#they had to break the news to him that it was not in fact normal to feel like that and stuggle that much
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Exchange student: Berlin, Germany
October 01, 2024
Brad had come to Berlin as an exchange student because it was supposed to be the party capital of Europe. He was looking forward to a semester of spring break. But he quickly became disillusioned. There was hardly anyone walking around at the Technical University who looked anything like Spring Break. Most of them were dressed in black, with short hair and pale faces. Brad stood out like a sore thumb. And apart from that, Berlin was very different from what he had imagined. He had been told that Germany was so incredibly clean. Berlin was dirty and run-down. The people were unfriendly. The weather was terrible. By the time he moved into his room in the run-down student dormitory, which had probably last been renovated in the 1980s, he was homesick for Providence.
Tonight was a faculty welcome party. The building was an old factory hall, a ruin. The music was just one thing: deafeningly loud. The people at the party were all stoned or high on pills. It stank of sweat, cigarette smoke and sweet energy drinks. Brad wondered whether he could still change universities. Munich was supposed to be much more civilized than Berlin. Someone gave him a funny-looking pill. It was about 02:00 when Brad left the party. His sweater had disappeared. But it had been better than he had feared.
November 05, 2024
Monday was the day Brad recovered. There weren't usually any really good parties on Mondays. And if there were, he could make an exception. In fact, Brad was the go-to person for many of his fellow students when it came to where to go anyway. Brad was usually extremely well informed. Not necessarily about life at university⊠He had let his attendance at lectures slip a little in the first month. But hey, there was still ages until exams. Tonight was encore.une.fois at the OX! Of course Brad was on the guest list. From 21:00 he was in the gym, pumping up his muscles. And from 01:00 he was on the dance floor. Shit, he had expected something like Springbreak. How boring Springbreak was! Real life was raging here. All it took was a few pills, Red Bull and the right beats. And that was definitely the case today!
At 05:00 the music went off and the cleaning light came on. Brad checked his messages to find out where the best after-hours party was. There were no important lectures on Wednesdays anyway. And he was still far too wound up to sleep.
December 20, 2024
Uni was over until the new year. Actually, he should have been back in Connecticut by now. But Brad wanted to take at least this weekend to Berghain. Moritz had become his friend and business partner. The two were the shooting stars of Berlin's party organizers. Brad had collected 39K followers in the last four weeks alone. His party outfits defined what bouncers wanted to see in the clubs. Normally, DJs had groupies. Or musicians. Moritz and Brad always had a whole cluster of guys and girls hanging around them, basking in their presence and hoping to get shagged by one of them. Particularly lucky ones claimed to have been fucked by both at the same time. Whether this was true was debatable. But as a legend, it was certainly a cool story.
Their gas masks were elaborate custom-made masks that gave off a well-dosed mixture of poppers and laughing gas. Not that the two of them needed it. But it made the intoxication of a party night perfect. There were always two spare masks and the necessary cartridges in their rucksacks. To recharge their gas masks. Or to let very privileged fans share in their intoxication. It was 03:00. Too early to decide whether anyone would get that privilege tonight. Now it was time to dance. The way they only danced at Berghain.
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"The Pressure of His Lips" - ex!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Hi! Like three (3) people have asked me to start posting fics on here, so here we go. I'm new to posting on tumblr, but I'm a wattpad and ao3 veteran, so be nice. I'm still trying to figure out the formatting and everything for this place :P
Summary: After breaking up due to your secret relationship being brought to the surface, you are not handling the separation well. Too much vodka and lonely nights end with you accidentally Bucky from the bathroom floor.
Warnings: Alcohol use, heavy intoxication, mentions of smoking weed, slight hint at SA history upon the reader, angst, alpine mention!!!! let me know if I missed any!
DISCLAIMER: This is an excerpt from a bigger fic I've been writing in which the self-insert has a history of SA. It is hinted at for one sentence in this specific blurb.
By all means, I shouldâve been the one that managed to keep my head above water. Dad hit rock bottom when he was my ageâ after my grandparents died. He was no stranger to tell me about it. It was always an example of what not to do. Even Mom had her struggles after she lost her brother.Â
I had every picture perfect reason to stay away from anything that could drag me down like a weight in still water. Which is why I couldnât tell you how I ended up at the bottom of a bottle on a Monday night in uptown Manhattan.Â
For a long time, I refused to drink more than once in heavy social settings after what happened when I was seventeen. But this? I didnât care anymore. I needed whatever would keep him and my parents and the team out of my head.Â
The problem I was running into, however, was that by the time I was cross-faded in a mass of bodies in a bar uptown, he was the only thing I had the ability to think about.Â
Everything I wouldnât confront during the day when I was sober chased me down until I was curled up in the corner of a bathroom stall.Â
The smell of weed clouded my senses as the cold tile floor hit the backs of my thighs. The vodka still on my tongue made me dizzy and I could feel my heart beating like a drum in my head.
Every memory axed its way into my head like a migraine I couldnât shake. I could spend every night like this, I could dance with strangers I didnât care about, I could swear off men to my best friend and demand that I was completely fine, but I would always end up like this. Thinking about how I could still feel the pressure of his lips on my skin and if I tried hard enough, the temperature of the bathroom tiles almost felt like that of his arm under my fingers whenever we were curled up together.Â
I couldnât keep a straight thought. It all flashed through my head in images I couldnât shake.Â
My phone was vibrating.Â
I fumbled for it, where it was tucked into the front of my dress, and I didnât even check who was calling when IÂ tapped the screen and held it to my ear. I sniffled, wiping my nose. My cheeks were wet.Â
I was crying. That seemed to be pretty normal for me these days.Â
âHello?âÂ
I blinked. Great, now I was hallucinating voices. Iâd never reached that point of being wasted. âNat,â I said, rubbing my eyes. I probably just ruined my makeup already. âWhatâs up?â I did my best to sound sober. Probably didnât work.
There was a heavy sigh. âYou didnât mean to call me,â he said.Â
âYou called me,â I replied.Â
âNo, I did not. Are you⊠Are you okay?âÂ
âI am fine,â I said. âIâm not⊠supposed to talk to you.â âI know, angel.â Another sigh, a shuffle of something. Maybe blankets. It couldnât have been that late.Â
âAre you sleeping?â
âItâs almost four in the morning.â
My head was pounding, swimming⊠I couldnât quite breathe right. âYou donât really sleepâŠâ
âNo, I donât. Less now. Where are you?âÂ
âWhy?â I felt defensive all of a sudden. No matter the fact I didnât think I could get up off this floor if the building was on fire.Â
âBecause youâre drunk, sweetheart. And youâre alone. Itâs not safe.â
âYou donât know that Iâm- if Iâm alone.â
A brief pause. âYes, I do. Do you know where you are?âÂ
I was picking at a loose thread on the hem of my dress. âIâmâŠâ I squeezed my eyes shut. That string wrapped around my finger twice. âIâm in the bathroom.â
âOkay, hold onââ I heard a door shut. It was quiet for a second. âI know where you are. You stay in the bathroom, okay? Iâll come get you.â
âBut youââ
âNo, you stay where you are.â I shrank a little. âHear me?âÂ
âYeahâŠâ âGood. Iâll be there in ten minutes.â
I think I fell asleep after that, because the next thing I remember was hearing a commotion of voicesâ only one of which I recognized.Â
Then it got so bright as the stall door was pushed open and I swear it felt like my heart that had dropped dead almost a month ago was beating again.Â
Buckyâs face was a mix of emotions as he touched my cheek. âSweetheartâŠâ He said, letting out a breath.Â
âWhy are you here?â I asked, blinking a few times to try and see clearly. If he was here, I wanted to feel it, see it. All of it.Â
âIâm here for you, doll.â
âBut you hate me.â
He looked at me like I was crazy. âNo, I donât, baby. I donât hate you. But we need to get you home, come on.â
Without waiting for me to say anything, he lifted me to my feet. âWhere are your shoes?â he asked. I just shrugged.Â
As I limped my way to the bathroom exit, one of the other girls stopped him, demanding that he either explain how he knew me, or set me down. If I was sober, I might have hugged her for that. âHeâsâŠâ I started.Â
She cast a worried glance from me, to the man holding me up. Bucky sighed and pulled out his phone, showing her the screen. âSheâs mine, promise.â I barely caught a glimpse of the wallpaper. It was a picture Avery had taken of us when we were in Atlanta, we were in the kitchen, not even aware she was watching.Â
Once we were past the crowds, he shoved the door open and helped me outside. The chilly air shocked me a little back into my senses, but not much.Â
He pulled the car door open and helped me into the passenger seat before rounding the hood and climbing in. âI feel like lecturing you on how dangerous this is might be pointless because I donât think youâre gonna remember any of it.â
I sniffled, wiping my cheeks. âI thought I was⊠fine.â âIâm sure you did,â he said, pulling onto the street. âAvery would have a heart attack if she knew about this, you know?âÂ
âYeah⊠Itâs okay.â
âItâs not,â he sighed, shoving a hand through his hair. âThis isnât like you.â
âSure it is,â I replied as I looked out the window. âItâs in my genes.â Bucky glanced at me, but didnât say anything. When we pulled up outside my apartment building, I paused. âHow do youââ
âI had a feeling something like this would happen. I got it from Nat.âÂ
âShe gave it to you?âÂ
âI had to ask. Beg, actually.â
âThat isnât like you,â I said, quoting his own words. He cast me that same look he always gave me when I said something annoying, but valid. I smiled a little, tipping my head against the headrest of the car as I watched him climb out.Â
When he got to my side and pulled the door open, he didnât give me an option. Next thing I knew, he was scooping me into his arms and I didnât have it in me to fight. I leaned closer, letting my body relax for the first time in weeks. I could scold myself for this in the morning.Â
âWhatâs the door code?â he asked me.Â
âMy birthday,â I replied in more of a mumble than anything. âItâsââ
âI know your birthday, angel.âÂ
I sighed and nodded as we stepped into the warmth of the lobby. I didnât question him as he held me the whole way to my apartment, his fingers occasionally brushing against my body as if it was muscle memory.Â
He pressed the same code into my door keypad and shoved the door open.Â
âDonât let the cat out,â I muttered.Â
âThe whatâ Oh my god.â I heard my little white kitten meow up at him. âThatâs Snowball,â I said. âOr Alpine. I canât choose.â
He sighed, a small smile on his face. âI like Alpine.â
Bucky carried me to the master bedroom and set me on the bed. I rubbed my eyes, the ache behind them starting to grow. He disappeared for a second and when he came back, he put a glass of water in my hand. âDrink this,â he said, setting my shoes in my closet. I wondered briefly where he found them before he returned from the closet with the Avengers Compound sweatshirt that used to be his, but I had reclaimed. âYou canât sleep in that dress,â he said. âOr that makeup.âÂ
âIâll be fineââ I started.Â
âNo. Youâre gonna change. Iâll give you aââ
âI canât get the zipper myself,â I said quietly. âItâs not- Itâs not a ploy⊠Promise.âÂ
He helped me to my feet and turned me around before tugging at the zipper. I felt the air hit my back a second before his hand landed at my waist. âAre you gonna remember anything from tonight?âÂ
âI hope so,â I said softly. Other words for definitely not.Â
Bucky sighed and dropped his head to my shoulder. âI miss you,â he breathed, lips brushing against my skin. âMore than Iâve ever missed anyone.âÂ
A pain lodged itself in my chest. It was so deep that in this moment I genuinely didnât think itâd ever leave me. And if it did, it might just leave a hole where it sat. âBuckyâŠâÂ
âGet changed. Iâll be right back.â
When I felt his body heat disappear from me, I dropped my dress to the ground and tugged on the sweatshirt heâd set on the bed. I didnât bother with shorts, just left my underwear on.Â
I dropped onto the edge of the bed, finished my water, held my hands in my lap.Â
Bucky came from the bathroom and clicked on the lamp beside my bed. He took my face in his hand and with the warm rag in his hand, wiped it gently along my face. âClose your eyes,â he said softly.Â
I did as I was told. It wasnât as in depth as I couldâve myself, but it was enough to keep my eyes from hurting in the morning.
He tossed the rag in the hamper and guided me into bed. âYou need to sleep,â he said softly.Â
âIâm not used to sleeping alone,â I mumbled against my pillow.Â
âI know, sweetheart,â he replied, fingers combing through my hair. âMe either. But youâre gonna be okay.âÂ
I felt exhaustion coming for me like a thief in the night. âYou think so?âÂ
âI know so. Sleep, baby.âÂ
A breath escaped me. I didnât have the energy to speak anymore.
As sleep pulled me away, I felt his kiss against my head. Then the light clicked off and it was gone like a dream.Â
#bucky barnes#the winter soldier#breakup fic#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#marvel fanfiction#self insert#marvel#fanfic#writing#james bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes
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any headcanons for my boy geno?
Mobility aid Geno! yknow that DT did some damage (Papyrus carries Geno at the end of aftertale id i remember-). Geno probably uses a variety of mobility aids, defaulting to a cane or crutches :]
#my art#utmv#utau#kitt answers#geno sans#his friends probably decorate his aids while he just leaves them be#ink paints them and blue covers them in stickers#he has other aids like those grabber claws (?)#u can't remember the name of it but it really helps him#he probably a bit squishy like the amalgamates#but less. . .falling apart#only a little hurt for him#i like to think he never thought about it and he mentioned how he felt to someone far too casually#they had to break the news to him that it was not in fact normal to feel like that and stuggle that much#he feels much better#now#defitely feel many times trying to do a wheely or stand on jsut his crutches when he got bored#:]
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"careful, or i'll quote that"
#adamandi#was going to be normal but then this scene popped into my head and played on loop and like#guys this scene just makes me Miserable. they're so friends now they're so happy and funny and then later in the show#she manipulates him and he tries to kill her and like. my god beatrix vincent friendship. omg.#im so. it kills me. i realise these arent the most accurate character styles but i Had to get it out. oh my god. literally the other day i#i was like ''oh haha im not going to directly draw scenes from the show im going to be Thinky and Extra'' but no actually sometimes the#the scenes from the show just hit. this line the delivery the Situations it kills me. im so hnnghghf about them#something also maybe about rewatching media knowing the whole plot and the extra Tragedy it all brings also. like to know the ending will#break your heart (but be also some sort of stunning catharsis) and to watch it all!!! again!!!! aaagh.#fun facts about the first time i watched adamandi proper after looking through the tumblrs and half-spoiling it for myself.. i went in with#the strangest assumptions of portia dies/ vincent makes a virus that kills the other nominees instead of actually stabby stabby and the#new invented biological thing would make him the winner a-la frankenstein style //. quincy cuts off his hand????? i am not sure where any#of these came from T-T but im glad i was wrong on literally every count.#miscellaneous brainrots from re-watching.. in the very very start i think vincent is wearing a mask in word to the wise?? like it was probs#a covid safety thing but it makes me go teehee for some reason. like the whole infectious thing was foreshadowed LMAO (approx 35 seconds in#also the balloons. and the admin. and the balloons. the way it's horrific and the balloons gently rain down#and you can see them bounce in the stunned silence. ooo that little detail. what a moment.#also at this point? i have been noticing the little inconsistencies in actions btwn shots but a) they're not seeable unless you're looking#Closely like i was for specific moments as references.. and b) it makes u think about the inconsistency of theatre as a medium and how nth#is ever delivered the same two ways which is really just !!!! to me. smth smth so so many ways to intepret characters and how everything is#always in flux every single cycle. theatre medium my beloved.#last side note from now: i am so abnormal about the marmorius society members who were phaethon nominees in their own right and instead#perished helping ambrose with HIS project. like. that is some sort of love there isn't it? like???? yes they're all bullies and awful but.#i've been reaching tag limit really quickly with all the recent posts. rambles i guess. so so many thoughts. well actual tags now i guess!#vincent aurelius lin#beatrix valeria campbell
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@thicketville: meta: did john ever want to go to college? what would he have studied if he did? if not, did he ever want any sort of higher education, like a vocational degree or apprenticeship? â META TOPICS.
i think college was always a very distant concept for him growing up: more 'something that happens to posh people in the big cities' than a potential career path. john's father was a dock worker before losing his arm and most of their relatives did labor-intensive jobs in and around either the coal mines or the docks, so for anyone who actually thought john had a future â which was very few people, if anyone â it was sort of expected that he'd wind up in the same realm of work. they could never hope to afford college, so cheryl wouldn't have brought it up to him as a possibility, because john was a dreamer of a kid and would've gotten himself in trouble with their father if he insisted on pursuing it.
honestly, john's childhood was lived one day at a time, and nobody really thought he was going to survive past the teenage years (least of all john), so he really never considered a future for himself at all, other than "one day i'll get out of here". and even that felt like a pipe dream before he discovered magic. these days, i don't think he spends time considering what might have been anymore, because the past is the past and it eats him alive already without him helping it along, but in a perfect, perfect world, i think he would've loved college, and maybe gone into creative writing.
#thicketville#i'm so very normal about constantine's childhood i swear :')#the fact that the issue 'dead boy's heart' that shows us his childhood is talking about both the story content And john....#he was a dead boy from the second he was born. expected to die early or be in trouble forever. nobody caring which one it ended up being#but he had SUCH a big heart and SUCH an active imagination!! he was SO smart and well-meaning and compassionate!!#he was always making up stories and play-acting and reading and inventing new worlds to put himself in! he SO would have been a writer!!#but everyone told him he was dark. told him he was nothing. told him he was broken. and he started to believe it and become it#god i just think all the time about how everybody looked at him as a kid and went 'don't worry dear the world will break you soon enough'#and Nobody thought to try and protect him from that. ends me#( headcanons. ) I'M JUST LIKE THE BASTARDS I'VE HATED ALL ME LIFE.#( answered. ) THIS IS JOHN CONSTANTINE. FUCK OFF.
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One thing I do look forward to about in-person work for the first time in four and a half years, even if it's 28 miles of travel both ways right during the worst winter months, is I can't be my father's free Chore Servant when he's too busy (read: disorganized and lazy) to sort things before he leaves for the day
#just this morning the guy calls me eight minutes before my shift starts when I'm still in bed trying to wake up and goes#'oh by the way I didn't take the dogs outside can you handle that'#this is a process that takes five minutes normally#on top of the three to five i need to get dressed use the bathroom etc#AND one of the dogs is on medication right now#add another two#also this man was standing around in his kitchen this morning at seven chatting with his employee and his gf#he ABSOLUTELY could have taken them out#fucking prick#lucky i can clock in from my phone and my current employer is none the wiser#if he tries that shit with my new job in two weeks i will literally not be home by the time he calls#in fact i'm just gonna silence my phone. I will be thrilled to not have to think about him all day#will never forget the one time he was in the fucking mediteranian and had me put together the checks for his employees#'oh it'll take you like five minutes'#yeah that was my entire lunch break asshole. thanks.#the more i think about it the more pissed I am I'm still stuck in this fucking house#I need to secure that car before I fucking snap#dylawa rants#dylawa rambles
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Heeeelp my relatives started gaslighting me again. I thought they stopped doing that đ
#đȘ.txt#fucking hell why i wasn't born in a household with adjusted people#did i fucking kill someone in a past life or something#anyways! this past month i had to deal with: my relatives saying that im a disrespectful overdramtic brat when#*checks notes* i said things like 'no thank you' or 'please dont treat me this way' or! you wont believe it! 'please wait me finish this#video that is at its end' when mr.fucking asshole demanded to hand him the TV just bc he wanted to watch it at that moment#and couldn't bear to wait 3 mins#and then he started screaming at me and saying im too disrespectful and im throwing tantrums. when i kid you not i just said 'please wait a#sec' and thats it!#also the same mr.fucking asshole who thinks he raised me but actually didn't spend a whole ass week critizing things on my body#and got pissy when i told him that he was being an asshole and doesn't have any right to do that#ah yes when i tried to vent a little about the TV incident to another relative they kept telling me#'calm down! breath!' in the most condensing voice you can imagine when i was literally normal#im going fucking crazy#also some weeks ago ms.Devil went crazy when i said to her that i wouldn't use the super mega feminine underwear that she bought to me#because 1. i dont need any new underwear and never asked for it and 2. they arent my style and she knows that#and the she started saying that yes i asked for it when i literally didn't?? and when i told her that she went batshit insane#anyways im wenting batshit insane too. because my only hope to get money is if i have a laptop#because of school and also the fact that im disabled and i know that if i try to balance school + work i will break#so my only hope is to get a laptop and with that laptop do things that brings me money. like programming and publishing stories
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Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
Reader who gets pregnant off of a one night stand with some soldier during armed forces day, showing your appreciation for his service a little too well.
You had a support system, friends who joked about you having way too much fun, hence your predicament, others already offering to buy things for the baby and your parents who couldn't be happier to meet their grandchild.
But what about the father?
Well, it's not exactly like you could track him down. Fuck, you didn't even know the man's name, only how he made you feel, his filthy words strumming in your ear, big hands tight around your waist, hips slamming away in a desperate chase.
Let's forget how you leg-locked him.
When your daughter was born, everything changed, and time slowed down. She was a quiet baby, barely crying or having any outbursts like a normal child would but outspoken in her own little way. That chunky thing came out of the womb with a glare. Brown eyes staring down anyone and everyone but you.
That's something she definitely got from her father. You vividly remember how his umber eyes watching you from across the bar. He was like an eagle waiting for the perfect moment to strike his prey. A perfect soldier.
So, you named your daughter Adira in memory of his strength. That's one thing he could have.
Adira loved to be by your side. Her chubby cheeks pressed into the nook of your neck, holding you close with strength of a thousand babies. Your clingy little thing was a koala, always by her mommy's side, never straying far no matter how curious she got. When she learned to walk, her favorite thing became to hug your leg, especially while in stores. She hated people, wearing a tiny scowl whenever customers passed by tucking herself closer to you.
Maybe it was a good thing her father wasn't around. Having to compete for her first words would've been a bloodbath.
You spent two years in bliss. The fact that you were a single mother an afterthought to raising what you considered a blessing.
With Adira's second Christmas coming up, you wanted to do something special. She loved trains and found them absolutely amusing, often mimicking the honk as she ran around your apartment. Thankfully, there was a train ride for kids around the park during this time of year.
Here, you stood in line, bundled up to the nines. Big poofy coat, warm gloves, and fuzzy boots. As the crowd moved, Adira clung close, arms wrapped around your leg, glowering at any passerby with an annoyed look on her rosy cheeks.
That one was new. Maybe something else she got from her father.
The two of you took steps in tow, keeping Adira close and comfortable as the train came into view. Her expression shifted, excitement palpable. "Twain!" She squealed, jumping up and down.
Before you could respond to Adira's childlike joy, a man bumped into you by accident, nearly stumbling over his own feet. He turns to look at you, blue eyes meeting yours, but you were too focused on the weird ass Mohawk on his head.
People wore still those?
"Sorry bout that lass." The man starts to apologize, a Scottish accent lacing his voice.
That breaks your stare, laughing awkwardly to mask your wandering gaze. "Oh no, it's fine. You should be careful. you might slip on ice."
He nods, giving you a kind smile. The Scottish man starts to leave, but the look your kid was giving him sent shivers down his spine.
Little Adira was giving him a fierce stare down from behind your leg before ultimately cutting her eyes at him as if he were merely a nuisance.
"Next in line! Mctavish!"
The man doesn't stay after that. You assume that it was him they were calling with the way he hurried off. Hope he doesn't fall, seemed like a nice guy.
Soap can't help but do a double take when be gets to the front. The little rascal was wearing his Lieutenants face, hawk eyeing anyone who dared got to close. It was like looking in a mirror.
He nudged Gaz, making a gesture to look back without making it obvious. "See the lass and her bairn in line?"
Gaz gives him a raised brow, looking back for a second before turning around. "There's a lot of kids with their mother's, Johnny."
Soap glances back, double checking to make sure you were still in line. âThe lass with the wee oneâsheâs got the same wicked look as Lt. You cannae miss her.â
Gaz rolls his eyes but humors Soap by looking once more, his eyes scanning the crowd until they land on a little girl already mean-mugging him from a distance. He swiftly turns around, blinking in surprise, trying to comprehend what he saw. "Uh..."
Soap only nods in agreement. That was Ghost's face, on a kid no less. He wastes no time, elbowing Roach and getting him to look back as well, leaving the other Sergeant in the same shock as Gaz. "That is not a face a kid should have."
"Agreed." Gaz added, shuddering at the thought.
"Where's the cap?" Soap asks, the train ride no longer feeling like fun now that heâs discovered the jackpot.
"Market place with Lt. for cigs," Gaz knowingly remarked, remembering that Price had run out on their way here.
"Well, let's go show them a Christmas miracle," Soap shot up from his seat all too eagerly.
The sergeants just got their Christmas present.
#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley#simon riley#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#sunshine-sunni
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My Oh My - R.S.
Synopsis. Trick or treat! The mean Ănmate in Room 6/9 doesnât want halloween candy - he wants something else much, much sweeter.
Pairing. Ryomen Sukuna x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, Ănmate! Sukuna, slight foĂłdplay, creampĂes, brĂ t-taming, use of âgĂłod girlâ, MEAN softĂe Sukuna, PĂSSYDRUNK Sukuna, oraI (fem receiving), fĂngering, Sukunaâs piercings and tattoos, dry-hĂșmping, squĂrting, spĂtting, bĂłdy worshĂp, exhĂbitionism, slight Gojo x Reader, pet names, swĂ©aring.
Word count. 6.7k (sigh)
A/N. Yes, the seventh day of k!nktober had to be Sukuna even tho Iâm a Gojo-gaggerâŠ
âNanami chill.â
Itâs twelve in the dead of Halloween, and Nanami Kento does, in fact, not chill - not when heâs five hours deep into overtime at the most high security prison in all of Japan, running on only three cups of caffeine and the promise of a day off sometime in the next year.Â
âYou know I canât do that.â he rubs his throbbing temples, heaving out a sigh as he often does. Taking one long look around the glaringly empty surveillance office, âEspecially not today of all days.â
Youâre humming in flippant agreement, but that only makes the furrow in your partnerâs brows deepen even more. âI know I know. But donât you think the inmates deserve something a lilâ special today? I mean, he-â Pointing at the grainy CCTV footage on your computer screen - showing one, Ryomen Sukuna, in his padded cell. Watching. Waiting. â-didnât get a single visitor all year.â
And before Nanami can even think to open his mouth, youâre already dusting down your uniform. Grabbing the bowl of candy propped between you two that youâd swiped from the break room.Â
âWait-â
âAfter all, whatâs the worst that could happen?â
Now, youâve always been told that youâre a little softer than most when it comes to your inmates - which perhaps wasnât the best quality to have when your section was filled to the brim with the most infamous of yakuza and serial criminals. But they respected you. Hell, Nanami loved to roll his eyes at this one but - you think they almost liked you.
Especially Ryomen Sukuna.
You shiver at the long, long list of crimes of his that you had to memorize in your early days - distinctly remembering the way your laptop had crashed with just how far you had to scroll.Â
Honestly, you werenât surprised that the most wanted crime boss across the globe wouldnât get anything other than public threats and a few snarling officers that laugh smugly in his face. Though, you have had to sift out a few perfumed fan mail from time to time.Â
And even before youâd started this job, you knew of him - who didnât?Â
The King of Curses, they called him. And what a king he was.
Some say he was just a crook. Others say he was a beast that seemed like he had four arms and twice the power of any normal human being.Â
Right before his arrest, the Curses owned half of Japanâs revenue - he was untouchable. With his deceivingly innocent signature pink hair, those circling tattoos all across his body, and the dark, dark bloodthirst to get whatever he wanted. Whenever. And fast.Â
Itâd made international news when he was finally caught - only after a long, agonizing syndicate war between himself and the Six Eyes. It was your first day working here, and you were there to spy it firsthand when he was brought in. Shackles clanking along the metallic prison floor, towering well above the eight officers by his side, being hauled into that specialized cell like some animal.Â
And, yet, through it all Sukuna was smiling - smiling like he knew something that everyone in this building didnât.Â
It still burns into your memory the way heâd stopped right in his tracks for the first time on his way up here, stalling for just a second. Two. Before looking right into your widened eyes, devilish grin only growing at your trembling figure.
Ryomen Sukuna had his eyes on you from the moment those handcuffs locked him in here.Â
And he still did.
âHey there, Kuna-â youâre humming after the long, tedious task of unlocking all sixteen padlocks on his heavy metal door. It clamors to a shut behind you with a deafening clang! Locked from the inside. With him. Alone. âHow are we doing today?â
Sukuna was sat on the padded floor of his cell, knees brought up to his broad chest. If you didnât know any better, youâd have said he almost looked like a scolded child - had it not been for the custom-made metal cuffs that restrained him up to his very forearms. A matching leather muzzle drawn tight to cover half of his pretty face.Â
He was the very epitome of all you should stay away from in this prison.Â
And, yet, you find yourself walking towards him, carefully trying not to step on the hefty chains of his shackled ankles.Â
It surrounds you like an iron serpent, clinking lightly when heâs raising his half-lidded eyes to look up at you. âHeh- will it reduce my sentence if I say sâbetter now that youâre here, brat?âÂ
Sukunaâs deep baritone was husky with disuse, hitching sharply at the end of his sweet little nickname for you. From what little you could make out behind the muzzle, you catch the slow, sultry curl of his plump lips. âOr should I say-â His gaze trickles down to your glinting golden badge, narrowing. â-officer.â
Youâre rolling your eyes, âYou and I both know weâre past all that, Sukuna.â
âNot past that enough, dontcha think?â heâs cracking his neck with a slight tilt side by side, as if he hadnât even realized how long heâd been sitting here until youâd wandered your way inside. Cocking his head up slightly at the small glass bowl still clutched in your hands, âSomethinâ sweet from someone sweet fâme?â
âOh-â youâre sputtering out. He knew exactly what buttons to push to tease and toy with you without even lifting a finger. â-yes, trick or treat! Since itâs Halloween I thought I might as well share the spirit.â
Heâs bellowing out a husky laugh that rumbles from deep within his chest, and you have to tear your eyes away from the slight, sinful sliver of tan skin that peeks out at the jostle of his thin cotton t-shirt.Â
You hated to admit it - but you almost understood exactly why Sukuna got so many fan letters that you had to throw out. A secret youâd whispered to Nanami over break and then never again after he fully ignored you for a week afterwards.Â
Sukuna takes his languid time stretching out his limbs, and you get the distinctly hot feeling that heâs doing this on purpose. One eye cracked to watch your every jolt when the hem of his t-shirt raises just a bit too high, when his long, long legs nudging lightly against your feet.Â
You huff, âWell, would ya like some or not? Because I can just give all of it to Mahito in the next cell-â
âAh, youâre so damn hot when youâre mad.â he grins, and now you know heâs having fun with you. âFuckinâ demanding, too.âÂ
Heâs bringing up his two firmly restrained arms up to your line of vision. âAnd, I donât know if youâve noticed, silly girl, but mâa little ah- preoccupied, here.â
Oh, right.Â
Shit.Â
It wouldâve been so easy to just move your fingers over to the keys in your backpocket and unlock his handcuffs for the slightest second. So easy to shut his cocky mouth up by doing the very things he knows he wonât goad you into doing.Â
But you sneak a glimpse up at the camera positioned at the very corner of the room - trained on the hunched over-figures of the two of you - as if to say, âHey, see, Nanami?âÂ
âNice try.â And you swear you hear the great Ryomen Sukuna gasp - gasp - a sharp, tiny inhale when you reach out towards the very back of his muzzle. Your fingers scratching up lightly against his silken tresses as you feel for the clasp, letting it fall to the ground in a sad pile. Soft - itâs the first thing on your mind, and the next was how unfairly attractive Sukuna looked without his muzzle. âBut youâre not going anywhere.â
He just beams up at you, showing off his slightly sharpened canines. Facial tattoos almost as sinful as the darkened glint in his eyes, âHeh- as if Iâd wanna go absolutely anywhere else right now.â
Before you can snap back - or more likely, make a fool out of yourself to his amusement - he cranes his neck desperately upwards. âSo? Jusâ gonna stand there givinâ me a pretty view or what?â
Too soon, youâre realizing what he wants.
And too readily, youâre crouching down till youâre eye-level with his greedy gaze. Hastily unwrapping one of the candies, âOpen wide.â
Sukuna only grins. âGet closer would ya? Mânot a fuckinâ giraffe now, am I?â
Fuck.Â
Wordlessly, you inch closer.
âCloser. These chains arenât as long as they look yâknow.â
And closer.Â
âJust a bit more- I donât bite. Promise.â
And-Â
âGood girl.â
Before you know it - Sukuna has you exactly where he wants you. Losing your fragile balance to topple over into his awaiting lap, manspread, cushioning your fall. His biceps flex against his restraints, as if some second nature of his wanted to wrap those tattooed arms around your waist.
âI-â youâre gasping, palms gliding over his feeble uniform. Feeling every curve and divot along his hard front- fuck, he felt like a wall of bricks. So toned underneath that fabric, your chin rests softly on the valley between his plush pecs. âIâm so sorry- I didnât mean to-â
âSâperfect though, isnât it?â heâs cutting you off, leaning in so close now that you could feel your cheeks heat with each of his feverish puffs of air. The very tip of his nose kissing yours. âNow you can reach me- honestly, why complain when life gives ya lemons, woman.â
Your breath hitches, âIâŠâ
âSo? Gonna gimme some of that sweetness?â
Youâre still unsure of whatâs happening. And all you can do is to wordlessly bring the sweet treat up to his lips, almost flinching when the warm softness of his lips brush up against your fingertips.Â
And shit, you know what it must look like on the outside, you know that Nanamiâs probably halfway through jumping out of his seat at the surveillance office already.Â
But you really canât bring yourself to think about that right now - not when Sukunaâs wrapping his rosy lips around your fingers. Eyes drooping shut slowly. Lazily. Lingering longer than necessary when his tongue swipes at the candy.Â
It all but melts in your hand, and as soon as youâre about to pull back-
âHold right there fâme now.â
Youâre sure if Sukunaâs hands were freed then heâd have claimed a strong grip on your wrist already, because he was just nuzzling his face into your touch. Sighing out, âCanât have my officer all dirty now, can I?â
His long, pink tongue comes up to just drag along your digits, making you keen at the slight scratch of his soft taste buds. One by one. Each of your fingers. Sucking, groaning.Â
Smiling at you slyly, heâs dragging his tongue in between your index and your middle finger, slurping up all the sweetened candy from before. âWhat? Cat got yer tongue?â
âY-you-â
âY-y-y-you-â he mocks, baritone voice a few octaves dramatically higher than usual. Through his smirk, Sukuna bites down on the very tip of your index, making you wince at the sharp sting of his canines. âIf ya got somethinâ to say then spit it out like the big girl you are.â
Heâs so leeringly smug, watching back as you struggle to meet his intense gaze as if it was his favorite show. Oh, how he wants to tease you about that little good girl routine you put whenever you stop by his cell - always smiling, always in that snug uniform that made you look so irresistible, always talking to him so sweetly as if he wasnât the king of curses himself.
Never in his life would he admit it, but it was soâŠcute.
And Sukuna half-expects you to jump back this very second, to throw another one of your pouts his way and scamper off back to the safety of your office. He expects you to-
âKiss me.â
Oh.Â
Fuck.
That was not what Sukuna expected - never in the hundreds of years he was sentenced to rot in this prison.
But, well, looking down at the way you were splayed out so prettily on his lap - your chin jutting forwards, hands steadied on his pecs, glossed-up lips all pursed for him - how could he ever say no?
In a split-second, heâs kissing you.Â
And youâre kissing him back and fuck- is it intoxicating.
Sukuna meshes his lips against yours so slowly, savoring. Angling his head just enough to suckle on your honeyed lips, youâre feeling his hips gently buck upwards, drinking up your light groans.Â
You mewl when he slides his soft tongue between your lips. And thatâs when you learn that Sukuna has a tongue piercing, cold and metallic against your lips. He tastes so sweet - exactly like the artificial strawberry from the sweet earlier and-
âHah-â youâre gasping at the soft clink! of something sweet, something hard being placed all prettily right in the middle of your tongue - the candy. Brows raising, âIsnât that-â
âSo what if it is?â heâs grunting, not letting you part too far away before sitting up even straight to surge his lips against yours. Mellow. Addicted. Sukuna just loved how sweet you were on him - even more so than that godforsaken candy. Heâs craning upwards to nip lightly at your bottom lip, âGot a problem?â
You were so pliant on top of him, swiveling your hips down lazily at his question instead of answering. Over and over. And Sukuna almost finds it in himself to taunt you until you answer- before one manicured hand of yours grips his face, letting his sharp jaw slack open.Â
Only giving the candy a few drippingly wet swirls inside your mouth before spitting - a thick wad of candied spit right onto Ryomen Sukunaâs tongue. Glistening against his piercing.
And he takes it.Â
Surprisingly, hypnotically takes it.Â
He groans, eyes rolling to the back of his head when he mouths in that tiny piece of strawberry candy back. You hear the crunch! of it underneath his teeth, kissing you even deeper to show off how heâd swallowed every tiny shard. Â
Curling his legs around your form, itâs all it takes for his gaze to drop half-lidded, chest panting - heaving - he smiles a dangerous curve of his lips against yours.Â
Sharp teeth glinting against your own, he chuckles. âI think weâre gonna have a lot of fun, dontcha think, brat?â
You can only take it when he rolls his yearning hips up into yours. You feel so dizzy at the massive outline of his half-hardened cock underneath you - solid, thorough inches girthing upwards against your heated cunt.Â
âBut first-â His teeth bite down on your lower lip, and he pulls. â-think mâgonna hafta hah- teach ya to be a good girl fâme.â
Clang!
All of a sudden, the heavy ripping of metal rings across your dazed head - and Sukunaâs just tearing apart his durable metallic handcuffs as if they were made of nothing but paper.
âWhat-â you gasp rubs over where the tough restraints had rubbed his skin redly raw, oh he just basks in all your sputtering disbelief. âYou could remove it- but- but that was special grade?â
âYa really thought a pile of trash like that would keep me put? Of course, I could fuckinâ get out, donât be silly, woman.â He quirks a slitted brow with genuine confusion - almost as if he was offended at the very thought. And before you know it, Sukunaâs throwing away the useless pieces of junk towards a nestled corner of the cell - hitting exactly on the bullseye of that damn CCTV he hated so much. Both of you watch when it topples brokenly to the ground. He hums, low and sultry, âI just hadnât found a good ânough reason until now.â
Almost immediately, his hands are on you. Everywhere. Anywhere.
Coaxing such pretty whines out of you when Sukuna ravages along every inch of your body, large calloused palms kneading down your tits, your waist, grabbing a handful of your ass.Â
âOhh- this sâthe life.â he groans, all ten of his thick digits squeezing and teasing you. Heâs leaning down to nip lightly at your ear lobe, âAlmost makes me forget what a naughty girl ya actually are.â
âIâm not-â you answer immediately, but it comes out much more breathless than you intended and both of you know that.Â
âOh yeah?â Sukuna jostles the two of you so that youâre fully laid out across his hulking body now, and youâre squirming already - desperately trying to wiggle your hips down to where he was throbbing. To glide the sopping wet place between your thighs down his rock-hard erection. For this, youâre gifted with a branding slap! on the curve of your ass, Sukuna holding you firmly in place. âDoesnât explain why youâre already sâfuckinâ wet like a slut, my pretty baby.â
You lick up the tattoo on his chin, âBut- but Kuna-â
Another needy grind - another smack.
âNow what did I jusâ fuckinâ say?â he hisses, and the primal rasp in his tone just makes you drenched.Â
And Sukuna notices - of course, he notices. Drunken red eyes widening, oh, he could almost feel how fucking soaking you were through all those clothes. Too many clothes, in his opinion.
Which is why he has one hand fisting furiously at your smart uniform shirt, not a single word or apology uttered before he just shreds it right off your heaving chest.
âOh my god-â you squeal, your hands coming up to clutch at the tatters of fabric and your badge. And your lips pout out in such a way that makes his cock just twitch, mumbling out stubbornly, âThat was my new uniform-â
âSâwhat happens when ya get too greedy like this.â His knees raise up a bit more to rub your glissading cunt along the very curve of his fat tip. Just dragging your dripping cunt all along his bulging dick, reveling in the sticky schwf! schwf! schwf! of wet fabric. Sukuna gives an impatient tug on the fabric of your pants, âNow get rid of this before I tear that off, too.â
You couldnât shuffle out of your belt and trousers fast enough. And oh, even that wasnât enough for Sukuna - dazedly flinging off what remained of your shirt, your bra, before turning his eyes downwards and-
âOh, good girl.â he whispers at the sight of you in nothing but your flimsy excuse of panties. So soaked -Â translucent, even - your saturated juices making such a glossy mess at your inner thighs. He canât help but flick at the tiny bow on your underwear, leaning up to press a soft kiss to your forehead. âSuch a good girl, arenât ya?â
âK-Kuna-â youâre barely even thinking at this point, panting. âWanâ to feel youââ
Heâs tittering a breathy moan disguised as a laugh at this, bringing up a hand to cup your cheeks. âAwww, my pretty baby wants my cock?â he coos, squeezing in two of his thick fingers between your lips.
But if Sukuna was looking for an answer, then he doesnât wait for it.Â
A spit-glossed pout finds its way to his lips, mocking your own. And fuck, he was such a little tease. One hand giving your ass another slap! just to watch you whine and pretend that it didnât make your pussy even more embarrassingly wet - shit, he was having fun. The other pulling out from inside your mouth, delicate strings of spit snap when heâs gliding his coated digits down, down, down-
âOh-â you tuck your trembly head into the crook of his neck when Sukuna drags his thumb just across your puffed-up pussy lips. Slowly. Tantalizingly.Â
âOh?â he huffs out, licking his lips at just how steamingly wet you were inside. So ready for him. ââOhâ is all?âÂ
Sukuna plants another lingering smack on your ass, and by now youâre sure by now heâs left the bumpy imprint of all five fingers on your flesh. Tracing between your swollen folds gingerly with just the rounded tip of his finger up and down up and down. He gets greedy.Â
âDamn brat-â And itâs all the warning you get before he just forces two of his fat fingers into your messily throbbing pussy. Rubbing all around your tightly quivering entrance, âSâwhat I get for spoiling you too much.â
Thereâs no hiding from the way he stretches you open so obscenely, having your sloppy hole just gaping around his digits. All wet and cozy inside.
âOh- m-more-â you mewl.Â
But he only continues rubbing saturated little circles around your teasing entrance, humming hotly against your lips. âHmm, dunno. Think we hafta teach you some manners, silly girl.â And each of his fingers were so thick, stretching out the channel of your cunt until your mouth watered. Your body was limp, hips stuttering down softly into his hold - trying so uselessly to fuck yourself back down onto him, as if he wasnât easily holding you still with just one beefy arm around your waist. âHow about a âpleaseâ first?â
You scramble to dig your nails into his bulky deltoids, tracing around his circular tattoos peeking out. âP-please!â
âNuh uh-â he snickers. âNo stutterinââ
âPlease!â
Sukuna pretends to think for a few syrupy slow seconds. He nips down softly at the sensitive spots on your neck, having you trembling like a feather in his vice-like grasp. âHow about a âpretty pleaseâ?â
And oh, he grins at the way youâre almost on the verge of tears at this point, your pouty lower lip wobbly with effort. Trying so desperately to comply with the demands of your inmate, you buck your hips so that the soft mountains on his palm graze against your clit. Whimpering, âWh-what if I w-walked away right now, Kuna?â
âMy my, resorting to threats?â heâs whispering filthily in your ear. âNow I know youâre bluffinâ woman. Because I hngh- also know-â So smug when he tugs down the soft cotton of his pants just enough to let his achy cock spring free. âThat youâre gonna stay nâ beg fâme like the good girl you are.â
And you hated that he was right.
You hated that he was so big.Â
Hefty girth slapping up onto his abs with a wet smack! Sukunaâs red, rounded tip was so thick that you could feel your thighs clench, swiping up a glossy glide of precum onto his t-shirt. Drip! Drip! dripping along the crevices of his veins and down to his eager balls, those tufts of pink at his base. All his solid inches winked up at you glisteningly in the harsh cell light. Just waiting. Throbbing.Â
It made your mouth water.Â
So you finally answer, voice strained and breaking at the very end. âI- I wanâ you really badly, Kuna.â He sucks in a breath when you bat your teary lashes up at him, âPretty please?â
âMy good girl.â
At this very moment, the only other response you get is a sensual, slow drag of his fingers out of your cunt. The exact opposite of what you wanted - because, of course, this was Ryomen Sukuna. You whine, clawing desperately at his wrist to try and reel him back.
But he doesnât stop. Canât stop. Almost hypnotized in the way he brings his drenched fingers up into his mouth without a second thought. Sukuna moans at the taste. A glossy trail of your messy slick forms down the corner of his slurping mouth, and he throws his head back with a guttural, âOh fuck- sâsweeter than any of that hah- candy.â
Ah, that did it.Â
Only milliseconds later, youâre being spread all flat on the floor with one swift shove of Sukunaâs big arms, panties sliding easily down your shivering thighs. It really doesnât take much to have your dangling legs splayed out across his sculpted back, his own body shuffling down ravenously to come lips-to-lips with your puffy pussy.
And oh you can feel his smile against your dripping wet cunt, half-lidded eyes boring right up into yours. Long, pinkish tongue lolling out like he was utterly fucked - and if you angled your head just right you could see the way he was deftly spreading both of your swollen folds, the very tip of the hot muscle kissing wetly against your sloppy entrance.
âShiiiit-â your fingers tangle themselves in his rusty pink hair. Hips jittery and bucking up drunkenly against the cool surface to chase his hot mouth. âOh- ngh- Love havinâ your m-mouth on me- ngh-â
âGettinâ all mouthy wâme, huh? Arenât ya embarrassed to be absolutely ruined like this by a criminal like me?â he huffs out a bout of raspy laughter. âSâall because you decided to be a- fuck- a good- girl fâme, thatâs- what.â Struggling to even get out coherent sentences because he didnât want to part from your pretty pussy. Instead kissing all over again and again-
The bulbous metal stud of his tongue piercing thrashes up so filthily against your hot clit, coating the sensitive nub in all of his heady, swelteringly hot saliva.
And the only time youâre registering Sukuna break away just mere inches is to spit. Once. Twice.Â
Thumbing across the stream of see-through spit he just grins up at you in a way you knew to be a pussydrunken expression. Glassy eyes almost drooping shut, tiny dimples cratering at the very ends of his lips, the entire lower half of his face covered in a shiny sheen of slick. Drip! Drip! Drip! right onto the middle of your shamefully spread cunt.Â
âYa got me thinkinâ Iâd wanna live out my entire life sentences jusâ for a taste of this pretty pussy, woman.â
Roughly lapping with his tongue against your clit, each one pulling out crashing waves of white-hot pleasure that make you all but sob when Sukuna unabashedly adds in his fingers past your gummy hole.
âYou can take it-â he hushes out uncharacteristically soothingly into your inner thighs, peppering soft, open-mouthed kisses along them. âTake âem fâme.â
Sukuna isnât shy about immediately dragging his fingers along your sopping wet folds. Starting up a ruthless, simpering pace thrusting inside and out of your drooling entrance has you whining. Â
âOh.â your mouth slack-jaws open deliriously, and for the second time tonight you feel like youâre being absolutely split-apart on his thick fingers. Splaying out a hand to glide across your tummy, âYou- hngh- you already feel s-so deep, Kuna.â
Your words were cracking with a whimper each time heâs delving into your gushing depths. Building you up, wringing you taut with pleasure whenever he picked up the pace. Alternating between harsh sucks on your cunt and the absolute meanest of swipes against the spongy placeholders of your sweet spots.Â
âAlready?â he has the audacity to cackle - cackle right in front of your teary face. âMâbarely even f-fingering this pussy nâ you wanna talk about deep- lemme show ya-â He spares not even the tiniest ounce of mercy when hauling your boneless body even closer. Brows furrowing at the knocking of his chin at the very base of your cunt, the way his jaw grinded. Sukuna replaces the hand on your stomach with his own free one, guiding it up, up, up until your eyes widened and you could feel your breath tightening in your chest.Â
âHere.â Drawing a burning, imaginary line about halfway through - âHere is where my cock sâgonna be so ya better get- better get ready for that, pretty baby.â Looking right in your eyes, Sukunaâs tone is laced with a vicious sort of snarl when he plows on, âBecause my good girl sâgonna be able to take it.â
And youâd heard of the type or orgasms that leave you speechless, that leave you so blindsided that you donât even realize youâre having them.
Because it takes only a few more expert tweaks of Sukunaâs lengthy fingers up against every nook and crevice of your. Scissoring, swirling - round and round until he was dredging up your dizzying orgasm.Â
âOh my god- I think Iâm-â your words are garbling together pathetically, wet and as unsteady as each jolt of electricity running down your spine. âIâm-â
âCumming.â heâs cutting through, tugging you by the thighs even closer to make out impossibly deeper with your convulsing pussy. Rolling his eyes, âI know I know, just shut up nâ cum all over my mouth would ya?â
Itâs not like you could do anything else.Â
And - as a little punishment - your grip tightens searingly on his scalp, just dragging your drooling pussy all over his pretty features. Letting yourself gush all down his tongue in a steady trickle while you ride him to your heartâs content.Â
âHeh- getting so fuckinâ- hngh- fucking greedy, arenât ya?â he mutters out over wet slurps. Still hammering in the pads of his fingers to press up harshly into your bulging sensitive spots. âSâalright. Use me then, use me-âÂ
Your back arches almost painfully, vision tinging with slight black at the edges, and itâs as if you were out of control at this point.Â
âNow now, what do you think youâre doinâ huh?â he feeds into each of your stuttering, slick glides down into his palm while you come down from your high. Eyes narrowing down at you, âAnd here I thought you were turninâ into my- hah- g-good girl. Where are those hands going, huh?â
Shit, you didnât even realize it at first.
Your hands are wandering so sluttily down to where his thickened base was just twitching in his lap. Aching to wrap your trembly fingers wrapping around him - struggling to even close.Â
âOh- oh my god.â your eyes widen after a few sloppy drags of your soft palm down his length. Curving it slightly to the side at the sight of another one of his signature ringed tattoos - right around his fat base. âYou have another tattoo here?â
Sukuna clenches his jaw, hips rutting upwards at a sloppy staccato in synchronization with his hands and yours. âYeah- nâ I already know you love it-â he shudders out, chest panting. â-because I can already feel just how much wetter ya got- shit-â
With all of his almost-inhuman strength, itâs almost too easy for Sukuna to drag your body downwards to his like some silly little ragdoll.Â
âKunaââ youâre dragging out in a breathy tone. Your hands shakily tugging on his t-shirt - your mind finally clear enough to realize that he was still fully clothed while you bare and fucked-out already underneath him. âWanâ this off-â
Smack!
âForgettinâ your place, arenât ya, pretty baby?â he growls, but fuck did Sukuna think you looked so utterly gorgeous like this. All pouty and teary, letting out the cutest whines while you waited for him to do exactly what you said.Â
And, well, he might be the notorious king of curses, the most wanted criminal in all of Japan - but that didnât mean that Sukuna was any match for you.Â
âMâonly listeninâ because you were so f-fuckinâ good fâme hngh- earlier, brat.â he spits out. Hastily ridding himself of both that paper-thin t-shirt and pants - not tearing, you note with slight disgruntlement. Kissing your ass with another smack of his palm for good measure. You wince when he flicks your forehead, âSo ya better not let it get to that pretty lilâ head of yours.â
But fuck, was it so difficult not to.Â
Sukuna was so mouth-wateringly gorgeous, all sculpted muscle and what looked to be miles upon miles of tanned skin that you just wanted to bite into. And you realize - with a jolt - that when those other inmates rumored he had tattoos everywhere - they werenât lying. Thick, circular rings that highlight his bulging biceps, those toned thighs as far as your eye could see.Â
Now you really understood the fan mail.
Smack! Smack! Smack!Â
Those drippingly wet smacks this time didnât come from Sukunaâs hands on your ass - instead, it was from calculated, purposeful little slaps of his thick cock onto your clit.
âHeh, as much as I love to have my- ngh! my cute lilâ officer ogling me-â His hand coming up to curl around your throat, forcing you to peer downwards. â-Iâd rather you look where it r-really matters, silly girl.â
He sounded so proud - barely lucid already at the very sight of your tight, glistening hole kissing up against his fat tip.Â
Dragging a thumb down your wet slit to grin at the size difference even further, he purrs, âYeahâŠthis pussy has been givinâ me a real treat tonight. Might as well give her one back, hm?â
And heâs so big, so full that you canât even whine out anything coherent when Sukuna sinks into your sloppy cunt inch by fucking solid inch. Pushing past that ring of feeble resistance, your pussy was greedily swallowing up every bit of his massive girth. Letting out the cutest squelches that make him moan.Â
âOh- would ya look at that?â he bares his teeth in a devilish smile. Head thrown back at how youâre already clamping and trying to milk him with your velvety walls. âTakinâ me so well, ya really are such a good girl, huh?â
Each and every hoarse little praise is panted raggedly against your ear, and your pussy slides up and down his swollen shaft in a sultry back and forth. And Sukuna just canât tear his eyes away from the way your cunt swallows him up so greedily - so frantically like you were trying to milk something delicious out of him.
âKuna- hngh!â your thighs quiver up and down. Hips moving in slow gyrations against how he was rummaging all inside you. âY-youâre stretching me out so good ah-â
Heâs still trying to squeeze inside, still pushing and pushing. Pressing a hand down on your stomach, âTold you Iâd be right-â Bottoming out. Hard. â-here.â
Each and every juttering ram into your gooey depths have you keening, and his eyes growing even wilder. Grin curling upwards at how every kiss of the very tip of his rotund cock has your spongy cervix bouncing into him, your walls pulsing where he swipes inside. Looking for-
âFuck!â
That.Â
âHeheh- hope ya can take it, brat. Because once I start-â he presses hot peck after peck down your jaw. âI canât stop.â
You learn very quickly that that wasnât a threat - it was a promise.Â
Every plunge into your melty pussy has you almost bawling, because Sukuna wasnât gentle - no, he doesnât even ease you into it. The soft curve of his head presses in so harshly against your bulging g-spot, so thoroughly in rough, wet glides. Each single hammer upwards sinking against wherever drove out the prettiest moans from your pouty lips, having you such a shaky mess underneath of him.Â
Exactly how heâs been wanting you this past year in confinement.
âW-what-â you sputter out, dragging your nails across his neck to mash your lips onto his. Tasting the candy and you and the candy- âThis past year?â
Oh. Shit.Â
âHeheh- did I say that out loud?â Sukuna rumbles, struggling to catch his breath while he swallows back each keened-out whimper threatening to break out from his lips. He gives your tongue a slow, tasteful suck. âWhoops- hah fuuuuck- you see what this pussy does tâme?â
He brings one large hand down to your jittery hips, the other drawing a tender stripe across your still-sensitive clit. That heavenly feeling just makes you clench, and Sukuna to throw his head back with a withering groan. âSâfuckinâ dangerous- youâre more fuckinâ dangerous than me- hah-â
You giggle at the way he was running his mouth now, sentences slurring together like he couldnât even find the words.Â
âYou see this-â he pants, so sensitive that Sukuna canât help but tuck his face into the crook of your neck. And you feel the burning flush of his cheeks, the way he brings your hand up to pat his plush pec, thumping thunderously underneath his heated skin. â-got me fuckinâ crazy here- ngh! Mâon my knees for you nâ youâre all here actinâ like such a good girl.â
As he babbles, Sukuna actually falls back onto his knees.Â
Dragging you right along with him to spearhead his cock vertically into your snug channel, his powerful thighs are thrusting up, up, up-
âOh-â Youâre wrapping your arms tightly around his neck when faced with another stinging smack! And this time he takes the opportunity to roll his fat thumb even deeply against your clit. âSâso-â
Sukunaâs eyes were half-lidded now, grumbling out little profanities into your mouth. âWhat? Canât even speak now?â He chuckles - but it sounds higher-pitched, breathless like he was fucking losing it. âDoesnât- ngh- doesnât matter- this cunt is speakinâ ânough for the both of ya. Why dontcha act like my good girl nâ ask what sheâs sayinâ?â
God, your face burned with such mortification - and itâs all you can do to dart a bleary look towards that smashed CCTV camera once more. Gulping out a breathy, âWh-what is she ah- sayinâ, Kuna?â over those deafening squelch! squelch! squelches.Â
He positively beams, âSheâs sayingâŠâ Nipping down on your lower lip, tasting that familiar strawberry on your tongue. â-that right about now sheâs gonna cum.â
And sure enough, a particularly harsh clashing glide across your g-spot has you sobbing, has you twitching - it has you cumming. Over and over all over Sukunaâs relentless cock, and not just that-
âShit, woman.â Sukuna stares, jaw-dropped in awe at the absolute mess your overwhelmed cunt was gushing out. Coating his erratic thighs in a wet gleam of all your juices, it seeps into his skin, dripping down the curve of his legs and onto the padded floors. âFuckinâ squirted all over me, youâre fuckinâ ah- unreal- fuckââ
If he couldnât maintain that gruff tone of it thatâs because he was genuinely in heaven. Mouth watering, achy cock twitching up into the cushiony sides of your walls once.Â
Before heâs shooting such a sloppy load into your already-messed-up pussy, dumping out thick volumes of seed again and again. It sloshes in all over your insides with every quivering wave of your own orgasm, seeping out from the edges of your sopping slit. Slobbering. Overspilling.Â
Sukuna grunts, feeling you shift gingerly up and down to milk each of his stringy ribbons of cum, leaving sinful dredge after dredge that paints a creamy white ring around his base.Â
âFuckinâ wastinâ it-â heâs jeering, plugging in one of his indexes into your already fully-stuffed entrance. âBetter keep that shit all inside- mânot gonna let my good girl waste it, mâkay?â
âMhm.â you nod, your drowsy body leaning heavily into his. And Sukuna wraps both his strong arms around you to just pin you to his body. âMight jusâ be the best Halloween Iâve ever had-â
âIt fuckinâ better be or so help me-â
SLAM!
âYo, King of Curses~â both of you snap your heads over to the sudden intruder thatâd just crashed the bolted cell door open. He was tall, enveloped by the harsh light from behind - but you could make out those features anywhere. Any guard in this prison could. Throwing over a heavy leather jacket Sukunaâs way, âI tried to wait until your pillowtalk was over but Nanamin can only hold off the bastards on morning shift for so long. So ah chop chop, Suguruâs already waiting for us.â
Gojo Satoru.
Leader of Six Eyes, foe of Ryomen Sukuna.Â
Looking at you like he wanted to positively devour you, âOr, well, if your cute lilâ officerâs coming, too, then we could continue this when we get back to the hideout. Donât you think, sweetheart~â
And Sukuna, oh Sukuna was scowling ever so slightly at the otherâs words - but he only had eyes for you. âSo, whaddaya say, brat?â
---
In the hazy haven of the surveillance room, Nanami lets out a deep shudder. Head thrown back against his leather chair, he takes a few bleary moments to collect his breath.Â
âFuckâŠâ he groans, placing that small handheld camera monitor on the table. A secret one. One that no one working in this prison building - and least of all you - knew about. All of that had been an accident, really - an unintentional part of the plan. But the way that Nanami has to drag his boxers upwards, zipping his uniform pants back up wasnât.Â
Taking a steadying gulp, he throws away that soiled tissue. Fingers punching in a few numbers on his phone, all according to his rehearsed script. âYes, hello?â watching the monitor unwavering. Unsurprised. âWe might have a situation.â
A/N. *BAM* hits you with random plottwist.
Plagiarism not authorized.
#sukuna x reader#sukuna smut#sukuna x you#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk#jjk fic#jujutsu kaisen#gojo x reader#sukuna#tonywrites#sukuna ryomen smut#sukuna ryomen x reader#female reader
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HOUSE IN NEBRASKA â Logan "Worst Wolverine" Howlett x Mutant!Reader AO3 version Spotify Playlist
WORD COUNT â 15.4k SUMMARY â Reader gets roped into saving the timeline with ex-best friend Deadpool, coming face-to-face with a variant of Logan that uproots memories she'd long suppressed, only to find that this version of him lost her in his universe, too. TAGS/WARNINGS â she/her pronouns (minimal usage), female anatomy, flashbacks in italics, angst, enemies to lovers, alcoholism, smoking, arguments, canon typical violence, cursing/bad language, Deadpool breaks the fourth wall like twice, canon behaviour worst wolverine, religious trauma, honda odyssey scene self-insert, eventual smut, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, dirty nasty talk (logan has a filthy mouth), mentions of cocaine literally once. smut is marked after last divider if you want to skip plot but i'll kiss you if you don't!
Youâre smoking a cigarette on your porch when the snowfall happens. It would be normal, you think, if it werenât for the fact that itâs dead in the middle of July. A group of nanas, elbow-deep in the community garden soil, glance up to the sky and begin muttering prayers amongst themselves.
Youâve lived in this safe house for a while now, up in the mid-west of the Appalachian mountains, surrounded by thickets of pine and opposite a bubbling creek. You grew up somewhere near here and the locals welcomed you back with open arms and a plateful of hot food when the humans started the cullingâ when the X-men fell apart.
It has plenty of benefits. The smell of lavender, for one, and your cat, Kevin, loves chasing the pigeons, even if heâs not the most successful hunter. The locally sourced produce means you can avoid the poisoned food theyâre distributing in supermarkets.
But, most importantly, the humans canât find you out here. Youâre lucky the gossip of your⊠genetics, so to speak, doesnât leave Sunday morning church.
Things have been different, lately. The trees are shedding down to dust, people are disappearing at an exponential rate, and there was a time when youâd be on the front lines helping them. Youâre on the edge of your seat waiting for the call â a learned habit â but itâs never coming. Charles is dead. Logan is dead. The X-men are dead.
The snow is warm when it lands on your skin. It feels like rot, and your solitude suddenly feels lonelier and more daunting than ever.
You reach to take a sip of your steaming coffee when you hear movement. A zipping strobe light crosses your vision and you flinch against the intrusion, but youâre not afraid. Youâve surely survived worse.
Stryker worse.
A comical and confused looking figure pops out from an orange portal, scratching the crown of his head over the red and black mask on his face. You sip your coffee as you observe him nonchalantly.
He notices you and approaches with a dainty point of his finger.
âUm, excuse me, maâam.â
âWell, well well,â you suck on your cigarette with a frown. âLook what the cat dragged in. Got a new suit, Red?â
âWhat, arenât you happy to see lilâ old me?â
âYouâre on my property,â you say matter-of-factually. You had a shotgun stowed away inside for emergencies, but frankly, you never had to use it. You were enough of a weapon yourself. Consider it insurance, if the corn-syrup theyâre poisoning ever finally makes it way to you.
You glance sidelong at the old ladies in their aprons, clutching one another with stern gazes in your direction. The deal was that you didnât bring trouble their way â but it looks like trouble found you. You narrow your eyes and silently hope that this doesnât turn messy, as it so usually does where heâs concerned.
He sighs heavily and continues approaching regardless. You analyse his stature and take notes of the weapons on his holsters and back. You reckon you could take him if it came down to it, but he didnât seem threatening.
You and Wade used to be friends, but after isolating yourself from grief, you donât necessarily consider yourselves to have a close relationship. More often than not he brought trouble; hence your defensive response.
âListen, ants in your pants, Iâve done this about a hundred times,â he huffs and places a hand on his hip, waving the device around in his hand. You take another drag of your cigarette and perk your brows before rising to your feet.
âIâve had my spleen shattered by the Hulk, about eighty stab woundsâŠâ
He rambles on about his collection of injuries and you tilt your head with amusement. Must be another one of his famous mental breakdowns. This might be entertaining, at the very least.
ââŠYouâve even killed me a few times in different universes!â He claps his hands together. âAnd frankly, I was just going to let you die here. Youâre not even canon, so you wonât be missed, but you appear to be of use to me. So I need you to come with me. Now. Please.â
What on Earth was he talking about? What on Earth was he ever talking about?
You bark a laugh. âI ainât going anywhere with you, Red and Black.â
âWill it change your mind if I add a cherry on top?â He asks with a dry laugh before nodding enthusiastically. Manically. âYouâre coming. Kevinâs life depends on it.â
âWhat are you talkinâ about? Are you threateninâ my cat? Thatâs a new low, Wade.â
âIs it? Is it really? I am certain that I can go unfathomably lower.â
You roll your eyes, half-way through turning your back on him.
âYou see this?â He holds out a gloved hand and catches some snowflakes. He rubs them between his fingers and they spark and fizzle before dusting away. âThatâs not snow. Thatâs time death. Our universe is dying, womp womp. Stay here, sure! By all means, butââ
Your cat launches out of the door behind you, chirping and meowing to himself before promptly dashing through the portal and disappearing into the blurry void on the other side.
âWell. Looks like he made his choice.â
He sighs and lets you process. You take the final swig of your coffee and huff a breath.
âYou literally have nothing left to lose. Trust me. I know. Iâve seen all kinds of you and, believe me when I say this, even though I love and cherish this version of you, thisââ he points two fingers at you and gestures towards you judgmentally. ââ isnât the best look on you, honey.â
You want to dismiss him. You want to turn him away, to tell him to get lost. Grief swallowed your heroism whole, turning it into a barren wasteland of bitter indifference. You used to be bright, full of light, love, and hope.
Fucking hope. Itâs the reason Logan left you to help Charles in the first place. You just wanted to settle down and disappear, to live a normal life. You lost an intrinsic part of your being when he died; you remember feeling it before you heard the news. Fucking hope.
Hope, hope, hope. Nana Rose chants on about it when she clasps your hands with her wrinkly ones, dragging you to church in spite of your atheism.
âAnd hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts,â she chants, basket of flowers on her hip. âRomans 5:5. Youâd do well to do your readinâ, tulip.â
You didnât and donât ever usually believe a word she says, but you can feel her faith. Itâs solid as steel, pouring out of her like blotting light through the gaps in the trees. Undying. And youâll be damned if you let anything happen to her.
A flicker remains. You imagine what Charles would say to you now, how youâd hang onto his every word and heâd bring out the better of you. You truly do have nothing left to lose, except maybe your cat. Over your dead body.
âCome ooon,â he pokes his fingers together. âFancy being a hero? One last time?â
You take the final drag before stubbing the cigarette out on your railing. âAlright, Red. Iâll bite.â
âThen suit up.â
Your friendship with Deadpool was a rocky one. There was a time you told him youâd be there for him through everything, and you technically owed him one for saving your life that one time even though your ego insists that, to this day, you couldâve taken the fight. Thatâs what heightened cellular control of your body is for, right? Accelerated healing? Empathetic abilities? Faster reactions, enhanced strengthâ you get the point.
Though you didnât realise that returning the favour meant following him through space, time and alternate dimensions, you were a person who stayed true to their word, and you hated being indebted to someone.
So, here you were, waking up in the middle of a barren wasteland that was seconded as a cocktail soup of abandoned universal relics and heroes ripped from their worlds, accompanying your ex-best friend to restore your timeline.
But, one thing about paying someone back, it doesnât technically count if they lie to you about the terms and conditions of the agreement. Only a few mere moments after you come to, dazed by the impact and the blaring wobbly heat of the sun, you rise to watch as Deadpool takes six blades of Wolverine to the chest.
Youâre still a little dizzy when you stagger to your feet, head throbbing, as youâre trying to process if, yes, thatâs exactly what you were witnessing.
âLetâs see you grow your fuckinâ head back!â Wolverine growls.
Deadpool holds his hands up in surrender. âWait, wait, wait! I can fix it! I can fix it!â
The man in yellow hesitates. âFix what?â
âWhatever it is that you did, whatever made you so badââ Wade pants, catching his breath. âThose pricks at the TVA, you heard âem. They have the power to end my universe, but they also have the power to change yours. We get back there, and we can fix your world! Together. I promise.â
You stumble from around a pile of debris, clutching your side as a rib pops back into place. Wolverine sniffs the air, face blanching as he snaps to look in your direction.
When you first make eye contact with him, it feels as though youâre resurfacing from water after being on the precipice of drowning. Your heart leaps into your throat, adrenaline boils your veins and your lungs burst with relief of breathing.
âTroubles always gonna find you, baby,â Logan murmurs, kissing his way up from the pulse in your throat as he rocks against you. âBut so am I.â
Youâve never loved him more, you think, than when he fucks you slow like this. A snowstorm rages outside the cabin, howling full of glass and needles and rattling the window frames. His skin against yours burns a fire within you, warming you to the bone. He sweeps hair away from your face before capturing your mouth in his, swallowing the sounds of your pants, threading his fingers between yours.
You could stay here forever, you think.
Your fingers shake from the whiplash of the memory. You instinctively reach towards him but you catch yourself. This was the husk of him, not your Logan. The realisation feels akin to ripping open a haphazardly sewn wound right down to the fatty yellow flesh, raw and needling and sore.
Heâs broader than you remember. Hair a little darker, wrinkles a little deeper. He smells of alcohol and cigars â that much is familiar. Thatâs him, flesh and adamantium bone, living, breathing. Alive. The physical shell of him prods alive parts of your inner circuitry that you werenât aware had fallen asleep, like intrinsic nerves untangling within you.
You can sense that he knows you, too, based on his emotional response. His noise is extremely loud, spilling out of the cracks of whatever wall he thought heâd successfully built up. This version of Logan certainly had a lot of secrets.
âYou,â he whisper-growls. Itâs almost intangible, leaving him like a breath. He pulls his blades promptly from Deadpoolâs chest and kicks him backwards.
Youâre starting to understand that faith thing that Nana Rose was knocking on about when he strides towards you, large and tall. You certainly werenât a believer by any means but youâre sure youâd be the picture of unbridled worship for the way youâd fall to your knees for him.
Your empathetic power lurches for him, seeking him out as you used to â like a flower to the sun â but it physically recoils from the aura that it touches. It was all your Logan but not in a familiar way. Itâs tainted, dark, and it tastes like copper and screams.
All colour melts from his face and his body shuffles in a way that indicates discomfort; a dry swallow, tense shoulders and flicking eyes that refuse to meet your gaze. He omits feelings of guilt and shame that linger on the tendrils of your empathetic powers where you connect with him.
You try to zone Wade out, squinting as you attempt to navigate through his cobweb of emotions (seriously, this guyâs aura could do with a cleanup) but itâs like wading through black-tar syrup, feelings negated by years of alcohol-abuse and avoidance. Eventually, you feel something that makes your guts twist and your legs shake: a version of romantic attraction and recognition so carnal and raw that you begin to blush, a warmth that creeps its way up from your belly. A breath escapes you like a punch.
âWell. This feels awkward.â Wade glances between you both and places his hands on his hips. âWhy do you both look like youâve seen a ghost? Do I need to call Egon Splegler and tell him to bring his ghost sucky-sucky vacuum? Oh my godââ He slaps his hands to his face and gasps sharply. âCross-Universal lovers?â
As inappropriately timed and tone-deaf his one-liners could be, youâd never been more appreciative of an icebreaker. You think you couldâve stood there for an hour, frozen in silence, staring at a reanimated corpse, basking in the noise of his emotional frequency like an addict finally getting another hit.
But then the noise stops, swallowed up like a heaving black hole had split and atomised the tension whole with its unforgiving jaws. He closes himself off from you. Connection severed. You reach out and feel a cold nothingness similar to how, on particularly rough nights, youâd try to reach out to him after his passing. Youâd clung onto his plaid shirts until the smell and emotional residue wore off of them.
âYou with the mouth? To fix things?â
You nod tightly. You donât think you can find your voice in front of him.
âLetâs just keep moving. And stay out of my head,â Logan grumbles, crossing you with a cold shoulder and mumbling something incoherent under his breath. When heâs made enough distance, you turn to your old friend with a cold glare.
âOoh, brr. Anybody else feel a chill?â
âWade.â
He twists towards you comically slow.
âYou. Motherfucker.â You begin approaching him. He backs up slowly and holds his hands up.
âI knew if I told you the plan you wouldnât have gone along with it!â
âAre you insane? You think multiversally grave-robbing my fucking dead ex-boyfriend is going to save our timelines?!â You yell.
âTechnically heâs not deadââ
You push him. âHe should be! He- he wasâ he is!â
âWell, this one isnât!â He pushes back. âAnd Iâm not sorry for finding a loophole in the plan to fry â not just mine, mind you â but both of our timelines! Did you happen to forget that? No multi-dimensional depressed Logan? Alright then! No more Kevin!â
Heâs talking about your cat. Anger flares.
âDonât you dare bring Kevin into this.â
âYou forced my hand!â He yells, mouth moving alien-like behind the mask on his face. âBesides, Iâm not doing this for meââ
You blink your eyes closed. You might reach the end of your tether if he said her name one more time. Youâve been in his company for approximately an hour, and heâs already drilled a hole into your brain with his incessant yapping about the âlove of his lifeâ.
âWade, you need to move on. She clearly has.â
âI will not move on from the only people I love in this fucked up dimension. This isnât just for Vanessa.â He shoves a glossy photograph in your face. âThis is for you and blind Al and even that shit-head teenager and her pinkie-pie girlfriend! They deserve their timeline!â
âI literally donât care about any of those people!â
Even yourself?
âWell, I do! I have people I care about! Arenât you supposed to be a hero? God, all of you X-men are so depressing. Is it the suits they make you wear? Is that it? Canât breathe in that thing?â He continues poking at you. âLoosen up a little!â
You straighten your posture and the black leather of your suit crackles. You swat his hands away as he continues poking. âAlright! Cut it out!â
âThink of Nana Rose.â He draws a heart with two fingers. âLittle old ladies like her deserve a chance, donât they?â
And even though humans had done nothing but wage war on your kind for simply existing, you still felt obliged to help them. Besides, the thought of other mutants â kid mutants â dying when you hold the chance to save them in the palm of your hand? You were hardly managing as you were now. Youâre not sure youâd be able to live with yourself if you kept going like this.
âAlright, alright!â You huff, heart pounding in your chest. You look over at where Wolverine kicks at rocks in the distance. âFucking hell, Red. Holy fuck.â
You say it again, only this time you scream it into your hands.
âYou shouldâve warned me.â
âAre we good?â
âAre we goââ You scoff. You kick his ankle, feel the bones shatter and crunch beneath your foot. He lets out a short, high-pitched yelp. âYou deserved that.â
âMotherfuckermotherfucker⊠oh youâre lucky I feel bad about lying to you or I wouldâve twisted your milk bags off for that I swear to God.â He sucks in a breath. âIâll allow it. Just this once.â
âMhm,â you murmur, walking forward. âThat doesnât sound like an apology.â
He limps after you, floppy ankle dragging a line in the sandy dirt. âIâll be dead before you ever get one of those out of me! And too bad I canât fucking die!â
The difference between this Logan and your Logan is stark, minus the uncanny resemblance. Your Logan was soft and gentle, but this version is sharper and blade-edged, and your fingers bleed when you try to touch him.
Staring at him feels like throwing up a mirror and analysing yourself, a picture of what happens to a person when they make all of the wrong choices. Youâre embarrassed, almost. This isnât a version of you that you ever want him to know, but at least you can say youâre trying.
Him, on the other handâŠ
âAre we going to keep up the awkward silence?â You snip, awkwardly adjusting the restraints on your wrist.
Youâve been in Loganâs company for all of an hour, and yet accompanying one another through literal time purgatory didnât seem to irk any feelings of obligation from his end. Heâd been cold-shouldering and ignoring you the entire time, even though you kept catching him staring.
âI have nothing to say to you,â he spits, wriggling uncomfortably against a very unconscious Deadpool. âYou got us into this mess.â
You frown, small. You can feel hatred pouring out from him, leaving a sickly bile taste in the back of your throat. Youâve lived through enough hate for being a mutant in your lifetime, enough that youâd become accustomed to tuning it out of your radio channel, so to speak, but something about it coming from the man you loved makes it a little harder to swallow.
Youâre quiet when you next speak. âDonât make this more difficult than it has to be.â
He shoots you an indistinguishable look and grunts to himself. Such a Libra.
âSo, whatâs the story here?â Johnny asks with a sly grin. He turns to you with a glimmer of mischief in his eye. âYou two know each other?â
You cringe. âSort of. Last I remember, he wasnât this much of a prick.â
âOh, trouble in paradise, huh?â His grin grows. âThatâs a shame. Not often we get girls like you in the void.â
âSeriously?â You say with a side-eye.
He shrugs, all blue-spandex biceps and charming smile. âNo harm in trying.â
Your breath hitches as Cassandra approaches, wide eyes and tilted head aiming for you purposefully. Logan swiftly angles his body so that heâs standing in front of you and she halts as a delighted, implicating smile stretches across her face. Your chest constricts, tendrils of yearning coiling tighter. It appeared to be muscle memory: his instinctual, protective flinch. Just like your Logan used to, despite how capable he knew you were.
âNow, Iâve always wanted a Wolverine.â Her finger moves along the crowd. âKnew Iâd get one eventually. But I never even dreamed of having you.â
Cassandra zips behind you and her slender fingers delve into the crevices and valleys of your brain, lips intimately close to your neck and ear. Wolverine snarls territoriality, but heâs unable to move. The urge to reach for him is overwhelming.
âDo you know that there are so few universes where you exist?â She whispers, caressing your deepest memories. âI even asked the TVA about you, in exchange for keeping the peace. I was disheartened when I found out one of you died. But youâre here! Now, I donât believe in fate, but this almost feels like it was meant to be.â
You flinch when she uncovers a particularly fond memory, one you hadnât been aware was so prominently in the forefront.
In the back of his truck, a cigar between his teeth, hands sliding under your shirt. In another world, he wouldâve taken the time to do this properly, but living in a school didnât exactly grant two consenting adults any privacy.
âWaited long enough for this.â
He kisses up from your bare foot to the sensitive skin of your inner knee, lips scorching against your skin.
âLoganâŠâ
âEasy,â he murmurs, leaning away for a moment to remove his plaid overshirt, leaving himself in that white vest you could eat him alive in. âStill wanna take my time with you.â
Youâre desperate, he can tellâ can probably smell it, too, but youâre far too humiliated to ask him if he can.
Logan wasnât your first by any means, but with the way you were near trembling for him truly felt like youâd be losing all of your innocence in the back seat. Youâre shy and quiet, everything he isnât. Youâre infatuated with him â have been since he burst out of the lab in his grey hoodie â and have daydreamed about what it would be like to have him. You certainly didnât let him know that right away, and with whatever shred of composure remained around his relentless flirting and teasing remarks, you tried to play hard to get.
Until you couldnât. Because you werenât. He had you, and with every fibre of your being, you wanted him to.
She pulls her hands from your brain with a shlick sound, rubbing her fingers together as if relishing in the produce of your memories. She grabs a rag from her pocket and smirks knowingly.
âYouâre thinking of that at a time like this?â She laughs all witch-like. âWorry not; your secretâs safe with me, naughty girl.â
Wade lowers his voice and leans towards Logan. âShe was thinking of me.â
âI can read between the lines, darling,â she potters on. âThis isnât about a sexual fantasy. Deep down, you just want to be wanted. To be loved.â
She steps back and extends her arms. âAfter all, youâll never amount to anything in your world. Itâs such a shame that your Logan left you so abruptly. Did he break your heart?â She giggles. âWhy suppress your powers in his name? For a level-five mutant, you certainly donât act like one. You can do that, here. Freely!â
Your worn thin tether creaks with exhaustion like a dilapidated bridge under pressure. There isnât a singular fibre of your being that desires to be stuck here, but the small, angry teenage voice in your head would love nothing more than to just let go. Youâd been containing your powers for as far as you can remember, and they'd always been as irresistible as the promise of Pandora's box.
But you know how that story ends.
You take a momentâs pause. âI have no interest in livinâ in a garbage dump.â
She tilts her head and neatly clasps her hands behind her back. âDo you forget where you come from? I think we both know who lives in a garbage dump.â
âYou motherfââ
Youâd just managed to escape Cassandraâs lair with Aliothâs foggy storm fangs nipping at your ankles when you ran across the abandoned diner.
Youâre ravenous, wrist aching from how you dig at the freezer-burned ice cream. Itâs your least favourite flavour but youâve been running on fumes for the past day or so, so youâll take what you can get, though you begin to lose your appetite when you remember Johnny, and how Cassandra had zipped the skin from him like popping a blood-filled water balloon.
Something is rumbling beneath your surface. A distinct, constant buzzing, like two atoms slowly building up radioactive energy. Youâd asked for none of this, and would certainly give Wade a talking to when the time called for it, but, for now, youâre trying your hardest to make this as easy a process as possible.
Your male counterpart, however, was doing exactly what men generally do. He was making this fucking unbearable.
Logan sits across from you, brooding, fingers gripping the medicinal bottle as if itâs anywhere near appropriate to be drinking. He throws you a particularly lingering glare when he notices you staring, but refuses to maintain eye contact when you look back at him
You toss the tub and spoon across the table with a sharp clatter, your patience collapsing.
âWhat? Canât even look at me?â You snap. His eyes look exhausted when they finally meet yours. Wade, being the characteristic little fucker he is, pulls a delighted, shit-stirring grin as he glances between the two of you as if watching a tennis match.
Logan gasps as he finishes taking a drink. âNot much to look at,â he says, wiping the back of his mouth.
The words twist like a fist in your gut. For a moment, youâre rendered too stunned to respond, like heâd tossed a flash-bang toward you. His casual cruelty digs deeper than you care to admitâ but youâve had far too much therapy, too much psychological training, to know heâs deflecting.
But you wouldnât doubt for a second that there was a more beautiful version of you somewhere.
âWhat, you comparinâ me to someone?â You ask. You can tell youâve struck a nerve by the way he goes for another sip. âThat it?â
He grimaces.
âDo I make you feel sick? Am I making you feel sick?â
He stares at you hard, but silently. He takes a long swig of the rubbing alcohol and you cringe as his throat bobs. His silence and feigned indifference light a fire of indignation.
âYou know, youâre not the only person whoâs suffered. Whoâs lost people.â
He laughs like what youâre saying is funny. âYeah, right, bub, you have got no idea what loss is.â
âOh, you are such a fucking cunt,â you spit, slamming your hands on the table as you rise to your feet. âYou know what, Wade? Youâre right. I canât do this. So fuck you and fuck his timeline and fuck every timeline that had anything to do with it! Iâm done.â
A wave of uncontrolled psionic energy born from your anger blasts from you upon your final words, slamming them back into their seats and sending the cutlery, nearby debris and weapons flying. The neighbouring windows smash, shattering explosively and sprinkling outside of the diner.
The simmering stops, replaced by a stifling emptiness.
âI wasnât finished with that!â Wade cries, crouching down to scoop up what remains of the gelatinous spam.
You pause for a moment, glance at your hands, and then grab your jacket in an aggressive fit.
Wade whines your name, halfway through gagging down a forkful of cold spam off of the floor (one of which resonates with a particularly distinct crunch, but you donât stay to find out whether or not he just truly ate glass), and he doesnât attempt to get up and follow you as you storm off.
You take a heaving breath of hot desert air when you leave the diner. The sandy breeze tousles your hair, and with the prickly energy of an incoming nervous breakdown, your legs kick and youâre running.
âStryker got you, too?â Logan asks, eyebrows flicking up.
You donât look him in the eye when you nod. You cross your arms and slouch a little, caging your heart in. Stryker â the ex-militant with a fetish for experimenting on mutants â had held you captive for several years. Heâd brainwashed you into using your empathetic abilities for nefarious purposes, like seducing other mutants, and sometimes important political and militant figures.
âYou like me?â He questions, quieter this time.
âNo⊠no, not like you,â you reply. âI donât have the fancy bones. I heal fast, but I wouldnât survive that kinda procedure.â
âAh.â
âI donât remember everything. Just bits and pieces. Feelings, mostly. Nightmares,â you explain. He nods understandingly. âIâm always on edge.â
âYou always seem so calm,â he observes. âNothing seems to phase you.â
âI have to be. It took a lot of pain and damage to get this level-headed,â you respond quickly. âIf I donât manage my emotions, all the emotions that I receive, touchâ it all comes out. Explosively. It has to come out somehow. I could hurt people.â
âFunny. School therapist ânâ youâve got the most issues,â he teases light-heartedly.
âYou got no idea, lumberjack.â
You hated killing.
Youâre on your knees, arms and hands and chest soaked crimson, sobbing. Theyâd come out of nowhere, the raiders, and they were hungry for something you couldnât quite put your finger on. All you know is that you felt their need, their desperation, their willingness to do anything to get it.
The flash of harrowing horror someone feels before they die isnât a unique experience. It simply varies in strength â sometimes itâs a feather-like touch that careens over you, a shuddering realisation that theyâre taking their last breath, and sometimes itâs like a crack of lightning. Bloodied hands gripping your biceps with fear in a final attempt to survive. Theyâd rather cling to you than die alone.
You hate killing. Especially this up close.
You donât cry for them. You donât even cry for yourself. Itâs a small emotional space where they cry vicariously through you.
You were black-out when it happened, you tell yourself, and suddenly regress to the student you used to be, sobbing on your knees in front of Charles as he tries to teach you serenity and control after an outburst had caused you to kill a nest of birds. Heâd done it for Magneto, he saidâ so he could certainly do it for you.
You should have meditated more.
The sound of a car gurgles somewhere behind you, but you havenât the energy to look or use your powers to seek out whoâs approaching and what their intent is. Youâre exhausted enough that whatever they wish to do with you â turn you to processed dog kibble, send you back into the jaws of Cassandraâs lair, kill you â whatever. Just let it happen.
A slamming car door and then the crunching of boots on gravel.
âYouâre easy to track.â A pause. âYou look pathetic. You done throwing your tantrum?â
Logan. Of course, itâs him.
âLeave me alone, prick.â
âAs much as Iâd like to, you and the Mouth still have to hold up your end of the bargain,â he quips, folding his arms across his broad chest. âNow get up.â
You glare up at him and his arms unfurl as he notices your tear-streaked face. His expression drops, softens, before it quickly ticks back up into an incredulous, irritated look.
âAre you crying?â He asks with a scoff. He pauses before dragging his hand down his face and rubbing his scruffy jaw. âJesus Christ. Get up. Get in the car.â
âI ainât fuckinâ around, Logan. Piss. Off.â
He mumbles a string of incoherent curses and turns on his heel. You think, for a moment and a breath of relief, that heâs truly going to give up on you and leave. He could finish this without you. Itâs easier this way.
Instead, a thick bicep wraps around your middle and youâre flung over his shoulder with a yelp.
âQuit your squirminâ.â
âThen put me down!â You yell, thrashing in his grasp. He promptly ignores you, unphased by the jabs you strike at his back. You quickly unsheath the small knife from your jacket sleeve, winding up your arm before you drive it into the muscly pocket by his kidneys.
âOw! Cheap shot, you little fucker!â
Wade sighs and clutches his hands in front of his chest romantically. âOh, the newlyweds.â
Logan dumps you into the front seat of the car carelessly, grumbling something as he slams the door shut and applies the child locks. Petty motherfucker.
You rub the sore spot on your tailbone where you landed on a seat buckle funny. You want to bite your tongue but youâre flared up.
âWe should switch places. Iâm a better driver than you are.â
Logan doesnât bother looking at you as he starts up the ignition. âJust shut up.â
âYou can go on ahead and smoke a cat turd in hell, then.â
âSo fuckinâ immature. Grow up.â
âMom and Dad can you please stop fighting!â Deadpool cries out from the backseats.
You just roll your eyes, resigning into your chair and folding your arms.
At some point along the ride, Wade falls asleep, snoring soundly to himself. Youâre silent in the front, drumming a beat on your knees, awkwardly thinking of something to say. You have the impulsive need to fill the silence, even if you were trapped in a crappy car with a man who had made it vehemently clear that he irrevocably hated you.
âSo, if they can fix your world, whatâs the first thing youâll do?â
Logan rips his eyes towards you. âWhat did you say?â
âI said when you get back, whatâs the first thingââ
âNo, no, noâ before that.â
You hesitate, wondering if youâd landed yourself in a trap based on the sharpness of his tone and the way that anger crackles off of him like static lightning.
âIf⊠they can fix your world?â
He slams his foot on the brake and you just about catch yourself before your nose goes flying into the dashboard. Wade is thrust out of the front window, smashing through and promptly falling unconscious underneath a tree, neck broken at an awkward angle.
Your eyes widen.
âWhat do you mean: if?â
âThatâs what Wade saidââ
âI donât give a fuck who said what. He promised me he would fix thingsââ
âWell, I didnât promise you shit!â
He laughs, low and devoid of humour. âYou donât have a clue if they can fix things, do you?â
Well, no. Youâve been operating on a hunch the entire time and had half come to accept that you might be stuck in the TVA void forever. Who knows how much time has passed elsewhere?
Regardless of the fact you truly had nothing to do with whatever came out of Wadeâs mouth, you werenât about to let Mr. Worst Wolverine shit all over him and his plan to save his friends.
âIs it really that far-fetched? We made an educated wish!â
Something dark flashes across his face. You can feel hate pulsing off of him in dizzying waves, doubling with each passing moment.
âYou made⊠an educated fucking wish?â
âWhatâs your problem with me, huh? Got a stick up your ass?â You reach for the car door handle, but he snaps up your wrist, holding it high. âYou better let go of me right now, old manââ
âOr what, huh? Gonna run away again?â He threatens.
âYou geriatric, alcoholic motherfucker. Iâve done nothinâ but try and be civil with you and you treat me like Iâm the one who ruined your life! I donât know what version of me you knew but you need to stop actinâ like I ainât worthy of being here because of what you did!â
âListen, Iâll tell you what my problem is with youââ he leans closer, eyes roving over you with a disgusted look on his face. âI mean, you are a ridiculous, emotional, immature crybaby. I have never met a sadder, more attention-seeking, foul-mouthed little bitch in my entire life and that says a lot because Iâve been alive for more than two hundred fuckinâ years.â
âAnd Iâll tell you, that bald chick was right about one thing: you will never amount to anything. Youâll never save the world. You couldnât even save a relationship with me. Iâd say you shouldâve died alone but itâs one of Godâs best jokes that in this universe you didnât seem to fuckinâ die, except that ones on the rest of all of us!â
He breathes heavily when his rant finishes. Youâre taken aback, jaw slack, eyes warm with the onset of tears born from shock.
âWhat, you got nothinâ to say, empath?â
You suck in a deep breath, blinking slowly as you flick the emotional switch off in your head.
âIâm going to hurt you now.â
He snorts. âOh, are you?â
In a swift manoeuvre, you raise your slap him around the face. You knew better than to punch a metal skull, but you still wanted him to sting. His eyes slit, nostrils flaring in challenge.
âThat all you got?â
âNot even close,â you snap back, knuckles whitening from the way you curl your fingers into your palm. âYou want to play this game, Logan? Fineâ but Iâm not gonna sit here and keep on provinâ myself to you. Iâve had enough of your Christ-born-again superiority complex. Did you forget that youâre the worst Wolverine?â
âOh, yeah? Well, at least Iâm honest about who I am. Look at youâ youâre a fuckinâ joke, pretending to be some hero in a suit made for a dead team,â he barks back, voice rising with each word. âI donât need your bullshit âwishesââ you should know, Iâve buried people for less.â
âYeah, because youâre so perfect, ainât that right?â You yell, voice cracking from the power of your anger. âThe almighty Wolverineâ the unkillable bastard who canât seem to hold onto anythinâ good in his life! Youâve had centuries to get your shit together, and look at youââ You look him up and down with disgust. ââstill just a bitter, lonely, broken man, takinâ it out on everyone else and a goddamn bottle.â
His eyes narrow, muscles in his jaw twitching as he appears to fight and keep his temper in check, but thereâs an obvious crack forming, the dam of his unbridled rage near overflowing.
âYou think you know me, huh?â He murmurs, voice a deadly whisper, the calm before the storm. âYou donât know a goddamn thing about what Iâve been through. Youâre nothing but a lost woman playing make-believe and hiding in the shadow of a fuckinâ merc. Youâre pathetic.â
Something inside of you breaks. âIâm pathetic? Look at yourself! Youâre so goddamn desperate to feel anythinâ that youâll lash out at everyone around you for some semblance of warmth. Thereâs a fine line between hate and love, after all! You think youâre so strong because you can heal, because youâve lived forever? Yeah, rightâ youâre the weakest, most cowardly man Iâve met in a loong time.â
The blades between his knuckles shoot out with a shink! For a moment, you think that heâs going to attack you. Hellâ you even hope that he will, just to diminish some of the unbearable, stifling tension. Instead, the blades retract with a deep breath, and he grabs you forcefully by the collar of your suit, yanking you so close that you can feel the heat of his breath on your face.
His voice is low and rough, each word dripping with venom. âGo on, keep psychoanalysing me. You wanna talk about cowardice? How about leaving people who need you, just because itâs easier to run? Better yet, how about the fact that you abandoned the X-men to hide away in the mountains, huh?â
Your eyes widen with recognition.
âYeah⊠Wadeâs got a big mouth. Told me everythinâ. Youâre no hero. Hell, youâre just a selfish, reckless hillbilly who failed at pretending to be human.â
Your heart palpitates in your chest, each word coiling and slicing like blades in your intestines, but you refuse to let him see how much it hurts. Instead, your lips curl into a cold, bitter smile, one that doesnât quite reach your eyes.
âAnd youâre just a sad, angry old man who canât handle the fact that heâs lost everythinâ. Go ahead: keep pushing people away! Keep hidinâ behind that anger oâ yours! Itâs got you this far, ainât it?! Iâve treated kids with trauma worth double yours and they were nothinâ but kind and selfless. I wonât let you project your failures onto me. Iâm done with this.â
âYeah, why donât you walk away!â
The argument reaches a fever pitch, tension sizzling in the air between you. Youâre so close, glaring at each other with so much anger, so much resonating heat, that it feels like somethingâs going to break. And then, suddenly, it does.
Before either of you can think, you close the gap between you, lips crashing against his. Itâs not gentle, itâs not softâ the kiss is rough, violent, a clash of lips and fury. His grip on your collar tightens, and for a moment, youâre both frozen, caught in the shock of whatâs happening.
But then something more fiery in nature than anger ignites, and he kisses you back just as fiercely, and maybe a little more desperateâ like heâs trying to pour out all of his pain and resentment, into this one moment. Your tongues slide against each other and his teeth catch against yours as he groans into your mouth. Your hands thread through his hair, yanking him closer as if trying to hold onto something real and tangible in the chaos of the kiss, reeling from the sudden spinning in your head. Itâs angry, raw, filled with all the things youâre not capable of verbalising: grief, love, yearning, reconciliation.
The result of a painful reunion.
The world falls away and all thatâs left is the taste of him, the feel of his lips against yours, rough and demanding. You hate him right nowâ hate him so much that you canât help but want him. The sheer intensity of it all overwhelms you and makes your fingers shake against the nape of his neck, but you canât pull awayâ not now, not when youâve tasted the wine. Youâre too far gone, caught up in the storm of his intoxication, fantasising about ripping that yellow and blue suit off of him and riding him until thereâs nothing left for him to regenerate.
And then, just as suddenly as it started, the bubble of the moment bursts with the sound of slow clapping coming from outside the car. You jerk back from Logan, breath coming in ragged gasps. Logan is equally as stunned, still tight-gripping your collar as if he doesnât know what else to do with his hands.
You both see Wade sitting up, hands together, eyes wide as saucers as he takes in the scene.
âWhoa, whoa, whoa. Did I just wake up in a telenovela?â His voice is laced with amusement. âI mean, I know you two clearly had some unresolved sexual tensionâ but this? Oh, this is gold. Please donât stop on my account, just let me get the camcorder first!â
Youâre too stun-locked to respond, lips parting and closing as your brain scrambles to formulate a response as youâre still reeling from what just happened. Logan (for once) seems equally as lost for words, his typical scowl replaced with a look of confusion.
âShut up, Mouth,â Logan barks, but thereâs no real heat behind it. There canât be, really, not when youâve both been caught red-handed. He releases your collar at once.
Wade, however, is having none of it. âOh, no, no, no! You donât just get to brush this off like itâs nothing! That was a full-on makeout session! I only interrupted because I thought you were about to rip each otherâs clothes off.â He sighs wistfully and crosses his legs. âHere I was thinking that you two hated each otherâ but I guess all that anger was just foreplay, huh?â
Your face burns with a mixture of shame and something else youâre not quite ready to admit. âWadeâ cut it out.â
He grins, not deterred in the least. âOh, but Iâm loving this. All that pent-up aggression finally coming to fruition. Itâs beautiful, truly.â
Logan shoots him a look that could melt iron, but Wade just simply shrugs, unfazed. âHey, Iâm just saying what everyoneâs thinking. Everyone being me.â
âWade,â you warn through gritted teeth.
âWell, unless you want me to watch (which I am not opposed to, by the way) maybe next time the two of you should get a room,â he tilts his head. âOr, you know, a couples therapist.â
He then turns to address Logan directly.
âAnd I mustâve missed the AO3 tags because I did not peg you for the enemies-to-lovers type, Mister. Who knew all it took was a bit of hate-kissing to get the sparks flying? Donât look so ashamed! Iâm just jealous I didnât get to you first.â
He stumbles towards the car and collapses into the back seat. âNext time you wanna bump uglies, just ask for some privacy! You can save me the broken neck!â He gets himself comfortable, man-spreading and laying his hands on both of your shoulders as you stare dead-forwards, unable to look at each other.
âGosh, youâre both so tense.â He begins massaging. âLookâ props to you both for not letting all that angst go to waste. This is a safe space, and thereâs no shame in a little hormone-inducedââ
âOh, for Godâs sake,â Logan interrupts, revving the car back to life and shoving his prodding hands away. âJust be quiet back there.â
âFine, fine. Iâll keep the commentary to myself. But just so you knowâ got that bad boy playing on repeat, right here.â He says, tapping the side of his head.
You bury your face in your hands. This was going to be a long car ride.
As the car starts moving again, you muster the bravery to risk a glance at Logan. His expression is hard to read but his energy thrums with uncertainty. The boiling hatred seems to have dialled down to a gentle simmer, mostly redirected towards himself rather than you. Thereâs something elseâ something that wasnât there before. You rip your eyes away quickly, mind racing.
For somebody so in tune with emotions and the literal ability to manipulate them if you so desired, you were horrendous at navigating your own. You donât know what this kiss meant, or if it even meant anything at all.
If thereâs anyone you didnât expect to come across in the void, itâs X-23â Laura. Sheâs taller, now, with hair down her back, but sheâs still got that stern, mean look on her face that intimidated you the first time you met her.
The weak front door squeaks when you open it a crack. A girl, maybe in her small teen years, blinks up at you.
âCan I help you?â You ask, wiping your flour-dusty hands down on the front of your cooking apron.
âAre youââ she says your name.
You attempt to swing the door shut, but she jams it with her boot. You flick your eyes up, glance around for any signs of threats, and then lower your gaze to her. You wrap your cardigan around your mid-section.
âI donât go by that name anymore. Who the Hell are you, kid, and what do you want?â
âIâm here about Logan,â she says, matter-of-factly.
Logan. A name followed by your own, both of which you hadnât heard in years.
âHeâs not here, kid. He died years ago.â
âI know,â she answers, unwavering. âI was there when it happened. Your name was the last thing he said.â
Youâd let her in for a glass of sugary sweet tea that day, but once stories were exchanged you told her not to come back. She respected your wishesâ she said she simply wanted to put a name to the face, to get closure, but youâd felt her desperation. Perhaps she was seeking out respite, or family, but you were in no position to be sharing your space with someone who could put another target on your back.
After introductions were made with the others who had been ripped from their timelines (Elektra, Blade and oh my god a Gambit variant with muscles so huge he could pop your head between his biceps) you excused yourself to sit outside. The buzzing emotional energy made your collar feel a little tight around the neck, your head a little fuzzy with noise, so you decided to reignite the small campfire a few yards away from the safe-house and rest there, instead.
You hadnât realised you were being followed.
âItâs not safe here.â
âItâs not safe anywhere, Logan.â
He looks defeated, raising and clasping his hands behind his head.
âI gotta leave, baby.â
âIf you leave, I ainât lettinâ you back,â you whisper. âYou donât heal the same anymore, Logan, and you promised meââ
âI know what I promised,â he rebuts, but not angrily. You can already see on his face that heâs made his choice. Heâs not coming to you to discuss it. âBut I owe it to him. To Charles. He gave me everything.â
âSo then what did I give you?â You ask. âNot a home, not my love, not everything?â You slam the tea towel down and turn away from him as the tears form. Heâs quiet, perhaps processing everything, but youâre too impatient.
âIf youâre just gonâ get up and leave, do it now. I wonât beg you to stay, Jimmy.â
âI love you.â
You donât say it back.
You wake up with a start, damp clinging to your forehead. You immediately sense another presence and glance over to see Logan watching you with a steady gaze. His expression is soft and almost reverent at first, but his facade hardens with a quick tick of his jaw.
âYou talk in your sleep.â The bottle in his hand sloshes as he takes a drink. âNightmare?â
You sigh frustratedly when you realise itâs him. Of course, itâs him â his energy reeks of whiskey and self-loathing. You prop yourself on your elbows, massaging the sore spots on your temples where sleep fog forms.
âI canât even get some rest without you botherinâ me? Youâre leakinâ self-hatred everywhere.â
âQuit hogging the fire then.â
âFuck you,â you murmur, but itâs without bite.
A moment passes before he fills the silence again. âWhat are you even doing out here, alone? Trying to get yourself killed? Pretty stupid.â
âDo you know how hard it is to sleep when nobody shuts up?â
His brows knit. âTheyâre all dead asleep.â
His hand runs up and down your back.
âCanât settle?â He asks after you sigh.
âNo.â You turn so youâre lying on your back, shoulder touching his, staring up at the ceiling. âEveryone is feeling so loud. Itâs like a frequency I canât turn off.â
He hums. âTheyâre grieving, I sâpose.â
âEven you and you always said you hated the guy.â You shuffle to lie on your side, facing him. You place a hand on his bare chest. âI can feel it, you know.â
âI didnât hate Scott. Just found him⊠obnoxiously irritating.â
âTough guy.â You giggle and stroke his cheek. âYouâre turninâ soft, old man.â
He pulls you flush against him and presses a kiss to your hairline. You lay in verbal silence for a while, soaking up his presence (god, you were so in love), but youâre interrupted when he abruptly sits up and grabs the white vest he discarded somewhere near the bed.
You lean on your elbows. âWhere you goinâ?â
âLetâs go for a ride.â
âWhat?â
âYou canât sleep here. Letâs go somewhere quieter.â
âBut Charles saidââ
âScrew Charles. You cominâ or what?â
He hadnât told you he loved you yet, but at that moment you felt it.
And so you do, clinging to his mid-section on his motorcycle, head stuffed into the helmet he affectionately forces you to wear. Itâs a warm night in New York, soupy with heat, but the further you get away from the compound with him by your side the more you feel you can breathe.
ââCourse, you donât understand.â
You reach for the small pouch on your hip and retrieve a cigarette. You light it between your lips, taking a seat a few paces away from him, hands still shaking a little with the aftershocks of the night terror.
âSince when did you start smoking?â
You perk a brow. âIâve always smoked.â
He seems to realise something and simply shakes his head before returning to the vice in his fist.
âRight.â
You stare at him for a long, passing moment, before pulling out your lighter again and offering it towards him. He perks a brow.
âI know you got a cigar in there somewhere,â you say. He pauses, sighs, and then retrieves a thick cigar from one of the pouches on his suit. You lean closer, flick the lighter, and cup your hand to protect it from the breeze, shamelessly glancing at the dancing glow that bathes his face amid the firelight. You feel the urge to kiss him again, and when his eyes flick up to yours, you think for the briefest second that he wants to kiss you, too.
Swallowing, you collapse your lighter and clear your throat. You sit quietly, smoking and drinking in a silence only negated by the distant sound of chittering bugs around you. Once youâre finished with your cigarette, you toss the butt into the fire.
âWeâre infiltrating tomorrow morning.â
He laughs dryly. âYeah, good luck with that.â
Your lips tighten into a thin line. âWe wonât make it without you.â
âSure you will. Iâm not him, you know,â Wolverine grumbles, slugging another shot of alcohol.
You scrutinise him from across the log. You wonder if he feels as pathetic as he looks.
âNoâ you got that right,â you answer. You pry the liquor from his hands but the grip he releases from the neck of the bottle must have been a mercy on his part because you knew he was extraordinarily stronger than you. âHe was much braver than you.â
His eyes flicker from the flames to you as you take a long swig.
âAlthough probably just as stupid.â
A pause. Crackling and popping firewood fills the silence.
âBut, he was a hero. And so are you.â
A beat before he spits a dry laugh, âwhat gave you that idea?â
You give him a once over and offer a half-smile. âThat suit, for starters.â
He looks down at himself like heâd forgotten he was wearing it and wipes away a stray speck of blood from the bright material that youâre sure you might be responsible for.
âWhat, you like it?â He grunts.
You canât help but smile. âYellow suits you.â
âThis is all I had left to remember youâ them by,â he says, tone turning more sombre as he reminisces.
You decide itâs not the time to make another jab, so, instead, you play back and forth with the bottle for a while until the alcohol stops stinging your throat.
Something small shatters inside of you when you watch him muster the strength to look into your eyes, and his look a little glassy.
âDid you love him?â
Woof, that needed a healthy drink of courage to answer. When you hold his gaze, thereâs a hollowness to his expressionâ an unasked question. Was there truly a version of him worth loving?
âYeah.â You wipe the back of your hand across your mouth to cover the crack in your voice. âYeah, I did.â
Heâd insisted he hadnât wanted you around yet heâd kissed you and now followed you to where youâd been sleeping. That had to count for something, so you extend your arm and gesture the bottle towards himâ an olive branch in the form of shitty Jack Daniels. Your fingers touch when he accepts it and the brief glimmer of eye contact you share sends shivery energy zipping between you.
âI loved him,â you repeat, as if convincing yourself. A repeated balm to soothe the pain of letting him leave.
âHeâs an idiot for leaving you.â
You bite back a sob-laugh, imagination caught somewhere between wondering who youâd rather beat up more: him, or yourself.
âMaybe Iâm an idiot for not followinâ him.â You sniff deeply to push back the incoming sob-induced mess. âNot that he woulda let me.â
He hums resignedly.
Clearing your throat, you tuck your hands between your thighs. Swiftly moving on. âWhat was Iâ she like?â
He takes a long drink and sighs thickly when he comes up for air. He looks down at his hands when he talks as if choosing his words thoughtfully and carefully.
âStrong, smart. Stubborn. Far too fuckinâ stubborn.â
You force a smile over the flinch of pain in your chest. âGuess we got that in common.â
You reach up and twist the dog tag around your neck, feeling for the ring youâd slipped around the chain. You were never married legally but were in all the ways that mattered. Your heart aches for the brief moment of domesticity you shared with him. You expect him to be finished, but he once laughs, a smile cracking on his face.
âShe loved kidsâ had a soft spot for the weird ones.â He squints and rubs at the flesh between his knuckles where the blades typically protrude. âPut me in my place. Stood up for what was right.â
His words strike a chord in your heart, playing the familiar tune of yearning and guilt and grief. A swelling sensation rises from your stomach and youâre not sure if youâre going to scream, cry or throw up.
âWere youâ?â
âIn love with her? What, like you canât tell?â He interrupts, face hardening. Another drink. âIt doesnât matter. We argued one night and I refused to follow her back to the school, âbout the same time the humans went mutant hunting.â
Logan takes a moment to catch himself.
âWhen I came back, shit-faced from the bar, I realised Iâd gotten my version of you murdered, along with the rest of them. Laid up like a fucking log pile. Thatâs what loving me got you.â
The gruesome imagery sours the liquor in your stomach. You push the nausea down with a hard swallow.
âIâm sorry.â
âWhââ He jolts back, face pinched. âI got you killed, and youâre fuckinâ sorry?â
âThereâs a world where you didnât make that choice. You know, Iâm not proud of who I am, either,â you answer, softly. âAfter you left and I lost you⊠I got bitter, stopped pulling my punches.â
âYou never liked hurting people.â
âI didnât.â You take a deep breath, willing away the warmth that pools behind your eyes. You quickly regain composure with a short cough. âWhatever woman youâre comparing me to, I stopped being her a long time ago. Like you told meâ Iâm no hero.â
He grunts, looking like he regrets saying that now. Checkmate. Youâre not what either of you expected or yearned for in one another, but maybe youâre exactly what you both need.
âYou know, your accents thicker.â
He says it as if to draw a line of separation, but you take it as an invitation. Your head swims from the alcohol, and against what probably is your better judgement, you inch closer to him until your knees bump against each other.
âThatâs what I get for hidinâ in the mountains. Got adopted by a scary old lady and her church friends. I reckon she rubbed off on me. Youâd like her, I think,â you tell him fondly. Thereâs something wistful about it, imagining a life with him. You grieve a life you never had but somehow, in his company, the melancholy loosens its grip.
âMaybe we got lucky,â you add flatly.
He lifts the bottle with a dry laugh. âYou have a very funny idea of what lucky means, bub.â
âWell, I wouldnât be so sure. Yâsee, they didnât get lucky. They died, ânâ we lost each other,â you explain, glancing up at the stars as if either version of you would ever be in heaven, as if it was as loving enough as a motherâs womb to stretch wide enough to allow space for mutants.
God probably hated you just as much as they did down here.
You lower your head onto his shoulder. âBut, weâre still here. Maybe there was always space in my universe for you.â
âYouâre drunk,â he observes flatly, but he doesnât move.
âA little.â You get more comfortable against his tense bicep and close your eyes. âHumour me, why donât you?â
He sighs, but itâs gentle. âJust for a while.â
âGood, because youâre not very good at keeping your feelings quiet. I know you like this.â
âKeep that to yourself.â
You sigh, eyes remaining closed. âWe ainât gonna talk about it, are we?â You ask, in reference to the kiss.
âNope.â
A high-pitched whine resonates in your ears, vision blurring as if lying underneath a rippling river current. Paradox has just explained the stakes to you â to stop Cassandra, somebody would have to lay down on the wire and make the sacrifice play. This wasnât a matter of regeneration anymoreâ it was being ripped apart from the seams, atomised.
It just so happens that your cat, Kevin, has been loving his little journey around the TVA. Cheater.
âYou wonât survive it,â is what you say in response to Logan offering himself up for the job. What you really meant was: I donât think I can survive losing you again.
âI know,â Logan answers. His eyes drip to where you palm at the slow-healing wound on your side, courtesy of the Lady Deadpool variant. Youâre winded, running on fumes, and know youâre in no position to start throwing yourself out there as a suicide volunteer. Youâd never make the journey, let alone succeed in your venture.
âThatâs why itâs gotta be me,â Deadpool interrupts, peeling the mask from his face to address you both. âNeither of you asked for any of this. You were right. I lied. I lied right to both of your faces â just to get you to help me, and you did.â
âYou didnât lie,â Logan replies, throwing you a glance. âYou made an educated wish.â
He reaches into his pocket and slaps the bloodied Polaroid of Deadpoolâs friends against Wadeâs chest. The gesture is a final, silent acknowledgement of why any of you are here in the first place, and everything thatâs led to this moment.
âI got nothinâ back in my world,â he explains, the sharp arrow of his words striking a sting straight through your heart. âLet me do this. For you.â
You could see that this meant more to him, that he would only deem himself worthy and die a peaceful death if he could do it knowing he saved at least one variant of you. This is more than just a mission. This is his only chance to redeem himself, and you know youâre in no position to start trying to convince him that youâd have him either way. Fuck redemption.
Youâre parallel from one another, standing just outside of touching distance. It was a cruel existenceâ reaching out and never quite being able to hold on. Itâs inevitable, the pull you feel. Youâre dictated by his gravity but cursed by the narrative.
Your chest rises and falls with shallow, laboured breaths as you attempt to process whatâs happening, what heâs asking you to let him do. The pain in your side ebbs only from the comparative pain of watching another version of the man you love sacrifice himself for you.
His voice is a quiet whisper. âGive me this.â
But I love you. The words are there, hiding behind your clenched teeth, gnawing at the bars like a feral animal caged in the reminder that this isnât â shouldnât be â the man that you love.
Something shifts and as youâre running on the delirium of your battery running low, healing resources drained, you decide that you donât actually care to make the distinction any more.
Youâre in no condition to fight; you barely had the energy to argue with him, let alone stop him. But you canât just let him go.
One wobbly step forward. You poke his chest, mustering whatever energy remains to express your feelings in the only true way you know how. âIâŠâ you stammer, but you suddenly canât find the words.
His hand reaches up and he splays yours flat against his chest. Faintly, buried deep behind the armoured layer of his suit, you feel the distinct thunk, thunk of his heart. He exhales deeply when your empathetic energy transmission reaches the other side. Your eyes connect, and even through the sharp whites of his mask, you can feel the psionic pulse resonating between you twoâ strong enough that the wound on your side begins to sew itself together.
âI know,â he whispers.
And you believe that he does.
He nods shortly, releases your hand, and turns on his heel. You collapse against the control centre, eyes needling through the camera footage, desperate to watch the final moments and know that his sacrifice was worth it.
Itâs about the same time that Deadpool yanks his mask back on and barrels down the hallway after him.
âWade!â
You glance back at the party as you creep towards the apartment door to leave. Your consciousness has only recently slipped back into place, having hovered somewhere above your body for the entire time you witnessed your friends atomically ripped apart, only for them to return mere moments later.
You think it mightâve been witnessing Wolverine sweaty and shirtless that was finally the last straw for you. Youâre not sure youâve recovered since.
You thought you were being sneaky about your departure, but a flat hand reaches from out of view, splays and then holds the door closed.
âYou sure I canât convince you to stay?â Logan asks, voice slow and tentative.
âI ainât runninâ this time, I promise,â you answer. He rests his arm on the beam above him, making him appear even taller and maybe even more imposing. Your pulse quickens as you look up at him, trying to find the right words, ones that you hope wonât give you away. You nearly squeak. âI umâ justââ
He arches a brow, a hint of a micro-smirk playing at the corner of his mouth. He shifts, getting closer by just a fraction. âYeah?â
Trying to keep your distance is proving to be immensely hard when heâs gotten himself this deliciously close. His energy tastes of confidence, a stark contrast to the self-loathing only a mere few days prior. Itâs magnetic. If you make eye contact now, youâre not sure youâll be able to control yourself.
The atmosphere crackles with tension, like the static energy right before lightning strikes. His gaze is intense when you look at him, and with the way his eyes glance purposefully down at your parted lipsâ
Jesus. Pull yourself together.
You gently pull away from him and feel the spell of the moment dissolve. âI just⊠need time.â
Recognition flashes on his face, as well as a tick of disappointment, but he seems to understand.
A beat, then he taps the door before stepping aside. âAlright. Donât be a stranger.â
Wade bursts around the corner, arms wide and voice booming. Vanessa hangs off of his arm, white teeth gleaming with mischievous joy.
âWhoa, hey there, lovebirds! Whatâs going on hereâ a secret rendezvous? Looking for somewhere to sneak off? Should I cue the romantic music or just give you two some privacy?â
You jump in surprise at his sudden entrance, flinching away from Logan as if youâd been caught doing something you shouldnât. Loganâs expression shifts from whatever tender moment was brewing, spell broken, to a mix of exasperation and resignation, jaw tightening.
âWade,â he grumbles, voice sharp, but you can acknowledge thereâs a level of begrudging affection beneath the steely surface. âTiming, as usual, is impeccable.â
âUm, actually, I was just leavinâ,â you answer, tugging on your bag.
âWHAT!â Wade exclaims, face dropping. âWe havenât even gotten to our favourite part yet!â
You tick a brow. âOur favourite part?â
âThe cocaine part,â he says, matter-of-factually.
âWade, that was one time,â you pinch the bridge of your nose. âIâm sorry. Thank you for inviting me. I just canât miss my flight.â
Dogpool jumps at your ankles, whimpering and chewing on the hem of your jeans. You give her a gentle scratch on her head, deftly avoiding the lick of her impressive tongue. Wade scoops her up, holding her against his shoulder and kissing her affectionately on her wet nose.
âYou, ah, need a ride?â Logan offers.
Your heart stutters at his chivalrous attempt. âOh, um. Thatâs okayâ I called a cab. So.â
That was a lie. You hadnâtâ not yet. You just werenât sure if you were going to make the right decisions if you were alone in his company for an hour. Probably wouldnât make it to the airport without fighting or crying or making stupid choices.
He rubs his jaw. âRight.â
âIâll⊠see you around?â
âI better!â Wade yells, using two fingers to gesture that heâs keeping his eye on you as Vanessa yanks him around the corner gleefully.
A magnetic tether â or red string, whatever you want to call it â seems to strain when you walk away from Logan. You feel the pull in your chest, a fluttering of electricity, but you swallow the urges and ignore the way they scratch like glass on the way down.
You call an Uber, squeezing your bag tightly for a source of comfort as you crowd yourself into the back seat. You spare one last glance at the apartment and think for a brief moment you see a silhouette of someone watching you from the balcony, but they slip away into the light before you can discern it.
You know, though. Of course, you know.
You expected relief when you arrived home, but, instead, the aching, gnawing black hole in your chest seems to grow exponentially. You go through the motionsâ feed your cat, tend to the garden, eat the food with no appetite, go to Church.
The fixture of Jesus pinned to the cross gives you pause for the first time. You wonder if he was a mutant.
You werenât sure how much of this âtimeâ thing you were going to need to heal or make a decision on where you and Logan stood after everything, but only after your second night, sleepless and alone, do you start to doubt that this will be an easy process. You communicate like you know what youâre doing, but you havenât stopped shaking since he kissed you, like a newborn foal traversing ice.
You want to do things right. Youâre not trying to replace any missing pieces or live up to any expectations he might have of you. The girl he knew seemed to be a softer, sweeter (less traumatised) version of you, and you worry that youâd be constantly comparing him to a ghost of himself.
The rain lulls you as it patters on the window by your bed, but sleep doesnât take you.
You hear thunder, you think, and wonder if the chickens are frightened in their coops. However, the distant grumble continues to grow, reverberating through the floorboards of your rickety cabin. As it creeps closer you discern that itâs not a brewing stormâ but the growling engine of a motorcycle.
Awash with a deep sense of knowing, you throw yourself out of bed and knot a silk robe around your middle. The sound of the engine dissipates, replaced only by the hammering rain and the rushing pulse in your ears when you tear your door open.
You see himâ all leather jacket slick with rainwater and tight jeans, brows pinched against the onslaught of the weather as he dismounts his bike.
Logan.
When your eyes meet, thereâs a palpable shift in the air, and the storm, angry as a howling spirit, mirrors the turbulent emotions within you. You donât speak, you donât think, you just act.
Barefoot, dressed in your slip of a robe, you race down the short path and meet him halfway.
âLogan? Logan?â You call out. âWhat are you doinâ here?!â
âHad to see you,â he calls out between strides, voice nonchalant as if what heâs said was obvious.
Youâre closing the distance. âThatâs a dayâs ride, and the weatherââ
Instead of letting you finish, he grasps your face, kissing you suddenly and with a reverence so sincere that your knees feel gelatinous and weak. His thumbs brush away the raindropsâ tears? âthat drip over your crystallised lashes. His touch is both grounding and electrifying; the warmth of him pressed against you is a stark contrast to the chilling downpour.
Your fingers curl against the front of his jacket, clinging with equal fervour as if itâs the only thing keeping you anchored from floating someplace else. The strength of his body crowds over you, arm sliding down to capture you by your waist as you lean into him, syrupy-decadent and entirely reliant on him to keep you upright.
The kiss deepens, his tongue sliding over yours tasting both bittersweet and intoxicating in equal measures, like cigar smoke and peppermint gum. Thereâs a distinct sharpness of liqour and you wonder if he had a shot (or bottle) of courage before coming here. You breathe deeply against his skin, smelling rainwater, musk and gunpowder; your senses are completely overwhelmed by him and youâre not sure that anything could pull you away.
The red string knots.
When you both eventually take pause, gasping for air as the rain continues to pelt, his eyes lock with yours. He radiates relief, desire, and a raw vulnerability that makes your heart ache.
âYouâre freezinâ,â he murmurs, peppering kisses against your lips, your cold nose, and pulling one of your hands to his face to peck along your palm. You feel dizzy in his embrace, drunk on his lips.
âYou should come inside,â you whisper, âbefore the neighbours start askinâ questions.â
He quietly nods, kissing your fingers before following you inside and ducking away from the rain.
Once inside, he shakes the rain from his hair with a flick, eyes immediately roaming around the innards of your respectable (tiny) house, the size of him immediately proportionally shrinking the interior. He absorbs your surroundings, chivalrously pretending like he canât see every curve of you in that wet material.
You lead him towards the heath, lighting a small fire to help dry you both off. You leave, pottering around to gather some towels for your hair, and arrive back to see heâs peeled off the top layer of his clothes, leaving him half-exposed, his back an impressive marvel of rippling muscle. He glances at you over his shoulder.
Youâre lost for words, but canât just stand there ogling him. âUm, I donât think I have any spare clothes thatâll⊠fitâŠâ
When he turns to face you, his rain-slick torso shines in the firelight, skin glistening on the taught muscles of his biceps as he accepts a towel from you. Your words lag, entirely distracted by the realisation of one thing when you glance down at his v-line and dark, coiling hair that creeps down into his jeans: youâre absolutely going to have sex with this man.
You mightâve decided that when you watched the way his jeans clung to him when he dismounted his motorcycle, but thatâs beside the point.
âThatâs alright,â he answers, towel slung over his shoulder, eyes roving shamelessly over the damp, silky robe that clings to your silhouette effortlessly. âDonât need âem.â
Your mouth dries when he steps closer to you, head angled, lips centimetres apart.
âLoganâŠâ you breathe, tone edging toward a warning.
He presses against you, tilting you back. âTell me you donât want this, and Iâll stop. Iâll get back on that bike and Iâll leave.â
You creep further away, trying to catch your breath. âIââ
The words donât manifest, simply because you donât have it in you to lieâ to deny yourself of this.
He cages you in against the wall, shrinking you underneath his frame, eyes narrowed and dark as they search for yours through lowered lashes. âTell me you donât feel somethinâ, and Iâll walk away. You wonât see me again.â
His bare-chested proximity was overwhelming you. Youâre acutely aware of every inch of his skin that touches yours, pebbled nipples hard against his warm flesh, stubbled jaw nuzzling against your neck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. You feel like a teenager again, anxious and hormonal, a ball of puppy fat and unrequited crushes. The space between your thighs positively aches with heat, throbbing like a second heartbeat.
âI canât⊠I canât tell you that I feel something.â
He leans back, lips quirked with a flash of disappointment.
You blink up at him. âLet me show you instead.â
He ticks an eyebrow.
You use your empathetic influence to decrease his heartbeat, relaxing him down to the bone. He sighs, nosing against your shoulder, arms flexing as he holds himself up against you.
âJust with a little influenceâŠâ you stroke your way up from the slow pulse in his neck to his jaw, capturing him swiftly. You use your mutation to increase his heart rate this time, hiking it up to an excitable level. His cheeks begin to flush, pupils dilated, lips parted with the anticipation of your kiss. His eyes darken with something intrinsically primal and hungry.
âDoes it excite you?â You ask, innocently.
He shakes his head all dog-like as if to regain control, canine showing as his lips curl into a wolfish grin.
âYouâre not the only one with⊠tricks. I can do that, tooâ in other ways,â he says, tone low and suggestive. He lifts a hand, tracing a knuckle over your exposed collarbone, shifting the soft material of your robe just an inch. Your breath hitches.
âYou know I can hear your heartbeat, right?â
You blush. You hadnât known that.
You challenge his eye contact, feigning self-control and authority. The stare-down has your pulse spiking, arousal ricocheting down your spine and sitting low and syrupy in your belly.
âYour heartâs beating pretty fast, too.â
Oh, Hell. Heâs got you melted like butter in a pan.
You rest your head against the wall, breath quickening. âIf we do this, I donât think Iâll be able to stop.â
âGood,â he growls. âI donât like to stop.â
The teasing back-and-forth game of teetering towards nearly touching finally gets the better of you. Youâre weak, as malleable as soft dough, so you invite him against your mouth with a sigh-wine and a tug on the nape of his neck.
He positively devours you, a hand palming at your breast as you kiss desperately and feverishly. The shoulder of your robe slips and youâre half-exposed, the slip barely holding itself together by the loose knot on your waist. He pulls you impossibly closer, the skin of his chest flush against yours as he reaches and digs fingers into the globe of your ass, hips twitching together.
You fumble between your bodies, yanking on his belt buckle and zipper impatiently. He pulls backwards, a wet string of spit snapping between your lips as you separate, helping you with steadier fingers to remove his jeans. With equal passion, he swiftly tugs on the waist-tie of your robe and discards it somewhere on the floor.
When youâre both bare, nude silhouettes sharp and soft in the firelight, he stumbles you over to the plush rug in the centre of the room. He nods to the couch.
âLegs up.â
You obey without hesitation, taking your seat and spreading decadently for him. He kneels below you of you, hips between your ankles, and gazes at you like a hungry, stalking animal. You feel impossibly sexy and dangerous.
He peppers kisses along the bone of your ankle first, foot hiked up onto his shoulder, only breaking eye contact to flutter his eyes closed. He moves along the inner length of your leg, pausing keenly against the sensitive partsâ the thin stretch behind your knee, the soft plush of your thigh. He lowers himself, scruff tickling between your legs, and then licks a molten stroke between your folds, parting you with his tongue and burying his face deeper.
You clench around his skull, mindfulness of your heightened mutant abilities long forgotten. You canât crush metal between your thighs. Or can you?
He groans into you, varying suckling and kissing you on your clit with long strokes on the blade of his tongue to your hole, lapping up the nectar of your arousal, fingers digging bruisingly into your hips. The sting of his grip and the relentless lave of his tongue entice moans from you, fingers raking into his hair for some semblance of reality grounding in your pleasure-lapsed consciousness.
Jesus. With as filthy as his mouth was, you shouldâve known he would be this good at eating pussy.
You come quick, orgasm pulsing on his lips. The burn of overstimulation seizes your muscles, writhing against his onslaught, but he shoves your hips down.
âNot done with you yet,â he murmurs possessively, leaning back to wipe his chin. âOn all fours.â
You bite your lower lip, suppressing the humiliation of the intimacy (vulgarity) of it. You turn, belly still clenching with the aftershocks, arching with the anticipation, whining moments later when his mouth reconnects with you. His hands palm at your ass, spreading you wider, tongue slipping dangerously close to the tight ring of muscle.
He slides a finger knuckle-deep, miming fucking you in a rhythmic pulse. His other hand massages you, thumb sliding down until you jerk sensitively against his nudging intrusion.
You feel impossibly full and tingly, clenching around the burn of his thumb and the velvet of his finger, second orgasm surging and bubbling over with your face pressed against the couch cushion, lips agape. Youâre slick, drip-dropping onto his cupping palm, every nerve in your body burning raw as his wrist works you through the pulses.
You turn over, relishing in the sight of his scruff glistening with the aftermath of your orgasm, his eyes dark with lustâ a hellish man, seraphic on his knees for you. Your insides clench at the sight as he quite literally shatters and redefines what worship means to you.
âTired already?â He hums, massaging your hips.
You perk a challenging brow. âThat was just the warm-up, old man.â
âAlright,â he seethes, sucking on his lower lip as he lifts himself up to your level. âShow me what you got then, baby.â
When you kiss, his mouth slides against yours, drenched with the taste of yourself. His cock steels against your belly when you pull him close, tip pearl-smooth with precum when you reach down and grasp him with a hollowed fist. The feel of him, heavy and warm in your grip, fans to life the flames of your briefly quenched arousal, and you hungrily pull him down onto the couch beside you.
Moisture pools on your tongue as you rub him. You spit on your hand before stroking him from the base to tip, lathering him silky with your drool. You tuck your hair behind your ears, narrowing your cheeks as you slide your mouth up and down his length, fisting the inches that remain.
âChrist.â He twitches in your mouth as you gently massage the warm weight of his sac, lewd sounds emanating from where your lips and tongue meet him. âJust like that. Good fuckinâ girl,â he snarls, gripping your hair in a fist at the crown of your head. Your engine purrs with his encouragement, revving with newfound enthusiasm.
You always gave as good as you got, after all, and youâre certainly not one to back away from a challenge.
His head lolls onto the back of the couch, thighs tense beneath you, cock hot and hard on your tongue. He growls when he comes, pulsing strongly in your mouth as you lap up the produce of his orgasm, salty and molten down your throat.
âFuck, fuck, fuckââ
âPut those regenerative powers to good use, why donât you?â You ask, working him through the over-sensitivity with your wrist. His eyes donât once leave yours, even as they glaze over and flinch from the pleasure burn. Thereâs a sharp look of challenging determination on his faceâ a grit of his teeth, the furrow in his brow. He remains hard in your hands and you perk an impressed brow. Not bad for an old man.
Thereâs a sweet moment of vulnerability when you crawl over him, a brief sobering in the cloud of lust, a clarity of two not-quite strangers and their shared grief and yearning.
Youâre not sure where this moment will take you, but the love of somebody scraping together the shards of a shattered heart for a brief time, even as it cuts their hands, holds you with a semblance of human connection so sincere that youâll carry it with you for a lifetime.
His thighs spread to accommodate you. You hold your fingers against the thick chords in his neck for support as you fumble between your bodies, slotting him against the catch in your cunt before lowering yourself entirely.
You hiss against the intrusion and he steadies you with a hand on your hip.
âEasy. Donât hurt yourself.â
You laugh-moan, laying your palms against the coils of hair on his sweat-shimmering chest.
âI can take it.â
The fire, intended to help dry you off, creates a heated environment that beads sweat on his temple. The only brain cells that remain coherent bounce around on lust in your skull â so you lean forward, lick the salty droplet clean, and sigh-whine as you begin rocking against him.
You fall into sync quickly, a desperate rhythm of desperate bodies. The delicious ache of him inside you is a masochistic thrill, similar to the irresistible press on a day-old bruise. The squelching shlick between your bodies is an animalistic reminder of your flesh and blood as you chase the pleasure, bouncing with vigour.
âChristâ I can feel youâŠâ his jaw clenches with resolve, fingers digging into the meat of your ass. ââŠdripping all over me. You wanted this bad, huh?â
âWanted to ride you in that fuckinâ Honda,â you straighten your posture, leaning away from him to hold your breasts, panting words between bated breaths. âThought it might shut you up.â
His hand snaps up and grabs you roughly by the chin. âMm⊠mouthy, arenât ya?â
You grin. âYou got no idea, lumberjack.â
He pulls your face against him, meeting your mouth halfway in a sloppier, fever-driven kiss that shoots arousal to your core like a shot of his favourite whiskey. Something feral stirs within you: a primal, cellular-deep need to connect with him further. Your empathetic power roils off of you like steam on a hot spring, surging into and merging with him until thereâs nothing but one feeling, a black hole of unquenchable desire.
You suddenly feel as though you are him: navel-deep, a throbbing muscle with an aching desire to dive further into the serpent-clutch of your cunt, gliding through tingly, honey-silk velvet, blades hanging onto a tether of self-control as they threaten to slide out of your knuckles in ecstasy.
Well. This was certainly new. Add âvoodoo sex dollâ to your list of mutations.
You gasp, ripping away from the kiss, your powers recoiling back into you at whip-lash speed, dizzying in its ferocity. His eyes meet yours with darkened curiosity.
âDid youââ
âI felt that,â he grunts, tongue darting out to roll over his lips. âIt always like that for you? Feelinâ so fuckinâ full?â
You half-laugh blissfully. âOnly the good times.â
âIâll show you a good time, alright.â
He isnât gentle when he manhandles you, forcing you into an arch as he repositions and aligns himself behind your thighs, one foot planted firmly on the floor, the other bent to accommodate the new angle. He reinserts himself inside of you with ease, hands palming your hips and ass.
You feel him nudging cervix-deep and you reach out, clawing at the couch to hold your jerking body steady against the relentless slap of his hips. Thereâs no need to tell him faster or harder when you feel the metal plate of his adamantium hips pressing against your ass, pounding and vulgar with the sound of sweat-damp skin-on-skin.
Itâs involuntary, the way you pant and cry out, intoxicated by the relentless drag and pull of his cock. He says something to you but you either donât hear him or have enough conscious space in your sex-drunk fog to process words and respond. He slides a hand down your spine and pulls on your hair until youâre upright, breath hot when it fans against your neck.
âWhereâs that mouth gone?â
You lick the drool from your lip, throwing him a glance over your shoulder. âFuck you.â
The half-lidded up-and-down look he gives you as satisfaction grows slowly on his lips turns your bones to jelly. âThere she is,â he growls back, offering a sharp slap of encouragement on your ass as he drops you back onto your front. You involuntarily grip around him, puffy clit throbbing with the almost-but-not-quite-there anticipatory build. âYou gonna come for me? Yeah? I can fuckinâ feel it.â
You slide a hand underneath yourself, reaching for the swollen nub with two fingers. Youâre overwhelmed with kinetic energy akin to a fizzy champagne bottleâ two more shakes until youâre ready to pop.
You hear a Snikt! behind you, accompanied by a throat-caught groan, and then the distinct ripping shred of blades impaling your couch. You finally come, hard, when you feel him throbbing inside of you, followed by the decadent syrupy flood of his orgasm filling you up. He ruts into you one, two three more final times, milking himself dry, before collapsing over your body in a sweaty heap, sparing you the weight of his metal bones with a forearm propped next to you.
Shared fluids drip to the couch when he eventually pulls out of you, blades retreating into his clenched fists. The fluffy innards of the chair spill out beside you, and, while you were in no financial position to afford another, the sight entices a humoured smile from you.
âSorry,â he says with a wince, helping you sit up when your unreliable legs shake beneath you.
âThatâs alright. Itâll make for an interestinâ story,â you retort, fanning yourself with a hand. You both let out a shared laugh, mostly from the relieved delirium of it all. After a beat, you lean into him, massaging a hand across his belly. âSo. We really doinâ this?â
His face softens. âIf youâll have me.â
You cup his face and kiss his cheek. âIâd take any version of you I could get.â
divider credits: @/vysleix and @/cafekitsune tag list: @bearwithegg, @uhlunaro, @sseleniaa, @jxssimae, @autumnsymphony
#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#james logan howlett#wolverine#x reader#deadpool and wolverine#honda odyssey#logan x reader
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â REMIND ME! â SYLUS QIN.
summary. six months after your breakup with sylus, news broke of you moving on, which is something he simply cannot allowânot if he can help it.
warnings. fem! reader, infidelity, pet names, established history, hair pulling, face sitting, oral ( fem. receiving ), doggy style, missionary, creampie, aftercare. wc. 6.1k.
â â â â â â â â â ⧠masterlist | request
Once news broke the N109 Zone of a prospering romance in his district, Sylus couldnât find it in himself to give a damn. It was when he heard whispers of your name adjacent to another manâs that he began to listen.
He was out the front door of his home within a second, his leg swinging over his bike before Luke and Kieran could have a say in the matter.
The two men stood side by side, shouting a frantic âitâs normal to move on, man!â and a âitâs been six months!â from the doorstep as they watched their white haired boss speed away.
Sylus was sure that if he gripped the handlebars of his motorcycle any tighter, theyâd certainly break off.
If he was willing to harm his most prized possession over the pure frustration youâve stirred within him, you should consider yourself the most lucky yet damned woman alive.
He liked to think he was headstrong, but when it came to you, he lost all of his sense. All rationale was long forgotten. You consumed him and he gladly let you, because all in all, it truly was a blessing and a curse.
For how much he loved to put the pedal to the metal, heâs never once arrived at your apartment as fast as he has just now. He didnât even bother to properly leave his bike in between the lines of a parking spot before he was practically flying towards your front door, knocking rapidly until you answered.
Surprise is etched into your facial features as you crack the door open just enough to see who your uninvited guest was, but a strong hand pushed it open until it was agape. âWhat the fuââ
âWhere is he?â he cuts you off with a question, his red eyes scanning your cozy living room like a predator on the prowl.
âExcuse you, Iâ what? Where is who?â Your questions stammer out as your brain tries to catch up to the scene in front of you.
Sylus forces himself to turn around and face you, realizing that his erratic behavior was likely confusing you. As expressed, his common sense was truly slipping from him. God, heâs missed you, and he absolutely hates the look youâre giving him. It was one that made him feel like a pure inconvenience to you (even though he certainly was behaving like it).
âYour⊠boyfriend,â he clarifies, almost choking on the word. The fact that the title was no longer his was already a problem in and of itself, but losing it to another man was something he simply could not allow. âWhere is he?â
âOh, I see,â you say, narrowing your eyes at him as you give him a once over. âYou think that youâre going to barge into my apartment and pummel the ever living shit out of my boyfriend?â
âMore or less,â he answers, his long strides continuing a bit further down your hallway. âPreferably more.â
You scoff, leaning against the wall with your arms crossed tightly over your chest as you watch your exâboyfriend scope out your apartment that heâs all too familiar with.
âHe isnât here.â
âSo Iâve gathered,â he replies, his head poking into your bedroom.
Sylus did his best to sound nonchalant, as aloof as can be, though his heart rate was through the roof. He saw no signs of any male presenceâno messily discarded clothes, no misplaced shoes, no second toothbrush in the bathroomâwhich meant that your relationship wasnât as serious as heâd imagined.
And boy, was he relieved to figure that much out.
You straighten off the wall as he enters your bedroom, hurriedly walking behind him as you speak, âYâknow, since your objective for coming here canât be achieved, you are more than welcome to leave.â
âDid I say that was my only objective?â he simply asks, eyes scanning your bedroom.
A bit had changed since heâd last been in here. You changed your comforter to a floral pattern, and you even matched the drapes to the shade of your bedding. Your attention to detail was something he admired about you, and his attention to detail was something you used to love, though as his eyes fell to your open underwear drawerâyouâre growing to hate it. A lot.
âGet out of there!â you exclaim, rushing to shove it closed, only to catch his slender finger in the crossfire.
He winces slightly, lifting his already bruising finger to your line of vision. âYouâve wounded me, sweetie. Kiss it better?â
You scoff, slightly pushing his hand away from your face. In any other context, you would have apologized, but given the fact that Sylus had entered your apartment without invitation and threatened to harm your boyfriend within five minutes of his arrival was enough to make you think that this made the two of you almost even.
A small smirk tugs at Sylusâs lips as he presses his finger to his tongue, soothing the stinging that you caused. Your eyes linger on his mouth for a bit longer than they should, and if he noticed (which he certainly did), he didnât say anything.
âI see you went shopping,â he mumbles, his eyes falling to your now closed underwear drawer. âThatâs a shame, baby. A damn shame.â
You canât help the scoff that leaves your mouth. âWhyâs that?â
âI hate the idea of another man seeing whatâs mine,â Sylus answers, tilting his head to the side as he gives your body an agonizingly slow once over, âin such pretty fabric, at that.â
Heat rushes to your face at his implication, and youâre not sure if itâs because youâre uncomfortable or if youâre flustered by his forwardness. You figure itâs a mixture of both, but you mask it with an annoyed huff.
âI can do what I want,â you refute, crossing your arms over your chest. âAnd if what I want is to buy panties that youâll never have the privilege of seeing me wear, then thatâs exactly what Iâll do.â
Sylus clicks his tongue, shaking his head with the slightest smirk curving upwards on his lips. He finds your attitude to be just as adorable as it is frustrating. With the way you look, arms tightly crossed over your chest with the tiniest wrinkle in between your eyebrows, heâd liken you to an angry kitten.
âIf youâre trying to rile me up, youâre succeeding,â he states, drumming his fingers on your dresser.
Your eyes flit away. âIâm not trying to do anything. In fact, I want nothing to do with you.â
He scoffs, crossing his arms over his broad chest. Itâs the first time heâs looked remotely upset with you from the moment he arrived. âYour boyfriend may fall for this little act of yours, but I wonât.â
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â
Sylus straightens up, his tall frame towering over you. You almost feel antsy under his gaze, but you do your best to hide it.
âI am what your heart truly desires,â he quietly murmurs, his finger tracing from the middle of your collarbones to the valley of your breasts. âAnd you can lie to him, you can even lie to yourselfâbut you cannot lie to me. I can see your deepest desires, remember?â
Betrayal is your bodyâs first instinct. Your breath hitches in your throat the moment the pad of his index finger runs across your skin, and you physically have to fight off a whine from escaping your lips.
In an attempt to salvage the situation, you straighten up, glancing towards your bedroom door. âThatâs⊠bullshit, Sylus. Get out of my head.â
âItâs nothing of the sort,â he replies with a much gentler tone than the one he possessed prior. âAnd Iâll do no such thing. Your mind is my favorite place to be.â
He studies his reddened finger for a moment, silently deciding to steer the conversation from its more serious direction. âIt still wonât feel better until it gets a kiss from its favorite girl, you know.â
Against your better judgment, your eyes betray you by studying the reddened pad of his finger. It shouldnât be as enticing of a view as it is. You find it to be almost criminal.
âYou can lose that finger for all I care,â you scoff, trying not to remember how good it used to feel inside of you.
âSo brash.â Sylus forces a pout on his lips, though it doesnât last long. He presses a kiss to his own finger before he extends his arm to rest on the edge of your dresser, keeping you caged against your drawers.
âYouâre awfully lucky that Iâm a forgiving man,â he murmurs, his red eyes trained to yours. âYou can do almost anything to me and Iâd allow it.â
Judging by the way your expression lights up, that seems to give you an idea.
âReally?â you inquire, narrowing your eyes. âSay, if I punched you square in your face, would you allow it?â
âIâm not opposed to finding out,â he answers, his eyelids fluttering as he continues to drink in your beauty. âYou know I love it when youâre rough with me.â
That comment forces a flush to your face, and you almost have to pinch yourself to keep your mind from bringing forward all of the memories that proved just how true that statement was.
It infuriates you how easily he could get a reaction out of you, no less than six months after you broke up with him. Perhaps that was why, in a split second decision (one that youâre hardly aware youâre making), your fist goes flying towards his face.
Sylus firmly stops your wielding hand before it can make contact with his cheek. His fingers unwind your fist and bring your hand close, allowing him to press a few chaste kisses to your knuckles.
âHave I told you how pretty you look today?â he asks, his voice slightly muffled by the kisses heâs peppering along your palm and wrist. âSo, so beautiful.â
Only he would say such a thing after you attempted to inflict bodily harm upon him. You wish you could rationalize his behavior, but you canâtâthatâs just Sylus.
Your body betrays you in every way, shape, and form. Your face is flushed, your eyes are half lidded, and the mere contact of his lips on your knuckles is enough for butterflies to flutter in your stomach.
Grasping onto the last bit of common sense you have, you pull your hand from his grasp.
âItâs time for you to go,â you insist, beginning to slide against the dresser to escape his gaze.
Sylus allows you to create a bit of distance between the two of you, lifting his arm up from your dresser to let you walk away. The last thing he wants is to make you feel suffocatedâthe very reason you broke up with him in the first place.
He tried to do better, but when it came to you, he couldnât help himself. He wasnât an animal, though. He loved you more than words could ever describe, and heâd allow you anything you wanted. And if physical space was what you wanted, heâd grant it to you.
âYou know Iâd do anything for you,â he quietly says, his voice carrying an unforeseen vulnerability to it, âbut I canât do what youâre asking of me. I canât let you give yourself to a man who doesnât deserve you.â
Your eyebrows raise. âHow can you be so sure he doesnât deserve me?â
âI know you, baby. Thatâs how.â
A beat of silence passes, and he conjures up the courage to continue. âAnd Iâm positive there isnât a single soul who could possibly deserve your favor,â Sylus reasons, loosely crossing his arms, his toned biceps showing through the sleeves of his black buttonâup shirt. âNot even myself. Iâm man enough to recognize that.â
His answer catches you off guard, but you do your best to maintain your front. You donât want him to see how his words seem to squeeze at your heart.
âThen why are you here?â you genuinely ask.
Sylus knows heâs backed himself into a corner, and contrary to what you might think, heâd intended to do just that. He wants you to give him the green light to speak every word that heâs longed to say to you from the moment heâd seen you last, and now that you have, the floodgates are open.
âIâm selfish,â he admits, taking a tentative step towards you. âIâm drunk on you, and I canât bear the thought of sobering up, even after all this time. Itâs unfair, itâs horrible, itâs cruelâI know this, sweetie. But⊠I find my serenity in your eyes, and with you gone, my life is purgatory. The confines of hell must be more pleasant than what it is that I feel when Iâm without you.â
Internally, youâre floored. Gobsmacked, even. Externally, youâre looking at him with the same soft expression youâve worn this entire time.
Met with your silence, Sylus begins to internally panic. He slowly takes a few steps towards you, and when you donât attempt to maintain the distance between you, his hands move to cup your face.
âRid me of this life,â he whispers, his mouth so close that you can feel the warmth of his breath fan across your lips. âI cannot go on, not without you beside me.â
You truly hate how easy it is for him to reduce you to nothing but putty. You have a new boyfriend, youâve moved on, youâve allowed the love that you and Sylus shared to be nothing more than history.
You wanted to believe that moving forward was the best thing you could do, but if that was true, why is it that your heart hadnât felt full until you laid eyes on Sylus? It seems to beat differently, like itâs finally come back to life in his presence.
Noticing the softening of your eyes, Sylus canât help himself. He leans forward and presses a kiss to your forehead, holding both of you there for a few seconds. The sheer tenderness of his action was enough to make you melt, and you were sure you wouldâve if his hands on your face werenât grounding you.
âIâve missed you so much,â he admits, tilting your head up so that he can look into your eyes.
Sylus was never one for verbal affection (or being desperate for a womanâs favor) prior to you, but heâd make this exception a million times over if it meant he could have you however youâd let him.
Youâve nearly forgotten all of your allegiances, and you canât even blame yourself for it. You know that indulging in him is like eating a forbidden fruit, and even then, you canât forbid yourself from its tasteânot when you know how sweet it is. What you feel goes beyond want; itâs pure, unadulterated need.
âNo response for me?â he asks.
You shake your head, swallowing the growing lump in your throat. You carefully slide out of his grasp and sit on the edge of your bed, his eyes trailing you as you do so.
Youâre a firm believer that nothing is real until youâve said it out loud, Sylus is more than aware of that. He doesnât want to push you too hard, too fast, too much, but heâs never been one to back down from a challenge.
As you sit, your thighs naturally part and your skirt rides up just a bit, enough for the pink fabric clothing your pussy to be shown. That sight alone was able to elicit behavior that youâve never once seen from Sylus.
âGod, you are a privilege,â he murmurs, taking a few steps towards you. Without hesitation, he slowly descends to his knees before you, his hands trailing up your thighs. âSuch a sight,â he adds his eyes flitting to the dampening fabric of your underwear, âsuch a beautiful sight.â
If his words werenât enough, the sight of him kneeling in front of you was enough to make you faint. (Or scream. Or cum. Maybe all three at the same time, youâre not sure.)
âAllow me the night,â Sylus pleads, his desperate red eyes finally locking onto yours. His hand moves to brush your hair from your face, tucking it loosely behind your ear. âJust the night. One night to indulge you.â
Lying would be no use, all things considered. Heâd already shamelessly eyed the needy area between your thighs, knowing that the arousal collecting there is for him. Your stomach swirls with a mixture of guilt and need, and you honestly feel like youâre in an impossible position.
âSylus,â you breathe, your heartbeat thumping so hard that youâre surprised your chest hasnât burst. âThis is so wrong.â
He shakes his head as his large, gentle hands move to rest on your knees. âYour pleasure means more to me than a simple case of right and wrong.â
âI wish it was as simple as you make it seem,â you say, a long sigh leaving you.
âCanât it be?â Sylus questions, his thumbs idly stroking your knees. âAllow me this one night to remind you of how I feel about you, how you feel about me. If you want me to leave you alone by the time morning comes, I will accept that with a smile.â
Youâd like to imagine that youâre stronger than this, that the idea of a final night of lovemaking with your ex-boyfriend to get him out of your head for good isnât appealingâbut it is.
Itâs something youâve thought about before (in the dead of night with your hand stuffed down your shorts), but never did you think it could become a reality.
Only now, with him kneeling in front of you, it was.
âOkay,â you sheepishly murmur. âRemind me.â
You know this is absolutely horrible of you to do, but you canât find the will to deny yourself this. As much as you tried to get Sylus out of your head, you never could. Not long enough for it to make a difference, anyway.
(Perhaps this, a final intimate night between the two of you, will be just what you need to move on for good.)
Sylus knows that his time with you is limited, but he plans to make it the best night of your existence.
(Perhaps if he can remind you of how much heâs willing to give, how much he loves you, how much heâs missed youâyouâll change your mind.)
His large, strong hands trail up as he drapes your legs over his shoulders, pressing a few kisses to your calves and inner thighs. He presses a kiss to the fabric of your underwear, his tongue drawing out to taste the wet spot.
Sylus isnât sure whatâs come over him, but he honestly feels like heâll either implode or cry at the sight of you right now. To have you again is something heâs dreamt about more than heâd like to admit, and he plans to show you just how much your absence has affected him as his fingers slide beneath your skirt to hook under the thin fabric of your underwear.
âThank you,â he mutters against your skin, tugging the clothing piece down your legs. âOh, fuck,â he mutters aloud the moment his eyes land on your heat.
He could seriously cum in his pants right now, and if heâs not careful, he will. His hands lock onto your thighs, pulling you to the edge of the bed to give him better access to your glistening cunt.
âPussyâs all mine,â he breathes, licking a long stripe up your slit.
You would have replied if he hadnât buried his face in between your thighs. His tongue laps at your wetness before he wraps his lips around your clit, sucking harshly at it with hollowed cheeks.
A cry leaves your lips at the sensation, your hand gripping onto his white hair as you revel in the feeling his tongue is giving you.
Heâs eating you out like a man starved, his own moans rumbling into your cunt, his cock straining against the confines of his pants. Sylus could do this for days if you let him, but after not having you like this for so long, he canât help himself from needing more.
Within moments, heâs slowly pushing you higher on your bed, still licking at your pussy until heâs physically unable to. He looks up at you with crazed eyes, licking his spit-slick lips as he kicks his shoes off.
âSit on my face,â he murmurs, moving to lay on your bed. When heâs met with your hesitance, heâs grasping onto your arm to carefully pull you towards him. âI might die without it.â
Youâve never once seen a man so pussy drunk in your entire life, but youâre in absolutely no position to deny him. So, you move to hover above him, your hands resting on your headboard. You hear a satisfied moan beneath you, and heâs soon hooking his arms around your thighs.
âYou wonât die without it,â you grumble. âIn fact, you might die because of it. Suffocationââ
âSuffocation of this kind might be the best way to go,â he cuts you off, licking a faint swipe against your folds. âIn fact, when weâre old and withered, it might be my last ask of you.â
Your face flushes, and you can feel heat rushing to both your cunt and your cheeks. Noticing the coy face youâre making, Sylus canât help himself from laying a faint smack on your ass, squeezing its plushness as he stares up at you.
âFor now, though,â he purrs, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh. âI want you to let go for me. Canât have you dangling this pretty cunt in my face without letting me taste it.â
As you hesitantly begin to relax your thighs and lower on top of him, he lifts his head up to meet you halfway and gather your slick on his tongue.
âVery good, baby,â Sylus purrs, dropping his head back onto your sheets as he pulls your hips down the rest of the way, ânow sit.â
When all of your weight crashes down on him, a soft gasp leaves your lips at the sheer passion behind the movements of his tongue. He almost seems to be more incentivized. His eyes flutter shut as he mouths at your pussy, the moans leaving his mouth in combination with the absolute filthy sounds of his tongue are enough to drive you insane.
Sylus feels like heâs finally left purgatory and has transcended into heaven. With his pretty girl on his face, taking her on his tongue, making the most beautiful little noisesâheâs honestly never felt better.
(Well, there is that whole new boyfriend thing looming in the back of his mind, but heâs sure that youâll take care of that once heâs done taking care of you.)
One of your hands leaves the headboard to grasp onto his hair, your eyes screwing shut as you rock your hips over his tongue. âSylus,â you breathe out through a moan. âIâmâ oh, shitââ
Sylusâs cock twitches as you moan his name, his eyes fluttering shut as one of his hands help to guide the rocking of your hips. With his other, he palms himself through his trousers, his mouth working tirelessly to make you feel good.
Even as self-admittedly selfish as he is, he canât bear the idea of putting his pleasure above your ownâeven if the ache is physically eating away at him. With you writhing above him, the sounds youâre making, the look on your face, itâs all too muchâeven for him.
Your mouth lulls open as you let out the most beautiful whine heâs ever heard, and his tongue slows down, working you through your first orgasm of the night. He eagerly collects your juices with his tongue, his eyes rolling back as he finally presses a final kiss to your swollen clit.
âI can stay this way forever,â he says against your inner thigh, placing a kiss to your warm skin, âyou and me,â he places another kiss, âtogether.â
You shift to lay beside him, out of breath and looking beautifully disheveled. Sylus licks his lips and lies starryâeyed beside you. Soon enough, a huff of laughter escaped his throat, realizing he mightâve said too much there.
Sylus turns his head to look at you. âWas that enough to get an âI miss you tooâ out of that mouth of yours?â
You let out a breathless laugh, your hand running over your face. âNo,â you lie.
That was the best orgasm youâve had since your breakup, but he doesnât need to know that.
âYouâve developed quite the attitude,â he muses, rolling on top of you. He slots his lips against yours, licking into your mouth, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue. âThat boyfriend of yours must not fuck it out of you like he should,â he adds, the low volume of his voice rumbling against your skin as he kisses along your jaw, âlike I can.â
Before you can think twice, youâre lifting your hips against the bulge in his pants, a soft gasp escapes your lips as you feel the very prominent shape of his hardened cock. With a grunt, Sylus pushes your hips down, his fingers brushing against your inner thighs.
âSuch a needy little thing,â he chastises, his hand moving to cup your mound. âFirst youâre insisting I leave, and now youâre hoping Iâll give you my cock. Youâre sending me mixed signals here, sweetie.â
Youâre seeing stars, and your hand grasps onto his wrist, feeling the way his muscles tense as he begins to toy with your clit.
âI want it,â you whine, your toes curling as the pad of his middle finger circles your entrance, âyouâre⊠youâre being a tease.â
âThatâs right,â he whispers, licking a long stripe up your neck. âIf you want it bad enough, youâre going to have to prove it, baby.â
Your head tilts to the side as Sylus pulls away from your neck to look down at you. His fingers move to work at the button of your skirt, tugging it down your legs and tossing it onto the floor of your room.
âHow?â you ask.
He presses his lips to yours as his hands tug up your shirt, breaking the kiss to carefully pull it over your head. His large hands palm at your breasts, bringing your perked nipples in between his fingers.
âPick up the phone,â Sylus answers, releasing your breasts to sit up in front of you, his hands moving to undo his belt.
Your curiosity soon turns into something much more lustful as he pulls his trousers and boxers down his thighs. His shirt goes next, the articles of clothing decorating your floor. His cock looks even better than you remember, but he snaps his fingers in front of your face to gather your attention.
âSorry, what?â you ask, shaking your head to snap yourself out of your trance.
âPick up the phone,â he repeats, reaching to your bedside table to hand you your cell.
You take the device from him, looking at it with confusion. You were embarrassed that you hadnât even noticed it ringing, far too distracted by the sight of him stroking his hand along his length, but your embarrassment soon turns into dread as you read the caller ID.
It is, of course, none other than your boyfriend.
âSylus, thatâsâ thatâs crazy,â you stammer out, looking between his eyes, his dick, and your phone.
He snickers, flipping you onto your stomach. His hands grasp onto the plush of your hips to pull your ass up. âWhatâs crazy is the fact that you expect me to fuck you without your boyfriendâs knowledge.â
âYouâre above adultery?â you gasp out.
Sylus shakes his head, his hand moving to prod your entrance with the tip of his cock, his other hand grasping onto your hair to pull you back against his chest.
âObviously not,â he replies, licking along the shell of your ear. âJust want to show him how beneath it you are.â
Your heart slams against your chest as he takes the device from you and answers the call, holding the phone to your ear.
âLet him hear,â he purrs, slowly pushing his cock inside of you. âThe noises you make with my cock buried inside you are such a prize. Itâd be a disservice to not share.â
A sharp whine leaves your lips as he tugs on your hair, tilting your head to give himself better access to your neck as he bottoms out inside of you. âTell him what youâre up to, sweetie,â he simply says, sucking a faint mark onto your neck.
On the other end of the line, your partner begins to blab on about his day, though youâre hardly able to listen, not when Sylus is pushing his cock inside of you like a madman. Your body tenses as he stretches you out, the sensation forcing a moan out of your mouth, though the man on the other end of the line didnât seem to notice.
âThatâs it, baby,â he whispers, resting his chin on the crook of your shoulder to press an open-mouthed kiss to your jaw, âtaking my cock so nicely. Missed this pussy so much.â
ââso then, I told him⊠wait. Are you with someone?â
Your heart rate skyrockets as Sylus draws his hips back only to pound the length of his cock inside of you. âOh, fuck⊠y-yes,â you choke into the phone, almost breathless.
âThank you for your confession, my dear,â Sylus teasingly remarks, knowing that your response was a reaction to how good he feels inside of you rather than an answer to your boyfriendâs question.
He presses a faint kiss to your shoulder as he thrusts into you again, using his grip on your hair to push you back onto your stomach. A hand smoothes over the curve of your back, his long fingers hooking around the plush of your hip to remind you that heâs still present despite the situation. He then brings the phone to his own ear, watching with a wide grin as you arch your back to take as much of his cock as you can.
âOur friend canât talk right now,â he says into the receiver, grunting as your walls clench around him. âSheâs gotten lost and found herself on my cock, which is such a positive turn of events, let me tell you,â the pace of his hips thrusting into you only seems to get more intense with each word he says, âconsidering itâs right where she belongs.â
âW-what? Who the fuck are you? Iââ
âI canât stay on the line to talk much either,â Sylus continues, his free hand grasping a bit tighter onto your hair as he tugs on it to fuck deeper and harder inside of you, his skin slapping against yours with each heavy thrust. âHave to make her cum for all the times you couldnât.â
Youâre lost in a whirlwind of sensations, your mouth gaped open as you moan out with each thrust he makes, your back arched as much as you could make it. You can feel a pool of warmth building inside of your lower stomach, and you let out a cry of pleasure.
You havenât been fucked this good in, well⊠six months. That much is obvious to the both of you, given the way youâve been losing your mind with each forceful push of his hips. He knows your body in ways youâll never understand, and luckily for you, you donât need to understand in order to receive the pleasure that heâs desperately trying to give you.
âSylus!â you gasp out, serving as a warning for how close you already are.
âMm, I have to go, duty calls,â Sylus says into the phone, releasing his grip on your hair to move his hand between your legs, two of his fingers circling your clit. âCall my woman again and Iâll kill you.â
Tapping the screen to end the call, he tosses your phone mindlessly, and itâs only when you hear it drop against the floor do you turn around to look at him.
âSylus!â you scold.
He gives you a wry smile as he slowly pulls out of you, rolling you onto your back. âIâll buy you a new one, pretty. Donât worry.â
You open your mouth to protest, but when he slowly pushes his cock inside of you again, youâre hardly in the protesting mood at all.
Sylus towers over you, his forearm propping him up as he slowly fucks into you, his red eyes trained to yours. âGod, baby, Iâve missed you.â
Almost instinctively, your hands wrap around his neck, pulling him closer to you. There was a hidden intimacy of this position that youâve always loved. He obliges to your request, resting his forehead on yours as he thrusts harder inside of you.
âYou take me so well,â he whispers, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. âSo, so beautifully.â
You mewl at the softness of his praise, your eyes glossing over as he continues to fuck you into oblivion, your walls tensing around him. He hisses at the feeling, dipping his head to press a kiss on your cheek.
He can tell that youâre close, and he knows just what you need. He wonât give it to you so easily, though.
âSweetie?â he breathes out.
You nod your head before breathlessly replying, âyeah?â
Sylus gives you a smirk as he raises his bruised finger to your lips. âKiss it better. Let me use it on you.â
Protest is not on your agenda anymore, not by a long shot. You kiss the pad of his finger without hesitation, and you proceed to capture it with your mouth, your tongue soothing the bruising.
He smiles at the sight, a groan leaving his lips as he continues to thrust his cock inside of you. âSo pretty, baby. God, youâre beautiful.â
Sylus retracts his finger from your mouth to bring it to your clit, his spit-slick finger rubbing it in beautiful, moan-earning circles. He watches as your eyes almost immediately haze over at the stimulation.
He lowers his head to suck on your nipple, his free hand palming at your other breast as means of stimulating you in any way he can. After a moment, he latches onto your other breast, his tongue swirling around the hardened peak.
âGod, ahâ Sylus!â you moan, your hands wrapping around his neck.
He nips at your breast before he pulls away, a guttural moan leaving his mouth as he feels you clench around his cock. âGoing to come for me again, beautiful?â
You nod your head, rising up from the pillow to press a kiss on his lips, and his large hand moves to cup the back of your head as he kisses you through your orgasm. His fingers gently thread through your hair, giving you the best of both worlds.
âCream my cock, baby. Itâs all yours, always will be,â he mutters against your lips, his thrusts growing slower as he twitches inside of you.
Sylus breaks the kiss to look down at you, a heavy pant leaving him. âWhere do you want me?â he breathlessly asks.
As if that were a question you ever responded differently to, he still needed to ask, even though you answered just the same. âIn⊠in me.â
He nods his head as he thrusts inside of you a few more times, pressing an open-mouthed kiss on your cheek as he bottoms out inside of you, stuffing you full of his thick, white cum.
A moment passes in which the two of you simply pant breathlessly to each other, your sweaty foreheads pressed together. It was a beautiful scene by all measures.
âI missed you too,â you finally pant out, a smile breaking your lips. âI missed you a lot.â
He chuckles breathlessly at that. âI missed you even more, sweetie.â
Sylus presses a soft kiss on your cheek before he slowly pulls out of you, traveling slowly to your bathroom before returning with a damp towel. He settles in front of you again, using the warm towel to gently clean up the mess heâs made of you between your legs.
You stare at him with the most lovestruck eyes heâs ever seen, and it only makes him smile. âYou tired, baby?â he lowly asks.
Nodding your head, you extend your arms to him, and he pulls you in without question. He lies down on his back, holding you against his chest. His large hand runs over your back while the other one tugs your blankets over the both of you, giving you a bit of warmth.
Not that he needed anything more than your presence. He feels like heâs on cloud nine, holding the woman that he loves, running his fingers through her hair just as he used to.
âI love you,â he murmurs into your ear, pressing a soft kiss on the top of your head. Itâs almost concerning how much he loves you, but he canât help it.
âI love you,â you lazily return the sentiment.
As you cuddle into his chest, you canât help but wonder what would have happened if he hadnât shown up today, if heâd left you alone, if he let you move on.
You know itâs crazy to think about.
After all, itâs Sylus. Your Sylus. Heâs the only person youâve ever needed, and now that heâs reminded you of that, you wonât forget it.
note. thank you for reading! please interact if you enjoyed!! <3 i donât even know what the hell this isâwe have possessive, dominant, and soft sylus in one go. but hey, it works for me, so i hope it works for you. pls pls pls give me ideas to write more for this sexy manâi never get tired of him!
â â â â â â â â â ⧠masterlist | request
#â„ïž tojicide#love and deepspace sylus#lnds sylus#sylus x reader#sylus qin#sylus#lads sylus#sylus x you#sylus x y/n#sylus smut#l&ds sylus#love and deepspace#lads#love & deepspace
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Warnings: smut w/o plot, first time, creampie, unprotected p in v
A/N: during his first time with you, Bakugo is caught off guard by the expression you make
MY HERO ACADEMIA MASTERLIST - PART II
Katsuki Bakugo wasnât used to feeling uncertain, and he wasnât sure he liked it. In fact, he hated it. Confidence was a part of him, woven into every fiber of his being, but tonight, as he hovered over you, his cock buried within the warmth and slickness of your tight pussy, his heart racing in tandem with yours, doubt had snuck in like an unwelcome visitor. Fearless and brimming with confidence, the young pro hero who could take on nearly any opponent without breaking a sweat now found himself in uncharted territory.Â
Bakugo had never been this close to someone before. Sure, he'd been in countless fights, bodies colliding in the heat of battle, his skin pressed against opponents in the chaos of combat. But this? This was different - this was intimacy on a level he'd never known. It was raw, vulnerable, and new. His heart pounded, not from adrenaline, but from the weight of the moment. It was his first time, and thankfully, it was with the person he cared for the most, the one he loved with every fiber of his being - Y/N.
You were warm and soft beneath him, your skin flushed and glistening with a fine sheen of sweat as he moved against you with a mix of urgency and care. His breath was ragged, heavy, and every touch of his fingers against your skin seemed to ignite a trail of fire that left you gasping for more. His hands roamed your body, firm but gentle, as if memorizing every curve, every inch of you.Â
His lips brushed your neck, tracing the delicate skin there as you arched into him, your body responding instinctively to every subtle shift in his thrusts. His name escaped your lips, breathless and soft, and the sound of it seemed to fuel him further.
Wet, sloshing sounds filled the room. You were hot down there, your pussy now a frothy heaven for Bakugoâs cock. His dick bumped and rubbed against your insides, reaching places that made you whimper and your lips tremble.Â
Katsuki picked up the pace, and you grabbed his ass and hooked your heels over the back of his massive thighs. His hands, usually rough and calloused, were tentative now, roaming across your hips and thighs with an almost unfamiliar gentleness. "Is this good?" he asked, his usual gruff tone softened by a vulnerability he wasn't used to.
You could only nod, a soft moan escaping your lips as his lips found your neck, teeth grazing your skin in a way that made your entire body shiver. You were already lost in the sensation, but Bakugo was hyper-aware of everything - of how your body moved beneath him, of the rise and fall of your chest, and especially the way your face started to change as the pleasure built between you. His cock was thick, and you moaned whenever your pussy stretched further, trying desperately to accommodate him fully.Â
Bakugo was cautious, almost too much so, taking his time with every touch, every caress. The weight of his inexperience pressed heavily on his shoulders. He sped up as the warm lick of your sweet pussy wet his crown, and your spongy walls hugged his reddened glans in a velvet blanket of softness. Bakugo moved faster, a little harder with every thrust.
You smiled up at him, your breath hitching slightly as his rough fingers slid over your skin. âJust like that, Katsuki, fuck me harder,â you begged, rolling head backwards, resting it on his pillow.
His sharp, crimson eyes studied you, searching for any sign of discomfort. He was fiercely protective, always wanting to do things perfectly, even if it was something as foreign to him as this. He moved with a cautious eagerness, his normally confident demeanor tempered by the weight of wanting to make sure he wasnât hurting you while his rock-hard cock was penetrating your slick vagina.
But then it happened. As he pressed forward, his hips meeting yours in a slow, deliberate rhythm, he noticed something - your face.Â
It started to shift, contorting into something unfamiliar. Your lips parted, eyes fluttering closed as a moan escaped you, but it wasnât the sound that made him freeze.
âWait - wait, whatâs wrong?â Katsuki suddenly stopped, his hands gripping your waist as he pulled back just slightly, the tip of his cock still in your sweet pussy, his heart thudding in his chest.
You opened your eyes, half-lidded and dazed, looking up at him with a dreamy, confused expression. âWhat?â you breathed, your voice thick with desire. âWhy did you stop, Katsy?â
He blinked, completely thrown off by your reaction. âYour faceâŠâ His brows furrowed deeply, voice dropping lower in hesitation. âYou looked like you were in pain.â
You stared at him for a moment, processing what he said. Then, much to his bewilderment, a soft chuckle escaped your lips, your head tipping back onto the pillow. âKatsuki⊠I wasnât in pain,â you assured him, still smiling up at him. âI was- " You hesitated, eyes sparkling with amusement. " -just really close.â
He blinked, clearly confused. âClose to what?â
You bit your lip, a shy smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. âClose to cumming.â
Bakugo's cheeks flushed a deep shade of red. His grip on your hips loosened, and for a moment, the cocky hero was at a loss for words. âTch!â
You laughed softly, leaning up to kiss him gently, your lips brushing against his in a way that made his heart race. âYouâre doing great, Katsuki. Youâre not hurting me. Youâre making me feel really, really good.â
Bakugoâs face flushed a deep crimson, his mind racing as he stared at you. âI think I found your sweet spot.â
âYeah,â you interrupted with a grin, reaching up to brush a strand of his blond hair from his forehead. âI was about to come, and you apparently hit my gspot.â
His eyes widened, mortification flickering across his face. âShitâŠâ he muttered, running a hand through his damp hair in frustration. âI thought I hurt you or something.â
You shook your head, your hand finding his again, giving it a gentle squeeze. âNo, Katsuki. You were perfect.â You couldn't help but smile softly, brushing your thumb across his cheek. âItâs my o-face.â
His brows knitted together in confusion. âWhat the hell is an o-face?â
You laughed softly, your fingers trailing down his arm as you explained. âItâs the face people make when theyâre close to orgasm. Itâs completely normal, trust me.â
Bakugo stared at you for a long moment, the tension in his shoulders slowly easing as your words sunk in. âYouâre sure?â
âIâm sure,â you reassured him with a gentle kiss on his lips. âYou didnât hurt me. Youâre just making me feel so good. Like I would be on cloud nine.â
His face flushed again, but this time with a mixture of pride and embarrassment. âTch! Shouldâve fucking known,â he muttered, trying to play it off, but you could see the relief in his eyes.
He had never been more unsure of himself. Not in training, not in battle, and certainly not here, in this moment, with you.
That look on your face - the way your eyes had rolled back, the way your mouth hung open, the way your tongue slid out of your mouth and lolled like a slug - it stuck with him. He couldn't shake it.Â
He watched it carefully this time, his sharp gaze never leaving your face as his rock-hard dick moved inside you, adapting your plush walls to his shape. The way your breath hitched, the way your body arched beneath his touch - it was the same, but something felt off. Your eyes were wider, almost unnaturally so, and your mouth hung open in a way that unnerved him. It wasnât the same as the night before, and it sent a cold shiver down his spine.
His hands roamed across your body, fingers digging into your flesh just enough to leave a mark. He pressed his hips harder against yours, eliciting a gasp from you as his cock hit just the right spot. He groaned low in his throat, the sound vibrating through your chest as he dipped his head down to bite gently at your neck when your pussy started convulsing all around his dick. âYouâre gonna make that face again, ainât ya?â he muttered against your skin, his voice husky with need.
You nodded, barely able to form coherent words. âKatsuki, please⊠donât stop this timeâŠâ
That was all the encouragement he needed. His pace quickened, each thrust sending you closer to the edge, and this time, when your face began to contort again - your eyes rolling back, mouth falling open - he didnât stop. He relished it. He knew now that he was the one driving you to that peak, and the thought of making you feel that good sent a surge of pride and arousal through him. âFuckâŠâ he muttered under his breath, watching you fall apart beneath him. âYou look so hot like that, babe.â
This time, when your face contorted with pleasure, Bakugo didnât freeze. He kept going, fueled by the knowledge that he wasnât hurting you, but instead giving you exactly what you needed.
âKatsuki-â you gasped, your hands clutching at his shoulders, nails digging into his skin as your climax ripped through you. Your body convulsed beneath him, and this time, he didnât freeze. He kept going, riding out your orgasm as you moaned his name, your voice ragged and breathless.
How own orgasm trembled within him. The pleasure started in his thighs, buzzing up to his tight balls and into his core, then through his shaft. His knob tingled, and his cock swelled, still buried within your dripping pussy. He gasped and fucked you faster, gliding in and out of your soaking wet valley as his body began to shake. Colors and lights soared behind his clenched eyelids.Â
You bucked your pussy against Bakugo, rolling your hips in a sensuous circle as you flooded your crotches with your wet, sticky cum, moaning his name on and on.
The torrent that streamed through his shaft erupted from his reddened tip in one continuous river, filling your vagina as he trembled above your sweated body, lost in the ecstasy of the moment. âFuck, Y/N, Iâm cummingâŠâ
When you both finally came down from the high, your body trembling with aftershocks, Bakugo slowed his movements, his breathing heavy and labored. He looked down at you, his chest heaving as he smirked, clearly satisfied with the result. âFuck. I fucking love the face you make when youâre getting off,â he growled, rubbing his nose against yours as he pulled his flaccid cock out of you, satisfied in more ways than one while watching your mixed releases, a pearly, thick liquid, spilling out of your pussy and dripping down on his sheets.
Bakugo grinned, his cocky demeanor returning in full force. âDamn, thatâs so fucking hot,â he muttered before rolling to the side, pulling you into his arms. âNext time, just warn me if youâre about to make that face again. I donât wanna freak out like an idiot.â
You smiled, snuggling closer to him. âIâll try.
#bakugou smut#katsuki bakugou#bakugo x reader smut#mha bakugou#bakugou x y/n#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugou#mha smut#bnha smut#bakugo smut#bakugo x reader#anime smut#bakugou x you#bakugo katsuki#divider by cafekitsune#smutty fic
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SYSTEM! SHEN YUAN AU
Okay, look, I've head a System SY idea for a while now (in fact, some of the ideas for this were used when I was first planning out Locked & Loaded), but after seeing @/artsarasp's System!SQQ AU, the brainworms have been once again come alive and I just need to get this out into the world. This is a very bare bones idea that I (probably) won't actually write, so walk with me for a second! Also this is going to be a very, very long post.
In this idea, the System actually is an interdimensional organization that deal with creating new worlds based on stories and making sure these worlds continue working as intended and (eventually), sending transmigrators to worlds that need 'improvement' (this improvement being very subjectice depending on which worker is assigned which story).
In SY's case, he's just someone who usually works behing a screen, in the most exciting cases he gets to guide transmigrators around but most of the time he just makes sure the stories 'code' is running normally and nothing world-breaking is going on in the stories (like someone managing to find a hack to skip defining plot points, or activating God-Mode somehow). He's very happy with this arrangement, btw! He was never one to run around and his boss has warned him once or twice for apparently being 'way too harsh' on the few transmigrators he got to be a System for.
Unfortunately, one day he is assigned to 'manually inspect' a world because a certain co-worker of his (Shang Qinghua) had been sent down there to handle a glitch but had gone missing instead. When SY asks why was he being the one asked to do this (not that he doesn't care for his friend, but he REALLY isnt made for running around), his boss says SY is the only other one who is familiar enough with the world to not get lost.
So that's how he find out SQH had managed to get himself stuck on the world he created (as a joke even, he hadn't even expected that when he was messing around with the company's program he would actually be able to create a new world based on the shitty novel he'd written as a human). And of course, SQH only having one friend, subjected SY to the story.
SY grumbles and denies ever seeing anything about SQH's story (or liking it, even if his boss kindly points out they never mentioned SY liked it) but eventually he agrees; and that's how he finds himself being teletransported onto the world of PIDW, carrying a pair of Debugging Sheers he'd never thought he would have to hold (he calls them Big Scissors), with the mission of finding SQH and dealing with the glitch that was still somewhere in the world.
Though, when he goes to message his supervisor about the specifics (where he should go or what was the last known location of SQH), he finds out that his Personal System has apparently already been affected by the glitch ("ALREADY??") that he was realizing worked more like a virus. Fortunately some messages were still going through, and his supervisor notified him they couldn't send him directly to the location he needed to be, specially because the virus seemed to have fragmented and spread to various parts of the stories timeline. SY now has to jump around through time a few times and slowly cut doen the glitches caused by the virus.
Thus begins Shen Yuan's Great Narrative Haunting (in real time.).
Luckily, for him, the place he first appeared was already one of the spots the virus has infected the world, and it seems to be in a town not too far away from him, so with a quick activation of the 'Ghost Mode' function (avaiable for all System staff to make it easier when they have to manually fix something, making them invisible and untouchable), SY heads to the town.
The glitch actually doesnt take too long to find (it was a buggy tree clipping onto a nearby river, which only needs a snip of the Big Scissors to disappear from reality), but when SY and passing through the town to find some better signal for his Personal System so he can jump forward to the next stop, he sees a group of snickering kids leaving an alleyway. A bit curious, he passes by the alley and barely manages to see through the pouring rain and spot a trembling figure on the floor. Of course, PIDW was never meant to be a happy or forgiving world, so SY is not surprised at the idea that some kids were bullying a smaller kid, though it still makes him upset.
He kneels close to the child and turns off 'Ghost Mode', pulling out an umbrella from his inventory (yes, System staff ALSO get an inventory, no one wants to have to carry aroung those big ass scissors), covering him from the rain. The boy is shaking from the cold, and even if SY can't check the boy's identity (since his system is still buggy), he reasons the probability of him coming into contact with an important character is very small, and even if System staff aren't supposed to interact with characters, he limits himself to at least getting the boy out of the rain.
Luo Binghe later wakes in a bench underneath a small shop's roof, covered in a thick cloth, having no idea how he'd gotten there besides the vague dream (or memory?) of a strangely dressed person patting his hair and taking him into their arms. He notices the rain has stopped and he's perfectly dry. Shen Yuan, seeing the kid seems to be doing well, finally jumps to his next location.
It doesn't take long for SY to figure out where he is when he loads onto the next mission location, in fact, he's almost certain he'd recognize the bamboo forest and calm, almost dream-like atmosphere of Qing Jing Peak anywhere. Seeing there that Qing Jing even exists in the first place, he deduces Binghe is still not emperor, so this time he makes sure to not be seen by any characters. It also doesn't take for SY to find his next target, as a commotion behind him catches his attention.
And oh, if he isn't familiar with the scene. A few older looking disciples push around a smaller looking boy, while a girl insistently shouts for the leader of the older disciples to stop. SY barely managed to appreaciate how Luo Binghe looks so cute as a child before (who he assumes is) Ming Fan snatches rips an amulet out of Binghe's neck. It's quite the heartbreaking scene to watch live, poor Binghe fighting for the only remaining piece of his adoptive mother without even knowing he's destined to never see it again. SY's Personal System may be buggy but it's still functional enough to detect if SY has a direct impact on the main storyline, so SY is basically forced to stand still and watch.
Though, since he had a clear view of the whole scene, when Ming Fan throws the jade pendant into the forest, SY can perfectly follow the arch of the necklace and sees where it landed, which is when an idea pops into his head. Distantly hearing Luo Binghe and NYY frantically searching for a necklace they'll never find, SY spots where the fake jade glimmers high up on a tree brench, though it's glimmer is distorted by the distinct sight of a glitch corrupting it's form. If SY were to follow standard procedure, he'd just have to bring out his Sheers and snip the necklace out of existence, but looking at it... Would it be so bad if he debugged the necklace the longer way?
Besides, if Binghe has the necklace or not, it's not like this one item is going to interfere with the major story anyways. SY isn't stopping Binghe from falling into the Abyss, he's just... Returning a lost item to it's intended owner.
Later, after an exhausting afternoon of what seemed to be searching through every nook and cranny of Qing Jing Peak's surrounding forest, Luo Binghe goes back to the shed he sleeps in utterly defeat and feeling strangely hollow; that is, until he opens the door and finds a new, thick blanket neatly folded in the middle of the shed, way too clean to be anything he had previously owned, and atop of it, his precious jade pendent, sitting there as if it never even dissapeared. Luo Binghe distantly notices that nobody that visits the shed ever lets the door closed after they visit.
The third location SY goes to leaves him no time to acclimatize, as he's immediately attacked by a beast, and only after (struggling to) kill it, does SY notice the unfortunate situation he was placed into: the Immortal Alliance Conference. By this point, he's already figured out his Personal System is most likely using Binghe's energy as Protagonist to make up for the energy it can't use due to it being partially corrupted, and the energy it needs to save up so SY can go back to the System's head quarters, so it really wasn't a surprise that he would be sent to this specific plot point, but dammit can't he avoid having to be near the place where his favorite character is thrown into hell??
And, well, there's also the problem that a beast attacked him, which meant it saw him, which meant his Ghost Mode was also glitching out, and after fiddling around which a half functioning System interface, it seems that the presence of the virus here is stronger than the other places, though still not the biggest chunk. Truly, just the cherry on top of his situation that he'd have to scurry around and somehow manage to not bump into anyone.
As is his luck, as SY tries to head closer to where his System is signaling the glitch's presence, other monsters continue attacking him, which besides slowing him down a considerable amount, it also causes the risk of him being picked up by the people watching the Conference through the Spirit Eagles circling the area, which is the last thing he needs.
Eventually he goes to the closest spot he can to the glitch, but a snapping sound behind him sends him into full panic. A person stands behind him, which leaves SY wondering how he managed to miss someone sneaking up on him like this. "You seem to have dropped something." the person says, and SY eyes immediately fall to his body, scanning himself to what he might have lost, and his hand basically flies to his throat when he notices the tassle that is usually nestled there is missing. He quickly turns around, only to come face to face to the golden protagonist, mister Luo Binghe himself.
Binghe tries interrogating SY as to what he's doing, sneaking around the supposedly sealed off Conference grounds, and SY, in his panicked state (slightly fuelled by a fanboy-induced craze) tries to fumble for excuses, but only when Binghe finally understands that the feeling he gets when looking at this strange person is an undeniable sense of deja-vu and tries asking SY if they'd met before, a loud rumblind shakes the ground: the Abyss has opened.
SY feels even more panicked, cause what this means is eventually, not only will he be discovered by Luo Binghe (his supervisor is going to kill him), but he could possibly be discovered by Shen Qingqiu, of all people! He doesn't get too much time to think about his grand escape however, as a piercing shriek comes from the Abyss rift. Right, how could he forget about the Black Moon Rhinoceros Python? And-- Oh, of course! Of course the damn thing would be virus-infected object!
After teaming-up with Binghe, the both of them manage to subdue the monster long enough that SY managed to snip it, though while they both catch their breath, SY belatedly realizes he just helped Binghe fight with the monster he was supposed to fight. Alone! The monster who was supposed to break his demonic seal! And, like clockwork, he can distantly hear what can only be SQQ's hurried steps through the forest! FUCK!!
With no other option, and Binghe now wanting to continue his interrogation, SY hurriedly start to walk towards the Abyss rift, frantically giving Binghe tips about what he could do in the Abyss to have an easier time, though when he catches a glimpse of green robes between the trees, SY types something on a floating screen and jumps backwards, Binghe letting out a shocked scream. Unfortunately, the protagonist won't be able to do nothing about the seemingly insane and way too familiar man who just jumped into the Abyss, as a rustling sounds behind him, and he's met with a newly regenrated Black Moon Rhino.
SY feels horrible about spawning a new one after Binghe just finished fighting one, but the story must continue, and with his Personal System finally free from most of the virus corruption, SY leaves one last gift as an apology and warping away before hitting the Abyss' ground. Later, when Binghe wakes up at the bottom of the rift after being pushed by SQQ, the first thing he sees is a qiakun pouch, full of useful items and tiny note at the bottom that reads 'Sorry!'
Pt.2
Pt.3
#sorry for any typos its literally 1am#this became to huge doe omg#im so sorry i thought i would manage to keep it simple#who am i kidding#when have i ever managed to keep an AU simple#svsss#drabble#fanfic#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#luo bingge#bingqiu#bingyuan#binggeyuan#this is binggeyuan btw#digital art#komm's system au
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The First Son
All the batkids have one common secret they are keeping from Bruce. That is the fact that there is a new vigilante in town. At first they were confused when they heard rumors that the bats had a new member since Bruce hasn't introduced anyone to this guy.
It is only after a little prodding that they realize that the guy they are talking about is just a new vigilante. A good one too. No one has seen him and the only reason they know it's a he is because of his voice. The goons often call him The Phantom.
At first, they were very wary of this new guy. Last thing they need is a new guy who decides to do whatever the hell they want in the city. But no. Phantom doesn't interfere with anyone's works nor does he create chaos whenever he works. The guy operation is smooth and if not for the unconscious bodies sprawled on the ground, no one would even realize he is there.
The first contact they ever had with Phantom is when Phantom gives them a tip of an Arkham breakout in the planning. No one knows how he knows but he just is. His information gathering is better than any of them including Tim and Barbara. They also successfully established a way of contact between them. Whenever any of them need help, they will leave a sticky note on the bat signal and they will receive whatever intel they want the next day. They try to see him by staying right beside the signal and even setting up cameras but none of them works with either the sticky note straight up disappearing or the cameras becoming static with the sticky note getting replaced with the Intel when the static is gone.
And so they go like this for a few more months when suddenly a tip comes up from an unlikely source.
Talia Al-Ghul has informed them that because of desperation Ra's is planning on kidnapping Tim and Damian to use them in a battle against Talia. She has been working to take over the League of Assassin after she gained news of her own father having dark plans against his own son. After the recent fatal blow to her father's faction, in a desperate attempt to defeat her, decides to break his own words and plans to invade Gotham to take Damian as hostage and Tim to become his apprentice.
The batfamily goes on high alert especially since Talia herself is there with her assassins trying to help them. But unfortunately, they underestimate how determine Ra's is. Talia nor the batfamily don't expect that Ra's would be crazy enough to bring his whole faction to invade Gotham.
Tim and Damian are not having a good time. Let it be known that normally, they can easily take down anyone they want to if they work together. Unfortunately, their opponent today is Ra's Al-Ghul himself. If Batman, Cass or even Dick is here, they would easily be able to hold their own against him. But Tim's expertise is detective work while Damian is still young and are at a disadvantage in terms of physical strength and experience.
Everyone is fighting to get backup to Tim but with the Supes out of this world and most other heroes busy with their own works, it is quite hard to deal with the assassins. That is until all the assassins are frozen on the ground. They don't know how or why but the assassins are now fully covered in ice with only their heads out.
A figure forms slowly in front of Ra's as his blade inches slowly towards Tim. A loud metal clanging sounded destroying the silence that has befallen the whole battlefield. In front of them is a man with black hair, blue eyes and very very tall. On his hand is a Khopesh that is directly parrying Ra's katana.
"Hello father."
The voice sends a chill into everyone who hears it. But for the Batkids, they know that voice. That is the same voice that is often heard whenever they try to communicate with Phantom. That means, the guy in front of them is Phantom.
"No no no. Impossible. I killed you by my own hand. There is no way you are here. An imposter. That's what you are."
Ra's says as everyone can feel the tremble and fear in his voice. And for the record the bats and Talia have heard Ra's voice being in fear before but this is different. This is the fear that you showed when you are in front of your natural predators. Your death.
"Indeed. It is a mistake for me to believe that you would love like I used to love you, father. And I loathe myself thinking about it. For the longest time revenge has been on my mind. But some people have helped me in letting go of the past. People who truly see me and treat me like family."
"How? How are you still alive? The Lazarus Pit swallows your body as a sacrifice."
"The Pit does no such thing. When you put me in there, you merely set me free. The Pit claims me as one of her own. And she takes pity on my life and decides to give me a better one. And for that I will be eternally grateful to her."
In a fit of madness, Ra's swings his sword towards Phantom. He doesn't want to hear any of it anymore. He needs to kill Phantom now. Before he-
A kick sends him flying across the rooftop towards the other side. Ra's roll on the ground growling in pain. That kick specifically aims to give me the most pain without damaging his body in the slightest. A feat that can easily be done by a very skilled martial artist.
Phantom picks up Tim and Damian that is still on the ground. With Damian fully unconscious and Tim barely conscious, Phantom sends them to the ground using what the other thought to be some form of telekinesis. They slowly pick Tim and Damian and after making sure Tim and Damian aren't in imminent danger, they try to make contact with Phantom, when a dome of ice erected from the ground surrounding both Phantom and Ra's.
Phantom holds his sword in by his side and slowly walks towards Ra's.
"My name is Danyal Al-Ghul. The first son of Ra's Al-Ghul. Today, I am here to formally challenge Ra's Al-Ghul to a death match on account of the continuation of the unsolved battle 500 years ago. All the members of the league are to be witnesses of this battle."
That sentence sends dread to everyone present. Talia knows of this tradition. A tradition that is used by her father to take down any opposition to his rule. That's why she has never confronted his father head on. She is not confident that she can win against him.
Ra's knows that he can't hide any longer. Last time he wins is barely because of an ambush and Danyal was poisoned. He would have never won otherwise.
Usually, Ra's prided himself in being a warrior. Who will dare to look death in the eyes to challenge it to battle. But people that are close to him knows that he is a coward. A coward that is so scared of death, who will do anything to run against it. But now, he can no longer run. Death has finally made his way towards his doorstep. Death in the form of his first son. The very son who he killed because of a prophecy he heard from a seer.
'You shall die a worthless death. At the hand of your greatest creation. He will be your end. The one who will put out your flames of life. Your first son.'
He has been enraged when the seer says that. He killed the old woman and even prepared a plan to kill his own son. The son that trusted him. He first sends him on a big mission where he knew Danyal would never fail. Then he makes a grand celebration when he returns. That's when he poisoned him, reducing his strength to barely a tenth of his full strength.
Even then, Danyal had put up a tough fight. Claiming Ra's hand while fighting him. He thought that he succeeded when life left his son's body. But he is greedy. He tries to awaken him again to make him into his perfect warrior. But the Lazarus Pit swallows him. Leaving no trace behind.
For the longest time, Ra's hid the existence of this son. He is his greatest creation. He is also his greatest shame.
Danyal walks slowly towards Ra's. The others are trying to crack open his ice dome but unless he wills it, even the sun can't melt his ice. Ra's is kneeling right there. Seemingly given up any chance of retaliation. Both of them knew that Danyal is the superior one between the two. Either intellect or strength. Danyal has and will always be better.
Putting the sword on his neck, Danyal asks him. "Any last words father?"
Ra's looks at him with an empty eyes that suddenly gains light as he thrust his katana straight into Danyal's chest. Ra's is about to laugh in victory as he thinks he has outsmarted his son again but then he realizes that his son is still standing there with his sword on his neck.
"Goodbye father." And with that, Ra's head flies into the sky and falls on the floor. Danyal can hear the screaming and shouting from the outside but he doesn't care. He has done it. His long forgotten revenge. His blood feud.
He looks at his father's corpse and burns it to ashes. He has made sure that the old man's soul has completely dispersed after the soul of people he kills unjustly has taken him apart one by one. What a gruesome death. Appropriate for such a vile human.
Danyal looks at people he can consider friends. He could see worry and Nightwing's and Spoiler's eyes, respect in Red Hood mannerism and confusion in Black Bat's body language. He has made sure no one sees Ra's body when he kills him since he knows some of them can read body language too well.
Looking at Talia, his sister, Danyal gives a nod, disperse the ice and disappears. Talia later takes control of all the assassins and they return back to their base after a quick talk with Batman. They heard the conversation from inside the dome. So they knew a little about what was happening.
After that night, Phantom completely disappears without any trace whatsoever.
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#can't stop thinking about this #i hate to say it but in general i'm leaning towards the luthor point of view here? i'm all for eyes being wide open #that said i feel neither pov is wrong #the kents have their reasons to believe the way they do and so do the luthors #it's just interesting when the differences between the families are brought into the spotlight #i feel that's when the show was at its strongest #it lost a lot when it became all about love triangles instead of this (via @raelis1)
100% agree and also this is why I claim 'eyes open' by taylor swift as a lex song:
#smallville#lex luthor#clark kent#sv meta#the fact that the luthors live in 'a cruel world where everybody stands and keeps score' is literally why lionel tells lex to open his eyes#'you'll never get anywhere with your eyes closed'#now lionel's perspective is mostly about wanting to gain power in their corporate dog-eat-dog world#but for lex keeping his eyes open is actually a necessity for his survival#because despite the luthors' wealth lex's life is actually incredibly unsafe#around every corner there's someone just waiting to betray and kill himâincluding his own fucking father#('everybody's waiting for you to break down / everybody's watching to see the fallout')#so he can't just 'accept miracles' the way the kents do#the way the kents HAD TOâwhen a baby fell out of the sky with no explanation ever given to them and they still accepted him as theirs#unlike the kents lex can't just blindly put his faith and trust in things working out for the bestâbecause for him they never do#('every lesson forms a new scar / they never thought you'd make it this far')#that's why he can't let the car crash goâthere has to be some kind of trick to it because good things don't just *happen* to him. ever.#and until clark came along there was nobody out there protecting him ('and nobody comes to save you now') so he had to keep himself safe#speaking of clark... his abilities obviously come with their own issues but let's face itâhe has godlike powers that no one else does#he can 'see anything' effortlessly#something that lex will never be able to do no matter how hard he tries ('two steps ahead and staying on guard')#this is why it's necessary for clark to 'learn to close his eyes'âhe doesn't want to be a god. he wants to be human and normal#so closing his eyes is his way of leveling the playing field so he can stay humble and grounded and feel like he belongs on earth#in conclusion: lex and clark keeping their eyes open and closed respectively are necessary adaptations#which have allowed both of them to survive in their day-to-day lives thus far#but at the same time character growth would involve both of them learning to be more flexible with these coping mechanisms#lex looking over his shoulder less and accepting that some things might just be unknowable so he can keep good people (clark) in his life#and clark embracing his powers and heritage instead of wishing for normalcy so he can eventually become the superman he's meant to be#...anyway I wasn't planning to write a goddamn TED talk but thanks for coming to it I guess đ©
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Closer to Home
Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Synopsis: As you settle into your new role as the teamâs âgirl in the chair,â helping Sam and Bucky with their missions, you find yourself increasingly drawn to Bucky's intense presence. His brooding silence is matched only by his watchful eyes, and despite his gruff exterior, your kindness begins to chip away at his walls. When Bucky insists on walking you home one night, clyou chalk it up to his old-fashioned sense of duty and think nothing of it. But as the night unfolds, you realize thereâs far more behind his actions than just good manners, and your growing feelings for him may not be as hidden as you think.
A/N: This was supposed to be something else ENTIRELY. But it just unravelled and here we are! Please, feel free to let me know your thoughts about it! B xx
--
Your relationship with Bucky hadnât started with fireworks or dramatic confessionsâit began like any other normal relationship: after drinks and a movie.
It was a quiet evening, the kind that felt heavier after long hours at your desk. You were finally wrapping up for the night, shrugging on your coat and slinging your purse over a shoulder. The clock had just ticked past 10 p.m., though it hardly felt late to you. Still, your shoulders sagged under the tension of the dayâhours spent poring over intel, trying to uncover scraps of information that might help Sam and Bucky on their next mission.
âYou shouldnât be walking home alone.â
You looked up to find Bucky leaning casually against the doorway, arms crossed. His voice was gruff but not unkind, his blue eyes shadowed but steady.
âItâs just a few blocks,â you replied, already bracing for the argument.
His jaw tightenedâa subtle shift, but one youâd come to recognize as the start of his infamous stubborn streak. âDoesnât matter. My ma would haunt me if I let you.â
That earned him a laugh. âYour 'ma' sounds like quite the character.â
âShe was,â he said, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. It disappeared as quickly as it came. âCâmon, grab your stuff. Iâll walk you.â
You didnât argue further, mostly because you were too tired to win, and partly because there was something oddly comforting about his protectiveness, even if it came wrapped in brooding silences and sharp glances.
Being around Bucky had taken some getting used to. You knew about him, of courseâwho didnât? But nothing had prepared you for the sheer intensity of James Buchanan Barnes up close. His unrelenting stares, his quiet presence that somehow filled a room, and the way he seemed to carry the weight of entire worlds on his shoulders.
When youâd first joined their team as the âgirl in the chairâ (a term Sam insisted on despite your repeated protests that you were, in fact, a woman), you hadnât known what to expect. Your days as a research journalist had been left behind in favor of a role that felt more like a sidekick to two superheroes. Never the hero, always the support.
âItâs not nothing, though,â Sam had told you once, catching you mid-eye-roll during a particularly grueling debrief. âYouâre saving lives too, yâknow. Every name, every address you dig up? Thatâs someone elseâs tomorrow youâre protecting.â
Still, the job came with its own toll: exhaustion, migraines, and a constant ache in your wrists from hours of typing. But it also came with a quiet sense of purposeâand Buckyâs occasional company.
At first, his silences had been intimidating, his brooding presence almost oppressive. But you met him with unwavering kindnessâbringing him coffee when he looked like he needed it, or letting him retreat into your office to escape Samâs chatter. Slowly, the silences grew shorter, and the stares softened into something more watchful.
Now, walking beside him under the soft glow of streetlights, the quiet felt less like distance and more like understanding.
âSo,â you said, breaking the silence, âis this a one-time chivalry thing, or do I get an official escort service from now on?â
Bucky snorted. âYouâre assuming Iâm doing this for you.â
âOh, really?â you teased, grinning. âWho else is benefitting from my safe arrival home?â
He glanced at you, a spark of humor flickering in his eyes. âSamâll never let me hear the end of it if something happens to you. Man loves his lectures.â
âAh,â you said, mock-serious. âSo Iâm saving you from Samâs wrath. Got it.â
He didnât answer right away, but his pace slowed slightly, his hand brushing the base of your spine as you turned a corner, like he was directing towards home. âMaybe I just like making sure youâre okay,â he muttered.
Your heart stuttered at his words, a quiet ache blooming in your chest, but you didnât dare press him further. Hope was a dangerous thing, a fragile spark that had burned you one too many times before. It was safer to tuck it away, to pretend his words meant nothing more than what heâd saidâa simple gesture of kindness, nothing deeper.
You were friends, after all... right? Or at least, friendly. He was kind to you, yes, but Bucky Barnes was kind in a way that felt carefully measured, like a soldier fulfilling his duty. He was a gentleman through and through, the kind whoâd been raised to believe it was his responsibility to make sure no lady faced the dangers of the night alone.
âHis mah wouldâve expected nothing less,â you thought wryly, your lips tugging into a faint smile.
He was a man out of time, after all. Decades removed from the era he was born into, yet somehow still anchored there, even now. You wouldnât have been surprised if the rules he followed were the same ones ingrained into him all those years ago. And maybe, just maybe, it was easier to believe that than to let yourself hope he cared for any reason beyond habit or honor.
âAlmost there,â he said, his voice breaking through your thoughts. His hand hovered near your elbow, steady and sure, as if ready to catch you should you stumble.
The steps to your door loomed far too quickly for your aching heart, bringing an abrupt end to your time with the brooding soldier. Each step felt heavier than the last, as if your body was reluctant to leave his quiet, steady presence.
You paused on the final step, its height almost eliminating the difference between you and Bucky. It gave you just enough courage to look up at him, your fingers nervously twisting around the strap of your purse.
âThank you, Bucky,â you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper.
He dipped his head in a single nod, his icy blue eyes flickering down to meet yours. His expression, as always, was unreadable, cast in shadows under the dim streetlamp. âAnytime.â
The simplicity of his reply made your chest tighten. You nodded in return, swallowing hard as your heart hammered in your throat. Turning away from him, you fixed your gaze on your front door, willing yourself to move forward, to end the moment before it unraveled you completely.
Friends. Thatâs all this was. It had to be.
So why did it feel so wrong to turn your back on him? Why did it feel like you were forcing yourself to betray something deeper, something unspoken, simply by walking away?
Your hand was on the doorknob before you realized youâd stopped moving, the quiet war between your heart and your mind reaching a fever pitch. You squeezed your eyes shut, battling the urge that rose in you like a wave.
Donât do it. Just go inside. Let him leave.
But the battle was already lost. Before you could stop yourselfâbefore logic could wrestle control away from the reckless beating of your heartâyou turned. Your feet moved without permission, carrying you back down the steps toward him.
It wasnât a decision so much as a pull, steady and undeniable, the words slipping from your lips as if carried on a tide of longing you couldnât resist.
âWould you like to come up for a drink?â
The words tumbled out unbidden, your voice trembling just enough to betray how desperately you wanted him to say yes.
His reaction couldnât have been more Bucky if he tried. His eyes shifted, and you swore you could see every emotion flash through themâsurprise, hesitation, something a lot like longingâbefore they settled back into the stoic mask he always wore. Quiet. Unimpressed. Broody. And yetâŠ
âI wouldnât mind a beer.â
A laugh bubbled up in your chest, shaky with relief, and you motioned toward your door. âWell, come on then. Iâve got a six-pack thatâs been waiting for some company.â
His presence filled the small apartment in a way that made your breath catch, the air somehow heavier, more electric. How many times had your silly, stubborn heart conjured up this exact scenario? Late at night, Bucky standing just inside your door, peeling off his worn leather jacket and tugging off the gloves that shielded both metal and flesh. Then, as if heâd done it a thousand times, heâd settle into a corner of your couch, legs spread, shoulders sinking back into the soft fabric like he belonged there.
âThere's Heineken, Bud, and Corona,â you said, your voice only slightly betraying your nerves as you toed off your shoes and dropped your keys and purse by the door. âI think I might even have some whiskey stashed away somewhere. Whatâs your poison?â
He hesitated for a moment, his gaze trailing lazily around the room before settling back on you. âIâll have what youâre having.â
Your stomach flipped, and you nodded, biting back the grin threatening to stretch across your face. âSure thing,â you said casually, though you were certain the flush creeping up your neck gave you away.
You turned toward the kitchen, your heart doing an embarrassing little leap as you busied yourself rummaging through the fridge and cabinets. The clink of bottles felt absurdly loud in the quiet apartment, every moment stretching with the weight of his presence just beyond your line of sight.
âNice place,â he called from the living room, his tone casual but laced with something warmer.
âThanks,â you replied, grabbing two beers and popping the caps off with practiced ease. âIâd say make yourself at home, but it looks like youâve already got that covered.â
When you re-entered the room, there he wasâexactly as youâd imagined so many times before. His jacket was draped over the back of the couch, his gloves neatly set beside it, and Bucky himself sprawled out comfortably. His metal hand rested casually on his knee, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips as his eyes met yours.
âHere you go, Mr. Barnes,â you said, forcing a steady smile as you handed him the green bottle.
âTo your first visit,â you began, raising your own bottle in a toast. You couldnât help the way your gaze lingered, taking in the sight of his broad frame on your couch, the casual way he sat, the sheer presence of him filling the space. Warmth pooled low in your belly, and before you could stop yourself, you added, âMay it be the first of many.â
His smirk deepened at that, a flicker of amusement flashing across his features. He raised his bottle silently, going for a sipâbut you stopped him, your hand darting out to rest on his.
âWait!â you blurted, your palm lightly pressing against his larger one.
His frown was slight, his gaze shifting between your hands before settling on your face. âWhy?â
âYou have to look at me when we cheers,â you explained, your voice a little breathless, a little unsure of what you were doing but too far in to back out now.
His brow arched. âAnd whyâs that?â
âBad luck if you donât. Years of it.â You shrugged, suddenly feeling the ridiculousness of your own words but refusing to back down. âI mean, I canât even count how many years... Probably best not to risk it.â
For a second, you thought he might argue. But then he chuckled, a soft sound that sent a flutter straight to your chest. âGod knows Iâve had enough of that already, havenât I?â
You giggled, your laughter bubbling out, light and carefree. The fact that he played along felt like a victory, a small but monumental crack in his stoic armor.
With a glint of something softer in his eyes, he tilted his head toward you, his gaze locking with yours. âAlright, doll,â he said, his voice quieter now, warmer. âLetâs do it properly.â
Eyes steady on yours, he clinked his bottle against yours, the sound sharp and satisfying in the quiet room. And then, he didnât look awayânot for a secondâas he took a slow sip.
You followed suit, the contact between your eyes and his making your heart race so fast you thought it might burst. The heat in his gaze was steady, grounding, and yet it sent a thrilling, electric charge through you that made your knees nearly buckle.
âBetter?â he asked, his voice low, the faintest curve to his lips as he lowered his bottle.
âMuch,â you replied, somehow managing to keep your voice steady, even as your pulse thundered in your ears.
The air between you seemed to shift then, heavier but no less comfortingâa new tension that simmered beneath the surface. If Bucky noticed the way your gaze lingered on him, the way your breath hitched every time his hand grazed your knee as he reached for another beer, he never said a thing.
He was the perfect gentleman, as always. Even when you slid closer on the couch, settling beside him on the plush cushions - even though there were a whole three other seats available to you. Even when you turned toward him, resting your head on your palm, your eyes tracing the strong lines of his face while you rambled about the mission reports piling up on your desk. He didnât even glance at your neckline when you leaned over him to grab the remote, though you couldnât help but steal a quiet inhale of his scentâclean, warm, unmistakably him.
âAlright,â you said, breaking the quiet. âI feel like Iâm torturing you by making you listen to all this. Do you feel like watching something?â Your tone was cheery, light, but your heart raced at the thought of sharing something as simple and intimate as watching a film together.
With your eyes fixed on the TV, you missed the brief hesitation in his expressionâthe flicker of doubt that crossed his face and quickly vanished. Yet, neither the guilt, the fear, nor the pain that lingered in his soul seemed strong enough to stop him from embracing what you offered so openly: a chance to simply be. For the first time in what felt like forever, Bucky seemed just a little less burdened by the shadows of his past, a ghost of his old self and a lot of his new one urging him to give in.
âWhatâs on Netflix?â he asked, his voice low and casual.
Your head whipped around so quickly you nearly gave yourself whiplash. âHow do you know what Netflix is?â
His lips quirked into a rare, genuinely amused smile, the kind that made your stomach flip. âIâm old, but Iâm not that old, doll.â
âYouâre 106,â you shot back, arching a brow.
âAnd yet, I still know what streaming is,â he countered, the smile growing. âIâm not living under a rock.â
âWell, I am impressed, Mr. Barnes,â you teased, settling back into the cushions. âWhat else do you know about modern technology? Please tell me youâve at least heard of TikTok.â
His expression shifted into something closer to a scowl, but the playful glint in his eye betrayed him. âI know about TikTok,â he said, sounding almost offended. âAnd dating apps. God, the horrors,â he added, shaking his head dramatically as he glanced at his phone like it was some sort of ancient relic.
You couldnât help but laugh, the sound warm and genuine, filling the cozy space between you. But beneath the humor, your stomach twisted with an unexpected knot. Dating apps?
âWhat about dating apps?â you asked, trying to sound casual, but the curiosity in your voice was hard to hide.
Bucky groaned, slouching deeper into the couch as though the thought of them physically pained him. âI donât know, doll. They just seem... unnatural. All these profiles and swiping left or right, like youâre picking a product instead of a person. Not my thing.â His voice held a certain distaste, and the casual way he said it made you wonder if he was speaking from experienceâor just his own strong sense of principle.
You bit your lip, trying to suppress the questions bubbling up inside you. Had he ever used them? Was he speaking from personal experience, or just from watching the chaos unfold around him? Your thoughts shifted uncomfortably, and you tried to steer the conversation back to safer waters.
âI get it,â you said, trying to sound nonchalant. âItâs... kind of weird, honestly. Itâs like shopping for a date, but with less... quality control.â You shot him a teasing grin, but the tightness in your chest was hard to ignore.
Bucky chuckled, the sound a low rumble that was soothing, even though it didnât quite reach his eyes. âExactly. I mean, if Iâm gonna meet someone, Iâd rather it be... I donât know, real? Not behind a screen.â
For some reason, his comment made your heart stumble, a traitorous beat skipping out of rhythm. You quickly dropped your gaze to your beer, hoping the reaction wasnât written all over your face. Was he hinting that he preferred real, in-person connections? That heâd rather... meet someone like that?
You cleared your throat, feigning casual interest to mask the swarm of uncertainty rising inside. âSo, how would you go about it? Finding a date, I mean. Is Sam your wingman?â
Bucky nearly choked on his beer, shaking his head vehemently. âGod, no! Can you imagine? Heâs too busy being Captain America to care about my love life... except when heâs accusing me of flirting with his sister.â
The corner of his mouth lifted into a smirk, and your chest tightened with something sharp and unwelcome. Jealousy. You bit down on your bottom lip, trying to chase it away. âI didnât know you liked Sarah,â you said, and to your horror, the disappointment in your voice was impossible to hide.
Bucky raised an eyebrow, clearly catching the shift in your tone. âSheâs great,â he said with a thoughtful nod. Then his lips curved knowingly. âBut not like that.â
The heat crawling up your neck to your cheeks was impossible to ignore, and Buckyâs sly grin told you heâd noticed. Your relief collided with your curiosity, the two tangling into a dangerous need to know more. âOh,â you started hesitantly. âSo... if not her, then who?â
He took another sip of his beer, the pause deliberate. âHad one date with the waitress from that Asian place we always order from. It⊠didnât go well.â
Your brows furrowed. âAnd you havenât tried again since then?â
âNot really.â He shrugged, leaning back in his chair, the movement deceptively casual. âYou know how it is these daysâapps, algorithms, everyone judging you by a couple of photos and a bio. And whoâs lining up to date a former assassin, huh? People know too much, too soon. Real connections donât happen that way.â
The self-deprecating edge in his voice made your heart ache. You tilted your head, studying the way his vibranium fingers tapped lightly against the beer bottle. âMaybe,â you said softly, your voice steady despite the nervous thrum beneath your skin, âyouâre looking in the wrong places.â
His gaze snapped to yours, sharp and searching. âOh yeah?â he asked, voice low, almost daring. âAnd where do you think I should look?â
You swallowed hard, feeling the weight of his question, his attention. âMaybe a little closer to home,â you murmured, eyes resolutely fixed on the beer bottle in your own hands.
The silence that followed was electric, charged with unspoken possibilities that hung in the air like static. His gaze lingered on you, steady and intense, and you could feel it even without looking up. It made your pulse race in a way you didnât dare acknowledge.
The truth was, you werenât sure if you were just caught up in the momentâor if there was something more lingering in his words, in the way he was looking at you now.
You wanted to ask. The question burned on the tip of your tongue, begging to be spoken. But a part of you hesitated, afraid of the answer. What if this was nothing more than friendly banter? What if pushing further shattered the comfortable connection youâd built?
âCloser to home, huh?â Buckyâs voice was a low rumble, breaking the silence but not the tension. He leaned forward slightly, resting his elbows on his knees, and for a moment, it felt like he was closing the space between you. âAnd what does that mean, exactly? You got someone in mind for me, doll?â
There it wasâthat nickname. The one you pretended to hate but secretly adored. It sent a shiver down your spine, and you could feel the corner of your mouth twitch, betraying the smile you tried to suppress. His voice was so close it warmed you from head to toe. âIâm just saying,â you replied, forcing your tone to stay neutral, âmaybe youâre overthinking it. Sometimes the best things are right in front of you.â
His lips quirked, his expression softening as if heâd caught onto something unsaid. âYou think so?â Bucky asked, his voice quieter now, almost thoughtful.
You dared to turn your head and glance at him, and the way his blue eyes locked onto yours stole whatever breath you had left. âYeah,â you said, your voice barely more than a whisper. âI know so.â
The moment stretched between you, fragile and heavy with unspoken words. You swore he was leaning closer, his gaze flickering briefly to your lips before returning to your eyes. And suddenly, the question burning in your chest felt inevitable.
âBuckyâŠâ you began, voice trembling slightly, unsure of what you were about to sayâor what he might say back.
âYeah, doll?â Buckyâs voice was gentle, a thread of warmth in the charged air between you.
You hesitated, but the weight of your emotions was too much to carry any longer. âIs this a date?â you finally blurted, the words tumbling out before you could second-guess yourself.
For a moment, his expression didnât change, and then he shook his head slowly. âItâs not,â he said, his voice steady but quiet.
Your chest tightened, and the disappointment hit hard, like a blow you hadnât braced for. You tried to mask it, but your face betrayed you, your shoulders sagging under the weight of the rejection. The ache in your heart grew with every second of silence that followed, the room feeling colder with each passing beat.
What you missed was the storm raging behind his steel-blue eyesâthe internal battle he fought against his demons, the ones that screamed he wasnât good enough for you. Wasnât good enough for anyone. Heâd carried those ghosts for too long to ignore them now. But he wasnât blind.
Heâd noticed the way your smile softened when it was meant for him, brighter and warmer than it ever was for anyone else. Heâd seen how you fretted over him after missions, your hands fluttering with concern even at the smallest scratch on his skin. And heâd felt the hope radiating from you tonight when youâd invited him over, your words laced with a vulnerability you rarely showed.
Bucky knew. Heâd known for a while. And that knowledge both terrified and thrilled him. Love, in any form, was fragileâheâd learned that the hard way. But tonight, sitting here with you, he realized he couldnât keep running from the possibility of it.
He wanted you. Your laughter, your kindness, your stubbornness, your touch. He craved all of it. And maybe he didnât deserve it, but for once in his long life, he wanted to try.
Bucky set his beer down, his movements deliberate, and leaned closer. His flesh hand brushed against the back of your arm and the touch sent a shiver up your arm.Â
âItâs not a date,â he repeated, voice low but filled with a quiet resolve that made your breath catch, hurt twisting at your heart.
Your brow furrowed, the downturn of your lips impossible to hide. âHeard you the first timeâŠâ
âThis isnât a date,â he pressed on. Then, with a small, almost shy smile, he added, âBut it could be.â
Your heart skipped, his words hanging in the air like a lifeline. âBuckyâŠâ
Cutting through your hesitation, his gaze locked onto yours, unflinching, steady. âIf you want this⊠if you want me, Iâm yours. I want to try.â
The vulnerability in his voice left you breathless, stealing any coherent thought you might have had. For the first time in what felt like forever, hope blossomed in your chest, warm and radiant. You didnât hesitate this time, your lips curving into a soft, trembling smile.
âIs this because youâre afraid of the apps?â you teased, the quip breaking the intensity just enough for you to breathe. But your voice wavered slightly, and your eyes glistened with the tears threatening to spill. âArenât you afraid Iâll steal your virtue?â
Bucky chuckled, low and genuine, the sound sending warmth curling in your chest. âIâm not a damsel in distress, doll,â he said, his tone playful as his fingers brushed a strand of hair away from your face. The simple touch sent shivers down your spine, and you leaned into it instinctively.
âAnd youâre also not the big bad wolf you think you are,â you countered softly, your voice tinged with both affection and defiance.
âWell, technicallyâŠâ His lips quirked into a lopsided grin. âI am the White Wolf.â
You rolled your eyes, the tension breaking into something lighter, something safe. âHe jokes,â you said, shaking your head. âHe could be kissing insteadâŠâ
His grin softened, and for a beat, he just looked at you, his hand still lingering near your face. Then, as if your words had given him permission, he leaned in, closing the space between you in a way that felt both inevitable and extraordinary.
âGuess Iâll take your advice for once, doll,â he murmured, his breath brushing against your lips.
The moment his lips touched yours, the world seemed to shrink to just the two of you. His kiss was gentle at first, a question rather than an assumption, as though he wanted to be sure this was what you truly wanted. His warm hand cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing softly against your cheekbone, while his vibranium hand rested lightly on your knee, grounding him in the moment.
You sighed into the kiss, your hand instinctively reaching up to thread through the short hair at the nape of his neck. The movement drew him closer, and he obliged, deepening the kiss with a soft groan that sent a shiver down your spine. His lips were soft yet firm, moving against yours in a way that spoke of patience and restrained hunger, like he was savoring every second of this moment.
His vibranium hand finally moved, finding your waist with surprising tenderness. The cool metal was a stark contrast to the heat of his other hand through the fabric of your shirt, but it pulled you to the reality of himâboth the man he was and the one heâd fought so hard to become.
When you parted briefly for air, his forehead rested against yours, his breaths mingling with yours in the small space between you. His eyes fluttered open, heavy-lidded and brimming with emotions he didnât have to say out loud.
âDollâŠâ he whispered, his voice rough and full of awe, like he couldnât quite believe what had just happened.
But you werenât done. You werenât ready to let the moment slip away. Sliding your hand from his neck to his jaw, you tilted his face back toward yours, brushing your lips against his again, slower this time, savoring the taste of him. He responded immediately, his grip on your waist tightening as his mouth moved against yours with more certainty, more passion.
The kiss deepened, growing warmer, more insistent. Your bodies angled closer together, his presence consuming your senses. You could feel his heartbeat against yours, steady and strong, and the faint rasp of his stubble as it brushed against your skin only made the experience more intoxicating.
You werenât sure how it happenedâone moment you were pressed against the back of your couch, his hands and lips demanding your full attention, and the next, you were straddling his thighs. Your arms wrapped tightly around his neck as your harsh breaths mingled, the taste of his tongue intoxicating and impossible to resist.
For all his claims of being a man out of his time, Bucky Barnes knew exactly how to touch a woman. His hands were a perfect dichotomy: one warm and strong, the other cool and unyielding, but both equally firm and commanding. His touch left no room for doubt or hesitation, responding to every unspoken plea you hadnât yet found the words for.
And his kiss? God, his kiss. You could write sonnets about the way his lips moved against yours, the way his tongue teased and claimed you, coaxing a need from you that you hadnât known you were capable of. None of your wildest fantasies could compare to the reality of him, his body pressed against yours, solid and capable. The things it could doâwhat it was doing, what it promised to doâset your whole body alight with yearning.
You kissed him harder, deeper, needier, your hips moving instinctively against his. His groan rumbled low in his chest, a sound that only made you crave him more. But just as your movements grew more desperate, his vibranium hand clamped firmly on your hips, halting your rhythm. His flesh hand cupped your jaw, gentle but insistent, forcing you to break the kiss.
âDollâŠâ His voice was rough, laced with a warning that sent a delicious shiver down your spine.
You blinked at him, still dazed, heat crawling under your skin as you realized what youâd done. âYes, Iâm sorry, I knowâIâm sorry,â you stammered, your cheeks burning with embarrassment.
His breaths came heavy, his chest rising and falling against yours as his steel-blue eyes bore into yours. The hunger there mirrored your own, and the restraint in his grip only made you want him more.
Your lips quirked into a small, teasing smile, your own need warring with the desire to break the tension. âSeems like I really am trying to steal your virtue, huh?â you joked, your voice light but shaky as you turned your head to press a soft kiss to his palm.
His lips twitched, the faintest hint of amusement breaking through the hunger. âYouâre gonna be the death of me,â he muttered, his hand slipping from your jaw to trail gently along your cheek, his thumb brushing over your kiss-swollen lips.
Your free hand wrapped around his vibranium one, your thumb tracing the grooves of the metal. âWouldnât dream of it,â you murmured, your voice soft but laced with promise as you leaned in, resting your forehead against his.
For a moment, neither of you moved, the charged silence stretching as his hands anchored you, holding you steady but never pushing. His restraint was palpable, and you knew without a doubtâif you wanted more, he would give it to you willingly. But only if you asked.
You wouldnât, though. Not tonight.
Instead, you leaned in, brushing soft, sweet kisses against his lips, your movements unhurried and tender. Each kiss felt like a promise, an unspoken assurance that there was no rush, no need for anything more than this moment. It took superhuman strengthâthe kind he hadânot to let it escalate.
When you finally pulled back, both of you were breathless, your lips tingling and your cheeks warm. His eyes searched yours, and the way he looked at youâlike you were the most precious thing in the worldâmade your heart swell. His thumb grazed your cheek, his smile soft and genuine.
âHow about that movie?â he murmured, his voice low and teasing, though his eyes betrayed a depth of emotion that made your breath catch.
You laughed, the sound breaking the last remnants of tension and filling the cozy space around you. âAlright, fine. Letâs find something to watch, then. Any preferences?â
âAnything but those baking shows Sam keeps trying to get me into,â he muttered, his lips quirking in faint exasperation.
A giggle bubbled out of you at the mental image of Sam dragging Bucky into a world of frosting, sprinkles, and delicate pastries. The idea was so absurd yet so perfectly Sam that you couldnât help yourself. Leaning in, you pressed a soft kiss to his jaw, your lips lingering just long enough to feel the faint rasp of stubble. âDeal. No baking shows.â
As the two of you settled back onto the couch, scrolling through movie options, the tension between you shifted againâthis time, it was softer, lighter, wrapped in a warmth that felt safe and steady.
Bucky stretched his arm along the back of the couch, his fingers absently brushing against your shoulder as you leaned into him, your body naturally seeking his. And for the first time in a long time, you noticed something different about him. The shadows that usually haunted his expression seemed to have lifted, replaced by something quieter, something calmer.
Here, with you, Bucky wasnât the broken soldier or the ex-assassin haunted by his past. He was just⊠himself. And in that moment, you realized thatâs all youâd ever wanted him to be.
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