#these are really important thoughts of course

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

Sorry if you've already covered this, but I was scrolling socials and saw that the San Antonio zoo got a large donation to expand their savanna habitat. The only thing that jarred me as I read through their expansion plans was apparently they're going to be outfitting some 'safari' vehicles so guests can be taken into the habitat to feed and interact with the animals (from within the vehicle). I was always under the impression that this kind of interaction wasn't necessarily good for either the humans or the animals-- is there a way it can be done ethically?? Anyway, I just thought it was interesting!

Ooo, okay, your question aligned with a thing I've been chewing on for a while, so let's talk ~ethics~ and ~philosophy~ aka this is gonna be a bit long. I do promise I'll answer your question, though!

The first thing I want to note is that you're really asking about two different things, which are almost always conflated these days when it comes to talking about animals: welfare (is the animal happy / healthy / safe) and ethics (is what's happening good / moral / acceptable). It's really important that we distinguish between the two, because welfare is an objective measure of physical and mental wellbeing, and ethics are a human construct that involves subjective interpretation.

A useful but highly oversimplified example of this is the bothering of cats for online videos. Pestering a cat to get a funny reaction once in a while may not impact their overall welfare. Welfare is the cumulative impact of an animal's experiences, which means that single acute moments may not weight heavily on the entire balance. If the cat is healthy, fed well, enriched, and has a good and positive bond with their humans, those momentary irritations for videos might not matter much. That doesn't mean that you or I, as viewers, might not still find bothering an animal for internet clout ethical. We can believe that humans shouldn't ever unnecessarily put their pet through negative experiences, and we can think that doing so just because it brings the human money or fame is distasteful. But! We have to recognize that as used in this example, those ethical stances aren't inherently tied to the animal's welfare state. Many people I know who dislike cat-bothering don't care if the animal has good welfare outside of that situation - they don't like that the situation occurs at all, ever.

So, back to your question. You're wanting to know if it's okay for a zoo to have a drive-through aspect of an exhibit where people get to feed the animals. You're asking if it's safe for the humans and for the animals (which is a welfare question) and if that type of interaction is ethical. I could just tell you that of course it's fine, San Antonio is an AZA zoo and their accreditation only allows them to do "good things" but that's now how it works here (nor is it the reality of accreditation).

The safety aspect is one I'm not worried about. It's actually a pretty common thing for reputable facilities to do some sort of vehicle tour in savanna habitats, whether in the guest's vehicle (safari parks) or on a hay-ride type vehicle (zoos). Many of those allow guests to feed out specific parts of their animals' diets. Offhand, I know Tampa and Fossil Rim both have feeding tours like this in a staff-driven vehicle. It's not specified from the zoo's press release, but I can guarantee you that guests will not be driving those vehicles - which means the interactions will be proctored by staff and what people are feeding out will be carefully regulated. The habitat is going to have rhino, giraffe, zebra, ostrich, and antelope/gazelle, and I'd guess that the drive-through is going to stick to those latter two and maybe additional species. Those are animals where a car is an appropriate safety barrier.

As to if it's ethical to do? It's spiny question, because it depends very directly on the ethical perspectives of the person you're asking. I think it's fine - you may not. Let's break down the different things that come into consideration on the ethical side, and my responses:

"The zoo is commercially exploiting animals by letting people pay to get closer." If the issue is that people paying to get closer to animals is using them for money, well, that's the business model of a zoo (non-profit or not, they still need revenue to operate). So IMHO it's not like it's "less ethical" than anything else the zoo is doing, using that framing.

"Zoo animals should be allowed to be wild and undisturbed by guests driving in their habitats." Zoo animals aren't wild, and their entire lives revolve around humans and the human work schedule. As long as a vehicle entering the habitat doesn't have a negative welfare impact (e.g. they're not scared of it), it's not very different from the rest of the routine of managed care.

"Feeding zoo animals will encourage people to try to feed wild animals." Thanks to obnoxiously viral content creators, people are going to try to feed wild animals no matter what. Doing it in a proctored situation where a staff member can try to do some education at the same time is probably the best possible scenario.

"People just do those tours to get close to cool animals." People are always going to want to touch the animals. If being able to pay for a tour keeps them from jumping the fence to try to pet a rhino, great.

There's one more that I want to talk about separately, because I think it's where a lot of confusion gets generated. It's this idea that "Humans shouldn't be interacting with animals at all, any interaction is unethical and bad for the animals." This is a welfare crossover, but not one actually informed by welfare science in a captive situation. And I think it's because the internet lacks nuance. Yes, it is absolutely correct to say that with wild animals, you should never ever try to feed a deer out of your car (or similar). It is incredibly harmful to those animals on both an acute and chronic timeline. But thanks to the rage-bait algorithms on social media and people endlessly justifying doing stupid, dangerous, bad things (and getting pushback for it), there's been a lot of bleed between the public's understanding of what wild animal welfare is and what captive animal welfare is. Combine that with the reality that captive animal welfare cannot be assessed or diagnosed from a single context-less clip, and that people with strong beliefs and no practical experience with the field/species/individual will pass judgement loudly to their audiences...

The result is almost a reflexive believe in many sectors of the internet that any human-animal interaction that isn't couched as a "rescue" is inherently unethical, for reasons people often can't articulate. Which is why, I think, so often people want to support certain aspects of captive animal management but feel guilty for doing so. I see this a lot in the questions the blogs gets, and I'm glad people feel comfortable asking, because it's important to think through not just the individual instances but the patterns leading us to question them.

So yes, I'd say that a staff-led experience in a vehicle chosen for safety is an ethical way to proctor an interaction between guests and certain savanna species. It will vary by facility - I'm always more wary about guests driving, although many drive-through safaris are fine - and by setup. I think what San Antonio is doing will be fine, though, and will be interested to see / hear about the setup when they start up.

If you've got a question about ethical captive management, I'm always happy to talk about it - but I'd invite you to poke around in your head a little and send me not just your question in the ask, but your thinking about why or why not something might be concerning. It's great practice for understanding why you relate to animal ethics the way you do, and where those beliefs come from.

[l3viat8an]

Mammon waking you up by going down on you (with prev consent ofc) or you waking Mammon up with a BJ >_<

Nsfw!

Honestly thought this posted already- cuz it was supposed to be in queue for Mams birthday jsksjsk

I feel like that would happen all the time after you start dating Mammon! I mean he just can’t get enough of you and it is a rather nice way to wake up~

And really some mornings he gets so needy and you look so sweet laying there next to him that he just can’t keep his hands or lips off of you.

At first Mammon was just planning to kiss you, a few kisses down your neck and chest wouldn’t hurt right?- then he starts going lower, moving your clothes out of the way so he can keep kissing your skin, down across your chest and tummy and somehow he ends up between your legs… oops~

You wake up slowly, your mind groggy with sleep and pleasure as your eyes open and all you can see of your boyfriend is a lump under the covers. But as soon as you wake up and start grinding your hips to meet his face a little harder Mammon grabs your hips to pin you back down. At the same time he lifts his head to look up at you, which makes the covers fall back a bit so you can see his face, (his hair is an absolute mess too but that’s not super important :D) a crooked little smirk on Mammon’s face as he sits up enough to press a few more soft and wet kiss across your tummy. Mumbling out “Mornin’ darlin’.” against your skin before he goes right back to what he was doing- making you cum on his face-

He thinks its cute how you try to prop yourself up a bit on your elbows to look down at him and enjoy the show, chuckling to himself as he sucks on your clit just right, that it has your head rolling back and you have to plop right back down onto the pillows because it felt that good.  After all he knows all your sweet spots.

Neither of you talk much but Mammon would praise you for being so good and cummin’ for him, ya should let him take care of ya more often~

Sooo of course it’s only right that you ‘repay him’ wake him up head the next morning.  

Again not hard Mammon almost always has ‘morning wood’ when you sleep in the same bed.

While you’re under the covers tease his tip a bit -trust me- before taking his cock all the way into your mouth.

As soon as you start Mammon’s awake and you can hear all his breathlessly, little moans of “Yea~” and “Oh fuck, yes darlin’, just like that” I’m telling you he can’t keep his mouth shut- “S-shit- Don’t stop fuck.” and even more, “Please- Yea, like that, faster.”

There is a special something -not quite tenderness but that’s the closest word you can think of- to Mammon in these moments. Even as you have his cock in your mouth, even as he groans under his breath and his legs tense. Even as he grabs a handful of your hair and gently pushes you down a little bit to see if you can take him even further down your throat, he’s not trying to be mean but he loves it when you gag on him. Making him moan even louder “Shit- So fuckin’ g-good treasure.” as he cums down your throat.

Maybe it’s the way he smooths over your hair as you swallow his cum. Or maybe it’s the way he starts to pull you up to lay your head on his chest and wraps his arms around you as tightly as he can immediately after. It’s all done with care, as if you’re the most precious thing in his room. And of course to him you are.

(Although if you wanna tease Mammon a little more instead- sit up before he can pull you up and let the covers pool around you as you make a show of licking the last few drops of his cum off your lips ;))

[leclercsluvs]

LN4 | Our Forever Moment

an: i still don't really know how much i like to make written fics, but i have ideas for them so i'm going to continue to try and write them, i think. my first language is NOT english, so sorry if there's any mistakes <3 pairing: lando norris x fem!reader, vasseur!reader (this is gonna be fun, lowkey not important, gets mentioned like a few times because i forgot) warnings: swearing (like twice) inspired by: mine - taylor swift word count: 6.2k

As she’s being dragged to another race, she wonders when her dad is going to realize she's always running off and never in the garage of his own team, she doesn’t know that he’s fully aware she’s never there. She’s been welcomed by everyone she’s visited though, which does make him happy. She mostly goes to Mercedes and Red Bull, but lately Mclaren has been looking quite interesting. 

“Are you going to stay in the Ferrari garage today? Or am I gonna have to send someone over to Red Bull or Mercedes to find you?" Fred looks at yn with a playful smile.

“I didn’t think you noticed.” She's quite shocked. He always seemed to switch off being a dad whenever they stepped into the garage, so it never even occurred to her that he even wanted her there.

“Who do you think sends someone after you at the end of the day?” He turns back around as they get closer, “I think you, Charles and Carlos would be great friends if you gave them a chance,” they turn and walk into the Ferrari hospitality. “Oh speaking of boys, have you found a boyfriend I need to approve of?” He quickly looks back to see her surprised face before he turns back to see where he’s going, even though he could probably navigate it blindfolded.

“Well first of all, you wouldn’t need to approve of him, this isn’t the middle age,” yn lets out a small laugh, “and second, all of my relationships have failed, you’re partly to blame for pulling me to almost every race, and then I guess I’m just not girlfriend material.” She follows her dad around, because even if she does get pulled to all races, she usually doesn't hang out here for more than 5 minutes before she’s off to find Max or George. 

“Chérie, anyone not willing to spend the short time you're home isn’t worth your time,” he stops in his track turns around and puts a hand on her shoulder, “and I’m not sure if I ever said it, but if you truly would prefer to stay home and only travel to a few, that is fine. I would understand.”

She gives him a reassuring smile, “I know. You wouldn’t have been able to drag me out of the house if I didn't truly want to be here.”

He gives one quick smile before continuing walking, and before she knows it, she’s left to herself because he’s needed for something important.

~~~

It doesn’t take long for Charles to spot yn, sitting by herself, because apparently everyone else is busy today. “Yn? what are you doing here? I thought you’d be off doing something with Max?” Charles looks around to see if Max is around and he just hadn't seen him, but it’s a lost cause, which he should have realized, Max wouldn’t be seen anywhere near anything related to Ferrari. Except for Charles of course.

“No he’s busy. Everyone suddenly got busy.” She looks back down at her phone and the messages between her and her friend, however it would be rude to text back while Charles is in front of her, so she turns it off and stuffs it in her pocket. “I don't really remember the last time everyone, well except for you I guess, was busy at the same time.” 

“Well, I’m meeting Lando and Oscar for lunch, do you want to join us?” Charles asks with a smile, flashing some cute dimples. Not that anything could ever happen between the two. As attractive as Charles may be, her dad was his boss, and nothing good was going to come out of that. 

“I think I’d like that,” she smiles back as she picks up her bag with her essentials, “it’s nothing fancy right? I didn’t really get dressed for something over the top.” She looks down at the ripped jeans and the oversized t-shirt that she’s wearing. Not exactly the cutest outfit.

~~~

“So you still live with your dad?” Oscar asks curiously, they all seemed fairly happy she was invited by Charles. And Oscar, who she hadn’t really spent any time with, has been asking a lot of questions. 

“I do. I may be 21, but living at home is just a little easier. And I like spending time with my dad, even if I run off to other teams at the first chance I get.” She answers as she takes another bite of her food. Lando has been awfully quiet and it didn’t go over yn’s head. She was fully aware of how glued his eyes were to his food. 

“Is it weird? That your dad is responsible for a Formula 1 team?” Oscar almost forgets to eat, because of all the questions he’s asking.

“It was in the beginning, but I've gotten used to it by now,” she takes a sip of water. “Is he always this quiet?” yn looks at the way Lando is poking his food “and is he always just poking his food?” She questions, making Lando's eyes move up for just a split second and then back down to his food.

“No. He’s usually pretty chatty, maybe he’s just nervous for tomorrow," Oscar says, finally eating some of his food. “He doesn’t usually get like this before a race though,” Oscar leans his head a little to the side as if thinking about it, before poking a finger in Lando’s side making him jump a little. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” Oscar asks.

“Maybe he’s got a new crush,” Charles jokes, taking a bite of food just as Lando suddenly coughs and gulps down water.

“Are you okay?” Yn asks as Lando suddenly gets up from his chair avoiding any and all eye contact.

“No, I’m actually not feeling so great. I think I’ll have to cut this short if I want to be good to go by tomorrow.” He quickly gathers his things as everyone looks confused. “Bye!” And then he’s out of there.

“Well that was weird.” Oscar says as he goes back to eating

“Do you think it was me?” Yn looks at the rest of the men sitting around the table, a little sad that she may have ruined their lunch.

Charles smiles. “Yes,” he says, looking at yn, “but in a good way. I think I might be right, even if it was just a joke.” He lets out a laugh. “I’m sure there’s some truth to it.” He goes back to eating, and so does yn, deciding that maybe she’ll talk to Lando in private.

~~~

On his way back to the hotel, Lando struggles to figure out his emotions. Of course yn is absolutely gorgeous. But considering she’s Fred's daughter he wouldn’t dare to think of her as anything but a friend. He may not race for Ferrari, but he still has a lot of respect for the man. And Lando knows about his reputation of not being able to keep his relationships going for long. Hopefully he can just subtly ignore her. Because the feelings, and thoughts he had during that lunch were not friendly. And before he even considers anything, he needs to make sure his feelings for her are romantic, and not just him finding her pretty.

~~~

Lando spent close to 4 months avoiding yn to the best of his abilities, and when he wasn’t ready and she caught him off guard he made up some weird excuse about needing to look at data, test the car, try some new Mclaren merch for photoshoots. Yn usually knew they were lies, and wondered why Lando was so set on avoiding her. To be quite honest, it brought down her mood, and she spent more and more time in the Ferrari garage and hospitality. Her dad sensed something was wrong. She was rarely there and suddenly she never left? Something was going on and he was going to get the bottom of it. 

“I see you’re spending time here today,” Fred sat across from yn. She was eating lunch. Alone. That was how she spent most of her time lately. All alone. Lando had unknowingly made her really anti-social.

“I guess.” She poked a little at the salad she had bought. She didn’t really want it anymore. 

“Did the others have plans?” Fred asks, looking around.

“I’m not sure.”

“Is something bothering you?” Fred asked, concerned for her daughter who used to have a lot to talk about. A lot of people to talk to, and who never spent time at lunch alone in Ferrari.

“Nope.” Fred sighed. He wasn’t going to get any answers. If it was because she genuinely just didn’t feel like talking today or if there was something wrong, he wasn’t sure. But he was gonna ask Max, or maybe Lewis to talk to her. He didn’t want her to be lonely. He got up from his chair. He had to get this started immediately. 

Fred’s quest to find Lewis was surprisingly easy. He found the soon-to-be Ferrari driver hanging out with Charles and Carlos near their own garage. “Lewis! Can we talk?” Fred called out before he reached them. Lewis just nodded and started walking towards Fred.

“Is it about my contract?” Lewis asked cautiously. He knew he hadn’t been performing that great in the Mercedes this year and was afraid Fred was going to only make it a year so he could be finished with him.

“No. I need you to talk to yn. She's suddenly spending a lot of time with Ferrari, but alone. Which, as you may know, isn’t where, or how, she usually spends her time.'' Fred looks really concerned, and it’s like it’s transferred to Lewis immediately. He’s known yn ever since her dad started dragging her along. She would usually spend time with George when she went to Mercedes, but sometimes when George wasn’t there and she just wanted to be somewhere else, Lewis and yn would play some games. Usually chess. Lewis was definitely better than yn but she still loved it. They could often lose track of time and suddenly one from the Mercedes team would come and get Lewis to either do some media related stuff or because it was time to get ready for a race.

“Of course! Now that you mention it, I haven't seen her around Mercedes for quite some time now. I’ll see what I can do, if I can't figure it out, I'll have Max ask her. They’ve always had quite a special bond I don't understand” Lewis gives the man a reassuring smile and a clap on the shoulder “Don’t worry, we’ll get her back to her talkative self very soon.”

“Thanks Lewis,” Fred looks relieved, but only for a second when his eyes widen. “Do you think Max did something to her? To make her feel this way?” He looks around as if he's scanning the surroundings for Max. And good thing he isn’t around. It wouldn’t have been a good outcome.

“I doubt it. He’s always been nice. Especially to her,” when he realizes how that may sound to the man in front of him and the way his eyes narrow, he quickly adds “as a friend. Not romantically. I’m pretty sure he’s actually in a relationship.” Fred seems to almost relax at those words and gives Lewis a quick pat on the shoulder

“Hurry up and get my daughter back. I miss her.” and with that he walks off. Hopefully not to find Max. And if so, Lewis sure is glad he isn’t Max right now.

~~~

When Lewis finally finds yn sitting just on the outside of the track he’s surprised she was allowed. But then again she probably just mentioned being Fred's daughter and she was allowed. “Hey there. Looking cozy. Mind if I join you?” He doesn’t wait for a response, just sits down next to her on the grass.

“What do you want?” She asks. Not really feeling the company right now.

“You haven’t been spending much time with George lately. Have you been spending more time with Max?”

“No.” Straight to the point. But not really the point Lewis was looking for.

“Have you been spending time with Charles and Carlos? Since you’re spending so much time with Ferrari at the moment?”

“Would that be a crime?” She looks at Lewis, and he sees something different. Her eyes don't look as alive as they usually do. They’re missing the glow that makes yn herself.

“Yn, is something wrong? You know you can talk to me. Or Max,” he waits for a second, not sure if he should continue, but as she starts plucking at the grass without answering he decides she needs to know. “Your dad is worried about you.”

“Oh.” She answers, plucking a few more grass straws

“Did something happen?” Lewis asks, trying a different approach.

“I don't know. Maybe you should ask Lando.” Lewis is unsure what Lando has to do with this entire situation, but he promised Fred to get to the bottom of it, so he will.

“Did he do anything?” Lewis is ready to fight Lando. “If so, I’ll gladly talk to him”

“Well, maybe he’ll talk to you,” yn shrugs and gets up from the grass. “I have no idea what I did to him. He seemed happy enough about me being invited to join him, Oscar, and Charles for lunch a couple months ago, and then during lunch he was so quiet, barely looking up from his food and then he suddenly said he wasn’t feeling great and needed to leave.” Yn turns around and looks at Lewis, tears starting to form in her eyes. “He has ignored me ever since. Every time I’ve tried to talk to him he either runs away or makes up some dumb excuse to get away from me,” she wraps her arms around herself as if to protect herself. “I’m sorry,” she says, shakes her head and turns around again and starts walking away. “I shouldn't have put all of this on you. I'm probably just overthinking it anyway.”

"Wait!" Lewis is quick to get up from the grass and gets a hold of yn’s arm, ”I’m glad you told me. Let me talk to Lando. See if I can figure out why he’s avoiding you. Maybe there’s a reason,” yn smiles a small smile, but it’s better than the empty expressions she's had lately. “Nice to see you’re still capable of smiling.” Lewis returns it with a smile of his own and guides her towards the Mclaren hospitality. “Now let’s get to the bottom of this.”

“Thank you. Not just for this, but also for always putting up with my bullshit.” Yn looks straight ahead. She wasn’t exactly planning on saying any of that, but oh well. It won’t hurt anyone. 

Lewis just laughs and pushes her lightly. “You should be grateful. It's impossible to keep putting up with it.” If he wasn’t laughing while saying it, she would have been hurt, but she just laughs with him and follows him, to hopefully get some answers from Lando.

~~~

Lando was not expecting to see Lewis, so he wasn’t able to run off as quickly as he usually does, and when he spots yn behind Lewis, he tries to make up some excuse about having to talk to an engineer about a possible car problem but Lewis stops him. “Lando. That’s enough.” He puts a hand on Lando's shoulder before he gets a chance to run off. “Why do you keep running away from yn?”

Lando sighs, he can’t run away from it anymore. “I kinda would prefer for this conversation to happen between just me and yn.” He runs a hand through his hair and down the back of his neck. 

Lewis looks back at yn, then at Lando, then back at yn, “are you fine with that?” He asks, while she nods and follows Lando into his drivers room

“So.” Lando starts, not really sure how to get the conversation going.

“Why have you been ignoring me for the past 4 months?” Yn asks, wanting to get this solved as soon as possible. “Did I say something that upset you so much during lunch that day?” Yn can feel the tears threatening to spill over, but she would like to get through this conversation without crying.

“No! Oh my god. Not at all!” He turns around because he’s not sure he can look at her while telling her this. “I think I might, sort of, have feelings for you.” The room is filled with silence. Lando is almost afraid she ran out of the room, If it wasn't for the fact he could hear her breathing. 

“So you decided the best action was to avoid me?” Yn asks, with a playful grin. If she had known this was all it was she would have had someone talk to him earlier. 

Her playful tone makes Lando turn around with a sheepish smile. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have ignored you or run off every time you tried talking to me. I was just afraid I would end up spilling a full love confession, and I’m not sure your dad would be too happy with that.”

“Well he doesn’t get a say in my love life.” Yn closes the distance between her and Lando. 

“I suppose you’re right.” Lando takes a step forward, making the distance between them smaller.

“So are you going to be doing anything about it?” Yn tilts her head slightly.

“When I have planned it,” Lando smiles and takes a step back as he feels a vibration in his pocket. “Damn, I actually do have to go now,” a text from his engineer asking him to come back for a meeting. Lando grins and walks towards the door, “but you're totally free to stay here until I’m back. And trust me, I’ll be spending the entire meeting planning the perfect way to ask you out.” He flashes a quick smile before he's out of the door and yn is left alone in the room. But this time being all alone is different. She doesn't feel all alone. She’s the happiest she’s been in four months.

~~~

“I have the perfect plan.” Lando and Oscar are doing a track walk just to have something to do and make sure the track is fresh in their memory for the practice the next day. 

“Yeah?” Oscar isn’t really sure it’s going to be as perfect as Lando thinks it is. “Are you totally sure about that?” He questions, raising an eyebrow, while taking in the surroundings of Monaco.

“I’m 100% sure.” Lando nods. He knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s in fact not going to ask directly. He’s made a fun little game, and got a few drivers in on it. “Just promise me to not ruin it when she comes to you.” Oscar sighs. He obviously isn’t going to spoil it.

“How are you going to ask her? If you aren’t doing it directly.”

“That’s a surprise.” And no matter how much Oscar pushes, Lando doesn't tell. Just smiles and shakes his head.

The next day when yn arrives at the paddock Alex greets her as soon as she’s arrived. “For you.” He says and hands her a letter.

“For me?” Her face is full of confusion as she opens the letter. 

“Dear yn, I’ve made a little scavenger hunt for you. I hope you’re going to have fun. At the end you’ll find a surprise. Here’s the first clue.”

That’s the end of the letter. “So what's the clue?” If anything she's even more confused now, it doesn’t even say who it's from. It could be from George. But she doubts it. He’s never done anything like this before.

“Oh right, I almost forgot,” Alex rushes and pulls a small lego car from his backpack. more specifically a Mclaren lego car.

“So I'm guessing I have to go to Mclaren?” She questions and looks at Alex who just shrugs. So that’s where she heads to next. Who knows how long this is going to last. She does think it’s going to be fun though. She’s always loved clues.

As she gets closer to the Mclaren garage she finds Oscar standing looking around holding a letter in his hand. As he notices her, he walks towards her. “Here. From a mystery man.” He says, hands her the letter and walks off trying to look mysterious.

Yn laughs and opens the letter. This time, there’s no text. Just a card. “Happy fathers day.” She reads out loud. That’s all the card says. “I guess that means i’ll have to go to my dad?” She wonders out loud. Would this person involve her dad? Would her dad want to be involved? “Hm, probably just ferrari.” She says as she notices the card is mostly red.

She walks over to the Ferrari garage but can't find anything and decides it might be at the hospitality. As she enters the building she notices Carlos standing with a smile on his face and a whistle in his hands. “Here you go.” He hands her the whistle as she reaches him. 

“That's it? Not a letter? Anything to guide me more than-'' she looks down at the whistle now in her hand, “a whistle?” She looks back up at Carlos who looks around.

“Consider the first letter of the whistle.” He whispers and quickly walks off, whistling. 

“The first letter of whistle is w. So..” she thinks for a second. “Williams?” She laughs and quickly walks over to the Williams hospitality, but to her surprise finds no one, and decides it must be their garage then.

Here she finds Logan happily holding a small boat toy. “For you.” He says and hands it to her. Happy to be included. She smiles and wonders if this is the last one.

“Thank you, Logan.” She sends him a smile and walks to the dock to find a boat. Not really sure which type of boat, big or small. But she’s determined to find it. 

When she gets to the dock, she fears it’s going to take a long time, until she spots Charles casually sitting on a yacht. As she approaches she notices a full basket of red bulls sitting beside him. “I guess I’m going back to the track. To Red Bull. Their garage?” She is sure to get those 10k steps she’s supposed to get every day. 

“Yeah, if you want something to drink on your walk, I have plenty,” he pushes the basked towards yn and gestures for her to bring it, “in fact, let me join you on the way back, I was only sent here to give you the clue, and I don't drink Red Bull, so I can return it.” He smiles and gets up, taking the basket full of cans. “Are you having fun so far?” Charles starts walking back towards the track with yn following.

“Yeah. It’s a lot of fun,” she answers as she opens a can of the regular Red Bull, "I'm excited to see who set all of this up though” she looks ahead and takes a sip of the can.

“I can’t wait for you to see who arranged it,” he says. And that’s all he says. Yn tries to get more clues about who it is, but Charles’ mouth is shut. He’s not letting anything slip. And they arrive at Red Bull way earlier than yn was expecting so she doesn't get nearly enough time to interrogate Charles about who it is. 

“I see you’ve come to terms with the fact Red Bull is the best.” Max teases as Charles and yn are within hearing range of a normal voice. While holding a bouquet of flowers?

“Ha ha ha,” Charles smiles, as he hands Max the basket full of red bull cans, “I’m just keeping yn company, and decided to return these as I won’t be able to drink them.” Charles laughs and gets into a conversation with Max until yn clears her throat, reminding them she’s still there.

“I’m looking for a clue,” she says, begging that it's close to being over because she’s tired of walking from one side of the track to another over and over.

“Oh right,” Max hands her the bouquet of flowers he was holding. She takes them in her hand and her eyebrows furrow.

“What kind of clue is this?” She looks at Max whose eyes go wide.

“I forgot this.” He pulls a letter out from his pocket and hands it to her.

“Another letter. Is this the last one? I don't know how much more walking I can do.” She looks so defeated but reads the note.

“If you received this letter, that means you figured out all the clues. I know you were just there, but you can find me on Charles’ yacht. Where the big surprise is waiting.”

She looks up as she finishes reading. “He’s got to be kidding. I swear to fucking god, if this is George and he just made me walk from that yacht, back to the track and then back to that stupid yacht i’m going to go insane.” You look back at the letter. 

“My yacht isn’t stupid.” Charles pouts as Max hits him on the arm. “Ow?”

Yn sighs, “I guess I’ll get going. Thanks for the flowers I suppose.” 

“Oh they were not from me. They were from him. Just hurry up,” Max looks down at his phone, “practice starts kinda soon, and he can’t be late.” Yn starts walking back towards the yacht. She can't wait to kill the man that made her walk this much.

Lando however has been setting everything up ever since yn and Charles left. Strawberries covered in chocolate, and since he doesn't like chocolate, strawberries without chocolate, candles on a small table on the sun deck. As yn gets closer, Lando walks down to greet her. “I swear to fucking god George if this is yo-” her sentence gets cut short as soon as she sees Lando. “You set all of this up?”

“Yeah. You didn’t seem to like it that much?” Lando rubs the back of his neck. He wasn’t the best planner of a scavenger hunt.

“I kinda wasn’t the biggest fan of walking all the way out here, back to the track and then back here again.” She crosses her arms, but seeing the concerned look on Lando’s face she relaxes her arms and walks onto the yacht with a huge smile. “It was still kinda fun.” 

They spend a little while on the boat, sitting with their feet almost touching the ocean. Lando is not really sure if he should put an arm around her or not. He decides not to move too quickly and they just sit next to each other. “Oh I almost forgot,” she turns and looks at Lando. “I was supposed to tell you to hurry up, practice starts soon and you can’t be late,” she looks down at the strawberries, “but you distracted me.”

“Oh shit!” He gets up quickly and puts his shoes on, “meet me at the track! I would love to spend some time with you between practice 1 and 2!” He hurries up and practically runs all the way to the track.

~~~

For the next couple of weeks Lando spends a lot of time wondering how quickly to move forward. They spend a lot of time sitting near water, almost like the first time, except they don't have access to Charles' yacht every day. Every time Lando wonders if he should put an arm around her, but he never does. Until one day, when they’ve been sitting at the end of the gangway on the dock, their feet so close to the water, if they stretched them out their toes would be dipped in the water, and Lando’s arm comes closer and closer to making its way around yn. “Just do it already,” she says and leans on him, putting her head on his shoulder, “I've been waiting for the last many weeks for you to do it.” Lando can’t help but let out a small laugh and put his arm around her. 

“I wasn’t sure if you even wanted it.” He looks down at her quickly before looking back at the water. 

“I've been waiting for you to make some sort of move, so I knew if it would be appropriate to do this.” She says, as she sits back up straight and puts her hands on Lando’s cheeks and pulls his face closer. He puts his hands on her waist and pulls her closer while making sure none of them fall into the water. Her lips meet his softly, a tentative brush that sends a wave of electricity through her body. The kiss deepened, growing in confidence, and everything else faded away. All that existed was the two of them.

When they finally break apart, Lando puts his forehead against hers, a smile stuck on his face. He would never be able to forget this moment, and she wouldn’t either. “I’ve dreamed of this moment ever since that time Charles invited you to lunch.” Lando shares, not aware that yn has shared the same feeling since he shared that he had feelings for her.

“I was sure you’d do something about it sooner.” Yn lets out a small laugh and leans against Lando’s shoulder as he puts his arm around her.

“I was too afraid you didn't want to,” he says and lets out a sigh. “And I guess I just never thought to just ask.” 

“Well, you should have.” She smiles, before looking up at him, and he can’t help but smile back. They sit like that for a while. Just enjoying each other's company.

~~~

A couple weeks later, when they’re lying on the couch in Lando’s apartment, watching a movie, yn can’t help but smile, thinking about this moment, and how she never thought this would be a reality in her life. “Can you believe it?” She says in a soft whisper, her voice barely even audible.

“Believe what?” Lando asks, while his other hand mindlessly runs through the soft strands of her hair.

“This. Us. I never thought I’d be in such a happy relationship while traveling so much.” She says, softly tracing small circles on the back of his hand, that’s draped across her waist.

“Well I’m glad you're happy,” He says, placing a kiss on the top of her head, earning a soft hum from the woman. “You know, you could bring some stuff here. Just enough for a drawer if you don’t want to get too serious.” He mumbles, nuzzling his head into the crook of her neck.

She can’t help but smile, because she had been thinking of asking. “That would be nice, especially considering how much time I spend here.” She brings his hand up to her lips and places a soft kiss there, before going back to the movie.

~~~

It didn't take long for her to basically move in. It wasn’t official, but it might as well have been. She spent more time there than she did at her own home. But Lando didn’t mind. In fact, he loved having her there. They even started spending time together publicly, whether that was around Monaco when it wasn’t a race week, or if it was in the paddock. The fans had noticed how close they had gotten, and speculation quickly began. Were they a couple? Just friends? No one knew. Did Fred? No. But he wasn’t stupid, he knew something was going on, but he didn’t want to ask. But he didn’t mind, as long as yn was happy. And she was, for the first couple of months. And then it seemed like Lando had other priorities. Of course she knew racing was important to him, and she didn’t expect to suddenly be on the absolute top of his priority list, that would always be F1 and she knew that. However, that didn’t stop the feeling of neglect starting to spread through her. She knew he had a packed schedule, but she would often find herself wishing he had more time for her, yet it just seemed he got less and less time for her.

As the relationship between them progresses, small arguments make it to the surface. Usually sparked by the fact yn feels unimportant, or that Lando misses a date or an anniversary. It’s never his intention, and he always makes it clear that he loves her, but as it continues to get worse and worse, she begins to question it. She even stops believing him 100%.

It was 2 am. Lando had just returned back to the hotel after the race in Singapore. He silently opened the door to the room he was sharing with yn, expecting her to already be sound asleep on the bed, but to his surprise she was sitting up, leaning against the headboard with the bedside lamp on.

“Can we talk?” She asks, her voice soft but filled with a hint of vulnerability.

“Of course.” Lando quickly closes the door and walks over to sit on the edge of the bed.

“Look, I know racing is extremely important to you, that it’s everything to you, but,” she pauses for a moment, not really sure how he’s going to take this. “What about us?” She asks, her voice shaking slightly.

“I know it’s been tough, and I’ve not been the best, but I’m under a lot of pressure right now,” Lando looks up at her and he can see the way his words hurt, and he can’t help the defensive tone that creeps into his voice. “I didn’t have a choice.”

“Didn’t have a choice? You’ve always had a choice! You chose to sign up for all those PR events. All the additional promotional videos. Do you know how it feels to always be the last thing on your mind?” Her voice raises a little as the frustration takes over, and she searches Lando’s eyes for a reaction, just some sort of reaction.

“I never wanted you to feel that way,” Lando sighs and looks her in the eye, he genuinely never wanted her to feel like she was his last priority. “But this is my career, it’s what I’ve worked towards my entire life.” 

“And where do I fit into that? When you talk about your future, you’re talking about your next race, the next podium, the next win. I can’t continue to just sit back and wait for you to finally have time for me. I can’t continue to just be a spectator in your life, Lando.” The hurt is visible on her face, and she turns away momentarily to look out the window. The rain is subtly falling outside, and small drops of water roll down the window.

“I thought you understood when we got together.” He says, trying to defend himself. “This is my life, my dream. I never wanted you to feel like you're not important.” His voice softens, but his tone is still defensive as he tries to avoid addressing the core issue.

“I did understand. And I’ve been nothing but supportive, but it’s been months of you forgetting a date, or something else. And I’m not asking you to quit racing, I would never do that. All I’m asking is that I become a priority too. Because right now it feels like you’ve made a choice. And it’s not me.” Tears start to swell up in yn's eyes, and Lando is at a loss for words. He never wanted it to get to this point, but he doesn’t know what to say. He looks away, and that’s the last straw for yn. She swings her legs off the bed and grabs her suitcase that she packed as soon as she returned from the race, since they were planning to leave early in the morning anyway. “I’ll give you some time to think about all of this. But I won’t be waiting forever. Figure out if this is something you want. Because I can’t keep doing this.” And with those words she leaves the hotel room, and into the elevator.

She walks out into the rain, with tears flowing freely from her eyes. She stops and takes a deep breath. She doesn’t want it to end between her and Lando, but she also can’t continue to just be a bystander in her own relationship. As she grabs her suitcase and is about to begin walking she hears Landos voice. “Wait!” 

She turns around and sees him walking in long strides toward her, the rain already drenching his hair. “I don't want to lose you. I’ll never leave you alone again,” he says as he reaches her. “I remember how it felt when we were sitting by the water on our first unofficial date. Every time I look at you, it’s like I’m seeing you for the first time all over again. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” He places a hand on her cheek and gently rubs his thumb along her cheekbones. “Please don’t leave. We’ll make it work. I’ll make time for you. You’ll be my first priority, I promise.”

She looks up at him with an aching heart at the raw emotion in his voice. For a moment she wants to believe him, to just forget all the missed moments, but the pain is still too much. 

“You say that now, but what happens when life gets busy again?” She asks in a whisper, her voice shaking as she speaks. “What happens when I become the last thing on your mind again because something else takes priority?”

Lando’s hand trembles slightly against her cheek, but he doesnt pull away, and neither does she. The rain falls a little harder, and their breaths are visible in the cool air of the night.

“I won't let that happen.” His voice is filled with an urgency, a need, that she’s never heard before. “I know i’ve failed you, but this time-”

“”This time,” she interrupts him and takes a step back, resulting in his hand slipping from her cheek. “How do I know this time is any different?” She looks at him with tearfilled eyes, waiting for an answer she might not want. But it doesn’t come. Instead, Lando takes a step closer and his eyes are filled with so much love and hope.

“Because this time, I know what it’s like to lose you,” his voice is trembling and he pauses for a moment, searching for the right words. “And I can’t. I can't lose you.”

[shriveled-grape]

Thinking about Ratio and Owl courtship behaviors.

Just because. They’re on the mind.

Bringing food

While it’s my personal opinion that Aventurine eats breakfast and dinner (at the very least because of his cakes), I think he overlooks lunch quite frequently. He just doesn’t feel hungry until his stomach is screeching at him to eat. It’s just one of those things—it’s a ‘okay, we actually have a stable food source’ thing.

Still—not a very good habit to overlook. It’s not like he’s doing anything to help it either, no alarm or anything. Just looking at the clock and going ‘well shit lunch was a while ago… whoopsies might as well wait till I get home’. (I don’t think Aventurine wants to take his work home, if he’s off the clock he’s off and Qiploth help the poor IPC worker that has to contact him outside work hours if he’s needed—so, he’d rather continue his workflow instead of risking going over his hours.)

While I’m not entirely sure how this habit will get picked up on (perhaps there’s frequent meetings with the IPC before lunch hours and rather than make his way to the lunch area, Aventurine is making his way back to his office.

“Gambler, the lunch room is this way.”

Immediate heel turn. “Inviting me to eat with you, Ratio?” Suddenly he’s extremely aware he’s hungry.

Eats like a man starved.)

but Ratio picks it up one way or another. He goes about it indirectly (for the most part), either striking up a dialogue that requires Aventurine to accompany him to the lunch room or finding a reason to be in Aventurine’s office with (coincidentally) more food than Ratio is able to consume and an extra set of utensils because ‘reheating the food won’t taste the same, and they say a good meal is better with company’ (sounds like bs — the latter part not the former, but Aventurine doesn’t comment on it because hey—more time with his favorite doctor).

Eventually this becomes habit. Ratio bringing Aventurine to a food source (the lunch room, or perhaps a nearby cafe/restaurant/etc) or bringing him food. It’s—ha—a gamble. One that Aventurine looks forward to everyday around lunch time.

Cheek-to-Cheek nuzzling

Of course, this one would be when there’s an actual relationship. This one feels more private/intimate so really it’s saved for when they’re both alone together.

The first time it happens is when they’re both in bed together, not exactly cuddling but still being in each other’s arms. Aventurine’s on his phone, Ratio’s reading an (exceedingly long) book. (I wonder if Ratio would read like Reid from criminal minds… anyways—.)

It’s a spontaneous thing. Ratio kisses Aventurine’s cheek SOFTLY (extremely important.) then turns his head and rubs his cheek against Aventurine’s before turning back to his book.

Aventurine’s stunned for a bit, processing if that. Really just happened. He’s not complaining of course! He’s just. Confused. A bit. His cheeks are warmed up now, but he just laughs a bit.

“Never did I think you’d be so touchy, Ratio.”

“Heh.”

That’s it. That’s the entire exchange that just makes Aventurine roll his eyes with a smile before going back to his phone.

It becomes a mutual thing after that. Before one of them heads off to work, when one gets home, when they wake, before they sleep, or just spontaneous. Just like the first time.

Preening

Humans don’t have pin feathers (I would. I would hope.) so I’m going about this a couple of ways.

Ratio trying to smooth down stray hairs on Aventurine’s head. Say it’s the middle of a work day that Ratio happens to be there and he notices some hair frizz on Aventurine’s head that he smooths down. (Doesn’t stop his conversation just reaches over and smooths it down like he’s not doing anything out of the ordinary. Aventurine: ?????? Lol okay???). Or before Aventurine leaves for work Ratio fixes a couple strands before sending him on his way.

A thought that came to me is Aventurine getting a cowlick whenever it rains on the back of his head. Ratio continually trying to smooth. It. Down. But it just doesn’t want to. It frustrates him and Aventurine can’t leave the house until it’s tamed. (This is how you know he loves this man because it’s setting the time he has to finish his workload back either 30 mins to an hour). Prior to their relationship, Aventurine would’ve just worn his hat, but now that’s only if the doctor has given up… which is extremely rare.

The last way is through Ratio absentmindedly twisting (rubbing???) strands of Aventurine’s hair between his index and thumb (much like a human would preen a bird’s feathers). This is easier if they’re laying somewhere together (if Aventurine is the one holding him he simply reaches behind him). This method is a comfort thing, me thinks.

Aventurine thinks it’s cute.

Hooting duets

For this one, I think is the silliest. Because it’s just them going back and forth with each other.

They’re bantering!! And it’s subconsciously Ratio’s love language (except it’s only. With Aventurine).

Aventurine keeps him on his toes and gives wit that parallels Ratio’s that sometimes leaves him speechless before he composes himself (this is unprecedented. If there are people in attendance they are shocked. Well, for the first couple times).

They don’t shut up if they’re with each other, this only heightens when they are actually together… which honestly isn’t a big change.

This is the courtship that lets everyone know Ratio is interested in Aventurine (in some way, they aren’t sure what for a good while) … except Aventurine.

Everyone sees them pining. And it. HURTS.

But yeah, that’s what I got…

This was supposed to be a short thing……

[beenbaanbuun]

stars w/ choi jongho

a lake in a forest is where you lie, the soft sand of the shore acting as your mattress, your boyfriend’s chest your pillow. the icy water laps tentatively as your toes, keeping you from slipping into a slumber from which you’re unsure that you’ll ever want to wake. why would you wish to go back to real life when falling asleep in your lovers arms is all you ever want to do?

his heart ticks away in his chest, pointlessly keeping the time like a grandfather clock in an abandoned house. you don’t need to know the time right now, the moon and the stars that hang high above your heads is enough to tell you that it’s late, and you should go inside. as you cast a glance up to jongho’s face, bathed in the silvery tendrils of the moon’s light, you couldn’t quite care less about what you should do. you want to stay here in this moment forever, and you’ll be damned if you let it slip from you so easily.

“i can feel you staring at me,” he hums, the hand that cups your head to his chest moving slightly to ruffle your hair. in any normal circumstance, you’d shove his hand away with a scoff, firing a snarky comment in his direction that would make his face light up in a pretty smile. the circumstances are anything but normal, though; you’d rather give up the sun than the feeling that currently spreads through your body like a wildfire.

“you’re just so beautiful,” your voice can barely be heard over the rustling of the leaves and the crackle of the sand beneath the soft swelling of the water. it’s almost like you’re afraid your voice will drown it all out, as if this is all a dream and talking too loud will wake you and pull you back to reality. silence is better than go back to your hectic life. you’d make this dream last forever if the universe would let you.

when he tilts his head in a way that lets him gaze upon you, you find the breath being stolen from your lungs. oh well, you tell yourself; it’s hard to care about something so insignificant as breathing when the most important thing in the world is looking upon you with the universe in his eyes. the stars in the sky have nothing on those endless pools of chocolate; they reflect the moonlight in a way that hypnotises you, and while you weren’t planning on looking away in the first place, now you feel certain that you can’t.

“i thought you wanted to stargaze,” his voice comes out in a playful purr, a small grin taking hold of his expression. you mirror it with a smile of your own, smaller and far gentler, but a smile nonetheless. it’s hard to keep it hidden when jongho’s joy is so infectious; with his gums peaking out from beneath his lip, his nose scrunched up so sweetly he looks… precious.

“you’re prettier than the stars,” you say. he hums in mock agreement and you realise that even his teasing is enough to make your body fill to the brim with fireworks. just the tiniest amount of attention from his is enough to make you feel like you’re falling in love over and over again, your heart tripping and stumbling each and every time he so much as looks in your direction. damn the butterflies, there’s a whole aviary inside of your stomach right now.

“if i’m prettier than the stars then you must be prettier than anything else the universe has to offer,” a careful finger brushes against your cheek bone, working its way up to your temple where it pushes a stray strand of hair to the side. your face scrunches up instinctively as it trails ticklishly against your skin to which jongho lets out a slight giggle. it harmonises with the sounds of the wilderness that surrounds you creating the perfect symphony. all music, past and future could only dream of sounding so perfect. “can i kiss you?” his smooth voice slotting right into that already perfect song, “i really want to kiss you right now.”

you nod; of course you do. all you ever want to do is kiss jongho. morning, afternoon, night, it’s all you ever think about. soft lips on yours, sturdy hands roaming your body, gentle tongue probing your mouth. from the moment he gave you a kiss for the first time, bending down as his hands tilted your head to the perfect angle, you spend all day dreaming of when another will come. whether it’s a chaste one before he heads to work in the morning, or a lazy one as he distracts you from whatever it is he’s burning on the stove. each of them is special and you want each of them infinitely.

and when he finally puts his lips to yours, everything seems to slot into place. you’re no longer worried about the real world; that doesn’t exist anymore. it’s just you and him and the stars as your only witness.

[meazalykov]

my love is back home

sydney lohmann x actress!reader

summary: after being away to film movies and do press tours, you know where home is

love, closed distance

it’s been months since you’ve last seen sydney. 

between her football schedule and your intense filming commitments in the united states, the days felt like they blurred into one long stretch of distance.

the time zone differences, the constant travel, the late-night calls that sometimes ended in one of you falling asleep mid-conversation—it was all part of the routine now. 

but even with all of that, you wouldn’t change a thing. both of you had dreams to chase, careers that demanded your full attention, and somehow, you’d made it work. 

you remember how it all started, how you met sydney through laura—your mutual friend. laura had always teased that sydney was the perfect mix of soft and strong, and at the time, you didn’t think much of it. but when you finally met her, everything clicked. 

you admired her instantly—her dedication to football, her quiet confidence, the silliness in her personality, and the way she could make you feel at ease even on the most chaotic days. 

your schedules were never easy, but there was something about sydney that made all the juggling worth it. 

now, sitting in the stadium in paris, your heart beats a little faster just thinking about her. sydney and the german national team had made it all the way to the bronze medal match at the olympics, and here you are, doing everything you can to surprise her. 

filming had wrapped up just a couple of days ago in los angeles, and the moment you could, you were on a flight back to europe. you thought about heading straight home to munich, where the two of you share a home, but something pulled you toward paris. 

this moment was too big, too important to miss. 

the atmosphere in the stadium is electric, fans from all over the world– especially spanish and german fans– buzzing with excitement, but you’re trying your best to stay lowkey. with a cap pulled low over your face and sunglasses obscuring your features, you hope that most people will overlook you. 

but, of course, they don’t. whispers of your name float around you, people nudging each other, pointing in your direction. some even snap a few photos discreetly. you do your best to smile politely but avoid drawing attention.

after all, this moment isn’t about you—it’s about sydney and everything she’s worked so hard to achieve.

you’ve positioned yourself with sydney’s family, sharing nervous smiles and quiet conversations about the match. her parents are beaming with pride, and it warms your heart to be here with them, to share in this special moment. they’re sweet people.

sydney introduced you to them around two years ago, not long after the both of you started dating. her mother recognized you from a movie she loved years ago so she was happy to meet you. the lohmann parents treat you as one of their own, and are happy to see you back.

when the match starts, you’re on the edge of your seat, watching every move, every pass, your eyes glued to the pitch. 

then, when sydney comes on, you can’t help yourself—you cheer loudly, her name slipping from your lips before you can even think about it.

your voice carries over the noise of the crowd, and for a split second, you see her pause on the field. her head turns slightly, like she’s trying to figure out if she really heard what she thinks she did, but then she refocuses, too locked into the game to dwell on it.

you laugh to yourself, leaning back in your seat, your heart swelling with pride. she’s always so focused, so driven, and it’s one of the many things you love about her. 

you know she’d never let anything—especially the thought of you possibly being in the stands—distract her from the task at hand. the match is tense, both teams fighting tooth and nail for that bronze medal, but when spain misses a crucial penalty, the entire stadium erupts in cheers for germany. 

you jump up from your seat, clapping and shouting, adrenaline rushing through you as the final whistle blows.

sydney and her teammates are celebrating on the field, hugging, laughing, some even shedding a few tears of joy. your heart feels like it might burst with how happy you are for her. she’s worked so hard for this moment, and to see her here, to know that she’s walking away with a medal—it’s everything. 

you watch her from a distance as she runs toward her teammates and the coaching staff, but it’s not long before she starts making her way toward her family. you’re standing with them, tucked behind her parents, when her eyes scan the crowd and finally land on you. 

the second she sees you, her face lights up in disbelief. yes, you’re wearing sunglasses and a brown dodgers hat, but your girlfriend recognizes your silhouette and casual outfits. 

her smile grows impossibly wide, and before you know it, she’s running toward you, her eyes filled with nothing but joy.

“y/n?!” she gasps, her voice full of surprise and excitement as she pulls you into a tight hug, lifting you off the ground just a little since she is still on the grass. 

“you’re here?”

you laugh, wrapping your arms around her neck and holding her close. 

“of course i’m here. i wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

“i can’t believe it,” she whispers, burying her face in your shoulder for a moment before pulling back just enough to look at you. 

“how long have you been here? why didn’t you tell me?”

“i wanted it to be a surprise,” you grin, brushing a strand of hair away from her face. 

“besides, this is your moment. i didn’t want to steal the spotlight.”

sydney shakes her head, her smile softening as she holds you a little tighter. “you could never steal the spotlight, y/n.”

without another word, she presses her lips to yours, right there in front of everyone—her family, her teammates, the cameras, the fans. none of it matters in this moment. 

all that matters is that you’re here, and she’s home again, in your arms. you feel her relax against you, her fingers threading through your hair as she deepens the kiss, and you can’t help but smile into it. when she finally pulls back, her eyes are bright with tears she’s trying to hold back.

“you’re finally home,” she murmurs, her forehead resting against yours. “i’ve missed you so much.”

“i’ve missed you too,” you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. “and i’m home now. no more long shoots, no more late-night calls from different time zones… it’s just us, at least for a little while.”

she lets out a soft laugh, pulling you back into another hug. “i don’t care if it’s just for a little while. i’ll take whatever time i can get with you.”

the two of you stand there for a moment, wrapped up in each other, oblivious to the world around you. it feels like a weight has been lifted off your chest now that you’re finally back together. 

you’re home—not just in the sense of being back in europe, but in the sense that sydney is your home. wherever she is, that’s where you belong.

“so,” she starts, pulling back just slightly to look at you again, her eyes twinkling with curiosity. 

“how did filming go? how’s the big movie?”

“it went well,” you shrug, feeling the excitement of the past few months starting to settle in. 

“it was a lot of work, but it’s done. we wrapped a few days ago.”

“and now you’re back to me,” she grins, leaning in to kiss you again, softer this time, more tender. “i can’t believe you came all this way just to see me play.”

“of course i did,” you say, your voice full of affection. 

“you deserve this, syd. you deserve everything. i’m so proud of you.”

her smile widens, and she pulls you in close again, her arms wrapped around your waist. “and i’m so proud of you too. my superstar girlfriend.”

you laugh, shaking your head. “please, you’re the superstar here. you just won a bronze medal!”

“yeah,” she laughs, her cheeks flushing slightly. “i did, didn’t i?”

“you did,” you smile, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “and you deserve it. you deserve the world.”

as sydney greets her family and the celebration continues around you, you find yourself feeling more at peace than you have in months. 

being with sydney, standing beside her in this moment—it feels right. you’ll always find your way back to her. because at the end of the day, she’s your home. and nothing will ever change that.

masterlist

[wiltedflowerpetals]

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John Price is a lot of things. A soldier. A leader. The captain of Task Force 141. And, of course, (Y/N) Price's husband. They are so much in love, in fact, that after a year of dating, John asked her to marry him. But even lovers have secrets... Because John's lovely wife wasn't just a sweet wife with a boring office job. No. She was a killer. A hitman. One of the best...

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It's my first cod fic... I hope it's good. Thank you for reading and I wish you all a great day! x3

Words: 2259

Warning: fluff, a bit angsty

You wiped a bead of sweat from your brow as you entered the quiet sanctuary of your home. You placed your weapons carefully in your hidden compartment beneath the floorboards of the closet, where John would never think to look. It was almost laughable, really. Your husband, John Price, a man who had dedicated his life to fighting criminals, had no idea that his wife was one of those killers.

You closed the closet door and took a deep breath. This was your life, your choice, long before you even met John. He didn't need to know about your job. All he needed to know was that you were here, waiting for him, just like you always were. You took another deep breath and needed to switch gears, to become the version of yourself that he knew and loved.

After you took a shower and put on some comfy clothes, you decided to cook your husband’s favorite food. You moved around the kitchen, preparing it as the aroma of simmering stew filled the air.

Your phone buzzed on the kitchen counter. A text from Kate Laswell. A good friend of yours.

You smiled before swiping the screen to answer the call.

“(Y/N).” Kate greeted you. She sounded professional, as always, but with a bit of warmth.

“Kate.” You replied. “How did it go?”

“Smoothly. The target is dead, and our friend is safe for now. You did a good job out there.”

“Thanks.” You said, leaning against the counter, watching the stew. “What’s next?”

“Next?” You heard her chuckle. “Next, I’m coming over.”

You raised your eyebrow, stirring the pot. “You're sure about this, Kate?”

“What, afraid to see me in broad daylight?” You rolled your eyes at her. “Yes, John invited me. He’s been telling me for ages about how good your cooking is. How could I refuse?”

You sighed. “I’m a great cook… But, Kate, you know how important it is that John doesn’t find out about… you know.”

“I know.” Kate reassured you. “I won’t say a word. He has no idea we know each other, and it’ll stay that way.” Silence filled the conversation. “But he’s bound to find out. You have to talk to him one day.”

You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “I know and I will do it… One day. It’s just… I don’t want him getting involved in my shit. If he knew what I really do…”

“I understand…” Kate said softly. “And I promise, your secret’s safe with me.”

“Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow then.” You sighed and rolled your eyes as the line went dead before you could say more. You placed the phone back on the counter.

“You could have said bye, Kate.”

It wasn’t that you didn’t trust your husband; it was that you couldn’t bear the thought of him being in danger. You’d lied to him for years, all to protect him. And so far, it had worked.

°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。

The front door opened. John was home. You turned, wiping your hands on a towel as he entered the kitchen, his face lighting up when he saw you.

“Hey, love.” He greeted, his voice gruff but full of affection.

“John.” You smiled, walking over to him. He pulled you into a tight embrace, burying his face in your hair. The scent of sweat, gunpowder, cigars and earth clung to him, a reminder of the world he lived in, the world you knew perfectly well…

“Missed you.” He murmured against your neck.

“I missed you too.” You replied, your voice soft. You kind of did. Can you miss someone that you see so often? Even when your husband went on missions, you were there, watching his back and saving his life more times than you could count.

You always went there to safe him. For Kate and for yourself.

You pulled back, giving him a soft kiss on his dry lips. He was safe. That was all that mattered.

“You’re just in time for dinner.”

John watched you with a smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “You spoil me, you know that?”

“Someone has to.” You teased, setting the plates on the table. “Sit down. I’ll get everything.”

He obeyed. You placed a steaming plate in front of him and joined him at the table. You two ate in comfortable silence.

John leaned back in his chair, looking at you with a satisfied grin. "You’ve outdone yourself, love."

“I’m glad you liked it.” You replied, gathering the dishes. He grabbed your hand, stopping you.

“Leave it.” He said. “I’ll do it later.”

You smiled, but shook your head. “Let me help then.” John offered, but you shook your head again.

“No, you go take a shower. I’ve got this.”

He didn’t need much convincing. “Alright, but only because you insist.”

He pressed a kiss to your temple, before you watched him head towards the bathroom.

The next day arrived too quickly…

°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。

You woke up early and ready to prepare breakfast. John was still asleep, his arm draped over your side of the bed, the peaceful expression on his face making your heart ache with affection.

You moved quietly, not wanting to wake him just yet. He needed his rest, especially after the mission he’d just returned from. You poured yourself a cup of coffee and sipped it slowly, savoring the moment.

As you finished up, John stumbled into the kitchen, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

“Morning, love.” He mumbled, reaching for you. You stepped into his embrace, pressing a kiss to his chest.

“Morning.” You replied, your voice soft. “Breakfast is almost ready.”

“Smells amazing.” he said, pulling back to look at you.

You two sat on the table, eating your delicious food as John intertwined his fingers with yours.

“Soo…” John started, as you finished your food.

“Soo?” You glanced at him, squeezing his hand.

“A friend of mine wanted to visit us. You, know the friend I’ve mentioned a couple of times? Kate?” You nod your head, feeling a slight twinge of anxiety in your stomach. “Yeah, she will come… Is it okay? Or should I call her back and-“

You shook your head. “No, no, honey. It’s okay. She can come.” Despite her promise, there was still a small part of your that worried, that he will find out about your job.

John smiled at your, happy that you were fine with it and finally could meet his friend.

And due to your nervosity, you start to cook early on for dinner. For the time Kate will come into your home. You prayed and hoped that everything will work out…

John noticed your nervosity, of course. He always did. “You’re fussing too much.” He teased as he leaned against the kitchen counter, watching you.

“I’m not fussing.” You rolled your eyes, but could hear the tension in your own voice. “I just want everything to be perfect…”

“It will be.” John assured you, moving to wrap his arms around you from behind. “Kate’s going to love you. She’s always been curious about the woman who managed to snag me.”

You laughed, though the sound was a bit strained. John kissed the side of your neck, his beard scratching gently against your skin. “Don’t worry, love.”

The doorbell rang and you felt your heart leap into your throat. This was it…

John released you, heading for the door. “That’ll be Kate.” He said.

You quickly wiped your hands on a towel, trying to steady your breathing as you followed him. When the door swung open, there stood Kate Laswell, dressed casually but with her usual air of quiet authority.

“Kate, good to see you.” John greeted warmly.

“Good to see you too, John.” Kate replied with a smile, glancing over his shoulder at you.

You stepped forward, a perfectly practiced look of curiosity and friendliness on her face. It was time to act. Something that you always had to do during your missions. Acting or more likely… lying…

“You must be Kate. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“And you must be (Y/N).” Kate responded. “John wasn’t exaggerating when he said you’re beautiful.”

You rolled your eyes at the false pleasantries, but at least your friend had some fun. This was the game you two had to play after all. “Thank you. Come in, please.”

As Kate stepped inside, John closed the door behind her, looking pleased. He had no idea that the two women had known each other for a long time already.

They moved to the dining room, where you had already set the table. The conversation flowed easily, John and Kate reminiscing about old missions, with you chiming in here and there, careful to keep up the facade of being just a supportive wife with no real connection to their deadly world.

As they ate, John kept looking between the two women. “It’s funny.” He remarked. “I’ve always thought you two would get along great. Glad to see I was right.”

You forced a smile, hoping it didn’t look as strained as it felt. “Well, Kate’s easy to get along with.” You said, but kept your eyes rather on John than on her.

Kate returned the smile, her expression giving nothing away. “And I can see why John speaks so highly of you, (Y/N). You’ve got a real knack for this - hosting, cooking… you’re a natural.”

“… Thank you.” You replied, you were counting down the minutes until this tense dinner was over.

The rest of the evening passed in a blur of small talk and laughter, with John completely oblivious to the undercurrent of tension between the two women. As far as he knew, it was just a pleasant evening with his wife and a close friend.

When it was finally time for Kate to leave, John walked her to the door, thanking her again for coming. You followed, staying a step behind, happy that the day has finally ended.

“Thanks for having me.” Kate said warmly, giving you a meaningful look as she shook your hand. “I hope we can do this again sometime.”

“I would love to.” You replied, your voice steady despite of all the emotions you were feeling right now. “It was lovely meeting you.”

With that, Kate left, and you closed the door, leaning against it for a moment, eyes closed as you let out a slow breath.

John came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. “See? Told you it’d be fine.”

You leaned into his embrace. “You were right.” You admitted, turning in his arms to face him. “It was nice and went better than I thought.”

John smiled down at you. “You did great, love. I knew Kate would like you. But then again, what's not to like?”

You chuckled. “You give me too much credit. But I’m glad she came over. It was… good to finally meet her.”

He kissed your forehead, his lips lingering for a moment. “You know, I think she’ll become a good friend of yours. She’s got a lot of interesting stories, and I’m sure you two have more in common than you think.”

You swallowed hard, forcing a smile on your lips. “Yeah… maybe.”

John’s smile softened as he looked at you. “Are you alright? You seem… distracted.”

You hesitated, your heart skipping a beat. He was always so perceptive. But you couldn’t tell him the truth… Not now, not ever. So, you did what you had done countless times before. You lied… Again.

“Just tired.” You said, resting your head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. “It’s been a long day.”

He held you close, his hand gently stroking your back. “I understand. It’s been a lot. Why don’t we call it a night? You need your rest.”

You nodded, feeling now tired from this day. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

You locked up the house and headed upstairs. As you got ready for bed, you couldn’t help but glance at John, wondering what would happen if he ever found out the truth. How would he react? Would he be angry, hurt, betrayed?

Once you two were in bed, John pulled you close, his arm wrapped protectively over you. He kissed your temple, whispering a soft “Goodnight, love.” before closing his eyes.

You lay there in the darkness, your eyes wide open as you stared at the ceiling. The evening had gone as well as it could have, but the anxiety was still there. Kate’s visit had been a stark reminder of your real life. Your real job.

You turned slightly to watch John sleep; his face peaceful in the light. He had no idea how many times you’d been there, watching over him from the shadows during his missions, making sure he and his team got out alive. You were always just out of sight, never letting anyone know where you were. It was your way of protecting him.

You weren’t sure how long you could keep this up.

But for now, John was safe. He was home, with you, and that was all that mattered.

You reached out, brushing a hand over his cheek, feeling the rough stubble under your fingers. He stirred slightly, but didn’t wake, just leaned into her touch.

“I love you.” You whispered.

It was both a vow and a plea. A promise to keep him safe, and a silent wish that he’d never have to find out the lengths you’d gone to do so.

Eventually, you fell asleep in the arms of your husband.

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© nanamisflowerfield/wiltedflowerpetals. Do not repost, rewrite, plagiarize my work.

[byte-your-tongue]

Sebastian Solace x Crybaby!Reader

(Platonic, GN Reader)

AN: This is actually a repost from my main blog. But i edited it to be more general rather than selfship writing! I haven't written anything that wasn't basic headcanons in a LONG time. So please excuse the first couple ones i do being bad lol.

TW: Blood, gore, violence, vomit, descriptions of injuries, constant talk of an impending death (that doesn't actually happen.)

Run.

That was the only thought coursing through your mind at the moment as you were chased through the halls of the abandoned facility.

You weren't even sure if anything was following you anymore, but your adrenaline fueled brain kept screaming at you to keep moving. And that was where your first mistake lie. You were so caught up in keeping an eye out for flickering lights and sparks coming off fake doors you forgot to pay attention to your other senses.

You couldn't hear anything over your own loud footsteps and heavy breathing, failing to notice the tell tale sign of a wall dweller sneaking up on you until it was nearly too late. You whipped your head around just as the creature struck, scaring it off in the same moment it lunged for your legs.

You let out a loud yelp and stumbled, but refused to break eye contact with the fleeing monster until it was fully gone. And even then you lay on the floor for a minute longer, making sure it wasn't faking its retreat. But when You finally went to pick yourself off the ground your right knee buckled from the injury inflicted by the wall dweller.

Just as you sat down to assess your injuries all the lights in the room flickered, an ominous warning of the Angler approaching. You ground your teeth through the pain and dragged yourself into the nearest locker, slamming the door shut right as the monstrosity roared past.

'Goddammit! I really can't catch a break this time, huh?'

You grimaced as you slowly opened the locker door, switching on your only light source you had managed to find so far: a lantern with half the batteries drained already. It was more likely to anger squiddles, but even after who knows how many failed attempts to retrieve this stupid crystal you still hadn't gotten over your crippling fear of the dark. If anything it's gotten worse during your time down here.

And so you limped along, praying they would be out of this stretch of dark rooms before your light source died out. As you entered through the next door you noted the number: 42. That was important for one reason: Sebastian's shop. Sebastian prefered to hang out further from the entrance that your fellow "expendables" used. Sebastian didn't want to get caught by anyone important enough to pose a real threat, and he wanted to give people time to actually collect enough research to make it worth his effort.

But none of that was important to you right now. At the moment the only thing you cared about was purchasing a med kit and fixing your leg up.

And so you continued limping along, hoping that you would soon hear Sebastian calling out to them.

As you opened the next room, it was finally bright enough to turn off your lantern. It was a long hallway with tall glass windows looking out into the ocean. You moved closer to one, admiring and fearing the inky abyss that stretched seemingly endlessly in every direction.

Your thoughts were cut off abruptly when Eyefestation quickly swam up to the glass, invading your mind with whispers and shouts in a million different voices. You doubled over from the physical and mental assault, vomiting and scrunching his eyes closed.

You slowly crawled along the floor, pain searing through your head, feeling around for the exit with your hands. As your faintly heard the hiss of a door opening the pressure in your mind finally retreated.

Your were definitely worse for wear now. You were nauseous, bleeding, had a splitting headache, had nearly no supplies, and were unable to do anything other than pathetically crawl onwards.

You was convinced you was going to die down here.

Again.

But just a few doors later you heard a quiet voice hiss out at him:

"Hey, over here!"

Sebastian.

Safety.

You quickly located the vent and clawed weakly at the covering, finally getting it loose with a grunt. You dragged yourself through the tight space as you felt your vision dimming.

It was all you could do to finally get into the meager shop before you collapsed fully, your mind and vision going dark as you drifted away into unconciousness. The last thing you heard was a surprisingly panicked shout from Sebastian.

'Ah. He actually cares about me?'

It was the last though you could muster up before finally fully passing out.

...

...

...

It was merely 20 minutes later when you finally awoke, groaning in pain and taking note that your injuries were now bandaged. You looked up to see Sebastian. He was fidgeting with something in his hands, his brow furrowed and the tip of his tail nervously swishing from side to side. As soon as he realized you were awake he perked up and slithered over to you.

"Are you feeling ok? You aren't concussed, right? I bandaged you up and gave you some painkillers, but you really shouldn't take them on an empty stomach so let me know if you have eaten recently."

"Ah..." You slurred your words somewhat, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. "I don't think I got and injuries on my head, so no concussion. And I haven't eaten. How much for some food? And how much do i owe you for the medkit? I don't have that much research on me right now..." You trailed off as you saw Sebastian face shift to annoyance.

"Are you serious?" Sebastian's voice raised and he looked offended. "Do you really think i'd charge you for something like this? How little do you think of me?"

"Oh....." You looked down in embarrassment. "I don't know i just.... i mean i consider you a friend. You're the only safety i have down here and you let me rest in your shop and-" You cut yourself off. "But... but i thought you didn't like me. I thought i was an annoyance..."

You looked down with a sad look on your face as you continued in a small voice:

"I thought.... I thought i was just another expendable to you..."

Sebastian's face was sometimes hard to read, but the look of hurt he wore at that moment was clear as day.

"Y/N...."

'That's the first time he's said my name so softly...'

Sebastian cleared his throat before continuing awkwardly. "I know that... I am not always the most pleasant person to be around. But... I want you to know.. that.. out of everyone down here.. you are someone who i do truly appreciate."

You were stunned for a second. You had only ever heard sebastian either insult you or try to sell you something. The refreshing honesty and compassion in his tone was something you took a second to savor before you finally realized you should respond.

"Sebastian... I'm so glad you like me. I'm so glad you wanna be my friend. It honestly makes me so happy.... I- I-" You trailed off with tears in your eyes. A common sight yet one that managed to shock Sebastian this time around.

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Don't go crying after i just said i appreciate you! Do you really not wanna be my friend that bad!" Sebastian panicked, reaching an arm down to comfort you.

You laughed, your tears starting to dry up as fast as they started. "Noooo! You already said you like me!! You can't take it back now!"

Sebastian playfully jabbed at you with one of his much larger hands. "You're damn right! You're stuck with me now whether you like it or not!" He gave a smile full of sharp teeth, one that used to scare you but was now a comfort to see.

The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a while until you finally broke it.

"Hey... if we're friends now can you tell Painter to stop trying to kill me?"

"Hahaha... I think you'll have to take that one up with Painter yourself."

...

"Dammit...."

[pressplay-if]

I saw that the single mum route is the less angsty when it comes to family stuff. Which is lovely. However, it reminded me of something I was thinking the other day. I was trying to figure out what kind of depressive thoughts my MC may have (as I'm still deciding if he'll have depression or social anxiety). And since I always pick the single mother route (I love the idea of MC being the poor friend of the band), I got some ideas.

Basically, I guess my MC would feel a lot of guilt. He knows that his mother is busy with so much work not out of being a workaholic, but by need. Need that is significantly exacerbated by MC's existence. I do imagine a young MC especially feeling guilty and as a burden to their mum, since the poor woman has to raise them and work full time.

This is further increased as the years come by and MC decides to dedicate their lives to a band. A high reward but high risk kind of job. My MC could easily fail to achieve any major success. And then what? It's very easy to feel guilt. Maybe he should have tried to find a more stable job? Something to help his mother so she can lower her workload significantly?

Then again, I am sure my MC's mother would prefer MC to go after his dreams. So, I imagine, MC is also in a weird position where he also would feel guilt if he didn't pursue the music life. Because he is sure his mother would know, and she would feel bad. His mother could easily blame herself that her child is leaving their dream behind. And my MC couldn't bear such idea. So, he is stuck in a weird limbo.

Of course this may be just me overthinking. But it could be some kind of ideas that my MC could fester on his mind as he grows up. Since it's very easy to go from guilt to be burden, to guilt about existing, and then to decide to remove himself from life as that would, in a way, "fix the problem" (which is not true, of course, since suicide doesn't fix things).

Well, I'll stop rambling. This is perhaps a bit of a downer, so I understand if you prefer to ignore it. In any case this basically comes from me thinking a lot about my MC and this IF.

Why would I ignore it I love long asks. Although it does make me think that perhaps (given the current state of the hospitalization interlude) MC may need more options to describe their depressive thoughts. Bc in the interlude, it's all mostly symptom-based, and there's more screentime to MC getting better than MC experiencing the depression. This is partly for the sake of brevity (I'm worried about the interlude getting to long, given it's just another flashback basically, albeit a really important one). But the MC CAN in fact say they felt like a burden to their single mother in a later decision (not chapter 2, it's when they move out).

[blakbonnet]

HAPPY FOX DAY TO ALL THOSE WHO CELEBRATE! Today's a special special AOTW because our featured author this week is best beloved @asneakyfox 🦊

Fox, I genuinely think you're one of the greatest fandom philosophers of our times, and what you write is so much more than regular old meta. Because we're all playing in the sandbox here and while a lot of us lose sight of canon sometimes, you have all four feet firmly planted in the lovely source material we've been provided with. And you don't stop there, you try to actively engage with the community, especially making sure you are keeping an eye on all the differing opinions. I feel like this is why your thesis resonates so thoroughly with different people--it's not trying to prove a point, it's very 'holmes saw a dead body and ejaculated'. You are just so smart that you make the rest of us smarter, but it's never intimidating to talk to you, and I love love love that I get to read your stories and your thoughts because of this show and this fandom.

Fox, brilliant as ever, agreed to answer a few questions for me:

What's your meta writing process like? Do you think in disparate strings about scenes and then write them down as they come to you OR is it usually a conversation or a thought that eats at you until you sit down and untangle it?

generally i'll be thinking about something, usually because i saw another post (or had a conversation about the show on discord; special shoutout to the crew on @figmentof and @scarrletmoon's servers, and especially to @glamaphonic, anything i've ever said you thought was really insightful probably came out of a dm conversation with glam) and some part of a post about it will start writing itself in my head, and unfortunately once that process starts the only way to stop it is to write it down.

even more unfortunately i never know whether it's all going to flow out easily into a coherent essay right away, or if it'll be one of those things where i write two really good paragraphs that ought to go in the middle section of a post that takes a while to figure out how to structure; i just have to start and see where it goes. some meta i've written that got lots of notes was written all at once the moment the thought struck me and posted as soon as it was done, but there's also a few that have been sitting in drafts for months as i keep rewriting the same section without being sure where it goes next.

Favourite themes or characterisations you like to explore while meta writing? (things like Ed's fisherman era and what led to it, etc)

i guess if there's a big theme i keep coming back to it's ed's character arc over the course of the show, his relationship with violence and how it affects his perception of himself and how he has to grow through that to be ready to commit to his relationship with stede. one of the very first things i ever said about the show on tumblr, way back in summer 2022, was that ed's absolute deepest fear was that he is fundamentally unlovable, so it was really a delight to see s2 dive so hard into addressing the exact issues i'd been looking at so explicitly. and of course there's also a lot of fandom racism that plays into some takes that go around about ed, and i think it's really important to call that out and push back against those takes.

i feel like it would be kind of silly to not call out izzy here too. izzy plays an absolutely crucial role in highlighting those exact issues in ed's arc, and i honestly just think the way their whole relationship develops in canon is deliciously meaty and a lot of fandom takes seem determined to flatten it out into something much more boring. so it's important to me to try to highlight the ways you don't have to pretend izzy was a secret good guy all along to appreciate the role he plays in the story.

finally i guess this has only developed over the last several months but i guess one of my trademarks now is speculation about what got deleted from s2. i've always been good at the game of watching a movie and guessing at scenes that were cut or changed, and my spider-sense for that was going off like crazy as i watched s2, and i didn't want to get too speculative at first, but as information has actually come out from samba and vico and other sources, a lot of it's lined up with what i thought. and i'm really interested in how the ofmd writers' room approached storybreaking, so it's worth it to me to try to understand this.

Whose head is it easier to get into - Ed or Stede? Why?

i guess i already answered this! i love them both a lot, and i'd been writing meta for a good while before i consciously realized i'd written a LOT more about ed than about stede, and the ed posts tend to be individually longer than the stede ones too. i think some of this is because ed's arc reads super clearly to me while stede, despite being the main character, gets an arc that's a lot more subtle and internal in some ways (and also i do think suffered significantly from the cuts to the second half of s2). and some of it's because people can be Wrong On The Internet about ed in ways i feel the need to push back against more than about stede. but some of it's just, you know, vibe.

it's always interesting to me that nearly all prolific fic authors in this fandom have a clear very strong preference for which POV they prefer - i don't think all fandoms are like that - but i guess my own alignment is obvious.

Your personal favourite thing you've written that you'd like more people to read

the obvious answer here is the one actual fic i have written for this fandom, "Nothing Could Touch It" which came out of thinking about how there's some post-s2 fic about ed reckoning with this relationship with izzy that i really like but none of it quite got at how i feel like canon's framing it. (don't worry it's not all about izzy! stede's there and there's a bunch of cuddling!)

as far as meta goes though i would call out this as the one i'm probably proudest of, this is the one where i most completely tried to lay out how i saw the show framing ed's relationship with violence during the s1 hiatus, and i think after s2 it holds up pretty well. but also since i was just talking about how i don't say enough about stede, this is the post where i tried to lay out the stuff i really admire in stede as a character.

What is the one word that you think you use a lot?

i've got a bunch of verbal tics i overuse but the one i'm self-conscious about in meta lately is "reading against the text," which sounds so pretentious and lit-crit i really wish there were another good phrase for it. but i think it's really useful as a way to clarify that sometimes i'm saying a particular take is clearly not how the narrative of ofmd is framing something but that doesn't mean you need to stop interpreting it that way. reading against the text is really fun and i recommend it sometimes! but you'll have more fun if you're aware that's what you're doing!

If you were writing his arc, keeping in mind that he stays largely antagonistic in line with the show, how would you have resolved the Izzy problem: would you have made the same decisions the writers made and written a redemption by death OR do you think that the spirit of the show specifically demands Izzy get a good guy (or not as bad a guy) ending where we see his muppetification

one of the predictions i was most confident of before s2 was that if izzy were redeemed, he wouldn't be able to remain in the cast as a good-guy crew muppet afterward. (for this reason i thought the likeliest possibility was a slower redemption arc that wouldn't fully complete till the end of s3.) several times i tried to game out what role a fully redeemed izzy could possibly continue to play within this story, or what personality traits that he showed in s1 he could even hang onto after a full redemption, and i couldn't come up with anything that felt plausible. not "loyalty to your captain," because his devotion to blackbeard was clearly toxic at the root and would need to be purged entirely before it could be replaced by anything healthier; not yelling at people to stop having so much fun and work harder, because that could work in a different story but would run directly counter to the core themes of ofmd - so what's left? i went looking at popular izzy redemption fic that tried to address that question, and some of it came up with answers that worked in the context of a fic focused mostly on izzy, but it was never anything that could possibly work in a tv show that already had established themes and would continue to focus primarily on other characters. and izzy wouldn't be able to just fade into the background with the other muppets after all the focus on him a believable redemption arc would require. so i knew once he was redeemed he'd be done as a character one way or another.

and s2 i think bore that out, honestly in a much more obvious way than i expected - over the course of izzy's s2 arc he's basically divested of all his s1 personality traits until all that's really left by the end is saying twat all the time, and Guy Who Says Twat is not a role the story's going to particularly need going forward. to keep him around after that you'd need to give him enough new traits that he'd be for all practical purposes a new character anyway.

i do sometimes wonder about a world where izzy's s2 arc saw him be offered a clear chance at redemption and choose to reject it and get worse instead. i kind of missed antagonist izzy by the end, and i wonder if a lot of people who'd originally wanted a redemption for him wouldn't have been happier with that even if they didn't realize it - a descent into full villainy would have kept izzy and his relationships with both ed and stede more central to the plot right up till the end, and in particular the sexual aspect of his feelings for ed could have stayed very directly relevant, where the redemption arc necessitated resolving that very firmly to clear it out of the way as early as possible in s2. i never agreed that ofmd's themes necessarily meant redemption for izzy was inevitable - ted lasso was much more overtly a show about redemption than ofmd right from the start, and even ted lasso let at least one of its antagonists make it all the way to the end as an unrepentant scumbag. if there's anything that meant izzy really had to be redeemed imo it wasn't the overall spirit of the show so much as izzy's role in ed's arc - before anything else izzy's narrative role was always to be a walking symbol of the part of ed that fears vulnerability and holds him back from committing himself to love, and for ed and stede to be happily together by the end of s2, ed had to get to a place where he could see that part of himself as something he no longer needs in his life but also doesn't hate anymore. nothing could have symbolized that like having ed embrace izzy as he dies granting ed permission to just be himself.

Why OFMD 🥹

you know, i could say a lot here about how i think ofmd is genuinely incredibly well-written in some ways that are really unusual on american tv. season 1 in particular is just incredibly tight and elegantly plotted, and s2 is messier but that just makes it all the more interesting to look at the constraints they were under that led to that. my day job's in narrative and i really do professionally admire ofmd a lot, which is one of the reasons i tend to think about creator intent more than some people do when i'm writing meta - death of the author is a super valid perspective but personally i'm really interested in trying to figure out why the writers made the choices they made and what i can learn from that for when i'm in their position.

so all of that's true. but also we all know it's kind of beside the point here, this is a hyperfixation, it's not rational. i can tell you i watched the first nine episodes of our flag means death and liked it a lot but in what i would describe as a basically normal kind of way, and then i watched the tenth and at some point during that episode a rat inside my brain hit the dopamine spigot with a wrench and now it won't turn off so here we are.

aaaand if you've made it to this point, please join us in evil ganging up on fox with love by sending a lovely letter to them over on @ofmdlovelyletters who was also kind enough to make this header <3

[mistriavalley]

Telling Shane about the Junimos

Gender neutral

TW: established relationship, mentions of drug consume (it was just a potion from the wizard), mentions of alcohol

Masterlist

It's no secret that Shane doesn't believe in magic or anything that hasn't been backed by science

You on the other hand are over here fighting all sorts of monsters while helping a bunch of round forest spirits to rebuild the community center and seeking advice from the local wizard. Your hands are full with all the stuff that hasn't been proven by scientists yet

Obviously Shane doesn't think much of the strange items you bring to the community center or the amount of times you ran to the tower in the west with a poisonous mushroom. So what if you need a Bream for the broken down house in the town? It's just your way of fixing things...apparently

The two of you had that talk so many times where you ask him if he's absolutely sure that he doesn't believe at least a little bit in magic

"Nope."

One day you decide to take him to the community center to show him what exactly you're doing there. Of course he won't see the Junimos, but maybe he will be convinced by the item lists they need from you and the boxes where you put said items inside

But to him the letters look like scribbles of either a madman or a toddler that hasn't learned how to write yet and the boxes where you put the items in are...well they must be your doing, right?

He doesn't know how to react to your frantic explanation about some spirits that look like apples. The old Shane would have told you off and walked away, but you're very important to him and the new Shane doesn't wanna hurt your feelings in any way or at least tries to avoid it

"You did all these things for the community center? Wow. You're doing great."

The tone in his voice makes it more than crystal clear that he doesn't believe a word you said. It's frustrating, but he'll see

"Do you trust me, Shane?"

"Uh..."

He looks around the place. He always knew you were a bit quirky, but now he's pretty sure he's apparently dating a second Emily

"I want to open your eyes."

He blinks a few times

"Sure?"

That's all you need to hear to grab his hand and lead him towards cindersap forest

Shane's mind is racing and he has no clue what to expect. The expression on your face is so serious that it's almost scary. What do you plan on doing with him inside the goddamn woods of all places? Will you perhaps sacrifice him? Hah! What a ridiculous thought! And even if. At least it would be happening by the hands of his hot significant other

You lead him up some stairs towards no other place than the tower. It's taller from up close. Shane had looked at it many times from the ranch, but only the tip of the roof is visible from that distance

But is this really happening? Is he seriously going to meet that crazy dude who lives on the border of Pelican Town? Shane doesn't know if he should feel worried or excited. He never particularly cared for that guy or what his business here is so it's difficult to say

Once you two take a step through the wooden front door, Shane is being hit by an earthy smell. This place smells more of the forest than the forest itself. The room wasn't particularly big and it lacked furniture. The big, colorful sigil on the floor is the first thing that catches his attention

Inside the alien looking symbol stands a man with a thick, purple beard and black clothes. The man's eyes light up at the sight of you, but it's immediately being replaced by a frown once his gaze meets Shane's

You pull the stranger aside and started a hushed, but heated discussion with him. Shane feels out of place with his worn out joja sweater and old cargo shorts. Everything here is so mystical and Shane is...well, he is Shane

The sound of a cough rips him out of his thoughts and his legs seem to be moving by themselves as the purple man waves him over to an enormous cauldron. The reassuring smile on your face is the only thing that keeps him sane at the moment

A cup filled with a bubbling, green liquid finds its way into his hands and he just stares at it for a long time, unsure about what to do now

"Drink it."

"Hold up, buddy! You want me to do what exactly?"

Shane has mentally prepared himself to be sacrificed by his partner (for some reason) and not by some old guy who smells like he uses dirt as deodorant

You gently put a hand on his shoulder and plant a kiss on his cheek

"Nothing bad will happen to you. You have my word. I had to drink it too in the beginning."

Okay, so nothing bad will happen, but something definitely will happen to him. Cool. Yea.

"Just pretend it's beer, Shane. Alright. Bottoms up."

The moment the liquid touches his tongue he feels the strong urge to spit it all out onto the floor. It tastes of donkey ass or at least that's what he imagines it to taste like, but it's not that what he should be concerned about

Almost right after thag horrible experience, an explosion of colors hits him and what the fuck? Are those trees flying around him? His knees cave in and he plops down onto the hard floor. By Yoba. Not even Gus' strongest hits like this

Thankfully this odd feeling vanishes as quickly as it came

"Did you fucking drug me?"

"It was a potion."

"That doesn't answer my goddamn question!"

You tell him that it was no drug and that this will help him read the letters and see the spirits. Since he doesn't have a natural connection to nature like you do you had to ask Rasmodius to change the potion a little bit

"I'm so sorry. I should have warned you, but he told me you won't feel any side effects like I did."

"No, don't worry. I'm not mad at you."

But the wizard on the other hand shouldn't show himself around these parts

It doesn't take long for you guys to leave the tower and it feels like as if something is being lifted from Shane's shoulders the more distance he puts between himself and that place

"How do you feel?"

"Fine? I think? I keep expecting to fall over and die though."

"Noooo! That won't happen."

He doesn't want to imagine what the guy put in that so called "potion" of his. Raccoon shit? Poisonous berries? Worms? He shivers at the thought

Once again Shane finds himself inside the old community center with you and once again nothing looks out of the ordinary. Well, except for the dead fish that are piled up in the corner

But then he spots something in the far corner and rubs his eyes. It's gone. Ah, that was probably just a trick of the light

You startle him by holding up one of the letters infront of his face and...wait a minute. Where are the unreadable scribbles? Why can he read the writing now? Shane shakes his head violently. You must have exchanged the letters, but when? You hadn't left his side at all today

He goes through every room, reads every letter and checks every single box. The content of the boxes fit. So you actually do have a system here even though he can't find a sense in it

Then he hears a noise echoing through the hallway to the right

"What was that?"

"A Junimo."

For the first time since forever he finds himself praying to Yoba. He has gone mad. The "wizard" has made him mad with the raccoon shit drink

Shane bolts out of the house and stumbles back home. Back to the ranch. Part of him is trying to drag him towards the saloon to drown the madness in beer, but he can't drink now. He needs to think

After this incident you don't see him for a whole week. Every now and then you do spot him in town, on his way to work, but decide not to approach him. Obviously he's avoiding you right now and you don't want to push things. He had gone through a lot now and probably just needs the space. It still worries you

A week later someone knocks at your front door right as you were about to hop into bed. Shane is standing there, looking more tired and exhausted than ever. You feel the familiar sting of guilt in your chest

"Can we talk?"

Without saying a word, you step aside to let him in. Both of you sit down in the living room infront of the still glowing fireplace. A comfortable heat eminates from it

"You weren't kidding when you said you'd open my eyes."

"I'm sorry."

"No. Don't be. I mean it kinda sucked, yea."

An unbearable silence stretches on. This moment is like torture to you. You have no idea what to expect. Is he angry? Is he sad? Will he break up with you now? You banish these thoughts before your mind can wander any further

"Thanks."

Wait what? That came...unexpected

"But I only thank you. Not that wizard dude in that shitty tower with his raccoon shit potions. I guess...I guess I needed something like this. I needed to know that we're not alone in this world. It's kinda comforting in a way."

You throw your arms around him, relieved that he doesn't hate you. It also feels like a burden has been lifted from you, because now you don't have to keep these things to yourself. Now you have someone to talk to

"I'm free tomorrow. We could go through the lists in the center together maybe and see what we can do."

"Shane..."

"Stop. No. Don't. Don't get all soft on me and shit. This is still super fucking weird."

"Oh."

"Yea! Like why the fuck do these spirits need raw fish? How the fuck do you repair a building with dead fish?"

"OH!"

[relaxxattack]

I humbly request your dave nonbinary thoughts, we may not be ready but I want to know, I want to be enlightened

okay so here’s the thing.

dave strider is a closeted and repressed queer boy in 2009.

in the culture at the time (especially on the internet where he basically grew up) "gay" is used as a catch-all for basically all things evil, stupid, and wrong. as kids grow up they learn that— because patriarchal privilege is something you can lose the second you’re not performing your masculinity to an insane degree— being gay makes you not a real man. being gay means you’re an effeminate little freak, a subversion, a pervert. something to be scorned and taught a lesson. which is terrifying to these kids.

on top of all this, dave is being abused daily in the name of becoming a hero (a real man). his ultimate example of heroism is a hypermasculine freak who physically, mentally, and sexually abuses him. of course dave doesn’t want to do introspection into the idea of liking men. being a man is a burdenous ideal, and the sexuality of men is something that has been consistently used to harm him.

that’s where we come to the meteor trip. after three years of humanity being dead, dave obviously goes through a lot of introspection about stuff he’d previously been repressing. dave seems to be of the opinion that because earth is gone, a lot of those restrictive social conventions should be gone as well— especially things like toxic masculinity and gayness as a complete “other” that you have to “turn” to; he claims (correctly) that a lot of these restrictive social ideas are imaginary lines built by prejudice.

so, dave does not subscribe to the idea of hard labels.

it’s important for him to reclaim the idea of gayness, of course. dave has been agonizing over that for the entirety of the comic. his own sexuality is something that terrifies him, to the point where he cannot even manage to date women he actually likes. even if he really is truthfully interested in women, he cannot really handle that until he’s finally come to terms with himself as “gay”. (which is why i don’t think dave would use the term bisexual. even if he does know what that means, that’s not the word he’s been terrified of embracing for the past 16 years. dave strider is gay. his entire arc revolves around accepting this.)

but i think if dave was thinking about gender as much as he was contemplating sexuality on that trip, he would come to a similar conclusion about labels. and besides, masculinity isn’t exactly something that he’s had a positive relationship with.

this is why i think he’d be some form of nonbinary or agender. dave calls himself gay because of his hard-earned reclamation of that word, not specifically because he is never interested in women. i think if he were to call himself a guy, it would be along those same lines.

(i could also go on a tangent about dave’s existence as a hussie self insert and his arc and dialogue with these concepts as a reflection of someone who eventually came out as agender, but this post is long enough as it is)

basically, gay nonbinary dave strider. he’s real.

[squinch-depraved]

first charlie post,, i hope you enjoy i've never written for him before but this was in my brain so here you go

the music spilled out of the speakers and reverberated in your skull, helping to usher in a developing headache. you searched around desperately for a friend who could help you get home and smiled softly when your eyes settled on charlie. he was standing across the room, leaning against a wall as he observed the goings-on of the party. you remembered him mentioning earlier that he didn't plan on drinking that night, so you inched your way through the crowded space and tried not to blush when his face lit up at the sight of you.

"can you help me get home?" you slurred slightly. you had to repeat yourself twice, each time him leaning his ear closer to your lips until he could understand you over the incessant din of the gathering. once he understood you, though, he put his hand on your shoulder and leaned in to speak to you this time.

"of course! let me tell some people bye and then we'll go," he replied, almost yelling in an attempt to be heard. you nodded and followed him as he waved bye to some mutual friends, and before long, you two were stepping out the front door and joking together as you hopped in his car.

"god, it was so loud in there," you mumbled, sinking down into his passenger seat.

"it was a party," he joked. "i think that's kind of a given for any large social gathering."

"it wasn't that loud all night, was it? i coulda sworn it wasn't that bad earlier this evening," you asked him, glancing at him as he drove. he'd only been to your place twice, but apparently it was important enough for him to remember how to get there.

he laughed quietly and nodded. "the volume was pretty consistent tonight, i would say."

you nodded pensively and rested your forehead on the window next to you, staring out at the city lights whizzing by in the dark. "was really hoping to get laid tonight," you complained quietly. you didn't think he heard you, but charlie gripped the steering wheel tightly and tried to come up with anything else to say besides what first popped into his head. it was quiet for a moment before he let his impulsive thoughts win.

"i wouldn't mind helping you with that," he said lowly. you almost didn't hear him, and in the long, drawn out seconds before your response, he took in a shallow breath and mentally cursed himself.

"really?' you asked meekly, turning your head to stare at his profile. he kept his eyes trained on the road.

"yeah, i mean, if...if that's something you wanted." he gulped quietly and made a turn.

you thought for a moment and nodded before remembering he might not be able to see you in the dark. "i think i would enjoy that," you admitted, a smile audible in your tone. you could just barely make it out, but he grinned and nodded ever so slightly.

your face flushed at the realization that he had been wanting to fuck you for a while, but had just never reached out to ask. it made sense, he always behaved differently around you than other people, but somehow you had never put two and two together. you wished you had noticed sooner; you were sat there next to him for what felt like minutes grieving all the time you could have spent riding him until he spoke and pulled you out of your fantasies.

"it's this street, right?"

you shook off the thoughts and nodded again. "yeah, turn here, then make the first left, and three places down is me."

"awesome," he stated, carefully following your instructions and parking on the street in front of your home. you turned to look at each other for a moment before giggling awkwardly and tucking your hair behind your ear.

"you wanna come in?" you asked, nodding your head back towards your home and biting your lip.

charlie took in a shaky breath and smiled, eyes flicking down to your lips. "i really do," he replied. you cupped his face in your hand for a second, running your thumb over his cheek before retreating and stepping out of the car. he followed, locking it behind him as he walked behind you up to your porch.

you let the both of you in, pulling him close for a deep kiss before you walked inside. stunned, he trailed behind you, mesmerized by the taste of your sweet mouth.

"fuck," you hissed when you flicked the light switch, immediately turning them back off and instead switching on some lamps strewn across the main area. "you want some tea? 'm gonna make myself some," you yawned. "sober up a bit."

charlie nodded and followed you once again to the kitchen, picking out a tea bag from your stash and sitting down on your couch like you told him to while you changed clothes and made your drinks. after what felt like an eternity of him wondering what was going to happen when you got back, you appeared out of seemingly nowhere, extending a mug towards him while you sipped on your own.

you plopped down next to him and put on a movie, something neither of you would pay attention to but good enough to have on in the background. half an hour passed, the two of you joking with each other and sipping your beverages, and soon your headache was gone.

you weren't sure how you ended up underneath him, kissing him fervently and moaning every time he ground his hips down against you. your legs were wrapped around his waist as he kissed and bit your neck, and you squealed when he lowered himself to be between your thighs. planting a wet kiss to the inside of each, he pulled down the shorts you had changed into and gently took your underwear in his teeth, looking up at you innocently as he maneuvered them off you.

bare cunt exposed to him, you moaned in anticipation. charlie grinned and placed a sloppy kiss on your clit, savoring the noises that fell from your lips as you squirmed underneath him. he began eating you more eagerly, spurred on by your pornographic noises.

you ground your hips down onto his face, feeling the ridge of his nose press into your sensitive nub as his tongue worked on your sopping hole.

"fuck, charlie!" you gasped, legs wrapping around his head. he moaned into your pussy at the feeling of being smothered between your thighs. "oh my god!" you cried out.

rocking back and forth on his face, tangling your fingers in his hair, you approached your high quickly. his eyes were closed, blissed out from how good you tasted and the thought of how good he was able to make you feel. he flicked them open to watch your face as you came, though.

eyes screwing shut, head falling back, you wailed loudly as your orgasm barreled through you. you kept repeating his name until he finally pulled away to kiss you. the taste of yourself on his lips made you crave more.

"can i fuck you now?" he panted, hovering over you. you nodded vigorously and grabbed at his pant loops. he grinned, ego boosted, and began unbuttoning them, quickly sliding them off and tossing them onto the floor. his boxers followed soon after and you tried not to stare at the many inches between his legs while he positioned himself back between your legs.

"you ready?" he asked breathily.

"please, charlie," you begged him. his smile grew slightly and he pushed himself into you, the both of you letting out airy moans while you got used to the feeling of each other. after a moment, he began thrusting, rolling his hips at a reasonable starting speed.

the more noises you made, the more he sped up, pumping himself deeper and deeper into you until you were a mess under him, unable to form words any longer.

charlie just kept singing your praises, calling you beautiful, kissing you gently, making sure you knew how appreciative he was and how badly he had needed this, needed you, for such a long time. you just sat there, babbling incoherently, the occasional phrase able to be deciphered, usually, "so good," or, "fuck, i love your cock."

once he began to get close, he started getting sloppier, letting more of his weight rest on you and biting down on your skin harder. "where do you want me to finish?" he panted, breath hot against your neck.

"mm- tits!" you pawed at him until he got off your chest, still pumping into you as he watched you peel your t-shirt off over your head, leaving you completely naked. the sight of your breasts bouncing in time with his thrusts was enough to send him over the edge, and he groaned erotically as he thrust a few final times before pulling out and pumping himself in his hand over your chest, leaving his hot white seed to spurt out and land all over you.

you dipped your finger in his cum and brought it to your mouth, tasting it greedily while he groaned once more at the sight, filing it away to remember next time he was by himself. he stepped off the couch and walked to the kitchen, coming back with something to clean you off with.

you let him take care of you and convinced him to follow you to your bed, clinging onto him all night.

he didn't sleep at his own place again for a week.

[diminuel]

God… Wani transitions, looks so much more like a man than when they first met, and Dragon — so used to being reprimanded and poorly treated by men stronger than him, and used to being cordial and friendly with men he knows are *as* strong as him — but Wani is 10 years his junior. Still a rookie. And the marines teach you to *respect* and *submit* to men stronger than you. Which obviously the RA objects to. But Dragon is *head* of the RA so *everyone* is subservient to him — except his personal friends, whom are all basically equally as strong as he is if not stronger.

/except for Wani/

And whatever level of misogyny Dragon picked up pre-RA from the marines its pretty clear the flavor wouldn’t have been “ugh this woman thinks shes as strong as ME a MAN? Lets teach her a lesson boys!” as much as “pretty lady! pretty lady! impress the pretty lady!!!! make her like you make her job easy as possible so MORE pretty ladies want to work with you!!!!” So whatever Dragon believed about their difference in strength, experience, intelligence, etc. wasn’t assss relevant to him pre-transition. Thats his girlfriend why would he want to compete with or see bis girlfriend as a threat? They love and support eachother forever and ever.

But now he’s a man and he’s less experienced and cocky and all the things Dragon had beaten into him are signs of immense disrespect from one man to another man *clearly* stronger and smarter and more experienced and higher ranking and—

….and now Dragon’s bed is very, very empty. Which is weird because he doesn’t want to get out of it either.

Wani eventually comes back and Dragon has never felt lighter. Nothing really matters except Wani. He’s decided he’d abandon the RA if Wani asked. He really would. He knows his lover has dreams (dreams he’s apparently stomped all over). The RA isn’t a dream, it’s a necessity. But that means he can leave. He belongs to Wani first.

He’s pregnant. Theyre going to be fathers. Wani has NEVER seen Dragon cry like this. He missed him so much and now theyre going to be a family. Its barely past noon and Dragon has a resignation speech ready to go. He just wants to spend the rest of his life with Wani. Clearly his RA duties and his past are getting in the way so he needs to give being supportive his full attention round the clock.

Wani nearly clocks him over the head. Is he INSANE?! He doesn’t own ANYONE. Nobody belongs to ANYONE. Wasn’t that the whole point of his OWN RA? What sort of man throws his ideals away to impress a lover?

Stay in the RA. Wani isn’t giving up on their utopia either. (Maybe he hasn’t given up being king of the pirates yet either.) if theyre raising this child theyre doing it as equals Dragon. Wani thought thats what they were when he fell in love. He was surprised when becoming a man would somehow make that harder (aren’t they even *more* similar now?)

He’s right. Dragon’s respect for his lover should have never been made conditional or brought into question. He never truly forgives himself for fucking this up. Maybe Dragon has given Croc too much leeway with some boundaries, but that should have never been made into an issue of gender. A discomfort Dragon is only able to tolerate for a girlfriend but not a boyfriend. All or nothing. 50-50.

Of course. Reprimanding a superior in thr marines like this would get you on cleaning duty for a month. But he doesn’t feel disrespected. Or threatened. He’s *proud* his Wani is so strong and confident to talk down a man twice his size. Maybe Dragon is bigger and more experienced. But Crocodile is twice as brave and twice as determined and twice as confident and that’s *important* and it *matters* and it makes them both better people together. He’s good for him. Theyre good together. Theyre going to have a great kid and he couldn’t be more excited.

(And besides. Wani is only going to get bigger and stronger.)

Ah, I love it ;w;

Dragon going from one extreme into the other, letting his actions be guided by what he feels is expected of him in a given situation instead of letting himself be guided by his convictions. But luckily, Crocodile's there to knock some sense into him~

And Dragon's right, Crocodile will grow, he will get stronger. ♥

(Though the angsty part in me whispers what about when Crocodile does lose faith in himself? What about when his dream shatters because he was too cocky, too confident and nearly gets killed in a confrontation with Whitebeard? Unless that happened before or doesn't happen at all.)

[in1-nutshell]

Hi, can you please write a sequel to Susan's story. I thought and it occurred to me that it should go on like this: After the day described before, a week passes and little interesting happens during all this time. Unless, of course, you count the day when Susan assembled a detector from all sorts of junk that, in her opinion, should capture energy anomalies. To the annoyance of Autobots and children, these anomalies are Autobot life signals. All day long, Susan walked around the city tracking the Autobots, who barely managed to escape from the annoying schoolgirl. But it all ended when the Raf used equipment at the base to send a strong energy pulse that caused the detector to explode right in Susan's face. But after this excess, everything went back to normal. As the new week begins on Monday, Susan arrives at school handing out invitations to all her classmates to come to her house to watch the meteor shower in her backyard. For her, this is such a rare and significant event that she put on her special astronomer hat. And as you might guess, all of her classmates either lied that they were busy, or pretended to be interested but weren't really going to come, or outright refused or laughed in her face. The only ones who really want to come are Jack and the Raf (Despite Miko's warnings that this party is just a sophisticated trap) They thought it would be possible to go to this party at least out of pity (Jack especially saw this as an opportunity to apologize to Susan for the broken camera) But despite their wishes, they could not come because they had been helping the Autobots with a very important mission all evening. Which brings us to the backyard of the Farmfield house, lined with folding chairs and decorated with homemade decorations. Where Susan is sitting and waiting for someone to come. She waits and waits, but nothing. After a while, the sliding door opens with a sharp movement and Susan's mother comes out of the house. (A little clarification: After Susan's grandfather died, her parents moved back to house in Jasper to "take care" of their daughter. Although in fact they only moved because their business went bankrupt and they need a place to live) A woman looks around the backyard, looking at the decorations with disdain.

Mom: What is this all about, Susan? The woman asked with irritation in her voice.

Susan: Oh, it's all for my little party. One of the rarest meteor showers is going to happen today, and I thought it would be fun to share this rare phenomenon with someone. And I think if you and Dad join in, that would be it…

The girl happily tried to explain her idea until her mother unceremoniously interrupted her.

Mom: Susan, not me, not your father, and no one else in the whole world is interested in some stupid space-flying rocks.

The woman said with growing irritation in her voice.

Susan:Well, some of my classmates agreed to come, so they're interested.

The girl said with hope in her voice.

Mom: Ha, where are they?

She asked with mockery in her voice

Susan: Maybe… Maybe they're just late.

Susan: Maybe… Maybe they're just late.

She said clinging to the last shred of hope

Mom: Or maybe they just lied to you and you, being an empty-headed fool, took their word for it?

Saying this, every word is laced with poison

SUSAN: But… But they promised

Susan said sniffling, tears in her eyes

Mom: Oh my God, are you crying!? Stop it!

The woman shouted .

Susan: I'm sorry, Mom.

Susan muttered, trying to wipe away her tears

Mom: You know, it's because of your excessive sensitivity and your stupid hobbies that you can't make friends. You're just like your grandfather, a weirdo who will be laughed at for the rest of your miserable life.

Susan: I'm sorry

Susan mumbled even more softly than last time, still crying no matter how hard she tried to stop.

Mom: You know what, I don't care, live your miserable life any way you want.

The woman muttered at the end, turning around and walking back into the house. On the way there, she knocked over a couple of chairs and tore a couple of ornaments from the trees.

Mom:And take away all this garbage!

She shouted as she entered the house and slammed the door behind her.

Leaving Susan to sit alone, feeling like she's the loneliest person in the universe.

I'm sorry if this is too much, I just got carried away.

And I'm sorry if I've already sent this request, my Internet is buggy.

I teared up a bit reading this.

Poor Susan!

Susan will be okay, I promise!

Hope you enjoy!

Jack, Miko, and Raf vs Susan Farmfield part 2

SFW, Platonic, Angst, Human reader

TFP

Susan was still the trio enemy.

…Well, more Miko’s than Jack and Raf.

Jack didn’t see much harm with Susan.

She couldn’t even hurt a fly.

The only thing he would count as Susan hurting someone is having them sit in a room with her for 24 hours talking about conspiracy theories.

Raf honestly felt sorry for her.

He had her as a science partner once and it was fun!

He even got a couple of cool stickers from her.

Raf just hated that she had to look into places that could expose the bots.

Miko straight up hated her.

She saw the other girl as her prime nemesis, like the Autobots saw the Decepticons as their nemesis.

She was DETERMINED to make sure that Susan never got a hold of anything related to the bots or anything on them.

At school… Jack, Miko, and Raf are walking through the hallway. They spot Susan getting her books from her locker. A couple of new band aids cover parts of her face. Raf: “Susan? You, okay?” Susan jumps a bit, but smiles seeing it was the trio. Susan: “Oh yeah! I’m fine!” Jack: “What about those band aids from?” Susan: “Well, I was testing out a new invention I made last weekend. It can detect strange or unusual energy pulses. I hit a really big one the other night and it kinda exploded on my face.” Miko: “Well it was put out of its misery then.” Jack: “Miko.” He nudges her ribs a bit. The comment flies over her head. Susan: “But it did teach me to widen the range, but still back to square one. See you guys later!” Susan walks off. Jack and Raf turn to a smug Miko. Jack: “Is that why you told Raf to fire the energy pulse?” Miko: “Maybe, maybe not.” Raf: “Miko! That could have hurt her!” Miko: “So what? She’s the enemy.”

It was later that week when the trio found Susan passing something around the class.

It was an invitation to see a meteor shower from her backyard.

Jack and Raf winced as they saw students laugh and taunt in Susan’s face for making the ‘dumb party’ in the first place.

Other just made excuse not to go.

If there was one thing the trio, yes including Miko, could respect was that Susan was as stubborn as they came and followed through plans till the end.

Even if they blew up in her face.

Raf was the first person to tell Susan that he wanted to go.

The young boy had never seen Susan speechless and so happy at the same time.

Jack followed as well, mainly because he felt he owed Susan a solid after Arcee crushed her polaroid camera a couple weeks ago.

Miko reluctantly agreed, keep your friends close and your enemies closer right?

When the trio told the bots this, there were mixed reactions.

Arcee was curious on why the girl wanted to invite others to her home to watch some meteors.

It wasn’t a big deal.

Bumblebee was worried that it could be a trap, or Susan was going to do something to them.

Bulkhead did not want them going to Susan’s house. Point blank.

Optimus and Ratchet had mixed feelings about this human, but they both agreed to keep on optic out for her.

It was the night of the meteor shower when a couple of Decepticons showed up in a sector near an energon vein.

It was all servos and hands on deck.

The bots would go in the retrieve the energon while the kids would help keep visual and have the groundbrigde ready.

All three of them completely forgetting that they had plans that night.

Susan waiting patiently with a tray of homemade cupcakes and snacks in a lawn chair. Maybe everyone was running late. Or they forgot last minute, and they were getting ready. Her mother comes outside. Mother: “And what is all of… this?” Susan: “It’s for the Meteor shower party. You know, the one I told you about… like 9 times.” Mother: “Don’t you get smart with me missy!” She sneers at the décor and snacks. Mother: “And why on Earth would you waste all this food and paper for a party for yourself?” Susan: “No, I gave out invitations. They’ll be coming.” Mother: “Susan, if there’s one thing, I do know about you is that you have no friends. Just like your disgrace of a grandfather.” Susan narrowing her eyebrows. Mother: “Don’t give me that look! He had no friends because he drove them all away with his stories and lies!” Susan: “They were tru—” Mother: “SHUT IT!” Susan clamps her mouth and feels a familiar sting in her eyes. Mother: “Quite your crying kid! You don’t cry! Just quite it!” Susan: “What? Quite what?” Mother: “EVERYTHING! You think your going to get anywhere in this world by holding onto that weird little hobby of yours? Do you really think anyone will like you if they hear you spouting this nonsense? Look at yourself Stacy!” Susan: “Its Susan.” Mother: “Whatever! Just clean all of this junk up by tomorrow morning or I swear you will never see your telescope again!” SLAM! The lights in the house turned off. Susan slowly knelt to the ground letting out soft sobs while holding herself tightly. Maybe they were late… Maybe they got stuck in traffic… Maybe they… They… Following school day… The trio is walking down the hall. Raf: “I still feel bad that we didn’t go.” Jack: “I’m sure she’ll understand. We just had things to do.” Miko: “More important things than a meteor shower.” The stop when they see Susan again. She looks… different… Susan spots the trio and freezes a bit before slowly walking past them. Miko raises an eyebrow. Miko: “That was weird.” Raf: “She’s upset Miko.” Miko: “Please, Susan Farmfield never gets upset.” Jack looking at Susan going into the classroom with a defeated look on her face. Jack: “You sure about that?” Miko: “She’s just doing one of those sympathy tricks. Trust me the enemy will go back to normal when she sees her plan isn’t working.”

Since the party, Susan started having second thought about everything she had worked for.

Don’t get her wrong she still believed that there were aliens and unknown things that needed to be discovered.

But… what if part of what her mother was saying was right?

No, she came to far to start second guessing herself now.

Who needs friends anyway?

Susan Farmfield was going to find those aliens.

For her Grampa!

Susan was walking near one of the forested areas with her new energy detector. BING! BING! The machine had detected something. Something at the bottom of the gorge. Carefully Susan climbs to the bottom and gasps. It was a pod of some sort… Definitely alien origin. Susan pats the frost glass. Susan: “Hello?” The glass open startling the girl and she falls backwards and stares at the giant coming out of the pod. Groaning, a large bot sits up, stretches a bit before looking around and spots Susan. Susan waves awkwardly. The bot slowly waves back. Susan: “I don’t mean any harm. My name is Susan. Do you have a name?” The bot grumbles a bit. Susan: “What? Iroh eef?” The bot clears his vents a bit before giving a small smile. Ironhide: “The names Ironhide, kid.”

[owlsie-hoot]

All Creatures Great and small "Holding the baby" 05x02

I don't even know where to start!

First: my internet connection was not AWOL this week and I could watch the entire episode without any trouble. And maybe that is why I still cannot sort my thoughts!

What was this episode? What happened? How many of the predictions came true? How many spoiler dots were correctly connected? A LOT!

Starting at the beginning:

Audrey being on one of her first training sessions to learn everything about her new job, a scene I was eagerly looking forward since the end of February. That the episode started with that was simply amazing. I cried because it made me so happy. Of course it was Siegfried who didn't close the curtains correctly - prediction one. And of course he waited for her because he wanted to make "you were accounted for" - correct prediction two. I mean how many times have we written about this scenario in fanfics? I certainly have used this trope numerous times. Needless to say that this entire sequence already killed me and that was only the beginning. The joking, the banter, the care, the offering of a nightcap, handing her the letter from Tristan. There is no line there anymore. It has vanished.

Only in my rewatch did I notice that episode 2 picks up directly after episode 1. Just one hour later. So we all got to yell "Bingo" if we assumed that Siegfried was only still up, talking to James, because he was waiting for Audrey in episode 1. (sorry was too excited last night to notice this)

Siegfried and Jimmy at the breakfast table: can it get any cuter? Seriously! Reading medical textbooks to the baby is so Siegfried.

The story slowly unfolds after that of course and I didn't dare hope that Siegfried and Audrey would get more than two scenes for themselves. Setting my expectations very low for each episode is hard but rewarding because they were inseparable in that episode. Siegfried storming through the house, yelling her name, ranting about Bosworth, telling her everything he hates about that guy, is so married! Of course Bosworth hears everything and of course Siegfried puts his foot in. "Monopolising my housekeeper" - is one way of phrasing it but I think that 'housekeeper' is by now a very hollow expression, only used out of habit. And because every other term would give him away. He cannot say her first name, he cannot say partner, wife, companion, friend. I wasn't sure if the look Audrey shot him was because he called her 'housekeeper' or because he interfered her meeting and offended Bosworth.

Cue Siegfried apologising (scene number 3 for them!) almost immediately afterwards in his own special way. He fully accepts her terms and conditions and points out that he was only angry with Bosworth and not with Audrey who only had two training sessions so far. "feels like more" he mutters because he misses her and doesn't like sharing her. But he does not really understand that he is jealous. At least they talk now! Still not enough but there is so much more communication between them that is emotionally important and not your regular small talk.

As if this wasn't already enough, the next correctly predicted scene happens. Audrey riding her bike while on a round, finding poor Bingo and calling Siegfried for help. Once again the two share a frame but this time even more flirting is added. The looks are killing me and I can't believe what I just witnessed. There was admiration and pride, thankfulness and a tenderness in that scene that leaves no doubt that Audrey is slowly getting there.

The next scene with them doesn't help either because the first hint is dropped that Siegfried is too old for romance (and doesn't have a family) - which Audrey finds so funny that she has a hard time suppressing her laughter. Bosworth could not be more wrong. Seeing Audrey and Siegfried sitting opposite the warden, like the couple they unofficially are, in a house that reminds us of Gerald's dark bachelor flat, is the cherry on top of the cake. Followed by the epic car ride (prediction number 4!) that I rewatched directly afterwards.

Audrey teasing him and Siegfried knowing that she does but playing along. They are on fire. Additionally we have never seen Audrey so carefree, so at ease and happy, smiling and teasing throughout an episode. Gone is the weight that she had carried around for such a long time. She truly is free and Siegfried welcomes this with open arms. "There should be a line between employer and employee" "when is suits" - that line Siegfried pointed out in 01.02 has eroded. She can endlessly tease him and he joins in. Seize the day! And smile about it.

Only to step hard on the breaks later. Have we ever heard Audrey tease him like that? Or Siegfried answer in such a flirty sarcastic way? I don't think so. Will add "Stubborn beast" to the list of endearments Audrey uses for Siegfried.

And finally, the last scene. Not alone this time but the predicted, apron wearing husband. Adapting, helping, not being grumpy about it. And his wife who lets him fight his own battles because she enjoys the squabble between Bosworth and Siegfried way too much (when it is not about her).