#they had icecream and tv back then why do i never see anyone from that time doing that 🤨

[wishchip106]

hrmm he gets it

beautiful sad man right here

gonna give him a lil goodnight kiss on his forehead

i’m tucking him into bed, reading him a bed time story

i’m turning on the nightlight that puts stars on the ceiling

sigghh sleep well depressed Charles Xavier cause i know i sure will 😁

[tails89]

Fandom: Teen Wolf Word count: 1289 Read on AO3

“You will not believe what just happened to me,” Stiles whines, bursting in through the front door and dropping down onto the couch beside Derek. Kicking off his shoes, he throws his feet up to hang over the armrest and slumps backwards into the cushions.

Derek doesn’t move—just glances around the pages of his book muttering under his breath, “Hey Derek. Nice to see you Derek. Can I come in? Sure Stiles, make yourself at home.”

“Pfft, this isn’t about you,” Stiles grins, flapping his hand at Derek. “Actually-” he sits up suddenly, pulling in his legs to cross them underneath himself. “It is. Do you know what Mrs Davidson said to me today?”

“Let me guess.” Derek throws one arm across the back of the couch. “She said, ‘here comes trouble’?”

“Uh, no.” Stiles rolls his eyes. “She asked me-” He lets his voice go high and reedy in a poor imitation of his elderly neighbour. “’What’s a nice boy like Derek Hale is doing with a boy like you?’ Which, first of all—rude! Second of all, me corrupt you?”

“Yeah, where on earth would she get that idea?” Derek asks, finally giving up on his book and slipping an old receipt into the pages to mark his spot.

“Hey, I am an upstanding young citizen,” Stiles argues, flopping back, his head pillowed against Derek’s thigh. “I am a pillar of this community. I mould the young minds of Beacon Hills.”

Derek barks out a laugh. “Who thought that was a good idea?”

Rolling over onto his stomach, Stiles steadies himself on one elbow and uses the other hand to poke Derek in the leg. “You sir, have everyone one tricked into thinking you’re Mr Deputy Goody-two-shoes, but I know the real you.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, and I know who of the two of us dug up Mrs Davidson’s daffodils, and it wasn’t me.”

“That was an accident and you promised not to bring that up again.”

“Well I’m a lying liar who lies.”

With a quick shove, Derek sends Stiles tumbling onto the floor and stands, moving for the kitchen. “And that’s why your neighbour thinks you’re corrupting me. You staying for dinner?”

“Yup, you making spaghetti?” Stiles asks, following Derek into the kitchen and hopping up onto the counter to watch him start pulling things from the fridge. He swings his legs, knocking his heels against the cabinet doors. “I distinctly remember you promising to make your Dad’s famous spaghetti if I made it through parent-teacher week without murdering anyone.”

*

“What does she even mean by that, anyway?” Stiles asks around a mouthful of pasta, his next forkful hovering halfway to his mouth.

Derek waits, tearing off another slice of garlic bread, for Stiles to explain his logic jump.

“Who?” He prompts, when the explanation never comes.

“Mrs Davidson,” Stiles tells him, like it was an obvious connection to make. “Why does she think we’re together?”

Shrugging, Derek uses his garlic bread to mop up the last of the bolognaise sauce. “We hang out a lot,” he says. “You’re either over here or I’m over at your place. It’s not an unreasonable assumption to make.” He pops the bread into his mouth and reaches for Stiles’ now empty bowl.

“I got it.” Stiles waves him off. “You cooked; I can clean up.” He stands, stacking the empty bowls on top of each other. “I’ll get the icecream if you queue up the next episode of Narcos.”

*

“I’ll be right back,” Stiles says suddenly. “Don’t let the next episode start.”

He disappears from the living room and Derek takes the opportunity to stretch out on the couch. It’s getting late, but the last episode had ended on a cliffhanger so there’s no way they can leave it there.

Reaching for the remote, Derek checks how many episodes are left—three. Tomorrow’s Saturday, so Stiles is off and Derek’s on a late shift so they can probably finish the season before calling it a night.

“You’re in my spot,” Stiles says, shuffling back into the room.

“It’s my couch,” Derek says, making a show of getting comfortable. “I think you’ll find it’s all my spot.”

Stiles slaps jokingly at his legs until Derek lifts them, dropping them down into Stiles’ lap once the human is sitting again.

“You’re such a couch hog,” Stiles complains, but he doesn’t push Derek’s sock-clad feet away. Instead, he stretches out with his own legs up on the coffee table.  “You know, I only come over here when Dad’s on the late shift.”

Derek’s finger hovers over the button on the remote but he doesn’t press play. “I know.” And it’s true, because when the Sheriff is home, Derek’s usually over at the Stilinski house with them.

“I just- do other people think we’re dating?” Stiles asks. “Like is this a widespread thing or is it just my neighbour? Do you think my dad thinks we’re dating?”

“I think you’re overthinking this,” Derek says, nudging Stiles’ leg with his foot. “Can I hit play now?” He doesn’t wait for Stiles to respond and the title card of the next episode flashes up on the TV.

*

“Hey, what time is it?” Stiles mumbles, rubbing his fists into his eyes.

Onscreen, Netflix is playing a trailer for another show, but Derek hits the power button on the remote to shut the TV off. Picking up his cellphone, the bright light almost blinds them both as Derek checks the time.

“Late.”

“Ugh.” Stiles mashes his face into the space between the back of the couch and Derek’s leg. “I’m getting too old for this,” he complains. “I’m feel like an old man— gotta be in bed by nine or face the consequences.”

“And all at the ripe old age of twenty-five,” Derek jokes, shifting to give Stiles more room to faceplant into the cushions.

“You don’t understand.” Stiles looks up. “You and your youthful werewolf body will never know my pain. My knees creak now Der, they creak.” He buries his face again, and Derek only just catches his mumbled. “They tell me when it’s gonna rain.”

“It’s a useful skill,” Derek tells him, laughing when Stiles flips him off.  “Come on, it’s late. You can crash here.” He lets Stiles use the bathroom first, stacking their icecream bowls into the dishwasher while Stiles brushes his teeth.

“Did I leave any clothes here last time?” Stiles asks, sticking his head out of the bedroom door. Jeans don’t make for particularly comfortable pyjamas and it’s too cold to sleep in his boxers.

“Bottom drawer,” Derek calls back over his shoulder.

“Found them.”

Turning off the kitchen light, Derek heads to his bedroom. He’d spent the afternoon lounging around in his sweats so after brushing his teeth he goes straight to bed, climbing into the sheets and rolling over onto his side.

He’s comfortable and warm, drifting right on the precipice of sleep.

“Oh my god!” Stiles lurches upright on the bed, almost elbowing Derek in the gut with his flailing. “We are totally dating.” Even in the dark Derek can see his dumbfounded expression. “How could you not tell me we were dating?”

“Knew you’d figure it out eventually,” Derek mumbles, tangling his fingers in Stiles’ and pulling him back down.

Stiles goes willingly, shifting back so that he’s pressed against Derek’s chest.

“It’s just— all this time we could have been doing… I dunno, boyfriend stuff.”

“We were.”

“Other boyfriend stuff.” Stiles rolls in Derek’s arms so that he’s facing the werewolf. “Like, kissing boyfriend stuff.”

Derek’s laugh is a warm puff that ruffles Stiles’ hair. “We have so much time for ‘boyfriend stuff’” He presses his lips against Stiles’ temple. “In the morning.”

[getmedrugsandbliwjobsorapoptart]

I never got charged with it and I don't remember doing it but I don't remember pulling an airsoft gun on police in Tampa also that was just what I was told. And I passed out watching fear and loathing in Las Vegas write around the jp quick like a bunny scene. I was taking a bunch of various pills as well as drinking a glass jar of moonshine from the;(?) I believe Publix liquor store. Either way I stabbed myself in the leg with a kitchen knife about this size I Left the house and I went down the streets for a walk to chill out I ran into a girl riding a bike and I told her I had some dude with a knife that stabbed me. And I told her to be careful. And I kept going she called the police I assume unless it was my mom either way the police came and. They talked me out of the high emotional state I was in during my episode where I was not high or drunk. I was angry and I don't remember why but I remember my son calling me the orsybe I called him must have been a message I got or saw on Facebook or something it was him singing let it go, let it go from frozen and it broke my heart that is why I was in Florida to begin with to get away from the drugs which is originally why I came to California the first time. Venice was when I came back. Malik punched me in the back of the head on Carson for fucking with his girl or some shit I don't know bro I thought we were dating but fuck you prick. She lied to me when she asked her seizure when I decided to stop and go back home . I had broke up with her then that happened and I got a ride from a limo driver owner guy because they wouldn't let me in the ambulance and we ended up at little company Mary. We kept together when I got back to Nebraska becsause I did need to go back I remember getting back into whatever life I had living in the basement of the house across the street from the one I grew up in. And getting a call that she was back on meth and the rest I won't say. I ended up or was already back on meth I don't remember itust have been after becsue I was used to smoking crank and I got some crystal from IHOP and got my first oil burner I didn't even. Smoke from glass I used foil. It was different sthe other times I had been around crystal I didn't really understand it it would pop on the foil and. It would jump off and get little spots that would hit and burn. Like oil and water on a hot stove. I stayed in my room for a week just smoking meth and trying to hide I and not kill myself. I wanted to so bad and the meth made me at least forget about it at most feel happy and work toward growth but that came after I stopped worrying about what anyone thought of me using it because I did use it to try and kill my self and well as had other people try to kill me for and through using it and I. Still alive but I'm pretty sure I did die when I mixed it woth ambien oraybe it was the pe mushroom night but. That was a bad trip I didn't expect I was trying to get off of the meth and them things I didn't understand like someone going out for icecream broke my heart and li took handfuls of prescription medication and most of it is deadly . So maybe it was theethaybe the prescriptions maybe it doesn't matter what I used to kill myself the fact that all I was doing was trying to get my life back together after it had been destroyed again and then again and again but the Ambien and meth mixtures e I had done at least 20 other times killed me. Well at least I got to walk around with me as I could see me next to me while telling myself jokes and laughing at me Gil Scott Heron was having a convert in my bedroom but I still woke up the next morning with an open container of mint chip icecream on the counter in my kitchen Gil must have been playing from the tv. crystals dancing in the atmosphere clinging to my eyes. Well the lashes I was finally able to handle not having a family. And they all blamed it on me I guess so I must have never wanted one anyway. That sucks. I did my best

[king-finnigan]

14. Bodyguard, and 63. Everyone mistakes them for a couple, geraskier.

Okay, not gonna lie, this one was a bit harder to write a drabble for (mainly because I was torn between canon compliance and modern AU)

***

It had all started when one slightly deranged fan had broken into his house. 

Really, no biggie, he had told himself, when the cops had arrived. Sure, it had been a bit scary, but really, all the girl needed was some psychological help. She meant no harm. So, he had decided not to press charges.

Which had gotten him into a lot of trouble with his manager and dad, who had yelled at him that oh my god, are you stupid, Julian? You could’ve gotten hurt! She won’t be the last, mark my words! 

The conversation (if you could call it that) had ended with his dad resolutely telling him he was going to hire his son a live-in bodyguard who would be by his side 24/7. Jaskier had protested, a lot, really, because what the hell is he supposed to do with a stranger in his house? Who even invented live-in bodyguards? What the hell was that all about?

His dad hadn’t taken no for an answer.

Which had led all the way to now. As Jaskier walks off the stage, he is immediately flanked by said bodyguard, Geralt. 

“Good show,” the guy mutters under his breath, one hand softly pushing against the small of Jaskier’s back, the other stretched out to ward off fans that are getting a little too close to be comfortable.

Jaskier scoffs, when they finally reach the private area of the concert hall. “Don’t lie to me, I know you hate my music.”

“Doesn’t mean it’s a bad show.”

“Alright, alright,” he pushes himself away from Geralt, his back burning in the spot where his bodyguard’s hand had been mere seconds earlier, “that’s enough, you don’t need to guide me as if I’m some lady from the 40′s who’s about to faint, Christ, dude.”

Geralt shrugs. “Just doing my job.”

Jaskier sighs, as he pushes open the door to the side alley, where his driver is waiting for him. Of course, he knows it’s Geralt’s job to make sure he gets to where he needs to be safely, but he also can’t stand the way the guy always looms over him with his big hulking form in a way that makes blood rush to his face and other, much lower parts of his body.

He stops dead in his tracks, halfway between the door and the car. Shit. He’s bloody attracted to the guy. 

Great, way to keep it professional, Jaskier - he tells himself, as he shakes his head and sighs, opening the door of the car, sliding onto the back seat. Geralt, as always, sits next to him, the ride home quiet.

He looks out the window, watching as the lights of the city flit by, smiling as people bustle around the never empty streets of London. He spots the park where he and Geralt had once taken a stroll. His bodyguard had been forced to hold his hand as to make sure he stopped straying away from the path to give anyone who recognized him an autograph. He had also accidentally fallen into the fountain that same day, and Geralt had given him his jacket to make sure he didn’t catch a cold, and he had bought Jaskier icecream after to cheer him up.

He smiles at the memory.

Half a mile later, he sees the bar they had once gotten absolutely hammered in - at least Jaskier had. Geralt had just rolled his eyes, and had eventually picked Jaskier up, carrying him outside over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t give himself alcohol poisoning. He remembers how weirdly comfortable it had been, being carried by Geralt, and how he had whined like a puppy when his bodyguard had put him down.

When he sees the bakery they get bread at every morning, he knows they’ll be home soon.

Really, despite his initial resistance, it had been fairly easy getting used to Geralt’s presence in the house. The guy was a great cook, honestly, and though they had avoided each other at first, they had eventually fallen into a comfortable rhythm, eating all their meals together, watching a movie or tv show on the couch every night, chatting, laughing, getting to know each other.

And he would never admit it to his dad, Geralt, or anyone for that matter, but he’s not so sure he wants to live without Geralt anymore. 

Finally the car stops in front of his- their house- no, his house. There is not ‘their’, there is no ‘them’, it would be completely unprofessional, and Geralt is exactly the kind of guy who is anything but unprofessional. And of course, Jaskier is a bit of a wild child, he’s never going to settle down. 

So why does he feel a pang of disappointment shoot through him as he realizes he and Geralt could never be a thing? Since when does he even consider the possibility of them being a thing? Since when does he want that?

Oh god, he realizes, as he gets out of the car, walking to the front door, acutely aware of Geralt’s presence behind him, I’m in love.

Fuck.

He sighs again, opening the door, letting Geralt in before he closes and locks it again for the night. He honestly, more than anything, would love to take a shower to wash the sweat of the performance off, but his eye is caught by a bunch of magazines lying on the table next to the door. 

Huh. His dad must’ve delivered them earlier that day, judging by the folded note on top of the pile of magazines that reads: “Julian.” His dad is the only one who still calls him that.

He folds the note open, frowning at the single sentence that is written inside. “This needs to stop.”

He cocks his head, laying the note on the table again, picking up the first magazine. On the cover is a picture of him and Geralt, that day in the park. They’re holding hands, and Jaskier frowns at the giddy expression on his own face as he looks up at Geralt, who has a small smile on his face. “Pop sensation Jaskier finally settling down?” it reads next to the picture.

Wait. 

They think Jaskier and Geralt are a couple.

He shrugs, putting the magazine down again. What’s the harm of a few people spreading rumours around? Could be worse.

Except the next magazine has a picture fo him, from that night at the bar, hanging over Geralt’s shoulder, giving the camera a dopey grin. Then, right next to it, a picture of him leaning against Geralt’s arm, once again looking up at the man with an expression that could easily be interpreted as adoration. Once again, Geralt is smiling. 

“Night out with new boyfriend?” it says next to the pictures.

Oh, okay, maybe two magazines are spreading rumours, what’s the problem with that?

Except the pile is at least fifteen magazines thick and Jaskier has a growing suspicion that they all have the same sort of front page. 

His suspicions are confirmed when he looks through the pile. Every single cover is adorned with a picture of him and Geralt, walking hand in hand along the Thames at night, at the bakery a few blocks away picking out pastries together, of Jaskier leaning on Geralt’s shoulder, of them smiling and giving each other looks that could barely be interpreted as anything other than loving.

And each and every magazine thinks they are a couple.

Well, shit.

And what’s even worse is that he wants the rumours to be real. 

He looks up when he feels eyes boring into him, and spots Geralt, now only dressed in a shirt and sweatpants, leaning against the door to the living room, arms crossed. “What’s that?”

Jaskier smiles weakly, holding up one of the magazines for a second. “A lot of people seem to think we’re a couple.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed that.”

Jaskier cocks his head, putting the magazine back down on the pile. “Then why didn’t you say something?”

Geralt shrugs. “I thought you knew and didn’t mention it because you didn’t want to make it uncomfortable.”

“Well, you’re right.” Jaskier looks down at the pile, eyes caught on the way he adoringly stares at Geralt in the picture, and the way his bodyguard smiles back, “not about me knowing, but...” he shrugs “I don’t want to make this uncomfortable.”

“This?”

“Whatever...” he points between the two of them “Whatever it is we have going on.”

Geralt sighs, pushing away from the doorframe, running a hand over his face. “I don’t think I can be your bodyguard anymore.”

Jaskier’s heart cracks in his chest, and he doesn’t even try to fight to keep the hurt from his voice. “What? Why not?”

Geralt walks forward a few steps, stopping a foot or so from Jaskier. He sighs again, avoiding eyecontact, hand scratching at the short stubble on his jaw. “Because I’m in love with you. Which is highly unprofessional. That’s why.”

And, by the gods, Jaskier could kick and kiss this man at the same time. But, he decides his feet aren’t exactly a match against Geralt and he would probably only end up hurting himself if he were to kick the guy, so instead, he moves forward, cradling Geralt’s face in his hands, kissing him.

After a short moment of hesitation, Geralt kisses back.

He pulls back after a few seconds, Geralt’s face still in his hands. “Hmm,” he mutters, “guess I’ll have to find a new live-in bodyguard.”

“Don’t even think about it,” Geralt says, pulling him in for another kiss.

***

Send me two tropes from this list and I’ll write a short drabble for them!

[thekingsfortress]

-----------------------------------------------

Waiting for the right time

Word Count

3464 Words

AGERE JANUS JUST CUZ WE NEEDED MORE!! THANKS!!

Also this is my first Agere oop, please be nice ^^

Proof reading- who's she never heard of her-

It had been a long week for Janus, he had to calm down Patton from his little rampage, he had to try and convince Roman that he wasnt all that bad, which didn't work at all, and on top of it, he revealed his name.

At the moment he kinda regretted sharing his name, he wasn't ready to share it, not at all, however he felt it necessary to get thomas to just listen to him, and lo and behold, it worked! However, because he made himself so vulnerable, he left himself wide open to Romans laughter.

He knows he shouldn't have said what he had said to him, he knew how insecure the other got, but he couldn't help it, the other just mad him so angry!!! He felt like he needed to protect himself... but- but.. he ended up hurting the other.

He knew he should go and apologize... but he really didn't want to, the other started it so why should he Apologize first!

He shakes his head, holding it in his hands, he had to stop thinking like that... he knows that if he kept it up, he would end up regressing.. he can't afford to do that, it was too soon after the video, he had to make sure no one would come for him.. he also really didn't wanna.. he was always too lonely when he regressed, it's not like he could help it, he knows if he told the others.. they would just laugh.. just like how they laughed at his name.

Janus sighs, glancing around the room, trying to find something to focus on so that he wouldn't lose himself to his other half. He hears a knock on his door and gets up, going over and opening it.

Staring at him was the light blue side everyone knew as Patton, Janus hums, he can't say he didn't expect a visit from the light side, he knew sooner or later the other would come, he WAS basically accepted by Thomas now, so it was only time before the dad side decided to pay him a visit.

Janus tried to keep his composure and looks at the light side, clearing his throat, "good evening Patton, what do I owe the pleasure for such an intelligent, like minded individual such as yourself to come visit a dark, visious, evil, side like me?" He questions, plastering on a smirk.

"You aren't evil Janus" Patton says, using the sides real name, making said side flinch just a bit, he was definitely going to get used to that.

"Ahah, alright, whatever you say, however, you still haven't answered my question" Janus rolls his eyes a little, glancing at his gloves, his thumb picking at his fingers just a bit.

"Oh, well I was wonderingggg if you would like to uhhhh- join in on movie night with me and the others!" Patton grins happily.

Janus's eyes sparkle for a small second, movies!!! With the light sides! Did that mean candy and popcorn and- wait no! Stop!!! You clearly can't join if you are going to be like this!!!

Janus shakes his head for a bit, not noticing the concerned look on Pattons face, "kiddo?" The fatherly side questions.

Janus's head snaps up at the nickname, confusion on his face, Patton had never called him kiddo, not even once! He awhs a bit, he felt his chest swell up with joy at the nickname, but he pushed that aside, "what?" He questions.

"Is something wrong?" Patton asks, "you looked a bit dazed out when I asked you to join.. you seemed happy at first but then just stopped?"

Janus curses under his breath, "I-I'm fine, it's nothing, I just have a few things I need to get done with.."

Patton pouts a little, "awhhhh! You can't even spare one night?" He asks

"Nope! Too much work, I'm sorry Patton but this is a matter between life or death!" Janus nods to himself, forcing himself not to giggle at that little statement- damnit! That sounded too kiddish!!!!

It did make Patton giggle though, "okay kiddo, just know you're welcomed if you want to come okay?" He asks.

"Yeah, I know... now go watch your movies" Janus rolls his eyes, smirking a little.

Patton beams and nods, leaving the room and running back up the stairs to the light side.

Contrary to the light sides belief, Janus could hear all their voices, all their happiness, it made him feel every bit lonelier.

Janus bites his lip, maybe he can.. indulge his urges just for a tinyyyyy bit, but only a little!!!! And only cuz a side already talked to him! He doubts anyone else will come to see him again for the night.

Janus goes over to his nightstand and slides it a bit before pulling back a floorboard and pulling out a tiny box, he opens it and pulls out his plus snake and coloring books, he doesn't have anything else.. he can't summon much things like how the others can..

He does have a snake onesie though!!!! The thought of his snake onesie just makes him really really excited, he lets out little giggles and runs over to his closet and reaches to the far far back, he pulls it out and smiles.

The little one struggles to take off his clothes, whining a little, he does eventually get them off, however, trying to pull the onesie on was a totally different problem.

You see, Janus has been repressing his headspace for way too long, and when he finally decided to indulge in it this time, he slipped really fast, and not only that, but he slipped to a very young age, making him struggle immensely.

The bab sniffles, whining, he was really confused, which hole went where. He ended up guessing a few times and had ended up getting it on, although not zipped. It took him probably 10 tries just to get the onesie on. The zipper still remained down though, he tried zipping it but it got stuck! But.. it wasn't that bad, at least he got most of it on.

He goes over to his coloring books and grabs the strawberry shortcake one, he then grabs his 120 pack of crayons and his snakey and lays on the floor, he begins to color while listening to the others laugh from upstairs, from inside his room.

Janus slowly brings a thumb to his mouth, whimpering quietly, he sniffles a little, he wanted to be with the others, but he knew the others wouldn't accept him, they would just laugh at him..

The child tries to focus on his coloring book until he's finishing coloring his page, he smiles when he finishes and holds it up giggling, he gets up, ready to find someone to hang it up on a fridge.. before he realized, oh yeah.... he didn't have anyone...

He heard more laughter coming from upstairs and felt tears well in his eyes before he rubs them away, he gotta be a big kid, he couldn't bother the grown ups, they'd only get upset at him, he didn't wanna make them upset..

Janus gets up, thumb properly positioned in his mouth as he goes over to the tv, he turns it on like a big boy and ploped back on the floor, grabbing the controller, he looks at the pretty colors of Netflix and Hulu, he knew which colors associated with which and picked Hulu, it had Henry hugglemonster on it!!!

Janus giggles a little and plays the show, holding his stuffed snake in his arms and singing along or more like babbling along to the tune. After about 2 episodes of that he gets up, he was hungry... but he knew he couldn't go out... cuz if he went out, the others would know.. unless he bes sneaky! Maybe he can have icecream!!!!

Janus makes it his goal to be sneaky and get nummy icecream, he gets up and makes his way to the stairs, when he looks up however, he becomes a bit scared, it was so far up.. what if he trips and falls?

B-But.. But Icecream-

Janus bites his lip and takes in a deep breath, for the honor of icecream!!!!

He starts to climb the stairs, holding his stuffed snake tightly in his arms, trying to be as quiet as possible, occasionally putting a finger to his lips as if the snake could make any sound.

Once he makes it up the stairs he quietly opens the door, happy that it doesn't make a sound, also happy that the kitchen is just right there.. though.. that meant the living room was right there too..

Janus bites his lip, maybe he couldn't get icecream.. b-but maybe he could get oreos!!!! Oreos are the second best.

Keeping his giggles down, the boy moves fast to try and get oreos, the only problem was that he didn't know where they were and if the lights had them in the first place.

Janus starts with the bottom cubborts, being extra quiet, holding his snake tightly, crawling from cubbort to cubbort, but all that was in the bottom cubborts were pans and sink supplies an dumb stuff like that.

The mentally two year old pouts before looking up, giggling quietly before covering his mouth, he looks at the couch to see if anyone heard but no one turned their heads.

Alright!!! Time to continue with his plan! He climbs onto the counter shakily but also trying to be quiet, thankful that the movie the light sides were watching was really loud.. at least to him.. his ears were sensitive. So he thought that just because it was loud to him it was loud to the others to.

And yes- he did gotta climb on the counter, he was the shortest side an couldn reach, shuddup.

The boy pulls the cubbort open quietly, finding no oreos which made him pout quietly, he went to another cubbort and pulls it open, and no luck, he whines quietly, feeling his tummy rumbling, lip trembling, there was no oreos and there wasn't anything good to eat...

Janus pouts a little ready to give up till he sees one more cubborr he hasn't opened, he goes over to it, still standing on the counter and opens it quietly... wellll... theres no oreos button

There isssss Crofters!!!!

Janus gasps excitedly, maintaining quiet and grabbing the jar, he doesn't have difficulty opening it as it had been opened before it seems. It was definitely still a new jar, barely eaten out of, well until the mentality 2 year old sits on the counter, eating it with his bare hands.

The others didn't even notice that Janus was in their kitchen until Logan got up and was going to call it a night, when he seen dee eating HIS crofters, the others were quick to look where logan was looking.

Janus wasn't paying any attention to the others, he was just eating the yummy jam stuff, it was really really nummy.

Logan was furious, he makes his way over to the snake side, "hey!" He calls, scaring the life out of the bab who dropped the jar out of fear, making it shatter all over the ground.

Logan gasps as he sees the jar drop, he looks up even more angry, "what do you think you're doing!!! That was my crofters!!!" Logan exclaimed

"Logan be nice, you can share!"

"Not when he sticks his saliva filled hands into my crofters jar!!"

"Loga-" Patton starts, but stops when he hears crying, he turns to face the deceitful side, face full of shock, he did not expect this to happen.

Logan and Patton were now staring at a red faced crying Janus, it made both the sides super confused.

Virgil and Roman were also watching confused from the background, Roman a bit more frustrated that the side had came and ruined everything again!

Patton suddenly takes notice of the others attire and the plus he was holding close, listening as the boy sobs out i'm sorries.

Patton suddenly knows what's going on and so does Logan, suddenly feeling very very guilty.

Patton goes over to the child, and gently rubs a hand through his hair, "hey Jan?" He questions quietly

The sobbing child doesn't answer, trembling with the fear of getting caught and the fear of getting in trouble, he was still saying sorry over and over.

Patton quietly gets down to the others hight, even though he was sitting on the counter, patton may be the second shortest but he still was a few inches taller then jan.

"Sweetie, its okay, hey hey, in 4, hold 7, out 8, remember buddy?" Patton asks, also tapping out the pattern on the others back just in case.

Janus sobs still, but he can feet the pattern on his back and knows what to do, he inhails for 4, holds for 7 but it breaks off of 8, he was about to sob harder until patton gave him a quick assurance.

"You're doing good buddy, can we try that again hon?" He asks.

Janus nods quietly and tries again, and after a few minutes, he's doing alright, theres still tears falling down his face, but at least he wasn't panicking.

Patton smiles softly. "There we go buddy" he says gently, "do you wanna tell me what happened hon?" Patton asks in his best caretaker voice he can muster, usually Logan was the one to do this with him, but he feels like Logan wouldn't be the best at this at the moment.

"Got scawed" Janus slurs over his words sniffling, rubbing at his eyes.

"Why's that buddy?" He asks again.

"Got cawght and was bein bad" he sniffles.

"Aw kiddo, you weren't being bad" Patton says gently, running a hand through his hair.

"Uh-huh! I stow wogans cofters!" He exclaims, his little voice showing.

"Well that is a problem isn't it" Patton says making Janus nod through tears, "but I'm sure Logan can forgive you can't he?" Patton asks, looking at Logan who was watching the scene with guilt, not realizing he was being spoken too.

"Can't he" Patton nudges him, making his eyes widen, he nods, "O-Oh yes, Janus, I apologize for frightening you, it was not my intention, however, next time you want to steal my crofters, you could just asks" Logan says.

Janus looks up at him then at Patton, "M' Not in twouble?" He asks.

"Of course not! It was an accident kiddo" Patton says gently.

Virgil and Roman were watching the whole scene in confusion, why was Janus acting like a little kid? Why was Patton and Logan not questioning this? What was going on?

"Um.. Padre?" Roman calls after clearing his throat.

Patton looks over at him, "whats up kiddo?" Patton asks, tilting his head.

"What is going on? Why are you treating deceit like a kid?" Roman asks both his and Virgils questions.

Upon realizing that Patton did treat him like a kid, Janus awhs, did he know, was he gonna tell them.

"I'm afraid I can't answer that, Janus will tell you when he decides to, I'm sorry kiddos" Patton says, glancing at the boy behind him, looking at the older with awh.

Virgil looks at Logan who shakes his head, the two decide to drop it and face back to the tv.

"I think Logan and I are going to head to bed kiddos, you two don't stay up long now okay?" Patton asks

"Yes Pat" both Virgil and Roman answer.

Patton turns to Janus then to Logan, "Lo, can you clean up the glass while I go clean Jan up?" He asks

Logan nods, "sure Pat" he says, smiling softly.

"Hey Jan"

The boy looks at him, hugging his stuffy tight, getting jam all over it.

"Can I pick you up buddy"

He nods and even makes grabby hands to Patton.

Patton smiles and gently picks him up, he didn't know what he was expecting, but he was definitely NOT expecting Janus to be so light, was the boy eating right? It just added to the list of concernes he had for the other.

Patton brings the other upstairs and into the bathroom, "can you stay here for a bit kiddo?" Patton asks.

Janus looks up, he nods a little, Patton runs to his room and grabs an oversized tee and some shorts for the other, he then bites his lip, he didn't know if the other needed them, but he decided to bring them just in case.

Patton comes back to see the boy still sitting where he put him, Patton smiles, "look at you" Patton chuckles, making the younger giggle.

Patton then runs the bath and puts bubbles in for the younger, he knew that he himself liked bubbles so he assumed the other liked bubbles as well, and he was correct in his assumption, after asking the other for permission to give him a bath, the other had ended up having a giggle fit with the bubbles, he absolutely adored them, making himself a fake beard and other things, Patton even gave the baby a few toys to play with.

He was definitely overjoyed, he didn't even realize when Patton had cleaned him all up, except for his hair, when patton said to close his eyes.

Yes he was sad to get out, but he was also very tired.

"Hey Jan sweetie, I never asked before, because it was a bit chaotic, but how old are you hon?" Patton asked.

Janus held up 2 fingers but then looked at one, he held up 1, not quite sure, he was about 1 and a half now, and Patton smiles softly, he assumed the other might be on the younger spectrum, he smiles, "wow, such a big boy!" Patton smiles, makimg the little giggle happily, rubbing his eyes.

"Now Jan, I have another question for you buddy" Pat says

Janus whines quietly, he was getting tired, "I know, I know, but uh.. buddy, do you wet the bed at nights"

Janus flushes a little a whines, but he nods slightly.

Patton gently rubs his back, "its alright bud, its okay, you don't have to feel bad about it, its totally okay, I'm just going to need you to wear a diaper bud" Patton says gently, earning another whine of protest.

"I know, I know, but we don't wanna wet the bed do we?" He questions, with that thought in mind, the boy shakes his head no, making Patton smile in sympathy, "alright buddy, lets get you changed then" Pat says gently.

Pattom had to lay Janus's other pajamas to go to the washer, and thankfully Janus's snake was easy to clean without having to go into the wash, Patton would hate to hear the boy cry again, he's already been through so much In one day.

Patton changes the boy into the clothes and diaper he brought just in case and hands him his now clean snake and smiles, he picks up the boy, and holds him tight, but not too tight.

Logan was coming upstairs right as Patton came outta the bathroom with Jan in his clothing.

Logan smiles sympathetically and the child, noticing what he was wearing, though he pretended not too.

"How was bath time?" He asks both of them.

Janus snuggles against Patton titedly while Patton smiles softly, "he had quite a journey, although I think its time to put the little one to sleep" he says, smiling at the side.

Janus was already half asleep by the time Patton said those words.

Logan smiles softly, "seems so, we should go lay him down in his room" he suggests.

That seemed to wake the bab up just a little as he starts sniffling, "noooo!!" He whines quietly, hugging tightly to Patton.

Patton smirks, "you heard the boy, he said no so no's the answer" Patton chuckles.

Logan rolls his eyes and chuckles, "alright, your room then Pat?" Logan asks.

Patton nods, "my room" he says

They both walk to Pattons room, Patton lays Jaus in the middle while he gets on the right and Logan on the left, it was the first time Logan and Pat had company, but they found that they didn't mind one bit, especially when it was an adorable little snake just wanting some cuddles.

Janus obviously stayed more against Patton during the night, but during the days to follow, and the more he regressed, he found that he didn't mind Logan either, only time would tell when he would tell the other too, but for now, he only wanted his two caretakers, and one playmate.

The end

[writersperpetualblock]

Breakfasts in a broken home.

A/N; Cuz I’ve got a major crush on older men. This was originally written as a Jeffrey Dean Morgan × Reader thing but halfway through I changed my mind to my very neglected baby Chris Evans of whom I never write anything. So here is.

Summary; How much can a broken marriage hold when there is nothing left to hold on to? You can try to ignore it, you can try to run from it. But the truth will always catch up to you.

Warnings: Sensitive topics such as depression, malnutrition and divorce.

••••••○

Reader PoV.

Waking up was hard, the air felt chilly even when the sun was already high up in the sky. A soft sigh escaped me as I turn around, half expecting my husband to be lay sleeping by my side. Half expecting him to be on the other side of the country, working.

Not surprisingly enough I find the second one to be the truth. Neither confusion nor disappointment drowned me anymore, now it felt more like a huge wave of empty crashed inside me. Just last night he had gone to sleep on this bed, craddling me in his arms, even after our heated fight. I closed my eyes, and without warning a tear escapes me. I knew what I was getting into when I married him, I knew he'd always be trapped in tons of work and have important things to take care of all the time. It was just sad that I wasn't one of those things anymore.

I could not gather the strength to get out of bed. I simply couldn’t. Not today. Not without my Chris.

Someone slowly knocked on the door. I was quick to wipe the tears from my eyes, hoping anyone would come through the door but my son.

“Come in” A skinny girl pushes the door open and enters the room head down. I was never a fan of having maids, but Chris insisted he wanted to give me the best care whenever he was away. And after a while of what would have been very lonely weeks at a time, I came to appreciate their company.

“Joan” I acknowledge the girl just a few years younger than me and with a baby boy near my owns age. She carried a tray in her hands and much to my dismay I sat up and instructed her to leave it on the night stand. She did so and gave me a small but bright smile.

“Mrs Evans, the kids asked earlier if they could go to the town’s annual fair that's taking place in a few hours. Of course Matteo wished to come ask you himself but I told him you were still asleep“ her brown eyes scan me, as if trying to decide what my reaction is going to be.

“I don’t see why not.” I try to give her a smile “Thanks Joan, you may take them yourself. I'll give you some money for the boys. Buy icecream, cotton candy or whatever they want and bring them back for dinner, all right?”

She nodded and walked out of the room with a smile. Then her head popped at the door again. “I will get them ready now and I'll tell Mateo to come say hi before he leaves.” She trailed off, seemingly unsure of her next words “He has not seen you out of bed in days Y/n.”

My eyebrows rise at that, and she closes the door behind her. Can't be mad when she's telling the truth, but the reprimand isn't exactly appreciated.

Taking one look to my breakfast I sigh, I didn’t feel much like eating today. But with Joan's words pounding in my head, I knew I needed some strength. If not for me for my son. But before anything else I reached for my phone to send out a single text.

: Where did you go?

As I awaited a response I slowly got out of bed and heade to the bathroom between dizzy steps, trying to recall the last time I had more than a granola bar and chocolate to eat. Not being surprised by the fact that I didn’t even remember. While brushing my teeth I managed to avoid a glance at the person on the mirror. Not wishing to see her swollen cheeks, or the dark circles under her eyes or her mistreated skin. After a layer of particularly pink lotion to my face and a cold water rinse I felt a tad more awake, trying not to sprint inside the bedroom at the first ring of my phone. No, instead I took my time drying my face and putting some handcream on. Finally heading out of the bathroom and straight torwards the phone.

Chris♡: They called me in to retake some scenes. Will be home by night.

Of course. The phone found itself being dropped back in the bed rather harshly. Like we didn’t have a marriage emergency going on.

I almost chuckle, marriage emergency… what kind of selfish bitch was living within me. It was his work, mostly what gave me and my son the spectacular roof over our heads and brought food on the table since I pretty much quit my job. I shouldn’t expect it to be less important. It’s not like his family was at stake here.

Suddenly shutting my senses to my thoughts I attempt to shake them off my head. But I can’t. All I do is contradict myself, all there is is a never ending inner fight with myself and it was making me lost. I had a son to look after. I needed to be more supportive of my husband. Of myself when it came to that. But I felt mentally and physically exhausted. And it needed to stop. Start with your breath...

When I consider that I have collected myself enough to pick at my breakfast and turn around there is an expectant little figure by the door. And I feel the wind knocked out of my stomach.

I gave him a small smile. “Hey baby” he quickly runs up to me and my body crouches on instinct, lifting him from the floor and squeezing him into my arms. I breath in the scent of his blonde waves. For a moment, all of my inner fight had dissipated. All of the struggle forgotten for a second and there is a smile on my lips. A true smile.

“Good afternoon momma” he wraps his short arms around my neck. My nose itches and for a second I think I may cry.

“oh I love you baby” I reply, sitting him on the bed. The pain on my lower back not going unnoticed as I do so, but I have mastered the art of acting and sit next to my son.

“Adrian is still getting ready momma, can we watch tv?” he looks up at me, baby blue eyes sparkling, just like his father’s do. "Mhmm" is all I get out. Could my own kid look less like me? It's as if Chris made him solo and I simply carried and gave birth to his offspring that had nothing to do with me.... maybe the nose.

We sat back on the bed. Matteo watching a cartoon, and me trying to eat my food like a little girl being watched eat, almost obligated. With a sigh I take a spoonful of oatmeal to my mouth. It wasn’t bad really, warm and creamy. I eat half of the plate and share a cookie with my son. We both lean back on the bed, Matteo with his small body against my side. I took a second to enjoy it but it didn't last. Joan knocked on the half open door, her son by the hand. "We are ready to go!"

Matteo smiled widely and jumped off the bed, sprinting towards them but stopping in his tracks and heading back to me. I giggled as he left a loud kiss on my cheek and then ran again to his friend. I instruct Joan where to find some money and she smiles, thankful. When their steos are out of earshot I turn the tv off and fill the bathtub with hot water. Deciding to make myself useful or something on this day.

It had been sometime since I'd last taken a nice bath. It was really cold outside so normally a quick shower would suffice, and I'm sure it was more than a day ago since the last one. Yes, I should be ashamed, but I didn't care too much. It's not like I was doing anything too exciting inside these many, many walls.

••••○

Answering the 14th call of the hour a hand runs through my hair as I sit down on the small bed of the trailer.

"Hey Chris, what's up?" There's a tone of worry that I recognize.

My head starts spinning with possible answers, but I shake my thoughts away. "I'm fine, it's just Y/n."

"Oh, is she doing okay?"

"Not really." there's a pause as he gives me time to get my thoughts together "She isn't getting out of bed. She barely eats, she doesn't spend time with our son... I feel like it's my fault, because I'm always away and I've neglected her so."

"Hey I don't think it's that, she knows you need to be away Chris, I'm sure she understands that even if it's hard. And she can take care of herself."

"Yes I know she understands, but, just last night we had a fight. It was the first time I'd been home for weeks and she fights with me."

"You guys have a son that's 3, just couse she understands I don't think it's any easier on her, so you gotta give her some credit."

"I'm worried that she doesn't pay attention to him, what if he thinks it's because of him? I don't know how she might treat him when I'm not there."

"Chris! you know better than anyone else how much she loves Matteo. I couldn't possibly think of her as much as putting her hands on him, much less being mean."

"I know... I just worry, and all kinds of things just come up in my mind."

"Well you need to home more man, if you don't even know how things go in your house maybe it's time you quit."

"What? Scott I signed a contract, I can't just" my back hits the bed with a loud creak and I shut my eyes.

"Break it, I'm not saying it's forever. But you both have a lot of money. It could probably sustain you guys for a lot more years. Your wife needs you brother, and so does your son."

"I can't just..."

"Chris this is your freaking family!"

"I know dammit I KNOW!" Inevitably hot tears fill my eyes and I have to wipe them with the back of my hand.

"What are you so afraid of?" Scott asks and it makes tears to well up again.

A shocked sob came out with the next words "That she's gonna want to leave."

"Chris, Y/n loves you more than a human being can love. You can go and fix your marriage now, or you can keep working until the amazing woman that sits at your home sinks into a bottomless depression that drowns her and your son with her."

My brother's words hit me. I knew it was getting bad, but I was too scared to deal. It was easier being away and pretending I had a happy marriage at home waiting for me every time. But reality was creeping in more and more, I noticed that yesterday.

"What did you guys fight about yesterday?"

"Uh.., my drinking."

"Chris... you're not abusing it are you?"

"No I'm not, I just, had a few glasses because I was finally home. After weeks, and she got mad, said Matteo shouldn't have to see me like that, and I got mad because I really wasn't drunk," My head hurts at the memory of it "it got heated... fast, and I threw a glass against the floor and she got scared and I just... I feel like she sees me like stranger Scott."

"I would see you as a stranger if you were never home and on top of that started acting up when you were. I think you guys should take sometime off, talk things and maybe go to couple's therapy or some shit, I don't know. But you two have a kid, spend some time with him, don't fuck him up just because the two of you have problems. The jobs not worth it, the money's not worth it, at the end of the day, nothing is worth more than your family."

"I fucking hate when you get all deep with me" I chuckle, sitting up and resting my fforehead in one hand.

"That's only because I'm right." my brother laughs too.

"How about you? Are you guys doing alright?"

"Don't worry bout us, we're still on the honeymoon phase"

We both laugh and say our goodbyes, having my brother pep talk me. I knew I had to get my family back, even if I hadn't really lost them, yet. But I needed the incentive to do so.

Reader

The baths I prepare are pretty damn good, dare I say so myself. Laying back on the water, taking a few deep breathes. It does wonders. And suddenly an idea pops in my head.

When I was somewhere around 18 I struggled with depression for years. And one of the things that helped me through that was to write down how I felt, how I wished to feel and how I could improve my situation. It was how I took writing as one of my hobbies.

So I started typing away on my phone.

I know I am not as pretty as I used to be.

I never was too perfect, or perfect at all.

And I'm conscious that my body might not look desirable anymore.

Maybe, I never deserved your love.

Or maybe it was you who didn't deserve mine.

But we made it through the hate,

we had something so beautiful.

We made life.

And I wish things could go back to being so beautiful.

But I would still love you if you decided that I'm not enough for you anymore.

I will accept anything.

All I know for sure is just that this can't keep on like this.

We deserve to be happy.

I deserve to be happy.

For the good of the life that we created,

for the good of our son,

we must get better

wether that is apart or together.

"I had forgotten how much I suck at this." I laughed at myself, but that was fine, because it got the message across. I think.

I hope.

Divorce wasn't something new to cross my mind. I just never thought I would want to discuss it, not so seriously. My parents were divorced, and my mom and I did fairly good. My dad did great on the other hand.. It wasn't that I was scared of it really, because I considered myself capable enough.

My only fear was that I would never move on from Chris, I loved him still. I have loved him since our first kiss. But sometimes it felt as if I barely knew the person that I loved anymore. My heart was still clinging to his, but my mind could not be any more distant right now.

If I really wanted to save our marriage I had to act now. But I couldn't do it alone, and that was exactly how I felt that I was.

The water went cold, and I stood up grabbing the nearest towel. Stepping out of the bath I bent down to unclog it, and when I stood back up my ears rang.

I held onto the wall for a second, and it only got worse. The room obscuring and spinning at the same time. I am not sure if I slipped or if I fainted, but I could surely say there was a bit of blood running down my forehead.

And when I finally came back to it, I was already on an ambulence.

"Ma'am. Mr. Evans is on his way, you're okay."

My eyes went to the back of my head, it felt as if I'd been on a damn carousel for hours. What the hell was happening to me?

There was a distant voice asking me things, and all I could reply was dizzy and nauseous several times.

I fucked up, who was going to take care of Matteo. I couldn't take care of him in a hospital. He needed me by his side.

"You should have taken better care of yourself."

[vintagevalentinex]

Mend

I am extremely happy with this story.  Gadreel is one of my favorite characters on SPN (besides the reason that Tahmoh is GORGEOUS).  I was so upset when he died.  Like ruined.  I’ve wanted to write something about Gadreel for a long while now, and admittedly he is extremely difficult to write.  So I hope that I did him some justice.

@icecream-and-winchesters​: A MILLION thank yous for letting me use that line from your story!

@bovaria​: Buckle up.

@abaddonwithyall​: I have an inkling you’d like this story.

Send me a message or whatever and let me know what you think! :)

Title: Mend Author: vintagevalentinexx Words: ~1850 Pairing: (Gadreelx Reader) Warnings: Kind of angsty?  It resolves.  Fluffy too.

You looked upon him in awe as he stood in front of you.  He was built like a brick house, his leather jacket tight around his shoulders and back.  He looked powerful, his facial expression unchanging, as he continued to stare at you stoically.  There was no denying that he was a soldier, yet his eyes gave it all away.  For a being that was millennia old, he was horrible at hiding his emotions, at least through his eyes.  As you continued to look at him, it became more apparent:  he was broken.  Beyond repair?  You weren’t sure, but you were never one to give up on anyone.  If those crazy Winchester boys taught you one thing during your time with them, it was that giving up was not an option.  You took a step toward him, your hands held in front of you to show you were not a threat.  You will yourself to take another step when you see he is unmoving, chewing on your lip as you think of what you could possibly say to a creature who feels so guilty, so completely devastated about everything he has ever done.  When you muster up the courage to speak, you realize just how close you are to him now, trying to not let your nerves get the best of you as you gaze up at his imposing frame.  You gape a little, before pursing your lips, a shaky hand finding its way to his muscled arm, resting on his bicep.  “You are not alone, Gadreel.”    

That was months ago.  You couldn’t believe it when you were driving on your way back to the bunker after ganking some vampires and you saw him on the side of the road.  The boys had told you about him, about what he did to Sam, about his dealings with Metatron, but Cas had really helped you form your opinion on the disenfranchised angel.  When he told you about Gadreel’s selflessness and his loyalty to humankind, it broke your heart to hear how everyone treated him, how they used him.  When you saw him hopelessly on the side of the road, you couldn’t help yourself.  You got him into your car and took him back to the bunker, after a lot of yelling and arguing from Sam and Dean.  You stood your ground, though and he was still recuperating in the bunker.  

You finally opened your eyes slowly, your body waking up as you stretched, popping and cracking joints as you prepared to start your day.  As your feet landed on the floor on the side of your bed, you heard the dull humming of the television from a few rooms over, likely that one of the angels were nearby.  The corners of your lips turned up into a soft, sleepy smile as you remember the first time you caught the both of them watching Netflix.

You had just come back from a rather grueling hunt with the boys and decided you needed to pig out in the kitchen for a while.  Freshly showered and dressed in some comfortable pajamas, you padded out to the “living room” as Dean called it (he was beyond happy when Sam let him splurge and buy an enormous TV).  You smiled softly as you watched both Cas and Gadreel scrolling through Netflix (now that Cas was an expert at it).  You leaned against the doorframe as you listened to their conversation:

“Brother, I do not understand this ‘Netflix’…where is the net?  This is very confusing.”

“Gadreel, it’s fine.  We can watch movies on here while you gather your strength.”

“Muuu-vie…movie?  What is a ‘movie’, Castiel?”

Castiel sighed.  “Don’t worry about it, Gadreel.  You will understand soon enough.  For now…for now we can just Netflix and Chill.” You lost it as your entire body shook with laughter, both of the angels snapping their heads to look at you with bewilderment.  As Cas was about to ask you why you were laughing so hard you shook your head, dismissing him with your hand.

“Don’t worry about it boys.”

You smiled widely as you shook your head, leaving the room, leaving two very confused angels in your wake.

You made your way into the living room, stopping at the entrance as you watched Gadreel sitting there alone, staring at the news, his hands gripping tightly at his jean-clad thighs.  You cleared your throat, breaking him out of his trance as his eyes shifted to you, glassy as if he were about to shed tears.

“Hello, (Y/N).  I trust that you slept well.”

He smiled at you, but it was one that didn’t reach his eyes.  You knew he was going through the motions.  He was a man (err…angel) that sacrificed his life, his grace, his everything to try and make up for at least a little of what he had caused.  He knew what he was doing, and he knew that he couldn’t come back from where his sacrifice was taking him (or so he thought).  You probably figured that he thought it would have been better that way, but you knew better.  He had been so very loyal, so passionate in his beliefs since the moment you found him on the side of the road.  You knew that you had to help him heal. You wordlessly sat down next to him, pulling one of his large hands into both of your smaller ones.  He gasped almost inaudibly at this gesture as he looked on, uncertain as to what you were doing.  You shifted to face him, rubbing his hand with your thumbs.

“Show them to me.”

“(Y/N), what are you talking about?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Gadreel.  Show them to me.”

He looked at you, panicked, his mind racing, trying to think of a reason to not.

“Please…(Y/N), please…”

You looked up at him, squeezing his hand in reassurance.  “I promised you a long time ago that you are not alone, Gadreel.  I don’t break promises.”

He sighed as he stood up, clicking off the television before standing before you, lights flickering and popping.

“I…don’t understand, Cas.  How come they look like a shadow?”

“This is only what your human eyes can perceive.  If I were to show you my real wings, your eyeballs would explode, which would be extremely painful.”

“Oh.  Sounds sexy.”

Cas stared at you confused as the both of you patrolled an abandoned house (typical), looking for a reported vampire nest.

“Okay so I understand that…I guess.  But um…your feathers…?…they look like they are falling off your wings…well I mean, the ones that you have left…are you okay?”

He looked at you, sighing a little.  “I have been through much trauma, both physical and emotional.  The wars in Heaven, the Apocolypse, being in Purgatory…all of these things have caused me great pain…”

You put a hand to his shoulder, squeezing.  “Say no more.  I should have never asked such an intrusive question…you are pretty damn tough, Cassie.”

He smiled almost bitterly as the both of you continued with canvasing the house.

Gadreel’s wings enfolded in front of you, and it took everything in your bod to not let out a pained gasp at how sparse they looked.  You could almost see charring on them, tears threatening to well up in your eyes as you continued to look on.  He couldn’t bring himself to look at you, staring intensely at the ground, probably trying to not let himself cry as well.  You stood up, your knees trembling a little as you stepped toward him, much like you did so many months ago.  You took his hands into yours again, pulling him out of the living room, toward your bedroom, all without a word.  He followed you, seemingly broken at the moment.  Knowing that he could stop you in your tracks at any moment, but was too upset to do so almost made you cry right there, but you had to be strong for him right now in this moment.  You had him sit down on edge of your bed as you bent down, hugging him fiercely, as tightly as you could muster, your hands running up and down his back, trailing his spine, feeling him arch into your touch.  You rested your head in the crook of his neck for a while, staying in that moment with him for a little while longer before getting on the bed yourself, crawling up behind him, your hands trailing up and down his muscled back again.

“Do…do you trust me right now, Gadreel?”

All you heard was a soft grunt of acknowledgement before your fingertips were under the hem of his shirt, pulling it slowly up and over his head.  You ran your hands on his heated flesh, feeling the muscles twitch and flex underneath your fingers.  You rested your head on top of his shoulder; your lips close to his ear as you spoke tenderly, wanting to show him how much you cared.

“I want to help you heal, Gadreel.  Let me help you.  I may not be able to fix your wings, but let me try and illuminate some of the darkness.”

He trembled as your lips trailed lower, leaving a hot trail in your wake as you kissed up and down his back, lingering on his shoulder blades, imagining that you were kissing his wings, trying to kiss the booboos better.  Your hands followed your lips, rubbing and kneading at his tensed muscles, not leaving a single part of his massive back unkissed or untouched.  As you finished, you hugged him from behind, tears already spilling down your cheeks as your heart broke for him, just wanting to do anything and everything in your power to help him.  He finally turned around in your arms, pulling the both of you up to the headboard of your bed, leaning his back against it, taking you with him as he tucked you against his large frame.  He ran a hand up and down your arm, leaning his head on top of yours.

“Thank you, (Y/N).  Thank you for showing me kindness.”

You wiped the tears from your eyes, unconsciously snuggling into his warmth.

“I would do anything to help you, Gadreel.  I care about you very much and I want nothing more than for you to have some happiness.  You, above anyone else in this entire universe, deserve happiness.”

The both of you sat there in a peaceful silence.  Gadreel shifted to look down at you, his lips turning up in a smile as he realized your breathing evened out, sleep taking you a while ago.  He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, throwing the blankets over the both of you as he pulled you in closer to him.  

He whispered into your hair.  “I will mend, (Y/N).  I will lick my wounds and become strong again.  For you.  I now have purpose, and I have found a light in the darkness.”

You shifted in your sleep, hooking a leg over the both of his as you mumbled in your sleep, your hand finding one of his, lacing your fingers together.

“Sleep well, my Little Light.”

Read Part 2!

[ellus986]

Always knew you / chapter nine

Joe Mazzello x reader

Warning: Loss of loved ones,swearing,fighting.

Comment: Y/N is corrently 22, while Joe is 35.

Summary: you knew Joe all of your life, and as best friends you two always find the way back to each other.

Joe gets into the hospital room with frightened face. You are already almost crying. “Y/N, why didn’t you call me?”

“Babe I didn’t call anyone, I was unconscious, they called my mom from my phone.” You say.

“You were unconscious?” His voice is shaky as hell.

“Yes, I collapsed when I saw the blood on my leg...” you start to tear up.

“Blood...on your leg?” You see how his hand starts to shake. You close your eyes, you can’t deal with it. “Because...?” You hear his desperate voice, and you know he is hoping you say something else.

“Please don’t make me say it...” you start to cry with still closed eyes. “I can’t... I just can’t say it out loud...” you wishper and you hear him sniffing. The next thing you know that he is huging you, thight, with all of his strength.

“Silly, I... I...I...” he can’t even find the words.

“I know...” you sniff and grab him closer to you.

You stay like this until a doctor come in the room. “I’m sorry for your loss. We are still runing some tests, but you will be free today.” She is saying then turning to Joe. “Husband?”

“Boyfriend” he nods, still with tears in his eyes.

“Well, as I did say previous to your girlfriend, it seems like nothing really coused the miscarriage, she looks heatlhy.” She says with no emotion on her face, as she sees Joe’s face she continues. “Sometimes thing happen without reasons. Maybe next time she will be having a healthy pregnancy with even more stress, and she will be totally fine, and will be the baby too. This is unfortunate, but should not mean you can’t have another children.”

If it wouldn’t be the day you lost your unborn child you would be happy to hear this, but now you just start to cry again. “I leave you now, next time a come back with all of your results.” she says before leaving.

Your phone starts to ring on the table. Joe pick it up and look at you. “It is your mom.” He says, and you don’t know what to do. “Want me to speak with her?”

“I’m sure she is scared what is wrong” you wishper. “But I can’t tell her.”

“I will... if you want me.” His eyes are on you.

“She needs to know, as your mother too.” You nod.

“I’m on it.” He picks it up on the way out to the passageway. “Hi Lilly, It’s Joe...” you can’t hear him anymore, but you see him trought the window. He is covering his face with his hand to hide his tears. After he puts it down, he calls someone, surly his mother. You see him tear up again, and you can’t help but ugly cry all over again. It hits you, you feel like you failed everyone.

When Joe comes back you just mumble. “I don’t know how I will tell our families...”

“You don’t need to, the moms take it down from our shoulders...” he answers.

“Are you sure.”

“You need time,I need time.

Yes,I am sure.” He nods and gets you in his arms again.

____________________________________________

You were home for the past 3 days on a break, Joe didn’t leave you alone for a minute, and you need him just to be with you. You were watching tv and eating icecream almost all day, if you weren’t sleeping in his arms. You cried out all of your tears until you couldn’t cry anymore. Your mom called you everyday to make sure you are okay, as did Ginnie. Your dad even mad sure you get your favorite choko muffins he always bought you when you were sad as a child.

The night came and you are lying in bed, while Joe is sitting on the edge with a tense body.

“What’s wrong?” You ask.

“Nothing...” he says but doesn’t look at you.

“Tell me!” You poke him with your leg.

“I was just thinking...”

“Come on!” You goad him.

“Just that what would have happend if you were never pregnant, would you even be with me...”

“Excuse me?” You cut in. “Joseph Francis Mazzello III., you are about to tell me that I’m with you just because our child.”

“Who will never be with us.” He nods.

“You are kidding with me!” You scream at him as you get up from the bed. “I loved you all of my fucking life, and that is what I get? Just the night before you go off for a week?”

“Don’t say you did not have this on your mind!” Comes from him looking at you with mad eyes.

“Fucking not!” You go for his scotch, don’t even care about a glass you just drink straight from it. “I wanted you before YOU even brought up pregnancy! So that means you are the one who don’t want to come back after leaving in the morning?” You start to cry. “Then go, I won’t ruin your life!”

You wince as you hear his voice so close to your back. “You can never, ever ruin my life!”

“I already did!” You shot.

“No you didn’t” he grabs you but you fight your way out crying. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry...”

“It is easy to say, just after you ripped my heart out! I just lost my baby, and now I need to lose you.” You scream and cry at the same time.

“No! You won’t lose me!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes I will be back, before you start to miss me!” He looks at you with pain in his eyes. “I’m just fucking afraid of losing you.”

“You say thing like that and want me to believe you are the one who don’t want to lose the other?” Your sarcastic laugh is killing even you.

“Yes I am! Look at me!” Tears start to fall from his eyes. “I’m old, I should have had kids before, but I have none, and here you are and the life is at your feets!” He sniffs. “I just don’t want you to realise some day, that you deserve better, because you do!”

“If you really know me, you know that I don’t want better or other, I just want you, always you!” You leave him there, get in bed and try to sleep.

____________________________________________

Joe kisses your cheek as he gets out of bed. It is four in the morning, and he will be leaving in half an hour. You half asleep as he wishpers. “I love you” and you say nothing, you don’t know what to say, what to feel, your heart is just broken. After he got his clothes on, you hear him on the phone. “Sorry nincompoop for annoying you this early, but I fucked up, really really bad, I need your help.” He waits for the answer then says. “I need you here, I pay for your plane, for the cab everything if you are free for a week” you turn and he is looking over you, but still thinks you are asleep. “I own you my life.”

_____________________________________________

“Honey! Can you let me in?” Says Lucy on the phone, and you open the building door, and than leave the front door open. You sit on the floor crying, brushing your hair, when she gets in. “Honey, are you alright?”

“No, Yes, I need to...” you wishper.

“What did he do?” She looks angry.

“We had a fight, before he left” you sniff.

“About what?” She asks.

You answer before even thinking. “About that if I would have never been pregnant I wouldn’t even be with him...”

“You are pregnant?” Asks Lucy.

“Shit, I didn’t wanted to tell you like this I’m a mess, I’m sorry.” She is still looking at you with the question on her face. “No, not anymore.” You sniff.

“Not anymore? What?” She is huging you.

“I had a miscarriage three days ago.” You hide your face into her neck.

“Ooh honey, I can’t even imagine what you been trought, and that bastard was able to say this to you? I’m going to kill him” says Lucy.

“Luc, I need to get myself together, I need to be at the field in an hour.” You look at your watch you get from Joe.

“Why?”

“I’m the leader trainer in the camp that starts today!” You say, and start to angry brushing your hair.

“Give it to me honey, I braid your hair!” Lucy gets the brush out of your hand, and help you.

“Thank you!” You nod, and feel little relaxed as she is pulling your hair. You just close your eyes and let the moment flying by.

“How did it come for you to be a baseball teacher?” She asks as your hair is done.

“You can guess two, I even stole a photo about Joe when he still was playing, I wanted to be like him, so I got in the team, and I felt in love with the sport, and ofcourse I love kids.”

“You stole a photo about him?” Her mouth is wide open in shook.

“Still noone knows, it is under my childhood bed.” You laugh for the first time in days.

“Nasty girl, can I go with you to the camp?” She asks.

“You don’t need to!”

“I want to help you!” She says with a bright smile on her face.

“With what?”

“Cheering you up, cheering the kids up” she tries to mimic a cheerleaders moves.

“That can work, but only if you want to come with me” you say. “I’m sure you had a lot planed before Joe called you”

“You know he called me?” She is suprised again.

“I was awake.” You nod. “So if you want to go home do your stuff, feel free.”

“Honey, I had no plans for this week, only to meet up with Rami, but that can wait, now you are the most important for me” she smooths out some baby hair from your face, and you hug her.

“Thank you, but if you want to go anytime, really feel free!”

“I won’t I want to be next to you” she kisses your cheek before you to head out to the train.

As you guessed everyone was over the moon, that Lucy Boyton will be there with them in camp. She was the perfect human being to cheer everyone up, even after lunch, when must of the kids wanted to sleep, she made them excited about an another practice.

After the day ended in the camp you headed home with the train. You are laughing all way long until your phone starts to ring.

“Hard knock life?” She smirks. “Joe?”

“Yes...”

“Give it to me!” Lucy grabs the phone from your hand. “Hallo? I’m sorry she is not available... ohh I don’t know maybe she just don’t care about fucking bastards” and she just hangs up on him. “It felt great.” She chukles.

“Even for me” you kiss her on the cheek.

When you get home you get to the kitchen thinking what should you two cook, but than Lucy holds up the wishky.

“It’s Joe’s” you say.

“So it is ours now!” She nods.

After you eat some sandwiches for dinner, you sit out on the balcony, with iced scotches.

To be continued...

@spacedust1124719 @mrsmazzello @sam-mercurry-sixx

[itsallavengers]

The Problem With Communication

For the REAL MVP’S WHO BOUGHT ME ICECREAM EARLIER, MIMI AND STRIVINGARTIST. YALL ARE THE BEST.

Anyway, have some deaf!Tony and smitten! Steve who fall in a love in a coffee shop, because I’m Basic like that.

It was stupid, to be half in love with a person you’d never even spoken to.

Steve watched as the barista named Tony swing the cardboard cup up in the air, bouncing it off his elbow without even looking and landing it on the counter with ease. Long, beautiful fingers flipped the switches on the coffee machine and set it off working, and then he jerked his head, flipping the thick curls out of his face, letting Steve see the tiniest flash of the most stunning blue eyes he’d ever seen. He set his focus on the coffee underneath his hands, his face intense, like all his attention was devoted to the fairly mundane task, and Steve knew he should probably stop watching right about now, because it was getting weird, but he just couldn’t help himself.

He’d been coming here every day for weeks, since he and his friends had opened up their comic-book store on the other side of the street to the café, and each and every time Steve had never had the courage to just go up and speak to the damn guy.

It might have been easier if the man actually served people, but it always tended to be someone else who took his order, and just Tony who made the drinks and then dipped back into the kitchen before Steve could speak a word. Sometimes though, he got a shy little smile from across the room when Tony was wiping down the tables or clearing up behind the counter and caught Steve watching him. Steve always quickly averted his gaze and tried to hide his blush at being caught out, and sometimes he would even hear the smallest and most lovely chuckles. They made Steve’s entire morning whenever he managed to coax one out of him.

They were currently communicating through half-hidden smiles, stolen glances, and occasionally Tony would draw smiley faces or leave little messages on the cup before the server handed it over to Steve from across the counter. Steve retaliated by leaving doodles of Tony at work on scraps of paper, and then dropping them hurriedly on the counter before hurrying away.

It was a bit stupid. Steve just needed to grow some courage and actually talk to him. But…

God, he was just so pretty. Steve knew that he would fumble it, and then he’d ruin everything and Tony would think he was super weird or something. He was… well, he was working up to it, okay, slowly. Thinking over what he could say. Working on his pickup lines.

 “This is pretty pathetic, dude,” Bucky told him as he sat across from Steve on the soft couches in the open-plan café. “Does your idea of flirting just involve staring at him like a creep until he calls homeland security or something?”

Steve blinked, and pulled his eyes away from Tony’s back as he reached up for some syrup on the top shelf. He then shoved Bucky sulkily. “It’s not pathetic,” he said, pouting a little. “It’s romantic.”

That made Bucky chuckle. “Oh, Steve, one day I’ll teach you how to flirt. Until then, though, I’ll just leave you with a simple task: fucking say hi to the guy.”

“It’s not that simple, Buck-“

“Why the hell not?”

“Because!” Steve flapped his hands, flustered, and then quickly tamed them into something more normal when Tony caught the action and looked over. Steve just smiled at him, and then felt his heart do a few flips ion his chest when Tony looked down for a second and then smiled back, before slipping into the kitchen again. Steve watched him go, and then whipped his head back to Bucky and pointed over at the space Tony had just occupied. “Have you seen him? He’s… he’s gorgeous! He almost certainly has a girlfriend, because he is hot and cute and straight, undoubtedly-“

“Oh, right,” Bucky scoffed, “because all these overdrawn staring matches and ridiculous smiles are just casual, definitely.” He leaned forward, grabbing his cup and taking a hearty swig of espresso. “Look, Steve, he’s into you. Even I can see that- although God knows why, after the flirting tactics you’ve been employing. But whatever works for you guys, I guess. Anyway- I’m going to leave you now, and when you get back on shift, I am expecting you to tell me that you at least said hi. At the very least.”

“And if I don’t?”

“I’m coming in here and telling him myself,” Bucky declared promptly, before standing up. “Good luck, buddy.”

Steve’s eyes widened in horror. “No, nuh uh, don’t you dare-“

“Now or never, Stevie!” Bucky jogged backward and grinned, waving a hand toward the counter where Tony had just reappeared. It was early on a Tuesday morning, so there was no-one else in the café at all aside from Steve, Bucky and Tony. The other ginger woman who usually manned the counter was nowhere to be seen, this time.

Steve flipped him the bird, but Bucky just cackled and then let the door shut with a small tinker of the bell. Tony was looking at the place Bucky had just left, blinking a few times in confusion, before he once more turned to Steve and then smiled once again.

Now or never. Now or never. Come on, Steve, just man up and say hi. Hi was easy. It didn’t mean anything. It was just a hi, for God’s sake.

He stood up and rubbed his palms on his jeans, before stumbling forward. Okay, this was going to be fine. He was just saying hello to his ridiculously attractive barista who he’d been staring at for pretty much one month straight.

Wandering up to the counter as casually as he could, he pressed his hands into the cool marble and leaned forward, clearing his throat. Tony, who was cleaning the espresso machine, didn’t seem to notice, and Steve resisted the urge to just turn tail and run. He’d got this far. He could do the rest, right?

“Hi,” he blurted, before his anxiety could start screaming in his ears. “Hi, I’m… I’m Steve.”

Tony didn’t even turn around.

Steve stopped, caught like a rabbit in the headlights. Tony hadn’t even acknowledged him at all. Oh, shit, now what was Steve supposed to do? Act like he’d never said anything? Never come to the café again? Apologize? See, this was why he should have just kept his mouth shut, how the hell was anyone supposed to talk to strangers, there should be a fucking rule book for this shit-

Tony turned, then, reaching for the cloth, and he saw Steve staring at him like a lost puppy. He stopped in his tracks.

“Sorry,” Steve blurted hurriedly, looking down and backing up, “sorry, I don’t… I didn’t… God, this is so weird, did I freak you out? Sorry-“

He paused his rambling when Tony gave him a blank look, and then held up his two hands. Steve just kept looking at him, entirely unsure of where to say.

But then Tony did a funny gesture with his finger. Moved it from his ear down to his mouth, and then licked his lips nervously. Steve stopped for a second, completely blanking. He had no idea what Tony was doing, and was far too frightened to even ask.

Tony did it again, and then shrugged. He looked slightly sad now, and his eyes fell away from Steve’s as he shook his head.

It clicked, somewhere in the back of Steve’s currently frozen-in-fear brain.

“You’re deaf?” He blurted, before shaking his head. Oh God. Idiot. He was asking a deaf person a verbal question.

Tony must have been able to lipread or something though, because he just nodded a little sadly. He shrugged, and then made an aborted movement with his hands like he was going to say something, before he realized that Steve wouldn’t understand it. He shuffled uncomfortably on his heels and looked down.

Oh. Tony was embarrassed.

Steve felt himself frown, his anxiety suddenly forgotten as he decided on a method to get around this problem. A second later, however, a beautifully lucky realization threw itself into his mind, and he jumped on his feet, making Tony look at him in surprise.

Steve grinned, and then held up a hand, beginning to step backward. “Wait here,” he said, hoping Tony could lip read well enough to understand what Steve was saying. To solidify the request, he pointed to Tony, and then to the ground, before suddenly turning on his heel and sprinting out of the door without another word, heading in the direction his little comic-book store where the rest of his friends were working.

He had a plan. 

    _____

 _____

   Tony watched as Steve turned and hightailed it out of the café, and all he could do was sigh.

He hadn’t expected anything less. It’s what everyone did, when they realised that he was, y’know, deaf as fuck. Tony couldn’t even blame them. How was 90% of the world supposed to have anything to do with him, when he couldn’t even hold a conversation?

Steve had been nice, though. And hot. Tony had stupidly found himself wondering, just a little, whether Steve would be able to speak ASL- or just any sign language at all. Tony knew British, Spanish, French and Chinese sign language- any one of them would have been a Godsend, even if Steve had only known the basics.

Tony had still been too scared to actually do anything other than smile at him from across the room, though. Because he knew it was stupid to wish for things like this. Normal people didn’t know any sign at all. Normal people just tended to stare at him blankly when he shrugged and told them he was deaf, and then make some hasty excuse to leave so they wouldn’t have to attempt the awkward task of communication.

Tony looked down, and bit his lip. It was fine. He didn’t have time for more people than Rhodey and Pep, anyway. He was busy inventing, and writing up his thesis for MIT. Other important things. More important than friends, for sure.

Slapping the cloth a little more violently than usual onto the counter, Tony wiped down the surface and tried not to think about Steve, and how he probably wasn’t actually going to come into the café and smile at him again. Which was fine. Maybe Steve would see him in five years, when Tony was on TV, famous for his designs, and able to hear everything perfectly thanks to the invention he was currently working on.

Hah. That’d show him. And Howard, who’d kicked him out four years ago at fifteen after getting too bored of trying to fix Tony and decided him a lost cause. And all the teachers who’d looked down on him and thought he was stupid. And everyone-

There was a sudden movement ahead of him, and he looked up curiously.

Well. Okay. He really… hadn’t expected to see Steve back so soon. And this time, he was dragging a friend along with him. With ashy, spiky blond hair, he was short and stocky, and looked rather confused to be here. Tony was feeling the same way.

Steve looked over to him and smiled brightly, and Tony just blinked. Steve, apparently unperturbed, turned to his friend, and spoke rapidly, too fast for Tony to be able to catch and lipread. He stood there rather awkwardly, until the blonde man turned to Tony in surprise, and then grinned.

Then he lifted his hands and signed ‘hi, I’m Clint.’

Tony took an instinctive step backward in shock. Steve was just smiling happily.

It took a moment for him to be able to respond. Too busy staring at Steve incredulously. ‘Hi,’, he signed back, ‘I’m Tony. And I’m... very confused’

That made Clint laugh, and he turned to Steve and repeated Tony’s words, keeping his mouth facing Tony as he did it. Tony read easily this time, because Clint’s mouth moved slowly, expertly. Steve nodded, and then smiled brightly at Tony. It was like the sun, Tony thought a little dazedly.

Steve said something else to Clint, who nodded with a small roll of his eyes. He turned back to Tony, and then lifted his hands once more. ‘Steve’s asked me to tell you that he thinks you’re really pretty, and he’s been wanting to talk to you for ages, but he never knew how to start it because he’s an awkward bitch.’

Tony grinned, and cocked his head. ‘How hard were you paraphrasing there?’ he asked, because he’d been watching Steve’s mouth, and was pretty sure that it hadn’t been saying things like that.

Clint shrugged. ‘Oh, none of that actually came out of his mouth. He told me to tell you something about dumb cup flips and the smiley faces you drew which he liked, because he is way too socially awkward to  actually let you know about his massive crush. But he is totally smitten. He talks about you all the time at work.’

Tony raised his eyebrows, feeling his heart speed up a few notches. He looked to Steve, who was grinning a little bashfully, and rocking back and forth on his heels. It was adorable, and it was… it was touching. That Steve had thought to do this for him, to go to that much effort.

Most people just gave up.

He kept eye contact with Steve as he signed ‘can you tell him that I think he’s cute?’ over at Clint.

Clint did, and then Tony watched as Steve blushed firetruck red and then bit his lip as he held his smile down, looking to his shoes. Tony didn’t hear his own laugh, but he felt the vibrations in his throat.

Steve paused for a moment, before stepping forward. He didn’t break eye contact with Tony as he snagged a pen from his pocket and then held out his hand. Tony may have been deaf, but he knew a cue when he saw one, and he dutifully held out his own hand in response, aware of how fast his heart was going underneath his skin.

Steve really wanted… to keep this up? Even when he knew that Tony was-

Steve’s mouth started to move, and Clint translated with the appropriate signals, diverting Tony’s attention. ‘Steve says that you should text him sometime. He would love to get to know you, but he’s going to need a month before taking you out to dinner, if that would be okay?’

Tony felt the pen scrape against his wrist, and felt the warmth of Steve’s fingers. He swallowed, and then nodded dumbly. ‘Sure’, he responded, which Clint then told Steve, who positively radiated happiness when he looked to Tony again.

When he dropped Tony’s hand, he immediately missed the heat. Tony remained rooted to the spot, somewhat unable to process the information his brain was receiving.

Steve wanted to go on a date with him. Steve wanted his number so they could text.

No one had ever asked him on a date before.

He smiled nervously, and then signed ‘I’ll text you tonight then, hot stuff,’ which made Clint grin when he processed it, and Steve blush even redder when it got translated for him. Tony felt himself laugh again, and he stepped back, unable to quite wipe the smile from his face, even as Steve backed off and left the café, waving as he went.

As soon as he was gone, Tony pulled out his phone and then typed in the number, the light feeling in his heart making his fingers shake the tiniest amount. He was scared, and he had no idea how to do any of this, and would almost certainly ruin it in less than a week, because that was just the way he worked, but-

Well. Steve liked him. That was… more than anything Tony had ever had before. It sent a weird feeling into the pit of his stomach; fear and panic and a weird kind of hysterical happiness, that centred itself right above his heart.

 Maybe, just maybe, this could work.

     _____

 _____

   Steve swallowed nervously, hands going through his hair for the seventh time that minute as he looked to the entrance of the restaurant and waited for Tony to walk through the doors.

Over the past month, they’d pretty much been texting non-stop. Steve found that not only was Tony amazingly attractive, but he was funny too. And kind. And interesting. And smart, god, Tony was pretty much the perfect guy, wrapped up in a beautiful package. It was a wonder that no one had picked him up already.

Steve couldn’t exactly say he minded about everyone else’s idiocy, however. It just meant that Tony was there, for him.

And, of course, speak of the devil-

Steve’s breath caught in his throat as he caught sight of Tony as he slipped through the doors. Dressed in a midnight blue suit, curls styled out of his face, aside from one ringlet which had fallen free and draped itself over one of Tony’s piercing blue eyes. His gaze shifted across the room rapidly, and Steve waved, standing up so suddenly that he almost knocked the bottle of water over in his clumsiness.

Tony smiled at him- the same shy little thing that they’d been sharing at the café for nearly two months now- and Steve just melted.

He wandered forward, a little nervously. He seemed to be searching for someone else- Clint, no doubt- but when he came up blank, his face twitched into the smallest frown of confusion, and he looked back to Steve.

Taking a deep breath, Steve lifted his hands and signed ‘you look beautiful’.

For the past month, he’d been taking lessons whenever he could. He had Clint testing him every night, and his quick learning meant that he’d managed to grasp the basics of it all fairly rapidly. He could finger spell with ease, and for the words that he didn’t know or couldn’t understand, he’d brought a pen and paper handy with him too.

Tony froze, eyes going wide. Then he laughed. Loud and untamed due to the fact that Tony could not hear himself, Steve thought it was the most wonderful thing in the world. He lifted his own hands and signed slowly, ‘you learned for me?’

Steve nodded. ‘I’m still bad. You have to sign slowly. But I have pen and paper in case I don’t…’ he paused, trying to think of the word, before clicking his fingers and finishing with the ASL for ‘follow’.

Tony was looking at him with a face so full of softness and… and emotion. He licked his lips and looked away, and when he looked back, Steve noticed that his eyes were a little damp. Immediately, Steve’s face fell, and he rushed forward, going to reach out for Tony’s hands, before pulling back and signing ‘sorry, sorry, I just wanted to make it easy for you’

Tony shook his head though, and he smiled, even when the first tear fell from his cheek. He cupped Steve’s cheek with soft and lovely fingers, just for a moment, before pulling away and signing ‘No one has ever gone to that much effort to understand me before.’

Steve stopped, and then he clenched his jaw, gathering all of his confidence and then taking Tony’s hands into his own. Pressing the most feather-light kiss to his knuckles, Steve smiled, and then dropped them. ‘Well, no one else knew what they were missing out on.’

Tony huffed, and quickly wiped his face, before looking back to Steve. Taking in a small huff of air, he suddenly leaned up onto his tiptoes and then placed his hands lightly to Steve’s chest, kissing him ever so softly on the mouth. It was nervous and quick, and when Tony pulled away he was looking down at his feet, blushing bright red.

God, Steve was so lucky.

“I have a feeling this is going to go really, really well,” Steve said out loud whilst Tony was still looking down at his shoes, feeling as if the grin on his face was bright enough to light up the entire room.

AO3 /// Donate to my ko-fi ! !

[krazykarny1031]

Kirideku.

Chapter 1 : Party Time

Izuku POV

Aizawa sensei may have made a huge mistake. He had let the class throw a dorm party to celebrate the fall break of their second year. It has turned into a catastrophe. How did Kaminari even get this much alcohol past Principal Nezu and All Might!? I was now watching all of my classmates get completely drunk. Denki, Mineta, Ochako, Iida, and Jirou were all currently so wasted out if their minds.

Denki looked more dumb than when he over used his quirk.

Mineta was passed out on the floor surrounded by the broken remains of a Jack Daniel's bottle.

Ochako and Jirou were sitting in a corner together giggling at literally nothing.

And Iida was currently in one of the bathrooms with his head thrown in the toilet. No one thought he would even be drinking.

Aoyoma, Hagakure, Mina, and Sato faired a little better but not much. Aoyoma was currently the only one dancing to the music. Slowly trying to get a lightly drunk Shinsou to join him....by dancing mostly on him. Very, sexually.

Hagakure and mina had joined Sato in eating most of the snacks.

Tokoyami, Yaoyurozu, Kacchan, and the previously mentioned Shinsou were all handling the alcohol. The had some minor slips, but the could still form functional sentences. Tokoyami was leaning on a very lightly buzzed Shoji. Telling the tall male how much he loved and appreciated him and his kindness. Yaoyurozu has decided to sit in front if the tv that was playing some cooking show from America. Shinsou was trying very hard to not 'dance' with the attractive sparkly blond who was now grinding against his crotch. Now I should have expected what Kacchan would do. Because he had snuck some of his mothers alcohol stash over to my house when we were kids. He can be very.... kind and loving. He was currently smiling at me and hugging me.

"Y-ya know nerd. You... are like my best friend. I.. I have always looked at you and been inspired to work so hard. That's why I was so mad at All Might! I-i wanted to be y-your hero! You were my friend to protect." Kacchan explained. He currently looked like a relaxed, happy version of himself and smelled like the strong fruity cocktail that Shoji had made for Todoroki and Kacchan.

I couldn't help but whisper a very soft "t-thank you Kacchan"

"Of course you nerd!" He hugged me very tightly.

"Shouldnt you go check on Uraraka, Bakugou?" Came the soft sturdy voice of Shouto.

Kacchan soon left to the corner the Ochako and Jirou occupied.

"T-thank you Todoroki-kun." I said

He nearly shrugged and drank the cocktail silently.

Sero, Todoroki, and Shoji were much stronger drinkers than anyone in the room. Sero and Todoroki shared small talk and sipped their handmade drinks. Made by none other and Mezou Shoji himself. He had an extensive knowledge thanks to his habit of reading large amount of books. Shoji was smiling and holding onto his small boyfriend, Tokoyami. They had become an item not too long after their first year in class started.

Oijirou, Tsuyu, Koda, and myself had opted out of drinking. Tsuyu so that she could keep an eye out for the girls. Oijirou because he had decided that alcohol just never did anything for him. Koda said he would never do that until he was of age. And myself for personal reasons. Kacchan knew I could get hurt if I drank. So he made sure that no one could try to give me anything. Until he got drunk himself.

You see, I'm almost as bad as Uraraka-san if I drink. You could ask me to do anything and I'd do it. You see my problem. It's very dangerous. We had all decided to stick with sodas and water for now.

The last one I haven't mentioned is Kirishima-kun. He's a bit.... different when drunk. He's not as bad as Iida or Ochako but worse that Kacchan and Tokoyami.

Eijirou has hit on all of the girls most of the guys and 5 inanimate objects since he got drunk earlier. He hasn't tried anything with Shoji, Tokoyami or me.

He's usually a very kind and caring guy. He's also a very attractive guy. I mean of he was sober and flirting with me. I would most certainly not mind.

He's a very flirty, sexual person when he's drunk. He gains this aura of hotness and sexiness he doesn't usually carry, with a new load of confidence as well.

His hair was down and loosely forming around his face. He wore a pair of ripped jeans that formed lightly to his muscular legs. And a very form fitting tank top. THAT HE IS NOW REMOVING HOLY SHIIII...!!!!

"Are you staring at Kirishima, Midoriya?"

Came the voice of Shinsou who now had his arm wrapped around Aoyoma, with a giant smirk on his face.

"W-what?! N-no! I wasn't!" I yelled trying to hide my face on the couch pillows.

"N-no worries mon cher! Your secret is safe with usss~~" Aoyoma responded.

"H-he's just attractive. He wouldn't even like me like that!." I responded.

"Well how do you know?" Shinsou quipped.

"H-he hasn't tried to flirt with me tonight. He's flirted with everyone else. He even flirted with the m-microwave!" I was almost tearing up and they both could see it. They looked at each other and then at me. Then at something else I couldn't see behind me.

"Well maybe you should tell him." Aoyoma said with a giggle.

"After all he is right behind you." Shinsou smirked and pointed at Kirishima who had indeed sat right beside me in the couch. While I was telling them I liked him.

"EEEK!" I screamed and blushed trying to find something in my head to say.

"K-k-kirishima-a kun! W-when did y ki u get here.?!!?" I tried to play it cool.. in the most uncool way.

"Hey Izuku~. What were you guys talking about?." This guy... was flexing while he's talking. Flexing while fixing his hair. Damn him. He knows exactly what's going on and he's playing with me.

"Little Midoriya here has something he wants to say to you. Eijirou kun~." Aoyoma is officially my least favorite person. With the way he said it and the way he's touching on Shinsou he's implying everything.

"Oh really now~? What is it 'dude'~?" He looked and me with this predatory, hungry gaze. All I can think is I'm going to get eaten alive.

"Spit it out Izuku. It'll make you feel better if you tell him." Shinsou insists before walking away with Aoyoma.

" What is it man? What's up?" Kirishima asked slightly more serious. About as serious one could be while drunk and shirtless.

"W-well I um. May..... m-may l-l-like you" I whispered the last words. Confusing him.

"Huh? You gotta speak up a little. You can do it.~" He was teasing me again.

" I s-said. I like y-you." I closed my eyes waiting for anything. Rejection, anger, him to leave. I wasn't prepared for him to laugh.

"Hehe~ you're so cute Izuku. I heard you on my way over. I just wanted to hear you say it to me~." He looked at me. Then it hit me. He called me cute. And he heard me talking to Shinsou and Aoyoma!

I blushed about the same shade as his hair and tried to book it.

"I-I'm sorry!" I yelled trying to reach my room. He chased me and grabbed my arm before I coul reach the door knob.

"Hey now. I never said anything bad about it did I?" He looked at me waiting for a response.

"Y-you..? Do you?" I could barely get the words out of my mouth.

"Like you too? Of course I do~." Kirishima said leaning in to kiss my forehead.

He glanced back at everyone. Seeing Bakugo and Uraraka head towards the elevator giggling at each other. And Kirishima smiled a very mischievous smile and turned to me.

"I could show you how much I like you~. If you don't believe me. We could always do what they're going to do." He nodded towards the drunk couple kissing as the elevator doors closed and took them up o Kacchan's room. He reached for my rooms doorknob and gently ushered me in.

"W-wait K-Kirishima!? W-we can't!" I tried pleading.

"Why not? I thought you liked me Izuku?"

"I-i do! B- but you're drunk. I don't want to do it if you're not in a proper mindset!' I said as he closed the door and pushed us on my bed.

"So... if I sobered up really quickly you'd let me fuck you?" He said not caring about how lewd he sounded.

"T-that's not what I meant! And d-dont say it like that!" I stated.

"But why? I want to fuck you and love you. Why wont you let me?" Kirishima kept asking while sitting up and pulling me on his lap.

"B-because you're drunk! You're not completely in control of your thoughts and actions, Kirishima. "

"Eijirou."

"Huh?"

"You can call me by my first name Izuku."

"O-oh. E-eijirou. We should wait till tomorrow to talk about this."

"How about this? I want to kiss you. Let me just do that. And let me sleep in the bed with you, let me hold you. I won't do anything but that. And in the morning when I wake up and I'm sober. If I push you away or say I regret tonight, then I give give you my full permission to throw me out the window. But if hold you tight and hug and kiss you, please give me a chance. Please Izuku, just let me love you just a little. " he looked at me with such desperation and passion in his eyes I couldn't say no.

"O-okay..... you can do that E-eijirou."

I looked him deep in the eyes and nodded signaling he could have his way.

He simply gazed at me before slowly connecting our lips.

He tasted like spice. Not like peppers but like cinnamon and alcohol. He soft lips tasted like a cup of some spiced drink you would get around winter. It made my entire body go warm. It was comforting and addicting.

I pulled back slightly to look at him.

He's eyes are glazed over with lost and shining with joy.

He's smiling calmly and smoothly.

"Y-you uh.. taste l-like uh .. Christmas..?" I look at him quizzically and blushing darker.

He chuckles and responds "Thanks~. You kinda taste like an icecream cone. Super sweet." He smiles an specks my lips quickly. He picks me up and stands off the bed, me still in hand as he adjust the blankets for us to get under them.

We crawled in and he immediately pulled my back flush against his chest. I couldn't help but blush as his crotch came in contact with my butt.

" mmmm. You've got such a soft round ass Izuku.~." He tried to grind into me.

"W-wait! Y-you said we would just c-cuddle!" I squealed.

"I'm sorry. I lost control for a second. " he stopped and kissed my neck and squeezed me tighter to him.

"Good night Izuki. And I do love you but remember the deal. "

He slowly started drifting to sleep and adjusted where I was facing him before falling asleep too.

Chapter 2 continue? Y/N

[luminnara]

It’s Been a Long, Long Time | Ch 7 18+ NSFW

18+ ONLY PLEASE

Warnings: nsfw, sexy sex, abo, knotting

Part 6 | part 7 | part 8

Tags:  @kyrah-williams williams @oceanmermaidwitch @shawnie--jo @super-cape @ferxaniti @namjoonwatcheshentai @fandomsstolemylife00 @youngblood199456 @nightlygiggless @darlingely @bluemoon-icecream @kaz11283 @jenjen8675309 @dollfacev8 @witchinpractice @mystical-b3ar r @sukeraa @momc95 @book-lover-2006

Bucky was still reeling from finally getting to hear her name. While the omega explored his apartment, he sank down onto his couch, his head buzzing with thoughts of her and him and his past life with HYDRA and how her name felt so, incredibly, impossibly right.

Amoretta.

It didn’t sound familiar to him, and he was pretty certain that he had never known it before. That made him feel a little bit better about everything, a little less guilty for almost completely forgetting about his omega. He hated how much less he remembered about her than she remembered about him, even if it wasn’t his fault that HYDRA scrambled his brain up so much all the time. No matter how many times he told himself that it was okay, that he was already doing his best, he couldn’t help but feel like he was a bad alpha.

But when she looked up at him with that smile and those eyes, so trusting and happy and comfortable...well, a lot of those negative thoughts flew out the window again.

“So you live here? Like, for real? Like, all the time?” She asked as she inspected his tv.

“Sure do.” He chuckled, sitting on the couch to watch her. “Whaddya think?”

She spun around in a little circle, taking it all. “It’s...perfect.”

Bucky smiled. “I’ll have to find some more blankets for you.”

Amoretta paused, looking at him curiously. “For what? I don’t think I could ever be cold with you around. You’re like a furnace.”

“Well...so you can...you know.” He was feeling stupid again. She wasn’t even thinking of nesting with him around, was she?

“So I can what?” She seemed puzzled.

“You know...make a nest…” he mumbled. “Isn’t that what omegas are s’posed to do? I’ve heard Bruce makes them…”

Realization dawned on her and her jaw dropped a little. “Oh. I haven’t gotten to nest in...um...ever?” She laughed. “HYDRA never let me.”

“...oh.” Bucky cleared his throat.

“But now that I’m thinking about it, that might be nice.” She glanced around the room, already looking for a good spot. “Maybe there? Ooh, no, I don’t want it out in the open, do I? Or maybe I do…”

“Hey, FRIDAY?” Bucky asked.

“Yes, Seargent Barnes?” The robot replied, her voice sounding from somewhere in the ceiling.

Amoretta jumped. “Can she see us right now?”

“I monitor everything in this tower,” Friday said. “Tony has designed me to run all necessary systems.”

“Yeah, yeah. Tell someone we need more bedding. Blankets. Lots of ‘em.”

“I will let Miss Potts know right away, Seargent.”

“Thanks, FRIDAY.” He said, kicking his shoes off to rest his heels on the coffee table.

“Of course, Seargent Barnes.”

“So...you’re a Seargent?” Amoretta asked, making her way over to sit on the arm of the couch.

He stretched his arms back behind his head. “Seargent James Buchanan Barnes. World War II. I was with the 107th.”

“Is that how you know Steve?”

He smiled, his head. “Nah. We were always friends. Grew up in Brooklyn together.”

She sat up a little straighter. “Brooklyn?”

“Born ‘n raised, doll.”

“I wanna go!” She bounced down onto the cushion next to him, both hands pressing into his thigh as she suddenly leaned up towards his face. “Please?”

“Uh, sure.” He was a bit taken aback by her sudden movement, but he wasn’t complaining about how close she was now. “Mind tellin’ me why, though?”

“You mentioned it once.” She rubbed her nose against his neck, sighing happily as she scent of cloves filled her senses.

“...I did?”

“Mhm.” Amoretta snuggled up against his side, fitting next to him perfectly. “I don’t remember everything from back then, but I remember that.”

“What’d I say?” He brought on of his arms down to drape around her shoulders, hugging her closer.

“I think I asked you what kind of life we’d have outside of HYDRA.” She rested her cheek on his chest. “You told me we’d live in Brooklyn, in our own house. And…” she trailed off, blushing slightly.

“And what?” He asked, curious.

“You said we’d have lots of pups.” She chewed her lip, looking away from him in embarrassment. “It was probably just your rut talking, though, you know...i-if you don’t want that now, it makes sense. I mean, you’ve got this whole life now, and…”

She trailed off as she noticed that his chest was rumbling with a loud purr. When she finally brought her eyes back up to his face, she saw that he was watching her, features relaxed into a soft, thoughtful expression.

“Do...you want pups?” She asked, heart leaping hopefully.

“Always used to want a whole little family.” He pulled her up to straddle his lap. “Didn’t think I’d get the chance to, but now…hey, I never sired any for HYDRA, right?”

“Not that I know of.”

“Good.” He sounded relieved. “That’d be a fuckin’ nightmare.”

“They made sure my heat suppressants kept me infertile.” Amoretta said. “They didn’t have a program for breeding super soldiers ready yet.”

“Good.” He growled. “No pups of mine are ever gonna grow up in a place like that.”

She reached up, running her fingers through his hair. “You really want them now?”

“Course.” He pulled her forward, wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing his face against her scent gland. “Maybe not, like, now, now, but…with you? I do.”

Amoretta’s eyes widened, a happy little keen leaving her throat. “I’ve waited so long to hear you say that…”

Bucky tugged her back so he could face her. “I’m gonna court you properly. Do it right.”

“But you don’t need to—“

“I don’t care.” He interrupted. “I’m an old fashioned guy. I’m gonna court you.”

She grinned, a hand trailing down the side of his neck. “How old fashioned, exactly?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

“Too old fashioned to have a little fun?” Her hand slipped down to press against his chest.

His purr turned into a growl, his hands moving to hold her hips. “Doll, all you gotta do is ask…”

Amoretta brought her lips to his ear. “Will you fuck me, Bucky Barnes?”

It only took a moment before his lips were on hers. He was gentle, but he was hungry, devouring her in a kiss that left her breathless and would have made her knees weak had she been standing. With his hands slowly sliding down to her ass, Bucky was perfectly content to take his time; he wanted to feel her, inch by inch, until he had memorized every curve and dip of her body.

Her skin was so soft beneath his callouses. He nudged her sweater up a bit, his hands slipping underneath it to grab at her tits. She couldn’t help but let out a whine against his lips when he brushed a thumb over her nipple, her nails digging into his shoulders as she held him.

When he broke away from the kiss, he gave her lower lip a sharp bite. “Bed. Now.”

Amoretta practically launched herself towards his bedroom, scrambling onto the bed without a second thought. Bucky followed at a much slower pace, enjoying the view as she shed her clothing.

“Hey, maybe I wanted to do that,” he teased, crawling over her. His lips found her neck, his fangs scraping her skin.

“I-I wanted to make it easier for you,” she gasped, back arching as he gave her scent gland a gentle bite.

“I wanna take my time with you, sweetheart.” His voice was husky and low, his breath hot against her throat. “I wanna enjoy every second…”

She sighed as he nipped and licked at her, her hands slipping under his shirt. Her fingers ran across his abs, feeling the way they flexed beneath her touch as he ground his hips into hers.

“You’re overdressed,” She said, tugging at his hem. “Let me see you.”

Bucky broke away from her neck and grabbed his shirt, shucking it off and tossing it behind him. “Better?”

“Much,” She hummed, taking in the sight of his naked torso.

“Good.” He took hold of her hips, leaving a trail of kisses behind as he made his way down to her pussy. “God, you smell fucking amazing…”

Amoretta trilled happily. “So do y—oh my god…”

His tongue was already lapping at her. She couldn’t remember anyone ever eating her out before, but Bucky seemed determined to make up for lost time. He acted like he was starving, sucking and nipping at her clit while he sank a finger inside of her.

Her hips bucked against him, his vibranium hand holding her down while his human hand played with her. She was already soaked, slick running down her thighs, and her scent was driving him wild.

“Fuck, I want you…” he growled, adding a second finger. “So wet, so willing…and you smell so delicious….” He inhaled slow and deep, savoring it. “I think I’ve missed this…”

“D-do you actually remember all the t-times you rutted with me?” Her voice hitched with little gasps as he stroked her inner walls.

“Yes and no.” He admitted, leaning his cheek on her thigh and looking up at her. “But I know this scent…”

“What scent—ah!” She bit her lip as he crooked his fingers a few times, warmth mounting in her belly. “K-keep going, I’m—FUCK!”

She shuddered as an orgasm rolled through her, electricity tingling in her limbs.

“The scent of my omega, all drippin’ wet, just for me.” He pulled his fingers away, licking them clean. “I wanna fuck you, doll…”

“Please,” she whimpered, scooting back up toward the pillows as Bucky stood.

Amoretta’s eyes were glued to his hands as they unbuckled his belt, his movements quick and determined. He was tired of waiting around. He wanted her now.

As he shoved his pants down off of his hips, she bit her lip again, rubbing her thighs together. She could remember how good he felt inside her, and as she thought about the way he always used to snap his hips into hers, she felt another trail of slick running down her legs.

At the sight of his cock, she was practically a waterfall.

Before he could get back to her, Amoretta was flipping over onto her hands and knees, presenting herself for him with her ass up in the air. She peeked back over her shoulder at him, watching as froze and then stiffened, a low, impossibly loud growl rumbling in his chest.

“Good girl,” he praised her, his cock already rock hard as he crawled across the bed towards her.

Amoretta gave a little wiggle, trying to convince him to hurry up. When his hands grabbed her hips and jerked her back against him, she squealed in surprise, the sound melting into a moan as he rubbed his cock against her.

“Please,” she whined. “Please, please just fuck me, Alpha, I need it…”

“How bad?” He leaned over her, nipping at her shoulder.

“S-so bad, please, just—“

She interrupted herself with another moan, her hands clutching at the sheets as Bucky finally gave her what she was craving so badly.

He pressed himself into her slowly at first, waiting to feel some resistance. She was so soft and warm that he almost came then and there, his teeth sinking into her shoulder as he forced his hips to still. Fuck, how could someone feel so good? Her pussy felt perfect around him, gently squeezing his cock as he pulled back out and then thrusted back in, already balls deep inside her. He could tell why he had liked her so much during his ruts, but he had no idea how he could have managed to fuck her for more than thirty seconds during one.

When he started moving again, Amoretta turned into putty. She was absolutely melting, angling her hips so that he could sink in deeper and deeper, slick running down her thighs.

“You like my cock, baby?” He asked, voice muffled by her neck as he dragged his lips over her skin. He wanted to be as close to her as possible, and he didn’t care if that meant both of them being a tangled mess of limbs and sweat. He just wanted her.

“Y-yes, Alpha,” she gasped, slowly sliding down until her chest was squished against the bed. He felt even better than she remembered, his cock rubbing against every single perfect spot inside of her. He was stretching her out comfortably, her slick providing more than enough lube to ensure that his size could never hurt her.

Fuck, he was perfect. He was made for her. They were made for each other.

Bucky was pressed against her back, shielding her with his entire body. He didn’t want anyone else to see his omega. The sight of her there, beneath him, taking his cock so well was for him and him alone, and he was going to make sure it stayed that way.

“Want me to fill you up?” He asked, licking her scent gland.

“Y-yes please,” she moaned, leaning her head back for him.

“Want me to breed you, over ‘n over, ‘til you’re full of pups?” He bit at her jaw.

“Yes!” She cried, whines and trills all flooding from her throat in a symphony of needy sounds.

“Say my name,” he panted, his knot already beginning to swell.

“B-Bucky,” she moaned as she felt it catch on her. Fuck, she had forgotten how good it felt to be stretched and feel it filling her.

He let go of her hips, his hand finding hers. “No, my real name…”

“J-James,” she gasped, intertwining their fingers together. “James…please knot me...”

That was it.

Hearing her gasping and moaning his name sent him over the edge, and before he could stop himself, he was exploding inside of her. He snarled, biting her shoulder again as he held her down, his knot locking him in place as he pressed his hips forward.

Amoretta sighed happily at the feeling, relaxing as Bucky’s weight fell onto her. He was panting hard, trying to catch his breath.

“Fuck,” he sighed, kissing the already-healing bite marks on her shoulder. “Sorry ‘bout the bites.”

Amoretta grinned at him as he helped her turn onto her side. “I like your bites.”

“Oh yeah?” He pulled her up against his chest, settling in to wait for his knot to go down once more. “I’ll remember that.”

“Super soldier, remember? Built to withstand you at your roughest.” She snuggled back.

“Guess I’ve got something to thank HYDRA for, after all.” He chuckled, drawing lazy circles on her hip. “You didn’t cum when I was inside you, did you?”

“No, but that’s fine.” She shrugged. “I did before.”

“That’s not enough,” he growled. “If my knot wasn’t so swollen right now, I’d be fucking you until your legs shake.”

“Is that a promise, Sergeant?” She asked, a mischievous glint in her eye.

“It is.”

“Well, then…” she held his jaw in her hand, leaning up to whisper in his ear. “I can’t wait for your knot to go down.”

[selina569]

1) What images do you have set for your desktop/cell phone wallpapers?

Phone: Ignis Scientia Desktop: Natalie Dormer

2) Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

Yeah I have lol

3) What was your last text message?

“Ok”

4) What do you see yourself doing in 10 years?

I would like to have a career in publishing, and/or doing something with my writing, be married, and have at least one kid :)

5) If you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?

Sleeping. I’m tired af

6) What was your coolest Halloween costume?

Poison Ivy <3

7) What was your favorite 90s show?

Charmed

8) Who was your last kiss?

@jaesylvr

9) Have you ever been stood up?

Yes multiple times in high school

10) Favorite ice cream flavor?

World Class Chocolate: dark and white chocolate mousse flavored icecream

11) Have you been to Las Vegas?

No, but I want to.  

12) Your favorite pair of shoes? 

Silver, sparkly, peep-toe, stilettos

13) Honestly, have you ever cheated on your significant other?

Yes.  

14) What is your favorite fruit?

Grapes

15) Have you talked to anyone on tumblr that you could see yourself dating/having sex with? If possible?

@jaesylvr​

16) Are you into hookups? Short or long term relationships?

Doesn’t really matter i’m up for whatever.

17) Do you smoke? If so, what?

Yes: hookah and weed

18) What do you do to get over your anger?

Shut myself away and watch tv or listen to music

19) Do you believe in God?

I believe in the kind of God situation that Supernatural has.

20) Does the person you're in love with know it?

I hope so ;)

21) Favorite position?

Sexually? Me on bottom because I’m lazy lol  

22) What's your horoscope sign?

Gemini

23) Your fears?

Clowns, bugs, cars, drinking fountains, throwing up, someone I love dying, failure

24) How many pets do you have? What kind? 

5 Cats: Mistique, Finn, Kiki, Thor, and Loki

25) What never fails to turn you on?

Neck kisses, when the other takes control/initiates, hugs from behind :3

26) Your idea of a perfect first date?

I don’t really have one I’m down for whatever just don’t be boring.

27) What is something most people don't know about you?

I was sexually harrassed and assaulted

28) What makes you feel the happiest?

My cats, music, spring days, book smell, TV, those rare moments i have where I can just do nothing.

29) What store do you shop at most often?

Either Charlotte Rousse, Victoria’s Secret, or Hot Topic

30) How do you feel about oral? Giving and/or receiving? 

I like giving and receiving, but I have jaw problems so after giving I am in extreme pain :(

31) Do you believe in karma?

Hell Yeah

32) Are you single?

Nope

33) Do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?

Use your words! Material objects do not substitute an apology......but chocolate.

34) Are you a good swimmer?

Yes

35) Coffee or Tea?

COFFEE!!!

36) Online shopping or shopping in person?

Shopping in person because girls clothes are fucking weird!

37) Would you rather be older or younger than your current age?

Younger, I miss being a carefree child.

38) Cats or Dogs?

Both!

39) Are you a competitive person?

It depends on the situation.

40) Do you believe in aliens?

Duh.

41) Do you like dancing?

Yes!

42) What kind of music to you listen to?

I listen to everything there isn’t a lot I don’t like

43) What is your favorite cartoon character?

Flynn Rider <3

44) Where are you from?

Shaumburg, Illinois, U.S

45) Eat at home or eat out?

Getting food to pickup and bring back home lol

46) How much more social are you when you're drunk?

Very! My alcohol of choice is tequila and I become a sloot

47) What was the last thing you bought for yourself? 

Chips at my school’s vending machine

48) Why do you think your followers follow you?

I have no idea lol but if anything probably my variety of content. It’s a little of everything.

49) How many hours do you sleep at night?

Average: 5-6

50) What worries you most about the future?

Finances

51) If you had a friend that spoke to you the same way you speak to yourself, how long would you be friends?

Probably, I try to reassure myself a lot because of my constant doubt

52) Are you happy with yourself?

Overall yes, but there is always room for improvement

53) What do you wish you didn't know?

I wish I didn’t know my fear of driving and cars because it is so crippling to my daily life.

54) What big lesson could people learn from your life?

STOP OBSESSING OVER SOME STUPID ASS PERSON WHO DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU, also don’t let people invalidate your sexuality.

55) If you could live in any home on a television series, what would it be?

Probably the bunker in Supernatural because hot boys and loads of books <3

56) What's your favorite Website?

Netflix.com

57) What's the habit you're proudest of breaking?

Holding onto toxic people

58) What was your most recent trip of more than 50 miles?

From my college to my parents’ house.

59) What's the best bargain you've ever found at a garage sale or thrift store?

Goodwill and Savers always have super cheep book and I can get like 10 books for $5-$15

60) What do you order when you eat Chinese food?

Hot and sour soup, chicken or shrimp entree, fried rice, egg roll, crab rangoons

61) If you had to be named after one of the 50 states, which would it be?

Alaska cuz John Green lol

62) If you had to teach a subject to a class, what would it be?

English or Creative Writing

63) Favorite kind of chips?

Lime flamin hot cheetos

64) Favorite kind of sandwich?

Italian Sub

65) Which do you use more often, the dictionary or the thesaurus?

As a writer, definitely the thesaurus

66) Have you ever been stung by a bee?

Bee no. Wasps 3 times

67) What's your favorite form of exercise?

Any exercise that doesn’t feel like I’m exercising 

68) Are you afraid of heights?

Without restraints yes

69) What's the most memorable class you've ever taken?

Senior year high school creative writing

70) What's your favorite breakfast?

Eggs (over medium), bacon, sausage, chocolate chip pancakes, coffee

71) Do you like guacamole?

Fuck yes

72) Have you ever been in a physical fight?

Not by choice. Two guys were fighting and took me down with them

73) What/who are you thinking about right now?

How much I want to leave this class, and @hipstalexis​ because she told me to answer all of these lol

74) Do you like cuddling?

Yes!!!

75) Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?

Yeah I’m always dwelling on shit

76) Have you ever experienced one of your biggest fears?

Yeah I have been in multiple car accidents, and Clowns are a popular part of culture unfortunately.

77) Favorite city you've been to?

NEW YORK. I was only 7, but I fell in love and need to go back

78) Would you break the law to save a family member?

Depends on the family member

79) Talk about an embarrassing moment?

My roommate walked in and heard me having sexy time lol

80) Are there any causes you strongly believe in?

Rape prevention, Suicide prevention, Animal rights, Civil rights, Feminism

81) What's the worst injury you've ever had?

Either my concussion or breaking 3 bones in my hand

82) Favorite day of the week?

Thursday because I only have one class, and I usually don’t work

83) Do you consider yourself sexually open minded?

Yes, very. I’ll try everything once. 

84) How do you feel about porn?

Perfectly natural. I watch, read, and write porn

85) Which living celebrity would you like to know?

Natalie Dormer and Tom Hiddleston <3 <3 <3

86) Who was your hottest ex?

No

87) Do you want/have kids?

Yes I want 3

88) Has anyone ever told you that they wanted to marry you?

Yes and they were all liars

89) Do you get easily distracted?

All the time

90) Ass or titties?

TIDDYS!

91) What is your favorite word?

Antidisestablishmentarianism

92) How do you feel about tattoos?

Love them! Have 1; want more!

93) Do you have any pets?

Already answered lol

94) How tall are you?

5′4′’

95) How old are you?

21

96) 3 physical features you get complimented on a lot?

Eyes, hair, and legs

97) Is there anything you're really passionate about?

Writing and makeup

98) Do you have trust issues?

Fuck yes

99) Do you believe in love at first sight?

No

100) What are some words that you live by? Why? 

“I learned a long time ago that a person can stand just about anything for 10 seconds, then you just start on a new 10 seconds. All you’ve got to do is take it 10 seconds at a time.” -Kimmy Schmidt, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.

Because whenever something bad, upsetting, or whatever is happening to me I live by this and take 10 seconds to get through it, then I start over. It makes the pain and self doubt manageable.

[sodaretired-2]

I was tagged by the lovely @mystery-snail​ ~~

1. Are you named after someone?      nope. through all the legal names and nicknames, i’m surprisingly not named after anyone or anything. the first character of my chinese name, tho, is one character from a short poem. I’m the second to last character, so the next generation in our family will have the last character.

2. When is the last time you cried?      oh boy. is that the oven screaming? i bet it is.

3. Do you like your handwriting?      it’s almost illegible and i love it. altho, i do have a variety of styles to write in, my normal script is quite pretty if you squint really hard.

4. What is your favorite lunch meat?       turkey??? turkey avocado sandwiches are bae.

5. Do you have kids?       only the kind with four legs, a tail, too much hair, and that go bork bork.

6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you?       no. I think one of me would often try to overtake the other. I’m a shitty, high maintenance person who is petty and nitpicky af. tbh i don’t even know how my friends tolerate me.

7. Do you use sarcasm?       what’s that?

8. Do you still have your tonsils?       yep. altho i really wanted them out as a kid after watching that one episode of rugrats where Suzie gets hers out??? idk??

9. Would you bungee jump?       sure why not. i’m gonna die eventually.

10. What is your favorite kind of cereal?       uh… cinnamon toast crunch? pops? there were these little chocolate cereals that were shaped like half-coconuts i had back in ‘04 when I went to Malaysia for the first time and that cereal was the best fucking thing ever and I’ll never have it ever again.

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?       do i look like the kind of person who is not lazy enough to do that instead of spending two minutes squeezing my feet into my shoes every time i leave the house? i think not. fuck tying shoes.

12. Do you think you’re a strong person?        i think i have a really strong character.

13. What is your favorite ice cream flavor?        baskin robins mint chocolate chip. rite aid cherry jubilee and rite aid butter pecan. all other icecreams can go home. i’m also lactose intolerant so i can only eat a little bit ;u;

14. What is the first thing you notice about people?        clothes, gait, face, eyes.

15. Red or pink?        red.

16. What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself?        despite loving all my (excessive) jiggly bits, i really wish i could do more physical things without completely dying. other than that, my nails because they’re shitty and i hate them and i get really self conscious about them if they’re brought to attention. I often got my fingers caught in doors as a kid and that caused my nails to grow weird and bent.

17. What color pants and shoes are you wearing now?         i’m wearing black pants and squirtle socks.

18. What was the last thing you ate?         a bagel.

19. What are you listening to right now?         the whir of my computer, the laundry machine, the clack of my keyboard, and my brain telling me that i need to get back to work and earn the $$$.

20. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?         uh. this is hard because i hate crayola crayons with a passion. probably black or white, the most useful colors.

21. Favorite smell?        hot, fresh laundry and baby animal smell.

22. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?        lee (my little sister)

23. Favorite sport to watch?        basketball or curling.

24. Hair color?        black like the tar in your heart bb

25. Eye color?        dark brown like when your hallway lights are off at dusk and you trip on your way to the bathroom.

26. Do you wear contacts?        i just picked up a new prescription today!

27. Favorite food to eat?        the list goes on. food that has a story/history. food from your neighborhood growing up. food that has been handed down for generations. food with good company. atm i’m really craving butter curry and roti canai.  

28. Scary movies or comedy?        scary movies i guess. but it depends on if the comedy is tasteful or not. 

29. Last movie you watched?        the last movie i watched was a 7/10 star, Uncontrollable Love (1&2). like... it was almost there. almost. but it’s hard to find LGBT movies from China/Taiwan that aren’t almost trash, so this one was comparatively good! the main couple was kind of a train wreck, but there was also a girl who played a beard for the main dude who turned out to be lesbian in the credits so that was cool since there are RARELY any lesbian characters in LGBT media for east asia. I would say there are actually more gay and trans stories than there are bi or lesbian. and women in gay films often are antagonizing and one dimensional so it was nice to see a female character who wasn’t the worst. also the bts for it was hilarious and full of fuzzy feelings and the actors really had good chemistry off screen.

30. What color shirt are you wearing?       red/maroon shirt from my alma matter

31. Summer or winter?       winter forever because fuck sweating. 

32. Hugs or kisses?       i’ve been team hugs for the better part of the last 22 years. i want to hug you. let me nestle your ear between my boobs and give you a strong squeeze. i like hearing/feeling peoples’ heartbeats? is that weird?

33. What book are you currently reading?       I’m currently reading two books! The Handmade Marketplace and Color and Light for the Realist Painter. both are boring as heck, but i like learning things.

34. Who do you miss right now?       i miss my snakes. and i miss my grandma. and i miss my dog, tansy.

35. What is on your mouse pad?       it’s a black Corsair mouse pad with a little minimalist boat on it (the logo) and a yellow line at the bottom.

36. What is the last TV program you watched?       Weekly Idol with Pentagon and if that doesn’t count, then Criminal Minds and iZombie on Netflix.

37. What is the best sound?       lee and i have a collection of good sounds, but one that stands out right now is dropping coins into a glass dish. also the sound from that vine of the guy trying to flip an egg, but the pan snaps off the handle. also the sound of ice cubes clacking together, and the sound of the ocean, and also the iPhone wha-tting message sound. those are some good sounds.

38. Rolling Stones or The Beatles?       i’ve never listened to either and i likely never will, but beetles are way cooler than some rolling rocks. 

39. What is the furthest you have ever traveled?       malaysia, hong kong, china. i’m really bad at geography, but it was a 14.5 hour plane ride.

40. Do you have a special talent?       my talent is faking it until i make it, bullshitting on the fly, and knowing a little about a lot of things, but never anything important.

41. Where were you born?       california. but the lesser known part of it that tourists never visit. i’ve never moved either. 

42. People you expect would like to participate in this survey?        @starwiind @datothebiscuit and @carry-on-my-wayward-butt tell me about yourselves~

[addafewtiddelypoms]

I've been going through a lot. A heck of a lot. My dad died the morning before New Year's Eve. I woke up to a message from my aunt letting me know that he'd been in hospice for a few months, she'd struggled with whether or not to tell me, but that now she was left with only the ability to tell me of his passing. I was still for a minute; breathed in and out. Then I re-read the message. No matter how many times I re-read her words it didn't feel real--still doesn't. I called my mom who said she was just dialing my number herself. We spoke for a few minutes, she told me she was writing my aunt letting her know what songs my father wanted played at his funeral. That really struck a cord with me. What an odd thing, how incredibly intimate was that information, no matter the years they'd been divorced or the anger, hurt, and pain that was felt between them, my mom was the one who knew this. "Imagine" by John Lennon and Bowie's "Life on Mars." I listened to both a few times, and then switched it over to R.E.M's "Nightswimming." This song was my dad's favorite, something I'd always known and held on to because it was one of the only things I did know. I hadn't listened to the song all the way through in years and years. I wouldn't let myself because all I could think about was him when I did; his hands, the way his handwriting looped and fell and was both fragile and pained, the caramel of his skin, the way he'd put Nick-at-Nite on TV and fall asleep in front of it within minutes, the sardines he always had in his cabinets, the hibiscus flowers he loved more than anything, the bottles of vodka he coveted, his beat-up gray car, the way he'd put a toy cheetah on the dashboard as we'd race after the icecream truck, his pink bicycle shorts, the musty smell of old books, his lanky legs, his love for black coffee. I remembered all of these things and envisioned them all swirling above me while Michael Stipe's croon was heard in the background. I cried deep heavy sobs. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think, I felt numb and as though my whole body was nothing but pinpricks simultaneously. I felt everything and nothing; I felt heartbroken. The last time I saw my father I was in 3rd grade. I was a nine-year old little girl when he walked out of my life and never turned back. He was an alcoholic, was emotionally abusive towards my mother, and was never a kind man or father to me. He dealt, or refused to truly deal, with a multitude of demons. As a child he was abused by his father and so the cycled played on and on. He had so much potential. When my mother met him he was working on his PhD, had been an English Professor, had played college basketball, and wanted nothing more than to have children. Their relationship made sense. Somewhere along the line he lost all of who he could have been, began to drink heavily, decided to lie and cheat and succumb to fear and pain and resentment instead of communicating it, was overcome with jealousy, and then just as much as it made sense in the beginning, it began to make absolutely none. My mom got us out of the house, we saw my father on the weekends (a lot of the time during supervised visitations), and he became a minor character in my life. I didn't know him, didn't know that I even wanted to. When the alcoholism took over his entire life, he confessed to my mom that he no longer wanted to live. That she'd be better off, we'd be better off, without him around. He didn't know how to do anything but cause pain to those he loved. My mom tried to help him and work with him--for us. He lied and said he was dying of terminal cancer when truthfully, he was drinking himself to death. When the truth was discovered, he ran away to live with his parents in Mexia where he lived out the rest of his years. In September I got a message on Facebook from one of his past girlfriends asking if I'd heard from him. It came at a strange time because I'd been considering contacting him as I felt I was at a strong place in my life, I was back in Texas so could potentially see him, and I felt as though I wanted to finally make the first step to bridge that gap. Not to form a relationship, but to lay eyes on him. To see the man who was biologically my father, to make sense if at all possible of a few things in my head, to hear him and know that he was real, to have something to hold onto. I found his number online, called him, and when he picked up I freaked out and hung up the phone. He called back and left a voicemail. He said my name, said he was glad to hear my voice, and if I ever had questions he was there to answer them no matter what they were. I didn't call back. I don't know why I didn't, I spent many nights wanting to, but I didn't. And now I can't. I never deleted the voicemail. I haven't listened to it since, but it is there. I know he made some really bad choices. I know he wasn't a good father. But knowing that doesn't change how I'm feeling. I don't have many of my own memories. I have the stories of him that have been told time and time again by my mother, my sister, his friends. But I don't have my own memories to keep. I am heartbroken and I don't know how to mend it. I've been listening to music that reminds me of him. I've been writing down all that I remember. I've been focusing on the positive that for years I failed to see because of the negative that clouded it. There were good things, I cannot and will not forget that. He was remarried to a woman named Jessie. He didn't want a funeral so she isn't having one for him. She had him cremated and on the 21st of this month, she is spreading his ashes in Prairie Grove. She wants the family to come, so although I haven't seen anyone from that side of the family since before I last saw him, I am going. I need the closure. I need the goodbye. I need a safe place to cry and to be. I cannot imagine how hard it's going to be, but to live with not going would be much more difficult. I am dealing with feelings of pain and guilt. I am trying to suppress the guilt and know that his passing does not mean I should have felt less conflicted. It doesn't erase all that happened. But for my well being, I have to focus on what I do know and what I do remember and what made him my father and not the man whose name I felt uneasy saying. I am doing what I can do. I am taking it day by day. It really and truly hurts more than I ever thought it could.