#there are some things that no one teaches you love. that god IN HIS AWFUL WISDOM JUST PROGRAMS IN
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#my art#one piece#one piece fanart#black leg sanji#sanji#op sanji#sanji op#sanji one piece#hozier inspired because why is To Someone From A Warm Climate such a sanji song???????#there are some things that no one teaches you love that god in his awful wisdom just programmes in....#the feel of coldness only water brings........#im in shambles
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me when to someone from a warm climate (uiscefhuaraithe)
#ITS SO INTIMATE#ITS SO DISGUSTINGLY PERSONAL#I FEEL LIKE IM INTRUDING IN ON SOMETHING#god. you’d press your body to the concrete when you were small#THE RAINS OF WINTER SEEMED TO NEVER LEAVE THE WALL#he said in an interview he wrote this for his partner at the time and he would send them snippets through voice messages and stuff#and like. oh. wow#FUCKKKKK#there are some things that no one teaches you love. that god IN HIS AWFUL WISDOM JUST PROGRAMS IN#not ok#to someone from a warm climate#bea talks hozier#hozier
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Some fluffy head canons I have about the Baldurs Babes
mainly at camp :)
Gale stops tav to lace their boots, sarcastically tutting as he does it.
Karlach holds her hands round someones bowl and cups to warm them if they cool down too much. (Mama K microwave™)
Jaheira and Halsin share nightcaps and chat about the tadpole team. Mainly laughing at their comparative lack of experience - always ends on a 'they're good eggs tho' vibe.
Astarion and Shadowheart rate people's hair to eachother as an injoke, tav hears them mumbling numbers behind them whenever they speak to someone.
Lae'zel asks Gale to explain and pronounce things when no one is around because the 'annoying wizard' won't make fun, he's too eager to teach.
Jaheira has the best bedtime stories but they get Karlach hyped up and she asks a lot of questions till Astarion begs her to be quiet. Wyll takes mental notes for his own storytelling.
Karlach will force a game of 'I Spy' any time there is silence on the road.
Wyll is very good at little random gifts, he just remembers anything someone mentions to him. He's also low-key emotional if you return that kindness, 'you remembered?! 😭'
Halsin stops, kneels and whispers as he points and shows tav interesting plants or animals he spots when walking. 'look there's the mother and her babies' type shit. (He is camp dad(dy) ok)
Wyll teaches Lae'zel fencing. She's too keen though and tries to pin him down. She is not as graceful... But she has fun... chk!
Gale keeps a tiny portrait of Tara on him, you can't tell me modern au Gale's phone wouldn't be full of cat pics.
Astarion watches over the camp at night, he acts like he 'might as well/ I'm the only one lurking in the dark around HERE darlings' but sometimes he secretly gets a little teary looking at his first real friends all together.
Shadowheart writes moody poetry. She would tell Gale but she doesn't care for his taste... Or his possible critiques. If he ever did find her journal though he would be VERY enthused.
Astarion and tav will play with people's wardrobes when looting. Tav loves a funny hat and Astarion will do impressions of who he thinks would wear such god's awful attire.
Gale and Wyll play chess together after dinner some nights. They both say progressively cheesy lines when they take pieces, which is its own game itself at this point.
Halsin would quietly sing or hum to owlbear baby and scratch at night. Little lullabies and he'd probably tuck them in too. OR he'd be big daddy bear and snuggle up, especially when owlbear is scared and misses his mum.
The gang have played 'never have I ever' ONE time and ONE time only. It was a messy night.
... Jaheira was 100% last man standing.
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#astarion#gale dekarios#astarion ancunin#gale of waterdeep#bg3 companions#karlach#shadowheart#wyll#wyll ravengard#jaheira#halsin#lae'zel#karlach cliffgate#bg3 headcanons#baldurs gate 3#baldurs gate headcanon#tav#bg3 tav#fluff#bg3 fluff#baldurs gate 3 fluff
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*short fic alert* (fic under page break)
Hear me out. Is this….John Price?!
The 141 get home late from a mission, Johnny and Gaz go straight to the showers and Simon slinks off to wherever it is he winds down after a tough few days.
You have been sat on the proverbial bench for the past few weeks with a bullet wound to the shoulder. While rendered useless to the team, you decide to take up a new hobby. So far, the boys have been lab rats for the taste tests of whatever concoction you pull from the oven.
The burnt cookies (that you’d forgotten to put eggs in) that Kyle had whined about almost breaking his perfect teeth. Johnny managed to gobble them up and didn’t seem to understand what the problem was, leading Simon to joke that the man had no taste buds.
Or the time you accidentally used Salt instead of Sugar in the Victoria Sponge cake. Kyle subtlety threw his slice in the bin while you weren’t looking making sounds as if he had enjoyed in. Johnny ate it, making it look so delicious that you were getting confident that your baking skills were finally improving. Simon took a slice back to his room and in the privacy of his own bed, took a bite, and immediately spat it down the toilet. “Christ Almighty, that fuckin’ twat really doesn’t have taste buds” he cursed.
You perfect your skills over the next couple of weeks, with Johnny and Kyle remaining endlessly supportive of your new venture. But the entire time, John avoids your baking attempts.
“Need to watch my weight, love”
“Wish I could have a bite, but I’m on a diet, sweetheart”
“Can’t afford to pile on the pounds at my age, Dove”
They are John’s favourite excuses. You won’t admit it, but it makes you sad. You want to make all of your boys happy. Also, he isn’t even that old for gods sake.
Simon knows that the Captain is avoiding your god awful attempts. But even Simon notices that your skills are slowly improving. He keeps sneaking cupcakes and cookies into his room and this past week, especially, they’d been… alright. Well - apart from the horrifically deformed attempt of decorating a cake like Yoda. It looked like a slimy goblin with wonky eyes - but it tasted ok.
So picture this, they get home from a three day long mission. You’d missed your boys. You’d left your most recent cake on the kitchen counter before going to bed. You climb out from your bed when you hear their tired footsteps heading down the hall.
You poke your head out of the door. Johnny and Kyle come over and give you a soft hug. “Christ, you boys stink” you say. “Fuck off” Kyle laughs, before stripping himself of his shirt “gonna hop straight in the shower anyway. See you in the mornin’, yeah?” he asks. I nod and watch as he leaves towards his room.
Johnny stands, watching Kyle retreat. “I smell even worse than him, hen” he says, trying to shove your head into his armpit. You fight him off and shoo him down the hall.
Simon walks past and gives a small nod, “you might want to go and see Price. He made a beeline for the kitchen” he grumbles, continuing on his way casually.
That comment puts you on edge. Is John hurt? Is he looking for you? You quickly slide on your fluffy slippers and shuffle down to the kitchen as quickly as you can.
The scene that greets you is the last thing you expect to see. The Captain, in a wide stance, leaning one hand on the counter, devouring your Cake (the best one you’d baked so far!!!) with just a single fork. He’d polished off at least half of it, showing no signs of slowing down.
You can’t help but giggle at the scene. “Is it good…?”
“Fuckin’ hell, Love. It’s delicious”
The blush that erupts over your cheeks is immense.
“That was supposed to be shared..” you mumble.
“Not in a sharing mood” he says through a mouthful of cake.
“It’s rude to chew with your mouth open, Captain” you joke.
“Teach me some manners then, sweetheart” he teases, stabbing the fork into the top of the remaining quarter of cake before crowding into your personal space.
“Cakes almost as sweet as you” he whispers into your left ear before leaving the kitchen with a smug smile as you stand frozen in place.
“Oh, I’ve forgotten something!” He mentions from down the hall before turning back and snatching the cake box from the counter. He pauses on his way out, pecking you on the cheek and heading to his office as if that was totally normal behaviour.
You’d be lying if you said you didn’t stand touching the spot that he’d kissed for half an hour after he’d left.
Your phone interrupts your frozen state. It’s a text from the group chat.
………..
Johnny: “Kyle, d’ya think Cap told her how he feels yet?”
………
Johnny: “c’mon ya cunt, don’t ignore my message. I know your out the shower I can hear you laughin through the wall”
………
Simon’s voice bellows throughout the hallway “wrong fuckin’ chat, you moron” followed by Kyle cackling and Johnny swearing loudly.
You’re still standing in the doorway of the kitchen, in shock, when the door to John’s office opens.
“Guess you saw that, eh?” he asks, sheepishly.
You nod your head, zoning in on a piece of icing on the corner of his mouth. As if on instinct, you reach up and wipe it with your finger, sticking it into your mouth, before freezing again, realising what you’d just done.
Johns eyes follow your finger, hungrily.
“If you wanted to taste it, you could’ve just asked, love”
#john price x reader#task force x reader#captain john price#price x reader#john price#task force 141#cod x reader
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uhhh thinkin about how mizu and taigen's relationship was described as "this meeting of the minds, this meeting of the swords, that they could not share with anybody else" in one of the netflix articles about the show
and i'm going crazy because YEAH they're both equally invested about swords and fighting in a way that nobody else in their lives are. and that's just. so important considering we're talking about mizu, who sees her sword as her own soul.
and it's not JUST mizu who's obsessed with fighting. taigen is too. cuz like after their duel at the shindo dojo, as taigen is examining his bald spot in the mirror where mizu cut off his hair, he literally interrupts his own turmoil over losing his honour, just to express his awe, openly admiring mizu's skill DESPITE the fact that mizu just beat his ass and stripped his honour and status from him
then in the next episode, mizu says a very similar line when she examines the cut flower that fowler had pinned to heiji shindo's robe.
this was also such a sudden thing to notice in the middle of their conversation (my interpretation of this is that it hints to fowler's own skills with a blade, and gives mizu information about her enemy being a formidable opponent), but the fact that mizu had such a keen eye and managed to hone in on such a tiny detail from like a foot or two away is interesting because it shows us just how attentive mizu is, especially when it comes to blades and anything to do with them
to mizu (when she's not spiralling and agonising over her own self-hatred and the way the world treats her), swords are not a mere tool for revenge, but an art form which she is fascinated by and loves and admires. we see this from time to time, during rare moments of respite, like when she admires the duel in the beginning of ep4
mizu also takes to heart all the teachings from her years training, while taigen is interestingly less strict about them, basically disregarding some of those teachings as mere pedantry, or even if he doesn't actually really think so, he at least tells mizu as much in his attempt to comfort her after her sword breaks
but that doesn't mean he doesn't care for the more formal aspects of his training at all. because in ep3 when he says this
this line about mount sumeru is not talking about the literal mountain in front of them, but is a recitation of a line from the lotus sutra, which is among the mahayana sutras that they learned as part of their spiritual training, as zen buddhism forms a lot of the basis for samurai doctrines and philosophy. the sutra given more emphasis in the show is the heart sutra that mizu writes on her body in ep7 during her rite of rebirth
so taigen saying this line, as i see it, is a way to bond with mizu, or at least make conversation over their shared knowledge, as we see him await a reaction as soon as he says this. but mizu gives him none, and he looks disappointed/annoyed/frustrated or what have you as he watches her walk off without a word
also we see a little more of their shared knowledge of swordsmanship in the last episode when it's clear that mizu has been training ringo in sword fighting techniques
and later taigen recognises it instantly
they're both nerds about swords and fighting!!! they both respect each other's skills!!!
GOD i really hope in future episodes they get to bond some more over their shared passion and common training and just samurai camaraderie in general!!! mizu clearly loves the artistry of sword fighting so much, she deserves to have a confidant who shares that with her, someone she can talk openly about these things to!!!
because like remember when mikio was telling her about the naginata, she looked soooo uwu in love!!! admiring her husband as he showed off the weapon and told her the benefits of using it!!! believing at the time that she'd found a match who she could openly share her love of martial arts with!! she was having so much fun sparring him too. everyone says fighting is part of her love language and YES it IS!!!
except the difference is that mikio—due to, among other things, their large age difference and subsequent gap in life experience—believes he is mizu's teacher, rather than her equal. this is the role he's readily taken throughout their marriage, from teaching her how to throw a knife to cut down fruit (not like she needed that particular lesson), to teaching her equestrian skills.
meanwhile taigen and mizu were both kids growing up poor in the same backwater fishing village, which means that they are and always have been PEERS. and this becomes even more pronounced once taigen is stripped of his giant ego and unlearns his prejudice, allowing them both to fully respect each other and view each other as equals
which is again why it frustrates taigen when mizu admits later in this scene that she basically doesn't care about saving the shogun. like he gets mad because it upends his initial belief in their shared goals and aligned values, believing them both to be samurai of equal standing and honour.
ALSO i'd like to add, that though mizu is the better swordsman as we see her win all their brawls and matches, she doesn't surpass him by that much, and mizu knows this.
these words coming from mizu is such a huge compliment all things considered, acknowledging that he was strong enough to deserve fighting her, because shortly before this mizu was just about to say "no one has given me much of a challenge" only for taigen to enter the scene and, well, challenge her.
now combine this with her saying that chiaki's broken blade suits him well, giving to him HER sword which SHE made AND won, as a surety, promising him a duel that he "deserves". it's proof that even though she finds taigen an annoying brat and oftentimes an obstacle to her mission for revenge, she DOES respect him and does value his skills.
IN CONCLUSION nobody else is on their level, nobody else shares their love of swordsmanship and that is such an important factor to their bond and the way they relate to each other. i rest my case your honour
#mizu x taigen#taigen x mizu#taimizu#taizu#blue eye samurai#mizu blue eye samurai#taigen blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai meta#i caaaant stop thinking about THEM#like im soooo sorry im being annoying and cant shut up about these two#the brainrot is real yall. pray for me in these trying times#shut up haydar#meta dissertations.pdf#fandom.rtf
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18+ mdni. Smut and jealous reader deciding to cause a little chaos.
Popular bitchy reader grows annoyed over Eddie's attention being directed at the new girl in Hellfire.
🎀✨
You were used to Eddie's attention being only on you, the both of you driving each other crazy and continuously trading barbs and witty banter.
Robin was deadly serious when she told Steve the latest gossip about you two, that she was sure that your arguing was some weird form of foreplay. Both of you for sure got off on it.
Now though? now you were bored, upset and very pouty. The latter which Eddie secretly loved and it was all because of her, the new girl at Hellfire.
Her name was Kimberly and she was your mortal enemy, or as mortal enemy as one could get in senior year at High School.
At least for this week.
Eddie had of course noticed how pissed you were at him hanging and paying attention to someone other than you. He knew you were jealous and he was waiting for you to admit it.
Meanwhile if you heard Eddie laugh at Kimberly's joke one more time you were going to lose it.
So instead of whining and crying about Eddie being so focused on someone else you decided to distract yourself.
Distraction came in the form of Jason, much to Eddie's fury which made your flirting with Eddie's enemy all the more sweeter. Eddie's rants against the dark side escalated by the day and he takes particular care in calling out Jason, and the "balls he throws into laundry baskets being bigger than Jason's own balls"
It's thrilling watching him be so jealous, serves him right for trying to make you pissed and envious over whatshername.
Eddie finally cracks on Friday and walks over to you all dark eyes and clenched jaw, tense and seething.
"What the fuck are you doing with Carver?" He demands and you take your time answering him.
"Oh, I think it's called flirting" you reply and if it's possible his eyes narrow even more, you peer up at him and act confused.
"Why do you care so much, when you have Katie at your beck and call" the anger leaves his features and he smirks.
Shit you gave away too much. "It's Kimberly, she's new to Hellfire sweetheart. I was just showing her the ropes. Not my fault you're a jealous brat"
You glare at him, gather the things from your locker, take time to apply some lipgloss and watch Eddie grow irritated once again.
"Jason's so much nicer to me than you, I don't know why I even like you so much Edward" you reply to him and he huffs in frustration.
"Are you happy now my attention is back on you princess?, incase you haven't noticed, you're all I think about" He seethes, furious he's confessed his real feelings for you.
Elated you grab your bag and his gaze follows you as you walk out of the school and make your way towards his van, for some privacy.
"Oh I've been so awful Eddie, maybe you'll need to teach me a lesson?" you add in a pout for maximum effect and his control snaps, and he pulls you too him, kisses you until the both of you break away panting from the intensity.
"You are the only person I want. Is that what you want to hear?" Eddie demands but his gaze is a tiny bit softer. Thrilled you kiss him again and tug him inside the van.
...
You're so lost in finally being with Eddie, both of you fucking each other until you're both babbling, incoherent messes, that you don't here the knock on Eddie's window.
His van door opens, there's a shriek and you peer up, Kimberly blushes as she takes in the image of you sitting astride Eddie, tits bouncing up and down, both you and Eddie's faces full of bliss.
"Oh my god, I'm sorry, I didn't..." she trails off mortified. You roll your eyes at her babbles and squeeze around Eddie tightly, causing him to moan.
"Eddie's a little busy right now, in fact he's going to be busy with me a lot from now on, so cut the cutesy uwu girl act and back off, kay?" You add sweetly and Kimberly nods rapidly and rushes off.
Eddie is gazing at you torn between amusement and exasperation. "Princess" he chides and you shrug and begin to rock your hips in a way that makes Eddie's eyes glaze over and soft swears leave his mouth.
"Now, where were we?"
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x popular!reader#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson
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Oh no now I'm thinking about the Fourth and the Fifth again and how Jod's awful colonial space feudalism poisons everything.
You are four or five years old. Maybe you're Isaac and you never knew your dad, only that he died at enemy hands in some far flung campaign and six years later you were made to ensure an heir for the baronetcy. Or you're Jeannemary and your mother defied orders, went beyond the rim, and jumped on a grenade. If either of you have surviving parents, they're not considered sufficiently important in this great process of ensuring a suitable heir with a suitable cavalier to keep you. There is no Baron until Isaac comes of age, and the leader of a House needs to be properly trained. You are four or five years old, and you are sent away.
You're five year old Jeannemary. You're not yet sworn to your necromancer, but you've been promised to him since birth and you've been sent away from your planet and your siblings to serve him. You are your generation's Chatur and this is your purpose. And when the cavalier primary of the House you have been sent to sees a little child struggling to see over the table at a reception and props you up with a cushion, you challenge him to a duel. You don't understand why all the adults are laughing. Your honour and your necromancer are all you have left of home. Far away, at the edge of the system, Harrowhark Nonagesimus decides that puppeting her parents' corpses as her House collapses around her is a better fate than yours. At night you are tucked into bed in a room that you don't have to share with any siblings and the man who is looking after you now reads to you from a book of adventure stories and strokes your hair until you fall asleep.
You're nine year old Isaac, swearing to be one flesh, one end with your cavalier in a foreign chapel on a foreign planet. You go to school. The woman who is not quite but almost your mother is helping you to discover spirit magic far beyond the thanergy fission you would have learned at home. She is teaching you to cook and to dance. She tells you that the parts of you which back home would have been considered flaws are your greatest strengths. You have friends and playmates who will never be on the front lines, whose parents write books or engrave stele or organise the bounty of empire from ledgers and transmitter boxes. You are loved and you love, but you are beginning to understand that love comes with a cost.
You are 13 year old Jeannemary. You are back on the Fourth and after last year's bombing you are now cavalier primary. As far as you are concerned, you are grown and ready to serve god and his empire. And you have been denied twice. You don't understand why the people who love you are going to such lengths to stop you from doing what you were born to do or why they have always looked so upset when glorious news comes from home about how someone you would have grown up with, had you not been sent away, has given the ultimate service to the empire. You are cavalier primary of the Fourth House and you fear you are still being propped up on cushions.
You are Isaac Tettares and you are Baron of a planet you spent most of your childhood away from. Everyone else your age long ago shipped out with the Junior Territorials. You are the Baron of a planet but you are not in charge and you have come to understand that your father wasn't in charge either. You love the closest thing you have to parents and they love you. You miss them terribly. You resent the fact that thanks to them you will never truly lead the Fourth. There is talk of a marriage alliance when you are older. You want to be family with them. You don't entirely believe you'll live long enough to marry him when you come of age. And if you do, your half Fifth children will be another crack in what's left of the Fourth House. You miss you dad's stupid jokes and your mum's earnest discussions. You're free of their meddling. You will never be free of their meddling.
You are Jeannemary and Isaac, properly off planet and on display as scion and cavalier for the first time, offered an unimaginable chance to serve god and his empire. You crave the security of your parents. You chafe at the idea that you might be perceived as children. But for a little while you are all together again. You are planning a party. You are making friends. You will all serve the empire together. Perhaps, when you are the fingers and gestures of god, none of these differences will matter any more.
They die horribly. And later so do you. God doesn't care.
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today on “Hozier lyrics that make me feel insane,” is anyone else foaming at the mouth over:
“there are some things that no-one teaches you, love. That God in his awful wisdom first programs in.”
Or is it just me???
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mearps, "i can't believe after 3 years together this is the first time i'm ever learning this", kitchen at home
Family Recipe
Mary Earps x fem!reader
summary: have to read and find out!
“What’s cookin’ good lookin’” Mary’s booming voice startles you, making you jump and almost drop the sharp knife you’re using to slice the food. “I scared ya didn’t I?” The taller girl chuckles, placing her hands on your hips and a kiss on your cheek.
“Yes, yes you did.” You huff in fake annoyance while playfully giving her a scolding look.
“Awe you’re so adorable all pouty.” Mary moves in a baby voice as one of her big hands reaches up and squeezes your cheeks. You quickly smack her hand away and mumble something under your breath as you turn your body back to the food.
“How was training?” The goalkeeper sighs, leaning against the counter while watching you do your thing.
“Exhausting, annoying, smelly, and any other adjectives I have missed. Besides that what are you stirring up over there, love?” Your girlfriend quirks an eyebrow and attempts to look over your shoulder only for her sight to still be blocked.
“I am starting to make my uncle’s signature pasta sauce so we can have some tonight.” You say, smiling at her giddy state when she starts clapping her hands in excitement.
At every family function your uncle brings his homemade pasta along with his sauce. Mary is always the first to get a plate and the first to get seconds. Nobody in the family knows the recipe besides your uncle, you, and your mom which makes Mary very jealous when you won’t share it with her.
The taller girl reappears behind you, wrapping her arms around your waist and hugging you along with placing random kisses either on your shoulders, head, or cheek. You smile at her clingy behavior, enjoying being close to her after not seeing each other for most of the week.
“Y’know what?” You ask, turning around to face her.
“What?”
“Do you want to help me cook?” Mary looks even more confused considering she doesn’t know anything about how the dish is made.
“I can’t help because I don’t know how.” Your girlfriend huffs while crossing her arms, annoyed that you’re basically rubbing it in her face.
“I think it’s time I can teach you.” You let out a big squeal when the goalkeeper’s arms lift you up into the air and spin you around in glee. “Okay okay, calm down there, cowboy. I gotta be conscious to do so.” You tease which the other girl doesn’t notice from being too caught up putting on an apron she jokingly got for you one day.
“Chef Mary reporting for duty.” She stands tall while fake saluting, making you giggle at her determination and silly nature.
“Alright you goof, you can start by cutting those tomatoes over there.” You point over to the free area with the knife.
“I can’t believe after 3 years together, this is the first time I’m ever learning this.” The taller girl speaks with a certain eagerness and reaches for the veggie and fruit bowl.
“Mary, those are apples.”
A little while later all the ingredients are already in the pot and formed into the signature sauce. You scoop up a little with the wooden spoon and hold her hand under it in case anything spills while blowing to cool it off.
“Time for the final test. Try and see if it’s good.” You hold up the spoon, gesturing for her to open her mouth. Once she does, you angle it up into her mouth in an attempt to make it all in but some drips down the corner of your lips.
“God, that’s so delicious I’ll never get over it.” She groans at the taste immediately wanting more.
“You got a little something right there.” You smile while wiping the remains of the dressing off her chin. While trying to gather it off her face, you don’t notice the loving expression she has while staring down at you. “There you go, my love.” You say, sucking it off your thumb before you swiftly get pulled in for a time-stopping kiss.
The kiss is so unbelievably tender and sweet that you almost faint. You can tell how much love is being poured into it just by the feeling of her lips and her hand cradling your face. Once air becomes a problem, you pull away reluctantly while staring at each other in awe.
“Wow.” You whisper, placing your hands over hers that still rest on your face.
“I love ya. I love ya so so so much.” She finalizes her statement with another big kiss on your lips. In your head, you know that this is forever. No one besides family can know the secret recipes and now she’s your family.
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Hello! I'd love to request Charlie Swan with a teacher girlfriend. Perhaps he comes to visit on his lunch or something and sees how attached the kids are to her and it makes him happy to see how caring she is. Please and thank you!(I work with pre k but my former class was todds and they are still clingy 💖💖)
Lunch Break (Charlie Swan X Teacher!Reader)
Masterlist
Request Something!
Summary: Chief Swan visits his girlfriend on his lunch break, and can’t help but adore the way she is with her students.
A/N: i know nothing about taking care of or teaching little kids lol
***
Charlie wasn’t used to being around a toddler, let alone twenty of them. Even when his daughter Bella was at that age, he didn’t see her much.
Yet here he was, sitting in his girlfriend’s classroom, having lunch with her while a group of toddlers napped on the floor.
“So, how’s your day been?” You asked in a whisper, picking at the burger and fries that Charlie had brought you from the Carver Cafe.
“Oh, not much.” He responded in an equally low voice, but more gruff. His fingers smoothed over his mustache before speaking again. “Still looking into those missing persons cases, but we’ve been coming up with nothing.”
“You’ll find something, bear.” You squeezed his shoulder, and he leaned into your touch. “You always do.”
“Yeah, maybe… But enough about me, how’s your day?”
You let out a tiny laugh, not surprised that Charlie would bounce the attention onto you as soon as he could.
“Well, today we had an art day.” You gestured to one of your tables on the opposite side of the room, covered in different drying papers. “Watercolor, crayon, markers, that kind of thing. That was really fun. I know I shouldn’t play favorites, but I really like Delilah’s. You know her mom, right? Samantha?” Charlie nodded after a quick moment of thought, and so you continued. “Well, she wanted to make a meadow, so she covered her paper in green, and then she stamped little fingerprints all over as flowers. I mean, you kinda have to ask her what it is to figure out what it is, but I don’t know, it was really cute and- oh my god, I’m rambling, huh?” You covered your mouth to stop more word vomit from spilling, a little giggle slipping past your fingers.
Charlie pulled your hand away, laying a kiss on your knuckles. He nudged your knee with his own, a coy smile on his lips.
“No, I like hearing you talk.” Your cheeks reddened, and you scrunched your nose at him. He squeezed your hand. “Come on, keep going. What happened after painting?”
“Read the kids a story.” You answered, trying to remember the title. “They really like that Llama Llama book. But some of the kids really wanted ‘Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus!’ so I told them I’d read that after nap time. Then they all had food, fell asleep, and then you came with lunch.” You ate a fry before stealing a sip of Charlie’s coffee. You liked how he didn’t mind, instead watching you with a fond expression. “Which is delicious, by the way, thank you.”
“No problem, sweetheart.”
“Ms. Y/n?” A tiny voice sounded from one of the sleeping mats. You gave Charlie’s hand a quick squeeze before letting go and standing up from your chair.
“Jayden?” You asked quietly, even though you knew it was him from his voice. “Are you okay?”
“Bad dream.” The little boy answered, rolling off his cot and looking at you with bleary eyes and a frown.
“Aw, I’m sorry, honey.” You said softly, crouching down close to him. “Do you want a hug?”
He nodded a few times, carefully walking through his sleeping classmates to reach you. He latched his arms around your neck, and you patted his back, waiting until he felt better.
Charlie saw the interaction from the corner of his eye, not wanting little Jayden to feel watched. He couldn’t help but smile at how quickly you were able to comfort him. It was clear that you were made for this kind of work, being so caring and nurturing without even thinking about it.
“Feeling better?” You asked Jayden as he let go of you, and he nodded. You smiled at him. “I’m glad. Now, you have a couple more minutes before we gotta start waking up. Do you wanna lay back down?” Jayden nodded again, and with a little wave of his hand, he tiptoed back over to his mat.
When he was settled, you stood up from your crouched position and went back to Charlie, who was looking at you with a twinkle in his eye.
“What?” You asked, finishing off the rest of your food.
“Nothing.” He said, shaking his head a bit. Charlie looked at his watch and sighed, realizing his break was almost over. “I should probably leave. The boys’ll need me back at the station soon.”
“Okay.” You said with a slight pout, wishing you had more time with him. The two of you cleaned up, Charlie insisting that he could throw the trash away on his way out. “I’ll see you later, bear.”
“See you soon, sweetheart.” Charlie kissed your cheek and went to the door, giving you a wave before exiting the room.
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Could I get Alastor x Reader where he teaches her to swing dance in their room after they both talk about what was popular when they died as she comes from the current earth era so either 2010s or 2020s up to you!
Thank you so much if you write this and if you do not wish too that is totally okay! Have a wonderful day!
Aaaaaah, such a cute prompt! Of course I tried my hands on that, dear! I hope you'll like it!
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Going with the times
You flipped the page in the heavy photo album, laughing. „Oh look, that's from my first party as a university student!“ Alastor scrunched his nose. „These shoes are quite... scandalous, dear.“ „Hey, I was in my early twenties, everyone wore overknee boots.“ „That doesn't make them decent.“
You elbowed him, with playful annoyance. „Watch it, I don't make fun of your style choices!“ Alastor cocked a brow at you, grinning proudly. „That's because I always dressed with timless class and style, sweetheart.“ His gaze returned to the picture – You, arm in arm with your group of friends, in the midst of a club in the city you went to study for a degree you never used, since you died too young.
„What kind of establishment were you at, anyway? It looks awfully... modern.“
You rolled your eyes. You knew Alastor enough to know that when said 'modern', he really meant 'awful'. The only 'modern' thing Alastor didn't hate, was you.
„It's a dance club. Me and my girlfriends used to go almost every weekend, just dancing, having a good time and a few drinks.“
Alastor looked intrigued. „Oh? What style did you dance to? I always loved swing and jazz, but I do enjoy a good quick-Step too.“
You couldn't help but snicker – he truly didn't keep up with the times, that one.
„No, Al, no... that kind became very... formal. We just danced, you know? To hip hop, or electronica and clubhouse, like this!“
You hopped up from your bed, swaying your hips, lifting up your arms and bouncing to a beat only your could hear. He watched you, half amused and half horrified. He laughed and shook his head at your movements, so you stopped, hands flew on your hips and you rose your chin. „Okay old man, why don't you show me how you danced when you were young and wild?“
He was so quick, you didn't even see him moving when you already felt one arm around your waist, the other lifting your hand.
„Oh my dear, it's my pleasure to demonstrate what real dancing is all about!“
As only Alastor could do, an upbeat, jazzy song began to play from god knows where, and he began stepping sideways and forwards with you clumsily following him. With each stumble, he caught you with his reassuring, beaming smile, his patient guidance encouraging you to press on.
He truly had some energy to his step, spinning you every which way and having you laugh out loudly. After your first awkward steps, you found some kind of pattern to stick to, and your feet slowly but surely fell into his set rhythm without crushing his toes. He noticed that as well and chuckled, increasing the tempo and spinning you gleefully. „Bravo, darling, bravo! Now come, don't lose your flow, eyes on me! Excellent. A twist! Ha-ha-ha, marvelous, and again!“
You found yourself lost in the music and enjoying this way of dancing thoroughly, your heart beating as quick as your dancemoves. You felt warm and lightheaded in his arms as he moved with you, until the music ceased way too soon, and you two stood in the middle of your room, a bit out of breath and panting softly.
Alastor pushed a stray strand of hair from your face back behind your ears, grinning smugly.
"How about it, darling? You want to try that in your silly overknee boots?"
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Ω PJO DEMIGOD HEADCANONS:
💀 HADES: God of the Dead and Riches 💎
author's note: I had a sudden idea about writing some headcanons Camp Halfblood demigods being claimed and what it's like for each respective god and cabin, followed by a small blurb afterwards. Thank you for reading and please like and reblog! The order is not in order of the cabin numbers. [PJO DEMIGOD HEADCANONS MASTERLIST]
You’re not claimed in a way like the others. Instead you come across a pale faced boy with black hair, dark bags under his eyes, and a leather jacket. The ensemble he wore screamed something to you and he introduced himself to you as Nico, child of Hades. And you’re one of his half-siblings.
Whether you’re like him, a child of Hades displaced out of time before the Oath was made after WW2, or a child born after the oath was rescinded, Nico has been finding any Hades’ demigods he could find. If you didn’t know better, you would think it was his life mission.
When you arrive at Camp, whether Camp Half Blood or Camp Jupiter, people already know who your godly parent or blood is when Nico is with you, but the claim over your head is just icing on the cake. It is the sign of the cusp of fall and winter together, the silence that presides over it.
People give you a wide berth of respect, awe and fear. Not surprising given how powerful Hades is.
Regardless, Nico sticks by your side and helps guide you. He teaches you how to handle the dead and the more peskier ghosts, but ultimately, he doesn’t let you feel alone. You tell your story to him and he tells his.
You’re also introduced to Hazel who seems the complete opposite of Nico but you realise that while children of Hades both stick together but are very independent. Solitary but not isolated.
While it may be bothersome and sometimes unsettling seeing ghosts and spirits, there are perks; you can reanimate and see dead and loved animals. You always tell the doggos they are good boys. That or the hellhounds.
“Hello Darkness, my old friend”- ‘The Sound of Silence’ by Simon and Gafunkel.
Regardless if you’re Greek or Roman, when people diss and don’t believe that the planetary Pluto is not a planet, you will get bad and they will know to never diss Pluto.
Dried flowers, fungi, antiques, faded memories, abandoned buildings. Once filled with life and encompassed with what could be death. Many do not appreciate them but they open themselves to you, and you and your siblings remember them. You carry old, past clothes on your backs, you gently touch the dried petals of flowers with their faint smell still cling to you. You see the hands that touched the antiques, touches of human life. You see the abandoned buildings and know that they were built and housed life in them with their shelter.
While you may be part of Death’s domain, you greatly cherish life; the people in your life and that help shape you. When you love someone, you love them to a beyond that transcends death.
You know about shadow traveling as Nico helped you go through it. At the minimum, you can fold yourself into the shadows and be unseen like Hades, but at the most, you can travel to any place where shadows preside over. You find its easier to travel to places wherever Hades’ domain presides over; you can travel more easily to places of death (i.e. cemetery, battlezones, altars) and riches (i.e. mines, the world trade centre, places of great bounty, banks). A rare power of a child of Hades may call things forth from the shadows, whether its things you place into the shadows or using the shadows to your will. You can grab an objects’ shadow to your advantage or use your hands to create shadow shapes to ‘life’. It is rumoured that once, a child of Hades that possessed that skill was able to freeze a person with their shadow pinned by them, and was able to kill them by simply cutting off a person’s shadow.
Like Hades, you may seem aloof and stern in matters, but on the other hand, this can be seen as fair and honourable.
When the children of Hades gather in one place, you all give off an Addams' family vibe. The aesthetics, the attitude toward things. Hades is Gomez and Persephone is Morticia, you can guess where it goes from there.
You looked at Nico, who introduced himself as your half-brother. You tried to find the similarities you two shared and while it isn’t entirely physical, there is an air around him that draws you in. A solace if you will. It’s been more than 70 years since your original time and now here you are, in the 21st century. You thought you had died and now you were here, breathing. You could feel the anticipation turning into dread when you would eventually realize the math of your birth era and now.
It was a stark change from your time, yet in some sort of attempt to grasp your sanity, you started to find similarities, things that seemed to be the same from your time and this time. It calmed you down but also at the same time, you were a bit overwhelmed where your half brother had taken you.
McDonalds, he said. You looked at the meal he had bought and inspected it. It was different yet strangely good? The soda-pop however, was entirely bizarre but still delicious (sickeningly sweet you thought).
You both ate your meal as Nico gave you a rundown of the situation. The existential weight of being children of Hades and Pluto was, especially after the creation of the Big Three Oath after the world war, and how it was absolved not too long ago in this time by a son of Poseidon. Then came the eventual appearances of deceased children of Hades and Pluto, which you found out were either killed in the wars, or were deliberately hunted down by Zeus and Poseidon; much like Nico and his sister Bianca.
Nico tried to give you a rundown of what times are like now and their delicate situation, but even then, Nico wasn’t too knowledgeable given everything.
Silence fell between the two of you, as you tried to process literally everything. You tried to speak but the knot in your stomach and the weight in your throat was getting heavier. It was becoming awkward and you looked at Nico, realising he too was out of his depth. You found some amusement that he really must be your brother if the two of you were both socially inept.
You saw Nico open the two red box with the golden arches, before he took out the two toys. You looked at them, wondering really how the meals costed. Toys weren’t very cheap back in the day, and while you had a feeling manufacturing must’ve improved, to have a toy come with a meal must be costly…but you were sure of how much Nico paid as you watched him to get a handle on today’s currency.
“So uh….which of the kids meals toys do you want?” he stammered.
You stared at him with wider eyes as you saw him slowly shift in his seat in awkwardness. Everything came to a head as the hilarity of the situation dawned upon you. You started laughing as Nico looked at you like you had grown a second head.
“I’ll take this one” you chuckled, taking the toy before wiping away the tears, “Thank you Nico.”
“I mean…I eat here pretty frequently-”
“I mean finding us” you said, as Nico blinked at you owlishly. You placed a hand on top of his in a reassuring gesture. “You went through a lot and you’re just as young as us, yet here you are, finding the rest of us who may be wandering limbo and offering us toys.”
“Well…it’s not fair” he tried to play off.
“None of it is fair,” you noted, “But this is.”
Nico stared at you before nodding. “We have to go to Camp to get you settled in,” he started.
You hummed as you helped clean up, “Perhaps yeah…then where next?”
“What?”
You smirked at Nico, “If you want to go alone, you can but if you’re going to find the rest of us, count me in.”
“Are you sure? There’s a lot to digest.”
“Probably, but we’re demigods, I doubt things are going to be normal for a long time.”
#pjo fanfic#pjo imagine#percy jackson and the olympians imagines#pjo#pjo imagines#pjo x reader#Hades#child of hades#nico di angelo#children of hades#demigod h/cs#demigod reader#demigod headcanons#demigod imagines#pjo reader insert#nico di angelo imagine#percy jackson and the olympians imagine#riordanverse#cabin 13#hades cabin#percy jackon and the olympians
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Hi! Fellow desi here...
So Navratri is coming soon and I am really excited already!! Can you please write something about spending Navratri with Lando. It would be like teaching him the garba steps and the reader being obsessed with garba and Lando just being in awe.
I love your writing sooo much <3
Desi Girl ༉‧₊˚.
彡 ln x desi!reader 🪷
彡 fluff + smau 🪷
masterlist ☾☼
being an indian meant that there was some festival or the other every few months. that meant new clothes, new jewellery, and the same old feeling of being blessed by the gods and goddesses. for most indians, the blessings of the almighty was all they sought throughout the year.
navratri was one of y/n's favourite festivals. nine days of music, dance, and worshipping different goddessess. every year, y/n bought nine new chaniya cholis for the festival, and every year she danced all night till her feet had blisters. it was the happiest she ever felt.
this year was different though, because she had a boyfriend. a boyfriend who was hot and rich and very much british. since the festival and the autumn break coincided, lando had decided to spend the break with his girlfriend in india. y/n had taken him shopping to all kinds street markets, where all he really did was hold her bags, give his opinion when asked, and made sure that she was hydrated. he had watched as she bargained, and tried on jhumkas, and smiled and laughed even though the sun was scorching hot.
the first two days of navratri had been y/n doing garba with her family and friends, and lando watching from afar, afraid to step into the fast moving circles of humans who were dancing in perfect sync. everyone was sweaty, especially his girlfriend, but she seemed to shine in the sweat. that just made lando fall in love even more.
on the third day, y/n had decided that she would teach lando the basic steps of garba. she took him in a little corner, not too secluded, but there was enough space for him to practice. she taught him the footwork of the dance, but even after multiple tries, lando tripped way more than he ever thought was imaginable. his girlfriend laughed though, so he hadn't completely failed at dancing.
he had tried participating with her friends, where they were all doing the same basic steps that y/n had been teaching him. after a few minutes of stepping on people's toes, and people stepping on his toes, lando had given up, sweating, shining, smiling.
y/n had grabbed his hand and pulled him to the food stalls. lando had never eaten anything like it before, but y/n was excited, and she was happy, and lando eating whatever she wanted him to would make her happier, so who was he to question it?
their first stop had been the pani puri stall. it was certainly an experience to try and fit the entire puri in his mouth without staining his clothes. when he had complained to y/n that there was no way he could fit the whole thing in his mouth, she had smirked at him and said, "remember when i said that to you? that it wasn't going to fit in my mouth?"
lando was blushing, knowing exactly what she was talking about, "y/n,"
"what did you say to me then? ah, yeah, practice makes perfect," y/n had been smiling wide as she teased him. lando had choked on the pani puri, and y/n had laughed, patting his back.
they went through all the stalls, where y/n proceeded to stuff him full of food. it was all extremely spicy for him, and despite y/n laughing at how red he had gotten, lando was determined to not ruin the fun. eventually, she had fed him gulab jamuns, kheer, and so many other sweets, he had lost track.
after eating, lando and y/n walked around the area, talking and laughing, and he had never felt so in love. he repeatedly told her how beautiful she looked, and even at the tenth and hundredth time, y/n blushed just the same. god, she really was breathtaking.
"so, what's the next festival?" lando asked.
"well, navratri ends on saturday, and then we have dusshera on sunday, and then, about two weeks later, diwali! oh, are you going to stay? i mean, i know you have your training and you have to be at the mtc for work or whatever, but dusshera is really fun, cause my nana sits all of us kids down and tells us the whole story of lord ram and how he defeated ravan!" she was rambling, they both knew, but lando loved it.
"i'm going to make sure i'm here on sunday," lando said softly.
"yeah?" her small hands were squeezing his big ones in hope.
lando leaned in, kissing her softly, before he pulled back, "yeah,"
lando.jpg
♫ Desi Girl (From "Dostana")
liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 801,572 others
lando.jpg who's the hottest girl in the world
view all 73,496 comments
yourusername your desi girl <3
user1 is this a hard launch??? ARE WE HARD LAUNCHING RIGHT NOW???
user1 LANDO IN INDIA??? HELLO??? WHY WERE WE NOT TOLD???
user2 he better get an indian passport now
user3 jijaji pt.2???
carlossainz making the most of the break, i see
carlossainz spanish food or indian food?
lando.jpg 🤐
yourusername im watching you, norris
user2 HOLD ON DID LANDO DO GARBA?????
☪︎ ִ ࣪𖤐 𐦍 ☾𖤓
i'm not really a garba person, despite living in gujarat for quite a while, but this is specifically for my desi girls, cause we gotta feed our delusions somehow to live, right? i hope you enjoy it! i've also got a link for my taglist and requests that you can find here!
#f1#formula 1#lando norris#ln4#formula one#lando norris imagine#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris fanfic#lando norris smau#lando x reader#lando x y/n#lando x desi!reader#ln4 x desi!reader#lando norris x desi!reader#desi f1blr#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#☾☼#✧.*
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Xiao and his "friend"
If you see this and you think, "hey, I've seen this work before" you probably have, as I previously went by squid-God-Supreme, however, my blog got nukes, so I am re uploading almost all of my old fics. Once I'm finished uploading all the ones I intend to, I will announce that I am finished, however, after that, if you see I haven't uploaded a specific fic, you remember me writing, you can always request that I upload it.
CW : friends to lovers trope, tooth rotting fluff, Xiao being Really really awkward, gn! Reader, short fic
Being close enough to the yaksha to be considered a friend was a feat on its own
Another was getting him to fall for you
And fall he did, xiao had it bad but no one knew as he was rarely seen
You had gained the yakshas affections, the only problem was how subtle he was
Xiao has little experience with romance and while one might assume he'd be direct with such feelings, they would be wrong
Eons of pain and melania of suffering only served to teach him that gentle thing where simply no meant for him, that he would only drive them away
Too fearful of once again returning to that aching loneliness, he sought the help of zhongli
Much of xiao's romantic subtleties stem from the former god, his years of knowledge on seemingly anything has taught him various traditions and intracys of love and commerce alike.
The glances he steals when you sleep, the longing gaze that fills his amber eyes- and the gentle hand that wishes for nothing more than to touch your cheek, all too quick to retreat when you stir in your slumber, not knowing that you would have grasped his hand in yours.
You were a sweet dream, a love he longed for yet one he said he could not obtain.
But unbeknownst to the adepti you felt the same
You loved xiao, more than he would ever know
You didn't think yourself good enough of his affections, solemnly convincing yourself that he couldn't harbor affection for you
You called yourself a fool for believing that there was even a chance that he would return your feelings
And while you knew you had no right to be jealous of the traveler it didn't stop the ache you felt
He looked so at peace with them, and you wondered if you had ever seen the same when you were with him
Xiao was tired, he was growing impatient with this pining, and the distance that you seemed to create made his hands twitch anxiously
Had he made a mistake? Had he reached to close and caused you to fly away?
You no longer stood as close to him, your hands did not brush against his gloved ones and your visits to the inn began to lessen
He felt it again, the gnawing at his mind as it screamed that he had hurt you in some way and the painful beats of his heart as they rang in his ears
It felt awful to stand so far away from him, inches feeling like miles as you hoped he didn't notice the sadness in your eyes
But it was for the better you told yourself
You took a deep breath as you walked up the stairs of the inn, a silent prayer that the yaksha was not there tonight. “Is xiao here?” you asked, feigning hopefulness as you looked at verr. “Ah no, im sorry dear, he went with the traveler to help with a commission” that hurt, despite the hope that he wouldn't be there it didn't stop the pang of jealousy. You shoot these thoughts quickly reminding yourself that this is what you wanted. “But why don't you leave him some almond tofu, i'm sure he'd appreciate it” you nodded and smiled, it would be suspicious if you declined, so of course you picked up the plate and made your way to the top floor of the inn. What verr had told you was no lie, xiao had gone with the traveler to complete a commission, however he had returned a while ago, neglecting to inform verr of his return, knowing that if you heard he was here you wouldn't come. So he waited with narrowed eyes for your figure to come up. He was done with this, he would figure out exactly why you had created this distance. He was thankful that the inn was slow tonight, no one was on the top floor, it was the perfect opportunity to confront you.
Your lips were tugged down in a frown, the glossy look in your eyes made something in xiao break, once the plate of almond tofu was set on the floor and you had turned back to quickly retreat from the inn he appeared. Strong arms caged you against the railing as a piercing amber gaze lingered on yours. His hand held one of your wrists so you couldn't run away, but his grip was feather light, gentle and not bruising. “Why?” his voice was loud enough for only you to hear, but it held no aggression or malice. You could only stare back confused, why what? You didn't understand. “I have told you before, the bond between us is too strong to sever now. So why? What has made you want to sever it?” he was too close, your eyes couldn't dart anywhere but his burning gaze. “I don't know what you-” he pressed closer to you, “you do.” he stated as if it was a fact set in stone. “You just seem happy with them, I don't want to ruin that with my feelings” it was his turn for confusion to take hold. “The traveler” you clarified.
It all seemed to click in his head and he sighed, resting his head against yours. His eyes were still wide open, gold irises swimming with relife. “Are you really such a dense mortal? Have you truly not noticed my affections? or my courtship?” Xiao asked, his hand leaving your wrist to cup your cheek. You stared in shock, you wanted to pinch yourself to know you weren’t dreaming. “Mortal memories are inadequate, perhaps you need a reminder that the bond between us is too strong to be severed, especially now.”
It really was like a sweet dream, the feeling of his lips pressed gently to yours, any worry harbored washing away as you wondered if he was really there. But he was, and he had no intention of leaving, of course it wasn't as if you'd let him, your hands finding purchase on his arms as such a light kiss left your breathless.
#xiao x reader#xiao x you#genshin xiao#xiao genshin impact#xiao genshin x reader#genshin impact#genshin x reader#genshin imagines#xiao headcanons#squiddy<3 old fics
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been rereading svsss soooo combining my current hyperfixations here
everytime there's a reader isekai au it's always them loving the universe they've transmigrated into but what about a reader who's a borderline HATER (me) of black myth wukong or lego monkie kid
(tdlr: this does not represent how i feel about either video game and show, because i like them both, the fandoms are just...eh...but i do think it'll be funny lmfao)
i'm talking a full time hater. they've read jttw and fssy and of COURSE they love those books, they're a huge myth nerd.
then they take one fucking look at the adaptions inspired by them and immediately go "oh fuck no"
a reader who DESPISES lmk's portrayal of sun wukong because what the fuck do you mean he's not a buddhist after his journey? what do you mean he didn't kick the jade emperor's ass and fucking isn't badass and cool? what the fuck do you mean the six eared macaque is his 'best friend' and people SHIP them?? what do you mean no one likes tripitaka and apparently the three other pilgrims were reincarnated when that isn't factually correct??
a reader who positively despises the plot line in lmk because WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN NEZHA'S DEMOTED TO SOME CANON FODDER WHEN HE SHOULD BE BADASS?? or...or AZURE LION BEATING THE JADE EMPEROR?? WHO THE FUCK EVEN IS THE BROTHERHOOD EWWW!? what do you mean this dragon girl has the samadhi fire ew ew ewww what is this plot...
reader who fights with fans because of their (barf) mindset and also shut?? up?? about nezha being a 12 year old?? gross ass??
reader who watches the show religiously but only to find every flaw in it and when people argue about the show being a children's only audience they fight back with "idgaf if it's for kids they should teach it properly dumb fucking cunts gtfo my dms before i doxx you"
same thing with black myth wukong tbh. reader who hates black myth wukong because...no...no, sun wukong most certainly wouldn't do that. graphics are fine whatever but but this is?? inaccurate??
reader who's tearing into fanboys too because shut the fuck up about this character pingping bring sexy and also why the fuck does she exist?? why is red son not actually pif's son?? why is there some fucking random monkey tryna collect those whatchamacallit (relics) NO THIS IS WRONG
reader who's gagging cause...sun wukong wasn't in love with nobody and why is there a brief fucking romance plotline with the monkey 2.0 wasn't this a fighting game ewew get it AWAAAAY
reader who hates and then...uh oh. too much dumplings is making them choke....guys...guys i think they're dying??
reader who wakes up in bmw or lmk as some... rabbit spirit? (so weird) but absolutely SEETHING at being here because oh fuck this bitch ass god awful plot suck my cock we are NOT DOING THIS
reader deciding that avoiding the obnoxious characters would definitely be better for their sanity....only for some blasted loud ass obnoxious stupid cunt fucking google translated voice pings in their head... telling them if they don't participate in the plot they'll be executed
reader thinking they'd rather die but then the system goes "oh, you thought we were joking?" and gives them the worst experience ever that by the end of it they have to swallow their pride and participate in the plot....☹️ Unfortunately
reader who accidentally wifes up the characters and has to deal with everyone forgetting their roles...and the system threatening them about the plot too like bro how is this my fault these bitches are dumb? fuck you mean you're gonna kill me ag- no, no, you're right uh i'll fix it i'll fix it.
Anyways I'm gonna write a fanfic with an OC like this cause it's too funny to pass up and also I'm 100% gonna die with my wipes hahahaha fuck..
#❀ ᭢᜴꤬archon's above#lego monkie kid#monkie kid kid#black myth wukong#bmw sun wukong#sun wukong x reader#destined one x reader#erlang shen x reader#bmw erlang shen#bmw erlang shen x reader#jttw#monkey king#lmk sun wukong#lmk mk#mk x reader#nezha x reader#black myth wukong x reader#lego monkie kid x reader#azure lion x reader#wow i have not used this tag in a long time#svsss mentioned bc i love that book#reader is defo shen jiu/shen yuan reincarnated :>
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Hear Me Out
Guys, just, hear me out: YouTubers/Streamers AU for COD. There was a series of posts on @cod-dump 's blog about what games are banned for the boys and I've just been thinking about this but with Ghost, Gaz, Soap, and Alex where one of them is the actual streamer/gamer dude and the others just almost always play with him (maybe Roach if we went on the path that he's not actually mute, just kinda hates talking)
Retired or discharged for whatever reasons, the 141 are actually kinda happy to be living semi-normal lives. Maybe they're not all entirely civilian now, maybe Price has a position that doesn't require him to be on the field but he's still teaching/being a Captain.
But he's constantly telling the boys to find things to do to keep themselves happy. Especially Gaz and Soap, cause the military is kind of all they know, they've never had to be civilians really as adults.
Ghost is transitioning fine, and he's been a huge help for Soap, but Gaz is still kinda struggling. Eventually something happens and Alex is part of his life, but it's still not really what Gaz needs to feel "normal".
So Soap and Alex convince Gaz to start streaming/recording videos of their gaming sessions. It's a slow start, and Gaz is getting frustrated.
Until one time they play something silly but incredibly rage-inducing. It's a trending game because it's designed to pit you against your friends but is still silly nonetheless. There's one clip in particular that starts trending and becomes the reason Gaz's channel starts to take off.
The clip? Gaz yelling at Soap for something and Soap immediately just cursing him out in straight Scots only for Alex, an American, to scream into his mic as loud as humanly possible "WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETER?!?!" after having been dead silent for the last 2 minutes. Why did he scream this? Not because of Soap's Scots, but because he had secretly just won the round after having lost the entire time they'd been playing.
People eat that shit up! Suddenly everyone's like "damn there's this hella attractive dude that records gameplay with his friends and they're all really funny." Everyone falls in love with Gaz's appearance first, but then they actually hear him and his friends interact and it's just trading insults and stupid jokes, acting like there's no one watching and they're suddenly kids again.
It eventually comes out that Gaz and his friends are all veterans, and despite the air around military not being the best, there's no denying that caring for veterans is a must. People slowly start to support Gaz's channel/streams, and before he knows it, he's actually got quite the following. His whole thing is about "wanting to do something to distract himself and others from the shitty aspects of life with a few laughs and some good games"
Eventually they convince Ghost to start gaming with them. It makes Gaz's popularity grow because now there's this really deep accent in the mix that's completely clueless as to what he's doing like 90% of the time (I just have this gut feeling that '22 Ghost is so fucking awful at video games) that they refer to simply as "Ghost". Suddenly, the chaos Gaz and his friends are known for increases tenfold. Ghost is flirting with all of them, Soap is arguing with him over literal couple things that come with living together, and there's a new element of really dark humor that wasn't there before (there was dark humor, just not this dark)
They're playing The Backrooms one time. They're not even in the game yet, just in the lobby. Gaz is laughing at Alex's tag for the game "MYLEG!" which is a reference to that one fish in Spongebob always yelling "my leg!" after an incident. Gaz is laughing too hard to actually explain to his viewers that, yes, Alex is an amputee. Soap starts making fun of him, as usual, and that's when it happens.
Alex: "I'll take my leg off and hit you with it, Soap, I swear to god." Soap: "I forgot you were already missing one for a second there and got real concerned." Alex: "No, Soap, I planned on removing my other leg. The one that's still attached, yeah. Just like a lil *pop noise*, ya know?" Gaz: *wheezing so hard he almost throws up*
Then they're playing this silly monster/cryptid hunter game called "A Day Out" and there's skeletons every now and then on the map. Gaz walks up to one and just starts freaking out, saying Ghost's name over and over.
Ghost, freaked out: What?? Gaz, pointing at the skeleton: Look, it's you! *cackling* Ghost, after a concerning long pause: *quietly* Nah, I'm not gonna say that Alex: SAY IT COWARD Ghost: No, that's my brother *Gaz making the most horrified face as he tries not to laugh* *Alex and Soap are losing their shit* Gaz: NAH THAT'S NOT OKAY
That clip posts and the internet looses it. I see this being the actual first video Ghost is in, so for this to be the first thing the viewers get of him, it's safe to say he's a hit. It's also never explained that Ghost does have a deceased brother, so there's just an acceptance of Ghost's skeleton brother.
There's several times where they've all gotten together and played silly games like Mario Kart when there's a bunch of them. There's the sober one and there's the drunk one, where there's so many different languages being hurled as curses at each other, Gaz gives up on captioning ANY of it.
OOOOooooooooohhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! WHAT IF! Roach becomes his editor once he gets popular enough so he can spend more time playing games, solo ones when the others are working.
For a while, everyone's going crazy wanting to see what the others all look like, and sometimes (cause we're assuming the world they live in now during all this is a lot better), they're joined by Rudy or Alejandro, or both in one rare instance. Sometimes, for old times's sake, during the drunk gaming sessions, they'll call Laswell only for her to scold them. There are times they'll bully Roach who always, as the editor, changes their words from the insults to compliments. Or he definitely trolls Gaz a lot with some of the editing, and it's all around just a good time. Hence why everyone wants to know what they look like.
Then it's around the holidays after about 2 and a half years of Gaz's channel being as popular as it is. He posts a single picture on his socials with a group of people and the caption: "Love seeing the boys over the holidays."
It's such a nice photo; Alex with an arm wrapped around Gaz's shoulders, Soap and Ghost on his other side with Roach between Soap and Gaz.
And the internet has once again gone crazy. Why? Cause not only are these dudes fucking hilarious, but they're hot and taken.
Except, as they all end up teasing him about, Roach is very much still single XD
I have been watching too much YouTube lately, can y'all tell?? Haha anyways back to my hole I shall crawl
#I don't know what this is#I just kinda threw something up cause the brainworms need to be released regularly#kyle gaz garrick#cod gaz#gaz cod#gaz call of duty#gaz modern warfare#gaz mw2#gaz is a gamer#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#soapghost#ghostsoap#alex keller#call of duty alex keller#gazalex#au?#civilian au#cod incorrect quotes
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