#there are unrelated lookalikes all over the world and across multiple generations man

[see-arcane]

the scene that cracked me up most watching BS Dracula 1992 was when Mina pleaded Dracula to turn her yelling "Take me away from all this death!!!" girl idk how to tell you but there were no deaths till he came over 💀

BS Mina was only paying selective attention and even more selective affection through the whole movie, let's be honest

"Hey, Dracula imprisoned your fiance and has been feeding babies to his girlfriends (did he mention those to you, by the way?) and ate a boat's worth of sailors for Reasons and then wolf-humped and undeaded your best friend and has just generally been up to some insidious shit for. A while now."

BS Mina: "What was that? I couldn't hear you over the sound of him being a <3 prince <3 who can make vampire sexytimes happen for <3 me~ <3"

As an aside, my favorite 'so mad I have to laugh' bit in it is just...how BS Dracula is clearly getting goo-goo eyed about Mina only because she looks like Dead Wife and is making assumptions that she Is Dead Wife.

No no she's the reincarnation! Honest!!

Is she? Or is it all in the face? Because I can't imagine the ye olde wife who did the dramatic heartbroken cliff-fall death over her ~lost love~ as being the same chick who immediately hit the brakes and reversed when Dracula mentioned he was an aristocrat. The same chick who was willing to cozy up to him despite the whole 'being engaged to the guy who you left behind to be a boytoy bloodslave back at the castle' and 'being besties with your latest assault victim' things.

Like.

Buddy.

Are you sure this is your girl? Because she and loyalty are very clearly NOT on speaking terms. I think you just landed an opportunist who gave only a fractional shit about her supposed loved ones compared to your title and your immortal blood magic goodie bag offering. The whole movie is a bad joke, but the idea that Francis' Dracula got sidetracked out of his scheming because he fell for a lookalike's relationship con job is a little funny to me