#there's no way I will have to postpone those finals

[doodlingwren]

Ok, back to girlblogging eheh (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

[velvetydream]

꒰ :🥀 [ The radio star lost ] ”♡ᵎ꒱ˀˀ ↷ ⋯

Summary : Your husband was the feared serial criminal in New Orleans, Louisiana, and you where his dearly beloved wife, his right hand. So.. Oh what a despair was awaiting you soon..

Pairing : Human! Alastor x Wife! Reader

Word count : 3549 Words

Genre : Angst, Drama, Romance (a bit)

Warnings ➵ Murder, Swearing, Blood, Death, Guns,

Death penality, Corpses

a/n : Continuation of my Alastor x Wife! Reader > Till death do us part < , seeing as this isn't really a continuation, but rather a prequel, it can be read as a stand-alone, hope ya'll still enjoy it just as much as the first part!♡

Another thing in advance, this is purely fiction and shall not be seen anywhere near reality, I do not condone anything in this and it's pureply based on fiction.

┌───────────────────────── ·  ·  ·  · ♡

1933'

You were like Bonnie and Clyde. A criminal duo, invincible. Or so you thought.

Alastor, your beloved husband. The man you had known for almost two decades, married for almost one decade now. You loved him dearly, even with his little quirks and tendencies. He worked as a well-known and quite popular radio host in New Orleans. Yet he had a tendency for disposing of those he deemed right, you had helped him many times already. Having found out way before you even married him, how he was a murderer, yet you found it enticing, how his mind worked, who he deemed worthy to let go.

"Dear, the meal is almost ready!" You got pulled out of your thoughts by the soft voice of your husband. It was rather unusual for the man to cook in a marriage, but your relationship was far from ordinary, so you enjoyed it. His cooking was far better than yours after all. "I'm coming!" Standing up from the couch, you make your way over to the kitchen, there he was in all his glory. His brown hair was pushed back, glasses sitting on top of his head instead of resting on his nose, and sleeves pushed up to not get them dirty, ironic considering the amount of times he got them bloody. "It smells amazing my beloved! Thank you so much!" A quick peck was pressed to your husband's cheek, as you took a seat at the table, some amazing meal steaming on the table. Alastor puts his apron away, sitting down as he slides his glasses back onto his nose.

Dinner time was always one of your favorites during the day, enjoying a warm meal while talking to your husband about both of your days.

Just after you had finished dinner, your husband took a seat in front of the piano, letting his hands softly glide over the tiles. The instrument echoed with the soft tune he was playing. Walking behind him, you lay your arms around his neck softly, swaying your body a bit to the music he played. Alastor was a talented man with instruments, being able to play a few of them, the piano being one of them. Also quite talented with the violin. "Oh my darling, what a beautiful tune as always~" Humming along now. No one heard the screams coming from the basement. The desperate screams of your next victim.

"When we're talking about music right now my dearest, Mimzy invited us to her performance tomorrow! So how about we postpone our.. plans to the day after tomorrow?" No killing and instead going to Mimzy's show? Oh yes! "Oh, how lovely that sounds! Of course!" Agreeing to his proposal. But for now, you two get ready for bed, lying down in your shared bed.

Another one of your favorite times of the day, getting to lay down with him and finally rest, letting the stress and exhaustion of the day pass. "Did I ever tell you that I love you a lot?" Resting your head on your husband's chest now, who was silently reading a book, closing it now that you were talking to him. "Many times darling and I do love you a lot too~" Alastor knew his way around words for sure, he was such a sweet talker, but that's one of the things you appreciated about him. Raising your head to face him, you take a glance at his lips, before up into his eyes, you knew how he felt about touches he didn't initiate, right now you were only cuddling because he pulled you onto him. Chuckling lowly, he lowers his head down and captures your soft lips with his. Alastor's kisses mostly were soft, like a butterfly resting on your hand or like a spring breeze. Usually, his kisses were planted on your hand or cheek, but from now and then he gave you the satisfaction of a soft kiss on the lips, which always left you giggling like you were right now. Falling asleep in the safe embrace of your husband shortly after.

The next day went by smoothly. Alastor was busy with his work as a radio host, while you took care of the house and did some grocery shopping, meeting up with a few friends of yours over tea. Shortly before you went home for the day, you visited Alastors mothers grave to leave some flowers and clean it, you sadly never met her, but your husband tends to tell you a lot of stories about her. Sitting down by the grave for a minute, you tell her a bit about what Alastor has been doing, how you were loving his cooking and music as always. It was a habit of yours, you hoped she was listening to all the good things you were telling her about him. Taking your things after a while, you bid your goodbye to his mother's grave as you make your way back home. Putting away the groceries before starting to freshen up. Loving to take your time to get ready when you and Alastor decide to go out in the evening.

"Dearest I'm home!" Hearing the lovely voice of your husband calling from the door, answering him now, how you were getting ready. Putting on your favorite dress. It was made out of a beautiful deep red color with black lace all over it, a few gems here and there. Your best jewelry could of course not be missing, most of it you got from Alastor or your own mother. "Darling I'm ready! How far are you?" Exiting the bathroom now, searching for your husband and finding him in the kitchen with a glass of whisky. "Oh my, what do I see here? What a lovely gem you are darling!" Abandoning his glass, Alastor walks over to you, taking your hand as he twirls you around, before kissing the back of your hand. Clad in a black suit, his button-up shirt underneath dark red matching to your dress, while his bowtie was adorned with a red gem, he looked lovely. "My you also look lovely dearest! Definitely going to catch some eyes!" Hooking your arm in his now, you together leave the house and make your way to where Mimzy's show will be held.

Mimzy was a great friend of Alastor, a blonde gorgeous but short lady, who performed like no other. Arriving at the place, you were led to a table for the regulars, as Alastor and you were known by the staff by now. Ordering two drinks, as you await the show. Soon lights go out and Mimzy comes out, her singing and dancing amazing like always.

"Dollface! Pumpkin!" Mimzy's voice was booming as she approached your table, giving both of you an affectionate hug. You ended up talking with her for quite a while, telling her how amazing her performance was and that you were so glad that she invited you two again. Thanking you for your kind words, her attention quickly diverted to Alastor again. It was almost always like this, she said she liked both of you, but you couldn't shake the feeling that she did have a certain distaste for you. But you decided to let it slide like always, as you listened to Alastor tell Mimzy what you two were up to since you've last seen her.

Alastor of course started to notice how you were getting irritated by Mimzy and how she was only focusing on him. "My dear, I think my lovely wife is not feeling so well tonight, perhaps it would be better to take our leave now, still thank you for having us as always. Till the next time." Alastor stood up now as Mimzy stomped off with an annoyed face, extending his hand for you. Smiling at him softly as you take his hand and let him lead you outside. A shiver ran down your spine as your arms got goosebumps, a coat was soon placed over your shoulders, looking over to Alastor who watched you with a soft smile. "Dear, next time you feel uncomfortable please do tell me and we will leave immediately, you know how much I care for your comfort." Thanking him, you take his arm as he leads you through the park to your home, it was a little longer than walking through the streets, but it was calming to walk through nature together.

"Shall we head to bed? It's been a long day and evening." Taking the coat from your shoulders at home, he hangs it on the hanger beside the door. "I love that idea, let me tell you about my day in bed, I visited your mothers grave again." You were already walking to the room as you talked to him, so you weren't able to see his eyes follow you as they softened. It saddened him you never got to meet his mother, she would've loved you dearly, just as he does. Telling him all about what you told her before, how you left flowers and also cleaned her gravestone, as you settled into bed, as he was changing into his sleepwear. Alastor was so thankful for having a caring and lovely wife like you.

The night went by fast, today Alastor would finally have a day off from work, which meant a different kind of work today for both of you!

The steps down to the basement squeaked as Alastor put his weight on them, your heels making clicky noises as you followed him down a stark contrast in sound. And there sat the victim he deemed perfect for his next case. The screams would be recorded for his personal little collection. You were getting everything ready for him, it would be interesting to watch like always. Alastor changed so much when he killed, no shimmer or glimmer in his eyes, not how he looked at you, the soft gaze replaced with a blood thirsty one. Liking it quickly, you were soon getting rid of the victim, this time deciding to bury him in a forest, you opted for the forest a few times already even though it was a bit risky, it was the easiest to get rid of them. At home, Alastor decided to take a bath, as he told you to head to bed already with a kiss on your cheek.

When he joined you in bed, he looked relaxed, cuddling up to you. Murders always ended like this, it somehow made him so calm and affectionate with you. Placing a soft kiss on your neck, as his arms hold your waist. Your hand threaded through his brown soft locks, something you loved to do. For once your beloved husband fell asleep quicker than you, making you be able to watch him sleep, not in a creepy way, but in a loving way. Alastor was often so stressed with work, yes he loved being a radio host, but it sometimes got to him. Rubbing your fingers over his cheek softly, then over the bags under his eyes before pressing a kiss to the crown of his head. Yourself slowly falling into dreamland.

Morning came way too quickly, Alastor was back to work, and while you decided to stay at home and do some housekeeping, a few rooms needed cleaning. A friend of yours stopping by to tell you how a new corpse was apparently discovered by the police, which is connected to the many murder cases lately. Tensing up a little bit when she told you how they discovered it in the forest after one of the farmers nearby saw some shadows in there. It couldn't be the corpse from last night, right? Simply agreeing with her that you would be careful, even telling her how your dear husband would never let something happen to you on his watch, which made her coo at your marriage, if only she knew..

Mid conversation your husband comes home, greeting you with a soft kiss on the cheek before he leaves for the back of your home. Your friend leaves soon after, as you go and search for your beloved. Finding him in his office, gripping the table. You knew what was about to come.

"Dear?" Approaching him, Alastor pushes everything on his table off, papers scattering, a cup breaking as pens roll all over the floor. "They already discovered it.. HOW?! I was careful! Pathetic! How dare they! Are they making fun of me?!" Worried for your husband, yet you stood still, listening to him. "I had to talk about it today! At the broadcast! Act as if I was surprised! Haha! If only they knew! Right doll?!" Turning around, his eyes were darting around the room, before falling onto you, laughing as he took your hand to pull you in. "They really think they can discover us like this! US! They are worthless! Pathetic even! Oh my dear! We truly are the greatest!" He was twirling you around as if dancing now, despite no music playing. Only his mad monologue. You've dealt with this behavior a couple of times already, knowing to just let him act and talk for now as he pleased. "Oh, what a wonderful day my beloved! I will go and make my favorite dish for us now! How beautiful!" Leaving the room now, a skip in his step, as you bend down to clean up the mess your husband caused.

Joining him in the kitchen now, as he was softly humming to the radio as he was cooking his favorite, Jambalaya.

A knocking sounds from your door, looking up, you tell Alastor you are going to get it, and upon opening it you come face to face with a detective and a police officer. "Greetings ma'am, is your husband home?" His voice was deep, you nodded, leaning the door closed as you hurried into the kitchen to get your husband. "Greetings gentleman, how may I help you?" Alastor opened the door composed as ever, drying his hands from washing them with a clean towel, as he gave the men at the door a polite smile. You retreated back to the living room, still listening to their conversation. Asking him about the murder cases, why him? It was probably only because of the radio broadcast, right? Maybe his boss told him to talk about it without the detective's permission. As the door closes and Alastor is back in the kitchen, still calm as always as you join him. "Dear? What did they talk about?" Looking up at him with worry written all over your face, he turns to you. "Don't worry your pretty little head dearest, it was nothing to be mentioned! Smile dear, you know you're never fully dressed without one!" Pushing the corners of your mouth up with his fingers now, making you smile, before shushing you out of the kitchen so he can cook. Not able to help it but worry, were you about to be figured out?

But over the course of the next few days it all calmed down again, no more police officers or detectives visiting you, which finally calmed your mind. Alastor meanwhile had found a new target, telling you about this man he met the other day and what bothered him. It was all back to normal now, which you were glad about. Till this one dreadful day.

Alastor and you made quick work of the man, your husband telling you to stay home this time to clean up and that he would take care of this on his own. You worried again, but he assured you that he would be quick, after cleaning up and getting rid of any evidence, you cleaned yourself and sat down to wait for your beloved. Yet after hours of not coming back, you grew anxious, desperate even to know what took him so long. As a knock echoes through your house, you rush to the door, opening it ready to scold your husband for taking so long, but your breath stops when a detective stands in front of you.. What happened?

He asked to enter your home, sitting you down on the couch as he took a seat opposite of you on the armchair. "Your husband got shot ma'am, he was burying a corpse, we assume him to be the serial killer at fault for so many murders lately. He passed away instantly, I'm sorry for your loss and to bring you this horrific and murderous news." Your ears were ringing. Huh? Shot? Was that man joking with you? Was he someone Alastor paid to prank you? No, he wasn't the type for these kinds of pranks. Tears were streaming down your face, burying it in your hands now, sobs shaking your whole body. If that stupid man just knew, knew how you helped your husband with everything! Stupid! "Ma'am I-" The detective started, when you darted up, grabbing the man by his hair and throwing him out of your house. "Get lost! Never show up again! Leave.. NOW!" Slamming the door shut now, he probably took this as a shock to knowing who your husband really was, but you knew that already for years. Sinking to your knees, your arms hug around you as your head hits the floor, screams and cries of agony echo through the now empty halls. Your husband, the man you loved so much was dead, just like this? What sick nightmare was this? Cries reduced to soft sobs when your throat started to hurt, by now your body was curled up into itself on the floor and like that, you fell asleep.

The next day you awoke to the sunlight, your body sore from crying and sleeping on the floor, looking around for a second, for Alastor before it doomed on you, he was dead. Shot like an animal.

Your mother accompanied you to identify your late husband, you of course clad in all black. His forehead is now adorned with a hole, the detective explaining to you that he was mistaken for a deer. Asking for some privacy from everyone, you were left alone in the room. If it wasn't for that damned hole he looked like he was simply sleeping, peacefully like the night before. Leaning down to press one last kiss to his temple. "I will always love you my dearest, for now and forever, till I join you in death."

Leaving the room, you didn't dare look back, you were going forward from now on, knowing that someday you would meet him again.

Your mother had offered for you to move back in with her, but you told her despite what he did, he was a lovely husband to you and that you weren't able to yet let go, which she understood. Back at your home, you sat down and just stared at the wall. Why did this have to happen? You could be cuddling together right now or enjoying a meal, but that would never be the case ever again. But you told yourself, swore yourself with that last kiss to his temple that you would carry on in his memory. And so you did, three more murders continued after your husband was dead, till you were discovered.

In front of the law, you were sentenced to the death due to having caused three murders yourself and helped with multiple, carried out by your late husband. You accepted it, not that anyone asked, but you would be seeing your husband again, at least you hoped you would. A few days later after the case was closed and you were sentenced, it happened.

1935'

"Alastor! Dearest! Charlie told me you wanted to see me?" Entering the radio tower with a bright smile, Alastor turned to you with his signature smile. "My beloved! You look lovely as always! Look at you, aren't you a little gem!" He was walking over to you, his red ears on his head bouncing slightly with each step he took. Closing your eyes now as he told you to do so, a sensation of something cold around your neck running through your body now. "Open up doll!" Opening your eyes and looking down, your eyes tear up. It was a necklace, that looked similar to one he gifted you on the first anniversary of your marriage. "Alastor.." Looking up at him, as a few tears escaped your eyes.

"Now now sweetheart, we don't want you crying hm? Smile dear! You know you're never fully dressed without one!" Giggling a little bit at that quote, he had used it so often when you two were alive. Not being able to help yourself, you throw your arms around his neck and pepper kisses all around his face and lastly a big kiss on his lips, you would be apologizing for suddenly kissing him later, but right now you just needed to kiss him. "I'm glad you love it dearest!" His arms are around your waist now as he laughs at the tickling kisses placed on his face, starting to spin you around as with a snip of his fingers music starts to play.

Charlie and Vaggie watch the soft moment from the door, tears streaming from the blonde's face as her girlfriend pulls her away to give you two some privacy.

[alisonsfics]

words unsaid

pairing: carmy berzatto x reader

summary: after months of flirting and unconfessed feelings, you and carmy get in an argument when a customer gives him her number.

word count: 2.4k

warnings: swearing, angst, carmy being completely unaware of everything

After wiping down your stations for the night, you and Carmy headed to the lockers to grab your bags. You both were exhausted after a hectic night.

“You have any plans for the rest of the night?” Carmy asked, curiously. You shrugged, looking over your shoulder at him as you fiddled with your locker. “You mean besides eating leftover pizza and then passing out from exhaustion?” You joked. You heard a small chuckle from Carmy.

He noticed you were tugging at the locker and the door seemed to be stuck. “Here, let me help you with that.” He offered.

You stepped out of the way and let Carmy take a shot at it. He jiggled the handle a few times and then was able to tug it open. “My hero,” you teased, as he walked back to his own locker.

If you had turned around, you would have seen the pink tint on Carmy’s cheeks.

“Anyway, did you want to maybe go grab a drink. I mean, only if you’re okay with postponing your pizza plans. Those sounded important though,” he teased you. You were one of the few people that Carmy would actually joke around with.

You jokingly scoffed at him. “My commitment to my leftover pizza is none of your business, Berzatto,” you responded, trying to maintain a serious tone. Once again, the sound of his soft chuckle met your ears.

“Hey, guys. Our last table wanted to personally thank their chefs.” Richie said, sticking his head around the corner.

Carmy gestured towards the door, politely letting you walk in front of him. Richie guided you both to the booth that currently seated three women. They were the only remaining customers from the dinner service.

Richie quickly introduced you both to them, and then he headed back to help with clean-up.

You noticed that two of the women seemed to be smirking at their other friend. “The food tonight was absolutely amazing.” One of them perked up and complimented you both.

You politely smiled, letting Carmy take the lead since he was the owner. You saw his posture shift as he went into customer service-mode.

“Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to visit us tonight. We’re glad you liked it.” He said, putting on a polite smile.

Carmy didn’t see it, but you noticed the two women quickly raise their eyebrows at their other friend. She then directed her attention to Carmy.

You knew where the conversation was going, and you hated how it tugged at your gut. You felt a heavy weight on your shoulders, and it took a lot for you to fake a smile.

Carmy was an attractive guy, and he was a chef, which was a pretty good recipe for success. You saw customers fawn over him constantly, but it never got easier.

That being said, Carmy wasn’t technically yours, but he was. He wasn’t your boyfriend by any means, and you weren’t his girlfriend. But, he dropped everything any time you called, and he’d do anything for you.

Your relationship was sometimes flirty, but neither of you had ever taken it further.

“Yeah, the food was really excellent. You’re an amazing chef. I definitely have a reason to come back.” The woman said, coyly.

You forced yourself to bite the inside of your lip, so you could keep your pleasant facade. You noticed their check sitting on the table and decided to use it as your excuse out of there.

“Thank you again for coming,” you said, smiling, grabbing the check, and heading back towards the kitchen. The woman looked like she finally realized you were standing there.

Carmy quickly thanked them again and followed right behind you.

Once the kitchen doors closed behind you, you turned to Carmy. “Being a chef does it every time, Berzatto,” you teased him.

Instead of being met by his usual grin, you saw him tilt his head as he tried to figure out what you were talking about.

“What do you mean?” He finally asked, when he couldn’t figure it out. You waited for a second, almost thinking he was playing dumb. “She was hitting on you, Carmy.” You told him. His eyes widened as he looked at you. “No, she wasn’t,” he argued.

You looked down at the check you were holding, which confirmed your suspicion when you saw a phone number written across the bottom of it.

“Really?” You asked, sliding the check into his hand. Your hand grazed his as you did, which almost made Carmy short circuit. He looked down at the check in his hand and saw the phone number clear as day.

“So, what am I supposed to do?” He asked you. From his perspective, he was asking how he was supposed to let her down and tell her he wasn’t interested. You didn’t take it that way.

“Well, if you’re interested, you call her.” You explained. He was speechless. He stood in front of you, not having a single coherent string of thoughts in mind.

“Wh…what—what do you mean?” He stumbled over his words.

You were practically fuming. You thought that you and Carmy had a thing going on, but he seemed to be pretty interested in asking this girl out.

“Are you interested? Do you want to go on a date with her?” You asked, your tone coming out a little more hostile than you intended. You were just jealous and even more unsure of where your and Carmy’s relationship stood.

“I…I don’t know,” he stammered, taken aback by this whole situation. He was getting love advice from the girl he wanted to be with, but was getting love advice for a different girl.

“Well, you’re the only one who can figure that out,” you huffed and quickly walked away from him. You knew if you continued the conversation for another minute, you’d start crying.

You grabbed your work bag and slammed your locker shut. “Woah, you okay?” Sydney asked from beside you. You hadn’t even noticed she was standing there. You took a deep breath before responding.

“Not really, you wanna go get a drink?” You asked her. She could tell that something had really gotten to you. “Yeah, of course. Is it about Carmy?” she asked, quietly. You just nodded, biting down on your lip and trying not to tear up.

“It’s okay. C’mon, let’s get you out of here,” she said, wrapping her arm around you as the two of you walked out the back door.

Still stunned from the whole encounter, Carmy walked into the office to hopefully clear his head. He sat in there for thirty minutes, continuously replaying his conversation with you in his head. He knew you were mad, but he wasn’t sure why. He was also thrown off by why it seemed like you were encouraging him to go on a date with the other woman.

After wracking his brain for answers, he still had nothing, so he headed towards the back alleyway to smoke a cigarette. He found Richie doing the same thing.

“You okay, cousin?” Richie asked, clearly being able to see how on edge Carmy looked. “Fuck no,” Carmy mumbled.

“Is this about your girl?” Richie asked, having already gotten a text from Sydney that explained what happened. “She’s not my girl, Richie, but I think we’re in a fight, and we’ve never been in a fight before. I just don’t know why she’s mad.” Carmy explained.

“You don’t know why she’s mad?” Richie asked in shock. Carmy looked at him with a confused look and shook his head.

“You two have been flirting and hanging out more and more. Then, you tell her that you maybe want to go on a date with this other girl. You don’t think she’d be hurt by that?” Richie asked him. Carmy didn’t understand why everybody was suddenly an expert on his relationship today and why he was so out of the loop.

“What do you mean, we are just friends.” Carmy argued, not being able to admit anything to the contrary, “wait, how do you know about our conversation?”

“Sydney told me. She’s busy trying to cheer Y/N up because she’s pissed at you.” Richie said, quickly brushing past it, “how does the idea of her going on a date with someone else make you feel, cousin? Like when you watch those customers that stare at her,” he asked.

Carmy hesitated. He knew the answer. “I fuckin’ hate it, but I’m just being protective. We’re friends, and I care about her.” Carmy replied, still in denial.

“Cousin, do you really think colleagues go out for drinks after work and get coffee together before work as often as you guys do? You know all her favorite movies, and her favorite flowers, and the words to all her favorite songs. And that big dinner you made for her birthday,” he told Carmy. Hearing all of it like that made Carmy realize how special your relationship was, but he was having trouble admitting it out loud.

“I’m a chef. I make food for people. It’s what I do.” Carmy argued, not even believing his own excuse.

“Yeah, because it’s like your fuckin’ love language, dickhead. How did you not see this?” Richie asked.

Carmy didn’t know what to think. “So are we like together?” He asked, stunned. Richie shook his finger at Carmy.

“Not until you finally grow a pair and actually make a real move. Ask her out to dinner, tell her how you feel, give her some grand gesture.” Richie told him.

Carmy stood still for a moment, processing what he had just heard.

“Where are her and Syd right now? I need a ride.” He told Richie, desperately. Richie quickly grabbed his car keys, and they both headed out the door.

“I know we’re not dating, but I just don’t understand why he didn’t say he wasn’t interested. Like, surely I can’t be imagining all of the flirting and how sweet he’s been.” You rambled to Sydney, taking another sip of your drink. Sydney nodded along.

“Maybe he felt like he was put on the spot because I’ve seen how he looks at you. He really cares about you but just has a shit way of showing it.” Sydney mentioned.

You looked down at the bar, slowly stirring your drink around. The front door of the bar quickly opened, slamming against the wall. Both yours and Sydney’s gaze went right to the loud noise.

You both saw Carmy burst into the restaurant. His eyes searched around until they landed on yours. He rushed towards the end of the bar where you and Sydney were sitting.

He stopped in front of you and caught his breath for a minute. “I am so fucking sorry. You are my everything, and I really fucked it up. And I don’t even know what I was saying.” He started to ramble.

You were shocked to say the least. “Carmy, you wanna go talk outside?” You suggested, assuming some privacy for this conversation was probably a good idea. He quickly nodded and held out his hand to help you down from your seat.

Sydney gave you a reassuring smile, and then you felt Carmy’s hand on the small of your back as he followed you outside. Now that he had a better grasp on your relationship, he felt much more confident, which made him more affectionate. And you loved it.

He rushed in front of you, so he could hold the front door open for you. You both saw Richie waiting outside. “Syd’s inside. Can you give us a minute, cousin?” Carmy asked him. Richie quickly nodded and headed inside to freak out with Sydney that they were so close to getting you two together.

“I didn’t mean any of that earlier. I was just confused, and it felt like you wanted me to ask that girl out. So, I was questioning if you felt the same way I feel about you.” He apologized. He had to stop himself from grabbing your hands. He wanted to, but he wanted to apologize first.

“Enough of what I want. Tell me before I waste anymore of my time. Carmen Berzatto, what do you want? Do you want to be with me?” You asked him. You felt like you were being harsh, but you wanted everything to be out in the open.

“I want to be with you so fuckin’ bad.” He said. One of his hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him. He used his other hand to cup your cheek and close the distance with a kiss.

Richie and Sydney saw the kiss through the window and had to stop themselves from cheering.

You stumbled forward a little since Carmy had pulled you towards him so quickly. He tightened his grip around your waist, while smirking into the kiss. You let your hands rest on his forearms, feeling his biceps flex under your fingertips.

The kiss was rushed, fueled by months of pent up feelings and the fear of losing each other that you both had experienced. Neither of you wanted to let the other go.

His lips tasted like spearmint as they moved effortlessly against yours. There was a loud clap of thunder above you both, and the sky opened up as it started pouring.

You both pulled out of the kiss in shock at the freezing rain that was hitting your skin. You both just grinned at each other, knowing how picture-perfect this moment was.

“You wanna go inside?” He almost had to yell for you to hear him over the rain. You just shook your head. You wanted to enjoy every single second.

He grabbed your hand and spun you around in a circle, watching as the rain droplets flew off the ends of your hair.

You were smiling and giggling. You grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him back into a kiss. “You are perfect,” he mumbled as he kissed you.

He finally pulled out of the kiss when he noticed you shivering. “This is magical, but I’m not gonna let you get sick.” He said, wrapping his arm around your waist and leading you back inside where you were met by the smiling faces of Richie and Sydney. They both immediately pulled you into a hug.

“You know how hard we had to work for this to happen because you both wanted to be in denial for months that you’re head over heels for each other.” Sydney teased you both. You just smiled at Carmy, and all you could think about was how the rest of your coworkers were going to freak out when they heard.

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[mrsparrasblog]

Traitor

„Please Lt, ah beg ye oan mah haun 'n' knees fur it.“

„No.“ The conversation went like this for hours, with Johnny begging on his knees for Ghost to go on a date with you.

„Please, Lt.“

„How did that even happen, Johnny?“

„Weel, me 'n' Garrick thought yi'll need tae git leid, sae we made a fake Instagram 'n' wrote bonnie girls pretending we wur ye.“

„I don't need to get laid, so tell her I postpone.“ He certainly needed a good lay, but that wasn’t something he could tell Soap. He was his CO officer after all, and the way he intruded on his privacy made him want to rip off Soap's mohawk and make him eat the hair.

„A dinnae want ye tae kip wi' her, a'm wantin' ye tae gang oan a ill date wi' her 'n' mak' her forgoat ye,“ the Scotsman said, letting his true intentions slowly slip.

„You want me to treat her badly? What's wrong with you, MacTavish?“ Simon Riley was a lot, but not a man who treated a bird badly, or else his mom would come back from the grave just to swat him, and he would have deserved that hit.

„Please, Lt.“ Johnny begged, the despair visible in his icy eyes.

„Ye like her?“ And by Soap's stunned reaction, Simon knew everything he needed to know. That idiot pretended to be him, made this naive girl want him, and fell in love with her. And now he can't have her because she is head over heels, but not with Johnny.

„Yes, please, Lt.“

„No.“

„I’ll give you my ration of tea for the next three months.“ That was something Simon couldn’t resist. Extra Earl Grey—he did worse things for less.

„Okay, I’ll go on a date with her and let her down slowly for you to comfort her.“

---------

Simon believed himself to be a determined man who doesn’t change his opinion just because of a good-looking woman. Well, this changed when he saw you waiting at the bar for him, all dolled up. Your dress matched your heels and the color of your nails; you prepared yourself for him—just for him. That was new. And when you hugged him tight as a greeting and the smell of cookies wafted into his rugged nose, Johnny's little crush was forgotten.

He was sure you wouldn’t mind; you were here for him and not for Johnny. He was better looking after all, he thought.

All he could do was listen to your sweet voice as you explained your job with excitement, how your nose scrunched when you laughed, and how you threw him those fuck-me eyes. He was curious if you’d give Johnny the same eyes if your hand touched his abs too, if you chewed on your red lips.

-----------------------------

Johnny was on his way to play the knight in shining armor for you, comforting you after the big brute broke your innocent heart. But when he walked past Ghost's room, he could hear the desperate pleas and whimpers from a woman.

„Si, please, need more,“ you moaned, trying to get him to finally fuck you after he gave you orgasm after orgasm.

„Need you to be ready for me, love.“

…

„So big, Si.“

„You can take it, love.“

And in that moment, Johnny realized he was betrayed by his best friend and brother-in-arms.

[noosayog]

004 logical

✧ wc: 2.5k

✧ warnings/content: oikawa toru x reader, no gendered pronouns used but please lmk if I missed any! sfw, angst to fluff, another breaking up making up fic, long distance relationship

✧ GUTS masterlist, regular masterlist

divider from @/cafekitsune

“I don’t think this is working out.” 

When Oikawa hears those words, marred by phone static, he drops the remote from his left hand and his fork from his right. 

“Baby,” he says cautiously, disoriented. “It’s just a few more days.” 

There’s a moment of silence. Oikawa picks up the phone and presses it to his ear. 

“It’s not just that,” you say quietly. “How much longer are we going to do this – not seeing each other, missing calls, postponing flights? Even when we’re talking, we’re not fully focused on each other.” 

“That’s not true,” he immediately protests. 

“Yes, it is. Were you not just watching a game and eating right before this?” 

“That doesn’t mean I’m not fully focused on you.” 

“Yes, Toru. It does.” 

He has so much to say, yet none of it seems to come out. Nothing seems appropriate. 

You sigh again. “Just… stay, Toru. Stay there. You don’t have to fly back to Japan for me. I know volleyball’s important for you.” 

When he says nothing, you go on. “But I hate the way this makes me feel. Like I’m asking you to give up what you love to fly across the globe just to see me for a few days.”

“You’re not. I want to-” 

“Toru.” 

His mouth clamps shut. 

“Last time you came back to Japan, you missed a last-minute practice match with that coach you’ve been wanting to work with. Last time I came to you, I spent 2 of the 4 days I was there alone because you had another last minute volleyball thing. Even when we invest the time to see each other, we’re not really… there.” 

Oikawa knows; he knows. 

“So let’s just… not.” 

He knows, but that doesn’t mean he wants to… not. 

“Just hold on a couple more days, okay?” he asks, trying his hardest not to beg and whimper. “Just a couple of days, and I’ll be back in Japan and we can talk, figure something out.” 

“Toru…” 

“Please, wait for me.” 

“I don’t know if I have that in me anymore.” 

The coldness of your words seize his chest. 

Hearing nothing more from him, you sign off with finality, “Good bye, Toru.”

And the line cuts off. 

–

Today is Friday, the beginning of the 3-day long exchange scrimmages with the visiting Brazilian and Chilean pro teams. Duffle bag tossed on the floor by his feet, Oikawa flops on the couch, downing the remainder of his protein shake. The bright screen of his laptop stares back at him, email confirmation of his flight change there to reprimand him, remind him. 

Your Flight AE344 to Haneda International Airport for Thursday, February 8th has been canceled. 

You’re booked for Flight AE267 to Haneda International Airport for Monday, February 12th! See you soon! 

After you had hung up, he gave you a call back. You didn’t answer. He tried again an hour later, then 2, then 12. He had listened to the line ring, for exactly 20 seconds, 8 rings, before banishing him to your unset-up voicemail. 

Shutting the laptop screen, he picks up his duffle and is out the door. After all, if he didn’t show up to the scrimmage, what would this have all been for? 

–

Friday night arrives, and despite how tired he is, physically from all the exercise and mentally from all the socialization with the visiting players, you wander through his mind. He supposes this is hardly surprising, given you’ve always been his place of rest, regardless of the physical distance, sheer kilometers between the two of you. 

Almost afraid to look, he checks his phone and immense disappointment and an increasingly familiar emptiness fill his chest when he sees nothing from you. 

He tries your phone again. It rings, rings, and rings and there’s no reward, your voice waiting at the other end.

He showers, eats a quick dinner, and meal preps for Saturday’s scrimmage. Busying himself works momentarily, but at 9PM, his phone alarm goes off, reminding him that it’s time to call you. For the past year, his routine has been talking on the phone with you every night at 9PM. No matter where he is, at a bar with teammates, at dinner with friends, or late night practice, he always takes at least 10 minutes to talk to you. 

When the two of you first established this, the agreed upon time was 10PM for him, 10AM for you. The two of you used to compete to see who could call who first. The first night, you called the exact second the clock struck 10. So the next night, Oikawa called at 9:59. Then the following night, you called at 9:58. And it went on until the two of you begrudgingly came to a truce that you’d alternate nights. 

And tonight is your night. 

Five minutes after 9, Oikawa knows the call isn’t coming. 

–

Late Friday night – or technically early Saturday morning – Oikawa lays awake in bed wondering how the hell it all went down the way it did. It hasn’t even been a full year since the two of you started to do long-distance. And he’s still confused. He’s confused because he thought the two of you were doing the best you could be. He’s confused because he’s never even thought about the possibility of not being with you. 

He twists over to lay on his side, facing his phone screen, open at your contact. His thumbs hover over your name for the nth time that night, only for him to flop back on his back, turning now to the other side, your side. It hits him then that he can’t even remember the feeling of you in that bed, the last time you kissed. If he had known that would be the last time, he would've savored it all the more. He’d burn the memory into his nerves, just so he could remember the feeling. Volleyball was all muscle memory; he never thought he’d need to commit you as well. 

Before he knows it, morning arrives. He starts to get ready. 

He brushes his teeth, packs his gym bag, and starts to eat breakfast. 

His legs shake, knees bouncing up and down in a nervous tick that hasn’t shown itself since high school. His laptop screen is up again, the flight ticket once again flashing bright. 

It’s a reminder. Now he knows that when it’s not reciprocal, the distance between the two of you is so much more than 18,000 kilometers and 12 hours. There’s no phone line, no facetime to shorten that distance, even if just by perception. 

Then, it’s a striking thought: a realization that postponing a plane ride those few days could cost him a lifetime.

He dials your number again. 

It rings, and rings, and rings. 

“... Hello?” 

“You picked up,” he hears himself say. 

“Sorry I missed yesterday, Toru.” He knows what you’re referring to without you saying it. “And I’m sorry I hung up… like that.” 

There’s a lot to say, but he can’t do it like this. So he asks, “will you wait for me to come home?” 

“Toru…” your voice breaks with the syllables of his name. He hears the reluctance in your tone. 

“If you want to break up, if you truly want to stop being with me,” it takes monumental effort for Oikawa to even speak of such an event. “Then say it to me in person. I have to know.” 

You’re silent in response. He’s glad you aren’t refusing, saying that the flight, the cost, the time isn’t worth itt. He’s glad that you agree it’s still a worthwhile conversation to have in person. He’s glad you haven’t given up. 

“Wait for me, okay? Please.” 

It takes a few simple clicks and a significant chunk of his savings to do what he does next. 

– 

For the entirety of the flight to Haneda International, Oikawa’s knees bounce, colliding uncomfortably with the seat in front of him. Even with what little affirmation you gave him by simply picking up his call, it brings him little comfort as there’s absolutely nothing he could do for the next 28 hours but sit tight. 

When the plane lands safely in Tokyo, local time of 9PM Sunday, Oikawa charms his way into getting off the plane first. He flashes a weak smile at all the people still in their seats of the plane, before rushing off with only his carry-on in tow. There’s no time to wait for a bus, so he shoves his way to the front of the taxi line, reciting your address as if it hadn’t been over 4 months since he’s been there. 

Every passing moment does little to ease his nerves, exacerbated even up until the moment he arrives at your door. The seconds pass in loud silence, the hollow sound of his knocking ringing in his ears. 

All the white noise fades, though, when the door opens and reveals you. No matter that your eyes are red and swollen, no matter that you’re wearing one of his old ratty Seijoh sweaters, no matter that the two of you are supposed to be breaking up.

“Toru,” you breathe. Oikawa forgets you’re supposed to sound like this, not the distorted, muffled imitation of your voice he hears through the phone too often. Yet another addition to his growing list of realizations. 

“What are you doing here?” 

He doesn’t know where it comes from, but a single heave of a laughter bursts from his chest. “I told you I wanted to see you, didn’t I?” 

“But… your flight wasn’t supposed to arrive until Wednesday.” You’re cautious and he hates that. He wants you to be uncaring of the emotions you show around him, to jump into his arms and forgive him. He wants it back. 

“I changed my flight.” 

“But volleyball…” 

“That’s the thing,” he starts. “I think that’s probably one of the things I never made clear to you.” 

You look at him, confused. 

“Can I come in?” 

It stings when you instinctively fold your arms over your chest protectively, eyes briefly leaving him to look at the ground. 

 “Will you let me in?” he tries again. 

You look back up at him, moving to the side to let him in. 

When the door clicks shut behind him, the first thing Oikawa does is wrap you up in his embrace. His arms engulf you. He forces his hold to be gentle, on the chance that you push away. You don’t, so he holds on tighter and tighter, until you squeak from the pressure. He thinks he mumbles an apology, but he’s not really sure because all he registers is your arms coming up to grab his sweater. 

It’s not enough. 

You let him just hold you, for how long, he doesn’t know, until you finally squeak out his name. He reluctantly pulls away and starts talking, as if he wants to get the talking part over as fast as possible so he can pull you right back in again. 

“The thing I wanted to tell you,” he continues from before. “There’s no comparison – between you and volleyball, I mean.” 

“Toru, you know that’s not true.” 

Yes, it is,” he insists. “I’ve never seen volleyball as something that takes away from time that belongs to you. Every time you come to see me, or I go to see you, or when I push a flight, I’ve always seen that as just a… postponement of our time together, never that it would take away from it.” 

“Toru…” you push further away. 

“But, I think I get it now. I get that phone calls, video calls, text messages can’t be a substitute. I know because I almost forgot how your voice sounds outside of a phone and because I can’t accept us breaking up through a screen. And even more so because I can’t live off of the memory of how you feel.” 

When your gaze softens, he knows he got it right. It only took all this time for him to understand what you meant when you said things weren’t working; it was never about a postponed flight. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get it.” 

Your palm comes up to cup his face. Your thumb brushes a wet spot on his cheek. “Oh, Toru. I would never make you compare, I thought you knew that.” 

“I know,” he says. I know. And he does. 

“Sometimes, I just need to know you miss me as much as I miss you. I know you love volleyball,” 

“I love you,” he interrupts. 

“I know you love volleyball,” you continue. “And I would never want you to feel like you had to give any of it up for me. I just need to know that you feel what I feel too.” 

His hands at your waist squeeze, like he’s reassuring you that he does. 

“I know that you won’t be playing in Argentina forever. I was prepared to deal with long-distance for as long as it takes for you to be ready to come home. But-” 

He shakes his head like he doesn’t need you to say it. 

“No, let me say this. But, sometimes it felt like you were settling for how we were. Then… when you postponed the flight, I guess I was just bummed because I was so excited to see you. But you acted like it wasn’t a big deal.” 

Yeah, he did, didn’t he. 

“It felt like you would be just fine substituting me for the sport.” 

“Yeah,” he agrees. 

There’s so much to explain and he’s afraid it would take too long. He needs to tell you that’s not how he feels and that it’s not true at all. And perhaps he’s become self-aware of his ability to grow numb to things like homesickness and he tried to apply that to you too so that he wouldn’t be crippled by the sheer magnitude of how much he truly missed – misses – you. And how appalled he was when he realized he was associating you with memories and nostalgia, as if you were a had-been and not a still-is. 

But you seem to understand because your hands are still gentle on his face and your gaze is affectionate. 

“Stop crying, you baby.” 

“I’m not crying!” he denies. 

“If you don’t stop crying, I won’t kiss you,” you tease. 

He clams up, biting on his lips to stop the hiccups. His eyes roll upwards to the ceiling, willing any tears to stop overflowing. 

You laugh lightly at the sight, voice still clearly weak from your crying marathon. 

He has a lot to apologize for, doesn’t he.

You lean upwards for a kiss. It catches him off guard to this day, how much you can express in your gentle affection. It’s another thing he can’t feel through a screen. 

With each kiss you press on his lips, he counts the things he has to apologize for, but more importantly he counts the things he needs to tell you he misses and loves about you when he inevitably puts the 18,000 kilometers between the two of you again. 

And he’ll do it. Every day. Until the day he finally comes home.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Night Routine ~ MYG

WORD COUNT: 1.4K

GENRE: established relationships, parent AU, cute, fluffy, Yoongi being appreciative of his wife, both of them being adorable for one another

PAIRING: Yoongi x Fem!Reader

⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - January 2024

⤜MASTERLIST

A/N: I’m sorry this came out so short T-T

When you first found out that you were having a baby you'd worried that things were going to be strained between you and Yoongi, but you couldn't have been more wrong. Ever since you told him about the pregnancy he had become one of the most dotting husbands you could have ever asked for, anything you needed - or wanted - you got with only one ask. Though there had been a time in your pregnancy when Yoongi had been a little over the top with you, refusing to let you do anything except rest in bed until your waters broke. 

"He's the cutest baby, ever," Yoongi told the boys as they sat in the living room. It was a few weeks since you'd given birth and it was finally time the uncles met their nephew, which they'd all nicknamed "Little Min".

"I think you're biassed," You giggled as you watched Yoongi rocking back and forth on the rocking chair with your son, his eyes fixated on him as if he could never look away. Yoongi could barely get away from his son, which you loved since you knew there were many parents out there that didn't want anything to do with their kids and you were thankful every day that Yoongi wasn't one of those. 

The man had continued to postpone going back to work after his paternity leave had ended, choosing to use most of his holiday days from work for now and even asking if there was a way he could work from home. Yoongi never wanted to leave little Min's side, or yours for that matter which you found rather cute, though you were going to miss him when HYBE would eventually demand him back at the building. While Yoongi could happily work from home there was eventually going to come to a point where he would have to go back.

There had been a time in his life when work was the only thing that interested him, that if he wasn't working he was sleeping but now all of that was on the back burner as he put his family before everything.

"I will say, Little Min, is very cute." Taehyung chuckled as he looked over Yoongi's shoulder and smiled. The baby boy looked almost identical to you save for his nose which was most definitely your husband's, the boys fell in love the moment you gave birth.

"He'll get mine and Yn's talents all mixed into one tiny package," Yoongi told the boys as you smiled a little, your eyes getting heavier the longer you sat there. It had been a long night last night since Little Min decided he was going to cry every time you left the room to go back to your own bed, in the end, you'd ended up falling asleep on the rocking chair which hadn't been the best decision since now you had a cramp in your neck.

"The baby keeping you up at night, Yn?" Jimin questioned when he noticed that you were starting to slowly nod off on them, you never once complained about the late nights but it was obvious that they were starting to get to you. You were finding it harder and harder to stay awake through the day and you knew it wasn't ideal when you would be alone with your son soon. But it was your job as a mother to stay awake with him in the night and to make sure you could ease him back to sleep.

"He sleeps through the night," Yoongi announced proudly, not knowing the truth, your heart sunk a little as you realised it was going to come out to your husband, that wasn't in fact the case. You'd kept it from him, you knew how hard he worked and you didn't want your son to wake him in the middle of the night so you made sure to go straight away.

"Are you sure? Because Yn looks shattered," Namjoon chuckles, adding a quick "no offensive" at the end as you let out a tired laugh and shake your head. It was true you looked tired and you knew it, god even your bags had bags at this point but you weren't going to complain, not even once.

"Yn?" Yoongi turned himself to look at you, studying you for a moment and realising just how tired you did look and his heart broke a little.

"Does he wake you up?" Yoongi frowned, glancing over at you as you bit down on your lip a little, you didn't hide it from him to be mean or anything like that, it was simply because you wanted him to rest. Yoongi needed his sleep for work, you could always catch up on it the next day while your son napped.

"Only sometimes," You lied, your nose scrunching up as you did so and Yoongi pouted a little. He'd been with you long enough to know the telltale signs of when you were lying and your nose scrunching like that was one of them, 

"Yn," He laughed weakly and shook his head at you, the boys smiled at one another and got up. It was obvious that you and Yoongi needed some time alone to talk about this and they were going to give that to you,

"We'll see you guys later, okay?" Jin asked as he bent down, giving you a tight squeeze as you hugged him back and smiled. The boys had become like brothers to you over the years,

"And if you ever need a babysitter, I'm only down the street," Hobi suggested as he hugged you next, moving to go and give little Min a kiss on the forehead as he fussed a little.

Once the boys had left Yoongi put your son back down to sleep and came to sit beside you on the loveseat, your head fell onto his shoulder and he held onto your hand, running his thumb over your skin. The thought of you doing all of the night feeds and changes crawled into his mind and guilt began to weigh him down,

"Why didn't you tell me he wasn't sleeping through the night? I could have been helping you," He whispered as you shook your head at him,

"You're going back to work soon, I didn't want you to be tired." You mumbled, yawning a little before looking up at Yoongi who seemed dumbfounded,

"I'm his mother, it's my job to be up with him." You mumbled the saying to him. You'd done so much online research and saw just how strong all of the other mothers were with this you knew you had to power through and be that for your son. If other people could stay up through the night and feel fine the next day then you were going to be the same way.

"You're the best mother in the world, that's true but do you know what I am?" He quizzed, moving a little to reach for a blanket to cover you both with, your eyes getting too heavy for you to try and keep open and you let them shut. Snuggling into your husband and letting out a relieved sigh as your body relaxed against his,

"Hmm?" You questioned, too tired to form any actual words at the moment,

"I'm his father which means it is also my job to look after him," He smiles as he notices your body relaxing more and more as you sink into a sleep state,

"And you." His voice seemed to be getting further away as you listened to him, a clear sign you were more tired than you thought and he smiled weakly.

"From now on, we will share the night routine. You're a strong mother Yn and there's no shame in asking for help," He whispered but you were already fast asleep by the time he said it. 

You woke with a jump as you glanced around, you were laid in bed but the last thing you remembered was being on the loveseat with Yoongi, your husband, who wasn't in bed with you.

"Yoongi?" You whispered sliding out of the bed, grabbing your cardigan and making your way to the nursery, stopping in the door frame to see Yoongi who was cradling your son and rocking on the rocking chair inside of the room.

"He was fussing, so I came to put him back to sleep." He whispered, making your heart flutter as you knelt down beside the chair and looked at your two favourite boys in the whole world.

"We share the night routine," He ordered before kissing your cheek and sending you back to your own bed for the rest of the night so you could get some much needed rest.

[bakuhatsufallinlove]

I heard that the japanese fans saying that bkdk was implied is it really true? Can you please explain?!! (I was pretty happy with the ending already, but if it's true I would be ecstatic 🧡💚💖)

I'm not really sure how to answer this. First, I'll direct you to this ask I answered previously about bkdk in the Japanese fandom.

And if you're talking about the same tweets from jpn fans I saw getting shared around, the majority of the comments clearly used emojis, euphemisms, and algorithm-disrupting nicknames for Katsuki and Izuku, which kind of immediately suggests the user is already a bkdk fan. So, I mean... do you go into shipping fan spaces, see people shipping, and decide that means everybody thinks those characters are dating? Probably not, right?

But now that we've got an ending, lemme say outright that bkdk is implied by the base structure of the story. By the characters' thematic arcs. By their words, values, goals, and actions. Regardless of what language they speak, no reader can walk away from MHA without understanding that Izuku and Katsuki are profoundly important to each other.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Izuku loves Katsuki. And by the end of his character arc, there is no way to read Katsuki's actions towards Izuku and not see love, either. The exact nature of that love is up to individual interpretation; this is common for stories outside the romance genre that have complex character relationships, and I encourage you to feel secure in your own reading without external validation.

But if you want to talk about validity, the fact that we don't see either of them say the words "I love you" out loud does not diminish a romantic interpretation.

Just for fun, let's talk a bit about some important history of "implied" romance in shonen manga.

(Spoilers for Urusei Yatsura and Ranma 1/2.)

Takahashi Rumiko, one of the most successful and influential manga creators of all time, famously ended two of her heterosexual romantic comedy plotlines while denying readers a spoken, reciprocated "I love you."

In Urusei Yatsura, Lum spends the entire series actively pursuing Ataru and in the finale, she threatens to erase everyone's memories of her and her fellow aliens if he does not tell her he loves her. The situation makes it impossible for him to win and stop the memory erasing without saying it.

And he still refuses to say it.

He keeps trying to win and avoid losing his memory without saying it; she recognizes his devotion to her when she sees that all this time, he has been carrying something that reminds him of her.

Oh, look at that. I wonder who else spent a long time holding fast to something that represents the time they spent with their loved one?

Lum finally relents and allows Ataru to win, so everyone keeps their memories.

Each of them affirms the intention to be together forever, without using the words "I love you."

WOW I WONDER WHO ELSE WANTED TO BE LOCKED IN A COMBATIVE ENTANGLEMENT OF PURSUIT WITH THE PERSON THEY LOVE FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES.

In Ranma 1/2, Ranma and Akane have been engaged to be married for the whole series, and at a pivotal moment, Ranma thinks the words "I love you," though he does not say them aloud.

Afterwards, Akane finally agrees to let the wedding take place with this as her reasoning:

And Ranma completely objects to having admitted this.

Akane is fucking right, fyi--ignoring everything else that happens in the series, Ranma rescuing her and crying over her injured body while yelling her name might as well be a confession.

Due to ensemble cast chaos, the wedding is postponed again at the end of the manga.

It is worth noting that these series are both in the romantic comedy genre, so their plot devices surrounding love are much more explicit, even if the final execution toys with our expectations. It makes the characters' real feelings obvious while keeping them true to their nature, because that's the core appeal of the relationship to begin with.

As I said, in manga that are not romances, these bonds are often more subtle.

When I said 424 was as good as a confession to me, this is part of why.

Katsuki says he thought they would be together for the rest of their lives. Izuku promises what he can, which is the time he still has the embers of OFA. He may think Katsuki is simply mourning a future where Izuku has OFA, which he can't get back.

In direct response to that exchange, for our finale, we find out Katsuki spent eight years arranging for Izuku to be a pro hero without OFA.

Katsuki beckons Izuku to his side, using the name that used to be an insult, but has since become Izuku's hero name. He reaches out his hand to Izuku, which the reader knows he has wanted to do for so long.

The last image we see might as well be them skipping off into the sunset together, side by side.

Am I supposed to see that as something other than love, just because all their friends are there, too? That seems kinda silly to me.

MHA emphasizes the collective, but that doesn't diminish the individual bonds within it. It goes out of its way to tell us this moment is possible because of Katsuki, because he wants Izuku beside him. We may not get our handhold here, but it is plain to see that Izuku accepts his invitation.

I'm not saying Horikoshi was directly inspired by Takahashi, but her works are an important piece of the narrative language of love within the shonen genre.

Art always reflexively harkens back to what came before it. Whether the creator intends it or not, the audience is reminded of what they've seen before in the cultural landscape of media. Whether or not Horikoshi intended for us to see bkdk as romantic is simply irrelevant to how any given reader is going to see it.

So, if you want permission to think Katsuki and Izuku are in love, you've got mine. tumblr user bakuhatsufallinlove sanctions this epic gay love story. Plus Ultra. You're welcome. <3

[michelle-is-writing]

Wedding Mornings, Spencer Reid

Word Count: 2.2k~

As a child, I always wondered if I would ever find the right person for me. Having no luck to find such a person as a teenager, I ended up wondering if I would even find a husband, better yet, my soul mate. In years to come, I would start to believe that I would be alone forever.

However, once I moved to Washington DC and found a job at the Melvin Gelvin library, I soon befriended a man that visited there a lot. I had seen him in the research section before, but he never came up to my desk for help. I thought he was cute, in all honesty, but I didn't want to come off as too confident and go up to him to see if he needed help when I never did that with anyone else in the library.

So, the one day he did come up to me and ask me where to find a book I had seen him take out many times, I smiled and nodded before helping him find the book. He was nervous asking me his question, and I couldn't help but be a little nervous as well. Although, once we found the encyclopedia for Philosophy, he introduced himself as Spencer Reid, and I couldn't help but rejoice as my name fell from my lips in return. Finally, I got to learn the name of the man who I had shared glances with so many times, yet, we never interacted - up until then.

After that, it felt like a free-game. Anytime Spencer came into the library, he was asking me for books that I knew very well he was aware of where they would be. In spite of this, I always helped him, and after he checked out the third book I had seen him read many times before, Spencer finally asked me out for coffee.

Unfortunately, our date kept getting postponed because of Spencer's job. At first, I thought he was backing out in regret since it had already taken him so long to ask me out in first place. However, once we did go on that date, I discovered that that wasn't even a tiny fraction as to why he kept rescheduling. As soon as I found out that Spencer held such a huge responsibility with a job that relied on him to capture mass murderers and kidnappers, I found myself in complete admiration for him. Not to mention the fact that all of the science books he had been checking out weren't for class or education - he already earned his degrees in those fields beforehand.

Now that I have a dazzling ring on my finger, I'm even happier that I was patient in waiting for Spencer to finally make it to our date. I knew how long I waited for that coffee shop date he promised - six-whole-weeks. However, I never knew how long I was waiting for a man like Spencer to make his way into my life until I found out how much I truly loved him. Through saying those three words that are often said too much, I discovered that I had waited my entire life to find Spencer, and when he proposed to me in Rossi's garden one late night, I found out that Spencer truly felt the same way.

Soon enough, the months before our wedding slowly passed until the brightest week of our lives came up, and once that started, it was like everything was going at twice the speed it should have been going. All of my bridesmaids (JJ, Emily, (f/n), and Penelope) ran around like chickens with their heads cut off while Spencer's groomsmen (Derek, Aaron, and Rossi) did the same. Even during the morning of my wedding, everyone was running around to get things done while I just stayed in my bride's quarter's kitchen and did the same thing I did every other morning.

"I'm just saying," Penelope starts, watching as I pour freshly made coffee into a mug for Spencer. "It's bad luck for a groom to see the bride before the wedding!" She reminds me, causing me to smile.

"I thought that was only if the bride was wearing her dress," I point out, adding more sugar than actual coffee into the mug. "And, besides," I add, giving the coffee one last stir before placing the spoon down on the counter. I have no idea how Spencer can drink this stuff with nearly half of the mug filled with sugar.

Turning toward Penelope with the steaming mug in hand, my eyes quickly catch onto the expertly made bouquet in her hands, every flower I wanted beautifully bundled together with a gorgeous (f/c) bow wrapped around the stems. How is she so good at any creative thing she does?

"I've made Spencer his coffee every morning since our first day living together, Pen," I tell her, smiling as I think about the fond memory. Sometimes he'll make me a cup too if I haven't done so myself. "I don't want to miss a day because of some old, wise tale that's probably been taken out of its original context," I add, slightly smirking as I know that's the truth. Once the words leave my mouth, Penelope can't resist the smile the makes it's way onto her lips as she shakes her head.

"Well, I don't think anything I say is going to stop you," She notes, earning a head nod back from me. She's right. Nothing is going to make me halt in my actions of bringing Spencer his coffee - not even a silly little fairytale.

Heading out of the hotel room in only my silk pajamas that match the rest of the girls' clothes, I find myself walking across the hall with my heart pounding in my chest. It's strange to just now realize that today is the official start of my forever. It's a fantastic feeling, but at the same time, it's giving me a high that I feel like I can't come down from. It's a dangerous, yet blissful thing.

Just as I round the corner to walk to the other end of the hall, my eyes quickly catch onto a familiar figure leaving his hotel room. There's no way I could ever forget those brunet curls or the slender body of the man I love. Although, what is a bit odd is that he's currently carrying a coffee mug of his own. I guess he didn't think that I'd stick to what we've always done.

"Good morning, handsome," I greet Spencer, causing him to lightly jump before turning around and seeing me. Once his eyes land on my pajama covered figure, he visibly calms down with a small sigh and smile.

"I wanted to go and see you, but the guys wouldn't let me. So, I had to sneak out," Spencer explains with a shake of his head, making me laugh. Just as I do that, Spencer's whole demeanor changes as if he's softening up. His tense shoulders loosen while his posture relaxes a bit, another sigh leaving his slightly smiling lips as he does so. He looks calmer than any other time I can remember.

"You... you look amazing," he compliments me, causing me to blush with a wide smile. My hair is an absolute mess right now, a majority of it up in a clip as I haven't brushed it yet. Not to mention my face doesn't even have a touch of makeup on it and I'm still in pajamas - there's nothing about me that says "amazing" right now. I don't know how Spencer can say such things.

"Thank you, baby," I tell him, taking a few steps forward before planting a kiss to his cheek. Despite today being the day of our wedding, Spencer's cheeks turn to light pink in response to my lips touching them as they always do, and I can't help but smile as I see the rose color take over his skin. Despite what some people say, I truly believe there's a good chance it will always be this way.

"I made you coffee for this morning," I tell him, gesturing to the steaming mug in my hand. "But I didn't know you made your own already," I further add, watching as the corner of Spencer's lip quirks up. Is he surprised that I would do this?

"Actually," he starts, holding the cup out to me. "I made this for you - that's why I was heading out of the room so I could go and give it to you," Spencer explains, trading mugs with me as a bright smile takes over his face. "I'm glad that we both had the same idea."

Smiling back, I nod before taking a sip from the cup of coffee Spencer made me, Spencer following in suit with the cup that I made him. We both let out a small, satisfied groan as the taste of coffee reaches our lips.

"You always manage to make my coffee perfect," Spencer points out, making my heart clench. He's so adorable, and he doesn't even realize it.

"And I'll never forget it, love, not for a long time," I tell him, leaning closer to kiss his cheek. However, before I can do so, Spencer takes the chance to wrap his free arm around me and pull me against him. Now satisfied, Spencer gives off a small hum before leaning down and pressing his lips to mine. In his arms, I feel the happiest I've felt this morning, and with the events of today being added in, I am more than ecstatic right now. Making coffee for Spencer every morning for the rest of my life is only a small fraction of what our marriage is going to be, and I can't help but look forward to doing it.

"I'm so glad we're doing this," Spencer confesses, pulling away from my lips to rest his nose against mine. Smiling, I gently sigh as I feel his hand on my waist sliding underneath my pajama top and onto my skin. His touch is so gentle that I could almost mistake it for a cloud touching me. "I've waited so long for this."

"I wish we would've done it sooner," I admit, nuzzling the side of my face into Spencer's soft sleep shirt. "Then I could've been Mrs. Reid for a long time now," I point out, turning my eyes up to the smiling man holding me.

"I do like the sound of that," Spencer murmurs, smirking as he leans farther down to press his lips to my neck. "Misses Reid," He slowly says my new title, each syllable rolling off his tongue smoothly. Even before we were engaged, he would jokingly call me that, but now that I'm actually Mrs. Reid, my love for the name has only grown.

With that, Spencer and I connect our lips in another sweet kiss while holding each other close. In his arms, I feel the warmest and happiest I have ever been. Nothing could ruin this moment between us. It's simply too perfect.

"Stop making out in the hallway! You'll be doing enough of that later!" A stern voice interrupts us, causing Spencer and me to look over to the hotel room door he stepped out of a few seconds ago. Hanging out of the empty doorway is Derek who's smirking with an accusing eyebrow. "Isn't it bad luck to see the bride before the ceremony?"

"Actually, Derek, it's only bad luck if-" Spencer argues Derek just as another voice cuts in.

"What are you two doing?!" A shout sounds throughout the hall, the tone full of Penelope Garcia's typical sassiness. Immediately, both of our heads shoot toward the end of the hall where the spunky blonde stomps toward us. "What have you two been doing?!"

"Derek, help us," I beg, turning my head back to Spencer's best man. Instead of doing what I actually asked, Derek laughs and shakes his head while holding his hands up.

"Oh no," he starts, "I'm not suffering at the hands of the woman behind you."

"Yeah," Penelope states, matter-of-factly. "I would be scared too if I were you, missy," just as soon as the words leave her lips, Penelope puts her hand on my arm and practically drags me out of Spencer's arms while Derek does the same to Spencer, both mindful of the mugs in our hands.

"You can see your beautiful bride in a couple of hours," Derek assures my soon-to-be-husband while he gives me one last kiss. As soon as his lips touch mine, I realize this is the last kiss before the one kiss we get to share that marks our forever with each other. Plus, I have no doubt that our friends will be cheering and teasing us as we do so - just like Derek and Penelope do right now. Just at the single thought, I can hardly wait.

[neptunes-sol-angel]

Just a little reminder that everyone has a feminine and masculine side, so don't hesitate to read the messages for your masculine side too.

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Pile One 🕺

BEYONCÉ - COZY

Right away, I’m detecting that this pile is trying to work through some bitterness and that’s ok. I get the gist that this collective is aware of this and are either accepting of it or in denial of it because of the assumption that it’s embarrassing or demeaning to feel that way. I always want to remind people that it’s okay to feel negative emotions. Having them is not what defines you but how you choose to express them is how it truly characterizes you. It feels like this brooding energy is like a seesaw or a visual representation of tug of war, because it’s happening in two different directions. This pile could be in limbo with trying to reach the other side of realizing your self-worth. There’s bitterness split into two directions. Acerbic agony over “why not me?” in terms of finding people who accept and match the love that you give to others and “why me?” when it comes to jealousy and vitriol that makes you afraid of your own potential for success and dim your light. What your feminine side is asking of you is to stop watering yourself down because you feel it’s safer that way to be under others. Take note of the vibe that you get from this channeled song because it’s time to get “cozy” with who you are and take some initiative in the lessons that you’ve been through by talking your shit. You sat with your pain long enough to know its beginning but to finally decide how YOU want to create its end. If you’re in a funk where it’s making you feel meek and want to self-sabotage, reach deep inside yourself to know that the answer isn’t to revert back to old patterns and lies that people told you to keep you stuck because they don’t want to see you grow. Get cozy with yourself because you must understand that every step of the way isn’t going to be comfortable all of the time but I feel that a lot of you are at a point where things are getting worse before they get better. It could be something external going on, but I feel that it’s mostly mental. You’re going to come out of this even stronger than before and you’re going to move differently and choose differently but also get an upgrade relating to speech. How you talk to yourself will improve, you’ll speak with more confidence, and your words will match exactly with your feelings when it comes to communicating with others. The main thing that I am seeing here is no longer trying to make accommodations that make you suffer in the end just to protect another person’s ego.

Pile Two 🕺

BEYONCÉ -MOVE

I’m sensing a lot of completion with this pile. If you’re not in this new energy yet, prepare for people making a lot of misconceptions about you. You could be accused of being aloof or have people nitpicking or trying to diagnose you based on little to no evidence. It doesn’t have to be this exact situation but what I first would like to point out is that it’s like, you’re floating down this river, unphased, and just flowing with the currents. Or that you’re water itself, becoming mutable with your form but regardless of what changes are made, you’re still water. If you’ve experienced intense feelings over people ghosting you or just not prioritizing you in the past, I’m seeing that you’ll be at a stage where you understand that what those people did wasn’t at all right and you’re no longer internalizing it with your thoughts and actions, but in other words, you’re not going to be that person anymore that’s waiting for a text. You’re not going to wait for people to act right, wait for other people’s approval, or postpone your life for people who like to play with your time. I’m getting the message that you shouldn’t stop yourself from doing whatever it is that you think about doing because “they will talk about you either way”. This could apply to promoting yourself in some way, maybe for a new job opportunity, or just taking a chance to improve your health. You may have anxiety of thinking that maybe there’s no point in trying to see what you can do for your body because you’ve been stagnant for years because of circumstances that weren’t really in your control, like finances or being dependent on a toxic parent. This could also be something else, but either way it’s like you’re afraid of what you could hear, possibly something negative or even just a “no”, but I’m hearing you can’t make that judgment without trying, because you might actually receive a yes, assistance in getting back on your feet again, or good news about your timing in getting something done before you could miss out on what’s important.

Pile Three 🕺

BEYONCÉ - CUFF IT

A rebirth is needed for this pile. There’s a lot of indulgence that feels mindless and endless because you’re seeking to satiate a need or needs but there are people who are already aware of this but are in need of confirmation for which way is the right direction to go. It’s about experiencing everything for the first time all over again. Not in a dreadful way to make you suffer, but to soothe any worries over not finding happiness if you don’t have that “one thing”. If you’ve been tested recently on remaining brave in your decision to part ways with someone but are having second doubts or the fear that you’re going to miss out, maybe that “need” that you have can be replenished by just being around your family to remind yourself that you aren’t lacking love and support around you. If you’re feeling “sexual”, maybe it isn’t sex that you necessarily need and that it’s just your soul telling you to create. If you’ve been used to seeking answers through spiritual measures but are still left confused, then maybe that’s a sign that it’s time to step back and take a break from the unseen and to come back and relearn how to go through life from just being instead of trying to know everything. Even if it isn’t those specific scenarios previously mentioned, you’re on a journey of wisdom of learning that a lot of the things that you’ve considered as losses haunting your everyday life, were not really losses, because they can be replaced by something else that’s going to lead you into falling more in love with yourself.

[space-invading-pigeon]

Steve came home from work one day pissed as hell. His coworker had made three of his little ones cry, the service dog that was supposed to visit the long-term patients was cancelled last minute, Dustin texted him to cancel their weekly phone call because he and Suzie were fighting, Hopper had to postpone his monthly check-in because El caught a stomach bug at school, and Mrs. Ryans stopped him in the lobby to tell him that she's praying his "no good devil worshipping roommate" received the damnation he supposedly deserves.

So Steve burst into his home, fuming, face flushed red in his anger, and startled poor Eddie out of his armchair. "I called Mrs. Ryans a stupid old hag and I'm not apologizing!" He announced, practically throwing his shoes into their proper place. "She's stupid and I hope she breaks her other hip."

Eddie started his usual task of making brownies (he's a firm believer that chocolate can make anything better, and he knows that Steve's got an almost pavlovian response to the smell of brownies now) while Steve changes out of his scrubs and into something more comfortable. He'd completely bypassed his own closet, instead stealing one of Eddie's prized Iron Maiden tees to go with his threadbare pajama bottoms. Eddie opened his mouth to ask what had happened that day to make Steve so upset, but Steve didn't let him.

"Seriously, why does she hate you so much? You're like the sweetest person ever. So I told her to stop talking shit about you, and she was like, 'why should I,' so I told her that my baby sister would slap the wig off her bald little head if she kept being shitty to my boyfriend, and I might have actually given her a heart attack. Should we go check on her?" Eddie froze at Steve's admission; first of all, a baby sister?? But, more pressing, boyfriend. "Oh, my god, I might have killed our elderly neighbor. El wouldn't actually slap her! Wait, yes she would. She's still learning social norms and I don't think Hop told her that hitting old people is frowned on. I don't- does Hop know not to hit old people? Eddie, my dad might abuse the elderly."

"Stevie, honey, slow down," he finally settled on. Eddie bypassed their little dining table to sit Steve on the couch. "One thing at a time. Mrs. Ryans is not dead, we'd have heard all the munchkins singing by now."

"I'm not going to prison for shocking our neighbor to death, Eddie, I'd rather be melted into a giant flesh monster," Steve piped up. Eddie didn't have time to unpack whatever that meant, so he ignored it.

"You're talking about your sister like she's not used to humans."

"She's not, really. She was ex- she was, um, bad home life. Before we met. She's Hopper's daughter now, but before, her dad fucked her up. Like, doomsday, raise the children in isolation, fucked up." Steve was marginally calmer, but his anger gave way to nerves as everything he'd said caught up with him. "I called you my boyfriend."

"Good to know you've got beauty and brains, sweetheart," Eddie cooed at him, smacking an exaggerated kiss to his cheek. "Not every day I have such a cute guy screaming at old ladies for me."

"J-just the one old lady. You're not mad I called you my boyfriend?" Eddie paused there, giving Steve the flattest stare he could manage.

"Steve. I've been flirting with you for two years. Bruce has been trying to get me to propose to you for one of those two years."

"Bruce just had a baby, he should worry about-"

"Bruce tried to explain to you that we're dating and you called him a funny guy, honey. Congrats, you're the last to know."

"We're dating?" Steve shrieked, and Eddie couldn't help but laugh. Steve's face was so incredulous, like he really had no idea, and as sad as it was to see that, it was just too funny to Eddie that they'd been dating in almost every sense for more than a year before Steve seemed to be aware of it. "Are you telling me I could have kissed you this whole time?"

"Well, yeah, obviously. Stevie, you really didn't know? I thought it was obvious how much I love you, sweetheart."

[alisonfelixwrites]

the deal - part 3/3 (*) [harry styles au]

//

part one, part two

summary: in which harry and claire continue to fight for custody of atlas while also attempting to take steps in their own relationship

word count: 12,756

content warning: custody battle! heavy topics of child neglect, physical/emotional abuse, mentions of drug use, etc. smut!!

___________________________________________

“Claire?” Harry softly asked, waiting outside the door she locked herself into.

His eyes softly closed, forehead resting against the wood as he heard retching and vomiting from the other side. Harry wore a dress shirt and slacks, dressing up for court even if he wasn’t being heard or if the judge would hardly look at him.

But he wanted to be here for Claire, even if she insisted she was fine coming on her own.

Seeing her rush into the restrooms before the hearing even started, was enough proof to Harry that she was most definitely not fine.

“Babe?” He checked again, breathing out the word in defeat as there was silence from the other end. He heard her slightly coughing and then he heard the flushing of the toilet before Claire unlocked the door, wiping her eyes and straightening out her blouse.

Her eyes were rimmed red and the bags underneath them seemed to have darkened a shade. She fixed the clip in her hair while sniffling, “Sorry.” She muttered, walking past Harry and towards the sinks to wash her hands and rinse her mouth a bit. 

Harry looked at her through the mirror as he slipped a gentle hand to her lower back, “‘S okay. You don’t have to apologize.”

Even Atlas and Finn had noticed this morning, that something was up. Tensions in the house were at an all time high any time Claire was supposed to head to court and face Evan. It wasn’t the first time, but him and his lawyer always found ways to postpone or buy themselves time.

And in the meantime, Claire and Evan had to stick to what the court told them - which was that Atlas spent at least six hours at his father’s house every other Saturday. Claire always dreaded dropping him off but insisted walking him up to the door. Evan never looked good. He always had a sick, smug smile on his lips. He wasn’t doing this for Atlas, he was just doing it to get a rise out of her.

She remembered crying in Harry’s car the last time because once Claire had hugged Atlas goodbye and he went inside, Evan said to her that he’d do everything he could to stay in control of her life before slamming the door.

After a good cry, it was time to convince Harry to not go knocking on his door and then punch his teeth out. But Harry’s hands had tightly gripped the steering wheel as they drove home in silence, and both him and Claire weren’t themselves in those six hours.

Evenings were then spent with Atlas cuddling up to both of them, even Finn. He regressed to being a little baby on those days, sucking his thumb and needing a soft scalp massage before he requested for Harry to carry him to bed and then Harry and Claire both tucked him in. 

He usually had nightmares those nights, but not as bad as the nights before he was supposed to be at Evan’s. Atlas never said much about the time spent at his father’s house, and Claire and Harry didn’t pry.

And so months went on, and here she was again. With fresh hope that the judge would make a conscious decision to cut ties between Atlas and his father. That they could finally see the effect it had on Atlas and that Evan didn’t give a single fuck about his son.

“I love you.” Harry murmured from behind her, finally pulling Claire into his chest and she allowed him. Claire exhaled into his neck, pinching her eyes shut to keep more tears from falling out. Harry’s arms felt like a warm blanket surrounding her, and she was catapulted into memories of comfort and warmth as she leaned against him. And she let herself lean against him - which was almost the biggest challenge of all.

“I love y-you too.” She croaked out, sniffling. Harry kissed her temple, “And I’m so proud of you. Atlas will remember this forever, the way you fought for him. I promise.”

Claire quickly nodded, “Yeah.” She agreed, trying to remember what she was doing this for. Or who she was doing this for. Future Atlas. To give him peace. To know she did everything in her power to make him happy and give him a brighter future.

“We have to go in now,” Harry’s heart sank a bit as he pulled Claire back a bit and cupped her cheeks, “sorry.” He murmured. Claire swallowed and nodded, “Okay. Do you have gum?”

“Yeah.” He patted his pockets and pulled out a packet of gum, “Here. Your breath doesn’t smell, by the way.” He reassured her in a small joke. Claire huffed out a humourless chuckle and popped the gum in her mouth. Lacing their fingers together, Harry and Claire exited the ladies rooms to head to where they were supposed to be.

“There you are.” Timothy - their lawyer - exhaled a breath of relief. He was the new lawyer Claire had been working with ever since she started dating Harry. She only admitted it to herself with pink cheeks, but Timothy was the kind of lawyer she was unable to afford with her own money. 

Harry didn’t mind spending his own money on help for Claire or Atlas. They were his family, and no length was too far for him to go to, to ensure their safety and happiness. Besides, he had more money than he could spend after working full-time after Astrid’s departure and hardly having a social life.

Claire’s stubbornness made her reluctant to always accept Harry’s financial help, but it was for the greater good.

“Sorry.” Claire cleared her throat, “I wasn’t feeling too well.”

“Nervous?” Timothy checked and Claire nodded, holding onto Harry’s hand who gave her a gentle squeeze, “Mhm.”

Timothy rested a hand on her shoulder, “We’re doing good, Claire. We have accusations for a lot of things, and Evan is unable to give a decent response to all of them.” He tried to soothe her.

Claire just swallowed thickly and nodded, “Yeah.” She sighed.

The next twenty minutes were pure hell for Claire once more. She went into the courtroom, feeling Harry’s presence behind her as the judge stared at both her and Evan, and their lawyers.

Claire felt fidgety the entire time, but trusted Timothy, who did a splendid job. Of course, Evan and his lawyer played it just as dirty and kept bringing up Claire’s past in drug use and how she was really only back on track ever since being with Harry. How she had to split her attention between Atlas and Finn and how that caused her to not be fully there for their son.

Claire saw red at that and jumped up her feet, briskly turning towards Evan and firing at him, asking him if he even knew Atlas’ birthday.

The judges’ brows had raised high when Evan shamefully spoke out the wrong date.

But, in true Evan-fashion, he did buy himself more time to get his life on track.

A social inquiry.

His lawyer suggested it and the judge blindly agreed. Tears prickled in Claire’s eyes when she realized what it meant. More months of this. More court dates, more conversations, a social worker coming to their house to talk to her, Harry and Atlas.

Just to verify what everyone actually already knew.

Claire felt defeated when Harry drove them home, his hand on her thigh and the music turned down.

“It’s gonna be okay.” He murmured once the engine was turned off and they were in the driveway of the house. Claire turned her head to face him, offering him a faint smile as she nodded, “I know. Thank you.”

Harry felt a bit stupid, unsure of what the right thing to say was. There weren’t really any good things to say to a mother in this position. And Claire was such a damn good mother, she didn’t deserve any of this.

Harry chewed the inside of his cheek, “I love you.” He repeated.

Claire nodded again as her bottom lip wobbled, “I love you too, Harry.”

They stayed in silence in the car for a bit until heading inside. The boys were at school and they had a few hours to themselves. Claire did her usual routine after going to court, changing into gym clothes to go on a long run. Harry on the other hand, threw himself into work. 

He sat at his desk, drawing and erasing and drawing and erasing as he got a job to design a new office building for a bank.

He was hunched over, a concentrated frown on his face when Claire walked back in, sweat pearling at her hairline and her eyes still hollow and tired. She panted out after her run, heading into the kitchen for water and to do some stretching.

Harry leaned against the doorpost, watching her as she chugged down water and used the back of her hand to wipe her forehead. She felt his presence behind her and turned around, leaning against the countertop, “Hey.”

“Hey.” Harry exhaled, “Do you - uh… do you want to shower together? Before the boys get home?”

Claire’s stomach dropped a bit. She knew the tone of his voice and she knew what he meant. Harry meant to say they weren’t themselves right now and needed some comfort and closeness within each other to be there for the boys when they came home in a bit. And he was right.

Claire nodded, “That sounds good. Are you finishing up or can we go now?”

“Now is good.” Harry smiled. Him and Claire headed up to their bathroom, stripping themselves of their clothes before hopping into the cabin. Harry took the time in soothing Claire. He washed her hair and soaped her in, hugging her close to his chest and she allowed him to wrap her up and comfort her. 

She pushed up her toes to kiss him deeply, expressing her gratitude for his endless patience without using words. Because she didn’t know how. She didn’t know what to say to explain how he made her feel, or what he did for her. 

“Claire - wait.” Harry breathed when her hand closed around his semi hard length, gently pumping up and down. She moaned against his lips, “No, let me… i want to.” She reassured him. Harry’s cheeks flushed slightly and he leaned back against the tiled wall, swallowing, “I’m not trying to be a dick.” He defended his erection and Claire nodded in understanding. Harry swallowed again, “‘S just because I’m close to you.”

“I know. It’s okay.” She smiled slightly. Harry didn’t want to ruin the moment. He couldn’t help getting hard when he saw Claire naked with wet drops running down her smooth skin. He knew this wasn’t really the time or place and he hadn’t expected her to act upon it, but she did and she wanted to.

Harry usually got hard whenever they showered together. It didn’t mean at all that it always turned to this. His head thudded back with a small whimper when Claire sunk down to her knees, water cascading down her back as she took him in her mouth. Harry’s hands balled into fists as he panted out, “Shit - babe…” His hand involuntary found the back of her neck, giving a thankful squeeze when she sucked him off.

Claire took him deep, her tongue salaciously running over his shaft and feeling the veins pulsing against her hollowed-out cheeks. She hummed around him, revelling in the feeling of his heavy cock pushing in her throat as she fought her gag-reflex to deepthroat him. Harry whined out, taking a fistful of her hair as he arched slightly and pushed his hips forward to thrust into her mouth.

“Fuck,” He gasped, “fuck - fuck. C’mere - stop, c’mere.” He yanked her hair, making Claire yelp slightly as she popped off of him suddenly. She coughed slightly as Harry helped her up, supporting Claire who felt woozy on her legs.

“Can I?” Harry spoke against her lips, pushing her against the opposite wall while grabbing her thighs to lift her up. Claire hardly had time to nod as her legs locked around his hips and Harry slipped inside of her. He grunted, forehead dropping to her shoulder as he pressed his lips into her collarbone and Claire moaned at the feeling of him inside of her.

Her hand tightly grabbed his wet hair as Harry fucked into her. Slow yet sharp and deep. She loved it when he took her like this - affectionate and loving yet mindblowingly good. They were engulfed by steam, and Claire admired the bulging of Harry’s biceps as he seemingly effortlessly kept her lifted up.

“So good.” Claire squeaked when his tip brushed her g-spot and the coil in her tummy tightened. She brushed his hair away and they breathily kissed as Harry sped up a bit, “Please - cum…” He groaned, “I need you to cum.”

Claire nodded as she bucked her hips back, “Uh-h-huh, almost there.” She panted. Only a minute later, both were panting and spent. Harry’s softening cock pulsed between her walls as he kept her up for a bit until gently letting her down. He slipped out of her and Claire held his arms for a bit of balance before she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and deeply kissed him.

“Love of my life.” She smiled against his lips and Harry chuckled, immediately feeling how much lighter the mood had become. Sex was important to them to feel close to one another. They had to pick their moments, which is why something practical - like showering or cooking - could turn into fucking in no time.

The found ways, knowing how detrimental it was to their relationship to feel the physical comfort of the other. Claire hummed as they kissed and Harry nuzzled his nose with hers while running his hands up and down her naked back, “Are you ovulating?” He whispered.

Claire bit her lip and shook her head, “No - uh… this was just for fun.”

“Right.” Harry chuckled, giving her ass a small pinch, “well, it was definitely fun.”

Four months now they had been trying. Actively. Not like before, not leaving it up to the universe, but really tracking her period and trying. Every month she took a pregnancy test and so far - every month it came back negative.

It was fine, for now. Their spirits weren’t broken down. So much was happening with Atlas and Evan too, that Claire didn’t necessarily mind. She somehow felt like she wouldn’t be able to feel joyous about a pregnancy with everything looming over her head.

And Claire didn’t know this, but it was also the reason Harry hadn’t proposed yet.

When he asked her to marry him, he wanted it to be just them. Him, Claire, Finn and Atlas. No Evan.

He soothed himself with the idea that they had time. They had so much fucking time to spend with one another. A lifetime. And perhaps it was nicer if the boys were a bit older, so they could really be a part of the wedding and give their blessing.

“My sweet,” Harry murmured with a smile on his lips, “I adore you.”

Claire giggled and the sound made Harry’s heart skip ten beats. She kissed his lips once more, “I adore you more. Just not your cum running down my leg. Scoot over a bit, I need the stream.” And playful Claire was back. Harry threw his head back in a laugh when she was back to her witty, sarcastic self.

He loved her like that. She was most herself like that. They waddled back a few steps until the water took care of Harry’s orgasm and then exited the shower.

“Wanna pick up the boys together?” Harry suggested. Claire puckered her lips, “You can go, I’ll get started on dinner. That way I won’t have to be in the kitchen too much tonight.”

Harry fought the amused smile on his lips and exhaled a chuckling breath, “Let’s do it the other way around. You pick them up, I’ll cook.”

“Hey, my cooking is not that bad.” 

“No, but mine is better.” Harry stuck out his tongue and Claire playfully swatted his chest, “Ass. I’ll see you in a bit.” She pushed up her toes for a quick kiss. Her hair was wet and laying down her back as she wore jeans and a hoodie. Snatching Harry’s keys off of the table, she unlocked the Tesla to pick up Finn and Atlas.

In the presence of both boys, Claire quickly forgot all about what today had been so far. Atlas and Finn were laughing and joking in the backseat, cracking Claire up at what they all said. They brought out the best in each other and it was incredible to see.

Much like Harry and Claire’s dynamic, Finn tamed Atlas a bit while Atlas brought out Finn’s - hidden - wild side. Finn was the calm and Atlas was the storm. Much like Harry being the calm and Claire being the storm.

“Claire bear, can you help me with my shoes?” Finn lisped a little and Claire fought the rolling of her eyes. She could hear Harry laughing from the kitchen and Claire crouched down to undo his laces, “Finnigan, I love it when you call me Claire bear except that I don’t.” She chuckled. Finn frowned in confusion and Claire’s heart melted at his expression, so she just quickly kissed his forehead, “Never mind. I love you.”

“I love you too, mama.”

Claire melted more. Finn was experimenting with different nicknames for her. Both Harry and Claire had made it clear to him that he was in no way obligated to call her mum. But Finn wanted to. Besides that, Harry also taught him the horrendous Claire bear nickname and she always silently gagged upon hearing it.

Harry thought it was absolutely hilarious.

“That’s my reward for blowing you in the shower?” She hushed the whisper while being with Harry in the kitchen, the boys in the living room. Harry stirred the food and bit his lip to fight his beaming grin. Cocking up an eyebrow, he dipped his head for a chaste kiss, “Your reward was an orgasm, you little brat.”

Claire childishly stuck out her tongue and went through the boys’ backpacks of the day and clearing out their lunchboxes.

Yet Claire dreaded the evening. She wanted to be transparent with Atlas about today and about his father, so while Harry tucked Finn in later that night, she sat on Atlas’ bed.

He was cuddled into his side as they read a book together and eventually Claire closed it, “Can I talk to you?” She ran her fingers through his shaggy blonde hair - which was darkening just a little bit as he aged.

Atlas looked up to her and nodded, “Yes.” Somehow by the tone of her voice and the way she asked him, he sensed what the topic would be.

Claire shifted a bit, nibbling her lip, “I saw your daddy today.”

Atlas’ expression dropped a bit and Claire continued, “You know I see him sometimes, right? In that big building? With the judge?”

“Who’s the judge again?”

“The judge is a very important person who makes very important decisions. Sometimes your daddy and I have to go see the judge. The judge asks us how you are and if you’re happy with mum and happy with dad.” Claire tried to explain.

Atlas nodded slowly, “And what do you say?”

“I tell her you’re happy here.” She shrugged before continuing to play with his hair, “Are you? Happy?”

“Yes.” Atlas smiled, cuddling further into Claire - who already got tears in her eyes. She swallowed thickly, “With me and Finn and daddy Harry?”

“Yes!” Atlas spoke with more enthusiasm and Claire sniffled once before cupping his cheek, “That’s all I want, bubby. You know I’d do everything to make you happy, right? I love you so much. More than anything or anyone.”

Atlas studied her face for a bit, “More than daddy Harry?”

“More than daddy Harry.” Claire nodded without missing a beat. Atlas didn’t seem particularly relieved or alarmed at her answer, but just nodded. Claire took a breath, “And then the judge asks the same question to your daddy. She asks daddy if you’re happy there.”

“And what does he say?” Atlas murmured. Claire kept the wobbling of her lip under control, “Daddy says you’re happy there.”

Atlas frowned, “I’m not.”

“I know.” She whispered. Atlas pressed his lips together, “How long do I still have to go?”

“As long as the judge tells us.” Claire explained and Atlas tilted his head to the side, “But how? I don’t know this juds.”

“Judge.” Claire softly corrected him and Atlas exhaled a breath, “Judge.” He tried to repeat, but it was a difficult word for him to pronounce. Claire’s heart shattered when she was once more reminded of Atlas’ young age. He was supposed to be young and free and careless. But he wasn’t. Instead, he knew his mum and dad were fighting and there were two groups of people who claimed to want the best for him. He knew of the judge. He was too young for this. He had seen too much, heard too much.

Atlas looked at her through big eyes, “How long do I still have to go, mummy?” He repeated in a watery voice, “Why can’t I just stay here with you and daddy Harry and Finn?” He clung to her and Claire hastily wiped her tears, “I know, bub. I know. I love you so much.” She repeated.

“I love you.” Atlas murmured, “I don’t want to go anymore. I don’t like it.”

“I know.” Claire’s voice cracked and she blinked rapidly to keep from crying too much. Pulling Atlas into her chest, her face scrunched up as she silently cried, out of sight for him. “You understand that I’m trying?” She whispered, “Me and daddy Harry are trying so hard for you, to keep you here and safe and happy. With us.”

“I understand.” Atlas nodded.

“Good boy.” Claire kissed the top of his head. She sniffled a few times before taking a breath, “So today daddy and I had to go back to see the judge. And the judge said she’s going to send someone here.”

Atlas didn’t respond, and Claire could imagine him frowning in confusion. She closed her eyes, “Someone is going to come here. A nice person, who just wants to talk to you a little bit. I won’t be there for that.” She gently explained, “They’ll want to sit with you and they’ll ask you a few questions. And you can tell them whatever you want, okay? There’s no need to be scared or to be nervous. They just want to know how you’re doing.”

It was silent for a moment before Atlas spoke, “When?”

“I don’t know yet.” Claire admitted, “It might be a while. Do you have any questions?”

Atlas flicked his eyes up, and Claire saw a range of emotions in them. “Can I sleep in the big bed tonight?” 

Claire raised her brows and clearly hesitated, “Y-You want to sleep in the big bed?” She clarified. Atlas quickly nodded, “Mhm. For when I have a nightmare.”

“Bub.” She whispered, rocking him back and forth a little, “But you’re a big boy, aren’t you? Big boys sleep in their own beds.” She tried but Atlas whined a bit and crawled closer into her. Claire felt a fresh wave of tears running down her cheeks and she cleared her throat, “Can you wait just a minute? I’m going to have a chat with daddy Harry first.” She whispered.

Atlas just nodded and cuddled his stuffed animal as Claire quickly turned around and rushed out of the room. She was barely in the hallway when she pressed her hand to her mouth, stifling the deep sob and the feeling of nausea. She could throw up all over again when imagined the fear running through her little boy.

Claire’s legs could hardly keep her up and she slid down the wall next to Atlas’ closed door. Just thinking of him in his bed, clutching his stuffed animal that Harry gave him because he craved comfort so much.

“Hey,” Harry whispered, worry apparent on his face when he hurried over to where Claire was. He just tucked Finn and closed his door after reading him a bedtime story. Harry’s hands cupped Claire’s cheeks, “Babe - what’s wrong?” He urgently whispered, attempting not to alert their boys.

“A-Atlas.” Claire sobbed, feeling the burning in her chest, “I don’t want him to see me like this.”

“Oh - shh.” Harry crooned, “Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.” He slipped an arm around Claire’s waist and used his might to pull her up to a standing position. She clung to him and Harry smoothed his hand over her hair, “‘S okay, baby.” He shushed softly.

Claire sniffled, “He asked to sleep in our bed.”

“Shit.” Harry murmured and Claire nodded, “Mhm. It’s so bad, Harry.”

He stroked her hair again, “What did you say?”

“Nothing.” Claire whimpered, “Not yet. W-Wanted to talk to you first.”

Harry exhaled, “Babe, if he’s begging to sleep with us… we should let him, right?”

“Mhm. I think so too. But I didn’t want to decide without you.”

Harry nodded, “It’s okay. I’ll go carry him to our bed.”

“Okay.” Claire nodded, wiping her eyes, “I’m gonna just freshen up a bit, don’t want Atlas to see me like this.” 

Harry cupped her cheeks and kissed her nose, “Alright. You go ahead, I’ll be right there with him.”

Claire nodded and they parted ways as Harry slowly opened up Atlas’ bedroom door. He sat in his bed like a small boy, clutching his stuffed giraffe that Harry gifted him. The sight was heartbreaking. Harry was slow as he walked up to him, “Hey, bubby. Mum says you’d like to sleep in our bed tonight?”

“Yeah.” Atlas nodded and Harry offered him a small smile, “Okay. Want me to carry you?”

Atlas just lifted up an arm, a silent invitation for Harry to break his back and pick up the seven year-old. Atlas was way too big to be picked up like this, but Harry humored him. He patted his back as he turned down the lights in Atlas’ room and carried him through the hall. He made a quick stop at Finn’s door - not wanting him to feel left out.

Finn wasn’t asleep yet and blinked his eyes open as Harry stood in the doorway, “Hi, bud. Sleepover tonight?” He questioned. Finn frowned, “But it’s not a Friday or Saturday.”

“I know.” Harry nodded, “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. But Atlas is sleeping in the big bed tonight.”

Atlas and Finn shared a look, and Finn nodded, grabbing his own baby blanket before he followed behind Harry and Atlas. Harry was gentle when he laid Atlas down - mostly on Claire’s side. He immediately sunk into the pillow she usually rested on and Finn was exceptionally gentle too. 

“They’re both in bed.” Harry murmured as he joined Claire in the bathroom. She was blowing her nose and doing some skincare, nodding, “Finn too?”

“Mhm.” Harry grabbed his toothbrush while looking at Claire in the mirror. She was lost in thought and he decided to leave it at that for tonight.

The family of four all fell asleep in the same bed, with Harry and Claire each cuddling up to their sons to provide them the comfort they apparently craved. 

***

Once May rolled in, Claire eventually got the letter. Her heart slammed in her throat when she recognized the letters from court, and she exhaled a slight sigh of relief when it turned out to just be her invitation to go talk to the social worker in regards to the social inquiry.

Claire called immediately to lock in an appointment. The social worker turned out to be a woman named Nancy. She sounded friendly and warm on the phone, immediately soothing Claire’s worries a little bit. Nancy informed her that in that first talk, it was supposed to be just Claire. She felt a bit deflated that she wasn’t allowed to bring Harry - but also understood.

This social inquiry was mostly between her and Evan, surrounding Atlas. They were his biological parents. Harry was a big part of his life, and Nancy assured Claire that she’d eventually also include Harry and talk to him, as she would with Otis and perhaps Finn if he wanted to.

Claire felt relieved that she could go in a few days later, and she gave herself a peptalk in the mirror before driving down to the courthouse to meet with Nancy.

Claire had to admit she was between jobs and had a very free schedule. Ever since being with Harry, she gave up her Burger King-job and did nothing for a while but adapt to their new reality. With the absence of rent and the help of Harry, there were no financial worries for the first time in her life.

Yet Claire grew bored and was on the lookout for something. Maybe something administrative, she wasn’t sure yet. She helped Harry sometimes with his accounting and answered his emails or his calls from time to time. Sometimes she wondered how she did it all those years, being a single parent to Atlas and doing a fulltime job and the household. 

Sometimes her days were simply filled doing laundry, going grocery shopping and cleaning the house. Until Evan called her a gold digger and it stung. And she hoped it wouldn’t be used against her in court.

“Ms. Carter?” A woman smiled at her as Claire sat waiting in one of the chairs. She quickly got up and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before offering her hand, “Yes, I’m Claire.” She breathed.

“Nancy.” The woman nodded, “Nice to meet you. Not too much traffic coming here?” They walked the long hallways together and Claire shook her head, “No, it was okay.”

Nancy smiled, “It’s just through here. You can sit wherever you’d like.”

Claire glanced around the room, which was clearly decorated for conversations with children. It had a small, low table in the corner with kid’s chairs, a ton of toys and stuffed animals and lots of children’s books.

“This is our kid’s space.” Nancy explained, “When we talk to kids, it’s in this room. I booked it for our conversation too because it was the only available room.”

Claire slowly nodded, “I see.” Her lips then curled up into a small smile, “Atlas has this book too.” She pointed to one.

“Really?” Nancy smiled, “It’s usually a big hit.”

“Mhm. He really likes it.” She then shrugged off her coat and took a seat in one of the chairs, fiddling with her fingers.

“Are you nervous?” Nancy checked, a friendly smile on her face. Claire exhaled, “Honestly, yes. A little bit. It’s all quite new and I’m not sure what to expect.”

“That’s understandable.” Nancy nodded, “So I’m a social worker, and I work for the family justice court.” She began, “Sometimes the judge asks us to do a social inquiry in certain cases, when it’s too difficult to make a decision and the judge isn’t sure what’s left or right anymore. That’s where we come in. We take a few steps with both mum and dad, and I’d also like to see Atlas once or twice. We contact the school and such to get a broad view on who Atlas is as a child, mostly in relation to his parents, so that’s you and Evan. And the custody arrangement.”

Claire’s chest clenched a bit and she swallowed before nodding, “So… you decide what happens to Atlas then?”

“I don’t.” Nancy shook her head, “I take these steps and I basically make the puzzle surrounding Atlas. I talk to him and also pull information from literature and investigation, knowing what works best for children his age and what their needs are. Then I write a report to the judge, but the final decision is always with the judge.”

“Right.” Claire slowly nodded.

Nancy shot her a smile, “I’d also like to do a house visit, just to see what Atlas’ environment is. I do these same steps with dad.” She explained.

“Okay.” Claire breathed and Nancy nodded, “So basically what I’ll do with you - and the father - is that we… talk. Mostly about Atlas and how we can get out of the current rut and move forward towards something that best fits him.”

“That’s all I want.” Claire swallowed, nodding, “It’s been so…” She exhaled, “it’s been such a nightmare.” She already felt the lump in her throat and swallowed thickly, “Sorry, I really don’t mean to cry after only a minute.”

“That’s okay.” Nancy encouraged her, “I understand that this is an emotional time. You try to do what’s best for your little boy, I’m sure.”

Claire nodded fiercely, “I-I do. I definitely do.”

“Are you okay with us starting from the beginning? How did you and Evan meet, how long were you together and such?”

And so Claire took a breath and told her story. Not too many details, because Nancy also didn’t ask for those. Just in broad lines how she and Evan met, how they got together, how their relationship went - including all the ups and downs. How Claire got pregnant and told him, and how horrifying that pregnancy was without his support and with her dependance on drugs.

How she eventually got away and how the terrors began. How he hit her, stalked her, threatened her and made her life a living hell for the past seven years.

Claire lit up once Nancy asked her about Atlas. Claire used hand-gestures to describe what kind of child Atlas is and how he’s wild and adventurous, but also so snuggly. She explained how she felt him regress whenever he was around Evan, and how he had nightmares and asked to sleep in her bed.

Nancy nodded along and took notes of everything Claire explained. The conversation turned towards Harry and Finn and their blended family. Claire smiled when she spoke of the bond Harry and Atlas had, and how Nancy would certainly see that if she came to visit them at the house. 

“Have you ever considered taking Atlas to therapy?” Nancy questioned curiously. Claire nibbled her lip and slowly shook her head, “I actually haven’t. I mean… I’m not sure if he’d benefit from it. Isn’t he too young?”

“From what you explained, he sounds like a bright young man.” Nancy smiled, “And it’d be a child therapist, of course. Someone who’s trained to work with children, and maybe even specifically surrounding the topic of divorce and living in two seperate houses. Is he a creative kid?”

“Like drawing and stuff?” Claire questioned, “Not really. He is a good talker though. He’s… inquisitive, I’d say. He asks me a lot and often wants Harry to explain things very in depth.”

Nancy nodded, “Did you tell him what you were doing today?”

“No.” Claire shook her head. When I came back from court last time, I explained to him what was going to happen. He asked a few questions and he knows you will come to the house to talk to him. He’s not too nervous, he says. But… well - that night, he asked to sleep in our bed.”

Nancy’s eyes turned sympathetic and Claire lowered her gaze. Silence fell over the room a little bit and Claire eventually took a breath, “I just don’t understand why he keeps getting chances.” She murmured, “He’s disappointed Atlas so many times. He’s never been there for him, or for us. I did it all by myself. I take full responsibility for the way Atlas is today, because Evan didn’t raise him. I-I just don’t get how many mistakes he has to make, or how bad it has to be for something to finally be done.” She ended while shrugging her shoulders.

“I’ve been in hospital a handful of times because of him, in the year and a half alone. Atlas saw it all. That’s… that’s not okay for a seven year old.”

“It’s not.” Nancy agreed.

After nearly two hours, they wrapped it up. Nancy would be in touch after she also managed to speak to Evan to hear his side of the story. Claire had pressed her lips together to keep herself from talking, because she was about to warn Nancy that all he’d say are lies. But of course, Nancy was supposed to be neutral and she couldn’t pick sides - so Claire just kept her mouth shut.

Going home, she sat thinking in the car. Thinking of Atlas, and thinking of the life choices she made. Losing her family and her parent’s support because she was with Evan. She hated him, and she regretted him every single day of her life.

But then she looked at Atlas, and she wouldn’t change it for the world. She’d take the pain times ten if it meant making him happy and carefree. Claire was always overcome with such a pure love, one that she felt like she could hardly explain. She was glad that Harry understood, because he felt the same towards Finn.

And sometimes, Claire took a little step back to realize how fucking lucky she was.

And she didn’t realize it yet, but life was about to get a little luckier.

***

Harry whistled once he locked the car.

His sunglasses sat low on the bridge of his nose and he just couldn’t wait to get inside and change into something more comfortable. Even if it was May, it was insanely warm. He wore slacks for this business meeting with the headhunters of his latest project, but his slacks were as uncomfortable as they could be.

“Babe?” He called out once he opened up the front door. Harry was met with silence but glanced down, seeing the shoes strewn by the front door with the absence of Claire’s favourite slippers.

She only wore them at home, and it was a sign to him that she was home.

He kept whistling the same tune softly, kicking off his own dress shoes before putting his briefcase down on the dining table. Peaking into the kitchen, his face lit up when he saw Claire at the stove.

Her head flicked to the side, a bright smile immediately appearing on her face, “Hey!” She excitedly smiled, and Harry was drawn to her like a magnet. His hands found her hips as he kissed her, humming. The scent of Claire’s famous pancakes entered his nose and he melted into a puddle of comfort.

He was home.

“How was your meeting?” Claire questioned, hair up in a lazy ponytail and wearing one of Harry’s aprons that said chef Styles at the front, embroidered in elegant gold. Harry dipped his finger in the pancake batter, humming, “Quite good. They like my ideas so far. They did want me to rethink the columns though.”

“No, really?! We sat hours thinking about those god damn columns.” Claire complained and Harry chuckled, licking off his finger, “I know. But hey, they pay my bills so… I’ll fuckin’ rethink their columns.”

Claire chuckled at Harry’s cursing - something he really only did when he was done with someone’s shit or when the kids weren’t home.

Her heart hammered in her chest when she kept her back to him, clearing her throat, “Hey - uh… can you get me a spoon?”

“Spoon.” Harry nodded, pushing himself off the counter, “Sure.”

He whistled again, yet it abruptly stopped when he opened up the cutlery drawer.

He saw no spoons, forks or knives. The drawer had been cleared out and instead Harry saw a little dark green romper in the drawer. And a pregnancy test next to it.

“Wh-” He cut himself off with a sharp gasp, tears blurring his eyes when he felt like his heart stopped. His legs wobbled when he felt the sharp rush to his head. He briskly turned around, and Claire’s smile grew when she saw the shock written all over his face.

She sheepishly leaned against the counter behind her, the stove turned off in a break from making pancakes.

“Surprise.” She whispered with a smile.

Harry panted out, as if he had just ran a marathon, “Y-You’re pregnant?” His voice cracked.

“Yes.” Claire giggled and Harry threw his head back, pumping his fists, “You’re pregnant!” He shouted.

“Harry!” Claire giggled as he ran up to her and scooped her up. Claire’s ponytail flew around as he spun her, hands underneath her thighs and smiling into her neck. Harry then sat her down on the countertop, breathing heavily as his eyes watered and his cheeks hurt from smiling, “Please, tell me I’m not dreaming.”

Claire lovingly cupped his cheeks, “You’re not dreaming, my love.” She smiled, “We’re having a baby.”

“Shit.” Harry’s voice broke as he buried his face into her neck, hugging her tightly to his chest. Claire soothed him, understanding the range of emotions running through Harry. They had been wanting this for quite some time.

She played with the hair in the nape of his neck as Harry tried to come to terms with the new information.

He pulled back with watery eyes and Claire giggled, “You’re crying.” She teased and he huffed out a chuckle, “Shut up.” He grabbed the back of her neck to bring her in for a deep kiss. They smiled into one another as Harry touched Claire in every way he could. 

“I’m so happy.” He whispered, “You make me so happy. You make me so happy.” He repeated the words, kissing around Claire’s face until she shook with giggles and Harry could hardly breathe anymore.

“How long?” He breathed. Claire nibbled her lip, “Just a few weeks. I’m not sure. I took a few tests today, they all came back positive. I-I couldn’t wait to tell you.” She spoke. She realized they still weren’t a billion percent sure. They hadn’t been to the doctor’s and Claire hadn’t gotten any blood work done. But the six tests she peed on all told her the same answer.

A very clear line that indicated she was pregnant. No more than a couple of weeks.

“I love you.” Harry murmured, “So much. You’re giving me my dream.” He cried more and Claire giggled, making slight fun of him as Harry hid in her neck and held her tightly. Claire couldn’t wipe the bright smile off of her face.

She had been throwing up a few times lately. Claire thought it was stress - but much like every month she decided to take a pregnancy test today. She didn’t even expect it to come out positive. But then there it was.

And now they were here. On cloud nine.

“D-Do we tell the boys?” Harry sniffled, wiping underneath his eyes once he unhooked himself from Claire. She couldn’t even respond before he deeply kissed her. Claire leaned back into the wall as Harry slipped his tongue inside of her mouth, shoving every single emotion he felt into the kiss to leave her dizzy and breathless.

“H-” She tried but he groaned, kissing her again, “I want you.” He panted.

Claire raised her brows, “Wh- now?” She asked in shock. Harry nodded eagerly, “Mhm. We’ve got time right?” He already dragged her to the edge of the countertop to pick her up underneath her thighs again.

“Uh - yeah, like an hour - Harry, wait.” Claire giggled when he carried her up the stairs, the apron still on her body. Claire smiled while Harry kicked open the door of their bedroom and then used his foot to close it again.

Even though he couldn’t wait to make her his and celebrate this moment by being so close to her, he was gentle when laying her down. Claire bit her lip to fight her smile as he seemingly tried to take it slow and easy, but the second he was on top of her and they met in a searing kiss - that all flew out the window.

The apron landed on the floor, quickly followed by their other clothes. Claire could hardly keep up with his pace but every thought she ever had left her brain when she felt his tongue between her thighs.

“Oh…” Claire exhaled, melting into the bedding and tipping her head back with a soft gasp when Harry licked into her. His fingers kept her open and he played with her clit like only he could, keeping his eyes closed as he revelled in her taste.

Claire’s eyes rolled back when he sucked on her, “Harry…” She moaned, “oh my god.” Her hand found his curls, pulling him closer into her as she fought to keep her lips still. Harry’s fingers joined, sinking inside her easily and dragging up her front wall until Claire shuddered and orgasmed.

But if she thought that was the end of it, she was deeply mistaken. After four orgasms total, Claire could hardly keep her eyes open. She laid spent on the bedding with Harry slotted in between her legs, dick inside of her.

He had her in every position imaginable, from rolling her on her tummy and pulling her hips up to take her from behind, to assisting her in riding him and then slipping inside her as they spooned - he always preferred to end in missionary.

Harry hunched over her, breathing into her neck and inhaling her scent as Claire’s pussy pulsed around his aching cock, milking him of everything he could offer her. His thighs trembled as they each came down from their orgasm, and Claire felt tingly and exhausted.

“Sweet girl.” Harry crooned in her ear, “I love you so much.”

Claire hummed and tiredly yawned, “Jesus,” she hummed in satisfaction, “I should get pregnant more often.”

Harry bit his lip and sharply thrusted, his half hard dick scooting up inside of Claire to make her whimper. He squeezed their laced-together fingers, “Any complaints?” He teased and she quickly shook her head, “N-Nope. None at all.”

“Thought so.” He chuckled.

“I love you, baby daddy.” Claire lazily smiled and Harry smiled into her neck, “I still can’t believe we’re finally having a baby.” He lifted up a bit to gaze down at her, and Claire had her eyes closed, softly smiling, “Me neither.” She murmured.

“I’ve wanted this for so long.” Harry stroked his thumb over her cheekbone, “The entire thing is just gonna be amazing. Watching you grow a beautiful bump, going to appointments together, being there with you for birth, watch our boys become big brothers.” He listed and Claire forced her eyes open to see Harry with a dreamy look on his face.

“I can’t wait to tell them.” She smiled and Harry chuckled, “They’re going to be over the moon. Should we - uh… wait until we’ve seen a doctor?”

Claire stifled a yawn, “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. I’ll call the doctor in a minute.”

“You take a nap first, babe. I’ll pick up the kids.” He offered, kissing the corner of her mouth.

Claire didn’t protest and let Harry clean her up a bit. She giggled when he ducked underneath the sheets to sponge kisses to her tummy and whisper things to a very tiny baby that she couldn’t understand. Claire felt lighter than she had in a long time.

She took a nap and later came down to her entire world sitting at the dining table. Atlas excitedly told her about his day and Finn climbed up on Claire’s thighs to show her some of his spelling homework. 

It was about a week later that Nancy came around to talk to Atlas. Claire was a bit of a nervous wreck, keeping herself busy in the kitchen as Atlas sat in his bedroom with Nancy. They hadn’t talked about it much, but Claire tried to reassure Atlas that he could say whatever he wanted and that she was a nice woman.

A small hour later, Nancy came back down the stairs and offered Claire a smile, “You have a bright boy, Claire.” She congratulated her and Claire smiled while exhaling a sigh, “Thank you. Did everything go okay?”

“It did.” She nodded, “I took some notes and I asked him if he’s okay with me sharing whatever he said with you. He said it’s fine, so I’ll write it all in my report and go through it with you the next time we see each other.”

Claire nodded, “Okay. And - uh… is there anything I can do for him right now? Was it… emotional? Does he need something?”

Nancy’s mouth curled up into a small smile and she shook her head, “It wasn’t a very emotional talk. He was nice and polite and we played a little game. He showed me his room and his toys - he’s very proud of that giraffe.” She smiled and Claire chuckled, “Yeah, he is.”

“He said it was a gift from daddy Harry.”

Claire’s insides warmed and she sniffled once, nodding, “Mhm. He gave it to him for his birthday last year.”

“That’s sweet.” Nancy then briefly touched Claire’s arm in comfort, “You don’t have to do anything special for him tonight, Ms. Carter. Atlas is very emotionally mature and I’m sure he’ll show signs or tell you when he feels in distress.”

“Okay. Thank you.” Claire exhaled before she let Nancy out.

And in the week that passed, Claire and Harry got the confirmation from the doctor that she was, in fact, pregnant. Just five weeks. But they couldn’t even keep it in. Harry had already called his parents and Claire had tried with all her might to not let anything slip to Atlas and Finn. They hadn’t noticed anything about her this week, but they’d soon notice she skipped out on different foods or she’d get sick more often, or she’d grow a bump.

Harry was by far most excited about that. The baby was a far dream for now, his current dream was seeing Claire with a beautiful bump. 

He touched her stomach all the time even if there was nothing there yet, and he whispered to the baby on most evenings while she was dozing off. It was adorable to see him, and he cried tears of joy more often in the last week than Claire had seen from him in all the time she knew him.

But tonight, they decided they were going to tell the boys.

And Claire felt excited, but also a little nervous. Harry was at another meeting and Claire would pick up Finn this Friday evening. Atlas stayed home due to Nancy coming around.

Claire wore a flowy top and had sunnies on her nose as she waited by the school gate, making the obligatory small talk with Dolores - who mostly asked questions about Harry.

“So, Atlas,” She leaned down to smile brightly at him. He forced a little smile back and Claire fought her giggle as Dolores took a breath, “how come you weren’t in school today? Are you feeling sick?” She raised her hand to place it on his forehead and Atlas backed away, into Claire’s side a little.

It made her heart shatter. Of course she always taught Atlas to not let strangers touch him without him giving consent, but it also went to show that he was scared of a raised hand. She stroked her fingers through his hair and cleared her throat, “No, he wasn’t sick. We just had something to do so we’re just picking up Finn now.”

“Something to do, hm?” Dolores smiled, “Something fun? If it makes you skip out on school?”

Claire rolled her eyes and then heard the bell ringing. Atlas jumped up to greet Finn by the gate and Claire smoothed her hands over her top, “Look, Dolores, please stop putting your nose all up in my business. If I don’t give details, it’s because it’s private.” She sternly spoke.

Dolores’ lips turned into a tight line and she shot Claire a fake smile, “Noted. Have a good weekend.”

“You too.” Claire sighed before her face lit up, “Finn!” She squeaked, the boy eagerly running up to her for a hug, “Hi, Claire bear.” He mumbled and she couldn’t even find it in herself to scold him for it today.

She took his backpack to put in the back of the car, “Are you excited for the weekend?” Claire asked as both boys got in the backseat.

“Yes!” They simultaneously shouted out, making Claire smile. She looked at Finn and Atlas playfully giggling through the rear-view mirror.

“How did it go today?” Finn questioned softly. One glance in the mirror told Claire that his question was directed towards Atlas. She nodded to herself, liking how Finn was there for emotional support for Atlas. They trusted each other through and through and proudly named one another their brother. And besides that, they were best friends.

Atlas shrugged, “It was okay. The lady was nice. She had funny glasses.”

“Really?” Finn smiled and Atlas eagerly nodded, “Mhm. They went like this.” He used his fingers to motion for a cat-eye shaped pair of glasses and Claire chuckled under her breath as Finn gasped in surprise, “Wow! Is she coming back? I wanna see!”

Atlas looked at Claire and she pressed her lips together, “I’m not sure. I don’t think so, honestly. She said you did so good. It might be enough to see you just the one time.”

Atlas proudly beamed at himself and Finn patted his hand, “Hear that? She said you did good!”

“I just answered her questions.” Atlas downplayed. Finn shifted a little, “What kind of questions?”

“About mummy and daddy. And you too. And daddy Harry.” Atlas spoke. Finn nodded as he listened intently. There was a lot of hurt in the car. Some people might find it admirable that Evan at least tried to fight for Atlas. For Finn, it was just Harry. Astrid didn’t even try to see him or know him.

Claire would never understand that choice, but on the other hand it did lead her to her Harry and a lifetime of happiness. Claire slipped her hand to the backseat to squeeze Finn’s calf playfully, “Hey, you know what we’re having for dinner tonight? It was your week to pick.”

Finn gasped excitedly, “Did daddy make enchiladas?!”

He mispronounced the word completely, making Claire crack up but she nodded, “Mhm, he made enchiladas.”

“Yay!” Finn squealed as Claire pulled up on the driveway, her smile growing when she saw Harry’s car parked there too.

“Hi, my three loves.” Harry greeted them playfully with open arms, catching one boy in each as they laughed and wrestled for a bit. He held Finn back just a tad when Claire approached, “Not too rough around mum, Finn.” He warned softly. Finn didn’t think much of it and Harry slipped an arm around Claire’s form, his other hand resting low on her tummy. 

Pulling her in for a long kiss, he contently hummed against her lips, “How was today?” He whispered.

“Good.” Claire smiled, “Atlas did good. Nancy is going to give us the full report at the end but she said he was so polite and sweet. So… yeah. And Atlas seems fine so far.” She shrugged, “He hasn’t said anything. Spoke about it to Finn a bit in the car.”

“That’s great.” Harry nodded, “And you? Not too rough this morning?”

“Just some sickness.” Claire shrugged, “But I didn’t throw up.”

Harry helped her put down her bag, “Did you get sick a lot when pregnant with Atlas?”

Claire swallowed thickly as she avoided his gaze, “To be honest, I - uh… I can’t really remember.”

Harry caught on and softly squeezed her hip, “‘S okay. Did you still want to tell them tonight?”

She bit her lip with a smile, “Yeah, I think so. Hey, how was the meeting?”

“Good! I pitched the idea for the new columns and they’re on board.” He shrugged, “So just need to order in the materials now.”

Claire patted his ass, “Good job, daddy.”

He huffed out, shaking his head in disbelief, “Brat.”

“What?” Claire innocently shrugged while taking a glass from the cupboard, “Just calling you by your rightful name.”

He walked up to her with a small smirk, grabbing her throat but not alarming Claire in the slightest. Harry affectionatelly rubbed his nose with hers, “I’m gonna get you back tonight, you know that, right?”

“Counting on it.” She whispered back, pecking his lips in a chaste kiss.

Harry felt a blush on his cheeks when he watched the way she walked away from him, sultrily swaying her hips. He felt so in love he didn’t even know what do with himself. No day with Claire was ever dull.

It was after dinner, when everyone was heading to the couch for a movie, that Claire nervously fiddled her fingers. Finn and Atlas sat waiting with big round eyes, “What’s the surprise?” Atlas frowned in confusion.

“We got something for the both of you.” Harry came walking up with two little bags. Claire forced a smile, knowing it was the corniest gift ever and she had absolutely no say in it. But Harry had a vision in telling the boys, and this was it.

Finn frowned too, “Is it someone’s birthday?”

“It’s not.” Harry chuckled, handing both boys a gift bag but holding up his finger, “It’s very important that you open it together and that you very carefully read what’s on it before asking any questions, okay?”

The boys eagerly nodded yet Finn pouted, “Read?” He repeated, “More reading? I thought school was done.”

Claire sputtered out a laugh at his sarcasm and even Harry found himself amused, knowing that was 100% Claire’s influence rubbing off on him. He shot Finn a look, “Just open it, bub.”

Atlas’ tongue poked out in concentration as he tried to open the ribbon and Harry and Claire shared a look before he took her hand in his and gave a squeeze. 

“Slow down, Finn.” Harry softly chuckled, alerting him to wait for Atlas a bit. Eventually both boys got to opening up the bag and Claire held her breath, keeping her eyes on Atlas solemnly as he frowned in confusion, pulling out the shirt in his size and he held it open.

“World’s…” Finn struggled a bit to read the words and Harry clenched his jaw, his surprise not really going how he wanted.

“... best big brother.” Atlas finished, tilting his head to the side. Claire felt tears in her eyes this time as Atlas slowly lowered the shirt with a frown of confusion on his face. He blinked at Claire once before dropping his eyes to her stomach, and Claire’s pulse skyrocketed.

Harry cleared his throat softly, “You’re going to be big brothers. Mum and dad are… uh - having a baby.” He spoke almost nervously.

Finn’s brows raised as his jaw dropped, “A new little bub?” He gasped.

“A new little bub.” Harry chuckled in a nod.

“Baby?” Claire checked, waiting for Atlas’ reaction. He still seemed dumbfounded before he flicked his eyes between Harry and Claire, “We’re getting a little brother?”

“O-Or a sister.” Claire stuttered. Atlas immediately pouted at that, making Harry throw his head back in a laugh.

“Or a brother.” Claire quickly smiled.

Atlas got up his feet and ran up to her. Claire let go of Harry’s hand to catch Atlas, wrapping her arms around his body as he pressed his face to her neck, “Mummy, I’m so happy.” He murmured.

“Oh, thank god.” Claire sighed out, and Harry rubbed his hand over Atlas’ back with a smile. 

“How long do we have to wait?!” Finn squealed, joining in on the group hug. Claire sniffled as Harry laughed, “About eight months, buddy. So… around February of next year.”

“That’s long.” Atlas pulled back with a pout, “I’ll be eight by then.”

“You will be.” Claire cupped his cheek lovingly, “You’ll both be.”

Atlas went on to hug Harry as FInn cuddled into Claire, “I love you, mum.” He whispered and Claire cried some more, kissing his cheek repeatedly, “I love you too, angel boy.”

“Now you’re the one crying.” Harry teased as he squeezed the back of Claire’s neck. She breathed out a huffing chuckle, “I’m pregnant, I’m allowed.”

“Yeah, you are.” He smiled.

***

“And then Atlas said that he gets along really well with Finn.” Nancy smiled.

Harry’s hand was on Claire’s thigh and she toyed with his fingers as they sat in Nancy’s office together. Today was their second appointment with Nancy, and basically their last. The next time they saw one another would be right before court, when she would hand out the final reports before their hearing.

Harry smiled at the words, “They do get along really well.”

“Mhm.” Claire agreed, “It’s sweet to see.”

“Atlas said so. He said Finn is his best friend.” She put the papers down, “Overall, Ms. Carter and Mr. Styles, I got to know Atlas as a very respectful and wise young man.”

Claire’s heart warmed and Nancy continued, “It was clear to me that he was genuine and honest, and his truth is that he doesn’t necessarily want any contact with his biological father. He doesn’t miss him when he’s not there and he doesn’t feel too comfortable in the house either.” Nancy then turned around a few of the papers, “I asked Atlas to draw. Both his houses.”

Claire leaned forward as Harry squinted a bit, seeing the stick figures and houses drawn. Nancy pointed to one, “This is where he drew your house. He drew this one first. He went for oranges and yellow-tones for the house itself and drew you both with precision, including color of your hair.”

Claire stared at the drawn version of herself and Nancy tapped her finger on Claire’s stick figure, “He drew you with flowers on your dress.”

“He loves that dress.” Claire smiled softly and Harry squeezed her leg.

“He drew a lot of flowers and hearts around the house itself too. And he drew clouds in his room.” Nancy ran her finger in a circle over where Atlas drew his room, “I asked him why, and he said it means dreams and comfort.”

Claire’s lip wobbled as she forced a smile. Her sweet boy.

Nancy softly cleared her throat, “Then I asked him to draw his father’s house.” Nancy grabbed another paper, and Claire and Harry’s faces immediately fell.

“He used only… grey for this one. No decorations,” Nancy explained, “no colours, no flowers, no… clouds.” She showed the house Atlas drew, “It was also noticeable how in your house, he drew himself as part of the family. When drawing his father’s house, he drew just his father. And he’s not smiling either.”

Claire and Harry didn’t respond much, just stared at the drawings. Nancy put the papers back and clasped her fingers together, “Me and Atlas played a little game after. With cards that have questions on them. I asked him what he likes about mum’s house, and he said he likes it because you’re there. He feels safe and warm, and he said daddy Harry is a very good cook.”

Harry’s lips curled into a grin and he chuckled, almost blushing. Nancy smiled along, “I asked him the same about his father, and he… he didn’t have much to say. He said it’s quite bland. They don’t do much besides watch TV. And he misses swim practice every other week, and he likes to swim.”

“In short,” Nancy breathed, “Atlas doesn’t seem to have much connection to his dad. You’ll read it in the final report, but I of course had all these conversations with the father as well. Just like I asked you, I asked him to describe his son. He… he didn’t say much.” Nancy shrugged.

Claire huffed. It didn’t necessarily surprise her that Evan couldn’t describe Atlas. He wasn’t an attentive person in general and he didn’t know much about Atlas. He didn’t ask things either. Nancy cleared her throat, “For example, he couldn’t tell me Atlas’ favorite color, or his favorite subject in school, or his favorite toy or game.”

“So… I mean, these things are telling, right? Atlas is too young to be heard by the judge, but he literally told you he doesn’t want to see Evan anymore. That means something, right?” Harry questioned.

Nancy nodded, “It does. Of course… a family judge will always try to include both biological parents in the life of a child. Especially a child that can’t make that decision for himself. Atlas is young. Chances are that the judge will give Evan another chance.”

Claire frowned, “Another chance? He’s gotten billions of chances.”

“I’m also allowed to state my advice to the judge. It’s not binding, in the sense that I can’t make the decision but I can steer in a certain direction,” Nancy explained, “and I will definitely advise for an ending of contact between Atlas and Evan.”

Harry and Claire exhaled a sigh of relief and nodded to themselves, “Thank you.” Claire spoke.

And low and behold, a few weeks later, Claire and Harry went back to court to face Evan and hear the judge. Claire was a nervous wreck, and Harry constantly stroked his hand over her tummy. She was now almost three months pregnant and when wearing something extremely tight, the tiniest of bumps showed.

Claire was sure Harry imagined the bump and she had just been slacking with working out since the pregnancy, but Harry was convinced it was there. And he loved on her tiny bump like nothing else.

Today, it was concealed. 

Claire wore a sundress as July approached. Harry’s mum was at the house to look after the boys for today, and tomorrow they were heading to camp for a week so Harry and Claire had some time to themselves as well.

To either cry about what was said today, or to celebrate it.

Timothy stood behind them, explaining to the judge what he had read in the social inquiry. Evan looked pissed as fuck because Nancy actually did advise for the contact between him and Atlas to be broken for the time being. Nancy didn’t advise this forever, and the judge repeated how a custody arrangement was something dynamic. Atlas would age and his needs would change, but Claire could only hope that from now on, they’d always respect his decisions and his wishes.

Timothy repeated Nancy’s words, saying that Atlas clearly didn’t have a connection with Evan and that he didn’t ask for it. Evan’s judge argued that Atlas was young and maybe didn’t exactly know what he wanted.

The judge cleared her throat and Harry and Claire held their breaths as she spoke out that Atlas and Evan were not to have contact. Almost a restraining order, so to say. It’d be under evaluation for at least six months, after which there’d probably be a new social inquiry to see how things were.

Evan’s lawyer did get the judge to agree that someone other than Nancy was to conduct the next social inquiry. Claire rolled her eyes at that.

She refused to look at Evan, not even when she felt his gaze burning on the side of her face. When he could clearly see the way Harry gently cradled Claire’s barely there bump. He couldn’t keep his hands off, especially when needing comfort or when wanting to comfort Claire.

“Oh, thank god.” Claire sighed as she turned to Harry, immediately wrapping her arms around him when the decision was final. Atlas was theirs, and he’d never have to go see his dad again unless he wanted to. 

Harry exhaled in relief as he kissed the side of Claire’s neck, “You did it.” He whispered, “‘M so proud of you.”

“We did it.” Claire corrected him, pulling back to cup his cheek and plant a kiss to his lips. She felt like a huge weight was lifted off her shoulders. And Harry’s too.

His eyes looked light and energized when he smiled at her, love radiating from him, “Let’s go home to our boys.” He squeezed her fingers as the pair left the courtroom.

That night, the family of four celebrated. Harry’s mum stayed over too, occupying herself with the kids a little while Claire assisted Harry in the kitchen for dinner. She cupped her hand underneath the dripping spoon he let her get a taste off and she hummed, nodding before she licked her lip, “It’s so good, H.”

“Yeah? Does it need anything more?” Harry checked and Claire shook her head, hopping on the countertop, “No, it’s perfect. I don’t understand how you do that.”

Harry chuckled, “What? Make tomato-sauce? It’s so easy.”

“Well, if it’s so easy, I’d be able to do it.” Claire muttered under her breath. Harry walked over to her, splitting her knees as he stood in between them, “Hey,” he chuckled with a slightly teasing tone, “we balance each other out, hm? I’m good at the cooking, you’re good at other stuff.”

She cocked up an eyebrow, “Like what?”

Harry opened his lips and Claire shot him a challenging look, “I swear, if you say cleaning…” She held up a warning finger and Harry laughed before pretending to bite it. He leaned in to press a deep kiss to her lips, “No, m’love. Other things.” His hands slipped up her dress to feel her bare thighs, “So good at so many other things.” He whispered against her lips before Claire wrapped her arms around his shoulders and they were pulled into a deep make-out session.

Tongues tangled together as the food sputtered on the stove. Harry softly groaned as he nipped below her ear, “Can’t wait to fuck you in this kitchen every day next week.”

She breathed out a chuckle, running her fingers through his hair, “Trust me, me neither.” They both loved their boys so incredibly much, but a week with just the two of them sounded incredible. No responsibilities.

“Won’t be able to bend you over though.” Harry murmured, hand slipping to the bulging in her tummy as he gently stroked his fingers over her skin. Claire puffed out a breath, “We’ll do it on the bed then.” She panted, “You can bend me over all you want.”

He chuckled, “Dirty.” His hips rutted forward as they teased each other in the kitchen. The tip of his tongue flicked her bottom lip and Claire fought her shudder as Harry had her in the palm of his hand. 

They were in the exact same position just twenty-four hours later. Only now it was just the two of them in the house. And now, Claire’s dress was pulled up over her hips and the straps of her shoulders were tugged down to expose her tits. Harry panted into her mouth as he thrusted inside of her, filling her deep with each thrust.

“Fuck - y’feel so good.” Harry moaned, lifting her thigh a little higher around his hip to get the deeper angle. Claire’s head thudded back into the cabinet, her lips open in laboured breaths while Harry stared at the bounce in her tits from the rhythm he had set.

After sex in the kitchen, they were in a teasing and playful mood. Harry chased Claire through the house for a bit until they ate more of Harry’s heavenly cooking with a candle dancing between them.

“C’mon, let’s go for a walk.” Harry offered Claire his hand and she sighed out, fixing her hair in the clip a little after cleaning up their dishes, “Really? Can’t we just… watch a movie?”

Harry pouted, “Babe, c’mon… it’s such a beautiful night. It’s nice and warm, and the fresh air will do us good before going to sleep.”

Claire was easily persuaded when Harry pouted at her like that, so she put on her slippers and they exited the house for a walk in the summer evening. The sun was down but the crickets were loud and the temperatures were still warm.

Their fingers were laced together as Harry guided them in the direction of a little nearby park. Claire was in the middle of telling an elaborate story about Dolores when she stopped on her tracks, blinking at the sight in front of her.

The one big tree that stood central in the little park, was lit up with lampions. It exuded warmth and Harry gently tugged Claire’s hand, “Come on.” He murmured, pulling her in the direction of the tree. 

“H-Harry.” She stuttered, not finding any other words to say as she stumbled behind him a little. His face lit up from the lights as he smiled at her, coming to a stop underneath the tree. The shock on Claire’s face was slightly amusing as she blinked at him, “Did you do this?” She whispered.

“Mhm.” Harry smiled softly before cupping her chin and bringing her in for a kiss, “I wanted it to be perfect.”

“Oh my god.” Claire’s heart slammed in her chest and Harry chuckled at the tone of realization in her voice. He nodded softly and held her hands, “Mhm. You always tell me Atlas can’t keep a secret, hm?”

Claire mindlessly nodded and Harry licked his lip, “Well, he kept this secret real good. Even from Finn. He didn’t tell Finn or you that him and I went on a long walk a few weeks back and that we had a really good conversation. He asked me if I loved you and I said yes. He asked me if I’d love you forever, and I said yes. And then I asked him permission to ask you to marry me.”

“Oh my god.” Claire repeated, her voice sounding watery as tears filled her eyes but she broke out into a wide smile. Harry mirrored it and cleared his throat softly, “So here I am. Almost two years after I first thought I’d like to marry you.” He near mumbled the last part, almost saying it more to himself.

“So, my sweet Claire bear.” He teased with a smile while squeezing her fingers before taking a breath, “You came into my life like a fucking hurricane, but I’ve never felt this free or happy. A-And I can’t believe we’re having a baby together. Being with you feels so freeing, like I’ve known you all my life. And it’s so easy between us too. And then I see you with our boys and everything just clicks. You’re truly the love of my life and there’s no one I’d rather share all my days with.” He spoke.

Claire giggled as she giddily leaned in to kiss him. Harry smiled against her lips, “Will you marry me?” He whispered against her lips.

“Yes!” Claire squeaked, jumping in his arms. Harry caught her easily as they laughed and cuddled and he spun her around. Claire kissed the side of his neck and then his lips, smiling through the kissing, “I love you.” She smiled, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“Love you more.” Harry chuckled, patting her ass, “Don’t you wanna see the ring?”

“Oh, right!” Claire laughed, “I almost forgot.”

“Atlas helped me pick it out.” Harry grabbed a small velvet box from his pocket and Claire held her breath when he opened it up, revealing the minimalistic yet elegant ring, with a small diamond. It wasn’t too in your face, but it was there, and it was perfect.

Claire pressed her palm to her chest, “Oh, Harry…” She murmured, “It’s so beautiful, oh my god.”

“D’you like it?” He checked, slightly nervous. Claire couldn’t tear her eyes away from the ring as she nodded, “I love it. Truly. Wow.”

“You make me so happy.” Harry smiled as he wrapped her up again after sliding the ring on her finger. They breathily kissed while mumbling out love affirmations until Claire started waddling them back to the house.

Harry laughed at her eagerness as he gladly allowed Claire to guide him back home for a night of celebrations.

//

thank you so much for reading along!!! i adore this one :D :D :D

p.s. you asked to be tagged hehe: @theekyliepage

[whalesforhands]

it exists only here

geto suguru holds onto your ghost in the trivial silence of the night.

HBD GETO SUGURU

“Geto-sama, you have an audience with an Amano Kiriko and her father in approximately 30 minutes.”

The cult leader doesn’t say a word, the stalk of pink carnation getting nicked a little too close to its petals for his comfort, his pruning shears threatening the beauty of the flora in his hand.

He thought he had it this time.

Now it’s too short. The osmanthus flowers he had spent so much time intricately placing together will go to waste… Dumb rocks and leaves that took way too long to work in harmony with each other. He sighs, frustration coursing through his tensed arms whilst staring down at the already ruined flower despite the beauty it still retained. It just didn’t fit in well with the image he had in mind. So beautiful, yet so useless now.

Should he just redo it? Amethyst orbs follow the stalk up to where it’s now currently being held up to the hanging lamp light, whiffs of its sweet scent reaching his nose as he glares. He ponders and ponders, his eyes closing to savour the fragrance.

So sweet.

“Tell Amaya-san we’re postponing. I’m busy.” Can’t you see how preoccupied he is with this? It obviously takes precedence over some worthless monkey.

A little more suffering won’t do them any harm.

The silence drags, yet Manami Suda does not break the tense stillness any further, does not even correct her superior on his mispronunciation. What use is there for him to remember a mere monkey’s name?

“Understood, Geto-sama. I will move your meeting back by 40 minutes.” She bows low, her gaze kept towards the ground before she turns on her heel and makes her way out, shiny hair bouncing with every step as she makes it a point to close the door behind her as gently, as silently possible.

It seems that her handsome boss is having one of those days again.

A quiet creak of his door and heel clicks that disappear with distance until they were no more.

It’s now that he realizes he’s alone again, silently staring down at the blush pink of the petals in his hand. He twirls the stalk over and over between his fingers as the silence stretches and stretches. It overwhelms him, his thoughts just a little too loud in the blaring quietude.

“Suguru, you don’t look well.” A warm hand against his forehead, your worried gaze and a soft voice. Touch shifting away and making him nearly chase after your comfort.

(Just for a little longer.)

“Have you been eating properly?” You’re sad, lips downturned into a frown that makes him regret ever looking so gaunt— So weak. He wants to placate you, wants to assure you.

“I’m fine—“

“Nope!” An interruption of an all too boisterous voice, lanky arms immediately hooking around both of you as you’re both pulled towards an all too excited Satoru. “So what say we go out and treat him some good ol’ soba?”

His head is starting to hurt again. A grit of his teeth and shears clattering onto the wooden table, frustrated sigh and slumping of his shoulders to ease this tension within his body. He doesn’t want to think, doesn’t want to feel so… Bad.

It’s only then that his hands reach for the book that was upon the chabudai he sat at, trembling fingers finally making contact with the old paper, the slightly frayed pages easing the stress in his mind, the roar in his ears.

His fingers would trace well-worn, yellowed pages of an all too old shoujo manga, familiar pages that had a noticeable dent in them from how beloved they were by the previous owner. It takes him back, makes his hands reach into traces of the past. Away from this headache inducing present, away from his pain.

“There you are. I bought those famous Kiyoken shumai—“ He freezes in his tracks, his eyes widening and eyebrows raising in shock and worry when he chanced upon your teary gaze, your expression akin to a deer caught in headlights as you look at him with shiny, gemlike eyes and tears that had already spilled, rolling down your embarrassed cheeks.

He takes only a moment to recover, only silently walking forward to plop the plastic bag onto the dining table, giving you a quick once-over before patting your head, as you squeak in stunned surprise, his hand combing down your hair gently before he turns on his heel, steps heavy, quick and a threatening smile upon his face. He starts cracking his knuckles for good measure, his aura flaring into one of intimidation as he gets ready to beat a certain someone up.

“I’ll kill him.”

“S-Suguru— Wait! It’s not Satoru’s fault!” You’re already up on your feet, running to intercept him and grabbing onto his arm, using all your strength to hold him back as you feel your socked feet start to drag across the floor, his strength uninhibited by your attempt.

An innocent, accusatory lilt of his voice as he stops, turning to face you. “Oh? I don’t feel very merciful today—“

“I was crying because of a manga!” Blurted out with a shameful, humiliated voice, your arms hugging his one to your chest even tighter. Your eyes are squeezed shut as your face burns and burns with growing mortification that makes you want to curl up and die and possibility cry even more.

And that calms him down in an instant.

That memory still makes him chuckle, a hand under his chin as his eyes blink at the imagery formed in his head. Mindless flipping of the pages causes him to land on a scene that’s been bookmarked far too many times. He knows this line by heart.

“Till the stars fall down and empty from the sky—“ You sniffle, cutting yourself off and letting Suguru dab the tears treading down your cheeks as you don’t even try to resist, or even pull away from his thoroughly amused self.

“I-It’s just so romantic, okay…?!”

“Hmm?” His smile only seems to grow wider as he leans forth, handkerchief is abandoned in favour of using his thumb, gently tapping at the tears forming again in the corner of your eyes to tease you. “I wouldn’t really know if you don’t finish, will I?”

“B-but I’ll just cry—“ You quickly press his abandoned handkerchief to your nose, a sorry attempt at trying to drag your expressions away to quell the burning shame of having to face him. “Way more, Suguru…!”

“Cry all you want then.” His hand goes to hold your cheek, settling your face in his hand and chuckling as he pats your head, smiling softly, gently, warmly at the way you’re starting to bawl even harder somehow. “I’ll be here to wipe your tears away for you.”

A lock of his hair flitters in front of him, breaking him out of his nostalgic trance as a breeze blows in, as if caressing the strands with tender curiosity. A hand reaches up to thoughtlessly twirl it, amaranth eyes finally opening to bring himself back to reality.

Should he cut his hair soon?

“Suguru, you cut it?!” Satoru holds the boy’s face in his hands, shaking him back and forth and whining his disappointment. “Whyyyyyy?! How could you do that to our beautiful hair?!”

“Our…? Satoru, last I checked it was attached to my scal—“

“No…”

You’re devastated as you sat behind him, fingers slotted inbetween smooth strands that have now been slashed into shortened locks, trampling on your dreamy imagery of his gorgeous hair, your arms hugging around his waist from behind as your face buries into his shoulder to weep for the loss of his beauty.

“Our pretty hair…”

“…aren’t you both being a little overdramatic?”

He feels his heart shake, an ache that yearned to be eased when he opens his eyes to realize that he’s all alone. No matter how far those memories seemed to be, whenever he closed his eyes… It always seemed to be filled with an image of those precious days.

Steadying himself with a sigh and getting up onto his socked feet, he stretches his arms and lets his joints pop.

He should stop thinking about these things.

——

It’s fun.

Geto Suguru is having fun. A stutter in his chest, a fleeting feel in his heart as he exchanged blows. Different from those other students, so similar to that certain someone. Dodging, parrying, summoning, running, bleeding.

So fast. So purposeful in every hit, so unnatural, so talented.

Okkotsu Yuuta was the perfect sorcerer. A curse technique with so much potential, an aura of budding, endless possibilities. Why, oh, why does he still stand with the lesser beings, the lesser race?

His wooden clogs skid across concrete as he stands his ground, a smirk of condemnation and displeasure evident as he spits out a mouthful of blood and metallic ire.

He’ll show him. Show this boy the disparity of their power, the difference in their leagues of playing field as he wipes the remnants of crimson off his mouth, the stinging bruise upon his cheek from where he was bunched pulsating with an urge to destroy. To conquer.

“Cursed Spirit Manipulation: Supreme Art,” A taunting point of his finger upwards, crazed grin upon his face. Bear witness to his overwhelming strength, to his irrepressible supremacy. He doesn’t need anything else when he’s drunk off of power. “Uzumaki.”

Swirling black and daunting shadows form at his fingertip, echos of screams and damned cries of the beasts he’s consumed billowing within.

“Okkotsu,” His face is in a state of a proud, manic insanity, shivers of lustful victory trembling his bones. “I’m glad I could kill you before you managed to fully wield Orimoto Rika.”

This is it. Geto Suguru’s victory, the beginning of the end for this Jujutsu Society. Once this boy dies, he will absorb the Queen of Curses, he will be strong enough to finally change this wretched world for the better.

Would he be satisfied then? Would he finally feel that he’s avenged—

Okkotsu Yuuta doesn’t say a word, a shining determination in his gaze as his back is turned to his enemy, a tentative hand upon the curse that followed him as he called her name. The name of the girl he had known, had loved all this time.

“Rika.” A small whisper into the cursed being’s supposed ear. “I’ll give you everything,” A breath is taken. “My body, my heart, my soul…”

Geto Suguru wants to feel disgusted at the sight.

“I love you, Rika.”

The light hits the silver of the young boy’s ring, metal glinting and catching the attention of the cult leader who was kind enough to let that poor kid say his final words.

“Thank you for always protecting me.” It’s odd, repulsive, Suguru thinks as his ears catch wind of those sugary sweet lines. How warm those words feel, how they’re said with such a bittersweet mirth, how it’s almost like it resembles your—

“Suguru.” Your voice is quiet, your presence a fading comfort as he barely feels it within this empty room.

He feels a phantom warmth, a non-existent touch lightly caressing his cold, gaunt face. A contact that he doesn’t want to let up as his hands reach up only to feel nothingness and an unbearable lurch of his throat.

An aftertaste weighs heavy on his tongue, like a rag that had been used to wipe up vomit. Ringing in his ears as his nose feels clogged, nigh unbreathable. Does it even matter if he doesn’t reply? Will it matter if he tries to will away that distorted voice of yours?

Geto Suguru sees red, sees looming metal doors, hears the thundering jeers of a cult, hears a scream of your name, feels the building terror and anguish of his heart in full.

Feels like he doesn’t know why you’re here now.

Think, Suguru. Why are you of all people appearing right in this crucial moment? What do you want? What are you trying to do? What are you trying to say?

If you had one thing to say to him right now, what would it be?

“Thank you for falling in love with me.”

A sharp intake of air to snap himself out of it, the odd chorus of Yuuta’s voice and yours mixing and mashing up in his head, his pupils dilating and finally focusing back into the battle at hand. It isn’t like him to lose his focus like this. Isn’t like him to get so distracted by a haunting thought.

“Aren’t you quite the player, Okkotsu Yuuta?” His words end on an annoyed growl, a building temper to supplement the forgotten rage in his heart.

But this is what he wants, isn’t it?

“That’s rude.” Okkotsu Yuuta is deadpan, his face set in a tone of utmost sincerity and seriousness.

“This is true love.”

And Geto Suguru wonders if that’s what went wrong as he gets swallowed by an explosion of pink and white.

——

Geto Suguru thought he would at least go out with more grace. A little more flair, in a burst of Hollow Purple or a deep Red.

But not like this.

Not with his back against an alleyway wall, slid down to the ground in pathetic defeat, not whilst he’s missing an arm, bleeding out and searingly painful.

Not while Gojo Satoru stares him down like that in his final moments.

“You’re late,” He just can’t help the smile on his face that forms as his voice traces those beloved words after far too long. “Satoru.”

An exchange of words, their conversation that took place. From the safety of Suguru’s newfound family, to the battle with Satoru’s students… Suguru realizes that what was once his cold, hardened heart was starting to stir with nostalgia, a flutter in his chest that makes him want to get lost in this conversation for just a bit longer; even if the expression on Satoru’s face was blank, empty.

Even if he never smiled at him anymore.

So he takes his time, drawing out each word and sentence and mindless thought that had been churned into a flitter in his stomach that makes him think that it isn’t so bad to be on the losing end.

That it isn’t so bad that this is his end.

And when all was said and done, it goes silent. Comfortingly so in this bitter atmosphere that makes him forget about the stale iron in his mouth and his defeated heart that had nothing left to hide.

It’s hard to say that Geto Suguru was satisfied just yet.

“Do you… Still think I’m a good person?” It’s sudden, a taboo scab nobody, not even Geto himself had wanted to pick at. A wound that never quite gelled over. But— It’s fine because it’s here. It’s fine because it’s right now. Because these trivial, meaningless conversations are what make him feel whole, make him find meaning amongst all his doubt.

“Yeah.” A pause as the honoured one takes in a breath, the squeezing of his palms into tight fists as his glowing eyes begin to soften to shimmery radiance. “I bet she would still think so too.”

That’s not true. Geto Suguru feels, knows it just cannot be, no matter how much his broken heart yearns to believe it. It’s for that reason that he finally lets out a laugh, eyes turning into crescents to match his satisfied smile.

“I killed tons of innocent people, you know?”

There’s no way you would ever look at him the same way.

“You can go and ask her personally, then.” Gojo Satoru sounds so steady, so confident and brazen with his threat; that it sounds like a consolation to Geto Suguru, that it leaves him in utter disbelief at the man’s faith in him, his belief that a damned person like him would ever get to reunite with the likes of you.

Though, it brings him peace in this moment.

“Maybe I will.” It’s his final reassurance, stemming from a hope that he gets to be together with you once more, a last solace for his painful, aching soul in the silence that follows after.

“It’s disappointing, Satoru.”

His eyes blink as he leans his head back against the grimy wall, letting out a breath to soothe the staggering gnawing at his conscience. “That I couldn’t wear a heartfelt smile in this world anymore.”

Not when it turned out like this.

A beat passes, and yet another as Suguru finally feels his body beginning to crumble, vision starting to blur as he starts to see brightness in his dimming eyes. It’s okay. It’s okay now because—

It’s over.

He sees his beloved squat down, coming down onto this pitiful level to meet eyes with him. What is he—

Sincere blue to fading purple, parting lips that start mouthing words that he didn’t think he deserved to hear. He knows that goodbyes are bitter, that he’ll never be ready enough to hear them.

That he’ll never be able to accept that you’re gone.

Yet, even as it reaches into his ears, he didn’t expect the weight, the pressure that makes the tiniest semblance of regret swirl in his heart, slowly realized into a wish that he could rewind time to hear Satoru’s voice that teeters upon a breaking sorrow once more. Just one more time.

“We’ll meet again, right?”

Geto Suguru can only laugh, letting amusement enshroud his expression as his neck cranes towards the light in which his one and only Gojo Satoru shrouded. It’s so stupid, so in character for someone like him.

“At least curse me a little at the end.”

This is how he wants to go. There’s nothing else he wants to long for now… Not the Queen of Curses, not the utter desire to destroy non-sorcerers, not the bloodthirsty revenge and grudge he held against the Jujutsu system— He just wants to feel at peace from the hands of his other half.

This is it.

“Take care of her until I get there.” Wherever you both end up, his final message and blessing from just Satoru to just Suguru. A responsibility given to him that Gojo hopes comes true. All because he hopes it’s peaceful where you both were, that it relieves you both of the hope that made you hurt more.

Suguru’s parting smile is bittersweet, a blush upon his face as enchanting purple finally hide away, finally put to rest with the last of his cursed energy dissipating. A ‘goodbye’ is something he’s no good at, a ‘see you later’ far too unfulfilling. He wishes he could find kinder words as he lets his heart speak his truth, breathed out in a whisper so tender.

“Don’t be late again, Satoru.”

previous next

Notes:

Pink carnations: I’ll never forget you.

Osmanthus flowers: True love.

‘Till the stars fall down and empty from the sky, if you’re with me then everything’s alright.’ - Everything’s Alright from To the Moon (nvy’s favourite game)

[blueariel3-blog]

Only Her

Pairing: Tom Riddle x Reader

A/N: Hello! This is the first fic I'm posting so let me know if you like it! I had so much fun writing it and I always have ideas in my head for stories, so I thought it was time I finally posted one lol.

The autumn breeze was chilling to the bone once you had been exposed to it. No amount of thick sweaters, fluffy scarves, or wool gloves could keep the bite out once the cold really settled in. Tom blew a warm breath into his hands ( as warm as he could manage in the current weather) and cursed the skies. He would not be trekking through this treacherous weather if it weren’t for the bubbly girl skipping in front of him. 

She had asked him to accompany her to Hogsmeade this weekend and no matter how hard he tried to find the cold, unappealing mask he had perfectly molded, he knew there was no way he could turn her down. She was his opposite in every aspect and as much as it didn’t make sense, it also did. 

He tried to keep his usual schemes far away from her innocent ears, though she was not oblivious to his extracurricular activities. He supposed one of the things he enjoyed most is that she never judged him or tried to talk him out of his plans. She simply took him for what he was and loved every part of him. 

“Oh Tom, look! The snowflakes are so pretty!” She beamed as she caught one in her hand, shoving it toward the grumpy boy following behind her. He merely grimaced and attempted to at least look half-interested. She continued admiring the puffs of feather-light ice, paying no attention to what was in front of her, trusting her boyfriend to watch out for her completely. 

Tom sometimes wondered how different things would be had she not been assigned his partner in charms and been forced to attend several study sessions together. If she hadn’t insisted on working together as much as possible and making sure their assignments had no errors, would he be further along in his plans? 

He had been delaying releasing the basilisk for months out of fear for her. Only her, no one else he cared enough about to even consider their well-being. His closest friends had taken his distraction as an excuse to delay plans and stop attending meetings altogether. He knew he needed to make a move soon, but he also knew he could postpone it a little longer. 

“You ought to be careful, the bridge is frozen and you could easily slip.” Despite the lack of warmth in his tone, his message was well-intended and he knew she understood that. She simply giggled and held out her hand to him, allowing his large hands to encompass her small ones and keep her balanced. 

Although he sometimes found it tedious to always make sure She was in safe hands, he also secretly adored it. Sometimes he got tired of the constant anger and despise in his head, the blood on his hands, the nagging feeling of never being enough, and simply let thoughts of her overwhelm him. 

“Look, the Three Broomsticks has their lights on!” Tom reigned in the urge to tell her that they always had their lights on, instead letting her indulge in the simplistic fun. She tugged him along hastily through the crowded streets and burst through the old wooden doors. Tom snarled at those who dared looked their way and lead the girl in his arms to the farthest table in the back. 

He was not embarrassed to be seen with her by any means. However, he absolutely despised the nasty looks she received for being with him. It wasn’t his own feelings he was concerned with; hers, on the other hand, were as delicate as a blooming flower. Tom sometimes wondered if it was the mean comments or the prospect of being humiliated that made the tears roll down her porcelain face. 

“What would you two like to drink?” Tom eyed the man who had come to take their order. He was tall and lanky, probably a graduate from last year or the one before who couldn’t find anything better to do with his time than smoke and drink. She batted her eyelashes and ordered two butter beers, unaware of the blush now coating the snob's cheeks. 

She never meant to flirt, she was just a charismatic being. Tom never reprimanded her for it and never pointed it out, not wanting her to lose the joyous nature about herself for the sake of others’ stupidity. 

“So, heard anything good lately?” Tome whipped his head back to her and narrowed his eyes. She loved to gossip. 

“I heard Walburga and Orion are engaged.” He had come to enjoy passing secrets with her. Only her. 

“They are not!’ She gasped. Tom nodded his head and smirked. “Are they not cousins?” 

“Well, yes, but the pureblood families tend to interbreed anyways. Their children will probably bear all sorts of problems.” She giggled and slapped a hand over her mouth, tho the tint to her cheeks never left. 

He caught himself almost smiling but quickly scowled as the man set their drinks down in front of them. He gave her an extra long pause, telling her to call out if she needed anything, and slowly walked away from the table. 

She took a long sip of her drink, sighing happily and looking at Tom expectantly. Truth be told, he hated the damn drink. But he indulged her in tasting it every time and then letting her have the rest. He always ended up dragging her back to the castle by the end of the day but he couldn’t deny her this simple pleasure. 

He grasped the glass and took a slow sip, swishing the amber liquid around in his mouth before swallowing. Tom hated the grime that coated his teeth every time he drank something sugary and made a mental note to brush his teeth as soon as he returned to his dorm. 

Once her drink was gone and Tom had taken three nanoscopic sips of his, she downed his as well. A glassy film covered her eyes and she began laughing uncontrollably, doubling over and clutching her stomach as the drink coursed through her. 

A rough hand on his shoulder brought Tom out of his watchful stare. Abraxas Malfoy stood next to him, a sort of excitement in his eyes as he beheld the giggling girl in front of him. Tom shook his disgusting hand off his shoulder and raised his eyebrows at his right-hand man. 

“Hello, you two! Well, don’t you look as lovely as ever!” She giggled again. 

“Why thank you, Abraxas!” 

“I was actually referring to our good friend Tommy here, but you look lovely as well.” A smirk adorned Abraxas face as she laughed even harder. If Abraxas had not been one of his most trusted followers then he would have obliviated him. He still might. 

“He does look quite lovely.” Tom simply rolled his eyes and motioned for the blonde boy to tell him whatever it was he interrupted their night for. 

“I just came to wish you both a good night and check-in.” The glint in his eyes told a different story and Tom almost pulled him into the alleyway to explain. But that would mean leaving her alone, and that was something he would never do. 

“Thank you, Abraxas. Oh! Are you excited about the quidditch game tomorrow?” Although she came from the yellow house, she adorned a different color for every game. She just liked to witness the excitement of someone winning. 

“I am, I hope you’ll be in green and black tomorrow?” He gave her a lazy grin as she nodded her head eagerly. She would not remember agreeing to that tomorrow and Abraxas would have quite the time teasing her when he sees her decked in blue instead. 

“Darling, did you want to go to the bookstore before the end of the night?” The light was dimming outside, but the shops were far from closing. With darkness came cold though, and Tom would not have her out in weather worse than this. 

“Oh, of course! I thought we could pick up a few to read before bed?” Abraxas snickered but quickly stopped once he saw the sharp look Tom diverted at him. Instead of answering, he simply shrugged his coat on and offered her a hand. He made sure her scarf was wrapped tight around her neck and her coat buttoned properly to seal in any remaining warmth. 

He held her hand tightly and led her down the snowy street. The small bookstore came into view and he quickly pulled them in to fight off the cold, leading her down to the section she adored the most. 

Tom watched as her fingers skimmed the old parchments as she lazily looked for a few to bring home. He felt bad the first few times they came because he couldn’t afford to buy her what she wanted, but she insisted she had enough money for the both of them. After many disagreements (they never argued because he couldn’t stand to make her upset), he finally accepted that she would buy them and he would read them to her. 

“I want this one, please.” Tom grabbed the rather thin book off the shelf and held it out for her to tuck in her arms. 

“Just one darling? We’ll go through that pretty quickly, maybe you should pick another one as well.” She hummed in agreement and pointed to three more books. He rolled his eyes humorously and pulled them from the shelf. 

With the books in hand, she set them on the counter and bounced on her toes as the clerk rang them up. She handed them the payment and Tom took the wrapped parcels along with her hand and made for the door. 

The walk back to the castle always felt longer, though he knew it wasn’t. Perhaps it was the impending time to sit by the fire with her curled into his side or the way her scent would wash over him and lull him to sleep. It could have been the sleep-filled nights he only seemed to find wrapped around her or the quiet the castle offered only at night. 

“Tom?” He hummed and turned to her. She had a contemplative look on her face. 

“Do you think you’ll ever get tired of me?” He stopped in his tracks, pulling her back when she attempted to carry on walking. His heart beat a thousand times faster than normal and if he thought about her words too long, he was sure it would beat out of his chest. 

He carefully placed one hand under her chin, tilting those glassy eyes to look directly into his. His sharp features made him intimidating to most people, but she was never afraid of the death that could shine in his eyes. 

“Why are you asking me that darling? Has someone said something?” Merlin forbid someone else had made her think this way. They would be dead within the hour. 

She shook her head quickly, long strands of hair falling in her eyes. She pushed them back with one hand and huffed, looking at the ground while she played with his fingers. 

“No, I was just thinking. I know I’m very different from you and your friends, and sometimes I just wonder…well…if I’m too different.” 

Tom would do anything to wipe the sorrow from her voice. He forced himself to take steadying breaths. The wrapped books thumped against the snow-packed ground as he freed both of his hands to grasp either side of her face. 

“Darling, I will not get tired of you. I enjoy the differences between us. I know I am not capable of the extent of feelings you have for me, but one day I hope to learn to feel those things.” He placed one of her hands against his beating heart, letting her feel how tilted his world had suddenly become. 

“Are you sure?” She batted those long, beautiful eyelashes up at him. 

“I am quite sure.” She nodded once, the smile taking on her face again as if she hadn’t just torn his world apart and put it back together in the span of two minutes. She grabbed the books from the ground and tucked them under one arm, wrapping the other around his and pulling him quickly towards the castle. 

There was no one else he would ever consider confessing his feelings for, good or bad. No one else could destroy him if they ever decided they were tired of him. No one else held his heart as she did. Only her. Only ever her. 

[coralinnii]

❋ If you are a villain, then let me be your accomplice ❋ feat: Jamil genre: mild hurt/comfort, budding romance note: sequel to reincarnated into a new world as the bad guy AU Jamil ver, not gender specific reader, no pronouns used, villainess!reader gets sulky, 1.7k word count 

I liivvveee! For now, anyway. I still have my job projects and midterms are upon me but I finally found some time to myself so I hope you enjoy another addition to the Villain/ess!series. Jamil is such an intriguing character with such complex emotions.

series index

Be it luck or the universe finally giving you a break but you noticed that Jamil is starting to like you…or at least tolerates you a bit more than before. 

Since that fateful incident, the competent boy was more willing to be on your side and a lot more comfortable with you, even if it’s mostly reprimanding you. 

“You shouldn’t run in the hallways, you could trip and get hurt!” “Don’t touch those flowers, they have thorns! If you wanted some, just ask me” 

Jamil’s tone was harsh, but he always offered his hand to you to help you walk with your heavy garbs on and would give you the most beautiful bouquet of flowers that you keep in your personal guest room, one that the Asim family provided considering how often you come over. 

Because of your frequent visits, you have the blessing to see the hidden sides of Jamil that you never considered even with your knowledge of this fictional world. 

Like how his voice gets higher when he gets frustrated or surprised, or how animated he gets with his arms whenever Kalim does something spontaneous (which is pretty much all of the time). You especially like how he tries to hide his face whenever he gets embarrassed, especially after finding out how weak he actually was to sincere compliments. 

“Will you teach me to dance, Jamil? You look so cool when I see you” 

“I’m sure you can find someone much more capable than me” 

“Please? You’re so beautiful when you do it” 

“…If I have the time, then” 

“Yay!~”

In your bliss, you’ve forgotten all about your previous plans to leave this kingdom if not for your father asking you about your thoughts on some academies that were recommended to him by the Asim head. 

You wondered about that now. You wanted to leave this land in hopes of avoiding your bad ending with Jamil but with your growing friendship with both Jamil and Kalim, you feel more reluctant to leave them. You asked your father to give you some time and postpone your applications, just so you can rearrange your thoughts. 

Despite your predestined future, you were reincarnated into a luxurious life. Being a second-born in an established and rich family, you were not bound by responsibilities or expectations aside from noble standards. Your only job was apparently to marry well which could be stifling to some but you choose to ignore that in favor of enjoying your youth. Marriage talk is still far for you to consider and you have better things to worry about. 

Like wondering why Jamil is avoiding you again!

“Kalim, tell me the truth. Does Jamil hate me?” You asked your fair-haired friend who had a sudden feeling of deja vu. 

“There’s no way! Jamil really cares about you, I can tell” Kalim reassured you, pressing a fist to his chest in honesty. He had seen how much you matter to his dear friend. 

Kalim saw how meticulous Jamil was when arranging the bouquet with your favorite flowers, just because you wanted a singular one from the garden, and he was there when Jamil was trying to hide his smile when you were adamant to learn how to dance from him because you love how he looked when he danced. 

Jamil hating you? That’s crazy. 

“He won’t even be in the same room as me anymore” you rebutted, pouting as you were sure Jamil didn’t want it to be obvious that he was avoiding you, but you definitely noticed with how much you miss his company. 

“Then we’ll just make sure he will be!” Kalim yelled out, his expression screaming ‘I have a great idea!’. This worries you. 

Jamil was huffing, running through the hallways with as much caution as he could. A servant told him that Kalim requested him to come over to his room as soon as he could. Even if he knew the Kalim wouldn’t care if he was a little slow, as a servant of the esteemed Asim family he can’t ignore the supposed urgency for his assistance. 

Finally reaching Kalim’s room, Jamil took a few seconds to adjust his appearance before knocking on the door, announcing his presence. But Kalim did not respond from the other side of the door. 

“Young master Kalim, it’s Jamil” Jamil announced his presence again. Still no answer. 

Jamil let out a small sigh. Kalim must have fallen asleep while waiting, he assumed. Used to this situation, Jamil slowly opened the door and inspected the room. The room was quiet with no sign of the Asim heir. He looked over to the large bed that had its canopy curtains loose, covering the bed. 

“So I was right, Kalim did fall asleep” Jamil suppressed his exasperation as he walked towards the bed, pulling the curtains aside. 

“Young master Kalim, what did you need from me that was-“ 

To Jamil’s surprise, it was not Kalim but you sitting on his master’s bed, looking somewhat angry. The dark-haired servant started looking around the room presumably in search of Kalim and for him to explain this situation. But since he wasn’t here, you volunteer to explain yourself. 

“Kalim is currently in the village partaking in the weekly market,” you raised your hand when you saw the look of panic on Jamil’s face “He didn’t go alone, he has someone with him. That newly assigned tutor of his, I believe” 

Jamil looked visibly calmer but you could tell that he still had some questions swirling in his head. It’s strange but you don’t feel surprised by how much you could tell about Jamil, that’s just how close you felt to him. But apparently, that isn’t mutual. 

“I asked Kalim to call you on my behalf since you seem to be avoiding me.” 

“I assure you, I could never be so rude as to avoid you-“ 

“But it feels like it! You don’t talk to me anymore, and I haven’t been able to see you as often as we used to” you knew that you sounded very childish, in fact this whole conversation is childish but you didn’t want whatever was going on between you and Jamil to continue and maybe even someday break apart this new bond. 

“I just don’t want to drift apart from you” you whispered to yourself but Jamil with how keen he was, overheard your thoughts. 

The truth was, he was avoiding you. Some time ago, he overheard the conversation between your father and Kalim’s father about recommendations for oversea studies and found out that you wanted to leave this kingdom. Jamil felt a pain in his chest he didn’t expect. To his surprise, he found himself feeling sad over the idea that he may not see you again for a long time, maybe even forever. Unlike him, you were free to travel with nobody to chain you down or obligations to come back. You could walk out of his life and never return. 

Jamil didn’t like that feeling, so he decided he should nip this new friendship in the bud before it hurts even more. 

But there he was, second-guessing his choice as he watches the look of sadness on your face, confessing that the mere few days without him left you upset. But still, he crushed that doubt (and hidden glee in the shared sadness) and chose to put on a face of professional indifference. 

“I apologize for upsetting you but I’m sure there are more capable companions than I for you” Jamil spoke to you so formally, just like the days of your first meeting. “When you start your oversea studies, there will be a great diversity of people that will be worthy of your time” 

“Wait, when did you hear about my plans to go overseas?” 

Jamil's face paled as he realized his mistake. That was apparently not common knowledge amongst the servants and he just admitted that he knows because he heard something he had no right to as a worker of the esteemed Asim family. 

Quickly, Jamil fell to his knees and dropped his gaze to the floor. This shocked you and quickly rushed to the floor to pull Jamil to his feet when he spoke again. 

“I committed a crime. I overheard something that was not meant for my ears, therefore I will accept any punishment.” Jamil's tone was unwavering which scared you. A young teen like him speaking about punishment over a mere accident was a terrifying sight. What's more, he treated you less like a friend and more like an authoritative figure of his, which broke your heart.

“Jamil, I’m not going to punish you. And I never will!” You assured your friend, glancing to the door to make sure no one heard the two of you. “And Jamil, I haven’t decided if I want to study overseas” 

You just kept on surprising Jamil. 

“I thought about traveling to study but now…I don’t think I want to travel when I’m just going to miss you too much” you confessed your reasons before panicking slightly “and Kalim, of course! And my family!” 

To anyone else, they’d think you were being foolish. Who wouldn’t want to travel and experience the world? Even Jamil dreamt about it, where he wasn’t bound by his obligations and was free to go wherever he pleases, maybe make a name for himself rather than simply Kalim’s shadow. If he was honest, he envied you for being someone unbounded or shadowed by anything or anyone. 

Even with your embarrassing confession, you can tell that Jamil was unconvinced which left you exasperated before continuing on. “You and I finally got closer and I didn’t want to just suddenly leave like that. I know I’m being childish but that’s how I feel.” 

You were being childish, Jamil thought. There you go again being foolish and nonsensical as Kalim with your emotions controlling your thoughts instead of being level-headed. To refuse a chance to see the world just to keep a superficial friendship with a mere servant like him is crazy, ridiculous, absolutely stupid…

But why does he feel so warm inside? This bubbly feeling of happiness growing in his chest? 

“How irrational can you be? To forgo an opportunity like this for a mere servant like me…” 

“But you’re not some ‘mere servant’,” you puff out your cheeks over that self-deprecating comment, grabbing your friend’s hands and encasing them tightly in yours. “You are the one and only Jamil Viper, someone very important to me.” 

Without any way to hide his face, you got a glimpse of something rare. An embarrassed Jamil.

Bonus

"Hey Jamil..."

"Yes?"

"If I do think about traveling, would you like to come with me?"

"What would you need me for?"

"Just be there with me, enjoy the world together with me...like equals"

"...If I have the time, then...I would like that"

"Yay!~"

[ts1m1kas]

Original Ask: i saw that you’re opening requests for f1 drivers.. can i request angst to fluff with seb vettel where him and reader are dating but he breaks up with the her to focus on the wdc (set in 2013) and she ends up rebounding with fernando which makes seb really jealous,, anyways after winning he publicly confesses his love for the reader or something, u can choose whether the reader gets back with seb or stays with fernando idm teehee ❤️❤️ love youu (anonymous)

Word Count: 1095 words

(author's note: another longer one !! i did think i was going to have to postpone it but i managed to get it finished for you all 🩷)

Sebastian always knew he wanted to be a World Champion. Ever since he was a little boy in his racing kart, he knew he wanted to be one of the best racing drivers the world had ever seen. He also knew that he would sacrifice anything to achieve his dreams, but he never thought it would actually get to that point.

It was mid-way through the 2013 Formula 1 season and Sebastian was one of the strongest contenders for the Championship. His girlfriend at the time, Y/N, couldn't be more proud of Sebastian, especially since she knew how hard he had worked to get to his current position.

However, after a meeting with his strategists, team leaders and various other important people, Sebastian's perspective of his relationship had been tainted and darkened. Somehow the meeting had managed to brainwash him into thinking Y/N was a distraction. An enemy. An obstacle; preventing his Championship dreams from coming true.

The next step in Sebastian's Championship chase was a heated argument with Y/N in his drivers room. Insults were hurled, every single one out of anger, not one of them holding any truth. And then came the final devastating line;

“I'm done. We're over,” Sebastian said. His gaze was cold as he stared at Y/N, eyes void of any emotion.

Her lip trembled as she nodded, her eyes shining with unshed tears. Y/N turned on her heel and headed towards the door. As her fingers grasped the handle, she hesitated.

“Good luck with the Championship. I hope it's worth it.”

With that, she opened the door and walked out.

Eventually the season came to a close. Sebastian Vettel was World Champion. Again. But something wasn't right. He should be happy, right? He had gotten what he wanted all along.

Wrong. All Sebastian felt while holding his trophy was guilt and regret. The pit in his stomach deepened even further when he saw Y/N in the crowd with a man's arm wrapped around her waist. His eyes moved to the face of the individual and he did a double take when he realised who it was.

Fernando Alonso.

Sebastian had been too caught up in training and strategizing to see that Y/N had moved on. He saw the adoration in her eyes as she looked at the man next to her. He knew that look all too well, because that's how she used to look at him.

Maybe they were just friends? Sebastian's brain was thinking of every possible explanation. He hadn't actually seen or heard any confirmation they were dating. Although he had been too caught up in his own life to even notice anything or anyone else.

Before he could realise, he was being forced into an interview on stage.

“Sebastian!” The interviewer began, “World Champion again, how does it feel?”

“Uh- yeah it feels great obviously, it's always been my dream to be up here, winning as many times as possible.”

“Do you have anything you'd like to say to the fans in front of you?”

“Well, thank you for all your continued support, it means the world to me,” He said smiling at the crowd, “But most of all, I want to say sorry to one person in particular. Y/N, I wish I could take back everything I said to you all those months ago. This victory feels hollow without you to celebrate it with.”

The interviewer looked stunned and so did the crowd.

Y/N's face dropped when she heard Sebastian's improvised speech. As she felt the weight of thousands of eyes on her, she began to move through the crowd. Pushing through bodies, she desperately tried to escape the masses of people. Fernando was hot on her heels, not wanting his girlfriend to be alone.

Sebastian saw her rush off through the crowd and he knew he had royally messed everything up.

"Y/N, wait! I'm sorry, just wait please-" Sebastian thrust the microphone he was holding into the interviewer's hand and scrambled off the stage. He shoved his way through the fans frantically, following the footsteps of his ex-girlfriend.

He eventually found her (and Fernando) outside the Ferrari garage. Y/N's face was pressed into Fernando's chest as she sobbed. Sebastian watched from afar, realising what he had actually done. He knew he needed to speak to Y/N, but he didn't know if she would want to speak to him.

Sebastian eventually mustered up the courage to walk over to the pair. Fernando spotted him first, his face twisting into one of disgust.

"What do you want Vettel? You have your Championship, come to ask for my girlfriend too?"

"No! I just- I wanted-"

"You were so bold a moment ago? Spit it out, don't you think you've done enough damage for one day?" Fernando spat.

"Look, I know what I did was wrong, and I want to apologise.”

Y/N moved away from her boyfriend's chest and looked up at the blonde man infront of her.

“I'll meet you in your drivers room Fernando, I'd like to hear this.”

The Spaniard nodded, pressed a kiss to Y/N's forehead and walked off.

An awkward silence fell over the pair.

"So, you and Fernando? When did that happen?"

"Why does that matter? We broke up months ago, Sebastian. I moved on, you clearly didn't."

"Look, I'm glad you're happy now. If I knew about you and Fernando I never would've made a scene, I promise. I just realised that all the Championships and celebrations have meant nothing without you.”

"Too little too late Sebastian. I wanted you to win as much as you wanted to win yourself. But you couldn't see that. You were blinded by your ambitions, and I couldn't compete with that.”

"I'm sorry.”

"I know you are.”

Y/N stared at Sebastian pitifully. She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him gently. He was taken aback, but he accepted the embrace gratefully.

"You'll find someone else to celebrate with, you're Sebastian Vettel.”

"It still won't be the same without you.”

The pair finally broke out of the hug and tears glistened in Sebastian's eyes.

"Fernando's waiting for me, I should probably go. Goodbye Sebastian.”

"Goodbye Y/N. I hope you can forgive me someday.”

"I've always forgiven you Seb, before you even knew you were sorry."

With one last shared look, Y/N turned around and headed off to find Fernando, leaving Sebastian standing alone. He had achieved his dreams and more, but at the cost of his future.

[misguidedasgardian]

The Winter Sun (25)

25. A sea of doubt

MASTERLIST

Summary: The final battle approaches 

Pairing: Cregan Stark x Fem!Targaryen Reader 

Warnings: Cursing, medieval and asoiaf customs, AGE GAP, Cregan is 12 years OLDER than reader), arranged marriage, mentions and implied non-con and involuntary imprisonment, birth of a baby and all that comes with it,, fear of miscarrying, might miss some warnings

+18, MINORS DNI

Wordcount: 2.9 k

Notes: uffff HERE IT ISSSS OUR SECOND BABY

Aemond was preparing it all, he found in the small town adjacent to your castle a willing Septon, and your castle had a small chapel where the ceremony could be held.

Like his mother’s favorite child, he was close to the Gods, it meant quite a lot to him for you to be his in their eyes, under the faith of the seven, not under those false, Old Gods like the pagan Cregan Stark

He couldn’t be happier, you were getting heavy with his child, maybe two months shy of giving birth, it had to be soon.

But as he was getting ready to fetch you, having already prepared a dress and jewelry for you… he received an important letter from his men on Harrenhal

They were a week away to be surrounded by the Northerners and the Knights of the Vale, all of them together had come to destroy them. The spies had just spotted the great army marching past the Crossroads Inn

“The greatest army the seven Kingdoms had ever seen”

He only smiled because the bigger the army, the slower they were, and the easier way for him to burnt them all with his Dragon

But he needed to gather his own army , with the Baratheons and the Royal army, it was going to be easy to surround the army between them and Harrenhal, and from there it was going to be an easy defeat.

But he had to postpone the ceremony

His child might be born a bastard

But no matter, his brother will declare him legitimate, and he was going to marry you afterwards anyways. 

He went to say goodbye to you, he found you as he always did, with a sad look on your eyes and a tight line as your lips. 

The only thing you said to him was

“I wish you good fortunes in the wars to come, my prince”, and the only thing he said was to promise you he was going to come back before the baby comes, you didn’t want him to

With that in his mind, he left you in your home once again, climbing into Vhagar’s back, and flying away 

You saw the monstrous dragon flying away from your home and you could only feel relief, your own dragon flying around the cliffs she knew so well, and you prayed to the Old Gods that Aemond would never return again.

Because every breath that you drew was agony, when you think about Rickon, it had been months in which he had been growing without you, and your only wish was to see him again, to take him in your arms and hug him against your chest. Your hand went instinctively to your belly, feeling so conflicted

Was it Cregan’s? or was it Aemond’s?

You couldn’t escape Aemond, you couldn’t escape him taking you, and possibly impregnating you, but, you could escape being married to him.

Aemond had left, and he didn’t marry you before he did 

After that… threat, it felt like threat to you, marrying Aemond, there wasn’t really much you can do to avoid it, he couldn’t make you say the words, he couldn’t make you marry him, but right now, you didn’t feel like you had the strength to fight him, this baby was draining you of your energy constantly

If the Baby was Cregan’s, your due date should arrive very shortly… a few weeks maybe, your belly button had popped out of your belly, which happened right before Rickon was born… 

But your belly wasn’t as big as RIckon’s had been

The uncertainty was killing you. The prospect of your baby having dark hair will give Aemond exactly what he needed to send it back to Winterfell, another child you would not be able to raise as your own. The thought alone made you cry and as a deep ache had settled in your chest, you whined when you felt a pressure in your lower belly

“Ah!”, and then… a strong contraction. 

If it was Aemond’s baby, it was too soon

Too soon

And a crippling fear got a hold on you, thinking you might lose your unborn baby

“No no no, please!”, you cried, “please”, you didn’t think you could survive losing a child, so fat bitter tears fell down your eyes, “not yet, not yet ARGH!”, a contraction wrecked your body again, it was all so sudden

Your screams could be heard so loud in the castle, a maid was by your side in a second

“Your grace”, yes Aemond had insisted you would claim back your title of princess, “what is it?”

“It’s the baby”, you whined, “I think it’s coming!”, and if it was like you were calling it, your water broke, wetting the floor beneath you. You whimpered, more scared than in pain

It happened so quick

A cloud of pain numbed you, as the maid called in the castle’s midwife, who brought in a young assistant, they helped you out of your dress and put on you a soft night shift, they released your hair, and soon it stuck to your forehead with your sweat

They help you to the bed, it all happened so quickly.

“You are doing it great”, the midwife said sweetly

“What if it is too soon?”. you whined, “it’s a little over seven moons”, you explain. She look at you sweetly

“All is going to be fine, your grace”, she reassured you, and you believe her

You had felt your baby kicking all week, so you became certain it was going to be alright.

“AH!”, a strong and painful contraction made you rethink that statement, it was pain, pain all over. 

It was the worst pain you ever felt in your entire life.

With Rickon it all had been sudden, you had never felt anything like it, but it happened rather quickly, you had heard of women who had suffered for hours and hours, but Rickon came quickly and without much fuss

You were lucky

But you felt like your luck was running out

You whined when you saw the faces of the midwives and maids constricting more and more in worried gazed as minutes turned to hours.

It was tortuous, the pain came and went lin waves, hitting you hard like a storm against the rocks

“Push your grace! it’s time!”

And you did, with all your strength, you did, in what it seemed like hours of excruciating pain with no end.

And then… with a last push you expelled your baby from your body

And even though there was an end to the pain… there was nothing else…

Only silence

You stopped crying in relief, to start worrying

The midwife wouldn’t look at you, you trying to raise your head to look over the bloodied sheets but you couldn’t see anything either

“What is happening?”, you cried, “why isn’t he crying?”, they were tense minutes in which the only thing that could be heard was your labored breaths and then…

A cry, your baby’s cry

You cried with relief 

“It’s a healthy baby boy, your grace!”, the midwife said, “a little small, but he is strong as a horse!”, you were so relieved, so relieved to hear that, that you didn’t care when she placed your baby in your arms, and you saw his silver strands on his head.

Another son

You cuddled against your chest, he was crying his little lungs out, but as soon as he felt you, he got quiet, trying to open his eyes

He was so beautiful, still covered in afterbirth, but he was so small 

“Hello little one”, she was right, he was small, very much so, but still, he looked healthy, he had all his toes, all his fingers. You kissed his bloodied forehead, “my baby”, you whispered, “and mine alone”, you whispered

You felt incredibly relieved, he was well, healthy, and that is all that mattered

The maids cleaned your son, cleaned you, the bed, all of it. And let you be with your baby

A million thoughts were going through your mind once the maester came to see you and gave you milk of the poppy to soothe your aching body. You watched your son right next to you, sleeping, and you believed he didn’t look like Aemond nor Cregan, he was only a newborn.

Perhaps you were never going to know

But the white hair… he was small, that truly made you think, doubt, fear

Maybe Aemond was never going to come back to the castle, perhaps he was going to die, and he was going to leave you alone, in your home at least

What then?

If Aemond is not here, would you return to Winterfell? What about your new baby? was he going to be welcomed? Rickon needed you, he needed his mother, he needed you, the North had Sara to lead them until Rickon comes of age, but he was going to need you, but… Was the people of the North going to receive you?

There was so many things in your mind, that you barely heard when a maid entered your room slowly and gently 

“What is it?”, you asked softly

“I need to speak to you, your grace”, she said, she seemed nervous

“Speak”, you encouraged gently, caressing your son’s cheek, you wondered how you were going to name him, Aemond had barely suggested names.

“Your grace, now that the baby is here”, the maid, the oldest one, that had known you since you were a child, approached you, “I need to tell you something”

“What is it?”, you asked, concerned

“Prince Aemond went to fight the Northerner army”, she said, and that truly surprised you, “and the knights of the Vale, but also… Daemon Targaryen''

“Daemon?”, you asked, amazed, “really?”, she nodded enthusiastically. 

“I heard him talking to the maester, the Northerner army gathered, it is one of the greatest the seven kingdoms has ever seen”

Daemon was the only one who could face Aemond and actually have a chance, but his chance will certainly increase if…

You helped him

“Why are you telling me this?”, you asked her

“Queen Rhaenyra sits the iron Throne”, you gasped, “the only Green army left is in Harrenhal, the last stand of the Greens!”, she said

“Rhaenyra sits on the Iron Throne?”, you asked, wanting to cry from happiness

“Yes!”, she said, “and the final battle is going to be fought in Harrenhal!”

You looked at your baby in your arms, it could only take two days for you to be ready again. You could go to Harrenhal, nobody was going to stop you, you could leave your baby here, he was going to be safe… but you doubted, what if Aemond made it, and attacked you? he could kill you… 

And then, your baby, with silver hair, he opened his eyes and revealed a pair of icy blue eyes, gray almost, just like Cregan’s

You gasped.

He truly could be Cregan’s, you had to fight for the Northerners!, you had to help them, you had to help end this madness

Aemond had arriveD before everyone, but thanks to his spies he knew the army was within a two day march away from the castle

He was tempted to go and meet them halfway and burn them all

But his army was halfway as well

It needed to be decisive and a powerful hit to the Black forces.

And after this, he was going to retake the capital and save his mother and sister. His drunk of a brother could be gone for all he cared, he was going to be King next. 

ALL WAS GOING TO BE WELL 

He had the girl, he was going to have a child, he was going to become king, who cared if he had to betray and force his way into it? it is what he deserved

As he grabbed the stones of the battlements of Harrenhal, and looked beyond those lands to the North, he breathed in all the excitement for the battles to come. 

But as soon as the sun set on the very next day, Aemond, with horror, saw the wood surrounding Harrenhal lit up with a hundred thousands of torches. Threatening him,  teasing him, they surrounded the huge fortress completely, there was no way out for him

If he had been only a simple man.

That night Harrenhal, and all the men within didn’t sleep. The Northerners and the Knights of the Vale blew horns and played the drums all night long, to completely destroy the morale of the soldiers within the burnt walls.

And it had worked

Aemond haven't sleep a wink the whole night, he didn’t even attempt to go to bed, he just stood over the battlements until the very first light, were this own soldiers started to prepare

The captains of the small group of soldiers came to him, asking him what they were going to do about the huge army waiting like a hungry wolf to a dying prey in front of it, and yet not doing anything.

Aemond had to win some time, his own army could surround them, press them against the castle, and then they could hit them from above and from inside, and the Baratheons and the royal army led by Criston was going to kill them from the back

Oh if only

As he was organizing the boiling of thousands of gallons of oil that was going to be dropped over the heads of the savages from the North, when Aemond heard a sharp growl that made him tremble, although he was never going to admit it

The biggest army in the world was not alone

His uncle had come for him

“I want her to know I’m here”, said Cregan,a s he looked amongst the trees at the high walls of Harrenhal

“She probably believes you are dead”, muttered Deamon, looking at him, the love he saw in the Stark’s eyes was incredible

“I don’t care, remember what I said, no destruction to the castle, we don’t know where she is…”

“Yes, I know”, he said, almost bored. Daemon put his helmet on, and then walked towards Caraxes, climbing to his saddle, and then he commanded him to fly

And the battle started.

Caraxes flew over Harrenhal teasing Aemond and Vhagar. The greens distributed their efforts in all points of the battlements, following the lead of the Blacks that had surrounded the castle, but now, early in the morning they marched towards the weakest point of the walls, focusing all the efforts in one point of the walls. 

The wall was overrun was the Knights of the Vale siege weaponry pretty easily, half day in and they already where breaching the walls

The battle was brutal

Specially when the Baratheons and the remains of the usurper’s royal army arrived and attacked the forces of the blacks that were yet to enter the castle wall’s

A battle that was going to be told throughout the ages,

The castle was quickly overrun, but every soldier of the black forces waited for Cregan’s command. The Stark had clear instructions that he was to be the one to enter the castle first with his best twenty men. The goal was to find you, and the people inside didn’t suffer the cruelties of war. He wanted to secure you first, before he could let his soldiers take the castle.

But he couldn’t find you anywhere

You weren’t here

He felt a desperation inside his chest.

You knew that monster might hurt you, the way sick men harm women, but he could never guess that he could… actually end your life

No, he couldn’t lose hope, he had survived to find you, you couldn’t be gone. No, he believed Sara’s visions, you had so much to life together, you had to be still of this world.

As he was hastily walking towards a huge window… he heard it.

He ran towards it so he could see outside towards the skies, he would recognize that growling anywhere.

Just as Vhagar and Caraxes intertwined in a mortal embrace to kill each other, another dragon soared the skies, a white, huge dragon 

Vhaelar

Vhagar met Caraxes in the skies, he was quickly to bit his wings, but the blood wyrm turned in the air, scratching the Queen of dragon’s chest and making her release him. That is when Vhaelar appeared from between the skies.

Aemond couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

For a second he believed you had come to his aid, but his idea quickly disappeared when Vhaelar close her huge jawa surrounding VHagar’s neck

Caraxes took the opportunity to burn the old dragon’s body and then bit off one of his huge wings.

You were in the air, fighting with dragons.

Cregan saw with wide eyes as you took the Queen of Dragons off of the skies. Vhaelar released Vhagar, that fell limply to the lake underneath. The water column that formed when VHagar fall into the lake was as tall as the castle, but nobody would ever believe it. 

Your huge she-dragon kept herself on the air with the help of her huge wings, and just as Daemon’s Caraxes was also trying to keep himself in the air, he was hurt, but he was going to be alright in time. 

But under Cregan’s and Daemon’s surprised gaze, you made your dragon turn around in the air, and flied away

Cregan whined, concerned, as fast as you had came, you were leaving Harrenhal without even stepping a foot within its walls

Without the support of a dragon the Green forces were done for.

They were completely alienated, having captured Lord Borros Baratheon, Criston Cole and another important men

But Cregan couldn’t care less about that.

He needed to find you. 

More notes!: So... are you still with doubts? hehehe, so he is small... so he could be Aemond's... and has silver hair, but it has eyes with a similar color as Cregan's... and reader did spend a rough period with Aemond without much eating and drinking... so it could be that... anyways I'm not a doctor JEJEJE

A little messy I felt, but I really wanted to write this, up next we will see the reader's POV and FINALLY THE REUNION

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