#there is also a couple about the band of exiles

[creativechaosmaker]

I was just looking through the fanfics I never posted and damn there are a lot of them. Some are of decent length too.

But I’m not part of the Sjm fandom any longer so I can’t even finish them.

[violetasteracademic]

I just finished cc3 and I’m worried the next book will be about nesta. Why do you think the next book is still about elain?

Hello my darling anon! Congrats on finishing CC3, you have sent this to a rare bird in the wild who actually enjoyed the hell out of it despite the flaws. So I hope you had a good time!

I'm a bit nervous to show you guys this side of me. Well, I suppose I've been showing it, but to compile it in such a way is quite another ordeal. That being said, I have toooons of links and resources to share why, for me personally, it is so clear that Nesta's story is *not* over, and Elain's book is undoubtedly next. Both of these things are true, but it has everything to do with the direction of the multiverse, which is very tightly woven, and *not* ACOTAR 5/6, which has been in the works for near a decade. Save this. Come back to it. Take your time working through it. I'm giving you everything, anon!

We have two parts at play: ACOTAR and the new series, which I have no doubt in my mind is Twilight of the Gods (more on that later) so lets start with facts before we move on to theory.

I am positive Elain's book is next because Sarah's messaging has remained 100% consistent since signing on the ACOTOR spinoffs in 2016. Moving forward from ACOWAR, she wrote ACOFAS as a novella to "bridge the gap" between ACOWAR and the spinoffs, and set up the future of ACOTAR. That was completely true for ACOSF, where everything that was set up has come to pass or been expanded on so far. The introduction of the Blood Rite, Nesta's mental health struggles, Morrigan being assigned to Vallahan, and the continued escalation of Elain's relationship with Azriel and Lucien's with the Band of Exiles. We meet Emerie, we learn more about the struggles of the patriarchy in Illyria, so on and so forth.

Then, we have ACOSF. The first dual POV romance of ACOTAR. This was only the beginning of a long term plan of dual POV romances coming to fruition. Here is youtube video from early on in the process describing the spinoffs as standalones that feature a different romantic pairing each book, but form a backbone when united.

By 2020, after ACOSF was announced, Sarah reiterated again that the new spinoff series features a new couple each book, with their own miniature plot and romance resolving within the overarching story of ACOTAR. Here she also shares that she plans to write a *lot* more than what she is contracted for, and has a ton of different ships to choose from. You can watch that here.

And now we move to 2021, after ACOSF was released, and Sarah confirms she always planned to write a book about Elain here.

This is actually a great interview and one of my favorites. You can watch the whole thing here. Eva Chen is a real one.

As far as ACOTAR goes, Sarah has continued to confirm in multiple interviews that her initial plans regarding the spinoffs have not changed, and still largely follow that initial outline she pitched back in 2016. And it was always going to be Nesta and Elain.

I will reiterate, ACOTAR is its own series with its own structure. Every ACOTAR book will feature a new couple with their own romance story. ACOTAR will continue to be exclusively a romance series from here on out. A lot of people speculate a lot of things on the future of ACOTAR. That we'll get a big finale with a multi-pov, that the story will end after Koschei, that we'll have a Kingdom of Ash style book. None of this is true. Sarah is going to keep contracting ACOTAR books until she runs out of couples. If you think this sounds odd, keep in mind that SJM herself is a fan of and grew up on Nalini Singh, who has series that started in 2006/2009 and are still going, featuring a new couple each book:

So, this is not strange behavior for the genre, and I think SJM is excited to have an ongoing fantasy romance series like this. And I'm excited for us to read it!

So, no KoA multi-pov finale. No second Nesta book. ACOTAR is an ongoing romance series with an "unspecified number of books remaining."

Okay! Now let's talk about Nesta! Bone Carver voice: Nestaaaaaaa

I'm going to do something just for you, Anon. And whoever catches this in the next week or so. I left titkok as far as booktok/content making and whatnot and privatized all my videos with my face on them (for a variety of reasons. Some fandom/bullying related, some not) but I did a massive breakdown of SJM's publishing contracts and all of the lore for Twilight of the Gods build up. I did get some of my screenshots from other Tumblr accounts, and linked my sources in the caption! Give this a watch (it's long) and pop back over.

Obviously if you spend some time in the comments section, mostly the questions at large are regarding timeline. I'm happy to chat theory, but focusing on Nesta, it is incredibly important and specific that she had her role in CC3 and that she connected The Valkyrie to Midgard, aka Middle Earth in Norse mythology which is where Twilight of the Gods, aka Ragnarok takes place. We have seen Midgard, Hel, and I have no doubt we will see Asgard.

But take a look at the difference between Nesta and Azriel's journey in CC3. Nesta had a deep emotional arc with Bryce. She developed trust and a relationship with her that Azriel didn't. In the HoFaS bonus chapter, Nesta forged a bond and a relationship with Bryce's mom, Ember. Nesta and Bryce's development is what is important here: Nesta has now created the bridge between the Valkyrie and Midgard. Valkyrie are the chosen fighters of Odin in Twilight of the Gods- the war at Ragnarok.

Twilight of the Gods is coming, fam. Crescent City three also revealed that The Mother, Urd, and Wyrd are all the same entity. The Goddess of all creation and fate. She oversees all worlds, and another important but oft overlooked element in the CC3 crossover is the frequency of the conversations about the Gods:

So yes, Nesta still has a huge arc coming up baby! She is not done. No one is done. But the Valkyrie are gearing up to play a major role in TotG, not the next ACOTAR. I believe this also grounds the continuation of the tension between Nesta and Rhys, and these two powers at odds when it comes to making decisions. Rhys will protect Prythian first. Nesta is building the bridges to other worlds, and is willing to fight alongside them. Rhys has no relationship with Bryce and Midgard. Nesta does. And lets not forget the Pegasi!

CC3 was not about Nesta. It was about Bryce and Nesta. Giving the Starsword back to Nesta is simply because that is who Bryce had a relationship with, and will continue to have a relationship with in the multiverse, not because Nesta is getting another book. Honestly- who else was she supposed to give the sword, Mask, and Truth-Teller back to? Twilight of the Gods will feature characters from all worlds. Sarah confirmed it will be emotional to write because of the old faces we'll see pop up in her Today Show interview here. This interview was thoroughly structured and planned, and released on the same day as HoFaS.

Speaking of the Starsword, let's talk Azriel and his role in CC3. Azriel is now the only person we have seen carry both the Starsword (likely Gwydion from here on out) and Truth-Teller. Light and dark. The power that combined to unleash the magic on Avallen, otherwise known as the Prison/Dusk Court in Prythian. Nesta has her own sword, Ataraxia. We have not seen Nesta touch, wield, or use Gwydion. Only Azriel has.

There is only one other character at home in Prythian who has also wielded and used the full power of one half of that pair of weapons: Elain.

Nesta used Truth-Teller to cut off the kings head, yes, but Elain used Truth-Teller to travel through the shadows across a battlefield with no experience and no training. She held that blade, and it worked to her will, tapping into its magic.

Azriel also learned about the corruption of the Cauldron. This was his primary experience in the crossover- discovering that the Asteri, who force mates and curate bloodlines to create powerful offspring which they then churn through a soul meat grinder for food warped the Cauldron to enact their will. Azriel did not form a relationship with Bryce, or Ember, or form any sort of additional connections to Midgard the way Nesta did. His part of the story revealed the problems at home. His (likely) love interest is the only person who has used his blade there, while Azriel is the only person who has used Gwydion. Bryce notes that Azriel must have some Starborn blood in him. Silene confirms that the Dusk Court can only be nurtured and looked after by Starborn heirs.

So while Nesta's compass in the crossover pointed to Midgard and her developing relationship with Bryce, as well as her clear willingness to work with her, Azriel's compass pointed home. It pointed to his lineage, to the corrupted Cauldron, to being one half of Gwydion and Truth-Teller combining, the Dusk Court. All of which points us to...

Yup. Elain.

If this STILL isn't enough for you, I have made a few additional posts regarding The Glass Coffin (aka Sleeping Beauty, which Bryce plays for Azriel in the HoFaS bonus chapter) and some, but not all of the little Elain coded details in HoFaS. You can find those posts here and here.

I could keep going forever. I can reiterate that there was not one but two ACOSF bonus chapters, and both were about Elain. I can talk about about the fact that SJM always planned to write a book about each sister, and ACOFAS was about- duh- each sister. But this is already so long and full of so many links and resources. The wrap up is this- ACOTAR is now an ongoing dual POV romance series. Until she tells us that is no longer true, it is true. A new couple each book. Nesta and the Valkyrie are key players in Twilight of the Gods. Sarah confirmed she was writing Crescent City and Twilight of the Gods at the same time. The multiverse is happening, and it just takes a little bit of exploration to understand where the characters are likely headed.

I'll end on this note. Azriel and Elain are light and dark. This belongs to them. The bridge of connection between them- Truth-Teller:

Now look at how the combination of the Starsword and Truth-Teller is described in HoFaS, and tell me if it looks familiar to you:

And now alllll together again, fam! Who are the only two characters who have properly wielded and/or tapped into the power of the Starsword and Truth-Teller in Prythian?

Azriel and Elain.

I think that's everything. I hope this comforts you. I genuinely don't ever feel worried or confused. It is all so clear to me how Sarah wove this together, and I think it's absolutely brilliant. Eep! I just get so excited! So take a little bit of my excitement and release the fear. Half of the people making content on this blatantly hate one half of the next book and they willfully ignore that she has had one of the most beautiful, breathtaking, well foreshadowed and woven storylines in the history of SJM's writing. Of course that is only my opinion, but honestly, how could you NOT be impressed and excited?!

I can't wait. I just can't heckin' wait.

If you got through all of this, wow. You're the real MVP.

[pastelpinkkadan]

If we look at it from a PURELY logical and text based standpoint (no theories, no opinions on ships, no “I feel like…”, JUST text), we can pretty much guarantee two things.

Elain is the next MC.

Azriel is also the next MC.

Why?

Because everything has been set up for BOTH of them.

Azriel has gotten a bonus chapter from his POV. The most important part of that BC, was the FACT that it was from his POV. Just like Cassian got his own POV to help set him up for ACOSF. If Az was not the next MC, there’d be NO reason to give him a POV chapter. Absolutely none.

Elain is connected to pretty much every remaining plot point that the ACOTAR series has. The Dread Trove, Koschei, and yes the Band of Exiles. She has some sort of connection to each of these things, whether it’s through her Seer powers, court politics, or connections to other people. She is also the ONLY Archeron sister without a book yet. And, if we’re going off the clear pattern that SJM has set, she is obviously next.

If Lucien was next, he would have gotten a POV chapter. Or at the VERY least been in ACOSF in some meaningful way. But he wasn’t, at all. In fact Eris was featured more than him! This was the time to set Lucien up and SJM didn’t do it. Where was HIS bonus chapter? Where was HIS scene with Elain? Nonexistent.

If Gwyn was next, she’d be connected to ANY of the remaining plot points I mentioned. Obviously connected, by the way, not far reaching theories. But she isn’t. Like, at all. Hell, SJM could have easily had Gwyn say she was ready to leave the library and go explore the world, try something new, go on an adventure, or ANYTHING related to having her get her own story. Literally anything. But Gwyn went back to the library at the end of ACOSF, and SJM made a point to mention that.

Two characters have obviously been set up to have their stories told . Only two.

If the next ACOTAR book was about Elain and Lucien, you’d have to COMPLETELY ignore Azriel’s POV chapter and everything SJM has been giving him.

If the next ACOTAR book was about Azriel and Gwyn, you’d have to COMPLETELY ignore major plot points that borderline REQUIRE Elain to be present in them in a big way. And add a character that has NEVER been apart of these plot lines before, and wasn’t added to them during ACOSF either.

It’s not about “what ship you think is better”. It’s about what is ACTUALLY and BLUNTLY there in the text. With text, it doesn’t require imagining a bunch of scenes that haven’t happened or how you THINK two characters would act as a couple. It’s already there.

If you have to ignore entire characters and plot points, if they can’t exist or be around to make your ship plausible, then it’s not as valid as you think.

Thank you and make sure to tip your waitress.

[lovemyromance]

Not the antis trynna rebrand death and the lovely fawn to be about everything except Elriel 😭😭

Y'all it's in the book. Word for word. No interpretation required.

If y'all don't like it - call SJM up, I guess? Tell her you think it's stupid because telling Elriels "death and the lovely fawn" is stupid is not going to change what has been printed in the books.

Like sorry SJM didn't write fox and the lovely fawn instead even though they're literally mates... so awk when the FMC of your ship gets paired up with a different man, amirite? Y'all are the definition of if you don't have something, you gotta ruin everyone else's fun too.

Because you know what is also cheesy and stupid as hell? Lady Death. Don't see anyone critiquing that one, though. Like she got an entire book and her powers were...??? Silver flames? How does that even relate to "lady death"

SJM is just a cheesy author who loves her titles. You gotta accept in and move on. She's been describing couples like that forever, and giving titles to groups of people to make them even more badass. Valkyries, Band of Exiles, City of Dreamers - these all fall into the same bucket so if we're critiquing Death & The Lovely Fawn, those are fair game too.

Feyre/SJM actually did break the 4th wall kind of and called out the "Band of Exiles" for having a dumb name and what did y'all do? Flamed Feyre and called her an asshole for it.

You're gonna like some names, and not like some names. They're all going to be cheesy because it comes with the genre and we don't actually live in a fantasy world where such terms are used. I don't make my bf dinner and get anointed with "beloved potato peeler"

But again, you rolling your eyes and laughing at these titles SJM writes isn't going to change what they are in the books. And what they are is something of significance.

[feyresdandelion]

I don’t know if anyone has brought this up, but it has been a thought I have had since I first read the books, so here we go.

Oftentimes, I see the argument that Vassa and Lucien can't end up together due to the fact that he is fae and immortal, and she is human and mortal.

Ignoring the fact that SJM has previously given us couples who are also mortal/immortal pairings (Dorian/Manon, Elide/Lorcan), in the ACOTAR world, we have had mates between humans and fae: the Archeron sisters and their respective mates, Drakon and Miryam.

Now, let's talk about Miryam, who is a big piece of my theory. She is connected to the band of exiles by Jurian, and I do believe SJM is not done with the whole Jurian/Miryam/Drakon plot. I believe she will end their plot in Vassa and Lucien's book (if they get one), thus introducing the whole "Miryam was mortal until Made" concept.

If you forgot (which a lot of people did, but it somehow stuck with me), Miryam wasn't immortal until she died and was later resurrected and made immortal by an object created by the Cauldron.

I believe if Vassa and Lucien do end up being endgame, SJM has two options: either keep Vassa as a human woman and thus mortal, creating a situation like Lorcan/Elide where he chose to give up his immortality for her, or make Vassa a fae/immortal being with the same object Drakon used to save Miryam.

So the whole argument of "they can't end up together because Lucien is immortal and Vassa is not" is completely invalid in my opinion.

Also, the fact that Eluciens always say that Elain is going to rule the Day Court with Lucien because she is described as the sun, but completely erase the fact that Vassa is a literal queen. She has been taught how to rule since she was little, something that Lucien has never been taught to do due to him having so many brothers. (I also believe that in breaking Vassa's curse, which would require Helion's powers, she will somehow absorb some curse-breaking powers, although that is a talk for another day.)

[acotar-taylorsversion]

Future ACOTAR Books

Ok, so Sarah is contracted for 2 more acotar novels and a novella, right?

Here's how I'm thinking its gonna be laid out.

ACOTAR -1, ACOMAF -2, ACOWAR -3, ACOFAS -novella 1, ACOSF -4

ACOTAR 5 - Elain's book with Azriel as love interest. I believe she will reject the bond with Lucien and help Nesta and Az with the trove and locating Koschei, the prison, Az and Nuala and Cerridwen helping her with her seer skills since it can be related to spying, and all that. There's much that could happen here and some many questions could be answered.

Novella 2 - this can be Vassa and Lucien's. I truly believe that if Elain would reject the bond, Lucien would allow himself to discover something with Vassa. This would push the story along for the Koschei storyline because I believe that Lucien and Vassa will be heavily involved with that. Sarah made Lucien a part of this band of exiles for a reason. We could also see or hear about what the inner circle is doing through their povs or through some type of correspondence through Lucien. This could possibly start while Elain's story is going on as well, if she rejects the bond early on in her book. She could even tie in Mor and what it is that she's doing since she's trying to get more allies for Rhys. And even Eris since he will be dealing with Beron and the aftermath of being caught. Seems like a lot but Tower of Dawn was meant to be a novella and look how that one turned out.

ACOTAR 6 - this could be a multi pov novel that centers around all the sisters and their chosen loves. And don't tell me she won't because she did it in acofas. OR it could be in feyre and Rhy's povs because they are sarah's favorite couple and if she had to end the series with any couple I believe it would be them. But anyway, I believe that Koschei will be the final big bad for acotar and its gonna take a lot to defeat him. it's gonna take everyone coming together just like they did with the king of Hybern. I also believe that people are gonna die. I've always felt that Mor would be the one to die and maybe Lucien, and Helion, and Tamlin. I think that a couple of courts would be left without high lords and this would allow Rhys and Feyre to become High King and Queen, especially after what we learned in HOFAS, its pretty much his birth right. Wouldn't be something since Tamlin told Feyre that there were no such things as High Lady's and she would end the series as High Queen! lol

This is what I think will be happen, and it's my opinion so I don't need anyone telling me that I'm crazy or delusional, none of that. Based on what happened in frost and starlight (the one that sarah said she set up the rest of the series in), I believe this is what could happen. Do I think Nesta's story is done? No, and we could have her pov in the last book with her sisters. Do I think the valkyries are gonna be main characters? No, I don't because I think they are there mainly for Nesta and I only see them helping with battles and maybe some research. That's it. Do I think the illyrians will be important? Maybe, but sarah has been known to forget about some plots or just completely shut them down in the next book. Remember how we all thought Kallon from frost and starlight was gonna be Cassian's enemy #1 in silver flames? Don't remember him at all? Exactly.

Sorry for the long post, I just have to get all of this out of my head before it drives me crazy. Just so y'all know, I'm pro elriel, feysand, nessian, vassien (if Lucien survives). I don't see how elucien could ever be a happy mated couple, and I don't see how people think Gwyn and Az could ever be romantic and you can't say the next book is Nesta's and say that sarah will have gwynriel as the couple when they would be side characters. Each book will be centered around a couple, right? Did she say new or established? I can't remember but the main couple wouldn't be in the background. And I don't see how Gwyn could carry an entire novel. I'm sorry, I just can't. It would be half of silver flames and I don't think Sarah will do that. And I do think its messed up how sarah and Bloomsbury have let this nasty ship war go on for this long.

But I do believe that this series started with Feyre and her sisters and it will end with her and her sisters. I believe Sarah has made such a big deal with 3's for a reason. Do you guys remember that scene in mist and fury where Mor (whose power is truth) painted the 3 sisters and 3 brothers on the wall in the cabin? That meant something. Mor's reaction to almost every Elriel interaction means something just like it did with Nesta and Cassian. Azriel being able to smell Elain's mating bond and questioning the cauldron means something. The sisters being Made means something. The fact that the cauldron was messed with means something.

Anyways, these are my thoughts. Sorry that this is so long. Please be kind.

[acourtofquietdreamers]

“Elain shouldn’t have to convince anyone that she belongs in the Night Court.” “Elain needs to leave the people that coddle her.” “Elain just needs to give Lucien a chance and she’ll realize he’s perfect for her.”

Elain is often criticized for being passive and not standing up for herself yet some people believe she shouldn’t fight for what she wants and what she believes in. She should just run away. She should just give in to the mating bond and give Lucien a chance. She should continue being passive.

I believe Elain’s growth would be more impactful if she continues down the path we’ve begun to see her go down where she passionately fights for what she wants and doesn’t back down. We may not have Elain’s POV yet, but Elain has made her feelings known on a couple subjects. I’m focusing on Elain’s words only because I do not believe others know what’s best for her.

Elain very confidently declared herself as a member of the Night Court.

When Feyre had offered to let her remain home, Elain had squared her shoulders and declared that she was a part of this court—and would do whatever was needed.

Should Elain abandon her declaration and leave the place she’s begun to build a life in because she looks plain in black? Or because Nesta thinks Spring is made for “someone like her”?

Or should she prove them wrong by earning her place within the court (cue Elain using her powers) and show the claws she’s been hinted to have?

Elain no longer wants to be coddled by her sisters and we see her stand up to them for the first time in ACOSF.

Elain remained in the doorway, her face pale but her expression harder than Nesta had ever seen it. “You do not decide what I can and cannot do, Nesta.”

“Shall I tend to my little garden forever?” When Nesta flinched, Elain said, “You can’t have it both ways. You cannot resent my decision to lead a small, quiet life while also refusing to let me do anything greater.”

Elain cut in sharply, “I am not a child to be fought over.”

But Elain said, “I went into the Cauldron, too, you know. And it captured me. And yet somehow all you think of is what my trauma did to you.”

Should Elain run away from this battle and leave her imperfect relationship with her sisters behind?

Or should she continue to address the issues in their relationship so they can come out stronger?

Elain has made it clear that the mating bond means nothing to her, regardless of others trying to convince her to give the “nice guy” a chance.

“You are his mate. Do you even know what that means?” “It means nothing,” Elain said, her voice breaking. “It means nothing. I don’t care who decided it or why they did—”

“You belong to him.” “I belong to no one. But my heart belongs to you.”

“He brought you a present.” Those doe-brown eyes turned toward me. Sharper than I’d ever seen them. “And that entitles him to my time, my affections?”

“No.” I blinked. “But he is a good male.” Despite our harsh words. Despite this Band of Exiles bullshit. “He cares for you.” “He doesn’t know me.”

Should Elain give in to the pressures of giving her mate a chance? Forget about her dream of a love that would trump even a mating bond?

Or should she fight for a love of her own choosing?

I don’t want Elain to give in. I don’t want her to be passive and let others make decisions for her. I want to see Elain surprise everyone and continue to fight.

[short-wooloo]

From Jediism to Judaism: Star Wars as Jewish Allegory, by Daniel Perez

A look at some of the Jewish elements – coincidental or otherwise – of Star Wars.

A long time ago in a place far, far away...

It is a period of civil war. A new government has declared the practice of the old faith a crime punishable by death, disbanding an ancient order of sages and sending many into exile. Rebel fighters, striking from a hidden base, have won their first major victory against the evil Empire, stirring a spirit of defiance among the populace. Outarmed and vastly outnumbered, the ragtag band of rebels – aided by an all-powerful, all-permeating Force that binds together all life in the universe – remain the only hope for restoring peace and freedom to their people.

It's one of the greatest epics known to mankind. No, not Star Wars. The above synopsis is actually the story of Hanukkah, the eight-day Jewish festival that commemorates a miraculous victory of Israelite insurgents against the tyrannical Seleucid Empire roughly 2,200 years ago.

With Star Wars Episode VII set to premiere in just a few short weeks, I got to thinking about how certain aspects of the Star Wars universe are eerily similar to the history, beliefs, and teachings of the Jews. Now George Lucas did not set out to create a fantasy universe full of Jewish references, but the connections are nevertheless there. So let's put the “Han” back in Hanukkah (Harrison Ford, by the way, technically a member of the tribe) and look at some of the Jewish elements – coincidental or otherwise – of Star Wars.

A Galaxy of Hebrew Names

The heroes of the Star Wars series are members of a “rebel alliance,” basically Maccabees in outer space. It's right there in the name: Jedi. The Hebrew letter yud is often anglicized as a “J,” and syllables occasionally get dropped in translation. Hence, a Biblical name like “Yehoshua” makes its way into English as “Joshua.” It's not much of a stretch to see how “Jedi” can be derived the original Hebrew word for Jew, “Yehudi.”

Remember Luke Skywalker's Jedi rebbe, Grand Master Yoda? Is it just me, or is his peculiar syntax reminiscent of someone whose first language is Yiddish (“Yodish”)? More to the point, his name sounds a lot like “yada,” the Hebrew word meaning “to know.”

And how about those Skywalkers? Luke Skywalker might sound like a gentile name, but that name was clearly chosen to alliterate with his twin sister Leia (Leah). Also keep in mind that their parents were an interfaith couple. The father, Anakin Skywalker, played by the unmistakably un-Jewish Hayden Christensen, tried to convert to Jediism, but as we know he ultimately turned to the Dark Side instead. Their mother was Queen Amidala, portrayed by the beautiful and talented Israeli-born actress Natalie Portman. Suffice it to say their marriage did not end well, and it wasn't until much later in life that their children discovered their Jedi-ish identity.

Learning Academy

When an aspiring Jedi Knight goes to the Academy, he or she must complete what is essentially an apprenticeship with one more learned in Jediism than they are. Similarly, a future rabbi's yeshiva experience will consist largely of chavruta learning (studying with a partner – lit. “friendship”). Fun fact: The name for a young, unmarried yeshiva student, “bochur,” actually means “chosen” (as in “The Chosen People”). The idea of a foretold “Chosen One” who would “restore balance to the Force” was a theme running throughout the Star Wars films, wherein Anakin Skywalker was recognized for his extraordinary potential as a Jedi. As mentioned above, he went “off the derech” and became the villainous Darth Vader. In Return of the Jedi, however, Vader/Skywalker fulfills the “prophecy” when he does teshuvah (our term for repentance, which literally means “return.” Whoa. Return of the Jedi!), thwarting Emperor Palpatine to save his son's life, and ultimately, the galaxy.

Of course, if you tell a young rabbi-in-training that he is the “Chosen One,” it sounds cool and dramatic and is technically true, but then, the same can be said of all of his classmates.

While the Star Wars films don't feature Jedi trainees delving into sacred texts (it doesn't make for the most exciting movie montage), some of the greatest rabbinic books of ethics and Jewish philosophy would be right at home in any Jedi library. “Duties of the Heart,” “The Path of the Just”....tell me these don't sound like the reading list for a hero of the Light Side.

The Force

While Jediism isn't a theistic religion per se, its practitioners do teach of a Force that, in the words of Reb Obi-Wan Kenobi "...is what gives a Jedi his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us; it binds the galaxy together." That almost sounds like some sort of Chasidic teaching – just replace “energy field” with “entity” or “consciousness,” and “created by,” with “that creates,” and what you have starts to come across less like new age hippie talk and more like an introduction to Kabbalah, Jewish mysticism.

One idea that devout Jews of all stripes share, is that God, the creative “Force” that sustains all, is the source of a Jew's power. “Ein od milvado,” there is none besides Him. The Jew expresses his or her connection to the universe by striving for an ever closer relationship with its Creator.

Another aspect of Jedi belief is the notion of balance, the idea that the Light Side and the Dark Side are both aspects of the same Force seeking equilibrium. The religions that branched off from Judaism tend to show the Creator and Satan, or “The Devil,” in an adversarial relationship, almost a sort of de facto dualistic theology with a God and an anti-God, if you will. Judaism maintains that the Satan (lit. “Accuser”) is the angel associated with temptation, and prosecution in the Heavenly Court. He's basically Slugworth to God's Willy Wonka. He's got a dirty job to do, but in the end, we're both serving the same Boss.

Judaism also teaches that the source of Light and Darkness are One and the same, as it says in the prayer book: “Blessed art Thou, Lord our God, King of the Universe, Who forms light and creates darkness, Who makes peace and creates all things.” The source for this line of liturgy can be found in the Hebrew Bible, Isaiah 45:7: “Who forms light and creates darkness, Who makes peace and creates evil; I am the Lord, Who makes all these.”

Incidentally, one of the traditional names for God – invoked particularly by the Jewish mystics – is HaMakom, literally “The Place.” The deeper idea conveyed by this name is that the Creator does not exist within the universe; the universe exists within Him. It sounds a lot like The Force. The key conceptual difference between the fictitious all-uniting Force of Star Wars and the Shechinah or “Divine Presence” is that the former is impersonal and passive, the latter is an omnipotent consciousness that actively intervenes in human history, speaking with Prophets and working miracles until this very day.

So if you see the new Star Wars movie, directed by Jeffrey Jacob Abrams (who couldn't sound more Jewish if his name was Saul Cohen or Herschel Rosenblatt), perhaps you'll be able to seek out and appreciate the surprisingly Jewish flavor of the Star Wars universe.

Happy Hanukkah, and may the Force be with you!

[cosmiischillin]

Twilight Town: The Frankenstein Twins

Sometimes I got to remember Frank and Len have been and always will be my favorites of the show and I think they’re the most popular aside from Misery and Ruby. I even drew a sketch of them from memory and now Twilight Town exists.

And since I have grouped both twins together. It’s gonna be a long one for the monster analysis. Especially since they’re based on a monster with a LOT of lore and background so let’s get started now

Why is the design part so damn long??

I always saw the twins with two different styles, especially in the Rock aesthetics. Frank would be the 50s-70s style of rock. The checkerboard and pomp hair definitely played a part there. It’s why he got jackets and more biker/greaser type style (growing up my mom used to do a happy Days musical). Len is the punk era of rock. Messy hair, flames, and just extra edge. His fashion was experimental and less clean as his brother. Aside from that I gave them different instruments. Frank has “Devil’s trophy” a golden bass and Len has “Tombstone” a tombstone styled guitar.

So when I was making the twins. The original concept had them still conjoined in adulthood. In fact most of my early sketches had them like that. They could only split apart with magic. I even had a storyline that they asked Jackie to do that and they would live non-conjoined for 24 hours. In the end, the decision would be that they would split as adults via surgery.

The choice of making them separate was the multiple struggles that would come once they’re adults. Relationships would be complicated, one sibling would have different ones compared to the other, and ultimately, they couldn’t blend in pretending to be a costume which I already made a post about, almost getting killed by humans.

The Modern Prometheus

I think I got the idea that Frank and Len were Frankenstein monsters from talking with my friend who is also the co-creator for ENAF. Honestly there was a lot of details that would work for that concept. Frankenstein’s monster sometimes gets his names shortened to be just Frank or Frankie, different illterations had him green (on rare cases blue), and even the visibility of stitches (which took me 13 years to see). So once I had them be the sons of Frankenstein’s monster (which is actually Frank 1) and Bride of Frankenstein (who is named Eliza) I did as much research and story writing about the whole family as I could. It’s why they have white hair streaks, hate fire, covered in stitchesand are affected by electricity. They get shocked and burned just as much as misery sometimes lol.

With the idea that they can eat humans is simply the fact that they’re undead monsters, almost in similarity to zombies. They’re far more intelligent and controlling than them since they have active non decaying brains and creations are different. The two have a rule with Ruby that they can only kill and eat humans who harm or attack them so they don’t just go by eating them all the time.

Background and Origins

There was a man named Victor Frankenstein. He lived nearby a monster sanction. Rather than react in fear, he was friendly to them which led to his exile from humanity. With no family to have, he created two monsters via science, Frank and Eliza Frankenstein. The couple were happy with Victor, even taking up careers in music becoming popular musicians with Victor’s support. (Oh and I have designed both parents. *yay*)

At some point, Eliza had twins who were unfortunately born stillborn due to lack of vital body functions. Since this would be likely the only chance the monsters could reproduce, Victor sewn the twins together and reanimated them back to life. The twins would be named Frank and Len and would live most of their childhood with their family before moving to Twilight Town as teenagers with a growing band.

When they were 18, they decided to undergo a procedure done by Victor that would give them two complete bodies by using their dna to replicate their bodies. After that they were no longer conjoined but no matter it, they still prefer to be close.

Next Up: Polyphemus

[nottyourlover]

Broken Bonds - ch 2

a/n: prolly 4 ch's now :) sorry this took 800 years i kinda put off writing this bc i didnt want to disappoint but here it is.

ALSO SORRY THERE WILL MOST LIKELY BE ~7 WEEKS OF HIATUS AFTER THIS.

series summary: as azriel leaves for a long mission in vallahan, you find that clinging onto old bonds does nothing to heal them.

contains: angst, still mental health themes, pregnant y/n, off-page death, language. slowburn ???????

word count: 8506 (oh gosh)

ch 1 // ch 3

***

Many weeks passed, and with each day, the void left by Azriel's absence grew wider, but luckily you found yourself surrounded with some of the best people in the world, you thought. As always, Feyre was wonderful; she helped you get out of bed, she re-ignited your passions. She listened to you vent about your relationship, gave you advice and she constantly surprised you, always with a little gift from a new store in The Rainbow. However, one of the best surprises you received didn't come from Feyre.

About two weeks after Azriel's departure you had received a letter from your childhood friend Aiden and his now fiance, Malakai. You couldn't believe it, because it had been centuries since you'd seen Aiden, let alone been contacted by him, but on the other hand you saw Malakai weekly. He was Cassian's right-hand man, and you learnt from him after the wedding that Aiden had become a healer who travelled around Prythian, practicing in all the courts. Their jobs were different in every way, but they complemented each other perfectly.

It was unexpected, the letter, but you couldn't have been happier to hear from them, especially because the envelope held an invitation their wedding.

The wedding was a modest celebration, but all the Inner Court members attended to show their support for the happy couple. Kai had known Cassian, Rhys and Azriel for years, since training together for the Blood Rite, and had stayed in touch for centuries after. He was now Cassian's Lieutenant General who commanded the Night Court's forces where Cassian was otherwise preoccupied with Inner Circle business. You knew him from the occasional training session, and you were glad that the two of you had gotten a lot closer after the wedding. He had become fast friends with the rest of the Inner Circle, and after the wedding Aiden also befriended them. It was almost laughable how you had managed to miss that the male Kai talked so fondly about, the healer that had stolen his heart, was your friend. Your Aiden.

Even if the last few months of your own life were less than ideal, the newly-wed couple had become your rocks, and you knew they would eventually become amazing parents since they were so doting towards you and your baby.

You were still early in your pregnancy but careful nonetheless. Although you still planned to work for as long as you could in an attempt to maintain some sense of normalcy, you quickly realised that it was going to be somewhat of a struggle hiding your pregnancy from the rest of the Inner Circle for any longer. Training was not any easier as no one suspected anything, and Mor and Cass still held their monthly game nights when they drank like there was no tomorrow.

Under Feyre's insistence, you had lessened your field work and so majority of your days consisted of writing letters to the other High Lords and leaders in attempt to strengthen alliances and unite the various factions within Prythian, hoping that it would create a better world for your child to grow up in. Due to past efforts, relations with the Day, Dawn, Summer and Winter courts were strong, and you were certain you had their support. The Spring Court with Tamlin, and Autumn with Beron were other matters, however. Perhaps you would ask Feyre to use her sway with Lucien who could convince Tamlin to at least reply to one of your letters, but you had recently heard Lucian say that he had not visited Spring in a long while, instead opting to stay with the Band of Exiles. Then you thought about High Lord Beron. He was a grumpy, disagreeable High Lord, and also a problem for another day, you had finally decided.

The first week and a half after Azriel's departure, you had rarely gotten out of bed, even when Feyre had tempted you with tarts. You felt bad that Cassian looked so regretful when he couldn't cheer you up when you neglected morning trainings those first few weeks. He thought it was because you were missing Azriel, and you were, but even more so, you were worrying over your pregnancy. When Feyre had finally managed to get you out of the house, the two of you mainly walked up and down The Rainbow, visiting the old bookstores and trying all the new bakeries.

Aiden was staying in Velaris for his honeymoon, but he still insisted on working, the kind male he was. You found happiness in visiting his healing clinic, helping him organise records and patient data. Listening to stories of his travels had inspired you like nothing else could. He told you about the catacombs under the Dawn Court, the unique architecture and history of Day.

His stories made you miss your mate, of the adventures the two of you had planned for the future, but you vowed that one day you'd travel with Azriel again. You tugged on the bond softly, something you had been doing since he left to feel connected. You weren't even sure if he could feel it though, since he never 'replied'.

Over the course of around two and a half months, you started to feel lighter. When you thought of your mate's return you started to feel optimistic. Maybe a break was the right decision, no matter how unplanned it initially was.

***

You had been spending most of your Sundays in Aiden's clinic, him helping with the pregnancy and keeping you company. You were browsing his bookshelves when you stumbled upon a book about Illyrian anatomy. It hadn't fully dawned on you yet that the child you were bringing into this world was likely going to come out with wings, but Aiden assured you the birth was not going to be too difficult seeing that you were half-Illyrian yourself. Your father had been an awful person, but at least he gave you the gift that would allow you to start a family with the one that you loved.

Obviously, a lot of trauma and pain occurred at a health clinic, but there was lots of warmth and beauty too, and it was becoming more apparent to you than ever. The young fae that lived in Velaris would occasionally come knocking to sell their sweets, or on quiet afternoons, Aiden would seek them out and give them some harmless (but hilarious) potions that would do crazy things, like temporarily turn their bodies invisible, colour their hair an electric blue, or even make them grow scales. Aiden was the finest healer in Prythian, and you were disappointed he could not stay for much longer than his honeymoon period before he needed to return to the road.

One such Sunday, the 12th week of your pregnancy had finally arrived. You were looking at your reflection in the full-length mirror, hand on your stomach.

You were showing. This was real.

You admired the swell of your stomach under the light, flowing dress. You looked... healthy. Glowing, even. Your features were not so hollowed out anymore, your cheeks fuller and eyes brighter, filled with shine. You felt better than ever.

But it was heartbreaking that your mate's absence had caused this, in a roundabout way. You closed your eyes, taking in this special moment. You reached to tug on the bond, and you swore you felt a glimmer of warmth before the string in your mind felt cold once more.

Aiden's voice dragged you out of your haze. "Y/n, are you ready to do the scan?" he asked, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder.

An "ultrasound" is what Aiden had called it. On his travels to the mortal lands, he had studied in the most advanced medical institutions on offer and was bringing this human technology to Faerie. This ultrasound was supposedly a sort of test they did on mortals with child, to verify the health and gender of the baby, and he was going to perform one on you today with the help of some of his healer magic to help.

"Just lay back on here, your dress should be stretchy enough for you to just lift it up..." Aiden trailed off as he fiddled with a tub of gel and a weird device, he explained he was going to lightly put on your stomach.

"In the Mortal Lands, they have these screens that show the mother the baby, but since I couldn't lug back a large computer, I'll compensate with a simple incantation. Unfortunately, this does mean you won't be able to keep any physical images of your baby."

You frowned slightly. You didn't even know it was on the table, to keep pictures of the little one growing inside you. You sighed a little as you readjusted the pillow and Aiden got to cleaning up. They would've been nice for Azriel to see, you supposed.

"Oh. That's okay, there's nothing you can do about it," is what you settled on saying. It had been centuries since the you had seen Aiden again, and after being somewhat abruptly pushed into each other's lives again... it was awkward, sometimes.

"I trust you," you added, "But exactly how many times has this magic-and-mortal-device combination been used for ultrasounds?"

Aiden flashed you the same boyish grin that got the two of you out of trouble when you were younger and given that your mother was... well, who she was, that was a difficult feat indeed. It was one of the reasons you had stuck with the slightly infuriating male who stood before you today; he would always protect you. Of course, this was until you had lost touch. "Well..." he pretended to do a thinking pose. You hoped he was joking.

You narrowed your eyes at him, but you doubted he could even see you. "Aiden? This is safe, right?"

"Just kidding, y/n. Of course, it is safe for use and has been trialed numerous times."

"Not funny." You muttered to yourself.

Under Aiden's instruction, you lifted up your dress until it was just under your bust. The masses of fabric were somewhat blocking your vision, but even so, you lifted your neck slightly to try see what Aiden was doing.

"It's interesting how mortals compensate for not having magic, this gel is especially interesting," he mused. He had become such an intellect, always curious and ready to learn. You were somewhat shocked to see what he'd made of himself, so different from that class clown you used to know.

You couldn't do more than make what hopefully came out as a sound of interest, as you weren't really able to see what "gel" your friend was even referring to.

"This might feel a bit cold," Aiden said, before he applied a thin layer of a wet, smooth mixture to your stomach. "It'll help this little machine to see your womb."

"Sure," you reply. What else could be said?

"Oh! Wait." You add abruptly. Aiden stopped his movements instantly. "I... don't want to know the gender." You finished, chewing your lip slightly.

"Are you sure?"

"Yet. I mean, yes. I don't want to know yet. I'll find out when everyone else does, whenever that is."

Aiden sent you a confident smile. "Okay, y/n/n."

After that, he seemed to sense your nervousness, and so after the gel was applied, Aiden placed a comforting hand on yours, which were busy pulling at the seams of your dress. The clothing suddenly felt too thick, and the breezy material no longer cooled your skin, but instead made it itch, and the back of your neck felt hot. He changed the positioning of your bed with a small flick of his wrist, in a swift motion. Slowly, your upper body rose to a sitting position while your legs stayed flat. This way, you could see what was happening.

Then you heard it, and suddenly, there was too much to say.

Unmistakably, there was thumping. Muffled thumping that seemed to echo around the room.

Aiden had big grin on his face. He met your eyes only for a moment before returning to the task literally in front of him. You realised he was concentrating hard on a small floating projection, a clear screen that showed all sorts of charts and figures. In the center of the clear screen there was a black rectangle that had something moving in it. Different shades of greys and white danced across the screen in pixelated motions but they all moved together, as if they were forming something whole.

"Is that...?" you asked softly. You couldn't get the words out, because your heart was in your throat. It was difficult to see, from the weird angle that you observed the screen in, but it couldn't have been anything else.

Just like when you were kids, he read your mind.

"Yes, y/n," he breathed softly. His fingers floated across the keyboard on the bedside table. which you suspected was somehow connected to Aiden's magical projection.

The perfect mix of fae magic and mortal engineering.

At last, Aiden spoke.

"That's the heartbeat."

***

It had been 2 weeks since that first ultrasound, and you were talking with Feyre about breaking the news to the rest of your friends. The two of you were sitting in the courtyard, the late afternoon sun casting its warm, friendly glow. You marveled at the beauty of the gardens a "Oh, I'm so excited for you! Your baby is going to be spoiled like crazy," your friend exclaimed fondly, a big grin on her face.

Hearing Feyre's enthusiasm calmed your nerves immensely, and you reached for your High Lady's hand. "I wish Az was here," you admitted, "if he was, I'd do something bigger. I think I'm just going to tell everyone at dinner."

Feyre's glance softened at the mention of your mate. "That sounds good, but y/n, I hate to mention this now but when are you going to tell Azriel?"

You bit your lip, averting eye contact. "I'm not sure, actually. Whenever's best, I suppose."

"You can be honest with me, y/n/n. I just think you should tell him."

"Of course I'm going to tell him."

"But your baby's going to be born before he gets back, surely you're not going to have him come home blind-" Feyre said insistently.

You started to get a little annoyed. "I will tell him, Feyre. He will not 'come home blind'."

But were you sure? Would Azriel even reply to your letters? Would he care enough to write more than his usual 5 sentences? A pain ran through your heart as you recalled the last time you wrote was about a month ago. He hadn't replied. You didn't want him to be distracted on the mission, or worse, hurt himself because he was worrying.

Feyre could read your expression. "Are you really thinking about lying to your mate? About your child. His child, y/n. It's Azriel's too."

You fought the urge to roll your eyes. "Gods, Feyre. You think I don't know that? Stop pushing this, it's my decision and if I want to leave it until he comes back... then that's on me." But deep down you knew she was right.

Your words just hung between you as the conversation ended. You didn't believe what you just said, and by the silence that fell, you could tell Feyre didn't either.

The two of you sat in your respective chairs and avoided eye contact, Feyre was fiddling with the sash on her dress, and you were looking into the sky, eyes squinting as you immediately regretted staring straight into the sun.

"Feyre, darling?" called Rhys' smooth voice. You glanced at your wristwatch, which indicated Feyre and Rhys' meeting was about to start. You sighed a little; you would have to apologise later.

"Here, Rhys!" Feyre quickly gathered her things but put a comforting hand on your shoulder as she passed. "Bye, y/n."

Then Rhys whisked Feyre away, leaving you alone in the courtyard.

You didn't want to keep sitting in the courtyard rethinking your conversation with Feyre. Or perhaps was it an argument? You quickly left the gardens as soon as the sun started setting, in hopes you would bump into another one of your friends. You walked towards the door to the main house and luckily, the moment you turned around after closing the door, there was Kai, gathering some items in a satchel, looking like he was about to leave.

You wondered if you should bother him as he looked busy, but before you could sneak off, it seemed that Kai used his big-brother senses because he turned around and spotted you.

"Y/n! My favourite person." He beamed, tucking strands of his golden hair behind his ears.

"I think Aiden might take some offense to that statement." You approached him smiling, yet slightly embarrassed he had almost caught you jumping over a couch.

"I'm sure he agrees with my sentiment." Your friend smiled.

"Going somewhere?"

"Just off to the Night Markets to buy a sheath for Aiden's present. It's a dagger, from my last mission overseas," He cocked his head slightly, as if trying to see if you were okay. "Would you like to join me?" Kai broke into a beaming smile. "We can get ice-cream."

You couldn't help grin as his words lit you up. The two of you used to always get ice-cream together, it was your thing. The ice-cream stores in Velaris changed their flavours daily, always a mix of aromatic spices and exotic fruits that somehow blended perfectly together. It was well-known amongst all your friends that Night Court ice-cream was one of your favourite things, and almost every birthday you got a tub of your favourite flavour, whatever it was. It reminded you of happier days, and some of your favourite memories consisted of you, laughing along with Kai over large cones of the sweet, icy treat.

"Really? I'd love to!" This is exactly what you needed to help you take your mind off your disagreement with Feyre. "I hope I'm not intruding though."

"You could never intrude. Besides, I could use another set of eyes. You've seen my wardrobe; I don't exactly choose the most stylish things." He bumped your shoulder affectionately.

You snickered. "That I have. Then you're lucky I took pity on you and offered my services to you."

Ever the drama queen, Kai lowered himself into a deep bow, "I thank you then, y/n."

Being with Kai had lifted your mood almost instantly. You had confided in him through your highs and lows, and when you had shown such intimate parts of yourself to another, it was easy to settle into comfortable companionship. He was like an older brother to you, one of your closest friends.

You watched Velaris' bustling marketplaces in awe as Kai soared through the air, his wings flapping. It had been a while since you had come out to see the signature Night Markets, but it was just as breathtaking as you remembered. There were crowds everywhere, and each store had twinkling lights. It was dark now, the light from each stall was illuminating the air around it, the mountains were shining a soft white from the snow, and you felt like you had returned home to the familiar sights, sounds and smells.

Kai led you to a few shops, and gods, it was lucky you were there. Somehow, he managed to pick out some of the strangest, weirdest designs that there were. It took almost 20 minutes of convincing before Kai discarded a sheath that was covered in ridiculous dyed fur that also had googly eyes stuck to the front, with eyebrows that jiggled when you removed the dagger.

"It's like an adorable fluffy animal!" He exclaimed.

"Kai, no. It looks like a mutilated toy rodent. I think I see bugs moving in the fur, and it smells like Cassian after training."

Kai whistled. "Harsh critic."

You shrugged, looping your arm through his to drag him back through the door. "I just saved your marriage, my friend."

Eventually you two of you picked a simple design. A sleek black design with silver buckles that was functional enough to store a pen or two, as well. Perfect for Aiden. Knowing him, he probably would use the sheath to store some of his equipment for operations, and the like.

"Thanks for helping me tonight," Kai smiled. "I owe you one."

"Don't mention it. All you ever need to owe me is some ice-cream." You almost jumped when you saw the old gelateria where the two of you frequented decades ago. Had it really been decades?

Kai seemed to be thinking the same thing because the moment the two of you sat down, he smiled, wistfully asking, "Do you remember the last time we came here?"

You hummed in thought, trying to come up with an answer. "I don't think I do. Must've been to celebrate something?"

Kai grinned. "No, not to celebrate. I remember," he started.

"Shocking how someone so old has a better memory than me." you smirked.

"Hush, y/n/n. Surely you remember, as it concerns your favourite person."

"My favourite person? So, not you then," you laughed.

"I'm wounded." Kai replied, deadpan. "No, anyway. I mean Azriel. You came to me after a big fight with Azzy."

You opened your mouth in shock. "I can't believe you still remember that!"

"Well, hard to forget," he said, dryly. "I had never seen you so upset." His expression turned pensive and worried, as if he was sensing the truth in your expression, which had turned from shocked to anxious with one sentence. He was sensing that maybe you weren't letting on exactly how saddened you were regarding the situation with Azriel. Of course, only Feyre and Aiden knew you were with child, and this factor contributed greatly.

"You know, because now you two are doing a lot more than just argue..." Malakai tried to lighten the mood, and for a second it worked. Then he did that stupid thing that mortals do; he made a "kissy face"... and then some.

Your eyes widened, but you had a big grin on your face. "Gods, Malakai! You did not just do that in public!" but your friend just smirked, innocently shrugging his shoulders. You wouldn't stay mad at him anyway. Never could.

The two of you finished your cones in silence.

"Let's walk around for a bit," Kai said, wiping his hands with a napkin.

"Okay, sure."

You and Kai walked behind the bustling marketplace to a lone bench where the two of you used to come all the time. It was your spot.

"I do have something to tell you, though."

"Oh yeah?" Kai looked as if he was trying to guess your news.

You took a breath in to steady yourself. "I'm telling you before most of the others... because I trust you. And I love you, you've always been..." another small inhale. "Maybe you can help me figure out what to do."

Kai swiveled so he was facing you more. "Of course," he smiled. "You know I'd do anything for you."

You smiled gratefully. "You may know that Azriel didn't really leave me on the best terms... Well, uh, he didn't leave me, specifically, you know, but I just mean that we'd argued before he left." You rambled. "A lot, actually. We argued a lot."

Kai put a comforting hand on your arm. "You don't have to tell me if you're not ready," he said gently, kindly.

Kai kindness overwhelmed you, but lately it had felt like Feyre was treating you a bit like a broken doll, and she was just waiting for you to finally crack. Being doted on wasn't a bad thing, but it felt suffocating especially now, and you felt Feyre's time was wasted when you realised that only one thing would make you feel better about this situation, you were too much a coward to do. It should've been easy, telling Azriel he was going to be a father. You were good at writing, letters especially. So why couldn't you tell Azriel?

Everything is just more complicated when love is involved.

You cleared your throat. "Sorry. I'm fine. I'm ready to talk about it, I promise."

"Okay," Kai nodded. "No pressure."

"I'mfourteenweekspregnantandAzrieldoesn'tknow." The words spilled out like a waterfall. A small brook, perhaps. All in one motion but in a low whisper. There was no going back now, but it seemed Kai hadn't heard your jumble of words.

"You're... what?"

"Pregnant. I'm 14 weeks pregnant and Az- Azriel doesn't know." you were dangerously close to tears, but you felt a million times better now that you had told someone else.

Kai was silent for a dangerously long time. Then his mouth curved into a small grin. "Wow, y/n. I'm so happy for you!" and then he clarified, upon seeing your slightly startled expression. "I know you've been wanting to start a family for a while now, and you're the most deserving person to have your dream come true." He took a deep breath in. "I'll admit it's difficult that Azriel doesn't know, but you're strong, and we can work through this together."

You had started to cry. "S-sorry, I'm happy too, I- I don't know what to do. I've been k-keeping it from you for so long, and I just don't know what to do." Your voice broke.

"You don't need to apologise, I get it. It's going to be difficult, y/n, but you don't need to do it alone."

"You've kept a pregnancy from Aiden before?" you sniffed.

He smiled softly, wiping a trickling tear. "No, but I know relationships take work. What you and Az are going through is only natural, and you're both the strongest people I know. I see the bond you two have, and it's like no other I've seen." He stretched over the table to wipe away a tear falling down your cheek. "It's beautiful, y/n. I know you, and I know Az. He will support you, and whatever you choose, so will I."

You sniffed again, wiping away more tears. Gods, there were a lot of tears on your face. Kai pulled a large, thick handkerchief out of his pocket and handed it to you.

"Aiden makes me carry it around, the massive thing. A real inconvenience. However, I've been told it makes an excellent torniquet." the warrior shrugged.

You managed a laugh. "Thanks."

Kai's expression softened. "Are you happy?"

His question caught you by surprise. "I've been processing these part few weeks. We were fighting because just noticed Azriel got increasingly unenthusiastic about our dates. About me," you felt the lump in your throat as you spilled your heart out. "S-sometimes I feel the b-bond go cold. Since he's been gone I can barely feel it, Malakai. I have to reach oh-so-far for something that should be permanent. Something that should be natural, and easy."

Kai wrapped you up in a hug, and you rested your head on his shoulder.

You took a pause. "But am I happy? I think so. If I can work this out with Az, then I will be. Really happy." You smiled slightly at the thought.

Kai nodded knowingly.

"Looks like you've only gotten wiser with age," you noted, slightly sad. Where'd all the time gone?"

"I guess we've both just gotten busier these past few centuries. You were sorting out your... confusing friendship with Azriel," you let out a laugh at that. Confusing was certaintly one word you could use to describe the relationship you and Az had before mating. Kai continued. "Well, and then you found out you were mates, but I was busy training here while trying to keep my relationship from my parents."

Your smile dropped a little. "But they were at your wedding, are you guys still okay?"

"Thanks for your concern, but we're all good. It's just that when I was younger, I saw how the villagers treated my sister when she confessed to me she favoured females, and word got out. It was a miracle no one blabbed to my parents before she finally told them decades later," he smiled. "I'm lucky my family are so supportive."

"I have a pretty great family too," you squeezed his hand.

The two of you sat in silence for a beat, smiling.

"Wait, before you said '"most" of the others know about your pregnancy. Who else knows?" Kai asked after a moment.

"Well, Madja, obviously, and Feyre and Aiden."

"My Aiden? He kept this from me?" The Lieutenant's eyes looked like they were going to bug out of his head. Aiden was definitely about to receive a stern lecture about how his wedding vows promised no lies.

You laughed. "Well, smart guy, your Aiden is a healer, and I couldn't exactly go visit Madja because Rhys is always there on High Lord business, and Cass occasionally brings his soldiers there for checkups, you know this. Besides, Aiden's clinic is more private, and I like getting priority service," you replied, smug.

Kai sighed, "And here I was thinking that I was the only one getting that service. When you think you know someone." he tutted.

"Well, people surprise you." You couldn't help but bitterly think "Just like my mate did."

"But I know your news before Cass?" When you nodded, he did a celebratory fist pump. "I always knew I was your favourite. $5 for me, baby."

"Don't be silly, I love you Illyrian babies all equally. Wait, you guys bet on me?"

Kai snorted, choosing to ignore your latter comment, but the gleam in his bright blue eyes told you all you needed to know.

You just rolled your eyes. "When do you think I should tell the rest of our friends?"

Kai composed himself as he realised you were jumping back to serious conversation. He cleared his throat, and said, "Well, you want to tell them all together, right?"

When you nodded, he continued. "So, logically, unless you want to tell everyone while they're drunk playing board games, or drunk, dancing at Rita's, I'd say your best bet is at our group dinners, but you know, tell them early, so they're not too drunk." He gave a small smile.

"That's what I was thinking. Gods, when's the next dinner again?"

You counted what day of the week it was in your head. If you guys usually gathered for dinner on Fridays, but the Velaris Night Markets occurred on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays... but Thursdays were when Feyre and Rhys had their meetings (which you remembered Feyre had gone to that afternoon), it would mean that the next family dinner was...

"Tomorrow," Kai finished helpfully. "Friday."

"That's soon," you tried not to sound too panicked.

"Luckily you have me to help you then."

***

The Inner Circle sat around the grand dinner table in the beautifully adorned dining room of the Night Court. The soft glow of candlelight danced on their faces, creating an atmosphere of warmth and camaraderie. Feyre and Rhysand were engaged in a lighthearted banter, their eyes filled with affection, while Mor, Amren, and Cassian laughed along, their spirits high. Nesta had her hand on Cassian's shoulder, and Elain was talking with Nuala. Aiden and Kai were sitting across from you, Kai's eyes trying to meet your own. Tonight would be the big night.

As the conversation lulled, your heart pounded in your chest, your hands clammy with nerves. Taking a deep breath, you gathered your courage, your voice slightly shaky but resolute, and cleared your throat to gain everyone's attention. Feyre's eyes met yours with a flash of concern, then understanding. You sent her an unsure smile and nodded slightly, notifying her that you were ready to share the news with your family.

"I... um, I have something important to share with all of you," you began, your eyes flickering with a mix of vulnerability and determination. You looked towards Kai and Aiden; both of them looked ecstatic, and you could tell Kai was reigning in his emotions. The room fell into an expectant silence as every member of the Inner Circle turned their gaze towards you, their expressions a blend of curiosity and concern.

Your eyes darted around the table, locking with each person's gaze, drawing strength from their unwavering support. You continued, "I'm pregnant."

The room erupted in a cacophony of reactions. Cassian's jaw dropped; a half-chewed bite of food forgotten in his mouth. Rhysand, startled by the unexpected news, coughed and choked on his wine, while Feyre, caught between annoyance and concern, hit his shoulder. She caught your eye and sent you a look that apologised for Rhys' behaviour.

"He doesn't mean it like that!" she mouthed. For the first time in your life, you hoped your expression betrayed your thoughts. "I'm sorry", you were trying to convey. "I love you". Feyre nodded once and smiled, and you knew she understood.

Mor was the first one to say something. She let out an excited gasp, clapping her hands together. "Y/n, that's amazing! You're going to be a wonderful mother," she exclaimed, her eyes shining with genuine joy.

You felt everyone else's eyes on you. Amren had narrowed her eyes, and Varian was looking quite uncomfortable. Oh dear.

You felt a bittersweet mixture of relief and apprehension wash over you as you glanced around the table, searching for comfort amidst the tumultuous sea of emotions. Everyone looked pleased though, it seemed the extra 5 seconds of processing time had done wonders. Even Amren had a slight smile on her face now, and Varian looked less... strange.

Rhys, having gathered himself now, spoke next, a beaming smile on his face. "I'm so happy for you, y/n! You and Azriel deserve this. How'd he take the news?"

You hesitated, your eyes dropping to your plate, tracing the intricate patterns etched onto the fine China. You could feel the glances of Feyre, Aiden and Kai on you.

"I... uh.... haven't told him yet," and then there was silence in the room again.

The weight of your words was sinking in for your friends.

"I don't want to get into it now, and- and ruin our evening," you said, voice shaking slightly. Perhaps you'd already ruined the evening, if the heavy silence was any indication. "But we haven't exactly been on the best terms lately. We were fighting all up until he left, and I- I can barely feel the bond anymore. He hasn't written me back in a month.

With that bomb dropped, you looked up to the ceiling, blinking away tears.

"I'm scared."

Cassian, recovering from his initial shock, reached across the table, placing a comforting hand on your trembling one. "We're here for you, y/n," he reassured you, his voice filled with sincerity and warmth. "And when Az comes back, we'll figure it out together. You won't be alone in this. I can't believe it. You're pregnant." He finished with a joyous laugh.

Aiden chimed in, "We love you, y/n. As long as we're here, you don't have to do anything alone."

"You have the best support system possible; one that has been formed through years of hardship. No bond is stronger than this group bond, y/n." Kai continued. "Your pregnancy will be a beautiful thing."

Nesta spoke up next. "You can count on us for anything, y/n/n. I know you must have concerns, but now you don't have to carry them alone." You sent her a grateful smile, to which she returned.

"It'll fly by, the 10 months. Enjoy the process. Plus, you'll look great with the pregnancy glow." Feyre laughed.

Then Elain cleared her throat - daintily, if that was possible. "I'm happy for you too, y/n. Your child is lucky to have you as a mother, and... I know we're not too close, but you can count on me." She smiled; her cheeks rosy as all the attention turned to her.

You were in shock. That was the most you'd ever heard Elain speak, especially in front of everyone. You reached across the table and lightly put your hand on hers.

Surprisingly, Amren said, "You're in capable hands, y/n. It'll be such a joy having another Nyx around." The table chuckled at her sarcasm, but you knew she meant it with no malice.

"That means more than you could know. Thank you, everyone."

"You know how Azriel is. He may draw back, but he is always there for the ones he loves and trust me when I say you're on the top of his list." Mor said. "I don't know how he'll react to the news,"

Your smile dropped a little. Thanks for the confidence boost, Mor.

"But I know that every relationship has its ups and downs. You've been there for him since the day you arrived, and he's been there for you, too. I can promise you that this experience will only help the two of you grow closer." Mor's words were sincere.

As the Inner Circle rallied around you, offering support, reassurance, and a safe space to share your fears and uncertainties, you felt a flicker of hope ignite within you. Even Varian had bowed his head in respect. In that moment, you realized that you were not alone in your journey. With your loved ones by your side, you knew you had the strength and resilience to face whatever lay ahead. When the time came to reveal the news to Azriel, they would help you navigate the delicate path, giving you the support and courage, you needed.

And so, amidst the clinking of cutlery, the sound of Feyre's exasperated sigh as Cerridwen chased after Nyx (who'd run into the room looking for his mother), and the warm laughter that filled the House of Wind's dining room, you embraced the love and acceptance that you had received, finding solace in the knowledge that no matter the challenges you faced, you would never have to face them alone.

You tugged on the bond once again. Once. Twice.

And then you felt it. A pull from Azriel. Stronger than you'd felt in months.

***

"You guys really didn't have to plan all this," you smiled fondly at your friends, who insisted on throwing you a baby shower. Feyre later told you that she spent almost an hour explaining the mortal concept to Amren and Cassian, the latter thinking it was about hygiene. It had almost been 3 weeks since you told your friends at that fateful dinner, and they had embraced your news with love and kindness, just as Aiden, Feyre and Kai all insisted they would.

"Nonsense, y/n. You deserve the best baby bath achievable." Cassian beamed.

"Shower, Cassian." Feyre reminded him.

"I just showered," Cassian rolled his eyes. Nesta slapped his shoulder, and he quickly stopped his jokes when she gave him a kiss. You suppressed a snicker as you watched her. Cassian looked at her so lovingly, and Nesta, however annoyed she may be, always returned that look with equal fierceness.

You looked to your High Lord and Lady. Rhysand was sitting in a plush armchair, and Feyre was perched on his lap, his hand draped across her waist, fingers fiddling with a loose thread on her cream sweater. Nyx's addition to their family had only made them closer, and you could only pray that your little one could provide the same effect.

It was obvious to a total fool that Varian was irrevocably in love with Amren. His gaze was constantly on her, his eyes soft and longing, as if he knew something everyone else didn't. Amren rarely shared personal stories with the Inner Circle, but maybe she'd told the prince of Adriata something she hadn't yet shared with everyone else. You had a feeling Amren was going to find her eternal happiness with him. After all, he was here casually lounging with the Night Court's elite Inner Circle, wasn't he?

Then you looked to the pile of presents that your closest friends had prepared for you. The pink and blue streamers your friends had pinned around the room. Feyre said she was incorporating another tradition into this baby shower, something called a 'gender reveal', that she said was a celebration where loved ones of the mother gathered so she could make the gender of her child known. The room laughed as Rhys recited some adorable thing Nyx had done that morning, and for a second you were just lost in the haze. These wonderful people had chosen to spend time with you, and all vowed to support you.

The baby shower and gender reveal passed in a blur. It was just a mess of happy memories. You opened and accepted everyone's gifts (even the sharp "toy" Amren had gifted for "teething purposes". Perhaps Azriel would like that one.), and Nuala, Cerridwen and Elain had done an amazing job with the cake, which had either pink or blue frosting inside.

Since you wanted Aiden to keep the gender a secret, you had no idea what colour was in the cake either, and you were equal parts excited yet slightly nervous. If you thought hearing your baby's heartbeat made it real, celebrating this moment with your friends made it unreal. This was truly, really, definitely, happening.

You cut into the cake and it was...

"Pink!" you exclaimed. "Pink! She's a girl!"

Your friends whooped and cheered, Feyre rushed up to hug you, and Cassian immediately bobbed down to your stomach.

"A baby girl! Aw," he cooed. "Uncle Cass is going to spoil you!"

You laughed at Cassian, but he had lifted the mood tremendously. You couldn't believe it. You were having a girl, and you knew she would be perfect.

After the celebrations, Kai came and found you flipping through a photo album. It had detailed most of your and Azriel's relationship, and now there was a chapter all about your pregnancy.

"Thinking about him?" Malakai asked.

You smiled sadly, thinking about the huge milestone you had just celebrated without him. "I can't help it. I miss my mate." and sent another tug down the bond.

This time, it wasn't reciprocated. Something felt different, this time. You almost thought you heard a cry of pain.

***

“You know, maybe it would help to get out of here a little,” Cassian said one day at training. You were in the middle of sparring with him and Nesta, sweat dripping down your face, but you could tell they were going easy since the birth of your daughter only 5 weeks prior.

"Yeah, y/n,” Nesta smiled as she thrusted the dagger upward. "No harm in a holiday, you work so hard."

You stopped, mid-jab into where Cassian's shoulder would've been as you considered the idea. You hadn't left the Night Court for leisure in over three decades, and a small part of you did long to explore the other courts. Back when you and Az still talked of the future, the two of you had dreamed of holidaying in all the seven courts.

>>>>

"Do you ever think of the future?" you asked, playing with your mate's hair. Azriel paused his reading and thought.

He hummed softly, replying, "Of course, one with you."

You smiled, hands resuming their tousling of Azriel's hair, "I think one day I would like to travel. See all the places that the stories told me about when I was younger."

"That sounds perfect," Azriel replied, now fully sitting up and facing you. His book was discarded, and his hands were drifting up and down your arms. "I am content everywhere with you, but I hear the Winter and Summer courts are especially beautiful year-round."

You made a noise of happiness. "How much wine do you think we would need to buy Rhys for him to gift us one of his luxurious holiday homes in the Winter Court?"

Azriel's laugh ricocheted through the empty house, "My darling mate, I bet it's more wine than we can afford."

You laughed softly, "Well, I guess we better start saving. When I mend relations with Spring and Autumn, we must visit all the courts! Oh, just imagine it, Az."

Azriel's eyes softened. "Have I ever told you how much I admire you?"

You tilt your head, "You tell me every day, Az, but I think I admire you more." you said in a whisper, as if it were a secret, but how could it ever be, with a mate like Azriel?

Azriel smiled but shook his head. "Your job is amazing, y/n. Co-ordinating all these alliances, responding to our people's concerns and solving their problems. Velaris would really be nowhere without you."

You blush under Azriel's heated gaze, and say, "Well, someone's got to make the bribe money for Rhys' wine."

Azriel laughed deeply, the sound warming your soul. "Well, good thing I make up for my immense lack of income with other skills."

You watched the corner of Azriel's mouth curl up in a smirk. "Wouldn't you agree, my love? Or would you like a reminder?"

>>>>>>>>

When you named your daughter, you cried.

Cerise. Cerise Beatrice Singer.

Beatrice was your mother's name. A mortal name. She was half fae, as her mother was mortal. The courts gossiped for your entire childhood, from when you were six up until at least seventeen. They didn't even stop when she died. Seventeen was the year where you couldn't take it anymore. The year you finally left your 'family' and fled into the centre of Prythian. You travelled around from court to court for 2 years until one day, you arrived in the Night Court.

The people of your old village called her horrible names. They'd hiss at your mother as she walked across the street, throw all sorts of things at her. They were horrified that a mortal walked the streets of Prythian freely, no matter the fact she had never actually been in the Mortal Lands. No matter the fact she grew up the same as them. No matter the fact that she learnt the same faerie customs in the same faerie schools. No matter the fact that she grew up eating faerie food and wearing faerie-produced clothing.

No matter any of that.

Once, there was a rumour that you heard at school. People were saying your mother used witchcraft to lure herself a man "as great as that scum's father". You hid behind a wall, eavesdropping. The voices were muffled, the pitch all weird, but it was clear they were talking about you. Aiden was there with you. When he saw you were on the verge of tears, he told you to cover your ears and he hugged you tight. But even his hugs were never as tight as your mother's.

You are remembering thinking that you had never heard such foul language coming from 11-year-old children. You had dared a peek into the classroom, and when you saw the towering figures huddled, you realised. It was the teachers. The teachers using slurs and the teachers belittling the one woman who actually cared about you. About everything.

Decades from that day you thought of your past. You thought that, maybe it was true that once, your father had felt love for her. Beatrice bore him 4 children, after all. You knew your mother married him soon after meeting, and when she would brush your hair, back when you were young and the world was simple, she would tell you stories about how he courted her. Oh, how he courted her. Before the age of eight you used to wish for a love story like theirs. But as you grew up, it was plain to see that he felt nothing for her. In the end, one of your father's drunken rages had led to her death, and she died protecting you.

She cared for you when no one else did, in your family. Not your older siblings, and certainly not your father.

When you named your daughter, you cried.

Love and passion. That's what her name meant.

You were going to make sure love was all she felt from her family. Cerise was going to grow up with love. You loved her, your true family loved her, and Azriel would love her. You were sure.

Her raven hair was just like his, her eyes were like his too. Sometimes a piercing green, sometimes a calming brown. Beautiful, just like her father. She had your mouth though; Feyre had told you. When she smiled it was like the sun brightening the sky after a storm, and you had never seen anything better. She loved to laugh, her small eyes crinkling at the corners, her nose twitching. She was beautiful.

Cerise, she had wings. Small, baby Illyrian wings, but wings none the less. Wings like Azriel. Not wings like your father, but wings like Azriel. Majestic and powerful, with the ability to give what you had lacked; freedom.

>>>>>>>>

It had almost been 9 months since you told your friends at that fateful dinner, and they had spared no expense, treating you and Cerise like royalty.

Feyre could tell you were drained from your new motherly duties and said she would be happy to take care of your daughter for as long as you needed, but you had refused her offer.

"Oh no, Feyre, that's so kind," you smiled gratefully at your friend. "It's okay though, I will pick a place suitable for the both of us."

You had picked up Cerise from eager Auntie Mor's that morning and had decided. It was time for a holiday.

Feyre's eyes were scanning your face, waiting to pounce on any sign of hesitation. "Besides," you continued. "You have Nyx to think about!"

Upon hearing her son's name, Feyre beamed. "Yes! Oh y/n, I am so excited to have them grow up together." Her eyes softened. "It may seem hard now, but I know you'll be a great mother."

You reached for your friend and pulled her into a hug. "Thank you, Feyre. I learn from the best."

When you pulled back Feyre grasped your hands, grinning excitedly. "Now for the fun part. Let's pick a holiday destination; where are we sending you!"

Rhys walked in about an hour after you and Feyre decided to research to find Prythian's best Court for a vacation.

"How about the Day Court?" He suggested. "Helion loves you, and I'm sure both you and your daughter would enjoy the sunshine."

You looked at Feyre who was beaming.

"That sounds perfect."

That's how you ended up holding your daughter, watching as Helion - ever the show-off - had insisted you fly to the Day Court in his finest white carriage, led by the horses with manes of flame. When Rhys had heard about this plan, he just rolled his eyes, telling you that once, he had banned Helion from coming into the Night Court in that carriage, but Helion's loophole was to take you out of the Night Court in it.

"Go easy on the flying, okay? You have a post-partum mother and a baby on board," you said to Helion, only half-joking.

Helion raised one dark eyebrow at you in reply. "Of course. I promise you a mellow ride." He smiled and turned his attention back to his horses. A quick tug on the reigns from Helion, and the three of you were gone.

@ladyescapism 💗💗

edit: I ONLY JUST REALISED I DONT USE READ MORE OMLLLL

edit 2: WEDDING VOWELS LMFAO

[violetasteracademic]

So, while I am a passionate Elriel and my experience is only further cemented with each new detail on every re-read, I have still stated since day one that I still love Lucien and Gwyn! My first ever Tumblr post was a dissertation on Lucien for goodness sake!

And this is where I struggle. I don't personally lurk in anti posts, but they make their way to my eyeballs anyways. And my problem is that myself, and many Elriel's I know, still love all the characters and honor and fully believe they will have their own stories, potentially their own POVs in future books or at the very least play a large role in ACOTAR or the multiverse.

But the a/ti Elriel's, from what I've seen, are almost ALWAYS a/ti Elain. I won't bother going over the comments I get on tiktok from E/ucien shippers that claim they like Elain. They erase her. They misunderstand her. They minimize her. They sideline her. They invent villain storylines. And still ship her with their favorite male character? Just because they want *him* to have his mate. And Azriel is apparently bio hazard waste in all areas of life EXCEPT if he decides to go after Gwyn. Whereas I like Azriel as he is, and I like who he currently wants to be with.

The author, I am certain, also likes these characters. She wrote them. It's difficult to believe her intention was for the fans to turn on Azriel just because a reveal many of us saw coming (that he is down bad for Elain) happened.

I don't have to erase Gwyn from the narrative, or distort her interactions with Azriel, minimize Gwyn's importance, create a shitty personality for her or invent a new storyline to make Elriel make sense.

I don't have to erase Lucien from the narrative, distort his interactions with Elain, call him toxic, minimize his importance, or invent a new storyline for Elriel to make sense.

I personally can't wait to see what Lucien and Gwyn are going to bring to the story. But by and large, I mostly see Gwyn as being a sidekick to Azriel and Nesta instead of the lead of her own story or Elain as a sidekick to the Band of Exiles instead of the lead of her own story for G/ynriel and E/ucien theories to come together. Beyond that, I'd love to look into their stories more, but I'm tired of assaulting my eyeballs with all the toxic sludge about pelvises and pure hatred from Elain festering in those spaces.

So I'll say it again and I'll say it a million times, just because Azriel and Elain want each other and not Lucien and Gwyn does NOT mean I think Lucien and Gwyn are trash. I just want the characters who want each other to be together. If it were written differently, I would feel differently. And if antis would at least address that Azriel and Elain WANT each other instead of trying to explain away their behavior and invent false intentions and narratives, I'd have a lot more fun reading and exploring their theories.

I'm an Elain girl first and foremost. And I want her to have what she wants. As of right now, today, waking up in Prythian, that is Azriel. That is the only thing on page. Anything else is speculation or theorizing. Azriel and Elain wanting each other is not a theory. It's real. Erasing it is not only bizarre, but makes any statement coming after it really not credible.

I ship a ton of non canon couples in other fandoms. Many of them never came to pass. It's just for fun. But because the hatred for Elain is so visceral, and the desire to erase her character from existence is so real, these ships are not fun. And I genuinely wish they were.

The awful bullying and atrocious behavior and weird hatred for the books and characters in this fandom gets me down some days. Sorry for the wallowing. Love you all 😘

[nikethestatue]

Not a question, just a statement. I honestly don’t really care about a ship war. I think everyone is allowed to interpret and root for whoever they want. But what I don’t understand, past so many cannon signs, is how people genuinely believe that the next book could be Azriels. Let alone Gwyn. At the end of ACOWAR, we end with Feyre and Rhys flying in the sky, a gift of being together. It’s their conclusion as the main couple in the series. The next book is a NOVELLA. Novellas are always books that either are prequels (like assassin blade for example) or a change in direction for a series. The latter is ACOFAS. We still have Feyre and Rhys POVs because they will always be main characters, but we begin to hear the voices of other characters: Mor, Cassian and Nesta. This is not an accident. It’s laying down the ground work for the rest of the series. Specifically, we see Nesta and cassian begin their journey of reluctant mates. And the beginning of Nestas story of healing and growth. We also see Cassian’s care for the women in Illyria not training. We also see some things about Mor (like her estate) that we never saw in the plot. We also see a glimpse in to what might have happened with Eris. Could this be in terms of her past, powers and love life? What else do we see in ACOFAS? The continuation of Elain and Lucien not having a connection, and we actually see Lucien and hear from his own mouth about being in the Band of Exiles. What else do we see? Azriel stating he doesn’t spy on Lucien (and he’s a spymaster?? With him saying it’s an invasion of Elain’s privacy: with RHYS thinking it’s more just not to know what they are doing) and then the taking of the plate scene with Azriel being upset with his brother for not waiting for Elain. We see her give Az the headache powder, and him having such a joyous laugh that Feyre never heard before. His eyes being bright. Them sitting and going over the garden plans at three in the morning when everyone else is going to bed. What else do we see? Az not wagering on Lucien coming to solstice while looking out of the window at the garden. What else? Cassian not wanting to wager on women training consistently in Illyria. What else? Amren telling Feyre that Elain has her own problems to focus on, with a pointed look. I could LITERALLY go on. This novella that people give a 3 star rating and saying that is boring is FILLED with plot starting events. Let’s look at ACOSF:

what happens:

Nesta is lost in her trauma and mental health issues

She is forced to train with Cassian, or be sent to the human realms and is sent to the House of Wind

Cassian and Nesta become physical, but there is still that emotional boundary, even though we all know there is something there. THEY also know something is there. Reluctant mates.

who comes into the plot? ERIS. We still don’t know what happened with Mor, but he becomes more visible in the plot. Which was shown in ACOFAS through Mor when she goes to the court of nightmares. She talks about it.

what else happens? The valkayie. A women specific training plot. An an Illyrian women (emerie) comes into play. And she ALSO was in ACOFAS mind you.

Lucien and the band of exiles are in this book as well, and we see cassian’s account of the dynamic between the three of them.

we also see Az being more aloof than usual, and cassian mentions this several times. He sees him brooding way more. And he specifically mentions how he doesn’t need to buffer Mor and Az anymore like he used to. That Az seems to have finally given up after 500 years

we get INTRODUCTED to Gwyn here. Note how she was NOT in ACOFAS? Emrie was, because she feeds into the Illyria plot here. Gwyn has a specific plot of being Nesta’s friend. And also just a bad ass women who overcomes such terrible events in her life to become a true warrior. And to become nesta’s first true friend. People forget that Feyre has Mor and Amren, Elain has Nuala and Cerriwden (sorry if that’s wrong) and Nesta FINALLY has two friends. And how many is in each? 3. Just like the bat boys and the band of exiles. Like Lucien also finally gets 2 friends. (Also want to point out. Notice how Feyres two friends involve Rhys? How Nesta and cassian are involved in training with the Valkaryie? Does this allude to Elains relationship with the wraiths being a connection to Az? Does the band of exiles mean something for Lucien? That’s up to interpretation).

what happens at last? Nesta and Cassian stop fighting their feelings and become mates.

what else happens? The plot around the troves and koschei thickens. And Elain starts to push that she is willing to help the IC. Building into her own book…? Ya. Literally. Not to mention the plot with Koschei that also has Azriel involved “I was waiting to meet you” vibes.

so where did so many of these plot points come from? Literally from the little boring novella that people want to skip over. It’s the literal building blocks for the rest of the ACOTAR series… and I’m totally missing points in it as well. These are JUST off the top of my head. And I read ACOFAS last year lol. The next book is Elains book. And the novellas? Could be Mor or Gwyn or Lucien. It could be Vassa as well.. But the main plot revolves around the sisters and the bat boys. There’s so much cannon that makes it hard to imagine that it won’t be Elain and Az next. But I don’t even wanna go there. I don’t hate any of these characters. They are all literally so flawed, that if we are only looking at flaws, we should hate them all. If we can all go from hating Nesta to having a better understanding at bare minimum or even LIKING her.. then why not for Elain? Since the beginning it’s clear that Elain has been undervalued and not considered. Being she is seen as weak. Always just deemed the pretty useless one. Like she is an SEER. Something just as rare as a shadow singer. And SJM has continuously implied she will not put women against each other. I really loved Gwyns role in Nesta’a story, and I’m not ruling out her being a lightsinger (because why else was that even brought up in ACOSF?? And why does she bring up singing with Az?? Because he’s a shadow singer? Doesn’t seem necessary unless it alludes to something. Nothing is random for SJM). BUT if she isn’t, then I’m still glad we got to see her. I think a telling sign, past the bonus, is that Gwyn went back to the library. If the next book was going to focus on her, she would not be going back. She would be moving forward. But she isn’t ready.. training or not. And that’s OKAY. She could still be a part of the plot, which might be implied in her being in the bonus. But the bonus takes place in the middle of the book mind you. And tbh I PERSONALLY feel it is to add to the plot in a lightsinger way. But that’s just my own interpretation. You can have your own if you want! And like she went through a fucking lot. The next book is clearly Elains journey, which involves Az and Lucien. And in that, it involves Vassa and Koschei.

so anyways, sorry for the super long rant. But I hope this makes sense to people? The ship war can be fun, but I think we seriously need to stop being so mean to people just because they envision a different person with one of the main characters. In all honesty, I trust SJM to follow through on whoever Elain is with. Who Az is with.Who Lucien is with. Who Gwyn is with. Who Mor is with. Who Emerie is with. And even who Eris is with. She is the CREATOR of these characters. And we can speculate, but in the end she truly knows what’s best. She hasn’t been wrong yet… even Amren and Varian is cute as fuck lol. So anyways. Thank you for reading. And let’s all just be happy we get some time in this world!!!

But that's why the other side specifcially HATES ACOFAS and actually recommends skipping it because 'there is nothing there. It's a Christmas Special'.

Whereas, as you said, Anon, ACOFAS is a blueprint for what would be happening going forward and the future stories.

When it comes to Elriel, we see Lucien being the point of contention between them, so we know that this will be addressed and would play a significant part in the book. We know that the Elriel relationship would probably come as a surprise to many and that it will start secretly. Kind of under everyone's noses, but also people keep missing the signs. I think the biggest misinterpreter of signs will be Rhys, because he, again and again, presents a narrow POV which is completely misaligned with what is happening around him. I think there is also something to be said about Rhys really not knowing his closest friends and confidants--I think that that needs to be dealt with as well.

Yes, I think it's fun to ship, but i think there needs to be some logical foundation to shipping and basic understanding of text. There is a logical flow to books and then there is crackshipping. I've noticed that in this fandom, crackshipping has become an art form. People start believing in their own theories a little too much.

Like SJM went and killed Sigrid in the fist 1/3 of the book, whereas we spent so much time on her in HOSAB. Who is to say she won't do the same with Gwyn? I think unless it's a main, readers need to be cautious with their wild theories and their excessive confidence.

[dragoneyes618]

Random Guardians of Ga'Hoole Headcanons I Have That I May Or May Not Have Posted Here Already

Noctus and Marella suspected that Kludd was behind the disappearance of Soren and Eglantine, but they didn't do anything because 1. they were afraid of him and his friends (the Pure Ones) who stopped by whenever they were out hunting, and 2. he was still their son and they loved him and they didn't want to believe he was capable of killing his siblings.

Kludd didn't push Eglantine out of the nest like he did to Soren. A couple of Pure Ones just stopped by one day and took her straight out of the nest. Kludd told his parents and Mrs. Plithiver that she'd fallen and probably been eaten by something.

Kludd killed Noctus and Marella, or at the very least was involved in their deaths. (This might be implied canon, I don't remember.)

The rogue smith, who was also an informant for the Great Tree, who the Band found dying in The Journey, was killed by the Pure Ones because he refused to make weapons for them. (This might also be implied canon.) He was killed before he could get word to the Great Tree about the new evil rising in the owl kingdoms.

Otulissa's parents and aunt were picked off by St. Aggie's forces, who were attempting to kill as many adult owls in the region as they could, in the hopes that when they came for the owlets and eggs the nests would be nearly undefended. Fortunately Luckily for Otulissa, a Ga'Hoole patrol found her first.

Silver and Smutty are brothers.

Eglantine was haunted for the rest of her life by the events of The Shattering; the betrayal of an owl she believed to be her best friend, the lost hope that her parents were alive, her being essentially mind-controlled. She has nightmares.

Bell was haunted for the rest of her life by the events of Exile; her father's exile, the vanity cult, the book burnings, the owl burnings, the Striga - an owl who had once saved her life and who she saw as a trusted mentor - threatening to kill her, the loss of Otulissa's eye. She blames herself for all this, since she brought the Striga to the Great Tree. She also has nightmares.

Sometimes, Bell and Eglantine talk about this.

Between Exile and the War of the Ember, Coryn and Bell had a talk about owls you trust (in her case, a trusted mentor, in his case, his own mother) betraying you.

Eglantine always wanted a mate and owlets of her own (she especially wanted to name owlets after her parents) but she never found the right owl to become mates with. She compensated for this by being the best aunt ever to her nephew and nieces.

Pelli is 401-2.

Soren and Gylfie had nightmares about St. Aggie's for the rest of their lives. To their dying day, the sight of the full moon made them uneasy.

[sarcasticassian]

the first time Steve sees them he hasn’t realised yet that his window opens all the way and he can crawl out onto the roof so he hears them first, Love Shack is playing loudly and when he peers out of the window he can see a horrible, beat up old Cadillac, Steve always thought they were sort of ugly but it suits the weird trio sitting in it and this weird beach town too, the roof is down and there’s a girl sat in the back, she has short hair that brushes her shoulders, her clothes like kind of grungy in a cool way and her head is currently thrown back in a loud laugh, there’s a blonde girl sat in the passenger seat, twisted around to talk to the other girl, she’s in a summer dress and it sounds like the song might’ve been her choice, it suits her, finally there’s a guy driving, he has long curly hair, he’s wearing a cropped band shirt from what Steve can see and he’s also laughing, Steve feels a stab of jealousy that they get to enjoy their day and a summer at the beach, he goes back to laying on his bed and feeling sorry for himself

the next time Steve sees them he’s figured out the window latch and he’s sat on the roof wallowing, he’s realised that his dad was being serious about his summer exile before he goes to work for him or go to college, Steve isn’t sure if he’s been accepted into any because their mail hasn’t been rerouted here, if he knew this is where he’d have ended up Steve wouldn’t have let Tommy kiss him but there’s the beat up car again, the roof still down and this time Should I Stay or Should I Go is blasting, the three from before are there again but this time there’s another girl squished into the back with them, she has dark curly hair and Steve wonders if her and the first boy are related, this time there’s another boy in the passenger seat, he has straight brown hair and a beige, plain t shirt on, Steve watches them all hop out the car and head down to the beach

the third time he sees them there’s no girls and another guy who has incredible hair, it’s long and even from the roof Steve can see that it’s soft, the new boy is wearing a bright hawaiian shirt and this time Pass the Dutchie is playing quieter than the music usually is and as they hop out the guy with the short, straight hair staggers slightly and they all start to laugh as they slowly start the walk to the beach

Call Me hails the arrival of the sad, little car next time, it’s just the curly haired pair this time, Steve thinks they’re both the most attractive of the bunch but he doesn’t have anybody to tell, the pair don’t get out of the car straight away and Steve watches the guy gesticulate wildly, the girl nods along, rolls her eyes in some parts and they talk for a little longer, then they get out the car, the guy always just hops over his door instead of opening it, Steve thinks its insanely attractive for some reason and maybe the guy takes the top spot for the best looking in this weird group of people

the next time it’s the same guy and girl again (Steve briefly wonders if they’re a couple) but this time Running Up That Hill is playing and there’s a small army of children squashed into the back seat together, all talking loudly and immediately legging it to the beach once the car stops, the guy yells and takes off after them, the girl following more slowly after she picks up a book from the car, later that day the guy with the short hair turns up in his own car and when they all come back he has his arm wrapped around the girl whilst the curly haired guy carries a redhead on his back before he dumps her into the back of his car

this carries on for a couple more weeks, usually just the ugly Cadillac and who Steve assumes is the owner, the curly haired guy, along with a rotation of seemingly random teenagers, Steve can’t figure out what they have in common, none of them have similar styles, except maybe the curly haired brunette and the small, strawberry blonde girl, the music clashes horribly from person to person and Steve is pretty sure it’s never the curly haired guys choice because he seems to grumble at the particularly poppy choices, Steve is curious but he knows he can’t leave so he watches them from a distance, he longing deep within him, he wants to laugh like that, have friends like they all seem to be, he resigns himself to a summer of people watching and hating his parents but as the summer stretches on he realises that this is just going to be his life at this point, always on the outskirts and always dissatisfied 

the next day the car pulls up, Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy is cut off halfway through a chorus and he looks down to see the grungy short haired girl and the cute curly haired guy looking up at him, he lets out a squeak of embarrassment at being caught and looks away but then they’re shouting

“Hey!” “Hey you on the roof!” The girl is waving her arms frantically and the guy is grinning up at him, Steve looks around as if there is anybody else on the roof with him then waves back shyly, the girl hoots and scrambles to get out the car, the boy following her

“Come down! We see you up there all the time, come down and hang out!”

“I can’t!”

“Why not?”

“Not allowed!”

The guy takes a step back to assess the side of the house, he leans over to point something out to the girl then he’s taking a running leap at the building, he manages to haul himself up until his head is popping up over the edge of the roof and Steve quickly helps him up by grabbing his hand, it’s calloused and warm and Steve doesn’t want to let go but he does

“Come on Rob, it’s not that hard!”

“You know I can’t control my limbs!”

But she eventually clambers up and rolls onto the roof, panting and groaning but perking up once she’s face to face with Steve

“I’m Robin, this is Eddie.”

“I’m Steve.”

and suddenly Steve’s summer doesn’t look so bleak

[freddie-77-ao3]

So I know you like Marvel, DC, and Percy Jackson, but what other shows, movies, or genres to you like??? Action, horror, comedy, crime/medical dramas? If you don’t mind me asking that is .

hmmmm

so DC and PJO are definitely the big ones, and have been for years but other than that

Miss Peregrine's Home/ Peculiar Children series

greys anatomy with my sister (but i refuse to watch past season 14, there was NO reason to keep going

the owl house? a little? i still read the moringmark comics and am on the subreddit, but i'm not really active in the fandom. same goes for gravity falls. OH I NEED TO POST A GRAVITY FALLS THING ITS COOL AS SHIT!!!

throne of glass (sarah j. maas series) i love this series but oh my fucking god the fandom sucked when i was last in it. absolutely no understanding of any sort of morally gray character. i adore characters who are human and make mistakes, and from what i saw.... no one else did.

sort of merlin tv but also.... just the fanfics. i watched the first season of the actual show and then it got removed from netflix so i just read the fandom wiki and fanfiction. got into it originally because caffeinatedflumadiddle (SOSF writer) also wrote for merlin.

umbrella academy!! TV more than comics but i definitely like both. TV wise, i've not actually watched season 3 yet, but imma get there at some point.

love the true lives of the fabulous killjoys comics, don't really read the fics bc ppl conflate the fabulous four with the band and that's ick.

heartstopper! my ex gf got me into the series, but i definitely still love them now!! personally i like the show, then the novels (like solitaire!!! god i love solitaire), then the graphic novels. i love nick and Charlie (obviously) but tao is my favorite non-main character. non main being not-nick-or-charlie.

dear evan hansen. not like. a lot a lot, but i like the fics, the book was cool. not watched the musical, but listened to the songs.

hunger games!! controversial opinion but i don't really thing gale did much wrong? like he designed bombs WHILE THEY WERE IN WAR. what happened to prim was a tragedy, but one that was accidental. definitely still team everlark though.

derry girls! watch it (and rewatch it) with my family a lot. my favorite is michelle.

love both the song of achilles and circe by madeline miller, even if they're not historically accurate (moreso the circe there...) honestly, love a lot of mythological retellings-- daughters of sparta is another really good one.

speechless (tv) is great! watched it mainly for the nonverbal rep, ray is definitely my favorite character. fun fact, my mum was in a mums group with minnie driver.

everything's gonna be okay! also watched for rep (this time just autism in general) and also love it. drea is my favorite character.

coraline!!! holy shit i love coraline. book and movie. favorite animated movie by far.

my sister's keeper is a great book. not watched the movie, but i love the book.

girl in pieces is a great book.

i watched fate the winx saga, that was good

school spirits!! can't wait for season 2

okay also, nonfiction/poetry wise

i adore richard siken. he's a wonderful poet. i like crush more than war of the foxes, and i can't wait for the next collection to come out!! seriously ask me about his poetry, i could go on for ages-- i've got favorite quotes, favorite poems, everything.

black girl, call home (and other poems by the author) jasmine mans is great. i am white, so disclaimer there, i probably shouldn't speak as to the racial poetry, but i definitely enjoy her queer and sexual assualt poetry.

a couple of others i can't pull up rn

night by elie wiesel. genuinely guys, usually i don't like nonfiction, but i read this book for english nine YEARS ago, and it was such a beautiful book that i bought it when the unit was over. it's absolutely horrific, but.

radium girls by kate moore. was my special interest for years and years and years, and still definitely a comfort book.

genres?

honestly for books i just wander through barnes and noble and see what strikes my fancy

it really depends on my mood, like, i have tv shows/movies for background noise while i do homework/chores, tv shows/movies for when i'm trying to fall asleep, ones to watch with other people, ones to watch by myself...

i like watching a lot of documentaries. on Netflix, i recommend keep sweet pray and obey, brain on fire, athlete a, the volcano: rescue from whaakari, and take care of maya. also, i can't remember the name, but the boston marathon massacre one.

also, hannah gadsby? great comedian 10/10 recommend. i've loved the shows since the first came out in 2018. not watched the most recent ones yet. also rec the book.

i guess mainly action and fantasy. and then documentaries, and sometimes medical dramas.

medical drama wise i've watched greys anatomy, house, new amsterdam, parts of the good doctor, and the first couple of episodes of scrubs.

OH FOR MY BOOK PEOPLE IF YOU'RE EVER IN CHICAGO, GO TO EXILE IN BOOKVILLE ITS WONDERFUL!!

everytime i go to chicago i go to exile in bookville. if yall want the website link,

sorry this got so over the top lol

[acourtofthought]

I don’t really get involved with the Elain ship wars, but I think both sides - especially elucien shippers - seem to miss the point about an emerging theme in Elain’s story; and that is the importance of choice.

Throughout the entirety of Elain’s life, people have always made choices for her. Growing up, that was Nesta - always protecting Elain, and always speaking on her behalf. Later on, even though it was clear that Elain wanted to marry Graysen and live a normal, mortal life - that choice was also taken away from her, as she was forced to become fae and live in Prythian. Then, throughout the entirety of ACOWAR and beyond, we witness Nesta, Feyre and Rhys (as well as multiple other characters) speak about Elain‘s wants and needs, without actually consulting her.

The cherry on top, is a mating bond that Elain clearly doesn’t want. The absolute antithesis of choice, is forcing Elain to be with someone - just because a Cauldron (the same magical object that took away her mortal body and mortal life in the first place) said so. We even see Elain outwardly express her distaste at the situation;

“He brought you a present.” Those doe-brown eyes turned toward me. Sharper than I’d ever seen them. “And that entitles him to my time, my affections?” “No.” I blinked. “But he is a good male.” Despite our harsh words. Despite this Band of Exiles bullshit. “He cares for you.” “He doesn’t know me.” “You don’t give him the chance to even try to do so.” Her mouth tightened, the only sign of anger in her graceful countenance. “I don’t want a mate.“

And sure, I get that you and other elucien’s will argue that Elain will simply change her mind, and will fall in love with Lucien in later books. But, I personally think that if Elain suddenly has a change of heart, and does indeed follow the Cauldron’s wish and accepts the mating bond - then no matter how beautiful she and Lucien could be together, it’s a complete reversal of this theme that SJM has set up. If Elain ends up with Lucien because a higher power is pulling her towards him - is it really Elain’s choice, or the Cauldron’s?

And yes, Feyre and Rhys, Nesta and Cassian, Rowan and Aelin, Hunt and Bryce - are all mates, and all have beautiful relationships. But the fundamental difference between these couples and Elain and Lucien, is that they all had the chance to get to know one another before the mating bond snapped into place. And even though some of these couples hated each other in the beginning (ie. Rowan and Aelin), hate is still an intense emotion, there’s passion and fire mixed into it - something more. With Elain and Lucien… there’s nothing. It’s very lacking - Elain seemingly feels indifferent towards him. It just doesn’t feel like the start of an epic SJM romance - especially when Elain is fully aware of the mating bond with Lucien, yet is kissing another man while he’s in the same house. How many other endgame couples kissed another person after becoming aware of the mating bond…?

And let’s not forget Elain’s connection to Blodeuwedd - a connection that you appear to be aware of, given your posts and theories on the matter. But Blodeuwedd’s story closely aligns with Elain’s; she is forced to marry a man that she has no affections for, so she ends up running away with another. The entire premise of the Blodeuwedd folklore is about having autonomy to choose your own life - including the person you love.

And, Blodeuwedd certainly didn’t just wake up one day and decide that she actually wants to be with Llew - the man she was forced to marry. That would be a complete reversal of the narrative. I’m not sure why you expect the same of Elain.

I can see Elain and Lucien being good friends, but I think SJM has better plans for both of them. Plans that involve them both choosing a love they deserve.

"How many other endgame couples kissed another person before becoming aware of the Mating Bond?"

That little excerpt right there is Nesta talking to Cassian. No, she may not have known what it meant but it was a feeling beyond her control.

From the second she met Cassian, she knew he was something to her. Just as from the second Elain looked in Lucien's eyes for the first time, she knew he was something to her.

Nesta was willing to die for Cassian in ACOWAR, a proclamation of her feelings yet she still chose to sleep with many other males after that. Because she was angry. Because she was struggling to adjust to everything that had happened. So she pretended she didn't want the very thing she was drawn to, something she couldn't stop herself from feeling. She, with an awareness of her feelings for Cassian (feelings she never asked for or decided for herself) chose to have sex with multiple other men. Which is a whole lot more than almost kissing just one.

And you claim Elain doesn't want a Mating Bond but please point me in the direction of where it says Nesta ever wanted a Mating Bond with Cassian. In fact, Nesta even tells us "husband" was as good as it got and that she specifically doesn't like the thought of a Mating Bond because it means parting with the last of her humanity.

Elain was in love with Graysen and engaged when she lost her humanity and the bond snapped into place. The girl is allowed to have a rebound / crush before making another lifelong decision.

And isn't it possible that if Nesta made the choices she did out of fear despite being drawn to Cassian, we might come to find out that Elain is saying what she says and doing what she's done because she too is afraid of being drawn to Lucien? Imagine thinking you know love with one person, being ready to marry them, then instantly feeling something more powerful than you could have imagined for another? That's going to be an overwhelming feeling, it's going to leave you questioning what you thought you knew and it's going to take some time before you're ready to face some hard truths.

"Throughout the entirety of Elain's life, people have made choices for her"

Hmmmm, I guess Nesta knew a little something about that too. Yet she still learned to fully embrace being Fae, Cassian, and her Mating Bond. Despite that she didn't have a choice in what happened to her or being drawn to him from the moment they met.

Not to mention no one is making choices for Elain that she's ever argued against (until SF). Of course being kidnapped and put into the Cauldron wasn't her choice but it wasn't Nesta's either. It wasn't Feyre's choice to be kidnapped by Tamlin in book 1. And none of the sisters decided their mother should die or they'd go into poverty. Those things were a result of misfortune and not a choice or lack of choice.

Please give me one example of where Elain was told by friends or family "you will do this" to which Elain replied, "I will not" to which the other person responded, "I don't care, you're doing it anyway" and they forced her to do it. Elain has had just as much agency as any other character. The only things that weren't her choice are the exact same things every other person in the series has dealt with. It wasn't Rhys's choice to be tricked by Amarantha, it wasn't Mor's choice to have a nail put in her, it wasn't Lucien's choice to have Jesminda murdered or be SA by Ianthe or beaten by Tamlin or Feyre's choice to be locked up by Tamlin.

These arguments about choice in regards to relationships make me laugh because picking Lucien is still a choice. Is someone holding a sword to her head? Telling her she has to pick Lucien? Since the answer to that is no, the argument holds no weight.

Elain and Lucien are basically a friend setting them up on a double date after divorce because "They'd be perfect together!" Elain can decide, "no, I'm not ready for a double date" and refuse. But she could also take a little time to do her own thing, realize she's past the crappy Tinder dates then finally agree to that double date and realize how amazing Lucien is.

I made some poor dating choices in my youth too and hated the guys my mother would have preferred I end up with. But eventually I matured, realized why the guys I dated weren't working out to well for me and ended up dating someone my mother adores. But for awhile, I of course knew better than her because what teenager / young adult doesn't? Turns out, she knew a little something about quality dating material and I was just too stubborn to accept it.

That's Elain and Fate is her parent. She's refusing to accept that Lucien is not only a choice but the right choice for her because she needs to prove no one can tell her what to do. And that's fine for now but with her emotional growth will come maturity and the awareness that Lucien is her Mate for a reason.

I also like how you conveniently left off:

If she could change her mind on not wanting a male, then why couldn't she again change her mind on wanting a Mate?

You know why Rhys's parents weren't a match?

Elain is absolutely soft and fiery at times and well liked by pretty much everyone but who is more cold and vicious? Lucien or Az? Rhys's parents weren't a match because their personalities were too different. Canonically, Elain and Lucien are extremely similar in their values, their interests, and how they handle conflict.

And I think you're missing the point of the fairytale.....

Blodeuwedd was about her being upset over not having a choice yes, but..... She was punished for the choice she did make, choosing to cheat on Llew (Lucien). And the part Az plays in the fairytale ended up getting him murdered by Llew.

And SJM doesn't do literal retellings, she samples from lore and fairytale and gives them a happy ending so her "Blodeuwedd" could end up realizing that sometimes things that happen to us are actually the best things for us.

These are fantasy books and they're less about the character proving "ain't nobody gonna tell me what I can do" and more about them learning to accept their Fates. By accepting their Fates, it sets into motion the chain of events which help them save their world.

Rhys suspected Feyre was his mate before he ever laid eyes on her and the bond snapped before he and Feyre were friends. Cassian suspected Nesta's was his Mate too which is the reason he kept holding his hand out to a literal stranger who seemingly wanted nothing to do with him.

Are their love story's less beautiful because they knew what those females were to them from the very start?

The mating bond has nothing to do with anything. The mating bond is someone, aka Fate saying, "Hey! I know this person and I think you'd be well matched!" The journey is the character then deciding when they're ready to consider Fates suggestion to see if Fate was right. And that's the thing Anti Elucien's can't seem to grasp. Because at some point Elain will get to know Lucien, even if it's just to see if they could be friends. But when they are two characters who are written as being extremely compatible in all the ways it counts, there's very little chance love won't be quick to follow.

Lucien is still a choice. The point is making the choice for the right reasons and not JUST because they have a bond. And when you look at the things Elain stands for then look at who Lucien is, it's very clear how well matched they are.