#these are free to good home btw

[aethersea]

📚 [sorry I didn't know what book to go with so I picked many haha]

You send multiple books, you get multiple fics! Kinda. See, I really want to read the stories that the people of Gotham come up with about their resident vigilante cryptids—rumors, urban legends, wattpad rpf with dubious content warnings, all of it. I have a whole list of increasingly insane theories about what the batfam’s whole deal even is, but I never got any further than writing the frame story for one of them.

Some highlights from the list include:

Batman is a warlock and Robin is a demon bound to serve him. When ten years are up, Robin gets Batman’s soul.

Batman and Robin live in the sewers and can pop up anywhere in Gotham via manhole covers. They’re always fighting Killer Croc for real estate.

Obligatory vampire theory! Batman is a vampire and Robin is the person he feeds from. If Robin dies, Batman will go into a frenzy of bloodlust and drain half the city dry.

Robin is a trickster spirit who helps Batman out because it’s fun, and because the Joker’s bad sense of humor pisses him off. Batman has to keep him constantly entertained or he’ll run off and join the Riddler.

Cass (in her terrifying void-black costume) is the vengeful shade of the previous Batgirl, who finally clawed her way back from the afterlife and is here to take no prisoners.

Vampire theory v2: This Time With Duke! Everyone’s a creature of night and darkness except Signal, who is the sun incarnate. STRONG teen paranormal romance vibes, heavy-handed metaphors of self-destructive love or something, definitely involves shipping Signal with one or more batkids.

Batman is a professional comedian who got sick of Joker’s bad clowning. Things got out of hand.

Batman & Robin aren’t real. Criminals are making them up. 

One of my favorites, though, is the theory that Robin is the ghost of a murdered child, who wants revenge for his murder but, in the meantime, is willing to help Batman make sure no more children end up like him. This would be a story written by one of Dick’s classmates, maybe for English class. Dick reads it and it’s a whole emotional roller coaster ride, especially the scene where Robin’s ghost looks in on his living parents, as he does often to make sure they’re safe, and wishes more than anything that he could hold them and be held by them just one more time.

[teletraantwo]

Thinking about TF Prime Optiratch angst.

Established Optiratch but nobody else knows it. Optimus has reasons for wanting to keep their relationship fully a secret but on Earth where the group is in such close proximity all the time they may as well not be conjunxed at all with how they interact. And it’s fine. Ratchet is fine. He’s closed off that pain because he has a JOB to do and Optimus has his reasons.

But when June Darby starts coming around that changes. Ratchet isn’t threatened by her, of course. Even if there was something going on Humans have such short lives compared to Cybertronians. But she serves to make fresh the hurt he’d learned to ignore. A reminder that things have grown so cold between them that another is wholly unaware she is flirting with a conjunxed bot. And yeah, Optimus has his reasons. And yeah, they’re good and logical reasons, after all the Decepticons catching on that they’re conjunxes would put a massive target on Ratchet’s back and Optimus is nothing if not protective. But that doesn’t make it feel any less like Optimus is so embarrassed to be conjunxed to a bot like him that he’d rather pretend they aren’t.

Ratchet getting snappier with Optimus. Not wanting to come out and say anything, not with the others around, but still being hurt and angry and afraid. Afraid that Optimus is going to realize it’s not worth being with him anymore and the one thing that kept him going when things got hardest, the idea that there would come a day where they’ve made it safe to simply relax for a bit and enjoy being together and all the lost time spent pretending can be made up for, will be gone.

It coming to a head when Optimus asks him to join him on patrol, and Ratchet starts to panic. It only getting worse as they drive out to a secluded location because there really was no patrol, Optimus had checked the area earlier to make sure they would be alone. Ratchet demanding to know what the breaking point was. Is he really so embarrassing to be conjunxed to? Why would someone like Optimus even be with a bot like him in the first place if he only intended to throw him away?

Meanwhile Optimus is very confused because he had noticed how on edge Ratchet had been getting, and sincerely missed their tine spent together too. He just wanted an evening out where nobody would bother them for at least a short while, not to break their bond. But now he has to deal with just how badly he’s hurt his partner.

[holmsister]

Au in which kabru is this super celebrity. Probably an unusual sort, like a short-lived races rights activist that started out as a model but then people started getting into his politics podcast. He started out as extremely online but by now he has been like... interviewed by the dunmeshi equivalent of conan O'brien. He's a household name people on the street recognise him.

One time it's like 3am and he goes to get a real dinner after this unending after party where they only served drinks and he's just so fucking tired of being himself you know? He just wishes he could be a fucking nobody for a bit.

Enter the waiter at this cafe. His name tag says Laios. He's blonde and 185cms tall. He gets Kabru's name wrong three times and stutters when Kabru calls him 'darling'. Kabru falls in love immediately.

[coldpintglass]

The Sun (happiness, success, optimism, vitality, joy, confidence, truth)

Four of wands (community, home, celebrations, reunions, stability, belonging)

The Star (hope, inspiration, positivity, faith, renewal, healing, rejuvenation)

[alex51324]

I can't tell if this is real:

https://meidasnews.com/news/internet-reacts-to-golden-hoofed-trump-cash-covered-goat-idol-at-mar-a-lago

Golden-Hoofed, Trump Cash-Covered Goat Idol at Mar-a-Lago

The statue is covered in $100 Trump bills that say, “In Trump we Trust,” replacing God with Trump

The site, Meidas News, appears to be a genuine, non-satirical news source. The source of the images is an unnamed Mar-A-Lago member who says they took the pictures there.

I haven't heard of Meidas News before--it could be that they're just being credulous about this extremely dubiously-sourced item.

I mean this is just too on-the-nose to be real, right?

If it somehow actually is real, then the only possible explanation is that he's seeing how close he can come to actually saying out loud that he's the Antichrist before the Evangelicals catch on.

[chompe-diem]

ok i've listened to the latest ep now and u cannot tell me albin and sol are not qpr. sorry but they are bonded 4 lyfe like that. we already knew this but now it's finally canon. Do Not Ask Caldwell Or Murph but it's canon. i'm not crazy-

[seaofreverie]

This reminds me, two weeks left until I'm going to my first concert of the year!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳

[kannibalkaiii]

🦈 Mauga won my poll

He's a big ol Tiger Shark y'all

Im glad he did cuz I feel this suits him.

-

Og sketch below cut

[blossoms-phan]

im booooooorred can they upload

[autixel]

In pain again, Carl you're getting the menstrual cramps treatment

[justapieceintheirgames]

happy valentine's day maryam beloved 🥰💗

GABY!! You're such a sweetheart, thank you for thinking of me!! Happy flat Dokja Friday Valentines to you too!! *MWAH!*

[cuntrytaylor]

i opened my hinge for a quick second today and some girl sent me a message diagnosing me w autism 😭😭😭

[momentomori24]

Ahhh, the September 5th. The day after the 5 year anniversary of the Sans being in Smash reveal. *blows kiss at my 12 year old self* Happy anniversary of a very happy memory to you too, you little unhinged maniac. This is all for you.

[magikmaelstrom]

@rockstonewizard I need a fire mana stone. I will give you this rock in exchange.

trust me, it's for a good cause.

[hawkeyedflame]

.

[currentlylurking]

Every few months my brain conveniently misplaces my band class trauma and lack of skill with rock music to think about making a Dumpty Humpty concept album full of songs loosely connected to DP characters and plot events.

Anyway I dug up old lyrics I wrote for them last night and now I'm hyperfocused.