#their name is shag but i’m not gonna tag that for obvious reasons

[camraz]

various recent doodles of my sona (feat. @timelesslyjune’s sona Lolly)

[p4nkow]

Bijou

Hello everyone! Here’s a Roger one-shot which is nothing but fluffy fluff. It’s a friends-to-lovers kind of thing ‘cause I’m a sucker for it. It’s inspired by the song Bijou for obvious reasons.

Let me know what you think! My inbox and dms are always open!

Summary: Y/N is Roger’s best friend and roommate but after a gig everything changes. Basically that’s it. Oh, and it’s all thanks to Rudolf.

Warnings: none, I swear

Of course, it could be read both as Ben!Roger or as real life Roger. Also, gif not mine so credit to the owner!

You and me are destined

You'll agree

To spend the rest of our lives with each other

The rest of our days like two lovers

For ever - yeah - for ever

My bijou...

As far as you could remember, Marquee Club had never been as full as it was that night. It was probably due to the upcoming Queen gig, one of the first done under that name. Tim had dumped the boys for a band called Humpy Bong, of which Roger and Brian were very sceptic about, but right after they found Freddie and eventually John. Queen was born and their gigs were becoming more and more numerous. As Roger’s roommate and best friend it was your duty to attend each and everyone of them. You already knew Brian, he was one of your closest friends and his flat was right next to yours on Sinclair Road, but you had the chance to know Fred and John too. The five of you had become inseparable.

You made your way to the backstage with great difficulty, making your way through the numerous people.

“You‘re late!” Deaky put aside his bass to come and give you a hug. You pat his back as you hugged him back, murmuring against his shoulder “It’s bloody chaotic out there!”

“And bloody hot, too.”

“Ugh, you’re sweaty- get off.”

John chuckled as he leaned back, pointing out the point where the boys were. “Fred’s getting ready. We’re going onstage in ten.”

“Got it.” You nodded and you reached the boys, placing a kiss on Fred’s cheek and smiling at Brian. “Nervous, boys?”

“Always am.” Brian’s answer didn’t surprise you, you knew how much he tended to overthink and get nervous. Neither did Freddie’s. “I was born for this, darlin’.”

You knew he was just messing around but he really was born for this. Whenever he was onstage, he owned it. You’ve attended enough of their gigs to know that the audience had learned to love him, because he gave them what they needed. He always said that they were four misfits who played for other misfits and deep down he was right.

“I’m gonna be right at the front of the stage.”

“Will you take some pictures?”

You shrugged at Freddie’s question. “Sure, why not.”

“How many people are there?” Brian asked you with a shy smile, tightening his grip on his Red Special.

“The pub’s full. One can barely breathe out there.”

“Great” He murmured, reaching Deaky on the other side of the hallway.

Fred placed a kiss between your hair as he said “I’m gonna take my camera.”

“Wait, where’s Rog?”

“Out for a smoke.” You gave him a nod and you reached the back door, taking a deep breath before opening it.

You didn’t know why but you were always nervous around him. You had known him for years by know but over time you started to feel something more for him. Of course he wasn’t aware of your feelings and you weren’t planning on telling him the truth. You were okay with how things were developing and you were too afraid to lose him, so you stick with the best friend’s tag.

As soon as you opened the door you heard whispers coming from the dark, so you took a step forward in order to try to find him. “Rog?” No answer. More whispers and a chuckle. “Roger?”

And then you saw him. His hand was under some girl’s skirt and his lips were on her neck.

“Oh my god.” You covered your eyes with your hands as you moved back to go back inside. That’s when he noticed you.

“Y/N! Fuck, hey!” He quickly reached you, grabbing your wrist to make you turn towards him.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t supposed to see that. Freddie told me you were-”

“It’s okay, sorry ‘bout that.”

“Oh god” You murmured, covering your eyes again as you couldn’t stop thinking about what you just saw. Roger chuckled at the sight of you embarrassed and took both of your wrists, moving them away from your face in order to look at you in the eyes. “Don’t be shy, bijou.” You tried not to pay attention to the nickname he had given you. Bijou. He called you that since the very first time you had met.

“Yeah, it’s not like it’s the first time it happens.” As his roommate stuff like this happened more often than you liked to admit.

You couldn’t help but glance at the girl leaning against the wall, who waved at you and said “Wanna join?”

“God, no.” You glanced back at Roger and you cleared your throat, trying not act like he hurt you. He did, and it wasn’t even the first time. It was obvious that he was a handsome, talented and smart man and the fact that he was slowly becoming a rockstar worked in his favour. All girls fell at his feet- you did too, but somehow you were the only one who actually knew him. You knew - and loved - the real Roger, not the rockstar facade.

“I gotta go back inside, Fred needs help.”

He looked at his feet and nodded, giving a quick glance at the girl in the back. “Yeah, ‘kay.”

And without saying anything else you went looking for Freddie. As soon as you got back inside the pub, you leaned against a wall and took a deep breath. Tears were about to run down your face but you forced yourself not to cry. You had to act like if nothing happened, you had to be strong. You noticed John looking at you from the other side of the hallway so you gave him a little smile and he waved at you. Right before the start of the show Freddie handed you his camera and during the gig you took a few pics of all of them.

Despite everything you were having a lot of fun. You danced and sang along with Freddie, showing Brian your thumbs up as soon as he spotted you.

You met Roger’s gaze a few times, but you always looked away. You couldn’t stop thinking about what you saw out of the pub and you couldn’t stop thinking to the fact that you wished you were that girl.

And you couldn’t ignore the fact this the girls surrounding you were crazy about him. Who wouldn’t be? He was extremely hot while drumming. He was irresistible with his long, brownish hair. His shirt was obviously unbuttoned, exposing his bare chest covered in sweat and the plenty necklaces he was wearing. He knew the effect he had on girls and he liked to exploit it.

You tried really hard to ignore him and towards the end of the gig you went to grab something to drink, taking the opportunity to take a seat and give your legs some rest. You were looking at the pics you had taken while you waited for your drink when you heard a voice behind your back. “I guess you know the band.”

You had never seen that man but you couldn’t deny he was a handsome guy. His blonde hair reminded you of Roger. You gave him a nod before focusing again on the pics.

“I’m Rufus.” He said, and you shook his hand as you answered “Y/N.”

“Is someone of them your boyfriend?” He sat right next to you and looked at you with a big smile. You shook your head, giving a glance at the bartender and hoping it wouldn’t take long.

“Nope, they’re just friends of mine.”

“Glad to hear that.” You smiled at him as Freddie said goodbye to the crowd. You knew it took them at least half an hour to load the van so you were glad you had a little company in the meanwhile.

“And why’s that?” You said with a smile, thanking the bartender as she handed you your drink.

“Because it means that a beautiful girl like you isn’t dating anyone.”

“I could still have a boyfriend” You said with an amused smile. You glanced to the stage but it was empty and you couldn’t find the boys anywhere. They were probably taking a few minutes off before packing.

“Do you?” Rufus asked you and you were about to answer when you were interrupted.

“You ready to leave, love?” Roger stood right next to you, his hand placed on your back as he looked at you with a little smile. Rufus gave you a confused look and you could easily understand why. Roger was acting weird.

“Are we already leaving? I thought you had to pack.”

“Brian’s taking taking care of it.” He didn’t glance at Rufus, not even once. His attention was all on you.

“Oh, ‘kay then.” You gave him a nod before turning to Rufus. “It’s been a pleasure to meet you.”

He smiled at you and stood up, as to show that Roger wasn’t a threat to him. “Could I at least get your number?”

“Sure, let me-”

“We really have to go.” Roger cut you off and he basically dragged you away from Rufus.

“Roger, what the fuck?” You shrugged his hand off you and took a step back.

“What?” He looked at you with a raised eyebrow.

“You literally dragged me away!”

“I thought you might need some help with him.”

He wasn’t making any sense. “With Rufus?”

“You even know his name?”

“Shouldn’t I?”

You puffed and walked away. Roger followed you silently but as he stopped right next to you, you could feel he was mad. “I though he was bothering you.”

“He wasn’t.”

“Good.”

“Yeah.”

You reached the boys, who were already packing. Clearly Brian wasn’t taking care of it, considering the fact that they were struggling to pack Roger’s drums. You kept quiet for a while as you waited for the boys the get ready. Roger glanced at you a couple of times but you were too mad to look back at him. How dared he? He could have his casual dates and shags and you couldn’t even give your phone number to a boy?

The boys sensed that something was wrong between you and Roger, considering the fact that the two of you usually would be messing around till Brian had to drag you home.

“You okay?” John asked and you gave him a nod. You could feel Roger’s gaze on you and you tried not to look back at him.

“Yeah, don’t worry.”

“Did he do something?”

“He’s been just... Roger, y’know.”

John softly laughed at you before heading back to Fred. As soon as they finished packing, the five of you headed to the parking lot.

“You comin’ home with me?” Roger asked and you shook your head.

“Deaky’s giving me a ride.” You knew he was hurt, and so were you, but you had to spend some time away from him.

You ended up arriving at your flat before him, so you decided to kill time by taking a shower. When you got out of the bathroom he was sitting on your bed, his elbows on his knees as he waited for you.

“Is that my shirt?” Roger gave a quick glance at your tee with a smirk on his face but you could tell that there was still something wrong.

“Yeah, it smells good.” You stood right in front of him with your arms crossed as you tried to find the right words to bring back the previous subject.

But Roger beat you to it. “Do you want me to leave?”

“Why would I?”

“You’re mad at me.”

“Hell yeah I am, but I’d never kick you out.” You met his gaze and for a brief second you even forgot why you were mad at him.

“What happened tonight with that girl- I swear it won’t happen again.” You were surprised by his words.

“It’s already happened before.”

“Yeah, but it won’t happen again. I swear it, Bijou.”

You gave him a nod and stood silent. You gaze fell at your feet- you couldn’t stand to be this close without touching him.

“‘m sorry, didn’t want to ruin your night.”

“Rog.”

“No, Y/N, I mean it. If that Rudolf-”

“Rufus” You cut him off, amused by his behaviour.

“Rufus, yeah. If you like him that much-”

“Rog, I barely know him.”

You both stood quiet for a while but he didn’t look away from you. His gaze made you feel nervous and your heart was beating faster than ever. You didn’t even know with what courage you said the following words, but you did. “Are you jealous?”

“I’m what?”

“Jealous.”

“I’m not jealous.”

“‘kay.” You could not say you were surprised. You knew he didn’t feel for you what you felt for him, but hearing those words was like a stab in the stomach.

“If you’re not, at least don’t ruin my dates.”

“Y/N-”

“Shush, let me finish.” Now you were mad.“I’ve spent years watching you date random girls without saying a word and now that I’ve finally found a guy who’s actually interested in me you literally drag me away from him!”

“For Christ’s sake, you should have seen the way he looked at you!”

“What does it even mean?”

You were both screaming at each other by now. “It was the way I look at you!”

“Roger” You said, speechless.

He cupped your cheeks and placed his lips on yours in an angry kiss. You put both of your hands into his chest, holding into his shirt, fearing that if you let him go you’d fall on the floor. You didn’t trust your legs at all at the moment.

You couldn’t believe it was happening, the situation had improved really quickly. He moaned against your lips, putting a hand on your back in order to get you close to him. Your hands caressed his neck and your fingers slipped into his hair. You were surprised to find out that it felt more right than you thought.

When he leaned back his blue eyes met yours and you couldn’t help but smile at him.

“I shouldn’t be in love with you. I shouldn’t jeopardise our friendship. But fucking hell, in am. I’m bloody in love with you and I’m bloody jealous of that Rudolf.”

“Rufus” You corrected him again.

“Whatever.” He caressed your cheek with one hand and you closed your eyes at the shivers that his touch was giving you.

“I was afraid you’d never say that, because I love you too. I have for a long time by now.”

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

“Nope. I thought you were happy with your rockstar lifestyle.”

“It includes you.”

“Yeah, but as your roommate and best friend.”

“You know me better than anyone. I want you to be my best friend, my roommate but especially my girlfriend.”

You tapped his lips with your finger, fighting to push back a smile at his words. “I’ll think about it.”

His smile grew wider as he hold you close. “Y/N” He said as a warning.

“Just kidding.”

“You’d better.”

“Do you ever think we’re destined? Maybe we met for a reason, that day at Uni.”

“Yeah, that reason was Tim falling on you on the stairs.” You chuckled at the memory of the first time that you met him.

“I’m serious, Rog.”

“Dunno, Bijou. All I know is I wanna spend the rest of my days with you.”

[cupnoodle-queen]

CHASING SUNS: Chapter 2 Reset

1,478 words Tagging @blindbae and @nifwrites <3

Luck was empathetic that evening. 

Cam reached the blockade just outside of Lestallum, easing off the gas to brake for the approaching guard, a semi-automatic rifle cradled in his arms. She expected to be denied entry, that they were booked to capacity, but he asked her why she was here and it’d taken the last reserves of her composure to grit through clenched teeth that her fiance was just killed. That she had nowhere else to go. That she had no one else.

And so after several seconds of uncomfortable silence his shrewd eyes narrowed at her, a toothpick rolling between his teeth as he turned to another guard holding a checklist, made a quick scrawl and nodded for them to open the gate.

Cam parked the truck in the lot above the overlook, pressed her head to the steering wheel and broke into a million pieces. She cried harder than she had over the past couple of years, loud screams and sobs of anger and heartbreak clamping her ribcage against her lungs. Nolan was dead. She was homeless. Three hundred gil to her name crumpled up in her pocket, an old truck running on fumes, her cellphone and the clothes on her back.

She wept for an immeasurable amount of time, exhausting herself to the point her whimpers came out in cracks, her throat raw and sore. People outside had stared as they passed by, but fuck them. When the windows fogged, it was welcome seclusion.

At some point she fell asleep, leaning against the window and letting the tears flow freely against the glass as she drifted off. The nightmares showed no sympathy, barraging her mind with images of her family home buckling under the blow of the daemon’s weapon, the lights going out one after the other, and Nolan, trapped behind the rubble…

A tapping on the glass pulled her from the torment. She’d slept all night, or at least a full night’s sleep worth; it was hard to tell the days apart, for obvious reasons. Cam blinked and wiped the condensation from the window.

A familiar face peered in and she cranked the window down. “Greyson,” she croaked, voice sandpaper against her throat. “What are you doing here?”

The husky man noticed her golden eyes were rimmed-red, puffy and raw. “Could ask you the same thing.” Worry accented his words. “When did you get here? Where’s Nolan?”

Nolan…The wounds barely clotted and hearing his name ripped them open again. Without hesitation Cam’s eyes gathered tears. She couldn’t speak, so she shook her head, the corners of her lips quivering.

“Cam, what…” But then realization, as his face softened. “No, no fucking way…”

Greyson paced away with his head down, pinching the bridge of his nose. He circled back to the driver’s side window. “I’m so so sorry, Cam. When did-”

“Last night,” She replied through her teeth, anything to keep from breaking down again. “House’s gone. Iron giant.”

“Goddammit.” Greyson scratched his patchy beard and seemed to consider something. “What’re you gonna do?”

Cam stared out the windshield. “Stay here, I guess. They always need people at the power plant-”

“Come with me to HQ,” He suggested, cutting her off by accident. “We always need people, too.”

“To replace the ones that were killed, sure.”

Greyson seemed offended. “Not necessarily. We can use the help with vendors, or provisions or-”

“I’m staying here, Greyson.” It was Cam’s turn to cut him off. “I don’t have any desire to become a hunter. I know what life comes with that…profession,” she avoided Nolan’s face in her thoughts, “and it’s not for me. Thank you, but no.”

“Alright, alright,” He held his hands up, “whatever you say. Offer will stand should you take it. I just want to see you in good hands.”

They chatted for a little while longer before Greyson took off, a haul of supplies in the back of his pickup.

Cam spent the rest of her gil on a hotel room at the Leville and acquired a job at the power plant without needing an interview, as they were so desperate for people. Two days into it however, and she literally couldn’t take the heat. Even with the protective suits her skin boiled, the relief of a cold shower her reward at the end of the day. It paid by the day which was helpful, but it wouldn’t be enough for her to find a place to stay, afford rations and pay her phone bill. She’d have to do with out the latter eventually; not like she had anyone to keep in touch with.

After two weeks Cam’s income couldn’t keep up with the cost of renting a hotel room. She sold the truck, the profit just enough for one more night’s stay, and after an awkward conversation with a coworker she moved into their basement for the time being.

Jobs apart from the power plant were hard to come by, as any openings were filled the same day they were posted due to the massive population of the city. Crowds were not Cam’s thing and they were everywhere; restaurants packed to capacity and people forced to sit on the curb and eat their meals, lines at shops going around the block and barely any personal space when walking to and from work. It was overwhelming. Unnerving.

Suffocating.

There was a darkness of her own akin to that which plagued the land, seeping into her mind and spreading to further reaches as the days, then weeks, passed by. Color drained from her world, faces became flesh blobs in her field of vision, monotone voices with a distant pan no matter their proximity. It was a struggle each evening to keep Nolan from her thoughts, or at least think of better memories with him other than his final moments.

Cam leaned against the wall of the shower as she’d done every night after work, letting the ice water drench her and extinguish the fire her skin had endured in the heat suit. She wanted more than anything to stroll through the market square hand in hand with him, his blonde shag whipping around his face in the breeze and the innocence of youth in his silver eyes. But they’d converted the space into makeshift housing to try and deal with the influx of refugees so that was out of the question.

For some reason she reminisced back to a particular day at market, where she’d met four young men dressed in black clothing, including the one with the sun on his hip. Cam didn’t mention it to Nolan for obvious reasons; after all, how would one react to their significant other pointing out a stranger and announcing they were their soulmate?

That didn’t prevent her from thinking about him, though. Despite the years passing, the features of his face kept in crisp detail and whenever she thought of him pins and needles flared from the marking on her hip. Nolan’s face was already blurry…

No. It wasn’t fair to his memory to be thinking about a stranger like this, soulmate or not. She had to focus on restarting her life, getting her shit together. And after deliberating back and forth with herself, she concluded Lestallum was not the place for her.

She had to do as Nolan did. She needed to make a difference, and poaching herself in a heat suit on the daily was not the way to do it.

After tying her chestnut locks in a damp ponytail, she opened the contact page of her phone and dialed the only listing. After two rings, Greyson picked up. “Hey Cam, how’s Lestallum treating you?”

She sighed. “Not well. I was hoping that offer of yours was still on the table.”

“You mean you want to come work at HQ?”

A pause as she mulled over her decision a final time. The hunter lifestyle went against her grain; it required strength, cunning, fast reflexes and physical fitness, all things she lacked in varying degrees. To train and groom herself into a hunter would require a level of dedication she’d only previously applied to the family business, but the drive was there. Hidden beneath layers of encroaching depression and dysphoria, but it was there.

“Uhh Cam, you there?”

Greyson’s voice brought her back to the present. “Yeah,” she replied, “yeah, I want to go to HQ. Could you um, come pick me up anytime soon? I sold the truck.”

“Oh.” Greyson coughed. “Actually I can pick you up tonight. Is seven thirty okay?”

“Sure, I’ll pack my things.” Said things consisted of only a few changes of clothes, wallet and toothbrush. She’d be done in seconds. “I’ll meet you in the parkade.”

“Sounds good, later.”

As she ended the call, the sun marking on her hip tingled from beneath her skin, stronger than ever before.