#they do fascinate me. guy who’s obsessed with colonial history

[muirneach]

it is fascinating to me that the majority of people it seems have never considered that borders are just lines on a map? its just a piece of paper? not to have anarchic tendencies but like. it’s just words

[riddlerosehearts]

baldur's gate 3 thoughts again except this time i made a mistake while trying to save the draft partway through and lost a bunch of random screenshots and things i wrote 😔 oh well. good news is that this post marks the end of act 1 for me!

the underdark is so cool. i really wish i had a better PC because even with my crappy specs this place is so gorgeous and fantastical while also being vaguely unsettling lol. definitely not regretting my decision to double back after finishing the mountain pass stuff. also, i feel like elenion would definitely enjoy getting to visit a myconid colony and see how they live and how their society works up close, so that could be an additional roleplay reason for me to be doing this.

...you know things are getting bad when at this point i really think elenion would be okay with trusting a literal mind flayer to help him because wtf else are we supposed to do LMAO. genuinely at this point it sounds less insane for the party to ingest dangerous mushrooms at the suggestion of a mind flayer than it would be to let volo give any of them eye surgery. we have to get these tadpoles out of our brains somehow, i guess.

omeluum is actually a fascinating character, though. an illithid who broke free and literally just wants to do good and live a peaceful life? i'm surprised that i wasn't spoiled on literally anything about him before i played. i hope that's not because he's a secret bad guy or something, because he seems really earnest and trustworthy right now.

LMAO GALE PLEASE. i'm so glad i brought him along to the arcane tower.

oh huh, interesting that the history check here was a bard-specific option! i'd always heard that the bard colleges in DND weren't neccessarily actual colleges and were more just representations of just different schools of thought and such, similar to wizard subclasses being called schools, but apparently larian wants our bards to have gone to college! sure, i guess i can work that into his backstory.

anyway, bernard makes me sad. the whole tower is incredibly ominous and makes me sad for lenore, who we don't even get to meet... like she literally programmed a robot to give her a hug and emotionally support her on command!! :( i wish that when we went back with the mushrooms we could tell omeluum and blurg that lenore was missing, because they act like they didn't even realize she wouldn't be there.

obsessed with the fact that this is a bard option for when omeluum wants payment for the ring. and that you get to make him so happy that he gives it to you for free awwww.

i love how sometimes, the bard specific dialogue options actually allow your character to be studious and knowledgable about poetry and folk tales and music, which i was not expecting considering the way bards are generally stereotyped--

and sometimes they allow you to be a snarky little shit ASFKJGDFHJ 😭😭

since i went mountain pass -> underdark and i've already found the adamantine forge and done everything else it seems like i can currently do in my journal, i... think i'm actually ready to move onto act 2? i will say that i forgot to talk to dammon for karlach before the tieflings left the grove so i really hope that won't be too big of a problem. but if i did miss anything in act 1 (and i'm sure i must have) or mess anything up, then i think that's fine with me because i'm planning on doing several replays of this game anyway lol.

i went up the elevator, ended the day, and immediately mizora shows up and starts barking orders. i passed a perception check to pick up on her being desperate and this possibly being a chance to negotiate wyll out of his pact, and now i'm really wondering what would've happened if i failed that check?? would i have missed out on this whole scene where we try to negotiate with her?? would i have lost the chance to do this??

ngl i'm not so sure elenion actually would do that because it's a little too goofy for such a serious situation, but i couldn't resist trying it. and then i went back and tried the history check instead and they actually result in more or less the same thing--you recite an incantation you remember from an old children's story and she laughs in your face. where's the option to punch mizora in the face smh >:(

and now we get another ominous visit from the dream guardian! also, astarion told elenion he wants to talk to raphael and they told him they want to know what he's planning, which he disapproved of and refused to do. astarion why are you literally so hard to get along with omg.

this seems like a good place to stop for now but i am so excited to be making it further through the story.

[vintagegeekculture]

The Empire of the Petal Throne, printed first in 1975, was the first real “campaign setting” ever created in the early days of roleplaying games, at least as we would recognize it, e.g., the idea the setting has unique characteristics and history, magic has certain rules, the tech level means a wildly different equipment list...as opposed to just being a platform for campaigns, discovered as the characters explore and move around, which was often the default in most early tabletop games. You can’t think of the first generation of tabletop gamers without seeing the huge influence of Empire of the Petal Throne in nearly everything; in the 70s, at the scale games worked at, this was a big deal. 

As for the setting itself, it’s often fascinating to me how divergent thinkers tend to diverge alike. Nearly all “weird and different” tabletop settings (e.g. Talislanta, Skyrealms of Jorune, heck, even Synnibarr, the Uwe Boll of this subgenre) follow the blueprint of Jack Vance’s Dying Earth books, in that it usually is a setting of impossible antiquity that at one point was starfaring but reverted to barbarism, so a feudal society is surrounded by alien artifacts and superscience they barely understand, with ruins of 20,000 years and so on. That’s the world of the Empire of the Petal Throne, an earth colony that reverted to barbarism when it was sucked out of the planet’s orbit 40,000 years ago and into a dimension with vastly different physical laws. It led to impossibly stratified, priest-ruled cultures where social standing had to be factored into everything, more like precolonial India. Artists tend to make it look vaguely like precolonial South America, as their overly busy ornamentation seems to be visual shorthand in the western mind for “culture that is truly alien and wildly divergent.” 

The creator of the setting was M.A. R. Barker, a professor of Indian and Middle Eastern studies who was a white Midwesterner who converted to Islam and changed his name to Mohammed Abdul Rashid (before weebs and Japanophilia, the culture nerds tended to obsess over most was the Middle East, India, and Persia, just ask Harold Lamb, John Milius, or even Lovecraft, who gave himself the “Arab name” of Abdul Azhared and wrote “The Dream Quest of Unknown Kadath”). Barker was essentially every single teen dungeon master, myself included, with dozens and dozens of marbled composition books with all kinds of detailed notes on their settings. The interesting part is that as he was a linguist, he created artificial languages for his settings, and with Tolkien, who Barks is often compared to, it’s challenging to discover whether he started setting-first, or created the setting as a vehicle for his constructed languages. The amazing thing is, when he started writing about his setting, there was no tabletop gaming; he first saw it as a vehicle for a novel, then wargaming, then when D&D came into existence, he started running games there that lasted for decades and were published.

Barker ran a famous “Thursday night game” for decades in Minneapolis set in the Empire of the Petal Throne, one of his players was D&D founding father and co-creator Dave Arneson. The fascinating thing about early D&D in these days is how cliquish it was; everyone knew everyone through personal connection. Professor Barker was in the right place at the right time - the midwest wargaming scene in the early 1970s - to befriend the first circle of D&D gamers, impress them with the sheer shocking depth of the worldbuilding he created at a time when that wasn’t anywhere near close to normal, and get a release of a boxed set of his world setting in ‘75, making it the first true game world setting as we know it. 

Details in worldbuilding are great but eventually, there’s a point of diminishing returns. M.A.R. Barker reminds me of a documentary I saw called Jiro Dreams of Sushi where the guy who runs one of the most famous sushi restaurants in the world insists octopus be massaged for 45 minutes before serving. All while reading about Barker, you ask one question: does he care a lot and is he detailed, or is this unhealthy compulsion or obsessiveness? The line between being detailed and “caring a lot” vs. truly obsessive behavior is kind of blurred sometimes, like for instance, when you hear that Barker had a collection of over 2,000+ miniatures he personally created for Empire of the Petal Throne (rather like how sometimes the line between collecting and hoarding is vague). I mean, I don’t even think I can answer that because the line between the two is blurred: was Barker a genius who created a towering achievement, maybe the most detailed fantasy world of all time....or was he an obsessive eccentric with an unhealthy fixation, like a slightly less reclusive Henry Darger?

My personal approach to worldbuilding is to start story first and build the world around the story. Don’t create any details you don’t intend to be important or to create a conflict. If it doesn’t come up, it might as well not be there. Story comes first, not setting. If you want the finale of the first adventure to be in a volcano, put a volcano next to the starting town. Only bring up that trolls once invaded the world from another dimension if you intend for Trolls to return and their dismantled gates to reactivate, and so on. If you create a rule that sorcerers lose their powers when they fall in love, have one get in danger of falling in love. If you have a rule that all clones go insane, but cloning doesn’t come up at all, what was the point of that mental energy and effort, anyway? My point is, you can get away with flimsy worldbuilding and good stories, but never the opposite.

The danger of truly strange settings is that as there’s nothing to mentally compare it to, it all comes off as insane and disconnected - and that’s more a problem with tabletop games than any other, which have to have 6+ people “on the same page.” That’s why games are at their best at genre simulation and it is difficult to do truly unique concepts, e.g. “you’re all superheroes in Marvel Comics.” Someone, I think it was James Rolfe, once pointed out that nobody ever finds it weird or strange that Godzilla has atomic breath, because he kind of looks like a dragon, and breathing fire is a thing dragons do. But when Gamera, another monster, tucks his head and limbs in and starts flying like a pinwheel, it looks crazy and kind of hilarious because that comes from absolutely nowhere. 

Here’s one final question to ask about the first true game setting: can you run a game in it? I’ve found that in my case, the answer is no. It’s such a product of the distinctive genius/insane mind of M.A.R. Barker that it’s hard to see how anyone else could do something with it or approach the material. I admire and love Empire of the Petal Throne, but it’s the only game setting I ever got I haven’t used. It’s interesting that D&D never revived Empire of the Petal Throne; I suppose it was too much of a product of a single stubborn vision to be absorbed into the D&D cosmology or multiverse. You will not see the armadillo men with 8 sexes who defecate in public get a listing in the Monster Manual in any future edition. 

[l3monsoda]

OK Listen Up

ALL THE SPOILERS AHEAD FOR STEVEN UNIVERSE OK SO LIKE JUST SKIP IF YOU HAVE TO

Also very long post I got lots to say here

First of all Freaking Called it so freaking long ago!

I FINALLY found time to watch A Single Pale Rose and listen folks, all yall just about driving me up a wall with your constant screaming “OH Worst plot twist ever boo!” and “This totally makes Rose the villain. Wahhh” and “She totally was a manipulative mastermind who selfishly and single-handedly orchestrated the entire gem war resulting in the death of thousands and endless suffering for all of our heroes! That devious dastardly monster!!!” 

Ok guys chill out for a second and hear me out ok? I think everyone is missing some very important already established aspects of Rose, and now Pink Diamonds character. I’m going break this down slowly so bare with me ok because I’ve got about the whole shows worth of points and evidence to go through here because honestly crewniverse has been building up to this since like day one.

First thing I want to get out of the way is those of you who are talking about how after this there is no way to reconcile the initial image of Rose Quarts as a kind all loving compassionate leader who only did things for the greater good everyone around her. To those folks; I have to wonder if you have been paying attention? Because guys Steven literally went through a whole arc about this already, Rose was not the perfect amazing flawless gem that the original cast of the crystal gems always made her out to be. She’s not supposed to be viewed that way by us anymore. All kids grow up and find out there parents aren’t perfect, Steven included. Rose had secrets, she lied, she stamped out rebellion within her movement and quickly buried the evidence. and this is just the obvious stuff that is told to us.

If you really want to know the real Rose Quartz you need to be paying really close attention to episodes where we see her through the eyes of not the gems but Greg. That is when Rose’s true characterization comes out and we start to get some real insight into who she was. The Rose Greg knew was sweet and silly but also lacking in something that I think was previously attributed to her by sheer virtue of being “good” empathy. Rose is compassionate, she is kind, she genuinely finds value in the uniqueness and wonder of life on earth but she can’t empathize with it. Rose’s perspective of understanding is completely limited to her own point of view, she is incapable of seeing it another way. We see it in the way she handles her relationship with Greg, the frivolous nature she approaches humanity as a whole, the callousness she puts toward the care of a baby. She appreciates and values human life but in the way a scientist watches ants build a colony. 

She thinks humans are cool and fascinating, fun to watch and they do all these silly and funny things that are so much fun be a part of. To understand how Rose views humanity look no farther than Pink Diamonds human zoo. On the surface it is benevolent and on a practical level it is paradise where nothing bad happens ever, an actual ant colony for what was no doubt an early exploration by Pink Diamond into humanity. This displays again a form of compassion with out empathy. Rose loves humans but she doesn’t connect with them, for her there is a barrier that she can’t bridge and it stems from a complete inability to put herself in another’s shoes. I like to think Greg helps with this somewhat in a way that no other human companion had, his empathy abounds and his patience to explain things to Rose both the world and his feelings seem to have helped them make some sort of progress, but honestly I have always suspected the whole Steven experiment was just Rose’s way of finally bridging the last step she never could, Rose can only truly understand what she has experienced for herself and so Steven was her way of finally understanding humanity once and for all. 

Now at this point you might be thinking “See Rose is a villain!” but I’m here to tell you no. Rose is not evil, Rose is selfish. Contrary to what generations worth of Disney films have been telling you, that is not an inherently evil trait. A lot of very compassionate and giving people are selfish. See selfishness is often coupled with greediness and while the two can exist quite harmoniously within the same person they don’t have to. To be selfish or self centered just mean that everything is usually viewed first and foremost through the lens of you. Your needs, your wants, what benefits you. But this doesn’t mean you can’t do nice kind things and also I’m of the opinion that it doesn’t some how negate the positive impact of that kindness just because it was done in part to benefit the doer as well. All through out history you have astoundingly humanitarian and kind acts being pursed for selfish reasons. As long as the selfish motivation doesn’t impeded the good detrimentally, as long as good gets done should we really care why?

The other thing we need to take note of is this, Rose and especially as Pink Diamond, is childish. She literally refers to her relationship with Greg as “Play”. Every action we’ve ever seen rose take that was not seen through the lens of the adoration of the Crystal gems or through the almost fairy tale like narrative sometimes given to us be Garnet we see Rose take with a note of levity and lack of seriousness that has always caused me to call into question her leadership capabilities. Now when we saw this trait in Rose it manifested itself as charming and sweet (Most likely Greg’s influence since it’s in his memories that when we witness the most flawed versions of the woman but she was still the woman he loves and therefore very much a still biased viewpoint) but when we meet Pink Diamond we see it’s far less endearing implications. It’s important to note that by Rose’s own words, gems do not grow up and change, they come into being as they are. This means that Pink’s diminutive stature and two year old like tendency to throw a tantrum are not credited to her lack of experience but more who she is as a character. At the core of who Pink Diamond and therefore by extension Rose Quartz is is a child who has been made to lead. This isn’t something she was liable to outgrow especially since there is all the emphasis on not only the flawlessness but also the unchanging eternity that is a diamond. A Diamond is forever.

So when we add these well established and known parts of the character up what are we left with? Well for starters we are most certainly left with a huge heap of a mess of a war and hurt and grieving parties on all sides that could clearly be traced back directly is the defiantly questionable choices of Rose Quartz. Though the blame game is such a silly waste of time since you could also say that the fact that the other Diamonds gave the clearly incapable Pink Diamond a colony in the first place was in pretty poor judgment, also no one made the diamonds corrupt all the gems on earth including their own soldiers, they were clearly going to abandon earth anyway, they could have just left and let the cluster do it’s work and so on and so forth.

Any way I agree Rose has a huge part of the blame in the amazing tragedy that was the Gem war but this prevailing opinion that it was all a carefully plotted masterful manipulation meant to hurt everyone and just let her do whatever she wanted without consequences is honestly giving too much agency to a character that as far I can see from what we’ve been shown was regularly just keeping her head above water while busily preforming “Fake it til you make it”.

Pink Diamond’s Story looks to me to be this, A child who was desperate to grow up. She wants to prove she is capable and strong and at first it manifests in a desire to run her own colony, then she gets one and falls absolutely in love with her planet with a childlike wonder and reverence that can only be achieved by truly childish entities. She tries to defend this new found bauble she has gained but the wheels for colonization are in motion and she’s just a child in spirit and overwhelmed so she reaches out to those who have always fixed it for her. They are not in agreement they poo poo her so she takes matters into her own hands but hides under a disguise to evade punishment from her elders. Suddenly growing up isn’t about colonies or running things but being able to have her own say in how she lives and what she believes in. It becomes clear the other diamonds aren’t going to “Let her be a DJ.” so she does what every child does when they don’t get their way, she runs away. Albeit running away in her case involved faking her own death cruelly conscripting her pearl to silence and adding even more fodder to the fire of the thousands year long gem war but children rarely think too far beyond the consequences of their own perspective.

Her desire to live among humans, her abject praise of all things new, her obsession with growing things, her fascination with all things on earth’s ability to change, and her constant encouragement to other gems to go ahead and become something new, to recreate themselves outside of the diamonds expectations this all fits in perfectly with this narrative. Rose is obsessed with growth and development, because ultimately it’s exactly what she wants for herself. She struggles with it due to a lack of empathy, she tries her best to be good and do right but the truth her perspective is so limited that her action often end up tone def. 

What’s most interesting about this character to me is that she seems to be self aware of this problem with in her. That one line in ‘We Need To Talk’ literally haunted the moment it aired. Greg cries out her barely even knows her and Rose grimly and resolutely responds with “That’s a good thing.” Actually do me a favor and go back and watch the whole scene because honestly it perfectly illustrates my empathy point too. But Rose KNOWS she done messed everything up, you can see her trying to form an understanding to do and be better but she just lacks the tools.

See I’m not on here trying to defend the viewpoint that Rose is a wonderful perfect all benevolent leader because honestly, it a stance that doesn’t have a leg to stand on. I’m saying she is someone who wants to do good thinks she is doing good but just falls short of the mark and she knows it. She tries to fix it with things like working to cure the corrupted gems and taking the time to really understand humans but even she knows it’s not enough.

This brings me to Rose’s final crime, leaving all of the consequences of her past to Steven. See in Rose’s mind becoming Steven was no different than killing Pink Diamond to become Rose Quartz. It was a natural progression and the final answer on how to grow up, how to understand humanity, how to be better. Steven has what Rose lacks in spades, he is arguably too empathetic. Everyone tells Steven when he’s kind that he’s like his mom but actually he like what his mom was trying to be but wasn’t. It didn’t seem wrong unfair or even cruel in Rose’s mind to leave the mess of her past to Steven because she was going to BE Steven. Rose thinks that by becoming Steven, this half human gem hybrid she’s actually at last gaining the means to clean up her own mess. We know that’s not at all the case but again this comes not from a malicious intent but a lack of perspective on Rose’s part. 

Rose just like every other character in this show is not one thing, she’s nuanced. Honestly it shouldn’t be all that surprising in show that’s done nothing but take the time to show us that sometimes there are no villains just a lot of different viewpoints and misunderstandings.

Sorry for the long post if your still here my god you have my sympathy and respect.

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Croatoan- Part 1

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 1,939

Warnings: Typical Supernatural violence, angst, language, minor character death, blood, you know the usual,

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. Please, if you want to be tagged for this series, let me know and I’ll add you! If you want to be tagged for my other fics, I’ll add you! I want to hear what you guys think about this. If you want something requested, send it in!

Feedback is the glue that holds my writing together.

Tags at the bottom

Urban legends, bedtime stories, monsters under the bed: they are all things you hear about but never really believe. You hear about them from your friends and you think about them all the time, it never really leaving your mind until one day, you finally do some more research.

You ask your parents about it and they always say it isn’t real, that you have nothing to worry about. So, you forget about it for a few months. Until it comes up again and the cycle starts all over again.

That’s how kids live their lives. Always knowing the unknown but never being afraid because they know it could never be real. However, with the way you grew up, those nightmares came true and you had to face them every single day.

You didn’t get to have a shortcut in life. You didn’t have parents to tell you otherwise. All you had were guns and rock salt to protect yourself with.

And that’s all you needed.

But that never stopped you from looking up some of the world’s greatest mysteries because with what you knew, anything could be true. You got to digging around and much to your pleasure, you came across the Croatoan Mystery. You thought that was very fascinating and have been obsessed with it ever since.

How could someone leave a ton of people on some island, only to come back 3 years later and have no trace of anyone ever lived there?

“Sweetheart? Are you in there?” You looked at Dean who was at the counter of the gas station, buying some food and beer.

“Yeah, sorry, just thinking, I guess.” You said, shrugging.

“Is this about the last hunt we went on?” He asked, keeping it vague for the cashier.

“You two hunt? What kind of animals do you hunt?” The cashier asked you with a smile. You looked at him and gave him a tight smile.

“Deer mostly.” Dean grabbed his change and took the beer and the jerky he bought.

“I hunt them too. Once I got a moose but don’t tell anyone.” He said with a laugh.

“We won’t. Thank you.” You said, walking out of the gas station that was right across from the motel you were staying at. Dean immediately opened the bag of jerky and started to munch on it.

“Damn, this is good. You want some?” He offered.

“No, Dean, I don’t want any. Are you just going to ignore what happened with that demon? You were going to sell your soul without any consideration of who it might affect?” You asked, walking with him.

“Look, I was trying to get her on our side. I wouldn’t do that to you.” Dean said, looking at you while you two walked.

“Why don’t I believe you?” You looked at him with a sigh.

“Believe what you want but that is what I’m sticking with.” Dean said, walking ahead of you.

“Dean, please, wait,” You reached out and grabbed his arm, making him look at you. “I love you so much and I know you want John back. I know you miss him but this isn’t what he would have wanted. He did this to save his son who he loves. It would kind of defeat the point if you died trying to bring him back.”

“Yeah, I know you’re right. You’re always right.” He muttered. You smiled and stroked his cheek before pulling away. Dean grabbed your waist with his free hand and leaned down to kiss you but you stopped him.

“You know I hate jerky. I am not getting that taste on my tongue.” You teased, pulling away from him and walking to the motel room. You slid the key in and opened the door, frowning when you saw Sam on the floor, holding his head in pain. Dean walked up behind you and saw Sam as well.

“Sam, are you okay?” You asked, rushing to him. You got on the floor and moved some of his hair that was damp with sweat, away from his eyes.

“We have to go. Rivergrove. Another vision.” Sam said, squeezing his eyes shut. You looked up at Dean who was already packing his things. Well, that beer would have to wait to get drunk. Right now, you had another case to solve.

It was late at night and you’ve barely gotten sleep. Sam was so sure that Rivergrove was the place that he needed to be. You didn’t know what his vision was about because he wasn’t talking. You tried 2 times to get him to talk. Maybe third time is the charm.

“Sam, please tell us what your vision was about. You do want our help, right? I can’t give it to you if you don’t tell me.” You said, scooting closer to the seat.

“Fine, there was a dark room, a few people inside, and Dean was there, holding a gun. One of the guys in the room kept pleading with Dean that it wasn’t inside him but Dean shot him anyways.” Sam said with a sigh.

“What was in him and who was it?” You asked, looking at Dean who kept his eyes on the road.

“I have no idea. I don’t know what half of these visions mean anymore.” Sam said, looking at the GPS.

“And how are you so sure we are heading in the right direction? Aren’t there two Rivergroves in this country?” You asked.

“There was a poster on the wall of Crater Lake which is in Oregon.” Sam answered.

“Okay, there was something inside of him. Was he possessed? Your visions are always tied to the yellow-eyed demon somehow. Did I exorcise it? Any black smoke?” Dean asked.

“No, nothing like that. You just shot him.” Sam said, biting his lip.

“Maybe he had a good reason.” You said.

“Yeah, I hope so.” Sam said quietly.

“What does that mean?” Dean asked, looking at his brother. When Sam didn’t say anything, Dean scoffed. “Sam, I wouldn’t kill an innocent man.” Sam looked at his brother with his eyebrows raised.

“Hey, he wouldn’t!” You defended your boyfriend.

“Fine! Look, we don't know what it is. But whatever it is, that guy in the chair's a part of it. So, let's find him, and see what's what.” Sam said, leaning back in the seat, closing his eyes.

“Fine.” Dean said, looking back at the road. You sighed and laid down in the back seat, closing your eyes to see if you could get a few hours of sleep before you had to go to work.

“Sweetheart, wake up.” Your eyes fluttered open and you looked to see both Winchesters stare at you from the front seat.

“Can’t we leave and say we took care of the problem?” You joked.

“No, that would be cheating. Come on, Sleeping Beauty.” Dean chuckled, getting out of the car. He helped you out and you took in your surroundings. You were definitely in Crater Lake. You were parked in front of a wooden shop with a man who was cleaning a rifle outside of it.

Sam and Dean walked to him and you followed, looking around the town.

“Good morning, sir.” Sam said politely.

“Good morning, what can I do for you?” The man said with a smile.

“My name is Billy Gibbons and this is Frank Beard and she is Margaret Wells. We’re U.S. Marshals.” Dean said, taking out a badge. You wished you brought yours along but luckily, he didn’t ask for yours.

“What’s this about?” The man lost his smile.

“We’re looking for someone.” Dean said, looking at his brother for help since Dean didn’t have any idea who this kid was or what he looked like.

“A young man in his early twenties who has a thin scar right below his hairline.” Sam said, remembering his vision.

“What did he do?” The man asked worriedly.

“Well, nothing. We're actually looking for someone else, but we think this young man could help us.” Sam said.

“He’s not in any kind of trouble. We think you might know who he is, Master Sergeant,” Dean said, smiling at the man. You looked at the man and saw a tattoo on his arm that represented the Marines. “My dad was in the Corps. He was a Corporal.”

“What company?”

“Echo-2-1.” You loved how proud Dean was of his dad.

“So, can you help us?” Sam asked.

“Fine, Duane Tanner’s got a scar like that. But I know him and he’s a good kid.”

“I believe you. Like they said, he isn’t in any kind of trouble. Where does he live?” You asked, stepping in.

“With his family, up in Aspen Way.”

“Thank you for your help.” You said, turning around and walking with Dean and Sam back to the car. On your way, you looked up and frowned when you saw a telephone pole with the one word you’ve been thinking about lately.

Croatoan.

“Dean, Sam, look at this.” You walked closer to the pole and examined it. They followed you and frowned when they saw the word.

“What the hell is a Croatoan?” Dean asked. You and Dean both stared at him with your mouths open.

“Dean, don’t you know the story of Roanoke, one of the first English colonies in America in the late 1500s?” You asked, not believing your ears.

“Yeah, Dean, didn’t you pay any attention in history class?” Sam asked.

“Didn’t need to.” Dean shrugged.

“Well, story goes is that an Englishman named John White came to America to start a colony. I’ll spare you the details but he eventually left to get help from England but ended up coming back because of the war in Spain 3 years later. When he came back, the whole town was wiped out. It was like no one ever lived there. He left behind over a hundred people but they were all gone and there was no trace of anyone ever living there. The only thing he found was the word Croatoan carved into a post.” You said, pointing to the word on the pole.

“So, you think that’s what’s going on here?” Dean asked, looking at his brother.

“Whatever I saw, it wasn’t good, that’s for sure. But what do you think could do that? I mean, there had to have been some explanation why those people disappeared.” Sam said.

“Well, no matter the answer, your visions always are tied to the yellow-eyed demon. Maybe we should call Bobby or Ellen for help?” Dean suggested.

“Let me call Jo. I haven’t talked to her in a while,” You pulled out your phone but frowned when you didn’t have any bars. “I don’t have any service.” Dean and Sam took out their phones to check. It was the same thing with theirs.

You looked around and spotted a pay phone and hastily walked over to it, picking up the phone. You frowned when you heard the “out of order” beeping. You tried again but you always got the same result. You hung up and turned to the guys.

“The line is dead. You know, if I was going to wipe out an entire town, this would be my first step.” You said, sighing.

“Okay, then I guess the only thing to do is visit Duane.” Dean said, walking back to his car. You looked at Sam and sighed, getting into the car. You looked back at the shop where the man with the rifle was and didn’t see him there. You had a feeling that was bad but you ignored it for now.

The Queens:

@maddieburcham1 @ginamsmith @mogaruke @whit85-blog @inlovewithbja @spn67-sister @kdfrqqg @jarpadandjensenaremyheroes @roxyspearing @supercalifragilistic26 @mishamigose @cobrakai1967 @essie1876 @wishedworld @crispychrissy @laqueus-ludovicus @nostalgic-uncertainty @jerk-bitch-and-an-angel @potterhead1265 @starswirlblitz @untitled39887 @ta-n-ja @deans-fallen-angel-boy @scarletluvscas @notnaturalanahi @tahbehonest @stay-in--place @dreaminofdean @posiemax @donnaintx @mikey1822 @alexandriajanae4 @li-ssu @just-another-winchester @obsessivecompulsivespn @emoryhemsworth

Dean Beans:

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Series Rewrite Junkies:

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[adambstingus]

Cristiano Ronaldo film captures giant ego and strange, lonely world of being CR7

Ronaldos rivalry with Messi and extraordinary self-regard are to the fore in this vanity project but the suffering his success has brought his mother and the forwards sheer competitive drive also catch the eye

As a snapshot of what life must be like for Cristiano Ronaldo, there is one clip in the new film Ronaldo when his godson is being baptised and there is a small gathering around the font. The babys head has just been wet when the priest looks over to the tanned guy with the gelled hair and whips out a mobile phone. Any chance of a quick selfie? he wants to know.

Then there is the moment Portugals team are training at Estádio Moisés Lucarelli in São Paulo during the last World Cup and a sobbing girl breaks the cordon to run across the pitch in a desperate attempt to reach her hero. She is shaking, crying, close to hysteria and caught by one of the security guards. It is The Beatles at Shea Stadium all over again. Ronaldo hugs her and she looks as if she might pass out. He knows I exist, she wails, when a television reporter stops her a few moments later. What did he say? He asked me to stay calm and stop crying. And what did you say back? I asked him to follow me on Twitter.

It must be suffocating at times even if, for the most part, Ronaldo gives the impression that fame is his comfort blanket. The film is a remarkable vanity project and, even more than before, it is difficult not to come away with the feeling that Ronaldo must shout his own name during sex. He and his agent, Jorge Mendes, appear to have a relationship of mutual worship. Mendes, Ronaldo says, is the best, the Cristiano Ronaldo of agents and it is difficult to keep count of the number of times they get lost in each others eyes, reminding one another of their success and wealth and shiny brilliance.

Mendes sharp black suit, Rolex, phone almost permanently to his ear seems almost as hung up about Ronaldo winning the Ballon dOr as CR7 himself. It is a 24-7, twitching obsession, on both their parts, given far more relevance throughout the film than Real Madrids Décima or anything else, and it is a telling moment when Mendes and one of his associates can be heard muttering darkly from one of the Bernabéus executive boxes about the possibility the other guy might destroy everything.

That other guy is Lionel Messi, cast in a slightly villainous Ivan Drago-style role that he probably does not deserve. Its a card inside an envelope that can change so much, Ronaldo says of the Ballon dOr, describing what it is like being expected to fake a smile on behalf of his old adversary. To see Messi win four in a row was difficult for me. After he won the second and third I thought to myself: Im not coming here again. Watching this film, it becomes clear just how difficult it must be for Gareth Bale, signing for Madrid as the most expensive player in history, to deal with that planet-sized ego.

Other scenes are strategically laced with soft-focus Hello! magazine-style moments where Ronaldo can be seen playing with his son, Cristiano Jr, or dropping him off at school, but there is not always a great deal of charm elsewhere. Muhammad Ali and Brian Clough had great humour to go with all the braggadocio. Ronaldos style is not so attractive. Im not going to lie to you, he says, explaining why he went to the World Cup with an injury. If we had two or three Cristiano Ronaldos in the team I would feel more comfortable. But we dont.

A touch of humility every now and then would make Ronaldo much more appealing. Equally, he is as good as he is because of the way he is and a documentary of this nature, filmed over 14 months in his company, does show the enormous strains that come with the territory.

Sorry, your browser is unable to play this video.

Ronaldo: watch a trailer for the film.

At one point his mother, Dolores, is filmed inside a chemists handing in a prescription for sedatives because she can barely take the stress of watching him play. Ronaldo rings and asks if she has taken her tranquillisers yet, as if he is quite used to it. Its quite complicated to be the mother of a player who needs to win, Dolores explains. I suffer a lot. When he is playing in the World Cup she asks for her flip-flops and then walks up the hill rather than watch with the rest of the family.

It is this insight into the inner circle that reminds us it has not been straightforward for Ronaldo, and not just because of the fact he left his family in Madeira at the age of 12 to join Sporting Lisbon, with his first pimples on his forehead and braces on his teeth. Hugo, his older brother, now runs Museu CR7, the Ronaldo museum, in Funchal but, at 20, was spiralling into alcoholism. Hugo says it could have been him who played football. Instead, he worked in construction, and he says everyone drank in that game, particularly as he was used to seeing his father, Dinis, knocking it back every night.It isnt in the film but Dinis and Hugo resorted to selling Ronaldos Manchester United shirts so they could pay for more booze.

Dinis, we learn, was never the same after being called up to fight in the Portuguese colonial war in Angola. He came back very angry, Dolores explains. His head was filled with images of the war and though she says he always cared for his children she also says she became his victim. Dinis drank himself into an early grave, dying in 2005 when Ronaldo was 19. He was drunk nearly every day and when that happens it became hard to have a conversation, his younger son recalls. I didnt get to know my father for real.

As for Cristiano Jr, possibly the star of the film, Ronaldo explains that he always wanted my successor without going into any other details. His son is five, already doing sit-ups and still working on his pronunciation of Lamborghini, and Dolores takes care of him while Ronaldo is away. The mother? Its anyones guess. People speculate that it was with this girl or the other or a surrogate mother, Ronaldo says. Ive never told anybody and I never will. How a man in his position has managed to keep it secret is remarkable and, unorthodox as it might be, fair play to him.

Cristiano Ronaldo talks of his pain at seeing Lionel Messi win the Ballon dOr four times in a row: After he won the second and third I thought to myself: Im not coming here again. Photograph: Action Press/Rex

These parts are fascinating and, at times, Ronaldo comes across as so lonely it is a good job he enjoys his own company so much. In football I dont have a lot of friends. People I really trust? Not many. Most of the time Im alone. I consider myself an isolated person. It pains him that his father is not around to see his success but Mendes, he says, is like a father and a brother rolled into one. In Guillem Balagués new book about Ronaldo he writes how, to feed the competitive beast, the players entourage quickly came to realise they must keep criticism at a distance, or control it, create the narrative and keep him on his pedestal. Mendes is always there to fluff that ego and tell him he is better than Messi, and everybody else. It is far more than just the usual player-agent relationship.

Here, too, is the revelation that there was very nearly no Cristiano Ronaldo either. He was an unwanted child, Dolores explains. She considered an abortion and, on a neighbours advice, drank boiled black beer before running until she was on the verge of fainting, hoping to force a miscarriage. It didnt work and she seems pretty happy about that.

Thirty years on, the film released on Monday and put together by the people behind Senna does at least help us understand Ronaldo some more and the incredible drive that is needed to reach the top of his profession. It is not Ronaldos talent that stands out the most. It is his competitive courage, his absolute refusal to believe anyone can possibly outdo him and a level of self-obsession that makes one wonder how he will cope now he is approaching the age two years older than Messi when the powers gradually start to decline.

In recent years, he says, he and Messi have started talking to one another in a way they never did previously, asking about each others families and other polite small-talk. Ive started seeing him as a person, not a rival, he says. But we are always busting our balls to see who is better.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/cristiano-ronaldo-film-captures-giant-ego-and-strange-lonely-world-of-being-cr7/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/181635934402

[samanthasroberts]

Cristiano Ronaldo film captures giant ego and strange, lonely world of being CR7

Ronaldos rivalry with Messi and extraordinary self-regard are to the fore in this vanity project but the suffering his success has brought his mother and the forwards sheer competitive drive also catch the eye

As a snapshot of what life must be like for Cristiano Ronaldo, there is one clip in the new film Ronaldo when his godson is being baptised and there is a small gathering around the font. The babys head has just been wet when the priest looks over to the tanned guy with the gelled hair and whips out a mobile phone. Any chance of a quick selfie? he wants to know.

Then there is the moment Portugals team are training at Estádio Moisés Lucarelli in São Paulo during the last World Cup and a sobbing girl breaks the cordon to run across the pitch in a desperate attempt to reach her hero. She is shaking, crying, close to hysteria and caught by one of the security guards. It is The Beatles at Shea Stadium all over again. Ronaldo hugs her and she looks as if she might pass out. He knows I exist, she wails, when a television reporter stops her a few moments later. What did he say? He asked me to stay calm and stop crying. And what did you say back? I asked him to follow me on Twitter.

It must be suffocating at times even if, for the most part, Ronaldo gives the impression that fame is his comfort blanket. The film is a remarkable vanity project and, even more than before, it is difficult not to come away with the feeling that Ronaldo must shout his own name during sex. He and his agent, Jorge Mendes, appear to have a relationship of mutual worship. Mendes, Ronaldo says, is the best, the Cristiano Ronaldo of agents and it is difficult to keep count of the number of times they get lost in each others eyes, reminding one another of their success and wealth and shiny brilliance.

Mendes sharp black suit, Rolex, phone almost permanently to his ear seems almost as hung up about Ronaldo winning the Ballon dOr as CR7 himself. It is a 24-7, twitching obsession, on both their parts, given far more relevance throughout the film than Real Madrids Décima or anything else, and it is a telling moment when Mendes and one of his associates can be heard muttering darkly from one of the Bernabéus executive boxes about the possibility the other guy might destroy everything.

That other guy is Lionel Messi, cast in a slightly villainous Ivan Drago-style role that he probably does not deserve. Its a card inside an envelope that can change so much, Ronaldo says of the Ballon dOr, describing what it is like being expected to fake a smile on behalf of his old adversary. To see Messi win four in a row was difficult for me. After he won the second and third I thought to myself: Im not coming here again. Watching this film, it becomes clear just how difficult it must be for Gareth Bale, signing for Madrid as the most expensive player in history, to deal with that planet-sized ego.

Other scenes are strategically laced with soft-focus Hello! magazine-style moments where Ronaldo can be seen playing with his son, Cristiano Jr, or dropping him off at school, but there is not always a great deal of charm elsewhere. Muhammad Ali and Brian Clough had great humour to go with all the braggadocio. Ronaldos style is not so attractive. Im not going to lie to you, he says, explaining why he went to the World Cup with an injury. If we had two or three Cristiano Ronaldos in the team I would feel more comfortable. But we dont.

A touch of humility every now and then would make Ronaldo much more appealing. Equally, he is as good as he is because of the way he is and a documentary of this nature, filmed over 14 months in his company, does show the enormous strains that come with the territory.

Sorry, your browser is unable to play this video.

Ronaldo: watch a trailer for the film.

At one point his mother, Dolores, is filmed inside a chemists handing in a prescription for sedatives because she can barely take the stress of watching him play. Ronaldo rings and asks if she has taken her tranquillisers yet, as if he is quite used to it. Its quite complicated to be the mother of a player who needs to win, Dolores explains. I suffer a lot. When he is playing in the World Cup she asks for her flip-flops and then walks up the hill rather than watch with the rest of the family.

It is this insight into the inner circle that reminds us it has not been straightforward for Ronaldo, and not just because of the fact he left his family in Madeira at the age of 12 to join Sporting Lisbon, with his first pimples on his forehead and braces on his teeth. Hugo, his older brother, now runs Museu CR7, the Ronaldo museum, in Funchal but, at 20, was spiralling into alcoholism. Hugo says it could have been him who played football. Instead, he worked in construction, and he says everyone drank in that game, particularly as he was used to seeing his father, Dinis, knocking it back every night.It isnt in the film but Dinis and Hugo resorted to selling Ronaldos Manchester United shirts so they could pay for more booze.

Dinis, we learn, was never the same after being called up to fight in the Portuguese colonial war in Angola. He came back very angry, Dolores explains. His head was filled with images of the war and though she says he always cared for his children she also says she became his victim. Dinis drank himself into an early grave, dying in 2005 when Ronaldo was 19. He was drunk nearly every day and when that happens it became hard to have a conversation, his younger son recalls. I didnt get to know my father for real.

As for Cristiano Jr, possibly the star of the film, Ronaldo explains that he always wanted my successor without going into any other details. His son is five, already doing sit-ups and still working on his pronunciation of Lamborghini, and Dolores takes care of him while Ronaldo is away. The mother? Its anyones guess. People speculate that it was with this girl or the other or a surrogate mother, Ronaldo says. Ive never told anybody and I never will. How a man in his position has managed to keep it secret is remarkable and, unorthodox as it might be, fair play to him.

Cristiano Ronaldo talks of his pain at seeing Lionel Messi win the Ballon dOr four times in a row: After he won the second and third I thought to myself: Im not coming here again. Photograph: Action Press/Rex

These parts are fascinating and, at times, Ronaldo comes across as so lonely it is a good job he enjoys his own company so much. In football I dont have a lot of friends. People I really trust? Not many. Most of the time Im alone. I consider myself an isolated person. It pains him that his father is not around to see his success but Mendes, he says, is like a father and a brother rolled into one. In Guillem Balagués new book about Ronaldo he writes how, to feed the competitive beast, the players entourage quickly came to realise they must keep criticism at a distance, or control it, create the narrative and keep him on his pedestal. Mendes is always there to fluff that ego and tell him he is better than Messi, and everybody else. It is far more than just the usual player-agent relationship.

Here, too, is the revelation that there was very nearly no Cristiano Ronaldo either. He was an unwanted child, Dolores explains. She considered an abortion and, on a neighbours advice, drank boiled black beer before running until she was on the verge of fainting, hoping to force a miscarriage. It didnt work and she seems pretty happy about that.

Thirty years on, the film released on Monday and put together by the people behind Senna does at least help us understand Ronaldo some more and the incredible drive that is needed to reach the top of his profession. It is not Ronaldos talent that stands out the most. It is his competitive courage, his absolute refusal to believe anyone can possibly outdo him and a level of self-obsession that makes one wonder how he will cope now he is approaching the age two years older than Messi when the powers gradually start to decline.

In recent years, he says, he and Messi have started talking to one another in a way they never did previously, asking about each others families and other polite small-talk. Ive started seeing him as a person, not a rival, he says. But we are always busting our balls to see who is better.

Source: http://allofbeer.com/cristiano-ronaldo-film-captures-giant-ego-and-strange-lonely-world-of-being-cr7/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2019/01/02/cristiano-ronaldo-film-captures-giant-ego-and-strange-lonely-world-of-being-cr7/

[allofbeercom]

Cristiano Ronaldo film captures giant ego and strange, lonely world of being CR7

Ronaldos rivalry with Messi and extraordinary self-regard are to the fore in this vanity project but the suffering his success has brought his mother and the forwards sheer competitive drive also catch the eye

As a snapshot of what life must be like for Cristiano Ronaldo, there is one clip in the new film Ronaldo when his godson is being baptised and there is a small gathering around the font. The babys head has just been wet when the priest looks over to the tanned guy with the gelled hair and whips out a mobile phone. Any chance of a quick selfie? he wants to know.

Then there is the moment Portugals team are training at Estádio Moisés Lucarelli in São Paulo during the last World Cup and a sobbing girl breaks the cordon to run across the pitch in a desperate attempt to reach her hero. She is shaking, crying, close to hysteria and caught by one of the security guards. It is The Beatles at Shea Stadium all over again. Ronaldo hugs her and she looks as if she might pass out. He knows I exist, she wails, when a television reporter stops her a few moments later. What did he say? He asked me to stay calm and stop crying. And what did you say back? I asked him to follow me on Twitter.

It must be suffocating at times even if, for the most part, Ronaldo gives the impression that fame is his comfort blanket. The film is a remarkable vanity project and, even more than before, it is difficult not to come away with the feeling that Ronaldo must shout his own name during sex. He and his agent, Jorge Mendes, appear to have a relationship of mutual worship. Mendes, Ronaldo says, is the best, the Cristiano Ronaldo of agents and it is difficult to keep count of the number of times they get lost in each others eyes, reminding one another of their success and wealth and shiny brilliance.

Mendes sharp black suit, Rolex, phone almost permanently to his ear seems almost as hung up about Ronaldo winning the Ballon dOr as CR7 himself. It is a 24-7, twitching obsession, on both their parts, given far more relevance throughout the film than Real Madrids Décima or anything else, and it is a telling moment when Mendes and one of his associates can be heard muttering darkly from one of the Bernabéus executive boxes about the possibility the other guy might destroy everything.

That other guy is Lionel Messi, cast in a slightly villainous Ivan Drago-style role that he probably does not deserve. Its a card inside an envelope that can change so much, Ronaldo says of the Ballon dOr, describing what it is like being expected to fake a smile on behalf of his old adversary. To see Messi win four in a row was difficult for me. After he won the second and third I thought to myself: Im not coming here again. Watching this film, it becomes clear just how difficult it must be for Gareth Bale, signing for Madrid as the most expensive player in history, to deal with that planet-sized ego.

Other scenes are strategically laced with soft-focus Hello! magazine-style moments where Ronaldo can be seen playing with his son, Cristiano Jr, or dropping him off at school, but there is not always a great deal of charm elsewhere. Muhammad Ali and Brian Clough had great humour to go with all the braggadocio. Ronaldos style is not so attractive. Im not going to lie to you, he says, explaining why he went to the World Cup with an injury. If we had two or three Cristiano Ronaldos in the team I would feel more comfortable. But we dont.

A touch of humility every now and then would make Ronaldo much more appealing. Equally, he is as good as he is because of the way he is and a documentary of this nature, filmed over 14 months in his company, does show the enormous strains that come with the territory.

Sorry, your browser is unable to play this video.

Ronaldo: watch a trailer for the film.

At one point his mother, Dolores, is filmed inside a chemists handing in a prescription for sedatives because she can barely take the stress of watching him play. Ronaldo rings and asks if she has taken her tranquillisers yet, as if he is quite used to it. Its quite complicated to be the mother of a player who needs to win, Dolores explains. I suffer a lot. When he is playing in the World Cup she asks for her flip-flops and then walks up the hill rather than watch with the rest of the family.

It is this insight into the inner circle that reminds us it has not been straightforward for Ronaldo, and not just because of the fact he left his family in Madeira at the age of 12 to join Sporting Lisbon, with his first pimples on his forehead and braces on his teeth. Hugo, his older brother, now runs Museu CR7, the Ronaldo museum, in Funchal but, at 20, was spiralling into alcoholism. Hugo says it could have been him who played football. Instead, he worked in construction, and he says everyone drank in that game, particularly as he was used to seeing his father, Dinis, knocking it back every night.It isnt in the film but Dinis and Hugo resorted to selling Ronaldos Manchester United shirts so they could pay for more booze.

Dinis, we learn, was never the same after being called up to fight in the Portuguese colonial war in Angola. He came back very angry, Dolores explains. His head was filled with images of the war and though she says he always cared for his children she also says she became his victim. Dinis drank himself into an early grave, dying in 2005 when Ronaldo was 19. He was drunk nearly every day and when that happens it became hard to have a conversation, his younger son recalls. I didnt get to know my father for real.

As for Cristiano Jr, possibly the star of the film, Ronaldo explains that he always wanted my successor without going into any other details. His son is five, already doing sit-ups and still working on his pronunciation of Lamborghini, and Dolores takes care of him while Ronaldo is away. The mother? Its anyones guess. People speculate that it was with this girl or the other or a surrogate mother, Ronaldo says. Ive never told anybody and I never will. How a man in his position has managed to keep it secret is remarkable and, unorthodox as it might be, fair play to him.

Cristiano Ronaldo talks of his pain at seeing Lionel Messi win the Ballon dOr four times in a row: After he won the second and third I thought to myself: Im not coming here again. Photograph: Action Press/Rex

These parts are fascinating and, at times, Ronaldo comes across as so lonely it is a good job he enjoys his own company so much. In football I dont have a lot of friends. People I really trust? Not many. Most of the time Im alone. I consider myself an isolated person. It pains him that his father is not around to see his success but Mendes, he says, is like a father and a brother rolled into one. In Guillem Balagués new book about Ronaldo he writes how, to feed the competitive beast, the players entourage quickly came to realise they must keep criticism at a distance, or control it, create the narrative and keep him on his pedestal. Mendes is always there to fluff that ego and tell him he is better than Messi, and everybody else. It is far more than just the usual player-agent relationship.

Here, too, is the revelation that there was very nearly no Cristiano Ronaldo either. He was an unwanted child, Dolores explains. She considered an abortion and, on a neighbours advice, drank boiled black beer before running until she was on the verge of fainting, hoping to force a miscarriage. It didnt work and she seems pretty happy about that.

Thirty years on, the film released on Monday and put together by the people behind Senna does at least help us understand Ronaldo some more and the incredible drive that is needed to reach the top of his profession. It is not Ronaldos talent that stands out the most. It is his competitive courage, his absolute refusal to believe anyone can possibly outdo him and a level of self-obsession that makes one wonder how he will cope now he is approaching the age two years older than Messi when the powers gradually start to decline.

In recent years, he says, he and Messi have started talking to one another in a way they never did previously, asking about each others families and other polite small-talk. Ive started seeing him as a person, not a rival, he says. But we are always busting our balls to see who is better.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/cristiano-ronaldo-film-captures-giant-ego-and-strange-lonely-world-of-being-cr7/

[davedimartino]

New This Week 11.17.08

Conspicuously missing from this week's list of hot new music releases is the latest album by up-and-coming pop star Kanye West--whose long-awaited new album 808s & Heartbreak is, not to worry, coming next week!

Why has it taken so long? Experts agree that West's recent pronouncement that he will "go down as the voice of this generation" might be one very significant reason!

According to one informed observer, the press has yet again blown the lovable West's innocent claims well out of proportion! Because West, whose devotion to higher education has played a part in the nomenclature of all his previous works, made that statement in reference to the petri dish he was holding in his right hand! And it contained a hearty colony of drosophila melanogaster--or common fruit fly--all of whom strongly feel West to be the dandiest vocalist they've heard in their entire lives! But no one reported that, did they?

Sorry, Kanye--but once again, the press wins and you lose! Can't wait to hear the new album, though!

  Beyonce: I Am…Sasha Fierce (Music World/Columbia) A boldly titled album--after all, at least some percentage of Beyonce fans will refuse to purchase it because of its confusing title--but as always, a masterwork beyond reproach! It's a great time in music history for all of us: While Kanye West proclaims himself the voice of a generation, the much more attractive Beyonce announces that her career role model is Barbra Streisand and she is aching to play the title role in the inevitable upcoming Wonder Woman movie! Heck, aren't we all? Deemed by the label as "her most personal, reflective and revelatory collection to date," this record coincidentally arrives prior to the singer's starring role in the films Cadillac Records and Obsessed!  Clearly she is going down as the voice of this generation! Do you think there will be a fistfight?

Nickelback: Dark Horse (Roadrunner) In many ways the voice of a generation, Nickelback represents everything that is great about today's record business! They sell tons of records, they are loved by fans and loathed by critics--and if you ran into 'em in a bar you would avoid eye contact with them in case they were panhandling! For a band with their sales track record, naming a new album after former Beatle George Harrison's less-than-successful former record label might seem a bold move; as would, for that matter, actually being from Canada! But with Mutt Lange's sterling production, such great tracks as "If Today Was Your Last Day," and a legacy that is spoken of with hushed, respectful whispers in parts of Alabama and Cleveland, this is clearly the Nickelback record of a lifetime! Maybe even a mammal's!

 David Cook: David Cook (19 Recordings/RCA) Holy triple threat! First Beyonce, then Nickelback, and now the winner of this year's American Idol competition? Why doesn't everyone else just give up? So let's compare this album to the one released last week by Idol arch-rival David Archuleta! Both are by guys named David, both are by guys who made their careers on a TV show, and both are being released in the compact disk and digital download format! Additionally, when removed from their protective cases and bundled with fishing tackle into cylindrical lots of 50, both would hit the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean at the same time if released from a fishing boat simultaneously! My vote? Heck, they're both the voice of a generation!

 Dido: Safe Trip Home (Arista) For the longest time during the recent presidential election I was waiting for somebody somewhere to make the inevitable "take the `L' out of Palin" joke, but tragically, it was not to be! I think precisely the opposite when it comes to Dido! Frankly I'm glad she's back--word is that posing for this album's cover shot was fraught with difficulty! With the assistance of producers Jon Brion, her brother Rollo, and the remarkably named Citizen Cope, Dido's made a third album that may come to speak for an entire generation! Plus, the CD comes with four Dido postcards! Count me in!

 Mudvayne: The New Game (Epic) While some of us remember with affection the Golden Age of Mudvayne--when its members wore makeup and called themselves Chud, Guug, Rud, and Spug and passports were perhaps predictably hard to come by--there's no denying that this rockin' combo from Peoria are the voice of a new generation! Intriguingly, their former "tough" exterior is roundly rebuffed with this latest album, which reportedly is devoted to the age-old game "Pin The Tail On The Donkey" and features such tracks as "A Cinderella Story" and their loving ode to the Burger King franchise, "Have It Your Way"! If they're in your town, invite 'em to a Sunday brunch with your pastor and start talking business!

 The Doors: Live At The Matrix 1967 (Rhino) Long bootlegged but never sounding as good, these gigs--now finally available commercially--are an eye-opening and curiosity-satisfying glimpse into the Doors during the earliest stage of their career. Recorded in the course of four nights at San Francisco's Matrix, just a few months after the release of the group's first album, the band runs through much of that album's material and tracks soon to come, including "My Eyes Have Seen You," "People Are Strange" and even "Crawling King Snake." While fidelity isn't top notch, it's far better than anything released previously--and an excellent document of the band just stretching out and gigging rather than coping with the enormously legacy that would soon be theirs as the voice of a generation! Welcome and highly recommended but…no nudity!

 Belle & Sebastian: The BBC Sessions (Matador) One of the best bands of the last decade, Belle & Sebastian have released a flood of superb albums, singles, EPs, vinyl LPs, and probably cassettes as well! This collection, which documents the group's BBC exploits since 1996, comes in regular and "deluxe" servings--single and double CD--and is the sort of thing you'd want to have in your house and perhaps even play on occasion. It's quite good! Featuring a batch of material that only the group's staunchest fans have likely heard, it's simply the best representation yet of the high standard that have made Belle & Sebastian the voice of their generation! I'd buy two!

 Sammy Hagar: Cosmic Universal Fashion (Loud & Proud/Roadrunner) The charismatic Mr. Hagar was of course a longtime member of the less-interesting version of Van Halen--the one that recorded the famous For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge, a disc from which this new effort takes nominal hints--at least initially! Featured guests include his former Halen buddy Michael Anthony, Matt Sorum, Billy Duffy, and a cadre of aging Republican senators fascinated by Hagar's "red rocker" nickname and  his defiant classic "I Can't Drive 55"! In the world of David Lee Roth replacements, Hagar stands head and shoulders as the true voice of a generation!

 Shontelle: Shontelligence (SRP/SRC/Universal) She's gorgeous, she's from the West Indies, and she uses only her first name! She's got a great hit called "T-Shirt"! No one knows if she likes Fleetwood Mac's "Rhiannon"! Her debut album features tracks with great names like "Plastic People" and "I Crave You"! Is it any wonder that those in her homeland of Barbados consider her the voice of a generation? Also, she's cute!

 Il Divo: The Promise (Syco/Columbia) "We still get nervous about what the reaction will be like when we release something and how people will perceive the new record," confides Il Divo's Seb--but worry no more, Seb! It's the best Il Divo record yet! Featuring "The Winner Takes It All (Va Todo Al Ganador)" and "Amazing Grace," The Promise is a dream come true for an entire generation of Il Divo fans worldwide! Still, scattered accusations of their being a "better-groomed Nickelback" are alarming!

 Blake Shelton: Startin' Fires (Warner Brothers Nashville) Reports are that this a great record, but here's a hint: If you live in LA, walking into a record store this week and telling clerks you're interested in Startin' Fires might be deemed problematic!