#they are MENACES and they WILL CAUSE PROBLEMS

[dollarbils]

admit you want me | b.e.

billie eilish x fem!reader

context. billie, your roommate, starts a fight with you which soon gets heated.

warnings. violent language, harsh insults, physical violence, mean!billie, smut.

request masterlist

you’d both forgotten why you were fighting. something about billie’s lifestyle, particularly the many women you’ve woken up to using your towels, in your shared bathroom. but it had escalated into much more, insults hastily thrown left and right.

“oh my god, quit bitching.” the tips of her hands pushed your shoulders away from her, causing you to stumble back. disbelief plastered on your face, however, still choosing to ignore it.

“i’ll quit bitching, if you quit being such a god damn whore.” she went silent and you regretted it immediately, her temper wasn’t one to mess with and now that you had, it sparked an inkling of fear.

“what the fuck did you just call me.” she grabbed your shoulders but you quickly pushed her off you, fighting her physically instead of answering the question.

“fucking quit it!” she yelled before losing it and pushing you harshly against the wall, pinning your arms by your side with immense protest from your side.

“repeat what you said.” she said it as if she hadn’t heard you. no, she hadn’t fully believed she heard you.

“you heard me perfectly, billie.” her tongue poked her cheek as she chuckled.

“repeat it, i dare you.” she taunted, expecting your defeat. you’d never usually stood up to her this much, you’d always put up with her bullshit excuses in the past.

“i asked you to quit being a whore.” she nodded her head a couple times, taking in your words.

“i was hoping i’d misheard you.” her eyes tore past your facade, staring deep into your own.

“nope.” you’d mustered all the confidence you had left, knowing you’d break within the next minute. your hands were already numb from the force at which she had your wrists locked to the wall.

“i think you should take some time to reevaluate.” she suggested, moving dangerously close to your face.

“hm, i don’t think i need to.” she pushed her body against yours as you groaned, her lips brushing yours when she opened them to speak again.

“no? i mean it’s hypocritical really.” you raised your brow and she fake-pouted, mocking you.

“how the fuck is it hypocritical?” her clothed breasts were pushed up against yours, and you’d lingered on the thought for a second to long, but you kept up the strong face.

“don’t act like your not a little whore yourself.” she was teasing you purely for her amusement now, the fight long forgotten. her focus had moved to breaking you. cracking you open. ruining your perspective of your own innocence.

“i’m not going to entertain this for your pleasure, billie. fuck off.” she mocked your tone of voice and you rolled your eyes, she was so fucking childish.

“trust me i’ve got an entirely different view of what my pleasure is. teasing you barely makes top fifty.” she retorted, dismissing any hint of enjoyment in talking to you.

“top fifty? what an honor.” it was your turn to mock her, and she lifted your chin, her eye’s menacing as she looked at you.

“you’re such a fuckin’ brat.” she shook her head, reflecting on her words.

“it turns you on doesn’t it.” this time you’d truly caught her off guard, as her expression visibly shifted.

“what’s got you so brave today?” she deflected from the comment, neither affirming nor denying.

“maybe I’m just sick of your bullshit.” you brought the heated conversation back to the topic of your fight.

“my bullshit?” she seethed, daring you to voice what exactly her bullshit was.

“yes your fucking bullshit. your out here fucking different girls every night, which i wouldn’t have a problem with if you weren’t so goddamn loud, and if they had the common decency not to use my towels. i’m doing like twenty loads of laundry each week!” she had to stop herself from laughing at your outburst.

“this is all over some fuckin’ towels?” she raised her brow in disbelief.

“no! it’s the principle!” frustration coated your words, she didn’t get it.

“so all i’m getting from this is that you’re jealous.” she shrugged her shoulders and you couldn’t help rolling your eyes. she kept her tone calm and collected, while you were practically raging at her.

“wha- jealous? how the fuck did you come up with that nonsense?” she chuckled when you defended yourself.

“nonsense is a bit dramatic, babe.” she licked her teeth, the term of endearment catching you off guard.

“don’t call me that.” you huffed, she was no longer holding you against your will, and it had come to your attention. you weren’t fully sure why you were still stationed against the wall, giving her the space to tower over you.

“why not?” she teased, this was all a game to her.

“because it’s not going to be that easy to get into my pants.” she laughed softly again.

“and what makes you think that’s what i want?” she poked her cheek with her tongue, hypocritically staring at your lips.

“you’re not the best at hiding it.” she smiled though you thought she’d take offense to the comment.

“yeah? i think you like the attention though.” she bit her lip as she leaned in, closer to your face, testing the waters before she made any sort of commitment.

“mm, maybe.” you shrugged your shoulders playfully but she just kept staring down at you.

“so are you gonna admit it or not?” she tilted her head in question.

“admit what?” she shook her head slightly, as if to warn you not to play dumb.

“admit you want this,” she tightened her grasp on your waist, “admit you want me.”

“nope.” she bit her lip at your response, god it turned her on when you denied her.

“that’s a shame.” she grabbed your chin and her lips met yours, hot and fiery as she pushed you further into the wall. you kissed her back almost instantly, not welcoming her, but submitting to her as if you had no choice. your rationality had fled but you couldn’t care less, her lips too soft, too plump, too warm to think about anything else.

“damn.” she broke away, as breathless as you, her heart racing yours.

“yeah, uh. that was-” you were flustered, not knowing what to do with yourself or your words.

“js’ shut up.” she brought her lips to yours again, this time forcing herself into your mouth, tongues dancing as she backed you through the door and into her bedroom. she continued kissing you while she took control of your movements, only breaking away to push you onto the bed.

“billie.” you called as she unzipped her jeans, soon doing the same to yours.

“mhm? get used to saying’ that.” you rolled your eyes, continuing your previous sentence.

“how many girls have you fucked in this bed?” she raised an eyebrow, figuring out wether you were serious or not.

“why? jealous?” she didn’t answer the question.

“not by a long shot, just curious.”

“mhm. sure.” she ignored the question completely, forgetting about what you’d said.

“open up.” she gestured to your mouth, and soon her saliva met the back of your throat, as she stared at you, silently instructing you to swallow.

“look who’s bein’ a good girl all of a sudden. such a slut, taking everything i give you.” her words were contradictory, but you didn’t bother pointing it out, blaming it on her chaotic mind.

“nothin’ to say?” her strap dug into your thigh when she hovered above your face.

“fuck y-” she smirks as she breaks up your words with the tip of her strap gliding across your entrance.

“what was that?” your face shys away from her, eyes closing and turning your head to the side. she makes an effort to express her discontent with this, pulling your face by your cheeks, forcing you to look at her.

“bil.” your plea didn’t go unnoticed and she held your hips to stop you from squirming.

“what?” you pouted when she didn’t move from her position.

“billie.” she bit her lip, enjoying how filthy her name sounded when it came out of your lips like that.

“you can keep whining my name but it won’t tell me what you want.” she shrugged her shoulders, her lips tracing patterns against your neck as your breaths grew heavy.

“please, i need-” she sunk her strap into you slightly, stealing way your breath as your mouth fell open. god she wanted to take a picture, having you like this was so hot.

“hm? what do you need? admit it baby, come on.” you still didn’t reply, testing her patience.

“okay, i’ll help you out a bit yeah? do you want this? my strap?” she wished she was recording, having had no proof of you agreeing to her words when you nodded your head.

“yes, bil. please.” she would’ve teased you further, but she couldn’t resist pushing into you. losing herself in the process.

“i want you.” you’d said once your walls had adjusted to her size, clenching around it in attempt for friction.

“if only you could see yourself now, my whore.” she smirked down at you, gliding her strap in and out very subtly watching you fall apart.

“mm, billie.” you gave in, moaning her name openly now, watching her enjoy it more than she’d ever let on.

“mhm? what’s up baby?” her hands travelled around your breasts, warm against her skin.

“harder pl-please.” now she really wished she’d been recording.

“what was that?” she asked you to repeat yourself, fastening her hands on your hips as she continued diving into you.

“billie.” her movements quickened, sending you back against the pillow.

“i didn’t hear you, babe.” her grin was all you needed to see to know she definitely had heard you.

“harder please.” you whined again, for the last time you hoped.

“god, you’re sexy.” her teeth pulled her lip back as she watched you come undone on her strap, begging for release and then begging for more.

[senmiyaazx]

Hi! If that's ok could i request Sol with a reader that does not fuck around? Somebody bothering? They're already swinging before the mf can finish the sentence. Someone following them? They're pulling out the hammer out the purse and start charging the person. And pretty much anything in their hands becomes a weapon.

Just curious to see his reaction lol

oo this is an interesting scenario especially in the library scene

SOL X GN READER

cw: guess what! not proofread. reader is lowkey a menace. violence obviously, but it's not that detailed.

The first time you and Sol met was a surprise. He was getting beat up, not wanting to cause a scene in the library and he's outnumbered.

Until you appear from the corner and start roundhouse kicking these bastards like stirring coffee. On top of that, you weren't even that hurt after dealing with those two bullies! Well, aside from the bruise on your cheeks.

Sol was already in love with you before, but when you held your hand out to him with a charming smile on your lips he fell harder, if that was possible. (He's already signing the marriage papers)

Since then, you've become something like Sol's protector? Sol can defend himself perfectly fine. He gets into fights all the time, it's nothing new to him. But he's absolutely smitten when you do it nonetheless, rolling your sleeves up the moment you even see someone looking at Sol the wrong way.

While your feistiness provides good benefits, such as being able to defend yourself even when he's not there, Sol wishes you could.. tone it down a little. He doesn't want you to get hurt that often. Because he'll deal with the other person one way or another. Or risk yourself hurting the wrong person (Someone from a higher class) and that wouldn't do you much good, wouldn't it?

He's happy he has such a strong and brave darling though. His eyes are filled with hearts as you walk through the hallways with your head held high and some students who recognize you scramble to get out of your way in fear of getting on your nerves.

And he loves you. He really does. But please put that hammer away— where did you even get that?! — he wasn't following you! He was he just so happened to be in the same place as you. Geez, you're scary when you get mad.

A little cute too when you furrow your brows at him, telling him to be more careful around you. Sorry pumpkin, he can't resist you.

He realized quickly you're lowkey a hazard to people when you ask him for his least favorite pen in art class and proceeded to nearly hospitalize someone who disrespected you, with it. You obviously get in trouble afterwards, but the uncaring grin you send him made his heart stop for a moment.

"Least no one's gonna bother us now." You say after getting lightly scolded by Sol.

He's pretty sure you noticed the way his cheeks flushed at that.

Since then, he makes sure you're not within any objects that could harm people. Even something as silly as a ruler. (He's seen the way you sent someone to the clinic with a book. He's not taking any risks)

Eventually, whether he does it consciously or not, he ends up protecting other people from you instead of the other way round. Sol doesn't know how it happened or when he started to give his scariest glare to anyone who even thinks about approaching you with malicious intent. It's a win-win for him. He gets to spend more time alone with you and he prevents other people from earning your wrath! The only problem is that he won't be able to do this when he's not with you.

Whatever. He hates to admit it, but hopefully that Crowe dude handles you as well as he does.

And he trusts you, too. He knows you have a goal in mind for this school and he knows you won't get yourself in enough trouble to get expelled. There are.. simply some times where you can't help but put people in their place. Which Sol respects a lot.

That doesn't stop Sol from getting paranoid, however. Oh well, at least he's the one who gets to patch you up after you get into another fight<3

[wizardsnorlax]

Ok so update on the Spiral Jon fic I'm writing: I'm getting it onto Ao3 bit by bit because it's super difficult to write on mobile, but I need to take a break and get ideas for the season three events out before they get lost, here's a link to the season 2 notes

Ok here we go

Melanie does not join the Archives, this is for the best

At one point in season 2 Jon gave Sasha Georgie's contact info for "in case of emergency" use so Sasha is gonna be (mostly) ok she just needs to pop an allergy pill every once in a while

Sasha might be good with the hardware of a computer but the software might as well be a completely different language so she's very little help with Georgie's show

Jon takes to reading Statements like I took to weed gummies

Sasha follows about the same trail of clues as Jon did in Canon but Daisy's grip on Sasha is a bit harder to hold so Sasha gets claw slashes on her arms instead of a knife at the throat

Things that have changed about Jon while Sasha was gone: his hair now has ringlet curls, the extra flexibility in his joints has progressed but not to the point anyone has noticed let alone would consider a problem and his eyes are twitchy from the stress of filling her position to the point he looks like he's constantly ODed on caffeine

Sasha gets back in the office and when everyone learns they can't quit or be fired Jon makes it his personal mission to be as much of a menace to Elias as possible

but he'd never do that to Sasha, she gets doodles of her hanging out with Cecil from Nightvale because she's a good boss:)

Martin scolds Tim for how he's been treating Jon and Sasha because of the changes caused by first and secondhand paranormal bullshit exposure

Jon gets to go out for drinks with people who actually like him

Everyone learns why Jon has a shirt that says "the difference between me and Superman is Superman has Super Vision, I need constant supervision

A discussion about who takes Jon home with them is had because at some point the poor goober lost his shoes and started trying to wrap around Martin like a belt

Sasha gets kidnapped on her way home

Michael helps her because some part remembers being an archival assistant and she's treated hers so much better than Gertrude did

Helen doesn't take Michael's place but the door still rejects him and the corridor collapses as both Sasha and Michael crash into Jon's new flat

Michael is freed but is in such bad shape he needs to be in the hospital for several weeks on recovery

Things attempt to be normal

Tim and Jon are menaces to Elias in very different ways

Jon doesn't want anyone traveling alone

Elias doesn't care but can't STAND the idea of Jon being there without a buffer so Sasha gets to have company on her trip, Tim goes to India and gets the ghost bullet, cue Mystery Mousketool meme

Martin, Basira and Daisy are handling the workload as best they can but since none of them are particularly suited to the task things go badly because Martin is terrible at direct leadership

When Sasha and Jon get kidnapped by Trevor and Julia, Sasha decides that the best way to clear some of the air is through lore dumping her backstory (still to be determined)

Jon is deemed suspicious by the false cop cause he does NOT look sober

Insert attempted police brutality interrupted by a shotgun

While the false cop is regenerating Jon gets the "how did you two meet" Statement from Julia

They get to the cabin and Jon freaks out a little at the idea of reading ANOTHER cursed book

Big relief when nobody gets eaten this time

Nobody ever believes him but Jon has kept every promise he's made (not that he's made many before but it's the principle of it)

Yoinks the page

Our duo finishes the assignment

Back home

Sasha learns about the storage unit

JON STOP REACHING FOR THE EXPLOSIVES YOU ABSOLUTE GREMLIN

Tim is EXTRA motivated to wreck shop at the Unknowing

Jon and Martin stay behind to be distractions

Big boom happens, Tim makes it out because the guy's literally too angry to die, Sasha is in the coma, Daisy is in the Coffin and Basira is just having a time of it

Jon gets mind fondled by Elias and it makes Martin want to rip the bastard's throat out but the best he can do is have the cops rough him up as much as possible

Jon is temporary head of the Archives and the pressure swallows him whole and he crashes like a meteorite because he desperately doesn't want to be the one giving orders

Martin's "assistance" has been leaving cobwebs in places nobody checks

And thus we enter season 4

[pinksparklelps]

Birds ?

Love em

Have 2 budgies

My advice ?

Dont get a bird

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

about that one lan qiren & jin guangshan art: .....does that mean wen ruohan has both or is he as flat as a board on the opposite? XD

Mans so flat they rotated him 90 degrees and he disappeared from the narrative.

[delineate-creates]

Day 5: Map

There was a warmth in Harry's chest, a physical thing, like the sun shining through a gap in the clouds. Of course Tom liked the map as much as Harry did. It combined two things they both loved—Hogwarts and being nosy.

From chapter 37 of @cybrid’s A Dangerous Game

[vigilskeep]

the problem with inventing backstory ocs for ur inquisitors is that u will always be like wait... that could be an inquisitor...

[twinterrors29]

Anakin, practicing his basic with children's books: Obi-Wan, what's a duck? Obi-Wan: it's a type of semi-aquatic bird common on many planets in the Core, why do you ask? Anakin: this is the third book that has mentioned bringing one with you when you bathe Obi-Wan: ...huh Anakin: yeah it sounds weird Obi-Wan: Anakin: Obi-Wan: do you want to try it out? Anakin: ...yeah! Ten Years Later Rex: it's time for us to hit the showers, General Anakin: oh good, I saw just what we need earlier, let me go get one real quick! Rex: ...why did the General just run back outside? Kix: ...is he chasing those birds? Anakin, returning triumphant with a confused duck pinned under his arm: I brought us a duck to bathe with! Rex: ...is this a nat-born thing? Anakin: yeah, I guess so! Rex: ...sure, let's try it Two Weeks Later Padme: Ani, why don't we...take a bath together ;) Anankin, excited: that sounds great! I brought a duck back from the campaign with me, give me just a moment to grab it! Padme: what

[bisexualelphie]

julie e os fantasmas (original julie and the phantoms) was so wild. like, what do you mean the boys were crushed to death by a truck? what do you mean julie has committed more than one crime? what do you mean the main triangle consists of a rockstar with a closet dnd player vs a my chemical romance revenge era rejected song? what do you mean the ghost love interest was a menace to society in life and public enemy number 1 in death? what do you mean he was tortured more than once? what do you mean there was a dude trying to enslave ghosts and this plotline only lasted two episodes????

[raintailed]

BEHOLD. The most HORRIBLE and WRETCHED beast imaginable.

This is a new ref for Skeeber (it/its) aka the Menace! It eats pearls and delights in mayhem! Lilypads Afloat is at fault for this lmao

[ray-elgatodormido]

A page of DW related drawings.

I drew Xiahou Dun and I’m like omagahh himb

This doodle does not exist

[undertheredhood]

broke: the lazarus pit induces psychotic rage on anyone who uses the pit as a price for being healed, and thus they cannot be held accountable for their actions while experiencing 'pit madness'

woke: the lazarus pit is trying to protect and help jason be happy, but jason is super unhinged and wants to cause problems

[saltycharacters]

Capcom hire me right now I literally have an entire hypothetical Klavier Investigations game in my head and it's so cool i promise

[i3utterflyeffect]

Also another interesting thing to think about: how does stick!noogai's opinions on his creations change over the time he knows them?

i think it's very complicated for him at first since he doesn't really know how to even feel about the fact that they're alive, initially. at first he and Vic completely hate each other at first, but as time goes on it sort of becomes an 'only I'm allowed to be mean to him' situation. You'd never get any sort of admission of care from Vic, and it's mostly out of 'oh, Chosen will LITERALLY kill me if i don't help him', at first, but after several years there is at the very least an understanding there.

he doesn't really think too much about the idea of them having free will when he makes chosen (he's already having a crisis that they can even feel in the first place, not to mention the fact that he's a stick), so he doesn't think too much of it when he gives Chosen the mission to protect him, but he does start to realize that it's really stressful for Chosen to have a directive embedded inside of them, and over time he realizes how badly meddling with this stuff can screw people up, but he doesn't really know how to undo it.

since i'm not totally sure about Dark and SC's situation I can't really say when it comes to them, but I do think he views SC as a little sibling! he pulls older sibling shenanigans on them all the time but he cares about them a lot despite being an absolute menace to them

[forever-eternal]

I need to introduce you to The Babies

[flowerflamestars]

Effloresce Snippet

He kissed both her cheeks, bending even lower to raise Nesta’s right hand, pressing her cold knuckles to his brow in solemn salute. “Nesta Archeron,” Jurian said, like her name was twice its length, a foreign weighted history, “You ready to know whose blood runs in your veins?” Nesta, who had lived this particular conversation thrice over now, only shook her head. Touched between his brows in curious, only half-understood benediction, allowing him to step away. “Jurian. You survived the fires.” His smile was only in his eyes, rainwater grey searingly bright. “You wouldn’t waste time sending messages to corpses.” Nadia, from where she’d stopped three swaggering paces into the room, shedding her coat and swords with utterly false carelessness, huffed out a rough laugh. It was a bizarre comfort to see her, unchanged- strong brown hands dense with tattoos that bloomed into looser patterns up her arms, those knives and that hideous leather vest, remnants of a life that seemed nearly simple, now. So very far away. She cast a scathing look at Nesta’s guard, the Illyrian busy visibly wishing murder upon Jurian, his entire focus held on the distance between their bodies. “Protection has gotten more interesting,” she said, tone blithe, “Where’s your Vanserra?” “Honeymoon.” Nesta let herself lean back onto the desk, hand behind her body biting into its ash lip. Dawn, Winter, reconnaissance. Elain walking underhill in mortal wedding pearls, Lucien at her back. A heaved sigh, Jurian’s head oh so briefly dipped. “Wars and weddings, my lady. Blessings.” “When you were our age, humans couldn’t marry.” “Nor does he believe in any damned gods,” Nadia crossed the room fae quick, expression wicked as the guard flinched, stopping right alongside Nesta. A test, twofold- Nesta didn’t pull a knife as Nadia had once taught her, the legionnaire didn’t start in on violence without orders. “Don’t believe the prayers, unless they’re bloody.”