#they HATED each other they WANTED each other they DEVOURED each other…

[marsdql]

Never Really Over [P.SH]

synopsis: No matter how many times you and Sunghoon break up, you always find your way back to each other. Love, obsession, or something darker—you’re too deep to escape, and he refuses to let you go.

toxic!Ex!Sunghoon × Reader | g: Angst, Toxic Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Slight Smut | cw: Toxic relationship dynamics, possessiveness, jealousy, arguments, implied smut, emotional manipulation, obsession, mild cursing | wc: 0.6k | @teddybeartaetae

You don’t want to open the door.

You shouldn’t open the door.

But you do. Because it’s him.

Sunghoon stands there, soaking wet from the rain, his breathing uneven like he’s been running. His knuckles are red, split in some places, like he’s punched a wall—or maybe something worse. His jaw is tight, eyes clouded with something that makes your stomach twist.

Desperation.

“You blocked me.” His voice is hoarse, accusation laced in every syllable.

“I had to.” Your grip on the doorknob tightens. “I can’t do this anymore, Sunghoon.”

He exhales sharply, his head tilting back like he’s trying to keep himself together, but the second his gaze locks onto yours again, you see it—the cracks in his composure, the madness brewing underneath.

“You say that every time,” he murmurs, stepping closer. You step back, but it doesn’t matter. He’s already inside, kicking the door shut behind him like it’s second nature. Like he still belongs here.

Like you still belong to him.

“I mean it this time.” Your voice wavers. “We ruin each other.”

Sunghoon scoffs, his fingers running through his damp hair. “Then why do you still pick up? Why do you still open the door?” He steps closer, his voice dropping lower, rougher. “Why do you still let me in?”

You don’t have an answer.

His hands find your waist before you can move away, fingers digging into you like he’s afraid you’ll slip through them. His touch is possessive, desperate.

“You’re lying to yourself,” he murmurs, his forehead pressing against yours. “Tell me you don’t miss me. Tell me you don’t think about me every night. Tell me you don’t—”

“Stop.” Your voice cracks, and that’s all it takes. His lips crash onto yours, and you break just as easily as you always do.

His kisses are bruising, hungry—like he’s trying to devour you, trying to punish you for ever thinking you could leave. You push at his chest weakly, but he just grabs your wrists, pinning them against the wall, swallowing your protests with another kiss that makes your knees buckle.

“You don’t get to leave me,” he whispers, pressing his body flush against yours. His breath is hot against your skin, sending shivers down your spine. “You’re mine. You’ve always been mine.”

Tears sting your eyes because you know he’s right.

And that’s the worst part.

You’ve tried. God, you’ve tried. You’ve blocked him, ignored him, sworn you’d never fall back into his arms again—but you always do. Because Sunghoon isn’t just a person to you. He’s an addiction. A poison in your bloodstream that you can’t purge. As much as you hate it, you know you’re the only one allowing yourself to keep going back to him.

“You don’t get to move on,” he breathes, his lips ghosting over your jaw. “You don’t get to forget me.”

“I want to,” you whisper, your voice breaking.

He shakes his head, a humorless chuckle slipping past his lips as he presses kisses down your neck, slow and possessive. “Liar.”

You let out a shaky breath, your hands curling into fists. “We’re not good for each other, Sunghoon.”

“I don’t care.” His hands trail lower, gripping your waist even tighter. “I don’t want good. I want you.”

It’s sick. It’s twisted. But when he lifts you into his arms and carries you to the bedroom, you don’t stop him.

Because he’s right.

It was never really over.

And deep down, you know it never will be.

[super-nova5045]

snowjanus nation can we like toxic yaoi it up in the snowjanus ao3 tag…all we’re getting is fix it fics and stuff and while there’s nothing WRONG with that pleaseeeee can we talk abt how the toxic homoerotic competitive codependent doomed best friendship fucked them up so badly one of them DIED and the other literally became an EVIL DICTATOR…like that is next level toxic. radioactive yaoi. nuclear, even.

anyways this is me begging fanfic writers to put more of an emphasis on the Doomed Homoerotic Best Friendship of it all…never getting their catharsis so why should we. haunted by what could’ve been. let me COOK

[lovesickeros]

popping in randomly after almost an entire month just to talk non stop about the tsaritsa again everyone sit down.

specifically just thinking about the implications of tsaritsa's ideals originally being about love + the abandonment of those ideals to complete her goal of, presumably, destroying Celestia or whatever she's cooking up. to the point even her people don't love her and I probably don't even remember a time her ideals were of love. now it's all just ice and snow and cold.

which makes romantic fics w her even funnier because she's purposely removed this part of herself and suddenly reader walks into teyvat like they own the place (they do) and I can only imagine her reaction. angry, probably. because why you? what are you doing to her that's caused her hundreds of years of strict adherence to rejecting "love" both from others and to others to just. collapse. absolute shattering of her world and you probably don't even know it bc if nothing else she's good at hiding it. a lot of denial. tries to pick you apart and see what's makes you so different.

and oh she just hates it. she loathes it.

basically one sided enemies to lover trope because she can't stand you for a while but if you stick around she starts warming up to you and it makes it WORSE. so much worse. tries to distance herself but your just everywhere and it gets on her nerves because why does she love you? she isn't capable of love, not anymore. she thought she was.

g-d forbid one of the harbingers or PIERRO notices she'd never live it down. might even consider the implications of just killing you (she doesnt). worse if you know about it and act like a brat she will lose her damn mind

just the tsaritsa being an absolutely horrible mess internally.

[astracora]

Etched into the fabric of his soul!! 😭😭😭💖💖💖💖💖

[sovamurka]

Argh, still in pain thinking about how beautiful it is that Ice Fantasy actually entirely dedicates itself to honouring such wonderful and undoing thing known as love.

[spokenforyou]

xavier x fem reader

MISTY SILHOUETTE

synopsis: xavier is in another jealous mood, so he takes it out on you in return notes: inspired by the newest cards, uses some lines! line credit to INFOLD. warnings: vulgarity, nsfw, swearing, unprotected, creampie, marks of ownership, f receiving, jealousy, possession wc: 1.9k

[minors don’t interact… by choosing to interact with this content, you are consenting to view something that is not appropriate and nsfw despite warnings!]

Xavier is having yet another one of his temper tantrums. It’s gone on a lot and it grows on your nerves over time.

He stands in front of you, trimming a plant he picked up earlier.

“This plant needs some trimming.” He mumbles under his breath and you sigh as he continues to trim, leaves falling to the floor beneath your feet.

You only assume he’s still irritated at the fact that the neighbor shows a friendly interest in you.

You sit up in your seat and tap his butt with your foot, understanding what’s going through his mind

“Xavier. Don’t take your frustration out on the plants. They’re innocent.” You pat his butt again until he turns around.

A plain look on his face, cheeks flushed, shirt undone, and darkness in his blue eyes.

“Where should I put it then?” Xavier looks down at you and lifts a brow as he steps forward.

His hand glides up your leg and under your dress, a gasp leaving your lips at the sudden touch.

Your arms latch onto his shoulders and he lifts you up.

“Don’t use the same trick twice. It loses its effectiveness.” His eyes bore into yours and he smiles.

“Then what are you suggesting?” You whisper, and he puts you down, turning you to face the window.

Xavier’s palm comes up and lands on the glass beside you while one hand traces up to cup your breast. The thick fabric making it hard to feel what he wants, but he gets an idea of it as they’ve been in his hands many times before.

“Didn’t you say I shouldn’t take it out on the plants? What exactly did I do wrong?” His soft voice rings through your ears and he presses his chin on your shoulder. His touch was soft compared to his apparent mood.

“Are you pretending to be mad, Xavier?” You reach up and lift his head off your shoulder, running your fingers along his jaw.

He moves his arm and yanks your hand away, pressing it to the glass, before it returns position to your breast.

“I thought you were the type to calm down quickly, Xav…” You chuckle, and he presses himself against you, bending you a bit.

“Depends on whom I’m with, and it also depends on how I want to calm myself down…” His lips tease your ear.

You feel his growing arousal against you and he presses kisses to your neck, whispering as he does so.

“I hate when that bastard puts his eyes on you.” Xavier murmurs against your skin, his hands gripping your hips.

His sudden language takes you off guard and you can only feel him growing more heated.

“He was just being nice…” You let out the tiniest whine as he bites down.

“Nice, my ass.” He leans back and turns your head to look you in the eyes.

He clearly didn’t like the thought of another man talking to you, even if it was for a friendly chat. Wanting your eyes on him at all times, needy, clingy.

“You’re mine.” Xavier murmurs as pulls you flush up against him, his thigh slotting between your legs.

His lips crash onto yours, hand still comforting your jaw to face his, and he rocks against you as he kisses you like his life depends on it… As if your neighbor Charlie was here watching it all unfold.

Tongues twisting and dancing against each other while his other hand come to rest on the windowsill.

He moves it briefly and travels it up your arms, intertwining your hands together.

The kiss goes on for what feels like an eternity before he pulls away, the two of you panting from such a simple thing of devouring each other.

“Xav… There’s something off about you today…” you murmur and he nods.

“I agree. It’s strange…” Xavier’s hand still holds your jaw as he turns it and kisses your neck once again gently.

“It looks like I won’t be easily satisfied tonight.” He whispers before turning you and lifting you in his arms once more.

He carries you to the loveseat with a smirk as he drops you, lips going to your cheek, neck, and ear. One hand cups the back of your head and the other glides back under your dress.

“Xav, we can’t do it here…” Your hand pulls his away, and he gives you a stern look.

“Don’t move.” He suddenly stands and pulls your legs apart. “You said you’d leave me alone if I pushed my luck, right? Well, I’m pushing my luck now… Are you going to ignore me?”

Xavier leans down a bit and looks you dead in the eyes, face red, and chest heaving.

“How could I?” You chuckle and he smirks.

“Right, so you like my possessiveness, huh?” He leans down and nips your earlobe.

“Never said I hated it…” You bring his hand under your dress, running along your panties, and he chuckles darkly, the sound sending a shiver down your spine.

“Naughty girl…” His hands travel higher, toying with the fabric before he finally pulls it down your legs.

“I’m the only one who can touch you like this…” Xavier pulls the dress down next, leaving you with only a bra on. He quickly undoes that as well and you’re suddenly bare.

Giving you no time to protest, he kneels before you. His tongue running over your sensitive skin, exploring your folds. You moan quietly and grip his hair.

“Xav I…” He growls as he hears you mumble.

“You’re mine…” He growls against your skin, hands running up your thighs as he devours you. Pulling away once more, he looks up at you.

“And I don’t share pretty…” Diving back in he whines and you swear you see his eyes roll back.

His tongue darting for your silky folds, bliss overtaking his senses. You were a sight, and it was something he’d never get bored with seeing, tasting, or hearing.

Xavier moans against you and brings a hand down to palm himself through his tight pants.

“Mmm, we gotta let him hear you. Think these walls are soundproof or what?” He suddenly pulls away with a pop, your slick on his lips and you melt.

“Xavier… No we-” He quickly cuts you off and pulls you off the seat before dragging you to the couch, where there’s room.

He’s not a patient man, and he’s already growing impatient. He pushes you onto the couch and positions himself between your legs.

“You know I was gonna take things slow, but I don’t think that’s gonna work, baby.” He quickly pulls a condom out of his pocket, and you mentally question why he has it in there.

“Spread for me pretty girl…” He parts your legs, and he quickly takes off his clothes, standing to assist. Once bare, he gets back into position and rolls the condom on.

“Good girl, you look so pretty. All mine.” Xavier lines himself up with your entrance, sliding in with ease.

He groans at the feel of you around him. “Fuck… You feel so good. Mmm, bet Charlie wishes he could feel you like this.” He smirks down at you as he finally bottoms out.

His hips pull back before slamming back against you and you let out a loud moan. A groan from him follows.

“I’m the only man who’s getting this kind of treatment from you, right?” He murmurs against your neck as he continues his rhythm.

“Of course, Xav…” Letting out a breathy whisper, you wrap your arms around his broad back.

He moves his mouth to your collarbone, leaving bite marks and love bites all over your skin purposefully. Everyone will know you're his once they lay eyes on your skin.

You let out loud moans and cries as he continues the rough but tender pace. Every time you cry his name, it makes him possessive.

“Louder, I want to hear you…” He nips at your jaw, his lips hungry for more, needing to be on your body.

Xavier suddenly pulls you up and leans back, situating you on his lap, not slipping out of you once.

He bounces you and latches onto your hard peak, biting and sucking, earning more cries. You were certain the neighbors could hear you and you feel a sort of excitement and embarrassment.

“Ride me…” He whispers against your breast, his hands on your hips to help you keep steady and you listen.

Bouncing on him, the slaps of skin fill the room and pants from the two of you.

“Just like that…” He groans as you grind down on him, his grip on your hips tightening. Pulling away from your bruised nipple, he directs attention to the other. You whine and arch against him, pushing further into his mouth.

“Xav…” Moans leave your lips and he releases you with a pop, running his finger over your bruised skin.

Xavier suddenly lifts you up a bit and thrusts up into you, leaving the two of you breathless. You nearly collapse and he holds you against him.

“Xavier… The condom, take it off. I wanna feel you.” You whine against his neck and he groans before pausing.

He looks up at you through hooded eyes and he whispers. “…Are you sure?”

You nod, and he bites his lip. “I’m on birth control, Xav, it’s okay.” You offer a smile and he nods before gently lifting you off him.

He hovers you above him as he pulls it off. His cock hardens even more as the cold air hits him, a hiss leaving his mouth. Pre-cum coating his length, he strokes a few times before lowering you back down.

You two let out loud gasps as you feel each other bare. You move against him and he nods, “Mmm…”

He keeps one hand on your hip to steady you as his other explores your body, his touches almost desperate. Bodies moving together you both fill the room with moans, needy ones from him.

Your body tightens, and you feel a pit forming in your stomach. “Xavier, I’m not gonna last much longer.” You lean down and press kisses to his neck.

“Neither am I, I’m so close baby…” He mutters, almost a needy whine and you feel your stomach twist. His fingers going down to rub your clit in time with the pulsing of your body.

His fingers were all it took and you’re sent over the edge of oblivion. Xavier groans and finishes with you. His hand pulls away from your clit and he wraps his arms around your back.

You collapse into his arms and he holds you while you both ride through your climaxes. His cock throbs inside of you as he fills your womb, tip pressing to your cervix.

“Ah…” You let out a whine and he smirks, sweat dripping.

“So good baby…” He rubs your back as you catch your breath. You pull back and his gaze drifts over your face in admiration.

“Xavier…” you mutter, and he tucks a piece of your tousled, wet hair behind your ear.

“Will you… Will you only be like this when you’re upset?” You run your fingers gently across his jaw and he flutters his eyes shut.

“Will you always comfort me this way?” He smiles and leans in, kissing you, tangling your tongue with him once again.

The kiss was tender and endearing, pushing his love into it. And you the same. Your two bodies heat as you embrace each other.

After kissing a bit, he pulls you off him and lays you down on the couch beside him. Xavier gets up and heads to the bathroom, coming back with a cloth.

He quickly wipes the mess between your legs and takes it to the laundry room before returning to you.

His arms wrap around you and he pulls a throw blanket from the arm of the couch, throwing it over the two of you.

“You’ll never leave me, right?” He looks over at you and you shake your head with a look of love.

“I’ll never leave you.”

[sanemistar]

kissable lips — katsuki b.

contains ★ katsuki (post timeskip) x fem!reader (no pronouns used), fluff, suggestive (+17 only), making out, nothing too explicit but still, very slight swearing, rivals to lovers, 0.8k+ wc. ﾉ requested for my milestone event.

event m.list ★ mha m.list

tension filled the surrounding air, sounds of racing heartbeats and heavy breathings echoed through the empty room. you were pinned against the wall as katsuki hovered on top of you, sending shivers all over your back the moment it made contact with the cold surface.

his rough hands gripped your neck tightly, stopping you from writhing and squirming underneath him. keeping you in place as his lips continuously smashed against yours. teeth clashing every time you kissed as he hungrily devoured your lips, not stopping for even a moment to let you breathe. he was forcing you to catch up to his very fast pace, which was quite hard at first. but when you matched his pace, everything felt so heavenly.

you felt his hands move from your neck down to your waist, exploring every inch of your skin. you held onto him tightly for dear life. adrenaline rushed through your blood while your arms securely wrapped themselves around his neck as if it was the most natural thing to do, pulling him even closer as your fingertips ran through the locks of his spiky, blond hair. ruffling it until it became even more disheveled than it was.

if you were told earlier that you'd be here passionately making out with not only one of the best pro heroes, but also your very own rival. you'd simply call it a joke and laugh it off. you just couldn't imagine it happening, not even in your wildest dreams. you two hated each other’s guts, and your only goal was to surpass the other.

however, to your surprise, it happened. and you hated to admit it, but it was far better than you would've ever imagined. you couldn't pinpoint the reason why you were enjoying it, but one thing you knew for sure was that you wanted it, dare to say that you wanted even more. it awakened an unknown desire in you that you’d never known of before, or maybe it had been there all along and you hadn’t noticed until then.

at that moment, the only things that filled your head, occupying your mind completely were thoughts of katsuki and how he held you in his arms as he covered you in kisses, his enticing taste that had you craving for more. your train of thoughts was abruptly cut short when he finally pulled away after what had seemed like an eternity.

your half opened, hazy eyes were caught in his gaze, your lips were all red and swollen, head still dizzy and light. your chest rapidly moved up and down, still trying to catch your breath after having such an intense make-out session.

“katsuki..” his name rolled off your lips in a faint, breathless tone.

your body lost composure and you almost fell to the ground due to your knees getting weak and shaky from all that tension and intensity. you leaned on the wall for support, since you had very little to no strength left to stand on your own.

"shit,” his voice was all low and hoarse, his hot breath fanned against your flushed cheeks as your lips were still slightly parted.

“you moron, if you keep callin’ my name like this while makin’ that face, i might go insane.” he groaned, and your face reddened even more at his words as you wondered what kind of face you were making at that moment.

“why did you of all people have to have the most kissable lips?” katsuki mumbled, but it was loud enough for you to hear. a hint of crimson red was seen on his cheeks as his eyebrows furrowed slightly, it was such a rare sight to see. and you took the time to carve it clearly in the back of your mind.

“hmmm…” you hummed sweetly, your hand traced down to his chest as your fingers ran up and down his shirt, leaving delicate touches. you leaned over and whispered softly against his ears.

“my lips aren’t the only kissable parts i have.”

you knew you were being bold there, a little too bold even. but you wanted to tease him as you tried to push him to his limit, wanting to know what would happen if he were to go insane.

“imma ‘bout to shut you up ‘nd make you regret that fuckin’ cocky attitude of yours.” katsuki was determined to shut you up, and you best believe that he did.

𝜗𝜚 taglist: @sylusdoll @ayrastv @hanaeriin @spkyssn @stunies @17020 @kalsplace

[jinwoosbabyboo]

"Love and Brat Taming"

How I imagine the LADS Men brat tame and the type of dom that they are. Artwork @/osk_purinnumee on twitter ‼️ MDNI ‼️ This for the freak nasty mfs in my inbox … I love y’all hope you can lucid dream about this 😘

Zayne

Type: Edging | Voyeurism | Restraints | Temperature play??

Sweet stoic Zayne....Mr. "watch your hands" in public but completely different behind closed doors. Now let's say you decided to spend all afternoon being very handsy. He would warn you multiple times and of course you'd keep going even when he glared at you.

I feel like Zayne is definitely the type to .... watch. He would one thow-wow percent sit you on his lap with your hands tied in front of you and make you play with yourself while he watched.

What did he use to tie your hands? The tie that you kept yanking on all day in public to whisper in his ear.

"Since you can't control your hands I'll control them for you" He would watch you play and squirm on his lap and the minute he sees you're on the brink of climax he'd whisper a stern "Stop." snatching your wrists away, holding them above your head in one hand, making you whine. "Deep breaths ... there you go ... now start again"

He would do this again ... and again ... and again until you're spouting apologies and begging him to let you cum. He's not rough as a matter of fact he's so gentle it almost makes this punishment that much hotter, I mean worse.

Don't forget he's touch starved so while you're playing he's busy having his fun exploring your body stimulating every part of you. He'd go back and forth from just watching you to devouring your neck and pinching your nipples using his evol make them pebble faster and then taking them into his warm mouth.

By the time he lets you cum you're a sweaty puddle of pure bliss. He'd definitely talk you through it and end it with "next time heed when you've been warned"

Now next time he tells you to watch your hands you're torn between wanting this punishment again or wanting the sweet Zayne that gives you what you want without making you beg.

Sir?! Wtf you mean heed when I've been warned I'm acting up on your next day off fym

Rafayel

Type: Sense Deprivation | Overstimulation | Manhandling | Breeding Kink

Raf is the type of tamer who makes sure you can't walk and you're sore as hell the next day. He's merciless. He takes you how he wants you.

For example...

"Will you like me no matter what I become?" You promised. Such an innocent question. No.

You should have read the fine print because you had no idea it included the dominant powerhouse he'd become when you decided to ignore him after you went to bed mad at him and proceeded to ignore him for a full day.

"Don't play with me we don't do that we don't go to bed upset with each other because shit like this happens" He doesn't give more than half of a warning. He gives just one and that's it and its hardly a warning.

Raf doesn't get upset with you often but he's a whole different person when he does. He is definitely the type to blindfold you and tells you to be a good girl and no touching. "Keep your hands above your head"

He'd flip you back and forth between being sprawled out on your back and being flat on your stomach with a pillow tucked under your hips and much more. You're getting fucking rag dolled so hold on tight.

To start he would touch you everywhere except where you wanted most however he still would have you dripping wet and I mean dripping. I imagine once he gets you to that point he's the type to eat you out while making you explain why you decided to ignore him when you know he hates it. He'd edge you a little every time your hands strayed too close.

You would have absolutely no good reason for ignoring him for a whole day on purpose so he'd keep going snatching orgasm after orgasm from you until you're pushing his head away. Big mistake because he said no touching and keep your hands above your head. Be ready to get pounded into the mattress until dawn. For sure the type to fill you up over and over again just to watch it drip out so he can push it back in with his fingers.

"Raf I can't- " he'd cut you off "You can take it ... gimme one more I know you can do it" he would make sure you can't walk the next day so you have to spend the entire day with him to make up for lost time.

I need this man to take a sip of wine and let it flow into my mouth through a kiss and bite my lip after.

Xavier

Type: Edging | Bondage | Spanking | Dacryphilia | Sadism

Alright I know you just read sadism and you wanna jump me now let me explain hold on HOLD ON! Relax! Put the bricks and tomatoes down let me explain. I can feel it in my BONE MARROW that Xavier knows how to perfectly mix pleasure and pain. He's literally likes it rough talking about some "You'll have to do it harder" bro imagine him being able to do it harder to his girl? HES ON THAT ! Man I kinda just wanna yap about him.

He would give you a safe word he would immediately stop if you use it don't worry. He's a calm cool collected Prince that fucks you like you're a slut. He doesn't give you a warning because he knows that you know better.

If you decided to test his patience and be a brat ALL DAY he's throwing you over his lap and spanking your ass until it's red while he's two knuckles deep inside of you and that's not even the main course.

He would tie your hands together (Just like he's threatened multiple times). He would definitely tie them to the headboard and he'd eat you until you're crying from pleasure, but no you're not allowed to cum yet. "You're so pretty like this" as he wipes your tears before going back to nip and bite at your thighs.

He would rag doll you as well untying you and flipping you over into doggy style and just teases you by rubbing his tip against your folds and just slightly pushing in before backing out and continuing his teasing giving your ass solid slaps when you push your hips back at him.

He would edge your soul out of you for hours and he's gonna wake you up a few hours later with his tongue after you fall asleep.

I need Xavier to rag doll me expeditiously.

Sylus

Type: Bondage | Spanking | Dacryphilia | Overstimulation | Breath Play

I know y'all have seen that one picture pose called "Dancing with you" and Sylus has his hand around your throat?????? What are we dancing to???? Are we naked????

Anyway....

Now maybe this is self indulgent but he's definitely using his evol to hold you in whatever position he wants you in. Since you couldn't listen to him we won't listen to you. He's two knuckles deep in you and is making you do all the work. He would have you ride his hand and make you work for it while he has the other wrapped around your throat cutting off your air and right when you cum he'd let go making you see stars.

Did he just make you experience euphoria?? You bet your ass he did.

He's not done with you though don't forget you were a brat throwing a fit in the middle of his meeting and couldn't keep your hands to yourself. He would eat you out till you're in tears "Keep your eyes on me" the second your head fell back in bliss he would stop causing you to snap your head up. "I gave you simple instructions sweetie" When you hit that point where you start trying to run from him he would stand up and tell you to "Keep it wet you know what to do" (Shout out Professor Cal) releasing only one of your hands and leaving to go finish his meeting.

YES! He would definitely tell his business call or whatever to give him a minute and he'd handle you then head back. Once he's done he's coming back and teasing you with his tip with his hand around your throat again. He doesn't mind spending the whole night taming you.

Side note: Sylus hates to see you cry .... unless you're crying from pleasure. "Fuck you're beautiful like this" he'd say and he'd kiss your tears as they run down your cheeks. Something about that dazed-euphoric look in your watery eyes and your wet cheeks gets his Ca-Cawk jumpin'!

I need Sylus to wrap those big ol hands around my throat and tell me "Relax you can take it princess"

[onlymimiwastaken]

Warrior Penelope stuff cause I've been listening to too many EPIC genderbent covers, and I wanted to give my take on it (also cuz I kinda want to draw it one day)

- Ares as Penelope's patron, absolutely! But Ares didn't have a huge cult in Sparta, although he wasn't hated. So my lore take version thing is that ATHENA wanted to be Penelope's patron (she had already an eye on Ody kinda) but Ares saw his chance, got to it first and became attached to Penelope without wanting to admit it, also because she saw the good and useful in him. Athena still watches over Penelope (especially after her and Ares platonically break up, which she finds really stupid) and is the one who does her best to protect Ithaca while she's gone. She's by Ody's side while he misses his wife and is mostly the reason why the Suitors hadn't taken over yet.

- To get Ares to realize his mistake, Athena tricks him into helping Telemachus defeat Antinous in Little Wolf because free bloodshed, only to end up sensitized by Telemachus because holy shit, my friend's son is here almost dying to this ASSHOLE who thinks he's so much stronger than MY friend the queen and even me like who tf does he think he is. Athena makes Ares fucking rational for once. And maybe even Aphrodite, as well, gets some damn sense in his mind like "they love each other like you and I and my girl is doing her best to get home you're going to apologize rn"

- ctimene holds a claymore double her height with no problems

- penelope is more "cold ruthless" than Odysseus, in a way that she's still poised (until the end or when she's really brought to her knees which is disturbing) while doing merciless stuff. She's emotionless a lot more (just on the surface)

- Ares was the one to give Penelope the idea of going to war instead of Odysseus, for obvious reasons. And Pen is really a mastermind among the Greeks ofc

- Ares and Pen fought in their My Goodbye version because she "held back her power while her friends got devoured" "she didn't even fight Polyphemus, didn't even TRY to kill him" "hid behind her wits to get things done". Because when fighting Polyphemus, she knew that if she tried to kill Polyphemus while he was asleep, they'd be stuck in that cave forever (like in the real Odyssey). And knew that fighting while her friends got killed would slow them down and probably get more people dead. And when they ran away, she didn't go back to kill the Cyclops even if she could've because of yes, mercy, but also because she would've awakened all the other Cyclops and sailing away was faster, better. Ares deemed this cowardice. Crazy thing, since one of the most important things to him is courage.

- Ares overstimates Penelope's power. Like, yes, she's exceptional, but still HUMAN. With her limits. He hasn't dealt with a human personally in years so he doesn't understand this, so his expectations are ridiculously high, which ends up breaking Penelope.

- During 600 strike, Penelope can actually breathe underwater and not hold her breath for such a long time and be fine because she's half naiad (yes, they are fresh water nymphs but still). Also this may make her even stronger around water (to a certain degree, she's still very mortal)

- calypso is pansexual

this is already a lot, ill add more when i think about it lol (also if i realize any of these ideas don't make sense)(check reblogs for more)

[syluss-littlecrow]

diet pepsi

<Zayne x fem!reader>

losing all your innocence in Zayne's backseat 💙

where a night drive with Zayne ends up having you him deciding to find ways to amp up the cold temperatures in his backseat.

genre/warnings: smut, pwp, car sex, semi-public sex, unprotected sex, windows get fogged & car seats get hot, based on the song Diet Pepsi, orgasms, breeding kink (r u surprised at this point), fingering

w/c: 1.7k

a/n: here's a little icy treat for the girlies out there. I actually think this song is so delicious, and I just had to use this for Zayne's fic. Enjoy as always, thank you for reading & supporting 💙

You used to dislike the rainy weather because of the way the wetness and humidity would ruin your plans. Not to mention, you hated getting your hair wet.

The monsoon season is still going strong–some days the rain barely letting the sun shine. 

Well, this was one of those days. 

Zayne’s hands are relaxed on your thigh, managing the steering wheel with one hand.

The rain continues to patter on, filling the car with the sound of rain. It's actually relaxing, you think, especially when Zayne is calmly by your side. 

“You're smiley tonight”, Zayne points out, his eyes not leaving the road.

“How would you know?” You tease. “Your eyes are on the road!”

“I just do. Aren't things like that common when you have a partner? I know you well enough, y/n.” 

A soft squeeze to your thigh. 

He doesn't realise how far up his hand is on your thigh and your heart is suddenly fluttering.

So is your pussy.

You pat your cheeks to calm yourself down. There was something about Zayne just driving you through the rain with his hand squeezing your thigh, and how the whole car smells just like him.

“Are you cold? I feel goosebumps all over your thighs”, Zayne points out, his eyes still on the road.

At the red light, he’s able to focus his attention fully on you.

“I'll increase the heating-” he turns to look at you, noticing the pink that's flushed on your cheeks. 

“I'm still cold”, you half-lie.

“We'll drop by to get some heating packs at the convenience store. Bear with it a little longer”, he comforts you, this time taking your hand in his, pressing his lips against the back of your hand, the warmth spreading all over. 

Suddenly you feel greedy. You want him to kiss more places than just the back of your hand.

Zayne parks at the nearest store, ready to open the doors and leave. The car park is practically empty, with some cars sparsely parked. 

He's about to open the car door until your fingers are curled around his tie. 

“Zayne… could we find…other ways to warm up?” 

It takes seconds for Zayne to catch on quickly. 

Zayne watches you crawl to the backseat, the smell of your perfume and the sight of your dress pushing up, just shy of your panties, makes him breathe a little harder.

He pushes his seat forward, then opens the driver's side of the door. 

While his hands loosens his navy tie, he watches you through the backseat window–the way you stare at him while you roll your lace panties off your legs. 

He swallows hard, still trying to keep his strings of rationale intact. But the way you're fucking teasing him like this can only hold him back so much. 

He slams the car door behind him, trapping both of you in the vehicle, his lips immediately devouring yours so desperately. His requests for more come in soft whimpers. Zayne lets his hands wander all over your body, tugging your dress down past your tits, making you gasp at the cold air that hits you.

His lips travel down your neck, each time his lips leave a blazing trail that melts into your skin. 

“It's cold, Zayne”, you mumble, your hands running through his jet black locks.

“And we’ll warm each other up”, he replies. You feel the warmth of his palm travel dangerously down your thigh to your hips. 

His slender fingers travel down south until he feels your warm and wet pulsing cunt. You watch him wet his fingers with his tongue, then back to his favourite spot. His fingers circle around your wet pussy hole, and then his fingers plunge in, sending electric shocks of pleasure through your spine. He curls his fingers in you, watching you in awe, your hips lifting off the car seat, your moans competing with the wet sounds your cunt is making.

"Look at you, already soaking wet", he teases, making sure you hear the way your cunt squelches when he slowly pulls his fingers out, your juices decorating his fingers, glistening under the dim lights. He makes you watch him lick his tainted fingers clean, the taste of you dusting Zayne's cheeks a soft shade of red.

"Zayne, please", your fingers tug against the sleeve of his dress shirt. "It's not enough."

Zayne chuckles, and he pushes your legs further apart. "Of course it isn't. I know your body best, don't I?" He applies pressure on your clit with his thumb, and another jolt of electricity flutters through your spine.

Zayne doesn't waste much time to remove his trousers. Despite his towering height, he's able to smoothly strip himself without hitting his head on the roof of the car. What other skills does this man have?

Well, you didn't have the time to make guesses considering Zayne was demanding your attention on him, leaning in for more greedy kisses. You hear his soft mutters as he's pressing himself against you, edging himself against you with his wet cock.

"I love it when you wear lipstick. It makes me want to ruin it so much."

His tongue feels hot against yours. It's so intoxicatingly good. Was it because it was still raining? Was it because he's about to fuck the lights out of you in his car? Whatever it is--he just feels so fucking good on you.

"I'm gonna enter you now", he says, waiting for you to give the green light. You nod, taking his palm onto your cheek.

Zayne lines himself right at your pussy hole, and he pushes himself into you. His groans sound so pretty when he's getting fucked out like this.

He watches the way his cock slowly stretches you open, trying to fit all of him in. The warmth of your cunt is just sucking him in, so fucking perfect for the rainy weather. 

You're seeing stars. Zayne feels so big and thick in you and you have to remind yourself to fucking breathe. You feel him draw circles on your thighs to soothe you. It works for a second or two, until the feeling of Zayne pushing more of his length in, filling you up completely makes your head spin once more. You're fighting to keep your line of sight clear, but it's tough when your boyfriend is fucking balls deep in your pussy. 

“You're so warm and tight”, he groans, his olive eyes slowly letting go of the last strings of sanity he has left. “It feels so good.” 

Zayne can't get enough–even when you're sprawled beneath him, legs spread open, hair a shriveled mess, lipstick smudged at the corner, and eyes that leak so much lust–you look like a goddess in his eyes, pinned underneath him.

“Zayne”, you whine. He makes him grow thicker in you when he hears you like that for him. “Wait a moment, you're too big–” 

Zayne scrunches his eyebrows when he feels you squeeze him. Fuck, you're really driving him insane. 

He pulls out slightly, his breath hitched at the back of his throat when your creamy load leaks out and pools at the base of his dick. 

Zayne pushes himself in once more, the sounds of you whining like music to him. He thrusts into you over and over again, savouring and eating the moans that leave your lips. 

He pulls back, the greedy slowly clouding his vision when he realises this isn't enough.

Zayne effortlessly shifts you onto his lap, not minding that his cock naturally slipped out for now. His palm is on the back of your head and he’s pulling you in for another round of wet and desperate kisses. Every sigh you pull out from him makes your pussy clench the air uselessly.

Suddenly, the air doesn't feel as cold anymore.

Zayne looks at you with such overflowing desire that it makes him feel dizzy too.

Soft lips latch onto your skin, burning you with pleasure and tease. 

It feels hot and heavenly.

You sigh, fidgeting and tugging his ears playfully. 

“It's…gotten warmer”, you point out, feeling the warmth radiating off the both of you–the small beads of perspiration rolling down your neck to your chest.

“Even better”, Zayne replies, cupping your tits, wetting your nipple with rolls of his tongue, sucking your soft nubs. His eyes lock onto you to lap up your reactions. You're falling apart in the best ways possible. 

He can't get enough of the way your pussy is staining his trousers, rubbing, teasing his thick cock to just enter you again. 

You call out his name over and over, mixed with weak moans and your body trembling with every light tug he does on your nipple. 

When he finally gives you mercy and stops, you watch his smile play on his lips. 

You pout, sliding your thumb across his lips, and watching with shaky breaths when he takes your thumb past his lips, and equally wets it with his tongue.

You dive in, starved to claim his lips as yours once more, sharing the warmth that continues to climb within the confines of the car.

Zayne positions his cock once more, lining it up to your wet pussy hole, and pushes himself in again, drawing gasps and moans when he's filled you to the brim once more. He feels thicker this time.

“So good”, you sigh, your knees shaking from your pussy stretching once more. 

His hand sprawls over your ass, guiding it up and down as he thrusts you from below, still careful that you don't hit the roof of the car.

He shifts himself slightly forward, and you follow suit, letting him hit deeper parts in you more safely. You have your arms wrapped around him, realising it's completely pointless to try to ground yourself with Zayne fucking you stupid like that. 

More wet and lewd sounds start filling the car. You hear his voice right at your ear.

“I love it so much when your tight pussy makes such pretty sounds for me.” 

He pins your thighs down, forcing you to take every thrust he gives you. It gives him access to hit your sensitive spongy spot. It makes your toes curl and your eyes roll back. You bite your lip, the muscles in your thighs tensing. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! It feels so fucking good. 

Zayne knows he's hit the sweet spot when you tighten all over him, both in your arms and pussy.

“Let go all over me, y/n”, Zayne’s voice tickles your ears. “You're gonna feel so good.”

The repetition of Zayne perfectly hitting your spot makes you sob. The knot in your stomach snaps, and your thighs shake, your orgasm washing over you in waves, your vision going white. 

You're in fucking heaven.

“So good. I'm cumming so much, Zayne”, you sob. Zayne isn't letting your orgasm go just yet.

He leaves another mark on your shoulder, taking in a deep inhale of the perfume that's struggling to stay on your skin.

“I'm gonna make a whole mess in you, darling.” 

For a man as calm and collected as Zayne, the way he fucks you is nasty and disrespectful.

And you love every fucking bit of it.

He peppers kisses all over your neck and shoulders, turning them into bites when you feel his cock pulse, then warm and thick cum fills your whole pussy up.

“That's it. Take all of it. That's my good girl.”

While you catch your breath, you notice the fog on the car windows. You're not sure if the rain stopped or not. All you're sure of is that your mind is slowly getting broken by Zayne–every bit of it belonging to him, and that every time he fucks you from below, it makes you shiver from the sheer pleasure.

You feel Zayne suck your neck once more and the pleasure sends shivers down your body.

“Don't get distracted, darling”, his gentle voice luring you back to him.

He fits his cum-covered cock right into you again–nothing more than a stronger indicator that he's not done yet. It elicits another choked moan out of you. His grip is harder on you now. 

“Say my name. Louder.”

Damn. The temperature really went up. 

[bangchansdirty-slut]

Hello!! I love your stories!

Could you place an request for Heeseung x male reader? Wherever it is a type of enemies to fuckers,, Heeseung would feel jealous at times to see the reader with someone, in general Heeseung would be very possessive in someone who """hates""" (⁠ ⁠´⁠◡⁠‿⁠ゝ⁠◡⁠`⁠)

Hate That I Want U

•───⋅⋆⁺‧₊☽⛦☾₊‧⁺⋆⋅───•

Paring: Enemies to Fuckers!Top!Heeseung x Member!Bttm!Male Reader

Genre: Smut

Requested

More: Masterlist

•───⋅⋆⁺‧₊☽⛦☾₊‧⁺⋆⋅───•

"You're always hogging the spotlight," Heeseung grumbled, watching M/n charm their way through yet another interview. The young idol's laughter was infectious, and the interviewer's eyes sparkled with admiration. It was a dance Heeseung knew all too well—M/n's natural magnetism captivating everyone in the room.

M/n looked up, catching Heeseung's gaze. Their eyes met for a brief second before M/n's smile grew wider, as if challenging him to say it to his face. Heeseung clenched his fists, the heat rising to his cheeks. He couldn't deny the irritation he felt, but he also couldn't ignore the strange thrill that pulsed through him whenever they were at odds. It was like M/n knew exactly how to push his buttons—and enjoyed doing it.

After the interview wrapped up, Heeseung found himself unable to resist the urge to confront M/n. "What do you think you're playing at?" he hissed as the other members dispersed. "Stealing the show like that?"

M/n raised an eyebrow, leaning back in his chair with a casual air. "Just doing my job, sunbae." The way he said it, all sugary sweet with a hint of sass, only made Heeseung's blood boil more. "If you've got a problem with it, maybe you should work on your own charm."

Heeseung's jaw tightened. "Don't patronize me," he snapped. "I don't need to steal attention. I earn it."

M/n's eyes narrowed, the playfulness in them replaced with a hint of steel. "Oh, I see. So you think you're above me?"

Heeseung stepped closer, his voice low and dangerous. "You're the one acting like you're on top of the world. And let me tell you, that's not where you belong."

M/n's smirk grew. "Is that so? Then maybe you should come down from your high horse and show me what you're really made of." The challenge in his voice was unmistakable.

Heeseung felt the tension coil in his stomach, an unfamiliar mix of anger and something else—desire. He didn't know what had come over him, but he couldn't ignore the way M/n's words made his pulse race. "Fine," he bit out. "If that's what you want, I'll show you."

Jungwon, the group's leader, stepped between them, a hand on each of their shoulders. "Guys, come on," he said, his voice a calm reprimand. "This isn't the time or the place."

Heeseung took a step back, his eyes never leaving M/n's. "We're not done," he said through gritted teeth.

M/n simply shrugged, a smug smile playing on his lips. "Looking forward to it," he replied, his voice dripping with the promise of a fight.

The next day, backstage at a music show, the tension between Heeseung and M/n was palpable. They'd barely spoken since their heated exchange, the air thick with the electricity of unspoken words. As the members of ENHYPEN and TXT mingled, Heeseung couldn't help but steal glances at M/n, his frustration simmering below the surface.

The moment came when they were called to rehearse, one last time, their collaborative stage units : (M/n & Yeonjun) (Heeseung, Taehyun & Sunghoon) (Jake, Beomgyu & Jay) (Soobin & Niki) (Huening Kai, Sunoo & Jungwon). As Heeseung watched M/n and Yeonjun run through their routine, something snapped. The way M/n's body moved so effortlessly, the way Yeonjun's eyes followed him, it was too much. Jealousy and desire collided within him like a volatile storm, the pressure building until he could no longer contain it.

It was the last performance left, M/n and Yeonjun's unit. Heeseung watched from the side as M/n and Yeonjun's chemistry sizzled on stage. The way M/n's hips rolled, the way Yeonjun's eyes devoured him, it was a performance that had the audience screaming and the fan cams flashing. Heeseung felt his hands clench into fists, his nails digging into his palms. He couldn't stand the sight of it—how easily M/n stole the spotlight, how naturally he flirted with the very air around him.

As the performance drew to a close and the cheers grew deafening, Heeseung's jealousy boiled over. He waited for the crowd to die down, for the other members to congratulate M/n, and for the stage to clear. And then, as the lights dimmed and the cameras switched off, Heeseung made his move.

He stormed into M/n's private dressing room, slamming the door behind him. "What the hell was that?" he demanded, his voice a low growl.

M/n looked up from where he was toweling off his sweat-drenched hair, surprise flickering in his eyes before they darkened with something Heeseung hadn't seen before—desire. "Just giving the fans what they want," M/n replied, his voice low and sultry."Isn't that what we're all here for Hyung?"

Heeseung's breath hitched at the blatant provocation, the way M/n's eyes roamed over his body as if he were the one on stage. The room felt smaller, the air thick with the scent of their combined sweat and the lingering tension that had been building between them for weeks.

"You think you're so fucking hot, don't you?" Heeseung spat out, unable to mask the tremor in his voice. "Strutting around like you own the place."

M/n's smile was knowing, a silent dare. "Do I?" He stood up, closing the space between them. His eyes never left Heeseung's, the challenge in them unmistakable.

Heeseung's chest tightened, his heart hammering against his ribs. He was acutely aware of M/n's proximity, the heat of his body, the scent of his cologne—sharp and spicy—invading his personal space. "You know you do," he said, his voice hoarse. "It's all everyone talks about."

M/n reached out and placed a hand on Heeseung's chest, his touch feather-light, yet it sent a jolt of electricity through Heeseung's body. "Is that why you're so upset?" he murmured, his voice a purr. "Because everyone's looking at me?"

Their eyes locked, and for a moment, Heeseung felt like he could drown in the depths of M/n's gaze. He could see the mischief dancing in them, the way they seemed to say, 'I know exactly what you're feeling, and I'm enjoying every second of it.' He wanted to shove M/n away, to wipe that smug look off his face, so he turned M/n around and bent him against the table, pressing their bodies together.

M/n gasped, Heeseung's breath hot against his neck. "Is this what you want?" Heeseung taunted, his voice thick with lust. "To be punished for being such a brat?"

M/n's heart raced, his breathing shallow. He didn't resist as Heeseung's hands roamed his body, tracing the lines of his abs through his damp shirt. "Hyung!" he protested weakly, but his voice was laced with excitement.

Heeseung leaned in closer, his teeth grazing M/n's ear. "You drive me crazy," he murmured, his breath hot and tickling. "I hate it, but I can't get enough of you."

M/n's body responded before he could even form a coherent thought, his breath hitching as Heeseung's hands continued to explore. He felt the firm pressure of Heeseung's dick against his back, and the realization hit him like a ton of bricks—his sunbae wanted him, and not just in the way of a rivalry. It was raw, animalistic attraction.

"Then why don't you do something about it?" M/n shot back, his voice a challenge. He knew he was playing with fire, but the thrill was too intense to ignore.

Heeseung's grip tightened on M/n's hips, his mind racing. He knew he should stop, that this was a line they couldn't uncross, but the desire that had been festering within him was too strong. "You want me to fuck you until you can't even remember your own lines?" he growled, the words leaving his mouth before he could think better of it.

M/n's eyes widened, but instead of pushing him away, he leaned back, his body arching into Heeseung's touch. "I bet your lame excuse for a dick couldn't even make me cum," he retorted, the challenge in his voice unmistakable.

Heeseung's grip tightened, the dare in M/n's words making him harder than he'd ever been. "We'll see about that," he whispered, his hands moving to unbuckle M/n's pants. The younger idol's breath caught as Heeseung's fingers brushed against the growing bulge in his underwear.

M/n's eyes fluttered shut, his body betraying his words as Heeseung pulled his cock free, stroking it roughly. He couldn't believe this was happening—his rival, his sunbae, the one person he'd been trying to ignore for so long, was touching him like this. But it felt so good, so right, that he couldn't bring himself to stop it.

Heeseung's touch was surprisingly gentle despite the harshness of his words. He stroked M/n with a practiced ease that had the younger idol biting his lip to stifle a moan. The friction was exquisite, sending waves of pleasure crashing through him. He could feel the tension in Heeseung's body, the tremble in his hand, and it only served to make him more turned on.

"You like that?" Heeseung murmured, his breath hot against M/n's neck. "You like it when I touch you like this?"

M/n's only response was a whimper of pleasure, his body trembling in Heeseung's grasp. He knew he should push him away, but the sensation was too much to resist. The room was a cocoon of desire, the tension of their rivalry giving way to something more primal.

Heeseung's hand moved faster, his thumb circling the sensitive head of M/n's cock. The younger idol leaned back into him, his body begging for more, even as his mind screamed for him to regain control. "You're so fucking beautiful," Heeseung breathed into M/n's ear, the words sending a shiver down his spine.

M/n's eyes snapped open, his gaze meeting Heeseung's in the mirror. The raw hunger in his sunbae's eyes was unmistakable, and it sent a thrill through him that was equal parts terror and excitement. "I-I'm not," he stuttered, his voice a breathless whisper.

Heeseung smirked, his strokes growing more insistent. "Lying won't do you any good here," he said, his voice thick with lust. "I know exactly how much you want this."

M/n couldn't deny the truth in Heeseung's words. His cock was hard and leaking precum, his body eagerly responding to the older idol's touch. But he didn't want to admit it, not like this. He turned to face Heeseung, his eyes flashing with defiance. "Prove it," he dared, pushing back against the hand that held him.

Heeseung's smirk grew, his eyes dark with desire. He leaned in, his teeth catching M/n's earlobe in a gentle nip. "With pleasure," he murmured, his hand going to his cock, stroking it to full hardness. He pushed M/n's pants down further, exposing his firm ass to the cool air. M/n's breath hitched, his cheeks flushing at the blatant display of dominance.

M/n felt a strange mix of fear and excitement as Heeseung's hand moved from his cock to his ass, spreading his cheeks apart. He had never been taken like this before, but something about the way Heeseung was claiming him—like he owned every inch of his body—was intoxicating. He could feel the older idol's dick pressing against him, hot and demanding, and his own cock twitched in response.

Heeseung's hand slipped lower, teasing M/n's hole with a slick digit. "So tight," he murmured, his voice filled with a possessive need that made M/n's toes curl. "I bet you're going to feel so good around me."

M/n's eyes squeezed shut as Heeseung's finger breached him, the sensation a mix of pain and pleasure that had his knees buckling slightly. He bit his lip to keep from crying out, his body already begging for more. He could feel the head of Heeseung's cock nudging against his entrance, the blunt pressure making him shiver.

"Ready?" Heeseung's voice was a low, seductive growl, the question more of a demand than anything else.

M/n nodded, his breath shallow, his eyes never leaving Heeseung's in the mirror. He felt the pressure increase as Heeseung's cock began to push inside him, the stretching sensation both agonizing and exhilarating. He couldn't believe he was letting this happen, but the desire to feel Heeseung's dominance over him was too much to resist.

With one swift motion, Heeseung pushed all the way in, making M/n gasp. The older idol's grip on his hips tightened, his teeth sinking into M/n's shoulder as he held still for a moment, giving him time to adjust. The pain was intense, but it was quickly overtaken by the feeling of fullness, of being claimed by someone who had always been just out of reach.

M/n's nails dug into the dressing table, his breaths coming in short, sharp pants. He could feel every inch of Heeseung, the thickness of him filling him completely. "F-uck," he murmured, the word a plea and a curse all at once.

Heeseung pulled back slowly, watching M/n's face in the mirror, savoring the look of ecstasy and pain. "That's it," he coaxed, his voice a dark whisper. "Take it all."

M/n's eyes watered as Heeseung began to move, his hips snapping in a rhythm that was punishing and precise. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure and pain crashing through him, making his legs shake. He could feel the tension in Heeseung's body, the way his abs tensed with each movement, and it only served to spur him on.

Heeseung's strokes grew deeper, more demanding, his hand reaching around to grip M/n's cock in time with his thrusts. The younger idol couldn't help but moan, his body moving in sync with Heeseung's, his own hand reaching back to grip the older idol's hip, urging him faster.

Their eyes remained locked in the mirror, the reflection a warping blur of desire and anger. Each thrust was a declaration of power, a silent admission of the attraction that had been simmering beneath the surface for so long. The room was filled with the sound of skin slapping against skin, their harsh breaths, and the occasional moan that slipped past their clenched teeth.

M/n's body began to move of its own accord, pushing back against Heeseung's invasive cock, begging for more despite the burn. His own hand wrapped around his dick, stroking in time with Heeseung's punishing rhythm. He could feel his orgasm building, the pressure in his balls tightening with every stroke.

Heeseung's grip on M/n's hips grew bruising as he slammed into him, his eyes never leaving their reflection. "You're going to cum for me," he ordered, his voice gruff and demanding. "You're going to show everyone who you really belong to."

M/n's eyes rolled back in his head, the sensations overwhelming him. He didn't know if he could handle much more, but the thought of denying Heeseung anything was unbearable. His body was a live wire, every nerve ending alight with pleasure. "Hyung," he gasped, his voice trembling. "Please…"

Heeseung leaned in closer, his breath hot against M/n's neck. "What do you want?" he taunted, his voice low and velvety. "You want me to fill you up until you can't take it anymore?"

M/n's eyes snapped open, the fire in his gaze matching the heat between their bodies. "Yes!" he hissed, the word a desperate plea. "I want to feel you everywhere."

Heeseung's pace grew frenzied, his hand moving in tandem with his hips, stroking M/n's cock mercilessly. "You're going to scream my name," he murmured, his voice a seductive promise. "You're going to remember this every time you perform with him."

M/n's eyes widened at the mention of Yeonjun, but the anger it brought only served to fuel his arousal. He threw his head back, his mouth opening in a silent scream as he came, his hot cum spurting over the dressing table, mixing with the sweat that coated their bodies. Heeseung watched the display with a smug smile, his own climax not far behind.

Their bodies remained entwined, both trying to catch their breath, the silence in the room deafening. Heeseung's hand remained wrapped around M/n's still-hard cock, his own dick buried deep inside the younger idol. They were both panting, sweat glistening on their skin, the scent of sex thick in the air.

M/n's mind was a whirlwind of emotions—shock, pleasure, and a strange sense of satisfaction. He had never allowed himself to be so vulnerable before, especially not with someone he had such a tumultuous relationship with. But as Heeseung slowly withdrew, leaving him feeling empty, he realized he didn't regret a single moment of it.

The silence stretched between them, heavy with the aftermath of their encounter. Heeseung took a step back, his eyes still locked on M/n's in the mirror, his chest heaving. The desire in his gaze had transformed into something else—a mix of possessiveness and uncertainty.

M/n's breathing evened out, his body still trembling from the force of his orgasm. He straightened up, pulling his pants up with shaky hands. He could feel the wetness on his thighs, a testament to their explosive encounter. He turned to face Heeseung, his expression unreadable. "What now?" he asked, his voice a low murmur.

Heeseung looked at him, his own eyes dark and unreadable. He didn't know what to say—the raw emotion coursing through him was a tangle of anger, lust, and something else he couldn't quite put his finger on. "Now," he said, his voice gruff, "we clean up and pretend like this never happened."

M/n nodded, his cheeks flushed with both pleasure and embarrassment. He knew Heeseung was right—what had happened between them was explosive, and it couldn't be undone. They had to keep it a secret, for the sake of their group, their careers, and their "friendship".

The two of them cleaned up in tense silence, the reality of what they had just done weighing heavily on their shoulders. As Heeseung zipped up his pants, he couldn't help but feel a twinge of regret—not for the act itself, but for the mess they had created. Their rivalry had always been a dance of fire and ice, but this was something else entirely.

M/n stared at his reflection in the mirror, his eyes glazed over with a mix of disbelief and desire. He had never allowed anyone to touch him like that, to claim him so completely. He knew he should be furious, but all he felt was a strange sense of… completeness.

Heeseung turned away first, avoiding M/n's gaze as he grabbed his shirt from the chair. He knew that if he looked into those eyes again, he'd be lost. He couldn't explain the possessive need that had overtaken him, or the way his heart was racing in his chest. This wasn't supposed to happen—not with M/n, not like this.

M/n watched Heeseung leave, his own heart racing. He felt a strange mix of emotions. He was hurt by Heeseung's coldness, but also intrigued by the intensity of their encounter. He knew that Heeseung wasn't one to back down from a challenge, and in a twisted way, this was his way of claiming victory.

[madamechrissy]

Silent Serenades

♔ An arranged Marriage with Duke Gojo ♔

♔ Pairings: Duke Satoru Gojo x Duchess Reader

♔ Content/Warnings: TW: Past Self harm references, past eating disorder references- angsty asf always, Explicit sexual content, cunnilingus, fingering, dirty talk, name calling, hate/love sex!? lots of tension, and ofc a breed kink bc it's ME lol

♔ Word count: this chap: 13k (longest chap so far!)

♔ Summary: you are the diamond of the season, he is the charming Duke, it’s the marriage of the decade. Prominent families joining, and it so happens that Duke Gojo is gorgeous. But, he doesn't want you at all, leaving you a crying mess on your wedding night, alone. Now you're trapped in a loveless arranged marriage that destroys you from within. Royal AU, Cruel Duke Gojo x reader. OOC Set in 1800s England. Gojo is awful in this. You'll hate Satoru, warning you now. HEAVY angst Basically- Gojo is a royal dick and doesn't wanna marry you

Split POV- Duchess and Duke Gojo- Comments and Reblogs appreciated <3

Part Ten ♔ Masterlist ♔ Playlist

Part Eleven

Gojo’s POV

The last ball you had been to with Duke Gojo was completely different from this one, even only being a couple weeks ago. The last one you were enemies, you had been with Nanami and he had been with Lady Elaine. He had danced once with you, just for show, and had later watched you on that man’s lap, hating the man so much he almost lost all composure.

He had begged to just taste you that night, he wonders why you even let him, you know how horrible he was, but even then, something pulled you both to each other, like never ending magnets. Even then he’d tried so hard to fight it, the desire for you, the feelings building, this inexplicable need to constantly be near you, to your very detriment.

Now, Duke Gojo is walking into this ballroom with your little hand in his, you all certainly aren’t enemies now, fuck Satoru is falling in love deeper with your every breath in fact. He knows you’re terrified, so he does not want to push to know your feelings but he knows they are there, how else could you even care for a man like him, a man who has wronged you so many times.

This morning he had watched you sleep, when he’d woken up cradling your delicate body in his strong arms. You looked so real, not just this figurative angel he came to check on at night, your hair was messy, you were snoring just slightly, he had smiled at how precious you were. When the sun’s rays had hit the windows of your bedchamber, you’d blinked up and looked at him.

His heart had faltered. He was terrified, would you be upset, scared to be next to him? Would you tell him to leave, realize your folly, your mistake of ever letting Satoru close, letting him fuck you, hold you. And fuck if you weren’t the most exquisite creature he’d seen in the morning, if you weren’t the best thing he’d ever felt, your body seemed made for him, you seemed made for him.

You had just smiled softly, caressing his face, and you’d given him a little kiss, before backing away shyly. Satoru had of course responded with a passionate kiss, already hard from being pressed against you all night. But you all had been interrupted for there was much to do before the ball, otherwise he would have devoured you, every bit of you.

The bliss of waking up with you made him realize that last night was not just some dream, in fact it was so much better than any dream. On the carriage ride instead of arguing or being silent, both of you had spoken of the village, you had learned more of each other, even though at times he saw you stop yourself from being so enthusiastic, controlled yourself, held yourself in a bit.

He sees it written all over your pretty face, you’re still terrified of opening your heart, and who could blame you? Satoru himself could not forgive his transgressions towards you, despite the fact that you seem to be willing to give him a chance. You squeeze his hand a bit, scanning the crowd as you all stand on the top of the winding steps, to descend into the ballroom.

“What is it, Princess? Nervous?” He murmurs, you take a breath, looking up at him under your lashes.

“A little. Is this the first event we’ll have where you don’t hate me?” You tease, he smirks then.

“Yes, but you still hate me.” He says the words lightly, but he hopes that they’re not true, against all sense. He hopes you feel more than hatred, though Satoru would take your hatred over anyone else’s love.

“A little.” You whisper, as he leans down now, putting your hand on his inner elbow now. “Much less than the last one.”

“I’ll take it as a win.” Satoru earns your little breathy laugh, fuck if everything you do doesn’t affect him in every way. “You look so stunning, everyone will be after you soon, you know.”

You blush now, looking down shyly as you both descend the staircase, your heels and his hessian boots clicking along the marble steps. You’re donned in a glittering white gown, so stunning it had taken his breath away when you’d first walked out of your room earlier. You were for once not wearing those ridiculous corsets your mother put you in your entire life, a bit out of fashion if anything.

Your waist was small enough, and he relishes in the fact you can breathe, and eat without being in such discomfort. Your dress has an empire waist, lacy roses along the bodice, cut to show much of your tantalizing breasts, not the older style fashion you usually had, though you looked beautiful in those as well. Satoru wants you to be your own person, not just your mother’s shadow.

He still does not know how deep what your mother has done to you goes, but he’s wary of seeing her after the dinner, where she’d been so hurtful, and where he’d realized what he’d caused, more pain for you. He never wants you to feel pain again, especially if he can help it, you’re owed at least that much for everything you have endured.

“Thank you, Satoru, you look dashing as well.” You murmur, leaning up to whisper in his ear as he bends down, Satoru smirks despite his heart racing at your compliment.

“Of course I do.” You roll your eyes now, giggling just a bit, a sound that has frequently been making his heart swell with so much affection it could burst. You’re turning him pathetic, he should be more scared of - Ending up like he did with Adelia- But he’s trying to stay open, to stop closing up, even if it destroys him in the end.

“I should not save you any dances, rakish man.” You tease, pretty lips quirking up just so as you do.

“Ah, cruel Duchess. You’ll dance with Suguru?” You roll your eyes.

“Maybe I shall.”

“Keep your lips to yourself.”

“I should say the same!” It’s too easy with you, the way you all ebb and flow, it feels far too good, and Satoru realizes it could have been this way from the beginning, even during your courtship, if he’d just opened up. The thoughts of time wasted and pain he’s brought consume him. “Satoru I was kidding.”

You snap him out of it then, looking at him with concern drawing your brows together. He gently touches the spot between them that is furrowed, as many onlookers start to speak of you both, hushed whispers and pointed fingers. The Duke and Duchess entered this elegant ballroom, where everyone was already mingling and dancing, of course it was a spectacle.

You stand out, of course you do, when haven’t you? You lit up everything even long, long before he would admit it. Of course Duke Gojo knows he does as well, but people truly adored you, for much more than your pretty exterior. Even now you are smiling at everyone who greets you all as you walk through the throngs of people, onto the chalk designed floor beneath you both.

“Shall I have your first dance?” Satoru murmurs to you softly, and you nod, biting your lower lip nervously. He gently releases it from your teeth’s grasp, seeing the little indentations, seeing your eyes dilate at his touch.

Fuck he’d love to be inside you again, feel you cumming on his cock. As elegant and ladylike as you present, he knows you’ve swallowed his cum and his spit last night, knows you had ridden his cock and cum all over the length of it. He knows you liked your ass smacked, liked your hair pulled, liked being choked, this elegant pretty Princess of his.

Even now he’s thinking of it, of sliding his cock between your perfect lips, of feeling your tongue dipping into the hole on his tip, greedily tasting his precum. Thinks of picking you up and fucking you on every single surface there is. Three times is not enough even in an evening for him with you, he’d love to fuck you from sunlight to sundown, dusk till fucking dawn.

He wants to fuck you until you’re both passing out from your exertions, but still push more and more in your soaking wet cunt. He wants to fill you with his seed so badly, he can’t of course but he dreams of it, of how good it would feel to cum inside you, fill you until you’re dripping out. Drink it right out of your yummy cunt, taste you two together.

He dreams of tying you up to the new bed he had ordered, they should have it together by the time the ball is over, he knows you’re disgusted by it, and why wouldn’t you be? He’d fucked countless women right in that room, with the goddamn door open, knowing you could see, wanting to make it so clear he ‘didn’t want you’ so you wouldn’t ever feel anything.

How, after all that, do you feel anything?

Satoru is desperate to do anything to make you stay, he would let you walk all over him if you wanted, but you’re just not like that. You’re damaged like him, yes, but you go about things differently, instead of being full of resentment, you push through and you try.

“Deep in thought, your Grace?” You ask softly, as the music begins, and people are crowded around you all.

He just nods a bit, taking your waist now, feeling the nip of it under your satin dress, watching your breath catch at the touch, your lips part just so. Your hand comes to grip his, as you both begin to move, his thumb pressing into your ribcage, his other fingers pressing into your back, watching you tremble, nearly having a misstep.

“Something wrong, Duchess?” He smirks as he asks you, you glare now, earning his chuckle.

“Nothing!” His thumb brushes the side of your breast as you both turn and twirl, the eyes of the ton on you.

“Sure it’s not. Not wet from my touch?” He whispers, so close he can taste your sweet breath, you scowl, narrowing your glittering eyes, your other hand clutching his shoulder over his suit jacket.

“Not at all, conceited man.” He just grins at you, spinning you and then dipping you over his arm, contemplating kissing you so that everyone knows how much he desires you, especially so many women Satoru has had a past with. He senses Lady Elaine glaring as he stands you back up. “What’s wrong, Satoru?”

“My first name, scandalous.” You shake your head at him with a little smile, until your eyes find her. “Ignore her. She’s angry I kicked her out that night.”

Your hands clutch tightly to his shoulders as his are on your waist, and you both glide together, effortlessly. “She’s glaring daggers at me.”

“Jealousy.”

“I doubt-”

“It is, because you have me.” He gulps then, sighing. “If you want to, of course… I know you…”

You caress his cheek then, mid movement, he leans into the touch with a sigh. “I want to try.” You say softly, and he sees how nervous you are, he can feel your pulse race as his thumbs brush the delicate veins of your inner wrist. “I’m terrified of how I feel, how easy it was this morning.” Your voice is a whisper.

“I know, I know… I have a surprise for you later.” You light up then, so pretty. “Do you like surprises?”

“I have not had very many, but yes I do. I think?” You’re so beautiful with that blush creeping up your neck.

“You think it’s a tawdry surprise, slutty girl.” He murmurs, earning you stomping on his foot, he huffs, glaring back at you.

“Oops, so clumsy.” You stick your tongue out through your teeth, Satoru snorts then, shaking his head.

“I’ll punish you later.” He says against the shell of your ear, as the song ends and he’s bent low, hand cupping your face.

“Oh will you? You can try.” He feels his body react as he dares to kiss your lips, in front of the entire ton, in front of onlookers and servants alike. He could devour you here, but he keeps it chaste, looking at the desire in your eyes when he backs away. “In front of them all?”

“They should know you’re mine.”

“Yours?”

“Even if you don’t know it yet.” He kisses your lips once more, earning the awws of many, and the look of ire from others, before leaning back and smirking at you. “You blush every-”

“I’ll stomp your other foot, Duke.” You shove him off you then, huffing so cutely, fuck the world melts when you are here, it’s like nothing else exists. Soon, Suguru and Shoko come up to you both, clear shock on their faces as they observe you all, and you straighten up, shyly smiling at them both.

“Did he drug you? Why are you so happy with this ass?” Shoko demands, and Satoru sticks his tongue out, earning your little giggle.

“You let her speak to me this way?” Satoru asks you.

“Oh, I love when she does.”

Suguru and Shoko chuckle, Satoru glares at all three of you. “You little brat, the most insolent-”

“Satoru…” Suguru starts, and Satoru sighs.

“It’s just foreplay, she’s quite… freaky.” Suguru blushes now, looking up at the chandeliers above you all, and you gasp, smacking at his shoulder, luckily no one really noticed as another dance has started.

“Oh! Oh? Oohhh…” Shoko puts it together now, looking at both of you. “Shit, really, him?”

“Shoko, you’re such a bitch.” She stomps on Satoru’s other foot now. “Surrounded by psychotic wenches.”

“What changed suddenly?” Suguru interjects, looking right at you as he speaks, a hand gentle on your arm, so caring. He makes Satoru want to punch him, though he knows he just cares for you, he detests anyone else touching you, even his best friend, a thing that surprises him.

With Adalia she had literally been with countless men, he did not want to know details, all he knew was his obsession with her. He cared little for what she did not around him, whereas the times you had gone to your baker, it had broken him, left him in fucking shambles. Once he sat there at the table for hours and hours, praying you would turn around, think better of it.

But why would you have? Satoru consistently pushed you, and he now understands completely why you did so. Though he wishes so fervently he could have had that special moment of being your first, he knows the man he was then did not deserve it. It did not change the fact that he wanted to kill the man who did it, that he wants you to completely forget him.

He wants to be your only, your last.

You’re surely his.

“I’m giving it some time…”

“A month.”

“No, Satoru… perhaps longer. I do not know yet.” His chest feels so light, like he can finally breathe again. “Time to help him with the villages, and… get to know each other finally. Exclusively.”

“That’s… that’s good news. Surprising news.” Suguru looks at Satoru now curiously, dark eyes narrowing, assessing him up and down. “Is Satoru back, is the shitty whore Duke gone?”

Satoru snorts, rolling his eyes, Shoko crosses her slender arms as she studies him as well. “I’d also like to know. You better treat her right, actually more than that, you should be kissing her feet.” She says.

“Kissing the ground she walks on.” Suguru says, and you’re grinning now, raising a brow expectantly at him.

“I’m frequently on my knees, if that helps.” Satoru says, for it is true, how many times had he sank to his knees for you, to beg for you, god only you could make him this way, and it still terrifies him. It’s a million times more intense than Adalia, it’s as if you’ve wiped her memories out, like that love was nothing.

But what if you still leave!?

Satoru does not know if he can live if you do, if he could live with himself knowing all the pain he caused and not have a chance to fix it, to make you feel loved, wanted, cherished. Those vows he never took seriously, now they’re like little biting wounds, of every single one he broke, has he even now made you feel cherished or loved, or simply… desired?

He wants to show you more, but he also knows it’s overwhelming, fuck he is overwhelming altogether, so he wants to give it time, but he is also consumed by you. Ever since he had you, since he felt you under him, felt your sweetness dripping down his cock, entwined his fingers with your own, he is more hopeless than before, so mad you make him just by existing.

You’re covering your mouth with your little gloved hand as they continue picking on Satoru, lighting up your face, lighting up the room. How could he have sapped so much joy from you!? How can he get over the hatred he has for himself, so he can show you the love building, and it’s a crushing, consuming love, one where it’s all he can think of.

All he can think of is you.

How many ways he can make you cum, how many times he could get you to scream out his name. How your beautiful fucking eyes glazed over when he got you off so hard you were convulsing, then that look when you’d been on your knees. But more than just that, more than your perfect cunt and body, no the moments where he just could hold you…

He’d never slept so well in his fucking life as last night, woken up just drooling on you, sprawled all over, taking over your bed, you’d just been snug and tight against him, so small and sweet. Satoru wanted to protect you from anything in the world, but what had he done, but been what you needed protecting from. Even Suguru had screamed at him, Shoko had, his mom had just from hearing rumors.

And you needed another man to protect you from him. Satoru hates that, more than anything, the thoughts that swirl as he realizes how much he pushed you, how much he took out every pain in his life on you. He does not think he even deserves to look upon you, but he’s so fucking selfish he’ll take it, take anything from you.

“I am starving.” You say, and he smiles at hearing it, it’s not something you would normally say, so worried constantly about appearances. “I am going to grab a bite to eat, let them yell at you more.”

He chuckles, kissing your hand gently, to the surprise of Suguru and Shoko, who share a little hopeful smile. “Sounds good, I’ll be waiting for another dance.”

“Hmm, maybe… we’ll see.” You tease, and Satoru is left with Shoko and Suguru, crossing their arms.

“She was completely done with you I thought.” Shoko says, Satoru sighs, the knife twisting in his stomach.

“I truly thought so as well. She had…”

“The papers, I am aware.” He glares at them, but then sighs once more, shaking his head. “I understand why you signed them. You all wanted better for her.”

They both look aghast now. “Have you actually come to your senses? Did all my smacks work?” Shoko asks, Satoru shakes his head once more, as a server brings them each a glass of champagne. He twists it in his hands now.

“She found someone else.” His voice is hoarse as he speaks, and they share a look, then nod a bit. “You knew?”

“Yes. I did not judge her for it. Though she should have picked me.” Suguru says with a smirk, and Shoko laughs.

“You’ve already kissed her, you ass.” Satoru glares, but Suguru shrugs, sipping on his champagne casually.

“Sure did. You deserved worse.”

“I know. But still you deserve a punch.”

“You deserve multiple.”

“I’d have kissed her if I was there.” Shoko says with a grin, earning another scowl from Satoru.

“Some friends I have!”

“You’re lucky you still have any. Even before her, you’ve been miserable.” Suguru says.

“I know. How about you both come to dinner this weekend? And I can explain myself.” They nod then, making Satoru exhale in relief. “It’s a long story…”

“Hey, is the Duchess alright? Her mother…” Suguru trails off now, and Satoru looks over at you, his stomach lurching when he looks at your mother grabbing your wrist roughly, shoving down whatever food you had in it. “What on Earth is she doing acting that way!?”

“What a little bitch. Should I spill a drink on her?” Shoko says through gritted teeth, her fists clenching in her silk gloves.

“She’s done this to her for her entire life.” Satoru whispers, furious as he watches your crestfallen face. “And I’m done with it.”

Satoru downs his drink in a gulp, handing the empty glass to Suguru now, before grabbing his and downing it as well. Suguru just nods to him, looking back at you now, concern washing his face. “I’ve always wondered if she had a problem, she never ate anything around me. Then you…”

“I know, I was horrible. I must fix at least one thing I can control.” Satoru says, and they nod.

“Go to her.” Suguru pats him on the shoulder, and now Satoru’s eyes are set on you across the room, striding towards you in long lengths, ignoring anyone and everyone who tries to pause him, speak to him.

He can see your mother bending over you, and you damn near fucking cowering, fiddling with your hands in front of yourself, before covering yourself up with your arms, hugging yourself, so insecure. It makes him sick and furious, sick for you, for what you feel when you shouldn’t, and furious this woman would continue on. He can’t even hear her words but he just knows.

He knows he needs to do one fucking thing right for you, one of many more things if you’ll allow him. He stands now right in front of you both, you’re standing in front of a tower of fruit and chocolate fountains, there’s the tiniest little plate where you had taken a bite of one. You look up at him now, eyes glistening with tears, and your mother attempts a fake smile.

“Your Grace!”

“Just what have you said to upset my wife?”

Your POV

His wife?

Why does hearing that make your heart race, make you overheat, to the point you almost feel giddy? It feels so good to hear him, to see him standing so tall next to you, putting a possessive arm around your waist, bringing you against him. Just days ago this would seem impossible, improbable, but now…

Your mother is sputtering, and you’re trying not to cry in front of an entire assembly of people, mostly gossipers, you’re trying to hold onto a frail composure, but it’s nearly impossible. The relief you feel when he’s next to you is indescribable, no matter what has happened between you two, once again he defends you from her, the woman you have no hope of standing up to.

You had just wanted a nibble as you had not had a chance to eat today with all the preparations, when your mother had smacked it right out of your hand, cruelly assessing your outfit. Asking why you had no corset, asking what you were wearing, telling you how horrible and wide waisted you look. That you were embarrassing her by being this way.

You cannot manage to stand up for yourself with her, you never really have been able to, unlike how you could with Duke Gojo. You’re now rubbing on the scar on your wrist, and Satoru’s eyes go there, you still have much to learn about each other, and you’re at times scared to open up. He’s trying, and you want to try, but it’s so terrifying to trust him.

It felt so easy, waking up next to him, those glittering blue eyes studying you, that silky white hair perfect even in the damn morning. You had shared this look with him as the sun’s rays had filtered in through the window, casting shadows on his perfect face, tempting you to caress a cheek. He had kissed you so hungrily, in the quiet little morning, a kiss that felt like so much more than lust.

Satoru Gojo surely knew lust, look at all his experience, but he says with you it is more, and you’re scared to believe him. But you do want to, and fuck if you don’t feel deeply for him, falling into a madness that consumes you. The thing that has scared you this entire time is your feelings for him, now more than ever, you feel your heart in his hands.

And he could crush you if he knew that you were falling head over heels in love with this cruel, foolish, toxic and insane man. A man that you should not feel this for, even though yes he’s trying, why do you want to forgive him so fast? Why not have him suffer, make him feel pain like you did…

Well because that’s not who you are.

But at the same time you can’t just express it, times like this morning you wanted to whisper ‘my love’ but you cannot yet. You still need to feel safe, so you must keep it to yourself, you do not want things used against you. Of course you want to believe him, but you’re still nervous, and he seems to understand, he does not ask for you to return the things he says.

But you feel them, with your entire body and soul, just dancing with him in his arms, looking up at him in his elegant black suit, you wanted to melt into him then and there, as if it were only you two. The rest of the world seems to fade in the background, even before, even when you hated each other, it was like it was just you two and that hatred.

Was it ever hatred? You still do not know. Even then you wanted to figure him out, to solve him, even in Nanami’s bed you’d thought of him, you had dreamed of him so many times. You were always consumed by him, but now the hatred has ebbed and flowed, and you’re left with more and more feelings beyond desire, especially now as he’s studying you carefully.

You had cut yourself a few times, always in the same place, and unfortunately once was a very deep one, on accident. You had wanted to do it as a punishment, because you knew you could never live up to your mother’s expectations. But that day, you’d been happy, simply been baking muffins in the kitchens with the cooks, and had been nibbling when she’d found you.

You always had strict rules set by your mother, and even more as a young adult, as your mother put more and more pressure on you. You had to have the tiniest waist, they would corset you down to a ridiculous eighteen inches at certain points, but as you matured, you could only get to twenty inches, and to see you indulging had set your mother into a fit of course.

She had laced you up herself in the room, laced you so tightly and with so much force you threw up the only thing you had eaten, she did not hit you or hurt you, your parents never did such a thing, for that you guess you are lucky. But she had said the meanest things as she laced you up, of how no man would want you, of how you needed to be prettier, better, thinner.

You’d sobbed as she had left, just a tying of a corset became something so disgusting, and after you’d thrown up the contents of your stomach, barely able to breathe, you’d had an asthma attack. Finally getting to the kitchens, you’d instead found a knife, and sliced your wrist so deep blood had poured everywhere, and for a moment you felt a dizzying peace.

Your nan had stitched you up, sobbing, you had broken her heart, you knew, but she never judged you, she just unlaced you, caring for the blood not just on your wrist but on your back from your mother’s tight lacing. She had bandaged you up and held you as you sobbed all night, telling you that you were worthy.

Even thinking of it now makes you choke up, sniffling back tears as you struggle to focus, to not let such thoughts drag you down. “I merely am concerned at what she is wearing, your Grace. Where is her corset, and what is this dress!?”

“She can wear whatever she bloody well wants, first off Mama.” Satoru says, squeezing you tightly. “Second off, she looks beautiful, women do not wear corsets, not young women anyway. It’s not even in fashion. You would want my Duchess out of fashion?”

“No, of course not but it’s not flattering! She had the smallest waist, your Grace, before you met-”

“How much smaller does she need to fucking be!? How can she have children if she starves herself, she’s already done so enough I imagine in your care.” He scowls at her now, and she returns it.

“Well, I never! She had everything she wanted.” You scoff now, earning her ire. “Something to say?”

“No.” You whisper, hating yourself, and Satoru looks at you in confusion, thin white brows drawn together.

“That’s fine, I have much to say on her behalf, first and foremost you will no longer try to control what she eats, what she wears, anything. I am her husband now, and that duty is only for me. And I say she can do whatever the fuck she wants. Is this understood, my Lady?” His words in your defense touch you deeply, as you look up at him, seeing the set to his jaw, feeling his grip on you.

Your mother sighs, looking at you with disdain up and down. “You of course have that right, but I caution you to think better. She enjoys sweets too much, what if she becomes-”

“She can have whatever it is she wants. And she’s beautiful, so beautiful you feel the need to down her. Is it your inadequacies you push?” Your mouth drops open, your mother blushing furiously, fanning herself now as your dad comes up, smiling and patting your head. Though a little awkward and distant, he was kind, completely clueless surely.

“What’s going on with you three? People are looking.” He says, Satoru smirks just a bit at him.

“I was informing your wife it’s a husband’s duty to watch what his wife does, not her mother’s any longer. Would you agree my Lord?” Satoru asks, and your father glares at your mother now.

“Again?” He asks quietly, she rolls her eyes.

“I’m just looking out for her, I just care for her.”

“Perhaps your care has nearly ended me.” You finally murmur, earning Satoru and your father’s concerned gaze, your mother looks further irritated.

“So ungrateful, I-”

“That’s quite enough. You will no longer speak to her and upset her in that way, especially if you do not wish to lose all your invitations garnered by her being married to me. Is that quite clear?” Satoru’s icy blue eyes glare right at her, your dad senses the tension and tugs at her arm.

“She’s just feeling a little out of sorts. Apologize, darling.” Your dad says, your mom is seething, scowling down at you.

“Fine, let yourself go then. I suppose it’s your right, you’re married well, but I hope you set a better example for your-”

“That’s enough. An apology, then you may leave.” Satoru says again, she looks up at him, mouth setting.

“I apologize, your Grace.”

“No, to her, to your daughter.” You tense next to him now, shaking your head, and Satoru looks even more curiously at you.

“No need, Mama.” You murmur, now Satoru is glaring down at you.

“There is a need. I insist.” He speaks through gritted teeth. You take a breath, and your mother looks down for a moment, seeing you two.

“You’re indeed in love, aren’t you? You both are lucky.” You both pause at that. “You shall hear no more, it is your right as her husband to control such things. I bid you both a good evening.” Your dad pauses as your mom turns away.

“I hope you are doing well, darling. You look lovely.” You smile then, taking his hand, as he nods his head to Satoru. “Your Grace.”

“My Lord.” He says in return, then, he looks down at you, and you can’t control it anymore, you feel yourself falling apart, at how much you just…

How much you feel.

He stood up for you again from her, someone you can’t manage to stand up for yourself, the emotions are now overwhelming, the things you constantly want to hold back, the fears you should have and do have shoved back for just this moment. You take his hands in yours, as he looks down at you, concern written on his face, delicately wiping a tear.

“Come, too many onlookers, let us have privacy for a moment.” You nod then, letting him walk you out of the room, your tears catch the lights of the chandeliers above your heads, glinting in the evening. He leads you through a sea of lords and ladies, through an empty corridor, until he has you in a large study, shutting the door behind you.

It’s quiet for a moment, as he clicks the lock, then you can’t hold it in any longer, your tears, your feelings, as soon as he has turned to face you, you’re against him, pulling him down by the lapels of his jacket, tip toeing. You smash your lips on his, and he devours yours, kissing you over and over, hands cupping your face, tasting the salt of your tears.

His hands soon come to grip your waist, burning through the layers of your gown, finally he leans back, blue eyes flickering back and forth as he studies you, wiping more of the tears that flow. He’s quiet for just a moment, exhaling and then kissing your cheeks, your forehead, and you cling to his wrists, trembling.

“Thank you, Satoru. You didn’t have to do that.” You whisper finally, looking up at him through your watery gaze.

“It’s the very least I can do. What has she done to make you so… weak in front of her? Where’s the angry brat I’m used to?” You giggle a bit then, but he seems very serious, taking off your gloves slowly, a thumb brushing your wrist. “I have no right to ask more about you, but if you would share?”

You nod then, he sits you on the settee, coming to sit next to you, an arm wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you against him. “I was never good enough for her, Satoru, never ‘perfect’ enough. So I began to punish myself for my imperfections…” He gulps, his own eyes filled with emotions.

“I always thought you were so perfect, that it vexed me. Until I got to truly know you, and realize you… are quite a mess.”

“Hey!” He chuckles, as you shove at him, sniffling now.

“Beautiful mess.” You take a breath now, leaning closer, letting him brush your arm up and down gently.

“You make it difficult to keep hating you. Odd for a man so hateable prior.” He smiles sadly, snowy lashes lowering over his irises.

“I surely was easy to hate. So… the perfection was hard to reach for you? Where does it leave the rest of us?”

“Oh hush. No it was impossible, and soon I well… cut myself.”

Satoru gulps now, eyes glimmering. “Fuck.”

“Is this too-”

“No, I want to know you. Please.” You nod then, hearing the desperation in his voice, feeling yourself want him more, in ways you never knew, in ways that scare the fuck out of you, telling him things no one knew but Nan, and even she did not know all of it.

“I did it to punish myself for my inadequacy.” You whisper, his eyes flutter shut for a moment, pulling you even closer. “I went too far one night, when she was particularly cruel to me, I had been eating muffins in the kitchen. That’s why the scar is there, I cut too deep, then for a moment… I thought perhaps things would be better if-”

“No, no, no. Never. Would anything be better without you here.” He cups your face now, squeezing so hard you wince, and you can’t stop the break down, as he kisses you once more, soft brushes of once cruel lips. “I said that day that I wanted you not to exist, and I’ll never fucking forgive myself for it now. What if you hurt yourself due to me!?”

“Satoru, I didn’t, and I forgive you.” His jaw clenches.

“You shouldn’t! You shouldn’t!” He’s shaking you now, choking up on his own words, chest heaving with his breaths. You shake your head, running your hands up his chest now.

“I do forgive you for it. I do. You have to forgive yourself.”

“No, I will not. I’ll hate myself for you.”

“Satoru, you’re trying. I see it. I see you.” You swipe the moisture from his cheek now, and Satoru exhales, leaning in closer, hands on your waist, pressing in, your back against the chaise now, his body hard against yours.

“How can you forgive me?”

“Because I… because I feel… I am…” You can’t say it, fuck you want to, the words choke in your throat, and Satoru notices, now you’re on your back, pressed into the firm cushion, and he’s braced on top of you, as both of your hearts pound in your chests.

“I will never let you be hurt again, even if it’s me, even if I have to remove my goddamn self from your life. I swear it to you. I will never. Not your bitch mother, not some lady I was foolish enough to lay with, no one. I will protect you as long as you stay with me.” Your eyes are so full of tears it’s difficult to see, they’re falling down hot and sticky, as he leans so close you can feel his body weight on you.

“I believe you.” You say softly, voice breaking. “I forgive you.”

“How!?”

“Because I see what’s underneath, I see who you are. Yes it still fucking hurts, yes I’m terrified, but I am… I am…”

“Scared to say it.” He murmurs, and you nod. “Then let me say it.”

“Satoru, no…”

“I’m falling deeper in love every second I breathe your air, air I do not think I even deserve to share. Every time you smile it stabs me in the goddamn heart, the broken, fucked up heart that beats just for you.”

“Don’t!” You try to stop it, to stop his words, words that will end you, but Satoru will not allow it.

“It’s the truth, it is. You do not have to say anything back, fuck I do not deserve it, do not deserve any of you. Just know it is true, that my greatest regret is making the woman I am falling in love with hurt. The one I want to make feel so fucking good every day now, the one that deserves the world, deserves more than I could ever give. But I will try, I will try everything I can-”

“Satoru.” You cut him off then, as his words wrack through you, as he’s saying things that seem surreal.

“I’m sorry, it’s too much, it’s just that you consume me, kill me-”

“Satoru.” He sighs.

“You mean to crush me between your little fingers, do it, it’s yours.” He puts your hand on his heart, you feel it pounding against your palm.

“You have to forgive yourself.”

“No. I love you too much not to hate me.” His words ruin you, the intent behind them, the intensity, words you feel too, but fuck you’re still so afraid

“Stop it. I don’t hate you, quite the opposite.” His lips part then, glossy and tempting. “I should hate you.”

“You should.”

“Just… kiss me.” He slams his lips down on yours now, taking everything you ever thought you knew and knocking it over, his lips feel so perfect as if they were always supposed to be there, like there was nothing before him, and there is nothing but him.

“I shouldn’t get to kiss you.” He says as he leans up, hand on one of your thighs, sliding up your stocking clad leg, making you tremble. “I shouldn’t get to touch you. To exist near you.”

“Well guess what, I want you to. I want you. Yes you were a fucking ass, and yes I’m terrified, but let me decide what I want.” Your voice breaks once more as he finds you, hot and eager, when weren’t you for him? He moans softly as he feels you, as your hips arch up.

“Nothing has ever felt like this.” He murmurs, sliding two fingers in your soppy little entrance, stretching you out and making you gasp, covering your mouth to hide a cry as he studies you. “No one has ever felt like this. All I am thinking of is how badly I want you to forget that anyone ever touched you, kissed you. I want it all to be me.”

“You’re insane, you know that? Mnh…” You’re arching up for more of his touch, in some Lord’s study, in the middle of a ball, but it’s what you want, you want him more than anything, your cunt greedily sucking him in, soaking his fingers.

“I want you to be mine, Duchess. All mine. Selfish and greedy, I know. But I crave it, I want it, I need it. Only mine.”

“Fuck you talk too much.” You whisper, earning his scowl, and you can’t help but giggle before he’s shoving his third finger in your pussy, making you gasp, just to the first knuckle.

“Too much? Can’t take it?” He whispers, challenging you now, and it’s your turn to glare up at him.

“Maybe I want y-you to… forget about anyone.”

He chuckles as you hear your squishing wetness, hand moving under your gown, working you so good you’re getting closer and closer. “I already have. All I can see is you, even when I close my damn eyes.” His lips hover as he shoves his fingers deeper, moaning. “Feel her pulsing around them.”

“Ngh…” You’re so close when suddenly the door knob jiggles, and you gasp, pulling away, but he gently eases his fingers out, sucking you off him, the sticky honeyed arousal, moaning. “You’re insane!”

“You enjoy it, slutty girl.” He whispers, kissing you once more, and you’re so close it hurts, throbbing now.

“I hurt, fuck.” You curse, Satoru chuckles, helping you up, smoothing out your dress now.

“Come now, let us put on our airs, and don’t wobble, they’ll know.”

“Oh fuck you!” You shove him and he snatches you up, picking you up in his arms, your feet dangling as you cling to him.

“I’ll punish this dirty mouth later.” His words excite you, goddammit, everything about him does. When you all are dancing another set later on, you are dancing with Suguru and him with Shoko, it’s almost impossible not to throw yourself at him, you try to remember how much you should hate him, and those things are always in the back of your head, but now…

Now things aren’t as they were before.

“You wound me, Duchess.” Suguru says with a pout, you look up at his handsome face and smile. “And you smile at my pain!?”

“Oh hush, you just wanted to comfort me that night.”

“I’ll let you both think that.” He shoots a wink at you, earning your blush. “How is the puppy Satoru?”

“So good! You’re coming over for dinner, yes?”

“Yes, I look forward to knowing what happened in just a few days' time. I can’t say I’m not happy though, to see him so… in love.”

“You think he truly is?”

“I know he is. But I knew that, which is why it was so baffling, to watch him go against everything he felt, and be so nasty. It’s hard for me to forget that dinner.”

“I know, Lord Geto.” You sigh, as the song ends, and he kisses your hand, his long silky hair falling over one shoulder.

“I want you both to be happy. You let me know if we need to beat him.” You laugh softly as you give him a curtsy.

“Indeed. I may need you to, you never know.” You look then, to see Lady Elaine as well as four other women all over Satoru, as he looks right at you, drinking a glass of whiskey. Suguru also looks.

“He needs your rescue, Duchess.” You roll your eyes.

“Does he?”

“He’s mouthing ‘help me’. So.” You head over now, and Satoru grins, and fuck if it doesn’t do things to you, to see him happy in these moments, to see him like this, you wonder how long you can hold it in, the joy in what Satoru said to you.

Falling in love with you.

You should question it, question him, but all you can think of is how he said it, and what you felt when he did. How deeply in your soul you feel his words, words that Nanami had said, but for some reason, you didn’t react that way. You felt that terrible Nanami felt in such a way for you, because you knew you didn’t feel close, even then you knew.

Even when Satoru was horrible, even when you’d smacked him, when you’d spit such vitriol at each other, something was there, in his touch, in his gaze, filled with hatred, and oh you did hate him then. You still hate what he did, it’s not forgotten even if you have forgiven him, it’s in the back of your head taunting you, scaring you, but it doesn’t change anything, it doesn’t change how you feel.

How you feel seeing women around him, when you had grown so accustomed, when you let it go, got used to it. Now, however, they look at you, the woman who used to be so inconsequential, Satoru has one hand in his pocket, the other holding the little crystal glass tumblr. You clear your throat now, and Satoru smirks.

“My beautiful wife.” He says, earning the pouts of most of them, they all flit away but Elaine, who scowls at you now. You simply give her a smile.

“Lady Elaine.”

“Your Grace.” She spits out, as Satoru pulls you into his arms, kissing you right in front of her, earning her mouth dropping. “Ah, so romantic, I wonder what the Ton would think if they knew the truth? That you were with another man, right in the next room, and I heard- ah!”

You have spilled a drink all over Lady Elaine’s dress now, feigning innocent shock, as Satoru struggles to hide his chuckles. “Oh dear, I am ever so clumsy I fear, so sorry Lady Elaine!”

“You little bitch, I-”

“You mean your Grace.” Satoru says between his teeth, an arm around your waist as she scowls up at him, people are gathering around, whispering, clearly having heard.

“Would you like your husband to know your indiscretions?” You whisper, right against her face, hands clenched into fists. Her eyes lower, and she shakes her head now. “You slept with my husband, I’ve done you no wrong. You have no right to threaten me, but just know, you will not scare me.”

“He said he didn’t even want you, you know that right?” You choke up then, and Satoru scowls.

“You mean when I kicked you out and said I only wanted her?” She can’t meet your eyes, huffing and turning away now.

“Toxic insane couple.” You can’t help but agree internally, as she is stomping away. You and Satoru look at each other, as the past seems to keep trying both of you. “I swear it, I told her to leave.”

“I believe you.”

“You do!?”

You smile a bit at his surprise. “I do. I remember checking on you that night…” 

“I know, I was awake.” He caresses your face, peering around then, as people are murmuring about the couple so in love, and you feel the weight of their gazes upon you both. “Let us go home.”

“Home?” You say softly.

“Yes, the surprise awaits.”

“It better be a good one, all this build up.”

“I think you’ll like it, Princess.”

“The bed!? It’s…”

“Gone.” Satoru grins as he leads you into his bedchambers, a brand new four post bed in the room, it’s nothing like the other one. You hesitantly walk up to it, brand new blankets, brand new frame, brand new everything.

“You… you really did this?” You murmur, looking up at him, as he closes the door behind him, walking up to you in long strides, arms wrapping around your waist, pulling your back against him. You exhale, eyes fluttering shut at how good it feels.

“I will burn every piece of furniture in this manor if you wish me to.” He whispers in your ear. “If every piece gets me one more day with you.”

You turn in his hold, breasts heaving and rising with every labored breath, his face full of desire as you yank him down to you. “You would burn that table too?”

“I’ll burn the fucking table.” You moan then, letting his lips devour yours, his hands grip your ass, bringing his thigh between yours. “Feel that fucking heat.” He whispers, and you grind helpless, craving more, more.

“You’re still… a whore.” He smirks as he works the laces of your bodice, ribbon by ribbon.

“And you’re a slutty little Princess. Aren’t you? For me?” You cry out when your breasts spill out of your top, and he’s gripping them in his big hands, kissing you again, tongue sliding against yours, swirling in your mouth. Your tongue joins him and meets him, stroke for stroke.

“For you, against… mmm… better judgment.” He’s got your skirts on the floor, undoing your stays, your hands tremble as you slide off his jacket, unbuttoning his shirt, eyeing the marble perfection that he is, your eyes lock then, as you’re both panting, both messes, until you’re bare in front of him, and he drinks you in.

“You’re beautiful. So beautiful.”

“Stop making me fall for you. I hate it.” He pauses then, brows together, lips parted just so, as you feel yourself pouring your own goddamn heart on the floor. “I’m so scared to let you have it. What if you crush it?”

“Your heart?”

“Yes. Yes… I’m scared, Satoru. Scared to feel this.”

“Well I’m fucking terrified, Duchess.” You’re stroking him then, finding his hard length over his trousers, as he is grabbing your bare ass, moaning, kissing your lips brutally.

“Of feeling this?” You ask, weak when he’s picked you up, hoisting you onto the new bed, exhaling as he looks at you with insane eyes, shaking his head, hands slipping down your waist, your hips, thumbs pressing in.

“Of you leaving me, as you should. I can’t imagine living with it, knowing I pushed the one thing I love away.” He gulps now, and you feel it, his fear, his truth. “You don’t have to love me back, you can let me love you.”

“You’re so stupid. You’re so annoying. Why do you do this?” He sighs, a hand bracing himself up, your own fingers drift down the hard muscles of his abdomen, watching them tense under your touch.

“I cannot help but beg for you to stay with me. I’ll keep begging.” He’s found you again, your slick cunt that he’d so toyed with earlier, moaning as she responds to him, slick pouring out of you. “I’ll beg every moment for any of you.”

“Fuck you.” He kisses you now, you cling to him, back arching for more of his touches, as he kisses your neck.

“I’ll fuck you, Princess. Don’t worry.” You can’t even speak as he’s scissoring his fingers in and out of you, until you climax so hard you can’t see, gasping for breath. He’s kissing down your stomach, it’s too sweet, it’s too intimate, his eyes dilated as he looks up at you, big hands gripping your thighs. “I love your taste, I love your body, I love-”

“Fuck you.” You barely manage to say it again, he smirks against your thigh, before running his tongue up your slit, already over sensitive. You scream out, head pressing back against the pillows. “Fuck you for being so… good at that!”

“I love watching you cum.” You’re crying when he’s sucking your clit into his mouth now, a hand pressing on your tummy as he does, his tongue lavishing the underside of it with hot flicks, watching you fall apart. Your hands sink into his silky locks, pulling him closer, hips bucking up for more of him, feeling his moans vibrate your clit until he has you cumming again.

This orgasm washes through your entire body, leaving you weak, he slips up your body with kisses, it’s too sweet, it’s too much. It’s not rough and stupidly insane, he’s worshiping your body with his hands, his lips, his eyes. You feel everything about to explode as your feelings overwhelm you, especially when his hand entwines with one of yours, and your eyes meet.

“Fuck you for this.” He nods just a bit, as your free hand cups his face, the aftershocks of your orgasm wrecking your resolve. “You hit me or something, you choke me, you… call me a slut. Whatever you need, don’t do this, don’t.”

“Don’t make love to you?” He whispers, and you nod jerkily.

“I can’t take it if you do.” You gasp when he presses inside your soaking entrance, thick tip drooling precum as it slips in, and you’re trembling, panting, your nails digging into his perfect skin as he sinks into your heat. He moans as you do, hovering over you, just sitting there. “D-don’t look at me like this.”

“Like you’re beautiful? Precious? Like I love you?” Your lip trembles so much you bite it to stop it, as he gently rocks out and then inside your pussy, your walls fluttering around him.

“Yes, like that. Scowl or something.” You plead, sniffling as the tears won’t stop, but he shakes his head, pulling a thigh over his arm now, sinking deeper, gasping as his tip hits your cervix, and you’re blinded when he’s grinding on it.

“Let me love you. Please.” He begs now, bracing an arm next to your head and cupping your face as he slowly slides into you, and you feel it, your body responding, the heavy weight of him, the thickness of him inside you, his heart thrumming so wildly you feel it against your breasts.

“I’m scared.” He nods, kissing you now, pressing in again, and you both kiss as he rocks into you, as he rolls his hips just so, tip dragging on your spot, now you’re lost to him, blinded, as he lowers all your defenses.

“Then just let me say it. It’s… ah… you’re so fucking tight…” He trails off, his eyes rolling back for a moment, starting to pump into you, you’re soaking his length, clinging to him as he rocks into you, faster now, but still he’s not fucking your body. He’s fucking your mind. “I’ll only say it.”

“Shut up.” You kiss him once more, moaning into his mouth as he begins pumping his thick cock inside of you, you hear it even at his gentle pace, you hear how wet you are, mingling with your shared breaths, your cries. You get further lost in him, lost in those eyes that swirl, that glitter, those lips that kiss you, the sweat that drips off his brow onto your lips.

Satoru loses himself to you, as you lose yourself to him, as he’s making love to you in a way you never knew possible, a way that is so beautiful you can’t take it. You drown in it, drown in him, every cry and gasp and breath a part of a song, a song that is both of you, that is the undeniable fact you’ve tried to hide, to shove down, to push away at every moment.

That you…

“Feel s’good, oh my god. Tight little cunt. Fuck.” He’s cursing now, going just a little faster, you know he’s trying to keep it slow, but he’s lost in you, eyes intoxicated just like you are for him, his kisses the sweetest alcohol you could ever have, a dose of laudanum could not come close to the euphoria you feel.

“Ngh… Toru…” He moans at that, placing both of your thighs up higher, dragging your hips down and sliding his cock even deeper, so deep you can’t take it, his hand comes to your tummy now, moaning.

“Feel myself here, do you, Princess?” Satoru’s words make you blush even during sex, and he takes your hand, putting it on your tummy, you feel it then, his cock bulging your tummy.

“That’s…” You move your hand, and he tilts your chin down, to watch it as he leans up on his knees, you watch your stomach bulge as he presses in, gasping, your eyes locking with his again, before looking back down. Your cum is forming a creamy ring at the base of his cock, his long fingers sliding over your body, splaying the expanse of your waist.

“Look how deep I am. Mmm….” He’s moaning as he watches, and the intensity is so much, even more so when he finds your clit with his thumb, running in little circles on it, engorged and sensitive.

“Satoru!” You cry out, and he hisses when your walls clench him, tight like a vise, his head falling back, exposing that strong neck, before his eyes are back on you, and he’s fucking you so deep, so deep you feel him everywhere, and you’re shattering around him.

“That’s it, oh god, that’s it.” He’s trembling as he lays back on you, hand digging into your hip, pressing it down to shove in so deep you’re both screaming out together, clinging to each other. “Fuck I love you.”

“Stop it, stop it, mmm…”

“I do. I can’t stop it. I can’t stop it, fucking wanna cum in your little cunt, fill you up with my seed.”

“Satoru!” He’s moaning now, fucking quicker, harder, bringing you to the brink, fucking you right through your aftershocks.

“I won’t, I won’t… just wanna. Wanna breed you. Pretty fucking pussy. Pretty little face.”

“Goddammit.” You’re digging your nails into his back, and he just moans, eyes fluttering shut, kissing you again and again.

“Cum again, please, I’m close.” He whispers against your ear now, and you take several shaky breaths, convulsing under him as he starts fucking you hard, thrusts so goddamn good, pelvis smacking against yours over and over. “Let me feel you, my pretty little Princess.”

“N-no. Say slut or something!”

“No.”

“Fuck you so much.” He smiles just a bit, before moaning once more, slowing and thickening inside of you.

“Come on pretty, once more, can’t take her, too perfect.” You can’t anymore, you grip his face, rolling your hips up, earning his groan.

“I am falling in love with you too.” He gasps then, pausing, even as his cock is throbbing, and your cunt is soaking him, he does not move. He’s in shock, eyes looking wildly. “It doesn’t mean… I don’t… that I will… cum in me, fuck.”

“What!? You-”

“Cum in me. Please.” He groans now, pumping into you more and more, nearly sobbing with you as he kisses you, as he raises your thigh, fucking you into some other realm, like you’re floating, clinging to him to exist.

“Gonna cum in you, fill you up, hmm? You want it?” You nod eagerly against his neck as he moves, hitting that spot again with his tip. “Take it all, can you?”

“Yes, y-yes.” You manage to whisper, and now you he’s pulsing, and you feel your walls clamp down around his thickness, and he cums hard as he slams his lips on yours, his hot seed spilling into you, filling you so full. “Ah!”

“F-fuck…” He groans as you cum with him, your walls pulsing around him, his name on your lips, your name on his, his eyes never leaving yours, even as he’s lost in his own pleasure. He’s filling you with hot sticky cum, coating your walls, pumping in slowly now, letting out a shaky breath. “Painting your pretty insides. Princess…”

“Toru…” You whine as you both come down, sticky with sweat, and between your thighs his cum and yours drip down his length, a mess of arousal.

“Holy fuck I’ve never…” He shakes his head, and the weight of what you’ve both done hits you. “You truly love me? How?” He’s stroking your head, gulping, and you smile through more tears, struggling to come to, as he eases out of your pussy, a mess of fluids dripping, making you flush as you watch.

“I do not have an answer for how, only that I am falling. I’m scared that this happiness is fleeting. That this will end horribly. But I want this. Want you.” He kisses you again so deeply, moaning as his lips smack over and over, you’re shuddering at how good it feels, meeting his kiss each time, basking in how it feels.

It should be scarier, falling for Satoru.

It should terrify the fuck out of you, maybe it does.

But it also feels good. It feels good to say it finally, to put words to the things that have tortured you. “I won’t let your heart be hurt. I swear I’ll try everything.”

“I shall hold you to it.” You say, as he strokes your cheek, smiling so big, his smile makes you melt, filling your heart so full you think it will burst.

“Will you finally sleep in the bed?” He asks, and you bite your lip, nodding, then as he’s pulled you against him later that evening, wrapping an arm around your waist, you lay in Duke Gojo’s bed, with him behind you, already sleepy, already too damn comfortable. “Mmm, I never thought to have you here.”

“Satoru… you’ll do anything for me, you say?”

“Oh god… what is it?”

“I want you to get rid of the table.” You say with an evil little grin, raising your brows, Satoru laughs, shaking his head.

“I can get rid of the table. What else?” He pecks kisses on your cheek now, you sigh happily.

“That will do for now.”

“Mmm… good night, needy Princess.”

“Good night, Satoru.”

Gojo’s POV

The next morning you are the one up first, Satoru feels you brushing his hair back gently, he opens his eyes and smiles at you, you return in, blushing so pretty, your usually put together hair a mess from last night. You’re only wearing a little silk chemise, a pretty blue one that feels so soft against his bare chest, it’s nearly as soft as your skin, pressed against him.

You’re toying with his hair now, spiking it up and giggling, his thigh is between both of yours, his cock throbbing with need already, craving to be back inside of you, craving to cum in you again and again. He grabs one of your thighs now, hitching it over his, watching you bite your lower hip, your eyelids lower, desire filling your pretty eyes, mirroring his own.

He’s slipped your chemise up, grabbing your ass in his hand, his cock brushing over your slit, through thin material, which you quickly soak with your arousal. His heart races as your nails dig into his biceps, then your head falls back, he starts kissing down your neck, biting it then, hard, your skin between his teeth. Your nails dig in harder, your hips rolling as you grind against him.

Last night he’d wanted to make love to you, to show you how beautiful you are to him, how much he loves you, but of course, he loves when you’re a freaky brat too, and now he’s craving just that. He quickly turns you, to where your back is against him, the curve of your ass against his hard length, he pulls it out as he pulls your thigh high over his arms, starting to rub his tip against your folds.

“Satoru!” You cry out, voice cracking in the middle, your head falling back, he wraps his other hand around your neck, moaning as he finally kisses your lips.

“Want this cock in you, slutty brat?” He whispers, you respond so goddamn well, starting to soak him now, dripping wet and slippery as he slides more and more, pressing just a bit against your clit. His tip leaks precum on it, and you’re gasping now, so sensitive.

“Fuck you, Satoru.” He smiles against your neck, biting you again, feeling your body tense up, cunt gushing arousal all over him.

“You’re soaking fucking wet, slutty pussy.”

“Mnh…” You look back at him then, eyes dilated, lips parted, your pretty breasts rise and fall with each breath.

“Want me to break you, Princess?”

“Shut up and fuck me, Satoru.” He moans, fuck he loves your bitchy attitude, he wants to fuck it right out of you then back into you.

“No fingering? That needy?” He asks, and you whine then, reaching back and grabbing his cock, placing it at your entrance, he groans then, feeling his tip push past the tight ring of muscles, you start cumming just from that, little hole tightening, making him shiver at how good it feels.

“Oh my god. Please.” You whisper.

“So sweet suddenly? Need something?” He presses in deeper, pulling back out, earning your huff of irritation, before he shoves his cock deeper now, your walls fluttering around him, feeling so fucking good he can’t take it. “Mmm…”

“More, more… I need more.” You plead so prettily, a hand reaching back to grab at his arm as he fucks into you fully, bottoming out in your tight little cunt, stuffing you so full, cursing at how perfect you feel. You’re made for him, you must be. “Satoru!”

“Desperate, cumming and I’m not trying.” He earns your scowl back at him now, but he fucks it away quickly, tip bullying against your cervix now, thinking about busting so deep inside you, filling you up again.

“You talk too bloody much.” You say angrily, so he smirks, fucking into you harder, lifting your thigh and pounding your cunt now. You fall apart around him, moaning loudly, and he kisses your neck, fucking you through it, feeling your walls tighten.

“That’s a good little slut, so perfect. You’re made for me.” You’re shaking now, he can tell you’re sensitive, overstimulated, so he decides to torture you worse, reaching  around your hip, his thumb pressing into your clit.

“F-fuck, too much!” You’re wriggling now, so he starts to thrust even harder, you’re so wet for him, soaking his hand, soaking the sheets.

“Too much, thought you could take it? ‘Fuck me Satoru!’”

“I hate you.” You turn your head to him, eyes narrowed even as they’re cock drunk on him, he grins as he gets you close again, rubbing your clit as he fucks your soaking wet little cunt, your glare turning him on as much as when you yank on his hair, dragging his lips to yours. “I can take it, you… arrogant… ah!”

“That’s it, cum like a good little whore f’me, only me.” He huffs, and then drinks your cries, as you convulse against him. Fuck you feel so good, he tenses now, as your walls try to milk him, and your eyes are rolled back, mouth lolled open, cumming on his cock all over again. “Want me to fill you up again? Make you so fuckin full of me?”

He’s pressing on your stomach, imagining you round with him, for some reason it makes him fucking feral, changing everything he’s ever known or thought. You are nodding eagerly, barely whispering his name, he grins as he realize he’s fucked your thoughts out of your head. He wants it to be him and only him there, just as you are all that’s inside his head.

You’re everything.

“Then beg for it.”

“Fuck off!”

“Beg for it, brat. Wanna have my baby?” You whine out again, taking several breaths.

“This is madness…”

“You’re madness.” He kisses you again, feeling your soft lips melding to his, as he pushes in so deep and rocks inside you.

“Please.” You whisper finally, and he moans and starts spilling inside you, coating your velvety walls with so much cum it’s insane. You seem to make him cum a ridiculous amount every fucking time. You are pulsing around him, as he’s throbbing in you, as if she wants to milk more.

“G-greedy pussy, she wants more?” He manages, eyes rolling back in his head as he slowly pushes more, you just nod, a weak little whimper.

Satoru eases out of you then, watching the mess of cum dribble out of your pussy, he reaches down and slides a finger through it, bringing it up to your mouth, and you suck it clean. You’re looking so pretty with your cheeks flushed, hairs sticking to your damp forehead, looking up at him through your lashes, and he’s lost again, lost in you.

“I’ll never let you out of this bed.” He says then, and you laugh a bit, caressing his cheek. “I’m so in love with you, evil succubus.”

“Succubus?”

“It’s a sex demon-”

“Satoru! You’re awful.” He just smirks, pressing you down on your back now, kissing down between your perfect breasts, your hips shift now, as his hands set on your little waist and you brush his hair back. “Should this feel so natural?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never felt this.” He says, sincerely, as you hold his heart in your pretty little hands, and now he knows he has yours, something he doesn’t deserve, but he craves it. Needs it, needs you, like a consuming madness that increases with every moment he breathes.

“Me either.” You whisper, easing his fears, his worries. He kisses your tummy, picturing it now, full of him, making him hard again.

“Let’s stay in bed all day. Fuck duties.” He says, and you laugh, shaking your head at him. “What, we never had a honeymoon.”

“No, we didn’t, we…”

“I was terrible.” He rests his head on your chest, loathing setting in, but you do not rub it in his face, his mistakes, you just sigh, brushing his hair back, and fuck it feels so good.

“We have things to do, lazy Duke.”

“Lazy!?”

You’re grinning as he leans up, then the servants are knocking, and he sighs, kissing you over and over. He wants to stay in this bubble, he’s so terrified of what can come between you both, especially last night. Your mother’s cruelty, Lady Elaine being a royal bitch, you both handled it, but how much of his own mess would he have to deal with?

Your POV

Another day in town, this time a much better off part of Satoru’s estates, but it still required much work as well. The villages are already much improved, you and Satoru are starting to feel so good about it all, about what you are doing together. Today you’re focusing on more fortunate people certainly, but there still are many matters you both need to attend to.

You are talking to some of the tenants as Satoru does more negotiating, when suddenly you see a tall dark haired businessman in a suit, and recognize him as the lawyer, Nanami’s friend Higuruma. You pause, blinking a bit, seeing him speaking to one of the business owners across the street, only for Nanami Kento to walk out with him.

You feel sick to your stomach when his hazel eyes catch you, knowing you have done just what he thought you would, and his lips set into a stern line as Satoru comes out of the building, pulling you against him, smiling. You cannot smile back, you’re panicking now, chest so tight, as you begin to remember, the hurt on Nanami’s face, the fucking pain you caused.

“Too long with stuffy men, need my bratty Princess.” He murmurs, kissing you gently, and it feels so good, but you know then, who’s watching. You try to pull away a bit, to explain, when suddenly Nanami is standing right in front of you both.

Satoru scowls at him, pulling his lips off you, and you look between the two men now, throat tightening even more as the panic sets in, as everything around you seems to almost spin, getting dizzy. Nanami scowls at Satoru right back, jaw clenched, his hand in a fist on his briefcase. Higuruma comes quickly, putting a hand on Nanami’s shoulder.

“Nanami…” He cautions.

“It’s you.” Satoru growls, stepping up to him now. You panic further, chest heaving as you put a hand to it.

“It’s you.” Nanami growls right back.

You look between them in horror, the man you came to when Satoru was being his most cruel, and you ended things with him, and now the man who had been so cruel, you’d woke up in his arms. You had let him cum in you, fuck you begged him to, so quickly too, as if everything Nanami said about you was true. You read the hurt all over his face, and the fury on Satoru’s.

You mutter under your breath then…

“Shit.”

This was a long one, was it too long aha? Let me know your thoughts I always appreciate hearing them!

Taglist is too many apparently lol! I'll tag the rest in comments <3 @kalopsia-flaneur @bunheadusa @7thsthings @disilluzions  @antisocialinlw @Sukunassfinger @lelsforlino @heeknow @muvasuperior @prince-wyiilder @lavender-hvze @ssetsuka  @labelt-san  @sadmonke @philiatothephobia @ambiguouslady42 @stromynight @dreamygirli3 @jjknanamin @jazlenekasi @victoriaaaa00 @wuvnada @valleydoli @nanasukii28 @sw3etnena @dark-agate @tamaki-simp @yuuuumii @givluv2tyy

Until Next Time, Masochistic Readers

Part Twelve Here

[pellucid-constellations]

Are You Bored Yet?

Pairing: College!Bucky x Tutor!Reader

Summary: God, you hated Bucky. Bucky probably hated you, too. Maybe. It was hard to tell when he was drunk and calling you pretty at a party you shouldn't have gone to.

Word count: 8k

Warnings: Alcohol, annoyance to lovers, a bit of angst, a scary man in a parking lot, frat!bucky c:

a/n:​​​ I am so excited to finally post something!! It only took me four months 😅 If you enjoy it please please let me know ❤️❤️

Masterlist

~~

12:59 pm.

The birchwood table nestled in the back of the library was long but otherwise empty, the only thing occupying it being your laptop and quite a few books. He wasn’t late. Yet. You weren’t going to hold onto that hope, however.

Tutoring Bucky Barnes was not what you had in mind when you volunteered for the peer assistance program at your university. It was true you were only using the club to boost your resume, but you had assumed the only people reaching out for help would be those that actually wanted it. Unfortunately, that was not the case. 

Sure, Bucky wanted help. Just not with anything that actually warranted the word. He wanted help sweet talking the cops so they wouldn't shut down his parties. He wanted help recruiting girls to show up to his parties. And—the one thing you could actually do—he wanted help passing his classes with the minimum GPA required to not get kicked out of his frat. So he could continue to throw parties. 

Everything in his life revolved around his fraternity, which made you very important to him. When he wanted you to be. 

With your apparently astounding knowledge of biology (you took notes during lectures), you became the star in Bucky’s life every Monday and Wednesday from 1:00 pm (give or take ten minutes) to 2:00 pm. He was also very attentive during the thirty minute phone calls he initiated prior to tests, and always looked happy to see you when he passed you devouring a bagel at the crack of dawn in the dining hall. 

Every situation in which you had come in contact with Bucky was isolated and purposeful (minus the bagel). You didn’t hang out or invite each other places, and you were almost positive that if you were to see him in his natural habitat, you would want to tutor him even less than you did now, and that was saying something. So you were important to Bucky during the times you were supposed to be important, and he was important to you in the sense that he was a job. 

But as your laptop blinked the numbers 1:22 pm back at your unimpressed expression, Bucky became much less important today. You took in a long, tortured breath before sending your gaze up to the ceiling, giving it another three minutes before you truly gave up on him for the day. 

One minute. 

Two minutes. 

The library really needed new ceiling tiles. 

1:25 pm and you snapped your laptop shut. Your fingers itched to send yet another complaint about this whole ordeal Natasha’s way, but you stopped yourself. She had already heard plenty about Barnes at this point, plus she always gave you a weird look every time you came stomping into the apartment, grumbling about something else he had done. 

You hated her weird looks, all raised eyebrows and stiff lips.

With your backpack heaved onto the table and your things slowly funneling in, you figured a nap was the best reward for sitting in the library for an unnecessary twenty-five minutes. Your last prickle of irritation was stifled at the prospect of a warm bed as you stood, only to find that irritation had returned to you tenfold. In the form of Bucky Barnes. 

“You going somewhere?” he seemed to taunt, his bag slung casually over one shoulder. 

Your jaw ticked. “Home.” 

His mouth turned up at one side, an expression you had learned meant he found you amusing. He never seemed to outright laugh at your annoyance, but apparently, it was hard to tamp down all of the joy he got out of it. Bucky took two long strides to meet the table you were attempting to abandon. 

“But I still got about—” he checked his watch “—thirty-three minutes? And an arsenal of questions about amino acids. Help a guy out.” 

“And I still got—” you checked the nonexistent watch on your wrist “—no patience for this today. You’re over twenty minutes late, Barnes. Use that watch to set an alarm on Wednesday and I’ll tell you everything you’ll inevitably forget about amino acids then.” 

He groaned, rounding the table to set firm hands on your shoulders as he hovered behind you. “Sit. I’ll buy you a coffee and I promise I won’t be late on Wednesday, okay? I was dealing with something before this and lost track of time.” 

“Were you dealing with another sorority girl in your bed? Who was it last week? Amber? No, Michelle?” 

“It’s a Monday, y/n. Cut me some slack.” 

“You came to me on a Wednesday with a hangover,” you deadpanned.

Bucky grimaced, the expression visible to you as he managed to guide you back into your chair. “Oat milk, right? A double?” 

You grumbled, crossing your arms over your chest as he tossed his bag by your feet and jogged over to the coffee cart just outside the library. He fumbled with his wallet when he went to pay, and you watched him point to the carton of oat milk the barista had yet to reach for. His greek letters were printed on the gray hoodie he had haphazardly thrown over his shoulders, and you held the reprimand on your tongue when you saw the matching sweatpants he donned. 

The last time he had shown up in his pajamas—late—you’d had some choice words for him. Bucky turned around with your coffee then, poking the straw through the lid and sending you a sheepish smile through the window. 

He was lucky you accepted bribes. 

~~

“Please,” the boy across from you continued to beg, a pen held loosely between pliant fingers. “Just ask her, that’s all I want. You can even come too.” 

“Oh, wow, the great frat president letting me come to his stupid toga party? How could I ever thank you enough?” 

It was Wednesday now, and Bucky was surprisingly on time to the tutoring session. You’d gotten through about half of the last bio lecture before he started asking you ridiculous questions that had nothing to do with the content. Today, he was dead set on getting your lab partner from chemistry to go to his party this weekend. 

“Okay, yeah, you could come to whatever party you want, you know? I put you on the list—but this one will be even better if you’d just do this one thing for me.” 

You finally tore your eyes from your laptop, glancing lazily at him. “And what would make this one so—wait, what list?” 

He waved you off. “The one at the door. Did it like… the second week we started this? Anyways, Wanda?” 

You let this new information settle and tried to ignore whatever implications came with being on some frat list thanks to Bucky. He had never explicitly invited you to any of his parties over the past few months and you had never asked to come. Apparently, you could have shown up whenever you wanted to and had a grand old time. 

Not that that sounded the least bit grand. 

Bucky was looking at you still, all pleading features and a soft, infuriating smile on his lips. When he wasn’t talking to random girls in the library or taking annoying phone calls in the middle of your sessions, he was sort of endearing. In a terrible, awful sense. 

You groaned, throwing yourself back against your chair in begrudging defeat. “I don’t even talk to her outside of chem. Don’t you think it’d be a little weird to invite her to a party that I’m not even going to?” 

“So come,” he answered simply, as if that was in the realm of possibilities. 

“Yeah,” you scoffed. “Sure, I’ll come to your party, Barnes.” 

“Great,” he grinned. “Vision’s gonna be so hyped.” 

You watched as he pulled his phone from his pocket and kept your lie to yourself. He wouldn’t notice that you didn’t show up on Friday, and likely wouldn’t even bring it up the following Monday. He always had such vibrant, headache-inducing stories that you were sure your absence would be nothing more than a fleeting footnote. 

“You have a toga, right?” he mumbled, face still screwed up in concentration as he continued his text. 

“Isn’t it just a sheet all twisted up?” you asked, shutting your computer. Tutoring was obviously over. 

Bucky pocketed his phone again, brows raised in amusement. “Depends on your motives for the night.” 

“And my motives wouldn’t be to… wear a toga?” 

He chuckled and huffed out your name, resting an arm along the back of the chair to his right—your chair. “Other motives. Like if you’re trying to get someone’s attention.” 

You blinked at the warmth along your back. “Oh, of course. Then I would twist up a pillowcase instead, right?”

“Something like that.” 

He smelled like coconut. Like a day at the beach but afterwards, when the sunscreen still lingered in the air but fresh clothes covered skin that had been warmed by the sun. You could usually ignore whatever expensive combination he had on his skin, but when he got close like this it was almost impossible. 

Part of you always wanted to chuck his arm away when he leaned over you, but another part of you liked that he kept it there. It was a strange part of you, the same one that relished the looks you got from sorority girls in the library and harbored a sense of pride each time he made a blatant attempt to touch you. 

You had spent fleeting moments analyzing these emotions and chalked them up to some internalized desire for validation. Nothing else. Bucky was a hot guy and everyone knew that, so having his attention—in any capacity—felt nice. Sometimes. Meaning right now it was nice that he was looking at you with his arm practically glued to your back, but next week when he showed up late with a hangover and tried to steal the jacket off your body it would be not so nice. 

The duality of man. 

It helped your partial insanity that Bucky would never actually be interested in you. You weren’t in a sorority or interested to his parent’s money, and, worst of all, you didn’t know how to maneuver a sheet into a toga. When he put his arm around you or moved your hair from your eyes as you leaned over a book, it was probably out of habit. It felt nice, but you knew reality. This was a passing phase, and by the summer you wouldn’t even speak to him anymore.

“I’ll text you more info about everything,” Bucky called, pulling you from your thoughts. “You can come early and I’ll help you with that pillowcase.” 

You froze, the book you were shoving into your bag pausing in your hands. “Uh, maybe.” 

“No, seriously, it’d be better if you came early. I was kidding about the pillowcase but if you come on time it’ll be too crazy for me to show you around.” 

“You don’t have to show me around, Bucky. I’ve been to a house party before.” 

“Y/n, are you not coming to this thing?” Bucky accused, swiping the book from your hands and softly tossing it on the table. It still made a loud thud that had a few bitter looks thrown your way. 

“Dude!” you whispered, meeting each mean gaze with your apologetic one. “Why does it matter if I come? You just wanted Wanda anyway.” 

He knocked your hand away when you went to reach for the book again, encircling your wrist with his fingers. “You just lied to me. Straight to my face. You said you’d come and now you gotta.” 

You gave his fingers an experimental tug, but he was unrelenting in his soft grip. You glared at him through your lashes, meeting his uncharacteristically stern gaze that contrasted the humor on his lips. 

“You ever hear of sarcasm?” you whispered with a half-hearted bite. 

“Unfortunately, that’s about all I hear outta you,” he smirked back. 

You rolled your eyes, finally yanking hard enough to free yourself from him. “Then you should have known I wasn’t going to come. No matter what ‘list’ you put me on.” 

“What else could you possibly have going on on a Friday night?” 

Ouch. You felt your brows furrow even though you didn’t will them to, and even worse, you felt a rash defensiveness lodge itself in your throat. You hated the heat that now prickled along the skin of your neck, and you hated even more how it extinguished all of the good warmth you had felt from him earlier. 

This was humiliation, surely—the kind that only came from feeling small. 

“You don’t have to be a dick,” you seethed, snapping up the remainder of your belongings. “Just because I don’t want to go to your stupid frat doesn't mean I have nothing to do. I don’t spend all of my time hoping to get invited to ridiculous parties.” 

Bucky shifted up in his seat, eyes blown just a fraction wider. “Whoa, I didn’t mean—hey, stop a sec, I didn’t mean it like that.” 

“Whatever, Bucky,” you droned, as a new temperature seeped into the skin of your palms and made them clammy. Any semblance of delusion you’d fallen into earlier was long gone now, but you knew to expect that. He wasn’t interested in you and you weren’t interested in him. But embarrassment wasn’t a good feeling, regardless of a multitude of reality checks. 

Bucky got up when you did, his clothes looking creased and lived in. “We still have time in our session,” he defended, arm jutting out to the table. “C’mon, I didn’t mean you don’t have friends.” 

Your glare sharpened. “Great, another insinuation.” 

Bucky sputtered out incoherent words as you continued your trek outside, resorting to grabbing your wrist again, this time with more urgency. You felt the heat in you simmer down to a dull throb as he made contact, mostly out of respect for your future self. If you made this a huge deal it would only embarrass you more. 

“Look, it doesn’t even matter, okay?” you huffed, but he just tugged you forward. It was then that you realized you were in the doorway of the library, effectively blocking it off from anyone trying to leave. Bucky pulled you close enough to his chest that you weren’t in the way anymore. His cologne was back with a vengeance, your nose just inches from his collar.  

You took a steadying breath, blinking away the remnants of shame. “It doesn’t matter, I overreacted.” 

He clicked his tongue. “I’m still apologizing. I didn’t mean any of that stuff you were talking about.” 

Of course he did. You were sure he thought it all the time. He just didn’t mean to say it out loud. 

“It’s fine,” you rushed. “I have to go, anyway. Office hours.” 

“Okay,” he nodded, soft and low, like he just remembered he was in a library. “You’ll still come this weekend, right? Even if Wanda can’t?” 

“You have some kind of girl quota you need to meet?” you pressed.

Bucky smiled, still so close to you that you could feel the small breath that accompanied the expression. “And she’s back.” 

You left without promising anything, and Bucky left feeling like you had. 

~~

Sometime between Wednesday and Friday, your detestment for frat parties had snowballed into determination. You were going to go and you were going to look like you were having so much fun it was ridiculous. Then, on Monday, when Bucky would usually poke and prod about what you’d gotten up to over the past few days, you were going to pretend that it was nothing for you. That you did that every weekend. 

Of course, you didn’t. Your weekends typically consisted of calm nights with friends or dinners near campus. You’d been to a party before, sure, but you didn’t exactly frequent those kinds of scenes. 

Bucky had continued to make it clear that you were invited. He had texted you a few times, prompting you to come and thanking you for getting Wanda to agree. The messages looked strange under the plethora of biology related questions, but that just spurred you further into action. You weren’t just a tutor with no social life, and Bucky was going to see that tonight. You couldn’t remember doing something out of pure spite before, but you figured having fun to prove a point wasn’t the worst thing. 

Wanda pulled you out of your thoughts as the Uber rounded the last dark corner and revealed an overcrowded house with too many lights on. She rambled on about some guy she couldn’t wait to see and confirmed that she would likely be spending the night. You expected as much; it hadn’t taken much convincing to get her to come. If this night resulted in anything good it was apparently the blossoming relationship between your new friend and a man you’d never met. 

Wanda continued to chat as she yanked you out of the car and past the yard littered with sparse grass. The music was loud already—the type of loud that you needed to be at least a little drunk to enjoy. And that was the plan. 

“Okay, if I start dancing on a table you pull me down. And if you start dancing on a table I support you, right?” Wanda giggled, her voice now raised as you walked past the threshold of the house. 

“Exactly,” you yelled back. A guy nodded to you as he leaned against the front door, his eyes glancing up from his phone and then returning. It seemed Bucky’s ‘list’ was a page on some guy’s notes app. How luxurious. “Let’s drink.” 

The next hour was a blur. You tried your hardest to get as drunk as possible and Wanda tried her hardest to find the British man she was enamored with. You hadn’t seen Bucky, but you figured he wasn’t looking for you too hard since you hadn’t responded to any of his texts. Not out of anger, but because you didn’t know what to say. Somehow, with alcohol warming your blood and music vibrating your skin, none of that mattered anymore. 

You: Your house is soooo dirty

Your phone jostled in your grip, people bumping into you from every side. When he didn’t answer in the thirty seconds you spent staring at the screen, you locked it and continued on with your mission. 

After a few too many shots of hard liquor, you switched to beer. Gross, but decidedly less likely to make you pass out on the staircase of this house. Because you weren’t lying in your text—it was slightly disgusting. You figured you should clarify that with Bucky. You reached for your phone once again, knocking your head against the wall in the process and giggling to yourself. You had no idea where Wanda went. 

The device was snatched from your hands just as quickly as the screen had lit up your face. 

“You ever answer this thing?” an accusing voice called out. “Or do you just insult people and put it on do not disturb?” 

The look on Bucky’s face would have made you roll your eyes in any other circumstance. Right now, however, it had a startled laugh bursting past your lips. You clutched at your stomach as the laugh grew and you found yourself tipping forward until your forehead met his chest. You felt delirious, almost silly. A hand came around to rest on the back of your neck.

“Alright, alright.” Bucky’s words rumbled against your face. “I get it, this is hilarious.” 

“Your… your face,” you breathed out, catching your breath enough to part from him. “It was all—” you mimicked the straight line of his eyebrows, voice raising in a mocking tone. “—You don’t ever answer your phone. You’re so boring, y/n, answer your phone.” 

“I didn’t call you boring. Hey—hey,” Bucky stressed, reaching for you as you leaned too far to the side, a smile still lingering on your face. “Jesus, y/n, how much did you have to drink?” 

You went to mock him again, but his fingers on your jaw stopped you. He tilted your head up and to the left, and although he was much more composed than you were, you could still smell the alcohol on his breath. You scrunched up your nose as he continued his inspection. 

“Why’re you being so uptight?” you slurred, trying and failing to push away from him. “I thought you were all like, ‘I’m Bucky and I party and get drunk and have sex with girls.’”

Bucky pulled you forward as you laughed at your impression of him, his shaking head making you blink away a bout of dizziness. You toppled over a set of stairs as he threaded his fingers through yours, and then you stumbled through a doorway and onto carpeted floors. Being pressed into an uncomfortable chair was the most jarring action, the world still spinning as you sat. 

“You’re even more mean when you're drunk,” you heard Bucky mumble. You couldn’t quite catch him as he moved around whatever room you were in. “And I don’t talk like that.” 

You let out a careless sigh and leaned back. “You soooo talk like that.” 

Something cold pressed to your hand, followed by another touch to the back of your neck. You gazed down at the water bottle being guided up to your lips and couldn’t find it in you to fight against it, despite the small spark of defiance on the tip of your tongue. After about four large swallows, Bucky was satisfied. 

He asked again how much you’d had to drink. 

You answered that you didn’t know—that it didn’t matter because he wasn’t your dad and you were having fun like you always did. He bit the inside of his cheek and didn’t say anything for the next few moments. 

And then, “Thought you weren’t gonna come tonight.” 

You hummed, rolling your head against the chair to look up at his standing form. “Of course I was going to come. I love parties. Love drinking alcohol.” 

His expression twisted into something you couldn’t recognize. “God, you’re so drunk.” 

“M’not even that drunk!” 

“You’re willingly in my room right now. You’re plastered.” 

“Maybe I want to be in your room.” 

“We both know that’s not true.” 

You chuckled breathily, closing your eyes so you wouldn’t have to see the pretty flush of Bucky’s face. “You think you know everything, don’t you? Don’t know much about me though. Or biology.” 

Bucky kneeled down to the height of the chair. “And what do I not know about you?” 

“So much.” 

“How much?” 

You bit into your lip and cracked an eye open, catching the amusement that had slipped past the strange mask of his emotions. With blissful ignorance, you heaved yourself forward on the chair, your nose a few inches from Bucky’s. His eyes didn’t waver from yours as you swayed. 

“You don’t know that I’m the most interesting person on Earth,” you boasted, fingers gripping the upholstery of your seat. 

“That right?” Bucky probed, his voice a melodic hum. 

“Yup, I’m always really busy and even though you think I’m some boring biology tutor I’m actually super cool and, like, go to raves and stuff.” 

His brow twitched but his mouth stayed soft. “I’ve never said you were boring. And I don’t think you’ve ever been to a rave.” 

You groaned loudly and flopped against the backrest of the chair. “See! I’m telling you I do all this cool stuff and I’m so drunk my fingers are buzzing and you still don’t believe me.” 

You crossed your arms with a huff, a small pout forming on your lips. In any other context, this behavior would probably embarrass you to no end. In the dim light of Bucky’s room where you felt the feeling leave your fingers and the care leave your mind, you were just disgruntled, not embarrassed. If you remembered this tomorrow the latter would surely catch up to you.

Bucky stared at you from his spot on the ground, his gaze a bit foggy and unfocused. He was clearly intoxicated, as you deduced earlier, and it made him look more wild. Mused hair and pink cheeks, he looked like he’d been having plenty of fun before he found you. It was distracting. He was distracting you from proving that you were having a blast.

“What?” you snapped, the tone a testament to the drunken fit you were throwing. 

“You’re so fucking pretty.” 

He must be really, really drunk. Despite your clouded mind, you knew that, but the words affected you just the same. Your lips parted as a new lightness both lit up and compressed your chest, and Bucky watched the movement. 

“Yeah,” you scoffed, but it was hardly a scoff. “Sure, Bucky. How much did you have to drink—” 

“I’m not lying. I’ve thought about you in my room for weeks and now you’re here and you’re so pretty. Even when you’re yelling at me.” 

“You’ve… thought about me in your room?” 

Bucky shuffled forward and you subconsciously parted your legs to allow the space for him. “I think about you everywhere.” 

This was crazy. It was certifiably insane. A voice in the back of your head—Natasha’s voice, it sounded like—was screaming at you to stop and think about the situation at hand. He was drunk, you were even more drunk, and he was far too close to you. He had ushered you in here with good intentions and had sobered you up a fraction, but things had taken a turn and this was a sensitive situation. The kind of sensitive that altered your reality and his and probably a bunch of other people’s you’d never met. 

Or it could be nothing and you were over exaggerating. 

But then Bucky’s hand was warming your thigh. You’d felt the press of it on your back and your shoulder and your head before, but it had never been on your thigh. It felt heavy there, hot. His other hand moved to touch your face and he propped himself up on one knee. His thumb brushed your cheek. Words tumbled from your mouth before you registered that you were speaking. 

“Are you going to kiss me?” 

Why would you ask that? Who asks Bucky Barnes if he’s going to kiss them? 

“Would you let me?” he responds. 

“Yes.” 

He didn’t waste any time, his mouth hot against yours. He tasted like mint and vodka and his lips moved so slowly it ached. You had expected a fervor behind his lips, but instead you got a build up, an orchestra reaching its crescendo. He was kissing you like you were important, like this wasn’t some random hookup in his bedroom at 1 o’clock in the morning, and you had to catch your breath when he parted from you. 

But he moved back in so quickly after your brief respite, and you were eager to give him more. This was crazy, insane. This was the best kiss you’d ever have and also the worst. This was months of staring at his stupid lips when he tried explaining concepts back to you, but this was also weeks of feeling small in his presence. Bucky slid his hand back to press against your hair and you didn’t feel small anymore. 

A loud thud from the hallway interrupted the silence you’d created, and Bucky pulled back, keeping his hands on you as he craned his neck around to stare at the door. He waited a beat, and then two, and then he turned back to you. The moment was gone, but he was still touching you. You weren’t sure what you wanted—if you wanted him to kiss you again or run out the door—but when he slid his hands from your body and rubbed them down his jeans, it became clear that was not what you wanted. 

A knot formed in your stomach when he met your gaze again, and you tried blinking the feeling away. It didn’t work. 

“Um,” Bucky began, his voice sounding more clear, his tone not holding the weight it had.

Your plan had backfired. Severely. This was a mess and you needed to save yourself before you ended this night even more humiliated.

You were still drunk. Pretend you were still plastered. 

You giggled airily, the sound burning your throat. “That was loud.” 

Bucky blinked at you in what you assumed was disbelief. “Probably just someone trying to find the bathroom,” he clarified.

You shrugged, nudging him back with your knee as you stood from the chair. “I’m bored now.” You took fast steps to the door, your words foreign to you. “Thanks for the water,” you all but gritted out. 

You expected him to get up. Not to run after you or proclaim his love or even say anything. But you expected him to get up. 

He didn’t, and you couldn’t understand how the knot in your stomach had moved to your throat. Or how it made tears spring to your eyes when your feet hit the sidewalk outside. Your Uber came and you couldn’t understand how you felt hot and cold at the same time. How it was freezing outside but you were sweating. 

You couldn’t understand why you were crying over a boy that so often infuriated you, or why he kissed you in his bedroom. The reasonable side of you sent gentle reminders that he was in a frat and kissing people is just what he did. All the time. But the unreasonable side of you won out tonight, and it was telling you that this felt different.

That you should be different, somehow.

~~

Bucky: You’re here???

Bucky: Where are you?

Bucky: Y/n answer your damn phone

Bucky: This place is fucking packed tonight I thought you weren’t coming 

You stared at the text messages you hadn’t read last night, the bright light of your phone burning into your retinas. You had a brutal hangover, and the memory of the disaster in Bucky’s room felt like an even bigger one. 

You’d gone through a myriad of emotions the night before, tossing around excuses and speeches in your head until you were so exhausted you let the alcohol in your system lull you to sleep. With all of that delirious thinking, you’d landed on blacking out. You were going to tell Bucky you blacked out last night and couldn’t remember a thing. He obviously wouldn’t care and would probably appreciate it. 

Saturday was slow-moving. Reruns of television shows and bags of popcorn and overthinking. Natasha was at her parent’s house in the city, so you had no one to bounce your racing thoughts off of. You certainly weren’t going to text her about it. 

When the evening finally rolled around and your attempts at distracting yourself with mind-numbing movies failed, you checked your email. You always tried not to on the weekends, but doing anything else sounded much less appealing. 

Unfortunately, you didn’t get past the first one. 

From: University Peer Assistance Program 

Dear Y/n Y/l/n, 

This is an automated message from the campus peer assistance program. We thank you for your continued devotion to the betterment of students at this school. At this time, your tutoring placement with James Barnes has ended. We will search for a new placement to fill your current hours. 

Thank you, 

University Peer Assistance 

You blinked at the email, then blinked again. The breath left your chest and the muscles on your face twitched, but you were otherwise frozen.

This was what you wanted, wasn’t it? To be free from the haughty frat boy that didn’t even listen to you when you tried to help him raise his grades. You wanted someone nice, someone that had the same goals as you and appreciated the color-coded notes you took for them. Bucky only tried to get a rise out of you. He sat too close and made fun of you and put you on lists you didn’t ask to be on. 

But he had kissed you. He had kissed you and then tutor-dumped you. 

You knew you weren’t his type, but were you really that bad? Was the kiss so terrible? 

Every inferiority complex you had developed exploded. You over-analyzed things that had already happened, things you had said. Not just at the party, but in the library, the coffee shops, the lecture halls. 

Was he really willing to risk his position in the frat just to avoid you? 

The strangle tickle of tears itched to be released from your eyes again, but you pressed it down. No, this wasn’t on you. He had kissed you. He had dragged you into his room and stumbled on pretty words. If he didn’t want you to tutor him anymore because of his stupid mistake, fine. 

His mistake. 

That word felt wrong. 

You tossed your phone on the couch with vigor. The clock above the television read out 10 pm, but that meant little to you as you slid on your shoes at the front door. You were wearing sweatpants and a jacket that was far too big on you, sadness and frustration and raw confusion propelling you down your apartment stairs. 

Ice cream would fix this. 

The only place open at this time was the gas station at the edge of campus. It wasn’t university affiliated and was usually overrun with belligerent greek life trying to buy alcohol, but the decision-making part of your brain was currently shut off. 

Ice cream, anger, probably watching tiktoks until your eyes were too heavy to keep open—those were the only things rattling in your head. 

You yanked open the gas station door after your short walk, the glass smudged and fogged from the cold night. The fluorescent lights aggravated the headache you’d been sporting all day and the floor made sticking noises with each step you took. To add insult to injury, there were only three cartons of ice cream left, and they weren’t even the good flavors. Grabbing the least offensive one, you made your way to the small line of people by the register. 

“Nice outfit.” 

Too enthralled by the disappointing ingredient list on the side of your ice cream, you had missed the tall man now looming at your shoulder. You whipped your head around with a start, taking a step back, smelling menthol and asphalt and nothing good. 

“Thanks,” you quietly replied. 

He waited until you turned back around to continue. “You go to school over here?” 

You kept your gaze forward. “Um, yeah.” 

“Nice. I graduated a few years back. Marketing.” 

“Cool,” you replied. What had compelled you to leave your phone on the couch? This night sucked. 

You found reprieve in the line moving, the employee calling you over to check out. As soon as you paid—a few dollar bills funneled out of your pocket with shaky hands—you booked it. Your ice cream burned in your palm but you didn’t care, feet carrying you out the door and into the dimly lit parking lot. You fisted your keys in your fingers; pointless, you knew, but a small comfort. 

The man’s voice returned with the chime of the bell over the gas station door. “Wait! Wait, I’m Beck. I own a business nearby.” 

You should have kept walking, but one of your fatal flaws was, apparently, people pleasing. You turned to him. He smiled at you but it made your stomach twist. 

“Oh, nice,” you responded, rocking back on your heels. 

“We should connect. Maybe go for coffee or something?” He took a step forward. You fought the urge to take one back. His beard was unkempt and he held a six pack in his white-knuckled grip. 

“Um, I don’t know. I’m pretty busy with finals coming up. Plus, I’m not really in the business field.” 

“Not for business then,” he smiled again, teeth dull in the streetlight. 

Just agree. If you agreed you could block him soon after and everything would be fine. 

You took too long to answer. He took the final step forward to arrive in your space and wrapped his fingers around your bicep. “C’mon, I’m not asking you to marry me or anything.” 

Frozen by fear, you let out a weak laugh. The pint in your hand was sticking to your skin now in a way that would be painful when you tried to let go of it later. Your breath rattled in your chest when you laughed again. 

“Sure, okay.” But he didn’t let go of your arm, instead sliding it down to the bone of your wrist. 

“What about now?” he posed. “You don’t look too busy. I can make you something at my place.” 

He was at least ten years older than you. You attempted to pull yourself from his grasp to no avail. Maybe reasoning would work. 

“My roommate's waiting for me,” you lied. “Could you let go? I sprained my wrist at the gym last week,” you lied again. 

He refused with a shake of his head. You took a panicked glance inside the gas station to your right. No one was looking. 

“Please let go of me.” 

The call of your name from the other side of the parking lot initially sent more unbearable fear down your spine. But then the owner of that voice registered in your brain, and although it had been the cause of your recent internal strife, you couldn't be more grateful to hear it. 

He said your name again, closer now and questioning. Bucky jogged up to the pair of you, saw your wrist and the man holding it hostage, and looked back up at you with confused, wild eyes. 

“You know this guy?” he asked, jutting his thumb out at Beck.

“No,” you whispered. The word was short but the syllable still trembled. 

Bucky didn’t look confused anymore. He looked pissed. “Wanna take your fucking hands off her?”

Beck was tall, but Bucky was taller. And angry. Beck released your wrist and raised his hands in a placating gesture. “Whoa, man, no need for the theatrics. I’m guessing you’re here to stock up for a party? I used to be in Sigma Nu.” 

When Bucky’s silent glare failed to dampen, Beck continued with, “We were just planning a night at my place, right?” 

His nod in your direction made your breath catch. Bucky took his piercing gaze off of Beck and softened it as it fell on you. You wanted to respond, but words were gone. They were impossible. Your ice cream was melting. 

“Yeah, I think we’re done here,” Bucky scoffed, placing his arm around your shoulder. He guided you past the wall of a man, making sure to drive his shoulder into his chest as he went. Beck went to say more, to protest or whine, but Bucky shot him such a scathing look it almost made you wither. 

The smell of coconut and spices and a hint of whisky met your nose, and it was familiar. It was safe. You fumbled with the keys in your hands as your feet guided you wherever Bucky was going, and then you fumbled even more, soft jingling disrupting the softness of footfall. God, why wouldn’t you stop shaking? 

A hand fell atop yours, crunching the keys to a halt. You stared down at them, unsteady breath hitting the tanned fingers that served as your current anchor. 

“Look at me, y/n.” 

You couldn’t. You couldn’t do anything. 

“Sweetheart, eyes up. All you gotta do.” Bucky’s voice was as soft as it was last night. That was the only reason you were able to follow his request. “There she is,” he hummed. 

He removed his arm from your shoulders and shifted in front of you, placing his hand on your cheek. You ignored that it felt the same as it had last night. You ignored that you wanted it to feel the same for him, too. 

“You okay?” he asked, tilting his neck down to better see your face. His thumb brushed under your eye. “He hurt you?” 

You shook your head, whispering no, whispering that you were fine. 

Bucky nodded to himself, eyes tracking down to your toes and then back up again. He must have mistaken your shaking for coldness because the next thing he did was guide you into the car behind him. You didn’t know it was his.

He blasted the heat the second he got in. He had shuffled you into your seat with his hands before that, smoothed your hair down and closed the door after you were settled and not shaking as hard. The heat dried out your eyes. It distracted you enough to let words form. 

“Thank you,” you said. “He wouldn’t leave me alone. I didn’t bring my phone with me. I should’ve.” 

“Of course.” 

There was a beat of silence. The relief you had felt earlier had been muddled down to an awkward pit in your stomach, and you weren’t sure if Bucky felt it too or if he was still riding a testosterone-fueled adrenaline high. 

You wanted to go home now; this was uncomfortable and you had felt Bucky’s lips on yours less than twenty-four hours ago with no closure. He obviously didn’t want to be around you. This was probably a responsibility thing for him. 

“I can… I can walk home now. The guy left. I’m just a quarter mile away and you probably have to stock up or whatever.” 

He looked at you with a pinched expression. “I’m not letting you walk home after that. You kiddin’ me?” 

“I’ll be fine, really. I walk over here all the time.” 

“You get harassed all the time too?” 

“No…” 

“Exactly. So you’re not walking home.” 

“Bucky—” 

“Look I’m not gonna kiss you again, alright? So you don’t have to turn down a ride because of that.” 

Your ice cream was soup at this point. You let it roll into your lap as you clamped your mouth shut just to open it again. Bucky ran a rough hand through his hair before dropping it on the steering wheel, clutching at it with no place to go. 

“I’m not following,” you finally relented. 

A loud sigh released from his nose. “You don’t have to worry about me kissing you again. I just want to make sure you get home safe and then I’ll leave you alone.” 

“Worry about—you’re the one trying to avoid me,” you snapped, frozen fingers pointing to your chest. “You tutor-dumped me.”

“Tutor-dumped? How do you…” he trailed off. 

“I get an email when you make a change request, Bucky.” 

He stared at you for a moment, lips parted and unmoving. He clenched his jaw a moment later, a red tint adorning his cheeks. 

“Well, you—you—look, I know you don’t like me, y/n. You’ve made that clear,” he stuttered, words getting louder as he moved his hands around with each one. “But I like you. I like when you get mad at me and when you yell at me for not listening and when you get all embarrassed when I play with your hair. And I’ve been trying to get you to come to one of my parties since we started this whole thing, but every time I talk about them you seem to like me even less. 

“If I had known insulting you would get your attention, I woulda done that week one,” he exasperated. You sat up in your seat but he continued. “I didn’t mean any of that shit you thought I did. You’re not boring. And I didn’t mean to kiss you, but you looked—well, I already told you.” 

“So you don’t want me to be your tutor anymore because you like me?” You spoke slowly, each word careful. 

“No,” he sighed, frustrated. “I can’t be around you because I kissed you and you didn’t care. Because I’ll want to kiss you all the time and you didn’t even wanna kiss me once. I know we were drunk, I get that, but I’ve wanted that for a long time and I need to move on. It’s nothing against your… tutoring skills. If that’s what you’re worried about” 

“But you talk about hooking up with other girls all the time, Bucky. To me.” 

“You ever hear of lying?”

“Why would you—” 

“You really gonna make me live out all of my failures with you?” 

You’d read so many things wrong. Taken so many things the wrong way. You figured the email earlier was the final nail in the coffin, but this was something else entirely. This was Bucky, sitting next to you in his car looking distressed and frazzled with his hair six different directions, telling you that he’s been trying to get your attention since he met you. That you weren’t small or insignificant or boring. 

It was probably a terrible idea to follow through with your next thought. You’d probably get hurt in the long run. But you did it anyway. 

“I wanted you to kiss me.” Bucky’s head whipped towards you. You bit the inside of your cheek and said, “I want you to kiss me all the time.” 

He whispered your name. It sounded like the air had left every corner of his body. But he didn’t move, and you needed to rectify that. 

“You’re infuriating,” you began. Bucky cringed, but you needed to explain as he had. “You’re like the antithesis of everything I want out of college. You don’t care about classes. You’re always late. You talk too loud in the library.” 

You took a deep breath, fiddling with the loose thread of your pants. You couldn’t make eye contact with anything but the ground. 

“But then you know my coffee order when I’ve never told it to you. You save me from losers in parking lots and make sure I’m not drunk out of my mind at your obscene party. You make me feel… you make me feel stupid sometimes. And I thought it was because you’re everything I’m not, but I really think it’s because you’re everything I told myself I should stay away from. But I don’t want to.

“I wanted you to kiss me at that party and I want you to kiss me now.” 

“Then get over here. I’m not kissing you over some bullshit center console.” 

You twisted to follow his directions, gasping as his hands clasped around your waist to tug you into his lap. It wasn’t seamless—there was laughing and your head briefly connected with the roof of the car—but Bucky’s touch was everywhere, soothing the uncertainty and fear and slight headache. 

His forehead connected with yours when you felt secure in his arms. His fingers slid down from your waist over the material of your sweatpants and when he spoke next you felt the words on your own lips.

“You’re wearing sweatpants. You get so mad when I wear sweatpants.” 

You laughed. “I get mad because it usually means you just rolled out of bed, and you’re usually. late.” 

“I got a secret,” he whispered, nudging his nose against yours. “I’m never late. And I only wear those sweatpants around you. You get cute when you’re pissed at me.” 

“Well, I’m about to be really cute—”

He kissed you. You’d have plenty of time to argue later.

[jj-one]

STRAY KIDS + POSSESSIVENESS ! 🩹 ⋅˚₊ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

this is smut, do not interact if under 18

pairing: dom!skz x sub!fem!reader, established relationship, husband!changbin bc why not ? genre/tags: smut, angst, fluff (tbh it's only changbin's part), jealousy, exhibitionism, voyeurism, lots of degradation, mentions of crying, marking, manhandling, bondage play, piv, unprotected s*x (do not try this at home kids), public s*x, rough s*x, fingering, nipple play, oral (f & m receiving), t*tty slapping, multiple orgasms, edging, choking, bulge kink, slight breeding kink… am not mentally ok for writing any of this words: 3.4k

**old repost from my deleted blog

BANG CHAN. His patience was a level of no other. The man just watched you flirt with his friend and didn’t mutter a single word. All the while you kept boasting about how good Changbin’s muscles looked and the movement of his biceps were leaving you in complete amusement.

Pissed off doesn’t begin to describe what he’s feeling right now. He clears his throat,

“Are we done y/n? I think it’s time we head home now.”

The tone of his voice was cold, icy like a winter storm.

The lump in your throat was stuck. You knew how much in deep shit you were for this and his silence was the main indicator.

You could feel his piercing eyes on you the whole time.

+

It wasn’t long before you’d end up in this position. Both arms were locked above your head by his strong hands. The tight grip he kept around your wrists was definitely going to leave some bruising.

“You’re such a dumb slut. Did all this just to get me like this huh?” His cock hitting your walls aggressively as you spasm and shake under him.

“All this to get me to fuck you the like the dumb little cockwhore you are?” He growled, “can Changbin fuck you like this?”

His pace was relentless. His cock stretching you open with each deep thrust. His harsh words cutting into you like a dagger. Your mind was blank, head full of Chan’s cock. You had to answer him though, or else he will stop.

“N-no Chan only y-yours… only you can fuck me like this!”

A smirk creeps up his face from your quavering voice. He leans forward, his lips brush over yours as if almost to kiss you but doesn’t.

“I own you y/n. Only I get to have to you, understood?”

All you feel is his cock slamming into you. The slapping sounds becoming a melody of a beat, your heart was racing a mile a minute.

“Understood.”

LEE KNOW. He hates when you act out in public. The way you tease him and get him riled up, knowing he can’t do anything about it. It gave you sense of power, you had the upper hand— for now.

You were wearing the shortest mini skirt possible, it barely covered your bum and you could feel a cool breeze slip through your crevices. You kept walking in front of him, swaying your little hips side to side, letting him watch you bend down to pick things up as he sneaks a peak under your skirt. The sight of the pink lace thong you wore was enough to make him grab you by the arm and yank you into a public restroom nearby.

Before you know it, you’re being devoured by your boyfriend. Sitting on the counter of the sink whilst he was below you, giving you a gaze that could snatch your soul. His digits sunk into your dripping cunt as he swipes his tongue across your slit. Your skirt was still on but pushed up slightly, your thong was also moved to the side.

“I can’t believe you’d go out like this and expect me not to control myself.” He rises up momentarily.

“You do this on purpose, knowing I don’t want other people looking at you.”

He laps up your juices and coats it with his face, scissoring you open with his fingers.

“Fuck… I wore this for you Minho— w-wanted to look pretty for you.” Your eyes were tightly shut, feeling the euphoria as you were close to your orgasm.

He abruptly pulled his fingers out of you, thrusting your hips in the air now, you whine for stimulation.

“Will you be a good girlfriend for me and cum on my tongue kitten? I want you to scream as loud for me as you can, I don’t care who hears it.” Minho was dead serious. He doesn’t care you both are in a public restroom and there’s people casually walking by. He wants everyone to know you are his.

You nod and agree to be on your best behavior for him. You know he will most likely reward you for this in the end.

“I promise, I’ll be a good girl Minho.”

Feeling your body heat surge as he inched closer to your core, pressing his tongue at your entrance. He tongue fucks you viciously while never breaking his eye contact with you.

Feeling yourself come undone from the surreal pleasure, all you want is to feel your release.

You thrash and moan as you cream on Minho’s tongue, your legs felt like jello when you climax. You let out multiple gasps for air, feeling as though you just ran a marathon.

Minho hasn’t left between your legs yet, his face still in a headlock. He wasn’t quite finished with you just yet.

“You can give me one more, right kitten?”

CHANGBIN. Being a newlywed couple felt like a fairytale dream come true. He felt incredibly lucky to have you as his wife and doesn’t stop reminding you how happy he is. He’d shower you with a beacon of compliments that would melt your heart each and every time.

You went on another vacation right after the honeymoon and it felt like paradise. That was up until a small incident occurred, it happened when you were at the pool with your husband. One of the pool goers at the resort couldn’t keep their eyes off you. You wore a sexy one piece that had cut-out details on the sides to show off your waist but you wore a sheer cover up over it.

Changbin noticed straight away the eyes that were glued to you, the eyes that were glued to his precious wife. He was livid. Almost causing a scene, he went up to the perverted man that was eye fucking you and gave him a piece of his mind. In utter disbelief of what was unfolding in front of you, you go up to Changbin to calm him down and get him to stop before he ends up actually doing something he’ll regret. His face burned crimson from anger but the sound of your voice brought him back to reality.

+

Things were much better in private now. Much better. Sitting on your husband’s lap in the jacuzzi bathtub felt so relaxing, his hands roamed your naked body as he placed chaste kisses all over you. He stopped at your neck to give it more attention, nibbling on a sensitive spot that made you sink right into his form. Moaning softly whilst his hands prance down to your back.

“I want to shield the rest of the world from you, only I get to gawk at my gorgeous wife.” Changbin says possessively, looking at you once he comes up from your neck.

You nod in agreement, “they can look but can’t touch!”

“No, they can’t even look, all of this is mine, mine, mine.” He plants a kiss to your cheek as his hand creeps down to your core. He prods your hole with a single digit, entering you with ease. You let out a soft moan as you part your lips slightly, bucking your hips forward. He pumps his finger into your wetness as he looks deeply into your eyes, nothing but burning desire in his pupils. He brings his thumb to your clit and rubs it in a steady motion, your swollen nub feeling overstimulated from his touch.

“This is just the beginning my love, I’m not done with you until the sun comes up.” He whispered in your ear as he drags his tongue against your earlobe. In just the jacuzzi alone, he’s made you cum several times from his fingers. Oh how those magical fingers always do wonders on you..

HYUNJIN. The room was pitch black, your vision completely impaired from the blindfold attached to your head. Your hands were bound to each other, behind your back being tied by a thick rope. You had nowhere to go and the room was pure silence, naked and touch starved, you whine for Hyunjin to do something but you were met with no answer. He was standing over you on the bed but you were unaware of any of your surroundings.

The man finally spoke, “This is what happens when you try and make daddy jealous.”

You can feel his hot breath on your neck, the sensation making you crave him even more.

Hyunjin was always the possessive type, was constantly in need of reassurance if he felt his ego was being bruised. This was situation was no different, he needed to remind you that he was the one who owned you.

He brought finger to your perked nipple, gently dragging it across to tease you a bit. A white-hot charge sent through your body as you finally felt his touch. Dripping in a puddle of your own slick from the dirty thoughts racing in your mind, he continues lightly tracing your hardened nipples; eliciting low moans from you.

Your senses were heightened from the way you weren’t able to see anything, any little touch from him making you squeal from shock.

“You like this don’t you?” He says in a condescending tone, he belittles you some more. “So pathetic, look at you. Can’t do anything but take it, so fucking helpless.”

Hyunjin loved seeing how weak you become under him, the power dynamic being completely imbalanced right now. All you could do was moan out for him, practically begging him to do more but you know he’s going to take his time with you.

“Gonna make you squirt all over this bed for me.” He says, “Won’t stop until I have you screaming and begging for mercy, which I will never give you.”

The smirk on his face was devilish, he was conjuring up the perfect plan to ruin you indefinitely.

“Hyunjin, please fuck me… please.” You push your thighs together to feel some friction but Hyunjin gets mad at this action instantly.

He brings a harsh slap to your left tit, making you jump up a bit but your body couldn’t move properly from being tied up. Your legs went back to it’s original position, spread open for him so he can get a glimpse of your dripping cunt.

“Don’t ever tell me what to do, I make the rules now.” He palms your breast and kneads it excessively.

“You are my property.”

HAN. If jealousy was a disease Han would be the first one to catch it. He really loves yet hates the fact that he has such a smoking hot girlfriend that everyone wants. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy dating you but the way some of these other guys would look at you was about to become his villain origin story.

You were so oblivious to anyone who attempted to flirt with you, you only had eyes for your man but it was hard to convince Han otherwise. The pizza delivery guy complimented how pretty you looked and when you handed him the money to pay for the food, you accidentally gave him a ten dollar bill instead of a twenty, he didn’t even care he just smiled and continued talking to you.

That’s when Han knew he had to butt in, he was listening from the couch and he knew he shouldn’t have let you be the one to answer the door. Quickly he comes up to you to wrap his arms behind you, keeping you in a tight hold as the pizza guy looks mortified now.

“You can leave now,” Han says to him in a harsh tone, “We have important business to take care of!”

Slamming the door in his face now, Han comes up from behind you to take the pizza box out of your hands to place it on the table. Soon after, a heavy make out session between you would ensue.

+

As your naked bodies entangled one another, you feel yourself cinching around his cock from each inch as he slides it in. Your breath instantly coming to a halt as the end of his cock crashed into your cervix. He moves with his ass up in the air as he buries his length deep inside you, the squelching sound of your wet pussy making him see stars.

“Fuck… so fucking tight for me.” Han says sounding pussydrunk off the way you feel around him.

You fall into a frenzy as he pumps his length into you harder, pounding into you like no tomorrow. The bulge of his cock could be seen inside you, moving in and out of you intensely. Grinding your hips to match his pace, you rub your clit to feel more stimulation.

“You’re so fucking hot my God…” He cooed, tiny beads of sweat now forming on the sides of his face. “Your pussy was made for me and me only…”

“Only I can make you feel this good.”

FELIX. He felt sick to his stomach whenever he saw someone else looking at you. The way people would look at you in public when he was with you made him feel beyond disrespected. This is exactly why he doesn’t bring you anywhere because his fragile little ego will be crushed as soon as another person laid their eyes on you. He couldn’t deal with it anymore, he just had to do something about it.

You were at a public park but the park was so big that it was easy to hide and go unseen behind some bushes.

Felix brought you to a secluded area and told you get on your back, you do as he says and he looks at you with the most evil grin on his face.

“I’m going to fuck you so dumb right here, right now.” Felix says in a raspy deep voice, “I will let everyone exactly know who’s bitch you are.”

You gulp once you feel his hands all over you, you wore a black slip dress which drove him absolutely mad.

“Gonna make you pay for getting me worked up like this.” You felt so small when he spoke like this to you, the sticky mess in your panties was only growing as you feel his hands go up your thigh.

“Too stunned to speak sweetheart?” He asks, giving you an alluring yet mischievous smile. You have no idea what this man has for you in store.

“N-no, I can speak-“

“Shut up.” He quickly cuts you off from saying more. “I’m the one talking right now, you sit back and take what I’m going to give you.”

You did exactly as you were told and lay back for him. He quickly unzips his pants and frees his cock from his boxers. You look at the red tip of his angry cock, the sight of his raging erection was enough to make you feel a tingling sensation in your heat. His cock would plunge into you nice and slow but once he bottoms out he’ll quickly pick up his pace, fucking into you menacingly. He brought a hand to your neck and squeezed the shaft of it tightly, you gasp for air as he choked you but it wasn’t unbearable. You close your eyes to the feeling, letting yourself be fully immersed into him. Each thrust he gave you felt like bliss as he roughly held onto your hip, fucking you like a complete maniac.

“Gonna dump all my cum into your slutty little body,” Felix continued,“you’re my fuck toy, only I get to use you.”

SEUNGMIN. Usually something like this would never get to him. However, today was different, very different. Seungmin almost went ballistic when he found out that some guy asked for your number while you were out shopping at the supermarket. He often goes everywhere with you but you were getting off work and went straight to the store to grab some things for dinner. That’s when it happened and you told Seungmin as soon as you got home. You thought he’d just laugh it off but he frowned, disproving of that guy’s actions.

“What a loser,” Seungmin says in an annoyed tone, “when they will learn to just leave you the hell alone?”

He wanted you all to himself, if he could lock you up forever and throw away the key, he probably would. Only letting you out when he tells you you can.

“They can try all they want Minnie but I know I belong to you at the end of the day.” You bring your arms around his neck and lean in to kiss him and he kisses you back passionately.

+

“Want you to say it for me again, who’s pussy does this belong to?” Seungmin was now relentlessly pumping two fingers in you.

“Y-yours Seungmin… yours!” You could barely get a coherent word out of your mouth.

“And who makes you feel the best?”

He wasn’t letting up on making sure you know that you fully belonged to him. “We can do this all day princess… I’m not going to stop until I’m satisfied.”

This was his fifth time edging you at this point, leaving you on the verge of an orgasm but would pull his fingers out once he notices your chest floating up. He’s being so evil to you right now, as if you it was your fault for what had happened in the supermarket.

“You, only y-you! You’re the best at making me feel so good!” You babble as he rapidly moves his fingers in and out of your gaping hole.

“That’s my good little girl, now keep taking my fingers and I’ll reward you soon okay?”

JEONGIN. “You’re such a filthy slut, you know that?” The motion of needy hips were bucking into you. Your head was kept in place, completely still, on your knees and on the verge of tears from your boyfriend’s words.

You knew why you were in this predicament right now. This was all your fault and you did it all for this exact reason.

You wanted to see Jeongin’s reaction to saying you think Felix was hot. You know he wouldn’t take that comment lightly since that was one of his best friends. You wanted to see how far you could test his limits.

“You wanna fuck my friends huh?” He grabs you by the hair and furrows his eyebrows to regain more focus onto you.

You couldn’t speak, all you could do was shake your head around him as he shoved his cock further down your throat.

“Can’t even talk with your mouth full of cock, what a dumb little whore you are.”

His cock hitting the back of your uvula, causing you to make a gagging noise. Streaks of saliva creep from the sides your mouth, the messy scenery underneath him was a heavenly sight indeed. You moan while sucking his cock, the vibrations making the hairs on the back of his neck rise up. He throws his head back and keeps a tight hold on your hair, gripping you with everything he had. He thrusts his hard length into you viciously, the gurgling noises you were making whilst he fucks your face sounds harmonic to him.

“Shit…think I’m gonna cum soon” he muttered, letting out a groan as he kept pushing your face into his cock. “Yeah… just like that fuck… that’s it.”

A stream of tears came running down your face as you continued. You can feel his veiny cock twitch against your tongue as you felt hot spurts of cum fill you up now. You swallow each and every drop and milk him clean like the good girl you were. Opening your mouth wide to show it was empty he grins viciously and taps his dick against your tongue.

“You’re the biggest fucking slut…” He pants heavily.

“My biggest slut.”

[angstywaifu]

Praise - Bodhi Durran

Part 2 to Shower Masturbation after many requests.

Summary: After ignoring Bodhi since the incident, he finally corners you to talk to you to talk about what happened. Warnings: 18+, smut, NSFW, praise and pet names, unprotected sex, female reader Kinktober MasterList

I’d somehow managed to avoid Bodhi since the incident. I’d practically begged Brennan to put me on other patrols and tasks nowhere near Bodhi. And luckily he had agreed without any questions. But I knew the others had noticed. Was hard not to when I’d suddenly started avoiding most of my friend group. Multiple times Xaden and Garrick had tried to corner me, but each time I’d escaped. And tonight I’d been lucky my group had returned late from a scouting mission. Meaning everyone would be asleep, and I could let my guard down on my way back to my room for some much needed sleep.

A stupid mistake I come to realise as I round the corner and collide with something solid, a hand muffling the yelp that escapes my lips from the shock. I push the hand away from my mouth, eyes going wide when I note the woven leather bracelet on the wrist. A leather bracelet I knew all to well because I had made it myself. A gift. A gift I had given to Bodhi.

I look up at meet his eyes, the usual softness to his features gone as he looks down at me. It’s easy to tell he’s not pleased with me. But I can also see how worried he is. A hint of nervousness in his eyes. I still wasn’t ready to face what happened that day, despite the fact I’d laid in bed multiple times thinking about it. Thinking about how my name had fallen from his lips, the way the water had run down his chest and back, and the way his gaze had pinned me down as he finished.

I lower my gaze as I go to push past him, but his hand flys out and grasps my arm, pulling me back. “No, you’re not going anywhere till we talk sweetheart.”

I feel my cheeks flush as my heart rate picks up at the use of the petname. Something Bodhi has never done before. And I hated to admit how much I liked it. And something tells me he notices as he smirks slightly at me. Too stunned to say anything, Bodhi steers us over to the closest door which he opens to reveal one of the rooms they had turned into a classroom

”There’s nothing to talk about.” I say as I lean up against one of the tables, crossing my arms over my chest as Bodhi closes the door behind us.

Bodhi cocks an eyebrow at me as he turns to face me. “Nothing? If it’s nothing then why are you avoiding my like the plague?” I avert my gaze, but he steps forward and grasps my chin between his fingers as he forces my gaze back to him. “Talk to me.”

”It’s not awkward for you after I walked in on you? We’re friends and I stood there and….” I shut my eyes, not able to look at Bodhi.

”Look at me. Please.” He asks, his voice almost pleading. I shake my head in his grasp, an aggrivated sigh escaping his lips. ”You’re right. Friends probably shouldn’t have stood there and watched. But you did.”

I wince at his words, I didn’t need the reminder of what I did. How I’d stood there and watched as my best friend had come undone with my name falling from their lips. Too lost in my own thoughts, I startle as Bodhi’s breath skims the back of my neck.

”And friend’s shouldn’t moan out the others name. But I did.” He whispers, causing a shiver to run down my spine. “So how about we finally admit how we really feel and see where the other day could have ended up if you didn’t run away from me.”

My eyes fly open at his words, my head whipping around to stare at Bodhi who has his hands braced on the table behind me as he looks at me. I hadn’t noticed till now he was only wearing boots paired with loose linen pants and a casual black shirt that looked better than it should on him. He’s looking at me like he wants to devour me. As if he’s craving me. It’s then I notice how tightly he’s gripping the table, his knuckles almost white against his darker skin. Was he holding himself back?

All I can do is stare at Bodhi with my mouth hanging open, unsure of how to respond. Unsure what words to form. So I respond in the only way I know I can right now. I push up onto the table, turning around so I’m kneeling in front of him and grasp the front of his shirt as I press my lips against his. Bodhi responds immediately as he grasps my legs, yanking them so I’m sitting on the edge of the desk with one leg either side of him as he grips them tightly.

Bodhi, sweet and caring Bodhi who I always thought would be soft and tender in a moment like this was nothing like that. The kiss full of passion as his hands grip onto me tighter, his tongue fighting for dominance which I easily give into as I tug on his shirt. Getting the hint Bodhi removes his lips from mine as he grips the bottom of the shirt.

I thought Bodhi naked in the shower masturbating was hot, but watching as he removes his shirt is somehow a thousand times better. The moonlight coming through the windows highlighting the toned ridges of his body that I can’t help but reach out and run my fingers over, watching as his muscles tense at my touch.

His hands are then on me, pushing my jacket from my shoulders, undoing the laces of my boots, and pulling at the rest of my clothes. As my underwear hits the floor, Bodhi just stands there and takes me in. His eyes roaming up and down my Bodhi as he smiles at me.

He reaches his hand out to me, “Come here sweetheart.”

I reach out and shakily take his hand, his fingers closing around mine as he pulls me from the table. He pulls a chair out from the table behind him, swinging it around before lowering himself onto it. He pulls me forward guiding my legs either side of his before grasping my hips and pulling me down to straddle him.

As soon as I’m seated he brings his lips to my neck, soft gasps falling from my lips as he kisses slowly down my neck. I grasp onto his curly black hair as I quiver at his touch. His kisses sending shivers down my spine while also setting my skin on fire. My hips grind down on him, his length twitching beneath me as I graze of the tip.

”So needy for me sweetheart.” He coos into my neck as he places more kisses, his hands caressing my thighs. “What do you need?”

”Y-you. I need you Bodhi. I need you so badly.” I moan out as I grind up against him again.

”And yet you ran that day.” I can practically here the smirk in his voice.

”I-I was just scared. C-caught of guard.” I stutter as one of his fingers grazes against my entrance. “I should have stayed. I want you Bodhi. I’m sorry.”

”It’s ok sweetheart.” He assures me as his other hand caresses my cheek as he leans my forehead against his. “Let me take care of you.”

”Fuck!” I cry out as he lines himself up and pushes into me.

I knew he was on the bigger end after watching him in the shower that day, but it did nothing to prepare me for the feeling of him stretching me so damn well. I hear him suck in a sharp breath as we pushes in slowly. My fingers tightening in his hair as we slowly let me adjust. After a few moments I feel Bodhi bottom out as he seats me fully onto him again.

I plant my feet on the floor and slowly start to thrust up and down on him, Bodhi’s hands gripping me tightly as he helps me rise and fall onto him. Which I soon become grateful for when each thrust hits the perfect spot, quickly bringing me to a mumbling mess as his name falls from my lips.

”That’s it sweetheart, you’re doing so well.” He assures me as he smiles up at me. “Taking me so well just like I knew you would.”

I bite my bottom lip as I nod at him, unable to form anything but his name and moans as I feel the familiar feeling building. My rhythm faltering as my legs start to tire from the motion. But Bodhi is quick to notice, his hands grasping my thighs as he stands, walking us back to the table where we started. Laying me down gently on the surface.

”You’re close aren’t you sweetheart?” He asks as he starts thrusting in and out slowly.

”Y-yes, so close.” I mumble out as I grip on to his arms either side of me.

”Well go on then, be a good girl and come for me.” He says with smirk before he stands upright, grabbing my things as he lays my legs against his torso, before resting my ankles on his shoulders.

I gasp out at the new angle and pace Bodhi sets. I thought the chair was good, but gods was this amazing. I struggle to keep my eyes open as they threaten to roll back into my head. The sound of skin on skin fills the room with our moans as Bodhi slams into me again and again. My nails dragging on the surface of the table as I try to find something to grasp onto to anchor myself.

Bodhi reaches behind me and raises my hips, the new angle tipping me over as I cry out his name. I feel Bodhi’s thrusts falter but before I vaguely register him crying out as well, both of us riding out our highs together. After a moment Bodhi scoops me up into his arms, cradling me against his chest as we settle back into the chair. His hands rubbing up and down my back and arms as we catch our breath.

He presses his lips into my hair before resting his head on mine while I trail my hand over his chest. “Regretting running off that day now?” He teases, causing me to reach out and playfully slap his chest.

”Don’t make me go back to ignoring you.” I warn, his arms tightening around me in response.

”You’re not going anywhere.”

@violent-little-thing @softodettes @marrianena @idkimjusthere100 @strangeeaglepost @puttyly @kyl13sm1l3y @wildflowermooon @oliviajm21 @azrielsshadows42 @paintedbyshadows

[ivysangel]

imagine the sexual tension between you and college au!jason and y’all finally take care of it during a one-night stand at some random ass party and the TENSION ONLY GETS WORSE ⁉️ like first y’all were ignoring how bad y’all wanted to fuck each other and NOW you have to act like he wasn’t just devouring your pussy a few nights ago

-🦦

tutor!jason who your teacher sets you up to study with twice a week since he's acing the class. the first time you meet, it's in the library, and you almost sit down next to a different guy because jason doesn't look at all like the type to know the ins and outs of gothic lit. if he wasn't nose-deep in mary shelley's frankenstein you would've assumed he was a jock doing recon and looking for some pussy.

but he's not; he's actually really kind and smart and also really fucking hot. your tutoring sessions go on longer than scheduled because you spend more time staring at him than you should. you're actually kind of embarrassed about it until you catch him staring at you one day with a familiar look, one you'd given him many, many times when he wasn't looking.

from then on, things are pretty tense between you two, not in an angry kind of way, but more of an unprecedented level of horniness kind of way. and the growth of your friendship is temporarily stunted because of how badly you want to fuck each other.

but it all comes to a head at some dumb frat party. you're a little buzzed but still lucid enough to know that jason's out of place in this environment. he hates frats, hates the culture around it, hates the fact that he gets mistaken for one so often.

so why the fuck is he flirting with some random sorority girl who's trying way too hard to keep his attention. you're thinking to yourself, "he's not gonna fuck you." but you're not actually 100% sure about that, so you find your way over to him just in case.

his attention immediately shifts to you and little miss greek row makes herself sparse when she realizes his eyes are locked on you and only you.

you're making conversation, but it's kind of awkward; you were clearly green with envy over the prospect of him fucking someone else despite having no claim to him or his dick, and now you were just hitting him with a "sooooo fancy seeing you here!" and he's just looking at you; peering down at you with this look in his eyes that just so dark. unlike anything you've seen on his face before. and then he's finishing off his drink and asking if you want to go somewhere quieter.

ok, so boom. he's leading you up the stairs and into an empty room, and if either of you were sober or not blinded by an intense need to fuck the other, you probably wouldn't have hooked up on some frat guy's unwashed sheets.

and using "hook up" is generous because you're the only one that got anything out of it. he was pretty much hiking your dress up to eat you out before the door was fully closed, and he continued to stay there, between your legs, with his mouth sucking on your clit until someone knocked on the door and killed the vibe. #jasontoddcertifiedmunch

you thought the tension before was bad, but it gets so much worse. you start skipping your tutoring sessions, and the few you do show up to end early because you can barely look at him. you can't get the image of him licking his lips after eating you out out of your head, and it was beginning to drive you insane. 

he was also going insane, but for a different reason. while you were scared that it ruined your friendship, he was craving you more and more with each passing day, wondering where you'd be if you'd gone all the way. he was on the verge of knocking out the teeth of the asshole that interrupted you and shooting you a "u up?" text in the middle of the night.