#they are both kinky af and you can’t tell me otherwise

[tulipatook]

Before I proceed onto episode 3 later today I just need to reiterate once more that I still haven’t fully recovered from Crowley tempting Aziraphale with food. That scene was erotic af! Crowley’s eyes gleaming with anticipation as Aziraphale takes his first bite, and then leaning back to watch as the angel proceeds to stuff his face, that did things to me. I mean I had my own thoughts about the various scenes of Crowley watching Aziraphale eat in season 1 (and I am frankly surprised about how many seem to have caught on to it only now that we saw the temptation happen because it was so obvious to me?) Anyway, kinky headcanon confirmed and I couldn’t love it any more!

[ncityofangels]

Monsta X Reaction - Seeing Their S/O in Lingerie

a/n: This was kind of a spur of the moment thing so hopefully it turns out good and you guys enjoy it. :) 

Genre : smuttyyyy. goes a little bit into all the diddly doo

Requested - No, I just thought it’d be fun <3

Shownu

lol this boy would get kinda nervous at first

yeah y’all are dating and everything

so hes definitely used to seein you naked ;)

BUT

seeing you in your new lace bodysuit just got him going

Once he feels his dick growing it’s go time (ew im literally the cringey-est person I know, I promise I’m a decent writer)

I highkey see Shownu as a soft dom

Don’t really think he’s too kinky in the bedroom

but he’s definitely into anything that enhances your appearance

Tries to keep himself from launching himself at you tbh

“When did you get that?”

“Why do you make me feel this way, y/n?”

Wonho

oOp

so

we all been knew that Wonho has a daddy kink

when you first walk into the bedroom, his mood INSTANTLY changes

hard dom energy tbh, but that’s a whole other reaction

why do I feel like he’d be a huge tease though

like first reaction would definitely be for him to throw you on the bed and make you wish you never teased him like this

but once he regains control of himself he just sits on the bed acting like he doesn’t even acknowledge you

can’t deny that you look AMAZING in your new matching bra and underwear

still makes you work for it

“Did you need anything?”

“You’re gonna regret behaving like this babygirl.”

Minhyuk

baby boyyy

gets all smiley and nervous when he sees you

probably compliments you a lot

big switchh

depends on what kind of mood hes in on how he reacts

definitely more of a Shownu dom in my opinion

if he’s subbing for the night I see him being a little bit kinkier

like handcuffs, overstimulation, the works

wow I did not mean to be this detailed but here we are

when he sees you in your new bustier he can’t shy away from the sensation of blood rushing to his lower parts

“Come here and let me take that off of you”

“I’ll go get the handcuffs”

Kihyun

similar to Wonho in my opinion (probably just because he’s one of my biases) 

not really into the whole daddy thing

needy af when hes in the mood

the atmosphere of the room instantly changes when he sees you in your new garters

dirty talkkkk

like once you get on the bed expect to be told sweet little nothings

very vocal (duh hes the main vocalist)

I see him communicating very well in bed

tells you everything he wants you to do and expects the same thing in return

“I hope you don’t plan on walking straight tomorrow”

“Let me show you who you belong to sweetheart”

Hyungwon

first of all

he smol

probably really vanilla

so he gets a little shy and surprised when you try to spice it up a lil with your bodysuit

tries to hide his boner at first

but you know what gets him going and your plan is definitely working

stops whatever hes doing to focus on you

i see him as a big oral person (both giving and receiving)

so you’d probably start with that

seeing you all dressed up for him definitely gets him in the mood no matter what kind of day its been

“You’re so beautiful like this”

“That’s cute but I think it’d look better on the floor”

Jooheon

this is def a fetish for him

idc what you say

Jooheon lovessss you in lingerie

you can’t convince me otherwise

big into praise

“you’re so beautiful babygirl”

palms himself through his jeans because he can’t resist

wants immediate contact

a little rough when you first get into it

feels like hes been starved of your touch for years

“You can’t look this good without my permission”

“Are you ready to be punished, y/n?”

I.M

this cocky fuck

would 1 0 0 % turn it around on you when he saw you in just a bra and underwear

“do you really want me that bad?”

despite this

he’s already off the couch ready to give you what you want

I see him as very pleasing

however

when the roles are reversed

hes hella whiny

like if you tease him even a little bit he’s gonna be noticeably upset about it

the definition of a switch tbh

“Do you need help taking those off?”

“Come feel how hard you’ve made me”

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

BTS During Sex

Hyung Line

Summary: The title stands for itself, really

Requested by theoreticalthot01

Warnings: filth, really just filth, tiny bit of fluff, but GOD it’s dirty like really avert your eyes, children, christ is watching

A/N: Maknae Line will be a couple of hours because I needed a cold shower

Word count: 3329 words of pure thirst and filth

Namjoon (RM)

F i l t h y mouth don't @me

Sex drive is probably among the highest in the group

Cannot keep his hands off you if you wear a short skirt or shorts

If you don’t want to fuck your ass better wear pants to bed, I’m just saying

He's a leg man i don't make the rules

If you have thick thighs he will worship them

Loves it when you're a tease like the first time you got tipsy when you were out to dinner and leaned over the table to whisper in his ear that you weren't wearing panties he had to order dessert just to have time to control his hardon

He's the type to take his time with you but that night as soon as he walked in the door he threw down his keys and bent you over the back of the couch

In general if you wear a skirt around him you’ll end up bent back over the nearest available surface

Will 100% love it if you visit him in his studio in a skirt and no panties he’s fucking salivating if you wear a skirt and stilettos

Don’t wear a skirt out with him because he will definitely finger you under the table but I mean, he’s got long talented fingers so like..do 

After you come, trying not to moan at the fucking restaurant, he’ll deadass smirk at you and put his fingers in his mouth

Loves to see you on your knees but doesn’t ask often because he comes in your mouth so fast and he wants to fuck you instead

Talks so much during blowjobs “I love the way you swallow my cock, baby,” and lots of cursing when he comes in your mouth, will grab your hair and force you down on him but apologize for it afterward

Lowkey loves it when you gag on his cock though so he might apologize a lot

If you wear glasses and you let him come on your face and glasses he will fucking worship you forever

Has a glasses kink in general he knows it doesn’t mean you’re smart necessarily, but that’s what the media says so it stuck

So you find this out on accident

You’re dressed for work, business casual in a black aline skirt and a white button up and low heels and you put your hair up in a messy bun and forego your contacts for your glasses

You meet him at his studio on your lunch break and he’d left before you that morning 

When you walk in carrying the food he looks up from his work and does a whole double take

He looks you up and down with his mouth open, shocked

You’re wearing bright red lipstick and you think maybe it’s too much like you don’t know wtf he’s staring at you for

He’s sitting spread legged in his chair and when you walk over to kiss him he grabs your ass and makes you straddle him

You end up with your ass on the chair and your legs over his shoulders and he fucking wrecks you, he’s so rough you might have trouble walking back to work but he comes fast looking at your red mouth open and your hair falling out of that bun

His hands are shaking as he zips up his pants after, “Please don’t wear that to work again. I don’t want anyone else to see you in it.”

He talks so dirty to you right before sex or doing foreplay shit like "I'm going to ruin that tight cunt" and he gets all bossy like "on your knees" but during the act he's not that vocal just little breathy moans and when he's about to come he holds his breath so you always know

Really really loves foreplay sometimes y'all just do mutual masturbation bc he loves to watch you fall apart under his command tells you what to do and will barely touch you during

His favorite position is doggy style or you on top facing away from him he loves the curves of your waist and hips like a violin he wants to play all day long

Likes to sit in a chair while he's wearing a suit and pull his cock out and make you stand and bounce up and down facing away from him it makes him feel like a king and when your legs give out he'll lie you down on the floor gently and finish while staring into your eyes bc hes grateful that you like to please him

He doesn't normally praise you a lot but he will when you do something special for him like that

Will eat you out but not until you come usually just until your legs are shaking and you're about to because he loves to feel you clenching around his cock when you come

He's got a big dick top three in the group don't @me

Longer rather than thick though so when he gets rough it might bump your cervix

Fun fact if you let him put it in your ass he just might wife you

Jin

Fairly vanilla in bed

Not kinky although the one time you talked him into letting you blindfold him he came so hard he couldn't move for ten minutes

Loud AF, big moans heavy breathing lots of cursing "oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck"

Not as visually stimulated as some of the others you can wear a lace crotchless teddy to bed and he deadass won't notice

He's stimulated by sensation mostly which is why the blindfold worked so well at first he didn't like the lack of control but as soon as you kissed him and bit his lip a little he moaned so loud he might have woken the neighborhood

His hands are everywhere during foreplay not just your breasts or pussy he'll trail his fingers behind your knee, trace the line of your throat

His nipples are very sensitive and he loves it when you kiss and nibble them lowkey into a little pain with his pleasure but not much

He's not really into oral either giving or receiving bc he can't touch you everywhere and he can't come from just your mouth he'll get frustrated when you try and pull your hair a little so you'll hop on top of him

When he does go down on you hes stupid good at it though like this version of EatJin is what you ask for on your birthday

Jin eats pussy like it's his JOB don't @me

He'll bite your inner thighs to tease you, and you'll have marks there for a week bc when he does treat you he'll take his time

Dick isn't huge but it ain't small average length, thicker than average

He is a tiddy man he loves your breasts whether they're small, average or big he likes the way they fit in his hands and how your nipples pucker up in his mouth

Lowkey breast worship he likes them all but if you have tig ol biddies he might wife you

If you let him titty fuck you he'll be so grateful he'll go down on you every night for a week

He doesn't ask for it but you see how much he loves your breasts he'll stare at your cleavage and he'll never let you sleep if you slide into bed in a white t-shirt and no bra where he can see your nipples through your shirt

Once he pulled you into the shower with him while you were just wearing his white T-shirt and he was just fucking around bc you were giving him hell about something

But when he saw your nipples tighten, tshirt clinging to you, he grabbed you and kissed you even though you were mid yell

Fucked you against the shower door so hard you were worried the whole time he’d bust it and you’d both break your necks

Comes so fast when you play with your tits while you're riding him, which btw is his favorite position

He’ll grab on to your hips so hard you’ll have fingerprint bruises, not that you mind and towards the end he’ll get impatient and hold you down while he bucks up beneath you, fast

He’s not great at slow dicking he fucks like a jackrabbit usually

is the type to buy a ceiling mirror or fuck you in front of a full length one, loves to see your pussy swallowing his cock and loves to preen at how he looks while fucking you

He will always, always want to come on your tits if y’all are fucking in missionary

Will ask to take a picture of you with his come all over your tits so that he can use it for his spank bank while he’s on tour

He sends you more pics than you send him, dirty or otherwise

When he’s horny while he’s on tour you’ll get a dick pic and be like oh ok

Would prefer to sext rather than phone sex or Skype, he’s not that visually stimulated so your words can help more than anything else

Wants so many pics of your tits, though, like in a bra, out of a bra

If you can lick your own nipple and send him a video of it he will nut in five seconds and ask you to marry him

Yoongi

So like if you like to make love, you probably don’t need to get with Yoongi

Because even if he’s madly in love with you he’ll fuck you like you’re some skank he picked up in a club

Like Jin, he’s not that into oral either giving or receiving unless he’s just super horny and lazy and wants you to get it out of the way

He loves your mouth but like it’s not his favorite thing he’d rather fuck

It takes him a while to come like your jaw will be hurting

During a blowjob is the only time Yoongi is kinda soft with you sexually

He’ll stroke your hair and praise you in a low murmur, call you a good girl when you deepthroat him and after he comes he’ll wanna cuddle with you for a while

Prefers to come in your mouth usually but will want you to stick your tongue out and let him finish so he can see you swallow it he finds that so fucking hot he might think about it half an hour later and fuck you against a wall

So good at eating pussy, like oh my god, almost the best of the group

Fucking KILLER mouth/finger combo, will tongue your clit and finger fuck you with three fingers until you’re screaming

Lowkey it’s almost punishing when he does eat you out though, he loves to make you come more times than you can handle, overstimulation is his  brand

You’ll be begging him to stop before he’s done with you and he’ll just smirk up at you and remind you of the safe word and go back to his business if you don’t say it

You definitely 100% need a safeword established before y’all start fucking

Like, he’s not into full dom/sub (unless you are, and he’ll be down) but he’ll try to find every hard limit you have

He will finger you fucking anywhere if you wear a skirt or shorts that he can get his hand into

Like it’s his favorite thing to do in public, at a restaurant, sitting under a blanket while watching TV with the boys, at your goddamn parents house on the fourth of July when it’s dark except for the fireworks and you’re sitting on a blanket

Likes his girls submissive but if you’re a brat he will want to cuff you

He deadass gets hard when you talk back to him even if you’re not in a sexual situation

Like if he says something snappy while you’re helping him in the studio and you’re like “Fuck you and your dumbass rap lyrics” he’ll bend you over the desk so fucking fast

His ideal mate would be the brattiest sub to ever sub

Favorite position? All of them, he’s not picky, but if you’re bi and ask for a threesome with a friend his favorite position is fucking you from behind while you eat her out

In either a strict fwb situation or a long term, trusting relationship, would 100% be down for threesomes, m/f/m or f/m/f

Kind of a voyeur during them, though, loves to watch you getting fucked, if it’s a guy the harder he goes the better, he’ll be dripping precum from watching and stroking himself before he gets his turn

Will tell him what to do and where to touch you, likes to bark orders

Would let the other guy go first because he likes to watch but would go extra EXTRA hard when it was his turn to show you who you belong to

If it’s a girl he likes to watch you top, likes for you to make her come so hard her legs are shaking 

If you’re not okay with it, he’s totally fine with not actually fucking the other girl, but lowkey his fantasy is for you two to just WRECK a girl

If you’re down to finger a girl’s clit and suck her tits while he’s fucking the shit out of her, he WILL wife you

Of course would be 100% fine with you not being into threesomes, but would fantasize about it, watch porn with you involving orgies and threesomes, and it can just be a fantasy he’s not an asshole

Will dirty talk a little in bed, call you a whore if you’re okay with that kind of thing, but doesn’t talk much, isn’t very vocal in general

Quiet grunts and sometimes a low growl or two when he comes

Loves to mark you, hickies everywhere, your tits, inner thighs, all over your throat, he will bite you so hard you’ll bleed if you’ll let him. 

What really makes him hard though is when you wanna mark him

He’ll bitch if you leave visible hickeys that he has to cover with makeup, but really every time he sees them in the mirror his dick twitches, especially if you leave teeth marks

He’s not a tit man or a leg man or an ass man, it’s not about looks with him, just attitude and personality, but he’ll find something about you that turns him on, whether it’s the long line of your neck or the curve of the shell of your ear or your bare shoulders when you’re wearing an oversized sweater

Super good at sexting while you’re on tour you can be in class and he’ll send you a paragraph that has you dripping

Loves Skype sex but he sometimes will turn off his camera and just watch you (he’s a voyeur, not an exhibitionist)

Super horny in the mornings, mad morning wood, but he loves his sleep so he won’t normally do anything about it

If you wiggle your ass against him in your sleep he’ll wake you up and fuck you slow for at least half an hour

Do NOT wake him up with a blowjob unless you don’t wanna be able to walk that day

Hoseok (J-Hope)

I sure hope you like kinky shit if you’re fucking J-Hope

Has a list of kinks three pages long because he Is down for literally anything

Even if you’re into the weirdest shit he will do it and love it

You could be into literally anything and he’d be like, “oh word? let’s go”

Will try anything once and even if he lowkey hates it he’ll do it sometimes just to make you happy

Hobi. Is. A. Switch. You cannot change my mind

Has the biggest dick in BTS don’t @me

If you have a favorite position, it’ll be his too

He is a giver in bed, Hobi’s number one kink is making you come no matter how it happens

If you don’t suck dick at all he won’t care bc he’d rather eat you out anyway

If you enjoy giving head though he’ll let you do it whenever and wherever

You know that saying jack of all trades, master of none? That’s Hobi in bed

The reason he’s so fire in bed isn’t because he’s good at one thing or another, but because he will never ever let you go to sleep without at least three orgasms

You cannot fake an orgasm with him, either, he will know, he’s like doing calculations and measuring the way your skin isn’t flushed or your pussy isn’t open enough

He will be so fucking mad if you try, actually, because he has no ego in that sense if he’s not doing it right you better tell him how to do it

He doesn’t fuck you as often as some of the other guys because it’s always like a three hour ordeal

He might like foreplay better than actual sex

SO fucking loud during sex, if you ever do it in public (and he’ll want to) everyone will know

You know he’s down for anything but you find out his biggest kinks by accident hell maybe he doesn’t even know he has it until it happens

Once at a party he dragged you into a bathroom and took off your panties but when he starts to fuck you he’s so fucking loud you’re worried someone will think he’s dying so, not thinking, you stuff your panties in his mouth to quiet him

He had his eyes closed but when he tastes pussy and fabric he looks right at you and fucks you hard for like five strokes before he comes

“I’m so sorry, baby, that was so fucking hot, you can’t do that to me without warning!”

He’s lowkey mad that you made him come so fast and he won’t let you leave the bathroom until he eats you out with your legs on his shoulders until you’re the one making everyone uncomfortable at the party

He will never stop talking about it if you do something he likes so much, either, like 3 months later he’ll get horny thinking about it and text you about it

You better wear earbuds during Skype sex bc he will wake up the neighborhood

Absolutely loves the way you lick your lips when you’re watching him stroke himself, will deadass come ON the camera lens

If you’re a cocktease he will fall in love with you the first time you fuck

Like y’all are at a club and you’re grinding on him and eye fucking him and when you get back home you’ll make out with him and rub his cock through his jeans but not go any further

Is a big fucking tease and loves you to be one too but I mean, he’ll put his money where his mouth is eventually

If he’s horny and you’re on your period or something he’ll be watching every move you make even if you’re just straightening up the apartment and when you make him sexually frustrated like that everything you do is so fucking sexy

Like you are dusting with a feather duster and he suddenly imagines you putting it in your pussy

Speaking of being on your period, he’s a member of the “Put down a towel” team, he doesn’t give a fuck

He wants to see your face during sex because he loves the expressions you make and how you pant, so he won’t like doggy style much

Honestly I feel like Hobi is a face manBy that I mean if you’ve got a pretty face or something unique like light colored eyes or a square jaw, something that makes you look just a little different, Hobi will want you so fucking bad

If you’re not actually kinky, that’s cool because lowkey his kink is just...you

[neighborhood-merc]

It is I, and I am back with more a new list of fanfics for this wonderful ship called SpideyPool. 

Listen, I don’t know why I’m doing this as well (maybe because I fuckin love these boys and want to share my fave fanfics of their ship to everyone...or whatever) but here we are. [ Here are Part 1, 3 btw! ]  

Same shit applies:

The themes of the stories on this list varies, I’m either into something heart-warming, fluffy, domestic that sort of stuff or into some really really heavy and dark messed up ones. It always depends on the mood am I right? *wink wink*

It’s always gonna be smutty though lol

As long as it’s tastefully written, whatever kinky shit, I can be into it, I don’t judge the writer. With that being said if I add something straight up messed up here now/or in the future, don’t judge too, just mind the tags of the fic, for your own discretion if anything.

this list should be Wade Wilson/Peter Parker - Spiderman/Deadpool pairing only. I kinda like my babies greedy/possessive for/of each other.

I don’t care who tops or bottoms.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Summaries are taken directly from the fanfic’s summary.

Read the tags first!

Wolves [ Update: Sadly, the fic has been deleted :( ] (This is WIP, but I swear it’s so fucking good you should read it. It’s a Prison AU, and the writing is sublime)  Peter is falsely accused and sent to jail, where he meets the violent ex-mercenary, Wade.

Don't Forget To Check Your Calendar! Peter REALLY should remember to check his calendar or Peter forgets that he has a heat coming up, and in doing so causes several sticky situations to occur (thank god for Tony's NDA's).

Communication Error “Have you seriously been doing this bit for a year now?” “Bit… what bit?” Wade looked at him, confused. “This,” Peter waved his hand, “the 'we’re dating' bit.” There was a pause, and then suddenly, it was like Wade’s whole body imploded. His shoulders sunk and his head dropped and suddenly Peter knew he’d made a huge mistake. “Hahaha, yeah, the dating bit.” He held up the wine. “One year of one really bad, horrible joke.”

Night Off Wade is taking the night off when a certain Spider calls for help.

The Great Florist, Wade Wilson (this ones got a Sequel) Deadpool has found the apartment belonging to Spiderman. Or Peter Parker, if the name on the door is anything to go by. Now some people might use this information of said secret identity wrongly. Normally Wade would have been one of them. But this is different. This is Spider-Parker, I-mean, Peter-man, I-mean, fuck. Now Deadpool just have to figure out exactly what he is gonna do with this information. Which is quite simple really. He's going to leave Spidey flowers and win his heart this way or the one, where Deadpool spams Spiderman with flowers, and Spiderman has no idea what's going on

Tale As Old As Time, Song As Old As Rhyme (This belongs to the series  “A Spider in the Pool”) It is absolutely fucking good, I recommend you read them. Do read the warnings though yeah?) Peter Parker gradually falls for Wade's dubious charms. They have a lot of hang ups and kinks to negotiate, but with sex this hot, Peter can't help wanting more. Erotica with significant plot and relationship development.

Help Me, Peter Parker, You’re My Only Hope! “I need your help,” Wade admitted. “And why would I help you?” Peter asked with an amused chuckle. “Because, um, I asked you? Isn’t it what you do? Help people who ask for it?”

Damage Peter Parker finds himself in a sticky situation and who should show up to rescue him but the infamous Deadpool? Now Peter feels indebted to the mercenary... And maybe weirdly charmed by him.

I'm Serious Wade wants Peter to top. But he really, really doesn't know how to ask.

Shake it out (this series is a good boi)

Sick Days  "Wade." "Mr. Rogers." They stared at each other, one calm and silent in his fury while the other looked like a deer about to be pummeled by an eighteen-wheeler. "I'm sure you have a reason for being in my son's bed without a shirt on?"

Love Me Dead Peter tries to tell Wade his feelings. It's kind of a train-wreck.

Disgusting -Spideypool (5+1) This is a Wade Centric fic containing topics of mental health struggles and self image. Nothing too graphic but still.

Flip the Safety They both get a little carried away when they fight, but this time Wade grins over his gun and the worst part is that Peter knows he doesn’t plan on shooting him.

Do It Yourself “I bet you’re flexible enough to suck your own dick.” Wade plants that thought in Peter's head and he can't help where curiosity leads him.

Looking for a savior in these dirty streets  (WADE YOU LITTLE SHIT LOL) what's your opinion on eating ass? just looking for a yes or noThat's the text Peter gets when he's in a meeting with Anna Maria, trying his hardest to get back to running a company a few months after an unexpected trip to the underworld.

Act your age (not your shoe size) “Wanna go grab some grub? I have it on good authority there's some qual-a-tee Mexican around here.”Peter’s mouth drops open. “Uh, you always invite guys you just met out for lunch?” Deadpool laughs and leans forward. The words are muffled when he says, “Only the ones I meet in movie theaters.”

That's the power of love (cute af fic) “Yeah, so, about that. Nice to meet ya, I’m Wade Wilson but def not your Wade Wilson although I gotta say, I’m jealous of the asshole.”

Baby, i’d victoria your secret anytime (another good boy) Peter’s known Wade for a while now, so he can maybe see how this makes sense -- like, maybe Wade has a thing about going commando and just happened to have an old girlfriend’s panties lying around, one thing led to another…but…“And the bra?” Peter croaks.

It's The Alcohol Talking It wasn't every day that Wade came across a drunk-off-his-ass Spider-man.

Marco (this is fuckin’ hurt ok???) Spidey was fine. Everything was going to be fine.

Took no time with the fall (Part One of “wasn’t looking for this” series) When the Avengers had briefed him on Deadpool, they played up the Kills People for Money and Has No Real Morals angle and left out the Is Pretty Damn Funny and Charming in a Weird, Terrifying Sort of Way part.Or, five times they meet on rooftops plus one time they take it to the streets*

Now you're in my way (Part Two of “wasn’t looking for this” series) Wade's been with the Avengers for four months. The two of them have been together for five.Their relationship consists of taco-based dates, a ton of sex, and, well, Avenging.

The Stalking of Wade Wilson "It’s around this point that a niggling thread of thought worms its way into his head when he’s not paying attention, one that gently suggests that Wade might be slightly less of a bad guy than Peter previously thought."

Seeing the real you (it's not what I imagined) "The fuck,“ Deadpool said slowly. He was staring at him in a way that made Peter feel decidedly uncomfortable, and this was saying something, considering Deadpool had a habit of leering at him at the most inappropriate times. "Are you kidding me?" he eventually gasped. "How OLD are you? Twelve?“

I'll Always Protect You Anonymous said: If anyone is up for it I have a rescue prompt idea where Peter (he is not in his spiderman suit) is taken as a hostage with a gun to the head along with a few other civilians. Peter is warning the criminals to let everyone go otherwise his fiance,Wade, will kill them all. They mock him and beat him up. Then a furious Deadpool saves Peter by the most badass way possible. Also I would love if someone write how unnervingly skilled Wade is as a mercenary. Please? Anyone?

Your ass is mine  Spidey takes a toilet break while on patrol. He wasn't expecting Wade to join him.

When I'm Inside You Spiders are hard to catch. When Deadpool manages to pin one down on an NYC rooftop, he thinks he deserves a prize.

Daddy It had started as a joke, which was conveniently how most of these things always happened.

Any Means Necessary Anonymous said: Abo au where Peter is a young mutant who both displayed his heat early before his adolscent stage and spidey powers that went out of haywire the moment his heat started, leaving him to thrash around the city, running away from his family. Wade Wilson, an alpha, who happens to be a professional mercenary for hire, is now paid to catch this mutant, and try and calm him down by “any means necessary” because Peter, even as an omega is swrecking havoc amongst the city. [ 1/2 ] Of course, Wade takes those words seriously, and decides to just do that solution by first, capturing and drugging the young omega, and then, placing him in what could be described as a special and adjustable breeding stand in Wade’s attempts to calm Peter down. [ 2/2 ]

One Fear (Two Fear), Red Rear (Pink Rear) (Note: Now this is where “read the tags first” is applicable af. Don’t tell me I didn’t warn you dude) Anonymous said: Hello, another one for you: Deadpool adopts MCU Spidey and treats him like his actual child. That is until Peter starts growing up more and Wade can't help but feel attracted to him. At around age 15, Peter starts actively trying to seduce Wade. Wade resists, but in the end gives in. My kingdom for hardcore daddy kink, Sub!Peter, Wade calling him a good boy/baby boy. 

Wo Rauch Ist (this fic is fucking gold) "Someone needs to write a ‘the fire alarm went off at 3 am and now the cute guy from the flat next door is standing next to me in his underwear’ AU" 

[01010010-posts]

abo anon. imagine the omegas bois about to join their alpha during their rut for the first time & they think they're gonna get straight up pounded but instead alpha eats them out wildly & later admits that nothing pleases them more than tasting them as they listen to them gasp & pant & moan.

wow abo anon coming here knowing full well what i like,,,,crying just by thinking about RK900 bc honestly this man is weak af for his alpha but no, all he’s gonna get is be the take-out of the week he’ll enjoy it a LOT not gonna lie but he’ll also be midly annoyed bc hello??? you’re in a rut?? no?? his data says you’re not supposed to behave like this?? are you holding back or just playing with him?? still he gets turned on when you say such things and,,,, makes a mental note of being very vocal when you’re in an intimate moment, he’ll even describe in details how you’re making him feel/what you’re doing if you like itconnor is UGH he loves every moment of it an alpha that actually likes to hear his omega moaning for so long?? he could cry bc you guessed it he’s a very talkative baby but UGH the tease you’re putting him thru he’d buckle his hips begging you to stop because please? please? knot? gib knot?? please? PRETTY PLEASE?? HE LIKES IT??60 is honestly made for someone that doesn’t mind spending half of his rut making him pant and overheat so much they have to stop or he’ll reboot he doesn’t mind AT ALL trust me but he’ll return double the favour otherwise he’d feel super guilty about it he wants his alpha to feel good too“tell me!! how!! to spoil!! my bois!!” is the biggest MOOD ever fuck60: his nests are a big X he’s not good at doing them and he gets p fidgety maybe you won’t like it? or you’ll say it’s good just to make him happy? maybe it’s actually very uncomfortable?? he hates doing nests for these and other reasons so the best thing to do is him choosing fabrics/blankets/old clothes with both of your scents on and you helping putting them in the right place, it won’t be perfect and in the back of his mind he’ll get a bit distressed but a big pro is that it’s unique, it has his & his alpha’s taste, it’s cute and if he gets to cuddle with you in it it’s okay he supposes. his fav kissing spot is his nape near his usb port he melts in a literal second, gently caressing him there too!! every type of cuddle is fine really! his fav position is on top when he’s in heat because he can still sort of control what’s going to happen but he really likes to be the little spoon while being knotted and afterwards. he’s a sweet baby so he needs a sweet alpha, someone who won’t get mad at him and has a big sense of humor, he loves jokes so mhh also someone who’s a bit on the adventurous side he loves to be outside! what does he wanna hear? praises. like, a lot. and dirty talk. he loves to use heavy dirty talk and doesn’t mind if his partner uses it too (but he’s p insecure so light dirty talk for him thnx). ps. try ropes/sensory deprivation with him pls,,,, not gonna regret it.connor: this man has graduated from nests’ college honestly,,,, a perfectionist, his nests are to die for HOW the fuck does he even make you feel so relaxed??? a mystery. he won’t asks you anything except for yours fuzzy sweaters, the rest is personally hand picked and it might be weird if you analyze it individually but he knows what he’s doing. kisses mhh inner thighs & face. fav position? his alpha on top and him down,,,, but he loves to be on his alpha’s chest and hug them when knotted,,,, he might lightly doze off and snore, heaven. he’s still himself so he was made to mix with humans so everyone’s fine. he can adapt. AGAIN: praises. just that. doesn’t need anything else.RK900: fuck him honestly because he’s super spoiled in this AU okay my man needed some much deserved cuddles. so his nests are rather minimalistic, black, white, gray, blankets, some pockets where you can store already approved snacks and YOUR things obv that’s the big part he can’t sleep easy without your scent so uhh?? fav spot to kiss? his abdomen & his back. fav position? whatever feels good i think but sometimes he wants to ride. while knotted he loves to hug his alpha but he also wants to be able to get cuddles so it’s both of you on one side, facing each other, kissing plenty. needs a VERY patient alpha this boy’s pretty jelly & needy. what does he wants to hear? that you’re good and you love him. also that you’re going to fucking eat your greens.omegas: connor doesn’t mind it but he much prefers when it’s his alpha riding his face his favourite pastime IM NOT JOKING this baby loves to be mouthknotted plus his tongue is?? ugh not going into details he’s a kinky shit but you get the hint60 likes it more than he should it’s fun & if his alpha likes it too where’s the cons?? there’s noneRK900 is a brat sometimes so ugh yep totally his thing if you ask me but it’s more of a treat so it’s not an everyday eventalphas: connor loves it,,,, sm,,,, always tongue thing but gosh his omega moaning above him? he’s going to crash from the pleasure60′s really happy if his omega likes it, he’s more of a fan of doing other things but not a problem at allRK900 weak af android found dead in detroit bc he adores his omega too much and them riding his face is bliss android heaven? never heard of it until NOWFUCK DOES HE SOUNDS CUTE ALLRIGHT!!!!!! love himhe’s p embarrassed like “you know,,,, if you have other things to do it’s fine just,,,, im really hot rn so,,, mhh” how can you say no to this little thing begging for your affectionhe has the prettiest moans and he’s so soft,,,, he feels like a cloud and aftercare is where’s the best at(him clinging because he wants his alpha to knot him more and cuddle? that’s,,,, that’s all i want in the world)DARE YOU? yep you dare.as soon as 60′s confident with his partner he gets super uneasy without them so uhh?? no?? heat without alpha?? big red warning he literally pleads you to let him call he needs to hear your voice and maybe if you have time whisper some things to him and hear him come while on the phone BUT please cuddle him a lot when you come home he’s lonelyconnor’s annoyed mostly, pouting because that was not the deal :( now he’s all alone what’s he’s supposed to do???? okay FINE he will play with some toys/videos but you’re going to give him extra attention next time he wants to have sexRK900 can i say it one more time? HE’S NEEDY WTF no no leave alone esp during heat it must be a life or death thing or he will get very grumpy for two whole days no not even overstimulating the heck out of him will work no wait maybe that’ll work just fine but lots of kisses and cuddles too or you can sleep on the couch baby

[technophiiliac-blog]

Do clintsharon for the meme

ULTIMATE SHIP MEME!

Send in two (or more) names and I’ll fill all this out about the ship || accepting

@xmarksthescott

General:

Rate the Ship -  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - they are endgame and you can’t tell me otherwise

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - it was pretty slow burn

How was their first kiss? - adorable af

Wedding:

Who proposed? - clint

Who is the best man/men? -  clint wrestled sharon for custody of steve

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - idk like nat or bobbi or jess or smth?? 

Who did the most planning? - tbh probably clint. he hasn’t had an actual wedding, so he’s getting excited

Who stressed the most? - probably sharon

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - she wouldn’t let barney come

Sex:

Who is on top? - i wanna say clint but we both know it’s sharon

Who is the one to instigate things? - clint

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - idk 20ish? smth like that? 

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - def do, it’s part of the unconditional love thing they’re trying

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - um, i don’t think sharon can have kids and after both of them having miscarried children they’re not eager

How many children will they adopt? - probs none

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - clint totally would be tho

Who is the stricter parent? - sharon

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - sharon. clint is way too reckless to yell at them for it

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - sharon. she let clint do it once and he was found asleep on the kitchen floor with a piece of bread covered in mustard on his face

Who is the more loved parent? - probably clint cause he’s way more fun... and by fun i mean reckless

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? clint. he’s way too good at the domestic parent thing

Who cried the most at graduation? - neither of them really? maybe they both got a little teary 

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - both of them, they have so much pull in shield

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - probably sharon

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - also likely sharon

Who does the grocery shopping? - sharon. last time she let clint do it he came home with 30 microwavable Salisbury steaks and no vegetables

How often do they bake desserts? - maybe like once a month

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - meat def. sharon has to keep reminding clint vegetables are needed

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - oh def clint. he’s surprisingly good at cooking, even if she doesn’t believe it when he says so

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - also clint. usually when sharon is tired and he thinks he needs smth nice

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - probably clint, not that he’ll admit it

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - sharon is forever cleaning up after human disaster

Who is really against chores? - clint

Who cleans up after the pets? - clint cleans up after lucky

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - also clint

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - probably clint. he doesn’t know what’s acceptable by normal not messy standards

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - sharon is always finding clint’s missing money

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - probably sharon, but not by much

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - they both go in a cheesy romantic movie montage in central park

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - clint gets way too into holidays

What are their goals for the relationship? - um get married and be happy?? 

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - clint. always clint.

Who plays the most pranks? - also clint.

[noncompliant-fuckery]

1-99, it's been a while :)

I know :) but mostly cause all the ones I’ve been seeing are ones we already done or are kinky as shit and that’ll possibly be awkward.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

-Batman-Jaden Smith. Retrograde-James Blake. H.E.R- Focus.  Loyalty-Kendrick Lamar.  Location-Khalid. Blind Man-Xavier Omar.

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

-All of my ancestors.

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

-I don’t know where I put my books and technically the only book I have near me right now is two of my diaries which are strategically hidden in my room and that's a book, right? So anyways, “I think she was talking about me, I hope. I've been thinking about it with a smile on my face since.”

4: What do you think about most?

-college and everything i'm neglecting to do

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

-”Your glasses should be here in a day or two.”-dad

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

Without. Just underwear. The less the better honestly 😉

7: What’s your strangest talent?

Lol Nothing will prepare you for what I have to say... So every once in awhile but not very often something will happen to my eye and if I press the part by my tear duct next to the bridge of my nose it’ll make a squeaky sound. I think it’s linked to my allergies lol

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

-Boys go to mars and girls go to jupiter? Haha idk

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

-Never had the pleasure.

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

-Probably last week tbh

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

-fear of having someone slice the back of my knees

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

-I was always more of a sticking foreign objects in my mouth kind of kid (that sounded so bad lol)

13: What’s your religion?

Agnostic I think.

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

-Fucking around on my ripstik. At the beach, or just walking around exploring.

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

-Neither honestly.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

-Not much of a band person but my favorite artist right now is Chance the Rapper. Green day was good at some point though.

17: What was the last lie you told?

-Probably that I support my dad getting a second job and that I stayed home all week when I didn’t. Both told to my parents. You may be an angel but I am a horrible person inside lol

18: Do you believe in karma?

-Yes.

19: What does your URL mean?

I’m half stud, and half muffin. Style wise. Named by my sister.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

-weakness: no perseverance. strength: finding the good in every bad situation and coming up with clever ways to do things either for fun or to solve problems.

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

-Michelle Rodriguez 😍

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

-Nah

23: How do you vent your anger?

-A frustrated scream, a lot of cussing, a strong urge to punch something. But this only happens if I'm completely alone and can’t hear me and i'm not thinking about consequences. Which is quite literally never. Otherwise, I get very very quiet.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

-I have a collection of empty water bottles littering my bedroom floor right now?

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

-Depends on the conversation and person. But I like video chatting with you to remember what you look like and sound like sometimes. Its also fun 😊

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

-I’d say it’s a nice improvement.

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

-hate: pure silence because it is most definitely not silent. Love: the sound of grocery bags being carried into my house lol

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

-What if I stayed in gymnastics or tae kwon do

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

-Thats complicated. I believe something happens to the dead and I’m not sure “heaven” is the end destination. Humans are aliens. We are not special and if people believe we are a lone here, their dumb af.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

-My fan and Bob the teddy bear

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

-Nothing, my allergies are killing me right now.

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

-Nothing's quite made that much of an impression for me to remember such a place.

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

-Theres no snow on the East Coast..I think

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

-Jidenna. He has an interesting look.

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

-Life is a grand experiment to test all that can make or break us.

36: Define Art.

- A ketchup stain on a white t-shirt.

37: Do you believe in luck?

-Depends but yes.

38: What’s the weather like right now?

-Blue skies, the sun is shining, a couple baby clouds and the wind is blowing the leaves outside my window. Seems hot.

39: What time is it?

-3:30pm

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

-Yes. So many close calls but no not yet.

41: What was the last book you read?

-Book 3 of The Testing series called Graduation Day by Joelle Charbonneau. College interrupted my finishing it.

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

-Love it.

43: Do you have any nicknames?

-Shoshoes, Worm.

44: What was the last film you saw?

-Dawn of the Plant of the Apes or maybe Kidnap

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

-Sprained my neck and back

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

-No there scary up close but one landed on my ass once.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

-Starting old shows that have like 10 seasons

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

-Lesbian

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

-Don’t quite remember but possibly. Nothing to crazy I’m sure

50: Do you believe in magic?

-I believe that there's a possibility for it one day.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

-Yes

52: What is your astrological sign?

-Aries 😈

53: Do you save money or spend it?

-Both. Not a good combination

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

-Movie tickets

55: Love or lust?

-Lust

56: In a relationship?

-Nope

57: How many relationships have you had?

-One real one.

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

-lol no.

59: Where were you yesterday?

-In my room

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

-My shorts are pink and black.

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

-Less clothes the better, remember.

62: What’s your favourite animal?

-Turtles

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

-Make em laugh

64: Where is your best friend?

-Home finally I think?

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

armyofchaos of course, elaxisfae, prettyboyshyflizzy, aniefiok, sixpenceee

66: What is your heritage?

-Who knows.

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

-Talking you and playing Assassins Creed

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

-Watson

69: Biggest turn ons?

-lol

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

-Yes

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

-Sorry little guy, I’ve got bills. But I'll call the cops or get someone's attention to do it for me.

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

-A: the important people will know. B: Complete my promises. C:Hell yea, the hell is after this life??? What happens to my inner voice? Me???

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

-Trust is love.

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

-Off the top of my head, Yoga by Janelle Monae and Jidenna.

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

-5703

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

-Laughing and communicating

77: How can I win your heart?

-By giving a damn.

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

-If I’m to be honest, those pills.

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

-Being friends with you

80: What size shoes do you wear?

-All my shoes right now are men's and those are size 8

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

-”Here lies a gay potato”

82: What is your favourite word?

-Fuckernaut. I call ppl that in my head quite often. Yes, that includes you.

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

-Fuck.

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

-Oh my god, honestly, definitely, seriously, jeez… I have a problem, help lol

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

-Currently,Drake-Marvins Room.

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

-Black, army green, burgundy.

87: What is your current desktop picture?

-Some kind of stone stairway/hallway. I should really update it.

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

-That fucking orange cheeto with legs.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

-Depending on the person “How do you really feel?”

90: Turn offs?

-Trump supporters

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

-Telekinesis.

92: where are your parents from?

-America

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

-When my mom started getting sick

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

-We’ll go with Kehlani today.

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

-You already know where 😊

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

-Yup, a couple of dumbasses.

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

-Not inside the car but out the door on the side of the road.

98: Ever been on a plane?

-When I was little.

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say.

-You stupid fucks.