#then i see a really stupid fe take and it's like. damn that's crazy. i never want to exist in the same bubble as you again. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tojitiddies · 4 years ago

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✰ [GHOST] BUSTING MAKES ME FEEL GOOD

pairing ⋆ connie springer x fem!reader

synopsis ⋆ you don’t know who’s crazier. your ghost hunting boyfriend or you for even dating him.

warnings ⋆ paranormal encounters, slight ghost coercion, oral sex, vaginal sex, creampie

ꔵ there was no doubt about it, your boyfriend connie was an oddball. like tin hat wearing, crazy conspiracist, dark reddit forum odd. his friends often asked him how he’d bagged a chick like you in the first place and honestly you were curious too. you’d met him at a halloween party your best friend mikasa had thrown. one wild night and two awkward dates later you both became that sickeningly sweet couple that everyone hated to love.

at this point in your relationship you had grown used to connie’s random 3AM messages about some spooky forum he’d found or him sending random true crime articles he wanted you to read. he and his roomates jean and sasha all ran a somewhat popular youtube channel — they called themselves “the phantom philosophers” — where they covered different cryptid and ghost stories sent to them by viewers. they also went on numerous ghost hunts to try and speak or communicate with ghosts. you were always curious about your boyfriend’s odd way of life and even appeared on one of his streams once — his subscribers couldn’t believe he had a girlfriend. so, when connie asked you if you wanted to come along with him, jean, and sasha for a ghost hunt you jumped at the opportunity.

that’s exactly how you found yourself in front of an abandoned church while your boyfriend and his friends began setting up their equipment. tonight they were looking for the ghost of a pastor who secretly ran his own brothel beneath the church. one of the women had turned on him and murdered him while they were having sex. the story seemed completely made up, but connie assured you it was legit.

you watched as connie started setting up his body camera and clipping it to his jacket. “so...anything i can help with?” you asked, rocking back on the heels of your sneakers. connie looked up at you as if he’d forgotten you were there. “huh? oh, no babe you’re fine. just stand there looking pretty.” he replied sweetly. you forced a smile towards him, letting it falter when he went back to messing with his equipment. you had only agreed to this because you wanted to spend time with him, but this entire trip he’d been so distracted. you were so used to having his attention all the time, it was starting to take you out of the mood.

you decided to go find out what sasha was doing. she had a boyfriend too, niccolo. he was really nice and an amazing cook. earlier you’d asked her why he didn’t come with you all, to which she told you that niccolo was secretly a huge fraidy cat. when you approached her she was sitting in the trunk of jean’s pick up. she seemed to be really focused on...some sort of device? “what’s that?” you queried, sitting next to her. sasha beamed and shoved it into your lap. “this, my friend, is a modernized proton pack like the ghostbusters use! i’ve been engineering this baby for a couple months now and this is gonna be its first field run!” she squeals as she begins to point out all the functions and uses of the device. it looked sort of like a portable cd player.

while sasha babbled on about her “precious baby” jean and connie approached you both, equipment and cameras ready. “here you are ____.” jean presented you with a headlamp and a frequency tuner. “now first rule of ghost hunting, do not be on your own. you’re always gonna want a buddy. i’m assuming connie will fill that role?” he asked, looking between the two of you. you were still annoyed with him but you nodded anyway. you’d bring it up when the two of you were alone. “alright then. sasha you’re with me. and don’t even think about trying to spook me this time, i took self defense lessons and i’ll definitely clock you this time.” he scolded, to which sasha responded by rolling her eyes. “oh please, it was just a joke pony boy.” she taunted. jean shot her a glare. “keep it up.” he warned before turning back to you.

“second rule, do not under any circumstances curse a ghost. not only will that anger the ghost and make it mad at you, it will also get mad at everyone else and we don’t want any part of your beef. so keep it to yourself.” it was your turn to roll your eyes. “jean you don’t need to mansplain ghost hunting to me, i’m not stupid. plus i watch you guys’ channel all the time.” you say, sliding off the truck and situating the headlamp on. “i’m ready to get to some ghostbustin!” sasha hops up and high fives you. connie laughs and wraps his arm around your waist. “ah don’t worry jean, i’ll be with her the whole time.” jean stares blankly between the three of you before shaking his head.

“whatever. connie go ahead and start your body cam. it’s time to head in.” connie chuckles at jean’s annoyance and switches on the camera, a small red light peeps out to signal it’s recording. jean has one on as well, tapping his slightly to test it out. “alright gang, buckle up. i’m trying to meet a horny ghost.” he said with a grin, beginning his march into the church, the three of you following close behind.

ꔵ inside the church it was dusty and reeked of mildew. you pinched your nose as you and the others switched on your headlights. “jesus christ, it fucking stinks.” connie remarks. sasha elbows him in the rib. “dude we’re in a haunted church, you can’t take the lord’s name in vain.” she scolds him before crossing her shoulders in silent prayer. you giggle as connie rolls his eyes at sasha’s ridiculous antics. a strong gust of wind blows through the church, causing the front entrance to slam shut. you shriek, grabbing ahold of connie’s arm while sasha laughs at your frightened behavior. “don’t worry ____, ‘s just the wind.” connie reassures you, rubbing your shoulder.

“alright guys enough fucking around. it’s time to split up and cover more ground.” jean says, taking charge. “sasha, you and i are gonna explore the chapel and the pastor’s office. connie and ____, you both are going down to the abandoned brothel in the basement.” he instructs. connie groans and folds his arms. “seriously? that’s probably where his ghost is hiding.” connie complains. you tense up at that. it was only your first ghost hunt and they were sending you right into the fire. “that’s the point dumbass? sasha and i will be up here gathering frequencies and seeing if we can find any phantom residue. if you two can get in contact with the pastor, we can probably record his frequencies from up here to listen back later.” he explains.

sasha pulls some weird tool from her fanny pack, holding it up. “this is mission is perfect for using my tuning fork! i’ve been wanting to try this for ages.” she squeals, her voice echoing through the church. “damn sasha, lower your voice.” jean mutters, to which she responds with another giggle mumbling out a quiet “sorry”. jean looks back to the two of you. “well we have our assignments, lets get this show on the road my fellow philosophers.” jean salutes you both and opens the doors to the chapel, sasha waves and follows after him before shutting the door behind them. “jerk.” connie mutters under his breath. you squeeze his hand and smile up at him.

“c’mon connie, i wanna see my boyfriend bust some ghosts.” you say, hoping to cheer him up a little. connie nodded, barely acknowledging your attempt before starting to head off towards the doors leading to the basement. “alright babe, stick close. i have no idea what’s down here.” he instructed. you hummed in disinterest and began to follow him in his descent. amazing! astonishing even! you were practically throwing yourself at him, yet your boyfriend was still more interested in some stinky old pastor ghost. as you traveled deeper downstairs, the air around you began to get warmer like a stuffy room. by the time you’d gotten down to the basement there was a humid temperature surrounding you.

“is it to supposed to feel so warm down here?” you asked, taking connie’s hand to be as close as possible to him. connie whipped his head around the basement floor shining his headlamp on all the different doors. “you would think it’d be cold with all this concrete, it’s weird.” he finally answered, switching on his frequency tuner. you followed his movements and did the same. “good weird or bad weird?” you asked again, growing a bit concerned. connie shrugged before making his way towards one of the doors, his frequency tuner picking up. you glared at him, having had enough of his nonchalant attitude.

seduce him.

you blinked as the thought came from seemingly nowhere. you shook your head, deciding to ignore it. you watched connie peak into the room that was making his frequency tuner go off the wire, letting out a gasp. “____! you’ve gotta come see this!” he exclaims, grinning back at you before making his way inside. you follow after him, curious to see what surprised him so much that he actually acknowledged your existence. when you stepped inside you were surprised to find the room...spotless? there wasn’t a speck of dust anywhere. the decorative rugs and tapestries that hung on the walls created an erotic atmosphere. the large bed looked clean and comfortable as well, an oil lamp sitting on the bedside. “i thought this church was abandoned, who’s doing the upkeep?” you observed, still taken aback by the surprisingly clean and crisp room. connie pressed his hand down on the bed, feeling it out. “no idea. even the mattress and blankets feel fresh.” he marveled.

seduce him and gain his favors!

this time the thought echoed louder through your head, making you feel a bit lightheaded. your knees buckled causing you to drop down to the floor. connie whipped his head around in shock, instantly rushing to see if you were alright. “you okay baby?” he asked, concern lacing his words. you nodded and took his hand to help you stand back up. almost as instantly as you were back on your feet you felt the pressure in your head drop to your chest and then to your arousal. you let out a small whimper at the sudden wave of pleasure that came out of nowhere. connie pressed the back of his hand to your forehead, his touch felt like lightning.

“are you sure you’re okay? maybe we should — “ the door to the bedroom slammed shut behind you, but you didn’t really care. all you could think about was satisfying the sudden hunger that had come over you. connie jiggled the doorknob trying to get the door back open, curses spilling out of his lips. you sauntered up behind him, snaking your arms around his waist, swirling them up to lay your hands on his pecs. “wha — ____?” he turned his head to his shoulder, trying to get a view of you. you giggled and kissed his shoulder. “awh baby, we can stay in here and get comfy.” you whine, pressing yourself against him. connie tensed up in your embrace, caught off guard by your sudden switch in attitude. the oil lamp beside the bed flickered on, casting the room in a warm dim orange glow. connie grabbed your hands and snatched them off his chest. he spun around to face you, cupping your face in his hands.

“____, hey get ahold of yourself!” he tried snapping you out of it, his fingers popping between your eyes. you leaned up and kissed him under his chin. “i want you to get ahold of me.” you murmured, grabbing his wrists to place his hands on your waist. you batted your eyelashes at him with those puppy dog eyes you knew he couldn’t resist. connie gulped, his hand hands instinctively squeezing around your waist. “y-you’re not yourself, this isn’t right.” he muttered under his breath, more so talking to himself.

you snaked your arms up and around his shoulders walking back into the bed, flipping around to push him into the bed. “you made me very upset, ignoring me all night for your dumb ghost hunt.” you said, planting yourself in his lap, running your thumb along his lips. “how are you going to make it up to me?” connie frowns furrowing his brows. you don’t even wait for him to answer before letting your head fall to the side, kissing over the expanse of his neck.

connie shivered, falling prey to your advances. you snatched off both your headlamps in a playful demeanor while your other hand trailed down to the seat of his pants, letting your fingers splay out across his crotch. “____…w-wait a moment.” he breathed, letting out a slight moan when you squeezed your hand around his clothed length. you giggled softly, slithering from his thigh to between his legs. you nudged his crotch with your nose, looking back at up at him. his face was flushed and his eyes were glazed over with lust. that was all the indication you needed to begin to undoing his jeans.

your mind was clouded with thoughts of your boyfriend fucking your mouth and praising you with all the attention you’d yearned for. you pulled down his pants and boxers, licking your lips at his erect cock, leaking with precum. taking your thumb to his tip, you gently began to spread around the sticky substance. your tongue darted out to kitten lick the little mess you made, leaving connie hissing and squirming. “you’re such a tease.” he grunted. you grinned up at him knowingly before tilting your head to kiss along the length of his shaft.

connie desperately bucked his hips slightly as your kisses became wet and suctioning. done teasing him, you eagerly wrapped your lips around him sucking his tip before bobbing your head further. your tongue swirled around his shaft expertly, causing him to groan and buck his hips. you moan as his cock travels further down your throat, the vibrations of your voice stimulating him further.

“fuck baby…keep sucking me in just like that.” he huffs out, trying to keep his moans from pitching. his hands nestle in your hair, bringing your head down further. you relaxed your jaw as he continued to fuck your mouth, saliva collecting and dripping down your chin. connie bucked his hips into your mouth with fervor, you could tell he was close. “your throat feels so fucking good around me, keep swallowing me down just like that.” he praised, letting his head fall back against his shoulders.

he takes another deep thrust before you feel him spill his thick warm release down your throat. his cock twitches on your tongue as you slowly drag his length from your mouth. connie sits breathless on the bed, panting from the climax he’d just had, but you weren’t finished. you rose back up to your feet and stripped off your jeans and panties before crawling on top of him. with your hands slowly lifting your shirt over your head, you ground your wet cunt against the underside of his length.

connie stared up at you, his daze apparent on his face. “my turn.” you whisper, kissing the side of his mouth. you raised your hips slightly positioning his cock at your entrance before sinking down. you whimpered as you felt him filling you up all at once. connie took ahold of your hips, hissing as you clenched around him. “shit…your pussy loves sucking me in.” he groaned, bucking his hips again.

you whine, rocking your hips back against him. “it’s because i wanna feel you, right here.” you move your hand to your lower stomach, where you wanted to feel connie push against. connie smirked, lifting his knees up on and raising you up to hover over him slightly. “i can do that for you baby.” he growled into your ear before rapidly thrusting his cock into you. you grabbed ahold of his shoulders as he bucked into you, trying to keep your balance.

connie kept his word, fucking you balls deep with no mercy. you were so overwhelmed by pleasure you didn’t realize how loud you’d become. the oil lamp flickered as connie swiftly switched positions so you were on your back. he pushed your thighs back exposing your wet cunt that gaped for connie’s cock. he smirked and spit against you clit rising a whine from your throat. he chuckled cruelly before burying his cock back inside of you, his thrusts causing you to lurch up against the bed.

you clawed your hands over his his shoulder blades as he fucked you deep. “you feel so good, don’t stop!” you moan, arching you back as he hits your sweet spot. connie groaned from the way. you squeezed around him before leaning down to kiss you, his tongue swirling around yours. the sinful noises that came from between you both, echoing through the room. connie moved his lips across your jaw, praising you as he kissed and sucked your skin. you dazedly let your head fall to the side.

then you saw him.

a young man dressed in preachers robes, watching you both intently. you cried out clinging to connie — connie assumed it was a moan and continued to fuck into you. the preacher grinned at you and faded from your eyesight. just then connie let out a grunt. “shit baby, i’m gonna cum.” you were too dumbfounded to respond but it didn’t matter. connie had already grabbed your waist, pulling you down on his cock faster. the movement shocked you out of your mindstate, making you forget about the whole “pervy preacher ghost in the corner of the room” thing.

“fuck connie keep going!” you whine, your hand coming to grab your tits to keep them from bouncing out of your bra. connie fucked you like that until your legs became jelly and you creamed all over his cock. just as you were catching your breath connie came inside you, spilling his thick seed all over your walls. connie collapsed into your chest taking deep breaths.

“shit.” he breathed out, his hand squeezing your waist. “you okay baby?” he asked, tilting his head back to look at you. you smiled and nodded, massaging his short silvery hair. connie seemed to have a thought of realization and frowned. “i’m sorry ____. i should’ve done more to make you feel like i wanted you here. i must’ve looked like such an asshole. i was so focused on busting ghosts, i forgot the most important thing i wanted out of this was to introduce my girl to my uh…hobbies.” the sincerity in his eyes had you swooning. you cupped his cheek and leaned down to kiss the top of his head. “you’re forgiven.”. you say, before sitting up.

not a good idea.

your head was spinning. you moaned and grabbed your head, massaging it. “____? baby, what’s wrong?” connie asked worriedly, sitting up as well. then just as quick as the dizziness came, it went. you blinked. “i have no idea. maybe you just fucked me too hard, hm?” you teased, poking his shoulder. connie pressed the back of his hand against your forehead. you couldn’t read his expression, tho it looked like a mix between a shock, confusion, and disappointment. in short, nothing good. “what?” you ask.

connie shook his head. “this is gonna sound crazy, but do you think you were possessed?” he blurted out. you bit your lip, remembering the preacher and the strange echoing voice in your head. “ah…maybe? but i wanted that, it was me no one was controlling me. it just felt more like someone was egging me on.” you explained. even coming from your own mouth it sounded delusional. “oh my god connie, did i get possessed?!” you squealed, snapping your legs shut.

connie laughed and leaned forward, pulling you into his embrace. “no it wasn’t possession baby. just a bit of paranormal influence, like in the poltergeist.” this did not reassure you whatsoever, but connie was already sliding off the bed. “c’mon let’s go back upstairs and see what jean and sasha found. don’t tell them what happened okay? jean’ll kill the shit out of me.” he chuckled, kissing the top of your forehead. you did once over of the room again to make sure there was no ghost priest hiding in here before starting to get dressed again.

ꔵ “finally you two are here! you’ve gotta come see this!” sasha exclaimed as she saw the both of you approaching. sasha and jean had hooked up some sort of computer and were huddled around it. “what is it you?” connie questioned, taking your hand and hurrying you towards them. you smiled, relieved that he had meant what he said and was starting to finally include you. “it seems like whatever you guys did down there worked! we recorded these weird frequencies and we think we might have caught the pastors attention.” jean said, clicking around the screen.

you and connie exchanged wide eyed glances. “uh…what did you hear?” you asked, instinctively squeezing connie’s hand. jean and sasha shrugged. “nothing, we couldn’t hear it until it finished recording.” jean grinned up at the two of you. “but you arrived at perfect timing, now we can play it back together.” jean pulled up the sound byte. “jean i don’t think — “ connie started to protest, but jean had already pressed the space bar.

the empty church echoed with the sounds of your lewd moans and connie’s sensual praises. the heat rushed into your cheeks as you looked down in shame. you didn’t wanna see anyone else’s facial expressions. after what seemed like forever sasha’s hand darted out to pause it. safe to assume you were never invited to go ghost hunting with you boyfriend and his friends again. however you and connie did some extensive research afterwards.

connie’s body cam had mysteriously became static when he walked into the bedroom, so there was no footage of the ghost — you were honestly just relieved the two of you didn’t film a sex tape. however, apparently the ghost of the priest wandered the church, waiting to lure couples into the brothel rooms so that he could gain pleasure from seeing his brothel still be put to use. seven other couples who had visited the church also reported a strange occurrence where they ended up having sex in the brothel as well. you wondered how jean had missed that key part of research about the ghost.

“we may not have busted that ghost, but he sure made us bust.” connie cackled, nudging you. you gave him a pointed look. “you make awful jokes.” you told him, nudging him back. though the experience was a bit of a mindfucker, it truly brought you and connie closer together.

author’s note: hello again! this took me a really long time to write and yet it still feels really rushed :( i tried to do what i could in the edits but this probably isn’t my favorite. i would appreciate feedback if anyone has any though and if you did actually like it, thank you! i promise i can do way better though lmao </3

#connie x reader #connie smut #connie springer x reader #connie springer #connie springer smut #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #aot x reader #aot #snk smut #snk #x reader

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snexy-the-snail · 4 years ago

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FE FI FO FUM

It's come to my attention that fe fi fo fum isnt fully uploaded. So here you go complete story! @guiltydyslexicteen helped with this one <3))

Peter wasn't sure how he got talked into playing a game with Morgan but he wasn't going to complain too much, she was pretty cute after all. Besides, it was a good chance to associate the instinct with fun and safety.

He liked his mentor and all but the first time he had been tucked away wasn't fun at all, actually, he had avoided Tony for a while after that. Even if he had been semi-okay with it at the time it still had given him a bit of a scare.

It definitely made him stay away from the avengers for the time being as well, he liked them and all but he wasn't too keen on being squashed down into their stomachs every three seconds. He wasn't sure what it was about him that screamed 'eat me' but it extended to the affected people on the streets as well, which was utterly terrifying to be completely honest.

Currently he was sneaking around a giant house with Morgan, trying to avoid their giant da- to avoid Morgan's giant dad. Not his dad, Morgan's.

"Fe fi fo fum, I'm gonna put you in my tum!"

Man, Peter would never get over the silly voices Mr.Stark would do for Morgan, he found himself smiling as Morgan squealed quietly with laughter.

"We gotta hide 'pidey!" Morgan whispers a bit loudly. Peter shakes his head fondly and just scoops the kid up making his way to hide under a cabinet. His spider-sense definitely made this game a lot easier, it was constantly thrumming under his skin, spiking when his mentor got a little too close for comfort.

"Alright Mo-mo we're hiding, do you think the giant will find us now?" He asks keeping his voice low. He had no idea if Mr.Stark could hear them or not but he wasn't going to take any chances. He'd like to win thank you very much.

"Maybe, daddy is very good at finding," Morgan says playing with his hoodie strings. apparently, She didn't seem too bothered by the whole instinct happening, then again Mr.Stark probably had better control with her. He felt slightly jealous of her at first but figured it was better that she hadn't been scared by her dad.

"Maybe you'll win this time?" Peter suggests with a small smile, creeping around the corner to hide under the cabinet with Morgan still settled in his arms. He totally wouldn't have been able to do this without his powers. Though, he probably would've still been hiding under the dresser.

"Nah, Daddy always wins, it's 'kay though cause it's super fun!" Morgan says grinning widely. Peter wanted to remind her that he wasn't exactly all human and could easily win if he tried, but his senses screamed at him and the floor started to vibrate. He nervously headed more under the cabinet for more shelter. There was no way his mentor had heard them...right?

He wasn't gonna lie, being on the floor when they were this small was terrifying. Anything could take them out, even the rumba. He loved that little robot but it wasn't fun when it tried to vacuum him up.

Morgan giggles quietly. Peter noticed a pair of shoes slowly coming into view. Clearly, He and Morgan had very different viewpoints on this game.

"Where could they be? Are they behind the bread?" Tony asks loudly. Peter shudders slightly. He knew that tone, that was the 'I know exactly where you are' tone. Morgan was right, Mr.Stark was pretty good at finding. Maybe it was that father's instinct? Either way, they were going to be found.

"Shh, he’s gonna find us," Morgan whispered loudly. Peter loved her, he did, but they desperately needed to work on her whisper voice. No wonder she always lost, she wasn't exactly the quietest kid to ever grace the earth.

Quietly, Peter stepped backward. One foot behind the other, he clutched Morgan like a teddy bear and reached the back cabinet leg. Nothing was stopping him from walking up it. Soon, they were both on the top underside of their temporary hiding space. Morgan's hair now in Peter’s face as he tried to reposition her.

Meanwhile Tony stopped to smirk at their antics. Peter certainly made this game more entertaining for him. Not that Morgan made it boring, but when the other kid could freakin' detect him coming from a mile away, that added a twist for sure. Slowly and surely he turned to face the cabinet, twisting on his heels as he went.

“Kids, you’ve outdone yourselves,” He knelt on one knee “hiding from the hungry giant in the kitchen.” He leaned down to peer under the cabinet, making a point of thoroughly investigating the floor.

“I’d call that Irony genius guys, except… I'm pretty clever too.” He let his gaze drift upwards to both amused and terrified faces. Stuck to the ceiling, Peter gave a kind of grimace while Morgan happily waved at her father.

“Hi Hungry giant!” She called “please don’t eat us! We’re just kids!”

“Oh, well you see. Children are my favourite snack.” Tony replied matter-of-factly “You’ll have to give me another reason.”

“We don’t taste very good!” Morgan reasoned.

“Yeah, Mr. Stark! We’ve been under this dusty cabinet the whole time!” Peter added while giving Morgan an encouraging nod.

“Nice try! I know for a fact the Roomba can fit under there.” Tony responded playfully.

Tony’s hand reached under the cabinet and towards both of them. Peter tried and failed to scamper away, but Morgan had decided to become a ragdoll all of a sudden. It was a choice between dropping her or escaping.

“Fe Fi Fo Fum! You kids can’t run!” Tony bellowed “At least not for long.” Soon he had a hand around the two, and Peter had decidedly not unstuck himself. Not wanting to hurt the kid, he tried another approach. Keeping one hand on top of them, he changed his grip and started to gently pull Morgan from his grasp. As soon as Peter knew what he was doing, he let go. The heap of kids landed in Tony’s palm.

While Tony brought them up to his face, Peter readjusted to sit cross-legged, Morgan in his lap.

“Noooooooooooo!” Peter called “Giant please let us go!”

“Yes! Please giant!” Morgan echoed.

“Aw, look at you two,” Tony smirked at them when they were level with his face “So cute! I could eat you up!”

Before they could protest Tony plucked Morgan from Peter again and licked her. Peter cringed as she giggled. That’s one thing he couldn't get over, the licking, for some reason that was the weirdest part to him.

Morgan was giggling like crazy, fitting in desperate pleas to be spared. None of them had any heart behind them though. Because really, she didn’t mind all that much. Being tucked away with her dad always made her feel safe, and it was always a bonus when Pete was there!

Eventually Tony let her have a breather before he finally put her in his mouth. Tony always treated her delicately, even more so than Peter. She was very fragile, and of course Tony knew it. Even if she wasn’t it wouldn’t have made a difference. Morgan was his kid and it was clear to anyone he loved her more than anything.

Morgan sat in the darkness of her father's mouth. Pinned to the top. she couldn't move, and her breathing grew more rapid. Desperately trying to comfort his kid, Tony started lapping at her, but to no avail. When he was out of ideas he opened his mouth and took out his child. Holding her tightly, despite the slime. Tony stared in mute horror until she calmed down. Peter swung over to the hand holding her.

“Daddy!” Morgan exclaimed between gasps for air “You forgot to let me crack my glow stick!”

Tony stood there computing for a second.

SHIT

“Oh my god Honey I am so so sorry!” he loosened his grip on her “your glow stick, how could I forget” She started taking it out of her pocket.

“Mo-Mo, you know monsters can’t get you when you're with Mr. Stark right?” Peter asked her

“I know Petey! But the dark is still scary”

“Why?”

“I dunno, it just is” a frown crept onto her face

“Kiddo, can you crack your glow stick?” Tony asked after a moment. Morgan nodded and did what she was told. The blue light was barely noticeable in the brightness of the kitchen, but it was there. “Are you okay to go back?” Tony delicately questioned. Morgan nodded again and stuck the glow stick around her wrist.

She was placed into his mouth and held once more, this time Tony swallowed. Peter watched the lump go down his throat and Tony trace it with his free hand. Peter crawled down Tony’s arm and leaped to his stomach, just in time for Morgan to arrive. Shivers ran down his spine when Tony swallowed thickly again. Morgan landed with an audible ‘oof’.

Yep. Still unsettling.

“You okay kiddo?” Tony softly asked as he put a hand beside were Peter was. He felt her push against him.

“I’m okay daddy!” She called back.

“Oh. well, see, Spider-boy?” Tony made a grab at Peter but he yelped and dodged. “It’s not so bad” another grab and dodge “you just have to cooperate” on the third try he managed to grab the kid. “Wow you really are resistant today”

Peter managed to squirm away from his grip and crawl onto the back of his hand.

“It’s just not a top priority to end up in your gut Mr. Stark” Peter snarked back.

Tony brought Peter up to his face and hugged him against his cheek. His beard lightly tickling Peter. He could feel Peter practically vibrating with nervous energy.

As much as he hated making the kid anxious, he was damn well going to have to get used to it. ‘Cause that stupid voice in his head was really going off right now.

Eat

Him

Eat him

Eat

Protect

“You know you love it sometimes,” Tony’s smile could be heard through his words “not always, but sometimes ”

Peter wasn’t allowed to speak before Tony put him into his mouth. He was pinned to its roof and gently pushed around. His hair dampened by the saliva as he lay face down on the plush tongue. He still found it gross, anyone would, but he would be a liar if he said it wasn’t calming coming from Mr. Stark. Eventually, the adrenaline died down and Peter stopped shaking. Tony gave him one last squeeze against the roof of his mouth. Comforted by the weird version of a hug, Peter eased his tense muscles as best he could.

The deep swallow reverberated through Peter's mind as pressure was rolled onto his face and shoulders. Then his torso. Then his whole body.

Squished in Mr. Stark's throat, Peter focused his mind on the booming heartbeat he drew closer to. When Tony first saved his life at Stark expo, he never imagined he’d be so close to his idol.

Peter had to laugh at the fact he was now traveling down his gullet. Not even for the first time.

Another tight ring rolled up his body after a second swallow from Tony. Peter made a point of sticking to the ‘ceiling’, because as expected, Morgan was right in the landing zone.

Frankly, all of it was landing zone, and Peter was meer inches away from Morgan from their perspective. Despite their proximity, Morgan narrowly managed to weasel out of the way. Peter dropped with a squelch onto the stomach floor.

Peter went back to his cross-legged position, just barely able to sit up. He hoisted Morgan from leaning on his side to sitting in his lap. Tony started to rub at the both of them ever so gently.

“Are you kids okay?” Tony asked. Morgan answered before Peter could compute the question.

“I’m okay daddy!” She called back, “ ‘pidey’s okay too” Morgan raised her glow stick hand to the slick flesh and pushed against it. Tony pushed back with one light finger.

And with that, the spider-sense stopped tingling. The thrumming under his skin eased. The hair on his arms went down. Peter leaned back into the soft flesh. He let the noise of Tony’s body overpower his thoughts.

“Pete? Kiddo?” Mr. Starks concern snapped Peter out of his haze. “I just want to hear from you, went limp”

“M-fine Mr. Stark” Peter replied “I’m just… I’m just tired”

“Alright Spiderling... I could use an afternoon nap” Tony patted at them “I just had a pretty hefty lunch after all” He started to stroke deep circles into their side. “Morgan, you okay in there? Are you going to nap too?”

When she didn’t answer Peter looked down and tapped her shoulder.

Morgan had already fallen asleep. Lulled by the comforting sounds of her father all around and the security of both him and her unofficial brother holding her close.

All Peter could think was

Adorable. Tiny child is freaking adorable.

He could feel Tony start to tense around them both making their cramped space even smaller.

Stretching out his tired legs as far as he could Peter started to gently push at the muscle:

.- .-.. .-. . .- -.. -.-- / .- ... .-.. . . .--.

ALREADY ASLEEP

Peter adjusted Moran as he felt Tony’s body ease. He heard a mild chuckle as they both started to sway. Leaning back into the soft comfort that was Tony Freakin’ Stark's stomach, Peter clutched slumbering Morgan tight to his chest. Gravity changed once more and Peter let his eyes drift closed.

Tony had sauntered over to the well-worn couch and sunk into the comforting cushions. Kneading at his stomach until he felt Peter's breath slow. Until he was confident Peter was asleep. His vision faded as he dozed off. Only awoken briefly when Pepper joined him on the couch. Together, the Stark family took an afternoon nap, in their weird unique way.

And as for the hungry giant

He was satisfied

For now

#marvel vore #avengers vore #reupload

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bgn846 · 4 years ago

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Together At Last a/b/o ffxv ot4 fic

Noct was so done with this bullshit, this had to stop. Knocking loudly on the door to Gladio and Ignis’ apartment Noct waited for an answer. They were home he knew this much, it was their date night. Pushing aside his slight wave of guilt at interrupting them he twisted his face into a scowl. This was serious, their stupid actions were making Prompto feel bad, he was sure of it.

Finally, he heard noise from inside and the small light from the peephole briefly faded. The door opened immediately afterward and Ignis was there looking an equal mix of worried and confused. “Highness, is everything alright? I thought you were staying at home this evening with Prompto?”

Seeing Ignis start to fret was doing things to his inner alpha, and they weren’t even together like that. Working to stay focused Noct tried to steer his teenage brain back on track. This was about his future beta, not Ignis. “No, everything is not alright!” he spit out while crossing his arms, Gladio did this all the time it looked intimidating enough.

“What’s happened, do we need to call Cor? Is Prompto alright? Where is he?” Ignis asked rapid-fire as he moved aside to allow him entry.

“Princess, what the hell are you doin’ here?” Gladio asked as he joined them in the hallway.

Forgetting his plan Noct barged in past Ignis and got right up in Gladio’s face. “I’m here because you two are making Prompto upset!”

“Whoa, hey, no need to be all crazy!” Gladio shouted back. “We didn’t do anything wrong, what’s this all about?”

“Is he alright?” Ignis tried once more, it was clear he was worried.

Ignoring the question, Noct continued to glare daggers at both of them. “He cried today because of whatever game you two are playing!” Unfurling his arms he pointed a finger directly in Gladio’s face and then to Ignis.

“We are not playing any games, I can assure you,” Ignis responded quickly. “Please, will you tell us what’s happened?”

“You two should know! Seriously this is stupid I can’t believe you’d pull this shit. You know I love him and this is what you do?” Noct couldn’t believe his friends would have treated Prompto so badly. His best friend had been acting strangely for nearly a month and today it was the worst. His beta had cried and when Noct questioned him about it Prompto refused to say. The only hint Noct had was when he mentioned possibly talking to Gladio and Ignis, Prompto had flipped out. They’d done something to him Noct was sure of it!

“We haven’t done anything to Prompto, I swear!” Gladio exclaimed. “You need to calm down and explain yourself.”

Hearing Gladio dismiss him so easily made Noct’s alpha tendencies flare, all rational thought was rapidly beginning to lose out to his anger. Before he realized what was happening Noct was yelling at Gladio and trying to hit him. His shield deflected his attempts which only made Noct madder. Vaguely aware of hands-on him Noct growled and tried to hit Gladio once more. His focus was solely on the other alpha in front of him. Then out of nowhere a sour scent filled the air and Noct snapped back to the moment with alarming clarity.

Ignis was standing between them holding his head with one hand. The other was blindly reaching out for something stable. Gladio had already moved to grab his arm. “Babe?! Fuck, did you get hit?” he asked with worry.

“No, its – you both – it’s too much,” Ignis managed before he listed to the side and Gladio caught him. “Your scents are too strong,” he added with a whine.

“Shit, sorry, how can I help?”

“Dunno,” Ignis hissed right before his legs buckled and Gladio carefully lowered him to the floor.

“Are you in pain? What’s wrong? Talk to me please,” asked Gladio in a panic. It was obvious that he was very worried.

Without thinking, Noct kneeled down nearby and went to reach out to touch Ignis’ shoulder. Something in his brain was screaming at him to comfort Ignis. The urge to protect his friend was the strongest it had ever been. Unable to understand this new sensation he simply went along with what his inner alpha wanted. That is until Gladio hugged Ignis close and growled at him.

Noct couldn’t stop himself from growling back and leaning into Gladio’s space. How dare he display such aggressive behavior, they were friends after all. Still unsure why he was feeling so off Noct continued to counter Gladio’s growls with his own.

“Not helping, not helping, not helping,” Ignis whimpered from where he was practically sandwiched between them.

Gladio stopped his alpha display the second Ignis fell quiet. “Sorry babe, I don’t know what to do to help, do we need to go to the doctor?” he asked leaning back to give them some space.

“Six no, you two need to bloody calm down.”

“I’m fine!” Noct replied in a huff.

“Hardly!” Ignis snapped right before he reached up and grabbed a fist full of Noct’s hair and pulled, hard.

The action caused Noct to lose his balance and he fell forward only catching himself just before the floor met his face. Surprisingly, this seemed to calm him down. The hand in his hair pulled slightly to get him to sit up.

“Listen carefully highness, where is Prompto?” Ignis asked with his hand still gripping Noct’s hair.

“My apartment,” he whispered, all the fight leaving his system.

“Does he know where you are?”

“No.” The hand in his hair tugged a little harder and Noct swore he heard Ignis growl under his breath. The sight was very surreal since he was still being cradled in Gladio’s arms like a baby.

“Have you been remembering to take your suppressants?”

Noct nodded as best he could with Ignis iron grip holding his head in place. “The little blue bottle, yeah.”

Ignis let out a groan and finally released him. “Highness, the little blue bottle is your vitamin supplement. The orange bottle with the label that says monitrixan is your suppressant.”

“Since when?” Noct asked bewildered.

“Since I told you they changed it three months ago. I think you may be going into a rut.”

“No, no, no that can’t be right, I feel fine, I feel, I --.”

“Like a raging asshole?” Gladio finished.

“Oh gods, no I can’t be going into a rut, I won’t be able to hang out with Prompto. What if I try and take advantage?”

“I think we should discuss this with your boyfriend, in person!” Ignis huffed as he attempted to sit up. “He’s alone in your apartment and upset about something you’ve yet to tell us about.”

The severity of his actions came crashing down right at that moment and Noct couldn’t help but double over on the floor and cry out. He was such a jerk, oh gods, he’d left his best friend and future mate all by himself just because he wanted to yell for no good reason.

“Enough dawdling lets go there now, we can all talk together. I have a feeling I may know what’s going on.”

“You do?” Gladio and he asked in unison.

“Have you not considered how things have been changing between us all this year? How comfortable we all are together, the way Gladio tries to protect Prompto as much as me when we are out. It’s the same with you. Even just now you let me manhandle you. That’s not normal for a non-bonded pair.

“You’re my omega I’m gonna listen to you no matter what,” Noct blurted before he could think clearly. “Shit!” covering his mouth quickly Noct looked between Gladio and Ignis trying to see if they were upset or not.

Gladio barked out a laugh and relaxed slightly. “Damn kid, no wonder you were so protective of Iggy a minute ago.”

“How can I feel like this and not even realize it!” Noct wailed.

“Your emotions are a little out of it at the moment due to your unplanned rut coming. I suggest we go check on Prompto and talk more. Can you call him and see if he answers, he’s probably worried.”

“Yeah ah sure thing,” Noct tried to fish his phone out to call Prompto but he got instantly distracted when Gladio started to help Ignis stand up. Rushing over Noct grabbed Ignis to help.

“Highness, I don’t need help carrying Iggy,” Gladio chided as he fully stood with Ignis in his arms.

“I can walk,” Ignis added dryly.

“We’ll see about that,” said Gladio right before he put Ignis down on his own two feet. Noct again scrambled to keep Ignis upright as he swayed to the side.

“I won’t carry you but you cannot walk unaided,” Gladio admonished.

“Who’s driving?” Ignis asked ignoring Gladio’s comment.

“I had a car take me here, it’s still downstairs.”

“Even better, shall we?” Ignis offered as he tried to walk towards the door. Gladio was there to haul him upright when he stumbled.

“Do alpha scents really affect you that much?” Noct queried suddenly feeling very guilty for being the cause.

“I feel you both a little stronger than I would others since we are so close. Now, enough chit chat we need to go see Prompto.”

Prompto had long since abandoned his cocoon of blankets on the sofa, Noct had left nearly an hour ago and he’d still not returned. It was clear from his scent that he wasn’t mad at Prompto, but something was still off. Resigned to waiting for his friend to return Prompto tried not to worry. Things had taken an unexpected turn recently and he had no idea how to handle his feelings on the matter.

Then when Noct had asked him about it he’d flipped out and run to hide like a little kid. Noct had even offered to call Gladio and Ignis for help, oh, that had really freaked Prompto out. Those were the last two people he wanted to see. The feelings he’d been having were making him question his own relationship with Noct.

When he wouldn’t say what exactly was wrong Noct had thrown a tantrum and stormed off saying he’d fix things and that he’d be back. Unable to think of what Noct could have meant he paced the apartment and waited.

His ring tone broke the silence and Prompto snatched it off the coffee table to answer. “Hello? Noct?”

“Hey, um are you okay?”

“No, where are you? When are you coming back?” Before Noct could answer Prompto heard voices in the background. It was Ignis, shit, Noct had gone to get help despite what he’d said. “Are you bringing Ignis and Gladio over?”

“Yeah we are only a few minutes away, I’m so sorry for running out like that, we need to talk.” Again Prompto heard other voices, it seemed Ignis was saying they all needed to talk and that things would be alright. “I can go home and you guys can talk I don’t want to interrupt.”

“No!” Noct yelped, “Please don’t leave, dude we need to talk I’ve been a total asshole today and like I messed up my suppressants and shit, and I’m going into a rut, and I growled at Gladio earlier, and I tried to protect Ignis from him it’s nuts, I’m going insane. I really need you right now.”

“W-what? What do you mean you tried to protect him?”

“I think it's better if we talk in person, I’m feeling kinda flighty and Ignis helps.”

Prompto’s mind was reeling, Ignis helps? What the hell does that mean? Well, Prompto did actually know what that meant; he’d discovered this himself recently. Ignis being an omega had a really uncanny ability to calm him down with his scent. This combined with Gladio getting suddenly more clingy with him had begun to make Prompto feel things. Good things but things that he was still scared to explore.

“Prompto? Hey Prom, dude don’t bail on me now.”

“I’m here,” Prompto squeaked.

“Do I make you dizzy at all? I made Ignis get dizzy today cause I’m such a dick.” Ignis faint voice broke through telling Noct he was fine and to stop fretting. “I mean Gladio did too but he and I – shit I dunno man—gah -- Prompto I’m a fucking mess right now. I hate going into a rut without warning.”

Suddenly worried about how Noct was going to handle his unwanted rut Prompto began overthinking everything. “I should go, for real if you’re going into a rut then that’s bad for me since I’m not bonded with you yet.”

“Prompto! Don’t leave! I’m serious we are pulling into the garage right now I’ll be up in a minute,” Noct babbled and then he hung up.

Standing frozen in the middle of the living room Prompto waited for Noct and the others to arrive. He’d missed his opportunity to run; now he had to face them all. However, when the sound of keys in the door signaled their arrival he was wholly unprepared for what came in. Noct burst in first looking crazed. The moment he spotted Prompto he ran over and hugged him fiercely. Next Gladio came in with Ignis’ arm draped over his shoulder.

“I assure you I’m fine will you let me go!” The advisor requested trying to pull away.

“No, you’re gonna fall over like you almost did in the garage, and in the elevator, and in the damn hallway,” accused Gladio.

Ignis sighed loudly and steered Gladio closer, once he was within reach Prompto could only brace for the impact of Ignis grabbing his arm for support instead. “Are you alright? Noct refuses to tell us what has happened and I’m very worried.”

Looking at Ignis up close, the man seemed almost drunk. He was flushed in the face and holding him tightly. Forgetting his own issues for a second Prompto began questioning Ignis, he had a very strong desire to make sure Ignis was alright before they did anything else. “Are you hurt?”

“What? No, no, I’m – uh – I think, what did you say in the car dear?” Ignis asked over his shoulder as Gladio wandered away.

“You’re high on pheromones right now.”

“Yes! That!”

“But why? What happened?”

“Noct and Gladio began behaving like little miscreants and caused me to get dizzy.”

“Miscre—what? Please someone tell me what’s going on?!” Prompto cried.

“We were growling at each other and Specs got dizzy and then since we both felt really bad we tried to make him feel better with like a good scent, ya know? And now he’s sorta loopy because of it.”

“Loopy indeed!” Ignis huffed. “Prompto, we need to sit and talk, preferably on the couch so I don’t have to walk.”

Prompto stared idly at the little orange pill bottle on the coffee table, the label still fresh from where it had been ignored in the medicine cabinet for three months. Ignis had just finished explaining what he thought was happening and had gone quiet. If it weren’t for the fact that Noct was holding his right hand and Ignis his left, he may have tried to run away. Thank the six he was a beta, Prompto knew that if he was an omega he’d have had a heart attack long ago. Already having anxiety about certain things would only get amplified being an omega.

Taking a big breath Prompto decided to voice his thoughts, it was what they were all waiting for after all. “Soooo, you’re telling me that little bottle right there triggered this whole thing, right?”

Ignis hummed in agreement but didn’t say anything more.

“Just to double-check, I’m not the only one who feels this way, like we’ve all been feeling it? I know you said Noct called you his omega and he’s already calling me his beta even though we aren’t bonded yet.” Prompto paused to gather courage for what he was about to say. “Um, so, like, you’re saying we could be a – a pack?”

Ignis nodded and squeezed his hand, Gladio smiled and nodded as well. That only left Noct, who wasn’t really in his right mind, but he had to get an answer from him too. Turning to his future alpha he smiled hoping Noct would admit his feelings.

“What? Why –why are you looking at me like that?” He sputtered. “I’m working really hard to not be a total jerk right now, what’d I do now?”

“You’re a lost cause buddy, I know you are acting oddly because of your rut coming but like do you want to be a pack?” Prompto asked hopefully.

“Yes! I mean yeah, sure, I think so,” correct Noct as he looked around at them and blushed.

“I still can’t believe we were all crushing on each other for the past few months and didn’t realize it!” lamented Prompto.

“Yes, well I didn’t exactly pick up on what was happening either; it seems we were all in the dark about our feelings. I do wish we’d noticed sooner though, I hate to think of you feeling upset just because you couldn’t categorize the new feelings you were experiencing.” Ignis sighed as he calmly rubbed his thumb across Prompto’s hand.

“And to think, we’d have still been in the dark if princess over there didn’t screw up his meds and turn into a total dickhead.”

“We’d have found out eventually,” Ignis added quickly. “We simply have a dramatic how we got together story now.”

“Dramatic? More like dimwitted,” joked Gladio.

“Hey! I didn’t mean to mess up stuff I just wanted Prompto to be happy and he was sad and I didn’t know it was because he liked you two and was afraid to tell me and like I didn’t know I felt the same way and I’m sorry!” Noct blabbered.

Prompto was starting to enjoy Noct’s loose-lipped nature but he knew other things came with a rut besides odd behavior patterns. “So ah, what are you going to do about your um, you know, needs?”

“Huh?” Noct asked with a blank look.

“What he always does, watch TV, whine at me for food, and go off to his bedroom to handle things, literally,” Ignis chimed in.

“Can’t Prompto come with me this time though?” Noct pleaded.

“Oh, no highness, you’re not bonded yet so that’s not happening.”

“Yeah, I’m not exactly ready for that either yet, sorry buddy.” He and Noct hadn’t really gotten that intimate and Prompto definitely wanted to save it for when he wasn’t in a rut.

Noct started to whine but gave up and pouted instead.

“I can always help you out if you need,” Gladio teased from his spot in the armchair. “Iggy always says I’m the best, you can find out for yourself.”

“Gahhhhh no, not yet, not ready for that! I’ll be fine on my own.”

“Suit yourself.”

Prompto felt Ignis shift beside him and he turned to see the man watching him intently. “I suppose we will have a few new things to figure out now that we are to be together as a pack. Keeping Noct from going insane during a rut wasn’t what I hoped would be our first activity together but we must start somewhere.”

“I still can’t believe this is happening, we’re gonna be a pack!”

“I’m so happy we all feel the same way,” Ignis added.

“Well at least now we’ll all be mindful to not let Noct skip his suppressant medication,” Prompto replied.

“Yeah, he’s a right little asshole when he’s not in control of his alpha side,” Gladio cut in as he stood and came over to ruffle Prompto’s hair. “I’m gonna go make sure princess’ man cave is ready for later. I know what he’ll need. You two can handle him for now?”

Prompto nodded and looked over to Noct who’d remained silent and was leaning heavily into his shoulder. Maybe the day’s events had finally worn him out. “We’re all in this together now Noct, don’t worry we’ll all take care of you.” https://archiveofourown.org/works/32335489

#ffxv #fanfic #a/b/o dynamics

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thepandapopo · 5 years ago

Text

Absolute Truths

This idea wormed its way into my head and for the life of me I couldn’t get it out.

This oneshot is a little longer than the stuff I usually write (a whopping 8539 words), but I loved every minute of it. I tried editing it to the best of my ability, but honestly I suck at that. No beta, we die like Glenn. #SorryNotSorry #TooSoon ?

Please note this is non canon. The time frame for this is sometime after the Battle of Gronder post time skip and it is a mash up of the GD and BL routes (ie. Dimitri joins Claude and is no longer crazy; Rodrigue still dies. RIP).

Cross posted to ao3.

Pairing: Sylvain x Felix

Warnings: mentions of child abuse and PTSD

Synopsis:

When Felix and Sylvain get hit with a dark magic spell that reverts them back to children, the Resistance Army gets a deeper look into their bond and learn 5 absolute truths that form the foundation of their relationship.

5 undeniable facts of Sylvain and Felix’s relationship.

Word Count: 8539

“Felix!”

Fuck. Sylvain loses sight of him for only a minute but that is all the enemy needs to overwhelm the already bombarded swordmaster.

Pulling the reigns sharply to the left, the Paladin charges across the battlefield, skewering any unfortunate enemies that dare block his way, the lance of ruin glowing like a beacon of fury despite the thick coating of blood on it. The air is heavy with the smell of smoke and dark magic, making it hard to breathe and blurring the red head’s vision. Regardless, Sylvain presses on; determined to get to his best friend in time before the group of mages over the hill finish casting… whatever ominous looking spell they are aiming at Felix.

“Sylvain, get out of here!” Felix shouts angrily, not even pausing his fighting to face the sight of Bella charging her way through the throng with her master astride her.

Shit. Felix cuts down another enemy.

It is never ending. No matter how many falls to his blade, another two enemies take their place. Felix isn’t stupid – he can see the group of mages prepping a dark magic spell in the distance, which makes him even angrier when he spots Sylvain riding to his aid.

Like hell he’ll give his childhood friend another reason to toss himself into harms way. Felix isn’t weak. He doesn’t need protection. And he sure as hell doesn’t want Sylvain to be the one who gets hurt trying to fix his mistakes just because he got a little too cocky and split from the rest of his battalion.

“Fuck.” Felix grunts and pushes his sword hard to disengage the thief that has him in a sword lock. He doesn’t bother to see if he is being pursued and dashes towards Sylvain who is now dismounting a short distance away, Lance of Ruin making quick work of anyone who strays too close for comfort.

Sylvain was undoubtedly within hit range of the spell now. If that idiot insists on being his usual self-sacrificing self, then the least Felix can do is use his own body to shield the older man and take the brunt of the damage.

The tell-tale crackle of magic behind him sets the hair on his nape standing.

Shit. Shitshitshitshitshit.

He isn’t going to make it. Damn Sylvain for being so slow – this is exactly why he keeps telling him to take his training more seriously-!

“Fe!”

The last thing he knows before succumbing to the darkness is a hard chest plate knocking the wind out of him and warm, strong arms that remind him of summers spent with a heart lighter than air.

----

1. Sylvain always has, and always will protect Felix until the day he dies.

Leonie is one of two on the first shift of babysitting duty.

Undeniably, the orange haired paladin would be the first to admit that she wasn’t the greatest with kids, however there is only so much the tiny, and thankfully unconscious, Fraldarius boy can do given his current predicament.

No one really knows what happened after the enemy spell envelops Felix and Sylvain, the larger of the two curled protectively around his companion as they fall. No one even knows what the spell is.

But what they do know is that now, instead of a regular sized Felix Hugo Fraldarius and Sylvain Jose Gautier, they have a chubby cheeked blue haired cherub and an unfairly-cute-even-as-a-child ginger.

It is in the middle of bemoaning her poor luck at drawing straws when the mini-Felix begins to stir and she feels panic clawing its way up her throat.

“Ngghh…” small, unscarred hands balled into fist come up to rub at bleary amber eyes before they widen almost comically as they take in his surroundings.

“Uhh… hey.” His gaze snaps towards Leonie and she can feel her terror rising with mini Felix’s hysteria, clearly evident by the shiny glaze beginning to cloud his eyes and the fat crocodile tears gathering at the edges of his almond eyes.

“It’s okay, Felix. It’s just me.” She reaches out a hand tentatively in a placating gesture, but quickly withdraws back as young Felix lets out a squeak and scurries as far back into the corner of the bed as he can get, taking his older self’s wool Fraldarius crest blanket with him, as if it could shield him.

“Wh-wh-who are you?” The poor thing is absolutely terrified and damn it, Leonie wants to comfort him, but she is equally as distressed here and this is exactly why she didn’t want to babysit.

“It’s me, Leonie. You don’t… you don’t recognize me?”

It comes out sounding more like a statement than a question.

It’s so painfully obvious that little Felix has no idea who she is.

Which means he doesn’t have his memories.

Which means they are down two of their best generals.

Which means they are well and truly fucked.

So, Leonie does the only thing she can logically think to do.

“Come on,” She says, rising from her bedside chair and reaching for his arm. “We need to go tell Linheartd that the situation is much worse than we had originally thought.” But as soon as her hand wraps around his forearm, Felix screams.

“Oh shi-! Felix! Calm down, I’m not going to hurt you!”

If anything, this just seems to have the opposite effect and the wails increase to near piercing.

Leonie thinks it may be a trick of her mind, and probably her ears because holy crap does little Felix have a set of lungs on him, but she is pretty sure that Felix is screaming out a name.

Specifically, a name belonging to a certain red head that is, the last time she checked anyways, unconscious two doors down from his room and currently being watched over by Caspar.

“Fe!” The door bursts open and suddenly there is chaos.

Was being watched over by Caspar, Leonie amends in her mind.

“Get back here!” The blue haired warrior lunges and swipes his arm out trying to catch mini Sylvain who is slipperier than a fish in water, using his short height to duck between legs and launch himself onto the bed.

“Leave Fe alone!” Honey brown eyes that are so very familiar yet also so different, are glaring holes into Leonie and Caspar, proudly defiant and blazing with determination. Short arms stuffed into the smallest adult shirt they could find on short notice stretch out protectively, completely shielding Felix from sight.

“S-Sylvain,” comes the little sob from behind him and the older boy spares a second to throw a comforting smile behind him. “Don’t worry, Fe. I’ll protect you.” And Goddess, he sounds so genuine and earnest that it makes Leonie wonder what happened to cause their Sylvain to hide behind fake laughs and charming lilts of the tongue.

“Sorry, Leonie.” Caspar is gasping for air like he has just run a marathon. “I tried to keep him in his room but as soon as he heard Felix screaming, he was out faster than I could blink.”

“Ugh. Just go get Ingrid and the Professor.”

----

2. Sylvain hates himself and his crest, but Felix likes him in spite of it.

A day later finds Ingrid watching over the five year old Felix (“What?! He’s five? But he’s so tiny.” “Don’t let him hear you say that or he’ll cry again.”) and seven year old Sylvain.

“Just stay in this area, okay?” She calls out over the din of raucous laughter echoing throughout the courtyard. “I don’t want you two wandering off and getting into trouble.”

The play wrestling pauses for a brief moment and little Sylvain sticks out a tongue at her.

“We don’t get into trouble! You’re just a party pooper!”

“Yeah! Party pooper!”

Shoving down the urge to smack her childhood friends into the next moon, Ingrid settles for watching with pursed lips as Felix dissolves into giggles, Sylvain’s grabby hands finding purchase in his sides and tickling him relentlessly. The look of such carefree happiness on their faces makes her heart clench and eyes sting.

If Ingrid is being completely honest… she misses this.

She remembers what it was like not carrying around a broken heart for a man buried six feet under, his remains not even whole enough to bring home. Back when she could play wrestle with Fe, Sylvie, and Dima in the dirt and then go to Glenn to kiss her knee better when one of them inevitably accidentally activated their crest and used too much strength, resulting in tears and scrapes and bruises.

It doesn’t do her any good to dwell on the past.

The dead should be left to rest, and the living should move on.

For an emotionally constipated guy, Felix is dead on with his philosophy.

Though she has long come to terms with her betrothed’s death, the small sliver of envy she has for her two oldest friends still lingers in the deepest, darkest recesses of her heart.

They’re lucky that they still have each other, even though they spend half the time bickering and denying their feelings.

“Is that the Gautier boy?”

Two monastery staff members stop beneath the path archway and look with undisguised admiration.

“So handsome at such a young age!”

“And I hear he’s incredibly charming too.”

Ingrid knows that Sylvain and hear them. He has always been keen of hearing, especially when it involves others gossiping about himself, for better or for worse.

Felix takes advantage of Sylvain’s distraction to get the upper hand and rolls on top, completely oblivious to the onlookers.

“If I were his mother, I would have secured him a betrothed as soon as he was tested for a crest.”

A hum of agreement. “Yes. His family is blessed with good looks so it would not be hard to secure an advantageous match. The Gautier line will likely continue on stronger than ever with such a prized heir.”

“Sylvain? Why did you stop?”

Felix is all wide eyes and adorable pouty cheeks, staring confusedly down at his best friend underneath him who has gone strangely silent with a strangled expression.

“Don’t you have duties to attend to?”

The two gossipmongers snap to attention at Ingrid’s sharp tone, her expression clearly telling them to get the hell out of here or risk facing her wrath.

With rushed replies of “yes, sorry miss!” and “our apologies”, they scurry off down the pathway and disappear around the corner.

But unfortunately, the damage is already done.

“Sylvain? What’s wrong? Why are you sad?”

Gently, the older boy extricates himself from Felix’s death grip of a grapple and stands up with his eyes cast downwards. “Sorry, Fe. I… I don’t want to play anymore.”

“What? What do you mean? Where are you going?”

“I’m tired. I want to go back to our room.”

It only takes one look at Sylvain’s expression before Felix is latching his fists into the fabric of Sylvain’s pants with a scowl on his face.

“You’re lying to me. Why are you lying?”

“I’m not lying, Fe! I don’t want to play anymore.”

“We’re best friends aren’t we?”

“Well, yeah, of course we are.”

“Best friends don’t lie to each other.”

Ingrid has patiently watched the exchange between Felix and Sylvain to this very moment, hoping that they can sort out this argument without her intervening like she always did as a child, but through years of experience, she can sense that one of them is about to snap and she would very much like to avoid that.

“You know the only reason we’re best friends is because our parents are friends and we both have crests.”

There it is.

It’s absolutely heart breaking how Sylvain has already learned to self destruct at the tender age of seven. If Miklan were still alive, Ingrid would skewer him a thousand times over for instilling the mantra of ‘you’re not worthy of love’ into Sylvain’s head.

“Hey guys, do you wanna go-“

“You’re a stupid head if that’s what you think.” Felix’s interruption shocks her. His usually bright amber eyes are fixed in a watery glare leveled at the boy opposite him. Right now, Ingrid may as well be invisible for all Felix cares.

“What?”

“You’re a stupid head!”

Sylvain looks absolutely affronted.

“No, I’m not!”

“Yeah, you are!” a few tears have managed to slip beyond the barrier and trail down Felix’s cheeks. “I don’t care that our parents know each other. And I don’t care about any stupid crests.”

Felix marches up to Sylvain with all the anger he can muster in his five year old glory and reaches up to smoosh his cheeks together. “I’d still pick you to be my best friend in the whole wide world because you’re funny and nice and I’m always happier with you than Ingrid or Dima.”

Sylvain can only stand there with his lips parted in round ‘o’ from his cheeks being pushed together and a dazed look in his eye. Felix takes this as a sign to continue his little tirade.

“And I know you’re smart so you should stop being such a stupid head because I don’t care what you think. You’re my best friend and I’ll always pick you over any stupid crest.”

“Fe…”

She recognizes that tone. Ingrid looks away then because she fears that if she doesn’t, the part of her heart that belongs to Glenn might just twist its way into her throat and choke her with envy.

Sylvain is giving Felix that look that she has seen many times throughout their lives whenever she watches her two friends from afar. It’s one that everyone, except for Felix, has seen a million times and knows that to Sylvain, the world around him has fallen away except for one person.

“You’re my best friend, Sylvain. So, don’t lie to me.”

For the first time since the gossipers appeared, Sylvain lets a smile slip through.

“Okay. I promise.”

Felix eyes him warily and searches for any hint of a lie in Sylvain’s expression. Once satisfied, he loops his own pinky around the one outstretched to him.

“Good. Now let’s go play Knights and Bandits!”

Perhaps it is because Felix is always looking ahead that he never sees how Sylvain looks at him like he was the one who hung the stars and moon in his dark sky, illuminating his life with happiness and love.

----

3. Felix feels so much and Sylvain is the only one who understands him even without words.

A collective sigh echoes throughout the monastery when they find out that mini Felix and mini Sylvain aren’t too picky with their food.

Granted, even as a child, Felix shows a proclivity towards eating meat; but with a little friendly jostling from his best friend, even the youngest Fraldarius son can be convinced to eat his brussel sprouts.

Which is exactly why Claude is so baffled when Felix starts to protest eating during mealtimes.

“What do you mean he won’t eat?”

He’s well aware that he probably sounds like an idiot, if the exasperated look Lorenz is giving him is anything to go by; but they haven’t had any trouble before so it makes absolutely no sense that Felix would start being picky now.

“It’s exactly as I said,” Lorenz frowns. “We were all simply sitting together enjoying a meal, when Felix stopped eating and refused to finish his dinner. I’ve been told this is now the third occurrence in a row that his has happened.”

“Was he full?” Byleth pauses from looking through some supply requests to chime into their conversation. Although she has not outright said anything, Claude knows his love well enough to tell that she is stressed about their current predicament. Felix throwing a silent protest against food is just one more thing to add to her pile of worries that she doesn’t need.

“Don’t worry, Teach,” Claude winks and flashes his signature grin. “I’ll get to the bottom of this. You just worry about securing our supplies for the next moon, yeah?” His chair lets out a deafening screech as it drags across the floor, drowning out any protests their former professor may have and providing Claude the distraction he needs to usher Lorenz out of the room with him.

“Claude, are you sure you know what you are doing?” The doubt rolling off Lorenz would have offended a lesser man, but Claude has spent his life being the underdog and he lets the words bounce harmlessly off him. “Felix is not an enemy to be outsmarted. He is simply a child who only adheres to emotion.”

“I am aware of that, yes.”

“Then why do you look as though you are about to hatch a scheme?”

Because he is.

And although Felix is not an ‘enemy’, per say, doesn’t mean that Claude can’t use his usual tactics of watching and observing his opponent until he has hatched a plot to take them down. Hence, leading to Claude’s current position tucked away in the far corner of the mess hall during the following breakfast.

Even on his off days, Claude is always watching and learning. He knows the favourite foods of all his fellow comrades in arms and he also knows whom everyone’s preferred companion is.

There is very little that escapes his notice, and the Resistance Army leader is confident that he will have a plan by sundown at the very least.

It is a little past 8am when the two children sleepily trudge their way into the dining hall with Bernadetta, their ward for the day, close behind them.

Nothing seems particularly strange or odd when they join the line to retrieve their meal; and nothing remarkable happens either when Bernie leads them to the only empty table left in the middle of the hall.

“Good morning, Bernadetta!” Raphael greets cheerily and shuffles his mountain of food over to join the trio at their table. “Good morning, Felix, Sylvain!”

The little ones mumble back a greeting, but their voices are lost in the din of the morning meal chatter.

So far, so good. Felix is still eating his porridge (albeit with an adorable frown on his face) and talking animatedly about goddess knows what with Sylvain, who occasionally turns to answer a question from the adults.

“Oh, good morning, Bernadetta, Felix, Sylvain!”

Slowly but surely, the table begins to fill as their friends meander into the building in search of food to start their day. Greetings are exchanged and unsurprisingly, Felix and Sylvain garner a lot of attention due to their current forms. Sylvain, ever the chatterbox that he is, fields most of the questions; Whether it is because he is being considerate of his quieter friend or if he simply relishes in the attention is debatable, but Claude cannot help but notice how his eyes constantly dart back towards Felix who grows increasingly frustrated.

“Oh, you’re just too adorable!” Annette’s squeal of delight reaches even Claude’s remote corner and he assumes that the wince he sees from Felix is due to the sheer volume of the orange haired mage. Sylvain, the current object of attention, just flashes her his prize winning smile; his dimples making him look even more endearing than he already is.

The adults gathered around the children don’t even notice that Felix has stopped eating. Nor do they see Sylvain quietly reach below the table to grab Felix’s smaller hand in what looks to be a gesture of comfort.

In fact, it takes another five minutes of cooing and fawning before Raphael, of all people, notices that Felix is now glaring with teary eyes at his bowl of half eaten porridge.

“What’s wrong, little buddy? Not feeling well?”

Immediately the attention shifts to him and the effects are just as disastrous as Claude predicts.

“I’m not hungry.” Some of the porridge finds its way onto the table as Felix pushes his bowl away with such ferocity, Claude is half surprised it doesn’t completely tip over.

“What do you mean you’re not hungry?” Annette frowns. “This is the fourth time you’ve left a meal unfinished. Are you not feeling well? Do you need to go see Mercedes?”

“No. I don’t wanna eat anymore.”

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay, Felix? We just want to make sure you’re not getting sick.”

“I’m fine.”

It’s a big fat lie and anyone with half a brain can hear the distress and frustration in the blue haired boy’s voice. One lone tear manages to squeeze its way out of Felix’s water logged eyes and that’s all it takes for the table to burst into a flurry.

Claude almost feels bad for Felix as the adults descend on him like a pack of vultures, all of them crowding him and trying to coax the reason for his distress out of him. The Almyran prince has half a mind to go over and rescue his friend in arms from a situation that is probably in his top ten worst fears, but before he can even get out of his seat, Sylvain is already bounding out of his chair with a teary Felix in tow.

Sylvain shouts something about ‘Knights and Bandits’ and they’re out the southern doors before Bernadetta can even process what has happened.

Felix’s half eaten bowl of porridge sits on the table completely forgotten.

----

At lunch, Claude decides to test a hypothesis.

He asks Mercedes and Hilda to sit with the kids at lunch and pay special attention to Felix.

To everyone else, he gives them strict orders to leave their table alone.

Satisfied with how his experiment is set up, Claude finally seats himself back in his observatory spot with his own lunch sitting in front of him.

He’s not expecting amazing results. In fact, he’s not expecting his first hypothesis to be a success at all, but he wants to try it none the less because there is always the possibility that mini Felix fundamentally operates much differently than the Felix that he is used to.

What he doesn’t expect is for Felix to immediately shut down the minute Hilda tries to engage him in some conversation about the games him and Sylvain play in the courtyard.

Today’s lunch special is Daphnel Stew and Claude has it on good authority that it is a favourite of Felix’s (technically Dimitri is a reliable source, right? They were childhood friends after all).

Sylvain tries his best to jump into the conversation and pull some of the attention to himself, but Hilda is every bit as smooth of a talker as Claude is; deftly maneuvering the conversation back to Felix no matter what Sylvain does.

This time, it is Felix that reaches for Sylvain’s hand under the table.

Except instead of just holding Sylvain’s hand, Felix starts to pull at it every time Mercedes or Hilda asks him a question, as if pleading for his friend to save him.

At least Claude could now say for sure that Felix is not, and never was, a fan of being the center of attention.

When the first afternoon bell tolls signaling the end of lunch, Felix’s stew remains uneaten and untouched. On the way out of the hall, Claude looks the other way and pretends not to notice when Sylvain steals an apple from the pantry.

His experiment doesn’t exactly succeed, but he cannot write it off as a failure either. The information gathered from his two observation sessions is plentiful and a solution is forming within his mind even as he makes his way up to the war room to meet Byleth for their afternoon strategy session.

By the time he pushes open the door to his usual haunt, Claude is absolutely certain of two truths.

One, that Sylvain knows Felix better than anyone could ever hope to compare, and two, Felix Fraldarius is incredibly lucky to have an attentive best friend like Sylvain because stars above, does he suck with using his words.

----

When the hour before dinner time rolls around, Claude makes sure to talk to everyone he passes by and give them the order that no one is to approach Felix and Sylvain’s tables at mealtimes anymore. He tells them to pass the word around and it doesn’t take long before the entire monastery is in the know of their Leader’s command.

“Care for company?” Byleth smiles and sets her tray down beside his own without waiting for a reply.

Claude does a quick survey of the area to make sure no one is looking before leaning in to land a quick peck on Byleth’s cheek. Joy flutters in his stomach at her rising blush and he merely laughs and winks at her stuttered protests.

“Check it out,” Claude quickly changes the subject and nods his head over to where Bernadetta sits exhausted with a now cheerful Felix and Sylvain. The latter nodding enthusiastically to their conversation with the occasional laugh and both of their plates near devoid of food.

A tiny rush of pride swells when he sees the relived expression on Byleth’s face.

“Told ya I’d take care of it.”

Underneath the table, he flips his palm facing upward so that he can intertwine his fingers with her searching ones.

“Yes, you did.” The unspoken thanks lingers in the air between them, louder than the constant buzz of activity in the room.

For the first time in a while, the former professor looks more at ease. And Claude, being the shit stirrer that he is, cannot help but toss a little fuel into the fire.

“So… who do you think will wear white at the wedding? Between the two of them, I think Felix is the better choice.”

“What?!”

----

4. Felix has an unwavering faith and belief in Sylvain that he’s not afraid to stubbornly stand by to the bitter end.

“Annie, are you sure this is a good idea?”

If Mercedes is concerned, then Lysithea is absolutely certain that no, this is most definitely not a good idea.

They are at the part of the training grounds where the various magic users can come to practice and hone their spells. The ground is singed with charred marks from stray thunder and fire spells, the black streaks contrasting starkly with the pale stone underneath. To the side, there is also a sand pit where mages can practice some more destructive flame based spells.

“I’m just a little curious, is all!” Annette whispers back. “I know Sylvain is really good with magic even though he never uses it. He was the one who helped me understand that magic formula that I was stuck on for a week, after all. I was thinking maybe he might show an aptitude for Reason as a child.”

“That’s fine and all; but I’m not really sure how safe it is to teach a child how to conjure a fire spell. That just seems like a recipe for disaster.”

The orange hair mage cannot help but look slightly put out by Lysithea’s comment.

Yes, maybe it wasn’t the safest idea ever… but Annette just really wants to find out the extent of Sylvain’s inherent abilities. Even after she makes him promise to take his training more seriously, she still feels like he is holding back on her when they are paired together.

“What kinda magic are you gonna show us?” Felix is eager and bouncing on his toes. The House Fraldarius specializes in swordplay, not magic, so this is a treat for him and he can barely contain his excitement.

“Oh well, I was thinking we could start off with a basic fire spell!”

“Oooh, fire!”

Annette really hopes that Felix doesn’t have a penchant for pyrotechnics.

As much of a bad idea as this is, Lysithea can’t exactly bring herself to leave them in case something goes terribly wrong. She is the strongest, most advanced Gremory the Resistance Army has; with her around, she’s confident that the worst that could happen would be some singed eyebrows and possibly an impromptu need for a haircut. But even that is an outcome that she is hoping to avoid.

Once the target is set up, Sylvain and Felix eagerly make their way over to the sidelines to watch Annette demonstrate a basic fire spell.

It’s nothing special really. Even the older Felix and Sylvain could probably cast it without much problem, but to their younger versions, the small ball of fire is so grand and spectacular that it warrants oo’s and ah’s and enthusiastic applause.

“Wow! That is so cool! Isn’t that so cool, Sylvain?”

Felix is pulling on Sylvain’s sleeve and the older boy nods emphatically with admiration shining in his eyes.

“Do you think you could do it too?”

Lysithea is startled to hear the question Felix asks Sylvain. Of course, Annette was already planning to ask the Gautier boy to attempt the spell, but that was out of curiosity.

From the shining look on Felix’s face, Lysithea knows that he is asking because in his mind, there is nothing that his smart, talented best friend in the whole wide world cannot do.

“Magic is difficult to learn and takes time. It can take years for some to learn just the basics.” She cuts in before Sylvain can answer.

She doesn’t want Felix to unwittingly trap him with an unrealistic expectation that he cannot meet and she figures it is better to disappoint him now rather than allow the red head to try and then feel guilty when he disappoints his friend.

“Sylvain is smart. I bet Sylvain could do it!”

Felix is pouting in that way that they are all quickly learning means ‘I’m right and you can’t convince me otherwise’.

“I’m sure Sylvain is very smart!” Mercedes agrees and gives the boys her best placating smile. “But I’m not so sure that a person could learn how to cast a Fire spell in one day! Why, it took Annie and I at least a week of practicing before we could do it!”

“Yep, I remember I almost burned my eyebrows off the first time I tried! But I can teach you the basics maybe and then we can bring you here again next time to practice?”

The urge to verbally reprimand the warlock for her relentless pursuit to satisfy her own curiosity rises and Lysithea has to physically clutch her biceps to stop herself from bursting.

Fine. If they were so eager to set themselves down this path, then so be it.

“Yeah!” Felix is literally vibrating with excitement and Sylvain looks nervous but determined to not let his admirer down.

Heaving a sigh, Lysithea moves to settle next to Mercedes who sends her an apologetic smile.

It was going to be a long afternoon.

----

Unsurprisingly, Felix does not do so well with learning the basics.

The diagrams and symbols are a little too much on the side of complex and it becomes apparent rather quickly that there is a reason the Fraldarius men carve through the battlefield with swords instead of magic.

“Aw, it’s okay Fe! You’re still the best with a sword anyways. You don’t need magic!” Sylvain ruffles his hair and smiles. “You’ll always beat me at swordplay.”

The small admission is enough to cheer Felix up and after a bit more nudging from the older boy, he runs off to play around with the wooden practice swords they have on the other side of the training room while Annette and Sylvain continue to work on creating basic magic circles.

It’s only after the third hour and Mercedes has long left to attend to various chores that Lysithea turns to watch Felix go through rather crude sword forms instead.

“You need to spread your feet farther apart.” Using her own foot, she nudges Felix’s left heel to the side to widen his stance. “Try striking again now.”

The wooden sword wobbles a bit in its trajectory, but the swing is undoubtedly much better than before. The sheer delight that lights up in Felix’s eyes almost makes Lysithea laugh out loud because she recognizes it as the same gleam she sees in the older Felix’s eyes when he executes a particularly hard maneuver.

“Why aren’t you watching Sylvain and Annie?”

For a five year old, Felix is incredibly perceptive.

Rather than lie to him, Lysithea opts for honesty because she is sure that’s what older Felix would have wanted.

“I don’t think he’ll succeed.”

Felix frowns. “You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do. I know how hard it is to learn magic. I’m sure Sylvain is very intelligent, but it takes a lot of hard work to use Reason.”

“Sylvain can do it. I know he can.”

She sighs and turns a baleful eye down at Felix. “You’re a stubborn one aren’t you.”

“Glenn said that to me too when he didn’t believe me that I could stay up all night waiting for Sylvain.”

“And did you prove him wrong?”

Felix turns to full face her, expression full of gravity.

“Yup.” The dead seriousness of his tone looses Lysithea’s first laugh of the day and she cannot help but be drawn towards this little boy, the same way she was drawn to his older self.

Deigning not to continue a lost conversation, the cake loving Gremory opts to turn back and watch the progress that the other two have made, leaving Felix muttering to himself about his steadfast belief in his best friend.

----

“Alright, let’s see what you’ve got!”

The sun is setting and it is nearly time for dinner by the time Sylvain and Annette break away from Magic and Sorcery: Vol 1. to actually put some practice to the theory they have spent all day studying.

“Now, don’t be too disappointed if you can’t get it.” Annette says while moving out of the way. “You did just learn the basics and it takes a lot of practice!”

Lysithea has not moved from her perch from a nearby bench. She’s still extremely skeptical that Sylvain will manage to do very much at all. Yes, it is true that he had a budding talent for Reason during their academy days, but Sylvain hardly ever applied himself to any of his studies. The professor had to literally force him to attend one on one magic lessons with her before his aptitude for spells finally emerged.

Although, she muses, this younger Sylvain seems to be more enthusiastic to participate in things he was interested in. Even now, the scrunched up look of concentration on his face is indication enough that the Sylvain Lysithea is used to is a much different creature than the one before her currently.

House Ordelia does not really have any established trade routes with the Gautier territory, but the Ordelia heir has heard enough to know that the current Margrave is an arrogant, crest-obsessed prick.

It doesn’t take a prodigy to connect the dots and surmise that Sylvain’s carefree attitude and refusal to apply himself to anything is a product of his father’s suffocating expectations.

Fuck Margrave Gautier.

Maybe Lysithea does want Sylvain to prove her wrong and succeed; then at least he can go back home and light his father’s breeches on fire.

She’s only slightly disappointed when her expectations prove correct and the best Sylvain can conjure is one tiny flicker from a lone flame in his hand. However, it is still much more than she thought Sylvain would be able to do and for that, she is genuinely impressed.

Annette is also very much awestruck with Sylvain’s quick learning and happily informs the boy of this all the way to the dining hall. Sylvain is uncharacteristically quiet as he listens to the older mage praise him, but he is not yet skilled enough in the art of hiding behind a mask and the slight downward tilt of his lips does not go unnoticed.

“You really did an amazing job learning so much in such a short time, Sylvain! Don’t be too disappointed that you couldn’t do it.”

Sylvain gives a weak smile in return, but it is Felix who ultimately responds; one hand clasped tightly in the Gautier’s and the other one balled into a fist.

“Sylvain can do it. Just watch.”

----

Dinner passes without much fanfare and the boys are eventually tucked in for the night. Claude and Byleth have long decided that a full-time night chaperone is no longer necessary; although occasionally, one of their friends will peek into the room in the dead of night before they retire, but very rarely do they find anything wrong that requires their attention. A week has already passed with no incident, so there should be no need to exhaust their soldiers by keeping them up at night.

Except this time, when Petra nudges the door to their room open – being extremely careful not to open it too fast lest the hinges squeak – she does not see any sign of Felix or Sylvain anywhere.

It is the dead of night, but Garreg Mach Monastery blazes alive with a flurry of panic at the toll of the emergency bell.

“You’re absolutely sure no one saw them leave their room?”

Seteth slams his palms on the table and interrogates the night shift guards; his brows furrowed and mind racing a mile a minute.

If the enemy has somehow managed to sneak into Garreg Mach and kidnap the children, then they are well and truly fucked. They may have to abandon their home base or at the very least do an extensive investigation of their current ranks and re-evaluate their current passive defense.

“There were no signs that a struggle was happening.” Petra voices from her place around the war table. “I am having confidence that they left with willingness.”

“Goddess, please keep them safe.” The situation leaves a bad taste in Flayn’s mouth; it is much too reminiscent of when she was kidnapped and although it has been years since the incident, the memories still plague her.

Byleth’s voice leaves no room for discussion, “everyone split up and search the grounds. Most of our facilities are locked up at night so that should help limit the number of places we need to search.”

Everyone dashes out of the room with their orders and branch off at the second floor corridor. Those once belonging to the Black Eagle house comb through the main hall while the former Blue Lion students check all surrounding independent buildings; the Golden Deer fanning out to cover the outdoor grounds of the monastery.

An hour passes. Then another. And another.

Soon it is 3 in the morning and the panic is truly beginning to set in, giving rise to an unsettling fear clawing its way up from the depths of the night.

“Dimitri, Dedue! Have you found anything?” Ingrid pants and skids to a halt just below the stairs to the Sauna; the rest of her Blue Lion classmates run up to join her and debrief their findings.

“Nothing,” Dedue’s tone is flat as usual but his strangled expression is enough to betray his underlying worry. “We have searched all the open buildings and the grounds. There is no sign of them at all.”

Annette is near tears now and Mercedes places a hand on her shoulder, offering her silent support even while she herself is fiddling with her shawl, an attempt to keep her mind occupied before it spirals.

“It’s not like them to run away,” Ashe frowns. “Did anything happen today? Were they acting weird at all?”

“Not really. All we did was practice magic at the training grounds.”

Mercedes frowns. “Perhaps they left something there and went back to retrieve it?”

“The training grounds should be locked at 11PM. No one should be able to get in or out until sunrise.” Dimitri shakes his head.

“Well then we’re clearly running out of ideas here!” Ingrid throws up her hands in frustration and rakes them through her hair which is on the verge of looking like a bird’s nest. “We’ve checked the dining hall and the greenhouse but –“

“Your Majesty.” Dedue’s raised voice cuts Ingrid short and they look over to see the doors to the training grounds swing open slowly with a slight push of the man’s hands. “The doors were not locked as we thought.”

It takes only a heartbeat for them to scramble through the large wooden doors and down the hallway, their rushed footsteps echoing like thunder in the stone corridor.

“Oh Goddess. I smell smoke. Does anyone else smell smoke?” If her heartbeat accelerates any more, Annette is pretty sure she will have a heart attack.

“It’s coming from over there!” Their King leads the charge towards the magical training arena where the smell of smoke is the thickest.

When they burst into the open area, they are prepared for the worst. Weapons are drawn and hands raised with spells on the tips of tongues, but the sight they are greeted with is enough to shock them into stasis.

There in the middle of the sandpit, hunched over and panting hard, albeit with a brilliant grin on his face, is Sylvain. The practice dummy a few feet in front of him is alit with flames, illuminating the room with an orange glow, casting shadows along the stone walls that flicker like a live audience.

And off to the side bundled up in a woolen teal blanket that they all recognize, is a tired, but extremely proud looking Felix Fraldarius staring directly at the newcomers.

“I told you he could do it!”

----

5. Sylvain has given Felix all the pieces of his fragile, fractured heart, even if he isn’t aware he possesses it.

Although once his greatest secret, Ignatz no longer hides his passion for art from his fellow Resistance Army members.

It’s not uncommon these days for people to find him at random places in the monastery with his art supplies sketching away at preserving a moment in time on blank paper forevermore.

Today, he is sitting on a bench next to a large oak tree, just a stone’s throw away from the main grounds. Beneath the shade and tucked between two large roots lie Sylvain and Felix, both completely tuckered out from their earlier attempts at climbing the towering tree. Sylvain is starfished on the ground with his arms stretched wide; to his left, Felix lays curled away from him with his head pillowed on the outstretched limb.

Sylvain and Felix have been the talk of the monastery for the past week and it is pretty obvious why. It’s not every day that you see two high ranking generals revert back to their child forms. Especially the most notorious bother-me-and-I’ll-bite-your-head-off and if-it-breathes-I’ll-flirt-with-it Generals to boot.

Of course, stories of their shenanigans and troublemaking usually fill the daily meal conversations, but there is one topic that floats above all else; the one that makes the maids in the kitchen giggle and even the burliest of knights crack a smile:

It is clear that even from a young age, Sylvain Jose Gautier and Felix Hugo Fraldarius are absolutely smitten with each other.

The two are inseparable and Ignatz is pretty sure that even a blind man would be able to see the absolute trust and unspoken devotion they have towards each other.

Ignatz has spent the day watching Felix and Sylvain, not just because it’s his turn to babysit, but also because he is fascinated with their bond. He had once thought that the Goddess was the most beautiful thing in the world, but the rawness and purity of their relationship fills him with more piety and awe than any portrait or statue of Sothis ever did.

It is like they are two parts of a well-oiled machine. Where one gives way, the other will step in to fill the gap; whenever Sylvain’s insecurities flare up, Felix is always there to chase the demons away with clumsy words and a physical display of affection, using his own body to ground his best friend and keep him close. Likewise, whenever tears well up in the youngest Fraldarius’ eyes (which is unfortunately quite often), Sylvain is there to wipe away the salty tracks and light up Felix’s heart with a smile warmer and brighter than sunshine.

Ignatz’s original plans were to draw the oak tree and the beautiful meadow of primrose flowers, but it seems that there will be a last minute change in muse.

Taking up his piece of charcoal, he begins the outline of what he thinks will be his fondest work to date.

Ignatz doesn’t know how long he spends sitting on that bench hunched over his sketchbook in silence with only the occasional birdsong floating through the silence. It’s so calm and peaceful that he doesn’t even notice that Sylvain has begun to stir until he looks up to find one of his subjects in a different position.

Leonie had warned him that Sylvain has a tendency towards nightmares. She had discovered that unfortunate fact in the first three days when each time she tip-toed into their room to check up on them, she found Sylvain wide awake with wild terror in his eyes and a sleepy Felix clinging to him comfortingly.

Strangely enough, Sylvain also does not startle awake from his nightmares. Instead, he slowly rouses himself as if from a deep sleep and if it weren’t for the glaze of lingering fear in his eyes, none would be able to tell that he had just woken up from a night terror.

That same glazed look is now flickering rapidly around him as if searching for the shadow of a monster that exists only within his mind.

“Sylvain…?”

Wild brown eyes finally settle on steady molten amber ones.

“Fe.”

“It’s okay, Sylvain. I’m here...”

Felix yawns and shuffles around until he is half wrapped around Sylvain with his left hand settling over Sylvain’s pounding heart.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you…” Small hands curl around the material of Sylvain’s shirt in a death grip. Felix’s loyalty and protectiveness so painfully evident even when the boy himself is half asleep. He manages to cling to the realm of the conscious for a little while longer, until the rapid thump thump thump of Sylvain’s heart slows to a steady lulling rhythm, pulling Felix back down under the veil of sleep.

Ignatz has silently watched this entire exchange and to be honest, he’s not really sure that Sylvain or Felix even remember that he is here with them. He cannot bring himself to make his presence known, so he continues to watch and observe.

He watches as the fear that was once in Sylvain’s eyes slowly recede again, the monsters inside his head vanquished in the company of his best friend. It only takes one more glance at the boy cuddled up to him with a hand protectively hovered over his heart to melt away the chains that bind him to the expectations of the people around him.

Here under this oak tree in a field of blooming young love, there is no crest or Miklan or nobility. There is only Felix and Sylvain.

Sylvain holds onto that truth as he wraps his free arm around the younger boy, tucking him more securely under his chin, letting the cool summer breeze lull him back to a dreamless sleep.

Ignatz pulls out a new page and starts a fresh outline. It takes him a little longer than anticipated to finish his drawing, but he figures it’s not such a bad thing since he likes this new version much better.

Later, as he trails after the now energetic boys back towards the monastery, Ignatz tucks his newest masterpiece securely under his arm, being very careful not to smudge the drawing or crease the paper.

After all, Claude did mention something about a wedding and Ignatz thinks that his drawing will make a fine gift.

----

Bonus: They’re just two idiots in love.

“Go away. Can’t you see I’m trying to enjoy my meal?”

“Aww, don’t be like that, Felix! You know, the younger you was much cuter. Definitely less prickly, too.” Dorothea pokes his cheek and snatches her hand away before Felix can stab it with his steak knife.

It’s been roughly a week since Felix and Sylvain have returned to their normal sizes, the dark magic having run its course and fizzling out without so much as a final spark. To the rest of the Army, this is a joyous occasion as it means that two of their best generals are now back to normal and can command them again. But to the last class of the academy… it is bittersweet.

Of course, they want their friends to return to normal. But that also means that Felix will go back to hissing and spitting with all the fury of a spooked cat and Sylvain will go back to seducing any individual that makes eye contact with him for longer than half a second.

“Better do as he says, Thea. Felix’s looking extra grumpy today and we wouldn’t want you to lose a pretty little finger.” Sylvain winks at her as he sets down his own meal and settles in the seat across from the swordsman.

The opera singer snorts, “right back to the flirting as usual. Save your hollow words for some other girl.”

“Ouch. Give a guy a break! I just recovered from a dark magic spell after all. Doesn’t that warrant some pity?”

“The only pity is that you immediately lost all your innocent and cute appeal when you reverted back to your regular body.”

Felix scowls at them, “if you insist on continuing your flirting, I’ll just eat my meal elsewhere.” He moves to stand but Sylvain is quicker and grabs his wrist, preventing him from moving.

“I’m sorry. I’ll stop. Just stay, okay? Please? For me, Fe?”

Sylvain is looking at Felix with that expression which he knows he cannot resist and Dorothea takes this opportunity to slip away while the two engage in a silent conversation with only their eyes.

“Fine.”

Their meal continues with little fanfare and easy conversation. Around them, their old classmates are scattered in their own little groups and if they notice, none of them mentions anything about how everyone seems to avoid sitting at Felix and Sylvain’s table.

Easy conversation flows into dessert, or more specifically: Felix wordlessly giving Sylvain his peach sorbet and Sylvain beaming a rare genuine smile and promising to join him at the training grounds first thing tomorrow morning.

The sun is slowly dipping below the horizon when Sylvain and Felix gather up their dishes. On their way out of the dining hall, Ignatz stops them with a heartfelt congratulations and a bundled up package that looks suspiciously like one of his works.

“Congratulations? For what?” Artfully tousled red hair shifts as Sylvain tilts his head in confusion and reluctantly accepts the gift.

“O-oh, well Claude just said…”

Dread rises up from the pit of Felix’s stomach. “What did that schemer say this time?”

“…He said that you two were getting married.”

“What?!”

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dvp95 · 5 years ago

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quiet on widow’s peak (1)

pairing: dan howell/phil lester, pj liguori/sophie newton/chris kendall rating: teen & up tags: paranormal investigator, youtuber phil lester, dan howell is not a youtuber, online friendship, slow burn, strangers to lovers, nonbinary character, background poly, phil does some buzzfeed unsolved shit and dan is a fan word count: 3.2k (this chapter & total) summary: Phil's got a list of paranormal experiences a mile long that he likes to share with the world. Abandoned buildings, cemeteries, and ghost stories have always called his name, and a particular fan of his has a really, really good ghost story. Bingo squares: met on tumblr

new wip? NEW WIP.

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

The wind is loud in this one. That's frustrating, and it makes Phil's job a lot harder, but he can't control the weather. Be cool if he could. He does his best to level out his voice and the background noise of Mother Nature before he settles in with his good headphones and really cranks the volume.

It's even more annoying to listen to the alternating crackle and whistle right in his ears. Phil has dealt with worse during this whole process, though, so he finds the strength to power through it. He listens to the full thing three times, scribbling a few timestamps down on a Post-It pad as he does. He takes a break after that, does some stretches around his tiny bedroom and tiptoes out to get a snack without waking the whole damn house, and then he's right back in his apparently ergonomic office chair to subject his ears to more of this nonsense.

Wind, wind, and more wind. And sometimes just Phil's own voice. Nothing of note.

Phil is about to give this video up as a loss altogether when he hits one of the final timestamps and... can't figure out what that noise is.

For the first time since he opened this file, Phil grins. He exports the clip and plays around with it in Audacity. Some videos are always more fun than others, and Phil had felt like he was slogging through this one until now.

"Do you hear that, Theodore?" Phil murmurs. The tiny cactus on his desk, thankfully, does not respond.

It sounds like a person. It sounds like a person, whispering, and it definitely isn't the wind, and it isn't Phil's own voice, because he's in the middle of a question in this clip.

Phil might just be going crazy from sleep deprivation or wishful thinking, though. He pulls out his phone and texts the only group chat that doesn't cause him anxiety, which is comprised of the housemates that he actually gets along with. Anyone up? he asks, adding a single eye emoji for good measure.

Even though it's gone two in the morning, he gets immediate responses from all of them. A string of vaguely dirty emojis from Chris, a simple yeah from Sophie, and a cheerfully morbid did you know that insomnia leads to an early death? from PJ.

Wanna listen to a noise for me?

Within three minutes, Phil's bedroom is full of people in various states of sleepiness. All of them are in ridiculous pyjamas - including Phil - and PJ's hair in particular has taken on a mind of its own. Phil's room isn't really big enough for all of them, so there's some awkward shuffling before PJ claims the office chair. Phil sits at the foot of his bed with Sophie and Chris on either side of him, pressed close against each other's shoulders. It's a good thing he likes these people.

"I mean, it isn't the wind," is PJ's confident opinion. "Did you have anyone with you?"

"No, it's just me and my camera against the world," says Phil.

"No need to be a twat," Chris informs him. He taps at PJ's upper arm, impatient. "Let me have a go, then, if there's something there."

Chris is famously bad at hearing things in white noise, but PJ acquiesces the seat easily enough. Phil laughs, watching them do a weird step dance around each other in the small space between Phil's bed and desk.

"I can't hear any specific words," PJ says as he flops down across Phil's pillows, making himself comfortable. Phil just nods, because neither can he.

"How d'you know it's a person, then?" Sophie asks. Her voice is probably the only one soft enough for the hour. Their other housemates hate them for their frequent all-nighters, but Sophie is kind and quiet enough that she slips under the radar.

"You'll see for yourself."

When Sophie goes to respond, Chris interrupts in a hilariously loud voice, as if he's forgotten that having headphones on doesn't mean they can't hear him. "It's some kind of ghoulie or ghostie! I can barely fucking hear it, Philly, why didn't you mic it?"

"Why didn't I mic the ghost?" Phil asks, bewildered. Naturally, Chris doesn't hear him.

Sophie taps Chris on the shoulder and stands, leaning over his shoulder as she takes her turn listening to the sound clip over and over. Chris spins in the chair a few times and gives Phil an unhinged sort of grin.

"You got something this time," says Chris. He sounds like he's having just as much fun as Phil is, now that there's actually a thing to listen to besides his own voice and the loud, loud wind.

"I think so," says Phil. "Why didn't I mic the ghost?"

"I'm saying it would make your job a lot easier if you mic the ghost, yes."

"If I could mic a ghost, I'd be a millionaire."

"Then you better get on it, eh?" Chris laughs, spinning a bit faster. Phil has never seen the man sleep. It's a little bit worrying.

"Sure," Phil says, giving up on trying to teach any logic to someone who's clearly long lost their hold on it. "Next time I spend all night in a graveyard, I'll mic any spirits that might be hanging out."

"Shut up," Sophie tells them, mild.

Chris mimes zipping his lips, wrapping an easy arm around her waist, and PJ laughs.

For the first few months they all lived together, Phil had struggled to keep up with whatever dynamics were going on between the three of them, but he's long since given it up as something he's not going to understand.

After a moment of quiet, Sophie nods. "I hear it," she tells them. Even with the headphones on, she's quiet. "It's not words, I wouldn't put any subtitles over it."

"Yeah," PJ agrees. "Just let your audience duke it out in the comments like they always do."

"Thanks, guys," Phil says, feeling a sort of warmth sink into his shoulders. He notices that Chris is pulling up another application and half-heartedly protests. "Chris, you don't need to edit this one for me. I still haven't paid you for the last video." Or the one before that. Or the three or four previous. Phil has it written down somewhere.

"Don't be stupid," Chris hums, already clicking around erratically. It makes the editor in Phil want to scream, but he has to admit that Chris manages to find more weird visual stuff to isolate than he could on his own.

"I feel bad," says Phil, chewing his lip.

"I've told you," says Chris, "you can pay me back in chores and sexual favours."

PJ's slippered foot knocks against Phil's hip, and he grins brightly when Phil turns to him. "You know, I do have a bit of a laundry backlog."

"Funny thing, that," says Sophie.

Biting back a laugh, Phil shakes his head. "Alright, alright. Everybody leave their laundry in front of my door tomorrow."

"That's a no on the beej, then?" Chris asks, raising a single eyebrow and pointing dramatically at Phil. It has been near two years of this, and Phil is still too afraid to ask if it's a joke.

It's not as if Phil's answer would change if it wasn't a joke, because he's not interested in Chris, and he's especially not interested in becoming entangled in whatever nonsense his housemates have gotten themselves into. But, still, he might be kinder about letting Chris down if he were being genuine.

"That is a no," Phil confirms. "But I will wash your pants."

"Kinky," says Chris. He turns back to the screen and makes an incomprehensible hand gesture. "This is pretty shit. You know that, right?"

Yeah. Phil does know that. It's getting harder and harder to have the same optimism in every video that he'd had when he first started recording his wanderings around the supposedly-haunted places of Rossendale. He'd brought the camera with him when he left, but might have left that optimism behind. Phil only kind of believes in supernatural things - the way he only kind of believes in giraffes or true love - but it's been more fun than anything else to pick up a camera and try to find some evidence.

He's been doing this since he was nineteen, though, and he's getting a little bored by the formula of it all. Go into a haunted place, try to communicate with the spirits, pick up some garbled words or creepy noises, highlight visual oddities like orbs, and let the internet tear it all to shreds. Honestly, he'd have more fun making proper horror at this point in his life.

Phil shrugs and pulls his knees up to his chest. He wants to hide away from the sympathy in Sophie's eyes, from Chris' blunt words. "Yeah. I'm getting kind of... I don't know. Restless."

"Maybe you should ask people to submit things again," PJ suggests. "That went well last time."

It had, actually. Phil had needed to sort through a lot more ridiculous stories and obvious hoaxes than usual, but he'd found some nuggets of gold in all that hay. Or however that saying goes.

"People did like having their stories read out," Phil says slowly. "I'd just need to be extra sure that nobody's, like..."

"Ripping off r/NoSleep," says PJ.

"Yeah, exactly."

"We can help," Sophie says, and Phil could cry at how easily PJ and Chris agree with her.

He really doesn't deserve to have such great people around him. They've got work and lives of their own, but they're always happy to spend time crowded around Phil's computer listening to weird noises together. Phil sometimes wonders what they get out of it. Do they just like helping him, the way he has fun holding the boom for PJ's films or testing Sophie's concoctions? Or are they just as fascinated as Phil by the weirdness of it all? Do they want to see the cool instances of paranormal activity, too? At this point it feels nearly impossible to ask.

"That's going to be a lot of washing pants for me," Phil sighs. He doesn't know how to thank them, not when they always just wave it off.

"Sure is," says PJ. "But you should... ask the audience!"

"Your Chris Tarrant is pretty good," says Phil, only a little surprised by it. PJ's voice is as much of a tool to him as the rest of his body, and it's one he's always been skilled with. The impressions still tend to catch Phil off guard sometimes.

PJ tips an invisible hat. "Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week."

At his friends' not so gentle encouragement, Phil makes a few posts on his socials to ask his followers for new creepy things to explore. It might be the middle of the night in Brighton, but he has a feeling that Chris isn't leaving his desk until he's found every instance of an orb or strange shadow in the fifty minutes of currently uncut footage.

It seems like Sophie is on the same page, because she excuses herself to make tea for everyone. PJ leans over Chris' shoulder and watches the clips without sound, his lips moving as if he's murmuring to himself.

Sometimes this feels more like a group effort than Phil is comfortable with. He's never been very good at asking for help. As grateful as he is, he still itches with the need to take back control of the situation. He uses the slow trickle of fan submissions to distract him from that feeling, because all three of them do make his videos better when he stops being so possessive over his footage. Phil flops onto his back and scrolls through the incoming emails, tweets, and Tumblr messages to see if there's anything promising.

For the most part, the answer is a resounding no. Some things are blatant lies - there are countless ripoffs of films or novels that Phil happens to be familiar with, a few things swiped from creepypasta or subreddits, and his usual amount of conspiracy theorist fans insisting that some high profile person or other is a lizard - but most of it, to Phil's dismay, just doesn't grab his attention the way he wants it to.

Sophie comes back with tea and snacks. She leans her head against Phil's shoulder and watches him cycle through his apps, fact-checking idly and sighing every time something easily proves to be a hoax. Her hair smells like coconut and she makes a soft humming noise every time she lifts the mug to her lips. Her presence alone, small and warm and supportive, is enough to keep Phil from throwing his phone across the room and having a right sulk about how his career is in a tailspin because nobody makes ghosts like they used to. At some point in the night, Sophie's breathing evens out to the point that Phil thinks she's asleep, but then she reaches out to tap a tiny finger to his screen.

"What's this, then?" she murmurs.

Phil has been zoned out entirely for at least fifteen, and he blinks back into reality. There's a new message in his Tumblr inbox, one that seems like it must be over the character limit for asks. He must have submissions turned on or something, that's the only possible explanation for an actual essay being sent to him. It's barely broken into paragraphs with very little punctuation and no capitalization, and Phil has been staring at screens for far too long to try and parse this on his own.

"Can you please make sure this isn't, like, the entire Bee Movie," Phil asks, handing Sophie his phone with only a slight twinge of anxiety. He trusts her not to go snooping, but. Still. "I need to pee."

"Mhm," Sophie hums, already apparently lost in whatever stream-of-consciousness has been dropped into Phil's inbox.

The floorboards in this old Brighton house creak, and Phil has always envied some of his housemates for being able to sidestep the noises. It doesn't seem to matter how long he lives here, how much he tries to avoid making any noise, it's like the floorboards are determined to creak under Phil's weight. He winces as he passes two bedrooms whose occupants surely don't appreciate creaking outside their doors at such an ungodly hour.

At least he doesn't run into any walls this time. The nightlight in the bathroom at the end of the hall is the only thing lighting Phil's way, and he tends to stub his toes on absolutely nothing in this kind of semi-darkness.

When he makes his - very, very creaky - way back to his own room, he's bewildered by the scene that greets him. PJ and Chris have joined Sophie on his bed, and all three of them are poring over Phil's phone as though they're looking at a map to the Holy Grail.

"Hello," Phil says slowly, closing the door behind him. It creaks, too. "You aren't going through my pictures, are you?"

"No," Sophie and PJ chorus without looking up.

"You got nudes on here or something?" Chris asks with a mild sort of interest, clearly also too engaged in Phil's phone to put his all into the flirting.

"I don't," says Phil. It doesn't sound convincing, even though it's true, and he waits for Chris to tease him about it some more. When he doesn't, Phil has to admit that he's curious. "So I guess it isn't a meme or something?"

That makes them look up, in almost comedic synchronicity. Sophie blinks a few times, as if she's coming back to herself. She holds out Phil's phone and shakes her head.

"It's not a meme," she says. "And near as we can tell, it's genuine."

Phil joins them and takes his phone back, adjusting his glasses. His bed really wasn't made for four people, but his housemates have never had any personal space amongst themselves, and Phil isn't one to say no to human contact when he isn't getting it anywhere else.

The message is just as hard to read as it was at first glance, but Phil puts his brain to work. If his friends are reacting like this, it usually means he's in for something good.

hi ok so the thing is that this is completely ridiculous and i dont think its what youre looking for at all but theres a building near my uni thats got a ton of stories around it and it only started happening like this year like it isnt an old obviously haunted type of place but theres a lot of weird shit that goes down there so i found all the references to it online that i could and ive summarized them here (w/ sources ofc im not a dick) and its all just this side of strange so it seems like the sort of thing you might be interested in ok here we go SO

And it goes on like that. Phil feels his eyebrows raising as he clicks the provided links in the following walls of text, which are exactly what they're advertised as. Not a single rickroll in there. Just a handful of posts on Reddit and Facebook and independent blogs about various experiences people have had with a particular abandoned building in -

"I know this place," Phil says, surprised. He looks up at PJ's grin, Sophie's wide eyes, Chris' palms rubbing together in exaggerated interest. "I've been to parties here. Well, okay," he corrects himself before his friends can do it for him, "I've gone with Martyn to parties here and left early."

"Yeah, it isn't far out of Manchester," PJ hums. He bounces in place a bit, like he's suddenly energized enough to go jump on the soonest train up north.

"It didn't seem that weird," says Phil. "It's been a few years, I guess, but it wasn't even that scary."

"Sounds like it's only just started, though," Chris pipes up.

Phil isn't sure how much he likes that. The idea of a place he's been a few times, half an hour from his childhood home, being so suddenly full of haunted activity feels... weird. Still, it's catching his interest in a way that nothing else has in months, so.

"I'll look into it some more tomorrow," he decides, glancing at the time. His brother is probably still awake, to be honest, but Phil doesn't want to be that guy asking 'hey, do you remember the Wilkins place?' before dawn has even broken. Again. He has definitely done that sort of thing in the past. "I'll have plenty of time while I do, what, seventeen loads of laundry?"

"Something like that," PJ laughs. "Want us to clear out?"

As nice as the company and help has been, Phil still feels a rush of relief at the concept of being left alone again. He nods, still scrolling idly through the Wilkins place submission.

It hits him, very literally, too close to home to ignore. He wonders if his fan knows that, if this is somehow an elaborate prank that will end up just wasting Phil's time, but he's too curious to leave it alone. He'll just have to ask around, see if anyone else has heard these murmurings.

Til then, maybe he ought to try and get some sleep. Phil's computer, still open on the editing software, tempts him.

Well. What's another couple hours at this point?

#phanfic #phanfiction #dnp fic #words words words #qowp..... mayhaps i made a mistake w this title......#quiet on widow's peak #YES it's another marianas title what are you the marianas title police?#bingo

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mldrgrl · 6 years ago

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What it Feels Like For a Girl

by: mldrgrl Rating: NC-17 Summary: I had several Anons, and one non-Anon, requesting a body swapping story where instead of Morris Fletcher and Mulder swapping bodies in Dreamland, it’s Mulder and Scully. So, here’s the result. Mulder and Scully swap bodies at a very inopportune time. (Or very opportune, depending on how you look at it). Note: I’m going to be honest here and say, I don’t think this is a concept that works well on paper. A visual medium serves this thing a lot better. Oh, well. A big thank you to @kateyes224 for being the first to get through it :D

As the blinding light in the sky hovers closer, Mulder takes hold of my wrist and squeezes. I can’t see past the light, now shining directly into my eyes so strongly that I have to put my hand in front of my face because squinting doesn’t cut it.

There’s a flash and a moment of equally blinding darkness where it takes a moment for my sight to recover itself. Morris Fletcher still stands grimly before us, flanked by military personnel who look a little too trigger happy for my taste.

“Come on, Mulder,” I say, but the strange thing is, I don’t hear my voice, I hear his. When I look to my right, he’s not there. When I look down, he’s still gripping my wrist, except I feel like I’m the one doing the holding. And then I’m looking into my own startled eyes.

“What the fu-?” she says, right about the time I’m blurting out “oh my God.”

“Mulder?” I whisper.

“Scully?”

We’re both interrupted by an impatient Fletcher, barking at us that we are trespassing on government property. She...he looks annoyed, clearly about to make an ill-advised retort and I shake my head at him.

“Come on,” I say, tugging on the sleeve of my own jacket. “Let’s just go.”

There’s an awkward moment of confusion as we move to the car, heading to our usual sides. Mulder stumbles over his feet and then tip-toes towards the driver’s door with miniscule, shuffling steps.

“What the hell are you doing?” I hiss at him.

“I can’t walk in these shoes!” he hisses back.

I don’t fit into the passenger side. I’ve never not fit into any space ever. But, here I am, knees folded up and knocking into the glove compartment. He’s not faring much better, unable to reach the pedals and clearly distressed about it.

“Maybe we should switch?” I suggest.

“Not until we get out of here and find out what the hell is going on. How do you...Jesus, I can’t reach anything!”

This is surreal. Whatever’s happening feels like a nightmare or a bad acid trip. I keep pinching the skin on my wrist trying to snap out of whatever this is, but it’s not working. Out of curiosity, I reach up and touch my face, feel my fingers scrape across the five o’clock shadow dusting my cheeks. This can’t be happening. This can’t possibly be happening.

*****

We don’t talk much on the way to our motel. I can’t speak for Mulder...well, actually, I am speaking for Mulder, currently, but I think it’s just too damn weird to try to talk to each other and hear someone else speaking. It’s jarring. We do agree on one thing though, and that’s the fact that we need to get back to DC as soon as possible.

Actually, we agree on two things. We get back to DC as soon a possible, and we don’t tell anyone about this until we know for sure what’s going on. To that end, I book a red eye out of Santa Fe and Mulder hastily packs up our motel rooms.

“Don’t you have any flats?” he whines, digging through my duffel bag.

“At home.”

“I feel like I’m going to break an ankle.” He takes tentative steps across the motel room, trips twice, and nearly takes a header into the wall, but I happen to catch him.

“You hurt me, I’ll kill you.”

He stands there wobbling like a baby giraffe. I’m afraid if I laugh at him he’ll think I’m enjoying this situation. Trust me, I’m not. Of all the messes he’s gotten us into, this one surely takes the cake. So, I just stand there, with my arms crossed, watching Mulder hobble back and forth until he can assure us both he isn’t going to fall on his ass in a pair of two-inch heels.

The flight home is the most uncomfortable flight I have ever been on. I prefer a window seat when I fly normally, but my whole body feels too long to fit anywhere but the aisle. Mulder, on the other hand, looks almost pleased with himself and leans back in the seat and stretches.

“This is great,” he says. “I’ve never had so much room before.”

As soon as I get my own body back, I’m going to kill him. Slowly. Using lots of torture.

Maybe it’s crankiness from the unbearable cross-country journey, or the awkwardness of being in someone else’s body, but as soon as the flight lands, I have the compulsory need to be as far away from him as possible. It’s so hard to look at him and see myself, but to know it isn’t me.

“I think we need to stick together,” he says to me as we head to the taxi line. “Just stay by each other’s sides until we come up with a way of fixing this.”

There’s a moment where he starts to put his hand on the small of my back out of habit, but his usual aim is thrown off by our change in height and instead lands directly on my ass. I jump.

“Mulder!”

“Wha-oh! Sorry.”

“Be careful.”

“I said I was sorry.”

“Well how would you like it if I smacked your a...nevermind. Have you come up with any solutions?”

“No. You?”

“None. I do think we need to behave as normal though. Go about our days like nothing unusual has happened.”

“Days?”

“We don’t know how long this is going to last, Mulder. Hours, days, weeks-”

“Don’t say months.”

“Years.”

“Years,” he barks.

“Keep your voice down,” I whisper, bending so our heads are closer together. I don’t think I’ve ever had to bend down to speak to anyone in my life. Why do I have to be so short and why does he have to be so tall? It’s a wonder neither of us has suffered a neck sprain in the past six years.

“How can you be so calm about this?”

“I am far from calm, but I’m not going to freak out in a taxi line.”

“Well, then what do you want to do?”

“It’s Saturday. We go home. We think on it. We come in on Monday, go over our ideas, and hopefully, one of us will have thought of something brilliant.”

“You want to split up?”

“I want to think. Which means, I don’t want to be distracted and I don’t want to get dragged into any other of your crazy schemes until I’ve had the chance to process this.” There’s a taxi approaching and we’re next in line, so I do the gentlemanly thing and open the door for Mulder. He reluctantly slides into the back seat and I hand over my duffel bag to him.

“Oh, and Mulder,” I say, just before I close to door. “Do not, under any circumstances, get me into any trouble. Just remember, I already shot you once.”

“Scully, I really think-”

I slam the door to cut him off. I just want to get home and come up with a solution.

*****

I am well and truly exhausted by the time I get to Mulder’s apartment, my home sweet home for the next...however long it takes to fix this mess. I want nothing more than to lay down, take a nap, and hope I’ve dreamed up something truly amazing by the time I wake up. What I didn’t count on was the fact that Mulder really and truly didn’t have a bed.

All these years, I really thought he’d been joking when he said he never got around to buying a bed since he preferred his couch anyway. He referred to his bedroom as the storage closet, and though I have glanced into it a time or two, all I saw were boxes. Surely there must be a bed hidden under there somewhere, so I thought. Well, I was wrong.

I almost called Mulder to berate him right then and there, first for getting us into this mess, second for not living like a proper adult, but what would that really solve? I’d still be without a bed for the foreseeable future. So, I did what a normal human being would do and I looked up the nearest mattress store in the Yellow Pages and drove down. I probably spent an hour trying them all out, found one I liked, and with the swipe of Mulder’s credit card conveniently located in the wallet in my back pocket, bought him a mattress and bedframe that would be delivered bright and early tomorrow morning. One night on the couch probably wouldn’t kill me.

With that done, I went to the mall and bought some sheets and pillows for the new bed and then on to the grocery store for food. I’ve seen the science experiments growing in Mulder’s fridge and, though I’m pro-science experiment, I’m anti-eating them. It also occured to me, once I got back and fixed myself a nice salad, I had better clear out all that junk in the storage closet so the bed would have a place to go.

In the midst of packing boxes and cleaning, I used the time to think. I don’t know though, something about being in Mulder’s body must have affected my brain, because the only ideas I could come up with were ones that he would’ve thrown at me. We could see a psychic. We could hold a seance. We could try time travel.

By the time I’m finished turning the bedroom into an actual bedroom, it’s past dinner time, and I do the most Mulder thing I can do. I order a pizza and sprawl out on the couch in front of a movie.

At this point, you’re probably wondering why I’m boring you with all this stupid, mundane crap when you must be thinking oh my God, you’re in an entirely different body, why haven’t you inspected it from head to toe and tried out all the...new body features. Well, look, I am curious beyond belief about what it’s really like to be a man, but I’m going to have to look Mulder in the eye again and I don’t know if I can satisfy a curiosity and still maintain a professional relationship after that. There are boundaries.

But, fine, I may have changed into a nice pair of jeans and a sweater within the full length view of a mirror, not that I was looking, but I think the few glimpses I caught will allow me to keep my integrity intact. I mean, and I did have to shower, so that was interesting. I didn’t attempt to shave, but I will compliment Mulder on the body wash he uses. It was very nice and I might try to find some with a more feminine smell when things are back to normal.

The only real challenge I run into is how to use the bathroom. It’s one thing to check out Mulder’s body, but another thing to touch certain parts that need to be touched, I assume, when one uses the bathroom. I mean, I didn’t know what would happen. Do I just stay still and hope it aims itself, or what if once I start it’s like an out of control fire hose situation? I know it’s not very manly, but I opt to sit down to pee. Mulder doesn’t have to know.

*****

It’s late I think, at least past 10pm, and I’m dozing on the couch when my cell phone rings. “Scully,” I mumble out of habit. “Um, I mean Mul-”

“Scully, it’s me.” There’s an edge to his (my?) voice that doesn’t sound good.

“Mulder?”

“You don’t...you don’t happen to feel like you’re dying, do you?”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh God,” he moans. “Scully...something’s wrong.”

“Mulder?”

“Something is really, really wrong.”

“Mulder, I’ll be right there. Don’t move.”

I’m off the couch in an instant, thankful for my suddenly longer legs that get me out of the apartment and down the block to Mulder’s car in what feels like two minutes flat. I’m also grateful that I gave him a key a few years back and I use it to enter my apartment about fifteen minutes later. All the lights are off. I call out to him and he answers from the bedroom.

I find him curled up on the bed, still wearing the same pantsuit I threw on before accompanying him on that wild goose chase to New Mexico. There’s just enough light filtering in from the street lamps outside to highlight the anguish on his face. Let me tell you, it’s a little disconcerting to see yourself in pain. I crawl onto the bed and put my hand on his forehead, but he’s cool as a cucumber.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“You don’t feel it?” he answers, lifting his eyes up to me.

“Feel what, Mulder?”

He bursts into tears and rolls away from me. “Why didn’t you tell me!”

“Tell you what?”

“I thought it must be an effect of whatever this thing is that’s going on, but if it’s just me and it’s not you, then it can’t be and it hurts so much. Scully, why didn’t you tell me the cancer was back?”

“What?” If I wasn’t panicked before, I certainly am now. “What the hell are you talking about, Mulder?”

“Your body is dying, I can feel it. I’m dying.”

“What hurts?”

“Everything! Everything, God, my head is...and there’s this pain in my back - I think it’s the kidneys. Scully, I think your kidneys are going to explode. And then the light was too bright and I feel sick and then like right here…” He presses a hand to his hip, a little lower and off center from his abdomen. “It’s like...I don’t even know. Something is happening right there, something bad.”

It dawns on my almost immediately and I do some quick math and think about the date. If it wasn’t so tragic, I’d laugh.

“Mulder, you’re not dying.”

“Do you think it’s appendicitis?”

“It’s not appendicitis either. You’re PMSing.”

“I’m what?”

“You’ll be starting your period tomorrow.”

There’s a monumental silence that follows as he stares at me, silent tears trickling down his cheeks. And then he gasps loudly and starts weeping.

“Why am I crying!” he chokes out.

“Hormones.”

“What am I going to do?”

I try not to roll my eyes. “You’re going to do what every woman since the dawn of time has done, you’re just going to deal with it.”

“But, I have no idea what to do with...the things and the...you know…”

Yes, I do know. And a few moments ago I’ll admit I was feeling a little smug about Mulder having to getting to experience what it’s really like to be a woman, but he’s got to experience that in my body, which means…hoo boy. And of course he’s not going to know how to handle the finer details of a menstrual cycle, which means it’s going to be up to me to show him. What other alternative is there?

I’m never going to New Mexico with him again. In fact, I’m never going anywhere with him again. This is all his fault. If not for his stupid, wild goose chase, Mulder wouldn’t have cramps and I wouldn’t be on the verge of showing him how to use a tampon. Jesus, but there’s another even more embarrassing conversation we’re going to have to have in a minute and it’s going to make the rest of it seem like a picnic.

“Alright, Mulder, I have medication I’m going to get for you,” I tell him. “I’ll be right back.”

“Okay.” He wipes his eyes with the backs of his hands and I slip off the bed.

I grab the prescription bottle from the medicine cabinet and fill the water glass on my sink. I consider for a moment just leaving it as this - giving him the pills and walking away - but, I can see him behind me in the mirror, doubled up on the bed, probably praying for swift and sweet relief and I know all too well what it’s like and how it feels to just want someone, anyone to come take care of me when it’s as bad as this. So, I have to bite the bullet and get him through this the best that I can because in a way, I’m doing this for myself.

“Take these,” I say, handing him two pills and the glass of water when I return to the bedroom. He sits up, just enough to swallow them down and grimaces as he tries to lay down again onto his back. I put the bill bottle and the glass on the nightstand and stare at the top drawer for a few moments before I sit beside him.

“Thank you,” he whispers, shutting his eyes. That’s good. It might be easier to talk to him if he’s not looking at me.

“Mulder…”

He sort of grunts-slash-whimpers in response. I reach over to gently untuck his shirt from his slacks. “Why haven’t you changed?” I ask. “I’ve-you’ve been in this suit for two days.”

“I didn’t feel right about it.”

I unbutton the top button on the slacks and rest my hand low on the bare skin of his abdomen. I press down, slowly increasing the pressure.

“Oh,” he breathes with a sigh. “Your hand is warm. Oh, that’s nice.”

“I know.”

He puts his hand on my wrist like he’s afraid I’ll move away.

“You need to get undressed,” I whisper to him, making a gentle circular motion with my hand. “You need to get more comfortable.”

He doesn’t move, although he gives a tiny shake of his head and his brow furrows slightly. He grips my wrist a little harder. “I’m good here.”

“Come on,” I tease. “Nothing I haven’t seen before.”

“It isn’t right.”

“You have my permission, Mulder, if that’s what you need so we can deal with this.”

It’s an interesting thing to watch Mulder’s expressions of struggle play out on my face. I can see him even if I’m looking into my own eyes. It’s bizarre. But, then again, I’ve always said I could read his face as easily as I read my own. I just never imagined for it to be so literal.

“How about this?” I say. “You’re the only one that can take care of my body right now and I need you to do what I ask of you because you’ll get sick if you don’t. I trust you.”

That seems to do the trick. He nods a little, but still clutches my wrist.

“I was wrong when I said we should go about our days like everything is fine. You were right, we need to stick together on this, so I’m not going anywhere. I’ll get you through this, I promise.”

“Okay.”

“What’s going to happen right now is, I’m going to go into the other room. You’re going to get undressed. You’re going to open the top drawer of my nightstand and you’re going to take out the blue velvet drawstring bag.” I pause. “Um, I’m sure you’ll figure it out from there. And when you’re doing, take a nice hot bath and go to bed. As for tomorrow...we’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”

“Wait, wait, wait!” Mulder stutters, taking a vice-grip on my arm. “Are you asking...no. No, no, no.”

“It’s okay. You just need to do this and...it helps. I promise.”

“No way. For one thing I’m not...and for another it’s...no, Scully, I can’t.”

“Listen, the medication alone isn’t going to solve everything. I’ve learned over the course of dealing with this for the last 20 years, so you’re going to have to true me.”

“I do trust you, Scully, but I’m not...I’m not you.”

“You do know how to bring a woman to or-”

“Yes! Yes, but that’s different. And it’s...it’s what you said before, this is your body.”

“Which you’re currently occupying. If you think I’m not dying a little of mortification right now that I have to explain all of this to you right now, you’d be wrong. But, I’m telling you, from personal experience, that an orgasm increases the blood flow to the uterus and contracts the muscles, which will ease the cramps you’re having now. It also releases dopamine and endorphins, which are going to make the migraine you’ve got building up to go away and will let you sleep. So, there’s a really nice, really expensive, very trustworthy vibrator in that drawer and if you just...tonight is going to be a lot easier for you to handle if you do what I tell you to.”

“No.”

“Mulder!” God, but his stubbornness is exasperating.

“You do it.”

“I can’t do it. You’re me and I’m you.”

“Exactly.”

“Exactly, so-”

“You know what to do. You do the thing with the...thing. That way you’re the one taking care of things.”

Oh my God. “Well, that’s not really…”

“See. You can’t tell me it’s okay for me, but not for you, if your argument is you’re me and I’m you.”

“I mean, that is the argument, but then if I’m involved, it would really be you that’s involved because I’m you and you’re me.”

“That doesn’t make any sense, it’s the exact same argument for why you should versus why you shouldn’t.”

“Well, I’m sorry, this is the first time I’ve been in someone else’s body and I don’t really know what’s okay and what isn’t!”

“Scully, I can definitely tell you it’s not okay to ask me to masterbate in your stead because I don’t even think it would technically count as masturbation since I’m not you. So, if you want this body to get off, you’re going to have to be the one to get it off because it’s your body, not mine.”

I realize this argument has gotten a little out of hand and though we’re not quite shouting, it’s louder than it probably should be. I take it back down to a decent level. “Alright,” I say. “I see your point.”

“Good. So, I’ll go ahead and take that hot bath if you get a swimsuit for me and as for-”

“I mean, alright, Mulder.” I know this is insane, but I really do see his point. I also know that if he’s up all night in pain, if he doesn’t get any sleep, if he can’t shake that headache or the cramps, it’s only going to get worse from here. He’s leaving me no choice.

“You mean...wait, I don’t know if…”

“We both agree. It’s my body, isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” First thing’s first, we need to get him undressed. Maybe what I need to do is stop thinking about him as Mulder, but as me. We need to get me undressed. “Sit up,” I say.

He does as I ask with quite a bit of hesitation and doesn’t look at me. But then, he lifts his eyes and I sit back as the air leaves my lungs. He’s reclined slightly, hands pressed back behind his hips, a little flushed, hair mussed, smudges of mascara under his eyes, and I have this moment of complete awe. He looks...I look beautiful. It tightens my chest and sends a flutter to my gut.

“What do you want me to do?” he asks.

Christ, Mulder, I think. I want you to stop looking at me like that. There’s fear there, but also trust, and expectation, like I have all the answers to all the questions in the world. It’s making me feel flustered and incompetent. Is this why Mulder always stutters when we argue?

“You’re so beautiful,” I whisper, and I feel the heat rise to my cheeks in embarrassment.

“You are, you know. I mean, you say that like you have no idea.”

“Okay, maybe this really wasn’t-”

“Scully.” He puts his hand on my cheek and it feels soft and delicate, but it feels like Mulder.

“Take your shirt off.”

His hand slides away slowly and then he pulls at his shirt from the back of the neck, typical man. I stop him before he can stretch it out and break any threads in the collar. I happen to really like that shirt. I take it up from the bottom and he lifts his arms to help draw it off. He blinks a few times. I have to lean into him to reach around and unhook his bra. Surprisingly, I fumble slightly, unaccustomed to the length of my own fingers.

“You smell like me,” he says, and I can feel his breath against my neck. It raises the hairs on my arms and stirs my groin. Oh God.

“I had a shower,” I answer, pulling back.

“Oh yeah? How did that go?”

“Nothing to say about it.”

“Did you look?”

“Look at what?”

“It’s okay if you did.”

“Mulder, I’m a doctor.”

“Hm.” He studies my face for a moment and then lays back and closes his eyes.

I lay down as well, on my side, propped up on an elbow, and put my hand on his chest, palm between his breasts and fingers splayed. My chest, I remember. My breasts. I start with a soft caress, knowing how sensitive and achy my chest would be right now.

“I should tell you,” he says, cracking one eye open a little and shifting his gaze down to my waist. “Sometimes...he’s got a mind of his own. I don’t know if anything will happen, but right now my hand is on a beautiful woman’s breast, so you might want to start thinking of Santa Claus.”

“Santa Claus?”

“I don’t know why, but it helps.

“Okay, thanks for the warning.”

He closes his eyes again and takes a deep breath. My hand rises and falls with his chest and I pick up where I left off, this time slowly sliding the back of my hand around the curve of his right breast. His mouth opens a little and he takes another deep breath. I take my thumb and circle over and around the nipple, gentle enough so that it’s hardly a touch at all. He bites into his bottom lip and scratches at the bedclothes.

It feels like there’s electricity in the room, humming between our bodies. I’ll blame it on the charge and say that it’s what compels me to lean over and kiss his neck. I know the spot to hit, just below the ear and at the edge of the hairline. For whatever reason, it’s always made me light up like a Christmas tree. He whimpers, and one knee bends up ever so slightly and then slides back down, but his brow furrows like he’s in pain.

“Mulder?”

“Yeah?” he squeaks, and then clears his throat. “Yes?”

“Are you okay?”

It takes a few seconds to answer and he shifts his hips. “Um, I think so.”

“Open your eyes for me.”

He blinks rapidly and then holds his eyes open to mine. They’re wide and dark, but when I sweep the back of my hand down along his side, they droop almost sleepily. It’s encouraging and I move on, bending my neck to place my lips against the top swell of his breast, with gentle suction, just how I like it. His knee slides up again, higher this time, and bumps the side of my hip. Without thinking, I catch his leg, hand wrapped around the inner thigh, and hold it there, slightly open, as I work my mouth down and across his chest.

He breathes my name and his fingers suddenly slide into my hair, first one hand and then the other. Damn, but it feels good. I’ve always loved the soothing act of having my hair washed at a salon, but it’s incomparable to having nails scratching at your scalp and thumbs skimming your nape. It’s like I can feel it in the roots of my hair down to my toes.

Before I know it, I’m looming over him like it’s a natural move to make. I know at this stage when I’m with a man, I’d be pulling him into that perfect cradle between my thighs where they fit so nicely, but the compulsion for me right now is to slide into that space myself. As I sink down, I’m conscious of what the weight of a man is like, pressing you down, making you feel more delicate than you are at times. And I’m conscious of just how much larger I feel. The body under mine, my body, feels vulnerable, and I have the urge to protect it, to treat it carefully, and by extension, to protect Mulder, treat him carefully as well.

“Is this alright?” I ask.

“Mmhm,” he says, shifting beneath me. His bent legs are pressed to my hips and his hands move to my shoulders and then I begin to waver.

I’ll be completely honest here, I have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t engage in any foreplay when I’m by myself, mostly because I don’t need to, but even if I know the ins and outs of my body, I don’t know what it feels like for Mulder right now. I know what I’m feeling like in his body, and all the images of a fat, bearded man in a red suit that I’m trying to conjure up are no match for what’s happening to me.

It’s insane, I know, but this has got to be the single most erotic thing that’s ever happened in my life. And I also I know that the brain is a powerful organ, but it’s a mind-bending concept to be able to touch yourself with someone else’s hands and not recognize your own body. As it happened, I had to wonder, has my breast always felt this soft and heavy, or is that just how it feels in Mulder’s hand? Has my abdomen always felt so smooth? Has my hip always curved so invitingly?

And I’ll be damned if the ache of arousal is any different now than when I’m in my own body. The pressure is the same, if not a little lower in the pelvis. The heavy, swollen feeling between my legs is the same, but with a different consequence. And yet, I’m still overwhelmed with the urge to grind my hips into the bed, just as I would if I was myself.

I make a move to back up just a little lower, and oh my god, the friction and the pressure is both delicious and unbearable. I reflexively groan a little and Mulder opens his eyes.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

“Fine,” I breathe, recognizing the hoarseness in my voice as the same one I’d encountered on occasion from knocking on our connecting motel doors and being told ‘just a minute.’

I move up and off of Mulder to sit back on my heels. His eyes travel down to my lap and back up again when I unzip his pants. The pressure against my jeans is tipping past the border of pleasurable to painful. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house…

I grit my teeth, wiggling his pants off his hips and drawing them down his legs. I notice with a little bit of relief that even if he couldn’t manage to get undressed, he did at least remove my socks and shoes. All that he’s wearing now is navy blue panties, not the sexiest pair I own, but it could be worse.

Faced with this moment though, this turning point, I have to pause. He’s aroused, I can see it and I can smell it. I’m aroused, which is becoming more and more painfully obvious with each passing second. So, what do we do about it? Should we keep running from what I’m fairly certain we’ve both wanted for quite some time, or do we give in and experience something no one else on this planet has likely experienced before? Jump or turn back?

“Mulder, I...I asked you to take care of my body for me and I never...I should’ve asked if you want me to do the same.”

“You looked, didn’t you?”

“Of course I looked.”

“Did you like what you saw?”

“I want this. I want this if you want this, but I need your help.”

“You need a hand?” He smirks and reaches for the fly of my jeans.

“I want you to show me what you like and I want you to tell me how it feels for you.”

“Well, the first part’s easy. I like everything.” He sits up and pushes my open jeans off my hips, a little rougher than I would have, and takes the boxers down with it. Without any hesitance, he wraps a hand around my shaft, making a tight fist, and tugs up once, leading with the thumb to circle the head lightly.

“Holy mother of fuck,” I groan. His grip remains firm and his rhythm is steady. He twists his wrist just a little with every upwards jerk of his hand. It’s not the slow climb towards ecstasy I’m used to. There’s an immediate gratification that comes with it, but also no satisfaction. I want more, but it’s also too much. “Sss...stop…” I pant.

He releases me and I swear all the air leaves my lungs with a whoosh. I already want the feeling back. Instead, I lean over and kiss him. It’s not what I expect it to be and I’ll admit, I’m a little letdown, but I suppose that’s only because I’ve fantasized about being able to run my tongue over that pouty lower lip of his. We both pull away with as though the disappointment is mutual.

I’m overwhelmed by a feeling of bashfulness and as I look down and sit back, suddenly remember that I’m still fully clothed. Nervously, I take off my shirt and then I have to lay down to kick my shoes and pants off. And then I just lie there, fully naked, staring at the shadows on the ceiling.

“Hey,” Mulder says, laying down beside me putting his chin on my shoulder. “We don’t have to do this.”

“I know we don’t. I want to though, it’s just…”

He takes my hand, twines our fingers together and then brings them to his chest. I can feel the swift thump of his heart which matches the beat of my own, quick and strong. I roll towards him so we’re face to face, nose to nose. He leans his forehead against mine.

“I wouldn’t do this with anyone but you,” I say.

“Me either.” He let’s go of my hand and reaches down to slide the panties off. “Is it weird that I keep thinking how much I want you inside me right now?”

I shake my head. “Not unless it’s weird that I keep thinking about how much I want to be inside you.”

“I want to know what it’s like to feel what you feel.”

“I do too.”

“How do you want to do this?”

“How about just like this?”

“Okay.”

But, neither of us really know how to start. We make some abbreviated movements towards bringing our bodies together, but fall short. Finally, I take his leg and pull it over my hip. I don’t know if I want to watch his face for this moment, or if I want to watch us. Ultimately, I settle on us and leave it up to Mulder to guide me inside.

We don’t magically come together like I’d imagined. There’s fumbling and just as I feel myself start to ease into his warm, wet folds, he let’s go and I slip away. He grips my shoulders, breathing hard, and I reach up to push away the hair that’s fallen in front of his face.

“You okay?” I ask.

“It’s different. Stings a little. I don’t want...I don’t want to hurt you somehow.”

“It’s just for a moment, I promise. You won’t hurt me. But, if it’s too much, or too soon, we can slow down.”

“What if I’m not ready? How would I know?”

At first I think he means emotionally, but it’s the follow up question that changes things. And since he has no first-hand experience, that’s true, how would he know? I reach down between his legs and dip my middle finger inside. He tenses and I can feel the resistance of his body.

“Relax,” I whisper to him.

“I’m trying.”

I understand his nervousness. I think back over my first few times during sex, when it felt like an invasion of my body, no matter how much I wanted it. I adjust my hand, pull my finger out slowly just a little, and then slide back in, curling it as I do. I must admit, having longer fingers makes hitting my target a lot easier. His mouth drops open with a sharp gasp and his hips push forward into mine.

“Good?” I ask.

“Uh huh.”

I do a bit of lazy exploration with my thumb, skimming indirectly over the sensitive little bud that’s going to ultimately make Mulder’s toes curl, before I bring it out of hiding. He moans and pulls my hip closer with his thigh.

“You have to tell me,” I say.

“It’s so fleeting. I don’t know.”

I slow down and make exaggerated circles with my thumb, increasing the pressure and tightness of the motion little by little. I know when I’ve got it just right when his hips roll forward, but then he jerks back and my hand slips free.

“Oh, that was…” his breath hitches.

“It’s okay. Move with it, not away from it.”

We start over from the beginning, but quickly find our way back to before. My hand cramps a lot quicker than usual, but quitting isn’t an option. Fortunately, he’s learned quickly how to match the rhythm of my hand with his hips. There’s just one more thing I think he needs for me to get him there.

“I want you to try to squeeze my finger,” I say.

“What?” he breathes.

“Think about those muscles down there, and try to squeeze.”

His inner thighs tighten against my hand.

“Not the legs. Inside. You can do it, you just have to concentrate on it.”

A determined look comes over his face and I slow just enough to make him want it that much more. “Oh, don’t stop,” he says, just as I feel the slightest bit of pressure against my finger.

“I’m not.”

“Don’t stop, don’t stop. Oh, Scully, that’s...oh…”

He tenses and rocks forward. His nails dig into my shoulder and it sends a jolt of desire straight down my own body. The heavy ache I felt earlier is becoming tight and painful again. I slip my hand out of Mulder and wrap it around my shaft, just as he’d done earlier. There is a need in my gut like being thirsty with a glass of water just out of reach.

“I need you,” I murmur. “Mulder, please.”

“I need you too.”

With less fumbling this time around, I manage to push guide myself inside. And oh my god, to be enveloped by the heat and the wetness and the tight grip of his body is just...oh my god. But, Mulder is whimpering, making a short little gasps in the back of his throat and I stop halfway in and hold onto him.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“Nothing,” he breathes. “Nothing, this is just...it feels so...it’s so different.”

“You feel amazing.”

“More. I want more.”

“Are you sure?”

“All of it. I want to feel all of you. Please.”

I push deeper, until our hips meet, and then I stop and relish the moment. Our bellies press together, our thighs are twined, our chests expand together with every breath and I actually don’t know where I start and end any longer. When I move, he moves. When I put my arm around him, he puts his arm around me.

The pleasure sensation is different, more acute, more like tingling pressure. It drives my hips forward. The rapid beat of my heart matches the quick pulse between my legs. Blood rushes through my veins, heats my chest, swells in my groin. I have the urge to move faster, but this position has me restrained.

I stop, only long enough to roll Mulder onto his back and press up on my knees. The new position forces Mulder’s legs wide apart and I take his right leg and drape it over my shoulder. He grips my ass impatiently and I slam my hips back into his, grinding down a little with my public bone this time.

“Oh my god,” he cries out. At least, that’s what I think he says. It’s one long exhale and a groan, but that’s what it sounds like.

I have to agree though. Oh my god. Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod. Everything below my pelvis starts to tighten. This must be it. I can feel the release is imminent. And Mulder’s got that pinched-brow expression of deep concentration again. I can feel him. I can feel him pulling me deeper, squeezing me tighter, and my eyes start to roll back in my head.

“Oh god, oh god.” I’m not sure who yells it, but I know I feel like a bottle of champagne that’s just been uncorked. All the pressure that’s been rising up explodes into stars behind my eyes. The force of it is so strong that I can’t breathe. I can only groan and quiver. Beneath me, Mulder is also moaning softly. The heel of his left foot digs softly into my ass.

I’m on the verge of collapse and muster up enough strength to pull his leg from my shoulder and turn onto my side. I want to weep when I feel our bodies disconnect. I reach for him just as he reaches for me and we twine together again, a lot stickier and sweatier than before.

“Wow,” he says.

“Yeah.”

“I can’t move.”

“Me neither.”

“You were right about the orgasm thing though. It’s like the cramps never happened.”

I chuckle a little. “That’s good.”

“And, like, Scully...twice? In a row? It’s not even like a wham, bam, thank you, ma’am kind of way either, those are just...wow.”

“It’s not always like that.”

“Really?”

“No.”

“Huh.” He stares up at the ceiling and considers this. “Does that mean I should be flattered, or should you?”

I laugh and shrug a little. Mulder presses his cheek to my arm and sighs. Laying here like this doesn’t feel that strange at all.

“Do I still need that hot bath?” he asks.

“You should. Even if it’s just to clean up.”

“You want to join me?”

“Yeah. Sure. I might need a minute.”

“Should’ve warned you. Sex makes me sleepy.”

“Not me.” I yawn.

“I’ll go get the bath ready.”

“Okay.”

“Scully, about tomorrow.”

“Heating pad, Advil, and you’ll get to learn how to use a tampon. Wait, there was a short in the wire of my heating pad. I had to throw it out. We’ll think of something.”

“Yes, I can’t wait, it’s going to be great.”

I chuckle again, this time with my face pressed to the mattress and my eyes closed.

“But,” he says. “What I mean is, what happens tomorrow? Where do we go from here?”

“First we figure out how to get things back to normal. And then...and then we’ll see.”

“Okay, I’ll go run the bath.”

“Okay.”

*****

I wake up with the sun on my cheek, a soreness in my thighs, and a twinge in my abdomen. I pick my head up and turn it to the other side. The bed is empty.

“Mulder?” I sit up and look at my hands. My hands. I’m wearing a pair of flannel pajamas I don’t remember putting on.

I get out of bed and walk through my empty apartment. Something feels off. I feel like I’m in a dream or I’ve just woken from one. And where is Mulder? But, wait, why would Mulder be here?

I return to the bedroom and stare at my bed. I can feel flashes of my dream or a memory bubbling up to the forefront of my mind, but they’re also not quite clear. I’m making love with Mulder, but my body isn’t my own. I am Mulder. My cheeks flush. How strange.

My thighs though. They’re sore and ache in only the way my thighs will ache after a night of passion. Why would I wake up with Mulder’s name on my lips? I pick up the pillow next to mine. It smells like him. It smells like us.

I find my cell phone in my duffle bag by the front door. I remember packing a bag to go to New Mexico with Mulder, but almost nothing after that. I call his cell, pacing in front of my table as it rings.

“Mulder,” he answers.

“Mulder, it’s me.”

“Hey, Scully.”

“Mulder, were you…?”

“Was I what?”

How do I ask him if he was here last night? How do I ask him if this blurry image of the two of us in my head is real? And if it is, well why did he leave? It can’t be real. I’m just being ridiculous.

“Nevermind,” I say. “I think I had a weird dream or something.”

“Hang on, Scully, someone’s at the door.” I hear him open his door on the other end of the phone and a distant conversation. “A bed? I didn’t order a bed.”

I gasp and hang up. I ordered the bed. I remember. Oh my god.

*****

An hour later, Mulder shows up at my door and I open it, but I don’t move back to let him in. He sighs and leans his head against the jamb and then holds a gift bag out to me.

“What’s this?” I ask.

“It’s a heating pad.”

“Why did you leave?”

“Can I come in?”

I back up and let him through. He’s wearing what I wore yesterday, what he must have picked up off my bedroom floor this morning before he walked out.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

“I want to know why you left.”

He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair. “When I woke up this morning, I was a little disoriented. I didn’t know where I was or what happened. I thought at first that I might have been drugged - that we may have been drugged.”

“And then?”

“And then things started coming back to me in pieces. It was like deja vu at first, but then I remembered the lights in the sky and you being me and...the rest of it. And I remembered you telling me that you didn’t know what would happen after things were back to normal, and I was afraid that you would wake up and be embarrassed or regret what...or that you would shut me out and we’d never acknowledge it or speak of it again.”

“I’m sorry you felt that way.”

“I don’t remember everything. There’s parts that are clear and parts that aren’t. I do know that, for me, it was pretty incredible.”

“It was for me too.”

“Well, yeah.” He grins. “The only time I crash hard like that is when the sex is really good. I mean, like really really good. So…”

I feel my cheeks get hot and I look down at the gift bag in my hands. Some men bring women flowers. Mulder brings me a heating pad.

“You bought me a bed, huh?” he says.

I huff at my feet and nod slightly. He shuffles closer, takes the bag out of my hands and puts it on the table. I pluck at the blanket hanging off the back of the couch.

“Guess I was past due,” he says. “There is one thing I think we need to settle though.”

“What’s that?”

He cups my face and leans down. This time, I get to taste that bottom lip of his that I’ve always wanted. It’s even better than I dreamed.

The End

#xf fanfic #msr #i wrote this #humor #dreamland #there be sex here

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rilldineth · 5 years ago

Text

So a friend of mine told me that given that we are now in 2020, it will be fun if I did a top 20 ships of the past decade for me and boy, did I thought was a good idea and I have decided, why not right? I will be listing them here and...if followers decide to read it...well...

You will quickly notice that probably that most, if not all the ships fall on the following categories: a) rare-ships that are obv not canon; b) ships that are obviously crack; c) ships that had wasted potential, the ones hinted but never happened or briefly happened in canon and writers decided to fuck up. There’s also only one...one RL ship and I am ashamed yet not, but had to list it because I spent a long time hung up on it so don’t judge me.

So yes list...

Before the list, no list is complete without some honorable mentions, these are mostly ships I either got into the hype to recently (not being dedicated for years as the one I will list) or had my fancy then lost it.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Charlastor from Hazbin Hotel (recently got into it)

Clack from Final Fantasy VII

Cloud x Squall from Final Fantasy/KH series.

Hayffie from The Hunger Games.

TodoMomo from Boku Hero no Academia.

Gency from Overwatch series ( on and off )

RinMako from Free!

Terraqua from Kingdom Hearts series.

TOP 20 SHIPS OF THE PAST DECADE

20. Spuhura - Spock x Nyota Uhura (Star Trek original and reboot): Again this was another ship that I liked, since the original series, while everyone was Spirk this and that, I was like,’’yas, yas give me the sweet, sweet Spock and Uhura interactions’ and I was happy the reboot hooked them up, even if that ended dubiously but for a glorious moment, I had it.

19. Swarkles - Barney Stinson x Robin Scherbatsky (HIMYM): This is one of those ships I am bitter, bitter and salty about, there are more in this list in fact next spot is another one. But I loved it and I did think they complimented each other better than the wet noodle they stuck Robin with, they took the time to know the other, grown separately and then together, the episode where Barney proposed to Robin gave me all the feels and it was so sweet, and then fuck the writers deciding to do what they did. It’s no wonder the finale of this show is so hated.

18. Lotura - Lotor x Allura (Voltron Legendary Defender): When they announced a new reboot to Voltron I didn’t think much of it. I had fancied Lotor x Allura in the original series, as dubious as that was, but then I started to watch this Netflix thing and there was something between them, something more tangible and I was happy. It was this strong woman with an equally strong man encouraging her strength and not putting her in the box of the exotic pretty princess, like a certain dude, and wanted to know her mind and interests, they discovered things together and for a brief moment knew peace and I was here so happy that we were getting something good and then fuck the writers again that decided ‘Nah bro, you’re not getting it’ and you know to fuck off again. I will always have fan fiction I guess.

17. VinTi - Vincent Valentine x Tifa Lockhart (Final Fantasy VII series): This is a ship that I think started to like during my second playthrough of the game, I always figured the both could work, both having loved people that for one reason or another couldn’t fully love them back (Lucrecia due to damn guilt and Cloud because of Aerith) and both were mature enough to fit together, I just like them okay.

16. Helsa - Hans x Elsa (Frozen): Truly, I have never made it a secret that I really dislike this movie, I truly do. The only good things were Hans (which I am still huh at the ‘turns out he is evil’ I still call trolls) and Elsa (because of her damn powers) and then the next step was shipping them and honestly, he should have gone for the older sister lmao, they make more sense and there have very nice fiction out there.

15. Yuzuvier - Javier Fernandez x Yuzuru Hanyu (Figure Skating): Ahh, we have reached my dreaded and dark secret only RPF fancy. Be it broship or more, I always liked the friendship and camaraderie these two skaters had with each other, they were rink mates and rivals but above all friends. I was kokoro break when Yuzuru was telling Javi that he couldn’t do it without him and stop it you two. I just like them, they are wholesome.

14. Victuuri - Viktor Nikiforov x Yuuri Katsuki (Yuri!!! On Ice): And here we have another precious figure skating duo when I started to watch this series it was only because it was a figure skating anime and I love figure skating, I never expected to see a wholesome and wonderful healthy relationship to explode in front of me. The relationship between Viktor and Yuuri is just so lovely, so mature, they both worked through issues, grew from them and accepted them even and I can’t I love it. (Special mention here to Yurio x Mila, as is another ship I love from this series and so underrepresented).

13. Jonerys - Jon Snow x Daenerys Targaryen (ASOIAF/GoT): Regardless of the stupidity committed in the series, I have shipped them since the books, because I can read in between the lines and there are too many parallels between them and their journeys, ones that at will some point collide and bring them together in a way that will be worth it, so better make it count George.

12. Rhaegar Targaryen x Lyanna Stark (ASOIAF/GoT): Yes, mea culpa, I love tis ship and no one can shame me for liking it and boy has people tried to do so. Were these two smart of escaping like that and not saying a thing? Nope, they were so not. Was Brandon smart going to Kings Landing, knowing there was a crazy king with a penchant of burning people and demanding his heir's head? Nope, that was probably the stupidest move of all. Do I want to believe they loved each other? Why not? Martin has a penchant for tragic love stories, I know this ship is problematical for some, but I still love it and if you see spot 10 here, well I have varied tastes.

11. Soriku - Riku x Sora (Kingdom Hearts series): Come on, this is a given. Prior to Kairi appearing, it was clear Sora was Riku’s world and Riku’s was Sora, they were attached to the hip, the rivalry for Kairi more felt like Riku being jealous of Kairi and wanting Sora’s attention back. Then we have KH2 where Sora spent the whole damn game being all ‘Riku, Riku!’ and Riku doing his damn best to help him from the shadows, ashamed to be seen. DDD was more Riku protecting him and Sora leaning on him, even KH3 had Sora wanting to find and reach Riku, and then Riku going once again to find him by the end, so I am sorry but if there was a love story written here it was between these two.

10. Hannigram - Hannibal Lecter x Will Graham (Hannibal): Quite honestly, from all the things I ship, they are probably what one will consider the most toxic one I guess, which fair considering one part of the ship is a charismatic yet cannibalistic serial killer. But there was something in the way this relationship was developed by Fuller and brilliantly brought out by Mads and Hughs that just hooked me, their soft moments, their violent ones, it just somehow worked for me. I guess this is also one of the few canon ships that I have, funny enough.

09. Rivetra - Levi Ackerman x Petra Ral (Shingeki no Kyojin): Who will have thought that a series about human eating titans was going to give me one of my most everlasting and also shortlived OTP’s. Years can pass by and I will still love this ship, my heart will still believe there was something more between them, something that was realized or something that wasn’t, I don’t know, but I will forever love it and even though years have passed since she died, I always enjoy the hints here and there that he still remembers her or hints where we are supposed to do so.

08. Squinoa - Squall Leonhart x Rinoa Heartilly (Final Fantasy VIII): People can say whatever the fuck they want ‘the love story was rushed’ ‘we hate Rinoa’ (fuck you btw) but it doesn’t change the fact that Squall fell in love with her and that Rinoa helped him to open up, to not take things for granted and Squall taught her to be even stronger and conquer her fears, they helped each other grow and it’s what matters in the end.

07. Feanor x Nerdanel (Tolkien): This is probably, from all the romantic relationships that Tolkien has gifted us, which I have loved the most and held my attention the longest. They have the happy times, the ones that were full of joy when they met and fell in love and had their children, then we have the tumultuous times when he became too obsessed with this craft, the separation when he left with their kids leaving her behind in her pain and then their possible reencounter when he leaves the Halls of Mandos and how they might deal with it.

06. ItaHina - Itachi Uchiha x Hinata Hyuuga (Naruto): Both the heads of two of the most important clans of their villages, both with heavy expectations upon their shoulders that nearly broke them, only one was talented from the start and the other had to learn, yet they are also similar. Both love their siblings to a fault, sacrificing so much for them and their happiness, both seem to hate conflict yet know is necessary and both are devoted and loyal to a fault, they would have suited each other wonderfully, in an AU probably they would have gotten engaged, who knows, but it would have been wonderful.

05. SessKik - Sesshoumaru x Kikyou (Inuyasha): A ship that could have been but that we didn’t have. This is a ship that has been with me for years and I don’t plan to let it go, they were the best players (in a sense) in that game against Naraku, also probably the strongest, both level headed and smart, not easily intimidated and calculating, together they would have been quite a formidable force and it’s a shame we didn’t get to see that.

04. Bethyl - Daryl Dixon x Beth Greene (The Walking Dead): Another wasted potential and gone so soon, not to mention forever salty at the waste. The way they were being developed promised so much, in the few time he was with her, well, she taught him to have faith and it’s something that apparently still shows from times to times (I am not sure as I stopped with this show) and imagine how it will have gone if they had more time. Just a waste.

03. Romanogers - Steve Rogers x Natasha Romanov (Marvel/MCU): I have been shipping them for years, like honestly, and when the MCU was showing me the seeds of potentiality I was happy, not even that stupidity with Bruce killed my hope, as they still had this steady relationship, he trusted her and she trusted him, something that she couldn’t say of many, they had each others back and took care of the other...but again another wasted potential right there.

02. Huddy - Gregory House x Lisa Cuddy (House MD): I spent years, kind of, season after season watching the delicious and lovely UST between these two characters, watching them snark and then help each other, watching the ‘won’t they will they’ dance, waiting for the moment when these two will finally collide and my lord was it glorious when they finally did, and I was eager to see where it went, as they both seemed to be in relatively good places, but no once again forbid the writers to stop House from being self-destructive and another ship I had waited years was ruined.

01. Terrence "Terry" Graham Grandchester x Candice "Candy" White Adley (Candy Candy): And this is still my most important ship of the decade, I was forever bitter they never ended together and that their authors decided to make them suffer so much, but then Final Story came and all clues were pointing that aha they did found the other again and ended together as they were supposed to be, and before anyone says shizz, I did manage to read the novel and I do believe all hints were there to let us all know the identity of her husband was Terry and I am so happy.

And there it is, all the ships of the decade for me lol. Next stop, I should maybe make a list of mythos ships I like lmao.

#(;;blogger talks)#(;;blogger words)#(;;shipping and more)

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bethhxrmon · 6 years ago

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All I Ask of You Pt. 35

“Look how far we’ve come, we can’t give in. It’s one foot forward at a time, dust off all that grit and grime, we still have a lot left to do” - “Drive” from The Lightening Thief

Pairing: Peter Parker x Female OC

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: Some more Seattle shenanigans, a big part is coming!

Warnings: None???

A/N: Wooo! I’m getting these chapters out and the story is getting to an ending point. As always, I love hearing feedback and I also have the masterlist in my bio!

After what felt like hours, Peter and Annie finally got their drinks and left the coffee shop. Neither of them said anything for a few moments, and Annie was almost positive that she knew there was going to be some kind of question about what in the world had just happened. The worst part was, Annie wasn’t even sure what she would say about it. Even though, if it had been nearly nine months before, she would have had far more to say.

“So… I’m just a friend?” Peter asked.

Annie’s jaw dropped, “No, I just…”

“You didn’t want to tell her. Fine, but why? And are we going to be like that when we go back home? Because I want to know now before something like that happens again,” he said, looking down.

Annie frowned, “That was Jen, I didn’t want to tell her because she would see some form of weakness coming from me. And she probably would’ve brought you into it. I didn’t want that for you.”

“Well I could’ve taken it. You shouldn’t choose what I can and can’t handle. We’re not even going to see her again, so why does it even matter?” he questioned, looking over at her.

She sighed, holding onto the hot cup a little tighter with one hand and then using her free hand to pull Peter into an alleyway, “Look, I told you about everything that happened. Jen and Greg were a thing, I stole Jen’s role and I stole her kinda boyfriend. It was stupid, I was stupid. And she blames me for Greg killing himself, which is fine… well, not really fine, but that’s it’s own thing. And when I left, I thought I wouldn’t see her again, and then I see her and everything just kind of short circuited.”

“That’s supposed to make me feel better because… why?”

“Because, it’s not gonna happen again. Peter, I like you, I want to be with you. Trust me, if I didn’t think this was gonna work out, I would’ve said something by now.”

“Do you promise?”

Annie nodded, “Yeah, of course. Now let’s go find Ned and Harper.”

Though, they didn’t have to go far to find Ned and Harper practically sprinting down the street. Harper was dragging Ned, seeming completely confident in their direction. Ned, on the other hand, looked like a chicken running around with its head cut off.

“Hey… guys… Christ, that was a workout,” Harper panted, “We needed to find you quick…. Wait, you said… you were…” they paused for another breath, “Gonna be at the coffee shop.”

Annie grimaced, “About that… we got the caffeine, but Jen was there. Figured you wouldn’t wanna see her again.”

“Oh yeah, I totally hate that bitch. If you’d just listened to me the first time when I told you to not bother with her, you would’ve been fine,” they said.

Ned cleared his throat, “What about the actual important thing?”

“Oh, right… um… you see, when I was snooping around my parents’ place, as you do, there was a news broadcast. And, well, what had happened was, well-”

“Harper, just spit it out,” Annie said, taking a sip of her coffee.

Harper shook their head, “Carnival’s causing all kinds of destruction in the city. You guys need to get back there and, like, destroy him or something.”

“Y-you’re kidding, right?” Peter asked.

Ned frowned, “It’s not your fault, Peter, you guys needed to come up with something. We don’t know if Mr. Stark knows yet, but we figured that we should tell you guys as soon as we found out.”

“I knew something like this was happening. This is why I didn’t think leaving was a good idea. Just, we needed to stay closer. Now we’re over here and we need to get there. How bad is it?” Peter asked.

"It's pretty bad, but it's something that can wait another day. We can't just hop on over to New York, Peter. I know that's not what you wanted to hear, but you know it's true. We just all need to take a deep breath and find Tony and Pepper quickly and we'll figure it out," Harper assured with a small smile, "Now, let's go get some coffee because I'm actually exhausted from all that running and sneaking around."

Annie grinned a little, "Oh yeah, how did the whole 'running around my parents' house' deal work out?"

"It went about as well as you could expect. The tuatara guy almost got us caught. But Ned was actually a freaking great lookout," Harper said, heading in a different direction.

Ned shrugged, "What can I say, I'm waiting for the CIA to sign me up already."

"I figured you'd be waiting on SHIELD or something like that," Annie commented.

Peter pouted, "I thought you were just gonna stay my guy in the chair for the rest of our natural born lives."

"I'd love to do that, but being guy in the chair pays about as well as being Spider-Man does," Ned responded.

Annie laughed, "That was some serious shade."

"Whoops... I was only pointing out the obvious," Ned said.

The teens continued down, Harper and Annie leading the way as the rain started to clear up to a slight mist. Annie wasn't sure what she should say to Peter, of there was even anything else that he wanted her to say. How in the world was she supposed to know? Everyone always claimed that girls were difficult, but Annie was finding guys to be just as difficult, if not even more so. Sure, Annie wasn't always blatant with what she wanted, but would it have killed Peter to tell her what she could have done to make things better? Then again, they had sort of been interrupted before they could really get anywhere.

Still, Peter reached out for her hand, holding it tightly. Annie breathed a small sigh of relief. Maybe he did believe her. There was no reason for him to not believe her, right? She hadn't done anything that was meant to hurt him before, and she wasn't going to start now. If anything, she wanted to try and protect him. A part of her wasn't even sure if she wanted to go back to New York. Why couldn't they just stay in Seattle? Why couldn't they just go back to Lake Tahoe and then never go anywhere else? Life would be so much easier and she could deal with whatever baggage she had there. Then, maybe if things cleared up enough, they could both consider going ahead and travel around for a little bit.

Except, Annie knew that she was neglecting some of the more obvious facts. They both had to go back to school once the summer was over. Not to mention, they both had powers. Peter always felt obligated to help people, and Annie knew that if she didn't use her powers, she would more than likely go insane. That was what had nearly happened last time. And maybe that was because she had completely isolated herself, but she also didn't doubt that ignoring her power had contributed at least a tiny bit.

"Okay, we're here, the second best coffee shop in this lovely city," Harper chirped, opening the door.

Peter looked around, "YOu don't think they'll get mad that we have some other place's coffee?"

"Not if we buy a pastry or something. Granted, most places don't care as long as you're just not loitering around. It's a city, Peter, just think about what you would normally do," Annie told him, squeezing his hand a little bit.

Ned sighed, "I um... I kinda left my wallet in my room."

"No worries, I'll cover it," Harper said, pulling out their wallet.

He shook his head, "You really don't need to do that."

"But I really insist."

"But you shouldn't, you're gonna be a broke college student."

"But it hasn't happened yet, I'm fine on money."

"But I don't want you to."

"Shut up and let me pay for your damn coffee," Harper sighed, shaking their head.

The barista looked between the four teens and smiled uncertainly, "Hello, what can I get you all?"

"I'll have one black coffee, and he'll have..." Harper trailed off.

"Um... a caramel macchiato," Ned finished.

Annie looked between Harper and Ned before leaning towards Peter, "Five bucks that they admit to having crushes on each other before we leave Lake Tahoe."

"That's gonna literally be in less than twenty four hours. Not gonna happen. I'm not taking the bet," Peter whispered.

She smirked, "Because you're scared of losing."

"No, I don't want you losing your money."

"Fine, whoever loses has to take the other out on the date of their dreams."

Peter looked at Annie, "You know it's so not going to happen. Ned hasn't had a crush on someone in ages."

"Because he hadn't met Harper yet. I know chemistry when I see it."

"Like how you know physics?"

"Shut up, Arachnerd, are you taking the bet or not?" Annie asked, crossing her arms.

Peter sighed, "Fine, I'll take it. But you better be ready to plan out the best Star Wars marathon that I've ever had."

"Deal, that's gonna be so easy. I just need to show up."

"You're lucky you're cute," Peter replied, rolling his eyes.

Annie gasped, "That's my thing! You're the cute one."

"I beg to differ."

"Yo, Lovebirds, are you getting anything or not?" Harper asked, looking between peter and Annie.

Annie thought a moment, "Yep, let's get one of those freaking huge chocolate muffins."

After finding a table and waiting for Tony and Pepper, the teenagers seemed about as calm as they could get. Which really meant everyone but Peter was relaxed. He, on the other hand, was shaking like crazy and looked like he was about to stand up and pace around the whole coffee shop.

“That’s not gonna make waiting go by any faster,” Harper remarked.

Peter sighed, “I know, but people are getting hurt.”

“People get hurt without some crazy monster terrorizing them,” Annie pointed out, “If we didn’t do this, we’d be going into a fight completely blind. Remember what happened the first time?”

“Hey, in all fairness you shocked me.”

“Not the point. We both still almost died, and that’s just what would’ve happened over and over again. But I feel like we’re actually ready now. And I would rather go into something knowing that things were going to turn out okay than end up dying.”

“Do we always need to talk about getting killed?” Ned asked.

Harper shrugged, “It’s an angsty high schooler thing, just saying.”

Right then, Tony and Pepper made it into the coffee shop, “Alright, kids, we gotta go. We’re leaving tomorrow morning.”

“Can’t we just leave now, Mr. Stark?” Peter asked.

Tony shook his head, “Not a great idea, you guys are gonna have it rough leaving tomorrow as it is, leaving now would make it a bit worse. And we don’t even have our things together.”

“I think having one last night with everyone together like this would be good for us,” Annie said.

Pepper nodded, “Exactly, and then after all this is over, we can let you guys all recoup together.”

“I don’t remember agreeing to that,” Tony said.

Pepper raised an eyebrow, “So you were just going to have them all go back home so suddenly?”

“Either way, we need to go now! How can you think otherwise?” Peter asked.

Annie reached for his hand, “Because, it won’t make too much of a difference. Carnival is slow-acting, we’ll get it figured out. Trust me.”

“Your girlfriend’s got a point, we can leave after we’re all rested and packed tomorrow, so let’s get a jumpstart on both of those things,” Tony replied.

Annie nodded, getting up. It still felt odd, thinking about whether or not Tony was her biological father. The odds weren’t completely there, but crazier things had happened to her. But she wasn’t going to mention it to the others until she was positive it was true or not. And she wasn’t sure if Tony had done the same either.

And before she knew it, they were on the plane to go back to Lake Tahoe. Was she ready to leave again? It still felt like there was something about the city that she just couldn’t get anywhere else, but there were also things back in New York that she couldn’t get anywhere else either. She stared out the window intently, just trying to grasp the last bits of her home that she could.

Peter wrapped an arm around her, “Hey, we’ll come back here sometime, okay?”

“Well, yeah, I’d drag you back here if I had to,” she responded, smiling at him.

No one ever said that she couldn’t just visit Seattle every once in awhile. How could anyone just leave somewhere that they loved? Sure, there were things she didn’t like, but there was so much more that she cared about.

Tag List (if you wanna be added, just ask!): @flushings-here / @gaypanda / @twilightparker / @parkerpuff / @ironmaxn / @lcy-thot / @buzzinglee / @dolphinsarecuteandstuff / @moonstruckholland

#peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #peter parker x oc #mcu #spider-man #spider-man x oc #spider-man x reader #spider-man: homecoming #spider-man: far from home #mcu fanfic #marvel #all i ask of you fic

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sunshinemossboy · 6 years ago

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which is your fav ahs season

WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME I CAN'T DECIDE????!!

I'm just gonna be extra as hell and list my pros and cons... get ready for a long ass answer sorrynotsorry you're dealing with a writer here:

Murder House

just gonna say it - overrated

I do appreciate it because it sparked the rest of AHS

created some iconic characters

in hindsight, at least Tate is better than Kai

still a really good concept

a bit boring at times though

Jessica Lange is fucking superb

lowkey started trend of Lily Rabe's characters either dying or already being dead and me no likey that so much

Francis Conroy talking about men is always great but I liked the more subtle hints to her speeches this time

Asylum

LANA BANA BO BANA BANANA FANA FO FANA FE FI MO MANA, LANA

Sarah Paulson and Lily Rabe were ICONIC in this season holy fckin christ

so was Jessica Lange

and Zachary Quinto

basically the characters had really good like writing and rounding out and such

but wtf was with the alien subplot??

some damn good writing

while I do not approve of Sister Mary Satan raping the monsignor I can never get "There was a priest, the dirty beast, his name was Alexander. His mighty dick was inches thick, he called it Salamander" out of my head

Jude and Kit at the end was so sweet

Coven

honestly at times bit off more than they could chew with the subplots, not all of those were really resolved

Jessica Lange somehow even more iconic

same with Kathy Bates and Angela Bassett, what QUEENS

Foxxay

seriously both Misty and Cordelia are adorable on their own, and together I just can't handle it

STEVIE NICKS

the music in this season provokes an emotional response from me

"Can we please not move things? Some of us are blind!"

*stuffs bagels into bag* "Who's takin me home?"

Myrtle Snow calmly playing that instrument while Cordelia had a breakdown

those all black looks were good shit

Freak Show

this shit was SAD AS HELL

like literally how they killed all the characters was fucking gut wrenching

also Pepper? at Briarcliff?? seeing that magazine with Elsa on it??? I cry every time

once again proved the crazy talent of Sarah Paulson

at least Lily Rabe was kinda there

despite being a little shit Dandy was a great character

last time they had some really long episodes, or at least varied between 45 min and longer, which I liked bc I think it let them do quite a bit

I want Sarah Paulson's cover of Criminal to play at my funeral or my wedding or goddamn something ugh

"We might not be on a farm but something sure smells like bullshit to me" (paraphrased)

I can't believe they made me feel so damn bad for a scary clown dude, he didn't deserve that

Hotel

the fucking style? and music? SUPERB

"I FUCKING LIVE HERE"

when Iris was gonna off herself and made that video

I have a love/hate relationship with John Lowe 'cause he kinda stupid

Evan Peters looking like Spongebob as a fancy waiter

Lady Gaga and Matt Bomer drenched in blood

everything about Liz Taylor was like beautiful

somehow the vampire thing worked

could (should) have used literally any song other than hotline bling

Devil's Night was great but then they made an inconsistency with the zodiac killer in Cult

aT lEaSt LiLy RaBe WaS kInDa ThErE

loved it when Billie came back

Roanoke

enjoyed the documentary style and kudos to Ryan for doing something different

with that being said it was pretty predictable and cliche

so damn happy to see Lily Rabe back

favorite fan promo thing I saw: "Lily Rabe is back and she has a gluten allergy and questionable judgement" (paraphrased but hilarious and accurate)

wish they had time to round out the actor characters (Audrey, Monet, etc)

RIP an accent 2016-2016

still though, it brought some good people back into the cast

good call with Adina Porter, she's amazing

"I'm not American, I'm not used to all this carnage!"

honestly a lot of Audrey's lines were great

and her reaction to Shelby's death holy fuck that honestly startled me

Cricket Marlowe looking like Danny Devito in that one episode of Always Sunny

Cult

I liked how they worked phobias into it

a good deal of the sexual stuff just made me really uncomfortable, like especially when it was directed at Ally (or Ivy I guess), idk I think as a lesbian myself it felt like they were pushing all this phallic shit on her and challenging her sexuality which just really rubbed me the wrong way (my take on it, anyway)

Ally's character development though goddamn

Ally in general, she was so fckin cute ugh

I feel like they made Ivy too dislikable? like she could've had SOME redeeming qualities but nah

Kai was fucking awful

people shit on Winter as a character but I still think Billie Lourd acted wonderfully

why do all of Emma Roberts' characters have to be such bitches? lol

still don't know how I feel about it ending with Ally supposedly like becoming leader of the SCUM group or whatever

loved that they used extreme stereotypes of both conservatives and liberals

Apocalypse

they killed Venable too soon

she and Mead were so extra together I loved it

MISTY IS BAAAAACK

again, Foxxay (they better kiss and be happy by the end of this season I stg)

Cordelia's vision was terrifying, like she got her throat torn out jfc

if Cordelia (or, hell, even Billie) die too I'm going to be 2-3 times more heartbroken than I already am about Venable

especially excited to see Mallory's character develop

I both love and hate Michael Langdon

Leslie Grossman still getting all the wack, iconic one-liners

BD Wong being in it was lowkey hilarious to me bc I've only ever seen him in SVU before

"Because I'm the FUCKING Supreme"

can't wait to get more Billie Dean Howard

Jessica Lange! it's been so long, how ya been?

where the hell did Brock go after he broke in to kill Coco? did he just fuck off back into the wastelands?

Ryan, USE LILY RABE'S TALENT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD even if she doesn't stay for long this season (plz let Misty be okay and while I don't quite think it'll happen I'm still hoping to see Nora) bring her back sometime with another major character I miss her so much

I'm excited to see more!

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let-it-raines · 6 years ago

Text

Frozen Peas (2/2)

Summary: Emma Swan and Killian Jones are not coworkers. Okay, they kind of are. Emma Swan and Killian Jones are not friends either. Okay, maybe they kind of are. Honestly, Emma’s not sure what’s up and what’s down when it comes to Killian Jones...well, that’s also not true. She knows one thing that’s up.

Rating: Mature (it’s cocktoberfest peeps)

A/N: Hey all! Here’s part two of my contribution to @cscocktoberfest! This brings us to completion, and I hope that it’s a satisfying one. No part of me expected the reaction I got from everyone on here for part one but WOW, and I really, truly hope that you guys feel the same way about part two.

Chapter one on Tumbler found | here |

Entire story along with everything else I’ve written found on ao3 | here |

Tag list: @kmomof4 @resident-of-storybrooke @ekr032-blog-blog @jennjenn615 @onceuponaprincessworld @bmbbcs4evr @wellhellotragic @profdanglaisstuff @mayquita @teamhook @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @cs-forlife @branlovesouat

Everybody still hate me from how I ended the last one? Maybe we can change things this go round. If not, I’m at work and totally won’t see any yelling until later ;D

Three months ago:

“Emma, w–what are you doing?”

She looks up from her position perched by his hips, her mouth still fully encasing his length, thank goodness for morning erections, so she can’t talk, can’t respond without releasing him and she’s not going to do that. So she just hums around him, making his cock throb in the wetness of her mouth and making Killian throw his head back against the pillow while thrusting his hips slightly up into her. He’s still got control of himself, the siren of sleep still calling to him more than she is, and that just won’t do.

She is much more interesting than sleep.

It’s not very ladylike, at least judging by what she’s picked up from her more demure friends, but she’s never been one to follow social norms. She loves the way he tastes on her lips and her tongue, the saltines of the velvety skin something she craves in the light of the early morning when the rest of his body hasn’t woken up yet so the only things he feels are her mouth around him and her arms resting on his legs, fingers trailing along the soft hair that covers the muscles of his thighs to keep him from canting his hips up into her mouth.

“Love,” he groans when she releases him only to run her tongue flat against his length from his base until she’s circling his tip, slowly dragging the tip of her tongue against him as she adds her hand to his base, twisting and turning lightly to work him higher. “Oh, gods, Swan, you’ve gotta –”

He can’t finish his statement because she’s encasing his cock with her lips again, bobbing her head as she tries to take him in further, and the way he’s breathing and moaning has her absolutely aching with no real relief coming when she clinches her thighs together in search of something.

From her peripheral she sees Killian’s arm twitch, his fingers clinching at his side, and she knows he wants to put his fingers in her hair, guide her to the perfect rhythm, but he always holds back. It doesn’t matter how many times she does this, how much she encourages him to take what he wants, he always holds back until she gives him permission.

Trying to be a gentleman when she’s giving him a damn blowjob.

So she reaches her free hand forward to grab his clenched fist as she hollows out her cheeks and moves to take him in as fully as she can. She thinks Killian might die from pleasure from the way he’s whimpering. The frustrating man doesn’t get the hint until she’s literally putting his hand in her hair and he’s running his fingers through the base of it, pulling at her strands until he gets her in the perfect rhythm for him, a quick up and down motion that takes both of their breaths away.

He’s quiet this morning, not muttering as many of his usual encouragements that she longs to hear, but she doesn’t take it as an insult. No, he’s quiet because he can’t speak because of the pleasure he’s taking from her mouth, just soft little grunts and groans that have her constantly clenching her legs together at how much his reactions to her turn her on.

He really fucking turns her on. It’s insane just how attracted she is to him all the time, especially now when she looks up to see the trail of black hair that goes from his hips and over his abs, all the way up to his chest. His eyes are blown wide, locked on her as she scrapes her teeth gently against him, wishing he was the slightest bit smaller for things like this…but not at all for when they get down to the real thing. She winks at him before going back to pay attention to the task at hand…or at mouth.

“Love, you’ve gotta – ah fuck – I’m not going to be able to hold on if you keep going.”

He’s panting, and instead of heading his words, she keeps going, increasing her pace until he doesn’t have control of his hips anymore and he’s spilling himself into her mouth as she sucks him dry.

He once told her there were few things he loves more than spilling himself into her, no matter how it happens, and just the thought of how husky his voice was when he muttered those words has her almost ready to come.

This man does incredible things to her.

When she finally releases him, a loud, wet popping sound accompanying her, she almost immediately feels the need to brush her teeth, but Killian’s pulling her up his body so that he can slant his lips over hers as his hand traces down her spine, light touches as he taps his fingers against her skin until his palm lands on her ass, squeezing it ever so softly before grasping the cheek with more conviction, his nails likely leaving crescent moon imprints.

She wants to whimper at that.

She does.

“What did I do to deserve that this morning? I thought my birthday was yesterday.”

“It was,” she purrs, moving to give him several chaste kisses, each one getting longer than the last while her foot runs along his calf, his hand still palming her ass, “and now that I think about it, while that was a wonderfulway to start both of our mornings and while we’re definitely not finished, I really want some of the leftover cake in your fridge from your party last night.”

“Oh yeah?” he questions, rolling them over so that she’s on her back, kissing down the side of her neck until he reaches her shoulder, resting his head against the skin there and breathing her in as she does the same.

He smells like a mixture of sweat and his cologne from the night before, and she loves it.

She thinks she might love him, and she doesn’t know what to do with that information. Would that be crazy? To love him?

Sometimes he’ll look at her like every strand on her head is full of magic and like the lines of her face are lines he’d be content to trace for the rest of her days. He’ll look at her like she’s the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen, and he’ll look at her in a way that makes her actually believe it.

But then other days they’ll get in these knock down, drag out arguments over something stupid like him not telling her he got hurt at work. Okay, that’s not stupid. That’s serious, but she’ll find the cut running against his stomach and the stitches healing it and be fucking pissed that he didn’t tell her. Maybe that makes her believe she loves him, too.

She’d walked into his apartment one day with her hands full of pizza and beer only to find him laid out on his couch with his shirt off, his abs on display right next to the ugliest gash she’s ever seen. She drops the pizza and the beer, thankful the bottles land on the rug and don’t shatter.

“What the hell happened to you?”

“Tis nothing.”

“That doesn’t look like nothing.”

He stares up at her for a moment, and she can see him fighting himself on whether or not to tell the truth. “I went out into the field unprepared, and this drug dealer I’d been helping track, you know the guy with one eye, he snuck up on me and stabbed me in the gap of my vest before fleeing.”

“When did this happen?”

He grimaces, and it’s not from the stab wound.

“Two days ago.”

He fucking got stabbed two days ago and didn’t tell her. They’ve talked several times in the past two days, and he somehow didn’t think to tell her? Now she’s pissed when she should be sympathetic, kind, and probably anything other than pissed.

“Why didn’t you tell me you got fucking stabbed, you idiot?”

“Because I didn’t want you to worry!”

“And me coming over onto find you laid out on the couch with an angry red slash in your skin means I won’t worry?”

“No, it means you’ll worry after I know everything is okay so there’s no need for you worry.”

“What if things hadn’t been okay, Killian?” She’s pacing now, her hands raised in the air as her mind races. She is not overreacting. He has a fucking knife wound. “What then? You would have died, and I never would have known until I came into the precinct one day looking for you only for your partner to be, like, ‘sorry, Detective Jones was murdered last week.’ What the hell kind of logic is that?”

Oh God, she’s going to cry. She doesn’t want to cry, but she can feel the tears stinging in her eyes even as she swipes them away while they fall to her cheeks.

She feels his arms around her before she can try to blink away the tears that keep falling. She immediately buries her face in his shoulder, her nose nuzzling into the place where the scar from where he was once shot remains. Damn, his job is dangerous, and it shouldn’t be like that. He should be safe. She needs him to be safe.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers into her hair while his fingers rub her back. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t do the right thing. I should have called you as soon as I could. I promise the next time I get stabbed or shot or punched in the face I’ll call you before the bloody knife is even out of my body.”

A watery chuckle escapes her while she shakes her head against his shoulder. “Maybe you could try not to get hurt again. I’d want that over anything else.”

“You know I can’t promise that.” She feels him shift his head to kiss her hair, but she can’t feel the kiss. She wishes she could feel the kiss. She really wants to feel the kiss. “But I’m going to do more behind the scenes work now, okay? You know I love paperwork.”

“You hate paperwork.”

“Yeah, but I’ve got some things in my life I’d like to stick around for.”

“Yeah?”

He pulls back and pushes her forward so that his hands rest on her shoulders while he smiles down at her, his blue eyes the slightest bit watery.

“I just bought a kick-ass Camaro.”

Now his grin is as cheeky as can be before he dips down and captures her lips, his tongue immediately swiping at the seam of her lips while she whimpers in response, so relieved to simply be connected like this again.

“What about me?”

“I thought that was obvious, my Swan.”

She’s pretty sure that she loves him, and she knowsthat he loves her. She guesses that’s what scares her. He so obviously loves her, and if she fucks up, she doesn’t just mess with her own feelings, she messes with his.

He doesn’t deserve that, even if she knows that she’s hurting him every moment she doesn’t let him acknowledge those feelings, even if he hasn’t brought that up in the past few months. She’s scared, okay? It doesn’t matter how irrational it is. Love is scary no matter what, and Emma has decided to hide her feelings away to keep herself from being terrified, no matter how awful that course of action is. She can have Killian this way, and it seems to be going just fine.

“Yeah,” she finally answers to Killian’s question, running her hand through the hair at the nape of his neck before crawling out from underneath him and slipping one of his t-shirts over her head and walking to the kitchen.

Cake beats sex just this one time. It’s really good, okay?

That’s where he finds her several minutes later, eating the cake straight out of a container while propped up on the counter, legs swinging beneath her as the taste of buttercream icing fills her mouth.

Is it too dirty for her to say that this is the second best cream that’s been in her mouth all morning?

Is she really worrying about if the jokes she’s making in her head are too dirty when she just gave a good morning blowjob?

She’s twenty-eight years old, and she can eat cake for breakfast if she wants to.

Cake and Killian apparently.

And she can also make those dirty jokes if she wants to.

“I’m not sure if this is better or worse than the pop tarts you usually eat for your morning nutrients, Swan.”

Killian steps between her thighs, moving her legs over so that he can stand nestled in her embrace.

“Better,” she mumbles, sticking another forkful in her mouth while looping her legs around his waist pulling him closer to her so that she can feel the heat of his body, “much more like a delicacy because I don’t keep cake in my apartment.”

“Do you want to use a plate? You know, for sanitary reasons?”

Emma just glares at him before rolling his eyes. Sometimes his neat freak ways go too far. “I think if anybody can stomach eating after me, it’d be you of all people. We’re not exactly ones to shy away from sharingthings with each other. Besides, you don’t even like cake.”

“I like the icing.”

“Duh, that’s the best part, Jones.”

A beat passes.

“So how does it feel to be thirty-one? Firmly in your thirties and all that. Do you feel old yet? Like your life is on a downhill spiral to gray hair and Sunday night bingo?”

“Not so much this morning,” he admits, lips ticking up on one side as he places his hands on the countertop on either side of her, leaning down to kiss her shoulder through the cloth of her – his– t-shirt. She loves when he does things like that. “And as you can see, I’ve retained my youthful glow.” He chastely pecks her lips before leaning his forehead against hers. “How long do I have you today?”

“If you let me eat this cake off of the tray without grimacing every time I lick my fork before getting another bite, you can have me until you have to go to work tomorrow. Then maybe after that, too.”

“Deal.”

It’s the perfect lazy day. They keep the curtains in the living room closed all day so that no light pokes through, the entire place shaded in darkness that’s only eased from the floor lamp in the corner of the living room and the light of the television. Neither of them get dressed, Emma in just the t-shirt and Killian in his boxers, and it makes for an easier time when Emma finally gets to ease the ache in her thighs from where she didn’t get to earlier.

Cake only beats sex for so long.

They’re lying on the coach, her back pressed against his front with their legs tangled together, the sensation of his leg hair running against her bare legs causing a slight tingling sensation as she languidly rubs her legs over his in return. She’s about to doze off, sleep calling to her, when she feels Killian’s hand snake up underneath her shirt, fingernails tracing against her skin until his nail circles an areola, slowly, torturously,wonderfully.

“Killian,” she moans, reaching back to run her fingers through his hair, pulling him closer so that his head moves closer to her neck, and she can feel the heat of his breath.

“Have I ever told you how much I love your breasts, Swan?”

Heat immediately coils in her belly.

“A few times,” she admits as his nail moves to her nipple and his lips move to press sloppy kisses against her neck.

“They’re bloody glorious, love. The weight of them in my hands,” he cups her breast before moving his hand back to her stomach, pulling her back so that she’s nestled further into him, no space between them, “is so perfect. Your pink nipples call to me, and I know that you love when I run my tongue against them, tasting you.”

She can’t say anything, just whimpers as he runs his tongue behind her ear and his hand down to her folds, fingers teasing the wetness that’s already pooled there from the way they’ve been languidly touching all day.

“Lift your leg over my hip, darling.”

She complies, not even questioning his intentions as she feels him pull his boxers down, his cock hard as it lands against her folds, slapping at her clit.

“Fuck,” she moans just at the sensation of him lightly touching her.

He has to lift her leg higher over his hip so that he can slowly slide into her, the gradual fullness making her breath hitch because she has to adjust to his size in this position.

Well, every position, but especially this one.

“You feel so good like this, Swan,” he groans, snapping his hips into her at a leisurely pace, his hand still harshly palming her breast, “so bloody tight around me. So wet around me, for me.”

“Killian,” she whines as he continues at the slowest pace she’s ever experienced in her entire life, and it’s wonderful. He slips out of her for a moment, the sensation of being empty not one that she likes, but then he’s sinking back into her with a deep thrust and reaching further around to continue fondling her breasts underneath her t-shirt, his calloused fingers heightening the sensations as he finally moves to toy with her right nipple. He was right. She loves when he does things like this.

“Being inside of you is one of the great wonders of the world. I never want to not be like this.”

She can’t speak. Hell, she can barely breathe.

It’s totally worth it.

She can feel every movement inside of her, the contracting of her walls as his velvety length pushes and pulls and pulses inside of her, gasps wracking her body and causing her to pant as Killian softly grunts with every thrust until she turns her head and captures his lips with hers, their tongues running over teeth and against each other, a slick, wet slide of increased sensations while Killian continues to slide into her slick heat.

Killian Jones, well, falling into bed with Killian Jones has got to be one of the best decisions of her life. She’s never experienced sex like she does with him, like her skin is constantly burning but never burning out. He’s magnificent, and he knows it. He’s magnificent, and sheknows it. She knows it and feels it all the way down to her toes as his grip on her breast tightens, walking that fine line between pleasure and pain as his thrusts become more insistent, more powerful in their strokes.

Oh God, she’s on fire.

It’s just not hot enough quite yet.

The entire thing is a slow burn, a continuous build up to a peak that she doesn’t think she’s going to reach. But out of nowhere, it’s there, her heartbeat pounding as she falls, Killian coming soon after with a few hard thrusts as the sound of their skin slapping each other and their harsh pants reverberates throughout the apartment.

They lay tangled together for awhile, his breath brushing against her neck as her hand strokes through his hair, a soothing embrace that has the two of them lulled into a comfortable silence until she feels Killian almost completely soften inside of her, and he has to pull away from her, peppering kisses across her face and her stomach when he gets up to go get a towel.

It’s only after he’s cleaned them up and nestled back behind her that he speaks again, his low, dulcet accent curling around his tongue and into her ear. “That’s my favorite.”

“Your favorite what?”

“My favorite position, my favorite pace. I like the slowness of it all, the way I can feel every slide and every flutter, the way you whimper with every movement. Don’t get me wrong. I love when I’m thrusting into you so harshly that you scream my name in pleasure, but there’s…there’s something special about what we just did. That’s why it’s my favorite.”

“Mine too,” she admits, twisting her head back so she can capture his lips between hers, neither of them pushing to make it anything more than just a simple slide of their lips together before Killian pulls a blanket up over their bodies and nestles his head on her shoulder and his arm over her waist.

They end up watching some cop show that’s on cable, neither of them bothering to find the remote even with Killian complaining about how inaccurate everything about it is.

“It’s just not feasible,” he groans, running his fingers across her stomach again, but this time with no intent of taking it further. “They’re breaking so many laws and none of this is protocol. And don’t even get me started on how everyone has fucked each other. That just doesn’t happen.”

“It’s a tv show. It’s not supposed to be entirely accurate.”

“Yeah, but this is what people think I do.”

“People think you break the law to solve your cases and then go at it with your super hot female partner in the interrogation room?”

“Not what I meant, Swan.” He presses his fingers into her stomach, pulling her back into him and pressing a soft kiss to the side of her neck that sends tingles down her spine. “Though the hot bail bondsperson who works with them is entirely accurate.”

“Shut up.”

“I’m serious, Swan. You’re bloody gorgeous. I know for a fact that every cop at work wants you.” She knows the words he doesn’t say are but I get you. “Though, they don’t know how brilliant you are,” he kisses her neck again, “or how witty, always keeping me on my toes,” his fingers dance across her stomach, “or how you dance when you’re waiting for food to heat up in the microwave because you refuse to use the oven unless I’m cooking,” he nuzzles his nose into the back of her hair, “and they definitely don’t know that you’re so bloody fierce that you could probably take all of our jobs. I know those things, though, darling.”

She doesn’t say anything, doesn’t know what to say. That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to her. The only things that come close…well, Killian said those things, too. A part of her wants to run, to untangle herself from his grasp and to run away because of the strength of his feelings for her…and hers for him. But she doesn’t trulywant to. She just wants to have a day where she can be happy and content and not have to worry about anything.

So she just twists her head so that she can chastely press her lips against his and then kiss his throat, right over where she can feel his heart beat, before turning around and cuddling back into him, the warmth of his skin making her entire body experience some kind of slow burn.

Always burning. Never burning out.

“I think you’re brilliant, too,” she whispers in the dark of the night, the television show having long ended as infomercials flicker across the screen.

He’s quiet for a moment, his hold on her waist tightening as he kisses her shoulder in the spot she’s come to call his spot. The spot that mirrors the scar on his own shoulder. “Yeah?” he whispers, the deepness of his voice making it louder than he intends.

“Yeah,” she answers, turning in his arms so the she can face him, nuzzling her nose against his. “And I’ll kill you if you tell anyone I said this, but you’re the funniest person I know, even when most of your jokes are dirty.” He kisses her forehead before kissing her nose again, and she can’t help but smile. “And I like that when you’re in a good mood, you smile with your entire face. You have smile lines around your eyes, and even though you think it’s just because you’re old, I think they make you more handsome. And I like that you cook for me so I don’t have to use the microwave except to heat up the leftovers.”

He kisses her then, soft and sweet before pulling back to look her in the eyes. His are so, so blue. It’s not fair. “Thank you, darling.”

They don’t speak anymore that night, just Emma making a simple oomphsound when Killian lifts her off the couch and carries her back to his bedroom, nestling back into her and pulling her backside into him with his hand resting over her chest, over her heart.

By the time she wakes up the next morning, Killian is already at work, but a piece of cake (on a plate) is sitting on the bedside table next to her with a piece of paper underneath.

Emma,

I didn’t want to wake you, beautiful, but I had to go to work. The past few days have been wonderful. Thanks for spending them with me and making it one of my best birthdays. One of my best days, really. Turns out you can have your cake and eat it, too.

xoxo Killian

Now

He wasn’t in his apartment when she woke up then, and he’s mostly likely not here now. Though, the two different mornings, while on the surface similar, feel entirely different. He’s not in the bathroom, and he’s not in his living room. She was right in her suspicion. He’s nowhere to be seen. On other mornings like this, even if he’s not in bed with her, he’s in one of those places, but he’s not anywhere to be found.

Instead of finding Killian, she finds her phone on the kitchen counter, placed next to a note that she must have missed in her frantic (not that she’ll admit to that) search for Killian.

Swan,

I got called into work early. I don’t know when I’ll be home so you don’t have to bother waiting. You know the drill. You’re welcome to anything you want in the kitchen and the Netflix account on the television.

Jones

She doesn’t know the drill, though. Besides the one time, he’s never left her in his apartment before, not without the promise of coming back with coffee and something to eat. A part of her wants to stay, to lounge on his couch wrapped up in his shirt until he gets home, but it feels wrong, dirty almost. The tone of his note not obviously harsh, but it is for Killian. She knows him well enough to know when he’s pissed, even when she can’t see the tick of his jaw or the clench of his teeth. So she finds some of the clothes she keeps in his closet, slipping into jeans and a t-shirt before slipping out the door.

She doesn’t see him for the rest of the week. He doesn’t call. He doesn’t text unless she texts him first, and then his responses are curt, so different than the flowery language he usually uses. She offers to come over one night with takeout from his favorite Chinese food to try to clear the air between them, but he texts back that he’s busy with work, his go to excuse lately. He’s never worked this goddamn much in his life. She tries not to overthink it, tries to convince herself that whatever he got called into work for is important, and he really is just busy this week. But she finds herself missing him, and while it’s not a foreign feeling, it’s weird knowing that if she calls, he might not answer. That’s never happened before.

He’s always been there for her.

Without fail.

She’s fucked up.

By the time their weekly dinner rolls around, she’s sitting on the edge of her seat, Mary Margaret telling her about some of her students from school while Emma listens to see if she can hear movement outside the front door. When that movement never comes, she realizes that Killian isn’t either, and it hurts even more than she was expecting it to. And she was expecting it to hurt.

She can’t tell Mary Margaret what is going on, and she desperately wants to. She wants to tell her that she’s been sleeping with Killian, and now he’s not talking to her.

And she wants to tell her that she thinks she’s fallen for Killian, too, but she can barely tell herself that most days. She hasn’t let herself really think…those words…since Killian’s birthday a few months ago. She won’t let herself think them now.

Instead she goes to a bakery and buys a small birthday cake to eat, and it’s quite possibly one of the saddest things she’s ever done.

It’s even sadder when she eats it in the dark of her living room watching a marathon of the cop shows she and Killian love to hate.

It really is the saddest when she goes into her room and finds one of his plaid shirts, wrapping herself in it as the tears fall down her cheeks and the sobs make her body shake.

She loves him. She finally admits it to herself when it’s three in the morning, and she’s eaten almost all of the cake and consumed almost half of a bottle of rum. And she’s the biggest idiot in the world for not telling him and not letting him love her in return.

But he was the one who left.

She’s the one who fucked up by making him push his feelings aside because she was ignoring her own, but he’s the one who left. How is she supposed to make things better if he won’t talk to her?

In a move that she’s not proud of, she purposely finds a skip that requires her to slip into a little black dress, this one with a neckline that exposes almost every bit of her breasts because Killian is most definitely a boob’s man, and apply red lipstick to her lips before going out. Handcuffing the guy is easy, and she’s at the precinct in no time, paperwork filled out in the blink of an eye. She figures that tonight Killian will finally get out of this funk he’s in and at least talk to her, but as she saunters over to his desk, making sure that her hips sway with her steps, he’s not there. Instead he’s very hurriedly going through the doors she’s not allowed through, not a glance in her direction even though she knows he saw her, a flash of blue before he disappears from sight.

Something rises in her throat, and she pushes it down before it can become a thing, not even bothering to wait for him to come back. He’s obviously not coming back.

They don’t talk for three more weeks. She sees him when she brings people in, but they don’t talk. He doesn’t call or text at all, even when she texts him. There’s no Killian at dinner. He always mysteriously disappears as soon as she walks in the doors at the station, and she idly wonders why he’s continuously working the night shift. He usually only does it twice a week, but he’s got to be working overtime every damn day. He’s obviously pissed at her, and she’s too stubborn to really, truly do something about it. Instead letting him stew by himself as she refuses to acknowledge that him avoiding her is killing her.

She cries more often than not when she’s awake late at night and can’t sleep, so maybe she does acknowledge that this is killing her.

She’s scared that she’s lost him for good, and he really is going to be the guy who sits across from her at weekly dinner (if he ever shows up again) who she acts like is nothing but a casual friend.

She doesn’t know what she’ll do if he acts the same way in return.

But she’s not going to change her work life just because he’s upset with her, and frankly she’s pissed as hell at him at this point, so when she needs to fill out the paperwork to make sure she gets paid for this asshole who managed to get a right hook on her before she got handcuffs on him, she still goes to her favorite precinct. She can already feel her eye swelling, the purple bruise coming to light against her pale skin, but it’s not a big deal. She’ll just put a bag of frozen peas on it when she gets home.

It’s as she’s getting ready to leave that it happens. He must not know that she’s in there tonight because all of the sudden she’s face to face with him for the first time in a month.

“Hi,” Emma squeaks, throat suddenly dry as she looks him in the eyes for the first time in what feels like forever. They’re that same blue, but they look almost hollow, like he hasn’t been sleeping. She hasn’t either.

“Bloody hell, Emma,” Killian scowls, reaching his hand up to touch the bruising under her eye like it’s instinct for him to touch her, to comfort her. “What happened? Are you alright, darling?”

Killian’s obviously forgotten that he’s mad at her, the term of endearment rolling off his tongue while the pad of his thumb brushes against her bruise, two kinds of tender mixing together.

“I’m fine,” she sighs, wanting to yell at him that it’s none of his business but not having the energy to even deal with this right now. She wants him to comfort her, even if she shouldn’t. “It’s not like it’s never happened before.”

“You need ice,” he snaps, softness suddenly melting away as he comes to his senses and backs away from her, hands moving to rest on his belt buckle.

“I know,” she sneers, slowly inching back from him. “I’m going home to get it.”

With those words, she walks out, not even bothering to look back.

She really wants to look back.

When she gets home later that night, the first thing she does is shimmy out of her dress and her heels, changing into a sweatshirt and pajama bottoms that make her look more like a twelve year old boy than anything else. But she doesn’t care. She’s just going to put that bag of frozen peas on her eye while she watches TV.

She must fall asleep, tonight and the past few nights catching up with her, because when she wakes up there’s a pounding at her door that has her running to her bedroom to grab her gun before approaching the door, the pounding calming into more of a gentle knock.

“Emma, love, open the door.” It’s Killian’s voice on the other side, and she immediately unloads her gun and puts it in the table drawer by her front door. She’s fucking pissed at him, but she’s not going to shoot him. That would be excessive even for her.

She flings the door open, only stopping it before it slams against her wall.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

He doesn’t answer her question. Instead moving in to cup her face, lips soft and warm and fullwhen they press against hers. He’s such a goddamn good kisser that he’s able to dissolve her into gooey mess within seconds, her head empty except for the thought of how wonderful this feels and the noises he makes when she slants her lips over his.

But then she remembers that she’s damn well pissed at him. He’s acted like she didn’t exist for an entire month, and now he’s in her apartment kissing her like he’s allowed to do that.

“What the fuck are you doing here, Killian?” she repeats, pushing against his chest and crossing her arms over her own chest.

“I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“You did that at the station, remember?” she huffs, anger at him heating to the boiling point. “And I don’t really think that sticking your tongue down someone’s throat is a way to make sure their black eye is okay.”

He’s running his hand through his hair, the black strands sticking up like a madman. “I’m sorry. It just seemed like the natural thing for me to do, and I had just missedyou. Seeing you hurt like that did something to me.”

“Yeah?” she asks sweetly, taking a step closer to him, their lips almost touching. She can hear the way he’s trying to regulate his breathing, the way he’s trying to keep himself under control.

“Yeah.”

“Then maybe,” she ghosts over his lips, “you shouldn’t have fucking ignored me for a month.”

She slaps him then, not in the face, though she had to resist the urge, but right across the shoulder where she knows he’s got a sensitive scar from a gunshot wound, where she used to kiss to greet him good morning or wish him goodnight. It’s cruel and it’s petty, but he doesn’t get to act like he can just kiss her and care about her after leaving her in his apartment and then avoiding her for weeks.

A grimace crosses his face that gives her some kind of sick sense of satisfaction.

“Well, hell, Emma,” he spits out, hand already reaching up to massage his shoulder. “You acted like you didn’t want me around last time I saw you, so why the fuck would it have mattered if I didn’t talk to you?”

“Where the hell did you get the idea that I didn’t want you around?”

“Maybe from the fact that every time I try to have a goddamn conversation about the two of us doing more than some kind of secret shameful sex you either close off from me or seduce me into shutting up.”

“That’s because you want to take something that’s just ‘secret shameful sex’ and turn it into a relationship when I’ve told you a million times that I don’t do relationships because I always get screwed over.”

“You’ve been in a fucking relationship with me for two years, and you don’t even realize it. Or maybe you do, and you won’t accept it. I don’t know what’s worse.”

“You and me,” she points between the two of them, “are not in a relationship.”

She’s lying, and she knows it. But she doesn’t care.

“When’s the last time you slept with someone other than me because I seem to recall having a conversation about how that wasn’t happening anymore?”

It’s amazing how even when he doesn’t yell, his voice still shoots to her very core, anger practically rolling off of him in waves as he controls his temper.

She’s got an answer on the tip of her tongue, but it never seems to pass through her lips. Instead she says, “Sex does not equate to a relationship, Killian.”

“No, but the fact that we spend almost every other night together, have meals together, talk every day, share about our days and our lives and our pasts does.”

“So what? You think that we should be in a relationship? You’re the guy who fucked me and then ignored me for a month. That doesn’t exactly seem like someone who wants that.”

His jaw ticks and his teeth clench. That’s Killian 101 for pissed. Good. At least he feels something.

“I didn’t want to keep doing what we were doing and have it go nowhere. I was pissed at you that night, but I was also pissed at myself. So I savored what I thought would be one last night with you because if you didn’t want anything more, I couldn’t just stay around as your play thing. I have fucking done that before, and I’m not doing it again. I most likely handled it wrong and handled tonight wrong, and I’m just bloody sorry, okay?” A sigh passes through his lips as his hand runs through his hair that makes it stick up in a way that has Emma feeling…things. “I once told you I’d do anything to keep the girl I like around, even if it kills me.Emma, it was killing me to be with you without reallybeing with you, and I didn’t know what to do so I left. I left because I was in pain, like my heart was physically breaking.”

He pauses again, and she can literally see the tension leave his shoulders as the anxiety rolls in instead, his hand moving to scratch behind his ear. That’s Killian 101 for nervous, and wow, she really does know him. She just didn’t know he was going to say that words he does next. “I love you, Emma. I love you more than anything in this whole goddamn world, but if you don’t want me, I have to respect that. I can’t fight for someone who doesn’t want me to fight for them.”

“Of course I want you,” she admits, anger cooling to the freezing point. He just told her he loves her, didn’t he? She heard that correctly, but she can’t quite believe it. They’ve got things to talk about, things to work through, but she doesn’t think she can do all of that right now. “I’m sorry, too. I know I fucked up with you. You deserve better than me. I just don’t know how to handle things like this. Like you and me. We’re like two fuses ready to blow, and I don’t want to be left as the carnage. I mean, look at us now. You just told me you love me for the first time after we were fighting.” Her voice lowers to a whisper. “I care about you too much to lose you.”

“Emma,” he pleads, taking a step closer to her, their faces just inches apart, “what about me and you makes you think we’re just going to blow up?”

Her breath hitches before she shrugs her shoulders, and she’s pathetic. “That’s how it’s always worked out for me before…and I, uh – I love you. I love you, and I don’t think I could survive without you. This last month has been awful, and everyone I’ve ever loved before has betrayed me.”

“I’m not going to do that.”

She knows that. She’s always known that, but she’s an idiot.

“I know.”

His face changes then, something softer with wide blue eyes and a smile that curves his lips just the slightest bit upward as he places his hand on her hip, squeezing it.

“You just have to take the leap, darling and trust that fighting for what both of us want is worth it.”

She does.

“Killian, please kiss me.”

He does.

It starts off slowly, just a simple press of his lips against hers, but even if emotionally it’s going to take her some time to come around to fully accepting these changes that are inevitably going to happen and that she wants him and doesn’t have to run away, her body knows that she wants him. And she wants him sooner rather than later.

A month without is a month too long.

She needs more, more of him, so she opens her mouth and gently presses her tongue against his lips asking for the entrance she knows they both want. Once her tongue enters his mouth, the slide of his tangling against hers, making them both whimper and groan in a way that has him digging his fingers into her back so that her hips can press against his.

The noise he makes then, something akin to a growl, well, she’s going to remember that forever.

Killian moves his hands from her back, one going to wrap around her ass while the other moves to cup her face, fingers planting themselves at the roots of her hair.

“Ow, shit.”

“Not the reaction I usually like from a woman when I’m trying to romance her.”

A soft laugh escapes from Emma’s lips before she presses her forehead against his, his breath still warm against her lips. “You can’t touch my face. The – the bruise, the swelling hurts.”

“Fuck, Swan, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. It’s fine. Just keep kissing me but avoid the eye, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

There’s no preamble before his tongue thrusts into her and his hands move to wrap just below her ass, fingers digging into the skin there as he’s lifting her up so that she can wrap her legs around his waist and begin rolling her hips. When he kisses her, she can’t think about anything else. It’s like the noises and the lights around them are muted and muffled and there’s nothing else but the feel of his lips against hers and their bodies melding together.

He’s moving her, but she doesn’t know where. He can’t touch her face, but she can touch his, so she runs her hands across his scruff – it’s longer now, and she fucking loves it – and into his hair, tugging at the soft strands so that Killian hums into her mouth and so that she can feel more of him, while he walks them to what she thinks is the couch.

When he settles down on what’s definitely the couch, he moves his lips to suck at her pulse point, and oh godshe really can’t think when he does that, but she has to move her legs out from underneath him or else she’ll never be able to walk again. He gets what she’s doing, lifting his hips so that she can straddle his lap, but when he lifts his hips they lightly brush against hers and fuckshe can feel his growing hardness against her thigh.

She missed him, but she also missed that.

She can’t take this not having her skin against his thing, so she reaches down to pull her sweatshirt off, the room suddenly too hot to have anything on her that’s not Killian.

His hands immediately go for her exposed waist, calloused fingers inching up her skin until he gently presses his hand against her breasts, palming them while she kisses across his jaw, only stopping when his thumbs run over her nipples, and she literally feels them go hard beneath his touch.

“I missed you, Killian,” she sighs against his neck as his fingers start to twist and pull and tease at her peaks. “I can’t ah fuck– ” She can’t even speak right now, her senses heightened at ever touch and every movement of their hips together, wetness pooling at her core, and she really, desperately needshim right now. She needs him so she pulls back from his neck and kisses him again before attempting to take off her pants, struggling because of the way Killian’s got a hold on her.

“You’re bloody amazing,” he moans as he finally helps her take off the rest of her clothes, slipping her pajama pants down her legs until she’s completely bared before him, his darkened gaze not helping the heat she’s feeling.

“Not to be cliché, but you’re wearing too many clothes.”

“Aye,” he confirms, reaching back to grab the material at the nape of his neck, pulling the material of the shirt up until his chest is exposed to her, the strong lines covered by the wiry dark hair that she didn’t realize she missed so damn much until she runs her fingers through it, feeling the beat of his heart in his chest.

Before she knows it he’s kicking his jeans across the floor, and she’s placing her knees on either side of his hips, teasing his smooth tip through the wetness of her folds. They don’t need much foreplay, the month of not seeing each other and the admission of love dissolving into an almost immediate need as soon as she sinks down onto him, moving her hips slightly to the side so that she knows he’ll hit her just right when she starts to move above him.

Oh God, right there.

“Fuck,” Killian hisses out, throwing his head back against the couch as she leans forward to quickly brush her lips against his, resting her forehead against his shoulder to just savor the moment because they haven’t even started and it’s almost too much.

She begins to move, using her thighs to help her move up before sliding back down, the way he drags inside of her making her want to cry out in relief. She must not be going fast enough, the friction not enough for him because he’s grabbing onto her hips and helping her move, thrusting his length up into her wet heat as she moves down.

“That’s a good girl,” he groans, letting her ride him in a way the she knows he loves. He’s so responsive to her, always giving her physical signals or encouraging words to keep her moving against him as their moans mix together and fill the room. “That’s mygood girl.”

Any verbal response she has to him is stuck in her throat, everything she has is focusing on trying to keep moving at the same pace while also being able to breathe. But she’s gasping for air, the way his length is moving inside of her makes it impossible for her to think let alone be conscious of what she’s doing, and her legs are basically a quivering mess at this point.

Killian must realize that she’s having a difficult time keeping up the pace, her entire body now a quivering mess at the pleasure of it, so in a much practiced move, he flips them so that her back is against the couch cushions and he’s hovering over her.

She clenches her muscle to keep him from slipping out, and Killian mutters a “bloody fuck” against her breasts, biting at her nipple in a way that has her muttering a similar “holy fuck” against his chest.

She’s close, but she’s not close enough, so when Killian angles his hips so that he brushes against her clit with every thrust, she thinks she might combust, little bursts of pleasure running through her and causing her vision to blur as he moves above her.

“Oh god,” she moans when he lifts her leg over his shoulder, the angle now absolutely perfect while he pumps inside of her, his body heat everywhere. “Right – right there. Don’t stop.”

Suddenly, she’s on the verge, wrapping her arms around his back and feeling his muscles strain as her nails dig into the skin to bring him closer. He’s fantastic at this. It feels so goddamn good, and how did they go an entire month without doing this?

Never again. Never again. Never again.

She can feel her body tense, the heat rising through her stomach, and with four more thrusts, she’s falling apart, the only sign of her orgasm is the pounding in her ears that must be reverberating throughout the entire apartment complex. Maybe even the damn parking lot.

The fluttering of her muscles around him must have pushed Killian over the edge because through the pounding in her ears and the pounding between her thighs she hears him groan out her name quickly followed by the hot feeling of him pulsing deep inside of her as his seed spills into her and he collapses on top of her, the weight totally and completely welcome.

“You’re amazing, Emma,” he presses kisses against her face, anywhere he can reach before lightly brushing his lips against the bruise that’s come into full effect. “Bloody amazing. I love you. I love you. I love you.”

He kisses that spot on her shoulder, and she whispers her love to him against his skin. “You’re not too bad yourself, detective,” she sighs, running her hands over the scratch marks on his back, a weird sense of satisfaction running through her over the fact that she put those there.

She can feel Killian softening inside of her, so he pulls out with a slight hiss, and she immediately feels empty even when he’s heading over to the kitchen and giving her a view of his ass as she tries to clench her legs together so his cum doesn’t get onto the couch. Luckily Killian is back with a warm washcloth and wiping her down in a move that’s not new but suddenly more gentle than usual.

When he’s pulling away she has to tug on his wrist so that his lips meet hers, just a chaste way to say thank you for simply being here. And, you know, the mind blowing sex.

“Killian?”

“Yes, my love?”

The corners of her lips tug up at the ‘my’ in front of the love as she reaches to caress his face. He looks happy. She’s happy. She hopes that he is, too.

“Can you put the peas on the coffee table back in the freezer and get me the other bag? As much as Ienjoyed that, my eye did not.”

Killian looks at her so tenderly, the black desire of his eyes from earlier fading into a much softer blue more similar to the ocean than anything else. “Did I hurt you?”

“Killian, no. That was fucking fantastic. We are never going that long without doing that again.”

“Oh yeah?” he questions, leaning down over her so that his lips are mere centimeters above hers, his breath intermingling with hers.

“Yeah,” she sighs, quickly capturing his bottom lip between hers, “I might even let you do it in public.”

“Swan,” Killian gasps, pulling back from her to put his hand over his heart, lips parted in surprise, “I didn’t know you were such an exhibitionist.”

He’s got a throw pillow in his face before she finds the words to respond to him. “I meant that you can kiss me in front of people…in front of David. In front of whoever the hell you want.”

Killian’s eyes light up, round saucers that make him look ten years younger because of how joyful he looks. It only lasts for a moment, though, before his features are schooled and he looks as if he could be doing his taxes. She’s confused, her head pounding a bit from her black eye, and doesn’t understand how he could switch between emotions that quickly.

“I was really looking forward to the exhibitionist thing, though.” He’s falsely pouting at her, the corners of his mouth ticking up just the slightest bit, seemingly without his permission. “Think about it, Swan. We could do it at the station, right there on my desk in the middle of the bullpen, possibly with handcuffs. Yours or mine. It doesn’t matter. Or maybe even at the grocery store…right next to the frozen peas you seem to love so much.”

At that, he walks out of the room, formerly frozen peas in hand on his way to get a new bag for her eye, and suddenly she’s got an image of the two of them going at it like animals next to the frozen food aisle in a Whole Foods.

Talk about filling a different kind of hole.

#frozen peas #cs cocktober #captain swan #cs fic #cs ff

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voidfishersong · 6 years ago

Text

Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance and Star Wars

I accidentally thought up an entire AU because I accidentally tagged an ike/soren post with ‘star wars’ because im stupid but NOW

Gawain was an exceptional Jedi Master who left the Order after The Thing happens (the Medallion is probably some Sith artifact)

Gawain’s padawan was Zelgius, who Fell and became Sith Lord Lehran’s apprentice

Elena was a Mandalorian, heir to a minor clan. They didn’t like a Jedi marrying her, but accepted her and her children

After Elena’s death, Greil, Ike, and Mist leave Mandalore since they are no longer welcome

They migrate to Naboo, ruled by Queen Crimea (Elincia)

Greil runs a group of bounty hunters

Titania is also former Jedi, and she’s an exceptional pilot (horsemanship skills are here translated into piloting). She wields a staff that has two blades of green lightsaber. the end result is like. really long

Ike isn’t Force sensitive, but Mist is

Ike and all the other kids know that Titania was a Jedi, but not that Greil was

Soren is extremely strong with the Force but was never trained and therefore doesn’t have a lightsaber until late in the story

When Greil is killed by Zelgius, in a fight that’s the first time Ike ever saw his father use the Force or a lightsaber, Ike takes up his father’s blue blade and begins to train

(Non Force sensitive kid in Mandalorian armor wielding a lightsaber is a rad image in my head)

The Goldoans are a clan of Grey Jedi (leaning Dark thanks to Dheginsea)

Titania is a red twi’lek. Shinon’s probably a weequay. Rhys is ???? but not human definitely. Maybe also a twi’lek?

Reyson is a Dark Jedi who will eventually become more Grey Jedi. He works for Tibarn, who is a pirate lord who basically runs several planets and controls most major shipping routes, including the Kessel Run. Reyson is ex-Jedi but left after his entire group of padawans were killed

Reyson can’t hold a lightsaber because of chronic illness (he was born with it), but damned if he isn’t strong with the Force. he really likes using Force Lightning even though it hurts him too. Tibarn doesn’t like it

Naesala is a Dark Jedi pirate, but he rarely uses the Force so most people don’t know his power

The Gallians are another pirate group, but far more legal. Or at least, they disguise themselves as legal, thanks to Ranulf’s insane negotiation skills

Ranulf is slightly Force sensitive, though he’d never admit it. People find him uncanny but no one really suspects except, like, Zelgius

Lethe hates Ranulf telling her she has to work with Mandalorians AND Jedi

Greil was well-connected to the Gallian pirate gang back when he first married Elena

Shinon claims the Force doesn’t exist. He watches Titania jump forty feet into the air, but the Force doesn’t exist. Soren levitates an entire building. What’s the Force lmao it’s just made up bullshit

Sephiran is the Supreme Chancellor. Sanaki, padawan to the Head of the Order Tanith, is supposedly his granddaughter, and is definitely his ward

Sanaki is barely Force sensitive, far less than she should be, but Tanith trains her nonetheless. She becomes incredible at wielding dual lightsabers. Eventually, she’ll get Altena’s legendary golden sabers

The Black Knight is a mysterious masked Sith who teleports using warp powder, thanks to the Sith Alchemy of his Master. No one knows this Apprentice is the same man as Zelgius, bodyguard (and lover) to Chancellor Sephiran

(Ranulf, at some point: “hey y’all did realize the chancellor is a sith, right? yeah just making sure”

Everyone else: “wHAT”)

Micaiah is incredibly strong in the Force but untrained

Lehran keeps trying to recruit Soren as his Apprentice but Soren is like “not five minutes ago you said you’re planning to blow up Mandalore with my boyfriend on it so I really don’t see why I would join you”

Ashnard decided his son “wasn’t strong enough in the Force” (Ashnard isn’t Force sensitive so idk how he thinks he knows that but it’s Ashnard so...) and left him to die. Then shit happens like in FE canon but when Soren comes looking for Ike, Greil recognizes the child’s incredible Force presence and recruits/adopts him. He becomes like Titania (and Greil)’s padawan; Titania handles all the Force education because Greil is Not A Jedi

Soren’s ‘saber is eventually silver, because cool shit

Oscar was a Nubian soldier before leaving, and Kieran is still one of Elincia’s knights

Rolf is probably Force-sensitive because the image of Shinon’s sniper protegee being Force sensitive is the funniest thing ever

The Jedi are basically the Begnion pegasus knights, but plus a lot of other people. But like all the Councilors and shit are from the pegasus knights

Ashnard is the crazy guy who fulfills a role similar to the Separatists but with less negotiation and more just straight up murdering people who don’t join him. His Riders/Generals are all Force users: Tauroneo is an ex Jedi Councilor, Petrine was never a Jedi, and I forget the fourth Rider of Daein so...

Petrine’s ‘saber is a long staff with one blade. Her and Titania have multiple badass fights: one in the air, like the ace pilots they are, and then when they crash, they have a staffsaber fight too. Petrine is a togruta

Sothe is basically Ezra but not Force sensitive. He’s a street rat from Lothal probably

Nailah is a chief of a Tusken Raider tribe because she’s badass like that. Rafiel was a Jedi presumed dead after a mission to Tatooine went wrong, but Nailah found him and then just told her tribe that he’s her husband now and they don’t care. Rafiel was severely injured so he can barely move without assistance and also struggles to access the Force because reasons idk

After everything is settled, Soren takes Priam as his padawan and begins a New Jedi Order. how does Priam exist? he’s related to Ike and Soren, because the Force. I love the SW universe, you can just say ‘the Force’ as an answer to why any impossible shit can happen

Sephiran truly believes he’s a servant of the Force and that to have order you must have chaos and death first and Ike is just like buddy,,, I do not have anything to do with the Force and that’s. not what it wants

I really, really, really, really want art of Ike in beskar’gam with a lightsaber though

#in an AU of this AU Soren is found by Zelgius instead and taken on as Zelgius's secret Sith Apprentice #other AUs have the characters as the same roles but with different plot that varies from POR's plot way more than this AU #most of those are like..... Soren is an actual Jedi or w/e #fire emblem #star wars #fe: por #fe aus #other AUs are: Ranulf is an actual Jedi but like Quinlan where he's just like lmaooooo no #Ike has Jedi boyfriends regardless #this takes place back in ye olden days when Jedi were actually allowed attachments tho #so like Gawain wasn't kicked out or anything he just eventually.... left #maybe in a more divergent-from-FE au there are other Sith Lords who are more typical just murder shit #and Sephiran is just Exhausted

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goodgodbean · 7 years ago

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Written On This Skin - Soulmate! Luke Hemmings

A/N - Hey! This is a complete version of my series of Written on this skin, which was a 13 part series. This is 13,447 words. I’m sorry for those who don’t want to read this and have to endure endless scrolling.

Masterlist

+++

“‘History test - Tuesday, Psych hw pages 120-124’, and oh look ‘coffee with Tom 5pm.’ Its like she forgets she has a Soulmate!” Luke wines to his bandmate, Ashton. Ashton was the only one left who would listen to his nagging about a soulmate.

Once your soulmate is born, whatever you write on your skin will appear on their’s. With the annoying exception of specific locations and full names. Luke particularly didn't like that rule, because whenever he tried to write to his soulmate he could never put his full name down.

Trying to communicate with your soulmate through writing is very common, and most of the time people find loopholes to the system, song lyrics for example. But Luke’s soulmate was not having it. She wouldn't respond to anything he wrote. Instead just putting little notes for herself on her body. It drove Luke crazy, looking at all these little notes about her life, but not being able to be there with her.

“Ashton, I’m never going to find her,” Luke whines. Ashton shakes his head, “Maybe its not a her” He says with a smirk

Luke groans at Ashton’s antics. “Let me check…. Yeah I’m positive its a her.” Luke snaps back, causing Ashton to laugh. “I just wish i could be like… Hey its me Luke Hemmings and then like meet her at a concert or something,” Luke dreams

“You’re so lazy.” Ashton accused. “It should be more natural than that. ‘Hey Im Luke Hemmings come find me’” Ashton says, mocking the boy next to him.

“But that’s exactly what you did. You told Emily that you were the drummer in 5 seconds of summer, and you met at a concert” Luke accused back at the drummer.

“So? You can’t just take our story” Emily says coming into the room. The rest of the boys from 5sos had already found their soulmates, Luke is the last one still stuck wondering. Luke liked the rest of the girls, they were down to earth and they are all fans of 5sos previously.

“Hey, Em, How should I get my soulmates attention?” Luke asks the girl, who sat down next to Ash. It’s common to have the girls on tour with them since after a few days of not seeing your soulmate, you will get ill or be in physical pain. Emily contemplates the question for a second before saying, “Have you tried to write her some song lyrics?” “You mean like Michael and Jackie?” Luke asks, trying to remember their soul story.

“Damn, I forgot about that!” Emily yells, causing a scolding from Ash for swearing. “I don't know, do what feels right”

“What feels right right now is to call her out on stage,” Luke mutters, but Ashton and Emily hear him.

“Do what?”

“Thats a bad idea” Emily and Ashton say this at the same time, causing them to look at each other and smile. Then they are back to serious-problem-solving-couple.

“Have you never read a fanfic?” Emily asks, her eyes wide.

“Not really,” Luke answers scratching the back of his neck.

“Well, I’ll tell you how this ends. Thousands of girls are going to claim to be your soulmate, and then you are going to actually think one of them is, and then one day your going to discover that they aren't and you and your soulmate are going to be heartbroken. Trust me Luke. Let fate do its thing.” Emily explains to Luke. Luke doesn't have a comeback this time.

He stares angrily at his skin.

Y/N stares angrily at her skin.

She wishes she was clever enough to come up with song lyrics to tell him where she was and maybe who she is. When Y/N was younger she claimed that she wanted her soulmate to come naturally. No loopholes, no nothing. So here she was stuck writing stupid notes on her hand, so he at least knows she exists. He used to write back, with clever lyrics. It killed her to not respond.

Y/N gets a text on her phone suddenly. It’s her best friend. She had been blabbering on about a concert in a couple days that she couldn't get tickets to. You were a fan of the band but not a huge fan. She just texted you that she won some tickets. You decide to write a quick note on your arm about the concert

Luke is surprised when he sees whats written on his arm now.

“Guys look!” He yells, calling his bandmates and their girlfriends over. They all ooh and ahh at the ink on his arm.

+++

“5sos Thurs. 5pm” was written on Luke’s arm. He couldn't be happier. He was going to meet his soulmate in two days. His heart hasn't stopped beating wildly for the past hour when the note showed up. Maybe this is her way of communicating? Maybe she wanted him to come… well jokes on her he’s performing.

“How am i going to find her though?” Luke asks the group… again. When the news spread among the band that she was going to be at the concert everyone was excited and jumping around. Now, an hour later, everyone has dulled a little, well except for Luke.

This will complete everything that Luke has ever wanted. Luke wanted to be in a good band with his best mates, check. Luke wants a soulmate to share his success with. He wants someone who he can bring along on tour with him and will enjoy it. Luke wants to give someone the world.

“Should I write back?” Luke asks his friends. They all perk up at the new proposition.

“Um Fuck yeah!” Yells Emily, Ashton’s soulmate.

“Don’t fucking swear” Ashton scolds, just as he did to the band in the early days.

“I don’t care… Im punk rock!” Emily yells, stealing Michaels infamous line. She throws her hands into the air. Ashton takes the chance to squeeze her sides making her giggle like a little girl. Luke watches this all go down, excited that one day soon he will have that. He will have a girl that he can tease, and love. And she will love him back too.

“Hey thats my line!” Michael yells playfully.

Luke turns to the rest of the group, “What do you think?” Everyone nods in agreement with Emily. Luke is practically jumping in his seat now. “what should i write?”

“Something mysterious,” Says Jackie, Michael’s soulmate. She pops a can of soda open and take a huge gulp. Michael reaches to the bottom of the can and pretends to lift up. The rest of the group laughs at what could’ve happened if Michael decided to shove the can.

“How about something simple, like hey ima be there too,” Calum proposes, being sensible for once. Luke nods along to the idea.

“How about a little of both? Mysterious yet simple?” Emily proposes. She grabs Jackie’s can of soda and takes a big swig out of it, causing Jackie to yell, “hey!”

Luke leans over and places his arm on the Desk in the Hotel room. Everybody crowds around awaiting what he is about to write.

He places the pen down on his arm and begins to write.

She places the pen down on the paper and begins to write.

Essays for this and Essays for that. There is always so much work to be done. It’s while Y/N is doing her work her arm begins to tickle. She looks down to see words appearing onto her arm after so long. “I’ll be looking out into the crowed for you” What the hell does that mean? He’ll be looking out into the crowed? You look at the other things you’ve written on your arm as if it’ll give you an explanation. You finally spot something that may be of help. “5sos Thurs. 5pm” Was he talking about that concert?

You faintly remember that all the boys had their soulmates, but to check you look it up. Luke Hemmings. He was the only one who didn’t have a soulmate. Then you think its ridiculous and look up the opening act, Hey Violet. The two boys in the band had already found their soulmates, and you were pretty sure you weren't into girls.

So you were left with Luke Hemmings. Lead singer. Loved by many. It was a split second decision. You know it was going against your promise, but you had to write back.

“‘Lead Singer?’ guys! she wrote back!” Luke yelled, even though his friends were only a few feet away. Everybody quickly starts to ask him what it says.

“She asked if i was the lead singer!” Luke yells, he grabs a marker and writes back.

“Yes” Was the immediate response Y/N got. Her breath hitches.

“Two days” Is what Luke got in return. He would see his soulmate in two days.

+++

It seemed to good to be true. The radio station had given Y/N and Alyssa (your friend who won the tickets), backstage passes too. She was going to be able to see him before the show. He was going to know who Y/N was, in just a couple of hours.

This is when it begun.

First It was the curling iron. Alyssa’s hair just has to be curled, because if Michael saw her, there was no way she would have strait hair. So Y/N had to go to the store to get a curling iron, but only a specific type of curling iron. It had to be one with a ceramic iron. So Y/N got the correct curling iron after driving to about three stores to find it. Then once Alyssa’s hair is properly curled, you were off.

Second, you had started about an hour later than you planned, but you were scheduled to get there on time, well if it weren't for the traffic. When you think of traffic you think of plenty of cars on the road, but you were moving. Even if it was just a little. This was stand-still traffic. It would take you an hour to get there without traffic, but now it had taken five.

Y/N missed the concert. She missed the concert by a long shot. I they wouldn't even let the girls into the venue, since there was only about ten minutes left when they got there.

It killed Y/N to miss it. Not just miss the Meet & Greet, but the whole concert.

Luke had kept on putting little cute notes on his arm. They were small things like “I can’t wait to see you” or “I will always find you in a crowed” and the ever so famous words that Michael wrote on his arm, “Hey you got a bangin’ body” in which Luke wrote under “from Michael”

Luke assumed that when he got on stage, that he would get a feeling, or his eyes would meet her’s. Or any of the cliche’s that Emily, Ashton’s soulmate, was feeding him. But there was nothing. There was no feeling, no eye contact, and no explanation written on his skin.

When they all got off stage the first time, the boys all looked at Luke for an explanation. They were all prepared to stop in the middle of any song, just incase he found her. Luke never stopped though. He never stopped a song, and he never stopped looking for her.

“Did you see her?” Michael asks, bouncing on his toes.

“Nothing. I didn't see her. I didn't even feel like she was there!” Luke cried out. “Maybe its some joke that she's playing on me?” Luke wonders

“Thats a sick joke, if she is” Ashton says, and the other boys agree with him.

“C’mon we gotta go back onstage,” Luke says and they all run out again.

When the boys go back to the dressing room, the girls were waiting for them. Emily, Ashton’s soulmate comes running and jumps on Luke, causing Ashton to give out a little whine, “She’s my soulmate”

“Where is she? Where?” Emily says, bouncing around, trying to get a good look over Luke’s shoulder.

“She wasn’t out there,” Luke says gruffly, causing the whole room to still. The girls were very excited to meet the last person in their own foursome. The girls Emily, Jackie (Michaels soulmate), and Alex (Calum’s soulmate), all became very close with each other on tour. Although there always felt like something was missing in the small group of girls, they always assumed that it was because Luke’s soulmate wasn't there.

“What?” Emily says in complete surprise

“She wasn't out there,” Luke repeats pushing past the girls and flopping down on one of the couches. He looks down at his arm again, hoping that she would give him some type of explanation to why she just ditched him.

Its about an hour or so later when they leave the stadium to go to their hotel rooms. The stadium is empty, just like Luke’s heart. They ride up in the elevator, and break apart to go to their respective hotel rooms. Once again, Luke was left with a single king bed in his room, and nobody to share it with. He sits down and contemplates what could’ve happened tonight… if only she showed up!

Michael bursts into Luke’s room. “We’re getting McDonalds, wanna come?” He asks

‘No’ was ready on the edge of Lukes lips, but he just couldn't push it out. Instead he nods and goes with the blond boy.

“Lets go to McDonalds!” Y/N begs her friend, Alyssa.

“Why?”

“I’m hungry!” It was a lie. She wasn't hungry. She just didn't want to leave yet. Her soulmate was only going to be in this area for today and tomorrow, and she already wasted today. Y/N just wanted to stay in the area in hopes to see him. She didn’t write anything on her arm to tell him. What would she say? ‘hey sorry there was traffic?’ Pathetic. Alyssa didn't know to boot. How were you supposed to tell your best friend, “hey the guy your crushing on? In that band? Yeah he’s my soulmate”. Yeah, that wouldn't go over well. Alyssa would probably use it to boost her Twitter fame or message Luke. Y/N and Alyssa were sitting in a booth near the door when Alyssa spots them.

“Omg, Oh my lord, Its them!” She stage whispers to Y/N.

“Who?” Y/N asks turning in her seat. Alyssa reaches out and snags Y/N’s arm, pulling her back down into her seat.

“Don’t look!” Alyssa says like its the most obvious thing in the world. “Its Five Seconds of Summer!” She says with a little yelp and giggle. “And their soulmates,” Alyssa adds on darkly. Alyssa would like to say that the fandom liked the soulmates, and they totally do! But everyone in the fandom can’t help but be a little salty that they weren't 5sos’s soulmates. Luke is still up for grabs though. Nobody knows who his soulmate could be.

“I’m going to go talk to them” Y/N announces to Alyssa, about to stand up.

“What? are you crazy? You gotta play it cool!” Alyssa insist, standing up herself. Y/N lets out a little laugh at the memory of Alyssa’s last ‘playing it cool’ act.

Y/N leans back in her side of the booth. “go ahead, i’l watch from here!” Y/N says, just as Luke spots her.

+++

Luke couldn't breath. That was her, sitting in the booth, just across the McDonalds. He could take three steps (five for a regular sized person) and he would be in reaching distance with his soulmate. His heart couldn't take it. He takes a step towards her.

Luke’s friends looks at him with curiosity. Wondering why he was looking at some girl in the middle of a McDonalds like she was his hope.

Then it hit Emily, Ashton’s soulmate, like a ton of bricks, “Guys! Do you think that’s her?” Emily stage whispers to the rest. Everyone gives suspicious nods.

Then Luke bumps into Alyssa.

Y/N watches Luke and Alyssa from the booth. “Excuse me,” Luke says, trying to be polite, his attention was on the girl in the booth. He tries to step around Alyssa. Alyssa moves to block his way again.

“Oh! I am just so sorry!” Alyssa says. Y/N watches as she pretends to drop something and proceeds to stick her butt in Luke’s face. Y/N silently giggles from her seat a few feet away. Alyssa was not the smoothest person… like ever. Y/N stands slightly to get a better angle

Then Y/N makes eye contact with Luke. The whole world stopped. His eyes were as blue as the liquid they use in pad commercials. His dirty blonde hair flopped down across his forehead. He licked his lips, darkening the shade slightly.

Then Luke makes eye contact with her. The whole world stopped. Her hair, her clothes, she just looks perfect. You could say she looks so perfect standing there.

Y/N watches from a distance, although every inch of her body wanted to go to her soulmate. As much as she wants to actually meet Luke, Y/N also wanted to see what Alyssa would do next. A good friend would save her form embarrassment, a best friend would watch… then help. “Sorry!” Alyssa says again as Luke tries to move around her again and she blocks him… again. “Such a klutz!” She yells.

“Oh my lord! Move bitch!” The girl holding hands with Ashton yells. Her name is Emily if Y/N could remember it correctly. Alyssa looks taken aback and Y/N thinks this is a good time to say something.

“Hey! Don’t talk to my best friend like that!” Y/N yells back, moving out of the booth. Then she adds in a stage whisper, “bitch.” Emily gasps, tugging her hand out of Ashton’s.

“You want to go right now?” Emily yells, and Ashton places a hand on Emily’s shoulder. Y/N wasn’t sure if it was for reassurance or to hold her back, if necessary. Y/N is not one to back down from a fight, but now way was she a fighter herself. Luke looks at Y/N with wide eyes.

“You just insulted my best friend! Of course I’ll fight you!” Y/N screams. Everybody in the McDonalds is looking at them now. The employees were frozen in place, watching, but unsure of what to do. Do they call the cops? There wasn’t a fight… at least not yet. “Stop it!” Luke abruptly yells. It causes the two girls to shut up for a moment, giving Luke their attention. Luke turns to Emily, “Please shut up, she’s my soulmate!” He says in a stage whisper, hoping to sway her. Emily grumbles a little, but keeps her mouth shut. Then Luke does something nobody was expecting. He takes the last two steps between Y/N and him and wraps Y/N in his arms.

It’s like coming home, Y/N decides. Y/N never really had a home, she moved a lot and her parents were a nightmare. Luke, he felt warm, like baking cookies in the oven or talking to a best friend. He smelled of sweat, but Y/N didn’t mind.

It took a minute, but Luke finally breaks apart from her. It felt to Y/N as if she is suddenly missing something. She is missing his warmth.

“I thought you said you were going to be at the concert,” Luke says, cupping Y/N’s face in his hands.

“There was traffic, and a curling iron mishap,” Y/N begins to explain when suddenly she heard a screech. Y/N quickly pulls away from Luke to face her best friend, Alyssa.

“YOU KNEW!” Alyssa yells so loud that the restaurant shakes a little. “How long?” Alyssa demands.

“A few days,” Y/N says shyly.

“A FEW DAYS?” Alyssa yells again, in disbelief. “You didn’t tell me for a few days? I thought we told each other everything!” Alyssa yells, broken hearted.

“How was i supposed to tell you?” Y/N says despretly, she looks around at the restaurant for an answer. Y/N notices a few phones pulled out and pointed, no doubtedly on the camera app. “Let’s not do this here, Alyssa,” Y/N begs.

“You didn't tell me about Tom, you didn't tell me about the trip to Paris, and now this? Are we even friends?”

“Alyssa..”

“You went on that trip and didn't tell me! You were gone for days, and you wouldn't pick up your phone!” Alyssa yells. Y/N had really messed up this time. Y/N, over the past few years had a streak with Alyssa of not telling her what was going on in her life, breaking their first and vital rule as best friends: tell each other everything.

Tears were streaming down Y/N’s face now, Luke reaches over to wipe them away, but Y/N instinctively swats his hand away. “I said I was sorry! I’m sorry I didn’t tell you! I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Luke!”

“Sorry isn't enough this time! I hope you have fun with your new friends.” With that Alyssa storms out.

Y/N was out of words. What just happened? One second she was defending her friend, then she met her soulmate? Then she gets into a fight with her friend? Y/N is left in the middle of McDonalds looking around for her own answer. Emily opens her mouth to speak, but Ashton quickly puts a hand over it, silencing whatever she was about to say.

Y/N turns to Luke, knowing what she had to do next. “I have to go after her,” Y/N says, as the only explanation. Then Y/N ran out into the warm summer night after her friend.

Luke was left in a McDonalds, phones pointed at him, his friends staring, and with absolutely nothing. He has nothing of her, not even a name. He didn't have a phone number. He didn't have a picture. The only thing he had was a memory.

+++

Y/N runs out of the restaurant. Her head is still spinning. It seemed like everything was going okay and then it all turned on the head. She still couldn’t really grasp what happened. All Y/N knows now is that she needs to find her best friend. Y/N’s head is on a swivel, looking left and right.

Y/N lets out a small breath of relief, when she spots Alyssa’s tight ringlets. Y/N rushes over to the girl, wrapping her arms around her body.

“Alyssa…” Y/N says.

“What?” Alyssa snaps, wriggling out of Y/N’s hold and snapping around to look at her.

“I’m sorry.”

“You always say that! And I always forgive you! Y/N… this was your soulmate. All I wanted was to be excited for you and experience it with you! Instead you ignore me!” Alyssa yells, grabbing tightly onto Y/N’s arms, trying to get her point across.

“I’m sorry! I was just so worried about what you might say or do, if I told you he was Luke Hemmings.” You try to explain, “I was worried you might try something or I don’t know,”

“You do know though,” Alyssa accused correctly.

“Yeah. I was worried that you would be jealous and try to use me to get to my soulmate,” You admit, worried what she might say.

“I’m a friend first, Y/N. I’m a fangirl second,” Alyssa says. And thats all you need to embrace each other again. “I still don't forgive you about the Paris thing though,” Alyssa says, surprising Y/N, “But I will forget,” Alyssa ends, causing both girls to laugh for a second.

They only laughed for a second, because then Alyssa’s big clunky purse was stolen. The girls glance at each other for a moment before running after the criminal. The girls were both in track, and although the guy was fast, the girls had technique to fall back onto. When reaching the guy, Y/N jumps onto his back, bringing him down, due to his unsteadiness. Alyssa reaches the thief second, she grabs her purse and proceeds to kick the man on his side. Y/N stands up herself and proceeds to do the same.

So thats how the three of them, a robber, Alyssa, and Y/N ended up in the back of a cop car. The girls were in there for Public Assault, while the robber for, well, robbing. The girls look at each other and gives out a silent giggle. This is one hell of a night.

This is one hell of a night, Luke thought. He and the rest of the band decide to get food and wait, hopefully Luke’s soulmate would come back. Luke thinks over his night. His soulmate missed his concert, but he found her in a McDonalds, picking a fight with Emily (Ashton’s soulmate). Then once Luke gets Emily to shut up, her friend… Alyssa was it? She starts yelling at his soulmate. Then Alyssa storms out, causing Y/N to leave only saying, “I have to go after her.” So yeah, it’s been one hell of a night for Luke.

It was about and hour or so later, since they finished their meal, and still no sign of Luke’s soulmate. Luke finds himself tapping to an unknown beat, and ignoring his friends conversation. All Luke can do is stare at he door, hoping that his mysterious soulmate would appear. Its another hour later when Alex, Calum’s soulmate suggests that they go back to the hotel. “No” was Luke’s first response.

“She might go to the Hotel,” Alex tries to rationalize.

“No, I’m sure she’ll come here,” Luke demands. The rest of the group nods a little, but Alex continues to push.

“How about some of us go to the hotel, just incase?” Alex says. Luke suspects that she is just tired. Of all the girls, Luke has spend the least time with Alex. So there is not much allegiance between the two of them. A wave of anger washes over Luke, didn’t Alex realize how important this is? She had already found her soulmate, but Luke is left empty. Didn’t she remember when she first met Calum? Didn’t she remember the best day of her life? Didn't she realize that the best day of his life was just pulled out from under Luke’s feet?

“She has a point,” Calum says after a few beats of nothing. Luke nods, understanding. If his soulmate was here he would back her up no matter what happened. “Me and Alex will go back,” Calum says, standing with Alex. They are about to walk away from the table when Luke speaks.

“Please just stay in the Lobby? Just incase?” Luke asks of his friend. Luke knows that plenty of fans know where they're staying, and so one girl, claiming to be Luke’s soulmate would not be let through. Even if she was the real thing. Calum gives Luke a subtle nod and they leave.

Luke places his head in his hands. Its been three hours since they finished their food. He could tell that everybody just wanted to go back to the hotel. They stayed for Luke though.

“Luke,” Ashton says, breaking the silence. The noise of talking died out about a half hour ago. Now all was left was little comments. “Luke, look at my phone,” Ashton passes his phone over to his friend. Then there she was. Luke lifts the phone, gently into his hands. On the phone is a video that was posted to twitter of Luke’s soulmate shouting at Emily, Luke hugging her, and then Alyssa shouting at his soulmate. The caption on the tweet, “Luke’s soulmate?” There wasn't a clear picture of her, her back faced towards the camera. But Luke would know her anywhere.

Luke looks up for the first time in a while. Hope is written on Ashton’s and Emily’s eyes. reassurance was in Mikey’s eyes, and Jackie (Michael’s soulmate) is sleeping on Michael’s shoulder. Although Calum and Alex wasn't here, he knew that they would be in the lobby, waiting for her to show up. All Luke could think about is how lucky he is to have these friends. That and he understands why she had to leave.

“Um, I’m sorry but you have to leave,” An employee says, sneaking up on the group. They collectively jump. They give him a dumb look. “It’s midnight, and we need to close,” He says as an explanation.

So they all stood, Mikey woke up Jackie, and they left. All Luke could think, is why didn't she come back?

+++

It’s the Morning when Y/N and Alyssa are released from the Police station. They had a court date in hand, and they were free to go. Alyssa has her phone whipped out in her had as Y/N calls a taxi.

“Did you find it yet?” Y/N asks anxiously. She tries to peer over at Alyssa’s phone, but Alyssa expertly moves it away.

“I’m trying, I’m trying!” Alyssa yells as the taxi pulled up. “Got it!” Alyssa yells, stepping into the taxi. Alyssa gives and Address to the driver and they are off.

When they arrive, there is a crowed of girls bunched at the door. They scream for Calum and his soulmate Alex. Y/N and Alyssa push through the crowed, (not easily, mind you) and they reach the door where there is a body guard posted. Y/N pushes past Alyssa to talk to the guard.

He beats her to the punch though, “May I see your keycard miss?” He asks, focusing his attention to Y/N.

“I don’t have one,” Y/N says, and is about to continue when he cuts her off.

“No keycard, no entry, sorry,” He says, not sounding sorry at all.

“Please let me in, Luke’s my soulmate,” Y/N begs, knowing that this is her only way in.

“Hah,” The body guard gives out a half-laugh, “That’s what they all say!” With that he dismisses the girls.

Y/N and Alyssa take a look at each other, before starting to scream with the rest of the girls. They yelled for Calum and Alex, who was standing in the Lobby of the hotel talking, and occasionally looking out into the crowed.

Then Calum spots her. It’s the girl that Luke claims to be his soulmate. She showed up. “Oh my god!” Calum says, rushing to the door. Alex, Calum’s soulmate, looks at him in curiosity. Calum turns around, “Thats her right?” Calum asks and Alex gives him an encouraging nod.

Calum saw her, they were in. The girls stood inside of the hotel lobby, looking at Calum and Alex. “So you’re Luke’s soulmate?” Calum asks Y/N. She nods, “Cool what’s your name?”

“Y/N” She responds. After a few beats of silence, she talks again, “Where is Luke?”

Luke slept in the Lobby last night, in hopes that she would show up at the hotel. Then, in the morning when she didn’t show, he left for the McDonalds with Emily, Ashton, Jackie, and Michael. They left Calum and Alex back at the Hotel just incase she went there. The fans had all had found her twitter account, after seeing the video of her, and so the boys followed her. His soulmate wasn't following the boy’s twitter though so they couldn’t DM her.

Luke’s leg begins to vibrate, causing Luke to whip out his phone to look at the caller ID. Once he sees the name on the screen, he quickly picks it up.

“Calum? Whats going on? Did you find her?” His questions come out all at once. Spilling from his mouth like truths. Ashton, Emily, Jackie, and Michael’s eyes were quickly on the boy. They look at him with interest, ready to hear what Calum has to say.

“Um, It’s not Calum,” Says a female voice over the phone. Her voice sounds angelic. Like an orchestra playing. Luke knows immediately who it is, sitting up straighter, he prepares himself for the conversation at hand.

“Yeah?” Luke asks to fill the silence.

“Yeah, It’s Y/N,” She says. Luke silently mouthes the name, testing it on his lips. “um your soulmate?” She adds on, to jog his memory.

“I’ll be at the Hotel in five minutes,” Luke says standing up, causing the rest of the group to stand also.

“Okay,” She says and Luke hangs up the phone. He could talk to her all day, but he’d rather talk to her in person. Luke bursts through the McDonalds door and start running. The rest of his friends start sprinting behind him, calling his name occasionally. All Luke could think about is getting to the Hotel. When outside the Hotel, Luke and the rest are bombarded. Luke continues to push his way through the crowed, forgetting manners. When Luke reaches the door, the body guard immediately recognizes him and opens the door. Luke mumbles out a quick thanks, but then he sees her.

“Oh my god,” Luke whispers running to Y/N and wrapping her in a hug. He pulls her head to his chest and cradles her there. He can’t believe he found her; his soulmate. She breaths out, and takes a deep breath of his scent. He smelt like McDonalds and sweat, but she knew that she would grow to love it. It’s a minute or so before Y/N speaks.

“Luke-“ She begins to say, trying to pull away.

“Let’s talk upstairs?” Luke quickly asks. Y/N nods along to his idea, and the nine of them travel to the Elevator and to Luke’s room.

Luke, and Y/N sit on the bed, next to each other and Luke catches Y/N’s hand in his own; causing red to spread across Y/N’s cheeks. Alyssa stays standing next to Y/N. Michael sits on a chair next to the bed and Jackie sits on his lap. Emily and Alex sit on the bed next to Luke.

“So who the hell are you?” Emily asks, nodding her head to Alyssa. Y/N is prepared to jump up and defend her best friend, but with a sharp tug on her arm by Luke she says sitting.

“She’s my best friend, I thought I made that clear,” Y/N growls. Her guard is up, and she is ready to jump up incase of another attack on her friend.

“Y/N calm down,” Alyssa says, her stance also defensive.

“She shouldn't talk to you, or anyone that way!” Y/N says. Emily herself looks like she is ready to fight.

“Don’t tell me what to do!” Emily yells, defending herself.

Alyssa and Y/N ignore her this time. Their eyes meet and they both silently agree that she isn't worth their time. “Luke what are we going to do?” Y/N ask her soulmate.

“What do you mean?” Luke asks genuinely curious.

“I mean, what are we going to do about being apart? If we’re apart for too long we’ll get sick” Y/N says

“Simple, you come on tour with us,” Luke easily proposes. He doesn’t see why this is so much of an issue. The other girls did it.

“I can’t come on tour with you,” Y/N says, and the whole room freezes.

+++

There is a collective breath in the room before it starts.

“What?” “Why?”

“What do you mean can’t come on tour?”

The boys and their girl’s shouted these things at Y/N making her want to curl up in a ball and leave. It was true though, she couldn't go on tour. She is in the middle of Finals Week in her last year of College. There is no way she's giving up her dream for her Soulmate. Y/N has always wanted more. Everybody else seems content just having a soulmate, but Y/N wants a life. A life outside of her relationship.

“I mean, I can’t come on tour. At least not for a few days. Its finals week,” Y/N says, looking directly at Luke.

The shouting starts. They boys yell to screw school and that her soulmate is more important than an education. Their girls start off at the boys side, but slowly start to side with Y/N and Alyssa. The girls draw upon their own lives and what they gave up to be with the boys.

“I was going to be a doctor!”

“So your job is more ‘important’ than my dream job?”

“I may not have had a plan, but I didn’t need you,”

These are all quotes from the girls yelling at the boys. The boys, excluding Luke, yell back their own small comments, but what could they say? The girls did give up their lives to be on tour with the boys. Sure they seems to enjoy it, but they always had other dreams outside of the boys and their dreams.

“What should we do?” Luke whispers to Y/N. The yelling of the girls and boys continue in the background, but neither Y/N nor Luke is worried about them. They’re soulmates, they’ll work it out. They have to. It’s written into their genes.

“I have to finish Finals. I’ll come to wherever you are in like four days?” Y/N asks. She had been thinking about this for hours now. She couldn't ask Luke to leave the band for her, so he can’t ask her to leave her life to go to him. “Okay,” Luke says agreeing to her plan. It’s not that Luke didn't think that Y/N would have her own life before him, he just thought that he life wouldn't be so much of a problem. He just thought that she would want to be with him, her soulmate, more than she would want to be…well whatever her profession was. Was being her soulmate not enough for her? Was being Luke Hemmings not enough? He is successful, and he’s always told how handsome he is. What else could he do?

“Do you have a phone charger?” Y/N asks. Her phone died sometime during the police investigation, and she needed to check some things for a school project.

“Sure” Luke says, taking her phone and plugging it into his charger. The couples were still fighting about god-knows-what. They had moved off the topic of what they had to give up to be with the boys and were spread out into their own arguments now.

“Yo!” Alyssa suddenly yells, shutting everybody up.

“What?” Jackie says annoyed. Her finger is poised into Michaels chest. Michael looks more frightened than he ever has before.

“Nothing, this is just getting stupid. And we have the computer final in three hours,” Alyssa says looking at Y/N, “So what are the two of you going to do?” She says bluntly.

“I’ll catch up to the tour in four days; after finals,” Y/N says. All the girls give approving nods. While the boys look a little bug eyed. “What if Luke gets sick,”

“We can’t lose out lead singer,”

“Just come with us”

Emily grabs Ashton’s collar and tugs him down to her height. “You are Lucky she is willing to come on this stupid tour,” Emily looks at the rest of the guys now, “So shut up,” She says darkly. Y/N and Alyssa make eye contact after Emily says her thing; they both whisper a quick “Damn.” Michael, still looks frightened, while Calum stage whispers, “Whipped.” Luke just stays seated on the bed looking at Y/N like its the last time he’s going to see her. Y/N stands, preparing herself for what she is about to say.

“Alyssa is right, I need to go,” Y/N says, then she leans down and kisses Luke on the cheek, leaving the whole room surprised. She grabs her phone off the charger, a glowing 5% lit up in the top corner. It will have to do. Y/N and Alyssa are halfway out the door when Luke yells.

“Wait!” He yells, Y/n and Alyssa turn around, expecting the worse. Luke just takes Y/N’s phone out of her hand and inserts his name and number into it. “Okay baby,” He says, then leaning down to peck Y/N on her cheek. The girls ‘aww” in the background, followed by groans from the boys.

“I’ll see you in four days,”

“Four days,”

Then she left, again.

+++

“All will come to a happy end” Y/N whispers to herself. She was on her way to Holmdel New Jersey. Thats where the boys were today, along with their soulmates. She just finished her last semester at college. Her final grades will be in soon. Y/N is secretly happy that she chose a career that she can do on the road with Luke.

What Y/N was not happy about was the twitter notifications. It had been after her Computer final. She doesn't have notifications on regularly, but if she had they would've been bombarded. When Y/N saw the little red bubble in the corner of her app with over one hundred notifications on it she was shocked, and a little scared. Y/N is always happy with being unknown. She loved being anonymous, having nobody know her, having nobody pry into her private life. Y/N would have to admit that she would miss it. It’s inevitable now that she’s the Luke Hemming’s soulmate that people would be curious. Y/N understood their curiosity to some extent. She understood that they loved Luke and wanted to make sure she was treating him well. She sometimes looked up celebrities and did the same thing. Did they really need to know her middle name though? Or the town she grew up in? It was ridiculous. Why do they have to care about her? She is just supposed to be a nobody, but here she was, soulmates to Luke Fucking Hemmings.

Y/N arrives at the Hotel and parks her car in the lot. Outside the doors there was bunches of fans. Y/n expected to just walk through, unstopped, because she is a nobody right? Wrong. When the fans get a first glimpse of her, her name “Y/N” and “Luke’s soulmate” ran through he crowed of girls. They don’t move from the door though, not wanting to give up their spots. When she gets in reaching distance there is asks for her picture and autograph, which amazes her. Why do they care?

Y/N takes a few awkward pictures, and signs a few random strips of paper and walks inside. She never thought she would have to do that. She never wanted to do that. She only did it because she had waited outside of hotels before, trying to get a glimpses of her favorite bands. She knows what its like to be ignored before.

Luke and her have been texting and they were staying in the same hotel room on the fourth floor. He was in soundcheck right now, so she would have to get the keycard from one of the girls that was left behind. Y/N tugs on her suitcase to bring it into the hotel elevator next to her and presses the button labeled “4.” Thats when the dreaded thinking starts. She feels so torn right now. There is Luke, but there is also her career. She left Alyssa for Luke, but if she could choose who would she choose? Probably Alyssa. Y/N doesn't know Luke that well. She knows that one day she will love Luke, but right now, she feels more loyal to Alyssa. Does that make her a bitch? Probably. Y/N wants a career outside of Luke. She needs to feel productive, not just a trophy wife. or girlfriend. or whatever they are. She settles it in her mind, she may have had to leave Alyssa, but she won’t leave her career. As soon as she settles on this the door to the elevator opens.

She makes her way down to room number 127, which is supposedly Ashton and Emily’s room. The door swings open to reveal a Jackie, and behind her Emily and Alex. “Hey,” Y/N says suddenly nervous. They all look skeptical of her, but Y/N couldn't blame them. Every time they have seen each other, there has been yelling. “Luke said to get the keycard from one of you?” Y/N asks nervously, her bag next to her.

Jackie motions her to come inside the room. Y/N steps into the room and Emily stands and gets a card off the dresser. Emily holds out the card and Y/N reaches for the card, but Alex beats to it, snatching it out of Emily’s hand. “So tell us about yourself?” Alex says waving the card around. Y/N takes a deep breath.

“Um, well…” Y/N trails off, “What do you want to know?” She asks finding her words.

“Do you stan the band?” Jackie suddenly asks.

“Do I what?”

“Do you stan the band? Do you like 5sos?” Jackie asks again in a ‘duh’ tone.

“Sure?” Y/N says it as a question. The other girls look at her skeptically. “I mean, I’m not a huge fan, but I never hated their music…” Y/N trials off again, hoping she didn't just make it worse.

“Omg same,”Alex suddenly breaths out, causing a quick “what?” from the other girls. “I was never a big fan until i was one of their soulmates! And then once I said I was a fan everybody assumed i was some big fangirl, which I’m not.” Alex says quickly, to the surprise of the other girls. “I love them now, obviously,” She says in a ‘duh’ tone.

“I was always a big fan,” Emily says, having Jackie agree with her. “Tell me you at least know who ketchup is?” Emily says with begging eyes.

“Who?” Y/N and Alex reply. Emily and Jackie groan at their obliviousness. “Do you remember that Hannah Montana episode where they rubbed their hands in ketchup?” Y/N says after a few beats of silence. The other girls laugh, remembering the episode.

“I remember trying that!” Jackie yells, causing the other girls to laugh at her stupidness. “Hey! I was like seven, don’t laugh!” Jackie says, trying to defend herself.

“I remember when I was seven, I broke my arm playing golf,” Alex pauses, causing the other girls to scream “how the hell did you break your arm playing golf?” Alex just shrugs her shoulders and continues with the story, “After the hospital, i put ketchup all over the cast because my brother said it would make my arm feel better,” Alex finishes the story, looking at the gasps of horror on the other girl’s faces. “I remember when my brother was like ten and i was seven, My brother and his friend were play sword fight in the driveway, but there were no more plastic swords and i wanted to play, so i took a golf club and clubbed my brother in the head!” Y/N says, the girls look at her in horror until Y/N adds that everyone was fine. All the girls break down laughing then.

They all sit there for a while, forgetting about Luke’s room, talking about stupid things they did when they were younger. Then Alex checks the time.

“We should probably go to diner now if we want to make the concert,” Alex says.

“Yeah, let me put my suitcase in my room?” Y/N asks. As they are walking to her room, Y/N asks another question, “Do you guys always go to the concerts?”

“Not really anymore.” Emily replies, “We’re going tonight since it’s your first night and all,” She explains. Then Y/N remembers something.

“I’m sorry by the way, for yelling at you?” Y/N apologizes. Emily nods along to what Y/N says and accepts the apology saying, “that you were just trying to protect your friend.”

Y/N slips her keycard into the door 128 and it opens. She walks inside, flipping on the light. Y/N gasps under her breath, and swears a little. There is only one bed in the room. She is sleeping with Luke tonight.

+++

Luke bites his lip, and tries to relax. It seems impossible. His muscles are tightening, causing his strumming to be irregular and awkward. He could tell by the looks of Calum and the other band members that, he wasn’t doing so hot. They were at soundcheck right now. Luke is so nervous for Y/N to see him that its affecting his playing. He is forgetting lyrics and strumming the wrong chords.

“Luke what’s going on?” Calum asks him, as they leave the stage.

“I don’t know, I’m just nervous,” Luke says, trying to rationalize his feelings. It was the first time Y/N would see the band play, after all. The boys were supposed to meet the girls for diner in about a half hour, so they all go quickly change into something less sweaty and are on their way.

When they arrive, Jackie, Alex, Emily and Y/N were already sitting at the table, the four seats across from them open. Luke hangs back a little. The other boys give their respective soulmates a kiss and sit across. Luke just looks at the back of her head, imagining the last image of her face he can remember. The blush from his kiss, the sweat from the night gleaming on her forehead, and the worry in her eyes. Now he is ready for a new image of her.

She looks beautiful, is all he can think as he catches the first glimpses of her. Her hair is long, but not too long, basically glowing in the light. Her eyes glimmer with hope? maybe a little anxiety? She seems relaxed with the girls, but once the group of guys came, she seemed to freeze a little.

Luke walks over to her seat and offers her his hand. She is already staring at him, quickly looking between him and his hand. Then she takes it. Luke pulls her up into his body, hugging her tightly. Luke, looking at the rest of the group sees some approving nods from the boys and warm smiles from the girls, then he closes his eyes because all he wanted to do was memorize Y/N.

Y/N leans into him, unsure if She is ready for this or not.

The concert is loud. The only thought that can run through Y/N’s head is the direction you are going in. Fans are crowded in the pit, were she is to be standing during the concert. A few girls come up to the rest of the soulmates, looking for a autograph or maybe a pass backstage (The girls have been known to give a few out). Jackie, Emily, Alex, and Y/N stand on Calum’s side of the stage, to Calum’s enjoyment. Y/N spots Michael give a jealous look during the concert also.

Luke couldn't keep his eyes off of Y/N. She notices how he would continue to steal glances at her during the concert. There is something surreal, knowing that somebody will love you. It leaves Y/N gasping every time. She never thought about having a soulmate until now. Now she knows whats it’s like, could she ever leave? It was not secret, at least to herself, that she didn't want to be famous. She didn't want to have to sneak around. She didn't want to be the person that gave out backstage passes. Y/N is secure in her anonymity.

Y/N couldn't keep her eyes off of Luke. She watched him jump around and have the time of his life on stage. Could she give him that happiness? If she couldn’t could she leave him? She shakes her head, this is crazy talk. They’re soulmates. Soulmates are made for each other. They can’t leave. If they leave they will start to get sick after a few days, and if it last a few weeks, they’ll die. All of this goes into effect after they meet of course. Y/N doesn't know what to do. The answer seems so obvious, to give in and be with Luke, become famous, and tour the world. But also there is parts of her which is refusing. She doesn't want that. She doesn't want to be famous. She never cared to tour the whole world. But she does want Luke.

When they get back to the hotel rooms, Y/N excuses herself from the rest of the girls. They were all pretty tired, so they skipped seeing the boys after the show tonight, in favor of seeing them later on. Y/N goes to the bed in Luke and her’s hotel room, and sits on the bed. She bury’s her head into her hands. It hurt to think of leaving. But could she stay? And give up everything? Once your Famous, it’s not like you can go back.

This is how Luke found her. He heard her sobs from the outside of the door. It was like his heart was breaking with each of her sobs. He stands in the doorway of the room, scared to help, but more scared to leave. She is mumbling about being unsure. Her head lifts from her hands and makes eye contact with Luke, which she quickly breaks. Luke thinks his breathing stopped when she looked away. Luke takes a careful step foreword, closing the door. Nobody needs to see this. Y/N is looking frantically around the room, trying to associate herself with her surroundings. Her breath is picking up, to the point where she seems to be choking on nothing. Luke stands frozen in the door as he watches her fall apart.

“I can’t do this!” Her strangled cry runs out. Luke rushes to her.

“What can’t you do?” He places an arm around her. He tries to bring her to his body, but she lashes out.

She doesn't know who is sitting next to her. Y/N feels the connection, but when it tries to restrain her she lashes out. She doesn't want to be controlled. She had been controlled her whole life. Now she wanted the freedom to be herself, not just somebody's soulmate. Words like this and worse run through her head. She remembers how she was called fat as a kid, she remembers being bullied on the playground, she remembers the first time a boy looked at her as more than just a fat kid. It had been after she lost all the weight. It was the same boy that bullied her. She remembers how she bought into his lies. She remembers throwing up. She remembers everything. She doesn't want to be that little kid anymore, who was controlled by her bullies. She wants to walk the streets without judgement and without being acknowledged. She doesn’t want to be Luke’s soulmate. Why did it have to be her?

“I can’t do this!” She cries out again, grabbing his shirt, fisting it into her hands. She can’t handle the judging. She can’t handle it! “Why,” She cries out.

“Why what?” A warm voice says.

“Why do I have to be his soulmate?” She chokes out.

+++

“Why do I have to be his soulmate?” She chokes out. “You have to be his soulmate, because thats your destiny,” Luke says quietly, wrapping his arms around her. His mind begins to race with questions about not being good enough, but he pushes them back. Right now his soulmate needs him. “Its like how the world turns, and how the bird fly south in the winter, its their destiny. I bet if you gave him a chance, it wouldn't be so bad,” Luke says softly. Y/N’s hands tighten in his shirt.

“I don’t want to be famous,” She cries out. She tugs on Luke’s shirt more, he is sure it will rip soon.

“It’s okay baby,” The words slip from Luke’s mouth easily. He says it as a whisper, only meant for her. He presses his lips to her forehead.

She looks up, her eyes glassy. He watches her eyes as they change in recognition. She scrambles back to the end of the bed. “I’m sorry,” She whispers, swiping a stray tear from her cheek.

“No, it’s okay,” Luke whispers, edging closer to her. “It’s my dream to be famous, not yours,” He whispers, edging closer again. She watches the inches between them disappear. Luke sees her muscles tighten, ready to flee if necessary. The thoughts of not being enough are back and flooding his mind. Luke struggles to stay focused on her, like he should be. “Y/N,” He whispers, and every single one of her muscles tighten again, preparing herself like a cat ready to spring.

“It’s not okay…Luke,” She says recognizing who it is in the room with her. It would never be okay with her. “How am I supposed to do this?” She asks, the tears welling up in her eyes again.

“No, no, you don’t have to do anything. We are doing this together.” Luke says, taking her hands. He wraps them in his own and gives a small squeeze. Her body relaxes back into the bed. She nods like a small child, willing to believe anything their parents say. “Look, look at what is written on this skin,” Luke pulls his shirt sleeve up to show faded sharpie marks of their short conversations. He had been washing around his arm for the past week, trying to preserve the little conversation they had. Luke had dozens of photos on his phone of the text in its prime. “It’s you and me, baby. Forever.”

“What if I can’t do this? I can’t handle the pressure,” She cries out, trying to convey how broken she is. She is trying to tell him how she can’t do it.

“It’s okay, It’s okay, we’ll start slow okay?” Luke rushes to say, trying to quiet her down again. Trying to stop her tears. “We can’t be apart. So your just gonna come on tour with us okay? We don’t have to tell anyone who you are, we don’t have to tell anyone, okay? All you need to do is be on the tour bus with us,” Luke says gently, trying to get her to agree. She nods numbly. Y/N is still shaking a little.

“Do you want to go to the tour bus now?” Luke asks. Y/N gives a nod. “Okay,” Luke stands, and pulls Y/N up with him. Y/N quickly looks around for her bag, but Luke grabs her face and focuses her attention back to him. “I’ll get our bags later, okay?” Y/N gives an approving nod and they move out of the room, one hand on Y/N’s back.

The two of them pass Ashton in the hall. Once he see’s Y/N’s red eyes and tear strewn face he opens his mouth to say something, but Luke quickly gives him a look. Ashton ducks his head and moves to his room to pack.

When Ashton gets to his room he grabs Emily by her arm and spins her around to face him. “Wha- Hey Ashy!” She says with a big smile. She quickly spots his serious mood and her smile fades. “What’s wrong?” She asks, her body at attention. Emily is a helper, that is who she is. She lives to make people smile and happy, much like Ashton. Ashton tells he what he saw in the hall.

Emily quickly starts going down the stairs to try and catch Luke and Y/N to try and help when she bumps into Mikey right outside of her door.

“Hey, Em, What do you think of Blue? Because Jackie says- Hey! why ya in such a rush?” Michael asks Emily. Emily looks up, panic in her eyes. Michael quickly jumps into action. “Are you okay? Emily? Do I need to get Ash?” He asks quickly. Emily rarely panics, so to see her in such a jumpy state was rare. Emily is more of a calm helper.

“No, it’s Y/N, Ashton saw Luke taking her out to the bus-“ “So?”

“Let me finish Mikey! She was crying, I want to go see if I can help,” Emily moves to walk around Michael, but he quickly grabs her arm and pulls her back.

“No, I’m sure Luke’s got it,” Michael says, but he wasn't so sure. His and Luke’s rooms are next to each other, and he thinks that he heard some crying in there. Maybe even a panic attack, Michael thinks, remembering the heavy breathing and the yelling. Michael pushes Emily back into the open door to her room, “Just stay here, Luke’s got it,” Michael promises, leaving her there.

Michael walks back to his room. He knows what panic attacks are like, and Emily doesn’t, he would be much better helper. Michael just wants to check on Jackie first. He opens the door to the room to see Jackie with her checklist, making sure that everything was packed. Jackie may be punk rock, but she is secretly like Monica from Friends. Always has a list in her hand. “I’m going to head down to the bus,” Michael announces to Jackie.

“What? I thought we were gonna ‘do it’ one more time!” Jackie says, protesting.

Michael shakes his head. “I would love to, but I think Y/N needs me,” Michael tries to explain.

“Why would Y/N need you?” Jackie says, getting immediately defensive.

“Not like that baby, I think she had a panic attack,” Michael says, grabbing Jackie’s hips and pulling them into his.

“Is she with Luke?” Jackie asks, knowing that only a soulmate could calm down Y/N. Jackie had been there for a few of Michaels most recent panic attacks, and it seems like Jackie always knew the best thing to say to help him calm down. It’s odd that anybody can calm Michael down too, considering he likes to be alone when he's having a panic attack. “Then everything is okay, okay babe?” Jackie says. She pulls away from Michael and sits him down on the bed. “Finish packing,” Jackie demands, handing him a list.

Jackie walks out of the room feeling more nervous then ever. Even though she has only known Y/N for a night, she just fits in so well with the girls…. Jackie walks over to Alex, and Calum’s room for reassurance from Alex. Jackie knows if she tells Michael just how nervous she is about Y/N he would storm down to the bus to try and help, which could just make things worse. Also, sometimes people just need their best friend. “Hey,” Alex says opening the door.

“Y/N had a panic attack!” The words rush out of Jackie’s mouth. She is the worst at keeping secrets.

“What? Is she okay?” Alex says quickly, moving out of the room and into the hall. Y/N had told the girls that she will sometimes get bad panic attacks when she is really stressed out, and they are like hell for her. She also mentioned that she is scared to be soulmates with Luke, something that all the girls kinda just breezed over.

“I don’t know Luke took her down to the bus,” Jackie says, and Calum walks up behind them.

“What happened?” He says, oblivious to what was going on.

“Y/N had a panic attack,” Alex says, filling in her soulmate.

“Does Luke know?” Calum says. The girls give him a ‘duh’ look and Calum puts his hands up in surrender. “She is probably fine then. Luke’s got this,” Calum says, trying to reason.

Suddenly, two more doors open on the floor at the same time. Michael stood in one door and Emily stood in another with Ashton behind her. Everyone froze in the hall, they all know what’s going on and want to help, but all frozen, knowing that Luke is the only one who can truly help. Like a movie, they all walk to meet in the center of the hall.

“I have to go down there and help,” Michael says, about to turn away when Jackie, his soulmate, grabs his arm.

“No, we can’t” Jackie says. “Luke is her best bet,” She says.

“I think we should go down there!” Emily says to the circle. He motherly instinct kicking in. “Luke can handle it,” Calum says, his usually quiet voice rising over the rest. “Jackie knows it, and we all know it. You all will just overwhelm her,” Calum says from experience. The boys had helped Micheal out with his panic attacks before, and he would hate it when the three of them would crowed around him asking questions. They did it to try and help him, but it didn't do so well with working.

The elevator chimes abruptly and the group looks over to see Luke walking out of the elevator. Everyone quickly jumps on him, not literally.

“Luke!”

“Is Y/N okay?”

“Can we go see her?”

Their questions are sprung onto Luke, and he feels like he is at a press conference suddenly. He looks around the group, and with their frantic eyes, he figures that they all knew what happened. Luke takes a deep breath and begins to speak.

+++

“She’s okay,” The group lets out a collective sigh. The worry seeping out of all of them, that some didn't even realize that they had.

“Can we go see her?” Michael asks, ready to jump around Luke to help someone who has gone through the same as him.

“I don’t know,” Luke breaths out. He is unsure about what to do next, he is unsure if he should be doing anything. He would never be enough for her, so why try? Luke will never be enough for the girl who is destined to share a bed with him. And he knew it. He knew it when she said she didn't want to be famous. He knew it when she didn’t want to be his soulmate. He knew it when she was crying hysterically about wanting more for herself. Luke will never be enough.

As if sensing his friend’s sadness, Micheal wraps Luke into a hug, followed by the rest of the group. They look at Luke in worry, they know he’s been going through a lot with Y/N right now, but none of them had stopped to think about how that would really be effecting him.

Ashton pulls away first and begins to take charge. “Okay, Mikey and Emily, go down and make sure Y/N is okay. The rest of us will stay up here, with Luke, finish packing, and be down in a half hour with everything,” Ashton says. He sends Michael down with Emily to see if Y/N is okay, because he knows the two of them are probably he most nurturing, well Emily is. Michael just understands what she is going through.

Ashton leads Luke to his room, where Luke begins to grab his things and put it back in his suitcase. “What’s wrong Luke?” Ashton asks, and Luke slams his suitcase onto the bed, which only caused it to bounce a little.

“Nothing,” Luke grits out. Luke is not an angry person, so what’s left of the group flinches back a little.

“Can we have some space?” Ashton asks the rest of the group. Jackie and Alex nod and turn to leave, but Calum stays put. Alex looks over her shoulder and motions for Calum to follow, but with a shake of his head, Calum stays put. Ashton looks over his shoulder to see Calum and Calum just gives a small shrug.

“What's got you upset, mate?” Ashton asks, accepting the fact that Calum is here to stay.

“I don’t think she wants me.”

“What do you mean she doesn't want you? You’re her soulmate?” Ashton exclaims, and Calum gives a subtle nod.

“I mean, she wants to do something more with her life! Something I can’t give her! She says she doesn't want to be famous!” Luke exclaims, violently throwing clothes into his suitcase.

“She can be something while being with you,” Ashton tries to reason. “Look, I don’t think she knew it was me in the room when she said this, but she said, ‘Why do i have to be his soulmate?’ If that isn't enough to say that she doesn’t want me, I don’t know what is.” Luke says, throwing his suitcase shut.

“Mate…” Ashton begins to say, but Luke’s choking sobs cut him off.

“I just want to be enough for someone,” Luke says, sitting down on the bed. Silent tears roll down his face, as the horrible thoughts flood into his brain. Luke bows his head, as he thinks of what could’ve been. If he just had a different soulmate. If only he had someone who would thing he’s enough. He’s nice. He’s been told all his life how handsome he is. He brings home enough money to support them. Why does she want to have more? What could she want that he can’t give her.

“Luke…” Ashton starts again, but he is out of words.

“Luke, its not that you aren’t enough,” Calum says, kneeling down next to Luke. “There are just some things that you can’t give people. From what I hear from Alex, Y/N is not someone to sit back and relax. She is always doing something. It’s not that you are not enough, it’s that she wants something more outside of Love.” Luke nods numbly along to what Calum says. “She needs you, just as much as you want her. You can’t give up on these kinds of things,” Luke throws himself off the bed and onto Calum, wrapping him into a hug. “Let’s all finish packing and go down, yeah?” Calum asks after a few moments. Luke peels himself off of Calum and turns to finish packing.

When the whole group is ready, they proceed to the bus.

When Luke is outside the bus, a few steps away from the door, he feels something heavy jump onto him. He stumbles back a few steps, and drops both suitcases in an effort to catch the girl.

“I’m so sorry,” His soulmate whispers in his ear. +++

“I’m so sorry,” His soulmate whispers in his ear.

“For what baby girl,” Luke whispers back.

“For saying I didn’t want you. I want you. Damn do I want you,” Y/N whispers in his ear, biting it playfully. Luke smiles, holding his baby close. He tucks her under his chin.

“I want you too,” Luke says, “But I think we need to talk,”

“Yeah, okay,” Y/N agrees. The two of them commandeer the back room of the bus, closing the sliding door. The other’s had little argument, because after all that had happened today, they all knew that the pair of them needed alone time.

They sit in the back of the bus, on the circular couch, across from each other. Luke’s legs are so long that they tangle in Y/N’s. She discreetly leans her own legs against Luke’s. They sit there for a few moments, looking at each other. Luke looks up at her through his eyelashes, flashing his baby-blues, and says, “Baby, won’t you come over here?” He asks, his hands wringing.

Y/N swiftly moves to sit next to him and Luke cheekily does a yawn-and-stretch, wrapping his arm around Y/N. He pulls her into his chest, and she leans her head onto his chest.

“What are we going to do?” Luke asks, nervous for her reply.

“I-I can’t, I want to have a job, Luke,” Luke opens his mouth to say something, but Y/N quickly catches on and playfully covers it. Luke scrunches his eyebrows a little and looks down to her. “I’m going to freelance coding” Y/N tells Luke. She glances up at him through her eyelashes, ready for his argument.

“Okay, that sounds good baby,” Luke says. Y/N lets out a sigh that she didn’t know she was holding.

They sit there for a few beats, breathing in each other. They are both memorizing each other, unknowingly to the other. They both sit there, listening to the other’s breaths. They both sit there, hearing the other’s heartbeat. They both sit there trying to remember that the other is alive. That they are together. That they wouldn’t let go of each other.

Y/N lets out a heavy breath, bringing Luke’s attention to her. She starts to wiggle out of his hold, and announces that she has to pee, making Luke give a little chuckle. She opens the sliding door and moves out of the room. Luke still doesn’t know much about his Soulmate, but he knows that he will have his whole life to learn about her. He does know the way her hair shines in the sun though. He knows that nobody’s eyes can sparkle like her’s. He knows he will never go looking at another girl again. Why would he when he has Y/N?

A bubbling Michael burst through the door, “Its me the love of you life!” He proclaims.

“Please, I can wear heels bigger than your dick,” Luke says, quickly responding without thinking. Michael lets out a big, stomach rumbling laugh.

“Please,” Micheal begs, his laughter continuing on. Luke gives a fake chuckle, before Emily pushes pas Mikey.

“What’s so funny,” Emily asks.

“Baby, come back, i wanna cuddle,” Ashton whines, following his soulmate to the back room. He grabs her hand and drags her to the couch across from Luke and pulls Emily to sit on Ashton’s lap facing him. For once in his life, Luke isn’t jealous of the pair. He has his own little sunshine.

“What’s going on?” Y/N asks, pushing past Michael, who is still standing in the doorway. Y/N moves to sit next to Luke again, but Luke wasn’t having it. He’s only been able to touch her for the past few hours, so he will be damned if she only sat next to him. Luke pulls his baby girl onto his lap, his chin resting on her shoulder. “Nice butt Emily” Y/N comments playfully, facing the pair, and Emily throws her hands to protect her already covered behind. Ashton’s hands quickly cover her’s and soon he is the one holding Emily’s bum. Y/N watches as Ashton pulls Emily in for a kiss and Luke squeaks, covering Y/N’s eyes.

“Do you wanna watch a movie?” Michael says from the doorway. They all hear a distant yes from the front of the bus. Jackie walks past Michael and motions for him to follow her. Calum and Alex show up in the doorway holding hands.

“I heard we were watching a movie?” Calum asks dragging Alex to the couch. Everybody moved to make room, but every one was still squished.

“What movie?” Emily asks, attempting to turn around so she can see the tv, but Ashton tightened his grip on her, not wanting her to move.

“Deadpool, duh,” Michael says, getting up and popping the DVD into the player. He sits back down, causing a groan from Jackie and Calum, whom he was sitting in-between.

Was this what family is like? Y/N has to wonder as the movie begins. Putting up with each other’s bullshit? Is this what family was like, watching the tv together. YN had always found family with her friend Alyssa, but she had never had people other than Alyssa care when she had a panic attack. Emily and Michael really helped Y/N. They understood what she is going through. Talking to Emily is like talking to a long-lost friend. They just clicked so well, just like Y/N and Alyssa did. It’s amazing. The group dynamic is just so nurturing for creativity, and they genuinely care. Even though Y/N is the latest addition, they all were so worried about her.

It’s a few days later. Y/N and Luke is just getting to know each other. Trying to figure out their patterns, and to try and remember their habits. They are both trying to memorize the other. They are back in New York City after Toronto, and Y/N is excited because she asked Alyssa to drive down to meet her. She drags Luke through the city which she visited every few weeks as a kid. Y/N’s parents were obsessed with the city, but didn’t want their children to grow up in it.

“Hey!” Alyssa shouts, wrapping Y/N into a hug. Luke is standing behind Y/N in aviator and a hat. He looks around a little worried that fans would pop out and drag him away. Luke loves his fans, but right now his whole mind is focused on Y/N and meeting Alyssa formally.

The two girls walk into the restaurant chatting, and Luke follows. Y/N had told Luke that Alyssa is like her sister, and that she didn’t care if they were soulmates, Alyssa’s opinion could break them up. Luke wasn’t that worried though, wasn't Alyssa a fan?

Sure, Y/N told Luke that Alyssa could break them up, but it wasn't exactly true. Nothing could break up soulmates, and Alyssa would be stupid to try and break them up. She told Luke that to get him nervous. She wanted Luke to really try to like Alyssa, Y/N is worried that Luke would only look at her like a fan, not a friend.

“So Luke…” Alyssa starts, drawing out her words. Y/N is quick to hide her face, knowing what question is coming next.

“Have you and Y/N done the dirty yet?” Alyssa asks, and Luke chokes a little on his coffee.

“Um, no? I’m not a rabbit,” Luke says, trying to add some humor to the conversation. When he gets no reaction he goes on, “But if Y/N wanted to, I would. I don’t want to pressure her,” Luke says.

“Okay, so have you gone on any dates?” Alyssa asks, and Y/N quickly picks up her head. “Give it to me,” Y/N demands.

“Give what to you?” Alyssa says playing innocent.

“The tape recorder,” Y/N says. Luke looks between the two of them with wide eyes. His soulmate is badass. How did she know that Alyssa has a tape recorder, Luke wonders.

“What tape recorder?” Alyssa asks.

“The one in your pocket,” Y/N says confidently. She knows that Alyssa has a fan account for 5sos and to get an exclusive interview on Luke and his soulmate would be pure gold. Alyssa throws a tape recorder onto the table, the film inside still running. “The other one too,” Y/N says with a sigh. Another tape recorder is thrown up onto the table. “And your phone,” Y/N says again and Alyssa’s iphone, which is opened up to the voice memo app is on the table. Y/N carefully stops all the recordings and takes the tapes out, and deletes the voice memo. “I thought I told you no taping?” Y/N whines to her best friend.

“Sorry bub, but this was such a good opportunity!” Alyssa says, jumping in her seat a little.

“Oh, Alyssa,” Y/N says, “I thought we said, Friend first, Fangirl second!” Y/N yells playfully. Alyssa and Y/N let out laughs, not knowing what they were laughing about themselves. Luke looks around nervously, not understanding the joke, if you could call it that.

They leave the Café after a few hours, heading back to the tourbus with Alyssa so she can see it and meet everybody else properly. They all walk excitedly to the bus. Alyssa and Luke got along really well, and Y/N is happy about that.

Y/N glance up and quickly recognizes a face, one that she hadn’t seen since College. Her eyes widen and she nudges Alyssa about it. She looks up too and recognizes the face. It was a name that she has written about on her skin before.

“Tom?”

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anxiety-trademark · 4 years ago

Text

The week in review:

Raw 12/07 NXT 12/09 NXT UK 12/10 Smackdown 12/11

Raw:

Nia hyping up Shayna. That’s nice.

Shayna vs Asuka should’ve been a ppv match during Asuka’s reign. They don’t seem to care that much about protecting Shayna in tag matches, as she always eats the pin, so I’m not sure why they protect her so much in singles. She submitted Asuka (along with everyone else) in the elimination chamber, Asuka should want to prove herself better than Shayna. This is why I liked Becky’s reign, I loved the aspect of her collecting her debts against people who had wronged her, and the sideplates of the former champions she beat. That jacket was dope. The story was dope.

Man Shayna is so strong, that girl is built like a bull. I swear her bmi must be as low as Bayley’s.

How did Shayna of all people make taking a release German suplex look better than like a dozen other women in the past year? Good for her. Knows how to actually jump.

Lol so Lana willingly jumps onto Nia’s shoulders in the position of a powerbomb, and as Nia is walking her over to the announce desk, Lana sends Nia into it with a headscissors takedown. That’s great.

Lana’s just running away lmao.

Shayna just ate an L via rollup. See? Protection.

I was gonna force myself to sit through Dana’s backstage segment with Ricochet, but then Riddle popped up, and honestly? Can’t be bothered.

Welp I don’t do mixed tag matches unless they’re compelling... which this is not.

Hate: Asuka being a cheerleader for fucking Lana. She is the Raw women’s champion, does anyone remember this??? Terrible stuff.

Love: Asuka leaving Lana with some stupid mantra to repeat to herself before Lana turns to find herself face to face with Nia. Great stuff.

Nia just shaking her head as Lana slowly, oh so slowly, backs away. Fantastic. See this would all be a compelling midcard feud if the Raw women’s title wasn’t involved, is that a fair complaint? I feel like that’s a fair complaint.

Points to Nia for not breaking.

Highlight: Nia intimidating Lana backstage by merely looking at her

---

NXT:

Toni claims Ember stole her thunder, and honestly? I can see it. They both moved (back, in Ember’s case) to nxt the same night, and which one was given the promo time in the middle of the ring to start off the following week’s show? Not Toni. Who was propelled into a feud almost immediately against Dakota, a top player? Not Toni. Who got the opportunity to share the ring with former nxt champion Rhea in the main event? Not Toni.

Well apparently Io doesn’t like Toni lmao.

Io sets Toni up for the moonsault, and Toni rolls out of the ring. I criticize wwe for being predictable, but I’m gonna be honest when I say that I did NOT predict Ember running down from out of nowhere just to topple Toni. That was great. Shame this is absolutely leading to a tag match.

So Ember rolls Toni back into the ring and Io hits the moonsault... and then proceeds to pin her before she realizes what she’s doing and rolls off lol. Should’ve just committed, crowd would’ve counted to 3 for her and it would’ve been great.

That’s right Raquel, go destroy Ember in the name of Dakota. Can’t believe my second favorite performer on that roster isn’t there tonight. BLASPHEMY.

Xia out here striking wooden pegs and I can actually see the purpose. Boa getting the shit beat out of him? Not understanding the point there. They call it penance, but Wade is right, looks like torture. Guess it’s more of a mental thing though, right? Break the nerves and sensitivity?

*The Way celebrates their TakeOver victories* No.

Wow Ember gets the main event match again? Man, yikes for Toni. Cool for Raquel though, this is the furthest she’s gone in her singles career without Dakota.

That Eclipse onto those 2 chairs was brutal, Dakota is a trooper.

I really dislike Ember’s persona, and I would love to see her be humbled. She did jack shit on the MR and has the audacity to run back to nxt beaming with arrogance?

Nice, Raquel hits Ember with a boot to the midsection as Ember’s in midair, and she flies back a few feet. Impactful.

Why is Ember selling her lower back? Is that genuine? An ongoing injury, or something from WarGames?

Kind of a slow moving headscissors into a tornado ddt, but it’s such a beautiful move that I don’t even care.

Does Ember typically do her suicide dive through the bottom and second rope? If so, I’m beginning to understand why hers looks so friggin brutal. Peeps going through the second and top rope always kind of gracefully land on their opponents. Ember looks like a missile.

That’s cool; Ember’s crazy ass was climbing up some metal thing, Raquel goes over and pulls her off, Ember lands perfectly on Raquel’s shoulder in a one armed fireman’s carry, then Raquel tosses her face first into the ring post. Ember landed perfectly on the apron, too. Good spot.

Raquel is dangling through the ropes with her head near the ring post and Ember charges at her on the apron. Raquel eats a knee to the side of the head but puts her hand up between her and the ring post so she doesn’t accidentally smack her head against it. She’s very safe and aware of her surroundings, I’m noticing. That’s gonna take her really far.

That was a good match. I can see why Raquel is getting set up for a push. She’s safe, strong, sells well, has an intimidating look, and is serviceable on the mic. I can see the appeal.

Toni’s come to deliver a receipt to the receipt she received herself.

LMFAO Toni goes to pull up Ember and jumps when she hears Rhea’s music. That history runs DEEP. That was hilarious, she genuinely looks shook.

Oh that focus in Rhea’s eyes is great. Man she’s come so far this past year.

Rhea is such a solid babyface. She does all the right things as a leader of the division would without going overboard and coming off as a doormat. Asuka is the complete opposite; does nothing to help her division from unfair shenanigans, and when she does, she come off as an idiot.

Man that tension between Rhea and Toni is thick. They’re like the same age too, right? Their futures will be heavily entwined.

...Alright well honestly I was more enchanted by the concept of a Rhea/Toni feud, even though we’ve seen that like 3 times, than a rehash of Rhea/Raquel. I knew this was coming, but you’re kind of killing my vibe, here.

I actually really liked the Raquel/Rhea fight but I feel like they have subzero heat outside of an actual match. They suck at hyping a future fight between each other. Basically they’re the exact opposite as Rhea/Toni, since Rhea and Toni have like... never had a good match, yet always know how to sell one to me anyway lmao.

Highlight: Ember vs Raquel

---

NXT UK:

Jinny out here calling Piper a wild animal lol. Her in-match dialogue sucks, but I’m here for her as a promo.

“[Isla] has yet to really kick out of first gear [...] what does Isla Dawn need to do to keep her momentum moving forward?” She needs to literally move out of first gear and work on her stamina, holy shit. She’s one of the weakest in the cardio department imo.

Since I’m already being critical, Xia is super overhyped and I need everyone to calm down. She has a lot to work on before she should even be considered midcard.

Yes sure, Xia has technical fundamentals and literally nothing else. Oh she’s only 22? That makes more sense. Man the UK stars are young lol.

We’ve finally moved past wrist locks, miracles have occurred.

Imagine being a kickboxer and not utilizing that in your arsenal. Look at that, suddenly I’m actually being entertained by Isla for the first time. More miracles have occurred.

Xia “look at my fundamentals” Brookside, can you please explain who you’re yelling ‘come on’ to? There is literally nobody there. Are you hyping me up? Hm?? Hyping me up for another hurricanrana???

Xia very obviously helped roll Isla out of the ring there.

I really need announcers to stop assuming every wrestler is about to do a suicide dive/is gonna fly/do a high risk move. It’s seldom they toss out this assumption and are wrong, but every time I’ve seen it the performer went to do a mere baseball slide beneath the bottom rope, having typically never performed a suicide dive before.

That was awkward. Isla did no offense as Xia went to grab her off the ground, but Xia backed off and just looked at her. Then Xia no sells a punch to the midsection. ???

Oddly enough, suitcase luggage being delivered ring side isn’t the strangest thing I’ve seen in this match.

So they’re props for a mid-match promo from Nina meant to distract Xia. Distracted Xia turns around and eats an awkwardly slow kick to the neck, which she awkwardly sells, before Isla wins with a... back body drop?? What a finish :/

Highlight: That fleeting moment where Isla entertained me

---

Smackdown:

Sasha gets to kick off the show? That’s a first.

Saw someone today say that Sasha only works as a babyface if she’s an underdog or if she’s generally more of a “fun” character. Said there was no positive energy around her as a babyface right now. Honestly her character sucks.

Also saw someone claim Carmella was a better version of Sasha and I’m not disagreeing with that sentiment. They should probably be on different brands in their current characters.

“How fast can I make Carmella cry” Sasha sweetie, you are the last person that should be mentioning making someone cry.

God she even has that stamp. Why is this girl not a heel? What the hell are wwe doing pushing Charlotte and Sasha as babyfaces? They gonna try to turn Becky heel again if she comes back before crowds return? Imagine a world where Charlotte and Sasha are babyfaces while Bayley and Becky are running around as heels. oof. 75% of the way there.

Carmella is great, truly. One of the best promos in the women’s division, probably in my top 3 tbh. Glad to see her relevant in the spotlight once again.

They really are 2 sides of the same damn coin.

Sasha shouldn’t need Bayley to prop her up anymore. Enough of that well. It’s bone dry.

To be honest, it does still feel like Bayley’s show; it does still feel like she runs things, and that’s a testament to not only her booking and her massive success over the past year, but also to how she carries herself and how far her character has come. She’s absolutely on par with Becky and Charlotte now imo (which is why I wanted her to win the Royal Rumble and potentially main event night one of WrestleMania, but I digress) she’s beyond the need of having a title to be the main attraction. I never thought the 3 of them would all surpass Sasha in accolades, star power, and promo skills... but here we are.

Bayley back there talking shit about Bianca rofl.

Omg that captain thing was great. Bayley is creative and fun, and knows how to keep herself from becoming stagnant or dull. Points to Bayley.

Oh Bianca kept those insults from last week’s online exclusive. I love when wwe tests shit in online exclusives, sees the reaction, and then has the talent run that same promo/interview on tv the next week. This happens constantly. Love it.

Friggin love Bianca’s shirt. wwe should’ve printed out a ton of them. I would’ve copped the coin for it.

Girl has legit receipts rofl alright.

Called Nattie the boat. Subtly hyping up her coworkers. Solid.

Lmao Bianca ran Bayley off with her receipts. This is fun. This is a fun feud.

“I’m gonna beat the disrespect out of Sasha,” that’s a good line.

See Carmella has been doing that cackle long before Sasha started it up, and she’s better at it too. Sasha just needs to change things.

Why is Carmella calling Reggie ‘Tommy’? Is this like a dig at his name not mattering or was that a screw up? Couldn’t have been a screw up, she would’ve improvised. Do I have his name wrong? Am I the dumb one???

I need to start watching Raw Talk and Talking Smack. They won’t be a part of these “reviews” (ramblings) but still. I feel like I’m missing out on a lot of fun.

So I know this partnership between Nattie and Billie Kay is super temporary, but I still find it curious.

Okay so Liv tags in Ruby, runs to her, and Ruby sweeps up Liv into a wheelbarrow before Liv rolls through and trips Ruby, driving her into Billie Kay’s midsection. I’m gonna be honest guys, stuff like that is cool to see, but you could’ve literally just speared Billie Kay and saved everyone a ton of time and effort. Work smarter not cooler. Maybe situationally that potentially wouldn’t be terrible, but that was terrible tonight.

“Natalya probably the most powerful in this matchup” lol SIR. Natalya is probably the most powerful in the entire main roster, and only Bianca could be a contradiction. Curious to know which one is stronger, pound for pound and in general.

...Is Ruby okay? I’m concerned. She goes to give Billie Kay a Riott kick before Liv even gets her part of their combo finisher in, and then after she delivers her Riott kick, she crawls over to Natalya’s corner. Was Natalya not in place for a spot or something? Is Ruby on 4 shots of espresso too many??

This match was serviceable. Obviously it’s meant to merely advance Billie Kay’s storyline, so.

*Mario Lopez weighs in on Sasha vs Carmella* I’m good thnx.

Was... was that sheet real? Does Carmella actually dance behind a real sheet that drops down for her to walk down the ramp??

Man I gotta hear Sasha’s awful remix twice tonight, shame.

Lol how is Carmella being a WrestleMania battle royal winner more impressive/important than her being a champion for like 100 fucking days??? She has wins over Asuka, Becky, and Charlotte. THAT is more impressive than winning that stupid battle royal.

I guess I can see why Sasha being Snoop Dogg’s cousin is more important than some of her previous accolades, but jfc Carmella resume to casual viewers is dumb.

Someone in the audience had their camera pointed up to a ceiling fan and you know what? Points to that person.

I like the countering of each others’ submissions. Both scouted their opponent well.

Carmella will always be such a natural trash talker with a snappy attitude in the ring. I’m not saying her current gimmick is bad, but the trash talking princess of Staten Island will always live inside of her.

Minor petpeeve: I dislike when wwe cuts to commercial during a 10 count.

Sasha was not manipulated into tonight’s match, nor was her hand forced. Her ego spoke for itself.

Sasha has really graceful footing. She reminds me of a cat.

“Banks might have a dislocated shoulder after that,” “and if that’s the case, there’s no way Sasha can lock in the bank statement,” fun fact: Sasha went into her elimination chamber match in 2019 with a fucked up shoulder. She also ended that match the victor by locking in a modified bank statement using one arm and a bent leg. It was creative, it was cool, and it worked.

History tells me that when Carmella starts letting her frustration in a match show, she will lose rather soon after. That’s where we’re at.

“vintage Sasha” SHE’S 28 YEARS OLD WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ON ABOUT

Peep that Sasha slid herself back so Carmella could grab her as she climbed up the turnbuckles. Knows her spot.

Don’t do a jackknife cover on Carmella, you’re setting yourself up for the code of silence so damn easily.

Good transition into the bank statement though.

Good progression into a dq by Sasha as well.

OH SHIT Carmella just broke a fucking bottle of champagne over Sasha’s back. Is that gimmicked? Holy hell. It has to be right? That’s why it was a different color??

What a sound effect, oof. Oh Sasha’s selling that real well.

Lmao Carmella goes over and pours herself a glass, says “that’s good, really good,” before shaking the bottle all over commentary and Sasha. Carmella’s great at every character she plays, lesbireal.

Carmella needs to hop on down to nxt and teach those women how to trash talk in a match without fucking up. She’s fantastic.

Wow here’s Greg to FINALLY announce the winner. Yikes announcer, yikes.

This was fun.

Highlight: Carmella in general was fantastic tonight

---

*Smackdown easily shined the brightest. Everything was vastly entertaining and women dominated throughout the entire show. Loving the progression of everyone’s characters sans Sasha, but her match with Carmella was fun nonetheless.

#wwe #issa review #feel free to ignore these #cuz who tf cares lesbihonest #today's props goes to:#carmella

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