#there's just something adorable their spirit animal interacting with each other in a gentle way

[ask-but-beware-the-consequences]

I saw a drawing and I couldn't resist. It's so them 💙 Summer collection piece number 2 ^^

Original with signature is below the cut:

[justanothercloudinthesky]

Hii ! May I ask for a male haikyuu matchup please ?

I’m a girl and I go by she/her, my zodiac sign is Leo and my actual Mbti is ISTP-T.

Personality :

I am an ambivert ( a mix beween introvert and extrovert). When I’m surrounded by strangers, I tend to be really shy and calm. When I’m with my friends or people I’m comfortable with, I’m more extroverted. I laugh and smile really easily and basically laugh everyday. I am seeing as the protective friend that can stand for themselves ( but it sometimes depend on the situation) and for others because I can’t stand injustice. I'm also quite stubborn and sarcastic but I love to « be chill ». To continue, I’m collected but have a certain attitude. All that doesn't mean that i'm not polite and respectful because i really am. Finally I’d say that I’m creative, empathetic and passionate but emotionally vulnerable and really self-critical : sometimes I just feel like I could be a way better person, less « mean » and more « gentle ». I also know to be serious when it is necessary. I’m also really open-minded and trustfull but I sometimes don’t have a lot of self-confidence (but I don’t show it and just pretend to be). I don’t like people who assume when they had make fun of someone or something like this.

Hobbies :

I really like to cuddle, just chill in general, listen to RNB/ US Rap ( I listen to Quintelli, Summer walker, HER, SZA, Muni Long, Brent Faiyaz, Drake, Future, Tyler the creator, Bryson tiller, Travis scott, Gunna…) and I play piano. I also love to watch anime/Disney+/Netflix, horror movies, shopping…

Appareance :

I’m a black west indian girl and my height 5’7 (171cm). I have black 4c hair (I often wear braids) and slightly almond-shaped dark brown eyes. I have glasses but I never wear them. I have a mini brown mark under my right eye because of an accident with boiling oil when i was younger (yes i was a little but clumsy 😭). My general style is a mix between streetwear, Y2k and fancy.

Thank you so much and have a wonderful day !!

Hi, Thank you so much for Checking The Weather, Your forecast is...

Aone Takanobu!

Ah yes, Aone. He's kinda an under-rated character but I do honestly think this would be an absolutely adorable couple. Aone is super sweet despite his outward intimidation factor. He's shown that not only by his words in the anime but also by being so respectful to Hinata and his teammates.

I believe Aone also has a strong sense of at least order (if not justice) as he's usually the one keeping people in line through his stares. I think he would also admire the heck outta you for your calming, yet firm, personality. Hear me out, you've got an internal sense of passion, and as shown with his interactions with Hinata, Aone really respects that

He'd awe-struck by your creativity and open-mindedness, and would never take advantage of your trusting spirit. You'd bring a sense of joy and passion into his life with your smile that Aone would do almost anything to keep. I think also in a way he would encourage you to be a better person too. He wouldn't find you mean, but would help you find a way to put the effort you spend stubbornly caring to come off a little softer. I headcanon that Aone would accidently fall for your really pretty brown eyes, he just has that vibe.

I don't know if you'd necessarily find too much overlap in hobbies, but that's not a bad thing at all! You would honestly be able to bring the adventure of trying something new to each other! He's also a cuddle bug so that's something- hed use you as a human shield during horror movie jumpscares. I also honestly think he loves to listen to you play piano. He feels his hands are too big but is touched beyond belief if you put your hands over his hands and help him.

Overall i think it would be a really wholesome couple, and I think you'd honestly make him really really happy

Second:

Kenma, he honestly was a super close second. But adter working it a bit i think it could get a tiny bit dull if neither of you made an effort

Third:

Daichi, I don't know why but he was my first thought and I think he'd be your best friend, i just don't think that chemistry would come naturally.

I hope you liked it, please let me know if you did! And Thanks for checking your Weather Report

[emerald-amidst-gold]

Okay, I need to rant because I’ve had this thought of “Why isn’t Solas a bi option in DA:I?” for so freaking long. However, I didn’t really think more about it other than, “Well, maybe because it’s going for a specific aspect of forbidden love. A softness and gentleness that wouldn’t work with a male Lavellan.” But no. The more I think about it, the more that explanation doesn’t make SENSE! 

So, as you play, you talk with Solas, you get to know Solas, he gets to know you and blah blah. BUT, have you ever noticed that NONE of the conversation voice lines change depending on your gender? Solas never once points out a direct correlation about your gender. The man studies SPIRITS, who, for all intents and purposes, have NO gender. So, the whole argument of “Oh, well, he’s from the time of Arlathan. It was probably a very traditional minded place that would frown on same sex relationships.” Now, that I can understand since most of Thedas operates the same way, but our dear wolf is the god of REBELLION. Do you think even for one second that Solas would have given a damn about what others thought of him and his decisions? Especially when he, in various moments, tells Blackwall, Sera, whoever, that he was hot headed and young, that he thought he was right about everything. Yes, that more or less foreshadows the things he ended doing with the Evanuris and the Veil, but the principle is the same for his own personal choices. 

So, taking that concept into mind, let’s go back to the perspective of the Solavellan romance. While the voice lines never change depending on your gender, the options of how your Inquisitor responds do. However, only to FLIRT. Literally. That’s all. That is all that changes. And while I do like the flirting options because “Oh, hello, Mr. Smooth. How you doing?”, sometimes I don’t pick them even when I am a female Lavellan because they feel..hollow to me. Why? Well, for one, they seem to come at very inopportune times. Like for example, when Solas is discussing the identity of spirits and how they’re not considered people because they have no physical form, you can literally just disregard anything of what he just said in favor of flirting. I dislike that. It comes off as you aren’t interested in what he has to say because your mind is fixated on the physical qualities behind those words; something he just more or less said shouldn’t matter! So, I, depending on my Inquisitor, always choose anything BUT the flirting option for that conversation. It’s more meaningful to me that your Lavellan interacts with Solas in a heartfelt way rather than a sexual way. 

So, that leads me back to why I think Solas should have been a bisexual option. Since the conversations don’t change, the major scenes don’t change, and your overall bond with Solas doesn’t change, why should it matter that your female or male? My current Inquisitor, Fane, has just as much of an attachment to Solas as a male than if he were female. Granted, I have taken liberties with headcanons and fanfiction to shape a deeper relationship between the two (I’m sorry. I’m a sucker for past lives AUs), but if most people, not just me, can think in such a way, then why couldn’t the developers? What? Is Male Lavellan too base for Solas to offer to take away the vallaslin? Is a possible romantic relationship too scandalous, even though we have various same sex relationships in the series? It’s not like I’m angry and kicking my feet like, “Why can’t we have the kiss scene as a male? It’s not fair!”. Hell, with Fane’s story, Solas and he don’t even kiss until after the Temple of Mythal! I’m serious! Maybe not even then! Why? Because, one; Fane isn’t an overly affectionate person; he’s subdued, but mostly confused of what he’s feeling. And two: I freaking LIVE for relationships that are centered around an EMOTIONAL connection; not physical. Fane and Solas were in an emotional relationship centuries before Inquisition; mainly, when Fane was still a dragon. So, that relationship simply continued once Fane regained most of his memories and Solas stopped being all, “You deserve better than me.”. Well, it wasn’t THAT simple, but you get the point. Fane and Solas grew close through learning about each other and overcoming prejudice that the two had about each other; not through physical actions. 

Anyways, back to the main point, Solas should have been bisexual. I see the romance as a spiritual connection; not a physical one, despite the kiss scenes because even those are very reserved, very subdued, and very careful (Except for the first one. HO!). Even so, they didn’t even have to integrate those animations for the male lavellan model to placate people. No, I would have simply been happy that it was ACKNOWLEDGED in game that you were in relationship with Solas; kiss or no kiss. There are asexual people, you know? Just a thought. 

Anyways, thank you for coming to my ted talk, even if it is a little scattered. My thoughts like to jump a lot. However, this isn’t me bashing Female Lavellan or anything. I just feel like a lot of people were robbed. Gender doesn’t adhere to emotions or ideals. Love is love; no matter the form someone takes. You love a person for their personality, not their hair, eyes, or what they have biologically. You love a person for their spirit, their mind, their way of thinking. The physical aspects are simply bonuses that allow you to see the person for which their personality embodies. THAT is what the Solavellan romance is to me, and that’s why I adore it so much and why I thought it could work for either Lavellan because nothing changes to make one gender more preferable than the other.

[vs-redemption]

who are your favorite top ten black clover characters & ships? talk about them! ~tat!

From Cindy: Hello tat! I hope you are doing well today and thank you for visiting my blog. It was really fun to write this because I got the chance to really think about the characters in depth. I’ll be honest, I’m not much of a shipper so I couldn’t come up with 10. I did my best to think of and write about as many ships and brotps as I could though.

Also, I got your other ask about BNHA as well! I have a Japanese lesson I need to prepare for this evening, but I’ll definitely get that posted tomorrow sometime!! Thanks again!!

This is very long, so I put it under a cut :)

Top Ten Black Clover Characters

Yami Sukehiro

I love everything about this guy. He’s hilarious, number one. Everything he says cracks me up and the nicknames he uses for people are gold. I like that he insults people and makes toilet jokes so casually. He comes off crass, but it’s the fact that he treats everyone equally that makes me respect him so much. He holds everyone, including himself, to the same standards. He doesn’t care about your past, wealth, appearance, gender, unconventional magic abilities or wacky personality. No matter who you are, he will call you out if you’re not acting the way you should, but will also back you up and support you when it’s needed. He’s a great leader because he treats everyone equally and is also very accepting that everyone is different.

Luck Voltia

Luck was one of the first characters I fell in love with. I don’t have a lot deep meaning behind how I feel like I do with Yami though. I just really enjoy his chaotic energy and the fact that he wants to fight people all the time. I also think his magic is super badass. His little lightning boots and gloves are so cute. I just wanna cuddle him and ruffle his hair.

Finral Roulacase

I feel so bad for Finral. This poor love starved boy doesn’t deserve the heaping amounts of anxiety he always seems to be feeling. I know he’s supposed to be the ‘perverted’ character, but compared to characters from other anime (Mineta [BNHA] Meliodas [SDS]) he’s not that bad. He tries so hard to be a gentleman by taking people on dates, complimenting them, giving them flowers, and not physically molesting them lol but they never give him a second glance. I also love his character growth so far. Watching him find self-worth beyond being just a mode of transportation, and confidence enough to stand up to his brother has been really fun to watch. I’m so proud of him and I think he’s amazing!

Zora Ideale

This guy. Haha His blunt honesty is so uncomfortable but hilarious at the same time. Like Yami, he calls people out but is somehow so much more offensive about it. I love how he just gives people unsolicited criticism and then adds injury to insult like “oh by the way, here’s a freaking stink bug in your nostril.” To be fair though, he is just as harsh on himself and will acknowledge (to himself) when he made a mistake. His backstory is also so tragic! It is seriously messed up what happened to his dad, but I love that Zora uses that trauma to try and change the word for the better by being the best magic knight he can be and also encouraging (threatening?) other magic knights to be better too. He could’ve so easily become a villain, but he didn’t and I think that’s really honorable.

Mereoleona Vermillion

Oh my god. I love this woman so much. The fact that she was supposed to be the captain of the Crimson Lions but said “nope” and then just went off by herself to live in the most dangerous places in the wild to get stronger is just phenomenal to me. I also really like that, even though she’s a royal and a member of the Vermillion family, she doesn’t just focus on her own squad. It was great when she showed up at the Black Bulls hide out and straight up kidnapped them to have them join her training. I’m just in awe of both her physical and mental strength. She was so cool when she went up against all those elves by herself. I’m not caught up with the manga, but I think I saw a spoiler about her recently and I’m very excited to find out more about it. I pretty much wish I was Mereoleona. She is my spirit animal.

Charmy Pappitson

There is a lot to adore about Charmy. First and foremost, she is an adorable badass. I love that her passion for food is something she shares with her allies and friends instead of being something that makes her greedy. I feel like Charmy is underrated because her magic is great for restoring mana, defense and offense. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t she one of the highest ranked knights in the black bulls? I also love how she gets away with a lot of shit just because she’s cute. The episodes where she straight up just hops onto the wizard king’s lap and feeds him snacks without anyone batting an eye get me every time!

Vanessa Enoteca

Sometimes I think about how Vanessa was willing to give up her own freedom just to save Asta’s arms, and how she gave up drinking for a few episodes in order to focus on a way to not only make herself stronger for upcoming battles, but the rest of her teammates as well. I like her dedication to the Black Bulls. Her thread magic is also pretty cool and I like the clever ways she’s learned to use it.

Fuegoleon Vermillion

Poor Fuegoleon is so calm and sensible compared to his siblings. I like that he’s a fair leader that makes sure to consider all angles before passing judgement on someone. He is also a dependable captain and full of great wisdom that aids in character development for important characters like Asta and Noelle. I love how he competes with his sister though, and watching them bicker in the episode where they throw a birthday party for that nun lady was silly.

Asta

How can you not like Asta? He has such a big heart and the best self-discipline out of anyone in the show. He would always rather talk things out before resorting to fighting and likes to understand the motivations behind the actions of his enemies. He is unashamed to be himself and continues to pursue his goals even when other people mock him or put him down. I also like that he is more perceptive of how people think or feel than it would seem sometimes.

Sekke Bronzazza

His personality is pretty much the worst (and I think he actually tried to kill Asta after the magic knight exam… asshole) but the way he always manages to fit “ha-ha” into his speech is so funny to me and always cracks me up. And the way everyone calls him the “ha-ha” guy is very amusing to me, especially when he tries and fails to politely correct them. I also love how he always ends up in the most random situations (in Yami’s bathroom or working for the king).

 Top Ten Black Clover Ships/BroTPs

Finral x Vanessa

I guess I just think back to that fight against the Despair guy from the Third Eye because both Finral and Venessa sort of worked together and pushed past their limits for the first time. I think Venessa is also the one that put the green in Finral’s hair, right? I don’t know. Venessa is good for Finral because he’s so insecure and she’s so supportive of other people. They’re cute together.

Yami x Charlotte

I think everyone ships this? lol Charlotte’s independence and personal strength are important to her, and the fact that Yami acknowledges and respects those traits in her makes them a great match. He also constantly encourages her to show her softer side, saying that it’s okay to lean on other people and ask for help. He could help her find balance and be comfortable in her own skin.

Asta x Mimosa

Mimosa is a much better match for Asta than Noelle because Noelle constantly needs validation and attention that she’s just never going to get from Asta. His brain just doesn’t work that way. Mimosa is content with supporting Asta with her magic as best she can, and doesn’t get jealous or competitive in the way Noelle does. Mimosa is soft and gentle which is a nice contrast to Asta’s loud and rough personality.

Yuno x Charmy

I know this is almost like a crack ship, but I can’t help but like it anyway. Like Asta, Yuno isn’t going to be the type of guy to actively pursue a relationship or be overly affectionate. This doesn’t seem to affect Charmy who seems fine with even the most minimal of interaction haha. I think it’s so cute how much she supports and roots for him when she sees him in a fight. And Yuno doesn’t seem to mind her trying to feed him and take care of him either.

Magna x Luck (brotp)

Lucky’s personality is quirky, chaotic, and frankly just difficult to understand, so I think it’s hard for people to get close to him. He comes on so strong with the pranks and desire to fight, plus he doesn’t really know how to hold back. The fact that Magna can endure all that while also seeing Luck as a person on a deeper level than just being some spazzy boy is really wholesome to me. I think it’s good for Luck to have someone who can respect him that way without asking him to change his behavior. I do not think this would work romantically though. Magna is actually pretty sensitive and emotional, and gets pretty upset when Luck is stronger or does better than him in something. It ultimately just drives Magna to work harder, but I think that sort of competition might be bad news in a romantic relationship if he’s always feeling inferior.

Yami x Jack the Ripper (brotp)

I want their friendship! I really do. The way they go from relaxed and having fun to ready to beat each other’s asses is hilarious. And there’s literally no reason for it, they’re just like unnecessarily competitive and I’m living for it. Whether they’re celebrating at a festival, about to have an important meeting with the wizard king, or in the middle of a huge fight with a major bad guy, it doesn’t matter. They will trash talk each other and probably end up brawling. I love it.

Gauche x Grey

The episodes where Gauche had to fight with Gordon and Grey were really cool because those three are probably the oddest oddballs of the Black Bulls. I don’t know if I ship them romantically or just at friends, but the development of the relationship between Gauche and Grey has been interesting and I wouldn’t mind seeing more. Also, please give Gauche something else to obsess over besides his sister lmao

Mars x Fana

I don’t have any strong feelings for them as characters individually, but I like that they fought so hard to protect each other as kids and how they continued to fight for and protect each other after being reunited.

[cbspams]

Soft (Sentimental) Saturday

@5sosxjieun : You, genuinely, are one of the kindest souls I’ve ever met. Every post you make reminding other they’re loved and that they’re valued is filled with care. Every word you put out into the world is touched with love and presented with enthusiasm I wish I still had. Although you’re on break right now, know that I cherish you.

Some words from Minho: I couldn’t even imagine a world without you in it anymore. Without your voice, screaming or whispering. Without your touch, sweet and gentle. I love you more than the universe loves its creations made of stardust and gold.

@moonlightchn : We stan a creative soul. I am so excited for more of your lore, it is so unbelievably fun to read and learn about. I love how distinct you make your Chan’s, how each of them has their own personality. I love that you’re so determined to have a good time with everyone else, never wavering. I love the way you write. I love the kind of power your words hold

A few words from Felix: I look up to you, as someone I want to reach someday. Your dedication and tireless work doesn’t go unnoticed. Thank you for everything you do for me!

@gamer-yeji : Hello precious adorable one! I’m never going to forget you as one of my first interactions. Your spirit to always look out for your fellow community member is something I admire and adore. I know it’s been a bit rough for you recently but you’re incredible for pulling through and finding your own balance again. Thank you for always checking in.

A few words from Chan: Yeji, you are always so cheerful and you bring a lot of light and joy to my day. I know we keep putting off movie night (because adminnie is bad at proper schedules) but I’m excited for a fun, cozy night together.

@singledad-minho : I. Love. Your. Concept. Can’t get over it. Every post you make is so adorable and even though I don’t personally want kids (right now), I have every urge to want to baby Minjun. You’ve got the doting father down to a tee and it’s such a delight reading what you write. I know I haven’t really interacted with you because I’m shy and bad at things but I do really like seeing you on my dash.

A few words from Jisung: Everything you guys do is so cute! Hey, do you think I could meet Minjun someday? When you’re both comfortable with it! I think we’d get along, maybe as animal buddies.

@vampiremomo : Okay I know it’s been like, 3 days since I’ve gotten to talk to you but you’re amazing? You have a kind of daring energy I love seeing. And you’re so supportive! I see you liking and rbing things from me. Someday I’ll return the favor when I get my shit together. Your concept is so powerful too I’m excited to see more of it!

A few words from Minho: Damn princess, well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes. Having fun with our little game yet?

@modelyonghee : So cute!! It makes me smile when I see notifs of you popping up. I’m looking forward to talking with you more.

A few words from Jisung: Ah Yongyong! Come find me anytime, I’m always here for you! And yes you’re the best at cuddles and you have magic hands hehe

@freerentskz : Don’t think I don’t see you liking all my posts. I’m having a ton of fun with our RP! There’s a really dynamic quality to it where it’s constantly moving the plot forward but also creating really delicate relationships. I’m looking forward to what happens when they leave the church heh

A few words from Minho: I trust you enough not to stab me in the back at least. You’ve gotta a strong spirit, I know we’ll make it work.

@starsirah-oc : Thank you for living in and loving my story. And for always interacting with me! I treasure the talks we have. Sirah’s so fun and your writing is absolutely fantastic! Lowkey feel a little bad about not giving you lengthy replies hajdhd. I’m looking forward to building a world with you!

A few words from Chan: I’ll be waiting

@yourdahyxn : You have a great sense of aesthetic?? Your posts are the prettiest thing and I love seeing them. Plus you put so much fun on my dash and in my dm’s, which is really really appreciate!! I also want to get to know you better someday

A few words from Felix: I’m having lots of fun with you noona! Our pillow fort’s gonna be the best ever!

Honorable mentions:

@yourchaechae : I know it’s been rough for you lately but I’m really proud of you for properly owning up to and apologizing for your mistakes. All your posts are so lighthearted and a greatly needed break from the kind of gloom the community sometimes has. Chae is adorable! I love how you portray her as someone so bubbly and warm. Here’s to having a better future.

@sxltyshima : Eyyy what a journey we’re making! What’s hiding in the shadows mmmm???? I’m so glad you chose to RP with me and I’m super excited for your fic to come out. Let’s have a good time together!

@mafia-chaeyoung : dude you’re so funny ahdkshsj seeing you on my dash never fails to make me laugh

@empress-jiaqi : I know I don’t interact with you much if at all ahdkshdj but you seem like a lot of fun and I’d like to get to know you better. Still not over the fact that you thought I was pre-debut Chaeyoung aaaaahhhhh

@cupcake-yeri : we just started talking but I think you’re a lot of fun! Your concept is really sweet too (pun intended). You can always reach out to me for weirdly extra waxing about things

@camgirl-jihyeon : also haven’t spoken much but you made me laugh really hard at work yesterday and I almost squeaked. Hope I can talk to you more

@shinhaneul-oc : idk what to say about you other than you seem really cool and considerate and I wanna get to know you

My various anons: (Slaps inbox) this bad boy can hold so many fun and interesting questions and interactions. I love and cherish every ask you send.

Thank you for a week and a day of fun! I know I joined at a weird time with reforming the community and all but I’ve really enjoyed my time here. I’m a little shy so I’m working on knowing more people but I really am so happy with everyone I know now. I hope we can keep having really fun and memorable times together 💖

[sophcaro]

Back in Time | WMatsui - Chapter 14

Airi retrieved a glass from the cupboard and placed it next to the napkin and pair of chopsticks on the food stray, stealing a worried glance at Akane who was cooking. At this late time of the day, the house used to be full of life and filled with conversations, but their routine had been abruptly disrupted. These past few days, a heavy atmosphere enveloped each of their evenings. While Shizuru and Natsuki watched television in the living room, their female domestic robot, Alice, prepared dinner with the rigor and dedication she was famous for. In fact, the latter went on with her daily chores as usual and didn’t seem too disturbed by the recent arrangements in the organization of the household.

But not the same could be said for the other occupants of the house. Airi witnessed on a daily basis how Akane was affected by the decline of Rena’s health and mental condition. When was the last time she saw her wife smile or laugh? Airi couldn’t recall. As for their daughter Shizuru, it was a hard task to keep the truth from her. She kept asking questions. To know why Natsuki and Rena were living with them. To know why Jurina hadn’t showed up once since their arrival. Shizuru didn’t understand the situation, but was clever enough to realize her parents were hiding things from her.

Akane turned the burner off and poured the soup in the four bowls on the table, filling at last the bowl on the food tray. As she leaned down to carry the food tray, Airi reacted on instinct and held her arm. “Let me do it tonight.”

They exchanged looks in silence. A mixture of emotions flashed through Akane’s eyes – confusion, surprise. She gave her a weak nod of consent. “It will be alright.” Airi gave her arm a gentle squeeze, wanting to restore hope and confidence in the future. “We will go through this. Together.”

Akane’s eyes locked into hers. “I can’t handle seeing her like this. She’s my best friend. I want to help her any way I can. I just… I don’t know what to do anymore.”

Airi saw her insecurity. Her despair. Her sorrow. “I know.” She leaned over and planted a kiss on her cheek. “Rena is a strong person. Right now, she’s going through a difficult phase, but she will overcome this. I know she will.”

A faint smile played across Akane’s lips. She didn’t add anything after that and Airi knew they wouldn’t speak of the subject anymore.

Airi left the kitchen and climbed the stairs leading to the upper floor, cautious not to spill the content of the food tray. As she approached the guest room, she felt a twinge of anticipation, fearing how her arrival would be received. Following Rena’s discharge from the hospital, Akane had drove her back to her house, but the outcome was a disaster. Rena didn’t have the energy and emotional capacity to take care of herself, breaking down each time her gaze fell upon the single remembrance of her deceased wife in the house. It had only taken Akane and Airi a short discussion to make a decision. That same evening, Akane brought Rena to live with them.

Airi passed the bedroom door, not surprised to find the lights off and the curtains closed. She squinted, letting her eyes get accustomed to the darkness. Her gaze fell upon the bed, undone but empty. Airi moved forward and laid the tray down on the table, switching the bed lamp on. The light slowly brightened until it flooded the room, the walls, the furniture, and the body curled in a corner of the room.

After two weeks, Rena’s physical frailty had reached a preoccupying stage. Rena was dressed in her pajama, her general appearance sloppy, her hair disheveled. Her face was as pale as death, her lips parched and crackled. She had an empty gaze, her eyes swollen and puffy. Despite the food presented to her three times a day, each food tray was returned barely touched. Rena spent all her days secluded in her room, alternating between sleeping and crying when she thought no one heard her.

Airi’s heart sank, still not accustomed to such a terrible vision. This person huddled on the floor, silently hugging her knees close to her chest, didn’t look like her friend. She bore no resemblance with the proud and confident millionaire CEO she had worked aside and known for so many years. Both she and Akane did everything in their power to be of moral support after the tragedy that had struck, but their efforts didn’t seem to pay off and have any positive effect on her.

Airi kneeled in front of her, murmuring. “I brought you dinner.” She received no response and laid a tentative hand on her knee. “Rena?”

The physical contact stirred her up. “Thank you.” Rena stared back at her with a blank look. “But I’m not hungry.”

Airi felt despondent and frustrated by the rejection. “I know, but you have to eat. Akane and I are worried about you. Think about Natsuki. She wouldn’t want to see you like this.”

At the mention of her daughter, Rena’s eyes filled with tears. “You think I’m a bad mother, don’t you?”

“Of course not,” Airi protested, caught off guard. “You are in pain and grieving. We love you, Rena. We will take care of you and Natsuki as long as necessary. But we want to help you go through this. So please. Promise me you’ll eat something?”

Airi feared her plea to be futile. Her friend was avoiding her gaze and didn’t look inclined to comply. Airi hesitated, acknowledging the tricky situation. She didn’t wish to show too much insistence; it would only push her friend to withdraw even further into her shell. She waited and stroke her arm, whispering a few words of comfort. She repeated the process, waiting, hoping to witness the slightest sign of change. She didn’t want to leave the room with another sense of failure.

At last, she caught Rena’s attention. Her lack of enthusiasm was showing, yet Airi’s patience was rewarded with a small, unconvinced nod. It wasn’t much, but enough to elevate her spirit. She helped her get up from the floor and they took the direction of the table. The meal went on in silence. Airi stayed by her side the whole time. Jurina’s absence resonated in every one of them and she couldn’t imagine the pain Rena was going through. However, after tonight, her chest filled with hope at the small step she achieved.

**********

“The prince reached the tower where the kidnapped princess was imprisoned. Without warning, his horse stopped with his head high, ears forward, body rigid. The prince began to soothe the animal with a caress on the neck, but the horse refused to move forward, stamping his feet in displeasure. The prince stared in front of him and reached for his sword, sensing the danger.  Suddenly, a mournful howling sound could be heard. His jaw dropped in shock at the threatening green dragon that appeared in front of him. The prince felt a cold shiver run down his spine. He heard the storytelling of a dark creature invoked by the king, but refused to believe it. Today, he was going to fight his greatest enemy.”

Natsuki gasped and watched, wide-eyed, the dragon projected by the hologram, searching in the darkness for Shizuru’s hand. At the physical contact, Shizuru tilted her head in her direction, reading the terror plastered all over her friend’s face. Alice, her domestic robot, kept on narrating the story, projecting in Shizuru’s bedroom images of the brave prince fighting the dragon with all his might, the special effects coming from the hologram making the fairytale extremely realistic.

“After a fierce battle, the prince planted his sword in the belly of the beast. The earth trembled as the defeated dragon collapsed and expired his last breath. The prince, exhausted and severely injured, dragged his feet forward and marched ahead. He arrived at the bottom of the tower, his progress coming to a halt when a field of thorns developed and grew by magic, preventing him from accessing the front door. The prince’s bloodied arm trembled and he raised his eyes to heaven, devastated by the new obstacle. Was fate against him? When would his misery come to an end?”

“No!” Natsuki let out a frustrated scream. “Why can’t the prince be reunited with the princess already? Why??”

“I-I’m sure he will,” Shizuru said, taken aback by her outburst. “Let’s listen to the rest of the story and see what happens nex-”

“No! I don’t want to! Enough! Enough!”

Shizuru stared at her, complete surprise on her face. Her friend rose from the bed, agitated, refusing to spare another look at the hologram. Shizuru went silent, not knowing what to say next. Deep concern washed over her. Natsuki was on the verge of tears. “Alice…” She forced a smile and addressed hesitantly the robot who had paused the story. “Could you please… leave us alone?”

“Yes, Miss Shizuru,” the female robot said with a slight bob of her head. “Don’t hesitate to call me if you need anything.”

Shizuru followed her robot’s retreating form as she left the bedroom and redirected her attention to Natsuki. Since she began living with them, she hadn’t been the same. Shizuru had questioned her parents about it, wishing to know what was happening, but all she managed to learn was that she and her mother would be staying with them for a little while. Under other circumstances, she would have been overjoyed by the news. She loved spending time with her best friend. Nothing made her happier in the world. But everything had changed two weeks ago.

During their conversations, Natsuki almost never smiled. Every interaction with Alice, the family’s domestic robot, darkened her mood even more. Shizuru knew how affected Natsuki was by Alfred’s terrible fate. She didn’t understand either herself how come he had stopped functioning. But it wasn’t the only absence in her life that caused her friend so much pain. During family meals at 4, Shizuru didn’t miss the dejected look Natsuki would give the two empty chairs.

Shizuru gave a small tug at Natsuki’s hand. She was relieved when she didn’t reject her and came to sit by her side on the bed. In the past, Shizuru adored teasing and showering her friend with gestures of affection. A kiss on the cheek or a spontaneous embrace, often received by her shy friend with an embarrassed blush. However, this evening, when Shizuru laced their fingers together, her only objective was to bring her comfort. She suddenly had a flash of intuition. “Why don’t you go and see your mommy?”

Natsuki glanced up at her, startled. “But… Auntie Akane and Auntie Airi said I can’t.”

Shizuru tried to remain calm and think rationally, but her frustration at the situation bubbled under the surface. “I know and I think it’s silly. She’s your mommy! It makes no sense! You want to see her, no?”

She got a timid nod in reply.

Shizuru’s eyes twinkled. “Let’s go!” She stood on her feet and pulled on Natsuki’s hand. “Follow me. I know where her bedroom is.”

A flicker of hope brightened Natsuki’s bleak expression. “I-It would be disobeying. What if your parents get upset with me?”

“Who’s going to tell them? I won’t,” Shizuru said confidently and kissed her gently on the cheek. “I promise. It will be our little secret.”

 **********

Rena tossed and turned in her bed for the umpteenth time. Would tonight be another night of torture? She hated the nights when she couldn’t sleep, her brain filled with memories of Jurina and her tragic death. Rena stared up at the ceiling. What time was it? It was hard to tell. She vaguely remembered Airi’s visit and taking a bite of the dinner she brought, the food feeling tasteless and bland on her tongue. She lost all appetite a long time ago. Rena was aware of the sleeping pill on the bedside table, ready to put her out of her misery. The temptation was high.

Sleep all day and forget? Or stay awake and have her days and nights filled with visions of the one she lost? The thought brought a lump to her throat and her eyes moistened. Her everyday life had never been the same since she crossed path with Jurina. She brought her a joy and sense of fulfillment her job never managed to accomplish. How could she go on with her life without her by her side?

All these years, she had become so dependent on her love, support and presence. Her heart wasn’t only broken into pieces. When she discovered Jurina’s lifeless body at the morgue, she also lost a part of herself. She felt paralyzed all day, detached from everything around her. Her emotions seemed to have disappeared; she felt physically and mentally drained. She was empty, like a cold shell, vacant.

At the sound of a small knock on the door, she hurriedly brushed away a lonely tear. Tears came so frequently and effortlessly. She prayed they would stop falling for once. She hated offering such a pitiful state of herself to her friends. Rena sat up in bed, frowning as she checked out the alarm-clock. A little over 10 p.m. Dinner had already been served. Had she been crying too much?

Air caught in her lungs when the person she expected the least appeared. Natsuki, her 5-year-old daughter, was standing on the doorstep. Rena grew rigid. She turned pale and clutched the bedcover. Shock. Disbelief. Fear. She had an agreement with Airi and Akane. She made them promise to not let Natsuki enter her bedroom under any circumstance. So what was her daughter doing here?

Rena followed her progress inside the room. Don’t come closer! she wanted to scream. She needed to stop her. She couldn’t witness her mother in such a bad condition. So why weren’t the words coming out? Natsuki paused once. And twice. She hesitated. She was afraid of being scolded. Rena could see it written all over her face. That’s when Rena realized she couldn’t prevent this reunion from happening. Of course, Natsuki missed her. She missed seeing her as much as she did. Tears sprang to Rena’s eyes and slid down her cheeks. When did she last lay eyes on her daughter? Days? Weeks? Her brain failed to come up with a single response. She lost all notion of time.

Natsuki came to stand beside her bed and, slowly, step after step, climbed onto the bed until they faced each other. Rena couldn’t breathe, let alone speak with the knot forming in her throat.

Natsuki’s fingers lightly touched her cheek. “Mommy is sad too...”

Rena shivered. “Y-Yes, mommy is sad.” She tried putting on a brave face to appear in control, but the sound of her voice breaking betrayed her true emotions. “Mommy… is not feeling well.”

“It’s because mama is not here?”

Rena could only nod by the affirmative.

“Where is mama? Why don’t you tell her to come back?”

Rena felt tears rising again but battled them back. She reduced the distance and wrapped her arms around Natsuki, pulling her close. “Honey…” Rena said hoarsely. “Mama… Mama is not coming back.”

“Why?” Natsuki leaned back, looking straight into her eyes. “I want to see mama… Where is she? Tell her to come home. Please. Please!”

Rena heard Natsuki’s intake of breath as a sob caught in her throat and saw tears streak down her cheeks. She embraced her in a tight hold, feeling her stomach churn at her daughter’s heartbreaking distress. It tore her heart to hear her cry. She needed to tell her the truth, but it was beyond her capacity. She couldn’t find the strength to utter the words out loud. “I know you love your mama. I love her too. But she’s not… She’s not coming back. It’s just the two of us now.”

“No!” Natsuki tore herself away from the embrace. “She promised we would always be together! What did you do?! It’s your fault! I hate you!”

Natsuki’s face had hardened; her eyes burned with anger and resentment. Rena didn’t have time to reply. Without another glance, Natsuki jumped off the bed and stormed out of the room.

Rena was left shocked and shattered.

Her heart clenched with pain, but she didn’t hold it against her for her harsh words. She was the only one to blame; she had handled the situation in such a terrible way. Rena felt more powerless and desperate than ever, before coming to the realization that it was probably for the best. Maybe she should let Natsuki believe she was the reason why Jurina left. How could she bring herself to tell her daughter that her dear mama - the one she admired, praised and loved more than anyone in this world - had died in a cruel car accident? Rena’s own sanity was already hanging by the thinnest of threads. The idea of destroying her daughter’s fragile innocence with the truth was too unbearable to consider.

[sleepymouses]

tagged by @littlepetbee, thank uuuu <3 i spent way too long thinking about htis lol,

Rules: pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions, tag a bunch o ppls to do it too (if y’all want to, supes no pressure or anything!)

Natsume yuujinchou  (a teenage orphan who sees spirits/monsters sets out to free the spirits who were bound in magical contract by his grandmother after he inherits a powerful book, aided primarily by a spirit who appears as an exasperated fat cat (who is just as fun as he sounds). Titular character is like my Fave boy in the whole world, he’s so kind and soft despite all the hardships he’s faced, the series has very gentle pacing/character development, and each episode is a carefully crafted lil story that have often moved me to tears, chuckles, or outright chinhands of fondness as u watch natsume slowly find a home in the world and amongst the humans &spirits around him. big focus on friendships, there’s like no romance with any of the main characters, lots of cool different creatures (most of whom arent all that scary once u get to know them), its just literally everything i could ever dream for in a show and it exists! <3)

Leverage (team of modern day robin hoods ruin rich peoples’ lives via  delightfully crafted spy cons to give back to the regular folks the rich people hurt. Extremely good, strong found family vibes, and v cathartic)

Brooklyn 99 (follows diverse cast of character who make up a NY precinct. Hilarious, immensely wholesome & groundbreaking, & probs the most lighthearted crime show besides like psych tbh)

Blackspot/Zone Blanche (spoopy french/belgium crime series set in a small village way out in the mountains surrounded by misty, mysterious and murdery woods. eerie and atmospheric, but also like one of my fave characters (everyone calls him teddy bear) keeps a pet guinea pig at work, so it’s not entirely grim and bleak)

Longmire (a modern western crime drama centering around the titular sheriff and others in their small town wyoming county, well written and lot of chracter development revealed alongside some really good case mysteries bc i love trying to figure out whodunits apparently based on a book series well adored by dads btw)

who is your favorite character in 2? (leverage) ahhh,,, this is hard... Eliot maybe? like Hardison is baby ofc, but i relate to elliot a ton (i think if i was on a team i would want to be the hitter tbh?) and love the subversion of so many action hero tropes that he is, also endlessly amused by how very put upon he is despite all his rad/random skills

who is your least favorite character in 1? (natsume yuujinchou) oh seiji matoba for sure, he can go eat a mouldy tree stump. absolutely evil nasty dude

what is your favorite episode of 4? (blackspot) the end of the road. great opening, didnt end up too devastating unlike a lot of the cases, Hermann was gr8, cool twist i hadnt super expected in the plot which was neat.

what is your favorite season of 5? (longmire) probs 1, walter reeally started to piss me off being Such A Man in later seasons, also me being extremely anxious about Henry and his life choices later, that creepy stalker storyline starting up with Someone and when Someone else in the main cast got died really suddenly and upsettingly later on as well, also when a weird relationship started between some of the characters that i really aint feeling so. before all that happened was nice (also sorry if this is super vague, im trying to avoid spoilers)

who is your favorite couple in 3? (B99) Besides Jake/Amy and Holt/Kevin (bc oviously theyre gr8) uh.. i know it was a long time ago and didnt last very long, but i thought rosa and marcus were really sweet? it brought another layer out to her character, even when they broke up that helped rosa starting to show emotional vulnerability and all, even tho it ended it was still just, idk, i liked them.

who is your favorite couple in 2? (leverage) Does trio count, cos Parker/Eliot/Harding 4 life yo

what is your favorite episode of 1? (natsume yujinchou) i have sooo many faves ahhh!!! i dont think i could pick just one on pain of death, every episode is acrefully cosntructed gem all on its own and i have too many that i love and adore to pick jsut one :((

what is your favorite episode of 5? (longmire) Dog soldier!! ive rewatched that one a ton, so so many good bits, really satisfying resolution of the case despite the shitty system that was revealed, and i rmr getting chills by the end the first time i saw it.

what is your favorite season of 2? (leverage) i guess season 1? just, idk, everything being set up and watching all these grumpies/less grumpies who have no plans to stay together start working together as a baby team, and just the joy of seeing their first heist together with the first plot twist, just.. such a delight, but all seasons that ive seen so far were all excellent, it’s a stellar show

how long have you watched 1? (natsume yujinchou) oh idk exactly, like years and years man... defs the longest out of all on this list

how did you become interested in 3? (b99) i think it was just on netflix way back in season 1 and i started watching it, loved it and never stopped? i think that might have even been before it got rlly popular lol

who is your favorite actor in 4? (blackspot) i dont rlly know any of these french peeps? but teddybear’s one of my fave characters, so hopefully the person who plays him is also cool, in which case hubert delattre (if not, Suliane Brahim does a v good job as the lead)

which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5? (natsume yujinchou, leverage or longmire) um... real torn between natsume and leverage here, they’re both such lovely gems that do found family so, so well.. leverage is a team of modern robin hood-esque spies with brilliant writing and exciting heists and multiple delightful plot twists every episode and great character building and so much catharticism in ruining evil rich peoples lives.

but natsume’s title character is one of my very favorite characters ever, hes been through so much but he becomes the most kindest and thoughtful boy ever, and its so, so soft and gentle in its development of characters and their slow build of getting to know each other and becoming friends, and the interactions with the paranormal world are very rarely entirely malicious/scary, and there’s pretty well no romance, at least like no romance for plot/with the main characters anyways, and there’s lots of female characters who have important roles but arent sexualized/killed off for man feels/exist for romo (which sadly cannot be said about a lot of media, especially manga/anime tbh, even leverage does not win entirely on that front).. its defintiely my favorite anime ever (i dont watch loads, but literally no other one can ever come close to topping its perfection),

i guess tho, leverage is over, and natsume is still technically ongoing, so i guess for that then i have to go with natsume?

which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3? (natsume yuujinchou or b99) Natsume for sure, they’re so short its easy to power thru like half a season in an afternoon

if you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? (blackspot) i would probably want to be someone who didnt live in villefranche actually haha uh, it’s a pretty spoopity place.. even some of the characters i do like make some Bad decisions that are v bothersome. Dr. Leila barami seems to have a good head on her shoulders tho, so if i Must be a character here then let’s go with her

would a crossover between 3 and 4 work? (b99 or blackspot) oh god... the cheery upbeat department at the 99 meet up with a grim, misty tiny mountain forest village with bleak day to day life, solving crimes amidst small town paranoia and weird maybe cult-related conspiracies and honestbhly something/s paranormal and menacing going on in the woods?? i just... cant see any of the characters even interacting lol, im just picturing jake’s confused befuddled face when he hears something weird but like x 10000

pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple? (natsume yujinchou) hm... i mean, one of the things i love about Natsume is that there arent really any romo relationships tbh? at least not with any of the main characters in the main storyline (so far), just like the odd one-off of minor characters (and takashi’s adopted parents ofc, but that’s different). so, yeah, i cant really think of one (although i think the big fandom fave ship of takashi and his worst enemy is rlly.. nope, and i dont know what’s going on there? takashi and tanama however, that would make sense, tho it is not unlikely so i cant answer this question with them)

overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5? (b99 or longmire) b99! cos ya know my annoyances with some of the stuff happening later on in longmire lol, b99 just got better n better as it went along, and it’s still going :’)

which has the better theme music, 2 or 4? (leverage or blackspot) blackspot has a real good eerie atmospheric theme which is gr8 and i love it <3 (leverage’s tune is like, elevator music/cheesy jazzy spy tune, which does suit it tho lol)

and idk, anyone bored and stuck at home who wants to do this? no pressure if ur like nah but if u wanna go ahead.... @creepy-friend-of-darkness @anna-wa @rhinky-thingz @rexbasileus @aeolian-harp @warrenkoles @softbrobarnes @damnitttana @cluelesswolf @moondoggiestyle @blloodorangeisthenewblack @my-nail-beds-suck @frankiecolours @savvylikeyeahhh @lake-effectkidx @justhugharry @casualmisandry @j4ya @galaxygalpals @thesecondwarm @dealwright @knipperdollin @curlycombover @kaspbrakeddie (and if i didnt tag u and u still wanna do this, consider yeself tagged)

[ilovemygaydad]

title: grown

summary: I am the spirit of the small brooke in the woods.

pairings: moxiety (pre-romantic to romantic), toxic anxceit

warnings: first person pov, abusive relationship, deceit is an abuser, religion, homophobia, mild anti-semitism, angst with a happy ending, implied depression, crying, kissing, anxiety, mentions of a prosthetic, sadness, catholic stereotypes (?), possibly something else

a/n: the second part of a series that i’m going to write as a writing exercise!

you - ao3 link

I am the spirit of the small brooke in the woods. I don’t know my age--time is an odd concept that I’ve never been able to master--but I would say that I’m neither old nor young. I am neither powerful nor mundane. I just am.

However, in all of my time on this earth, I had never been so fascinated by humans until the two of you showed up. You were young. You had small faces and hands and high-pitched voices, which I found truly adorable. The happy one always had so much energy, running forward and back toward the quiet one, who was much slower than he was. I’ve since figured out that it was due to the odd, metal bar that he had instead of part of his leg. 

You two would always hold hands and smile at each other with those innocent faces and missing teeth (you wouldn’t believe how shocked that I was the first time I found out humans lost teeth as humans). The happy one giggled loudly as he splashed in my water, and the quiet one would gently tell him to be quiet, but in the caring way that his voice always tended.

There were many times that you would visit my brooke as you grew; however, there was one day that changed things for a long while. I believe that you were sixteen years old, and you had been visiting the brooke for around seven years. The happy one had mellowed into a lovely young man, and, sadly, the quiet one had become anxious and scared. On that day, the quiet one was even more anxious than usual; the smell of his fear overpowered nearly all of the happy one’s emotions. You sat on your usual rocks, and a silence fell over you. I remember the conversation that followed so vividly...

“Patton,” the quiet one said, folding the sleeves of his large hoodie over his hands. “I have something to tell you.”

“Aw, Virge, you know that you can tell me anything! There’s no need to be nervous.”

The quiet one waved his hands around in a vague, wild motion. “I know. I know. It’s just... I like you.”

“I like you, too! What is it that you needed to say?” The happy one tilted his head, and I watched as the quiet one stiffened.

“No, Pat, I like you. As in, I have a crush on you.”

Realization dawned on the happy one’s face, and he frowned. “You can’t have a crush on me. Boys aren’t allowed to like boys. That’s what the priest at my church said. ‘Being gay is one of the worst sins.’”

There was a pause--one that most likely felt much longer for me as I watched the tiny bit of light left in the quiet one’s eyes die out--before the quiet one spoke again. “You’re right. Of course. I wasn’t thinking correctly.”

“Y’know,” the happy one said, perking back up. “Maybe you could come by my church on Sunday, and we can get all of your feelings corrected! It would be fun.”

“I can’t. I have temple, remember?”

“Can’t you just skip it? It’s not like it’s important.”

I could almost feel your friendship die as the quiet one said. “I’ll ask my mom tonight... I’ve got to be going for dinner.”

You exchanged good byes and went your separate ways, and it was a long time before I saw you together again. The happy one only came by occasionally; he would throw stones into the brooke and talk about his day before going back, but the quiet one... you came back often. After a short while, you began to bring the liar with you. I didn’t like him from the moment that he stepped foot into the forest. His words were too heavy and too loaded to be true, but you couldn’t see past his pretty face. And you were angry. Your best friend had betrayed you, and you wanted to prove him wrong with this new boy. The liar. 

I was forced to watch as the liar took advantage of your anxious nature time and time again. It pained me to see love become so tainted and spoiled. When I thought that you couldn’t get any lower, you fell even deeper. I wanted to reach out and stop you so badly...

Then, a while later--far too long, in my opinion--you came sprinting to my brooke, tripping over your false leg and sobbing. You nearly pitched forward into the ground as you came to a sudden stop at the side of the brooke, but I was able to coax the wind into righting you just in time. You fell to your knees, and I sent the water up to lap at your knees in the only comfort I could offer. I knew that the liar had hurt you in some unimaginable way.

And then the happy one came strolling into the forest. He found you crying, and he was at your side in an instant. He comforted you, and in that moment, there were no longer two singular “you”s sitting in front of me; you became one plural “you” once more. Isn’t English interesting? How you can have two singulars and one plural? Your human languages are so odd, but I digress.

You were a whole pair once again, and I was so relieved. When the quiet one’s sobs died down, it was the happy one’s time to cry. He begged forgiveness for his actions, and it was no surprise that forgiveness was given. You hugged and caught up on the past year and a half (I am loath to believe that the liar had been around for that long) and discussed your plans for after high school.

Your visits slowed down after that, and eventually they stopped altogether. I suspect that it was due to “college,” but it hurt nonetheless. I missed hearing your voices and seeing your gentle interactions. It was lonely for a long while, but I was lucky enough to have the company of the trees and animals.

When you returned, you looked much more grown up. The happy one had grown even taller, almost towering over the quiet one, who had cut his hair a bit shorter and found a signature style in purple and black. You also brought along another person, whom I dubbed “the nerd.” I mean, he wore a tie into the forest. If that doesn’t scream “nerd” to you, I don’t know what will!

But the thing that I noticed most out of everything was your hands. They were clasped together. Finally. I had almost given up hope that you two would fall in love. 

I think that the best part of that day was when I realized your intentions. If I were able to cry, I definitely would have as you said your vows, and again when you shared your first kiss as husbands. The nerd pretended that he was disgusted by your affection, but I saw the soft smiles that he forced down. He cares a lot for you. He’s a good friend, even if he is someone who wears a tie in a forest.

Now, I watch as you visit with your children, and I’m happy for you. I’m glad you’re together. Love always prevails, even if it endures some hardships along the way.

[mautadite]

january book round up

27 books this month! the most i’ve read in a month in quite some time, and a good start to the year. a couple days late because i’ve been feeling a bit meh. i doubt i’ll be able to read this much at any point this year. but it’s nice to get a good strong head-start on my yearly goal. a mix of audiobooks and e-books so far.

a land so wild - elyssa warkentin ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a really lovely epistolary/found media m/m romance story, set during the 1840s, about a ship captain and a naturalist trying to chart a northwest passage in the arctic, and find a ship that was lost five years ago trying to do the same thing. very beautifully told, with lots of emotion that you’d think would be lost because of the mode of storytelling.

how to bang a billionaire - alexis hall ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a re-read. i remember being very sceptical of this when i first read it, but now that i’ve finished the entire series there’s so much i appreciate about it.

trade me - courtney milan ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ my first courtney milan book, after hearing a lot of good things about her. the hype was deserved! i like her writing a lot and this book (a romance between a poor chinese-am daughter of immigrants, and a billionaire heir with an eating disorder) touched on a lot of stuff that you don’t typically see in romance novels. particular what it mean and what it feels like to be poor. this was probably my favourite treatment of billionaires in a novel (at least, ones where they don’t get beheaded).

hold me - courtney milan ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ the second in the series, equally enjoyable. the hero of this novel has to confront and own up to his sexism in ways that a lot of romance novels would simply let men get away with! if i’d known that that’s part of what the book covered i might not have been enthused to read it, because while i genuinely believe bigoted people can change for the better, i’m not super interested in reading about it. but i really enjoyed how milan wrote it, and the romance was lovely. (also the heroine is trans, nice.)

my lady’s lover - nicola davidson ⭐️⭐️⭐️ not a lot of substance, but it’s historical lesbian romance, which is my eternal catnip. a lady’s maid who’s the member of a society for sexual freedom falls in love with her mistress, and happily discovers that the feelings are returned. there’s sex, some angst, and a happy ending,

a lady’s desire - lily maxton ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ another historical f/f romance. pretty low stakes, without much external conflict, but it had good writing and great characters, and i’ll always have a soft spot for childhood friends to lovers. and let’s be real: i mostly picked this up because of the cover. a woman with her head in another lady’s lap, gazing gayly at her? yes, thanks.

rebound remedy - christine d’abo ⭐️⭐️ eh! m/m holiday romance, about a guy who gets dumped before christmas, has a whirlwind rebound romance with his bartender, and then starts falling deeper for him. nothing bad about it, but i just wasn’t feeling the romance. i’ve read shorter stories that had more chemistry and character interaction.

don’t let go - cynthia dane ⭐️ another f/f romance that i got mostly because of the cover, but this one let me down hard. i liked that it was set in taiwan; had a lot of cultural nuance and tidbits that i enjoyed, but everything else, the writing, the editing, and characters, the chemistry... it was a bust. it also had a weird and baffling approach to mental illness, and managed to be yet another book that makes me hate rich people. also... the two authors credited are the pseudonyms of the same person skfjhdfkj ihni why she’s crediting herself twice.

alone - e.j. noyes ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ LOVED THIS. f/f mystery/thriller-ish romance, though the mystery aspect is admittedly light. noyes has lovely prose and a good sense of storytelling, but the romance is where this really shone for me. which... idk, i’m aware that it might not be for others who read this book. but something about the way olivia fell so helplessly in love with celeste, everything celeste does to hold on to olivia... it appealed to me on a visceral level.

boystown book 1 - marshall thornton ⭐️⭐️⭐️ three short stories about a gay private eye solving mysteries in the community in the early 1980s. it reminded me of how much i love short form mysteries; there’s just something about stories being told that way that i can’t resist. i was also kind of charmed by the way our main character tripped into bed with a cute twink like every 10 pages. :3

poems i sleep next to - shelby eileen ⭐️⭐️⭐️ a collection of contemporary poems. really enjoyable. nothing wowed me, but several poems moved me.

how to talk to nice english girls - gretchen evans ⭐️⭐️⭐️ early 20th century f/f romance between a spirited american heiress and a nice proper english girl. low stakes, character driven. not really character driven enough actually; i felt like they didn’t get to spend enough time knowing each other. and some more external conflict wouldn’t have hurt. but it was hot and fun and well-written.

by his rules - j.a. rock ⭐️⭐️⭐️ an m/m romance that looks at abuse in bdsm communities, and spends a good long time on recovery, survival, and healthy relationships that involve kink. i really could not get into the discipline stuff, but i really liked that the main characters worked for their HEA; nothing clicked magically into placed for them, and aiden was given space and resources to work out his trauma.

the wolf and the girl - aster glenn gray ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a retelling of little red riding hood set in early 20th century russia and france that focuses on the friendship between two young women. simple story, very beautifully told.

the secret diaries of anne lister - anne lister ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ i started reading this in the middle of last year, after i finished gentleman jack, and i was basically reading snippets at a time until december, and then by january i was eating it all up. i LOVED this. i loved the diary of this at times manipulative, haughty, but kind-hearted and tender and clever woman, and all of her loves and struggles and observations. there’s just something... very good about knowing and seeing that lesbians have always existed, and hearing her first hand accounts is just... GREAT. really looking forward to the next volume.

oh, earthman! - berlynn wohl ⭐️⭐️⭐️ an anthology of short stories. weird, fun, scifi-flavoured m/m erotica.

emma - jane austen ⭐️⭐️⭐️ took me long enough, i know! but i really really thoroughly enjoyed my time with this book, especially the audiobook, whose narrator i loved. i loved emma: her cleverness and wit and finesse and all her terrible blunders. though i could tell where the story was going, the getting there was really fun, and i super duper enjoyed the romance (though at one point i got seriously squicked out haha). and fight me: i adored miss bates, i thought she was the best character in the book. LOVE a spinster who don’t know when to shut her trap but is earnest and kind and gentle-hearted and GOOD.

«légendaire.» - kai ashante wilson ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ kaw, i’m begging you, PLEASE write another fell length novel. or novella. please! i love his writing and world-building so so so much, i flip out thinking about it. until he does, these short stories will have to suffice. this was great: everything i love about his writing, revisiting the world and concepts that we’ve seen in his other books, with mesmerising characters and a tragic, but soulful tale.

a conspiracy of truths - alexandra rowland ⭐️⭐️⭐️ i love stories about stories, and as far as that goes, this a pretty good one! the one way it failed to grasp me was on the character front; i just didn’t enjoy the main character as much as i could, or as much as i was meant to, and i felt at times he was too far removed from the plot. basically, chant is a master storyteller travelling in a foreign land, when he’s falsely accused of witchcraft and spying. the novel details how he uses storytelling to get himself out of the pickle, and all the consequences that follow. there are some amazing side characters in this (esp. his apprentice, who i will definitely read the nest book for).

animal farm - george orwell ⭐️⭐️⭐️ felt like rereading this, so i did. and i mean, it’s animal farm! it holds up.

the overdue life of any byler - kelly harms ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ like i said above, i like books about books, and i got this thinking it would be something like that? but it’s more about a single mother who gets the chance to take some time off from her kids and her life, have fun, find romance, and how she deals with managing that, and the guilt, and all the elements that are introduced/reintroduced to her life. i don’t think this is an amazing book, but it’s a lovely one, and i know there are middle aged mothers out there who would benefit from reading it. it’s not about romance (though there’s a cute romance in it); it’s about motherhood and being there for yourself as much as your kids.

the subs club 1&2 - j.a. rock ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ the first two books in an m/m romance series. a group of friends is still reeling after one of them dies at the hands of an irresponsible dom. they decide to form the subs club; a website to review and rate doms, with an eye towards making the community safer for subs, though it doesn’t really work out that way. the first book follows dave, who ends up getting involved with a guy who’s eerily like ron swanson from parks and rec, and the second follows miles, a masochist who gets involved with a guy who likes to pretend to be a vampire (lmao??). i have to tip my hat to j.a. rock, who seems to have a knack for getting me to read things i’d be otherwise sure i wouldn’t be interested in. and i mean, even after reading, i’m pretty sure i don’t want to read other books about domestic discipline or s&m or pretend draculas, but her characters and plots are well written and engaging and i had a really good time. although, i have to mention: the second book dealt with internalised racism in a way that... while well meaning, was definitely not very deftly done.

alice & jean - lily hammond ⭐️⭐️⭐️ post wwii f/f romance set in new zealand. a young widowed mother falls for the dashing woman who delivers her milk every morning. they have to contend with community scrutiny, an old friend of alice’s husband, and her bitter old mother to fight their way to happiness. i enjoyed it; it was simple and the romance was incredibly sweet, though the writing did drag at times.

american dreamer - adriana herrera ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ DELIGHTFUL. the very definition of feel good romance! a young dominican-american man moves to the outskirts of new york to start his food truck, and almost immediately meets a cute librarian who turns his head. i flipping love queer romances with characters from the caribbean; it just feels so good when slang is part of the language of love.

minotaur - j.a. rock ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ i read four books by this author this month, and this is hands down my favourite. i don’t know man, combine girls and monsters and lesbian romance and i”M THERE. thera is a teen orphan sent to a home for girls at the edge of town. there, she makes friends, raises hell, falls in love with the mysterious new girl, and also becomes obsessed with stories of the minotaur, half woman half monster, locked the labyrinth in a cliff not far away. this story appealed to me in so many ways, and i really hope the author writes more f/f in the future.

two dads and three girls - nick (yu) he ⭐️⭐️⭐️ the autobiography of a gay man growing up in china, and the story of how he finds himself, finds love, and becomes a father. very sweet.

whew. that took me a while lol. that’s it for january. i probably (hopefully) will be too busy to read as much this month, but i have some interesting books on my plate. currently listening to an audiobook of beneath a scarlet sky, which is unfortunately underwhelming, and i’ll probably move on with some fun YA.

[angelsarts]

I wanna know more about your Death and Life AU OCs and BNHA OC!

Death and Life AU:

Ezekiel - 

He/Him || Virgo || 27 || Pansexual

Ezekiel is a higher up arch angel who is in charge of the Japanese district of heaven. He personally takes part in training new angels into carrying out their duties to protect and guide the living on a pure life and to avoid letting them into the hands of hell. Ezekiel is a proud and determined man with a usual sexy smirk and a kimono undone to see his chest however when it comes to training the newbies of heaven he always ends up drawing the short straws and getting the people who never gets the hang of it or messing around. That's why 80% of the training involves him face palming or dramatically sighing in resignation. So you could say he's the hot dad that has given up on his children-

Ezekiel had died early in his 20's due to an accident. The "royalty" of Japan at the time were holding an open event for the public to visit, it was mainly for socialising and making connections. He had attended mainly for the free food, but during an interaction with a member of royalty an unstable chandelier snapped and fell from the ceiling. Ezekiel had enough time to push the person he was conversing with out the way but not quick enough for him to avoid getting hit. The man was crushed and sent to heaven as a result for saving a life.

Nolan -

Half demon | Unknown age | 5"7

Nolan was born as a half breed, his mother had a romance with a high ranking demon that resulted in an unwanted pregnancy. His father wanted nothing to do with it, demanded she were to get rid of Nolan or he would do it for her, if it wasn't for his mother fleeing from her country and learning to make charms to keep the father away then chances are he wouldn't be around. Unfortunately his kind is very rarely accepted by neither humans or demons, perhaps that's why he became the edgy angry man he is today but despite this he cherished the love that his mother had given him and the friendship that Emmie-Lou, a fellow demon offered. Emmie Lou understood Nolan's feelings for she was a succubus that left her legacy behind to live with a human whom also accepted Nolan as a friend, because of this after his mothers passing he wasn't alone and for that he is grateful. If anything, Nolan likes the human world much more than that of the demons realm which he happened to visit out of curiosity about who his father was, let us just say he regretted his choice and received those scars on his face.

Shin -

Shrine spirit | Pan | 300+ 

Shin has been a shrine spirit since he could remember , at first he never took his job particularly seriously and more than often played pranks on those who say prayers but leave no offerings. He still plays pranks but 300 or so years later? He's become more mature. The shrine woman he had been so fond of had passed away and so until someone takes up her role, it was up to him to write down each prayer made, to make talismans and clean the shrine to it's best standards on top of guarding it from evil. Now he has what people would call the qualities of a man, and he takes each prayer to heart trying to help those who make them in any way that he can manage. It warms his heart particularly to see that even in modern ages people still come to the shrine even if it isn't in masses anymore. He's a curious being though, wondering what's beyond the shrine, what he has missed over the hundreds of years. It's not all bad though, he often shows himself to those who visit and bring offerings regularly as well as children, the affection that they show him and their thankful attitude more than makes up for being alone at other times not to mention he loves to watch the snow fall. Making snowmen was one of the first thing he and the shrine lady had done together when he arrived and so he makes it a tradition to make one each winter. When the days are quiet and the visitors are low he makes the extra charms to leave outside as well taking well earned naps.

Rigger -

Male | Taurus | 36 | Bisexual Rigger was a French Plague doctor who died in his 30's due to being struck around the head down an alley, reasons to why he was hit was unknown. However Rigger didn't completely die, his good services had been rewarded, a reaper offered his life to be immortal on the condition that instead of saving lives he were to take them - only when their time had come of course. As a result of coming back to life, Riggers left eye became blind, the scars across his face a mark of his contract to become a living reaper. Rigger took this offer, being bought back to life to live and breath as a 39 year old forever. He takes his job seriously, taking down sinners with no mercy, being kind and delicate with children too ill to carry on living, careful and gentle with the elderly. Each person he treats how they should be, although he has got stuck in cases where the elderly with poor sight mistake him for their grandchild, he once was mistaken by an elderly lady and he hadn't had the heart to tell her no - spent over a year pretending to be 'Tommy' the sweet boy who hold her ball of wool while she knits and shows off ugly sweaters to the rest of the oldies at the care home. It took another reaper to take her soul. Rigger is generally very grumpy to normal people, although when he's grumpy the man is still kind and gentle. He secretly adores flowers, children and doesn't actually mind wearing ugly sweaters or hanging out with the elderly, he likes their stories and the sweet attitudes they have. The elderly and flowers are probably the only ones who have seen him look happy instead of the plain old grumpy guy face.

BNHA AU:

Elissa - 

Female - Bisexual - 19

Licensed hero - Quirk: environment/material manipulation

Lady manipulation or rather Elissa is a licensed hero that graduated from UA High, her quirk is the ability to manipulate the environment and material around her whether she makes something grow larger or change shape and form. The marks on her arms to neck glow whenever she activates her quirk. She can make the ground move, and turn it into an arch or even a sculpture, she can make anything into weapons or protection. However the larger the manipulation the shorter the time she can keep control over it. Once her time runs out it can take 10 - 30 minutes before she can use the same material or environment again . She works under a not particularly well known hero agency with a partner known as animorph, a man with the quirk that lets him turn into animals though he often favours the wolf. She's a rising hero in the world and she actually see's Aizawa as her hero/inspiration.

After a particular fight with a villain that she once knew as a friend, her entire image soon changed due to the villain's confrontational words getting into her mind. Now she keeps her hair short and changed her uniform and her hero name. Elissa tries her best to cut the ties with the villain particularly when they had once captured her heart in the past and though it is a struggle, Animorph is always there to help and support. The woman is a very happy person that no matter what happens always wears a smile and insists that no matter how bad things are she's always hopeful and grateful for what she has. Of course she's insecure about her looks or that she'll never do a good enough job to inspire kids she'll still put all her effort in, when she's not on duty she likes to try different ethnic foods, read manga or show off her art to her pet chicken Diego. She also has a long term affection for Bakugou, not that she would ever dare act on such a thing without reciprocation, for now she enjoys their explosive arguments.

I wrote heck loads ;; I apologise if it’s too much information!

[echodrops]

Can we still send ships? Midotsuyu, Kiribaku, Kataang, Zutara, JoxLaurie (don’t know the ship name, little women)

Whoa, there are a lot here, so I’ll just write a little about each one.

MidoTsuyu:

vomit / don’t ship / okay / cute / adorable / perfect / beyond flawless / hot damn / screaming and crying / i will ship them in hell

I quite like Tsuyu and her character. It’s refreshing to see a somewhat blunt female character who speaks her mind, is responsible, level-headed, and great in a crisis. She’s not only cute in her design but also in her reactions to other characters–her straightforward manner of making friends is very endearing to me. Even though she rarely gets as much of the spotlight as she deserves, I think that she and Midoriya could be a fine ship! In particular, I appreciate that if this ship was the main het ship, there probably wouldn’t be a lot beating around the bush and awkward romantic tension such as exists between Izuku and Ochako–Tsuyu seems like the type who would come clean about her feelings fairly quickly. Ha ha, it would honestly be pretty cute to see Midoriya completely flustered by having a girl confess to him–he’d probably melt into a puddle from the heat of his own blush.

I think this ship has a lot of potential and should get more attention from fans–maybe Horikoshi should spend a little more time giving Tsuyu some ship tease with other characters! I’m kind of partial to Ochako/Tsuyu myself.

KiriBaku:

vomit / don’t ship / okay / cute / adorable / perfect / beyond flawless / hot damn / screaming and crying / i will ship them in hell

There are some ships where you just have to ask yourself what the creator’s intent was. Like do you think Horikoshi intended for the fans to like seeing Bakugou and Kirishima together as much as we do? Do you think he sees all the fanarts and asks himself “What have I done?!” or, deep down, do you think that sometimes manga and animation artists create these characters just KNOWING that fans are going to ship them, and secretly embracing that fan reaction, even if they don’t ever actually plan on making the pair canon in actual material? Sometimes when I look at KiriBaku, I just get the feeling that Horikoshi knew what he was doing when he started drawing the two of them together.

I love that Kirishima has zero fear of Bakugou’s threats and crappy attitude, and that he also won’t just allow Bakugou to trample over others. He’s such a good kid whose gentle chiding and constant corrections seem to be improving Bakugou’s mannerisms and helping Bakugou to make genuine friends (however grudging Bakugou seems to be about it lol). Kirishima makes Bakugou a better person just by being around him! But it’s also true in reverse–I don’t know if Bakugou’s really deliberately trying to cheer Kirishima up or just stating what’s on his mind because he’s honest, but Bakugou’s supporting words have been massive motivators for Kirishima, whose greatest weakness has always been his internal feelings of inferiority.

A good, mutually supportive and beneficial ship. A+.

Kataang:

vomit / don’t ship / okay / cute / adorable / perfect / beyond flawless / hot damn / screaming and crying / i will ship them in hell

Ten years ago I was not the mature adult I am today, and although I myself was never an active part of the ship war between Zutara and Kataang, I definitely read every single piece of back-and-forth drama between these two ships that I could get my hands on and was vocally on the Zutara side. To be honest, I recall hating Kataang with a burning passion back then. I just disliked everything about it, from the stereotype schoolgirl/schoolboy crush vibe it radiated to the irritating “clingy jealous girl“ scenes that got handed to Katara… Not to mention that, personally, I’ve always found it a bit odd when girls date younger men–I’m sure this is just ingrained societal stereotypes coming out, but… ha ha, is it bad of me to say that I’ve always found men to be less mature than girls? Dating a guy who is your own age can turn into a babysitting gig if he hasn’t got his shit together… Dating a younger guy might be even worse. XD

I felt like a lot of chemistry between these characters was kind of arbitrary… Almost like “Katara has never met any young men who weren’t from her tribe before but now she met someone new and ooh, he’s so cool and different as the Avatar!” There wasn’t anything wrong with Aang–he was sweet and fun and strong. But I could never see what particularly would have attracted someone to him romantically; his vibe and attitude were so explicitly childish through the first half of the story that I never quite got a “romantic” vibe and it kind of made me, as a nearly twenty-year-old viewer, a little uncomfortable to even try to imagine a twelve-year-old in a romantic light. I feel like a lot of the Kataang shippers might have been on the younger end, and therefore more likely to see Aang as a reflection of themselves?

In any case, as a more responsible adult, I definitely have learned my lessons on shipping and letting others ship–if Kataang is your cup of tea, more power to you guys! I was never my ship, but I can respect other people’s love for it.

Zutara:

vomit / don’t ship / okay / cute / adorable / perfect / beyond flawless / hot damn / screaming and crying / i will ship them in hell

Obviously if you’re not a Kataang shipper, you’re a Zutara shipper. I don’t make the rules, just abide by them. Zutara was my bread and butter for as long as Avatar was on TV. I remember calling my friend up on the good old house phone with a cord I had to stretch to the max just to see the TV and talk at the same time, wailing about all the ship tease scenes for this ship. I still remember the heartbreak I felt when watching the ending of the last season and knowing that Kataang was incoming. I remember grumbling through every Zuko/Mai scene wondering why in the hell the creators hated Zuko so much they’d throw him together with someone so ambivalent as Mai…

I love red/blue, fire/water, opposites-in-balance ships, always have and always will. I love the imagery, I love their motifs, I love the personalities that come along with these kind of elementally-aligned characters; I love the weight and automatic tension coding two characters with these colors or other opposite features brings and how creators can bank on these archetypes to add additional depth to character interactions–there’s just something very tidy and pleasing about color-coded ships.

Not to mention all the other wonderful aspects of this ship. I really wanted to see this one in canon. Alas…

Jo/Laurie:

vomit / don’t ship / okay / cute / adorable / perfect / beyond flawless / hot damn / screaming and crying / i will ship them in hell

LOOK MAN. I might not have read Little Women since elementary school but you do not forget the perfection that is Jo and Laurie, the most perfect ship that never was. Screw you Louisa May Alcott, I’ll never forgive you.

I feel like, when you’re young and you read books, there’s that moment where you come across your first “real” romance, the first relationship where you go from seeing relationships as “blech, something for adults” to “this is why all the adults make such a big deal out of getting married because THEY’RE IN LOVE”–in some ways, what we read or see depicted to us through media early on in life becomes our lens for viewing and judging later relationships, and having Little Women as an early example of romance has definitely had a profound effect on my tastes and definitions of romance throughout the years, I feel.

Jo and Laurie had no right to never get together. It actually feels cruel, thinking about it in retrospect. How could their destiny be denied so coldly?! I’m getting sad just thinking about this lol.

Jo and Laurie were each other’s best friends, the absolute picture of “kindred spirits”–they understood each other, delighted in each other’s wit, and supported each other through the doubts and drama. There was an air about them that they existed in a world all their own, that they were just two very different people from all the other characters, who saw eye-to-eye in a way that others couldn’t touch and who brought out the best–and sometimes worst–in each other in a very vivid and human way.

They felt real, lovable, enjoyable, and made for each other.

And then it never happened. I’m going to leave my dissatisfied fan letter on Alcott’s grave, dammit.

[cherry-valentine]

Winter 2019 Anime Season, What I’m Watching:

My Roommate is a Cat is easily the cutest series this season, possibly the cutest in the past several seasons. Your mileage may vary, depending on how much you like cats, but for me the show is a delight. Following a reclusive young author who recently lost his parents (the only people he interacted with on a regular basis) as he bonds with a stray cat he decided to take in on a whim, the show cleverly splits its time between the viewpoints of the human protagonist and the cat. The smartest thing the series does is show both viewpoints of the same events, first from the human, Subaru, and then from the cat, Haru. And somehow, even though we’re viewing the events for the second time, Haru’s view is more compelling. The show is by turns genuinely funny and genuinely touching. Subaru reminds me of a less extreme version of Handa (from Handa-kun and Barakamon) in that he’s socially inept and usually assumes the worst intentions from those around him. Haru is a somewhat feisty young cat who thinks she’s protecting her strange, hopeless human. Haru is a bit rough around the edges after spending much of her life as a stray, and her tough attitude keeps the show from getting too saccharine. As it stands, the show is just the right amount of cute, sweet, awkward, sad, and funny. Very high on my watch list.

Meiji Tokyo Renka is yet another historical otome series (seriously why do so many otome anime have historical settings?) featuring a high school girl being sent back in time to the Meiji period. This is, of course, one of my favorite time periods just for the clothing alone. The character designs are varied enough to make all the guys stand out from each other and the colors and backgrounds are lovely. The heroine, Mei, is much more comical than the standard otome heroine and is refreshingly proactive in her own story. She’s surprisingly independent in a time period when that was probably frowned upon. There’s a strong supernatural element to the story, not even counting the time travel aspect. There are spirits in this series that only certain people can see, Mei being one of them (and it’s nice that there are several others in the main cast who can as well, preventing her from seeming too conveniently special). It seems like these spirits can come in many forms, from cute animal spirits to literal ghosts to characters in novels springing to life and escaping the books to run amok. The show is certainly not dull. The romance is almost shoved to the background to make room for spirit shenanigans, but I’m not complaining. One of the more fun otome series in recent memory.

The Promised Neverland is easily my pick for best show of the season. It has a fantastic setup, with a first episode twist that I did not see coming (I knew something was going on, but my guess was way off the mark). It has a unique art style that makes it stand out, fluid animation, awesome opening and ending themes, a kickass heroine, and some heart-stopping cliff hangers. It’s the show I look forward to most each week. There’s only one minor quibble I have with this series, and that’s the weird way faces are drawn. The mouths seem too high on the faces, to the point that I kept thinking their mouths were their noses. I’ve gotten used to it as the episodes rolled by, but every now and then I still notice it. It’s just... irritating. Still, that’s a super nitpicky  complaint for a show that’s otherwise excellent on every level with consistently high quality art and writing. At the very tippy top of my watch list.

Boogiepop and Others is a sequel (I guess?) to a much older series called Boogiepop Phantom that I watched many years ago. To be honest, it’s been so long that I don’t remember most of the details about the original anime. I just remember that it was a somewhat gloomy show that focused on supernatural mysteries and was episodic in nature. This newer series has an updated art style with more modern character designs. It’s also easier to follow, and has a stronger focus on action, whereas the original focused more on atmosphere. Special mention should go to Aoi Yuki’s phenomenal voice acting. She really brings Boogiepop to life and carries the show, much like she did as Kino in the recent Kino’s Journey anime. The show has great music, with my favorite ending theme of the season. Has a secure spot on my watch list.

B Project Season 2, an otome series about cute male idol groups, has seemingly decided to dial back the focus on the whole otome thing and instead showcase the borderline BL relationships between the boys. Seriously, there are several episodes in which the heroine, Tsubasa, is barely there at all, and even when she is, the series gives no real indication that any of the boys like her as more than a friend. Instead, the boys seem to be in love with each other (which is fine by me). This season adds a new boy band to the three we already had, which I felt was a little unnecessary. The new group really doesn’t add anything to the story. The music is nice, especially the ending theme, and the character designs are attractive. The series seems to have taken a page out of Tsukiuta’s book and now uses CG for the more elaborate dance numbers. The problem is that they don’t look nearly as good as Tsukiuta’s and definitely don’t blend well with the 2D animation around them. Overall, the series is cute but I still think of it as “less fun UtaPri”.

Fukigen no Mononokean Season 2 was a bit of a surprise for me, since I didn’t realize it was being made. I enjoyed season one very much with its pastel, candy-colored art and sweet, mostly light-hearted stories. And of course, the main draw of the series was the budding friendship between our two leads, Abeno and Ashiya. Season two keeps all of those elements and adds a very interesting mystery concerning Ashiya’s father, as well as an overarching plot and an actual recurring “villain” type character. The stakes are raised considerably, but the overall tone of the show is still fairly light and gentle. Seeing the cute mascot character Fuzzy (a white, furry youkai) makes me a little sad though, since it reminded me so very much of my cat (also a white furry creature named Fuzzy) while watching season one, and Fuzzy has since disappeared. Which reminds me, the youkai in this series are so adorable, varied, and charming. Very high on my watch list.

Kaguya-sama: Love is War is a comedy about two overachieving high school students who are secretly in love with each other but are too prideful to admit it, so they set traps for each other to try to force the other to confess first. It sounds like a dumb setup, to be honest, but it actually works surprisingly well. The two leads are likable despite being petty and stubborn. Even though they’re extremely talented, they have tons of quirks and they’re both completely clueless when it comes to love. There are a few fun side characters as well. The show is hilarious, with three skits per episode. There’s also a touch of sweetness as their affection for each other comes across as genuine. Anyone who’s ever been in love can relate to some of these moments, of going to great lengths just to increase your chances of being near the person you like, or making little changes to your appearance just to see if you get a reaction from them. Or, of course, the disappointment you feel when your carefully laid plans get ruined. The series uses humor and extreme reactions and hilarious facial expressions to convey these feelings, resulting in a highly entertaining show.

Carry Over Shows From Previous Seasons: Black Clover Run With the Wind Hinomaru Sumo Best of Season: Best New Show: The Promised Neverland Best Opening Theme: The Promised Neverland Best Ending Theme: Boogiepop and Others Best Male Character: Subaru (My Roommate is a Cat) Best Female Character: Emma (The Promised Neverland)

[blahblahwritings]

Baked Goods

A/N: Requested by @radxxregs . Another Bucky fluff which I thoroughly enjoyed writing!

Warnings: None just horribly cheesy domestic fluff.

Words: 1378

The team looked forward to Saturdays. It was the one day of the week that, if they didn’t have a mission, they would be able to skip training and relax, you included. They all had their own preferred ways of winding down whether it was a movie night, a party or a quiet night with a book and a glass of wine. Sure this allowed them to let their hair down, but none of that was why they really enjoyed Saturdays. They enjoyed Saturdays because you favoured baking.

 Life as an Avenger could get overwhelming, tiring and stressful which is why you turned to baking. Not only did it take your mind off whatever was bothering you, it also fed the team and kept their spirits high. You could and would bake anything from blueberry muffins, which were both yours and Bucky’s favourites, to chocolate chip cookies and pies. Stark even made sure to keep the cupboards stocked, especially after the one Saturday that you couldn’t bake because there wasn’t any flour left. No one had let that go.

 Today was no different as you washed your hands before reaching into the various cupboards for ingredients and mixing bowls, placing them on the small island in the centre of the kitchen. It was still early, only just turning nine o'clock as you let your headphones play music faintly in the background, starting to work on making the muffins from scratch. Your mind went blank as you swayed gently to the music, mixing the egg, milk, flour and sugar together.

 Meanwhile, Bucky was the first one to wake, sitting up and stretching slowly, wondering why the bed was so cold before realising that you had already gotten up. His feet lightly slapped the tile floors of the corridor as he drifted towards the living room in search of you. Upon entering the open area he caught sight of you, your dancing now in full swing as your hips shook to the unknown beat of a song. Light humming could be heard as you sauntered around the familiar space, pouring ingredients into different bowls and using the electric mixer when you couldn’t beat something into the right consistency. You were wearing his red henley which just reached your mid thigh, covering the shorts that clung to your legs. The sight made his chest swell as his eyes filled with an emotion akin to adoration but somehow more potent.

 A hand clapped on his bare shoulder, dragging him back to reality. Turning to see the culprit he found Steve with a small smirk on his face and a mischievous glint in his bright blue eyes. How long had he been there? A light blush caused his face to heat up making Steve grin wider at his old friend.

 “You’ve got it bad, Barnes” His fellow supersoldier mused. Bucky dismissed him with a playful roll of his eyes, flicking them back towards you as you continued to prepare various baked goods. He was right, you had captured his heart the day you two met, your gaze locking with his whilst shaking your hand for the first time. Unbeknownst to you, since that day you had him wrapped around your little finger. He would lay down his life for you if it came to it.

 “She’s my best girl, Steve. I’m mad for her.” He confessed with a chuckle. The blonde soldier hadn’t seen his best friend like this, well, ever. The love in his stormy eyes was unmistakable and only for you. Bucky’s statement had simply been a confirmation of Steve’s previous suspicions.

 Somehow, he found his feet leading him to the kitchen, his eyes taking in the movements of your small frame as you bopped about the place. Leaning against the doorway, a smirk made his way onto his lips whilst you remained oblivious to his presence. The sleeves of his Henley were rolled up as you were kneading the dough of a soon to be pie. Trays of muffins, cookies and apple turnovers were already cooking in the oven but you still had a chocolate cake mix waiting in a bowl to your right.

 Biting his lip he walked in as if he hadn���t been watching and as you saw him you jumped slightly, embarrassed that you could have been caught in the act of dancing to your music. After taking off your headphones you smiled warmly at him, taking in the sight of his bare torso but squinted as you took in the devilish expression painted on his handsome face.

 “What are you up to, James?” You questioned, pausing your ministrations on the dough for a moment as he practically stalked around the island towards your right side. You only used his first name when you were being serious with him, that or in bed. The smirk on his face only grew as he came closer to you, mischief evident in his eyes.

 “I just thought I should compliment your amazing dancing skills, you seemed rather talented from what I saw.” Your boyfriend teased wetting his lips slightly. At his words your face became warm and your eyes widened as you turned suddenly shy. Your behaviour caused a laugh to bubble up from his chest which in turn made him double over, clutching the counter for support. Before he could process what was happening a cloud of flour had made its home on his face, his laughter instantly ceasing. Of course, this left you in a fit of giggles making you vulnerable as he smeared chocolate mix over your mouth to stop your cackling. Now it was your turn to act shocked.

 “You’ve got a little something just right here.” He gestured to his mouth, sarcasm dripping from every word as you stared at him in mock anger.

 “Oh really well, gee, Buck, you should really help me wipe it off” You replied making him raise his eyebrows with a grin. “Where did you say it was?” You asked, biting your lip and tilting your head.

 “Right here...” Bucky whispered as he closed the gap between your lips. Your eyes fluttered shut as the taste of chocolate poured into your mouths, moving together in sync. The kiss was passionate and sweet as his hands found themselves gliding to your thighs as he lifted you onto the counter and stood between your legs. You carded your fingers through his hair giving a soft tug which earned a light moan in response.

 As you both parted you gazed into each other's eyes to find the same tender look staring back. He placed another kiss to your lips, this time more gentle and loving. Neither of you heard anyone walk in and were therefore startled when Tony spoke up.

 “Come on guys not where you make the food.” He complained, a hint of amusement in his voice. The dark, fluffy bathrobe waved behind him as he moved past you both in search of a drink. “Goddamn animals.” He added in a hushed tone as he grabbed a glass of fresh orange juice from the fridge before returning to the living room.

 With a chuckle, Bucky placed you back on the floor so you could continue baking, occasionally aiding you by cleaning as you went along. You filled the air with idle chatter of plans for a movie night tonight and when your next missions were, trying to find a day or night where both of you could spend some time together since interactions like this were sometimes scarce.

 At about half eleven all of the treats had cooled and been decorated, the kitchen and living room quickly filling with the sweet aroma of your morning's work. Obviously, this lead to everyone piling in, forcing you to slap several wandering wrists as they tried to take the pastries before lunch. Wanda had begun cooking with Vision as you were taking out the trays from the oven which lead to Clint and Nat to set up the table ready for the meal.

 As everyone moved to the dining room to sit down, Bucky remained with you as you tossed a blueberry muffin his way with a wink.

 “Shh, our little secret.” You breathed with a finger over your lips before moving to join the others.

[sage-nebula]

What's your general opinion on the first 5 pokeani girls prior to SM? I mean I obviously know Misty is your favorite, but just curious what you think of the others. You just listed what you thought of the recent Sun/Moon girls in the anime, so it would be nice to hear your thoughts on the older ones.

Misty — I really love how much dimension there was to Misty’s character, how she wasn’t boxed into a trope or even a stereotype. She’s The Tomboyish Mermaid (like, that’s literally her Gym Leader Title in the games), but although she does have some tomboyish traits like keeping her hair short, wearing shorts and kicks, and liking some rather … unusual pokémon (looking at her love for tentacool and tentacruel here), she’s also still allowed to have and champion feminine qualities as well without ever having that called into question. She can really want her own set of princess dolls, and love dressing up and looking cute, and get daydreamy over romance and the like without being doubted or treated like she’s lesser, and I really appreciate that. I also really appreciate the fact that she was considered to be one of Ash’s coaches from beginning to end, that although they were rivals at times, although they were friends and though they clearly had crushes on each other (yes, it was implied mutually in the Japanese version as well), Misty was still the more experienced trainer at the time they met and this was remarked upon even near the end of Johto. I do wish that Misty had been allowed to do more as the seasons went on—I feel that, especially in Johto, she was often sidelined in favor of Ash—but this was a fate that also befell Brock and Tracey in the OS, and so I don’t consider it a slight against Misty’s character in particular. MIsty was compassionate and brave, spunky and sarcastic, could at times be immature and impatient, but also had nice insight and patience at times. Misty was great. I loved her.

May — I really find that May was #relatable in a lot of ways. She was a brand new trainer (and Ash was sort of her coach, given that he was the more experienced one for once, which was a nice change), she loves food and never misses a chance to get a good meal in (and god help you if you stand between her and food), she has an annoying little brother that she still loves with all her heart and will protect, and initially she sets out on her journey not because she wants to be a trainer, but because she wants to travel. I think the fact that she didn’t like pokémon at first wasn’t very relatable, and I wish they had given her a better reason for it (I found the pokéball story to be a bit weak—wouldn’t that make her afraid of pokéballs instead?), but I think the fact that she just wanted to travel and have an adventure, that she didn’t really know what she wanted to do at first, that she found her goal along the way and fumbled her way through to success was pretty relatable, especially for kids who had just found the series and really were starting anew with AG. I think that May was really down to earth and overall was a great character, and even though I know some people took issue with the fact that she was so great at being a Coordinator right off the bat, I personally don’t mind that. She has a natural knack for it, and I think that’s something to be celebrated instead. May is awesome, and I love her, too.

Dawn — Dawn is the first true deuteragonist that the PokéAni has ever had and I think that was pretty excellently done. I love the fact that the heroine of the show finally got to be a true heroine, rather than just being a side character to Ash, and that she got a fully fleshed out story arc and her own character development and everything. Her relationship with Ash was downright adorable; I love how they were best friends, how they sometimes squabbled but also supported each other, how they always gave each other high-fives (and wasn’t High Touch!! a duet between them?). I also really do think that Dawn’s loss arc was really well done, how—in an inversion of May’s story—she always had her heart set on being a Coordinator, her mother was a Top Coordinator and so she thought that she could achieve that goal as well, and yet she was met with loss, after loss, after loss that crushed her confidence. I find the fact that she tried to keep a smile on during all of this and tried to insist that everything was fine to be pretty relatable, too. Overall, Dawn was pretty fantastic, and to be incredibly honest (and I mean no offense to Brock when I say this), she and Ash could have carried DP by themselves. Brock was really unnecessary and actually kind of suffered by being part of that squad. I’m sorry, Brocko, but it’s true. No offense. But yeah, Dawn is great, and I love her, too. (And yes, I do also ship Pearl. Still prefer Poke, but Pearl is a great ship.)

Iris — Iris gets so much hate in fandom and she honestly deserves none of it, do you hear me? None of it. I love Iris. I love how she teases Ash (and honestly, it’s just teasing, like ffs stop roasting her over the coals for it when practically all of Ash’s other companions have teased him at times as well), I love how she is free-spirited and brave, I love how she still has fears that hold her back (ice-type pokémon heyooo), and insecurities that make it difficult for her to achieve her goal (which is living up to her in-game Gym Leader Title, “The Girl Who Knows the Hearts of Dragons”), but that she eventually manages to overcome them and bond with Excadrill and later Dragonite. Iris is brave and spirited, but she’s also compassionate and gentle deep down. It just takes her time to access that part of herself and open up so that she can connect with the dragons she’s meant to connect with. And you know? Sometimes her teasing does go too far, but she acknowledges when this happens and makes sure that she makes it right (such as when she accidentally hurt Cilan’s feelings, but made a remark within his earshot about how he’s great and they all liked having him around anyway, and he bounced back as a result). Iris is adorable and lovable and I think the writing team did do a good job with her, even if her ending was rushed and awkward and weird. Love that girl.

Serena — Serena is a character that I think had a lot of potential, and that I do like in some ways, but ultimately I feel that she was rather shafted by the writing staff, who a.) didn’t know what they wanted to do with her for most of the XY series, and b.) created her to be a Love Interest™, which is a separate thing from creating her as a character who also happens to have a love interest. This one actually has some legitimate criticism (aimed at the writing staff, not Serena herself—I actually feel that Serena was a victim of the writing staff and deserved better, tbqh), but since that can be seen as negative, I’m putting the rest under a cut.

Serena was created, in the words of the producers, so that they could tell the story from the perspective of a girl who had feelings for Ash. This means that, from the get-go, the only concept behind Serena’s character was that of Love Interest™. This is different from, say, Misty, who did develop a crush on Ash as time went on, but who was created first to be a Gym Leader and a trainer with experience who could help Ash along the way, and also a Gym Leader who aspired to master water-type pokémon. Misty’s crush on Ash was incidental; it happened over time as a result of their interactions. Serena’s crush on Ash was part of her childhood backstory because it’s literally the focal point of her entire character, it’s why she was written into the show. Everything else—her personal desires outside of Ash, her goals and objectives—came secondary. Whereas May’s lack of a goal outside of “I want to travel and save the world!” felt like a reasonable part of her character, Serena’s lack of a goal ended up feeling like the writers honestly forgot to come up with one for her, because their sole concern was getting her to travel with Ash so that they could have her there to swoon over him, and that’s not cool. She deserved better than that.

Now, I’m not saying that she couldn’t have had a crush on him. Ash has had a myriad of characters crushing on him over the course of the series, to the point where even back in the OS Misty was far from the only person to like him. For fucksake, Ash’s own Bayleef is in love with him. A freaking Latias fell for him, like—that’s not the issue here. The issue here is that I feel as if the writers were so focused on having Serena swoon over him that they forgot to develop her outside of him. When they finally started to do that with the Showcases (and those are another issue in and of themselves, again for several reasons), it was inconsistent and often out of focus. The Master Class Showcase was rather rushed because, in all honesty, that’s not what the writers cared about with regards to Serena. Serena’s dreams, her goals, her ambitions—to the writing staff, it felt like they put that in there because they had to have her do something, but like it wasn’t really that important to them. And I feel that we really see this in the last episode, where, yes, she decides to go to Hoenn to try her hand at being a Coordinator (much better than being a Performer tbqh), but just before she leaves she tells Ash that she’s going to be a much better woman by the next time they meet and kisses him. The writers have said that this is supposed to imply that they’ll be married in the future. Well, okay—but a.) why is THAT the last thing you want to leave us with as far as Serena is concerned, and b.) Ash was still never shown throughout the entire saga to reciprocate her feelings, not even in ever feeling jealousy over her, so like?? Again, if this really was the ending you wanted for her, couldn’t you at least show the boy liking her back over the course of the saga in something other than shiny eyes in the last scene? Doesn’t she deserve at least that? Well, in their eyes, no, because it wasn’t really about Serena and her feelings, it was about making Ash look special by having a girl fawning over him, which is gross af.

Ughhh, I’m sorry—I really don’t want to rant about this, and this is technically supposed to be about Serena rather than the ship, but because Serena was created for the sole purpose of the ship it’s difficult to talk about one and not the other. In truth, I think Serena had so much potential. I like that she was stubborn about what she wanted to do, that she didn’t let her mother dictate her life, that although she loved her mother and knew that Grace wanted was best for her, she refused to give in and settle down to be a rhyhorn racer just because Grace wanted her to. I love that she has a natural big sister instinct, that she bonded with Bonnie and was shown taking care of her. I love that she flubbed the Showcases at first, but that she resolved to do better, that she cut her hair and decided that since she had her heart set on this, that she was going to see it through until the end and get those Keys, her own way. I think that she’s clever, creative, and genuinely sweet. I like that we see her open up over time, that while at first she was just there for Ash, she came to really care for Bonnie and Clemont as well (even if her relationship with Clemont could have been much better developed). And lbr, that episode where she cosplayed Ash was adorable af, and I loved her relationship with Manon.

Overall, I really do think Serena’s good, and I think that she had the potential to be a great character. However, I think the writing staff fucked her over by creating her to be The Love Interest™ and showing determined reluctance to think of her outside of that role. Serena deserved better. Misty might not have gotten to do a whole lot with regards to her goal, but at least she was allowed to exist as her own person first, and someone with a crush on Ash second. Serena was not given that, and it’s a damn injustice, especially since, again, they put in absolutely zero effort into developing the ship from Ash’s side, because Serena’s feelings truly did not matter to them. It’s a shame and she deserved better. 

Also, Misty and Serena would be adorable af girlfriends, I’m js.

(All of that said, @ everyone, don’t reblog this just to start Discourse™, I’m not here to debate it, never hear to debate it, want no part in your fandom wank, kthx.)

[linmeiwei]

Best love stories in literature (Pt.1)

I am a sucker for a great love story. I get emotionally involved with them, to the point of obsession, and often find myself going back to the best, most stirring moments, just to live through them again.

What makes a perfect love story? For me, it’s made up of believable characters who develop and find their full potential, the best in them, through their meeting and interaction with their love interest. It’s a breathless race through conflicts, so that in the end your heart is in your throat when you hope so badly it ends well, and then the conflicts are resolved, and it does. It must have moments of disagreement and confrontation, which must be delicately and carefully meted out so they’re fair, proportionate to whatever offence or misunderstanding is discussed, and emotionally satisfying. And which are later rewarded by moments of perfect understanding, which make your heart race. By the end you should feel like you yourself have just been proposed to by the man or woman of your dreams. Like you yourself have just tumbled into love.

I will leave out Pride and Prejudice and Jane Eyre from this list not because they don’t belong on it, but because they are absolutely the masters of love storydom. They are perfection, but I want to shine a light on less known, less appreciated stories, so that if any of you aren’t familiar with them, you might like to check them out. Of course, if you are somehow still unaware of Pride and Prejudice and Jane Eyre, please, don’t waste any more time, and read them right away. This will wait. 

For the rest of you, I numbered the greatest love stories I ever read below. They’re in no particular order of preference.

1. The Blue Castle

So this is a short, inconspicuous story with great emotional heft by Anne of Green Gables author L.M. Montgomery. Valancy is a plain, unassuming, shy girl who lives with a demanding, domineering family in the early 1920s in Canada. They make her feel unhappy and insecure. She lives a sheltered life, listening to orders and keeping quiet, until one day she is diagnosed with a terminal heart problem, and now that she’s confronted with her own mortality, she realises she hasn’t lived a day in her life.

“Rebellion flamed up in her soul as the dark hours passed by – not because she had no future but because she had no past.”

Watch Valancy tell her family what she thinks of them, and then leave them to pursue happiness while she still can. Don’t be fooled by the set-up, the story has a dreamy quality, and is full of life and joy and love.

While she was still the plain idiot of the family, Valancy was once smiled at by the rebel Barney Snaith, who lives in seclusion and who everybody thinks is a reckless criminal. Ever since, she’s held a quiet passion for him.

"Nobody with a smile like that could be bad, no matter what he had done."

Well, what do you think she’ll do now that she’s nothing to lose?

2. The Charioteer

This is a gay love story, and a literary exploration of homosexuality during the Second World War. It was written in the ‘50s by Mary Renault, who was a lesbian herself, and who made a career of writing more openly about the subject of homosexuality during the antiquity.

The Charioteer is a classic love triangle.

The main character is Laurie Odell. He hero-worships an older boy at school, Ralph Lanyon, though they’re not really friends and don’t know each other very well. But when Laurie finds out that Ralph is about to be sent down for indecent acts with another pupil, he goes up in rage and plots a school revolt to save his hero. Ralph calls Laurie to him and tells him to not be a fool about it, and in that moment they recognize the similarity between them, and a certain, latent attraction. Of course, Laurie’s pretty ignorant as yet about everything, and Ralph doesn’t want to spoil his chances of finishing school without scandal. Ralph ends up leaving, and Laurie ends up taking his place. 

The war comes and Laurie gets wounded at Dunkirk. The bulk of the story happens while Laurie is in hospital, recovering from wounds, particularly to his leg, which he is told will never be well again – he’ll forever live with a limp. He meets Andrew, who is an orderly at the hospital, a conscientious objector and a Quaker. Laurie falls for him pretty hard. Until, one day, he is confronted with Ralph again.

The title of the novel refers to Plato’s Chariot allegory in Phaedrus: a Charioteer has a black and a white horse pulling him forward, and the two animals are forever at odds, the dark one wild, representing lust, sex and irrational passions, and the other one calmer, representing morality and virtue. Obviously, in the novel the first one is meant to be Ralph, the second Andrew, and Laurie is the charioteer, who has to manage both.

Laurie has to make a choice, and as a literary novel this is certainly interesting, but from the point of view of a love story, there is so much there to make you weak at the knees. Yes, Andrew is sweet and they have some really interesting conversations, but my God is Ralph something. I mean, sure, you feel for poor Laurie having to make a decision between the innocent and naïve way in which Andrew loves him – a love that could never be consummated or even properly expressed – and the sexually experienced and driven Ralph, but for you, the reader, the choice will be a damned easy one.

“Come here, then,” said Ralph with gentle arrogance. “Come and say goodbye to me.”

I’m not usually a girl to fall for Alpha heroes. I prefer sweet men to the domineering ones, but Ralph is done just right – he has that self-assurance that comes from hard life experience and a down-to-earth rationality, which make him deserving of people’s attention, and yet he is considerate of others, and self-sacrificial for those he loves and cares about. He also has a knack of hitting the nail right on the head, which is so bloody satisfying sometimes, when Laurie has his head in the clouds and you fear he might do something monumentally silly.

“You see, Spuddy, my dear,” said Ralph, speaking with great kindness and with care that Laurie shouldn’t be hurt, “you have a very sweet nature, really, and you let it ride you a bit sometimes. You say [Andrew] has guts, but what you’re trying to do for him is to keep him like a mid-Victorian virgin in a world of illusion where he doesn’t know he’s alive. He mustn’t be told he’s a passenger when human decency’s fighting for survival, in case it upsets his religion. He mustn’t be told he’s a queer, in case he has to do a bit of hard thinking and make up his mind. He mustn’t know you’re in love with him, in case he feels he can’t go on having his cake and eating it. If he amounts to anything, he won’t really want to be let off being human. And if he does want it, then he isn’t worth all this, Spud. I’m sorry, but there it is.”

After I finished it (and my recommendation is not to read this while you have a deadline for something to meet, because I couldn’t put it down or think of anything else), all I wanted to do is to pen long, long essays about it. I could analyse each character in turn until my hands fell off. And I’m not the only one. There’s an online community of people who discuss this book passionately, and there’s a reason. Renault presents a tempting intellectual exercise about the value of identity, about self-expression, about love and sex. To me, though, it is still one thing at it’s very core, and that’s a hell of a love story.

3. Persuasion

I know I said I wouldn’t include Pride and Prejudice on this list, and in a way all of Jane Austen’s novels should be on here, but I decided to go with Persuasion because it’s my second favourite Austen novel, and because it is a purer love story than any of her other works.

What can I say about it that hasn’t been said a million and one times before?

Captain Wentworth and Anne Elliot had once been engaged, but because he was young and poor, and she was from a titled family, persuaded by her eloquent friend, she broke it off. She loved him, continued to love him, but thought she was doing them both a kindness when she ended it. He loved her, passionately, but disagreed with the decision and went off to earn his captaincy, and his fortune, without ever forgetting the love of his life. But when he returns years later, he’s bitter and angry with her for listening to others and not following her heart and marrying him back then. She had lost the bloom of her beauty in the meantime, and had dwindled into a spinster, ignored and used by others. And so now their roles are reversed, because he has his pick of the litter of eligible, beautiful and spirited women.

“Now they were as strangers; worse than strangers, for they could never become acquainted.”

I love how angry he is at her. Like in Pride and Prejudice, you just know that this is a sure sign that he still loves her, because if he didn’t, he’d just be indifferent to her. I love how stupid he is about the reunion. I don’t like all-knowing, all-perfect heroes. I want them to make stupid mistakes, and then have to make up for them, and Wentworth is probably the silliest of all of Austen’s heroes. He’s proud, he’s angry and bitter, and he makes some very stupid mistakes – just like a real human being would in this situation, especially one with his temperament. And I love, love, love that he remembers just how much he adores her because of how sensible and practical she is when the accident at Lyme happens. And the fact that his mere return, just being able to be around him again, makes her recover her lost bloom and breathes life back into her.

And then there’s the letter. I mean, Darcy wrote a good letter, but appropriately to the context, it wasn’t a love letter. But Wentworth’s letter. Now that, my friends, is how you make a lady swoon.

“You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope...I have loved none but you.”

4. Lord Peter Wimsey Mysteries

This isn’t a story conveyed in just one novel. The love story between Lord Peter Wimsey and Harriet Vane takes place in the span of seven books, of which only four pertain directly to the romance. You can easily just read those four, in this order: Strong Poison, To Have His Carcase, Gaudy Night and Busman’s Honeymoon, without having to bother reading any of the others (though you might want to because they’re all excellent).

Dorothy L. Sayers can be a bit of an acquired taste. Personally, I love her. Yes, she’s a literary person, with masses of references to classical works, and this might be a little off-putting, but there is a lot of intelligence in her mysteries, and for a woman who wrote in the 1930s, she is unapologetically clever and witty. I think she rubbed a lot of people the wrong way, because she was a woman, who was at once well-educated, outspoken, boisterous and bossy, so if she’d been a man she would probably have been worshipped and be better known today. But I love that she’s unapologetic. And I love that since she never met a satisfying man in her real life, she just wrote her intellectual equal in Lord Peter Wimsey, and then created her alter-ego Harriet Vane for him to fall in love with.

Lord Peter is a bit of an eccentric. He collects old books, he quotes from ancient texts, and he’s not traditionally handsome.

“His long, amiable face looked as if it had generated spontaneously from his top hat, as white maggots breed from Gorgonzola.”

In fact, people think he’s an upper class twit, a bit of a Bertie Wooster, an image he happily plays up to. But in reality he’s fiercely intelligent, extremely educated, physically strong and very, very brave. So he’s got that Scarlet Pimpernel vibe going, if you see what I mean.

And then one day he attends the trial of Harriet Vane, who is accused of having murdered her lover. Everybody thinks she’s guilty, but by a stroke of luck one juror can’t make up her mind, persuades a few more to her way of thinking, and so the jury has to be dismissed and another trial scheduled, and so Peter gets his chance. He solves the mystery and rescues Harriet from the gallows. But Harriet, a girl who isn’t particularly attractive physically, but who is a talented writer and very intelligent in her own right, is keen to be away from men after her tragic affair, and is too fond of her independence to give in to him. She rejects him.

“The best remedy for a bruised heart is not, as so many people think, repose upon a manly bosom. Much more efficacious are honest work, physical activity, and the sudden acquisition of wealth.”

Peter is in love, but what follows is a friendship and intellectual partnership as they’re thrown together again for two more mysteries, which take place some years apart. The way this is resolved in Gaudy Night is a dream come true for women of high intelligence and high independence.

“Wherever you find a great man, you will find a great mother or a great wife standing behind him -- or so they used to say. It would be interesting to know how many great women have had great fathers and husbands behind them.”

The idea of marriage and love for a woman at that time (and, I think, still today) is explored in a way that is both intellectually and emotionally satisfying, so that when they come to terms at last, it makes you very, very happy indeed.

“A marriage of two independent and equally irritable intelligences seems to me reckless to the point of insanity.”

This is a wonderful antidote to those who think that great romance must come from misogynist roots. In fact, this one was breath-taking precisely because it came from a feminist perspective.

5. North and South

Many think of this as a Pride and Prejudice but instead of being about class and rank it’s about industrialism and the north-south divide. And in that assessment they’re not entirely wrong. It nevertheless is a really good, satisfying love story.

Margaret is a proud southerner, a daughter of a pastor. Her father leaves the Church of England, and the family is forced to move north, where her father takes up a lecturing position. There Margaret finds herself completely lost. Nothing is the same as back in the south, which she feels is a much superior, idyllic, beautiful place. The north, to her, is a place of poverty and brutal inhumanity.

She meets Mr Thornton, who is the owner of a mill. Mr Thornton built up his business from nothing, through sheer hard work, brains and determination. As such, he is a rather hard, unforgiving man. Margaret, who is beautiful and intelligent, catches his attention, but she’s proud and dismissive of him, and like Elizabeth and Darcy, they have a series of impassioned conversations, only here they’re about equality, poverty, labour rights and morality.

There is much to discuss about the book, specifically relating to the rights of labourers, and the nature of capitalism, but merely focusing on the love story here, the lovely thing is how Margaret and Mr Thornton’s meeting is a meeting of two as yet unreformed minds about what is best, who come to change their opinions over time, soften them, to meet each other half-way. Plus, there’s nobody like Gaskell to make you really think that this one’s going to end terribly badly. Unlike any other book on this list, this one is littered with corpses and some very tragic endings. Sufficed to say, if you like your love stories angsty and nearly hopeless, this one is definitely for you.

“He knew how she would love. He had not loved her without gaining that instinctive knowledge of what capabilities were in her. Her soul would walk in glorious sunlight if any man was worthy, by his power of loving, to win back her love.”

I break this up in fives to make it easier to read, but there’s going to be a part 2 at some point. Let me know, what’s your favourite love story in literature?

[powerovernothing]

I want to know who are your top five favorite Death Note characters and why you love each. :)

I hope you’re prepared for essay length answers, my dear Sarah~ Just know that if I terrify my followers away because of my passion for an angsty 2005 Anime, then it’s completely all on you.

(Lmao I love you)

Also this reply got incredibly long, so for the sake of everyone I’m posting this under a Read More. Please click through if you want to hear my nonsensical rambles over Fictional Characters~

1: To the surprise of no one, my number one favorite character from Death Note would have to be L Lawliet. And while I do love both L and Light almost equally, there are just some aspects of L that make me love him far more. Mostly, because when it it comes to loving certain fictional characters I always adore and latch onto them for certain reasons. Maybe I love their story above all else, maybe their voice, or hell – maybe I see myself in them and in terms of L, I really do see myself in him.

I mean, I’m not going to sit there and say that I’m as intelligent as he is, because let’s be real I’m not that arrogant. But everything else about him really hits close to home. The certain quirks that he has that makes his character, the way that he is soft spoken and tends to say things without even thinking, how he loves sweets and finds a comfort in something that others would find odd.

No to mention his emotional levels, and how when he cares for something, he cares unconditionally and wants to keep it safe and cared for without even considering his own needs. (Okay, let’s be real that may be more of a headcanon than anything but shh~)

Lawliet is a very special character to me, even to the point of being a comfort character (Such as Bruce and Eddie) and I adore him deeply. What else is there to say?

2: My second favorite character in the series is Light Yagami. Which again, is not surprising to anyone that really knows me. As I mentioned I adore both the main two characters completely and not just for the way that they are written, but also because of how relatable and how they take risks in terms of creativity.

Light is a very remarkable character, with a mental duality between him and the role of Kira that is absolutely amazing to see in the series. To have an outstanding power fall into his lap and to see it come to the point where it consumes and breaks him further and further down and he is not even able to create a line between Kira - The God of the New World, and Light Yagami - The Genius Who Wanted Justice (Or only wanted to save his father, ex: the Drama) is utterly HEARTBREAKING and yet something I adore seeing play out.

But outside of the duality between him and Kira, Light is just an overall complex character and one that is really fun to take apart and put back together. Wondering just what was genuine, and what was fake. Wondering what parts of him was created from being Kira, and what was Light all along lurking beneath the surface. Wondering just how much he cared for someone, and what he would have done if fates had only given him another chance to make things right.

Hero or Villain? Right or Wrong? Light Yagami is a great character and one that stands out above the rest, as well as one that should garner far more appreciation than he gets. I just adore this troublesome and problematic child~

3: Coming in third, I have to say that if I had to pick a character to take their place underneath both L and Light…well, I do think that Near most certainly would be the perfect one. Now, don’t misunderstand me. I have not yet read the original manga run of Death Note – and while I’m hoping to fix that issue very shortly – anything in regards to my emotions about Near overall streams from the Anime as well as the Japanese Drama.

And honestly, I just love this child. Is he Lawliet? No, of course he isn’t. And he shouldn’t be! Is it a bit of a struggle to adapt to the presence of Near in the second half of the series (Manga or otherwise) and come to realize that L is gone and that someone else is going to bring down Kira once and for all? Of course it is, but that struggle really doesn’t last that long – or at the very least, it didn’t for me – and the moment that Near had his first interaction with Light in the Anime I was sold.

Not to mention that the expanded relationship between Lawliet and Near in the Japanese Drama warms and shatters my heart all at once. And I just thank the Drama for granting me more of their interaction, because seeing L play a big brother like figure to Near makes everything else that happens even more painful and I BLOODY LOVE IT.

He’s quiet spoken, he’s basically L’s little brother, he’s intelligent as hell, and his English Anime Voice Actors is literally Spike the Dragon from MLP and I just adore him. Here’s to you Nate, sweet baby boy~

4: Fourth favorite character in Death Note? Well, let’s be honest here, there’s only one person that I could love after the aforementioned characters above. And yeah, let’s be honest here, he’s a bit of a dork. A little too innocent for the world that he lives in, and maybe he ended up having his spirit broken because of it, BUT THAT’S OKAY. Because he wouldn’t be my forth favorite WITHOUT THAT SWEET STUPIDITY.

And that would be the one and only Touta Matsuda!

Oh yeah, you know it! He is an absolute little dweeb, and I just want to hug him and protect him from the dark and scary world of Death Note, because no. Don’t touch him. He is just far too pure and sweet and deserved way better than anything that happened to him and please darling never cry again.

But seriously though, I adore this guy and the entirety of his character. In a series like Death Note, it’s always good to have the every-man, and Matsuda is perfect at his role. Soft spoken, gentle and caring, and just innocent and tries to find the best in every person – even if that person ends up being Kira in the end. And that is just a great show of character, and his titular episode in the Anime is one of my favorites overall.

Also he deserves at least 90% more hugs, and I may have ended up shipping him with my Every Fandom OC Brianna, BUT SHHHH. IT WORKS AND IT’S LOVELY AND IT IS A GLORIOUS OTP.

5: Fifth favorite character? Even after I went on a massive spill of emotions of those four characters above? And you expect me to go on ANOTHER FOR MY FIFTH? AS WELL AS CHOOSE?

Nope.

My fifth favorite character is a tossup between Watari and Soichiro. Because they are just simply lovely and adorable men that have the absolute worse kind of job in trying to keep a handle on their wayward children, and I just really appreciate everything they are and all they do.

Also Watari is a precious wrinkled bean in the Japanese Drama and if you have not witnessed such precious old man cuteness, you are DENYING YOURSELF.