#then they leave saturday morning đđđ
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puppies leave on saturday and i have a 13 hr work day tomorrow :(
#text#back to school night is the worst#i could get out of it if i just told admin that pi is sick (heâs had diarrhea)#butâŠi know in my heart he is fine đ#and i really do want to meet all the parents#i have been studying everyoneâs names really hard đ€ Iâm confident i know who everyone is and a little bit about them#friday is a minimum day at least#Iâm gonna go home and take them to bass pro shop#then they leave saturday morning đđđ
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i WAS gonna complain about horror being a skeleton and therefore never able to do the akanbe face but then i remembered. i'm an artist!! i can just DRAW him doing it đđđ ok but he doesn't have eyelids iKNOW ill figure it out ok
#im going on a short vacation that means prime time to slack off and mtthink#and i have some drawing ideas froM LIKE TWO WEEKS AGO that i never drew because i had no motivation or even time#so now i can do it :3333 lets (me) see if i still even like the ideas#and i have Saturday and sunday and mondayOFFschool and then i leave on wednesday morning ăœ(â§ââŠ)ïŸ#and that gives me prime time to draw draw DRAW#and theres like 20 days left of October i really should get to work on that animation meme#i WILL trust i swear#if not i kill myself#jk! (fashion au?)#ive been using kaomojis now. jk killer would too#ăœ(â§ââŠ)ïŸ#me taking like a whole week on a shitty hrkl little writing thing when it was leagues easier to just describe my idea#i REALLY had a vision and then i was reminded that writing is boring and that a vision expressed through words cant keep my attention#anyways i finished another little dust doodle of a song that reminded me of him#now it is time to actually get my life together and shower and brush teeth#the only homework ive got is reading a few pages#i have been ON TOP OF MY HOMEWORK since school started brođđđđ ive been SUCH a good student đđđđ#so much free time at home and yet none of it is spent on doing anything but laying down and lazing about#come on! come on! you need to get up! use your brain! PLEASE TRIGLYVERUVLE PLEASE FOR YOUR OWN ENTERTSINMENT#forcing myself to do something i find fun when i have no motivation to get up is so annoying#iWANT to draw iWANT to think i WANT to write (eh) but i just nonono feel like it (àŒàș¶ à·Ž àŒàș¶)#tricule rant#actually today i found another song that could fit horror but i just glanced at the lyrics#if i aint mtt pondering at the very least ill be connecting them to songs#new art project is gonna have HINTS of mtt in it. not really but if im aware of them then they exist#i love art class i love learning about art principles i just wish i could apply that shit to my work#well DIGITAL work. doing stuff traditionally always feels so much easier
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ough why did my iv drip hurt so much đ i had preseptal cellulitis as a kid and they gave me iv antibiotics so it'd be a quicker recovery and the cannula was in my hand and apparently its not supposed to hurt but every 4? 6? hours when they switched the drip on i just remember it hurting so much i cried. makes me squeamish even now
#chaos.txt#that hospital trip was so crazy i remember it in such vivid detail and i was like. 8#my eye hurt thursday evening my dad said there was no point going to a&e we'd rather wait till morning#in the morning it was all puffed up and crunchy and we went to the hospital :-) and my dad took me to eye casualty#and we sat for a few hours i remember the waiting room and everything. eventually got seen sent up to this empty ward#literally 10 beds and just me. my mum bought grapes. they put in the cannula#they tried to distract me but i rly didn't want it lol so i was squirming so i always think maybe i just made them do it wrong?#my mum had to leave the room because she's squeamish đ hurt like hell#then i fainted a while after. definitely related my body doesn't like needles#got moved to this other ward much busier and then honestly i don't remember#i know that i went to the kids play area on saturday and got disappointed because they only did workshops on weekdays#and my mum met a woman whose older kid had been there for a while and i was jealous of his walking IV#and in the night this girl was brought in next to me with a bunch of red angry spots#and my hand burned when they switched the IV on so my dad held my hand :-)#and there was a boy with a broken leg the next ward over and i was so fascinated by the sling#and when they took the cannula out it didn't hurt at All but i was like oh there's blood there ! so i started cleaning it up#and the nurse said oh you'd make a great nurse one day :) and i think one of my parents said or a doctor!#and . well. here we are. god 10 years later. what a wild ride
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đ„čđ I just saw an edit of the clip, you know which one I'm talking about, where army sing back don't leave me to the boys and I just let it play on loop whilst I cried for 15 minutes đđđđ
#i dont know why im so emotional today of all days im meant to be happy and proud but i just cry everytime i think about it#bts#im gonna miss them so much man đđđđđ#from what we've heard taehyung and namjoon are leaving on the 11th đ and jungkook and jimin on the 12th đđđđđđđ#im not ready#đđ#sorry for being emotional and sad on a saturday morning guys on the odd chance anyone sees this i took a minute between writing this post#and writing these tags just to breathe#and i watched crazy form live by my atz boys and that cheered me up theyre my medicine đ„čâ€ïž im feeling better now#it just hurts you know đ„č#kim taehyung#kim namjoon#jeon jungkook#park jimin#Spotify
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so Iâm back home and Iâve got about 4 days until I go to uni
#Iâm kind of sad Iâm back home since I had a great time in Tenerife#the food was AMAZING đ„°#but anyways#Iâve got 3 shifts left#ive got a morning shift#opening shift and then an evening shift#so pretty nice and easy#my last shift is on the thursday this week#Iâm not like leaving - Iâm transferring#but if all goes well I wonât start working at my new place until like October ish#but this whole transferring process has been a nightmare#I could probably write a seperate post about it đđ#so on the agenda aside from work I need to get my uni stuff sorted#like I think Iâve bought everything I need itâs just sorting#I also need to tidy my room and pack the stuff Iâm going to take with me#my move in process should be quite smooth since majority of people moved in yesterday#so I donât think there will be loads of people moving in on the Saturday#my accom has a groupchat which is really nice#I was super jealous because there were a ton of free snacks yesterday and I love a good freebie :(#Iâm also in another groupchat for people in my accom that go to the same uni as me#so basically with the accommodation Iâve got it has students from different unis#so that will also be an exciting experience I think#but everyone on the groupchat seems really sweet and nice#I think thereâs a meet up we are planning this Sunday so I canât wait to meet everyone#gatherrambles#thegapyeardiaries#g/theunidiaries#<- :D
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Hello!! If youâre still taking requests Iâd love to see a Nanami x Reader fic where the reader is pregnant but doesnât realize yet but Iâd like showing OBVIOUS symptoms and for Nanami to start to catch on to them, I donât know if thatâs like weird? đ Also I hope youâre doing good!!
THIS. IS. EVERYTHING.
Yeah, we're doing this right now
Nanami realizing you're pregnant before you do
Pairing: Nanami x fem!reader
Word Count: 2,2k
Synopsis: well, basically the request above hehe
Warnings: I mean, reader is pregnant lol, fluff fluff fluff, Nanami is just the greenest flag I can't, please tell me you enjoy this as much as I do, I LOVE THAT MAN
Lately, everything feels⊠off.
It's subtle at first. Mornings are harder than they used to be, a strange kind of sluggishness that lingers in your limbs no matter how much coffee you drink after waking up. Your back aches at the most random times. And don't even get started on the nausea that strikes out of nowhere, leaving you clutching the bathroom sink with trembling hands.
But, still, it doesnât cross your mind - not at first.
Nanamiâs been noticing though. Heâs always been perceptive, sharp in the way he observes the world, but lately, his focus seems to rest more on you. It starts with the small things: a subtle glance as you push your breakfast away with a grimace, the way his brow furrows when you wince, pressing a hand to your lower back. He doesnât ask you about it immediately, and youâre grateful for that. Nanami doesnât rush things, never has. He knows you well enough to wait until the right moment.
Today, however, something is different.
Itâs a quiet Saturday morning. Youâre both in the kitchen, sunlight streaming through the curtains in soft beams. Nanamiâs making coffee, his movements precise as always, while you sit at the kitchen table with your hands wrapped around a cup of ginger tea. Youâve been craving that instead of coffee these days, the rich scent of the brew turning your stomach in a way it never used to. To be honest, youâve never been a tea drinker your whole life.
Heâs noticed that too.
You yawn, stifling the sound behind your hand as you stretch in your chair. Thereâs a strange heaviness in your body, and the thought of going back to bed, even after a full nightâs sleep, is oddly tempting. Itâs the third time this week that the idea of a nap has crossed your mind before noon. You blink hard, forcing your eyes to focus, and turn to Nanami, whoâs watching you over the rim of his cup.
âAre you feeling alright?â he questions, his tone neutral but his eyes searching.
âYeah, why?â you respond, but your voice lacks its usual energy.
Even to your own ears, it sounds tired. You clear your throat and offer a small smile, hoping to brush off the question as well as the wave of concern that starts bubbling up your chest all over again.
âIâve just been a little out of it lately, thatâs all.â
Nanami places his cup down on the counter, his gaze never leaving your face.
âYouâve been âa little out of itâ for a while now, darling.â
Thereâs a weight to his words, a quiet concern that has your defenses rising instinctively. You sit up straighter, forcing a more convincing smile this time.
âIâm fine, really. Just tired. Itâs probably work.â
Itâs true, to some extent. Work has been stressful, the usual demands piling up, but this exhaustion feels⊠different. Itâs deeper, sinking into your bones in a way that no amount of rest seems to fix.
Nanami doesnât say anything right away, but you can feel him assessing you. His silence is almost louder than words. You know he wonât push you to talk, but his patience, the way he waits for you to come to your own conclusion, can be just as insistent.
You sigh, leaning back in your chair and rubbing at your eyes. Thereâs no way youâll get out of this situation, not when your beloved boyfriend sits opposite of you with his calm but demanding orbs staring straight through your soul.
âI donât know. Maybe Iâm coming down with something?â
Itâs a flimsy excuse, and you both know it. But before you can think of anything else to say, a wave of nausea hits you hard and fast, making you lurch forward. You press a hand to your mouth, eyes wide as the world tilts just slightly. Oh god, not again.
Nanami is at your side in an instant, his hand on your back, warm and grounding.
âHey, hey⊠breathe,â he murmurs gently, his thumb rubbing small circles against your spine.
âItâs okay. Just breathe.â
You close your eyes and focus on the rhythm of your breathing, counting each inhale and exhale until the nausea begins to subside. Slowly, you sit back, wiping at your mouth with the back of your hand. The embarrassment is hot on your face, and you canât quite meet Nanamiâs eyes.
âIâm fine, Kentoâ, you mutter, though you can tell it sounds unconvincing.
Nanamiâs hand is still on your back, his touch firm yet gentle. He doesnât say anything, not yet. You know heâs waiting, giving you space to figure out whatâs going on. But even through your haze of denial, a part of you knows the truth is starting to unravel.
âDoes this happen often?â
His voice is calm, but thereâs an undercurrent of something more. Something you canât quite place.
You swallow hard, not sure how to answer.
âItâs just been the past couple of weeks,â you admit quietly.
âI think itâs stress. Maybe some kind of stomach bug?â
Nanamiâs brow furrows slightly, and he crouches down beside your chair, his eyes searching your face with that same quiet intensity.
âAre there any other symptoms?â
Your mouth opens to say no, but then you stop, thinking back over the past few weeks. The tiredness, the nausea, the strange sensitivity to smells, your shifting moods - small things youâd brushed off or tried to ignore. But now, all at once, it feels like theyâre adding up, slotting together in a way that you hadnât considered before.
You glance down at your hand, the one resting on your stomach, and something inside you clicks.
Oh.
Oh.
Nanami must notice the shift in your expression because his hand stills on your back.
âWhat is it?â he asks, his voice low and steady.
You swallow hard, the words catching in your throat before you finally manage to speak.
âI think⊠I might be pregnant.â
There. Youâve said it. And the weight of those words hangs heavy in the air between you, a truth you hadnât been ready to acknowledge until now.
Kento doesnât react immediately. His expression stays calm, though you can see the flicker of something in his eyes - surprise, perhaps, or maybe something more. Did he already suspect this? Is this why he pushed you to think about your symptoms further? Slowly, he straightens up, standing in front of you now as he takes a deep breath.
âAre you sure?â
You shake your head, feeling a little lost.
âIâm not. I⊠I hadnât really thought about it until just now.â
The truth is, you hadnât considered the possibility at all. With everything going on - work, life, the general busyness of existing, it hadnât crossed your mind that this could be the reason behind everything youâve been feeling.
But now that itâs out in the open, you canât help but wonder how you missed the signs.
Nanamiâs hand gently cups your chin, tilting your face up so that youâre looking at him. His gaze is steady, calm in a way that grounds you, just like always.
âLetâs not jump to conclusions yet,â he says quietly.
âBut if you think thereâs a chanceâŠâ
You nod, your throat suddenly tight.
âYeah. There might be.â
For a long moment, neither of you says anything. The air between you feels thick with unspoken emotions, a quiet understanding settling between you. Nanami steps closer, his hand moving from your chin to cup your cheek instead, his thumb brushing against your skin.
âWeâll figure this out,â he murmurs, his voice soft.
âTogether.â
The sincerity in his words washes over you, bringing with it a flood of emotions you hadnât realized you were holding back. You blink, your vision blurring slightly as you reach up to cover his hand with yours.
âIâm scared,â you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.
Nanamiâs expression softens, and he leans down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.
âI know. But whatever happens, weâll face it together. I promiseâ he mutters against your skin.
You nod, your heart swelling with a mix of fear, uncertainty, and something else, something warmer, softer. You arenât alone in this. No matter what happens, you have your boyfriend by your side, steady and unshakable.
He pulls back slightly, his eyes meeting yours again.
âDo you want to take a test?â he asks, his voice careful, as if heâs gauging your readiness.
You hesitate, biting your lip.
âI⊠I donât know. Maybe? I mean, I guess I should, right?â
Nanami nods, but he doesnât push.
âWhenever youâre ready.â
The idea of taking a test feels overwhelming, like it would make everything real in a way youâre not sure youâre prepared for. But at the same time, the uncertainty is starting to weigh on you, the not knowing gnawing at the edges of your thoughts.
You take a deep breath, closing your eyes for a moment as you try to gather yourself. When you open them again, Nanami is still there, watching you with that quiet patience youâve come to rely on so much.
âOkay,â you say finally, your voice trembling just a little.
âOkay. Iâll take a test.â
Nanami squeezes your hand gently, a reassuring presence beside you.
âIâll go get one,â he offers, his tone calm and matter-of-fact, like heâs suggesting something as simple as picking up groceries.
You nod, feeling a little more settled now that a decision has been made.
âYeah, okay. Thank you.â
He leans down, pressing another soft kiss to your forehead before pulling back.
âIâll be back soon.â
With that, he grabs his keys and heads for the door, casting one last glance over his shoulder before he slips out into the hallway.
Once heâs gone, the quiet of the apartment feels almost too loud. You sit there for a long moment, staring at the cup of tea in front of you, your mind racing with thoughts you canât quite hold onto.
Pregnant. You might be pregnant.
The idea feels too big, too surreal to grasp, and yet itâs there, lingering just at the edge of your awareness. A part of you is scared, terrified of the changes this could bring. But another part, a part youâre only just beginning to acknowledge, feels something else. Hope, maybe? Excitement? Itâs hard to tell.
All you know for sure is that everything feels different now, that your whole life will be turned upside down if this test comes out positive.
When Nanami returns a short while later, test in hand, you take it from him with trembling fingers. He doesnât say anything, just gives you a small, reassuring nod as you disappear into the bathroom.
The minutes that follow are some of the longest of your life. You pace back and forth in front of the sink, your heart pounding in your chest as you wait for the results. The silence feels deafening, and all you can do is focus on your breathing, trying to keep yourself calm.
Finally, the time is up. You glance down at the test, your breath catching in your throat as you read the result.
Positive.
You stare at it for a long moment, your mind struggling to process what youâre seeing. And then, slowly, the reality starts to sink in.
Youâre pregnant.
With shaking hands, you open the bathroom door to find Nanami standing just outside, waiting. He looks up at you, his expression calm but expectant.
âWell?â he asks quietly.
You swallow hard, your voice catching in your throat as you hold up the test.
âItâs positive.â
For a moment, Nanami doesnât say anything. His eyes flicker to the test in your hand, and then back to your face, his expression unreadable. And then, slowly, he steps forward, wrapping his arms around you in a gentle, grounding embrace.
âWeâre going to be okay,â he murmurs against your hair.
âYouâre going to be okay.â
And somehow, with his arms around you, you really believe him. Maybe you will be able to work this out. After all, you have none other than Kento Nanami by your side, right?
âKentoâŠâ, you begin, the flood of sniffs and wild emotions now slowly but surely calming down.
âWhat is it, darling?â
âDid youâŠdid you know?â
He sends a small smile your way while gently stroking a strand of hair behind your ear.
âI couldnât be sure. But after seeing you like this for a couple of weeks now, I had some suspicionsâ, he admits quietly.
You let out a huff.
âI canât believe you realized it earlier than I did.â
âYou are my life, (y/n). I notice every little thin about you.â
âAnd now youâll be the father of a childâ, you breathe out.
The words still feel strange while rolling off your tongue. Kento Nanami will be a father â the father of your child.
You are pregnant.
This is real.
âAnd I couldnât ask for a better mother for my child.â
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#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#nanami#kento nanami x reader#nanami x reader#nanami x you#nanami x y/n#nanami fluff#nanami kento x reader#kento nanami#kento x reader#kento x y/n#kento x you#nanamin#nanami kento#kento fluff#nanami kento x you#nanami kento fluff#jjk fanfic#jjk fluff#jjk nanami#jjk kento nanami#jujutsu kaisen nanami#jujutsu nanami#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x female reader
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okay so, I really don't like angst so I'll go with jealous!Hotch đ€
Something like when Reader is at Jack's soccer game and Idk, a dad flirts with her? But when Jack sees that she's talking with someone who isn't Hotch, he calls her "mom" in front of the dad who's flirting with her, (bc he's jealous too đ€) but Hotch hears him and he's kind of moved, but someone is flirting with his girl so he gets all jealous and starts like kissing her or something in front of the man? And the night they end up at his home, with Hotch showing her that she belongs to him đ€
(feel free to change anything, don't worry, also, sorry for my bad english, it's not my first language đ)
keeping score
đ€ minors dni cw; fem!reader, jack calls reader mom, unwanted advances, suggestiveness, allusions to sex, small praise, dominant!jealous!possessive aaron đŠ wc; 1.5k
early saturday mornings - grass still slightly wet from the dew, the sun slowly rising higher into the sky (threatening a hot day), sat alongside a soccer field - you couldn't imagine another place you'd rather be.
as aaron was the coach, you spent majority of jack's game sitting alone. it was a small price to pay; you were more than happy to cheer on jack from the sidelines, and to check aaron out as much as you wanted.
but most importantly, attending his games made you feel like you were a part of the family. the hotchners were closed off and let very few people in, and so your attendance here only solidified your role in both their lives. that aaron planned on keeping you around, and that jack trusted you. your role in his life wasn't to someday replace his mom, but rather you were just another person who simply loved him. you loved him like he was your own, and he knew it.
"mornin'," a voice pulled you from your thoughts; a familiar face amongst the other parents on the team, but you didn't know him by name.
you offered a quick, friendly smile, "good morning."
he set up camp near you, setting his foldable chair down and getting settled a few feet away. you paid him no mind, resuming your attention to something more worthy of your focus, such as how attractive aaron looked in the jeans he was wearing. and the game, obviously.
however, you could feel him peering at you from time to time, making the hair on the back of your neck stand up.
ten minutes or so passed before he spoke again, "so, big soccer fan?"
your eyes followed jack, who was dribbling the soccer ball down the field. your heart swelled with pride as he successfully kicked it to a teammate, "not until recently."
"me too." he offered you a look that he probably thought was slick, while you kept your gaze straight forward. "i'm always looking to score, if you know what i mean."
his words instantly caused your cheeks to burn, along with your whole body. it was clear he was objectifying you, with no good intentions in mind.
you didn't bother replying. hopefully, that would be a clear indicator for him to leave, or to leave you alone.
but he still chose to linger. and while he wasn't speaking, in your peripheral you kept noticing his head turn, gazing in your direction. his eyes were nearly burning a hole into you.
"shit." he swore as he suddenly stood up, picking up and moving his chair even closer to yours, "the grass is eating away at my chair. must've been that damn rain last night."
it hadn't rained last night.
the unsettling feeling he was causing you only grew, but again you didn't dare to say anything. the uncomfortableness only eased when the whistle finally blew, signaling halftime. this meant a water break and a small snack for the kids, and it meant aaron and jack would soon be joining you for a moment.
as expected, jack hurried towards you as soon as one of the other moms distributed him his snack, but paused abruptly as he reached you, his eyes scanning between you and the man. a confused expression filled his face, his bottom lip sticking out into a pout. it was the same one he produced whenever aaron gave him the fifteen minute warning for bedtime.
"mom," jack inserted himself in between the two of you, a small package of fruit snacks in hand, "can you open these for me?"
you froze for a spilt second, touched and surprised. you've been a constant in both aaron and jack's lives for almost a year now. but that title, was a first.
"of course sweet pea," you coughed a bit to clear your throat, and to stop the tears from surfacing, opening it for him.
"you did good out there kiddo," the dad spoke again, flashing a smile.
your fists clenched at that one - you knew he was trying to impress you, and you hated how he had decided to use interacting with jack to his advantage.
just wait until you find how he's the coach's son.
while you were furious, jack ever so slightly rolled his eyes, such an annoyed expression almost humorous for a child his age, choosing to focus on his snack and leaning comfortably against your shoulder.
and a minute or two later, aaron joined.
as aaron approached, his face nearly pulled into the same expression as his son's as he analyzed the visual in front of him. only his was accompanied with a more hardened, possessive aggressiveness.
"hi sweetheart," aaron greeted you, leaning in to kiss you once you were on your feet. it wasn't a chaste peck either, but rather more showy. his fingers grasped onto the waistline of your pants, pulling you flush to him. "enjoying the game?"
you nodded, still recovering from the unexpected heated kiss, looking down at jack who also was glued to your side, offering protection of his very own. you gave him a smile, ruffling his hair gently, "i think we've got a soccer star on our hands."
"speaking of," aaron started, straightening his torso and squaring his shoulders, making him appear taller. "jack, why don't you join the others. they're taking turns aiming at the goal before the game resumes."
with a nod, and after handing you the empty wrapper, jack ran off to his teammates. aaron was still holding his menacing glare, but dropped the entire expression suddenly.
"how are you feeling?"
"feeling...?" your eyebrows quirked in confusion.
"you're not too sore today, aren't you?" his eyes darted behind you, a rather confident, fiery glint within them. "i wasn't holding back last night, was i?"
oh.
"and now that i'm thinking about it, i don't think you've ever been that loud either."
aaron had always been a stickler for pda; any displays were kept to quick kisses, hand holding, and any suggestive comments were kept to a murmur, meant for you and you only. even when you tagged along with him to bau outings, such as a bar on a saturday night, he held back. anything more was private, and aaron preferred it that way - him being the only one to witness you in such a vulnerable state, was something he took gratification in, and only added to his overall pleasure.
so this, was something else. he wasn't speaking loud enough for all to hear, just enough for the man in question. your back was towards him, so you had no idea how he was reacting to aaron's words.
"i'm fine." you managed, your body also reacting immediately.
aaron's lips found home behind your ear, again conscience of his volume - just loud enough. "good, because i'm not done with you yet."
aaron's hand slid up to the small of your back, but not without stopping on the curve of your ass first - again he wasn't subtle about it, making sure it was noticeable.
and it had to be working, for the man hadn't uttered a single word.
"and actually, sweetheart." another glare pointed behind you. "would you mind helping me at the bench for the rest of the game? i could use an extra set of hands."
"of course." you blurted out, complying without a second thought.
"good girl," he was heavy on the emphasis, patting your hip affectionately. "c'mon."
you were visually flustered as you leaned down to gather your belongings, especially when aaron's hand rested on the small of your back as you did so. your eyes lifted to the man, who was avoiding all eye contact, staring off into the field with a flushed face.
once you straightened up aaron took your hand, leading you away.
"thank you." you mumbled as your hand slid up his arm, giving his bicep a squeeze.
aaron's jaw clenched. "i fucking hated the way he was looking at you."
"you wouldn't like what he was saying either." you mumbled, causing aaron's nostrils to flare in anger. but to calm him, you changed the subject, heat filling your cheeks again, "and you."
a pleased, closed lip smile graced his face. "what about me?"
"what was all that?" you teased, stomach fluttering. you already knew the answer, but it was something you wanted to hear from him again. "i've never heard you, so..."
he chuckled softly, an almost embarrassing undertone to his words. "vocal?"
"yeah." you blurted out, blinking. "it was hot."
aaron shrugged, satisfied but still agitated. "he was devouring you, practically undressing you with his eyes."
"well, i don't think he'll be trying anything again."
"i know he won't," aaron's eyes darkened as his overly confident demeanor resurfaced, his lips pulling into a smirk as one of his fingers tapped your neck, "especially when he sees you next week. because you won't be covering up those marks."
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fluff#aaron hotchner smut#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner imagine#criminal minds#criminal minds smut#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds drabble#aaron hotchner drabble#criminal minds fanfiction#hotch imagine#criminal minds x you
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Sundresses and breeding kinks
A/n: was too lazy to make a collage for this Iâm sorry đ
Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader
Warnings: g!p Natasha, top!natasha, sub!reader, daddy kink, housewife kink, breeding kink, extremely rough sex, crying, degradation (sort of?)
Summary: Natasha breeds you. Thatâs it. Thatâs the summary.
It was a typical Saturday afternoon at the Romanoff household. You were cleaning the bathroom counters having been neglecting the task the whole week. Itâs not your fault! Seems like your wife wants to be balls deep inside you every second!
But of course, the task was interrupted by a certain redhead. âYour ass looks so good from here baby.â She commented, her eyes shamelessly ogling you.
You rolled your eyes ever so slightly and turned around. âNat, please let me continue cleaning. I havenât been able to get things done all week!â
The assassin just chuckled lightly as she walked towards you, caressing your face. âSuch a good little housewife huh?â
Your knees buckled. She knew how much you got turned on from being called her housewife. âI- um-â and you were already stuttering. Great.
Natasha walked closer to you, backing your up against the counter, her bulge touching your crotch. âIs it such a crime I want to fuck my wife all the time? I just canât get enough of her.â
âI love being fucked by you, Nat. But I canât be a housewife if I donât do any of my chores.â You chuckled.
âRight. Which is why you need a baby. We need a baby.â Your eyes widened at her words.
âA-a baby?â You asked. She began to grind against you. âYes. I want to breed you, detka. Cum so deep inside you that you forget who you are for a few seconds.â
You bit your lip, your core began to heat up. âIâd love that, daddy.â The use of the nickname got her even more hard if that was even possible. She growled lowly and smashed her lips to yours, squeezing your breasts as she did so.
âSo fucking pretty. All for me huh?â She asked with a teasing smile.
âAll for you daddy.â You moaned. She easily picked you up and carried you out of the en-suite and into your bedroom, laying you down on the bed. Immediately she lifted your dress up and pulled down your panties.
âSuch a pretty pussy.â She growled, before diving in and eating you out like a starved woman. You gripped her hair as she worked her tongue through your folds and up to your clit. You curled your toes as you got closer and closer to the edge.
âDaddy, Iâm gonna cum!â You moaned. âCum for me pretty girl.â Natasha spoke against your core sending vibrations throughout your body. You screamed as you squirted out you finish. Natasha groaned that that. She loves that youâre a squirter. Makes it ever the more fun.
âFucking love when you squirt baby. Makes it so fucking hot.â She groaned. She then straight up ripped your dress off groaning at the fact that you were wearing no bra underneath.
âNaughty girl.â She snickered, groping your tits, burying her face in between them. âI love these tits.â She groaned.
You felt her cock touch the inside of your thigh and you shifted ever so slightly. âHmm? You want this cock in your pussy? Want daddy to fill you up?â You nodded with tear filled eyes. âPlease daddy.â You whispered.
The redhead entered you with such ease and groaned at the fact. She began the fuck you harder than she ever had before, gripping your hips with such intensity that was definitely going to leave bruises the next morning.
She rolled her eyes back as she fucked you. You were both a moaning mess.
Suddenly she stopped. âTurn over, grip onto the headboard so I can ruin you properly.â Her words sent a shiver down your spine and you quickly complied, gripping onto the headboard.
The Russian smacked your ass as she plunged back into you, gripping your hips again and pounding into you fast. Your vision was blurry and your tits were bouncing like crazy as her cock hit your velvety walls again and again.
The only sounds in the room were those of skin slapping, moans, grunts, and the headboard shaking against the wall.
âDaddy!!!!â You cried as you reached your second orgasm, tears streaming down your face due to how rough she was being. But you loved it.
As if she already knew she growled, âCum around my cock baby. Iâm gonna spill my load inside you in just a few seconds. Fuck!â
You clenched and her and your vision went white for a moment as you felt pure ecstasy. That mixed with the feeling of her warm cum painting your walls made you weak and you practically fell face first onto the pillow.
Natasha was catching her breath behind you and pulled out, laughing at how you fell. âGuess I fucked my girl a little too hard huh?â
âNo, loved it daddy. Want it to happen again.â You muttered into the pillow and she surprisingly understood you.
#marvel#marvel x reader#g!p natasha#natasha romanoff x reader#Natasha Romanoff smut#top natasha romanoff#sub reader
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Hiii, just started following you, your work if amazing đ love it. I love smut but I love fluff as well. Was wondering if you could do a fluff for me.
Reader Ă Theodore nott
Reader is shy, sensitive and can't say no to anyone. Reader and Theo are already dating and he is super overprotective. One day when she's in class, a boy asks her to tutor him so she starts tutoring him, but during their lesson he starts touching her is inappropriately, she ends up leaving in tears(he didn't do much, he just touched her thighs then shouted at her when she complained). Theodore finds her crying and finds out why and beats the guy up till he has to visit a hospital. I know its long đ I just love jealous men
protect
pairing: theo nott x reader
content: read the ask, warnings: fighting, use of the word slut and whore, crying, inappropriate touching
a/n: I love jealous men toođ
Theo had not one idea as to why you were with him. You were a complete sunshine, never said no to anyone and were by far the kindest human theo had ever met.
Though people try to take advantage of your kindness, Theo's always there to protect you. He hates seeing his girl unable to say no even when she wants to and so, he helps her when he can.
However on that particular Saturday morning, your boyfriend hadn't accompanied you to breakfast, running late as usual and you had been approached by a boy in your class.
He had taken the opportunity of the empty seat beside you, which you saved for Theo, and decided to sit on it. Mattheo looked at him with an amused expression, eager to see Theo's reaction.
Theo came stumbling into the great hall, no robe, tie askew, and eyes searching for his beloved. His eyes land upon you, along with your uncomfortable expression.
He sits beside Mattheo, "You've not said anything to this boy?" Theo looks at you while you nod your head at said boy once more and he gets up while having a mischievous smile on his face.
"You really think, if I had said something he would still be there?" Theo chuckled at the statement, getting up to finally sit beside his girlfriend.
"Morning darling, what was that about?" he had a toast in his mouth, hanging off. He was trying to find the butter and you were sure you've never seen a much cuter sight.
Your hands instinctively find his tie, adjusting it as you speak. "He wants me to tutor him this afternoon." You pat his tie one last time before returning to your breakfast.
Theo rolls his eyes at your naiveness and how you don't see that boy was flirting with you, but decided to not say anything.
Later that afternoon, you wished you were still with Theo when you were sitting in the library with the boy whose name you had forgotten by now was sitting way too close.
You had decided if he moved any closer you would say something, anything. His hand moved around your shoulders, awkardly pulling you in, while his other hand met your thighs and you pulled away.
Your pulling away didn't help because the hand around your shoulder only pulled you closer. "Please move away from me." You had finally let out.
"Why, cause you're a little slut, whoring yourself out for your little boyfriend?" His words hit you, is this how people perceived you?
You had finally broken free of his hold, pushing yourself up along with your bag and running towards your dorms.
You shut the door, threw your bag on the floor, and got in your bed. You hugged your knees to your chest and started bawling your eyes out.
It was evening now and Theo hadn't seen you, deciding to check up on you, he went to your dorm. Knocking slightly, he entered and immediately thoughts of worry filled him.
You had cried, that much was clear from your face, but he wanted to know why. He sat beside you and you immediately hugged him, starting to cry again.
"What happened darling?" He asked in the most gentle voice he could muster up. He was ready to kill whoever had done this to his girl, but first he needed her to calm down.
"That boy, from this morning he-" you choked up, remembering his words and his touch and feeling disgusted by it.
"What did that fucker do, did he touch you?" Theo was seething, his jaw was tensed, few of his veins were visible.
You nodded and continued, "He touched me here," You brought his hands to your thighs. "He called me a slut, who was whoring herself out for you" Your voice was heavy and you looked ready to cry again.
Theo pulled up the sleeves of his shirt, wiping your tears with it, and pulled you up on your feet. Getting your shoes, from beside your bed, he knelt and helped you put them on.
"Where are we going, Theo?" you asked while he held your hand and pulled you towards with him to his dorm, you had never seen him this angry.
"To show that idiot, whose girl he was messing with" Slamming the door to his dorm open, he went into his bathroom while Mattheo, Enzo, and Draco looked around in confusion.
Theo came out with a baseball bat, handing one to Mattheo who only grinned and yelled, "Hell yeah" at the sight.
Theo held your hand again, pulling you along with him once more but this time three more boys were accompanying you.
The boy was sitting at the table in the great hall, surrounded by his friends, Theo left your hand and kissed your forehead before pulling the guy backwards using his shirt.
He was on the ground, while all four of them were surrounding him, the boy's friends had ran after seeing exactly who had pulled him down.
"Do you really think, you will mess with my girl and I'll stay silent?" He asked, laughing slightly, swinging the bat over his shoulder and the guy had just started to utter some words before Theo's bat hit his leg.
He groaned out in pain, and you winced at the sight. All three boys had now begun hitting the boy with all their might.
Finally after a while, professor Snape had arrived to break off the fight, giving them all a week's worth of detention while carrying the boy to the hospital wing.
Theo's hand came up to clean his face while he walked towards you, putting your face in his hands he whispered, "I'll always protect you, no matter what" and all you did was smile.
#harry potter#slytherin#draco malfoy#theo nott#enzo berkshire#theo nott fic#theo nott x reader#theo nott x y/n#theo nott x you#theodore nott#theo nott imagine#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott fic#theodore nott imagine#theo nott one shot#theodore nott scenarios#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#chitafluff
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What I Need
Note - the longest fic Iâve ever written đ Iâve added a little âbreakâ halfway through so if you did want to stop and come back to read the rest later itâs easier to see where youâve left off but if you want to read it all in one go feel free đ©· thank you @carlottawllms for the initial request and Iâm sorry it took so long to get to đ and thank you to all my besties for your help with this, I couldnât do it without you đ©· I know itâs long but feedback would be appreciated immensely and I promise to never write a fic this long again đ
Pairing - Mason Mount Ă Reader
Word count - 20.5k
Warnings - angst and fluff
Just once you thought you might be treated to a well deserved lie in this Saturday but unfortunately the universe had other plans for you, just like always.
Your phone had been vibrating for a few minutes on the nightstand and you knew it was someone trying to call you before a barrage of texts were sent your way. Letting them fly in before you picked your phone up to see who it was and what they wanted even though you knew exactly who it was and why they were pestering you at this ungodly hour.
You already make it feel like itâs not worth living you thought, but before you could think about anything else his photo flashed up on your screen as he tried to call you again and you begrudgingly hit accept before you were permanently etched into his bad books.
âHello?â
âAbout bloody time y/n, what the hell have you been doing?â He scolded you. His voice hushed but you could tell he wanted to shout at you for not picking up and you rolled your eyes at his stupid attitude that you didnât need this time of the morning.
âSleeping, Mason. You know what probably most of the uk population is doing right now since itâs stupid oâclock on a bloody Saturdayâ
âWell I donât give a shit, I need you. How fast do you think you can get here?â
âI donât know, Mase-â you started, not ready to leave the comfort of your bed just yet but he was cutting you off as soon as he realised what you were about to say.
âNo, y/n donât do this. Did you not see my message? Code red yeah, that means I need you here nowâ
âIâm sure itâs not that bad, you big girls blouseâ
âSheâs offering to make me breakfast. Pancakes if you pleaseâ he told you, his voice an octave higher as if he couldnât believe what he was saying to you and you had to hold in a giggle at how ridiculous he sounded.
âYou love pancakesâ
âNo I love your pancakes, there's a difference. I donât know what she puts in hers she could drug me for all I know. Or make the whole wheat ones like a maniacâ
âI mean itâs hard to fuck up pancakes im sure theyâre-â
âCan we forget about the bloody pancakes, how long till youâre here?â He demanded, but you were already up and pulling a hoodie on before stuffing yourself into your shoes.
âIâll be five minutesâ you sighed, grabbing your keys and walking out the door as Mason repeatedly told you to hurry up until you had to hang up as you began to drive.
How it became the routine of you bailing him out of these situations was a long story.
Mason had been your best friend since you were little. Your dad being one of his first football coaches and even though you went to separate primary schools you still saw him most weekends when you helped out and sometimes joined in with the games. Mason teaching you how to kick the ball properly and you knew when you scored your first goal he let you win.
You eventually stopped going to practice, not seeing Mason at all for a year or so until you both wound up going to the same secondary school and itâs like you picked up where you left off.
You watched each other grow from awkward little teenagers to full grown adults and as much as you tried to keep your friendship the same you knew it would never be normal.
You went the usual route; college, uni, big office job in a fancy company while Mason lived his dreams and changed right before your eyes. Subtle changes that came over time meaning you never really caught onto them but the shy polite boy you once knew was gone.
He was cocky and sure of himself. Cheeky in a way that all the girls loved and he used it to his advantage to get exactly what he wanted. You werenât blind, you know he was handsome but the way he threw his money and looks about just to get into some poor girls knickers made you sick sometimes but you stuck by him through it all. Feeling like you were the only person who had his best interest at heart most of the time.
Mason didnât have friends, he had yes men. People to tell him he looked good and that it didnât matter what he did or what he said to people because theyâd clear it up for him afterwards. Leaving his picture perfect image intact so the world still thought he was a good boy even though he was anything but.
You didnât know when, but you too had fallen into that category. Running around after him like he was a toddler that had just learned to walk, trying to protect him from crashing into things he shouldnât be and picking up all of his mess after him for little to no thanks. You didnât even know why you did it at this point. A sense of loyalty maybe? Or wanting to keep him away from certain people that you knew only used him. You knew he was a grown man at the end of the day and he was old enough to look after himself but still you carried on.
Even the routine of helping him kick girls out of his house was a mystery to you. The first time was a mistake when youâd turned up heartbroken on his doorstep after a failed exam and the girl heâd managed to score that night made a swift exit much to his satisfaction. Telling you heâd been trying to get rid of her for an hour but she wouldnât budge and you were the perfect solution.
When he called you up and asked if you could do something similar for him the next week you refused at first. Thinking it was weird and you were worried about the girls feelings but he wore you down like he always did until the next thing you knew you were fake crying on his door mat as he ushered a pretty blonde girl out the door with the fake promise of calling her back later that day.
You must have helped him throw at least 30 girls out now. A catalogue of excuses at your disposal and even though you knew it was weird, it had merged itself in as just another part of your friendship and soon enough you were pulling onto his drive and housing yourself out of your car.
You rang the doorbell to make it look more realistic, the door opening a few moments later to Mason who looked more than relieved to see you and you quickly made your way inside to start the act.
âWhat do you want? Dead relative, dog or something worse?â You asked him, pinching your cheeks so they looked pinker before squirming yourself in the eyes with your water bottle. Youâd tried and tested the lot but the sports cap you found was the best at making it look like actual tears.
âDogs fine, sheâs been yapping on about hers all morning and showing me pictures so-â
âYouâre so cruel, Masonâ you remarked, hoping to make him feel a little bit bad about what he was doing but you knew it was all in vain. He never did.
âJust start crying before I make you, yeah?â He laughed so you took the opportunity to get him back and wailed out the loudest fake cry you could muster right in his ear. The sound making him jump before he bounded you into his arms so you could cry into his neck and before you knew it, the sound of a very concerned but sweet sounding woman could be heard in the hallway.
âMason? Is everything okay?â
âNo really noâ he told her, the fake worry in his voice making you roll your eyes but you carried on sniffling to help him out. âThis is my best friend and sheâs had some awful news this morningâ he told her, walking you towards the living room so he could sit you on the sofa. âIâm really sorry to do this, her dogs just died and she needs meâ
âOh my godâ
âYeah sheâs really not in a good wayâ he confirmed, pulling you in closer and your cries went up in volume and you felt him pinch your side gently as if to tell you to tone it down.
âWell can I help at all?â She offered and you actually felt a little sorry for her. She seemed too sweet and you wondered how Mason had got his grubby little claws into her but youâd seen him on nights out and knew how he trapped women under his spell. You were just thankful that you were immune to his powers as if someone treated you like this youâd swing for them.
âI think itâs best I just stay with her for now, but Iâll text you yeah? Iâve got your number saved?â
âOh, yeah okay thenâ she uttered before the pair of them fled upstairs to get her things and within a few minutes he was with her at the door. Hearing the talk in hushed tones before he shut the door behind her but you let your cries continue.
âAlright you can stop that now, sound makes my brain acheâ he groaned as she flopped down onto the sofa next to you and you laughed as you unhid your face from the cushion.
âYouâre welcome, by the wayâ you told him. Bumping your shoulder into his as you sat up but he just rolled his eyes. You knew he was thankful even if he didnât say it exactly but it would be nice to hear it sometime.
âYou fancy some breakfast? Iâm in the mood for pancakesâ he winked but you just rolled your eyes at him. Pancakes sounded good to you too but you knew youâd be stuck making them.
âWhereâs Ace? Heâs the only reason Iâm hereâ you asked, deflecting his question as you knew what he was asking and by the look he was giving you he wasnât too happy about it.
âCharmingâ he scoffed before whistling and the sound of bounding paws made you smile until Ace was running in and jumping into your lap.
âHi babyâ you cooed, scratching over his head and trying to avoid the face licks he was sending your way but Mason was just looking at you like he was waiting for something.
âSo⊠whatâs happening with the pancakes?â
âAce, your daddy is a very silly man, did you know that?â You babbled but you could tell Mason was offended with what youâd said.
âDonât turn my son against meâ
âDo you want some pancakes, acey? Mumma will make you someâ you babbled too him, knowing there was no way for him to answer but from the look on his face you could thatâs what he wanted.
âSince when are you his mumâ Mason commented, trying to reach over to pet him but you wouldnât let him. Jumping up so Ace could follow you and he just sighed and rolled his eyes.
âSince Iâm one of the only stable females in his life, okay? Donât confuse him nowâ
You left Mason in the living room so you could make some pancakes. Your own belly rubbing as you hadnât had a chance to think about breakfast this morning but thankfully he had everything in and as soon as he smelt them you heard him walking in to grab some.
âWhy are you making little ones?â He questioned, grabbing some juice from the fridge and a couple of glasses.
âTheyâre for aceâ you shrugged. Plating them up in his little doggy bowl and letting him tuck in before sorting yours and Masons out.
âSo he gets preferential treatmentâ
âDo you ever have a day off?â You muttered, wanting him to just give things a rest for five minutes but you could tell by his laugh he wouldnât be letting up anytime soon.
âShut up, you love meâ he teased, poking you in the sides as he grabbed his plate and the feel of it angered you. He knew you hated being poked and prodded but he just carried on as he loved getting under your skin.
âNot when youâre like this I donâtâ you sighed and even though you were half joking you had realised over the last few times youâd hung out that being around him was a chore sometimes. His usual playful comments had more venum behind them and now you couldnât actually work out if he still liked you or not. Being around him never felt as good as it used to but whenever you got upset about it heâd tell you he was playing so you tried to think nothing more of it. Wondering if you were just hormonal or had forgotten how to take a joke.
Halfway through breakfast your thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell ringing. His eyes looking at you pleadingly as if he wanted you to go and get it but you remained firm and stared back at him.
âPlease, y/n. If itâs her sheâll have me talking for another half an hour. Just make her go away pleaseâ
âFineâ you huffed, getting up and storming to the door and you knew he was smiling from where he sat behind you. âIâm not doing the washing up thoughâ
âHey, you make the mess you tidy it awayâ
âOh get lostâ you muttered under your breath, opening the door to what you expected to me the girl from earlier but thankfully it was just an Amazon delivery guy and you took the parcel with a smile before bidding him goodbye. âMase? Its just an Amazon parcel youâre safeâ
âAh amazing, can you open it for me? Should be just a charging cableâ he nodded as he stacked your plates and took them to the dishwasher, leaving you on your own to tear the box open but once you were in you wanted to vanish into thin air.
What you werenât expecting was the red box that was sitting under the packing paper. The words thin feel jumping out at you first and you groaned loudly as he walked back over to you with a confused expression.
âWhatâs wrong?â
âYouâre gross, I swear to god. Why did you make me open this?â You huffed as you threw the box of condoms his way and he caught it with one hand before looking down with a smile.
âAh i forgot about these, got the ribbed ones this time to see if they make a differenceâ he winked but you just made fake gagging noises as you walked out of the kitchen and back into the living room where he followed you in shortly after. Thankfully hiding the box out of sight from you.
âWhat you doing next Friday? Itâs Woodyâs birthday so weâre going out and he asked me to ask if you wanna comeâ he suddenly piped up with as you turned the tv on and the question took you by surprise.
âWhy didnât he ask me himself?â
âCause he thinks youâre scaryâ he winked âIâm kidding, he was pretty out of it last night when we made plans and he knew Iâd probably see this morningâ
âSo now itâs just standard that I kick the girls out your house for you? And all your friends know about itâ
âPretty much. Iâve given you excellent reviews so if you get calls for similar from the others you can thank me laterâ he teased but you werenât in the mood to argue with him anymore. Huffing as you relaxed back into the sofa but he was soon poking your leg with his finger. âYou coming next week or what? Weâve got a section booked so there wonât hundreds of people and you donât know Iâll pay for youâ
âIâm not worried about paying, Maseâ you told him even though in the back of your mind you were a little bit. Mason like to go to the most expensive places and drink the most expensive things and you couldnt keep up with him half the time so the offer of him playing always settled your nerves when it was nights out like this. âCan I bring Olivia?â
âWhoâs Olivia?â
âThat new girl from work I was telling you about the other day? The one thatâs just moved here and doesn't know anyoneâ you told him before realising he probably hadnât been listening the whole time you were talking about her before.
âIs she hot?â
âMason-â
âIm kidding, Iâm kidding, You can bring the pope for all I careâ he shrugged but you knew even if you asked him not to go near her he still would.
âMason I'm serious, I donât want you anywhere near her okay? youâll make things awkward at work and she wouldnât touch you with with a barge pole anywayâ
âWow y/n, Iâm bruisedâ he told you, hand on his heart to make it look like he was hurt but you could tell from the tone of his voice he didnât care.
âSheâs got something going on with someone at work and if you ruin it Iâll kill youâ you threatened but he just held his hands up in mock surrender. âWho else is gonna be there?â
âOh the usualâ he told you. Reeling off some names you knew plus a few guys you donât know and you knew what that meant. Mason wanted to try and set you up with someone he knew and even though you appreciate the sentiment you couldnât think of anything worse.
At this point you thought he just felt sorry for you and was trying his hardest to find you anyone. Youâd never had a boyfriend, never been in a real relationship or even been on that many dates. Any you did happen to go on always ended in the same way with that same awful message. I see you more as a friend than a girlfriend but Iâd love to stay in touch and you didnât know what was wrong with you. Even though Mason sometimes tried to help, you didnât want to attract boys like him and his friends so any new boy he was suggesting you almost always never gave a proper chance.
âI was thinking maybe I could put some feelers out? You know put a good word in with a few of the lads and see if any are interested-â
âIâd rather eat my own eyeballs than date one of your friendsâ you told him, looking up to his horrified face and just like usual you kept poking the bear. âI only hang out with you cause youâre practically my brother, but the ones that choose to be your friends? I have serious questions for themâ
âAnd yet here you are, spending your morning with me. The main culpritâ
âNot for much longer, Iâm meeting the guys at level up for lunchâ you smiled and he rolled his eyes in annoyance at you.
âSo you used me for my flour and eggs, thatâs what Iâm getting from thisâ
âI wouldnât even be here if you could just keep it in your pants for five secondsâ you reminded him, giving Ace a quick scratch between the ears before you stood up so you could get going but Mason being Mason had to get a few more digs in.
âOh whatever you big dork. Go play with your silly little puzzles then while I fend for myselfâ
Level Up was a gaming cafe in town and you met up with some friends from uni once a month to catch up and play some games but you mostly went there for the puzzles. There was something you loved about starting with a big pile of nothing and ending with something beautiful. It calmed you but almost made your brain feel alive at the same time so it was worth the teasing from Mason's end even if he did think it made you really uncool.
âWhatever, Maseâ you mumbled, gathering your stuff up and making your way to the door before he could say anything else to upset you but you already felt like heâd ruined your day.
You managed to forget about him by the time youâd made it to Level Up. Catching up with your friends from uni, forgetting all that had happened that morning and getting lost in what you loved before making your way back home in the early afternoon. Feeling a lot better about yourself than you had that morning.
Your week at work flew by and soon enough it was Friday and you were at your flat with Olivia getting ready for your night out. Thankfully sheâs said yes to coming and it had given you something to bond over that week. She too had moved to Manchester from down south after uni and was finding the transition a bit strange so youâd taken her under your wing in hopes you could make some more friends around here besides Mason. As much as you loved him you couldnât stand to be around him for long periods of time anymore and wanted someone else to hang out with who didnât make you feel so awful about yourself.
Once the pair of you were ready you set out for a cocktail bar first. Getting a few fancy pre drinks in whilst you chatted over some office gossip and just as you were leaving you posted a few stories to instagram. Seeing straight away that Mason had viewed them and almost as if by magic he was calling you.
âIs that really what youâre wearing?â He asked, the question making your heart drop as you looked down at your out outfit. Admittedly it was your usual but you wanted to be a bit comfortable and it was an outfit youâd always felt good in. His comments deflating you immediately and you felt like turning around and going home.
âWhatâs wrong with it?â You asked in a small voice. Wrapping your jacket around you a little bit further and Olivia looked at you with curious eyes but you just gave her a reassuring smile and carried on listening to Mason.
âI mean itâs fine but like⊠well thatâs it. Itâs fineâ he admitted causing you to gulp back the frog in your throat so you didnât burst into tears. âLook Iâm trying my hardest here to help you get some but you need to start showing a bit of skin. Like if Iâm interested in a girl I wanna see a bit more yeah? You need to advertise what youâve got on offer or youâll never get any business.â
âIâm not looking for business and I certainly donât want to look like someone youâre interested inâ you hit back, trying to make him hurt a little bit but you knew it was useless. Your comments were like water off a ducks back to him. âWhen I find the right guy heâll love how I dressâ
âIâm a guy, y/n. Weâre all the sameâ
âYeah well Iâve just about had enough of you tonight. I think Iâd rather join a nunnery at this pointâ you huffed, feeling Olivia tug on your arm as you made it to the door of the club. âWere just outside Iâll see you in a secâ
âYour names on the door, they should just let you throughâ he confirmed and once youâd said goodbye you were let in by the doorman who led you over to your section. meeting Mason's eyes almost immediately but his were soon on Olivia and you knew it was about to be a long night. âYou gonna introduce me then?â
âHi to you tooâ you quipped, watching him roll his eyes as he pulled you into his side for a quick hug but it was over before you knew it as his eyes settled on Oliviaâs legs. âMason this is Olivia, Olivia this is Masonâ
âHi Olivia, y/nâs told me a lot about youâ he smiled and you knew that smile anywhere. He was about to flirt his little bum off even after youâd told him not too. âIt's nice to finally meet youâ
âYou too, thanks for letting me comeâ she smiled sweetly, trying to be polite but youâd already warned her about Mason and his antics and you were hoping she could see right through him.
âOh youâre invited anytimeâ he winked. âCan I get you a drink?â
âOh um⊠yeah sure, y/n-â
ââItâs alright I know her order off by heartâ he winked before nodding her over to the bar where she followed him after giving you a quick wave.
You took this time to go and say happy birthday to Woody, one of Mason's friends you actually liked as heâd been around almost as long as you had but just like you had fallen into the trap of letting him get away with things he probably shouldnât.
âWhatâs wrong?â He asked, noticing your disgruntled expression fairly quickly but you just sighed before rubbing your head.
âI explicitly told Mason not to flirt with her but heâs all over her, I can't stand that boy sometimesâ you huffed, motioning over to where he was standing with Olivia. His hand on her back and his eyes on her chest and you heard Woody sigh next to you.
âYou know what heâs like, sees a pair of boobs and forgets all logicâ he tried to joke but you werenât in the mood.
You could see Olivia looking for you, your eyes meeting after a few seconds where she gave you the âhelp meâ look and you made your way straight over to get her. Gripping Mason's shoulder as you popped yourself in between them and even though you werenât looking at him you could feel the annoyance radiating off of him.
âThanks for the drink Mase, weâre gonna go have a danceâ you interrupted, not missing the way he rolled his eyes at you as he tried to speak again but youâd already pulled Olivia away and onto the dance floor where you were both giggling as you got lost in the crowd.
âCorr heâs a right flirt, you werenât joking weâre youâ
âHonestly he should come with a warning labelâ you groaned. âIâm really sorry, I did tell him to keep it in his pantsâ
âDonât worry about it, itâs quite flatteringâ she giggled before wrapping an arm around your shoulders. âLetâs just keep it between us, by the looks of things heâs already moved onâ she told you and once you looked around you could see him chatting up some other girl and you decided to leave him to it. Rolling your eyes before you and Olivia got lost in the crowd and danced your little socks off.
When Olivia needed the loo, you let her know youâd go and get the pair of you some more drinks and once at the bar you were ambushed by the man youâd been trying to avoid for the last hour.
âThanks for that earlier, you jumped in at the wrong time just as usualâ Mason exclaimed but you just turned to smile at him sweetly and the action caught him off guard.
âNo thank you, for completely ignoring me when I asked you not to flirt with her as sheâs seeing someone and I didnât want to make things awkward at workâ you reminded him but you noticed how he shut his eyes before looking back at you with a smirk and you knew he was about to get nasty.
âSo let me get this straight, Oliviaâs been working with you for what, three weeks?â He commented and his comment surprised you as you didnât think heâd been listening to you that well whenever you spoke about her but clearly he had.
âJust about, yeahâ
âAnd sheâs already seeing someone?â
âI mean itâs not official but-â
âSo she can find someone⊠but youâve been there years and-â
âOh get fucked Maseâ you spat, your blood boiling at what he was trying to say and you had to restrain yourself from throwing the drinks that had just been placed infront of you in his face. Mason had just put them on his tab though and you didnât want to have to pay for your own so you just balled your fists up and tried to let it wash over you. âAre you getting a kick out of being an arsehole to me tonight or something?â
âIâm just pointing out-â
âWell donât, keep your big nose out of my businessâ you told him, cutting him off mid sentence but you knew your comments hadnât hurt him. Nothing ever did.
âLow blow, y/n. Low blow. Youâre lucky Iâm not self conscious about it as I know it comes in handyâ he teased. Licking his lips to insinuate something sexual and you felt the disgust roll through you. âCome on, letâs go sit. Weâve barely spoken all nightâ
âNo, I donât want toâ
âHey, donât be like thatâ he frowned, but you were done talking to him tonight and youâd have been quite happy to have a few days' break from him after tonightâs interactions.
âIâm not being like anythingâ you huffed, seeing Olivia coming back out from the loo and you used this as your opportunity to get away from him. âOliviaâs back, I need to goâ you told him but you didnât wait for a reaction. Picking up your drinks and making your way over to her but you werenât in the mood to be happy anymore.
You found a quiet corner with Olivia so you could sit and bitch for a bit, mostly about Mason but you moved onto the topic of people you didnât like at work until she opened up about Joe from the IT department who sheâd got the eyes for. Apparently theyâd hit it off from the first day when he handed her her laptop and sheâd been falling for him ever since. Sometimes making up issues and submitting tickets for non-existent problems so they could talk and even though you thought it was cute and you were happy for her, Mason's words from before were playing in your mind.
Why did things like this never happen to you? Why could everyone else find someone but you were forever stuck on the sidelines waiting to be picked. You were used to it now and you told yourself you were over it but there were moments like now when it stung and you didnât want to think about anything anymore.
If truth be told you didnât want to even be in this club anymore and when Olivia had to make a call you used the time to your advantage to try and find Mason to let him know you were going. Not that it would have made much difference to him as youâd barely spoken all night but when you made your way back to your section you knew something was off.
âWhatâs everyone laughing at?â You asked as you approached Woody and a few of the other boys. Woody's appearing awkward but you could see all the other boys were loving whatever was happening. âWhereâs Mason?â
âTrust me, you donât wanna knowâ one of the guys laughed but you were just confused as to what was happening.
âWhat?â You asked, turning towards Woody in hopes heâd give you a bit more of an answer but you could tell he didnât want to. An embarrassed and guilty look on his face as you raised your brows at him until he eventually spoke.
âHeâs um, heâs in the looâ Woody gulped but you didnât understand what the issue was.
âOkay?â
âHeâs not alone in thereâ he whispered and the realisation hit you like a truck.
âYouâre joking? Please tell me youâre jokingâ you whispered back, eyes flying around the room to see if anyone else had caught on but thankfully it was just his little gaggle of yes men that were in on it.
âWell he didnât exactly hide itâ Woody told you but before you could say anything else there was movement from the corner of your eye and you could see he was emerging from the disabled loo with a stupid smirk on his face and you felt sick to your stomach.
The boys were laughing louder immediately but all you felt was embarrassment. Embarrassed that he was your friend and he thought this was okay, embarrassed for whatever poor girl heâd taken in there and embarrassed that clearly everyone knew what was going on and he was just fine with it.
You watched him talk to security before coming back over to your section. The boys slapping his back before he tried to wrap an arm around your shoulder but you just shrugged him off as soon as he touched you. Not even bothering to look up at his disgruntled face as your eyes were trained on the where heâd just come from and before long the girl emerged.
You watched her walk over to the man Mason had just spoken to, Mason clearly telling her heâd put her name in the list for your section but you doubt he even knew her name in the first place and you felt awful as she looked around for Mason to let her in. You were on the edge of marching over there yourself and telling them to let her through but you didnât want to cause more of a scene so you just turned to Mason who was looking at you with an amused grin.
âSeriously, Mason? I know you clearly donât give a shit but thatâs such an awful thing to doâ
âOh stop getting your knickers in a twist, itâs not like I fucked herâ he told you matter of factly an you gasped at the way heâd just spoken to you.
âWhat?â
âI mean Iâll spare you the details but letâs just say she took very good care of meâ
âOh fuck off, I donât wanna know thatâ you told him, wrapping your arms around yourself as if you were trying to block him out but he kept laughing at you like he found the whole thing hilarious.
âOh y/n donât be such a grumpâ he laughed. âMaybe you should think about getting yourself a bit, hopefully they might be able to pull that stick out your arseâ
Mason words cut you deep, and you knew heâd only said it as he was playing on your biggest insecurity but that made it worse somehow. Youâd opened up to Mason a few times about how unlucky in love you felt you were, how you never seemed to grab anyoneâs attention. You knew he tried to help on nights out sometimes but nothing ever worked and you werenât as on board with one night stands as Mason so clearly was. You were the definition of a wallflower and as much as you knew you had a lot of love to give the right person you grew more worried day by day that it would never be a reality for you.
You knew your face had dropped, Masonâs too once heâd realised what heâd said and that heâd taken it too far but you refused to show how upset you were, not just by what heâd said but everything that had happened tonight.
âYouâre a right dick sometimesâ you told him quietly, picking your bag up and storming out. You could hear the faint sound of him scoffing behind you but you didnât have the energy to turn around and berate him anymore. Your eyes already stinging and the sadness rippled over you but you held it together so you could get out the door and sort yourself an Uber out.
You wondered if he might have followed you outside to come and apologise right away but you knew that would never happen. As long as Mason was happy in Mason land he didnât care what he did or said to anyone else and even though you thought you might have been the exception, that clearly wasnât the case anymore.
âY/n? What are you doing out here?â You heard, Turing to see Olivia walking over to you with a concerned expression but you just blinked the tears away and gave her a half hearted smile.
âJust getting some airâ you smiled. âListen, Iâm so sorry about tonight. I didnât realise he was gonna be such an arseâ you apologised but you could see from her face it was all fine and she didn't care.
âItâs not your fault, yeah? Youâre not responsible for himâ she told you and you felt lighter at her words until she gave you a look you couldn't quite place. âBut please donât hate me, Iâve just been on the phone to Joe and heâs invited me over. You donât mind if I go, do you?â She asked and even though it stung slightly you couldn't blame her. Not when you were on your way home too now.
âOf course not, don't be sillyâ you reassured her, thinking that might be the end of it but the sympathetic smile she gave you made you feel worse somehow.
âAre you going back in?â
âI think I might just head home, Iâve had enough of him tonightâ you joked but she knew she could tell there was an air of truth behind it.
âDonât let him ruin your night, why donât you come with me?â She offered but you just looked back at her in confusion.
âWhat? To hang out with you and Joe? I donât think heâll be too happy with thatâ
âOh no heâs at a party at his friends house not too far from here, thereâs a load of people there and a few from work so youâll know a load of themâ she explained and the idea of it being more than just the two of them sweetened the deal a bit.
âI donât knowâ
âPleeeeeeease. Donât let that horrible boy upset you, plus Iâm not done hanging out with you yet. Mason aside Iâve had fun tonightâ she pouted and you felt your resolve slipping. âCome on, Iâll pay for the Uber and everythingâ
âOkay fineâ you laughed. Jumping into the car with her when it turned up and you were only ten minutes into being there once you realised what a good choice youâd made. You never hung out with your colleagues outside of work but you had a lot of fun and even made some new friends. The whole experience teaching you that there was more to life than Mason and you made a promise to yourself to take a step back from him for your own sake.
You made it home at around 3am in a taxi with a friend of Joes whoâd promised to get you home safely. Youâd been talking for most of the night and it was a complete 180 from being with Mason. He made you feel important and heard and when he kissed you cheek at your front door you felt your knees wobble. You blamed it on the drink and being so touch starved but once your were inside you realised how much of a good time youâd had without Mason once more.
The constant fear of what he was going to say or do next, the need to clean up his mess that inevitably always came and the growing embarrassment that came from being around him was getting you down. All you could think about was a break from him and If truth be told you needed a break from everything at this point so made a mental note to book some time off of work for a little break now the weather was getting nicer to go and see your auntie in Spain as a little something to look forward too.
Youâd seen Mason had text you a few hours ago. Wondering where youâd gone and to text him back but you left it. Not wanting to talk to him right now so you got undressed and got into bed so you could wait for the inevitable hangover in the morning.
It was 8am when you woke up and knew your phone was going off every few minutes but you ignored it, not in the mood for whoever it was and when you hadnât received a text for a while you had a quick Look I see they were all from Mason.
You didnât believe his empty threats, ignoring everything heâd written and rolling over onto your other side so you could get back to sleep and thankfully it came easily as you were still so exhausted. He could work things out for himself for one morning surely?
You were expecting your head to be pounding when you next woke up, but youâd never felt it like this before. Never heard it in your ears so intensely or heard your name being called over and over until you realised it wasnât what you thought and when you recognised Mason's voice you groaned into your pillow.
âY/n! Are you in there?â You heard him call. Hoping you could just ignore him and heâd go away but Mason being Mason didnât let up. âRight Iâve not heard or seen you since last night, I donât know where you are or what youâre doing so Iâm calling the policeâ
âOh fuck offâ you huffed, storming out of bed in just your underwear and a tiny T-shirt so you could tell him off, watching Masons head snap up when you opened the door and you didnât miss the way his eyes trailed all over you.
âWhat the fuck are you doing?â You spat, pulling him inside and slamming the door shut before turning to face him with a furious glare. He was looking straight back at you the same way though and youâd never seen him so mad in all the years youâd known him.
âAre you kidding me? What the fuck are you doing? Why are you ignoring me?â
âAre you being serious right now?
âCompletely. And can you go and get dressed you freaking me outâ he remarked but you just placed your hands on your hips and made him look at you.
âNo I canâtâ you told him and you knew he wasn't comfortable with you standing there in next to nothing so you used it to your advantage. âYou were awful to me last night Mason, I mean youâve not been nice for a while but last night tipped me over the edgeâ
âWhat did I do?â
âWhat didnât you do!â You exploded, seeing him visibly jump as he wasnât expecting it but you just kept going, releasing all the pent up aggression and anger heâd made you feel lately and you could feel the tears stinging behind your eyes. âYouâre so rude about me, about the way I dress and just how I am. I told you specifically not to go near Olivia and you did. Not to mention that poor girl you used in the toilet, I take it she wasnât the same girl you took home last?â
âWell no but-â
âI just, I donât like what youâre turning into and Iâm not gonna sit by and watch it happen anymore so if you still want me around you need to fix up and fix up fastâ
âYou canât tell me what to doâ he scoffed, the playfulness he usually spoke at you with now completely vanished and you had a feeling deep in your tummy that this wasnât going to end well yet you carried on.
âWell if you carry on like this then Iâm out Mason. I donât wanna surround myself with you and the people you hang out with anymoreâ
âOh you thought⊠oh thatâs hilariousâ he laughed, clutching his tummy like youâd just told him the funniest joke in the world. âYou actually think I care if you don't wanna talk to me anymore? That Iâd care if I upset you? You really think telling me that is gonna make me change? Get real y/n, weâre not 13 anymoreâ
âWhat?â you breathed, his words feeling like a punch in the gut as he stared down at you and as much as you were trying to be the bigger person in this and make him see how awful he was being, you felt awfully small.
âWell letâs face it, itâs not like weâre even from the same universe at this point and everything I do you take the wrong wayâ he told you and you could feel yourself shrinking as he turned the tables. Bracing yourself to feel his full wrath as you knew he didnât like being told off âYouâre so uptight, y/n and is it any wonder why?â
âYou donât have to get so personal all the timeâ
âBut youâre allowed to? Youâre allowed to have a go at me cause I fuck around a bit and actually enjoy my life rather than play kids games and and make out Iâm holier than thou? Just cause no oneâs ever found you attractive doesnât mean anyone else isnât allowed any funâ
You never thought he could be this mean. His words from last night paled into comparison from what he was saying now and you unconsciously wrapped your arms around yourself as he tore you to shreds.
âYou know I tried to be a good friend, I tried my hardest to find you someone but you throw it back in my face everytime. Not that I think it would have mattered anyway cause they all tell me youâre too stuck up for your own good. No ones ever gonna want you y/n, cause you make it fucking impossibleâ
âI've never been good enough for you have I?â You whispered, watching the muscle in his jaw flex as a single tear rolled down your cheek, but his face remained hard as you tried to let him know how you felt no matter how heartbroken you were. âYou know I always thought it was a bit of fun and teasing, you calling me a nerd or whatever but actually donât like me, do you? But Iâm good enough when you need me, Iâm good enough to come over and kick out whatever girl you need kicking out. Good enough to cook for you and get you everything you needâ â
âOh fuck off, y/nâ he spat, looking away from you and trying to make his way to the door. âYou think I need you that much? Have a laugh, I only kept you around cause you came in handy sometimesâ he laughed, trying his hardest to hurt you and even though it was working you could see in his eyes he didnât mean it. âPeople leave me all the time, why should I give a shit if you do too?â
âMase-â
âNah itâs fine, Iâll go. Sorry for giving a shit about you, I know not to do that again. Donât worry I wonât be backâ
You knew exactly what he was doing. He was being defensive because you were upset with him and he wanted to make you feel bad too. You knew he could be mean but never like this and when he slammed your door in your face you stood there for a few moments just taking it all in. Replaying all the awful things heâd said to you before walking like a zombie back to bed and hiding under the covers so you could let a few tears out but not many came. Too in shock at hurt about what heâd said to form any real emotions but as the days went on you felt worse and worse about yourself.
Three weeks went by and you didnât hear a peep from him. Wondering if maybe you should message him first but after a day you realised he was the one that messed up and you didnât want to be running after him. Heâd completely disappeared from online and youâd even had a cheeky look on some of his update accounts to see if heâd been spotted anywhere but it was just the usual training pictures and nothing more.
It was difficult, getting angrier as the days went by before sadness took its place. He was your best friend and had been for years but you hated everything heâd become and you weren't about to push your boundaries to accommodate him anymore. Not after all the awful things heâd said to you either that wouldnât stop plaguing your mind.
Youâd never felt as ugly as you did right now. His words had hit home as it was things youâd always thought about yourself but to hear them actually vocalised from the person who you thought you meant a lot to stung in a way nothing else ever had. Realising maybe you would be on your own for a long time as there clearly was something wrong with you and as the days passed the harder you cried.
Cried for the friendship you once had, cried for the words heâd spat in your face and cried for how awful you felt about yourself and how lonely you were night after night as you rarely spoke to anyone in fear of your emotions taking over now.
You tried to let it go, carrying on as normal but you could tell Olivia knew something was up. Letting you know she was there for you when you needed but for now you just wanted to wallow a little.
You were sat at home getting lost in a new true crime documentary when you felt your phone ring. Glancing down to see Mason's picture filling up your screen and you instantly froze. Too panicked to answer as you didnât know what youâd say to him right now so you just stared down at the screen until the call ended. Anxious to see if he would call you back at all but he didnât and you presumed it was a mistake until the next day when a text came through from him on your lunch break.
What did he want?
You presumed it was to apologise but at this point you didnât want to hear it. Heâd done and said enough and you were still getting over most of it so to have him back in your life seemed counter intuitive.
So you left him on read and forgot about him. Spending your lunch break with Olivia and Joe but by the time you were back at your desk he was all you could think about. His text had left a weird feeling in your tummy and you felt a little bad about knowing he wanted to presumably apologise but you wouldn't let him but what youâd said was true. You really werenât ready just yet.
Sandra was a person you considered your work mum. A slightly older woman who worked on reception and was the smiling face that always greeted you every morning but she was also the woman you went to for advice and to have a moan to. Sheâs never judged you or told you what to do but it was nice getting an opinion from someone so wise so knowing you were going to see her filled you with a calmness you hadnât felt in a while.
âTheyâve not got your favourite left, but I got you a kitkatâ you smiled as you approached the reception desk, noticing Sandra was looking back at you with an awkward smile that confused you until you looked to your left and were met with the brown eyed boy youâd been avoiding. âMason? How did you even get in here?â
âI let him inâ Sandra smiled, looking over at Mason with a wink and you could see him send her an appreciative smile as he made his way closer to you. Only then clicking the giant bunch of pink and white tulips in his arms and your chest felt tight at the sight of them.
âYou shouldnât have done thatâ you told her lowly, hoping he wouldnât be able to hear but Sandra had other ideas and brought him into the conversation.
âOh come on y/n, how can you say no to that faceâ she pouted, tilting her head over to him and once you looked back at Mason his usual cheeky smile adorned his lips as he playfully batted his eyelashes at you. âYou need to talk to him anywayâ
âNo I donât, whatâs he told you?â you argued back. You purposefully hadn't told Sandra anything about what was going on with Mason as you were embarrassed and wanted to deal with it on your own but you should have known sheâd find out eventually. Mothers always do.
âThat you wonât talk to him and that he wants to tell you how sorry he isâ
âWell he can tell me that himselfâ you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest before you heard him not so subtly coughing. Looking up to find him glancing between the pair of you like he was reminding you he was still there.
âI would if you gave me a chanceâ he laughed before shyly nodding over to the sofa where guests usually waited. Silently asking you to come with him so you could talk a bit more privately and you reluctantly walked over after a beat. Watching Mason pluck a flower from the bouquet in his arms to give to Sandra as a thank you and you almost cracked a smile at how she blushed when she took it. The pair of them whispering a little before he turned to face you and he walked over like a naughty school boy.
âDo we have to do this now?â You asked. Not wanting to have this conversation with him here and now but since youâd been avoiding him you hadnât given him many other options and you could tell from the way he was looking at you he was determined to speak with you.
âYes, we do. Youâre ignoring me and left me no choiceâ
âCan you just be quick?â You asked, not wanting to air your dirty laundry in the reception where Sandra could quite easily hear everything and even though you felt bad heâd put the effort in to come and see you, you were practically turning him away.
âY/n-
âPlease, Mase. Iâm at workâ
âFine, Iâll goâ he huffed and the heartbroken look on his face made your tummy churn. âOnly if you agree I can come over later and apologise properlyâ he told you but you didnât agree straight away and you could see he was getting desperate. âY/n pleaseâ
âOkay fineâ you sighed, nodding your head as you knew it would have to be done sooner or later and since he was making the effort you thought you should cut him some slack. His face softened immediately before his eyes fell to the flowers in his hands that he passed to you in with a shy smile
âThese are for you, your favouriteâ
âThank youâ you whispered, taking them carefully and you knew your face was turning red as you held them to your chest. This was the first bunch of flowers anyone had ever bought you and you could feel your eyes welling up at the fact heâd remembered your favourite ones.
âWell itâs the least you deserveâ he nodded but you didnât know what to say to him, standing there awkwardly until he coughed. âWhat time will you be home?â
âAround sixâ
âOkay well, maybe I could bring us some food over and weâll talkâ
âOkayâ you whispered, nodding gently before looking down as you were so overwhelmed with emotions.
He didnât say anything after that, just touched your arm and planted a quick kiss on your forehead before walking back over to Sandra so he could sign out of the visors book. His action confused you as he never showed you signs of affection aside from the occasional hug so the kiss only made you blush even more. Giving yourself a few seconds to calm down before eventually joining them at the desk.
âLeaving so soon? Sandra pouted as Mason approached her and you couldnât help but roll your eyes at the way she was so clearly wrapped around his finger already.
âYeah, this one wants me goneâ he teased, signing his name in the box but Sandra just threw you a disappointed look and you felt awful instantly.
âOh y/nâ she tutted before looking back at Mason with doe eyes. âIf it were up to me Iâd let you stayâ
âAnd thatâs why you're my number one girlâ he told her. Flashing her his killer smile and sending her wink before turning back to you. âIâll see you later, okay?â
You didnât answer, just nodded before he left with a sad smile and as soon as he was out the door you felt Sandraâs eyes burning holes into the side of your head.
âI tell you what, if I was 30 years younger that boy would be in serious troubleâ she told you, fanning herself with a sheet of paper from her notebook and you felt your resolve crack instantly.
âGod sake Sandraâ you laughed. It was clear that Mason was a hit with the ladies but you didnât know heâd have this hold over someone like Sandra.
âWhatâs he done? Is it really that bad or are you just making him sweat?â She asked casually, the need to spill your guts to her was as overwhelming as ever but something was telling you to keep it under wraps until things with him were sorted so you didnât say anything you might regret.
âHeâs not been the best for a while but we had a massive argument a few weeks back after he pushed everything a bit too far so weâve not spoken in a whileâ
âIâd just kiss and make up if I were you, heâs too pretty to be mad atâ she teased and you knew you were blushing again. This time out of sheer awkwardness.
âItâs not like that, Sandra. Heâs my best friend, nothing more, okay? No kissing or whatever else you think might be going onâ
âIâm not sure about thatâ she mused âHe doesnât look at you like a friendïżœïżœïżœ
âThatâs cause heâs trying to get on my good side probablyâ
âHmmm, weâll seeâ she winked but you didnât want to listen anymore. Quickly making your way back to your desk so she couldnât try and marry you off to your best friend but you could feel everyoneâs eyes on you as you walked through with your flowers. Even Olivia sent you a curious look but you motioned that youâd text her later to explain.
You couldnât focus for the rest of the afternoon. Mason's flowers that were sitting on your desk were a constant reminder that youâd have to see him later and you werenât sure if you were ready to forgive him yet, if ever. Everything heâd said to you and the way heâd made you feel was still fresh in your mind and you knew they would take a while to recover from.
You were sick and tired of forgiving him for the cycle to start over again but you couldnât deny you missed him. Yes things had gotten way out of control but you missed your movie nights and catch ups. You even missed making breakfast together after youâd kicked another girl out for him but you knew it all had to stop. He was a man now and able to look after himself and thatâs what you wanted to tell him.
You werenât expecting him to be on time, he never usually was, but at quarter past six there was a knock on your door. He was earlier than you thought heâd be and when you answered he stood there looking as guilty as ever with a few pizza boxes in his hands and you sent him a small smile before nodding him in.
âCome in, you whispered, walking him into your living room so he could set the pizza down on the coffee table and take a seat but the only choice you had was to sit next to him as you could only fit a small sofa in here. Your flat wasnât the biggest in the world and Mason always told you heâd pay for you to live somewhere nicer but it was time like these you were glad he didnât. Not knowing what might happen if things went up in smoke.
âCan I talk first? Iâve just been thinking about what I wanna say for days and I donât wanna mess it upâ he asked you but you just nodded. Not sure what you wanted to say yourself yet so you figured youâd sit and listen to what he wanted to say first.
âThatâs fineâ you whispered, watching him get settled in his seat before launching into his monologue.
âOkay well, I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for everythingâ he gulped âI know Iâve been the biggest dick and Iâve hurt you but I really am sorry and Iâm gonna prove it to you if youâll let meâ he confirmed and you felt his words swimming through your veins. Never once had you heard him like before let alone hear the words Iâm sorry come out of his mouth and look like he meant it.
âLast time I saw you, when I went off on one, I was just hurt that youâd called me out and I wanted to get you back for it. I know thatâs childish and stupid but you hit home with everything you said and I couldnât take itâ he told you. Clasping his hands together as some form of distraction as he spoke and you knew he was trying his best to hold it together.
âYouâve always been there for me, you know? Youâve always done things for me that you shouldnât have and youâve stuck up for me when you didnât need to but Iâve surrounded myself with the complete wrong people who donât care about me. Theyâre looking for a good time and never tell me no so I thought it was great, but not having you around has just made me realise theyâre not the sort of people I need in my life, yeah? Youâre what I needâ
His strangled voice was pulling at your heartstrings but no matter what he was saying you didnât want to jump right in and accept his apology. There was so much you wanted to say and that you needed him to know about how heâd treated you. You could see he was sorry and it was evident that he was hurt but if you didnât want to let him off easy, you wanted him to understand exactly how you were feeling and leave nothing unsaid so you could move away from it and hopefully move on.
âPlease say somethingâ he gulped, wanting to hear something from you straight away but you knew as soon as you started you wouldn't be able to stop.
âThank you for apologising, it really does mean a lot to me that you came here but i'm really hurt Mase and Iâm not really sure what to sayâ you told him. Your voice sounding thick no matter how hard you tried to hold the tears in and you watched the heartbreak on his face as he saw you get upset.
âIt just sucked, I guess. To feel like you only ever called me when you needed me, like to get rid of someone or if I fit into your plans. Just felt like you didnât give a damn about me ever. Iâve never said anything or judged you about the way you acted, not until recently at least, cause weâre friends but maybe I should have. Like just told you no a couple of times but I just felt so small to you and that it wouldnât make a differenceâ
You could tell he wanted to speak, to let you know that it was all untrue and that he cared about you more than anything but he didnât butt in. He let you speak and gave you your time to get everything out you needed to and it was more therapeutic than you thought it would be.
âYou know I remember the last time I knew I couldnât count on you anymore. It was my last year at uni and I had an evening class so I could present my final project but all the trains were messed up and I had to walk there in the end through the rainâ you sniffed and when you looked at him you knew he knew what night you were talking about. âIt took me just under an hour and I was late in the end so I got docked points and had to make it up with some extra credit but I called you. I called you and you said you were sorry but you were stuck in an important meeting and you couldnât get out of itâ you hiccuped and itâs like he didnât want to hear any more. His hands covering his eyes as he shook his head from side to side but you kept going. âBut then when I got home and I just wanted someone to talk to and rant to there were pictures of you plastered online with some random girl in your lap and I knew youâd lied to meâ
âIâm sorryâ he blubbed, looking up at you with red eyes and a wobbly bottom lip but even that didnât stop you from carrying on. The words pouring out from your mouth like a waterfall as years of hurt made their way to the surface.
âYou made me feel so worthless when Iâve stuck around since day dot. You always spout about his family is everything to you but I thought that included me? And I felt like I never meant a thingâ
âYou did- you do. You mean everything to me I swear. Please please donât say that it kills meâ he sobbed before finally reaching for you. Pulling you into his body and you let yourself hide in his neck as the tears fell from your eyes. âI was a dick for no reason and youâre the last person I should have taken anything out on. Youâre right, I was disgusting and I didnât care about anyone else and you were the first person I actually cared about who told me no and I couldn't take itâ
âYou really hurt meâ
âI know I did and I can't tell you how sorry I amâ he cried. âI know Iâm not easy to be around or easy to keep up with but youâve always been there and I took you for granted. I honestly didnât see what I was doing wrong cause no one ever told me, like everyone just let me do what I wanted but I get it now, I really do. I was just so caught up in having a good time and not thinking about the consequences so I took things too far. I know Iâm probably out of second chances but I need to ask again cause I canât lose youâ
Your silence was deafening for him and you knew he wanted some sort of answer from you. Eventually sitting up and making you look at him and even though he looked panicked his voice was calm as he carried on speaking.
âIâm a fuck up okay? I know I am and I know the last thing you probably want or need is me coming back into your life to cause you more stress again but this massive fuck up has misssd you so so muchâ
You couldnât stop the little chuckle that fell from your lips. The sound making him smile too before he took your hands in his.
âIâm sorry for embarrassing you, Iâm sorry for all the lies Iâve told and all the horrible shit Iâve said about you and Iâm sorry for the constant 8am wakeup calls on a Saturday cause I canât control myself. I know how to behave and I know what I need to do so Iâll just do it yeah? No more calling you up to kick girls out for me cause they wonât be there in the first place. You need me and Iâll do whatever I can to get there for you and do exactly what you do for me everyday. These few weeks without you have been awful and Iâm sorry it took us getting to this point to make me see but Iâd rather get rid of everyone in my circle if it meant I got to keep youâ he confirmed as he squeezed your hands a bit tighter. âWhat do you say, huh? Do you think we could work something out?â
âI mean, youâre right. It probably is the last thing I needâ you started, watching his head sink as his eyes fell to his lap but you just considered it a tiny bit of payback for now. âBut I canât lie and say that I havenât missed you too,â you told him. Voice wobbling at the end as your emotions took over and you could see he was also finding it hard to take. âBut I miss the old Mason, I miss my friendâ
âIâm still here I promise. Just give me a chance and Iâll show you Iâm still in hereâ
âPlease donât make me regret itâ you whispered but you didnât have a chance to say anything else. Mason bundling you into his arms and the feeling of his arms around you settled you more than anything else had and when he pulled back to smile at you, you felt your heart flutter in your chest. âJust because youâve apologised doesnât mean things can go back to the way they were. I might need some timeâ
âI know, I donât want that either. Iâm gonna prove to you how much Iâve changed and weâll go at your pace. I just needed to apologise and thatâs whether you accepted it or not, but I really would love it if you didâ
âI doâ you told him, your face crumpling once again but he was quick to wrap you up and comfort you once again.
Over the next few weeks he was an angel, giving you the space you needed but also checking in when he could. Things felt normal but so different at the same time and the relief of having your friend back was overwhelming. It was two weeks later when you next saw him in person though, Mason messaging you early Friday evening to see what you were up to the next day but you werenât expecting his response.
The fact he was offering to drive was tempting. You hated lugging heavy bags on the train and the fact the prospect of food was involved was even more appealing but you hadnât hung out like this in a long time even before your big fight. Mostly because he was always busy but also because youâd just silently grown apart in that way. Mason liked getting his own way and him doing things for other people didnât fall into that category.
You had a lot to do and the last thing you needed was him getting bored and rushing you round before spending an afternoon with him trying to annoy you. You knew it was mean but you wanted to put him off a little bit so you could shop in peace but you didnât want him to think you were still mad at him and didnât want to hang out.
His message made your heart sink. He really was trying and you knew he wanted more opportunities to prove himself but before you could think about it anymore he was messaging you again to try and convince you even more and you couldnât deny him this time.
When 9 rolled around the next morning he was there. Standing by his car as he opened the door for you after a quick hug and you promised yourself youâd try and be positive about today and give him a chance to prove himself if thatâs what he really wanted.
âYou eaten?â He asked as you got bucked in, knowing how hungry you got in the mornings but you always prioritised sleep over eating. You had a little bit of extra time today though so you nodded your head at him but didnât miss how his face dropped slightly.
âI had some toastâ
âOh okay, I um⊠I picked you up one of those juices you like and a pastry but if you donât want it thatâs fineâ he mumbled, looking slightly embarrassed and you felt your heart race at how thoughtful heâd been.
âOh⊠oh no Iâll have it. You know what Iâm like, always starvingâ you laughed, accepting the little bag and juice heâd picked you up with a smile and you could see how shy he looked. An expression he didnât usually wear and his soft smile made your heart flutter in your chest. âThank you, Maseâ
âItâs okayâ he whispered, starting the car so he could look away from you and even though the drive was fairly silent with just the low sound of his music playing, you didnât feel awkward.
âYou coming then?â You asked as he finished parking, watching his smile light up his face knowing you werenât going to leave him to sit in the car on his own before he nodded enthusiastically at you.
âSo this trip, is it the usual?â He asked as you made your way into the main shopping centre and you knew he was referring to where you were going as you visited your auntie in Spain every year.
âYeah, itâs just for a few days this time but I really need the breakâ you explained and he nodded at you knowingly.
You went to Boots first, Mason holding the basket for you as he followed behind and you filled it with everything you needed. You were about halfway round the shop when you realised something was different, Mason not questioning why you needed everything you put in the basket or making stupid jokes. If anything he was more than helpful, reaching the higher shelves for you and manoeuvring you around the busy aisles by your waist as he knew you hated the crowds.
When it came time to pay, he scanned everything for you while you packed the bag and when you were done he picked it up without any questions so you didnât have to carry it.
Next on your list was clothes. Wanting to try a few different things on to your usual so you could mix it up a bit and when you had an armful of things to try you turned to Mason with a smile.
âWill you come into the changing room with me?â
âWhat?â He choked, his eyes going wide immediately as the question sunk in but you just rolled your eyes as you tugged on his wrist.
âYeah I need your opinion and I canât be bothered to keep walking out here every time. Iâll go to one of the family ones so my arse isnât shoved in your face, don't worryâ you laughed, pushing him inside with you so he didnât have a choice but you could see the awkwardness on his face. Eventually shifting his eyes to the floor until you bundled him into a cubicle and made him sit on the seat in the corner.
âI um⊠what do I-i umâ he mumbled as he set the bags down and you couldnât help but giggle at his awkwardness. A side of him you hadnât seen in a while.
âOh come on, itâs not like youâve never seen me in my underwear beforeâ you laughed thinking back to when you were growing up and to even more recent times like when he showed up at your door and on nights out when he had to put you to bed after one too many but you could see he wasnât feeling a bit strange so you hung the dresses up on the rail and smiled at him reassuringly. âShut your eyes until I tell you to open them, yeah?â
âOkayâ he whispered. Shutting his eyes and covering them with his hands as you turned away and picked up the first dress.
It was nothing like you usually wore. Tight and short with a fully cut out back meaning you had to quickly take your bra off to try it on and the thought of wearing it outside these four walls terrified you but you were determined to push yourself out of your comfort zone.
âYou can open them now, what do you think?â You asked him, watching his eyes adjust to the light for a second before an unreadable emotion took over his face.
âOh itâs um⊠itâs differentâ he told you and you couldn't tell if he liked it or not.
âWell Iâve been thinking about what you said and even though I was pissed at the time and you could have probably worded it nicer I think you were rightâ you told him, hands brushing over the short skirt and even though you felt different in it you didnât feel too uncomfortable. âI need to show a bit more skin, you know?â
âWait-â
âWhat do boys like more? Bum or boobs? Like what do I need to-â
âWait, stopâ he interrupted, the tone of his voice making you stop in your tracks and turn to him and when he held his hand out to you, you took it carefully. Letting him pull you in between your legs slowly so he could talk to you better but when you felt his fingertips on the backs of your bare thighs your legs turned to jelly.
You didnât know what it was, that weird feeling pulsating through you at just a simple touch from Mason of all people and the sensation made it feel like you couldnât get your breath out properly. In the end you had to rest your hands on his chest so you didnât crumple to the floor and it was like the atmosphere changed within a heartbeat.
His big brown eyes looked dark as he peered up at you through his lashes, the bridge of his nose a deep red and his pouty lips had parted slightly as he tried to control his breathing but itâs like you blinked and the moment was gone. His eyes moving to look at your shoulder now and you moved your hands away from his chest to cross them over your body.
âSit down, yeah?â He whispered, nodding his head to his leg and you sat on his thigh as he caged you in his arms. His face serious as you wondered what he might be about to say to you and you could feel your cheeks getting warm as he looked at you in a way he never had before. âYou donât⊠you donât need to change the way you look or dress, okay? I was a dick and I shouldnât have said all that before. It was crap of me and it wasnât true anywayâ
âBut-â
âBut nothingâ he whispered, cutting you off and you felt your eyes sting as he smiled sweetly at you. âYou deserve the world, you know that? And you deserve a man who doesnât care about how much skin youâve got on show or what your body looks like in what youâve got on. You want a man who cares about whatâs going on in hereâ he whispered, tapping your temple lightly before doing the same to the top of your chest. âAnd in here. And yeah it might be a wait but youâll get there. You donât have to sell yourself short to dickheads like me who donât have what you need, okay?â
âIt just gets hard sometimesâ you sniffed, his words hitting you deep in your tummy and you couldnât stop the tears spilling from your eyes before you felt him pulling you into his body for a cuddle. Your head nestled into his neck as you held onto him for dear life but the feel of his hand stroking up and down your back bare soothed you ever so slightly.
âI know it doesâ
âWhatâs wrong with me?â You hiccuped, barely able to hold yourself together at this point but his gentle touches really were helping. You felt safe with him for the first time in a long time and you knew you could tell him anything and it wouldnât matter. Heâd listen and reassure you like best friends are supposed to.
âNothing, I promise. Absolutely nothing, youâre perfect okayâ he told you. Speaking the words directly into ear and he sounded so determined and sure of himself that the sound made you shiver. âYouâre too perfect, maybe thatâs the problem. It's dicks like me that have got something wrong with us yeahâ he laughed and you let out a little chuckle before pulling back so you could wipe your eyes. âDoes everything you picked out look like that?â
âYeahâ you laughed, smiling as he caught the tears you missed.
âOkay well let me go and look for you, I saw a few bits that are more you but just a bit different. You can try those on and see what you think, yeah?â
âOkayâ you sniffed, not sure about this idea but you were willing to entertain him at this point and when he came back with a few bits you were actually surprised at how much you loved them. Still your style but just a little different and you couldnât help but give Mason a massive hug at the end.
Once youâd paid, Mason offered to take all the bags back to the car whilst you popped into Primark for underwear and socks and once you were done you met him outside. Your tummy grumbling as it approached lunchtime and he let you pick wherever you wanted to go but you settled on Nandoâs as you knew thatâs secretly what he wanted and since heâd been good to you that morning you figured youâd be good to him.
You were back at his just after one, leaving your bags in the car but you noticed heâd taken in a white paper bag that you hadnât seen him with all day and after the pair of you got yourselves a drink and settled on the sofa, he turned to you with a shy smile.
âHey, so I got you somethingâ he told you nervously, producing the white paper bag from earlier from the side of the sofa and you took it from him with a confused grin.
You didnât ask what it was, just reached in to grab hold of the box and when you finally pulled it out you almost lost your breath. The brightly coloured picture of the northern lights making you smile immediately before you looked up to his nervous face.
âI wanted to get you one we could maybe do together? I know itâs probably not as big or complicated as youâre used to but I thought we could start me off easyâ he laughed but you were too overcome with emotion to think of anything to say. Never in a million years did you think heâd want to do a puzzle with you let alone buy you one with a picture of the place youâd always wanted to visit the most on it.
âCan we do it now?â You asked excitedly. Knowing you had the whole afternoon together to finish it and when his face mirrored yours you felt like jumping up and down.
âOf courseâ he grinned. âIâll clear the coffee table and we can do it there if thatâs alright?â
âThat's perfectâ you nodded, hugging the box to your chest as you stood up before touching his arm gently so heâd look at you. âDo you mind if I borrow something to wear? I like to be comfy when Iâm getting my puzzle onâ you laughed but he just smiled before motioning to follow you to his room. Picking you out a few things to choose from and you settled on a pair of his grey shorts and an oversized T-shirt of his before taking a hoodie down with you just in case you got cold.
Mason got changed too just after you before running into the kitchen to get you both some snacks and drinks whilst you cleared the table and soon enough you were tipping the contense of the box onto the table so you could get started.
âRight what do we do?â Mason questioned, the large pile of tiny pieces daunting him quite clearly but you just giggled as you took a seat opposite him.
âWell Iâll tell you how I do it, so we need to find the corner pieces first, then the edges then weâll sort the leftovers out by colour and go from there. That sound good?â
âOkayâ he nodded and you gave him the task of the corners and edges whilst you organised the rest. Only realising then how much of a difficult one this one might be. He was right in saying it was less pieces than you were used to but the picture was complicated and once heâd got all his pieces sorted he looked at you with a confused smile.
âYou realise this is gonna be difficult? And we could be here for a whileâ You told him, watching him gulp nervously before looking back at all the pieces.
âReally? But itâs only 500 pieces. The ones you do are thousandsâ
âYeah but the picture here is complicated, it's just all random colours like thereâs no buildings or anything to work fromâ
âOh, shit sorryâ he laughed before shrugging at you. âI just know youâve always wanted to go so I thought youâd like itâ
âNo donât be sorry, I do like it. Love it, in fact. I just donât want you to get bored or frustrated with it if it takes a whileâ
âNo itâs okay, I can do itâ he told you. The same determined look youâd seen in his eyes countless times before important games and finals and it made you smile that he was applying the same fight for this.
You let him put some background music on as you worked away. Talking lightly about some plans you both had coming up but it was difficult for Mason to multitask. You could see he was trying his best and had done a lot of work in one of the corners but he couldnât puzzle and talk like you could and you thought his concentrated face was cute. Often finding yourself just watching him for a few moments until he caught you and sent you a lopsided smile as he blushed.
You ordered food in when the time came. Taking a small break so you could reevaluate how much youâd done before jumping back in and it was approaching 9pm when you finally finished. Mason giving you the last piece to place in as he knew it was your favourite bit before you cheered and wrapped your arms around his shoulders.
âNot bad for something dorks do, huh?â You giggled but it was like he was frozen. His gaze all over your face before a look of guilt washed over his.
âYou know I never thought you were a dorkâ he gulped, wrapping his arms around you tighter and pulling you further into his lap.
âMase itâs fine-â
âNo, cause itâs notâ he shrugged. âI never meant it in a malicious way but even playing itâs still not nice so Iâm sorryâ
âThank youâ whispered and after he gave you a quick smile he was looking down at his lap shly again.
âItâs kinda late, do you maybe wanna stay over? We can have a sleepover like we used toâ he winked and while the idea sounded fun you were also a little unsure.
âI donât wanna sleep in your sex bedâ you laughed and the shocked expression on his face made you giggle.
âHey, you think I let just anyone go in there? He laughed. âI donât take random girls in there, I take them to the loft room. Well I did at least, I havenât done that in a whileâ
âWhy not?â
âDunno, just not in the mood? Been too busy begging for your forgivenessâ he teased before his eyes were boring into yours. âPlease stayâ
âOkayâ you whispered, slightly thankful heâd asked as you didnât fancy the drive home this late. You were already sleepy and when he tucked you in next to him after heâd put a movie on it didnât take you long to fall asleep.
The pair of you joked the next morning about who he would call to come and kick you out and you hadnât felt this normal with him in years. Your Mason was back and you couldnât be more thankful but again over the next few weeks his behaviour began to change.
It seemed to be going the opposite way though, Mason swapping his devil horns for angel wings and it was like he was getting sweeter by the second.
Every morning you woke up to a good morning text, and every evening heâd text you goodnight. Messaging you throughout the day when he could and even though it was always silly conversations it was like heâd made it his mission to make you smile whenever he could. He was being the best friend he could be and so much more but it was like he was changing his whole life for the better. No more random nights out so he could trap a girl and take her home, no more mean jokes at your expense and you hadnât heard about his gaggle of yes men in weeks.
You spent all of your free time together. No matter what you were doing or how boring you thought he might have found it he wanted to be there doing it with you.
You knew Mason was always touchy with everyone but heâd never been the same with you. A hand on your shoulder maybe but that was it, however now he couldnât seem to keep his hands away from you now. Always standing next to you when he could, his hands on your waist or you back or his fingers threaded through yours as you sat and watched tv.
You could feel things changing but you werenât sure what it was. Wondering if he was just happy you were back but you needed an explanation for the puppy eyes he was sending your way every five seconds that you didnât understand.
You waited until youâd been to his for dinner one night, letting him load the dishwasher as you got comfortable on the sofa and once he was done he flopped down with his head in your lap as a content hum fell from his lips.
âWhatâs gotten into you lately?â You laughed, massaging his head slightly as he nestled into your lap even further but the action just made you laugh until he was rolling onto his back and looking up at you with a smile that made his eyes crease.
âWhat do you mean?â
âWell I know I said I wanted the old Mason back but this is something elseâ you winked and you could see his cheeks flush as you called him out for his actions.
âWell I want you to like meâ he shrugged, sitting up and taking your hand in his and even though he was shy you kept pressing him in hope of some answers.
âYouâre my best friend Mason, of course I like youâ
âWhat if I more than like you?â He whispered, so quietly you thought you hadnât heard it but when your eyes met his you knew heâd said what you thought he had.
âI donât understandâ
âI donât either reallyâ he laughed, sitting up taller so he could face you and you felt your heart race at what he might be saying. âAll I know is that things have changed for me and I feel like I need you to know how I feel. Itâs fine if you donât feel it too but Iâve just been feeling these things for you for a few weeks and youâre the person I tell everything to so I feel like Iâve got to tell you nowâ
âWhat things are you feeling?â You asked. Wondering if youâd maybe got the wrong end of the stick but his next sentence took the breath out of your lungs.
âIm feeling like I wanna kiss youâ he whispered, barely able to hear him but you knew what heâd said.
What?
You couldnât speak, and by the looks of it Mason knew he had to keep speaking so you let him squeeze you hand as he word vomited everything heâd been holding in.
âI just keep having these moments with you, like time stops and Iâm in this trance and all I can focus on you and wanting you in a way Iâve never done before. Remember when we did that puzzle? You put that last piece in and you were just so happy like I swear to god all I wanted to was kiss your face offâ he laughed but you couldnât believe what he was saying. Not sure how to react as no one had ever said anything like this to you let alone your best friend.
âMase I- I donât think I-â
âItâs okayâ he smiled. âI said itâs fine if you donâtâ he smiled and even though him saying it made you feel better, you could tell he was a little embarrassed. Wondering if you should make a joke to ease the tension and as he looked away you began to speak without even thinking.
âI know you said you werenât in the mood for girls but you must be really desperate if youâre thinking about kissing meâ you laughed, trying to ease the tension slightly but he just smiled at you and shrugged.
âI wouldn't go that far. But itâs honestly fine, weâve been spending a lot of time together and Iâve probably got all mixed up. Iâm sure itâs just a phase and itâll passâ he laughed. âJust forget it, itâs fine and I donât want things to be weirdâ
But how could you forget?
No one in your entire existence had ever admitted having feelings for you. It was something you never thought would happen yet here was your best friend telling you he felt like he wanted to kiss you.
It was like a switch had suddenly gone off in your brain, over the coming weeks finding yourself daydreaming about kissing him too and what it might be like to be his girl. Thinking about how his hand would feel clasped in your own, his fingers linked in between yours or just how his touch would feel anywhere and everywhere on your body.
You shook yourself out of it at first, like you were waking yourself up from a nightmare and you couldnât comprehend how your brain had conjured up such a strange image but as the days went on you basked in it. Giggling as you dreamed about all the things you could do together and how happy you could be.
The pair of you had always been platonic, and whilst lately the lines maybe had become a bit blurred as he became touchier with you with the added time you spent together, your thoughts about him lately were anything but platonic.
Everytime you shut your eyes all you could see was his soft smile and the way his eyes creased at the sides so adorably. The dimple on his cheek made your heart race and all you could think about was taking him up on his offer and planting your lips on his. It wasnât just his smile though, it was everything. His chocolate chip eyes you wanted to drown in, his smell that made you feel like home and his arms that made you feel safer than anything else.
Everything seemed to be hitting you like a truck and you felt ridiculous. Waiting for his name to pop up on your phone constantly and the butterflies only intensified with each new message. Finding yourself sat giggling in anticipation of what he was going to say next and going to bed with a huge smile on your face every night.
You never meant to fall for him, much like he probably never meant to fall for you, but it had happened and you didnât know what to do with yourself. Feeling like a schoolgirl with your first crush and the fact you knew it was reciprocated somewhat excited you and filled you with dread at the same time.
The more you thought about him, the sillier you started to feel. He never offered to be your boyfriend, never said anything about dates or anything extra. Heâd said he wanted to kiss you, and that was it.
The words just a phase rang through your ears constantly and as the days went by you realised you didnât want to be just a phase to him. Disappointment flooding you at him trying his best to curb his feelings whilst yours only grew for him.
Youâd noticed heâd pulled back from you a little bit, trying his hardest not to talk to you every minute of the day but you didnât let him ignore you for too long. Now you were in your feels all you could think about was him and when you might next get to see him. Not wanting to look too eager and alert him to the fact anything had changed but when he text you one evening you felt your excitement levels rise.
You decided to wear one of the dresses heâd picked out for you for your holiday and gave yourself enough time to do your makeup nicely and straighten your hair. You didn't know why you wanted to, or maybe you did, but it was the first night out where he wasnât trying to set you up with one of his friends and you felt more relaxed about it. That was until he text you that he was on his way and you felt like throwing up.
It's like the words were stuck in his throat as soon as he saw you, frozen to the spot as you locked your door behind you and you could see him visibly gulp as he tried to shake it off and say hello to you properly.
It was one of the weirdest nights out youâd ever been on, the pair of you turning up together and he led you to your section by your hand. Once heâd found you both seats next to each other he was off to the bar to get you a drink with his eyes not leaving you for me more a few moments before he was back with you.
Things only got weirder though as he paid no attention to any of the girls looking his way, not even engaging in conversation with most of the girls the boys would introduce to him and when you tried to question him about it he just shrugged and said he wasnât in the mood.
âHey y/n, have you met Ethan?â Woody asked as he nodded someone over. A tall guy with dark hair and bright blue eyes making his way over to you and you rolled your eyes at his clear attempt to set you up with another one of his friends after youâd told him to stop but the feeling of Mason dropping your hand from under the table that made you turn away to look back at him.
He didnât say anything, just gave you what looked like a sad smile before you had to turn back to say hello to Ethan. Woody banging on about how he came from Portsmouth just like you and Mason and how theyâd gone to primary school together but now Ethan was in the Navy hence why youâd never seen him but he was back for a little while to visit.
You didnât know what possessed you to do it, but you felt weird now Mason's hand wasnât in yours. Looking down to see it was resting on his thigh so as carefully and as sneakily as you could you laced your fingers back through his and squeezed it gently. Not acknowledging him in any way but you could see his head snap up to look at you from the corner of your eye before his other hand fell over your clasped ones. Fiddling with your rings as the others spoke and you tried not to smile at how adorable he was being.
All the thoughts youâd had about having more with Mason that week, he was making a reality tonight. Giving you glimpses of what it might be like to to be his and how he might treat you but you were still so unsure as to what he wanted as he told you he was just a phase he was getting over so you played dumb for little.
âYou wanna dance?â You asked him, tugging on his hand gently but he just scrunched his face up slightly.
âIâm good, you go Iâll watch youâ he smiled and whilst the thought of him watching you dance thrilled you a little bit, you also could tell he wasnât on his a game and looked like he didnât even want to be there at all anymore.
âAre you okay? You donât seem as into it as usualâ
âIâm fineâ he shrugged âDunno just not in the mood to be around loads of people i guessâ
âWe can leave if you want? I mean itâs way past my bedtime anywayâ
âWe can, but Iâve got one conditionâ he told you with a smile, leaning closer so he could talk right in your ear and you felt every hair in your body stand to attention.
âWhatâs that?â
âCome stay at mine?â He whispered and his offer made you freeze. âIâll make you breakfast in the morningâ
âOkayâ you whispered, letting him take your hand and lead you out but you were surprised he didnât want to say goodbye to anyone first. Only giving Woody a quick wave who gave the pair of you a look you couldn't quite make out before you were jumping in a cab back to his.
Part of you was happy he wanted to get home earlier than usual, it had been a long week and once you were changed into an oversized T-shirt of his you got settled on your side of his bed. Hazily watching him slip under the covers in just a pair of boxers as you tried to hide a smile and thankfully he didnât catch it.
âGo to sleep love, you look exhaustedâ he laughed, tucking the duvet around you a little more tightly. âIâve just got a few emails to look through okay but Iâll be quiteâ
âThatâs fine, Night Maseâ
âNight loveâ he whispered and you turned onto your side away from him so you could get comfy and hopefully drift off soon.
Your whole body felt like a dead weight, your eyes feeling like theyâd been stuck together with glue but your mind wouldnât shut off and you knew you would be thinking about Mason and replaying most of the night youâd just spent together. Remembering the way he held your hand, held your waist and spoke directly into your ear like you were his made your spine tingle. But the memories were soon becoming warped and disfigured as your brain became tired and you eventually let the sleep take you.
You hadn't been asleep long, but the feeling of Mason's arm sliding around your waist as he cuddled up to you woke you slightly. Not enough to wake you up fully and the warmth of his body pressed against yours was already sending you back to sleep so you just went with it and let him hold you. Revelling in the soft kisses he was pressing to your shoulder as you tried not to smile but you definitely weren't ready for what was about to happen next.
âWhat am I gonna do with you, eh?â He whispered, only just loud enough for you to hear but you knew you shouldnât be. He obviously thought you were still asleep and couldnât hear him so you stayed as still as you could and kept your breathing steady in hopes heâd carry on. âIâd do absolutely anything for you, you know that? And Iâm really trying to get over you but you make it so difficultâ
I donât want you to get over me was the first thought in your head but you didnât vocalise it. You wanted him to keep talking, to see what else he could admit to your semi unconscious state and luckily enough for you he kept going.
âI know I said it was just a phase but Iâm not so sure it is now. Youâre the only person who knows the real me and wants whatâs best for me. I canât get you out of my headâ
You waited for more, but it never came. Soon enough his soft snores filled the room and you knew he was asleep but his admissions were enough for you. You knew how he felt, and you were pretty sure you felt the same now but you werenât sure if you had the balls to do anything about it right now so you followed his lead and shut your eyes so you could let the sleep take you again.
Mason was still asleep when you awoke. The pair of you facing each other as youâd turned in your sleep and you used the time he was asleep just to look at him. His pouty lips and pink cheeks made your tummy flutter and after what youâd heard last night all you could think about is what to say to him this morning.
He didnât give you too much longer to think about it though and you felt your heart thump as he stirred awake. His eyes opening softly as they latched onto yours but his expression remained unchanged asides from a small smile. Just looking back at you as you did the same to him and a sense of peace washed over you.
The pair of you were both on the edge of your own respective pillows, as close as you could be without touching one another but the moment felt intimate and you could see the love in his eyes for you as you watched each other bathed in the early morning sun. The light bringing out the golden tones in his hair and the honey hues in his eyes, it hitting you right there that your best friend was probably the most gorgeous boy youâd ever laid eyes on.
You both didnât move for a while. Content with just looking at the person in front of you and thinking how thankful you were that you got a chance to wake up next to them and you knew this was only ending one way. You were nervous to say the least, but after everything youâd heard last night you were pretty sure you were on the same page and heâd welcome what you were about to give him.
It was you that made the first move. Not even sure as to why you did it but you lent forward slowly, watching how his body mirrored your own as you kept going and both your eyes snapped away from one another. Focusing on the others lips now and just as your hand reached out to touch his chest for a bit of support, your lips finally locked and his hand cupped your jaw immediately.
It wasnât a soft kiss like you thought it might be, Mason stole the breath from your lungs as soon as it hit him what was happening. Pushing himself forward so he could hover over you and control the kiss a bit more but you moved your hand to the back of his head so he wouldnât part from you.
Your tummy was erupting with butterflies, your chest heaving as he slipped his tongue in your mouth and you couldnât help but press yourself into him further. Letting him grip your thigh as he hitched it up his body and you were quite happy to get lost in him but it was Mason that pulled back. Kissing over your cheeks until you were giggling and when he eventually pulled back his smile made your heart melt.
He was quick to settle back down next to you. Pulling your body right up against his and keeping your thigh wrapped around his waist before you felt his hand on your lower back so he could tickle your skin lightly.
âSorryâ you whispered, suddenly feeling embarrassed about what youâd done but his gentle smile relaxed you.
âDonât be, I donât mindâ he smiled. Pecking your lips again softly and you knew you were blushing. âYou know Iâve been wanting to kiss for a while but I didnât wanna push things too farâ he smiled âand itâs not that I donât want to ever, but I donât want you to regret anything right nowâ
âI wouldnât haveâ you whispered, watching his face soften slightly but deep down you knew it was for the best. You still didnât know what any of this meant and it was clearly obvious to Mason you were worried as he brushed some strands of hair out of your face and gave you a sympathetic smile.
âWhat is it, love? Whatâs on your mindâ
âI just⊠Iâm not sure, like what does all of this mean?â You breathed. Watching his eyes light up as you finally spoke your mind. âYour my best friend Mason, I donât want to lose youâ
âYou wonâtâ
âBut I need to know what you want. Is it just a kiss? Like are we done now?â You laughed, trying to keep it light as it was a pretty serious conversation but the smile on his face relaxed you.
âNo, Iâm definitely not done with youâ he told you sincerely. âI get us being friends complicates things a little bit but Iâm not the guy you think I am, not anymore at least anyway and definitely not when it comes to youâ
âI feel like Iâm not enough for youâ you whispered, finally addressing the elephant in the room and you could tell your words had upset him a little bit. The frown on his face was adorable but you wanted him to know how you felt no matter how awful it sounded.
âDonât say thatâ he huffed, kissing your jaw gently. âTell me why so I can tell you itâs rubbishâ
âNo because what if I canât give you everything those other girls have?â You laughed even though you were trying to be serious. âLike I don't wanna be a dick but youâve always said youâd never be a one woman guy so whatâs changed. What if your eyes wander somewhere else? What do I do then?â
You didnât mean for it to come out so abruptly but Mason knew you never minced your words and didnât take it too badly. He knew his past and he owned it but he also knew it was his feelings for you that had changed him and he was willing to say whatever he could to get you on board.
âRemember the day we did the puzzle together, and I said I hadnât slept with anyone in a while cause I wasnât in the mood? Well that wasnât the reason. I didn't know it then fully but I hadnât because all I wanted was you and the thought of being with anyone else made me feel weirdâ he told you. His fingers delicately tracing patterns on your back as he spoke and you knew you were hanging off his every word. âAt first I thought it was because I missed us being together and I wanted to spend more time with you, but then I wanted to spend all my time with you. My eyes arenât gonna wander okay? They havenât in months and why would they when youâre the most beautiful girl Iâve ever seenâ
âYouâre just saying thatâ you whispered, not used to compliments like that coming from him and your instincts were to think he was lying but you could see in his eyes something had changed.
âDonât tell me what I thinkâ he teased, squeezing your sides gently. âIâve always thought you were pretty, why do you think I could never understand that you were single?â
âMase Iâve never⊠Iâve never done any of this. Youâre the first boy whoâs ever admitted to feeling anything more than friendship with me. I donât know what to doâ
âYou donât have to do anything, we donât have to do anything okay? Nothing has to change. I just wanna hold you more, kiss you more maybe if thatâs something youâd wantâ
âIâve never had sexâ you blurted and the confession made him chuckle. Clearly he knew this already but you just wanted him to be certain of what he was getting himself into.
âThatâs fineâ he whispered, pulling you in a little closer. âI know youâre scared, okay? This is different for me too. Iâve never had a proper girlfriend before, I mean Iâve dated girls and been exclusive with a couple but never got to the official stage. Iâve never wanted that from anyone but I want it from you. If thatâs what you wantâ
âI think I do, Iâm justâŠâ
âWhat?â He whispered, a look of love and reassurance on his face and you felt your eyes sting at how safe you felt with him.
âIâm fucking terrifiedâ you laughed. âI know Iâve been trying to find someone but I never thought it would be youâ
âWell I didnât think Iâd fall for you eitherâ he winked before placing a soft kiss to your lips that made you melt into the sheets. âWe donât have to stick a big label on it or anything, we can just hang out like we have been and see what comes natural to us okay? And if itâs sex your worried about then I donât care about waitingâ
âI donât wanna be bad for youâ
âYou wonât be, not when youâve got me for a teacher anywayâ he joked and you rolled your eyes before his face got serious. âI know youâre scared but you know you can trust me don't you? I wanna be the one to show you, to make you feel good. I wanna be the one you trust to show you how good it can beâ he whispered and you felt your skin tingle all over at his words. âBut weâll wait until youâre ready cause thereâs a million things we need to do before we get thereâ
âSo Iâm not just a phase then?â
âNot at allâ he laughed, âand I never thought you were. I could just tell you didnât feel the same when I told you how I felt and I was trying to make you feel betterâ Heâd explained. âI couldn't go three weeks without you, gorgeous. And I knew Iâd fucked up the next day but I was too much of a dick to do anything about it until I couldnât cope without you anymoreâ
âSo.. youâre looking for a relationship then?â You asked, wanting everything out on the table so you could both be certain about what was going on and you watched his face soften at you as he bit his lip nervously.
âI wasnât, you know Iâve never cared about that stuff but youâve made me care. I want to do all that stuff with you. Iâm done messing people around okay I just want youâ
âI want you tooâ you whispered, finally admitting it out loud and you felt the weight of the world lift off of you.
âYeah? I thought you didnâtâ
âSo did I, but ever since you told me how you felt I havenât been able to stop thinking about us. Its like you tapped into this weird part of my brain that thinks about you in ways I never have beforeâ
âYouâve finally fallen victim to my mind controlâ he teased and you only had a second to smile before his lips were on yours again. Hot and heavy as you wrapped yourselves around each other and you realised kissing Mason was better than you ever imagined. You just hoped you could somehow make him feel the same one day but when Mason pulled back and rested his forehead on yours, his eyes told you all you needed to know.
âSo if youâve never had sex and never had a boyfriend, was that your first kiss?â He asked quizzically, a spark of hope in his eyes that he could kiss you like no one else had but unfortunately you had to burst his bubble just a tiny bit.
âYouâd think it would be but no it wasnâtâ you giggled and he looked at you in deep confusion. âYou remember Scott from school? Scott Grey?â You asked and he nodded his head in confusion. âWell technically he was my first kissâ
âYou what?â
âOh yeahâ you laughed, laying on your back as he pushed you back slightly and you could see the jealousy written all over his face. 'He took me round the back of the science building after school once to show me his new tamagotchi. Asked if Iâd liked to be its mum before planting one on me and then never spoke to me againâ
âWhy didnât you tell me? I would have kicked his dick offâ he told you, brows pinched as you could tell how annoyed he was with him but you were quick to hold his face and kiss his nose.
âFirst of all, no you wouldnât have. He was twice your size and his dad was on the school board so you could have been kicked out. And secondly I never told you cause youâve never askedâ
âIâve been pretty rubbish havenât Iâ he huffed, it suddenly hitting him that he simultaneously knew everything about you but also nothing at all but the way you stroked his cheek let him know everything was okay.
âIf it makes you feel any better, you were my first proper kiss. Iâve never kissed anyone like that beforeâ
âThat does make me feel betterâ he chuckled. Getting himself settled next to you again before he pulled you into his chest. âWhat about dates?â
âIâve been on a coupleâ
âWhen was the last one?â
âLike two months ago? A few days after we had our big argumentâ
âWhat?â He laughed, tickling your sides until you giggled but you fought him off eventually.
âAfter I called you a dick and left the club that night, Olivia took me to a party at some guys from works house. I got talking to one of his friends and we went out on a date a few days after but it was actually me that wasnât feeling it and I told him I didn't see things going anywhereâ
âWhat was wrong with him?â He asked quietly but that was the issue. There was nothing wrong with him at all.
âJust didnât feel what I thought I should have felt you know?â You whispered and you saw Mason nod gently with a smile on his lips. âI know Iâve never been in that situation or felt those things before but I told myself when I did eventually find someone I wouldnât settle for just anyone. I want fireworks and warmth and all those things you read aboutâ
âDo you feel it now?â He whispered, his eyes searching your face erratically almost as if he was scared of your answer but little did he know he had no reason to be.
âI do, yeahâ
The relieved breath that fell from Mason's lips made you smile wider than you had in a while. His own face mirroring yours just as he planted another heavy kiss on your lips before trailing his kissed down your jaw and neck and you knew you had to try and distract him before you both ended up in a compromised position.
âMason?â You gasped, hearing him chuckle against your skin and even though he stopped his attack with his lips you felt him nestle into you with a content hum that made you pull him in closer.
âYes love?â He spoke against your neck, the vibrations travelling over every inch of your skin and you had to hold in your gasp at the feel of it.
âYou promised me breakfastâ you whispered and that was all it took for him to pull up and look at you with his usual cheeky smile.
âI did, didn't Iâ he laughed. Gently brushing a few strands of hair out of your face. âHow do pancakes sound?â
âIt sounds like you want me to make breakfastâ you pouted, watching him nod at you enthusiastically before he was trying his hardest to pull you away from the warmth and safety of the duvet.
âI love how you get me. Come on, Iâll assist youâ he confirmed and you didnât have it in you to argue. Letting him pull you up so you could stand in front of him and when you felt his hands dangerously low on your back you smiled up at him cheekily. âThank you for giving me a shot, I know I donât deserve oneâ
âYou better make it worth my while then, Mountâ you teased but no more words needed to be said. You could see it in his eyes he was ready to make things as good for the pair of you as he could so you let him lead you downstairs by the hand to start the next part of your journey together.
Well done if you made it đ€ thank you so so much for reading and Iâd love some feedback if you fancy it đ xxx
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A part of you, a part of me
Summary: Joelâs been down this road before, heâs seen all the signs, and he knows before you ever do that youâre pregnant.
Warning: 18+ Minors DNI. Smut, unplanned pregnancy, crying, fluff, pre-outbreak Joel. Established relationship, cream pie, pet names, cussing, pregnancy tests, just a bunch of happiness because thatâs all Joel deserves in this world. đđ
A/n: I canât say Joel has a breeding kink⊠but I can certainly say he makes me have one đ
Joel Miller Master List
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Joel remembers everything from Sarahâs motherâs pregnancy, all of the signs that lead up to them finding out. And surely enough it was beginning to show in you.
It started one autumn morning, when he woke up to find you nestled in beside him, face pressed into his chest, snoring slightly, hair in disarray. You were the picture perfect definition of someone getting the best sleep of their lives.
The only reason it concerned his was the fact that you never slept in past 6. You were always up before Joel, making breakfast for him and Sarah and more often than not Tommy, taking Sarah to school with a sweet kiss to his lips before youâd dash off to work yourself.
Brushing the hair from your face he whispers softly, âHoney?â You grumble something unintelligible, pulling a smile from him. âHoney itâs 7:20.â Youâre slow to open your eyes, hazy and still leaded with sleep as they focus in on him, his dark hair sticking up around his head like every morning, âYou okay?â
âMâ just really tired⊠think you can take over this morning?â You whisper, reaching up and cupping his cheek, the stubble of his beard scratching your palm.
âOf course baby. You need me to call work? Want a day to relax?â You smile at his concern, knowing heâs already gearing himself to go the extra mile to make sure you start to feel better.
âThat would be really nice.â He kisses your lips gently before leaving you to sleep in, and you end up sleeping most of the day away.
Joelâs quick to notice that you start to get more tired as the days progress, usually a morning person you were now sluggish and downing two cups of coffee just to stay alert, youâd stay in bed a little longer and go to sleep a little earlier.
Initially heâd chalked it up to being stress at work, you were an associate for a designer company, making all the hotels and houses around here âfancy lookingâ as he would say. It was a big, busy job that you were very passionate about.
But then came the emotions and cravings, not anger or frustration like Sarahâs mother, but you cried, and you cried a lot. The alarm bells should of gone off when he found you one night in the kitchen after everyone had gone to bed. You were sitting at the counter crying, no you had been sobbing, and Joel feared the worst until you blubbered out that you just really, really wanted ice cream.
Him finding you like that only embarrassed you more, adding to the water works as he dragged you in for a tight hug, smoothing his hands up and down your back.
âI-I think Iâm just PMSing.â You hiccuped bashfully, hiding your face against his chest as he kissed the brown of your head.
âItâs okay, we will go get some tomorrow, itâs Saturday and we can take Sarah with us to the little parlor in town.â
Two months in to your sudden changes is when it all came to a head, he wasnât being nosy, had actually just walked into the house about to announce himself when he heard you on the phone.
âI donât know Jenny, works been stressful, I definitely havenât been eating right and I just donât have the energy to go to the gym like I use to. Hell even my periods plying hide and seek with me. I thought about making a doctors appointment-â
Whatever else you say is lost on him as he stops dead in his tracks, his muscles tensing and mouth drying up. He makes his legs move, taking him around the corner and into the kitchen. You donât notice him at first, giving him the perfect opportunity to just look at you, to really look at you.
At the sake of sounding corny⊠You really were glowing, face a little rounder, body filling out in different ways, curves softening under your clothing. The changes were slight, not so prominent yet, but he can see it.
His heart speeds up, emotions rolling through him like the ocean in a storm.
You are pregnant.
Walking closer he catches your attention, making you crack a wide smile that has his knees going weak. âHey, Jenny, Joel just got home Iâll talk to you later⊠love you too, bye.â
Setting the phone down, you go to stand but Joelâs in front of you, dropping to his knees and capturing your hips in his hands. You let out a startled yelp, hands coming to rest on his arms squeezing gently.
âAs adventurous as I am, I donât think the kitchen is t-.â
âWe need to talk.â His serious expression extinguishes your excitement, panic flashing through you instantly.
âWhatâs wrong? Is Sarah okay? Tommy?â
âYes, they are fine, we need⊠we need to talk about you.â
âMe? Honey Iâm fine, what do you mean?â Nervous laughter bubbles up in your throat, mind racing in every possible direction this conversation could go.
Joel rolls his lips together, glancing to your stomach then back to you. Your face is contorted with confusion, your grip tightening on his arms. âWhen⊠how long has it been since youâre last period?â
You scoff at his question, eyes rolling slightly as your posture relaxes. âBaby I donât know, I havenât been tracking it like I usually do. Between Carol and Tray calling out of work Iâve been given both of their projects to present, thatâs two on top of my other two. And -.â You roll your eyes, temper rising, âand get this, two of them are so within three hours of each other, now how in the world am I supposed to-.â
âDarlinâ.â Joel cuts off your rambling, one large hand shifting to your softer stomach, rubbing slow circles as he watches the confusion melt into realization and then back to panic as your eyes drop to your stomach.
âN-no⊠no Joel we.. we always use condoms.â
He gives you a look that says youâre lying through your teeth, which you are, there has been a few times over the past couple of months, after youâve both had one to many drinks where youâll wake up in the morning, slick between your thighs.
Joel watches your face pale, body shaking in his grasp and he pulls you a little closer with the hand on your hip. âHow long?â
Swallowing you finally look at his face, his eyebrows furrowed slightly, expression pinched with⊠worry? Upset? Is he scared? Your own fears rise eyes flicking between his and something in his chest cracks open at the look on your face.
âM-maybe two months⊠I-I really donât k-know.â
He nods, rubbing slow circles into your stomach, already knowing but needing to be sure. âLetâs take a trip to the store okay?â
*~*~*~*~*~*
Youâre both quiet sitting on Joelâs bed, two positive pregnancy tests laying in between you. You are fighting back tears, stiff and trembling, waiting on Joel to blow up.
Youâve only been dating for three years, kids have never been a topic of discussion seeing as Joel already has Sarah, heâs been through the baby phase. Then thereâs the fact you donât officially live with him, though youâre apartment in the city is only visited when you need to do laundry. Almost every moment of the day is in this house or at work⊠does that me this will change everything?
âIâm⊠Iâm so sorry Joel.â You finally whisper, fat tears rolling down your cheeks.â
âWhat?â
âI should⊠I should of been on the pill, I should of been more careful⊠I didnât mean to do this to you.â The absolute devastation in your voice makes Joel move, kneeling down in front of you like earlier, this time his hands are on your waist, thumbs stroking the sides of your changing belly.
âDonât you dare talk like that, you didnât do anything to me. Yes Iâm scared, Iâm scared shitless but fuck baby⊠Iâm over the moon.â Your watery eyes dart to his and heâs smiling, joy shining in his soft drown eyes making something inside your body relax for the first time in hours. âNow⊠I know-I know we didnât plan this but I mean⊠This is us. This right here.â He leans forward, pressing his lips to your stomach making you giggle breathlessly. âThis is a part of me and a part of you that⊠God itâs so wonderful and youâre so wonderful and I love you so much, I love this so much.â
Tears brim his own beautiful eyes, hands gently squeezing your sides, curling into the fabric of your tank top as he searches your tear streaked face. âYou my sweet girl, are going to be the most amazing mother.â
Whatever reservations, whatever doubts you were holding onto flood from your body with the shaky breath that escapes through your trembling lips, and without thought you lean down, capturing his lips in a kiss, one that pours every little emotion you donât know how to communicate into him.
Joel stands, lips never leaving yours and pushes you back gently onto the bed, fitting himself between your legs as the kiss slowly turns hungry. Youâre burning from the inside out, tears still escaping down your cheeks, as Joel settles himself over you, mindful of his weight.
âShhh donât cry honey.â He breaths, lips moving down to your jaw, working the skin with sloppy kisses.
You tilt your head back, body thrumming with sudden need. âH-happy tears.â You manage to squeak out, hands tugging at his t-shirt wantonly. âJoel⊠I want you, please I want you.â You beg, arching your back pressing your hips up against him searching for some form of friction.
âI know baby, just relax. Iâll take good care of you.â He mumbles against your throat, a hand finding your pajama shorts and tugging them down, exposing your bare cunt to the cold air. He sits back, pulling your shorts over your ankles with a low growl. âFuck baby, youâre so wet for me already.â Joel swipes a fingers through your folds, gathering your juices and circling your clit.
You whine into the air, closing your eyes as another pulse of arousal shoots through you, heart hammering against your ribs. âPlease⊠Donât tease me please.â The tears now streaming down your cheeks are out of desperation, your hands finding his belt and yanking at the worn leather.
Joel only chuckles with a shake his head, helping you unbuckle the belt and open his jeans, shoving them down far enough for his cock to spring free. You groan at the sight, letting your legs fall further open as you grab a fist full of his t-shirt pulling him to you.
âNeed my cock that bad baby? Canât wait any longer?â He groans as he runs the tip along your soaked folds, bumping your swollen bud making your hips jerk.
You shake your head, watching his cock as he slowly presses the head into your opening, your lip caught between your teeth.
âHey,â Joelâs fingers find your chin, lifting your gaze to his and he feels like he might blow his load then and there. Your eyes simmer with pure lust⊠pure list and want and love and your looking up at his through your long lashes making his breath hitch in his chest. âEyes on me when I fuck you, wanna see that pretty face when I make you cum.â
âY-Yes sir.â You nod weakly, head resting back on the pillows as you hook your ankles around his waist.
âWhat a good girl you are.â He slowly thrusts in, savoring how you stretch around him, always so tight and warm. A low moan falls from your lips, legs tightening around him encouraging him to go deeper and he obeys, sinking into you completely.
You both stay still for a moment, breaths labored and hearts pounding. Joel keeps himself propped up with one hand, the other pushing your shirt up just under your breasts, finding its place on your small bump.
Joel pulls out half way before sinking back in, moaning and closing his eyes briefly as he finds his pace, deep and slow making your eyes roll and body languid below his. You can feel each bump and ridge of his cock, rubbing your walls in just the right way that your orgasm builds quickly. âSo pretty, always wanted to put a baby in you, never thought Iâd get the chance.â Your pussy squeezes around him your soft whimpers follow. âYeah? You like that?â
âF-fuck⊠yes Joel⊠yes.â Your grip tightens on his shirt, anchoring yourself to him as pressure begins to build in the base of your spine.
His voice drops, the timbre in his drawl making your blood thick in your veins, head heavy and empty. âJust gonna have taâ keep you pregnant then, barefoot in ma kitchen, swollen with all my babies.â Joelâs thrusts speed up, his mental image of you driving him closer and closer to his own orgasm. âI need to feel you cum for me, cum on my cock baby.â
His fingers find your swollen clit, rubbing tight circles and you nearly scream, the pressure radiating out into your abdomen pulling your muscles tight. You nod feverishly, panting out some form of yess and please, teetering on the cusp of oblivion, just for him.
Joel groans, eyebrows drawn together and thrusts turning sloppy, he can feel your pussy spasming around him and he knows he wonât last much longer.
âLet it go baby, let it happen, cum on my dick like the good girl you are.â
And it snaps, the tension flooding from your body as your orgasm erupts, a silent scream forming your lips into that perfect O shape that Joel loves so much, and as your cunt clenches down on him he stills, rope after rope of thick cum painting your quivering walls. He moans loud and deep, a shudder raking through his body as his eyes close and he basks in the euphoria washing through him.
Your legs shake around his twitching hips, whining pitchy and out of breath and Joel finally moves his fingers from your sensitive clit, splaying his hand across your stomach.
âYouâre gonna be such a good mama.â
*~*~*~*~*~*
You both wait until after your first doctors appointment to tell Sarah and Tommy, over a lovely family meal.
âThis is so good.â Sarah mumbles out around a mouth full of homemade lasagna making everyone laugh.
âThank you, itâs my mamas recipe.â Joelâs eyes lock with yours, a smile tugging at his lips as your heart pounds in your ears, ready to spill the beans like youâve planted. âI hope one day I can pass it on to you and your little sibling.â
It takes Sarah a minute, but Tommy stops eating immediately, his eyes growing wide, head wiping up to look between you and his brother, the smile that spreads across his face makes your heart warm.
âOoo Iâd love to try and cook it with you some time, I like learning newâŠâ The realization dawns on her then, her jaw dropping open, shock taking over her expression and Joel canât help but laugh.
âReally?â Sarah turns to you, and youâre already nodding, tears filling your eyes at the same time hers do. âIâm going to be a sister?â
âOh honeyâŠâ Sheâs out of her chair and crashing into your open arms in an instant, crying against your chest as you bury your face into her curls, holding on tightly.
Tommy embraces Joel, patting his back roughly as Joel beams, watching his two girls over Tommyâs shoulder. This moment, this instances is all heâs ever dreamt of.
#joel miller x female reader#joel miller#smut#the last of us#joel miller the last of us#joel miller x reader#joel miller x y/n#apollyonsdarksecrets#pedro pascal#joel miller smut#the last of us smut#Joel Miller breeding#pregnancy#happy
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wait i sent a request like two days go where reader had a kid from a previous relationship would u mind writing it with Paige instead đ
Found Family (Paige Bueckers x OC)
summary: At 21, You are balancing motherhood and new love. After getting pregnant at 17, you co-parent with Caleb, Rya's mostly absent father. Now dating college basketball star Paige Bueckers, Paige steps up as a mother figure to Rya.Â
might make this a series đ«Ł like an assortment of little fics and blurbs from their life, iâd love for yall to give me requests about this family and like situations for me to write but just lmkđ«¶đŸ
hope you guys enjoy!!
It's a warm Saturday morning, and the sun is filtering through the curtains, casting a golden hue on the bedroom walls. You can hear the faint sounds of Rya giggling down the hall, probably escaping from her room to grab her tablet. Beside you, Paige stirs, her arm instinctively wrapping around your waist.
"Morning," she murmurs, her voice husky with sleep.
You turn to face her, smiling softly. "Morning."
Paige stretches, her blonde hair a mess from sleep, and you can't help but think how beautiful she looks, even in these quiet, unguarded moments. She leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips before sitting up. "I'll go check on Rya."
You watch her leave the room, feeling a sense of contentment wash over you. Paige has been a rock in your life, not just for you but for Rya too. At 21, you never imagined your life would look like this, but with Paige, it's better than you ever could have hoped for.
After a few moments, you decide to join them. The smell of pancakes fills the air as you make your way to the kitchen. Rya is sitting at the table, her eyes glued to her tablet screen, a half-eaten pancake on her plate. Paige is at the stove, flipping pancakes with practiced ease.
"Mommy!" Rya's face lights up when she sees you, and you can't help but smile. Her happiness is infectious.
"Hey, baby," you say, giving her a quick hug before moving to Paige's side. "Need any help?"
Paige shakes her head. "I've got it. Just sit and relax."
You do as she says, pouring yourself a cup of coffee and watching the two of them interact. Paige is so natural with Rya, so loving and patient. It's something Caleb never quite managed, he and you had a coparenting agreement, but his presence in Rya's life has been sporadic at best.
"Paigey, can we go to the park today?" Rya asks, her eyes wide with excitement.
Paige looks at you, a silent question in her eyes. You nod, and she turns back to Rya. "Of course, we can, kiddo. After breakfast, we'll get ready and head out."
Rya claps her hands, beaming with joy. You can't help but feel a pang of guilt. You wish Caleb could see this, could be a part of these moments and be a dad to Rya. But then you look at Paige, and the guilt fades. She's stepped up in ways you never expected, becoming an additional mother figure to Rya without hesitation.
After breakfast, the three of you begin to get ready for the park. Rya dashes to her room to brush her teeth and find her favorite sneakers, while you and Paige tidy up the kitchen. You rinse the last of the dishes as Paige sneaks up behind you, hooking her chin over her shoulder and wrapping her arms around your waist.Â
"Ready for a fun day?" she asks, her breath warm against your neck.
You lean back into her embrace, a smile spreading across your face. "I guess, itâs hot as hell out there though."
Paige chuckles, kissing your cheek before letting go. "Cheer up, itâll be fun. Iâm gonna go help Rya with her outfit," she says, heading down the hall.Â
Once the kitchen is clean, you go to your bedroom to change. Opting for a cute Skims athletic set and after you head to Rya's room to grab her.Â
Paige is in her room, seated on her bed and sporting a basic t-shirt with basketball shorts while Ryaâs dancing around the room. She's already picked out her outfitâa bright pink dress and her favorite sneakers. She looks up at you with a toothy grin. "I'm ready, Mommy!"
"Almost, sweetheart. Lemme brush your hair first," you say, grabbing a brush and gently working through her tangles.Â
Once you finish Rya bolts from her room to the front door, bouncing on her toes, her excitement palpable. "Let's go, let's go!"
You grab your bag, making sure you have everything you needâsnacks, water, sunscreen. Paige helps Rya with her small backpack, and you all head out the door. The walk to the park is filled with chatter and laughter, Rya skipping ahead and pointing out every interesting thing she sees.
"Look, Mommy! A butterfly!" Rya exclaims, chasing after it with her arms outstretched.
You smile, watching her with amusement. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"
Paige chuckles beside you as Rya stops suddenly, bending down to pick a small flower. She runs back to you, holding it up proudly. "For you, Mommy!"
"Thank you, baby," you say, taking the flower and tucking it behind your ear.
Paige grins, leaning in to kiss your cheek. "You look even more beautiful now."
You laugh, nudging her playfully. "Youâre so corny"
Rya resumes her skipping, pointing out a bird perched on a tree branch. "Paigey, look! A bird!"
Paige nods, waving at the bird. "Hi, Mr. Bird!"
Rya giggles, imitating Paige. "Hi, Mr. Bird!"
At the park, Rya takes off towards the playground, her joy uncontainable. You find a shady spot under a tree and take a seat on the bench. Paige sits beside you, her hand finding yours, fingers intertwining.
"This is nice," you say, leaning your head on her shoulder.
Paige kisses the top of your head. "It is. We need to do it more often, iâll start begging Coach to give us more days offâ
You laugh softly. "Good luck with that."
Paige smirks. "I have my ways."
You watch Rya climb the jungle gym, her laughter ringing out as she makes a new friend. After a while, Rya runs back to the blanket, her cheeks flushed with excitement. "Mommy, Paige! I made a new friend! Can we have a picnic now?"
Paige smiles, opening the picnic basket. "Absolutely. Let's spread out the food."
You help Rya sit down, and she starts excitedly unpacking the snacks. "Look, Mommy! I brought my favorite cookies!"
You laugh, feeling the warmth of the moment. "Good job, baby."
The three of you enjoy the assortment of snacks, sharing stories and laughter. Rya munches on her cookies, happily chattering.
"Mommy, guess what?" Rya says between bites of her cookie. "My new friend likes the swings too! We took turns pushing each other."
You smile, nodding. "That's great, Ry. Did you have fun?"
Rya nods enthusiastically. "So much fun! And she said I can play with her again next time."
Paige chuckles, taking a sip of water. "Sounds like you made a good friend, Rya."
Rya looks up at Paige with wide eyes. "Paigey, can we come back to the park tomorrow?"
"We'll see, kiddo," Paige replies with a grin. "Maybe if we get all our chores done."
Rya pouts playfully. "Okay, I'll be super helpful!"
You laugh, reaching over to ruffle Rya's hair. "I have no doubt about that."
Paige shifts the conversation. "Man, I forgot we still have that paper to finish for US Litâ
You sigh, nodding. "I know, I've been dreading it. I haven't even started the conclusion yet."
Rya looks between the two of you, curiosity evident on her face. "What's a paper?"
You explain, "It's something we have to write for school, like a long story about a certain topic."
"Oh," Rya says, thoughtfully munching on another cookie. "Can I read it when you're done?"
Paige laughs. "Maybe when you're a bit older, Ry."
The conversation flows easily and eventually, the snacks are gone, you all start packing up. Rya helps by collecting the wrappers and putting them in the trash bag.
After the picnic, you decide it's time to head home. Rya's energy starts to wane as you walk back, and she holds onto Paige's hand, yawning.
"Think someone needs a nap," Paige says with a knowing smile.
Back home, you tuck Rya into her bed, brushing a kiss on her forehead.  Rya mumbles sleepily, "Love you, Mommy. Love you, Paigey."
"Love you too, babes," you both reply in unison.
With Rya down for her nap, you and Paige retreat to the living room. You both have coursework from the university to catch up on. Paige grabs her laptop, settling on the couch, while you take a seat at the dining table with your textbooks.
"How's that paper going baby?" Paige asks, glancing up from her screen.
"Slowly," you admit with a sigh âItâs just so.. goddamn boringâ
âNeed me to come over there and entertain you?â Paige says mischievously
âNo you horndog, do your workâ
Paige laughs, shaking her head. "Alright, alright. But I'm here if you need a break."
The next couple of hours pass in a comfortable silence, the soft sound of typing filling the room. When you both finish your work, Paige stands up, stretching her arms. "I'm gonna  start dinner. Any requests?"
You smile, feeling a wave of gratitude. "Whatever you feel like is fine."
Paige grins and heads to the kitchen. You tidy up your study materials and join her, helping with the prep. The kitchen fills with the delicious aroma of spices and home-cooked food.Â
Dinner is a relaxed affair, the three of you sharing the meal and talking about the day. Rya, now well-rested, is full of energy and stories. After dinner, you go through your nightly routine. Paige handles the dishes while you give Rya a bath.
Rya giggles as you wash her hair, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Mommy, can I have a bedtime story tonight?"
"Of course," you say, wrapping her in a fluffy towel and carrying her to her room. Paige joins you, sitting on the edge of Rya's bed as you read her favorite storybook. Rya listens intently, her eyelids growing heavy.
When the story ends, you kiss her goodnight. "Sleep tight, baby."
Paige leans in, adding her own goodnight kiss. "Sweet dreams, Ry."
 With Rya asleep, you and Paige retreat to your room. Showering before you change into comfortable pajamas, the day's events catching up with you. Paige pulls you into her arms, and you nestle against her, feeling safe and loved.
"Today was perfect," you whisper.
Paige kisses your forehead. "Every day with you and Rya is perfect."
With that you drift off to sleep, your heart full.
âââ
#womenâs basketball#ncaa womenâs basketball#ncaa#wnba#wlw#uconn wbb#paige bueckers#paige bueckers blurbb
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but i think deep (or maybe not so deep) down,, felix thinks he's going to end up with reader,, like they're meant to settle down together one day
This made me imagine a scenario where bestfriend!Felix is cuddling with reader and they have a conversation that goes something like this
Felix: what would you name our children?
Reader: ??Children??! We haven't even kissed though??
It's funny to think that Felix is imagining his entire future with reader and reader is over here still clueless and thinking they're just really close friends đ
omg he for sure would bring this up himself and then immediately gets flustered if reader entertained the thought,, he's so neat đ©·
----
The morning, or, more accurately, the early afternoon is slipping away. It's almost impossible to feel the passage of time while tangled in Felix's sheets, but you're sure it's too late in the day to still be in bed like this.
You and Felix have been quiet, like you always are when you first wake up after a long night out, too groggy and hungover to do much more than be next to each other. Conversation usually leads to the end of the morning's peacefulness anyway, with one of you mentioning something about breakfast or class or other weekend plans.
You're glad to lay here as long as possible, taking your time memorizing the feel of Felix's skin beneath your fingertips. But you and Felix have been awake for awhile now, and you do still have that homework that Felix convinced you could wait until later.
"Okay," you mumble, voice raspy with sleep, "It's been awhile." You smooth your knuckles against his bare shoulder. "We should get up."
He groans, shifting off of his side and onto his back. "Few more minutes." You're about to protest when he stretches out an arm, searching blindly until his palm finds your back. You sigh at the suggestion, but still move to rest your cheek against his chest. "It's Saturday."
Warmth begins to burn its way up your chest. Despite how comfortable you are with Felix, you're still never sure how to act when he decides to go to bed shirtless. "And I have an essay for Redman's class."
He trails his fingers down your back. "That's not due until the end of the week."
You lift your head, chin pressing into his side so you can properly glare. "How do you know that?"
He smiles, the look much too pleased for something so small. "Had lunch with Ollie yesterday."
Right. You should have guessed the answer. Oliver's the only person in that class that you know, which is kind of nice in its own way. You always have someone to sit and do group work with, and if you ever have to be absent you know Oliver takes good note. However, it also means that there's someone to let Felix know your deadlines. Which is usually okay, unless you're in the mood to work ahead and Felix is in the mood for anything else.
"He is such a homework snitch."
Felix laughs, "Homework snitch?"
"You know what I mean."
"'Y'mean," he starts, his thumb brushing past your shirt's collar, "You're sick of me and looking for an excuse to leave."
You roll your eyes, dipping your head forward and pressing a quick kiss against his side. "Exactly." Felix attempts to glare, but with the way his nose scrunches slightly at the unexpected contact, it falls flat. "You know I'm never tired of you."
"Really?" You nod, more focused on the realization that Felix might be ticklish than his probing tone. "Never?"
You nod again, the motion absentminded, "Never." Carefully, you lift your head a little more, propping it up on one arm. "Lex, are you ticklish?"
"No."
Too immediate, too firm.
You're quick, hand moving off a pillow, fingers aiming for his side. Felix is faster, his arm shifting forward in an attempt to stop you. You move your arm back, fingers brushing against his lower side. Felix laughs, the sound nervous. You grin, satisfied.
The brief moment you take to feel your feel victory is your downfall. Felix's hand presses against your wrist, pinning your hand flat against his stomach. "Lovie," he tries, still recovering from his laughing fit, "Play nice."
You look up at him, expression pure innocence, "I always play nice."
"Mhm."
His doubt is offensive. You pout. "I do." You attempt to straighten, Felix's hold on your hand tightens. "I'm going to lay down." He eyes you skeptically. "As a sign of goodwill. Promise."
He loosens his grip before turning your palm over. You intertwine your fingers, squeezing his hand as you lay your head down. "Any plans for today?"
"No." Felix smooths circles against your back. "Just you."
You're glad that your head's turned away from him so that you don't have to mask your grin. "Good."
"Good?"
You drag your thumb against his knuckles. "You know I'm prone to fits of jealousy."
Felix laughs so gently you feel the movement of his chest more than you hear it. "Sounds like you."
Even though there isn't anything hilarious about your joke and Felix has done a lot more to go along with your bits, you laugh too.
Comfortable silence is just beginning to blanket the two of you again when Felix speaks again, "Lovie?" You hum in acknowledgement. "Do you--" He cuts himself off. "Do you want to get married?"
Now you're really glad that your face is turned away from him. "I--I'm going to need a better proposal before answering."
His hand briefly stalls against the fabric of your T-shirt. "No," he huffs the word in a way that's almost a laugh. "I didn't--I mean--I meant generally. At some point."
Oh. A serious question that's a lot less fun than when you could pretend he was proposing. "Oh--uh, I don't know. I mean, it didn't exactly work out for my mom, but some people seem to--" You let out a breath in an attempt to give yourself some time to think through your response. It's not like you've never thought about marriage, but it's not something you have a concrete answer on. "I think so, maybe."
Your own flakiness feels like a cop out response. You swallow before trying again, "If I can find someone I trust, like really trust." Squeezing Felix's hand for assurance, you give yourself another moment to contemplate. "And also, I'd have to be sure that they're the kind of person I can be around forever without feeling drained."
Finally feeling okay with your response, you're ready to move on by asking Felix about his own thoughts on marriage. Before you can turn the conversation, Felix says, "Like the way you trust me?"
Your face burns. "Yeah," you mumble, too distracted by your sudden shyness to even think to joke about it, "Something like that." You're still more flustered than you want to be. "I also said I'd have to not get tired of them, so..."
Felix scoffs, "Oh, don't start." He lifts the hand he's holding, pressing a kiss to the back of your palm. "We'd be happy."
You're quiet because there's nothing you can say. Felix is only teasing, but the more you think about marrying him, the more real the joke feels. Even though he's only your best friend and there's nothing romantic about your relationship, you would be happy with him. How could you not? He's considerate, always putting your feelings first, and you could get used to a lifetime of waking up by his side.
"Do you have any name preferences?"
You lift your head enough to look at him. "What?"
Felix's gaze briefly meets yours before dropping his attention back to your intertwined hands. "Baby names."
Your lips part in surprise, and for a long second, all you can do is blink at him. "Are you still drunk?"
He shakes his head, a smile tugging at his lips. "I'm making conversation."
Okay, a little weird, but if Felix is being so casual about it, maybe you're overthinking it. "Okay," you mumble skeptically, "You probably come with a ton of family, traditional names." His thumb brushes down the back of your hand. "I like the name Lux," you finally manage, "For a girl."
"Lux," he repeats, more to himself than you.
You let yourself openly watch him. "I guess it depends on how many kids we have."
Felix turns his head slightly, teeth grazing against his bottom lip. "Two or three." His eyes focus on the pack of cigarettes on his nightstand. "I mean, I like the idea of two or three."
"Two or three?" You haven't given much thought to the number of children you want. You grew up an only child, mainly around your mother, and that was a little lonely despite her best efforts. You like the general idea of siblings, but with that comes multiple pregnancies and labor. "That's a long time to be pregnant."
He squeezes your shoulder, the gesture comforting. "We don't have to have them right away."
You lay your head down again, temple resting against his side. It's not a terrible thing to imagine, not in the slightest. Felix with a baby in his arms and a toddler or two hanging off his leg. Children with different combinations of your features--a little boy with your hair and his kind eyes, a baby girl with his charming smile and your nose.
Okay--that's enough of that train of thought. The last thing you need is to actually start wanting your best friend to propose. "Considering how far we are from married, I'd hope not."
"Wow," he breathes, dragging the word out. You turn your head, doing your best to look up at him. "I see."
"See what?"
His hand trails down your back warmly. "We're too young for me to propose."
Embarrassment has you attempting to pull away so that you can defend yourself. Felix doesn't let you get too far, his hand on your back making it hard to do much more than hold up your head. "No, I didn't--"
"We're still in school, Lovie. It'd be irresponsible."
The amusement coloring his expression has you glowering. He is so impossible. "Your tone is irresponsible."
"Moody." You're about to protest when he pulls your hand to his lips, kissing your knuckles. "Want to go to breakfast?"
You rest your chin near his stomach. "Is it early enough for breakfast?"
He turns his head, neck stretching at an awkward angle to look at his bedside clock. "If we go to the place down the road with the all day breakfast menu."
You smile, "Cool." You wipe at your eyes with the back of your palm. "You realize to go we have to get up, get ready..."
"Hm," he hums, pretending to contemplate, "Give me five minutes?"
You are starting to feel hungry, but everything's so much warmer this close to Felix. You're comfortable, and it's not like there's a time constraint on breakfast. "Okay, five minutes."
Felix grins, pulling your hand towards him again. He brushes his lips against the back of your palm. "That's my girl."
You roll your eyes in an attempt to hide any obvious signs of total contentment before laying your head down again.
----
taglist; @vader-is-hot @spiritofbuddha @getosangie @freyafriggafrey @ilovehyperfixating @aryiannarae @willowpains @ker0senebunny
#bestfriend!felix x reader#bestfriend!felix#saltburn imagine#saltburn x reader#felix catton x reader#felix x reader#felix catton#jacob elordi x reader#jacob elordi
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Everything to Everyone
James Potter x fem!reader
WC: tbh I donât know, I just raw-dogged this in the app
CW: ANGST, HURT-COMFORT, panic attack, r is very sad and doesnât take care of herself
Summary: you canât keep doing this
A/n: Donât know what this is; might be garbage; but this is just a reflection of my brain and my desperate need for someone like to james to comfort me rn; I need to be someoneâs everything đ
<>
Itâs all too much, trying to be everything for everyone all of the time. It consumes you- the need to help others, to serve them in any way possible. To be their shoulder to cry on. The arms to hold them. The voice cheering them on. The hands to build them castles in the sky.
Perhaps itâs founded in your insatiable hunger to be well-liked, loved even.
Maybe itâs rooted in your fear that everyone will leave you, and that maybe maybe, if you try hard enough, they wonât.
Regardless of its cause, your involuntary obligation to others has pushed you to the edge, leaving you broken and exhausted. You want to cry out for help, for someone to notice, but they donât. Itâs not their fault. You know it isnât. They canât read your mind for goodness sake. But still, you wish theyâd notice. To stop and think about you for a moment.
Today is no different, your list of promises to others longer than the one to yourself. Although itâs a Saturday, your day is jam packed with plans. First, youâve promised Peter that youâll make a quick trip with him to Hogsmeade this morning to pick up fire whiskey for the party tonight. After that youâre due for tea with Mary at Madame Pudifoots before you have to rush back to Hogwarts to meet Remus and Lily for a study session in the library. And fuck- at some point youâll have to stitch up a hole in Marleneâs jersey and braid Siriusâ hair for the game. And the game. Youâve promised James, your lovely boyfriend and captain of the Gryffindor quidditch team, that youâll be there. He needs his âlucky charm.â
Youâre down in the common room at 10 on the nose, sleep still heavy on your eyes despite the time. Peter ambles down the stairs a few minutes later, his big jacket wrapped tightly around him.
The cold air outside is bitter on your nose and burns your cheeks. You bundle your face further into the collar of your coat and wish you wouldâve worn a scarf. As you walk, Peter yaps on to you about the girl from his Divination class that he has a crush on. Youâre enthusiastic that he has a crush, and that he feels comfortable enough to share it with you, but your heart hangs heavy in your chest regardless. You canât quite muster up the genuine smile you usually give to everyone, and instead settle for a dim but encouraging one.
After you triple check that Peter can carry all of the fire whiskey back to the castle, you trudge across the way to Madame Pudifoots. Mary is already nestled into a corner when you arrive and she waves brightly at you. While the warmth of the shop and your friend is welcome, the thick perfume in the air and the sweet array of biscuits and cookies makes your head ache and stomach churn. Much like Peter, the brunette does most of the talking, catching you up on gossip around the castle. You give a lot of dramatic gasps, wide eyes, and giggles, but theyâre as fake as the flowers on the table before you.
By the time you arrive to the library with what feels like a whole ton of books slung over your shoulder, you think you could drop dead from exhaustion. You find Lily and Remus in a heated discussion about some charms theory and wonder if theyâd even notice if you slipped out. Of course, Lily catches your eye in the next second and waves you over. She quickly brings you into the debate, and you give the redhead your two cents. Your opinion, it seems, sets off a whole other conversation. Luckily, this time, you can just tune them out, instead focusing on the words of the book before you. Although now that youâre looking at it, all of the words seem to be swimming together in a blurry mess. And, is that a wet spot on the page? Are you crying? You reach up and, sure enough, another hot tear trails down your face. Panicked, you bend down under the guise of tying your shoe and wipe them away quickly. Remus and Lily canât see you crack. They canât.
You know that itâs all really getting to you when Sirius lets out more than one yelp as you do his hair. He complains that youâre going to pull it all out, and perhaps he isnât wrong. You loosen your grip slightly but wince when you brush over one of the fresh cuts on your hands from sewing up Marleneâs jersey. The bandaid covers the cut, but doesnât dull the slight throbbing pain in your palm. The pain and Siriusâ whining makes you want to yell at him and tell him to do it himself. But you donât, and instead stay quiet. When his hair is finished, you peck his forehead in apology and boost his vanity.
âOi, Black! Trying to steal my girl, are you?â
You nearly start bawling on the spot at the sound of your boyfriendâs voice. Relief and calm wash over you as you feel his strong arms wrap around you. Instinctively, you lean back into his chest and sigh, closing your eyes.
Youâre certain that Sirius and James are bantering back and forth some more but you tune them out in favor of enjoying the vibrations of your boyfriendâs voice through his chest. Itâs pleasant enough that you think you could fall asleep.
Youâre only startled out of your stupor when Jamesâ soft lips press gentle kisses to each of your eyelids. Your eyes flutter open and you smile at him softly.
âHi angel,â he greets, pecking your lips.
You return the kiss eagerly and James chuckles.
âReady for the game tonight?â
Youâd forgotten about the game momentarily, but now it comes rushing back. The thought of having to do anything else besides just lay in your boyfriendâs arms makes you want to cry. You swallow the lump in your throat, âof course, Jamie. And Iâll have your jersey on like usual.â
He gives you another quick peck, âmy lucky charm.â
And then heâs moving away from you, far too fast for your taste, and you nearly whine. He collects his water and broom and turns back to you with a grin.
âSee you at the game, love.â
You only whisper out a goodbye before heâs gone.
The game has been going on for far too long and youâre beginning to lose all feeling in your extremities. Like usual, James is playing great. And youâre proud of him, you really are. But you donât want to be here anymore. You just want to lay in your bed and close off the world, rotting away in a puddle of self-induced misery.
But this fact in itself makes you feel worse than you already do. The guilt of it all- of being fake, insecure, and unsupportive- is eating you alive. Your friends deserve better. James deserves better.
Itâs too much, too much, too much. And you feel like youâre suffocating.
So youâre beyond relieved when Gryffindor catches the snitch and you can leave. Though you normally stay to congratulate James, you donât have it in you to do it. You figure youâll see him later, so you rush back to the castle, trying to escape the notice of your friends.
While your bed calls to you most, living in a dorm doesnât promise any privacy. So you go to the only place you know will- the room of requirement.
It accommodates you enough. The room has shifted into a remarkable replica of your bedroom back home. You collapse onto the bed instantly and your head barely hits the pillow before the sobs youâve choked back all day finally escape you.
Itâs like a dam breaking loose, a flood of emotions overcoming you. Sadness smashes into you like waves, guilt grips your throat tightly, choking you, anger heats your face, and self-loathing broils in your stomach. You canât, canât, canât, canât, canât.
Why, why, why, why, why?
Youâre so tired of giving, giving, giving. Being everything to everyone and nothing to yourself. Your body is a storm of emotions but your heart is the eye of the hurricane- silent and hollow.
You curl in on yourself, grabbing onto your legs tightly, trying to grip any sense of reality you have left. But your body shakes and your hands slip. It does little to ground you and youâre lost in another dimension, another reality. You canât breathe, nothing feels real, and the world feels like itâs ending.
Nothing, nothing, nothing, everything, everything, everything.
âAngel, you gotta breathe for me.â
A voice breaks through your fog but you canât focus in on what itâs saying.
âBaby, my love, look at me. You gotta take a breath.â
Through your shaking and tears you barely make out Jamesâ figure. And when your eyes clear a little you see his eyes. Itâs the first real thing you sense again, and you grasp onto it desperately. His hazel eyes stare at you, so calmly, and you get lost in them.
âAngel can you take a deep breath?â
You try to breathe but fail, only spluttering out short, shallow breaths.
âNot quite, my love. Here, match my breathing.â
James grabs your hand and puts it on his chest. You feel him breathe in deeply and hear him blow air past his lips.
âLike this.â
Still shaking aggressively, you try to inhale. Your breath is harsh and unstable, but at least longer and deeper. You purse your lips and blow, just like James does.
âThatâs my girl. Youâre doing it.â
You continue to breathe in and out. Each time, your breath slowly gets better. Stronger.
âGood, good. Can you tell me what happened?â
You try to think about all thatâs happened and your breathing picks back up again. Tears prick at your eyes and you shake your head.
âNo, no, no. Itâs okay, youâre okay. Iâm sorry, we wonât talk about it.â
Your body trembles and you nod appreciatively.
âDo you want a hug?â
âY-yeah.â
Youâre too weak to move towards him, so James reaches out and draws you into his lap. You bury your face in his chest and grip onto his jersey sleeves tightly. His hands rub soothing circles on your back, soft, slow, and repetitive. He intermittently places kisses to your hair, mumbling words of praise and encouragement in between.
The world starts to come back to you.
The soft sounds of Jamesâ breathing and the whoosh of your shirt material under his hand.
His smell, a mixture of cologne and sweat.
His hot breath on your ear as he whispers to you.
His red jersey smushed against your face.
The remnants of your salty tears on your lips.
âI- I canât keep doing this,â you mumble out. Itâs barely audible, your voice hoarse from your meltdown.
âWhatâd you say, angel?â
âI canât keep doing this, Jamie.â
He pulls you away from his chest and looks deeply into your eyes, his own so filled with concern.
âYou canât keep doing what?â
âBeing everything to everyone all of the time. I- I canât. Itâs too much. I give and help and say yes when I canât. But, but I canât do it anymore.â
âOh, my love,â James sighs, hugging you impossibly tighter, âyou donât have to, not anymore. You donât have to be anything to anyone besides yourself. Theyâll love you regardless. I promise.â
âBut what if they donât?â You whisper, your voice thick with tears.
âIâll love you regardless. Youâre my light, my love, my life just because youâre you.â
He pauses thoughtfully.
âYou donât need to be everything to everyone when youâre already everything to me. And hopefully soon, you can be everything to yourself.â
#james potter x reader#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#harry potter fanfiction#james potter x you#james potter x fem!reader#james potter fic#the maruaders#james potter angst#james potter hurt/comfort
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Ok, I'm losing my head right now. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
The multiversus crossover game brought to us not only the Powerpuff girls... But THE ROWDYRUFF BOYS AS WELL!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
But... Oh girl... Omg... There's even more for me to even lose my head harder đđđđđđđđ
LOOK AT THIS!!! đđđ
It says Powerpuff girls but is actually one of the rowdyruff boys talking... IS BOOMER!!!! To think a simple videogame line is enough to make go crazy delulu like this... Here comes the delulu twisted romantic mental gymnastics đđđ
So i need an explanation. No really i need one. Why is Boomer saying that? Bubbles didn't see what? WHAT YOU DON'T WANT HER TO SEE?? Multiversus you can't leave me like this!! Did he say that because he was clumsy and doesn't want to look lame in front of her? Did he say that because he was doing something bad and doesn't want to look that bad in front of her? Sorry im just going back when they got their second appearance in the show and Bubbles said: I WANT THE BLONDE, I THINK HE IS CUTE!.... IM DYING OVER HERE I NEED ANSWERS!!!! đ«đ«đ«đ«đ«đ«đ«đ«
Update!! The 3 of them say more shippable stuff KYAAAAAAAAA omg omg omg GO WATCH A VIDEO WITH ALL THE RRB MULTIVERSUS VOICE LINES... IM SCREAMING đđđđđ
Im going DELULU!!
also since now they became mainstream thanks to this crossover game i should remind people of other old crossovers as well that are still ongoing and need more love:
FUSIONFALL
The original fusionfall retro and legacy were cancelled i think but i think you can still play the retro. But currently i saw that there's people working on a new version that was going to be renamed: Saturday morning: invasion.
Anyway look at this images from Fusionfall legacies đđ
Boomer will be included in Saturday morning invasion too with a different look... So i hope the project succeeds!!đ€đ€đ€
PPGD: POWERPUFF GIRLS THE DOUJINSHI
This is a Halloween special from the webcomic that is still ongoing in snafu-comics.
Needles to say i fell into the deep pit of shipping hard madness after seeing this đđđ even though i don't need this much, i can go delulu and make up a reason to ship characters out of every insignificant detail, hence the fuss i made over: " I hope Bubbles didn't see that", yeah my blue boy is totally in love đ€Șđ€Șđ€Ș
#ppg x rrb#ppg buttercup#ppg blossom#ppg bubbles#ppg#powerpuff girls z#powerpuff girls#rowdyruff boys#multiversus#fusionfall#ppgd#Powerpuff girls the doujinshi#rrb#rrb brick#rrb boomer#rrb butch#the powerpuff girls#the rowdyruff boys
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sneak peek!
I think when this month is over i'm gonna make my jersey devil icon wear a little sun hat and an ice cream cone or maybe cocktail glass in their hand for the rest of the summer (how I'm trying to be #hot girl summer đ«Ą)
#this is what i do on a saturday morning when i don't want to leave my bed >:)#sooo many errands today đ and it's supposed to go up to like 30°C kill me pls
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