#therefore. im gonna put it off for at least the next month i think

[oflgtfol]

its been like two weeks since i fucked my back up and uhm there's been zero improvement in my back pain. starting to get concerned

[logisticalandrewthinks-blog]

Rebirth

Feel like i gotta put an edgy title, even if I'm not feeling as edgy at this moment in time. its been a little while, a little over two years in fact, last i posted was August 7th 2022, now its August 30 2024.

I've graduated university now, and was lucky enough to have snagged a job before I finished that pays decent and has alright upward mobility. I'm wondering if I should feel happy now or if that will come later? it feels all a little too empty. Although I am not in the depths of despair that I used to always be in when I posted on here, i am feeling slightly empty on is this all life is now. I'm moving in with Hung next year, so theres that to look forward to, and also the Japan trip is finally happening, of which I have done my best to plan and organise, I realise now that if I want to do something, I should organise it, otherwise nobody will do it, since the people I tend to surround myself with are very low maintenance people who therefore aren't really planners much with the exception of like Kass I guess, who enjoys this sort of thing of being organised and planning for things. But I do have Japan to look forward to I guess, I am excited for that, but a part of me does wonder if all I will do now in life is just make money so that I can go on holiday, and then work, then go on holiday. I dont really have many aspirations to own a house or even relationship stuff much at the moment, though next year maybe ill try to date again to see if im any different to it, and if im alright to date now. Its more that in my future I see other people getting together with other people, and i feel like i should follow suit, like i should have myown person that im with too, since at a certain point of our lives i assume we wont see eachother as much since they'll be preoccupied with their significant others.

All this talk of is this all life amounts to and tangentially being related to that, the worth and happiness of a life made me go back and read an old manga that I really liked when i first read it back in the day called "I sold my life for ten thousand yen per year." which is about a guy who does just what the title says, he sells his remaining life til just three months, since he has nothing to live for but not a lot of money, so why not live a few months in luxury at least. I won't regurgitate the entire story but its worth a read again future Andrew if you're still there, thats quite touching and gets you thinking about the worth and happiness of a life.

This is probably the most mentally healthy I've ever typed into my blog, materialistically things are looking up for me, I'm gonna be making decent starting wage with benefits at a (allegedly) good company, Ill be doing hybrid so work from home some days and work in office other days. I have a group of friends online that i frequently join the voice calls daily to hang out and game if that occurs or watch things. These extend to real life too, seeing friends in real life and interacting with them. Its all going in a way, materialistically very well, and yet I can't help but feel, "is this it?". Like am I supposed to just do this for another 40 years til I retire, to then just rot away and die?

Something I did do this year which I really enjoyed was travelling, I went to morocco with oogin + HABS people which was an amazing short trip, a 8/10 experience could only be made better if we were there longer, paris with chrystal and josh 💀 was a 5/10 but mainly cause of being a third wheel of a couple that I don't think should be together, maybe I'll keep a record of their thing later if I can be bothered, and also went to the peak district to try outdoor climbing for the first time, and then to manchester recently for a wellness chec kinda thing for chrystal, since she always visited us but we never visited her but i said i wanted to, so i said fuck it ill organise it, when are you guys off and so 4 of us went up north to manchester for two days. But all this to say, I really do enjoy travelling, I finally understood why those hippie sorts of people spend their entire lives travelling, I used to think oh it must get so tiring and so boring so fast, wouldnt you want to just sit down and chill? but you can! you can sit down and chill underneath a blanket of stars, or sit by a warm fire, and just look out into the distant deserts of morocco. I really enjoy travelling and I hope to do a lot more this next year.

Something else i took up in the last two years is bouldering, its a hobby that i genuinely enjoy, I've been climbing for two years, on and off, (maybe like 6 months total where i didnt climb so technically one and a half years) but its what inspired me to then go outdoor bouldering with puru armaan and yossi which was a fun trip, though it was humbling how difficult it is! currently I can climb v4-v5 indoors but i could barely only climb V0+ outdoors, which is like beginner grading, which is pathetic 😭 hopefully next time will be better.

I'm not really here to say much else, If i think of something Ill post again soon, but its 8 am and ive stayed up all night to watch LE SSERAFIM's comeback "CRAZY" which is really fucking good. Thats another thing I've done in the last two years, is gone back to my kpop roots cept this time i have the disposable income to irresponsibly spend money on merch and albums for LE SSERAFIM. the music and obsession as a hobby has really helped though, it gets me through the hard times seeing the behind the scenes and watching the live streams and hearing them talk about their lives. Bias is Miyawaki Sakura since I already kinda was biased for her in IZONE when she streamed gaming content on youtube and made videos for gaming.

I would say to end this post that LE SSERAFIM and Bouldering funnily enough have saved me, in the last two years. Two years ago i was hurt fairly badly by people who i thought i was close to, though perhaps i never was since its an online friendship, how close can a online friendship be? obviously an online friendship can be very close, but it depends alot, and it seems perhaps this was not one of those times. I dont recall if i ever actually outlined what happened from my point of view as a record, so maybe ill do that. haha i always say ill write these things and never get round to doing it. it does help somewhat though, clear my thoughts by writing in this blog, so i really should do it more often, maybe now im more mentally well ill do it???? who knows. we shall see in the next one.

I shall leave with le sserafims latest song that got released 4 hours ago, which is the cuntiest thing i have heard in a while, and will defo be a bop to remember, and so future andrew!! relearn your roots!!! go back to listening to le sserafim and rest up!!!

[sailorhyunjinz]

What do you think first kiss with skz be like?

aAWH SOME FLUFF T-T OK BUT KEEP IN MIND- fluff is not my strongest pursuit hence why im not a fluff writer hahsah but HEY ITS CUTE!! and anon,,, im so sorry this took such time IM SO SO SORRY AAAAAAAAH- 

also this makes me wanna know my anons first kiss story, AAAH SPILL THEM 

warnings; none?? fluff,,, wow,, rare to say that LMAO- also gn!reader and also suggestiveee??

Bangchan

~gentleman~

will only kiss you if you are REALLY ready for it and if the two of you are dating

doesnt want to rush you into things (even if its just a kiss) because he doesnt know how comfortable you are and such

basically a sweetheart

i imagine its like a cute little date

 night where you guys are stargazing, lying on a blanket on a grassy hill with his arm as a pillow for your head

“chan, look! its a shooting star! make a wish” you giggle to which he smiles, looking at your pretty features that are lit up by the moonlight

“hmm,,, dear star, i wish that y/n would kiss me” he says, laughing directly after but soon being interupted as you attach your plushy lips against his

its probably the most romantic event in your life

him smiling into the kiss as your tongues danced around softly

when you pulled away you laughed, saying; “wishes do really come true, huh?”

poor baby is blushing, his ears red but thankfully for him its too dark for you to see

Minho

the “evil roommate that secretly has feelings for you”

“lee minho i swear im gonna rip your hair off if you touch my plants again”

minho got out of his room, looking at you standing in the living room and rearranging the plants on the windowsill 

“they are all scattered, it’s ugly” he says rudely

“dont call my children ugly” you spit back at him 

there was always a weird tension between you and minho. you were glad to have found a roommate that made a good friend eventhough he was a pain in the ass sometimes

minho liked you,,, and therefore he did everything the opposite of what he felt. if he wanted to compliment you on your outfit he would instead say that you looked “overdressed” or “too much” but you always rolled your eyes towards his snarky comments

you pecked your plants, giving them the love they needed and minho just stood frozen in the doorway, without thinking he spoke

“how come you never do that to me?”

silence

you sneered, placing down the plant you held and streched out your arms

“c’mere if you dare” you said jokingly, not expecting the boy you always thought was so devilish to run into your arms, lips touching and your eyes widening at the unexpected action

the two of you held each other, breathing shaky as wet tongues collided, the sun beaming upon your figures

“m-minho,,, it was a joke!” you laughed, slapping his arm playfully as you pulled away

“but to me it wasn’t” he remarked cockily, licking the inside of his cheek

Changbin

very much giving me like “we dont like each other but we have to work with each other”

like you two are co-workers, working in a boring office and you were assigned to put together this one report and,,, lets say Changbin wasnt your favorite in the office

there was nothing wrong with him,,, its just his vibe that was off putting but sigh,,, work is work

you started compiling information, sitting in a seperate room and drawing graphs on the whiteboard, projecting some other type of research onto the board

“do you think we will need to stay late?” he asks, ruffling his hair in frustration

you sigh and nod, this wasnt going to get done anytime soon.

dawn set on horizon and the others workers packed up their belonging one by one and left until there was only you and changbin left in the now quiet office

you sat next to him, yawning as you typed something as you felt him looking at you

you looked back with a questionable expression, confused when he uttered his words

“do you hate me, y/n?”

“i mean,,, you are a dick sometimes but i dont hate you, at least you do your work”

he shrugged his shoulders, loosening his necktie as he leaned back into the office chair

“a dick, huh? maybe i try to push you away so you wont catch the same feelings i have for you”

you snapped your head towards him. you couldnt lie, he was attractive and at this point you were desperate 

“kiss me then” you said simply causing the boy to immediately cup your cheeks, latching onto your lips as if he’d waited for this moment for forever

more tongue, wants you to feel him ;))

lets just say,,, he made it up to you

Hyunjin

i get this like,,, youthful vibe,,, like the two of you were childhood friends

and,,, eventually you catch feelings for him which you hate because,,, you dont want to ruin this friendship 

every time somebody mistook you for a couple the both of you would make retching noises, mocking each other

“you think my standards are that low?” hyunjin says pointing at you to which you raise your fist

“hwang hyunjin, you’re dead meat”

but,,, he was only in denial, it was his childhood friend afterall

probably happened at one of those night where your mom was working late and you invited hyunjin to keep you company, him bringing kkami as well. 

“dont fucking burn the pizza, hyunjin” you say, petting kkami until the little rascal ran away from your lap

“if you helped it wouldnt be burned” he replies as he comes out with two plates with the pizza burned on the edges

“but if they taste bad you can always taste my lips” he jokes and you look at him with a disgusted facial expression before laughing

“i bet they taste even worse then your mess of a pizza, i would like to see you try to even get me to peck you” you scoff and hyunjin rolls his eyes, sitting next to you on the sofa

“try it then” he taunts but is taken aback when you actually kiss him, your nose accidentally brushing against his as you purse your lips, hyunjin timidly using his tongue to test the waters

he wanted it so bad and he finally got it >:(( he could swear that he heard fireworks going off in his brain

a moment of silence appeared until hyunjin cockily uttered:

“so,,, did they taste better?”

Jisung

the “i met you at a party and made out with you drunk”

he stared at you the entire night, catching glances while you looked away and the music blared in the nightclub that was packed with people.

you ordered a drink at the bar, tapping your fingers on the oak surface where you rested your arms, suddenly somebody bumped into you

turning around you saw jisung and you sighed, thinking his behaviour was starting to get annoying

“oh its you again” you said loud for him to hear as he sat down next to you, having a annoying smirk plastered on his lips

“looks like you are having fun, let me guess,,, you’re trying to get over your ex” jisung says, leaning his elbow against the bar and you glared at him because it was true

you scoffed, avoiding his question and instead sipping on the sour drink you had in your hands, trying to forget everything

he was attractive which only pissed you off even more, as if you hadnt had enough pretentious assholes in your life

the glass slammed against the table as you put it down harshly, gazing into the boys dark brown eyes

“alright, deal. make me forget then since you think you know everything about me” you stated to which jisung raised his eyebrow

the palm of his hand was firmly placed on the bar as he leaned in to kiss you, feeling the bitter liquour hitting his tastebuds as your tongues crashed against each other

it felt,,, freeing. you swung your arms around his neck, wanting him closer to your body

by the way he was kissing you, you could tell that he was there for the same reason as you. a sloppy and heated kiss to fill your thoughts with something other than your ex

safe to say that the kiss progressed ;))))

Felix

aaah cutie boyfriend that is just too shy to even give you a kiss like 3 months into the relationship (OK DONT ATTACK ME NOW, TAKE YOUR TIME, NO RUSH YOU GUYS)

he is shy with pretty much everything, it was only recently he could hold your hand without his heart jumping out of his chest.

it was a simple date night! takeout and games at his place

you layed your head in his lap as you watched him finish up the game that you had given up on a long time ago

he shifted awkwardly in his seat, not used to being so close to such a pretty person before

“ah- fuck! i lost again,,,” he says in defeat, his head rolling backwards before a frustrated sigh escaped his lips

“you did well felix! look how far you got!” you say, pointing towards the score on the screen but not getting his attention. 

you sat up, looking at him for a moment as his eyelashes lightly draped over his closed eyes, cheeks speckled with freckles

you couldnt help yourself, he looked so angelic despite being defeated and so you leaned in, lacing your fingers with his and softly placing your lips against his

he opened his eyes in panic before being swallowed by the fluffy feeling of having your lips to himself, he giggled before stroking your cheek as he tilted his head, almost setting a rhythm to the sweet kiss

felix started laughing shyly, cheeks tinged with red as he hid his face with a pillow

“but you won my kiss!” you said through a smile causing felix to blush even more

Seungmin

its like,,, maybe,,, your third or fourth date??

this one is more chill than the previous ones that were at like some fancy restaurang because hello dandy puppy boy wants class

but this one was like a stroll down the night streets and eating ice cream in the middle of the summer

both of you were casually dressed, holding hands as butterflies bubbled in your stomach from the contact

his hand is all warm and it engulfs yours >:(

you look at all the pretty sights of the night, eventually climbing up to some like high point and looking down at all the lights that blinked

after a good 1 1/2 hours of walking your legs were starting to ache and so you both sat down on the swings of a desolate playground, swinging gently with your legs dangling

“i dont understand how you’re able to,,, even be friends with me,,, or whatever we are,,”

seungmin hummed, looking up into the night sky

“i promise y/n, i will be your,,, friend but,,,”

you looked at him as he said “but”, imagining the worst 

“i dont wanna be friends, i wanna be more than a friend to you”

his eyes twinkled as he stood up and stood infront of you, grabbing your hand

you slowly looked up at him, his figure standing in the way of the moon as the two of you shared a long gaze, his eyes as sweet as honey, dripping with pure adoration

you pulled him closer by the hand and slowly he inched to your lips, the distance between you minimizing as his face tilted to the right, a delicate and sugary kiss landing on your tastebuds from the ice cream from earlier.

your heart skipped a beat, the slightest sound of lips smacking

“i think i love you y/n” he whispered close to your lips after pulling away. 

Jeongin

like,,, uni buddies! 

both being med students meant late study night, usually in school 

there’s papers and diagrams laid out all over the tables and floors along with a bunch of energy drink cans, some scribbles on the whiteboard 

the two of you were friends and met in uni and everyone had always nagged at you for not going after him since he was everything someone ever wanted

you always said that you were friends and that you couldnt imagine being in a relationship with jeongin

but studying with him alone into the deep night felt different, many times you couldnt concentrate when he looked so cute sitting right beside you

being close friends, there was nothing weird about hugging or leaning against each other and so you leaned against his shoulder and yawned as the cozy boy was rewriting some notes. 

“one hour left y/n and then- then we can go hoooome!”

you giggled as you looked at him and he diverted his attention from his papers to you, his lips only mere inches from yours

you didnt know what the fuck you were doing and neither did jeongin, it was late and the both of you were tired from studying for finals

and so your lips drew closer until they clashed, feeling a tension that you’ve never felt with him before

he’s definitely a shy,,, kisser?? not too much tongue since he doesnt know how LMAO so its like soft >:((

didnt know what to do when he pulled away, looking around the room or covering his blushing face with his hands but when you hug him he hugs you back

maybe even coming to terms that he does have feeling for you,,, and so do you~ 

[weeb-writor]

Do you still love me?

Hello lovelies! Today I am back with a angst piece but a happy ending don't fret too much! I was really thinking about making it end horribly or leaving it up to the readers imagination but I decided nahh i couldn't do that to my heart. So here Bakugou and his s/o who fell out of love??(or did they??) when then have a large family in the mix. I have also decided im kind of obsessed with domestic pieces lol, they are like more than half of all my posts. Anywho, reader is neutral hope you guys enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bakugou Katsuki x Reader

You and Bakugou call its quits not thinking of what it would do to your 5 kids who are stuck in the middle

Words:  3606

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are we going to dad’s today?” Hiroyuki asked softly.

“Yeah, your going to spend the weekend with him, all of you.” You smiled at him.

“Can I bring Tokki?” He said looking at the ground already knowing your answer.

“We went over this last time baby, Daddy can't have pets at his new place and Tokki is a cat, he likes staying at home.” You said with a sigh. It really sucks that it came down to this, spend a week with you then a weekend with dad, then rinse repeat. Sometimes you even wondered if it was better. That’s what you and Bakugou told each other, I mean what else can you do when you fall out of love? You approached your car where all of your other children were waiting. You and Hiroyuki sat down and signaled the diver to go.

“We going to daddy’s right?” Kohana said as she bounced around in her seat. You booped her nose and nodded at her.

“Yay, daddy’s home!” Yoko said, clapping.

“Don't get excited Yoko, Dad’s probably busy. Were probably gonna be with Grandpa and Grandma.” Hiroyuki said playing with your fingers.

“You're so dramatic Yuki! Of course dad is busy! He is a Hero but he always makes time for us.” Your oldest said little explosion going off around her.

“Kaori.” You warned her with a stern voice. The little sparks calmed and she went back to quietly gazing out the window. 

“Your dad is a hero and therefore busy but I know he is very excited to see you all and will spend all the time he has with you.” You smiled at them. They all smiled back before going back into relative silence. When you and Bakugou decided to have a big family you were ecstatic and so was he. This, however, wasn't what you imagined. A tiny rift right threw your family and it was growing bigger everyday. When you told the kids about the spilt they didnt say much and the youngest ones didnt even really understand but as they lived through it, they changed. They formed their own opinions about who’s fault it is and why it happened. And now they were splitting up, there was Kaori the eldest who didn't care too much, Yoko, and Kohana. At the opposite end was Hiroyuki, just him. Your fragile little boy who was so sure it was his dad’s fault. Saiyuri was too young to choose a side but all the change wasn't really helping the 11th month old baby.

“We have arrived.” The diver announced. You thanked him while getting everyone out of the seats and exiting the car. Bakugou lived in an apartment now at the tippy top of course. It was a long and loud elevator ride as your kids were antsy to see their dad. When it opened Bakugou was standing there waiting for them and was immediately met with an armful of girls.

“Daddy! I missed you so much!” Kohana said almost in tears.

“Misses Daddy.” Yoko echoed her sister.

“Yeah, I missed all you brats too, you better have been on your best behavior! You have to keep up the Bakugou reputation.” He teased them

“Of course we have! I'm still number one in my quirk development classes. Yuki has the best grades in all of his grade. Kohana is reading at a 3rd grade level already and Yoko and Saiyuri are everyone's favorite at the Daycare!” Kaori said with vigor.

“Yeah, your all Bakugou’s for sure.” He chuckled at them. He turned to talk to Hiroyuki but he was gone. You heard a door shut, he was probably already in his room.

“I've got homework to do dad and them we should do something all together!” Kaori said kissing his check before taking off. Her sisters followed her as usual.

“How long do you think he’ll be like that?” Bakugou asked you with a sigh.

“Honestly I don't know, it's not like I tell him awful things about you. Maybe it would have been better if we did cause then he would have one thing to be angry about, one event, It would be easier than him just being angry at you.” You said placing Saiyuri onto the ground to walk around.

“They’re so mature and smart I forget they’re so young. Hell we don't understand why it happened, you can't just pinpoint a time where you fell outta love, it’s gradual. So how can we expect them too.” Bakugou said, sounding in pain.

“Yeah, sucks they had to witness it. I’ve got to go meet up with someone but just… He thinks you’re going to call your parents and abandon them to do Hero work. I know you can't put off everything but I think he just wants to know that for once he can come first to you.��� You said as you kissed Saiyoui’s forehead. You were about to enter the elevator when a weight crashed into you. You didn't have to look down too far to see Hiroyuki hugging you.

“Take care of Tokki, please.”

“Yes and you make sure you and your sisters behave for your dad.” He sighed but nodded at you. You gave him one last hair ruffle before leaving. You couldn't help but think this wasn't ever gonna get any easier. You sighed before heading to the next destination, a café to meet with a few of your friends.

“Y/N!” You heard a voice call to you as soon as you opened the door. You identified the voice as Mina.

“Mina! Long time no see!” You said giving her a hug.

“Y/n, dear come sit down.” Momo said smiling at you, you sat down with the group.

“How are you doing.” Mina asked you cautiously

“I’m surprisingly doing awful, I see Bakugou too much to truly get over him. The kids are still adjusting to us being apart and Hiroyuki has been really upset and distant. I thought breaking up would fix a lot but it just made everything worse.” You sighed out.

“Well of course it did!!!” Urakara whisper yelled.

“You and Bakugou called it quits way too soon! I've never seen someone handle Bakugou the way you do. I’ve never seen anyone love him like you. Hell Bakugou loves you so much it’s ridiculous! Do you remember when he was gonna put his hero work on hold because of Kaori! I’m sorry y/n but I’m not buying this fell out of love thing.” Deku rushed out.

“Mm I’d have to agree. If there is anything I’ve learned from being friends with Bakugou it’s that he never half ass anything and if he put time into it he’s gonna see it through till the end so, logically it doesn’t make sense.” Todoroki said quietly.

“Yeah so what’s your side of the story?” Mina asked carefully.

“I… loved him, you know and when we had kids it only intensified but now it’s different. Bakugou is a great dad don’t get me wrong but he’s absent and that was fine when it was just me, Kaori, Hiroyuki, and Kohana but now there is Yoko and Saiyuri. It’s hard when they all have different school times and different needs cause of their ages. It’s hard because I had to put part of my life on hold, I went to UA too and I was supposed to be one of the greatest support people out there, every agency would want me. But it was Bakugou’s dream first so I sacrificed it all in a heartbeat. Over the years he just got more busy and I got more left behind. I’m tired of waiting up till 3am to make sure he’s alright knowing I have to be up at 7 to get the kids ready for school. I… love him and I don’t want to argue with him and I could feel myself growing angry at him, feel myself growing resentful. So I brought it up under the disguise of “do you still love me” and he said No… so that was that and we were done the next week.” You said not meeting their eyes. They just looked at you with wide eyes.

“Y/n I’m sorry, I didn’t know you felt like this.” Momo said softly.

“It’s fine, he is the love of my life and our kids are my everything so I would do it all again, just for them.” You smiled with a few tears cascading down your face.

“You haven’t tried to talk to him about this, you still love him, you guys can fix this.” Deku said almost mumbling.

“But he doesn’t love me and so there is nothing to talk about. Now come on let’s talk about something else. You can hear sob stories like mine anytime.” You waved them off. They were hesitant but the conversation did pick up about their lives and your time at UA, at least the happy parts. The rest of your two days without your kids were a blur. You just remember waking up with your phone going off a Monday.

“Hello is this Bakugou Y/n?” A women’s said. The title hurt just a bit.

“Yes it is.” You responded drowsily.

“I am very sorry you have to receive a call like this but your son Bakugou Hiroyuki has been rushed to the hospital, his sister did refuse to leave his side so she is there as well.” You were silent before hanging up and immediately calling Bakugou.

“What’s up?” He rushed out. He sounded panicked so he must have gotten a call too.

“I need you to pick up Yoko and Saiyuri.” You said rushing to put in on your clothes.

“What? But yuki is in the hospital, we’ve got to be there.” He said 

“Yes but they are done with daycare in.” You paused to look at the clock on your way out the door. “A hour. If we don’t get them now we’ll have to leave him to get them.” You said finally in your car.

“Yeah and he would rather be with you than me…” he trailed off.

“I didn’t say that.” You rushed out

“You didn’t need to, I'll get them and be there as soon as I can.” He said hanging up. You sighed and continued your drive to the hospital. When you got there you rushed to the room where you looked in and saw your son unconscious and Kaori laying next to him.

“So he is going to be okay, we do want him to remain here for another day or two.” The doctor said to you, smiling.

“Okay but what’s wrong with him.” 

“Well he hasn’t been eating or drinking or sleeping enough, especially for a boy experiencing his growth spurt. Pair that with how much he has been using his quirk in class and you have a pretty bad situation.” She said as if it was nothing to worry about.

“Uhhh okay so we just need to make sure he is eating and drinking right?” You said pacing a little.

“Yeah and I would figure out what made him stop. Your daughter was very adamant about it not being abuse just that there was something going on at home and he is trying to deal with it.” The doctor said as you froze thinking you did this to him.

“Just a divorce…” you trailed off.

“Yeah that will do it but I don’t need to know about it. It's your business just make sure to talk to him so you don’t end up back here.” She said before leaving, you let out a few tears before heading into the room. Noticing you, Kaori got up and was hugging you tighter than she ever had.

“Did you know he wasn’t taking care of himself?” You asked, stroking her hair. She shook her head no.

“I didn’t either, I didn’t know it was hitting him so hard… you know you can ask me about anything, tell me anything… me and your dad will always be in your corner.” You said lifting her chin so you gazed into her eyes.

“But you're both not in our corner anymore. You guys are in to different corners and it’s hard to keep up with two different houses and two different.. well everything’s.” She said looking away from you.

“I never meant to you guys to feel like this, I just…” You trailed off but before you could finish Hiroyuki tossed and turned in his bed.

“Yuki sweetie, can you hear me?” You said as you rushed to his side.

“Mmm.” He said, he’s eyes still shut in pain.

“Oh baby, i'm so sorry I didn't notice you were in pain. It’s never gonna happen again, okay? Do you need something?” You said stroking his hair, he hummed before falling back to sleep. You sighed and kissed his forehead.

“So whats up with him?” Bakugou rushed into the room with the girls in his arms.

“He hasn’t been eating, or drinking, or sleeping. So when he used his quirk it drained his body and he’s here for 1 or 2 more days.” You said eyes never leaving his.

“That's impossible, he was just with me… he… didn't eat very much.” He trailed off. You hummed at him understanding how he was felling as you missed the signs too.

“Hey, girls I texted Grandma and Grandpa and they said they miss you so much. So while we take care of Yuki how about you guys go see them, yeah? Mr. Yuri is waiting to take you.” You smiled at them. You see a fire rise in Kaori but it goes out quick as Bakugou ruffles her hair.

“Okay then, be good for them and don't cause too much trouble. Mr. Yuri will pick up Kohana, Kaori please explain what's happening to her. And don't worry, we’ll see you real soon.” You said waving the girls out of the room. When they were out of sight you and Bakugou visually deflated. 

“Katsuki, how does this keep happening?” You asked him

“What?”

“How do things keep getting worse, first the break up, then the kids being mad at each other, Yuki’s anger at you, and now this.” You cried out.

“The break up was bad to you?” He asked voice cracking.

“Why wouldn't it be, Katsuki I know you don't love me anymore but I…” You trailed off

“Would you just spit it out dumbass! This is why we didn't work out because you never say shit. You just bottle it up and never lean on me or depend on me the way I do to you. You used to say “we're a team” all the time but in the last 2 years you haven't said it once. It was you who fell out of love with me so don't pretend like it was so hard for you.” He yelled at you.

“This is why we don't talk Katsuki, all you wanna do is yell and project all the feelings you bottle up from working so goddamn much. Of course it was hard on me and you would know why if you could drop your ego and talk to me like you can tolerate being around me or love me!” You yelled back at him but before the argument could turn into a big screaming match your sons voice rang out.

“Would you two just stop it…” He said weakly.

“Yuki, im sorry we shouldn't have been yelling even if you were asleep.” Bakugou said caressing his check. At the touch Hiroyuki let out the tears he’s been holding in.

“Its us isn't it?” He paused to look at you. “Me and my sisters… You had Kaori and me pretty young and you didn't really get to be young. You had all of us before you really got to live together just the two of you.. And Uncle Izuku and Auntie Urakara's relationship is doing fine even though they started to date around the same time as you, difference is they just started having kids like 4 years ago… Im 12 and Kaori is 13. So its us isnt?…” He said curling into himself.

“Kid, I'm not gonna lie to you, having you and Kaori at the ages we did was a nightmare. We were barely out of school, we lived with my parents for a while cause we didn't have jobs or a place of our own and even we did get one it was a shitty hole in the wall place but even at the young age of 19 we pulled our shit together and made it work so when you came a year later we were a lot more prepared. Yes we did miss out on a lot of things people our age did but we had you and Kaori and that was so much better than party’s and hangovers. Then we decided to have Kohana, Yoko, and Saiyuri and you all make us so happy. You all have nothing, not a damn thing to do with what's going on between me and y/n. If we ever made you feel like you did we didn't mean to. We love you so much and I am so sorry if we ever made it seem like it was your fault.” Bakugou said, eyes boring into Hiroyuki’s. Hiroyuki looked at you and you nodded to show you agreed with Bakugou.

“Don't ever forget how much we love you, okay? Now you should eat, we’ll get you anything you want.” You said wiping your tears with a smile.

“If it's not too much trouble, I want you and dad’s spicy pork curry and you guys should take some to the girls.” He said drowsily.

“But in order to make that we both would have to leave since it's a meal we make together… we couldn't leave you here alone.” You said mostly to yourself before any could say anything else a new voice was heard entering the room.

“You guys go talk and make him some food, ill stay with him. I didn't watch you guys terribly flirt and kiss everywhere just for it to end over some miscommunications.” Aizawa said as he took the seat next to Hiroyuki. Aizawa had remained close with a lot of students from 1A, becoming like a second dad but he had been extra close with you and Bakugou. When Kaori came into the equation he was like a nanny to her and it only increased when Hiroyuki was born, the two having a really strong bond so neither you or Bakugou was shocked he showed up.

“Okay, then old man. Watch my kid.” Bakugou said, grabbing your hand and pulling you away. You almost forgot what his calloused hand felt like. He drug you to his car and the car ride was mostly silent. The talking began when you began to cook in the house you used to share.

“Do you love me?” You asked as you cut pork

“Yes, I love you. I never stopped, I am in love with you y/n. Today I love you more than yesterday but less than tomorrow.” He said slicing onions.

“Then why did you say that, say that you didn't love me.”

“Because I could see it, you don't look at me the same. We don't talk the way we used to. I don't want to string you along and make you hate being with me, because I love you more than life itself. And I was scared that one day you would wake up and you wouldn't need me and realize how easy it would be to leave me. That it would be my fault we ended because I was so focused on me I didn't see your pain. Scared that I would wake up and gaze into your eyes and find no love or joy in them. So I decided to let you go… I was thinking we just needed a break but you suggested a divorce and I agreed because I would do anything to make sure you keep that beautiful smile of yours. Even if you weren't smiling at me anymore… do you..” He said calmly, growing more emotional with each word.

“Yea, I never ever stopped. I was just tired, I am tired. But I want nothing more than for us to work… we can get through this, can't we?” You asked cautiously.

“Of course we can, we are Bakugous, we can do whatever the hell we want. And it will be different this time, we’ll talk about things and communicate better, I swear. I aint seeing a shrink though.” He said flicking water at you to make his last point more effective.

“Yes we are.” You giggled at him.

“No we aren't, you shitty dumbass. We don't need help, I can talk about my feelings without some dumb wanna be life coach.” He yelled as he began to wash the rice.

“Well we don't have to but I guess that means Zuku and Urakara have a better relationship than us since they go to counseling…” you trailed off with a shrug.

“Oh fuck you!” He roared at you, you giggled knowing he would now go. This was the most normal you felt in months, the happiest for sure. Just maybe things would be okay, and who were you kidding you could never fall out of love with the spiky haired explosion boy no matter what he did. It was toxic in a way but you could unpack that in the therapy sessions you were gonna force him to attend.

[nightowlfandom]

Levi Ackerman- I Got a Dirty Mouth

Girl you better prepare your WAP...im sorry lol Also for continuity ....if you’re tall...pretend he’s taller lol.

CHECKOUT MY MASTERLIST HERE!

Leggo!

...

In a split second, you were floored. The wind was quite literally knocked out of your lungs as you landed on your back. A smirking Levi glared down at you, his foot on your chest. (LEVI STEP ON ME)

“Yield.” he spoke.

“Fine.” you glowered. You tried your best to ignore the surprised stares from the other cadets. You had never lost a fight before. You pushed his foot off you, rolling over on your stomach to try and ease the pain. One of the younger cadets, Sadie rushed to your side as Levi walked off, that self-satisfied look on his face.

“Miss Y/N!” she helped you to your feet.

“I’m fine.” you waved her off. “I’m good.”

“That wasn’t a fair fight!” she commented as she led you off the training ground. “I hope I never have to spar with him.”

“Trust me. If I get my hands on him again today, no one will have to.” you glowered. You were especially upset because of what you’d have to do now.

...

“This is humiliating.” you seethed. Not only did you look ridiculous, but the pair of cat ears perched on your head with an ugly unsightly bow didn’t help either. The outfit that looked like it belonged to a maid cafe uniform closet made you wanna hurl. 

“This was out arrangement, was it not?” He asked, crossing his arms. “You lost, therefor-”

“I have to be your maid for the next month. Don’t remind me.” you cut him off. “If ANYONE finds out about this-”

“Not my problem. I’ll be gone for the day, clean my office.” he left without another word.

“B-but it’s already clean?” you looked around. It looked pretty normal to you. “Did he mean just...dust around?” you look confused.

You were no stranger to the clean freak, but you had a problem pinpointing what he meant. There was a bucket of cleaning supplies at the door. “What am I supposed to-” you cut yourself off with a groan.

...

Three hours of scrubbing non-existent dirt but you did it! 

“I’ve returned, I hope my office isn’t a complete mess!” you could hear Levi’s voice. You were in the middle of throwing the cleaning rag back into the bucket when he had made his presence known.

He took one look at you, then looked around the room. His face was expressionless. “...Y/N.”

“What?” you dusted yourself off. You were pretty sure you smelt like bleach. Utterly gross.

“Did I, or did I not...ask you to clean my office?”

“I did.” you said lowly. 

“Really? Because it looks worse than how I left it!” he snapped. “You can’t even clean windows the right way!” he nearly exploded.

“WAIT A MINUTE!” you cut him off. “You wanted me to clean...and I did!”

“These floors are filthy! The windows look disgusting! Had I known your cleaning skills were a reflection of your fighting, I wouldn’t have taken this stupid challenge.” he spat.

“Now you listen here!” you stormed up to him. “YOU challenged ME! If I didn’t know any better I’d say you just used this as an opportunity to be alone with me.” you rolled your eyes. “I’m willing to bet the only reason I’m here is because you like me.”

Levi grew quiet as you raised an eyebrow. You put your hands on your hips and waited for him to speak.

“Waiting....” you said boredly. “I’m out of here.” you marched over to the cleaning bucket and bent down, attempting to grab it by it’s handle. Before you could stand all the way back up, Levi had somehow gotten behind you. You were surprised when he grabbed your bow and made you stand to your feet.

“I love when you bend over, L/N.” he mewled in your ear. He held the laces of your bow and moved your head to the side. “You look so good as a maid.”

“Huh?” you were surprised. The way he held your bow didn’t allow you to move. 

“I should’ve made you wear your hair in pigtails.” he grunted.

“Huh?!” you repeated. “Levi, what has gotten into you!”

“If you can’t clean the right fucking way then maybe you’ll be useful for something else.” he seethed. He let got of the bow allowing you to turn towards him. 

“No seriously, what had gotten into you?” you raised an eyebrow. “L-levi?”

“You’re gonna be my maid...but in a different way.”  he stepped towards you.

“I mean what else would you have me do?” you put your hands on your hips. 

“On your knees.” he replied.

“I’m sorry?” you raised an eyebrow.

“I said on your knees.” he growled. “I won’t ask again.”

Obediently, you lowered to your knees and stared up at Levi. “Now what?” 

“Tell me I’m your superior. Tell me I’m your captain.” he said. The way he looked down at you, you would dare say it was with adoration. “Say it, maid.”

“You’re my captain.” you whimpered. You began playing with your fingers.

“Hm, tell me you’d do anything for me?”

“I’d d-do anything for you.” you repeated his words. What was getting into you?!

“Do you want to fuck me Y/N?” he caressed the side of your face with his fingertips. “Do you want your captain to have his way with you?” His eyes were completely blackened with lust. 

“Um...I- I’ve never been with anyone.” you replied sheepishly.

“What?” Levi seemed surprised. “You’re a virgin?”

“Please,” you scoffed. “Don’t act surprised.” you still felt shy.

“I mean, I would think a woman with your looks...would at least have one suitor.” you could see his cheeks become tinted with a rose color. 

“Don’t have time for it.” you shrugged. “I mean...I’ve done things, with myself...” you trailed off again. “But not with anyone else.”

Levi’s eyes widened. How were you so casual with stating something so lewd to him? Levi studied you. You couldn’t look at him without looking away from him. You were gripping the hem of your maid’s outfit super tight. “So answer my question. Do you want me to have my way with you, Y/N?”

“I mean...I’d rather lose it to someone I actually like than-” you instantly shut your mouth. When you met his gaze again, Levi was smirking.

“Hm, as your captain, it’s my job to teach you.” in another swift movement, Levi had scooped you up into his arms. You were set down on the desk. You were forced to look up at Levi. “So let me teach you”

... (Hours later)

“So...” he began. “This maid thing...we’re gonna extend it indefinitely.” 

In an assortment of limbs, you two laid behind the desk away from the door.

“...If I must.” you tried to hide the blush on your face.

“And um...you’re going to be moving into my quarters with.” he exhaled. “Effective tonight.”

“Dually noted.” you agreed. 

“I would highly recommend you inform any future suitors of your current situation.” he finished. “It would make both our lives easier.”

“Right....”

[goineedsleep]

i am cursed, and also delusional

i got sick recently(not covid, i am a fully vaccinated bitch), so i'm writing this on caffeine and pain

i hope you enjoy the shitshow

-trials of octopath is todays awful fusion idea

-for those of you unaware of trials of manas existence, it's a lot like octopath(and vice versa). trials is a game where you pick 3 characters out of 6 possible options to play as, and the story changes drastically depending on who's in your party. im' gonna have to cut a couple of the octopaths to fit this AU, but i'll be putting them elsewhere- you'll see them eventually

-i'm not even getting into story pairs! every two characters in trials of mana has the same final boss. if you put two characters together who have the same story(say, the fighter/duran or the mage/angela), it gives more information on those characters and their shared story.

-we have olberic the fighter(replacing duran) first. after an invasion of his home, he trusts erhardt with protecting it while he chases after the perpetrator

-then there's cyrus the mage(replacing angela)- he is the prestiged son of a famed scholar. he cannot use the same powerful magic his father could, and thus is chosen to be executed by him. cyrus unleashes enough magical power to teleport out of that situation(this happens in-game), and runs away to seek guidance from the Archbishop of the Church of the Sacred Flame.

-now we have therion the thief. he is a close friend of the leader of the Thieves Guild of the Ravuses, a man known as Heathcote. Darius, an "old friend " of his, saved Heathcotes life from being missing. this results in Heathcote acting very weird from the day he returns- at least, if you ask therion. Heathcote has never expressed the want to start a nation and invade another country until now! he gets help from Heathcotes son, the doctor of their group, to find out what's going on with Heathcote. It turns out... that Darius is using mind control to manipulate Heathcote to follow his bidding. man come on therion was just starting to not punch you in the face every night just when you were about to fall asleep again

-Darius uses dark magic to seal Alfyn away to another realm, and frames Therion for the kidnapping. Therion can't tell the truth about the situation either or kill Darius- Cordelia, Alfyns little sister, will die as well if he even dares due to a cursed article of clothing given to her by Darius.

-luckily for him, Tressa has mercy on him a couple months later and breaks him out of jail. therion decides to investigate the curse in order to find out how to stab Darius in the most affective way imaginable. Also to save Cordelia, but that isn't his priority at the moment

-now we have the warrior princess Primrose

-she's the captain of the woman-led guard of the country of Azelhart

-her mother died during childbirth whilst giving birth to her little sister tressa, and so she decided to take care of her to the best of her ability. her father is very proud of her for taking charge like this, but he still is the parent in this version. he is the one that technically raised tressa since I do not want to force primrose to parent someone when she's like 6

-primrose was just a dedicated babysitter

-she wants tressa to practice her dancing, and when she finds her she's being held at knifepoint by 2 thieves. the barrier protecting Azelhart from enemy forces is broken, tressa is kidnapped, and -Azelhart is no more. Now Primrose is no princess or noble- she's just Primrose

-She goes to the Priest of Light so she can pray for forgiveness from Aelfric before she kills all of the Ravus thieves guild

-H'aanit is the princess of the werewolves. they've been oppressed and marginalized by humans for years, so they've taken up the forest as their home. she's a hunter like most of them are, yet she's never been able to harness the power of her bloodline: it may be due to her being half-human, but she's never been capable of transforming into a beast like her brethren.

-she meets the snow leopard Linde in front of her dead mothers corpse, and starts feeding it

-she has a new pet now -linde and herself work together and they sometimes do better than full-blooded werewolves when they work together

-Z'aanta forms an alliance with Mattias, a man who's worked with the Church of the Sacred Flame a million times -immediately following the forming of this alliance Linde attempts to kill H'aanit -H'aanit doesn't wish to hurt her friend, but she has no choice: she turns into a werewolf for the first time in her life and loses control of her thoughts in her despair

-oh welp the cat's dead(I'M SO SORRY LINDE YOU ARE A VERY GOOD KITTY) -H'aanit heads back home to cry for a minute... then she overhears Mattias admitting that he killed her cat -H'aanit attempts to attack him, and then gets yeeted to Jadd -good job ham, you complete and utter pokemon trainer

-last up, we've got ophilia -she's the adoptive daughter of the Archbishop of the Sacred Flame -she hears Lianna's gonna be going somewhere, she gets an awful vision of Lianna never being seen again following this mission, and goes with her in secret -Lianna gets kidnapped regardless by Mattias -so ophilia decides to find this guy and punch him in the face

-alright that's all of the character backstories

-THANK GOD

-all of these people(save alfyn and tressa, who is being held hostage by the ravus thieves guild) go to jadd first- h'aanit is yeeted there by mattias

-h'aanit notices that her people are invading this town and will be invading Flamesgrace- her next goal is to stop this -olberic wants to stop this as well, so he and h'aanit team up first

-Primrose looks for Tressa in some desperate search, and meets Cyrus during this search. they decide to journey together to Wendel, figuring going together would be better than being alone -they think it's a dumb idea to fight the beastmen, so they decide to escape at night like the bartender suggested

-ophilia finds therion at the bar while looking for food, and overhears his story while she eats soup and bread -she leads him to Wendel, wanting to do help another adventurer before she goes off into the unknown herself

-olberic and h'aanit free the town from beastmen and go to the cavern that leads to flamesgrace(which i am going to keep calling Wendel on accident because that's what it is in trials, srry) -they get there and there's a barrier -archbishop put it up to protect them from the beastmen, and then h'aanit and olberic find the lakeside town of astoria -the villagers keep mentioning how a divine light has started appearing in the area, and olberic shrugs it off and takes a very long nap. the poor man is very tired -ophilia and therion head there as well and follow the light to where it falls- ophilia touches this flame and has to fight a giant robot w/ therion -they win, and ophilia doesn't see it anymore -she shrugs and heads back to astoria, where beastmen have wrecked the town. it is g o n e -ophilia holds a memorial service for them, where she tells therion about how she's a cleric of the Sacred Flame -therion shrugs and suggests they keep going. they don't have much time before it's day and the beastmen attempt to attack Flamesgrace, too

-h'aanit, olberic, cyrus and primrose are having a picnic at the barrier when ophilia and therion arrive -ophilia attempts charging into the barrier, and then it sets on fire and they can all go through -after a long and awkward icebreaker, they all decide to travel together. it's pretty dangerous out there anyways, with the beastmen attacking and atlasdams rumored invasion of Hornburg. the ravus nation is also a major worry, therion reminds them, but they arent' gonna be in the area for a while

-these guys make it to flamesgrace to receive advice on what's coming next -olberic is told to become stronger before challenging atlasdam, and not to do so alone. he continues being in the group due to this -cyrus is told to learn how to understand his emotions- magic is not the forms they teach at school, but rather what comes from the heart. he decides to accompany the travelers so he can escape imprisonment by atlasdam forces -therion first learns of how the dimension Alfyn's been tossed into is inaccessible by humans. it is the birthplace of galdera, and is a realm of which sinners reside after they've lived their lives. Alfyn is probably not going to last very long in this realm- he's as good as dead -therion is then told of how ancient and deadly of a magic the cursed choker is, and that darius is not human. what he is is a mystery, and to save cordelia he must find the sword of aelfric. he cannot save alfyn, so he may as well save his sister -primrose is advised to find her sister and that if she chooses to destroy the ravus nation, aelfric will not support her actions, though they are understandable. if she finds the Sword of Aelfric, she may gain the power she needs to destroy the Ravus nation. -h'aanit is told that Linde will live on through her, and that Mattias is a warlock of Galderas. he has been rejected by the Order of the Sacred Flame as a result, though he does lie very affectively. to save the Kingdom of S'warkii, she must take down Mattias. and since mattias is going after the Sword of Aelfric she may as well accompany Ophilia and make Mattias's efforts worth nothing at all -ophilia is told to find Lianna, since she has been chosen by the Ember. she is now the only person who can rise the Sword of Aelfric from its resting place

-the Sword of Aelfric is hidden within the Sanctuary of Aelfric, which needs an insane amount of power to be opened. normally this power can be leached from the Aelfric Stones, but doing so could let loose ancient and terrible demons. therefore, the 8 gods that reside next to these stones need to be called upon in order to open the portal to the Sanctuary. -Therion suggests going after Aelfric first, since he's the closest one to them. after that, they need to find someone who knows where the rest of them are and also how to get there -they all agree that it's a good plan, but cyrus brings up that the Aelfric Stones each belong to a specific nation or people. going there and borrowing the gods power would be going after large civilizations that have grown around these stones -olberic suggests that they plan this out later, when they have more information and time -they all agree and go ahead to find the first of 8 gods

[vintagedolan]

sweet creature (egd)

ethan hates when he has to leave you for even a few days, so when he gets back, he has a little surprise planned

word count: 4.3k

warnings/tags: fluff, and then some smut to round it out WOO we goin through it today ladies and gents, harry styles (music) is involved :) 

dedicated to my bruna bby ( @ethanhes​ ) who is so strong and the sweetest girly I know. I love you!!

feel free to send in requests! and check out my masterlist if you wanna :)

Like hell you were gonna make another trip - you slid the last grocery bag onto your arm, ignoring how they were digging into your skin as you started your walk into the house. If anyone had watched you try to navigate your way in the door, it probably would have been quite the sight. But you succeeded, emerging into an empty kitchen, heaving the heavy bags up onto the counter.

Usually, you’d yell down the hall, summon the boys to help you unpack. But it would be futile - no one was home. Not even Sterling was around - the three of them were off on Wakeheart business, at the factory in Arizona where everything was actually produced so they could approve all the candle production.

You’d gotten a few pictures from the trip - bright colorful sunsets, Grayson and Sterling smiling from across the table at breakfast. But your favorites were the stupid little selfies he kept sending. Your phone buzzed in your pocket as if on cue.

Another snapchat from Ethan, this time of him with a metal straw trapped between his teeth and big smile on his face. Adorable, as always. 

cold brew mood. miss you x was the caption that flitted across the screen. You screenshotted it just in time. The next buzz was a text from him.

:(

why you screenshot

cause you looked cute

send me one back, I miss you

You rolled your eyes at that, deciding to make him wait for a minute while you started to put the groceries away. You’d only unpacked two bags before your phone buzzed again.

hey

show me ur face

omg gimme a minute 😂

im putting away the obscene amount of oat milk I just bought

DID THEY HAVE THE GOOD KIND

yep. bought three cartons

holy shit I love you

gray says he loves you too 

but I love you more

You sent him a quick snapchat to appease him, unsurprised when you got the notification that he’d screenshotted it. He always got like this when he was away - even more clingy than usual, constantly wanting to communicate with you somehow. You had to admit, you loved the idea that you were always on his mind when he wasn’t with you, even if it did mean you felt like you were constantly on your phone.

what else are you doing today?

idk might lay out by the pool for a while

without me? 😔

you should go shopping

You frowned at your phone, looking at the few boxes of pasta you had left to put away before you typed back with a huff.

I literally just got back from the grocery what do u mean

not that kind of shopping

fun shopping. like for clothes

The thought was tempting - with everything going on, you hadn’t gotten anything new in months. To be fair though, you hadn’t really needed anything new - you were just hanging around the house anyways. 

do you want me to go so I’ll stop wearing all your clothes

yes

kidding baby you know I don’t care. but you should get some new stuff, you deserve it! just use my card

I hate using your card

It wasn’t a lie. Ethan had gotten you a credit card linked to his personal account for emergencies almost six months ago, and you’d only used it a handful of times when he insisted. You never wanted him to ever think that you cared about him for his money. 

I’d be buying whatever you find if I was there, it’s the same thing

You grinned to yourself, plan already hatching. He didn’t say what you had to buy. You’d just get something small - a pack of socks, or a basic tee - with his card, and pay for the rest of it yourself. 

alright alright, fine

But his next text had you rolling your eyes. He knew you too well.

and you have buy real clothes. like at least one dress

Even though he wasn’t there to see it, your eyes squinted in accusation. 

why a dress?

you’re being sus what’s this about

you’re so stubborn holy shit. I was gonna buy you dresses for the harry concert so I want you to pick some out for yourself

Damn. You’d almost forgotten that the concert was supposed to be that night. Ethan had bought the two of you tickets back when they went on presale, using his connections to get the two of you amazing seats. E had been almost as bummed as you when it got postponed, disappointed that the night he’d had planned for you had fallen through.

it got rescheduled to august baby, we can go shopping then!

i’m impatient

omg really? I had no idea 

just go buy some dresses and send me pictures. we’re back at the factory, gotta go. I love you!

love you too!

Knowing that if you sat down you probably wouldn’t get back up, you turned back to the door with a sigh, grabbing your keys and wallet from where you’d just stowed them, heading back out to the car.

You climbed into Ethan’s Tesla, hitting your preset button on the door so the seat moved forward to where you could reach the pedals. He always insisted you take his car if he couldn’t drive you, always wanting you to be the safest you could be. It was still a bit intimidating to drive something so expensive, but you did it anyways, heading to the mall that housed most of your favorite stores with your mask on.

It turned out to be one of those days where nothing caught your eye. You really looked, scoured through the racks, hoping to find anything that looked remotely appealing or like your style. You even tried on a few that you had hopes for, but they were a bust. 

Feeling defeated you stopped for a while and got some coffee, sitting and people watching as everyone passed in their masks. Your eyes wandered to another store, one you rarely went into - it catered to your style perfectly, but everything was far out of your price range. 

But looking couldn’t hurt. Right?

That backfired as soon as you walked in, smelled that perfect fragrance that seemed to dust all the soft fabrics in the place. 

Before you knew what you’d done, you had so many options thrown over your arm that it was starting to ache. 

You stopped looking, headed to a dressing room to try and narrow down your search. Some of them were automatic no’s, the cut not flattering or the color clashing with the undertones in your skin.

But there were three winners - a tight green one that hugged your curves, a casual denim overall number that would look adorable with the right shirt, and a blue sundress that tied into a bow at the back, the fabric brushing your upper thighs.

You snapped pictures in each one, knowing Ethan would help you decide. Your bet was on the green one - he was a man, after all. But his response just made you roll your eyes.

you look hot as fuck

buy all three

no

yes

they’re expensive

I didn’t ask how much they cost. You like them all. therefore, you buy them all

it’s simple really

ethan

y/n

just tell me which one is your favorite please

if you don’t buy all three i’m just gonna go back and buy them for you later

or I’ll order them and have them shipped to the house

stop

getting online now 😌

stop it

placing an order 😌 😌

ethan grant

last chance

fine

im sticking my tongue out at you. you can’t see it but I am

ouch, im hurt

are you headed home after you buy them?

well I’m sure as hell not spending anymore money, so yeah. why?

just wondering where my girl’s gonna be. drive safe. you took the tesla right?

of course I did.

good. hurry home. but don’t hurry too much. safety first

You quirked an eyebrow at the last text - he was being so odd. He’d only been gone for two days, usually it wasn’t this bad for him. Who knew what he’d be like tomorrow before he got home.

Changing back into your clothes in a hurry, you put your rejects out on the return rack and carried your three choices to the register, trying not to listen to the total before you put Ethan’s card in the reader. 

You left the mall swiftly after that, trying to ignore the eyes on you. In reality, no one was probably looking at you, but you felt like everyone was staring as you carried your expensive bag and got in a fucking tesla. You never understood how Gray and E could walk around with such expensive things and not be fazed in the slightest. 

The drive home took longer than you would have liked considering the traffic you got caught in, but you just turned your music up, humming along as you crawled down the road towards your exit. When you finally got there you let the tesla take over, pulling you off the interstate and starting down the smaller roads that led to the house. 

Your first clue was when the song changed. At first you didn’t think much of it - you had every Harry song saved to your library, it wasn’t unusual for one to come up. 

But then, one verse into Fine Line, it skipped, the intro of Two Ghosts starting. 30 seconds later? Falling started to play through the car. 

“What the fuck?” You muttered, quickly switching off autopilot, afraid that the car may be glitching. It was only a few more minutes until you got to the house, and in that time the song switched again twice, all Harry songs. 

When you pulled into the driveway and put the car in park, your phone buzzed with your second clue.

welcome home baby

omg are you watching the cameras? that’s creepy as fuck

also the tesla just got super weird but I swear I didn’t fuck up your car

just come inside

You obliged, grabbing your bag and heading into the house.

Clue number three was that the pasta boxes you’d left on the counter were gone, put away no doubt on the shelf that you couldn’t reach. You froze.

Someone was in the house.

You only had a moment to be scared before Ethan appeared around the corner, your favorite grin adorning his face.

“Boo.”

You dropped the bag, running the few steps it took to get to him before you threw your arms around him, breathing him in as he hugged you to him tightly. 

“You guys weren’t supposed to be home until tomorrow!”

“Caught an early flight so I could surprise my girl. Gray and Ster are still in Arizona.” He leaned back so you could look at him, shrugging as if it was no big deal that he’d cut his trip short just to come home to see you.

“Didn’t you have stuff you needed to do?” 

“No, we knocked it out today.”

“Then why didn’t Grayson come ba-”

His lips were on yours then, catching your words as he kissed you hard, a hand coming up to your cheek, thumb running over your cheekbone. “Are you gonna keep asking me questions, or are you gonna let me actually surprise you.”

“There’s more?” The butterflies that only he could bring fluttered in your stomach, and you bit your lip, looking up at him. He leaned down past you, reaching for the bag you’d dropped, placing it back in your hands.

“Maybe. Go put on one of your new dresses, then come out back.” He pressed a quick kiss to your lips before he let go. “Hurry.”

“Okay!” You were practically giddy as you hurried back to Ethan’s room, laying the dresses out on the comforter and trying to decide on one. It took a few minutes, a few switches of holding them up to you in the mirror before you settled on the blue sundress, situating the big sewed bow in the middle of your back. It had a built in bra that was surprisingly comfortable, making it the easiest choice.

Shoving your dresses back in the bag, you didn’t even bother with shoes. You just headed straight for the backyard - but you froze in the living room, taking in the sight through the doors.

The sun was setting on the horizon, painting the sky a baby purple, the clouds a pop of pink as they floated, scattered around. The city was starting to light up below you, and the moon hung high above it. But your eyes were on something - someone - entirely different. 

Ethan was standing in the grass, wearing one of his nice pairs of shorts and a short sleeve patterned button down - you hadn’t even noticed his outfit earlier, you’d been too excited to see him. He was holding a bouquet of sunflowers in his hands, the petals bright yellow even in the dim light.  

He caught sight of you through the glass and immediately hid the flowers behind his back as he stood up straight and smiled like a guy coming to the front door to pick you up for prom.

You pulled the door open, stepping out into the cool California air. It felt almost cold against your flushed cheeks as Ethan looked you up and down, letting out a low whistle.

You just laughed, stopping a few steps in front of him and waiting for whatever he had planned. 

He whipped the flowers around with a grin, holding them out for you with one hand, leaving his other arm tucked behind him. “Happy concert night!”

What you didn’t see was the remote in his other hand. He clicked it with his thumb, and the whole back yard lit up. There were twinkling christmas lights lining the roof and wrapping around the tree to the side of the house. He’d brought out Grayson’s projector and pointed it at a white sheet he’d hung up - you watched it for a moment, laughing when you realized it was projecting a slideshow of the pictures you two had taken together over the last year. And finally, you noticed the speakers had turned on, starting to play one of your favorite songs. Sweet Creature.

“E-”

“I know it got rescheduled, and we’ll have so much fun when we go. But, I still wanted to make tonight special. So, it’s kinda just date night, but... Harry Styles edition?” 

Closing the gap with a few steps you threw your arms around his neck, flowers and all, so you could kiss him. 

“I love you so much,” were the only words you could find, and you hoped he knew how much you truly meant them.

“Love me enough to dance with me?” 

You froze at that - you weren’t much of a slow dancer, and Ethan had even less experience than you did. But the thought of staying so close to him made your heart flutter, so you nodded, letting go for a moment so you could sit the flowers down safely in the grass.

He pulled you back into his arms, hands settling on your waist as yours went around his neck. His fingertips ghosted over the bare skin on your back below the bow, sending shivers up your spine. 

It didn’t matter that Sweet Creature was a tiny bit fast for a slow dance - the two of you weren’t doing more than swaying back and forth anyways, foreheads touching, totally lost in each other. 

He spun you a few times, even throwing in a little dip that made you both laugh before he kissed you, leaving you a bit breathless when he pulled you back up to standing. 

“You bring me home,” he sang, slightly off pitch and so quiet you could barely hear, but it was so sweet that it even brought a few tears to your eyes. You blinked them away so you could see his face as you both smiled. 

The energy picked up a bit as the songs continued to shuffle, Carolina coming on next. You both jumped around hand in hand, looking like total idiots you were sure, stomachs sore from laughing at and with each other by the end. You paused a few times throughout the next songs to watch the slideshow, laughing at some of the pictures he’d chosen, remembering the stories behind them.  

When Sunflower came on, Ethan opened his arms again for a dance and you quirked an eyebrow.

“You know, Mr. Styles doesn’t have as many romantic songs as I thought he did. This one’s not bad though,” Ethan mumbled as the two of you swayed back and forth quickly, spinning around and around.

“This song isn’t even romantic, it’s about him missing his ex,” you explained.

“You analyzed those lyrics hard huh.”

“Oh don’t act like you haven’t dissected every Cudi song five times over.” You squinted your eyes at him in accusation and he just laughed.

“Touché, touché. Maybe the sunflowers weren’t the best Harry related gesture then huh.”

“I still think they’re beautiful,” you reassured him. 

“Thought it would kinda be weird to give you a watermelon. Though, I guess that would have sent a much clearer message.” 

The mischief in his eyes told you he knew exactly what that song was about.

“A little on the nose, don’t yah think?” You scrunched up your nose at him as if to prove your point. He reached out for your hand and you laced your fingers with his.

“Never.” 

And then he was walking, half pulling half guiding you back into the house, through the glass doors, down the hallway, into the bedroom. Your skin was hot, partially from the change in temperature, partially from the hands that were wandering over your skin as soon as the door was closed.

Ethan’s hands traced down your arms, fingertips over skin, then over fabric when he got to your waist, further down to your thighs and then you were gasping as he found his way under your skirt. His hands spread out, large and commanding over your ass, resting there for a moment, squeezing before he moved north, fingers hooking into your panties, guiding them down until they fell off and you could step out of them. 

Your fingers found the buttons of his shirt, blindly undoing them as he kissed you. You found yourself pausing, hands tracing over the new yet familiar skin that revealed itself with each one you managed to loosen until finally, finally it was open and you could push it off his shoulders. 

His hand found the bow, roughly starting to tug until you reached back and caught him.

“Baby don’t pull. It’s sewed, it doesn’t come undone,” you cautioned, barely pulling back, unwilling to put any space between the two of you. 

“Stupid,” he grumbled, pouting a bit until he realized that he could pull the fabric off your shoulders, freeing your chest. He hummed a bit in satisfaction, hands moving to squeeze your tits, and then he was kissing them, sinking lower, lower until his knees hit the floor.

“Oh fuck,” you squeaked, knowing exactly what was about to happen. 

Ethan looked up at you from his knees with a teasing grin and a quirked eyebrow, waiting for your permission. You nodded, trying to breathe as his hands ghosted up your thighs, up to your hips. 

And then he ducked his head so he could get under the fabric of your skirt, ready to get to work.

Your knees buckled as soon as you felt him, tongue warm and flat against you. One of his hands came down, tracing over your skin until he got to your calf, lifting it just barely and pushing it out to widen your stance.

You whimpered as he sped up, his satisfied hums adding to the sensation in a way that had your legs starting to shake already. Your hands dropped to his head, and you pushed the fabric off the top of it so you could get to his hair, tugging. It just made him go harder, burying himself deeper. You folded forward, bracing on his shoulders, overwhelmed as you alternated holding you breathe and gasping for air, squirming.

“E, Ethan stop, my legs are gonna give out, wait,” you gasped, pulling on his hair. 

He paused, ducking out from under your dress and smiling up at you, lips swollen and pride booming.

“That’s the best compliment you’ve ever given me I think. But I’m not done yet, lay down.” 

You did as he said, turning around and climbing onto the middle of the bed before collapsing onto your back, rolling over and looking for him. Ethan was one second behind you, crawling above you to hover over you then duck down to kiss you hard yet somehow sweet at the same time.

It was instinct to reach down to his waist, let your fingers ghost over his waistband, tuck underneath it in a blind search. He sucked in a breath through his teeth when you wrapped your fingers around the tip. He shook his head at you, making you pout.

“Tonights about you, not me.”

“But I want to.”

“Raincheck. Best fucking raincheck ever, but raincheck. Just lemme take care of you.” 

He kisses you until you forget your argument - you’re putty in his hands as his lips trail back down. He pushes all the fabric of your dress together so it’s just a band around your tummy and then he picked up where he left off.

“Fuck E, just like that, oh god.” You were squirming again in a matter of moments, his stubble rough against your thighs as he worked you over. He felt your body tense up under his hold, smiling as he gave it all he had, giving that extra little push that sent you tumbling, clenching, writhing over the edge. 

He peppered kisses to your thighs as you caught your breath, and then he reached up, fists closing around all the fabric of your dress.

“Lift your hips up,” he instructed, waiting for you to bridge up so he could wiggle the dress off over your hips. He tossed it towards the closet, moving back up towards your face, bed dipping down with his weight.

“No fair,” you pouted, reaching down to tug at his shorts and boxers. 

“And I’m the impatient one.” 

He stood back up off the bed, quickly shoving down the clothing he had left and stepping out of it. 

“Much better.” You grinned wide when you saw he was blushing at your words. “C’mere.” 

He happily listened, crawling back above you and dropping a bit of his weight down as he sunk to his forearms. 

“So missionary is the way to your heart huh? So vanilla.” He bumped his nose against yours.

“You have a pretty face, sue me,” you laughed, bringing your hands up to his neck and pulling him down for a kiss as he dropped his hips, searching for just a moment before he pushed inside. 

You’d lost count of how many times the two of you had been just like this, intertwined and enthralled with each other, but you knew you’d never get tired of it as long as you lived.

“I love you.” It came out as a breath when he bottomed out, his lips resting on your shoulder, back curled up at an angle that let you feel every muscle, every ridge of his body. 

“I love you. You’re my dream, you know that?” He started to rock his hips, unwilling to go too far from you as you clung to his back, relishing in the feeling of him on you, in you, all around you. 

This would always be your favorite way to be with him - sweet and soft, just your bodies together, nothing else. You couldn’t think of anything better.

He shifted just barely, thrusting in at a different angle. You knew he was searching, and you gasped when he brushed against your g spot, your whole body shuddering.

“There she is,” he whispered, a prideful grin on his face as he hit it over and over. Watching you come undone below him would always be one of his favorite views. “Look at me baby, I wanna see you.” 

You did your best in your blissed out state to listen to him, turning your head from where it had fallen against the pillow to look at him while he picked up pace. Your legs curled around his back, holding him to you, urging him as deep as he could go as you chased the orgasm that was building in your gut.

He stared at you for a few moments, and then as if he couldn’t help it he ducked down to kiss you, open mouthed and rough as he pulled his hips back, thrusting forward with more force than he’d used yet. 

“Oh fuck Ethan, fuck,” you moaned, holding onto him for dear life. When he snaked one hand between the two of you to find your clit, you were done for. 

His breath caught in his throat as you clenched around him and you heard the whimpers through your cloudy haze, mixtures of pleasure and your name as he came undone, hip stuttering and then stopping when he finally hit his high. 

Once he’s caught his breath he rolls the both of you over so you’re resting on his chest, listening to his heart rate settle back down under your ear. 

“I’m so glad you came home early,” you sighed, hugging his bare torso as he chuckled.

“Me too baby. Me too.”

[moonylantsovs]

Hi could i have a ship for teen wolf and the 100 or harry potter. Im a straight girl, virgo, gryffindor, brown hair, hazel eyes, 5'9, sarcastic, dont show alot of emotion on the outside, would do anything for the people I care for, Im very laid back and dont like drama and I love music and the ocean. People think im smart and funny:) Thank you❤

Teen wolf:

Theo Raeken

- you'd probably be a banshee

- you and theo were best friends before he moved away

- and now that he's back you're one of the two banshees of the McCall pack

- so since you were friends before he thinks it's gonna be easy to gain your trust and therefore the pack's

- but as much as you don't want to admit it you agree with stiles

- you think there's something fishy about him

- so you try to stay away from him

- but he's persistent

- he goes from walking you to classes and sitting next to you I'm every one of them

- to climbing through your window during night

- and at first it annoyed you

- but then the late night visits turned into movie nights

- and then eventually turned into make out session on your bed

- but the 'problem' was that he isn't even pretending anymore

- he actually has feelings for you

- that's why he tells the dread doctors not to touch you

- but you still end up the one in Eichen house instead of lydia

- and that's probably the only reason theo leads stiles to you

- because he regrets putting you in danger so much he's even willing to let the mccall pack rescue you

- you can just imagine his face as he watches stiles carry you outside

- theo's not stupid

- he knows about stiles' feelings for you

- but he also knows you don't feel the same

- at least he hopes so

- because in the middle of all this mess

- he fell in love with you

- after you recover you don't want anything to do with him

- he tried to come to your house

- but you locked your windows

- you spent most of your time with either malia, stiles or liam

- that is until you defeat the beast

- and you watch theo get dragged to hell

- you can't stop the tears for falling for two reasons

- one, you actually fell in love with him before you realized he was the bad guy

- and two, because you thought he felt the same

- a few months have past

- the ghost riders came to beacon hills

- when malia, scott, lydia and you came back from canaan where you were looking for stiles because of your vision

- you didn't expect for a certain chimera to be sitting in scott's smiling sheepishly

- and it takes everything in you not to punch him in the face or to lash out on liam for bringing him back

- but malia beats you to it and literally pounces on him

- after scott was able to pull her of off him you take a look at his bloody face

- "you look like shit"

- your words make him chuckle and for the first time in the last couple of months he has a genuine smile on his face

- you just roll your eyes and lead him away to clean his wounds

- and he can't take his eyes off of you the whole time

- "would you punch me if I kissed you right now?"

- "probably"

- "I think I'm gonna do it anyway"

- to your surprise he actually puts one hand on your waist while cupping your cheek with the other and pulls you in for a kiss

- it takes you a second but you kiss him back

- after you pull back he opens up to you about hell

- and how you were the only thing keeping him sane

- as you two kept talking about stuff that happened in the time you were apart you completely forgot the pack of werewolf with supernatural hearing were standing in the living room, being able to here everything you were saying

Harry Potter:

FRED WEASLEY

- you two officially met during the train ride to hogwarts on your third year

- you've seen each other at classes and during the sorting ceremony in the first year

- and of course you knew who he was

- he's one of the weasley twins, who were very popular in your year but you never hung out because you had your own friend group

- but when fred bumped into you while you were getting to the bathroom in the train everything changed for him

- he starred at you for what felt like hours until you snapped him out of it by clearing your throat

- "S-sorry"

- you didn't know fred weasley would actually stutter when a girl would just talk to him

- the thought made you snort

- "are you gonna move or do you want something?"

- he moved out of the way "Right, sorry. I'm-"

- "Oh I know who you are"

- he cracked a small coy smirk "So do I get to know your name?"

- "Maybe some day. If you earn it" you grinned and walk away leaving him to watch as you go

- truth be told of course he knew who you are

- he saw you as soon as you got sorted and sat down at the Gryffindor table

- you never spared a glance at him

- but he's been pinning after you since he came into Hogwarts

- george still doesn't stop teasing him about it

- not that he cares

- he never listens to his brother about girl stuff

- if he did he'd probably start talking to you a while ago

- george is surprised when his brother barges into their compartment and blurts out "I just had a conversation with y/n y/l/n"

- and he can't stop wheezing at his brothers stupidity

- he's been telling him to talk to her for 3 years and when he finally pics up the courage to do it it's when he nearly knocks her over

- fred finally listens to his brother's advice and decides he's gonna try to get closer to you and maybe even ask you go hogsmeade this year

- so he sits next to you at dinner with a huge grin on his face making you furrow your eyebrows in confusion

- you were completely oblivious to your friends knowing smirks and asked him what he was doing

- "Is it that bad I want to sit next to a pretty girl y/l/n?"

- "So you do know my name"

- "I have my courses"

- you didn't expect him to walk you to classes the day after

- or the day after that

- or the day after that

- but after a few months you were regularly hanging out with both the twins

- george was like a brother to you and fred was your crush

- not that you'd ever admit it to anyone

- when Christmas came up he finally asked you to go to hogsmeade with him

- alone

- not as friends thought

- his explanation wasn't very subtle

- there was a lot of rambling

- you found it cute and hilarious at the same time

- once you finally ended up dating no one was happier then george

- he'd third wheel occasionally but most of the time he'd leave you two to your date

- you'd help with a lot of pranks

- which landed you in detention

- along with McGonagall finding you two snogging in a random broom closet

[nightphans]

bicci outed, and it’s rowans fault (kinda)

{ read here on ao3 !!}

{read other chapters here }

it was all bliss’s fault.

bliss, the fucker, had convinced rowan to do a live stream.

rowan hated live-streams.

but well, bliss had been going on and on about how ‘content deprived’ the fans were during the hiatus. how desperate they were for anything at all really.

rowan thought it was pathetic; but he ended up doing the live stream, just to make bliss stop nagging.

if he hadn’t live streamed, this never would’ve happened.and he wouldn’t have live-streamed if not for bliss. therefore this was 100% bliss’s fault.right?

~

it was around 7 in the evening when rowan omandi tweeted he would be going live shortly, and it was at 7:15 when he actually started up. he was situated at his desk, sitting in front of his laptop. see, the layout of his room here is important. with his desk in one corner of the room facing the door that led into the corridor.

rowan always left his room door open, something everyone found pretty strange. a lot of people {{the author included!!}} had some weird obsession with keeping their bedroom door closed. well, rowan was the opposite.

rowan’s room was at the end of the hallway. jimmy’s room was located at the right wall with the bathroom facing it; on rowans left. lister’s room was further up the hall

he hadn’t mentioned to either jimmy or lister that he would be going live, since they were watching a movie together.and he didn’t want to interrupt their weird not date ‘date’.

rowan just wished they’d ask each other out already. he knew they were hooking up, but that was all at the moment apparently. which was fucking dumb, because the romantic tension between the two was driving rowan insane.

sure, this relationship could ruin the band.yes, it would be kinda weird. but dear god, that’d be much better than watching the two eyefucking all the time and being all nervous and shy around each other. it was sickening to say the least.

the fans asked questions about the hiatus,about whether this meant they were ‘breaking up’, about how long the hiatus would be for. they pestered about jimmy’s disappearance 2 months ago, about his ex-girlfriend bliss and what it meant for ‘jowan’ (he tried not to make the -_- face irl), about lister’s hospital visit. then they asked about jowan again, and he tried not to roll his eyes.

rowan answered some questions and avoided others for obvious reasons. when someone asked if he’d listened to the latest harry styles song, he read the question out loud and shook his head casually.

apparently, this was outrageous.and fans demanded he listened to it ‘right this instance’ because it was ‘ almost good as [his] own music !! (but not as good, of course)’

and so that’s how rowan ended up putting on the music video for harry styles’ latest song on his ipad. he tore his attention away from the live chat and his face on the screen for a moment to watch; he was fully aware the fans would be analysing his every facial expression in reaction. usually that’d annoy him, and it did, but he was too caught up in the music video to care.

he was too caught up in the video to notice jimmy and lister stumbling down the hall, limbs entangled and lips pressed together as they moved into jimmy’s room. jimmy’s arms wrapped around listers neck and lister’s hands roaming jimmy’s torso, pushing him back into his room and then closing the door behind them.

he was too caught up to notice the camera had caught all of that, and he was too caught up to notice the comments screaming in the chat.

‘ OHMYGEODUNDJDB NO WAY’

‘ AM I SEEING SHIT? WTF ????’

‘ WTF’

‘ AHHHH’

‘ CAN ABYONE CONFIRM THAT WAS JIMMY AND LISTER MAKING OUT W H A T’

‘ IM IN LITERAL SHOCK HWTFFFD’

‘ CAN CONFIRM’

‘ WHAT ABOYT JOWAN IM GONNA CRU😭😭😭’

‘ SO ITS BESN JISTER THIS WHOLE TIME??? LIMMY??? BICCI???’

‘ SOMEONE HAD THAT RECORDED ROFHT????’

‘ the way rowan is still watching the video and just VIBING oh my g o d what 😭😭’

‘ I KNEW IT !!!!’

‘ they hella gay...good for them. good for them’

rowan finally looked up at the laptop screen, looking back at his reflection. he was streaming on his laptop, but had the chat open on his phone.

“ that was awesome! everything was so visually aesthetic!” he smiled, pushing his glasses up. he then proceeded to babble about it. he didn’t glance at the chat until he heard a loud moan, causing him to temporarily freeze, before going to normal.

fuck, he hoped no one had heard that.he hadn’t even heard lister and jimmy make their way to the bedroom.he waited a moment before checking the chat, not to draw attention to the moan by immediately checking. fans would speculate shit.

his heart jumped out of his chest when he read the chat.

“ I JUST HEARD A MOAN OH M Y GODSDDD LISTER AND JIMMY ARE FUCJINH WTFFFF’

‘ IM LITERALLY GONNA COMBIST WHAT IS HAPPENINHGGGGGG’

‘ omg jimmy gettin that dicc bahsahahsh’

rowan looked back up at the screen, trying not to freak out. fuck fuck fuck fuck.

this happened lister, not him. lister was the one who always managed to leak their secrets, even if it was by accident. this did not happen to rowan, ever.

he tried to play it off, starting to talk about how this hiatus had given him a lot of room for creativity and writing new songs; hopefully it would take their attention away from the moan.

it didn’t.

it might have, if the noises hadn’t continued. but they did, and dear god, they were much louder. jimmy’s bed was beside the wall that separated their rooms, he knew that. but he didn’t think the walls carried sound so easily. he could hear jimmy, his childhood best friend, fucking whining listers name. it was more than disturbing, to say the least. it was more disturbing that the fans in the chat were fucking fangirling over this, or expressing disappointment because their precious ship was finally proven to not be real. if rowan could hear this, they probably could too.it was sickening, how involved they felt in his friends’,and his own, personal lives.it was sickening, how involved they felt in his friends’,and his own, personal lives. it was sickening, how involved they felt in his friends’,and his own, personal lives.

ihis stomach churned thinking about how lister and jimmy were having a private moment, and it was being exposed by the internet.

and it was his fault.

well, not really. but he still felt guilty.

he pretended to check his phone.

“ oh shit! my friend uh, my friend just texted me. she needs me to come over stat. so we’ll have to cut this short, sorry everyone! see you later!” he rushed, looking up at the camera.

that was a mistake, they’d probably be able to read the lies in his eyes. the guilt written all over his face.

he ended the stream with a click of a button, letting out a heavy sigh.

fuck.

should he tell them now? or wait for them to finish?

ugh, it was so gross thinking about how his two best friends were currently doing it in the room next door. he tried not to dwell on it, but he could still fucking hear them.

he put on his headphones and crawled into his bed, which luckily wasn’t against the wall next to jimmy’s room. he squeezed his eyes shut and put on some music, trying not to overthink ( that was jimmy’s expertise,not his,thank you very much). trying not to dwell on the consequences he’d be facing sooner than later.

fuck, this was such a mess.

people were probably tweeting about it now, it would most likely be trending in less than an hour.

he didn’t want to check yet, not before he had too. this was the calm before the storm, and no way was he letting it go to waste.

nope.

the panicking and damage control could wait, for now he was just in bed listening to frank ocean and laying on his bed on your typical Sunday night.

maybe if he locked his room and stayed here forever he wouldn’t have to deal with jimmy’s inevitable breakdown, the fans’ theories and invasive questions, cecily trying not to murder him (and lister and jimmy for being horny shits)

this was such a damn mess. but he could deal with it later, right?

[minsugapie]

Now You See Me: part 33 (2783 words) - are you still taking your meds?

• • • • • •

You’re a content creator that is wanting to change up your brand a little bit.

Yoongi is a faceless musician. Well, he’s two people at once. He’s Agust D online and while performing, but he’s Min Yoongi in real life.

Who will he be to you?

• • • • • •

PART 32 // PART 33 // PART 34

masterlist

• • • • • •

tags : @dixonsbugaboo @mayumioutloud @xlilybebe @pocketfullofsuga @pwinny00 @rjsmochii @yoonglemickdoongle @live-2-fangirl @cherryicy123 @vernooope @okaysoplshelpme @thebleuprince @minyoongone @original-internetmonster @princesskimnamjoon @waddlingmyg @ur-gunna-h8-ths @zombiewerewolfqueen @spookyricewithsoysauce @tae165 @sunshinedeaa @dreamcatcherjiah @tirednation @labgeek @lyndseygoregasmxo @luwunacy

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Ha ha ha ha ha ... multiple things:

- im sorry for this crap. after everything in my life, this chapter just couldn’t be done the way I wanted it to turn out. i wrote and rewrote so much that I just can’t anymore. I hope it at least helps with the development of the story.

- the next couple of chapters take place kinda throughout this part. you’ll get it if you don’t already.

- i didn’t pass my exam so school is all wonky now

- ANYWAYS — IM BACK, BETCHES

• • • • • •

Your parents knew you were coming to town, well your mother did anyways. You had planned on telling the father figure that you sometimes called dad that you were planning on spending an unknown amount of time at home, but you just could not find the right words. He had told you that he had better not get a call to bail you out of anything, so you just assumed that included your mental health.

Therefore, you didn’t call him; you called your mom.

You weren’t expecting her to be waiting for you at the bus station, but there she was, an extra coffee in hand. She knew that you needed it. You instantly went to her, wrapped your arms around her waist in a tight embrace.

Around you, there were couples kissing, people simply tripping over their own luggage, and children laughing. Although this atmosphere seemed promising, you were not excited for seeing your dad’s disappointed face once again. No matter what you seemed to do, it wasn’t enough for him. There was always something about you that he wished he could have changed. You dreaded the moment that you were going to tell him all about your job and Yoongi in detail.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Bub?” Your mom asked, pulling back from the hug and placing the coffee in your hand.

Nodding your head once, you were sure that you both knew that it wasn’t true. You had to deal with the criticism your whole life, but getting it from people who didn’t even know who you were took a toll on you.

“And you’re still taking your meds?”

“Yes, Mom, I’m still taking my meds…” You groaned because you wished you didn’t have to. You went on a little stint where you refused to take them but that was a disaster, so it was a collective decision to get back on them. You visited your therapist weekly, even to this day, and it helped. But there were just some things that he did not understand. He was the one, however, that suggested that you tried to fix the root of your problems —your relationship with your family and more specifically your dad.

“Let’s go home, okay? He might not show it, but your dad is happy that you’re coming home. The neighbours have also been suspicious about our situation, and you know your father, he can’t lie. So naturally, the whole few miles around us know about our familial situation.”

“He basically told me that he didn’t want to see me until I changed my life. I haven’t exactly done that.” You sighed and looked at your scuffed shoes. You weren’t going to change yourself for anyone, but it definitely hurt to not have your dad as your biggest fan.

So basically when you walked into your house, you were not surprised that he did not talk to your nor make eye contact with you. He barely even acknowledged our existence. There was no reason for you to stick around him, so you simply made your way to your bedroom. It had already been a long day, and you wanted to sleep.

Your room was exactly as you had left it, so you simply dropped your suitcase at the door and flung yourself onto the bed. Grabbing out your phone, you saw the missed call from Yoongi and messages from all your friends, but the only person you responded to was Tae, telling him that you made it home fine.

Only a few seconds after you pressed send, Tae was calling you. The call lasted a long time, mostly you ranting to him about the fact that your dad didn’t even acknowledge your existence, but it was fine. You were fine.

Tae had to leave because Hana was over and they had paused the movie to talk to you, so you let them go.

Briefly, before you fell asleep, you wondered whether or not you should have called Yoongi.

***

The morning after your return, you awoke to the birds outside and your horse looking at you through your window. You had always been lucky enough to have a bedroom overlooking the stables. You hadn’t seen him in a while, and you were excited to get out there later and take care of him like you used to.

Quickly, you put on some clothes and raced outside. Who needed breakfast?

On your way out through the kitchen door, you ran into your mom and dad.

“What are you planning?” Your mom asked, giving you a cup of coffee. You looked over towards your dad, and all he did was read his newspaper, glasses on the end of his nose, sipping his orange juice.

“I’m gonna go riding,” you revealed, putting on your boots that you dragged down from your closet. They were dusty but oh well.

“Gimme a minute to get my boots, and I’ll come out with you,” she suggested, putting her mug in the sink and walking to the hallway closet to grab her boots. You loved riding by yourself, but you were here to make amends with your parents, so riding with your mom needed to happen. Riding was so cathartic. It was bound to be a great day.

Getting your horse ready was such a calming experience for you. On the back of your brain, you realized that you wanted Yoongi to see this part of yourself. It was a thought that quickly came and left, but it stuck with you for a bit.

Your mom must have noticed your expression because when she was brushing Tae’s horse, she asked, “What’s on your mind?”

You bit your lip when you looked into her eyes. “I was thinking about a boy.”

“Ooooo...the boy you told us about?” The horse was temporarily forgotten.

A small smile grew on your face as you thought of him. “Yoongi.”

“Well what about him?”

“He’s such a city boy, but I can’t help but want to show him this side of me. I’m not even sure he really knows about this part of me, and I just want him to come home and see this. I want him to know the person that I am when I’m not doing my job and in the spotlight,” you said, strapping the saddle down. Your horse was getting excited.

You mom answered after she mounted Tae’s horse. “He seems to make you happy.”

Leading the horses out, you couldn’t help but smile wider. “He makes me smile and makes me want to love.”

“You love him.” Not a truer statement had been spoken by your mom before.

“I think so,” you admitted, giving your horse a nice pat. He was doing so well even after not riding with you for so long. Deciding that you needed to up the pace, you brought him to a gallop and sailed forward, urging your mom to follow suit.

The land was beautiful and smelled like grass and flowers. The sun was starting to beat down, so you slowed your pace. Once you made it to a learning between trees, you shrugged off your sweater and tied it around your waist, so you wouldn’t lose it.

“Mom, can I ask you something?”

Your mom’s eyes were closed as she smelled the air and soaked up the sun, but she still hummed in response.

“How do you know when something is worth it?”

“Be more specific, baby,” she probed, opening her eyes to look at you. You saw so much of yourself in your mom. Honestly, you were glad that you weren’t too much like your dad.

“I’m worried that I’m making the wrong decisions. I’m not sure if Yoongi is the right fit or if my job is worth all that’s going on.”

“I think your heart has to tell you. I don’t want you living your life based on what your father wants, if that’s what you’re worried about…”

“But I just want to have a good relationship with him,” you admitted with a sigh.

“He’ll come around. And if you want my advice, I’ll tell you. Although your job probably won’t be forever, I think there are a lot of doors that it opens up for you, and if you love creating, don’t let the fear of failure or the fear of your father’s acceptance keep you from your happiness. As for the boy…I know I’ve never met Yoongi before, but he seems to make you happy, and I don’t believe you’d ever date someone that Tae didn’t approve of.”

“Actually, Tae encouraged us to date. Yoongi makes music online and produces, and honestly he’s amazing. He’s been Tae’s favourite artist for years; whereas, I only met him a few months ago.”

“He also has an online presence?”

“Yeah, but it’s more complicated. So Yoongi does music under his alias Agust D and covers his face so no one recognizes him. But the morning that I told you and Dad about him and my job, we had decided that we wanted to start dating. And now I’m getting a tonne of hate from people because they think I’m stringing along two people and sometimes more because of all the guy friends that I have, when in reality, it’s just Yoongi. I haven’t spoken to him in a couple weeks.”

“Oh, y/n, you can’t let what other people say about you affect your decisions. If you want to date the boy just date him.”

“But mom! I don’t want him to have to choose between his career as Agust D and me. He really likes his privacy and being alone, and I don’t want him to have to give that up for me. Especially because I’m not special enough for him to change his whole life.”

Your mom slapped your shoulder after your remark about yourself. “You are so special, and don’t let anyone ever tell you different.”

“And then there’s the fact that his ex-girlfriend still hangs out with him and is trying to be my friend. She’s actually very nice, and I think we’re going to be friends.”

“What do you mean that he still hangs it with her?” You knew that your mom was trying to pry some more, and you would indulge her. This was the time for that.

“I am under the impression that she still likes him but from what I’ve heard, he didn’t ever really like her too much. I don’t know, really, and I don’t really care to find out more. Everyone tells me that he likes me, but she’s just so pretty and perfect and nice and kind. Maybe she’ll rub off on me…”

“Well, she sounds like a lovely person, but the heart wants what the heart wants, kiddo. Now I need to head back because your dad needs my help today. I just wanted to talk to you some this morning.”

***

A week had gone by, and your dad was finally talking to you again. Gradually, he had been looking at you and acknowledging your existence, but this morning, he had actually wished you a good morning and asked how your sleep had been.

It really surprised you. It seemed like ages since you last heard his voice. Hell, the last time that you had properly spoken was a yelling match. Your conversation was strained, but your mom must have told him about your chats and what was really bugging you, so there was a silver lining.

Within that week, you’d also been getting a lot of reading and writing done. You hadn’t told anyone besides Jade that you’d been writing, and she was the most supportive person. She wanted to be a journalist, so it was basically fate that the two of you became friends. It was destined to happen. The book that you started was a story somewhat based on you and Yoongi —something you hadn’t realized until just that morning.

You weren’t talking to anyone else, because you didn’t want to be a bother, and you needed a break from your old life. Jade was still a relatively new addition, and a female, so you just knew that she was going to understand and be of help whenever you needed.

Your mom liked you join you outside whenever she found the chance, and today, she brought out some lemonade and sandwiches for you to have for lunch. “Mom,” you asked with half a sandwich still stuffed in your mouth. Chewing a little and swallowing some, you continued, “Do you think it’s unhealthy that I can’t stop thinking about the one person that I’m trying to avoid? Even with everything going on with dad and my job and school... I still can’t keep my mind off Yoongi and how he’s doing or what he wants.”

After taking a small sip from her glass, your mom sighed and closed her eyes. Her hand found yours when she replied, “I think what you’re experiencing is completely normal. I never told anyone this before, but my parents didn’t approve of your dad. They thought he could never love and they hated the fact that he was a farmer. I went through a similar thing that you are going through now…only we didn’t have the internet.”

Later on, you were sitting outside in the sun, reading, when Yoongi’s daily phone call should have came in. It had gotten harder and harder to decline the calls, and you were sure that you were going to give in, but it did not ring.

You waited for a few more minutes, distracted from your book, but your phone stayed silent. You briefly wondered if something had happened to him. Maybe you had jinxed it from the talk with your mom.

***

It’s now been a month away from social media and your normal life, and you were missing everyone. Yoongi hadn’t called you since that day. You just wanted to see Tae again. That morning, as you were brushing your horse, getting him ready for your daily ride, you spotted your father at the barn door.

He cocked his head, motioning for you to follow him, so that’s exactly what you did. The two of you walked around the yard together in silence for a while, until he finally spoke, “Are you doing this just to spite me?”

“Doing what?” You were watching the sun come over the hills in the distance, waiting for its warmth.

“Your job, school, and the boy…” He answered, taking his hat off and pushing his hair back before putting his hat back on.

“Oh, those things…I want you to know that I am not doing anything to make you purposefully mad. I just want to figure out my life without following anyone else’s orders.”

You were surprised that he was staying so calm. Heck, you were surprised that you were staying so calm. Neither of you were generally known for your calm demeanour, after all. “I just want what’s best for you, y/n. I want you to know that. I’ve been thinking for a long time, and your mother talked to me…we want to see the grandkids, and I do want you to be happy, so I am willing to let you figure it out. I will try to respect your decisions. As long as you talk to us more often and let us know what’s going on in your life, then I’m letting you go.”

“I’ll tell you things, I promise.” The sentence was loaded with worry, and it was awkward between the two of you. Neither of knew what to do about how well you were getting along.

“So tell me about this boy, then,” he probed. You wondered what exactly he was trying to get you to reveal, but you decided to tell hime everything.

You told him that you were sure that you were in love with him. You told him about his subtle, caring nature. You told him about his job. You told him about Tae’s liking him. You told him about Agust D.

When the conversation was over with, you felt a sort of weight lifted off your shoulder. There was no hug or affection shared between you and your dad, but there was a small smile. You would take what you could get.

In fact, you were feeling so much better, that you decided to go inside and film a video.

However, although you’d made peace with your dad, you still needed to figure out how to not let all the hate and negativity that comes from being present online affect your life.

You were going home, sooner rather than later.

[stardust-revengers]

[Only you]

Bucky Barnes x reader.

I’m sorry I’m not good at titles skjsjsj

Request: Heelloo! Would you mind doing a Bucky x Reader where the team pranks Bucky into thinking the reader broke up with him?

Word count: 1.9k

Warning: lil angsty?? But fluff ends so dw, uhh also very very bad writing so I warned u

A/n: wowowo M’s posted three one shots in three days are we dead???, no I’m just in winter break so ya know what that means, anyways. I originally was gonna do a friends AU! (Cuz recently I’ve been rewatching it coughcough) and I was gonna do the whole “they broke up but then one ends up surprise proposal” but then I remembered how much I hate proposals so yeah, uhhh I literally changed it last minute and wrote it super quick so I’m sorry if it sucks!! Also! If ya wanna request shit send shit my way because I have nothing better to do 🤠👊🏼

___________

“What do you mean no?”

The winter soldier stared at the billionaire, tony stark before him with the at most confused look on his face, while the question he just asked still in the air.

“What I meant to say was,,,,no...you can’t take y/n out tonight because she….uh….because she has a mission with uh,, STEVE..yeah”. Tony’s attempt at trying to cover up the real reason he accidentally said out loud, yelled, the word no to something that didn’t even concern him.

“First of all stark you can’t tell me where I can and can not take my girlfriend, second, I didn’t even ask you for permission I was just letting you know we won’t be around tonight and third, why no?” Bucky just continued to get more furious as the conversation went on. Why on earth would stark not want them to go out? Him and the rest of the team were the ones who got Bucky and y/n together six months ago in the first place? And tony doesn’t even like Bucky that much to begin with so why now does it matter?

“Point taken, but like I said she’s busy” tony tried to cover up the real deal that was going on.

Bucky was to say the least confused “why can’t y/n cancel or something, she never mentioned it sooner, and I’m sure Steve will understand we haven’t gone out together in a while and I just want some alone time with her, where is she anyway?”

“You haven’t seen her all day?”

“Uh no actually”

“Huh weird” tony scoffed for effect trying to shift the subject away from y/n

“So how was your day”

Bucky slowly turned toward tony to face him his eyebrow cocked up and his lip twisted into a frown.

“What’s going on?” He asked

“Nothing, why? Why- would you think something is up?”

Bucky eyed tony as his eyes turned to slits

“Because you never ask me how my day is..”

Normally tony wouldn’t give two damns about the soldier, and frankly he didn’t like to admit it but he liked seeing bucky so happy together with y/n.

“I was just asking-“

“Why did you change the subject? Why are you hiding something? I’m a spy stark I know when someone is lying?” Bucky protested against him.

With having nothing to come up with and tony not wanting to spoil y/n’s whole “it’s our anniversary so I want to surprise him, keep him away for the evening” thingy, tony yelled out the first thought that came to mind that would hopefully keep the winter soldier to shut up for a couple more hours and more importantly away from the surprise.

“FINE ya wanna know why you can’t go out or find y/n, because she wants to break up with you! Hey I said it! She was too scared to say anything so she told me to tell you but I didn’t wanna because you are my friend” Tony’s lies build up one on top of the other. For a smart guy he could be pretty dumb, and Bucky wasn’t buying it.

“Bullshit stark, it’s our anniversary and she knows it she’s probably hiding or som-“ Bucky tried to reason with him even though deep down a part of him believed it could be true what tony said.

“I’m not bluffing, ask anyone, look I’m sorry man.” tony tried to fire back with a sarcastic comment but for once he couldn’t think of one, as he looked at Bucky straight in the eyes moving closer to him he saw the sadness overcome the man, he reached out to put an arm on his shoulder only to have Bucky smack it away quicker than lighting.

“I just need to see y/n”

“I- i- don’t think that’s a very good idea” tony knew he overstepped the boundaries and made this shitshow even worse but what came next for some reason was something he couldn’t have expected.

“BECAUSE SHE LEFT ALREADY” tony than covered his mouth with a hand mumbling some things of what seemed to be curse words under his breath.

Bucky looked down at the ground and back at stark for a moment his face was filled with guilt. What did he do? This is his fault. He wasn’t enough for her and now she dropped everything and left him. He should’ve known.

Tony saw the scene happening right in front of him and he knew what Bucky was thinking, he knew he should have kept his mouth shut, of all the things he could’ve said it had to be, “ oh hey by the way your girlfriend left and dumped you hahahah sorry!”

Knowing that the first thing Bucky would wanna do was collapse on his shared room, well ex shared room with

y/n, tony immediately ran in the other direction and contacted Natasha who was with y/n in her room gett no the surprise for bunch ready.

Bucky was blanking, staring at the ground, his mind was rushing with a million thoughts a second, all the reason he thought of why she left and what he could have done to prevent this from happening flushed through his mind, before he knew it a tear was rolling down his cheek. His legs felt like jelly and needed to sit down, he needed to scream and yell and ask y/n so many questions. But all he did was walk to his room to hopefully sleep this off and to wake up fork this nightmare.

Knowing he is too late to go find her and thinking she probably moved on already from him, Bucky didn’t know what was worse the fact that he didn’t tell her how much he loved her before she left or that he didn’t know if he even did anymore after she did.

~

Y/n was shaking, stark had told her everything, part of her was scared that he left and the part of her was yelling at herself for this dumb idea. Why did she even try to do this? Now he things she left, and doesn’t love him, when by god all she wants to do is hold Bucky and tell him how much she loves him. Natasha was trying to calm y/n down, telling her the situation will get better and they still have a chance to make this right.

The original plan was make Bucky think y/n was off on a mission and for him to come upstairs and find her there with a surprise dinner on the tower roof, but obviously that didn’t work.

Now here y/n and the avengers were trying to fix what happened, Steve was reasonably trying to convince Bucky to go his room and rest and therefore Steve would pull the “im with you till the end of the line, hey how about we go talk about our feelings on the roof“ thing, but Bucky didn’t want to, knowing he’d see y/n stuff in their room and just get upset all over again.

But what Bucky didn't know was that y/n praying she could make this right.

Nat pitched the idea of just going down there and just telling Bucky what happened.

“But that’d ruin what you were working for and your plan?” Wanda tried to explain all the reason why they shouldn’t do that.

Y/n started to think of anyway she could try to get this to work, but all she could think of was the thought that Bucky hates her and never wants to see her again.

“I think at this point I could care less about this damn surprise, all I care about is Bucky right now and holding him, and telling him that I would never ever wanna be with someone other than him, I’d die for him and sacrifice so much for him and he doesn’t even know how much I love him yet, and now I’m never going to be able to tell him that because I fucking messed up the best thing I ever had”.

Y/n didn’t realize how much she went on until she was out of breathe she couldn’t feel her lungs, due to breathing so hard, Wanda and Natasha bother pulled there friend into a hug, for what seemed like ages they stood there in the cold night, the wind blowing through the silence until a voice broke it.

“You love me?” The question came from a voice y/n knew all to well, when she let go of her friends embrace she met eyes with none other than Bucky Barnes himself.

To his right was Steve and tony they somehow got Bucky up to the roof just in time, neither of them expecting to her such a heartfelt speech they were expecting y/n to just run to Bucky arms, and all would be forgiven, but everyone could tell this root was unplanned.

“Buck...I-“ y/n started but let out a deep sigh.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t know this would go this way, it was all in a whole plan, I was trying to make it seem like I was not gonna be here for the anniversary and now I ruined it all and I don’t know if you’ll even take me back, because you probably think I’m so stupid to even think this would work out and you probably don’t even wanna be with me-“

Bucky let out a sharp breath as he took y/n’s lips in his and grabbed her waist, while pulling her close, the cold breeze of the New York night was chilling and with a mix of a deep kiss gave y/n a shiver up her spine.

The couple than realized they actually have to let each other go in order to get some more oxygen, Bucky hazed into y/n eyes. The two forgot everyone else was up there watching the scene play out, in that moment it was only them two.

“Doll, I don’t ever wanna be with anyone else but you”

Bucky confessed and took y/n lips in his once more, embracing her.

Their lips cut off as they heard an awkward cough coming from behind Bucky as the source was tony.

“I don’t mean to break this up but,,, you guys aren’t breaking up right? You two are like a thing again?” Tony, and the other avengers up on the rooftop with the couple already knew the answer to that question but they knew they tony only asked that rhetorical question to break the silence, and also maybe to somewhat double check he wasn’t still in deep she about the situation.

“You aren’t off the hook stark” y/n called the avenger out.

“Damn it you two, come on I let you live here for free cut me some slack, you two wouldn’t be a thing if it weren’t for me” tony then turned around with a wave of his hand and left the rooftop, the fellow avengers followed.

All that was left was Bucky and y/n they sat at the edge of avengers tower, looking down at the view of the New York lights and the beautiful city. Embracing one each other in the slightly chilly night Bucky held y/n closely, neither of them ever wanting to let go.

Mutuals I’d die for + taglist: @boohooiamthefool @moonkissedtom @aw-hawkeye @mc-universe @zendayacolemen @zenithzendaya @starksparker @starboyholland @one-curly-spider-boi @likechadwick @xoxojcanne @dej-okay @dtftomholland @screamholland @pietrorunsforme @beautifullydisconnected @fuckyou-imspiderman @the-quackson-claxon @the-quackson-brothers @hollandroos @hollyjollyholland @hollandazing

Ask to be added to my tag list/request something?!

[drimmolo]

Journal#1: What’s been happening until now and what’s hopefully gonna happen later

Alright so, I realize there’s been radio silence until now, I’m still getting used to uploading weekly updates on how my process has been going and need to realize that everything i do revolving this project is actually part of the process and not just ...well..drawings. I feel like I’m a little behind, but thinking about it rationally, it’s not that bad (i hope so anyway...have to make it):

September: I basically spent September just tinkering with the concept. I had been sitting on this idea of “a comic about me meeting Scheherazade” for almost three years, but I never really sat down and thought how to turn it into a full start to finish comic...so there were some holes here and there. More on that on another journal. Anyway, by the end of september I had a strong idea of what i wanted my comic to look like, and made some concept art and doodles.

October (right now): So when i first tried to draw the pages ..I got a horrible realization: am I representing the culture correctly? I realized all of a sudden that altough i knew what i wanted my comic to look like, I didn't know how the details had to look like. By “had to look like” i mean that...i mean I’m drawing a comic that’s tying to the Arabian nights am I not? I’m representing god knows how many shades of cultures..I can’t just come up with how Sheherezade looks like or how her clothes look like or show the creatures from the thousand and one nights look like...I had to do some research...I wanna do it properly. At first I tried to do just....you know...quickly search on google some images. But the more I scrolled down the more i felt like it was all from a western perspective....all the images i was looking at were illustrations from western illustrators. I then tried to scrap that and just look up...uh. old Arabian fashion? obviously i only got more unsatisfying results that looked more like outfit themes for tumblr girls. I was spending too much time trying to look for the right pictures....and i was getting frustrated cause I felt like i was cutting off my artistic creativity. I mean the comic might be about the arabian nights..but its taking place in my imaginary world...so my view of it is still important right? so from there I decided  the easiest way to avoid both putting a western perspective and putting in my personal interpretation: spending  A LOT OF TIME getting familiar with ancient eastern art and epic literature and from there get inspiration on how things look like. It took a lot of time and research, using museum archives and also borrowing some books from the library, but it paid off. Sheherezade’s clothes and design are much more representing of  her culture.

So yeah..october was mostly researching. I’ll share more on that later on another journal with some screenshots. 

Small confession: technically speaking I could have still kept on drawing...but honestly I was experiencing what i suppose one could call cold feet. I was researching and at the same time hiding from actually starting to draw.  This has definitely set me back on the process, but it’s not all for naught, since now i have no doubts about any part of my comic. I still like the thumbnails that i uploaded at the very beginning, and therefore will change the look of them only as I go, instead of just wasting more time on planning instead of actually drawing. In the end of the day I just...gotta start drawing. Which I have, by the way, and luckily for me it’s the research has proven to be useful. I’m not wasting time thinking about designs or how to fill space because I drenched my artistic “mind” with persian and indian miniature art and jewellery books. I’m just ...drawing and thinking about eastern art. I’m not saying im drawing persian art ...but im getting inspired by eastern art instead of a western idea of persian art...which is good enough for me. 

so yeah...not all for naught. Still stressing...but at least im drawing and thats the most imporant part right?

What’s next: I have 12 pages that I have to finish before in around one month and a half, which is not impossible. What I have to think about is how much I want to do in these 12 pages. At first, I wanted to go hard and color plus shade and light, but I have to think realistically now. At the moment, I’m going to stick with that idea. However instead of completely finishing each page, i’ll finishing the inking of all the pages, and from there decide whether I’d rather, in case, either give up colors or light and shade. Reastically speaking, color might have to be the ones to get taken out, simply because they take more time. With light and shadows I can still give a very good feeling of the atmosphere, which can’t be said about colors. Losing colors is gonna take a lot away from the comic, but it won’t take away the most important things. I have done a test on how only light and shadows would look like, and the result is not bad.

So basically, I have an emergency back up plan, in case I realize the time is short. 

Additional notes: A big part of what eats away the time I put in my comics is lettering. I don’t like writing the dialogue for my comics because it takes AGESS to get them to look right, but it’s my preferred option over having to type dialogue using fonts, because while i dont like writing dialogue...i absolutely ABHOR fonts. Luckily, during class we learned on how to make our own fonts and I think that could be a good solution. We also learned how to make speech bubbles on illustrator...but the process looked quite long and I feel drawing them ismuch  easier. Or at least it is for me, since I always draw speech bubbles first and then write in them the dialogue..which apparently according to my teacher is something not many people do. Personally i find it much easier...and taking into consideration how i wanna go about comic (with the whole inking and then maybe coloring and shading), i think being able to just add dialogue later with illustrator after already having the speech bubbles in the pages sounds easier than having to spend hours on lettering by hand. 

...phew that was a lot of typing. But that hopefully clears up everything that happened until now in regards to the process towards my comic. By the way, i can’t keep calling it simply “comic” can I? I need to start thinking about a name....

anyway more journals to come yaaay 

[shitihaveheardatwork]

new gig

howdy tumblerinos!

boy i sure went quiet for a few months there. the long and short of it is I got a new NEW library job with better hours. but better hours means... less life hours. so I haven't indulged myself in winghing on the internet about my job.

good news though! my boss is still a weirdo and there's no shortage of things to say about him!

in fact, the circumstances of my week are what inspired me to come crawling back like not-quite-dead roadkill to my angry little blog! so let's get into it

my boss the director (we'll call him Ronan) is a bit of a moody fussy guy. he micromanages, he takes things personally, and seems to fixate on minor things that don't really matter. I'd been warned about his attitude by all of my co-workers, but I didn't actually have to deal with it first-hand for about three months.

in addition to Ronan (who, for context, has his office right by the circulation desk: ie right behind me), there is also Luigi, my work husband. we hit it off almost immediately. we discuss movies and leftist politics all day. love Luigi. we do a reasonable amount of what could be called goofing off, but not to the detriment of our work. goofin is for when there's no work left. you get it, I'm sure it's the same at your workplace.

Luigi and I discovered that we could chat over gmail's IM function, and were discussing Luigi's applications to other jobs. He wants a different job, because even though he's worked steadily at the library for a decade, he wants to get away desperately (as does everyone here) from Ronan. Naturally, this is a good conversation to have digitally and not out loud, in front of Ronan's office.

but then Ronan walks by, and sees the chat window blinking over my shoulder. my new-hire honeymoon period with him is over, and he is officially in full tizzy mode. "You're at work!" he declares, before storming off to his office.

As he does whenever something upsets him, we can hear him hammering out a magnum opus of pissbaby nonsense into his computer. A minute later Luigi and I both have an email from him (cced to the trustees, no less) about how our behavior is unacceptable and that if it continues, we'll be reported to HR. Ronan then speaks with one of the trustees on the phone, expressing his concern that Luigi is having a "bad influence" on me. Like we're on a fucking playdate and not in a work space, working. We can't confirm but we're pretty sure the trustee he was speaking with told him to calm his tits, because we didn't hear about it again and he gave us the silent treatment the rest of the day.

BUT WAIT, THAT'S NOT ALL!

I have wednesday, the following day, off. fine by me. I was getting a tummyache just thinking about going back to work. I spend my wednesday doing some spring cleaning (fall cleaning), but around lunch I check my email to discover a fascinating message, which I'll just quote from here.

"Any in person questions, other than basic directional inquiries and Circulation related questions including topics such as: readers advisory, electronic resources, local history, genealogy, specific reference questions need to be referred to a senior staff member. Priority would be to myself.

This is not optional.

The same applies to telephone inquiries if at all possible."

Wow, I say to myself, that's wild. What's up with that?

Naturally, I shoot Luigi an email requesting an explanation. Apparently, in front of god and everybody, Ronan got all hot and bothered by a patron asking where the non-fiction is. The scene plays out as follows.

A patron comes in, asking to be directed to the non-fiction section. Luigi, being a librarian with a decade of experience in this library, knows the answer and gives it: "downstairs, on the left-hand side."

"Thanks," says the patron. They leave the desk area to go to the non-fiction area. But then, Ronan strikes! He comes out of his office on a tear.

"Hold on! It's not just "on the left-hand side"" he corrects. He then proceeds to handhold the patron to the basement and select a book for them. To be clear, they were here for browsing and not an explicit title.

This is already weird and stupid, but then it also results in the office-wide email copied above.

On thursday when I came in, many other employees also noted to me that I explicitly wasn't mentioned in the email, even though I'm the only other person in the building (besides the children's librarian) with an MLS, and therefore qualified to tell people that non-fiction is in the basement on the left-hand side. I hadn't perceived the slight in my original reading, but people who've worked with Ronan longer suggest that it's probably deliberate.

That said I'm not going anywhere. My boss may be a pathetic control freak, but he also has no sense of drive or follow-through, and has managed to foster a culture that's almost openly insubordinate to him. Beyond the adrenaline surge that results from being yelled at by an older man, I'm not scared of him. His moody outbursts seem to be the result, or at least a symptom of, an administrative and authoritative impotence. He only has the power I give him.

Also the town is putting a reference position together with the same hours but like... twice my current pay. So, fuck him, I'm hanging on for that if nothing else.

Anyway, Monday should be fun. That's the next day Luigi and Ronan will be in the building at the same time. Luigi also might have reply-alled that email and said that if Ronan enforced his dumbass reference policy, Luigi was gonna file a complaint. In the break room this morning they were joking that they didn't know whether to hire a referee or call the cops for the fight.

[theshapeshifter100]

A Superhero’s Choice Part 1

(Working title, it’s terrible)

Okay, I’m kicking this one out of the door! It’s not my longest, or even my best work, but I had fun.

Summary-After the incident with Chase Brody, Jackieboy Man, Marvin the Magician and Angus the Survival Hunter have been trying track down what caused it. When things start kicking into gear months later, will Jackieboy Man be able to save his friends?

Word Count-2,067

Warnings- Attempted mugging, mention of a stand off, mentions of Schneep being murderous.

Jackieboy Man stood on top of one of the tallest buildings in the city, slowly turning in a circle to scan the area. He alternated between using his x-ray vision and normal vision to get a broader view.

In a city this big, something had to be happening.

A panicked scream reached his sensitive ears and he jolted to face it, scanning the area... There! Five hooded muggers, one girl roughly mid to late teens out way too late. A little cliché, but it was still worryingly common.

The scream had come from a few blocks away, and Jackieboy Man took off running in that direction. He leapt off his current roof to a lower one, letting his knees fold as he landed and rolling back up into a sprint to minimise damage. He was a superhero, yes, but not invulnerable.

Once closer he jumped and vaulted down the fire escape, barely feeling the bite of the metal through his red gloves.

He was directly above them now, and even though he kept moving, he felt the stirring of nervousness beginning to build in his belly.

He had told himself a long time ago that this was a good thing. If he no longer felt at least nervous, he’d become too cocky. Someone could get hurt that way.

The victim in all this was backing away from her muggers, clutching her bag tight as she began to hyperventilate, terror written all over her face.

“Never fear! Jackieboy Man is here!” the superhero proclaimed loudly from his perch on the fire escape. Everyone below froze and turned to look at him, but he was already moving, gracefully flipping and landing with the smoothness of a cat in front of the teenager.

“So, who’s arse am I gonna have to kick, or are we just gonna leave it here?” Jackieboy Man folded his arms at the muggers and took a step towards them. One of them decided to take a swing, a sloppy hook punch as it turned out.

Jackieboy Man blocked it with one hand, ducked under the arm so that he was behind them and kicked their ankle out from underneath them. The mugger got a face full of asphalt while Jackieboy Man kept a tight hold of their arm before turning to the rest of the gang.

“Any other takers?”

In unison the muggers took off in the other direction. Jackieboy even let the one he was holding up so that they could make a break for it, laughing as they ran.

“Maybe next time you’ll think twice before messin’ with Jackieboy Man’s city!” he declared to their retreating backs before turning to the young lady behind him. “How are ya lass?”

The girl, who was perhaps a little younger than Jackieboy had initially looked, shot him a grateful, if somewhat watery smile as what had almost happened sank in.

“Thank you,” she half choked, surprised at how much she was affected by the whole thing.

“Alright lass,” Jackieboy crouched slightly so that he was at the same level. “Yer gonna be alright,” he offered his hand. “Let’s get ya outta this alley, huh?”

The girl nodded, gently taking his hand and following him back to the main street.

“I’ve gotta get back to ta work. Ya gonna be okay from here?” he asked, and the girl nodded, smiling wider now.

“Thanks again!” she called as she began to walk away, and Jackieboy disappeared back into the alley to get back up to a bird’s eye view.

 Jackieboy Man yawned from his post, walking around to ease up the stiffness in his limbs. Dawn was almost here and it had been a mostly uneventful night. There had been that mugging, then only one attempted hold up at a general store, but the police had gotten to that before him. That had been okay, Jackieboy wasn’t exactly a fan of being shot.

The sun was starting to wake up, and while Jackieboy Man usually waited until it was properly light before finishing, he was tempted to call it an early night.

As the thought crossed his mind, he heard a scream.

“Sod’s Law,” he sighed, half joking to himself. He loved his work really.

He turned in the direction of the scream and did a preliminary scan with x-ray vision before making his way over with a sigh. Not an emergency this time, but he’d better get over there before people started screaming about the zombie apocalypse.

It didn’t take him long to get down to street level and get to where the commotion was. He still had to fight through the fleeing crowd, but usually the bright red suit was enough to get people to move out of the way.

“Robbie! Robbie!” the superhero called out, trying to catch the zombie’s attention before he wandered off. This happened at least once a month, but thankfully no one had panicked too much about it. Yet.

“Robbie!” Jackieboy had found him, and made a mistake of grabbing the zombie’s arm. It almost detached from his shoulder and Jackieboy let go, trying to clamp on the shudder of disgust. Thankfully it got Robbie’s attention, and purple and white striped jumper wearing zombie turned to face the superhero, face splitting into a grin, gurgling in glee.

He couldn’t quite talk, but that didn’t always stop him from trying.

“Robbie, what are ya doing out and about at this hour?”

Robbie went into thought before his mouth began moving sluggishly to try and form a word. It seemed like it began with J, so Jackieboy took it to be his own moniker.

“Yes, yes, it’s me. Jackieboy Man Look, let’s get ya to Schneep to fix up that arm o’ yours.”

There was some confusion on the zombie’s face, but Jackieboy Man steered him in the direction of Schneep’s apartment. This early in the morning, it was going to be fun.

The lift binged once it reached the appropriate floor, and Robbie got out himself, recognising where he was and where he needed to go. His arm was now hanging limply in his jumper, only held roughly in place by the material, although it didn’t seem to bother him.

This early in the morning, Jackieboy didn’t bother with ringing the doorbell or knocking on the door, Scheep either wouldn’t open up or threaten to kill him, maybe both. So Jackieboy lifted up the half dead potted plant and pulled out the spare key. He then rolled his eyes at Robbie.

“I keep tellin’ ‘im to put it somewhere safer.”

Robbie grunted in what could be taken as agreement and Jackieboy opened the door, revealing the dark apartment. Robbie shambled in while Jackieboy found the light switch and he closed the door behind him.

Robbie got himself settled in Schneep’s office/makeshift surgery while Jackieboy made his way to the kitchen. He knew better than to get Schneep to do anything without a strong cup of coffee, and frankly, he needed one too.

The noise of the coffee machine roused Schneep from his room, making the German stumble half blindly into the kitchen.

“... Vhat are you doing here?” he groused before Jackieboy handed him a steaming mug of coffee.

“I’m not answering that until ya drink yer coffee.”

Scheep grumbled under his breath before taking a long swig of joe, Jackieboy sipping his more cautiously.

“At least you are not bleeding all over my kitchen,” Schneep commented. “Again.”

“Quiet night,” Jackieboy shrugged before taking a swig of coffee. It was relaxing around Schneep, when he wasn’t feeling murderous; he didn’t expect Jackieboy to have his usual swagger.

“You did not answer my question though,” Scheep put his empty mug on the counter and quickly reached for the machine to get another mug. “Vhy are you here?”

“Robbie’s arm’s come off. He’s in your office.”

Scheep sighed heavily and pressed his forehead against the coffee machine as it did it’s work, not moving until he had another mug of fuel ready to go.

“It is too early for zis,” he took his mug and left the kitchen Jackieboy following behind. Schneep was good, but this early in the morning, he wanted to make sure that he didn’t try to send Robbie back to whence he came.

Unlikely, admittedly, but the good doctor was a little, unpredictable, first thing in the morning.

Robbie grinned as Schneep and Jackieboy entered, seemingly oblivious to the doctor’s mood.

“You do not have to vatch me,” Scheep complained as he prepared his equipment. “It is not like I can kill him twice.”

“I’ve got nowhere else to be yet,” Jackieboy took another swig from his coffee and Schneep rolled his eyes before getting to work. Robbie’s jumper was off, revealing greying, half falling off bits of torso.

“Marvin hasn’t been keeping that spell up to date, has he?” Jackieboy asked Robbie, who shook his head.

“He has been doing some training,” Schneep informed, starting work on the stitching. “Zat is vhy Robbie is vith me.”

“Right,” Jackieboy looked at his now empty mug of coffee, debating whether to get another one.

“Go home Jay,” Scheep sighed, startling Jackieboy for a second. “You have been up all night, and ein coffee is not going to help you. Go home, sleep.”

“Sleep is for the weak!” Jackieboy declared, smirking at the doctor’s back.

“Keep that up and you’ll be deader zhan Robbie. Go home Jay, I have zis in hand.”

“Alright doc,” Jackieboy forced back a yawn before getting up and putting the mug back in the kitchen. He debated washing it up, but decided to follow the doctor’s orders.

 A few hours later, Jay O’Loughlin was jolted awake by his alarm and with a groan rolled over and slammed his hand on the snooze button, shutting it off.

He then opened his eyes, blinking blearily at the digital display, before groaning again and sitting up. He grabbed his glasses and shoved them on his face before properly getting out of bed.

It was daytime, therefore, he was not Jackieboy Man, defender of the innocent and hero to all. He was Jay O’Loughlin, programmer and coder. Not as interesting, but that was okay, it wasn’t especially difficult, and it provided excellent means to do something else hero related.

As he made himself breakfast his eyes drifted to the phone, but first...

He grabbed the landline and dialled a familiar number, the same number he had dialled every morning for nearly half a year now.

“ello? Angus ‘ere.”

“Hey Angus, it’s Jay.”

“Oh, hey Jay, nothin’ ta report?” asked the Australian, slowly turning back to Irish, accented voice on the other end.

“Nope, nothing with you?”

“Zip. Chase is doin’ alright.”

“Good,” Jay poured himself some coffee, and after a thought, some fruit juice to balance it out. “I’ll come down when I have time.”

“Sure ya will mister superhero,” Angus chuckled. “I’m guessin yer still too busy to keep an eye on Chase?”

“Yeah, sorry bro.”

“I’m going crazy! I love him and all, but the kid does not wanna go outside, ever! I might end up killin’ ‘im myself!”

“We both know ya won’t do that,” Jay reminded him, taking a bite of toast. “And we both know why you’re the one lookin’ after him.”

“I know, I know. Catch ya later.”

“See ya,” Jay hung up and put the phone back in its dock, toast still hanging from his mouth. He got a glance at the time and cursed. He needed to go soon, and he wasn’t even properly dressed yet!

Ten minutes later Jay burst out of his front door, laptop bag on his back and dressed in slacks and a button up shirt. Running a hand through dark brown, half heartedly brushed hair he began to power walk to his place of work, trying not to appear too rushed.

As he passed the nearest coffee shop and paused, certain he’d seen something out of the corner of his eye. He turned to look, but there was nothing out of the ordinary.

Six months ago, he’d have brushed that off, now, it sent shudders down his spine. It might have been nothing, it might have been his sleep deprived, caffeine hyped brain playing tricks on him, but he knew better than to ignore it entirely.

Shaking his head, he walked on. He needed to get to work.

A/N

So, quick explanation, Sean doesn’t exist in this universe. Also I don’t think there‘s a civilian name for Jackieboy Man, and I didn’t want it to be Sean McLoughlin, so I went for a similar surname (I actually knew someone with that surname) and a first name that just fit. I don’t know if Angus has a canon surname, if he does, too bad. (Fun fact, I looked at an Irish surname website and it claimed that ‘McLoughlin’ means ‘Viking’. Don’t know how accurate this is, but it’s a fun idea)

Jackieboyman’s powers I got from the wiki, I don’t have the patience to trawl through the videos he’s in to try and analyse the character. In fact, nearly all of these characters are my own interpretation of them.

Finally, there are 12 chapters plus epilogue. Not all the chapters are the same length, I did try, but it didn’t always fit with what was happening in the story.

I think that’s it, this is my first time posting a story on this site, so I’m going off of other story formats that I’ve seen here. If there’s any questions, you know where to go.

[bma-2020]

W/ONDERLAN/U/NDERLAND DIVERGENCY

            Now much of this divergency stems from varying factors, the main being: A: while the first movie had a good storyline, it didn’t delve as deep as it could have. B: obviously, certain actors have done some things so for my editing capabilities, i had to change his fc. C: I’m someone who very much likes to take a base and work beyond what i know the company would ever give, which is why i take the base of burtonverse and the game, as well as companion guide, and move beyond that. D: My blog is very much based in a verse where a spell happened and all the animals are no longer animals, which screws with people. and E: because ttlg was a hot mess on the major scale and as someone who half finished her own sequel to the first movie, barely acknowledge ttlg’s existence beyond regular whining.

            So in the essence of the changes i’ve taken, both for my blogs purpose to keep the b/urtonverse name… possible, but also for my own safety since i’ve dealt with people coming at me for something that isnt my fault, isn’t related, or otherwise just shows that theres a lot of uneducated adolescents on this website that actually believe telling people to kill themselves either for differing opinions or lack of knowledge on a topic or person, i’m severely trying to avoid dealing with those people. So this is a wild mesh of thoughts not put together anywhere nearly as well as it could be, but im doing my best with my limited amount of free time and non chemical thought process as i am capable.

            now nobody cares abt that stuff so lets get into the changes, rewrites, and divergency, shall we?

            Now in my Underland (Which I know is different from Wo/nderland, but i do still think having it not be called w/onderland was a stupid idea therefore my calling it wonderland is both shade and because i type it quicker) its been several years since Alice’s visit (probably a lot less for her, if even a year, Gina had this cool time post for s/yfy alice that i keep alive every few months by regularly reblogging it so I’ll probably go find that and bring it back again later. ) and there’s been a magical outbreak– things creeping up which had long been deceased, spells cast to make nearly all the animals humanoid (the horses werent lucky enough, and it didn’t effect ches/hire because chesh already had a human form, and the capability to transform into whatever he pleased to a point), and it screws with a lot of minds for awhile, but something about being humanoid felt familiar to Mally.

            Now, something which they never fully explained was how everyone knew each other. The game hints at them all knowing each other for awhile, many factors hint at St/ayne being a heavy influencer in the game, and likely having done something to the Queens relationship ( which, of course, was all dropped in the sequel because god forbid they give crispin more money), and i refuse to believe what ttlg gave us was anything close to what it actually was (especially with the lack of stay/ne, who played such a major role in the first movie that it makes no sense for him not to be in their past)

            this is gonna be long, and be depth for a lot of characters. A good deal of Stay/ne by my opinions and headcanons can be read on my sta/yne sideblog (illosovic) in his about, and that blog is mostly just me whining abt ttlg but whatever. Most else can be read here, but i will touch on st/ayne some here, too.

TEA TRIO

            Obviously the part most people care about, and with the face i actually chose for S/tayne, Sebby is not only one of the better actors to play a hatter imo (i legitimately only watched ouat for him ngl) even though he has done it before, i do feel like in the version i adapted from b/urtons and the hatter we had from b/urton anyways, seb could pull off the personality fluctuations as well as the insanity best. I was honestly torn on the alternate for a long time because i didnt want to use someone who’s played a hatter before, but all in all, who better to play a hatter than someone who has played a hatter and absolutely killed it.

            anyways, the actual important part of this is, Everything ttlg had regarding mally in the past, that shiz aint real here. M/allymkun was born shortly before the R/ed Queen took over W/onderland, after her biological father was framed as a war criminal, her mother turned her into a mouse, and abandoned her in a clearing the forest by Witzend, and after the King and Queen already died, and Mi/rana was set to take over. I actually see it as Mirana hadn’t been Queen for that long before I/racebeth took the crown, because the longer M/irana was Queen, the less sense the story makes in my opinion, which I will get into.

            Thackery is actually who found Mally, and that was after the H/ightopp residence had been burned down. Mally never learned about Hatter’s former name, at least not until C/heshire told her, because she never knew him as anything but Hatter.

            Whilst out looking for something that could be of help to them (Years before the Oraculum was found), Thackery came across a tiny thing left alone beneath a large leaf. She was extremely tiny, frail, didn’t seem like she’d survive long. Neither of them were sure of her species yet, but Hatter took to taking care of her. She was raised by the Hatter and the Hare, and much of who she is comes from the two of them.

            As with the fact she didn’t know either Queen, nor Sta/yne prior to Irace/beth’s takeover, Mallymkun never really came to know what the real personality of any of them was. She knew Ira/cebeth was evil, St/ayne was her lapdog, and M/irana was the truest good, because that is what Hatter told her. Hatter raised her, Hatter trained her, and the main reason Mally knew Miran/a could have the potential of acting just as bad as her sister was because she saw a moment in which Mira/na went dark. But she believed Mir/ana had to be the better ruler, because Hatter said so!

            Each held their own capabilities, T/hackery with his minor Telekinesis (often used only with teacups, but occasionally bolders as well.), Hatter with his ability to conjoin objects in his mind, as long as they were able to fit together (worked brilliantly with creating delicacies in food, something both he and Th/ackery could do) but Mally wasn’t like that. She had none of the gifts they possessed, which led to Hatter teaching her much more fighting techniques, Thackery as well, until she had to start teaching herself the rest. Her physical capabilities go far beyond that of most of those in Won/derland, in spite of her small size. (only grew stronger when she got bigger.

           Mally had once gone undercover in the Red Kingdom, which she doesn’t entirely remember. An accidental mishap caused her to turn humanoid then, and St/ayne quickly figured out who she was– hard not to when she looked so much like her mother. He’d taken to manipulating her, which she fell for for a time, even developing a slight crush on St/ayne himself, though she saw his true nature not long after, and more of a fear grew from that.

C/HESHIRE CAT

There actually aren’t many changes to the C/heshire Cat, or many additions I’ve made personally (my friends who write him do a far more beautiful job of that.) I do include the reference in the book, however, where The Du/chess views the Che/shire Cat as her pet. Whilst C/hesh doesn’t see himself as her pet, he does take advantage of her spoiling of him. C/heshire also wasn’t exactly effected by the spell, since he already could transform into a humanoid form, as well as copy others. 

THE RE/D KNAVE 

Il/osovic S/tayne, has the most changes I’ve made next to mally. Mostly due to the fact that his character, in my opinion, was extremely underused. With all the hints and inferences made for his character, they didn’t really deliver. He could easily have been the real main villain, much of what happened could easily have been caused by him, much of which I have here, though I do have to make edits to that. 

Mainly, I view Sta/yne as the whistleblower. he purposely ensured the rift already forming between the siblings grew worse, he set them up against each other, he was behind every bit of the plot, or encouraged it forward, just to ensure he had a shot at whichever queen became superior. He lost with M/irana, he wasn’t going to lose with Irace/beth. He couldn’t stand being around Ir/acebeth, but like hell was he gonna let her know that. He’d flirt, he’d manipulate, and he’d slyly degrade her until she felt like she needed him. He emotionally manipulated her to the point he was in control, and he wasn’t planning on letting that control slide.

He was also, at one point, friends with Hatter. St/ayne was a poor boy growing up, but Ta/rrant hardly judged him, but as St/ayne grew bigger, jealousy over how his sister was treated with love, whilst his mother harmed him, his brother was popular and he was ignored, and his growing desire to gain so much power, nobody could hurt him again, that forged a rift in their friendship. By the time they were adults, and Sta/yne already hurt M/irana, he encouraged the destruction of Hatter’s village and family, shattering whatever bond they formed as kids, as well as ensuring Hatter knew what pain was. Something, he felt, he did not know.

WHI/TE RABBIT

Whi/te Rabbit, by contrast, is starkly different. M/cTwisp is an agent of Time, fulfilling his role as the guide to Alice, and M/cTwisp is likely older than most others– though, in some situations, he hardly realizes it himself. His only responsibility is to guide Alice to her destiny, each time the clock turns. Sometimes, when a new Alice is born, he forgets himself, practically reborn in the moment. He’s a stopwatch given to him by Time itself, allowing M/cTwisp to temporarily freeze Time in a moment to accomplish a task, and the time traversement of Wonderland’s portals through other realms (many of which transfere through M/cTwisps own halls), Time never passes for M/cTwisp. Not in the sense it does for others. Whilst months would pass for a normal creature who left Wonderland and returned a week later, hardly a day would pass for M/cTwisp. Time always occurs as a constant for him, no matter how it occurs for others. He is also capable of traversing to exact points in Upperland’s time should he need to. 

MOCK TURTLE

    An extremely apathetic man, the Mock Turtle was never entirely a turtle, and never entirely anything else. He longed for the days he was in the sea, until he was cursed to live between lands. A ‘teacher’ in a way, though his version of school far different than others are accustomed to. He ‘taught’ the Queens, but eventually was sent off back to the sea by the King for disrespecting M/irana during a lecture, mostly for stating she hadn’t the heart to be a Queen, she barely had the heart to swim in the sea. He had been particularly kind to Ira/cebeth, however.

THE CATERPILLAR

A//bsolem, the wise. Many view him as the all knowing in Wonderland, yet many still only hear him talk in riddles and puzzles. Mallymkun really hates the way he talks, tbh. She hates how he makes a point to make it so you have to figure something out on your own. But, she likes how his words can be taken wrong and prove her point, even if her point is actually wrong. 

DODO BIRD

Uilleam held full belief in Alice, and, after narrowly escaping the Jub Jub bird, would later return to his post as a mentor in the W/hite Queen’s court. A nobleman, he’s seen as wise, often kind, though he holds the mentality that nobody should have to lose for one to win– something that kept him from fighting in the war at the start. He is extremely good with kids, but many adults tend to dislike him, except when he takes their side. In certain situations, however, he will state that there needs to be a winner, which is what led to him finally taking part in the resistance, and helping to take the R/ed Queen down. 

BAYARD

The most loyal of beings, Ba/yard was forced to serve the R/ed Queen for a great deal of time, but only so he could protect his wife and pups. M/allymkun used him as a sort of horse due to her size at the time, and he hadn’t minded. Often, he comes over to Mally, acting much like a father figure to her, as he does on occasion with Alice. Ba/yard cares far more for people than he likely should, but would risk anyone else for the safety of his kids and wife, whom he holds in the highest of regards. 

THE QUEENS

The tart thing was the stupidest thing i’ve ever seen, i’m just pointing that out right now. I believe there was a rift long before any incident. I/racebeth’s accident wasn’t M/irana’s fault, and M/irana never meant to be malicious to her sister. Ira/cebeth was spoiled when she was young, but when M/irana was born, most of her parents attention went to her– and I/racebeth was left mostly to her tutors, trying to raise her to being a good queen. 

S/tayne was initially attracted to M/irana, though he played nice with both princesses. When they were younger, S/tayne had started courting M/irana– though, it was kept private, the lowly stable boy (though, eventually gaining a promotion to a knight, with the held of M/irana) being considered too lowly for a princess. Though, S/tayne often had a wandering eye, and betrayed M/irana– which led to her lashing out on him, and causing his loss of an eye.

He kept his position, having glamored his way into the hearts of the princesses parents (a gift which ran in his family– he could bewitch and charm others into falling in a form of love with him, trick them into adoring him, manipulate to new bounds.) M/irana never trusted him again. The eye was ruled as an accident on assignment, and the rumors of Mi/rana’s mistreatment of a man she wasn’t officially with (S/tayne, spreading the rumor that a woman flirted with him, and whilst he hadn’t responded, the disastardly princess was so filled with jealously over not getting her way for once, she harmed him for it. ) grew, and he ensured I/racebeth would learn his version. 

I/racebeth, already feeling emotional distraught from her parents, became an easier target for S/tayne. When their parents died ,and M/irana was labeled next in line, S/tayne took it as a chance to send Ir/acebeth into a fit of rage, and have her J/abberwocky attack the H/ightopp clan, taking the crown and becoming the Queen. He also whispered the rumors of infidelity of I/racebeth’s husband to her people, ensuring Ir/acebeth would hear of the faults. The Red K/ing’s demise being an aftereffect of St/ayne ensuring Ira/cebeth thought he cheated on her with M/irana, an ultimate crime, and S/tayne made sure he was there to pick up the pieces. His adoring of her keeping his place held high, and ensured he got his way.

ALICE

breathes in, breathes out, M/ALLYMKUN DOESNT HATE ALICE!!!! NOT IN THE JEALOUSY SENSE!!! In fact, Mally’s distaste for Alice goes far beyond the stupid jealousy people think it’s about. Because, don’t forget, when Hatter said Alice was the right Alice, her treatment of Alice instantly changed– she was nice to her, she answered her questions, it was when Hatter’s life was put at risk because of Alice that Mally treated her badly again.

In the sense of my blog (and, when Mally first unlocks her powers, mostly) Alice had finally come back. Hatter missed her, and she left without a second thought. Mally didn’t like how Hatter perked up at Alice’s return, she hated how he suddenly started caring more for her than his friends, in her sights. 

She wasn’t jealous, Mally might have been in love with Tare, but she didn’t care if he didn’t fall in love with her. For flips sake, she stated directly that she thought he had a thing for M/irana, and seemed all dreamy about the idea.  You know she was shipping whitehats. 

But, Alice was just a child when Mally first saw her. Mally was training all her life to be a hero, she wanted to be the one to save Wonderland, then they found the o/raculum– and Alice was the labeled hero. Alice, upon returning, didn’t want to be the hero, and Mally hated that fact.

Mally was afraid, but she jumped at the chance to take Alice’s place as the hero. But she wasn’t allowed, she couldn’t save the world, that was Alice’s responsibility. 

And Alice only killed one creature.

And she was the hero.

Mally trained all her life for that, and she was pushed aside for Alice. Mally had been with Hatter through her entire life, she’d seen him at his lowest (including a time he couldn’t control his own actions anymore, an older headcanon of mine where he had accidentally hurt her because of his swings, which is what caused him to become so guilt ridden, he started being able to more easily be pulled from that state of mind– he didn’t want to hurt his friends ever again.) M/allymkun loved Hatter through everything, she never left him, she never left her friends, she stayed with them and she did everything she could to save them. 

But Alice was he hero.

And when Alice comes back again years later, and they’re faced against S/tayne again, Mally’s put in mortal danger.

But Hatter goes to Alice first.

not because he thinks she’s more important, Hatter weighed in the options, he thought Mally would be able to pull herself out of trouble, but Alice might not be able to. He went to Alice because he didn’t think she could save herself like Mally could. But that caused Mally to fall, and disappear for weeks while people thought she was dead. This is what broke the spell her mother placed on her, blocking her powers from being used, and keeping the rest of her family from being able to find her, but she was left abandoned, alone, and in pain, because Alice came first.

And Alice, thinking with her worlds point of view instead of theirs, thought Mally couldn’t have survived the fall. There wasn’t a way she could have lived from where she fell, and no way she could have gotten out of the water.

Mally thought they didn’t bother to look, but their search efforts were pointless.

She came back, she found out Alice said something, and she thinks her pain is Alice’s fault. If Alice wasn’t around, they could have found another way to defeat I/racebeth, they could have wom another way. Any Mally wouldn’t have had to experience pain.

Then there was the fact the marks of her father’s bloodline started appearing on her skin, marks remembered belonging to a clan that tried to destroy the royalty. Up until her father (whom nobody knows was her father), who fought for the King, was his greatest warrior, and was set to marry either M/irana or I/racebeth. He hadn’t, and her mother framed him to have killed the King and Queen. He disappeared, and the family was forever seen to be a collection of traitors.

Mally didn’t know any of that, she can’t even read to learn about further history beyond I/racebeth’s betrayal. 

People treated her differently, and she could only hold Alice responsible for that. 

Mally doesn’t hate Alice because she’s jealous of her and Hatter, she’s pissed off that Alice was (accidentally) the cause of her pain, and thinks that if Alice weren’t around, she wouldn’t have had to suffer at all.

Though, certain things started the second Mally became a humanoid– her eyes were different, but the resemblance to her mother was too strong to be ignored. It was pretty clear she was Feina’s daughter, especially to M/irana and I/racebeth– they had to see it, because they grew up with Feina, and spent a fair bit of time under her care. 

THE D/UCHESS

The D/uchess was a childhood friend of the Princesses, thought she wasn’t a royal at the time. Her mother was the former Duchess, and her father had died at a young age, shortly after her younger brother, I/losovic was born. Their mother treated her and her brother with great care, but I/losovic was treated with terrors– often beaten, no matter what he did. This was due to the work their mother took up to keep them in position, even if they no longer were wealthy as they were. Allergies were formed which led to a great deal of violence on their mothers part, and I/losovic held the closest range to her. 

Upon becoming a Duchess herself, she was always kind and well treated. C/heshire being a dear friend of hers, whom she considered her dear pet. Often she’d treat him to the greatest of delights. 

However, her friendship with the Queens had shattered overtime, due to I/losovic ensuring she held some form of hardship– he tricked the siblings into believing her horrid and evil, trying to tear the titles from their hands and steal their father from their mother. The D/uchess was banished, once the R/ed Queen took control, though she never took full stride in it. The only one who knows her whereabouts is C/heshire. 

MALLYS EXTENDED FAMILY

Her biological father, Vas Moraj. He is Gethris younger half brother, and is known to be the strongest, and most strange member of their family. The Moraj line was long known to be filled with traitors to the court, but Vas wanted to protect the royalty. He was the child of Fate, and though not exactly a deity himself, did possess far stronger powers than the rest of his family. He’d fallen in love with Feina in his youth, and had an affair with her,which led to Miseris and Mallymkun. He also raised her elder children, Seracien and Torielle, as his own. He wasn’t around when Mally and Mason were born, though, as Feina had trapped him in a pocket universe, to keep him out of her way. 

Feina Laquer Morae, an extremely powerful sorceress. She was only around 20 or so years older than the Queens, and being Wonderlands slowed aging, appeared around their age most of her life. She trained Mirana briefly in magic arts, and always tried to encourage Iracebeth not to let go of her title, that she could be the greatest queen of all, so long as she didn’t take no for an answer. A creature of chaos, and an empath, Feina held the power to force horrid memories back on a person, to force emotions on someone through touch, and held telepathy and telekinesis, among other things.  Her powers hadn’t transferred to Mallymkun nearly as much as her looks– out of all four of her children, Mallymkun held the greatest resemblance to her. 

Miseris, or Mason, for short, was raised by his uncle (whom he believed to be his father), Gethris. He was raised with the impression that his cousins, Jynx and Hayze, were his sisters, but over time, as his powers over the mind increased, he came to learn the truth. Especially when he met his elder half siblings (half cousins), and Seracien told him the truth. The rest, Mason worked out for himself, and he knew two things for sure– he was going to be one of the strongest members of his family, and when Mallymkun grew her powers, their powers combined could make them deities. 

Gethris horribly mistreated his own children, manipulating them into his own persnoal servants, and he hadn’t done much better with Miseris. Gethris partnered with Feina to destroy Vas, which feina agreed once she learned Vas was intending on denying the King’s wishes, so he could marry Feina instead of the princess. Gethris only got his hands on one of the twins, however, as Feina betrayed her half of the deal before he betrayed her. A spell was placed on Mallymkun, which kept her powers hidden away, her appearance altered into a mouse-like form, and her overall existence from Gethris knowledge or ability to find. As Gethris lost his powers centuries before, he planned on using Vas children to fulfill the prophecy– for their family to ascend– only he intended on taking Miseris and Mallymkun’s powers for himself, and destroy the rest of Wonderland.

When Gethris had gotten ahold of Mally, he tortured her in attempts to unlock all of her power. Miseris eventually let her out, and she ran off, Though, Gethris is always searching, and didn’t plan to stop.

TIME, SPACE, FATE (not pictured)

each their own being. Fate defines the future, Time controls itself, and Space alters and holds between each realm. Fate chose to enhance the Moraj family through leaving a piece of themself in Vas, and create the prophecy regarding Mallymkun and Miseris. 

Time is seen more as a neutral character, caring about securing itself through the world, and keeping fate’s reign.

space is above itself, but fate decides the ultimate. 

I do have a lot of other characters and info, but that can be saved for a …shorter post…

[surviveatitlan]

Episode 3 - I’m Literally Googling How to Protect Myself From Hexes - Francie

Francie

I'm literally googling how to protect myself from hexes

Yep!! Two tribes of 9!! I know a ton of ppl on this tribe so that should help but like, I still gotta be careful lmao. I'm gonna try not to work too closely with Emily because I don't want to hear any bs about "premades" like the last game we played together

i am literally hosting/was hosting (in tim's case) half this tribe + emily is my cohost rn wtfffff omg

Tim

So everything was going goood in my old tribe and all of a sudden we SWAP? I was not readyyyy. Like we were gonna rule the game as a tribe of 5. Tolimàn was robbed by one point yall.

Francie

the original acatenango peeps (the aca tacos) are trying to get tim and autumn to work with us rn so lets hope we can get this group together and have it be solid. autumn has no og tribemates left so that might help us. people to be wary of: heather and emily, both individually and as a duo bc I know that they adore each other so I can totally see them being a duo I gotta downplay my attachment to the aca tacos, esp my ride or die olivia

Allan

I'm really glad this swap happened. I really didn't feel accepted by my first tribe and I know if we went to Tribal, I'd most likely be out. Now I have the chance to make new allies. My strategy is to tell them that I didn't bond with my old tribe at all and hope that they see me as an opportunity for an alliance.

Tim

Me after seeing this challenge: https://confsnavarino.tumblr.com/post/171111635506 ITS ACTUALLY FUNNY GO CHECK IT OUT LOL

Francie

yep. tim/autumn/sammy/olivia/me alliance is a thing now. fingers crossed

Tim

Fill me up will alllll your propaganda. This is my second chance and I'm ready to get to the end.

Jay Bee

Honestly I think this swap has put me in a good position. I know enough people well enough to have options, but not well enough that I think I'll be targeted because of it. I have no idea who the fuck I'm going to align with though. The idea of Rebecka/Madison is scary, and Timmy says Rebecka/Dan is also a thing. I trust Timmy for some reason (I'm a meninist #exposed). OKAY so here's a swap assessment night 1: Timmy - Like I said, idk why but I Trust Ha. Hopefully he's not secretly a rat Bryan - A grade a Good Boy. Would definitely like to align with him. We just called for like half an hour so I'm hoping to nail down a relationship there. Brian - Um? I guess he's pretty new, which I think is good. I think he's really the only person on this tribe with no preconceived notions of me or other people Rebecka - Love her to death but SCARED of her relationship with Madison Madison - Same Dan - Seems okay, but I know he's friends with Rebecka so we love a core trio AnnMarie - please work with me Nick - Nobody seems to like him. I think he'll go if we lose, which is at least convenient if not good. Debating if I want to work with him just so that I'm not on the bottom. Rebecka proposed a me/Rebecka/Madison/Timmy/Bryan alliance but honeslee? I think in that formation I'm on the bottom, unless I can get Timmy and Bryan to want to work together with me. Anyway as usual I'm screaming.

Autumn

Me coming home to a bunch of strangers in my tribe https://media.giphy.com/media/nLhdSinRtaL2E/giphy.gif Y'all snatched my whole family and I should be pissed but like I'm really here for this new group so I won't turn up (maybe). Tim is my son, I love Francie, Olivia, and and Sammy already, Heather and Allan seem cool, and then Emily and I are on good terms again lmao. No comment on Jacob. So I come into tribe with all these new people, I'm juggling 7 conversations, and then Francie was like hitting me up for an alliance. I say yeah I really trust you and less than a minute later I'm in an alliance w/ Francie, Tim, Olivia, AND Sammy aka everyone I love? Nut the admins did me a favor https://media1.giphy.com/media/OTbo92zetdsha/giphy.gif

Timmy

This tribe swap is the best thing to ever happen. I actually know where I stand with Rebecka which is great. I know she will always have Dan's interests over mine so that is something I need to think about long-term, but for now it is okay because we are working together. Right now my number 1 is still Jay, I just have a really good feeling about Jay. Bryan worries me because he is an amazing player and I did vote him out in Alaska so who knows if he is bitter about that but we're talking right now so that is good. The second I saw Madison on the cast reveal I knew that I wanted to work with her because we did not get to in Himalayas and I knew ever since then that I wanted to work with her. She is messy and consistently messy but that could be good for me. Might as well have her on my side because if she isn't then I could go fast. But this tribe is amazing, best tribe swap ever!

Jay Bee

I honestly have no idea where the balance between cracked and inactive is!!!! Do you just.,.,.,..,not talk to people? I don't understand. I'm screaming. Help.

Francie

we're towards the end of this challenge i swear to god if jacob doesnt come online in time and fucking costs us this challenge.......

Jay Bee

We're doing the challenge right now and I'm SO DAMN STRESSED. I have a very hard time trying to let other people handle things and trusting others in general, so this is a special kind of hell. I can't believe this season supports underage binge drinking AND I can't believe I wish I were actually drunk. Send help.

Autumn

Candle king walking into Atitlan tonight? Sounds A-lit-lan https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2015-01/7/16/enhanced/webdr08/anigif_enhanced-20692-1420664628-12.gif https://em.wattpad.com/f6983ef619f199370692a5d6aa61048004415cc4/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f5a6e503033794868705a68795a673d3d2d3437393237303538382e313465626162373863366266356435353733373138343330393837362e676966?s=fit&w=1280&h=1280

Tim

So I FORGOT TO CONFESS HAHAHAH But this tribe swap puts me in a seemingly good spot my tribe seems strong and capable! An alliance was formed by Olivia that consists of her, me, Francie, Sammy and Autumn.  I doubt that it will last simply due to the fact that it was based on absolutely nothing game wise. Im looking forward to working with Autumn closely as well as Emily so theres that! The 99 bottles challenge was intersecting as Jay would say. IT FUCKNG STRESSED ME THE FUCK OUT. It felt like I was micromanaging a little Ceasers or something. Making the lists AND posting at the same time?? Allan messed up but it was no big deal at all. JAKE DISAPPEARED ON US which sucks heavilyyyyyyy. Hes prob going if we lose again. Hopefully. ANYWAYS THAT reward challenge is giving me multiple strokes and gastreoarthritis or some shit like that lmao. I lieterally fel like Cirie in that one episode where she kept falling of of that balance beam. Im such a comp flop I mean the only comp I can win is Mastermind and thats if im lucky.

Nick

ABOUT TRIBE SWAP so we get into our new times and ONCE AGAIN all the people im close with exception for madison and timmy IS ON THE OTHER TRIBE AHH. Dan and Rebeckka hate me for the drama we had a month ago or so. Timmy is good friends with Dan and Beckka from what I know so like im probably screwed if we dont win the challenge. SO yeahhh this will be interesting I want my old tribe back LOLOL

Tim

So I forgot to mention that Em and I were sharing letters and so that at least lets me know that she is interested in working with meee. Also im gonna lie and say I didnt get a letter because I didnt attempt fhjksk s (Reward challenge that is)

Nick

CHALLENGE so we lost the semi live challenge .. kind of embarassing like too We had this whole plan set up and it got ruined Now i am going to tribal and welll if im voted out then i wont be surprised. Hopefully I have been proving myself helpful in challenges so hopefully im kept around longer #prayfornick

Jay Bee

This tribal is gonna be batshit!! Literally twenty minutes ago everyone was like "let's just go nick" but now I'm really Thinking About It and. That would be stupid. If you look at Madison/Dan/Rebecka as a trio (with Rebecka/Madison as a core duo OR Rebecka/Dan as a core duo) and with Bryan as kind of a gentle soul sucking their teet (love u bryan), then that's a solid group of 4. If Timmy and I (I guess I'm a meninst now bc we're f2 or some shit) go with that group, leaving out Brian and AnnMarie, to vote out Nick, that puts the two of us on the bottom of a 6-person alliance. The next tribal could be 4 vs. 4. If we save Nick, however, and vote off Rebecka - therefore voiding both the madison/rebecka duo and the dan/rebecka duo, thus destroying the trio - the next tribal could be 5 vs. 3 and we won't have one of the biggest social threats still in the game with two of her closest allies up with her. I think that would put me in a much better position long-term because I really need a core group of people who aren't ingrained with Emily/Francie/Heather/Olivia come a merge situation where it's my kids vs. me. Timmy, Brian, AnnMarie, and (unfortunately) Nick could be an integral part of that. Especially Brian, since he's new. I can use new. I need to keep around players who don't know me that well.

Timmy

Jay is cracked and I love her for it. We are playing so messy and are in alliances with literally the entire tribe. Love being a swing vote. Splitting up Rebecka and Dan is going to be a great move, it will suck personally and Dan will give me a lot of shit for it (and Rebecka might too) but it is just a game so have to have fun and being a mess is fun to me. Might as well be toward the top of a group than knowing I'm at the bottom of the group of 4 (Dan/Rebecka/Madison/me). I'm really just hoping this doesn't hurt me having a relationship with Madison at some point because I still want to work with her. The only worry in the plan is Brian because who knows what goes on in his head but I know he isn't controlled by Rebecka who is just telling everyone her plan and adding people to alliances without asking. Like I never said I was okay with her/dan/madison (I was happy to have a group, but a better one came along). All in all though, Jay is my number one so whatever benefits us both is what I am here for.

Brian

Its still eh. Some people are fake and there is so much pre-season relationships that i'm so oof. BUT i dont wanna be in the minority and if joining a make shift alliance helps, i'm down for it. 

Bryan

Woo ok so we lost. That sucks. But I’m in an alliance with rebecka, dan, jay, Madison, and Timmy. And our goal is to vote out nick. I’m fine with that operative. He already talked about wanting to go against me rebecka and dan so like oops. I also love Annemarie. I need at least one person outside that alliance and that is her. 

Allan

THANK GOD WE WON THAT CAUSE I FUCKED UP. But like seriously, I was so scared that we were gonna lose and I was gonna be at fault for it. Tbh I'm a little annoyed cause it really feels like Tim and I did all the work and when we asked other people to take over, no one offered. It really makes a bit dubious about trusting my tribe.

Olivia

Woohoo! We won immunity! I am just so happy about that. I have a nice sweet little alliance going with the three aca tacos and another one with us three and tim and autumn. Autumn is all alone and idk Tim's relationship with Allan. Tim Allan. Ahahahahhhaha. Anyways. Jacob's ass was GONE if we hadn't won. He is still my target should we lose the next one. I also did Pancreas and got a 29 minute score which I am assuming is terrible but who knows. I love Emily and Heather but I know for a fact, without confirmation, those two are working together. Emily has fawned over Heather since isle of skye and I just know they're a pair. I love both SO MUCH  but i can't fully trust either. I thought for sure that being on a tribe with heather and tim, two close friends of mine, we'd immediately bond and become our new ride or dies. lol. but i think i can still work with both maybe but i like the 5 i already have so i guess we will see. how is it i have two idols, an extra vote, and i won immunity in another org but this one i got THIRTY MINUTES at Pancreas. oh well.

Heather

I have not confessed about my new tribe yet. I am now on the Atitlan tribe which is fun, and I have Emily who is a queen. Plus now I have some of my Isle of Skye people. I've missed playing with Olivia so  much, ughh love of my life. And Tim is such an iconic king. Also Jacob from my other tribe, who has been inactive recently. Gotta do other impressions too Francie: I love them with all my hort. What a perfect bean. Allan: Seems super chill but immediately went into game talk Autumn: A sweetheart ughh my love. Saved our ass in the challenge like 5 times. Sammy: He likes musical theatre so I love him. nuff said AND WE WON OUR FIRST CHALLENGE TOGETHER WHICH IS FUN SO YEET

Dan

So this is a damn mess, I really want to trust that Nick doesn't have a secret majority alliance against me and Beckka because I don't know why literally everyone would just lie, ya know? But I wouldn't be surprised if it happens honestly. I think Beckka would go over me???? But like that's the ugliest thing ever. I don't know why Jay would make an alliance with most of the people in the game if it wasn't a solid thing, but like I'm still paranoid af. IT'S SO EARLY TO FLIP. 

AnnMarie

I am so glad we didn't have to complete the full challenge because that was something I did not want to do at all (sorry Cameron). The only.nad part is that we have to go to tribal. Nick's name has been flying from all directions, and it's the obvious easy vote, but Nick is saying that Dan and rebecka are a powerful team. Jay has said that as well, so I don't really know what may go down at tribal. What I do know is that Nick will probably be the person voted out, as long as nothing super dramatic happens in the tribe. I'm super close to Jay and she's just amazing, Dan's super nice, and I LOVE BRYAN OK HE IS SO NICE AND I HOPE HE DOESNT END UP BEING A JERK in the long run. I'm so happy that I get to play with these people, and I can't wait to start a good alliance in this game with them.

Jay Bee

Loyalty? Who's she?

I told Nick EXPLICITLY last night not to tell Madison about our plan or alliance because she would tell Dan and Rebecka. Today, I wake up to the intel (from Dan) that Nick told Madison about everything. And guess the fuck what!! She told Rebecka and Madison. I'M NOT DUMB, NICK! Thankfully they all thought Nick was trying to make a power play and they don't believe I'm with Nick. NICK DO YOU NOT REALIZE HOW CLOSE I AM TO SLITTING YOUR THROAT!!! If you're gonna be loose-lipped I'm going to have to vote you out! Ugh. This is such a prickly position. I would much rather work with Brian/AnnMarie/Timmy just because they don't know me as well as Rebecka and Madison (and to an extent Bryan through Emily) do. I'm trying to figure out who the most disenfranchised people on the tribe are and use them because if I can be their only source of trust, they're always going to be loyal to me. The problem is that I don't want the next tribal to be 4 vs. 4. That gets messy really fast. If I do vote for Nick in the big group of Madison/Rebecka/Bryan/Dan/Timmy, that puts me in an alliance with all the power players and leaves out AnnMarie and Brian, who would be much smarter to have on my side in a merge situation, unless I want to go meat shield tactic in this game. I don't know Ugh. Timmy, please come online so I can talk through all of this.

Rebecka and Dan

https://youtu.be/AUDFxIjAuZM

Amanda (Guest)

Hello! So I know I'm not playing this game, and Cameron probably won't post this, but I was SUPPOSED to play this game so I'm leaving a confessional anyway. Just here to say that Rebecka and Emily are the true icons of the season for having me in their host chats and that's all. Also Cam. I love Cam.

Sammy

I’m so glad that our team won woooooo

Emily

Omg I'm such a FLOP! I didn't realize I hadn't confessed so hey I'm in public speaking pretending to do my work! Anyways, super happy about our tribe winning the challenge. I really was thinking we were going to lose because of FUCKING JACOB! He like. Was not here. At all. Total flop. Major flop. I haven't even heard from him in like two days. WHY PLAY A SKYPE BASED GAME IF YOU DONT CHECK SKYPE REGULARLY??? Anyways, I recorded a cast assessment but it's a mess because I'm really sad in it and you can tell im a mess so im gonna type it bc you can't tell im upset when im typing!!!!!!!!!!! ALLAN: Really helpful in the challenge so I'm a stan! Hard to talk to I think but I'm really vibin him. I think he's gonna be a good asset to our tribe! Yay! I don't really have much to say about him right now AUTUMN: I'm going to PRAY that she's not bitter from All Stars. That was like a month ago and honestly get the fuck over it. You made a stupid move and it backfired on you! That's it. Don't make a stupid move against me this game and I'll work with you! I really like Autumn and I like how she plays but reading her Navarino confessions I can tell she's just someone that holds onto grudges for far too long and it's annoying. All Stars is not a good representation of my game. WORK WITH ME PLEASE FRANCIE: love of my life.... I said in the beginning I didn't want to work with them but I realized that if I want to work with Tim.... Francie is probably also gonna have to be my ally. Francie and I were also talking about how, if we lose, Jacob would be an easy vote because he's inactive! I know that a lot of people would be fine with that. Also, he hasn't competed in Pancho so I don't think he has any letters? Like he didn't even get the one from the rules? So no idol for Jacob. Easy vote. Bye bye. HEATHER: I'll sell my soul for Heather. My queen. I love her. Honestly I can't wait for her to snake me. Fucking queen. I just love her. If anyone targets her I'M COMING FOR THEIR ASS. STAY OFF HEATHER BYE BYE! JACOB: Inactive. Bye OLIVIA: I REALLY want to work with Olivia. I plan on making her my number one in this game. I just get such a good vibe from her. She seems intelligent, stealthy, and fun... that's what I want in an ally. She also has some good connections with other people and she's got a good social game. Definitely someone I want to work with and go far with. But, not too far because she'll win the game, but... I'm also trying to be loyal this game. Loyal to a fault makes people upset. So. I'm gonna have to decide. SAMMY: I played with him and Indonesia and led the charge to vote him out right before merge so like he could hate me? But he also voted for me to win the game. SO. I don't think he's bitter, but he knows I think he plays messy. He's super sweet though and I'm a stan. I gotta be careful what I leak to him, but I like him and can see myself working with him in the future. TIM: MY KING! I love Tim and want to work with Tim high key. He's such a sweetheart and I'm really hoping we can go far. I'd be so down for a little group of he, Olivia, and I. Is that proper grammar? I don't care. Anyways, I love how he plays and he's very well thought out and stuff so I'm really hoping we can go far together. I'm a Tim stan. A major Tim stan. It's still too early for me to for sure tell you who I'm working with (I usually go from round to round, but I don't want to do that this game. No flip-flopping this time unless it genuinely will be better for me AND others.) I'm really trying to refine how I play. I'm trying to be more honest. More social. More logical and strategic, but at the same time, not as PURELY strategic? I need to make sure my social game is phenomenal before I start going off and being a strategic mastermind. People won't listen to people they don't like, and they won't vote for them either. Whew. Okay I hope this super long confession makes up for my lack of confessing. Goodbye!

Jacob

I was asked to make a confession so here it is. I'm glad we won or I'd be screwed for falling asleep after inventory bleh.

Timmy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OolhMHA3F0o&feature=youtu.be

Emily

Finding out all these people's zodiac signs is very inch resting... I y'all I really do. Capricorns? Gotta go next. I don't stan. Bye bye.

Madison

WHOO okay last minute confessionals lemme hear you say WAYYYY HO!!!! Nick is the vote which like awk bc now we’re in another game together so sucks I guess. Also he came to me trying to vote puts rebecka though so like wtf bye bye. 

Rebecka

Me if I get voted out tonigt: Thank you dan and jay for being loyal. Thank you also the the people who voted me out now so I don't have to go through a bunch of other rounds of drama and lose xoxo