#then we sat in front of the church and talked a bit. it was quite nice [:

[outlying-hyppocrate]

MY SCHOOL SCHEDULE ABSOLUTELY FUCKS????????

[melminli]

Ddakji Man

summery - you were always struggling to make ends meet, despite having three separate jobs and you doubted that that would ever change. it felt like you were working out of your own casket and it would probably be more sustainable to invest in one at this point.

pairing: (gong yoo/ji-cheol) the salesman x fem. reader

word count: 1.5k

contains: slight arguing, cursing but nothing too graphic tbh

"Are you sure that you don't want to come?" One of your friends asked you a little sadly since you were about to leave the group. They rarely got to see you anyway, did you have to leave so early? "You never come with us when we go out for a drink, we miss you there, you know?"

You smiled a little tiredly as you strolled casually through the streets. "I'm sorry guys, I just have to work tonight." you tried to explain. Besides, I'm fucking tired and just want to get some sleep before then. I miss my bed.

Your best friend pouted as she hugged you from the side and you welcomed it, even if it made walking a little more difficult. "It's always work this work that. Live a little for once, all this stress is not good for you. You need a break." she spoke up before a thought came into her mind that made her a little furious. "Don't tell me that you're using work as an excuse to cancel on us. We can do something else if you want to. I'll even invite you, come on!"

You took a tired breath. I don't have any energy for this. "Trust me, I'd love nothing more than to get drunk with you and I'm not being sarcastic or anything." you clarified. Besides, I wouldn't work this much if I didn't have to.

"All right." she gave in unhappy. "We'll catch you one of these days, I can feel it..."

You laughed softly. "Please do," you replied and stopped in front of the stairs that led to the subway. This was the place where you had to part ways with the others and you did with a few more hugs. You enjoyed spending time with them and loved your friends with all your heart, but you were still happy to be a bit on your own now.

So you plugged in your cable headphones and played your current favorite song at the loudest volume before checking when the next train was going to arrive. Another twenty minutes? The last one must have just left. You decided to just sit down on a bench and wait while staring blankly around and quietly mumbling the lyrics to yourself.

A few minutes later, a person sat down next to you and you could see out of the corner of your eye that it was probably some kind of businessman or something. You didn't look closely out of politeness and turned your gaze somewhere else after checking the time on your phone.

"Excuse me." the unknown man tried to get your attention, but as expected, you could barely hear him over the booming music. He placed his briefcase in the space between you before leaning closer to your figure and looking towards you with a smile and finally, you seemed to notice his stare and turned in his direction. You took out one of your earbuds as you met his gaze. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

The man leaned back again. "I haven't said anything yet. I wanted to ask if I could talk to you, do you have a moment?"

You looked around a little uncomfortably as he maintained uninterrupted eye contact with you. "Ehm, well..." you stumbled slightly over your words. "I'm not religious or anything, sorry," you replied, having no patience for another discourse about Jesus and the church. This is the fourth time this week, lucky me. You thought to yourself as you were about to put your earplug back in.

The salesman held a hand in the air to stop you from doing that to keep your attention. You just looked at him uninterestedly and waited, it was going to be a while before your train arrived anyway. A smile graced his face after you were willing to listen to him again. "That's not what I wanted to talk about, I just want to offer you a chance."

Your face tightened a little in disgust and you were quite irritated by now. He seemed to be waiting for some kind of answer and didn't say anything else, so you had no choice but to interpret his words. He doesn't look like that kind of guy, but I guess it's always the ones who look the most decent. "Listen to me asshole," you said openly this time, all politeness gone as you pointed at his chest with your index finger. "I don't know you, maybe you're one of those men who try to talk in riddles to seem mysterious or something, but right now it just sounds like you're looking for someone cheap to fuck." you replied as you tapped his tie with each syllable and leaned a little closer to him as you whispered. "And I'm not cheap, so you might want to look elsewhere."

This time it was you who grinned as he looked at you in surprise and he let out a small grunt after you finished your sentence. The salesman straightened his tie while watching your figure before reaching for his briefcase and revealing its contents, "That's too bad, but also not what I was talking about," he replied as you looked at the money and colored paper in confusion. "Have you ever played Ddakji?" He asked you as he took out the red and blue paper. You just shook your head. "That's no problem at all, we can still play it if you're up for it." 

Your gaze alternated from his hand to his face. Oh, so he's crazy. You finally concluded. I guess he is too handsome to be just a normal guy, huh. You turned your head away from him, something about the whole thing just seemed perverse to you. "No thanks, I'll pass."

"You sure?" He asked again, knowing he'd convinced you as soon as he brought the money into it. These people are all the same, she'll snatch the paper right out of my hands after I start talking a language she understands. "Every time you win, you get 100,000 won from me." He began, watching the look on your face. "But if I win, you owe me 100,000 won and -"

You sighed and interrupted him. "Yes, I'm sure. I still don't want to play with you, okay?"

This time the man looked at you with a cold, icy stare. A few minutes passed like this and you just tried to ignore his gaze, but then he started talking again. "All right. 200,000 won." he finally said, but couldn't seem to get your attention back. He tried again. "Is it because you've never played the game before? We can have a practice round if that would make you feel more comfortable." he tried again and got irritated when you continued to ignore him. He looked around the area as he considered his next move. Is she waiting for me to increase the prize money further? These people usually jump up happily at the first amount since they're so desperate. He tried to collect himself again. "500,000 won." he finally said. "I've got the money right here, you just have to go for it."

When is this stupid train coming. "Look, I don't want your fucking money, understand? I'm not a gambling addict or -"

"You may not want it, but you need it," he said, annoyed. This has never happened before, is she stupid? He then spoke out your name and described your miserable living situation as if you didn't already know about it yourself. "You also have quite a lot of debt for someone who is still relatively young, are you seriously going to turn down the money I'm offering you? For what, to prove a point or something?"

You didn't know what this man's fucking problem was, he should be glad that you didn't want to take his money, and how did he even know all this? You got up from your seat next to him when the train finally arrived and turned to face him one last time. "Fuck you," you told him and then went to the doors. You even looked out of the window at him as soon as they closed before you, to show him your the middle finger.

The man in the suit watched your figure irritated until it was gone and then, took the little card out of the inside pocket of his suit, that was meant for you. He turned it over a few times in his hand before closing the open briefcase with his other one. He had already played and lost a few Ddakji games in his life, which was the point of the whole thing - to recruit players for the actual game. However, the thought of what awaited them there meant that he was still in control of the situation. He was always in control of the situation. "I didn't loose, we haven't even played." he tried to reassure himself.

And yet the whole conversation with you left him feeling like he was utterly defeated.

[castellanapologist]

“Bless me Father for I have sinned.”

Luke sat up a little straighter on his side of the confessional, ears perking up at the voice. He recognized it, for it haunted his every waking moment and every dream. The girl who had been sitting in the front pews every Sunday for the last two months. Y/N. He cleared his throat.

“How long has it been since your last confession, my child?” He asks, fingers rubbing at his rosary.

“It has been quite a while Father, I haven’t been in two months. I’ve been so ashamed.” Y/N answers. Luke feels his chest tighten and his eyes strained to see her through the panelling. To no avail, but he pictured her beautiful face distorted in sadness.

“It’s quite alright my child, all that matters is that you’re here now” He soothes. “What sins have you come to confess?”

There’s a beat of silence before she intakes a breath and begins. “I…I have been lustful Father. Having sinful thoughts of a man I cannot have.”

Luke feels the air knock out of him. Lust? A man she cannot have? He felt a heavy jealousy weigh on his heart, but he swallows it down in favor of answering her.

“We all lust for things we cannot have sometimes. It is a sinner's nature.” He pauses before pressing further. “Is this man married?”

This time the silence stretches, and he feels himself getting antsy. His mind floods with possibilities of who it could be. He had seen her talking with couples after Mass before, could it be any of them? He wracks his brain for any man he’s seen her be alone with but comes up empty.

“Not in the traditional sense Father. He…he is married to the church.” She whispers. Luke stills, mind racing with her confession. He speaks slowly as if not to scare her off.

“As in…a priest?”

The air is thick with tension as he awaits her answer. He feels his heart thumping wildly against his chest as his fingers work his rosary over and over. Y/N sniffles before she speaks again.

“Yes. The new priest that’s recently come to our church. I didn’t mean for it to happen, Father!”

Luke feels himself shudder at the revelation that his waking torment has also been haunted by him. The confessional booth suddenly feels too small and cramped.

“What sinful thoughts have you been having of him?” He asks, his voice hoarse. Another beat of silence passes before Y/N continues.

“I’ve dreamt of him k…kissing me” She stutters before continuing. “Of his hands roaming my body and even…” She trails off. Luke inhales deeply.

“Continue.” He demands, voice rough with desire. “Confess your sins.”

“I want him to bend me over the altar” Y/N breathes. “I’ve dreamt of it for so long, even during Mass all I think about is him taking me. I even make sure he’s the one to feed me the body of Christ just to feel his fingers on my tongue.”

Luke feels his dick jump in his pants and he barely surpesses a groan. The rosary shakes in his hand as he processes what she says, the mental images burning in his brain. She describes exactly what he had been dreaming. How he would press the communion onto her tongue with a bit more force just to feel her. Luke takes a shuddering breath as he speaks again.

“It’s alright my child. Lust consumes us all. You just need to fight against it. Pray twenty Hail Marys and Our Fathers then the rosary every night for a week. Do you understand?” Luke’s voice is low, his eyes fixated on her silhouette. He sees her nod before speaking up.

“Yes Father.”

“Go in Peace.”

“Thanks be to God”

As soon as she exits the confessional booth he drops his head into his hands. His length twitches in the confines of his slacks, precum leaking onto his thigh. He tries to breathe deep but only conjures up images of fucking into that temptress in front of the whole church. Fuck. He was so fucked.

Over the next week, he watches as Y/N comes in to pray. He feels like an animal stalking his prey yet simultaneously the prey being stalked. He tries not to notice her heated gaze while he walks around the church. If he ignores this temptation and prays hard enough he knows he can get past it. But a small dark part of him knows he doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to move past it. He wants to take her, ravage her. Wants to hear her scream his name while he eats her out in the pews or on the altar.

Sunday is agonizing. Father Michael wanted him to lead service ‘as a way to connect with the youth’. Which meant he was front and center for communion. Luke tried to avoid Y/N’s gaze, seeing her beeline to his line made his dick jump. She kept her head down until she was in front of him. Like usual, she opened her mouth for the body. He thanked the Lord his robes concealed his erection, twitching pitifully as he pressed the cracker on her tongue. Her saliva coated his fingers and just as he was about to withdraw, her lips closed around them. His breath caught as she slowly pulled away, lipstick staining his skin. He thanked God again she was the last in line.

For the rest of Mass, his head swam with desire and shame. What kind of priest was he to be leaking precum while leading his church in prayer? To fist his cock every night thinking of a member from his congregation? He had to put a stop to this. After Mass, he thanked every member individually for coming. As usual, Y/N was the last to leave. When she made her way to him, his dick jolted. The lipstick stain burned his fingers as she glanced down at it.

“Thank you for coming,” Luke said, his voice hoarse. He tried to think of a way to get her in his office. “Did you enjoy the service?”

“Very much so” She breathes. Their eye contact seems to stretch on for hours, the world melting away. He coughs, turning his head away as he felt shame flush his neck.

“Would-” He coughs again to clear his throat. “Would you have spare time for a prayer?”

She studies him for a moment before nodding, dropping her eyes to the floor. “I’m all yours Father.” He swears she purrs his title. Nodding, he leads the way to his office. Like always, he does the sign of the cross at the crucifix on his door, watching Y/N do the same. She sits in the plush chair across from his, the leather squeaking from disuse. Luke takes a deep breath, her perfume invading every sense and making him dizzy.

“Wait here.” He croaks before stepping into the side room he uses for his robes. He quickly sheds the garment, hanging it on the rack. The mirror seems to mock him. There he stood, curls messy and cheeks flushed like some hormonal high school boy. He curses himself, knowing the lust is merely a test. Fixing his clerical collar, he swings open the door to greet her again.

“Thank you for meeting with me.” He says. “I’ve seen you in the church more often. I thought you might want some guidance in prayer.”

Her eyes flicker with slight embarrassment before nodding. “Yes. Any prayer with you is surely to help me on my journey.”

Luke can’t help but feel his ego swell as he sits in his desk chair. His fingers drum on the mahogany as he studies her. He knows what she desires, the sins she wants to commit. But how does he help her resist when he barely can?

“What do you need me to help with? What weighs so heavy on your soul?”

Y/N meets his gaze again, this time smoldering. Luke feels his throat close at the sight.

“Lust, Father.”

It feels like all the air is sucked out of the room when she says, no, purrs those two words. He takes a big inhale, his fingers stopping.

“Right.” Luke croaks. “It’s a normal sin to have.”

“Do you struggle with it Father?”

His cock lurches against his slacks. Nodding slowly, he speaks.

“Yes.”

His confession hangs in the air. The tension palpable in the room. After discreetly adjusting himself, he stands and rounds the desk to stand in front of her. She gazes up at him, eyes swimming with desire. His hand finds purchase on her shoulder, thumb rubbing in a circle.

“The Lord forgives all.” He breathes. To her or himself he does not know. Sliding his hand from her shoulder to her cheek, thumb still caressing her skin. She turns into his palm, kissing it softly while maintaining her eye contact. His control snaps. Surging down, he captures her lips in a bruising kiss. She wraps her arms around him, moaning into his mouth. Their mouths move passionately, deepening by the second. Luke’s hands hoist her onto his desk, scattering his sermons onto the ground.

Her tongue swipes along his lips and he eagerly parted for her. She licks into his mouth greedily as he lays her fully down on the desk. His hands explore her body with reverence, hiking up her dress to expose her creamy thighs. Luke barely can bring himself to pull away but does so anyway, wanting to watch her fall apart. His fingers press against her clit through her panties, watching her eyes roll back and her back arch.

Hooking his fingers against the band of her underwear he yanks them down, desperate to feel her wetness against his palm. He groans feeling her heat, slick coating his fingers just from skimming over her slit. Y/N moans, hips bucking to get more friction. Luke tsks and holds her down.

“Greed is a sin” Luke scolds, his thumb pressing against her throbbing clit. Y/N lets out a choked moan, hands wrapping around his wrist. “You’ll take what I give you.”

With no hesitation, he slips his middle finger into her wet heat growling as he feels her tightness. His hips grind against his desk as he fingers her. One finger turns into two as he leans down to mark her neck. Y/N clamps around him, moaning louder as his teeth sunk into her. Lukes hips stutter as he imagines her around his cock. Unable to take it anymore, he hastily unbuckles his slacks while he fingers her. Panting with relief as his dick springs free.

He adds a third finger, grinding his cock on her thigh. Y/N squirms under his hold, moaning as she gets closer to cumming. His other hand comes to rub at her clit, desperate to see her finish. It only takes a few tight circles before she seized up, pussy clamping down on his fingers as she gushed. He moans watching her soak his hand, rubbing her through her orgasm. Even as it gets too much for her he can’t stop, dragging her hips to the edge of the desk as he drops to his knees. His tongue licks up her arousal, mouth worshipping her as if she herself were God.

Y/N tries to push him away; overstimulated but he doesn’t allow it. His hands hold down her bucking hips, nose rubbing against her clit as he tongue-fucks her hole. He needs to make her cum again. More than he needs to breathe. He doubles down when her thighs squeeze around his head. Y/N’s hand tug at his curls, moaning his name so loud he's almost scared someone will hear. But he doesn’t want to shut her up; her voice rivaling an angels. Finally, finally she cums again, soaking his face. He moans against her, licking up her slick again before pulling away.

Standing, Luke's chest heaves as he stares down at her. She looked like an angel, face glowing as she gasped for breath. His hands wrap around his cock as he jerks himself off to how beautiful she looked. Even as she desperately tries to breathe, her legs spread for her priest. Luke groans deeply, stepping closer to coat his tip in her wetness. Eyes rolling back as he bumps against her clit.

“Fuck me Father Luke. Make a sinner holy” Y/N moans, reaching for him. He leans down to capture her lips in a searing kiss, letting her taste herself. His mind swims in conflict, but as Y/N guides his tip to press against her hole, it goes blank. Luke moans against her mouth as he slowly pushes in. He almost collapses on top of her as her tight heat envelops him. He braces himself on his elbows as he finally hits halfway. Y/N moans as her legs lock around him.

Slowly, so slowly, he bottoms out. Grinding his pelvic bone against her clit, he wills his orgasm back. He can’t let it end here. Pulling back, he pants as she yanks at his hair before he slams back in. His hips set a brutal pace, her wetness making lewd noises as he fucks her. He feels addicted, feeling like he’ll die if he ever stops fucking her. Y/N clenches around him and his hips stutter.

“Such a fucking temptress. Seducing your priest. Telling me how badly you wanted to be fucked at the altar, sucking my fucking fingers in Mass” Luke growls against her mouth as he fucks her harder. Y/N scratches at the back of his shirt, practically tearing through it. He watches as her eyes roll back in revelation she had confessed to him.

“It was you-?” Shes cut off by a moan as he fucks deeper into her. He huffed a laugh, twitching inside her.

“Thank God it was. Been dreaming of this cunt for months” He groans, hiking her leg up to get deeper. His pace gets impossibly faster, chasing his high. His hand reaches in between them to rub her clit, needing to see her fall apart one last time. Y/N convulses on his cock, milking him as she cums for the last time. Luke's hips stutter as he feels release wash over him, slamming into her one last time to cum as deep as he could. He collapses on top of her, both of them struggling for breath.

“I’m guessing this warrants some prayer” Y/N teases. Luke huffs a laugh, squeezing her hips.

“Come by again tomorrow, we can pray together”

[soxcietyy]

Temptation

Chapter 2 -> Chapter 3

Your dad is tired of you bringing home these unworthy men. None of them being fit to take care of you or to be given the family business since you are the only daughter. He decides to find you someone fit to be your husband and receive help from the father of the church. That’s when you meet Yuta, though just because he goes to church doesn’t mean he’s much of a saint

Mafia, murder, violence, mentions of religion, (will contain other things in the next chapters)

The date went rather well... Yes he was acting weird time by time. For example he would look at you then towards the direction of the exit and finally to his right where a group of men sat. His eyes always seemed to be darting in thoes specific spots. He was very vague with the answers to your questions and would switch the topic back to you immediately.

You could feel the floor move as he bounced his leg up and down. Was he really interested in you? To you it seemed like he was wanting this date to be over already.

Also was your dad really going to let you marry this man? Not that you disliked him but this was rather a great surprise to you.

"Don't you think I should be getting to know you a bit more?" You clasp your hands together under the table. "Tell me about your family!" You say.

He looked up at you surprised as he took a sip from his drink. "They're alive and well." Yuta puts his drink down. He the proceeds to pokes at his steak, clearly not being hungry. He had taken you to this big fancy restaurant and ordered himself the most expensive steak just so he could look at it.

"What is your field of work?" You ask as you sunk your fork into a grilled piece of fish.

Taking a sip of his wine again he chokes at the sudden question. Hes quick to regain him composure and clears his throat, answers the question after a few seconds of contemplating. "I am a business partner."

"Oh really? What is your business about?" You perk up. Obviously you knew about the business world a bit and that topic intrigued you. Your father has taught you the little bit of things that you knew.

"I don't think you would be quite interested in it. I don't sell jewelry or dresses. It's just trade, nothing your small head should worry about." He pats his front pocket and pulls out a buisness card. "I'm under the Gojo franchise."

The small card was being handed to you and you accepted it. It had the company's name written on it in a cursive font with big dark blue letters.

"What are you trying to say? That I'm not knowledgeable enough to understand any of this? Do you know who I am? I'm the daughter of one of the best wine distributors. You're literally drinking our company brand as we speak!" You furrow your brows.

He quirks his brow and lifts the glass up to take a good look at it. Inspecting it as if he actually knew how to evaluate such thing. You watch as he took a sip from the glass and tasted the drink. Dragging his eyes back to yours he simplify shrugged and put the glass to the side

Your mother has taught you about being a lady and to never let anger get the best of you. But he just spouted the most ridiculous thing ever. Did he really think he was going to win you over this way? Unbelievable, this was the last time he was ever going to see you.

"That was really good actually, the best iv ever had." Yuta smiled at you. "Right, I'm sorry for saying that. I'm just not used to being around many women. I was secluded when I was younger and was always around buisness men. I really had no time to just be a kid. The second I was able to read and write I was forced to learn everything I know now." He says before finally taking a bite out of the steak.

Was that even justifiable?! But at the same time your heart ached as he talked about his childhood. This poor man was forced to grow up too fast and never had the chance to be a boy. You reached out for his hand that rested on the table.

"Thank you for opening up to me, I know it was probably hard to tell me."

"Yea it's kind of embarrassing for me to admit that I have no experience. I told the father everything and he promised to find me a lady suitable for me. Someone kind, understanding, forgiving ... stunning." He pressed your palm onto his cheek as he looked at you.

Your heart melted as you stared at his dark blue eyes.  His soft warm cheeks made you want to pinch them.

"Goodness what am I going to do with you. Such a handsome man with a heart of gold. I want you to know that you can always rely on me." You say forgetting everything that happened a few minutes ago.

"Does that mean you'll give me a chance to go out with you?" He looks at you surprised.

You nod at him with a blush on your face.

" I'm going to treat you so well you have no idea." He pulls your hand towards his lips and plants a kiss on it.

His gaze drifted towards you as his lips stayed on your skin. Until he looked to the side and let's go.  Intertwining your hands together he couldn't help but wear a big smile on his face. You've never felt this way before but you felt excited. This was something new for you and him.

As dessert was brought to your table—dainty glasses of tiramisu layered with delicate cocoa dust—you felt his grip on your hand tighten just slightly. Not enough to hurt. Just enough to remind you that it was still there.

"I really wasn't expecting this from you," he said, voice low, like a secret only meant for your ears. "You're different. Most women I've met treat me the same way you do. Your very understanding, It's... refreshing."

"I believe in honesty," you said gently. "If we're being considered for marriage, I want to be able to trust you."

He chuckled. "And you will. You already do, don't you?"

His words left you feeling warm inside. He was watching you too closely, studying every reaction like a game of chess.

Still, you nodded. "I want to."

"That's all I ask." He leaned in, voice lowering further. "We're going to make such a strong pair. I'll be the man you've always wanted. I'll protect you and provide for you" he smiled.

"Do I need protecting?" you asked.

He paused, just briefly. Long enough to notice.

"No," he said smoothly, "but someone like you deserves to feel safe. Cherished."

You looked down at your dessert, the creamy sweetness now cloying in your mouth. Across the room, you noticed the same group of men Yuta had been glancing at earlier. One of them nodded subtly in your direction. Yuta didn't look, but you could feel the awareness between them, like invisible strings being pulled tight.

You reached for your glass, taking a long sip of the wine your father's company had poured into the world. Somehow, it grounded you.

"I think I'd like to end the evening here," you said softly.

He blinked. "Already?"

"I have a lot to think about."

He seemed to study you again, his smile not quite reaching his eyes this time. "Of course. I respect that."

But as he helped you up, his hand lingered just a little too long on the small of your back. When he walked you to the car, his gaze flicked once more to the exit, then to his right.

You wondered who was really watching whom.

Once inside the car, you glanced at the business card again. Gojo Franchise. The name was known, powerful. But vague. You made a mental note to look into it further.

He ended up taking you home but before he left he wanted to have another talk with your father. Probably saying that you both had agreed on dating. If things work out you guys should be getting married in a few years.

You watched as the both of them enter your dad's office and when the door closed your mom grabbed your hand and dragged you to the kitchen.

You looked at her shocked as she grabbed your face and searched you up and down. She ignored your questions as she investigated to her heart's content. When she decided you were in the clear she let out a sigh. She looked like she had been stressed all day.

"You arnt hurt are you?" She said worried

"No mom, Im perfectly fine. You don't look okay though." You say looking at her red puffy eyes and smudged makeup.

"I told your father to find you a good man y/n! A good man but he's so stupid." She held your arms tight. "Don't worry I'll get you of of this."

Your mom was usually a vey calm and collected person. She was the standard in your big family and everyone wanted to be rich and elegant as her. Seeing her act like this frightened you. If anyone saw her acting like this they would think that she was out of her mind.

"Mama you don't have to worry about me. Yuta is such a kind gentleman. He's not going to harm me nor is he going to kill me. I don't think he would hurt a fly actually. You can relax and be sure that everything will be fine." You hug her tight. "You can even supervise all my dates if you want. You already know it's going to take a few years before I actually go home with him or get married. Papa isn't that easy to sway." You kiss her forehead.

"Your father...I don't know what's gotten into him. I don't know why he would agree to let him take you on a date with a boy related to the Gojo's."

There it was again, that last name that keeps popping up. You might have to start investigating that family to find out what this whole thing is about.

"Y/n be careful with that boy and if your scared that something is going to happen just comply and find a way to escape him. That family, they're not to be messed with. You can seriously get hu-"

...If anyone saw her acting like this they would think that she had lost her mind.

You were about to ask what she meant when a soft voice interrupted behind you.

"We're leaving."

You flinched and so did your mother.

Yuta stood in the kitchen doorway, half in shadow, half bathed in the warm light of the nearby lamp. He wasn't angry. He didn't raise his voice. But there was something final about his tone like a judge handing down a verdict.

"Leaving?" you say to yourself.

Before you could get an answer, his hand gently wrapped around your wrist. Not tight, not painful. Just firmly.

You tried to pull back. "Wait, Yuta, my mom and I were just-"

"You've had a long night," he said, not even looking at your mother. "Let's not make it any longer."

"F/n, what the hell are you thinking?!" your mother shouted, stepping forward.

Yuta paused, then turned his head slowly toward her. Smiling at her as if what he was doing was okay. Was it?

"I'm thinking about what's best for y/n ," he said coolly. "Something I would've assumed her parents wanted too."

You didn't even hear the door shut behind you. Just the sound of crickets outside and your mother's voice breaking into something between a sob and a prayer.

You were halfway down the road in his car before the weight of everything began to settle into your chest.

You didn't remember getting in. Didn't remember him buckling your seatbelt or starting the car. His hand rested casually on the wheel. The other... softly reached over to brush your hair from your face.

"You okay, love?" he asked.

You blinked. "Yuta... who are you?"

He gave a low chuckle. "What kind of question is that

"You're not normal. I feel it. You don't talk like a normal person. You don't move like one either. You're... something else."

He kept his eyes on the road. Calm. In control. The kind of silence that wasn't empty, but strategic.

Then, finally, he exhaled. "Yuta Okkotsu. Head of the trading division for the Gojo franchise. Born and raised in Upper New York. Graduate of —"

"I know all that already," you cut him off, staring at him. "That's the résumé. Not the truth."

His eyes flicked to you briefly. There was a brief smirk at the corner of his lips—like you'd just passed a test you weren't meant to know you were taking.

"You really are clever, very curious. But I think you already know curiosity killed the cat."

You looked him up and down—and that's when you noticed it.

The pen. Tucked into his shirt pocket. Fresh ink stain near the tip. It hadn't been there earlier. He'd signed something. Recently.

"Did you just... buy me?" you asked, voice flat.

He turned his head to you again, slower this time. The mask of affection didn't fall—but it did... shift.

"Sweetheart," he said in a voice as smooth as honey, "do you really think your father would sell?"

You blinked. Your mouth went dry.

"I made him promise that if anything ever happened to you anything at all I'd take care of it personally. No questions asked."

He smiled.

He reached over and touched your hand, not gripping this time, just resting there.

"I just don't understand how we're moving so quickly. This isn't normal right? Am I the only one seeing this is weird? Not even my friends family act like this am I just not seeing the big picture?"

Then, without warning, he slammed on the brakes.

Your body jerked forward against the seatbelt. You gasped, hand flying to your chest.

"Do you always ask this many questions?" he asked, voice still calm but eyes narrowed slightly.

You stared at him, breathing hard, heart racing.

You didn't say another word the rest of the drive.

You stared out the window, watching unfamiliar neighborhoods, the gated estates, tall hedges, mansions perched on hills. This wasn't your side of town. It wasn't even your world. You had no idea how far you were from home... or if you'd even recognize it anymore.

The car slowed, then came to a deliberate stop in front of wrought-iron gates. A man in a black suit stepped out of the shadows and nodded, opening them wordlessly. Beyond the gates stood a massive white mansion, stoic and cold, with creeping vines etched along the stone. A line of luxury cars sat off to the side.

He opened your door and extended his hand.

You hesitated but took it anyways.

Inside, he led you through the foyer and straight upstairs, not once raising his voice or breaking stride. It felt... rehearsed. Like he'd done this before.

You tried to absorb the details: pristine walls, dark wood floors, the faint scent of polished cedar. Everything gleamed like it had been scrubbed within an inch of its life.

You stumbled on the fourth step, catching yourself with a sharp intake of breath.

Yuta stopped immediately.

He turned, eyes softening as if he were concerned. "Careful," he murmured, his hand settling lightly on your back. "Wouldn't want you hurting yourself. Not here."

You nodded faintly, unsure why that last part felt like a warning.

He slowed his pace, allowing you to keep up. Every inch of the house whispered money and secrecy.

His room was massive, larger than your room back home. Cream walls, heavy curtains, a king-sized bed with untouched linen. Furniture too expensive to look lived-in. Not a single photo in sight.

He guided you to a plush chair in the corner, then turned away without explanation. You watched as he emptied his pockets onto the dresser: a money clip, a lighter, a pen... and something small and shiny. A cuff link.

He threw his coat over the back of the armchair and moved to the mirror, adjusting his collar. You stayed silent, waiting.

Then he spoke.

"I'm heading downstairs to take care of a few things. You can stay here. Do whatever it is girls like to do when left alone." He glanced at your reflection in the mirror. "But you are staying here. Understood?"

You blinked. "Why? "

"Because I said so." His voice wasn't loud, but it was firm. Then he turned, all warmth again. "No matter what you hear... ignore it."

Your eyes met his. His were calm. Too calm. That fake kind of calm that comes right before a storm.

You gave him a silent nod.

"Splendid," he whispered.

He walked back over to you slowly, deliberately, and leaned down to press a kiss against your forehead. You froze.

"You really are... special," he murmured. "Maybe later we'll have a little fun, hm?"

Your hand instinctively reached for the cross necklace resting on your clavicle.

He paused, catching the motion.

Amusement flickered across his features. "Of course," he said, as if reminded you still believed in something bigger than him.

Without another word, he walked out and quietly shut the door behind him

You felt like you could finally breathe properly.

You stood, walked to his coat, and began searching the pockets. Your hands trembled. From one you pulled folded receipts, a few bills, a half-empty pack of cigarettes, and a creased sheet of paper.

Unfolding it revealed your name scribbled alongside a mess of numbers coordinates? Bank codes? Something about it felt important. You tucked it into your dress quickly, ears straining for footsteps.

Then something metallic caught your eye.

A cuff link you saw him have. You picked it up, inspecting the elegant, engraved design.

The more you looked at it the more it reminded you of the one your dad wore. It was a cuff link, these were used a show off wealth and status. Usually the things on them had meaning. This design was one you remember seeing somewhere. Holding it up to the light you look at it more trying to catch every detail you could. Then you remember that you saw it in the card he had given you. Quickly you looked for the card you had stuffed somewhere.

You searched your bag and yanked out the card Yuta had given you weeks ago. The design matched. Identical. You weren't imagining it.

Then—pop.

The cuff link slipped from your grasp,

You gasped as it hit the floor making a loud echo. That's when it started to roll away from you. Quickly you got up and ran to grab it but missed the first time. It was rolling faster and faster gaining speed. You struggled to grab it and by the time it stared to loose momentum it had went under the double doors.

No. No, no

You cracked the door open just enough to see it spin out of sight. Down the stairs.

Cuff links can range from cheap to very expensive and that's one looked like it was worth a heavy penny. He'd probably get angry if something happened to it.

You cursed under your breath, kicked off your heels, and padded down the hallway barefoot. Each creak of the floorboard made your heart skip. The house was too quiet.

Everytime the cuff link made impact on a step, a loud clink could be heard. You wince at each sound it made.

Finally, at the bottom of the stairs, you caught the cuff link. You sighed in relief.

Just as you thought you were good you heard a deep voice said behind you, "Well, Haven't seen one of you in a while."

You turned sharply.

A tall man stood across the room, bald but with a wild beard, eyes dark and amused.

You stepped back. "One of me?"

"You know. Another girl." He chuckled. "You didn't think you were the first, did you?"

Your mouth went dry. "So there were others." He lied?!

"Oh yeah. Might still be one locked in a closet somewhere." He winked, but it wasn't funny. "Man's important. Too important to be alone."

You swallowed hard. "He's really that important?"

The man laughed. "Yuta Okkotsu is the reason the Gojo franchise didn't collapse five years ago. While others talk, he acts. Then again, he literally m-"

BANG.

A gunshot rang through the hall.

You dropped to the floor, covering your head instinctively.

Silence followed. Then heavy footsteps.

When you looked up, Yuta stood at the base of the stairs, gaze fixed on you.

"I told you to wait upstairs."

Behind him you could see a crowed of men walking out a room. He must of just gotten out of a meeting but why was it at his house?

He quickly snagged your attention by grabbing your face.

"You're not answering," he said, brushing your hair behind your ear with fingers far too gentle for how tense the air had become.

There was no point in lying to him. Slowly you open your hand and show him the cuff link. He looked at you surprised and took it from you.

His brow lifted slightly. He took it, turned it in his fingers, then smiled—soft and strange.

"Ah... Were you bringing this to me? You knew I had a meeting?"

His ears turned faintly pink, as if your gesture had touched something human in him. You had no idea how he reached that conclusion, but you didn't correct him.

"That was... thoughtful." His voice dipped, dangerously tender. Then his gaze dropped. "Where are your heels?"

You looked down at your bare feet.

You laughed weakly. "They were... slowing me down."

"Clearly." He scooped you up effortlessly and carried you up the stairs like you weighed nothing. "What am I going to do with you?"

Over his shoulder, you looked back at the hallway—only to see two men dragging something heavy, wrapped in a tarp, out through a side door.

Your stomach twisted.

"Y/N," Yuta said, as if nothing had happened, "let's get some rest. We have a long day tomorrow."

And with that, the door shut behind you once more.

But this time... it stayed locked.

He laid you back down on the bed like you were glass.

As he adjusted the blankets around you, his eyes softened again. As if everything moments ago hadn't happened. As if the gunshot hadn't rung through the marble halls.

"You're still adjusting," he said, brushing your cheek with the back of his hand. "I shouldn't have left you alone knowing how you are.

"You don't know me." It was a fact, he basically just met you.

Tomorrow," he whispered, placing you gently on the edge of the bed, "you'll wear something light. Nothing flashy. You'll need to be presentable, but not memorable." He ignored your comment.

"For what?" you asked, barely above a whisper.

Again you were ignored.

He opened a drawer and pulled out one of his button downs. He looked at it for a second before handing it to you.

"Sleep in this. It should cover up enough, not that it matters."

You snatch it from him. Biting your trembling lip.

"You're tired. And scared. I get it." He leaned forward and kissed your temple. "So I'll give you tonight. Just tonight."

You swallowed hard, not trusting your voice.

"Get some sleep," he whispered. "And tomorrow... smile. That's all I ask."

He walked to the door, unlocked it again, and turned the knob slowly.

"Goodnight." His eyes lingered on you from across the room. Then he left.

[crystalgastles]

After the flesh

This is the fourth chapter of my Jeff the killer fanfiction it’s posted on ao3 as well

I had opened the sliding glass door when I saw him running up through my back yard, calling my name loud enough to where I could hear it through the glass. Disheveled hair and shifty eyes that looked red were locked onto mine. When I grabbed his forearms and tried to see if he was injured.

“Woah okay”

I stumbled back a little when he fell onto his knees head buried into my ribs while his hand’s reached around my back, clinging onto my bones in an iron grip. I tried to figure out if he’d gotten a head injury while his shoulders shook, bated shaky breaths warming my clothing and I tried to make out what he was saying.

“Hear me know I exist why aren’t you listening, I have sinned but so has everyone else I need to know you’re there”

I couldn’t figure out if he was talking to me but when I tried to pull away he held on tighter, keeping me stuck in between my kitchen and doorway.

I felt bad, I didn’t know what he’d done or seen to react this way but I didn’t know him, truly. I had just finished putting our Christmas tree up when I heard him calling for me from outside. My cd player was still going quietly when I answered the door to this crying mess of a man.

“Jeff, hey can you come inside and tell me what happened it’s cold out there”

He let go. Not saying anything as he stood up and looked away from me, At the outside and came into the kitchen. The lights from the tree seemed to make him wince.

I struggled with the door and finally got it shut after some push and pull. Staring at the slush that coated the ground of my back patio while the tears that stained my shirt started to become cold. He was looking at me, and I wondered what he had to say next. What brought on this confession to me as if I were a priest.

“What happened?”

“I’m sorry.”

“No. What happened quit dodging my questions with half assed answers”

“I burnt down a manger”

“Why did you burn down a manger”

“Cause I felt like it. Is that a good enough answer for you, mom”

He said that last part with a sharp incline, this is fucking bullshit. I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t ask for his presence and I didn’t ask to be treated like a nuisance in my own home with someone I barely knew.

“No. No! You don’t get to talk to me like that while you’re standing in my kitchen. I let you in. Tell me what happened or you can get out.”

“I already told you.”

“Ok then leave”

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me”

“Obviously, I don’t know anything about you. I’ve seen you twice”

“I don’t like Christmas”

“A lot of people don’t, they don’t kill people though. Or burn down Christmas decorations”

He sighed, rubbing his hands on the sides of his temples while I crossed my arms. Waiting for a more appropriate explanation to this sudden outburst, and why he came to me.

“Do you have alcohol”

“I have half a four loko in the fridge”

I sat on my couch while he stood in the kitchen, grimacing when he downed a week old party drink only teenagers and broke college students enjoyed. I rested my chin on my open palm to keep my eye on him from the living room.

“My daddy was a preacher. I was the oldest son of two boys and I was expected to also follow in line of the rest of the men in my family of becoming one too”

“Yeah?”

“1988, I was seven years old. I had night terrors and I’d sleep walk. Parents thought I was possessed , had me exercised three times until I just didn’t sleepwalk anymore. We weren’t even catholic.”

I didn’t say anything when he moved into the living room in front of me. Sitting on the ground cross legged he rubbed circles on his knees with his palms.

“When I was 14 I refused to get baptized. The last time they made me go to church I broke everything of value in the living room.”

He laughed quietly to himself before he continued. I bit the inside of my cheek, playing with a loose thread on the couch as I listened.

“You uncomfortable?”

“No, it’s ok really I asked you to tell me why”

“Ok. I refused to get baptized so four grown men, men I grew up with held me down and threw me into the baptism pool.”

I bit the side of my thumb. I couldn’t tell if he was telling the truth or if this was a sob story to get me to trust him. But the way he fidgeted with his hands told me this was something he was recalling.

“One of them was my best friends dad. She was gone then. He’d sent her to some sort of camp for troubled teens. He found out that she had a girlfriend, and that I was also hiding that fact from him.”

“Yeah?“ I didn’t know what to say because ‘I’m sorry’ didn’t seem to be enough or the right words For what he was telling me.

“I moved out at 17, lived on my own for a few months until ,parents reported me missing. I came back a few months before my eighteenth”

I watched him down the rest of the alcohol, his eyes trained on my Christmas tree to think of what to say next. I stared at my feet, his hands, my hands

“My birthday is on Christmas. The day I turned 18 I was forced to go to a service, got into a fight with my dad after dinner. And I killed them. My mother first. With A gun I got from a friend, tried and failed to kill my brother next I stabbed him once and couldn’t finish the job. My father was last. And the longest. I couldn’t recreate all of pain and suffering he inflicted onto me for my entire childhood but, I sure did make him feel afraid.”

“I” I still didn’t know what to say. The words wouldn’t spill from my lips as I tried to wrap my head around what I had been told, my own family issues seemed so minuscule in this moment that I contemplated calling my mom. Tell her I love her.

“My friend, Jane. I trusted her with anything I had. She was smart and put together, stubborn and almost always right, I was angry and a mess. I burned her house to the ground. I ran into that fire to find her but stayed because it had turned into hell. And that’s where I belonged. She wasn’t even in there. She snuck out to her girlfriends. I only came out when I heard her screaming. I haven’t seen her since”

“You have a thing with fire”

“Yeah”

I didn’t say anything else. I didn’t know what to say, so I just moved to the floor and sat beside him with my head on his shoulder. I contemplated telling my own stories but I didn’t want to. I don’t think I could even make the words come out of my mouth even if I wanted to. I knew what I did and I knew there was nothing i could do to fix it. No matter how much I begged and pleaded for anyone to just talk to me. My god was my father. And I hade none. All I had now was him to keep me company and I wasn’t going to complain.

“Do you want to go to my room, I don’t know how the Christmas tree is making you feel”

“No, it’s fine”

He let me rest my head on him, his breathing had slowed and my shirt had dried. His hand rested on my knee while I stared off into the Christmas lights.

“I want to go to my room anyway, if you want you can follow me. The heat doesn’t work as well out here”

“If you insist.”

I picked up my computer off of my bedside table, I usually checked my emails at this time of night but he hadn’t seen a computer in a while so he was busy pressing buttons and looking up dumb websites with my browser.

“Please be careful you’re gonna give me a virus”

“A man can’t use the internet”

“No you just can’t click on every pop up ad you see”

“Ok then I don’t want to use the internet anymore”

I rolled my eyes and shut my computer, crossing my arms and looking down at him from my sitting position I watched him sit up and pull off the hoodie he had on. A different one from the one I gave him. I wondered where he got that one from but shook the thought from my head. His arms were pale, I could see blue veins peaking out from almost white skin a deep contrast from the black of the t shirt he wore underneath.

“You stare a lot”

“Hm.”

“I stare too, you just don’t catch me”

“That’s creepy”

“Sure. I know”

I kept looking while he looked at me, the inside of my cheek almost being bitten off while my heart threatened to burst out of my chest.

The way he sat up to take off his hoodie positioned him directly above my head. My cheeks burned and the tips of my fingers tingled when I laced my fingers through his hair, bringing his face closer to mine. His surprised hum when I kissed him made me hold onto his hair into a tighter grip. His hand moved to right above my elbow the other behind my neck.

I pulled away for a minute to breathe. My face stung and I moved to sit on the middle of his thighs. I needed to respond. The Last words needed to be mine.

“Fuck you”

[j0eyj0rdis0n]

can we have a little sneak peak of the request you’re working on?:3

I supposeee.... JK of course you can!! More WIP's for everybody! I'll give you three like I always do. Some of them aren't the best right now, just means I need to go back and revise them a bit. But hey! That's all part of the process!

I also have some oneshots that I've been in the process of writing on the side, as well as my kingdom AU! So whatever is listed here is certainly not all!

But as always, my ask box and messages are always open! Hit me up! Send songs I may like! Throw a request in the ask box! Or possibly some of your own headcanons if you feel so inclined!

1). Okay! #1! This request is about Schneider being on a solo mission with a non-romantic reader and them talking about their pasts. That's really the short and sweet version of it (even though i really love long asks/headcanons).

"Schneider?" You broke the silence, hoping desperately that he would go along with your conversation.

"Hm."

"What did you do before all of this..?" You asked hesitantly, not wanting to upset him especially since you two would be sitting in this damned car for hours.

Neither of you had really discussed conversational boundaries, what was and wasn't okay to be talked about. You assumed it was a sensitive subject since he had never made any effort to tell you anything about himself. From how his eye turned out the way it was, to anything about his past, or his girlfriend who awaited him each night at home. He gave you a stern look before refocusing on the landscape in front of him, resuming the silence that you’d begun with. Welp... So much for that...

2). The next one I've been working on is about Schneider going to church and praying for his girlfriend. Again, a short and sweet version of a beautifully long ask. I absolutely love how in depth they went with their writing and it was incredibly thought provoking. This is just a little piece of what I wrote in response. It's titled, "In Her Name, I Pray."

"Amen." Schneider mumbled, opening his eyes and standing once more. His knees stung from the hard floor that was just beneath them, reminding himself that a little pain was worth it if it was for your soul. His blue eye fell once more on the candle he had lit for you, flickering every so often. The small flame reminded him of your heart, warm and kind, lighting the way for him when he needed it most.

Turning around he was met with one of the regular church goers, an older lady he hadn't bothered to learn the name of. He probably never would. Startled, he took a small step back, plastering a polite closed-lipped smile on his face.

"Christian!" She spoke happily, though not loud enough to disrupt the people around them.

He internally grimaced, forgotten he'd given her Flake's name instead of his own. It's not like he used it anyways.

3). This request is about Ich Will Schneider playing with his girlfriend's hair. They said they didn't care if it was platonic or romantic, but based on my headcanon post I made, I find that it would be most fitting to be a romantic reader.

The sound of your groans pulled him from his thoughts, watching as you sat up slowly while rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. He forced himself to hold back a chuckle at your disheveled hair and your squinted eyes, not quite adjusted to the midday light yet.

"Morning my love." He spoke gently, a smile evident in his voice. "Sleep well?"

Giving him a tired nod you laid back down, wrapping your arms around his midsection, resuming a more comfortable snuggle position. This time he couldn't hold back his chuckle, letting his large hand find it's way into your hair as he admired your cute features.

Other requests that I've recently received are...

A request about Schneider's girlfriend reacting to his eye injury. (I'm thinking of it as a oneshot that adds onto the original fic I wrote about him sustaining the injury in the first place. I'll link it here.)

A request about the reader getting shot! (I love looooove angst, so thank you for this one)

A request where the reader gets kidnapped and abused/tortured during a mission (another awesome angsty request!)

Another wonderfully long ask that I really enjoyed reading. It's about the reader seeing Schneider be rather violent and how she would react to that situation, and how he would react to her reaction of course.

And last but not least, a request based on a repost I made. I will link it here. Some good ol' smut is in order with this one!

[dialovers-translations]

Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN ー Kino Ecstasy [Epilogue]

ー The scene starts with the night sky

Yuuri: ...Fufu. What’s the matter, Kino...?

You’ve been running away the whole time...That’s nothing like you.

Why not use those powers you’re so pride of, huhーー!?

*Woosh* 

Kino: ...Fufu. You fool...If I were to do that, I could send you flying the blink of an eye.

That wouldn’t be fun now, would it?

Yuuri: ...! Haah!

*Woosh*

*TIMESKIP*

*Woosh*

Kino: ...Kuh.

Yuuri: ...For someone as great as you, you seem to be struggling quite a bit against a ‘mere Ghoul’?

Why not get serious already?

Kino: ...I don’t want to. I hate it when people tell me what to do. 

Yui: ...

( He isn’t just not using his powers. It’s that he can’t use them. )

( Because he knows that Yuuri-san will die if he does. )

( I’m sure that Kino-kun doesn’t want for that to happen. That’s why... )

Yuuri: ...I see. You leave me no other choice then. ーー !

*Woosh* 

*Stab* 

Kino: Kuh...!

ー Kino falls to his knees

*Thud*

Yui: Kino-kun!!

Yuuri: ...Fufu. You let your guard down, Kino...

Kino: ...Heh. Don’t get ahead of yourself because you managed to get a small scratch on me...?

Yuuri: This wouldn’t have happened if you had just used your powers right away.

You’ve always been like that...At the very end...You just can’t help but let the kind heart inside of you show.

That’s why...!

*Woosh*

Kino: Ugh...

Yui: Stopーー!!

Monologue

Yuuri lowered the blade in his hand towards me,

as I sat there knelt down in front of him. 

I close my eyes.

For some reason, at that moment,

I suddenly remembered the day,

when I was taken to Yuuri’s home as a child.

I was so terribly afraid of everything and everyone...

but it was Yuuri,

who reached out his hand to me,

as I sat there shivering in the corner of the room.

Even though back then,

his hand was much smaller,

and way less reassuring than it is now.

But back then,

it was most definitely the hand which saved me.

In the end,

I don’t think I have the heart to kill Yuuri. 

In which case...

...Even though I thought that way,

in the end, Yuuri’s blade never came down.

After allーー 

*Cling* 

Yuuri: ... 

What do you think you’re doing...? 

Kino: ( ...What? )

Richter?: I am sorry, but I am afraid your little game ends here. This man shall come with us, alive. 

Yuuri: ...Excuse me? That’s not what you promised...!

Richter?: The bishop’s words are law. Those who stand in our way...ーー shall be erased. 

*Woosh* 

Yuuri: ...! Uwaaaahーー!!

Kino: ...!

Male Ghoul A: Yuuri!

Male Ghoul B: That was a low move...! How could you!

Richter?: You pesky Ghouls...Know your place.

*Woosh*

Male Ghoul A: !

Male Ghoul B: Uwaaaah!

Richter?: Can somebody else get Ayato from the dungeon? Also get rid of all remaining Ghouls.

I shall take care of Kino.

Male Clergyman A: Roger.

ー The men run off

Richter?: ...

ー Kino walks up to Yuuri

Kino: ...Yuuri?

Yuuri: ...

Kino: Hey, Yuuri. Talk to me...

Yuuri: ...

Kino: ...I thought you were going to kill me? You were talking big about it! How it’s your duty and all...

Answer me!

Yuuri: ...

Kino: ...Why...?

*Thud* 

Richter: ...Well then, Kino. You shall be coming with me. 

Kino: Yuuri...ーー!!

Monologue

Yuuri-san is dead. 

Richter-san is the one who killed him.

ーー No, scratch that. 

It’s that guy who we met in the Demon World before. 

Someone who looks just like Richter-san, but is an entirely different person.

The large group accompanying him,

are the same people from before,

which I can only assume are associated with the Church.

At the hands of those men,

the remaining Ghouls dropped like flies.

I was unable to do anything,

simply witnessing the scene dumbfounded.

After a while,

once things had gone quiet once again,

I realized that Kino-kun,

was nowhere to be seen.

Yui: ( No way...Where is Kino-kun...? )

( I have to go after him...But what should I do...? )

Kou: Ah! M-neko-chan, found you~!

Yui: ...!

ー Kou and Laito run up to her

Kou: Fufu. Sorry for the delay! We’re here to come pick you up~

Yui: Kou-kun...Everyone...

Laito: Honestly, knowing that you are safe at the very least is what matters most~

Yui: ...But Kino-kun was taken away...

Shuu: Kino...? They took him with them as well and not just Ayato?

Yui: Exactly...I have to go after them right away, or I’m sure it won’t end well...

Kou: I’m pretty sure those guys are the same ones who hurt Ruki-kun before. In other words...

Shuu: ...The Church, huh...?

Yui: ...

I don’t know why, but it seems like the Church has been trying to get their hands on Ayato-kun for a while...

I have a bad feeling about it. Kino-kun might be in trouble as well...

Laito: Nfu~ Geez, Bitch-chan. Kino-kun this, Kino-kun that. Seems like you have quite the soft spot for that guy...

Yui: Eh!?

Laito: I love that slutty side of yours but...I’m pretty sure Ayato-kun will be disappointed in you. 

Yui: ...That’s not true. Ayato-kun is long aware.

Laito: Eeh!? Hold on, time out~! What do you mean by that!? What on earth happened!? 

Shuu: Haah...Shut up. Who cares about that. Right now we have to focus on Ayato instead.

Anyway, now that Ayato is in their hands, we have to act as well. 

I don’t want this whole situation to get even more sticky.

Laito: In other words, we’ll go pick a fight with the Church? 

Shuu: Yeah, that’s what it boils down to...

Kou: In that case, let’s go kick their butt real quick~!

Laito: In that case, I’ll be in charge of bringing Bitch-chan to safety. Well then, shall we go? 

Yui: W-Wait...! Can’t I come along as well...?

Shuu: You’ll go to the Church...?

Yui: I realize that I might only get in the way...but I’m worried about the two of them...

Shuu: ...

...Do as you please?

Laito: ...Shuu!?

Yui: ...! Thanks, Shuu-san!

Shuu: ...However, prepare yourself. 

Yui: Eh...?

( What does he mean by that...? )

Shuu: Haah...Let’s go.

Kou: Roger~! Come on, off we go, M-neko-chan!

Yui: Y-Yeah...!

ー The scene shifts to the dungeon at the Church

*Cling*

Male Clergyman A: Come on, get in.

*Rustle*

Kino: ...!

*Thud*

Kino: ...Ow...

*Rattle*

Monologue

After being taken away from the scene,

I was thrown into the Church’ dungeon,

together with Ayato.

The cell had been induced,

with an anti-magic seal,

which those guys happen to be such experts at,

so my powers were completely blocked.

However,

I no longer gave a damn. 

I couldn’t even bring myself,

to put those guys from the Church through hell,

in an attempt to avenge Yuuri’s death.

I mean, even if I were to do that,

Yuuri won’t come back to life. 

It’d only make me feel even more empty inside.

Revenge is pointless. 

That’s what Yui told me before. 

However...

I didn’t think,

this would be how I finally,

come to realize the truth in those words.

Kino: ...

( It’s my fault. I should have never gotten involved with the Church... )

( ...But I guess it’s too late for regrets now... )

*Rustle rustle*

Kino: ( ...It’s too late. For everything... )

Ugh...

Ayato: ...Oi, Kino. Are you awake?

Kino: ...I am. You really think I can sleep on this hard of a bed?

Ayato: Hah. What’s that? I thought you were feelin’ down but you seem to be doin’ just fine. 

Kino: ...Not really. I’m not feeling down or anything.

Ayato: Say. What do you think the Church will do with us?

Kino: Good question. Beats me. They’ll probably execute us to show off their own power?

I mean, I don’t care about what they’ll do. 

Ayato: Haah? You don’t care...? It’s your problem as well though, isn’t it!?

Kino: ...

Ayato: Che, cat got your tongue, huh? God, my big bro really doesn’t know what he wants, huh? 

Kino: ...Eh? 

( Did he just...refer to me as his big bro...? )

Ayato: Ah? I’m not wrong, am I? I mean, you’re the one who introduced yourself as such.

Kino: ...I did, but...

Ayato: I mean, I did think it smelt fishy at first. For that shitty Old Man to have a secret lovechild... 

But you know, I don’t know why, but right now, I’m pretty sure that you’re speaking the truth.

I mean, you’re just like my other brothers. Like how you’re a huge pain in the ass.

Kino: ...Excuse me...?

( Brothers... )

( Exactly. This guy, as well as the other Sakamaki’s, we all share the same blood... )

( We’re all sons of Karlheinz... )

ー Somebody approaches the cell

Ayato: ...! Richter...!? 

Richter?: Kino. The Bishop is waiting. You shall be coming with me. 

*Clatter* 

Richter?: ...Come here.

Kino: ...What if I say no?

Richter?: The Bishop’s word is law. ーー Come.

*Thud* 

Kino: Guh...!

Ayato: ...! Lay it off!

Richter?: ...Ayato. You shall stay there and behave.

That is what the Bishop wants...

Kino: ...That hurts! Let me go!

ー Kino is taken away

Ayato: ...The fuck was that just now...?

That guy...isn’t Richter...

ー The scene shifts to the Church

*Creaaak*

Kino: For the millionth time, let me go!

Richter: ...

*Thud* 

Kino: Uwah...!

ー Kino drops to the floor

???: Fufu, so you are here...

Richter?: My sincere apologies for the wait, Bishop...

Kino: ...You’re the Bishop...?

Bishop: Yes, exactly. Well then, Kino. Let us get started right away.

Kino: Start what... ーー !?

Male Clergyman A: Hold him down!

Male Clergyman B: We’ll hang him from that cross!

After being crucified, 

I was surrounded by a strange group of men clad in white. 

Judging from their appearance which reminded me of scientists,

I could only assume,

that they were not actually part of the Church

Kino: What’s going on here, huh?

Bishop: Fufu. We would like to show a certain technique we have developed to you... 

Kino: Haah? Excuse me? 

Do you guys have to do that sort of stuff now as well? What happened to worshipping God, huh?

Bishop: Oh, not at all. It’s just that we realized...

Why is it that we had no other choice but to submit to Demons? Because we do not have any magic ourselves, that is...

Even with modern science at our disposal, it was difficult to create magic.

After many experiments, the most we could do was seal away someone else’s powers...

Kino: Heh, well duh...Magic isn’t something which can be ‘crafted’. 

Bishop: Exactly. You are absolutely right.

That’s why we decided to take a different route.

Kino: A different route...?

( What does he mean by that...? )

Bishop: If we cannot create magic.

Why not make those with magic submit to us and have them use their powers for our own benefit?

In other words...All we need is create Demons who will act as our loyal servants. Take Richter over there, for example. 

Kino: ...!

Richter: ...

Kino: ( Then, this guy is actually Richter...who should have died back then...? )

...So that’s why you went to retrieve his corpse, huh...?

Bishop: Aah, yes. We revived him using the power of modern science. As our watchdog...

The era in which us humans get to take revenge on Demons has come at last...

But to achieve that, we need a couple of more slaves...

Kino...Ones which have strong powers like you, do you understand...?

Kino: ...!

( These guys...So that’s why they...! )

Male Clergyman A: ...Bishop, excuse us. The Vampires in question are standing in front of the Church...

Kino: ...Vampires...?

Bishop: ...Excuse me? Fufu...I see. 

If they want to willingly sacrifice themselves, fine by me. Let them in.

Male Clergyman A: Roger!

Bishop: Seems like your brothers and Vampire comrades have come to visit us.

I can only assume that the ‘Chosen Eve’ is with them as well.

Kino: ...!

( Yui... )

Monologue

Standing in front of the open door,

I instinctively came to a halt. 

Surrounded by a bunch of men dressed in white,

Kino-kun seemed to have been attached,

to some kind of weird cross statue. 

Furthermore,

standing right next to him...was a man,

I did not expect to see in the slightest.

Kino: ...! Why did you come here!?

Yui: Kino-kun...

( What on earth...is going on...? )

Shuu: Hah...You freak...

Bishop: Fufu, run your mouth all you want...

Yui: ( ...I’m sure of it...That man is... )

Male Clergyman B: Bishop, everything is ready.

Bishop: ...I see. I suppose this is a good opportunity for you guys to witness the show.

Of how Kino is turned into our loyal dog...through this wonderful technique created by us humans...

Monologue

That man who goes by the title of Bishop,

is Komori Seiji. 

ーー My Father, who had supposedly gone missing. 

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

[foggyfanfic]

Love and Fury

Chapter Preview: A lot of hands went up, then out of the corner of her eye she saw Señor Gutierrez raise his hand, she turned to stare at him. The rest of the village followed her gaze, and slowly every other hand sank until Señor Gutierrez was the only person with their hand raised.

CH 1 Prev Next Master List

33. ...Tribulations

“Alright, we have heard from all witnesses and each of Cicero’s victims, it is time for us to make our decision,” Alma said, standing at the table now placed front and center of the church, “will we allow this man to remain in our village.”

The whole village began talking at once and Alma tapped her gavel a few times to cut through the noise. It wasn’t often the people of Encanto went through this, so she could forgive them for being a bit disorderly, but the fact remained they would get nothing done if they talked over eachother.

“One at a time, we will hear arguments both for and against banishing Cicero, I assure you, but we must do this in an orderly fashion.”

It was like the whole village took one collective breath, and released it as a communal sigh. She looked over the crowd, debating who to give the floor to first. After his outburst, Señor Gutierrez had made Cicero stay home. Similarly, Cicero’s victims had already cast their votes and, with the exception of Pepa, were avoiding the trial.

Pepa sat next to Félix, who had Felípe on his other side. Alma pursed her lips. Everybody already knew how Felípe felt, he wouldn’t bring up anything they hadn’t heard him say down at the cantina. Then again, it was hard to find an argument more convincing than “I don’t trust him not to hurt my future wife and baby.” It would be best to end with that.

Padré raised his finger, and she fought the urge to scowl, she couldn’t ignore people who wished to speak just because she thought they would argue on Cicero’s side, but if this self-righteous boy who had the nerve to call himself a priest said anything about forgiving Cicero, after the sermon he’d given damning Rosalie, Alma just might shove her gavel up his ass.

She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and reminded herself she was a community leader now. She no longer had the luxury of thinking such things.

“Yes Padré? You have the floor.”

“Gracias Señora,” Padré stood, he took a deep breath then looked around at his congregation, “when Señora Rosalie was first found, I gave a sermon on the dangers of alcohol and sex. A sermon I have come to deeply regret.”

He paused as people muttered quietly, apparently marshaling his thoughts.

“It was easier to assume that Rosalie had simply over-imbibed and was trying to save face by pretending to have been taken advantage of, it was less scary than believing her,” Padré continued, “None of us wanted to believe that somebody in our village could be capable of true cruelty. We still don’t, it is still quite tempting to hide behind the fiction that what Cicero has done to Rosalie wasn’t quite that bad. He barely bruised her, after all. And he couldn’t have predicted that her parents would abandon her, surely he didn’t mean to do as much harm as he did.”

A few people were nodding, and if she wasn’t currently acting as a village leader, Alma would have given each of them the stink eye. As it was, she did her best to ignore those who apparently held the opinion that Padré was describing. Instead, when Padré looked at her, she gave him one quiet nod in order to encourage him.

“I was only six when this village was founded, I don’t truly remember what it is like to live without the protection of the miracle. I don’t truly know what it is to fear that men may come and pillage our village, raze our crops, and savage our women,” he paused, “and I don’t want to. I am quite happy to live in a world where women need not fear walking home at night, where might doesn’t make right, where we each treat each other with the grace and compassion that God intended.”

Alma glanced at Señor Gutierrez, then did a double take, his face was crumpled with the effort to hold back tears. She gulped, feeling a split second of sympathy for the man. How must it feel to know your own son has desecrated paradise?

“Ignoring the horror, the cruelty, of what Cicero has done may feel safer, but it does nothing to protect you. We have received a blessing from God, a little pocket of peace and security, our very own Garden of Eden,” Padré held his hands out, palm up, as if begging the villagers to listen to him, “is it not our job to maintain this paradise? To tend to the garden? To keep it safe, protect it as it has protected us? I vote to banish Cicero, for the good of our community, and I implore each of you to do the same.”

Padré sat and Alma clenched her fists to keep from applauding. She took a deep breath to keep the smile off her face as she stood and straightened her skirt.

“Very well put Padré, thank you for those words, who wishes to speak next,” she asked, examining the hands that immediately went up, eventually she chose that of Juan, who worked in the coffee orchard, “what do you have to say, Señor?”

Juan stood, nodding his thanks at her before turning his gaze to the other villagers, “Padré is right, we do live in a paradise. I was also a child when we came to this place, and I neither know nor wish to know the depths of human cruelty. But that is exactly what it’ll be if we kick Cicero out of the only home he’s ever known, cruelty.”

Alma sighed through her nose but otherwise made no indication of her displeasure. She braced herself to hear a lot of stuff she didn’t agree with.

“I’m not arguing that what Cicero did was alright, by all means, I think he needs to face some sort of justice. But exile?! You want to rip the guy away from his friends, his home, his future? His son?”

A few people grumbled angrily at that last point, but nobody interrupted.

“What he did was bad, but it’s not like he killed somebody. And now that we know about it, we can protect the women from him. We don’t need to exile him in order to keep our village safe,” Juan scoffed at the idea, “Encanto hasn’t come as far as it has by turning our back on our own. We are a community of people who love and care about each other, and sometimes loving somebody means turning the other cheek. If we exile Cicero for this, what will be next? Will we exile everybody who has sex out of wedlock? That’s half the town!”

One of the women in the crowd started to say something, only to get shushed by her husband. She gave her husband a shocked look then her face twisted with rage, Alma strongly suspected she had just seen the end of a marriage.

“Again, I ain’t saying we let the guy off the hook, I just think exile is a bit too extreme of a punishment. He made one mistake, why would we ruin his entire life over it?” That said, Juan sat back down, a lot of people began talking at once. Alma banged her gavel until the village quieted back down.

“One at a time, remember, one at a time,” she insisted, then took a few deep breaths as the crowd fully settled, “who is next?”

“That’d be me,” the woman who had been shushed rocketed to her feet, swatting at her husband’s hands when he tried to pull her back down, “hola, in case we haven’t met, I am Lucia. Lovely to be here, truly, I can think of no better way to spend my evening than listening to the bullshit we just heard.”

Her husband groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“One mistake!? He made one mistake?” Lucia directed her argument at Juan, “So he mistakenly slipped a drug in Rosalie’s drink, then he mistakenly left the party and waited for her to do the same, then he mistakenly dragged her into her parent’s barn, and mistakenly took her clothes off. Then by complete accident he had sex with her while she was unconscious. Is that what you’re suggesting?”

Juan tried to say something, but she barreled over him.

“And then! And then he mistakenly slipped the same drug into three other women's drinks over the course of a year. Not to mention how he mistakenly slipped something in Leandra’s drink, dragged her into an alley and mistakenly pinned her against a wall while he undid his belt. That’s your argument?”

Juan glared mulishly up at her, face red. Hopefully he was now aware of how ridiculous he’d sounded.

“He did not make a mistake. Cicero got told ‘no’ one time and went on a rampage. That’s deranged, and dangerous, and not the sort of behavior I want in my community. Not only do I vote to kick him out, if we had a giant catapult we could use I’d load him into it myself,” she finished with a nod, then walked away from her husband, sitting in another pew and crossing her arms.

Whispering started up, as far as Alma could tell, it was mostly about the state of Lucia’s marriage.

“Indeed, thank you Lucia,” Alma reclaimed the village’s attention, “who would like to-, sí Señora? What do you think?”

An elderly woman stood, leaning her weight on her cane.

“I think we are glossing over the most important issue, Cicero’s son. While the way little Julio was brought into this world is most unfortunate, Señorita Rosalie herself has said that he is just an innocent babe. He doesn’t deserve to be punished for the sins of his father, and quite frankly, every child needs their parents. Both parents,” the elderly woman said, apparently not feeling the need to introduce herself, “Cicero must face justice, but more importantly, the child needs a father. I feel we should find a solution that fulfills both requirements.”

A few people nodded as the woman eased herself back onto the pew, Alma opened her mouth to ask for who was next, but didn’t get the chance as Felípe shot to his feet, looking for all the world like he might punch an old lady.

“Julio is not without a father, I am his father, and quite frankly I don’t want somebody as vindictive as Cicero around my son,” Felípe all but shouted, “Rosalie turned Cicero down and he took it as an excuse not just to hurt her, but multiple innocent bystanders. And you want that guy to raise a child? You want to let him raise my child? Absolutely not!”

“He’s not your chil-.” The woman tried to say.

“Like hell he ain’t,” Felípe scoffed, “who do you think bought his crib?! His first blanket and clothes? Rosalie has barely felt safe being alone with me but that didn’t stop me from caring about her or our kid. After her parents kicked her out she needed help, so I did whatever I could. I’ve changed his diapers, I’ve bought any medicine Rosalie couldn’t afford, I’ve read and sang him to sleep. You want to tell me he’s not my son?! You want to give credit to Cicero?”

Felípe paused but the woman didn’t fill the silence.

“Cicero hasn’t done a damn thing to help Rosalie with her pregnancy or care for that boy. Oh sure! He offered! But only if Rosalie agreed to marry him, because she refused, he wiped his hands of the kid. Cicero may have sired the boy, but he ain’t the boy’s Pá, I am. And it will be a cold day in hell before I allow somebody that dangerous around my son.”

With his piece said, Felípe sat. Alma waited a beat to see if anyone else would shoot to their feet, then cleared her throat, “Anyone else?”

Señor Matisse raised his hand, then stood when she nodded, “Just to be clear, I will be voting to exile Cicero, but only because we don’t have a system in place to handle something like this. Juan raises a valid point, what Cicero has done is wrong, but I’m not convinced that exiling him is the best answer. And while Julio is not without a loving father, what if this happens again and the babe does not have a trustworthy backup waiting in the wings?”

Alma pursed her lips, the baker was raising some good points. 

“Cicero has proven he’ll commit the same crime again and again, no matter what sort of consequences his victims face, so exile may be our only option, but let’s not fool ourselves. By banishing Cicero from Encanto we are not stopping him from raping innocent women, we are just making sure he does it somewhere else,” Matisse paused sighing deeply, “maybe this isn’t the time to ask all these questions, but it bears thinking about, don’t it? Is banishing the guy really the best way to handle a violent crime?”

Out of the corner of her eye Alma saw a cloud form over Pepa’s head. Thankfully, Pepa stood and left the church before the cloud could turn into a full storm. Some people glanced at her, but the rain falling on her head was all the excuse she needed to leave.

“What? You think we should build a prison?” another man asked, scoffing a little, “Just for one guy?”

Matisse shrugged, “I don’t know. I don’t want that guy roaming free around my kids, but it just doesn’t sit right to kick him out, especially since he’ll likely do the same thing wherever he ends up.”

A few people mumbled, others nodded. Alma allowed the low hubbub to dominate the room for a few minutes, it was an important discussion and one she had been trying not to think about through this whole process.

She was very aware that banishing Cicero just meant sending him somewhere people didn’t know what danger he posed.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, there was nothing she could do about that, her duty was to Encanto. These people were trusting her and her familia to protect them, she had to put them first. When Alma opened her eyes, she lightly tapped the gavel on the table and the discussion died down. As usual, everybody turned to her with expectant eyes, so she steeled herself.

“You are right Señor, there is a very important conversation to be had about our justice system. However, for now we must work with what we’ve got. Is there anything else?”

A lot of hands went up, then out of the corner of her eye she saw Señor Gutierrez raise his hand, she turned to stare at him. The rest of the village followed her gaze, and slowly every other hand sank until Señor Gutierrez was the only person with their hand raised.

“Sí?” she asked.

He stood, and started with a deep sigh, “I-. I do not have a good argument to defend my son. I know what he’s done is… unforgivable.”

Gutierrez stopped talking, his head hanging low. The whole room held their breath, watching him, waiting.

The silence stretched uncomfortably long. If it weren’t for the fact that he were still standing, Alma would have tapped her gavel and asked who was next.

“Por favor, let mijo stay,” Gutierrez eventually breathed, “I know-. Let him stay, I will watch him, I won’t let him leave the winery, he’ll spend the rest of his life doing community service, just please. Don’t send my boy away.”

A tear, then another, escaped from his eyes. His voice creaked over every other word. His hands shook, his shoulders bowed, and he couldn’t meet anyone’s eyes.

He was begging.

Alma gulped, her voice came out gentler than she’d intended when she spoke, “You have known this entire time what he had done to Rosalie, you have known he tried again, and yet you didn’t stop him from drugging Señorita Lopez. Why should we trust you to keep him contained going forward?”

“Leandra baited him into-.”

“She handed him a drink while she went to the bathroom,” Alma cut him off, feeling so tired all of a sudden, “she didn’t make him drug her, she didn’t imply she would sleep with him then revoke the offer, she barely even flirted with him. She just handed him her drink, that was all it took. That was the entirety of the trap she set.”

Señor Gutierrez frowned, but she could see in his face that he knew she was right. Cicero didn’t need to be baited into attacking women, he just needed an opportunity.

In the back corner of the room, Agustín stood, “Disculpe, but… what guarantee can you give us that Cicero won’t sneak away and retaliate on Leandra, Félix, Rosalie, or even one of the Madrigals? Are you going to keep him locked inside?”

Señor Gutierrez’s mouth flapped for a second, he slowly shook his head, eyes wide and lifeless.

For a second, Alma wished she could show mercy if only for his sake. Señor Gutierrez had always been a good man, a loyal one. He was hardworking, kind, responsible, and most of all, a doting father and husband. He did not deserve any of this.

Sadly, however, he was choosing his son over the rest of the village. It was an understandable choice, one Alma might make herself if she couldn’t keep the village’s fear of Bruno from turning to resentment, but that changed nothing.

“Señor, Cicero is a danger to others. He has demonstrated a vindictiveness that almost ruined a young woman’s life, simply because she loved another,” Alma said, not without sympathy, “And now… well we have all seen how enraged he is by Leandra, and everybody else who helped to investigate him. If there were some other way to protect this village from him, I would be happy to discuss it, but… there isn’t.”

For a second the church was silent as they watched Señor Gutierrez crumble. Then, Julietta whispered to Agustín, quiet enough that you wouldn’t usually be able to hear it in the crowded church. But thanks to the silence, the whispered statement carried over the crowd, striking Señor Gutierrez across his face.

“If he really loves his son he’ll take him and run. From what Bruno said, Cicero will probably get murdered if he stays.”

Gutierrez turned and gaped at Julieta, who suddenly found herself to be the center of attention. For a split second she looked embarrassed, then she took a deep breath and stood.

“You heard Bruno’s prophecy, none of us are going to trust him after this. Those of you arguing on Cicero’s behalf? If your daughter or sister or wife comes to you and says she’s been raped and she doesn’t know who did it, who’s gonna be your number one suspect?”

Next to her, Félix started nodding, while others exchanged glances. Nobody disagreed with her.

“We’re sitting here debating whether or not we’ll be safe if he stays, but, well, maybe you should be asking yourself if he’ll be safe,” she continued, “I-I won’t heal him, not just because I hate him for what he tried to do to my sister, but because I don’t feel safe going anywhere near him.”

“We won’t sell to him, or you for that matter, we got cousins to worry about,” Félix said, after exchanging a glance with Felípe and their mother.

“Neither will I,” Señor Matisse admitted, “even if he stays, I won’t want him anywhere near my bakery. That’s where my kids are.”

“I won’t carry your wine if he stays,” Señora Moreno, the owner of Encanto’s finest restaurant said, almost apologetically, “I just-, I don’t think people will buy it after this. I’m already struggling to sell what we have.”

There were a few murmurs of agreement.

Señor Gutierrez sank to the pew, lips pursed and eyes a thousand yards away. 

Alma sighed through her nose, she looked around at the rest of the room, waiting for somebody else to put up their hand. Nobody did, most sat there looking contemplative. Whatever arguments people had been about to make before Señor Gutierrez and Julieta spoke, they were silent now.

Just in case, she asked, “Anyone else?”

The silence rang loud and clear.

“Very well, you have until tomorrow evening when the market closes to cast your vote. The ballot box will remain here in the church, as well as the ballots and some pens. Would anyone like to volunteer to guard the box from tampering? There will be six shifts, lasting four hours. I want two guards each, three alternates just in case, for a total of-. Felipe, thank you, but I would prefer if the volunteers were people who are less biased.”

Felipe slowly put his hand down, frowning, and Felix gently patted his back. Meanwhile, Alma chose fifteen volunteers and asked them to stand with her at the front of the church.

“Everybody else, you may go. We will count the votes tomorrow evening, and should have the results by the next afternoon,” Alma turned to look at Señor Gutierrez, “I will tell you and your family first, señor, then I will announce it to the rest of the village.”

Señor Gutierrez nodded stiffly, standing back up and shuffling out of the church. The village waited long enough to watch him go and gossip about how far he’d fallen, then slowly trickled out onto the streets. Alma wished she could hate him the way she hated his son, it would make watching his world fall to pieces so much easier to bear.

She shook her head and turned to her fifteen volunteers. Alma no longer had the luxury of wallowing in sympathy and sentiment. She needed to focus on making sure this vote went smoothly.

[thinkaboutmeff7au]

flash time 112

(1992.)

This church isn’t like the one back home, but it’s just as run-down. Mid-afternoon on a Thursday means there’s barely anyone here, but I can see a few people gathering in the pews. These doors are always open...something I found out when I had to drag Gen somewhere after his 3rd class celebratory bender.

There’s a confessional booth, but it doesn’t look like it’s being manned. I don’t care. I shut the door behind me and sit with a sigh.

“Sorry, I...” I start. “It’s okay. I don’t care if no one hears it, I just...”

I stare at the scuffed wood in front of me, wonder how many others have sat where I have. Confessed any amount of...well, anything.

I clear my throat again. “My best friend and I, we’ve been together like glue since we were in high school. We’ve been through a lot of sh--I mean, crap together...” Better not swear in front of the priest. Or God. Or whoever. “And like...he’s one of the only friends I’ve got.

“Now though...well, we’re both, er, we’re both in SOLDIER, and he’s got someone new he’s really...really fond of. It’s not like a girlfriend or something. He doesn’t date girls.” My heart stops. “F-forget I said that. He’s just eccentric. And there’s someone new in his life, and they spend all their time together now. They’re on missions together, they hang out together...”

I sigh. “I just wish we could hang out like we used to again.”

The truth is, I’m jealous. I know Gen was obsessed with me too, in a way that wasn’t healthy at all. Especially when he kept trying to make a move on me when I told him no. So him having someone else to put that...energy towards should be a good thing in theory.

But we’re still friends. He’s still my best friend. So why--

“Wow, that’s sad--”

“Ahh!” I yelp, jerking back and shaking the booth. It’s a young girl’s voice from the other side of the wooden mesh. What the hell?! Someone was actually listening?!

She pulls it open with her chin in both hands. “Sorry Mister SOLDIER, I didn’t mean to scare you,” she says.

She has bushy brown hair with huge green eyes. She can’t be more than...well, she’s probably older than she looks. At least in high school herself.

“Sure, well...” I didn’t really want to put a face to this, let alone some random girl... “I’m gonna get going then...”

“Hey, wait! Maybe I can help!” she says, waving one hand. “Like, uh...what did you guys used to do together in school? To hang out?”

“Well, we were in jazz band together...”

“Maybe you can start doing that again!” She becomes animated. “Ooh, what instrument do you play?”

I don’t think she’s trying to come onto me. It’s happened to me before--especially with teenage girls. No, I think she’s genuinely excited. “I play drums. My friend plays bass.”

“See! Easy. You just start a band!” She is quite proud of herself. “Problem solved!”

I can’t help but laugh...what a strange kid. Still, it isn’t a bad idea. Gen always talked about getting a band together. Didn’t he say Seph played guitar? Wonder if he would be willing...

That way the three of us could hang out, without it being a work thing. I’ll never forget our tour with the three of us...but who knows when that’ll happen again.

I turn toward her with a nod. “You know what? You might be right,” I say. “If anyone asks for me, I wasn’t here.”

“Sure thing! But I don’t even know your name.”

“All the better.”

I step out, stretching a bit--those booths are so cramped. They’re not made for Banora men. To my surprise, the girl comes out too, running over. She’s wearing overalls and a pink t-shirt, her transparent pink jelly sandals squeaking with every step.

“Hey, one more thing,” she says. “Do you know those guys in the suits?”

“You mean the Turks?”

“Yeah. There’s a guy with red hair I keep seeing hanging around. Can you tell him to leave me alone? I can take care of myself!”

Oh God, is this girl under Turk surveillance? I don’t need to get wrapped up in that. Time to go. I’m 99% sure she’s talking about Reno, though, so... “I’ll pass on the message,” I say.

(A.H.)

epilogue:

(1997.)

He’s eating today, so that’s good. Zack is still out of the loop, but Genesis is over every evening. I feel like I need to keep an eye on him for Zack’s sake...in exchange for keeping him in the dark.

“Hey, you know something,” Angeal says suddenly, his voice croaking. He clears his throat before he continues. “I just remembered...you and I had a run in before, a few years ago, before you and Zack got together.”

I blink. “Huh?”

“You were here at the church, and I was...” He smiles and shakes his head. “I was getting some shit off my chest about Gen. My mom had died, so I didn’t have anyone else to talk to about it. So I came here. And there you were.”

I roll through my memory. Here at the church...so it would’ve had to have been after Mom disappeared, after I was on the street...I snap my fingers. “Oh! Oh yeah! Mister SOLDIER!”

His smile is warm. “Thanks for that, by the way. Your little idea was pretty brilliant. It brought us together.”

“God, I barely remember that. I was going through a lot myself,” I reply. It was after I started living at the church, and only just getting used to three meals a day again.

“We all were,” he says. “Everyone is, all the time.”

His smile fades, and mine does too. Strange how these things work out.

(A.G.)

[stardust-in-my-mind-blog]

my first kiss

since I was a mean ol' twister today

my daughter and I decided to drive for a bit in the night

she picks the music and we sing together

tonight I was a little ranty and I try not to do that

but she giggled and told me she likes the drama

especially since she's not the one in trouble

she also mentioned something about not wanting to date

anyone until she's around fifteen and I smiled

and told her that as long as she was safe I'd listen

to what she wanted and if that's what she thinks

I'm not going to tell her she's wrong because I can't

she also said that she hates holding boys' hands

because they are always dirty and crusty and dusty

so I asked her if she wanted to hear about my first kiss

and she smiled and said yes and one thing about getting triggered

on three dimensions of emotion is that my memories are so clear

and this one was set in seventh grade and I was thirteen

there was a boy I had liked forever who flirted with me at the pool

ironically his name was chris reef and sometimes I just went

to church so that I could see him even though I told my parents

that it was all for my religion but church was actually quite boring

in the autumn of seventh grade we'd gone to a party after a game

and ended up waiting on the same bench for our parents to come

and I still remember the awkward conversation because I was

painfully awkward and shy back then which still shows up now

and he did this thing where he let his hand slowly crawl over mine

one finger at a time first over my knuckles and then took my palm

in his while we both stared intensely at the floor in front of us

we sat there in silence for ten minutes and I still remember

all the feelings I had when I stared at the ceiling in bed that night

it was the most romantic thing that had ever happened to me

and we never mentioned it or talked about it again

so come spring there was this church sleepover thing

and the two of us danced around things for quite awhile

I wonder if the awkward flirting was painful for people around us

but somehow he got me cornered in some dark corner somewhere

outside and I glanced up at the stars and thought of casper

because as a kid he'd always been one of my fictional crushes

and chris reef asked me if I'd ever been kissed before

he had freckles and really cute eyes and was totally a schemer

and he was weird like me so likely neurodivergent

and I remember being so excited and also overwhelmed by

all the daydreams and feelings a little girl has about being kissed

I told myself to close my eyes when he leaned in

and I remember his breath being less fragrant than one hopes for

but mine was likely the same so it was fair

I remember how weird his lips felt and how it was really

different than anything I'd read in my grandmother's collection

of absolutely smutty romance novels now that I think about it

and I remember feeling his lips part and his tongue lightly

touch one of my lips and I promptly put my hands

on his chest and pushed him bodily away and then ran

as fast as my little legs could go back into the building

and we never really talked about that ever again either

[ireceived-p8250000]

July 21-27, 2013

Sunday, July 21

Started my shift at 10, but first, I had breakfast at Hill Station Café and enjoyed my time there. Business was slow today. Justin came by the shop, and we talked about the reporting. I gave him the copies.

Monday, July 22

Had a long quiz for Chemistry.

In PE4 Volleyball, I teamed up with Hollmae, and I realized how much I suck at it.

During lectures, Mansoor and I sat at the front because of my myopia.

"Are you two a couple?" Ma'am Mylene asked.

We both shook our heads, but our blockmates insisted we were a pair. We denied it.

I started thinking about what it would be like if we became a couple. I had an agreement with Djang and the girls that I'd pay ₱700 if we became a couple within the year of the agreement, which expires next year on March 27.

I stayed in school for our org meetings. We have a seminar to attend on Saturday and discussed the shirts, which will be ready at the beginning of August. We also talked about volunteer activities and the soiree, which will be in the second trimester. Samuel and I discussed the reporting.

Later, I talked to Mansoor, but Hollmae came along, reminding me of our plan to go to the church thingy. I went with her, and Mansoor picked me up at 9.

"I was wondering, do you still want to be in a relationship?" I asked him.

He was quite shocked. "Oo, if it's okay."

"Yeah, me too. Pero ano--I had this stupid agreement with Djang and the girls. I would pay ₱700 if we became a couple within the year of agreement."

"Kailan expiration?"

"Next year, March 27 ata. We have to hide it till then."

"Hmm sige. Kaya pa itago yan. Let's just deny kasi you agreed eh."

"Eh, I didn't expect eh, I thought we will change our minds."

"So does this mean we are in cahoots in a romantic relationship?"

"In cahoots, really?"

"So ano?"

"Oo. We are officially entering a social contract. You will be my boyfriend, and I'll be your girlfriend."

"Let's shake on it?"

We shook hands and hugged.

"Should I kiss you?"

"Maybe not yet. Sa cheeks okay lang."

So that's it. I have a boyfriend now. We are in a secret relationship due to that stupid agreement.

We stayed in Starbucks for a long time.

"Ano terms of endearment natin?"

"Just our names. Baka ma-spill pa eh."

"Sabagay. What about the physical thing?"

"Buddy, we are not doing that yet."

"No, not that. Holding hands, kissing. Maybe in our own privacy we can hold hands. We can kiss but yeah we should be hiding like sa dark."

"It's like we're having an affair." He laughed.

"Wouldn't it be better that way? If everyone knows, God, they are going to expect a lot. They might even convince us to get married next year, who knows."

"I'd like that idea. But maybe we can tell some people who wouldn't know?"

"Let's just keep it between us. Kaya natin di ba?"

"Okay," he said.

We stayed for a couple more minutes, and he dropped me off.

Before I slept, he texted, "Good night, baby."

I'm so fluttered; my heart is full.

Tuesday, July 23

We don’t know how to act now that we are a couple in secret. I told Mansoor to act like nothing changed. We went to lunch together and had Dev Psych.

I stayed at school because my groupmates and I had to discuss our reporting for Friday before our midterms exams. Mansoor and I hung out for a bit, but I needed to finish up the presentation.

I went home and worked on the presentation and the activities we were supposed to do.

Before bed, I called Mansoor, and he read me a poem by an American poet I didn't recognize.

"Am I boring you?" he asked.

"Just continue," I replied.

Wednesday, July 24

I woke up refreshed but had to remind myself to stay focused. We had a quick meeting in the morning with my groupmates and rehearsed what we would do. I had to get them into it by showing leadership.

During his report, Mansoor kept looking my way. I mentally told him to stop, but he did it again. I covered my face.

I attended Fil3 classes, then went to Chemistry. Mansoor passed by the lab since he had English Lit across the hall. He bought me a pizza roll I liked during the break.

After that, I went to work. It was a quiet night, and Lloyd, who was reviewing for exams, covered for me while I checked on customers.

I went home and did my homework essay for tomorrow's Developmental Psych, including finding childhood photos to teenager.

I slept at 1 AM and responded to Mansoor's texts.

Thursday, July 25

We sat down before going to our Bio Psych classes. We wondered if anyone could notice but nobody did. We just talked as usual.

Mansoor mentioned they would have an outing on Sunday and asked if I would come since officers were welcome, but I refused because I'd rather earn money.

"Bakit kailangan mo mag-work pala? You don't seem to need money that much. Your parents pretty much pay for everything."

"I fantasize kasi myself to work in a bookstore while in university."

"So you enjoy it?"

"Oo."

He smiled warmly, despite his cold hands due to the rainy weather.

"Maybe Monday night we can watch Amelie?"

I asked, and he said there was no problem.

We showed each other our childhood albums, but I was shy about mine. Since everyone was doing it, I indulged. Mansoor was a beautiful boy.

I went to work and received a memo that Sunday would be closed for cleaning due to mosquitoes. It was paid, so I was happy.

Lloyd mentioned an older man had been looking for me, possibly the same man who flirted with me a few weeks ago. Lloyd didn't entertain him much, and I told him to keep it that way.

Friday, July 26

We started our reporting, and it went very well; it was interactive. My groupmates did a solid job.

Chemistry was getting tougher, especially handling inorganic substances.

After class, I went to work. My parents were back when I got home.

Saturday, July 27

Mansoor was absent today. Vivian was looking for him and asked me, but I shrugged. He had told me he wouldn't be around due to an org activity at BSU.

Djang showed photos of us together, saying we looked good together. She asked again if we were a couple, and I said maybe next year when the agreement expired.

"Okay lang, we can scrap that. Kinikilig kasi kami sa inyo," she laughed.

"Talaga?" I said, unable to contain my excitement.

"Oh, di kayo nga?"

"No," I shook my head. "Actually, we talked about the possibility."

"So... posible nga?"

"Mmmm..." I shook my head.

She asked if Mansoor was courting me. I said we talked about it but that I wasn't ready, and he agreed.

"Quiet ka lang, susungalin kita pag pinagsabi mo."

"Oo na," she said, flattered. But the girls had already heard.

I didn't see Mansoor all day. At work, the man Lloyd mentioned came by, checked out some books, and tried to get my number. I politely declined.

"Bakit ayaw? May nagbabawal ba?"

"Oo, ako. What kind of logic is that?"

"Oh, so why? Nakikipagkilala lang naman."

"Sir, you never asked for my age."

He fell silent.

"You're employed, so you must be ano, 18, 19?"

"Yes, and you are, 35--?"

"33 naman."

"Pick someone your own age."

His face went sour, and he warned me he'd talk to my boss because they were close. Good thing Lloyd was my witness.

I planned to resign.

We closed up shop, and I went home. I cried to my mom and dad about the guy harassing me. Dad was riled up and wanted to confront him, while Mom insisted I quit the job, concerned for my safety. I regretted telling them as it made them worry more.

I hadn't returned Mansoor's messages. I called him, and we talked until 2 AM. I think I dozed off.

[realityhelixcreates]

Boarded Up Paradise pt. 3

Compromise is difficult when you're talking to a demon.

Song: Number of the Beast-Iron Maiden

Warning: Nash is still underage and some sexual-ish things do happen in this fic. Certain non-consensual actions are implied here and there.

“~Are you hungry, Eddie~” Lust asked when he came home that evening. “~I've learned how to cook from several of my Hosts. Love's and Gluttony's too~”

“Love? Love exists? Like you do, I mean.”

“~Oh yes. And Justice, Faith, Fortitude, all of them and more~”

“And you're friends?”

“~Some of them, to various degrees. Love and I are close~”

“Really?” Nash asked, stowing his take of the cash in an abandoned picture frame. He would have enough to last a while, if he were frugal. “I thought you'd be enemies.”

The demon's expression became pitying. Normally, Nash would have hated that, but coming from a monster...it somehow felt more honest.

“~Oh dear little Eddie~” he said. “~Love and I are twins. We can exist, one without the other, but we are often found together, and have been from the beginning. No, Chastity is my opposite, and Temperance my enemy. Even so, we rarely fight directly. It's just not my style~”

“Oh. Uh, I guess I'm a little hungry. Not too much though. Do you eat? Human food, I mean?”

“~Certainly~” Lust said, hunting down a box of mac and cheese. There was a surprising amount of non-perishable food in the house, and Nash wasn't quite sure how it had gotten there. It wasn't as if Lust could go out shopping! Perhaps some of his previous meals had brought it with them. “~It is something that many people derive pleasure from. So I too, enjoy it~”

Was that how it worked? Everybody focused on the sexual aspect of lust as a concept, but if this being was somehow connected to every form of pleasure...Maybe he was a lot more multifaceted than Nash had initially thought.

“~Do you like anything in it~” Lust asked. “~One of my Hosts liked salsa in hers. How about you~”

“Plain.” Nash said. His mom had never put anything else in it, and it seemed like a waste since he was only going to eat a little bit. “How many Hosts have you had?”

“~Oh, many, many. From long ago until now. They are all my very dearest~”

“You care about them? I didn't know demons could care about people.”

“~Ah, and how much do you know about demons, little Eddie? I know there are people who study us extensively. Are you an occultist? Do they even teach that in your modern schools~” Lust scooped up a bowl of mac and cheese, setting it down in front of him.

“N-no. I guess not. I used to go to church, a long time ago. They just said demons were liars, tempters, and tricksters.” Nash took a small bite and remembered home. Those years when his mother cooked for him, and took him to Sunday school, where they told the gentler bible stories, filed the harsh edges off of war crimes and slavery, and skipped most mentions of the Devil and other demons. They spoke of love and forgiveness, but never of lust and wrath.

“~Oh, we are. But that's not all we are. How could something exist for so long, and never evolve? No, no, I care deeply about those I choose to. My proximity to Love does make it easier for me, and mostdemons do keep it secret, or show it in ways that are hard to recognize, but the possibility is alwaysthere~”

Lust sat across from him with his own food, somehow balancing his fork skillfully in his too-long fingers.

“So is that some kind of job you can have? An occultist? The study of demons?”

“~Among other things. I think it's more of a hobby now. I'm told it is more difficult to make money off of intellect unless you are in certain...oh, what did she call it? Plant? No, STEM studies~”

“Hmph, don't I know it.” Nash grumbled. “Who is 'she'?”

“~My last host~”

“Oh. What happened to her?”

Lusts intense gaze slipped from Nash and found the table.

“~A disease. It happened so quickly. I've lost many to sickness, but in this modern age...I thought perhaps that wouldn't happen anymore~”

“Oh...Geez, I'm sorry.” To see a demon mourn was so deeply strange. It was becoming easy to forget that Lust wasn't human, even as he sat across from Nash in a body made of smoke and lightning.

“~She is still with me, in a way. They all are. I mourn losing the ability to connect with them so intimately, but they will still always be with me~”

“That...sounds nice.” It kind of did. Never being abandoned, always having the care of something grand, and every lifetime or so, you got a new friend.

Lust smiled softly.

“~Many would disagree. But from those who get the chance to know, I've had few complaints~”

Nash went to bed having only eaten a few bites of his meal. He had other things to digest.

The librarian stared down at him, unimpressed.

“It's, uh, for a project.” he tried. “Um, for my history class.”

She looked back to the list he'd given her, full of occult books.

“We don't have any of these.” she said simply. “If we tried carrying these, I guarantee, we'd have parents calling us up all day and night, convinced we were running a satanic cult in tunnels under the school or something.”

At the mention of parents, her face softened, and Nash took advantage of it immediately, letting himself droop in disappointment.

“I just wanted to get a good grade.” he said sadly. “And I think about the...like, the nature of the afterlife a lot nowadays, you know?”

She wore her thoughts like a billboard across her eyes. Poor kid's lost everything. He knew the librarian didn't like him; he asked too many questions, made too much work for her. She might have even gotten in trouble a few times when he'd been caught hiding away in the library after school hours too often. But she had the weakness of pity sewn into her, and he would use it, and she would let him.

“But...if you fill out this form, I might be able to get them in through an interlibrary loan.” she suggested, sliding a paper over the counter at him. “I can't promise all of them, but I might find a few.”

“Any would be great.” Nash said, quickly filling out the form. He'd have to get back to class soon, and after that, well he knew how to pirate PDFs. It would be a poor excuse for a Riddler who didn't have multiple ways of gathering information.

He came 'home' to find Narci pinned against the living room wall.

His closest brother strained against the ephemeral power of many inky tentacles, grimacing as Lust whispered almost silently in his ear. Sweat gathered on his forehead, red spreading across his pale face. Nash heard him whimper.

“Lust!” Nash shouted. “That's my brother, let go of him!”

He rushed at the demon, grasping at the insubstantial tendrils. Startled, Lust convulsed, the mass of shadow retreating from Narci's trembling body. The other boy collapsed.

Nash shoved past him to reach Narci.

“Are you okay?” he cried. “Tell me you're okay!”

Narci, on his hands and knees, shook his head. Not okay.

“~I have not harmed him~” Lust said. “~You know him? I thought he was simply following my lure~”

“No, he was following me!” Nash said. “He always finds me. It's okay Narci.”

“~Hmm. His desires are so mundane. Do not let the false shame of this world deter you, young man. It's perfectly normal to want-”

Narci shrieked, his high voice shrill as a hawk, and he leapt at Lust, driving his knife into the demons chest.

Nash shouted. Lust glanced down at the blade embedded in his swirling clouds, then back at Narci.

“~Well~” he said, showing long, hidden fangs. “~It was a spirited try~”

Lust flung Narci back as if he weighed nothing, denting the drywall. Narci toppled, yanked himself back to his feet and lunged again.

“Nash run!” he screamed. “I'll hold it off!”

Lust filled the room, his body dissolving away into thick shadows that swallowed them both.

Whispers slid Nash's mind, promises of pleasure, of freedom, of the safety to indulge in the most secret, most obscene, most treasured desires. It drew out his curiosity about what was possible, what was allowed, what it was that he really wanted, and the answers that began to form troubled him.

Somewhere in the dark Narci howled denial.

“Lust, please!” Nash cried. “You're hurting us!”

The shadows retreated, taking the whispers with him, leaving both boys shaking and exposed in the watery gloaming from the edges of the boarded up windows.

Nash crawled to Narci, who was curled up and crying.

“~Did that hurt~” Lust asked, confused. “~It was not meant to cause any physical damage~”

“It was frightening.” Nash said. “Please don't do that.”

Lust hesitated.

“~I promised no safety to him~” he protested.

“He's my brother. Leave him alone.” Nash grabbed his phone. “Do you want me to call somebody else?”

He'd burn another bridge for Narci's sake. Without hesitation.

Narci shoved him away. His eyes frightened Nash, but all he did was run. Lust let him pass, Nash wincing at the sound of the backdoor slamming.

“Now see what you did?” Nash accused.

“~What I did~” Lust exclaimed. “~He came into my home, attacked me, and ran~”

“Don't you try that!” Nash shouted. “You hurt him! He was crying! You can't just eat my friends! Even Mons doesn't do that!”

“~This new strain of insolence is not endearing on you, little Eddie~” Lust grumbled darkly. “~His personal issues are not my fault. However...if it truly means so much to you...Perhaps I can simply ask first~”

Nash frowned, crossing his arms.

“~Ohhh, you think you have control here? I have made concessions for you, but I am the anthropomorphized portion of a deity in this room, so perhaps you should rethink your attitude~”

That phrase, the accusation of 'attitude' so often thrown at him right before something horrible happened, ripped through him and poured adrenaline into his blood. Legs tensed, ready to dash away like he always tried to do, ready to hide, ready to-

-explode into anger like never before. His father was dead, and no one else would ever be allowed to treat him like that!

Nash snatched a forgotten glass off a dusty coffee table and threw it at the demon.

“Shut up!” he shouted. “You don't tell me what to do! You don't talk to me like that! You're not my father, you're not anything! You think you're so tough, then why are you starving in a brokeass old house by yourself? Huh? Why you so small and weak? Why you gotta suck off of humans like a parasite? You ain't a god, you're a leech!”

Lust rushed him, fangs bright as lightning in the dimness, right up on him, tendrils pointed and poised to strike-

And stopped, centimeters from Nash's face.

Nash had screamed, expecting dozens of stabbing wounds, but...nothing. He snapped his mouth shut. Lust didn't look angry, he looked...pained? The fangs were gone, the tendrils softened, carefully caressing him, instead of rending his flesh.

“~Ohhh no, no~” Lust moaned softly. “~No, I won't hurt you. Never you. Dear little Eddie, I gave my word. And my word has power, that even I cannot break. I'm so sorry to have frightened you. I will ignore your friends. My hunger is making me impolite, but I will simply go hungry tonight~”

The back door slammed back open, and both Nash and Lust froze.

“Who's in here?” someone demanded, loud and aggressive. “This is the police!”

“~Or perhaps not~” Lust whispered.

This time Nash stayed to watch.

[bike42]

Saturday September 16, 2023

Another sunny day - we’re sure blessed with good weather so far on this trip. I’d booked an all day “Outlander” tour through Viator, and our driver, Jim picked us up at our cottage at 9am for our private tour.

He was quite chatty, and had a large new van. We sat up front with him so we could get better views. It took us awhile to understand that this wasn’t strictly an “Outlander” tour … in fact, Jim knew little about the Outlander series only having watched one episode in his life. That was probably even better though and we just relaxed into historical and beautiful sites surrounding Inverness, which was wonderful on such a beautiful day.

We started with a beautiful drive to the little spa village of Strathpeffer - kind of dated now, but you can see that it was once a fantastic destination. From there, we drove down a little lane where we got a glimpse of the beautiful Castle Leod, which had been owned by Clan McKenzie. We got to talking about whisky, and Jim decided we should do a tasting, but first we detoured to Robertsons Farm, where they have animals on display that they’ve adopted - two Hairy Cows, three alpacas and three very fat goats! We bought a few things from their shop and had a good chat with owner, Karen.

Then we were on to Singleton distillery. We skipped the distillery tour and went right on to the tasting. At this location, Muir Of Ord, they distill and bottle only for consumption here in Scotland and for export to Japan. They have another location, “Singleton of Glendullan” that exports to the US so we’ll have to look for that. We each had a flight of the 12 year old whisky, and it was fantastic. Their tasting technique was a bit different than what we’d learned from Eugene a few nights ago - they encouraged smelling it, and adding two drops of water.

Our next stop was in Beauly, the home of the real Jamie Fraser (many by that name actually, from the Fraser’s of Lovat). We toured the ruins of a Priory from the 1500’s. It was in amazingly fantastic shape, missing the roof which was taken off to put on another church in the 1800’s! Amazing tomb markers there, all very old and you could just make out the writing. My favorite had Gaelic writing and symbols, with moss growing in the etched out areas.

Next we drove along Loch Ness - with two stops to get out and take in the view. Then back through the city of Inverness and to the Culloden battlefield. Quite honestly, my first knowledge of this battle came from the Outlander series, but I have read more about it and the Jacobite Rising since then. On April 16, 1746, nearly 2000 Jacobites were killed here in a battle that lasted only an hour. I found it odd that the other side was labeled as “government,” but I guess they were the British soldiers! The lost only 300 in the lopsided battle. In the aftermath, much of what made the Highlands unique was outlawed: Clans and their tartans, bagpipes, many supporters lost their land.

From there, we drove to Balnuaran of Clava - a Stone Age memorial site not unlike the tombs we’ve seen in Ireland. This was also the site of the “standing stones” that play a big part in the Outlander series, but the setting is very different than that shown in the series. I didn’t feel any major powers at the stones, and I’m ok with that!

It was late in the day, but we stopped by Fort George on our way back to the city. It would have been interesting to go in if we’d had more time, and also there was a Highlander Games taking part inside which would have been fun to see.

Jim dropped us off and we chilled at the cottage before walking to the main drag for an early meal of tapas at a cocktail bar. A very young and rowdy crowd out on this Saturday night! Back to the cottage for some cribbage and to watch Ireland win another rugby match in the World Cup contest (it’s starting to make more sense to us now)!

[apexart-journal]

Caitlin Hespe in NYC Day 2

Met Ariel at the apartment, then we walked and talked the way to church st to meet Steven. Had lunch and was given a good run-down on why the fellowship exists.

Still feeling overwhelmed that it is me here, receiving this.

Trying to ride it.

Wandered the way to therapy, sat by the hudson river for a few minutes.

Wandered again in the way one can when they don’t have clear aims (except for a location to be in two hours). I think this is how I like to explore, letting the sight of things surprise me, potentially missing the ‘thing’ I should be seeing, but enjoying what I do see, I guess.

Thinking a lot about the nature of reflection, and documentation. Still struggling to get my head around the directive not to draw, not to engage in my medium, not to make art.

Not that I see myself as someone who MUST make art all the time, compulsively, ( i envy that stereotype), but that I honestly see the impulse to make as something special, and not something to deny when it comes. Maybe my struggle with this concept for me here is that I have been a bit starved of time and energy (from work) to feel the inclination to create/make, and have been trying not to feel down about it, but really craving it. Being in a new place is often so triggering to the desire to make something (or record something), that I feel strange about the suggestion to resist.

I guess I was thinking about what it is that distinguishes ones practice, ones medium. I think for some, the answer is quite clear. For me I am deeply uncertain about what it even is to make art, what to call art, when one becomes an artist… I do not have a practice that can be described easily in terms of medium. I don’t even really know what I am talking about when someone asks me about my practice. Lately I have been so lethargic outside of work, I don’t even think I have been ‘practicing’.

But I know that I enjoy reflecting on things that I see and notice ( I guess this is existing), and it is those methods that I consider integral to whatever my practice is. But, I really really don’t want to resist taking photos here. I don’t want to resist the urge to sit and watch a place and write down thoughts.

I think I can come around to the concept of resisting enough to ask myself why I am wanting to record something, in the moment. To reflect before.

But, I don’t think I can resist an inclination completely, just because it is a ‘rule’. I get the feeling that this fellowship is about breaking the concept of having too many expectations on artists to move around and ‘produce’ and to submit to others expectations on their creative outcomes. Therefore I think that if I were to submit completely without reflection and critique to the directive not to engage in my practice, then I would be doing something very similar to these other models.

Just thoughts.. Still forming.

Made my way to the open mic night at the Actors Theatre Workshop, on West 28th.

We waited for a while before the host reluctantly told us we were just five, all not wanting to perform. At this point I was feeling quite tired and definitely wanting to lie down, not talk much. But the night had other plans, as they do, and we all ended up have a chance to stand in front of each other on the stage and say something, anything. The host became very honest and open, speaking what was on her heart/mind, and it was beautiful. She called me up, and I decided not to hide. I stood there and talked for a few minutes, stream of consciousness really, something about the plane ride, and the toilets not working, and the work of the workers, or something. It felt incredibly clunky and waffly and ended abruptly. I sat down and watched the others similarly, reluctantly oblige the evening. We all survived, it was quite pleasant really. One of the others and I connected and went for a drink afterwards. He suggested that there was a theme of gratitude in my story. I agreed. We talked about what brought us here, (he is new here, from california). It was nice to have gone through that experience without judgement. I think I came away from it seeing the beauty in opening up in front of people, not expecting a ‘perfect’ performance. But also, the beauty of stories, and the art of telling them. I wonder what stories I already have that could be gleaned, reflected on. I’m sure there will be more after this.

[secretsandwriting]

Mate [Aether]

Ghouls biology is different from humans in many ways. One of those many ways is they need a mate and if they don't find one in a certain timeframe, instincts take over and they get one. It would however be nice if said mate got a little more warning.

Where the ghouls haven't gotten a mate in time so instincts take over and the first person they see becomes their mate.

[Dew] [Mountain] [Rain] [Swiss] [Poly]

            “Does anyone know what the meeting is about?” The sister next to you asked. Silence filled your little group. “So we’re headed to a very important meeting with everyone in the ministry and none of us know what we’re walking into? Lovely.”

            “Well, hopefully we’re not being sanctified or something.” The sister leading the group snorted. “What? We are in a satanic church.” The atmosphere lightened up and you joked around with the sisters.

Once in the meeting room, you noticed all the Higher ups in front talking amongst each other, the ghouls were towards the side, and the rest of the siblings of sin were in the seats along the floor. You made your way to some empty chairs and sat down next to one of the older sisters you had seen in the library multiple times. She offered you a smile before making sure there was enough room for you to sit comfortably. 

            You hadn’t been seated for a minute when you felt like someone was watching you, which would make sense if someone was, everyone was gathered in one area. But it was persistent and it made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up which was unusual.

            Sister Imperator had just gotten to the podium to speak when one of the ghouls stood up. She sighed and watched with the rest of the ministry as he walked through the isles, the sisters gawked at him as he walked past them. You had glanced at him as he walked through the crowds a little bit but it was only when he got closer you realized he was the one staring at you. 

            He stopped in front of you making it so you moved further back in his seat to make room for him to stand there. The chairs were still close enough together that your knees were pushing into his legs. He stood there just staring at you for a moment, the room dead silent.

            “Aether, please hurry. We’re holding the sisters from their duties.” Sister Imperator broke the silence and pushed Aether into motion. Within seconds you found yourself in the air, your only support being his arm under your legs and around your waist as well as his chest against your side. In a moment of panic you wrapped your arms around his neck and quite literally clung to the ghoul. Terrified of being dropped onto the hard stone floor. 

You were carried to where the ghouls as well as a few sisters sat where Aether sat down and adjusted you in his lap so you were somewhat comfortable. The sister sitting in the lap of the ghoul next to you offered an encouraging smile.

            “Let’s begin. Now I’m sure you’re all confused as to why some of the ghouls have been grabbing some of the sisters. It’s simple. Ghouls need mates, and if they don’t find one in time they’re instincts take over and they choose the first person they see.” 

            “There are still three of the ghouls who haven’t gone through this yet so in case that happens to you we’re going to go over the basics so you have an idea of what to do. If they try to take you somewhere, go with them, they won’t let anything harm you so don’t worry.” 

            “Talk with your dorm head and start moving out. They’ll need you close so you’ll be moving to their room, tell the head sister you won’t be under her care anymore. The ghouls need you close therefore you’ll be trained in something for the Ghost Project so you’ll be needed on tour.” 

            “And for the love of all things unholy if you see a sister who has a ghoul trailing close behind them, tread carefully. You will not be spared any mercy if they think you’re going to harm their mate and I’m sure none of the others want to clean up what's left of you from the stone.” 

            “That is all, you may go back to your chores and arrange for the changes.” She glanced at you for the last part. Aether who had been chill, just holding you with his chin on your shoulder growled in her direction. The sisters around you slipped off their ghouls laps and loosely surrounded you, you could feel Aether stiffen and tighten his grip a fraction.

            “If you want, we would be more than happy to give you a little more detailed explanations and help with the transition.” Who knew one sentence could bring so much relief with it.

            The rest of the day was a complete whirlwind of a day, finding and informing all your superiors, packing, meeting with Sister Imperator and Papa IV or as he insisted Copia, and unpacking. On top of all of it, you had a ghoul who made the most dejected sounds you had ever heard anytime he wasn’t touching you. 

            So when you were finally able to go to bed, you let Aether put you wherever he wanted as long as you were comfortable. Which led to you laying on top of him with your head tucked into his neck and the softest blanket you had ever felt thrown over you. The purring was relaxing and lulled you right to sleep.

            The next week didn’t slow down. You had to adjust to Aether constantly with you, start learning art and graphic design, make sure you made it to practice so Aether would go, adjust to a completely new schedule, and have tea with the sisters.

            Tea was the only time you didn’t have Aether clinging to you. In the Ghoul’s wing there was a room set aside only for mates, it was essentially a no ghoul zone. Designed for when you might need a break. Tea was also when you were able to get more tips or talk with people who understood what was going on so you never missed tea. 

            Once you settled in and Aether was able to leave you for longer and could stand people being around you, you were given an office and a team to lead. Sister Imperator had even called you into her office to tell you what a good job she thought you were doing. Aether wouldn’t let you go there without him though.

            You were informed Aether was one of the touchier ghouls and you agreed, despite the fact he was at the point where instincts were only really higher than normal when it to people being around you, he still held your hand, gave you hugs, pulled you onto his lap, and wrapped his tail around any part of your body he could whenever possible. 

            Aether was notoriously good at sneaking up on you just to leave a kiss on whatever skin was available at the moment, you figured out his favorite time was when it was around the sisters not used to ghouls so he could hear their shrieks when he just suddenly appeared as well as making the point you were his mate.

            Two months later you left to join the ghouls on tour. It was the first tour any of the mates had been on so none of you had any idea of what was happening. Four days before the first show Copia pulled all of you to the side and revealed some masks and costumes made for all of you. They were rather simple but would hide your identity.

            “Just because the rituals are longer and there's lots of stress, I had these made. If you hear me calling you, please come out and help.” After that the costumes were tailored to you and the ghouls tried to convince all of you to just stay on stage with them the whole time.

            The first five rituals went ok, the sixth one the ghouls were clearly getting antsy, the audience could see how they kept glancing to the side. Copia could see that they were actually looking for all of you. One of the sisters had made the comment that one of the people from the venue made them nervous, that something about them set off red flags. After that, they kept looking to make sure you were ok. The people were left in the dark with the ghouls just thinking it was people in a mask pretending to be some sort of demon, and how Copia went about this would be important. 

            “I’m sure you’ve all noticed the ghouls are acting a little strange, yes?” The audience's agreement was deafening. “So I’m going to have their mates come out.” It was terrifying walking out in front of so many people, so you focused on Aether. 

            He moved his guitar so he could wrap his arms around you. Aether just stood there, breathing your scent in and soaking up your presence.

            “As you can see, they’re all adorable together.” Copia’s voice rang out, breaking you out of your thoughts. Aether let out a whine when you pulled away, trying to chase you to pull you into another hug but you stepped back and cupped the sides of his mask.

            “Aether, I’m ok. If someone tries to bother me I’ll come get you. Ok? But until then, I need you to play like normal.” You pressed a gentle kiss to his lips before stepping back. “Make sure you play well for me.” The rest of the show went by faster, the ghouls were fired up more than normal and everyone could see it. Clips from when you were talking to the ghouls went viral and all of you ended up named. 

            The ghouls were pleased when the crowd started demanding to see you come out because then they could show you off. You had caught Aether scrolling through your ship name on social media and had heard the others doing the same. So when the people started asking to get your signatures on albums too, it left the clergy racing to make custom stamps for you. 

            When your first signing came, Aether refused to let you sit in a chair. Every time you tried he would switch to that chair and settle you in his lap, so you finally just gave up and let him hold you throughout the entire thing.

            That night exhaustion hit you like a truck, Curled up on top of Aether you whispered “love you” before passing out. Aether couldn’t sleep for a few hours after that, too caught up on the two words he had been waiting to hear for months.

Check out my ao3!

[promptthebear]

Kissmas Day 3

Prompt: Sneaking away to a hidden corner to share a secretive kiss

Pairing: Edmund Pevensie x Reader

A/N: Sort of a sequel (spin off?) of Day 2 if you squint, but you can read either or without context. Enjoy!

“Why don’t we get out of here?”

You stole a furtive glance over your shoulder before looking back at the young man standing in front of you. His hand, clad in a white glove, was extended palm up, waiting for you to take it.

And so you did.

The corridor was dim, and almost eerily quiet after the colour and noise of the ballroom. You followed your companion, Edmund, he said his name was Edmund, past marble pillars and candelabras that stood like glowing sentinels between them. Neither of you said a word, it was only the soft rustling of your skirts and the muted tap of his boots that broke the silence. Not once did he let go of your hand.

Eventually, your journey brought you to a small nook in the corridor that had been carefully disguised from view with a potted lily. It was set at just the right angle that someone, or perhaps even a pair of someones, could slip into the alcove without difficulty and yet still be completely hidden in the plant’s lush foliage from passersby. The light from the candles lining the hall only just kissed the walls of the opening, making for a pleasant but not overwhelming golden glow within.

When you saw the settee that had also been tucked into this hideaway, you turned to Edmund and arched a brow.

“Have you done this before?”

Edmund at least had the sense to look a little sheepish.

“No.” he said, nervously rubbing at the back of his neck with his free hand “But lots of people know about it. I just never…had anyone I wanted to share it with.”

Satisfied, you gently took your hand from Edmund’s grip and sat, taking a moment to adjust your skirts before you patted the open space next to you. His added weight caused the cushion to dip, pushing your bodies a little closer than you normally would’ve liked. You were grateful for the mask you wore, hoping that and the dim lighting would hide the blush you could feel spreading across your cheeks.

“Are you enjoying the party?”

You turned your head slightly, trying to see Edmund’s eyes. The new angle made it difficult, he was quite a bit taller than you and this meant you were forced to look at his jaw while you spoke.

“Yes. How about you?”

Edmund shrugged. The snugness of the space meant every little movement made much more of an impact. You felt his shoulder brush yours, muscled where yours was soft.

“S’alright. Wish everyone wasn’t so hard up for Peter though. He’s not all that special, even if it is his birthday.”

You muffled a laugh behind your hand.

“That kind of talk could get you hung for treason, you know.”

It was Edmund’s turn to laugh. You quite liked the sound, warm and rolling like church bells.

“He’s my brother. If he tries to hang me, I’d knock him on his arse first.”

“Do you like being a prince?”

That seemed to surprise him, you could tell by the way his eyes widened behind his mask. It was a funny expression on a fox, certainly not sly and knowing like you’d expect one to be.

“I suppose? Living in a castle is nice enough, and I actually don’t mind doing council meetings even if Peter hates them. It’s only just…”

“What?”

The question hung between you two like a wisp of smoke, growing and billowing the longer it sat. Edmund took a deep breath, you felt his stomach graze your elbow as he inhaled.

“I just wish everyone wasn’t watching all the time, you know? Sometimes I really miss being able to go off and do ordinary things, and be an ordinary man instead of having everyone expect me to act like I’m royal. I wasn’t always, why should wearing a crown change any of that?”

You remembered how it felt, the eyes on you when he’d asked you to dance. A chill went down your spine and you gave an involuntary shiver. Edmund reached out and stroked your arm with the backs of his fingers, concerned.

“Is that why you brought me here? To get away from being watched?” you asked, your voice little more than a whisper.

“Well, yes. That, and one other reason.”

When his mouth caught yours, it was tentative and quick, as though Edmund wasn’t all that used to doing a lot of kissing despite being one and twenty. You leaned against him, pressing your body and your lips closer to try and encourage him. He seemed to get the hint, reaching up to cradle the back of your head with one hand and bringing the other around your waist.

It was over much too quickly, and when Edmund drew back you followed, shortening the little distance there was between you as you entangled your fingers in his shirtfront.

“We should be going back. Your sister is probably looking for you.”

“Not just yet.”

Edmund was about to protest, though any further attempts were quickly silenced as you kissed him again.

If anyone was looking for the Crown Prince of Narnia and a visiting Lady from Ettismoor that night, they would’ve been hard pressed to find either. When morning came and the celebration broke up, your families would still be warring and Edmund would most likely have to go off and be princely. But for now, there was no one in the alcove except a very ordinary boy kissing a pretty girl he’d met at his brother’s birthday party, enjoying what precious little time they had.

.