#they are very specific burgers mad by my dad

[wolfram-but-art]

i have art block but i just had a burger (more like 2,5) so perfect in flavour combination and texture that i wanted to cry and life was so beautiful and all my worries went away it was like a spiritual experience this picture represents maybe 1/6th of what that felt like

[gatakat]

surrender | part 2

"You must think I'm some kind of monster, hiding from my fans like this"

Sakusa peeked carefully behind the column. That little kid and his dad were still there, in line waiting to make their order. He looked back at you. The smile on your face was gentler than... Well, gentler than what he could have possibly expected after what just happened.

"I know you play volleyball because you enjoy it, not for fame." You replied.

He peered into your expression, looking for any sign, any minuscule twitch of your facial muscles that could reveal that you were being sarcarstic. Or condescending, which would have annoyed him even more. He couldn't find anything.

“How magnanimous.” He said, looking away from your big honest eyes. And he realized it came out more insincere than he intended.

You really were a good person. That was the conclusion Sakusa had come to after two months of riding the train with you, and of watching you excel at your job at MSBY Black Jackals.

It made him feel... inadequate, in a way, seeing you outperform all the other team managers by a very long mile, not just efficiently doing what you were told but additionally always keeping track of every minuscule detail that needed caring. From who usually needed more water than the rest, to who was taking a certain medication that week, including running after Miya whenever he forgot his umbrella in the lockers and delivering personal messages to Bokuto from his old high school friends. Hell, you had reminded Barnes of his upcoming anniversary with his wife when he'd forgotten, and even suggested various examples of last minute gifts he could get.

Why were you like this? Did you really have that much extra time and energy to be wasting it into other people's needs like this? Sakusa knew he could never spend one minute more than strictly necessary caring about others to that extent. He knew the other managers were like him too. But you... you seemed to have learned, in just a couple of weeks, which specific fans gave Sakusa the biggest headaches, and you had mastered the art of lying to shoo them away.

The company policy was to lick the fans' asses as much as possible. And yet, you were doing things like tell them that Sakusa had already left home even though the truth was that he was hiding away in the locker room.

No other team manager had ever done something like that for him, and Sakusa wasn't 100% sure he liked how that made him feel because he always took care to be prepared for every situation. He hated people who were unprepared. So why was he needing someone to save his ass like that?

No. It definitely rubbed him the wrong way. And yet he could't possibly get mad at you. Not when you looked at him with those big, thoroughly honest eyes of yours, crinkled into a bright smile...

You were smiling at him.

Sakusa blinked.

It was a beautiful Summer night in downtown Osaka. Nights always made Sakusa feel safer somehow. It was like the World spinned more slowly at night, and he could take things at his own pace with no outside pressure.

Besides, tonight it was burger night with Bokuto and the guys and the city was vivid as ever, full of people going home from work and students around their age just hanging out.

Sakusa had come to enjoy watching all this hectic pace around him, as long as it didn’t get too crowded. He took that as proof of his progress with his anxiety. Nowadays, all the noise, activity and lights around him, combined with his friends’ constant laughter, had turned these burger nights into something Sakusa had secretly come to cherish, like a surprisingly fun break from routine. 

What he wasn't so used to, however, was you participating in them. But you were a nice girl, a good person, so he didn’t really mind. Besides, Bokuto had insisted and insisted until he'd exhausted everyone's patience. 

And you coming had been a good thing, after all, because, as Sakusa waited in line to get his order at the counter, you -always vigilant and helpful- had approached him to alert him of the presence of one of his more annoying fans.

He hadn't been expecting to hear your voice calling out to him at that precise moment, however, so he'd unthinkingly swatted your hand away from him, a startled look on his face.

And you -always patient and understanding- hadn’t paid it any mind. You hadn't cared that he’d pretty much barked at you not to touch him. Instead, you had just grabbed his sleeve and pulled him towards a hidden area by the restrooms.

“Sorry for hitting you earlier.” Sakusa said.

You laughed.

“I’m going to accept your apology because, even though you didn’t hurt me, you could have done it very easily with those huge hands of yours!”

Sakusa’s silent gaze made you visibly restless, and you backtracked immediately:

“It’s fine, though. Really.”

Even after your reassuring words, Sakusa still felt uneasy.

It would have been easier if you'd just yelled at him. But you had to go and be a good fucking person again.

You waited with Sakusa behind the column until the little kid finished ordering and finally sat down, and then, when Sakusa's order number was called, you went and picked up the burger he'd bought. And, just like that, that ill-fitting feeling took place in his chest again.

Guilt, Sakusa thought. He felt guilty.

Sakusa looked around him. It felt like he'd been hiding behind the column with you for an eternity. The others were probably wondering where you'd gone.

“C'mon, let's go.” Sakusa said as soon as you came back with his order. And something in the back of his mind was reminding him that he hadn't even thanked you, but the need to shake that uncomfortable feeling off his chest was more pressing, so he ignored it. “Bokuto is going to get nervous if he can’t harass you some more before we leave.

You maneuvered the tray to hold it in one hand and hit his shoulder with your free one.

“Sakusa-kun!” You said, the mirth in your eyes betraying your offended expression. “He’s not like that!”

A smile tugged at the corner of your lips. You genuinely seemed to enjoy Bokuto’s attention too, but you still took no real offense from Sakusa’s joke.

“Ah, no?” Sakusa quipped. “My mistake.”

You were a nice person to talk to. Banter with you came easily, like you adapted to Sakusa’s sense of humor. Maybe he could thank you later.

Bokuto hogged you during dinner, and Miya and Hinata afterwards, when the five of you took a train to Miya’s apartment to play videogames. You lost to them by an abysmal margin, and it had all of you laughing hysterically. It had been very long since the last time Sakusa laughed so hard he ended up in tears. He really was glad you came tonight.

Much, much later, you and Sakusa said your goodbyes to Miya and the guys, and shared a cab home. You were practically falling asleep standing by then. He took care to make sure you safely got inside your building before telling the driver his own address, and it wasn't until he got home that he realized he'd completely forgotten to thank you. 

Shit, he thought. He'd gotten carried away. It wasn't like him.

thanks for reading!!

i made some changes from the ao3 version and i like this chapter a lot more now wehehehe

previous chapter | next chapter

[motherofmabari]

Thank you @gvnseylike for the tag! I enjoy doing these 🥰

Share your wallpaper

I use a wallpaper changer lol. Currently there's 271 in rotation, some are my own art, some are from various fandoms, some are my pets, stuff like that. It's biphobic to make me choose 😘

The last song you listened to:

😅 Take Me Away from the Lindsay Lohan/Jamie Lee Curtis Freaky Friday movie, actually. Best fictional song imo

Currently reading:

Bookclub with my dad - All About Love by bell hooks

Book buddies with my best friend- Shadow and Bone/working our way through the Grishaverse by Leigh Bardugo

I also listen to a fuckload of audiobooks at work, just finished The Sharper Your Knife, the Less You Cry by Kathleen Flinn. Now I'm revisiting Arc 8 of Unprepared Casters, will prolly finish that by Friday and idk what's after that. Reccs literally ALWAYS welcome I have headphones on a solid 6 hours a day minimum

Last Movie:

I think it was Glass Onion? Been on more of a TV kick lately

Craving:

It is so close to strawberry season and I am *dying* for some good strawberries. There's a strawberry farm 2 minutes from work and every day I look to see if their sign is up cause the second it is I'm buying a pallet

What are you wearing right now?

Black bandeau and comfy shorts, basically my jammies

How tall are you:

5'4. I am short and squishy.

Piercings:

I had my ears pierced as a kid, suffered for years trying all the different earring materials until I finally gave up and accepted that my body doesn't like being pierced and will die mad about it

Tattoos:

One on my back right hip, of my late pet rat Mungojerrie. I've had a total of 12 rats in my life (usually 4-5 at once) and adored them all, but Mungo's pattern was most suited to a tattoo so she represents my lil mischief. I want more tattoos but those cost money I don't have rn, so someday

Glasses? Contacts?

Either! Depending on the outfit. Wearing glasses a lot lately because I got some really cute glasses chains

Last drink:

Currently have two on my end table, water for hydration and Dr pepper cause it's tasty

Last show:

Bob's Burgers, the episode where Teddy pretends to be into hurling and Louise attempts to turn herself into an Avatar of the Buried by sacrificing Tina to a watery grave for a gd rusty ball jfc that was stressful my anxiety was through the ROOF

Last thing you ate:

McDonald's chicken nuggets. Is a lazy kind of night

Favorite color:

Green

Current obsession:

Mild hyperfixation on the grishaverse after season 2 of the entflix adaptation prompted a series reread

Unrelated obsession:

Dragon Age, specifically Dragon Age 2. It's my never ending hyperfixation lol

Any pets:

Two dogs, two cats, and a leopard gecko. The dogs are Ruby, a Doberman mix from a local rescue with separation anxiety that the rescue was not up front about, love my boy but I am *mad* at that rescue, and Angel, a byb min pin adopted from a friend's grandpa when he had to go into assisted living. The cats are Boris, an orange tabby adopted as a kitten from our vet, and Rangi, a calico adopted as an adolescent from the same vet a year later, after our first cat Natasha passed away. Last there's Heihei, the leopard gecko I adopted from the petsmart where I worked at the time after he was blinded by an eye infection and they couldn't sell him. He's a cool little dude.

Do you have a crush on anyone?

I am in a happy long term relationship lol

Favorite fictional character:

See answer one and don't be biphobic 😇, you get two - Fenris from Dragon Age 2 and Keladry of Mindelan from Protector of the Small. I adore them both and honestly for very similar reasons despite their vastly different backgrounds and personalities.

The last place you traveled:

Day trip, I went about an hour and a half away to ~nearby largeish city~ to see Hadestown and it was *incredible*. Overnight, I honestly have no idea, it's been like 7 years at least but it'd probably have been the last time I visited my Florida grandparents instead of the other way around, they've been spending half the year in our state lately and I can't afford to travel to visit them there. Yay adulthood.

Blank -

Share your wallpaper

The last song you listened to:

Currently reading:

Last Movie:

Craving:

What are you wearing right now?

How tall are you:

Piercings:

Tattoos:

Glasses? Contacts?

Last drink:

Last show:

Last thing you ate:

Favorite color:

Current obsession:

Unrelated obsession:

Any pets:

Do you have a crush on anyone?

Favorite fictional character:

The last place you traveled:

Tagging @dragongeek1, @becauseanders, and @silly-goofy-mood no pressure or anything, just if y'all wanna! 🥰

[freehismindatnite]

Star Wars Modern AU headcannons ft. Single Dad Anakin pt 2

I managed to get brain rot from my own au lmao

Anyways this focuses more on the adults bc I've been thinking

Asajj was on Beat Bobby Flay once

She lost but people are coming to her restaurant more because they think it was rigged

So btw thranto is canon in this universe because I said so tee hee

Anyways Eli eventually leaves his accountant job and starts a restaurant called Cantina Tex-Mex because this is Texas, Eli Vanto is not portrayed as white so I made him Chilean and Mexican. ALSO tex mex is very good if done right.

He has an unreasonable amount of teenagers there on Fridays

He gave them a discount bc Asajj told (read: threatened) him to

Anyways Thrawn also makes specifically 2 gallons of Puerto Rican Chocolate Caliente (hot chocolate) every friday because he wants to watch the world burn

Literally every teen and tween loves that hot chocolate but he just makes 2 gallons then watches the mad scramble

Asajj makes a diner food and Romanian food mix

It's really good for date nights and the Skywalkers (plus Rex, Ahsoka,Barriss, and Obi-wan) to eat at for family dinners if something special happens

It's cool as hell she makes like Sarmale burgers so she has the patty be 2 actual Sarmale. Which is minced pork, spices, onions, and rice rolled in sour cabbage leaves and served with her hashbrowns potatos.

She serves Pepsi because she is a sadist

Ahsoka is a comedian as I have said before

Her content is all written by herself no ghost writers

She has had 2 Netflix specials so far

One of her jokes is about how her and Thrawn became enemies

Dr. Barriss and Eli are good friends so haha rivalry but your spouse will smack your dumbass for it.

They don't hit their spouses btw they just roll their eyes and pack up their crochet stuff.

Barriss and Eli met in middle school when other kids were being assholes to Barriss. Anyways they were friends ever since.

Maul, Savage, and Mother Talzin come visit one day

It's hilarious

No one really likes Maul

People think Savage is v nice

Mother Talzin is this 6 foot lady she terrifies the town minus the Skywalker twins and Los tres caballeros (Ahsoka, Anakin, and Obi-wan)

Anakin is a force of nature

He's an idiot with a clone of him

No like Leia is literally very much like him

Luke looks like him but other than that he's just Padme

Leia has done several things her father did

Everyone found it hilarious

Till she tried to jump off the roof to fly when she was 10

Poor baby had a big scar

Luke is also a fucking idiot I'd like to remind you, he has a insufferable martyr complex

Seriously Ahsoka, Barriss, Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Luke were playing Bedwars once and Anakin and Luke kept throwing themselves onto the fray

Annoying as hell sometimes

Anakin literally just told Ahsoka that doing drugs was cringe once so she just didn't

Anakin did though Obi-wan lectured him on why drugs are bad and it went in one ear and out the other

And by drugs I mean weed

Because it's my fake USA so I will make it how I want it

Weed is legal now fuck you

Anakin just calls things cringe then leaves

Like he told Palpatine he was cringe once

I dont think Palpatine ever recovered

Also Palpatine is homophobic

Lol he lives in gay people texas

Shaak Ti my beloved

Aayla and Bly are the peak of cool aunt and uncle

They are the aunt and uncle who take you to rated r movies when your 13

Anyways that's it I just needed to get that out of my system

[imaginesmai]

Sebastian Stan - We’re a team

Mixing two requests, @squishybebe​ about an interviewer being rude to the reader (I know you said flirtry, but this is what came out, I’m sorry!) and an anon about his son interrupting a meeting. I hope you all like it!

Plot: no interview is boring since having your adorable four year old son, who needs his father as much as he needs him.

To say that Sebastian was bored was an understatement. It had reached a point where he had just resigned himself with looking at the guy in front of him and nodding a little when required.

The questions were too predictable; how did it feel to be playing one of the characters in something as big as the MCU, how was it to work with great actors like Evans or Downey, and how had it been his work out routine that had gotten him fit for the films. The interview wasn’t anymore about his new film, Endings Begging, but more about gossip. Even if he didn’t talk much, the guy was answering himself as he did the question.

“And did you have to cut on any type of specific food, like burgers and other stuff?” he asked and didn’t stop to let him answer. “Because I’ve seen your TV spot about ‘cheat day’ and you seemed pretty eager – you actually ate it after it cut off?”

Sebastian gave him a tight smile, as the guy started talking again about the obesity in the united states. He had caught the camera guy dozing off a few times, and his manager was no where to be seen anymore. From all the interviews he had done, that was without any doubt the most boring.

And the worst thing wasn’t that he was stuck there with his tight jeans, it was that he had brough you and Luca to the plato in hopes of finishing soon and giving you a tour around. Your little boy had just turned four and everything with lights and colours was amazing to him; as long as he didn’t have to stay in the same place for more than a few minutes. He got angsty and started crying, and he already felt bad enough when the clock reached the hour in there.

“Would you say you’re a role model for little kids?” the interviewer attacked again. “With your violent characters and –”

He was cut off by a thud, and everyone’s attention went to the clear glass door, including Sebastian’s, his heart quite literally rocketing out of his chest when he saw who was outside the door. Before he could even react, Luca was jumping up and grabbing the handle, the door effectively swinging open so fast that it could have broken if he wasn’t a little kid.

“Daddy!” Luca screeched, his face red and tear-streaked.  “Daddy!”

You appeared behind him the next second, looking around wildly until you found your kid. He was way too fast for you to catch, and Sebastian watched as his four-year-old kid rounded all the tech equipment and ran into a woman’s legs. She stumbled and glared at him with such fire that Sebastian felt felt anxious, but Luca didn’t seem fazed, as he rushed over his dad with his arms raised.

It was then when he noticed the what the problem was, sympathy forming in his chest as Luca slammed into his legs. You were apologising softly to the people he had ran over as you jogged towards the pair.

“I – I had an accident!” Luca sobbed with such a despair that Sebastian felt his heart ache.

The whole team were all looking at him with their eyebrows raised, the interviewer going as far as scoffing and trying to look around for someone to fix it. You landed on your knees beside them and, even if Luca had ran from where you were playing with him, the little boy reached a hand for you to take.

It had been a month since the last incident, and Luca felt really proud of it. No more wetting the bed at night when he had to sleep alone and no more staining his favourite trousers when you took to long to go home. He reminded you every day that he was already a big boy, and that soon he would be wearing a cool suit like daddy when he goes to the ‘flashy place’.

Luca sobbed even harder when Sebastian rubbed a comforting hand against his back.

“Um, can someone – take care of this?” the interviewer chuckled, looking directly at you. “We were working here, and you’re kind in the middle of something.”

“Yeah, sorry. I’m sorry” you blushed in embarrassment, trying to pry Luca from Sebastian. The boy had an iron grip on his father. “It’s just – he ran out of the room, I’m sorry. I couldn’t hold him.”

“Yeah, well, you should. You can’t let him run off like that, he’s going to become a brat” the interviewer talked, missing how Sebastian was sending him glares with his eyes. “What kind of mother can’t hold his son?”

“Why don’t you keep your opinions to yourself?” Sebastian scoffed. “Come one, we’ll get you cleaned up, yes?”

His voice was softer when he talked with Luca. He placed his hands under Luca’s armpits and hoisted him into his lap, not caring about the expensive sweater he had chosen for the interview. Wiping the tears away from his son’s face, he pressed his lips against your cheek and assured you that it was fine. He watched Luca’s index and middle finger disappear into his mouth. Usually, he would tell him off, but even he felt anxious with so many people looking at them.

The guy got up too when Sebastian neared the door, wide eyes and gripping his notebook. He gestured to the camera to stop recording for a second and ran towards you.

“Why are you leaving? We aren’t over” he said as Sebastian looked back to him. The interviewer took a few steps back when he noticed the angry scowl on the actor’s face. He looked between you and him, hesitant. “She can – she can take care of… him. You know, let the man of the house work. You can’t… leave.”

He attempted to joke with Sebastian, chuckling, but he wasn’t having any of it. Instead of laughing and handing you Luca, he secured his grip on him and gestured you to open the door.

“I can and I will, actually” he answered as he bounced Luca up and down. “What you can do is never talk about my wife like that again, she’s as much as a parent as me, and she doesn’t need to take care of anything so that I can work. If you ever do it again, you can have a chat with my layer next, who will be very happy to hear from you”

Leaving the man open-mouthed, you left the recording room behind Sebastian closing the door behind you. You hadn’t looked up from the ground, only to check periodically on Luca, who was calming down now that he had his daddy with him. Still, there was a small proud smile on your face.

“Daddy?”

“Yes bubba?” Sebastian replied, looking back to check that the door was closed.

“Mad?”

Sebastian smiled softly as he stepped into the hallway, reaching with the hand that wasn’t holding Luca to yours. He gave it a soft squeezed, answering to your unsaid question and Luca’s one at the same time.

“Nah, it was being too boring without you. I’m always up for any of you if you need me”

Luca hid his face on Sebastian’s neck as you made your way to the spare room where you had been playing with Luca. The floor was covered in books, stuffed animals, and a few dolls that he had been playing with, mixing them in some childish fantasy about a castle and a lost prince. You didn’t say anything as you entered the room and let Luca on the floor. Bringing your travel bag, with spare clothes, you cleaned Luca in the small bathroom and changed his clothes between the two of you, putting the stained ones in a plastic bag.

You didn’t say anything as Luca talked the silence away with his ramblings about what his daddy had missed in the hour he had been away. He showed him the drawing he had done and Sebastian told him that he could go and play for a while.

Luca skipped away as you leaned against the sink.

“I’m sorry for letting him run away” you started, quite embarrassed that your four-year-old had crashed Sebastian’s interview. “When I realized what had happened it was too late, and he was already calling out for you.

“No, that’s – I don’t want you to apologize draga mea” Sebastian frowned. “I’m the one who has to apologize, I should have cut the interview sooner”

“You don’t have to cut any interview for us” you smiled at him. “I should have had a better hold on him. Your work is important, Seb, and we can’t go crashing –“

“No, my work isn’t important” he interrupted you, and with a long stride he was in front of you. “You’re important, cause you’re my family. And it’s fine if you interrupt an interview because Luca or you missed me, I can handle a few angry words from the team. But what I can’t handle is you thinking that it’s your duty taking care of everything, alright? We’re a team”

“Quite a team” you chuckled, looking down at the bag with the stained clothes.

“Yeah, but you’re my team, so that’s fine”

You didn’t say anything else and Sebastian leaned in for a kiss, in that small and shitty bathroom. Indeed, you made a good team.

Want to read more? Check out my side blog @imaginesmaimasterlists​, where I keep all the masterlists! Feedback is always appreciated

[taeminstetrislips]

School Trip Series-Italy Pt. 1

Johnny, Jaehyun, Xiaojun, Sungchan, and Renjun x (fem)reader

Rome

You finally arrive at the Rome Ciampino Airport. The first official steps you take on Italian soil... or... concrete. Your group from school gathers together for a quick head count and then to the travel bus to pack your luggage. After gathering on the bus, you almost choose to sit next to a random girl you had become acquainted with earlier. This trip was put together by one of your college professors who offered to take the students from his European Art History classes. However, only a few from your specific class time chose to come and most of the people were from other class periods. Before you commit to a seat partner, you hear your name being called from the back of the bus. You look up to see that the voice belongs to Johnny. He’s so loud this early in the morning, probably because he’s already on his second coffee, but you’re grateful for the invitation and choose to sit next to him. He was sort of the class clown and you’re flattered that he remembers you. His group of friends had some familiar faces in it as well. Xiaojun was the one that always got picked on before class started and constantly asked the professor questions during the tests; Sungchan was quiet but you recognized his face and only remembered his name because of attendance every morning; and Renjun was one of the visual arts majors that always offered a really interesting perspective on the composition of paintings.

“Thanks for sitting with me, these losers all ditched me for each other. I was worried I would have to sit with that girl from class who doesn’t shower,” Johnny says, causing the memory to resurface of the girl when you sat next to her the first day. You even had to change the unofficial-official seating chart the next class period to avoid her. That definitely wouldn’t be an issue here because these guys smelled surprisingly good. You couldn’t pin down whose cologne it was that was so nice.

“Is she on this trip?” you ask.

“I thought so. Maybe it wasn’t her,” he responds. You stand up to look around for her quickly but can’t see much beyond the other students loading the bus. Your eyes land on the person sitting next to Xiaojun and realize you don’t recognize him.

“Hi, I don’t know you yet. My name is Y/n.” You hold out your hand to shake his and take in the way his dimples deepen as he smiles and introduces himself back to you.

“Jaehyun,” he says. You sink back down into your seat after releasing his hand.

Johnny explains that all five of them were supposed to take the class together but Jaehyun’s schedule got changed somehow and he had to take it at a different time.

Xiaojun hugs Jaehyun from behind and says, “We missed him but it’s okay because we convinced him to come on the trip with us.”

“He even worked part-time with me at the front desk of the University Center to save up some money,” Sungchan chimes in.

As the bus lurches forward to start your journey, you start up a conversation by asking everyone what they major in and what year in college they were in. Your discussion is interrupted by your professor standing and announcing that he has a story.

“Now don’t be too worried but I may be a wanted criminal at our first location,” he begins. Multiple students interject with sounds of humor and surprise. You aren’t too shocked as he has often told your class stories of his rebellious past. It’s always the 400 level professors. “This happened a long time ago so don’t judge me too harshly. But, when I traveled to Rome the first time, I actually stole a small chunk of it.” A few students gasp. “Yes this is illegal. Please don’t do what I did, dear God. But I did get away with it.”

Some random person asks, “Why though?”

“Well you see there was this girl I was flirting with and long story short, I did it to impress her.” You can tell he’s a little embarrassed and most of the students are laughing at him. He says that the moral of the story is that airport security is better now than it was back in the 80s and you’ll probably be caught and arrested if you try to do it.

The trip doesn’t take too long and before you know it, you’re stepping out into beautiful Rome. You have a bit of a walk before you make it to the first stop: The Colosseum. Johnny stops abruptly and looks at the huge structure as if sizing it up.

“I think I could fit that in my luggage,” he says nonchalantly.

Sungchan pipes up, “What girl are you trying to impress Johnny? Y/n?”

“Yes,” Johnny looks at you, “Is it working?” You just respond by shaking your head no. He pretends to be upset by imitating a mad toddler and stomping his foot and pouting. The rest of the group just walks on without him. You can’t deny the architectural beauty of this ancient amphitheater. Smallish groups begin to form as you all start walking and exploring. The few of you choose to break off and head down to explore the tunnels underneath the exposed floor. Surprisingly there weren’t many visitors down there at that time besides you six. After a brief moment of walking and admiring it, Johnny abruptly pushes Renjun on the arm screaming, “You’re it!” before taking off into the distance for an abrupt game of tag. The others take off in different directions, turning behind corners and hiding wherever possible. Renjun complains first about not wanting to play but runs away anyway as soon as he catches a glimpse of Sungchan’s arm. You decide to hang back, letting them be unsure of whether or not you were joining the game. Soon you duck behind a wall and your heart starts pumping with the adrenaline of potentially being caught. Trying not to run too fast and be respectful. However, you end up stopping once Sungchan appears around the corner and chases after you. He grabs your shoulder and turns around to take off before you can tag him back. You take off after him anyway, still looking in each corridor for the other players. He manages to dip out of sight, but you spot Johnny peek his head out of one of the archways ahead. When he turns his head to look in your direction, you’re already running toward him, causing him to turn around another wall. Once you reach the passage that you thought he turned down you slow down to turn into it, only to be met with Jaehyun jumping out and scaring you. Your hands stretch out as if to block him. He must be unaware that you’re “it” because he grabs your wrists and pulls you deeper into his hiding spot, apologizing for scaring you and laughing simultaneously. His voice is pretty low when he laughs and you realize- oh my god- he has a dad laugh. It’s kind of wholesome though.

You ask, “Do you know who’s ‘it’ right now?”

He responds, “No I honestly have no clue,” then turns to look at you to be met with the evil look in your eyes.

“It’s me.” He tries to run from you but you’re already on his heels before you both see your professor walking toward you. You both immediately slow down your pace to a slow walk and do a bad job of acting casual as you pass him. Clearly out of breath, your professor walks past saying,

“Almost time to get going guys. And stay out of trouble,” before continuing on to look for other students. It’s hard to tell if he was judging you or not with his sunglasses on. Trying to hold back laughter, the two of you speed up to a fast walk and try to find the rest of your friend group. When you find Johnny, he’s already rounded up the gang.

You feel Jaehyun elbow you in the side and when you look to him in confusion, he just says, “You’re it,” and keeps walking. You jog to catch up with him pushing him as you pass him to meet up, shooting a look over your shoulder at him. He smirks, knowing this game isn’t over. You’re all guided back to the bus as you make your way to stop for lunch before your second destination. There’s a lingering exhilaration you feel as you never know when Jaehyun is going to “tag” you next. Sometimes he leans over to talk to Johnny, showing how easily he could just reach over and get you. When you get off the bus, he stands back and holds out an arm as if saying “ladies first.” With him right behind you, you feel the need to stay right up behind Johnny on the way out, but run into him once when you aren’t careful. You mutter an apology and he says it’s okay but you can feel a bit of heat run to your face in a blush.

Once off the bus, the large group is told that there are many restaurants and cafes in this area and we can choose whatever we like for lunch. Of course, your group sticks together as you make your way out to observe what looks good.

Sungchan jokes, “ We could always hit the Burger King we saw on the way back there.” You laugh, but Xiaojun is unamused.

He says, “There is no way the first meal I’m having in Rome, in Italy is going to be Burger King.”

“I think we kind of have to have pizza, right y/n?” Renjun inputs.

“I agree,” you say, pulling out the trusty old Google search of “pizza near me” So many options pop up and you offer a place that doesn’t seem to have prices too high. The guys all agree and you start your walk in that direction.

Once you arrive, the five of you are seated at the charming location and decide on two pizzas, one with seemingly inoffensive ingredients and one a little adventurous with pears and sweet gorgonzola. At first, you’re a bit hesitant to try the sweet pizza, thinking it will be like pineapple on pizza or something, but you can’t refuse when Xiaojun tries it and makes such a big deal of asking you to try while holding his slice out to you to take a bite. When you do, you understand his reaction because it really is very amazing. I mean, you should’ve expected this. It is real, authentic Italian pizza.

After finishing lunch, you make your way to the second location: The Spanish Steps. You can see that your group was running a little late because your professor quickly waved you all over toward the large group and explained that he was hoping to get a few group photos here because the location is so picturesque. Of course, you’d all be fighting for a spot but eventually after waiting a while, the professor was able to get someone to take a photo for all of you as you spread yourself out on the steps. He offered to also take pictures for any smaller groups or individuals who wanted a photo. You can see some people start to split off and pose for instagram feed pictures or take small group photos, then offer to take a picture for the guys.

Johnny protests saying, “Nuh-uh, you have to be in the picture too!” You can’t hide the smile on your face from feeling included while Johnny goes to ask your professor to take your photo. You all pose in a nice formation for the picture and then your professor counts down.

After he takes a few, he says, “Okay, now a funny one.”

They all try their best to do something funny or make a funny face. But you never know what to do during these so you look around at them for ideas and you’re just about to copy Sungchan’s peace sign and cheesy smile when you feel someone’s arms grab your back and behind the knees, sweeping you into a bridal style hold. It’s not until Jaehyun’s head sweeps under your arm that you realize it was him.

You look at him with a shocked expression and he doesn’t even glance at you while he smiles for the camera saying, “You’re it.”

Masterlist

There's part 1 of Italy! Let me know if you enjoyed this by liking or commenting on this post! Whichever trip photo and chapters get the most likes or comments are the ones I’ll update first so feel free to give me feedback! I’m thinking this will be sort of a choose-your-own adventure so you can read all the alternative endings with each member.

[britishsass]

some actor AU thoughts: some of the scenes with the aquatos turn into a race against someone's growth spurt when filming. also, augustus's break into acting was very lucky: his car had broken down, stranding their family circus somewhere where there was a movie studio doing a movie that, like mad max fury road, was basically two straight hours of Let The Stunt Actors Go Wild. they needed more acrobats for the stunts and look! acrobats! right here! oh they're surprisingly good actors too!

Here's some silly interview shenanigans (mostly about the Aquatos) which are partially based on what you're saying and partially just me avoiding my hw.

A. Aquato: We have to film everything for my darling children Queepie and Mirtala early because they're young and likely to hit their growth spurts soon.

Interviewer: What about Razputin?

A. Aquato: ...He's basically carrying the show. I worry so much about him, though-- He's just a child, and it can be very stressful. I've reminded him countless times that he can ask for a break at any time, and we can ask his great-uncles and great-aunts if they can do some scenes if he needs a break.

Interviewer: What's it like to have your whole family in this show?

A. Aquato: I'm so proud of all of them, but I keep feeling terrible for what they have to go through--

D. Aquato: Dad! We're fine! I like flirting with my girlfriend on camera!

A. Aquato: I know, Dionysus, but I worry about how your interactions with Razputin can create some... animosity. Amity? Animosity?

F. Aquato: Animosity.

A. Aquato: Thank you, Frazie. That, and the amount of times Razputin has been hit by those foam acorns. I know, he's wearing a helmet, but--

~

A. Aquato: I love doing the stunts. They've had to specifically ask me to stop doing the stunts. However, I did manage to convince them to let me set something on fire in one of these episodes! Just wait. I'm so excited.

~

A. Aquato: I wish they wouldn't villainize my aunt that much.

L. Mux: I like playing the villain.

A. Aquato: Also, if I wasn't supposed to be off-screen during some of these scenes, I would hug her.

L. Mux: Aw, Augie, you can hug me anytime!

~

Interviewer: What is your biggest wish for this show?

F. Cruller: ...I wish they'd stop villainizing Lucy and making me out to be a hero.

B. Zanotto-Fullbear: I wish I could get more scenes with my honeybear. At least you two get to hold each other. And have an actual kiss. Even if it's in younger makeup.

H. Fullbear-Zanotto: I want to hug my Bobbybear too, hon.

B. Zanotto-Fullbear: [Unintelligable as he buries his head in his hands]

C. O'Pia: I wish that I could help Booley during his panic attack scenes. Or that I could have more of a say in the more story-driven side of this show...

C. Boole: I wish I could have a nice scene of bowling with the others in the Seven. When we were younger, we did that a lot, so it would be nice to see something soft like that.

O. Mentallis: I wish I had a burger.

F. Cruller: Otto.

O. Mentallis: What? I mean, it'd be cool if I got a song.

F. Cruller: OTTO.

H. Fullbear-Zanotto: Ooh, a song! What kind?

O. Mentallis: A villain song, obviously. But not actually being a villain. Just that sort of show-stopping number. It's a stylistic choice.

~

Interviewer: What are your thoughts on the rest of the cast?

N. Johnnsmith: I've not had much time with a lot of them overall-- Except Bob, and the Aquatos, really. Oh, and Helmut! We had to work together a lot on how the one bit would work. The Aquatos are lovely people, really. I like them a lot-- Tala and Queepie think I'm a bad guy, but... They're young, so that's fine. Uhm... Bob's a nice enough fellow too. I keep worrying I'm bothering him by trying to ask him if he wants to hang out. You wouldn't believe how uncomfortable it gets on set sometimes. I've tried to ask him if he wants to play cards with me a lot, but he always makes excuses... Helmut's a great guy, of course. Everyone knows that, though. He's told me Bob likes me, just that he's bad with people, so I thought I might be overdoing it, but he told me that Bob likes that I still invite him, even if he says no, so...

Interviewer: You seem nervous. Is there a reason why?

N. Johnsmith: I've not actually done much acting before. I'm shocked I got a callback for this, let alone a role with so many incredible actors and people. And the fact that I'm playing a villain is... Wow. It sure is something, hah--

Interviewer: Do you like your role?

N. Johnsmith: I like to imagine they're customers. After years of working in retail, it makes sense to me. You wouldn't believe the endorphins I get from imagining that I finally got to yell at some of these terrible customers. I've got plenty of stories about them. There was this one who wouldn't stop asking me to look in the back--

[raeynbowboi]

Bob’s Burgers 10th Anniversary Retrospective

After ten years, Bob, Linda, and the Kids are just as delightfully wacky and endearing as they ever were, and show no signs of slowing down. So I wanted to put together an ultra mega review of the series. I’ll give an opinion on main and recurring characters, as with a cast this big, there’s been a lot of endearing characters to grace the show over the years. However, I will only be counting characters that have appeared more than once. After ten years, there’s been some real gems, and some real misfires. So, I’ll be counting down my top 10 best episodes, and the bottom 10 worst episodes. I’ll also go through as a Highlight Reel, by picking a best and worst episode of each season, as well as crowning the Best Season with the most good episodes.

Bob Belcher

Honestly, Bob was a very easy character to mess up. He’s the straight man to his wacky family’s antics. But the show does a really great job making Bob simple and lowkey without making him boring or a stick in the mud. He may be resistant to weird things, but he puts up with it anyway to make his family happy.  While he’s the serious straight man, they don’t fail to give Bob his own eccentricities and quirks that make him relatable and funny in his own way. Whether he’s making things talk, getting weirdly excited about Thanksgiving, or his awkward way of speaking, Bob is genuinely a good and relatable character. It’s also nice to see that Bob is a great husband and a loving father. He and Linda argue from time to time, but they’re not trapped in a loveless marriage for the kid’s sake like most shows. And even shows where that’s not a selling point like American Dad, Bob shows more remorse for things like forgetting their anniversary than Stan does for Francine. Bob is supportive, loving, and forgiving. Which is just amazing to watch. The times when his kids really need him, he’s there for them, and he helps them through their problems. While Bob might fight with and get mad with or annoyed by his family, Bob never treats them like people he’s stuck with. Frankly, Bob blows most animated TV dads out of the water. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Stan or Francine give quiet supportive talks to Steve or Hayley ever in American Dad. Peter used to at least try to be a decent father, but now is a negligent toddler. Likewise, Homer used to be a great father who cared about his kids, but later seasons have really stepped away from the family angle the Simpsons used to have. In a sea of adult animated families that are toxic and destructive, Bob’s genuine love for his family came as a breath of fresh air.

Linda Belcher

Linda is by far the best Adult Animation TV mom there is. For one thing, she’s funnier than Francine, Lois, and Marge combined. But more importantly, she’s not the butt of the joke when it happens. I can only really remember laughing at Francine when they make dumb blonde jokes with her, but Linda’s jokes come from her character. She could have easily been the gender inverted Homer or Peter, but the writers are careful to make her gullible, trusting, and goofy without making her a moron. When the kids do something wrong, Linda busts out the tough mom act and you genuinely believe that the kids are in trouble. She’s not faking it. She’s not off in her own little world. She’s a bit of a goofy dreamer, but she’s able to be the tough disciplinarian when she needs to be. Her relationship with Bob is also better than most adult animation wives. She’s more independent than the other housewives, and even though her job is working with her husband, it never feels like it robs Linda of her own power, autonomy, and freedom. But the best thing about Linda is that I think most people can agree, she has an extremely strong and charming personality that endears us to her.

Tina Belcher

I really wish I could say I liked Tina more. She’s a creative romantic, just like me. I should love her. But her monotone deliveries and awkwardness isn’t as endearing as Bob’s. I like her better in episodes like Teen-A Witch and Broadcast Wagstaff School News where she has a bit stronger of a personality. But unfortunately, Tina is my least favorite member of the Belcher family, which isn’t to say that I hate her, she just doesn’t shine as bright as the rest of her family. She’s just not very funny or interesting on her own. But on the plus side, at least I don’t find Tina to be annoying or terrible except in the rare bad episode.

Gene Belcher

Gene is the only member of the family that can regularly get my dad to laugh, and with good reason. If he wasn’t such a well of nonsequitor punchlines, Gene would probably be the worst member of the family, but boy howdy do those random jokes pick up the slack. Gene is genuinely hilarious, even if I’d only rank him above Tina in terms of favoritism. However, I find that most Gene-centric episodes to be lackluster or below average. I think Gene’s best episode is probably Y Tu Ga-Ga Tambien, but of the best episodes, none really come to mind that specifically star Gene. Gene is really better suited for a supporting role, and his times as the star showcase why comic reliefs aren’t the main character. They’re support characters for a reason. That’s not to say Gene-centric episodes are terrible. They just tend to range from about average to bad. Though Y Tu Ga-Ga Tambien is a pretty good one.

Louise Belcher

Bob and Linda saved the best for last because Louise is the breakout star of the show. Funny, interesting, and the focus of many of the better episodes, Louise stands proudly on the first place podium with Linda in 2nd and Bob taking 3rd place. I think Louise’s strengths are especially due to her standoffish and naughty personality, which has lent itself to a lot of good character growth episodes. Season 10 Louise seems a lot more mature than Season 1 Louise. I think Louise works because while she does often have clever or sneaky solutions to problems, they don’t forget that she’s 9, so unlike Stewie, her age does present hurdles and barriers to her schemes and plans.

The Best and Worst of Bob’s Burgers

#10 WORST: Pro-Tiki/Con-Tiki (S6e15)

Why couldn’t Warren Fitzgerald just put that $100,000 into advertisements or to help Bob buy better equipment for his restaurant? My biggest issue with this episode isn’t the episode itself, it’s that the ending makes no sense. Warren wants to help Bob because he has a form of riches Warren lacks, and Bob doesn’t want a corporate sponsor to make changes to his brand. But why can’t Warren just give Bob the money to make choices he wants to make? They could stay as business partners, but Bob doesn’t have to sacrifice his personal vision for the restaurant. It’s just really frustrating when they’re both being too stupid and stubborn to see the obvious solution in front of their faces.

#10 BEST: Teen-a Witch (S7e03)

One of Tina’s best episodes, as someone who had a goth phase myself and dabbled a tiny amount in ‘witchcraft’, this episode brings back memories of high school and the desire to make the world what I wanted it to be. But on top of that, Tina with a backbone is when she really shines as a character, mostly because it means her humor isn’t being derived from her being awkward.

#9 WORST: Live and Let Fly (S9e05)

Mr. Frond embarrasses the kids, and they team up with Up-Skirt Kurt to get revenge against his sister and Mr. Frond. I’m not a fan of Kurt, so I already don’t care much about his feud with his sister, but I also just find the episode kind of boring. I don’t care about Kurt, I don’t care about his feud, and the kids call off their revenge, so that ends up not mattering either. Even Bob and Linda’s side plot is only middle-of-the-road quality for Bob’s Burgers.

#9 BEST: Wharf Horse/World Wharf II (S4e21-22)

The very first two-part episode Bob’s Burgers ever had, the season 4 finale is a great watching experience. It has some fun songs, funny character exchanges, suspenseful drama, and some heartfelt moments. It feels like a short movie, and that’s a good thing for a two-part episode to do. Even Fanny and Felix are interesting villains. But even after everything Felix did, I don’t find myself loathing him in later episodes, and that’s a hard thing to accomplish.

#8 WORST: Tina-Rannosaurus Wrecks (S3e07)

This is the only bad Tina episode where the problem isn’t Tina herself. My biggest issue with this episode is more just the subject matter. Bob lies for insurance reasons about who was driving his car, and the entire episode is just Bob and Tina digging a deeper and deeper hole for themselves. The solution to the issue is clever enough to redeem the episode somewhat, but the majority of the watching experience is just kind of an awkward dance of watching these two getting tangled up in a web of lies.

#8 BEST: The Taking of Funtime One Two Three (S9e02)

Bar none, this is the single best ‘Heist’ episode of Bob’s Burgers, and it’s kind of crazy that Bob’s Burgers has actually built a repertoire to where I can make a list of ‘heist’ episodes as an archetype. This one feels the most like an actual heist movie, and the ending is legitimately clever and unexpected. But even more than that, if you’re paying attention, you can see the twist before the characters even reveal it. That is the kind of tight writing that makes the list for best episodes.

#7 WORST: A Fish Called Tina (S10e12)

Tina spends an episode trying way too hard to make someone like her, to the point that she almost humiliates a 4th grader in public just so she can live out some fantasy. It’s really uncomfortable and sickening to watch Tina do this. This will be a recurring issue with Tina’s low-point episodes. There’s nothing fun about watching a character make a complete idiot out of themselves by coming on too strong. It even makes me groan when Kaylie shows up in another Season 10 episode because I don’t want to have to think about this awful episode.

#7 BEST: Stand By Gene (S6e12)

Something about this episode really just brings back memories of my childhood. Memories of walking through the outdoors, just exploring and wanting to find things. The characters are funny, and Bob and Linda’s relationship is put to the test. Plus, I loved that for the entire episode, you don’t know how it’ll end. It really makes this a personal favorite and one of the episodes I knew had to make it on my list.

#6 WORST: The Grand Mama-Pest Hotel (S7e13)

Linda ruins things for Tina by being an overbearing annoyance. Are you noticing a trend with Bob’s Burgers’ worst episodes? I don’t like it when good characters make complete jackasses out of themselves in the name of ‘humor’. It’s not funny. It’s annoying and makes me dislike them. Thankfully, the worst of it is only in the latter half of the 2nd act and the entire third act, but Linda’s behavior just makes me cringe and ask why they had to do Linda dirty like this? It just puts me even more squarely on the side that Tina is entirely in the right and I don’t want to deal with Lind either.

#6 BEST: Broadcast Wagstaff School News (S3e12)

From Tina at her lowest point to Tina at her best, Broadcast Wagstaff School News is my favorite episode of the first 5 seasons. Tina’s funny and engaging, Gene is absolutely shining as Little Bob, and while Louise and Linda play supporting roles in this episode, they’re still funny as well. Plus, the mystery is a good one, and this episode is even referenced in later seasons.

#5 WORST: Mazel-Tina (S4e13)

Tina ruins Tammy’s birthday and steals her party. This is Tina at rock bottom. Tina is so despicable, cruel, and selfish in this episode that it reminds me that behind that creative awkward girl is a selfish brat who doesn’t care if she hurts other people if she can live out her fantasies. If other episodes didn’t rescue Tina from being so unlikable, I probably would hate Tina as a character entirely for her behavior in this episode.

#5 BEST: The Silence of the Louise (S8e02)

Movie parodies are some of the best, and The Silence of the Louise is the queen of all the movie parodies. When Mr. Frond’s therapy dolls are mutilated, and the school staff calls off the waterpark trip until the culprit is caught, Louise teams up with psycho Millie to figure out whodunnit. This is also one of the first time Millie wasn’t strictly an antagonist, and she genuinely felt like someone who could be Louise’s friend someday.

#4 WORST: Boywatch (S8e16)

Tina ruins things for other people by coming on too strong. The only reason this is ranked higher than Mozel-Tina is because in that episode, she just wanted to be at the party, and just kind of ended up as the star of the party and let it go to her head, whereas here, she is actively ruining things for other people in pursuit of her own delusions and fantasies. Tina has no desire to be a junior lifeguard, but cute boys causes her to behave like a troublemaker. She’s entirely out of character, and her teammates’ hate for her behavior is something I agree with. I don’t want to hate the main characters, so why does this show keep pushing to make Tina a nuisance who ruins experiences for other people?

#4 BEST: The Quirkducers (S7e06)

If the Silence of the Louise is the queen of film parodies, then The Quirkducers is the king. Not only is it a clever parody of The Producers, but it also has some damn good musical numbers, especially the edited end credit version. But it’s Tina’s song at the end that stands as one of my favorites of all Bob’s Burgers’ songs.

#3 WORST: Bed & Breakfast (S1e07)

If a Fish Called Tina is bad, then Bed & Breakfast is flaming garbage. Linda turns their apartment into a Bed and Breakfast, and Linda goes berserk when the guests don’t play into her expectations. This episode verges from below average to detestable as Linda goes insane and locks people in their rooms, and Louise drives a grown man to attack workers by preying on his fear. 

#3 BEST: The Hauntening (S6e03)

This is hands-down the best Halloween episode that Bob’s Burgers ever made. This show turns out some amazing holiday episodes, and this is one of the best the Belchers have to offer. I won’t dare give away anything about this episode. If you’ve seen it, you know why it’s top of the heap, and if you haven’t, then all I can say is what are you waiting for? Delayed gratification has to pay off eventually.

#2 WORST: Every Which Way But Goose (S9e14)

Tina falls in love with a goose. Who smoked crack before writing this episode, and who huffed enough paint thinner to approve this episode for production? This is the absolute dumbest concept for an episode I have ever come across. Who thought this was a good idea? I can’t even pinpoint the flaws because this entire episode is just so flawed. At least Mazel-Tina and Boywatch enrage me. This just baffles me.

#2 BEST: A Few Gurt Men (S7e11)

When Mr. Ambrose accuses Mr. Frond of stealing his yogurt from the faculty lounge, the case is brought before student court, and Louise is tasked with acting as Defense Council for Mr. Frond. One thing Bob’s Burgers does well is mysteries, and this is a good one as Louise has to figure out a way to prove Frond’s innocence. This is just an absolute personal favorite. Every character is just on point, and I get excited when the episode starts to que up.

#1 WORST: Moody Foodie (S2e07)

Did you ever want to watch the Belchers commit a felony? Then boy howdy do I have an episode for you! A picky food critic responsible for shutting down restaurants comes to Bob’s Burgers. Bob messes up the order, and a visit to the critic’s house to get him to try his burger again leads to a hostage situation with the critic tied to a chair and gagged in his own home. Words cannot describe the depth to which I hate this episode. The entire episode feels dirty and vile. I feel the need to scrub my skin raw after sitting through this episode. The instant I realize that it’s come on, I skip the the next one. I have literally only sat through this episode once. This episode disgusts me. This episode has the main character, abduct somebody in their own home. Then they take a second hostage when a mailman delivers the guy’s package. Luckily, Bob’s Burgers has a lot of good episodes to make up for this one bad egg, but this episode enrages me to the point that if the family wasn’t so charming and endearing most of the time, I might have stopped watching based just on this one episode.

#1 BEST: The Bleakening: Part 1 & 2 (S8e06-07)

The first time I saw these episodes, they played back to back without any credits in between them, and I thought it was one episode, and I didn’t even realize it was the length of two episodes. Between the amazing songs, the brain bending twists, the creative creature, the dark elements that contrast the bright lights of the holidays, and the uplifting ending, this pair of episodes stands paramount as the single greatest viewing experience that Bob’s Burgers has to offer.

Favorite Friend of the Kids: Regular-Sized Rudy

First appearing in Carpe Museum, Rudy came back in The Kids Rob a Train, where he has remained a friend of the kids since. Rudy was the first to join the kids if you don’t count Andy and Ollie who seem to dip in and back out as to whether they’re included in the friend group. Rudy was thus the first to be made a main member of the kids’ friend group.

Favorite Schoolyard Seven: Jocelyn

The Schoolyard Seven is the friend group of the three Belchers, Jimmy Jr., Zeke, Tammy, and Jocelyn. Not counting the Belchers, it was a close call between Zeke and Jocelyn. Tammy and Jimmy Jr. tend to be typecast as serving one niche thing, but Zeke and Jocelyn are often the comedic gold. However, while Zeke is more interesting of the two, I just enjoy Jocelyn too much to not give her the win. Even if Jocelyn’s humor is just a walking dumb blonde trope, like Gene, Jocelyn has a knack for funny one-liners. If the groups has another name, I’m not privy to it.

Favorite Friend of the Family: Micky

Though he’s less connected to the family now, Micky has been a friend to the Belchers since Bob Day Afternoon, and returning in Bob Fires the Kids. Since his introduction, Micky has gotten a job at Wonder Wharf, where he has remained since.

Favorite Recurring Villain: Logan Bush

First appearing in Ears-y Rider, Logan has been a fun and interesting frenemy for Louise to match wits with. In a show where most other villains are the same age as the main characters (Millie, Tammy, Chloe, Jimmy Pesto, Hugo) Logan stands out as a legitimate bully. Yet, even he was willing to work with Louise in Mother-Daughter Laser Razor, showing that there is wiggle room for the two of them to even join forces and spread havoc together.

Favorite Tina Love Interest: Duncan

Earnest if not a little awkward, Duncan seems like a sweet boy for Tina to possibly end up with. Sasha Whiteman is another character I could easily see being a good boyfriend to Tina because his quick wit and social graces make him a great foil to Tina, and he excels where Tina falls short. Zeke has a good chance to be a good boyfriend, but Tina still spits his name when she greets him, so I doubt she’d take interest in him unless something happens to change their dynamic. I liked Josh, but now that he’s said he doesn’t like her anymore and she agreed that she feels the same, I doubt we’re going to see them date further in the future.

Favorite Side Character: Nat Kinkle the Limo Driver

First appearing in Season 8 episode 8 V for Valentine-detta, I must not be the only fan of Nat’s because she made two appearances in the 10th season, in episode 1 The Ring (But Not Scary) and episode 17 Just the Trip. Currently with only 3 appearances, she’s still only a side character, but I get the feeling that like with Rudy, Courtney, Darrel and Alex before her, Nat will keep becoming a more frequent character. She just has a great vibe, and her charisma is intoxicating. She meshes great with the family, making her an absolute delight to watch.

Favorite Bit Character: Marshmallow

Although she’s appeared in multiple episodes since her introduction in Sheesh, Cab Bob, Marshmallow has never gotten much more than a couple lines, with her biggest role being in The Bleakening where she had more to say. She was also the first major LGBT+ recurring character on the show, which also made her a joy to see, whenever she returned to Bob’s Burgers.

Favorite Headcanon: Gene is Genderfluid

Gene’s jokes have been centered on his gender or sexuality since the first season finale. A joke once in a while is one thing, but ten years of the same sorts of jokes tells the sharp viewer that there’s more to it than just a running gag. With how many jokes have Gene talk about having boobs, synching his cycle, or calling himself Tina and Louise’s sister or Bob and Linda’s daughter, it’s my opinion that Gene is genderfluid, or possibly even transgender. The only reason I say genderfluid over a transgirl is because he still also addresses himself as a boy or a man as much as he does girl jokes.

Best Song: Twinkly Lights (Ms. XXX-Mas)

Not only does Toddrick Hall absolutely kill this performance, but I also love the meaning of the song about POC inclusivity and pride in the LGBT+ community. As the final song in The Bleakening, it’s one hell of a closing number, and I can’t help but dance in my seat whenever it plays. I’ve even listened to it independent from watching the show, and honor I don’t bestow on every song.

Best Episode Archetypes:

The Best Heist: The Taking of Funtime One Two Three

The Belcher kids have stolen a number of things. Chocolate, a bounce house, but the absolute creme de la creme of their heists is the procuring of the Dunebuggy from Family Funtime. When Family Funtime unplugs the macchines whenver the kids get too many tickets from them, the kids decide to pull off the heist of a century to make off with the biggest prize of the arcade: the dune buggy.

The Kids Tell An Anthology: Moms, Lies, and Videotapes

From the Gayle Tales to The Handyman Can, the kids have told a number of anthology stories, but the most impressive of the bunch is their stories of the mother’s day plays into three interesting stories. Though true to form, Gene’s is the weakest of the three, as his usually are. I don’t recall any time when his anthology was the best of the kids’, but then, Gene is not the most creative of the three children. His best story is probably in The Frond Files where his story’s world is colorful and fun to observe.

Best Musical Episode: The Bleakening

Not only do these episodes have a lot of musical numbers, but there is not a single one that doesn’t hit a home run. But more importantly, the entire episode is a musical, with each number helping to tie and bridge together the narrative, which is the entire purpose of musical numbers in a proper musical, which makes this the single best musical episode mainly because it’s the only episode that’s a true blue musical.

Best Holiday Episode: The Hauntening

With The Bleakening already taking the top spot for musical episodes, that leaves the Miss Congeniality of the holiday episodes to take the crown. I didn’t spoil anything about this episode above, and I won’t say a thing about it now. This episode is solid gold.

Best Film Parody: The Quirkducers

Not only is this episode clever in the way it uses its source material, but the family all have moments to shine despite the stars being Louise and Gene. The show also makes good use of the Schoolhouse Seven (the main group of the Belcher Kids, Jimmy and Zeke, and Tammy and Jocelyn), and each of them brings something great to the episode. It undoubtedly earned its place in the top 10, and will likely hold its place for years to come.

[imaginewithmgk]

Last night I had a dream that kells and I were on the gq couple thingy & it was fucking hilarious. I think he’d be a fun time on there. Is there any way I could request you do an imagine like that?? Please ! 🙏😇

GQ COUPLE’S QUIZ

request fourteen

summary: colson and his gf y/n do the gq couples quiz together

word count: 1,877

warnings: mention of nipsey hussle’s death

3rd person’s P.O.V.

Y/N sat down in the chair while her boyfriend sat beside her in a different chair.

“You ready?” He asks her and grabs her hand, knowing that she gets nervous when someone is filming her. Although she gets nervous, she knows that this kind of stuff comes with dating a celebrity. 

“Yeah, are you okay with doing this?” She asks Colson, knowing that he was upset earlier today because Nipsey did this interview with Lauren before he passed. The death had hit him really hard but doing this was a way to honour Nip’s legacy, as their GQ interview was really popular. 

“Yeah baby, let’s do this!” He smiles. 

“Okay guys, you know the drill. Y/N will ask Colson the questions off her cue cards and we will keep track of the points. We begin rolling in 3, 2, 1…”

“Hey everyone. I’m Y/N Y/L/N and I’m here with my boyfriend, Colson Baker a.k.a Machine Gun Kelly. This is the GQ Couples Quiz, hopefully, y’all know how it works. Are you ready baby?”

“Yeah let’s do it,” Colson smiles at her. 

“Alright, what was the first meal I ever cooked for you?” Y/N grins at him.

“God that was a long time ago,” He chuckles. “Are we talking when we were friends or when we started dating?”

“Hmm.. let’s go with friends to make it harder for you,” 

“Was it… cereal or something?”

“Babe!”

“What!?” 

“It was grilled cheese! When you were hungover and came to my place,” She playfully hits his shoulder. 

“Oh yeah! I knew that so I should still get the point,”

“No, you didn’t!” They laugh together.

“I’m going to be so bad at this,” He puts his head in his hand and laughs.

“Confidence is key,”

“Yeah baby I know,” They smile at each other. 

“Okay… how many tattoos do I have?” Colson looks up and furrows his eyebrows. 

“Let me imagine your body hold on,” He points his finger in the air as if to count. “1, 2, 3, 4, 5…”

“Come on,” Y/N encourages him.

“11?”

“Correct!” Y/N high fives him. “Bonus point if you can name them,”

“I don’t know about that,” Colson teases. Y/N playfully shakes her head at him.

“What’s my favourite colour?”

“Easy, green.” Colson pauses. “Or the colour of my eyes,” He winks.

“Correct, good job. Two points so far,”

“What was my first job ever?” 

“Fuck, it was at a fast-food joint right?” 

“Yes! Three points,”

“I’m smashing this!” Colson pumps his fist in the air. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Y/N giggles. 

“If I could only eat one thing for the rest of my life, what would it be?” Y/N nervously shuffles the cue cards.

“I don’t know if I can say that one on camera baby,” He laughs. 

“Kells!” She swats him with the cue cards and laughs. 

“Nah, Nah. Pasta right?” 

“Nice save. Correct,” 

“Alright, what’s something on my bucket list?” 

“Ummm… go to the Olympics? Like attend it, not be in it!” 

“Yes actually, I’m surprised you know that one.”

“You gotta give me more credit, I listen…” He pauses. “Sometimes,” Colson joking around is noticeably making her feel more comfortable. 

“How do you know when I’m mad at you?”

“How am I supposed to answer this without making you mad?” Colson teases. “You ignore me, gimme the cold shoulder,”

“I mean you’re not wrong…” She admits. “What colour are my eyes?” Y/N shuts her eyes quickly. 

“Damn, now I can’t cheat. They’re green yeah?”

“No! They’re brown!” She says as she opens her eyes.

“With little green bits in them!”

“Babe! They do but they’re mostly brown. I reckon that one’s wrong.”

“Not fair,” Colson jokingly pouts. 

“Let’s move on. What’s my favourite “pump up” song?”

“Till I Die by yours truly,” Colson grins. “Obviously. How many points am I on now?”

“7 I think?”

“Out of how many questions?”

“9?”

“Alright, I’m doing okay so far,” 

“What’s my favourite movie?”

“Notting Hill!” Colson answers quickly.

“Wow, I’m impressed.”

“Yeah well, you make me watch it at least three times a week,” 

“True,” She giggles. 

“How long does it take to my makeup?”

“Well, it depends on the look, pretty much between 5 hours to 3 years!” Colson jokes.

“Hey! It does not take me that long. It takes me life half an hour to an hour!”

“Yeah well for me it feels like a lot longer than that,” He laughs. 

“What’s my favourite fast food and what do I like to order?” 

“Oh, easy, your favourite place is KFC and you like to order a double tender meal! That’s an Australian specific burger for all you uncultured swine,” He jokes. 

“Correct!” Y/N laughs. “Who influenced me when I was growing up? Music-wise,” Y/N asks cheekily. Colson rolls his eyes. 

“Eminem,” He mumbles. 

“What was that?” Y/N giggles.

“Eminem!” He speaks a bit louder which makes Y/N burst into laughter. God knows if these two will have any laughter left in their body after this interview is finished. 

“Correct again. You’re rocking this baby,” 

“What am I on now?”

“Like ten I think?”

“Sick!”

“Describe me in three words,” 

“Gotta make this appropriate. Let’s go with sexy, funny, no actually! Hilarious! And kind,”

“Awe thanks, Kells!” 

“What am I most comfortable sleeping in?”

“Nothing,” Colson winks at the camera. 

“Oh my god,” Y/N puts her face in her hand. “Let’s move on.”

“Wait wait wait is that correct?” He smirks.

“Yes! Now, what am I most scared of?”

“Small spaces right? You’re claustrophobic or whatever they call it,”

“Yes and no. I am scared of small spaces but it’s not what I’m most scared of,”

“What is it then?”

“I’m most scared of losing you,” Y/N blushes.

“Awe babe! I love you,” Colson kisses her cheek. 

“I love you too,” She smiles. “What’s my Starbucks order?”

“Either cold brew or a green tea frap with whipped cream,”

“Correct! I think that’s 13 now?”

“Yay!”

“Who’s my favourite actor/actress?”

“Obviously me, or Hugh Grant,”

“Another one correct!”

“Where was I born?”

“Easy, Australia!”

“Do you know where in Australia?”

“Melbourne?”

“Yep! I knew that you knew that, I just love hearing you say Melbourne in your accent,” Y/N admits, to which Colson laughs. 

“Who is my celebrity crush?”

“Is that even a question? It’s obviously me,”

“Yes… obviously…” Y/N says in an uncertain voice.

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” Colson furrows his eyebrows. 

“Nope!” Y/N laughs. “Moving on… what is my favourite nickname to call you?”

“Daddy,” Colson winks at the camera.

“Colson!” Y/N raises her voice, clearly embarrassed. 

“Or Kells,” 

“That’s better,” They laugh together. “Who is Casie’s favourite? If you don’t know, Casie is Colson’s beautiful daughter,”

“Um me of course,”

“No, me!”

“Hey! I’m better with her!”

“No, she loves me more,”

“No, she loves ME more! I’m her dad!” Colson whines. 

“There’s only one way to settle this,” Y/N grins and grabs her phone out of her jacket pocket. She clicks on Casie’s facetime contact and moves the phone to show only her face.

“Hey Y/N!” Casie answers.

“Hey baby girl, I have a question for you.”

“What’s up?”

“I wanna know who’s your favourite, me or your dad?”

“Is dad with you?”

“No…” Y/N chuckles.

“Okay don’t tell him but you’re my favourite!”

“Hey!” Colson yells. 

“Y/N you said he wasn’t with you!” Casie pouts.

“Sorry hun, we’re doing a video and he thought that he was your favourite,”

“You’re both my favourite!”

“You can’t go back on your word now,” Y/N jokes. “I gotta go now but I’ll see you soon!”

“Okay love you both!”

“Love you too!” Colson and Y/N say at the same time before Casie hangs up. 

“Told you I’m her favourite,” Y/N winks as Colson sits in his chair sulking.

“What’s my favourite tv show?”

“Depends on your mood. I know your top three are Law & Order SVU, Supernatural and Big Mouth,”

“Good one baby!”

“I only know that because you also make me watch those with you,”

“Shh you’re on 18 now I think,”

“Out of?”

“23 I believe,”

“Hmm, that’s okay,”

“Where did we first meet and what did I think of you?”

“We met at one of my shows and you thought I was an asshole,” Colson chuckles.

“I did think you were asshole but really hot,” Y/N admits.

“Great,” Colson laughs. 

“What’s my favourite ice cream flavour?”

“Mint choc chip!”

“No, it’s cookies and cream. You know better,” Y/N jokes. 

“Oops,”

“Okay, what’s my zodiac sign?”

“Oh! Virgo! And I’m a Taurus! I only know this because Y/N is trying to educate me on all of the signs,” He laughs. 

“Yes I am, he’s doing very well so far. Clearly,”

“I try,” He swats his imaginary hair behind his shoulder making everyone in the studio laugh. 

“What’s my favourite part of my body?”

“Coincidently, it is also my favourite part of your body. Your butt!”

“Yes,” Y/N says in between chuckles. 

“What’s my favourite song of yours?”

“That’s hard because you have so many!” Colson laughs.

“It’s true… how about name one off each of your albums?”

“Alright, I’ll just do the mainstream ones. Lace Up, your favourite is Wild Boy or See My Tears. General Admission, your favourite is Bad Motherfucker or Merry Go Round or Till I die! Honestly most of the songs off that album. Bloom, Let You Go or 27 or Wake + Bake cause you said my voice sounds really hot in that,”

“Don’t at me like that!” She laughs. “But it’s true,” She winks at the camera. 

“I know BINGE is an EP but still, your favourite is NYLON. Hotel Diablo, it’s Glass House or 5:3666 or el Diablo. And off Tickets to my Downfall, well that’s a secret.”

“Wow, you got all of them right! I really love Baddest and Lead You On too by the way! Highly recommend checking out all of those songs,”

“I’m glad you like my songs baby,”

“Of course. Now, what’s my favourite thing about you?”

“Physically, one thing we can’t mention on camera,” He winks. “Or my tattoos. Y/N has a really bad habit of tracing them like 24/7,”

“I can’t help it! They’re all so interesting. I think I’ve bugged him about telling me the meaning of every single one,” 

“True that. I reckon emotionally though, your favourite thing is how much I care about everyone,”

“Oh yeah for sure. Onto the last question, you ready babe?”

“Yep,”

“What’s the biggest scar on my body?”

“I don’t know babe! The one on your leg?”

“Yes actually,”

“Aye there we go!”

“Well, that was my last question, thanks for playing baby and thank you for watching!”

“What was my score?”

“24 out of 30 I think,”

“Oh,” Colson looks down at his feet. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy with that but that’s the score Nip got when he did this with Lauren. Shout out to those two, rest in peace. Neighbourhood Nip forever!”

“Love you,”

“Love you too baby girl,”

-

I did not check over this so sorry for mistakes lmao

tagged: @2dead2function @s-j-g-x @bakerkells @mayaslifeinabox @onlybadthingz @PumpkinQueenest19 @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @Feeding-into-darkness @xxkellsvixen19xx @lovemythsworld @xwhitewalkerx @deanwinchesterswife121 @jindongdongie​ @itjustkindahappenedreally​ @machine-gun-colson​

link to be tagged in future posts

[dipplie]

Temporary list of my stories and OC’s until one day I make a comprehensive and well made list:

Blinded:

Polli: My oldest OC and fun fact was my persona till she become edgy and I wasn’t 12 anymore. Everyone’s favorite yes yes I’m aware. Yellow, energetic, eats dirt and bugs, I can’t tell if she’s evil because of a wisp possession or just crazy. Breaks the 4th wall. Is she a Mary Sue???????? Who knows.

Melody: NOT Polli’s girlfriend despite Polli’s delousions. Has an abusive mom :(. Only has one eye and then no eyes and then robot eyes or smthn idk she becomes a badass when she gets older. But otherwise trembling in her shoes all the time.

Melodys Mom/Sharren: Bitch. Okay well all I’ll say is she’s old and grumpy and probably smells bad.

Louise: Total hotty, rich kid, FtM, got bullied as a kid for his weight. Had a squad of fans basically in high school. Lived with his mom after his parents got a divorce but his mom was semi abusive, projected her femininity onto him, and wouldn’t have been supportive of his transition, so between middle and high school he went to live with his dad and got his sex change and testosterone. His best friend in elementary and middle school stopped talking to him after his transition, and became his competition for the most attractive and sought after boy in school (except Louise is a sweetheart while his friend Tommy is a dick and really gross) His dad runs a company that specializes in technology, and after meeting and falling in love with Melody (even after all her abusive trauma and losing both her eyes) he has his dad and some of the developers create a way to get her vision back and I mean honestly I love him how could you not love him he’s so perfect.

Watching:

Fick: Big nerd boy with thick glasses. I feel like he’d use Reddit but don’t quote me on that. Big crush on Vivinya. Boy don’t wander into the woods- oh look dead body with a curse on it don’t touch it- aaaand now he has a wisp that makes him kill people, way to go kid. Panic attack central.

Vivinya: True crime girl, yucky yucky. Probably had a knife collection. “uwu I’m insane” except she actually is and starts using Fick to kill people for her and treats him like her “Yandere boyfriend” or something cringe and gross oh god. She deserves jail. JAIL. Needs to learn guys need to give consent too. Just overall sucks 1/10.

Tommy: I mentioned him early to be Louises ex best friend and rival. He used to have a crush on Louise actually but that don’t excuse being a BITCH!!!! Also needs to learn people gotta give consent he is just as gross as Vivinya. Cheats on all the girls he gets with because he’s again, a bitch. Idk if he deserved to get murdered though I mean he was still a teenager but it’s fine. Thinks of the song Seventeen from Heathers actually this story does feel a tad reminiscent of heathers with vivinya being a crazy and wanting to off a bunch of students. Huh.

Suzannie: Tommy’s older sister who’s a detective. What a coincidence. Monotone and depressed. Probably because her little brother got murdered. Gets real awkward when she’s talking about her brothers murder(s) to Fick and Vivinya like “when I find who did this to him they’ll regret being born”. Kind of really pretty actually.

Adolescents (there isn’t actually a story here yet but don’t worry about it shhhh):

Nelson: HIMBO HIMBO H- Jock stupid idiot big dork god he’s so awkward and his main personality trait is having a crush on Naomi and being a dork when talking to her. Probably could benchpress you.

Naomi: Gamer or something and a nerd geek. Her main personality trait is having a crush on Nelson and also being a dork when talking to him. Probably a weeb and fandom dweller. Can’t draw but she commissions artists to draw. She does write copious amounts of fanfiction though.

Andrés: Ohhh the school bad boy babyyyy. Baseball bat with nails in it or something. There’s like... A thing between him in Charlotte and he wants to be a thing but she’s being difficult and makes it hard to talk to her or about her and ugh.

Charlotte: Princess, high school princess. She’s actually pretty nice when you get to know her- but she’s a diva. Ballerina after school. Best friends with Naomi and doesn’t know what she’s talking about when she mentions ships or OTPs but she listens anyways because she’s a good friend. There’s like... A thing between her and Andrés but she doesn’t know if she’s super into him but geez he’s really hot but she gets such mixed responses when she asks her friends about it and what if it doesn’t work outttt.

Marlon: They/Them but they’re okay with either pronouns they aren’t sure yet, he or she is okay... Box boy box boy. Autism... He doesn’t want to admit He’s attracted to men but he’s totally attracted to men. He lives alone which is probably illegal for his age but somehow he manages. Everyone thinks he’s “the quiet kid” and he’s really sad about it no don’t make jokes like that please guys ahh-

Sing for Me:

Kat: The color pink, addahadda(adhd), angry and loud and short. For being only like 10 and being an adorable little lesbian dressing in sparkly pink dresses she actually likes screaming a lot and would totally sing heavy metal if her producers let her. Loud and mad but gets so soft around her girlfriend. “If anything happens to Brie I’m killing everyone in this room and then myself”.

Brie: French... Birds and stuff. Loves her girlfriend even though she is so loud. So fast. So much. Likes to write pretty things. Is only like an inch taller than Kat. Filled with so much love for everything.

Elliot: The girls manager. Lots of coffee. Stressed out of his MIND please help this man. Probably gay. Seems like a smug dick but he is just a tall and lanky dork that loves puppies and wants nothing more than for Kat and Brie to be happy. Accidentally brands them as sisters and then Kat kisses Brie and- oh fuck oh shit oh no what has he done. Hides the fan and non fan responses from them. Poor guy.

Horror Hosts:

Ichabod: Hot demon who’s the son of the current ruler of hell or something. I mean he’s hot, smart, and royalty, what more do you want. I very specifically hear the dub voice of Kyoya Ootori from OHHC as his voice don’t @ me. Goat legs????? Yeah??? Don’t be rude.

Barnabie: Ohhhhhhhhh big orc teddy bear I’m crying I love him????? He puts up a more confident ploy and the given stereotypical personality orcs supposedly have but he’s just a shy boy that wants to give girls flowers and call boys pretty. Help him.

Garrison: Gary Burger. Fat hairy gay man. I mean werewolf. Wouldn’t it be funny if I made the whole werewolf thing backwards and made him transform into a HUMAN only on the full moon??? Party animal, pun absolutely intended. LOUD AND FUNNY he’s a dork. Bites. Horny on main Garrison please you’re supposed pamper and flirt with the guests but not quite that much.

Vincenzo: Token Vampire but he’s Italian because I felt like it. Talk and lanky of course. Bitch face. Blood coffee? Yeah lots of coffee. Tired. Let him sleep in Ichabod. Steps on people. Can summon and reanimate corpses but has a bitter attitude towards them because they get annoyed with him as much as he gets annoyed with- everyone else. He does have a soft spot but idk where it is. When he’s talking to guests he’s more suave and sexy though.

Kai: Genderfluid haha get it because slime fluid-... I’ll stop. Probably objectively the hottest because they can look anyway they want and shift their vocals to sound like almost anything, also probably objectively the best in bed (if you’re okay with the texture of Jell-o) and honestly come on save some for the rest of us it’s not fair. This boy can SING oh my god seranade me and whisper in my ear baby. Spunky and sassy.

Hallvor: BABY OCTOPOD BOY OHHHHH I LOVE HIM HE’S SO SWEET AND IS AN ANGEL DARLING BOY SO EMBARRASSED SO SHY SOFTEST VOICE OHHH- ohhh nooo he’s got a knife ohhhhh Hallvor baby don’t be like that ohhhh... Used to work in hentai actually (I wonder why) but quit because of immoral practices and good for him we love that. Okay he’s not actually a yandere or whatever but he DEFINITELY wants to squeeze you a little too hard and has those crazy eyes.

Carla: Main character of this OHHC monster clone. She sucks I don’t like her because listen listen she kills monsters as a living and when she tries to kill our boys here, Ichabod catches her and goes “no” but then the rest (not knowing her murderous intent) fall in love with her and Ichabod is like: “shoot well I’ll keep you alive and around but I’m watching you” and blah blah romance and feelings and character development and wow she seems like she’s grown to care about them... So Ichabod removes a curse he put to prevent her from harming them or leaving... AND THEN SHE STABS THEM ALL IN THE BACK IM CRYING. I mean she might have an extra reason for needing to kill them but I haven’t decided if I want to actually put it in the story yet so.

Fingertips:

Maria/Marianna: Was this goth angry chick and the head of these losers but after a failed heist, fire, and being betrayed and dropped from a window on a 3rd or 4th story down into flames, and going to the hospital and changing her name, she changed totally and become a soft pretty girl... And then the next three boys went “HEY BOSS WE FOUND YOU” and she went “oh no” and now she’s just an anxious wreck like “no no no no no I don’t shoot people in the face anymore no no no no no” And has a fear of hands. Also was Diamontés best friend in primary school and yes all these characters went to the K-12 school all the other characters do/did. Pretty voice. The story is mostly about her being anxious around all the other characters because who was it that betrayed her and dropped her into the flames below? Find out next week on th-

Nikki: He’s that character that you see and immediately go “oh he’s gross and is angry and is a bitch” and you’re right he is and has a cockney accent and screams a lot and probably swings a knife around a lot, but he’s got a sweet interior (somewhere in there... somewhere) Screamo heavy metal. Him and the rest of these character briefly talked about having a band and then they didn’t and then at the end of the story they do and although he plays guitar mostly, if he does do lead vocals he screams a lot. Bitch.

Anthony: Pretty boy but like the “was in the army” pretty boy vibe. Probably played football in highschool. Pyromaniac. Punches Nikki a lot. Almost gives himbo vibes sometimes, almost. Kind of likes the old timey cozy aesthetic. Plays the piano sometimes but “oh I’m not very good at it” Plays extremely well

Diamonté: TALL. Purple goth boy aesthetic hellll yeahhhh. CRAZY EYES AND THEY SPEAK VOLUMES WATCH OUT. Drums. The scary kind of quiet because he just smiles at you. Crowbar. Okay but he’s actually really sweet though. Secretly loves watching Anthony and Nikki get into fights so that’s why he rarely puts a stop to it. I think he’s a sadist. Can be a gentle giant, but can also be a not so gentle giant. The only time he’s really talkative is after copious amounts of booze.

Unnamed/Undesigned 1: Literally a pimp and he’s pretty gross. Blonde hair and pink and white clothes.

Unnamed/Undesigned 2: Chick that likes to throw knives and be angry and threatens Marianna a lot but in a quiet and monotone way, Marianna is pretty scared and hopes that these are just shallow threats uhhhhh.

Unnamed/Undesigned 3: Sells guns (without a lisence of course) and wears a bandana over his face a lot. Tired. Grumpy.

Unnamed/Undesigned 4: Like Marianna, was cold hearted and cool but then got caught in the fire and got all soft. He only has one eyes but how sweet his eyepatch is a heart. Recoved along side Marianna and they are good friends good friends tha- wait Marianna are you going back with them oh god you can’t do that oh dear oh no oh-

(I don’t have a story or name for these two but they’re my comfort ship OC’s and my current hyper fixaction right now):

Rodriquéz: I literally designed him with almost all the traits I find attractive in a guy other than freckles so as you can imagine I find him super HOT. I also designed his personality on what I find attractive from a guy so as you can imagine I find him super GREAT. But anyways he’s grumpy and closed off and monotone and smug. I really could go on for hours about how I want him to step on me I’m so sorry guys. Both him and Samantha give the “21 and having immature fun” vibes. They’re a thing but they like going to bars together and splitting off and doing their own thing (or doing someone else’s thing if you get what I mean haHhahHhahGahGhaha-) But so help them if anyone doesn’t oblige by the “no” from one of these two, someone’s gonna get beat up.

Samantha: (She literally just my personality shhhhh don’t tell anyone it’s a secret) Bubbly, energetic, a little shy by extroverted, bombshell blonde or something? It took me way too much time and effort to design her but I’m really happy with how I finally designed her, I love her outfit. She could kick me in the face and I’d say thank you. Girly drinks at the bar. Got that trauma and anxiety™️ secretly though. Skips and jumps a lot. As I’m typing this I keep looking up at the drawing of her and more and more I would want her to also step on me.

(Space Story I don’t have a nice title for):

Unnamed/Undesigned 1: So... Funny story this story originally was with me and uh... My ex I guess... So I gotta replace the MC’s... Whoops ahaha... Awkward. But anyways the MC is a robot and a girl and is a slight tsundere or smthn.

Unamed/Undesigned 2: Has a space ship, works for this organization in space that protects the galaxy. Is cocky, lazy, sly, oblivious, and an idiot. The love interest- obviously. Probably accidentally committing space crimes. (Like space pirating hAHAHA-) Kind of cool when he wants to be.

Dandelion/Dandy: CAT. WITH A JET PACK. Kind of an asshole. Fun fact used to be Polli’s cat but then when the Second MC crash landed on earth she was like “fuck this noise I’m going with space boy laterz” (okay she can’t talk but she thought it).

Zizii: Lesbian alien? Yeah???? Okay but I mean her main character trait is being a dorky back alley doctor and engineer obsessed with the MC because they’re a sentient robot with emotions and a lazer arm and rocket boots WOW!!!!!!!!

Story I want to revive:

So I had a story I started writing a long time ago about this tech theatre kid that had a crush on this other theatre kid character, but in a play that other character has to kiss another person for the show, and as the story progresses the MC convinces themselves that it isn’t just a play and that their crush actually loves and is kissing that other kid. And in the play, that other character is supposed to die. Show night comes along and they die, but like actually, and by the hands of the MC (Idk maybe like a light falls on em or smthn). So it’s a grotesque scene the audience sees as just an act. (Mutters I dunno I think my idea’s cool...) So I’ve been wanting to design these characters and work more on the story but I’m busy being obsessed with Rodriquez and Samantha so. (And the Horror Host Club too I love them too still).

Other Characters that either don’t have a specific story or are kind of like background characters:

Jacqueiliquinne Merril: Sara Berry vibes from 35mm (go look up The Ballad of Sara Berry, maybe like an animatic idk the first one that comes up is nice) But otherwise rich, pretty, popular, bitch. Tries to like, steal Louise from his squad and it’s like bro that’s unnecessary who hurt you that’s so rude. She gives Nui from Kill La Kill Vibes too. Oh she knows her name is long and annoying but you have to say the whole thing.

Brianna: Jaqueiliquinne’s sister. Big titty goth gf??? She’s pretty popular too and kind of a bitch too but to a much lesser degree. Her and he sister throw hands a lot when no one is around, you know, “THEY GIRLS ARE FIGHTINNGGGG”.

The Louise Fan Club: 4 characters I haven’t named yet. One writes fanfiction of Louise and shares it with the others and with him sometimes and although he thinks it’s a bit weird he also finds it a tad endearing and supports her. One is an aspiring photographer and is constantly asking Louise to model for him. One is an artist and draws Louise all the time. And one is an aspiring musician who writes songs based of Louise’s relationships which again he finds a little weird but endearing and supports her.

The Jacquiliquinne Merril Fan Club: Genderbent-ish (I say ish because one of the characters is a little bit less defined gender wise) versions of the Louise Fan Club. Yes I’m lazy, and no they don’t get along with them, infact they hate each others club with a passion. 

Unnamed/Undesigned: I wanna make some hacker kid just because I wanna have one.

Unnamed/Undesigned: I also really wanna have a super cutesy magical girl and then a really super duper generic boring character probably like star vs the forces of evil idk I never watched that show but it looks cute.

Me: I exist in the universe fukc you I can do what I want it’s my story and I get to chose the who also if you wanna be in the mess of a universe go ahead draw yourself with my OC’s I allow and encourage and appreciate it. I literally made the Horror Host Club as a sort of Harem story and you are absolutely allowed to make out with them if you’re a monster fucker DO it GO ahead it’s canon.

and that is ALL I have FOR now Knowing me I’ll make like 12 more characters by July, and I mean I need more characters for the high school anyways so...

[sourw0lf]

Making Home

Summary: The Winchesters take you in after the death of your family. Dean invades your nest on accident, and Sam yells at him and then comforts you in his own way…

Relationship: Sam Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 4000+

Tags: Angst, Abo Dynamics, Omega!Reader, Alpha!Sam, Nesting, Fluff, Pre-Heat

You met the Winchesters after the death of your family.

They were disguised as FBI agents, asking too specific questions that you yourself had been taught and memorized long ago.

“It’s dead, you know,” you couldn’t help but blurt out to them the minute they began questioning you. They were obviously hunters and you weren’t going to waste their time.

Confusion and intrigue filled their eyes and their scents when you said that, but Sam had been the first to bite.

“What’s dead?” He asked.

You rolled your eyes, “The werewolf, you know? The one that killed my entire family?”

“How-” Dean started to question but you interrupted him.

“My father was a hunter for twenty years. You guys are asking some very obvious questions, you’re dressed in cheap suits, and you’re badges are fake.”

Awkward silence.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong. Whoever made those did a very good job, but they’re still fake.”

The older hunter smiled, either amused at your bluntness or happy with his badge work.

“Uh, really, is-” Sam coughed awkwardly, not knowing what to say.

“Did you kill it?” Dean interrupted Sam.

“Yes.” You replied, tired of the questions.

It had been a long couple of days in that motel room. Empty bottles of Jameson littered the floor and the room reeked of depressed omega, a smell so potent that the men in front of you had no doubt smelled it when you first opened the door. The bed behind you was covered in random shirts and blankets, a makeshift nest you had been wallowing in for days.

“Awesome. Well, I guess our work here is done then.” Dean put his hand out for you to shake, “Dean Winchester, a pleasure.”

Sam smacked his hand away and lectured him quietly, something about insensitive and her family just died.

But you didn’t care what he was saying and you could barely pay attention to it because that name. Winchester. You knew it.

“You’re fucking kidding me,” you barked.

Sam looked at you, sympathetic, “I’m sorry he’s such a dic-”

“You’re the Winchester brothers?” You demanded an answer.

They gave eachother a look and Dean’s hands disapeard behind him.

“Do you know where I can find Bobby?” 

Dean let go of his gun, hands moving to his sides once again. “I’m his niece. We haven’t seen him in years but when I was a kid.. my dad always told me to find him if something went wrong. If he was killed...”

Sam smelled worried, Dean smelled angry. Both scents hit you in the face, making you shift uncomfortably.

“He’s dean, isn’t he?”

They nodded and your heart dropped. You eyed the half-empty green bottle on the nightstand, willing yourself to feel nothing so your scent wouldn’t stink up the room anymore than it already had in their presence.

You knew Sam caught the glance, the next thing out of his mouth only confirmed it. 

“Maybe you should stay with us for a little while,” the younger Winchester asked, or more like pleaded.

Dean gave him the what the fuck?? look but didn’t argue.

You laughed, “You, uh, you don’t want me staying with you. Not right now,” you gestured to the mess of the room surrounding you.

“It’s fine, Dean’s the messiest person I know and I manage,” Sam immediately argued. 

“And I drink a lot.” They laughed at that, each muttering something along the lines of yeah, me too. “No, I mean a lot.” You pointed out the empty fifths littering the floor. They seemed to catch on.

“I’ll drink with you,” Dean assured you in a more comforting tone. “Come on, let’s get out of here, kiddo.”

---

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since the Winchesters had taken you in. The bunker was nice enough, comfortable. It made you feel safe, safer than you had ever felt in your life and a hell of a lot safer than you were used to. 

Sam and Dean had been nice, nicer than you deserved. And Dean kept that promise on drinking with you. 

Currently, though, the reality that you had absolutely no family left was feeling particularly hard today. Everything felt empty and pointless, and you begged yourself for escape from the constant depression.

So you did what you knew would help at least a little bit: building a nest.

You had been eyeing the small closet since the first day, contemplating. Normally you wouldn’t have hesitated making it, but the extra two alphas in your presence made it hard. What if they found the nest? How were you supposed to explain that to them? Oh, hey, sorry I marked the shit out of your closet and made the entire room smell like depressed, dying omega. Shit, my bad.

You thanked god himself for the existence of scent blockers. Without them, surely the boys would have kicked you out by now. You would have stunk up the entire bunker.

Sighing, you grabbed the blankets off your bed and headed for the closet.

---

“Hey, Y/n! I made burgers, you want one?” Dean walked up to your door, speaking loudly from the other side.

No answer.

“Y/n?” He asked again. “If you’re naked you gotta tell me now because I’m coming in,” he added after a few long moments.

He walked into the room hesitantly, looking down to avoid the possibility of you being naked. Still, no sign of you. In fact, the room was practically spotless. The blankets and pillows on your bed were gone and there were no empty bottle of whiskey like he would have expected. He spotted a couple dozen empty boxes of scent blockers in the trash next to your bed but you weren’t in sight.

“Y/n?” He asked again, growing concerned.

A shuffle was heard from the closet and Dean immediately whipped out his gun from where it stuck in the back of his jeans. He stared at the door, cautious, and then opened it slowly, the gun still pointed directly in front of him.

“Y/n?” He put it away as soon as he realized and knelt down to you.

You jumped back, dodging Dean’s hand when he reached out to you. You were surrounded by fluffy, white blankets and random articles of clothing. Underneath the strong, distressed omega scent was the smell of unfamiliar people. Most definitely an alpha and possibly another omega. The smell was faint but it was there and Dean could only guess you deceased family’s scent was buried in the nest somewhere.

“Hey,” he said softly, covering his nose with one hand to try and help with the smell. It was no use, though, the alpha in him was reacting to the prominent depressed omega scent. Without meaning to, he gagged. “What’s wrong, Y/n?”

“N-Nothing, I’m good,” you replied. Your voice was shaky and your body quivered to match it. You looked down at his hand, resting in the blankets of your nest. The idea of an alpha, even Dean, touching your nest made you uncomfortable.

He pulled his hand away and stared at you, “I lie professionally and I know when people are lying to me, Y/n. You are not okay.”

Tears formed in your eyes, “I’m sorry. I just- I nest when I’m nervous and I don’t know what’s wrong with me today. I-I’m sorry-”

“Woah, Y/n, hey, it’s fine,” Dean said quickly. His eyes grew wide when you started to sob, “I- fuck. Do you want me to get Sam? I feel like he would be better at-”

“What?”

“No, you’re right I’m making this worse, aren’t I? Do you want me to leave? Should I leave?” He searched for some way to help.

“Please,” you agreed quickly.

“Okay.” Much to your relief he stood up and left the room.

---

“Sam!” Dean yelled as he walked into his brother’s room unannounced.

“Jesus, Dean! What?” Sam glared at his brother, demanding a reason for the sudden unwanted intrusion.

“Dude, something is seriously up with Y/n.”

“And what makes you say that, Dean? Did she eat your pie or something because you didn’t actually inform her of your rul-”

“No, I’m saying this because I just found her wallowing in her closet, buried in a nest that reeks of her dead family members,” Dean barked back. He was still uneasy and stressed from the unfortunate interaction.

“You what?” Sam stood up from his bed, now intrigued with Dean’s worry.

“I was looking for her because I made food and went to see if she wanted some and I walked into her room - yes, I did knock, and yell to see if she was in there before walking in - and all the shit of her bed was gone, the room is clean. I heard movement in the closet, got worried and pulled my gun out but when I opened it up, she was there, in the dark, crying.”

“You pulled a gun on her in her nest?!” Sam suddenly asked incredulously. “Dean!”

“I didn’t know she was in there!” Dean defended himself.

“Oh my god, Dean!”

“What?!”

“Do you know nothing about omegas?” Sam scolded, obviously angry.

“Not all of us took special classes about omega rights in a freaking ivy league college, Sam. What the hell did I do? What wrong?”

“Yeah, it was omega rights. Not anatomy you fucking moron! You’re supposed to learn that stuff in school and like- in life! How have you been with this many omegas and know nothing?” Sam threw a t-shirt on, having previously just been laying in bed reading a book. Dean glared at him. ���Omegas make nests to feel safe and content. Her entire family is dead. Her father, uncle, and sister were just killed, in front of her, all in one day. It hasn’t even been a month since then, of course she’s nesting! She was just pulled from everything she knew into a strange place with two strange new alphas constantly around.”

“I’m still not seeing why you’re mad at me,” Dean deadpanned.

“Because that nest is probably the only place where she felt even remotely safe this entire time and you just pulled a gun on her. A random alpha intruding her nest would be enough to compromise it, but on top of that you pulled a gun on her! How do you think she feels right about now?”

Dean sighed, “Fuck.”

“Yeah. Fuck.” Sam agreed, pacing anxiously as he continued to scold his brother.

“What do we do?” Dean asked.

“We can’t do anything but wait until she comes out of her room.”

---

Four Hours Later

You walked out of your room in a new pair of clothes and covered in scent blockers. You headed straight for the showers, needing to be as odorless as possible before confronting the alphas after that embarrassing encounter earlier today.

You put music on as loud as it would go and got into the shower, sighing as the hot water hit your back. Desperate to as much of that depressed scent off of you, you grabbed your new scent blocking shower gel and scrubbed it all over you.

You had a plan: Scent blocking body wash, shampoo your hair, condition, shave legs, more body was. You wanted to get in and out quick so you could get something to eat because apparently sitting in that closet for some reason made you extremely hungry.

So you had a plan.

---

“Oh, fuck,” an involuntary moan was pulled loudly from your lips, your head falling back against the tiles of the shower wall. You hand was moving furiously against your clit, pleasure coursing through you as you balanced on the edge of orgasm.

This was not your plan.

“Oh my god, fuck,” one of your hands cupped against a breast, the other working hard to get you off. Your head was cloudy with lust and your were positively desperate to reach orgasm already.

You tried to picture something, anything that would push you over the edge. Your mind pictured a big, fat knot, connected to a hot alpha body. The alpha was naked, abs protruding and tanned all over. You imagined his mouth, his growl.

You were so close, legs shaking, letting out desperate please. You continued to pictured him, him moving his hand against his length, fingers gripping a half-formed knot. You could picture his mouth hot against yours, teeth scraping against your neck. Hair, brown and long, scratching you chin as he continued to kiss down your body.

Brown and long hair. Sam’s face connected to the imaginary alpha’s body. Sam. Why were you picturing Sam?

Whatever the reason, it pushed you over the edge and into one of the most satisfying orgasms you’ve had in a while.

“Fuck, oh fuck,” you rode out your climax, easing the pressure and slowing the divine little circles around your clit.

Finished, now you stood on shaky legs and continued to wash the conditioner out of your hair.

---

When you made it to the kitchen Sam was sitting the the table. He looked up only to glance at you and then down back at the book in his hands.

“You know, you uh, scared the shit out of Dean earlier-”

“Fuck, I know. I’m sorry I swear I’m not usually like that. I don’t know why I’m acting like this and-”

“Woah, hey,” Sam interrupted, closing his book and placing it on the table. “First of all, you have nothing to apologize for. If anything, Dean owes you an apology. He had no right to barge in on you like that. Second, Y/n, you’re allowed to freak out. You’re grieving, it’s fine. Dean and I have done our fair share of dealing with people’s deaths in our life, we know how it goes,” the alpha said. He stood up and walked towards the fridge.

You immediately went for the liquor cabinet, reaching for your usual. You heard the padding of Sam’s feet and the door of the microwave closing as you poured yourself a drink.

About a minute went by before the microwave went off and by then the kitchen had been filled with an amazing, mouth-watering scent that made your stomach growl. Seriously, why were you so hungry?

Sam grabbed the plate from the microwave and handed it to you.

“Dean’s an idiot but he makes good burgers,” he said, brushing past you close enough for you to get a whiff of his scent. The smell somehow made you feel calm, tame, but you brushed off the feeling after looking at what was down on your plate. “They even taste good after being microwaved.”

It looked and smelled magnificent and you had to catch yourself from moaning at the sight. You sat down next to Sam, who had picked up his book and continued reading.

You took a bite, now not able to control yourself. You let out a small moan in between bites. It was salty and smokey and exactly what you fucking needed right now.

Sam smiled at your delight, “That’s basically exactly how I feel every time he makes those.”

You ate the rest of it while he read his book, content in the easing smell of happy alpha and cheeseburgers. You relaxed for a minute.

---

“This might be a, uh, weird question.. but do you have a shirt I can borrow? This one is like, the only one not drenched in the smell of death but it’s also has a bunch of blood splattered on it. I was gonna ask Dean because you’re like, gigantic, but he’s passed out on the couch,” you said awkwardly.

Sam laughed, “You know we have a washer and dryer, right?”

“I did not know that.”

He laughed again, “Okay, well I’ll show you where they are tomorrow. In the mean time, you can borrow one of my shirts. Come on.”

He led you down the halls and into his room. There, his scent was everywhere. It was strong and caught you off guard, but it smelled amazing. It made your mouth water and you wondered wondered briefly why you were so attracted to his scent.

And then it hit you.

“Oh my god,” you said in utter disbelief.

Sam turned around, “What?”

“Oh my god,” you groaned in annoyance.

“What? What’s wrong?”

“I’m in pre-heat,” you said quietly, too quietly for him to hear. It explained it all: the emotions, the hormones, the hunger, and the mid-shower masturbation session.

“You’re what?” Sam asked, concerned now.

“What day is it?”

“The 14th, why?”

“I’m due for a heat on the 20th, fuck.” All the pieces were being put together, “That’s why I’m being a little bitch-”

“You’re not being a little bit-”

“Yes, I really am. I’m being all emotional because my hormones are fucked, and that’s why I freaked out on Dean. And the freaking nest, and, fuck, that explains the shower and your smell.”

“What happened in the shower?” Was the younger hunter’s first question. “What about the way I smell?” Was his second, sniffing himself.

“I can’t believe I forgot about it,” you said. You paced his room, deep in thought.

“What happened in the shower?” he asked again.

You laughed, “A lot,” is all you said.

He sniffed himself again, “Do I smell bad or something?”

“No, no!” You said quickly. “You smell fucking fantastic,” Sam’s eyebrows rose in question and he looked down at the shirt in his hand.

“That’s not why I wanted the shirt! I really do have blood on this shirt, look,” you pointed to the dark brownish red stain across the front of your shirt.

He handed the shirt to you.

“I believe you,” he said, smirking.

[roadsterguysblog]

Dear Yuletide Author

You are amazing, and thank you so much for this!

I have details for each specific request below the general things.  So, General Things:

My prompts are just that, prompts to get your brain spinning.  If you have a great idea for a fic that isn’t on the prompts, or one of them sends you off on a tangent, write that!  The best fics come from what moves the author.

For general guidelines, though - I love plot.  I love something interesting and canonical going on that I can really sink my teeth into.  If you write that, and you’re not into slash/ship, then that is amazing and makes my Yule.  I love writing that fills in the world of these wonderful fandoms.  There’s nothing better than a little line or unexpected note that answers a question that canon didn’t - what’s the bathroom like?  What do they drink in the morning?  How do they get the news? 

I like first-time fic.  I love a lot of UST and slow burn and people unable to just say what they’re feeling, until something happens and it does.

I’m a physical H/C FIEND.  I love some nice bloody hurt and some nice stoic comfort. I love that combined with the above.

I love a crusty old bastard with a heart of gold.  Even if they happen to be young (a young person can pull off a Crusty Old Bastard if they put the work into it).  It’s my kink.

I love explicit, in-character sex.  If you’re feeling sex, bring that on!  Bring on every bit of sex, good and bad - teeth bumping, coming too fast because this has been such a long burn, santorum, sweat and hot kisses and oral leading to anal or whatever.  Bring it on.

XCOM: Enemy Unknown/Enemy Within (Video Game) 

I came to this game as an old-school player of XCom:UFO Defense. I really love the narrative additions that they made, and particularly Bradford as a character. I found Zhang and Durand to be great additions to this game too! I particularly love Durand's dialog on missions. She's such a goofy deadly little kid. I like the vague hints at Zhang's past, and would really love to explore that more.

I couldn't choose 'all of XCom' as a fandom, so I chose EW. My 'stretch' ask, then, is for some inclusion of the Legacy missions, XCom 2, and/or War of the Chosen with Zhang/Bradford slash - I love the development of XCom as a guerilla group, I love the classes (particularly Rangers!). I love that Bradford was a Ranger and that he fought as one in Legacy and 2. I'd love to see where Zhang was in 2, maybe even a reunion after the events of 2 and before/during Chimera Squad.

If you're looking to write just EW, that would be fantastic too! I'd very much like some in-EW Bradford/Zhang slash. I'm not one for PWP; I love a good juicy narrative. I love the canon, as discussed above, and would really like a fic that builds off of canon. And there's so much! The downtime between missions and the rapid gear-up for them. Bradford trying to figure out anything about Zhang. Zhang and Durand training - Zhang has the experience killing people but no experience with psionic powers, while powers and fighting are both new to Durand, so there's a lot of possibility there. In-mission and/or post-mission fic. Fic during/after the Base Invasion or the Final Mission. Testing out stuff that Shen is making. Being tested by Vahlen. Or anything else you want to explore!

If you're not into slash, that would be fantastic too! I love a good juicy genfic with a lot of great narrative. All of the stuff I mentioned above! If you want to write a fic from the PoV of some random soldier, that'd be delightful too! Or any canon exploration/gapfiller that grabs you that you want to write!

Do Not Want: Durand/Bradford shipping. I just don't see them as a couple at all and the age difference wigs me. I'm fine with them interacting; in fact, one of the things I love about Durand is how much of an Excited Little Kid she is on the missions! So an older battle-hardened dude helping settle her down and give some guidance would be a nice plotline, and platonic affection would be totally good. Ditto Durand/Zhang - platonic relationship is great, just not romantic/sexual.

Too much Commander. I realize that's a little vague, but since the Commander is the headspace of the player, having too much of their thoughts might pull me out? I'm fully there with the Commander being present to direct missions, chatting around with people, being supportive of characters during the fic, serving as Commander Ex Machina to move the plot along, things like that.

Scat/piss play (I'm fine with playing with the blood (human and/or alien) and sweat of battle as being either potentially sexy or a strange counterpoint to sexiness)

Out-of-character-ness

Homophobia/transphobia/racism by the main characters. As a gay trans dude, I am very down with any of them being gay/trans/queer/etc and experiencing it, and I'm even OK if they accidentally find that some of their activities are - but just no overt, knowing bigotry. (Bradford does have xenophobic tendencies, and I'd actually find that a cool angle to explore, as I think he's a fundamentally decent guy who's had a fuck of a time and suffers from some degree of toxic masculinity.)

XCOM 2 (Video Game)

I came to this game as an old-school player of XCom:UFO Defense. I really love the narrative additions that they made, and particularly Bradford as a character. I love the world of XCom2 - they do such a wonderful job of building Advent's Stepford Cities, the scattered resistance havens, XCom as a guerilla group, the Speaker, the various aliens, the Chosen, the classes of warriors, Lily Shen's badassery, Dr Tygan's smooth stoicism, Advent Burgers (ARE PEOPLE!) - all of it!

I couldn't choose 'all of XCom' as a fandom, so I chose XCom2. My 'stretch' ask, then, is for inclusion of some EW plotlines - particularly Zhang, because I loved him as a character. I love me some Braford/Zhang slash, so if you want to pull him in - see what he was doing in parallel at the time, or reunion after 2/during Chimera Squad - I would be just delighted.

If you're not into writing that or didn't play EW, an XCom2 fic would be fantastic! I loved Legacy, I loved 2 (with the missions Shen and Bradford do), I loved WotC. There's so much there! I love that Bradford was a Ranger (I'd be delighted for fics of him getting down and dirty and bloody with a sword), I loved that Tygan had a Thing for Advent Burgers, I loved that Bradford got mad that the wrappers kept getting left around. I loved that Shen and Tygan kept giving Bradford shit for his flying. I think it's interesting that Bradford turned alcoholic after the base invasion, and I'd be interested in explorations of that, and if he started to get control of it when the Avenger took off and things started to go well. I love the Skirmishers, I love Mox - I'd love some more of their backstory, and/or how things go for them after the events of the game. (Generally, any Adaption To Civilian Life And Living Amongst The Aliens sort of fic really tickles me). If you want to write a fic from the PoV of some random soldier, that'd be delightful too! Or even the PoV of a young civilian who has known nothing but Advent and slowly realizes what's going on. Basically, anything that fleshes out/extends/expands the wonderful rich canon of this game.

Do Not Want: Shen/Bradford shipping. I love love love them as a Surly Old Loving Dad and Spunky Smart Loving Kid, so I love that dynamic, and would love to read some of them awkwardly expressing their mutual affection on that level, but just no to romance or sex.

Too much Commander. I realize that's a little vague, but since the Commander is the headspace of the player, having too much of their thoughts might pull me out? I'm fully there with the Commander being present to direct missions, chatting around with people, being supportive of characters during the fic, serving as Commander Ex Machina to move the plot along, things like that.

Scat/piss play (I'm fine with playing with the blood (human and/or alien) and sweat of battle as being either potentially sexy or a strange counterpoint to sexiness)

Out-of-character-ness

Homophobia/transphobia/racism by the main characters. As a gay trans dude, I am very down with any of them being gay/trans/queer/etc and experiencing it, and I'm even OK if they accidentally find that some of their activities are - but just no overt, knowing bigotry. (Bradford does have xenophobic tendencies, and I'd actually find that a cool angle to explore, as I think he's a fundamentally decent guy who's had a fuck of a time and suffers from some degree of toxic masculinity.)

Ship Series - Anne McCaffrey

What can I say, I'm a Helva/Niall shipper. That being said, I think there's a lot that's dysfunctional about their relationship. The way chastity is valued so highly, the way that she thinks of herself as a chaste armored Valkyrie (the armor protecting her equally from both sex and physical harm). The awkwardness around any thought of physical contact - and yes, it's dangerous for her to be outside of the shell, but there are so many workarounds. Her shell is wired for sensation, after all, there's no reason that creative ways to make love to a ship couldn't be played with. And they never do anything around physical intimacy with their mental connection, even though it's explicitly written that Helva can sense what Niall does.

I'm also very skeeved by the way she turns off his hologram after he's dead. The hologram seems to have some degree of independent thought, the way it's written. Is it a sentient AI, perhaps? Or did he fully transfer to her subconscious after his body died, and this is his way of having some consciousness? None of these issues were explored, and I'd be delighted if you want to give them a go.

I'm also totally down with fics that don't go into the side of things I laid out above. I'd be delighted for mission fics, gapfillers, fics where they have to deal with Central Command. Action and adventure!

I'd love fics that explore some of the issues of toxic straight culture and toxic masculinity. These characters are great and interesting and flawed, and I love fics that acknowledge and embrace the flaws.

Also, I'm fully down with Niall being written as trans and/or bi/pan, if that strikes your fancy (and if you want to put that into the She Can Sense What He Does context). I know he's represented as being with women a lot, but I'd love a subversion of that as being down to some toxic straight culture (already abundant evidence for that in canon!) and/or overcompensation for being the butt of the flavor of toxic masculinity that considers short stature to be a deficit in men.

Do not want: True downplaying of short guys. Niall is sensitive about being tinchy, but I don't want that written as something that's actually, objectively wrong with him. As a short trans guy, I'm on board with him expressing that insecurity, I'm fine with stories playing with that insecurity, I'd awfully like a fic where the insecurity is helped to some extent.

Scat/piss play

Out-of-character-ness

Lucky Starr - Isaac Asimov

What can I say? Never has 1950s sensibility lead to a more homoerotic set of stories!

That being said, I also love how scientifically based it is. That's what I want from this fandom - a true Lucky Starr fic that is solidly grounded in some real science, and has some of the real science come back as part of the Twist Ending. If you want to put some explicit Lucky/Bigman slash in there, I'd be delighted. But if you don't, a gen Lucky Starr story is already pretty damn slashy to me. :)

I love the whole world. I love the Sirians and all of the biological 'lessons' their perceived but not-actual superiority could represent. I love Sten insulting Bigman and Bigman getting his own. I'd love more exploration of Sten's comment about Lucky making an excellent Sirian.

I'd be delighted with a fic that explores the paucity of females in-universe, particularly in positions of leadership. Ditto a fic that explores how white and US/European the culture is.

I particularly love the Bigman/Yonge friendship. Although Yonge is technically the Ideal Tall Strong Man, he'd be a little at sea now that he's left Sirius - he doesn't know the society, the norms, the conventions. I'd love to explore their friendship a little more, with Yonge getting over all he's been indoctrinated to believe about Sirian Superiority. Particularly since that gets at a very valid biological point, to tie into the scientific underpinnings of Lucky Starr episodes!

If you want to write either Yonge, Bigman, or both as gay, I'd find that an interesting fic for sure! Although my preference is Lucky/Bigman, I'm interested in a Bigman/Yonge, especially if it leads to Lucky/Bigman. :)

If you want to write Bigman as trans, I'm totally down with that.

Do not want: True downplaying of short guys. I know there's a fair bit of that in canon, beyond just Bigman's sensitivity about it, but I don't want that written as something that's actually, objectively wrong with him. As a short trans guy, I'm on board with him expressing that insecurity, I'm fine with stories playing with that insecurity, I'd awfully like a fic where the insecurity is helped to some extent. I'm fine with canon-level teasing of him about it, but always in the context of Lucky genuinely caring for him and him bringing real value to Lucky's work.

Scat/piss play

Out-of-character-ness

Homophobia/transphobia/racism by the main characters. As a gay trans dude, I am very down with any of them being gay/trans/queer/etc and experiencing it, and even if they accidentally find that some of their activities are, but just no overt, knowing bigotry.

[theexistentiallyqueer]

Hoes are just mad because akeshu is basically canon now

I started answering this and it started getting really long and I realized I have a lot to say about topics of lateral violence and this was probably not what you were expecting when you sent me this ask but oh dear oh god the floodgates are fucking open.

That’s really it in it’s most basic simplicity. Atlus poured a fuckton of money to expand Persona 5, to give us more time and another chance to experience the story they wanted to tell us, and what Atlus wants to tell us is that it’s Goro loving hours up in this Big Bang Burger tonight. 

But they can’t get their rocks off anonymously harassing a corporation, so they go after fans instead, and they couch their harassment and their attempted bullying in explicitly moral terms with absolutely no self-awareness that their behavior is categorically abusive of real people while they’re raining hate on fictional ones.

And this is also starting to get deeply personal so I’ll put the rest under a cut just to spare your browser if you’d really rather keep on scrolling.

I do understand the mindset, because like I said, I’ve been there. And I do actually feel pretty bad for that anon. I think their behavior is disgusting, and I’m lucky that I’m immune to that shit, but I’m sure for plenty of other people who’ve been getting hit by them today it’s emotionally taxing to have to deal with that. 

But I understand it, because when you’re self-isolating and spiraling, you know what such a quick fix is? Using fiction as a coping method. Which can be healthy and can be unhealthy but when you’re angry on top of everything else, and you’re specifically angry at yourself for being so sad and miserable all the time and at other people for not giving you a chance, you tend to find excuses to lash out and unleash that anger on other people.

People are like soda bottles. We can only handle so much pressure, and when there’s too much it has nowhere to go but out. Crack the seal us a little and the insides spray everywhere.

And the reason I feel bad for people like that so specifically is because all of that is an act of psychological self-harm. Being that full of anger all the time is harmful to your own health. Hurting other people like that just because you need to feel something is a double-edged blade.

Which!!! Leads me to Goro. Because I think that’s what he does and who he is at the start of the game and what makes it so deeply ironic is that this person who hates Goro so much they feel the need to spam his fans with verbally violent hatred is acting exactly the same way Goro acts, but with less guns involved.

Another thing I’m always very open about, especially where the topic of Goro and how much I love him as a character comes up: my dad was murdered in an armed robbery when I was nine, and I went through a lot of really hard work and a mess of feelings and plenty of very justified hurt and rage before I found myself in a place where I actually forgive the man who killed him.

And if anyone is reading this far, I want to stop you now before you say you’re sorry or tell me how strong I am or that I’m so brave. That’s not what this is about. I’m not digging deep into my personal trauma so that you can feel like you have to go through all of those social platitudes that feel so necessary. They’re not needed and I feel like they’d detract from what I’m trying to say here. What I’ve gone through is a simple fact of my life to me. I was nine when it happened. I’m thirty years old now.

None of it came easily, and it took so much hard work. And on the other side of it was me sitting with the growing understanding that violence has a kickback effect. Causing violence has a kickback effect. The vast majority of people are fundamentally decent, and sometimes decent and kind people do fucked up things and hurt other people for complex reasons. Reasons that need to be understood, because violence is structural, violence is systemic, etc., etc.

But doing those things is both an act of violence against another person and an act of harm of your own self. Deliberate harm, if that action is premeditated.

To focus this back onto Goro: killing people is a a traumatic act, and trauma spreads like ink in water. It doesn’t just touch the people who loved the victim but the person who killed them too. Goro isn’t a serial killer, Goro is a kid out of options who was pressured into joining a gang and I think it’s pretty clear that he was way in over his head but had no one to help pull him out.

Radicalism doesn’t happen on accident. Interpersonal violence doesn’t happen on accident. Teenagers acting out violently doesn’t happen on accident. There’s always a story, a system, and countless people who failed.

And I’m at the point where I was in the middle of writing this and I had to leave because I have social things to do, and I’m getting back to this now and I forgot half of what I wanted to say.

But I’ve said what I’ve said up until now.

[tomhiddleslove]

Betrayal Cast Tom Hiddleston, Zawe Ashton and Charlie Cox on Pinter, Broadway and Fate

The cast sat down with Variety to discuss squash and other games people play, with what Pinter means to them, and how their paths have crossed in the past, leading to this moment.

What does it mean to you to be here in New York, making your Broadway debut?

Zawe Ashton: It is a dream come true, actually. I’ve seen some of the best things I’ve ever seen in this very theater, including the show previous to us, “The Ferryman.”

Tom Hiddleston: I first came to Broadway with my dad and my sisters when I was 17. It was my first time seeing the city and I remember going into Times Square and we went to see “Follies.” This was before I was even thinking about being an actor — or maybe in the back of my head I had decided. The first time I was in this theater I saw Samuel L. Jackson and Angela Bassett doing “The Mountaintop.”

Charlie, you actually live out here, are you planning on showing them around?

Charlie Cox: Oh, yes. There’s a few places I want to take them.

Ashton: [Laughs] How can you make that sound sinister?

Cox: I’m not sure the places I like will be what you’re imagining. I want to take them to Bubby’s. It’s a restaurant with a great all-American brunch.

What does “all-American” mean to Brits?

Cox: Fried chicken and waffles.

Hiddleston: And big portions.

Cox: And coffee that keeps being filled up. You have to put a napkin over it to stop them.

Hiddleston: Right. If you have a second coffee in the UK you have to pay for it.

Cox: It’s crazy. When I get my coffee, I need to put my milk and sugar and the proportions have to be right. When they fill your coffee up over here, the proportions are all off. Also, you feel like you’re on rocket fuel and you don’t know why.

Ashton: Anything else we need to experience?

Cox: Well, these two are too healthy but I’d love to introduce you to half-and-half. It’s one of the best inventions in the world. It’s cream and milk.

Hiddleston: I know about that. This isn’t, like, my first time in America.

Cox: Oh, and I’d love to introduce you to McDonald’s. [Laughs.]

Hiddleston: I’m really excited about the seasons. I’ve spent time in New York before but it’s only been for like two weeks at a time. To be here from summer into fall into winter…

Cox: Fall is an illusion in New York. You get a weekend in the 70s, and that’s it.

Ashton: No, but the colors and the trees! And Thanksgiving is going to be amazing!

How did you first become familiar with the work ofHarold Pinter and specifically “Betrayal”?

Hiddleston: For my A-Level English literature, we did a play of Pinter’s called “The Homecoming.” What I found so interesting was “The Homecoming” was so spare and so precise and so grown-up. I remember my teacher encouraging us to think about this play as about power and sex and family, all in a very brutal way. That it’s a father and sons competing for supremacy. I remember thinking: “This is reading a bit too much into it, isn’t it?” But it isn’t. As a 17-year-old, I just didn’t realize there was a writer engaging so consciously at this level.

Then I read “Betrayal” at the Royal Academy of Dramatic arts as an exercise for a dramaturgy class. I read it in one sitting and I did think, at the age of 21, “This would be an amazing thing to do one day.”

Ashton: We did a couple months of scene study at drama school and I played Anna in “Old Times.” I was 19 and I loved it and we actually nailed the scene study. I mean, we were 19-year-olds, maybe it was terrible. But my head of year said to me: “If I had known how easy Pinter was going to be for you, I would have given you something else.”

Was it easy?

Ashton: No! It wasn’t easy! But what I think he identified that if you vibe with Pinter, you’re kind of a special breed of person. If you can lean into all the violence and brutality and also see the tenderness and experience the special viewpoint he has of human relationships, you have a friend for life.

And you vibed with him from the start?

Ashton: 100%. And now I love him even more. Doing “Betrayal” is about having to invest in a love affair with these two men, but I also feel I’ve invested in a love affair with Pinter. I’ve wanted to read his poetry, I’ve wanted to think about him, I’ve wanted to read the books Joan Bakewell and Lady Antonia Fraser wrote about him. Just to try and piece together the man who I’ve never met. Charlie has.

You’ve met Pinter?

Cox: The first play I did in the West End was with Jamie Lloyd, “The Lover/The Collection.” Harold was part of numerous rehearsals and came to see the play many times. I got some great Harold stories that I’m still dining out on! During that time, I read “Betrayal.” Harold died the following year. It’s funny, my wife and I live in Connecticut and when I was offered this play I walked into my local bookshop and it was sitting right there.

A year ago, you didn’t know you’d be doing “Betrayal” in London, let alone here.

Cox: Four weeks ago we didn’t know we’d be here! It all happened very fast. When we closed in London, we thought we were done.

My understanding is this all began last October, when Tom and Zawe did a reading from the play at the “Pinter at the Pinter” gala?

Ashton: It sprung from that gala and people thinking we were rehearsing it already. People kept coming up to me and asking if we were doing a full production. So at the gala I basically came up to Tom and said, “What are you doing in March 2019?” And you were like, “Uh, get away from me, crazy lady.”

Hiddleston: It was an interesting night because it was celebration of all his work as a gift to [his widow] Antonia Fraser and it was 10 years after he died. But it wasn’t a heavy night, it was a celebration. And people came back to do extracts. The production Jamie Lloyd directed of “The Homecoming” came back. Jeremy Irons came back to do “No Man’s Land.”

Wait, Jeremy Irons starred in the film version of “Betrayal.”  Were you intimidated to do a scene in front of him?

Hiddleston: Well, less intimidated because I played his son in “The Hollow Crown.” There were several “Betrayal” alumni. Sam West was there, who played Robert at the Donmar Warehouse. Kristin Scott Thomas, who has played Emma, was also there. There was something very generous about this company of great, established actors who had made a great impact with Pinter’s work saying to Zawe and myself, “If you’re not doing it, you should do it.”

Ashton: It was such a compliment.

Hiddleston: Then Antonia Fraser also said, “Would you like to do it?” And Jamie leaned across and said, “Let’s do it!” So it came together very fast. And Jamie’s first suggestion for Jerry was Charlie, but he said you couldn’t do it.

Cox: The show I was doing [“Daredevil”] was going to be scheduled for another season at the time. So they went out to find somebody else. Then my show got cancelled and I called my agent and said I would love to do a play. I didn’t hear for a bit and I finally got him on the phone and was about to say “I’ve been trying to call you!” — but in a very nice, English way. And before I could say anything he said, “How would you like to do ‘Betrayal’ with Zawe Ashton and Tom Hiddleston?” I paused and said, “I’d like that very much.”

Ashton: If “Daredevil” hadn’t been canceled you wouldn’t have been able to do it.

That has to take some of sting out of cancellation.

Cox: It did, yeah.

This play doesn’t work without the chemistry between the characters, even when they are constantly competing and  one-upping each other. Did you know each other prior to working together and was that chemistry pretty instant?

Cox: Tom and I knew each other. We were bouncing around L.A. at the same time early in our careers.

Hiddleston: The truth is, we first met bumping into each other auditions for the same films that neither of us would get. After like the fourth time, we said, “Let’s go get a burger.”

Ashton: We’d been intersecting for years. Weird things have happened: Tom and I sat next to each other years before at the theater. We did the gala but weirdly, we’d also done a reading a couple weeks before that. And then Charlie and I realized we had auditioned together years ago.

Cox: I’m almost sure it was you. I didn’t get it.

Ashton: I didn’t either. And it was definitely you.

Hiddleston: That’s how most actors know each, they audition for things they don’t get.

Ashton: This could be the most unpleasant experience; it could really be toxically bad. What has happened is it has been the most joyful experience ever. That’s not to say we’re not completely embedded in the raw pain of the play. But I think you realize when you get to a certain age that you don’t need it to bleed into your lives and you don’t need to carry it home. I don’t want to do that with Harold Pinter because you can and you will go mad.

Hiddleston: It’s one of those things, you can’t put your finger on why it works, but it works and it’s a great pleasure.

Cox: That one-upmanship you talked about that’s in the text; if that were to manifest between us as actors, it would be awful.

Ashton: However…there was a squash game.

Cox: Let’s not talk about that.

Ashton: It did spill over into that game.

Cox: Look, it’s not about who wins or loses, it’s about who’s fitter. And Tom is fitter than I am.

Hiddleston: It was very instructive, playing squash. Some of those scenes, the competition is in the subtext, the brutality to each other is underneath it while they’re being civil on the surface. After we played squash, those scenes played themselves.

Cox: I still have a buttock injury from that last game. I was desperately trying to reach a ball because I was so determined to keep up! We had one day where we had five solid sessions and then Zawe joined us for the spa.

Leaving behind these characters at the end of the day could be a challenge. Are you able to do that?

Cox: Sometimes I’ll be at the end of the day and I’ll be agitated in some way and then I remember; of course, I just got off stage.

Ashton: I’ve often said I’ve felt like a baby who needed to be burped. There’s so much repression in the play and people aren’t saying what they mean and you want to cry but you have to hold it in. Sometimes I want to cry for three days.

Hiddleston: My favorite actor of all time Paul Scofield said: “The emotions are real, but they aren’t mine.” Which I think sums it up. Actors investigate something real but the situation doesn’t belong to them. So I know consciously I’m not Robert, I know I haven’t been betrayed. But when I investigate his sadness, some aspect of that belongs to me. It sometimes leaves a shadow.

“Betrayal” has been performed in America before, obviously, but are you curious about how Broadway audiences will respond versus London audiences?

Cox: We get a lot of Americans in London. I don’t think it’s going to be radically different.

Ashton: I think it’s going to be radically different. I think there’s going to be some exciting new things having an American audience is going to illuminate. I think it’s going to be interesting.

“Betrayal” runs at the Bernard B. Jacobs Theatre through Dec. 8.

[ayankun]

Ok, if you haven’t already (I say this to be polite, I know you haven’t) go put your eyes on this episode synopsis first.  Why?  Because it’s a good time.  But mostly because I want you to be tangentially familiar with certain topics so I can better explain what happened to my brain while watching this one.

oh, right, this post is a synopsis of the VR Troopers episode 2x13 “Kaitlin Through the Looking Glass” btw

4

3

2

1

WE

ARE

V

R

Now that you’ve got this far, here’s some housekeeping before we start:

I watched this show sporadically as a kid and have very fond memories of it “being better than Power Rangers” but really didn’t know anything about it at the time.  I am watching it as an adult partly due to nostalgia but mostly because I genuinely enjoy it.  Not necessarily because of the reasons they intended, but, you know.

As an adult, with a different understanding of the world than when I was seven, I willfully misconstrue the main characters as being in a polyamorous relationship.  OT3 baybee

On a similar tangent, Ryan “Trooper TRANSform” Steele is obviously trans.  (transgent??)

Hell, maybe they all are.  The more the merrier amirite.

They all call the Professor “Puhfessor,” so I will, too.

Still with me?  Let’s begin.

(first up, though, the title sequence is over a minute long, when really they only needed like, maybe 15 seconds to get the point across.  there is also a ton of footage used that portrays events that never occur and also the song is not catchy enough to warrant any of this and I love it)

So in Ryan’s flashback intro, he muses about how, as a kid, he felt the need to prove himself.  He expresses this to his dad by asking when he’ll get a black belt, and his dad is a good supportive dad who tells him:

“It’s not the belt that’s important, son,”

Ryan’s dad says trans rights.

Ryan’s VO goes on to say "My dad taught me that it’s not outward appearances that really count, and that was an important lesson that would come in handy time and time again.”

Ryan really loves memories of his dad.

Which I think is a sweet lesson to learn when you’re young and other youngs (and olds) are going to give you crap about how you look, but it’s also hilariously phrased considering how superficial the concept of “outward appearances” is to this episode.

So we jump into things down at the ... Voice Underground Daily idk what the newspaper is called, I’m just trying to read the sign on the wall tbh.  We’re at Kaitlin’s place of business, and Woody (I think his name is Woody LOLOL how many episodes have I seen) shows Kaitlin this front page article which appears to have the headline:

ZIKTOR DEFEATED AT CITY HALL -- NO TOXIC WASTE DUMPING AT CROSS WORLD PARK

Ok, a couple of things.

Kaitlin and Percy are just ... chilling out at the copy machine like they’re friends and this is where the cool kids hang out.

Which can’t possibly be true because the actual cool kids are there in the back, just reading newspapers like Actual Cool Kids do.

They’re an indie paper, right?  How can they afford to print headlines that verbose?  ... Or full color glossy, for that matter

THEY ACCIDENTALLY PLAYED THIS LIKE THEY WERE EXCITED ABOUT THE NEWS ITSELF AND NOT ABOUT KAITLIN DOING A GOOD JOB ON AN IMPORTANT FRONT PAGE PIECE

Environmentalism was No Joke in kids’ media in the 90s.  I specifically remember learning the word “toxic” from a Power Rangers episode where Billy tested the lake water.  I literally had to look it up.

and they say you can’t learn nuffink from tv

Anyway, part of the excitement is that this article is the follow up to an expose of Ziktor, also authored by Kaitlin, which inspired the city officials to veto his waste-dumping proposal.  So we’re proud of Kaitlin for doing a good job at journalism and for protecting the world!

JB does what JB does best and attempts to arrange a date.

The line is, “Hey, let’s celebrate!  With lunch!  At Hamburger Hutch” but I guess someone at Netflix got lazy for a second.

I forgot to mention, in my HC he’s our token ace (as my favorites often are), so he tends to go overboard with the romance.  You don’t have to compensate for anything, JB!

Kaitlin appreciates the gesture.

But then Woody interjects and I let my adult sense of humor get the better of me...

come on, the man’s name is Woody I can’t be the only one with my mind in the gutter can I

Also the line is “I don’t want you boys filling up my star reporter” so what am I supposed to thINK

--WITH JUNK FOOD.  Dodged an FCC bullet there.

So I just now gave it 2 seconds thought and the discrepancies with the subtitles probably have something to do with the expectation that children would be watching this show and can’t read that fast.  BOY DO I NOT FIT THE DEMOGRAPHIC

Ok well.

Where Woody’s going with this is that he wants to impose a health shake on Kaitlin for godknowswhy.  But it’s all good because as he todders off to get started on what will surely be a monstrosity, we get this ADORABLE moment where Kaitlin tries to get JB to come to her rescue.

She just runs up and grabs him.  I’m all a-flutter.

But JB is of no help.  Instead, he calls dibs on her fries.

There’s a weird, under-baked joke going on here that seems to be rooted in the idea that if one is dieting then others benefit from this self-sacrifice by gleefully picking up the slack?  Anyway Kaitlin’s not on a diet?  This vitamin shake angle literally came out of nowhere?  Is against her will???

Just one burger, please.  Protein style :<

et tu, Jeb??

Anyway, this weird exchange just passes the time to get Woody all set up.  He turns on the blender and THE WHOLE WORLD STARTS SHAKING. 

Percy runs over to be the hero, demanding Woody turn the blender off, while everyone else just rumbles around looking distraught and not practicing anything resembling safe earthquake response.  Percy manages to get a hold of the blender, lifting it off the counter, and -- you guessed it -- the lid comes off and purreed-carrot-baby-food-looking goop gets all over his nerdy white button up.

The shaking stops.  Percy’s very proud of himself (and disdainful of the others who didn’t come to his heroic conclusion).  End scene.

I’ll be real.  At this juncture, literally thought that the blender HAD caused a natural disaster, and it was just a wacky 90s gag that went on for far too long.

More on this story as it develops.  We’re moving on.

How many cities in the world do you think have ominous buildings in them that aren’t secret headquarters for supervillains?

Our good buddy Karl Ziktor is reading -- wait for it -- Kaitlin’s article.  It has a headline so long they had to dedicate the full front page for it.  I’m pretty sure that’s not how newspapers are commonly formatted.

That is literally just a couple of newspaper clippings taped to a big piece of paper.

Oh he’s mad.  He tells Juliet all about his evil plan for revenge, which is to “steal her virtual image and create a second Kaitlin Starr [that serves him]”.

Same, Juliet.

Off that yikes, a henchwoman comes in to appraise Ziktor of the status of phase one, which is underway.  A so-called Stingbot is “in the basement of the Underground Voice” so that’s what the paper’s name is, anyway.

Anyway so Stingbot was the one responsible for the earlier tremors.  And, yeah, I mean I know they were new cobbling stories together from old footage, but What The Hell do “sting” and “earthquake” and “outward appearances” have in common?

And that is how a Stingbot do.

My question is partially answered, in that Stingbot’s earthquakes are a distraction so that some skugs can plant the “Virtual Mirror Transmitter” on Kaitlin, which is the nefarious device that will create the aforementioned Kaitlin-2.  Bold of him to assume that just because Kaitlin’s a woman that she 1) carries a purse 2) stores a mini pink mirror in the purse 3) will look at herself in the mirror unprovoked.

It’s such a wildly twentieth-century concept.  Here in good ol’ 2020, I, for one, have not looked in a mirror in months.

Ugh more gross than this use of outdated stereotypes is this weird tongue thing Ziktor does while almost literally salivating after his upcoming revenge.  You’ll have to go see it for yourself, I’m not going to watch it again to cap it.

(This guy gives his 200% to this role, though.  What a legend. RIP Gardner Baldwin)

So Ziktor blue-skadoos into his virtual stronghold and gets an update from his generals.  There’s this new guy that I’ve already also forgotten the name, and since he has a human face, there’s a lot of awkward cuts between him and his Japanese counterpart in the footage that’s already ten years old at the time.  It probably looked great.  I was an adult before I found out that Rita Repulsa was the original Japanese actress in the original dubbed Japanese footage.

Anyway, he looks great.

I think I read that for season 2 they had access to and/or recreated the costumes used in/matching the source material, so there’s a noticeable uptick in cool-looking sets with American actors wearing cool-looking costumes, like this one.

You said it.

That’s about it for this scene, but before we go to commercials, Grimlord says this nonsense:  “I will destroy Kaitlin Starr with the one weapon she cannot defend against -- herself.”

Confirmed: Kaitlin is a deadlier weapon than, say, a homing missile.  (she can defend herself from those)

Ok we’re back at the Underground Voice and there’s still an earthquake going on.  Also, and let me tell you this with a large amount of regret of my life-choices, I’ve been sitting here for just about two hours and we are only five minutes into the episode (and that includes the minute long opening credits.)

Let’s roll!

JB gets off the phone with who knows who, having learned that there’s no earthquake registering anywhere, it’s a localized mysterious incident.  Ryan recommends they clear the building “just to be safe.”  My boy, why wasn’t that everyone’s first thought?  Are they really just standing around waiting to be told?  We had drills for this for a reason!

(Actually, I’m not sure where Cross World City is located.  Maybe they’re not on a fault line and do not actually do drills)

In any case, there’s a brief PSA where Woody wants to collect his valuables to take with him, and everyone has to inform him that that’s ill-advised behavior in an evacuation scenario.

He responds in classic Woody nonsense, by putting on a captain’s hat and insisting he’ll go down with his ship.  AND OUR BOY JB SAYS

He’s still thinking about that date.

LOOK.  There’s no rule that says asexuals can’t make dirty jokes.  Because we can and do.  Let me have this.

So our heroes herd everyone out of the building and then stay behind to call the Puhfessor.  Just as they get him on the computer, the earthquake stops. 

It’s not all good news, though.  The Puhfessor taps into some kind of impossible CC feed and they watch Stingbot undermining the structural integrity of the building.  Stingbot, by the way, has one of those creepy child laughs that is insane.  It’s so good.

Ryan decides to check out the basement himself while Kaitlin and JB keep everyone else outside.  He finds some creepy janitors down there, and they head on up like creeps normal janitors.

Maybe they were just hotboxing down there.

Stingbot’s also in the basement!  Who knows what he was doing down there, because

Murder hornet, colorized, 2020

Which is a weird thing to say until you remember the slight, throwaway “yummy!” he says earlier while drilling into the building.  I had forgotten it in the 40 seconds it took for me to get from that moment to here.

Ryan insults Stingbot’s outward appearance, which is odd because I thought he learned that lesson as a kid.  Either way, it’s time to

WE ARE V R

Only to spend about half a second on recycled footage just to have Stingbot go “lol, later loser.”  Because those perfectly normal janitors are upstairs swapping Kaitlin’s purse mirror with the evil thing.

Can you imagine trying to pull a stunt like this today?

Outside, things have calmed down enough that JB thinks Ryan’s got it under control.  He’s gonna go back in “to see if the building’s safe enough to reenter.”  I know he knows it’s not a real earthquake, but also I don’t think I’d trust a non-professional to assess my office’s structural integrity.

Kaitlin’s going to join him, which causes Percy to pipe up, Pavlovianly ... just to chicken out and stay put.  GOOD JOB PERCY.  USING YOUR HEAD FOR ONCE I SEE.

(kids, don’t volunteer to check that a building is safe after an incident where its safety may be in question.  it is not cowardly to leave it to Someone Who Knows What They’re Doing)

So JB and Kaitlin come back in to find the Normal Janitors shadily stealing a floppy disk from Kaitlin’s desk.  (kids, a floppy disk is a real object that looks a lot like the “save” icon)   BUT OF COURSE THEY’RE SKUGS SO JB AND KAITLIN HAVE TO THROW DOWN.

Let’s just say there’s a good thing they have an earthquake to blame all this property damage on.

JB’s a little snippy.

All he wanted was to go to lunch with his girlfriend and boyfriend.

The gold skugs do their fusion dance thing and turn into the oni-mask skug variant, which I’m assuming is a constraint of these later episodes where they used footage from a show that did not have the gold ones in.

FLIRTY BATTLEFIELD BANTER UGH I SHIP IT

Once that’s handled, we find out what Ryan’s been up to in the basement by himself this whole time.

Um.  I’m not touching that one with a 10-foot ... wait.

Ohhhh

Ryan heads back up and swaps notes with JB and Kaitlin.  Stingbot said that its work was done, so what exactly was it trying to accomplish?  Ryan then runs from there outside to check on everyone else.

Kaitlin then decides she needs to freshen up, which is something I don’t recall her ever needing or wanting to do after any other natural disaster/fight portrayed on this show.

But look how cute they are with their mutual post-fight shoulder-pat.  JB even gives her this cute little look as she darts off.  He is smitten.

He is smote.

Kaitlin gets her mirror out of her purse, as planned, and checks herself out.  You know.  Like how woman do.

She gets it.

This is it!  Grimlord’s chance to strike!  He will have his revenge, Juliet, just you wait!

for great justice

We are treated to a brief bit of delightful 80s Japanese sci-fi, all flashing lights and chonky beep boop buttons.  It works!  A tastefully gendered laser light shoots out of Kaitlin’s mirror and STEALS HER FACE OFF HER FACE

FACE/OFF

The experience seems highly unpleasant, but she’s mostly ok...

But wait, who’s this ...

It’s not really the Mirror Universe unless someone gets a goatee.

Kaitlin’s freaked out, but we don’t have time to see her process what it was that just happened.  More beep boop 80s lights (seizure warning much), and the virtual replica Kaitlin is 3D printed in Grimlord’s lair.

lol he’s got a play date

So this Kaitlin is the same exact person as real Kaitlin, with one major difference.

So this got dark, right?  This is different from that time they cloned Ryan, because that was just a DNA clone man baby with evil sunglasses; this is actually Kaitlin, the person, just with some programming differences, who’s gonna go back out there and hurt her boys herself.

Needless to say, Grimlord is delighted.

Check out that disgruntled wall snake, tho.  “I thought I was your lovely child”

Now Grimlord’s plan is to send Kaitlin into the wild with a device called the “fissicator” which is a “sTUn ray!!” (you have to hear him say it, it’s so good) as well as a thing that will reprogram the Trooper’s “contact disk.”

I didn’t mention it earlier, but that’s the disk that the janitors skugs were trying to steal, and it was also how Kaitlin called up the Puhfessor on her work computer.  I’m pretty sure we’ve never seen it before and we never see it again.  It’s Not A Thing.

So Kaitlin goes to Tao’s, where Ryan’s just chilling there by himself.  I guess everyone was okay after the earthquake, then.  (It is unclear how much time has passed)  Maybe it’s been hundreds of years, because Ryan acts like he’s not sure who she is.

Wait, hold on.  I did NOT pay close enough attention the first time, but -- either it’s much later the same day and/or they missed a scene.  They’re still wearing the same clothes ... and Ryan says he thought she was heading (back?) to the paper ... and then she says ....

Ryan.exe has stopped executing

Wait so WHAT.  What workout.  We have not been to Tao’s yet this episode.  ???

It’s really just a ruse to get Ryan to fight her, though.  But also.  Why need ruse?  Evil clone?  Just attack tho, right?

But also no NO.  DONT attack.  We’ve already seen JB be beat up by his evil clone boyfriend.  It’s rough.  (spoiler alert, this one’s gonna be rough, too)

So Ryan tries to let her down easy by saying he doesn’t have time -- and I can’t tell with this video quality, but I don’t think he’s wearing a watch but he does the “look at wrist” technique and it’s p good.

Kaitlin-2 refuses to be let down easy.

Them’s fightin words

Ryan ends up splayed out on the desk but seriously, now is not the time.

He rightfully wants to know what’s up, but she keeps taunting him to fight her.  She takes the first shot, which he dodges and blocks before disengaging.  Remember, kids, just because somebody picks a fight with you doesn’t mean you don’t have any other options!

She won’t stop coming for him, though, so he gets her arms pinned so he can try talking her down again. 

This technique backfires.

no more mr nice kaitlin

So in the other clone episode, this scene was staged in a room full of people, and even though JB was blindsided, he and Ryan are ostensibly evenly matched.  It wasn’t nice for JB, but at least someone was there to break up the fight.

This time though, Ryan’s been gently if firmly trying to diffuse a confusing situation where someone without his training is behaving irrationally and is going to get both of them hurt.  So far his attempts to de-escalate have failed, and there is no deus ex intervention incoming.

AND THEN she goes and plays the superpowers card on him.  Black belt or no, the whole point of having the Trooper alter ego is that they come with amazingly OP combat powers capable of defeating all manner of monsters.

And Kaitlin, a very very very dear close friend has just walked up out of nowhere and dropped a nuke on him.

Okay, so she throws him over a table, it’s the principle of the thing.

This overkill maneuver knocks him out cold.  She lifts Ryan’s Trooper communicator (so he can’t call for help when he comes to -- omg this is so chilling) and then uses the fissicator to call Grimlord for further instructions.

Gotta catch ‘em all

New Kaitlin, who dis?

So he now wants her to steal the disk, reprogram the disk, and use the reprogrammed disk to break all the Trooper computer stuff.  She reads his order back like

Close enough, I guess.

She gleefully moves on to her next task, leaving a helpless Ryan struggling and failing to regain consciousness.  :<<<<<<<

At the paper, real Kaitlin gets a message from JB on her little Trooper video phone and secretly Trooper TRANSforms out of there from inside the darkroom.  This was the point where I realized they had different ones!  Hers and JB’s are red and white, while Ryan’s (that just got stole) is red/blue.

Also, you can just see under all those crayons, but that’s the “contact disk” that Kaitlin-2 is coming for.  (how many crayons does a professional journalist need, anyhow?)

So there’s a joke in there were Percy sees Kaitlin go into the darkroom and then Kaitlin-2 walks in, and then also when he checks the darkroom, it’s empty.

Oh, so that means Kaitlin-2 successfully steals the contact disk, btw.

Back at Tao’s, Ryan has woken up and some how his backpack has, like, crawled down to see if he’s okay?  Which is helpful because that’s how he is able to quickly identify that on top of assault, there’s been a robbery.

I hope she doesn’t delete my save files

And this was the moment (right now, doing the caps) that I realized the little phones are called VRVTs!

But seriously, imagine being knocked out cold by a loved one, with no reason, no hint at an explanation, and not only has she left you for dead, she’s taken your phone so you can’t call for help.  He has no idea that she’s an evil clone!!!!  This is a real tragedy of a thing.  A gutting betrayal.

It looks like Ryan has his own contact disk, tho?  And he uses this on Tao’s PC to call up the Puhfessor.

spelled it rong

Just as a note, this subtitle comes up WAY too soon, so for a couple of frames it just looks like some kind of meme.  A++

 Ryan starts to relate his traumatic experience to the Puhfessor, but luckily he’s cut off with the good news that his “sensors” somehow correctly identify Ryan’s assailant as Kaitlin’s virtual double.

geez, you guys, look at how Ryan deflates hearing this.  I mean, it’s not great that he was probably concussed, but it’s a relief that his world still makes some kind of sense.

poor bb

Also, you can’t tell as much here, but there’s a really subtle punch in as the moment progresses, bringing us closer and making the moment more intimate as he grapples with this new information.  There’s a lot of dumb half-assed stuff in this show, but I gotta call attention to the stuff that is excellent for any era.

Also it’s so efficient from a time-management perspective.  Just look at the opening shot, which was a medium type establishing shot so you can picture Ryan in the space, but the PC’s right there for both the viewer and Ryan to reach.  Then we slowly zoom in, which serves double duty in that it provides the appropriate emotional impact, and at the end we’re on a nice close up of Ryan as he jumps into action.  Three shots with just one set up (and probably done in one take, with room to splice the PC shots in)!  I’m very pleased with this.

Down to brass tacks

The Puhfessor ominously tells him that they have their own troubles and we go straight from there into some source footage of them fighting some skugs and what I think is General Ivar.

After about three seconds of that, we cut back to the lab, where Ryan busts in on Kaitlin-2 just as she’s hacking up a storm.

im in ur base, haxxoring ur mainframez

Kaitlin-2 shows him the contact disk, which is now “encoded with a self-destruct program” that she’s going to use to overheat the lab’s power core and destroy like all the things.  Ryan is noticeably concerned, but Kaitlin-2 points the fissicator at him to get him to stay in line.

Ok ok ok ok so here’s where we get to the point where, when I watched this today, I fully turned away from whatever it was I was doing to go wwwwwwwwwwwwtf

Kaitlin-2 has a disk that will blow up the lab -- and there’s nothing Ryan can do to stop her--

huh

bruh what are you

bro srsly what

is happening

You’re trying to tell me that Ryan “killed his own clone with no ragrets” Steele is trying to make an emotional appeal to this clone in order to undermine her sense of purpose?

...did she ever think that Grimlord cared about her?  As a person?  I feel like that wasn’t in the contract when she was 3D printed with the sole purpose of serving her dark master, and she shouldn’t have any emotional reaction to this assumed expectation being challenged.

And .... did they ... did they read my other post?  The one about wanting to keep the clone around ..... ??????

what is happening right now

Ryan leans hard into this “embrace your humanity” tactic and has the Puhfessor show them a live feed of JB and Kaitlin’s fight.

“...She sure could use our help...”

wait for it

When she balks, he gives her one last over the top inspirational blurb that despite of whatever it was Grimlord did to her, she’s still the same (good) person as Kaitlin.

It starts to sink it.

(also just check out these sweet eyelines, you can tell that the screen they’re watching is slightly to his left,  sort of behind her to her right, which makes sense!)

He keeps at it.

Looks like it’s working?  She starts to reconsider her whole existence ...

...considers Kaitlin’s ...

... moment of truth ...

And it works!

BUT IT DOESN’T STOP THERE YOU GUYS

“NOW GO HELP HER” RYAN COMMANDS

AND

OMG

CLONE KAITLIN-2 IS ALL

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I guess, I mean, obviously Ryan’s evil clone did that whole thing where he stole Ryan’s virtualizer and started flying the Skybase, so if this Kaitlin is the same as the other Kaitlin then obviously she’d be able to do this, too.

But like!  She was the main villain until like four seconds ago, somebody who did Ryan dirty.  Just another of Grimlord’s nefarious tools of warfare.  And Ryan, a man who’s killed his own clone before, who took a beating from her only hours prior, is suddenly the bigger man who is capable of seeing past all that in order to turn an agent of his enemy.  And to go do his job, no less!

This has never happened before.  This show’s always been kill or be killed.  There’s a good reason for this, and we’ll get to that in one moment.

But I like to think Ryan learned from his mistake.  He didn’t even try to to connect to his evil clone.  He just got beat up and went back for revenge.  (I’m looking back at my caps for that episode, and it seems it was the Puhfessor’s idea to kill the evil clone, and maybe there was a MacGuffin reason why it was The Only Way, I forget.)  Maybe he thought long and hard about the repercussions of his actions -- maybe he thought that, had he been able to better understand his evil self, that maybe that shadow version of him would have liked to have been given the benefit of the doubt?

At the end of the day, I can think whatever I want.  But why we never get any other reformed villains until now is only because

It’s almost like they recycled footage from a different show(s) and just had to roll with the punches.

So then JB and the Kaitlins fight some skugs and there’s a big explosion and a lot of jumping.  JB and Kaitlin get caught up with the SparkNotes version of who tf extra Kaitlin is and then they fight Stingbot, teleport to a quarry, you know, all the everyday stuff.

Back at the lab, Ryan’s feverishly trying to undo Kaitlin-2′s handiwork and keep the core from melting down.  Can he do i-- well yes.  He can and he does do it.  Then he TROOPER TRANSFORMs away and ... flies off to fight ... some jets ... I guess? 

pew pew pew

In the quarry, JB is going toe to toe with Stingbot.  Stingbot has some cute little wasp drones that electrocute everyone.  They’re having a good time out there.

it’s super effective

Ryan shoots some more jets ... JB dislodges his wasp and slices one off a Kaitlin with a sword ... the third one just .. pops off on its own *shrug*

Stingbot shoots some acid (oh he did that before, too, in the basement, but it was irrelevant) which evaporates a boulder ... Kaitlin goes back to her battlefield quips but they’re not nearly as flirty as the last time ...

JB gets out his lightsaber and GOES TO TOWN on the remaining bad guys.  That thing makes the BEST wvungwvungwvung sounds, just btw.

And that’s it!

Almost.

Grimlord spends his obligatory seven seconds ruing the day he ever met a VR Trooper and swearing revenge.

ya it’s called being a parent

Turns out he still hopes that the two Kaitlins will destroy each other!  Very optimistic guy, our Grimlord.

Back at ol’ HQ, JB and the Kaitlins stroll in and explain the sitch to Jeb.  Kaitlin-2 seems fully reformed!

yee gurrl

But oh-hoho, does the Puhfessor HATE clones.

buzzkill, emphasis on kill

So it turns out, and I quote, “two Kaitlins cannot exist in the same reality.”  I guess technically she’s not a clone, but a virtual double from the mirrorverse/VR land, so that kind of makes some sort of sense.  This dimension is too small for the both of you!

The stakes are that if the two Kaitlins are not rejoined within 24 hours, both Kaitlins will byte the dust. 

Oh no!!

This was the point where, having a pretty good internal clock as well as a refined sense of story structure, I literally smirked at the screen thinking “soooooooo what.  you have like two minutes left and you’re gonna fix it in time for the credits.  overdramatic stakes are overdramatic.”

AND

THEN

THE

KICKER

OH-HOHO

I WAS

SO WRONG

SAME THO?1

:D

[rami-writes-blog]

Someone like... Me? - Part 4 (Fem reader x Rami Malek + Gwilym Lee)

Anger is just sad's bodyguard. You had to find out the hard way. Luckily you have people who care for you, maybe they don't say it out loud but actions speak louder than words. There are relationships growing and shattering, but maybe it isn't as obvious as you think it is. Nothing is only black and white. At some time you have to put away your pride, because it's much easier losing your pride over someone than losing someone over your pride. You love Rami, deeply. Rami loves you, dearly. You know that and others see that. Everyone tells a white lie sometimes and maybe sometimes it even is for the better. But will, those who think it's permissible to tell white lies, not soon grow colourblind? Wordcount: + 3,9 k Warning: none, fluff

-----------------------------------

I check my phone. Ugh. It's 4.53 pm already. I've been in here for over 45 minutes. I wonder how Rami reacted when he heard about my incident. Hmm... he does know, doesn't he? Yea he must've heard. Gwil was talking to someone. And he was very specific in saying that Rami was not welcome. Who was he talking to anyway? And why didn't he want Rami to come? Ok that one is not so hard to understand. I need to remind myself to finish that conversation later, I had with Gwil earlier.

The nurse startles me for a bit when she lets me know we're done. I thank both her and the doctor and walk out of the room. Suddenly I feel so dumb about what I did. That I just lost my temper like that. In front of someone. Gwil nonetheless. O my God facing him in a bit will be so embarrassing. Hmm.. I could sneak away through some side door.. Nah, I can't just bail on Gwil like that after what he did for me. Especially since he helped me and brought me here. When I walk through the big slide-doors, Gwil holding this helium balloon you always can buy in a hospital. And... Joe? So that's who he called earlier. Sigh, I'm so relieved.

With my most embarrassed smile I hold up my arm. ''well, good thing is It probably doesn't get any worse than this''. Joe starts laughing right away in a really (bad kind of) evil way, shaking his head. ''ohhh. Ohhhh No, no ,no. Look Amelia, that's where you're wrong. See.. it DOES get worse''. He walks to the counter and asks something to the nurse behind it, who then hands him something. With a bright smile he holds up a marker. ''Oh yeah. ME FIRST''. To: Amelia-Rocky-Balboa-L/N. From: Joseph ;-). It says.

Gwil starts laughing. ''Mate you know that's not how writing on a cast works right? It's not a postcard''. Joe rolls his eyes. ''Okay well how about this then?'' He draws something quick. ''JOE! NO WHAT THE HECK'' I growled to him. He's fakely wonder-struck. ''You drew a fucking dick on it'' I now say loude, so a few people turn around and some of them even start giggling.. ''You know I need to work in a few weeks right? I can't go to work with a dick on my cast''. Joe finds it very funny, laughing out loud and even Gwil can't hold in his laugh

''We also got you these. Thought it might cheer you up''' Gwil says as he gives me the balloons. ''Thank you so much guys, you really shouldn't have'', I say while giving them both a kiss on the cheek. ''Let's go. I'm hungry'', I say and they both agree. ''Starvation.. Oh starvation'' He says like he's quoting Shakespeare. And then continues ''IS UPON US ALL'' in a really dark tone. I can't help but burst into laughter. Goofball. As I'm walking in between the two of them, making my way outside, I stick my arm though theirs, walking arm in arm. ''you guys are the best, you know that right''. ''Oh. WE KNOW'' Joe says as he winks at me.

As we step outside I decide I first want to smoke a cigarette. I need it. ''Sorry'' I say apologizing to Gwil. He's not a fan of smoking, but I've been down to like 3 or 4 cigarettes a day so I'm really proud of myself. ''Okay well in that case I'm going to leak the lizard first'' and he's walks away. I'm making some small talk with Joe while Gwil's gone, when suddenly he says ''I thought Rami wasn't supposed to be here''. ''Well to be honest I know nothing, I think Gwil made that call, why?''.. He then points to the counter, where Rami is talking to a nurse. I see the nurse pointing towards us. When he turns around I see he's holding the biggest bouquet of flowers. I know I should still be mad but.. Him coming here, even though a man of nearly 6,5 feet tall told him not to, is just sweet. He comes walking in fast steps towards me and before I can even say a word he gives me a big hug. Not letting me go for another few seconds. ''Amy I'm so sorry – how are you? What did they say?'' I show him my arm. ''well there's a fracture in one of my knuckles, a hair fracture in one of the bones of the palm of the hand ... and I broke my wrist''. His gaze now turning very seriously and sad now. ''Please remind me to never pick a fight with this one'' Joe says while holding his hands before his chest, giving a signal that he's not looking for any problems.

''I don't know anything about that but – Joe told me you shouldn't supposed to be here?'' I ask him. I know Gwil told him this, since I overheard him saying it, but he clearly doesn't care. ''If he wants to kick my ass he can, he's not restraining me from you. I needed to see how you were doing and he's not going to stop me''. At that moment I see Gwil coming around the corner. When he sees Rami his eyes spit fire and his steps get larger. He walks up to Rami in a fast tempo ''I thought I made myself pretty clear didn't I?'', coming dangerously close to him. He kind of bows over him since he's well over half a foot taller than Rami. ''The only one who can tell me to stay clear is Amy'' he responds – both not planning on backing down. Joe and I roll our eyes at each other. ''Come on macho men, put your dicks in already'' Joe laughs. ''I have to agree you guys. There's no need in fighting''. They don't listen to me and still stand still facing each other as if their lives depend on it. Sigh. "As you all may know. I haven't eaten for TWO WHOLE HOURS''.. No response. ''So Joe and I will NOW go to McDonalds, before I die of starvation. Suit yourselves if you're coming or not'' and I put my arm in Joe's, together walking towards McDonald's. Rami and Gwil following us after a few seconds.

As we walk into McDonalds. I order myself A large menu and 2 burgers with it, being the food-addict I am. When I finished my meal, Joe's looking at me with his jaw dropped. ''Jezus Christ woman – Where do you leave it all? I can't even finish ONE large menu.'' ''Can I have it then?''. Everyone starts laughing but I'm dead serious ''What? I'm still hungry.. You guys are just pussies''. When I'm finally done I unbutton my jeans, bloating my belly. ''O my God. I can't anymore. Both Gwil and Joe lean over the table to take a look and they immediately were shook. ''This is so not normal, but I need to find me a woman like you. I dated this girl once who barely ate when she was with me. You just shove a meal for 3 man in, at once'' Joe says flabbergasted. In the corner of my eye I can see Rami's hand coming closer and the moment he touches me, an electric shock immediately races through my entire body. ''When are you due?''. ''Never'' I laugh. I look at him and for a moment our eyes lock, just staring at each other. His look so sincere and sweet. ''Get a room already you guys'' Joe says rolling his eyes. ''I don't want to interfere but. I really do think you guys need to talk things over guys. You clearly love each other. Pride comes before the fall''. I look at Joe with astonishment, ''how'd you get so grown up'' I ask him. He sips his Coca-Cola ''well, in case you forgot: I AM the dad of the group, aren't I?''. That's so true. How does he even know that?

''Let's go guys. I just want to lay on the couch to digest my food baby''. Gwil and Joe leave the booth first before Rami and I get out. Gwil and Joe walk up to Gwil's car. ''You guys mind if I ride with Rami? I think Joe had a legit point''. I confess ''I'll call you tonight I promise''. I give him a kiss on his cheek. ''Don't worry, if you hadn't noticed by now I'm perfectly capable of defending myself'' I laugh while showing him my casted arm. ''You better be the king of gentlemen to her or I'll find you'' he says to Rami, giving him a hug. I hug Joe, separating our ways.

As Rami and I make our way to his car, a few blocks down, we both don't say a word. Until he stops in his tracks suddenly, grabbing my hands ''thank you. For coming with me. I've missed you so much Amy and I want to make things right''. He brushes a stroke of my hair behind my ear, holding my jaw when coming close. He gaze locked in mine. ''Can I please –'' before he even finished his sentence I press my lips on his. His mouth opens a bit so I pull back. ''Not in the middle of the street, where paparazzi can see us''. He looks at me seriously, ''do you really think I care about that? Anyone who wants to watch, may know I love you'' he says and plants a small kiss on my forehead. ''Let's go home''. He wraps his arm around my waist and we walk towards the sunset, for a moment forgetting everything that has happened in the last two days. This man sets my soul on fire and I know they say you only fall in love once with someone.. But with him? I fall in love everytime I lay my eyes on him.

''Here we are'' he says while holding open his apartment door for me. If he asks me if I want something to drink, I think about me gaining confidence when I drink alcohol, so I decide to ask for a glass of wine. As he's pouring the glasses, my eyes fall on his bedroom. His bed is a made and next to it, on his night cabine, I see a photo frame. I walk over to take a closer look and to my amazement it has a picture of us two in it.

''You remember this?'' I ask him. It puts a huge smile on my face. He doesn't even look at me to know what I'm talking about. ''Yea, 3 months ago at my parents place, at their holiday home in Florida''. We're on the beach, in the distance. Me in his arms while he lifts me up, me reaching upwards in an attempt to kiss him. ''this honestly was one of the best moments of my life'' and I'm not lying. ''It was certainly one of the best moments, yes.'' He says. ''Not your best?''.. ''No'' he says. ''Then what is your best?'' I ask. He comes walking towards me with both the glasses of wine in his hands. He sits down besides me, handing me one glass he says ''the very moment I first laid eyes on you''. Normally people would, without a doubt, think it's a cheesy way to make up for his actions, kissing my but. But I know it's not. He's sincere.

As soon as he sees me blushing, he leans over my lap to put down the glasses on the night cabin and with that a whiff of his cologne reaches my nose. God, he's wearing my favorite. He bites his lower lip as our eyes lock. I scoot over an inch closer to him, our legs touch. His gaze never leaving mine. Before I know it his lips touch mine. Gentle at first but when he opens his mouth, as an invitation to make it more passionate, I gladly make use of it.

''We really shouldn't be doing this'' he whispers against my lips. ''I know'' I reply. It both doesn't stop us from doing it anyway. I decide to stand up and take place on the bed properly, tapping next to me as an invitation for him to come lay next to me. We make out a little more. We both want more but before it gets to that, he gets up and walks to the bathroom. I can hear him turning on the bath and rumble a little. When, after a while, he comes out to the bedroom again he's only wearing his boxers. I don't know why but, this man in only boxers, bare chest, bear feet.. It's such a turn-on.

''Come'' he says as he reaches out his hand for me to grab it. He takes me to the bathroom and when I enter it, it's all dark and there are all candles burning. I get undressed and get in the tub. When he takes of his underwear, it makes me blush once again. ''you have seen me naked lots of times'' he says with rolling his eyes with a smile on his face. ''well yeah but that doesn't mean it still can't make my blush''. He acrobatically gets in behind me, holding both glasses at the same time. I take one from him and when he finally sits down properly I lay down too, my head in between his neck and collarbone. We just sit here in silence, enjoying each others company. When I throw my head back and pout my lips to him, he plants a kiss on my lips. And another one. And another one. Until things get passionate again. Before I can even say anything he says ''No, I didn't bring my flashlight but it doesn't mean I can't poke you with it.'' God his smile is so beautiful.

His eyes turning darker with lust. When I'm about to turn around to face him I can see his phone light up, next to the tub. When I look at it, I see it's Lucy.

[3] Missed calls from 'Lucy' [2] Voicemails from 'Lucy' Textmessage from 'Lucy': 'U home alone or is Amelia with u tonight.. X'

I can’t fucking believe this.