#they had whole games in there w no expiration

[simplyghosting]

Thinking about her -> Complete Amazon Trail CD-ROM included in cereal package

[vin-taege]

Hi! I loved your awkward chishiya flirting sooo much <3 The way you write is so in character even with him being nervous about showing affection. Can you write him being completely oblivious he’s liked yn the whole time they’ve been through the games; he thought he was just protecting them out of trying to be a better person until Kuina is like you moron you’re clearly in love w them!!

And he’s like oh fuck, what are feelings?? I have them?? His thought process as he tries to deny it and then him having some awkward interactions w yn bc he doesn’t know how to act now he’s aware he likes her and then is desperately trying to flirt with no idea how to at all

Tokens of Appreciation

Summary: Chishiya tells himself that he sees you only as a friend, despite doing his best to give you a gift.

Genre: fluff

Pairing: reader x chishiya

Words: 2.4k

Note: I tweaked this a little to show more of him being in denial and still in the middle of processing it ^^ I didn't want it to be too close to the other awkward flirting fic, but I hope you still like it! Also god, I;m so sorry it took more than a year ; O; Good news is that I'm almost done with my thesis, so I have a bit more time to write :DD

Chishiya set the screwdriver down with a frustrated sigh. The music box sat in front of him, open yet still without song. He saw this on the day of the six of clubs game. The car that was supposed to pick them up got a flat tire and stranded them for a good hour. As much as he hated the militants for their incompetence, he was grateful that he had extra time to scavenge around the nearby shops. It was in one of the metalwork stalls where he found it.

It was fairly light, small enough that you could hold it when you brought both hands together. The outside looked like a small pot, with the lid having scalloped edges. Ornate, gold vines swirled around the sides of the box, leading up to the front. At the center of it was a teardrop-shaped gemstone that refracted prisms under light. Inside was a small rabbit instead of a typical ballerina. It posed with its arms up mid-dance, pointy ears curved back as it looked up.

That was what made Chishiya decide that this was the perfect gift for you. At the beginning of your friendship—before you had worn down his walls with “incessant” conversation—you had off-handedly mentioned a memory of your childhood toy.

“Oh, look at that!” you picked up the small piece of candy. The packaging still boasted its classic colors of red, blue, white, and black. Turning around, you held it out to Chishiya. “I used to eat this all the time when I was a kid.”

He wrinkled his nose in disgust. This was the ninth room around the Beach that you’ve ‘investigated’—a fancy word you liked to use instead of ‘snooped around.’ “You don’t know how long that’s been there. Plus, you’ll get cavities.”

“Candy doesn’t expire,” you stuck your tongue out at him, swiftly unwrapping the sweet and popping it in your mouth. You smoothed out the wrapper, particularly the area around the illustrated rabbit.

“Somehow, I don’t think that’s true—”

“He looks like the bunny plush I had.” Chishiya knit his eyebrows in confusion before glancing at the wrapper. He shrugged, feigning indifference.

“All rabbits look the same.”

“No, idiot. This one has pointy ears instead of rounded ones.”

“What’s that?” Kuina’s voice nearly made him knock over the entire thing. He flinched, throwing a blanket over his project. Clearing his throat, he stood up and narrowed his eyes at the girl.

“What did I tell you about knocking?”

Despite his small frame blocking the table from view, Kuina side-stepped around him, swiftly pulling the cloth right off. He hissed, moving to take the music box, but Kuina was faster, swiping it off the table and bringing it up to her eye level.

“Wow,” she enunciated, dragging the word. “This is for them, isn’t it?”

“No,” he tried not to stutter. He reached for it before Kuina held it above him. Her eyes were glued to the meticulous details. “If you drop that, I will kill you next game and make it look like an accident.”

She chortled, throwing her head back. Her loudness grew on him—is what he always told himself. Being his only friend when the Beach was only starting to form, he learned quickly how to tolerate Kuina’s more bubbly personality.

“What’s it for? Their birthday coming up?”

“No. I’m just making sure all our pieces are in place.” Kuina let him nab the item back. She watched as he wrapped it in the blanket, tucking it safely back into a drawer. 

“You totally like her,” she snorted.

“No, I don’t!” It came out too fast, too loudly. Chishiya’s face was starting to redden. His lips were pressed in a thin line, eyes downcast. It took a moment for him to collect himself. “We need her for the plan.”

“Yeah, right. It’s been half a year. Whatever long game you’re playing is over,” she smirked at him, plopping on his bed. “If anything, you’re the one getting played.”

“I don’t like her that way,” he crossed his arms defensively.

“Keep telling yourself that, lover boy,” Kuina chuckled, throwing a pillow at him. Chishiya swatted it away, face beet-red.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Call you what, lover boy?”

“Kuina!”

Three soft knocks interrupted their banter. Chishiya froze when you opened the door, slipping in with a mischievous grin. Your arms were behind your back, hands hidden from their view. A faint crinkling gave Chishiya a hint as to what you were holding. 

You stepped towards him, making him instinctively block the drawer the music box was in. Your grin spread wider, making your cheeks look unbearably adorable. Wait, did he really think that?

“I have something for you,” you said almost teasingly. You thrust your hand to his chest, pressing a package of biscuits on him. He wasn’t religious, but he prayed that you couldn’t feel his heartbeat thrumming out his rib cage.

Glancing down, he gave the biscuits a curious look-over. The wrapper was pink and white, with small cartoon strawberries spread around it. Attempting to take it from you gently, his fingers grazed over the back of your hand, flustering you both. Quickly, you whipped your head towards Kuina, chucking her the other item.

She caught the lighter with ease, excitedly flicking it on. Kuina was certain the militants threw it out after the pool fire incident. Totally not your trio’s fault. “Woah! Where’d you get these?”

“I was in Tatta’s storage space,” you beamed proudly.

Chishiya’s blood curdled. He squeezed the biscuits, though still careful not to break them. Shifting his weight to one foot, he scrunched his face in distaste. “What were you doing with Tatta?”

“Nothing, we were just hanging out. Ann dragged him into the hallway for a quick conversation so I had time to ‘investigate,’” you motioned with air quotes.

“What are you hanging out with him for?” The blunt words left his mouth before he could process them. 

His heart shrivelled a little when your smile faded. Taken aback, you clasped your hands, suddenly self-conscious. “I thought he was nice and making another friend around here didn’t seem like a bad idea.”

“Well, what if he’s just another sleaze like Niragi? You know how some of the men slobber like dogs here. And you’re in a closed space with just him? Just the two of you in a room? Together? Do you know how stupid that is? What if something happened and Kuina and I were in this room and we couldn’t hear you and—”

“What Chishiya is saying—” Kuina spoke over him, sending him a sharp glare despite her pinched smile. “—is that we just want you to be careful around here. I think Tatta is a fun guy too, but don’t let your guard down that easily okay?”

You nodded wordlessly, avoiding Chishiya’s eyes. Unbeknownst to you, his look softened, fingers releasing their tight grip on the biscuits. He slouched, silently berating himself for sounding so harsh, especially after you’ve just given him a gift. Oh god, you gave him a gift! He looked back at the cookies, strawberry-flavored no doubt. Perhaps it was your attention to detail that chipped at his armor. The way you remembered how he took two teaspoons of sugar with his tea and how you’d sometimes take his hoodie after a rough game and bring it back smelling of fabric softener.

Just normal things good friends would do for each other. Because that’s what you were—good friends.

“Chishiya?”

“What?” He blinked slowly, glancing at Kuina through silver hair framing his face. 

“I said I’m gonna get us drinks from the bar. You sound like you need it.” She stood up, motioning for you to take her place on the bed. You shot her a small smile, though your mood has obviously been dampened. 

Kuina passed near Chishiya, lowering her voice to whisper, “Fix your mess.”

When the door shut with a soft click, it was quiet for a few awkward moments. The room felt like a held breath, with Chishiya still standing, holding the biscuits like an idiot, while you were sitting on his bed, regarding him a huge eye sore in the middle of the spacious hotel room. Being a high-profile diamonds player bought him certain luxuries, despite how unnecessarily flashy he deemed them. 

“I know you’re just looking out for me, but you really could be nicer sometimes.” He almost didn’t catch what you said, your voice soft. “I just wanted to get you something nice.”

He sighed, more so at his own stupidity. He pushed himself off the drawer and sat beside you, your knees touching. Pinching the corner of the wrapper, he ripped the packaging open, angling the biscuits towards you. Your knee tensed beside him, making guilt claw at his stomach more.

“Take one,” he said, almost demandingly. You huffed, gingerly taking a piece. It was a small, pillow-shaped shell. You bit into it, bringing your hand back to look at the strawberry filling inside. Chishiya hummed in approval as soon as the sweet cream hit his tongue.

Wordlessly, you shared the biscuits—his own form of apology. You scooted closer to him, a silent act of forgiveness he quickly picked up on. Always the clever man, yet he could never figure himself out.

“I just don’t want anything bad to happen to you. Anyone with eyes can see how beautiful you are. If anyone here tried anything on you, I’d have to put rat poison in their alcohol. Do you know how troublesome that is?” he wrinkled his nose, pointedly munching.

A grin crept into your face. Your eyes flitted towards his face, dark brown eyes meeting yours. “You think I’m beautiful?”

Chishiya was stunned for a second. Blood rushed to his cheeks and the furrow in his brows deepened. He stammered, “No. No! That’s not what I meant. I mean that I’m just worried about you!”

You brought your face just a tad bit closer to his. “You worry about me?”

“No, no! I mean, you’re just a good ally and I don’t have any other strong feelings about you. I’m doing this for the sake of our alliance—”

He didn’t notice as you took the last biscuit, gingerly pushing it against his lips. He froze, eyes wide as he took in your appearance. An orange glow from the setting sun wrapped around your silhouette. You looked heavenly, like an angel beckoning him to the next life. Despite all logic screaming at him, he would gladly take your hand and go wherever that may be. 

You pushed the biscuit past his lips, the soft pair almost chasing after your fingertip as you pulled away. Curling your finger, you wiped the corner of his mouth with the edge of your knuckles. His breath stilled in his chest.

Chishiya leaned closer, your pull towards him magnetic. Shakily, he brought a hand up, about to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. He’s seen this move once before, during a promotional commercial for a drama. He was reviewing for his finals at the time, taking only a few seconds to stare coldly at his roommate because of how loud the TV was. Evidently, he never put it into practice before.

“Ow!” you jolted back, hands cupping your face. Somehow, despite his brilliant mind, he accidentally poked you in the eye. You grit your teeth in pain, globs of tears running down your cheek. 

“Shit, I’m sorry!” He tried prying your eyes away from your face, using his free arm to wrap around your back. “I’m so sorry. Shit. Don’t rub it, it’ll get worse. Come here.”

Assisting you through your blurry vision, he managed to walk you to his bathroom. He turned the faucet on, making you bend over the sink. Forcing stillness into his hand, he caught the water, gently splashing it against your reddening eye. You hissed, jolting back at the contact, though a firm hand on your back kept you in place.

“I’m so sorry. I really didn’t mean to.” The distress was evident in his voice. You’ve never seen him in such shambles before, not even during games where he was at the brink of death.

“I know, ‘Shiya. It’s okay,” you managed to smile at him. He wiped your eyes with a soft towel, bringing it down for a second to gently grip your chin. He nudged your head up, only enough for him to check on your eye. He let out a deep sigh before pressing the towel back. At least the pain has died down a bit now. “How bad is it?”

“It’s not fatal.”

You snorted, hitting him lightly on the shoulder. His lips twitched almost into a grin, though he was still slouched over in embarrassment. “I can’t believe this is the thanks I get for feeding you.”

“I… I-I didn’t mean to. Honestly!” He shoved his other hand into his hoodie pocket. Suddenly, the floor was the most interesting thing in the room. You chuckled lightly at his antics. There was something so boyish about the way he stood, almost as if he wanted his hoodie to swallow him whole.

You brought your hand up, wrapping it around his on the towel. His cheeks heated up, though still defiant in meeting your gaze. You stroked the back of his hand with your thumb, surprised that he hasn’t pulled away yet.

“I’m sorry I poked your eye. I was just trying to…” he trailed off. How was he even going to explain himself out of this one? “There was dirt on your face. You should take a bath from time to time.”

“I do take baths!” you exclaimed, swatting at him again. You jabbed a finger to his chest, tone riddled with tease. “You’re just so obsessed with me.”

He finally allowed himself to smile, the smile that made everything feel normal again. At that moment, you weren’t players in the Borderland fighting for your life every other day. You were just two friends, for now. Chishiya is a tough nut to crack, but between your laughter sounding like tinkling bells and the euphoric buzz he gets from being around you, he’d be able to sort himself out. He just needs to take it one step at a time, starting with making that music box sing for you again. 

Because that's what good friends do. God, he was such a good friend.

Back in the main room, the entrance door swung open, followed by the sound of glass bottles clinking against each other. Kuina proudly declared, “I got us the stuff!”

“Did you bring ice?” Chishiya called out to her.

“Of course!” Even from the bathroom, you could hear her huff.

“Good, because we need a bunch of it here.”

[colourful-void]

alright closing umineko for the night!! i had a great time with it so far!! i really like the writing style, and for the most part its actually a lot less dense than i was expecting. I thought it might be some house of leaves stuff but no this is pretty easy to read, at least so far! im rlly glad for that like it doesn't feel too simple, not too complicated, its good!

current character thoughts run down, though i've barely started so i dont know much yet: ginzo: he sucks he totally sucks and im convinced that he made some kidna deal w/ beatrice in order to take advantage of the earthquake and war and such. not entirely convinced hes not about to just murder the whole family bcs he seems like he would do that. krauss: also sucks. just a real dick, but in like. he's a standard asshole really. natsuhi: much in the same vien, but she's got that matriach of the family thing going on i hope will b explored more <3 jessica: she's neat i like her! looking forward to more on her. Eva: i was digging for her a while and then i saw how she treated shannon and it went out the window hideyoshi: ive yet to expirence a thought on this man George: he's very tropey in a good way and i enjoy he's friendly guy swag. looking forward to it inevitably falling to pieces rudolf: DICK!! kyrie: girl leave your husband. i can treat u better <3, im glad she has some decency but my mind aint set on her yet battler: HES SO CRINGEEEE <333333333333333333333333333333333333333333 sometimes he does genuinely offput me but mostly he's just stupid <3 rosa: be a bit nicer to ur daughter, but beyond that shes chill i think. no big thoughts here. i do like her dynamic in relation to the rest of the siblings so far maria: MARIA MY DARLING MY DEAREST SHES SO SWEET AND SILLY AND CLEARLY OMINOUS I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT DARK MAGICS OVERTAKE HER OR WHATEVER <333 maria for whatever the fuck she wants 2024 love her so much no crazy thoughts on the head butler or doctor but i think in a different world the butler and ginzo had crazy gay sex shannon: shes soooo sweetie <3 suspiciously so this game wants me to like her so bad and i do <3. i am aware of one key spoilery fact about shannon uncovered in some content warnings i recieved, but its kinda fun seeing the set up for that! everyone be nicer to my girl kanon: hes suspcious but overly so and i wonder what his deal is. i also think all the servants need to be treated better this fucking furnature stuff <3 its awful i love it narratively gohda: i think he would kill someone with very little hesitation. i wanna try that panna cotta. kumasawa: shes like a grandma to me <333 i like her!!

i havent met beatrice yet but im looking forward to it she looks super neat.

i also apperciate how slow burn this is, a few hours in and very little has happened yet it's nice. there's already a lot building but like. nothing big yet it's nice. i like it. it feels like it's moving at exactly the pace it wants to and i enjoy it a lot. the sound design is also rlly good. the music is really nice a couple times i got distracted and just listened to it in the bg. the sfx r nice too.

i do not regret my sprite choice i like these designs they're fun, but i do think maria looks a little off for her alleged age of 9, but it's easy to ignore after a min or two.ironically when i was loading the game and saw her on the steam page it def aligned better, but at the cost battler to my eyes is now yassified. he cant be a pretty boy to me he's too lame.

voice acting is great everyones putting fucking everyting into it and i enjoy that. fully commited to the enviroment and its great.

where i left off: everyone just finished having lunch! kumasawa covered for shannon not knowing the red sauce's ingredients. that's all for now! not sure when ill paly more, probably tomorrow, but its been good!! good game so far i like this setg up!! im also eagar to get more into the murder and violence and witch stuff but like, it does a good joib of setting up the characters so i dont feel impatient, and unlike a lot of games w/ murder n mystery that get right into it i kinda find it refreshing how slow this one is to start its like we all know itll get there so the tension of everyone being relatively calm is great.

anyway, umineko day 1: it was good =D

[thefiendlord]

🎢Punch-Out Wii Very Specific HCs: Annual Trans-Only Get-Together 🏳️‍⚧️

I am so bored and tired at work, so this is what I'm going to do on break. Idk where the idea came from

After pulling from a hat, this year's trip was Kennywood, a theme park near Pittsburgh because it's my favorite place and it's close enough to New York.

Glass Joe (trans man) 🥖🇫🇷

-Got a sunburn because Don's sunscreen was fuckang expired (thanks)

-Split a plate of funnel cake with Disco and gained a life ruining addiction to it

-Threw a fit because the Black Widow was closed by the time they reached that side of the park (secret adrenaline junky)

-Fell asleep during the 2 hour line to the Exterminator so Bull carried him on his back

Disco Kid (trans masc, bigender) 🇺🇸🪩

-Rode the Music Land Express 13 times and screamed the loudest each time (they make you scream to make it go faster)

-Threw up his half of the funnel cake on the merry-go-round (lol)

-Got really antsy during the Exterminator line and started breakdancing, accidentally kicked Hippo's ass and got his ass beat in the ring the next day

-Stunted on all of the carnival games and everyone had to split up carrying the huge plushies

King Hippo (trans man) 🇼🇸🦛

-Started an impromptu candied apple eating contest with a group of people at the park and stunted on everyone

-Unfortunately, could only fit on the Log Jammer and Exterminator. Fortunately, those are in the top 5 best rides, so. A W?

-Stopped the group to pet all the dogs in the park

-So pissed at Disco for kicking him that he tried to rig the basketball game against him by bending the hoop. It did not work.

Great Tiger (trans masc, agender) 🐯🇮🇳

-Used his clones to take up seats when he didn't want to share ride cars with strangers.

-Tried to cheat the carnival games with thaumaturgy, but they were so #rigged it didn't work.

-Wanted to try all of the food shits at the park, and made Don pay for it after he took the last spot on the Comet before it closed for maintenance.

-Almost got heat stroke after forgetting to drink water for the first 4 hours of the trip.

Don Flamenco (trans masc, genderfluid) 🇪🇸🌹

-Paid for the tickets and made sure everyone remembered that for the whole trip.

-Brought all the meds and extra clothes. Half of the meds were expired, though, since they'd been in the WVBA first aid kit for the past decade and he was too cheap to buy some.

-Got really pissy with the staff when they tried to tell him there wasn't a "fast pass".

-Lost his flipflops on the Swings and cried about it.

Bald Bull (trans man) 🐂🇹🇷

-Completely stone-faced on all of the rides, was too scared to ride the water rides, though.

-Yelled at Tiger until he drank some water, and got mad when he tried to drink lemonade instead.

-Carried Joe through half the park because he got tired after walking up all the gotdam hills.

-Ate $20 worth of Potato Patch fries and got a tummy ache. Had a great time, though.

Thanks 4 reading

[belmottetower]

ur post about jamie’s loan has me thinking soooo many thoughts but the main thing im confused about is this: how was jamie able to get on the starting line-up so quickly after returning from his loan to richmond? city obviously hadn’t originally intended to recall jamie for a while as of 106 — jamie’s loan being pulled and him actually being sent back is presented like a surprising piece of information for everyone in the team, and i just can’t interpret that as “his contract was expiring soon, he just went back a week earlier than normal”. it felt like ted (at the very least) was setting up jamie to stay for a while after that, both strategically and socially. so, if he had spent much less time in richmond than intended (and thus probably developed a lot less than intended), how did he manage to start in richmond’s relegation match? it could have been city trying to give him more minutes against a lower ranked team, but then why would they start him AND let him play the whole game even after it was tied 1-1 if he’s not a consistent part of the starting line up? im a silly little american who knows nothing about european football, but it just doesn’t make sense how jamie could go from “we’re going to give you so few minutes that we basically have to loan u out or else you’re just wasting time” to “you’re going to be on the starting line up/close to it” so quickly once returning to city? was it just him learning to be a team player or is the show just getting fuzzy w the details? (also that was so long im sorry this is just a Very Specific Question and im trying to get it across properly)

This is referring to things from my earlier loan ask, so linking that here.

First of all, I am sure that Jamie's loan was meant to go until the end of the season. However, a loan can be terminated at any point during the season if both parties agree to it. So in this case, City saw he wasn't playing every possible minute with Richmond and they said to Richmond, "if you aren't going to play him, we want him back. We'd rather be the ones training and not using him if YOU'RE not going to use him." They were the ones that instigated the recall of Jamie, Rebecca just simply had to agree to it on behalf of Richmond and Jamie goes home. (Let's not worry about the fact that his agent would have been involved in this process because 2 seconds of digging in that direction makes the plot fall apart.)

But Jamie had been playing for Richmond for almost a full season at this point, from the summer of 2019 to what has to be around the February of 2020. He was there for over nine months of the season, and he went back to City when they only had a couple of months left.

In 1.08, when he visits Keeley, it's late March and he tells her that City were in town playing West Ham. He says "I had ten touches, I had two completed dribbles, and in the 89th minute they let me take a free kick." This implies to me that he was being brought on as a substitute at that point. Because ten touches, for a forward, is not very many during a full 90 minutes. And then the "They let me" in terms of taking a free kick sounds to me like he's still very much not a major power player, more like he's been given a chance, like "give the kid a turn, see how he handles it."

But it still feels to me like City valued Jamie as a player, and when they got him back after around nine months of a loan, they decided to give him a few more chances and see what he could do. And if he's succeeding for them in games as a sub, it's more likely that he will start the next match.

And the thing about the Richmond relegation match is that it's implied City had already secured the Premier League title, weeks before. They are not awarded the trophy at the end of the match. They're not celebrating having won the League. There's no commentary from Arlo and Chris about how City need this to secure the title, unlike they way they explain it in 3.11 and 3.12. So Ted's dressing room speech about giving the champs 90 minutes of hell implies to me that City were ALREADY the league champions, that they'd won it a little earlier in the season. Hopefully it's clear to everyone by now that with a league table, this is pretty common, if someone gets enough points that it is mathematically impossible for other teams to catch up. 

In real life, this year City won the league with three matches left to play. And in this circumstance, once the thing is already won, Pep will shake up the starting line ups quite dramatically and give different players the chance to play. For example, Cole Palmer, who I mentioned in the other post? He started for City in their matches against Chelsea and Brentford at the end of the season, AFTER City had already secured the title, when there were no consequences to City winning or losing. They won against Chelsea and Palmer got an assist on the winning goal, and they actually lost to Brentford in the final match of the season but it didn't matter. Pep uses a high rotation anyway - City does not have a fixed starting eleven, it changes all the time, Palmer has started a handful of other matches in various competitions - but this is very likely what happened to Jamie in terms of the Richmond match. It's the only match we know for an absolute fact that he started in for City, and it's probably because it was a game where the line-up could be changed around and experimented with to give different players opportunities, because they weren't "playing for anything."

Basically, in summary - Jamie played for Richmond for 9-10 months (depending on how early he came in preseason.) By the end of that stay he had played a lot more minutes by then than he ever had before even if he didn't get to stay the whole length of the season. City knew he'd improved and recalled him, deciding that if Richmond weren't going to utilise him, they'd prefer he be with them in Manchester to use when they want. They start using him as a sub in the last couple of months of the season, and he proves himself to be a valuable player for them. So he gets to play more minutes, maybe gets subbed on earlier each game, and eventually he gets to start a few matches, especially ones after City has already won the title and Jamie gets to play the match just for the experience.

In terms of being a team player, I fairly strongly believe that at City, this would have been a given for Jamie no matter what. Jamie got full of himself playing as a 1-up-front striker at Richmond, maybe in a 4-2-3-1 formation, but that's not how he would have ever played at City. Pep's favourite formation during that era of City is 4-3-3 and that's what Jamie was playing in for the Richmond match, he was part of a line of three (the formations are on the Arlo White cheat sheet) against Richmond's 4-4-2. City in this shape favours high possession and passing, so Jamie would have to have been succeeding within the style Pep wanted, i.e., being a team player and passing a lot and not acting as an individual star taking control of the match.

Jamie at Richmond was a selfish player largely because he didn't see the other players as good enough. He saw himself as a cut above them and their only value was to facilitate him in taking control of the match. He's not actually wrong about the skill level objectively, and even Roy admits it in 1.04 - that he knows he should be passing to Jamie but he can't stand Jamie's attitude about it. Because shaping the team to facilitate a star striker like that is not inherently bad football, not if the player isn't a cunt about it - it's a bit like what we saw with Zava, which looked ridiculous to us as viewers but was not actually a situation that anyone other than Jamie resented because Zava made the others feel valued, even if it felt fake to us. But look. Footballers do understand that some players are just better than others, and if your star striker is a nice person who makes everyone feel valued and treats people as proper teammates, there's nothing wrong with the tactic being "get the ball to that person and let them take charge." 

Richmond was Jamie's first taste of being that heroic superstar, where he was the one with all the glory, and because he didn't see the rest of them as on his level, he became a bad "team player" due to not recognising the part the rest of the team played in his success, or helping them improve (playing with people better than you should make you better, generally!) or believing that any of the others could achieve anything. He felt he was doing it all by himself. And George Cartrick clearly also had no interest in training the team in any other way. Very much "just get the ball to Tartt, he's the only one who's any good, and try not to fuck up in the process" as opposed to using Jamie's prowess to elevate EVERYONE. 

At City, where Jamie probably wasn't the best player on the team, where the standards were more equally at his level or better, this factor is not an issue. That's not how Pep trains them, it's not how Pep thinks. Jamie knows that he's not the solo star there. He knows that all the other great players will be contributing to making things happen, that everyone is smart and talented and aren't going to fuck up. Whether he liked it or not, he would have had trust in the way that playing style works, knowing that it's what's being asked of him from Pep and what the situation calls for. But Jamie didn't trust the Richmond players to be good enough to contribute. We see this Sam a lot - his attacks on Sam are often because Sam has failed to put a pass where Jamie wanted it, or missed a shot in training, or whatever. This is not an excuse for his behaviour but it is clear evidence that Jamie is frustrated because the rest of the team isn't at his level. And unlike season 3, he has no interest in working with them on improving, or showing them how best to play with him. Being a good team player isn't always about sharing the ball equally or whatever, it's about working as a team to feed each other's strengths - that's how season 3 Jamie can be both a team player and a total star player at the same time.

Honestly, to me, Jamie making that extra pass in 1.10 wasn't anything to do with Ted, aside from narratively for us as viewers. That's just how City plays football. That's Pep's influence, not Ted's. Ted sees it happen and thinks he's done something to change Jamie's attitude but in my opinion, Jamie is just playing the way Pep wants him to, because he actually values Pep's opinion about tactics in a way he didn't value Ted's. 

There is no way in hell Jamie went from age 13, or whenever he was scouted, to age 23, being a consistently selfish ball hog style player at Man City. Lots of players want to be stars, but I believe that the level we see in season 1 is just how he thought he needed to play at Richmond, because he felt like he was the only one who knew what he was doing and making anything happen on the pitch, and then of course he liked how it felt to have all that attention on him. But the way Jamie was playing at Richmond is simply not how City play football, and season 3 makes that canon to the Ted version of City too, not just an unfounded real life football comparison. City in the show are coached by Real Pep and play Pep's version of total football. That's what Jamie was doing when he made the extra pass,  and it's his experience with Pep's total football that allows Jamie to help Richmond so much in season 3.

[hazelthevixen]

Temporary inactivity notice + Birthday and halloween!

It was my birthday on the 29th last month, I had a good time ^-^ I was 24 before, but you know what's funnier than 24? *snort* 25! XD and that's what I became! =D https://youtu.be/n7q_vNIz8HI I went on the train to the big city and we had a good meal at pizza hut :3 I had bbq chicken wings, onion rings, nachos and salad, j20, and a pineapple hawaiian pizza! yum! ^w^ It was very big so my helper and I shared some and took the rest home :3 Then we went to a science museum! seen some interesting things here including a cool robot, wish I got a recording of it cos it was funny too! The science museum had some toys and games there that we were playing, there was also a shop where I bought some goodies :3 Then we got some birthday cake on the way home but it was time for my helper/carer to go as it was getting pretty late so we both went home.. ^-^; but it's alright we still had time to make some birthday wishes! My good friend Wolfypoof was kind enough to sing happy birthday to me :3 she got to see the pretty unicorn cake too ^w^ if only I could share it with all my friends but my carer was away and it's not possible with online pals like Wolfy QwQ It was a really good cake but it was also very big, I dunno if I'll manage to finish it all before it expires! I'll have to see.. ^-^; But it was a nice birthday we were playing vrchat and watching House Of Magic and The Wild Robot throughout my bday and halloween :3 I have pictures! =D This bluesky thread shows what I got for my 25th birthday including the cake, gifts, and pizza hut ^-^ And on halloween I was fursuiting when I went guising so we have a cool photo of that too ^w^ We had good convos, good candies, and good jokes and laughs when I visited everyone in my fox form ^-^ it was great! Just so you guys know, I will be on hiatus everywhere for a whole week, starting around the 9th or 10th of november so I wont be active for a while. This is because I'm finally gonna be able to follow my dreams on travelling the world! >w< so exciting, can't wait! I'm finally making progress on my goals, I really hope I'll get to do travelling much more often starting from today ^w^ I want to enjoy exploring the world so much that I'll appreciate home when I get back! >:3 I especially wanna appreciate my country more when I return from all them holidays abroad ^w^ Been in scotland almost all my life so it'll be good to go back to spain again ^-^ As some of you may or may not know, I went to spanish islands when I was very very little, and I loved it! So I'm really looking forward to going back there again, this time to an island I haven't visited yet! :D Though I'm a bit nervous cos I'm going with a group of peeps I haven't met yet, I just hope they'll be kind <:3 I'm also a very shy in general, heck even in vrchat I'm shy, I only talk to people I know on there QwQ but I really hope I'll get to make some friends at least.. ÚwÙ I talk to alot of people both online and offline and have had alotta good convos with alot of people, but it can be hard to make friends in the offline world sometimes, especially since most people do small talk and I don't really like small talk :< I prefer deep meaningful conversations. I do have many acquaintances in the offline world, just not enough offline friends yet.. X.X; I have made friends before tho! but sadly we kinda lost touch :< but hopefully I'll make some good offline friends I wont lose touch with, would be great <:3 Anywho I'm off to tenerife for about a week, I might be here for a short while before then but on the 10th I'll be on hiatus for the whole week. Discord friends, if you're lucky I might be able to pop in to see yous occasionally ^-^ If I'm not busy that is.. :o but yeh, gotta chase my dreams so I'll see you guys when I return home! And to all my fluffies (aka my friends and fans) I love you guys :3 I'll trust that you'll protect my accounts from the haters while I'm gone UwU Your support means a ton! Anyways, see ya!

Please be nice when commenting! I refuse to be criticised so please accept that. If you're gonna be mean, don't say anything at all. Thankies for checking out my post! Meep meep! ヽ(◕ヮ◕)ﾉ I'm on other places too! ^-^

Posted using PostyBirb

[sentofight]

plots please / between Machipyon and Miss Militesi Lady Princess-ish

dear lord, help us.

what if agito cycle thread? machipyon is somewhat cheerful than game machymachy sobs. if so, he will definitely visit her more often and will get into trouble no problem if it means he can befriend this lonely girl. he does not care who she is or why she is here, you can't just lock up a pretty girl and expect no one will complain smh. looks at kurpapa, how dare you? crime against beauty. you deprive the cadets from this beauty for you---gasps! for yourself!? TAI-....TAI...TAICHOU.... and this when machina gets eternally frozen and hanged over the suzaku statue in the plaza for every cadet to see. the end. jk.

ok but idle chat is like too good between the two over a tea cup? he probably asks a lot of questions without telling her about himself and she like no, no, this is not how twenty question is. eventually he fuss up and tells her about his problem with izana sobs. please. someone talk to this lad about his brother. i was going to suggest what if they actually meet before, but i cant think of a way for machina still not a cadet to meet someone like bomber gi--rude, like Crosseyra; the enemy nation's princess. unless he meet her during his training before they assigned him to a class? maybe she saw him and the other cadets donning the grey mantles and the second time she sees him, he is wearing the dark blue one, and when he actually saw her himself he was wearing the crimson one. cross making a joke about that and he's ??? i dont get it ???? he does not know she saw him before kfjsdlfkjsdlf

LISTEN. WHAT IS HER FATE WHEN KURAPAPA PERISHED HEROICLY IN BATTLE? i need to know. because ... what....ahem. what if machina / l'ciel came and just whisked her back to milites on the crystal order ? ? ? man got access to the academy, walks in, changes to his l'ciel form, burst into her room 'let's go. the crystal's order'.

cross: wait a minute? chocobo nerd? chocobo nerd right? the same guy who yappers about chocobos 24/7?

incognitus: w-waht? no? shut up. let's go. zip it or i will make you.

cross: lmao i'd like you to try, smart pants.

incognitus: . . . fuck. just let's go.

also i offer chocobo ride. limited time only. this will expire once machypyon realizes this. what if she was to be relocated somewhere else? using the airships would be eye emoji for milities so traveling on foot. or on chocobos. maybe for a while until she can return to the academy. like, she is hiding because of the whole thing with Cid, no? what if he send spies or actual 'investigation' team asking to search for the princess' whereabout and not to cause Khalia and the academy trouble, she was relocated somewhere safer for the time being? cough cough elite guard ofc machypopopopo (and other zeroes lmao for favorism eight and king lmao)

we can try other verses, too? i don't mind writing for genpact but it has been ages since i played the game but i always welcome the opportunity to research and find ideas and things that work. that being said since genpact is cross main ver as i see on her blog hmhmhmh i need to think about machy's verse *rubs chin* going by machy's stats in type zero ... he is second in hp, 4th in mp, 3rd attack, 3rd defense, 2nd fire magic, 4th ice magic, 3rd lightning magic, 7th defensive magic so hmhmh. i was debating to go with ether pyro or electro but to go with the suzaku theme and that he was 'revived' for the phoenix motif and all so pyro it is. i still don't know which nation fits him but could figure that out as we go on (because of his features and surname we can assume he is of asian descent maybe Liyue? ;;;). i will rack my brain over this and come back to you if you are interested in writing in this verse :3c

as for their relationship all game man. cross can be his big sister he never had because as ass he is, he pushed away the good big bro he had. sobs. rivals? because let's face it, he will be anyone's rival if he sensed they are better than him. he gotta fight back. listen, the chaotic dynamic between them is chef kiss. their bickering is funny and i live for it. i dont mind if this does not turn to otome route and they just remained platonic friends like i die for you bitch its ok. the social link go meme "Machina now will die for you" lmao. cross can be his mentor too sobs. "control your emotions, cadet" kind of haha. she had suffered far more than he would imagine and yet she is so regal and graceful in face of everything hes just 'what dis power?'

send plot and imma ramble rose some ideas | accepting | @vygiler

[blackjackkent]

LMAO. The group got absolutely toasted by some of the security systems at the front of the Selune outpost and I'm probably going to have to reload, but as soon as Gale expired, THIS happened.

"Well met! I am a magical projection of Gale of Waterdeep, and if you see this manifestation, that means I have prematurely perished. However, for reasons that cannot be disclosed, it is of vital importance that my death be remedied at your earliest convenience. You may rest assured that I do not speak out of self preservation alone - many lives depend on my return to the living within the span of two days. I trust I have made myself clear?"

...Gale, you are so extra lmao.

Karlach had the lead in this conversation because I had clicked on her in a desperate attempt to get out of the environmental turn that was nuking everyone, and she looked utterly bemused by this whole conversation.

"How am I supposed to bring you back to life?"

"I have upon my deceased person a magical item that can accomplish my return, but such is the value and rarity that it is protected by a multi-level security protocol. I will now explain the protocol. Step one is to retrieve from my person a pouch I wear over my heart. Next you must unthread the purple seam that seals it in a counterclockwise fashion. Do not touch any other colored strand. Inside the pouch, you will find a folded letter and a tiny flute. Unfold the letter, and note the markings in the top and bottom corners. These are the notes you will need to play. Starting from the bottom right, play the notes in correct order - clockwise this time. Upon completion of the tune, a magma mephit will appear, which will pose the following question: I'ss k'cha t'chiss n'aga? This is Ignan for "What is my name?" The answer is "K'ha'ssji'trach'ash'. Pronounce the name correctly and the mephit will breathe on the letter. Stay clear, because the little scamp can melt metal. Words will now appear on the letter's surface, effectively turning the letter into a Scroll of True Resurrection. Use it to bring me back to life."

Oh my god.

"This is all ridiculously elaborate."

"I think ingenious is the word you're looking for. Now repeat my instructions back to me, please."

"I got it. Seams, notes, names - the lot."

"In that case, this will be an easy exercise. Step one?"

"Forget it. I'm going to resurrect you now if that's all right with you."

"Have it your way. I can only hope your memory stretches further than your patience. Best of luck with the protocol! May my cold dead hands soon be refilled with the warmth of life so they can shake yours in gratitude."

Incredible.

By the time I managed to get the game back into turn-based mode (it dropped out of it when Hector went down, I think, and then everyone just stood there getting repeatedly blasted by the Lasers of Selune), Hector and Gale were both dead, Karlach was downed, and Shadowheart was barely able to help her up and get them both back under cover. So the current state of play is Karlach (1 HP), Shadowheart (12 HP), two dead humans, a dead minotaur we were fighting when this all went down, and two really vigorous lasers.

I'd prefer not to have to reload especially after that whole spiel from Gale. XD so gonna quickly have K&S look around and see if they can find an off switch.

Gale and Hector just have their dead bodies smoking in the party inventory screen.

???????? That seems bad.

The lasers seem connected to a statue of Selune at the center of the area. I wasn't able to find an interaction point before but now that the stakes are higher maybe there's something to see.

The gem at the top is destructable which seems like a good place to start.

Shooting it from the top of the stairs seems to have turned off the lasers - and also gave Shadowheart inspiration for destroying a Selunite relic. XD

The next exciting challenge is dealing with the necrotic aura Gale is exuding, which makes it more than a little challenging to get at his security system in the first place. But we got there in the end (after a short rest so Karlach didn't keep passing out every time she got near him).

Here we go. Amusingly, we did indeed have to go through all those steps to get this whole business sorted. Luckily I already copied it all out as part of writing this post. XD The notes we had to play in the second step spell out D-E-A-D, because Gale is, as previously mentioned, incredibly extra. :P

Hector, despite currently being literally dead, got inspired by us correctly following all the instructions and getting the true resurrection scroll. Shadowheart was also inspired by us resurrecting someone. We were also able to use a Revivify scroll to get Hector up too!

Success! (I accidentally stole Gale's clothes when I took all his stuff whoops.)

OK definitely time for a long rest. XD

[skitskatdacat63]

Back in my monthly depression era ig but. Thinking about social media and art, and how their relationship has fucked with me. I'm glad I started drawing fanart and I don't regret it. And I think I've really improved my skill this past half year plus. But man it gives me such a terrible complex. That paranoia of "who even would give a shit about this" and "when will people be done with me."

I think any artist always craves some recognition and praise no matter how much you say you draw for yourself. You can draw for yourself but it's still extremely gratifying and inspiring to have people's approval or thoughts on it.I used to draw for myself more and draw so much random art, but I discussed it a lot with friends and it made it more gratifying, to have that interest. And I lost that kinda, a lot. I feel like for a bit btwn losing that and drawing fanart, I can't really remember, I didn't draw as much bcs it just felt a bit unrewarded and it felt bleh.

And then I started drawing fanart. Which felt very rewarding. I'm happy I've not ever really felt the desire to make widely "appealing" art. If you look at even the first things I posted, it's extremely niche, and that's been a lot of fun! But it's also just made me so paranoid and self conscious. What if people get tired of this. What if people find it strange. What if people find it annoying. What if I'm being repetitive. Etc. It's really irritating bcs I KNOW people have told me they find my stuff interesting and that they like it. But my brain can't help but think, what is the expiration date on this, when will it become boring. I discuss my art with people and it's fun, but that self consciousness clings to me like a parasite. Like ah I better hurry this up and enjoy it while I can before they get annoyed and tired of it.

I guess this is all to say, I don't always like my relationship with art, and I hate the way social media messes with your brain. I remember for a bit I would post my art on Instagram and do the whole hashtag game. And then realized it was messing with my relationship with art so I dropped it. And then did the same thing with Twitter, than dropped it, etc. I just hate how I can't let myself enjoy anything. Idk maybe I'm just burnt out or something, but whenever I think of drawing lately, there's just this voice being like "what's the point of even drawing this, why would anyone care." I hate you evil voice in my brain!!!! It's not even a thing about notes, and I feel greedy even simply admitting any of this. I think it's more of a craving of a deeper connection and discussion. Which is what I always seek when I create art. But social media makes you think about numbers and attention and makes it unhealthy and makes you feel guilty for wanting something that's pretty reasonable.

Blah blah blah anyways don't reply to this like, oh you need to fix your relationship w art by taking a break from socmed! It's just this continual cycle and maybe one day I'll break it. But sometimes it just hits harder some days. I just want to stop feeling cringe. I hate it cause internally I'm like "I am cringe but I am free" but that only has to do with actually creating the stuff. Posting about it is the trap I think. Again though, it's natural to crave discussion and approval, but putting myself out there makes me want to curl up in a ball. I miss the days when I was younger and creating all kinds of random art and forcing it upon people with absolutely no shame. But now it's like. I toss my art into the room and shut the door and hide behind it with bated breath. And it often feels like any conversation I have just sates me for a tiny bit and then I go back to feeling empty. Is it ungrateful? Or is it just natural to want to keep having and partaking in a good thing?

Someone sent me advice on this feeling at some point, about how its better to talk to people individually rather than just on main. And I agree! I had a lot of fun the last third of last year. And for some reason it's just felt different ever since the new year began. I just don't know how to recover, and to start having fun like that again. I've drawn a lot of things I've immensely enjoyed since the year began, but for some reason, which I can't really parse, have had way worse self loathing and insecurity about it all. I just wanna recover my joy back :( is that too much to ask

Tldr; yay art improvement! Complex ideas! Much discussion! However: nay! Makes me feel cringe! Makes me feel like I'm running on limited time! Makes me crave too much!

[spocktheestallion]

why joel was right to save ellie bc i have a lot of opinions and by god i’m gonna share em

so since the show has premiered i’ve seen this debate flare up again and a lot of people saying joel “robbed the world of a cure” when he saved ellie but lets be real, the fireflies were never gonna make that cure.

first off in the original game the hospital and operating room were FILTHY. and yes in the remaster they retconned it to be clean but that just seems silly to me. the fireflies had so little infrastructure that they were wiped out by ONE angry old man in a single night, where are they getting hospital cleaning crews? where are they getting the supplies to properly and i mean PROPERLY sanitize a working OR? more importantly WHO were the medical staff? what were their qualifications? to pull off what they wanted they would’ve needed a team of brilliant scientists specializing in different specific fields and i doubt any of them had been to med school recently. the outbreak was over 20 years old by that point, and medicine is a continually evolving field. those licenses were EXPIRED and even if they had experience during the pandemic it likely would’ve been in field medicine, which is not the same as epidemiology or neuroscience or any of the things they would’ve needed specializing in to get a cure. also the fact that they were saying “we’re gonna make a vaccine!” was another red flag, bc fungal infections aren’t even treated w vaccines. it just goes to show they didn’t know what they were doing. they were just reckless and desperate and ellie would’ve died needlessly.

secondly killing ellie especially right off the bat would make NO sense. what if they find out later on they need a live subject or more samples or whatever? well too late your only subject is dead. why wouldn’t they do blood tests? imaging? or if the cordyceps is only in the brain you can still do a biopsy without killing the person. again, these people didn’t know what they were doing. they were grasping at straws and even if they had gone through with their original plan they probably wouldn’t have been able to synthesize a cure anyway. the sample would’ve expired or been contaminated in the dirty hospital or they would’ve fucked up their sample through ignorance. the whole rushing straight to pulling ellie’s brain out was ridiculous. they would’ve killed a kid needlessly without a second thought.

which brings me to my next point. the fireflies aren’t exactly cut and dry good guys either. i may be reaching w this and i need to rewatch the premiere episode to confirm this but they don’t seem all that picky about their targets and civilians seem to get caught up in them a little too easy. the fireflies aren’t super concerned about human life if it gets in the way of their cause, i mean they were recruiting young kids and giving them weapons just like fedra did. there’s a reason tommy left them high and dry. they’re extremists and they don’t care who they hurt or exploit so long as it serves their cause. they aren’t philanthropists and they FOR SURE would not have been giving out that cure out of the goodness of their hearts. they would’ve gatekept it to themselves and they absolutely would’ve used it as a recruiting tool or political bargaining chip.

but more importantly even in the very unlikely situation they COULD make a successful cure AND mass produce it AND move it cross country which they clearly don’t have the resources for, there’s no way fedra would’ve let them get away with it. their fascist control is all justified in the name of preventing infection, if the disease is no longer a threat that’s a massive blow to fedra’s power. they might’ve been chasing around fireflies for setting off a few car bombs or whatever but if you think fedra isn’t going full extermination mode if they find out the fireflies have a cure you’re kidding yourself. and we’ve clearly established the fireflies would be crushed if they had fedras full attention given that they were pretty much eradicated by one guy in a single night.

and if we’ve learned anything from our own covid pandemic, it’s that if you want to effectively immunize a whole population it needs to be WIDESPREAD. you can’t just treat a few people and call it a day, EVERYONE needs to take the cure or the disease is going to survive and mutate until it can come back in a treatment-resistant variant again and again and again. and after a 20 year outbreak the kind of infrastructure you need to make that happens is gone. it just doesn’t exist anymore. fedra is probably the only group with the level of organization and infrastructure anywhere CLOSE to being able to achieve that kind of feat and i doubt even they could, and even if they could they wouldn’t.

so the fireflies were NEVER gonna be able to make a cure in the first place, they were NEVER gonna be able to mass produce and distribute it, they were NEVER going to be handing it out to anyone they weren’t tight with, and even if they had been well equipped philanthropists who could make a cure and were actually giving it out freely fedra would’ve crushed them immediately.

and i’ve also seen people argue that either way it should’ve been ellie’s choice but i disagree. ellie was a traumatized CHILD with severe survivors guilt. she was not mature enough or in the right headspace to make that kind of decision. JOEL was the closest thing to a legal guardian she had, and it was HIS responsibility to protect her until she was old enough to make decisions like that for herself AND HE DID. a kid should not be allowed to make that choice even if they want to because they’re a KID. also the fireflies weren’t gonna let joel live anyway, i’m pretty sure they were planning to kill him even if he complied.

and ultimately it’s not like joel was considering all this when he made his choice, he saved ellie because he LOVED her. like i’m sure he picked up on some red flags and knew things were sketch and realized the fireflies would probably fail and she’d die for nothing but more than anything he went back bc that was HIS BABY and he wasn’t letting desperate assholes sacrifice her for their cause. “save who you can save” remember? maybe you can’t single handedly change the world or make some miracle cure but you can do what you can for the people you love and maybe that’s enough. maybe you can never make the world go back to the way it was and maybe you SHOULDN’T but you can take it as it is one step at a time and you can do it with the family you’ve made. i think that’s a much better takeaway and i don’t like how the “joel was selfish and did the objectively bad and wrong thing” narrative in tlou2 minimizes that.

[honeesucker]

Pairing: Alpha!Bokuto Kōtarō x F!omega reader

Genre: A/B/O AU 🐾 | Smut, 18+ // minors DNI!

WC: 3,057

My whole body was shivering despite it being a sweltering sunny day, my mind was hazy and clouded with the need to submit to an Alpha. 

To be overtaken, pounded into until I was a dumb mess of omega mush and knotted until I was fat with pups.

Fucking hormones and omega instincts.

Fucking expired heat suppressants.

Stupid fucking idiot me for not noticing until it was too late.

My rational mind fought off the swarm of nuisance thoughts as I hurried my way back to my apartment carefully avoiding anyone’s gaze, suffocating my scent glands in a thick hooded sweater and scarf I had kept at the bakery for the unexpected colder days. It didn’t do much to ward off the curious glances and sniffs from the passing Alphas and others on the street, but luckily none acted on instincts, I didn’t stick around long enough to trigger anything in them.

My thighs were sticking together uncomfortably beneath my summer dress as the slick pooled in my panties and ran down the sides. The friction against my sensitive core only added to the ache, and I had to fight every ounce of instinct in me to hold back the whimpers, to not just fall on the ground and present myself to the next suitable Alpha that crossed my path.

I just needed to get home unscathed and get on my pharmacy app to order a fresh batch of suppressants, wait out a week for them to take full affect and I’ll be good to return to my normal, uncomplicated life.

I had been lucky in avoiding anymore people. No one was waking along the final stretch that led to my apartment building; a high-rise nestled just outside of the main district of downtown but still fairly luxurious for an apartment building. After a rough time in my earlier years out on my own, I decided once my bakery was successful enough I would splurge and put myself in a comfortable apartment with extra building security for my own peace of mind. I made my way to the door where the Beta doorman was waiting with it open for me, smiling until he caught the edge of my currently overwhelming scent.

“Quick, quick in miss Y-N,” Ferris ushered me through the door and shut it behind us. Walking me to the empty elevator and pushed my floor, nearly the top, at 27 of 35. “You shouldn’t be out wandering around in such a state, it isn’t safe for you!” The older man patted my hands in his with a worried expression. I just smiled and nodded along to his worrying over me.

“I know Mr. Ferris,” I sighed, “there was an unfortunate mishap with my medication so I’m gonna be staying cooped up for a bit.” He just nodded and ushered me along, and I gave a small wave and smile as the doors closed and he gave me one final wave off. I sighed, releasing the death grip I had on the jacket around me, still covering my scent glands as best as I could, but not with so much force around my throat. I’m surprised I didn’t pass out from self-asphyxiation on the way home.

After a few minutes in the elevator my floor was finally reached with a gentle ding! and I was hurrying out into the hall to make sure I was alone. With no one around I felt safe enough to walk briskly to my apartment without any further paranoia. I was reaching my door, just about to press in my key code and slink into a week of needy depression when I heard the door slighty adjacent to mine across the hall open behind me. 

My whole body froze like a bunny caught in a wolf’s gaze.

Fuck.

“Hey hey hey, my sweet little Y/N!” A bright, jovial baritone rang out behind me, and soon I felt the looming presence of the man I feared most coming into contact with at this very moment right at my back. The immense heat radiating off of him in waves with his sweet, clean scent with mint, along with a headier male musk underneath. “You’re home early! Sorry to be a pest but did you bring any pastries home with you? I have such an awful craving right now and-” my kind, handsome neighbor regarded me silently, and what I didn’t see were his sweet golden eyes darkening to a dangerous lustful shade as he leant forward and took a gentle sniff in. A ragged breath leaving his chest as he inched forward just enough for me to feel his clothing ghosting against my back. “Y/N? Are you okay? You smell.... you s-smell so good. Different,” he slurred behind me, leaning down to rub his cheek against the top of my head and nose my hair as he took in deeper breaths. I was completely frozen, in fear or need... I couldn’t decide.

Maybe both.

When my neighbor let out a deep, rumbling groan from inside his chest I leant more towards need in my current aching state as I instinctively pressed my body back against his. “Y-Y/N you shouldn’t be out right n-now in your state s’not safe y’know...” his voice trailed off, a pained mixture of a whimper and a growl leaving his chest as I reached forward and punched in my key code to my apartment.

“Ko,” I heard the Alpha behind me purr as his name slipped from my mouth, my voice and body trembling. “I had a bit of a setback as you can tell, so no pastries today,” the whimper that left him made my cheeks warm because it wasn’t hormonal, it was just Bokuto being a pouty baby who wanted a soft bread or sweet cake.

“Mm s’okay Y/N...” Bokuto’s voice trailed off as he placed his large hands on my hips, palms swallowing my sides and pressing tightly into the plush flesh, fingers gripping down with a bruising force. He was leaning forward and placing soft kisses along my shoulder and up my neck until he licked a small strip up along where my scent glands were and I couldn’t stop the full-body shudder than shook me. “D-do you want me to stop?” His voice was a whisper, still heavy with need but more Bokuto than Alpha was talking to me. I shook my head, stepping into my apartment and allowing the Alpha to come in with me, slipping out of our shoes in a tangled mess of legs, and laughing as Bokuto hastily locked the door behind him.

“I know we’re both kind of teetering on the edge of control right now,” Bokuto continued gently, hands still gripping my sides tightly as he allowed me to set my things down on the bench in my entryway. A low growl leaving him when I almost slipped out of his hold. “But I need to know it’s not just your omega pushing you into this Y/N. I’ve admired you since I first met you, wanted you,” Bokuto was peppering my neck and the side of my face with butterfly kisses, “but if you tell me to stop, to leave... I will. Nothing will change between us if you put up a boundary for yourself right now but everything will change for the worse if you force yourself into something you don’t want...” I couldn’t believe the articulated thoughts of pure, sweet kindness coming out of Bokuto’s mouth but I was so happy to hear them. I’ve had such a huge crush on my long-time Alpah neighbor since he came knocking on my door one late evening when I was testing recipes, a mess of apologies and need as he caught a whiff of the new cakes I was trying to perfect and the poor thing had just returned home from an away game with his volleyball team, starving and exhausted. He spent the night giving me feedback on my testers and I let him sugar-crash on my couch, waking him up with a healthier breakfast more suitable for an athlete in the morning. 

We’ve been close since that day.

Well, close but not as close as right now... despite the aching deep in me that always welled up inside whenever we spent time together. My omega whimpering at how perfect of an Alpha Bokuto would be.

“Y/N?” Bokuto was asking once again, I could feel his hands shaking as his control over his instincts began to slip. 

I simply nodded.

“Y-yes Ko,” I swallowed hard when his hands gripped tighter on my hips, crushing me further against him as his arms snaked up my body to wrap me in a tight hold from behind. “I want this - I’ve wanted this, w-wanted you...” I couldn’t form full thoughts, not like he deserved to hear but we were both in a compromising state of mind right now. “P-please Alpah, need you so badly,” that was all it took to have me turned around so fast in his arms, his lips crashing against mine in a mess of teeth and saliva as pure need took over us both. One of his hands was fisted in the hair at the back of my head, the other cupping the side of my throat, his thumb stroking along my jaw as he deepened the kiss like he was trying to crawl inside my body through my mouth. 

He was pushing me back toward my couch, his hands now fumbling behind me to pull the zipper of my dress and have the fabric pooling to the ground. He growled into my mouth as he hooked two fingers in the hem of my lace panties to pull them down and off while his other hand guided me down softly onto the couch. He had me draped over the arm of the sectional as he layed down between my legs, I was able to peek open my heavy eyes in time to see the primal look on his face before he licked his lips and leant down to lick a long strip up my soaked pussy, the sensation sending electric shocks through my whole body as I arched off the couch with a yelp.

Bokuto let out a deep, rumbling growl with a whisper of “so sweet,” before diving back in and devouring my sopping pussy like a man starved. His mouthed latched around my swollen clit with a pressure that had me seeing stars as he suddenly plunged two thick fingers into me, curling upward against my sticky walls, quickly bringing me to the edge. He didn’t relent his assault on me, mouth staying locked on and fingers curling cruelly as my body shook and arched up off the couch with a shrill scream, my whole body convulsing with wave after wave of electric pleasure shocks. Bokuto removed his fingers slowly and licked them clean, blowing a cool stream of air against my sensitive clit, causing me to whimper in his hold as he delved his tongue into me to lap up more of my slick. I was a whimpering mess above him, wriggling to be free of the stimulation to the newly over-sensitive area but he kept his pink muscle deep in my pussy as his nose occasionally brushed up against my clit causing my hips to buck further against his face. The groans he was letting out were downright sinful and soon had me back on the precipice of another impending orgasm. Bokuto reached one hand up to thumb circles on my clit as he kept himself deep in my pussy, soon I was bucking up against his face as another heavy wave crashed down on me. I was panting and swearing and pleading to be released because the pleasure was stating to morph with a tinge of pain as he kept up the relentless assault.

“K-Ko please no more,” I was whining above him, my chest heaving with broken breaths. Bokuto’s mouth was shiny with my slick as he crawled up my body and crashed his lips down on mine. I could taste myself on his tongue, in combination with feeling his still-clothed cock straining against his joggers, had me mewling with need and bucking up to meet his bulge.

“You say no more but your body is begging for me,” Bokuto muses. “Do you want me to stop?” His golden eyes were looking down at me, dark and swirling with lust as a beautiful half-smile graced his face. I shook my head and he just chuckled. “Use your words baby, ask for what you want,” he cooed, leaning down to pepper kisses and gentle nips along the side of my neck, stopping to suck on a particular spot once my let out a gasp and wriggled beneath his large body caging me in.

“Mmphf, p-please Ko, Alpha, need you,” my cheeks were burning but I didn’t care, my whole body was on fire for the man on top of me, crying out to him for any crumb he’d give me, “need your cock-mm-need to feel so full with you please Alpha, please,” Bokuto crashed his lips back down against mine with an urgent need while he ground his hardened cock against my slick-covered core, the friction of the fabric bringing another whine from my throat.

“How can I say no to such a pretty omega begging to be knotted, hm?” Bokuto was nuzzling down into the crook oh my neck, “pretty omega, perfect omega, my omega.” I didn’t realize when he had shimmied out of his joggers but soon I felt the large tip of his cock pressing into my hole, even with two orgasms and the slight stretch from his fingers earlier it still burned so wonderfully to be full of Bokuto’s cock, every inch of his cock catching on my walls and dragging new sensations forward as I clawed at his back, wrapping my arms and legs around him in an attempt to be closer to him, to pull more of him inside of me. “Such a needy slut for her Alphas cock, hmm?” I nodded my head so vigorously, rolling my hips to coax the man above me into moving. “Poor thing, I’ll give you everything you need...” with a quick snap of his muscled hips, his thick cock was driven deep, the head pummeling against my cervix with blinding pressure as he slammed his hips over and over into me, heavy balls slapping against my slick-coated ass sending shivers up my spine. “Fuck, ‘mega, you’re so tight-fuck- so fucking perfect, so perfect for me.” Bokuto was all bared teeth and snarls above me, leaning down to kiss and bite over his earlier marks along my neck. I craned my neck, exposing more of myself to his assault as he kept up the brutal pace inside of me. It didn’t take long before I was crying out with the sudden hit of an orgasm I didn’t even feel the buildup to, the walls of my pussy were sucking a Bokuto in deeper with each of his thrusts, and soon I could feel the way his hips stuttered, sloppy and less practiced. I didn’t realize his teeth were on me, biting deep into the flesh of my neck where my scent glands were, blood spilling out of the wound and into his mouth and down my neck and chest as Bokuto marked me as his, licking one long, final strip up my neck across the wound, sealing it.

There was a final quick snap of his hips, until Bokuto’s large knot stretched me with a burn that had me whimpering, gasping when it popped through the small opening of my pussy, slick helping to coax it inside as my walls clamped down on him and his knot further in another orgasms as he emptied ropes of hot, white cum deep inside of me. The continued short, sharp thrusts Bokuto made as he continued to empty himself inside of me brought on one more orgasm, my whole body siezing and shaking, walls clamping down around the fleshy member knotted inside of me, my chest was heaving with deep breaths as my eyes edged with black and every small twitch Bokuto made inside of me had me crying out - with pleasure or pain or both - I couldn’t tell. He leant down to scoop me up, our bodies still connected as he sat down on the catch and allowed me to stradle his lap, nestling me tightly against his chest as he kissed my hair and whispered such sweet things to me over and over, petting my hair, my face, peppering kisses along my cheek, jaw, down my throat and to my shoulder, gliding over the mark he made earlier with a gentle ghost of a kiss. My whole body felt like a live-wire ready to make contact with the wrong type of metal at any given moment, but Bokuto kept rubbing small patterns over my exposed skin, kneading his fingers deep into muscles I didn’t realize were sore, kissing un-kissed inches of skin over and over until he felt me relax in his arms, felt my body droop with exhaustion as I rested my head on his shoulder, snuggling into the crook of his neck as I bit back into him, giving him a small omega mark. Bokuto shuddered beneath me, gripping me tighter as I licked up the blood and kissed over the already-healing mark, nuzzling back into him.

“Y/N~” Bokuto said in a whisper sing-song voice, shaking me gently, “I think we can separate now baby,” he said, trying to lift me off of him gently.

“Mm, no Ko,” I grumbled, a gentle growl leaving my throat, “wanna stay like this  a little longer.” Bokuto just nodded, rubbing my back and resting his head on my shoulder.

“Yeah, a little longer baby,” he mused, “but then can you bake me something?”

You just shook your head, your body shaking with held-in laughter as you agreed to bake him as many sweets as he wanted just as soon as you could walk. Bokuto offered to do all the heavy lifting if you just told him what to do - and you relished in the idea of sharing the kitchen with Bokuto - with your Alpha.

What a sweet start to something beautiful. 

[skzfairies]

jessi showterview with ateez

note: words in bold are in english!

taglist: @ateezjuliet @chaerincore @nemonadex@shinyddeonghwa @atzaria

no yuri was so excited for sbowterview !

she literally finds jessi so funny so she was literally bouncing in her seat the whole way there 😭😭😭😭

her pose was her standing with one hand on her hip and the other resting on her leg because SHES A MODEL OFC <333

when jessi kept pushing the button for them to greet them she got so done after the third time 😭😭

she got so dizzy after bowing she almost fell but thankfully wooyoung literally had a death grip on her arm 😳

note: yuri gets dizzy really really fast and she falls literally every time she gets dizzy so wooyoung was just holding onto her out of expirence 😭😭

jessi picked her to go first !

jessi: ohhh, i’m excited to see what yuri does!

girl was literally blushing so hard because THE jessi touched her arm

SHE WAS SHAKING IN HER BOOTS

but she did a quick sexy introduction and then smiled like nothing happened afterwards

yuri: hello, i’m ateez’s spicy member, yuri!

jessi: oh my god girl, you’re HOT

HER SOUL LITERALLY LEFT HER BODY

but she quickly recovered 🥰

yuri: girl what are you saying, you’re the hottest one here!

THE BOYS GOT MAD AT HER FOR THAY ONE PLEASE

wooyoung: dID YOU JUST CALL US UGLY?

san: YOU ARE A MEMBER OF ATEEZ???

seonghwa: the disrespect 💔

WHEN MINGI SAID THEY SHOULD TOUCH HER BUTTON SHE LITERALLY GOT SO SHOCKED

SHE WAS LIKE “did i hear him correctly?”

SHE RAN OVER TO HIM AND PRETENDED TO THROW PUNCHED SJSJXKDKD

the best friend title was temporarily suspended from song mingi 💔💔

when jessi said she was a big fan of them she was like 🥺🥺🥺

WHEN JESSI THOUGHT SAN WAS THE OLDEST SHE LITERALLG BURSTED OUT IN LAUGHTER

PLEASE 😭😭 san’s fave was priceless

yuri: san oppa, take care of us well!

you know yuri took advantage of jessi calling hongjoong the second youngest 🥰

yuri+mingi: hongjoong-ah~

hongjoong: do you want to die?

yuri: as long as we die together 🥰

get you besties who will die w you <3

she was a little too excited for the yaja game ☺️

yuri: hyunju- ah, will you let your unnie treat you to some icecream 🥰

jessi: .... yes....unnie

please jessi was literally struggling 😭😭

she spoke so fast during the ateez introduction omg

yuri: hello i’m ateez’s refreshing and beautiful member yuri who is currently hosting music core and was a dear member of i.o.i!

we love a queen that compliments herself 🥰

when they danced to say my name the caption added that yuri co-cheorgraphed say my name and hala hala!

SHE WAS SO STUNNED WHEN YEOSANGS INTERVIEW HAPPENED

she literally did not know how to respond to that she was literally just like “😟” the whole time 😭😭

JESSI PRAISED HER SO MUCH

jessi: oh wow, you are very pretty! very nice, beautiful skin, oh, beautiful body too! you have nice legs!

yuri: thank you! 🥰

jessi: she’s too cute!! can i have your number?

yuri: yes of course girl, you can have my number!

YURI MADE JESSI FANGIRL OVER HER YES SHE DID

JESSI LITERALLY YELLED WHEN SHE DID THAT AND YURI WAS JUST LIKE :DDD

her secert talent was that she could do a back hand spring 💅

she demonstrated and had the whole studio clapping AS SHE SHOULD ‼️‼️

when she was done she gave a dramatic bow and seonghwa threw her shoes 😭

NOT IN A MEAN WAY BECAUSE I WAS EXCITED like how loona did when they were recreating tik toks 😭

she ran in tiny to get them back please 😭

yuri: mY SHOES! SEONGHWA OPPA YOU MENACE TO SOCIETY 😡

she was the only one that laughed with mingi 💔

besties supporting besties 💅

she almost passed away when jessi cursed

she was like I LOVE WOMEN SM <3

she didn’t participate in any of the stunts but the one where they were like ? all in it minus yeosang i just know someone was on yunhos shoulders

but yuri sat on yunho’s shoulders and she was like “if you drop me i’m going to haunt you after i die 🥰🥰”

AND SHE WAS NEAR THE MIDDLE FOR THE ONE THEY ALL FID TOGETHER SO SHE DIDNT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING BECAUSE SHES ATEEZ’S PRINCESS <3

even tho she could EASY be near the bottom

when she saw yunho make his excited oook she was like “..their not going to understand that but whatever you say.”

WHEN SHE SAW EVERYONE ACTING SEXY AHE WAS IKE YIU ARE ALL SO DUMB HOW DID YOU GET EXCITED TO SEXY ???

yuri: iT WAS LITERALLY EXCITED NOT WHATEVER YOU ALL ARE DOING....THATS A PG-13 EXCITMENT THERE

yunho: technically it was thrilled...so...

yuri: THEY MEAN THE SAME THING ???

anyways YURI HAD SO MUCH FUN :DDDD

[symptoms-syndrome]

SW TW

I miss being an escort 😭😭😭 but I know I wouldn't be able to do it as easily now for a bunchhh of reasons. But like...I enjoyed it...I made monies...sobs.

In some ways drag feels like. Similar? In that I'm claiming my sexuality or whatever. Maybe that's why this is on my mind.

Regardless.......I want rich clients who buy me things and tell me I'm pretty 🥲

I mean it's not like I even had a solid exit plan, like it's mostly coincidence and stuff that I ended up where I am now, but also I know that like. That whole job was gonna expire eventually, esp if I wanted to transition. Plus it's sooo competitive now, IDK s/x work is more in vogue or smth. So I'd need to majorly step my game up if I wanted to go back in, but I don't wanna...plus I'd have to pretend to be a cute lil girly girl again instead of the fun, true to myself way I express myself now. So I guess drag will be my lil scratch for that itch. My drag mom knows I have a history of sex work and she says it probably helps me be better w drag, I would agree w that. A lot of drag artists are also sex workers, esp queens.

[vanityloves]

Jude my Dude, what is killing me about the whole "Tumblr Tries To Classify Medic As A Twink" is that the caption of the picture on the wiki is "Medic Not Being A Twink". Like, duh. In no world could medic be a twink. Not only does he have to stay strong to carry the team (at least in his mind but a good medic is clutch in game) but also like. This man has needed to haul multiple "cadavers" around at once. We might not have seen it, but you know in your heart its canon.

One of the reasons I like Medic so much is BECAUSE hes built like a hearty meatloaf - cant knock this boy over with a pale of water look at that dude:

like WOO YEAH BABY im gonna climb that bitch!

the editor was NOT havin it with the community calling medic a twink and neither will i - that mf has bigger boobs than me i swear to fucking god AND he has a bit of a paunch. the only thing skinny ab this mf is his ankles i swear i could cross him but then again, if you look at spy's shoestring potato legs, medic looks like fucking loaded baked potato owaowa

and even IF he were twinkish- hes a fucking otter. that man has body hair and you will respect that.

-

ppl will see a character w/ glasses or a 'doctor' and say haha fucking nerd! *stuffs into locker* yes, this man lives and breathes science, thats his first love and will do the absolute MOST bc he's that dedicated and extra ab himself/interests. And he does have some authority amongst the team or has some respect (think of expiration date where no one questioned his calculations or the line he had outside the medbay in meet the medic).

We DO see him carrying around that heavy ass medigun/pack and not to mention he's the 2nd fastest class (just after scout) - maybe we dont see much more than that but i think that says enough. i think its worth mentioning how he can pick up soldier (the absolute beefcake, gorilla built man) with ease and shake him around and then hold him up (maybe w/ some help w/ soldier on his toppu toes who knows). who the fuck does he think he is. it wasnt one of those 'oooh im so mad grrr oooh im gonna pull you in by the collar and get in your face' thing, it was a, whatever this is:

[bewitching-elizabeth-olsen]

Press: Elizabeth Olsen, Much Like Wanda Maximoff, Comforts Herself With Classic TV

W MAGAZINE: For W’s second annual TV Portfolio, we asked 26 of the most sought-after names in television to pay homage to their favorite small-screen characters by stepping into their shoes.

WandaVision was the first television show produced by Marvel Studios, and any gamble Disney+ took to make the series happen immediately paid off. At one point during its nine-episode run, WandaVision was the most popular streamed show in the world (beaten only recently by another Marvel series, Loki). The suburbia-set series received critical acclaim, snagging 23 Emmy nominations—one of those for Elizabeth Olsen, who was nominated for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Limited or Anthology Series or Movie for her performance as the titular Wanda—and convinced even the biggest Marvel skeptics to buy into its delicious plot.

It might come as a surprise, then, that Olsen doesn’t really watch that much contemporary television herself. But who could blame the actress, when most of her time is spent filming scenes for the Marvel Cinematic Universe as Wanda Maximoff (also known as the Scarlet Witch), a wielder of chaos magic who materializes in the small town of Westview—first as a 1950s-era housewife married to a humanlike robot named Vision (played by Paul Bettany), then as a ’60s housewife, then a ’70s housewife, and so on. When the actress does watch television, though, she prefers to get into some of those older shows, like Murder, She Wrote, which she chose to re-create above, and, of course, episodes of ’90s sitcoms like Full House, of which there was no dearth in the actress’s childhood.

My contract with Marvel was done. Kevin Feige, who runs Marvel, had me come into his office, and he pitched me WandaVision. I loved the concept of it, but I was terrified of a new streaming service—that is now Disney+.

Did you know the entire concept going in, or was it revealed to you over time?

He told me that he wanted to create a story about Wanda Maximoff manipulating reality to mimic the sitcoms that she grew up with in order to comfort herself. He wanted it to be kind of trippy, for it to feel like a sitcom, but twisted, kind of Twilight Zone-y. That reminded me of Twilight Zone: The Movie, where there’s a boy who is obsessed with television, has a horrible family, and he conjures up a bunny that kills his whole family. It’s really wacky. I just thought, It would be incredible if we do anything that’s a piece of that.

Were you personally a fan of I Love Lucy and other old sitcoms?

Yeah, I watched Nick at Nite all the time. I loved I Love Lucy, Laverne & Shirley. I didn’t like The Brady Bunch, but I loved the Brady Bunch sequel movies. That made me excited to get to reference The Brady Bunch [in WandaVision].

Did you shoot the episodes in order, or did you go back and forth between the 1950s and ’60s?

We tried to film everything in order. The exteriors, though, we hopped around. Our fences, the color of the houses, the flowers all look different from decade to decade. Luckily, it was pretty contained, but it really was sad to wrap the sitcom. We wrapped it when Paul and I and Kathryn [Hahn] and Teyonah [Parris] were filming the ’70s opening montage to the Brady Bunch theme, and that was how he wrapped it—in six bizarre outfits, with a pregnant belly on a tandem bike.

Did you keep anything from the set?

I’m not a keeper, because I feel like I’m not allowed to [keep things]. I feel like everything goes into some box that they hide from everyone, then maybe eventually they’ll retire and reuse shit. I have no idea.

I thought you might keep Wanda’s apron!

That would have been a really impractical apron. It was made out of gauze. Anything would bleed right through it.

Do you have an understanding of women in each decade now? Did you have to wear the undergarments and the whole nine yards?

Yeah. I loved the undergarments. It’s all helpful for the time, for the character, for how women move, how they talk. The shoes were the worst. I did wear vintage period shoes. And that’s awful. My feet don’t even like heels, let alone heels that have quite literally no support.

Is it difficult to have kissing scenes with all the purple paint on Paul Bettany when he’s dressed as Vision?

It’s really hard. It comes off on me, even though they try as much as they can to powder him. They have to powder his hands all the time, because if he wants to touch my face… They have to be on top of us for those scenes. It’s really not practical.

So which character did you decide to play for our portfolio?

I decided to be Angela Lansbury [as Jessica Fletcher] in Murder, She Wrote. I asked my friend Clayton Hawkins, who’s a hairstylist and great with wigs, if he could get a cheap wig and wrap my hair. And that’s what we did. I was watching Murder, She Wrote in London a lot.

During lockdown?

I was filming there, and in and out of lockdowns, but filming through lockdowns as well. And that was one of the things that would be on the television. I think I never really sat down and watched Murder, She Wrote until then. It’s fabulous. Great guest stars, great whodunits. My favorite moment is when they solve it and play it out for you in the solving of the mystery and going backwards. It’s just delicious, and it feels good to watch. There’s a great horse-racing episode that I loved, because I love the racetrack.

Did you have a TV show you loved growing up?

I never did Dawson’s Creek, I never did any of those shows. What did I watch, though? I loved Family Matters, Step by Step, The Torkelsons. And I loved Full House. We had all the VHSs, and it was very easy to watch at my house.

Did you have a crush on John Stamos?

Yes.

Who was your cinematic crush when you were growing up?

Frank Sinatra. I didn’t know they were old movies that I was watching. So when you say “TV shows,” what I consumed as a child was all old musicals, like Oklahoma!, Guys and Dolls, Carousel, West Side Story. I loved classic musicals, and I was in love with Frank Sinatra. I would do scenes with him in my bathroom, which then turned into scenes with George Clooney as I got older and I realized Frank Sinatra was an old man. I was like, Well, maybe if I get older, I can at least work with George Clooney, as his daughter’s friend or something, and then we have a thing.

What was your first red carpet look? Was it for Martha Marcy May Marlene?

Yeah, Cannes was my first red carpet look. I was in the Row. I was in a black Row skirt and a lace top, and I didn’t have an undergarment on. I didn’t know that flash photography at night was going to be my enemy, and my publicist worked really hard to try and remove those pictures from the Internet. [Laughs]

Do you have a secret skill?

You know what I’m really good at? Removing stains. I believe I can remove a stain from anything.

How did you learn to remove stains?

Probably started with my mom, who’s a soaker. That’s kind of the first rule: patience. And then, because I cook so much, I think I just had to learn. I’m pretty “woman of the house” handy.

I thought you were going to say that your secret skill was that you can sell real estate. Because when I first met you, you had a real estate license.

I did. It’s definitely expired. I got my real estate license because I didn’t want to work in a restaurant in New York as a summer job. So I thought, I’ll work in a real estate office. I was dealing with my sister’s friend who was a realtor, and I dealt with his rental clients. And I would mispronounce streets in New York all the time, because I had just moved there.

Press: Elizabeth Olsen, Much Like Wanda Maximoff, Comforts Herself With Classic TV was originally published on Elizabeth Olsen Source • Your source for everything Elizabeth Olsen

[helenazbmrskai]

Not Alone

Title Not Alone

Pairing Yoongi x OC

Summary University is kicking your ass so you always make sure to dedicate a day for yourself and take time to pamper your body and soul. However, you’re cautious around Yoongi your roommate and double-check the d-day to prevent accidents. You're not a fan of revealing any skin because of your insecurities but it’s just happening to be the day when you are - not so alone.

Genre university au, roommate au, romance and fluff, smut

Warning(s) smut (body worshipping, oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, messy sex, first time, virgin reader, dirty talk, vanilla sex, yoongi has a virgin kink but not explicitly mentioned) implication of insecure reader, shy and curvy reader

Word count: 9k

Masterlist

This universe is related to my other fic I wrote recently ’one time boy space friend’ you can read that one here.

Washing the excess shaving cream off of my hand I grab my phone I previously placed on the toilet’s folded lid lightly humming the outline of the song currently playing. The new playlist Yoongi recommended is full of bangers as always I have no doubt his fate was eventually to end up as a music major. I take a glance at my reflection when I was able to secure the new position for my phone on the laundry basket with the top slightly open reminding me that I need to do laundry if I want to have clothes to wear.

I take a glance at my reflection removing the fog that made the lines of my face blurry with a towel hanging next to the sink on a hook realising later that I used Yoongi’s looking back at the sheepish smile that greets me in the mirror I placed the fabric back hoping that Yoongi won’t mind.

An unknown rap song’s first beats suddenly interrupted by an incoming call that the familiar piano version of my favourite song signalled. I smile seeing the callers ID, placing the toner back to its dust-filled spot next to Yoongi’s shaving cream I make sure to use the right towel this time to dry my hands with before swiping right on the call.

”Hey, What’s the matter?” I answer it with a huge grin plastered on my face making my cheeks ride up into a chipmunk-like smile.

Our class was cancelled at the last minute so I wasn’t expecting a call from her she told me while we were waiting for the instructor to arrive that she has plans with his boyfriend Jimin. Only having calculus that day after an exchanged heated curses for our lazy professor for not e-mailing about the reschedule I happily took a sweet nap and made an easy breakfast I normally don’t have time to consume or even make in the morning I was able to get my relaxing time to start earlier so it meant more time for me since Yoongi supposedly took the afternoon shift.

This piece of information I remembered while chewing on my sandwich as I thanked the gods that I overheard his conversation about the shift change last night when I went to get my late-night snack but seeing the date expired on the comfort food I had to engage in a yoghurt instead.

”Y/N. Are you home?” She asked matching my good mood in the background I heard clinking noises of a pan she must be cooking. I insert my head through the large black t-shirt’s hole as I started to freeze standing here only in my undergarments the effect of the hot shower faded leaving me in the significantly colder bathroom.

”Of course. I started my pamper routine. I cannot tell you how good it feels to be hairless. If only my hair would grow this fast.” She chuckles hearing my banter the faint sounds of crepitation usually the hot oil makes overpowering her giggle for a few seconds. I remember the sandwich I ate this morning around ten-ish that did not prove to be enough. I get sidetracked with what should I make for lunch.

”Oh, so Yoongi is working?” Knowing about my only one rule regarding this d-day I like to call it is that no man should be around when I’m wearing this revealing clothing. He only saw me wearing jeans and yoga pants before these jelly-like legs cannot make a debut in front of eyes outside of mine.

”Yep.” I confirm. I take a look at the time I still have lots of time to relax before I should start that assignment I postponed.

I have everything planned out since Yoongi usually comes home from work in a grumpy state he likes to shower first and then he retreats into his room to do his assignments and sometimes he writes a song or the song even could be the assignment itself I honestly don’t know how’s everyday life as a music major. Yoongi is not exactly the talkative type.

My silent activity is helping his concentration and the best thing is that I have the apartment by myself to do what I please and leave the comfort of my room wearing what I please without worrying.

The best would be if I could rent out my own apartment but I know I wouldn’t be able to pay it by myself and the fact that Yoongi and I share the expenses of the bill makes things so much more easier.

”Why did you call though? I’m sure it’s not because you already miss me.” Tired of holding the phone up I place it back where it was before leaving the call on speakers so I can rub the cocoa scented lotion into the skin on my legs.

”Right. I almost forgot. Jin taught you that Mexican dish that I don’t know how to pronounce its name, right?” Her voice fades a little mid-sentence probably changed ears hearing the cooking noises seeping through the background she seemed very busy.

”What about it?” I question closing the lid of the lotion after I rub the remaining cream on my hand onto my neck so nothing goes to waste.

”I need the recipe.” She demands. I laugh how desperate she sounds through the phone. I make my way out of the bathroom I need my notebook since I didn’t memorise the dish I only made it once and as it was previously stated with the help of Jin.

”Hold on I don’t remember where I left the notes.” I arrive at the kitchen area placing the phone on the counter I begin rummaging through the drawers bending down to peek at the content of each. Spoons and forks. The second one where Yoongi placed the aprons and towels my notebook must be in the last one. ”So, what are the plans for today?” I ask while still searching for the black shiny cover of my notebook.

”Well, I wanted to cook something Italian since Jimin told me once he wanted to try it out but a crucial ingredient is missing so I thought about making that one you told me about a few weeks ago at Jin’s birthday party. After I’m finally done with this shit I’m going to sneak into his room to give him the blowjob of his life while he’s playing some shit games boys do and tell him lunch is ready.” The huge breath she took before starting the word vomiting makes me praise her lung capacity.

Finally. The book was under the aprons what a hassle. I straighten up turning the pages when I hear the front door opening and shut soon after. I turn to see the face of the intruder as I’m still standing in the middle of the kitchen with my hair evidently wet from the shower I took earlier only in my panties and a huge ass shirt to cover myself with.

Yoongi drops his coffee-stained shirt by the foot of the couch the angle is letting me see the living room area without a problem but he can’t clearly see the kitchen from there but my relief is not long-lasting as my friend decides to choose that moment to speak drawing Yoongi’s attention to where I’m standing.

”Y/N are you still there? Shit. I burnt my finger.” Grabbing the phone off the counter I switch off the speaker option and push the device against my ear.

”Yeah, um, I’ll send you the recipe via message. Good luck. Bye.” I aggressively push the red phone button at the bottom left side of the screen until the call ends. Hearing my voice Yoongi walks through the door separating the living room and the kitchen to halt his steps when he takes the image in.

It’s not one of those best times to ponder over how good looking he’s after finishing work and how he always smells like freshly brewed coffee which is not a surprise knowing the fact that he works at a coffee shop near our rented place.

He doesn’t wear the shirt uniform it must be the one he got rid of because of the stains today he wears a simple white t-shirt with washed-out blue jeans. Focusing on his face again I see that his eyes no longer studying my face instead his gaze dipped lower and I swear he's not so subtle about ogling at my exposed legs. My legs!

”You’re … early.” I talk first considering my options. A, I can still make a run for it but the damage is already done. He saw me. Or B, I can try to make small talk pretending that nothing is embarrassing at all just to later enter my room and dig a hole with all of my self-pity and scream into my pillow.

”Um, there was a shift change but I finished 2 hours early in return.” He explains this time his gaze was on my face the entire time no more strayed glimpses. Fuck. I should have paid attention to the whole conversation. ”Don’t you .. have class normally this time around?” He trails off a faint trace of blush appears on his porcelain skin. I use the notebook to hide my panty line that peeks out of the shirt.

”Class cancelled.” I’m horrified how my voice sounds so high pitched the embarrassment paints my cheeks bright red. ”Um, I have something to do in my room so I’ll be there.” I use the lame excuse to escape from Yoongi when I close the door behind me I close my eyes as well because of the extreme humiliation I had to go through.

My phone buzzes in hand I suddenly remember the recipe I promised. I write a quick message to her attaching the picture of the ingredients and notes to help her with the preparations. Now since I’m done with the responsibilities I can swim in my tears for the time being.

I can’t believe after months of caution fate decided to take away from me the deserved me time days. Yoongi is probably weirded out by me too I don’t know how to look him in the eye from now on and it’s a serious problem. For lords heaven, we live together! There’s no way I can avoid him without being obvious about it.

I mean maybe I’m just overreacting. It’s Yoongi we are talking about. He most of the time doesn’t give a flying fuck about anything he certainly won’t mention it and for obvious reasons I won’t either so I can just leave things like that. Just acting as usual like he didn’t saw my legs and my black underwear not to mention he is the very first one to see it I mean outside of my family of course. He’s a boy. No. A man. And he saw me underdressed like that.

It’s okay Y/N, let’s see the bright side at least he saw me when I was shaved. Well, that doesn’t help. Not at all.

”Shit. I’m hungry.”

I waited an hour and forty minutes to be exact despite the rumble of my stomach I sat down to start the book one of my friends lent me to read and I’m over a quarter of the pages when I decided enough is enough.

I waited long enough so he must be cooped up in his room slash studio for the rest of the day. But to be extra cautious I peeked out before fully leaving the safety of my room. I stop once I step into the corridor listening for any noises that might indicate Yoongi has indeed occupied his nest the soft sounds of the synthesizer helps me to relax I leisurely make my way then in the direction of the kitchen.

As I flip the switch the room is enveloped in light. My favourite mug is sitting on top of the counter even though I don’t remember leaving it there. I walk to take a closer look the mug is filled with coffee it’s in a light brown colour so it must a latte. It smells like latte indeed.

My favourite drink. There’s a note glued to the bottom of the mug it’s a messy handwriting and I don’t have to guess to know to whom this belongs to. How did he know my favourite coffee order?

”Sorry for startling you earlier. - myg”

The simple worded note even had his initials at the end. Realising that I never tried out his coffee made me curious about the taste. He works as a barista so It cannot be bad. I’m always late for class so I never had the chance before going into the shop when he’s on duty and order a drink from him.

Most of the time I’m saving on it and just use the shared coffee machine. Don’t blame me I’m just a broke university student.

But if I drink this I won’t be able to sleep it’s pretty late. Fuck it. I’m going to drink it. Not that the unholy time for coffee consumption deterred me before and picked up on some of Yoongi’s personal characteristics I think I can confidently say he doesn’t care either.

I bite into my lip while carefully straightening the lines out on the sticky note. After I was convinced the note won’t come off of his door I leave to go to bed.

”Thanks for the coffee. I liked it. – Y/N.”

***

”Can you guys stop shovelling food into your mouths for a millisecond. I’m serious!” Hitting the table for further emphasis.

Rori and F/N digging through a pile of food before our morning class is something I got used to first as I befriended them and it doesn’t bother me any other time but I wanted some serious advice for once and they don’t even stop digging to say well that’s was awkward. Or shit that sucks.

Not that I don’t know that without them telling me. I appreciated the note and the subtle apology he didn’t phrase it like hey dummy I’m sorry for seeing your sausage legs my bad. Also, it would be unlikely, too wordy for him he’s tight-lipped even in messages. I don’t remember he ever told me like a two full sentence in one go.

”Serious for what Y/N? He saw your underwear and legs. Tell us if you display your boobs or something. Now, I would be interested.” Rolling my eyes at the sarcastic remark I steal one of her favourite apple pie sticks for good measures.

”Hey! I was going to eat that.” She pouts but I take another big bite out of it. It’s too sweet for my liking but everything for the even sweeter revenge. If there’s one thing I learned about these two throughout the years of knowing them is that they take their food very seriously. ”Look. We love you, that’s why I’m going to tell you this. It’s not a big deal.” She pats my cheek before picking up her fork again.

”So what happened F/N. Did you gave Jimin the blowjob of his life?” I used a quote mark at the end of the sentence just how she phrased it yesterday. Rori is more interested in that, of course, there’s nothing more important than sex.

”Let me say the food was cold once we were finished.” She chuckled bashfully. Do I have the right set of friends? Maybe I should be pickier about who I call as a friend.

”So he’s big?” Rori asked with a smirk and I almost spitted out the diet coke onto the dining table. We are in a fucking coffee shop for god damn good. Thankfully not the one Yoongi works for but I think he has morning class so he won’t be working either way.

”Please don’t go into details.” I plea and Rori presents me with a devilish grin while picking the chicken breasts out of my salad.

”It’s fine Y/N. I was a virgin too before Jimin. Your time will come, not that it’s a choice.” F/N tries to console me.

”It’s a choice just not mine.” I murmur it under my nose stabbing my salad with the fork before chewing on it without the meat it’s quite sour.

”Yeah. It’s because you and F/N are both have big sticks up your asses.” Used to her blunt remarks I’m not even hurt or surprised for that matter. The busy cafe drowns out the voices of their inappropriate talk at least.

”It’s not our fault that you fuck every man with a pulse.” F/N retorts back with a giggle satisfied with the remark we exchange high fives.

”How do you know it’s a requirement?” Rori lifts one of her brows making us do gagging motions.

”Ugh, That’s disgusting.” I abandon the food on my plate that was a bit too much and we are in the middle of breakfast.

”A person cannot even joke here? I wasn’t serious. Duh.” I should really search for those new friends.

”That’s something I can believe.” The insult wasn’t even spoken out too loud but she heard me all the same and it earned a kick under the table from Rori with his high heels, I returned the glare she sent my way.

***

”Oh, hi.” I step aside to let Yoongi enter, he furrows his brows in concentration if I wasn’t running late I would ponder over the fact how he measures my body by centimetres. I fidget with my earrings but without a mirror, it’s a difficult task to carry out.

”I thought we’re going to meet with the guys at 8.” Realising the motive behind his stare I nod furiously.

”Yeah. But Rori accepted that guy’s offer to taste wines and she’s afraid she’s going to be abducted so me and F/N will accompany her.” I tell him and he doesn’t seem pleased I wasn’t either at first but I hope he won’t do anything with three girls there.

”Be careful. Anyone else knows about this?” He asks with evident worry lacing his voice he steps closer helping to finally get that chape snap into place.

”Jimin knows and I think Jungkook knows too.” Once he’s done he restores the distance between the two of us. ”Also you know F/N she’s apt to be violent.” Yoongi nods.

”Fuck. I’m late.” I swear as I look at the time. With hurried steps, I pick up my boots and size up my keys ready to leave.

”See you later.” Hearing his voice calling out to me I look back smiling a little managing to whisper back a ’see you later’ of my own. I think this was the longest conversation I held with him so far, what a shame I couldn’t stay to talk more.

The wine tasting went better than I expected. That guy is filthy rich he gave us a little tour around the house before letting us each pick out 5 wines of our liking. We learned that he’s a sports major he’s a swimmer and he told us stories about his practises with the swimming team and talked awfully long about his wins and trophies. To be honest he seemed like a bit eccentric and pompous for me but Rori liked him.

We were late because our taxi on its way to the bar got into a little traffic jam. I got a text from Yoongi at the same time F/N got one from Jimin they were curious about where we are and how we are. We wrote back a short text that we’re almost there.

”So? Whose’s the guy?” Jin asked once we are seated down. F/N took her place next to Jimin and Rori beside her leaving me with the only option of sitting down next to Yoongi at the other side of the table.

Once I’m comfortably seated I look around the table I catch in the corner of my eye Namjoon and Jungkook taking shots. Yoongi grabs his alcoholic beverage before him from the table our shoulders brush against each other due to the motion. I bite the inside of my cheeks don’t want to fidget in place.  

”He’s a sports major.” Rori told Jin she told him about our little tour but she conveniently left out the offer about a threesome that I politely declined.

”Oh Y/N you remember that guy who wanted to get your phone number?” Scrunching my nose as the scene flashed before my eyes, of course, I remember. That was one of my most awkward moments and believe me when I say there’s a lot of option to choose from on my list and it’s still the worst. As far as I know, that guy was a sports major too and he was very persistent.

”Yes, what about him?” I nod. I try to shoo the pictures out of head but a forming blush creeping up my neck quicker than I realise.

”Well he’s here. And he’s coming this way.” F/N tells without looking my way her eyes trained behind my form probably to report back his every move. I physically have to hold myself back from whimpering and its not the good kind.

”Shit.” I bite my lower lip don’t want to make things more obvious I don’t turn around to confirm it.

”Oh. I remember. You gave him Rori’s number, don’t you?” Jungkook, you traitor. He was with me when it happened I was flustered enough that he asked Jungkook is my boyfriend or not that I didn’t want to expand my suffering so I gave him my friend's number. She told me if someone I don’t want tries to get into my pants and bothers me I can use her number as a bait knowing her even though my pants were not on the line I still did that. Well, she did more than that after.

”Then what’s the problem?” Jin asks so invested in our conversation that I want to smack him on the neck.

”I was sexting with him and we fucked.” She shrugs. That was what I tried to say. I really don’t want to face that guy.

I stand up with so much vehemency that I almost knock down a glass from the table it’s Yoongi’s empty glass at the bottom of it there’s a thin line of whiskey left. Yoongi grabs my thighs to stabilise me. Looking over his shoulder I saw that said guy indeed walking into this direction.

”Uh, please dance with me?” I grab Yoongi’s hand surprising him for a moment or two but lets me pull him up.

”You have a habit of running away, huh?” I look back to get a grip at the situation. I led Yoongi into the dance floor even though I don’t even know how to dance. He sees the panic settling in my face so he starts guiding me with his hand flat against my lower back. There’s a lot of bodies to avoid so Yoongi is extremely close.

”I don’t like confrontation.” I subtly hide behind his broad shoulders I can see it on him how he tries to stop himself from laughing. I like the sound of his laugh.

”I’m aware.” He purrs into my ear pulling me closer by a hand wrapped around my waist the sweet scent of his cologne hits me like a tone of bricks. I’m painfully aware how his body touches mine my breast pushed against his flat ribcage I can feel him inhaling and exhaling the used oxygen.

”Y-your hand Yoongi.” His hand is dangerously low on my back I’m sure he feels the curve of my ass under his fingers. The bar is dimly lit so my blush remains subtle in a certain extent seeing me blush so many times I wouldn’t be surprised if he would recognise it before it fully blooms on my face.

”What about it?” He clearly wants me to say it but there’s no way I’m going to bluntly say that his hand touches my ass. Rather die.

”What are you doing? Are you drunk?” I defensively ask answering the question with my own questions. He openly finds my antics amusing because this time he laughs. That gummy smile makes my knees weak for him he strengthens his hold on my waist like he knows it.

”My car is here. I’m as sober as I can be.” The hand I placed on his chest when he suddenly pulled me closer itched. He’s touching me and he’s sober. Heaving a sigh he replaces them around his neck I can’t relish in the feeling as his hand on my ass beyond doubt gone since he places it back soon after even lower. The grin he shows me makes me want to give him my fist instead of my virginity.

”Then why are you touching me?” My confidence wavered significantly as he lowered his head his lips closer than ever but instead of kissing me, he blows air into my ear riling me up with the gesture.

”This makes you uncomfortable?” I wanted to say yes, but the full truth would be it’s undeniably uncomfortable and exciting it makes my blood boil under my skin and it scares me how much I want him to touch me tossing aside my insecurities just to feel him like this. At least he knows his boundaries. I don’t know what would I do if his hand suddenly moved.

”No. I’m just embarrassed.” I nervously twist a hair at the nape of his neck didn’t realise the act just when I did it.

”You ran away because you were embarrassed yesterday too?” I stop toying with his hair once the words register in my head. Is he talking about the kitchen incident? And here I thought that there’s nothing more that could make the situation more awkward.

”Y-yes.” The confidence I felt before left me I shy away from his eyes the way he sized me up that day still vivid in my head.

”Why?” A perfect arch of his eyebrows indicating that he wants his answer this time and I am about to give him.

”Because you were staring at me.” I tell him oh so matter of factly. He practically beams at the offered answer the glint in his eyes telling me that’s the answer he seeks in the first place and he has his own set of words in return.

”Wanna know what I thought about while staring at you?” His eyes pinning me to my spot I wouldn’t dare to move away even if I wanted to he seemed determined to get under my skin and maybe under my clothes too.

”No.” I challenge drunk by the boldness maybe the gin tonic I consumed earlier and the wines finally appearing be to be the liquid courage I needed. Reading between the lines Yoongi tells me despite the answer.

”I imagined how you would look like wearing my shirt. It would cover you below your knees since you are tiny. Tell me you’re wearing one of those black panties I saw before?” I don’t answer but I let him pat my knee I can feel his warm palm under the fabric of my jeans he continues with more words even bolder than the first.

”I imagined how you would look like under me on my bed wrapping those long legs around my waist.” Affected by his words I mirror his hungry expression. He’s normally not a man of so many words and hearing him talk this much makes me feel special that he’s talking to me because he feels the need to let me know what’s plaguing his mind. I entertain the idea that maybe he wasn’t sure how to convey the message since I’m so shy he didn’t have a lot of opportunity cornering me before the kitchen incident. Perhaps it was the undo he needed.

”Tell me Y/N. Do you find me attractive?” His fingers stroke the flesh of my jaw he’s getting confident as I don’t push him away.

”You are attractive.” I tell him honestly and he grins but not in a malice kind of way his grin more like a boyish grin that boys wear after hearing that their high school crush likes them back. The happy kind of grin.

”Have you thought about me too? Like I did.” The next question hits differently it’s not so innocent and I wasn’t in the illusion he is.

”Yes.” Holding onto the boldness I agree.

”Tell me.” He urges. He’s sober I remember. Avoiding his stare I let my shyness getting to the best of me he brushes a strand of hair behind my ears coaxing out the reply. It feels nice to be touched by him.

”It’s embarrassing.”

”I told you mine. You have to tell me your fantasies so I can make them come true.” He trails a finger following the line of my collarbone my outfit leaves literally everything to the imagination the only skin he can feel is on my arms.

”You’re unfair.” I whine the words out Yoongi stops his movements to see the emotions behind my eyes. He seems confused by my conflicted expression. His eyes were always expressive and I loved staring at them. Those rare moments shared, eating together at the weekends letting me hear one of his song he proudly introduces.

”How so?”

I take a deep breath cupping his cheeks. ”You look good with dyed hair but I prefer it black. You look the best when you come home from work all sweaty because the air conditioner still not gotten repaired in your workplace so you always take a shower before doing anything else.” There’s glint catching the light in his orbs watching me closely while I tell him the things I locked away in my memories. He caresses my wrist with a raised hand the other directly resting upon mine as it's his face still trapped between the heels of my palms.

”I like your voice.” I let the words flow out like a river caught up in a thunderstorm. ”I always wanted to know how it would sound like moaning my name. I like your hands too.”

”What about them?” A big smile stretches his face knowing too well he won. I don’t feel the frustration of losing I’d gladly accept this fate again and again if it will give me the same results at the end of this.

”Yoongi.” I whine.

”Did you imagined this? Or this?” His hands leaving their position fondling the flesh on my hip hiding me behind his body he walks a hand up my decolletage.

”Stop, we are in public.” I hiss.

”No one pays attention Y/N. But I’ll gladly take this to the bedroom.” The offer temps me but I remember the boys.

”We can’t. You are the only sober one and the guys need their ride home.” I reason and Yoongi groans in frustration. He forgot about them already. He looks at the booth the others are drinking and laughing.

”If I tell Namjoon to stop drinking he would be sober enough to drive them back.”

I shake my head it would be too dangerous and considering he competed with Jungkook about who can take more shots I bet he’s drunk like a donkey alongside with the younger boy. ”I’m drunk too.” I tell him when he tries to come up with more solution.

”Fine.” Yoongi hugs me close probably to hide his displeased face doesn’t want to sound so desperate maybe he’s embarrassed.

”Don’t be like that. I promise if in the morning when I sobered up you still want to do it I’ll let you.”

He perks up gently pushing me away to look into my eyes. ”Let me do what?”

”Let you take me.”

 ***

I feel something warm tickling my sides a sudden wave of cold air hits my stomach but the cold soon replaced with a warm and wet feel against my skin. My eyes narrowly open I try to fidget away wrapping my fingers around the comforter when I feel that wet and warm feeling on my thighs.

Hands and tongue. The fog in front of my eyes clears I don’t remember when did I fell asleep or how did I end up here. Where am I? I spot the synthesizer in the corner Yoongi’s synthesizer. Yoongi’s room.

”Yoongi, what .. ah” My voice raspy from sleep the way he rubbed his nose into my neck just to deliver a long kiss to it after halted my question before I was able to voice it out.

”Did I wake you up. My bad.” He smiled into my skin loving the way my heart beats erratically with his every touch, his hand above my breast feeling the movements of it.

”You don’t sound so sorry about it.”

”Do you have a headache?” He caresses the side of my face helping to curl the locks behind my ear that interfered with my vision. The thoughtful gesture made me smile up at his face mirroring his expression of tenderness.

”No I’m good. I didn’t drink that much.” My fingers itch to touch his face maybe it’s because of the dreamy state I’m currently in that I have the confidence in doing so. I brush my hands through his bangs his eyes closing the caress urges a smile he grabs my hands once I’m about to pull away to move it against his mouth giving a small kiss onto my palm before intertwining them with his much larger ones.

I could get used to this. The image of him looking so raw and so vulnerable his eyes puffy with sleep lazy motions of his fingertip exploring my body under the duvet. My shirt is rolled up just below my breasts the shirt’s neck hangs around my shoulder in a loose coverage it smells like Yoongi just like the covers. Looking down I realise it’s not my shirt. It’s his.

”Glad to hear that. I want you to repeat your promise to me.” Yoongi burrows his face into my neck again his hair brushing against my bare skin the hand that’s not holding mine drops under the covers finding my hip guiding me to drape my right leg over his waist facing each other sideways.

”Promise? Can you be more specific?” I boldly move my hand caressing with feather-light touches his side I can feel his bare torso and hips under my fingers he shivers and not because of the cold. He’s shivering because I touched him and he’s not wearing a shirt. The thought crosses my mind that the shirt I’m wearing is the one he did wear the whole day but not now. Every other day I would be embarrassed but I quite liked the idea of wearing his clothes in his bed.

”A tease I see.” He recovered quicker than I would like he gave a quick peck onto my shoulder where his shirt didn’t cover that much skin. He cupped my breast above the fabric of my bra the sudden feel of him squeezing me there I whined a little bit too loudly. I pulled my hand away shielding my face due to embarrassment.

”Yoongi.” I shyly call his name. He let his hand stay there but he remained motionless giving my hands each a kiss just where my eyes would be if I didn’t hide behind my limbs. His hand felt warm against me where my bra wasn’t covering his two fingers rested directly on the skin of my breast.

”Do I have your consent baby?” I gulp my shy personality says no but my body says yes for me.

”You can have anything.” I place my palm against his that lays on my body my eyes still closed but I don’t shield my face anymore. The words came out as whispers even though I wanted him to hear me say it. I wanted him to go on.

”Love. Answer me.” I open my eyes again when I feel his hand leave my boobs to cup my face with it instead.

”You can have me. You can fuck me. Did it answer your question or should I be more specific?” I wet my lips poking my tongue against the inside of my cheeks trying to calm down the rapid movement of my heart my hands shook as I grip his hair moving my mouth against his to not just say but show my consent. I want this. I want him.

”No. I think it was explicit enough, I like seeing you blush.” Hearing him say that makes me blush harder and he gifts me with a gummy smile basking in the responsive reactions. I would be more embarrassed if I wouldn’t feel the sticky substance dampening my underwear.

”Do you have something in mind? A preference? Or can I surprise you.” The way he explicitly asks about my sexual preferences makes him appear hotter a new wave of arousal hits me making me grind my thighs together forgetting that Yoongi’s leg is between them. I know he felt the wetness but doesn’t comment on it he instead pushes his knees further up parting my legs.

”You d-decide.” I moan when his knee brushes against my crotch. He hummed delighted by my answer. Placing back his hand once more squeezing my breasts before undoing the clasps behind my back. He slowly lets the material fall he strictly looks into my eyes not wandering downwards seeking out my every reaction. I gave him a little nod he takes it as the permission he needed he moves the cover so he can take a look.

”So pretty.” He sighs into my skin he turns my body to be flat against the bed the cold sheets meeting with my back goosebumps travelling up my spine. ”So soft.” He mumbles the endless of praises dragging his fingers over a nipple before licking it with his tongue a choked moan leaves my parted lips his hair gently caressing the skin. He circles the nipple with his poked out tongue kneading the other neglected one with his free hand. Mewls and sighs, in turn, filling the room trying to keep my voice quiet but it’s hard since the only thing I can concentrate on is his mouth on me and his hands those long fingers as he drags them down on my body a finger slides under the waistband of my panty he stretches the material out before letting it snap back into place. The uncomfortable feeling of it sticking to my folds gets frustrating by every passing minute.

”You smell good.” His raspy voice helps me return from my sudden astonishment I scrape his scalp with my long nails as I weave my fingers through his hair he lets out a low growl my skin covering up the noise the vibration he sends up my body by it makes me tighten my legs around his waist my underwear covered cunt pressed against his firm chest forces a not so silent whine out.

”It’s m-my lotion.” I reply absentmindedly. He hums into my collarbone not sure my answer registered truly in his brain I feel him taking a big inhale before pulling away he pushes himself up with the help of his hands planted beside my head looking with heavily lidded eyes taking in my hazed eyes and swollen lips before connecting our mouths. I almost forgot how good of a kisser Yoongi is.  

The light touch against my inner thigh makes my hip jolt up in surprise Yoongi’s eager mouth swallows all the sounds and whimpers. ”Relax.” He purrs aiming for my hips soothing circles into my skin. I take a few deep breaths Yoongi waits patiently for me to calm down a little the way his eyes sizing me up like I’m some kind of goddess eases some of my nerves. Once he’s positive I’m not going to run away he lets his palm touch me the barrier that’s my underwear stays in place as he drags his fingers directly onto my heat. I feel it throb under his ministrations having confidence after a few moans I let out he gets bolder using more pressure to dip between my folds the underwear’s silky touch lets him move smoothly. ”Can I feel it? I want to make sure you’re wet enough before I do anything else.” Nodding even before the question was fully out I anticipate a laugh or something to tease me about my eagerness. I don’t think I wanted someone this bad before to touch me. But he doesn’t laugh he seems as eager as I feel. He slides a finger under the damp material but he retreats too soon. ”Please, can I take it off?” To persuade me further if his plea wasn’t enough he rubs his fingers where my clit is over my panty. The plea was enough but I’m not complaining. I manage to signal him with a breathy yes. Don’t have to tell him twice he slides the ruined material down my legs his big warm hands gripping my inner thighs preventing my legs from closing before he can take a look.

”Look at that. So pink and swollen for me.” Previously he was careful with every move waiting for approval before doing anything bold but like he’s lost all the continence in him Yoongi drags two fingers up my folds coating his fingers with my arousal letting just the tip of his fingers penetrating just to pull back. I let out the loudest moan blushing as I realise just how loud I sounded but Yoongi doesn’t seem to mind, not at all. He wanted to coax more of those sounds as he bent down parting the lips with his tongue letting out his own moans while tasting me and if it’s even possible at this point I feel more turned on than ever.

”Warm too. Sorry, my love, my hands are a little cold but I hope you don’t mind.” He finally slips a finger in my eyes slightly open he watches me with a grin loving the way I squirm wanting it chuckles deep and I don’t mind at all. The stretch his one digit means feels familiar reminding me when I was chasing relief on my own but his fingers are so so much better longer and thicker. I can’t wait to feel the second one.

”I want to make you cum on my tongue.” Delivering a kittenish lick sucking on my clit for the demonstration before he goes on. ”Just to bring you another orgasm with my fingers.” Yoongi curls the one finger in me rubbing it into my throbbing walls ”Lastly let you cum around my cock.” He throws his head back moaning sinfully just thinking he’s about to make everything he said come true. ”You deserve at least three orgasms but I shouldn’t be greedy your virgin cunt can’t handle three.” He eases another finger in this time the stretch is a bit more uncomfortable.

”Let’s start with two.” He says settled with the idea he places a wet kiss onto my hip before finding my abused clit again sucking and rolling it around his tongue my walls contacts around his two digits I feel the sticky substance coating my inner thighs and dripping onto the sheets the mess, the way Yoongi’s hair tickle my thighs, the way he moves his fingers inside me, the pleasure gets overwhelming something starts to build up promising a relief I never had the chance of feeling before.

”Yoongi fuck, Yoongi” His name spills from my mouth and it seems to encourage him to be faster.

”It’s fine.” He tells before sucking harshly on my clit. ”Cum for me.” The proud grin he forms still buried between my legs and the vibration of his hum makes my legs shake I let my head fall back into the pillows closing my eyes until I see literal stars.

He stops lapping my juices once I’m finished the proud smile still plastered on his face licking his lips capturing the remaining of my pleasure. He looks so hot. I never knew I’m capable of coming this hard.

”Good?” Placing a kiss onto my nose he caresses my arms I didn’t realise I was grabbing onto the sheets this tight I let Yoongi place my hands onto his shoulder blades he moves to get between my legs once more.

Instead of answering, I can’t help but impatiently point out. ”You’re still wearing clothes.” I grab his hips pulling on his sweatpants playfully.

”Wanna take it off?” He asks smirking. I roll my eyes at his cockiness not that he’s all talk when it comes to his skills but he has more ego than he can manage and I’m not going to increase it for him.

”So what? Don’t tell me you are not eager even more than me to bury your dick into my virgin pussy.” His eyes grow bigger for a split second before it regains its original state, so he can be startled too. I’m surprised by my boldness, but god, it’s worth it seeing him so fucked up by those words.

”You’re playing a dangerous game Y/N. I need my self-control right now.” Something shifted in his eyes he looks like he’s about to devour me. Yoongi shifts onto his knees to get rid of the final barriers between us. I close my eyes my shyness returns too soon but Yoongi doesn’t mind it I open my eyes again as he positions myself above me placing a firm kiss onto my lips he senses I’m anxious.

”Do you trust me?” Seeing the open vulnerability in his shiny orbs, not entirely clouded by lust makes my head swim with a lot of suppressed emotion. I feel the urge to smile lifting my head from the pillows beneath me I give him a peck.

”Of course I am.” I kinda like you. I bite into my lips before the next sentence could slip through we’ll talk about this another time. Right, the only thing I want to focus on is Yoongi. Only Yoongi. His tip brushes against my stomach, shit, I haven’t seen how big he is. His lip pressed to mine swallows the tiny moan leaving my lips as he pushes the first inch inside parting my walls in a painful stretch. Fuck. He’s big.

”Tight.” Yoongi moans, more in pleasure than I am currently in but it’s ok. He made me cum I want to see him cum too. ”Relax for me angel I won’t hurt you I promise.” Relishing in the way he caresses my side I try to relax my body he pushes another inch in slowly his tip must be fully buried by now.

”That’s right. You’re doing so well.” He praises his eyebrows knit together in concentration he’s holding himself back because of me. Touched by the gesture I move my hip to meet his advances he slips in deeper than he intended his groan significantly louder by the sudden pleasure.

”Does it hurt?” He pulls himself together to keep the eye contact he caresses the skin under my eye I nod before answering.

”A little.”

”Let’s try a few more thrusts if it still hurts after that I’ll stop and eat you out again. Shit. Maybe I should have made you cum again for the extra lubrication.” Yoongi regretfully gazes at my face.

”It’s fine. Just go slow.” I say the burning is bearable I’m getting used to the feeling slowly but not sure if I can cum again.

��My baby is so tight.” I’m definitely a sucker for those pet names. It helps me focus on his words instead of his slow thrusts. ”I want to make you feel as good as you make me feel. Feeling you wrapped around me a dream come true.” I experimentally squeeze around him and he lets out a loud moan his head nestled into my neck groaning and moaning between filthy words his pace got quicker but I don’t stop him even though it’s not feeling as good as him eating me out. I want to please him though and by the sounds, he seems very pleased.

”Are you alright?” He stops after hearing a louder whiny moan on my part but I don’t let him I circle my hips in place dragging out moans from him but he forces himself to reset his previous slower pace. I’m not having any of it. I want him to cum and want it soon.

”Yoongi” I whine out his name an idea foggily forming at the back of my head. ”Yoongi, I wanna ride you.”

”Are y-you sure?” He stills inside of me waiting for the confirmation and I nod inviting him into a kiss that turns slopy by time. I feel his hands grabbing at my waist to change position this way he sinks in deeper.

Holy shit it feels so much better.

”Fuck. Do you like this?” He grips my hips dragging his cock touching every sensitive part in me as my walls swallow his shaft he pulls me up just to let me sink down with a needy moan I’m starting to feel the appeal.

”Yes. I-ah-think.” I can almost picture the way my eyes roll back behind my skull right now. What was I saying? ”Go faster.” I choke out and Yoongi with a following set of groans obligates I’m too far gone to pay attention to how Yoongi watches with hungry eyes that I ruin the bedsheets.

”I like that you are so messy.” He places a stray hair behind my ears our chests pressed together so he can thrust up faster and harder. Yoongi holds me in place taking control the way his eyes shuts involuntarily and his member twitching inside of me signals that he’s close.

He’s breathtakingly beautiful as he reaches his high he’s so lost in the pleasure my walls provide so tight around him that he doesn’t have the mind to kiss me back so I just press them together for a minute longer. My legs ache because of the exercise but I let him use me to ride out his high the pretty sounds and satisfied look he gives me once seated firmly inside me with our mixed cum spilling out he looks down where our body connects rubbing the skin of my hip lovingly while watching me ruin his sheets. He likes that I’m messy.

”I hope you like me back because I don’t think I could fuck anyone else from now on.” I end up in a pit of laughter leaning my head on his shoulder he feels my body shake with the motion Yoongi whines in overstimulation when I accidentally squeeze his spent member. I peck the skin where my head previously rested before searching for Yoongi’s eyes.

”I do like you back.” I admit it shyly even though there’s nothing to be shy about his dick is still inside for fuck’s sake.

”Glad to hear that.” His grin returns faster than the speed of light. ”I thought I fucked your brains out when you suddenly started laughing. I was concerned for a minute.” I try to hit his shoulder but he’s faster grabbing my hand by the wrist and gives the flesh an attentive kiss the gesture is sweet and melts my heart.

”How are you feeling?” It’s cute how he seeks my reassurance. He lets me move away careful when pulling out so I can finally take the previous position lying down.

”Hm, sore but good. I just need .. some time. I don’t think I can stand up just yet.” I offer my honest reply burying my nose into the duvet that got tossed aside. He leaves the room making me confused but once he’s back with a towel in hand I pierce two and two together. It’s his towel. The thought is enough to make me blush furiously.

”Spread your legs for me.” I take the request as an order shyly spreading my legs so he can clean me up. ”There. All cleaned up.” The bed squeaks under the weight of his one knee pushing me further into the sheets. Yoongi bows down to kiss me his tongue teases my lips as we kiss asking for permission that I eagerly permit.