#then went all their way to be ableist and say he’s not fully human because of his arm💀

[ghost-sin]

Unserious Conversation I had on twitter

(Movie was good btw)

[fierceawakening]

Like here is the thing about “you don’t choose whether you are mentally ill , but you do choose to be an asshole.”

Sometimes mental illness has the symptom of irrationality.

Take my cousin. Does he talk about the government threatening everyone because he chooses to be an asshole, or because paranoia makes him believe certain things that take a reasonable concern (most governments DO hide unethical things they do) and distort it into something unreasonable and illogical (Joe Biden specifically wants X group to suffer intensely)?

“Choosing to be an asshole” only makes sense if the person is generally rational. If their illness affects their ability to reason in itself, it can’t be that they weigh their options and choose the meanest one. That’s not how that works. That implies they aren’t fully able to weigh the options properly!

And THAT is why I think it’s not necessarily ableist to talk about how these things affect others around them. Because dealing with someone who’s bring fundamentally irrational ACTUALLY IS draining and exhausting.

Because discussions literally get nowhere. When we have discussions, we do it with the assumption that each party will change their mind a little or at least be willing to compromise. The time invested in discussion isn’t wasted because each person understands that the other has a point, or at least a point of view.

But if someone is irrational, that goes out the window. There’s no guarantee that the other person is willing to negotiate, or is even CAPABLE of experiencing negotiation as non threatening.

I remember once I had a discussion with someone on here who said she had NPD (of course I have no way of knowing if she had a diagnosis or a careful self dx or just a suspicion or, you know, maybe lied.) And she was trying to get me to be less “ableist” by saying “my grandiosity isn’t about wanting to lord it over others. It’s that I am so perfectionistic I can’t bear the thought that the truth is I’m not perfect, so I tell myself I AM perfect to forestall that pain.”

And I was just like…

That’s understandable! Yes! I too am self destructively perfectionist and it causes me great pain also! That makes you sound less scary and more relatable than the stereotype. Yes! All that!

But if you literally mean that you actually cannot bear to think of yourself as imperfect and have to immediately assert that your interlocutor is the one in the wrong: that is a conflict waiting to happen. Because sooner or later if we continue to interact, I’m going to eventually be disappointed by something and point it out, simply because we’re both human.

And if your response to that is that you are perfect, and cannot have erred, then your response isn’t going to be an apology or an acknowledgment. It’s going to be lashing out a4 me for pointing out that you’re imperfect, because you can’t tolerate that thought.

Which is going to mean that I’m going to find the interaction draining, most likely. Because I went into it expecting that you can “choose not to be an asshole” and be rational, where you can’t because from what you’re saying, “you messed up” is a berserk button that kicks you into irrationality.

THAT’S why I dislike discourse on here about severe mental illness. Because everybody talks like “choose to be an asshole” is a thing, without recognizing that cognitive distortions are ALSO a thing, and can skew that choice if they’re severe enough.

[fallloverfic]

I'd have to see what someone is pointing out by going more deeply into the snake body of the dungeon version of Sultha + how this reflects on Mithrun's choices because I've never heard of that before. My understanding is that we know so little about Sultha that that kind of symbolism is a bit of a stretch, but if he did pick something that can look dangerous or something, there's some understandable reasons. It's possible he picked a creature that would survive against travelers in the dungeon to combine her with. A lot of people refer to that form as a lamia, which is kind of like a siren. Mithrun already imagined that Sultha went behind his back while he was gone to be with the brother. That's simple enough to frame her as a siren, regardless of whatever she was like. His suspecting her and perhaps his brother also doesn't really reflect on his opinion of Milsiril or people in general. He just didn't really trust the lover's motives/feelings.

More importantly, I disagree with that description of Milsiril's behavior about Mithrun.

I don't think noting that someone isn't perfect and that they're actually flawed is sadistic, and I don't think anyone is painting her as benevolent. I also don't think she delights in how far he's fallen.

She was very clearly jealous of him, and that's one reason she avoided him: that she hated him because of how perfect he was, and the bullying she faced by other elves in the Canaries is why she hates other elves, and intentionally lives apart from others after retirement (Adventurer's Bible p.80). It makes sense she'd be jealous of someone who was seemingly charismatic, charmed his way around people, was pretty, powerful, and seemingly never talked about his issues to the point he appeared to have none at all. Who hasn't been jealous of someone with fewer problems to deal with?

It's pretty normal to be shocked when someone you hold up on a pedestal isn't actually perfect. This is the first time she's seeing into him as a person, rather than the facade he holds up to others. It makes him seem far more grounded and like someone she could talk to. That's not sadism. That's humanization and empathy. Her words as she's smiling are clearly regretful. She's not delighting. She's clearly sad. They are both flawed people who have inferiority complexes and experience jealousy and anger: their similarities are why they literally "might have hit it off pretty well." Because of how nonresponsive and different he is now, and how uninterested he is in connecting with anyone, they potentially both lost a chance at friendship, and perhaps a betterment of both their circumstances (e.g., maybe they both wouldn't have been so miserable before he became the dungeon lord). As is, now it's a fight to get him to even engage with anything, or find a reason to live. Friendship comes secondary to getting him to not waste to death. (Not to say they can't be friends now, but that friendship will likely be different than it was if they'd Milsiril had tried to be friends before).

If this is referring to the corpse comment, I don't see that either as "telling Mithrun he was all but worthless now and taking delight in how far he's fallen in her opinion".

She looks grave and even a bit sad. Calling him a corpse isn't calling him worthless, it's noting his current state (if anything, it's maybe a bit ableist, but I also kind of theorize she's trying to insult him into moving, because she knows he at least used to be prideful, and clearly 19 years of everything else hasn't worked; she's very much a brute force caretaker in some ways, as shown with Kabru). He's essentially comatose and bedbound without aid (he can't feed himself, and in Daydream Hour it's shown he can't wash himself, either, he can't move far without aid, and he can't be trusted with dangerous objects). He's also pretty non-verbal. She can probably tell he's awake but he's not responding to her entering the room in even the slightest way. He's "fully" recovered, but he might as well be dead, which he probably agrees isn't recovery.

And overall, she's sad. Like I said earlier, "If you look at Milsiril's expression in that last panel, she is sad. She knows how terrible this is. She also knows this is the best they can do for him". She doesn't like seeing him brought so low, and essentially living as a corpse - this is almost worse than the reason she gave for nearly mercy-killing him (to her). She doesn't like that getting him back into dungeons is the best route she can offer him, because all her other means of trying to get him up and back into action aren't working.

Having reasonable reasons for what she does doesn't make her benevolent. She's a soldier who reached out to help a former comrade for perhaps any number of quite normal reasons, and the one way she could find to help really sucks, and she knows it, and she isn't happy about it. Perhaps she could have reached out to other, non-elven healers, but she didn't do that, either. But being capable of jealousy and hatred, and being bad at healing (which isn't her job, she's a swordswoman) doesn't make her sadistic. She seems more practical than anything else, which is pretty neutral, depending on the circumstances.

So I've been thinking lately about how Mithrun is Kabru's dark mirror (more on that another time- it needs its own post), and I thought it interesting that one of their parallels is that they were both cared for by Milsiril, but in opposite directions. She took Kabru in as her foster after he was orphaned and tried to convince him not to become an adventurer. On the flip side, she helped rehabilitate Mithrun specifically so that he could rejoin the Canaries.

And I kept wondering: why?

For Kabru, obviously she loves him a whole lot- despite any other shortcomings in their relationship, I do believe that.

So I get why she tries to convince him not to go dungeoning, and, failing that, at least prepares him as thoroughly as she can.

But why help Mithrun? She used to hate Mithrun, but after realizing what a secretly twisted person he was, she actually thought of him more positively (oh, Milsiril). So it wasn't as if she held the kind of grudge that might motivate her to make his already-depleted life even more miserable by sending him back to the dungeons. And it wasn't that she felt bad for him either, since she didn't visit Mithrun for the first ~20 years of his recovery.

The Adventurer's Bible says that Utaya was the impetus for Mithrun returning to the Canaries, but Milsiril is the one who made the trip to see him and tell him about it.

Why would Milsiril work so hard to get her old coworker back into fighting fit? Why encourage him to return to such a dangerous lifestyle, when she was the one who chose not to mercy-kill him?

That last panel is such a crazy thing to hint at and then never elaborate on. Without it we could have just thought that Milsiril wanted the Canaries' work to continue without her, even if it seemed out of character. I think some people even assume she's just a natural caretaker as a foster mom and handwave it to include nursing Mithrun too. What could Milsiril's suspicious motives be? What does she gain from Mithrun joining the Canaries that isn't an altruistic desire to see dungeons safely sealed? Feeling a sense of responsibility for the work she left behind isn't an ulterior motive.

My theory is: Milsiril, knowing that Mithrun was empty save for the burning desire to face the demon again, wound him up like a clockwork doll and pointed him back at the dungeons.

Hoping that he'd eliminate the biggest threat to Kabru's life, before it was too late for him.

Milsiril the puppetmaster.

[hatari-translations]

can you maybe tell us a bit more about the parties in icelandic politics? that is super interesting for me after reading your last post

Well, sure! Please bear in mind that as you may have gathered I am not unbiased, and I'm by no means the most knowledgeable person about this.

Sjálfstæðisflokkurinn (The Independence Party)

Originally founded in 1929, this party's name originally referred to independence from Denmark (achieved in 1944), but today it's just Iceland's dominant right-wing party. On other countries' scales they're fairly center-right in terms of policies; they want a strong welfare system, they're pro-immigration, they're not against LGBT rights, etc. However, they are very much the party of Iceland's rich elite establishment, and in particular have close ties to Iceland's largest corporations, and every other political scandal involves them being varying degrees of terrible, from "Independence Party minister breaking COVID restrictions" to "Independence Party minister in the Panama Papers" to "Independence Party minister's father signs a letter to 'restore the honor' of a convicted pedophile" (these three were all the same minister, who by the way still leads the party and is still finance minister) to "terrible corrupt fishing company Samherji introduced the Independence Party's health minister as 'our guy in the government' at meetings with the Namibian officials they were bribing".

The Independence Party opposes the new constitution, ostensibly because blah blah stability distractions about how changes to the constitution need to be approved through the appropriate process (yes, we know, we want that process to happen), but we all know it's really because the new constitution would have the fishing companies pay a fair price for their access to Iceland's natural resources, and that would be bad for their bottom line. They are also opposed to joining the EU.

The Independence Party has been the largest party in every single Icelandic election since it was founded except the 2009 one (which was right on the heels of another scandal - believe me, I barely scratched the surface above - as well as the 2008 financial crisis), where they managed to dip below the Social-Democratic Alliance with 23.7% of the vote, their lowest parliamentary election result ever. Historically they'd get upwards of 40% or even more of the vote; these days it's more like 25%, and this election's result of 24.4% is their second lowest ever. Even in polls days right after a huge scandal, the lowest I've ever seen the Independence Party poll at was something like 19%; that's why I've said here that 20% of the country will just vote for them no matter what. This means the Independence Party is always the most powerful party, and them not being in the government coalition is very much the exception.

Framsóknarflokkurinn (The Progressive Party)

Iceland's oldest political party, founded in 1916. Originally it was the farmers' party, and they've historically been most popular in rural areas, where they have longstanding loyalty. They're more or less center to center-right. Historically, they've formed coalitions with both the right and the left, but particularly in the past few decades they have been glued to the Independence Party in particular. They have occasional particular pet issues that they latch onto, but overall it doesn't really feel like they stand for much of anything in particular, other than wanting to maintain the status quo and be in government with (preferably) the Independence Party. They are also against the new constitution and the EU.

Vinstrihreyfingin - grænt framboð (The Left-Green Movement)

Founded in a 1999 split on the left, the Left-Greens are a left-wing party with a focus on equality and the environment, but with enough of a semi-conservative bent to have some common ground with Independence and Progressives on matters like opposing EU membership and being hesitant about the Constitutional Committee's draft constitution. A lot of their voters were very unhappy with them entering into the current coalition with the Independence Party and the Progressive Party (the former in particular); two of their MPs actually left the party after that decision, reducing but not destroying the government's majority.

Samfylkingin (The Social-Democratic Alliance)

Founded in 2000 as a fusion of two parties (hence the 'alliance'), the Social-Democratic Alliance is a center-left social democratic party. They were very popular in the early 2000s, almost rivaling the Independence Party for votes, and formed a coalition government with Independence in 2007, which oversaw the 2008 financial crisis; initially people mostly blamed the Independence Party, allowing the Alliance to become the biggest party in the 2009 election with 29.8% of the vote, but as the following coalition with the Left-Greens had to deal with the fallout of the recession, a lot of anger was directed at the Alliance too, and the party has never managed to recover since, instead hovering between 5-15% of the vote (but still stands strong in some municipal elections and currently leads the Reykjavík city council). They want to join the EU and ratify the new constitution.

Píratar (The Pirate Party of Iceland)

You may have heard of Pirate Parties before, originating with the Pirate Party of Sweden. Iceland is the only country where the Pirate Party has actually managed to get elected to the national parliament, and is an entirely serious political movement. At one point after the revelation of the Panama Papers, the Pirate Party was miraculously polling at 43%; sadly, by the time there was an actual election they'd gone down to 15%. Their primary concerns are transparency, democracy, privacy, human rights and freedoms, and "no bullshit", and among other things they want to establish a universal basic income. A lot of its founders were computer scientists and geeks of various stripes.

They refuse to be classified on the left-right scale, but in practice, their policies are strongly aligned with the leftier parties (one popular website comparing the parties on concrete policy questions for this election classed them as having 90% agreement with the Social-Democratic Alliance, 87% with the Socialists, and 83% with the Left-Greens). They are strongly in favor of ratifying the new constitution.

Miðflokkurinn (The Center Party)

After the 2008 financial crisis, the Progressive Party gained a more populist bent, led by Sigmundur Davíð Gunnlaugsson, who was prime minister from 2013 until 2016 when he was implicated in the Panama Papers. He was reluctant to resign as prime minister and fully intended to stay as the leader of the party, until the party chose to boot him and replace him with current Progressive leader Sigurður Ingi Jóhannsson; Sigmundur Davíð went off to form his own party instead, the Center Party, and took the populist arm of the Progressive Party with him. They're where most of the anti-immigration and anti-LGBTQ vote goes, and along with the People's Party, some of their MPs were implicated in "Klausturgate", a scandal where a disabled woman at a bar overheard and discreetly recorded several MPs (including Sigmundur Davíð) who were drinking together while making a variety of sexist, homophobic and ableist comments about named people including members of their own parties. The Center Party was perfectly happy to keep them on board, which really says all you need to know.

I am unendingly disappointed that the Center Party managed to scrape past the 5% threshold to get parliamentary seats this election; for a glorious moment the early numbers looked like they wouldn't. Last election they managed to get seven MPs, and then the two guys from the People's Party involved in Klausturgate joined up with the Center Party too, giving them nine, so seeing them reduced to almost nothing was still deeply pleasing.

Viðreisn (The Reform Party)

A center-right party that split off from the Independence Party in 2016, largely over the latter's opposition to the EU, while the Reform Party supports EU membership, but also because of the endless scandals, cronyism, etc. The Reform Party instead claim to be proponents of "ethical capitalism" and have so far avoided the major scandals and general douchebaggery of their parent party.

Flokkur fólksins (The People's Party)

A populist party with a primary emphasis on eradicating poverty, especially for the elderly and disabled, letting the nation reap the benefits of our fish instead of the few large fishing companies, funding health care to reduce wait times, and so on. All this is lovely in theory, but unfortunately their rhetoric then goes off into pitting the poor/elderly/disabled against immigrants, Muslims, etc. Chairperson Inga Sæland seems totally well-meaning to me off what I've seen of her (disclaimer: have not actually seen that much), but it also contains less savoury people and sentiments, as seen by two of their MPs being part of the aforementioned Klausturgate. To the party's credit, they did expel those guys, but it's not the only example of the party attracting questionable people.

Sósíalistaflokkur Íslands (The Icelandic Socialist Party)

A hardline democratic socialist party founded in 2017, with this as their first parliamentary election. It looked like they would get MPs in polls, but in the end they didn't. They're led by Gunnar Smári Egilsson, one of the original founders of free newspaper Fréttablaðið, and have a much more radical left rhetoric going on than the other lefty parties, focusing on economic equality, housing, free health care, and a shorter work week. They made some pretty controversial remarks campaigning for this election, such as suggesting replacing all the judges of the Supreme Court if they won't agree to changing the fishing quota system (the argument being that the Independence Party appointed all the judges in an organized bid to maintain the current system), but who knows if that dampened their following or something else. They also want to ratify the new constitution.

[softcannoli]

you are the person who got me to watch the untamed and now I am BEGGING you to tell me what guardian is and where I can watch it.. is there time travel because sometimes I see two gifsets that do not seem like they're from the same show

ooohhhhhhhhohohohohohohohoohohhooo ohhhhhhh boy where do i even start

so uhhhhh Guardian is an on-fire trashcan of a show and also the only thing I've been able to think about for like a month. It's based on the novel of the same name by Priest, which I have not yet read but have heard is very good.

I say "based on" bc I have been given to understand that it is a VERY loose adaptation, bc the novel is pretty much entirely about That Gay Shit™, the undead, reincarnation, and literal gods, all of which IIRC are big no-nos under censorship laws. So the show had to get a little creative, and so now it's about aliens? and time travel? sort of? It's weird, but that's okay, because the show is far more interested in the homoerotic subtext, of which there is OODLES.

So basically our two main characters are:

Zhao Yunlan, who is a regular human dude who is in charge of Special Investigations Department, or SID, which is essentially the department of Supernatural Monster Cops, who are responsible for making sure superpowered underground alien people don't come up to the surface and run roughshod over regular humans, and

Shen Wei, a mild-mannered university professor who is Actually Ten Thousand Years Old, and is also secretly a superpowered underground alien person. He knew a dude 10,000 years ago who looks exactly like Zhao Yunlan for unknown (timey-wimey) reasons, and was very obviously in love with him, so when he meets Zhao Yunlan he is IMMEDIATELY lost in the yearning.

There's also a bunch of other people who work under Zhao Yunlan in the SID, and they are all absolutely delightful and have a whole found-family sort of dynamic going on.

Is this a good show? I think if I'm being totally honest I would have to say no? But is terrible in a bunch of truly delightful ways. The CGI is literally shit-tier. Some of the props could not more obviously be made out of craft foam and paper-mache. The quality of the dubbing work is really uneven, and by the last 15 episodes or so they seem to completely give up and some of the lines are dubbed over by someone who is CLEARLY not the same voice are the person speaking. A lot of the writing choices make NO sense, and the plot starts to go completely off the rails somewhere just past the halfway point. (there's also some stuff that is bad in like, a bad way, but I'll talk about that a bit at the end of the post)

The thing about this show is that it's gay. Like GAY gay. Like The Untamed was pretty gay, but I could conceivably see someone cover their ears and shut their eyes to all the gay subtext in that show and convince themselves there's a heterosexual explanation for everything. Not so with Guardian. Like, I really, legitimately cannot fathom even the most willfully ignorant person not picking up on the vibes between Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei. I simply cannot picture it. There is, in fact, NO heterosexual explanation for them.

The show throws in the most flimsy, half-hearted nods to the idea that Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei are just Good Platonic Buddies, and then in the next scene will just drop in a 5-10 minute sequence of Shen Wei taking a sick Zhao Yunlan home, tucking him into bed, staring at his sleeping face with a face full of tenderness and longing, and then cleaning his apartment and folding his laundry for him. It's fucking unreal.

The show was very clearly trying to push the limits of subtext to see exactly how much they could get away with, and as far as I can tell the answer they got was "not that much", bc I've heard some suggestion that the show was pulled shortly after broadcast for another round of edits.

So it's on Viki, but if you don't want to pay for a streaming service and don't mind sliiiightly sketchier subs, it's also on Youtube! It might be some other places too, but those are the ones I know about.

I'm going to stop now bc this post could seriously be like 5 times longer but please watch Guardian and join me in my daily cries about Shen Wei (Zhao Yunlan can come too I guess, but it's mostly about Shen Wei, bc of the inherent eroticism of loyalty and life debts)

Lastly, bc I would be remiss not to mention it, here's some warnings about the worst things I can remember off the top of my head. I personally still think the show was well worth watching, but there's a few things I sort of wish I had known going into it, beyond the vague warning "the ending sucks". It's gonna be spoilers, so read at your own risk.

There's some talk about suicide in the first arc which isn't really that bad in the grand scheme of things, but can come across as dismissive and/or insensitive. There's an arc somewhere in the mid-20s that leans on some really ableist "split-personality" tropes. I will fully admit that the only thing that kept me watching at that point was the knowledge that this would be over in an episode or two, and the fact that the youtube subtitles translated comments about other character's behavior as "cringe", which I found an extremely funny translation choice.

And lastly, the finale. The finale is bad in a number of ways, but the biggest and easiest to explain is that the show goes full Bury Your Gays and kills off both Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan. ( and then another entity takes control of Zhao Yunlan's body?? so the general public doesn't actually know he's dead?? which I found pretty uncomfortable) But like basically my view of the ending is that if something bad happened, No It Didn't. Which seems to be the general opinion, since apparently Priest went back and wrote an extra epilogue chapter to fix the drama's ending.

[lit-in-thy-heart]

you know what, what's the point of being on this platform if you don't get to bellow into the void about your interests in the hope of finding someone with the same interest?

in light of this, let me inflict a lowdown of the victorian literature (mostly novels because poetry is difficult to collate) that i've read for my module this year upon my mutuals

i'll do a separate one for vampire novels and reblog with the link

because what are the victorians without vampires? straight

bleak house (dickens): what a ride that was! yes, it was nearly a thousand pages and, yes, some chapters i was like can we move on please, but that's dickens for you. honestly, i loved it. if you're looking for thinly-veiled lesbianism, this is the book for you (esda all the way, if they even have a ship name). unfortunately i already knew one of the plot twists due to watching dickensian five years before, but there are plenty more to go around! if you can get through the first chapter describing nothing but fog and the law courts, you're in for one hell of a treat -- just don't google anything about it until you've finished because you will get spoiled (or don't share a house with me, where i'll tell you the entire plot as i'm reading it). definitely recommend, but marking it down for the heteronormativity with allan. (9.5/10)

villette (c. brontë): where to fucking start. i, quite frankly, do not care for charlotte brontë, and when reading the earlier novel agnes grey by anne, i could see some more things that charlotte has filched for this travesty. no victorian novel is going to be without problems, but this one was xenophobic, ableist and, of course, racist. the protagonist doesn't really give anything away, which is meant to make her more mysterious, but it just renders her an empty vessel. oh, and she tells you stuff that she's figured out waaaaaay after she says she's figured it out, a bit like she's allowing you to feel smart for making a connection before going 'oh yeah i knew that like twelve chapters ago, keep up'. some of the passages are really striking and there's maybe one character who's likeable but that's about it. i'd say it's more a story of omission than repression tbh. (4/10)

janet's repentance (eliot): wait, have i even finished this? no, no, i have not. it's fine, i wasn't going to tell you the ending anyway. i did get hooked eventually, there were just a LOT of names thrown around in the first few chapters, and a word that i didn't know was used frequently (turns out it was a name for the followers of this guy). i did get strong hester prynne/arthur dimmesdale vibes from some of the main characters, but janet is a very sympathetic character which, after reading villette, was nice. slightly depressing in some places, but a good enough read if you're not cramming it in the day before your tutorial, because it is mildly dense. (7/10)

the wonderful adventures of mrs seacole in many lands (seacole): not what i'd been expecting to read on my module, what with it being a biography, but enjoyable nonetheless. horrible histories lied to me, though, she was in her 40s/50s when she treated people in the crimean war, not in her 20s, but that's minor. it was actually quite funny??? like she was very reluctant to give away to give away her age and almost slipped up a couple of times, and also made some very biting remarks about people who were passing comment on her skin colour. for a biography, it wasn't hugely biographical, in that she was married for what seemed all of five minutes before her husband died, when in fact they were married for several years, but if you want an in-depth depiction of war, this is for you. not what i'd usually read, but some of the descriptions are so vivid that it does read like a novel in places, though sometimes the descriptions were so detailed that i did tune out at odd intervals. (9/10)

the happy prince and other stories (wilde): if you're feeling low, don't read these. don't. especially not 'the nightingale and the rose', because that was honestly heartbreaking. really well-written, some passages were just beautiful, i just wasn't in the right headspace to fully appreciate it. it also has a lot of death, i should probably explicitly say that. (8/10)

agnes grey (a. brontë): chef's kiss, honestly. if i'd read this last year then i think it definitely would have hit a lot harder, what with agnes moving away from home for the first time and struggling with loneliness around people who she is different from. beautifully written, i'm irritated at myself for not reading it sooner, even though i've owned a copy for about four years or so. agnes does come across as a bit wet sometimes, but those moments are rare and far between, she's overall a resilient character who is trying to make her own way in the world. seeing as i managed to get through the whole thing and didn't lose focus on what i was reading, i rate it higher than jane eyre (which is a rip-off of this anyway). we stan anne. though i am marking it down for the underdeveloped romantic relationship that just pops up (9.5/10)

now for some old classics that weren't taught on my module, but i can't not mention them

a tale of two cities (dickens): this was my first dickens book and oh my word what a book. yeah, okay, lucie is a bit of a wet dishcloth and has basically no personality, but there is definitely something there between her and her maid. sydney is my baby and oh so gorgeously dramatic ("you have kindled me, heap of ashes that i am, into fire"), which was perfect for the pangs of unrequited love. the plot is slightly confusing, and you don't really understand everything until right near the end, but i loved finding parallels in the chapters set in france with the chapters set in britain. oh and the showdown between miss pross and madame defarge is wonderful. i had a tradition of reading it on the run-up to christmas, just because that was the period when i read it for the first time, but i haven't done that for the past two years just because of exams and stuff. now, bleak house just pips it at the post, but i still love it dearly. (9/10)

wuthering heights (e. brontë): i couldn't review victorian literature and not include this. there are very strong similarities between this and villette (seems charlotte really drew on her sisters' work), particularly in terms of me not liking a single one of the characters except hareton. everyone is called cathy. literally. and heathcliff/cathy one is a toxic ship that should not be boarded. it is obsession, not love. the second volume is basically a repeat of the first one, thus showing that humanity will never move past its vices and will be caught in a vicious cycle of self-destruction for the rest of time. again, though, beautifully and vividly written. the characters are the type that you love to hate. (8/10)

the tenant of wildfell hall (a. brontë): what. a. book. this was a book that was simultaneously loved and condemned as scandalous when it came out. there's mystery, there's a woman escaping a horrible situation and making her own living, and there's a well-developed relationship! and the characters are likeable (i love rose, she's great, completely goes off at her brother when she has to do things for him all the time), which always puts it onto a winner. there's one chapter with gilbert that i have to skip just because i hate what he does in it. there are quite a lot of religious references, with redemption playing a huge part in the novel, but even the religious views brontë expresses went against a lot of the teachings of the anglican church at the time. do i even need to say that it's beautifully written if it's anne? marking it down for gilbert's behaviour and arguable control of helen's narrative. (9.5/10)

far from the madding crowd (hardy): i love this book. a little more uplifting than tess but still with the drama and murder you'd expect from hardy. maybe my review is influenced by my tiny crush on bathsheba: she's not the best role model but damn what a woman. gabriel isn't quite bae but i love him all the same, i'm so glad he's happy in the end. (9/10)

[ultimateloserboy]

jesus christ bro!! calling me vile is crazy!! im sorry if i was mean in my first post, i know i was being a bit immature but damn dude. let me explain why you misread my first post:

first of all, this is ironic, because your entire post is about the character they gave him AFTER the original game. my first post was specifically about the original game. before anything else dropped.

In the og game he attacked EVERYTHING. alice was terrified of him, so was everything else. because he didnt aim for henry AT ALL. he aimed for ANYTHING around him. they may have retconned this, but in the og game he was never a sentient person and i know this because i loved the game since its alpha. you can pretend he was always a certain way all you want but the truth is that og bendy, maybe not now, was just attacking anything.

also yes! you can not be fully sentient and still feel things like rage and stuff!! thats not me being contradicting, its just complexity!

also im genuinely sorry if you think i was insulting random people, but that post was about people who sexualize everything for the sake of it. and again, let me reiterate, i went out of my way to say nobody who has a crush on him or whatever is a zoo or something because i agree, thats insane. i was saying how he fell victim to an internet-wide sexualization that made people blind to his og character. NOT his tdr one. thats the whole point man. JUST his og one. THE ORIGINAL BEFORE THE OTHER GAMES CAME OUT.

i also said that it makes me upset how the va and other things have said he is “flirty” or something because hey! what! how was that ever apart of his character? at all?

also, im kind of sickened at the idea i implied that people who cant speak are infants or something?? THATS vile, i never said that. and tom cant talk and hes perfectly sentient, so why the fuck does bendy act nothing like him? and dont say personality because.. guess what.. og bendy has no distinct human personality!! let me say it again. ORIGINAL… BENDY.. NOT TDR!!!!!!!!

“no canon says this!” dude!!!! literally watch the first game and only the first game!!!!!! without thinking about anything that came after!!! because i played the og game before anything else was developed and hes COMPLETELY different! you have hindsight bias!

all the insults in my first post were made specifically for people who sexualize everything and make everyone around them uncomfortable, you can literally see in my replies that there are people who “crush” on him and i didnt say anything bad to them because they arent hurting anyone as long as they arent ACTUALLY weird!! and by weird i meant, again, sexualizing everything!

YOUR insults are directed specifically at me, so tell me again that you hate when people are insulted randomly..

and telling me to get out of the fandom is hilarious considering i just said im not in it anymore because as i minor i was driven out by constant nsfw!

also telling me to talk about actual sexual predators is ridiculous considering i wasnt trying to call anyone out or spread awareness, i was just venting the frustrations i had as a child! also I WASNT CALLING ANYONE A FUCKING PREDATOR?!!?

Keep in mind this is all about bendy, from bendy and the fucking ink machine! and rethink why youre implying im “vile” and downright ableist because i hate the retconning of his ORIGINAL character i grew up with!! this wasnt about you man idk why you got so offended, genuinely!

and PS, as an abuse victim, you trying to say im downplaying the abuse of fucking BENDY is insane! which, by the way, he wasnt abused in the og game! WHICH MY POST WAS ABOUT!

ok you know what im gonna say it with my full chest. literally nobody talks about bendy (the character) like who he actually is and ive been tired of it since the old game ended. i think hes genuinely one of the most incorrectly fanonized characters like ever at this point. and i genuinely believe it changed the actual canon and it bothers me a lot.

as for the physical version of him/ the ink demon— in the original batim game there was literally a whole plot point about bendy being non-human and how he came out of the machine physically and mentally sloppy compared to the other creations. hes not a fully fledged-out person and that’s LITERALLY an entire section of the original game. he has no human soul or mind, hes sentient but about as much as a gorilla. he attacks like a zombie or an animal with instinct and not like an angry human being. he cant speak because his mouth is fake and he cant walk properly because his limbs are liquid sludge— hes literally an abomination— a mockery of actual human life. its crazy to even call him the “villain” of the story because he doesnt have the thinking ability to genuinely be malicious. its like calling zombies the villains of zombie movies, they cant be because they dont have the brain function to be.

a lot of people ignored the obvious fact that he isnt human-like so they could sexualize him, which isnt as bad as sexualizing an actual animal— im not claiming that— but what bothers me is how the creators made him MORE HUMAN to lean towards these people and ill never think otherwise. yall can argue with me or call me chronically online, but bendy WASNT able to speak or was human-like at all until the dark revival, which was so obviously fan service its not even funny.

im not claiming that people who sexualize bendy are zoos or something— thats too far. what im claiming tho is that this genuinely interesting character was given consciousness and the ability to speak after previously not ever having those things JUST so booktok ass teenagers could swoon over him like they do venom, taking away the interest of his original character. he wasnt fully sentient until it made money for the creators and then suddenly hes speaking poetry in a deep sexy man voice with a fucking 8 pack. how does that not bother anyone? im not even trying to say its morally weird— im just saying its bad writing in general!!! like why do yall let these games ruin characters for fan service and not even give a fuck, and then have the balls to ask why newer ones are so poorly written?? no fucking shot EVERY one of yall was ok with them retconning his entire existence like HES THE MAIN CHARACTER???? DO YALL REALLY WANNA SEXUALIZE EVERYTHING //THAT// BAD TO THE POINT ITS OK TO REWRITE THE ENTIRE MAIN CHARACTER AS LONG AS IT MEANS YOU CAN FINALLY SEXUALIZE HIM CANONICALLY??????

and before people say anything— no i dont think its wrong for bendy to develop a voice or to become more human over time— BUT COME ON DUDE ARE YALL DENSE?? IVE SEEN LESS FAN-SERVICE STARING AT MY GOD DAMN AIR CONDITIONER!!!! they didnt “develop” bendy more— they retconned him to please freaks online!!! surely ONE of yall had to have noticed like… when tdr dropped the sexualization was so bad i genuinely didnt have fun with the series anymore. and I CANT because its justified now! the creators retconned him to be more sexyman so now you cant even argue against it!! literally why cant we have ONE thing online without people wanting to pound every single fucking character??

im sorry if this sounds mean but ive been upset about this for YEARS!! bendy was my favorite character as a kid and NOBODY gives him justice NOT EVEN HIS OWN CREATORS. it would be one thing if there was just a small portion that treated him like this but now its literally everyone and the games lean into it and i just want to explode and die at this point fr.

it genuinely makes me a little ill knowing he was once just a confused, soulless being fighting and killing out of the confusion, rage and fear that his cruel existence caused him to feel, but now hes just a deep voiced venom-ripoff villain whose just a big meanie and hunts you for sport or some stupid shit.

[definitely-not-an-alb]

fanfic tropes! identity porn, friends to enemies to lovers, hurt/comfort, coffeeshop au (don't have to answer them all, pick what you like). hope work went by quickly :)

Ahhh! Thank you, anon!

Identity Porn

How  likely am I to write it: Identity porn isn’t really a narrative kink  for me, so I wouldn’t go out of my way to put it into anything, if it didn't come up naturally. Or if it would be funny.

What characters/ships/fandoms would I write it for: I don’t  really have a lot of fandom I could do identity porn for, too, so that's the next problem I have. RoL doesn't go for it much, and neither do TMA or Witcher or SGA. In the MCU/marvel comics I'm kind of only invested in Characters that just superhero under their legal name, zero fucks given in all canons I'm aware of, so oops there. Hannibal, maybe? Hannibal might work. Altho I prefere season 2 era, with everyone vague degrees of aware of each other's bs and scheming like petty murder divas.

Friends to enemies to lovers

How  likely am I to write it: Very unlikely. I think the only thing with this dynamic I like is Hannibal, as in, both Hannigram and Clannibal and Clannigram, but I don't think I'd really seek it out in fic or write it. I don't even know why, I should be into The Drama Of It All, but I'm just not.

What characters/ships/fandoms would I write it for: Like I said, Hannigram/Clannibal/Clannigram, if it's something that retells an arc. I don't really do Ironstrange, but enemies to lovers or friends to enemies to lovers might be the only way I would, probably. They just don't get along in canon, and I DO NOT UNDERSTAND why people ship it so much. Also why is their Doc always ooc. Enough moaning, I'll stop, I'll stop. Have fun ya'll, but stop the goddamn cross/mass-tagging. There shouldn't be that much Ironstrange in the gen tag, ya hear me?

hurt/comfort

How  likely am I to write it: VERY LIKELY. Hmmmmmm give me that good hurt/comfort.

What characters/ships/fandoms would I write it for: Basically everything, lol. All my faves are idiots who need to be shipped with therapy and tortured with hugs. The Bev & Thomas fic is very hurt comfort-y, as is the Nonromantic-Soulmates WIP. Yes I know I never finish anything, shhhh. There's also an unfinished Strangewong fic in my drafts that's technically sick!fic (I MEAN ... what else lmao) and involves cuddling and soup and being sad about Endgame, so. Which, btw, is THE ONLY reason I will ever acknowledge that dumbassery masquerading as plot. To mine it for FRIDGE HORROR *evil laughter*. And then hand out soup.

coffeeshop au

How  likely am I to write it: Relatively unlikely? I don't really do fluff without plot (and I'm down with emotions as plot or snapshots that reveal something halway and sideways), and incidentally the only version of this trope I ever started would need a Graphic Violence tag lol. (If it wasn't LANGUISHING IN MY DRAFTS.) So I think I might be doing this trope wrong. Also doesn't help that I have experience manning a beer-counter / drink station, so I fall hard in the camp of 'that's an awful place for cute/fluffy shenanigans, have ya'll ever worked customer service lol'-camp. I see the appeal, but I also ... don't.

What characters/ships/fandoms would I write it for: Like I said, the only one I ever started was low-key a joke, because I don't do the trope and the fandom didn't have (and still doesn't have) one, and also because, you know. Graphic violence.

Have the first four or so paragraphs of the very unfinished RoL Demi-Monde Coffeeshop ... pre-canon canon divergence. Is there even a tag for that kinda thing? Anyways. I think the best part about this is getting to write a snotty totally-an-adult!!!-Peter who has zero respect for anything and thinks Thomas is the most ridiculous person he ever met. No graphic violence yet, only canon-typical ableist language.

There’s a lot of reasons people hate working in customer service; The bad pay, the atrocious hours, the customers, the service.

I did about two year of it, first on-and-off positions in some retail shops around where I grew up, punctuated by getting dragged along to my mother’s cleaning gigs, and then later, about a year in a not-actually-fancy Coffee House near Russell Square. And I figured afterwards my stint in customer service and retail had, at the very least, taught my younger self some much needed humility and compassion.

I’m kidding, of course. It just confirmed the suspicions I held towards my fellow humans. Especially the kind that start magic duels in public.

Now, I worked in a Coffee House, not a coffeshop, which meant Management got to price everything even more ridiculous then the rest of the world, we played wannabe-jazz elevator music instead of pop and our clientele wasn’t weird and crazy but more slightly bizarre and very deranged.

Like that one vaguely East-European guy who thought combining windowpane and paisley was a grand idea and who we – that’s the staff – did certainly not call Dracula, or the posh black lady who came to pick up her coffee before heading into the City every morning, except for that one time when, I swear on my dad’s record collection, she was wearing a diving suit under her costume, and of course Mister Stranger-Danger, who was the reason younger cousins didn’t get to do their homework behind the counter any more.

Of course we got your everyday stroll-by white girls and hipsters, but our regulars where, as far as I could tell, decidedly posh, but mostly not yet fully upper class, and also completely batshit looney, is what I’m saying. No offence to actual crazy people, because they certainly don’t dress that badly.

That’s why I didn’t even bat an eyelash when one day someone walked into the shop who was either a time-travelling noir-spy or a runaway extra from Downton Abbey.

He was a white guy, in that inexplicable past-40 age range where I can’t tell their age for the life of me, with a side sweep that must have been held in place with actual pomade, and dressed in one of those sleek looking, old suits with the broad, deep lapels and incredible narrow waists. To round off the impression that he’d come over, lean homoerotically close and tell me the name of the Kraut’s informant any moment now, he’d draped a Burberry over his arm and lugged an actual, honest to god walking cane around the city. It seemed impractical to me, but who am I to judge people’s fashion choices; I’m only the barista.

He also had that stiff demeanour about him, which I’d taken as a sign of something shifty going on anywhere else. Here, in seven out of ten cases, and even more with posh dudes, it meant that he longed to order something utterly ridiculous, with a long name, six ingredient and maybe some speculoos dust uptop, but didn’t have the courage too. Honestly, the way grown men start acting once there’s pumpkin spice on the menu is hilarious – you’d think we’re selling sex toys under the table.

[nesta-stan]

Why the "Trauma and mental illness isn't an excuse" argument about Nesta doesn't make any sense

I don't hate the state but when some one usually says it the thing being excuse are the

ACTUAL SYMPTOMS OF TRAUMA AND MENTAL ILLNESS

Like you do realize that trauma and mental illness isn't a personality trait or this thing that makes you "sad."

I saw a video once that mentioned that comments like this are actually kinda of ableist. Which I think is true.

It reminds me of when I was labeled a "disturbance" when I would breathe and cough very loudly. I have asthma. I was told to try to "control it".

So what I hear when someone says this is "I acknowledge that you have a disease. I just want you to try really hard to pretend you don't by never outwardly displaying your symptoms because it makes me uncomfortable."

Like do people who say this even KNOW what the D in PTSD stands for

" mental health concern becomes a mental illness when ongoing signs and symptoms cause frequent stress and affect your ability to function. A mental illness can make you miserable and can cause problems in your daily life, such as at school or work or in relationships." -Mayo clinic

When someone has a mental illness it can hurt the people they love but their sick. They have a disease. It really isn't their fault. Which is why psychiatrist are considered actual medical doctors who can prescribe medicine.

I did a post with a link how Nsata's "laziness" was linked with depression but here are some more quotes.

Nesta's anger issues as it relates to child abuse

"Physically harmed children (relative to nonphysically harmed children) were significantly less attentive to social cues, more inclined to attribute hostile intent, and less able to manage personal problems. They explain possible cognitive deficits in abused and neglected children by suggesting that physical abuse affects the development of social-information-processing patterns, which in turn lead to chronic aggressive behavior. The experience of severe physical harm is associated with the "acquisition of a set of biased and deficient patterns of processing social provocation information" - the national academies press

Nesta's anger issues as it relates to ptsd

"Anger is also a common response to events that seem unfair or in which you have been made a victim. Research shows that anger can be especially common if you have been betrayed by others. This may be most often seen in cases of trauma that involve exploitation or violence.

The trauma and shock of early childhood abuse often affects how well the survivor learns to control his or her emotions. Problems in this area lead to frequent outbursts of extreme emotions, including anger and rage.

How Can Anger After a Trauma Become a Problem?

In people with PTSD, their response to extreme threat can become "stuck." This may lead to responding to all stress in survival mode. If you have PTSD, you may be more likely to react to any stress with "full activation." You may react as if your life or self were threatened.

This automatic response of irritability and anger in those with PTSD can create serious problems in the workplace and in family life. It can also affect your feelings about yourself and your role in society.

Researchers have broken down posttraumatic anger into three key aspects, discussed below. These three factors can lead someone with PTSD to react with anger, even in situations that do not involve extreme threat:

Arousal

Anger is marked by certain reactions in the body. The systems most closely linked to emotion and survival — heart, circulation, glands, brain — are called into action. Anger is also marked by the muscles becoming tense. If you have PTSD, this higher level of tension and arousal can become your normal state. That means the emotional and physical feelings of anger are more intense.

If you have PTSD, you may often feel on edge, keyed up, or irritable. You may be easily provoked. This high level of arousal may cause you to actually seek out situations that require you to stay alert and ward off danger. On the other hand, you may also be tempted to use alcohol or drugs to reduce the level of tension you're feeling.

Behavior

Often the best response to extreme threat is to act aggressively to protect yourself. Many trauma survivors, especially those who went through trauma at a young age, never learn any other way of handling threat. They tend to become stuck in their ways of reacting when they feel threatened. They may be impulsive, acting before they think.

Aggressive behaviors also include complaining, "backstabbing," being late or doing a poor job on purpose, self-blame, or even self-injury. Many people with PTSD only use aggressive responses to threat. They are not able to use other responses that could be more positive.

Thoughts and beliefs

Everyone has thoughts or beliefs that help them understand and make sense of their surroundings. After trauma, a person with PTSD may think or believe that threat is all around, even when this is not true. He or she may not be fully aware of these thoughts and beliefs.

If you have PTSD, you may not be aware of how your thoughts and beliefs have been affected by trauma. For instance, since the trauma you may feel a greater need to control your surroundings. This may lead you to act inflexibly toward others. Your actions then provoke others into becoming hostile towards you. Their hostile behavior then feeds into and reinforces your beliefs about others." - U.S department of veteran affairs

Nesta's Hypersexuality as it relates to assault

"The survivor of trauma is left with unmetabolized rage which is directed both internally and externally. Simultaneously, the traumatized individual is actively attempting to escape the emotions and the loneliness of their constricted, damaged state. Their sexuality awakens early, without direction, and is often intensely driving them to seek out partners. It is this highly ambivalent state which characterizes sexual compulsivity. Their vandalized love maps (which were previously discussed) are trauma-bonded and therefore predispose them to seek out destructive partners. transactions and sexual interactions. Compulsive behavior is a means to numb-out when beginning to think and feel. This behavior also produces a high which allows the person to know she is still alive and human when feelings of depersonalization, numbness, emptiness and physical and emotional analgesia pervade. Compulsive sexual behavior becomes a solution - a means of feeling something in the dissociative fog, an experience of perceived control when feeling powerless, an illusory sense of safety connection and temporary escape from the aloneness." -U.S department of justice

Nesta's drinking

"Substance abuse and addiction is commonly connected to co-occurring disorders like PTSD, depression, and anxiety. Among people seeking treatment for PTSD are 14 times more likely to also be diagnosed with a substance abuse disorder (SUD). Attempting to self-medicate can be a cause to why many people with PTSD also abuse substance. The thought is that by abusing substances, a person with PTSD, will null or avoid PTSD symptoms. Those with PTSD with a SUD are more likely so abuse alcohol over drugs, such as cocaine. Research has found that service members and veterans that have heavy drinking tendencies are more likely to have PTSD, depression. War veterans with a PTSD diagnosis, who also drink alcohol, tend to be diagnosed with binge drinking...One of the highest risk groups for both PTSD and addiction is the veteran population. According to the U.S. Department of Veteran Affairs, veterans who seek out treatment for a SUD are often diagnosed with PTSD. This is most likely due to the emotional stress, physical demand, and mental strain of combat.10 Service members that were deployed overseas to Iraq and Afghanistan are at a higher risk of developing PTSD. In addition, PTSD has also been linked to veterans that have been sexually assaulted or harassed during their military service or experience.  Military service trauma can happen to any service member, of any gender, during their military service. Sexual trauma includes sexual assault, sexual abuse, or sexual harassment.About 1 in 5 female veterans have been diagnosed with military sexual trauma by Veteran Affairs (VA)." -American addiction centers

[queerautism]

Am I exploiting my dog?

Yesterday I asked @severelynerdysheep if I'm exploiting my dog by having him as an assistance dog in training (assistance dog is the legal UK term for service dog), and they linked me to this article.

It's an incredibly bad piece. Let's go through it.

"Firstly, it should be obvious to most observers that many service animals are being harmed. Police canine units and military animals are often intentionally cruelly treated as part of the training process"

'Service animal' is not a term interchangeable with 'working dog'. These are not service animals and irrelevant to the discussion. Though, for the record, police and military dogs just shouldn't be a thing and their training is garbage.

"The question of exploitation and harm is more nuanced when it comes to service animals used to assist those with disabilities, such as emotional support animals or guide dogs for the blind."

Really, those are the two examples you're going for? Emotional support animals are NOT service animals, and do not need to have any kind of special training that a pet wouldn't have, or perform any tasks outside of their presence being a comfort. Lumping them together does a huge disservice to disabled people, and it's an extremely common misconception by people who know very little about actual service work.

Only mentioning guide dogs for the blind also isn't great, because it's the only kind a lot of ableist people know about and recognise, which means a lot of handlers get told we don't really need our dogs, because we aren't blind. You had an opportunity to actually bring up the amazing diversity of service dogs here (autism dogs, psychiatric service dogs, Medical alert dogs, etc) and educate people, but instead reinforced misconceptions and stereotypes.

"These animals are not usually subjected to stressors which any ordinary companion animal wouldn’t be"

This is not exactly true. Service dogs deal with many situations and environments ordinary pets don't, of course. But you cannot define for a dog what they should perceive as a 'stressor', anymore than you can decide what a dog should or shouldn't find aversive. Many dogs find loud noises stressful and aversive. Mine, as a service dog in training, does not, and hasn't ever, since he comes from a line of working dogs bred to be very 'gunsteady', which means hunting dogs who wouldn't be scared of the loud sound of a gunshot.

If a service dog finds these things stressful, they'll wash out and not be one anymore.

"these animals are still being exploited for human gain, they are bred, raised and trained solely for human benefit."

And we come back to the central idea of exploitation. I just don't get it. It's like these people can't imagine building a mutualistic relationship with a dog, based on trust, where you work as a team. Where the dog also benefits.

What do they think our day to day looks like? What exactly is exploitative about it?

"As for whether or not these animals would be better off were they not service animals, this is something of a moot point, since these animals are bred specifically for the purpose of being service animals."

Actually mostly they are not! Program breeding, where the whole litter is bred for a specific organization and all puppies are expected to be service dog prospects, is quite rare and very much not how most disabled people get their prospects.

It's a lot more common for good breeders with breeds and lines suitable for service work to place some puppies from each litter as prospects, if they seem to have the temperament for it.

As an example, my dog's breeder does not breed exclusively service dogs at all. They are working line poodles, and in my dog's litter there was a lot of variety! - Another one of them also went to service work, I believe two went into dog sport homes, another one into a dog conformation home, and the rest went to pet homes, all depending on their individual traits and what they would be happiest as.

"Service animals are currently very rarely drawn from rescue populations, but this seems like an obvious way to solve a lot of the ethical issues involved with using service animals."

Fun fact, I tried talking to a few rescues, including breed specific rescues, for a few months after I decided I needed a service dog myself. It was my first option.

They all ended up turning me away, saying the same thing. Their dogs had their own difficulties to work through, and the chances of being successful with this training are extremely low. 99% of them simply aren't suitable.

Proper service dog training takes about 3 years. Here you're asking disabled people to adopt dogs with unknown genetics and spend incredible amounts of money and time for a huge chance of failure. It's cruel and dismissive.

Even in the cases where rescue dogs have successfully become service dogs (which of course still happens), they often have a very short working life, because they haven't been bred responsibly and with all the proper health clearances, which leaves them at risk of serious health issues and early death.

"There are groups mounting pressure to only train rescued animals, contrary to popular belief, many breeds of animals are capable of being guide dogs or emotional support animals, and since many dogs in shelters are still young there is little reason to resort to irresponsible breeding practices to fulfil the demand for service animals."

If you want rescue only service animals, you literally don't give a shit about disabled people. We are acceptable casualties to you. What we actually need from our partnership with our dogs is secondary to your ideology here.

Rescue dogs can be excellent emotional support animals, I'll agree there. Because as I said, they aren't service dogs and they don't need any especial training. They are still pets.

They most often cannot be service dogs. Even if they are young, temperament in dogs has a huge genetic component. Dogs that end up in rescues are not responsibly bred (a responsible good breeder will take any dog they produced back at any time, and stays as a secondary contact in the dog's microchip in case they do end up in a rescue somehow), and their unknown genetics not only can cause issues with their temperament and health that makes them unsuitable for work, but also often mean they are not a representative example of the breed and do not show the usual traits that make that breed successful at service work when bred reputably.

Adult temperament does not fully develop until a dog is +3 years old. This means you could do everything right with a young rescue dog, only for them to develop dog reactivity or aggression once they fully grow up.

It is simply not fair to ask every disabled person who needs a service dog to put years of their life into this process while stacking the cards against them like this.

Actual good responsible breeders absolutely exist. They do right by their dogs and work their asses off to bring healthy, sound dogs into this world. No one is talking about irresponsible breeders here.

All of their arguments recap into this:

"1) The animal was not specifically bred for purpose and is a rescued animal.

2) The animal must be treated as a companion rather than a worker, and as such must be properly retired with a loving family once they can no longer work.

3) Animals should not be placed under any stress or put in danger.

4) There should be no viable alternative for the use of service animals."

1) Again, they usually aren't specifically bred, certain lines have a few puppies from each litter that have service work as the best fit for them.

2) Of course they are companions. We're a team. Of course they deserve a happy loving retirement.

3) You cannot avoid all stressors, that's life. Low levels of stress to be overcome actually help dogs build their confidence. Obviously none of us want our dogs in any danger.

4) if you think the stipulations you've presented for service dogs are sufficient to fullfil disable people's needs, I'd love to know what you consider to be a 'viable alternative', because something tells me it ain't gonna be good either.

"An example of this might be a therapy dog who has come from a rescue center as a young dog, and would probably otherwise have been killed."

Most places do not have an overpopulation problem so big they're killing young dogs at rescues. The UK sure doesn't. Young dogs get adopted extremely fast.

Also, a therapy dog is NOT a service dog. You cannot keep using these terms interchangeably and expect me to take your opinion on service dogs seriously.

A therapy dog is simply a pet as well, with a general calm and friendly temperament, that volunteers with their owner to meet and cheer up people. It's a completely different thing with different standards. Many rescue dogs can indeed be excellent therapy dogs!

"We do not have to deny that animal use is exploitation in order to justify service animals in some scenarios. Yes, service animals are being taken advantage of"

Still would love to hear how exactly I'm taking advantage of my dog, or what the alternative 'living with a dog without taking advantage of them' looks like.

"We are seeing some advancements in robotics which look promising as a replacement for service animals, so this may become a non-issue in the not too distance future."

Imagine complaining we're the ones not treating service dogs as living individuals but thinking they can be fully replaced by robots. Amazing.

"Regardless of your viewpoint on this, no negative judgement should ever be placed upon the people who require the use of service animals in order to function, it is not their fault that this is the option that has been given to them, and no one who relies on a service animal should be made to feel bad because of it."

You can say this as much as you want, but it's absurd. You're 100% being extremely ableist and asking disabled people to do things in the most costly, effort and time consuming way to fit in with a morality position which is clearly been developed with no real accurate knowledge of service dog work or training.

Plenty of us have chosen this option with full understanding of what it means, it hasn't been 'given to us'. Don't go 'oh the poor disableds don't know any better tho' like it absolves you of all the shitty things you've just said about us and our dogs.

Anyway I said my piece. Have a cute pic of my dog Kovacs, assistance dog in training for my Autism and CPTSD, currently almost two years old and living his best puppy life. I had to stop writing this for a little while many times because he demanded pets.

[gravitasfalls]

A rant on fandom etiquette, the GF fandom, and what they did 4 years ago (and now)

By now, my “bullshit” tag has refuted most of the ridiculous hot takes, fun policing, and harassment that fans of Stanford Pines have had to face from the wider Gravity Falls fandom. But these rebuttals fall short of naming the real problem with anti-Ford wank: we never should have seen it in the first place.

People might have genuinely forgotten this, but fandom used to have etiquette against character hate. We called it “wank” and “bashing” instead of dignifying it as “discourse”. As late as 2014, fandoms on this very site had “X hate” or “anti-X” tagging systems for blacklisting, as courtesy to people who liked X thing...

...a far cry from GF fans of 2015 demonizing Ford in the most inexplicable ways, making every post a platform for that, siccing their followers on anyone fully positive about him, then pretending that never happened post-finale as they continue the bashing more insidiously to this day.

Like, what even was that? There’s a lot to unpack in those people’s arguments but let’s just throw out the whole suitcase.

(Under the cut: Snapshots of discourse I shouldn’t have had to put up with over the years, and snark-based coping with that. It gets ugly, you’ve been warned.)

Ford is irredeemable/deserves to suffer, why he didn’t even thank Stan!!1

Thanks I hate it! “It” being your apparent decision that, because you can’t make the fictional character suffer, real people who like him are the next best thing.

Ford is egotistical! Have I mentioned on literally every post I think his only trait is “egotistical”?

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. But while that is just, like, your opinion man, you’re entitled to it on your own posts; you’re falsely entitled about it by forcing it on dissenters’ posts and inboxes.

*dumps negativity into inboxes anyway*

Your Hot Takes have disturbed and insulted me. You fools are unworthy of my great knowledge. The era of human enlightenment shall never come to pass.

You really think Ford is some kind of hero?

Only after you told me I wasn’t Allowed to see him as one and I Examined My Desires™ like you demanded! Funny how critical thinking ≠ agreeing with you.

Ford is your favorite? WHY DO YOU HATE MABEL.

Better question, why are you copying “WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA” logic? 9/11 did fan drama I swear

Ford is NOT PURE OF HEEEAAART, so you have to Constantly Explicitly Acknowledge his Sins and interrogate what relating to him says about you.

I got no friends ‘cause they read the papers. It’s funny, actually, projecting onto him got me dangerously close to processing some negative experiences from my past... good thing I have you here to shut those thoughts down <3 Thanks for saving me from myself uwu

If you just want to project onto a comfort character in peace, Stan is right there! His lack of fantasy elements makes him more relatable anyway!

Ford brought Bill’s manipulation on himself!

Damn fandom, back at it again with the GROSS VICTIM BLAMING

FFS why is this take as prominent now as ever??? at least the outlandish criticisms were funny, this one just makes me want to be dead.

Ford is abusive/manipulative because he doesn’t make fun of Dipper/ made a case for his apprenticeship/ called Mabel good/ complimented her personality!

(Yes, people did these mental gymnastics; yes, my soul left my body instantly.)

STOP trying to justify Ford’s actio-ma’am this is an Arby’s. also:

Ford is the Epitome of Toxic Masculinity, if you defend him either he’s your Male Power Fantasy or you’re a ditzy fangirl broad with ovaries for brains!

Ah yes, the two genders. Pack it in, everyone, we’ve reached peak feminism and patriarchy is over.

Someone negativity-tagged my Ford post, WTF?! I’m not “anti-Ford”, I’m “pro Ford-learning-a-lesson”!

And pro his-fans-never-having-a-moment-of-peace, apparently! Sorry I assumed you were a hater by your complete lack of positive things to say about him tho

Ford is a sociopath/deserves death for having no empathy!

"Tumblr is as ableist as any majority-conservative site," I say into the mic. The crowd boos. I begin to walk off in shame, when a voice speaks and commands silence from the room. "You’re right," they say. I look for the owner of the voice. There in the 3rd row stands: tumblr.

*Dozens of 10000+ note posts calling Ford stupid, manipulative, solely at fault for everything that went wrong, other inanities*

(This is the fandom that made me get Xkit. I’m sure hundreds of my 1000+ blocked posts are theirs.)

If you like Ford on any terms but ours then I’m sorry, but Gravity Falls just isn’t for you, k?

I don’t have a flippant response to this one. Just... stop. No one has to agree with you about this character; no, nor with me. No one even has to engage with fandom moralistically; I promise it wouldn’t hurt anyone if I were to watch this show without having to Interrogate its Morality. It wouldn’t even hurt if people voiced character hate within reasonable bounds of tagging, as I’ve said. But instead they spread it like the plague in the name of Purity and insinuated (using ages-old “ur a fake fan!!1″ no less) that we don’t get to have outlets. I’m tired.

Look at my hilarious/satisfying art of Ford saying OOC strawman things, Stan beating him up, the kids turning their backs on him! (Srsly look at it I’ve put it in all the tags)

You’re madness, Gravity Falls fandom. Virulent madness. And everything you touch dies with you.

This is only a fraction of shit we’ve had to wade through, practically every day while the show was running. You couldn’t avoid it if you followed popular blogs. I saw the best meta writers of my fandom dogpiled by BNFs, dragging themselves through the blue hellsite at dawn looking for a fix-it fix. And people now expect me to believe it was “just Discourse” or that anything equivalent happened “in reverse” toward Stan. If I didn’t know better that they don’t know better, I’d call gaslighting.

I don’t expect to change anything. In fact, until this blog’s next go-around I don’t intend on seeking out new content anymore. I can’t keep looking at a fandom where the consensus on a canonically abused character’s victimization is that it was stupid, funny, a moral failing, or deserved, and expect anything to improve.

But to anyone else these people hurt: your anger or upset is valid, and I’m sorry. None of us deserved this. And I’m not letting it follow me into the next decade and make me forget why I liked this show in the first place, even if the only way to do that right now is cut off from the fandom a bit. I’m telling you, it never should have come to that. I don’t know if negativity-tagging can ever catch on here, considering tumblr has no boundaries by design and fandom no boundaries by choice... but for the sake of everyone who comes next, Gravity Falls fandom, make an effort.

[ca1e70-deactivated]

a list of my entirely way too niche headcanons ive actually implemented for everyones imagination:

name options ive used and refuse to retire: david elizabeth strider (sometimes i dont feel like being a douche to others and saying thats not his name), harley davidson strider, and david james strider for the sake of simplicity

im not gonna tell yall the like. oc exes ive given him bc thatll take eighteen years. 

i dont rlly have an explanation on the ghost thing besides the fact he just can? ive occasionally pulled from family ghost stories and experiences bc i somehow got landed with family members who lived in a haunted house for a decade and enjoy scaring me with all the stories (including the time my cousin literally died on the kitchen floor from a bronchial spasm and one of the friends that was over asked my aunt later what was up with the old man she saw in the corner of the room that night - my cousin is fine btw shes just a huge bitch and a third grade teacher and i dont like her)

whether or not hes done drugs is based on absolutely nothing besides how im feeling in that moment. either hes the designated driver and sober friend forever or he got fired from his job after doing a line at work during graveyard with some random customers theres no inbetween (this absolutely happened @ waho. if dave works at waho hes a mess of a person and thats on the diner itself.)

ok look i hc dave w/schizophrenia besides when i was 14 i had a hyperfixation with learning about it and then at 16 was prescribed a medication and had side effects so wack my therapist genuinely thought 14 yr old me was onto something and its a weird way to cope with the idea that lady put in my head that i might “develop it in my twenties” which i turn 20 this year and i havent been able to stop obsessing and panicking over the prospect so PLEASE dont come in my inbox calling me ableist im not out here all harley quinn in suicide squad with the voices ok hes medicated, he goes to therapy, the hard fast delusion that lil cal was nearly sentient and informed bro of every single thing dave did no matter how asinine it was is no longer a debilitatingly affecting him ANYWAYS

i actually use the chicken/egg farming family pretty often just because its hilarious to me to give dave like. an actual mom and dad. hes literally an uncle to like three different kids he just never visits because they make fun of his skinny jeans and he hates one of his (incredibly bare-bones ocs all of them) brothers who threatened to bash his head in with a little league bat after dave broke his star wars lego set apart on accident (but not rlly) so their parents were like “why dont you stay with your brother in the big city for a lil while champ” and then they just never picked him back up? and thats on favoritism 

the other one is that his name is actually david reed and hes the middle child of a family of three who literally live the standard golden retriever white middle class life only they went to disney land or something equally as dumb one year when dave was like 6 and he wandered off so bro literally just went “huh free game” because frankly he was an idiot who thought maybe i should take this kid home because its real dangerous in parking lots and then it was too late to NOT have it seem like a kidnapping and thats why daves never had a summer job, seen his birth certificate, or gone to school. but vaguely remembers what kindergarten was like and having a pet dog and calling someone mom as a kid. 

im not making a bullet point about his sex life headcanons just use your imagination and acknowledge the fact bro essentially worked within the sex industry and i enjoy putting dave through trauma as a catharsis 

i stopped doing this one usually but if he did go to school hes been in percussion since fifth grade and played the drums in his high schools jazz band as well as various edgy teenager garage bands he likes to pretend dont have a youtube presence and that hes absolutely never been shirtless in front of plenty of his classmates because he wore a hoodie to a show like an idiot. idk occasionally ill put him in an actual band he doesnt hate but keeps separate from his lil turntechGodhead internet persona (which i will ALSO touch upon in a sec) until they wind up getting looped into a tour with some bigger named band that has a show in *insert beta kid here*’s city and hes gotta come clean solely so he can visit his online friend. sorry derseasterous thats the one time weve ever run into each other and i made him have a crush on one of his bandmates i was in my anti-daverose phase where i made dave a hoe and also didnt want to admit i still loved the ship all these years later 

i hate it so much but you know the whole vr loli trap voice shit that was popular a while ago? hes fucking baller at it for some reason. he did it as a joke while talking to bro and they both about shat their pants. if im feeling real ambitious, hes got a separate soundcloud solely dedicated to doing dumbass rap covers or making his own but in the voice under the pseudonym elizabeth “beth” davids that he will never admit is his. well, he will, but hes gonna be really fucking embarrassed about it. irony or not.

talking abt seperate soundclouds and stuff ive always had it where turntechGodhead was his like. essentially internet fucking persona facade shit he used because we all had that phase where we wanted memorable urls and stuff but also didnt want to totally ignore the nagging fear of people finding you in real life, until it turned into real life ppl finding you on the internet. so he also has basically an adjacent set of social media under the same name but its just a boring username i havent decided on so everyone he knows irl doesnt mix up with what hes made for himself as TG and the people he knows as TG dont know what highschool he goes to. (this occasionally comes with the territory of ppl on parp being pissed that daves “lying” or “hiding things” from his friends as if he was doing it out of spite instead of just keeping embarrassing tagged photos and videos from football games or when he ate shit at the skatepark from fucking with his “rap career”)

every once in a while i get on a kick where hes just german. like, i just replace houston texas with hamburg germany and have him apply to a university in whatever state is applicable for whoever im chatting with and it goes from there? sometimes he moved when he was little and went through the whole visa thing, sometimes he didnt go through the visa thing, sometimes hes a dual citizen because of family and shit, its all dependent on what suits the situation best. 

one that ive been fucking with for a while but hardly break out (until recently with like 5 roses in the span of one day hell yeah) is that he has a neighbor at the end of the hall who is like a thousand year old witch lady that hes basically adopted as his mother figure in lieu of not having one and shes totally cool with it, especially bc when she kicks the bucket she fully plans on giving dave all her occult stuff so her figure-skating coach and realtor daughter doesnt sell it at a garage sale and lets it all go to waste. she also once brought rose up by name in a conversation without any prompting of her existence which dave didnt realize for days, and then one time cryptically stopped and stared at an empty space in the wall, went “she has potential, you know.” then looked at him sitting on her kitchen counter with a smile “lots of it” and hes thought about that weekly ever since. (it is important to note one of the occult items he leaves her is literally her own personal book of shadows shes been filling out for decades its like a 600 page leatherbound book dave has no idea what its used for but the sheer amount of homemade spells and etc in it is like. gonna murder rose the second this chick gets her hands on it i promise you.)

theres the standard strife shit? im not rlly gonna get into those theyre all basically cookie cutter bullshit. its just standard bro and dave abuse talk. i like to inclulde the whole 24hr live cam up in the apartment that definitely watches dave in every room besides his own and the bathroom, but that quickly delves into the prospect of middle-aged men stalking him online and basically sexually harassing him in his own god damn home by talking about how they can see him just trying to take his shoes off in the living room after getting home and frankly? its not one of my best takes! but once you throw it into the headcanon bin, its there forever. 

he actually really does do something with his photography but not enough to warrant anything exciting, but he has his own branding for it and regularly takes pictures of his friends or anything else he thinks is moderately interesting enough to take pictures of, but those are just thrown into shoeboxes under his bed in favor of posting genuine shots because he wants to keep his image intact and blurry photos of jade smiling in the tree they climbed up together while bec paws at the base of it while whining isnt exactly something he wants the whole world to see.

i also pretty often but him into either paleontology OR i put him down as trying to become a mortician because he thinks handing roadkill once he graduated from museum giftshop specimens to doing his own taxidermy on the side has prepared him enough to perform an occasional autopsy and start embalming real human corpses. (sometimes i put my own desires in and make them his bc i have to project at some point and put him through the same EMT course i dropped out of bc it was one semester and he already has pretty decent first aid skills, but he definitely didnt expect it to be as fucking wild at times as it is, but whats he gonna do? get a job back at waffle house? the company hes working for just offered to pay like half his associates in paramedicine tuition and hes already got all his pre-recs done when he started for paleo. at least its a stable job and hes got the ability to be compassionate in the moment) 

im running out of things that ive done to the poor kid. OH 

hes not a virgin he had a girlfriend all four years of high school (shes also one of his optional and designated exes plz keep up) and their relationship ends in one of two ways: she dies in a car accident a week before their high school graduation, or she stops talking to him entirely a week after their high school graduation until a couple years later she gets into (guess what) a car accident with her current wife/girlfriend and dies which leaves behind their daughter. who just so happens to also be daves daughter. her name is hannah and i love her like my own but no one ever likes her and thats on the conditioning of dirk. does dave end up taking her in? yes. shes awesome and the first time he takes her to the park to like run off some fucking steam she disappears for two minutes and dave is moderately terrified until she comes back holding a dead baby squirrel and thats the moment he realizes huh maybe things really do be genetic.

ok at the bottom of the list im gonna add the couple of times hes been a camboy which usually coincides with the live apartment cam thing and the amount of people in his dms calling him hot or whatever, but typically its more of a started the day he turned 18 and basically dipped around 20 in favor of showing up randomly with no warning to complain about a video game dick in hand because it gives him an outlet that wont annoy his friends bc this is the fifteenth time hes had a lot to say this week about a certain boss battle and also the comments fuel his ego and daddy issues.

the last one wasnt the bottom but literally unless its explicitly proven otherwise every time anyone rps with me there is the underlying fact dave strider was a goalie on his high school lacrosse teams all four years and (shocker another one) definitely had the hots for one of his teammates like major hots like first gay experience hots. like it was painfully obvious that teammate also liked him back hots. like one night at a team sleepover one of the other guys was like can yall just makeout and get it over with were fucking tired and dave really had the balls to be offended and ask what the fuck they were talking about while literally sitting halfway in the mans lap bc for some reason they had to share the same chair. 

he is also guilty until proven innocent of being the worlds biggest loner outside of that sports team and even though hes literally a jock he still opts to eat his lunch alone in the hallway or something like that and has a tendency to leave girls on read, but bc hes got an in with the rest of the jocks hes basically drug around to plenty of parties and since hes conventionally attractive enough and popular in the aloof way that he is, hes got plenty of tagged insta posts and twitter directs and snapchat streaks going. 

THESE WERE ALL NO GAME AND DONT INVOLVE SHIPS BC I LIKE TO KEEP MY OPTIONS OPEN AND THEYRE LITERALLY ALL BASED OFF RPS IVE DONE I HOPE YALL JUDGE ME ACCORDINGLY

[sol1056]

when the lamp stays unlit

a multi-part anon that’s been waiting awhile:

...I never really fully thought of shiro as physically disabled... he had a fully functional prosthetic arm with all the motor skills of a real arm plus superhuman strength and so forth AND because it didn’t really impair him. It would be one thing if he was physically disabled and the show thus normalized disability; but to me, Shiro‘s arm (and Ezor‘s fake leg and Zethrid‘s missing eye) were more like sci-fi ‘cool battle scars’ rather than things that really impacted their social or emotional life. [...] The missing arm made [Shiro] more incapacitated during s7 (I guess?) but it was an excuse for benching him, which is something I found ableist. And while he has a mental illness as well, I thought it only ever became an issue when it was convenient to the plot. Hope that made sense, it wasn’t my intention to be insensitive since many people see him as great disability rep.

This is nearly as difficult a subject as race, but it’s also an important discussion to have. We do need the conversation about LGBT+ representation in VLD, but it’s drowning out an equally important conversation about how disability is represented (and treated) in popular media.  

As a caveat, I’m a work in progress when it comes to un-learning the ableism that permeates Western culture, even when directly harmed by its perpetuation. So I’m inviting anyone with the spoons and lived experience to join in. The more voices and perspectives, the better. 

Behind the cut: clarifying a few terms, how the SFF genre conceptualizes disability, how humans conceptualize difference, narrative treatment of Shiro as disabled, and PTSD/mental health in popular media. 

First, let’s define some terms so we’re on the same page. Assistive technology “increases or maintains the capabilities of people with disabilities.” Adaptive technology (a subset of assistive) is tech “specifically designed for persons with disabilities and would seldom be used by non-disabled persons.” Gadgets like sock cradles are assistive, since an abled person might use them; a prosthesis or screen reader would be adaptive. The majority of media representations of disability will use adaptive technologies to signal a disability, rather than assistive. (definition from wikipedia)

Now for a few lesser-known terms. There’s a philosophical concept concerning the breakage of things we’ve always taken for granted. Like flipping a light switch: the light goes on. We don’t pause to marvel over what made the lightbulb glow. Then one day, you flip the switch and the light doesn’t come on. Now suddenly you have to stop and notice something that previously you’d never given much attention.   

This sudden awareness of wrongness --- the light not going on --- takes three forms. It can be conspicuous, where it’s visibly damaged, ie the lamp is smashed. It can be obtrusive: a part is missing, ie there’s no bulb in the socket. Or it can be obstinate, ie the bulb and lamp are fine, we just don’t have power. 

The abled perspective --- when suddenly reminded of disability --- is to see the disability as conspicuous and obtrusive. That is, broken and incomplete. Which means, that’s the only story the abled perspective knows, so that’s the story it tells, over and over. 

It’s a common assumption, especially in the SFF genre: adaptive technology removes a character from the category of disabled. Cybernetic modifications or prostheses become design elements; the character is considered --- and written --- as abled. In a sense, the character is like the lamp when there’s power: the author can ignore the label of ‘disability’ and carry on without giving more thought to the issue.

But if there’s removal (or breakage), for the author, it’s like flipping a switch and the light doesn’t go on. You can almost hear the author thinking: ‘oh, forgot this character can’t do anything.’ Until the story provides repairs or replacement, the previously adaptively-abled character is now un-abled. 

Disability --- in the absence of adaptive technology --- is, at best, obstinate. The character is neither broken nor incomplete; they’re a lamp without a power source. Nothing else has changed. But if someone never gave thought to how lamps need power to operate, their first reaction won’t be to ask if the power’s out. It’ll be to check the lamp, the bulb, the wiring, and declare it mysteriously broken because no light is happening. 

Abled writers effectively shift the blame onto the lamp: it’s now useless, by some ill-defined sense. But it’s not; it hasn’t changed. It was reliant on power when power was available, and it’s reliant when power’s not available, too. 

The analogy itself is already too simple for the reality; it implies a person could be abled/disabled as on/off. So let’s adjust, and say: the lamp has a solar-power backup and still lights up --- just not as quickly or brightly. Or it’s a drill whose battery needs recharging: it’s still usable as a manual screwdriver, awkward but workable. Plus, the base is still handy as a makeshift hammer. 

The presence of any given disability does not automatically mean the person is fully dis-abled by all other measures as well. Analogies only go so far, after all. 

But this is the main point: the character never stopped being disabled, any more than the lamp stopped needing power. By that same token, the person who takes medication for ADD isn’t ‘cured’ with medication, anymore than a paraplegic stops being unable to walk just because they have a wheelchair. 

Now that I think about it, this could extend to just about any representation one doesn’t experience personally. I mean, we do it to each other: “behind the grill, she’s one of the guys.” And then we see the person after work in a dress and heels and we’re reminded she was a woman all along; we were just setting aside her gender because we could ignore it. Like the light switch we flip unthinkingly, we paid that detail no mind.

And the fact is: it doesn’t matter if an onlooker judges a trait as irrelevant. The person still has that gender, religion, ability, sexuality, ethnicity, age, etc. When we aim to be colorblind, or genderblind, or sexualityblind... it’s like having a lamp that won’t go on and not realizing electricity is required. We’re blind to half the picture, so we blame the lamp, not the absence of power. 

We’re forgetting that because we can ignore her gender doesn’t mean she can. Or even would. But so long as we can, we’ll miss all the ways her reality informs her experiences.   

You’re right that benching Shiro in S7 was an ableist move. The entire season makes evident how little thought the staff has afforded Shiro. To them, he was abled, now he is not, and this radically changes everything: no longer a paladin, not even a pilot, nor even on the front lines (and when he is, he loses). As @caramelcheese​ pointed out, Shiro’s fought with both hands tied behind his back. Lacking one arm shouldn’t slow him down in the least. 

Others have written at length about Shiro’s new prosthesis. They’ve raised practical issues with a floating arm, such as imbalance and center-of-gravity, and ethical issues such as the offensiveness of a design that echoes his tormentor’s signature detail, so I won’t belabor those here. To me, there are two aspects even more insidious. 

One is caused by narrative silence on Shiro’s changed status. Shiro’s only visible difference is the loss of his prothesis; the narrative fails to address this, let alone provide any other explanation. Narrative silence becomes tacit confirmation: an amputee cannot be a hero. 

The second is the dehumanization. Before S7, in casual dress, Shiro’s arm was evident; in armor, he was no more marked than anyone else. His expulsion from being a paladin is visually reinforced by his loss of the Black Paladin’s armor; the Garrison uniform and space suit are modified to be constant reminders that Shiro is disabled. There is empty air where his upper arm would be. 

His redesign marks him as literally incomplete. 

As for mental health, we can’t discuss Shiro’s PTSD in a vacuum, when it’s a part of so many kids’ lives. Some suffer PTSD themselves from first-hand trauma, and likely many more suffer it along with their parents as a result of the US’ anti-immigrant attitudes. The hardest hit may be military kids between 8 and 18, of whom roughly one in five has a parent who suffers from PTSD. 

Shiro had to have been a powerful figure for those kids. He had onscreen panic attacks and flashbacks, yet remained a hero in the story and to his team.  His PTSD-inflected moments may have served the plot, but those also worked to keep present the continuing damage from his trauma. More importantly for younger viewers, he laid a hero’s narrative over the sometimes terrifying reality of a family member who suffers from PTSD or related trauma.

S3 left that behind, turning Shiro’s trauma into headaches, and even that much mentioned rarely. By S7, no signs of PTSD remained. The EPs’ tone-deaf explanation --- that Shiro learned to grit his teeth and just deal with his trauma --- was a horrific betrayal of the audience who related to Shiro. Willpower has never been a viable cure for mental illnesses or trauma.

One ingredient for healing from PTSD is support and love from a strong network of family and friends, and it’s ironic the series’ only example of a healing moment was the DnD episode. It allowed Shiro/Kuron to create and role-play a new story for himself, in a safe environment, surrounded by the support of people who mattered most to him. When Shiro/Kuron tells Coran that he feels better after playing, it’s one of the rare grace notes in the story: because that would be a healing experience for someone with PTSD.

Shiro’s story undergoes an odd reversal. He begins the story treated as though he’s abled, yet mentally traumatized. By S7, the story considers him disabled yet also fully ‘over’ his PTSD. He went from conspicuous and obtrusive for his PTSD, to conspicuous and obtrusive for being an amputee.

After thinking about it, I wonder if perhaps it’s because once the lamp has been broken for long enough --- regardless of the reason --- it eventually becomes yet another thing we don’t think about. Just like once, perhaps as children, we found light switches fascinating and the lamp going on/off to be worthy of deep thought, eventually we learned to pay it no mind. 

Perhaps Shiro’s reversal is yet another indication of an abled creator who doesn’t understand the obstinate nature of disability. We have some backwards notions about illness, in the US, and one of them is that illness is a moral failure. Like, if you just tried hard enough, you’d be better. Any disability for which there’s no cure --- you can’t regrow an arm, after all --- thus renders the person both permanently broken and morally inadequate.

And, apparently, not worthy of being a paladin. 

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Mod Note Re: Disability

Greetings fellow Fandalites!  Bug and I wanted to address something we’ve noticed in a couple asks.

We’re both interested in disability studies. Or, rather, after being exposed to scholarship, activism, and art about the portrayal of disability in popular culture, we’ve both come to realize a few things.  A. Ableism is far too prevalent in society, B. Any scholarship that includes identity politics (race studies, queer studies, post-Colonialism, etc) NEEDS to consider the disabled identity, c. We need to amplify disabled voices, especially artists, and d. Media portrayals of disabled characters are often deeply problematic.

Bug and I are not experts in disability studies, but we are both working hard to educate ourselves and apply disability studies to our chosen fields.

A quick definition for those of you unfamiliar: ableism is “discrimination in favor of able-bodied people...it’s also the belief that people with disabilities need to be fixed or cannot function as full members of society, and that having a disability is a defect rather than a dimension of difference” (X). It’s casting disability as something wrong with the body of the disabled individual, rather than something wrong with the society that fails to accommodate disabled bodies and minds. It’s assuming people with disabilities have little or no autonomy—basically what Jake (and to a lesser extent Marco and Cassie) do in #50 when they meet James, Kelly, Colette, and the others. Allie Cannington says that society tends to have “a very narrow-minded perception of disability. That narrow-minded assumption that all individuals with disabilities need and want certain things.”

This isn’t meant to point fingers or blame anyone. We didn’t know this a few years ago. We really doubt anyone on here is being deliberately ableist. But there are a few things that skirt uncomfortably close to ableism, so we won’t answer asks dealing with:

The assumption that people with disabilities would want to become nothlits in abled bodies. (Aside from lumping everyone together, this implies the superiority of abled over disabled bodies.  Also, the U.S.’s abysmal history of mistreating and dismissing the disabled makes it questionable whether this technology would be offered, whether or not anyone wanted it.)

The assumption that anyone with a disability would want to use alien or human technology to change themselves, including when it comes to mental illness and neurodiversity.

The assumption that Yeerks in their natural form are disabled. If humans figured out a way to fly, or teleport, or make things appear out of midair, it wouldn’t mean that the humans who couldn’t do those things were disabled. All the things I listed are super cool, and if I gained one of those abilities I would be VERY reluctant to give it up. But unless it was something that evolved organically (which takings hosts didn’t,) and/or anyone without this ability would die, (which isn’t true for the Yeerks,) the lack of having a host/a superpower/whatever does NOT automatically make someone disabled.

The assumption that an entire group of people (vecols, the visually impaired, the elderly, Minnesotans, the YPM, Hork Bajir, water polo enthusiasts, etc etc etc) would want the same or similar modifications to their minds or bodies.

Any strong assumptions about a disability that neither we nor anyone we’re close to has experienced. As Bug mentioned in her deaf Marco AU, we have an uncle who is hard of hearing. Simply knowing him isn’t enough—it’s the stories he’s shared about everyday ableism, about the frustrations of being hard of hearing in a hearing world, and about Deaf culture—that informed Bug’s AU.  We’re not close with anyone with, for instance, paralysis or amputation; our ability to speak meaningfully about the life experiences of those individuals is severely limited.

If you have a disability and you’d like to consider what it would mean if Rachel were blind, or if Timmy was angrier at the Animorphs for getting his best friend killed, go for it. Tag us and we’ll happily share it. Also feel free to message us if we ever say or share anything that you find ableist. We’re still learning.

As Bug has said before, there’s simply no way that every ask will be answered. Just because you didn’t receive an answer doesn’t mean you did something wrong. Bug (and rarely, me,) answers asks that spark an idea, a scene, etc. There are some really interesting asks that won’t get answered. We’re Ph.D students: free time is a rare commodity.

— Cates

A couple of Bug’s asides on discussions of disability are below the cut.

To quote Cates: “Some people choose to modify their bodies/minds, some of them because of disabilities.  Some do not choose to do so; some do not have that choice.  However, ‘Julie didn’t want to be deaf anymore’ isn’t a story. ‘Julie decided to get a cochlear implant after considering the opinions of friends who had and hadn’t chosen to get the implant. She was nervous that she was just doing it to please her husband, who wasn’t deaf, but she decided that getting the implant would help her in her career as a speech therapist, and, hey, it was something she really wanted, so she went for it.’ That’s a story.”

Some other Animorphs-specific ideas that are doubtless well-intentioned but do not necessarily reflect the experiences of individuals with disabilities:

Yeerks as assistants for individuals with communication-related disabilities.  This practice could be useful for individuals who understand the process of yeerk infestation and give their fully informed consent.  However, it would involve giving a total stranger access to the disabled individual’s email passwords, personal fantasies, secret fears, weird crushes, and literally every single other piece of private information in that person’s life.  The implications become extremely troubling extremely quickly if the would-be host didn’t choose to seek out a yeerk assistant of their own accord.

Vecols finding a haven on Earth.  Although Mertil specifically chooses to live on Earth to avoid andalite ableism, no Earth society is absent of ableism.  The attitude that individuals with disabilities should “hide away” because it’s “for their own good” exists among humans as well as andalites.  The possibilities of humans and andalites having different attitudes toward disability are endless, but unfortunately Earth is definitely not a utopia for vecols.

Yeerks as having a “right” to use others’ bodies by force because of qualities of yeerk bodies.  At least in the U.N., there aren’t policies about anyone having the “right” to enslave anyone else, regardless of any of the individuals’ embodied experiences.

James and the other Auximorphs preferring abled bodies by default.  Some of them might prefer abled bodies, some might not.  We don’t know, and we don’t have enough information to make any assumptions.

Anyway, I’m echoing what Cates said: nobody is making these assumptions on purpose, and nobody has any malice here.  I’m still learning about disability studies, and a few years ago I wouldn’t have realized that many of these discussions are dominated by abled voices.  I’m trying to become more educated and responsible about my own abled privileges, and I seriously appreciate anyone who is willing to let us know how we can be more responsible and inclusive in the future.  Thank you.

— Bug

[the-babbering-dabber]

I've been reading some of the comments on this post and I wanted to address some of them.

Chris Pratt is a human. Humans are ignorant. Humans make mistakes. Humans are never 100% perfect and good. So what if he doesnt openly endorse a presidential candidate? Voting is supposed to be a private, personal decision. It's his decision to keep it private.

I, in no way, support Trump. I'm mostly democratic. But guess what, I'm also Christain. Just because you're Christain, doesnt mean that you are Republican or support Trump. I also think that yall have no idea how hard it is to find a church that agrees with what you believe and think. I still havent found a Church like that (and boy have I been looking). Saying that Pratt is anti lgbtqia+ because the majority of his church is, is like saying that I am anti lgbtqia+, sexist, racist, islamophobic, ableist, pro life, etc. Because, where I went to school and church (private, catholic school), it was like that. I'm a feminist, I'm a BLM ally, I'm disabled, I'm pro choice, I'm Bi as hell (and fully support the rest of the lgbtqia+ community), i dont discriminate based on skin color or religion, I fully support human rights and equality. But the church I attended did not. I couldn't find a Church that that supported what I believed and who I was. For years, I couldn't even mention feminism or BLM or the lgbtqia+ community, much less support all these things - because of my surroundings.

And dont take this as a "pity the catholics and Christians", because you shouldn't. But you also shouldnt persecute. One of my favorite quotes goes along the lines of "Be careful not get caught up in defending and standing for something that you become what you speak against." I think that's important. Christianity, to me, isn't about the church's dogmas or rules. It's about holding to our faith (so God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit and all that jazz) and loving others. I dont even look at the rules and the bs that is "thou shalt burn in hell if u lgbtqia+, thou shalt be a slave to men if u a woman, all lives matter". Fuck that shit, it isnt even in the Bible, so fuck it.

I'm getting off topic, kinda, but the thing is, you cannot condemn someone and assume what they believe based off of what they don't do/say or where they attend church. You dont know what people believe or think or are. This is the same for RDJ. We have no idea he may have said or done privately to support Brie and is co star that played his daughter (sorry I cant recall her name).

One of the comments I read said that the tweet didnt condemn him for being Christain. But it does. The tweet says "organization". A religion is not an organization. Not all of the beliefs in religions match up with the followers' beliefs. Mine do not 100% match up with Christianity/Catholicism. We do not know what Pratt believes. Pratt is doing his job. He's an actor. He's in the entertainment business. He does not need to let the world know everything he believes and thinks and does. Now, do I wish that he openly supported the lgbtaiq+ community? Yes. But he doesnt have to. And he doesnt need to be cancelled for keeping his thoughts private.

These people are just people. They aren't gods or superhuman or perfect. They are people. People make mistakes. People are arrogant. People are human.

cancel chris pratt and continue to stan ellen page

[heiavikings]

i'm not particularly involved in the f1 fandom on tumblr because i dislike most of the drivers nowadays lol, but i think the issue with the attitude you mentioned in your post is the fictional part. yeah, it's ridiculous to condemn people for liking a fictional murderer/supervillian/whatever, but the point is that they are not real. max verstappen, on the other hand, is a real human being who has done real things, and so you cannot apply the same logic. i've not seen anyone accusing him of murder - more of things like speaking insensitively, or in a racist and ableist manner, as well as controversy about his driving style and the way the championship was settled. those are valid conversations to have, and absolutely not the same as "you're cancelled because you 'stan loki'" or whatever shit marvel fans get up to nowadays.

yeah anon, like you said, max is a real person, and of couse I'm not saying you can't criticize him. like, that's not what my post was about... I'm ok with people having discussions about his driving style and not liking it and the things you mentioned, and I absolutely agree the way the championship was settled was a big mess and shouldn't happen like that and people have every right to be pissed about this (it was not max fault tho! we all need to remember it's fia that we should get angry about).

but apparently some hardcore antis really went overboard and started some bullshit about war crimes and stuff. (like I said, I'm not really fully involved with this fandom either, just follow a few trusted blogs so I stay away from the drama and just hear about it happening somewhere in a safe distance from me). and it's absolutely fine to not like max or the way he drives, but saying things like this????? hello?