*mophobic names)” . In s2, Jonathan tries to cheer Will up after asking if he's being being bullied. And calls Will “a freak” (and says it’s a good thing) and he should be content with being a “freak “ and compares Will to Bowie ( who was openly queer since the 70s) .

In ep 4, Robin also mentions how sad she is that her parents won’t let her ride her bike anymore cause their paranoid about her safety (like what happened to Will in s2).

Robin (before Mr. Hauser comforts her) says she feels like she has a “rot” inside her . This is a s2 eastergg that could be linked to either Will or El. Will says his now-memories are “growing”, spreading”, and killing.” Later Kali says the emotional pain caused by her father caused a “wound” to “spread”. Later allusion-Brenner tells El she has a “terrible wound “ (“a rot”) that Will “grow, spread, and kill.”

The reason Robin rants about feeling like she has a “rot” inside her is because she’s being bullied, and lost all her Hawkins friends and says “maybe I’m broken maybe there is just something about me that drives people away? I’m the only common denominator-there’s something wrong with me! There’s something inside of me that’s just rotten and there’s nothing i can do to fix it”. Which 1)-poor Robin. 2) I feel like could easily be How Will feels in s4(who will be the same age as Robin is here in the podcast)- his dad abandoned him, all his hawkins friends are gone , the st s4 movies have h*mophobic bullying in them (and he was bullied in the past). In a interview Noah said Will in s4 “doesn’t really get along with people-it’s just him and Mike.” I think it fits more so with Will than El . But they may feel similar: it’s implied in s4 audition tapes she’ll be bullied too, she moved away from her friends, and her father (Hopper) fake “passed away.” It could easily be how both Will and El feel in s4- that there is something “broken”/ “rotten” about them . In fact, in the rebel Robin novel there is even a character named Sheena. Sheena reminds me a bit of a mix between Will and el . She is very quiet, queercoded, and is often bullied. And she finds mean notes and other things stuffed in her locker- placed there by bullies. A bit like how Will found the zombie-boy note in his locker. A teacher doesn’t stop her bullying just blames her and says “ This wouldn’t happen if you made it just a smidgen easier for PEOPLE to understand you.”(sort of reminding me of that Noah quote about s4 Will not getting along with most people/Jonathan saying not to change himself cause “people” say to). But sheena can be another name for Jane (there was also a 80s show character named Sheena who was psychic) so ...maybe foreshadowing of el/jane being bullied in highschool? Along with Will?

*It’s not a eastergg/parallel...just speculation. Unlike the rebel robin book... in the podcast (in multiple episodes) almost every time she opens up to Mr Hauser about her problems she says it’s ok for him to do the same and she’ll be supportive and listen. However, Mr Hauser (so far) always rejects her offer-much to her hurt/frustration. In ep 4, she asks if he has someone his “own age” he can talk to about his problems-which he says he does. Now... since in ep 4 Mr hauser is paralleled to Jonathan maybe Jonathan will have someone his own age to talk to about his problems (maybe his new friend Argyle?) We see similar to Mr Hauser giving advice/pep talks to (gay) Robin. Jonathan is always giving advice/peptalks to our (gay-coded) Will. But so far- Jonathan has no one he really emotionally leaned on in the same way (Will does with Jonathan). I also wonder if Will in s4 starts gets tired of how he always confides in Jonathan (but Jonathan never does the same with Will in return)? Like Robin with Mr. Hauser?

#robin buckley #steve harrington #will byers #el hopper #jonathan byers #stranger things #stranger things theory

53 notes · View notes

yellowbluemoonshine · 3 years ago

Note

Hi I really love your Fruits Basket analysis, could you do one for Shigure too please?

Wow, nice timing, anon. I was planning to write it :))). Thank you for compliment btw. It makes me really happy. Though, i didnt plan to getting in deep but i will since you asked me. Shigure is not really a character i really enjoy and i cant make long deep analysis for him, the way i did for Akito and Tohru because he is not that deep but anyway lets analysis him.

It wasnt shown openly in main story but Shigure doesnt have good relationship with his family. In manga notes, it says he dislikes them. And the fact that how less we see them in Shigure’s life, there is probably emotional neglect which explains where his obsessive personality came from. Also we saw his parents tell him to greet family head, they probably care about this more than what their own son wants, its not hard to imagine them as utilitarian.

Though, Shigure isnt the only one who has this kind of problem. Ayame wasnt worthy for his family cause he is born as ‘snake’ and wasnt usefull tool for his family. This is why Ayame become overdramatic,ignorant, self centered and loud. This is his way of rebelling, his way of saying 'i am here’ cause his parents neglects him. Hatori’s father is very strict and he was used as tool since he has power to erase people’s memories, this is why he is used to obey, this is where his balanced personality came from.

He is introvert, manpulator but really bad at understanding people’s feelings. He also likes reading books so no wonder, he became author. His books might for to distance himself from others and reality.

They are the first zodiacs who was aware of many things, compared to younger zodiacs. One chose to ignore, one chose to obey, one chose to rebel. Shigure is observant character, his toxic behavours comes from this environment too. How he chose to play mind games. This is his way of handling things. He acts like he doesnt care anything, he looks at his book but silently observe whats going on. He must’ve been realized that they are all tools, maybe he questioned why they even exist at first place, like; whats the meaning of life for him?

And eventually Akito was born, we dont know the details of dream but we know how it effected them deeply. And again, Ayame, Hatori, Shigure gave different reactions to newborn god. Ayame completely ignored that child and ran away from her as much as possible. Hatori obeyed, accepted the sitution, like always. Shigure became obsessive over her.

And Shigure started to define his whole existence, his whole meaning of life as that thing. Like, if he has that thing, his emptiness will be over. To him, Akito is the object he wants to obtain.

And after she was born, just like other zodiacs, he develops some affection for her too. He even comforts her when she needed. But his goal is still same. This is why he intentionally ignore her to make her come. He thinks Akito is just being stubborn about it but she is just not. At that time, Akito was just a kid. Very lonely kid who was just waiting for someone to see her.

Its interesting that Shigure spends a lot of time to observe her, he constantly watching her, making a big plans to have her but he failed to see how much lonely she was. His obsessive personality makes him unable to see Akito as invidual. This is why he can remember her body type, eyes, her way of talking, her moves but he cant describe her feelings, her inner thoughts, her suffering.

This is actually its kinda parallel to Akito’s obsession with bonds. Akito defines her existence with the bonds because this is what he was told and Shigure defines his existence with her. But there is difference between them.

Akito didnt have outside life, friends etc, her god persona was all she had which later changes. Tohru becomes her friend and showing that she doesnt have to be god, she can still be loved as being herself which lead Akito to change. She changes when she was treated as invidual for the first time in her life.

But Shigure had friends and outside life since the beginning. He has Hatori, Ayame, some zodiacs, Mayu, he even later meets with Tohru. There are people who treats and sees him as invidual. There are people who sees his flaws but still accepts him with that. But he is the one who constantly chose to not move forward in the end. He never let go of his obsession and look at the life without it.

I do believe that he felt some care for Akito too. But even though, its definitely meant to be twisted, messed up love, he never try to move on it. This is his biggest flaw. He tries to change everything around him except himself. This is what we sees during the story.

He manipulates people around him to get what he wants. This is why he took Yuki and Kyo, this is why he takes Tohru. Of course, this doesnt mean he doesnt care aboutthem. He is capable of thinking about others and feeling guilty for his actions too. But this is exactly the problem. He seems to realize his flaws but he never try to fix it.

He excuse everything he did for the name of love. Especially the way he treated Akito is really horrible. This

is not something that should be overlooked. We always mentions how Akito shouldnt've treated zodiac like this and for the sake of both side, they should stay away from each others, how Akito should break them free. Same for Akito and Shigure too. Shigure shouldnt have treated Akito like this, it was horrible the way he intentionally make her feel insecure..and no. This wasnt for Akito's or zodiac' s sake, it was for Shigure's sake. Its because he wanted Akito for himself, instead maybe making Akito meet with other people was never option because he wanted her to depending on him. Because he is depending on her in a way, after all, Akito is the object that he defines as self worth.

And no, they dont deserve each others too, noone deserves to be treated like this, noone should play someone's mental illness the way Shigure did to Akito.

And he blames her for betraying him but...we dont know when he starts to have sexual feelings for her, he says he eventually obtained her which he probably meant that he sexually posses her cause for Shigure, sexuality is big part of love and how he express his love. Eventually they had sexual relationship but the fact that Akito still wasnt felt loved by Shigure and saw her body as something she should give to other men (Kureno) means she felt like a sex object. Also what was he thinking when he slept with mentally unstable young girl who has no idea how to relationship works? This is how Shigure treats her generally though. He came to her side and sleeps with her and goes back. The lack of emotional connection is always there.

Also how old was she when she had some relationship with Kureno and Shigure? She looks extremely young in those scenes. She is 6-8 years younger than them which means they had sexual relationship with her when she was teenager? Its messed up.

The reason people call as grooming, there is a emotional manipulation Shigure used on Akito since they were children and Akito's world view is very limited. Shigure as someone who has more agency should've known this and the reason people call as or pedophile, its because of all that age different. Author messed upw ith those ages and its really disturbing cause Akito was big possibility teenager when she had sexual relationships which is oof. The only reason i dont mention is because there was some supernatural thing over there etc but still disturbing.

Ironic part that Shigure was called out when he tried to flirt with Tohru even as joke but same thing didnt happen with Akito. Is it because she is cult girl, she doesnt deserve protection? Akito is not older than Tohru that much, Tohru was 16-17, Akito is 19-20 in those times but Shigure is portrayed as Tohru’s adult figure/father figure but with Akito, he flirt with her when she wasnt even 16 years old and he is both lover and father figure for her? Its horrible really. Its not okay to flirt with Tohru who is normal high school girl cause thats the rule of society but its okay to flirt with Akito who is emotionally younger than Tohru because she is not normal highschool girl, they are in cult so its okay? Its not Akito’s fault borning in some cult.

He also justify sleeping with Ren, yes he was hurted by Akito’s actions and he has right to mad at her but i wished he focus on his own wrong actions, instead of putting blame to others. He emotionally manipulates her and intentionally enabling her destructive behavours to increase tension between her and zodiac. I think people really underrate how much Akito was traumtized by this. Shigure is keep making jokes about it, Akito got triggerred by little moments and her mind literally goes back to Ren. He literally made her internalized misogny worse and increase her hatred against women more cause she didnt want to blame Shigure or other men for betrayal. This is why she lash out to other women.

(I am talking about those things cause its important both for this character and story and shouldnt been overlooked.)

I dont think this is love. Love is strong emotional connection between two inviduals but Shigure just doesnt understand her at all. He keeps pushing her corner. And she is depending on him too much which is so unhealthy.

Rin and Haru has same problem too though, Rin is depending on Haru too much but at least, their love feels more like...love. Rin doesnt see him as father figure lol. And Haru didnt love her cause of some supernatural dream, they just love each others as invidual and yes, sex was too early for them too. Especially for Rin but at least, Haru was younger, he maybe couldnt think that far but Shigure is older than Akito, he should’ve know better. Also, Haru hates Rin's abusive parents cause they hurted her deeply but Shigure actually feel empathy for Ren, the one of people who deeply hurted Akito.

I am not saying that noone should feel empathy for Ren, i am saying why all of people it had to be Shigure who supposed to love Akito the most? No wronder, he related to Ren cause his obsession of Akito is parallel with Ren’s obsession of Akira. Its kinda similar.

Every story has and need a character like Shigure, someone who push the plot and some of his scenes are really entertaining too, so i understand why people like him but i think the way he treated Akito and how he used people shouldnt been overlooked and he should have get consequences of his actions but he never get one, unlike Akito so i dislike him a lot.

People can only grow when they recognize their wrong actions and try to change it. This is Shigure’s character flaw, he understand his wrong actions and never bother to change it. He asks Akito 'how she will atone?' but would he bother to ask himself to same queston too?

In the end, he never does. He never grows as character. Theme of story is literally uncontional love doesnt exist but his relationship with Akito comes from contional situtions, full of toxic, unchanging and eternal. He literally says its eternal to Akito. Basically condracts with the theme of story.

Just like how Akito need to end her relationship with zodiac for both their sake and her sake, Shigure should’ve end his relationship with Akito. People around him call him out for it, Hatori and Kureno told him to act kind, Ren questioned his love but Shigure never seems to stop and thinking how unhealthy this love is, not for himself but also for Akito and he shouldnt just act like this.

Yes, he is realistic character but he is realistic jerk and it shouldnt be funny. I dont like him saying 'i am jerk/i am not good person anyway' as joke but never really adressed by narrative, it only makes him weak as character. Its not some determination, its weakness. This is why him being separated from Akito in the end would be good punishment for everything he did, it would be consequences of his actions but it didnt. -_-.

When he properly take care of Tohru and zodiac or help Hatori or Mayu, he seems more sempathic because despite him being very selfish person, you can see he care about people around too. Shigure should've find his own worth outside of his obsession with Akito, instead until the end, he keeps holding on to her.

I am saying this as someone who used to blindly accept all types of canon relationships because its canon but this relationship made me wake up.

Saying that 'Akito deserved this cause she was toxic' is same mindset that justify police force. If people think Akito's relationship with zodiac should end for good, then they should think the same for Akito and Shigure's relationship too. No matter what, just because Akito acted toxic, this doesnt justify Shigure's acting same too.

You can learn more how the healthy relationship works in here;

https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/healthy-self-healthy-love-characteristics-of-strong-relationship-030220185

People say their relationship became healthy and author said so, lol even though, story shows opposite. More details in here. If author says this relationship is healthy, does she even know what healty relationship is? : ) This is not an example of toxic relationship can become healthy either because if you look at details and research about what is healthy relationship is, you will see thier relationship didnt change that much in core.

Story shows opposite. What a reader supposed to do when author’s words condratcts with whats they write? To me, what story shows me is more important than saying. So, its still unhealthy relationship and its not real love.

Basically; To me, a character who is unwilling to change for better, character who never face any consequences of their actions, character who is very selfish is weak and boring character. Also i hate the way he treated Akito a lot. And again, it shouldnt be overlooked. Its horrible. And no, he doesnt change in the end, he just loose his reason to fight cause he gets what he wants.

What a shame. It whould be a lot inspiring to watch characters ending toxic relationship but in the end, its normalized and ruins their potential to be grow. Akito would try to change for better anyway, for Shigure, story would force him to change and finally he would have to do something about his life which is better ending. Well, f.ck the canon, we can make our own endings.

In the end, this post became my rant but its true though.

(I might edit things later).

#sohma shigure #anti akigure #sohma ayame #sohma hatori #sohma akito #furuba analysis #fruits basket meta #abuse

20 notes · View notes

scaryorganmusic · 4 years ago

Text

Since making this post I can’t stop going insane over Morgana and Sam parallels, from the most literal, like their powers starting with prophetic nightmares, to the queer allegories of it all, and mostly how the people who were supposed to support them the most ended up driving them away

These bastards

The first to fail them, and who failed them the most, are of course the fathers. Obsessed with revenge for their late wives and filled with hate for anything that resembles magic/monsters. The line from Morgana that really gets me is he hates magic more than he cares for me, and considering John was ready to kill Sammy “if needed be”, I’d say it applies. Morgana and Sam were also the children willing to openly rebel when they disagreed with their fathers, as opposed to Arthur and Dean, the “good sons” and good soldiers.

(Of course, if we take powers as an allegory for queerness, that feeling that this is the limit where the supposed unconditionality of a parent’s love stops, feels very familiar)

The misguided attempts

I’m not sure if this is controversial but it shouldn’t be, Merlin and Dean, despite their intentions, also failed to provide the support Morgana and Sam needed. Merlin took her to the druids, he kept her secret, but ultimately chose self preservation, he could’ve put an end to her loneliness and fear by telling the truth, but didn’t. Dean couldn’t disguise how afraid Sam’s powers made him, and gave Sam plenty of reason to believe he couldn’t be trusted, that honesty would be punished (as it was, when Dean eventually found out about Ruby and the Demon blood).

The powerful

The angels and the dragons, powerful entities repeating the prophecy that Sam and Morgana were destined for evil, whispering it in Dean’s and Merlin’s ear

The (not so) wise men

Bobby and Gaius. that’s it.

“But they’re evil”

In comes Morgause and Ruby, the first people to accept them, all of them, powers included. The first ones to tell them powers shouldn’t be hidden or repressed, that there wasn’t anything inherently wrong with them. “But they’re evil”, sure, but they when everyone else drove Morgana and Sam away, they were there. Honestly, how could it have gone any other way?

The narrative

Perhaps the most infuriating part of all of it is the narrative itself isn’t kind to either of them. Merlin tries to make the point that magic isn’t evil, it can be used for good or bad, it depends on people’s choices, but in order to highlight Merlin as the good they need to punish Morgana as the bad, how much choice did she really have though? Their circunstances were completely different, she didn’t have Gaius, she didn’t have a prophecy on her side.

And Supernatural, god only knows what the fuck they were trying to say, at points it seemed like they were trying to go with “monsters aren’t always bad”, but somehow they always had to be killed anyways. Sam didn’t choose having demon blood, he didn’t choose having his life manipulated by Lucifer from the start, but he did choose to try and do good with all of it, he learned how to use his powers so he could exorcise demons without hurting innocent people, and Ruby could show him how to do that. And still, to highlight Dean as the right one here, he is locked and blamed and punished, over and over.

In summary: I’m a lesbian and have a lot of thoughts.

#supernatural #bbc merlin #morgana pendragon #sam winchester #this is full on a 2012 tumblr blog now i am so sorry

23 notes · View notes

windtraces · 2 years ago

Text

king deshret and the lord of flowers PLOTTED A REBELLION AGAINST CELESTIA. the lord of flowers either died or went into eternal slumber to give him the knowledge needed to try this but it is probably what drove him mad and caused eleazar because it is forbidden knowledge. they both wanted to "transcend the absurd shackles that governed this world" and king deshret even "reject[ed] the gift granted by the divine throne". it's implied that during the archon wars, deshret, lord of flowers and buer actually shared the throne, rather than having buer be the sole archon of sumeru. she's just the only one to survive. no mentions of her thoughts on rebellion

one quote that stuck out: "At that moment, [the Lord of Flowers] learned that her fate was no riddle, but the key to opening a mysterious doorway" made me INSANE because. you know, loading screen doorway!!

also: "You seek but to chain the winds. Upon the tombstone of divinity shall humanity become the god of gods" is likely referring in some way to istaroth, because winds. the winds in general have been getting a lot of negative connotations in sumeru. considering that istaroth is part of the first throne of the heavens, it's interesting they'd think of chaining the winds to oppose celestia? because they are definitely talking about rebelling against celestia. this and the recent lantern rite stuff about mortals having the capacity to be the equals of gods is DEFINITELY cool though

and speaking of istaroth, the lord of flowers warns: "Seek not the Master of the Four Shades, and inquire not into the mysteries of the sky and the abyss. Otherwise, as shown by the nail of retribution, certain calamity and sorrow shall follow."

another interesting quote: "Dreams will always dissolve- this is the true meaning of the blooming of flowers." i just think this is neat since buer is a god of dreams and such, but a lot of genshin's lore and conflict seems to come from people desiring to learn the truth and dissolve illusions, ie the fake sky. and yet when taking about deshret wanting to rebel, it says "The Red Lord chose a noble lie, shepherding his followers on a path towards oblivion" so even truth isn't that clear cut? unless "truth" can also stand for "the truth celestia wants it to be and has worked to make" such as that there was no phanes

"Only by suffering through a god's delusions can humanity learn to rise against divine will" has some interesting implications for inazuma, considering that beelzebul has stated that she wants to break free from the divine mandate of the heavens and has received help from istaroth to make this possible. because the people of inazuma DID suffer a lot under her, that could be suffering through a god's delusions. and speaking of beelzebul, the line "But 'eternity' is ultimately a lie." this was talking mostly about how king deshret and the lord of flowers failed and couldn't stay together forever, but still. interesting thoughts

the lord of flowers has a ton of interesting quotes too. "You must fear not the crystalline sapphire nail" for example. "Remember the punishment that was once inflicted on the fallen envoys of heaven." my guesses are that this would be either the seelie or the moon sisters, though the moon sisters do seem connected to the seelie, so i'm right anyways. "If there is hope to be found in this world, it will be found kindling within mortals most ordinary." so bennett "normal guy" adventureteam is going to overthrow the second throne of the heavens.

and this whole bit: "It was a faraway time of calm and peace. Divine envoys spoke openly with the people then, bringing them the word from the heavens... But, in time, invaders descended from beyond the firmament, bringing with them destruction, overturning rivers, spreading plagues... And though the invaders brought war to my former kin, they also brought about illusions that could break through shackles to the land. But the master of the heavens, consumed by fear from the rising tide of delusion and breakthroughs, sent down the divine nails to mend the land, laying waste to the mortal realm."

celestia sent down the various nails to stop the flow of outlander illusions and ultimately stop these shackles from being broken, as well as a punishment for seeking the shining shades and the primordial one. why is it illusions? the plague they brought is almost certainly abyssal corruption or perhaps the honkai. who came past the firmament other than the traveler and their sibling? these must be the other descenders

my guesses would be the seelie or khaenri'ahns but they both predate king deshret and the lord of flowers knowing all this, and if the first nail fell in the desert, it has to have fallen well over 2000 years ago, because we know that the skyfrost nail fell on dragonspine and drove the imunlaukr clan to the mondstadt of decarabian over 2600 years ago. it has to have been at least that long because the imunlaukrs are one of the founding clans of mondstadt.

just. read the whole story for these artifacts it is bananas

HAVE YOU GUYS READ THE LORE FOR THE FLOWER OF PARADISE LOST ARTIFACT SET BECAUSE IT IS ACTUALLY SO FUCKING INSANE

#lorepost

5 notes · View notes

xuxunette · 4 years ago

Text

My own translation of MDZS, chapter I.

Done for fun and for free.

Rebirth - Part I

“Wei Wuxian is dead! Everybody celebrate!” Not two days after the frightful assault on Shambled-Tombs Mound1, the news flew to every corner of the Daoist world as if it had sprouted wings — spreading with more speed than the erstwhile flames of war. Suddenly, whether famous masters from prestigious schools or wandering practitioners from mountain tops, everyone was discussing the punitive expedition led by the allied Four Great Clans, who had charged into the fray ahead of a hundred smaller sects. “Great, great news! Everybody celebrate indeed! But who could have slain the Master of Monsters Mountain2?” “Who else could have done it? His sworn brother, the young chief Jiang Cheng, of course! He led into battle his own clan from Misty River, alongside the Jin Clan from Orchid Hill, the Lan Clan from the Maiden Forest, and the Nie Clan from Honest Creek3. He upheld justice over family ties by destroying the ‘Shambled-Tombs Mound’ where Wei Wuxian had dug his lair.” “I’ll say a fair word: good riddance!” Someone immediately cheered on loudly, “You're right, good riddance! If the Jiang Clan hadn’t picked him up off the streets and raised him, that rascal Wei Wuxian would have remained a common vermin from the slums all his life... let alone become anything else! The former Jiang patriarch raised him as his own son, but him? He openly rebelled and made enemies out of all the other sects. Not only bringing dishonour to the Jiang Clan, but also causing them to be nearly wiped out. That’s the definition of being an ungrateful cur; he bit the hand that fed him!” “I can’t believe Jiang Cheng tolerated that punk’s arrogance for so long. Were it me, back when he defected, I wouldn't have let him off the hook with only a stab wound. I’d have purged his whole sect straight away, and he wouldn’t have committed all those atrocities afterwards. With scum like that, there is no ‘consideration for a childhood friend’ and ‘regard for a co-disciple’ to be had.” “But that’s not what I heard, is it? Hasn’t Wei Ying4 gotten his comeuppance from his devious sorcery backfiring on him? Wasn’t he torn apart and gnawed to pieces by the demonic generals under his command? I heard he’s been mawed alive and turned into fine bone powder.” “Hahaha… That’s karmic retribution for you. I wanted to say it all along, those demonic servants he kept? They were just like badly-leashed, rabid dogs, waiting to bite. That they ate him in the end only serves him right!” “Be it as it may, if Jiang Cheng hadn’t carefully planned the assault around the Master of Monsters Mountain’s weaknesses, the expedition may not have succeeded at all. Don’t forget about the artefact Wei Wuxian possessed, and the time he decimated an entire army of three thousand skilled practitioners in a single night.” “Wasn’t it five thousand?” “Three thousand or five thousand, it's all the same. Though, I bet it was five thousand.”　 “...The rampage of a true madman!” “At least he destroyed the Yin Tiger-Tally5 before his death. That’d count as paying some amends. If he’d left the cursed object in this world to inflict further suffering on humankind, his sins would have been even greater.”The crowd fell silent as the three words “Yin Tiger-Tally” were pronounced, as if everybody had turned to contemplation. Eventually, someone sighed.“Alas... To think that, back in the days, Wei Wuxian was an exalted practitioner: the illustrious scion of an influential clan. He wasn’t without merits either. He made a name for himself at a young age, and lived in boundless fame… How he ended up where he has, I wonder…” At the changed topic, the chitter-chatter of commentaries ignited anew. “It goes on to prove that orthodoxy is the only way to practice the Discipline. Deviance and heresy may yield flitting glory to gloat about at first, but look at what happened to him in the end.”The crowd cried out at once, “Death with no whole corpse left behind5!” “The path he chose in his practice wasn’t the only cause of his downfall, though. Ultimately, it was Wei Wuxian’s

despicable character that did him in — angering the heavens and vexing men. As the saying goes, good and evil each reaps their rewards, and the heavens see to it that what goes around always comes around...”Thus, judgment was passed upon Wei Wuxian’s cold remains. The content of the debate never varied much, and a consensus was soon reached. The few, faint dissenting voices that rose on occasions were swiftly quelled. However, the shadow of a worry still lingered in people’s hearts. Although the Master of Monster Mountain’s carnal envelope was said to have perished at Shambled-Tombs Mound, no one was able to summon his injured soul to dispose of it. Perhaps the demons had devoured it at the same time they did his body... or perhaps had it escaped. If it was the first, then all was well. But the latter was also far from impossible: the Master of Monsters Mountains had been so powerful, he could upturn the skies and trample the earth, move mountains and change sea’s tides — or so it was told — and resisting the summon would be for him no feat at all. 　 Hence, should the day come that Wei Wuxian managed to restore his soul and snatch a body to reincarnate into with his powers still intact, all of the Daoist realm, or even all of humanity, would inevitably face his dreadful retaliation. His wrath would then only be augmented many times over, bringing about the reign of darkness without the bright of dawn, gales of pestilence and tempests of blood. Consequently, one hundred and twenty beastly-stone guardians were erected on the peak of Shambled-Tombs Mound whilst the largest clans carried frequent soul-summoning ceremonies. Incidences of demonic possession were strictly investigated, information about abnormal occurrences was carefully collected; all practitioners remained in a state of highest alert. The first year went by, and all stayed calm. The second year went by, and all stayed calm. The third year went by, and all stayed calm.… The thirteenth year went by, all still stayed calm, and people started to relax at last. Maybe Wei Wuxian hadn’t been so powerful after all. Maybe his soul had perished as well. And even if he once could, with a wave of his hand, overturn the skies and command the fall of rain, he had been the one to be toppled over in the end. Besides, nobody could be dreaded above the gods forever. Legends, after all, were only legends.

Notes:1. 乱葬岗 (Luanzang gang) lit.: ‘disorderly burial mountain ridge’. 2. 夷陵老祖 (Yiling Laozu) is Wei Wuxian’s honorary title/nickname. In this case it is an informal one. Yiling lit.: ‘barbarians’ mountain’. Laozu lit.: ‘venerated ancestor’. 3. Jiang from Yunmeng, Jin from Lanling, Lan from Gusu, Nie from Qinghe. These clan names hint at the four cardinal directions, as well as four different settings. Note that xianxia typically take place in China’s southern regions, following the tradition of Water Margins, and as represented in The Untamed web-series. I chose to translate the region names to convey some of the flavor that transpires from the Chinese text. See appendix on names from the story for further details. 4. Wei Wuxian’s birth name. At this point all three names of our protagonist have been cited: his birth name — given at birth (Wei Ying), his courtesy name — given upon adulthood (Wei Wuxian), and his honorary title/nickname — given for achievements (Master of Monsters Mountain). 5. Yin refers to Yin-Yang, the dual principles central to Daoist beliefs. Yin being the negative/feminine/lunar/shadowy/deadened side, to Yang or positive/masculine/solar/light/alive side. I've seen it translated into ‘stygian’, on youtube, which carries the notion of ‘hellish’ — although this translation mixes in a western concept (the Styx River from the ancient Greeks) it’s not an error insofar as Daoists consider the underworld ‘yin’ in nature. A Tiger-Tally is a historical artefact used by generals to confirm the deployment of troops. 5. In Chinese beliefs, the body of the deceased not being conserved integrally is considered a desecration of the worst sort. This is why Meng Yao's actions later on are considered so cruel.

#mdzs translation

3 notes · View notes