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actualbird · 3 years ago

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Oh god!

I really love the poly headcanons they are so sweet.... (or don't but that's part of it and i think the tot boys+MC deserve all the love the world has to give).

But, liking it or not, our 4 beloved boys are kinda complicated (that's what makes them perfect). Plus I never thought about how people get in poly relationships. So i was thinking, how do you think they all get into a polyrelationship together?

(I really have no idea of how that would happen)

hi, two anons!! im glad you guys liked my nxx team polycule stuff!! i'll answer these in one go, my "headcanon" (in quotes because i think this kinda turned into a character analysis/minific of sorts HAHA) being what first anon asked, How They Get Together.

heads up, wc of this is 1.9k words long so buckle up for a bit of a read jfsjdfkjbf

because first anon, youre right!!! the boys are stupendously complicated which i love so so much but canon has also shown us clearly that each of the boys' quirks and habits and tendencies causes a lot of (mostly played for laughs) friction. the bickering, the backhanded insults, the "im the best one here" preening contests. theyre all SOOOO RIDICULOUS and it is hilarious but yep! the boys r complex!! and that means this beautiful ship, imo, has a lot of phases to get to the actual romantic relationship bit.

how they get together, in my opinion, starts because of mc.

not in the sense that she matchmakes them all, but like.

phase 1 of the nxx team polycule is this:

through being in love with her (which we all know the boys 100% are), each of the boys come to terms with their own flaws and weaknesses. it's very apparent to me in all the story thus far that these boys are flawed as hell, it's very compelling but even more compelling to me is how all of them also do intense mental gymnastics to Not Confront Those Flaws. like, marius is a dickbag always teasing and toeing the line of insincerity, vyn is a controlling mf who always tries to sway situations to his benefit, artem is so repressed to the point that he has genuine trouble with emotions, luke is a self sacrificial bastard and also a huge hypocrite about how no, actually, hes the only one that should be hiding his pain and being dishonest, no dishonesty from other people!! in the beginning of the story, all the boys have their flaws and seem to have just kinda...not addressed how those flaws are harming them and the people around them.

and then mc rolls around and they all fall in love with her. and she sees those flaws and she doesnt let them slide. she challenges the boys in her own ways to see another side of the situation, to acknowledge what theyre doing. she doesnt want to get rid of flaws, thats impossible and also not cool. she just has this beautiful hope for like, all of humanity, that goodness can prevail with the right work. so when she sees her beloved nxx boys, she believes that for them as well.

which leads to phase 2 of the nxx team polycule:

the boys, more aware of themselves, become more aware of each other.

they werent Unaware of the others of course. it's just that they didnt like...truly connect on a personal level just yet. they saw the other teammembers with their emotional armor and flaws and saw a wall that wasnt worth looking past.

but after mc makes them realize that hey, flaws arent the end of the world actually, it's alright and the person behind them may just be worth it, the boys like. end up understanding the others. A LOT OF THIS BIT IS UNINTENTIONAL, ON THEIR PARTS KJDSBFS. like they stumble into understanding each other by accident, they didnt plan it, but over the course of nxx investigations, it's inevitable that they end up seeing the depths of the others. i delve into this a little bit in my fanfic "filler eps of the lost gold" where the boys are just going thru their actions and then trip over another boy's fears or desires and through that, gain a deeper understanding mutually.

and with understanding, sometimes, comes trust.

phase 3 of the nxx team polycule goes like this:

everybody in this team, whether they like it or not, whether they know it or not, has a heart that wants to give love so desperately.

marius lives in a world full of snakes so he cant have his heart on his sleeve for his own protection. vyn wants to be seen as perfect and the heart is inherently messy so he holds it back. artem for a very very long time was focused on work and success and achievement that he neglected his heart. and luke has been giving love all his life in a sense but in a way thats hidden.

all these tendencies that are brought upon their life circumstances results in this: they want to love honestly but they havent been able to do this

until mc. and all of them want to push back whatever fears or patterns their life has instilled in them because they see her and see somebody so unwaveringly good that all their hearts begin giving love to her to make her happy and to make themselves happy as well.

but heres the thing. the boys dont just see mc. by this point, they have connected and understood and come to trust each other as well, and the consequence of that is that They Can See Each Other Now Too, Truly.

and heres the thing. all of the boys are unwaveringly good as well.

one by one, each of the boys realize that what they feel for the other boys in the team starts to...change. yeah theyre all friends, they pick on each other a lot of the time, but the bedrock of the relationship is solid and strong now. but when marius is with luke, marius sees a light inside of luke so bright that he seems unaware that he gives off. when artem is with vyn, artem sees a goodness inside of vyn that hesitates to make itself obvious and known because vyn is scared of getting hurt thanks to it. all of them see the other and their goodness and, unbidden, their hearts want to give love to each other as well.

and because theyre all a bit stupid in their own way theyre like, huh, weird! wonder why this feeling is so familiar! and yet i cant seem to name it...and then they all independently compare these feeling with the feelings they have for mc, a feeling they do know the name of, and theyre like.

WAIT.

THESE FEELINGS ARE...VERY BASICALLY EXACTLY WHAT I FEEL FOR MC.

which only means one thing: theyve fallen in love with everybody else

marius: //goes to his studio to Think and sees that a bunch of his recent art actually had little crumbs of these feelings already, etched into the brushstrokes and scenes. has an emotional crisis about it

vyn: //records a 1 hour long entry in his audio diary to examine and gain control of his feelings but by the end of the hour all he knows is that he wants to hold these people and be held by them

artem: //quite literally just bluescreens, artem.exe has stopped working, sits at his study and slowly, slowly, thunks his head down onto his desk, valiantly trying to ignore the fast pulse of his heart

luke: //manically vents about it to peanut who, by virtue of being a bird, doesnt get it. just keeps talking at peanut to get a grasp of it all and then lies down on the floor, overwhelmed

mc, sitting in her apartment watching some netflix: ...why do i inexplicably feel as if something very, very important has just happened?

phase 4 of the nxx team polycule is basically:

pining: extreme difficulty level

because pining is already hard when ur pining for one person. what more for an additional 3 more people. and those additional 3 more people are pining back.

and all these boys are SOOOO OBVIOUS with their romantic feelings, in their own special way. the way they show their affection to mc starts to bleed into their interactions with the others and everybody can CLEARLY SEE WHAT IS GOING ON, LOL, but also all the boys are too chickenshit to confront it, because if they confront it, what will even happen??? being in love with each other, all of them, thats going to be such a complicated fucking relationship, holy shit. it's 2030, yeah, being a polyamorous group relationship isnt completely unheard of, but sue them, theyre scared.

but mc (who i forgot to mention already knows of the boys' romantic feelings for her, shes just hasnt made a move yet on any of them because SHES IN LOVE WITH ALL OF THEM AS WELL and shes been trying to figure out how the hell to make that work, she cant bear to choose just one of them, she'd be heartbroken over leaving the rest of them behind) sees that the nxx investigation team is now all pining for each other FULLY and she kinda wants to laugh when she realizes whats going on because like, what are the chances? that this would happen? that they all found each other and their feelings fell into just the right place for nobody to be left behind?

theyre all scared, she can tell. and she is as well, she wont lie.

but shes always had a belief that goodness can prevail with the right work.

and love is one of the greatest goods out there.

phase 5 of the nxx team polycule:

It's Time For Communication, Baby!!!!!

the exact scenes of how this happens is a bit vague to me. it could go two ways: mc going to each of the boys independently to talk about feelings, hers about everybodys and his about everybodys as well. OR they have a fucking meeting about it all together and artem literally schedules it in his google calendar, or something.

either way, they like, actually talk about this. starts casual, maybe over a chill date, maybe over dinner at a nice restaurant, maybe over a walk in the park as the sun is starting to set. but where ever it happens, the end result is the same: a heart is laid out bare and it is taken in gentle, grateful hands.

marius: OKAY, NOW THAT THE FEELINGS ARE OUT OF THE WAY, CAN I PLEASE KISS ONE OR ALL OF YOU, PLEASE, IVE BEEN WANTING TO KISS U GUYS FOR FOREVER

vyn, laughing fondly: has anybody ever told you patience is a virtue? we quite literally just talked it all out.

marius: //needy whining noises

artem, embarrassed: ive...never kissed anybody before

luke, embarrassed but trying to play it Cool: ....same here

mc: kissing is great, you two will love it!

marius: awesome, awesome, so is ANYBODY going to give me a go ahead or WHAT????

phase 6 of the nxx team polycule:

i dont want to say it's happily ever after, once they all get together. thats not really realistic.

they all have their quirks and tendencies and habits. and those will inevitable clash against each other. theyll have their arguments, theyll get upset, theyll sulk and be angry, sometimes. but also...

theyll see each other smile and feel like their love shining so brightly. theyll reach out for another's hand and be held in such a way that makes them think that their heart is in a safe place. theyll love each other and theyll put in the work to continue loving each other. because goodness will prevail.

and they all see each other as the most good people in the world.

so whatever happens, theyll get through it together.

#tears of themis #vyn richter #marius von hagen #tears of themis rosa #artem wing

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serowotonin · 4 years ago

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LiPS𝐓1CK St4𝐈NS ! (💋)

❝ having lipstick and giving him a kiss and he doesn't realize he has it on his face until his teammates are all like 0-0 ❞ — @/luna-in-luv

++ fem!reader x oikawa, kuroo

| wc. 1.3k

| note. djslsdf it took so long to edit this post T-T,,,,, when ur indecisive af and can’t decide on a post format :D anyways just wanna say reblogs are greatly appreciated and i hope u guys like this<3

( ➷ ); ― OiK4WA

another day of school, another day of.. well, another day of boredom

you had to admit though, school had become a lot more fun since you and oikawa got together;)

altho you were in different classes, you’d still pass each other in hallways and see each other during breaks

and ofc every interaction, no matter how small, definitely made your day brighter

the smaller interactions consisted mainly of random head pats as he walks pass by, or a smirk and a wink whenever you two make eye contact

when there weren’t as many people around,,, maybe a hug or a kiss if either of you felt like it

and very rarely..

a makeout session in an empty classroom or staircase

its rare but it does happen

and it was happening… right now

school ended about half an hour ago and everyone either left or went to do their club activities

which was what oikawa should probably be doing too,, but today he just “felt like going in a little later”

and so there you two were, in the dark corner of an abandoned classroom grasping at the other as if you haven’t seen them in years

idk how to describe a steamy makeout sesh okkk

anyways,, after about 6 ignored calls from iwaizumi tho.. you two figured it was probably time for him to go to practice

you two straightened yourselves out; cleared the ruffles from your uniforms, tidied your hair, etc.

oikawa texted iwa that he was on his way while you touched up your makeup

“you gonna walk me to practice?”

“of course,” you smiled. “altho i have my own club activities today too so i can’t stay and watch :( ”

“dont worry babe,,, just walking me there is enough” he replied with a grin

then he slung an arm over your shoulder and the two of you walked out of the classroom as if nothing happened

as you neared the entrance of the gym, you slowed to a stop and tugged at oikawa’s shirt

he turned and you leaned to give him a kiss on the cheek

“good luck with practice” you said before giving him a small wave and walking off

did you see the dark mark your lipstick left on his cheek?

yes.

were you going to say anything about it?

well,,,, you already turned to walk away and oikawa was already entering the gym

so no.

anyways,, as oikawa entered the gym, the first thing he saw was his beloved iwa-chan

looking not very happy

oikawa waved sheepishly as he turned his head to the side to look at where everyone else was

this for some reason made iwaizumi look even more not happy

makki and mattsun then walked over and snickered upon seeing oikawa

“ah was y/n here? why didn’t you invite her to watch hmm?~” makki teased

“she’s got club activities too you know..”

smh

they probably realize oikawa doesnt know bout the kiss mark

the three of them were just staring at oikawa like (￢_￢;)

and oikawa's just standing there like (◕‿◕)?

“can we go practice now..?”

iwa: (￣︿￣) “wipe that stupid mark off your cheek”

huh? mark? he was pretty sure he wiped off any evidence from ahem what was happening earlier…

at this point some of the younger members started staring at them

and oikawa spotted them out of the corner of his eye and could practically feel the awkwardness in their gazes

he put a hand on the cheek everyone was staring at and removed it to see the same color that painted your lips

oh...

a slow smile spread on his lips at the realization of what you did

he laughed to himself

‘she’s gonna be the death of me..’

and with that he wiped off the remnants of your lipstick and hurried over to start practice

later tho, he asks you to kiss him again wearing that lipstick

and you do

and he snaps a selfie,,, which is now his phone wallpaper ;3

( ❣︎ ); ― KUR0O

today, you’re boyfriend, the one and only Kuroo Tetsurou, had a volleyball match

and ofc being the amazing, supportive gf you were, you were present in the stands, cheering him on

you didn’t get to meet or even talk to him before the match started, save for a few quick texts

so when he came on to the court for warm up and spotted you in the crowd,,,

he gave a cheeky wink and wave

you could practically feel the confidence roll off him in waves but you knew, deep down, he was the tiniest bit nervous too

afterall, the opponents weren’t a weak team by any standard

they were strong and known for their relentless attacks

which were put to display almost immediately after the game started

nekoma held on though, and managed to put in a few attacks of their own to level the game

you could see the hard work behind each of the members’ skills, having witnessed a lot of it yourself

it was most clear in kuroo tho

and as he jumped to block another spike, you were on the edge of your seat

the boys just needed one more point… which came when kuroo shut down the last spike

you and the rest of the people in the stands around you erupted into cheers

and as they were leaving the court, you ran to steal kuroo away for a more personal cheer

the two of you walked the halls of the stadium talking abt the game

you were gushing about this block and that and he was smiling at your gushing cuz damn was his y/n cute

N E WAYSSS,,, he received a text from kenma saying that they were all waiting for him at the bus

“i should go.. don’t wanna keep them waiting long”

“yeah.. you should”

before he could move tho, you tiptoed and placed a big fat kiss on his cheek

you swear you saw a blush on those cheeks as you backed down

he grinned and gave you a kiss of his own on your forehead before saying bye and running off

as he did, you realized you forgot to mention the lip-shaped mark on his cheek

oops… its too late now ┐(︶▽︶)┌

anyway,, kuroo arrives all smiles to where the team are waiting

and make no mistake they all CLEARLY see evidence of ur “little” kiss from back there

they just kinda,,,, don’t say anything at first?

kenma rolled his eyes and went back to doing whatever on his phone

yaku glared at it out of spite or some similar emotion

the others just choose to ignore mainly cuz they assume kuroo already knows and chose to keep it there

to them its just kuroo being a cheesy mf who was rubbing the non-single life in their faces or smth

ofc he has no idea tho

which just makes it all the more better when lev says

“y/n has nice lipstick”

and kuroo’s just like wtf ?? whatcha goin on bout my gf’s lipstick hUH

and he says that.. or something similar at least

and lev just points to his cheek like

“duhh i can see it right there”

he grabs his phone, opens the front facing camera, and is met with the outline of your lips on his cheek

and thats when he obviously started blushing

but then he just kind of smirked once he realized you knew about the mark

when yaku sees the smirk he went “OMFG JUST WIPE IT OFF ALREADY !! WE GET IT !! YOU ARENT SINGLE YOU GET KISSES STFU”

not like that but practically exactly what he was trying to say anyway

tbh kuroo’s a little reluctant to rub it off cuz idk,, he likes it ??

but he does anyway cuz they were still in public and there were teachers who were gonna come soon and all the other reasons

once hes comfortably seated in the bus tho, with a clean cheek, he sends u several texts

‘ saw that gift you left on my cheek… ’

‘ wouldn’t mind if u gave me more tmr afterschool ;) ’

| taglist. @lilikags @luna-in-luv ... send an ask if u wanna be added !!~

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iwaisa · 4 years ago

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class 1-a boys kissing their crush for a tiktok

pairings: midoriya, bakugou, and kaminari x gender neutral reader

warnings: mild swearing, a lil suggestive, tooth-rotting fluff

a/n: this wasn’t a request, but it just happened to pop into my head and i got really excited :D

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

► now shuffling...

babie 🥺

i think that he would have tiktok, but would never post

he just likes watching them

especially clips of All Might

one day he’s scrolling through tiktok and he comes across a video of two people sitting in a car

there's text at the top saying “hanging with my best friend!”

he watches as they laugh and playfully push each other

honestly he starts to smile from just watching them be happy

and then one person leans in

and grabs the other person’s face

and kisses them

he’s like 😄 what

so it's normal for people in the States to kiss their best friends ??/?//?

but at the same time he doesn’t stop thinking about it

and he doesn’t stop thinking about you

and what you might do if you were in that persons’ position

you two were pretty good friends, and you always were hanging with his friends

it didn’t take long for you to catch feelings for the green-haired boy

fast forward to that weekend and he still hasn’t stopped thinking about that video

and he decides he’s been pining over you long enough

he’s in the common room at the dorms and he calls you to meet him down there

he’s setting up his phone as he sees you walk into the room

he tells you he wants to do a tiktok with you

you’re like okay 😃

so the song starts and he tells you to dance

so you two are just dancing like dorks

and then right before the song picks up

you know the part i’m talking about

he turns towards you and places his hands on your cheeks softly

and he starts to lean in

and you’re just frozen in place

he accidentally bumps foreheads and noses with you but it's okay! you two end up sharing a really sweet and slow kiss

after the video ends you just stand there like 🧍

and he’s like 🧍‍♂️

and then he apologizes asking if he invaded your personal space while flailing his arms around

i mean you just kissed me but go off

he’s muttering quietly about something along the lines of “i should’ve prepared for what would’ve happened if you didn’t like it”

you put your hands on his shoulders and say that you liked it and that you liked him

he’s never been more red in his whole life

so then he calms down and sucks it up and asks you to be his s/o

after you say yes, he just about passes out

he leans down to give you a kiss again, this time being a little longer than the previous one

your video went viral due to the fact that it was ‘the perfect awkward first kiss’

he thinks it’s bullshit

one because he doesn’t get why they had to do it on camera

and two because he’s positive you’ve already seen the trend (hypothetically speaking: IF he wants to do this with you. hypothetically though.)

three because he has no idea how to kiss someone and he's a little jealous 🥺🥺🥺

what’s the point in surprising you if you already know the trend right?

hypothetically 😳

the bakusquad is hanging out in the common room talking about the test you guys had today

mina switched the topic when she started squealing

“look at this cute video!”

she shows them a video of two people dancing in the rain

the guys are like uhhhhh aight

bakugou is complaining that they would just get a cold so it’s stupid

but then the one person leans over and kisses the other

and they’re like OHHHHHHH

that person’s got game

n e ways

bakugou pretends not to be interested because he’s tsundere like that ☺️☺️☺️

he yells at them to stop watching those stupid videos

yeah, bakugou. those stupid videos you would kill to recreate

but one day he’s laying in bed past 8 pm because he can't sleep

and he decides to download tiktok

he stays up until 10 pm for the first time !1!11!!

he keeps watching those videos and imagining him and you in those positions

fast forward the next day and he’s talking to kirishima and mina

and they see that he has tiktok on his phone

they start bullying him to the point where he blurts out that he ‘just wanted to make a stupid f*cking kissing video with you’

they’re stunned

but not that stunned because they literally see him checking you out all the damn time

he has no self control

so they hatch a plan to get bakugou to make a tiktok

and they finally decide to do it in his dorm room since you two will be studying there later

so you show up in his dorm and he’s so stiff

like iida stiff

you think its weird as hell but you don’t question it

you sit at his desk and he sits on the floor at his table

you two start working on homework occasionally asking each other questions

then suddenly he puts his phone on the desk next to you with tiktok open

“oh! do you wanna film a tiktok? wait,,,, you have tiktok??”

he just nods his head, tells you to stay right there and presses the button

he kinda stands behind your chair like 🧍‍♂️

and you’re nodding along to the song smiling

and you see him slap his face and he stomps up to you

he turns you around in the chair and kisses you aggressively

emphasis on the aggressively

because your head and teeth hurt

also did he just bite your lip??

so the tiktok ends and he pulls away

“kacchan, do you liiiike me?” you tease

“HELL NO DUMBASS”

“ouch. well i liked that. and i like you.”

…

…..

“..fine. i like you too dumbass.”

both of you are just blushing idiots

his video went viral but at what cost

the people in the comments were clowning him for being so aggressive 🤡

this dude is such a mf tease

you two will shamelessly flirt in class

aizawa has most definitely gotten pissed way too many times to count

but it's too fun to stop

he 100000% has tiktok and makes prank videos with sero

he has a video that has millions of views because it was a compilation of bakugou getting angry at them for pranking him

one of the videos you were in because you watched as sero made a tape trap on the doorway

bakugou chased mina right into the trap and the video turns to you doubling over laughing

denki watches that video everyday just to see you laughing 😪😌

but there is an issue

denki thinks you don’t like him because you two are such good friends and he’s sure you only see him that way

and you think he’s only messing with you and isn’t serious about all of the flirtatious things he says to you

when you aren’t together both of you are definitely really sad about it

but the bakusquad knows

oh they knowwwwwwwww

it’s painful to watch both of you get so flustered because of each other but not do ANYTHING about it

it pisses bakugou off to no end

“WHY DON’T YOU JUST MAKE ONE OF THOSE SHITTY TIKTOKS THEN DUNCE FACE”

“...bakubro you have tiktok?”

no, but kirishima does. and he definitely showed bakugou, mina, and sero a video from the trend. the only person who hasn’t seen this trend is denki (surprisingly because he’s usually so on top of all the newest trends)

it was a video of two people sparring with each other

at first he’s like “how do they go from this to kissing each other?”

then he sees the one person speed towards the other and literally sweeps them off their feet before planting a big ol kiss on the other person’s lips

oh. so that’s how.

after that denki does his research

and he plans out exactly where and when he wants it to happen

and he decides he’ll do it at a little park

when he asks you to go to the park you think it's kinda sus since no one else is going

but you just ignore it because you think he doesn’t like you like that. right?

WRONG.

he is THIS CLOSE to shitting his pants. no doubt.

you two arrive and he runs to the seesaw

you go on the other side and you two start bouncing up and down

then you move on to the slide

you’re standing on the platform and you watch as he sets his phone up on a bench

you’re like????

is he gonna prank ME??

he’s too scared to prank you in fear of you not liking him 🥺

he runs back over to you and tells you to come down the slide and that he’ll catch you

so you come down the slide and he stops you right at the end

you two stare at each other for a second

but then this mf chickens out

he covers his face with his hand and backs away quickly

so you move on to the monkey bars

he runs to set the camera up (again)

you’re just chillin on the monkey bars swinging your legs and he goes up to you and stops your legs from swinging

“catch me denki!”

he yelps as you let go of the bars but he does catch you

and now your legs are wrapped around his waist

you put your arms around his neck and smile down at him

and then he leans up to capture your lips

you’re so stunned that you don't even realize until a few seconds later until you kiss back

you tug on his hair and this man literally pulls away and moans

he also accidentally shocks your thighs with his fingers

you pull away and you’re like?? denki?? did u?? just? moan?????

he’s already embarrassed from the fact that he finally kissed you that he doesn’t need to be embarrassed from THAT too

the tiktok ended a while ago but you two just stare at each other

you finally clear up that you do in fact like him back

then he asks you to be his s/o

when you say yes he spins you around

his video went viral purely for the fact that everyone clearly saw him moan LMAOOO

#mha #bnha x reader #bnha #anime #denki kaminari #katsuki bakugou #izuku midoriya #kaminari x reader #bakugou x reader #midoriya x reader

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4dtk · 4 years ago

Text

stuck with you

pairing: enemy!journalist!haechan x journalist!reader

genre: angst, fluff, humour, enemies to lovers (hope i did the trope justice tbh TT)

warnings: cursing, f words lmao, i mention stranger things a lot in this??? mainly bc i just finished watching it w a friend. i also only use ‘haechan’ when narrating the story so i don’t get confused! the timeline for this is Very Weird as well bc like i didn’t consider how long a pandemic would last…… so Uhm. pls just excuse the weird ass time sequence. also referenced yangyang’s bastard child behaviour from dream plan where he packs his things messily and kun had to mf intervene and yangyang had the audacity to go like “see, this is how u get ppl to pack for you, now i don’t have to do anything” 💀

word count: 8k (a headache to proofread...)

A/N: first time trying an e2l trope and im not sure if it was done ok??? i didn't want it to feel too rushed so i tried to spread out the days as much as i could!! i also included small snippets of their life w the other so it won’t seem like the fic is just focusing on the e2l concept! was inspired tons by the lyrics of stuck with u by ariana grande and jb, so that song is definitely something you can listen to if you read this! hope you enjoy ^^

[day 1]

"you're insufferable," you groan, reluctantly handing over the remote control for the hotel's television after some unsuccessful scrolling.

hotels never exactly had much range anyway.

you were very much already dreading the time ahead with the male, sadly having been stuck in quarantine not even half a day with haechan.

offering to go to a neighbouring country to report on the rising covid-19 situation, you didn't expect your rival to tag along, no doubt seeking to craft up a better story than you would.

and so, you were now nudging the remote control into his waiting palm with a roll of your eyes. you hoped it emphasised your annoyance with him even a little, standing up to prepare a cup of tea before bed.

"are you going to keep watching television while i sleep?" you ask a genuine question, peeking at him through the mirror of the vanity that sat outside the bathroom.

he just shrugs with a tired sigh, turning his attention back to the cartoon playing in front of him.

"okay, well, keep to your side of the bed and i'll stay in mine. we need to be social distancing, anyway."

there's a hint of "okay, loser" mumbled under his breath, but you pay it no thought as you finish your tea and brush your teeth before you skillfully set up a fortress made out of pillows.

"ow! what the hell?"

"your leg was in the way, jeez! move it, and i'll stop annoying you," you said, putting up the last of your requested pillows beside where haechan currently sat.

taking one last glance at haechan, you wondered when the lockdown in your country would last before they start letting people fly in. for now, you were trapped with the nightmare himself in a sad hotel room, with only a bed to share.

"goodnight," he tells you, but the sardonic way he says it irks you to the point where you settle for silence instead. the only thing that drones on are the voices of the cartoon, soon fading as you feel into a dreamless sleep.

[day 4]

"this virus thing is probably driving me insane by day, and you, lee haechan, are adding on to it!"

"no headlines, no idea what style to write in, minimal pictures-" the doorbell to the hotel room interrupts your current rant, prompting you to storm off to answer the call with an annoyed look.

"what now?" taken aback by your quick response, the housekeeping girl retracts with downturned eyebrows and a voice hesitant to speak. your roommate comes to the rescue almost immediately when he's heard the commotion.

you watch as he sends her a smile and a wink, deflating when he's let her in to clean up the room. you're not sure why you can't keep your eyes off the both of them as they converse, blaming it mostly on your hatred for the male.

with the last of her duties fulfilled, you offer to help her with the cleaning supplies as an apology, but she cuts you off almost immediately. there's a linger in her step, however, as she walks the short hallway to the door, evident in wanting haechan to send her off as he received her.

turning back to call him, he holds up a hand as he types down his opening lines to an article, prompting you to shoot the housekeeper girl another apologetic look.

"sorry again," you mumble, letting out a sigh at how this was all playing out. day four and you were already making enemies with the hotel crew.

"maybe day forty-one is where i fall in love with lee haechan," you scoffed, perhaps listing down all the unfortunate things that could happen while you were in quarantine.

one of them was catching feelings for your rival.

rolling your eyes, you settled on the bed to catch a few Zs as he continued to work on his article, though you weren't exactly sure about the weight your words held.

[day 9]

"haechan, what is this?" you ask with an eyebrow raised, his dirty boxers barely hanging off your finger.

haechan only groans at that, knowing you were relentless in the laundry. even in a pandemic, he was sure you'd prioritise your clothes first.

"jesus! don't go picking up my underwear just like that!" he snatches it from you, folding it neatly and placing it next to where his luggage sat. unfortunately, yours was right beside his.

"you think just because you're doing the laundry you're able to look through a man's prized possessions-!"

your jaw drops, "it was near the sink, haechan! i don't want to look at the checkered pattern on your boxers when i brush my teeth. i don't want it near my face either."

haechan groans yet again, running a hand through his hair in frustration before turning back to the computer, a blank document opened up in front of him.

despite gathering findings, interviewing healthcare workers and serving the public alongside frontline staff, he had deleted every attempt at writing.

there's a rumble from the bathroom, perhaps from your upset stomach or the choked pipe, but sometimes they sounded too similar he couldn't tell it apart. haechan stifles a laugh when there's a "fuck!" echoing behind the door, though unsure if he should help you or not.

when haechan hears another crash, he comes running without hesitation with a face morphed into furrowed eyebrows and a tilt of the head.

"don't just stand there, you moron!"

haechan snaps out of his daze to assist you off the floor, swiftly helping you even more off the floor as he carries you to the bed with a stiff one arm. you notice his other hand hanging awkwardly, probably not knowing what to do with it before you feel the soft sheets under your butt.

he gets to work within a minute, fishing for an ointment and some bandages his mother forced him to bring. he remembers it as he always has: a caring mother looking out for her son, maybe a little too much sometimes.

haechan is thankful for his mother, now, for the stray bandages laying around in his pouch.

you watch in silence as he cleans the cut with alcohol, wincing when his hand hadn't even touched your skin.

"my hand isn't even on your skin yet! jeez, calm down."

you shake your head, holding onto his bicep to halt his arm, "just use water, please."

exhaling in exasperation, you wonder if you've pissed him off tenfold when he leaves for the bathroom with a side-eyed glance, though not hostile.

"problematic," haechan whispers, dabbing a wet cloth over the wound carefully before applying the ointment and securing the bandages.

"your words contradict your actions so much, haechan. i never know what you're thinking." sighing, you pull your leg away from his hold after he's done with the bandages, making your way to the bathroom and leaving him in his thoughts.

"why do you want to know?"

haechan gets silence; the lock of the bathroom audibly turns to signal another wall put up between the two of you. with another frustrated groan, the boy plops down on the chair to work on his article with the right words forming in his mind.

even if he was the one who asked, he wasn't sure if he was ready to tell you.

[day 13]

"stranger things is freaking me the fuck out, man!" haechan whispered, ignoring your pleads and groans to continue writing.

"haechan! give me the damn laptop! i don't even know why you brought an HDMI cable when it doesn't work with the television system here!"

"well, we got one that matches it, didn't we?" he said, eyes peeled to the screen that showed the young boy, will, in the upside-down.

"you mean you did!" you shoved him, ready to disconnect the devices before haechan held you back, clearly entranced by the next sequence of eleven being able to see will in a pool of salt.

"ugh, god, i don't even know why people watch the show!" you spill with sourness, knowing the show was praised for its excellent acting and writing.

haechan raises an eyebrow, turning to you with a strangely slow speed.

"stranger things have received multiple awards, and you didn't give any other reason. are you scared?"

when you struggle to find words, haechan laughs at his revelation, hiding his pearly whites behind his hand as he continues to make fun of you.

"yeah yeah, i'm scared! so what?"

"'oh haechan! oh no~ i'm terrified, would you care to provide some comfort?' jeez, don't worry, man, i'll protect you." there's a cheeky glimmer in his eyes and a cocky smirk on his face which you very much want to wipe off with the disinfectant in the toilet.

"it's not all that bad, c'mon! give it a-" turning back to the tv, the sudden attack of the demogorgon lashing out at the camera has the male screaming, hiding behind your body in fear.

"you were saying, mr superman?" you deadpan, unlatching his arms around your waist as you sink deeper into the sheets with your phone in hand.

[day 17]

haechan thrashes in his sleep, almost knocking the wine glass you had in your hands when he crosses over the pillow barrier you made.

"what in the hell-" you winced, keeping an eye on the male should he have any more outbursts that would ruin both wine night and the stuff you were working on for the article.

with tipsy hands, your keyboard keys unconsciously write out a letter of disdain and confusion regarding haechan, the boy sleeping next to you with a cute drooling face and curly hair.

with beautiful tan skin like that, you wondered why he didn't model instead. with a voice as impressive as his, you wondered why he didn't sign a contract. with natural hosting capabilities, you wondered why didn't fucking get the place of a talk show host.

because man, he can get pretty bothersome sometimes.

[day 20]

the next few days pass by with a breeze.

despite not knowing how the current pandemic will turn out, you find haechan more bearable, his habits being dumped in the past with a wave of a hand.

petty arguments occur, of course, until one of you brushes off the matter like nothing.

today was one of the days you won't back down.

there's worry evident on your face, eyes scanning through every last document on the stupid laptop. fingers travel fast over the keyboard as the realisation slowly dawns on you.

with slumped shoulders, you take a deep breath before turning to the male.

"what do you mean you accidentally deleted my article? i know we're sharing the damn laptop, but we established that you stay on your files and i stay on mine."

the other waved his hand, "i did not touch any of your files, (y/n), i'm not sure what happened."

"how could you not know? what the hell? i had good content on it, but now i have to spend more hours reorganising the news and interview answers and everything else in my notes. thanks, lee haechan."

"maybe if you weren't so caught up in me trying to sabotage your place in the publication team, then you would've believed me." he shrugged, taking a seat on the one bed like nothing.

you scoffed, arms crossing across your body. "funny how you mention sabotage because a villain never reveals their motive. that's why you came with me, didn't you?"

haechan stuck his tongue out to the side of his mouth, eyes blinking and rolling like an 8-ball that it sickened you to the core.

"villain? i'm the villain?"

"was i not clear?" you hiss, stepping closer to the male.

"no, make it more precise, please. i wanna hear it word for word. spit it out, coward."

with every word, you plunged your finger into his chest, looking deep into his eyes. "you're set out to take my place for department editor, where you know i'm best at."

"and that department would be...?" he crossed his arms, looking down at you with scorn you wished you could slap off his face.

"the..." you gulp with his face all up in yours, eyes boring as he awaits your answer, no doubt losing confidence at your realisation.

"the world depart...ment? you love to travel, right?" you trail off, biting your lip in anxiety when you remember how he was on the plane. you don't exactly remember whether he was more excited or scared.

"wrong! try again."

"politics?" you propose.

haechan's face contorts into disbelief, with his mouth twisted with perplex and eyebrows furrowed. "me? politics?"

your mouth runs dry at the roadblock you've faced, and as that annoying, stupid smirk grows, your hatred for him increases by the charts.

"naming departments i'd rather die than join, running your mouth, accusing me of deleting your files..." haechan shakes his head dramatically, rolling his eyes and letting out a fat sigh.

"you think i wanna be stuck here with your infuriating ass? god, you're so entitled, aren't you? aren't you?!"

"talking like you own the place, talking like you're the only one in this world, talking like- mhfh-"

within three angry steps, you were across the room.

within three booming steps, your hands were on his face.

within three significant steps, you were kissing lee haechan.

"you never learn to shu..." with horror, you're brought back from the trance with widened eyes.

"oh, god, sorry. what. what the hell. what the fuck?" you whisper, pushing the boy away with both hands in a panic, trying to highlight your scorn for him by wiping your lips on your sleeve.

had you liked it?

the other scurried to the balcony in a frenzy while you collected yourself in the bathroom, although no amount of water could calm your nerves.

with shaky words in bed, you both agreed to never talk about it again.

[day 25]

"hey, i can see your damn annotations on my article, (y/n). will you stop it?" haechan whines, making you second guess if he was joking or not.

for the nth time that day, you roll your eyes and proceed to sip from your cup of gin tonic that haechan desperately wanted you to try. it was... a refreshing taste, but hell, you wouldn't drink this even if it was the last beverage on earth.

"i'm just giving my feedback, be thankful i didn't bring up that stupid kiss five days ago. bleugh."

haechan falls quiet at that, fingers lingering over the keyboard as he typed out some note with the speed of a sloth's.

"hey, call me donghyuck. that's my actual name," he mumbles, glancing at you through his bangs while he awaits your reply.

"donghyuck? is haechan an alias?"

the boy shrugs, "i don't know, maybe. my friends gave it to me when i was younger, and i just stuck with it."

"full sun? your friend gave it to you, sure." you grin with a gesture of your hand, almost spilling the gin in the clear glass before breaking into small laughter with the other.

[day 28]

"hey! hey, what the hell?" you whisper, feeling the boy huddle up to you in lightning speed.

"what is wrong with you?" you whisper-shout, nudging him off your body as his phone screen remains as the only thing illuminating his face.

"sorry, i- i was watching stranger things while i was shitting and after i cleaned up... i heard something and bolted out of there."

"so now you're butt naked? hyuck, ew!" you groan, thankful for the sheets that were covering your body and his junk. his reluctance to get off you didn't seem to bother you as much as earlier, but you still wished he wasn't literally naked against you.

"go put on your underwear, you big baby. i'll be here when you come out. no demogorgon is going to come out, for real."

"no no, i was watching season two and it was that big shadow thingy that freaked me out. can't you feel this poor boy shivering?" haechan sighed, eyes never leaving the corridor that led to the bathroom.

"i can, and i also can feel your dick. please get dressed, or you're sleeping on the floor," you mumble, pulling the sheets to cover your freezing body.

[day 31]

your face hits something soft, cuddling into it even further because of its warmth before you realise there was only one other thing that would be warm in the room.

haechan.

your breath shakes, and your eyes widen as you pull yourself away from his embrace. your subtle movement leaves him thrashing around, though, and his arms tighten around your figure slowly and endearingly.

gulping, you will your hands to stay in their place, opting to freeze to death although there are hints of heat crawling onto your face.

when you wake up, you find that his hand's in yours and maybe you were searching for one wrong thing. an anomaly, an exception. it fit in yours perfectly, however, his tanned skin glowing lightly under the rays of sun filtering through the curtains.

you hoped he didn't realise the small shift of your fingers as they enclosed around his hand.

[day 32]

"what are you doing out here?" haechan asked quietly, peeking around the sliding door before joining you on the chilly balcony. it wasn't much, but it was still different and refreshing from the old, stagnant aircon air that was blowing in the hotel room.

"can't sleep," you whisper. you had your arms around your figure cautiously, as if it could protect you from all the bad, evil and terror in the world. at this point, you weren't sure what was it that you were feeling, but it sure didn't involve entertaining haechan's teasing.

luckily, he bit his tongue from making the usual snarky remarks.

"it's two in the morning, what's up?"

you shake your head in reply, watching the empty streets as the last light in the apartment across you switches off. sure, at two in the morning, pavements were dusty clean, and the birds were sleeping, but there would always be younger boys smoking along the road, or a drunken group of friends laughing about a past memory.

now that the pandemic forced everyone into their homes, everything was pretty much dead. there wasn't that excitement you felt when you saw a late-night kiss shared between two lovers or the snug hug of a child to his father who was working overtime that day.

"nothing's up, hyuck, it's fine. you can get back to sleep if you want."

maybe today you two were the one causing the ruckus this time, though. haechan may have let his words slipped, and at that moment, you knew you regretted that bloom in your chest when his lips met yours.

"you're so hard to read, (y/n). i want you to be able to trust me, tell me what's going on."

"why do you wanna know anyway? so you can expose me of my bad habits and weak points?" you whisper, eyes trained on the flickering lamppost a few yards away.

"there you go again! again with the sabotage?" haechan scoffed, exiting the small space and stepping back into the room of mixed emotions.

"is this just about your feelings for me?"

haechan laughed, "my feelings? might i remind you that you were the one who kissed me full on the lips twelve days ago? what was that all about? i wanna talk about it, even though we said we wouldn't! i wanna talk about why you hate me so much. i wanna talk about why your emotions are so contradictive!"

your mouth hangs open as you sputter out a heated reply, but instead gets interrupted with a knock on the door.

"keep quiet, you damn teenagers! i don't need your petty fights at two in the morning!" with padded feet, the guest returns to his room and slams the door to emphasise his complaint. swallowing, your mind goes blank as it focuses only on one question.

"why do you want to know so much lee haechan? what are you gaining out of this? if it's not sabotaging, then what is it?!" you whisper, standing your ground as with the first argument.

your throat is clenched up, and your fists are balled up tightly with nails digging into your palm. your heartbeat races like a fast car and your breathing's laboured in the cold room. there's no movement for a second, though they feel like minutes on end as haechan struggles to answer your question.

"what is it, lee donghyuck?" you cry out again, the sparkle in your eyes shining brightly from the tears of your never-ending dispute. he wished it was from the moonlight, instead. he wished the two of you were laughing over the rim of wine glasses and sharing the mischievous glimmer of the moon in your eyes.

"it's nothing. don't mind it." the other turns to catch up on sleep, leaving you to bite your lip.

"now you're doing it, now you're the one doing it. just tell me, you dumbass!" you mumble, pulling on his pyjama sleeve and tugging you to him.

"i like you, okay! it's out there now, i like you a lot, but you make it feel like a crime to do it," haechan whispers, "whatever. fuck this."

"no- what- no, we'll talk this out." you propose, adjusting your grip on his wrist with the curl of your fingers.

the male shakes his head and snatches his arm back, "no, forget it, and i'd prefer if you left me alone, (y/n)."

even with the warmth of his body next to yours, your body felt frozen and stiff. even with the thick duvet cover over you, you felt out of place in the stale hotel room, with colour becoming black and white, they merge into grey as the moonlight shone without a care for your problems.

there's action on the balcony when your eyes flutter open in the morning, noticing the quiet way haechan observes those rushing to work as well as social distancing officers making their rounds.

his eyes look hopeful and youthful, different from the tired ones the night before, or rather, this morning. you hadn't forgotten the angry neighbour banging on the door, and you definitely hadn't forgotten about how much you've wounded haechan this morning.

with a soft knock, you let him know of your presence and you just miss the way his eyes soften at your bed hair and messy appearance. his gaze turns hard in a second as he turns back to the apartment across yours, the balcony door showing your reflection of how hesitant you were.

haechan wished he could take your hands in his and accept your apology in a heartbeat, but he stayed seated and waited for whatever you wanted to say.

"don't run off, please." there's a shameful hand on his shoulders, and he's dying to get up when he sees your downcast eyes in the reflection across the street.

"i was too caught up in getting department head that i... didn't consider other possibilities. even the possibility of you uhm... liking me. it's still a weird concept to me, especially with how much we bicker."

"i'm sorry i didn't stay to hear out your feelings and rather, i just talked over you instead. i'm not sure if you want to accept this or not, but i want to open up—about this, about your feelings and... i don't know how much i've masked my emotions, i just know that we need to communicate."

the doorbell interrupts your apology, but you internally thank the housekeeping for bringing breakfast for the two of you.

with silence over breakfast, you weren't sure how the other felt as he scoffed down the croissant and almost burned his tongue with the coffee he ordered.

[day 33]

the boy barely watches the television and instead, reads over the article you were working on. seeing as it was already there when he logged on, he skimmed through it out of curiosity, finding that you were rephrasing the messy typos and sentences frantically on your notes.

haechan never forgot the way you were typing away on the laptop, eyes reading and rereading the sentences to make sure they made sense, to make sure they were clear to the reader.

the argument had taken a toll on you, too. he sees it in the way your eyes sink when your words turn out choppy and lacking, he sees it in the way you lug your body to the bathroom after a late night, he sees it in the way you struggle to hold your smile while attending an interview.

'haechan. you confuse me. i'm not...' the note below it trails off, piquing his curiosity at what it had in store.

'haechan.' big and bold letters it wrote, with a few dozen question marks below it. your writing skills shine through even in an informal note about your self-proclaimed rival, each line prompting the other to read more.

'you confuse me. i'm not sure what you're at but, it doesn't seem natural for you to tag along with someone you hate, right? that's what i was thinking too.'

'jeez, i remember hating when suyeon told me you were coming along. i didn't believe her one bit until she showed me your plane ticket and the hotel rooms next to each other. god, and when i came here, it was a day of interviewing before the damn government decided to close flights and force us into a room together.'

'i heard that other people had to be separated. i didn't know why we were the unlucky two that had to be put in a room together. i wished we didn't, almost. of course, you annoyed me when we first moved in. hogging the tv to no end, leaving your dirty underwear everywhere, running your mouth just like at our workplace.'

'i couldn't take it, maybe. sure, my brother has similar antics, but there was just something about you that just set me off, you know? i wouldn't have thought it was the opposite, or at least, i think so.'

'i'm counting the days. day 17 and i'm not sure why i feel this bubbling feeling inside me. of course, there's anger—i'm sure it's there, but there's also this other thing i get whenever i look at you.'

'my heart clenches up, and my hands become clammy, but it couldn't be a crush, right? i would've wasted my breath shouting, and my strength whacking your shoulder.' that makes haechan chuckle and look over at you where the soft light dances over your face.

'and then i started imagining. how would your arms wrap around me? how would your infuriating laughter, which somehow turned out to be so contagious, feel in the crook of my neck? yikes, that was cheesy.'

'what would it feel like if we fell in love for one night? where would you bring me and what would we eat? would we make out in your car like unruly teenagers?'

'what would it be like to love you? it's dumb, isn't it? i don't know. i've liked this bickering thing we had going on, and it's amusing to see you one-up me. i'm not sure if i want that to change and i'm not sure if you want us to, either.'

'maybe i'm wrong, and i'm the only one in this thing. this is so stupid, writing while he's sitting next to me. i'll regret this, maybe. goodnight.'

haechan sighs, closing the device in thought, confused at the words he wasn't exactly supposed to read. had you done this on purpose? he was sharing the laptop with you...

the boy brushed it off, placing the laptop on the vanity before adjusting your side of the duvet, hoping he could find the right words. with hesitant steps, he keeps to his side of the bed, thinking, thinking, thinking.

when he couldn't no more, haechan fell into the spell of slumber in the comfortable hotel room.

[day 34]

"tea?" he asks from the bathroom as the door clicks behind you, returning from the short hotel walk with a new keychain hanging from your sling bag.

"yeah sure, thanks."

the water runs as he fills up the kettle as the constant whir of the aircon and the conversation on the television keeps you company in the vast quietness of the room.

you weren't sure if you should say anything, but when you saw the dishevelled appearance of your roommate, you knew you had to bring up the argument and apology.

"haechan, about our... feelings. do you want to talk about them?" you whispered, a reply reaching your ears in the form of his spoon against the porcelain mug.

haechan hands you the drink wordlessly, sitting on the chair at the vanity before sipping cautiously at the tea. there are unexchanged glances between the two of you before he sighs at your expectant hand tapping the sheets.

"i think it's about time we did," he mumbled, dragging the laptop off the wooden table with anxiety. the other opened it without saying anything, catching you by surprise when the mouse hovers over your note.

"hae- donghyuck! no! what the hell?"

he holds up a hand and clicks on it anyway, making your heart drop to your stomach as he turned the device towards you.

"read the bottom." haechan whispers as you pull the laptop closer to you, settling it on your lap as he observed your expressions carefully.

'i read it, i'm sorry.' you look at him and lift up a hand to prepare to whack him, a defeated sigh escaping you before you carried on.

'was it wrong to read it? of course, and i cannot apologise more for doing shit like that when we still have unsolved tension between us in this small ass room. it was incorrect, but.'

'do you feel the same as me? is bickering all we have to do? why can't we work anything out? they're the questions i keep asking myself after i read your letter.'

'i guess i was too caught up in the fight and not wanting to be the loser that i... can't deny that i've never thought about wanting to get to know you, even if you were that sought out to be my destined enemy.'

'when we fought earlier, you kissed me. i know we said not to mention it, but, uhm, it was good. i liked it. i'm not sure if the reason why you did it was because of the reason you mentioned in the note, but at the time, i assumed it was to shut me up. i thought something would happen after, though you pushed me away and apologised right away.'

'it was a far off dream that i had, but i think it was after i bandaged your foot. you said that you didn't know what was going on in my mind, and i told you.'

'it was like, i was granted an insight into an alternate world, another universe where you didn't feel the strain, where you legitimately assumed i was going for your position.'

'you scoffed when i confessed, right then and there, on day 9. i was counting, too, and it was a scary, confusing dream. i think that's why i held it off as long as i could until your words puzzled and angered me further because you just didn't get it.'

'you scoffed and told me to get lost, pushing on my shoulders where we fought on the balcony for everyone to see. you never spoke to me, you never mentioned my article nor the interviews. we never joked over wine, and we always kept to our side of the bed.'

'i was convinced that heaven wanted me to stay away from you and your heart. maybe it was broken too many times, and you had someone up there looking out for you.'

'i feel like i'm copying off the textbook of some greek mythology starter pack, but i'm for real! no kidding.' you smiled, looking at him with nervous eyes at the small joke he put in.

'i guess whoever put that dream in my sleep really wanted us not to be together because i think i would've told you i liked you on the spot itself. i let my conscious get the best of me.'

'i know this is a lazy way of conveying my feelings, and i wished i could do it with words, but i feel like you wouldn't believe me otherwise. i rushed it this morning when you went on your morning walk around the hotel and when you let me know of your stroll in a soft voice, i wanted nothing more than to get you in my arms as we wake up to the housekeeping service.'

'i didn't want any more tension between us, and i didn't want to be interrupted by your alarm while we avoid each other more. it hurts seeing you escape the room in haste. you said it was weird for me to tag along with someone i hate, too, and that someone was you. i guess you found out why.'

looking up, you found him right in front of you, mouth dry from his reply to your letter. with a gulp, you leaned forward to meet his lips halfway.

"i'm sorry to whoever's up there," he whispers, prompting a grin and a laugh out of you.

the laptop is forgotten on the bed as haechan situates himself over you, clutching your shoulder gently while his lips move quickly, fast to make up for lost time.

"wait wait, wait, you're not playing me, are you?" you mumble in return, reluctantly pulling away while witnessing the way his eyes soften at your guard still up. haechan shakes his head forlornly, tongue pressing up against the side of his mouth nervously.

"no, i'm not, (y/n)," he says quietly with as much sincerity he can muster, removing his hand from your shoulder with a forced smile.

"okay." there's a shakiness to your voice, but when you bring his lips back to yours, it gives you a rush of confidence. your skin is burning up, and your hands can't stop wandering as his lips capture yours, repeatedly moving against yours like a trance.

you grant haechan access to your mouth with a whimper, melting into his embrace as his arms wrap tighter around your figure. his eagerness lingers when he pushes forward, straddling your lap as his leg nudges the laptop.

"wait, hyuck, wait, the laptop!" you joke, placing the device on the floor before getting back into the kiss with just as much fervour. within a minute or so, the other breaks away to say the words you so hated to hear:

"we... we need to talk. we can't just kiss the fight off, although i very much like to," haechan murmurs the last part, making you stifle a smile.

you nod quickly, repeating the word "okay" like a robot. your hands naturally travel from his arms down to his fingers, and you clutch them like your life depended on it.

"we have... established, that i like you, correct?" haechan whispers, scooting closer as his tea-ridden breath surrounds you. from here, you could even smell the buttered croissant he ate this morning.

it made you smile, something simple as that.

"why- why are you laughing (y/n)?" he asks anxiously, eyes darting to find the reason why you found this so funny.

"no. no no no, i'm thinking of... the croissant you ate just now, and," you sigh, resting your head on his broad shoulder.

"i'm thinking of the way your eyes light up when you show me the articles you idolise so much, and i'm thinking of the way you cuddle up to me whenever we watch stranger things."

"i'm thinking of the way you thought i wouldn't give you a chance, even though i've been pondering on the same thing as you. i'm thinking of the things that make up lee haechan, lee donghyuck. yes, you like me, and yes i like you, but i guess i haven't told you the reason."

"i hated you, i really did. i found every reason to convince my mind to hate you. gaining trust, signing up for events you didn't know shit about, sucking up to the seniors, stealing my friends when they didn't know your personality. the personality i didn't even want to know because i was too busy in my little bubble."

"assuming you'd want to get department head was the cherry on top, because why else would you want to tag along? that was the factor that convinced me and confirmed my suspicions from day one."

you grunt in opposition, clearly not liking the truth that was spilling from your lips. haechan deserved to know, however. you kept your eyes trained on his lap where his hands were holding yours in support, crumbling from the blindness that caused your hatred.

"so from then, the plane ride, immigration, the cab to the interview place, the cab back, the hotel room, my hatred for you boiled over." you listed, voice breaking as you looked haechan in the eye.

"it was stupid of me to assume, to assume the worst of you when i didn't even know you. i wasn't even sure why i felt so bitter looking at you, but the way you acted, the way you whined, worked me up so much that i figured that was how you were."

"now when i'm sitting here with the curtains drawn, i can see why you're so attractable and easy to talk to and easy-going and bright that my friends keep talking to you."

"i can see why the seniors turn to you because you're reliable and hardworking without uttering a single word."

"i can see why you wanted to hop on this flight with me because you're always curious about the world and how you can expand your skill set."

and as you said word after word, haechan observes you with a soothing hand against your forearms. his eyes shine for a different reason, for the lost time he could've had if the two of you didn't have this massive barrier. a massive barrier that's been up for the longest time.

brick by brick, the wall is being torn down. as you hold haechan's face in the stillness of the room, you feel closer to him than you've ever felt and his tears match your frustrated ones.

choking on sobs, delayed apologies were all you could whisper.

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry, really. we fought so bad that day, and i was so goddamn insensitive..." you sigh, swallowing a lump when his hand reached up to wipe the tears. with a blocked nose, you breathe shakily as housekeeping interrupts the moment.

you nod towards the door as he stood up slowly to reveal the same housekeeping girl. she cleaned up the bathroom and wardrobe quietly as the two of you stood awkwardly in the small space. she had left the sheets since everyone was practically stuck in, anyway.

haechan nudges you toward the door with a shove, shooting the same housekeeping girl a small smile and a bow as an apology to the previous run-in.

"he confessed his feelings?" she inquired softly, noticing the tear marks on your face.

you bit your lip, "yeah."

"that's good, he's finally not a coward." she laughs, folding the used towels and placing them with her.

you leaned against the door, asking for an explanation with your puzzled look.

"he was someone i liked, before. we had classes back in high school. it was just a dumb crush, honestly." the housekeeping girl shrugs, resting her head on her fist in thought.

"i think he liked me, and i did too, but we didn't do much except for exchange looks and flirt because both of us were just too scared." she shakes her head and adjusts the disinfectant spray bottle, fidgeting with the nozzle.

"i'm glad he had enough courage to admit his feelings."

nodding along to her statement, she bids you farewell as her figure fades with each step, leaving you with a sense of calmness to the end of this situation.

[day 38]

"is... is this okay?" haechan asks, arm hovering over your body while waiting for your confirmation. you smile and nod, sinking into his side as you venture in the third season of stranger things together.

"don't you think we should be working on our articles?" you whisper, looking up at him from where you were with raised eyebrows.

the boy opens and closes his mouth in thought, gesturing to the television with an exaggerated expression.

"stranger things, ma'am."

you click your tongue and sigh with a smile, turning back to the show as you try to relax for an online interview in a few hours.

[day 39]

"what do you say about my set-up?" haechan nudges you, proud of the hangout area he prepared on the balcony. although small, he had no trouble making it look comfortable.

with a smile, you pop open the wine to celebrate the last scheduled interview for the trip, clinking glasses with haechan in the setting sun.

the country you were supposed to return to was slowly opening up flights for those stranded overseas and as refreshing as a different environment was, you missed home and the warmness of it.

you missed the office and your desk. hell, you even missed the mediocre coffee from the pantry.

with the last of the wine finishing, haechan pours half into your glass and the other into his, clinking one last time before you one-shot the beverage.

the high of the alcohol is gradually brought down by the mellow atmosphere and colours of twilight. as pink and orange cross over on the horizon, haechan mumbles a low "c'mere" to you in the darkness.

you hum in response and get up from your seat, bringing a pillow with you as haechan shifts to make space. sinking naturally into his arms, you sigh while you try to contain a smile full of content.

"this is nice," you admit, the corners of your lips disobeying your command, prompting you to shoot him a smile. haechan nods against your hair, a comfortable arm around your waist while you trace the tan skin of his arm.

the other taps your waist repeatedly, turning in response as he whispers out a question that makes your heart melt.

"can i kiss you?" you grin, slipping a hand around his neck and pulling him in right away. haechan's caught by surprise, laughing into your lips and striving to savour the moment as much as he could.

a shout from across the hotel distracts you from the kiss. looking up, you realise it was the apartment resident opposite you shooting you a 'rock on' gesture.

"you guys are not fighting anymore! congrats!" you both stifle a snort as you wave back to the resident, sighing in relief when their balcony door slides shut.

"should we go inside, m'lady?" haechan giggles, replying in the form of a nod, cleaning up the area while you head in.

[day 41]

"i didn't think they'd be letting flights in so early," you mumble, folding your clothes neatly as your vision shifts to haechan... shoving his fair share of apparel into his luggage.

"donghyuck... what the hell?" you roll your eyes, shoving the boy softly as you took over the task at hand. switching personalities almost immediately, haechan fakes an interview segment with exaggerated tones.

"see, everyone, this is how you convince someone to do the work for you," the boy lays on the bed with a satisfied expression, "now i don't have to do anyth- ow!"

"if we ever live together, maybe i should punish you by doing the laundry and then folding it," you grunt, working at the speed faster than you expected while you fold shirt after shirt.

"are you proposing we move in together?" haechan peeks through an open eye, curiosity dripping from his tone. he tried to feign nonchalance but awaiting your answer felt like a weight on his heart.

your next words lifted that weight, a seemingly invisible force bringing his upper body off the bed as he stares at you in shock.

"maybe, not now but... in the future, maybe," you mumble the last part, focusing on the clothes to prevent the male from seeing the fluster on your face.

"for real?" haechan sits up, biting his lip to contain his excitement as your confirmation.

"we'll be all stupidly domestic and shit, and i'll say i love you five years from now before you go off for work if you want that and stuff," your voice goes lower and quieter, especially towards the end, biting off way more than you could chew.

"aw! i love you too!" haechan gushes, bringing you into an embrace as your hands go limp, scrambling to explain your emphasis on the 'future'.

"d-donghyuck, i meant the future, not now..." you manage to spit out, hoping you need not answer his queries any more. your mind blanks out at the current situation, wishing you hadn't said those dumb things.

he grins into your neck, "i know, i'm just answering for future me."

you groan and escape the hug with a roll of your eyes, "yuck, too cheesy!" the boy just lets out a laugh, watching the way you fold his clothes despite your initial annoyance.

[day 42]

suyeon switches between the two of you in disbelief, finger crooked at the ambiguity of "we like each other".

"wha-" suyeon doesn't get the chance to finish the sentence before you shoot her a thumbs up, grabbing haechan by the arm and your stuff with the other.

you were happy to leave the office after a quick debrief since you two had reported to the office right after arriving at the airport, relieved when you heard he'd spare a few more days for your articles to be cleaned up.

"so, (y/n), what would you like to do now?" haechan looks at you through the reflective material of the elevator, observing the nervous wringing of your fingers.

you're glad for the material protecting your face because there's a smile that you struggle to keep as his soft, gentle voice carries through the quiet space.

the anxiety ends when the lift sounds, prompting your eyes to trail down his arm. your hand moves on its own accord, grabbing his last finger with yours as you proceed into the lift sheepishly, not missing the way haechan's eyes show his bright smile behind the mask.

"maybe i'll get to know you more, lee donghyuck."

haechan lets out a gasp, "have you not learned about me enough? scandalous."

you feign a punch in his direction, the luggage beside you tripping over its wheels due to your swift movement. the only response you get is a giggle from the other as he tightens his pinky around yours, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek right above your face mask just as the elevator doors open.

"man, i really do want to punch you now," you mutter as you let haechan lead you, wanting nothing more than to rest in the arms of your enemy-turned-friend? enemy-turned-someoneyoulike?

you weren’t exactly sure.

he doesn't answer during the walk to the main road, nor the ride back to your home, the only constant thing being the way he admires your profile in the taxi, shrugging when you counter with a playful "what?".

"nothing," haechan grins.

[there are more days to come]

sure, day forty-one may not have been the day you fell in love with haechan, nor the day where he outwardly claims you as his lover.

but, taking it slow never hurt anyone, either.

you know it in the way he tells you he can't go in unless he's invited and you see it in the way he asks if he can switch the television on while you prepare some drinks.

like the hotel, you know it in the way he asks if he can kiss you and the way he deepens his kisses with caution.

you appreciate it in the way he quickly apologises for a personal question, while visibly relaxing as you brush it off with a smile.

with hours pass, day forty-two becomes day forty-three, and haechan remains as chivalrous as always.

days pass, and you submit your articles. weeks pass, and you get to know the boy more and more. months pass, and you feel his love in the way he plays with your fingers in the dark and pulls you close under the sheets.

even if you hadn't acknowledged the love between the two of you, that note you wrote half-drunk matched the way you felt now—with how your heart clenches up and with how your grin never leaves your face with haechan around.

there are more days to come with lee haechan, lee donghyuck, even if it meant getting stuck together in a hotel room with unsaid words.

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cassyapper · 4 years ago

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OKAY IVE ACTUALLY PLAYED TWO SESSIONS SINCE MY LAST POST SO IM GONNA COMBINE THEM HERE SORRY FOR THE LENGTH BUT,,IVE COME SO FAR I DONT WANNA STOP NOW

this is gonna be very messy cause i WILL be jumping back and forth as things come back to mind so uhh pls enjoy this absolute ramble <3

anyway. i continued playing omori and boy do i have some Thoughts

so first session; i went through the pyre(something i forgot the full name sob) forest/sprout mole village/sweetheart’s castle in one go and let me TELL YOU. DOING THAT WAS FUCKING INSANE I WENT NUTS holy shit.

so anyway.

pyre forest!!!! the lil race against the big spider coming after u for disturbing the smaller spiders mechanic was very fun i had a lot of fun figuring out the best routes to take. i know normally mechanics like that lead to ppl getting frustrated cause u have to keep retrying but i had a lot of fun!!!! sum annoyance but good natured type, th kind that just makes u try harder u know? i just enjoyed it JKFN;FN; candles in the foggy forest....now That is an aesthetic

the rare bear scared the fuckin shit out of me i remember it didn’t attack me straight away so i was like “aw (:” but then when i press x on him it takes me to a BATTLE SCREEN AND SUDDEN THAT MF IS TERRIFYING I WAS LIKE WHWHWHWHWKJDNJ. very funny i honestly wished i recorded my reaction

also omori is afraid of drowning...................................i am breathing heavily. i think whatever happened to mari is related to at least one of the things omori is scared of. so either heights, spiders, or drowning it seems. spiders doesnt seem super likely as a contributor to her death, and while falling from a height is more realistic, such a senseless way of dying doesnt seem to rlly fit ? with the vibe i get from the kiddos in the real world. which makes me think maybe drowning/otherwise suffocating is how she died...but we’ll see. also due to the forgotten library part, we know omori explicitly feared spiders/drowning before mari died so it’s also probable im jus talking out my ass here but still,,,,thoughts

also this motherfucker?

literally fucking terrifying. IT’S BODY IS MADE OF SUCC’D SPROUT MOLES...i still have no idea what exactly it was doing to them but jesus h christ!!!! evil and fucked up. do not feel bad for curbstomping it

sprout mole village!!!! very cute, im v excited to send that one dude his brother’s care package. i like how, when theyre not lost, sprout moles can be real endearing lil guys,,,theyre not my fav lil enemies but (:

also for some reason omori is the first game ive played where i really care about getting achievements ? so i literally did the back and forth on my save file just to get all the season sprout mole achievements JKDJFJ;. i ended up sticking w spring tho before moving on for real cause spring is my fav season irl (:

also i felt SO BAD for cutting down that one sprout mole’s chistmas tree he was just trying to celebrate but i wanted to see that present and coincidentally becoming a christmas ruiner was an achievement so all’s fair in love and war i suppose

ALSO. th fuckin plant monster thing under the scientist sprout mole’s room. major little shop of horror vibes from the design, absolutely adored it!!!!! originally i did just cut the wire holding the piano over it, ending it in one go, but i was very curious abt it so i reloaded a save file to actually fight it and

i know it only spread that gas to make the kiddos happy cause being happy reduces attack i think ? it decreases attack/defense but seeing the kiddos smile so much was nice (:

however

omori...sunny....son boy.........u good ?

and now. sweetheart

the way the sprout moles completely adore and depend on sweetheart gives me such awful evil vibes and combined with such a luxurious background was fucking incredible

sweetheart herself, speaking of. bitch (sorta affectionately, certainly not derogatory)

i talked to every sprout mole in the audience before taking my seat and i literally dont know why. even when i picked up the pattern of where the unique dialogue could be found (usually the sprout moles farthest right) i still talked to all of them......just in case ? i have no idea. i dont know why i did that. i feel it’s important that i note it tho

LMAO SO WHEN SPROUT MOLE MIKE DID THE MINUTE OF SILENCE FOR YE OLD SPROUT MOLE

I LITERALLY FELT SO FUCKING BAD LMAO I WAS LIKE OH MY GOD NO!!!!!! I DID THAT!!! I KILLED HIM!!! OH MY GOD!!! I WONDER HOW AWKWARD OMORI KEL HERO AND AUBREY FELT IN THE AUDIENCE HOLY SHIT THEY HAD FRONT ROW SEATS TO SPROUT MOLE MIKE’S MOURNING!!! MY GOD FJKFN;;

also sprout mole mike describing 3′7″ inches as ”towering” was the FUNNIEST shit i have ever seen. also i have to wonder, since sweetheart made up the whole show of sweetheart’s quest for hearts in the first place, if she was seriously down to marry a sprout mole if one suited her fancy. jus v funny to me honestly. SPEAKING of sweetheart’s dating patterns I NOTICED THOSE FEM SKELETONS IN THE DUNGEON!!!!! BI SWEETHEART!!!! SHE’S JUST AS DOWN FOR GIRLS AS SHE IS BOYS

i know TECHNICALLY not everyone is in the dungeon for failing to be a good enough suitor but STILL...COME ON. THIS WAS BEFORE WE KNEW THAT. SWEETHEART BI I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

anyway

when the lights when out and lightning struck the third contestant, i knew Immediately something was gonna go down. and when the mustache sprout mole was like “oh yes!! u!! in the striped pjs!! u absolute beast ur perfect!!!” i KNEW hero had just been selected as the replacement i was goign completely fucking nuts i was like OH MY GODNFNG; HIS HEART IS ALREADY TAKEN BY MARI!!!!!!! STOP

i ended up taking so many screenshots during this part cause i was going feral so here take a glance just cause i love, uh, hero

OUR HERO IN SHINING ARMOR DJLBH;KFJB

also GOD FUCKING DAMMIT IM SHORTER THAN HERO

hero shaking on the stage when he was introduced...oh my HEART....IM SO FOND FOR THIS BOY WTF!!!!! DKJDN;N

this is not really NEWS to me since it’s implied hero is tall but like come ON..... sorry just every time i find out a character is explicitly taller than me i need to huff about it, moving on,

HERO FUCKS

sorry i just have so many screenshorts during this aprt cause i was going fucking crazy but

literally terrifying! sweetheart bathes in that shit!! christ!

is blood good for ur skin? i imagine, so long as like...gore isnt in it and it’s solely blood it cant be BAD necessarily......but good ? regardless very fucked up. besides the fact that well, uh, BLOOD, blood is also sticky as hell. ur telling me sweetheart willinglhy bathed in that shit? disgusting. at least thin it out

anyway I HAD SO MUCH FUN DOING THE PUZZLES AT SWEETHEART’S CASTLE....FROM THE DUNGEONS TO THE KITCHENS TO THE BALLROOM TO THE LIBRARY TO THE GARDENS JUST EVERYTHING!!!! IT WAS SO FUN I ENJOYED FIGURING IT OUT SO MUCH IT WAS LITERALLY DELIGHTFUL...I LOVE THIS GAME SO MUCH THE GAMEPLAY IS SO FUCKING EPIC I LITERALLY HAVE SO MUJCH FUN.......OH MY GOD I JUST. INCREIDBLE!!!! FUCK

also the lil sir maximus bit.........i honestly felt really awful over having to kill them ): i think i even tried running once but it wouldnt let me...it hurt man ): they were just a family....

um but anyway,

i think it was rlly sweet how aubrey protested to the wedding cause she was worried abt sweetheart,,,like i cant rlly explain it idk how to put it into words,,like sweetheart is clearly not mentally well and having an episode, and aubrey being the only one to say “hey what ur doing is self-destructive and isolating” just mmmh. she cares a lot,,,and *i* care aubrey

also sweetheart’s battle theme fucking SLAPPED...SO GODDAMN HARD IM STILL QUAKING OVER IT....FUCKING BANGER YO!!!!!! INCREDIBLE

ah but alas

BASIL........I NOTICED THAT IT WAS HIS GHOST/SHADOW DURING THE EXIT FROM OTHERWORLD AS WELL BUT JUST FUCK

im so worried about basil ):

and it being so obvious that none of the others can see...........them asking omori if he’s okay.....oh my god. i go nuts

and then...the forgotten library part

i literally cried, again, oh my fucking god

these kids loved each other so much they ADORED the time they spent with each other and im QUAKING to know WHAT HAPPENED TO MARI......HOW DID THE FALLOUT GO. I NEED TO KNOW I NEED TO KNOW I NEED TO KNOW

i know there are multiple endings to this game and on god i am not QUITTING until i get the happiest ending there is for these kids im literally a goddamn fuckign mess oh my god

MARI SHWOING UP IN THE LIBRARY AT ONE POINT AND LEADING OMORI...........IM LTIERALLY GOIGN INSANE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD HE LOVED HIS SISTER SO MUCH HE’S SO CLEARLY LOST WITHOUT HER I CANT FUCKING DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. I NEED TO KNOW I NEED TO KNOW I NEED TO KNOW

GOD

okay sorry i just. ive said ti before but the grief in this game is so real and palpable and it aches, it aches so bad. also the white egret orchids in the library...i see u

but regardless.... session two real world electric boogaloo

LOVE that kel is like “so i need to run errands but u wanna come with me right? of course u do!” like fuck i rlly do. kel is just so delightful i would literally do anything to spend time with him

ALSO i noticed u can just refuse to open the door both times kel’s knocked now and it makes me wonder....if u could choose to ignore kel ? and then venture out urself or just ? i wonder what would even happen if u chose to not open the door. im CERTAINLY not doing it myself at the very least not this playthrough but i am curious...i bet that’s how u get a bad ending, by not talking w kel

but anyway....

aubrey and her gang not saying anything in the pizza parlor........i jus think abt that is all

ALSO!! pet rocks!!!!!!!!! LOVE this lil thing it’s so cute. jus rock paper scissors it babey

speaking of lil bits, love all the mini quests in the real world...it’s just rlly fun and builds up this cute lil town........it also makes me think that whatever happened to mari cant have been anything except an accident, bc no one comments on what a tragedy it was to omori. like if it was murder, there’s no way such a horrific situation wouldnt engulf the town for a bit and sweep over it for weeks at least, but that just doesnt seem to have happened. this is def me reading too into it tho;; point is neighbors nice (: also i got the seashell necklace and i go apeshit

ALSO......THE FUCKING...........CHURCH. I VISITED WITH KEL ON A COMPLETE WHIM CAUSE I WAS CURIOUS IF THE PASTOR WOULD TALK MORE ABT AUBREY BUT NO. INSTEAD HE TALKS ABT THE WEIRD VIBE FORM THE GRAVEYARD HE’S GETTING!!! AND THE DUDE WHO CHILLS IN THE GRAVEYARD SAYS SHIT ABT THE SPIRITS GETTING READY FOR SOMEONE TO JOIN THEM!!!! BITCH WAHT THE FUCK

THERE’S NOF UCKING WAY THIS ISNT ABOUT BASIL. THERE IS NO!!! WAY!!!! I SWEAR ON GOD IF BASIL DIES I WILL LOSE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ESP CAUSE THERE IS LITERALLY NO OTHER WAY HE COULD DIE EXCEPT SUICIDE THAT’S WHAT IT HAS BEEN IMPLYING OVER AND OVER I GO NUTS I GO APESHIT NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK

OKAY SORRY I JUST. HHHHHHHHHHH

baby has acquired baby

kel’s family is rlly cute,,,,v heartwarming. i trust them

i do worry abt like...the stark difference between recognizing kel’s accomplishments and hero’s...i just idk. i just keep thinking abt that bit in kel’s story abt hero’s depression when his parents focused on hero and ignored him, and i just. kel’s family is good People but i worry if kel has a good support system...i jus........): i am watching

ahh THE BASIL MISSING PART MADE MY HEART LITERALLY FUCKING DROP..I WAS SO FUCKING PANICKED I WAS LIKE OH MY GOD THIS IS IT BASIL IS DEAD

THANKFULLY HE WASNT BUT HOLY GOD HOW THAT WHOLE SITUATION PANNED OUT MADE ME GO NUTS!!!!!!! BASIL...AUBREY...HER GANG.......FUCK OH M YOGD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

THANK G O D I SNOOPED AROUND KEL’S HOUSE BEFORE LEAVING I WOULD HAVE H A T E D TO FIGHT THEM ALL AT ONCE IM GLAD I WAS ABLE TO JUST PEPPER SPRAY THEM JESUS CHRIST

oh my god kim like asking for aubrey all concerned before deciding to trust her and leaving.....kim i diagnose u with lesbain

the whole fucking. basil almost drowning scene. i seriously feel like ive changed like as a person over it. i am thinking . i am thinking. i am only evee thinking about mari and how omori just loved her so much and how the thought of her gave him strength. th pic of her ghost holding omori’s hand in the water made me cry

MMMM BUT. HERO!!!

I DIE I DIE I DIE HE’S SO PRETTY FUCK ALSO HIM PICKING UP BASIL WOOOOOOOO THIS IS WHAT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THAT’S WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT YEAHHHHHHHH

god i feel so bad about leaving aubrey tho. shes so clearly not okay and she so clearly did not mean to push basil in and oh my GOD I JUST...PLEASE....PLEASE CAN WE JUST TLAK TO HER I NEED TO TLAK TO HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I NEED TO FUCK

the ghosts of omori and aubrey on the swings made me cry out like i had been physically assaulted

AHH BUT THEN TAKING BASIL HOME AND WHILE HE’S IN HIS BED HE JUST SAYS “oh sunny...there’s not way out of this...is there?” I LITERALLY GO BUCKWILD APESHIT INSANE STUPDI!!!!!! BASIL YOURE PUTTING UP A LOT OF ALARMING FLAGS HERE!!! PLEASE DO NOT FUCKING DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK. CHRIST. HELL. SHIT. THIS GAME IS DRIVING ME FUCKING CRAZY

GOD

oh my god but the day ending with hero and kel sleeping over at omori’s house...im kdnd im jkdim im not uhm okay THEY BUILT A BLANKET FORT PLEASE..I LOVE THEM

goddd hero going into the piano room....playing sum........and then asking omori abt the song he and mari used to play on violin...and then THE TITLE SCREEN MUSIC STARTS PLAYING....HI. HI HELLO HI YOU CANT FUCKIGN DO THAT HI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOUFBJFGJNGN;EJNE; IM GOIGN NUTS

also the name omori comes from the piano.............interesting...i wonder why sunny likes being called omori in the dreamscape...

god but omori not having a srs hallucination cause he’s w his friends and he feels safe...im gonna sob

However. i did glance into the bathroom mirror. AND INSTEAD OF THE EYE MF IT’S A DISTORTED AS HELL GHOST MARI???IM SO FUCKIGN SCARED. IM SO SCARED. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK? CREEPY AS HELL!!!

ohh my god this GAME

so finally i ended up in whitespace again. do NOT like that omori is completely alone in the world!!! what the FUCK!!!!!!!! I AM SO SCARED AT ALL TIMES. im literally about to go play sum more tho after dinner so i will see what happens. god i jsut......this game is so fucking good it has me by the balls dude. SO glad i decided to play it bruh

anyway thanks for reading all of this if u did, it’s an absolute monster ik and ur a real one

#cass cries #omori #omori spoilers #more like cass goes CRAZY this is so long #also id dint proof read this sorry </3

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imagineitup · 5 years ago

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scorpion king : scorpius malfoy x reader

request: omg so glad you’re taking requests again!! would you be able to write something where the reader asks the scorpion king to the blood ball (instead of polly 🤢)? hope you’re safe and healthy!!

a/n: i really, really hope u enjoy!! also this gif worked out mf perfectly so hd

- -

Scorpius is confused, bewildered; he’s beyond exhausted. The dark robes he wears itches against his skin, it’s too polyester and starched for comfort, and he aches for his familiar Hogwarts robes, or his wool cardigan; he needs something soft to remind him that there’s still light.

He’s stumbling through this world, this world that comes with nothing good and everything deranged. He feels like he can’t breathe, because Albus is dead. Harry Potter’s dead -- a scream cuts off his thoughts. People are dying, here.

This Scorpius, Scorpius thinks while looking down at his hands, has killed people. This Scorpius has tortured.

Yann Fredericks and Karl Jenkins confirm this, as they high-five him like he’s their friend. Somehow they’ve forgotten about all the years they’ve taunted him, and belittled him, and spit on his books after scrawling “Voldemort’s son” in bold letters on the back of his trunk.

And then there’s Polly Chapman. The same Polly Chapman, who has made it crystal clear that she wants nothing to do with either him or Albus. Even though she’s never directly said a mean word to Scorpius’s face, he knows she’s downright awful to Albus, and suddenly an intense, bitter dislike churns in his gut.

Yann and Karl nudge him, quickly. Scorpius looks up to see Polly staring at him, expectantly. So she’s still the same, after all, still disinterested and cool. But there’s something else there, too, and Scorpius realizes, with confusion, that it’s pride.

“What?” Scorpius ends up saying, because now his eyes have landed on something else, someone else, and he can’t breathe. There, standing a little to the side of Polly, is you.

He sags in relief and makes the motion to run to you. Yet just as his eyes soften and he’s about to bolt toward you, Yann hisses in his ear.

“Hey, Scorpion King. Are you taking her, or what?”

Scorpius doesn’t register what Yann’s said. He’s focused on looking anywhere but Polly, and that means looking at you. Maybe one of the reasons he can’t bring himself to run straight to you is because you’re not giving him your goofy smile, and as you lean against the wall, with your hair smooth and pristine, he realizes, disappointedly, that the smirk twisting up your lips is anything but familiar.

He catches the latter end of Polly’s sentence, “-- taking me to the Blood Ball.”

Scorpius is caught with disbelief. He chokes. “What?” He looks at Yann and Karl, then finally back at Polly. “You want me to take you to a ball?” He shakes his head definitely, stepping backwards. “No, no thank you.”

Polly blinks. The tilt of her chin lowers, and her upper lip quivers uncertainly; “No?” She recovers quickly, throwing an irritated look at Yann. “What is going on with you?” She sidesteps you and completely ghosts past, and maybe that’s because you’re clearly failing to stifle a giggle.

The three of them: Polly, Karl, and Yann leave, and Scorpius lets out a long breath of air.

He’s startled again, this time, by the sound of applause echoing through the halls. “Wow. Didn’t know you had it in you,” is what he hears, as he finally registers this as your voice. “Rumor was that you’ve been obsessed with beautiful Polly Chapman for years.”

Even with seeing the words leave your mouth, Scorpius still doesn’t recognize you. Your voice cuts straight through the air, almost sultry-like, and it sends an uneasy chill down his spine. You’re so different. Half of him wonders if this is even you, or maybe, instead, some demonic half-twin that you’ve forgotten to mention.

“I didn’t believe it, though.” You offer him a grin, but Scorpius is still not convinced. “I’m going to shoot my shot. Go with me to the Ball.”

A wave of exhaustion washes over him. He stumbles, losing his footing against the floor. He would be crashing any second, if you weren’t so quick to surge forward, catching his arm and gently draping it across your shoulders.

When he meets your gaze again, he’s surprised to see genuine concern written across your features. “You’re not alright. You’re acting strange.”

Scorpius blinks, dazed. “Is it that obvious?”

To add to his surprise, you laugh. It’s almost gentle, again, and nothing like the way you’d been portraying yourself earlier. “Yes, Scorpion King. It’s very obvious. For once in your life, you don’t seem like you’ve got everything put together.”

Ouch.

“I promise I’m more fun than Polly, though,” you tease, devilishly. “I’d give you a good time.”

Scorpius flushes. “Oh. I didn’t --”

“Scorpius, please,” you sigh, rolling your eyes. “Let loose, you’re so on edge.”

“You want me … to go to the ball with you?” He blinks, and the words feel strange on his tongue. “Like a date?”

You sigh frustratedly. “I like you, you like me. You don’t really like labels. You haven’t for years. But if that’s what you want, sure.”

Scorpius turns away from you after you say this. He just misses you. The real you. The you that likes to jump-scare him before morning breakfast, and the you who stands up on your tiptoes to ruffle his hair because he grew so much over the summer holidays, (taller even than you!), and he misses the you that falls asleep with your head tucked safely against his chest.

“I’ve picked out a dress, you know. It’s dark emerald, obviously, but it’s got some velvet undertones and black stitching. We could match. Be best dressed, win Blood Crown.”

Scorpius nods blankly.

It hurts him, pains him, to hear you say this. It doesn’t feel right. Not when he’s heard you tell him a million times that if you were to go to a ball, you’d wear a long black dress with gold stitching, and everything about this you is so much different than the other you he knows. He just wants to disappear.

Nothing’s ever easy, is it?

He stands up quickly, ignoring your protests as he walks away from you. And even so, walking away while knowing that the person he’s leaving isn’t really you, is still one of the hardest things he’s ever had to do.

- -

He sees you again, for real, this time, when you run into the Slytherin dorms and pull him into a huge hug.

This time he doesn’t see it, since it’s another of your infamous jump-scares. But this time he’s slow to turn around, terrified that he’s done something wrong, and that this won’t really be you. He won’t be able to handle the disappointment if that’s true. Yet when he carefully meets your gaze, it’s nothing like he fears. In fact, he can’t move. He can’t breathe.

You’re glowing, radiating happiness as you say something with an infectious grin, and Scorpius can’t help but stare and try to memorize your features.

Lively eyes. Soft hair. Cute nose. Soothing voice.

“Take a picture, Scorp,” you tease, poking him in the chest, “it’d last longer.”

Scorpius hums as he laughs, and half of him realizes that maybe, if that other you liked him, maybe this you would like him, too.

“Go out with me,” Scorpius blurts out. “Please. I don’t want to lose you again.”

Your expression blanks, and then toggles between elation and joy. As quickly as that happens, your features soften as you register the rest of what he’s said. “Scorp, I don’t know what happened,” you murmur, looking into his eyes, “but you’re not losing me. Promise.”

Scorpius gazes at you uncertainly. “Promise?”

You grin at him. “I already told you. I promise. And yes, I’ll go out with you, you dummy.”

Scorpius smiles and wraps you into a hug, melting into you. “I missed you so much.”

“Me, too.”

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sunsetsover · 5 years ago

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underrated parts from last night:

the entire ben and bobby scene :-( i love them sm :-(

the absolute BANTER of them being like ‘what do u fancy?’ ’do u have to ask?’ and ben leaning into callum’s space so he can kiss him and then being like ‘lets go shag in an empty coffin 🤪’ and callum’s disapproving tut like he’s disgusted but not really disgusted and ben looking at callum like he hung the sun in the sky :-(

jay and lola’s little faces when ben was like ‘this better be worth it’

the absolute devastating softness of ben’s voice when he says ‘pam’ :-(

callum’s face when he realized that that was pam. like it was immediately obvious that he not only felt very out of place, but he knew that however this situation went and whatever ben did or didn’t tell her, it was going to be difficult. that it was going to be hard for ben, and depending on what was said, it was going to be hard for pam too. like you could just tell from the look on his face when ben was hugging pam that he knew straight away that this was not going to be easy, which is very telling of how well knows ben - he understands how much paul still means to ben, how much pam and les mean to ben, and how much what happened still affects him. and callum probably knew it was going to be hard on him too, bc i think the possibility of ben lying abt who callum was/their relationship was probably one of the first things that came to mind.

ben’s face when callum introduced himself to pam (esp that first second where he suddenly remembers that oh yeah, callum’s here too) because you can tell that ben’s just had the exact same realization that callum had, except he’s the one who’s now got to decide what to say, what to tell pam, and how to navigate this incredibly delicate situation with the least amount of upset.

CALLUM LOOKING ALL HAPPY THINKING BEN HAD TOLD PAM ALL ABOUT HIM FOLLOWED BY THE DEVASTATION OF HIM REALIZING THAT IT HAD JUST BEEN JAY. THE SAD LITTLE LAUGH AND SHAKE OF HIS HEAD AS IF HE WAS INTERNALLY GOING ‘OF COURSE IT WAS JAY, OF COURSE BEN HASN’T TOLD HER ABOUT YOU, DON’T BE SO STUPID’ THAT KILLED ME MORE THAN ANYTHING

the fact that ben hesitated and looked at callum when pam asked how they knew each other. like he really considered telling her the truth and being honest but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it :-( and then his immediate change in body language when he tells her they’re just mates, like his excessive nodding and awkwardly clearing his throat and running away to the bar - he was so obviously uncomfortable. he KNEW saying that was going to upset callum and clearly immediately felt bad but what else could he do? what else could he have said? he didn’t feel like he could tell pam the truth. he was between a rock and a hard place.

jay and lola’s shared ‘ben’s being a dumbass again’ look

THE FACT THAT CALLUM STAYED INSTEAD OF LEAVING LIKE I REALIZE IT WAS PROBABLY JUST FOR PLOT SO THEY COULD ARGUE LATER IN THE EP BUT IN MY HEAD HE STAYED BECAUSE HE WANTED BEN TO KNOW IT WAS OK THAT HE LIED ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND THAT HE WASN’T MAD :-(

ben and pam just sitting there holding hands while they talked bitch i’m CRYING

pam including callum in the conversation!! like she must have realized he was sitting there awkward and quiet bc obviously everyone there had history but him and made sure to include him :-(

the way ben looked at callum when pam brought up whitney. like it was SO obvious he wanted to say something or do something; that he wanted to reach out and comfort callum, support him, reassure him. because like... he didn’t know whether callum was gonna come out to pam or not, and ben knows that it doesn’t matter that he was in a safe environment surrounded by loved ones, that’s still a difficult thing to do! and even if he didn’t (which he didn’t, probably more for ben’s sake than his own tbh which is a whole nother can of worms) ben knows that his break up with whitney is still a difficult and raw thing for callum to talk about. like all of that on top of this incredibly awkward situation they were in and the fact that that callum was probably already upset like??? ben’s face in that moment said SO much

lola being the one to tell pam callum and whit aren’t together anymore so callum didn’t have to.... i love one (1) friendship

callum’s absolute lack of offence abt pam bringing whitney up.... like he’s literally an angel

pam saying ‘i’m sure you’re gonna find somebody else’ as opposed to saying ‘i’m sure you’ll find another woman’ or smth 😔✊🏻

callum and ben sneaking looks at each other when pam said ‘there’s a lid for every pot :-( ben’s his lid :-(

(plus ben catching himself looking at callum and forcing himself to look away and schooling his expression back into something more neutral like please)

lola and jay absentmindedly linking hands bitch that GOT me

jay repeatedly glancing at ben and callum when they were at the bar together like!!! he was worried about them!!

pam just generally being a nan and being like U HAVE TO COME VISIT i love her can she stay forever :-(

lola’s quiet support of jay when pam was asking him abt terry’s funeral :-( i love them so mf much

not underrated but callum understanding why ben didn’t tell pam about them and instead being more upset about the fact that ben had ignored him the whole time like :-( literally the kindest most understanding angel

who is no longer afraid to tell ppl when he’s upset and hurt and why! i love that growth!

the absolute domesticity of them talking abt callum struggling w money and the fact that callum didn’t seem to be that embarrassed and was honest abt the situation he’s in and ben not judging him at all like ! but the whole thing was still really tense and dramatic anyway bc of what they were arguing abt before lmao

pam watching the whole thing in the background like.... she Knows

lola trying to distract pam bc ben and callum are just straight up having a domestic at the bar and not being subtle at ALL and pam is just. Watching. and poor lola has to at least TRY to cover their dumbasses (+ pam having none of it and being like hang on i’m trying earwig here kddslkflskf)

how sad ben’s little ‘don’t be like that’ was despite him obviously trying to seem annoyed lmao :-( and the fact that he immediately jumped up and didn’t want callum to leave like he really hadn’t wanted to upset callum and he didn’t want him thinking he didn’t care but poor ben just didn’t know what to do and who to please and how to behave :-(

how tired callum must have been to just be like ‘just forget it’ and not only leave, be leave without saying goodbye to anyone like :-(

BEN’S SAD LITTLE FACE AS CALLUM WALKED AWAY LIKE SCREENSHOTS DO NOT DO IT JUSTICE AND I DON’T THINK ANYONE’S GIFFED IT BUT IT’S FUCKING HEARTBREAKING

pam watching the entire interaction like 👀

ben’s annoyed sigh at the end like he’s just !! annoyed but he’s annoyed at himself for upsetting callum and fucking up this entire situation like he’s in such an awkward and difficult position and he probably feels like he can’t do right for doing wrong and no matter what he said or did someone was gonna get upset and like :-( just wanna hug him tbh

anyways i cannot wait for tonights ep

thank u for ur time 💖💖

#ballum #eastenders #jay x lola #lola x jay #idk what their tag is sorry :-(#anyways i love my family #i cant wait to see callum talk to mick and ben talk to pam like ! im excited #*

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mommamouf · 5 years ago

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Major vent

Ok on some serious shit.

Me and my mother got into it BAD yesterday. I still have a lot of emotions from a lot of situations buried that I truly don’t want to address and here’s why.

She picks me up from work. I have a pretty great day at work. Then she starts complaining and I snapped. I always warn ppl ahead of time though. Do not start certain conversations with me if you aren’t ready to have them.

What that means is, if you’re not going to have an open mind and heart. Drop it. If you’re going to talk over me and not listen. Drop it. If you won’t speak honestly and clearly. DROP IT. But I’m always pushed into having these conversations because ppl think their right and I’m stupid.

Anywho we’re going at it and I mentioned how I was raped by my bd. (Side note: I never told my mom about it until a few years ago. It happens my senior year of highschool. She never knew how this relationship started with me and my bd she just knew one day I said this was my boyfriend. I didn’t tell her what happened until my daughter was 5 and we were being forced out of his house. This came up because me Nd my daughter were staying with my bd, me and him got into it. I got upset and I mentioned it after that his mom showed up and said we had 3 days to get out)

My moms response was “how did u get raped? You had a boy over who wasn’t supposed to be there.”

That fucked me up. So I’m like why tf does the how matter and she’s goes “when did you tell me”

YEARS LATER AFTER I CAME TO ACCEPTING WHAT HAPPENED AFTER making morbid jokes with my males friends and finally talking about it with my bd. Who never denied it. He just kicked us out because of it.

😤 so currently me and my mother aren’t speaking. She can act all tough and like she’s the big bad mom with no regret but some real shit was said in that conversation and I definitely broke down afterwards so I know she feels bad. And now I’m twice ass upset because I feel bad that I made her feel bad. I love my momma and I know she loves me but sometimes she can be really fucked up and she’s not the apologizing type. Or the comforting type. Not with me anyways. We’ve had this conversation maybe two and a half times and at no point have I ever been able to tell my MOM how that shit really made and makes me feel. My own mother. I just keep stuffing it back down hoping it goes away.

Forreal the last 8 years have been, complicated to say the least and it leaves me confused and unsure of myself.

I fell in love with a boy who didn’t love me back

Tried to move on and got raped because I was “trying to be nice” it doesn’t make sense to anyone because I had sex with him afterwards and he bacame my bf. Because I went to my ex for some clarity and he “didn’t understand” but at the time really just ignored the situation and didn’t want to be bothered with my emotions. I didn’t tell my mom because I was afraid she’d blame me 🤣and she did. So I just said fuck it. At least I wasn’t dragged in an alley and beat then raped, right. I got over it. I didn’t think I was traumatized or that it even affected me. Later on that same person got me pregnant, lied, then ran away. All the while talking shit and lying about me. So his family was under the impression that I was a lying hoe who was trying to get him to raise a baby that wasn’t his. Oh and let’s not forget that in between this I get my ex involved in the situation because I needed an emotional anchor. The ex who verbally and emotionally abused me, ignored me and also talked shit and lied to ppl about me and was living with a girl he had only dating for a month. The same girl that he told I might be pregnant by him (even longer story) just so he could get out of his relationship. When we had agreed not to tell anyone until we were sure. The same person who PROMISED he’d be here for my child, OUR child whether she was his or not. He made these promises before he became a possibility. The same person who choked me out because he was upset that I came to his home when HE INVITED ME OVER. We fought. He fucked up my back. Came in and out of my life. In and out of my daughters life. Also at this time I’m still arguing with my mother and sister everyday. EVERYDAY! During my pregnancy and after. And let’s not forget that during my pregnancy my circle fell completely apart. I lost close friends, my best friend and my favorite cousin started dating then got mad at me and ignored me thru the rest of my pregnancy and beginning months of my daughters life. Back to her father who also wanted to play a twisted game of double Dutch hopping in and out for her life for the first four years. Then finally sticking around for 2 years just to suddenly one day decide that being a father just wasn’t something he could do anymore. Even though I had to go thru the drama of his family bashing me publicly on the internet. And accusing me of all kinds of bullshit just so he wouldn’t be blamed. HASNT BEEN BLAMED FOR ANNNNYYY OF IT. Oh but what I can be fully 100% blamed for is not taking the best man I’ve ever had in my life and running away. He wasn’t just good with my daughter, he cared about her as well. He cared about me. We had the same weird interest, he made me laugh, he was tall, the perfect amount of cute and just flat out PERFECT. And what did I do? FUCK IT UP FOR A NIGGA THATS STILL PLAYING MF GAMES to this very gotdamn day. Why did I fuck it up? To put it simply I’m a dumb bitch.

So yeah you know what ALL of it is my fault because I’m a dumbass bitch.

But that’s just the quick version. One of these days I’ll write a book about it and name it. SHIT NOT TO DO !

But I take all of these emotions stuff them down. Remember that I am alive, healthy, and I am the creator of my own happiness. So I throw on my smile that has been damaged but still shines just as bright. I’m always willing to forgive and be forgiven. And I get back to being my goofy weird ass self. The only downside is that I drink a lot but even still that’s MY problem.

Plus there are those that have been thru worse so I’m good. I’ll make it thru.

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jurassicdaddy · 6 years ago

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So my wifey who’s not rly my wifey asked my girlfriend who’s not rly my girlfriend if she likes me back and I’m like bitch how fucking old are we again.

#like really #i thought weve established our relationship is platonic so why are you running around to girls you dont even know im into asking them #if they like me like its some middle school dance or some shit #like its a joke #i dont even actually like her like that but clearly youre jealous #like jesus if you want me to give you the time of day like that i would 100%#but youve made it clear you dont so whyre you nosing around #and maybe shes just looking out for my feelings and my best interest #but i havent told you to and you dont even know if i like this girl or not #like i dont even know if i do #girls are so F U C K I N G annoying #personal #ignore #im just frustrated #bc me and wifey are rly close and shes one of my best friends rn but youre rly gonna go behind me and do that #for why #theres no logical explanation for it #are you that afraid some girl is gonna come sweep me away or something #like jesus we all work together im not trying to get that mf messy

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creativitytoexplore · 4 years ago

Photo

[MF] Daffodils https://ift.tt/34Js2HQ

It was a beautiful morning and the smell of fresh coffee and and bagels wafted through the air. She could also smell daffodils but couldn’t see it anywhere. Mia wondered, why don’t I see the daffodils? Where is this beautiful smell coming from?

At first, when Mia woke up she had no clue where she was but it all started coming back to her. She vaguely remembered being in paradise retreat which is probably a fancy name for rehab.

How did she get herself here? She always thought she was going to be one of those people who is going to be ultra-successful and here she was in a rehab a.k.a. Paradise retreat.

Why can’t they just call things as is why do they have to give a politically correct name for everything?

She saw piece of paper next to her which was presumably the program for the coming few days. This feels more like a jail then a retreat!

07:00 am – wake up to the smell of coffee 08:00 am – yoga 09:30 am – shower and get ready for group discussions 10:30 am – Group discussion

Oh man! They also have group discussions she sighed aloud. She only knew these from whatever she saw in the movies where people sit in a circle and talk about things. Did she really have to do it?

Mia was so engrossed in her thoughts that she almost forgot the strange things that she experienced the previous night. Shaking herself of the feeling she got ready to grab her breakfast and got into her yoga pants.

She really enjoyed the yoga session. A lot more than she would ever want to ever acknowledge. Endorphins thanks to a good session made her glow and she was glad she made it to the session. Unfortunately her happy feeling did not last long, her room looked weirdly out of place. She constantly felt like someone was there but did not want it to be known that they are there. She decided to ignore the feeling and get to the shower.

The hot water falling on the skin made her feel very relaxed. She couldn’t stop feeling excited about how great the shower felt. She did not want to spend too much time in the shower because she had to get ready for the group discussion soon.

As soon as she got out of the shower and start dressing up in front of the mirror she noticed that her reflection was lagging behind her. She couldn’t stop herself from screaming really loudly. It was then she started screaming, she noticed that her reflection was blankly staring at her.

This must have been the moment when she passed out. She opened eyes to see the kind lady in charge of the retreat. Mia started to explain what happened. “Let’s get to that a later time, you need to rest now, my girl” – said the lady with the softest and kindest voice Mia had ever heard.

Mia thought, does this mean I get to skip that group discussion! Yay!

It almost felt like the lady read her thoughts. She said, “Oh don’t you worry about your group discussion, we moved you to the evening batch. You perfectly all right now and you can go back and continue to rest in your room.”

This was when Mia realised that she was in a different part of the retreat. Mia wasn’t sure whether she want to go back to the room. She really did not like the feeling she got there. Not she wasn’t sure if she could ask to move to another room. She thought she would do that the next day if things don’t feel better.

Mia was back in the room and she decided to rest for a while – she tried to feel calm and focus on feeling better. As she walked to get a glass of water, she felt like someone was right next to her. She could almost feel the breath of someone very close to her shoulders. She could also hear some weird sounds like someone was crying softly. She was very confused. And then again the smell of daffodils.

Mia loved daffodils, why was she smelling them everywhere And could not see them anywhere?

Mia decided to take it easy and get a nap before she could go back to attend the group discussion that she really did not want to. Surprisingly, she slipped into a deep, sound and refreshing sleep.

Mia woke up to a strong smell of coffee in the afternoon. She noticed that the staff had refilled her coffee. She wasn’t sure about having coffee in the afternoon but decided to make an exception. She wanted to be fresh for the group discussion and give it a real chance. How bad could it be?

Mia quickly showered, And wore her favourite white dress. She tried hard to remember why was this her favourite. It was super weird that she could not remember many details about herself. She kept thinking, “oh man! I hope people don’t think that I’m not sharing enough in the group discussion. I just can’t remember much…!”

She sprayed her favourite perfume and and set out for the group discussion. As she opened her door to go out, the smell of daffodils completely overpowered her.

She expected to see 8-10 people seated in a circle just as you would see in the movies. She never thought that she would ever be in this place. Instead, she was pleasantly surprised to see around 20-30 people engaged in easy conversations with each other. They seemed to share a camaraderie that she almost envied. She was embarrassed how easily she was getting envious of people in a “group discussion” that she did not even want to join a few moments ago.

Unlike groups that were difficult for a newcomer to break in, everyone made a genuine effort to include her. They had all posted stickers with their first names.

When Mia wanted to get a sticker for herself, she was told, everyone knows her. It was the same kind lady she met earlier (her sticker read Anna). She said, “Mia, so glad to have you here. We were not sure if you would make it, but we want to be here for you in any case.”

Mia did not get it. “Be here for me?” She thought, this was a group discussion where everyone would pour their heart – but she obviously got it wrong. She decided to keep her thoughts to herself.

That’s when she heard the champagne glass clinking. It was tall, good looking guy call Bryan. Bryan said, “As you all know, we are all here today for a special occasion.” Everyone started cheering and whistling. Mia tried to smile and cheer too – but she had no clue what the occasion was. Clearly, she did not read the memo.

Bryan continued, “Mia, we would gratefully like to celebrate your life. Let’s play the video.”

Mia was dumbfounded but also very curious – what this video could be about. It started with her childhood memories. She shook her inhibitions and pragmatism to figure out how they managed to put this together and started enjoying the video. Her first steps. The first time on a slide. Her parents doting on their single child. Her first-time bringing home her trophy from school. Her finish line memories from the triathlon. Her first boyfriend. Her interview at Harvard. Her first day at Harvard Law School. Passing the bar. Making it to one of the best law firms. Her prepping for her parents 25th anniversary.

“Oh my god! I remember now.” Mia thought, tearing up. “I ordered for thousands of daffodils for the ceremony. Dad proposed to Mom after reading the poem – Daffodils. So, I thought it would be funny. Why can’t I remember the party?”

That is when she realized that she was thinking aloud, and the video had stopped.

Everyone formed a weird circle around Mia and held each other close to each other. Anna said, “Mia, I am sorry, you could not attend your parents 25th anniversary. You checked all the arrangements at the party venue and took the train to get home for a quick nap before the party.

In the train, you saw a guy leaving his bag behind and rushing out. When you called out to him, he rushed out. You had the presence of mind to realize it could be a bomb. Without second thoughts, you picked the bag and rushed out of the station. You ran all the way to an empty field and threw the bag away as hard as you could. You saved 1000s of lives that day but unfortunately you lost a part of your memory. You needed a lot of therapy to have your brain be able to process all this.

The mirror was not a mirror. It was a program that monitored your motor functions. We are glad you are ok and can finally get back to your family. We are all the people in that train compartment. You saved us all. We wanted to be a part of your recovery.”

Mia was too shocked to hear all this and was crying inconsolably. She could only say, “what about my parents?” Almost as if that was their cue, her parents came in and gave her a big hug. They had missed her miserably too. They stayed in the same rehab centre and would regularly sneak in to check in on her when she was sleeping. The doctor had given them strict instructions to let Mia recover first – instead of giving her too many mental stimulations.

They were just excited and happy that their selfless daughter was alive and on a path to recovery. It was too much for Mia to process, but she was finally in peace too.

Mia and her parents agreed, the smell of daffodils was a catalyst for her recovery.

Her father couldn’t stop reciting his favourite part from the poem “Daffodils”

For oft, when on my couch I lie In vacant or in pensive mood, They flash upon that inward eye Which is the bliss of solitude; And then my heart with pleasure fills, And dances with the daffodils.

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#June 04 #2021 at 02:22PM

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