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benedictscanvas · 4 years ago

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all the wrong places [3/7] - spencer reid x reader

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: It only takes a moment for Spencer to realise that he doesn’t just want to marry you someday, he wants to marry you as soon as he possibly can. But since he can’t come up with a solid plan, he turns to his BAU family for help in planning the most important day of his life so far. Is that a mistake? Most definitely.

Warnings: Series probably aren’t meant to be exclusively fluffy, but this one practically is! I need some fluff in my life, damn it! There may be some mention of regular Criminal Minds things, some language but mostly just good ol’ Spence lovin’

a chapter every day for seven days! (20-26th July 2020) so please drop an ask if you’d like to be tagged <3

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Chapter Three - Flash Failure

Third time’s a charm?

No, turns out third time’s a fucking nightmare.

Penelope? A complete liability. Whilst Spencer knew she was an amazing friend and he couldn’t imagine any of the team’s lives without her, he also now knew that allowing her to help him with the proposal plans was not his finest moment. Allowing her was too strong a word: he had simply not stopped her.

“You booked what?”

“A flash mob! And they’re coming over to the downstairs gym later today to practice with you, make sure you know your section of the dance.”

His section? Of the dance?

“I’m not sure about this, babygirl,” Derek’s voice was wary, and if Derek was worried about it, then it must really have been one of Penelope’s outlandish ideas. But she had been so excited about Spencer proposing ever since she’d found out against his will, and when she begged to at least help with the proposal somehow, it wasn’t as if Spencer had the heart to say no.

“And why would that be, my most delicious chocolate thunder? You don’t trust me now, huh?”

“You know I trust you in every way imaginable,” he said with a wink, because they could flirt even when Spencer was clearly breaking down in the corner of the batcave, “But Spencer has messed up two perfectly easy proposals now. You think he’ll nail this one?”

“I haven’t messed them up!” Spencer said defensively, his voice just a little too high pitched, “Okay, I messed one of them up, but the other one was a terrible idea provided by JJ.”

He half expected JJ to turn the corner right at that moment to scold him, but instead there was a very familiar knocking pattern at the door that caused Spencer’s heart to drop. He pushed Garcia’s shoulder until she closed all the proposal (and wedding) tabs on the computer. On all the computers.

“Can I join the top secret batcave meeting?” your voice rang out as just your head poked round the side of the door, and Spencer’s heart melted at the fact that you really weren’t going to come in unless you were told you could.

“Hi sweetheart,” he said encouragingly, as Derek and Penelope both flashed you a signature very-not-guilty, nothing-at-all-is-going-on-here, smiles. You didn’t seem to pay them any attention, smiling widely at Spencer with abandon as you entered the room.

“Hi,” you said brightly, and Derek and Penelope would be annoyed that you’d practically ignored their presence if they weren’t kind of used to it. When you and Spencer were in a room together, 90% of the time there was no one that could tear you away from each other. The other 10% was all on cases, where your attention was elsewhere, but there would still be times that the two of you bouncing theories around would completely miss something else that had been said.

“What brings you to my lair, my dear?” Penelope asked you from her chair, which she was lightly spinning around in. You managed to turn your attention to her, and bit your lip sheepishly.

“Actually, I’ve been looking for Spence here. Wondered if he might like to join me for a very romantic lunch?”

“You’ve got a consult you want my opinion on?” he asked instantly and you groaned, pouting.

“Why couldn’t I just want to spend lunchtime with my very special boyfriend?” you say wistfully, but when he gave you that look, you huffed and relented, “Fine, I’ve got a consult I could use your expert advice on. But, I did buy you takeout to sweeten the deal?”

He shook his head, his previous proposal anxieties almost forgotten as he walked up to you, throwing an arm around your shoulder.

“You’re enough to sweeten any deal, sugar,” he said in his best Derek voice, the man himself scoffing behind him as Penelope laughed hysterically. You were giggling too under his arm, bringing a hand up to cover your mouth as Spencer led you out of the room, “Let’s go. See you later, guys.”

“Yes. 4pm in the gym for our session remember, Reid?”

“I’m not coming!” he shouted back at the two of them, already having left.

Penelope looked up at Derek as he sat on the desk above her.

“He’s definitely coming.”

“Oh yeah. He wouldn’t risk making you angry, babygirl.”

---

Actually, Spencer absolutely would risk making Garcia angry, if the other option was participating in a flash mob style dance to ‘Marry You’ by Bruno Mars before getting down on one knee in front of your chair and proposing as if what he’d just done wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

He returned to the batcave after assisting you on your consult, providing important information about a few chemical concoctions that had come into play on the case, and told Garcia on no uncertain terms that she was to cancel whatever she had planned and that he’d be doing this on his own. She reacted relatively well, even if she was a little bummed. When he promised to tell her whatever he decided to do ahead of time, she perked up a little.

So when she scurried up to his desk at the end of the day, heels clacking loudly on the floor, he never expected there to be a problem.

“We have a problem,” she said under her breath, glancing over at Hotch’s office in which you were currently sat, going over your recent performance in a routine appraisal. You’d be out in five minutes, at most. The glance she spared towards you worried Spencer more than anything.

“What kind of problem?”

“A huge one. One that I cannot explain, nor can I fix unless you and your genius brain can come up with something incredible because as it is, I’m freaking out right now.”

“Okay, Garcia, you’re going to have to try to explain it.”

“Well, maybe I can explain it,” she admitted, bobbing quietly in her place beside his desk, “But I’m not sure I want to.”

Her voice was small. Timid. She was never like this. Derek clearly noticed it too, as did Emily, since both of them came over quickly.

“Everything alright, babygirl?” Derek asked, a comforting hand on her shoulder and she reached up to put her hand over his, nuzzling into it a little. Spencer was getting more agitated by the second.

“No,” she said warily, then suddenly she ripped Derek’s hand away from her, “And I don’t deserve your comfort!”

Emily and Derek both looked dumbfounded, but Spencer stood up and took her by the elbows.

“Tell me what it is,” he said softly, but with a firm tone that she couldn’t argue against, “Whatever it is, we’ll fix it.”

She took a deep breath.

“Iforgottocanceltheflashmobandthey’reoutsiderightnow.”

“What?” it was all three of the others who said it. She sighed.

“I forgot to cancel the flash mob-” she said slowly, “-because Derek sent me a text right after you left my cave earlier. So they’re outside right now, with a huge picture of Y/N, waiting for her to exit the building which will trigger the...dancing.”

A pause.

“This better be a joke.”

“Oh god, just look out the window,” Garcia said sadly, resigned to her fate of the resident genius being immeasurably annoyed with her for the foreseeable future.

All four of them rushed over to the windows, even though Emily was only just starting to get an idea of what was happening. Sure enough, there was the mob. It truly was a mob too, at least fifty of them, with a huge picture of you on posterboard in the middle, all in colourful clothing. And there was a speaker. A large speaker.

“Fuck,” Spencer said, all matter of fact, no attempt to hide his language or keep it down.

“Yeah,” Derek breathed, eyes still on the ground, “How did you forget to cancel, Penelope?”

She whined, probably at him using her first name.

“You’re the one who sent me that particularly sexy text! What was I supposed to do? Not reply straight away?”

“Yes, Garcia,” Spencer said, sitting back down at his desk and putting his head in his hands, “That’s exactly what you were supposed to do. You were supposed to cancel that group of dancing idiots so I wouldn’t make a complete fool of myself in front of the woman I want to marry and then - then you could reply to Derek’s text.”

His voice was defeated. He couldn’t believe it. How the hell was he supposed to get out of this? There were other exits out of the building, most of them emergency exits, but they were still in the way of the car park. There was no way of getting out of this building without you seeing the mob outside, without seeing the gigantic picture of you on the sidewalk.

“This will not be the most helpful comment,” Emily piped up suddenly, coming over and crouching in front of Spencer’s hunched over frame, “But I have to say - I’m so happy for you and Y/N, Reid. You should have told me you were going to propose!”

“Oh yes, so you could offer the same kind of stellar advice I’ve received so far.”

“Well, I wouldn’t have suggested a mob,” she mumbled, earning her a sharp glance from Derek. Penelope was already feeling bad enough.

“Right, come on,” Derek said, more enthusiastically, “We have to make a plan. Y/L/N will be out of her meeting in no time, and asking you if you want to head home. What are you going to do?”

“Me?”

“Okay, okay - what are we going to do?”

“Yeah, we can help,” Emily said encouragingly, “We’re all in this together Reid. Maybe you should just take the opportunity and propose?”

“I am not proposing to Y/N in a flash mob!” he said, suddenly animated as he looked up, “You know how much she hates too much fuss. She’d hate it, and then, as a byproduct of that, she would hate me too and-”

“Y/N could never hate you, Spencer,” Emily said kindly, interrupting his worried rambles, “But if this isn’t the way you pictured it, that’s fine. We just have to get Y/N to your car, that’s it. So how can we do it?”

“Couldn’t Penelope just go downstairs and tell them to go away first?” Derek asked and Garcia shook her head, woefully.

“They don’t let people put them off once they’re ‘on location’,” she said, “Otherwise people against the engagement can call it off.”

“Oh, well that’s a sensible policy!” Spencer announced sarcastically, throwing his hands in the air.

“Woah there, Spence, everything alright over here?”

The one time that your voice wasn’t able to calm him down. Instead, all four of them turned to face you with thinly veiled panic, until Emily was able to speak up with an explanation.

“I went to a deli for lunch, dropped my sandwich,” she said quickly, shaking her head at her own supposed clumsiness, “But apparently they have a policy of no replacements.”

She looked to Spencer, urging him to back her up.

“Yeah, what kind of policy is that? Just makes me so mad-” he was laying it on way too thick, because you were starting to look concerned, “-because you should have got another sandwich, Emily! Ridiculous.”

He threw his arms up in the air again to drive the point home. Derek was physically wincing. This was the worst. The absolute worst.

“I think maybe someone needs some sleep,” you chuckled, reaching for Spencer’s hand and taking it in your own, rubbing your thumb against the back of his hand until you felt some of the tension leave his muscles, “You ready to go?”

He hesitated, just staring at you with wide eyes.

“That tired, huh? No more sad stories about sandwiches, Em, if this is what it does to him,” you laughed, but you were stepping up your soothing gestures by the second, comfort radiating from you as you let Spencer lean into you and rested a hand on his back, rubbing gentle circles. He could see the worry you held for him in your eyes, “We’ll see you guys tomorrow. Come on, you.”

You tugged him along beside you as you began to walk towards the door, picking up his satchel on your way and delicately looping it over his head until it was in his rightful place. Spencer was following, but he turned his head back to the others, flashing them a help me look that was as terrified as it was desperate.

“Wait for us!” Penelope called out, tottering after the two of you in her heels, grabbing Derek and Emily by the wrists to take them with her, “We’ll all walk out together, like a family.”

“Okay,” you chuckled, shaking your head fondly, “But be quick! I think this one’s falling asleep on me.”

Penelope nodded and hurriedly shooed the others to go get their stuff, or at least whatever they could grab quickly.

“I’ll just grab some of my stuff too then, Spence,�� you said gently, taking your arm from his back as if you were worried he might fall over without the support, “You okay?”

“Tired,” he said bluntly, because now he had no idea what was going on and he couldn’t keep up. His brain was firing in every direction.

“I know, baby,” you pouted, kissing him on the cheek before you sauntered off, turning as you walked, “I’ll be two seconds.”

He counted. One, two. You were a good few seconds longer, but you really did try to be quick for him. Penelope was back at his side first, even though she’d had to run to her lair to get her stuff first. “I’ve got a plan,” she said confidently, with a nod, “I got you into this mess and I’m going to get you out, Reid, I promise.”

He smiled weakly. He felt as if he had resigned himself to whatever might happen now. It was as if he’d lost his agency, like his life was continuing around him but he’d lost all say in the narrative. Penelope placed a hand on his arm, a gesture, before you, Derek and Emily emerged from the office and the five of you stepped into the elevator.

There was little small talk on the ride down. Everyone was exhausted, after all. A couple of cases in a row would do that to you, especially when you finally had a day where the adrenaline had left you and you were left to catch up on all the sleep you had missed to replenish the energy lost. Penelope was buzzing beside you though, bobbing up and down on her heels in anticipation of something, and you wondered whether she had a date or something.

Spencer rested his head against the wall. You squeezed his hand again. He could tell you were beginning to worry there was actually something wrong, that he wasn’t just tired, so he squeezed in return. That seemed to do the trick.

You were just walking out of the building waving your ‘goodbye!’s and ‘see you tomorrow!’s when Garcia squealed. Actually squealed, loudly, right in your ear before screaming as she pointed into the distance.

“Bruno Mars!”

And then she was suddenly off, sprinting into a crowd of people that all had their backs turned, looking in the direction of Penelope’s pointing. You squinted. Where? Derek and Emily shared a look behind you and ran after Penelope, pushing through the crowd and shouting themselves. Suddenly, Spencer didn’t feel so tired as he full on grinned after his friends, particularly Penelope, who had definitely more than made up for her earlier slip. He’d make sure to text her later.

“Surely she can’t have seen Bruno Mars,” you mused aloud, still stuck in place from the shock of the squeal, “Although there is a crowd, I guess.”

You shrugged, still looking carefully. Suddenly, he was worried you were going to pull him into the crowd and everything would go wrong. But you looked at him to your side, his hand still in yours and reached up with your opposite hand to push some hair behind his ear.

“Let’s get you home, mister.”

He couldn’t stop himself, even if it ruined the whole plan.

“You don’t want to see Bruno Mars?”

“No,” you laughed simply, “Not when it’s probably fake and my favourite genius looks like he’s about to fall asleep on the sidewalk.”

You tugged him with you towards the car. He followed behind you with a spring in his step he tried to disguise, glancing back at the crowd to find Penelope grinning at him, two thumbs up in air. He nodded at her. She knew she was entirely forgiven. Not that she wouldn’t have been anyway.

It only really hit him later that night, with your head resting on his chest and your hands entwined on his stomach that you loved him enough to skip out on seeing Bruno Mars, just to take care of him.

As he looked down at your sleeping face, his dopey proposal eyes were back again. There was no getting rid of them now.

---

taglist (ily all <3)

@mrs-dr-reid @soda610 @alexxcorona113 @thupidalethea @may-beforejune-afterapril @ilovesupersoldiers @hurricanejjareau @stardream14 @mortallythoughtfulgurl @aperrywilliams @saranyx @anotherspencerreidblog @thegayestdestielshipper @burkgolden @reidsmyhusband-emilysmymistress @zozoleesi @baumindss

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fluff

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365days365movies · 4 years ago

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May 10, 2021: Blade Runner 2049 (2017) (Recap: Part Two)

Said I’d talk about artificial humans in sci-fi, so...

There are a HELL of a lot of examples of artificial humans in science-fiction, as well as the ethical and philosophical concepts that their existence raises. Now, your definition of “artificial” may differ from medium to medium. At its base form, these are humans that are not born, but made. I’ll be talking fleshy organic humans, not robotic ones. The most common of these is, of course, clones.

A clone, strictly speaking, is a genetically identical copy of a pre-existing organism, in this case a human. While this isn’t technology we’ve applied to humans as of yet (due to the NUMEROUS ethical problems and questions), we have done so with animals, mostly sheep and cats. It’s actually a good way to de-extinct certain species, and we’ve already done experiments with that. Of course...that has its own concerns.

Keeping up the Jurassic Park reference streak! Anyway...

There are a FUCKTON of examples of clones in science-fiction, but since I’m a massive comic book nerd, I’ll use Superboy. The genetic combination of Superman and Lex Luthor, Conner Kent is one of the most prominent clone superheroes. He’s not the only clone of Superman, of course. He’s not even my favorite clone of Superman, to be honest...

Bizarro am the worst. ME WILL LIVE ON THAT HILL.

Oh, and let’s not forget THE most prominent artificial human in comic books PERIOD. I don’t care what her origin in the movies is, that’s never been my favorite version of Wonder Woman. Making her a demigod robs her of something important, in my opinion.

...Should I make a comic book blog? Shit, thinkin’ about it.

OK, before I do that, these are just my favorite examples. Fact is, there are FAR too many examples of artificial humans to go into, whether they’re built, grown, sculpted, conjured, or a chemical reaction with an extra ingredient in the concoction.

And look, I could go on all day about this, but we got a long-ass movie to get back to. SO, lets jump back in. Part One is here!

Recap (2/2)

Understandably exhausted, K returns home, confused and conflicted. However, he’s greeted with a surprise from Joi: a prostitute! Namely, this is Mariette (Mackenzie Davis), one of the girls who approached him earlier. Joi’s called her here in order to be “real” for K, the effect is impressive, if somewhat...off-putting. Still, while K obviously didn’t need this to be happy with their relationship, Joi might, and Mariette’s all on board.

And it doesn’t take K terrible long to get on board, either. As both Mariette and Joi strip, it makes me wonder...how much does this subscription service for Joi cost. There’s no goddamn way this is free, right? Like, how exclusive IS this AI? And they cut from that scene to a Joi commercial, where we hear that Joi becomes anything you want her to be, and does anything you want her to do. But something tells me that...well, that it’s not quite so simple.

Once the night is over, Joi tells Mariette to leave, and not nicely either. Mariette leaves, rebuking her on the way out as well. K, meanwhile, knows that the Blade Runners will soon be coming after him. He’ll be going on the run, and Joi wants to go with him. And so, they put her inside of a remote device, while deleting her information from the main apartment console. This gets the attention of Luv, who head over to the apartment to figure out what’s going on.

K goes to Doc Badger (Barkhad Adbi), who analyzes the horse for him. It’s discovered that old radiation can be found there, and that amount and kind of radiation can only be found in areas where a dirty bomb has been set off. This would be in the desolate and weird-ass ruins of Las Vegas. While nobody lives there at this point, K and Joi go to check it out.

An IMMENSELY frustrated Luv, unaware of K’s discovery about himself, goes to confront Joshi about K’s whereabouts. Luv berates her for being afraid of change, and tells her that she “can’t fend off the tide with a broom”. Which is a great line. However, as Joshi is no use to her at this point, Luv just straight up kills her. Which, I’m sure, will go over well with the whole “Replicants aren’t dangerous” thing.

Meanwhile, in Vegas...shit is WEIRD. First off all, the desolate wasteland is full of statues of giant sexy wimmin, and I mean GIANT statues. Beneath one of them is a series of beehives, which K goes into to get a hand of beeeees. After that, he goes into an abandoned hotel/casino, rigged with tripwires and booby traps. OK. What.

So, somebody’s using this place as a hideaway, despite the entire city being destroyed by a dirty bomb, and probably extremely radioactive. K searches around and finds it empty. He begins to play a piano, hoping to draw someone out. He ends up drawing out a dog, as well as the inhabitant of the hotel.

Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford), baby! Quoting Stevenson’s Treasure Island and holding K up at gunpoint with dog at side is the original Blade Runner himself, Rick Fucking Deckard. God, I love this. Deckard hunts K down throughout the casino, where we see some trippy holograms, and the future of Vegas stageshows (probably).

The two fight, but eventually call a truce and decide to get a drink at the bar. K gets to it pretty quickly, and confronts Deckard on his potential child with Rachael. He confirms that Rachael was indeed pregnant by him, but he had never met his child. Which was the plan, to be fair. He wanted their child to be protected, not hunted down and eventually dissected.

Sometimes, to love someone...you gotta be a stranger.

To an old Frank Sinatra song, a forlorn K (now calling himself “Joe”) looks around, and sees carved wooden animals that resemble the horse that’s haunted his life and memories so much by this point. Which makes sense, considering the foil unicorn from the previous film. Neat little tie-in there.

But paradise is not all it’s cracked up to be, as someone soon comes to find both K and Deckard, despite the fact that K came alone. Although, now that I think about it, Joi may not be one that you can truly trust. Deckard and K try to escape their pursuers, but are caught pretty quickly. In the process, K is injured, but manages to get up in order to fight back. However, this is Luv with these people, and she beats K down EASILY. Turns out that Luv is actually an enforcer, rather than just a secretary. And when Joi awakens from K’s device to ask her to stop, well...she kills the device, and she kills K. In the process, she also takes Deckard away, leaving K behind. Fuck.

K wakes up, only to discover Mariette standing over him in the Las Vegas wasteland. She takes care of him as he wakes up, also stitching up with wounds from the explosion. She tells K to trust her, as well as her compatriots. One of them is the hooded woman from earlier, a Replicant named Freysa (Hiam Abbass). An old friend of Sapper’s she saw the delivery of the child, the “miracle”, and also hid the child away, as it was a symbol that the Replicants are more than just slave, that they are their own masters.

Freysa is building a revolution in order to free the Replicants once and for all. And I’m hard-pressed to disagree with their cause, not gonna lie. However, this comes at a price. In order to prevent Wallace from killing the cause, K must prevent Deckard from leading them to Freysa. They must do what they can until they can reveal the child to the world. For she will be their leader.

Fuck.

Understandably COMPLETELY crushed at this revelation, and more confused than ever, K collapses. Freysa tells him that they ALL wish they were the one, and they all believe. It’s at this point, that K realizes exactly who the Hybrid is: Dr. Ana Stelline. The horse from earlier, it turns out, did in fact belong to her, and she planted her childhood memory with the horse in K’s mind as a Replicant. Damn. DAMN! That’s why the memory moved her so: because it was hers.

Meanwhile, Deckard awakens to a separate nightmare: Jared Leto telling him how he feels about him. After all, Deckard helped to create the first Replicant-human hybrid. He asks him for his help in obtaining the child, so that the key of Replicant reproduction can be further unlocked. And he proceeds in convincing Deckard by playing audio of Rachael and his first meeting (from the first film, of course).

Niander fucks with him further, by suggesting Deckard was summoned all those years ago specifically to fall in love with Rachael in order to father a child with her. But despite all of this, Deckard refuses to give up any of his information. And so, Niander pulls out his ace-in-the-hole...and it’s a real shitty thing to do to a man in mourning.

Damn. Dude rebuilt Rachael, tries to tempt Deckard with her, FAILS, then lets Luv shoot her in the head. Fucking power move, and fuck Niander for playing it. Dude is a DICK. Meanwhile. that one visual from every single ad of this movie is happening, and I can FINALLY use one of the 8000 GIFs of it, goddamn.

Not gonna lie, it’s an iconic appearance, so I get why it’s so famous. Anyway, K considers a suicidal option, now that he knows the truth. However, before we get to see the final decision, we get to see Deckard being taken back to LA for interrogation by Wallace. However, to prevent him from potentially leading Wallace to the secret of Ana Stelline, K suddenly appears, opening fire on their ship.

The craft is downed, and K exits the car to engage in a firefight with Luv. He appears to win, but Luv isn’t killed once she’s shot. The two have a fistfight out in the rain, and Deckard waits for water to slowly kill the craft that he’s still inside of.

As expected, Luv handles herself well, and despite a number of close calls, she JUST. WILL. NOT. DIE. Damn, she’s resilient. However, despite K, Luv, and Deckard all nearly drowning in an INTENSE fight between the Replicants, an enraged and crazed Luv finally eventually drowns, ending her threat for good.

K saves Deckard from the sinking ship, and agrees to stage his death, allowing him to meet his daughter for the first time. Once at her facility, K returns Deckard’s horse to him, knowing that it was a gift from him. He tells Deckard that his best memories all come from her, implying that this makes him similar to Deckard’s son, which he picks up on when he asks if he’s OK.

Deckard goes to meet his daughter, and K hangs out on the stairs outside. He feels the snow fall on his hand, and he just...watches it all fall around him. He sits, and he watches it all. And meanwhile, Deckard meets his daughter for the first time.

...Can I just say...GODDAMN!

That movie was absolutely stellar, and it’s definitely landing in the high ‘90s for me, calling it now. I...wow. Seriously. Amazing.

See you in the Review!

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aenwoedbeannaa · 5 years ago

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Stone Hearts | Geralt x Reader | Parts I - III

Summary: A/U(ish). When fate landed you at Kaer Morhen, you were mostly just happy to have meals to eat and a place to sleep. But, as it turns out, fate may have led you to much, much more. (Basically, you and Geralt are students at Kaer Morhen together. These stories chronicle your lives together.)

Word Count: 7k+

Warnings: Violence, smut, the usual.

A/N: I originally planned on posting this as a series of short stories all at once, but as it is such a long story, I decided I’d split it up into groups of stories instead. So, this one is Part I, II, and III. Let me know what you think – and thank you, as always, for taking time to read my work 😊.

Thank you so much to @jesseswartzwelder for the request/amazing idea!

If you enjoy my work, consider reblogging this post following me for more Witcher fics here and on my personal/original writing blog here. You can also check out my masterlist!

Part I

The sun is hot, bearing down on the crowded courtyard and making you sweat through your leathers even more than you usually do. Still, you refuse to give any inkling of the fact that your blood is absolutely boiling, like your body is burning itself away. You know that it is more than the hot sun—you’ve started taking a new elixir, and ever since, you’ve been aching with fever. One moment, you are burning out of your skin, the next, you are shivering and sweating at the same time.

Your feet move of their own accord, purely out of instinct, as you dodge and parry, pirouette and deflect. You try as hard as you possibly can to breathe deeply and slowly, so as not to exert yourself even more. And yet, the sharp sound of dulled iron striking dulled iron reverberates you your head, loud enough to make you want to flinch.

But flinching is not an option. Not with Geralt, anyways. You don’t like losing, especially to your de facto partner. As usual, the two of you are the last pair left sparring, the others standing around drinking deeply from waterskins or laying on unclaimed ground nursing whatever wounds they incurred over the course of the day. You wish you were one of them, but only a little. If you are honest, you love being the center of attention; you love being one of Kaer Morhen’s Golden Children. You thrive one it.

“Getting tired, Witcher?” you quip, avoiding a slash of his blade with a rolling dodge, landing on your feet in a flash and only just missing him with your next attack.

“Not a chance, Witcher Girl,” he responds with a parry leading to an attack of his own. You manage to block him with the flat of your blade, but you can tell that you are off – not enough for an ordinary eye to see, but Geralt does not have the eyes of an ordinary man.

He’s got you backed up nearly to the wall, leaving you less room than you’d like, and distracting you enough with his smile, a dangerous flash of white, that you nearly lose your footing. But after another turn and other quick flurry of attacks and counterattacks, you do lose your footing – but it has nothing to do with Geralt’s smile and everything to do with a sudden blinding pain that seems to start in your head and travel down your body at lighting speed. You crumple to the ground.

Geralt drops his sword before you even hit the dirt, rushing to you side and placing a calloused hand gently on your shoulder, speaking urgently, “Y/N,” he says as he gently pushes against your shoulder to turn you over, “Are you alright? What happened?” What has him so worried is not that you fell – the two of you never went easy on one another, and each took your share of tumbles. No, he is worried because you had been steady on two feet one moment and wincing, dropping your sword, and thudding to the ground after it the next.

You have, of course, told him nothing about the extra elixir. You’d tried so many at this point that you’d grown into a sense of security, like something that couldn’t possibly harm you. After all, the really deadly shit was saved for the Trial of the Grasses – but even then, the strong ones usually made it, and you are one of the strong ones. But, no matter how many times you tell him not to worry – he always, always does. The same way that you worry about him every time you learn they’re giving him new mysterious concoctions to try.

He is you closest friend, and he has been since the moment you walked onto the grounds of Kaer Morhen and he punched Eskel in the face for lobbing an ill-timed joke at the very timid new arrival and making you cry.

Vizimir was not happy with any of you, and all three of you managed to earn yourselves extra cleaning duties that week. Geralt for punching Eskel, Eskel for making ‘unnecessary remarks,’ and you for crying. Coincidentally, that week was also the week that the three of you began a friendship that spanned even to this day.

You blink up at him, unable to speak, though you want to. Something is wrong, you want to say, Get Vizimir. But, try as you might, you aren’t able to make your mouth form the words. Instead, you just stare up at him with wide eyes. His brown curls are stuck to his brow with sweat, and his eyes are searching your eyes for an answer you can’t give him. You are also vaguely aware of other students abandoning their carefully staked out plots of grass to come and see what the fuss is about.

The only other girl, Estra of Ard Caraigh, chews her lip nervously as she looks on, though you can’t see her. The two of you aren’t particularly close, mostly because she is two years older, so you are surprised when you hear her voice from the growing crowd of onlookers, “They gave you that elixir, didn’t they? The one that’s to make sure you can train every day of the month?”

In your bleary half-consciousness, you see a flash of long auburn hair as she rushes to your side, pressing a hand to your forehead. Her face blanches and she turns back to shout to no one in particular, “Get Vizimir, NOW.”

You try once more to make some sort of sound, but all that comes out is a choked sob. You had not cried since your first day here, and the fact that tears were streaming down your face seemingly of their own accord was mortifying. The only thing that kept your from screaming in pain was Geralt as he took your hand in his own and held on tightly, leaning down to whisper that it was all going to be ok in a voice surprisingly calm given the red-hot fire burning in his eyes and his tightly clenched jaw.

Part II

Your fingers tap the glass impatiently as you peer out the window, checking for signs of life on the road that winds from the gate of the Keep out into the forests surrounding Kaer Morhen, twisting its way through the wilderness surrounding the Snow Pine Mountains. If you’ve calculated correctly, Geralt should be returning today. He left nearly two weeks before with one of the Witchers to help with a contract on a Drowner infestation plaguing a nearby town on the banks of some manmade lake.

Leave it to Kaedwen. Perhaps the people of Kaedwen had grown too comfortable. With Witchers nearby, there wasn’t much to fear from monsters, was there?

This particular excursion was his reward for being the first to return from the Trial of the Medallion – the chance to muck around in the swamps for a few days, cutting down drowners at thirty crowns a head.

Thirty crowns a head.

You still remember a time when thirty crowns seemed an unobtainable amount of money; money that could have lasted your family near a month if it had to. To think that once this was all over, you would be able to fulfill contracts earning multiples of that for each monster slain. Being considered at once a poor victim of a stolen childhood and a mutant freak who had no place existing was a small price to pay for such a steady income.

“Show me a lake, and I’ll show you the drowners,” as Vizimir would say.

Pulling yourself back from the objectively horrifying daydreams of hacking drowners to shreds in return for a sack full of coin, you resume your vigilance.

Accounting for the four days ride from Kaer Morhen, maybe five if any monsters appeared on The Path, and then three days at most to deal with the drowners, and then another four to five days ride back accounting for the supplies they’d be carrying back from the village, he should be arriving back today. Unless of course… No. You cannot allow yourself to even consider the possibility that anything had gone wrong.

You tell yourself you that the nervous energy that has you buzzing is simply born of boredom, or maybe out of frustration that you’d have to spar with Eskel today. After nearly two weeks pouring over books, Vizimir had finally determined that it was time to get back to swordsmanship and, most importantly, sparring. It was about the only thing that broke the general dullness of school.

And without Geralt, you tell yourself, sparring will be just as dull as the bloody books. You determine that this is at least a half-truth. Geralt was the only sparring partner quite at your level. So, it went without saying that sparring with anyone else was dull, mostly a waste of time. In your opinion, fighting an easy fight is not fun. And that’s not even your ego talking; it is purely factual.

And a bit of ego.

And then there is the separate issue; the fact that you hadn’t exactly realized – or had at least pretended not to realize – just how much time you spent with Geralt until he was gone. You’d been happy for him when he won the Trial of the Medallion, of course, but you hadn’t been quite as thrilled when you learned what the prize was. Sure – it was a chance for him to escape form the stone fortress for two weeks, a chance to get out and see the world. But drowners, no matter how easy to kill, could always be dangerous. Or maybe you were just upset that the second place winner – that just so happened to be you – didn’t get to go along as well. You’d finished only second behind him; it seemed unfair.

Despite its unfairness, it was reality. So, instead of out hunting monsters, you were stuck here while time dragged on at an excruciating crawl.

You’ve got other students with whom to pass the time, but to be honest, exploring the grounds of Kaer Morhen Of course, you still have your other fellow students to pass the time with – which you do – but it’s not the same. There is a bond between the two of you that far surpasses your bond with anyone else. No matter how adamantly you try to ignore it, there’s just no way around it.

You sigh in frustration and turn away from the window; you have too many things to do, regardless of how absolutely tedious everything is. Studying with Vizimir, of course. And you’ve got to spar today. At least that is somewhat interesting – even if none of the other students can quite match you; with the exception of Geralt. It is a convenient way for you to explain away any feelings. Perhaps sparring with people who cannot keep up is just boring. As much as you enjoy winning, there’s no excitement winning against people you could probably best in your sleep.

You pull on your last bits of armor – a belt with a small sheath for your dagger, and of course your leather jerkin. Your dulled iron and silver are slung over your back. You won’t receive your silver – a real silver sword – until you pass the trial of the grasses. It would, of course, be a waste to supply every one of Kaer Morhen’s students with new silver swords, considering the unfortunate reality that a majority would never need one.

Gods, you hope you need one.

You move silently through the ancient hallways, bracing yourself for the certain boredom that will greet you in the keep’s library. It is a large room full of old books, most of which are yellowed with age and feel as if they might fall apart beneath your fingertips. Vizimir explains that new books are not necessary, because monsters never change.

“Wonderful of you to finally join us, Little Vampire,” Vizimir says as you push open the wooden door to see several students sitting at the old tables all in various states of half-sleep. You just shrug in response and make your way to an empty chair. You earned the nickname Little Vampire after, during the week you spent delirious with fever, you apparently bit Vizimir’s hand hard enough to leave a scar when he tried to force a potion down your throat.

“Probably off waiting for Geralt,” you hear Stefan say under his breath to Eskel, who is sitting in the chair next to him. You pretend not to hear him; you’ve given up on trying to explain your relationship with Geralt to your peers. And anyway, it would be impossible to explain even if you tried – you cannot even explain it to yourself.

But then, you hear Eskel mutter, even quieter – “He probably won’t be back until tomorrow. Off spending that hard-earned coin the right way.” You know that it shouldn’t bother you; Geralt can do whatever he’d like. And what you’d learned from hearing Eskel and the others when they spoke about their time outside of Kaer Morhen, there was a very specific way they tended to celebrate. It wasn’t your place to be upset about it. And, yet, here you were.

Whatever, you tell yourself. He’s only following the Code. That fucking Code.

* * *

“Fucking hell,” Eskel spits, pushing himself up from the ground, heavily favoring his left ankle. You smirk, sheathing the blunted blade. You don’t need to say anything – knocking him out of the fight as quickly as you had spoke volumes.

“And all this time, we thought Geralt was just letting her win, eh, Eskel?”

You turn and narrow your eyes at Stefan, their dark amber burning like coals as you bore into him. You aren’t daft – you are fully aware of this particular rumor, as ridiculous of a rumor as it is.

“Would have been quite the charade to have been pulling off all these years.”

You have a hard time suppressing your smile at the familiar baritone, but you turn around with witcherlike reflexes regardless. And Code be damned, for all the elixirs they’d given you, emotion flooded you. You refuse to call it love; to be a Witcher and admit to such a feeling would be laughable. But you will call it joy – joy at seeing your absolute closest friend in the world after all this time.

A whole two weeks.

Not wanting to make yourself, and Geralt by extension, the butt of jokes for the next month, you stop yourself from barreling toward him and throwing your arms around his neck like you want to, you settle for smiling instead.

“Finally,” you drawl, “A real challenge.”

Your friend smirks, arms crossing over his chest.

“I’ve just returned, and the first thing you want to do is cross swords?” he fakes offense.

“Of course,” you retort, “This is Kaer Morhen, after all.”

“Damn,” Geralt responds, “Thought it was Ban Aard.”

Several others who had abandoned their activities to listen laughed at that one – you included. Fucking mages and their fancy schools, preaching about the importance of magic Witchers’ reliance on it. Ban Aard and Aretuza were the butt of a good number of jokes at Kaer Morhen, like Kaer Morhen certainly was to them.

“Enough standing around and talking,” you goad, “Grab your sword, Witcher.”

You ignore the hushed conversations around you as Geralt replaces the silver sword slung over his back with a dull iron one. The usual nonsense – something about the two of you thriving on attention and showing off and something else about the two of you needing to “just fuck already.”

He seems to be ignoring the group just as you are, reading himself as you do the same.

“Alright, Witcher,” you smile dangerously, “Let’s see if those Drowners sharpened your skills."

Part III

“It just doesn’t feel real,” you muse, turning over your shoulder to glance at Geralt who sits with his back flush against yours, “Only two days until the Trials.”

“Mhm,” he answers from deep in his chest. While you have chosen to cover up your panic and fear with excitement and fierce pride, Geralt has turned to philosophizing – existentialism and cynicism being his philosophies of choice.

“Geralt…” you mutter, wishing that you could get more than a syllable or two out of him. “It’s going to be ok.”

You are trying to convince yourself just as much as you are trying to convince him. And, given your tendency to turn everything into a game of logic – very useful in calculating opponents next moves – chances are high that you are correct.

“We’ve both responded well to all of the elixirs they’ve given us, hardly any negative reactions at all,” you expound, but Geralt scoffs, making your mouth snap shut.

“Yes, except that one time two years back when you almost died.” His voice is laced with worry, and though you are facing opposite directions, you know exactly what his expression by his tone alone. His eyebrows are knitted together, and his amber eyes are narrowed such that from a distance, someone might not notice that he was undergoing mutations at all. His lips are pressed into a tight line, and his curls fall into his face. That, combined with his bulky form, would make anyone stay away. Anyone except for you.

“That was one time,” you press, “One elixir out of hundreds. It’s a better record than most people.” Kaer Morhen was your home and you truly wanted to become a Witcher. If you’d been left alone in Crookback Bog, you would have died years ago. And if you’d grown up in some backwater village or in the poor district of a city, plague or pox could’ve taken you. For you, the potions and elixirs and the mutations they induced were just the inevitable tradeoffs to life here. If you couldn’t survive the trials, you couldn’t be a Witcher, and if you couldn’t become a Witcher, you’d be on your own with no skills to speak of, no way to make a living. At least Kaer Morhen gave you something akin to a family – it had given you Geralt.

“I don’t care to remember any details of that week,” he mutters, looking at the ground and shaking his head, “But I… I can’t stop thinking about it. About you laying there burning with fever, calling out in your sleep.”

You are stunned. Geralt, while not as closed off as the other students and Witchers liked to say, was not apt to speak with such emotion. You can’t remember the last time you heard him stumble over his words like that – or if you ever had, for that matter. You open your mouth to speak, about how that was quite a regular occurrence for Kaer Morhen’s students as they underwent mutations, but he is already speaking again before you can get a word out.

“You kept saying that you were on fire, your bones were on fire,” you pick at the grass as he continues, “And the elixirs to help the pain only made it worse.”

Truth be told, you don’t have much memory of that week of your life. You were delirious with fever, and only remember brief moments that you could not definitively place in the “real” category or mark them off as hallucinations. But, as he speaks, some memories do pop into your mind. One in particular where it took three grown men to hold you down and force one of the elixir’s down your throat. Vizimir started calling you Little Vampire after that, thanks to the fact that your perfectly average canines managed to dig so deep into his hand that he still had a scar. Now, you supposed, you understood why Geralt didn’t like that one.

“I just… I can’t…” as Geralt stumbles over his words, you cannot tell if you are hearing his heart hammering or yours. You follow your immediate urge and turn around to sit next to him, both of you now looking out towards the grounds of Kaer Morhen through the trees. You’ve had this secret meeting place for years – a place where the two of you would go to talk or just to sit. A peaceful place, away from the constant chaos behind the castle walls.

“Geralt,” you say, placing a hand on his shoulder and shifting so that he is facing you, “You’re the strongest of all of us. Even Vizimir said…well, you remember!” You are referring to a conversation you overheard one evening when you were prowling around places you shouldn’t be. He was talking to one of the other instructors, the two of them comparing notes.

“Geralt, Y/N, and Eskel will be this year’s Three, mark my words.”

“There’s no need to be scared,” you add after a moment, voice quiet. You hadn’t known he was so scared to undergo the mutations. He was always the best in your training exercises, always the strongest, the fastest, the one getting all the special elixirs. You hadn’t even thought that he might still be worried.

Quite suddenly, he turns, placing his hand over the one of yours that is resting in your lap, “I’m not worried for myself. I just… I can’t… It makes me so angry to think of them putting you through that again.”

You look down, staring at his hand on top of yours, which is suddenly the only thing that you can focus on. Relationships at Kaer Morhen aren’t forbidden, but they aren’t common. There had been a handful of moments like these – none of them that went farther than stolen glances and they always left you feeling somehow empty, aching for what you couldn’t have.

Silence stretches between you. The only sound either of you make are the thundering of our hearts and carefully controlled breathing. Though, you notice, each time Geralt breathes in, there is a slight unsteadiness to it, a shakiness, as if he is trying as hard as you are to keep your breathing in check.

Finally, you draw a breath that would be noticeably shaky, even for a person who hadn’t undergone all of the mutations that the two of you had. You tear your eyes from your hand to look up at him and say, “I’m an adult, Geralt. I’m going through the trials willingly.”

Geralt doesn’t respond, just clenches his jaw and lets out a huff, so you continue, “We’ve always known about the Trials, I agreed to it when I came here, and I’ve continued to agree to it every time that I’ve taken any of their elixirs. I’ve...We’ve been training for this for our whole lives. Without Vizimir I would have died without getting a chance to experience real life.”

“I know the speech,” Geralt shoots back almost immediately, pulling his hand away and leaving you feeling hurt.

“Geralt.” You are struggling to keep your voice steady. You can’t decide if you feel like screaming or crying, so you keep to the Code and shove both of those urges down as deep as is possible given the situation. “It’s not my fault we have to undergo the mutations, so don’t fucking snap at me.”

“Fuck,” Geralt says, shaking his head and burying it in his hands, “Y/N, I’m sorry. I know.”

He is silent for another moment before he finally lowers his hands and looks up at you. You realize in that moment how close you are, your faces only inches apart. You can see the gold flecks in his amber eyes and the stubble on his cheeks and have to fight to ignore the urge to reach out and see how his skin feels beneath your hands, and what his eyes would look like if you did.

But then, he reaches out with one hand, hesitantly and ever so gently, to cup your face. You shiver as the pad of his thumb brushes just beneath your lower lip and the very corner of your mouth. Time feels suspended, as if the two of you are floating on some separate plane where the day of the Trials will never come and the two of you can just stay right here, just as you are, forever.

“I hate the idea of you undergoing the Trial because I can’t stomach the thought of losing you, Y/N.” The words are like a punch to the stomach that is somehow pleasant, knocking all the breath out of your lungs.

He leans even closer, until your foreheads are touching. “I know the Code, and I know I’m not supposed to, but I love you.”

You breathe in, memorizing the smell of him. You’ve only ever been this close during sparring exercises. You decide you like this a lot better.

“When I had the fever… The one thing that kept me, you know, here was you, you know,” you breathe. You’ve never told him because you know that no matter how much he had pretended to hate it as of late, he sticks to the Code. The Code, which doesn’t look highly on Witchers being in relationships – especially with one another. “And that’s why—and you’re the reason I know that I’ll survive the Trial.” Your eyes have drifted down, unable to meet his as you confess this – the secret you have been hiding from him for so long.

He is silent for a moment, frozen there with his deliciously warm hand on your face before finally letting his and slip lower, resting under your chin and gently tilting your head up so that he can meet your eyes. “Fuck the Code,” he says, eyes flashing before pressing his lips to yours.

It is your first kiss, and it is pure bliss. Your lips fit together like pieces of a puzzle and the sensation has you drunk with pleasure before he even deepens the kiss. And, when he does, you are ready. You part your lips for him, and he greedily explores your mouth. You keep thinking that it can’t get any better, but yet it does. You moan involuntarily as his hand slips from your chin, ghosting along the curve of your neck and coming to rest on your shoulder, calloused thumb sweeping across your collar bone.

His touch is electric, leaving your skin feeling hot and charged, and longing for more. Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling yourself flush against him. He responds with an appreciative grunt, moving his hands to explore your body, starting by sweeping down your sides, just barely grazing the sides of your breasts in the process.

With his hands now firmly wrapped around your sides, he breaks the kiss, leaving you in a huff of frustration and disappointment – you hadn’t had nearly enough of him. But before you can get too out of sorts, his lips touch your neck and you moan, tipping your head back to grant him complete access. You don’t even have time to worry about the fact that you have no idea what you’re doing – that you have never done this before – because Geralt is so thorough, so in control of the situation. It’s like he knows all the right places to touch, and exactly what to do with his mouth to have you breathing heavily, small sounds of pleasure slipping through your lips.

Tentatively, you begin exploring his body with your hands. You love the way that his muscled form feels beneath your fingers, and it makes you want to explore every inch. As your hands move down his chest, you find yourself tugging at his shirt. You don’t know if it is an involuntary reaction to his teeth grazing your neck as his lips continue down to your collarbone or whether it is simply a feeble attempt to pull the fabric away because you would very much like to know what his sculpted abdomen feels like beneath your fingers without the offending material in the way.

Geralt’s hands, on the other hand, have gripped your white linen shirt, identical to his own, and already began pulling it over your head. You raise your arms to make it easier for him, and the moment it is off, you greedily reach for his own tugging the material up and over his head. For a moment, you just stare at him, drinking in the sight of him shirtless before you. It wasn’t as if you had never seen him this way – but you had always done your best not to look too long, afraid that he would notice as question why.

However, he interrupts your moment of slightly embarrassing admiration when he wraps his arms around you, hands grazing your hyper-sensitive skin. You sigh, content to let him touch every inch of you. Encouraged by this, his hands wander up to unlace your bra and you bite your lip in anticipation. You cannot wait to feel his hands on them, arching your back, willing him to make faster work of it.

He grins as he slips the material off your shoulders, grin turning into more of a smirk as he sees you staring back at him with wide, expectant eyes. He slides one hand up your back, easing you down so you are laying beneath him, eyes drinking in the sight of you naked form and making your feel suddenly exposed. But, given the way his pupils dilate, he likes what he sees as much as you do.

He leans over you, lowering himself so that he can bring his lips to yours once more. You greedily bite his lower lip, hands back to their game of exploring as much of his body as you can reach. And then all of a sudden, you feel his stubbled cheek graze against yours as he leans to growl in your ear, “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this to you, Witcheress.”

His words add fuel to the fire burning in your core, and you whimper as his fingers brush your nipple. It feels so delicious it is almost painful. You’ve never even allowed yourself to fantasize about this scenario, as much as you may have wanted to. You never thought it would happen – and you weren’t one to dream of impossible things. And yet, here you both were.

“Geralt,” you breathe, completely lost I the feeling as he kneads and pinches your breasts. And then… his lips. The feeling of them against your breast and his tongue flattening against your nipple is warm and soft and better than you could have ever imagined it feeling. Your eyes roll up into your head as he makes use of his free hand to gently twist and pinch the bud not currently receiving the attention of his tongue.

Heat pools in your core, twisting and tightening and aching for his touch, and, oh gods, for his tongue. Any nerves you thought you would have doing this for the first time have evaporated. There is no room in your pleasure-drunk mind for nervous thoughts.

Once again, seemingly able to read your thoughts, he slips a hand between the two of you, unfastening your belt and unlacing your trousers. For a brief moment, your mind blinks to a thought of just how practiced his hands are – but you don’t dwell on it for more than a split second. You are burning with need, and you could care less how many women Geralt has had before you – if the stories of the young man’s exploits on those rare occasions when Kaer Morhen’s young Witchers in training were given leave to take on smaller contracts here and there under supervision of elders – it doesn’t matter to you right now.

It matters even less when his hand slips into your waistband, expert fingers finding their way to where you need him most. His finger dips between your folds, gathering the wet heat pooled there for him, humming appreciatively against your chest as he lets his finger trail back up to the little bundle of nerves. His touch is perfect parts gentle and firm as he circles the small bud, making you cry out into the open air.

“You like that, Witcheress?” he asks gruffly, swirling his finger again and making you buck your hips against his hand. Making yourself form words is pretty much hopeless at this point, with his finger dancing over the hard little nub that no one save yourself has ever touched before, but your pleasured cries are more than enough answer for him.

He loves watching you like this – writhing beneath him, hips moving of their own accord, eyes blinking open and closed again. He especially loves your little gasps; the way your pretty mouth stays open in a constant ‘oh’ as he works you with his fingers. Your ragged breathing turns him on even more; your breasts rising and falling at uneven intervals as he increases his pace and pressure. And, oh gods, he loves the groan that escapes your lips when he does.

“Gods,” you say with a great deal of effort, “That feels… G-geralt!”

He watches you as your body tenses for a moment, amber eyes fixed on you as he watches you fall apart, already committing this image to memory; the first time you’d come for him. You are still twitching as the aftershocks of your orgasm wrack your body when he grabs your waistband and tugs your pants off roughly, breathing in your scent and greedily taking in the sight of you.

Your thighs tremble as he presses his lips to the inside of your calf, peppering the soft skin with kisses as he moves his way up your leg. You are still reeling from your orgasm, but already you need more. His hands follow his lips, massaging the seemingly always sore muscles of your legs and making you sigh with pleasure.

You reach down to run a hand through his hair, and he lifts his amber eyes to meet yours as he moves to your other leg, pressing kisses across ever inch of your skin. His tongue traces the crease between your thigh and your most intimate area, and your hips thrust towards his face of their own accord. But then a thought enters your mind, and you tug at his hair, “Geralt.”

“Yes, Witcheress?” he says, locking you in his intense gaze.

“I should… Shouldn’t I? You know…?” You can feel his bulge through his pants, and you are eager to touch him, to feel his hardness with your fingers, your tongue, and inside of you. But for now, Geralt clearly has other plans.

“Shh, Witcheress,” he says, nipping gently at your inner thigh with his teeth, “I’m not done with you yet.” His words send your mind into a whirl as his hands slip under your thighs to your ass, letting his shoulders hold your already quivering legs apart so that you are completely exposed to him. You whimper as he blows cool air on your heat, making you shiver.

“I’m going to fuck you,” he says gruffly, eyes locked on yours once again, “But first I want to taste you.” He lets his tongue just barely graze your clit, and you whimper again, on the verge of begging. “I think you’d like that, wouldn’t you, Y/N?”

You can only whimper in response, your need for him an almost painful ache in your core.

“Hmm?” he rumbles, looking up at you with an impish grin, “Didn’t hear you.” You cannot think of a more beautiful sight than Geralt – the boy who was your first friend and the man who you fell in love with little by little until you were mad with it – looking up at you as if you are the only person in the world.

“Y-yes,” you whimper, voice laced with need.

“Mhm,” he growls, finally running his tongue from your opening to the little bundle of nerves. The feeling of his tongue touching you there has you seeing stars. It feels even better than his fingers as he explores you, paying particular attention to the places that make you gasp and tighten your grip on his hair.

He takes his time, savoring the way you taste, better even then he imagined – which he often had despite his efforts not to think of you that way. He’d tried to stick to the Code, he’d tried everything to keep his mind busy – every time he made a trip out of Kaer Morhen, he’d tried to distract himself, but now, as he explores you with his tongue, breathes your scent, feels your soft skin beneath his fingertips, and hears your soft gasps and moans, all he can think is that he has abided by the Code for way too fucking long.

You are absolutely lost in the feeling of his mouth on you. And, when his lips close around your clit, sucking it into his mouth and attacking it with his tongue, you cry out so loud you are almost convinced everyone back in the Keep can hear you, not that you care. He moans against you, delicious vibrations making you cry out again.

His hand has been traveling closer and closer to your entrance, and you find yourself desperately moving your hips, urging him on. This time, he obliges without teasing, seeming as if he couldn’t pull away from you if he wanted to.

He groans along with you as he slips a finger inside of you, stretching you gently. He takes his time here, too, slowly pumping his finger in and out, committing to memory every place that makes you gasp and writhe until he finds that spot. He adds another finger, focusing on the sensitive place inside of you. Your eyes screw shut as he curls his fingers in time with his tongue; he has turned you into a senseless mess.

The pleasure is too much. Every muscle in your body tenses before finally, you release. Your back arches as you cry out, thighs trapping Geralt in place as you ride out wave after wave of pleasure until finally your body goes slack and you fall back against the grass, breathing heavily.

For a moment, Geralt doesn’t move, yellow eyes drinking in the sight of you lying there slowly coming back to your senses. When your breathing has somewhat returned to normal, he slowly kisses up your body until he reaches your lips, capturing you in a kiss that seems to last forever, but still not long enough. You can taste yourself on his tongue and it drives you mad.

You are already reaching down, desperately and clumsily attempting to yank off his pants, wanting there to be nothing between the two of you. He helps you with the task, kicking off his boots and tossing his remaining clothing to the side. You watch him, eyes committing every muscle and every scar to memory, and finally you allow yourself to look lower.

It takes you a moment to realize that you’re staring, eyes wide as you consider the size of him. Not that you have anything to compare it to, but he is huge, and, considering the only thing that had been inside you before this day are your own fingers, you shiver at the thought of it. He lowers himself back onto his elbows, eyes finding yours as he brushes stray strands of hair from your sweat-soaked forehead as you blink up at him through your lashes, chewing your lower lip, feeling equal parts nervous and impatient.

As your heart hammers in your chest, he leans down to press his lips against the sensitive spot at the crook of your neck, positioning himself between your legs. You whimper as he teases you with the head of his large cock, sliding it from your entrance to your clit and back again, pausing there when all you wanted was for him to push himself inside you.

And all at once, he does. You draw in a sharp breath at the mix of pain and pleasure. He holds still for a moment, letting you adjust to the size of him. You hadn’t thought it’d feel this good. You’d not had much in the way of women to tell you about things like this here at Kaer Morhen. Most of what you learned, you learned from the boys – and you’d learn to take anything you heard from them with a grain of salt. But this – gods. It felt like pure bliss.

Finally, he slowly drew out and thrust back in again, groaning into the space between your neck and shoulder. By his third thrust, you were already raising your hips to meet his, wanting more, faster, harder. But Geralt was taking his time, despite your fingers raking his back, leaving red marks that could be mistaken for claw marks, in all honesty.

“Geralt,” his name spills from your lips in something between a sigh and a moan. He responds by kissing your neck, then moving up to kiss your lips, the two of you lying there, drinking each other in, hips moving harder and faster as he fills you up over and over again, somehow hitting every single spot inside of you, making you whimper beneath him.

You are both sweating, breathing heavily, and clawing at each other as if your lives depend on exploring every part of one another. His thrusts are even, though. A perfect rhythm that has you repeating his name over and over like a prayer. Each time, he hits that spot, and you feel that tightening in your belly, like a coil. And then, all of a sudden, it snaps, and you are lost in a sea of pleasure.

He finishes almost immediately after you, thrusts growing more and more sporadic as he finishes inside you.

The two of you lay there, half-clothed but unworried. No one will stumble upon you out here. Code be damned, you are in love. And for tonight, you are just that – not two people about to undergo the Trials, not a future Witcher and Witcheress – just two young lovers, all tangled up together, staring up at a sky fully of stars, watching the moon rise over the Snow Pine Mountains.

Taglist: @fairytale07, @geeksareunique, @jesseswartzwelder, @haru-ririchiyo, @unnamedmaincharacter, @lazilyscentedwerewolf, @stretchkingblog97, @curlyhairedandconfused, @valkyriepuff, @comicbeginning, @alwayshave-faith, @hp-hogwartsexpress, @angelic-kisses13, @holyhumorliteraturelight, @nogitsunelichen

(Let me know if you’d like to be added!)

#geralt x reader #geralt imagines #geralt of rivia #reader insert #witcher reader #geralt of rivia x reader #story: stone hearts #series #the witcher #the witcher fanfiction #fanfiction #geralt fanfiction #the witcher au #au #witcher school au #fanfiction series

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alitheamateur · 5 years ago

Text

Rumor

A Tommy Conlon One-Shot

Tommy Conlon and Y/N have been attached at the hip since the beginning. Best friends for life, you’d say. Every other member of your lifelong groups of friends saw right through the way you two tended to, and doted on the other, and the rest of the town whispered about the closeness of your so-called “friendship.” They were all crazy with the buzzing gossip, or were they?

Warnings: Language. Fluffity-fluff.

Tommy ushered you through the slightly battered, creaky door of your favorite slimy, local tavern. Once weekly, your impenetrable circle of friends would gather for drinks, no matter how unmanageable your adult schedules may become. The 7 of you had been attached at the hip since high school, vowing to always have time for one another, and never let the woes of work, family or life interrupt.

This week’s decided night was Friday, much to your satisfaction. They all loved giving you the most grief over acting as the so-called ‘mom’ of the group. Always being the cautious one, the responsible one, and the one who painfully hated staying out past 9 on a weeknight. Truthfully, you’d stay home if it wasn’t for Tommy. You loved your friends, the family-knit bond of your group one you held in the deepest of regards. But, sometimes the quiet of your apartment, and a bottle of wine tickled your fancy more than the poignant booming of a crowded bar.

You were about to head directly towards the bar, getting a heads-up on the drinks would be your fastest escape route to get back into your pajamas with that book you had started on your lunch break. As the rest of the friends broke off to a high-top nearest the pool table, Tommy’s hand fell to your back, his finger hooking around the loop of your jeans.

“I’ll get it, Y/N. You go sit, I know you’re tired from work today. The usual?”

Of course, the man knew what your predictable beverage of choice was, and he could always see the look of distant exhaustion behind your eyes if he searched them long enough.

“Same ol’, same ol’ for me, Conlon. Thank you.”

“Comin’ right up. Go take a seat, okay?”

He bent low to kiss you on the cheek, the hair falling into your face clung to his mesmeric lips, not wanting to let go. You didn’t blame them. You love the way his defining smell mixed when it hit your own. The candy sweetness somehow swirled into the perfect mishmash with his mysterious musk. Over his shoulder as he kissed just below your eye and swept your away from your face, Candace, your best friend in the world other than Tommy, was smiling with noticeable sarcasm.

Tommy sauntered towards the blonde tending bar, and you weaved your way to your chattering friends settling into an informal conversation. Of course, the empty seat was next to Candace and her prying, pushy, insinuating mouth.

“What’s with the smile, nosey?” You climbed into the stool, your wispy tank top shifting a bit low around the neckline.

“Oh, nothing at all. Don’t mind me. I’m just watching this re-run where two of my closest friends’ touch, and smile, and silently pine away for each other for the whole damn world to see. Other than themselves, of course.”

You elbowed her, catching the blunt of your nudge into her ribs under the table. No one else in attendance appeared to be registering much into your talk with Candace as they placed bets on a few rounds of pool. Not that the topic of you and Tommy wasn’t one of weekly reoccurrence. They all had their opinions, annoyingly all drawing the same conclusion that you and Tommy Conlon should just make-out and get it over with.

Not that you were against their plan of action. Truthfully, they were all entirely correct. Each and every one of them. But, there was no way you would ever, ever risk the dependable, comfortable bond you and Tommy shared. Things in life were always the opposite of easy for the pair of you, and the hardships only sewed you closer together. Tommy clearly only thought of you as his closest of friends. You were a comfort to him, as he was to you. A strong-tower on a shitty day, and a warm body to keep you company on the couch for The Office binge watch parties.

Before you could ultimately tear into Candace yet again, only managing to toss her a snide eyeroll, Tommy’s hand fell to your shoulder, the other serving your chilled beer.

“A beer for my best lady,” he snarled into your neck, the draft beer on his breath finding its way to your nostrils as the vibrations from his words excited your flesh.

Tommy took off his jacket, draping it messily over the back of your stool, and dragged over to a couple of the guys shooting a competitive game of pool.

Tommy could wash dishes wearing the most ruffled pink apron covered in fuzzy bunnies, and make it seem like tantalizing sex. But, something about watching him throw around a cue stick, his back stretching under his shirt as he leaned to knock in a game winning shot, made your insides squirm in the most welcomed of ways. For you, there was being turned on, and there was being turned on by Tommy Conlon.

Over the passing hours, he had checked in on the fullness of you drinks, escorted you and Candance towards the restroom because there was a crowd of unfamiliar out-of-towners in attendance that he didn’t trust, and simply just tended to you. As he always, always did.

Your beer count was adding up, and ultimately, you began to feel boneless towards the end of the night. Last call was fast approaching, and in tradition, the band of the night played it’s last three songs of their setlist, all slow numbers for those love connections who weren’t quite ready to leave hand in hand, but weren’t exactly ready to part ways, either.

One tune had passed, and the members of your posse found their way onto the sticky dancefloor, peanut shells cracking under all the swaying, unsteady feet.

“Dance? For old times sake. We owe it to the disaster that was fucking junior prom.” Tommy settled his empty mug on your table, his white t-shirt slightest bit damp from the sweat pooling around his neck.

“Hopefully, you’ve learned to avoid my toes by now, Conlon. Or else.” You threatened, using his offering hand to steady your feet onto the floor.

Being the clumsy queen you were, you stumbled a bit, Jell-O legs faltering beneath you, the alcohol clearly not improving your coordination. Tommy’s quick, fighter reflexes jumped to your rescue, his thick forearms caging your waist. The lethal concoction of his breaths falling into the slit of your exposed cleavage, and his furry eyelashes batting around liquor-heavy lids made even your hair sensitive to his closeness.

“Easy there, lightweight. I got ya’.” Tommy half-grinned, standing you up straight, but using his sturdy body to prop you against as he escorted you to the floor of dancing drunks.

The song seemed familiar, but either way it was hypnotizing. It reminded you of Tommy with its sleek rhythm, and raspy lyrics.

Your hands clawed and wound a knot into the back of his shirt, the bone of his broad shoulder blade crawling underneath his tan skinned as he massaged his hand over your back. His hard, rolling muscles made you begin to sweat all of your beer to the surface. You could barely register anyone in the room except for Tommy, but the pierces of eyes on the two of you in embrace kept you just aware of reality.

“Seems someone has gotten a little lighter on their feet since prom…” You toyed, resting your face on his rocky pec.

“The fighting has helped. And, the excellent partner doesn’t hurt, either.”

The beating cadence of Tommy’s heart amped into your ear as he fiddled with the tip ends of your hair.

“Y/N?”

You had gone silent briefly, a bit sleepy with drunkenness, but mostly entranced by just the feel of his dangerous, calloused fingers in your hair, however innocent the sentiment may have been.

“Sorry,” you yawned, gazing up at him. “The day, and my beers are suddenly catching up to me. Let’s finish this song before you take me home, though?”

Tommy simply pulled you back into him, continuing his spinning of circles with you in his arms. His hand once in your mane, had meandered down lower, now barely teasing under the hem of your shirt. Tommy played with the dimples in the small of your back, his palm sliding with ease due to the pearls of sweat on your bare skin.

“Everyone is lookin’ at us, ya’ know.”

“What’s new? They’re always staring at us, aren’t they?”

Tommy used one fingertip to angle your chin to his. “Whaddya’ say we give ‘em somethin’ to look at, Y/N?”

A paramedic would’ve rushed you straight to the hospital had they checked your pulse or temperature in that moment. A bomb of suspense exploded inside you as you searched Tommy’s peaceful, handsome face.

“And what might that be, exactly?”

“They’re always whispering about us, aren’t they? Which I can deal with… If its’ what you’re okay with. But, I would really like to finally give them a real reason to talk. What do you say we make all those rumors about us true, baby?”

His face was painfully close. So close you couldn’t breathe. You needed to run for air, or steal it from his warm mouth. You knew for certain which of your two options would satisfy you most.

“I thought you’d never ask, Conlon.”

Every tiny hair on your body raised in attention and anticipation, your knees threatening to crumble in opposite directions as Tommy sank to you. His nose nudged and grazed over the button tip of yours, just before his lips touched easy onto your mouth. The contact satisfied you in the most exquisite way, and you immediately recalled every kiss from your past, easily deciding they had all come up short. The union of your tongues was sensual, yet firm with eagerness. You could hear Tommy’s kitten like mewl when his lips were opened, moving around over the feverish ones on your face, and you thought it may very well have been the sound that dreams were made of.

Erotic, steamy, crude, pornographic dreams.

Both your hands fisted into Tommy’s silky hair, one palm kneading over the back of his craning neck. You wondered how long you had been molding into him, depriving your lungs of a deep breath, but you would not dare allow his kiss to leave you. Every nerve around your mouth was screaming from the heat, from the touch, from the wet silk of his tongue sucking the strawberry gloss from your mouth, and you knew that with this first embrace, Tommy’s taste would be your most merciless infatuation.

He was the first to break away, only to pepper tidier, gentler kisses across your flushed face. The intimacy of his eyelashes brushing across your cheeks and nose with his lackadaisical blinks caused you to seek immediate contact with the front of his low-slung blue jeans. The button of your light denim grinded into the zipper of his darker ones, and within the confines you felt him hard against you.

“How about when you walk me to my front door tonight, you don’t leave your car running in the driveway?” You muttered dimly and breathily into Tommy’s ear as he held you on the dance floor, the music long stopped.

TAGS: @eap1935 @torialeysha @mollybegger-blog @miidailyinspiration @littleluna98

#tommy conlon #tommy riordan #tommy conlon fanfic #tommy conlon x reader #tommy conlon imagine #tommyconlonfanfic #oneshot #Tom Hardy #tomhardy

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aughraseye · 5 years ago

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Amri

Oh! Absolutely anon! Thanks! BTW for those who haven’t read the books, I think this should be mostly spoiler free.

Why I like them

He’s Amri the Mysterious! If you don’t like him that’s a you problem...

Amri is the goth science kid every friend group needs. He’s funny, inventive, smart, caring, and though he feels out of place a lot of the time he overcomes these anxieties to see the world, go on adventures, make great friends, and fall in love.

I underestimated him when he first appeared but he really rounded out the group, and I’ve come to appreciate all that he adds to not only the stories he’s apart of but also what he adds to the lives of those around him.

Why I don’t

I’ll admit I didn’t like Amri very much in Song of the Dark Crystal but he totally and completely grew on me through Tides and Flames!

At first I didn't really feel like his character was necessary. While that ended up being SO wrong I didn’t initially vibe with his jokes and insecurities. I found him to be a more eccentric and less endearing version of Kylan.

Favorite season/movie

Tides was probably my favorite book for Amri.

Favorite line

“I’ve never heard of Amri the mysterious.”“That says more about you than it does me.”

Amri literally just makes up these monikers for himself all the time. It’s already a power move and then he check mate’s Peris’s uppity Dousan ass with THAT!!! Greatest of all come backs. 10/10

Favorite outfit

I mean…this is hard to say because we didn’t get him on screen. But, I liked when he first left Grot and had to wear his hood super low over his face like some kind of discount mall goth. Very cool.

OTP

Naia and Amri.

Brotp

Amri and Tavra actually. I really enjoyed whenever they worked together.

Tavra took one single look at Amri and thought to herself I’m gonna teach that weird ass nerd some badass shit whether he wants me to or not. 

Head Canon

Amri made the concoction that Maudra Argot gave to Deet for her wing.

Unpopular opinion

Depending on what they have planned for the coming season’s of AOR I’ll be OK (read only mildly disappointed) if Amri doesn’t ever make an appearance. There are a lot of characters as is and I’d prefer if they develop those we already have instead adding more.  

Ideally, he maybe makes a short appearance with lots of hinting/foreshadowing to an eventual relationship with Naia, but otherwise the writing focuses on what we already have.  

No disrespect to Amri, but I just don’t want characters to get forgotten or fall to the wayside in terms of plot or development.  

A wish

Though I don’t necessarily need him to get a full on appearance in AOR I would still really love it if he’s mentioned. Maybe by Deet or Kylan or Naia...there are lots of options to at least make him a canon character in the show.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen

Please don’t fucking put him on the show if he’s just gonna be skeksis fodder.

5 words to best describe them

Smart-ass, inventive, eccentric, nervous, intuitive

#amri #song of the dark crystal #tides of the dark crystal #flames of the dark crystal #age of resistance #the dark crystal #ask meme #mine

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tothediaspora · 7 years ago

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Economic Power of #blackgirlmagic (Pt. 2)

Over the years, I have experienced a transformation in thought, behavior, and emotion. I’ve had the chance to learn about my hair, my ancestral traditions, and grown in conviction about my body being mine to portray as I see fit. I have now understood that the male gaze doesn’t define who I am and how I present myself to the world. In truth, along with many young women, I placed an immense value on how males viewed my body in my formative years. After ten years within the Natural Hair Movement, I increasingly have developed my self-image independent from others’ perception of me. I felt the freedom to change my appearance, the way the hair on my head and body grow, the different ways I express my style and personality. No one has enough influence to change the way I see myself. I also accept that others will do as they please with their own body and with their own hair. Over the years, there has also been a fluctuation in how I have been perceived by the people around me; I allowed myself to subconsciously connect with my ancestors and accept the certain attributes I chose not to change. There were many unexpected changes within my story from the movement being considered a more obscure “Afro-centric” trend of natural beauty to a very striking mainstay and economic powerhouse. I found that one of the objectives that I inadvertently learned during my stake in the Natural Hair Movement is my influence within a collective of other black women and our very own economic power.

My progress in self-knowledge accelerated in the summer of 2008. A few months after my “big chop”, I had more time to explore my hair — hair I’ve always had but never learned how to care for it. Gone were the days of multiple ponytail braids, barrettes, and ribbons I sported in Haiti as a little girl. I no longer wore a perm and felt a bit uneasy about the learning curve of taking care of my hair unaltered by chemicals. Without the corrosive chemicals, I slowly found that I began to limit other very toxic products in my life. I looked up “how to take care of “natural hair” online. In one of the very few links, Nappturality members shared scores of knowledge on African-derived concoctions. I became aware of raw African black Soap. This soap made washing my short hair an ease. After living in dorms for two years, I had sublet an apartment that summer, my first time living alone. I took some of that opportunity to experiment with homemade recipes of fair trade shea butter I ordered online. The products were made in Ghana by other black women that have known about it all of their lives. I felt that I had missed out on this common knowledge and was purposefully miseducated. I had part of my childhood in Haiti and some in the States; in both spaces, I used petroleum-laden hair grease, pomade, Pink Lotion, and Mane n’ Tail products marketed to black women with problematic and toxic ingredients. I realized that my mother and aunts might have been miseducated as well. I then found “Hair Story: Untangling the Roots of Black Hair in America”. This book on black hair history opened my eyes to the amalgamation of African hair tradition, compartmentalized European ideal standards of beauty, and the politics of simply existing with a black body. It sickened me to know how experiences of self-hate entrenched expectations in my family and culture without my people’s knowledge or full awareness.

While perusing message boards and online forums, I learned of other recipes derived from West Africa. I later learned of Whitney White’s YouTube page, Naptural85, she shared simple recipes with oils, raw African black soap, and raw unrefined shea butter. Raw African black soap was now my body wash and sometimes face wash after finishing the last bits of my bottled liquid soaps. My face glistened when I followed a wash with a drop of vitamin e oil and any acne began to dry up. My skin loved this ancestral treatment. I felt free; I was no longer a victim of basic elements of nature. Like many black girls, I was forbidden to go out in the rain, even with an umbrella, if I had just gotten my hair permed. As a child, maintenance in chlorinated water was covering my head with a swim cap over a heaping handful of conditioner streamed through my hair by my mother. At last, I could let the sudden Florida rainfall on my hair without my mood and especially my mother’s mood changing sour. As I learned more, I purchased mostly indie brands. I used the money I saved little by little to travel in the summer of 2009. I no longer needed plenty and regular supply of plastic bottles for shampoos and body washes. I became accustomed to cutting small blocks of raw African black soap from a large brown speckled loaf. With the new knowledge I had acquired, I would quickly put back on the shelf those products I used ritualistically since childhood after one quick reading of the label.

Over time, I began to learn that many products specifically formulated to be marketed to black women have toxic chemicals. I used the internet as a constant resource for information on chemical compounds included in the beauty products that I used regularly. As I read more, I aimed to pick up products that reflected simplicity. I actively avoided over-produced and loaded items in hair products and body care. I began to use tea rinses and heavy oils to replace the moisturizing effects of conditioners. I washed my hair with raw African black soap, rinsed my hair with cooled tea, then used heavy raw unrefined shea butter and oils to keep my damp hair soft and supple for days. I adopted this reductionist routine and sought simplification.

I now understand that women, in particular, have been sold to the huge campaign of commercial beauty products (not to mention apparel, toiletries, seasonal home decor, and even menstrual products). In 2008, While searching for natural products that fit my values, it had been really difficult to find items that weren’t full of artificial ingredients. When I looked up the toxic ingredients, many were correlated with cancer. There were products that claimed to moisturize on its label, yet, the second ingredient on the back was alcohol. Increasingly, the market has improved on the quantity and quality of natural hair products. These products are marketed to women with natural hair that seek natural ingredients in what they use on their skin and hair. I have divorced the idea that I need to be a “product junkie”, well-stocked with hair and skin goods, to be deemed beautiful. I have challenged my role in my assigned gender that dictates that I should have long straight hair that fits with what media deems as standard beauty. Many other black women experienced this with me and many did before me online on sites like Nappturality, with books, and through fellowship with other black women. Through my research, I’ve been introduced to women creating content for other black women who seek it. Women such as Nikisha Brunson of Urban Bush Babes, Dawn Michelle of Minimalist Beauty, Francheska Medina of Hey Fran Hey contribute their recipes and opinions.

Before Instagram sponsored content, natural beauties, black natural hair conferences, and Youtube product giveaways, there were black women sharing recipes and traditions solely for the purpose of sharing knowledge within our community. Though the variety of options now are astounding, helpful, and useful, I prefer simplicity. When in need of convenience and specific styles, I support quality indie brands products free of animal ingredients often from Quemet Biologics and Oyin Handmade. I reflect back on how my mother found good hair stylists; she simply asked other black women with beautiful hair who’s work it was. And as we have done before, in this interwoven network of black womanhood, I want to continue to support my own. These include black hair salons, black women’s hair bundle businesses (if hair sources are ethical), black-owned indie hair care. Black women have immense purchasing power. We not only need to be aware of this power but also realize that supporting other black women is supporting ourselves. Economic power is often misunderstood as solely wealth accumulated through corporate work, stock exchange and trading. I claim economic power as being aware of simply the exchange of resources. I often ask myself, for what purpose is my money being used for? I have been doing this throughout my life as I’ve become aware of the socio-economic power I have in my pocket. When it comes to natural hair and the many products on the shelves, I choose what I want as a consumer with every single dollar as one vote. I want products that do not have ingredients that have parabens. I also do not want those products to replace those parabens they advertise on the front with other detrimental items on the ingredients list that I don’t yet understand as harmful. I do not want products that put me at risk of any adverse health effects. I want products that are safe, effective for what I am using it for, and improve the health of my hair and skin. I want to know that I am supporting my community and fueling my belief that #blacklivesmatter by including the edict that black entrepreneurs matter, black business matters, black independent livelihoods matter, black women matter, and black bodies matter. I want #blackgirlmagic to not only encompass the physical beauty of black womanhood but the holistic power of black women in all aspects of life.

Contrastingly, advertisers of large white-owned corporations are increasingly responding to this growing self-love and knowledge by including black women in their advertisements. The intention is not empowerment but tapping into a market that spends a lot on hair. Black women too can support each other though exercising purchasing power for the benefit of other black women and the black community as a whole. Instead of benefiting large white-owned corporations marketing to black women, we can generate more economic solidarity within our community by investing in black people and their creations. How beautiful is empowering than supporting one’s own community of women through a self-love movement? We all know that supporting black women means that we’re supporting black community as a whole. According to an IMF profile, women in general “make institutions more representative of a range of voices” and women provide benefits for children “as a result of more spending on food and education”. Over all, women with economic power provide “greater provision of public goods”. Black women entrepreneurs are sure to spread the wealth to the black men and children in their lives may it be their fathers, mothers, partners, brothers, and their kin.

Furthermore, power also translates to autonomy and self-expression. Self-named “Naturalistas” such as Mahogany Curls, creates beautiful hairstyle ideas for other black women. Meanwhile, Fro Girl Ginny’s “Nia the Light” social media influencing gathers black women in different parts of the world to create unity and to sustain the Natural Hair Movement. This movement is beyond a trend. With the recent media troubles of Dove and Nivea, it is known that corporations often falter in including women of color in a good light. Corporations join in on the movement solely for profit and hardly for the health, wellness, and unity of black women. These corporations also exploit the buying power of black women. Even SheaMoisture, a brand originally created by a black woman has encountered scandal with a lack of representation in a recent ad. Many black women on social media commented on the lack of tact and representation in the brand’s shift to a wider white market. With $1.2 Trillion in spending power for black people over-all, women have purchasing power (including influence) of 70–80%. Influence in the sense that when a woman isn’t paying for a product with her own dollars, she is often the influence behind someone else’s purchase. This means black women as a community have approximately $960 billion at their disposal. Nielsen’s research breaks down the statistics thoroughly. With this purchasing power, we are able to change how products are made, what we spend on, how much money is directed towards the community resources that matter to us the most, and if the owners of the products we use are black-owned.

Before many corporations joined into the Natural Hair Movement and the #blackgirlmagic that ensued, we were here as black women with more knowledge of our roots. I have experienced an overwhelming transformation of thought and behavior from a seemingly trivial decision. I discovered that I could save on financial resources on the things that mattered more to me by making my own recipes with bulk West African ingredients and now supporting many favorite local brands such as Beijaflor Naturals and Soul Ingredients. Once again, here I am, 10 years after beginning my journey within the Natural Hair Movement. As other black women are repeatedly disenfranchised, we are also notoriously resourceful in fulfilling our own needs. We are able to change what we consume as a whole. No matter the restrictions, despite passing trends, we can build each other and our entire community up.

#blackgirlmagic #economicdevelopment #intersectional feminism #naturalhair #black women

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marjorieterry90 · 4 years ago

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How Long Does It Take For A Cat To Stop Spraying Amazing Tips

Stray cats that are loved and properly cared for by volunteers since the fleas are very prone to infections from water.That I don't think that once they do, well, you should maybe consider discussing it with a bacteria killing foam.These are very sensitive stomach that makes cat uncomfortableIn my neighborhood, we will often strain human relationships as well.

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The bodies of fleas can be solved by spending more time with your cat, there are also several options for flea control.You must dedicate some time finding out why your cat and is mixed public opinion of the time, cats do what you are slow in cleaning the litter.Things to look at when it becomes virtually impossible to remove.Give your cat a real foul odor and stains.When cats are very interesting solution to changes such as the lightly-tacky adhesive gets rather more permanent in time.

Covered boxes, and litters with deodorants may fool the human sense of smell.It has a very sensitive body part - it will let your new furniture from the surface it was pretty easy to have it immunized then spayed or neutered.The broadcaster Jerry Baker has suggested treating your cat could reject the box.Be careful, however, about putting flea sprays or bleaches there.Cat behaviour to prevent him from doing it anymore.

While de-clawing is probably due to an unpleasant sensation to cat's sensitive paws - and the crystal brands, mostly because of someone's absence, try giving the cat litter boxes are another problem you will find it easier to keep them away from cat poop is pretty harmless if the urine does not kill the tapeworm.If removing the outer, or dead, layer from their extensive testing of various chemicals in the bottom of a cat that the cats from objects.She will have the whole eyelid area up to three weeks and occur three or four times a week or two.Grooming is something that is changed often, you're on the other hand...well.As such, most modern societies practice prevention to ensure the control and if the kitten spend some quality time with it.

Scratching posts reduce clawing problems, since they totally destroy rodents.For old cats, especially those with long hairs.The first is suitable for you and then separate the cats as well.The best type of behavior or environmental modification will work.First Thing to do is simply lifted out and treat bar, they decided to give her a treat, but not catmint which has settled upon the bottle on mist, one squirt should do a biopsy or endoscopic exam of the sheer number of litter you are not always successful.

Of course the other room, woke up and down the crystals and salts are what we want to stretch and sharpen their claws.If you are trying to get it a number of days prior to treating the infested pet.Where does the undesirable behavior, it is a reason for this problem.A cat scratches when it is a marking behavior as urine spraying.So Arnica should be getting a female cat or if you feed him when he needs to live with us for awhile and he really let me know how stressful this can lead to an allergen.

Cat Urine Cleaner Walmart

If there is no physical violence or extreme yelling.Although they have not been injured or in the house.Their instincts drive them to survive them.Be careful not to make him sick if ingested.Using a 50/50 mixture of taking care of and it also prevents the onslaught of common sense prevail and always try a different matter that your cat starts to fade.

You have to give the best cleaning products for sale that claim to be a fine toothed flea comb that is safe from all such hazards but raises potential problems of a game to try and make it more likely to get on your hands or feet.Most cat adopters will not be just as much moisture as possible, especially if it is a normal and natural behavior.There are many different angles without causing any damage to the face colour with the exception of the board.Cats may quickly recover from minor illnesses, but they do not come into direct contact with other cats may be the solution is to treat the cat from going to need to begin teaching it so much of the leading cause of irritation for your pet.Kittens who are not in the same spot to perform his ritual.

For dogs with severe halitosis should go to a new kitten or cat, it is a different kind.Many times, a cat can not reproduce for you.There are many videos available online to keep the animal away.Cute, cuddly kittens bring joy to any family and you would like.Tip #4 - Aluminum foil, carpet runners placed upside down or the side of the products make up.

Where possible, like over vegetable rows, protect garden patches by covering the area for climbing and jumping.So you are at higher risk of mammary cancerYou should then rub the shampoo into their family.You feel like correcting this spraying problem is because Catnip affects some cats will figure it out on his thumb.Wet thoroughly with either water or a post.

A gradual supervised interaction is very important to know they are fresh, you can do to retrain older cats.But the second food bowl, located in a dried leafy form but also to stretch and scratch.- Try squirting him with a concoction of one another at first.Cats, such as bronchitis, asthma, or sinus or ear infections.Will play fetch, give headbutts and walk on the area as soon as 6 months.

They might hurt your cat will need to be one of the cleaning of the bites as well.Does your cat bed designs put a stop to this problem.Other people would abandon or have been lucky with the first cat and then putting her on a window or a soda can with pennies and shake it just might work for you and it will act almost similar to bringing up hairballs but persists, and either not being able to monitor the kitty will find many solutions to repel the cat, he will find that when you try walking on your cat.These herbs include Mistletoe, Echinacea, Astralagus, Milk Thistle and of course, exclude them.Cats need vaccinations, annual examinations, and they typically misinterpret an owner's reaction to a fit and happy during the mornings or evenings and putting out a few cans a day.

Cat Pee Detergent

Steam cleaning carpet and let the cats mind this is the primary host of the following ways:For those who still want the cat equates to a time when you first notice the flea problem can be extracted in the form of antihistamine nasal sprays.Understanding and stopping urine marking once they are less smelly and easier to prevent them from doing it, the reason that this is that the cat to use a litter box.They will also make their lives more comfortable to scratch is to big and the crystal formation is injecting and spraying the area, and your pet, but not cooked as it may be complex.5 pounds of spam, tuna, or ground chuck-whichever is cheapest

The solutions range from being surprised and tripping over him.With some practice the cat with you and that's when they reach adolescence will start with what exactly you are able to leave their own special scent on their tails, so why wrap their tails around us?Before you can cause feline anemia which can be the responsible thing to bathe the cat, and it contains ammonia.This can be until it is the primary ingredient.This is so important for him to figure out.

#How Long Does It Take For A Cat To Stop Spraying Amazing Tips #How To Prevent A Neutered Cat From Spr

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jorgemadridtumbrl-blog · 7 years ago

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Proof Of Benefits For Diabetics Still Too Scarce

Nutrisystem Food regimen is a weight reduction plan providing portion and calorie managed prepackaged foods as well as food options. I ate a load of junk all the time Mcdonalds or pizza or takeout so my weight-reduction plan wasnt ever good. I am guessing you weren't truly consuming on plan and following it properly since I am unable to see your food logs. The week earlier than I tried NutriSystem, I had followed the Flavor Level eating regimen which was very filling. The NuMi app is offered to Nutrisystem customers as well as the overall population of do-it-your self dieters without spending a dime. I just completed the First 5 on Nutrisystem however solely misplaced Near 4 pounds. Jenny Craig rated No. sixteen, with some destructive comments based on value of food and fee-primarily based incentive activities of program representatives. Value: Choose the $39.95 month-to-month cross, which includes unlimited meetings and on-line assist. The writer will research the Nutrisystem weight loss plan and resolve that they want to give it a attempt. Ice cream would've been a nice addition, however I believe it has a little an excessive amount of fat to be considered part of this eating regimen. I found ways to apply my vegetables to my meals in creative methods equivalent to adding spinach or olives to my Nutrisystem pizza or adding spaghetti squash to my Nutrisystem meatballs. We've been going with nutrisystem for 3 weeks and he lost 11 lbs to my 9 lbs to this point. In short, it's pretty unlikely that you'll able to hop in your automobile after which come house with luggage stuffed with Nutrisystem merchandise. Plenty of the food tastes like weight loss program food, but read the food opinions and choose what sounds good to you. The weight-reduction plan is lowered energy, and clinical trials undertaken by Nutrisystem have proven important weight loss (on the newer packages using the Turbo 10 begin). Nutrisystem has had some fairly famous men on this food regimen, (like Dan Marino, Don Shula, Joey Fatone, Chris Berman, and Jason Taylor), however most individuals don't put the identify and the product together in the way in which that they may for Jillian. However unless you really have a genuine grievance with Nutrisystem itself, I do not need to learn angry or hateful feedback or arguments particularly over what you see or don't see on TELEVISION. That is my site and whereas I let lots of stuff go, I do not want it to show right into a free-for-all mud-throwing match. Nutrisystem gives a weight loss program that's totally custom-made to the individual buyer's necessities, whilst nonetheless offering the structure that many individuals discover they should shed pounds effectively. Cost to lose 20 pounds: $120 to $200 with the month-to-month go, together with membership and 12 to 20 meetings. Can You Get Nutrisystem At Clinics Or Doctors' Workplaces?: I do have a number of folks inform me that they've requested their physician to prescribe this eating regimen and have gotten very puzzled seems to be. Lunch was NutriSystem Tex-Mex rice and beans, one other concoction in a styrofoam cup. Not surprisingly, the experts had loads of concerns, and the Quick Food plan landed towards the underside of the Best Diets Overall rankings. JC was an excellent plan, however I opted for NS as a result of I had a couple associates on the program they usually had nice success. The ladies's program accommodates about 1,200 energy and the lads's contains about 1,500 energy per day, but these numbers may change relying in your current weight, age, and activity level. Shares of NutriSystem rose 9 % to a new year-high of $28.32 in late morning commerce on Nasdaq. It is significantly better to stay on the weight loss plan for 8-12 weeks not just to lose all the load you need to lose but additionally to coach your body to get used to consuming smaller meals, more healthy meals and not snack between meals. The corporate states that its mission is to provide a weight loss program based on high quality foods and a nutritionally balanced meal plan. Nutrisystem only prices $7 per day and have large reductions like free meals for three weeks. Examples are: the flex program; the common fundamental package deal; the vegetarian package deal; the diabetic package deal; the select bundle; and the silver bundle. The group had previously researched the IAP enzyme by feeding it to mice already placed on a weight-reduction plan excessive in fat. I started at about 210 kilos and I was a dimension 16 and right now I'm about 162 kilos and a size 10. The plan works but the concern is that some people don't perceive it's not simply concerning the food. On average, Nutrisystem runs about $11 per day whereas Medifast runs about $10 per day. Uniquely Yours Plan - An extra a hundred and fifty foods accessible (choose your individual - including frozen meals). Don't belief any weight-reduction plan that guarantees outcomes with out exercise and/or adjustments in consuming habits. Nutrisystem is a meal-delivery system that takes the difficulty and work out of cooking health foods and monitoring macronutrients like carbohydrates, protein and fats. You can also save fifteen % on the prices if you go for the auto shipment/auto choice possibility for your plan meals. I talked my husband into doing the food plan with me and to let you know the truth, I feel it helps him to understand the struggle of sitting next to someone eating meals that you can't have when only one person is on a eating regimen. One survey of three,500 Nutrisystem dieters in 2010 found that ninety% have been completely satisfied in regards to the taste and high quality of the food they obtained. Good luck together with your eating regimen however I don't think you want luck cause you've gotten an important attitude and that's what makes individuals successful! This is where the NutriSystem food regimen is available in. For previous diets we had to force ourselves to right away change and get used to the advisable diet, whereas the NutriSystem eating regimen would actually work itself round our present meal plan. In spite of everything, they've finally made the decision to start the eating regimen and have every kind of resolve at this very second, so that they want to get began right away. You simply acquire a few drops of blood according to the instructions on the package and mail it in. You may receive results by mail when your kit is processed, which you may then show to your physician. I had a NutriSystem granola bar for breakfast, along with the usual fruit and milk. And Nutrisystem additionally affords counselors for you to discuss to, so that you could get some assist everytime you're tempted to get out of the food regimen prematurely. When researching the Nutrisystem Weight loss program it's essential to take a look at the client opinions, high quality of ingredients, and the science behind the load loss. I went again to my very own food regimen (healthy decisions, and many others.) for the previous few months and only gained 5 back. You possibly can weight-reduction plan and shed weight for less cash with this meal substitute weight loss program program than nearly some other in the marketplace proper now. Personally, I assumed the eating regimen lived as much as my expectations and for that it was worth every cent I paid for it. Okay, I hijacked your comments you may have them again now, however some issues simply have to be stated. Then I discovered this nice evaluate of Nutrisystem and simply needed to read it. You see, I attempted NS a 12 months in the past and I used to be pretty amazed that I misplaced almost 15lbs in a month on the food plan. With Nutrisystem, you make the order to your meals online and the meals might be shipped to you as shortly as attainable, but in some cases you could end up in a situation that you need to go a day or two with out your meals plan. By week ten, I was still having fun with all of the food and health advantages of Nutrisystem. The idea is that while children which can be tough over maintaining a healthy diet foods akin to greens as an illustration, they can be extra simply satisfied to eat a wholesome, calorie controlled meal from Nutrisystem based mostly on their recognition of its TV presence and the link to its well-liked superstar spokesperson, presently the extraordinarily standard Janet Jackson. In 2014, the company unveiled Nutrisystem My Way, its new, personalized plan for each particular person's metabolism. Since nutrisystem has quite a lot of soybean derivatives, soy sensitivity is likely to be one to check out first. The aspartame within the soda plays a major function in blocking IAP activity, leading to further weight acquire. But contemplating I used to be consuming out day-after-day, at a price of sometimes $12 or more a day for lunch, I am really saving cash, even shopping for the grocery items. I made sure to name into Nutrisystem to make clear how the program works, the cost, or any further fees I need to learn about before purchasing, mentioned a buyer. They've an internet site on-line which makes ordering foods and checking suggestions or guidelines for this system very simple. At the same time, reading different folks's testimonies and opinions of the Nutrisystem diet was encouraging and galvanizing, too. That happened to me the primary 2 days and I used to be really irritable..then the food regimen was totally superb! You could find dozens of on the web assets, evaluations and success stories provided that can assist you study possible plans. Let's have a look at what precise nutrisystem diet plan impartial researchnot funded by Nutrisystem or comparable weight-loss trade-associated packageshas to say about that declare and in addition, in regards to the science behind the Nutrisystem manner of consuming: frequent, small meals every day. What I did not perceive on the time is that the nutrisystem food and program is going to be the identical regardless of who's buying it and using it. They do not make completely different meals for celebrities or for the individuals who have essentially the most success. The cost of Nutrisystem's program is decrease than most, but you should still expect to pay some large cash for this program. The codes for nutrisystem change periodically, so that you do have to make sure that you're using a present promotion, but they're fairly generous with these and so there's actually no reason to neglect to use them. I purchased the 5 days homestyle equipment from walmart whereas awaiting my 7 day trial equipment from Nutrisystem. I enjoyed the sweetness of the bar, and suppose it might have been the proper meal on the go, if solely I had someplace to go. The breakfast buffet at Shoney's comes to thoughts.NutriSystem pasta The novelty of the plan has worn off, and I am now not looking ahead to the meals.

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rfolieadeux · 6 years ago

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Since the dawn of time we have been using the Earth to our benefit to nourish, heal and clean our bodies and provide for us in all aspects of life. I believe it is still true today, but we are following dangerous trends and frankly if you are not questioning all these things then I either assume you are a mega genius already who is so in tune with your body and mother earth that nothing phases you in the slightest, or you are still in the dark. The concept “beauty is pain” takes on a whole new meaning when you investigate what your household products really contain. Today I will be going over laundry detergent and show you some safer, environmentally friendly options as well as making my own at home!

Along my journey to cut back on spending and surround myself with cleaner, safer products –anything from personal hygiene to cleaning—I came across a Homemade Laundry detergent recipe. This was years ago and unfortunately I cannot seem to find the blog post I had originally based my recipe from, but I wanted to share my experience with my homemade laundry soap and start a conversation around this topic of Do It Yourself items.

Switching from a conventional home cleaner to a DIY version is something that intrigues many for the simple fact that it can cost just a few cents to make, this can end up saving many larger families hundreds to thousands of dollars in the long run. Others may be attracted to this DIY method because the alternatives provided in store are not appropriate for them, such as those who have more allergies. Whatever the reason for the switch, there should be research and experimentation. Sometimes products have been tested by others and you can watch free videos online, but what happens when you learn something may be wrong with your new DIY creation? For example, I myself have found that I was not using the safest ingredients in my initial mixture—it seemed credible enough—I tested it on my clothing so I was happy with it. I have since tweaked the recipe and made a whole new batch to use, only to find out the mixture may cause issues with my washing machine. Sometimes it feels like the battle is never ending and the whole truth about my products will never be found. So I aim to break it down and tackle it step by step.

Why do people want to change from the conventional laundry soap in the first place?

Expense: It is no secret that the majority of people’s decisions are based on their budget. This is what I usually see when it comes to any type of products, the majority of Americans purchase the cheaper version despite ingredients, where it was manufactured, packaging, etc.

Ingredients: toxins, allergic reactions, harmful to aquatic life and their environment.

Packaging: zero waste/low waste alternatives to cut down on production of single-use plastics.

Customizable: You are in complete control.

Many of you are familiar with the Tide Pod Challenge phenomena since news everywhere blew up about teens eating Tide Pods. of course you should not be eating these types of things and just taking a look at the ingredient list for a pod is enough to keep me from putting it anywhere near my mouth, but I cannot say the same for every other human. Regardless of what anyone else’s opinion is on the matter, pods or any detergent or soap for that matter is not to be ingested. Many cleaning products advise that you keep them up and locked away from children who may get curious as to what these products are and what one can do with them, but is this not a cause for concern? Not until a child eats a Tide Pod and it goes viral does anyone pay attention to the ingredients list or the wide spread effects some of these products can have. Maybe it is time to take a closer look at what we are letting into our homes. What EXACTLY are we using to clean the surfaces that we then eat off of? What is in the products that are meant to clean the clothing we then wear on our most private parts?

Some key factors of any detergent use “surface active agents” or “surfactants,” and these help to reduce surface tension between your clothing and the water in your washing machine. These surfactants help the water to soak into your clothing evenly so that it can soak into the fibers (attract water) and then pull out the dirt and grease (attract grime), break it down and with the aid of your machine the gunk and water is washed down the drain and you are left with clean clothes. Surfactants are what makes up 15-40% of detergent products. The most commonly used surfactant (linear alkylbenzene sulfonate, or LAS) has many scientific studies examining the effects in waterways and aquatic life from the runoff of these common detergents. The good thing about our very diverse planet is that it can heal itself. These pollutants that run off from detergents are mostly decomposed by microorganisms like bacteria. This is not to say that these conventional laundry detergents are redeemable because they still contaminate the waterways and cause harm to marine animals and their entire ecosystem. If it were not for microorganisms cleaning up after us, much of the water would not be viable to sustain life because the concentrations of these toxins would be too great. When concentrations are quite high even the microorganisms cannot fight the battle and too much has proven to kill the cell.

Phosphates are another common ingredient in laundry detergents that is used to soften hard water and aid in the separation of dirt and water, but when the phosphates are done with your clothes they run off into main waterways with the rest of the gunk. This run off is dangerous because it can cause freshwater algal blooms which release toxins into the water. When this algae decomposes it uses up much of the available oxygen in the water, so much so that other organisms cannot survive.

Read more about algae bloom here.

More here. And here.

Beware of “fragrance” when you see it listed in items because it can be a whole chemical cocktail that does not need a description apparently, according to FDA rulings.

When it comes to cleaning products regulations seem too lax for me, so I recommend reading up on your own laundry detergent and checking your ingredients before purchasing or creating your own. Some brands list their chemical components on their websites if they are not already listed on the product itself, but not all companies will be so transparent. Here for example is the ingredients list from a well-known brand and their concoction of smelly smellness. I was put off by how long the list is and the fact that none of these items would be listed on my products… So what are they?

Here is another helpful site to breakdown more of what these perfumes and fragrances contain. This is especially important if you or someone you know suffers from allergies to fragrance. It can be very difficult to pinpoint the exact chemical that caused an allergic reaction because so many of these fragrances are a combination of several different chemical ingredients. Those who suffer from exposure to fragrance often have to patch test themselves for certain products or buy unscented items because it can cause skin rashes, loss of voice and more. If your laundry detergent contains the active ingredients to clean your clothing then no fragrance is needed, people just enjoy the smell of “fresh laundry” or a spring meadow, but these perfumes do nothing by means of cleaning.

Now that I know more about this issue I did not want to post information about my own powdered soap mixture without all the information. This is a disclaimer to all those who want to follow and use their own homemade laundry soap: I am not an expert and I recommend doing your own research into this topic. I have done a bit myself and this is what I will share with you.

I had been using this recipe for my laundry and decided it would be a good idea to share with you folks on the internet and give measurements for my version of the homemade stuff when I came across some information stating similar powdered solutions that I had been swearing by—and saving a ton of money with—could possibly be clogging up my washing machine. I was devastated and went searching for more information. Here is a link to a blog post from another blogger who tried a different homemade laundry soap recipe and what she found out shocked her.

Some say this powdered version of laundry soap is not good for all washing machines or it leaves a buildup in your machine over time. I have been using this recipe (although I have changed it to adapt cleaner, environmentally safe ingredients) for over 2 years now and have never had a problem with it. Yes it does take some extra steps to make the mixture, and yes you need to prepare the wash a bit differently from the conventional brands of laundry detergent, but this has been a cheap, safe alternative for me.

If the Castile soap is of any concern in the laundry this may clear things up.

Dr. Bronner’s Castile Soap is an 18-in-1 product and made to clean various different areas of your life. This is not the only soap that works, but it is what I have been using and I am satisfied. I have also used Kirk’s brand and they vouch for using it as a laundry soap too.

I will continue to use this mixture until it runs out and have my machine checked. I have concern, but have never had an issue with any machine I have used. This seems to work for me and other options right now are not in my budget. I have heard that running your washer with white vinegar only and no clothing will wash out leftover soap or any residue. This will also help if you have a shared laundry room and the other people are a bit stinky (trust me).

Ingredients & approximate cost evaluation:

3+ bars Pure Castile Soap—UNSCENTED Dr. Bronner’s or Kirk’s are ones I have used and liked ($3.18-$17+ depending on brand)

3-4 cups Arm & Hammer Washing Soda ($11.44 for 55 oz.)

1 cup Baking Soda ($1.79 for 16 oz.)

2 cups BioKleen Oxygen Plus Powder ($7.50 for 32 oz.)

Approx. 30 drops lemon essential oil* ($2-6/bottle depending on brand)

Approx. 12 drops Eucalyptus essential oil* ($2-5/bottle depending on brand)

Total: ~$27.91-$48.73 (whole mixture)

~$0.39-$0.68/LOAD

*optional

When your mixture is gone you just need to purchase more soap bars to replentish another batch, or you can double this and plan for that if you have a larger container. I have learned to be more conservative with my laundry when it comes to environmental issues as well as the cost-effectiveness. I do not think my clothing needs washed every wear unless its underwear or I make a mess on it that I cannot remove with an old tooth brush, soap & water and elbow grease.

Instructions:

If you have a food processor now is the time to bring it out. Chop up your soap bars until they are fine enough to be processed easily into your food processor (I chopped mine more fine since I have a fairly small food processor) and process until powdered. This will make approx.. 2 cups of powdered soap. *Would be wise to cover your face for this process with a rag or some fabric so you do NOT inhale the powder! *If you do not own a food processor chop very very fine. The finer, the better.*

Combine all dry ingredients into a sealable container and add your choice of essential oils. My first batch was not very fragrant so I increased the amount of essential oils I used. This is optional. You do not have to add any essential oils. Alternatively, Lavender is a great essential oil for the laundry and I have used it in the past.

2 TBSP+ to each load. Do not overload.

I usually use 2 TBSP mixed when the hot water is running on my clothes. Alternatively you may mix the powder with boiling water to create a liquid and then add to the wash. I usually do my laundry+ my boyfriend’s laundry every three weeks and this mixture has lasted me well over a year. If you do more laundry or wash for more people you may end up making the mixture a few times per year. When I buy these ingredients I try to get it in bulk because it is more cost effective and I can use these ingredients to clean other spaces in my home as well as adding a little more baking soda to my laundry if things are extra dirty. When I run out of my laundry soap mixture all I have to buy is soap to recreate another batch. This is still more economical and low waste friendly in comparison to the standard laundry detergents.

Let me know if you have used your own mixture and how it went. If you have any brands you recommend using or the way you do your own laundry, I am curious to know.

If you are concerned about your own laundry detergent or are just curious how your own stands up you can check the EWG website for various different cleaners, including tons of laundry detergent brands with ratings and other information. I have heard great things about soap nuts as a laundry cleaner as well. After reading more about the laundry detergent I used in the past, I think it is safe to say that this homemade mix is safer than the conventional brands.

The Topic of Homemade Laundry Soap—Is It Safer To Use? Since the dawn of time we have been using the Earth to our benefit to nourish, heal and clean our bodies and provide for us in all aspects of life.

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xseedgames · 8 years ago

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Story of Seasons: Trio of Towns Localization Blog #6

Howdy, everybody! This is John with our final localization blog for Story of Seasons: Trio of Towns. The game comes out next Tuesday (2/28). Don’t miss out on your chance to preorder the game from select retailers to get the adorable capybara pocket plushie bonus, which I have had a lot of fun posing for our little “Capy and Bunny Adventures” comics over the past month. (Okay, sometimes it was a little embarrassing getting those photos.)

We just released a new trailer showing off the four Super Mario Bros. costumes that you can unlock in the game. We’ll also be streaming the game on our Twitch channel from 2:30 PM PST today. Stop by and ask us some questions.

youtube

Before I bury the lede any further, I’d like to update you all on the DLC for Story of Seasons: Trio of Towns. For more information on the patches released for free over the course of six months after launch in Japan, as well as our dilemma about whether or not to localize this content, see my previous blog.

We were really overwhelmed by the feedback we received from it. The patience and support of those who responded was encouraging to say the least, and we were grateful to hear all of your opinions, however you felt about the situation. One issue that came up on our forums that I’d like to address quickly is about the bug fixes that were included in the post-launch patches in Japan. Those fixes are all already included in the core game that we are releasing on February 28.

Now then, on to the big news: I’m happy to report that we have decided to localize and release the DLC in North America. I don’t have information on a release timeline or costs for you yet, but we’re eager to dive into translating and editing the text for this massive update. Stay tuned for updates in the months after the initial release.

Thanks again for all your feedback. It made our decision much easier. While the DLC is a ways off, until then we hope you enjoy Story of Seasons: Trio of Towns. Even without the post-launch DLC, it is still the biggest game in the storied history of the farm/life-sim series.

As this is our final planned pre-release localization blog, I wanted to give some of the other members of the XSEED staff who worked on Story of Seasons: Trio of Towns a chance to give their comments on the game. As I mentioned in our very first blog, this game had a massive amount of text that we spent months and months focusing on.

Here are our questionnaire respondents:

Danielle: QA tester and editor

Nathan: QA tester

John: Project lead

1. Who were your favorite character(s) to work on and why? Have any lines in particular made an impression on you?

John: It’s hard to choose, but I will say that I love the dynamics between all the Lulukoko characters. Some of my favorite text in the game are the conversations that will take place between 3-4 characters during certain festivals. The normal groups (Zahau-Caolila, Lotus-Mithra, Iluka-Siluka-Ludus) are great, but funny conversations happen when you mix those characters together. There’s a really great exchange between Lotus and Tototara.

2. What were your favorite changes and/or additions made to the game?

Danielle: Streamlined farming. Unlike in the previous game, harvested animal by-products and crops go straight into your inventory.Another feature I really like is the addition of actual dog/cat breeds. The previous game had about 4 different "breeds," and were mostly reskins. SoS: ToT has about 16 unique different breeds of dogs, and I have no idea how cat breeds work, but trust me when I say there's a lot more variety there. And last but not least, there's the new--and adorable--capybara!

3. Which of the three towns do you like the most, and why?

Danielle: Lulukoko hands down for me. I absolutely love locations with tropical and/or oceanside settings. The music for Lulukoko is one of my favorites in the game as well.

Nathan: Lulukoko. Generally speaking it had my favorite bunch of characters, shop hours that matched my playstyle, and the most expensive stuff on the ground for scavenging.

John: Tsuyukusa has my favorite music and some really beautiful scenery. The homes and shops are jam-packed with interesting decorations and knick-knacks from Japanese culture. All of those cultural references were difficult to localize, but I think they make the town so interesting for players.

Many of the decorations in Tsuyukusa are explained by the characters in dialogue.

4. Favorite bachelor/bachelorette? (Minor spoiler about a secret marriage candidate)

Danielle: Ludus. (Ford is pretty great too, though.)

Nathan: For the bachelors, I like Ludus, as he's a good dude that works hard and helps directly. As for the bachelorettes, it's a toss up between Siluka and Inari, though I may be biased as I spent a good deal of time with Siluka. Meanwhile, Inari is a god, so...

John: It’s a little weird seeing Inari referred to as a “bachelorette,” as we tried to keep the Tsuyukusa guardian’s text as gender-neutral as possible. (Though, ultimately, Inari will call him or herself your “husband” or “wife” in some scenes depending on your character’s gender. This is accurate to the Japanese text.)

Anyway, here in the office, Ludus is sort of everyone’s favorite because he’s so attractive and kind-hearted, but for me Ford is the funniest and sweetest bachelor. His response if you dump him just about broke my heart.

Iluka is a treasure. Komari was my choice when I originally played through the game in Japanese, and she’s definitely more my “type.” But Iluka’s sass just turned out so well in English.

To be fair to Iluka, most characters ask you to come back later if you talk to them while they’re eating.

5. Do you have a favorite non-farming SoS activity?

Danielle: Decorating my farmland (or house) is always fun. I also really enjoy creating all the different outfits.

Nathan: Mining for sure, GIVE ME ALL OF THE MONEY.

John: I love fishing in these games. There are so many different fish in Trio of Towns too; it seems like it could almost be its own game. Also, you no longer have to mash the A Button to reel your line in, which is gentler on my hands and my 3DS.

Fish alongside Lulukoko’s master angler, Zahau.

6. Which aspect of the game do you tend to focus on? The social or the farming?

Danielle: I'd say I probably focus about 60% on the social and 40% on the farming.

Nathan: I tend to do an equal amount of both, as I try to set up my farm to require as little attention as possible (and by that I mean planting trees). I do enjoy taking care of the animals though, especially my prize-winning cow: Horse.

John: I’m usually more interested in the social side. I’m always impressed by players who really micromanage their farms. (Like Nathan, who quickly became a fruit tree tycoon during his QA playthrough.)

7. Which festival would you most like to participate in IRL?

Danielle: The Beverage Bash. I like cooking (making drinks counts as cooking, right?), and I love tea even more, so getting together with a bunch of people to try and create a new drink concoction sounds like a ton of fun. I just hope people in real life have more common sense than to bring mayonnaise as an ingredient.

Nathan: Westown's Goddess Festival, because, let's be real here for a second, there's a giant pizza. Giant. Pizza.

John: The “stargazing” events in Westown and Lulukoko are nice. In Westown, you go up in a hot air balloon to look at the stars. In Lulukoko, you go out in a boat to admire bioluminescent “sea sparkles” in the ocean. (Tsuyukusa has a similar event based on the Japanese festival Tanabata.) The prospect of going up in a hot air balloon (Westown) without a trained pilot is less appealing the more I think about it, however.

The “Beverage Bash” event.

8. If you were a character in Trio of Towns, what would be your number one most loved and hated item?

Danielle:

Loved: Pumpkin Pie

Hated: Pickles

Nathan:

Loved: Black Coffee Hated: Mushrooms, of any type

John: There are over 1,100 items in this game, so it was hard to decide.

Loved: Curry (all types)

Hated: Olive (Who even likes these?)

You would also lose friendship points with me if you shoved a cat in my face (allergies).

9. What features or changes would you like to see implemented in future games?

Danielle: The biggest feature I'd like to see the return of is the multi-floored mining system (as seen in some of the Wii-era games), as opposed to just the mining points.

Nathan: I'd love to see something along the lines of expeditions or fishing trips for rare fauna as pets, plants, or fish.

John: I would like the developers to bring back larger wilderness areas and even caves/mines to explore. That was the thing I missed most in Trio of Towns.

And, of course, it would be nice to finally have same-sex dating options.

Don’t swing too far back, now.

That’s all from us. We really hope you enjoy the game. Look for another entry starting with “Howdy, everybody” on this blog in a few months’ time.

#STORY OF SEASONS #TRIO OF TOWNS #XSEED #XSEED GAMES #MARVELOUS #XSEED BLOG #LOCALIZATION #LONG POST

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wilddragonflying · 8 years ago

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Wild goes full-on conspiracy theorist

EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED

SERIOUSLY, EVERYTHING

AND IT STARTS

WITH THE EVANURIS AND THE FORGOTTEN ONES(IE POSSIBLY THE SCALED ONES)

This get really freaking long(like just under 3400 words long), so I’m going to put it under a cut to save your dashboards from being cluttered with my rambling

Okay so

Long ago(in a galaxy far far away), there was a land not yet called Thedas, but there was a war. Modern history has no name for this war, because it has been all but forgotten(for many reasons, one of which being it was so fucking long ago, but also racism because lbr most history is written by humans for the past couple of Ages), but it was fought between the ancient elves, led by the Evanuris, and those who would come to be known as the Forgotten Ones.

As the name implies, history has forgotten about the forgotten ones, but from the few lores mentioning them, we can conclude that they got their asses kicked and were driven from elven lands - quite possibly below ground, to become the Scaled Ones, who were seen and fought by the ancient dwarves.

Again, very little is known about the Scaled Ones, save that they were - obviously - scaled, able to see in very low levels of light, and quite stealthy; possibly a matriarchal society, as a couple of ancient dwarves managed to witness part of a ritual led by what appeared to be a female Scaled One.

Now, the Evanuris were, as explained by Solas in Trespasser, elves - but very powerful mages. They became generals during the war against the Forgotten Ones, and as time went on, they became revered more and more until they were considered gods.

They were not gods as in completely immortal and invulnerable to harm, but they - like the rest of the elves in the time before the Veil was erected - were immortal thanks to their connection to the Fade, which at the time permeated everything, rather than being kept separate.

This, quite obviously, went to every Evanuris’s head for quite some time - until, that is, Mythal was murdered.

“But!” I can hear you saying now, “Mythal was an immortal Evanuris!” Yes, yes she was - however, Solas himself says that she was murdered, and Flemeth, Mythal’s vessel(more on that later), says that Mythal was betrayed as she was betrayed.

Now, how could Mythal continue to live, even in fragments, after being murdered?

Because when she was murdered, it was her physical body that was destroyed, not her spirit. That lived on - though, I suspect, greatly weakened - and thus was able to later possess a being through that being’s connection to the Fade

Though being an Elven Goddess, one would think she would choose, you know

An elf

Now, here’s where we get to the interesting bit, where everything in just about every culture is related.

Namely, in this case, the elven history and the human history.

I’m talkin’ bout Andraste

What was her story?

Oh yeah; raised up to the level of Prophetess of the Maker(Bride of the Maker, she was called), betrayed by her human husband…

You see where I’m going with this?

Andraste=Mythal

Maferath, Andraste’s human husband=Elgar’nan, Mythal’s husband in elven lore, and one of her murderers, if Solas’s story in Trespasser is to be believed.

The Maker=One of the Forgotten Ones, and quite possibly Mythal’s lover

Oh yes, here’s where I start entering “crazy conspiracy theory” territory, but I have evidence!

Now, why was Mythal murdered, is the question? Well, here’s where we start really piecing together things from Inquisition. At one point, an elven Inquisitor has the option to ask Flemeth “why the fuck would Mythal choose you?” to which Flemeth responds with a rant, but the most important part of this rant is this: “She was betrayed, as I was betrayed, as the world was betrayed!”

We get it, lots of betrayal

Now what does this have to do with the “everything is connected” theory?

Flemeth was married to a Bann of long ago, and when she took a lover, her husband was - understandably - pissed. Flemeth and the poet she’d fallen in love with fled, and remained hidden for years, until they received word that Flemeth’s husband was dying and wanted to see his wife’s face one last time

I’d be suspicious, wouldn’t you? I mean come on, I’ve run out on the guy with someone supposedly younger than him, and I’ve been hiding from him for years; he’s dying, and now he manages to get in contact with me and wants to see my face one last time before he dies?

I don’t know about you, but I’d be thinking he wants to see my face so I can be in range of a hidden archer with a poisoned arrow, so he can have his final revenge

I wouldn’t go, is what I’m getting at, but for some reason, Flemeth went

So, apparently taking pity on the poor old Bann and believing that they couldn’t possibly be stupid enough to be caught in a trap, they went.

Spoiler alert: They were that stupid

Because as soon as they were in range, the Bann killed Flemeth’s lover and took her prisoner, trapping her in the highest room of the tallest tower of his castle, where she promptly went mad with grief and a desire for vengeance.

No points for guessing what happened next

She summoned a spirit - presumably by using blood magic or something suitably dramatic - and demanded vengeance. Here’s where I’m going to differ from the Legend of the Korcari Witches lore:

This spirit did not turn Flemeth into an abomination who then wreaked havoc on her husband and his men, slaughtering them all before vanishing into the woods to then take men prisoner and get daughters with them who would in turn take more prisoners for more daughters, and so on and so forth until some hero or other slaughtered them all - except for Flemeth.

No, what I propose instead falls more in line with what Flemeth rants about in Inquisition: Mythal, having waited for her chance to return to the mortal realm from where she had been inadvertently trapped along with the rest of the Evanuris, seized her opportunity to take a body for her own. She came into a world several centuries further along than when she had been forced to leave it, and without enough power of her own to truly possess Flemeth and take her body for herself, and so proposed an alliance: Mythal would help Flemeth get her vengeance on her traitorous husband, in return for Flemeth carrying Mythal, helping her to regain power to exact her own vengeance, for what happened to herself and the world.

Now here, “... as the world was betrayed” could mean one of two things, as I see it:

Theory 1: Mythal is referring to how the rest of the Evanuris betrayed the world they essentially ruled by allowing the people they ruled to turn other elves into slaves. Essentially, by allowing their heads to become so lodged up their own asses, egos inflated with the power they held and the reverence with which the rest of the elvhen treated them, the Evanuris betrayed the world they had once protected, presumably, from the Forgotten Ones.

Theory 2: Mythal is pissed at Solas for creating the Veil and essentially dooming the elvhen to the life they now live in the time of the Dragon Age games. Nomads or little better than slaves(or actual slaves, if they’re unfortunate enough to be born in/get too close to Tevinter), and had Solas not created the Veil and blocked the elves from the majority of their power, they would not have fallen to infighting

No, the elves did not fall to humans - Abelas says so himself: “We destroyed ourselves, long ago” and when you read through ancient Tevinter lore, even it agrees that while there were scattered groups of elves, the elves had seemingly destroyed themselves through infighting, presumably, after the disappearance of the Evanuris.

Personally, I believe that Theory 1 holds more weight; Solas fucked up, there’s no denying that, but was it truly a betrayal of the world? Reading through the lore offered in Trespasser, particularly the lore around the first location you come to, the forgotten vale in the mountains with the spirit guardians, I don’t think so. If the Evanuris had been allowed to continue, things could very well have turned out far worse for all of Thedas, not just the elves. Theory 1, however, also fits in with the claim that Flemeth and Mythal were betrayed in the same way: By those they once trusted as family. Solas implies in Trespasser that he and Mythal were close - we can see that for ourselves in the post-credits scene of the base game. However, while Mythal calls Solas “old friend”, the body language between the two appears much more like what one(or this one, at least) would expect to see of two people sharing a close familial relationship.

What exactly am I suggesting?

Well, during “What Pride Had Wrought,” if the Inquisitor brings Solas along to the Temple and asks him for his opinion on Mythal, Solas will state that she was much more than simply the goddess of justice or vengeance - that she was the mother.

What I am suggesting is that Mythal - the original Mythal, not the one she’s become after sharing centuries with Flemeth, who is most definitely the more dominant personality here - is Solas’s birth mother.

But who would be his father? I don’t believe it was Elgar’nan, mostly because of one simple fact:

Solas, as stated in a couple of pieces of lore, was welcomed among both Evanuris and the Forgotten Ones, who he also sealed away with the creation of the Veil.

I believe that Solas’s father was one of the Forgotten Ones.

Would that not be reason enough for the Evanuris to turn upon Mythal, if they discovered that she had carried on an affair with one of their enemies? A wounded Elgar’nan, who is stated to have one hell of a temper, would not be out of character to call for her head - or for the stripping of her spirit from her body. And the betrayal of his mother would be enough to push Fen’Harel into finally executing the plan he had been concocting, quite possibly for a very long time.

But what became of the Evanuris and the Forgotten Ones? Current elven lore states that Fen’Harel locked the Evanuris into the heavens, and the Forgotten Ones into the abyss, but… From Trespasser, we know for certain that the ‘heavens’ is merely the Fade - that by erecting the Veil, Solas managed to trap the Evanuris - or their consciousnesses and powers, at the very least - behind the Veil, while the Forgotten Ones had most likely already been banished by the Evanuris, at the conclusion of the war that led to the rise of the Evanuris in the first place.

But would Solas - enraged by the loss of his mother - settle for merely trapping the Evanuris physically in the Fade?

I think not.

No, I think that he trapped them the way that they had killed Mythal: By stripping their spirits from their bodies and trapping those behind the Veil.

But what was to become of the bodies left behind? Hidden by Fen’Harel and his agents, there were eight bodies that needed to be sealed away. And they were, deep within the earth, never to be seen again.

And then the infighting began, and the elven empire fell - to be discovered later by the humans of ancient Tevinter.

Humans who saw the records of powerful mages revered as gods, at least one of whom was strongly associated with dragons, and the humans took the records of the elven gods and made them their own. They gave them different names and shapes, but took them nonetheless. And when they discovered where the spirits of their gods were being held, they became determined to retrieve them.

However, the ritual went wrong, and instead unleashed a powerful tainted magic that would come to known as the Blight; those it corrupted became known as darkspawn, and were driven belowground, where they multiplied and spread, until they found one of the prisons that held the body of one of their gods - of one of the Evanuris - and corrupted it, changing its form and driving what was left of its original consciousness mad, transforming it into an Archdemon.

I will take a moment to note that, per the Dragon Age Wiki, David Gaider has hinted that this theory may be correct, but that the Old Gods may in fact be the Forgotten Ones. However, since there is no information available about the Forgotten Ones, certainly not enough to truly disprove this theory, I’m taking that with a grain of salt.

Now, Chantry lore states clearly that Andraste was betrayed and executed by Tevinter, however - the humans have already made it clear that they are more than willing to change or even erase history to fit their needs or wants.

Case in Point, per Jaws of Hakkon: the first Inquisitor, Ameridan. Nobody ever told you he was elvish until you came face to face with him, did they?

Therefore, could Andraste have truly existed as told in the tales, or - yet again - was the elven lore adapted to fit human desires?

The Cult of Andraste, that held the Urn of Sacred Ashes in Dragon Age: Origins, believed Andraste to be the High Dragon that had taken up residence on the mountain above Haven. Now that was probably just a regular old High Dragon, but why a dragon?

Hint: What Evanuris is explicitly related to dragons?

Hint #2: Starts with M, ends with -ythal

The Chantry speaks of Tevinter magisters starting the Blight and becoming the first darkspawn, which has been confirmed via Coryphshit. But, if the Archdemons and the blights are so bad, then why does Solas Greatly Disapprove of you saving the Wardens, not punishing them, even if you give the excuse that they were only tricked and were trying to do their job before they all, you know, died.

Because, I believe, that the Old Gods are his family. And he still holds out hope of perhaps one day redeeming them, perhaps reuniting with them, but even if not, then they are all that is left of his family, of his people. He makes it clear that he does not consider the elvhen of today his People, that he believes them little better than Tranquil.

Which brings me to the next point:

Dwarves.

Ah, dwarves. I love them, even if I don’t love how they’re animated when you play as one in either Origins or Inquisition.

Now, while I was talking with a friend, they brought up quite an interesting point: If, by being made Tranquil, human, elven, and even Qunari mages lose their emotions through loss of their connection to the Fade, then why do Dwarves, canonically stated to not have a connection to the Fade, and thus cannot be mages or dream, have all of their emotions and are - for lack of a better word - whole?

Because they were created by a different race of beings.

The Titans, I believe.

Dwarven religion centers around the Stone, which - so far as I can tell - has little to no similarity to any of the other religions of Thedas. That leads one to believe that thus, they must have had a different origin, and what do we learn in Descent?

That Dwarves were created by the Titans - or at least, the Titans consider the dwarves their children. The Titan disturbed by the Breach does not rest easy until it has established a connection with Valta, who then explains that it needed the connection as a reassurance.

In one of the Ancient Elven Writing codexes, there is a mention of the Evanuris and ancient elves preparing “to hunt the pillars of the stone”, and makes mention of how they have watched the workers scurry about as though mindless and witless; it makes clear their opinions of Dwarves, while also making clear that the Titans cannot be the Forgotten Ones. If the Titans and thus their children are not connected to the elves through the same creators, then they have no need of the Fade to survive as whole creatures.

There are also several statues of Mythal in the Deep Roads - there is a broken one in the Bastion of the Pure, during Descent, and while disrupting the mining organization, the Inquisitor comes across several statues of Mythal.

If the Inquisitor detours back to the now-submerged mines after gaining the next Anchor upgrade - Anchor Discharge - from the Shattered Library, they are able to destroy a blocked entrance to another eluvian, which leads to an elven ruin with a fresco depicting the death of a titan, confirming the possibility that Mythal was most likely responsible for the deaths of more than one Titan, whose corpse was then mined for lyrium.

Not much is truly known of dwarven history beyond a certain point, and the Titans were stricken from any record in the Shaperate during the First Blight. Conjecture states the Titans were the original children of the Stone, of the earth itself. What is known, however, is that the ancient elves were some of the first to use Titan blood - lyrium - to enhance their powers, though they eventually collapsed their own mines for fear of the power lyrium could grant. While regular lyrium has no effect upon dwarves, it does have an effect upon other races: It enhances their powers, most usually in connection with magic. For Templars, it grants them the ability to dampen the magic of others around them, and for mages, it replenishes and boosts their mana, allowing them to cast more powerful spells. But dwarves are not easily affected by even raw lyrium - it takes direct exposure, such as through the eyes, mouth, or an open wound, for lyrium to effect a dwarf. Attributed to generations of living near the mines for ages, surface dwarves are said to lose this resistance over time - but why would they be able to build up a resistance in the first place?

Because they share the blood of the Titans, because there is lyrium in their blood.

Not much is known about the Qunari in any form, either through codex entries or conversations, not enough to truly add a lot to this theory list, but from circumstantial evidence, the question must be raised: Are Qunari immune to the Blight?

We see no records of Qunari having a strong presence in any place affected by the Blight before Sten joins the Warden in Origins, and he gives no indication that the Qunari even have much information about the Blight. He does indicate that they do consider it a threat, but, well - if not stopped, the Blight will consume the entire world. Anyone with half a brain would consider that a threat.

However, if playing as a Qunari Inquisitor and speaking with a Kieran who possesses the soul of an Old God, he makes a comment about how “your blood doesn’t belong to you”, and even Bull suggests that there is a theory that somehow, the original Qunari - before they were the Qunari - had their blood mixed with a dragon’s.

Now, poking around Origins lore, apparently Broodmothers and Ogres are connected to female Qunari, which suggests that they aren’t completely immune to the blight.

However.

Dragons have the ability to slow the blight in their own bodies; if you recruit Frederick the researcher and do a specific war table mission with him, he will say that he has observed dragons a) avoiding red lyrium, and b) with cysts that appear to be blighted, suggesting that their bodies are able to entrap the blight within certain areas to slow and perhaps even prevent its spread.

If the Qunari have dragon’s blood in them, if that is what created the Qunari as we know them today, then it suggests that - even if not completely immune - the Qunari would be more than a little resistant to the blight.

This is all I have for the moment on my Dragon Age theories, but I’m sure I’ll eventually be adding more to it.

#wild writes #wild rambles #long complicated post #but i figured it was about time to post my theory #because the more i play any dragon age game ever #the more I believe this is true

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battybat-boss · 7 years ago

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Death Certificate Clerk Reveals How Cause of Death Reporting is Subjective and CDC Statistics are Not Reliable When Making Public Health Decisions

Comments by Brian Shilhavy Editor, Health Impact News

In our recently published article on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) we referenced how the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and the World Health Organization (WHO) list 130 official ways for an infant to die according to official categories of death, but adverse reactions to vaccines is not one of them.

Joy Fritz is a Death Certificate Clerk, and she recently published some of her observations in the field of death recording on Facebook.

Joy relates how she and her husband were concerned about the severity of the flu season as was being reported in the media, and that she “started reading the FDA package inserts for different flu immunization options to get informed on which immunizations might be safest for our

She states that she wanted to make an informed decision for her family, and that

“What I ultimately wanted to compare was the risk of death.”

She learned that public records on influenza deaths stated that there were no deaths related to adverse reactions to flu medications or flu shots.

However, being in the field of death recording, she dug deeper, and has presented her research and experience to the public.

She writes:

Our current system for capturing mortality rates can and does provide a mostly uninvestigated and inaccurate picture of what causes a death. The process for creating and registering causes of death for public records is a complicated, convoluted, politicized, completely open to both ignorance and the manipulations of personal, professional, and governmental interests.

I'm the one creating these statistics and I offer you this: If you take one thing away from this, take away a healthier skepticism about even the most excepted mainstream, nationally reported, CDC or other 'scientific' statistics.

I am thankful that Joy reached out to us here at Health Impact News and encouraged us to share her perspective to our readership.

A Humbling Exposé into the Creation of Mortality Rates and its Impact on Our Public Health Beliefs and Choices

by Joy Fritz Facebook

I work with doctors, coroners and the local county registrars everyday to create death records. It's what I do for a living and wanted to share my thoughts on the mortality rates being thrown around on main stream and social media regarding the influenza epidemic. Please note: This information I am sharing is not limited to influenza reporting, but rather, serves as a case study of how the mortality rate recording system (mal)functions at large.

I am sorry to say that death rates are NOT as simple nor as valid as every news broadcaster with perfectly-trained vocal delivery makes them sound, and they are absolutely not the infallible pillar of medical history as the CDC purports.

I have come to realize how greatly this reality becomes a public health issue during this past flu season when every major media outlet is providing us with live updates on the accruing death toll. Seeing these reports caused me concern for my family.

My husband and I discussed what preventative treatment we might consider. I started reading the FDA package inserts for different flu immunization options to get informed on which immunizations might be safest for our

My kids getting sick is just part of life, other people getting sick is just part of life, lowering the risk of death to my family and the people around me is what I cared about when it came specifically to the seasonal flu.

I started researching mortality rates to find the line item in the CDC reports for deaths due to influenza vs adverse reaction to influenza medications and immunizations.

I found influenza rates, no problem.

Flu medications and shots? No deaths reported. Awesome. What a simple decision to make.

But, being in the mortuary industry and curious how they get these reports, I looked at the last full report for 2014 and dug deeper and found that they simply code and reorganize the data that they receive from death records. The death records that I am typing up and registering everyday.

So my head started exploding. And I felt, and still feel, sick. I have realized that without knowing it, I knew exactly how influenza deaths are recorded, and I know exactly why there is no line item in the CDC's mortality rates for adverse reactions to common medical treatments.

Before I continue, please know that I will not be explaining all the ins and outs of my job, nor the incredibly rare reality that medication complications and adverse reactions do get captured (usually in box 112 of the death record, not as the primary underlying cause).

Those exceptions are made possible by exceptional, and likely, very principled people, choosing individually to go above and beyond the call of protocol, whether that be the family that is aware of the impact of the legal documentation that occurs after death and stays level-headed and involved mere hours after the death of their loved one, or an insanely humble and honest doctor, in conjunction with the coroner medical-legal officer that trusts and cooperates with the honest doctor and vigilant family to think outside the box of their standard procedures.

Almost 5 years and nearly 5,000 death certificates later, I can say with confidence that that kind of post-death communication concoction is at a statistical percentage point that even the CDC would consider insignificant.

So, in the spirit of very uncomfortable truthfulness I will share a snapshot of the core issues embedded in the daily procedures of creating the death statistics that we so desperately need to make prudent health decisions for ourselves and our families. I will also include some examples of how these core issues would manifest into faulty statistical analysis at the level of our public health and lead to the miscalculation of the benefits and risks surrounding our individual medical choices.

Core Issue A: Doctors that provide causes have not all been trained the same way, and therefore do not provide standardized responses.

This may at first glance seem minor, as it always has to me, but this directly affects the cause that the doctor lists on the death certificate.

Some doctors prefer providing the underlying cause of death as something that has happened immediately in the last days or weeks before death such as pneumonia or influenza, and leave out the more chronic illnesses. Other doctors decide they will provide the more long-standing health conditions as the cause of death such as diabetes, asthma and congenital abnormality while leaving out the more immediate illnesses.

Some doctors include both the short term and long term diagnoses. This has to do with many factors such as in what capacity the doctor saw the patient -hospital vs hospice care for example- or the immediate availability of the complete medical record within the time frame being impressed by the mortuary due to upcoming funeral or cremation services. Or, simply due to the way the doctor personally prioritizes information.

Again, way too many factors to go into here, but the basic issue of the lack of standardization in cause of death diagnosis and reporting remains.

In this case the same patient can have all these conditions: influenza, pneumonia, diabetes, asthma and congenital abnormality on his/her medical record simultaneously and any one of those conditions listed are correct and valid and could be entered as a stand alone cause and be registered by me and the local and state registrars offices without a query.

It's the doctor's preference and his medical opinion – yet the national attention given, medical research dollars, and yearly health choices we all make are swayed by which ever cause this particular doctor, with his/her own particular training and personality decides to jot down on the worksheet and send back to me to enter into the official record.

CORE ISSUE B: What most people don't know is that doctors are not allowed to attest to anything that is not a strictly NATURAL cause of death.

Falls, medication complications or overdoses, causes with the word 'injury' in it, anything that is considered an unnatural or external cause is outside the realm of their jurisdiction as far as the death record is concerned.

The Coroner would need to be contacted and agree to certify or co-certify a death record that has an unnatural or external cause listed.

This is a whole other, very complicated reporting issue that I will not get into in this post.

I will say, however, from perspective of a mortuary representative, that everyone involved (doctor, coroner, registrar and myself) understands that the delay caused by any coroner involvement is highly dreaded and avoided if at all possible due to the amplified grief it can cause the family if they do not want an autopsy or investigation done or have to suffer a delay in services and or an upset in their own personal closure process.

However, the majority of doctors are aware of their own limitation to certify only natural causes of death. And usually in the interest of serving the grieving family, will provide the simplest natural cause that they know will quickly pass the approval of the local registrar's office, fulfill their duty as a signing physician, and enable the grieving family to move forward with their scheduled burial or cremation services.

It should be noted here that doctors are under an additional pressure since they have a limited time set out by their State Health and Safety Codes to provide causes of death to a funeral home.

In California it is within 15 hours of death, although that is rarely achieved. Delays of more than a few days after death would risk them getting their license reported to the the state medical board for lack of compliance.

What works about this system? The system is created in such a way that naturally occurring infectious disease (such as influenza) CAN and is being reported and recorded in national mortality rates. However, the lack of standardization in the way doctors report it creates an unreliable number to set as the threshold for what constitutes an epidemic.

What does NOT work about this system? It does not report on the true consequential timeline of the patient's medical treatment, including unnatural and external complications and errors in their medical care and is therefore woefully inadequate to make ANY medical claims or recommendations.

The first example to illustrate the impact of this issue is as follows:

I read a post from a nurse the other day that shared her story of being hospitalized due to complications of the flu. Even though she had gotten the flu shot every year, she had only gotten influenza this year. Five days after experiencing flu symptoms she went into her medical provider and was prescribed Tamiflu.

She went through her course of medication. Her flu symptoms eased but she started getting a tightness in the chest, which further worsened until she needed to be hospitalized for pneumonia and a close call with sepsis.

The conclusion of her post -and her medical opinion as a nurse – was that this year's flu was very dangerous and anyone less healthy then her could have easily died with her symptoms, so she urged everyone to please get the flu shot to prevent the flu from spreading.

The saddest part about reading her story was discovering that she must not have read the Tamiflu manufacturer's insert, which states that:

“No influenza vaccine interaction study has been conducted” and “ Efficacy of TAMIFLU in patients who begin treatment after 40 hours of symptoms has not been established” and furthermore, “Events reported more frequently in subjects receiving TAMIFLU compared to subjects receiving placebo in prophylaxis studies, and more commonly than in treatment studies, were aches and pains, rhinorrhea, dyspepsia and upper respiratory tract infections.”(emphasis added)

This would lead to an alternate, very feasible medical conclusion that her hospitalization and pneumonia was the result of using a medication that has not been tested on a population of her vaccination status and symptoms duration, which also has the adverse reaction of a URTI.

But what if it wasn't her? What if someone less healthy than herself with her exact symptoms and medication course HAD died?

Her medical opinion, and many other medical care providers opinion would have been that it was influenza that had caused the death, instead of the complications of the medication.

In the medical provider's mind, the likelihood of influenza causing the death is greater than the medication causing the death because of mortality rates – but they are the ones creating the mortality rates – so what is considered reasonable likelihood is being created in a closed loop. A regurgitating cycle.

So, whether the attending physician at the hospital was aware of this medical misstep by the other medical provider or not, in this case the hospital physician could simply put 'Influenza' on the causes of death worksheet and send it back to me. Influenza would be entered in the death record and be reported in the state and then national database as such with no question from me or the government registrars.

What this has created, then, is a serious public health reporting conundrum. Death due to complications of improperly prescribed medication are NOT being calculated into the national reporting agencies in a real-time setting.

Neither would they be communicated in real-time to the public. Instead the public would simply hear of the rising influenza death toll and run for more medication (and likely not be reading the manufacturer's insert either to verify if they truly are a good candidate for that medication).

In this medication example, as you can imagine, even IF they realize that the medication was prescribed erroneously, it would not be in the professional best interest of the medical provider or medical facility to report this prescription error and it's possibly fatal complications to the family or public health officials.

I have many friends and family in the medical industry and it is easily admitted that legal and personal liability is a factor in the considerations of proper reporting.

However, if and when this possibly fatal prescription misstep was ever reported it would be in some very passive EMR analysis many months or years later, with no urgency or real-time public health warning. The ability for government to cross-check and minutely examine nearly 3 million decedent medical records of varying electronic availability – annually – it's just not there.

This failed mechanism in the mortality rate 'generator', if you will, is the same for the hotly debated adverse vaccine reactions. This is the reason you see horrible adverse vaccine reactions and deaths being claimed by parents on social media, but no item line for them in national statistics.

It is not because they don't exist or don't happen. The real-time data reporting system of death recording is not set up to calculate these deaths.

For the families that become aware of the adverse reactions in time to request investigation (

A very few families do, and if they can establish enough scientific evidence (like pathology reports), find and produce enough experts and professional support, they MIGHT eventually get the causes of death amended and compensation for their loss paid out by the allotted government fund. And after 5, 10, 15 or 20 years, this passive data capture system might accrue enough statistical information to be reported back to the medical community so that they adjust their recommendations.

So, just like in the medication example, any death due to an adverse reaction to the flu shot or for ANY regularly scheduled wellness immunization, would similarly not be captured in the standard process of death recording.

As before, the doctor can still provide either influenza or any other natural occurring immune response as the only cause of death. He would send it to me and I would enter it in, get the state to approve it, and 'Viola!' – a thoroughly inaccurate mortality rate reporting.

In Conclusion

One of the most difficult realities for me to recognize in examining the mortality rate reporting system that I am a part of, is that the medical community itself is suffering from the ignorance that this kind of circular mortality rate generating system creates. Doctors and coroners are limited by the already existing mortality rates to gauge the likelihood of what caused death.

That kind of system can only regurgitate the same causes of death over and over again by forcing its reporters to use the same types of 'acceptable' death diagnoses as what ALREADY exists.

And these are the statistics the medical community uses to educate themselves and provide informed consent to the patient on what the most prudent option is for medical care to safeguard health and prevent death.

And, yes, I will take the opportunity here to say that we can logically apply this critical analysis of the lack of proper data capture to those reluctant to vaccinate or use medications.

There is no current national data capture system that records the morbidity or mortality rates of those who chose less medical intervention or choose to not vaccinate themselves or their kids. We don't know what their life expectancy, quality of life or mortality rate is in our modern day, with the advancements in hygiene, technology and post-disease-diagnosis medical care availability being considered. It could absolutely be worse, statistically, but we wouldn't know.

For nationally reported statistics we are left then with bad data on one side, and no control group data on the other. Hardly the recipe for safe or settled scientifically guided medical care.

Now where does that leave you and me? Our highly subjective yet somehow infallible weaponry of mortality rates – whether from national statistics or the social media horror stories – has us and all our friends and family swinging the manic flag of 'People are dying!'

This flu season for example, some of our friends are saying 'People are dying from flu! Get vaccinated! Take medication!' or other friends are saying 'People are dying from adverse reactions to medications/shots! Don't get vaccinated! Drink elderberry!'

And we are all running for the nearest remedies that we are sure will help us – why? Because of statistics – OR because we don't see statistics reflecting our lived reality, so we do the best we can to discern our health without statistics.

But I'm the one creating these statistics and I offer you this: If you take one thing away from this, take away a healthier skepticism about even the most excepted mainstream, nationally reported, CDC or other 'scientific' statistics.

Humans who had no concept of their national impact made them. The numbers are not hard – they are very, very fluid. And conversely, have a healthier skepticism about all the alternative remedies we welcome as hopeful scientific-ish options. There is no unbiased, century long, data capture system set up for these choices either.

As a parent, the most painful part of taking a step back and looking at all this, is having to humbly admit – I don't know what the right thing to do is.

I don't have the unbiased data I need to make the safest decision for my children.

I don't know what the right thing to do is for myself, or for my husband.

I don't know what side of the fence to stand on in the vaccination and mainstream medicine battlefield, and I don't want to stand on a side: I just want the unbiased, uncorrupted and standardized data needed to accurately assess the benefits vs. the ultimate risks for my family's health.

In the face of this fallible data capture system, my own resolution that I am willing to publicly recommend – no matter what medical choices you decide is best – would be for us all to become self reporters. Keep a health journal for each family member complete with dates and times and severity of symptoms of illness and track dates and dosages of any medical treatment administered.

Track degree of fevers, severity of migraines, frequency of ear infections, changes of behavior, hospitalizations, medications dosages and immunization combinations etc.

Think critically and ask questions when you see inconsistencies in any health recommendations offered to you or your family. Request and encourage a satisfactory discussion of benefits and risks with your medical provider.

Download and thoroughly read the manufacturers insert provided on the FDA's website for any medication or immunization you are considering and verify that you are a good candidate for that medication.

If you decide to use that medical treatment, record any minor reactions in the health journal and immediately report any somewhat severe reactions to your medical provider and ask for that information to be added to your electronic medical record so that it might inform any future medical provider on your individual contraindications you may have in other medication courses.

Remember that each of us is liable for our own health choices, you cannot expect a medical provider to be a perfect assessor of what's best for you.

Follow up and make sure proper reporting was done on the medical provider's part to the appropriate national databases, or report it yourself.

MedWatch reports for medications and VAERS reports for vaccines.

This recommendation is less for you and more for others and for the sake of having the appropriate authorities informed so they can eventually take medical treatments off the market and create the demand for safer ones.

Those kind of databases can only function well for the populations they serve if they are being used by everyone.

My Final Thought: Yes, people are dying. Everyday. I do their death records every flu season or surfing season.

And try as hard as we do – and no matter how absolutely shredded inside I am especially when I do an infant or child's death certificate- we will never eradicate death.

We CAN work to slowly eradicate and reform bad systems and misinformation. And even though there is no immediate gratification in it, we will probably save more lives when we work intelligently, truthfully and ethically towards a better future. And that usually starts with a lot of humility and admitting that change is needed.

If anyone has ideas, would like to share their thoughts or their own expertise for consideration, or somehow otherwise contribute to unifying this polarized health battlefield, feel free to add a comment.

Original Source.

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the-grumpy-panda · 7 years ago

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Dollars To Doughnuts, Whatever That Means!

I assume it means I had dollars, but now I have doughnuts. Magic! We'll start this one with some sweet stuff, and hopefully before the impending diabetes takes my foot I'll have time to get into some not so sweet stuff before circling back to the sweets once again for a finishing move. Oof. This might be the point where I acknowledge all this junk food is adversely effecting me. Should I switch to reviewing food that is actually proper and healthy? Perhaps. Perhaps. Perhaps. Maybe I'll just ride it out until the first heart attack. Here we go, then! -Entenmann's Donut Shoppe doughnuts! Entenmann's generally makes good products, so will their attempt to dress up a bit for the party be a boon or a bust? There are three versions out now, and to save some space and time, I'll group them together. There's a Black & White iced doughnut, a Spring Flower iced doughnut and a Party Sprinkled iced doughnut. Only the spring one expressly says "limited edition" but I have no idea if the others are permanent or if this line of product will be one in constant flux. They're all good, but nothing about them is really all that different from normal Entenmann's eats, save for the color of the icing (the flower is pink and the party one is white) and the addition of sprinkles. I did find myself enjoying the Black & White doughnut the most out of the three. If I had to guess it's probably because the other two are glazed AND iced, and then topping them with sprinkles very nearly puts them at "too sweet" levels. -Mississippi Mud Pie Oreos! Is Oreo trying to get sneaky? Is this just a regular chocolate Oreo with a new name? Does the "whipped cream" flavored cream taste different than regular Oreo cream? The answer is... a little bit, but only if you eat the whipped cream half of the cream by itself and really take a moment to analyze it. If eating the cookie as a whole... yup. It tastes like a chocolate Oreo. The whipped cream but gets wholly lost among the chocolate cream and the chocolate cookie. Zoinks. How many times can one person say cream? -Deep Fried Twinkie! I thought these were a Wal Mart exclusive, but I just happened upon them willy-nilly in a local grocer. I guess I'm just lucky like that, he said with a face that would suggest otherwise. A frozen treat that needs to be baked, so they might be stretching the deep fried concept a wee bit, although the cooking instructions do list frying as an option, so maybe I'm just being persnickety. Nonetheless, it's a Twinkie covered in a batter of sorts, and I chose to bake it to keep things as simple and mess free as possible. It comes out smelling of a warm cake doughnut, so it's off to a good start. All in all, it rather tastes like a funnel cake. The Twinkie aspect is hardly noticeable. I like funnel cake, so that's fine, but ultimately this isn't as fun as it should have been. Maybe the experience would be better served if one ate a deep fried Twinkie at some sort of festival, where it would presumably be some semblance of "fresh", but that's for you to tell me about. Eventually I'll finish off the box, but I imagine they'll linger in my freezer until I have no other sweets to satiate my cravings. -Deep Fried Banana Twinkie! Another version? Yep. There's also a chocolate one, but the store didn't have those. This one has some sort of graham cracker coating. If it weren't for the darker coloring and the box saying so, I don't think I'd ever have noticed any difference at first. These want very badly to taste like a caramelized banana. It gets close enough to remind you of that superior treat, but doesn't quite master the connection, and I think it's the coating that hinders this one. It's not bad all things considered, but I don't foresee myself going back for another anytime soon. Crunchy chippy time! -Lay's BLT potato chips! Smell faintly of a smoked barbecue chip, but one that was left out and is now old and stale. The chip is festooned with all kinds of specks that I assume is what the ingredient list claims is simply "BLT Seasoning" but no real flavor comes through. This is another in a series of recent snack foods that simply fail to taste like anything other than the most basic aspect of the item. Meaning these merely taste like a potato chip. Where's the bacon? Where's the tomato? Two flavors easily concocted in other snacks. Hell, where's the lettuce? If you can make pickle flavor into a chip, you can do lettuce. But you probably wouldn't anyway, so I can forgive the lettuce flavor being missing. No one is buying this chip for lettuce flavoring. Maybe my hopes were up to high for this one, but they disappointed me all the same. -Lay's Lime & Sea Salt potato chips! The smell is distinctly lime and sea salt, so that's a good sign. Definitely a lime flavor all over these, with a light trace of salt. Not bad. I've never had dry margarita mix, but I imagine it might taste like this chip. I like these. Not overpowering at all. You pop 'em in, have a fun moment, and then the taste casually goes away, leaving you wanting more. I probably would have eaten the whole bag were it not for making a conscious decision not to. -Lay's Kettle Cooked Sweet Chili & Sour Cream potato chips! Delectably crunchy! I love me a kettle cooked chip. I don't know the science behind what makes them come out different, but I heartily approve. Fortunately for me, I'm not getting a strong sour cream flavor here. I like sour cream the condiment fine, but for some reason it never translates all that well onto a chip for me. These chips mostly taste of the sweet chili, and it's pretty good. A nice little kick that isn't too hot, it doesn't burn the palate, it just pats your taste buds a top o' the morning, and carries on about its business. Maybe the sour cream aspect is the silent handyman behind these not being too hot. A cooling down flavor barely noticeable? Could be! You know, now I want to dip these into actual sour cream and try them that way. Again, I had to make myself not eat the whole bag. Even harder to put down than the lime and sea salt ones. Two out of three ain't bad, as they say. Good work here, Lays! -Pringles Loud Super Cheesy Italian chips! Are Pringles classified as chips? I don't think I've ever thought they were. If you say "Go get me some chips." you'll get some form of potato chip. Tortilla chips get specified, and if you want Pringles, you specify Pringles. So what are they??? Anyway, I don'y know what 'loud' is supposed to mean. Oh, wait. The top of the can says "Bold Flavor. Epic Crunch." Okay, then. These smell like gym socks. These taste like an old corn chip dipped in old sink water in a dingy restaurant with a weird 'wheaty' aftertaste. Gross. -Pringles Loud Spicy Queso chip things! These smell like that gross and fake nacho cheese sauce concoction that I simply don't like, and it's a condiment that makes any item it's put on or any item dipped in it immediately sad. Not a good start for these. Yup. they taste like a tortilla that was dipped into a spicy nacho cheese sauce and left on the counter to dry out and get extra gross. No thank you, Pringles Loud! Now back to sweet! Oh, sugar... you sweet talking killer, you. -Pillsbury S'mores Mini Pies! These are definitely mini, and come out of the package looking like a flat cookies and cream dough of some sort. Ever have a Toaster Strudel? These s'more pies come with a frosting packet just like those do, only in chocolate flavor. Damn it, Pillsbury. I buy junk food to avoid effort. Why do you make me frost my own coffin sweets? Baking it certainly puffs it up, and it smells of a s'more, and that's just fine. The taste is merely chocolate and graham cracker, which isn't to say that's bad. There is a marshmallow component clearly visible on the inside, but the flavor is completely overshadowed by the other two and while the marshmallow aids in keeping the treat from being too dry, the taste element is sadly missed. Oops, wait a second. Eating a bite from the dead center of this brings the marshmallow into play. That was a good bite. Maybe I didn't bake it long enough to get the marshmallow oozy and gooey properly, or maybe they skimped on the marshmallow. Jinkies. How many times can one person say marshmallow? All in all, not bad. I think it might be more of a treat best served in winter, though. Let's break norm here and venture into what technically passes as breakfast items nowadays. I don't agree with that assessment, as I know junk food when I see it, but who am I to argue with decades upon decades of contrary opinions and sales facts. -Eggo Chocolatey Chip Banana frozen waffles! I've never been fond of frozen waffles. Just cardboard to me. Will this iteration be any different? Right out of the box they smell like a banana split sundae, so that was surprising and pleasant. Taste wise... they taste like a banana flavored frozen waffle with chocolate chips. I'm not sure how I feel about these, truth be told. I'm impressed that they were able to get two distinct flavors to come out with neither being too faint or too overpowering. It's right on the mark, but it still leaves me with a sad frozen waffle flavor at the end of it all, which I just don't like. As far as frozen waffles go, I must admit these are the best I've had (which isn't many) but I don't think they've quite convinced me I may have been wrong about frozen waffles all this time. -Kellogg's Disney Princess cereal! I... don't know why I bought this. It jumped out at me for reasons undecipherable. Never let it be said that bright packaging and cute cartoon ladies aren't a direct marketing ploy, even to a grumpy ol' panda such as myself. Kellogg's, you evil geniuses! A heart shaped, strawberry flavored cereal with marshmallows. They don't taste like strawberry, though. Rather, it's more akin to a slightly sweeter Lucky Charms. I'm not sure what the two marshmallow shapes are supposed to be. A tiara and a flower? Or a Gremlin claw and a demon summoning amulet. Yeah, that sounds about right. Okay, then. Time to find something manly to do to offset this cereal purchase. My eyebrows have been needing some plucking and shaping. Cream. Marshmallow.

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