#these are supposed to be in charles’ pov and how he felt in the moment for some of them | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

fangirl-dot-com · 10 months ago

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Chapter 16 - Chéri

Aha, so I went a different route this time and the POVs are all over the place! But I enjoyed how this one turned out. Hit me in all the feels. just a bit angsty but nothing too terrible!

I hope you all enjoy this chapter! much love from me

Like always comments, questions, concerns, reblogs, and likes are always appreciated!

TAG LIST IS CLOSED

Arthur hated the rain.

Sure, you seemed happy when you danced with P and splashed in the puddles as you waited for the signal for you to get in your car. The smile on your face should have been enough to damper his bad feelings.

But it was raining. And it was Suzuka.

He felt heavy as he got ready earlier that morning. The sad smile on Charles’s face hadn’t helped either. They both felt it when their feet touched the asphalt. They felt it as they held onto each other for a little longer than usual before Charles got dressed.

He tried to take deep breaths before the cameras turned on as he was supposed to help Jensen and Nico with the interviews today. Both ex-drivers seemed to understand the weight that this track had on the younger Monegasque, so they covered the heavier questions.

Arthur could only be glad that he was technically supporting you today. The navy polo felt itchy on his skin. Sure, he missed the red polo with the yellow symbol, but navy was your color. It helped him feel closer to you, when you were kilometers away in your car.

He could tell people wanted to ask. He knew they were itching to just say, “How does it feel to be back on the circuit that killed your godfather.” But, they’d never ask, they would just send sad smiles that didn’t quite reach anyone’s eyes.

Even you, his smiley best friend, could tell something was off.

Arthur’s hands itched more than the skin under the polo. He would never be able to explain the sensation, but they itched. Maybe he should hold a cold can of Red Bull to cool the burn, but that wouldn’t help.

His eyes were strained as he watched the data computer in front of him. He checked and checked again.

Your tires would be fine. There’d be no stray cranes or tractors. The car was safe.

Well, that’s what everyone told him and Charles 9 years ago.

You scared him when you put a hand on his shoulder.

“Jumpy today?” you questioned. You were already in your thick race suit, a helmet was in your hands. It wasn’t anything special, just your plain navy and gold one. You had already showed him your special one for Miami.

He shrugged, not knowing how to answer. “A bit.”

A sad smile formed on your face. Right now, he didn’t need words. He just needed you and Charles to be safe, and not be in the car this weekend.

He finally sighed and turned to face you as he took your helmet in your hands. For a moment, he thought about smashing the damn thing, since he knew you didn’t have a backup. But what would be the point.

He placed the lid on your head, keeping it above your forehead. “Starting pole today?”

Now your smile was genuine. “Yep! Thur, I have a chance to win this!”

He tried to mirror the smile, but again, it didn’t reach his eyes. Normally, he’d wait to kiss the “forehead” of you helmet, but today he needed a little something extra.

Your eyes closed as he leaned in and placed a kiss on your head, almost between your eyes. You placed your hands on top of his, where they were still holding your helmet as a mushroom hat.

You whispered, “Are you ok?”

Arthur backed up just a bit. “Like you said, a bit jumpy.”

Looking back, you knew you should have listened to the warning bells that were going off in your head. Arthur was rarely jumpy.

And he loved the rain.

You stepped closer and gave him a hug. Tears might have pooled at his lash line, but he’d never admit to it. He squeezed just a bit tighter before letting you go, so you could get into your car.

Another hand was placed on his shoulder. His eyes met the figure of Kelly, who was holding P. Her eyes, he thinks, were trying to tell him that you’d be alright. That Charles would be alright. And that nothing would go wrong.

How wrong she was.

Starting Grid:

Y/n L/n

Max Verstappen

Charles Leclerc

Fernando Alonso

Carlos Sainz

Lewis Hamilton

Lando Norris

Lance Stroll

Oscar Piastri

George Russell

Alex Albon

Pierre Gasly

Logan Sargeant

Esteban Ocon

Yuki Tsunoda

Daniel Ricciardo

Nico Hulkenberg

Valtteri Bottas

Zhou Guanyu

Kevin Magnussen

“And it’s lights out and away we go for the Japanese Grand Prix. Y/n L/n gets a good start down the first straight with her teammate Max Verstappen right behind her. Charles Leclerc goes wide, trying to gain the position around Verstappen, as the Dutchman is still trying to get the jump ahead on his rookie teammate and does he have it on the first turn?

“No he does not! Y/n L/n leads the Japanese Grand Prix!”

Was it normal if his heart was racing just as fast as these cars were? Well, for some fans it would be due to excitement. And, deep down, Arthur was very excited. You were doing everything that you ever dreamed of doing.

You’d make 5-year-old Y/n proud.

“Looks like the rain is drying up a bit. We’ll see who gets called into the pits first, and it looks like our race leader has been called in to switch. Now, she started on the intermediates and looks like she’ll be going to the hards. Weird call, but so far this season she has been on the bad end of tyre degradation. So we’ll see if she’ll be able to keep her lead with the hards.

“Seems as though she has started a train of pit stops and still comes out in P1.”

Your car was cruising. Yes, your heart was racing, maybe going as fast as your RB20. And it was due to excitement. You were leading, with a comfortable gap. Right now, you couldn’t see anything in your mirrors.

You pressed your radio.

“Mitch, what is the gap? And will I be able to take a win or do I need to let Max by?” you questioned. You were hoping that it’d be the first instance. Your maiden race win on your fourth Formula 1 race. What a start that would be.

Mitch finally answered. “Just talked to Christian. If Max is able to catch you, then you’d need to let him by. But, right now your pace is the same if not faster than his. So, kid, I’d suggest you keep making qualifying laps and you might be a race winner today.”

“Copy.”

Your car jerked around a corner as you continued to press.

You were hungry, starving even, for that win. You’d show everyone who doubted you that you were capable of winning.

Yet, around the spoon corner of turn 13 and 14, the RB20 slid a bit more than you intended to.

Your finger flew to the radio button. “Uh, Mitch what was that?”

Her response was immediate. “Your breaks are a bit hot. I know I told you to push, but please slow down on the turns.”

“Got it. And who is the car in front of me? Did someone get around or?”

“That’s Ocon. He dropped down after he pitted and will be a lapped car in about a lap or so.”

Arthur listened from the pits as Mitch gave you some advice. The first time he saw your car jerk a bit too much, he swore he died right there. He was thankfully given a pair of headphones so that he could listen in on whatever you said. They were uncomfortable, but he’d do anything right now to be closer to you.

He watched as you got closer and closer to the Alpine. If you got around it, you’d be home free with almost 10 laps to go.

Your first win. He could almost taste it for you, and he wasn’t even hungry for a victory. And maybe after your win, it’d be a good time for a confession.

But he had hope that things wouldn’t end like that.

You’d get a win and he’d get the one thing he’s wanted ever since you scared him at the first meeting.

“Mitch, he’s braking hard on the turns. Can you please let the stewards know? He’s going to be a lapped car but is defending like he’s in first place.”

One of the Red Bull engineers immediately got on it.

“Mitch?”

Was Arthur hearing things, or did you sound panicked?

“Yeah Kid? We’re on it about the breaking.”

“He’s not letting me by! And my breaks are acting weird again.”

You sounded panicked. Mitch pressed a couple of buttons as Arthur started to nibble on his fingers.

“Mitch! My breaks.”

“Kid, they’re overheating. You need to slow down.”

“Mitch I need to get around him. Seven more laps left.”

“Kid, I know that, but we don’t need you spinning out.”

Arthur’s hands began to burn as the itch got worse.

“He’s going deep. I can go around.”

“Kid, it’s too risky. Just wait until he’s given a penalty.”

“I can do it! I’ll be a race winner!”

“Kid, hold on!”

“I got it!”

Arthur’s heart stopped racing.

“Kid!”

“L/n tries to go around the outside of Ocon and…”

Oh.

The sound was silent and deafening at the same time.

A ringing sound echoed in his ears as he watched your car flip and flip and flip.

Asphalt. Sky. Asphalt. Sky. Asphalt. Sky. Grass. Sky. Grass. Sky. Grass. Sky. Barrier.

Black.

The garage was in chaos, but somehow everything was going in slow motion? Arthur just stood still as everyone raced around.

“That is the Red Bull of Y/n L/n that has gone into the barriers. It seems to be wedged upside down and stuck. Do we have any answer from inside the car?”

Mitch frantically held down the radio button.

“Kid answer me? Kid? Come on. This isn’t funny.”

Arthur just stood still.

Next to Mitch, GP was on the radio with Max.

The Dutchman passed the accident site first.

“Ah, was that Ocon? Serves him right for last week. Gap to Y/n please?”

“Uh. That is a red flag Max,” GP sighed, “please come back to the pits.”

“Fine. Tell the kid that we can drink a juice box or something.”

“Just come in.”

The rest of the drivers got similar radio messages.

“Be careful. Red flag, there’s a Red Bull in the barriers Charles.”

Charles’s heart dropped but he covered it with a chuckle, blissfully unaware. “Max finally made a mistake?”

There was no answer from Xavi.

“Red flag, return to the pits Lando.”

“To the pits please Lewis, there’s a red flag.”

“George, come in. Red flag is out and you need to get to the pits.”

“Ah, Daniel, red flag. Back to the pits please.”

“Oscar, please come to the pits. There’s been an accident and it’s a red flag.”

“Logan? Pits please, the red flag is out.”

“Arthur!”

The yell of his name brought him out of his stupor. His eyes met Mitch’s brown ones, where she was beckoning him over. He took the itchy headphones off and all but sprinted over to the pit wall. Immediately, Mitch put her own headphones on his head.

“Talk to her. Get her talking.”

It was a command that Arthur would take to heart.

“Y/n?” Damn it, voice crack. “Y/n, please let me know you’re ok?”

“It seems as though Arthur Leclerc is trying to get L/n to respond. Is there still nothing? The marshals are over there, and are trying, but she’s not out of the car yet?”

Max looked around for your matching Red Bull. Two juice boxes were in his hands as he looked for your helmet. Had you gone for another lap on accident? He turned to the red-clad Monegasque who was weirdly frozen next to him.

“Hey Charles, where’s Y/n…”

The juice boxes fell to the ground as Max’s attention was now on the big screen that was broadcasting the wreck site.

Next to him, Charles’s eyes were welling up with tears. His head swerved as he tried to find his brother. Curse him for wearing the dark polo.

“Hey, Charlie?”

A voice called for him through the fog, but his brain was hyper-active. Two hands were placed on his shoulders and blue eyes blocked the big screen.

“She has a halo. Right now, they’re trying to get her out, ok?” Max tried to comfort the Ferrari driver, but was having some issues not crying as well.

Charles mindlessly nodded. Pierre had come by a few moments later and brought him into a hug. It was then he let the tears fall along with his knees as he dropped to the asphalt.

Max whispered as tears began to fall. “Come on kid. Just answer please.” His hands were tucked under his face, almost as if he were in prayer.

Lando and Oscar held on to each other, trying to offer some comfort. Daniel stood behind them, hands at his sides.

In his mind, he only thought, “Was he going to lose another friend to this track?”

Charles was still on the ground, being comforted by Pierre as he rocked back and forth. “No, no, no. This cannot be happening again. Pas encore, pas elle. J’ai perdu Jules, je ne peux pas la perdre, Arthur ne peut pas la perdre. S’il te plait, s’il te plait, s’il te plait.” (Not again, no her. I’ve lost Jules, I can’t lose her, Arthur can’t lose her. Please, please, please.”)

Logan sat numbly on the ground a little ways away. He had gone to get his headphones first thing to block everything out. He would laugh if he could at the next song that played through the speakers, but didn’t. Life is a Highway wouldn’t have the same meaning after today.

Alex was on the phone with Lily, trying to update his girlfriend. You weren’t close with Alex yet, but he saw how well you treated his teammate.

Lewis and George were couped up in the Mercedes garage. Lewis had refused to turn around and look at the big screen. Ten years hadn’t even passed since it last took a life and Lewis wasn’t about to see them drag your body from under the wreckage. George was trying to cope. Sunglasses were on to hide his tears and red eyes.

At this moment, they were all prepared for what was to come: your body draped with a white blanket.

Arthur was still trying. In this moment, it was just you and him. You were alive, you had to be.

“Y/n? Please answer me? I-I can’t lose you. Ok? Can’t lose you like Jules. S’il te plait, tu dois aller bien. Nous avons encore tellement de choses a faire. Tu as besoin d’une victoire, et je te dire ce je ressens. Chéri…” (Please, you have to be ok. We still have so much to do. You need a race win, and I need to tell you how I feel.”)

A crackling noise came over the radio, right as he was about to give up. His breath hitched.

“Y/n?”

“Heeyyyyy,” you voice sounded. A sob escaped from Arthur’s lips.

His hands didn’t itch anymore.

“You are an idiot.”

A groan left your mouth. “I know. Shit, I’m stuck.”

Mitch, who now had another headphone set on her head, started to talk. “Ok kid. The RB20 was designed for this. You just have to keep kicking the side.”

You sighed. “Ok.”

You managed to scrunch yourself in the cockpit and began to kick. That was the moment that Arthur ran back to the garage.

“She’s awake and answering!”

Cheers filled the air while Christian crouched down.

“Thank God,” he whispered, before standing back up and walking out to the pit lane.

Kelly was the one to grab Arthur’s shoulder. “Come, I can drive you to the hospital. She’ll need us.”

With a nod of his head, Arthur grabbed your bag and off he, P, and Kelly went. Vito quickly followed after them, hands full of your documentations and everything you'd need.

On the pit lane, Max watched as the wall of your RB20 suddenly flew away from the car.

“Charles,” he barely whispered, but the Monegasque heard him somehow and stood up swiftly. A hand grasped his shoulder, and he whipped around to find Christian.

“She’s ok.”

By now, everyone’s eyes were trained on the car. Marshals swarmed around it, ready for anything. What they didn’t expect though, was for one leg to swing out and then another. By the time they got over their shock, you were already halfway out. They quickly kneeled to help you further.

“She is out of the car and looks completely fine! She will have to be taken to the hospital. Our calculations are showing that when she stopped, she experienced 54 g-forces. We don’t know if the race will be continued for the remaining 7 laps, but we will keep you updated.”

Your feet squished the grass as you limped toward the on-site ambulance. You looked around and saw multiple cameras, watching your every move. You were thankful for some of the marshals who tried to push them away. But, in the back of your mind, you knew you needed to let everyone know you were fine.

So, with a probably sprained ankle, you started to lightly bounce and raise your hands and wave. A few laughs were let out by the people around you. You pressed a finger toward you heart and then lifted it to the sky.

Charles knew exactly what you were doing. He finally lifted himself off the ground, with Pierre’s help, and did the same motion.

Thank you Jules.

Max was back in the garage, now getting ready for the last few laps. He was angry. Honestly, they should just let everyone go, but a race is a race and it’s not completed.

Mitch and GP came over.

“Kelly went with Arthur and P to the hospital. She says that she’ll keep us updated,” GP told him.

Mitch sucked in a breath. “We’ll let you know how she is after the race. And Max?”

He turned to your engineer.

“Win for her. Ok?” Tears lined her eyes.

Max nodded, wanting to win for you.

He put his helmet on and stalked toward his car.

“And Max?” This time it was Christian, who had jogged up next to him. Max turned his head, full attention on his team principal.

“Give Ocon hell for us.”

Max turned back toward his car, eyes quickly darting to the alpine vehicle.

Oh, he would.

Race Results:

Max Verstappen +25

Charles Leclerc +18

Lando Norris +15

Oscar Piastri +12

Carlos Sainz +11

Lewis Hamilton +8

George Russell +6

Daniel Ricciardo +4

Alex Albon +2

Fernando Alonso +1

Logan Sargeant +0

Yuki Tsunoda +0

Pierre Gasly +0

Valtteri Bottas +0

Lance Stroll +0

Kevin Magnussen +0

Nico Hulkenberg +0

Zhou Guanyu +0

Esteban Ocon +0

Y/n L/n – DNF

Standings after Suzuka

Max Verstappen – 100 points

Charles Leclerc – 66 points

Lando Norris – 42 points

Y/n L/n – 41 points

Lewis Hamilton – 32 points

Oscar Piastri – 31 points

Carlos Sainz – 28 points

Fernando Alonso – 23 points

Daniel Ricciardo – 21 points

George Russell – 20 points

Alex Albon – 4 points

Logan Sargeant – 0 points

Lance Stroll – 0 points

Pierre Gasly – 0 points

Yuki Tsunoda – 0 points

Zhou Guanyu – 0 points

Kevin Magnussen – 0 points

Nico Hulkenberg – 0 points

Valtteri Bottas – 0 points

Esteban Ocon - 0 points

Constructors Standings after Suzuka

Red Bull – 214 points

Ferrari – 139 points

McLaren – 105 points

Mercedes – 87 points

Racing Bulls – 36 points

Aston Martin – 26 points

Williams – 4 points

Alpha Romeo – 0 points

Haas – 0 points

Alpine – 0 points

f1 has posted *pretend there are no cars in the back of the second photo*

f1 Y/n L/n is out of the Japanese Grand Prix following a nasty impact! Mechanics who looked at her car found a faulty brake pad that caused an intense lock up on turn 15. The Red Bull rookie would have experienced around 54 G's when her car finally stopped at the barrier. L/n was escorted to the local hospital and was later released today.

liked by y/n_nation, maxiel_lover, iamred_iamyellow, and 94,873 others

y/n_updates I am so thankful that she's ok now, my heart stopped for a few minutes until she got out

y/nxarthur Arthur's and Charles's faces as they were waiting for her to get out, I was sobbing

leclerc4ever well, considering they lost their godfather at this exact circuit almost ten years ago, I felt their pain through the screen thur_thur exactly, Arthur's cries over the radio will haunt me for the rest of my life

box_box_express does anyone know who went with her? obviously the drivers had to finish the race

y/n_nation some sources say that Arthur and Kelly went with her as well as her manager Vito box_box_official thank you!

rb_rookie Red Bull finally released a statement that they will be looking into the faulty part, because apparently Max was also having the same issue

y/n_lover glad our girl is ok, but did anyone see how mad Max was? she locked up because she was breaking too hard behind Ocon. He needs to be stopped because this is Y/n's second impact and its all because of him

f1_fanatic ikr, and he was about to be a lapped car too!

b0x_b0x_nightmare she flipped almost 10 times, she could have died - Jules was definitely keeping her safe (thank you halo)

y/n_marry_me AND THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HER FIRST WIN TOO GRRRRRRRR

f1_gossip has posted

f1_gossip looks like Mad Max is BACK. The dutch driver was seen yelling at Alpine driver Esteban Ocon after the race. Some sources say he was needed to be held back and Ocon had to be escorted back to his own garage. Max also barely responded to any of the post-race media interviews and immediately left after he was done.

tagged: maxverstappen1

liked by max_max_super, f1_fanatic, y/n_on_TOP, and 24,028 others

f1-fan BAHAHAHA I was laughing my ass off when Max was yelling at Ocon because he deserved it

max_max the return of Mad Max (although I wish it was under different circumstances, I feel so bad for Y/n)

lestappenlove I also saw Charles join in on the yelling as well

max&kid well deserved for Ocon. Seriously though, he needs to have like a penalty or something

y/n_fanclub is it bad that I wished Max would have punched him?

max_is_da_best nope, because I think we all wanted that to happen

leclercxverstappen I know for sure that if Arthur was there, he would have gone off too, you don't mess with Y/n and expect to walk away unhurt

max33 he was FUMING

y/n.89 has posted

y/n.89 everything hurts but pookie made it better with Macas, Cars 2, and the Porsche 911 Lego set - I'll be back, that top step is MINE

tagged: arthur_leclerc

liked by ollibearman, lewishamilton, danielricciardo, y/n_updates and 73,911 others

y/n_nation so happy for the update! we're all so glad that you're ok!

oscarpiastri mad that he got a picture and not me, I was literally also there

logansargeant and I brought your blanket?? y/n.89 but did you bring me macas, my favorite movie, AND legos?

olliebearman that's it mom - I'm coming to visit before you actually die

y/n.89 SON! olliebearman MOM! arthur_leclerc son? olliebearman DAD? maxverstappen1 son?! charles_leclerc dad?! olliebearman grandfathers? landonorris hold-up

y/n_updates POOKIE?? HELLO?

y/nxarthur me rn, having the urge to say something about the word "pookie": STAY IN THE BOX, NO! STAY IN THE BOX, NO!

that_1_y/n_fan I wonder what the doctor said

y/n.89 basically I have bruises in the shape of my seatbelt and a sprained ankle from kicking the side of the RB20 to get out. just some r&r needed before Shanghai! y/n.fan703 oh my gosh feel better!

danielricciardo hope you feel better darl! Heidi and I will be over with some actual food

lewishamilton Roscoe says that you need some snuggles, we'll come over when you tell us to francisca.gomez coming over with pear and some other get better goodies :D y/n.89 I love you all!

maxverstappen1 was the Lego set really necessary?

arthur_leclerc YES y/n.89 YES landonorris YES oscarpiastri YES logansargeant YES maxverstappen1 ok sheesh, sorry

y/n-y/n-fan is no one going to address the middle picture??

author shhhhhhhh (its for the plot)

f1_fanatic Ocon better watch out cause it's on SIGHT

TAG LIST: @fionaschicken @glitterquadricorn @laura-naruto-fan1998 @treehouse-mouse @sam-is-lost @kagatinkita @fangirl125reader @megatrilss1885 @myxticmoon @angsthology @cmleitora @agent-curt-mega @graciewrote @ashy-kit @slutofmultifandom @aexitizen-ln4 @sugarvibez @vellicora @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @cashtons-wife @hoetel-manager @xcharlottemikaelsonx @jayda12 @cassie0sstuff @ilove-tswizzle @justme2042 @itsjustkhaos @nikfigueiredo @stopeatread @cha-hot @sadg3 @iloveyou3000morgan @s4turnsl0ver @alessioayla @torchbearerkyle @leptitlu @awekbachira @shreks-sugar-daddy @v1naco @stan-josie @mellowarcadefun @badassturtle13 @beskardroids @callisposts @poppyalice2001 @juniper-july19

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gguk-n · 5 months ago

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Growth & Realisation (Oscar Piastri x Reader)

Summary- In a world where you are destined to be with someone forever, a hopeless romantic lives her life in hope of finally finding her soulmate.

Part 1 Alt ending

ENDING Oscar's POV

I left that day, leaving my soulmate for good or so I thought. That's the funny thing about fate you see, you can't avoid it. If it was meant to be then it was meant to be. Things between me and my girlfriend soured after that. It was like we fought about the smallest of things and couldn't see eye to eye. All I could think about was my soulmate in the moments we fought, would she also get angry at me the same way my girlfriend did. Her name sounded so pretty, that interaction embedded in my heart. But every time I tried to remember her voice I would also remember the heart break I caused. It served me right. The relationship I held onto to let her go was falling apart right in front of my eyes and I didn't know how to fix it.

After 6 months of back and forth me and my girlfriend finally broke up. It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. I spent most of my time wallowing in my own pity. I didn't know where she lived or what she did. How was I going to find her? All of this had started to affect my racing. Charles had really taken on the role of a big brother after the adoption that happened as a joke. He had noticed my turmoil.

Charles sat me down one day, "Hey Oscar, is everything alright? You've been so out of it lately." he said. I didn't know what to tell him or where to start but I knew one thing he was/ had been in a similar predicament. "What did you do when you found your soulmate while you were dating your ex?" Charles seemed to understand where this was going, "I broke up with her and started seeing my soulmate." he said. "Was it that easy to leave the person you loved for your soulmate?" I asked. "It was a no brainer, she was the love of my life. We were fated to be together for the rest of our lives." He answered. I let out an exasperated sigh.

I ran a hand through my already messy hair, I muttered, "Fuck" and kept rubbing my eyes which were now raw from all the rubbing. Charles sat there quietly waiting for me to talk to him. He didn't push me. I slowly began speaking, "6 months ago, I met my soulmate." I breathed out while he waited for me to continue. "I was in a relationship at that time and I didn't want to give up that comfort for something new. So I rejected my soulmate. But every day since then I've been in turmoil. My relationship ended. I can't drive properly, I can't think straight. Every waking moment is occupied with the thought of my soulmate. Even sleep wouldn't grace me to end my misery." I spoke. Charles patted my back, "Mate, you fucked up. I don't know what to say but you should try to find her. That's the only way. She is supposed to be the one. That's why your heart is like this. You shouldn't have rejected her. I am not sure if she will take you back but you can try. Meeting your soulmate is a once in a life time thing and you just blew it. Let's hope for your sake, you get another chance." I felt like crying, this can't be happening I thought.

10 years later

It has been so long since that incident, but I hadn't stopped looking. I went back to the city we first met every once in a while in search of Y/N. I knew the city like the back of my hand at this point. I travelled the world more than necessary in hopes of meeting her. My racing career was slowly winding down, having won a lot of races and finding success that I always dreamt of. The one thing missing was the person I could share this with. I dreamt of our kids and them becoming racers too.

On an uneventful day in autumn, I was back home for the weekend. The morning swim was quite refreshing but a good coffee would really wake me up. I went to the new cafe that had popped up near my parent's house. As I neared the cafe, I saw something peculiar. My red string of fate had become visible again, after 10 years. Maybe fate was really giving me another chance and I wasn't going to fuck it up again. I followed the thread to finally see her. She looked beautiful as ever, I started to walk towards her when she saw me and bolted. I ran after her, calling out her name. She was fast but after a few minutes I was able to finally catch her. "Y/N, Hi! I'm Oscar Piastri, your soulmate." I said, the dichotomy of the statement. She blinked at me thrice before freeing herself from my grasp. "What do you want?" she spat. I could feel the hurt. "I-I-I, uhm, we're soulmates. I've been searching for you for so long. I'm just happy we met." I said scratching my neck. She looked at me confused, "I thought you had a girlfriend and we couldn't be together" she said. "That was a long time ago, and I broke up with her soon after we met. I just, I'm sorry for being an ass. I just wanted us to give it another go. I searched every country for you. It's funny how you are here, the last place I would look." I laughed. "You don't have to forgive me immediately. But I really want to be with you. If you'll let me?" I rushed to complete my sentence in one breath.

Tears started to well up in her eyes, I quickly reached to wipe them off. My hands cupping her cheeks. "You know I've been watching you everyday since then, making sure you were ok, celebrating your wins and crying at your loses. I watched all of your content and held onto all the merch and memorabilia but I couldn't get myself to go to another race. This feels like a dream. You've broken my trust for sure and I can't let you in immediately, but you are my soulmate at the end of the day." She said. I was crying at this point. She wiped away my tears. "I'm so sorry Y/N. I'll make it up to you for the rest of my life. I promise." She smiled for the first time since we met. "Can I kiss you?" I whispered. "I thought you'd never ask." She said as she pushed herself up to meet my lips. The moment was perfect and I was going to cherish this and her for the rest of my life.

I hope you like it. There is an alternate ending if you like angst.

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bloomingpresent · 28 days ago

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FERRO ROSSO Chapter IX

Pairing: Charles Leclerc/Female reader digital artist older woman

Summary: in your mid 30’s you never imagined you’d be divorced. To help with the healing process you decide to return to your first love: digital illustration. Posting videos of your art online leads you to work for Ferrari. But you never thought it’d lead you to find somebody who’s going to bring you back to trust again in love.

Warnings: NSFW! 18+, swearing mention of sexual words, consensual sex, penetration, cheating, sexually themed. IT’S ALL ABOUT REVERSE AGE GAP HERE. Older woman with a younger man. They are both adults, don’t be judgemental.

Disclaimer: I don’t mean any offense to Mr. Leclerc.

English isn’t my first language so all mistakes are my own.

All the previous chapters are here

Charles POV:

Charles watches you leave for the briefing, your back straight, your steps brisk. He's stuck in place, his jaw tight, his mind churning with guilt and determination. It’s not supposed to be this way, he thinks. He had dragged you into his world—one that’s all speed, noise, and constant scrutiny—without considering the consequences.

But he couldn’t deny what he felt, even if the timing was terrible. Seeing you with your guarded eyes and sharp wit had been a breath of fresh air. You were different from everyone else in the paddock: you saw beyond the shiny facade and asked him questions that cut straight to the heart. It’s no wonder he was hooked from the start.

The problem was the mess he created. He had been careless. Bringing his girlfriend to that party after things had gotten intense between the two of you was reckless and cruel. It wasn’t fair to anyone, least of all to you. Now he’s left with the fallout: a tangled mess of desire, regret, and a desperate need to fix things.

As the media commitments continue, Charles finds himself half-listening to questions, his focus elsewhere. Every time you enter his line of sight, there’s a tug at his chest. He’s reminded of the stolen moments you’ve shared, both fiery and tender, and how they’ve been tainted by his mistakes.

When there’s a brief pause in the chaos, he seizes the chance to corner you in a quiet alcove of the paddock. You look wary as he approaches, arms crossed as if to shield yourself from whatever he might say.

“I need to talk to you,” he starts, his voice low but urgent.

“Now?” You raise an eyebrow, not backing down. “I’m trying to do my job, Charles.”

“I know, and I’m sorry. But I need you to hear me out, please.”

You glance around, making sure no one is watching. “This better be good.”

He lets out a frustrated breath, running a hand through his hair. “I screwed up. I know that. I never meant for you to get hurt, but I can’t change what happened.”

“Then what’s the point of this conversation?” you ask, your tone icy.

“I want you to understand why I pushed for this role for you. It wasn’t just for me—it was because I believe in you, in your talent. You deserve this opportunity.”

“You can’t just manipulate my career because you feel guilty,” you snap, eyes blazing. “This isn’t some twisted form of compensation, Charles.”

“It’s not about guilt,” he insists, taking a step closer. “It’s about what’s real between us. I know it’s a mess, but I care about you more than I’ve ever cared about anyone.”

There it is, raw and exposed. He watches you process his words, your defenses visibly wavering for a moment before snapping back into place.

“Caring isn’t enough,” you say quietly. “I need to protect myself, and I can’t do that if I’m constantly trying to decipher your feelings or your motives.”

He feels a pang of helplessness, a sense that he’s losing you before he ever truly had you. “I don’t want to lose you,” he admits, his voice breaking slightly. “I know I have no right to ask for another chance, but I’m asking anyway.”

You take a deep breath, looking conflicted. “I don’t know if I can trust you, Charles. Not after everything.”

The vulnerability in your eyes is like a punch to his gut. He reaches out, but you instinctively pull back, as if afraid to let him get too close.

“I get it,” he says softly, dropping his hand. “But I won’t give up. Not on you, not on us—whatever ‘us’ even means right now.”

“Why does this matter so much to you?” you demand, voice trembling with a mix of anger and sadness.

“Because you matter to me,” he answers simply. “And I know I’m not good at this—I mess things up, and I’m scared as hell of making it worse. But I want to try, if you’ll let me.”

There’s a long silence, heavy with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. He waits, hoping you’ll find a way to meet him halfway. But as you look at him, he sees the walls you’ve built and knows it’ll take more than words to break them down.

“Right now,” you finally say, your voice steady, “I just need space to figure things out. If you really care, you’ll respect that.”

It’s not the answer he wants, but it’s something. He nods slowly, accepting your terms even as it tears at him.

“Okay,” he agrees. “But I’m not giving up. Not yet.”

You don’t respond, your eyes lingering on him for a second longer before you turn and walk away, leaving him standing alone in the narrow corridor. The weight of his mistakes hangs heavy, but for the first time, he feels a glimmer of hope. It’s fragile and uncertain, but it’s there.

And maybe, just maybe, that’s enough—for now.

Later at Y/N’s hotel room.

You toss and turn in bed, sleep eluding you. You replay the heated conversation with Charles in your head, dissecting every word, every emotion. You feel trapped between two opposing desires: the need to protect your heart and the undeniable pull he has on you. By the time dawn breaks, you’re no closer to a decision.

“Ugh,” you groan into your pillow, realizing that in just a few hours you’ll have to face him again.

The morning sun streams through the curtains of your hotel room, reminding you that it’s already practice day. You gather your things, determined to maintain your professionalism despite the swirling emotions inside. You quickly get dressed and head to the paddock, hoping that the chaos of race weekend will distract you.

The paddock is buzzing with activity as you arrive. Engines roar, media scramble for interviews, and teams rush around in a flurry of preparation. You take a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for the day ahead.

Charles is already at the Ferrari garage, his focus seemingly on the upcoming session. You try to keep your distance, but as the team starts gathering for a quick briefing, you have no choice but to join him.

“Morning,” he greets, his voice casual but his eyes searching yours.

“Morning,” you reply, keeping your tone neutral.

There’s a moment of awkward silence as the rest of the team begins discussing logistics. You scribble notes furiously, trying to keep your mind from wandering to the way his jaw tenses when he concentrates, or the faint stubble lining his chin.

During the session, you’re forced to work side by side, monitoring media requests and planning interviews. The close proximity makes your skin tingle, but you do your best to stay focused. At one point, Charles leans closer to look at the list on your tablet, his arm brushing against yours.

“Sorry,” he murmurs, but there’s a hint of something more in his voice—something that makes your breath hitch.

“It’s fine,” you manage to say, though your voice is tighter than you’d like.

Just as things start to feel overwhelmingly intense, Carlos Sainz appears, grinning like he’s in on a private joke.

“Hola, Y/N!” he exclaims, his energy infectious. “You seem stressed. Charles giving you a hard time, huh?”

You laugh, relieved for the distraction. “He’s always a handful.”

Carlos chuckles, playfully nudging Charles with his elbow. “Don’t worry. I can be your new assistant if he gets too annoying. I make excellent coffee, you know.”

Charles shoots Carlos a look, trying to play it off, but you see the tension in his posture. He’s not used to seeing you this relaxed with someone else, and it clearly bothers him.

“Careful, Carlos,” Charles warns with a smirk, though his eyes flash with something darker. “She might actually take you up on that.”

“Oh, really?” you tease, enjoying the game. “Maybe I will. I could use someone more reliable.”

Carlos laughs loudly, enjoying the banter. “I am always at your service, Y/N. Anything to make Charles squirm a little.”

It’s meant to be a lighthearted jab, but it has a different effect. You see Charles’s jaw clench, his gaze narrowing as he watches the interaction between you and Carlos. He’s not amused anymore—he’s irritated, maybe even jealous.

As the conversation continues, Carlos’s playful demeanor makes you feel seen in a way that doesn’t involve the heavy tension you’ve had with Charles. For a moment, you let yourself forget the drama, laughing at Carlos’s jokes and enjoying the easy chemistry.

But then you catch Charles’s gaze, and the intensity in his eyes nearly takes your breath away. It’s as if he’s silently telling you that this playful game with Carlos isn’t going to change anything between you and him. You feel a rush of heat at the thought, a reminder of the magnetic pull you’ve been trying to resist.

The rest of the morning passes in a blur. Charles is distant but focused, and you sense a simmering frustration beneath his calm exterior. You wonder if he’s regretting pushing you into this role, or if he’s more determined than ever to keep you close.

As the day winds down, you retreat to your hotel room, hoping for a moment of clarity. But all you feel is confusion. Your body hums with the memory of Charles’s touch, your mind replaying the way he looked at you earlier—like he couldn’t decide whether to kiss you or fight you.

You’re just starting to unwind when there’s a knock at your door.

Your heart leaps, and you instinctively know who it is.

You pause at the door, your hand hovering above the handle. You know who’s on the other side, and the weight of the moment makes your breath catch. When you finally gather the courage to open it, Charles stands there, the dim lighting from the hallway casting shadows on his face.

His expression is conflicted—equal parts desire and hesitation. “Can I come in?” he asks softly, his voice almost uncertain for the first time.

You nod silently, stepping aside to let him in. The room feels charged, the air thick with unspoken words. As he steps closer, you see the storm of emotions swirling in his eyes. You can’t hold back any longer; whatever this is, it’s real and it’s right here in front of you.

“I tried to stay away,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough. “But I can’t. I don’t want to pretend anymore.”

You swallow hard, the vulnerability in his words breaking down the last of your defenses. “I don’t know how to do this,” you admit, voice shaky.

“Then let’s figure it out together,” he says, his gaze intense as he takes your hand, slowly pulling you closer.

There’s a moment of stillness before he dips his head, his lips brushing softly against yours. It’s tentative at first, as if he’s testing your response. But the second you kiss him back, something snaps—like a dam breaking, releasing a flood of suppressed longing. His kiss deepens, urgent yet tender, as if he’s trying to convey everything he can’t say in words.

His hands cup your face, thumbs brushing your cheeks, and the tenderness of the gesture makes your heart swell. You can feel his need for you, but it’s laced with a kind of reverence that makes your body shiver. You respond in kind, letting your hands find their way to his chest, feeling the rapid thump of his heartbeat beneath your palms.

Charles’s lips trail down to your neck, leaving a path of heat in their wake. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispers against your skin, the words raw and reverent.

The world outside ceases to exist. All that matters is the warmth of his touch, the way he seems to worship every part of you with his mouth and hands. His fingers are gentle, tracing your skin as if he’s savoring the feel of you beneath his fingertips.

He lifts you effortlessly, carrying you to the bed as if you’re something precious. When he lays you down, there’s a moment where he just looks at you, his eyes filled with an unspoken promise.

You undress each other. Words are replaced by caresses and kisses. This is not just sex, this is intimacy.

“I want to make you feel good,” he murmurs, his voice heavy with need but tinged with a softness that takes you by surprise.

And he does. He’s slow, deliberate, taking his time to explore you with a kind of devotion you’ve never felt before. His mouth trails down your body, and every kiss, every touch, feels like a silent vow. He’s attentive, reading every gasp, every arch of your back, as he finds the rhythm that makes you tremble beneath him.

You're still tense, you know this isn't just sex, and you don't want to let go.

“Let go,” he urges, his voice low and coaxing as he moves in a way that’s both commanding and tender. “I want this for you.”

And you do. You let yourself fall into the moment, giving in to the waves of pleasure that crash over you, raw and overwhelming. Charles watches you with an intensity that makes you feel cherished, his eyes locked on yours even as you lose yourself completely.

The way his tongue plays with your nipples, the way his fingers caress your clit. It's all designed to give you pleasure. Maybe he's not thinking about it, maybe he's acting on instinct, you can't figure it out right now.

When he finally takes you fully, it’s slow and gentle at first, as if he’s savoring every second. He’s careful, almost reverent, but as the tension builds, the urgency grows. His thrusts become more insistent, matching the rising heat between you. You meet each other in a perfect rhythm, bodies moving together in a way that feels both primal and achingly intimate.

He is also vulnerable now, he is not thinking about himself, he is thinking about giving you pleasure, seeing and feeling the way your body responds, fills him with pleasure too.

He whispers your name like a prayer, his voice husky and filled with desire. “I don’t want this to end,” he admits between ragged breaths, his forehead pressed against yours.

You cling to him, the intensity of the moment making your heart feel raw. “Then don’t,” you whisper back, your voice filled with emotion.

It’s a feverish kind of passion, but beneath it all, there’s a softness, a tenderness that wraps around you like a warm embrace. It’s not just about the physical—it’s about something deeper, something that’s been simmering between you for too long.

You moan his name as he brings you to climax. The feeling of your orgasms around him and the way you moan his name brings him to climax as well. He doesn't take his eyes off of you as he finishes. The connection.

He kisses your neck after a few moments of sliding out of you. He goes to the bathroom to get rid of the condom. You're staring at the ceiling savoring the pleasure.

When he comes back, you lie together, tangled in sheets and each other’s warmth. Charles’s fingers trace patterns on your skin, his breath still uneven. You’re both quiet, the silence filled with a kind of contentment you hadn’t expected.

But you know he can’t stay. It’s clear in the way he holds you a little tighter, as if trying to imprint the memory of this moment before reality intrudes.

“Stay,” you whisper, the word slipping out before you can stop it.

He lifts his head, brushing a soft kiss against your forehead. “I wish I could,” he says honestly, regret etched in his voice. “But I have to be up early.”

The thought of him leaving makes your chest tighten, but you nod, understanding. He carefully untangles himself from you, pulling on his clothes with quiet efficiency. Before he leaves, he sits on the edge of the bed, his hand reaching out to gently stroke your hair.

“I’m not walking away,” he promises, his voice soft but firm. “We’ll figure this out.”

You manage a small smile, your heart aching even as hope flares. “I know.”

He leans down for one last kiss, soft and lingering, as if he’s trying to hold onto this moment for as long as he can. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” he whispers against your lips.

Then he’s gone, the door clicking softly behind him. You’re left lying in the dark, feeling a mix of fulfillment and longing that you can’t quite put into words. It’s the start of something, but what that ‘something’ is, you’re not sure yet.

All you know is that you’re willing to find out.

P.S: I'd love your here your feedback! Or if you have any suggestions. I had a bit of a emotional brake downwriting that last part. And please! Oh please listen to that song in the story. Love ya!

Tags: @janeh22 @elenizacharop @h-jpg

#charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc x older woman #charles leclerc x y/n #charles leclerc x you #reverse age gap #older woman x younguer man #ferro rosso #f1 fic

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nyoomfruits · 2 years ago

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YES baby au director’s commentary on the part where Julie calls Max ‘dad’ I was tearing up tbh

oh my god i'm SO glad you asked that's like one of my favorite scenes

i did some research (aka i scrolled all the way back in my chat with eby to when i first mentioned this fic idea to her) and this was legitimately one of the first things i mentioned wanting to include, and it truly speaks to how much i loved the idea of this scene that it actually ended up making it in because a lot of the early stuff gets left on the cutting room floor (case in point: i have a word document with all the deleted scenes that also has some scenes from max's pov because i did consider in the beginning to do it from his pov instead of charles's)

i also dont think much changed from how we originally imagined it?? eby pretty quickly came up with the neck/jaw grabbing thing (ALL the credit to her for that one) and the rest turned out pretty much how i had it in my head, which once again does't happen very often

(for example: the road trip scene with baby shark was never meant to exist, they were supposed to take the plane, until i got to that scene and realized they were going to monza which is only 4 hours by car so the car made much more sense and the rest is history lmao)

ALSO funny detail about charles's 'what if i'm just a bad dad' speech: originally i had that written (or a form of it at least) for the first time max came over, but that felt almost too intimate for where they were in that point in their relationship and i ended up replacing it with the whole 'fuck you you're good at everything' thing. the bad dad speech ended up in the deleted scenes word document though, and i ended up using a lot of that for this scene :)

alright one last thing about this scene and then i'll shut up about it (listen i wasn't kidding when i said it's one of my favorites): because i knew this was a scene that was going to happen from very early on, there's actually loads of little foreshadowing moments!! for example, max says 'your dad' A LOT (almost every time he speaks to julie. he never says charles, he always says 'your dad'), and my personal favorite, this part:

“Yeah, Julie bug,” Max says, laughter in his voice, “We’re going to hang out for a bit while your dad does some work.”

“Da!” Julie says decisively, and Charles takes that as his que to leave, moving back to his office.

it's the first time julie says 'da', it's right after max says 'your dad' and it's directed at max

no one probably caught that except for me but i had a lot of fun writing it into the fic so that's what counts i guess lmao

but yeah! the dad scene, in all its glory. i'm sorry it made you tear up though but i'm glad you liked it enough to ask me about it <3

#well that got away from me #but i just really love this scene lmao #also surprisingly one of the easiest scenes to write in this fic #you'll be alright #lestappen

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darklydeliciousdesires · 2 years ago

Text

Beyond the Blood Tie - Chapter Twenty Nine.

Previous Chapters - One Two, Part One Part Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen Eighteen Nineteen Twenty Twenty One Twenty Two Twenty Three Twenty Four Twenty Five Twenty Six Twenty Seven Twenty Eight

Words - 5,427

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI!

Angel's POV

"The soothing, relaxing, vibrating girlfriend," I hum softly to Edie, while she lies naked on top of me, shaking yet boiling hot. Flu is a fucker, and right now it's fucking her big time.

"Don't, don't make me laugh or I'll start coughing again!" she exclaims, before doing just that, hacking her lungs up. I reach over to the nightstand and pick up her bottle of cough syrup, which she takes a mouthful of before I stretch to return it there and continue idly stoking her nakedness. Lying against me like this is very soothing for her since she's almost permanently boiling hot, and with my body temperature being that of a stone, I work well in reducing her raging fever. She's been sick for three days now, and when I dropped the note in to Tyrell Cleaves at the CD he wasn't impressed, even questioning Charles and his worth as a doctor.

I stayed around for the phone call he made to Charles, and stood there laughing quietly when my 'father' blasted him with a barrage of accolades and then asked him if he'd like a diagnosis for his ignorance, because he'd be happy to give him one. 'The letters after my name actually mean something, you know, you dull-witted oaf!' Charles raged at him before hanging up. I was in hysterics as soon as I got outside of the building. Edie laughed too when I'd arrived home later that night and told her.

"You know, I actually wanted to book a little time off work so I could spend some time with you, but this wasn't exactly what I had planned, being so sick I can hardly fucking move," she complains, her shudders still not stopping.

"In turn, I hate seeing you like this, knowing there ain't much I can do about it," I lament, stroking her damp hair and kissing her head. She's all clammy with sweat right now.

"Isn't much you can do? Angel, you've been looking after me for the last three days, putting me first when you can around having to go to work and rest in the day. There isn't a single other thing you could be doing for me that you aren't already. Hell, you're even foregoing a full day's rest to make sure I'm okay," she tells me, moving to kiss my cheek and then groaning in pain. Even though it was over one hundred and thirty years ago, I still remember only too well how crippling having the flu is. Edie lamented that she felt like she'd been beaten all over with hammers, she ached so much, which is just how I felt when I was bedridden by it for ten days as a human.

"I suppose you're right. I forget how wonderful I am sometimes."

“Oh, such modesty.” Her joke makes me laugh quietly, reaching for the cool wash cloth and dabbing her forehead with it again. Lying here, being attentive and talking to her is about all I can do at the moment, since she's too sick for me to take her out anywhere or enjoy rolling her around the bed in the name of wild sex. I understand that she feels rotten, so I'm not going to pester her for it, although I’m horny as fuck. It’s here that I suddenly have an idea after looking at my watch and seeing I have to be at work in an hour from now. I'll go in today, but after tonight I'm cancelling my appointments for the next week, so I get to spend more time with Edie since she isn't working at the moment either.

I have all eternity to tattoo people and whatever other careers I might go into in my immortal time here, but I don't have all eternity with Edie, sadly. I want to enjoy her as much as I can, so take great pleasure in telling her of my plans upon my arrival home six hours later, finding her lying in the bath fully submerged. I just stand in the doorway and look at her for a few moments as she lies with her head under the water, before she obviously feels me right there and emerges to give me a big smile. No other human has ever captured my interest or my heart as much as Miss Bailey here.

"Are you hovering for a reason?" she asks, before puckering her lips at me. I go over to her and plant a kiss on them before beginning to undress.

"Just thinking how lovely you are while deciding to interrupt your bath or not," I tell her.

"I see you've made up your mind there then," she nods, as I remove the last of my clothes and slide into the hot water behind her.

"I have, and I also made up my mind on something else, too. I've cancelled all of my appointments for the next week so I can spend all the time I want to with you. I have all eternity to work, I don't have all eternity with you.” Wrapping her in my arms, I kiss her head, noting that she feels a little cooler now, fever wise.

"You didn't have to do that, I'm not much company anyway at the moment, and also won't it be bad for business, you just clearing your schedule for the next week? Your clients will be so disappointed," she states, turning to look at me with a little concern.

"They've all been rescheduled for later times over the next month, so no one is going to be disappointed. Besides, you should know by now that you're the only human I give a shit about," I assure her, watching her smile before she rests her head back against my shoulder. Tonight is the start of the nights to follow where Edie and I lie together, be it in the bathtub, the bed, or downstairs in the back yard when she's feeling too hot, and talk about anything and everything.

"I met Eric when Ursula visited a vampire who used to live in his former nest. I thought he was the weirdest vamp I'd encountered, but it was that difference in him that I ended up liking. I mean there's no doubt about the fact he's a vampire, but he has good human attributes too that some vampires lose forever. He's savage when he's pissed off or in combat though. One of our favourite things to do shortly after we met him was to go and kill the reanimated together. I remember one time just for fun, me, him and EZ went into the middle of Vegas with machine guns and deliberately stood there in the street firing off round after round into the air to bring out the dead, and then tore them all apart," I explain in reminiscence as we sit on the large and ornate wrought iron bench in the back yard a few more days into her sickness. She wanted to know more about how it was back when the disaster had struck.

"How did you kill them if you couldn't drain them?" she questions with interest, pulling the blanket she's wrapped in around herself a little tighter. She says she feels cold, yet her skin is like a furnace. At least she's stopped throwing up for the time, six days in now.

"We'd tear their heads off, or just punch them straight through the skull. That was the only way to kill them, a direct blow to the head. We used to make their heads explode everywhere, it was fun. Ursula came with us once and recorded it on a video camera. She said it was like her version of a normal mother filming her kids' graduation. I've no idea where the tape is now, I even looked for it earlier. What I did find, though, are my Godfather trilogy DVD’s. I remember you said you’d only seen the first one.” Immediately, her eyes light up.

"Ooooh, yes! But not until later, as right now I’m really enjoying out conversation, now that I finally feel I can concentrate better.” She's been a little out of it with the flu medicine she's been taking recently, but after Charles read the labels on the bottles and packets, he promptly put them in the bin. He told her all she needed was ibuprofen to lower her temperature and ease her physical discomfort, and tea tree oil to help with her sinus trouble, which would also help cleanse her of germs. He bought both for her himself, and I'll never forget the lecture I got when he arrived back. 'I don't know what you bought all of that highly caffeinated and sugar laden crap for! I bloody told you not to, quite specifically, too! All this modern witchcraft medicine, these pharmaceutical companies and their money-making chicanery, it's enough to make me want to spit!' he fumed while heading upstairs, leaving me laughing in his wake. I love how he denounces anything he doesn't think is beneficial to medicine as witchcraft.

"I know what we haven't done and said we'd do, look up ideas for the tattoo you want here," I suggest, moving the arm that's around her to reach down and trail my fingertips over the small scars on her chest.

"Oh yeah, I'd forgotten all about that! Let's go now, I feel better for getting some air anyway," she replies excitedly, standing up. We head back inside and up to my room, where I switch my computer on and then pull her down onto my lap to begin looking at images once it's loaded up.

"Look at the date, we've been together properly for a month today," I tell her, after noticing the time and date icon load at the lower right-hand side of the screen. Her face is a picture of surprise.

"A month, really? Is it that long already?"

"It is, happy anniversary, even though it's lame to have one for your first month," I tell her, giving her a kiss.

"Yeah, pretty lame. That's why I'm not returning the sentiment. And to think you're a vampire too. I dunno," she teases softly with an eye roll, making me laugh. I'm always amused when she mocks me, because it's good to hear. I can't have banter with humans; they're all too scared of me. Edie isn't though, and I love it.

"I'll be mean to you for a while to make up for it then," I joke, still laughing a little.

She leans to kiss my head, her nails combing through my hair. “That’s better.” We sit for an hour looking over different designs and ideas, with Edie pulling very thoughtful faces as we work through the various themes.

"What about if I did something that went down both sides of your chest, say from here to here," I suggest, trailing my finger from her collarbone to the top of her breast where the white lines run to.

"I don't know, I don't want it to be anything too big or bold, but now you're making me start to worry it'll look funny just on one side," she says, looking down at her chest.

"Well, I'll draw out two of whatever you have done and do one first, and then if you want the other, I'll have the line drawing right there. You need to decide what you want first though.” She doesn't make that decision tonight, getting a headache after looking at the computer for an hour and wanting to go to bed after that.

She falls asleep quickly, and so as not to disturb her I head downstairs and wait for Ursula to arrive home. Heading to the kitchen, I pull out some fresh cuts of meat from the fridge for Icarus and Thor, throwing them into their bowls. When I whistle for them, they come running just as I expect, but just five seconds after they've put their heads down to eat, they're startled by something none of us expected. That something is for a bloody and beaten EZ to open the kitchen door and come crashing through, swaying on his feet before falling. I catch him before he hits the floor.

"What the fuck happened to you?" I ask as I haul him up and kick out a chair at the kitchen table to sit him in.

"Ten other vampires, back there right at the bottom of the main road just before I was about to turn up to here. I knew there was about four of them lurking as soon as I turned the corner, the other six caught up pretty quickly, though. I can't talk… I need blood," he grunts, holding a hand to where he's obviously been stabbed in the lung with something silver. Knowing Edie is sick and sleeping (and selfishly I'm not willing to share my food source) but seeing that my brother needs blood quickly, I zoom out without word, traveling the two-minute walk to Ursula's human friend Angela's house in about ten seconds at my speed. Twenty seconds after that and she's standing in the kitchen with me, EZ's mouth clapped around her wrist. Just then, Charles arrives.

"I'll have the fangs of whoever did this, and I will find out who," he states vehemently, after casting his eye over EZ.

"No, you won't. You know as my creator I'd never tell you what to do, but when you hear what I have to say, you'll back off. They were anti-TVM vigilantes, and they gave me a message. Unless Ursula surrender and expose her ties with the TVM and its other figureheads, this and worse happens to Angel. I suppose they needed someone to make their point with before that happened," he reveals after feeding, sealing Angela's wrist and then kissing it as he looks up at her. I don't think she will be going home tonight. She's about the only human he can tolerate, and that is because she's a very intelligent woman, and a damn good fuck too, apparently.

"In turn to match your initial words, no, they won't. I can bet just who is behind this, and it isn't who they said they were. The vampires who attacked you were sent by Elias, no doubt. Trying to scare Ursula into confessing to something she has no involvement in by doing this to you and threatening worse for Angel," he spits bitterly. Shit, all of this just took a sharp fucking turn.

Edie's POV

"There'll be more water on the floor than there is in the bath by the time we're done," I exclaim through ragged breaths, my nails running down my boyfriend's back.

"You're mistaking me for someone who gives a shit," comes his panted reply before our lips meet again in a heated kiss, with him thrusting into me so hard, my mouth breaks away and I practically scream. I'm all better after my bout of flu last week, but this week literally as soon as I was feeling well enough for sex, what happened? I got my fucking period, that's what happened.

Usually Angel won't come near me (menstrual blood, since it isn’t fresh is kinda repelling for vampires) but when you add the fact that we haven't had sex for a week to the fact that a bath is a self-cleaning system for messy sex, well, he couldn't wait another five days for my bleeding to finish, let's put it that way. He's been so sexually wound up that I'm surprised I actually have a vagina left, to put it mildly.

I came in from work and this was the first place I wanted to go, just to relax more than anything. Hah. "Angel! Will you leave the poor girl to bathe for at least half an hour in peace before you go charging in there like some kind of crazed sex demon!" was what Ursula shouted at him when she overheard him trying to invade my bath time and me protesting it. Oh god, I laughed so hard!

I'll give him his due, I think he lasted for about twenty minutes before he came charging in with more horn than your average mountain goat. Not that I'm complaining, I at least got to relax for a little bit before I got set upon by the sexual beast that is my boyfriend. I've missed his touch in the erotic sense, and right now I don't think this is going to be over at any time soon. I think this is the perfect way to take our minds off the fact that as of nearly two weeks ago, the campaign against Ursula was reignited by EZ having seven shades of shit beaten out of him.

This happened when I was still ill, and I was sleeping when EZ apparently came home stabbed several times with silver knifes. According to his account, he was jumped by ten other vampires. He managed to throw one of them off before the other nine got to work on him, one silvering his throat with a chain while the rest beat him with silver knuckle dusters and stabbed him in the face and chest. He was okay after he'd fed, of course, and spent the rest of the evening showing his gratitude to Angela in very, very loud ways. That woman squeals like an amplified mouse at the cusp of orgasm, and he got her to that point more times than my ears want to remember. What followed that incident has been much, much worse. Everyone even remotely associated with Ursula has been targeted.

Three nights ago, what could be so classically described as an angry mob arrived here at the house, threatening to set the place on fire with all of us in it. How Ursula kept her temper with them, I'll never know. She calmly asked them exactly what evidence they had against her, asked them for just one piece. 'We know you were brought in for questioning!' the ringleader said from behind his covered face (yeah, they were so brave they covered their faces, fucking cowards) to which she asked him if there had been anything found to be implicating in that questioning, why would she still be a free woman?

He couldn't answer that. He also couldn't answer the question of why there was a human standing there next to her who she had her arm around, and was perfectly safe and happy. That human was me. 'I suggest you all get off my property at once, or I'll show you just what a one thousand plus year old vampire can do all by herself.'

That is what she told them before they and their fiery torches all moved away. She knew she shouldn't have threatened them, but Ursula will be damned to her final death before she lets anyone put the safety of her family in jeopardy. 'You are my family too' she told me, kissing my head just after we went back inside. That gesture made me beam, to be counted as family to someone. I know I am to people like Vic and Aileen too, but for Ursula to say it just made me feel extra special. I've only been with Angel for six weeks, but the way I was welcomed into the family right from the start, you'd think I'd been with him for six years.

A few days before that, there was another incident with EZ, one that was much worse than the previous one, much worse because EZ almost killed the vampire who attacked him. He'll receive no punishment for it though, because here's the twist. The vampire who attacked him was found to be affiliated with the TVM, and he attacked EZ for allegedly 'pretending' to be TVM himself. He was caught, of course. Charles felt the anger in EZ rise and zoomed to his side before EZ had chance to fatally wound the other vampire. Sadly though, when brought in for questioning, he refused to talk.

The AVA threatened him with his life and he still wouldn’t give up any names, so yesterday morning after being interrogated non-stop for eight days to no avail, he was sentenced to the final death and chained up to meet the sunrise. Angel has also had some trouble to deal with, in the form of someone trying to pin a murder of a young girl upon him and his sexual problem. Ursula discovered her body, when enjoying her garden and picking some flowers at first dark, when she smelled something coming from the manure heap at the back of the yard. Under the large heap of horse poop was the body of a naked and drained girl.

She and Charles had been away enjoying their wedding anniversary at a beautiful hotel up in California the evening before, and she knew that it'd had been left there specifically for her to uncover as soon as she arrived home and then (hopefully for them) try and better hide the body to keep Angel out of trouble. She did exactly what they didn't expect, and reported the find immediately. Of course, she and Charles (who was quite angry at Angel for leaving the house unguarded, since EZ was away running a less illegal errand for Charles at the time) were off the hook as the poor girl had died while they were away, so that just meant EZ and Angel had fingers pointed at them, and of course both of them could give concrete alibi's. EZ was in a massive vampire bar when he was seen by many who came forward and vouched for his presence, and Angel was in me over at my place, so there's his alibi.

What was worrying about this is the fact Ursula knows they were trying to pin this on Angel, and then unravel the rest of the bodies left in his wake, pin some TVM related bullcrap on him and then also succeed in putting further evidence to the case against her. This is worrying because only a handful of vampires, ones she has known for centuries and trusts with everything knows about Angel and his problem with all human women except for me.

She's now worried that whoever is working with Elias could possibly someone close to her. She told all of this to her creator, Constance, who was so perturbed by the idea that she is currently in the sky on a plane, flying out here to Nevada to assist 'before things get any worse than they are, my girl' as I overheard her word it to Ursula on the telephone a few nights ago. She and her newest offspring, a vampire by the name of John will be staying here at the house.

"Are you alright?" The lady herself asks me as I hobble into the kitchen just before 5am. I say hobble, because Angel only finally let me out from underneath him five minutes ago, and after you've had the sexual equivalent of a bull in an antique shop for the last near two hours, it's kind of hard to walk properly.

"No, I need to go and sit on a block of ice for an hour or so. Ouch," I wince, while Ursula giggles. Opening the fridge door, I locate my bottle of kiwi crush and take a few hearty swigs (since I've been with Angel and spend so much time here, there are a few more bits and pieces of human items to be found around the house) putting it away and then turning to Ursula once more. I then almost choke for laughing.

"Will this be adequate?" she says to me, holding up a massive block of ice from out of the deep freeze where she's zoomed to fetch it. We both stand there laughing heartily at her joke before composing ourselves. "You bring such joy to this house, dear child. Especially in these dark times we are facing, I thank you for being so upbeat." Walking over and smoothing my hair with her hands, she smiles widely, kissing my head. She's such a lovely lady. How could anyone hate her this much?

"I do try my best, if nothing else but to stop Angel from worrying about it all. I know he worries about your welfare more than he lets on," I confide, going to the jar on the side and pulling myself a cookie out, feeling a little peckish.

"Oh, doesn't he just. I feel that too just like you do, of course. Anyway, let me keep you no longer. I'm off to see if I have any messages waiting for me on my cell, see if any of my leads on this whole debacle have come to anything. I confess though, I feel so very clueless. I eagerly await the arrival of Constance, I feel she is my last hope, and at two thousand, six hundred and sixty-six years old, nothing at all gets past her." She explains, giving me a cheek kiss goodnight and leaving the kitchen.

I head back upstairs to Angel, for what shapes up to be round two of being fucked so hard, I’m left nothing short of dick drunk in the wake of it. He keeps me like that until 11am the next morning too, before finally he sleeps, and I more or less pass out after drinking a little blood from his wrist. I'm glad that when I wake up, my mind tricks me for a moment into thinking I have work to go to later on, until my brains kicks into gear properly and I remember it's a Saturday. Ahhh, bliss. I also remember where I'm meant to be in half an hour. Shit!

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry I overslept!" I tell Vic as I race up his driveway, with him standing there waiting for me, tapping his watch.

"Don't lie to me, you were enjoying your boyfriend, we both know that much," he teases with a snort. He actually took the news that Angel and I are in a relationship a hell of a lot better than I thought he would. 'I've been wondering just when you were going to confess that to me. The way you talk about him, well it's the way a woman talks when she likes a guy' he told me with a little knowing wink when I revealed all to him.

"That big ball of fire up there indicates otherwise," I state, pointing up at the afternoon sun. I can hardly believe it's only a week to Christmas, and Nevada is still this warm. Okay so we never really have a proper winter like the people over in Europe or on higher ground have, but it does tend to get colder and rainier in December.

"Ahhhh, I'll let you off then, just this once," Vic replies before opening his arms to me and giving me a big hug. I haven't seen him for weeks, and it feels like so much longer.

"So ,are you still coming for a drink with us later? Please say yes!" I ask as we walk inside. I'm here for an early dinner with him before we head to Vic's favourite bar in the whole world, Mackenzie's Sports bar and grill, where we'll be meeting up with Angel, who says it's high time he meets 'your father' as he worded it. Vic is the closest thing I have to a dad after all.

"Yep, I got David to cover my shift," he replies, referring to his youngest nephew.

"Good, I'm so glad because he's actually really looking forward to meeting you, and that's very telling with Angel since his interest in humans only really extends to me. He much prefers the company of his own kind," I explain as he serves up the food. Fried chicken and big, fluffy on the inside, crispy on the outside baked potatoes (he cooks them perfectly) with some collard greens. Perfect.

"In turn I look forward to meeting him, the vampire who's made you so happy. It only feels like yesterday when we were sitting at this very table, and you were spitting venom over what a nasty asshole he was. How things have changed. Oh, are you still coming to me for Christmas day? I take it you can, since Angel will be asleep," he inquires, while passing me the butter before he sits down.

"Yeah, of course, I wouldn't miss your Christmas day cook off for the world!” I've near enough always spent Christmas with Vic and his family, and I love the atmosphere in this little house so much when it's jammed full of people. All conversation then ends as we begin eating our dinner. After we're done and all the dishes have been washed and put away, we take his dog Sadie for a little walk across the big fields that back onto his street.

"So, I've been wondering, how much different is it being in a relationship with a vampire to being with a human?" he asks me as he unclips Sadie's leash and lets her run off, barking as she chases a flock of pigeons in the near distance.

"It's strange, because it really doesn't feel that different for the most part, but the reality is that it's very, very different to being with a human person. You never see them in daylight for one thing, and I actually like that since I work nights, I can see him more than if I worked in the day, I can be awake when he is and sleep with him during the day.

“Then there's the fact they don't eat, or drink anything other than blood, so sometimes places to go on a date can be limited in that respect. You also have to get used to the fact that they're wired differently to us emotionally. They're quite cold in a lot of respects, but that's the lack of life in them since they're dead. Angel is never like that with me, but of course I've seen that side of him. What else… oh yeah, the biggest difference is what they're like in bed, but we're leaving that where it is," I reply, while Vic gives me an aghast look.

"Oh come on! If I'm being truthful, that was the part I was fishing for," he exclaims, eyes wide before he roars with laughter at the look I'm currently wearing upon my face. Think startled goldfish, and you're very close.

"Vic!" I exclaim.

"What? I don't want any personal details, that'd be wrong, very wrong! But it's something I've always wondered. I mean, do they still do it like we do, or do they do it in some kind of… freaky way?" he questions curiously. When I've finished laughing at the freaky comment, I formulate my response.

"No, they still do it in the exact same way as us living people do, just with a difference. They do it faster, and for longer, and about a thousand times better than humans. They're ridiculously in tune with the person they're having sex with, and they're usually a lot older too, so they don't forget the skills, and they pick up way more than us humans ever will simply because they're lived longer," I reply, Vic nodding.

"Sounds interesting, but they scare me too much to ever try it out for myself! Those teeth, yikes," he begins, before asking me just how old Angel is.

"One hundred and thirty-six.” There's a few seconds of silence, and I turn to see him nodding before my eyes move to find Sadie towing along a big old fallen branch back in our direction, suddenly hearing a hissing noise. Oh lord, what's tickled him now?

"What's with you now?" I exclaim, trying not to laugh too. He has one of those really high-pitched laughs that automatically has me in hysterics. The noise doesn't sound like it's coming from a big guy like him.

"Your boyfriend is a hundred and eight years older than you. Ewww," he taunts, before really whooping with laughter.

"Shut up!" I protest.

"Does he smell mouldy?" I'm then asked through the hysterics.

"Vic! Stop it!" I cry, throwing him an elbow. I know he's only kidding, but I also know he won't quit teasing me now. It's the start of what promises to be a great night. If only it could remain that way all the way through, though.

#angel reyes #angel reyes fanfiction #angel reyes smut #angel reyes imagine #angel reyes x ofc #angel reyes fanfic #angel reyes fic #vampire!angel reyes #mayans mc #mayans mc fanfiction #mayans mc smut #mayans mc imagine #mayans mc fanfic #mayans mc fic

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effervescentdragon · 1 year ago

Note

Hey anon, come here and talk to me actually, because Logan is being too nice and I absolutely won't be. I'm supposed to start studying and it's too hot and I woke up overstimulated, so I'm about to go off.

First of all, seriously, SERIOUSLY, are you telling me that you came into a werewolf au, where characters are, you know, werewolfs, and you're asking for a dub-con warning? After Logan specifically used these tags??

There is a general understanding of a certain level of reading skills that one is expected to have when reading these sort of au's (werewolf, vampire, specific creatures w their specific mythologies based off popular works, etc.) including a/b/o. Now, you can think whatever you want about omegaverse, nobody cares, but asking for dubcon warning about a consensual scene between two characters in a mate adjacent werewolf au is, honestly, fucking nitpicking as fuck according to what you personally think is dubcon and should be tagged.

I have some newsflash to you- tags are a fucking COURTESY. Courtesy. And Logan did you the courtesy of these ones, which imply certain things that are (more or less bcs again nothing is completely universal) a general consensus about how werewolf aus work. So, if you see these kind of tags and you procede with reading the fic, that's on you. That is your choice, and at any moment you can back out and stop reading.

What pisses me off IMMENSELY is the fucking entitlement that you're showing here. Let me explain that.

Not all tags are going to mean the same things to same people. Some, like Logan said, will only tag for major themes. Some will tag every single thing that can be perceived as problematic when you squint a little. Some of us, including me, will hit you with a 'Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings'. The point is, authors exercise their best judgement when tagging as a courtesy, as do the readers when they choose to proceed with the work. And I'm not saying it doesn't happen! Sometimes authors miss something that may be triggering, and when told that, they also get to choose whwther or not they will amend the tags. Just like the reader can back out of the work at any moment. There is a choice, always.

What pisses me off here is - by asking for dubcon warning on a CONSENSUAL scene in a wip you are assuming everyone has the same understanding of what dubcon is in a/b/o slash werewolf universe, which is not the case. It's obviously not the case, because if I saw dubcon tags in a werewolf au, i'd assume theres some coercion and back the fuck out before I even started the fic. I wouldn't think it would be that Pierre is kind of “wolfy” from the moon and he’s acting a bit more forward than he normally would be, but Charles guides him and agrees and we’re in Charles POV the entire time and he’s very enthusiastic about it. That's not what I would assume.

I don't like your tone, anon. And thats a personal thing, I understand that, and I know I'm angrier than I maybe should be. I don't like the implication that everything should be catered perfectly to every single person's personal hc's of how these au universes work. I don't like that this ask only tells me that you've never read a book in your life, or you'd maybe understand the notion of creative artistic expression, not having warnings for every single thing someone may somewhere perceive as an insult, and author's deliberate personal choice on how to tag or not tag certain things.

I especially don't like that you're unable to sit with your discomfort for a moment and reflect on it, and that you felt the need to come into my friend's inbox and ask to be accommodated not even a day after they posted almost 10k of their fic. Not every thought needs to be said, not everything is catered to you, and nobody on this earth is put there to make sure you personally are not discomforted in any way ever.

Basically, fuck off.

{spoiler warning for your followers maybe}

i love werewolfierre au so much but i was wondering if you would be willing to put a mildly dubious consent warning or something similar on the latest chapter for the last scene?

With the possessiveness/'wolf-ing out' thing and lack of communication/unclear state of mind for both characters it may be helpful for readers to have a little warning just to know what they may be getting into reading.

If you don't feel it is needed then of course just ignore this ask completely and I am very excited to read what comes next in this verse it is incredible!

Hi Anon,

So, first off I want to say that I am always open to people asking me to adjust tags on fic. I have done it before and will likely do it again. Part of my writing process is starting a fic and giving myself enough wiggle room to let things work themselves out. Sometimes that means the end of the fic I write isn’t what I initially started writing and I need to go back and adjust my tagging.

I also want to say that I know there’s a lot of conversation about how and why and what you should use the tagging system on ao3 for.

Tags for me mean that it’s a MAJOR theme in the fic and I feel like if I were to tag this fic as dubcon, it wouldn’t be true to the entire theme of the fic.

What I normally do in these circumstances is add a little note in the author’s note at the beginning of the chapter and say, “this chapter has xxx, please let me know if you have questions” and that seems to work.

Personally with this scene, I felt like I was very intentional with Charles’ state of mind and the way that I set this up and this is a result of the 70k slow burn that came before.

I didn’t add the note because I didn’t feel as though it was outside the realm of the total theme of the story, but I will make some adjustments moving forward.

Thank you for reading and thank you for enjoying so far! Things are about to get wild

#id apologize for ad hominem but like fuck that.#CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS PEOPLE. UTILIZE THEM #i got a complaint like this once and i guess i have some thoughts #youre not owed anything #fandom wank i guess #i should eat #werewolfierre #piarles #logan. i rly hope you dont mind this #effervescentdragonrants

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cassandraclare · 4 years ago

Text

The Whispering Room: James’ POV

Here it is finally — James’ POV of the Whispering Room scene from Chain of Gold. I wanted to wait until Chain of Iron was released to give more people a chance to read the book, and also because what we learn in COI does inform the scene. I hope you enjoy!

*art by Cassandra Jean

Cortana wove with her words, underlining each one with steel. She turned as her sword turned, and her body curved and moved like water or fire, like a river under an infinity of stars. It was beautiful—she was beautiful, but it was not a distant beauty. It was a beauty that lived and breathed and reached out with its hands to crush James’s chest and make him breathless. — Chain of Gold

James had felt a strange emotion when Daisy first took the stage at the Hell Ruelle. It was a mix of several feelings...

worry on her behalf, annoyance at Kellington, curiosity, and admiration for her bravery and poise. It was unfair of these Bohemians to force her to caper for them, and, he thought, a bit insulting to Shadowhunters in general. He supposed that Matthew had given them a rather unusual view of what the Nephilim were like in such circumstances.

And then she had begun to dance. And suddenly she was not Daisy, his old friend. She was Cordelia, whose name meant heart, whose every gesture was fire. Every earthly worry he’d had had been swept out of his mind. He was conscious only of Cordelia, whirling back and forth across the small stage. Cortana danced around her, shedding light like embers. The dull glow of the lamps illuminated her body, describing her every movement, her every curve as she danced. Her scarlet hair whipped around her in time to the music, and the golden light of the lamps in the Ruelle slipped across her skin, slow and hot, like beads of honey. The cadences of her voice, rising and falling, seemed to weave a cage of silken thread about her audience, and James was no exception.

Later, James would think it was odd that he had not compared her to Grace. Grace had never entered his mind at all. Cordelia danced, and by the end of her performance, James’s entire life had been disassembled and put back together in a new and different shape. He was conscious of Matthew, beside him, also staring as the crowd cheered, his sharp cheekbones flushed. He looked dazed; James couldn’t blame him.

Cordelia descended the stage and slipped through the crowd to come back to them, blushing at the looks and murmured comments she was drawing from the audience now. James could see the desire in the eyes that followed her. Everyone wanted her. He felt a dull fury. They had no right. They did not know Cordelia. She was more than just that dance.

When she reached them she let out a long breath of relief and smiled. She glowed with the exercise of dancing. Sweat beaded along her collarbones, shimmered between her breasts. Her eyes were bright as Cortana’s blade, strapped to her back.

“Bloody hell,” Matthew exclaimed. “What was that?”

A look of uncertainty crossed Cordelia’s face. James said, “It was a fairy tale, Math,” and Matthew nodded. His dark green eyes searched Cordelia’s face, as if looking for the key to a locked room he had only just discovered.

Cordelia looked uncertain. James couldn’t bear that. She’d been magnificent; she should know it. But he couldn’t say that, of course. It would only make her self-conscious.

“Well done, Cordelia,” James said instead; when he unfolded his arms; his wrist hurt and he wondered if he’d been clenching his hands.

Cordelia. He hadn’t called her Daisy, and she looked a little surprised. It seemed inappropriate, somehow. Daisy was Lucie’s friend, the Merry Thieves’ compatriot; he found it a smaller name than she deserved. Cordelia, though—she had been a queen, hadn’t she? Queen Cordelia, daughter of Leir, ruler of Britain before the Romans had ever landed on those shores. Like Boadicea, a legendary warrior queen. A blazing white fire behind fathomless black eyes.

“Anna has disappeared with Hypatia,” James said, noting the empty settee, “so I would call your distraction a success.”

Cordelia’s lips twitched into a smile. “How long does a seduction usually last?”

“Depends if you do it properly,” Matthew said, with a wink. James felt it as a spark of relief, a bit of lightness amid the feeling that something heavy was sitting on his chest.

“Well, I hope for Hypatia’s sake Anna does it properly,” James said. He registered, with the reflexes of a parabatai, that Matthew had gone still next to him, and wondered what was wrong. “Yet for our sake, I hope she hurries it up.”

All hint of Matthew’s jocular tone from before was gone. “Both of you,” he said urgently. “Listen.”

Did he mean all the muttering about Shadowhunters? Was he only noticing it now? It had followed them since they came into the place. But when James followed Matthew’s gaze, he found Kellington staring with an expression of vexation, not at them but at the door. All questions were answered as through the door came Charles Fairchild, looking around him with a haughty expression. He looked like was about to raid the place; so much for whatever work Matthew and Anna had done for Downworlder-Shadowhunter relations here.

Matthew narrowed his eyes. “Charles,” he sighed. “By the Angel, what is he doing here?”

Charles was, James thought, probably looking for them. He was making his way through the crowd and gazing around him. Luckily for them, the crowd was not interested in letting him through, and he was moving very slowly.

“We should go,” James said. “But we can’t leave Anna.”

In one way, at least, Charles’s arrival was helpful; it threw a bucket of cold water on the roiling heat that had gripped James’s heart since Cordelia had begun her dance. Back to the matter at hand: a demon, a Pyxis, a plan.

“You two run and hide yourselves,” Matthew said, still keeping his eyes on his brother. “Charles will go off his head if he sees you here.”

“But what about you?” said Cordelia.

Matthew shrugged, but James could see the tension in his jaw and his shoulders. “He’s used to this kind of thing from me. I’ll deal with Charles.”

Not for the first time, James wished that his parabatai wasn’t in such a hurry to sacrifice his own reputation. He exchanged a long look with Matthew, but Matthew was sure, and determined, and his desire to rush into his own humiliation was an issue that would have to wait. Nodding, he turned and caught Cordelia’s hand with his own. “This way,” he said, and she nodded back in acknowledgement. As he pulled them into the crowd he heard Matthew’s voice calling, “Charles!” in a hearty tone of pleasant, if entirely false, welcome.

James didn’t know his way around the place, and the crowd made orientating himself even more difficult, but after some trial and error he and Cordelia managed to get behind Kellington and slip into a corridor leading away. This wasn’t safe in itself, since from the main chamber one would have a clear view down the entire corridor. In fact, they were temporarily more exposed than before, and James’s hope for the hallway to take a quick turn or to contain large statuary to hide behind was quickly dashed. He continued to hold onto Cordelia’s hand, not that he needed to; she seemed to know her way better than he did.

Partway down the corridor, James caught sight of an open door — its silver plaque labeling it the entrance to THE WHISPERING ROOM. Swiftly he drew Cordelia inside, out of sight. He slammed the door behind them, causing a loud noise, but he thought it couldn’t possibly be heard over the crowd in the main chamber. Only then did he release Cordelia’s hand and take stock of their surroundings.

The room was dimly lit, but not cold: a scented fire burned in the grate, filling the space with the smell of sandalwood and roses. It was a study, he guessed, based on the gigantic walnut desk against the wall and the bookshelves opposite, but it was too richly decorated to be solely a place for studious contemplation. Phoenix feathers and dragon scales danced across the gilded wallpaper; there were no windows, but the walls were hung with patterned tapestries, the floor covered with a rug so thick James felt his boots sink into it as he moved further into the room.

Cordelia had leaned her back against the wall next to the door. Her eyes were closed and she was taking deep, full breaths, calming herself down. Cortana gleamed gold over her shoulder; the firelight gleamed a deeper gold on her skin, which seemed to take and hold its warmth. James curled his fingers in against his palm.

He wanted to touch her. He half-turned away, pretending to study the books on the wall. Any other time, he would have been fascinated by the titles. Now they seemed distant, neither immediate nor imporant. He could have sworn he heard his own heart hammering. He said, “Where did you learn to dance like that?” surprising himself with the roughness of his own voice.

His gaze snapped back to Cordelia as she opened her eyes and gave a little shrug. There was something magical about the dress she wore: it followed the shape of her own body rather than the shape of corsetry or whalebone petticoats. It slid softly against her skin as she moved, just as her dark red hair tickled the bare skin of her throat, her shoulders. “I had a dance instructor in Paris. My mother believed that learning to dance aided in learning grace in battle.”

The word grace pierced James like an icicle. He could not quite picture Grace at the moment, it was true; could not quite envision her face. He had given Grace his heart — that was an immutable fact, something he knew as he knew that two plus two equaled four. But he had to admit that at the moment his heart did not feel given. It felt like a thrumming machine inside his chest, pumping blood and heat.

“That dance,” Cordelia added with a quirk of her soft mouth that struck James like a blow to the stomach, “was forbidden to be taught to unmarried ladies. But my dance instructor did not care.”

“Well,” James said, keeping his voice steady with practiced control, “thank the Angel you were there. Matthew and I could certainly not have pulled off that dance on our own.”

Cordelia turned away from him, the smile still on her face, as though she were keeping it secret from him. She trailed her hand along the top of Hypatia’s desk. At one end was a stack of papers held down by a large copper bowl of fruit, and she brought her hand up to trace its rim.

James may have been distracted beyond the capacity for distraction he’d known before, but he was still a Shadowhunter. “Be careful,” he said warningly. “I suspect that is faerie fruit. It has no effect on warlocks—no magical effect, at least. But on humans…”

Cordelia pulled her hand back as though stung. “Surely it does not harm you if you do not eat it.”

“Oh, it does not. But I have met those who have tasted it. The say the more you have of it, the more you want, and the more you ache when you can…have no more.”

Cordelia was looking at him now, and though it took a great summoning of courage, he returned her gaze. In her dark eyes the silver and blue flames of the fireplace danced. James could not catch his breath. He had never felt this before, this breathlessness. It was like pain, but with a sweet, sharp edge. Like licking honey from a knife. He said, in a low voice, “And yet. I have always thought…is not knowing what it tastes like just another form of torture? The torture of wondering?”

The door shook on his hinges suddenly, making a clatter that made both he and Cordelia jerk their heads around to look at it. The knob was starting to turn.

Cordelia paled. “We’re not meant to be in here —“

James’s world closed down to just this: Cordelia was here, she was with him, and she looked frightened. He would do anything to stop that look on her face. He caught her in his arms, and the relief was incredible — he had not realized how much he wanted to be touching her until he was. Until he was holding her, and her strength and warmth and softness were all pressed against him, and her face was so beautiful it hurt, and her lips were parted in surprise and without another thought he kissed them.

He could feel her sharp intake of breath with his hands, clasped together at her lower back. She gasped, but did not draw back, or away — he thought he would have died if she had — she leaned into him, her full lips opening under his. She was kissing him back. He tasted honey, smelled jasmine and smoke. His hand slid up her warm cheek and into the soft fall of her hair.

Time stopped.

Cordelia’s arms were around his neck. Her lush mouth opened a little against his, and the kiss deepened. He moved his hand to the back of her neck to bring her closer. Her teeth grazed his lower lip, and he couldn’t help it; he moaned, and felt her tremble against him.

Very far away, a voice chuckled and the door closed with a soft click. This whole thing had been intended as a ruse, he knew, for the benefit of whomever was trying to get into the Whispering Room. Probably some Ruelle attendees, Downworlders most likely, who had snuck off for a rendez-vous.

Ruse accomplished, then. With intense regret, James drew back from Cordelia. Her hand, warm and soft and wonderful, was against his neck; her fingers stroked his pale white scar. Her eyes were fixed at the level of his shoulder. He could hear himself say her name — Daisy, my Daisy — instead of responding, she whispered, “I think more people are coming.”

He knew it wasn’t true. He didn’t care. He knew what she was saying: that she was asking and giving permission at once. All James’ life, he had struggled for control: control over his sudden falls into shadow, control over the dark world he could see, that was invisible to everyone else. He had worked and fought and trained for control every day, and for the first time in as long as he could remember it deserted him.

The walls he had put up burned to the ground in an instant as he caught Cordelia to him. He groaned against her mouth, his hands slipping over the silk of her dress, the hot satin of her skin. He undid the strap that held Cortana, got rid of it somehow — carefully, he hoped — and let himself fall back into delirium.

He did not ask himself why he had never felt desire like this before. He could not. He was lost in the feel of her, the incline of her waist, the flare of her hips, the rise and fall of her chest as she gasped. They were kissing wildly, uncontrolled; they fetched up against the desk, Cordelia’s back to it.

Her body bent backward in an impossible arch, her hands going behind her to brace herself. Her eyes half-closed, her head fell back, revealing the bare column of her throat. He pressed his lips there, eliciting a gasp of surprised pleasure.

His hands trailed up the sleek material of her dress — he could feel the heat of her skin through it — from her waist to the neckline of her gown. His palms followed her curves until the tips of his fingers were pressing into the bare bronze skin just above the neckline of her dress. She was sleek and soft and hot all at the same time, like nothing else he’d ever touched. He heard her whimper; she was saying his name, and his heart beat in time with her words: James, James, Jamie please.

The please undid him; shrugging off his frock coat, he caught hold of her around the waist, lifting her until she was perched on the edge of the desk. The material of her dress bunched around her knees, her thighs, as she took hold of his shirt by the starched front and kissed him. His mouth drove against hers, hot and demanding, even as he clambered onto the desk after her. She reached up her arms for him and he sank down on top of her, bracing his weight with a hand above her head.

He paused, just for a moment, looking down at her. Her scarlet hair fanned out across the desk, her eyes glazed, her full lips red from kissing. He was cradled by her body, her legs on either side of his hips, her skirt rucked up nearly to her waist. She wrapped her long, bare legs around him and he shuddered. What was in him, what he wanted, was inchoate but insistant, a force he’d never known. A yearning like hot wires in his blood, the pain-pleasurable ache of unbearable wanting that drove him to kiss her again, kiss her harder. She tangled her hands in his hair, pulling at it as he kissed her breasts, flicking his tongue over the sensitive skin until she gave a low scream and clutched at him with desperate hands.

He sank down against her and kissed her, hot and deep and hard. She arched into the kiss, her breath coming in gasps. He felt her through the thinner material of his shirt: the heat of her, the swell of her breasts against his chest, her hands smoothing over his chest, his sides.

His hands aching to touch her in kind, to find out what she liked, what made her gasp, and do it again and again . . . Nothing had ever felt like this, nothing. He’d known desire before; so he remembered, so he had believed. It turned out he had stepped into a puddle and thought it was the sea. As Cordelia moved in his arms, as her lips, he realized there was a depth to desire he hadn’t even guessed at: that it was more than just desperation, but joy and need and wanting and being wanted back. It was a fever dream, his hands sliding up under the heavy satin of her skirts, the salt-sweet taste of her skin, the soft sounds of her pleasure as she urged him closer, urged him onward, the desk seeming to spin beneath them.

He heard, as if at a great distance, the sound of the door opening. He lifted his head, saw the slim fair-hared figure in the doorway. Ice washed through his veins. Cordelia stiffened, began to scramble to sit up. No, he thought, but he couldn’t stop her, couldn’t blame her. It — whatever it had been — was over.

He slid off the desk. Already the fever was vanishing, that feeling —the glorious freedom from the burden of his own will — receding. Grasping at his control, he drew it around himself, reaching for his coat, turning to calmly meet the gaze of his parabatai.

“James?” Matthew said.

#the whispering room #james herondale #cordelia carstairs #the last hours #cassandra clare #cassandra jean #chain of gold

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victoria-daydreams · 4 years ago

Text

The Long Way Home

Chapter Five: A Summer Place

AN: Claudia is back babyyyy!!!

Trigger Warnings: none

Word Count: 1.8k

Taglist: @iloveeverything-09, @eiferundruhe, @greatscott--wrongdecade

Chapter Six: Hell Hath No Fury

Claudia's POV

This was not what I was expecting today.

Today was supposed to be another ordinary day, I just returned from the airport an hour ago after dropping my parents off, it was a lovely week of fun spending time with my parents. And at that moment, nothing felt better than falling into a deep sleep, but the weather was too nice for me to nap the day away. The sun was warm enough, watery in the way it was just before the heat of the evening, but there was a slight chill on the breeze that would make you shiver for sure once you got out of the water wet, still it was perfect swimming weather.

Underneath my umbrella, I sat in my chair sipping from my glass of lemonade absently in one hand while my other hand held the latest copy of Jet magazine. This is how a summer day should always be. Refreshing. Cool. And with Andy Williams soothing voice as background noise, god, I almost wanted to dance and laugh and smile and sing all at the same time. For once, I was glad that none of the neighborhood children were begging to play in the pool.

Everything was perfect.

And then it happened.

I was enjoying the serene moment until a sudden rush of emotions gushed up to the forefront of my consciousness. Thrill, excitement, determination, annoyance, and curiosity they all flooded my senses. I could almost feel the tingling of my powers tickling me on my fingertips. But one stood out above all of them.

Guilt.

With the slightest of movement I flicked my fingers immobilizing four out of the five men in my backyard. "Now Hank," I called out, setting down my glass and magazine on a small table next to me. "When I invited you to stop by my house whenever you please, that invitation wasn't extended to a stranger, a wanted criminal, a drug abuser, and a..." I paused, loudly sniffing the air twice. "A dog," I finished, not bothering to turn around.

"I wouldn't have brought them along if this wasn't important," Hank explained. "We need your help Claudia," he added.

"You've go to be kidding me?" I breathed, as released my telekinetic hold. I swung my legs over the side of my lounge chair and slipped on the silk robe that was on back of it. "I let the maids take off one day and look what happens," I complained, rolling my eyes before lifting the needle of my recorder player.

I rose from my seat, sliding my shoes on and with a slow sauntering gait, I walked towards the group. I was thankful for the round, oversized sunglasses that I was wearing, for the dark brown frames hid how my eyes slightly widened at Charles' appearance. Charles looked...well he looked god awful, to be honest. He had always kept himself cleanly shaved, but now he had let his facial hair grow wildly on his face, even his shortly kept brown hair had grown out. And the dark bags under his eyes, it seemed like Charles hasn't a had good night's rest in years.

And Erik, for someone that's been imprisoned underneath The Pentagon he still managed to maintain his handsome, clean shaven, and chiseled face. You would think that the roles had been reversed, that Charles was the one who had been locked up and not Erik by their appearances. Numerous thoughts and feelings threatened to flood my mind, but I didn't allow it. Not yet. I just needed to focus on how to get them to leave.

"Wow, your lady friend is smokin' hot," the silver-haired boy stated, gawking at me in my v-cut one piece swimsuit which had the sides cutout.

I stopped in front of them with my hand on my hip, looking from the unknown man with sideburns to Charles and then Erik. Slowly, I used my free hand to remove my sunglasses from my face, my eyes narrowed.

"Charles," I greeted simply, as Hank shuffled slightly.

Charles stood in shock for a moment staring at me dumbly, probably just in as much shock from seeing me after all these years and how I changed. My long, black locks no longer fell down to my shoulders, but now floated above it in thick, tight curls of my afro. My chestnut brown skin was tanned from the warm summer sun, but still as radiant as ever.

"Y-You look well," Charles complimented smiling slightly, recovering from his lapse of silence, as he stared at me.

"You look like shit," I snorted, letting out a chuckle as I folded my sunglasses up and putting them into my pocket "The years haven't been kind to you have they?" I asked rhetorically, folding my arms together. "Tell me Charles, are you happier now that I'm gone?" I asked mockingly. "It sure doesn't seem like it," I added, really laying it on thick.

"Claudia, we are not here for this," 'Sideburns' grumbled.

I tuned my head slightly to the man, leveling him with a venomous look,"I'm sorry, but who the hell are you?" I questioned, arching a brow.

My eyes scanned over the man's appearance, he was a little more than six feet tall, and was probably in his early or mid thirties. He had to be military or ex-military because he was built like a soldier, his muscles seemed to be harder than a tree from the way his clothes clung to him. Dark brown sideburns came down his face which reached his cheeks along with a five o'clock shadow. Anger seemed to ooze out of this man's pores. I knew he could take care of his self in a fight if such an event were to ever occur.

"My name is Logan," he answered, his blue eyes burning like two hot coals as he stared into mine.

"Are you sure it's not Dog?" I asked, a wry grin appearing on my lips as I watched this man's jaw clench. "You know with the sideburns the similarities are...uncanny," I stated, shaking my head and focusing my attention to Hank who was next to me, and was about to open his mouth. "I could call the authorities you know?" I said, cutting Hank off. "Erik's bounty would fetch a substantial payout," I noted, tapping my index finger on my cheek, thinking.

"You seem to be getting on well enough as it is," Erik replied, flicking his chin out in regards to my home.

I raised my eyebrow, "So why settle for less?" I asked cheekily.

He scoffed in disbelief, "You would actually sell me out?" Erik asked, crossing his arms.

"I'm just doing my patriotic duty Erik," I answered, raising my hands up and shrugging.

"Claudia," Hank called softly, and I looked back over to him. "I know that you have every reason to be upset right now, but please hear us out," Hank pleaded.

"We need your help Claudia," Logan stated.

"Then go hire a maid," I retorted, waving him off.

Logan growled in frustration, "Do you know how much trouble we been through just to break Erik out of the Pentagon and now to get you?" he asked, furrowing his brows.

I slid my hands into my robe pockets, "Sounds like a personal problem," I replied, shrugging again. "I didn't force you to do any of this," I pointed out with a grin.

Logan's hand clenched itself in a tight fist, "Listen lady, I've had-" He gritted out.

"No, you listen!" I interrupted, stepping closer to him. "I don't know who the hell you think are to think that you can waltz into my backyard and start making demands of me," I sassed, looking Logan up and down. I stepped in front of Hank and put a hand on his shoulder. "Hank, under any other circumstance I would be happy to see you, or even help you. But due to the fact that there are some..." I trailed, looking back at Erik and Charles. "Undesirable individuals with you," I continued, focusing my attention back to Hank. "If I were to join this little party of yours it would never work. You see Hank, I live a very comfortable life now and I'm not giving it up for the likes of them," I finished, shaking my head.

"But it's not for them Claudia, it's for humanity itself. We're trying to save the world," Hank explained, giving me a pleading look.

"Hmmm," I hummed, a sardonic smile on my lips as I shook my head again. "Funny, they said the same thing in 1962," I remembered. "Truly Hank, it was nice to see you after all these years," I smiled, giving his shoulder a reassuring squeeze before removing my hand and turning to face the men behind me. "But, it's time for you and your guests to leave. You have overstayed your welcome," I said, gesturing to the backyard gate. "Safe travels," I added, spinning on my heel and moving past Hank toward my backdoor.

"You're just going to let her go?" I heard Logan ask. "To hell with this," he grumbled.

"Logan don't-"

I went to take another step forward, but a calloused hand roughly grabbed my wrist, spinning me around and making our bodies bump into each other.

"We're not going anywhere until you fully hear us out!" Logan exclaimed, as I glared at him. "I'm not sure what it is about you that makes Charles and Erik so subdue, but I'm not them. I'm not afraid of you!" he announced, keeping his grip tight around my wrist.

Instinctively, my free hand bawled itself into a fist cloaked in a violet aura as a scowl made its way onto my face.

"Uhh...mister her hand is glowing," The silver-haired boy informed, as I swung a powerful blow to Logan's jaw, his body crumpling on the lawn.

"They're not scared, they just know better," I corrected, spreading my fingers out and the aura spread from my hand to encasing Logan's limbs. Forcefully, I planted my foot down onto Logan's chest, tilting my head as I looked down at him. "But you? Why in the world would you be? I'm nothing to be afraid of, as you can obviously tell. I'm far too small to be any threat to a big, strong man like you," I mocked, pressing my foot down even harder and Logan glared daggers at me.

"Claudia-" Charles began, but I just lifted one finger silencing him.

"Typically, I wouldn't be opposed to ripping your limbs off right now," I explained, stretching my fingers out slightly and Logan grunted at the modest tugs at his extremities. "But, I would hate to get this freshly mowed lawn all bloody. One of the neighborhood boys worked so hard on it," I commented. "Now, like I said before, it's time for you to go," I enunciated slowly, hoping that it would get through that thick skull of his.

I removed my foot from Logan's chest, shooting him one more glare before I walked to the backdoor. As I opened the backdoor to my home I released my hold on Logan's appendages.

"Wow Charles, you sure know how to pick them," Logan drawled sarcastically.

And with a wave of my hand I forcefully shut the door behind me.

Chapter Seven: A Woman Scorned

#x-men fanfiction #black fanfiction #x-men fanfic #charles xavier fanfiction #charles xavier x oc #black!oc #magneto x oc #charles xavier #erik lehnsherr fanfiction #erik lehnsherr x oc #erik lehnsherr x reader #charles xavier x reader #black!reader #x men fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic

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melanielocke · 3 years ago

Text

Love will tie the Tourniquet

After some very valid criticism of the Sanctuary scene and the very limited canon Thomastair content I figured I’d write a scene where they talk it out and Thomas apologizes. I wrote this rather quickly and didn’t edit much so sorry for any mistakes.

Title is from “Tourniquet” by Breaking Benjamin which is definitely an Alastair song (although I find the lyrics difficult to interpret). I think it’s from the POV of someone who is struggling with something and realize love won’t fix them, but also believe nothing will. Love will tie the tourniquet and suffocate me.

CW for period typical racism and homophobia, implied PTSD, mentions of bullying

Alastair was surprised to hear someone knock on the door. His mother was still on bedrest and wouldn’t be receiving any visitors and certainly no one would want to see him. He opened the door to see Thomas Lightwood in the door, hatless as always, snow had fallen in his hair. Even covered in snow Thomas was a beautiful sight to behold. Alastair tried to stop staring, but wasn’t quite sure how. Why was he here, after everything? Alastair had taken his time to think through what happened, but had arrived at the same conclusion, it was impossible. In retrospect, he wasn’t even sure Thomas liked him that much. Like Charles, he probably just saw someone who could fulfill his needs. After all, Thomas had seemed quite disappointed when Alastair had refused to take things any further than kissing in the Sanctuary.

‘Good afternoon,’ Thomas said awkwardly after a silence. ‘Can I come in? I… I thought we should talk.’

A bit hesitant, Alastair let him in and took his coat. He asked Risa to make them some tea, and brought Thomas into the parlor.

‘What did you want to talk about?’ Alastair asked.

‘I wanted to apologize,’ Thomas said.

Alastair frowned. ‘Why? You have nothing to apologize for.’

‘I do,’ Thomas said. ‘I was angry with you because of that rumor, but that gave me no right to publicly humiliate you. I treated you terribly, and you didn’t deserve that.’

Alastair wasn’t sure what to make of this. It had hurt, badly, the way Thomas had spoken to him, but he’d told himself over and over again that this what he deserved.

‘Didn’t I?’ Alastair asked. ‘I was awful at school, perhaps less so to you, but still. I can’t imagine why you’d even want to be around me.’

‘Because I forgive you,’ Thomas said.

Alastair stared at him, eyes wide. He tried to hold back the tears, but wasn’t sure he could.

‘Why? Why would you forgive me? I thought you hated me.’

Thomas looked confused. ‘After the Sanctuary? After we kissed?’

Alastair sighed. ‘Charles kissed me many times, we did more than that, and he didn’t love me. He just thought I was convenient and I could fulfill his needs.’

It had been mostly about sex with Charles, and it had taken him so long to realize that it didn’t have to be like that. He’d given Charles everything he could, hoping that perhaps someday he’d receive love and affection back.

Thomas’ mouth fell open. ‘You… you thought I would be like that? That I only wanted you for physical intimacy? Why would you think that?’

‘What else was I supposed to think?’ Alastair snapped, trying but failing to hold back the tears. ‘You wanted to kiss me only moments after you said I deserved to be hated. And because I wanted you, because I love you, I gave in. You wanted to keep me a secret, you were ashamed of liking me, so ashamed you couldn’t tell anyone, not even people who would not mind that you liked men. Just like Charles.’

I couldn’t have told them how I felt about you. Thomas’ words echoed in his head, and it was worse than Charles being ashamed of liking men. At least he understood Charles’ fears, even when it did not justify how badly Charles had treated him.

‘I never meant… I never wanted to hurt you. I’m sorry, and I said some stupid things. But I don’t want to keep you secret. There were so many things I should have said to you then, and I’m sorry I messed it up so badly. You do not deserve to be hated and I should never have said otherwise.’

Alastair wasn’t sure how much more he could take. He was desperate for affection, always had been, that was why he’d given so much to Charles, but how could he be sure Thomas wasn’t going to be the same?

‘Why not? Did I not cause you and your family terrible pain?’

Alastair was crying now and to his surprise Thomas came to sat down next to him, awkwardly putting his hands around him. Alastair pushed him away.

‘Please… please don’t.’

Thomas backed away as if he’d been burnt.

‘Physical affection isn’t easy,’ Alastair tried to explain.

He wasn’t used to hugging or even being touched at all in a non sexual way. Cordelia tried often to show her affection physically and he was grateful, but it just didn’t always work for him. Sometimes a touch could burn, be so overwhelming he only got worse.

‘What do you need?’ Thomas asked. ‘How can I help?’

‘Just keep talking,’ Alastair said. ‘Please. Tell me how you really feel. Be honest with me. If you… If you don’t really love me, it’s alright. I just need to know. Because I don’t understand anymore. Do I deserve to be hated? To be loved? I don’t get it.’

Thomas hesitated. ‘I was wrong. I was grieving and I was pushing these feelings away and I took it all out on you. But that was no excuse. You do not deserve to be hated, not when you regret what you did so much, and you do not deserve to be treated the way we… the way I treated you. And I’m so sorry. I think I do love you, I just never knew what to do with those feelings so I hid them. But I’m not going to hide anymore. I’m not ashamed of loving you.’

Alastair wiped the tears from his eyes. ‘Are you serious?’

‘I told Christopher, and he took it well. Or, well, he said he already knew and was under the assumption everyone already knew and we just didn’t talk about it. And I told my parents and Eugenia.’

Alastair hesitated. ‘Did you tell them I like men?’

‘No,’ Thomas said quickly. ‘Just about me, and how I feel. And that I’d at least like to have you as a friend, even if you weren’t interested in more.’

‘And your family, they accepted you?’

‘They were very kind and supportive, although my mother did say I might be worse at this whole romance thing than my father.’

Alastair frowned. ‘What did your father do?’

Thomas laughed, and Alastair could only think how beautiful his laugh was, how it lit up his face. ‘As you know, my mother was a servant before she became a shadowhunter, and my father decided to regularly ask her for scones, which he doesn’t like, so he could see her when she brought them. He then hid them under his bed.’

Alastair burst out laughing. He knew he shouldn’t, he knew he had no right to laugh about the people he’d brought such shame to, but at the same time he couldn’t imagine this happening. If Gideon Lightwood disliked scones so much, why not ask for literally anything else?

‘He also accidently blurted out his intentions of marrying my mother in her presence before he even proposed,’ Thomas added. ‘I’m not sure which part is worse, but it does make for good stories.’

‘I’d say the scones are worse,’ said Alastair, taking a sip from his tea.

‘You’re very beautiful,’ Thomas said suddenly. ‘When you laugh. Also when you don’t laugh, but I like seeing you laugh. You always seem so sad.’

Alastair looked Thomas in the eye. ‘Really? You think I’m beautiful?’

‘Of course I do, who wouldn’t? I love your hair now that you’ve dyed it back to black.’

Alastair felt the tears coming back, and Thomas looked startled. ‘Did I say something wrong?’

‘No, it’s just… No one has told me I’m beautiful. And no one has told me they like my hair. It wasn’t an easy decision to dye it back. I didn’t want to pretend to be something I’m not anymore, but I thought everyone preferred the blonde.’

‘I’ve always liked dark hair, and it suits you well. And I’m glad you’re more comfortable with it. I guess I have no idea what it’s like, to be judged for the color of your hair or your skin.’

‘That’s the second part of what happened at the academy, what I hadn’t told you yet,’ Alastair said sadly. ‘No one there looked like me. They latched onto the rumors about my father, of course but they also treated me differently for being Persian, made fun of my features, my language… I thought it would get better if I adapted more to what they wanted.’

‘Alastair, I’m so sorry,’ Thomas said, reaching out his hand as if to touch him, but retreating. He probably remembered Alastair’s warning, but right now he did want to be touched. Now he knew Thomas did care for him, even if he had an odd way of showing it sometimes.

So Alastair leaned into him, resting his head against Thomas’ chest. It was comforting to feel his chest rise and fall with his breath. Perhaps he did like to be touched sometimes, but only if the other person loved him. There were very few people who did, and Alastair wasn’t so certain if Cordelia loved him anymore.

‘Is this alright?’ Thomas asked, putting a hand around him.

‘It is. It’s actually nice. But Tom, how can we make this work, if your friends still hate me?’

‘Christopher doesn’t,’ Thomas said. ‘He is willing to give you a chance. All you have to do is help him out with his experiments, show some interest, and he’ll like you. Lucie is going to adore you, I’m sure of it. As for James and Matthew… I’m not sure, but they don’t get to decide who I like or don’t like. For so long I tried to hate you out of loyalty to Matthew, but ultimately that’s his issue and not mine.’

‘But what if you lose your friends because of me?’ Alastair asked. ‘I would never want you to lose people you love for me.’

Thomas put his hand in Alastair’s hair, and Alastair thought about how Thomas had said he loved his hair. He’d never considered someone might. Charles had certainly preferred his hair blonde. He had been the one to suggest dyeing it.

‘That would be their loss,’ Thomas said. ‘You deserve to be loved too, Alastair. I will tell James and Matthew when they get back, and if they decide not to accept it, then perhaps they’re not very good friends.’

Alastair was surprised to hear him say that. He’d thought the four boys were exceptionally close, the kind of friendship he longed for but never had.

‘That’s what my mother said,’ Thomas added.

Alastair frowned. ‘Do your parents know I spread that rumor? Surely they would not accept you pursuing me if they knew?’

‘I told them,’ Thomas said. ‘But my father said that when he was young, he’d done worse. He realized he was wrong and changed, uncle Gabriel too. He said it would be hypocritical to hold this against you.’

‘Really?’

‘So far they seem to like you,’ Thomas said. ‘And they are very grateful that you made sure to keep me safe. And… I am too. I never thanked you, but I should have. I am grateful that you put so much effort into protecting me. But please do not risk your life like that again. I would never forgive myself if you died trying to keep me safe.’

‘Only if you promise never to do something as reckless as those patrols again,’ Alastair said. ‘Someone had to keep you safe, and I certainly wasn’t going to let you die because of your own recklessness. Because I love you.’

They sat like that for a while, Alastair taking in the sensation of being held. He didn’t remember ever receiving such affection, and wasn’t quite sure what to make of it.

‘I’m not going to patrol alone again,’ Thomas said. ‘I promise.’

‘Then I won’t follow you as you patrol alone either,’ Alastair said. He paused. ‘I never expected you to come back for me. I never thought you could love me.’

‘I do. I loved you since Paris,’ Thomas said. ‘I mean, at school I liked you as well, but I thought you it was daring that you said whatever you wanted. I saw your sadness too, but not the real you. Not like in Paris.’

‘I certainly did not say whatever I wanted,’ Alastair said softly. ‘I said what I thought I had to so they wouldn’t hurt me.’

‘I can’t even imagine how badly they must have hurt you,’ Thomas said softly.

Soothing words eased some of the pain, but not all of it. Alastair wasn’t sure if it ever would. Love would tie the tourniquet. It might suffocate him. He would have to find another way to starve the pain within, if such a thing were possible.

‘You were treated badly as well, I’m sure you have some idea.’

‘Yes, but you were always nicer to me than to the others, and I think that shielded me from the others as well. Are you going to be alright, Alastair? I want to help you, but I’m not sure I know how.’

‘I have no idea,’ Alastair admitted. ‘But I’m going to try. You make me want to try. I have no idea how though.’

He knew he needed to get better, if he wanted this to work, to find a way to heal from everything that had happened to him. He knew he couldn’t depend on one person to heal him like he had with Charles, someone who had ultimately broken whatever was left of his heart.

‘Perhaps you could talk to uncle Jem,’ Thomas suggested. ‘If anyone can help with that, it’s him.’

Alastair hadn’t considered that. His cousin thought he hated him. He’d reached out once, back when Alastair had attended the Academy, and he’d pushed him away like he did everyone else. He wasn’t sure Jem would still be willing to help him after everything. But perhaps he could try. Perhaps it didn’t always have to be like this.

#Alastair Carstairs #Thomas Lightwood #the last hours #tlh #chain of gold #chain of iron #tsc

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mrs-cavill-wife · 3 years ago

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Forbidden Witch (2/?)

Pairing: Charles Brandon X Female Reader

Warning: Fantasy. Language. Forbidden Love. Tell me if I miss something.

Author's Note: This one is REALLY long chapter but here comes Charles Brandon, calm your tits! Hope you guys like it, if you do, please reblog it! I'm all ears to feedback and suggestions, thank you! DM or comment if you want to be on tag lists of Forbidden Witch!

Tag List: @lexyvaldez26 @thereisa8ella @natura1phenomenon @mrsavery @number1chonie @themanfromu @littlefreya @legendarywizarddetective @lovingbearherringhairdo @zealoushound @deangal-101 @everydaymultifandom @summersong69 @jgtfvhsg @tellingyouastory @sillyrabbit81 @nuggsmum @pussyverson @oh-for-fic-sake @foodieforthoughts @fanficlover91 @r-t-doll @its--fandom--darling @poledancingdinos @hlkwrites @rmtndew

Riding for a few minutes, the boy was fun, he had many stories but I was grateful when he stopped chattering. I think this adventure exhausted him.

We arrived in Aluma and it was not difficult to find the castle, in a short time, we were well in freight for the construction. Aretuza was a beautiful place, but I had never seen such a magnificent castle, it was big, people were probably lost there. I approached the entrance and came across three soldiers, who immediately aimed the spears at me.

"Stop! Who's coming over there?"

I looked at them alerting them to stay quiet and I got off the horse slowly, the little prince was already asleep and I didn't want to find him. I think almost turning into monster food was a great experience, he needed to rest.

"Tsc-tsc. I don't think that's how you supposed to treat a lady. Especially when she saved and is in charge of the safety of her future king."

One of them approached to look closely and then looked at the others.

"Go, fast! Let your majesties know, Prince Eric has been found."

One of them ran inside the door, faster than a fox and I, even with the little boy, still had to wait outside. I looked at the blondie, and he slept soundly, hugging my Atlas, as if je were the most comfortable of the mattresses. Which is probably something he must have. Based on the aesthetics of the Castle, they must have everything from the good and the best, and even more.

"Eric! My little warrior!"

A voice, clearly desperate, screamed and, faster than her guard, the queen approached. A beautiful lady, blonde, thin but with curves, a beautiful green dress with gold details that matched with her hazel eyes and, of course, a simple but remarkable crown with rubies on the top of her head.

She approached me and the little boy, affectionately touching her face and then brushing her hair with her fingers. Her features were clear, pure happiness, relief and tears that I think, have been there since the little boy ran away. Eric woke up quickly with his mother touch and smiled softly, still tired.

She grabbed the boy, without caring about his soaked clothes, giving him a giant bear hug while sobbing.

"Oh my little prince, why? You know how worried your Mom is when you run away like that."

She said now looking at him with teary red eyes. I have to admit I felt bad for her.

"I think I'll have to put soldiers in to watch you again"

Again? Yeah, he didn't lie, and by the nickname "little warrior", I think he was really a little adventurer and a big runaway kid.

"Mom, I'm sorry and I'm fine. The witch saved me. Without her, I would be monster dinner right now."

Said the little troublemaker and after the brief moment of mother and son, the queen noticed me, gave a big smile and I bowed in respect, but she soon shook her head and held my hand.

"You, my young lady, no need to bow. You saved my son, my greatest treasure, you don't know how grateful I am. What's your name?"

I didn't knew exactly what to say. I looked at Eric and he just smiled comforting me.

"Oh.. your majesty.. I'm Cassandra, Cassandra of Boudicca.. and I just.. I just did what any sensible person would do."

"One way or another, me and your majesty, the king, we are very grateful, and by the way the king would love to meet you."

Meet me? Oh Lord, I can't say no to a queen, right? She's being so sweet with me but I'm even dressed properly to meet a king?

"My queen.. I.. well.."

"No no, I'll be offended if you refuse"

I sighed and nodded. The soldiers led the way and the queen took me into the huge castle, holding my right hand and with her son by the side, but within minutes he ran into a room with large wooden doors, apparently the throne room.

I thought we would get in there but the queen is still walking and I had no choice but to follow. We arrived at a door, it was opened and it was a beautiful room, with a huge bed that would probably fit three people, a nice balcony, a dressing table, a shelf with some books. The queen took me to the room on, had a huge mirror, a beautiful bathtub, prepared with some foam and next to it, a black girl with a simple dress, braided hair and a beautiful smile.

"This is Juliette, one of my chaperones, she's a wonderful lady, she will help you bathe and get ready."

The lady Juliette bowed at me and I looked surprised at the queen.

"Your majesty, that's not necessary, I.."

She cutted me before I could say something more.

"Darling, you can call me Madeline and maybe it's not necessary but I asked my man to treat your beautiful horse and I think you need too, besides.."

She grabbed a little cloth and gently rubbed under my nose wiping it. Something a mother would do. And I saw a little of blood when she pull away the cloth. Fire spells always consume a lot of my strength, occasionally, my nose would start bleeding and on the worst situation, I would pass out.

"..You look very exhausted, please, let my lady help you.."

Alright, maybe I need it and won't hurt, right?

I nodded causing the Queen and her lady to smile widely at me.

"Huh.. At least, lady Juliette, can she let me take care of my bath? By myself, please? I don't want to be disrespectful to your kindly, but I'm not used to undressing in front of anyone."

The queen smiled softly and nodded at Juliette and soon, she were our of bathroom.

"Darlin, one question. What's your favorite color?"

"Black!?"

I answered a little confused and she left me alone in the bathroom. I undressed and went into the warm water.

I would not feel comfortable naked in someone's presence, at all, even if I were a man.. I imagine that some people think I can be experient, I admit that I have a beautiful body, at least I think that I'm beautiful, attracts many masculine looks, I have been courted but always by men who saw me with a piece of meat or out of curiosity to know what spell a witch knows how to do between four walls. Pathetic.

The truth is that I have never been with a man, I have never fallen in love. When I was younger, I used to imagine what my future husband would be like. I imagined your details, I remember everything I liked.. He would be a tall man, defined body, fair, strong, sweet, romantic, noble, fair skin, blue eyes like the sky in a spring morning, dark hair like the night, short or maybe curly, lips chubby that would always leave me wanting more, hands that when..

Oh my God, stop Cassandra, you're not a teen anymore.. and it's not going to happen.

I blew away those stupid thoughts and got up from bathtub, grabbed a towel and wrapped around my body. When i arrived on room, I meet Lady Juliette, holding a box and next to her, on the bed, a simple, but for my eyes, a really gorgeous black dress.

"Oh my God, that's..?"

Lady Juliette laughed softly and opened the box, revealing a necklace.

"The queen want you to wear this for tonight. She thought you would like the style and it's also a gift for saving her son"

I don't wanted to sounds dramatic but it's beautiful, the dress, the necklace. I grabbed the dress and ran back to bathroom to get dressed. I admired myself on the mirror for a second and quickly, Juliette was behind me, helping me with the necklace.

"By your smile, I see you approved. The queen will love to know. Your majesties await for you on the throne room, I'll lead the way."

I nodded and followed Juliette to the throne room

Charles Brandon POV

Another beautiful morning. I woke up and rubbed my eyes, yawned getting up and wearing a shirt. I went to the window, opened the curtains and let the sunlight in. Oh, fresh air. Honestly, I could not have chosen a better place to be my home, in freight to a beautiful and immense river, around the splendid nature, far from the city, that noise makes me crazy, horses running, people screaming, songs out of tune, poor people begging for help and old "relationships" knocking on my door. That's peace right here.

I looked to the side. Seeing my wife, Phoebe and my little princess, my daughter Mackenzie. Christ, she is growing up so fast, she is only six years old now but she is a very smart little girl, loves to read, write and draw. She is the most special thing in the world for me.

I remember when Phoebe told me she was pregnant, four weeks after our wedding. I have always been a man who lives in the present, the now. But at that moment, I cared about the future, about me, about being a better man, something I never was and my wife suffered a lot from it, she would pretend to don't mind sleeping all alone almost every night, pretended not see me arriving late, often drunk, lipstick and sweat on my skin. Today I don't like to talk but, loyalty was never on my list of tasks, not before Phoebe give me someone so innocent, so sweet and pure, someone who depended on me. There's a Charles Brandon before Mackenzie, and another Charles Brandon after Mackenzie, and long before that, long before I met Phoebe, I was just a farmer's son.

How do I become Duke? Well, I was always in love with horses and swords, my father died when I was little and my mother was a queen's lady. I practically lived in the castle because of my mother's work, and this work, gave me a chance to see the soldiers training, fighting, riding, I just loved it and the captain ended up realizing my admiration, despite my young age, I became a helper, simply started carrying things, gave a little help with the horses. My dedication took me far, in a short time I cleaned the armor and then I was sharpening and testing the swords and when I really became a man, after my mother died of natural causes, with the blessing of King Edward, I became knights, soldier, one of the best.

Going to war was incredible for me, it seems sick but I liked to cut off heads, tear apart, see blood and defend the kingdom that treated me like a son. King Edward had a best friend, a king from a distant continent. King Alexander. On one of his visits, there was a feast, and that's when we met. That same night, there was an ambush in the castle and unfortunately, the king in which I served since I was a child, was murdered, as well as several soldiers, I remained standing, even injured and saved King Alexander.

After all that, King Edward gave me a lot of support. He knew it was a big loss for me, I lost a lot of friends and he knew that King Alexander was almost like a father to me. He knew of my dedication and love for the royal guard, for being a soldier and he invited me to be part of his soldiers. I was reluctant but after thinking a lot, I really had nothing else, nothing to lose so, the next day, I am already on my way to Aluma, his kingdom. There I met his wife, he told me they were trying to have a baby, they hoped it was a boy, an heir, I honestly, I always thought it was bullshit but I wouldn't say that, I was treated like a son.

For a few years, I exercised my place in the royal guard, I became a captain, and of course, the title attracted several lovers. Redheads, brunettes, blondes, fair skin, black skin, a whole meal full of colors and tastes.. each dawn I got up from a different bed, and "finally", I met Phoebe, a young lady, from a noble family. At first, it was just a carnal thing but it ended up becoming a passion, and soon, we were married. Being a captain, having a wife and being a party boy. My favorite things in life, but they were colliding. Phoebe suffered from wondering if I would return alive from a battle and the other night, she slept alone while I had fun with some harlot. It got to the point where I realized that it couldn't be like that anymore, I had affection for the woman who woke up more than I want in me, so I made the decision to relinquish my post as captain of the royal guard. King Alexander tried to insist that I stay, it's true that we ended up becoming great friends but he ended up understanding my decision.

As a thank you for years of loyalty to him and his best friend, he gave me a title and his best builders would build my home, wherever I wanted. I chose, Sullfolk, a beautiful continent, full of nature. I became Charles Brandon, the Duke of Sullfolk.

"Daddy?"

I leave my daydreams of the past, hearing that sweet voice of my dear Mackenzie. I looked at the bed and saw her with a sleepy face and a smile in my direction. I walked over, sitting next to her on the bed and placing a kiss on her messy hair.

"Good morning, sunshine. how did my little princess sleep?"

"Good daddy, are we traveling today, right?"

I laughed softly nodding at her. Since King Alexander sent a letter, inviting me and my family to Aluma, my little Mackenzie is not holding on to happiness, she would ask me every night, "When are we going? It's closer daddy?".

It would be her first trip, she would know the place of my stories that she loved to hear. It would be a visit, it had been a few years since Alexandre and I had seen each other and he said he would prepare a banquet, talk about the old days, it would be fun for my family, a chance for Mackenzie to know a new place and Phoebe would review the place where he was born. In fact, we were all in stasis.

"I'll get ready and tell our servants to put our breakfast. Wake up your mother and meet me in the dining room. After we eat, we go to the road."

She smiled widely causing me the same action of affection and I left the room.

#henrycavill rp #henry cavill x female reader #charles brandon x you #charles brandon x reader #charles brandon #henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader

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echotrinityme · 3 years ago

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Regretful Chapter 9: Let Me Love You

After Rupert's outburst, his and Henry's relationship has been strained. Henry was avoiding Rupert at all cost, and that hurt Rupert. Rupert tried to call or text him but received no response. Everytime he saw Henry in the base, Henry would immediately bolt to a different direction.

Rupert felt so much guilt and regret for blowing up at him, he didn't mean the words he said about Henry. He was angry at the fact that Calvin kissed him and it wasn't him that was doing that to him. He either spent training or in his tent, away from everyone else to brood or contemplate his life choices.

One day while in his tent, he was sitting on his bed, playing with his pocketknife when Victoria walked in. She smiled at him and he smiled back but didn't reach his eyes, she sat next to him and patted his back to comfort him.

"How are you doing?" she asked, softly.

"Terrible." replied Rupert, lowly.

"I can tell."

"I feel so guilty. And I know I deserved it but I didn't mean to hurt him."

"Have you tried to explain?"

"Yeah but he wouldn't listen."

Rupert put down his pocketknife and put his hat down to hide his face, he was trying hard not to cry. Victoria felt pity and sadness for him, she knew Rupert felt guilty about hurting Henry. He said those things in a fit of repressed anger cause of Charles' death. She also knew Rupert and Henry were the ones that Charles' death hit the most.

"Hey, it will be all right." reassured Victoria, gently.

"How?" questioned Rupert, his tone still low.

"Henry can't stay mad at you, forever."

"Yeah, I guess."

Rupert sighed heavily and lifted his head to look at Victoria, "But this wouldn't have happened if I wasn't so jealous."

Victoria on the outside looked surprised but on the inside she was not, she had suspected Rupert was jealous and now her suspicions are now confirmed.

"Do you love Henry?" asked Victoria, gingerly.

"Uh...I." replied Rupert, hesitantly.

"Do your days feel better when with him?"

"Yes."

"Are you attractive to him?"

"Yes."

"Do you fantasize about him?"

"Ye-What the fuck, Victoria!?"

Victoria laughed at Rupert's reaction whose face was red in embarrassment, he never expected Victoria to ask that question. Yes, he fantasize about Henry...a lot. It also didn't help he had wet dreams about him which made him more red.

"Quit it." muttered Rupert.

"I'm sorry, it's just so funny to see your reaction." giggled Victoria.

"Please, don't tell anyone about this." pleaded Rupert.

"I promise."

"Ok."

They both stopped talking and just sat silently. Rupert exhaled sharply and he got out his phone to check his notifications, still no word from Henry. He groaned in frustration and he got up, startling Victoria in the process. He went to the entrance of his tent but Victoria stopped him.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"Out." replied Rupert, tone clipped.

"Ok. Will you be okay?"

"Yeah."

Victoria let Rupert go but after a moment, she forget to mention to him about her mission to get him and Henry together.

Rupert was walking out the base and as he was walking, he stumbled onto the town that was near the base. He was walking around the town when he spotted a jewelry store, he peeked at the window and saw a black choker with a blue sapphire jewel at the center. It was so beautiful and perfect for Henry.

He contemplated for a moment, he misses Henry and he wants him back. He made a decision and went inside the store.

Meanwhile with Henry, he was in his bedroom crying and hugging himself. He was laying down and staring up at his ceiling, his head pounded and his eyes stung from the excessive sobbing. He groaned in sadness and got up to go get aspirin, he went to the bathroom to get the pills.

Henry's POV

My head hurts, I feel like crap. I'm tired of crying and I hate feeling vulnerable.

I thought my heart couldn't get more broken but I was wrong. Ever since Rupert's anger outburst, I had been avoiding him. I even been ignoring his texts and calls, I can't face him...not now.

I took the aspirin and went back to my bed, I lay back down again and stared up at my ceiling. I sighed sadly and began to close my eyes until I heard a knock on my door. I groaned in anger and went to answer the door, when I opened my door and saw the last person I want to see right now.

It was Rupert.

Rupert's POV

After I went to the jewelry store, I headed back to the base. I held an item in my right hand and put in my pocket.

Once I got back to the base, I waved to a couple of people and took out my phone to try to contact him again but decided to just go ever to his place.

I headed over to his place quickly and ascended the stairs to his apartment door, I knocked on the door and waited like a minute when he opened the door.

He did not look happy to see me...not that I don't blame him.

No One's POV

Henry stared at Rupert for a moment and glared at him, before he can shut the door on him, Rupert stopped him with his hand and boot on the door. He gave Henry a pleading look, he needed to talk to Henry.

Henry saw the sadness and remorseful on Rupert's face, Henry felt pity but was still angry and heartbroken at him. Henry contemplated for a few minutes and decided to let Rupert in, he led Rupert to his couch and they both sat on the couch.

There was a heavy silence and the tension was so thick, you can cut it with a knife. Henry refused to look at Rupert while Rupert kept staring at him, he knew he screwed up badly. Rupert cleared his throat and Henry glanced at him blankly.

"I'm sorry for hurting you." started Rupert, his voice wavered. "I didn't mean to hurt you like that."

Henry was listening and observing Rupert's body language, he was trembling, he was clutching his fists, and trying hard not to cry.

"I took my grief out on you." he continued. "It's not your fault that Charles is dead."

"But..." spoke Henry, softly. He was finally using his voice, making Rupert's eyes widened.

"Oi." said Rupert, gently. He grabbed Henry to hug him before Henry can protest. "It's not your fault, it's the Toppats."

Henry leaned into Rupert's chest and he began to sob, Rupert hugged him tightly while he cried. Rupert felt his eyes blurred with tears and he also started sobbing.

They kept on hugging and sobbing, Rupert was whispering apologizes to Henry and whispering comfort words.

They both ceased sobbing and they both wiped their eyes. They both sighed heavily, Rupert cleared his throat making Henry look at him.

"Are ya ok? Are ya still mad at me?" asked Rupert, softly and gently.

"Yeah and no, I'm not mad at you." replied Henry.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"But I hurt you, real badly."

"It's fine...I don't blame you. You're just grieving like I am."

While Henry was talking, Rupert was listening to his voice. He never realized that Henry's voice was so...soothing.

Henry was never a talker, he has selective mutsim and prefer using sigh language to talk. However, he opened up and began to talk more.

"Yeah." said Rupert. He needed to tell Henry why he was angry in the first place.

"Oi, there's an another reason why I blew up at you."

"Oh, what is it?"

Rupert turned away from Henry, he was nervous about telling him the truth. Henry noticed Rupert's anxious state and raised an eyebrow at him.

"I...was...jealous." mumbled Rupert.

"What?" said Henry, quizzically.

"I was jealous." replied Rupert, firmly.

"Jealous? Of who or what?"

"I was jealous of Calvin for kissing you."

Henry was confused for a moment until he felt his face became warm, Rupert's face also became warm. It's now or never, he supposed.

"I have feelings for you." admitted Rupert, softly.

"Oh."

Henry bowed his head down, not letting Rupert see his red face. Rupert mistakenly took that as a rejection, "It's ok, if you don't feel the way same way." said Rupert, sadly.

"I still want to be friends with you." he continued. "It's fine."

Rupert was rambling until he felt a hand on his cheek, he turned to see Henry looking at him and smiled.

"I have feelings for you, too." whispered Henry.

Before Rupert can say anything, Henry leaned forward and kissed him. Rupert's eyes widened but pretty soon, he closed his eyes and kissed him back.

Henry's hand was still on Rupert's cheek and Rupert wrapped his arms around Henry's waist. They kept kissing until they stopped to breathe, then they went back to kissing.

Their tongues fought for dominance while they both moaned in pleasure, Henry wrapped his arms around Rupert's neck and started to play with his black, spiky hair until a noise interrupted their make out session.

Rupert growled in frustration and Henry whined from the absence of Rupert's lips. They both turned to find the source of the noise is from Rupert's phone.

Rupert checked it and he sighed in annoyance, it was Victoria who needed to talk to him about something.

"Ugh, I gotta go." said Rupert, still annoyed. "Victoria needs me for something."

"Ok." replied Henry, sadly. "I'll see you around?"

"Yeah."

Rupert got up to leave but almost forgot something, "Hey, I want to give you something."

"What is it?"

"Close your eyes."

Henry did as he was told, while his eyes were closed, he felt something being tied around his neck.

"All done." said Rupert, happily. "Go look in a mirror."

Henry opened his eyes in confusion and went to a mirror, he gasped as he saw a beautiful choker with a sapphire pendant in the middle.

"Do you like it?" asked Rupert, shyly.

"I love it." replied Henry, breathlessly.

He went to hug Rupert and he kissed him on the cheek, making Rupert blushed in the process.

They both said their goodbyes and they both had never felt so much happiness in a while now. A/N: I was gonna write smut in this chapter but decided to write in the next chapter.

#Henry Stickmin #henry stickmim collection #henry stickmin x rupert price #rupert price #victoria grit #thsc #thsc henry stickmin #thsc rupert price #thsc victoria grit #stickprice

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romancing-lady-whistledown · 4 years ago

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S6 overall thoughts

What I loved

- Lola. While no Skam-main will ever reach the levels of love and attachment I have to Lucas Lallemant, I think that especially concidering that Lola was literally introduced in the last scene of S5, her being my second favorite main of the show is quite an accomplishment and I think Flavie deserved alot of the honor for that. She needed to catch my attention right away, and she did.

- Eliott. Although I have a big complaint about how the later part of his storyline was concluded in this season which I’ll get back to, I still loved what I saw of him. With all his lovable traits and his flaws, to me he felt as well-rounded and lovable and interesting and relatable as I always found him. I loved seeing him get to direct, act in and eventually show his first ever movie, I loved that he got to talk about his illness again in the Luquette-clip, and I also loved how the video-store became a safe place for Lola to go when things weren’t going well with her family or with Maya.

- The Lecomte-sisters. Easily the best executed part of this season. Even as someone who hasn’t been the biggest fan of Daphne since S4 even I still felt their connection through the entire season and it was definitely my favorite love story in this show after Elu’s in S3, although an entirely different type of love.

- A lot of the clips. Although Skam France unfortunately struggle with solid narratives with satisfying endings, they are amazing at creating moments, and this season had a ton of clips and moments that I loved, still probably outweighing the number of clips I didn’t like so much.

- The acting. Skam France owes so much of their cast, they are really carrying the show.

- The cinematography. The blue and purple aesthetic was perfect for this season, and I also loved the red aesthetic of Eliott’s video store alot. I have never had a problem with Skam France’s cinamatic look, in fact that’s one part of their style that they really rock and that I really like even though it gives a totally different vibe from og Skam.

What I liked that could’ve been better

- Mayla’s storyline. The chemistry was there and I liked them, but I didn’t fall in love with them. I think it’s something in how their development was written. The romance was very much a side-plot in this season, which I’m not complaining about because I think it was fitting for Lola’s story, but a side-plot romance like that just didn’t need the Char-drama, especially after we already had Maya avoid Lola for a week. The development of the relationship just kinda lost me somewhere along the way so I unfortunately didn’t grow to love them the way I wish I did.

- Eliott’s arc. While I’m happy with what I saw from Eliott, his arc doesn’t feel fully completed. The sad thing is it would’ve been so easy. If they just gave Eliott and Lola a longer conversation about the club incident and one POV clip for Eliott and Lucas to talk about the insecurities that were brought up, that would’ve made a world of difference for me. And concidering how short episode 9 was there was time for that, so it’s not like I’m bitter or anything.

- Most of the storylines tbh. Like I really found most of the storylines in this season interesting, I really wanted to see them play out and get to a satisfying conclusion. But because of the way they chose to use their time, so many of those storylines never lived up to their potential, and it’s frustrating.

What I didn’t like

- The ending - This isn’t really so much about the last clip which was cute and all, although I have some complaints about it (Why did Charles have more lines that Lucas? Why did they drag S5 down with a love triangle just for Alexia and Arthur to suddenly get back together in the finale? Why miss the opportunity of a Lucas/Jo interaction when you’ve basically been setting up what could be a really funny scene all season? Shouldn’t Lucas and Lola at least exchange a look after the fight they had? Shoudn’t Eliott at least send a look in the direction of Mayla after he pushed so hard for Lola to bring Maya to the premiere?). But my main problem is about how significant storylines were left without a satisfying conclusion. Yes, there was alot of stuff going on in this season but also there was some poor use of the time they had, by either wasting time on unnecessairy and undeveloped side-characters or making the episodes short for no good reason. A lot could be done with that time. The angst kept going all the way into episode 10 and that shouldn’t be the case when you have this much to wrap up and you wrote this as if it was the last season of the show. In S3 there was angst in episode 9 and a tiny bit at the start of episode 10 when Eliott had his depressive episode, but since they already had wrapped up all the other conflicts in episode 7 they could focus almost entirely on giving that storyline a fullfilling and satisfying conclusion.

- The lack of communication - the truth is that alot of the issues brought up in this season would never be fully resolved in 10 weeks. Lola’s addiction-problems, Daphne’s eating disorder, Eliott’s insecurities. That won’t go away within the timespan of a season, all we can hope for is to leave them in a better spot where the future looks hopeful. But we can have conversations about these things, and while I’m glad we at least got confirmation that both Lola and Daphne are getting professional help, so many conversations about different issues and between different characters were missing for this season to wrap up in a truely satisfying way.

- The unnecessairy side-characters and the side-plots that came with them makes their own point on my list of things I don’t like because when I see them all I can think is how they took time away from giving the other stories better conclusions. I’m talking about Tiff and Char. I can see what their roles in the story were, I can see what purpose they were supposed to serve. Tiff and her squad served as a contrast to Lamifex at the start of the season, but then she was also dragged through the rest of the season with a cyberbullying plot that had very little impact and this whole thing was dragged out until the very last episode. As for Char, she sure pushed Lola to admit her feelings to Maya but I don’t think we needed her for that and I think having Maya and Lola making up after Maya avoided Lola for a week only for her to immediately start dating someone and kinda start avoiding her again was a poor use of time, both in the Mayla storyline and in the season as a whole.

- Making the episodes in the second half of the season super-short while the conflicts kept piling up was...a choice. And certainly not one I agree with looking at how everything concluded.

The short version is: I enjoyed alot of it, it was definitely the most I’ve enjoyed watching a season of Skam France since S3 because the parts I loved I really loved, so I would rewatch S6 over S1, S2, S5 and most definitely S4 any day. But the last portion of the season left me highly unsatisfied, both as an ending to Season 6 and as an ending for the original generation of characters. Yes, I know the last sequence of S5 was supposed to be the goodbye to the original generation, but that doesn’t make the situation any better to me because that scene, while there was a type of beauty to it, was just as underwhelming and unsatisfying as a goodbye to those characters as this clip was, and this was the last time we’ll see them. It’s of course bitter because there is so much lost potential to explore in alot of the og characters and even a 5 minute clip for each couple/single character could’ve made a huge difference there, which makes it harder to let go of the characters than it would be if the ending was at least somewhat satisfying. But on top of that it leaves a bit of a bad taste in my mouth that it shows a certain lack of respect for the attachment the audience as a whole (not just the most passionate fans like us but even the more casual viewers) have to the original characters. I don’t think they can ever satisfy everyone but this kinda just feels like a “Get over it and move on” kinda attitude and it definitely doesn’t make me feel any more enthusiastic about investing in their new characters and seasons. Because for me the strength in this show is in the characters, they’re what keeps me interested when the storytelling is weak which happens...quite a bit.

#skamfr #skam france

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charlessmithhasmyheart · 4 years ago

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Hiya!! Can I request Charles x fem reader having a baby together and Charles trying to figure out being a good dad❤️❤️ ( like getting advice from Abigail or something )

A/N: Hey! Wow...I can’t believe this took me so long to complete. Life has been pretty hectic lately, but I’m doing my best to come back into a regular schedule of writing, so apologies for all of that. But, I do hope you like this. I made it more of a Charles POV, because...why not. Anyways, enjoy! :)

P.S. - I know that this is kinda short, but I’m trying not to fry my brain too quickly as I get back into writing. And it’s a bit jumpy I think right now, so eventually this will be something I revisit, but...yeah...I’m gonna stop rambling now.

———————

“Look momma! Flowers!”

“I see, Melody. Shall we go pick some?”

Charles watched from where he sat piecing together arrows for his bow as you led your daughter to a patch of flowers growing near Beechers’ Hope. Bright yellows and pinks sprouted from the green grass. Small pops of colors among the earthy tones. Melody, a wild thing at such a young age, grabbed the closest she could find and he chuckled as she turned to give them to you, the biggest grin on her face.

The day had been surprisingly good. The rainy season had subsided and the three of you had been able to go on an official family outing for the first time in months. He remembered how excited you and Melody had been; spending a good part of the morning preparing a picnic lunch. Melody had done her best to assist, but eventually her mind wandered, leading her to beg Jack for a story.

As Charles watched Melody drag you towards another patch of flowers, he couldn’t help but reminisce on the first few days of her birth. It had come quite unexpectedly; your contractions starting weeks earlier than normal.

To say that Charles had been nervous was an understatement. His usual calm and collected nature had disappeared; replaced with a frantic, pacing, stammering mess. It had taken the gentle coaxing of Mary-Beth to calm him down, and Arthur had taken him out for a ride to clear the mind, though his thoughts only seemed to return to you and his soon-to-be-born child.

What seemed like eons later, the two had returned to camp just as you were finishing the last few pushes. Charles, trying to push away the resurfacing anxieties, had rushed to the tent, shoving past Tilly and Miss Grimshaw. He hadn’t even noticed the small bundle cradled in your arms until he had crouched down next to you where you had stretched out on a small cot. But when he did, his heart nearly stopped.

The child, which they would later name Melody, was absolutely perfect; dark eyes, small locks of black hair, and olive skin. The two of you spent the rest of the night in awe of the child the two of you created. It wouldn’t be for another week before Charles realized his nerves would carry over from beyond the birth.

It was a rainy day, not much able to be done save for a few washing chores, so Charles was able to spend most of the day with you and Melody. You were cooing and rocking her while he was piecing together a make-shift doll; something he hoped you would enjoy. As time passed, Melody become fussy and began to cry. Charles, normally calm under stress, had started, becoming unnerved. He hadn’t wanted to, but the crying of his child brought back memories of his time with his mother’s tribe; specifically the last few days before she, and many others, had been taken. When you had attempted to place Melody in his arms, he had jumped up from his seat and dashed out of the tent, deaf to your calls of alarm.

Ignoring the rain that began to slowly soak into his clothes, he had found himself under the shelter of a large tree near the edge of camp. There, he eased down on the damp grass, crossed his arms overs his knees, and placed his head on his hands. He had stayed like that, lost in thought for so long, that he had hardly noticed when the sound of footsteps began to get closer and closer.

“Charles, are you alright?”

It took a few moments before Charles had looked up to see Abigail standing over him, a worried look on her face. He wasn’t one to open up to others, especially those in the camp, but Abigail was one of few he could trust.

“No, I’m not.”

Abigail sighed and sat down next to him, adjusting her shawl to better cover her shoulders.

“I think I can probably guess what this is about.” She spoke carefully. “You’re worried about Melody, aren’t you.”

Charles blinked slowly, startled that someone could read him so easily.

“How did you know?”

“I felt the same exact way when my little Jack was born.” Abigail smiled softly. Charles noticed her eyes darkened as if she was remembering something she hadn’t wanted too. “I know our situations aren’t the same, but I’ve been were you are. Afraid of the future. Wondering if you’re truly ready to be a parent. The fear is real, but I think it’s proof that eventually it’ll turn out okay.”

“What am I supposed to do? I’ve never not known before.” Charles confessed.

“I’ve been Jack’s mother for four years, and I’m still asking that question.”

Charles couldn’t help but grin.

“No one’s ever said parenting is easy, but you just have to trust in your love and the love of your family. And if you can do that, you’ll be just fine.” Placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder, Abigail stood back up and disappeared among the inner camp.

Charles still couldn’t remember how long he had sat there under the tree, the rain filtering through the green leaves, as he contemplated everything Abigail had said. But eventually he had found his way back to the shared tent. You hadn’t moved, still cradling Melody, but when Charles entered, you had come to stand before him; tears in your eyes and a question on your lips.

“I’m sorry my Morning Dove,” Charles uttered. “I didn’t mean to worry you, but I’m better now. And I’m ready to make my future with you and our child.” He continued, brushing his strong fingers across your cheek. “I love you now, and I’ll love you even when things get tough. And right now, that’s all we need.”

#Character x Reader #Charles Smith #abigail roberts #rdr2 #rdr #Red Dead Redemption #red dead redemption 2 #writing #imagines #kinda reader insert #Charles POV

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askforimagineoroneshot · 6 years ago

Text

Let me heal you (Professor Xavier x reader)

Anon: Hi, I wanted to ask you if you could do X men imagine? Like professor Xavier, where he is in a wheelchair and in relationship with the reader. She is a mutant and has the ability to heal people but she gets super weak when she does something big like a broken bone - she can even die. She wants to heal him, he said no because he is worried about her. You can come up with the end. Thank you!! I love your writing. Maybe you like X men too.

Gifs are not mine. Imagine is!!

Hope you like it and I really hope that it's like you imagine it to be.

It took me a time to got it. Even to know how to do it but I think I got it. Enjoy

MASTERLIST

Y/N's point of view

“So kids please remember your assignments for the next class. Look at it, most importantly read the parts of the book I told you to.” I stood up from my desk. I was looking at a classroom full of young mutants. “You can go. That all for today.”

All of them got up and pack their things. Most of them got another class after mine. But I was free for today. I was teaching here because first I was teaching literature and I am as well mutant.

My mutation is not visible on my body. I had the ability to heal. People, mutants of even plants. How I find out about it actually when I was young and playing in the garden and I found a bird with a broken wing. I didn't know what I was doing. I just wanted to pet him but my hand did something incredible. I felt warm and then the wing got back into a position where it's supposed to be.

Long story short now I am teaching kids with abilities. But it feels like just kids. Because that what it is. They don't make difference between them and human kids so why should I?

I was able to leave the class, no-one was there, at least form kids, and I realize I was watched. From the door by a man in a wheelchair. I smiled.

“How long have you been watching me?” I asked with a smile.

“Not for long, love.” His blue eyes have light in them. I felt like I could drown.

“How was your day so far?” He continues to have a conversation with me when we walked through the halls of the school.

“It was fine, classes okay I guess.” I didn't know where he was going with the conversation.

I didn't want to look nervous. He would never read my mind. We were together for a long time. We knew each other since college. Before we even told each other truth about each other. I also knew Raven even longer. She introduces us. It feels like forever. I don't know who I would be if I didn't meet them.

“You're a very popular teacher among students. I don't know anyone who doesn't like you.”

“Well, I don't know what to say to that.” I went faster so I can open the door for Xavier. He went to another hall.

“Do you have some free time today?” He asks me with hopeful eyes.

To be honest. We didn't spend much time together lately. But I have a good reason to do so. Yes, I am going besides his back but for good. I was careful about it so it wasn't suspicious.

“Yes, I have. You want to spend time with me.” I smiled at him.

When I looked at him I could see all the reasons I fell in love with him. How he cared for others, how he loved others. The list can go on and on.

“I have somethings I need to finish in my office but I would love to spend some time with you in the garden.”

Since I knew where he was going I stopped in my track.

“I need to go to my office to so.” I smiled a started going backward. “See you outside.”

“Very well.” He smiled.

I didn't hear the wheelchair so I knew he was watching me leave. God, I hated the wheelchair. To know him and his need to go outside and explored nature and the world. All I ever wanted was for him to be happy. Even when it meant I was in danger. Don't get me wrong, I am got in healing people, but the energy I use for it is coming from my body. I am putting myself in risk if I do something big. But I need to help him. Even when he is against it. I don't care. Seeing him like this every day? What him how he looks at the kids in the garden from far. Not being capable to go out in the field.

I got my stuff in my office. I also change my top, so I feel fresh. I brushed my hair. Then I got the key to the secret box on my desk. I knew it wasn't fair and that itś not only my decision but I need to do it.

I took out a small ampul with drugs. It was safe. If I give it to Charles he will be fine, just a little out. He will know what is going on around him but will not be able to change anything about it.

I got one out of the box and close it again. I got up and went to Xavier's office.

I didn't nock. We are used to each other. I saw him by his desk, working on some paper.

“I thought you wanted to go out.” I laugh. I was standing by the door.

“I want to, love.” He put down his mug of tea with a smile. “I thought you had something to do. Like you said.” He moved in his wheelchair from the desk and we went outside.

“Whether is beautiful isn't it.” I look in the garden.

“Yeah it is.” he is right next to me with a smile on his face. We were at the balcony it is easier for Charles this way.

“It could be even better you know. I could make it better.” I need to try it again. I wanted to do it with his consent. I broke my heart to do this way.

“Please, love, you know I am not going to let you do it.” he was no longer smiling. “Just because my legs I am not going to risk your life.”

I wanted to try to talk some sense to him but Hank walked to us. He was happy to see us. So I stopped. I didn't want him to know about our fight. Fight? Well, it is not really a fight. More like a one-sided conversation.

Later that day

I was making tea for Charles. It felt like tears were burning holes in my heart. I just wanted him to be happy. I am doing the right thing. I know that.

Just stop thinking about it and do it. That's what kept running through my head.

I ported drugs to his tea. There is no way out of here now. I also put honey in it. Just like he wanted to. When I pick the mug up, it felt a lot heavier than normal. I knew why and I knew it was just in my head.

“Thank you, love,” he said when I put to his desk.

Sun was already down. I don't know what time is it.

“You work too much,” I said to him when I sitted on his desk. I was watching him smile when he drinks.

“No, love, you just worry too much.” He kept working on papers. I didn't really know what he was doing. All I did was to focus on my mind, to not let him in and I tried to relax as much as possible.

Nobody knows what I was about to do so it is all up to me.

It didn't take long and Charles felt sleepy. “I feel weird.

“How weird?” I asked to not be suspicious.

“Just really weird. It's hard to move my body. Or what left of it is in my control.

“Let me get you to bed. I will get Hank. I don't like this.” I took control over the wheelchair. I started to cry I didn't even realize.

I help him in the bed. “Why are you crying, love? I am sure I will be fine” He tried to make me feel better.

I looked at him with tears it was hard for me to see. When he was in the bed I felt like I can do it. I am not taking a step back.

“Yes, you will. I will make sure of that.” I said. I knew he will understand what I meant. And by his face, I knew he just did.

“What did you do?” He wasn't scared of me. He was worried about me. “Please don't do this. I maybe lost my feet but I am can not bear to lose you.” He was now crying too.

But I didn't care. I needed to start.

I could feel the energy going out of my body to his. I could sense where it was going and what it was doing. The process went on and on. Charles was feeling it as well but didn't know how to handle it. He was no longer able to try to convince me to not do it.

After a few minutes, I could feel my weakness. Normally I would stop and rest but now I couldn't. I was starting to lose control over my body. I felt pain. I tried to hold on for as long as I could but it took me to don't.

Xavier's pov

Week later

I could still hear her scream out of pain. It was in my head like it happened yesterday. But it didn't. Week passed and now I am standing by her bed where she is unconscious. Yes, I was standing. But alone!

“How is she doing?” I asked Hank that was taking care of her. I was here every day.

“She will be okay. She just needs time.” He said.

For a moment room was silent. “I understand why she did it.” He said.

“You can't be serious. She could kill herself.” I was not able to be angry anymore. I just needed her. That was all I wanted.

“I know why are you angry. This is one of the situations that doesn't have a right and wrong side.” he looked at me. “You just need to wait.”

And then he left. So I sit on bed nest to her weak body. She looked so pale and small. I petted her hair.

“I wish I could be angry with you.” I took her small hand in mine. “But I just want you with me. I need you with me. That's why I never wanted you to try to heal me. It was way too risky. And now look where we are.”

I kissed her forehead. “Just woke up, please love, I am begging you.”

And then I felt her hand move. It was weak and almost nothing but for me, it was a moment I knew she was coming back to me. Then her eyes start to open. She looked superposed at first. Didn't know where she was so she panicked a little.

“Love, it's okay. Look at me.” I stood up to be closer to her. “It's alright.”

When her eyes found me she looked happy to see me. When she realized that I was standing she started to cry. They were happy tears.

“You're one stupid girl. Look where you are.” Now I was crying too. She tried to talk to me but I didn't let her. “No, rest love, just rest. You are really weak. It's okay, I got you.” I hold her close to me.

#imagine #x men imagine #x men x reader #charles xavier #charles xavier x reader #charles xavier imagine #professor x

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bedlamsbard · 5 years ago

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you've probably been asked this before, but-- thoughts on jedi fallen order? your star wars meta/fic/etc is always my favorite and i'm very interested to hear what you think of the new game!

I liked it a lot!

So, as I’ve said before, I haven’t played it; I watched a playthrough on YouTube about a week or so after it came out, so I’d gotten spoiled for it despite trying to avoid spoilers, and the particular playthrough I watched actually had the sound cut out on two of the big scenes, so that was a disappointment. Watching it rather than playing it means that I definitely missed some things that I’ve seen people mention about it, and I’d like to play it at some point if I can get the tech to cooperate, though that likely won’t be for a while.

I was a little wary about Cal Kestis going in because of the comments that the creators of the game had made about not wanting to have a female/POC/alien main character, but for me Cal was good enough, sweet enough, and interesting enough to overcome that. I really liked how much weight JFO gave to trauma, living with it, and overcoming it, with Cal, Cere, Merrin, Trilla, and the other characters. Obviously the poncho is Peak Star Wars, and BD-1 is very sweet. And I love Inquisitors.

I know JFO has gotten some criticism for being ~yet another padawan survivor story, but Cal is so distinct from either Kanan or Ahsoka that that’s not really how it feels to me, and I think his interaction with Cere, Trilla/Second, and the Ninth Sister really make his story unique compared to the other two. I love the beginning of the game; it’s such strong world- and environment- building, and the strong sense of Cal’s personality really comes through in his introduction (headphones, blasting music, “I’m trash, I’m just not approved trash” -- he’s peak 2019 gen Z, in my millennial POV).

As far as the actual plot goes, it’s *flips hand* pretty much eh. It’s a MacGuffin and there’s no way around that; it’s also revisiting plot points from TCW and the Charles Soule Darth Vader comics. I can understand why Lucasfilm would want to continue to revisit that particular plot point but also, I’m tired of it. As far as JFO goes, the MacGuffin is mostly an excuse for the journey, which was...interesting. There are parts of it I really liked; sorry, my dumb brain loves gladiatorial fights even if that probably wasn’t, like, necessary. Kashyyyk was fun; it’s fun to see Saw Gerrera again even if I’m also kind of like “dude, you haven’t changed your armor in fifteen years?” I enjoyed seeing Dathomir again even if I have mixed feelings about the choices made insofar as the worldbuilding, but Merrin was really wonderful. The Zeffo...I still feel that the Zeffo, aesthetically, belong in Stargate rather than Star Wars; their actual use in the game also felt a bit more Stargate rather than SW, for me? I mean, they’re also a MacGuffin, but I suppose insofar as SW go they’re on the same order as Loo Re Anno’s species from the Han Solo comic or the Rakata from the EU, so not really something that doesn’t have a place in Star Wars.

The Inquisitors. I love Inquisitors. I don’t necessarily love these Inquisitors. I unfortunately got spoiled for the Second Sister’s reveal as Trilla/Cere’s former padawan, which kind of affected how I felt about her, and I’m also in the FB cosplay build group for Second and it’s a little cutthroat, so that affected it too. She’s...fine? Something about her just doesn’t hang together for me, and I can’t quite put my finger on what it is at the moment. The Ninth Sister has such a strong personality from the Darth Vader comics, and while she’s in character between the comics and the game, it also means I was a little taken aback by her abrupt ending. (And I note that it feels a little weird that Trilla gets the name and the tragic backstory and the personal attachment and the not-actually-redemption, but Ninth doesn’t get any of those.) It was also weirdly surreal for me to see the Fortress Inquisitorius, a.k.a. the canon version of the Crucible from Backbone, but tbh I think the decision to put it on another planet/moon(?) in the Mustafar system actually weakened it.

I got spoiled for Darth Vader’s appearance and that was one of the places where the sound cut out on the playthrough I watched, so it didn’t quite have the effect that it probably would have done had I gone into it cold. That said, Cal and Cere should probably be dead; as I’ve seen pointed out, Vader hasn’t been allowed to kill anyone of significance in the new canon, which kind of undercuts him. (The closest he’s come has been Jocasta Nu in the comics.)

All right. The ending. I don’t like the ending. Not because I really thought that Cal and Cere should have refounded the Jedi Order, but because I feel like they put the destruction of the holocron in the wrong place; I think they should have destroyed it to keep it away from Vader. The conscious decision made not to re-found the Order is really uncomfortable for me, especially in light of the way that the new canon has treated the subject over the past couple years. I was talking about this with @reena-jenkins a while back, so I’ll just copy and paste what I said there. (Note that this was back in November, before TROS came out.)

(I’ve cut most of Reena’s responses and a little bit of other conversation we were having.)

So yeah, I have some problems with the ultimate ending decision, but as usual a lot of it comes down to how that intersects with other plot lines that Lucasfilm has done over the past five/six years.

Another thing I kept thinking of throughout the game was something one of the creators said -- either in an interview or at SWCC earlier this year, I can’t remember which, that there was a lot of debate on where to put the hyphen in Jedi: Fallen Order, i.e. that it could have been Jedi Fallen: Order (though title-wise that doesn’t stand up as much). I do like how much emphasis there is on “fallen order” -- the Jedi Order, of course, but also the Nightsisters, the Zeffo, the Inquisitors and Purge troopers as a kind of twisted version of the Jedi and clone troopers, even the structure of the Republic being corrupted into the Empire.

One thing that took me by surprise with JFO was also how much intersection it had with Galaxy’s Edge! Not to the extent that I would have noticed it if I hadn’t already been to Galaxy’s Edge, but having gone and also having the kind of brain that literally just absorbs stuff and then retains it. Like, for example, the Galaxy’s Edge sporks that are now no longer used because people kept stealing them; they’re used in one of the meals on the Mantis. Cal remaking his lightsaber and using the parts you can get at Savi’s got picked up by a couple of news outlets; I think this is actually a bit unfortunate, because they went for the Galaxy’s Edge lightsaber proportions for many of his lightsaber options and in my opinion, those are less elegant proportions than usually seen in Star Wars, so it ends up looking clumsy to me. Another proportion thing that follows Galaxy’s Edge -- the holocron, both Cere’s and the MacGuffin holocron; the Galaxy’s Edge ones seem to be proportionally a bit bigger than the holocrons seen in Rebels and TCW, and the ones in the game follows Galaxy’s Edge rather than TCW/Rebels sizing. The Nightsister zombie crate in Galaxy’s Edge may also be a JFO reference rather than a TCW one, though obviously it could also apply to both.

I really enjoyed the Clone Wars/Order 66 flashbacks, though actually Order 66 was ANOTHER place the sound cut out! I told you that it was the most dramatic reveals where I lost sound! I loved that Jaro Tapal was a Lasat; I also like that, as far as I can tell, some of Cal’s specific movement types (wall-running and his tendency to be like “cool, gonna climb that”) seem to be more Lasat-inspired than other types of Jedi movement we’ve seen before. I really like the design of Jaro’s lightsaber; I remember in the promo I was confused about the fact that it didn’t seem to be proportional to Cal, but of course it’s not! It was made by a Lasat for a Lasat! Order 66 is always such a mess -- and actually, I’m struck by how different Cal’s and Caleb’s experiences of it were? I think one thing that the game made clear to me is how lucky Kanan got, in all ways.

The ending is obviously setting up for a sequel; I don’t really think Cal and Cere should have survived, but it we get a decent sequel out of it I guess I’m okay with it. I know I’m missing details in this review, but I really did enjoy watching it; I liked the characters, I liked the worldbuilding, I think it did some really intriguing things even if I don’t agree with every decision made. (And, selfishly, I like my Inquisition better than the canon one.)

#jedi fallen order #bedlam watches star wars #janeghoulittle #bedlam answers

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