#they are very stupid and enthusiastic or *passive aggressively* enthusiastic | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

recreationalfanfics · 2 years ago

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Hiya! So happy to see another loki fan!

Could you do him and a bubbly, optimistic y/n! Real puppy dog energy, but she's also kind of clever. Like people underestimate her because they think shes ditzy, maybe loki did at first too, but she really just sees the bright side of stuff and is high energy, so they're actually really smart!

Srry this was so long!!! Have a great day!

YES! I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS PROMPT SO MUCH THANK YOU♡

- CONSIDERING THE EGO OF THIS MAN, HE DEFINETLY HAD THE GALL TO UNDERESTIMATE YOU. I mean, look at you. So bright eyed and happy, you were chatting with your fellow peers and your enemies alike knowing full well you're entering this contest that will costs the lives of many people.

- He thought you were niave really or maybe just really stupid. I mean, you often got lost in the arena, you were so unaware of your surroundings at times that you would just casually walk into objects and then proceeded to apologize to them, and overall seemed so happy and enthusiastic even though you were losing.

- He never saw your frown fall and he always found that interesting, as your fellow human was sent to Niflhiem, there was no sadness in your eyes. Obviously no one else noticed because they were too busy grieving but Loki did and thats how his interest in you starts.

- One day he corners you to ask about why you smiled despite the fact that it looked like humanity was doomed. No one knows what happened, Brunhilde just watched as you walked away and Loki followed you.

- Since then, people are so baffled by how close you and the God of Mischief are now. The way you two started talking to one another as if you weren't on completely opposite sides, decorating his nails with nail polish that you somehow acquired, and overall just glued to the hip.

- Sometimes you're a bit clumsy, like when your eyes light up when you look at Loki and run over to him, only to trip over your own feet but he just teleports and grabs you by your waist by teasing you about how clumsy you are.

- You always find his tricks amusing and even let him know what he could do to make them even "funnier", you're the only person who actually has a sense of humor because while Ragnarok was fun, everyone was so terribly serious sometimes but at least you knew how to have a little fun.

- Loves how openly affectionate you are with him, he is pretty touchy but not obnoxiously so, yeah he'll have his arms wrapped around you here and there but you're the one who just grabs his face when he floats upside down and covers it kisses or playing with his hair absentmindedly as he tells you about his latest prank he pulled.

- He also never really annoys you, even when he is being a little mean at times. The gods see it go over your head and they feel bad for you but they don't actually know when he says passive-aggressive things, you're not really bothered because you know he's a sore loser and you had just finished beating him in a game that you were simply too good at. He never goes too far but its clear he's still sulking.

- The gods aren't sure how but you've somehow managed to get Loki wrapped around your little finger almost as much as you're wrapped around his. Some gods admit that it's strange to see Loki so absent but they assume that he's just manipulating you and you just happen to be the new toy he's playing with since you seem like you mean well, but they also don't think you're all that bright.

- That doesn't mean that they don't enjoy your company, you're very fun to talk to but conversations are always cut short because of Loki's possessiveness.

- He especially hates it when Hermes mentions some boring fact about Greece and what it was like back in the day and somehow you get interested and start asking him questions and Loki just rolls his eyes in annoyance as this conversation goes on for LONGER THAN HE WANTS IT TOO.

- Zeus gets curious as to why Brunhilde lets you near the God's so much or why she let's you near Loki in general.

- Zeus: "If I were you, I'd be very concerned or at the very least, pick a new champion. Who knows what sick game Loki is playing at?"

- Brunhilde can't resist that mischievous smile and looks at Zeus with a raised eyebrow, "Really? I don't think they're really playing any games with each other and even if they were, Loki wouldn't be the one I was worried about."

The day of your fight came, everyone felt bad for you because the Gods had pitted you against their wisest diety. The humans weeped, after all, you were such a delightful soul but you stood know chance against such a revered and knowledgeable God. Göll was horrified as she started to tear up, you had become something like a big sister too her in your time here. Always comforting her after she lost her sisters and reassuring her that their sacrifices won't be in vain.

"I-I...We can't lose her too, Brunhilde!" Göll weeded. Bruhilde looked at you as you entered the ring, the both of you sharing a crimson smile.

"We won't, Göll." She assured.

While Heimdall was doing introductions, Loki was floating upside down and kicking his feet excitedly when you walked out. It wasn't uncommon for him to switch sides but for the first time since Ragnarok started, he was rooting for the humans.

"You seem quite happy. Aren't you worried about her?" Hermes noted. Loki turned his head towards him slightly: "Hmm? No. Not really. Why?"

Shiva speaks up, "Hey, I like that little mortal as much as the next God but she's...kinda out of her league this round, isn't she? I mean...look at who they're going against."

The round starts and your battlefield takes place in a clock tower where gears grinded and other mechanics clanked and clacked loudly. Your opponent looks at you smugly as you play with your divine weapon, a bouncing ball.

"I know, I feel bad for the poor God." Loki snickered, "After all, she's is quite clever when she wants to be~"

The very first thing you do, much to everyone's surprise, is throw your ball into one of the gears. The God against you taunts you for creating such a dumb mistake and you just smile at them, shrugging your shoulders carelessly.

"I can't watch this." Shiva groans, looking away. The green haired God smiled: "Aw, but you're gonna miss the good part!"

As they charge at you, you seem completely unbothered, standing still in one place. As they went to attack you, something sounds like it breaks and one of the giant gears hits the God into the side of the arena. Sending them crashing into the other gears, they try to shake it off and go after you again but realizes that one of their garments is caught in the gears, causing them to stay stuck.

Everyone watches from the screen and the God's can sense something is about to happen.

"What on Earth is going on?" Aphrodite frowned, confused as to why you haven't done ANYTHING to attack. Thor looks at Loki and narrows his eyes: "What did you mean by she was clever earlier?"

"Exactly what I said. Wisdom is fun and all if you're boring, you can know everything all you want. But cleverness is all about using the area and everything around you. Sometimes even the people." Loki smirked as he looked at the other Gods.

During your fight, the God still hasn't been able to get loose and your ball that was stopping the two gears from moving couldn't handle the pressure of being squeezed into two different directions before it finally shot out of the gears and directly at the God. With such force that their body which was struggling to be untangled now went limp and everyone gasped, the ball now having created a clean hole through the God's chest. You tilted your head as you looked at the camera, directly towards Brunhilde.

"Was that really it? I've had checkers matches that lasted longer."

The gods are horrified, unable to comprehend how their colleague could have been beaten so easily by a human like you. Meanwhile when humanity recovered from the shock, they cheered with such ferocity and excitement as you walked out of the stadium, your valkyrie appearing beside you and suffering from a killer headache and you apologized sweetly but congratulated her for being such an awesome partner.

"W-What just happened!?" Ares demanded, turning around to glare at the God of Mischief, "DID YOU HELP HER!?"

"Hmm? Oh, nah. She did it all by herself, can you believe that?" Loki grinned. Zeus grabbed him by his shoulder warningly: "Loki...if I found out you betrayed us for a mortal-"

Loki looked shocked but then laughed, his hand covering his mouth and tears nearly forming at the corners of his eyes.

"Please, don't tell me you didn't notice anything off about (Y/n)? Even I knew it but I thought you'd all see it. Although, I can't blame you, she nearly had me fooled." He sang in a know it all manner, "That's why I went to talk to her after Adam's match, after all, she was so chipper...a bit too happy. You know what she told me that day when I asked her why?"

The Gods all stayed silent, Loki kept them in suspense before quoting those exact words you told him: "that she couldn't wait to see the look on your faces when she avenged her friends."

They looked at him and then at you, who was now waving at the cameras and even blew a kiss at where Loki was.

"She...She was acting the whole time?" Hermes frowned.

"You knew?" Odin finally spoke up, rising to his full height and standing in front of Loki. Loki only lowered himself onto his chair and brought his knees to his chest, "I wasn't sure. After all, she complimented my boots right after so I assumed it was her optimism but I had my suspicions. I didn't know for sure until this battle. It's terrifying, isn't it? How she played us into just giving her a win on a silver platter."

Loki then bit his nail with a smile, a blush on his face growing as the Gods were realizing how you'd play them for fools the entire time.

"She's so perfect.♡"

#record of ragnarok x reader #record of ragnarok #ror x reader #shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader #snv x reader #ror loki #ror loki x reader #snv loki #Loki x reader ror #loki x reader snv #loki x reader record of ragnarok

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angie-words · 14 days ago

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I sometimes forget there are genuinely people out there who believe God is literally intervening in their life

Storytime: I ended up giving some hitch-hiking Romanian pilgrims a lift on New Year's Day because that's just my life I guess

CW for religious condescension and internalised misogyny

I was driving to see my sister and she lives 5 minutes away by car. Literally a minute into the drive from our house, me and my partner see two women standing at the side of the road trying to wave people down

I pull over and my partner winds down the window to check if everything is OK. Turns out they're trying to get to a nearby monastery but it's New Year's Day: there aren't any buses running and there's no local train station even remotely close to it

I ask if they've tried calling a taxi and they say they were being asked to pay a huge amount of money (I mean, it is NY Day and it sounded reasonable to me, but I'm also British so I'm more than used to paying a stupid amount of money for transport and that being the norm)

Ubers weren't turning up and she said we were the first people to stop. I did point out it's before noon on New Year's Day and it's frankly amazing anyone else was about (I know this was a bit passive aggressive in hindsight, but I am English so what can you do)

I looked at my partner and said "look, it's 15 minutes away, not too far out the way, they're not going to get there without us" and he agreed we should help

They get in and this is when I find out they have travelled all the way from Romania to the UK, just to visit this monastery and attend a service

As we drove, one of the women starts telling us all about her faith and tries to ask about mine (which I dodge). We're just politely asking questions, as you do when faced with someone who's extremely enthusiastic about their religion and now in the back of your car for 15 minutes

Anyway, at some point, she says she's so glad that she prayed to the Virgin Mary and that she sent us to rescue them, insisting we must have God in our heart. I really wanted to say "oh boy, I cannot begin to tell you how much your girl Mary did not reach out to me!" but I just thought, this woman is going to be out of my car and my life in a few minutes and nothing I say will convince her otherwise: just nod

My partner, unable to read my mind or contain his own thoughts, says "Well, ah, I'm actually an atheist sooo 😅"

My expression at that moment, realising he has opened up a can of worms:

Of course, this did not deter her. She then proceeded to laugh and say "Oh I love atheists because they aren't really! They have God in their heart!"

She said my partner can't be an atheist because he is a good person because he stopped whereas no one else did and I thought: OK, I was the one who stopped, not him soooo

There was absolutely no way to argue against it because it was all "you did good thing! Anyone who does good has God in their heart! Therefore you must believe in God!" 🙃

I did say "I mean, you don't have to believe in God to be a good person", which she kind of ignored

So far, so predictable. She believed that because she prayed to the Virgin Mary, that's why I turned up like some kind of Holy Uber service. However, then she started talking about saints, including one who argued for women's right for education

Me: oh well that sounds lovely!

Her: yes, and she didn't argue like some modern women, all aggressive... She did it in a feminine way!

Me, wearing piercings and tattoos and looking decidedly not the kind of feminine trad religious women mean, while wearing my black hoodie that says "Future Ghost": 🙄

Aaaanyway we got them to the monastery and they were very polite and said thank you and then tried to get us to come inside even though we have been super clear at this point that we were on my way to see my sister's family

They offered us money and I said not to worry, it wasn't that far after all. They then asked for our names and said they were going to pray for us and that God loved us and I wanted to say "no no, that's OK!" but hey, whatever makes them happy

One of the things that made me laugh about the whole situation was when she said "oh, but you're clearly good people because no one else stopped! I think those other people were just good only in their manners, not their heart!" and I answered "I mean, that's basically most English people, tbf"

I later told my sister all about it, who said "I'm sorry, that was a nice thing you did, but that's so fucking funny", and "lucky it was you who picked them up and not some dangerous weirdos"

Just picked up by some regular kind weirdos instead, I guess

#personal #cw religion #cw internalized misogyny

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hyuniyz · 3 years ago

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SKZ WHEN THEY'RE JEALOUS

contains. fluff? whiny members

warnings. none

requested? yes.

masterlist

◟▪chan [ 방찬 ]

he doesn't notice for so long please. he keeps replying to the other person enthusiastically until he notices how they aren't really acknowledging him and instead are focused solely on you. he's like hold awn... now chan knows you're attractive there's no doubt in that, but he has to applaud the guts this man has to approach you and downright flirt with you in front of your boyfriend. does the tounge on the inside of the cheek thing lord. he notices when you start getting uncomfortable and pulls you in his side before engaging the person in a conversation. he finds it amusing how they aren't in to the conversation in contrast to a couple minutes ago. they get the hint and leave. proud bf :D "I scared him off baby" "yes because you're very intimidating chan..."

◟▪lee know [ 리노 ]

playing yourself if you hit on his s/o in front of him. has that stupid smirk on his face that just screams "she's just not in to you man" he feels second hand embarrassment when the person keeps trying but you ignore his advances and instead turn over to stand closer to minho. he immediately pulls you into his side and raises his eyebrows when the person turns to look at him - finally acknowledging him - "is there a problem?" "no... no problem." the moment they're gone.. 😭 my man starts talking shit. "I can't decide if that was satire or not." "how embarrassing for him." "does he know you have a really handsome boyfriend that cooks for you and loves you a lot?? how can he even think of competing against that psh."

◟▪changbin [ 창빈 ]

not amused. he's more embarrassed for the other person then mad because it's painfully obvious how you're trying to end the conversation but that man does not get the hint. he's stifling his giggles in your neck with his arms circled around your waist. it doesn't take him long to pull you both away from the brainless man, especially when changbin sees how his retorts are making you uncomfortable. would throw hands if that man invaded your personal space but you both don't stay long enough for that. he pulls you out of the café you were originally planning to hang out at and instead drags you over to the little ice-cream shop across the street. "I need an ice-cream after that" talks shit about him in pout <3

◟▪hyunjin [ 현진 ]

this dramatic idiot 😭 when he sees another man approach you and engage you in a conversation from across the room he's there in an instant. doesn't even wait to see what the man was going to say. when he's right beside you he doesn't waste a second in loudly announcing. "hi my pretty and very unavailable girlfriend" the smile on his face when he turns to look at the other person is stretching far too much and you fail in containing your laughter when a giggle escapes. even the other person is like 🧍"right so I'm gonna" they jolt their thumb over their shoulder before quickly retreating. you're left hysterically laughing over their expression but your boyfriend isn't amused. "jagiya" he stomps his feet like a child who was denied his favourite candy. "why didn't you tell him about your very handsome and pretty boyfriend when he was right across the room hmph." then a look scepticism comes across his face and he leans close enough to stare closely in your eyes "do you even love me anymore huh???" "baby he was literally asking me the directions..." "oh... I knew that pshh" you're grinning and when he sees the smile on your face he's immediately defending himself. "I wasn't jealous.." "I never said you were"

◟▪han [ 한 ]

so passive aggressive. whenever the other person makes a joke in attempt to impress you han laughs loudly even if it's hollow and makes continuous comments "wow you're a real comedian huh." He doesn't bother to hide the fact that he's annoyed. glares daggers at the person whenever they move to stand closer to you. if looks could kill the person in front of you would be put 6 ft under by your boyfriend. he doesn't really understand why you're both still there. maybe because he knows you're too nice for your own good and would probably be mad at him for being rude and walking away or maybe he's just waiting for the person to actually cross the line so he can give him a piece of his mind. luckily you bid the person farewell before pulling han away. he glares at them until he's forced to turn the corner and then he turns towards you. so soft now in contrast to a few minutes ago. he's nuzzling into your hair and whining. "the audacity ⁉️ can you believe him." stomps all the way home until you've promised him kisses and cuddles for the rest of the night.

◟▪felix [ 필릭스 ]

he's so confused. can't decide if the person is being serious or not. because the way you're sitting in his lap is a clear indication that you're unavailable. he even goes as far as pulling you in by the waist but the brainless man in front of you still continues with his advances. now I know that this man is our infamous sunshine but when he's mad he's mad. especially when he can tell you're actually getting uncomfortable. he stands up and pulls you both away before the man can utter a single word. he didn't really want to get caught up in an argument but he knew that if you guys stayed there long enough he would definitely do more then argue. pulls you into his chest when you're far enough. clings to you the rest of the day. "Hmm no you need to have my scent all over you so they can back off." he's not shameful in admitting he's jealous but you dismiss his worries and reassure him that he's truly your number 1 <33 smiles so hard when you go on about the things you love him for. forgets about everything else

◟▪seungmin [ 승민 ]

he's not one to get jealous easily. but when he does it results in him being clingy and super affectionate even though he's not really big on PDA but anything to get the message across. now he trusts you but right now he doesn't trust the man in front of you. brings out the glares when they still don't budge. i would cry if this man looked at me like that #?!)? £? you're amused at his expressions but you also know how he's not really comfortable with this so you drag him away. rapping session when you're far enough ☝️‼️ says all the shit that comes to mind you're surprised at how much he was keeping in. when you bring up the prospect of him being jealous... he denies at soon as you voice that thought out loud. "me jealous? please I just didn't want him to embarrass himself." right of course whatever floats your boat minnie.

◟▪jeongin [ 아이엔 ]

literally this emoji 🧍 he's fidgeting the whole time :(( he doesn't want to pull you away because that would be rude but he's also getting uncomfortable as the time goes on and the man continues to hit on you. he's tugging on your sleeves subconsciously and when you turn to look at him you register just how uncomfortable he is even though he tries to hide it. you politely pull away from the person and instead take jeongin to an empty hallway. and when you're both completely alone he breaks. rants about how disrespectful that was and how he would have "thrown hands" if that man continued with his antics but you know he never really would because he's simply too shy. you cut him off mid sentence by placing your lips on his and intertwining your fingers together. he's whining in the kiss but soon reciprocates. even when you pull away he's still upset so coffee date to cheer him up :D

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cinnamonest · 3 years ago

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Speaking of though. I've brought this up before but boys getting all hurty and bitter because darling has been talking positively about other people is so cute yet so obnoxious because I swear none of these bastards can healthily process and express their feelings like. I have thoughts on a few

Kaeya is soooo passive aggressive. Just mumbling things under his breath. He gets super petulant about it even, it's kinda uncharacteristic of him really, but when he gets bitter enough he can be really childish about expressing it. Stays just close enough for you to see him but pulls super petty shit like standing up and walking out of a room as soon as you come in. It's super quiet and that's how you know something's up since he normally can't shut up. Like he wants you to bring it up, he's not gonna initiate the conversation, because he wants the reassurance that you care about him being upset and if he doesn't get that he gets progressively more subtly passive aggressive until you bring it up and then finally the dam breaks and puts on the arrogant narcissist demeanor, lectures you about how your behaviors and actions recently have been inconsiderate and selfish and he's so gracious to put up with it. Turns everything back into being your fault. Folds his arms and kinda shifts his weight onto one foot, irritated stance, talks over you. Can be placated and somewhat soothed with enthusiastically initiating apology sex, but he stays mad a while, rolls over away from you in hopes you'll go back to apologizing again. He just really likes hearing you apologize. He's a sensitive, hurty boi but too insecure to be honest with you, and needs the ego boost.

Childe's similar but more direct and less gaslight-y. Also passive aggressive and quiet but less in a pouty way and more in a smiley way. Smiles really big all the time, very obviously forced. He's a bit talkative. "So how was your day?" But it's immediately obvious he's pissed off just from his tone, a fake sweetness that clearly says you need to apologize for something. Also can be placated with sex. But thankfully he's more likely to actually stop being mad afterwards. If it was genuinely anger, he's more likely to just get over it and return to his normal self, but if the pouting was triggered by having his feelings hurt he's more likely to get a bit vulnerable/open with you and grumble a confession that you more or less hurt his feelings, resting his face against your shoulders or chest, in hopes you'll reassure him.

Xiao. Supreme pouty. You take a bit longer to realize something's wrong because he's normally quiet anyway, but the biggest indicator is the space between you. He's normally trying to get awkwardly touchy, even though flustered about it, he just loves touch too much, likes to just be in your presence and watch you, but now he's in another room. Putting space between you. Sitting cross legged on the floor in a corner, arms crossed, just very very very ">:(" and turns his head the other way when you try to look at him. Embodies "no talk me I angy." Slow to admit he's mad even if you bring it up, keeps saying "nothing" and going quiet again. He might admit to being mad but just not tell you why. In the end he can hold the anger for a few days even before it just settles into being hurt and he comes crawling back to you, still not vocalizing his feelings, but being all touchy and pulling you into his lap and hugging and hoping you'll hug back to make him feel reassured. He's the least likely to actually admit why he's upset in the end, but as long as darling gives him kisses and cuddles and sweet words and all those other things he needs, he can be reassured with just that.

Xingqiu is kinda similar to Kaeya/Childe but even more obvious. Says passive aggressive stuff out loud rather than mumbling it. He still wants you to be the one to acknowledge it, but will blatantly push you to do so, he's impatient and less mature. He also won't tell you what it is, not because he's embarrassed, but because he wants you to figure out what you did wrong, since you *should* know, he thinks. Will also follow you around, stays pouty a long time. Difficult to placate, you have to more or less wait for him to get over it on his own, but apologies and affection will speed up the process. He might finally admit to being hurt, but will be very snobby and grumpy about it, not wanting to appear vulnerable.

At least you can finally get transparency out of Razor though. It's such a breath of fresh air from the others. Will literally just be like "I'm angry because of this >:(" and pout right in front of you. On the downside he's actually not quick to forgive. You can apologize but he'll keep pouting and being mad the rest of the day, it's certainly the most childish out of all because he just follows natural instinct as a child would do, which is to express anger by being mad and huffy in front of you to try to invoke more apologies. And if you move and walk somewhere else, he's close behind you, won't let you be alone because he's mad and you need to know he's mad so you have to keep seeing him mad >:( however, also very childishly, one quick way to get him back to normal and even snap from angry to happy is just offering him anything to make him happy. You wanna go for a walk?? Eat some food? Play a game? He just !!! And forgets he was ever mad. Or being overly apologetic, telling him you're sorry, you feel bad, he'll forgive you right...? He's easily manipulable so at that he would start to feel bad himself and forgive you.

Diluc is the biggest candidate for getting outwardly and openly angry. He's got some anger management problems going on, so he can't really control himself well enough to be too passive aggressive, he's just... Aggressive. Gets all snarly and eyes narrowed and openly says petulantly bitter things. Gets physical from the get go, grabbing you and dragging you around when you get frustrated and roll your eyes at him, just drags you to bed for whatever he has planned to get his anger out. Grabs you hard even if you're just pacing around the same room and asks you where the fuck you think you're going, he didn't say you could just walk out. However, because he's so openly angry, the thing is that it's actually kinda good because he gets out the anger all at once without letting it build and build, and so the anger peaks and dies down pretty quickly, and then he's just... Hurt. Folds his arms and looks sadly at the ground, lower lip pouting, very sad puppy eyes. He wants you to feel bad and dote on him and tell him it's ok and you're sorry and you still love him :( ...even though he might have just spent the past few minutes being mean and hurting you... That's not important, what's important is he's sad so you need to comfort him :( if you show him some affection he'll finally kinda just lean into the embrace and bury his head in your shoulder/chest and quietly say forget it, it's dumb, but if you push it he'll admit what he was mad about, just in that same quiet voice.

Albedo is one of the hardest to recognize. You won't know he's mad. It doesn't really show on his face. It doesn't show in his tone of voice or word choice. It's the little actions you finally notice. His walking is heavy, almost stomping. When he finishes with the equipment he was working on, he doesn't set it down gently, he harshly shoves it down or kinda drops it with a loud thud that makes you jump. He nearly slams doors. You can see his hand curled into a fist by his side, or his jaw clenching. If you don't bring it up soon, he starts getting a little passive aggressive, mostly cold shoulder, talks even less than normal. If you bring it up though, he acts like he has no idea what you're talking about. He's not mad. Why would you think that? You have to really push before he finally admits it, and when he does it's one of those rare moments of a break in his usual personality, he snaps and bitterly spits out an answer, speaking through clenched teeth, but more or less is transparent about why. After the outburst he just kinda sighs and says to forget it, nevermind, forget that happened... Secretly is kinda like Diluc, really hoping you'll come over and be all apologetic and tell him you're sorry for what you did wrong, you won't do it again, give him hugs and kisses please, just cling to him... And begging for forgiveness would be nice too. Gets kinda surprised Pikachu face if you actually do try to forget it and move on. Whoops.

Scara though. Almost comical. He's so so so so obviously bitter. His face twists up at half the things you say and he just kinda tch'es and crosses his arms. Openly passive aggressive, openly upset, but if you do what you're supposed to and apologize for what you did, or if you're too stupid to figure it out and have to ask what you did wrong... Well either way, he just flat out refuses. Realistically, it's because he's likely mad over something embarrassingly trivial and small, but can't help but be mad. But he just. Won't. Let it go. It's a weird duality where he refuses to tell you, rolling his eyes and trying to make it sound like it should be obvious, and if you're too dumb then you don't deserve to be told, but also won't get over it. Like Razor he just kinda follows you around because you need to know he's mad dammit. You need to feel bad and recognize that he's perfectly justified in being mad and you should be apologizing. If you start getting an attitude instead of being apologetic he just gets angrier and that's never good. If you finally do figure it out and say sorry he just kinda sighs and asks why it took you so long, clearly you're not sorry at all. Needs you to really grovel and beg for forgiveness before he'll actually let it go. Really snobbish and narcissistic about the whole thing, constantly making you feel stupid for not apologizing immediately.

#scheduled post

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foulserpent · 4 years ago

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very curious to see how you'd approach fixing the bard's college questline!

heres just off the top of my head. im thinking it has a somewhat comedic (but not outright 100% silly) tone and be really focused on the role of story and song as a chronicle of history.

the dragonborn joins the college, only to find theyre mostly there to be hired muscle and to help train a more promising bard apprentice by being a muse for their songs- you do the college’s busywork, and they try to write inspiring music about it.

the apprentice bard is deeply enamored with skyrim’s bardic history and the roles of bards in battle and politics. and they dont like you very much and make scathing passive aggressive songs about you, just bc that would be funny. depending on your choices they might eventually grow more friendly with you but should never give you the hero treatment.

the fetch quests for instruments can still be there, but the intent is to play up the humor of the situation (youre hired muscle and this bard who thinks you suck is writing scathing songs about your performance) and diversify the situations a bit

finn’s lute: the lute was stolen by some bandits, one of whom is making bank going from town to town with it as a bard. theyre a charming thief and have a way with words, and no ones gonna side with you over him. he’s very weak and not much of a fight, but hangs out in busy taverns and it will be VERY hard to kil or steal from him and get away with it. you have options as to how to deal with this, including murder, theft, doing him a “favor” (stealing something else for him of greater value as a trade or maybe resolving a conflict with the other bandits), etc. none of the options are particularly glorious and your partner writes a song about the mighty hero begrudgingly making shady deals with a twinkish thief in a tavern.

panteas flute: a necromancer stole a flute, and now theres whispers of strange music and sounds of revelry in the marshes at night... this is bc the necromancer HAS actually enchanted it to ‘make the dead dance’. you find them in a grove, at the remains of what looks to be some wild bacchic revelry where all the people are dead except for the necromancer. they play the flute, which reanimates the corpses in waves, with some of them attacking you and some just dancing. your partner watches from a safe vantage point and commentates on your performance.

rjorn’s drum: i dont really remember doing this one ingame. basic summary is ‘find lost drum of a 2nd era battle drummer (who turns out to have been lured to his death in this cairn by a powerful draugr lord) which i think could be interesting.. i guess it would be cool if it could bring the historical element into it more , like we learn about what a battle drummer was. might be corny but it also might be fun if during the boss battle, the ghost of rjorn manifests and plays a warsong that gives you advantage in the battle. your partner joins in

the “tending the flames” quest comes AFTERWORDS and is the grand culmination of events. id want it to be very much steeped in history and kind of exploring the role of the bard in nordic culture. we NEED to be able to read more of the poetic edda since its like, the bardic history of skyrim.

i think it would be interesting if the ghost of the bard svaknir (who accompanies you) uses the Voice in song form, which im not sure if thats technically just a headcanon or not but it would be really interesting. he definitely should be singing AND fighting (instead of just fighting and yelling) but you cant actually talk to him or get him to tell you the verses.

once you recover the verse, viarmo is like “god damnit this is barely intact. UGH. come see me later” as-is ingame and the quest is on hold. and this bit might be stupid but here me out:

at this point, you can wait a few days and get a summons to return to the college and complete the quest as normal. but youll hear rumors like “theyre saying that something happened at dragonsreach.. that big dragon skull is gone!!” it adds a miscellaneous quest.

you go investigate, and theres a big fucking hole in the walls where numinex’s skull used to be. a guard was like “damndest thing. it just went FLYING!”, its implied that this was numinex being resurrected by alduin.

your partner, a devoted bard very interested in the college’s history, is like “HOLY SHIT LETS GO FIND NUMINEX TO HEAR THE STORY STRAIGHT FROM HIM!!!” theyre really enthusiastic about this as a way to both learn this mysterious segment of history and as a more dignified way to save the verses than “making shit up”. you can choose to accept this or to go “no way lol” and just complete the quest as normal by making up new verses. (choosing to visit numinex will gain your partners approval, choosing not to will make them think youre lame)

if you accept, your partner is like “hmmm well all the stories say numinex roosted on mount anthor. lets check there”. you go there, he’s there, but not quite himself. he’ll be willing to talk with you, though very rude. he doesnt care that much about the silly little human festival, but he’s really quite lonely, lamenting about his imprisonment and eager to tarnish the reputation of the foul nord that captured him. one way or the other, you can get his side of the story in order to truly restore the poetic edda. you can go through this without him becoming hostile, and afterwords he can be found here or at the throat of the world, chatting with paarthurnax

either way, the ending is similar- you can tell the story as numinex told it, or you can make shit up like you do ingame. the festival is a success, and the bards college starts treating you like an actual bard. you can now actually play instruments, and earn money in little sidequests to perform at inns and at events and stuff, help write songs, etc.

maybe as a final little thing.. your partner asks you to accompany them to bard’s leap. if you do that, and you jump alongside them, theyll finally respect you . (just a bit) and they can be a permanent companion

#anon

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feralaot · 4 years ago

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AOT characters + an FTM!reader s/o

I had a few requests asking for different characters with an FTM reader so this is just a compilation combining all of those!

warnings: brief mention of dysphoria, brief mention of transphobia

modern setting

Armin

oh lord he’s so sweet. he almost cries when you come out to him because he’s just so honored and happy that you trusted him enough to tell him something like that

after coming out he immediately drops your dead name and uses your preferred pronouns on the spot. he cares a lot and wants you to know that he supports you endlessly

if somebody says something rude to you armin will try to passive aggressively educate them because that’s his boyfriend they’re disrespecting 🤬

if you’re post op and are comfortable with being shirtless around him, armin might offer to paint on your chest and scars. it’s a huge part of his love language and he wants to show you that your body is beautiful no matter what it’s been through. flowers, landscapes, constellations... anything that he thinks is beautiful

with that being said his favorite flowers are cornflowers so expect a lot of those being painted on your skin

Jean

don’t even worry about anyone purposely misgendering you or saying something disrespectful, jean will literally beat them up no hesitation

he’s not very good at comforting someone but he sure does try. awkward pats on the backs calling you handsome and reaffirming your gender identity will probably be the method

he’s definitely a himbo and doesn’t understand it completely so you can expect to get a lot of questions from him about your identity but he won’t push any boundaries or ask uncomfortable things

he does however try his best to research on his own and educate himself to learn what to do to best suit your needs and be as respectful as possible :)

really doesn’t care how masculine you look or how well you pass, no matter what he’s gonna claim that he’s “the worse looking one” in the relationship and he’s totally okay with that

Levi

seems like the kind of person to not give a shit what your gender is. if he likes you and you like him, why should it matter? he doesn’t mind at all is what I’m basically saying

however don’t let that fool you. he’s very gentle and never pushes your boundaries. he’s also going to throw major hands with anyone who’s being transphobic 🙄

while he does seem to give off the attitude that he doesn’t care about anything he does care immensely about you and your mental health. he’s open 24/7 if you ever want to vent to him, he’ll listen with no complaints and be very thoughtful.

he’s surprisingly accommodating for you. obviously being levi’s anything is a difficult task since he’s so closed off to people in general but if he really trusts you then you’ve definitely earned it and you two are inseparable

his love language is using lots of positive affirmations and validating words like “handsome”

Hange

we already know that hange is going to be over enthusiastic about you and your transition, especially if you decide to medically transition. they’re gonna want to know everything about it and always tag along to your bloodwork tests

they’re also hands down the best shopping buddy, they’ll always offer to take you to whatever store you want and buy you whatever clothes you want

if somebody were to say something rude about you or them hange wouldn’t even bother trying to explain they’d just go straight to yelling profanities because “you can’t help stupid” 🙄

if / when you get top surgery they’ll be babying you through the entire recovery process; making sure you took your meds, making sure you have enough blankets, making sure you’re never hungry or thirsty. it’s adorable but can get just a little obnoxious after a bit LMAO

if you aren’t publicly out and don’t want other people to know quite yet, rest assured that it’s completely safe with hange. they may be a loudmouth but they know that this is a level of trust that can never be betrayed. they refer to it as “confidential”

Reiner

we have another himbo here that doesn’t know much about it but he sure does try his best to learn everything he should know so that he doesn’t accidentally say something insensitive

eventually he becomes well versed in vocabulary and quickly realizes that, yes, he is in fact gay for being attracted to you

he asks a lot of questions but stammers and stutters and apologizes as he expresses them. a lot of his questions are asking for clarification on things or specifics for how he can best accommodate your preferences. what’s okay to say in public? how do you prefer to be addressed? he sweats bullets honestly

he’s the most willing to go to pride events because we already know he’s a flaming homosexual and is willing to be loud about it, you’re his boyfriend and he’s gonna be proud of it

he’s gonna validate you with small mocking compliments like “ugh, stop being so damn handsome, I can’t even look at you!”

Bertholdt

when you came out to him he could tell that you were visibly nervous, so he immediately pointed out that it’s absurd to think he would be uncomfortable with it. he’s supportive all the way with whatever you decide to do and will be there for guidance if you ever need it.

he always offers you his clothes because naturally they’re probably very baggy compared to your normal size so a lot of your closet is just sweaters that you’re borrowing from him but he doesn’t mind because he thinks you look adorable in them 💗

I think he’s sort of touchy but it’s not something you see from him much in public, only in private. every day he would ask what you’re okay with, especially if you’re particularly dysphoric. he also checks in through the day to see if anything has changed

if you’re post op and comfortable with being shirtless he would like to gently trace your scars and tell you affirming things about how your body is beautiful, your scars don’t define you if you don’t want them to, etc

he’s very gentle and considerate and will never press you for details that you aren’t comfortable sharing or push any boundaries whatsoever

Annie

she acts like she doesn’t care very much but in fact she’s very grateful that you had enough trust in her for you to feel safe coming out to her. she doesn’t think a lot of people trust her but once you told her this fact she felt.... appreciated

she already knows a bit about gender stuff (porco is a trans guy too, so she had to deal with him when he was going through his transition as well) so you can take it easy and not have to worry about explaining things to her very often

she always reminds you to take your hormones or any medication you need, she’s very thoughtful and probably remembers your schedule better than you do LMAO you better take care of yourself or she’s coming for you

she says a lot of things like “handsome” and “my boyfriend” completely on purpose because that little flush on your face you get when she does is always worth seeing

if you’re okay with it, she’s very physically affectionate and will gently touch your chest or kiss your scars, just making sure that you know you’re appreciated in her eyes no matter what anyone else thinks about you.

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i-want-candy · 2 years ago

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Space Camp [Part Four: What’s the Problem? I Don’t Know.] ! [Canvan]

In which Candace and Vanessa fight...over dishes?...[takes place July 20]

@vanecessary-conditions

[tw -- none]

CANDACE: “VANESSA!” Candace barked from the kitchen where she was standing with her arms crossed.

Things had been weird since the party a few days ago. She didn’t really see Vanessa much. They existed around each other, but not with each other. It had been a while since she had really talked to Vanessa, she was pretty sure she was avoiding her. (Candace was avoiding her too.)

This was too much, though. It was like Vanessa was punishing her. For what? Kissing her?? Vanessa had been pretty enthusiastic about it too!! This wasn’t just her crime to repent for. The pressure had been building and building and now Candace wanted to explode.

When the other girl finally appeared around the corner, Candace crossed her arms and jut her hip out. “These dishes have been in the sink for two days!”

VANESSA: Vanessa was trying to nap, but someone had other ideas. She pressed both hands to her ears, hoping that Candace would lose her stamina. But the yelling continued, and finally Vanessa groaned, threw both legs off her bed, and marched outside her bedroom.

She did not want to be having whatever conversation this was right now. Or ever, really. She wished she had the sort of roommate who left passive aggressive texts and sticky notes (but then again, that sounded equally as terrible, and Vanessa sort of preferred that Candace tell her everything to her face, if only because she was that sort of person as well).

“I got home past midnight yesterday!” she shouted. “Forgive me for not jumping to do the dishes the minute I got home. And now I have a bad headache and I just wanna take a goddamn nap, but noooo, apparently —” Vanessa caught sight of just what dishes were in the sink and let out a bark of laughter. “Oh my God, Candace, it’s two bowls — are you really getting on my ass about two bowls?”

CANDACE: “Yeah! I am,” Candace huffed. “If you haven’t noticed, we only have two!”

It was weird. They’d gone almost this whole time without fighting. She was actually kind of enjoying living with Vanessa. They didn’t see each other much during the day, so it was nice to come back and kind of commiserate on the day. Plus, for the group intern stuff, she always had a buddy. Which made her a lot less anxious, because she didn’t think the other interns liked her very much and she didn’t know what she’d do with herself if all their field trips and special lectures…she spent alone.

But--

That was why this was so annoying now! Vanessa was ruining a good thing! She should have just known this was going to happen.

“What were you doing out at midnight anyway? We have work tomorrow!”

VANESSA: She’d already started the sink. Fine. She’d do the stupid dishes, even though Candace could totally just cut her some damn slack and do the dishes for her. She’d run the water scalding hot and scrub them so clean that Candace could see her pretty face in the bottom of it. Whatever. She could handle Candace getting upset about the dishes.

What really annoyed her, though, was when Candace started nagging her about her schedule.

“It was a work thing!” snapped Vanessa. “I mean, kinda. Jess and I had an idea to maybe try infusing some magic into our intern project. Not the main one, but, like, a supplement.”

It had been going terribly, hence why Vanessa had been out so late. The regular intern project was well on track and going swimmingly, but Vanessa wanted more — she was finally good at something and she wanted to prove that she could be good at both magic and science. Jess was game for this experiment and so after work, they’d been finangling some spare bits and pieces to enchant a drone of their own.

She didn’t want to talk about how it was going.

“Why do you even care about my schedule?” Vanessa angrily scrubbed the bowl. “Not even my dad cared this much in high school.”

CANDACE: Candace felt another burst of jealousy.

“Excuse me for caring! This is a big deal, we can’t screw it up.”

Was she talking about Vanessa or herself? That was an easy question to answer, because Candace felt like she was screwing it up at every turn. Like no one liked her. Like no one thought she was smart or deserved to be here, because she wasn’t and she didn’t. Vanessa was smart. Vanessa had been doing this her whole life. Vanessa’s dad was a freaking scientist. Did she hate Candace too? Did she think Candace was a fraud or a fluke or the girl who just ran the social media?

“Whatever.” She tossed the dish towel she’d been holding onto the counter next to Vanessa. “Don’t let me get in the way of yours and Jess’ little date.”

VANESSA: “What the fuck are you talking about?” Vanessa felt the anger curl in her chest. She didn’t know why Candace was being so weird about this. “We were just doing a little experiment — playing with the scientific method or whatever. It’s not gonna fuck anything up and also, Jess has a girlfriend.”

Also, Jess wasn’t Vanessa’s type. She had short, buzzed hair and tattoos, which Vanessa thought were objectively cool, but she liked girls with long hair, hair that she could run her fingers through, hair that was a pretty, vibrant color —

She stopped herself before that thought careened off the metaphorical railway tracks in her head.

“God! Why are you being so weird about two bowls? It’s not the end of the world!”

CANDACE: “I am not being weird.”

Maybe she was. Her arms crossed over her chest and she dug her fingers into her biceps. She wasn’t being weird but she definitely was. Because she was jealous. She was jealous that Vanessa was so good at all of this. That people liked her. That she was smart. That she was hanging out with hot girls who were also smart and that people liked. Meanwhile, Candace was alone and she--depended on Vanessa’s company. She missed her when she was gone late. She wanted to know what she was doing. She wanted to be invited.

“Whatever,” Candace said. “Just--clean your dishes. It is so annoying to not have any clean bowls.” She stalked off again, needing to go…cool off. Also, she didn’t want to try to explain herself any more than she already had. It might lead her to something that she would regret saying. (Like how she was jealous or how she missed her…)

She waited in her room until she heard Vanessa’s door close and she could slip back out to make her breakfast.

#swynvanessa #canvan #space camp arc #nasa arc #what's the problem? i don't know

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matthewtkachuk · 4 years ago

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how to be a heartbreaker: rule one - rafe cameron

Rafe Cameron’s privileged upbringing has let him get away with far too much, for far too long. Between his tormenting of the pogues, running his mouth without consequence, and arrogant attitude, it’s time someone knocked him down a peg. Breaking his bones didn’t work, but maybe you can break his heart.

co-authored with my love, freya @rekrappeter

pairing: Rafe Cameron x reader, unrequited!JJ x reader

warnings: angst, starting a relationship under false pretences, drinking and drug use

word count: 2k

a/n: here’s rule one, let us now what you think!! we’re having the time of our lives writing this and we hope it brings you just as much joy :)

series masterlist

“This is a bad, bad idea,” Pope was the first one to comment, eyes staring wide at his blonde friend standing in the corner of the room. JJ stood there, a large cunning grin spread across his face; he stood tall beside a chalkboard with a wooden ruler slapping on the palm of his hand. On the board, written in his chicken scratch writing, were the rules associated with what he calls ‘the most brilliant plan in the world’.

“I have so many questions,” Kiara muttered, “firstly, where did you get that chalkboard, JJ?” she asked confused about the origin of the wheeled chalkboard taking up half the space in the chateau’s living room.

“Unimportant,” JJ snapped back, attention focused on you solely as you stared at the rules in confusion.

“JJ, what is all this?” you questioned, brows furrowed and nibbling hard on your bottom lip as you tried to concentrate on deciphering his writing despite JJ giving you and the pogues an hour presentation. “Can you go through this again?”

“How long did it take you to make them rhyme?” Pope asked, chuckling at the frustrated glare JJ shot at him. Pope gave you a knowing look, you both knew that JJ was probably up all night coming up with these and it looked like he had help from a certain Marina.

JJ heaved a loud sigh, his head falling forward. “Okay, I’m going through this once more, then we begin,” the blonde announced, earning a groan from John B who hoisted himself off the couch and to the kitchen, hollering to see if anyone wanted a soda from the fridge. You watched JJ clear his throat, the words jumbling together. Were you ready to commit to this? The thought of having to get close to Rafe Cameron sent unwanted and nervous shivers down your spine, the taste of fear settling in your mouth. You never cared much for Rafe, if it weren’t for your friends, your paths would probably never cross. He’d keep his distance from you, not bothering you if you were alone. But this plan looked as if you would be alone with him, a lot, and something about that wasn’t settling right with you.

“Okay, here we go. Rule number one: make a lasting impression, start the deception.”

You’d never once been nervous at a boneyard party. Not the first one you went to, not the time you overestimated your drinking ability and blacked out and JJ had to carry you back to the chateau, not even when Rafe and his goons had threatened your friends. Tonight, you were nervous. The plan was for you to catch Rafe’s attention just enough to get him interested in you, but you hadn’t left Pope’s side for the past hour, sitting beside him on a large piece of driftwood near the shore.

You felt JJ’s eyes on you, glancing over to see him gesturing with his head toward the group of kooks standing together, passive-aggressively judging and glaring at the pogues while drinking their free beer. “Do it,” he mouths, causing you to groan in frustration.

Pope followed your gaze, eyes locked on your shared best friend’s antics as he asked you, “are you sure you wanna do this?” He turned his attention back to you when he was met with silence. Looking up at him, you weren’t sure of anything.

“I don’t really have a choice, do I?” you pouted, glancing back at JJ to find him preoccupied with some pretty blonde touron. Jealousy brewing in the pit of your stomach, you had to look away.

“You always have a choice, y/n,” Pope stated, but you shake your head.

“Not this time”’ you sighed, eyes unable to keep from looking back to where JJ is now placing his hand on the pretty blonde’s waist. She throws her head back in laughter at something he said and your stomach twists further in on itself.

“Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?” You turn back towards Pope at his tone, his eyes are worried, begging you to back out of this.

You stood from the piece of driftwood, scanning the crowd swiftly before downing your drink at a speed that would impress even JJ. JJ, who made your heart beat irregularly. JJ, who made your thoughts cloud over like an overcast day. JJ, who had his tongue down the throat of some stupid touron. You don’t turn back to Pope as you call over your shoulder, “Let’s just have a little fun.”

Two drinks later and you have your back pressed to some idiot touron’s chest, letting him feel you up, you’re feeling the alcohol course through your veins as your eyes scan the crowd around you. Part of you is looking for JJ, secretly hoping he’s abandoned the blonde from earlier. The other part of you stares at Rafe, taking in his tall stature, his broad shoulders, he’s conventionally attractive you realize, when he’s not tormenting your friends. Shaking off your thoughts, you blame the beer for your disordered thinking, but you can’t help but sneak another peak, this time catching his eyes doing the same to you. The blush takes over your face before you can help it, face feeling hot but you push those feelings away, turning on your game face; you flip your hair over to one side, running your tongue along your teeth, smirking at Rafe. You separate yourself from the touron and head to the keg to grab a refill.

Standing to the side of the party on your own, sipping on your beer, you feel his presence looming over you before you even recognize Rafe Cameron has appeared beside you. “What’s a girl like you doing all alone?”

You bit your lip, resisting the urge to roll your eyes, “A girl like me?”

“The hottest girl on this whole damn island,” he smirked at you. Your brows twitch at his words, eying him suspiciously and you start to wonder is this going to be easier than you thought it’d be. “Let me take you home?”

You can’t control the eye roll this time as you shove him away from you. “Nice, Rafe. Very flattering, but I’m not interested in some quick hookup.”

“I’ll take as long as you want,” he stumbled slightly on the sand, following after your retreating figure.

You scoffed in disgust, looking up to find the pogues but you halt in your step when your eyes find JJ’s blue ones staring at you and the kook he despised. Rafe’s chest crashes against your back when you suddenly stopped, muttering a curse as he grabbed your hips to steady himself.

“Change your mind?” he asked, the smug look washing over his face. Your expression contorted to a look of disdain but as you spun around to face him, you replaced the look with feigned desire. Biting your bottom lip, you gripped his bicep, reveling in the way his eyes flickered towards your mouth.

You leaned your face forward, inching toward his lips before swerving your head to whisper in his ear, “Baby, you’re going to have to try harder than that.” You pushed him away again, this time heading in the direction of your friends, sure to let your hips sway exaggeratedly as you walked away from him. You could feel his lingering stare on your ass. Glancing back at him over your shoulder briefly, you shot him a grin and a wink.

Finally reaching the pogues, you ignored Pope’s concerned glaze, focused on JJ’s enthusiastic attitude. His arm was draped across the blonde girl’s shoulder, he reached out a fist for you to bump it. “That was hot,” he sang. You half-heartedly tapped his fist with your own, stomach sick at the sight of the blonde tucked under his arm. For a brief second, you thought about going after Rafe, tugging on his arm, and pressing your lips to his to see if you could get a rise out of JJ. Thinking better of it, you wrapped an arm around Pope’s waist and leaned into him.

Suddenly sick at the combined thoughts of your deception and your hopeless crush on your best friend, you looked up at Pope hoping he would be able to read the emotions on your face. He nodded subtly at you, before turning to the larger group, “we’re gonna head back to the chateau.”

“What?” JJ protested, tightening his grip around the girl, “we have to celebrate, we got the plan in motion.”

You twisted in Pope’s arm to look at JJ, ignoring the ache in your heart that you were so used to by now. “Rule number whatever, JJ, no talking about the plan in front of outsiders,” you snapped. JJ rolled his eyes at your words, loosening the grip on the touron before turning to whisper something into her ear. The girl giggled at what he said, making you raise a brow and cross your arms in front of your chest. “What?”

“It’s nothing,” JJ smirked, taking another chug of his beer.

“It’s clearly not nothing, JJ,’ Pope chimed in, annoyance evident in his voice. JJ resisted the urge to roll his eyes at his friend’s voice.

JJ looked at you intently, leaning back on the driftwood as he popped his tongue on the back of his teeth. “I just told her that you get a little jealous sometimes, to ignore whatever you say.”

“You’re a dick, JJ,” you muttered, taking Pope’s cup from his grasp and chucking it at JJ. The caramel-colored liquid splattered all over his t-shirt causing him to jump up at the sensation, bringing the girl with him but you had already stalked off in the direction of the chateau, ignoring his shouts of protest.

When the remaining pogues relocated to the chateau, you excused yourself from the comfort of Pope’s embrace on the couch in the living room and strolled out to the backyard to get some fresh air. The alcohol was wearing off, the effect that it had on you previously forgotten about as you breathed in the air, raising your arms up and stretching. It was nearing one in the morning, echoes from the chateau could be heard when the backdoor opened and closed, but you were too lost in your thoughts to notice your best friend walking towards you.

It wasn’t until two arms snaked around your waist from behind that you were startled from your thoughts, the familiar smell of his aftershave wafting around you. JJ rested his chin on your shoulder, pouting at you. “You know you’re my best girl,” he mumbled into your ear.

Trying to release his grip and shake him off, you sighed when you failed, resisting the urge to melt your body into his chest. “Where’s barbie?” you snapped halfheartedly.

“That doesn’t matter right now, you’re upset,” he tells you, and you twist to look at him, narrowing your eyes.

“I’m upset because you were a dick.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” JJ sighed, he quickly glances towards the chateau and you roll your eyes.

“She’s waiting inside, isn’t she?” you snapped, and when he doesn’t reply, you scoff and rip his grasp off you, creating a big enough gap between your bodies. You stalk towards the house, stopping when he calls you back. “What, JJ? I’m going to bed, I have to prepare for the next step in your oh so great plan,” you hiss, throwing your arms in the air and letting them fall dramatically.

“y/n-”

“Oh, and you can fuck barbie on the futon. Pope and I are taking the spare bedroom.” JJ’s face falls at your words, the anger simmering from your pores. You watch him bite his tongue, waiting for him to say something, pushing him to argue with this but when he doesn’t respond with a remark, you smirk at the fact you won this argument. “Goodnight, Ken.”

Tag list:

htbah taglist:

@solllaris @drewswannabegirl @starrystarkey93 @httpstarkey @sweetlysilent @drewstarkey @dontjinx-it @ultranikilove @spencereidbasis @meaganjm @starlightstarkey @thortheestallion @jiaraendgame @idocarealot @tempestuousjj @pink-meringues @dpaccione @arianabrashierstuff @softstarkey @loveylangdon @xenagzb @teenwaywardasgardian @prejudic3 @nxsmss @canibeoneofthepogues @nqbmf @outerbanksbro @obx-direction-sos @digniteas @annedub @colorful-queen-of-the-roses @yesp0ny @loveniallandharryonedirection @fantasticpsychicfanfish @girls-breaking-hearts @beautyandthebleh @casper17

rodeo rafe babies who said they were interested:

@royalmerchant @outerbankslut @honeyycheek @jellyfishbeansontoast @ilovejjmaybank @kindahavefeelingskindaheartless @girlsru1eboysdroo1 @https-luna @butgilinsky @rae131415

diverdcwn everything taglist:

@velyssaraptor @danicarosaline @copper-boom @x-lulu @prejudic3 @downbytheouterbanks @ilovejjmaybank @bricksatanakinswindow @sunwardsss @rudyypankow @im-a-stranger-thing @alexa-playafricabytoto @maybankfullkook @sortagaysortahigh @socialwriter @bluesiderudy @anxietyandtacos

#rafe obx #rafe x you #rafe x reader #rafe x y/n #rafe imagine #rafe fanfiction #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron series #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron #rafe cameron angst #freyby writes #diverdcwn writes

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tuanhood · 5 years ago

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miss goody two shoes

pairing: drug dealer!bambam x reader

genre: smut, angst?

warnings: 18+, language, drug use/mention, fingering, dirty talk, public and unprotected sex.

word count: 6k+

summary: you want to prove to everyone you’re not the good girl they all think you are. your best friend’s drug dealer? perfect choice.

a/n: hello back with that smut everyone loves. this is unedited and quickly(ish) written so please don’t judge. it took me until 3:36am and two aperol spritzes to finish this SO. YAH.

“Do we really have to do this right now?” You asked your best friend, trying to keep up with him as you follow him through the city.

He stops for a moment and turns back to look at you as if you’ve just confessed to a murder, “y/n are you kidding me? Do you really think I can deal with an interaction with Gretchen not high?” Jae shook his head at you and continued walking forward.

“It’s just brunch! I doubt you’ll even interact that much!” You hated walking with him, because of his damn long legs. His strides were honestly too much for you.

Jae huffed in disagreement, “I need it regardless. Now come on, we’re almost there.”

When you had agreed to a brunch date with a few friends from college including your best friend, you hadn’t really thought meeting up with his drug dealer right before was a part of the plan. Sure, many of the people the two of you went to college with were insufferable, but for some reason whenever they’d reach out to you to make plans you would always find yourself saying yes and ultimately drag Jae along. He constantly told you that you were too nice.

Specifically, Gretchen – a girl who had lived across from you your second year of University – was the most difficult to deal with and usually her and Jae would end up in passive aggressive arguments that made everyone at the table uncomfortable. So, you guessed that if meeting Jae’s drug dealer was a part of making that issue vanish, so be it.

By the time of you reached a small park square in the middle of the city, you felt a burning in your legs from trying to keep up with Jae and crashed onto the first bench you see. He looked down at you massaging your legs and chuckled, “we barely walked a mile, calm down!”

Rolling your eyes, you looked up at him through your lashes, “easy for you to say. You’re not the one trying to keep up with a 7-foot giant.” He doesn’t reply, but simply snorted at your comment and looked down to check his phone, “when is your guy getting here? We’re going to be late if we wait here for too long and you know how that’s gonna be a whole thing if that happens.”

“Don’t worry, he’ll be here soon,” Jae assured you.

And sure enough, after a few moments you heard a loud “Dude!” leave your best friend’s mouth and looked up to see a man enter the park square. The man returned Jae’s enthusiastic welcome with outstretched arms as he walked towards the two you, giving Jae the “guy handshake” as soon as he’s in reach.

When he’s out of the handshake with your best friend, you begin to take in his features and were surprised by how much this guy didn’t look like a drug dealer. Most of the drug dealers you had seen or heard of had a casual style to them – hoodie, somewhat presentable and maybe on the weirdly older side. This guy was not that in any way shape or form. Everything about him screamed Paris fashion week and your brain was trying to process how this guy could be a drug dealer. Maybe he made that much money? Judging on the very expensive watch he was sporting and the Cartier ring on his middle index finger, you believed that it had to be the case.

“Y/N,” Jae said snapping you out of your thoughts, “this is Bam.”

You stood up from the bench and dusted yourself off, looking at the two men suspiciously, “Bam? Is that short for something?”

The dealer shrugged, “Bambam I guess.”

You can’t help but notice the way he scans you up and down, checking you out. You tell yourself he’s looking at you in an effort to feel you out and see if you’re a snitch or nark, but the nervous flip in your stomach tells you maybe it’s for a different reason.

As though Jae noticed the strange interaction between the two of you, he claps his hands loudly, “let’s get to it then, shall we?” Bambam simply nodded his head and fiddled with the clearly nonprescription glasses on his face, “Right… how much do you want?”

“An eighth should do.” Jae confimed.

Bambam began to reach into his bag and stops, “that’s it?”

Your best friend pursed his lips in thought, “actually if you have molly that could be good too. I’m supposed to be going to my stupid racist aunt’s wedding next weekend and it would be much better on something.”

Bambam shook his head sadly and clicked his tongue, “sorry man. There’s some music festival this weekend and all those stupid frat dudes wiped me clean on acid and molly. But I should be getting some more next week if you want to meet up again.” You swear when he says the words “meet up again” you see his eyes wander to yours, but as quickly as they’re there, they’re back on Jae.

You heard a groan leave Jae’s throat in annoyance, “whatever I’ll get through it sober, I guess. I’ll just take the weed then.” Bambam nods his head and hums, “cool.”

You watch as Bambam meticulously takes a small clear baggie out of his bag and places it inside of larger black sack, “I’ll throw in a free edible too, since you’re my number two customer and all,” Bambam laughs. The noise that leaves his mouth is almost melodic, and you can’t remember a time where someone’s laugh put you at ease. You felt a smile reach your face.

“What the fuck? I’m not number one?” Jae complained.

“Nah man, Mark’s got you beat there.”

Jae shook his head, “Fucking Tuan.”

Bambam and Jae laughed at his response as you stand there clueless as to who this Mark person was or why it was funny that he was Bambam’s number one customer. It’s when your eyebrows furrow and there’s a small frown on your face that Bambam’s gaze is once again fixated on you. “Does the pretty girl want anything?”

Before you can answer or react at Bambam calling you a pretty girl, Jae answers for you, “She doesn’t do this kind of stuff.” You roll your eyes annoyed at him just deciding what you do and what you don’t do. Just as you’re again about to open your mouth to speak, you’re cut off but this time by Bambam.

“Let her speak for herself man,” At that your heart warmed and you feel your face grow hot at how a drug dealer you barely know was treating you better than your own best friend. Bambam nods at you as if to go on and you felt yourself sputter your words out, “No… I mean he’s- well I guess he’s pretty much right. I don’t really like- um well do that stuff. Not that I have anything against it! I totally don’t! You know I’m like friends with the number one stoner in the area- or I guess number two since that Mark guy is number one? But anyways it’s just not for me so I- yeah so no… No drugs for me today.”

You feel yourself want to hide in a corner as you turn to see Jae with wide eyes and looking at you as if you should be in a mental institution. Somehow, you turned to face Bambam, expecting him to also categorize you as a psycho for your rambling, but instead he has a smile on his face and chuckles. His smile was practically as bright as his overpriced watch.

“Totally understandable. I don’t do any of this stuff either,” Bambam revealed.

“What? But you’re like a…” you begin, drifting off and unsure if “drug dealer” was a polite term to use in this day and age.

“Drug dealer?” He laughed, “yeah I know… But you know not everyone tries their own merchandise.”

You frowned, not completely understanding, “but shouldn’t you try and know your merchandise so you’re better at selling?”

He shrugged, “I guess when you’re selling drugs it really doesn’t matter,” Bambam shocks you by taking a step closer to you and reaching out to push a strand of hair that had fallen in front of your face, “or I’m just really good at what I do.”

Taking a step back, he smiles at you and you hear Jae clearing his throat, clearly uncomfortable at the situation, “so how about those drugs?” Bambam simply nodded, unfazed and handed Jae the bag as the latter slips him the cash.

You became confused as you watched Bambam handle the money. He was doing something so simple, but looked so attractive doing it? Absentmindedly you felt yourself bite down on your lip as you watched him count and place the cash in his money clip. You were lost in a daze of watching his hands and the money that you didn’t notice his gaze back up to you, “don’t bite down so hard baby girl, you never know what could happen.”

Jae coughed again, still awkward about your interactions with Bambam. You on the other hand felt him calling you “baby girl” go straight to your core, so much so that you pressed your legs together. Praying he didn’t notice; you found your eyes wandering to anywhere that wasn’t the drug dealer.

Bambam took your silence as a sign, “well I better get going. Have other stops to make this morning.” Jae nodded, simply thankful to not be caught in the middle of whatever this was any longer, “yeah us too.”

“See ya later Jae, you too y/n.” You still feel semi-dazed from his words that all you can do is wave him goodbye, and watch him walk out of the park, the opposite direction of where you and Jae came in from. Bambam turned around one final time before exiting the park completely, “remember! Say no to drugs!” he shouted over his shoulder, shooting you another smile.

As soon as he’s out of view, Jae turns to you, “let’s go. I want to roll this and smoke it before we get to the restaurant.” You follow Jae out of the park the way you both came until you both stop at a corner of the street that is inconspicuous and hidden enough that Jae can roll and light up his joint.

“That was weird right?” You asked Jae suddenly when he finally lights the joint.

“I think he was flirting with you?” Jae said as more of a question than a definite statement. You couldn’t tell if he was asking you or himself. Your friend’s ponderance was enough to confirm your suspicions and cause your stomach to flip. A small smile spread across your face and you see Jae look at you with a frown on his face.

“Dude chill, he’s just my drug dealer.”

His dismissal at the small amount of joy you felt for being flirted with annoyed you that you felt yourself soon go silent besides the odd cough here and there caused by the smoke induced by the joint.

When he was finally done and you began to walk to the restaurant, you felt yourself picking up your pace, walking far in front of him. When it soon became difficult for even him to keep up with you, he came to the realization that you were upset with him, but nonetheless Jae continued to try to talk and reason with you as you approached the restaurant where you were meeting your friends.

You didn’t say single word to him until you were sat at the table with everyone and asked him if he wanted to split a mimosa pitcher with you. At your words he felt thankful to know you had let go of what he had said earlier and nodded in agreement.

“Ooh a mimosa pitcher for y/n? Pinch me because I must be dreaming,” Gretchen said overhearing your conversation with Jae.

Another one of your college friends Brian laughed, “Yeah but Jae will probably finish most of it. We know y/n can’t really hold her alcohol.”

Why did everyone suddenly choose today as the day that they would make fun of you? So what maybe you weren’t as crazy as them when it came to certain things, but you weren’t a fucking nun like they were making you out to be. So what you didn’t get blackout drunk at brunch? So what if you got excited about someone flirting with you? Even if he was a drug dealer.

“That’s not true,” Jae said coming to your defense, clearly trying to make up for how he had upset you earlier, “honestly y/n can drink me under the table.”

Gretchen waved her hand in dismissal, “come on Jae we all know that’s not true. But that’s what we love about her! She’s our sweet pure friend! Every group needs one of those.”

“If she was pure would she go with me to see my drug dealer?” Jae asked.

Gretchen smiled, “Jae are you high right now?”

“Yeah I need it so I can fucking deal with you,” he practically growled. She laughed in response as if he was joking, when he was in fact not. “That’s so funny. It’s not like she would ever buy or do any though.”

You felt helpless watching this argument – about you – unfold. Moments like this made you feel like maybe you were too nice. Why couldn’t you just say something and defend yourself? Jae shouldn’t be the one doing it. You should be the one arguing with Gretchen.

“Well who cares because my drug dealer thinks she’s hot!”

At Jae’s confession you feel everyone turn to look at you as if you can offer some kind of explanation, but you’re just as clueless as everyone else on the topic of “my best friend’s drug dealer thinking I’m hot.” Jae must really be trying to make up for earlier.

“It’s true, he just messaged me like 15 minutes confirming he would bang her.”

Your mouth drops open. Turning to look at Jae you can’t tell if he’s being honest or just making things up for the sake of arguing with Gretchen.

“Okay y/n having sex with a drug dealer is probably the last thing she would ever do.”

“Um is this a brunch topic?” One of your more silent friends at the table, Mina asked clearly wanting the discussion to be over.

Finally, you feel like it’s important that you’re the one to end this weird discussion about you having sex at 11am at brunch. You rolled your eyes, “I am not some untouched Mother Theresa, Gretch.” She flinched at the nick name; you knew how much she hated being called that.

“I mean you what? Have had sex with only two people? Both who you had long term relationships with? That sounds pretty untouched to me.”

The table shifts uncomfortably and no one says anything in response, it isn’t until the waiter approaches the table to ask everyone if they’re ready to order that you feel yourself snap back into reality.

“A mimosa pitcher please,” Jae ordered and soon all eyes are on you as the waiter waits for your response, “add one more pitcher to that.”

Jae leans over to you, “we don’t need two.”

You smiled at him, “no this one’s for me.”

After the “discussion” at brunch, the atmosphere between you and everyone else clearly shifted. You predicted that they probably wouldn’t be calling you to get together for a while. For that you were thankful.

Both you and Jae headed to your apartment in silence and you tried not to be fixated on the topic of your sex life and how “pure” and “good” you were, but your mind kept lingering there. It infuriated you how much you cared, because you knew deep down it really didn’t matter. It caused you to feel off for the rest of the day. So much so that it felt as though you blinked and it was suddenly dark outside. Brunch had been hours ago, but you were still you were thinking about the words exchanged.

“Hey um… I was wondering… can I have his number?”

“Whose number?” Jae asked barely paying attention to you. He leans against your bed on the floor and had been engrossed in a game for the last 45 minutes.

“Bambam’s…” You said quietly, hoping that maybe just maybe your best friend was in a strong enough trance that he would just hand over the number without registering whose number it was exactly and not ask any questions. But of course, you weren’t so lucky.

“Really?” He asked placing his phone down in his lap to turn to you laying on the bed, “why?”

You shrugged your shoulders nonchalantly, not wanting Jae to see just how nervous you were, “I don’t know… Maybe I want to like pick up or something.”

He snorted, “Y/N… You don’t do drugs.”

“Okay but maybe I’ll start!”

He rolls his eyes and picks his phone back up, assumedly to return to his game, “We both know that’s a lie. You’re a goody two shoes and everyone knows it. The way you coughed this morning when I lit up is evidence enough.”

There it was again. Too nice. Goody two shoes. Pushover. You were so fucking tired of hearing it all today. In fact, you were tired of hearing it all the damn time.

Instead of arguing with Jae, like you knew you should have done, you found yourself rolling over to stare at the ceiling of your bedroom, “You’re right… I’m just a good little girl,” you mumbled. Silence soon filled the room and Jae felt himself tense up; he couldn’t deal with you being upset again. Rolling his eyes, he swiped up on his phone to exit his game and searched through his contacts.

You suddenly felt something being nudged against your body and looked to your side to see Jae’s phone open with the contact “BAMBAM (PLUG)” glowing up at you.

“I don’t know why you really need it, but there it is.” You smiled at your best friend and sat up quickly to copy the contact into your own phone, “thank you Jae.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”

Later after Jae’s departure, you find your thumb hovering over Bambam’s number. Would it be too much to call? He probably wasn’t used to it in his line of business… Maybe it was just usually a texting thing?

To be completely honest you weren’t sure why you wanted his number… You weren’t sure if it was for drugs to prove everyone wrong, that you can in fact be bad or if it was for something… else. You thought about what Jae said at brunch… Did Bambam really text him that he would bang you? Did you want that?

The idea of having sex with Bambam certainly didn’t disgust or repulse you, instead you actually found yourself blushing at the thought and pressing your thighs together.

Holding your breath, you clicked his number and opened a new message.

y/n. hey… bambam. It’s y/n… Jae’s friend? We met in the park today…

bambam. Oh hey sup?

y/n. was just wondering… if maybe I could like idk pick up?

bambam. Ummm…. Hold on a sec.

You waited for what felt like eternity… He was putting you on hold? On hold through a text?

bambam. What do u need?

y/n. uh whatever you have on you I guess. Or like in stock ? is that how it works?

bambam. Haha something like that. I have mj, addy, coke, k, oxy lol pretty much anything u want. But like I said earlier today I’m out of acid and molly till next week.

y/n. yeah yeah yeah… okay. What’s k?

bambam. haha you’re so cute. It’s ket.

y/n. ??????

bambam. Ketamine. Horse tranquilizer.

y/n. okay… well I will not be doing that one. Can you just bring like a couple things and I’ll decide when we meet?

bambam. Um????? I guess so??

y/n. cool.

bambam. I’ll meet you at the park, I guess? In around an hour?

y/n. yeah that sounds good!

bambam. Bet.

You felt your heart beat out of your chest. Were you really just going to do this? What is it that you were going to do?

Looking at the time on your phone, you realized you needed to get ready and leave quickly if you wanted to meet Bambam on time. It was going to take you at least 40 minutes to walk to the park where you had met him earlier. Walking instead of calling an Uber would give you enough time to think, but also enough time to perhaps talk yourself out of it if you changed your mind mid-journey.

Although somehow, it hadn’t. Your mind on the walk over had been filled with Bambam, but not in a negative way that convinced you to turn around and head home… but in a way that had your core pulsing. You thought of what he had said to Jae earlier – true or not – and how he would take you if that’s what he wanted. It made your mind hazy and the lust that took over your thoughts caused you to barely notice that you had arrived at the park, Bambam already seated on the bench that you had been massaging your legs on earlier that morning.

He was sporting the same outfit he had been wearing earlier – a satin striped button up shirt tucked into tight black jeans and his clothing was enough to remind you of the reality of what you were doing here. To your dismay he was no longer wearing the glasses, in the fantasies that had fluttered into your mind on your walk, you had really grown in wanting to see Bambam’s glasses on as he fucked into you.

Approaching him, you shyly waved and he stood up to greet you, “hey…”

“Hi,” you replied feeling foolish at your choice of welcome. What were you supposed to say to seem more… cool?

“I don’t usually don’t take drop offs this late at night…”

You furrowed your eyebrows at him confused, “what? You’re a drug dealer… Isn’t night the best kind of time to do this stuff?”

“Nah night I work on my music. So, what’s up… You change your mind?” He tapped his foot impatiently and you can’t tell if he’s nervous about being in your presence or if he’s annoyed that you called him out here so late. But if he didn’t want to come… why would he? You took a deep breath in, hoping you were doing the right thing, “No… I-I lied I don’t want to pick up. I just- wanted to see you I guess?”

Even in the darkness of the park, you could see Bambam’s eyes widen in surprise, “see me? Why?”

You’re really not sure what’s supposed to happen next. You’ve never been in this situation before and although it seems like all of your friends' words drove you to text Bambam and come here, it was your own needs that were driving you to stay.

Deciding to take a risk with your questioning, you looked away from him, “Is what you sent to Jae true?” Bambam quickly blinked, unsure of how to respond to your question. He wasn’t sure if he needed to be honest or not. Were you mad at him for what he had said?

Instead, he clears his throat and decides it’s always best to tell the truth, “Um yeah what I said is true…”

You felt your stomach flip at the fact that the text Jae received was in fact true.

“Do you… still want to?” You asked shyly, still not daring to make eye contact with the beautiful man.

Bambam’s cock twitches at your question. Suddenly his jeans feel way too tight.

“Fuck yes,” Bambam replied, voice low and husky. It takes everything in him to not lunge forward and have his hands roam up and down your body, but he restrains himself, “where should we go? Mine? Yours?”

“Let’s do it here.”

Your words surprise both Bambam and you, but you ultimately decide to go with it.

“Here?” he asked, interrogating whether or not you were being serious. What if this was a joke? Before you can stop yourself, you nod, “yeah, here.”

He takes a step closer to you, until his hand moves forward to cup your face, “I knew you were bad girl when I met you.” His words go right to your core and you feel your panties grow damp. Typically, you would find that kind of talk cringe, but coming out of Bambam’s mouth all you wanted was to hear more of it.

Instinctively, Bambam groans at the thought of having his way with you, and he uses his free hand to grip your hip, hard enough to bruise and pulls you flush against his chest. He doesn’t hesitate as he leans in to press his lips to yours in a feverish kiss that leaves you breathless. His confidence surprises you, but also turns you on enough that you instantly moan against his lips.

You feel him smile and it feels as though you’re in an entirely different world than just a park square in the middle of the city. Bambam’s tongue brushes the seam of your lips before his tongue slips inside to explore your mouth. You feel him begin to pull you into the depths of the park, closer to the trees where it would be less visible if someone just so happened to decide to walk through.

The two of you stand there for what felt like forever and you feel surprised at Bambam’s clear want of wanting to take his time with you. His hands moved from your hips to your ass, his fingers kneading the flesh roughly as he makes himself familiar with your taste. He pulls himself away from the kiss, chest heaving and cheeks flushed. You whined at the loss of his lips on yours, but he simply stares at you, taking in your kiss swollen lips and the lust-filled look in your eyes. He had to admit that it was difficult to believe that the girl in front of him now was the same shy girl he had met earlier, but knowing you had this side to you made him want you even more. He drops his head to press his lips to your neck and you can feel his teeth scraping the sensitive skin on the column of your throat as his hands move to dip beneath the hem of your shirt.

After leaving a few marks, he pulls away just enough to tug the t-shirt up and over your head before his hands move to cup your bare breasts. Not wearing a bra was probably the best idea you had all week.

“Fuck… y/n your tits are so pretty,” he breathes against your skin as he returns his mouth to your neck, “I could just play with them all night.”

As he gently kneads your breasts, you feel yourself clench around nothing. You were overly sensitive from not being touched like this in so long, that you felt as though you could cum just from his hands on your breasts.

You attempt to focus on the kiss in an effort to control yourself from not letting go so easily, but soon Bambam’s hands release your breasts and seamlessly drag down your stomach to the button on your jeans. He snaps them open instantly and hooks his thumbs on either side, shoving them down, along with your panties, down your legs. Your sudden nakedness causes you to shiver as you feel the cool breeze of the summer night drift over you body. Bambam notices this and places his finger against your lips, “shh baby girl let me warm you up.”

Reattaching his lips to yours, Bambam gently pushes you against the tree behind you and you feel his fingers drift to your core and swirl around your entrance. The feeling of him where you need him the most is enough to cause you to moan and you can’t help but notice how he disconnects from your lips when he feels at how wet you are.

“Jesus y/n, you’re so wet. Are you sure you didn’t cum already?”

Wordlessly you shake your head almost violently to tell him you hadn’t.

“I don’t know if I believe you… a bad girl like you might lie,” you feel one of his digits slip into your slightly, only part of the way but not fully and you feel as though you’re about to scream at the teasing. You should have known that Bambam wouldn’t give you want you wanted that easily.

“I-I’m not lying,” you stuttered out between your attempts to hold your moans back.

He fully inserts the finger into you, curling it a bit and you can no longer stop the noises that want to leave your body, “If you’re not lying, I guess I just have to see what my baby girl looks like when she cums. How wet she gets, how tight around me, hmm?” You can’t find it in you to respond, you simply nod and he smirks at you, clearly proud at his efforts to make you so weak so quickly.

It isn’t long before, without warning, you feel him insert a second finger, pumping them inside you at a teasingly slow pace. You felt like you were going to break, because you just needed more.

“Bam p-please I-I need more.”

He played dumb, frowning at you, “need more what?”

“Faster, more,” you manage to breathe out and without a word he picks up the pace of his movement, a smirk on his face and lust in his gaze. It’s when he suddenly curls his digits, hitting just the right spot that you feel like all sanity and speech has left your body. How can something feel this good?

“Come on, cum on my fingers. I know that’s all you want. I’ll let my bad girl have what she wants, just this once.”

His words spur you on as you find your arms moving to the back of you to grip onto the tree for stability as you buck your hips further onto his fingers, wanting nothing more than in this moment to have a release. The combined effort of his finger curling and his thumb coming up to tap on your clit in an almost musical rhythm has you falling apart and releasing around his fingers. He can feel the shaking of your thighs and the tension of your body as his fingers work to let you ride the waves of your orgasm.

Bambam’s length which had been growing hard since the moment you asked if he wanted to fuck you, suddenly felt painful as he watched you fall apart from just the pure pleasure he had caused. He couldn’t wait any longer, he wanted and needed to be inside you.

“Ride me,” Bambam says without hesitation as soon as you’ve caught your breath from your orgasm. Despite your release which had only occurred moments ago, you felt yourself ready to go once again at Bambam’s words and at how quickly he worked to remove his clothes.

Instinctively, you licked your lips as you first laid eyes on his painfully hard and leaking red cock which had been desperately waiting for its turn. You wanted nothing more than to get your mouth or hands on it – preferably mouth – but as you reach forward, Bambam shook his head.

He sat himself against the tree, not caring about the fact that he was sitting on the actual ground in the middle of a public park. The only thought he had in his mind was getting inside of you and feeling how tight you would be when you sank down on him for the first time.

“Baby girl, let me feel you.”

That’s all it took for you to get into position and find yourself squatting down to sit in his lap, rubbing your slit against the head of his cock, ready to take in every single inch of him. At the feeling of you rubbing yourself against his sensitive cock, Bambam groans, “no teasing, I just need you. Please.”

His begging and more submissive request turns you on and it leads you to wonder if maybe that would be a side of yourself you would want to explore later. But for now, you just needed to feel him inside of you.

Slowly, you lowered yourself onto him, moaning at how good it felt to finally have him around you, stretching you out completely. It had been awhile since your last sexual encounter and with the way Bambam was filling you, it almost felt like your first time again – this time there was no pain however, only pleasure. “Fuck… Bam.”

You just sat there for a moment, enjoying the feeling, until you felt him ever so slightly shift and then heard a groan. His hands instinctively landed on your hips as he attempted to get you to move, he almost couldn’t take how snug you felt around him, he wanted you bouncing up and down on him at a brutal pace. Understanding his want, you lifted your hips barely an inch before falling back down on him. Every time you did it you went a little bit higher.

“Come on I know you can do better than that,” Bambam egged you on despite his groans. At his words you leaned back, placing your hands on his thighs, giving him a much deeper angle into you. As you rode him like this, he began to thrust up meeting your hips and every time he did his cock hit a spot inside of you that made your eyes roll back into your head.

Your movement on him began to grow sloppier as a shot of pleasure made itself known throughout every part of your body. At your sudden change of pace, Bambam held your hips to continue moving you up and down on him, his own thrusting becoming faster. “You feel so fucking good. Damn maybe I should just stop working and fuck you all day,” you felt yourself clench at his words and he continued, “you’d like that huh? I can feel how tight you’re getting just at the thought of me using you and filling you with my cum every single day. Such a dirty girl.”

You could feel your walls clench, and Bambam let out a groan having to thrust harder just to keep going as deep, “I’m- gonna- fuck.”

Somehow, not out of breath, Bambam whispered into your ear, “You’re gonna what? Cum? Do it… Cum all over me in this fucking park where anyone can see. I know how much want it so just fucking do it.”

You were seeing stars and your thighs were shaking once again when Bambam reached in between your bodies, pinching your clit, finally making you fall apart. Although you had once been concerned about being loud because of the public aspect of your location, you found yourself unable to contain your screams when your orgasm hit you. You could feel your juices dripping down onto his thighs as he pulled out of you and pumped himself one final time, released his seed onto your stomach and chest. As he caught his breathe, you dipped your finger into his release which had begun to drip down to your thighs. Placing it into your mouth, you suck it gently. “Mmmm,” you moaned at the taste and Bambam stared at you wide eyed. “Um fuck… should we do a round two?”

You laugh at his response and the lustful gaze that still clouds his eyes, “maybe… not here?”

Bambam grasps his discarded shirt and begins to wipe up the mess he left on your body, as well as the mess you left on his thighs. The gesture warms your heart.

He hums in response, almost lost in a trance as he wipes you up. “I mean… I know I’m just a drug dealer,” he said laughing, “but how about I take you out for a late night dinner slash early breakfast and then we have a round two where I enter you from the oh so classy doggy style position?”

You laugh and grab his hands, stopping him from continuing to wipe you up, causing him to look into your eyes.

“Deal.”

#got7 fanfic #got7 smut #bambam smut #bambam fanfic #bambam

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miss-choco-chips · 5 years ago

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Reverse Robin au

I wanted to try my hand at both Reverse Robin au and childhood friends DamiTim. So, Headcannons for all!!!

In which Damian goes from thinking Tim has cooties, to imagining him in leather. Oh, and he trains to be a hero in between.

Or, in which Tim goes from sassing Damian for being a prick, to sassing him because it’s their own special sort of foreplay.

They are seven and eight, respectively, when they met.

A part of Damian still believes girls have cooties; Timothy is no girl, but his best friend and usual companion is one, so he can’t be that far. Besides, he’s seven, a baby. Still, Mother and Father insist he plays with him, and he loves them too much to say ‘no’ when they ask something so earnestly.

Tim, a hand gripping his mother’s dress, takes one good look at the Wayne Heir, the hand offered to him and a superior sneer on his face, and then glances at his mom.

‘He’s a prick’, he tells her with his eyes. She smiles benevolently down at him, but he catches the answer behind her Lady facade: ‘I know he is. Still, behave.’

While Mother and Father exchange pleasantries with the Drakes, Damian shakes hands with their son. As Heirs of the two most powerful families of the city (and arguably, the country), they are bound to see a lot of each other.

The boy, Timothy he introduced himself as, has a very pale, very soft hand. No calluses. Damian, a martial arts enthusiast, can’t help but scoff.

The kid looks him dead in the eye, apparently not missing his reaction. With a completely angelic smile, and the most passive aggressive voice Damian ever heard, he tilted his head and asked.

‘Is there something on your throat, Mr Little Wayne?’ ‘No?’ ‘Oh, then you’re just a naturally unpleasant person’

Before Damian can even answer with a good comeback, the little boy is walking away towards where his friend, Stephanie Brown, daughter of Miss Brown, the head catheter of this events, is waiting.

Damian is left standing, hand still out where he was shaking the kid’s own, mouth agape as he watches the little brat just leave him. His parents must have missed they ‘conversation’, but Mrs Drake hasn’t, if the equally exasperated and fond look in her eyes was something to go from.

From then on, every time they met, the little monster seemed to have a comeback ready. No matter how Damian prepared himself for their little greetings each time they bumped into the other at a party, Timothy always had some answer waiting under the tip of his tongue, both cutting, smart and deceivingly innocent.

‘Tsk. Again with Brown, I see. Can’t you do anything without your little shadow?’ ‘I can explain to you what friendship is, but I don’t think I can help you understand, sadly.’

‘Damian, I feel twice as happy seeing you as I did last time!’ ‘I’m sure you do…’ ‘Yeah. What’s two times zero?’ ‘...you brat’

‘Timothy. Your suit looks… as nice as it could, given the circumstances, I think‘ ‘And yours looks… well, I guess it’s nice to see not everyone is so obsessed with appearances’.

Both Brown and Mrs Drake seemed to find their exchanges amusing. He’s glad someone does, for he finds them exhausting and full of frustration. The little brat was seven, he shouldn’t be able to always have the last word. Damian was a Wayne. It was unbecoming.

Still, it was… better than aimlessly follow his parents around. And he could always brag about his physical training success, which never failed to bring a frown to Timothy’s face.

He noticed too how his hand was starting to gain callousness over time. Apparently, someone was bitter about Damian’s training.

When his parents died, murdered in cold blood in front of him at the tender age of ten, he thought himself alone. Then Alfred came for him to the police station and hugged him as tight as Dad used to do, and Timothy walked right to the front seats on the funeral and held his hand during it all.

He had lost his parents, but there were people that cared for him, still. He couldn’t allow himself to fall into despair; he needed to keep this from happening to anyone else. He needed to protect the city his parents had loved.

Back in the Mannor, he endured as countless of strangers gave him their condolences, swallowing his desire to spit in their faces. None cared. Fakes, all of them; in their eyes, he was but a wealthy, vulnerable child, an open door towards the Wayne fortune.

Timothy’s hand in his, calluses more notable each day and cold eyes keeping the worst of the worst away, kept him in check. He left his side shortly, speaking with his mother in whispers, before coming back and tugging him away. Mrs Drake, as the Waynes most close ally, took Damian’s place in thanking people for their support.

In his room, safe from the world, he broke down in the other child’s arms. Timothy, just one year younger but so much frailer, kept a tight grip on him, arms around his back and back straight, eyes to the door. A show of strength, of protection; you can cry, I’ll keep watch.

Damian starts his training. Alfred calls master after master, in acrobatics, swordsmanship, hand to hand combat, forensics, everything that would keep his young Master from giving up and quitting on life. Anything to keep him busy, and moving.

Damian finds it humorous, how Timothy looks at him the next time they met at a party and frowns, obviously noticing the trials his body is going through on the lines of it. Something no one else seems to see.

He doesn’t tell Timothy he doesn’t need to work himself to the bone to be equal to Damian, he doesn’t need to catch up to him, because he’s already on the same level, his sharp mind and calculating disposition enough to make up for the breach in physical strength. He doesn’t say this, because wit can only take you so far, if your opponent is stronger than you, and every bit of knowledge Timothy amasses in his quest of showing Damian up could potentially save his life one day.

He likes that their exchanges are still the same; even in the darkest times, he can trust the newly turned 13 year old to be a passive aggressive little brat.

‘Oh, Timothy, it seems you’re still focusing more on your studies than… more practical areas’ ‘Somewhere out there, there’s a tree tirelessly producing oxygen so you can breath. I think you owe it an apology’

‘You seem ill, Timothy. Or is that shade of white natural to you?’ ‘Oh, I was feeling a little unwell, hence why I came to see you. They say laughter is medicine, and your face is already curing me’

‘It smells like something is burning. Damian, are you trying to think again?’ ‘....as always, you’re such a pleasure to meet with’ ‘I know, you’re welcome’

It lacked the bite it used to have, tough. Timothy was as ready to talk back at him in his bitchiest voice, as he was to ruthlessly humiliate anyone trying to fuck with Damian.

When he left the city, seeking to better himself for his mission, he and Alfred were the only ones he was sad to leave behind.

He traveled for years, safe in the knowledge that Mrs Drake was looking out for his company and her son, and that Alfred would be taking care of the Mannor and preparing everything for his return in a few years.

HE exchanged letters with Timothy. Calls could be intervened, and as long as him and Timothy spoke in code and never revelaed anything too personal, there was no problem with keeping physicals reminders of their ever growing bond.

He met Talia when he was fifteen, who in turn introduced him to her father. They both seemed to take a liking to both his abilities and goal, and took him in for training. She seemed to think of herself as a mother figure, as she kept pating his head and calling him ‘my own’, and Ra’s’ eyes would shine with greed during the times he took Damian’s training into his own hands.

He left before turning eighteen, when talks of successors and adoptions became too unbearable. His only parents were dead, and he had no intention to replace them for such dark, shady figures. Besides, no matter how close their objectives seemed at first, the more he knew them the least they sounded like philanthropists. Terrorist, was a more fitting label.

He turned 21 on his first night back in Gotham. Alfred, who never failed to bake a cake for him despite his absence the last seven years, shared it with him with teary eyes.

The morning after that, Timothy came to see him.

It took Damian’s breath away.

He was still shorter, and at this point it was a sure thing he’d always be, but small height didn’t mean his charms were as well. His skin remained as white as he remembered, eyes icy blue, both in color and the feeling they gave off, hair even darker than Damian’s framing a delicate face.

His hands were rougher than he remembered, though. More calloused, packed with extra strength. Damian could tell, because the first thing this enchanting man did upon them meeting was to slap him. Hard.

‘I know everyone is entitled to act stupid once in a while, but you are really abusing the privilege, Damian. Seven years? Seven? And spent, what, three of them in company of the Al Ghuls? Are you always this dumb, or you just like showing off when I’m around? This doesn’t impress me, you know. I’ve always known you were an idiot, it’s not news anymore’

‘How…?’

‘You might think yourself above all others, smart wise, but please remember I’m someone you never won a battle of wits against. I know everything about your little world trotting, because I have spies, and about your time with the League, because I’ve known Ra’s for way longer than you. Also, your stupid little hero idea…’

‘Spies again?’

‘Alfred. Somehow, he thinks I can make you change your mind. I might be hailed as a saint by gothamites, but I certainly can’t work miracles’

Tim left eight hours later, after discussing both Damian’s travels and plans for the future. He had way more information than Damian had guessed, and had been silently but steadily growing his network of contacts and spies, and had his dainty little fingers in more pies than a baker. He growled at him, called him stupid, told him he was going to get himself killed if he pushed forward with the whole ‘Batman’ idea, but… When he left, it was as a ally. He’d support Damian, do his best to keep him well informed, and deal with over the table crimes, while Damian took care of the ones under it.

He fell in love, a little bit. Or, more accurately, fell more in love. The seeds have been planted years before, when a seven year old sassesd him and left him eating his words. Now, through… the dark knowledge he had amassed, the sharpness in his eyes, the deceptively frail appearance…

Something twisted in his gut, in a nice way. He went to bed that night, and started to think in other aliases that would go nicely with Batman.

Wouldn't Timothy look dashing, in leather and kevlar?

#Tim Drake #Damian Wayne #Reverse Robin au #love reverse au #Batman Damian #spymaster Tim #Janet Drake is also a good mom here because #SUCK IT DC #pre damitim #Alfred Pennyworth #my writting #headcanons

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croc-odette · 4 years ago

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i love ds9 and here are some episode premises that i wish had happened

DND EPISODE: already talked about this but a dungeons and dragons holosuite episode. jake is the overly prepared DM obviously, nog, ziyal, and alexander are players. nog’s player is clearly his idea of sisko, a lawful good paladin; ziyal plays as a cardassian rogue (played by dukat, but clearly based in personality on kira); alexander plays a mage who is kind-of worf kind-of jadzia and keeps switching between them through the game). there’s an NPC version that’s clearly also based on sisko at one point, but from jake’s point of view knowing him as his dad to compare how differently jake and nog, a cadet, see him.

as the game progresses, it becomes clear that the Big Bad is based on a combo of dukat/winn (corrupt government/religious figure). ziyal struggles with the classic DND question of ‘just because i would do this, does that mean my character would?’ except she’s realizing that her dad wouldn’t do any of the selfless things she wants her character to do. alexander keeps trying to solve shit through weird cantrips or puzzle solving instead of fighting and jake is like ‘it’s not deep it’s just a cave bat please roll initiative’. bashir and garak show up as like, the old couple from the princess bride and everyone has to be like ‘jake they’re not dating in real life this rpf shit is kind of inappropriate’ and he’s like ‘wait what? i thought they were dating’. miles is an NPC and dies. nog thinks jake’s-sisko-npc is too silly and disrespectful and jake is like ‘he’s MY dad’ and they have to take a break to argue about it and jake is like ‘your dad is cool too’. nog’s character changes to lawful good paladin rom. actually this whole game is ‘arguing about dads’ time now that i think about it, which jake is not really equipped to jump in on since he has a normal cool dad who he basically just thinks is embarrassing because he’s the ~messiah~ or some goofy bullshit. ends with them calling it a day after the final boss battle and then jake and nog privately talking about whether or not they can trust ziyal if she has to choose between ds9 and dukat, which was an ulterior motive of the game. ziyal is clearly clearly rattled by what the game made her realize and goes to see kira, who she doesn’t tell about the game but who still gives her a hug, and ziyal realizes that kira’s her hero (and like, her mom). alexander tells worf and dax about the game and dax thinks it sounds fun as hell and asks alexander if they can come next time, and worf is like ‘....... only if i can be a blood mage’. nog and jake go home and tell their dads they love them.

shit i blacked out

PRANK WAR EPISODE: escalating series of pranks starting with jadzia putting hair dye in bashir’s shampoo and ending with the space station accidentally going into a meltdown self destruct scenario. garak is torn between helping jadzia and quark, who are clearly the better pranksters, or helping julian and odo, who suck at pranks but are his lunch friends. everyone has to tell garak that he’s way too intense about ‘pranks’ which are actually just really dangerous booby traps he puts in people’s quarters. sisko ends the episode by grounding everyone; no holosuites for a month!! yes even dax

GREAT RACE EPISODE: there’s some kind of macguffin resource on a planet (a klingon escape pod with a survivor with crucial intelligence information?), but they can’t teleport directly to it. a vorta and jem h’dar team and a ds9 team beam down on opposite sides of its location and are both racing to get there first, having to macgyver together vehicles and tools on the way. lots of excellent outdoor on-location settings and comparison of the jem h’dar/vorta dynamic and the ds9 federation dynamic. ends with the jem h’dar almost winning but turning on the vorta at the last few yards, and sisko’s team beams out as the jem h’dar chant victory. no i refuse to think this is same plot as ‘the ship’ or whatever

KASIDY EPISODE: set earlier in kasidy/sisko’s relationship, kasidy agrees to go with jadzia as a third-party observer to negotiations with a nearby bajoran colony over a trade agreement with the federation. jadzia and kasidy bond over gossiping about sisko on the way, but once they get there kasidy disagrees with the starfleet’s contract during negotiations which causes tensions, and recommends that the bajorans reject it. she and jadzia get into an argument about starfleet and its ideals, and why kasidy chose to be an independent captain rather than a starfleet captain, and how that doesn’t make her lesser than starfleet captains. jadzia realizes that kasidy is right and petitions superiors for a new contract, which kasidy approves of. they go home tenser then when they left, but when sisko asks jadzia what she thinks of kasidy, she very seriously says that she has incredible compassion, intelligence, and integrity, and that she doesn’t need or want jadzia’s approval. but has it anyway

MUSICAL EPISODE: someone already outlined a great musical ep where lwaxana comes in with a betazoid cold and it makes everyone burst into song in another text post and like 100% cosigned

SHAKESPEARE EP: holosuite shenanigans; every character is suddenly stuck as someone from a different shakespeare play. garak is an enthusiastically combative beatrice, kira is cordelia, worf is hamlet, jadzia is a very amused katerina, julian is puck, miles is duncan (”i get MURDERED?”), odo is benvolio and kind of bummed he’s not romeo, etc. i actually don’t know any shakespeare play that well but i think it could be neat. julian is the only fucking person on ds9 who actually knows any of it well enough to figure out what’s going on, except for sisko who doesn’t really care for shakespeare but generally knows about the plays (maybe a good opportunity to talk about the racism in most ‘classic Earth’ pop culture that star trek tends to uphold without criticism). i don’t know shit about the 40 plays that shakespeare wrote about british kings but i could see sisko ending up in that kind of intense role and refusing to play into it, as do the rest of the characters who refuse to fulfill their respective roles and instead find another way to end the program.

KLINGON OPERA EPISODE: goodddddddd can we see some klingon opera, mac. i’ve been dying to see some klingon opera. premise is they believe that someone is assassinating ambassadors and so they tag along with a andorian ambassador who loves opera to see if they can figure out who the assassin is, however the andorian plays it down as over-worrying and that they should use it as an excuse to enjoy themselves. worf and jadzia go and have a lovey dovey time, sisko and kasidy go and have a lovey dovey time watching worf and jadzia get super into the opera together. julian is asked to go in case there’s poison used or first aid needed, and miles is like ‘the last time i went undercover i came home with trauma and someone’s cat so no thanks i hate klingon opera’ and after some increasingly overt passive aggressive implications that julian should take HIM, julian asks garak to go with him. bonus points if for some reason they are wearing the stupid tuxedos from doctor bashir i presume. a lot of loud arguing about the opera which almost gets them kicked out. at the end of the first act, one of the actors DOES try to kill the andorian but jadzia jumps in front of the phaser beam (cue worf being very concerned and annoyed that she could have gotten killed, jadzia being very smug and pleased with herself, her head in his lap, in a pose mirroring an earlier couple in the opera). julian feels like he would have noticed if he hadn’t been distracted by garak, and when it turns out the andorian ambassador has sensitive info about cardassia’s civilian government, julian accuses garak of intentionally trying to distract him to make sure the andorian actually died, which turns into a huge argument (ideally in a very opulent klingon opera house bathroom). during the argument, julian realizes that garak was trying to hint to him that something about the assassination attempt was off; he pieces together aloud that the andorian and the actor must have been in league together, to fake the andorian’s assassination so they could not be tried for profiteering by illegally selling weapons to the cardassian central control during bajoran occupation, which they are currently under investigation for. the other ambassador assasinations were planned by the andorian to cover their tracks. the andorian is arrested, as is the actor. at the ballroom afterparty, sisko and kasidy, in a good mood that everything worked out, agree to join in on traditional klingon dancing. worf and jadzia take a peaceful walk through the gardens and worf recites some really lovely klingon poetry about how sometimes it’s NOT a good day to die if someone loves you, that none of us fucking understand without looking it up. julian and garak talk on the balcony, and julian posits that garak is loyal to cardassia, but which part of it? garak answers, very close and meaningfully looking at julian, ‘like most things... it’s complicated.’

i was about to say ‘fake wedding episode’ but literally LITERALLY that was the shotgun wedding lwaxana/odo ep. i love star trek

KEIKO BOTANIST EPISODE: kira accompanies keiko to bajor to help find a medicinal plant that was thought to be wiped out during the occupation but might still exist in a remote mountain region based on local reports. a nice episode where we learn more about bajor and see how bajorans are coping and healing. over a campfire, kira thanks keiko for accepting her into their family. keiko tells kira that she was really intimidated by her when they first met, and then realized she’s one of the most loving people she knows. just a nice episode, maybe some mild nature survival conflict, but ends on a hopeful note of them finding the plant. miles beams down with the kids to have a picnic with keiko and kira, and kira’s happy to see children playing carelessly on bajor again.

JAKE AND ZIYAL EPISODE: everyone thinks jake and ziyal are dating because they’ve been hanging out. julian’s an idiot and mentions to sisko ‘must be hard, huh’ and sisko’s like ‘WHAT must be hard’ and julian’s like oh my god were we not supposed to talk to him about this. jake and ziyal aren’t dating but as soon as sisko tries to talk to jake about it jake is like ‘i’m not but actually maybe i SHOULD ask her out’ and sisko is like fuck. okay no that’s fine. this is more of a B-plot but basically give jake and ziyal age-appropriate love interests they’re both RIGHT there

#i'm really about to write fake screenplays for episodes for a tv show that ended 20 years ago #star trek blogging #THIS GOT OUT OF HAND.

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very-grownup · 4 years ago

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The Year is 2020 and I Watched Neon Genesis Evangelion for the First Time, Part 2

Episode 8.

Misato takes a bunch of teen boys out on a military rendezvous thing because she is at the point in her life where they are the only ones who think she is cool and don't judge her for her terrible lifestyle and alcoholism.

We meet a new friend, Asuka, who has red hair and is German (to contrast with Rei who has blue hair and is Japanese). She establishes her dominance by slapping teen boys and refusing to be embarrassed when the wind blows her dress over her head. She thinks Shinji sucks because he has poor self-esteem and empathy is hard and society does not have an understanding place for teen boys who manifest their issues through passive depression. She has an EVA and she loves getting in the robot because it is cool and powerful and strong. Her EVA is red which does make it objectively the coolest of the giant robots so far. She comes with her own inappropriate adult guardian named Kaji who has poor boundaries, does nothing to deter her crush on him. Kaji sabotages Misato as an authority figure by flirting with her and alluding to a sexual history. I guess it makes sense because fourteen is a prime age to begin noticing people sexually and the combination of that and the adolescent desire of the tantalizingly distant adulthood makes that one hot, relatively young teacher you have a fascinating source of fantasy.

All of the boats are named after Shakespeare plays except for the one called "Over the Rainbow". I like this.

This is the first episode where I notice Shinji is referred to as something which the subtitles have decided to call the "Third Children" so that I know these are bad subtitles that would rather be literal than good even though this is my first time watching the series!

A majestic sea pancake with teeth attacks from the water and basically all these ships are fucked and probably a lot of sailors die and Asuka gets in the robot and makes Shinji also get in the robot because she wants him to know how cool her robot is.

Asuka seems like the kind of girl who doesn't expect her peers to like her and who will pursue the approval of cool adults instead and doesn't mind not being friends with her peers as long as they fear/admire her because those are more reliable feelings than friendship.

Kaji /fucks off/ while the boat is under attack because he's not actually here to protect Asuka and these teens AND the giant robots are super disposable. Misato briefly thinks he's going to be helpful before realizing he's ditching. I feel like that's probably a lot of their dynamic - Kaji letting Misato down even though each time he shows up part of her thinks maybe he won't suck. This is probably Misato's relationship with a lot of people. There's a reason she drinks.

There's a cool underwater fight scene which is also a city destroying fight scene because the cities of the 20th century are underwater due to Incidents. They refer to the power plug and the cord Asuka's robot is attached to as the umbilical cord and hey I hate that. The only two remaining battleships get fucking jammed into the sea pancake's mouth simultaneously like hotdogs and then blow up and that's considered a win. /So many sailors are dead from this incident/.

Kaji fucking ditched to bring Shinji's dad a briefcase with some fucking space blob DNA encased in a fancy casserole dish and they refer to it as Adam and fuck you know nothing good ever comes from things named Adam. This concludes my report on Episode 8 of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

Episode 9 and 10 behind the cut.

Episode 9.

Asuka hates being in Japan and all her peers hate that she's in Japan. Asuka derives her self-worth from excelling at something she is used to having no competition in (piloting a giant robot) and being homesick just pushes that need harder. Shinji is upset because Asuka's aggressive and enthusiastic approach to the thing he is most frightened of makes him feel like less of a man and also less grownup. Also she has boobs and he is fourteen and girls existing is maybe as distressing as giant robots.

Someone in this episode realizes that having fourteen-year-olds pilot the giant robots is both a stupid and embarrassing decision when Shinji and Asuka's poor teamwork cause an Angel to duplicate itself which is the opposite of giant robots.

There is a lot of giant robot slapstick in this episode and it's very good and I laughed.

Kaji has stuck around to sexually harass Misato and make her workplace awful and make everyone, including Misato, not take his harassment seriously because they used to date so it's not harassment it's just falling into an old bad habit and it's depressingly realistic.

Misato is made entirely responsible for Asuka and Shinji's slapstick failure even though Asuka is supposedly Kaji's responsibility. She comes up with a very stupid plan to help them synchronize via DDR and being humiliated in front of their peers. Humiliating teens IS funny. But it also feels cruel when you consider Misato is the closest thing to an ally Shinji has. How much of Misato's poor decision making (with respect to the kids' emotional wellbeing) is a result of Misato living her best worst life and how much is the result of Misato being stressed out and doubting herself and her decisions and so much else because of Kaji's constant negging and flirtatious presence? She's already in over her head with the Shinji situation.

Shinji and Asuka are forced to live together in Misato's tiny shitty apartment and do everything together and in tandem and it's mostly a comical training montage of how much they hate each other.

There's a night when they're alone and they steal the opportunity for privacy. Asuka sleepwalks onto Shinji's futon and she still has boobs and Shinji is still 14 and he moves in to kiss her while she's asleep, until he realizes she's crying for her mother in her sleep. He removes himself from temptation, realizing that Asuka's just a fucked up kid, too. But it's a realization that comes with resentment: he wanted that fantasy of the peer who is also a sexy, confident grown up because it makes Asuka both an aspirational power fantasy figure and a sexual fantasy and if she's just a messed up kid like Shinji she can't be either.

It's sad because the whole episode encapsulates how NERV is failing these kids as well as why. Misato makes Shinji and Asuka figure out how to synchronize and work together but in a bad shitty way where they don't really understand each other because this is the military. Misato's job is to defeat the Angels and doing that efficiently and quickly takes priority over Shinji and Asuka's well-being as individuals. So, it works in the moment, but they aren't any closer to each other or understanding each other. There is no /time/ for empathy.

Their synchronized battle at the end of the episode against the duplicated monster is visually very cool and exciting and dynamic and a great sixty seconds of animation and it's clearly mostly a light gag episode to support the resources going to those sixty seconds. But that's sort of sad too, isn't it? This concludes my report on Episode 9 of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

Episode 10.

Okay so we started Beastars which has some really gorgeous use of colour that manages to echo the distinctive and striking style of the manga while being very much its own thing and we end the night with Madoka where tonight were time loop death pacts, so the Evangelion episode kind of got overwhelmed.

There's an Angel egg in the depths of an active volcano and Asuka's giant robot has to be put in an adorable space suit so as not to be crushed/melted by the pressure. Asuka's got a box to trap the egg in. I think they want to get the egg out of the volcano because if it hatches in the volcano it'll explode but they don't seem to have a plan for what to do with the egg if they manage to remove it from the volcano (they don't, obviously; egg hatches and has way too much mouth).

The main takeaway is that Shinji's dad is 100% ready to fucking nuke his son if it's necessary to stop the volcano from volcanoing with the Angel? I'm not actually clear on this point, but I am clear that Commander Ikari will nuke his son, possibly for many reasons.

It ends with Misato taking the kids to a hot spring because they couldn't go on their class trip to Okinawa (even though surely all the beaches are radioactive?). Surprisingly, you do not see the ladies in the hot spring, although Shinji gets a boner hearing Misato admire Asuka's breasts and skin. A penguin is the first creature to see Shinji's erect penis. This concludes my report on Episode 10 of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

#neon genesis evangelion report

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