#them. and give a vauge understanding of what they mean to the person hearing those labels

[girlboyburger]

Its-using animals club!

Alas i feel your pain, especially when someone's go-to response is "isn't using it/its dehumanizing?"

right. like. it doesn't matter if you think it's dehumanizing. it's what i want to be called, and like my name, you'll call me by it / its or we will not be having further conversation.

to me, personally, that's like. kind of a huge part of the appeal? full respect to those living in the "it can be a moment, it can be the mountains or the sunset" because, me too! but also a massive appeal to it / its is i can easily sum my gender up as some kinda boygirlthing. it/its he/she. like an animal you don't know the gender of.

[j-reau]

There’s something I want to talk about that’s been sitting in my head for a few days now. I kept telling myself not to talk about because tumblr struggles with the line between feelings and drama, between change or growth and confrontation and vauging.

That’s not what this post is for me. It’s not drama or a vague post. It’s trying to work through how I feel, trying to talk to the community at large about stuff I think we can do better, or at least stuff I want for me and for my friends and writing partners. 

I think somewhere along the way, in its inability to wrestle with grey areas, tumblr as a whole lost the middle ground between self care and hurting others, and in doing so turned communication into confrontation. I’ll be clear about something to start this off; you don’t owe strangers on the internet anything. You don’t owe someone an explanation as to why you don’t follow them. You don’t owe a mutual an explanation as to why you write with someone else more or where your muse goes that day. You don’t owe anyone your time. You don’t owe anyone your mental health. Curating a safe space is important. Creating boundaries is healthy whether they’re for you or for someone else. I believe all of that to be true and I think that it’s important that on tumblr we absolve some people of the pressure put on them by themselves. I was once stalked by someone who I had never once talked to on this website who demanded to know why I wouldn’t write with them. I did not owe them explanation. Not for why I didn’t follow them and certainly not for why I eventually blocked them. And once they messaged me over and over from different accounts, my boundaries had been crossed and I felt very uncomfortable. So I understand the importance of making sure people know that that kind of pressure is fucked up. Because of my decision not to follow them, that person posted at length about how I was an elitist, unfriendly, etc. They even threatened self harm and guilt baited. And it is instances like that where I think it’s important that we make clear over and over and over that you don’t owe people an explanation. 

With all of that said, I think somewhere along the way we started applying all of those posts about how to deal with toxic people and strangers and started applying them to our friends. And that’s where things get uncomfortable for me and worth talking about for me. So I guess that’s what I want to do. Because to me, you absolutely owe your friends some communication. You owe your friends a reason. Even if it’s as simple as “hey I think I need some space, please don’t contact me for a while.” Relationships come and go and on a website like tumblr we get very close to some people fast, or we talk a lot and share a lot, not everyone is going to click. Not everyone is going to jive and that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with that. But in relationships, communication is a crucial and important part of adult hood. Ignoring problems isn’t adult. Failing to communicate isn’t mature or conflict free. My best and closest friends are the people with which I can communicate. And in some relationships you’ll learn that your communication styles don’t match. And that’s okay too. But communication is important to any friendship, partnership, etc. Something as simple as “hey can we not talk about that? It makes me uncomfortable.” Something as simple as “will you do me a favor and blacklist your posts about _____ because seeing them makes me anxious.” Or even communicating needs for validation like “I’m feeling really sad and anxious today. It’s nothing you’re doing but could you give me a little reassurance?” Or “hey I’ve been busy this week. It’s not you but I need some space away from discord.” Communications don’t have to be arguments. They don’t have to be confrontations. They’re just expressing a feeling and allowing someone else to then accept the boundary or need you express and meet it, ask questions if they need to or whatever it may be. Like for example, “sure I can give you space. Do you want to just hit me up when you feel better or should I reach out in a few days?” 

I think maybe part of it is about how we place value on “friendships” and on partnerships writing on tumblr. And maybe that’s where some of us differ and I also think is an important thing that should be communicated. For me, I write with hundreds of people. I love writing with people. I love having tons of partners and writing with any of my mutuals who want to. When it comes to writing and people who I have writing partnerships with, my communication style is pretty straight forward. And it starts from jump, communicating if we want to ship or not, communicating what kinds of plots we like. And then later when someone has to say “hey can we drop this thread and start a new one?” Or “Sorry I vanished for a month do you still want to write this?” All of those things are communications and to me, come with trust that you will be honest and receive the other person in good faith. of course, in hundreds of people that doesn’t always happen. Sometimes it doesn’t go well, and that’s fine. These are writing partners and while my communication style will always be the same and be as honest and straightforward as I can give it, it may not mesh with someone else’s. But then there are friends -- good friends. And by good friends I mean the people you talk to frequently. The people you talk to about how you feel, about what’s going on in your life, about your insecurities or whatever it may be. The people you write with frequently or have built a relationship with, the people you tell with your words that you love or that mean a lot to you. Maybe some people on tumblr use words like that lightly. I don’t know. But for me those are meaningful things and the people I consider good friends are not the same as strangers and are not the same as casual writing partners. 

Something is exchanged when we RP. I talked about this in my last post. I talked about how it’s not “just tumblr RP” how there are feelings and intimacy that is personal and terrifying in writing with people and sharing your creative work with them and opening yourself up to rejection and insecurity. When you RP, when you talk a lot, when you become friends with someone even if it’s on the internet, just as in real life, you’re exchanging trust. You are opening yourself up to vulnerability in expressing your feelings, in sharing your world with someone and they are doing the same by accepting that, caring for that, sharing their own, etc. To me, once you hit the point of having exchanged trust with someone, that’s when you owe communication of some kind. It can be as small as “hey I can’t talk today” and as big as “this thing you did yesterday hurt my feelings.” But it’s so important to do it. That’s important for a number of reasons. It’s important because maybe there is a misunderstanding that can be cleared up. It’s important because maybe that other person may not even know they hurt you and could apologize. It’s important because vocalizing your own feelings is an adult point of growth for you. And a number of other things. 

And I GET IT. Trust me, I do. Communicating is uncomfortable. What about how anxious it makes you? What about how you feel panicked and sweaty and your heart races and you worry that it won’t be well received. Trust me, we all have been there. It happens to everyone and it fucking sucks. But the only way that gets better is with practice. I can already hear the tumblr mentality that says “you shouldn’t have to feel that way if you don’t want to,” and there’s some truth to that. But any therapist will tell you that communication is the key to coming to the other side of that and that the more you do it, the better it’ll be, the easier it’ll feel. Having been in several relationships with people that projected their feelings onto me or held me accountable for their happiness, learning to communicate boundaries, learning to communicate feelings versus intention and all of that were huge for me. This isn’t something I popped out of the womb understanding. It’s something I’ll surely fail at a thousand times. But it’s definitely something important to me to learn. And I think it’s something tumblr can benefit from. Because while “let people block you” is an important mentality for strangers, for abusers, for toxicity, etc it’s not a good mentality for friendships and relationships. Ghosting your friends is really hurtful. Cutting people who mean something to you out with no communication or explanation causes a snowball of bad feeling and anxiety in allowing you to have closure on your terms and the other party to have none. Expecting people to handle hurt and confusion and sadness in private without ever talking about it to anyone is really fucking isolating. Tumblr mentality likes to push that we should be able to axe people without consequence, that they should not ever wonder why, that they can not talk about it to anyone else, or express their sadness. But isolating people in their feelings isn’t healthy and it isn’t adult. There’s a lot of hurt that could be avoided on this website by people learning to communicate and by accepting that sometimes conversations have to be had, even if we don’t like it. Or at the very least, taking ownership for the fact that if we don’t want to have a conversation, that that is on us and not on the other person for feeling confused and not knowing what happened.

So I guess where I’m at here is that I just wanted to talk about that area, and open the floor a little to remind people about communicating. And what I mean when I say friends vs. strangers vs. partners is that I think we also need to be honest with each other and ourselves about who our friends are. Because once you open that trust with someone, there’s responsibility there with what you do with that trust. So be aware of where you open that trust. Be aware of what you say and how you treat people. You don’t have to be best friends with everyone you run across on the internet. I certainly am not. Even people I love writing with may not be my close friends, but I make sure that those are people that I’m not being vulnerable with and sharing feelings about things with and expressing how important they are to me. They are of course still important, but it’s different. Don’t fake friendship with people. Don’t love people into the safety and security of trust and communication that you’re not willing to have. It’s okay if communication isn’t your thing, but understanding that and understanding how you treat people because of it is important. Because communication is important. To friendship, to partnerships, hell even to relationships with coworkers and family members. As a community, I think it’s really important that we encourage being more communicative, and that communication isn’t conflict, and that sometimes having a quick conversation about something where both parties get closure or can say their piece or clear things up is the absolute best way to handle things. 

[angrylizardjacket]

Run to Paradise {Nikki Sixx} Part 34

34. it’s time we danced with the truth

Summary: lola and the band go to rehab, and lola has to confront her past, her fears, and her reality.

Warnings: discussions of drug and alcohol abuse and rehab, also angst

ragtag bunch of misfits: @starlalove @toofasttofallinlove @xrosegoldwolfx @obsessivesky @lovehelpmewrite @marvelismylifffe @lilytalebi @glitterdreamsz @freddiessmallnipples @crazysaladchopshop @dramatique-moi @calspixie @aryssav @catsoo12 @sweetshutter @silvertonguedserpent @shamelessobsessions @lavenderbones22 @keepcalm-and-beyou @scarecrowmax @nicholeh7 @unknownoblivion @sighsophiia @fruitinthebottom @misscharlottelee @local-troubled-writer  @redlipscrystalskies14 @kaitieskidmore1 @the-specific-oceans

{ MASTERLIST }

"I want you to picture your addiction sitting in that empty chair across from you."

Lola, who'd just come out of a week long detox, and had finally stopped feeling like death warmed up, stared at the empty chair in the unbareably beige office of the rehabilitation center's therapist.

"Can I get some water?" Lola rasped, craving a cigarette and knowing she wouldn't get one. The therapist, an aging woman a kind smile and a clinical stare, obligingly passed her a bottle of water. Lola really did want to take this whole thing seriously, but picturing her addiction as a person sitting across from her made her feel like an idiot. There was no-one there. No-one else had made her do any of this, why should she try and blame someone who doesn't even exist.

"At least you've acknowledged that this is self-driven, that's good, that's very good; self awareness is key. You are in control of you life, Lola," the therapist's voice is sweet, and Lola can't help but scoff.

"I wish I was less aware of myself, that's why I do all this shit," she snorted, and it's meant as a joke, but it's too honest by half, and the therapist frowns.

"Is that why you don't want to picture your addiction? Are you afraid to picture yourself?"

Lola knows she's not in the best shape, currently eight weeks pregnant and terrified of what to make of it, dead sober - pun intended - for the second time in six months, painfully aware of every terrible decision that has lead her to this exact seat.

"What do you see in that seat, Lola?"

"Nothing," Lola says flatly, and takes a long sip of water. The therapist sighs deeply, and Lola scrunches her eyes closed for a moment, forcing herself to play along, "I see myself."

"What does she look like?"

"Like me," with an implied eyeroll and obviously, Lola sits a little lower in her chair, trying desperately to ignore her growing nausea. She takes another drink.

"Like you now, or does she look like a different version of you?" The therapist asks, and Lola hears the scratch of a pen against paper. Lola takes a deep breath, another drink, and stares at the empty chair. If Nikki were here, he'd roll his eyes and make some sort of snide comment, and Lola would laugh, and her discomfort would ease. Maybe that's why they're in seperate facilities.

Except when she looks, when she really tries to see something, she can't see just one version of herself. She sees the night she was drugged while out with Vince and Razzle, sees herself that night, weak and crying to Nikki, making a vow to try and get better but not sticking to it. She sees herself chain smoking in Tommy's dressing room the night she tells him she loves him, so afraid of the pyrotechnics in the show that she tries to escape it by drinking, by letting herself focus on anything else. She sees herself, fully dressed in a hotel swimming pool, unsure of how she got there, halfway through a bottle of vodka, hoping she'll forget how and why she's telling Mick about her scars.

She sees a kid in a Queen crop top, asking for her first taste of alcohol instead of explaining, when Nadine looks at the scars on her back with concern.

"Younger me, I guess," Lola's voice is soft.

It had been escapism without having to go anywhere, because Lola was never using to escape her reality as much as she was escaping herself.

"What's she saying to you?"

"That it's easy," Lola doesn't realise there's tears in her eyes until they start to spill. She's looking at herself, laying on the pavement in her own sick, and blood from her broken nose, as the paramedics are hauling her into an ambulance, and she can't remember how she got there, which kind of makes it worth it, even if she's dying. In her memory, she's smiling, "it's easier than anything else in the world." Lola's voice cracks.

"Why are you here, Lola?" The therapist asks gently, and Lola's lip trembles.

"I keep hurting the people I love," she admits. Her voice catches in her throat and she has to look away from the chair. She thinks she's going to be sick, and its mostly the pregnancy induced nausea, but part of it is the painful self-awareness.

"I need to go-"

"Lola -!"

"Or I'm going to throw up on your nice carpet," Lola snaps, getting to her feet, stumbling from the chair, from the room, out to the nearest bathroom. The therapist calls to her again, but at least she doesn't try and stop her. Lola hates it here.

The facility is somewhere in Washington state, with more medical equipment than a rehab center is usually known for, but the patients here need extra medical attention, like Lola and her pregnancy. They take care of her, give her everything she needs, make sure she's eating healthy and drinking enough water and exercising, with daily therapy sessions, and weekly group therapy that she's kind of coming to dread.

One of the girls in the facility, another one of the patients, remembers Lola, but Lola doesn't remember her. She'd spent the night with Lola and Tommy in New York, and she won't stop apologising, even when Lola tells her she has nothing to apologise for.

"It was one night, it's okay, it happens to the best of us -" Lola brushes her off, but the woman is still apologising, almost crying.

"I smashed a bottle over your head, I tried, oh Lola, I think I tried to glass you, I was in such a bad place, I'm so sorry -"

Lola doesn't even vaugely remember what she's aluding to, but it also definitely sounds like something that would happen to her. All she can do is say that it's okay, and pretend like she cares. She's doing that a lot lately, pretending like she feels remorse. She'd probably need to feel guilt over the things she's done to feel remorse, but seeing as how she barely remembers her worst offenses, she can't bring herself to feel remorse for them. But her therapist ends up catching on.

"You told me you're here because you keep hurting the people you love," the therapist says with a level patience, "so if you're not sorry for the things you've done to the people you don't remember, would you change to stop hurting the people you love?"

"For them, I would," Lola agrees easily, which surprises her therapist with it's certainty. And then, unprompted, "but if they don't want me when we're all sober, that's - dude that's the nightmare scenario." She laughs, but it's devoid of humour, and her gaze is glassy as she contemplates. There's a lot of fears that Lola had been running from, that she's terrified to voice, and it's all she can do nowadays to distract herself from the reality of her biggest fear growing inside of her.

"Do you love them because of the drugs and alcohol?"

Lola falters, shaking her head quickly.

"And Nikki, you've told me you've loved him since..." the therapist checks her notes, "since you were fifteen; was it because of addiction back then?" Again, Lola shakes her head, and the therapist asks, "then why do you love him?"

It takes Lola a long time to finally find the words for her feelings, the things she's known for years but never been able to voice.

"He never gives up; he's never given up on me, and I love him for that, but it's... it's more than that, of course it's more than that. He's the most talented man I've ever known, and I mean no disrespect to the rest of the band, but Nikki... his mind is unparrallelled, and I'm always in awe of him. I really mean that; the music that lives in his head, the ideas and stories and everything, I've never in my life heard anything like it."

"I didn't ask what you love about him, I asked why," the therapist says quietly, and Lola's eyes go wide and uncertain, and she falls into a contemplative silence. When she finally speaks, it's hesitant, it's quiet, it's so unlike herself.

"Because..." she pauses, looking at her hands, "because he's the only person in the world who understands me, honestly,  like really understands me," she fidgets, pushing back her cuticles with her nails, "I miss him," she adds, a quiet aside, and bites her lip, but the therapist knows to keep quiet, that Lola's not done, "I love him because he's the soft place I land when I fall, every time," she hesitates, a smirk tugging at the edge of her lips, "which I know is sappy as fuck, but despite everything, he still loves me, he still catches me. He's my home, you know?" She nods, bringing her hand to her mouth to chew on her thumb nail, finally looking at the therapist, "he's my home."

"Will those feelings change when you're both together and sober, do you think?"

"My feelings won't change," Lola says, specifically, and the therapist gives a gentle smile.

"I'm going to play you something," she says, and Lola watches as she pulls a cassette tape out of her desk drawer, along with a small cassette player, "you're aware that I record all of our sessions," the therapist reminds her, and Lola nods, chewing her thumb nail, intrigued, "well I recieved this from the facility that's been treating the band -"

"They're together?" Lola asks, eyes wide, incredulous, as if almost relieved, "are they okay?" And the therapist seems pleased that that's her first reaction, her first question, and reassures Lola that they're fine.

"I'm worried about her, of course I'm worried about her, I miss the fuck out of her, the rest of us are here, she should be too -" Nikki's voice comes filtering out of the cassette player, and Lola almost bursts into tears at the sound of it. The unfamiliar voice that joins his must be his therapist.

"She's in a medically-focused facility that's giving her special care and attention -"

"Because of the baby," Nikki sounds like he suddenly understands, and there's a sudden knife-twist of guilt in Lola's chest, but she stays silent, "I just don't want her to be alone through that, family's always kind of terrified us, so I don't want her going through that shit alone." Tears are welling in Lola's eyes, only made worse when Nikki admits; "I'm just kind of fucked, because what happens when we both get out of here and she realises I'm just the piece of shit who ruined her life -"

"You didn't," Lola sniffles, cutting in even though she knows he can't hear her, but thankfully, the therapist gently tells him that he didn't. Nikki tries to protest, but the therapist cuts him off quickly, won't let him dwell in that sort of negativity, and instead asks why he loves Lola, just like her therapist had asked her only minutes ago.

Nikki is quiet.

"Like, the real answer?" He sounds hesitant, too honest and too raw, and the therapist prompts him with gentle affirmation, "I could say anything; you wouldn't know if I was makin' shit up."

"Why would you lie? Who would that help?"

"The real answer... I don't like talking about that shit with people I barely know. That's my shit."

"Nikki, you don't have to say anything you don't want to."

Nikki's silent for a very long time, and there's the sound of shifting, like he's trying to get more comfortable, and then he clears his throat.

"She puts up with our shit better than anyone else," but his heart's not in it, "even after all these years, she still loves all of us bastards, and..." he sighs, but his voice turns soft and gentle, "and she makes me feel safe, okay?" Finally, he sounds honest, and sounds like he's mad about being so honest, "when I'm with her, I feel safe being myself, no bullshit, no stunts, no fear, just... it's just us, and nothing else matters. And I'm fucked if she doesn't want me after everything, but I wouldn't blame her, fuck, after everything she's gone through I wouldn't blame her one bit."

"You're his home too," the therapist tells Lola, who's covering her mouth with one hand, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Does he... does he know I'm hearing this?" She asks, choking on the words. The therapist nods.

"Once he'd said it, and his own therapist suggested sending the tape for you to hear, he seemed more than accommodating -"

"I need him to hear what I said too, I need him to know- I need him to know," she was sobbing, though the guilt from his earlier words, and she hears herself babbling, "but there's - oh fuck - there's only one problem, and you can't - you can not - send this part, please. Turn the recorder off, please." And the therapist sits up straight, on alert as she hesitantly turns off the recording device on her desk, and Lola's trembling hands find her stomach.

"Lola, what's wrong?"

"I love Nikki so much," Lola's adament, "but the baby's not his."

[hypexion]

Can You Hear Me? is an episode about fears, but it’s not a scary episode. It’s more of an episode where events happen, and we learn more about the characters.

This post comes with a content warning for discussion of suicide and depression, due to the nature of one the scenes in the episode.

So it’s time for the obligatory spooky episode of the series, except in the end Can You Hear Me? is only scary for the characters. Zellim is a bit unnerving while he’s slinking around in the dark and popping off his fingers, but he’s also basically a guy who is slightly weird. And while the monsters stalking Tahira in 1380 Aleppo have potential, the episode immediately breaks the important rule of “don’t show the monster“ and so the “Chagaskas“ are immediately reduced to being generic monsters. Alas.

Can You Hear Me? aslo does the whole thing where the Doctor goes “oh no it’s the legendary guy“, except this is the first ever mention of the legendary guy Zellim. It’s one of those things that never really works, since if the audience doesn’t know who your legendary guy is, they don’t know how to react. As villains go, Zellim is at least smart, and manages to bamboozle the Doctor into freeing his buddy, who’s never used onscreen name is Rakaya. It turns out that both of them are totally evil, and Rakaya even summons some fancy exposition to explain how badly the Doctor screwed up. It’s a bit like The Pandorica Opens, except with the Doctor’s Doctorness actually being used against her instead of there being a weird reversal. Sadly, for all their spookiness, Zellim and Rakaya are defeated incredibly quickly. They don’t even do anything after Rakaya escapes other than walk along a road and bother some people.

While the villians might end up being a letdown, Can You Hear Me? does have some interesting scenes in the form of the various nightmares the characters experience. Minus the Doctor, who’s slot is wasted on pointless arc stuff. It’s not like she’s suffered from any major traumatic events recently, like discovering a new forbidden Doctor or having her home destroyed again. Truly the worst thing for the Doctor is a child standing on a rock. Not all the companions she thinks she let down, or the time she spent a few billion years punching through a wall. However, even if the Doctor’s segment is a let down, the rest of Team TARDIS actually has stuff happening.

Graham’s nightmare the most straightfoward and obvious of the bunch. He’s worried about his cancer returning. He still feels guilty about Grace’s death. It’s simple, but it works, because these are the sort of things people will worry about. While Graham might have found some sort of closure, he’s still effected by these things, especially given how they are connected. The only problem is how this is handled in the denouncement - where the Doctor suddenly forgets to be ceaselessly optimistic and just sort of... ejects herself from the conversation. It’s just so grimacingly awful. The Doctor understands loss, and even if Time Lords don’t get cancer, she could still try to mumble out something vaugely positive in Graham’s direction rather than do what she actually did. I’d even say it’s a little out of character, because my take is that Thirteen has a pretty strong aversion to confronting her own inner negativity, to the point where she forces herself to be overty positive whenever possible.

Ryan’s nightmarescape is a tad more estoric, and deals with both his fear of the future, and his guilt at missing his friend’s lives. Dream Tibo is quick to accuss Ryan of not being around, even as the world ended. I think this scene is actually a little more subtle than it first appears, once you factor in Ryan’s relationship with his father. While the future of Orphan 55 is certainly a factor, it’s worth considering that Ryan’s true fear is betraying his friends in the same way he felt like his father betrayed him.

The scenes most open to interpretation, however, are Yaz’s. While the others are fairly direct in showing the character’s fears, Yaz’s doesn’t provide information in that way. Similarly, while Ryan and Graham talk about their visions, the extra context for Yaz comes in the form of an almost equally cryptic flashback. Using information from other episodes, it’s possible to work out that Yaz ran away from home due to bullying and other harassment, and is almost certainly suffering from some kind of depression, given her general attitude in the flashback. And given the context, it’s quite possible that she was not only depressed, but also suicidal. Yaz is in the middle of nowhere, doesn’t seem to have taken many possessions with her, and simple wants to go “away“. The Sonya in the dream tells her to “Do it right this time“ - and notably, uses “you run“ as a justification. To me, this implies that running away isn’t what Yaz should be “doing right“, but something else.

This provides a signifigant new context for Yaz’s entire character and her actions. Her tendency to try to empathize with various side-characters isn’t just a product of general community-mindedness, but comes from knowing exactly what it means to be alone. Whether it’s a outcast in Stuart England, a blind girl in modern Norway, or a millenia-old Time Lord, Yaz isn’t just trying to be generically friendly - she’s trying to intervene before they end up where she was. It also gives some insight into why the Doctor is “the best person [she’s] ever met“ - the Doctor’s entire thing is to show up and beeline to the nearest person in need of help. And it will explain Yaz’s actions in Resolution, where she refuses to give up on the Doctor.

Overall, Can You Hear Me? is a bit weird. The main plot ends up going a bit all over the place, and it just sort of stops. But there’s also some interesting scenes in here for the companions, which I think are deeper than a lot of people give them credit for. There isn’t quite a consistent quality over the course of the episode, but it does end up on the decent side of things, at least.

[endless-vall]

Not Born, But Made - TCATF fanfic, Chapter Nine - What Kind Of A Leader Will I Be?

Summary: Finally able to kick their plan into motion, Kenna and her allies start their journey. First stop, Fydoria.

Author’s note: Okay, I think from now on, although the recruiting will be present in the story, every chapter will have an additional dimention to it. Flashing out Kenna’s progression, her relationships with her allies, and so on.

With all of her allies on her side, the plot could finally move into motion.

The plan, for now, was to recruit every ruler who was still alive, and kick late Queen Adriana’s original plan into motion.

With an allience between all of the kindoms, they could bring Luther down.

Yes, it sounded like they were in over their head. But the longer you thought about it, the less crazy it seemed.

With Leon Stirling, Gabriel Amarne and Annalyse Adair on her side, reaching those rulers didn’t seem like a dream anymore. It seemed like something they could actually achive.

And the longer Kenna served as their leader, the clearer she saw it.

This is what she was meant for.

“First stop, Fydoria.”

The group was standing in Leon’s tent. A map of the five kingdoms laid unfolded across the table. 

Leon pointed on a certain spot on the map, where Fydoria laid.

“What are we waiting for, then?” Kenna stood by his side. “Lead the way.”

“Fydoria took a hit, too, in Luther’s attack. Luther killed Amanth Drammir, their former king. His son Tevan survived the first attack. I gave him a hand when the first wave attack, so he should’ve been able to escape, and should owe us a favor. But you’d still have a lot of convincing to do, even if he survived his way back to Fydoria.

Fydoria is a great kingdom, a gracious one with a high intellectual value. But their army isn’t much of a strong one, and they already lost once.

Convincing Tevan might raise a challange, although I’m sorry I have no more advice on that matter, right now.” Gabriel gave her a rundown of everything Kenna needed to know, on their way to Fydoria.

Leon left one of his men in charge of the merchenaries while he joined Kenna and her group. That big, bulky one Kenna saw when they first arrived with Jackson and Val to the camp.

They will call on them when time comes, but they can’t be traveling with such a large group. It’ll definitely catch the eye of Luther and his army.

“What about something personal about King Tevan. Any personal details, preference I could use to gain his favor?” Kenna nodded, as the carriage rolled them their way.

“She learns fast.” Leon commented, throwing her and Gabriel a look.

“She sure does.” Gabriel, on the other hand, was giving her a proud smile.

“King Tevan is arrogant. He’s flirty, a hit with the ladies, really. But don’t let that fool you. If he flirts with you it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s fond of you. 

After losing his father... His arrogance balanced, a bit. Gain his favor... And he’ll be loyal to a fault.” Gabriel explained what he knew.

“So... You’re saying I shouldn’t let him flirt with me? Show him I’m serious, and worth it. And if he deems it actually worth it, we’ll have his undying loyalty?” 

“Something like that.” Gabriel nodded.

“Okay. I can definitely do that.” Kenna nodded, partly to herself.

“We’re here.” A voice called from outside the carriage, getting everyone’s attention. Jackson brought the carriage to a stop, and one by one everyone shuffled out of the carriage.

Fydoria’s gates stood in front of them. 

“From here, I’m afraid you’ll have to continue by foot. Fydoria is very cautious of who she lets in these days, I’m sure you understand.” 

“Absolutely.” 

Part of the group made camp outside of Fydoria’s wall. Part of the group went in to gather supplies.

And part of group accompanied Kenna to the Kingdom’s center.

Leon, Gabriel, Annelyse, Withlock and Raydan accompanied Kenna to Fydoria’s castle.

“I’ve sent word for our arrival to King Tevan. I kept it short, and vauge in case anyone caught wind of it before him. He’s expecting us... But he’s not sure what to expect.” Gabriel explained.

“Did you tell him you were coming?” Kenna asked.

“My royal sigil’s ring probably did, but no, I did not sign my name. It would be too dangerous is Luther’s men found that letter.”

“Of course. So he’s probably intrigued by our arrival.” Kenna concluded.

“And Fydoria sure loves solving a riddle.” Raydan commented.

A short walk later, and the guards ushered them into the castle.

“Make yourself comfortable. King Tevan will shortly see you.”

While most of her group sat down patiently, Kenna let herself wander. 

She passed the main hall, and entered a gallery. The doors were open wide, so Kenna guessed she wasn’t intruding. 

Pacing a little, Kenna stood infront a statue of a noble man. The caption bellow read ‘Amanth Drammir’.

So this was the former king. Kenna wondered what kind of a man he was. What kind of a king, a leader.

So far she only knew what kind of a king Luther Nevrakis was (a ruthless one), and Annelyse (gracious, but cunning). She heard about queen Adriana. She lived under her rule. Adriana was wise, compassionate, merciful. 

She let herself wonder what Tevan was going to be like.

“A great work of art, isn’t it?” A man approached her. He was wearing purple noble clothes, and he hit Kenna with an all-too-charming smile. “We comminisioned the best sculpture in the land, back in the time.” He added.

“Yes, it’s beautiful. The detailing on his features looks so real. The artist did a marvelous job.” Kenna agreed, before turning to face the man in front of her.

“King Tevan, I suppose?” She asked, with half a smile.

Tevan offered her a hand, and she placed her hand in his. He bowed down and planted a kiss over the back of her hand, before rising to face her again.

“Ah, I hoped I’d have more time to study you before you figured it out, but I did give it away, didn’t I?” He asked rethorically. He exited the gallery, and Kenna followed him.

“I bet you’re eager to talk to me, or else you wouldn’t have come so far.” He told her. They passed through the main hall, motioning the rest of the group to join them and into his throne room.

“I bet you’re just as eager to hear us out,” Kenna matched his wits. This earned her a surprised look from Tevan, followed by a satiesfied smile.

“I admit I’m intrigued. Gabriel wouldn’t have seeked me if it wasn’t important.” Tevan agreed, and sat across from the group at a table.

Everyone took their seats, leaving Kenna one on the middle. Gabriel sat to her right.

“Let’s talk business.” Tevan leaned his chin over his hands, all ears.

Tevan was the easiest to recruit, so far. He admitted he didn’t have much to contribute at this point, his army wasn’t one of the strongest, and Fydoria took a hard blow from the Nevrakis army, but Tevan wanted Luther out of the picture just as much as they did, and their plan sounded more and more like it might actually work.

Before saying their goodbyes, Tevan planted another kiss on Kenna’s hand. “When we win, my lady, I hope you remember I was one of your first allies.” He told her.

“Of course, Tevan. Thank you for your support.” Kenna batted her eyes at him.

Did she just win against him in his own game? Possibly.

“Bellmere is our next stop. The kingdom of Thronegate.”

“Lead the way.”

[fearfilledvirgil]

Ivity and Anx: part thirteen

Summary: Patton has an internal struggle. Since he is bent on not remidying it himself, Roman gives him a way to solve the problem.

Warnings: abandonment issues, crying, self-depreciating thoughts, lowkey guilt tripping, pondering on thoughts, song writing

Word Count: 2708

Paring: Slowburn Prinxiety

A/N: I love how vauge I can make my summarys, okay? But. This is it. This is where things get interesting. Sort of. Sorry for the long wait again! I now have chapters written and planned out, so there won’t be a long wait again. Enjoy! (Taglist under the cut)

masterlist

Taglist: @rileyfirstname @verymuchanidiot @definentlynotjustanotherlemon @silversmith-91 @kanejandkruge @sander-fander-sides @lovecrazyjennybear @the-incedible-sulk @hexdream18243 @crows-with-hats @monikastec @definenormalifyoucan @i-am-absolute-fandom-trash @applecannibal @cats-with-blogs @bubblycricket @gay-girls-do-it-better @bunnyartie @quietlypondering @elusivefalsehoods @hghrules @royallyanxious @quietwords-loudthoughts @squishynonbinarytwink @sortablue @illogical-anxieties @savingshae @a-fander-named-skittles @thelowlysatsuma @ughthatsprettygay @im-so-infinitesimal @certifiedtrashxx @karmels-stuff @littlelogicstillcounts 

The most practical next step of action was simple. Patton understood that. It was very easy to understand, but for the most idiotic reason, he couldn't. It wasn’t logical at all, but then again, logic was never his department. It was always Logan’s, and Logan was the problem. Not him himself, but he was heavily involved. The real culprit was time and education, although it was bad to blame anyone for the current situation. Patton liked to place blame, whether it be on himself or something else, because then who was right and who was wrong could be clear. In this situation, though, no one was at fault, so maybe that was the very problem.

Another sinking feeling in Patton’s chest made him open his mouth ajar, almost gasping for a breath. The sensation twisted itself into his gut, prompting Patton to screw his eyes shut, clench his jaw, and shake his hand. No, the problem wasn’t that simple. It wasn’t cut and dry. It was Patton, sitting criss cross on the floor of his bedroom in the dark with his phone in his hands, lit up, with his thumb hovering over Logan’s contact.

Patton felt a prick of pressure begin to build behind his eyes, the pressure traveling into his sinuses and making his nostrils flare. He didn’t want to cry, but here he was with his phone screen blurring. It was silly, really. Logan had only been gone for a few months or so, but the contact that the younger had with him tapered off into something nonexistent. The sinking feeling reared its ugly head once again, this time traveling farther into his throat instead of his stomach.

He really needed to get a grip on himself, considering that as he had this thought, his sleeved hand moved to his mouth to cover a sob. Patton was not good with change, nor was he good with people leaving him. The therapists called this “abandonment issues,” but Patton’s negative thoughts just told him he was insufferably clingy. That’s why he had let his and Logan’s texting routine die. He didn’t want to be a bother. Like Patton had thought before the waterworks started, this all could be stopped by sending a simple text. It was currently early morning where Logan was living in his dream collage, so it wouldn’t be a problem. Logan was such an early bird, always sending “Good morning, Patton. Was your sleeping satisfactory?” texts at 8:30 a.m. on the dot. The thought of those texts and the conversations sprung from them made a smile come to Patton’s face.

They would talk about how they slept after that: how many hours, if it was deep sleep or not, and if either had any dreams. Logan never had dreams, but he loved to hear about what crazy dreams Patton had during the night. The younger always loved those conversations, mostly because he loved to baffle the older. Patton thrived off of the confusion, having laugh attacks frequently. When he tried, Logan was absolutely hilarious. That wasn’t even mentioning how endering his fun facts were, nor was that statement saying how adorable Logan got when he was passionate about something. Patton let himself give a bittersweet smile between the heavy breathing that came with crying.

Patton didn’t know why he was reacting in such an extreme way. It wasn’t like he was dead, or like he didn’t have the power to text him at any moment. The problem, though, that was still very present was the fact that it was extremely hard for Patton to reach out first. He felt too clingy when he did that. It was the actual, real problem here. Not Logan, not time and education, not no one being at fault, and not even Patton fully. No, the problem was not talking to Logan anymore, and it was ripping a hole in Patton’s chest. It hurt the younger more than he could imagine because in the end, he knew Logan would leave eventually along with everyone else. Except Roman, apparently.

An incoming text shook Patton out of his mind spiraling down into the deepest, needist part of his mind. He blinked a few times, trying to get the remaining tears to get out of his eyes. At the same time, he furiously wiped the tears away with his sleeve. He sniffed, pulling down the notification window on his Android phone. He and Logan always had that in common, while their friends had iPhones.

Prince Roman: Padre? You good? You didn’t respond and I know how you worry

Pappy Padre Patton: I’m diddly darn dandy!!!!!

Prince Roman: You know I know that 5 exclamation points means a cry for help What is wrong, mi hermano más cercano?

Pappy Padre Patton: Logan and I haven’t talked in a few days

Patton was already feeling a bit lighter, now that he was starting to talk about his issue. Roman knew full well his “abandonment issues” that sprouted from being in the foster system, so he was probably going to pick up on his current conundrum fairly quickly. A small smile presented itself again on Patton’s lips when he did a quick translation of what Roman said in his head. My closest brother. His friend was such a sap, but the younger absolutely loved it.

Prince Roman: Text him!! If you don’t, I’ll give you a reason to text him

At that comment, Patton got very confused very quickly. What was Roman going to do, kick him out of his life? Do something so stupid that even Patton needed help on how to tell him he was wrong? There was so many possibilities and ways that the sentence Roman just sent could go, so Patton decided in about 0.001 seconds that it would be best to ask.

Pappy Padre Patton: What do you mean??

Prince Roman: I’ll write an angsty song and post it Without asking the label

Pappy Padre Patton: Roman!! That could get you into serious trouble! Think about the contract! You already follow it to a T. They are already waiting for a chance to reprimand you so no! Do not!

Prince Roman: I won’t if you talk to Logan

Roman was a dirty, dirty negotiator. He never tried to compromise with people he didn't know, just for the reason that he didn’t have leverage on them yet. He would find what his friend is most worried for him about, then use it to his advantage to get something he wanted. Luckily, the usually chivalrous boy did not use these powers for evil, but only used them to motivate people into doing something that they should be doing. Most of the time, that is.

Pappy Padre Patton: Fiiiiiiiiine You are a dirty negotiator

Prince Roman: You know you love me

Pappy Padre Patton: Te amo hermano always!

Patton smiled softly to himself, silently hoping that he didn’t mess up the translation of saying ‘i love you, brother.’

Prince Roman: That makes me happy Now make me happier by texting your Logan?

Pappy Padre Patton: Ok ok I def will!

And then he didn’t. Roman knew for a fact that his friend didn’t talk to Logan after their conversation, because there was a very specific series of events that happened after the two talk. It would start with Patton sended Roman many exclamation marks, then would turn into an explanation of the punctuation. Usually it would be something cute that Logan said, but sometimes it would be because Patton said something odd himself. Then the younger would go into the conversation in more detail, highlighting the cutest moments and becoming very flustered when Roman would ask questions about his feelings. It was routine, and Patton was not one to stray from routine since he started talking to Logan.

That was why as the sun started to get low in the sky, Roman got his guitar from it’s holder and his writing notebook from his desk. He splayed them out on the floor, sat down, thanked whatever was out there that his moms weren’t home, and began to brainstorm for a song. Brainstorm meant a very specific thing for Roman, as he was finding out. He was sit criss cross on the floor, his elbows on his knees and head in his hands. He would string his hands through his hair, rarely pulling on it when he got upset enough with this odd part of his creative process. He would collect his thoughts, focus on what he was feeling, and then go and do one of two things. The first would be to go through his notebook and see if there was any one liners or small sections of lyrics that he could expand on. If none of these felt correct to do in the moment, then he would ponder some more and write something completely from scratch. Latter options rarely happened.

Roman was feeling frustrated, to say the least. He wanted to talk to someone about anything, but he knew that Patton was off the grid for the moment. Anytime that boy faced a problem with texting someone, he turned off his phone and hid it under his many pillows. Patton was the soul person that he could talk to about these kinds of emotions anymore, considering that Anxiety had completely shut him out. Anxiety was honestly the main reasons for most of these emotions. Roman was sad that he was gone, mad at himself for all that he said to Virgil, and just generally frustrated with the whole situation. It would have been so much easier if he never signed up for the Sarrahs Project, but then he would have missed out on the amazing late night conversations that he and Anxiety had. Now that those were over, there was a empty spot in his chest that was waiting to be filled by confiding in Anx again.

It wasn’t fair that Roman had been lead astray to ridicule Virgil and make him feel like he had to be someone he wasn’t. Then again, Roman felt that way a lot of the time too. That’s why Anx and Ivity worked so well together, but it’s also why it hurt so much to not have each other around anymore. Roman wished that he could tell Virgil all of this, and just unload all of the truth onto him, but he understood that the other wanted distance. It was hard to put the pride that Roman always wore as Princey aside and let Virgil see that Ivity wasn’t a lie. That none of it ever was any kind of fabrication.

Roman breathed deeply, taking his hands out of his hair and looking down at his notebook. With all his feelings and emotions inside sorted, he could now try and sort through the one liners he already had written in his book. Rough, calloused fingers reached out for the leather notebook, ready to search to his heart’s content. He unbound the elastic holding the large and old book together, beginning to search through its yellowing pages for the lyric to make the next Princey single. Most of what he passed used too many masculine pronouns, but he passed those for a reason. Some name-dropped Virgil, and Anxiety, so those were also a line to stay away from. After pages upon pages of searching, Roman finally came to a halt.

“Can you be psychic for me? Please? That would make this easier on both of us.”

As soon as he saw the lyric, a million different words and emotions flooded through his head. Roman stared at the words for several more seconds, trying to process the sudden influx of ideas. It was rare that he had this many ideas at once, and even rarer so that they were all about mostly the same thing. Roman grabbed a water bottle that was sitting nearby, chugging half of the available liquid before grabbing his pencil. Upon further inspection on the page, there was also a few gems like “If you were in my mind, some scary things you would find (yes that rhymes score)” and “If only 2x or 4x (or something x).”

After Roman got all of the lyrics squared away, he put the book down flat in front of him. It was always easier to start out with lyrics, then add a chord progression, then work out the melody. At least, it was to Roman. Some would disagree, but they weren’t the ones writing songs all by themself getting into the Top 20 Hits. Momentary peddiness aside, Roman now had his ‘67 C-O-Classic Gibson guitar resting on his leg. He took a moment to run his left hand up and down the neck, then his right over the face of the body of the guitar. It was his grandfather’s guitar, the one he learned to play on by the same man before he died. The label tried to get him to play a different guitar, a newer one with “better sound,” but he couldn’t give up the sentimental value of this one. Especially with the emotion fueled lyrics of this one, Roman needed a guitar that he knew better than the back of his hand. Roman knew and understood this guitar better than he understood himself, and playing it brought emotions he harbored to the surface for him to handle. This guitar had gotten him through a lot, and it would get him through this night as well.

Roman started out with strumming a few simple chords, changing the order of three different ones, adding a fourth, removing two, and just generally playing around with chords until he found a good sound. Eventually, after he started fiddling with a good picking pattern, he narrowed it down to three combinations. While playing the different options, he sang the “If only” bridge that he wrote into the song. He tested the waters with a few different tunes and combinations for a while. Before he could comprehend it, the sun was set and he had a solid picking pattern and chord progression. He could hear his grandfather saying that technically the chords weren’t actually chords because he wasn’t playing all of the strings. A sentimental smile tugged on Roman’s expression of concentration, but he shook it away quickly in favor of attempting to sing over the song.

Surprisingly, Roman was able to get through the song he just wrote with few complications. He stumbled a few times, and stuttered on the lyrics occasionally, but it was overall a good first try. After, he tried again, making the wobbly parts in singing more and more stable. He was proud of himself for that, as sometimes there could be parts where he couldn’t get down until the fifth or sixth try. Luckily for Roman as of right now, the song which he was mentally calling Physic was an easy one to play and sing. Roman never said that the song he would be posting was a difficult one, but then again, he didn’t realise that it would be this emotionally powered.

As Roman placed his guitar steadily on the ground again, he pondered what the lyrics actually meant. While he attempted to balance himself on numb jelly legs, he went line by line and evaluated what he meant by each. It was clear to him as he grabbed his camera equipment that this song was obviously about Virgil. It was so clear that it was painful. There wasn’t any cleverly masked words or heavy emotions only hinted at in a word or two. This song was putting himself out in the open, bare and stripped of all the fancy editing that the studio does. This song would be a plea for help, a cry for someone to come and tell him that everything will be alright. It was a question, a desperate ask for Virgil to let him explain. If the dark and lovely one didn’t let him after this, then maybe all that time with Anx actually was a waste. And Roman desperately didn’t want it to be.

The Prince set up the camera and it’s microphone quickly and experienced, ready to make the worst–or best–decision of his lifetime.

next part

[cowboypossume]

sdfghj I'm so sorry for coming back to this so late I am living in Tumblr bliss without checking my inbox but a) babe is totally fine I love that!! and my names aru (no a, you were close though!!)

yeah I'm like...halfway ash through the book? Simon snow needs a break but I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR OPINIONS EVEN IF THEY WEREN'T GOOD

AND SORRY FOR NOT RESPONDING TO YOUR DMs I'm really bad at messaging I'll try to get better!!!

hey hey don’t sweat about the dm thing ! the inbox is something i can learn to do :D !!! but ok you and spoilers throughout literally the entire and this is gonna be a lot and unedited (mostly) because BEHZYZTGZYSHSYHZUENEUSBS IM SO U P S E T

undeather the - - - - - - is when the spoilers stop

ok, ok, getting striaght to the point. it’s so horny. it’s so horny. and for W H A T ? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE REASON FOR IT TOBE T H A T HORNY? AND EVEN THEN ALL OF THE SEX STUFF WAS SO V A U G E ? LIKE EVERY TIME SIMON AND BAZ WERE TOGETHER IT TYRNED INTO SEX AND YES OK AS AN ACE I G E T HOW MUCH SEX CAN COME UP, BUT LIKE, ENDYXHZYGSHSYZGE WHAT WAS THAT?? IT WASNT EVEN WELL WRITTEN! IT WAS JUST SIMON BEING LIKE “i want more but it’s not enough” AND LIKE NOT REALLY ELABORATING ?? AND THEN THEYD BE SHARING A CUTE MOMENT THEN *bam* HORNY AGAIN? OK ALSO AS FAR I KNOW RAINBOW ROWELLE IS A CIS HET STRAIGHT WOMEN .. BABE WE DONT NEED THAT MUCH SEX BETWEEN THE MLM RELATIONSHIP??? AND THEN WJEN THEY ACTUALLY KIND OF EVEN HAVE SEX ITS SO V A U G E (AGAIN!) ITS NOT UNTIL SEVERAL PAGES LATER I REALIZED THAT THAT TIME WAS ACTUALLY SEX VS ALL THE TIMES IT WASNT? I DIDNT LIKE IT !!

ok now that i’m done being upset about how fucking vague it was, i also didn’t like how it was used as a metaphor for simon wanting to actually try in a relationship? yes it’s important to try in relationships and compromise and try when you don’t want to, that’s important, obviously, but like ,, you’re allowed to have your own believes about sex. that doesn’t have to be the soul focus of your relationship. baz himself even admits that they “have bigger things to worry about”. there are ways to show growth in a relationship without sex, and even if you do, IT DOESNT NEED TO BE THAT VAUGE?? AND OFTEN? simon felt overwhelmed in those positions and then was like “ok lol i’m done with anxiety and just gonna try now and no more anxiety :)” it felt like to me? and then bam bow horny. ALSO. ITS NOW CANNONICAL SIMON HAS A BLOOD KINK ????

ALSO! THAT SCENE IN THE SEWER WAS BAZ BEING LIKE

“please fucking stop about asking me to drain you. i’m makes me so uncomfortable and scared and stop.”

and simon was like “but it’s hotttttt”. WHAT ?? BABE WE DONT HAVE TIME TO UNPACK ALL OF THAT.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO NEXT POINT: WHY? WHY THE FUCK DID SIMON GROWL??? W H A T?? WHAT THE FUCK?? WHAT THE FUCK WAS HIM G R OW L I N G WHEN HE SPOKE??

and ok something i didn’t fit in before was all the weird ways the kissing scenes were described? i’m from america so maybe it’s like a dialect thing i don’t understand, but constantly hearing “i shove my nose into his face” while they were kissing was so weird?? like shove, similar words i frankly don’t want to remember, we’re used all the time? and for what? hmmm??? what was that?????? i cant express to you how of a fever dream this book was?? but ohohoho i have more to unpack.

penny to me always felt like the token diversity friend when it wasn’t in her point of view (and even then pushing it) and so i didn’t love her character. but!! her and simon’s friendship was realistic. i could get behind that. HOWEVER. THIS BOOK TAKES THAT AWAY. SIMON once is like “give me space” and then she’s just like “ok” and i feel like their friendship never got repaired at the end? i stopped really paying attention because fucking shit i was so tired of the constant sex between baz and simon that i zoned out most of it so maybe it did but ,, i don’t think it did. i’m pretty sure she got with shepard and then he got with baz and then that was the end of the friendship because ✨ooooo we’re dating people✨ thing. which ,, isn’t how it happens??

and while we’re here: i didn’t like the penny and shepard ship but whatever it felt like it was inevitable like female x male loki so i was like “huh disappointed but not surprised” feeling when they kissed. if you like it, cool great (/gen), i didnt and that’s swaggy but, ok, the plot of shepard being engaged to a female demon who i think wants to fuck him in hell only to be resolved in like 2 pages of a monologue so penny and shepard can get together was ?? so WEIRD ??? like what was that ?? how did that develop their relationship? idk it was so weird.

but ok back to simon and penny, i kept reading and reading and reading on so i could maybe get to at least talk again and then,, they didn’t? they just didn’t. they never made up their friendship and i get that you lose friends along your life. believe me i’m the last person you have to drive that point home to. but,,,,, god i hated that their friendship ended. for WHAT REASON DID IT END?? simon said he needed space, penny respected that, got a boyfriend and simon did too, so no longer theyre friends? something i liked about this series was the group dynamic all of the books had. no matter who’s pov it was in you could tell who each character was because it was unqiue. you still could in this book so i’ll give credit where credit’s due. however THIS BOOK WAS LIKE 3 ENTIRELY DIFFERENT STORIES WITH NO CONECTJON REWLLY ?? WHICH IS FINE I JUST ,, didn’t get that in the first two books so ,,,, why is it here ?

and ok something else while i’m criticizing is: i don’t love her writing style. i didn’t like how in book one i got “here’s an introduction to my magical word told through past tense and memories and so hopefully you’re all caught up now” which i was willing to overlook because just because i don’t like the style means it bad. at least this book didn’t do that but idk didn’t love that aspect.

ok back to the three stories: i love agatha being a bisexual goat care taker. that’s it literally she should have been the main character. like deadass i loved her story so much. that’s it that’s all /pos.

ok but! simon finding his family was cool. i liked that he got that. the pacing of the scene where he finds out was a little rushed for me but, then again, based on my writing i can’t really critique on that so … liked it, enough. idk how to elaborate. wasn’t the worst part of this book but doesn’t really sit well with me.

and i’m so confused about simon’s wings. he does want them and constantly brings up his surgery and then all of a sudden ,, doesn’t? i think? the last chapter is so vague and simon mentions being on the fence about it and i understand that we as the reader don’t need to know everything about what the future holds for these characters but also ?? beudhyzhsgsbeysyzb babe he brought it up like all the time and can i please get a solid answer ??

aLSO. WHY DID SIMON AND BAZ BREAKUP ONLY FOR THEM TO GET TOGETHER 5 CHAPTERS LATER?? WHAYDYXYZGWH WHAT WAS THE POINT OF WAYWAYRD SON IF SHE JUST DID THAT???? LIKE WHXGXYVZYZHE YOU MADE THEM STAY TOGETHER WHEN SIMON WAS BEING AN ACTUAL DICK FOR AN ENTIRE BOOK (which i will defend until the day i die those scenes weren’t an OUNCE of how horny this book is), THEY BREAKUP, AND THEN GET TOGETHER AGAIN?? NOT EVEN 100 PAGES AFTER THEY BREAKUP??? SHZGZGZYSGSU W H A T? WHAT? I DONT GET IT? i don’t get it.

i kept waiting for the scene where everything came together and it never came. then the epilogue didn’t clarify anything either.

i don’t know. there’s more probably i just didn’t enjoy this book. i would have given it a 5/10 the first time i read it but the more i think about it the lower that number goes so ,, yea not a good time.

- - - - - -

so! that’s a lot! completely get it if you disagree :D. you’re allowed to like a book even though i don’t. and also i have no energy to edit this so enjoy me screaming about it !

[trueheda]

                     1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY. ya’ll know me, i hate making things serious and sappy but i really did want to get around to writing something more for my one year on this babe because she means so much to me ( and so much more now that i’ve been writing her for a year ). ontari is such a wonderful and complex character, and it’s a shame given the show she was given she was only in there for one season it’s always an honor for me that ya’ll are willing to accomidate me into your lives, rp timelines, and plots ! i’ve honestly adored spending this last year with yall. with so much that’s happened irl in this past year it’s been such a blessing to have a steady place where i felt comfortable and identified to be able to hang out and write creativly, plus the bonus of enjoying my bbies ( that’s you lot ).  and i know i’ve done some pretty shitty shit in this past year. and this is deffiently also a thank you letter to everyone that’s stuck by my side despite everything i’ve done not to deserve it. so this is my personal way of saying THANK YOU for being here, for wanting to write with ontari, for wanting to write with me, thank you for those 2AM movie nights, for the 4AM rush replies because a thread was just addicting, thank you for bringing a smile to my face for introducing me to friends new and old and freinds i wouldnt have been able to make if not for this blog. thank you so much. ya’ll don’t understand how much this means to me. and i dont think you will. so here’s a small little thank you notice for those of you that care:

if you were to LIKE & REBLOG this post ( * yes both ) you’ll be entered to win the following provided to you by YOURS TRUELY examples including ( all my rp blogs legit just look at any of the rp blogs ): a THEME BG + CODE * only if u want a custom code by me ofc it’s up to you, a PROMO SET, a DASH ICON, a MOBILE HEADER and !! an AZGEDA EDIT of your character because how tf would you not want more azgeda around !! 

now that we’ve gotten that out of the way and i’ve given ya’ll a small thanks, i want to give you an even bigger thanks ! and wanted to give a big shout out to my fave babes whom have stuck by my side through a whole lot of shit that is hella undeserved ! but yet you’re still here ! despite it all and i owe you all the world so thank you. so much. 

@murhys - MOON !! love of my life. cas to my dean. actual other half. salt king husband to our salt kingdom. moon you’ve been there for me since day 1 and are probably the only person on this website i’ve never had a disagreement with. you wormed ur skaidad into my baby icekids heart which i thought would be impossible and it’s magic how much i enjoy ur presence really. you’re deff like my other half babe. ultimate husband. ily

@azgona / @braverstars - HANNAH !! b to my v. actual partner in crime when it comes to like anything ! legit we write anything and theres so much perfect chemsitry between the characters that i think we were meant to b babe. like legit anything we do its magic and you really need to have more faith in this community because we need u man. we need you. 

@kiingbuilt - LENEE ( STARS ) !! actual babe. positivity queen lenee. honestly ur so sweet and so perf and idk what you want me to say bc ur awesome in every way ? you put up with me who’s like the dark hole to ur sunshine but like i’m always so greatful i don’t think there could be a better person i’d want to play tari against than you, roan and her have such depth and it’s so wonderful to be able to talk at lengeth about our ice siblings and what could have been like ! ily so much thanks for legt taking care of us all better than what we deserve

@leyosgona / @saviorbuilt - SOCHIE !! my babe sochie waht to i say about you. well lets start with the fact i don’t think i’ve ever become trash for a ship quite as quickly as i became trash for catari like wtf man. i’m going to second that with sayig ur clarke is presh and i love her to death ? and top it all off with the fact hat you legit always put up with me spamming u wit random af things without ur permission and are a okay with it all the time which makes u way too cool. 

@humansympathies - CHARLES !! legit one of these days im sealing u away form ur wife just u wait ( * hamilton an american musical plays in the bg  )  honestly i still need to thank you for making me so goddamned comfortable with being okay to write something i had been so nervous to write before because of the context of th show. you are the reason i was able to come out of my bubble and im so fucking thankful for that sitll am going to add #actualjohnmurphy bc nothing u do can change that

@ginatcnic - LAUREN !! gg lauren ur always around to help me when i need it and i really think i dont deserve you as a friend you’re amazing and always there for me and put up with me ranting @ you about the randomest bullshit and being vauge af about it and whatnot. ilysm babe dont forget ever that you are one of the most important parts of this fandom and we’d be lost without you. 

@foxofthe100 / allofthe100 - BRITT !! things i never expected i would do: ship with britt. things i’m super thankful happened: shipping with britt. not that we needed it to be friends bc w were friends beforei. but i deff think that foxtari has brought us closer and i’m so glad that it did !! you’re such a fun and acomplished person, and your view on things are always so well balanced and lovely to hear ! being who i am i love understanding things and you always put things in prespective. just in time to drop an angst ball on me but yknow. 

@si02built / @rainkiing - CHUCK !! yo you. yes you. i love ya man. like i do love you so much i don’t think you understand how much you’re amazing. you’ve been there for me since day 1 and i know that it dosn’t matter if i havent spoken to you in a day or in a month we’ll jump back into things just as they’ve always been meant to be and i think there’s a sort of treasure in that tat can’t be sahken. i love you man. kisses. take care

@damnleader - NIKKI !! i dont know where to start with you man. i started off as ur biggest fan and now look at us. we’re trash and i love it and you legit need to get ur ass back onto this account so i can yell at you about how presh u are and how much i miss talking to you and ranting and bless. 

@youngcst​ - MOO !! moo. legit i never knew whether to call you that or lois but you know what it don’t matter much now does it. waht i will say however is how thankful i am that we were bros for such a long time, and how much it means to me what nova and tari built toether and their relationship like i sob over our babies so often you don’t even know ! please always keep bringing us babe characters. 

bonus shoutout - @ CONSQUAD because yall put up with my ass for 4 days and if anyone can do that i think they deserve like a gold medal or smth like pls yall are honestly some of the best people keep being you !! @banishhim ( black hole ) / @algaenotwar ( milky way ) / @stellarstolen

bonus bonus shoutout - @ icesquad because AZKRU BEST KRU - some of ya’ll are inactive and need to get ur asses back here just sayin’ @icymenace / @azhaihefa / @aznofi / @azkeyva / @azgedaechoes / @azgada / @aznontu / @komashdaun /  @azenblida / @dubiousloyalty / @challengedloyalty / @shudameika / @aiopgona / @zosimekomazgeda / @wintamnontu / @deathwants / @icebuilt / @icebitxh / @leyosgona / @kiingbuilt / @haihefaroun / @firraun / @rcyalscars / @acrownofice / @youngcst 

i also wanted to make a sort of like FOLLOW FOREVER ? like ? idk how you make a solid one of these but just like all the blogs ? i’m in awe of whenever they come on the dash seemed like a good idea ? like these are all so quality all the time eve if some are inactive i refuse to unfollow just because of the chance they’ll come back, they should be a shoutout bc they are my inspiration to write they make me a better writer every day ! and love the hell out of them: @wolfsouled / @rattledbybullets /  @ragnarsscn / @princeubbe / @belomi / @soldiiermade / @imqetuous / @everyturnanycost / @noximperator / @lionoffrance / @praycd / @redempticnarc / @bloodshedbound / @allvanquisher / @murdocksredemption / @damnmechanic / @leaderbuilt / @casuistic / @headstrongblake / @crimiinalchemiist / @noukru / @starxbcrn / @arroworn / @survivorbuiilt

[submissivelynick]

The Interview | 2/7/19

Tagging: @dommateolopez, @submissivelynick, @miss-sue-sylvester, and @headmaster-shue, with mentions of @jamie-beiste Date: Thursday, February 7th, 2019 Summary: Mateo and Nick go through their exit interview for their trial claim.

Will went through his papers, getting his notebook ready as it became 1pm and he signalled to have Mateo brought in to the room with him and Sue. “Mr. Lopez, please have a seat,” he said, motioning to the chair across from the desk. “Alright, so let’s start simply - how do you feel your last 30 days went?”

“Jesus, William, did you bathe in aftershave today or just fuck the bottle?” Sue rolled her eyes and clicked her pen as the Dom walked in. “Yes, and please, don’t bore us.”

Mateo sat in front of them, hoping he didn’t look as nervous as he felt. His lips pressed together to keep from laughing at the Headmistress’s comment. “Well, Sir and Miss, l believe they went very well. Nick and I have already established a bond as Dom and sub, and I think a few things we discussed during our trial helped solidify that. I can’t speak directly for Nick on this of course, but I think it was confirmation that we are heading down the right path together.”

Will noted, jotting down his notes, “And what were these things that were discussed during your trial? And we are looking for your answers and your opinions on where you both are at. We’ll get his later.”

Sue yawned, a bit over dramatically. “Yes Darling, give us the gory details.”

He let out a soft breath. “A few things come to mind. Particularly his desire to continue scenting with other Dominants, which is within his rules with a few stipulations. Even though I didn’t quite rule in favor of him wanting to do a particular scene for the first time with another Dominant, he accepted it with understanding. It also led to us putting more effort into exploring the other’s likes outside of our own main desires when it comes to kink. I think those realizations helped strengthen our relationship.”

“It’s a safe space Lopez, no need for the vaug-ities. What stipulations. What was the scene. Who was it with. What did you two discuss. What things did you explore. Details are important,” she said, leaning forward because she was genuinely interested. This trail would b a tricky one. A Dom who’s already had a failed claim and a submissive who’s been showing promise, but lacks so much confidence. Not to mention, that this was a graduation on the line for the submissive. She wanted the details, all of them.

He fought the urge to raise an eyebrow. A safe space? Hm. “From what I understand, Sam Evans offered to do a scene with him involving degredation and humiliation, to a more intense degree than Nick has experienced. When he came to me to talk about it, I was hesitant, as he has confidence issues and I was concerned that such behavior, even in the context of a scene, would be detrimental to his mental health. So I suggested that we do a similar scene together first, to make sure it would be something he could handle before doing so with another Dominant. No matter how capable the Dominant might be.”

Will hummed with a nod, enjoying the more specific information now, which would be the most beneficial over all. “And how did that scene with you go? Also, did the scene with Mr. Evans happen and if so, do you believe your work with Nick made it more successful?”

“It has not yet but I believe Nick will be capable of handling it without my presence. I have faith in him to determine if and when he might need to use his safewords, should things get too intense for him.”

“So you had mentioned Mr. Duval’s lack of confidence. How have you been dealing with that and what have you been doing to assist in his gaining of confidence?”

“In addition to him speaking with a therapist, I always try to communicate with him about how he’s doing. Whenever he tries to internalize things, if he feels he’s failed or done something wrong, I encourage him to open up about it and explain why he’s feeling such things. Talking them out usually helps him, and if he internalizes too badly, I’ll put him through a scene, usually something sensory or power exchange related. It helps him get out of the negative train of thought and reminds him that he’s not the horrible person he thinks he is. It helps with his confidence as well, since his submission is something he’s very good at and comes naturally to him.”

Will listened, nodded and took notes as he usually did, listening to Mateo’s answer. “Very interesting. How long did it take the two of you to figure out what would help him through his issues with self confidence?”

He paused for a minute to think, cocking his head. “I think… apologies, I’m trying to recall exactly. There was something he was very upset about, I don’t remember what. It was a while ago. He wasn’t responsive to anything I was saying, and was defying me, so I ordered him over for a punishment. I had him kneel and write lines, something positive and affirming - I apologize that I can’t remember precisely what. But it seemed to help break the chain of negative thoughts, and I think he realized it wasn’t exactly a punishment - just a way to get his mind out of that negative place by reminding him that he isn’t the terrible person he thinks he is. Since then it’s been a bit easier tugging him out of that mindset.”

“Sounds like there’s been a lot of trial and error,” Will agreed with a nod, “It’s good to see you were able to work through these things. Now, tell me Mr. Lopez, what do you feel is different about this claim than your previous one?”

“There has been, but I believe we’ve come to a good place.” Mateo let out a sigh, rubbing his hands on his pants to try and calm himself. He knew this was coming. “I feel much more confident in my role in this claim. My previous one… it felt as though I wasn’t the Dominant at times because I was tentative in demonstrating that outside of scenes for fear I would be resented. This time, especially after our trial, I don’t feel that way. Nick and I have a deeper bond, that I’m extremely sure about. He and I are compatible as Dom and submissive because he understands the decisions I make are always in his best interest, which I don’t believe my previous claim understood.”

“That seems appropriate and understandable,” he agreed. Will hummed in agreement as Mateo spoke, remembering some of the same concerns during his last interview. “So you feel that you and Mr. Duval have been able to connect better and more effectively? What makes you believe Mr. Duval is so much more understanding of your thought process and Dominance?”

“I believe because we started out with a D/s mindset, it’s different. True this is also a romantic claim, however, Nick and I began our relationship as Dom and sub, as well as friends. There was nothing romantic between us for the first half of our knowing each other - it was purely D/s. The romance came after that. I think that secured our roles a bit more clearly in our minds as opposed to my last claim where our roles were… well, in his mind, an afterthought. Nick sees me as his Dominant first and foremost, and he is my submissive first and foremost.”

Hearing the magic words twitched Will’s ears a bit. “So as a romantic and D/s claim, it sounds like you both have  a good understanding of the definition between the two. Has this always been the case? Meaning, has there been a time where there has been a struggle between your D/s side and the romantic side? Perhaps a romantic moment that he may have felt was ‘ruined’ by D/s stepping in?”

Mateo shook his head. “Not with Nick. Things with us have always been based in that D/s mindset. The romance evolved from that, but no. I don’t feel as though there’s been a struggle between us in balancing the two.”

Will nodded, “Alright. Sue, anything else before we send in Mr. Duval?”

“Just a simple thing, describe for me what your think the future will look like for the two of you. Will you work, will he? Will there be another claim? Any slaves? Will you see both of your families? Explain.”

“I intend to study law and become a lawyer. Nick is not sure what he would like to do, but if he would like to work, I won’t stop him. I intend to claim another sub, of which Nick is fully aware. As is Jamie. I won’t keep either of my claims from their families, and I will keep in touch with my sisters. My… my grandmother is no longer in touch with me. And as of now, it looks like we might try to settle in California, though nothing has been decided.”

Sue simply nodded. She was satisfied. “Alright then. Send the submissive in on your way out. Thank you Mr. Lopez”

“Thank you, Headmaster and Headmistress, for your time.” Mateo nodded and got up, heading out and pressing a kiss to Nick’s cheek. “Your turn, my love,” he murmured, squeezing his hand.

Nick let out a shaky breath when he saw Mateo, but he smiled at the kiss. “Thank you, Sir,” he said. He bit his lip and gave his boyfriend a nod before turning and heading into the room with the headmasters. He looked uncertainly around him before stepping into the middle of the room. “Hello, Sir, Miss. Um, may I kneel for this? Or, um-- where do you want me?”

Will watched as the exchange occurred, and Nick walked in. “Take a seat, Mr. Duval,” he explained, motioning to the chair in front of the table, quickly jotting down a few notes. “Alright, let’s start off with the basics, how do you feel your trial went? Please keep in mind that we are looking for specifics about this.”

Nick swallowed and moved over to the chair, his heart pounding in his chest. He was nervous, and he knew it showed, but there was nothing he could do to hide it. He took a deep breath to try to steady himself before he answered. “I think it went well, Sir,” he said, slipping his hands beneath his thighs to keep them from fidgeting. “The rules we came up with when we started helped a lot, I think. I knew what was expected of me in terms of scenes with other people, and it was nice knowing I’d be getting a couple scenes a week with Mr. Mateo, no matter what. I tried hard to represent him well this past month, and I mean… I can’t say for sure how other people saw it, but I think I did a pretty good job of that, Sir?”

Will nodded along, jotting down notes as Nick spoke, taking in the information he was getting. “Well, why don’t you tell us why you think you have represented him well? I’m not interested in what other people saw, I’m interested in how you feel you did this.”

“Yes, Sir,” Nick said, giving a little nod. “I mean, I always try to be a good submissive, so I’m not sure it made much of a difference, but the collar around my neck definitely reminded me that my actions reflected on Mr. Mateo, too. I don’t think there was anything specific that happened where I would have done or said something I shouldn’t if I hadn’t been wearing that collar, but it was still something I thought about. If, um, that makes sense, Sir? And I like that feeling. I like knowing that the things I say and do could come back and reflect one way or the other on Mr. Mateo.”

“Buttchin might want to dance around it, but I’m more of a get to the piont kinda gal. How’s your brain Nick? Still convinced you’re the worst ever and every problem is your fault, or has Mr. Lopez actually helped with your self esteem issues?”

Nick flushed at the headmistress’s commentary about him, but it wasn’t inaccurate. “I think… I still struggle sometimes, Miss,” he replied. “Talking to my therapist helps, and talking to Mr. Mateo does, too. I know he won’t lie to me. If something really is my fault, he’ll tell me. But if he says it’s not, I have to believe him. I don’t know if I’ll ever not have some sort of self-esteem issues, but… he helps. He knows how to talk me down and how to make me see things from a more neutral perspective.”

Sue jotted a few notes but didn’t let anything on. She loved making the students squirm and wonder what she was writing, even if most of the time she was just drawing inappropriate pictures and making a list of new nicknames for Will. So far today she’d come up with “Sir Sings-a-lot and Q-tip,” but she didn’t like either of them and scratched them out as she spoke again. “Glad to hear it, that was getting annoying. So what would you say your relationship with Mr. Lopez is like? Why do you want him to claim you?”

Nick blinked, these questions catching him off guard entirely. He chewed on his lower lip for a couple of seconds while he gathered his thoughts. “Our relationship is very much based in Domination and submission, Miss. I don’t know if we’ve ever really interacted without our marks coming into play in some way. He kind of… completes me. Well, he and Mr. Jamie do, together. And I hope Mr. Jamie eventually joins our claim, but right now, I want Mr. Mateo to be my Dom officially because I really don’t know what I’d do without him. He calms me. He makes me into a better person. I want to spend the rest of my life taking care of him and having him there to take care of me, too.”

“Mmmhmm mmhmm” she hummed, hating the part where these kids would prattle on about being missing puzzle pieces and destiny. “Jamie. Yes. Let’s talk about him It’s clear Mr. Lopez wants a second claim, possibly Jamie. What do you think about that?”

“Mr. Jamie has been a part of our relationship for a long time now, Miss,” Nick said, feeling relatively confident in this topic. He’d known it would be coming, especially with how Jamie had been mentioned in their rules when they’d applied for the trial. “I want Mr. Mateo to claim him, too. Honestly, it felt kind of weird doing a trial claim on my own, because he’s such an important part of our relationship. I’d still want Mr. Mateo to claim me even if Mr. Jamie weren’t in the picture, and I’d be open to exploring a second claim option for Mr. Mateo if things somehow didn’t work out with Mr. Jamie, but… I think all three of us are in agreement about Mr. Mateo claiming us both.”

“And how will that work exactly? Would Jamie be your Dom as well in some ways or on equal footing with you?”

“Well, I mean… legally, he’d be a sub just like me, Miss,” Nick replied, giving a little shrug. “The plan right now is that he’d get to exercise his Dominance in scenes with me on occasion, but Mr. Mateo would be the one with the final say in everything. We all know he’ll officially be a sub just like me, though, Miss, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Now i’m interested in something,” Will said with a cleared throat, “what happens if the second claim isn’t James? What does that change for you in your acceptance of a second claim?”

Nick frowned. “Then something very strange happens between now and then, Sir,” he said, his gut clenching automatically at the thought of being in a claim with anyone else but Mateo and Jamie. “But, if something were to happen, I think Mr. Mateo and I would have to talk it through and figure out what works best for us both. I know he wants two claims, and I’m okay with that, but I’d want there to be a lot of communication between the two of us first and then between all three of us. I know Mr. Mateo would want to make sure I’m comfortable with what was happening with the second claim, and I think we have a really good foundation in open, honest communication that would help us figure that situation out. And it will be good for any other road bumps that life throws our way.”

“Stranger things have happened,” he said simply, jotting a few notes. “So in this life with two claims - regardless of who - do you see yourself and the other claim on the same level? Or do you expect to have something over the other one?”

Nick blinked before shaking his head slowly. “No, Sir,” he replied, before quickly adding, “I mean yes. Yes, we’d be on the same level, but no, I wouldn’t have anything over the other one. With Mr. James, it’s a romantic relationship between all three of us. With another sub… it may be that I only have that romantic connection with Mr. Mateo, but in terms of submission, the other sub and I would be complete equals. I wouldn’t say that the romantic connection gives me anything ‘over’ the other sub, Sir, no.”

Will hummed and nodded, thinking through the boy’s answer. “Alright, back to about your trial claim itself - what did you find during this trial that you believe either you, Mr. Lopez or the two of you still need to work on?”

Nick took a deep breath when he realized they were changing pace again, and he shifted a little in his seat. “The only thing that really comes to mind is working on how we handle our kinks and what happens when we can’t meet the other’s needs entirely. Like… I’m not into pain play as much as Mr. Mateo is, and we’re working on getting me to like it, but I think we might also need to discuss opportunities for him to get those kinds of scenes elsewhere sometimes. If that makes sense, Sir?”

“And how does that make you feel Nick? That you can’t fulfil your Dom’s needs fully? That he seeks outsiders to do what you can’t?” Sue pressed what she was sure was a sore button for Nick, but she wanted to see how he’d react.

Heat rose to Nick’s cheeks and he looked down for a few seconds while he gathered his thoughts. “It… doesn’t really feel great, Miss,” he admitted softly. “We’re compatible in so many ways, and I do wanna learn to like everything he likes, but it’s gonna be a long process and it may not ever happen, really. But I’m trying. And I want him to be happy and fulfilled, and if that has to be with other people sometimes, that’s okay, Miss. I’ll probably have to do that too, sometimes. But we’re honest with each other about our scenes with other people, and that helps with the jealousy some.”

“And are there things that he is trying to be okay with for you? I would encourage you, Mr. Duval, to be careful about making yourself tolerate something for someone else. But it’s good to hear you know and understand your limits.” He agreed, looking to Sue for more questions and the eyeroll he knew was coming.

“Yes, Sir,” Nick replied. “He and I have started exploring humiliation some. It’s something I know I like and he’s unsure about. But we definitely always have safewords, and I’m actually even starting to like some kinds of pain play. I wouldn’t keep doing it if I hated it, but I hope I can start to enjoy even more of it as Mr. Mateo and I work through it together.”

“Alright, well Sue, is there anything else before we bring Mateo back in?”

“Nah, let’s get the two little daisies back together before their petals fall off,” she sighed as she set her notes aside. She prefered shooting from the hip for the last part of the interview.

When both boys were once again sitting in front of her, she made a show of looking them over. Sometimes her gut told her everything she needed to know and if a couple didn’t look right together, she almost never gave her stamp of approval. “Well, Mr. Lopez, I certainly think that Nick is a /better/ match for you than your last submissive. I’m not sure he’s perfect, but neither was the last one. Tell me, why should I put my name on this claim? Why will you two work when so many others failed- yourself included.”

Mateo sat next to Nick, immediately sliding his hand into his submissive’s to squeeze gently, a reassuring smile flashed in his direction. “We will work because we’re both on the same page about it working. We’re both… sure of what we’re getting into. And we both know what the other wants out of our claim and our future.”

Nick felt relief wash over him when he saw Mateo again, and he squeezed his hand back, not letting go for anything. He bit his lip at the question but nodded along as Mateo responded, not wanting to say anything himself unless he was directly spoken to.

Sue glared nearly the whole time Mateo spoke, merely to intimidate him and maybe even confuse the both of them. “Mr. Duval. What would Mateo say is your best quality as a submissive?”

Nick swallowed hard and did his best not to completely shrink down into his chair at Sue’s gaze. Mateo’s hand in his helped. “I, um,” he started before looking at Mateo, as if he could help him out here. What would his Dom say was his best quality as a submissive? His obedience? That felt almost trite to say. He bit his lip again before looking back at the heads. “Maybe my loyalty?” he replied. “He knows I’m his, and he can trust me to act as such. Or— well, he trusts me because he knows I’m honest with him, Miss. I know it’s kind of cheating to say two qualities, but loyalty and honesty, really.”

Sue was more interested in watching Nick’s response than hearing it. Could the sub actually admit something positive about himself, and not just that, but admit that he saw what Mateo saw in him.  She picked up her pen and again scribbled some notes before looking to Will. “Well? Anything to add Shoeleather?”

Mateo tried to ignore how Sue was glaring at him, but he had to admit it made his spine a little like liquid. Still, he squeezed Nick’s hand again, a silent praise for his answer. His gaze turned to the Headmaster, curious for his final words.

Will put his pen down, taking a moment to go over his notes. “I think you both have explained yourselves well and overall, things seem to have gone well and I am optimistic that will continue. Keep in mind - it does need to continue. Whatever happens here does not mean your relationship is perfect and that you can do no better. Though, you both seem to understand that. Congratulations, we will be putting in the paperwork for the legal claim. Additional congratulations to Mr. Duval who will effectively be graduating at the end of the semester. Keep up the good work.”

Nick’s mouth dropped open, and he felt tears spring to his eyes. He had been so stressed over the last couple of days that hearing that his claim had been approved was almost too much relief for him to handle. “Thank you, Sir-- Miss,” he said as he scrambled to his feet, pulling Mateo up with him. He wrapped his Dominant up in a hug, holding onto him as if he’d never get to do this again, even though the exact opposite was the case.

Mateo could hardly believe what he was hearing. He hugged his submissive tightly, scarcely daring to breathe “Thank you… thank you, Headmaster, Headmistress. Thank you,” he breathed, looking at the two of them over Nick’s shoulder.

[foulfurywombat-blog]

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Best place to buy health insurance?

Going to retire but need health insurance for family, only 55""

""Which is the best car insurance in uk, cost wise and service wise.?""

Which is the best car insurance in uk, cost wise and service wise.?""

What's the cheapest car insurance in NY?

I'm 20 (female) with an 1991 Honda and a couple minor infractions, and I'm really looking to get a cheaper insurance plan. What would you recommend? Thanks!!""

""I just received a position where I am given Benefits for the first time, I have questions about Insurance?""

Does what I pay for insurance come out monthly? or every check? what is coinsurance? How do deductibles work? Stupid questions I am sure, but I have never had the option to pick insurance, and I haven't been covered by my parents insurance for at least 7 years. I didn't go to the doctor much when i was covered, so I never learned what my parents had to do.""

What is the cheapest car insurance?

i have a 2005 mazada 6, and im just looking fot the cheapest car insurance in pa. dose anyone know of any?""

Purchasing insurance to cover maternity leave in California?

Is there any sort of insurance you can buy in California so you can get approximately your regular wages during your unpaid maternity leave? I've heard that state disability doesn't pay too much. And how long can you take off? Some women say they've gotten 3 months off but I don't know what I need to do to get that, and still have approximately my regular income coming in. I'm not pregnant yet, so I could buy something without having a pre-existing condition. Thanks!""

Non-custodial parent needs affordable health insurance?

Apparently only custodial parents can apply for CHIPS health insurance. My last job had affordable health insurance for my son, but my new job only has insurance for 800.00 a month. I only make 10.50hr and get less than 40 hrs a week. Can someone please direct me to an insurance plan that I can afford?""

Should I get a full coverage insurance on a rental car?

I have to rent a car for 2 weeks for business. Supposely, the cost should be reimbursed to me by a company after the assingment is done. Not sure if I can truly trust that. But anyway, if I don't get the insurance, it will be $500. But if I get insurance, it is $1200. I am a safe driver and I will be in a rural place. I am trying to convince myself that I don't need it. But then again, I worry about what might happen if accidents occur. The cost of rental car will be reimbursed by a company. But I am not sure if they are actully going to do that in timely manner and my credit card balance is high. I don't want to put extra money charged into my account. My credit card company and auto insurance company (on my own car) told me that they do not have insurance coverage on rental cars. What do you think? Thanks""

If i have no car do i have to pay insurance?

if i have my liscence but no car, but i drive my parents car do i still have to pay insurance""

Homeowner insurance am I right?

So am I right? If I rent-to-own a home but the deed is still in the owners name untill I pay off the house. I cannot get homeowner insurance because the deed is in the owners name? But after I pay the house off I can get homeowner insurance because the deed will be in my name? I am paying the homeowners insurance though and if somthing happends to the house what the insurance will pay is the balance and I get nothing. So I should get renters insurance ??

Car accident happens when the car's insurance is not your name?

If Car accident happens, and the car that you were driving the car's insurance is not your name. If call 911,will you get arrested or what? and will that car insurance company pay for the damage that you did to other car?""

Rental car insurance?

Do I have to get rental car insurance in va from hertZ

""Founders insurance refuses to pay for an accident, how do we get them to pay?

my friend got rear ended and the hit was so severe they bumped into the person in front of them and the car at fault ha founders insurance wont pay they have to cover medical expenses as well as the car being totaled..they refuse to answer their phones or return any calls at all. i looked up the reviews for the company and everyone says they suck...so now my question is now how do we get them to pay for the car and medical expenses its been a week now and nothing

""I got a DUI, will my auto insurance drop me?""

I have AAA, and got a DUI ast year, my insurance hasent gone up yet, but I know it will. Do you think AAA will drop me, since they are such a huge company, and will I have to go get some cheap ol' coverage now? I pay around $125 at the beginning of my policy for the year, then it goes down a little each month, my last payment is around $30, then it starts over again. Ive been w/ them for a few years, w/ a perfect record, until now. The DUI wasnt for alcohol or illegal drugs, it was for prescription medication. I tried a new med, but made the choice to drive also, and this is what I got. Any help?""

Domino's Pizza Delivery Driver- do you need commercial insurance?

I have an interview today for a job at Domino's Pizza to be a delivery driver. My only concern about it is right now I have personal insurance. If I were to get in an accident while delivering a pizza for domino's, would I still be covered? I'd like to hear from actual insurance reps or people who have had experience with this.""

Do you really believe that America has the best healthcare in the world?

Please say why you believe this when all evidence points to the contrary. You talk about health, cost, care, ect, we do not have the best. People in other countries have better. I mean...I listened to sean hannity say that we have the best healthcare and the only evidence he could provide is some vauge story about a politician from another country coming here to get healthcare...that doesn't really qualify as evidence. Especially when the world health organization ranks healthcare, and we're nowhere near number 1. Now this is a fact that I've known for about two years before this debate even flared up. How is misinformation getting so out of hand? Please...tell me why we have the best with 50 million people uninsured. When we pay the most of any country in the world with some of the worst care. When we have some of the most unhealthy people. When insurance companies exempt for preconditions, when healthcare cost is the biggest contributor to our debt, when we pay premiums every month for something that doesn't happen, and when it does we have to co pay, then when it runs out we're screwed. Healthcare is the number one bankrupter in this country...over 70% of the people have health insurance when they first get sick and they still go bankrupt. Explain how this is the best please. And this has nothing to do with Obamas plan so keep it to yourself, this is about thinking we have the best healthcare and that other countries are somehow much worse then us (they aren't). Provide a source if you can.""

Need cheapest car insurance company in Alberta?

I'm 16 and I just bought a car. It's a 1998 Chevrolet tracker and I'm trying to find the cheapest insurance company. I just need liability and nothing else. Anyone have any suggestions?

Car Insurance?

Hi I have just passed my test, and was thinking about getting a car. i was wondering how much (roughly) the insurance will be, with a standard car, most probably not new, for a 17-18 year old in the UK thanks

""If im already on my parents insurance for two cars, how much more will it cost if they add a new small 03 car?""

The new car is an 03 mitsubishi lancer, the two cars i was insured on before were an elantra gt and a nissan titan (05) I wanted to know if insurance will shoot up a lot more with another car or if it will just be like another 40 or so dollars a month?""

Car insurance for a new driver aged 21?

hi, im really close to taking my driving test, and i will be 19 when i hopefully pass. but i know that i would be unable to afford car insurance just yet! however, i would be hoping to maybe get a car when i am round about 21 or 22, as i will hopefully be in a more of a position to buy and run a car! however i was wondering if you could give me a rough ESTIMATE on how much the insurance would cost! i would be looking at getting a car such as a Nissan Micra, and would more than likely get a 1.0 litre! if you could give me an ESTIMATE on how much it could cost, so i can get a general idea! i know its hard to give an exact price, but lets just say the car is all safe and has been MOT'd and is being parked in a garage! hope you can all help, oh and its for a MALE!""

My car insurance company is screwing me over?

I was just recently in a car accident. my front end recieved some harsh damage. The hood was folded towards the windshield, transmitiion was busted, the front lights were busted and the front frame was pushed back to where i could not get my front doors open. My insurance company is saying that it is a complete loss. However the garage where i took it to said that it was fixable. My car is a 2001 neon. They want to take the car and probably give me 2000 dollars for it, and they wll fix it and sell it for more. My question is should i just hand it over to my insurance company and take the 2000 dollars? or does anyone have any suggestions?""

Can I drive with my moms insurance?

Can I drive my moms car with her insurance with her in the car with me. Without being added onto her insurance policy?

Cheap Auto Insurance in Houston/Katy?

I bought a Chevrolet Avalanche 2004 a week ago. I want to know which is the cheapest full coverage insurance on the Houston/Katy area. I also would like to know where can I get the insurance just for one month.

Insurance on a range rover?

how much do you suspect insurance on a 2004 Land Rover Range Rover Range Rover would be the car is $5000 i know the lady she dais she'd sell to me I just want to make sure the insurance isn't going to be too much I'm 18 B average took driver's course and defensive driving class.......just a guess

How do insurance comparison sites work?

Sites like go compare and compare the market? I have searched for car insurance using both and get the same company coming up but offering a different price, why is this?""

Whats the cost of insurance for a 16 yr old ?

i'm 16 and i wanted to know how much would it cost for insurance ?

Who has the Cheapest libility Car Insurance in Chicago?

I want some libility Insurance under $50.dollars, not over $49dollars.""

I got a ticket for expired insurance in california....?

And i recently got car insurance so I went to court today and showed them and they said since i had no car insurance at the time of the ticket i have to pay nearly 400 dollars! so i got a 2 month extension to pay the ticket, is there anything i can do to reduce the ticket amount? or what will be the best thing to do? thanks a lot i really appreciate it!""

About how much does full coverage auto insurance cost?

I'm just curious of how much a good estimate is. If you need a vehicle, try 2000 Honda civic.""

Why does car insurance keep increasing every year?

I got USAA when I was in the military and it seems every year my car insurance rates go up by about $10. I have had the same car the whole time, no accidents and barely ever drive it. Is it normal for car insurance to keep going up like that even though me and my car are getting older?""

Free health insurance coverage in the state of California ?

My mother In- law has come to join us to live in the united states. I was wondering can she qualify for MEDICAL in the state of california. Free health insurance

Best place to buy health insurance?

Going to retire but need health insurance for family, only 55""

A quick question about car insurance?

now that I have your attention I have a serious question I need help with. Right now i'm 24, and I will be 25 in a few months. Like many young people I have been paying high car insurance rates, and have been looking forward to the quarter life insurance break. The only problem is that within the last year I've racked up 3 points on my drivers license due to an accident and a speeding ticket. Does this ruin my chances for getting a break, or will my break be less significant?""

Car insurance? Who is covered? Who is responsible?

Okay I had a question about car insurance... I am on my grandfather's car insurance plan- I live with my boyfriend. I believe I am the only one insured to drive the car....My boyfriend's mother and step-father don't have a car right now and often times ask to borrow my car- I've been letting them until it was brought to my attention that they may not be covered in that car? Does this mean I would be responsible for anything that happened? Or would they? If another car was at fault for the accident what would happen? Anyone know how this works?

Cheap car insurance for young drivers?

Ok im 20 years old ands i expect to get my full licence soon. i think a Ford KA is my best option for price when thinking about purchase price, Insurance bands, TAX bands and repair costs. The problem is all the insurance company's i have looked at will charge me around 2500. Can anyone recommend any good insurance company's for young drivers. I have tried some price comparison websites none seem to come up with anything new.""

How would limiting expenses in the health care sector assist with making health care affordable?

and increase accessibility to care, while reducing the need for insurance?""

I have a polish worker were can i find cheap car insurance for him?

I have a polish worker were can i find cheap car insurance for him?

I still haven't received my national insurance card? Does anyone know how long i'll have to wait?

i just recently applied for a NIN and couple of weeks back i received a letter with my NIN. Yesterday i got a call from a company for a interview and they've asked me to bring my card along for proof and i told them i have a written letter about my NIN but still haven't received the card. They have told me that without the card they can't offer me the job because they need to take a photocopy of it and have given me a week's time to get things sorted out :(( its been 3 weeks now does anyone know how long it takes to send the card? i'm not a uk citizen :) after 7 applications i finally got a call for interview and curse my luck :((

How much is insurance on the new Morgan?

You know the wooden car?

Term life insurance and estate planning?

Can term life insurance be used in place of long term care insurance? For instance, lets say a person is 55 yoa and in generally good health. Instead of buying long term care insurance, how about buying a term life policy for 250-300k. Should nursing home care become necessary, available funds for care costs, then upon death, survivors are reimbursed via the term life death benefit. It seems to me long term care insurance may or may not be used, and if not, the money paid for premiums is wasted . On the other hand, everyone dies, so nursing home or no nursing home, the death benefit will one day be paid. What say you?? Thanks in advance for offering your insight.""

Cheapest Car insurance ?

I'm a 16 year old guy getting license in 2 days and im staring to wonder which car insurance is the cheapest. I've been told aaa is the best, and my parents are on some aarp thing and it might be cheaper to get my own policy. SO any company names that you use would be great!""

Totaled my car and my insurance company will no cover car rental?

I have Mercury car insurance and I pay for ful coverage, I just totaled my 12 month old Camry and now my agent is telling me that I do not have access to a rental car, that the only ...show more""

Why is the Affordable Care Act proving to be so Unaffordable ..........?

Why is the Affordable Care Act proving to be so Unaffordable for almost all concerned ? The Affordable Care Act has already caused over 4 Million People to lose their Health Insurance Plans because the Plan did not meet the mandates of the accepted Affordable care Act Insurance Plans The Affordable Care Act has already caused and is continuing to cause many thousands of employees to lose their Jobs through layoffs that Businesses/Companies are making in order to reduce the number of Business/Company Employees to below 50 in order that the Business/Company is exempted from having to purchase the More Expensive Insurance Plans that are mandated by Obamacare The Affordable Care Act has already mandated that everyone be enrolled in a Health Insurance Plan with medical benefits that many people don't want and/or don't need and these additional unwanted/unneeded medical benefits have caused many Insurance Plans to raise their Premiums for these additional benefits thereby raising the cost of premiums that Most Health Insurance that Most Subscribers will have to pay more for The Bottom Line is that thousands have lost their Jobs because of the Affordable Care Act + Millions have lost their Health Insurance Plans because of the Affordable Care Act + Millions More have had their Health Insurance Premiums raised in order to pay for the unwanted & unneeded medical benefits mandated because of the Affordable Care Act so.......................Why si the Affordable Care Act proving to be anything but Affordable ?

Car Insurance?

Hi I have just passed my test, and was thinking about getting a car. i was wondering how much (roughly) the insurance will be, with a standard car, most probably not new, for a 17-18 year old in the UK thanks

How much would the treatment cost for stage 3 non-hodgkin's lymphoma if you didn't have insurance?

My friend put a friend of hers who was just diagnosed with stage 3 Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma in touch with me today, but I really don't know how to help her. She's 21, fresh out of college but unemployed, and does not have insurance. I don't know why she wasn't still on her parents' plan, or how student healthcare insurance works. She's terrified not just about the diagnosis itself but the cost. She was already financially strapped and trying to figure out how to pay for housing after college. I had Hodgkin's Lymphoma at 16-17, but my parents have insurance, and they are the ones who handled the bills. I never paid for anything myself so I really don't know about the cost involved. I saw one bill for my radiation and was literally shocked-still by the amount. It was like $1500 for each treatment I think, and I was getting them Monday-Friday then. Chemo was much more, but I never saw a bill for it so I really don't know the price. I did see a bill for one night I spent in the emergency room when I had this awful infection and a terrible fever, and without insurance that one night would have been over $7000! With insurance I think it was like $2400. All of my treatments and doctor's offices are in posh medical facilities in affluent parts of Los Angeles like Beverly Hills and Westwood / Bel Air, so perhaps that's why my medical care was so much. I honestly don't know. I wish I knew how to support or advise this girl. She's too old to attend the support group I went to, and I don't really know that much about NH-L because it's quite different than HL. I was fortunate to never have to be concerned about the finances, and I don't even know what the total amounted to since my parents won't tell me. They said, that it's not my concern. It was all medical care for me, so you'd think it would be my concern, but whatever. Will her oncologist's office help her to find financial support? How does that even work? What do they do if you can't pay? It would suck if she had to file bankruptcy this early in her life. Won't that keep her from getting a job, a loan for a house, and everything else? She went to USC. Can recent alumni be treated at their hospital for a reduced price? I was treated at UCLA, and I think at UCLA students can get medical care at a reduced cost. At my school I think we can as well. I don't know. You just show your student card. All bills are sent to your parents, so I don't know how it works. What should I tell her? She wants my help. All I really know to do is to send her the links I have on my profile. I can give her emotional support, but am clueless about financial support. What's the total cost of this going to most likely be for her?""

Does anyone know the cost of insurance for an infiniti g37 for a 18 year old boy?

Apparently, the dealer says infiniti g37 aren't technically sports cars so the insurance wouldn't be too high for my son. I'm not to sure though..can anyone clear this matter up?""

Can a 17 year old purchase health insurance?

I am seventeen years old and i no longer live with my parents(with their permission), and they do not have health insurance. I have terrible eyesight and am on my last pair of contact lenses that are not in very good shape themselves.I have a job but it would take a long time for me to save up enough money to take care of all of the costs included in getting my contacts. I need to know if i can purchase health insurance or if i am eligible for any type of coverage?""

Where can I buy cheap auto insurance or temporary auto insurance in the United States?

I know u can do it in the UK...but can't find any insurance agency in the US to do it.

Can anyone take a Life Insurance Policy on my life without me knowing it?

A while ago I heard of a story of a buisness taking life insurance policies out on their employees without their knowledge of it. So, I figure it cant be a far stretch for anyone to take out an life insurance policy on anyone if they know the relevant personal information. If they can, how can I find out what insurance company has written so I can have it DESTROYED.""

Cheapest insurance in Kansas?

Cheapest insurance in Kansas?

How much higher is the maintance cost on a BMW vs Ford/Chevy/Dodge?

i want to get a bmw as my first car, i can afford the car, insurance, taxes all that junk but what i dont no about are the service costs? compared to a regular car how much higher will they be.""

Can my dad (lives out of State) add me to his car insurance policy?

Hi. I'll be getting my first car soon and I have some questions regarding car insurance. My Dad lives out of state (I live with my mother), and I was wondering if he can add me to his insurance policy. I believe he has State Farm. I understand that it would be cheaper to go under my parent's policy than to create a new policy just for myself. My mother is unwilling to add me to her car insurance policy due to the fact that I am under 21 (insurance rates will increase). If anyone who is in the industry / has experience or knowledge about this and could shed some light, I'd appreciate it. Thanks in advanced. BTW: I'm in the US.""

I just got pulled over for not having my seat buckle on and I'm wondering how much my insurance will go up?

This is the first time I've EVER been pulled over and I've had my license for a little over a year now. I get good grades and all that stuff so my insurance is pretty low for the average person right now. I'm wondering how much my insurance will go up? SOMEONE HELP! Kinda freaking out here. :p

Can I use my parent's car insurance to buy a car?

I have been covered under my parent's car insurance since I was 19 years old and still am. I did buy auto insurance for the new car that I am picking up today from the dealership. However, that insurance does not start until 12:01 am tomorrow morning. As I am still under my parent's insurance, can I use that insurance as proof of insurance when I go to pick up the car this afternoon?""

How much home owner's insurance should I get?

How much home owner's insurance should I get?

Should i get home insurance as a home owner or a rental ?

i own a house and i rent out part of it . i pay about 925 per year. i am moving out of state should i switch to rental property rather then owner occupied insurance ? which one is better or cheaper

Umbrella insurance?

instant quotes for the stand alone umbrella insurance in california

Survey - Are you in good hands?

Survey - Are you in good hands?

Car Insurance... help?

hey.. I have zen 2004 model, i pay insurance premium of 12k at bajaj allaince I want to lower the premium, can it be done to the same policy or should i take a diff policy, at maruthi service center they told they can get me insurance at National Insurance for a premium of 5k .... does the premium amount have any effect on claims ...plz explain one more thing if i make a claim in an insurance company and the after some time if i ask for cancellation of my policy .... will they charge anything .... is it better to abandon my old policy and switch to new company or ask for formal cancellation""

Is it legal to have two different insurance companies for one car?

i am currently leaving my insurance company because they give me too much headaches (ING by the way)... i have to wait a week to offically cancel my policy (its a longg story). i found another insurance company that i would like to join right away because i told my insurance company i am putting ym car away for a few years but i just didnt want to tell them i found someone else for way cheaper and i need insurance now! but im not sure if it is possible to have comprehensive with one company and coverage with another. please let me know. Thanks!! toronto, Ontario""

Whats a cheap insurance company for a 16 year old boy?

Whats a cheap insurance company for a 16 year old boy?

Car Insurance For 17 Year Old?!?

So im doing my driving lessons but am so worried about insurance. I want to go on my dads insurance who has maximum no claims bonus. The car I will be driving is a 1.2L Vauxhall Corsa SXI (52 Plate). The cheapest quote I have had is 4000. I was just wondering if any of you guys know the cheapest insurance provider or can help me in anyway at all or tell me the best thing to do? Im willing to do a Pass Plus if that helps? Thanks.

How can I lower my car insurance?

I have a 2010 Chevy cobalt LT. I pay $420 a month for insurance! I understand I'm 21, and it's a sports car. But I've been driving for 5 years, I've never got in a crash nor gotten any tickets. Why could this be? I know lots of younger people with much more expensive cars but they don't pay nearly as much.""

Why are car insurance companies trying to make me go bankrupt?

Okay, this is extremely frustrating. I'm a 19 year old student, who works part time. I have all-state insurance full coverage, and I drive a 2001 toyota tacoma, which is paid off. And guess how much Allstate charges me every 6 months? $750!!!!!!!!!!!! That is absolutely ridiculous. These son of a bitches are totally ridiculous charging me that. I've never had a ticket, never been in an accident. And I don't care if i'm 19 that price is absolutely absurd for that car. I'm almost at the point where I just wanna go illegal and drive without insurance. I'm looking sleep every night over this I mean seriously do they think a 19 year old college student is made of money. And the funny thing is it's under my parents policy and its this much!!!""

Where can I find affordable family health insurance?

Looking to find several health company quotes.

How Can a 17 Year old Teen Afford Car Insurance?

I am a 17 year old guy working on getting my first car. I was thinking possibly a 2000 Pontiac Sunfire, or a 2006 Saturn Ion. I had looked up a few quotes from Progressive and Esurance, and noticed that the semi-annual price was VERY high, way beyond anything my family could afford. I was wondering If anyone knew of a way that I could possibly afford this. Many of the quotes totaled at $800-$1000 per six months. This is outrageously high, and that was just insurance for an adult I had quoted. Adding a teen onto the insurance would be much more expensive. If anyone has any ideas on what I can do to cheat the system per say, or just find a nice and cheap affordable, reliable insurance company I'd be extremely grateful.""

Is there a insurance company in Minnesota that covers infertility?

??

Young drivers (17-18) - What is your insurance?

Hey! Im starting driving and shocked at the cost of insurance! Can't get lower than 3000 on a 1999 1.0 Vauxhall Corsa! Must be doing something wrong. So yeah , 3 questions : 1) What is your age? 2) How much is your insurance? 3) What insurance company are you with and what car? Thanks!""

When does health insurance kick in when you start a job?

I've never had a job with insurance. I'm hoping that I finally receive my first full time job with a company (I'm a recent grad). I'm in desperate need of health insurance to take tests on my heart but it's so expensive! So if you start a job, usually how long does it take to be able to take advantage of having the health insurance?""

Car Insurance?

Hi I have just passed my test, and was thinking about getting a car. i was wondering how much (roughly) the insurance will be, with a standard car, most probably not new, for a 17-18 year old in the UK thanks

Car insurance question?

Would it be cheaper to get insurance on a Golf GTI or a older muscle caR? because there are alot of classic car insurance companies who do great deals but i don't know and as a first car by the way. i would of thought as its an older car it would be cheaper

Do motorbike insurance count towards my no claims?

i have 2 years no claims on my car insurance and am looking to geta motorbike. will my motorbike insurance go towards my no claims in total

Assurant Health Insurance?

At a previous job I had good health insurance but adding my husband was costly so we got him BCBS IL through a local insurance agent. He is not the type to go to the doctor very often so a very basic plan is what we got him. It started out only being $160 for 3 months; now today I received a letter that it will be going up to $250 for 3 months. I have changed jobs and kept my insurance for awhile through Cobra but eventually found different coverage because the Cobra was so high in cost. But of course it has went up to almost $300 a month. I have been searching online for health insurance and found Assurant and it seems like I can get good coverage at a fair price. Do you have assurant? Do you think it's good coverage? Do you have any problems with using it? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

What happens if you just don't pay your car insurance?

Where I live you get car insured and they put a sticker on the plates with expiry date a year from now. But you still only pay once a month. What happens if you simply stop paying ...show more

""Car insurance, they didn't take payment, was I insured?""

I have a classic car insurance policy with two cars on it, the policy started on one car but I later added a second. I have just taken the second car off the policy but it turns out ...show more""

Renters insurance for apartments?

When renting an apartment at a complex or apartment building, is renters insurance always mandatory?""

""Nice corsa modifications, cheaper on insurance?""

Hey guys, got myself a corsa.. Got tinted windows, alloys, irmscher body kit, tinted lights already. What other mods could I do that would be at the cheaper end of the insurance.. I don't want my insurance going up a bomb, but little to no increase mods would be great. Thanks!""

Is there ANY way to get birth control without insurance and not have to spend an arm and leg?

I'm 20 and covered by my parents' insurance-i'm a student and part-time server and do not get benefits or insurance through school. My parents however do not want to ...show more

What is a good long-term health insurance policy for international stays?

I am planning to move to Germany in spring and require acceptable, long-term and affordable coverage. What is a good company and policy for me to look in to? I've seen several offers but only one I could afford because it had a deductible of 10k$. Is there better?""

Car Insurance Calculator?

Im looking for a car insurance calculator so i can see how much this car would cost to insure should i end up getting it. Im only 17 so calling a car insurance company i would rather stay away from and idk what company my parents are even with But is there a calculator that doesnt require a ton of steps and just lets me put in what car i have and some basic questions about stuff that affects a 17 year old. Calculators i have been looking at ask for like house payments and monthly income ect and im 17. I dont have any of that. So any good and easy calculators to see if this car is too expensive to buy?

HElp With A PROJECT on CAR INSURANCE!?

ok so i have a project and all the car insurance places are closed and i can't finish it! so umm can anyone help?? this is all the information i have, i just need an estimate for a monthly payment 1996 eagle talon married couple 25 years old driver low milage on car car is paid for, goood driving history car is used for job too for dilivering pizza live in florida umm if you need any more information let me kno please helpp worth 20% of final grade in class!!!!""

Do you think i could get a used car and insurance with under $3k?

i really need a car to get around, i have full time job, n part-time student. It's getting to my nerves that whenever i need to go somewhere, i have to ask my brother or sister to take me. Yes i am a student 18 yo, i don't have much money, and my parents refuse to buy me a car, reason because my mom said insurance is too expensive, and she doesn't give a shitt about me. Do you think i could get it anywhere? i was thinking about buying the car 1st then insurance later on because i can't afford it. idk what should i do?""

""Families who live in America, how much is your health insurance per month?""

In an earlier question I mentioned that my boyfriend's parents are paying for his 24-year-old sister's health insurance after she got laid off and couldn't find another position and can't afford health care on her own, to the tune of $175 a month (and she's perfectly healthy) and was floored when someone said that was actually inexpensive. Btw, her parents insist on her having health care coverage for fear of her getting in an accident or whatever. I'm 17 and am quite obviously naive about the costs of health insurance, but I'm really curious about it, and would like to know how much it usually costs for a family to have health insurance in America. I'm in California. I don't know if it's more expensive depending on your state. If if you don't mind answering, how much do you pay per year, and how many people are in your family? Does it become more expensive as your kids get older? What kind of plan do you have? Through work or your own? Are you supportive of universal health coverage? Also: does anyone understand how Medicare / MediCal works and who decides who is covered and who isn't? Is it based on your yearly income? I'm asking because one of the reasons my boyfriend's parents want his sister to have insurance is that another family friend of ours broke her jaw in a roller blading accident when she was 26 and didn't have insurance because she was unemployed at the time, and not being able to pay the $15,000 hospital bill killed her credit score. Sorry for all the questions. I'm just really curious about all this.""

Do you have health insurance?

Do you have health insurance?

Buying used car. What do I do for insurance?

I'm buying a new car today and I was wondering if I could drive it home (~2miles) without insurance. If not, what do I do? Thanks""

Do I need an insurance license in California?

If I work for a licensed insurance agent in California by calling present clients to see if they need more or different insurance and ask questions to get a quote do I need to be licensed? The licensed agent will give all quotes.

What is the best (price and care) auto insurance for someone with a DUI?

So about 7 years ago I made a mistake and got a DUI. I realize it stays on your record for 10 years but there has to be decent full coverage insurance in San Francisco that does set me back almost $200 every month. Any suggestions?

Car insurance for a new driver?

i want to buy a small car, but im worried that the insurance will be expensive what company sell cheap insurance? how much about did you pay? i want a small car, like a 1 litre engine thank you""

How much does a root canal cost with insurance?

I do not have insurance right now. I went to the dentist's office recently and was informed that I have two wisdom teeth grown in. I have a job that offers dental insurance but I have to wait 3 more months to receive this benefit. I don't know if I should wait a few more months and pay less to get my wisdom teeth removed or if I should get it treated now and pay over $2,000 for 2 root canals and make a monthly payment of $200 for 12 months. How much would I save and pay if I were to get 2 root canals with dental insurance?""

What are a list of cars that are cheap to insure? and is a 1990 geo metro cheap to insure?

What are a list of cars that are cheap to insure? and is a 1990 geo metro cheap to insure?

Whats the auto insurance company that gives you various rates?

There was an auto insurance commercial whose gimick was that they provided you with not only their rates, but the rates of their competitors...what insurance company was that? I haven't seen that particular thing being adverstised in a few months-and I cant remember what the company was...either geico, progressive..i cant remember?!!""

Insurance doesn't pay or wanna fix my car?

a drunk guy hit my parked car and he had a suspended license and the car is under his girlfriend's name. Now the insurance says it cant do anything because its under the girlfriend's name. now i dont know what to do

Car Insurance Question?

I have bad dmv record. An accident, a failure to yield and 2 speeding tickets within the last 3 years. I totalled my car and can only affod a car I can buy cash, which I have 18,300 dollars currently. Is there a max of how much the car can be worth for liability through the insurance agencies? I am thinking of spending about 14,000 cash and just getting liability. Is this a good idea? Or should I get a cheaper car? Help is very much needed. Thank you""

How much would it cost for a 17 year old to insure a Mazda Rx 8?

Mazda RX 8 2006 1.3L i THINK its insurance group 16 but im not sure any price estimates? dont worry about telling me thats its too much money and you should get a ford ka and all that bollocks haha i simply wish to know how much it will cost when i pass my test to insure my new Mazda

Insurance against mental disorders?

Is there any insurance plan that offers income protection on becoming disabled(long-term or short term). In particular disability to work due to a mental disorder.

Car Insurance?

Hi I have just passed my test, and was thinking about getting a car. i was wondering how much (roughly) the insurance will be, with a standard car, most probably not new, for a 17-18 year old in the UK thanks

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/does-title-car-have-insurance-owners-name-peggy-barnhardt"

[nirah10]

From Anoname,

“I know. But you can’t tell me that means that you don’t feel anything about him.”

He sighed. “Rose—”

“If it was me and some bloke, you’d want to know,” she interrupted. “Besides … the universe is at stake and all that.”

He chuckled quietly. “That’s not jealousy I hear, is it?”

“Shut up and just tell me.”

“I can’t very well shut up and tell you, can I?”

“James!”

He chuckled again but it quickly faded. He was quiet while she rinsed his hair and, for a moment, she thought he wasn’t going to tell her anything.

“They were friends when they were very young,” he began quietly. “They lived near each other, played together as boys, went to school together. Their whole childhood, they were practically tied together at the hip.”

“So he’s … he’s a proper Time Lord then, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he sighed again, too deeply this time and causing himself to cough a few times. “I don’t know how he’s alive. Don’t ask me.”

“So they mean a lot to each other?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you—Well, do you … do remember the Doctor, you know, liking him?”

He scoffed. “Well, not exactly but I’m not terribly surprised that they got together. I’ll put it that way.” He shook his head. “They’re a bit … There were times when they were ready to kill each other but they’d rip the head off of anyone else who suggested it.”

He told her a little more, sometimes falling quiet for long periods of time, sometimes talking quickly as though he were excited about it. He was very vague when it came to the Master’s crimes, usually not admitting anything more than that they were terrible and that people died.

“He was so sick though,” he would always say whenever he got close to the dangerous topic. “Really, Rose. People didn’t understand that about him. He was never a bad person.”

…

It is a bit funny that while so fat James has shown nothing but dislike and anger fit the Doctor. 

But then when explaining The Master to Rose he keeps stories of his crimes vauge (like he doesn’t want to ruin The Master’s character with them)  and tries to make it very clear to Rose that The Master was not well and was not in control.  He wants Rose to know he was think and not a bad person. 

James actually tells her he wasn’t as a bad person.  "He was never a bad person.“

So he can excuse and defend the Master’s crimes away? 

But then totally hate on the Doctor?

Does he realize by defending the Master and leaving out facts and trying to make sure The Master is not painted as the bad guy he sounds just like the Doctor?

The Doctor spent years defending the Master. 

The Doctor let the Master go time and time again despite his crimes.

The Doctor’s love and attachment to the Master let him get away with crimes that the Doctor without mercy killed other enemies for. 

Does James realise by defending the Master he sounds just like the man he claims to despise?

He sounds like Doc. 

The Master was the first companion on the TARDIS and for two hundred years it was was just pretty much the twins them.  Then the next 600 years led to sometimes friends,  sometimes enemies and sometimes even weird mind games with sexual power plays and lots of flirting.  All that history would mess with anyone. But still,  James is getting a bit hypocritical by already jumping to the defense of the Master when he doesn’t even know him. 

Hypocritical to hate the Doctor but not his husband. 

Dear Anonam,

I think I have to disagree. You’re making some assumptions about why James dislikes the Doctor. James judges the Doctor for a lot of bad choices but, more than that, it’s because he knows exactly what the Doctor was thinking  when he made those choices. The Doctor can give excuses or come up with reasons for the things he did, but he did an awful lot of things quite simply because he was being selfish or cowardy, and those choices had devestating impacts on the people he was supposed to love. James knows every secret, terrible thought he’s ever had. He knows all of his faults, no matter how well hidden. Everyone is different on the inside than they are on the outside--we all have horrible little parts of ourselves that we never let out for anyone. We have throwaway thoughts that are incredibly cruel or selfish that we would never act on, but we still think them from time to time. It’s why people tend to be so hard on themselves and judge themselves so harshly--because we know exactly what’s really going on when we make decision. We know when we lie, when we cause harm, when we’re only pretending to be nice or sympathetic, and when we have alterior motives. All the things we don’t get caught for. Imagine now that someone else had that same intimate knowledge of you and you had it of them. How well do you think you would get along?

No matter what happened, James can’t help but remember his love for his friend and the guilt he felt over abandoning him when he needed help. He can forgive the Master of his crimes because he knows that he wasn’t of sound mind--that is simply something that he and the Doctor agree on. But he knows the Doctor did everything perfectly sane and often with the understanding that it was wrong or irresponsible, but he made excuses for himself and did it anyway. Furthermore, the Doctor is literally the cause of all of the guilt that James struggles with and, on top of it all, the Doctor abandoned James in another universe without a second thought for how hard that was going to be for him. Freshly “born” with no understanding of the world he was going to or even his own body, and missing all of the support and comfort that he normally has from the TARDIS. He had Rose, but even that was confusing and a bit turbulent. It was a terrible thing to do and insanely irresponsible and neglectful, but the Doctor was too busy thinking about what he was losing to think about what he was doing to James. It’s a pretty good reason to be angry.