#they cant possibly be real vampires

[singforbloodau]

[kindaorangey]

well i'm comforted by the knowledge that book!armand has some faith in the christian god (and, like, that this faith is vital to his character) because it means theres absolutely no fucking way they'd just do that one-to-one in the show and so we're one step closer to an exploration of show!armand's relationship with islam

[todayisafridaynight]

thinking about vampiric arakawas again just so i can make a 'blood-sucking politician' joke

[comas-are-for-sleeping]

hate when characters say “that’s not possible” to something right in front of them because of the empirical method

[godzexperiment]

i am forever entertained by how nix just- like major reasons aside... Hates vehicles with an burning passion. stemming from how he just seems cosmically cursed to get hurt from being around them. (that truck is rotted away, stationary and claimed by nature? watch nix get to be there near it when it's engine decides to combust)

[comet-forgot-you]

need some vampire amber freeman x human reader smut

ily for this omg

teeth

vampire!amber freeman x human!reader

summary: your girlfriend is gone for a week and d shows up with what you think is a shitty excuse.

warnings: 18+ pls, smut, fingering, oral, biting, blood sucking, needy top!amber, i think thats all.

a/n: what if i said i love twilight, what then. idk this is kinda silly at beginning and end but it gets the tiniest bit intense. do not repost for any reason.

amber had been gone for over a week without reaching out to you for an explanation. a week of you checking her location, spamming her phone, calling nonstop. it wasn’t like her, she could barely go an hour without talking to you let alone an entire week.

you wanted needed her to say something, anything. whether it was over between the two of you, an explanation from her telling you why she had been gone for so long without an explanation, hell even a simple “hey” would do, you just missed her and needed her to say something.

you spent your nights on the couch, attempting to drown out your racing thoughts with the sound of the tv. even that barely managed to soothe the nonstop thoughts of amber’s whereabouts or whatever reasoning your brain could possibly think of to explain her absence.

a knock interrupted your thoughts, you glance away from the tv. whoever it was would have to come back tomorrow. it was late and you had no interest in opening that door. a minute passes before more frantic knocks come from the door. you groan, pulling yourself from the couch and follow the sounds of insistent knocking on the door. you look through the peep hole and relief floods your body.

amber

its amber.

holy shit its amber.

you make quick work of unlocking the door, allowing yourself to be face to face with the girl. her jaw clenches the second you open it. she’s beautiful, skin clear of any blemishes it held before.

“what the fuck?” your mouth acts before your brain can stop it. amber’s eyes are darker than their usual color, eyes softening the moment the words leave your lips. “where the fuck have you been? you don’t text me, you don’t call me, you just disappear for a week, what the fuck?” your voice rises with every word and amber winces.

“baby, please. js’ lemme explain. can i come in?” you let out a huff of air, standing back to widen the door. amber stays still, eyes darting around the entrance of your home.

“you just gonna stand there? come in,” you say, raising your eyebrows at her random hesitation. she comes in, standing behind you as you shut and lock the door.

“sorry, just,” she lets out a huff of air, “nervous,” she finishes, fiddling with her hands. you turn to face her. shes so pretty and god did you miss her. you wrap your arms around her waist, resting your head on her shoulder. her body is tense underneath your arms. shes still, her arms make no move to wrap around you, shes just still. hell you’re not even sure she’s breathing.

“where the fuck have you been amber,” you say, pulling away from you.

“i didnt think it was real,” she mumbles, taking a step back. your eyebrows furrow. “thought they were joking and then they fucking did it and now..” she trails off, looking around the room for a brief moment.

“who did what? what was real?” you ask, her attention returns back to you.

“im a vampire.” you cant help the laugh that leaves your throat.

“yeah fucking right. you leave for a week with no reasoning and the best excuse you can come up with is that you’re a vampire? are you fucking kidding me? if you needed space, amber, you could’ve just said that, you didnt have to make an excuse up, a dumb one at that.” you shake your head, brushing past the dark haired girl. she’s quick to follow after you.

“im not joking. i know it sounds stupid, i just, i don’t fucking know. i just wanted to go to that stupid concert with tara and a few of her other friends and then someone did something, i don’t even know what happened, all i remember was waking up in the worst pain i’ve ever felt in my life and a thirst that water wasnt helping in the slightest,” the words fall from her lips at a speed you didnt know she could possess. her shoulders were stiff as she paced your living room.

“so, what, you went out and bit someone and said ‘hey, that was pretty good, i think ill do it again.”? do you even hear yourself?” you huff, leaning back into your couch.

“i know it sounds stupid, but its true,” she looks around the room, searching for some way to prove it to you. she takes a seat next to you, “watch,” she opens her mouth, canines growing sharper and longer in seconds and your eyes widen. your fingers move to poke at the sharp ends, a slight hiss coming from your lips the second it pricks your fingers, the smallest drop of blood forming on your finger. amber’s quick to pull your hand away, snapping her mouth shut. her fingers are freezing against your wrist. she takes a deep breath in, eyes closed. “y/n, im sorry, but it, you smell so fucking good,” she mutters, jaw clenching.

“what, a little drop of blood gets you thirsty?” you tease, the droplet of blood falls down your finger. amber’s gaze flickers to you, your eyebrow raises slightly. you shake your hand from her hold and hold her jaw with your opposite hand. “open up,” you mumble. she does exactly that, her jaw falling slack in your hand. you press your bloodied finger against her tongue and her mouth closes. she wastes no time sucking the blood off of your finger. a whine threatens to escape your throat at the sight. you squeeze her face between your hand and she opens her mouth again. you pull your finger from her lips, a whine escaping her throat in the process.

“y/n..” she whimpers, pushing herself closer to your body. “taste s’ good.” she presses her lips against your neck, your heart beating so loudly in your chest, you’re certain she can hear it. she pushes you back, settling between your thighs as she litters purplish marks across your skin.

cold hands meet the warm skin of your stomach and you gasp at the chill, arching your back off of the cushions. “you’re hands are so fucking cold,” you hiss, hands flying to tangle in her hair. she hums against your neck, sharp teeth scraping the skin. she presses a thigh against your clothed core, your hips buck into it.

“wanna taste you, baby, please?” you nod frantically and she rips your shirt open, leaving your chest exposed. the sight of her ripping your shirt open had you grinding yourself down on her thigh. amber was never that strong, that needy for you. it sent heat plummeting to the pit of your stomach.

she circles your erect nipples with her tongue, hands moving to remove your pants. “sh-shit amber. so fuckin.. shit.. so fuckin needy.” breathy moans break your words apart, “please.” she pulls back for a split second before shes back on you, both of your pants long gone in that tiny amount of time. “holy shit,” you mumble, arching into her cool thigh. her actions are quick against your body, her mouth on your needy cunt in minutes.

you whine the second her tongue meets your pulsing clit. a cold finger sinks into your greedy hole, a strewn out moan falling from your lips. you two had experimented with ice, but this was a million times better than previous experiences ever were.

she curls her finger in your cunt, tongue circling your clit at a faster pace than shes ever had. she was a lot quicker, and she used it to her advantage. “taste so fucking good,” she moans into your cunt, the added vibration sending a new wave of wetness to soak her finger. she pushes another finger into your soaking cunt, curling and scissoring them into you at an inhumane pace.

“fuuck,” you moan out, arching off of the cushions. it was so much, the way her fingers were fucking into you like she needed your orgasm in order for her to survive had your head spinning. sharp teeth poke your clit and your hips still, the feelings new, and so fucking exciting. her tongue is back on your clit just as fast as it left. your orgasm is fast approaching, heart besting erratically.

“gonna cum, baby? can hear your heart beating s’ fast. its okay, you can cum, want you to cum so bad,” her fingers curl into your cunt perfectly and youre coming against her faster than you ever had, juices coating her cold fingers. she pulls them out, lapping it up quickly with her tongue. she groans at the taste, vibrations causing your body to jerk against her tongue.

she presses kisses against your thighs, teeth scraping against the fat of them. you prop yourself up on your elbows, watching as she does her best to keep herself from sinking her teeth into your skin.

“you.. you can bite, ambs,” you mutter. amber looks up at you, rubbing at the skin of your thighs.

“what if it hurts you? i don’t want to hurt you,” her voice is full of emotion, yet so needy. “what if i can’t stop?” the question lingers in the air. what if she cant stop? what if it kills you? its a risk you’re willing to take.

“i trust you.” the words are all it takes for amber to sink her fangs into your thigh. the area burns, your head spinning as she drains blood from your body. a whimper leaves her throat, heat flooding through both of your bodies. it hurts, but at the same time feels so fucking good. your hips buck off of the couch for a split second.

you feel almost light headed, you were losing blood fast. you nudge amber with your other thigh but the girl hardly budges. she glances up at you, eyes dark.

“amber,” you can barely get her name out. she looks almost apologetic. “amber, baby, please,” it seems to pull her from her trance like state. she unlatches herself from your thigh, lapping up the blood that drips out afterward.

“sorry, im sorry, im so sorry,” she mumbles, reaching out to hold your hand. “taste s’ good.” she trails kisses up your body, quiet “im sorrys” falling from her lips after every kiss.

“its okay,” your voice is quiet, eyes tired. she presses a kiss to your lips. “felt kinda good,” you say against her lips. she smiles, pulling away to press kisses around your face. “wait does this mean i cant have garlic anymore?” amber rolls her eyes, smacking your shoulder lightly.

“you can still have garlic you idiot.”

[whereserpentswalk]

You sell items to adventurers for a living. It's relatively easy to get business in a frontier city like the one you live in. You were planning on becoming an adventurer yourself but an injured leg when you were young prevented that. But because you already know how to find items, and how they should be fairly priced, so it's a good living.

Not everyone who thinks of themselves as adventurers actually are adventurers. You sometimes have to sell weapons to naive groups of kids, who have no idea what they're doing. Useally you humor them, they tend to go off into useless places with no gold to be found, an old mineshaft that's been explored a thousand times over has become famous for such things. If they seem like they'll go somewhere way more dangerous than they should, you point them to the mineshaft.

Of course, most of your business is from actual adventurers. They tend to be wanderers, foreigners, a lot of ex merchants or ex millitary, or children of nobility who cant inherent, the type of people who never had the chance to make a safe living. Most of them are nice to you, and if they're not you know how to get them to leave.

You also know how to become a protecter for the adventuring parties who need it. Your shop is basically the center of their community in this part of the city. If a spellcaster is part of an illegal religion, or performing banned practices, you know what symbols to sell them to help them hide themselves. If someone is clearly a runaway slave or serf, or from a race that's considered a monster in this part of the world, you know how the forge the right documents. There was a hobgoblin who frequented your shop for a long time, who you sold weapons to, who you had to testify in front of the city sherif was not a hobgoblin but was infact a member of a rare subrace of elf that you made up to protect him. You may have also recently made an entire fictional category of magic legally real for the sake of protecting some necromancers you know.

There are some people you never sell to. It's not considered good principle to sell to people who would gladly kill your other clients. There was a group of warriors weilding holy magic who talked a lot about punishing sinners, they came back with the heads of goblins and hobgoblins a lot, and vampires, and humans of religions other then theirs. After they started bringing in more of their freinds you cut them off.

There are people who you wished you hadn't sold to for other reasons. There was this human noble girl who you sold a suit of armor to, she had run away from an arranged marriage and joined an adventuring party so she could be as far from her parents as possible. She seemed so excited to be in a big city, to be out in the world, she chatted with you for hours about an epic poem from ages long gone that she liked. When she came back to your shop after her first quest she had turned undead, something happened in her first dungeon that changed her, her skin was pale, and her teeth had turned sharp, you just remember her shivering and trying to cry, and muttering about how cold she was. Her other party members said they were happy she was more durable like this, they didn't seem to care about her outside of that.

And of course, there's the fact that every adventurer you know, useally doesn't come back eventually. When a full party goes you can assume they left town, but when just one or two from a party is missing there tends to be one explanation. Most adventurers don't have long careers, and mortality especially high for rookies. But you don't tend to ask if anyone is dead, it's better to just assume they went home, as implausible as it may be.

[crow-ur-beloved]

various jrwi headcanons because the worms in my brain (potential autism) wont shut up. no real plot spoilers except for one, but its marked :]

the suckening:

shilo is like vampire immunocompromised, which added to the pile of reasons his mom used to keep him inside the castle because she didnt want him to immediately get 37 different diseases and Die. (if vampires can have allergies then id like to think they can also get sick. i dont actually know if thats possible in the vtm system but i dont care they can in my heart)

genderfuck/genderpunk afab emizel. i feel like thats the only label he'd use, if he had to have one. i dont think hed label his sexuality because he wants to be an enigma. but he Definitely likes men.

bizley said in the qna something that can Only let me think of shilo as aromantic. maybe aro And ace... i dont remember what he said exactly aughhgh i wish i did...

shilo fidgets with his hands like all the time. his mother and uncle tried to get him to stop and sit still because it wasnt very princely and whatnot but my boy needs a fidget toy. i think hed go craaaazy with an infinity cube

i feel like me saying arthur bennett is a bisexual doesnt even count as a headcanon like i think thats just a given. i feel like itd be more surprising if i said i thought he was straight. all beautiful beautiful vampire men have to be lgbtq. its the law actually

arthur never officially broke up with mary. mans just Left one day without warning. probably left a note that said "sorry. -arthur" on it. i doubt he had it in him to say goodbye to her face or his reasoning for it (he thought hed inevitably hurt her because of what he is and what he did to the people he loved in the past, because bad luck seems to follow him everywhere... oughh he makes me ill). he definitely used finding a new lead on anya somewhere else in the country as a good reason to dip. at least, as good a reason as it couldve been for him.

maybe controversial but i 100% think arthur and magnus had a one-night stand at the beginning of their relationship, before magnus met jerome, and they never talked about it again and pretend it never happened. cannot explain how real this is to me.

riptide:

ftm chip who 100% innately knew he was a dude since the moment he could think. like when the black rose pirates picked him up, he got confused when they started referring to him as a girl at first. probably never got The Talk from them, so was Very confused when he hit puberty. Reuben reluctantly helped him steal to pay for top surgery.

since tritons live at the bottom of the ocean, they would have eyes that are far more sensitive to light to allow them to see better since little light gets all the way down there. gillion was Immediately blinded by the sun when he surfaced and still gets headaches from how bright it is in the oversea, but they've gotten better the longer he's been up there. tritons are built to adapt to all kinds of conditions, so his eyes have slowly been getting a darker bluish-purple the longer he spends above the ocean; they were originally more of a light blue-grey.

in tandem with the last one, chip thinks hes either going crazy or a bad friend because he Swears gill's eyecolor is different than last week but how could that be possible, thats not just something he can do, right? why would he be able to do that???

if gillion gets knocked onto his back without warning he does that thing that sharks do where they get paralyzed for a bit when they get flipped upside down. its scary because he can see everything but cant do anything. he also definitely forgot to tell chip and jay about this fact and scared the Shit out of them the first time it happened around them.

gillion can also change his sex like some fish can. its the reason he can lay eggs. i think this makes it safe to say genderfluid/nonbinary/generally trans gillion tidestrider is highly possible and even probable in this headcanon. what im saying is t4t fish n chips.

not to headcanon all my favs as trans but i cant help it. it is the highest honor i can bestow upon them. anyways. mtf jay ferin. ava always knew and was the first person jay came out to. jay was also 100% named jayson after her father and went by jay most of her life anyway as a nickname and just decided to stick with it instead of picking anything else. may was always very openly-supportive of her. jayson was as supportive as a generally strict, overbearing, unsupportive-in-everything father can be. jay totally came out to him and the first thing he said to her was something like, "as long as it doesnt interfere with your navy training," and may promptly kicked him under the table and made him say something nice.

kiras trans too btw. she came out before jay and helped jay discover she was trans. and that she liked women.

(spoilers for 109 and beyond) chip can't entirely remember what he looks like. everytime he focuses on the illusion of hiding that hes practically just a skeleton now, it changes just a bit. freckles in the wrong places, the wrong shade of orange for his flame tattoos, too much light in his eyes, too much muscle on his arms. jay notices it but cant bring herself to say anything. she knows the illusion is meant to keep everyone from worrying, but, everytime she sees something off about it, she just remembers what he really looks like underneath, and that somehow feels worse.

blood in the bayou:

all these bitches gay as hell. kian is pan. rands got a lot of internalized homophobia. rolan probably too. its the 80s, man.

apotheosis (haven't finished it yet so idk how true these'll be lol):

agender rumi. godbless.

also rumis a theater kid. he got the lead in every musical he auditioned for because he could literally just shapeshift. theyd make up a new identity and appearance for every role and get to know everyone on the cast and then mysteriously drop off the face of the planet as that person when the production was over and nobody would know it was them.

peter has actually tried All Kinds of things. weed. yoga. multilevel marketing schemes. you name it, big chance hes done it at least once and didnt like it. he doesnt know how he ends up in the situations to try it, either.

[armandposting]

marius is genuinely so fucking stupid and he's FULLY aware of this which is. hilarious. like he buys andrei, brings him home, molests him, goes wow this kid is so sickly and catatonic he's my PERFECT vampire child that I can do whatever I want with forever. and then one (1) day later amadeo gets dressed up all nice and is slightly less catatonic and marius is like oh no what have I done. that's a real boy in there I cant possibly do whatever I want with him and then turn him into a vampire. and this fight goes on with himself until he does in fact turn amadeo into a vampire after a couple of years of mostly doing whatever he wants with him. and then he's like well I shouldn't have done thst at all. yeah! we know! you knew! holy shit dude

after buying andrei:

one (1) day and a nice blue velvet outfit later:

[recklessblueie]

BLUES INTROJEJDJEJXH

HII IM BLUE! you can also call me blueie! impulse calls me that sometimes! im thirteen years old!!

my birfdates april 15!!

apaprently i cant spkll

i am blue annon but i made an account :o

i may or may not have drank gotham water and turned blue.. but thats okay! now my name fits ^^

i use he/xir pronouns and im ftm :3

very autistic 👍

my amazing partner <3 @aureus-boy

i love my amazing family!! theyr not real..?

i have 2 rats named gir (hes grey) and tablecloth (shes black and white and grey)

yeah theyr right.. dont drink gotham water yall

be silly and dont be afraid to gimmie asks i love them! :D

possibly maybe definitely a vampire now....?

pfp by @atlas-eclipse :]

OOC:

my main account is @leoinnit :D

thank u for reading YIPPIE

please be patient with me if i do smth wrong im new to this but if i am wrong (about smth serious or just lore) call me out on it so i can learn and do better

mun and muse is a minor dont be sexual!!

my timesone is est/eatsern standerd time

[ithinkdogshouldvote2]

THE DNDADS TEENS PLAY BG3!!! HOW THEY’RE PLAYING AND WHO THEYRE ROMANCING!

‼️‼️Pretty major spoilers for big parts of Baldurs gate. PLEASE read with caution. ‼️‼️

Scary: she plays a drow wild magic sorcerer. If this is before she and Willy broke their patron pact, then her dream visitor is Willy. If its after that, then its some really hot emo person. In terms of romance, Scary is likely drawn to Astarion after the vampire reveal but is torn between him and Shadowheart. (Also Wyll because hes actually GENUINELY nice to her but sincerity scares her so she doesn’t try to pursue anything with him even though she does actually really like him) she tries to romance the dream visitor (if it's NOT Willy obviously) but is pretty disgusted by the later reveal and later kills them. Scary plays evil until she gets to the nightfall and shadowheart doesnt kill the night song. After that, scary makes an effort for the rest of the game to be better.

Lincoln: Linc is just a normal human guy oath of devotion paladin. He’s literally just playing himself. He makes his dream visitor his dad which makes later scenes REALLY uncomfortable and he gets real-world mad at Marco like it’s somehow his fault. Linc helped minthara take over the grove because he got to the goblin camp before meeting the tieflings and he supports women. (#ally)(also she reminded him of scary and her character) but he massacred an entire people and then didn’t know why everyone was so upset at the party. Anyways he ended up romancing her. He DID NOT romance the dream visitor for obvious reasons. Linc does a FULLY evil run because he listens to women (ally) also hes: "too far in now to be saved anyways."

Normal: norm is a half elf, elf, gnome, dwarf, halfling, dragonborn and gith. He keeps restarting the game when he makes a choice he feels guilty about (Often). it REALLY bothers him that he cant make ALL of his companions approve of ALL of his choices at the same time. Eventually, he settles on a halfling college of valour bard. His dream visitor is (unfortunately) hermie. For romances, like Scary, hes also drawn in my Astarion’s “emo bad boy ness” and normal BELIEVES that he can fix him. He cant. He ascends him because he really just BELIEVES that there’s no way astarion will continue the cycle of abuse. It’ll be different this time for sure. It’s- uh- NOT. (Shocker). Also he romanced the dream visitor and felt guilty about it. Normal plays a good route (with the exception of ascending astarion) and the final party is bittersweet with his partner being the way he is. (Scary hears him talk about what happens to astarion and is FULLY like: “norm thats straight up toxic as fuck. LEAVE HIM” "ITS MY FAULT HES LIKE THIS" "no its NOT norm i am BEGGING you to raise your standards")

Taylor: oh you KNOW hes playing a tiefling. He plays a gloom stalker ranger because now he can actually USE those skills on the road. His dream visitor is his anime waifu. He’s romancing Lae’zel WHICH SOUNDS KIND OF SUPRISING until you realize the conversation went like this: Lizzie: “you’ve earned my respect and more still. You’ve proven your wits and your efficient and dominant. In and out of battle.” Taylor: “heh. It’s about TIME someone recognized what i bring to the group. I truly am the backbone of our party and shes smart for finally recognizing the value of my expertise. A WORTHY PARTNER FOR- (15 more minutes of monologue)” also he romanced the dream visitor and DID NOT feel guilty about it and was in fact, VERY onboard with the later revel. But he does end up turning on them and killing them to free Orpheus. (which he cried about afterwards) Taylor plays a fully good play through and gets the best possible ending.

[sirenthatmakesyouwantcake]

these are my thoughts on interview with the vampire episode 6 season 2

(3:47) ooh, maybe we’ll finally get some talamasca backstory (4:46) and even how claudia died

(7:00) well their relationship is going down hill

(7:56) this is an english theater santiago, no french

(28:04) noooooo, they are sitting in separate chairs now, i cant survive with them like this, i need then to have a good relationship.

(29:17) louis is

(32:34) is theri (mostly louis) only solution to every problem in france sex? Like, louis isnt talking to armand when he has a problem, he's just horny)

(34:41) maybe they wont have a toxic relationship, possibly the only main characters with out

(42:22) maybe theyll all make up. Thats probably wishful thinking, but like, if they would all share everything together, they might just.

(46:26) armand is looks so adorably at louis, assad zaman got the look so right for that seen

(47:01) i dont think i can handle what i know is about to happen, i know how this ends, but im still not prepared.

(49:04) How could he! How could he do this to us! The four of them could have lived happily but no, santiago had to go and fuck it up! NO. HOW DARE LESTAT, HES THE MOTHER FUCKER WHO MESED UP EVERYTHING! AND HOW DARE THE EXECUTIVES GIVE US THIS CLIFFHANGER, I WANT MORE, I NEED IT, FOR REAL THIS TIME.

Sam ried is back, as much as i dislike lestat rn, im still happy to see him

Armand is so manipulative, every time i think he has changed or is getting better, he goes and shows us that he's still just as messed up, louis at times too, he is not as bad but like, he really needs therapy too. Maybe they should all go to therapy together, and not just sit there traumatizing Daniel again.

I was talking to @certainunkownlove2 about armands hair, i think i like theatre des vampires armand is my favorite

links to other posts

S2E1 S2E2 S2E3 S2E4 S2E5

[glittercake]

WIP GAME

@downwarddnaspiral thank you for the tag to share some of my wips :) which... i cant believe i actually have unposted wips for a change! i normally just write one thing at a time and finish it. i cant say when any of these will be done though, but at least they exist lmao. i've been busy irl and too tired to write.

so. here goes:

The sambucky divorce AU: titled Moments Away for now (from the Mango Groove song) i have about 6k, redid the outline 3 times because it was just too much, and had some personal war flashbacks while writing it so i had to take a breather 😂 Excerpt:

Sam's mama always said love’s never going to be enough and he didn't understand how that was possible. He didn’t understand—as a seventeen-year-old, so in love he could barely see out of his own eyes, or as a sophomore on the back of a dropout, bad boy’s motorbike, or as a new father of beautiful twin girls with the love of his life—how that could ever be the truth. But he gets it now. 

more below the cut!

Next is a Sambucky Night Agent AU: based on the netflix series. it's basically cap sam/modern bucky but with suspense :) this is literally all i have so it might change completely:

There’s murder on the news. The Vice President’s dead. The nation’s in uproar. They’re saying he did it. They’re saying Captain America has committed treason. His face is plastered across the news, on every station on every street pole, his description is flying through the airways as he sits here covered in blood, trying to catch his breath. He didn’t do this. Sam can’t fucking breathe. He’s not someone to admit this easily, but he needs help. He needs help in a big fucking way. He eyes the number that dying woman stuffed in his hand earlier and hopes his phone line is still connected.

This one is a post canon fic where they run into each other on vacation and decide to have a little summer fling and then drama happens when bucky joins thunderbolts when they return.

Technically Sam wouldn’t be fucking his co-worker. Technically, they’ve only worked together like once, really. Bucky’s mouth is in his neck right now, and Sam can feel a bruise forming but he’s doing nothing to stop it because Bucky’s hand is also on Sam’s dick and it’s all going downhill real quick. So does he want to shit where he eats? No. Is he going to tell Bucky to stop? Also no. They’re on vacation and it’s anything but separate, like they threatened—in fact they’re plastered together—so something, something stays in Vegas…

then a fucking vampire AU?? which was very unexpected but I'm having fun planning it and writing little bits at a time. basically sam is a photographer looking to advance his career and bucky is a 100yo vampire. hmm.

There’s a sudden movement at the top of the stairs, so swift it’s dizzying. Sam can't place it. Just a gust of black night and bright blue, like the electric zap of lightning in a storm. Sam’s instinct is to retreat, wanting to back himself out of there. Overcome with fear. But something else sticks him in place, makes him hone in on the movement. A tall, slim figure, pale as moonlight, glides down the steps as if they’re not there at all, with the grace of an encroaching predator, salivating with deadly hunger, and Sam can’t move. Only after a few paralyzing moments does he recognize the shape as a person. A man. Sam realizes now that the flash of electric blue he’d seen is the man’s eyes.

anyway, that's it. i'm actually keen to get work done on these. hopefully i get some time soon :)

[kendrixtermina]

Giving Doctor Who a New Chance, Part 3: The Giggle

It's nice that they're bringing back some classic villain, but I really wish they had the Toymaker butcher some other language. The gag is just not funny at all when you actually speak German

Ok, that's an illustrative montage of a mightyfine chaos

IDK what I think of this - set it up in a way that it can be reset again.

oooh, Mel is back! As a 6th Doctor fan, I appreciate this. Did not expect that. She still got that perky way of talking.

Having seen the eps he was in, slipping over a bottle of Vodka is exactly like Sabalon Glitz would die, but hey, at least he lived to a ripe old age.

Donna just landed herself a new job. I guess there's that duality in human's fluctuating confidence levels again cause she glibly asks for double but looks ecstatic that it worked

so, Donna doesn't remember in detail, but she got a rough glimpse

the guy playing the Toymaker IS pulling off the creepy clown act pretty well tho

I really liked that scene between Donna & the Doctor in the infinite cabinet with the Doctor re-evaluating his life choices.

That's another thing that's been missing, that fucking Chibnall didn't get - that the point of him, at the end of the day, is that he's just some guy. Somewhat wiser & tougher than a human, maybe, but still fundamentally just dude with wits & confidence. A trickster, a flawed person trying to do the right thing that through trickery ended up with this fearsome reputation. I used to think of RTD not getting it as much as Moffat did cause he did like overly savior-archetype-like plots sometimes whereas moffat emphasized the 'just a madman with a box' angle, but RTD gets it in this scene where we see the Doctor cringing at his past self for things he couldn't have foreseen & now he doesn't know what to do in a world that doesn't follow predictable rules

Because that's what they don't tell you about getting smarter, wiser or even just older - the price you pay for knowing better today is cringing at the awareness you used to lack. thats very real. you end up thinking you should somehow have known or done better even if you couldnt have.

there's certainly some thematic rhyming with the 'narrowmindedness-plague' afflicting the earth

Donna's dad is actually right. Good for him to be wary of the Hot Hand fallacy and its ilk. Missed a chance for an epic nerd reference

I dunno what to think about the concept of 'shift to fantasy', i wouldnt have done that & really turned more to harder & concept fanfiction, but i suppose it keeps thinks fresh without being repetitive (they cant keep destroying and un-destroying gallifrey all the time...) & the show has always been the very softest of sci-fi anyway - at leasts its set up in a way that it can be reset again or let future writers pick whatever they want. though i suppose it depends on how its done like, if possible without wholly throwing out humanist values. You can absolutely be a trickster in a fantasy story or fight crazy things with logic; Infinity train did it to great effect. I mean, the classics had far wonkier stuff like actual Vampires & whatnot.

i appreciate Donna rhyming while defeating the puppet

"jingsaw out of your history" thing imply that the timeless child thing was an in-universe retcon of sorts? Oh please. I mean I could kinda sorta accept 13 is she literally wasn't really the same character.

between this & the last episode it's pretty close anyway to the "every single backstory is true because of timey wimey ball" thing from the expanded universe fixed, on-screen canon. That I could live with. It's potentially deeply interesting that by virtue of getting tangled up in all the timelines the Doctor has in some ways been to many possible futures & possible versions of reality.

Former companions werent affected by the giggle thing cause it was a retroactive change made by the toymaker upon getting free

It's kinda sad that we'll never get to see the battle between the Master and the Toymaker because that must really have been something. Like two Jokers or Phantoms of the Opera fighting.

this is like when Q showed up on the bridge of the enterprise. Only much deadlier. I appreciate that the scene never stops feeling actually menacing.

I like how Mel also comes in to hold his hand, too, she's for realsies. (I guess this is how she makes up for making him drink all that carrot juice)

The "Alons-y" is a niftly little contrast/ bookend with 10s exit

My headcanon is that bi-generation absolutely WAS a myth, but that this is an extension of the whole breach in the logic/edge of reality storyarc being set up here, or really just the Toymaker thinking it would be fun to double them infinitely

I like how the Doctor mocks the Toymaker's fake accent with 'the ball' thing

The advantage with the ball game is, of course, that Fifteen has already seen it. He's fabulous alright.

I appreciate how they climb on each other at some point

I don't envy Kate, watching this absurd thing... humanity already got somewhat good at taking Sci-Fi threats on their own, but this they don't have context for. Maybe UNIT is gonna need a vault of magical artifacts now. I suppose you can play with that for a few seasons. Like how a contrast of fantasy & sci-fi elements worked in Madoka.

I like how Donna is casually putting her arm around 15

I guess 15 has reached that point where rather than cringe at your younger self you're able to have compassion. That's a good arc, actually.

aaand of course there's the obligatory sequel hook for the Master's return, to the surprise of no one

I like how the years with the lost memory weren't completely lost but Donna still learned something from them that allows her to send this message now

Soo Fifteen is basically taking advantage of the cartoon logic still being in effect until the end of the episode to duplicate the TARDIS. I bet it only worked because he picked the silliest possible hammer.

I appreciate how 15 makes sure to get one last Donna hug.

I do like that it kinda came down to self-love, self-compassion & knowing when to take a restorative break & all that. That's an important message these days.

So, the Nobles just deadass adopted the Doctor & Mel. Makes all the sense.

I always thought of Mel & the Doctor's dynamic as sibling-like (as opposed to Peri & the Doctor having a 'tsundere couple' energy & Ace who of course had a teacher/student thing), so I feel vindicated.

Also I appreciate how an older woman who didn't have kids but spent her life traveling & adventuring & doing what she wanted, & then ended up feeling a bit lonely because of it here simply ends up not lonely by finding friends / found family. Cause that's the fucking annoying gotcha they always hurl at you "Oh if you don't have kids & live the life you want you'll be lonely!" As if you can't have friends. Also, plenty of ppl who do have kids wind up lonely because the kids end up hating them.

I'm all for the Doctor catching a break. Very touching, honestly. & he's like actually a point where he wouldn't just run off & get side-tracked or brood on the inevitability of its end. (like he would have when spent those years with River)

Also sets an interesting background for 15 of course, as he'll be coming out of it 'fully rested', in a sense.

So, yeah, I do think I'm looking forward to what 15 will get up to. It was sort of a great way to introduce him in such a way that ppl will instantly like him for how he comforts his past self here.

It's also probably the ideal ending for Donna, cause, much like Rose & Clara she wanted to stay forever, & maybe now that she has a daughter & other responsibilities she won't want the big danger all the time, but the Unit Job & living with the Doctor in a house? That's prolly what she would have wanted.

(I wonder if they'll end up running into Martha & Mickey at her job, since Donna & Martha were buds that time they met. )

[new-reading]

What are some of your favorite books or books you'd recommend?

@healerqueen

I've listened to all of the following at least five times lol hopefully some of them are new to you! But I saw you were an author so depending on what you write (what do you write?) they might all be familiar to you lol. * I admit I have not listened to the non fiction ones (are retellings of ancient Greek and Norse religious stories considered nonfiction if they're told in sort of an educational way?) more than once or twice.

* understood betsy (wholesome)

* Anne of Green gables (wholesome)

* pride and prejudice (rom with some com)

* northhanger abby (com with some rom)

* Ivanhoe (medieval based action sort of with definite com and a little rom)

* spells swords and stealth (series) (DnD world + regular world - light hearted)

* terry pratchet' Discworld (super lighthearted, magic. Skip through the description of the elephant and the turtle if you're not into it. Idk which books though I'm going through them all now for the first time and I can't keep their names in my head. The first two, a couple of the ones with rincewind, a couple of the ones with the witches and a couple of the ones with the night watch I re-listened to immediately after finishing). Not gonna lie, there are like five or six jokes hes made in the first 12 book that I absolutely hate and he wouldn't have gotten away with now.

* those wizarding books by she who should not be named on tumblr

* CANT BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION MY HOMIE RICK RIORDAN ) (I do not actually know him) LITERALLY ALL HIS GREEK/ROMAN BOOKS! I didn't realize he'd done any after the first five and goodness was I wrong. Greek/Roman brought to modern day? Action adventure fun with some more serious aspects.

* the marvelous land of snergs read by Stephen fry - I'm specific cuz I think one of the versions is an adaptation and I don't know which one it is (light hearted journey to magical land)

* little house on the prairie series up to little town on the prairie. That one starts to go in a direction I get less interested in. (Wholesome)

* The time travelers guide to medieval England - non fiction, admittedly only listened once but it was fun

* Unconventional Heroes series by L G Estrella (light hearted magical land fun group. The characters are a little overpowered sometimes but it's still a nice casual fun read/listen)

ianother one where at some point the main group

* the adventures of huckleberry fin! Light hearted adventure 1900?

*Matilda (light hearted sweet some magic)

* the da vinci code/angels and demons (don't recommend if you have any triggers, I skip parts) (sort of who done it + race to prevent a crisis + a cool sort of armchair indiana Jones )

* the utterly uninteresting and unadventurous tales of Fred the vampire accountant (light easygoing fantasy in modern world - at some point main group does start feeling overpowered)

* around the world in 80 days (most lighthearted of the three of jules's works that I know), journey to the center of the earth, 20000 leagues under the sea. (all sort of fun and adventurey and slightly fantastic but not magical, probably has a main character who's a professor or a scientist or eccentric intellect, 1880s maybe?)

* Pearls and Perils by drew Hayes (super fun comedy adventure sort of with a rag tag group and possibly a deity on an island modern day)

* the case of the damaged detective and the rest of the series - super fun sort of sherlock homes but modern day. Also drew Hayes.

* Edgedancer by Brandon Sanderson - magical other world with a hilariously irreverent main character and her sweetly stuffy partner in action who's a plant.

*the wizards butler by Nathan Lowell. Gotta warn you the main character does start off as a womanizer but it's just for character development and nothing very racy happens. Magic in the real world, mild action, adventure, and romance with some mystery.

* heroes by Stephen fry, troy by Stephen fry, mythos by Stephen fry, Norse mythology by Neil gaimon - all retellings of ancient religious stories (and a story about a war) for a modern reader. Heroes and mythos are about ancient Greek stuff

* the secret garden (sweet maybe 1870s?)

* CANT BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT MY BOY JRR TOLKIEN!!! Lotr, ttt, rotk

And things that should also be mentioned:

* twilight (vampires modern day romance)

* eragon (dragons other world action adventure)

* interview with a vampire (past and present?)

*the christi Agatha that took place on the nile and the one on the train (orient express) theyre who done it's

[borathae]

Chapter 24

is that jimin? unless we still havent saved yoongi's number? BALLET YEAH THATS JIMIN

Do they want you to wear ballet shoes? Was it a typo? Or nonsense babbling of a very bad AI?  fr u wont get it if ur the one who got that message

damn we are bad girl, yoongi sorry not sorry wait what does he want fuck

he looks different? is joon spying? ok no names hm got it WTF IS THAT WOMAN he cant get to her mind right? like random people she must be a vampire/human under his control not random ha this isnt x men lol

WHAT ARE U DOING NOW CONTROLLING AGAIN or is she fr sus?

wow she left thanks jimin ig

give me your neck and I’ll carve a bloody hole into it with a chainsaw and maybe then we’ll talk about just one bite.” EXACTLY TELL HIM SIS YES HE APOLOGIZED

that’s amazing Park Jimin needs my help.” XD “Maybe he doesn’t want to leave with you, given how you killed his girlfriend in front of his eyes.” yeah jimin have u ever thought of the slight possibility of such a thing? no? hmm ok

I’ve noticed it happening to me ever since I took that awful ring from you.” oh? so he didnt know it before? only figured it out now from the ring? how can i trust ur ass bruh?

um going back there again?? oh pinky promise yeah sure lets die haha very cool 😃😃

You’d rather be ambushed by granny vampire?” You hate yourself for laughing. nah i laughed too dont worry

“Don’t you dare to think I’m into you.” nobody thinks ur 🤡

“If you say this again, I’ll fucking kill you” haha bingo, we knew that was ur worry

“Ah, what the fuck?” Jimin gasps, stumbling and with his hand falling to his ribs, “why did you punch me?” THANKS YOONGI AND YES GO GURL

You have truly never seen him that lost for words before. she really got him good haha

SHIT YOONGI WTF EXACTLY U HURT HER NOT JIMIN NOW GREAT READ HER MIND TOO AAAAH

FUCK AAH nothing makes sense, just ah they hurt people yes, but something is weird, why is tae and jimin like that it just doesnt add up

ok breaking another rule lets go haha 😭

fuck taht went bad too, can somebody hear everything out gosh

ha yup knew that emma was never coming back cuz vampires am i right gays

YES WE ARE HAVING A TALK FINALLY, YALL WE TALKED WITH YOONGI NOT BANTER MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

YES IT WAS YOONGI oh the mask was really not jimin, i thought he was lying.

ok i get why they dont want her there, she is just a human who cant heal like them and not that great of a fighter. but something is still fishy, let her try save tae and unfortunately it looks like u cant watch her. or idk man fuck

YEAH HE PROMISED HE WOULD TRY

is that jimin? unless we still havent saved yoongi's number? BALLET YEAH THATS JIMIN

jdjf honestly how rude boongie has been acting i wouldn't be surprised if we didn't HAHHAHA

he looks different? is joon spying? ok no names hm got it WTF IS THAT WOMAN he cant get to her mind right? like random people she must be a vampire/human under his control not random ha this isnt x men lol

hhaah the confusion is real 😌

WHAT ARE U DOING NOW CONTROLLING AGAIN or is she fr sus?

SHE IS DEFINITELY SUS

give me your neck and I’ll carve a bloody hole into it with a chainsaw and maybe then we’ll talk about just one bite.” EXACTLY TELL HIM SIS YES HE APOLOGIZED

I love her <3

I’ve noticed it happening to me ever since I took that awful ring from you.” oh? so he didnt know it before? only figured it out now from the ring? how can i trust ur ass bruh?

no but REMEMBER that the ring fights off mind control helloooooo

You’d rather be ambushed by granny vampire?” You hate yourself for laughing. nah i laughed too dont worry

he is so sassy nfadsnf i love him

“Ah, what the fuck?” Jimin gasps, stumbling and with his hand falling to his ribs, “why did you punch me?” THANKS YOONGI AND YES GO GURL

goooood I miss their banter so much 😭😭

FUCK AAH nothing makes sense, just ah they hurt people yes, but something is weird, why is tae and jimin like that it just doesnt add up

the confusion is real 😭

YES WE ARE HAVING A TALK FINALLY, YALL WE TALKED WITH YOONGI NOT BANTER MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

THIS SCENE IS SO DEAR TO ME NO JOKE

YES IT WAS YOONGI oh the mask was really not jimin, i thought he was lying.

the plottwist of the century