#they are crazy btw they murdered millions

[silvixxen]

How we feeling tonite fellas!

[writteninlunarlight-years]

I need more platonic headcannons in my life; can you do some general headcannons for being friends with Charlie, Angel Dust, Alastor, and Rosie? (Separately BTW)

Charlie

Being friends with Charlie includes being down for her crazy ideas and schemes.

You are her third in command, the second being Vaggie, with whom you need to be friends.

You get to know all the details about all the hotel inhabitants. Charlie needs someone to spill the tea with who isn't her level-headed partner.

If you are single, she constantly sets you up on dates; she just wants you to have what she has.

However, if you are Aro or Ace, she stops and just finds more people for you to be friends with.

If you are super artistic, be prepared for her to ask for your help with a million things around the hotel.

If you are more left-brain and planning-oriented, she will definitely need your help making sure she shows up to her meetings on time.

She has a high standard of care for you. She is definitely texting three times a day to make sure you ate and are drinking water, friend.

She is a princess with a million and one things, thanks to her dad, so she loves spoiling you and Vaggie.

Friend dates are a must, whether at the hotel or not. She needs to decompress from her relationship, too.

Angel Dust

Clubbing every weekend and some weeknights. However, he will settle on sleepovers if clubbing isn't your style.

He only trusts you to help him when he is having a hard time with Val, so you two go on a lot of self-care dates.

When he can convince you to go to a club he is the ultimate let me hold your drink I trust no one else here.

You and he sit at the bar a lot and bother Husk. Between him flirting and you asking deranged questions, it is always a fun time.

Gives you the best flirting and dating tips, he may be a horn dog and porn star, but he is still a romantic at heart.

You two will 100% play dress up, it is one of his favorite pass times with you especially since a lot of Vel's clothes are meant for people with two arms.

He will not let you visit him at work, though he always comes and visits you. He is afraid that if Val saw you, he would try to trick you into working for him, too.

Teaches you how to pole dance if you are really curious; he thinks it's an excellent skill to have even if you aren't in the sex work industry.

If you choose to follow his lifestyle, he supports you wholeheartedly and even goes out of his way to help you find an ethical club or producer to work for so Val can't get his hands on you.

Alastor

He is a gentleman if you pass his vibe check and are allowed into his inner circle.

You two will go on hunts together if you like; if not, you are the first person he offers the cooked kill to.

Will try to convert you to cannibalism only a handful of times, if you like it you like it if not well damn.

He lets you help him script his broadcasts; however, he doesn't let you speak on them, so people won't come and target you.

Loves to help you ruffle Vaggie or Husk's feathers. Literally, his biggest enjoyment is making either one upset at whatever you two concocted.

Please help him annoy Lucifer; he will be your best friend for life.

You and he visit Rosie regularly to have tea dates and gossip about what is happening with all the other overlords.

He lets you help him clean up his murder weapons, sometimes its more fun to get your hands dirty than using the shadows all the time.

You and his central shadow talk constantly; this annoys him because you two goof off when he's trying to work.

You are the only person who he told about his wounds from Adam, and you help him clean up, best friend pact for life. You won't tell anyone how weak he was.

Rosie

She lets you help at the shop a lot, giving her more freedom and you more street credit.

She will stick up for you against Susan, even if you can handle yourself.

She shows you off to the other cannibals about how close of friends you two are.

She invites you to all her and Alastor's tea dates, enjoying the company of her best friends.

Like Charlie, she will try to find you a date, but only so she can kill them and eat them after they upset you.

Will also try to convert you to cannibalism; however, if you aren't in that crowd, she will happily take up cooking lessons with you.

Honestly, you two have a lot of cooking dates. I'm not gonna lie; you're teaching her how to cook regular food, and she teaches you how to cook other sinners.

She tells you all about her four dead husbands. She ensures you know all the juicy bits so you can hate on them together.

If she gets another husband, you will be the one to decide his fate 9/10. Rosie will come up to you and ask yes or no.

She teaches you all the weaknesses of a human so you can fare better in hell without her.

[liquidluckandstuff]

For the ask game : S A L U T (french for "hi" I amost wrote "cock" btw but it made me laugh so much I got embarrassed)

(for A : you pick! If you have a fun anecdote about one of your fic titles <3)

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

(I answered this one a little bit ago lol so copy + paste)

besides the corn prompts?

Voldemort being a total simp over Harry. Like feral obsessed. So enraptured he would sacrifice a death eater just to be in the same room with him.

Harry being forced to make a horcrux

Harry being remade into a horcrux or getting horcrux pt2

anything that focuses on their connection and codependencies

Parseltounge

A: How did you come up with the title to His Brave Boy?

Me and my beta came up with it. We came up with it first because I said it like.. once? I in the fic, and then went back and said it again and again because it was just so sweet.

One of my favorite things i've ever written but I know its not going to get very popular so I'm just kind of like :/ right now.

L: How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

Well, I edit over and over AS I write then I usually do a good hard edit once I finish so like... I don't know how to count that.

U : Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much.

Latley?

Evaleon70 - one of those situations where all that creativity was overflowing and when the damn finally broke its kick ass story after kickass story. @i-dream-of-libraries

Ghosty - this is gonna sound crazy but so many good drabbles on twitter that i adore (and im so irritated they don't post them on ao3 because BESTIE you're gonna lose them 😭 ) actually idk their ao3 yet but we are working on something 🌶️ together 👀

Leafiloaf - also writer? No. But who woudn't want to include them in a faves list? Their art is always on point and gives my brain a million different ideas and makes me want to drop current wip against my will to go write them. @leafiloaf

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

I kind of already answered this one again in another one so (copy+Paste)

Im going to answer this softly and not with the Hard corn topics.

Furry stuff freaks me out. Like life your best life, but the fur and animal features and behavior make me feel unwell. But omegaverse stuff where everyone looks human? I can get on that.

I think established relationship is something i can't do simply because i LOVE the build up and chase. I have a really hard time reading it.

Infidelity. Nope I would rather they murder their spouse than cheat.

The humiliation stuff. Like Harry being humiliated in front of death eaters? (especially with the corn/ voyerims stuff) it makes me so uncomfy.

[hinako-supremacy]

please tell us killer cupids lore PLLEEEAASSEEEEEEE

i usually just reveal and come up with little tidbits of lore in random kilelr cupif posts (sometimes having different versions and universes) but i will try to write down the most consistent. i may be forgetting some things though hehe

(btw the lore isnt really static, it can be kind of all over the place and inconsistent. and for the little tidbits just go through his tag)

here we go v

one fateful day somewhere in pennsylvania, madsion valentino was born into a very large family of criminals(secret style) and general weirdos, so yeah from the start he was gonna turn out weird. he spent his days reading fairy tales, folk tales and horror stories, and oh how he loved to dissect roadkill! he loved all things scary and all things lovey

in his younger years, he would be bullied a lot, by teachers and students alike, but also he'd beat the shit out of his bullies in blind rage (berserker style) and there would be one million horrors and living nightmare redacted trauma, and he would keep mostly to himself and read (haha, kind of like scarecrow). hed like animals better than people, seeing himself more as an animal, kind of like

a very creature guy

further on he would actually grow more interested in people then become fascinated by humans and love to study them!!! anatomy and anthropology and psychology, wonderful!!! dissect things always <33 study peoples reactions to things and their behaviors and the way they think (and hed get a little silly with it, a little terrorizing with it) hed also love history!! and research history of gotham. interest!!!! hed be in awe of the history of gotham and the architecture and all that

so. when he went to college to become a doctor, hed go to gotham university, since its like. right over there. and gotham!! interest!!!! (hes like with gotham the way i am with boston (GREAT MOLASSES FLOOD 💪💪💪)) so then he becomes a physician at arkham asylum cause hes like "ohoho i'll meet all SORTS of interesting people there." and thats where he meets jeremiah, and let me tell you, the second he meets this man its love at first sight. he wants to know all about him, become his bestie, put him under a microscope and all that. and jeremiah is so nice to him... madison finds him so kind... so.. interesting!!! and hes so cute when hes stressed!! want to give him a big smooch!!! and bite him and be with him forverv all time!! and keep him in his basement i mean what

madison always tries to find out everything he possibly can about jeremiah and get close to him. though he finds that jeremiah doesnt like to be asked about himself... but the scarecrow, one of the inmates hes very much grown to like, admires even, and become a bit of friends hehe, he used to be with jeremaih!! find out some things from him 🔍🔍🔍 and madison has definitely heard stories and done research about arkham itself and the family. each day his obsession grows more and more <3 start following him around and stealing from him

and with scarecrow, the two find they have so much in common, similar interests and things, two peas in a pod!! he finds he feels so comfortable around him.. so free... wiow! he can say batshit crazy things to this guy! he can BE batshit crazy with this guy!!!

some point, madison sees some rando that reminds him of jeremaih, he thinks "hey. what if i brutally murdered that guy. what if i cannibalized that guy while pretending he was jeremiab." (i got this idea from the first episodes of hannibal, yes. the whole "i killed them so i wouldnt kill you" thang) and so he does, and as he rips the heart out he has an idea "what if i mail this heart to jeremiah, how would he react? would he be horrified? i hope so." so he put it in one of those heart shaped boxes for chocolates and thehhrehes his valentine <3

also, how he became a werewolf: same reason gregor samsa became a bug, god said "why so creatureous?" and turned him into wolf becasue

[thesungod]

finally able to articulate what bothers me most about them calling an Apollo kid the sun and using him as the antithesis to darkness: APOLLO WASN'T EVEN THE ORIGINAL SUN GOD. he had a swan chariot and a silver bow but eventually people started conflating him with Helios bc they were both called Phoebus ("Shining") and one of Helios' epithets is Apollo's own name, "Apollon"- understood here to mean "destroyer". "Helios Apollon" was what they called the sun's destructive aspect. yes Apollo's name literally means "the destroyer" and i had to read a book arguing that Apollo (plague god famous for mass murder) and Hades are opposites and then go about trying to disprove the argument it made up

i mean, i love Rick’s world and Apollo is my number 1 character of all time but if there’s one thing we can say for sure is that he got somewhat nerfed.

making a scale of power basing ourselves on ancient greek texts is impossible, but if one sums up all of Apollo’s skills and abilities and domains, not to mention his influence and the width of his worship in Greece, he could be considered pretty much the most powerful god of Olympus except for Zeus. There’s a reason he, not Ares, takes the part of the rebellious son set to replace his father, in the myths.

in the pjo books he’s… powerful for sure, but manyyyyyy of his powers/domains aren’t even mentioned. the meaning of his name alone!!! and that’s fine, btw, we would have needed a book just for that. but it does make me a bit :(

with all that said, interpretations of mythology are varied and i was satisfied with rick’s vision overall. Apollo at his full power is still cool asf in ToA.

i agree with you about Will.

i don’t get why they leaned so much on the sunny side of Apollo and why they pretended so hard that he’s the god of Disney princesses and bunnies. I didn’t want Will to have plague powers or lean into his father’s deadly domains because whatever, not every character needs to be outstandingly powerful, but there was really no need to make him such a whimp😔

the sun thing was wayyyyy overdone. Will used to be all about healing but he barely even mentioned it in this book. he used to be decent at archery and that was gone too. again, i’m totally fine with Nico being a LOT more powerful than him, it was actually the outcome I had hoped for, but it’s kinda crazy for Nico to have so many fucking different skills and for Will to be so fixated on one when Apollo is the god of a million things and Hades is the god of… the dead. That’s it. If anything, Nico’s powers should be more stale, if that makes sense. Death isn’t really a concept known for its versatility.

(not saying Will should have been more powerful than Nico: having more skills doesn’t mean being more powerful, it all depends on what the skills are.)

[curseofthebloodcountess]

Session 21

All of my players were there last night! I think I horrified them all! We didn't get to the masquerade (which was my big anxiety - am I prepped enough?) because they got involved in local politics.

After Father Lucian admitted that it didn't surprise him that the party believed Lydia was an assassin, they convinced him to confess that the night Elizaveta disappeared, Lydia came to the church to tell him Veta had been "compromised" by Nikolai Wachter. Upon arrival, Lydia had blood on her dress. She said she had sent Veta to Immol in the dead of night - a death sentence, since Immol is even further away than Krezk or Barovia Village. Lucian didn't think it sounded like Nicky to "compromise" Elizaveta since the two of them were wildly in love and not-so-secretly hooking up (which he tried to say as delicately as possible with Theo, his own daughter, present). He said he didn't think Nikolai Sr. would have done anything but the next morning, he was announced dead and Fiona would not allow a church burial. He wasn't sure what to believe had happened that night and was horrified to think that the implications were that Lydia or Elizaveta killed Nikolai Sr. or that Lydia killed Elizaveta and/or Nikolai Sr. or that Elizaveta lost a baby (through miscarriage or abortion) that night or- a million things. The party reviewed the letters they copied down from Lydia's desk - both her letter to Fiona Wachter that was never sent before the Festival of the Blazing Sun and the cipher they discovered. Theo theorized two things: firstly that as a vigil (child of an angel), Lydia's charge to protect is Vargas Vallakovich; second that the cipher was not for Fiona at all, but rather for Elizaveta, asking her to come home. The party surmised that Lydia is planning some kind of murder/suicide to change the political tides in Vallaki and that her desire for a council, versus Vargas' desire for a council stem from different places. They set to work, trying to figure out who should be responsible for what task in Vallaki, staying up late to do so.

During the night, Ismark asked Theo to perform confession for him. He atoned for abandoning Barovia Village and for killing Alistor (even though they brought him back from the dead) because he never wanted to, he didn't want to kill people - least of all Alistor, who does crazy things (and who Ismark maybe is in love with) - except Theo told him during confession that she talks directly with the Morning Lord and he seems to be looking out for Alistor in particular, so Ismark shouldn't worry. Ismark worried... mostly about Theo. The two had a frantic conversation about how it's not normal for the gods to talk to you in your sleep and Theo swore him to secrecy. He is struggling with it but he is a man of his word.

Tam and Ireena hate everything about all of this, btw, They keep trying to make a break for it, which is kind of a hilarious running gag, since they are Sergei and Tatyana reincarnated. Of course the two of them want to get away from all of this all the time. They get no respite from it and when they do, it's with each other, which doesn't count because even though Ireena doesn't know it, Tam knows that Ireena too much resembles the love of his life from his life as Sergei. Poor kiddos. They just want a break.

Which meant Alistor was trying to figure out how to delegate tasks in Vallaki by himself for a while. Poor thing. Ismark tried to help him when he and Theo got back.

The party went to bed in the church. Before doing so, Theo reached out to the Morning Lord one more time. Percentile dice roll. 92. Contact was made. She told the Morning Lord that she and Godfrey were going to heal Stella Wachter together, that Ismark is worried about Alistor, and also that Nicky told her that his mother's "book club" believes Strahd is a prophet. Cue the most awkward conversation between a god and his warlock about how Strahd, despite being a genius and hot and "funny when she's not trying to be", is a lot of things and a divine being is not one of them. The Morning Lord seems to have a lot of personal feelings about Strahd but Theo took it in stride. Who doesn't feel that way about Strahd? The Morning Lord granted Theo inspiration before disconnecting. Theo did not insight check him. Spoiler (which my players are aware of): Alek Gwilym is the avatar of the Morning Lord and he has such complicated feelings about Strahd, his king, his queen, his commander, the mother of his children, and his murderer. He can't help but sympathize with Theo's crush on Strahd, while also insisting she's ten miles of bad road. It's funny until you really start to think about their doomed love story and how it impacts the party and the present state of Barovia.

Granted. Theo wasn't the only one to make contact with a god last session. We'll get there in a bit.

Theo and Lucian did not have a very successful church service. People are worried about the Petroviches. Are they ill? (Such a bad performance check, even with Lucian's help action). After Church, Vargas invited people to his first council meeting. Nikolai Wachter turned him down, but the party accepted. Tam tried not to. Tam really, really tried. He and Ireena sprinted from the church to get him a costume: a resplendent, red fox. While there, Hewin, an old friend and business partner of Tam's, told him he'd heard that he was joining the book club. He asked him to petition Lady Wachter on behalf of those who share her sympathies and faith, but who cannot afford to join political and religious movements these days. Tam agreed and because of this and one hell of a persuasion roll, Tam got his costume for two-thirds knocked off the price.

The party attended the council meeting, where Vargas' incompetence was on full display, while Lucian distracted Lydia. Vargas didn't know how to structure the council or what everyone wanted to do, voluntold people for positions, and only brought one piece of paper to take notes on.

That evening, the party (barring Ireena, who stayed at the Church, much to her restless chagrin, and joined Lucian and Lydia for dinner) went to the book club for cocktails, dinner, and religious services. None of them were familiar with the Lady of Shadows' religion, except what they learned from Patrina (that it is Ravenovia's place in the Barovian pantheon after ascending to godhood) and what they suspect from their dreams (she is not a good or kind goddess). However, the Lady of Shadows possessed Alistor on a failed wisdom roll and he was blessed with knowledge of the sacraments and prayers. He was forced to go along with the service. She even compelled him to join the petition circle, where minor miracles were performed, and to confess what he wanted to ask most from the goddess.

Unfortunately for Alistor, what he wants most from the Lady of Shadows is for her to leave him alone. He failed another wisdom save and suffered massive psychic damage, dropping him to his knees.

The Lady of Shadows then turned her attention to Tam, the reincarnation of her favored son, and he resisted her with ease.

Theo healed Alistor, Ismark rushed him out into the hall, and Tam spoke with Lady Wachter afterward to learn about a religion where blessings were bestowed, money appeared from nowhere, and defiance led to crippling psychic damage. Fiona Wachter spoke of how she views the Lady of Shadows as the Morning Lord's other half. One needs sorrow to feel joy, and darkness to appreciate light. If all one does is smile like an idiot, one quickly becomes an idiot. The Lady of Shadows has shown kindness to her family over the years and her prophet, Lady Strahd, has blessed the Wachters. She knows her prayers have been answered. She explained that the Lady of Shadows is the goddess, Lady Strahd is her prophet, and "those the countess deems worthy of love" are the saints. Unnerving for a party of Strahd's brother (reincarnated), son, and a flesh construct made to resemble Tatyana. The party left, most for the church. Ismark took Alistor to the bar, where they didn't talk about the cult meeting, drank, and went upstairs together...

and then Alistor went for a walk to Buckvhold manor to fuck Fiona's second-in-command, Rafael Buckhvold, because sex with a man from the cult whose goddess has walked with you all your life, usually against your will, is less terrifying than making love to the man who wants nothing more than to know you're all right. This is the second time Alistor has made this exact choice and the thousandth time Ismark has wondered why the hell he thought Vallaki would be a better place to take Ireena.

I think the whole party is wondering why the hell they thought Vallaki was ever a safe place.

The next day will be the Moonlight Masquerade: Vallaki's next, big festival. Everyone is certain nothing good can come from it. We'll see!

[sleevebuscemii]

I posted 6,498 times in 2022

That's 3,116 more posts than 2021!

417 posts created (6%)

6,081 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@commajade

@vympr

@cigz

@duovxq

@caramelmadeleine

I tagged 6,490 of my posts in 2022

#photo - 2,051 posts

#text - 1,253 posts

#k - 1,216 posts

#m - 425 posts

#art - 421 posts

#film - 357 posts

#word - 301 posts

#amc iwtv - 267 posts

#video - 252 posts

#got7 - 173 posts

Longest Tag: 130 characters

#if you’ve ever spam liked me these ❤️😘😍💕♥️💙💜💗🖤💛💖💞💚❣️💓😻🧡💘💝💌💟👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨👩‍❤️‍👩👨‍❤️‍👨🤍🤎🫀❤️‍🔥 are

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

got7 when asked how they managed to gain their name, work, and independence in what is the most successful transfer of intellectual property in kpop history and stay together as a band while still working on independent projects

499 notes - Posted May 26, 2022

#4

louis is never getting rid of lestat after this btw. as if lestat will think that all that — louis throwing a mardi gras murder ball that ends with him cradling lestat in his arms as he slits his throat with the same knife he was wielding when lestat first fell in love him only to then turn on claudia, refuse to kill him fully, and ensure he can come back — is anything less than the most fucked up romantic gesture of all time

956 notes - Posted November 7, 2022

#3

hollywood execs really spent millions of dollars on a production to find this out when i could’ve told them this for free

1,641 notes - Posted July 16, 2022

#2

crazy and insane how louis’ biggest lie and biggest tragedy was claudia. how he tells the story like it’s about him being in an abusive codependent relationship with lestat until claudia comes into his life and they manage to run away together. how he tells the story like it’s not about his romance with lestat but actually about his love for claudia. and how the culmination of that is them killing him together for each other and starting a life together. that is what louis is leading up to from the very start that is the point of his story and the core of it and it’s a lie. because he chooses lestat. because he turns on claudia and chooses lestat. how he positions himself as claudia’s greatest protector and advocate and that above all she was the most important thing to him and that’s all true!!! but what’s also true is that he chooses lestat and that’s his biggest shame and he’s trying to retell this story so he can come up with the ending he wishes for but this ‘nuanced version’ his ‘odyssey’ is a lie!!!! he can’t tell the truth because it’s too painful so he’s fabricating this idealized ‘nuanced’ version to make it bearable but he can’t escape it and that’s been the whole point and that’s the crux of louis’ entire being!!! everyone is right when they say louis is a tragedy is the tragedy of the story because he never escapes any of it. he chooses lestat and loses claudia he leaves lestat only to get with armand. it’s 2022 and he’s got a journalist in his concrete living room trying to fabricate a version of his life he can live with but it won’t work because it’s not real and all that’s real are his choices and his burdens and his trauma and everything he’s lost

1,658 notes - Posted November 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

another favorite thing about the batman (2022) dir. matt reeves is that when you first hear bruce’s batman voice it’s ridiculous because it sounds so normal and like he’s not even trying to hide his identity but then you hear bruce talk to people as himself and he sounds like this and realize his batman voice does work actually

9,308 notes - Posted April 19, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[creepypasta-comfort-place]

Creepypasta hc time!!

Pinkamena: takes a while for her to warm up to anyone, is totally a baking tiktoker with absolutely insane vibes, has 1 million plushies

EJ: barely talks, but when he does, he has a very childlike dialect, saying things like “i’m… hungry… need… food…” all the time, plays with Pinkamena’s plushies a lot, he obviously is intimidating af, but has a very soft side

Jeff: sends memes to literally everyone he knows, and each meme is as deranged as him, emo af, gives nicknames to everyone, a really chill dude, when he isn’t going absolutely insane, talks to corpses

Jason: he’s super into fashion, can be kinda yandere at times (sorta canon), will teach you how to make toys, if you want him to

Ben: a little gremlin boi, deadly curious, brings his friends to their favorite video game dimensions, replies to texts with either, infodumps, or one worded texts

Helen: tsundere boi, paints pictures for his crushes and friends, but will never show them, just an average struggling artist, but murderous, is epic transmasc

LJ: practically the only extrovert creepypasta, one braincell only, does insanely dangerous things to try to impress people he likes

Candy Pop: very chill most of the time, genuinely likes chilling with his friends, takes stunning selfies, actually makes weapons for his friends, and is kinda well known for it

Slendy: has lots of anxiety, the only responsible adult except Jane, says he doesn’t like animals, but all of the animal creepypastas are constantly seen cuddling him

Jane: draws a little, and writes goth poetry, likes anime, but barely interacts with fandoms, raging lesbian

Nina: tries to be helpful to other creeps, but usually fails, watches anime and plays video games with her friends (specifically romance sims, and yandere horror), loves alt music

Sally: is Jason’s little helper, will kill you if you don’t come to her sleepovers or tea parties, sneaks around a lot, because of her trauma induced anxiety, doesn’t talk much

Lazi: toootally has a crush on Sally, will end whoever hurts either of them, is a little cookie monster, is practically Sally and Pinkie’s shadow

The Rake: has very little social skills, is nervous around people he thinks are cool, doesn’t need to eat, but if someone makes food, he’ll eat it to please them

(This list will contain lesser known characters that I personally like btw)

Bubby the clown: lurks around the woods outside the creepypastas’ houses, doesn’t talk much, except to LJ, Candy, Pinkie, and Jason

Mr. Mix: cooks with Pinkie a lot, Pinkie thinks of him basically as a celebrity chef, and constantly tries to impress him

Clockwork: a total badass, Jane’s bff (or possibly gf), thinks of Toby as her little gremlin she has to take care of, is the irresponsible parent of the group

(Marble Hornets, cause they count ig)

Toby: anxious little guy, follows Ben, the other proxies, and Clocky everywhere, he really likes waffles, but not to a crazy extent

Masky: tries to be responsible, but no one really lets him do anything serious, the only proxy who cares about his work

Hoodie: steals other people’s hoodies constantly, sometimes finds disturbing surprises in the pockets… once accidentally locked himself in a shed, and was too anxious to ask for help, so he stayed there for a week until someone came around searching for him

(If you have any faves i left out, suggest more!!! Same with other fandoms!!!)

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 292: You Say Jeans

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “well anyway here’s that Touya reveal I foreshadowed like a million years ago, viva la 2020.” Dabi was all “hello world, I’ve killed 30 people and today I’m going to explain to you all why” before he proceeded to explain ABSOLUTELY NOTHING but everyone was so distracted by his tale of child abuse and hero conspiracies that they didn’t much seem to notice. Can’t Ya See-Kun’s Shark Friend was all “IS THIS THE END OF HERO SOCIETY AS WE KNOW IT”, and Horikoshi was all “STAY TUNED”, and then Dabi set himself on fire and leaped off of Machia’s back like the chaotic evil, I-just-bleached-all-my-brain-cells weird little fire man he is, ready to burn everyone to crispy bits before they could even react properly to his whole big revenge speech. Fortunately he did not succeed on account of THE RETURN OF THE JING, THE JOAT, BEST FUCKING JEANIST, back from the dead by popular demand in what critics are calling “the best fucking comeback since Jesus himself.”

Today on BnHA: Best Jeanist snatches up Machia and the rest of the League with his fiber steel cables before you can say “more like BEAST JEANIST amirite.” Dabi gets all worked up and lights Hadou on fire which is a real JERK MOVE, and is all “THIS RIGHT HERE IS ALSO ENDEAVOR’S FAULT”, which, NOT SUPER CONVINCED ON THAT, BUT OKAY. Anyway so then he burns up all the cables holding him which is crazeballs btw, and then he and Shouto start fighting, and so basically the whole thing is a literal hot mess and we’ll see how that goes. Meanwhile Tomura wakes up and summons some Noumus, and poor Jeanist has to deal with those on top of the still-attempting-to-rampage Gigantomachia, and everyone else is all “we can’t help you on account of we’re all half dead”, and so it’s looking really bad. And then -- and I can’t stress enough how much I don’t even have the faintest idea how to segue into this next part -- the chapter ends with Mirio!?! just sort of POPPING UP OUT OF THE GROUND all, “SURPRISE, BITCH”, and it literally was so surprising that I am still just kind of speechless. WELL-PLAYED, I GUESS, lol wtf.

lol okay so the first page in the RHA scan is just the “three musketeers” movie promo image that we all already saw a few days ago. but it does confirm that (a) it is indeed a movie, and (b) that it’s set for a summer 2021 release! how exciting

okay so now back to our special Dabi edition of Making a Murderer

“ray of hope” oh hell yes. SAVE US MR. JEANIST

I guess he had a TV in his private hero jet or something?

gotta say, “dammit Dabi” does not even remotely sound like Authentic Best Jeanist Dialogue to me though. gonna need Caleb to see to this. well but what do you guys think? does Best Jeanist curse?? I personally feel like he’s one of those guys who NEVER EVER swears no matter what, except under the most hilariously trifling circumstances. like he’s eating an avocado one day and he accidentally stains the cuffs of his beloved jostume green and he’s all “FUCK”

btw how fucking rich is Best Jeanist though that he has his own fucking plane? the thought just suddenly occurred to me, you know? like even Endeavor, whose agency has its own on-site luxury apartment suites for all of his interns, still drives around in a dinky little car that Bakugou has declared to be too small. which, I guess we know why he felt that way now, seeing as the guy he previously interned with apparently gets around in Jeans Force One

anyway so back to the part where Jeanist shows up to save the day!! YEAH JEANIST WOOOOO

ILU JEANIST YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST!! HUGS AND KISSES!!!

lmao we just saw Gigantomachia take out like a hundred guys not ten chapters ago. and Best Jeanist shows up and takes him down in like two seconds. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES LEAGUE OF VILLAINS. BET YOU’RE WISHING YOU’D TAKEN HIS QUIRK NOW, AFO. GET FUCKED YOU OLD SPUD

KACCHAN IS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM AWW

SIDE NOTE, IIDA, YOU AND I ARE GONNA HAVE WORDS LATER ABOUT YOU ACTUALLY AGREEING TO PUT HIM BACK DOWN. YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT THIS CHILD IS STILL DRIPPING BLOOD ALL OVER THE PLACE FROM HIS MULTIPLE STAB WOUNDS, RIGHT? WAY TO ASSERT YOUR AUTHORITY THERE. I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE CLASS PRESIDENT NOT THE CLASS CLOWN, COME ON NOW

LMAO DABI IS FRANTICALLY TRYING TO DO THE PLOT MATH

SHOULDA CHECKED MORE CLOSELY MY GOOD MARK. LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED THE “MADE IN CHINA” STICKER ON THE BOTTOM. YOU HAVE BEEN BAMBOOZLED. OR ACTUALLY, I GUESS THE MORE ACCURATE WORD HERE IS JAMBOOZLED, AHAHAHAHA. JEANS

HOLY SHIT DABI

I legit almost thought that was Tomura for a second. you two look so alike now with the white hair and the crazy eyes

meanwhile, Shouto is still crying and it’s a lot to take, you guys. lotta feels

ffff come on Jeanist you better do something awesome again here, the mood of the chapter is starting to slip now

YES, GOOD, THAT’LL WORK

WELL YOU TELL ME, SPINNER. I GUESS THAT MEANS BEST JEANIST IS OFFICIALLY THE STRONGEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES NOW. SORRY I DON’T MAKE THE RULES

ffff now Spinner is trying to wake Tomura back up. nah, how’s about we not do that

OH MY GOD HADOU YESSSS

MY GIRL OUT HERE WITH THE “NO THANK YOU” BOUT TO CURBSTOMP THE BIG BAD WITH HER QUIRK KSFHLKLK WHO HERE HAD “HADOU SAVES THE DAY” ON YOUR WAR ARC BINGO CARDS, YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!!

HEY!!!!

fucking son of a... fffkfkff... someone please reassure me that fire isn’t Hadou’s weakness. someone. anyone. also could someone please dial an ambulance and send them to Horikoshi’s house. but not just yet. first I’m gonna need you to wait about fifteen minutes or so while I take care of some things

well all right then, Dabi. so you wanna go on then and explain to us all how this, too, is somehow Endeavor’s fault?

oh I see, you’ve decided that since he’s responsible for “creating” you, everyone you hurt and kill is in truth really being hurt and killed by him! well now, that sure is convenient as fuck I guess

(ETA: that’s a nice effect with the panel sides getting all warped by Dabi’s quirk though, just noticed that.)

amazing how quickly you used up that sympathy card my guy. Shouto please kick his ass, I’m fucking done lol, you can all sort out the rest in therapy later

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE DIAL BACK DEKU’S EMPATHY STATS JUST A LITTLE BIT, HOLY --

“TODOROKI-KUN IS HURT THE MOST”, HE SAYS, WITH HIS ARM BONES SHATTERED INTO LITTLE TOOTHPICK-SIZED PIECES. I MEAN, HE’S PROBABLY TALKING MORE ABOUT MENTAL ANGUISH GIVEN THE CONTEXT HERE, BUT STILL. THAT’S ENOUGH HEROICS FROM YOU ALREADY FOR ONE DAY

NOOO JEANIST

LOTS OF SMOKE IN THE AIR RIGHT ABOUT NOW AND MY BOY’S STILL DOWN A LUNG. GOD DAMMIT

“if the number one suffers a total loss here, this country will fall to pieces” well okay, real talk though, I think the “country falling to pieces” part is pretty much unavoidable at this juncture. you all are just gonna have to try your best to pick up those pieces after the fact and see what you can do with them. if I were you I’d be less worried about the number one’s reputation and more concerned with the half-dozen child soldier interns who are still on the field and very much at risk of being burned to death should you suffer that “total loss.” please try to keep it together here for them

OH FOR FUCK’S

I really thought RockLockRock was gonna come into play here. USE YOUR QUIRK TO LOCK THE ROPES IN PLACE YOU DIP!! if he seriously just sits there and does nothing when his quirk could be the deciding factor I am cancelling his useless ass cute kid or no cute kid shfkjdls

(ETA: is he even there?? did he and Manual just hightail it out of there?? “well good luck, children.”)

also, we’ll put this aside for now to perhaps speculate about later, but what’s with Tomura remembering his dad’s house yet again in that far right panel?? and being itchy again?? I still have yet to fully work out the psychological mechanisms at work as far as his itchiness goes, so I’ll admit this is intriguing to me. it seemed like it was connected to his decay quirk, but then why is it acting up again now. what is this lol

yuh oh

forgot about these guys. looks like these heroes aren’t having such a fun time

oh fucksticks

excuse me ma’am but I don’t like this. you do know that my kids are all there, right. all burnt and impaled and broken-boned and the like. well except for Iida. he’s fine still. BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN I FEEL LIKE WATCHING HIM GET TORN APART BY FOUR HIGH ENDS, WTF

HORIKOSHI YOU MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD

god fucking... okay look. Horikoshi. you win, okay!? congratulations, you win, this is your show and we’re all just sitting here at your mercy. fine. go ahead and just kill off everyone ever, then!! what am I even gonna do about it. stop reading?? fuck

this whole thing really went from zero to fucked before I could even blink huh. I really thought this was gonna be a turning point chapter for the heroes. shows what I know I guess??

meanwhile this motherfucker is just SCREAMING

ngl, if I wasn’t currently terrified on account of things suddenly taking such a drastic turn for the worse, this would be the coolest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Jeanist my man, I hype you up like it’s my job because you are the greatest fucking meme character in the history of time, but make no mistake, you are also highkey WORTH ALL THE HYPE AND THEN SOME

seriously, though. don’t fucking mind him you guys, he’s just standing here in the coolest pose of all time taking on Gigantomachia all alone with one fucking lung because the substance pumping through his veins is COLD-BLOODED LIQUID DENIM, and DENIM FEELS NO FEAR

Best Jeanist really needs to get his own theme song. -- oh my god I just finally thought of a title for this post. lmao and it’s the dumbest thing. omg

MEANWHILE THE TODOROKI BROS ARE OFF IN THEIR OWN DRAMATIC LITTLE FIRE WORLD

which one do you think is the Mario and which is the Luigi. well, but I mean, Dabi clearly thinks that he’s the Luigi though and that’s why he’s so mad. nobody wants to be Luigi. what a life

THAT’S IT, SHOUTO!! POINT OUT ALL OF HIS HYPOCRITICAL BULLSHIT, I WANT ANSWERS

JUST TO CLARIFY, IT’S THAT NATSU, NOT SOME OTHER NATSU!! SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF!!

OH, WELL IN THAT CASE

BUT OF COURSE. THAT WOULD MAKE IT ALL WORTHWHILE, holy shit. okay I’m just gonna go ahead and say it, Dabi is a piece of work. I really thought this arc would make him more sympathetic at long last, but it seems like it’s doing just the opposite?? this is like an anti-redemption arc. I don’t relish the thought of venturing into the fandom tags once I finish reading this lol

(ETA: well folks, I’ve done it. and actually it was pretty interesting because there are apparently like ten different things that people are mad about, and so it’s like. each post is a new adventure lmao.)

so Shouto is all “BRUH HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST IT” and Dabi is all “YES”, basically? like, he says he’s completely lost his feeling for anything. omg. but you were so sweet. how does that even happen

“finally I can kill you” okay for real what the heck is your damage bro?? can we not. I like Shouto just the way he is, un-killed

oh shit and now the Noumus are here

cue Bakugou diving in to save his mentor, STAB WOUNDS BE DAMNED!! actually it would make more sense for it to be Iida, but if Kacchan is really fixin’ to go full Shounen Dumbass here then he might as well go all out, y’know

-- unless of course, Deku decides to activate another quirk??

“last I checked, the main character of this series was still me” OH? WELL I SUPPOSE THAT IS TRUE, SO PRAY TELL, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT LEFT UP YOUR SLEEVE YOU SUICIDAL BRUSSELS SPROUT

fucking love how he’s all “HAHAHA WITH MY NEW QUIRKS I CAN STILL DO STUPID SHIT EVEN WITH MY ARMS AND LEGS GROUND TO A FINE POWDER” btw. what can I say. Deku gonna Deku

FMMFHDKUHK W H A T

HOLY SHIT. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. WHAT THE WHAT. QUE THE FUCK

(ETA: okay look, all the love in the world to the brave scanlators who take time out of their lives to translate the leaks every week just so we can read the chapter a couple of days early like the addicts we are. that said, translating Mirio’s signature “POWER!!” -- which was already written in English in the original scan -- to “POG-CHAMP” is just a whole new level of wtfuckery from them lmao. is the Lida person back at it again?? amazing.)

MIRIO!?!?! SHOWS UP TO SAVE THE DAY?!?! POGS HIMSELF UP OUT THE GROUND TO BEAT THE NOUMUS LIKE IT AIN’T NO THING. JUST LIKE WE ALL PREDICTED!? I’M SORRY, DID YOU NOT SEE THAT COMING?? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOUR DAILY HOROSCOPE FROM ASTROLOGY DOT COM DIDN’T HAVE THAT ONE IN THE CARDS?? WAS IT NOT OBVIOUS?? TODOROKIS PLUS BEST JEANIST EQUALS MIRIO??

hot damn. Tintin really saw the writing on the wall with the impending Dabi Discourse and was all “NOT SO FAST” lmao. “HERE’S A BRAND NEW THING FOR YOU ALL TO DISCOURSE ABOUT” MIRIO YOU WILD CHILD. YOU GLORIOUS THUG

MEANWHILE LET’S NOT FORGET WHAT MIRIO HAVING HIS POWERS BACK ACTUALLY IMPLIES. HOLY SHIT. SUDDENLY WE CUT BACK TO ALL MIGHT’S OFFICE, ALL THE WAY BACK AT UA. ERI BRANDISHES HER TOKOYAMI-GIFTED BUSTER SWORD, A DETERMINED GLEAM IN HER EYE. “I HEARD YOU WERE TRYING TO HAVE A GIRL POWER ARC WITHOUT ME.” OH. MY. GOD

[bronwiebear-brad]

Giiiiirl! Listen this I know u only write about Bradleyboy but I see that u fancy the holland boys and haz 😏😏 (who doesn't right?) so pleaseeeee write something with them, pleaaaaaaaaase 🥺love you writing so much it would mean the world for me 💛

A/N: You all know that I cannot resist my sweet anon’s requests, so consider this an early christmas gift. Lmao. I hope your staying healthy. Btw I’ve choosen the most soft boy ever aka Harry Holland because that boy is lovely af - also this is my first time writing about the boys so pls be gentle 💛

Warnings: nothing much just a few curse words.

Spending quarentine and 24/7 trapped inside a house with the most loud, messy, cheeky boys ever wasn’t actually in your dream plans. Everyone got a part of their day busy, either was college, work, cooking, drinking, boys silly videogames challenges, boardgames and a lot of pranks. But apart from all that quarentine was making you guys build strong bonds.

You all tried to be active, productive and keep the days busy. But let me tell you this: that boys were always up to no good.

You were siting in the living room with your laptop in the coffee table and paying extreme attention to your zoom class. Harrison was in his, writing a few emails and you both were enjoying the quietness of the room while your teacher rambled about something important.

You totally missed Harry cheekily giggling and running into the living room, disappearing right after into the backyard. But little boy Tom definitely not gone unnoticed when he came shouting and shirtless, trying to catch his brother, making a quick appearence into your lecture since you had your camera and mic on the moment he passed behind you.

“HARRY! YOU’RE GONNA GET IT, YOU DICKHEAD!” Tom disapeared into the backyard door and Harrison looked at you trying his best not to laugh. You were looking at your classmates, with your face pale and widen eyes as you were noticing some of them laughing, freaking out and most importantly, your teacher had this serious unread expression on his face.

“That's it, I'm completely done”. You thought to yourself while smiling awkardly to the camera and thinking about million ways to murder Thomas freaking Holland.

"Wait, wasn't that dude, Spiderman?" Your teacher asked making Harrison and the rest of the class brust in laughter, meanwhile you grew red.

Apart from ruining zoom lectures, spending quality time with your bestfriends was the best thing. But most important, spending quality time with your very special friend Harry. Of course he didn’t knew he had a special place in you heart - and you meant to keep that way - but you two were very close and as the days went by it was more dificult to pretend that he didn’t make your stomach funny every morning when he came down and kissed your cheek, smelling heavenly with his sleepy eyes and messy curls.

Harrison was the mainly reason you've met Harry and the rest of the boys. It was during a summer break where you joined an workshop to learn more about the process of making movies and writing scripts. You didn't want to persue that professionally, but you needed exciting things to do on your summer break from high school so why not join a class to discuss movies?

You two got along right away after the teacher set you together to recreate a new ending for Titanic. You both did a comic approach, making everyone in the group laugh and even the teacher said that you were really a good duo. You had the writing skills and he had the acting. You were pretty unaware of Harrison’s truly intentions tho. But the minute he noticed your general interests about certain genres and cinema in general, the way you discuss the photography, scripts and plots even tho you didn’t understand very well about it and just by the way you stood in the theaters reading all the credits after a movie just ended. All of that simple things, reminded him of something. Or to be more precised, someone. That someone was nothing less than Harry Holland.

So he knew that he had to settle up you two, that you two would get along very well but Harrison wasn't going to force it, it had to happen naturally. That's why you started to hang out more with him. Going out to lunch or drink coffee, study sessions in the library, parties or movie sessions in his house and that eventually, gave you Tom.

Tom usually came with Harrison to the study sessions, studying his scrips and even joined the workshop at one point. Sadly he got off when he started working on the first big challenge in his career and all the Spiderman thing.

You three grew together and everyone started to getting in the right way of their lifes. Of course Tom knew his best friend's intentions from the start and decided to join the team of cupids.

It was needed one night at the pub, where you three were drinking and having a good time, to steping the plan to a whole another level.

"Guys, I'm going to quit the workshop." You said camly making Tom frown and Harrison almost spit his drink.

No no no, his plan didn't even started yet!! He thought.

"What? Why?!" Tom whined. After he had to quit it because his filming career, he was truly excited about his two best friends doing something similar to his job. He like the heated arguments and opinions about the films on movie nights, like you all had some sorta of film club.

"Did you got a boyfriend, is that it?" Harrison talked curious. "He doesn't let you hang with us?" He leaned on the tabled talking low as if he was saying a secret password.

"No Harrison, I'm still single. What the hell?" You chuckled and rolled your eyes.

This man and his obsession with my lofe life. You thought.

“I'm starting college and thats a big deal. I'm not going to have time to commit there, I only joined it as a hobby and it's been two years, guys." You smiled at them noticing their attention on you. "Also, I'm searching for a flat here, downtown before it all starts and I'm not finding anything." You simple explain frowning and taking a long sip on your drink and Tom's eyes lit up. He was proud of his flash thinking. Even if sometimes he wished he could just shut up and don’t say stupid things as his brothers would say to him.

"Move in with us, there's enough room there!" He let out excited. His eyes moved to Harrison and the blonde boy raised an eyebrow thinking further and understanding his best friend cheeky expression.

"Yeah, you could join us, darling. Real estate is a mess these days" Harrison smiled widely and your jaw dropped.

Are they serious right now?

"As if you knew about real estate." Tom rolled his eyes and Harrison playfully smacked his head.

"Uh-I-I don't know... You don't live there alone, what about the other guys? I don’t want to change the frat crazy house of yours.." You weren't sure if it was a good idea to move to a house without asking the other people who lived there.

"Oh you mean my brother Harry?" You nod after whatching Tom carefully. "He is super excited to met you, we’ve talk a lot about you". He simply let out making Harrison widen his blue eyes.Tom and his big mouth.

"Wait what?!" You asked being caught in surprise.

Three years later and there you were, standing in the kitchen, after Tom cooked dinner - by cooking you mean ordering - since it was your and Harry's turn to wash the dishes. As you washed the plates, he dried them with a white towel and was humming a song that was playing from his playlist. - swear that boy had a playlist for everything.

"Did you and Tom got your script thing sorted out yet?" You asked while passing a plate under the water. He stopped singing and listened to you carefully.

"Yeah, we are pretty far ahead. Moving to find a good plot. It's pretty hard" He answer grabbing the plate from your hands and noticing your eyes on his face, blushing slightly. "Don't tell Tom but I can give you the abstracts if you want to have a read? I know how much you love to read." He smiled and looked at your face properly. You were smiling widely and his heart softened finding your dimple extremely cute.

"Really?!" You sound so excited that he chuckled nodding.

"Of course. You're running out of books to read, I was planing on giving you one for Christmas but-" he continued driyng the plates but got caught in surprised when you kissed his cheek and said thanks. Seconds later he was right back in the kitchen after a short trip to the moon. "How's the online classes going?" He smiled, still blushing from your previous interaction, and looked at your face.

"It's going good." You stopped for a few seconds just admiring his face and the way his curls fell into his face lazily. He looked extremely cute in that green sweater. "I think my teacher fancies me more now. After the litle acident and knowing I share roof with spiderman, the dude." You said with a funny expression and you both laughed.

"Glad I could contribute on such achievements, miss." He bumped his shoulder into yours playfully. And you laughed even more. Your giggles filling the kitchen and besides the music playing on his playlist, Harry swore it was the most beautiful melodies he ever heard.

You two returned your attention to the sink and as you were doing it you got caugh in a Arctic Monkeys music playing and trying to remember the lyrics.

Click.

Your attention was brought back after hearing a camera and seeing a flash. Harry was still looking at you thru the lense with a lovely smile.

"Harry? Oh my god, no!" You blushed at his bold moves. "I'm looking horrible right now. Why did you take a picture?"

"Nonsense. You look so cute while doing the dishes." He turned the camera, showing you the picture and you blushed even more.

"Eww. Please, delete it." You warned and he chuckled putting the camera straps above his neck and resting the camera on his chest.

"I'm not going to delete it, love." He kept his task as you. "Sorry not sorry." He laughed maliciously and you rolled your eyes.

"You're going to delete it." You looked at him and he clicked his tongue.

"Uh-uh." He hummed moving his head negatively and his curls balanced up and down. That was a good sight.

"Oh yeah?" You raised and eyebrow asking one more time and didn't even gave him the time to turn your direction. Your hands already throwing him foam and he stepped back, foam hitting his hoodie and his chest.

He smirked but his hands went to his camera, inspection it.

"Oh shit, the camera." Your mouth making a "o" shape. "Im sorry H, I didn't thought about it." You pouted giving him the most apologetic smile and he pulled a poker face at you for a few minutes.

You were starting to believe that you actually broke the device but then he started to laugh hard.

"It's water proof, dummy." He showed you his tongue and hit you smoothly with the towel in your face.

"You absolute arse!" You thrown him more foam and after a peace threaten by his hands up, he finally stopped laughing. "Im serious now, delete the picture, carrot." You warned and he laughed at the nickname.

"I think I'm going to set it as my wallpaper." His words rolled out of his tongue so easily as he concentrate on drying the plates again and you didn't even moved from your spot, getting caught by his words.

"What?" You asked finally, studying his face and his eyes opened widely. "Harry why use my picture as your background?" You dried your hands.

Did I said that out loud? Damn it, Harry you fucking dick. He thought.

"Hmm..." He swallowed. "It's a really nice picture. You look rather pretty.... And I-uh kinda like you, I guess." His hands scratching his head and his blood stopping running thru his body. Well there wasn't no intention of hidden it now.

"Oh I'm so enjoying this." Tom said to Harrison, as they were siting across the room in the couch watching the whole scene in silence. You two didn't even noticed them spying.

"It's a romcom and we were the directors of it." Harrison joked and Tom chuckled.

"Thanks." You smiled and went to hug Harry. "You look rather pretty too." You said into his shoulder and earned a kind smile from him "Look." You were closer to him and your head moved back to look into his eyes properly, his hand traveled to your back and laid way to high for your liking. But it was Harry, and he was always so respectful that he didn't want to be sneaky or ruin the moment by placing his hands too down. You found that gesture so cute.

"I think I kinda like you, too." Your face got closer to his and his eyes closed feeling your hot breath hit his face. You stand there admiring his freckles for minutes.

"Do we have to move their heads too?" Harrison asked whispering. The duo was watching the scene unfold ahead of them with frowning expressions.

"Why aren't they kissing?" Tom dramatically pulled a face as if their plan came out totally wrong after all those years of dedication.

Harry started to dance slowly, his lashes clicked a few times and he opened his eyes. And you followed him. You both had silly smiles on your faces and after a long time of slowly dancing in his arms. He lean in, kissing you passionately. And you returned the kiss, like you meant to tell him that you loved him all along.

Continuously gags and whistles followed by an loud “FINALLY” from Harrison could be heard from the kitchen making Harry and you pull back from the kiss and stare at the boys. You both smiled and kissed again.

"Oh get a room you two!" Tuwaine shouted after entering the kitchen surprisingly and seeing you.

Despite that, you two didn't pulled back and Harry gave them the middle finger, covering your faces and the kiss with his hand, from the sneaky bastards across the room.

"We've created monsters" Tom's statement made everyone laugh.

[secret-engima]

It occurs to me that we have not thrown Tsuna!Noct at Dissidia yet. Does Xanxus end up going too? If Crowe doesn't end up there, how put out is she that she missed it? Does Tsuna end up bringing anyone home? Does Prompto embrace his inner Cloud when Tsuna goes missing in a no holds barred beatdown rampage with Crowe? :) I feel like this Dissidia would be even more chaotic than usual. Btw, does Ignis ever find out that Xanxus approves of him and why? I feel he would weirdly be touched.

Ooooo *rubs hands* Dissidia with a side of Flames. >:D

Tsunoct and Xanxus are the only ones called, only because I’m not sure ANYONE would survive dropping Crowe into an actual Arena World and being told to Go Nuts XD. Xanxus is pretty freaking annoyed by this. He was taking a well-deserved nap. Who are all these trash demanding he fight? Who is this Lady Trash that called him. Put him back Lady Trash.

Materia is professionally insulted by this Champion who insists on calling her Trash. She’s very confused on how she wound up with him. She was sure she called for a much more mild soul....

Xanxus ends up tagging along with the Kid Champions because they are Small Trash and they clearly need protecting (Onion Knight is insulted, tbh most everybody is insulted by Xanxus at this point).

Meanwhile one of the other groups get into a fight with Spiritus’s warriors and one of Materia’s Champions (let’s go with.... Cloud) spots a shadow in Sephiroth’s wake.

It’s a newcomer. He looks young, black hair and blue eyes and more modern leathers rather than old fantasy armor like so many of the others. He’s mostly not participating, just watching and trailing along in Sephiroth’s wake like a lost kitten. Cloud instantly assumes that this newcomer is Dangerous™, because Sephiroth doesn’t play well with weaklings.

Tsunoct just sighs when someone tries to pick a fight with him, because really? Are they really doing this? Also why did he get summoned by the guy with the blatant crazies?

 (Because while Xanxus is more aggressive, Tsunoct has always had this marvelous ability to take the usual Order of the world and break it into a million Chaotic pieces: see every instance he made the mafia world go Wait What ever, and that appealed to Spiritus, so he snatched him up before Materia could).

So eventually someone gets Noctis to actually fight and he ends up apologetically wiping the floor with all nearby opponents, and the feel of his magic attracts Xanxus, who is like “THERE YOU ARE SMALL TRASH I WAS LOOKING FOR YOU” and all the winded Materia Champions are like “you’re from the same world?”

“...Are we sure Materia and Spiritus didn’t swap champions by accident?” Someone quietly asks in the back as they observe the gentle-mannered Noctis talking to the foul-mouthed and scowling Xanxus.

Noctis ends up tagging along with Xanxus and people are even more convinced that Materia and Spiritus accidentally swapped champions the more they watch because Surely This Kid Isn’t A Bad Guy. Xanxus overhears them talking about this and starts cackling, because HE knows who Tsunoct is (Chaos Bringer, Change-Maker, King of the Underworld who turned a Throne of Bones and Blood into Justice and Protection) and he knows that Spiritus called exactly the right guy.

Xanxus and Sephiroth have a fight. It’s bloody, it’s fast, it’s violent, they end it with big, bloodthirsty grins. Tsunoct sighs at Xanxus meaningfully and Xanxus snaps “No. You’ve already got two of them, this one is my Cloud to court.” Sephiroth just looks bemused because he didn’t know courting involved trying to flay each other alive in a show of strength. Aren’t there supposed to be more roses involved? Xanxus asks sarcastically if Sephiroth WANTS any, to which Sephiroth actually chuckles. (Cloud chokes on his spit in the background).

Skipping forward a bit, when the whole World-Eater thing is figured out, it’s actually Tsuna who sweet-talks Spiritus’s champions into cooperating with the plan. He even ropes in the truly insane ones like Kefka with his smile and his words (and the LC version of Sky Charisma that he cranks up to fifteen thousand). One of Materia’s Champions accidentally wanders into range of Tsuna’s Sky Charisma while he’s doing this and since said Champion is not a crazed lunatic who needs all the persuasion possible to cooperate even a little bit, the Champion get’s instantly Sky Drunk and becomes as blank and pliant as a puppet. Cue Tsunoct flailing a bit and hurriedly leading the Champion back to Materia’s area and sitting with them until they wake up. Tsuna apologizes profusely and the other watching Champions ask what he even DID. Tsunoct just blushes and mumbles “I was asking nicely.”

Everyone looks at Xanxus, who they know by now is Noct’s half brother, and Xanxus gleefully informs them that “Small Trash” can use his magic to turn his charisma up to eleven. Half of Noct’s favorite servants in the Citadel are ASSASSINS who came there to KILL HIM until he batted his eyes at them and they became devoted.

All of Materia’s Champions process the fact that this young, endlessly polite and friendly prince apparently has MIND CONTROL POWERS that he uses to “ask” people to cooperate with him and suddenly they no longer doubt why he’s on Spiritus’s team.

Xanxus cackles at the looks on their faces. Tsunoct just sighs.

So the fight happens and it’s Epic and Xanxus, Tsunoct, and Sephiroth get into a three way competition on who can be the most terrifying during the battle. Xanxus wins but it’s a pretty close race.

Everyone gets returned home, Regis and Co are all a Panic over WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN. Then a moment later are like WHO IS THAT and Regis Despairs when Xanxus possessively slings an arm around the tall, scary-looking man with silver hair and slitted eyes and says “This is Sephiroth. He’s my Cloud now.”

Also in case anyone is wondering: yes, Crowe and Squalo absolutely went on a rampage when their princes went missing. Everyone was a Shock™ but Crowe and Squalo when little Prompto JOINED THEM.

Also also on your last question .... I don’t know? Probably not. Xanxus isn’t really the type to talk Feelings. But yeah if it ever came out, Ignis would be oddly touched and also proud that he got the approval of Noctis’s murderous old brother. XP

[onisiondrama]

He’s still uploading. He’s at 21 videos right now. I’m gunna stop with the full pics and just upload a pic of the videos I’m summarizing. 

BTW, you can find mirrors of the videos here.

PART 6 - Videos #11 & #12

one more

- He’s going to talk fast because he has to be somewhere. He needs to tell us things about Sarah so we could understand her more. This was protected by the NDA, but she broke it. She admitted to selling her own prescriptions. He told her if she continued he couldn’t have a relationship with her anymore. She said she tried cocaine. He thought that was crazy but looked past it. - They were in a weird zone where they were all together when she was an adult, then they weren’t because Kai didn’t want to. Sarah would get around it by having Greg lay next to her when they were in a room together and she would ask him to choke her. He says she would seem to get off on that. He keeps mentioning she was 18 1/2. - One time he and Sarah moved furniture together because she’s a strong woman. She got out of the passenger seat and sat in the middle where there was no seat. She put her head in his lap and faced his crotch. He says he didn’t know what to do and it was really weird. He has no idea why she did that. - He says she was acting like Greg was a bad person for not making out with her in the theater. He just wanted to watch Aladdin. That made him feel crappy and didn’t want to do things with her. - After they broke up, Greg slept in the garage because he was afraid she’d kill him because of her hostility. If you like her she’s you best buddy, but if you reject her she wants you dead. He says she told him she had BPD. She called her pills speed. She would be on and off the pills. He was scared for her condition. He was dead to her. Kai was happy they were on the same page. - He felt bad for rejecting Sarah so he offered to take her out to eat food. On the way home, Sarah accused Kai of smoking marijuana. He called Kai and Kai said he hotboxed, he was in the same room. Sarah unsuccessfully tried to ruin their relationship.  - When he took Sarah to the airport she cried and they hugged. She got his shirt all moist. He said sorry it didn’t work out but I do love you. I’m sorry this can’t be a thing. She said she just wanted to know what it was like to have a boyfriend. That triggered him because she wasn’t supposed to be there for him.  - He didn’t believe the person that told him Sarah said she would kill herself because she was in love with him, but things mashed up later on and it became a reality that she was only for Greg and only used Kai to get to him. - He says if Kai does go forward with leaving, he’s just going to be with a love doll. He plans on never dating or marrying again. Everyone who is mad at him right now, he broke up with them for lying, committing crimes and cheating. If they really had a problem with him they should have talked to him or dumped him. Nobody’s perfect. - People keep talking about kids, but there are no kids. There’s no crazy ring. All the events are encompassing and there are many witnesses. His family, their nanny, people he worked with. This because a crazy circus because he didn’t talk because Kai threatened to leave. The truth will set you free. - It’s not a crime to reject someone until they turn 18 1/2 and then not reject them anymore when they’re perusing you. He’s not legally related to this person in any way. - He’s been unfair to Kai and Kai is paying for his bad decision and he’s sorry.

just questions

- He has questions for Mr. Hansen. He tells Chris Hansen to answer these questions live. - “Where do you get your numbers?” He dated Billie when she was 19. He dated Sarah when she was 18 1/2. He dated Shiloh when she was 17 1/2 to 18 1/2. These were all legal. These are the only real relationships Chris covered on his show. Chris used to be someone who go after people who hurt children, like 12 year olds. With Greg, you’re talking about him dating a 17 1/2 year old when he was 24 (he was 25) and he broke up with her for cheating and having someone else’s baby. She was well within the legal range since she was Canadian and Greg was from Washington. She never crossed borders. When she was 18 they went to Washington.  - “What crack are you smoking?” This is the most bizarre and dumb thing he’s ever seen in his life. A 60 year old man obsessing over someone online who did nothing wrong. - Chris Hansen thought it was appropriate to show up at Greg’s house. One of the most psychotic things Greg’s ever seen in his life. Chris and six grown men, one of which went to court last year for sexual assault. You can see this if you look up that man. Why is Chris working with that man? - “What are you doing with all this money?” Chris can’t be paying the victims because that’s a conflict of interest. Greg says according to the news Chris Hansen is over $60,000 in dept to American Express and he was evicted from his home last year from a million dollar house. Chris is dating a woman 30 or 20 years younger than him. Chris likes to pretend he’s against an older men taking advantage of younger women, yet according to the news that’s what he is.  - “What is with your cameo?” Chris will tell anyone they’re a predator for $50. Where’s your integrity? You’re making a joke of your whole career. - Didn’t Chris lose his career because he showed up to someone’s house and they ended their life? Then he shows up at Greg’s house with his family inside “you disgusting freak.” According to the news, Chris’ show was sued and lost $100 million. What kind of nut job goes from one man ending his life and thinking he should still goes to people houses? Some people think Chris is a murderer. Who knows what that guy was going to do with what he was doing online. He didn’t show up at the house and he didn’t try to sleep with a minor of a young age, then he ended his life because of Chris. Instead of changing his career field to doing something where he doesn’t end people’s lives, he show up at Greg’s house and ignore three no trespassing signs. When you’re within 50 feet of those you’re trespassing. It’s a crime that could put you in jail for 90 days. “Didn’t think about that, did you?” Chris was in Greg’s driveway and the no trespassing signs were in the background. “What kind of moron ignored no trespassing signs?” - Says Chris is 60 years old and who knows why his wife left him. Chris isn’t an open book when he like to point fingers at everyone else. Chris got put in jail and there is a mugshot of him online. Chris told someone he’d pay them back and never did so they called the police. - Greg’s wondering all the money Chris Hansen is making off of victims is going. The victims are total frauds and clout chasers, he’s only ever dated three of them. Most of these people he’s never met. Chris is so stupid he never ran a background check to see if these people are clout chasers. What’s insane about Hansen is someone who is on his show who never met Greg is added to the list of accusers. - “What are people accusing me of? Sexual assault you said? When?” It makes no sense. Chris and his career are a joke. Chris is in dept up to his eyeballs and he’s using these people to make money to save whatever his career was. “Getting people to kill themselves job?” - Remember when Chris went to a state where entrapment wasn’t legal and he entrapped a bunch of people and they got to go free? Chris helped those people go free. Now they’re going to be super paranoid about being caught. Chris screwed up. Chris is the best friend of these guys perusing 12 year olds. You helped 20 people who are interested in children to get away with their crimes and he made someone end their own life. Greg can’t imagine what it’s like to be such a failure. - Greg is 34 so he has a good chance to get his life together. Chris is twice his age and this is his life? Chris is one of the biggest jokes Greg has ever seen in his life. - Greg didn’t answer the door for Chris because he has a family and when a creepy old man shows up to the house with a bunch of other creepy dudes dressed in dark colors, he doesn’t answer the door. He calls the police like a normal human being. - Chris would rather hang out with people who were taken to court for sex crimes. Chris fired Vince and Vince used Chris’ facebook and website to out him for allegedly paying someone to dox Greg. Chris seems like one of the most corrupt hypocritical people Greg has ever encountered. It’s amazing Chris is so old, you’d think he would have learned by now. - Greg offered Chris an opportunity to pay him $350,000 to go on his show. That fee is now $600,000 because Chris is the most pathetic disgrace of a journalist Greg has ever seen in his life. - The problem with Chris is he doesn’t know what journalistic integrity is. There is a thing called bias and leading questions. Greg was told that since Sarah was watching Greg since she was 12, that means she was somehow groomed since she was 12 when she was never groomed at all. - Chris doesn’t care about facts. Chris doesn’t care that Sarah tried to marry someone so they could get that green card, which isn’t legal, or that she admitted to doing cocaine or selling drugs. Chris doesn’t care Sarah repeatedly made statements about a laptop that make no sense because the laptop never belonged to Greg. The last person who it was used by doesn’t even live in this house. Additionally, the chain of command was the worst thing ever. It was allegedly sent to the police, then back to Sarah, then sent to Chris, then sent back to Sarah, and now it’s with the police again. That’s not even evidence. Wasn’t his laptop, last person who used it wasn’t Kai or himself, then it was sold to Sarah, then they passed it around. It’s bizarre Chris thinks something like that would hold up anywhere. Kai doesn’t even like porn. Greg never once caught Kai looking at anything. They base your whole case on a laptop that is dirtier and less credible than your career. - He doesn’t see where Chris is going with this. Chris can keep talking to people with no evidence, it’s a free country. He’s sitting here watching an old joke pretending to be a journalist and he’s watching people take him seriously and he’s wondering when the normal face will ware away and people will see the clown paint underneath. - If Chris could answer all those questions Greg would appreciate it. Greg thinks Chris should talk about how Chris’ whole life is in shambles and the only thing he has going for him is a bullshit case against a Youtuber and the worst thing Greg did was fuck an 18 year old. “Yikes bro.” - More videos coming. Wanted to give a shout out to the creepiest mother fucker to show up on his doorstep. How creepy is that for someone to fly across the country for someone to call the cops on you and the cops wait for you to leave?  - We’ll see what happens with the no trespassing thing because Chris and his whole crew did and that’s illegal. All y'all might be going to jail. That a real crime. You get arrested for REAL crimes. Greg doesn’t get arrested because he’s a former US Air Force cop.  - Greg doesn’t know what Chris is, but now you know who Greg is. He isn’t willing to lie down and take Chris’ horseshit so he could get more ad revenue and donations from people who have no clue what’s actually going on.  - “Just a little heads up.” Billie: dumped her because she lied and did illegal drugs. Shiloh: dumped her because she cheated on him and got pregnant with someone else’s baby. Sarah: Kicked her out of his life because she went crazy on him and he was uncomfortable with the illegal activities she was taking part in. Asks if there’s anyone else. Says Chris said there was 12. Greg says that’s a shitty case. Three people he broke up with over 8 years. “The fuck?”

[atopearth]

Tales of Crestoria Part 1 - Transgressors and Vision Orbs (Ch 1-2)

I haven't played a Tales game in soo long! I'm super hyped for this though, because seeing Luke and others in one game is so nice! Anyway, since it's a gacha mobile game, my bro and I legit rerolled for like a day to get 4 SSRs lmao. I also helped reroll for my other bro so that took agess loll. I ended up getting Kanata, Luke, Lloyd and Leon! Pretty okay hahaa. Time for the story! Honestly, when the villagers were accusing Nash for being the guy who pushed the old lady that ended up dying, I thought Nash was some troublemaker adult, but no, he's a kid loll! Like, uhh, just because he causes trouble every now and then doesn't mean he would do such a thing to an old lady, like what evidence do these crazy villagers have??? Lmao at Misella pretending to be weak so that Kanata will protect her. Aww, it's so cool how Milla and Velvet help you out! That's fun! I guess the game kinda integrates the other Tales game characters into the story minus the idea that they come from another world and instead kinda put them inside the story itself as if they all belong in this world? The idea of the enforcers is such a scary concept. The fact that all you need is lots of people to condemn someone and you could be "punished" to death is pretty nuts. Not to mention that most of these people that condemn others just see one-sided “evidence” through vision orbs (recordings) and then when enough people think you’re evil, enforcers will come and kill you? Like, what if they're innocent or something? No wonder why people call this Tales of Cancel Culture hahahha.

Awww, the CG of Kanata and Misella around flowers was so pretty! Loved it! Well, I knew Kanata's father was dodgy, but I actually find it funny he thinks that Kanata should understand and follow as his successor of human slave and organ trading lol. Like, um, do you never see your son? He's like the personification of naivety and justice, yeah right he would succeed your human trafficking business. It's not like he just sells them either, he sells all these orphan children's body parts and organs! Ridiculous that he thinks Kanata would be like sure, of course, please continue. I'm more surprised that Kanata rashly decided to kill his father like that though. Like, he just found out the truth and killed him! Not saying he didn't deserve it, but considering he admired his father for his whole life, I'm surprised he held no thoughts and feelings towards wanting him to be condemned instead of killing him like that. I guess he felt that he needed to in order to save Misella? Still rash though. Omg, Misella is even more rash and crazy, didn't think she'd burn down the whole shelter just to save Kanata who was being imprisoned by the conspirators of his dad who didn't want him going around telling people. Like, yes, she brought most people out but what if she missed someone or they got injured?? Anyway, the enforcers were surprisingly weak, now I guess if Cress (Kanata's teacher) kills someone, he could probably run too lol. Not gonna lie, all those anime scenes are so cool!! Wow, this game is pretty high quality! Loved it when Kanata got his blood sin (his sword that kinda represents his sin). Vicious is cool though, I love how whatever his attitude is, nice for him to have Kanata as a fellow transgressor friend. Anyway, um, I forgot to say that I'm surprised Misella just ditched Kanata when he told her to run away without him. Like, after all the she can't live without him blah blah and stuff, she just leaves him?? I guess at least she realised and changed her mind to look for him, but she hasn't found him yet so lolll.

It's kinda funny how Vicious is like Kanata's bandit teacher haha. Aegis and Leon seem pretty cool, I can understand them for wanting to catch Vicious and Kanata and how they would prioritise the innocent over capturing them. Anyway, wow, Nash is such a little shit. Honestly an ungrateful kid. I know he's grieving because his little sister died in the fire that everyone thinks Kanata lit when it was actually Misella (so I guess she's a murderer now too huh?), but it's honestly crazy bitter and petty for him to not tell anyone that Kanata killing his father was actually "understandable" because of the monster he was for selling kids and their organs. And like wth man, so Cody (Kanata's father) selling his orphanage friends isn't as bad as Kanata supposedly "killing" his sister? Seriously? Were they even your friends, Nash? You do realise that most if not all your friends that were sold probably died right? It's ridiculous that he wants everyone (enforcers and knights etc) to condemn and kill Kanata now when he never even tried to do that for his monster of a father even though he knew about his wrongdoings all this time. Ridiculous man. And like seriously, he just assumed like all the other villagers that Kanata lit the fire to cover up his murder, he didn't even ask him or anything. He just assumed it and accused him. It's like seriously kid, Kanata defended you in the beginning and believed in you, yet what do you do to repay him? Not even listen to his side of the story when he did that for you! Kids these days!

Wow, like I doubt Vicious could die so easily, but Misella is crazy, she just stabbed him through the heart to "save" Kanata from following down his evil path? Umm, I'm pretty sure you're not any better, Misella. Is there anyone around Kanata that isn't toxic?? Not that Kanata is any better since he's overly righteous in a silly way, but at least he's not crazy? Lol. Vicious is bad, but he never said he was a good person at least. Um, why does Misella think that by saying she manipulated Kanata into killing his father, it would make him not a criminal anymore? I think the fact he listened to some girl and killed his own father is even worse lol. And seriously, Kanata is a transgressor already, I doubt it's something you can revert, especially since he went against enforcers and even got the Stain of Guilt and the blood sin. There's honestly no point of her becoming a transgressor as well. And seriously, these villagers!! Do they believe anything and everything that people say? Use your own judgement seriously! Anyway, I honestly think that it's ironic how Misella wants to protect Kanata but causes so much trouble for him instead, sigh. Well, yep, Nash is pretty nuts to relish the fact that Misella is getting burned to death. Is there anyone in this game that isn't crazy?😔 I guess everything was for Misella to get a blood sin too~ Anyway, I guess now the true adventure begins? I love the ending scene to the first chapter, it really feels like the journey is just starting~

I think it's pretty nice how they addressed the idea of Kanata and them being happy whilst carrying the sins of killing people through Misella thinking that she needed to punish herself eating grass and stuff instead of the meat she likes because she "deserves" that. Obviously they shouldn't be complacent and think it's fine to kill people, but I agree with Vicious, they've already chosen to continue to live despite how painful it may be and despite how much others want them to die, so there isn't any harm in them living "normally" because that's the path they've chosen to follow now. Lmao at Misella being traumatised by Kanata's food though haha. Vicious is so funny and cool, such a silly but fun guy. Reid is a great guy, I love how he thinks that one's own impressions are worth more than what other people think. I think it's important to make your own judgement about what kind of person someone is rather than relying on stuff like rumours and stuff, although it's understandable if you do follow others, since really, they are criminals. Btw, an extra plus is that Reid is voiced by Ishida Akira!! Yes, I love Athrun Zala (Gundam Seed) and Kent (Amnesia:Memories) to name a few hahaha. HAHAHA, I love how Vicious just trashed Misella's hopes that she was special to Kanata when she asked him if he would risk his life like Veigue to get a bloodstone to save her if she was ill like Veigue's friend, and he says of course, and then Vicious asks Kanata the same thing and he says he'll save him too loll. Misella using Vicious as a scapegoat to take all the blame for injuring a kid was lol, but seriously, these adults are so childish and reliant on the vision crystals to solve all their problems. It's like wow, Veigue looks like a mean and bad person so yep it must have been him is just ridiculous, I'm so glad Reid isn't insane like them. At this point, I’m just glad there are sensible people in this story like Reid and Veigue lol.

Overall, my impression for now is pretty positive. The story isn’t great, but I do enjoy the dubiousness of everything including the main characters. The animated scenes are awesome though and the design and everything is so pretty! Aside from the bugs that are rampant (random crashing etc) throughout the game, I’ve still been quite obsessed with it that I’m playing everyday hahaha. Now if only the gleamstone draws could guarantee an SSR instead of an SR lolll. Not that I’m complaining too much I guess since I got all the summer SSRs (because Veigue and Yuri were hot, so I needed them LOL) . The game can get rather grindy though with the different materials you need and how low the drop rates can be, but it’s not too bad to get to level 80 for your characters at least. Just wanted to say, I’m happy to finally have 3-4 level 100s yay! It’s nice to see a turn-based Tales game that still relies on combos to do the best damage haha. Otherwise, if you’re wanting to try this game, this is probably a great time to do it since you get an extra 2500 gleamstones with the 1 million downloads reward right now, so you now have 4 chances to draw SSRs! (One guaranteed SSR draw, one normal gleamstones draw, the SR+ tickets draw and the normal summon tickets draw) Just keep in mind that gacha is gacha and sometimes RNG is just not on your side. For example, my bro used 15k gleamstones and got 0 SSRs, so yes, the game can get painful and depressing, but I’m here for the story so at least I’m all good haha!

[holylangdon]

Dealing With The Devil (Michael Langdon x Reader)

Request: “I would die for a story about Michael interviewing the reader and she turns out to be a hella powerful witch and because of their shared power they like fall in love or some shit😂 yeah I’m cheesy I know” - Anon

“I would love a story where Michel is interviewing you and find your a witch who practices black magick. Him and the reader fall for each other and do like a ritual together or something that would be amazing” - Anon

“Would you consider writing a MichaelxReader smut with a blood kink. Last nights episode made me thirsty for it. Love your wringing btw” - Anon

Warnings: Witch!Reader, dark magic, light nsfw, blood, knife play, slightly off request, Y/H/T is your hometown, 

Word Count: 1.2k

A/N: I wrote this at 3am, exhausted. It’s such a mess but I actually kind of love it

Special genetics. Unique DNA. 

The thought felt incomplete, like there was some part of the equation missing. You were hand-picked to survive, out of the billions and billions of people in the world, to live in what you presumed was a government-ran underground bunker for the wealthy. And unique, as you had earlier learned.

There were three of you. Emily, Timothy, Y/N. None of you had known each other before the blast. None of you were even from the same town, not event the same state. This mysterious Cooperative was your only connecting factor. 

But somehow, the three of you were allegedly most genetically fit to survive this nuclear Armageddon. And with the many, many empty hours you now had on your hands, you had begun to think about what made you special. Your theories were across the board with insanity, but none of them worked. 

Were you immune to radiation? No, they had still scanned and cleansed you when you were sent to the Outpost. They were still concerned with you being an exposure risk. 

Could they be lying? Were you really just like everyone else, nothing special about you? You doubted it. Once again, Out of so many people, why had they chosen you? 

Was it because of your secret? If so, how long until they found out? How long until they weaponized you? How did they find out? 

Your magic was the only thing you had never told anyone. Not your friends, not your boyfriend. Not your family. You had heard the stories from your crazy bat of a great grandmother about the “special blood” that ran in your veins, but none of the stories were believable until you were a teenager. When you began to come into your abilities, she was the one to teach you to hide them. Not suppress them, not to shove them away into a deep dark closet inside your mind like your mother would’ve. But to keep them safe, and to keep yourself safe. 

Pyrokenesis was your favorite. The ability to conjure fire out of nothingness. Divination, transmutation, vitalum vitalis, concilium. You were considered an extremely gifted little witch, especially with your family trait: psychometry. You were able to discover intimate knowledge about a person, their innermost desires and wishes and things they want nothing more than to keep a secret, from simply touching them. 

You had been taken from your Tuesday lecture at your college. The quiet, calm, and bored atmosphere was disrupted as the two armored figures entered the classroom, making their way to your seat. Time moved in slow motion as they took you by the arm and led you outside, pushing your best friend and professor away as they tried to defend you. You didn’t even know if they were injured as one of the taller figured lunged forward to attack. Your knees gave in as they tugged you away, shoving you uncomfortably into a dark truck and driving away with a quickness.

Then, you were put in a holding facility. That’s where you met Emily and Timothy. You had been placed with her, Timothy above you in a large, metal cell. It was cold and dark and quiet, almost eerily so. But you weren’t scared. What could be worse than the end of the world? A murderer? You laughed at the thought. 

Neither of them knew anything more than what you did. It felt like a bad Netflix horror movie that you and your boyfriend would’ve enjoyed watching and laughing at, making fun of the dumb girl who didn't even fight back. But the tables had turned, and you had realized you were the dumb girl who didn't even fight back. 

The trio of you wasn’t there long. After an alarm rang out and the building shook from another ICBM, you were shoved into a hazmat suit and pushed around into the back of a small van. They drove for what felt like days before arriving here, at the Outpost, where you were checked for radiation and introduced to the crowd. 

You scanned over the story for any small detail you might've missed, just like you'd done a million times before. That’s what you were good at. That’s what you were in school for. Business. It was your job to analyze every little detail and poke holes in everything you could find. It was odd, the thought of you being here forever. Or going to the Sanctuary. Or dying. Each option was just as likely as the next.

Langdon from the Cooperative had already conducted your interview. He told you the absolute most basic things you needed to know. That he would know if you lied, he would know if you omitted any little detail, that he would know. His tone was intimidating yet warm as he spoke to you, his fingers drawing your attention as they drummed against the table lightly. You barely listened to him, watching the light glimmer off of his dark rings instead. 

“We’re very alike, you know.” 

That snapped you from your thoughts. Where was he going with this?

“I can feel the darkness that radiates off of you.” He leaned forward. “So tell me, who are you, Y/N?” You opened your mouth to speak, but he shushed you. “Tut, tut, tut, don’t lie to me.”

“I’m Y/N Y/L/N from Y/H/T. Grew up in a perfect little family in the suburbs. Nothing special about me, Mr. Langdon.” You snickered behind your hand as he glared at you, annoyance clear in his eyes. “Is that what you want to know?”

He stood from his seat, slowly walking towards you. His body was relaxed as he let his fingers drag against the wooden desk. You watched his every move with anticipation. He gestured for you to rise. You complied.

You were shocked let find a slight moan escape your lips as he pressed you against the cement wall, the taller man standing over you. You almost feared him as his icy blue eyes stared into yours, turning submissive under his touch. 

“Let’s find out, shall we?” His rough voice sent a chill down your spine as you suddenly felt a cold, sharp metal press against your clavicle. He trailed his knife across your chest, stopping just above your breast. He pressed harder. “Unless you’ve had a change of heart?” 

“Go ahead.” You whispered. He watched you carefully, the way your eyes glimmered as you squirmed underneath him. Little did you know, he thrived on that. The fierceness of your words, the way you urged him on. He liked knowing that you almost liked what he was doing to you. A sly smile crossed his face.

You gasped as he drew blood from you. It was a small cut, but the crimson liquid seeped out faster than you could register, feeling the warmth from the cut spread across you. He licked it from your shoulder, savoring the taste.

“You taste,” He paused himself, thinking about the right word to say. “Saccharine. Dark magic runs through you.”

“Yeah?” You asked, closing your eyes. You felt him suck against your collarbone, pulling more into his mouth. 

It was mere seconds before his lips were pressed against yours, the bitter taste of yourself on his lips. The kiss was heated, passionate as his hands glided down your waist. He slipped the knife into your hand, clasping it around the handle. 

He pulled away, wiping your blood from his lips onto his sleeve. “You might need that, little witch. I can’t have anything bad happening to you.” 

And with that, he sent you on your way. 

[t-underneaththeradardancing]

watta day that wuz

oh oh who coulda asked for more  (d byrne)

it was - what it was - wattit iz - sometimes things just b like that - they fucking do 

theres a million ways (d b aggin)

so imma try not to trigger 2 much k - but feelz free to skip to the good part - fuck ( it aint poetry w/o a fuck)  herez the preview - u can just scroll and ignore until - birdsong - then again u gonna miss the kitty pome contained in everything - and she IS a good one let me tell u a story 

soze a cupple daze past since starting this - gave a couple details enough - we gonna poet like an og - i met 1 in the hospital btw - we scene each other round for years never met 

it starts w the kitty and u know she is a good one - early past midnight fri -dont like the way im breathing - thot i might havva cold - took it ezier than usual - had a guitar 2 check out thurs  but decided to delay to fri - had considered taking my prn prednisone - it had been awhile so it was safe - cinder insisted - believe it or dont  - slept well til 430 leg cramp awaken - so we start out early the bird - chill af i thinkin but that jest goes to show wtf iknow 

feed a crow fam - mail some checks i been meening 2 - meet liam at guitar center - it raining on and off - warm inside - we play and hang for hours - i have a new guitar - at some point im 2 warm way much too - take off several layers - then outside for a minute - cold air hit i lose my breath it happens nbd 

we trynna grab a bite for lunchdinner didnt really hava breakfast - find i cant eat - the excitement i sez - new guitar is a feather - but 2 heavy 4 me to carry walkin - been invited to liams band practice - ppl i love havent scene since  b4 the incident on my bday - ifn u dont no bout it its prob best - it was bad to bone and evil psycho drama - apprehensive bout how they feeling 

kool af and the gang celebrating the rehearsal - itz too warm inside - 40 and windy outside - i step out walk down steps and double over - know imma trouble man like marvin but not on top - stagger back inside barely breathing - liam , 911 i sez - srs  - there starts 2 b discussion but he dont fuck around he dialing  - imma panic - ppl trynna touch me comfort and it making it wurse n crazy 

 so albuterol and 02 and ambulance and ER sum kinda injection im not  even asking wat - can i hold still while they put a port in - yah do wat u hafta and tell me when itz my turn -  er almost release me - been thru this when the un had wurser asthma - peace o cakewalk - maybe better we admit u and c how u doin in the morning - ok - un know i havent really eaten in 24 hour - they promise a sandwich - i never get it - it goes badly from there - 5 insane nite and daze - headfonz appear - crows in the evening carry me past that night despairing to the other side cuz if i leave my body 4 a minute i aint coming back this time - 5 flights up no open windows i hear birdsong prayer in the morning - i turn my fone on and look at heartz on tumblr - when im coherent - tho always able to follow clear medical instruction 

when i home - my murder duz a flyby 

i always been lucky like that 

i should b dead a couple x over scrambled hard 

the myriad forms of love and god - 4 lack of a better word 

kept me alive 

oh yah 

there wuz fucking evil feeding offa fear and pain 

love is stronger

[antiterf]

(This may have a lot of parts so sorry in advance). So, I don't know if you've seen it around (I'm not trying to sound full of myself but it blew up much to my annoyance) but I have a post that says "Advocating for the murder of trans women means you're not a feminist" or something very similar which is, by the way, 100% true. I stand by the fact that if you exclude women from your feminism, you don't care about all women and therefore aren't a feminist. But you know, TERFs exist.

And so, I got all these replies because I tagged it radfem, TERF, etc because they apply, not for intentional discourse (contrary to popular belief, apparently), including, but certainly not limited to, some dumb, self-righteous bitch (no offense, but I don’t think that’s a slur since it’s not exclusively used against women anymore [or at least, I don’t use it like that and the only people who complain are misandrist TERFs so it’s fun to call them that to piss them off]).

She said, and this happened like yesterday and the post was made about two months ago, “It’s immature to say you’re right with no evidence (I have cited plenty of evidence btw) and not to listen to others opinions” because I reblogged my own post EXPLICITLY STATING the point was not up for debate. Look, if you think that advocating for the murder and exclusion of your fellow women is just a “different opinion” and not downright violent and harmful, boy have I got some news for you

My favorite, though, was the fact that people seem to be obsessed with genitals! Like, the main dumbass argument (as if any of them aren’t dumb) is that they’re not female and like, not even that, but anyone who is female must have a working reproductive system! And that’s so crazy!!! Like, all logic also excludes a lot of cis women and it’s the funniest shit I’ve ever seen. This is the end of this story but you might get updates because that post gets so much hilariously ignorant bullshit.

(I’m just gonna make comments in no particular order with the story if you don’t mind)

The number one rule of Tumblr, expect discourse. You talk about terfs? Discourse. You talk about how gay you are? Discourse. You go onto bottommemes on Christmas Eve? Discourse. You bring up that banana that you found in the middle of the road? Discourse. 

Why don’t you (mentions to do a thing that you already did they just don’t care about your argument at all)

About the bringing up genitals thing, I find it annoying whenever anything involves trans people it has to be taken back to “but a trans woman isn’t a woman” and vice versa. Really? we’re going back to this debate that has been given at least a million times on this website alone? How is discourse at all worth it if you’re just repeating the same argument again and again? Like honestly after a while of seeing the same thing I just kind of glaze over it and don’t bother. 

“A working reproductive system” I guess that one family member that I’m not even going to specify because she would be self-conscious about it isn’t a woman then… Thank God that trans men can be considered men at one point in transition.

Honestly, I saw bitch as just a swear word for the longest time (because I saw it used on both men and women too) but then I decided that it was more of a slur when I realized that it more triggers fear when men use it on women. So yeah I chose not to use it.