#they almost did it during their first meeting but dazai nullified them before they could break reality

[kaurwreck]

do you think akutagawa and atsushi's coco melon ability combo could cut through the bubble dimension to get everyone out?

No, I think they need to go full tiger and full two-headed dragon and touch noses to cause a worm hole-type singularity.

[tender-rosiey]

Okay so I know someone already requested something like this so you can ignore this if you want, but I was wondering if you could do ADA Dazai, Akutagawa, and Atsushi reacting to their s/o almost dying during a mission? Also I love your writing!

❥ Bsd Characters reaction to s/o almost dying

Includes: Dazai, Atsushi and Akutagawa

ᴀ/ɴ: I hope you like this dear! And I am glad you like my writing 🥺💘; Warnings: mentions of death (obviously) and blood

Dazai Osamu:

{Season 2 Spoilers so beware ✨}

While Higuchi was talking with Dazai

You were left with Atsushi, Kirako and Naomi

You weren’t expecting at all to find the catastrophe called Q approaching you guys

Just as you were about to warn them about touching him, he took control over Atsushi

To which he started attacking you guys

While Dazai was with Higuchi and oblivious to what’s happening until the last moment

When he found out he ran back and hoped that none of you were hurt

But the sigh of you getting choked by Atsushi and on the verge of death as you were losing your breath was too much

“A-atsushi please l-let go..” you said weally as your face was losing its color

He touched Q’s doll as fast as he could and nullified his ability

He held you in his arms just as Atsushi let go and was staring at you with eyes swirling with hurts and worry

Why didn’t you use your ability? Did you not want to hurt Atsushi?

He almost lost you right before his eyes

And you would’ve suffered a lot until you got to...

He doesn’t even want to mention it, he can never bare the thought of you dying

Dazai was a man of a strong mind and emotional control

However you were his weak point

He caressed your cheek as he saw you trying to regain your breathing again

Millions of questions flooded his mind but as he saw Q leave with the train promising to get back at him for locking him up

Dazai growled lowly and dangerously

“Next time I see you I will rip your heart out and I will make you regret thinking about hurting Y/N, I promise.”

He then looked down at you, with his face void of mischief or hatred as if he had another face

“Love, are you alright now?”

He knew it was pointless to ask you but he was waiting for any kind of reaction

It was needed to get you all to a doctor to make sure nothing more than what he saw happened

He sighed in relief as he saw you stir and snuggle closer to his chest

He placed a soft kiss to your head while you opened your eye “Samu..?”

He put you to his back to give you a piggy ride back home

“Angel hold tight.”

You placed a firm grip holding onto him

“I am so sorry, I can’t believe I did this! I am no use! I am sorry Y/N-san!”

The poor boy rambled as he was scarred from what he did

Let alone to what he almost did to you

His favorite person in the ADA

His superior’s lover

As he was lost in thought

Dazai slapped Atsushi

“Stop pitting yourself. Pity yourself and life becomes an endless nightmare.”

The boy looked up with fear evident in his eyes

“BUT I HURT Y/N-“

“It’s alright, you didn’t mean to. At least she is okay now.”

Dazai’s grip on you tightened

He never wanted to see you like that again

And he was going to make sure of that

Atsushi Nakajima:

{This is before the Guild went ✨poof✨ btw}

Frantically searching everywhere he knew

Atsushi was worried

Where did you go?

Just an hour ago you were by his side smiling like the angel you are

Now he can’t find a trace of you

He came back to the agency empty handed and a gloomy face

The first thing he heard was Tanizaki calling to him

“Atsushi! They have Y/N and they want you in return of giving her back!”

His eyes flashed a dangerous yellow, was this about the bounty on him?

Why did you have to be included in this?

“Atsushi, think rationally.” His brunette superior warned.

(Yes as if Dazai wasn’t freaking out in the headcanon above)

When they met up with the gang that took you Atsushi was heart broken and his blood was boiling

They had beaten you up and tortured you for god knows how long

Your body looks so weak and bruised and he swore to make them pay

“Let. Her. Go.”

The man laughed loudly and retorted “What would a kid like you do?”

And he saw what a kid like him would do

Each one of them was wincing in pain as Atsushi was approaching you and gently picking you off the ground

“I am sorry I couldn’t stop this from happening...” he said with guilt lacing his words and evident on his face

Even with Yosano healing you

Atsushi was worried and a sad expression was settled on his face since he came back with you

Only difference being that now he was holding onto you for dear life

He was afraid that you would disappear from his arms any moment

“Atsushi baby, I am fine. Look!”

He looked up at you with sad eyes as he remembered how you were an hour ago

“I can’t stand seeing you hurt and I will try my best to never see you like that again.”

His hold on you tightened as he listened to your heart beat

He never wanted it to stop

He placed a soft weak kiss on your cheek as he was barely holding back his emotions from blowing up to the open

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke:

He was known for how strong he was and he was fierce

And that was on his good days or qoute on qoute “good moods”

But what the man just did in front of Akutagawa was something far of getting him in a merciful mood

A spike slicing its way through your stomach

Blood coming out of your mouth as your eyes widen in pain

The sight shocked Akutagawa and even brought to him memories

Very unpleasant memories

His heart filling with unbelievable fury

He used his Rashumon to slice everything and anything in his way

And he made sure that man that hurt you go through hell and back before meeting his fate

After the blood splattering and body shredding that happened

He approached you silently and picked you up

As fast as he could he ran back to the Port Mafia

Hours of waiting for your recovery and consciousness

He was leaning on the wall as he was looking at you, worry buried deep in his iris

However it wasn’t evident to the normal eye

For Akutagawa was always the hard to read type unless he was disgusted or angry

‘What if you weren’t okay?’

‘What if you didn’t make it?’

‘Was he really that weak that he couldn’t protect you?’

‘Is he really going to be the reason you leave this world?’

His thoughts were cut off by the soft muttering of his name from your lips

“Aku...?”

He walked towards you and placed his finger on your neck

Normal heart beating, thank god

(And yes you can measure your heart beat like that, my coach told me that)

He slightly flicked your forehead

“Try not to die, idiot. I’m really not bothered to replace you.”

His voice betraying him as it was cracking at the end

You knew this was rather a bad experience that he doesn’t want to remember ever again

“You need to be more aware of your surroundings and take care of what happens around you, dumbass.”

“Do you really think I would be okay with you leaving me just like that?”

You held his hand and smiled and somehow that managed to calm him

“I am fine now; isn’t that what matters?”

He scoffed and kissed your hand

“As usual tell anyone about what I do for you and you will sleep outside.”

With your usual bratty attitude coming back his heart rests inside

He is glad you are okay

Really glad

copyright © 2020 tender-rosiey

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

[along-came-atsushi]

The way Dazai protects Atsushi

When we imagine someone who is protective, mostly it is a person who bursts into a fit of rage or someone who heroically and willingly throws away their own life if it means to protect others. A good example for this would be Kunikida’s actions on several occasions. Dazai is less a person to obviously show rage or to heroically throw himself in front of someone.

Which doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care at all, it’s quite the contrary. And it’s sometimes very subtle and tricky, because he always has plans within plans and tries to achieve several goals with a single plan.

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I will only focus here on Dazai’s actions that solely have to do with Atsushi. I’m not going to bring up every single hidden agenda or goal Dazai is also trying to achieve.

In addition, this post has been tagged as #Dazatsu just to be safe. But of course it can be read from a platonic POV.

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Beware: Spoilers starting from chapter 83 and for 55 Minutes!

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How Dazai gets Atsushi into the ADA

Dazai practically tricked and then it may seem like he pressured Atsushi into joining the ADA, even after Atsushi already said that he doesn’t want to join:

The reason for Atsushi’s refusal was not that he didn’t want to join, because he just simply didn’t want to join. But because he lacks the self-confidence in taking a task like this. He doesn’t believe in himself and his abilities and thinks he isn’t fit for the job. This lack of self-confidence together with the fact that Atsushi constantly gets pushed by either people around him or his circumstances to keep relying on himself rather than others runs like a red string through his story.

Dazai on the other hand sees a great potential in Atsushi. In the moment where Atsushi saved him from drowning, he already planned to team him up with Akutagawa. Not only because of their abilities and their compatibility in battle. But because Atsushi would be the person to “teach Akutagawa how to put that sword away”. In other words: to value life. Which is something that Dazai wasn’t able to teach Akutagawa (I covered this in another meta and won’t explain it here any further).

Another reason is that the things Dazai states above are simply the truth: If Atsushi doesn’t join, then there is nothing the ADA can do to help him (or it would be much harder and complicated for them). He needs to do everything a normal adult in society has to do, which is harder for Atsushi than other people, since he has been abruptly kicked out of his orphanage without any further help or assistance. Not to mention that he is perceived as a monster and not in control of his own ability, and therefore a wanted criminal and dangerous ability user. This could lead Atsushi in either getting killed or falling into the hands of other shady organizations who have far worse intentions for him. Saying the above is less Dazai trying to manipulate Atsushi and more him just telling what would happen and to be realistic.

Having Atsushi join the ADA for Dazai does not only help Atsushi to live a safer life and make it easier for Dazai to keep an eye out for him, but also to give Atsushi the chance to safe other people in the progress.

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The Entrance Exam

Since Atsushi refused there was no way for Dazai to have him join the ADA the easy way and then only later testing if he really was worthy of being a true member. Just like it has been the case with Dazai’s entrance exam (Dazai freely joined the ADA after being recommended and was perceived as a new member immediately. Only during his first case with Kunikida was he secretly being tested of being worthy, which he succeeded). Therefore, a plan under a pretext was needed in order to test Atsushi and convince him to join.

During the ADA’s meeting for planning Atsushi’s entrance exam (which is told in the first part of the ‘Untold Story of the ADA’ novel) Dazai anticipated that Atsushi would either convince the bomber (played by Tanizaki) or somehow defuse the bomb himself. Neither of his predictions happened, instead Atsushi was willing to sacrifice himself so that he could protect others. This selfless action honestly surprised Dazai, which not many people are able to achieve, because he always predicts their actions:

Since it’s been hinted by Dazai that he already lost other people close to him in his life, even before Ango’s betrayal and Odasaku’s death, Atsushi’s action probably could’ve served as a trigger for him. He had to realize that there is a possibility that Atsushi would sacrifice himself to protect others. Especially since he doesn’t deem his own life as worthy and has been told many times to be useless and to “just die in a ditch somewhere.”

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“Stalking” Higuchi

Dazai immediately recognized Higuchi to be a PM member and that she’s contacting the ADA under disguise for ulterior motives. The scene with Higuchi is a good example that Dazai does many things which either annoys other people (flirting with her) or are seen as him just being lazy and/or fooling around (listening to music and singing), while in reality he is already following a hidden plan.

Flirting with Higuchi distracts her and everyone else from Dazai slipping a wiretap in her jacket. It helps him to let everyone just act naturally without the possibility of revealing anything by accident. Furthermore, it makes people underestimate Dazai, because for everyone else he was just fooling around.

Due to the reason that the PM contacted the ADA under disguise as soon as Atsushi was their new member could have been already suspicious for Dazai, suspecting that it has something to do with Atsushi and was not just a regular attack on the ADA. Later on, this gets confirmed when it’s been stated that The Guild set a bounty on Atsushi for some reason.

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Is Dazai following Atsushi around?

When Atsushi accompanies Ranpo on his murder case Dazai surprisingly shows up:

This meeting could be just a coincidence, of course. After all it’s just Dazai fooling around again (or in this case, trying to commit suicide again). But since the case with Higuchi has shown that Dazai loves to pretend to do something else, when he in reality is following a hidden agenda, it might be that he showed up there on purpose. Maybe just to see how Atsushi was faring and to eventually intervene if something serious would happen (like he did when Atsushi and Akutagawa were fighting for the first time). Especially with the PM on Atsushi’s tail now.

In chapter 84 it has been revealed that Dazai indeed does have an eye on Atsushi. When he can’t do that himself anymore, he makes sure to ask Akutagawa to keep an eye on him instead:

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Going far for Atsushi’s sake

After getting to know about the bounty, Dazai lets himself get captured by the PM on purpose, without informing any other ADA members, and stays inside the prison until seemingly a right time draws near. He is willing to do this, even though he knows full well that he is perceived as a traitor and that certain people will not welcome him with open arms.

When Chuuya mentions that he suspects that Dazai must be here for a certain reason, Dazai then states that he does all of this mostly for Atsushi. He even goes so far as to provoke a second punch in the face from Akutagawa, by belittling him in saying that Atsushi is a better subordinate than him, after Akutagawa threatens to kill Atsushi.

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Probably the most visible scene where Dazai openly shows anger and shock towards someone hurting Atsushi (or hurting someone he cares about in general) is during the incident with Q:

He doesn’t act like this again the second time when Atsushi brings him the doll to nullify Q’s ability, even though the whole city is in chaos. He’s also less concerned about Naomi and Haruno in that moment and more focused on Atsushi during this. Which doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care at all for others, knowing that Naomi and Haruno are able to handle their situation (which is confirmed by them later). But it also shows that Atsushi is his main priority.

Throughout the story Atsushi slowly notices this himself. At first he is hesitant to believe that he is Dazai’s “most trusted subordinate” and worries that Dazai might be mad with him should he go overboard with something (e.g. during 55 Minutes when he was able to surprise Dazai who was hiding in the trash can).

He only ever claims to have Dazai’s trust, if it means to provoke Akutagawa (which he does for a different reason, but I’m not going to expand on this here). Later, he even wonders how Dazai would react/look if Akutagawa came back with the news of him having died: 

Which means that Atsushi’s former mentality of people not caring should he die gets replaced by having someone actually be mad/sad about this.

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Hiding his “dark side”

It may not be that visible in the anime, since some scenes are either left out or interpreted for the sake of jokes. But the manga makes it clear that Dazai struggles with guilt because of his own past (e.g. when Atsushi asks the other ADA members what they’ve done before joining the ADA, aside from everyone else Dazai looks away. This suggests that this question and the closely related memories of it are uncomfortable for him. Another example is his reaction when he asks Kyouka how many people she has killed).

Dazai is well aware that he can’t hide his past from Atsushi forever and that he sooner or later will find out. This is then almost immediately revealed to him by Akutagawa.

However Dazai still tries to hide his “dark side” from Atsushi. Apparently, he doesn’t want him to see that he’s capable of being cruel or that Atsushi may become too aware of anything that could reveal more of Dazai’s past and the things he has done. During certain situations Dazai purposefully doesn’t let Atsushi go or stay with him:

1.) When he pushed Atsushi out of the room to “interrogate” Kouyou:

2.) When he pretended to need to use the bathroom, because he knew they were being followed:

3.) When he meets Ango:

(Even Kouyou comments on how Dazai lets Atsushi out of certain business.)

The reasons for this may be that he’s afraid to reveal this “dark side” of him to Atsushi and that he doesn’t want to drag him into the business of the underworld. It could also be that he’s afraid that Atsushi might see him in a different light and that he’ll turn deprecating towards him. As of now Atsushi doesn’t know the full extent of Dazai’s past and actions. But due the fact that he’s aware that Dazai was a former PM member (an executive even), he must also be aware that some answers will be frightening. Furthermore, he must also already have some ideas about Dazai’s past.

Throughout the story Atsushi has been shown to be sympathetic with different characters, trying to understand their actions or the reason that drives them. Even when these characters fought against or tried to kill him in the past (Kyouka, Lucy, Akutagawa, Fitzgerald, Sigma). Therefore, I doubt that Atsushi will see Dazai in a different/negative light, should his past be fully revealed. But this is something Dazai may not anticipate, since he doesn’t see himself as a good person and as someone worthy of redemption.

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Dazai believes in Atsushi

Dazai has an overwhelming believe in Atsushi and his abilities. He reassures and compliments him from the very beginning:

“Nice, Atsushi. You’re like a real detective already! It’s such a joy to see you grow up so fast!” [After being send back in time] “Ha-ha-ha! I never thought you’d be able to scare me like that! You’ve grown Atsushi!” – 55 Minutes

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“Oooh!” Dazai squealed in excitement. “Look at you, Atsushi! Impressive!” – 55 Minutes

Contrary to Atsushi, who struggles to acknowledge his own self-worth and has little to no faith in his own abilities.

This is the reason why Dazai sometimes pushes Atsushi (not only literally but also figuratively) to do things on his own, whenever he realizes that Atsushi is hesitating. He’s throwing him in at the deep, in order for Atsushi to learn more self-confidence:

He sends him on several missions alone (e.g. sneaking into the Moby Dick) or with other people (e.g. Akutagawa), because he knows that Atsushi is able to do this, even without him:

“[…] It’s up to you to prove the detective agency’s innocence and set us free. You can do it, right?” Atsushi knew – Dazai only asked people if they could do it when he was certain they could. – 55 Minutes

Atsushi’s actions get firmly planned into Dazai’s predictions, knowing that he will choose the right decision:

This great believe in Atsushi gets also noticed by other people (e.g. Mark Twain and Akutagawa):

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In return

Dazai’s positive influence on Atsushi also has a positive effect on his psyche: The headmaster’s voice and image inside his mind – the person who always drags him down, tells him to be useless and that he will “not make it” – slowly gets replaced by Dazai’s voice and image – the person who cheers him up and tells him to believe in himself:

It’s no doubt that Dazai was the person who helped Atsushi to live a better life and he is perceived as “the man who saved me” by Atsushi himself. For this reason and his self-confidence Atsushi admires Dazai and is grateful to him.

But on the other hand, Atsushi was also willing to save Dazai despite his dire situation. Not only does Atsushi put Dazai on a pedestal, it is also Dazai who puts Atsushi on a pedestal and who sees him as the person able to help, protect and maybe even change others.

[alphasmoonlit-selfships]

Hiya! I noticed your f/o take over asks and would like to send some! 🌅,🎢, 💬 With Atsushi! Hope your tiger can answer! :3

The tall, silver haired gifted blinks in curiosity at the ask, smiling with interest, “Well, this is new.” He chuckled as he gives a wave, “I’m guessing by your question, I’m meant to respond instead of Dany.” Atsushi mused as he glanced over to the petite brunette in question, who was busy fussing over her work and unaware of the question sent over.

Atsushi chuckled warmly at this and shakes his head, “Well, I’m sure she won’t mind if I take over for a bit; we are both kind of responsible for this blog.” (Includes Jason too 💖).

“Well let’s jump in shall we! Oh! And before anything, we are in our mid-20’s here! So this is going down memory lane!” 🐯✨

🌅How did you two meet?

Oh wow, this feels like so long ago, almost 6 years to be exact! And it’s actually kind of funny now that I think about it! I’m sure Dany agrees.

The way we meet was actually…kind of similar to my situation, yet it has its key differences. For one, Danielle was more on the run and in hiding, she’d use her shadow ability a lot to steal items from small stores to get her food. She knew how to stay off the radar well enough that we had no idea what we were dealing with when the agency was contacted...

Many dubbed her as a ghost due to her shadow gift, which didn’t help Kunikida’s psyche or patience 😅 but Ranpo soon gave us more details after a good laugh. Explaining that this person was a gifted and had a knack for using her ability at night.

So we took the opportunity to find her; my tiger’s hyper senses helped in tracking her, especially when she took notice of how I was able to pick her out. Taking the lead from Kunikida and Dazai and chasing her to one of the warehouses by the Port.

While my ability at the time was well in picking her out, she still had an advantage using the darkness around the warehouse to traverse through the space without making so much as a sound. Suddenly a white light of something flies by and I’m almost struck with what looked like an arrow, yet it disappeared before I realized. It’s like it came from every direction and there was no sure idea on where she was.

Hmm… even when I tried to talk to her, she refused to appear. Only when I made the effort to fight back did she make some appearance, but just slightly with how quickly she left her ability and returned to it. But I got an upper hand on her once I got an idea of her repetitive jabs. Enough for her to reveal herself to me, but not really her.

Rather she appeared as her wolf, I was almost struck by her appearance, maybe out of surprise and awe than fear. My tiger can attest to the feeling, but we were quick to realize the situation were in and wasn’t the time to really admire a large wolf gifted that wasn’t keen on being captured.

And I will say, at the time I hadn’t transformed into a full grown tiger again, not since the Guild chaos. I had better control over my ability, especially due to the President’s influence, but willing that part of my ability again? I couldn’t in that moment with worry I might lose control. I could feel he wanted to leave and break free to protect me when Danielle’s ability overwhelmed me enough to pin me to the ground.

But I could just tell, if you could believe it, that she didn’t want to hurt me, more than anything, intimidate me into submission and scare me off. Overall, Dany didn’t want to fight, she didn’t want to hurt anyone, and I could see she wasn’t just a confused and uncontrolled animal gifted like I was. She was well-aware and just trying to get by from wherever she was running from.

It was then Kunikida and Dazai had caught up, gun fire seeming to break Danielle’s wolf ability attention from me and towards them. Fear clear as day, before Dazai nullified her ability.

By then, we were surprised by her appearance; clearly not expecting her to be small in stature and features not from around Japan. Needless to say, she didn’t automatically wake up like I had when I was found out about my ability. The nullification from Dazai’s ability taking a toll on her on her psyche and connection to her ability from what she later told me. So we took her back to the Agency...

Sorry, about the detail, but that was just our first unofficial meeting, first fight, I suppose you can say 🤔😅 but our first conversation was actually a few days after. Sadly, Kunikida insisted I be kept out of interrogating her, especially after we all found out Lucy knew her from her previous affiliation with the Guild. Letting her be the one up and front of getting Dany to talk when she woke up.

Which I suppose I understand…I would have liked to ease her into speaking too…I did just fine with Kyouka-chan…until she asked for food with my money… >.> plus my Tiger may have been an influence to want to meet this new animal gifted…

Anyway, we’re finally here, meeting time! Seems like I was the first to unofficially meet her and the last one to properly introduce myself to her 😅 by then, Danielle was given a proper uniform by the agency and more composed than her disheveled figure prior.

Hmm… maybe it’s our current relationship standing that making me think so fondly of her in that moment. Or maybe it’s how I've always seen her in all honesty. I admit I was taken aback by her, compared to how she fought me nights before, her eyes appeared more brighter, a unique violet due to her ability’s influence, yet held…a lot of story in them. She was cute, I admitted to myself at the time, her voice soft and held an accent under the Japanese she spoke.

I’m pretty sure we were both surprised by each other to an extent, likely from our first ever meeting and the underlying curiosity of our abilities… Up until Dany just voiced out her thoughts that I was the one she fought against nights ago… To which I began to apologize because of how we encountered and fought each other 😅

She apologized in return too, hesitant and almost embarrassed from attacking me…of course I didn’t fault her for the action, she was just trying to protect herself. And with the years of knowing her, I understand why she did what she did…

Nonetheless! I’m grateful to have been there to unofficially meet her the first time… I don’t think Dany would be where she would be if we didn’t catch up her, well me, because Dazai-San and Kunikida-kun definitely took their time 😅👀 (don’t let them know I said that!).

🎢What was the first date like?

Oh! 😳 our first date together? 🥰

Wow, I remember being so nervous to even ask out of just…fear of rejection. Of course silly thing to think about now, all things considered. And how I asked her was kind spontaneous and blunt after… a serious mission that Dany got hurt in. Feelings coming up to the surface thinking I was going to lose her without saying how I felt.

She said yes of course, once she was completely healed with Yosano’s ability. Dazai may have had a bit of high encouragement from me on what we could have done through the day and what Dany would have liked going into it. Which honestly would have been a bit to overwhelming for her in all the suggestions Dazai gave. Course what would have I expected from him 😅

Nonetheless, Dany and I went on an exploration through areas of Yokohama she wanted to visit, such as a national park that had a vibrant garden and array of ponds to have a meal in. It was during a nice spring season so not to hot or overbearing. She definitely loved every minute, especially a bit of cloud gazing. We talked about several stories we hadn’t talked about before and a few deep ones too, such as what she use to do with her family as a child and how this kind of surrounding reminded her about her old home.

We even took a walk through a small shopping strip, where I may have jumped into an uncharacteristic-of-me moment to want to buy her anything she found an interest in. To which Dany fussed over me to not spoil her with silly trinkets; “What could I possibly want more when I have the best thing in the world right beside me?” 😳🥰💖

I at least bought her a stuffed animal plush; she loves the soft, soft textured ones; loves running her hands through them or carrying them about our home; she really loves them. May even clip a favorite one to her belt; she definitely still has it somewhere on a shelf in our room. 😊

The rest of day went well into the night, where she took the lead in taking me a bit into the outer ring of Yokohama, where it’s more residential and less bright lights of the city. She surprised me with some stargazing, but also getting a really beautiful view of the city from a viewing platform near a hiking route. I had lived in Yokohama for about 3 years at that point and I was still in awe of the view from afar. Considering this was the first time I was viewing it from this new location, I was in taken almost with emotion.. Hmm, maybe recalling an old comment Dazai-san made about Yokohama being my city to protect...

But I was also in awe by Dany too, who rambled a bit on how she found this place later when she expanded her night runs. There was a soft glow on her that night that I remember and it left me kind of..in a daze ☺️ Normally quiet and not much of a talker, but I really enjoyed being the special one enough to hear more of her speak…I could listen to her for hours much like she tends to do for others a lot.

I recall her being surprised by my staring and may have gotten flustered and nervous for rambling the way she did. How silly of her to assume I wouldn’t mind listening to her talk for hours if she wanted to UwU I kind of took on a leap of confidence then to calm her down, taking a hold of her cheek to let her know what I thought...

Needless to say, she was definitely blushing hard in the twilight night. I, even more so when she caught me off guard to kiss me first… (I wanted to be the one to do so…but I suppose she could have a claim for that >.> but I can say I’ve claimed many more after that 💖🥰).

💬You have any pet names for S/I?

Oh plenty!~ Other than everyone commonly referring her to Dany-san or Danielle, mostly by Kunikida, I tend to call her Dany (affectionately); which now that I think of it, I am the only one that does.

Dazai did once and she kind of bristled at him with a glare, granted he was being his usual..flirtatious self with her 🙄 (I swear he does to tease both of us..)

But personal pet names I often refer to her as “Darling” or “My Darling” especially when she’s very anxious and visibly worried. She does appreciate it during those times the most. I’ve also called her “Love” a few times, but mostly out of teasing impersonation of her accent when she does it, it always makes her laugh, snort laugh too (which is adorable), when I try 🥰.

I also have learned a bit of Spanish through our short year of friendship before we became an official couple, where I’ve gradually learned more 💕. While I may not be up to par with her, I can still hold a bit of a conversation in the language; and in learning, I gave her a pet name of “My Star”, so “Mi Estrella ✨” (I do say it kind of how it sounds from the wording 😅 and not like how she says it, but she loves it nonetheless 🥺 this pet name makes her smile and visibly more affectionate 💕💖). It may also be my tiger ability coming out and saying that nickname to refer to her ability ^^;

I do call her “Mika” sometimes, but only in private and when comforting her… She wasn’t so keen to me calling her that in the beginning due to… Well, it took a lot of time for her to get use to it, even when I told her that if she didn’t want me to, I wouldn’t call her that. But she slowly insisted, eventually becoming more of the endearing name she wanted it to sound like with me, and told me it was okay to call her that. It’s not the most common pet name for her, but she appreciates and often asks me to call her that when she is feeling down and in need of reassurance.

I also call her “Kitten” occasionally, in whatever blissful and relaxing time we have together, private or in public. It definitely confused a few of the others on while I settled on calling her that when she technically is a wolf… but it just stuck and Dany doesn’t seem to mind it all! (The silver haired young man looks thoughtful with a smile, recalling how flustered and how she purrs quietly when he says that to her) If anything I think her wolf likes it too, probably another instance of my tiger talking out of me. 😅✨

Be on the look out for a post she made about that “Kitten” nickname! ✨ it’s been on her drafts for a long while now cause she wanted to include a drawing, which she has but knowing her she wants things to be perfect… Honestly everything she does is just... amazing 💕 She needs to realize that more, I’ll make sure she does UwU 🥰😊!

Thank you for the ask anon! This is the first time I've ever done this and I definitely don't mind accepting any more in the future!

Dany can be very busy sometimes with work and tends to get mentally exhausted very quickly. She also tries so hard to be attentive to things that she forgets to care for herself ;;w;; Anything to lighten the load for My Darling 💖🐯 I know another ask came around! So I'll be sure to answer that as soon as I can! — Atsushi 🐯 🌙

[awkwardbsd]

dazai pls? :)

No problem! I am always happy to receive asks. This one was a little delayed because I napped during the middle of asking it. This is gonna get a little bit long (the other ones were long, but I never put a line whoops). This one gets into both anime (Dead Apple and otherwise) and manga spoiler territory. You have been warned! 

First impression

I’ll be honest, I almost dropped this series a few times because of Dazai. I found the way that they introduced him was very… nonsensical and almost insensitive. It was definitely not what we would qualify as “politically correct” by today’s standards, and his appearance certainly was off-putting as well with the bandages flapping in the wind. He came off as a good-for-nothing scoundrel who was a little distasteful.

Current Impression

Well, he’s certainly changed! He went from being an irresponsible reckless fool to an irresponsible reckless fool with impeccable (and overpowered) intelligence and a purpose! 

Favourite moment

Odasaku’s death scene and really any moments with Odasaku (pre and post-death). I know that those scenes were much more of a highlight for Odasaku, but it was also a pivotal moment for Dazai’s character. 

Idea for a story

I was just talking about this idea today! It was in response to my BSD Questionnaire (which I’m having a lot of fun reading the answers for)

@dreaming-of-butterflies​ actually brought it up again (hehe)

I’m about to go on a bit of a tangent. Forgive my awful writing. The last fanfiction I wrote was for Peppa Pig meeting Dazai. I wish I was kidding, but yeah, my last fanfic was Peppa Pig facing off against Dazai.

It was early on a Saturday afternoon with the exhausted sun shining over Yokohama just before the curtain call which would call it a day. The Detective Agency was slow but still running when a man knocked on the door. He opened it apprehensively.

“Is there anything we can help you with, sir?” Atsushi asked.

The man stumbled back slightly. His voice croaked and trembled, “My name is Eliot… Thomas Stearns Eliot.” He glanced over at Atsushi as if there was something right next to him.

“Is something wrong?” Atsushi asked. He looked over to his side. There was no one there.

“It’s just that…” he slowly pointed, “there is a man there.”

“Pardon–”

“He is there. He is a tall stern man in a white coat. He keeps mouthing over and over again, ‘You cannot forgive me.’”

Atsushi staggered and lost his balance. His hands were trembling. Why? What was this man saying? The man from the orphanage, the headmaster, was there? He was dead! He was ecstatic about it. Words couldn’t form from his mouth.

“Atsushi? What’s wrong?” Tanizaki asked. 

“I knew he was dead. He’s dead.” Atsushi mumbled under his breath.

The man was frazzled, “My ability… it’s called Until Human Voices Wake Us. It requires me to pass on messages from people who are dead. I must say these things or else something within me will vanish. If I ignore a spirit’s request to make contact, I lose a memory from my past. I want to know how to remove it! That’s why I came here! I want this ability gone! It has ruined too many people. I can’t take it anymore.”

“You!” he pointed to Kyouka who was on the opposite side of the room. “You have two people standing by your side. They look just like you.” He paused, “Your parents… they truly loved you. They are so happy for you. They say they are sorry for not being able to stay by your side. They wanted to protect you… they really wanted to protect you.” The man was now crying a little. “They said that they love you more than anything in the world and that they wish that they could’ve done something different than to spare you the pain of witnessing their deaths. ‘Please forgive us Kyouka. We promise to never leave your side. We will always love you.’”

Dazai walked into the room. The man flinched. The man opened his mouth, “There is a man with reddish brown hair next to you.” Dazai’s eyes opened wide. He had eavesdropped on the conversation, but he didn’t know that Odasaku would be at his side, not at a time like this.

“The man standing next to you… he has five kids, four boys and a girl. He’s smiling. He’s saying, ‘I’m proud of you.’” He was about to say more when Dazai placed his hand on the man’s shoulder nullifying his ability. Dazai looked like he had tears in his eye but not a single one was shed.

Unpopular opinion

I wish Ranpo got more of a spotlight than Dazai for his intelligence and capabilities. Ranpo is the smartest, but they always rely on Dazai to compete and solve all these problems. He’s always the one facing off with Fyodor and giving the exposition on “how we solved this”. I want to see Ranpo doing it because we don’t always get enough of it, and Ranpo is more than an ongoing side plot that plays into the main story. We need our crime-solving sleuth back! Dazai can be smart and he can solve things, but let’s not lose focus on the true #1 detective!

Favourite relationship

I can go on about Dazai and Atsushi, but I think that ones really clear on why their dynamic is so great. This time, I’m going to focus on the Dark Era Trio and Odazai!

I’m going to be copying and pasting a lot of my previous post’s points. [Source] (also, sorry for OP because looking back on it, I completely hijacked their post and I’m really sorry for that)

Dazai still lives in the same body and soul that he did when he was in the Mafia. Despite moving from the Port Mafia to the ADA, he couldn’t pull the complete 180 on himself. He still lives in a shadow of his previous actions, and that’s why he truly doesn’t believe he’s a good person.

Odasaku saw that good in Dazai even during his darkest moments. If he didn’t believe in Dazai, he wouldn’t have told him to be on the side that saves people. Odasaku saw Dazai beyond his depression, suicidal urges, and the suffering he’s been through. He trusted him to carry on the legacy he left behind.

Dazai still can’t completely get over the death of his best friend. Look at the first set of screenshots.

Dazai: “Does it look like I’m visiting a grave to you?”Atsushi: “It does. [Why?]”

That look on his face is shock. He is still shaken. He still hangs and loiters by Odasaku’s grave as if he’s still alive. It’s not like he’s expecting him to get up, but he acts like he’s still existing.

Dazai, to me, is one of those people that would buy a crab and a plate of curry. He would place the curry on the gravestone of Odasaku. He eats some of the crab he brought for himself. He brings some alcohol. He talks to him all night and says all that has happened. He talks about the agency, Atsushi, Kunikida, and he talks about how he misses the trio. He admits he didn’t know what Ango has been up to.

Just look at this Wan! cover

Ango himself isn’t over the death either. Ango is the one who covered for the both of them so that Dazai would be able to leave the Mafia.

“I made use of it only once. Four years ago… so that Dazai-kun could live outside the Mafia. I erased his past sins.”“Why did you get your hands dirty only once?”“For a friend who is no longer here. To repent, at least minimally, for my sins to him.”

[Quote Source]

That’s why they’re my favourites!

Favourite headcanon

As previously mentioned, Dazai sits by Oda’s grave and has a meal.

Another mini-excursion because I feel like it. Again, forgive my awful writing because I really can’t write (probably because I don’t read).

“Yo Odasaku!” Dazai leaned against the grave of Sakunosuke Oda. He placed a plate of curry on the opposite side of the grave. Dazai tore open the shell of a crab and began eating it. Two glasses of alcohol were placed.

“Be on the side that saves people,” Dazai mumbled. “You know, the Detective Agency is a lot better than the Mafia! There are all kinds of fun people, and best of all, I don’t have to deal with that asshat Chuuya! You know, I got to blow up his car before I left. Thank goodness for Ango.” He paused and took a bite and a swig. “Speaking of Ango, I still really miss us. Lupin just isn’t the same without you. I haven’t talked to Ango in ages either… the guy works for the government now too.” He sighed then smiled, “But yeah, the Detective Agency is great! Chuuya isn’t there, Ranpo is the world’s greatest detective, I get to mess with Kunikida, Shachou is so cool, Yosano used to be in the Mafia but managed to escape, and Atsushi… you would love Atsushi! He’s so naive and difficult, he cries so often, but his heart… it reminds me of yours.”

[chuuyazai]

Soukoku 91. THANK YOU!

AHHHH No love! Thankyou!!! I must be doing something right in life for you guys to keep requestinglittle drabbles from me and I can’t thank you enough!! I hope I’m writing Soukokualright though and I hope you like it!! (Childhood friends!AU ahead!!) I wantedto make this one a little (okay it’s a lot) longer than the others so that’s whyit took a little longer and it’s also in a slightly different format than how Idid the other requests so I really really hope you like it! :D (pleasecriticize me if you don’t) (under the cut for length)

91. “Can I hold your hand?”

Word Count: 1595

They were six when they met each other for the very firsttime. Chuuya was a shy kid, his parents rarely home to play with him. His fatherworked during the day and his mother during the night so she would always be asleepwhile her husband was at work. He was quite mature for his age, though, as he wastaught to be independent as soon as he was able to speak coherently. However,he was always lonely. His neighborhood did not have many children close to hisage for him to play with. That is, until their neighbors moved out and a newfamily move in.

Well, Chuuya couldn’t really call the people who moved intothe house next door a true family as there were not complete. It was just awoman and a boy who looked to be around his age, which made Chuuya perk up inexcitement. However, since he was always alone as a child, he was quite scaredabout talking to new people and, thus, was terrible at making friends. He didn’thave to make the first move though. As he was staring at the two through thewindow, the boy looked up and met his eyes, smiling and waving. Chuuya was surprisedat how nice the boy was being and, before he knew it, he saw the boy sprintacross the yard and up to his front door, knocking on it and breaking Chuuyaout of his trance. He opened the door and poked his head through, making sureto keep the rest of his body hidden behind it.

“H-hello?” Chuuya chided himself for stuttering. Surely theother would make fun of him for it and there goes his chance to make a friend.However, to his surprise, the other just smiled widely.

“Hi there! I’m Dazai Osamu and I’ll be your new neighbor andfriend!” the boy – Dazai – exclaimed excitedly, taking Chuuya aback by his enthusiasm.

“Nakahara Chuuya. It’s nice to meet you,” he replied, stillslightly wary but his reply made Dazai’s smile even wider.

“I would love to play with you right now but I have to helpmy mom with unpacking. We’ll play afterwards okay? By Chuuya!” Dazai waved andran back to his own house where his mother was watching the interaction,smiling at her son’s antics. Chuuya hoped they would be fast friends.

–

His wish came true. Over the next four years, the two werepractically inseparable. They went to school together, played together, and Chuuyabasically lived at Dazai’s house, which became more of a home to him than hisown. He was over there constantly and slept over multiple times a week. Dazaiwas thrilled and his mother loved Chuuya like he was her own son. He was stillcurios as to where his father was but never asked in case it was a sensitive topic.However, this was one of the nights were he ran over to their house in a panic.He banged on the door, knowing that Dazai was there but his mother was at work.He pounded loudly until the door was open and a worried boy was on the otherside.

“Chuuya what’s wrong? It’s one in the morning,” Dazai questionedrubbing the sleep out of his eyes but letting the other in nonetheless.

Chuuya, breathless, explained. “You won’t believe what justhappened! Stuff I touch keeps floating up in the air!”

Dazai blinked, not knowing how to respond. It wasn’tcompletely unheard of for people to have abilitiesbut it was very rare and most people thought that it was a hoax. Dazai andChuuya would stay up late wondering what kind of ability they would have ifthey were to ever be one of the special few but never did they ever expect eitherof them to actually develop one.Dazai was at a loss for words.

“Here let me show you!” Chuuya grabbed the vase off the sidetable and began to concentrate. He let go of the vase and Dazai panicked.

“Stop! That’s my mom’s favori-“ He froze, watching as thevase was suspended in the air. After a few seconds, Chuuya grabbed the vase andplaced it back on the table, breathing out a sigh as he became slightly tired. “Woah.”

“Yeah” Chuuya said nervously, smiling slightly.

“You’re so cool!!” Chuuya blushed at the compliment whileDazai started to ramble about how amazing that power was. They talked all nightabout it and eventually migrated up to Dazai’s room where they fell asleep.However, it was restless night for Chuuya. He was dreaming about his new foundability but they were dark dreams, nightmares, involving him hurting the peoplehe cares about. Hurting Dazai. He woke up in a start, breathing heavily and hearingsomeone calling his name but he could not find the source of the yelling. Helooked around to try to find his friend when he noticed that most of theobjects in the room were suspended in the air. Chuuya began to freak out somemore. His nightmare was coming true and he didn’t know how to stop it. He sawthat Dazai was being pinned to the wall by his desk, which was curiously not floatingin the air like the rest of the furniture.

“Take my hand!” Dazai was repeating over and over again. “Youneed to calm down Chuuya. Take my hand! Trust me!”

Chuuya ran over to Dazai and grabbed his hand, tears flowingsteadily from his eyes out of fear and guilt. Suddenly, everything fell atonce. Dazai did not have a lot of valuable objects so nothing too important wasbroken in the fall. After catching their breaths for a moment, they moved thedesk, unpinning Dazai. When his friend was free, Chuuya launched himself at theother.

“I’m so sorry Osamu. I almost hurt you. I don’t want thispower anymore.”

Dazai rubbed his back, whispering words of encouragement andforgiveness and Chuuya drifted off to a dreamless sleep.

–

After that day, Dazai became very protective of the other.If he ever saw Chuuya become nervous or angry or show any intense emotions hewould as a very simple question that Chuuya always said yes to and it seemed toalways calm him down.

“Can I hold your hand?”

Throughout the years, Chuuya would ask that same questionwhen he could feel his power get out of control. Eventually they realized thatthat was Dazai’s ability, he could nullify other’s abilities. This became helpfulin high school when hormones were running wild and Chuuya lost control of his powersin his sleep, which only happened the one time before, a few more times than hewould like to admit. Dazai wouldn’t need to wake him, only touch him. They gotinto the habit of cuddling when they sleep now just to be on the safe side.

They grew impossibly close over the years. However, anotherthing grew stronger, Chuuya’s feelings towards Dazai. He realized it after graduatinghigh school. He was afraid that college would tear them apart and he realizedthat he didn’t want to live without the other. This thought shocked him when herealized that there were romantic notions tied to the thought. He thought aboutit for a few days and ignored Dazai during that time. After a week of ponderingwhether or not he should ruin his friendship with the other, he made up hismind. He walked over to next door and opened it with his spare key he had for emergencies.He walked up to Dazai’s room, not bothering to knock, as he opened the door andwas met with an angry and relieved Dazai who strode over to him.

“It’s about time! Where have you been all week? Why were youignoring me? Did I do something wrong? Tell me Chu-“

“Can I hold your hand?” It was a question neither had to askin over a year. Dazai was taken aback but nodded nonetheless. Chuuya asked thisbecause he could feel how nervous he was and Dazai always was able to calm himdown, not just calm his power but his emotions as well. He led them over to thebed and sat down, tugging the other to sit next to him. They were quiet for afew minutes, Chuuya looking at the floor and Dazai looking at him.

“What’s wrong Chuuya?”

“I like you,” he blurted out before he could talk himselfout of it. Dazai blinked in surprise but did not let go of his hand. Instead,he gripped it tighter. Chuuya looked up to find his crush with a blinding smileon his face.

“It’s about time!”

Chuuya scowled. “What is that supposed to mean idiot?!”

Dazai chuckled and let go of the other’s hand, wrapping hisarms around his neck and pulling him into a hug instead, causing Chuuya toblush. “It means I like you too Chuuya.”

He relaxed into the hug and wrapped his arms around theother’s waist, smiling contently. Dazai pulled away abruptly, taking Chuuya’shand again and pulling them to both stand, earning a startled shriek from theshorter.

“What are you doing?!”

“Let’s go on a date!”

“Right now?!”

“YES!!!” Dazai pulled the other through the house, barelystopping to put on shoes, and jumping into the car.

Chuuya laughed at his antics, realizing that he has freereign to hold Dazai’s hand whenever he wanted and would save their question foremergencies only from now on.

~Send me a prompt and a pairing~