#the wiki makes me want to rip my hair out

[phoenix--flying]

having an ANEURYSM trying to plot the age fucked pjo characters ages

[astrxealis]

me rn having the biggest hots for leon kennedy and astarion sorry LMFAOOO <3

[treedaddymcpuffpuff]

Beneath Miles of Stone XXIII

•John Wick x Plus Size Female Reader

• Howdy, I don’t know anything about guns or Russia besides the little research I’ve done. Please don’t be mad at me if I get facts wrong or say something dumb. Laughing at me, however, is completely acceptable :3. Also, I’ve been going down a rabbit hole of high table & John Wick lore for this story, and there’s lots of references to other JW media (the comics, the Continental TV series, wiki pages).

• Thank you so much everyone who is reading/commenting on/liking this story, it means a lot to me and I love you guys. I started writing this one year ago and feel like I’ve improved so, so much that it’s insane. I’ve been learning to pick out my own style and make it coherent by reading all the other brilliant fanfictions from everyone on Wickblr/Keanublr and I’m insanely grateful I found this little hole of internet. Divider is by @thecutestgrotto

• TW: blood, death, bodies, HEAVY NSFW, gore, guns.

She does, eagerly, jumps under the covers, and he tsks, pulling off his sweater with one hand. “No, honey. Spread your body out for me. I want to see you.”

She almost starts to protest, but the dark look he gives closes her mouth, and she lays flat, naked, looking anywhere but at him, pushing the blanket off on the floor to avoid its tempting sanctuary.

He chuckles. “Spread your legs, babydoll. Wider. There you go.”

She whines, fisting the bed sheets and closing her eyes tight while her pussy pulses uselessly, sure he can see the slick glittering on her lips and unkept hair.

“Look at me,” he tells her, and by god she tries despite the fact that his cock can’t get much harder without fucking exploding into pieces. He undoes his belt, then slips his jeans down, and the outline of his leaking length makes her mouth water.

God, he’s beautiful. She’ll never get used to it.

He says aloud what she thinks. “You’re beautiful. I could stare at you all night.”

She laughs. “Please don’t.”

“Why not?”

“I want you.”

“I can’t stare at you while you have me?”

“Just come here.”

“Or what?”

“I’ll cry.”

His palms catch the end of the mattress, and he kneels down by the edge. The pride he feels in light of this titillating manipulation, as if he single handedly taught her how to sin himself, should be worrying. Corruption looks so pretty while she wears it and nothing else.

He grabs for her ankle, and catches it despite screeches and giggles and protests and pulling.

The phone at their bedside rings, and his teasing teeth stop just short of her neck.

“Did you just break that?” Her fingers twirl into his beard.

He leans into her touch while they both steal an incredulous look at the landline he just ripped from the wall and threw across the room.

It’s not ringing anymore, that’s what really matters. He goes back in for flesh—will kill, with his bare hands, whoever makes his cordless sound off over her needy whimpers.

She looks up at him for a long moment, trying not to laugh or cry, and then says: “can I break that one?”

He has to go.

“Why do you wear a suit?” She asks him, fumbling with the tie.

He guides her fingers, showing her how to cinch it. “Professionalism’s sake.”

“Oh,” she smiles, tracing the indent of his cock with her thumb. “This is professional?”

They’re on the bed again, pressed in tight, tongues rolling together. He pulls away and she wipes saliva off his beard, tugs him back by the tie he just so neatly put together.

“I have to go,” he says, grinding against her, slicking up the crotch of his pants.

“Yeah,” she agrees, digging her fingers into the dip of his beautifully sloped back.

“In the Morning,” he promises, pressing her mouth against his clothed erection with palm threaded through her hair.

“Can’t have you going to work messy,” she says, eating her own cum off of his dress pants.

“You-ah, ah-John. You have to go.” As he teases open mouthed kisses up the seam of her puffy pussy, whispers praises over the den of her clit.

“Gotta go,” he grunts, lifting his hips up so she can wrestle his cock free from its confines and suckle the leaking cum from his tip.

“Can’t let you stain your nice professional pants.” She cleans him so nicely with her tongue that it creates even more of a mess.

She cleans that up, too.

“Please—please don’t stop,” she asks, arching her back, words jumbled and urgent, willing with a deep whine for the increased tempo of his tongue and fingers.

All these delicious plans he has for dominating her benevolence with the elusivity of release, reducing her to begging and bargaining and selfish demands, immediately crumble under the beautiful, breathy way she asks for an orgasm, and he growls at himself and her gushing, clenching pussy for giving in so easily. Still, he eats up her mess and brings her down nice, easy, soft, crawling up her trembling body until he can make her taste herself on his mouth, which she does eagerly and delightedly.

“Don’t go,” she says, post coital bliss somehow softening her up even more. She’s melting into the mattress and pulling him down with her, like sticky boiling sugar enveloping a curious fly.

“I have to go,” he says, clinging to her, still full on suited and with his aching cock tucked back in.

She huffs, reaches for him, to wrap those plump little fingers around where he is crying, twitching, furious.

“Just one more taste,” she asks, rubbing languidly at his pronounced head.

He is cold, calculated, unbreakable, steadfast. He has endured hours of torture and pain and blood and agony. He is an impenetrable force, the enigmatic feared entity of the Bratva, and he bucks and shivers and—

whines, pressing the sound into her throat as she smiles with pride and adoration and idly twirls his hair around her fingers.

If he were a weaker man, or maybe a stronger one, he wouldn’t unstick himself, kiss her cheek, smooth down her wild hair before pressing his face into the thick of it and memorizing the smell.

“Come back to me,” she orders, as he puts on his other shoe.

“Don’t die, okay?” She pleads, as he’s tucking guns and knives into his clothes.

He places one last kiss to the middle of her forehead, unsure of promises, unsure if he can fulfill her request. The only sure thing in his life is the tangible heat and want between them that is burning him alive. He says, after a few seconds pressed against her damp skin, “okay.”

——————-

Winston must have looked through her own closet somehow, because comfy cotton T-shirts and leggings and sweatpants are the majority of what he sent for her. She can’t stop being eternally grateful for his hospitality, despite the resistance she’s put up against it.

She takes a long, hellfire shower, winces when she gets to her pubic bone—her hips are sore, bruised, labia red and raw from beard burn. Inner thighs chafed to hell. It hurts, but she wants to keep all of it as a reminder of her John.

The Continental comes to life at night. The lights dim blue and deep red, music pumps behind colossal forbidden doorways, patrons of all ethnicities and ages and cultures accumulate at tables and cluster on lounging couches.

Bookstore library stranger greets her in the silver-coated dining room. She has a bit of alcohol on her breath and blouse. Despite this, she’s very happy to see her again.

“Hello Ella.”

“Would you like a drink? My treat. They have everything. Straight, narrow, sugar.” Ella puts her hand over her mouth and hiccups. “Excuse me. Get anything you like, dear.”

She orders simple, A fruity cocktail, and sits with Ella for a bit while hearing stories about growing up wealthy and admired. It’s so differently fascinating from her own life, these tales—she’s utterly captivated and brimming with jealousy.

Addie is here, too, graced by inhuman strength in her lithe frame, when she pulls her away from story time to speak privately.

“Do you know who that is?” Addie asks, holding two fingers up at the bar tender.

He delivers two crystal glasses of sparkling water. “She’s my friend, I met her at a bookstore. Her name is Ella.”

“Elena Jovonovick,” Addie corrects with a concerned frown and drawn eyes. “She is the head of the Ruska Roma.”

She blinks at Addie a few times, understanding curtaining over her face. “Oh…”

Addie opens her mouth, but the voice that speaks does not belong to her. Ella—Elena—sidles between them, and motions for another drink. “Addie, sweet girl, what is wrong?”

Addie’s flushed cheeks bleed all their color, but she does not tremble nor fall back despite the look of abject fear held in her face for this tiny woman.

She doesn’t understand the fear, but does understand that the woman she has become friends with is…what? John’s adoptive mother? A slew of emotions typhoon through her. The first, humor. It’s funny, that she she’s meeting his family without his knowledge. Second, anger. Anger because this is the person who took tiny, defenseless, innocent John—her John—and turned him into a harbinger of death.

She starts to say something seething, something that she will regret later, but when she looks at Ella and opens her mouth, she sees a familiar expression—sorrow, regret, profound sadness. Like an abandoned, filthy dog on the street corner. And her jaw snaps back into place.

“Please,” Ella says, sipping at her drink. “I need John Wick’s help.”

—————————————

The doctor was right, he is distracted and sloppy. A mind at war. A hit that glances off someone’s sternum, not killing them. A failed attempt at kicking one of his colleagues away from a butterfly in the femoral.

He grabs some flyaway blood, throws it in the knife wielder’s face, then presses a bullet into his skull.

He tugs a foam plug from his ear to hear what Marcus is yelling from across the room. It’s done, anyway. Twenty two men in, twenty two men out. He wipes sweat off his brow and leans against the cool wall to bring himself back to baseline.

“Did you hear me, John?”

“Yeah, I heard you.”

But he didn’t, and still doesn’t, occupied by the message on his phone that blackens his vision around the edges—whether in fear or rage, he cannot tell.

Rage is simple, clean and cut, as slick as the jacketed bullet he sunk into the skull of Yuri Morozov when one of his bodyguards flexed their finger on a trigger.

“The car’s loaded with dynamite,” Marcus says, swiping some sulphur off his cheekbone, panting from the jog over. “What—what’s wrong?”

It’s an unusual conversation to have while splattered with blood and surrounded by the bodies spilling it. Marcus continues despite the situation.

“Jesus Christ, tell me why you look like that.”

John blinks at him, almost asks him to explain what expression he sees and this concerned reaction to it. He already knows, though, doesn’t he? That his face has become a breeding ground for pesky emotions. “Elena Jovonovick is staying at the New York Continental.”

“Who—“ Marcus guffaws in disbelief. “Who told you that?”

“Does it matter?”

“No—what the fuck. Where are you going?”

“Back home.”

“You can’t kill her John! You can’t kill the head of the fucking Ruska Roma! You know that?” Marcus takes a few leaps after him, but ultimately decides against intervention.

“Where is he going?” Kirill asks over the earpiece when he first hears the snarling squeal, then sees John’s mustang peel onto the boulevard.

“Diarrhea,” Marcus replies.

[yourlocaldouma]

I kinda was just motivated. It's really my first time using this app so please be patient with me. I just wanted to see innocent zero with a contrast of his color palette with wavy hair.

Innocent Zero fell for you little by little, him not really noticing it and excusing his behavior by thinking 'im only doing this so you cannot cause more trouble'

He'd be wrapping an arm around your waist keeping you close whenever there was a ball that he had planned and invited all the underground crime lords to have a private 'chats' with each other (making more business deals and plans of smuggling rare band things and whatnots)

He calls you pet names, such as dear, darling, sweet heart (whenever his mad).

He'll randomly kiss you from time to time, not really explaining why. (He likes the flustered look on your face, to be the one to only ellicite that type of reaction from you sends a thrill to his veins)

He buys you various items that connects to your hobbies, saying something along the lines of "here, don't bother me"

You sometimes do gardening on the indoor garden, and he watches you without you knowing.

You were quite devastated when you found out that he infested it with magic-sucking bugs and made it a death trap for any intruder that had entered the castle. But in return, he gave you a few potted plants for you to take care of, saying, "I don't like that moppy look on your face." He doesn't even know why he did that, he literally shoved it into your arms carelessly.

Don't be concerned when you wake up from your slumber, finding yourself seated on his lap, with him twirling a strand of your hair with a blank look on his face. He was contemplating whether he should kill you or not.. but he would quickly make up a reason as to why not. His children were fond of you, their mother. And killing you would just end up sloppily doing their missions because of their 'pathetic' grieving. (His words not mine)

Just go back to sleep and don't question him about it, you'll be getting a glare and a slap to your mouth if you ever mention it in the morning. Though he heals the tiny bruise afterwards.

He had starved your children when they were younger as a punishment. (HAVE YOU SEEN THEIR WEIGHT ON WIKI!?)

He had remembered you crying after Epidem was in an infirmary bed, clutching his tiny hands between yours. He may had gotten too far on Epidem.

Fun fact: Epidem liked pudding because it was the first flavorful and sweetest thing he had ever eaten after you had introduced it. But he limits himself because he didn't want to see you sad and get beaten by his father. This was when he was still a child.

He was standing in the doorway, looking at the scene, your back was facing him.

He didn't like the tiny sobs that escaped from your lips, he could feel an unknown migraine that formed everytime you let out small cries, or the way his heart was painfully getting squeezed. He marched towards you ripping your hold on the boys hands and gripped your shoulder, "Stop crying." He commands, voice threatening.

After that he had dragged you away and locked you in your shared bedroom.

Cyril Marcus is an asshole, an asshole that you unfortunately married.

[echantedtoon]

Love Is Blind Ch3 Not What It Seems

(WARNINGS: Mentioning of death, Mentioning of someone taking their own life, Kagaya being sick and having scars, and mentioning of him being burnt in a fire.

pic of Y/n above was edited by me. IMPORTANT THO!! This is NOT what Y/n looks like except for the white hair. I just wanted to make one of these picture edits for fun. Art not mine, found on Pinterest, credit to original artist, etc. The wisteria gate pic isn't mine either and was found on Google. If you need visuals on the wysteria gate and the garden they look exactly like the links below only that Kagaya's garden has WAY more flowers than cannon.

Wysteria gate

Kagaya's garden

https://www.ign.com/wikis/demon-slayer-the-hinokami-chronicles/Chapter_3_-_Death_Match_in_Asakusa )

CLIP. CLOP. CLIP. CLOP. CLIP. CLOP.

The sounds of a beautiful black stallion's hooves walked across the old dirt paths leading down the land and through the forests. Of course having walked along this road so many times, the mighty horse was already familiar with roads. A snort escaped from his snout before he shook his mane out from an itch.

"Easy boy. Just ignore the beast and keep going."

The driver of a sturdy cart ordered the horse giving a firm and hard slap of the reigns making the stallion snort once again but got it to ignore the fox that scurried across the road in front of it. The sly red canine stopped in the treeline and looked at them before turning away to quickly scurry into the forest.

"Pretty thing. If I brought my crossbow I could've gotten a good pelt for a muff."

"Let's leave it alone, Papa." A head of white hair shined in the sunlight as f/c eyes looked at where the pretty fox disappeared. "Something as beautiful as that deserves to live free."

The older man smiled at his daughter's beauty and kindness. "I agree. That's why we're going there. You deserve to have such freedom without someone trying to stubbornly take that away from you."

You turned to him smiling widely and sweetly at him. "I'm sure everything will be fine, Papa. It's just a small visit to clear up a misunderstanding. That's all."

Your father hummed again before whipping the reigns to make the stallion trot faster. "Your mother nearly ripped me a new one when we suggested this idea. I'm still surprised that I managed to convince her to let you come-"

"I heard that!" Your mother glared at him as he chuckled before crossing her arms. "I only agreed to it on the basis that we all go with her! There's absolutely no way I'm allowing my daughter to visit these strangers all by herself! Plus I'd like to give these Ubuyashikis a piece of my mind!"

"Now, Dear." Your father gave your mother a rare stern look. "Remember what we talked about. We're going to be polite AND civil about this. If there is a reason for stern talking then I'll let you know but unless that happens I WILL do the negotiations."

His wife huffed before crossing her arms with a pout. "Fine! But we're leaving at the first sign of trouble!"

You only shook your head from the back of the cart before leaning back against the wooded side and looked out as you all passed a beautiful field of flowers. It had been nearly two weeks of this kind of travel and during the entire time it had been beautiful and peaceful aside from your mother's occasional angry spouts but otherwise pleasant. In truth getting her to agree to your idea hadn't been easy as he DEMANDED you not go anywhere near the Ubuyashiki estate but in a rare stern tone your father had put his foot town.

"Our daughter is going to be twenty next year! She won't be a teenager anymore besides she's already a grown woman. Not a child. If she decides to go see this family then we can't stop her. I'm going with her anyways so there won't be any danger. There will be no more arguments."

Your mother had no choice but to agree but insisted on coming. Not wanting another argument your father agreed but only on the conditions that she wouldn't have any arguments when there. With all these things settled, your mother had gotten your older cousin to house sit while your entire family was gone and your father had talked his boss into giving him this extra route again as an excuse to make this detour. Now here you three were traveling through places you've never been before. This was both exciting and nerve-racking to say the least. The sun was high in the sky as the beautiful trees waved in the wind and the scent of wild flowers filled the cooking breeze. It made you smile and stretch your arms out. Even if you don't marry, the beautiful sights was making this trip all the worthwhile. Your father mentioned that the pathway to the estate was closer now and you should be there by tomorrow hopefully. 

The sun slowly went across the beautiful skies. Your eyes watching safely from the back of the cart until they felt heavy, and closed against their will before the moon could bless them with her presence.

 Purple

The overarching flowers outstretched their petals looming overhead as arms getting ready to embrace the people below in their soft petals falling down from above as shining gifts from the heavenly tops of the trees. It was a blessed sight to wake up to once F/c orbs awoken hearing a gasp of another woman wake up and then a voice speak.

"It's so beautiful. I feel like we're approaching heaven."

It was like heaven. Staring up at nothing but beautiful wisteria blooms hanging down from the air as leaves blocked out most of the rest of the light but still patches of that beautiful sun flowed down in small splotches peeling through the trees and their heavenly flowers like shy mice. The aroma of the flowers filling this forest right out of a fairytale and the small animals running amongst the flora only added to that heavenly fairytale image. You spotted a mother deer and her two young fawns chewing on the delicate buds of the new spring grass. The beautiful mother looked briefly at the cart passing by before turning away to put attention on her children. A flurry of sparrows passed by the trees and f/c eyes smiled up following them.

"This is absolutely beautiful. It's like something out of a dream."

"This is part of the Ubuyashiki territory." Your father gestured all around the woods smiling. "All of this? They own every tree in it. In fact they own a huge chunk of this mountain. I heard it's been in the family for the past ninety five generations."

"That certainly is...a lot of territory to own." Your mother hummed with a deep thoughtful expression on her face.

"A lot of territory? Honey, these people own the entire town just on the other side of the estate! I go past it just to get to the city. If you don't know better, you'd mistake the big town for the city."

"Oh really?... That's a lot of revenue."

The cart still pulled past the forest down an old path as you looked around in awe. Everything looked so beautiful and birds were singing in the spring air. So heavenly. Unbeknownst to you and your mother, your father had continued traveling through the night turning his horse onto an almost hidden path leading deep into mountain forest and when you both had awakened, you had woken up to the most beautiful sight you'd ever seen.

"We're not too far away now. We didn't give them any notice we'd be coming so they'll certainly be surprised."

"Hmph. We're making the effort to come all the way out here so the least they can do is be grateful that we actually came here to answer them!"

Your father didn't comment on your mother's tone but did also the reigns making the horse pick up his pace trotting down the old pathway. Deeper and deeper and deeper into the forest you all went. The more wysteria trees clustered around until they seemed to be the only trees in the forest. Down the pathway farther and farther until they reached a small semi clearing at the end of the pathway. The driver had the horse turn around in the clearing and started back up the path you came before pulling it back to a full stop next to a small tree with the horse facing back the way you came. Without uttering a word your father got up and jumped from the wagon, taking a minute to tie the reigns around one of the trees branches to keep the stallion from wondering off before giving the horse a few pats. 

"We're here," he said turning back to you before looking past you making you blink and turn to see what he was looking at.

Another pathway lead from the original path leading away from you and towards the right side of the original path. But instead of dirt, this one was made of cobblestone and cut brick. A flight of stairs lead from the path up the hill and stopped to continue on in a normal pathway again starting under a giant wooden archway. Wysteria petals decorated the old stairs like some makeshift nature carpet and more scattered with the wind. You stared at it before a thud made you turn your head just as your father set your mother down from helping her out of the cart. You slowly stood up as he also reached out to you 

"Maybe you two should stay with the cart and let me handle this." He gently grabbed your sides before heaving you up and out of the cart before placing you down on the ground. "I'm sure I can handle it from here."

"No. I came all the way here to see him and if I don't show up they'll just send me another letter wanting to hear from me. We might as well go and clear everything up now." Your nodded firmly nodded in agreement.

Your father sighed before reaching in the back of the wagon and pulling out a small box the size of three regular books across and five inches high. He tucked it under one arm before turning towards the stairs. "Alright then. Let's go settle this. Just both of you stay close to me. And remember..." He gave your mother a firm look. "I WILL do the talking."

Your footsteps echoed throughout the peaceful forest as the three of you climbed up the stairs towards the wooden archway above. Your father carrying the box under his arm and your mother holding onto his other arm looking around while you followed right after them. You stared up in awe as you all climbed up higher and higher until you all passed under the arch. Your head followed it by as you all passed it on the way through before looking ahead and following your parents down the old cobblestone path. The wysteria trees on both sides were stretched out as far as the eye could see. Beautiful purple flowers everywhere swaying in the breeze and the pleasant fragrance wafting in the air. Your mother was also in awe staring around her.

"This is incredible."

Your father chuckled. "Wait until you see the mansion. Mr. Ubuyashiki is actually very pleasant."

Your mother turned to her husband. "You've already met our daughter's supposed soulmate?"

"No but I met his father. He was rather old. In fact he was old enough to be my grandfather."

"If he's that old then how old is his son?! If he's some pervert-"

"Dear, we are not going to talk bad about someone when we haven't even met him yet-"

SHING-

You squealed out as all of a sudden there was a metallic sound, a flash of shining silver, and then the cold steel of a sword was right in front of your father's face. Your mother shrieked clinging closer to her husband on instinct. The three of you froze as a cold blade was held out to your father's next. Your previous shrieks scaring birds away from you.

"Who the fuck are you people?!" 

You timidly peeked around your father's shoulder and looked past him only to pause seeing the man on the other side. It was a man around your age with short untamed white hair but what struck fear into you was the dark small pupils in his feral eyes and the fact that his body was littered in scars. When none of you answered he snarled and pushed the blade closer to the man's neck. 

"Are you all deaf?! Answer me!"

"Sanemi, that is not a nice way to treat people!" A much louder voice boomed out from behind you making you squeak again and whirl around to yet another man's torso with his arms crossed. You looked up at his face and paused seeing a head of flaming red hair and just as vibrant fire like eyes. You were stunned at...how absolutely handsome this stranger was as he tilted his head at you. "Especially woman. Now why don't you lower your blade?"

The white haired man narrowed his eyes staring at the frozen middle aged man in front of him. Before glancing at your frightened mother and your frozen form behind her. "...Tch." The large blade was lowered from your father's neck but not put away as the angry scarred man stared them down. "That still doesn't excuse them from trespassing here!"

"INDEED!!" The man with flaming hair agreed loudly causing you to wince at the loud volume. "As much as I don't like my friends violent methods, I agree that you shouldn't be trespassing here! I will have to kindly ask you all to leave!"

"We're supposed to be here." Your father somehow stayed calm throughout this entire thing to his credit. The box shuffled under his arm. "I'm delivering this."

Again the white haired man looked suspicious glancing between him and the box. "Yeah? And what's in it?"

"Herbs and medicine."

"AH!! Then this must be the delivery Oyakata-sama was expecting! EXCELLENT!!" You again winced at the red head's loud voice booming out.

"Oh really? Why is there three of you then? It doesn't take three people to delivery one puny package! Gimme that dam box!"

Your father made no move to stop the man from yanking the box away from his arm. No one made a move as he placed his blade under his arm and harshly tore off the lip to poke his head inside..... before he slowly placed the lid back on the box wordlessly.

"What was in the box?"

Mr. White hair ignored his college before shoving the box back into your father's arms. "Why are three of you delivering herbs instead of just one of you?" Despite his embarrassment he still demanded answers to his questions but lost that angry edge to his tone. 

"The master of this estate asked us to come here." Your father calmly said. "I thought it'd be best to see what he wants."

And again that suspicious look was back. "Why would Oyakata-sama ask to see you lot?"

"It wasn't this Oyakata-sama whomever he is. We were invited by Kotoya Ubuyashiki."

"AH!! THE MASTER'S FATHER!!" Mr. Red Head nodded in understanding. "That clears up things then! He probably has invited them here! For what purpose I am unsure however but we should take them to him!"

Mr. White Hair looked at you all before FINALLY slowly putting his blade away. "What would he want with two women and a delivery man?"

"LET'S FIND OUT!!" You jumped as Mr. Red Head quickly pointed his arm down the path again. "Please follow us! I'll show you the way there!" He looked back to your still staring face. "Miss??"

You still stared for about six more seconds until your brain finally registered he was asking for your name. "AH! I-I'm Y/n!" You gave a small bow in greeting before pausing...and slowly looked back up to him. He was rather handsome and..not bad looking. You leaned back up. Could it be-? "Are you.. Kagaya Ubuyashiki?" 

The man paused, blinked, before throwing his head back and giving a few hearty laughs that had you blushing. 

"PFFT!! HIM?! HA! That's a good one!" Behind you his college also began to laugh making you feel more embarrassed.

His locks swayed as he shook his head eventually his loud laughs devolving into amused chuckles. "I'm flattered you would give me the honor of mistaking me for that title, but I'm afraid you're just that. Mistaken. I am Kyojuro Rengoku, a guard for my Master's estate."

You blinked at him before turning to the now smugly amused white haired man who now had his arms crossed. Now looking at him...He was also quite handsome. Albeit in a more warrior rugged type of way but still fairly handsome. As if sensing your question he just shook his head.

"You're looking at the wrong person."

"This is SANEMI!! Don't let his scary attitude fool you! He's actually a very nice person! If you're here to see the Master's family then follow us. His home is just up ahead."

You were kinda disappointed this handsome man wasn't who you were looking for but at least you were in the right place. It was kinda awkward because Sanemi just turned and started walking away from you all with your parents following and you and Mr. Kyojuro following up behind them both. There was about an hour of silent, awkward walking as you turned your attention to the wysteria trees.

"My apologies for startling you all!" You again jumped and whirled around to Rengoku who smiled warmly. "But when we saw many people in a strange wagon we had to see what your intentions were!"

You didn't even see them coming in? Where did they even come from? Instead you shook your head. "I-Its alright. I would've been suspicious too if a bunch of strangers showed up to my house." You tried giving him a smile. "So..You work for the Ubuyashikis?"

He nodded. "Yes! For a few years now! I guard the estate for my Master!"

"You mean Mr. Kagaya?"

"INDEED!"

That peeked your interest a bit. Perhaps you can get some insight on this mysterious man. "Oh, I see. What's his family like?"

"Oyakata-sama's father is a very good man! I've known him for many years!"

"Oh that's so nice. And...what is Mr. Kagaya like?"

"The Master is the most honorable man that's ever lived!" His smile got even wider. "He's very compassionate and wise beyond his years. You'll never find another man like him even if you tried."

Your eyes widened with each word he spoke. Honorable? Compassionate? Wise? Those were traits that you used to spend countless hours everyday wishing your soulmate had until you decided to focus on yourself and your work. Could it really be everything you needed? Could the gods have sent you the perfect person?

"Is he as handsome as you?"

That caught him off guard as he blinked again before again giving a few loud hearty laughs. But it was a legitimate question from you. You wanted to know what he looked like. What he did. Who he was. What made up Kagaya Ubuyashiki.

"My dear lady, you flatter me!" He gave a few more chuckles but nodded. "But I would say that the Master is rather handsome in his own way!"

"How old is he?", your mother suddenly asked tossing him a suspicious look at Rengoku.

"Mother!"

Kyojuro held up a hand. "It's alright. I actually don't know his specific age. Never asked! But I do know he's actually around my age!"

Oh. So that meant he was actually around your age too! That answer actually seemed to satisfy your mother and she huffed turning back around. At least it did not start an argument.

"You all seem very interested in the Master!"

"We're here to visit his family so it's understandable to ask about someone I'll be meeting." You thought about something for a moment before looking back to him. "You mentioned before that he's the Master of this estate. What does he do for work?" 

"The Ubuyashiki's have ran this land for generations! The whole town on the other side of the estate is essentially owned by them! But specifically Oyakaya-sama funds a rather large and successful school! I am also a teacher there when Im not asked to fill in for the usual guards here!"

"A school?" You had a small school back home you attended before studying under the local herbalist but you were surprised to hear a school being very successful.

He nodded. "He wants every child to have an education! My brother attends with his friends! I'm happy to give him a head start in life!"

"Wow. That's a lot of responsibility for him to take on."

"He's a very honorable and responsible man as I've stated before!"

Responsible. That's also what you wanted. Could this really be the one?

You all continued to walk to walk through this wysteria woods. Eventually you all walked over a cobblestone bridge leading over a small stream and continued to walk until you turned a corner blocked by a tree, and nearly ran into your mother as you looked up and let your jaw drop at what you saw.

THE BIGGEST MANSION YOU HAD EVER SEEN WAS SITTING RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU ALL!!

It had to be the largest building you'd ever seen in both space and height! The old but nicely maintained building loomed over head covered in many purple petals from the surrounding wysteria trees. In the very front of the house was a very beautiful small clearing edged with small cut shrubs and the cobblestone path continued up to stop at the front steps of the manor. Eventually you all snapped out of your stupor to continue up the path and to the stairs. The first man, Sanemi, was the first one to reach the door before opening it and looking at you all. 

"I'm gonna let them know these people are here. Stay with them and make sure they don't try anything!"

"DON'T WORRY!! I'll be fine!"

Sanemi rolled his eyes but left you all awkwardly standing in the doorway and hallway. You watched him walk down the long very clean corridor before he disappeared around the corner and then looked around the tiny hallway as Rengoku just...stood there keeping an eye on you all. Eventually your mother poked your father's side.

"Where does this lead?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I only came this far before delivering the previous order and leaving. I never saw the rest of this place."

That was helpful. You sighed and decided to look around the hall more to occupy time. The wooden floor was polished and well kept. Two paintings hung on the walls. One was a boat on the ocean and the other was too far away from you to see but you thought maybe it was a vase of roses?? A small table sat randomly near the corner where Sanemi disappeared and on top of it was a random decorative vase. And then there was the old man coming towards you-

....You blinked.

A little old man about your mother's height and grandmother's age came shuffling quickly down the hallway and smiled at you all. Behind him Sanemi boredly walked behind him with his hands behind his head. 

"At last!" He said in a happy but slightly raspy way. "At last! At last! AT LAST YOU'RE HERE!!"

His arms extended out towards you all as if to embrace you three. It wasn't until he was past the closest painting to you that you realized that..It was directed AT YOU. He was smoking AT YOU. He was holding his arms out TO YOU. And he was coming straight TO YOU!! You had barely registered this fact before suddenly arms were being thrown around you making you freeze as arms pulled you in for a tight hug. Your mother bristled and immediately looked ready to physically yank this stranger off of you.

"I was waiting for you for so long!" He pulled away from you to smile softly and it was only now that you realized that..his little old man was crying. Fat tears rollef down his crinkled face as he smiled widely, happily, softly. "Y-Y-You have no idea about how long we've been waiting for you! To find you finally before the unthinkable happens!" Huh? What did he mean by that? You blinked as his hands cupped your face. "And look at how beautiful you are! Such hair.. It's a rare color I've only seen one other person have!"

You supposed he was referring to Sanemi but- "I'm sorry but..Who are you?"

"Yes. WHO are you?," your mother narrowed her eyes with a frown at him. 

"Oh. Yes, yes. We haven't met yet." He quickly rubbed at his face but never lost his excited smile. "I am Kotoya Ubuyashiki." He gave as quick a bow as his old body could give before looking at you again. "I'm so glad you've finally decided to come! We've been waiting for so long!"

"*AHEM!*" Your father cleared his throat loudly gaining your the older man's attention to him. "Perhaps we're starting off on the wrong person. I'm Y/n's father."

"Oh yes! Mr. L/n, I remember you!," he happily greeted turning to your parents with a big smile, "You look well! And this must be your wife!" He smiled at your deadpanned mother. "I apologize for all the trouble I caused but I'm so happy you're all here! I've been trying to find my grandson's soulmate for so long. I feared he'd forever be alone once I passed away."

"Grandson?," your mother instantly looked suspicious at him. "I was told he was your son!"

He nodded. "He's that too. Won't you please come in?" He gestured down the hall towards the rest of the house. "Everything can be explained and we can discuss things."

"That is fine." Your father nodded. "But we can't stay long. My horse is down the hill-"

"Of course, of course. Rengoku please go bring the man's horse some food and water while we conduct business. Cone, come. I'm sure we have much to discuss."

You weren't too sure about this but your father wordlessly followed the smiling man and you reluctantly followed your parents leaving the first two men behind. Mr. Kotoya continued happily chatting despite your father's silence and your mother's scowling. Eventually turning a corner and pointing at random objects or rooms explaining what they were or where they came from until eventually he stopped in front of one room and smiled turning at you specifically.

"This is the indoor garden."

"Indoor garden?"

Kotoya nodded. "We grow plants inside when my grandson is unable to go outside or can't move around too much." Confusion graced your face again. Unable to go outside and move around? Did he mean when it was winter or raining really badly?? "The Library and study is just down the hall across from the dining room."

"That's...very nice but we should get back onto the topic we came back to discuss." Your father firmly looked at him and rose a brow. "We came here to discuss my daughter's involvement in all this and if you don't mind, I'd rather get this over with as soon as possible."

Kotoya eagerly nodded. "But of course. I think the sooner the wedding is the better. It'll take a little bit to throw things together but if you want it to be fast, I can have it all together in as little as a week!"

"I'm not here to discuss any weddings." Your father placed a free hand on his hip. "Ever since last October you've been harassing my family especially my daughter to marry someone she hasn't even met once, you've drove my wife insane, and you haven't taken a hint to our obvious nos!" Mr. Kotoya blinked loosing his smile as your father stood firm and your mother looked proud at her husband. "Now, Sir. I don't take too kindly to people who try and harass my little girl like this. I'm not going to agree with anything especially forcing her to marry someone. Now you better tell me why you're bothering my daughter with this or we're leaving this instant."

There was silence as both men continued to stare down one another bit your father's calm but stern gaze never wavered. Eventually Mr. Kotoya sighed and reached out to brush some of his long white hair from his old face. 

"My apologies...I guess I was just desperate for both our children to reunite and allow to have some happiness in his life after so much misfortune. He deserves to be happy for once."

"That still does not explain your actions. My family deserves an explanation for all this madness."

Again Kotoya sighed. "You're right. You're right. That's the least I could do for causing you all so much trouble. You see ..Ever since he was fifteen years old and your daughter's name appeared on his hands, I knew we had to find you. You see my grandson has always had a hard hand in life, when he was only four years old his mother passed away from an accident and my son couldn't handle the grief of living without my daughter-in-law, handling my grandson's conditions, and running the entire estate. Unfortunately he took his own life later that same year." Wait..What did he say about his grandson? "Ever since then I've adopted Kagaya and ran the estate until he was old enough to handle it."

"And you thought that sending letters constantly and asking us to force our daughter into an arranged marriage would be the best way to make him happy?" Your father's brow rose more. "You didn't even seem concerned about my girl's wants. What does your grandson have to say about this?" He looked around raising a brow more. "Actually...Where is this young man? I want to see him. I want to talk to him too."

At this Kotoya lit back up and smiled hopefully. "You mean Kagaya? Would you like to see him?"

Your father nodded instantly. "Yes! I think we'd all like to meet him and see what he's like. Where is he?"

Kotoya smiled wider at him. "He's in the back garden today. He wasn't feeling too good but insisted that some fresh air would be what he needed." He gestured for you all to follow him. "Come. I'll show you the way there."

He motioned for you all to follow him before slowly you all did again. Walking down through halls and past more people. Servants you supposed by the work they were doing. Most glanced at you all in surprise or curiosity as you passed but didn't say anything and just went back to work. Eventually Mr. Kotoya stopped and looked at both of you all with a smile before gesturing to a sliding door beside him. 

"This leads outside to our back garden. My grandson is currently meditating there. He's unaware you're here but I'm sure he'll be very happy to meet you finally."

At first no one spoke. No one interacted. No one did anything. Kotoya continued to smile widely as your parents looked at one another silently unsure of what to say or do. F/c eyes turned to look at the simple wooden door and just stared silently at it. Your soulmate was behind that good. The person who the gods had decided that would be your husband when you were fifteen. He was there. Probably waiting for you. What was he like? Was he really everything that you ever wanted? Was he really handsome? Would he be everything you needed? Would you love him? The questions swirled about in your mind...and there was only way to find out. Without saying a word you reached out and grabbed the door slowly. So slowly your parents didn't even notice until you slowly pulled it back startling them both. You all paused at the beautiful sight before you all.

Sunlight shown down from the sky, illuminating what must've been hundreds of flowers blooming in a variety of colors and types all around. Their roots hugged by perfectly cut bright green grass. A full river ran right in the middle of the entire length of it only separated from the grass by cleverly placed rocks and a beautiful wooden bridge to step across it. The beautiful waters rippled and sparkled with sunlight hiding the majestic koi fish living underneath. A few small trees had stationed themselves up amongst the flowers along with a single big bird bath that was already occupied by a few...crows? You paused watching the shiny black birds. They cawed at one another in-between taking dios in the bath. 

Why were there crows here? They just seemed so...out of place amongst all the other bright and colorful surroundings. F/c eyes lingered on them a little longer before looking to the left and finding something much more out of place than the crows. A bench. And on that bench was seated a person. You couldn't tell if it was a man or woman because they had their back to you. 

... Unconsciously, your feet moved towards them.

The figure remained still. Unmoving as the birds sang and the wind blew. Shiny ebony shoulder length hair swayed with the wind as it rolled by. The slightly swaying of a haori coat also slightly swayed but not as much. Slowly a hand raised, and reached out to a nearby small rose bush and stayed there. A slightly shaking hand brushing so gently against the red petals. The hand jumping slightly as a fluttering little butterfly decided to say hello in greeting. You found yourself almost blank minded as you stopped just two yards away from the person. Despite the fact that your footsteps were completely silent, the head slightly turned to your figure, but not enough to show any facial features.

"Can you tell me what colors this beautiful creature is?" The hand raised up slowly to not jostle the small butterfly resting on his index finger.

Your body flinched at the voice. It was obviously a male voice and it was so.. smooth. So soft. So gentle sounding. It almost made you jump as you continued to blink at this now confirmed man. There was silence again as he didn't say anything else. Your blank mind slowly processing the question as you slowly looked from his head to his raised hand and the butterfly lazily moving it's wings.

"...The top part of the wings are pure white with black on the edges while the bottom of the wings are completely yellow," you slowly said a bit confused about why he'd ask you to describe it's colors when it was clearly right in front of him.

"Ah. An Orange Migrant." The hand slowly brought it closer to his face before it took off into the air again. "One of nature's beautiful children." It circled it's head before deciding to land on the bench a few feet away from him. His head turned back forward, a smile to his lips that you didn't see. "They're all so delicate and fragile yet they're bodies are so strong to withstand so much change. They're quite inspiring little ones."

Your head tilted at him for a moment. "Are you.. Kagaya Ubuyashiki?"

A smooth chuckle that had you blushing escaped the man in front of you before he nodded without turning around. "I am."

That got your heart beating what felt like a million miles a minute, heat rising to your cheeks. This was it! This was actually him! Your soulmate! The one who's name was once carved onto your palms. He was right here in front of you and now your body felt like any moment it would combust under the pressure.

"Your voice sounds new. I don't think we've had the pleasure of meeting."

"I-..I-It's b-because we haven't." You cleared your throat in an attempt to compose yourself. "I-..M-My name is Y/n."

"Y/n?" His gentle voice questioned as if trying the name out and it had you getting more red. Hands gripped together. "Hm. You wouldn't be Y/n L/n by chance would you?"

"That's right." You nodded. "M-My parents and I came all the way here to talk to you and your grandfather about this whole-..." You gestured to nothing. "Situation. I think they'd really like to meet you."

He fell quiet for another long moment before humming and again nodding. "Very well. You all went through all the trouble, it would only be right for me to see you all."

One hand reached out to grab the arm of the bench as if to use it to push himself up as the other arm reached out to grab the back of the bench for the same reason. A shadow falling over the small defenseless butterfly as the hand approached closed above it. F/c eyes shrank-

"STOP!!"

Before you could stop yourself, you had shouted arms reaching out. Crows cawed and flapped away in a scatter and flurry of wing beats. A few black feathers falling to the grass in their wake. Your yell had scared your parents in the doorway who had been distracted talking to Mr. Kotoya in detail but all three were startled into staring at the garden. Kagaya himself had frozen instantly arm still stretched out and raised just an inch away from crushing the poor butterfly that had decided it was still too lazy to move. For a long moment there was silence before you approached and his head turned to the right following you as you approached.

"You almost crushed it." You didn't pay attention to him as you pushed his hand away to stare at the poor thing, sighing in relief seeing it was perfectly alright. "Oh thank goodness. You poor thing." Soft hands reached out to it but didn't touch it's delicate wings. "You must be exhausted from all the flying you've done."

"....Will you be grabbing it off the bench?"

"Of course not! You can't grab a butterfly especially not by it's wings! They're fragile and it'll only hurt them more than help them." You paid him no mind only sticking out a finger to carefully nudge the little thing onto it. Smiling as it slowly clambered on. "There you go. Look how pretty you are." 

Without looking up from the butterfly you smiled sweetly and carefully stepped back over to the rose bush. Kagaya's head turning still following you as you knelt down to hold your hand to the nearest rose. Nudging your fingertip against the soft petals until it climbed onto the red petals, fluttering it's wings lightly. There. Perfectly safe and sound. F/c eyes crinkled up in a smile as the beautiful little thing fluttered back as if in thanks which made you giggle lightly at it. Lavender eyes widened hearing the giggling.

The woman's giggles were so...playful. So lively. So sweet. They radiated kindness and hidden love in them that had him pausing just hearing such a thing over a small butterfly and yet..She had refused to let it be hurt when he had almost accidentally crushed. ..A softer smile came to his lips. Until his body froze up. A burning sensation clawing up from deep down below-

"*COUGH COUGH COUGH*?!?!"

You jumped startled hearing the sudden sounds of raspy coughing but was stunned to find Kagaya doubled over so low and far he might fall out of the bench. His hands grabbed around his mouth as painful coughs and gasps wracked his body so much his body shook with each breath. It looked and sounded painful. A shout came from the doorway as Kotoya made his way over quickly. 

"Mr. Kagaya?!" Startled you stood up and held your hands out but didn't touch him. "A-Are you alright?!" You couldn't see his face as his hair hid it from view like an ebony curtain. "W-What's wrong?!"

"Easy there!" Kotoya startled you as he ran around the other side of the bench and grabbed Kagaya around his shoulders as the man gasped for air. "I knew I shouldn't have let you walk out here by yourself! Now look at you. *Sigh* Easy, Son. Deep breaths in your nose and out of your mouth."

"W-What's wrong with him? Is he sick?"

Kotoya nodded. "Yes. He has been for a long time now. I've been praying for the gods to send him aid and they did in the form of you." Despite Kagaya gasping for breath, Kotoya shot a smile at you. "Your parents told me you were an herbalist. Thank the gods he'll have someone to care for him long after me."

You....blinked. "I'm sorry. Did you say that I would be... taking care of him?"

Kagaya's body stopped shaking finally before he slowly leaned back up. Head turning to you. You froze as white eyes stared blindly at you. Half a face covered in old, purpled scars. His mouth still open panting for air as he weakly stared at you. Fat tears stinging the corners of his lashes as you stared in shock at him. Despite your obviously shocked expression Kotoya patted Kagaya on the back with a soft smile. 

"It's ok. You're going to finally have someone to care for you now. You'll be happy finally."

".... P-PAPA!!"

[sparxaf]

Tried S9 or whatever

I didn't want to play. I just wanted to see what the MC options were because it's fun to build an MC. So I built this one with kind of stupid space bun hair because all the hair is stupid and looks wrong, like the volume of the hair is too small for the size of the head and the head looks too small for the width of the shoulders. And oh my god why did the locs look so bad? Fusebox has done locs successfully before, so I know they know how! What even is this? Every season it gets worse and worse with them paywalling all the protective hair options, and then having the audacity to give so little fucks about making them look decent (I will admit, I liked the mermaid braids last season though). As a woman of color it's just infuriating. But yeah, after building an MC that I liked, it was 92 gems. 92. If you buy the 140 gem package in the US for $9.99, that means it would cost $6.56 before the game even started. What? Just to be pied off by characters I never liked to start with? I shut the game down without buying a single thing or even making it past the creation process. I can spend less on an overpriced tea latte from Starbucks that will give me much more joy.

I know I say I'm done every season and then I get sucked in because my fandom friends beg me to play, but I really do think I might be done with this one. I'm just beyond uninterested. Their bait and switch "All-Stars" BS already set my teeth on edge, and I hate the "stars" they've brought back. I've seen the possible list of returning characters and there isn't a single one I care enough about to entice me to play. I love Marshall but if he comes back as a host, I don't care. It won't be canon to me. And if he comes back as a returning islander, I don't care because it won't be canon to me. There is such a fundamental disconnect in Fusebox's understanding of what people want. I'm just fucking tired. The seasons are coming so fast and furious that the fandom can't even get on its feet and enjoy what happened. I keep having to go back to the fandom wiki to even remember what happened in the previous seasons because they're just blurring together in my mind. There's no time to discuss it or theorize or come up with fun fanon. To make mood boards and character boards dedicated to what kind of house they'd live in. There's no time to craft a long fic for the season that just ended unless you start it at the beginning of the season before events even happen. It's just sucked out all the joy. Which maybe, might be the point? Throw them at us so fast, we play hard, and don't have time to think about it or criticize it or come up with ways to make it better. Consume it like a rice cake. Flavorless and forgettable. And I say this as someone who actually rather enjoyed last season, until it got stupid repetitive, with what felt like zero branching.

I dunno. I'm just not having fun. For those who are having a good time, or at least enjoying the chaos and train wreckage, I'm so glad. I look forward to hearing about it because I know I will 😆 For me, I'm gonna be focusing more on finishing TSIME and then working on some original fiction. And maybe some Romance Club fanfic, if the mood strikes me. Because the world building, branching, storytelling, and sexy love interests (even when I hate them) are delicious and immersive. NGL it's expensive, but RC is more generous with their gem rushes and tea parties and whatnot so I don't feel ripped off.

I mean look at this man. If I have to spend my hard earned money on something other than tea lattes from Starbucks, I'm spending it on him.

[lmk-aus-galore]

Cinema Sins/Wins Rip Off of Lego Monkie Kid.

Yeah yeah I’m back folks, I just decided to take a looong break.

Inspired by @satansaidmyturnintheh3||scape

Rules:

-I won't be counting Animation Mistakes, because Idk how to do that, and I myself am a beginner animator (more like incredibly amateur, to the point I'm asking my sister for help) Unless of course the Animation is obviously and clearly having a mistake for me to watch.(Or it is said in the wiki) The other reason is because I don't want to keep repeating a scene just to check for an animation mistake.

-!This is mostly for entertainment purposes, sorry if I sound too mean!

-I also won't be counting flashbacks as 'mistakes' because most of them are based on bias.

-I'll be formatting it like this

-Neutral

-Sin

-Win

Let’s get started.

——————————————-

-Intro.

._.

-Love how you can see where Mei, Sandy and MK are in this scene.

-On the other hand why does Pigsy have a random game machine beside his shop? I know there are apartment buildings on top of said shop but in Season 2 he actively has authority to remove it.

-Secondly is MK currently on break at the moment or is he just, ‘slacking off’ judging by his clothes he should be currently working.

-Dragon Horse and Stone Monkey.

-Ah yes the underrated trio. Sandy, Mei and MK. Please tell me this group has a name.

-Bad time to call your daughter.

-The way Mei is so nervous to talk to her mother and the way she talks as if her mother doesn’t even give her enough time to explain, like I think Mei’s Mother is cutting her off at times here and it’s not really okay. It feels like Mei is talking to her boss than her Mom.

-Sandy for the win.

-The finishing move is a spin of the staff and a hit to the leg…wow MK.

-I really love how Sandy is just casually friends with these guys. Like these guys just met Sandy a few weeks ago and all of a sudden they said ‘Let’s be friends’

-Ok MK you should really get social cues…or at least let Mei get a word in-

-‘I always wanted to see Mei’s secret Dragon House full of secret Dragon stuff’ makes me wonder why no one believes in the Monkey King stories. Either that or why Mei isn’t being worshipped like a deity by now.

-Also MK, kinda creepy…but to be fair Mei put cameras on all of you…

-BRO THIS BULL CLONE HAS EVERYTHING ON HER?!

-Why does this Bull Clone pull out the same Two Pictures twice?

-Mei doesn’t smile in her photo, along with the rest of her family :(

-In fact she looks kinda restricted.

-Also Key detail, looks like Mei’s little green hair things are dyed!

-PIF confirms that Sha Wujing’s spear and Zhu Bajie’s rake are Celestial Weapons that later tie into Season 4

-We also have the Calabash, PIF’s fan, Wukong’s staff, Nezha’s spear and two of the Samadhi Fire Rings…though I think by this time of development this probably is Nezha’s little ring thingys in his shoes? Not really sure. The only one we don’t know about is the unidentified sword and the random rope.

-Also is she implying that her own fan is a powerful artifact? I guess that makes sense…?

-Why does PIF’s animation always stretch her or squish her I can’t take her seriously XD worse that it’s usually the face.

-Mei wanting to be a normal child is so sad. On the other hand why don’t we have more fanfics of Mei and her family dynamic? Come on people the angst is right there!

-When you think about it, the High-Tech security might’ve been the reason Mei became the ‘Tech Girl’ in the group. Since her family dabbles in High-Technology it’s only obvious she grew curious of that stuff.

-On the other note, what’s with Ancient families and suddenly getting a grasp at handling High-Technology? Like bro Red Son and Mei have so many parallels to each other it’s insane.

-MEI THIS IS WHY YOU DONT LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN.

-You know Red Son you might need to double down in calling Mei a peasant because uhh…wow, the place is huge.

-Mei’s room doesn’t have a door, which shows how shitty these people actually are.

-Also Mei has a lot of rock aesthetic posters, including one with a spider meaning Mei canonically had a rock phase. That or a goth phase so goth Mei is probably canon.

-Why I thought of rock is because of the two sets of guitars she has, one being an electric guitar.

-Mei also has a skateboard indicating she used to skate.

-She has an indoor TV with two game controllers (Why didn’t they just play in her bedroom?)

-And finally she has some things I think her parents would’ve given her such has the pony statue and the meditation carpet on the floor.

-Also apparently she plays the piano? Or is that even a piano?

-The legend of Mei’s sword is kinda cool actually.

-WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH IT?! HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO GETS TO WEILD IT THEN?!

-I have a feeling I know why no one has been able to hold that sword in like…ever (They all look so mean)

-‘You two boot up the old TV!’ What TV? There is literally no TV there? Is there a TV off-screen? Even so where would you put said TV? And again, why not your room?

-MK control your strength- how the hell does that even happen?

-Bull Clone literally just yeeted his hat at him.

-Said Bull Clone took the precious Dragon Sword despite the fact that he was struggling to get it off the statue

-Mei calls her Motorcycle like a horse, get it? Dragon Horse?

-Okay now I don’t blame MK I think that pinball machine is old. BECAUSE HOW DOES THAT JUST HAPPEN?!

-Mei this house should at LEAST take up a whole acre, HOW BIG IS YOUR HOUSE?!

-Mei fixing her bike is while she is chasing the Bull Clone is badass as hell. We do not talk about her enough.

-Pro tip: Never mess with Mei.

-This is why we need to give this family some doubt, okay if literally all her ancestors are dissing her and insulting her to her face because of the way she acts then maybe you shouldn’t turn a blind eye.

-‘You know what I am part of this family! I am Mei! Descendant of the Great Dragon of the West Sea, this is mine! And this is my House!” You go girl, show these guys a what you’re made of!

-A very good take on Mei accepting who she is despite her family’s expectations on her. She’s part of the family but she knows that she needs to stand up for herself. Good bravo.

-IS IT JUST ME OR IS THAT THING BIGGER THAN NORMAL?!

-I wonder what the parents’ reaction was, Holy cow this might’ve been QUITE the sight.

-Yep that Bull Clone is straight up dead.

-MK I think that machine is really just old.

-Lol, Sandy making sure MK doesn’t lose focus.

-‘Somebody forgot our luggage’ then she stares directly at the dad and said dad doesn’t give a damn.

-The fact that Mei has to apologize first before getting praised is messed up as hell. If someone is trying to steal a really powerful relic such as that, then obviously it’s gonna be chaos, but the fact she has to apologize first before they acknowledge she did something good is messed up.

-But to be fair I think they do love Mei, really, but the way they parent just icks me.

-And Mei’s mom sounds like she pulled that whole talk out from google.

-Mei’s dad sounds…familiar hold up-

-KNEW I HEARD THAT VOICE SOMEWHERE. (Also apparently Mei’s mom is the same VA as Mei, so Stephanie Steph is just talking to herself)

-Poor MK…

[ninjagirlstar5]

I love Haru, but he does deserve to get slapped every now and then for his pervertedness.

So, Haru is a pilot, that goes without saying with his hat and goggles as that's the most clear indication of his Ultimate Talent. His OG design was alright and I liked it as is. But I guess I just wanted to push his pilot design a little bit more while still keeping to his very casual look. So I, uh, replaced his vest with a bomber jacket. I'm sorry but I just wasn't feeling the vest as it looks like some kind of jacket that had it's sleeves ripped off and Haru decided to wear that cause he thinks it looks cool...which is actually pretty in character for him so it's not a bad design choice honestly, fkdgytdklymtlkym. I was just in the mood for a bomber jacket, so I gave Haru a bomber jacket. I just pushed the sleeves up juuust below the elbow to give the impression that he's pretty chill. When his temper is not flaring up, at least. But otherwise he's a pretty chill dude that just...wants to hang out and do dumb (perhaps even dangerous) teenage things and even go on a date or two. Anyways, back to the jacket, I also had it unzipped below his collar to again push the fact that he's pretty casual. But looking back on it now, I feel like I should've left the jacket completely open like his old vest. It would just fit his vibes better. But I decided not to go back and change the sprite simply because I was lazy and I didn't want to go through all the effort of erasing the linework and stuff. Just know the next time I draw him, I'm going to leave his jacket open. Also, I find it interesting that Haru's OG sprite has what looks to be a military symbol on his sleeve?? And his likes aside from women (of course) is also the military, at least according to the wiki. Which makes me think that Haru is a military brat of some sort, like one of his parents, probably his dad, was a pilot for the military or something. I could just be overanalyzing this but I don't think LINUJ would add these to his character without some kind of purpose. It'd be better if we actually had an idea of what his home life actually was, but alas, all we got in his FTEs was his love life (and his guilt over his role in Kiyoka's death, oof). Anyways, I decided to make that symbol on his sleeve a little more clearer on his jacket and I changed his necklace to dog tags to tie it all together. I found his blue necklace in his OG design kinda just...there...to fill in some space on his torso. And I thought it was kinda meh and out of place for such a plain necklace, so changing it to a pair of dog tags fits the whole military thing way better. After that, I changed his shoes to boots and gave him a ponytail cause...honestly, I just wanted to give him a ponytail. I love it when male characters have ponytails so Haru was lucky enough for my brain to go, "ponytail, now" while I was designing him. It kind helps his hair stand out when he's wearing his hat as it mostly covers his bangs in this redesign, not like in his OG sprite where tufts of his hair peaks out from underneath. Besides, I can see Haru being the kind of guy to grow out his hair, even if it's against regulations or something, like, say, occasionally serving in the military. For someone who seems to be interested in the military, perhaps even worked for it as a pilot, Haru actually has no issue in arguing against authority figures. No, seriously, if he's not arguing with Teruya in the killing game, he's butting heads with Kinjo. He may fall in line once, but if he has an issue with you, he doesn't hesitate to say it, regardless of your position. And with that, I just adjusted his color palette, desaturated his skin tone a little bit while making sure he remained tanned and that was it. Haru is done!

Man, I miss Haru. I feel like he really shined in Chapter 4 but I enjoy the little details of his character outside of his usual role of being the "comic relief."

[starkkawajiri]

im feeling better and i had a brilliant brilliant genius idea scoob. (EXPLANATION BELOW)

okay class what was the author trying to say

fatui harbinger au. SHOCKED EMOJI

sub-au. an AU of an AU (marvel impact) because three things happened to cross paths in my big empty mind:

1. "man i would love an evil stephen au"

2. "man i need to draw genshin mordo"

and 3. "i love the harbingers" and when the idea lit up like a flame in my brain i exploded out of bed

this au consists of the best magic users ever being fatui harbingers (rip traveler) because evil hot and crazy sexy, instead of adding more harbingers they replace already existing ones because one two three enough fatui for me

so basically evil evil magic users au

((before moving on for ppl that do play genshin but dont know much about the fatui harbingers, there's 11 of them and they're ranked based on strength, personally i wouldnt even know how to scale them based on their powers so i didnt touch the ranks, just switched out the characters))

NOW EXPLAINING EACH OF THEM IN ORDER OF THEIR 'RANK' starting with lowkey

Loki is pretty self explanatory, he takes The Tsaritsa's place because cryo archon.... ice...god.....

i was initially planning on making loki take scaramouche's place because i found scara's "YOU'RE INTERRUPTING A CONVERSATION BETWEEN GODS......" dialogue in the sumeru quest so funny and because the idea of loki being a fake-god seemed cool, but her as the cryo archon and overall leader of the fatui was too good to put aside

IMPORTANT NOTE/EDIT: NVM YALL LMFAOOOO I DECIDED (iwas MANIPULATED /j /aimed) TO CHANGE LOKI BACK TO TAKING SCARAMOUCHE'S PLACE there's a lot more things they have in common and it sets an interesting dynamic between him and other characters in this au, including thor ("better version of him"), strange (using loki as a vessel to create a god) etc

Wong's the baddest bitch in this post theres no other explanation

im (half)joking (hes so fine) theres an explanation

it was between that and making him take Il Capitano's place, which would have been Rank 1, and he would have still ranked higher than everyone else (besides Loki) so i looked at their wikis .

The Director (Pierro) handpicked certain Harbingers, two of which being Il Dottore and La Signora (in this au, Strange and Wanda) so that was just the stars aligning for this au

Strange's gotta be even more self-explanatory than Loki's

il dottore. the doctor.

need i say more (no but i will)

i need at least 34084 aus of this man being evil idk i cant control myself

Sufian and Zandik (Dottore) already had a lot in common or parallel in the marvel impact au, both expelled students from the Akademiya, positive/negative relations with the dendro archon, man kissers, insert il dottore wiki

i want him to be scary and feared now and then, is that too much for a man to want from another man (rip eleazar patients)

clea had to be arlecchino/the knave because. because

clea in a suit primary excuse

arlecchino's cool hair secondary excuse

woman kisser back-up excuse

theres little to no explanation here i just sensed it spiritually (arlecchino is the best ily arlecchino) + the theory about arlecchino being half-hilichurl?? or something like that? because of the cool gradient on her skin, which is rlly awesome, so non-human bonus points

need more insane, cold, calculated, manipulative, insane, insane, deceiving, insane women sometimes

mordo he exists hes here save me mordo

im gonna be so fr with you guys rn

pulcinella is just there, i forget he exists often times

only mordo can fix that

after deciding on making Wong the Director, i considered making Mordo take Il Capitano's place or Pantalone's/The Regrator's, but i was really really unsure, he didn't seem to fit either of them and by making him take the Regrator's place I would be putting him in a rank that is wayy too low (9) and considering how little there is about Pulcinella (literally almost nothing), I would have a lot of creative freedom

wanda had to be one of the easiest to sort out....la signora..... alternatively "crimson witch".......? come on they forced my hand atp

im so sorry red bisexual i didnt want you to get such a low rank (8) i had no other choice

la signora is such a badass im tired of pretending shes not (+her Crimson Witch form is amazing)

consumed by grief and anguish, destroying themselves in the process? they twin

fandom theories about their resurrection? they twin

that was it i love being normal about any interest i have . ever

[velvetvessel-powerscaler-edition]

Omni-man VS Bardock is now officially out, and with its release I'm gonna give my review of the episode

PLEASE WATCH HERE 8EFORE READING REVIEW: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2HyfHPo7Nw

(dropping the vriska thing for the review cause I want this to 8e taken legit)

Man, I really liked this episode. IDK if its the dopamine of my favorite internet show making a comeback or the episode just being really good, so imma just say its both. Omni-man's analysis is pretty good all around, I only have a single season of Invincible to base it on but from what I know of later on in the show and comic it goes over his story well. Not to mention the editing is on point. Bardock's analysis is something I actually know quite well and my god did they deliver. They cover all the facets of Bardock well, keep it enjoyable throughout, use feats other than the shockwave part 87 because this is 97 percent PRE SAIYAN GOD BABYYYYYYYY, and give the Father of Goku a level of respect he hasn't had since the 90s, especially with the ending to his analysis. Its a great character rundown of both characters, the VS stuff they pull is interesting, and overall is just a great analysis segment.

And they don't slow down in quality cause man this fight is fucking awesome. The choreography is great, especially with the Oozaru form and Bardock wrecking Omni-man, only for Nolan to grab him by the tail, swing him around, and rip his fucking tail off to take him out of Oozaru. This is definitely an episode I'm gonna be quoting a lot, especially "My sons would kick his ass." They really nailed the characterization. Also the final part where Bardock goes super saiyan and everything is a dark blue except his shining golden hair looks fucking immaculate. The death is admittedly something I'm kinda iffy on. The concept is cool with Nolan punching Bardock so hard he hits him out of super saiyan and he slowly dies afterward, the exchange after the killing blow is cool showcasing the bits of humanity residing within the 2, I just wish the actual killing blow was a bit stronger. Still overall a pretty good death though, I just wish it felt harder. (EDIT: so the storyboards came out and revealed that the death was supposed to have Bardock's arm fucking explode with the punch and it likely wasn't displayed due to model limitations. Previous statement still applies but i understand better why it wasn't as crazy as it could have been)

Oh yeah also Omni-man wins which no one was betting on. Don't believe me? Here's a pic from the Death Battle Wiki's Discord server on who they were betting on winning

congrats to those 3 people, your streak is alive... just hope you can keep that streak for the next time. What was the next time again?

........huh

Ok if you know me you know this isn't exactly my favorite vs idea ever, 8ut i can't act like it wasn't inevita8le. excited to see what they do with it since i know they're gonna cook with this one, and i don't pay attention to the de8ate for most episodes so i don't have to worry a8out that.

Overall, great episode, glad to see Death Battle is back, and just as great as ever.

[bansheeoftheforest]

A Life for You and Me [TKC Walt x Anubis]

I have not read the books since I was genuine child and I am absolutely refusing to read anything other than the wikis. I do not go here BUT I keep having reoccurring dreams about waltxanubis and I finally gave in. Here yall have the most ooc fic for the BEST ship in tkc <3 Also my first ever fic that isn't tgs!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wordcount: 6,374

Summary:  Anubis contemplates his godly existence and Walt offers comfort.

Or; in which Walt tries to be a gentleman, and Anubis slowly realizes that his heart is craving /more/.

CW: None! They are hypothetical 18-20+ year olds in this tho, and also probably very ooc

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Perhaps Walt Stone could finally learn to get used to his existence. 

  He hadn’t really had any time to get used to life, or enjoy it, as he spent many of his waking moments wondering when the curse would strike. The curse, which had taken his father, his father, and every ancestor before him, a result of the greed of his pharaonic ancestor. The curse, which had waited to take him since the day he was born. The curse, which had made him unable to use magic, resided him to a life of amulet-making. The curse, which had made him live on the brink of death. The curse, which was now dormant. Now he could safely enjoy his life, nuzzled within the palms of death himself.

  Death, or Anubis, his new companion, lounged in a more corporeal form upon Walt’s bed- although he supposed it was Anubis’ too, as they shared body and possessions. Their two souls still resided inside the mortal’s body, but Anubis occasionally enjoyed taking shape outside of their shared form, something not entirely solid but not transparent, either. The jackal-headed god enjoyed lounging around in Walt’s bedroom when they were alone. He had no problem to do as such in front of people, either, but -while he, of course, would never admit it- often felt safer when put away into the depths of Walt’s own body, as he very rarely wanted to deal with other people. 

  Walt sat upon the floor, back against a wall, facing the bed upon which his companion laid. Anubis was casually dressed; a simple black t-shirt which hung loosely around his meager frame, with a pair of comfortable pants that, for once, wasn’t denim. He had decided to skip the jewelry which often adorned him and between his lips laid an unlit cigarette, which he had the decency to not smoke in the room, but still seemed to enjoy having in his mouth. The god’s hair had grown longer, and was slicked back until it curled around his neck and pointed ears, and his skin had gone from a corpse-pale white to a pale tan, a testament to his time out of the Duat, a healthier image than the one Walt had first gotten to know. Walt himself was dressed similarly. While the sun was setting into evening, it was summer, and the dry heat was hard to beat, and so his usual outfit of a tanktop and shorts were a perfect match. 

  Something felt different today, neither were sure why, but they felt like they had tip-toed around the other. Like something delicate within them, between them, was about to be ripped apart; something unsaid which was threatening to reach the surface, something which could potentially destroy the bond they had built, the life they had built. At the very least, that is what Walt felt. Anubis had been quiet for most of the day, laying dormant within their soul, seemingly deep in thought. He had not commented any snide remarks or questioned the intricacies of the modern world, nor had he responded when Sadie made a jab at him. He was simply quiet, and now, he laid upon Walt’s bed. Walt couldn’t help but to stare at him, as if trying to solve a puzzle. He occasionally let his gaze wander to the textbook within his lap; a manuscript falling apart at the seams, a study of Egyptian funerary rites, assigned by Anubis himself. Yet, as the minutes passed, he found it harder and harder to remove his focus from the figure on his bed, as Anubis let his gaze travel around the room. They were eyeing each other, while simultaneously acting like they weren’t. 

  There was no special occasion, no real reason for Anubis to take form outside of Walt’s own body, but he seemed to have gotten bold lately. He enjoyed feeling like another person in Walt’s company, rather than a part of him, a voice in the back of his head, an occasional remark or question. Anubis seemed content with merely basking and lounging whenever he had the opportunity, and Walt was not one to force his friend to be productive. He would be taking every moment to rest too, had he resided so long in the underworld. 

  Still, as Anubis did not speak, neither did Walt, not wanting to intrude on the god currently intruding on him. Despite their history, Anubis was rarely social, almost shy, never conversing more or in further depths than necessary, although he was often more sociable with Walt himself. Walt knew better than to coax him out of his shell, and yet, Anubis held his emotions upon his sleeve- or perhaps he felt so strongly that Walt could practically feel it in the air, or perhaps it was simply the part of him, deep within his chest, that made him understand. Carter often remarked that Anubis seemed emotionless, apathetic, unreadable, but Walt felt that he couldn’t be further from the truth. 

  Anubis was in thought, perhaps uncertain. He was not looking at Walt anymore, instead he glanced off into the distance while chewing on the end of his cigarette, which Walt couldn’t imagine to be appetizing. Perhaps it was his position, the way he laid, or perhaps it was the expression upon his face, which read as something more than mere zoning-out. He felt- or looked- awfully human. 

  Finally, the jackal-god sighed, removing the cigarette from his lips and letting it vanish in thin air. His head fell back into the pillows of the bed. A sign of giving up. The first emotional movement he had done all day.

  Walt looked up, and Anubis made no attempt to move. He could see every movement from where he currently sat, every rise and fall of his torso as he breathed, from his covered chest and down to his abdomen, where the shirt hiked up ever so slightly. It made the rest of the lean body move with it, exaggerated with the soft pillows which followed his every move. It looked almost sensual- a thought he just a year ago would never have thought he would ever think, especially not now, as the uncertainty settled between them.

  He hesitated, but cleared his throat. As Anubis didn’t react, he asked; 

  “What are you thinking about?” 

  Anubis didn’t respond for quite a while. The uncertainty still hung in the air, perhaps clearer, as the god weighed his options. Perhaps attempting to find a way to explain, or to come up with an excuse. Walt watched as another sigh accentuated the movement of the god’s body. Finally, the god spoke.

  “I am not sure.” 

  There was no stutter, no hesitance as the words were said, yet it was still felt as Walt considered the words for a moment. 

  “Would you like to talk about it?”. 

  Once more, silence. Walt realized that he was quite captivated with the rise and fall of Anubis’ chest, while Anubis wondered if this -whatever thoughts that swirled in his head, his worries, his feelings- is what had caused their tension.

  “I am not sure you would like to listen.” 

  Walt adjusted his position slightly, straightening his back, despite Anubis not being able to see him; like he was trying to prove that of course he would listen, of course he could be trusted with whatever it was that bothered the other. A challenge, or a test, a way for Walt to prove that he was someone to confide in. It had been years, and sometimes it felt like Anubis still struggled to trust Walt, to confide in him, to remember that he was his Eye and his closest friend. For Walt, it did not feel like it was his god laying upon his bed, nor the sole reason for his current survival. He was just a friend. Someone closer, something deeper. Something intimate but unsaid, unknown between them.

  “Of course I'll listen”, for you.

  Walt debated moving closer, perhaps it would make Anubis feel... Calmer, or safer. He wasn't sure, nor was he sure why Anubis wouldn’t feel safe, why he thought he wouldn’t. His wish to ease his worries only felt... Natural.

  Anubis, as usual, seemed to consider his words. He shifted, as if he wanted to move, but was unsure if it would be a smart choice; like he wanted to be seen, but didn’t dare to be seen. Walt could not see much more than the god’s torso, but saw how his arm shifted to push his hair from his face. Unnaturally human.

  “I am debating,” the god finally spoke, “how human it is to be... A god.”

  Walt perked up slightly. He considered the sentence, tasting the words on his tongue for a moment. He had not expected something so philosophical, or perhaps he had, something deep only a god of mortality could think up. 

  “Oh?” 

  He saw how the other hesitated. The tan body was tense, and he could almost see the translucent veins pop against the god’s skin all the way from where he was sitting. Finally, Anubis moved, sitting up and leaning against the wall to which the bed was pushed against. His eyes were closed, and his head tilted slightly upward. A sign of acceptance. Walt waited with bated breath, eager to hear the thoughts and feelings his god would spill for him.

  “I do not feel like a god.” Anubis started, his voice was quiet. “I do not feel divine or holy or powerful. I do not feel like I behave like the other gods, or that I properly fit in with them. It feels unnatural to feel and yet I feel. And….”

  He trailed off. His face scrunched and he closed his eyes, frustrated with himself, moving his hand as to wave himself off, as if to make Walt forget that he ever spoke, having committed the grievous sin of sharing his feelings, with a mortal no less. Embarrassed, perhaps humiliated, mortified that he revealed his own feelings to his own host. Or perhaps relieved to get the thoughts that were harbored within his soul put into words. Walt finally stood up, placing the book he had in his lap aside, and took a seat next to the god, mirroring his position as their backs rested against the cold wall. Anubis opened his eyes once more. As they looked at each other, Walt attempted to smile comfortingly. Anubis’ face twisted into more uncertainty. 

  “I think that is perfectly normal,” Walt replied, taking a chance as he gently placed his hand upon Anubis’ lower arm, which was currently resting against the latter’s lap. “Just because you are a deity, doesn’t mean you are simply an unconscious force. You have a soul too, you know. Souls feel. ” 

  Anubis looked between Walt and the place of physical touch, slightly bewildered. He was right, of course, he knew that he had a soul, yet it was hard for him to grasp the mortal’s words. He had a soul. And with a soul came personality, and feelings. With a soul comes differences.  

  “I... I feel left behind.” Anubis confessed, quietly, barely above a whisper, looking straight ahead. “Like the others- like they understand more. I should have grown up by now, and yet I am a mere child.” 

  Walt continued to look at him, let him speak in peace, until silence settled. His gaze softened, and he gave the other’s wrist a comforting squeeze.

  “Well, that is not odd. You were left behind. But it doesn’t have to mean that you are alone anymore. We will grow, together.” 

  Of course he was not alone now. He had Walt, and the thought of growing together with him, spiritually and physically, felt comforting. In some capacity, he even had the rest of the House of Life. Until the day of Walt’s natural death, or his chosen separation, Anubis would be a part of him, something buried within his very soul, his very person. And as Walt’s soul left their constructed body, Anubis would return to the Underworld, for another four thousand years to pass as he resided barely any time at all in the Duat. It had taken him four thousand years of his existence to find his first host, he doubted he would find another one anytime soon. But until then, he had Walt, perhaps Sadie and Carter as well, perhaps the rest of the House, even if not all of them seemed to particularly trust him. Even if he did not seem to particularly trust them.

  “... Yes, you may be right.” 

  Anubis didn’t sound entirely convinced, and Walt understood that he may not feel like talking about it further, yet he did not want to leave the other feeling uncertain, or misplaced.

  “I do not think that you are questioning things unnecessarily,” Walt continued, although his gaze left the god. “After all, while I know it is a part of your problem, you are a teenager. I doubt gods miss out on puberties and phases and all those hormone imbalances- It is when you are a teenager that you start feeling properly, start to question properly. It is only natural. I know it hurts, but it will get better.” 

  Anubis snorted, but stayed silent.

  “I understand that you are struggling with placing yourself, but I also do not want you to think that that is unnatural. You are right, it is very human to feel, but you may not be a thing in between, you may just be any teenager trying to make sense of the world they find themselves in. Regardless of what you feel, or think, about yourself and others- I am here, and we will get through that together, yeah?” 

  It seemed to calm him. Anubis’ shoulders lowered slightly, and he took a deep breath. It was shaky, but a new air of peace came upon them. He did not yet reply, seemingly thinking over Walt’s words, tested them, probed them, questioned how much he believed them- yet his body remained slack, like he felt comforted, or perhaps even believed him. Once he finally spoke, it was barely above a whisper. 

  “...Walt?” 

  Walt turned and gave Anubis his full attention.

  “Yeah?”

  “...Thank you.” 

  Walt couldn’t help but smile, a bright smile which could light up the whole room. Anubis actually looked at him, and his gaze was soft, an equally gentle smile upon his lips. For a moment, Walt felt the air in his lungs, warm and thick, breath hitched as he fully took in the god’s face, like he was seeing it for the first time, for a new time. The beautiful skin, noticeably pale and yet not chalky white anymore. A sharp, androgynous jaw and beautiful black hair, slicked back, accumulated into soft locks at the back of his head, the urge to run his fingers through the soft mass was overwhelming. Perhaps likening his image to a ‘Greek god’ would be a bit too ironic, but there were few words to describe Anubis’ beauty. The pantheon was filled with beautiful gods and beautiful magicians, none could compare to him, the Egyptian Aphrodite. 

  “Of course,” Walt finally said, breathless, “any time.” 

  His gaze had stayed a bit too long, the god’s expression was questioning, yet Walt simply looked away once more.

  As they settled into silence, the mortal let his thoughts wander. It was a bit funny to think about the situation they were in, as they sat upon Walt’s bed, practically holding hands. It had been years since they first met, since he became the god’s host. Their bond, their relationship, which had started as pure distrust from Walt’s side, a misunderstanding, disproving of Anubis’ relationship with Sadie, to relief to hear that the god had no intentions of such a relationship with her. As the distrust settled, it became transactional, or perhaps mutually beneficial; as Anubis’ host, Walt could live, and Anubis could have his own life. By now, Walt saw a side of the god that he now wasn’t even sure Anubis had seen himself; something... Perhaps not self conscious but certainly not confident, more awkward, shy, but curious, willing to learn and listen to adapt to the world around him. Something passionate, something willing. His reputation for a constant, horrid mood was something Walt rarely saw, perhaps it was the fact that the god finally got to breathe fresh air and feel the warm sun on his skin. He had survived to be a young adult, thanks to him, and Anubis got his own life too. They had survived, together. 

  For a moment, Walt wondered what the Kanes would have thought, if they had entered the bedroom this very moment. At the same time, he couldn't care less. This had nothing to do with them, and all to do with the bond between a host and his god.

  He was brought out of his thoughts as he felt a pressure against his shoulder, weighing him down ever so slightly. As he looked to his side, he saw Anubis’ head rested against him. It was rare for the god to initiate physical contact, and yet now he let his host become his personal pillow. His eyes were closed, had Walt not known better he would have thought he was asleep. To think that a god with a reputation of being cold, cruel, fiery, was now happily cuddled up against his arm, peaceful, quite intimate- Walt could not help but to smile, and press his own head against Anubis’. 

...

  They stayed like that for quite a while, he wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but it was getting late. What was previously a beautiful afternoon had quickly turned into a painted sunset, and now the darkness gave way for the stars and the moon, the cycle of night. It pained him to move and disturb the delicate moment they now were in- he knew that Anubis didn’t need to rest, but Walt was merely human, and knew his lack of sleep would affect Anubis as well. 

  “Hey, buddy?” 

  Anubis cranked open a lazy eye, which turned to look at the mortal, unimpressed.

  “It is getting late, perhaps we should tuck in.” 

  Anubis furrowed his eyebrows, yet moved away from the other. His disappointment was clear on his face, yet neither said anything. Walt got up, stretched for a few moments, and moved towards his dresser on the other side of the room. He rummaged for a suitable sleeping shirt, and began to strip down into his underwear. It did not matter that Anubis was behind him- at least he did not care- after all, they shared a body, and what the god now saw was nothing new. Yet, Anubis blushed and looked away. It was one thing to be in the body while clothing was removed, but to be a spectator and watch made his heart beat faster, an overwhelming feeling he wasn’t sure how to handle.

  Once Walt was in nothing but his sleeping-shirt and his underwear, he turned back towards Anubis. The god remained seated, perhaps not yet having processed that he was being kicked out, but hurriedly went off of the bed. Walt gave him a look he couldn’t read, but went past and laid down upon the mattress. Anubis stood by the side, weighing his options; he could take his animalistic form and reside by the bed, or he could move back into Walt’s body, or he could-

  “You coming?”

  Anubis blinked, and looked at his host. Walt held his arms open expectantly, invitingly, like what he was suggesting was obvious. 

  “...What?”

  “It is either my arms or the floor, y'know. And I do not particularly feel like kicking you out of my bed, when you were so comfortable before.” 

  Oh.

  He couldn’t say that he had ever been offered to share a bed with someone before, not even with Walt, as he often simply returned into his host’s body or changed into his canine form to reside close by. And yet now, here they were, with Walt’s arms stretched open, waiting expectantly. For Walt, it felt natural, like it was obvious, like this was how they normally slept. For Anubis, it was a shock which threatened to make his delicate heart burst within his palms. 

  As Anubis stared, his cheeks flared up in a violent display of red. He hesitated, but as Walt did not move, Anubis took a deep breath, climbing into bed with him and obediently laying down where Walt motioned for him to be. Once he was still, he had his head upon the mortal’s shoulder, near his breast, facing the other as Walt’s arms snaked around him, holding him close. He could feel the gentle pounding of the other’s heart, a steady thump which practically made him melt, comforted him, a little lullaby. 

  It was almost laughable. Over five thousand years old, and now he was cuddling with his first ever host, and blushing like a mortal teenager at that. He should be properly embarrassed of himself, and yet the warmth of the body cradling his, the smell of the clay and glazes and salts from the amulets and natron, it was all too intoxicating. It filled his senses until all logic disappeared, and all he could properly think about was Walt. Walt, who gave him a new life, Walt, who cradled him. Walt, who listened. Walt, who was his friend. Walt, who had already closed his eyes, and waited for sleep to take him. The soft beating of his heart and the warm scent made it impossible to resist, it did not take long for the god’s eyelids to flutter shut, properly content, properly calm. 

...

Morning came all too soon as the sun once more rose upon the sky, warm rays filtering through the window where neither blinds or curtains were shut, casting its embrace upon the room of Walt Stone, who was quick to wake by the new light. It was a pleasant warmth, a start to an equally pleasant morning, and he enjoyed every last second of waking up. He had no urgency, no duties to attend so early, he could merely bask in the sun and let his body wake up by itself. Yet, as he slowly returned to his conscious state, he started to process the situation he was currently in.

  In his arms lay Anubis, still. His back was turned towards him this time, yet Walt’s arms still held him, spooning and holding him close. He laid still, like a corpse, and yet he could feel the other’s chest rise and fall within his arms. He could almost not remember how they ended up like this, yet he had no complaints for the consequence. A soft sigh of content escaped his lips, as he squeezed Anubis closer, burying his nose into the thick, fur-like locks at the base of his neck. It felt heavenly, to lay against the warm body of the other, feel his frame against his, hear his slow breaths as he dreamed. Yesterday’s worries and tension was all but forgotten, replaced with the intimacy they shared.

  The god seemed to be far away, in a deep sleep, but shifted ever so slightly, moving closer. Walt could hear low, rumbling sounds emitting from the jackal-god, almost as if he was purring. Walt Stone felt his heart squeeze within his very chest. He could not help himself, he let his lips brush against the bare neck, and felt how the god- or perhaps simply ‘man’- in his arms shifted even more. Seemingly ticklish, even while asleep, as his leg kicked against Walt’s automatically. He held him closer, tighter, as if to bury him within his very soul, and let his lips travel over the small part of bare shoulder revealed by the dark shirt the god wore. 

  Anubis awoke gently, but quite reluctantly. He rarely rested, rarely slept, and to be lulled into such a state was enticing. Yet, he could not help but to be pulled back to the realm of the awake as he felt something soft press against his neck and shoulders, soon he processed the pressure against his back and his side. He opened his eyes, and tried to figure it out. 

  He was in Walt’s room, so much he understood. He was not in Walt’s body; his corporeal form was too familiar, too light and airy compared to the robust form of his host, and yet he quickly spotted Walt’s own outstretched arm in line with his own line of sight, protruding from under his own body. He squinted, realizing his head was resting on said arm. Walt seemed to have noticed that he woke up, as the movements behind him stopped. Anubis tensed. 

  “Good morning”, came from behind him, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” 

  He should turn around, yet the fear, panic, embarrassment, or whatever it was kept him from it. He felt his own blood creeping up from the rest of his body, accumulating by his cheeks, turning his face red. 

  “You’re quite cute, y’know. Did you know that you purr in your sleep?” Walt yawned, his voice was still thick with exhaustion.

  Oh, dear Ra. 

  Anubis had never wished to be able to escape his host more than now. 

  He barely dared to move, as if any further movements would break the delicate balance of the situation. They still did not face each other, and yet Walt, of course, noticed the other’s embarrassment as he watched the red creep up Anubis’ face. 

  “Hey, hey-” Walt shifted, urging the other, “no need to be embarrassed.”

  Before Anubis knew what was happening, Walt moved, and he was suddenly under the host, eyes wide. Walt could not help but to think that he looked beautiful still; laid beneath the mass of the other, face flushed, golden eyes glistening in the morning sun, hair tousled and shirt skewed, revealing his delicate skin, entirely intoxicating. He practically forgot his own intentions, the position they now where in, as he took a deep breath and tried to get himself out of the spell. His brain grasped for anything to say, anything at all.

  “...Did you sleep well?” 

  He asked it so casually, as if he was unaware. Anubis’ looked at him almost innocently, confused, with eyes that had never gazed upon a lover or another’s body in such a manner. Like a lamb eagerly looking at its shepherd, pure devotion. All he could do was nod, speechless. 

  Walt wasn’t sure what really came over him, perhaps he had forgotten that Anubis was merely his god, his friend, not a lover. Not someone which he should have such intimate contact with, not someone he should have invited to his bed, into his heart, into his very soul. And yet the feelings overcame him, the instincts took over. Walt shifted his bodyweight slightly, to free one of his hands. He knew Anubis was capable, yet he did not wish to crush him with his entire weight- yet. He let his thick fingers caress the god’s gentle face, watched as the other’s eyes fluttered shut and he instinctively leaned in against the touch. 

  He doubted that this was... Common. Such intimate gestures and displays of affection between a god and their host, with intentions neither fully dared to speak out loud. Walt’s thumb continued to move over Anubis’ cheek, watching the gentle sighs of contentment escape the other’s lips. Walt logically knew better, but his instincts didn’t care, and it did not seem like Anubis had enough of his own logic to be able to reason against this. 

  As Walt’s thumb stopped, Anubis’ eyes started to flutter open, gently, still half-lidded. He looked at Walt with such a darling expression, simply waiting for what else Walt would do. He never imagined a god would be so submissive, although that thought got his own cheeks to burn. He was not sure whether it was his own or Anubis’ heart he felt pounding against his chest, but as he felt the gentle thumpthumpthump between their shared bodies, something came over him, a deep sensation of intimacy, of want, of need- a pleasant and unbearable warmth which grew within his chest and spread throughout his very body. Before he knew what he was doing, he leaned in, placing his lips against Anubis’. The god let out a sound of surprise, his eyes widened, and yet he soon melted in. He moved his arms around Walt’s neck, pulling him closer, as the mortal deepened the kiss. 

  It was slow, soft, and yet the pressure got harder, their movements quickening. Walt let his body move closer, let his knees move him upwards to press the other down into the pillows. His hand stayed against Anubis’ cheek, and his other, newly freed hand began to move towards his waist. He had no plans to go any further, yet he felt like the fabrics between them were unbearable, and he craved to feel the other’s skin. His fingers snaked under the other’s shirt, gracing his delicate skin.

  The god felt a jolt move through his body, like being struck by lightning. Anubis gasped against his lips, scrunched his face ever so slightly, and moved one of his own hands towards Walt’s shoulder, pushing him away.

  “Ah- Walt- stop-” 

  His voice was barely above a whisper, yet Walt did as told as soon as he processed it. He let go of the other, and moved to sit up, giving the god some space.

  As he moved away, as he watched Anubis sit up and examine himself, a million worries flooded his mind- had he gone too far? Had he made him uncomfortable? Was Anubis upset? So many worries, none of which he set words to, and yet similarly, within the god’s head swirled a million different emotions- a deep sense of ecstasy, fleeting discomfort, perhaps even overwhelm. He did not dislike the action, the touch, the kiss, but he was unsure what he felt about it. At the same time, he struggled to believe that any of this had happened in the first place- that he had shared a bed with Walt, and as they woke up, they had shared a kiss, an intimate touch he had never previously experienced. He felt his cheeks flare up, he was not sure if it was embarrassment or if he was just flustered. 

  Their moment felt like an eternity, as mere seconds passed, until Anubis finally faced Walt. He wasn’t sure what to say, how to explain- perhaps apologize. He opened his mouth in an attempt to say something- anything- but no words came. As he stopped, Walt took the moment.

  “I’m terribly sorry, I didn’t mean to take advantage.” 

  Walt did not regret the kiss, he did not regret the touch, but he regretted having taken liberties he wasn’t owed, for which he hadn’t asked, he regretted possibly having upset Anubis and he regretted possibly having pushed him further away. Anubis took a deep, shaky breath. 

  “No, do not apologize.” he said, “I just... It is not something I have... Ah, indulged in before. It was...” 

  He trailed off, like he wasn’t sure what it was, but Walt could still feel the mix of their emotions within the air. Hesitation, overwhelm. It made his stomach twist. 

  Anubis shook his head gently, mostly to himself, before he continued.

  “I am just unsure why... Why me?” 

  Walt blinked.

  “...What do you mean?”

  “I mean... Why did you kiss me?”

  They looked at each other for a while. Waiting for an answer, thinking of an answer.

  “I... I don’t know. It felt right.”

  Anubis’ eyebrows furrowed. His head tilted, and whatever upset he had seemed to turn into confusion. 

  “Do mortals not display- ah- ‘romantic’ attraction that way? Was that... Was that not what you meant to do?” 

  Walt looked into his eyes, and saw the mix of disappointment, worry, like he was afraid of the answer. Walt took a deep breath, and gently reached for Anubis’ hand. He did not grasp it, but let Anubis pull away if he so wished. Anubis remained still. 

  “I did. But I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, or upset. I should have asked before, I’m sorry.” 

  The jackal-headed god stayed silent. He seemed to debate his words, what might be a good thing to say, perhaps debating on how to reject his host. Finally, he let his fingers grasp the offered hand.

  “No, I... I liked it. I am just not... Experienced, and I think it...” He hesitated, as if afraid to admit it, “I think it intimidated me.” 

  Walt cradled the god’s hand within his own, and felt a sense of relief wash over him. He couldn’t help but smile, a gesture which was met by a soft twist of the other’s lips.

  “That’s okay. This doesn’t have to be a big thing- we can forget about it and act like it never happened, or- if you’d like... We could try again- later. We could take it slow and I... I really like you, Anubis.” 

  A confession. And an offer. A proper offer, a romantic display, laid bare. It was nothing like Anubis had ever imagined, nothing like stories he had heard from Hathor, and nothing like the modern displays he encountered in the modern world. Yet it still felt just as raw to him, an offer of the heart, waiting for him to take the chance. Anubis considered it. It felt slightly ridiculous- to fall in such a way, for such bare displays. Yet his heart yearned and the longer he remained quiet, the more it gnawed upon his ribcage, threatening to break out through the violent pounding within his very chest.  

  His gentle smile twisted into something brighter, something happier.

  “I would like that. I... I like you too.”

  ‘Like’. Such a juvenile way to put it. Yet they knew how deep the words, the feelings, the soul went. They shared a moment, where they gazed into each other’s eyes and let their fingers be intertwined. Walt’s smile had quickly turned brighter as well, a large grin, happy and proud. Anubis moved his free hand and placed it upon Walt’s cheeks, before drawing in closer, placing his lips against the other’s. Slow, sweet, and gentle. Walt’s arms snuck around his waist, pulling him closer, but still giving him ample space to leave if he so wished. Yet the intimidation that Anubis seemingly had felt disappeared, evaporated, as the heat began to grow within, the urge and wish and the pulling closer and the biting of lips. A neat contrast; Walt’s want to be a gentleman, to treat the god gently, to love him, and Anubis’ increasing urge to devour and be devoured, crawl within his skin, feel what no mortal could ever feel, be something someone else never could be. A heart grown violent. 

  The hunger grew, Anubis had practically crawled into Walt’s lap, letting instinct take over and eagerly licking the other’s lips for access, or to taste. Walt simply let it happen, let the god lead, mind far too gone to question anything just yet. At the very least until Anubis grabbed his shoulders and pushed him down into the mattress, never breaking away from the kiss. Walt did his best to pull away to finally breathe, prompting Anubis to sit up, straddling his hips. Their lips ached and bruised, thumping with the same heartbeat they both shared.

  “I thought you said you- ah- wanted to take it slow,” Walt gasped, although he cracked a smile, “this doesn’t feel very slow to me.” 

  Walt’s knees were raised, and Anubis leaned back against them, taking a good look at Walt as he did so. The mortal almost felt honored as the god panted ever so slightly, proud that he had gotten so breathless. Anubis looked gorgeous, and Walt could feel his heart swell within his very chest. 

  Anubis, as usual, did not respond. Instead, he dropped down, until he was laying upon Walt’s chest. His face nuzzled against his neck, legs curled up, hands gripping Walt’s collar. He was nothing but a pressure valve finally opened, yet now the steady stream calmed. Walt Stone would be his doom and he knew it, yet the intoxicating scent made him obsessed. This was his place, upon Walt’s chest, as it always should be. 

  He felt the vibrations and movements as Walt laughed, amused with the god’s antics, with how clingy he already was. He kept his arms wrapped around him, let him do whatever he pleased, closed his eyes and simply indulged. 

  That was, at the very least, until he realized Anubis’ plan.

  “....Is this just a ploy to keep me in bed for the rest of the day?” 

  This time, it was Anubis’ turn to laugh, a low rumble which spread through his entire body. It was as much as any admittance or confession, Walt sighed playfully. 

  “I have things to do, Anubis.” There was no bite at all, of course, he knew damn well Anubis could bat his pretty eyelashes at him and he would stay in bed for the next eon, but he would not admit that to the god, who definitely knew his weakness already.  

  Anubis nuzzled closer, he could feel the smile against his neck.

  “As far as I am aware, the only thing on your schedule today was to stay with me and continue your training. And so it matters not that you stay right here, with me.” 

  He was right, of course. But it felt awfully tender to hear the words from the god himself. Walt sighed gently, the soft smile still upon his lips. One hand moved towards Anubis’ hair, running his fingers through it.

  “You make a good case, sir,” he joked. The continual canine purr began to grow in Anubis’ chest. “I think I might stay a while.” 

  Anubis' smile grew wider, and he pressed a gentle kiss to Walt’s neck. Walt made himself comfortable, and as the morning sun slowly moved across the sky, he closed his eyes, and enjoyed the warm body pressed against his.

  Yeah... He could get used to his new existence.

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[nerd-chocolate]

My Vesperia redesign and a bit rewrite of a queen banana:

I want to thank everyone that participated in the poll for this and the upcoming Kitty Noire redesign post I’ll be doing next. Just wanted to say this post is for pure fun and not for malicious intent just like my sole crusher redesign and sorry that wasn’t clear enough. Anyway on to this post.

My opinion about her original design:

Honestly, I like Vesperia’s design, it looks pretty great. And look, I know it has its drawbacks and may not be the best design but it is far from the worst design in the whole show. That goes to Aspik, Snake Noir, and Hawkmoth/Shadow moth/Monarch, huh like father like son. Okay back to the discussion beforehand, yeah Vesperia looks more like a wasp than a bee but I don’t find any issues with it since some of the heroes also don’t like their respective animals as well and some people weren’t complaining about them, to be honest. Also if I did have a problem with it then this post probably wouldn’t exist. Honestly, the things I don’t like about her design are her camouflage mode design, her hair, and the slider (what the wiki calls it) on her chest. Her camo mode hair comb is just a bee design but with her usual colors for her clothes, which doesn’t look that pleasing to me. Her braid isn’t just working for me and I’m kinda confused about how it looks when it is unbraid compared to Queen Bee's hair where that hairstyle makes sense. And why the slider on her chest, it feels very out of place, to be honest, and it doesn’t need to be there at all. So yeah this design is pretty solid in my book. I like the design even though there are problems with it that people have that are genuine criticisms of it.

So let's redesign Vesperia and see if the design could work for her as much as her original design.

Her Redesign:

Okay, so I ended up changing the design a lot more than expected so here we go. The things I’m keeping are her boots, her mask, her stripes, and her antennas since I like them and would fit here. First I would give her a short half-down and half-up hairstyle so the hair comb with the antennas can stay in place while her bangs and bottom layer are black hair color and then her mask being the same as before. Then I would give her a sleeveless swan-necked black shirt with warm yellow stripes and the collar is warm yellow as well. She has black fingerless biker gloves with spikes on them and warm yellow shorts with suspenders hanging down and chains belts which is where the spinning top is. She has bee wings as well because it would work for her. Lastly, having black ripped tights and boots from her original design. And as for the disguise mode for the miraculous, I would have two pink bougainvillea flowers one on the right and one on the left and they each have a skull head in the middle while having gold leaves and thorns as well for the rest of the hair comb. Here are some pictures for reference:

And yes, I know she isn’t a ginger but that stops me from pushing my Ginger Zoé agenda!!

Some notes and quotes:

Okay I know this is the part where I do a personality rewrite but honestly, it is the same as her canon self so let’s move on.

Before I do the quotes, here are some things that I would like to mention:

She can be very snarky whenever Chloé gets akumatized.

She is very close friends with Rooster Bold and Purple Tigress. And may or not ask them for love advice sometimes.

I think during Queen Banana, Zoé had a bag of honey chocolate chip cookies and gave Pollen to recharge, and ever since Pollen loved them.

She may not know Pollen that long but she and Pollen have a nice bond where Zoé was mostly scared of her at first but ends up thinking Pollen is one of the sweetest things in the world. While Pollen would help Zoé with her self-confidence and always be happy to see her (and lowkey shipping her with her crush).

And her antennas can emote as some anime ahoges can even without her noticing it.

Now here are some quotes for you guys to enjoy (and sorry these are a bit weaker than usual) also I'm did use @artzychic27 ocs in this I’m tagging them for that reason:

Reshma when Queen Banana appears: … I swear to god, the more she gets akumatized the more she looks tacky in each one.

Jean: Yep and the fact she got a gaudy car and gorilla as well is stupid.

Ismael: I’m starting to think ShadowMoth is getting worse in Akuma design as we speak that is even low for him since some of the early Akuma designs weren’t even that good.

Reshma: Yep, he is even worse than Gabriel fucking Agreste is.

Meanwhile

ShadowMoth: *crying* I’m not a bad designer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cosette: Okay, I think we’re safe here from that loony banana for now. *turn to face Zoé* Right now, we need to *sees that she upsets* Zoé?… What's wrong?

Zoé hugging her knees: …

Cosette: *sits next to her* You can tell me if you want, I just want to know if you’re okay.

Zoé: … It's my fault.

Cosette: Huh?

Zoé: It's my fault that she’s acting like this and terrorizing everyone! If I wasn’t in the movie, she wouldn’t be ruining it and got akumatized. She was probably right to want to send me back to New York. *starts tearing up* I’ll just keep messing up things for everyone else just like I did back in New York.

Cosette: Zoé, none of this is your fault.

Zoé: What?

Cosette: *gently holds her hand while blushing* You didn’t do anything wrong in this situation and Chloé is just trying to pin blame on someone else so she wouldn’t have to admit that it was her fault in the first place. There were many times when she got akumatized because she didn’t get what she wanted those were way before you came here. Even if you mess up, like I said, I and many others are going to be here to help you, no matter what. Overall, you did nothing wrong in this situation and I’m going to keep telling you that until you believe it, okay?

Zoé: *blushing* … Okay, I believe you.

Cosette: *hugs her* Good.

Zoé: *hugs them back and then let's go when she hears chaos coming from outside* But, I need to face her alone. She’s my sister and I can’t sit by and let her hurt others because of me. So I want you to stay here so you can be safe because knowing that you aren’t hurt, makes me happy, Cosette.

Cosette: Okay, just be safe out there.

Zoé: I will. *hugs it real tight before leaving* I’ll be back!

Cosette: *blushes while smiling* Okay! ‘That’s my girl.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ladybug summons a motorcycle: … What the?!

Zoé: Hmm, if you don’t mind can I drive it?

Ladybug: Oh…Okay?

Zoé: Great! *puts on her helmet and gets on it* Hang on!

Ladybug: *holds on to her* Wha- *gets freaked by the fast driving* AHHHHHHH!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An alternative way to defeat Queen Banana (sorry this is too corny for you):

Queen Banana holding Ladybug while her banana gun is against her head: Give me your miraculous, or else I’ll turn her int- *gets pulled into the ground by a yellow string and drops her banana gun* What the?! Who dares to stop me?!?

Vesperia: I did, banana brain.

Queen Banana: Who are you supposed to be, my pathetic clone?! Because there is only one Queen Bee and that is me!!!

Vesperia: .. You're right, you are the only queen bee around here. You know the one who almost caused a train to crash for her selfish reasons, the one who decided to work with Shadowmoth because she didn’t get what she wanted, and put every other hero in danger by revealing their secret identity to him not realizing the consequences of what will happen next. No one wants to be Queen Bee because she is nothing but a pathetic person that expects things to go her way all the damn time. You are queen bee since no one wants to be anything like you, especially me. *grins a sly smile* I’m Vesperia by the way! *wields her spinning top back into her hand* VENOM! *stings Queen Banana and takes her hair clip* Here you go! *throws it to ladybug, who catches it*

Ladybug/Chat Noir: 😧

Chat Noir: … That was unexpected.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vesperia while princess carrying Cosette: Are you okay, Co- I mean civilian?

Cosette: *blushing like crazy* Um-uh..um YEAH! Thank you for saving me!!

Vesperia: *also blushing while her antennas emote a heart shape* You're welcome! Let’s get you to safety, don’t want someone as cute as you to get hurt. *starts to fly up to the skies*

Cosette: ….*makes confused bisexual noises*

After a few minutes of searching for a safe place

Cosette: *blushing* Thank you for saving me Vesperia, you’re a very pretty- I mean pretty cool hero!

Vesperia: *blushing* Of course! I’m always here if you ever need saving umm…

Cosette: Cosette.

Vesperia: Right! You have such a lovely name.

Cosette: Thanks. *smiles softly and awkwardly*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pollen looking at a picture of the science kids: My Queen, who are these people?

Zoé: Oh, those are my friends. We took that photo a couple days after I first got here.

Pollen: Oh so they’re like your court?

Zoé: Well I’m not sure if that's the right way to use it like that.

Pollen: … *points to Cosette* So would that mean this girl you were talking to isn’t queen by your side then.

Zoé: … *blushes like a ripped tomato* NO! Not like that!! I mean I do appreciate Cosette as a friend of mine!!! It’s not that I have a crush on it exactly!!

Pollen who saw the whole conversation when she saved them: Uhhh right, my queen. ‘It seems like my queen may be having trouble expressing her emotions… a lot.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Marc: Oh hey Zoé!

Zoé: Hey Marc, hey Nathaniel! What are you guys doing?

Marc: We’re heading to movies and the fact I finally got him to take a break from drawing all that adrienette cringe.

Nathaniel: I still think we could have stayed at home to watch some movies.

Marc: But it's lovely out here, especially the weather! Anyway, what are you doing?

Zoé: Oh I was just smelling some flowers, no biggie!

Nathaniel: Really, your cover in flowers and pollen.

Zoé: I was checking if flowers were okay and might I say, they are looking and smell lovely.

Marc: Oh okay. Well you want to come with us to the movies?

Zoé: Oh no thanks, I don’t be the third wheel on your date and don’t want to make things awkward when you two decide to make out in the movie theater. *she’s wink while MarcNath blushes*

Nathaniel: We better get going, bye Zoé.

Marc: See you at school, Zoé!

Zoé: See ya! *waves MarcNath goodbye as they walking* Well, time to go back to smell these lovely flowers!

Hope everyone has a good day and enjoy this post!

[shmowder]

🤯🖤🤯🖤 Ok, that settles it - I think I really will try to replay P2. Now it's all on my mind. Hello Darkness by Theodor Bastard my old friend 🫶 I feel kind of bad that I can't give much in the way of an intellectual reply, but please never worry about retelling anything I may already know (or getting too niche)! It's been two years since I played, and I'm realizing that I haven't retained many of the details, but rest assured I do enjoy reading your thoughts, and the passion you have for the game is contagious (I didn't realize I was making a plague related pun until it had already been typed...)!!

I totally get the "antagonist is your own ego" thing with Stardew. It can be frustrating trying to pace yourself when there's just so much to do, and knowing that it's impossible to do it all in one day. As far as villagers go - why am I suddenly picturing Bad Grief as, like, Redd from Animal Crossing, selling fake paintings? It must be the hair 😂 Yulia can help me plan out my farm because even when I was thriving in year 3, visually it was a bit of a mess, and I'm sure not laid out optimally.

Oooh how cool is that picture of the Executors bowing down before Aglaya... (as an aside, I took the quiz you linked to and Executor was my result lmao). And <333 I can't believe we have the same favorite characters. I'd be happy to read anything you write about them.

Something clicked when you used the word "gentle" when describing how Yulia is with Artemy. You're so right. I think part of the reason I'm drawn to her and Victor is they both seem to have a gentleness to them, or if not that then a stillness, quietness, introspection. And sadness. Even Aglaya for all her strict imposing presence has a sadness to her.

I did a little more poking around the P1 part of the Wiki - Sticky's animal being a kitten is the cutest thing in the WORLD 🥹

And thank you! Now I'm intrigued by this, shall we say, unorthodox emoji choice - but I understand if you don't want to say it 😆

I'm sorry you haven't been feeling well :( I hope things get better for you, and that you can find some relief through this blog ^^ I've been alright; I saw that you have a birthday coming up and mine was about a week ago! Gemini twins~

🐿️ anon

IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY LAST WEEK!! WE ARE TWINS HORRAY <33333 HAPPY LATE BIRTHDAY I MADE THIS FOR YOU

Don't mind the cupcake. They both assumed the other person's gonna bring the cake and had to improvise really quickly

Mine is still a few days away, hehe 6/9 hehehe. It's gonna be fun. It's why I originally started the "what the pathologic characters bring for your birthday" drabble series but my god it was the hardest writing exercise ever??? I was a shriveled up husk of a human afterwards and had to throw in the towel. I don't think I'll ever do the termites or humbles rip.

You did mention people that you liked my Hysteria fics and that made me very happy <3 It encouraged me to continue and write the last and third part, even compiled the drabbles and posted them on AO3 so they don't end up swallowed up and lost by tumblr's gutters.

I don't think of my replies or characters analysis as intellectual tbh, I'm just throwing up words and saying what's on mind. So I never expect anything high-brow or even well formmated in return. You're doing wonderful and your replies have been a real delight to recieve and read, I promise.

And yes, the gentleness! The three of them are aimlessly drifting in an ocean of melancholy. You get it! They seem cold and detached, but deep down, they're incredibly sensitive. They're calculated yet so full of emotions. They understand people, and they dig past the surface in other's until they fully comprehend their structure, evualting their core and understanding what gives them meaning. They're thoughtful in their own way that most people miss.

Take Victor, for example. He tends to be polite even while giving orders, using please and thank you even in the most miniscule of requests. The way he doesn't take fault to any of Artemy's mean comments or insults about him and the Kains, he doesn't take your hostility to heart and keeps talking and cooperating with you.

He's patient with Artemy, much like Yulia is gentle with you. He explains the structures and their purpose, he explains to you how time flows and works, he shares his plans for the future at the end of the game, condensing the complex visions into simple terms for you to understand, without being condcending and without being asked to.

Like when your teacher explains to a child why can birds fly, how planes work and why flight is such an achievement for humanity. He has the patience of a loving parent that wants to share his admiration for the innovations in the world with you. But he keeps himself grounded through all of it, doesn't let excitement nor passion steer him away from giving you his full attention when you interrupt with a question.

Even after that, he still extends an invitation for you to join him, to join them, the future awaiting just across the river, a world born anew. Saying, "Of course, you'll always be welcome there"—you—the one who destroyed the hopes and dreams of everything his family has ever amounted for. He still welcomes you with open arms, inviting the ripper along to the heavens.

-

Meanwhile, the player can almost make Aglaya tear in the literal first ingame meeting. Nothing major, just the hint of a few tears when you pick the sincere from the heart dialogue options the Haruspex is known for. It moves her, genuinely moves her.

And by that point, she still is apathetic towards Artemy and is burtal and efficient with her words. This isn't the soft loving Aglaya you get at the end of the game, this is the steel inquisitor Lilich you're being questioned by.

Yet she is almost moved to tears.

You know those types of people that bury themselves under 13 layers of irony to be able to even function? The people who can't self-actualize or speak sincerely in fear of being perceived as cringe? the people who refuse to take anything to heart no matter how raw or moving? Because it's safer to not let the world affect you, it's safer to shut out both the good and the bad. It's familiar.

Aglaya is on the far extreme opposite end of that. She looks for the meaning of life in everything, be it under a rock or over a bridge. She dissects everyone's words, she tests how much their weight would truly hold up against feathers in the brutal scales of her mind.

She isn't afraid to feel emotions. She isn't afraid to face herself and her vulnerability as a human being. To be raw and open, completely unphased by the spears piercing into her soft bare flesh because she knows pain is part of being human. That pain is the price of growing up. Part of the process of being a full-fledged being with a soul.

She is not controlled by her ego nor pride. She knows that she knows nothing which is the greatest strength she holds over all of the factions in pathologic, which is the sole reason she is able to outsmart and manipulation the bachelor himself in his own game of chess.

She understands pain, she understands happiness and she understands what it's like to not have a purpose. To struggle to survive when your life is at the mercy of the whims of children.

Aglaya is probably the most emotional character in all of Pathologic for how many feelings she contains and doesn't shy away from. The rollercoaster these 5 days have been to her since she arrived in town. Dealing with anger and revenge with Daniil, discovering trust, love, and a new meaning for life with Artemy, learning about powers beyond anyone's control with Clara.

It is ironic how she appears as the most cold and apathetic to onlookers based on their personal opinions of her.

Yet not even a single crack forms in her sanity. She accepts the theory of the town being alive almost immediately.

She thinks. Truly uses both her brain & heart, and doesn't make her decisions based on personal biases and gut feelings.

Cogito ergo eum

Therefore, she is.

-

On a last note, Sticky's animal being a kitten genuinely made my week so much better. I kept thinking about that fact whenever I was in a bad mood and how fitting it is since he clings after Artemy left and right, following him and fearing abandonment just because his dad took too long in the shower once ouch my heart. It's so fitting!!!

A cub and a kitten!!! what more could you ask for??

That detail definitely slipped me by, thank you so much for bringing it up to me. My life just got ten times better with that imagery in my head.

I hope you have a wonderful day! I had fun writing this <3 thanks for existing.

[devilishdelights]

Oohhh I’d love to hear your character breakdown for Asmo! 💕

Sexuality Headcanon: Pansexual!

Gender Headcanon: genderfluid!

More under the cut because I rambled big time

A ship I have with said character: granted I feel like with every one of these the first choice is going to be MC, since it is a dating game, but I’m gonna opt out on mentioning MC for now. A classic ship is asmo/solomon, and I don’t imagine it’s healthy for obvious reasons but it is ohhh so interesting. Twisted dynamics. Who’s really the master at play here? Asmo is portrayed as lighthearted and ‘airheaded’, but then he has his serious moments and moments where he threatens to rip out your heart. (A true romantic <3) what I vaguely know about their created pact is Solomon used asmo’s powers to essentially build his reputation up? And a castle, or something. I dunno lol. And then Asmo sent Solomon off somewhere and took over his position until Sol managed to find his way back and put Asmo back in his place.

Ik there’s multiple versions on uh. Biblical lore. Yeah. And I went on a wiki deep dive on these guys at 4 am and that’s what stuck out to me the most about the two.

Some back and forth fuckery, essentially! I dig that. I like it. I imagine they were very snappy yet very flirty with each other at first. Intense. Solomon was more demanding. But then, years and years go by, to where we are canonically in the obey me universe, and they’re relatively chill with each other. Still flirty, but lighthearted. They’ve been around each other for so long, there’s a twisted trust in that. Asmo knows of Solomon’s ultimate goals, and Sol knows that Asmo knows this, and it’s, whatever. Whatever happens will happen. Asmo is curious to see if Sol will ever get to where he wants to be, and whatever happens after that will be dealt with then. Asmo says “it’s future Asmo’s problem.” I rambled here lol, so these are just unfiltered thoughts bordering on my own headcanon’s of the characters and their stories as opposed to canon.

A BROTP I have with said character: Satan. If these two are together, and you’re one of their brothers, they are fucking Insufferable. I know this. I know it in my soul. They are THEE most annoying siblings ever when they’re together. It’s like their entire life purpose is to annoy the shit out of you. And they won’t even be doing anything. You’re sitting in the same room as them. Satan’s reading his book, Asmo’s doing his nails. They’re not looking at you. But you know. You know. On some spiritual level they’re looking at you and giggling and talking shit. Eventually you leave because, well you just have to. Once you do and you’re out of earshot, they start cackling like a bunch of hyenas. I know it’s a beel and belphie thing to have that mind connection kinda deal, but I think these two have it too. They just know what the other is thinking, and it’s because they just know each other.

Asmo helps Satan with his hair, another hc I like is that Satan’s natural hair is black, so Asmo helps him bleach it blonde and touches up the roots when needed.

Another thing - when Satan was first brought into existence, I like to think Asmo was the only one who didn’t tiptoe around him. “Who’s this kid think he is, talking to me like that?” Asmo stands up for himself and goes against Satan when he’s being a brat. That made Satan feel less like a stranger, and more like a brother, so I imagine they have the closest relationship.

It’s also canon they’re each other’s most trusted, and that’s so sweet. I imagine they both have the biggest soft spots for the other and would drop everything just to make sure the other is alright.

A NOTP I have with said character: the brothers, but as I said with MC I’m gonna opt out on mentioning this because it’s just a given. I don’t ship any of the brothers with each other because they’re brothers. Even if they’re not related by ‘blood,’ they’re still brothers. Maybe I’ll say Asmo/Solomon is a NOTP despite also shipping them, and that’s if I want to go the healthy route and have them both in healthy relationships, because solodeus is not a healthy ship once you get down to what sol’s ultimate goals are.

A random headcanon: Ok, no one likes the sprites, yeah? They leave much to be desired. One complaint i’ve seen a couple people mention about Asmo’s sprite is his bug-eyed expressions. And… I like it. He looks like a freak. so I hc that he has a slightly unnerving appearance, there’s something in his eyes that’s unhinged, yet you can’t help but be attracted. (He’s a freak!! I love him)

Another hc is that he experiences bloodlust as much as sexual/romantic lust. Ripping hearts out is fun! He’s so cute when he’s covered in blood, don’t you just want to take a picture? Again, he’s soooo unhinged. I love it. Also can imagine Asmo indulging in Satan’s murderous tendencies the most out of everyone, which is another factor in why they’re so close.

General Opinion over said character: he’s so sweet ultimately :( biggest sweetheart ever. He was the first character i was really into, he was just too cute and flirty, and someone that’d be easy to banter and flirt back with. When we were at the retreat in dia’s castle, after we formed a pact with asmo, And when he was just observing us, and every detail of us back in our shared room? hello. 😵‍💫. Some intricate rituals happening rn. I think he’d give the softest hugs too.

[quillyfied]

Hellaverse Theories: Helluva Boss S2E3

Welcome to Quilly’s Hellaverse Theories, where I overthink the entire Hellaverse! Second on this freight train I’m trying to keep rolling for tonight is a VERY good episode, Exes and Oohs! Not as much to chew on here as far as predicting future episodes and character arcs goes, but good at filling in some very disturbing gaps for Moxxie, so let’s go! (Spoiler alert: last one for tonight, I take way too long even when there's not as much theorizing to be done.)

S2E3, coming in hot!

Oooh, great, starting off strong with the fat jokes again. And reminding us that Moxxie is desperately insecure. Wheeeeee.

…why does Blitzo have a stone bust of himself?

Y’know what, stupid question, I rescind that.

Also, I wish more than anything that we got clear shots of the whiteboard, because of COURSE I want to know the Secret Lore of Blitzo’s horse OCs. Because I just paused before the helicopter rips their wall out and a corner of the whiteboard says “ALL ARE TRANS <3” and I kind of love that actually. GIVE US THE LORE SPINDLEHORSE.

I love that this episode gives us some information that’s either plotholes that the creation team very neatly sidesteps with a lucky technicality, or else was planned from the beginning and they gave themselves those technicalities for when folks brought it up. Moxxie says he was born in Wrath. Animation team says: he was! But he grew up in Greed! Which. Okay. Either y’all forgot you had him from Wrath (and had Fizzarolli introduce him as a little imp from the Wrath ring at Ozzie’s), or this really has been planned from the beginning and Moxxie is a hair away from being a liar. Which. Given his dad. I don’t blame him for that at all, actually.

(King Slut the Horse OC is bisexual, versatile, AND transphobic?? Despite also being trans?? The NERVE.)

How often do you think porn falls from the sky in Hell? Bc my bet would be Often.

So there’s loan sharks in Helluva Boss and in Hazbin Hotel. However, the sharks in HB are Hellborn and have horns, and the sharks in HH are sinners with no horns. There are sinners with horns, unfortunately, but do you know how much it would help my ability to tell sinners and Hellborn in Pride apart pre-bleeding if sinners just didn’t get horns????

So according to the wiki, imps originate from Wrath because they were created by Satan, but these Greed imps look pretty different in the horn region; the male banding isn’t as prominent (ALL ARE TRANS???), and a lot of them look the same but I think that’s just animation shortcuts. But it does open up an interesting discussion: Hellborn can interbreed, it seems, and imps can be found in just about every corner of Hell, but is there some divergent evolutionary traits from ring to ring? Especially when imps start breeding with other Hellborn demons? (…sidenote, but can hellhounds breed with anyone but hellhounds? Because that’s one hybrid I haven’t really noticed and I’m curious now.) (Yes I am now thinking about furry sharks shut up)

And here we get to meet Crimson, who either has very interesting eye scarring or very cool eye tattoos. Could go either way, in his line of work.

Do y’all think Moxxie and Millie eloped? Since we find out later this episode that Blitzo knew Moxxie after he adopted Loona but before they founded IMP (and presumably knew Millie afterwards, but it’s possible Blitzo could have known her before and gotten in touch when he had a job for her; we’ll hopefully find out later this season!!), but he doesn’t really remember their anniversary despite it only being one year ago, it makes me think Blitzo wasn’t there. And when Millie introduces Moxxie to her family it’s “you remember my husband,” as if they’d only met maybe once or twice before. And obviously Moxxie didn’t have any of his family members present. So. Did they have ANYONE there? Or just the two of them and the registrar? Bigger question: how common is bigamy in Hell???

The looks Crimson gets on his face when he’s faced with Blitzo and Millie’s separate aggression episodes really makes me laugh. Like. Wow he really had a script for how this was gonna go and they are not following it, huh?

…so Chaz. He exists. And provides some very funny comic relief, don’t get me wrong, but HECK he’s awful XD Also makes me curious about Millie’s backstory, which I am SURE WE ARE GETTING AT SOME POINT, because I doubt Chaz spent any time in Wrath and we know Millie left Wrath and was doing some sort of work before IMP (additional question: y’all think maybe Millie left Wrath because her violent skillset wasn’t as valuable there? More common among the neighbors, less high clientele willing to pay for bodyguarding or assassination?).

“Are you fucking kidding me? There’s someone who’s fucked BOTH of you?” And I’m sure we all heard the unspoken “AND IT ISN’T ME???” at the end of that sentence, Blitzo :P He has some wires crossed up there (down there?), but even his willingness to sleep with Chaz just to get that much closer to Moxxie and Millie is sweet, in the right light. The right, very, very generous light.

“Something about him that was magnetic” it’s the repression, Moxxie. Yours specifically.

HA Chaz’s painting of nude Moxxie has an arrow pointing to his junk and says “smaller than mine” WHY IS THAT FUNNY (hang on distracted by the cute little heart-shaped loops in Moxxie’s sock garters, please tell me that’s still part of his wardrobe). Also…yeah, at least as of five-ish years ago, Moxxie has no scars. That is very impressive, actually. MOXXIE IS GOOD AT HIS JOB OKAY.

Kinda hate how Chaz’s first reaction was to try and help, but once the gunshots started…nah. It turned out for the absolute best, got Moxxie out from under his dad and working with Blitzo instead (and eventually with Millie), but poor Moxxie. With his sad puppy sounds. I saw a theory somewhere that Millie is the one “babysitting” Loona (oh my WORD Blitzo she’s an adult you can’t just hire a babysitter for an adult—) and tbh I kinda like it; I’d always assumed Blitzo met Moxxie first but now I’m really starting to think that he met Millie first, actually. Also, the way Moxxie is heartbroken but he’s absolutely grinning at Blitzo like he’s the best thing Moxxie has ever seen—I love it and I want to cry. The friendship is so mutual.

So much of this episode wouldn’t have happened if Millie got to kill Chaz here, but it would have been SO FUNNY to see Crimson’s reaction. They should have let her do it.

The way Blitzo is keeping an eye on Moxxie here, though—Millie is keeping her sights on the threat, and of course she’s aware of Moxxie’s discomfort, but the way Blitzo is slowly putting the pieces together on his own is fabulous. Love how intelligent he is, despite how he can’t exit cars or windows without going face-first.

(…y’think that’s why Stolas is gonna teleport Blitzo outside in Full Moon? Both to get him out of that space quickly, and to make sure he goes safely? Probably not but I’m gonna cling to it anyway.)

Y’know. Crimson is very committed to the whole fish aesthetic. The plants in the house are coral, there are shark teeth everywhere, the motifs on the wallpaper are fish bones and kinda crab-shaped in places. Why???

…the Homestuck in me is seeing the hook through the tail of one of Crimson’s goons and it’s shaped JUST RIGHT to make me go “Kanaya??? Where is she????”

No, really, though, how did Chaz managed to pull one over on CRIMSON with a rented suit and a shitty car? You don’t stay a mafia don in Greed without being intelligent, I assume, and viciously so. However. The answer may be simpler than I thought when I first started typing: Chaz would be the perfect candidate to get Moxxie back into line, as far as Crimson is aware. Doesn’t matter if Chaz actually has money or not, because the goal is Moxxie’s compliance. He’s been gone for around five years, almost right after he was inducted into the family, and if Moxxie’s skills have grown since then, I can only imagine what they used to be (when he isn’t…y’know…fumbling grenades and panicking). Moxxie’s utility is less important than his relationship to Crimson and Crimson’s need to have every aspect of his life firmly in his control, however. If it was really about the money, Crimson could have married Chaz and then killed him to inherit it. Not that he would, since he’s a homophobic asswipe on top of being a controlling abusive father, but he COULD, if having Moxxie back wasn’t also so important.

(I love how Blitzo swaps it around to “horseless friend-fucker” because IT’S EVEN MORE TRUE)

The fact that Moxxie still has HOLDINGS in the organization…I wonder if Moxxie even knew that? Pretty sure he did. Pretty sure he might even care a little bit, if he can be outraged that Chaz is being brought into the family on a whim (not knowing about the marriage bit yet, of course). Looking at a post-IMP future, Moxxie replacing Crimson as a mob boss might be a pretty badass future for him, so long as he still has Millie and the ability to live his life how he wants.

The way Moxxie reacts…has Crimson ever hit him before? Somehow, I don’t think he has. I don’t think he NEEDED to; Moxxie was already plenty scared of him. Threats worked. Moxxie probably never stepped a toe out of line before he got arrested and then just never came back.

There is something so screamingly funny about a homophobic mob boss who is so desperate to have his son back under his thumb that not only does he manipulate the kid’s boss into showing up with said kid and kid’s wife in tow, not only does he kidnap his kid when stuff doesn’t go his way, but he ACTIVELY AND WILLINGLY places FUCKING DILDOS ALL THROUGHOUT HIS HOUSE AND YARD. Who does that? WHO DOES THAT??? WHY DOES HE DO THAT? THAT IS SUCH A STEP TOO FAR THAT HE DID NOT NEED TO DO AND IT IS SO FUNNY. (And so performative, too—not actually supportive, just aggressively seeming that way in a way that’s still really threatening.)

(I’m also only slightly disappointed that dicks in Hell are the same as dicks on Earth. Can’t all be tentabulges and nooks, I suppose :P)

Okay, and here’s the bit where so many people—even me at first—thought Moxxie was forced to kill his own mother. He isn’t, but I understand why people think that. Moxxie’s parents fight, Crimson shoves Mom in a closet of some kind (or just out of the room? Hard to say, but it looks like he’s locking her away), there’s a scene of Moxxie and Crimson alone at the dinner table, and then the boat scene. But even if you ignore that the tail pattern and horn pattern and height of the imp in the boat with Moxxie and Crimson is all wrong—and I WILL be posting screenshots bc I’m tired of arguing this—if Moxxie had killed his mother, there wouldn’t have been a separating scene of dinner without Mom to break up the action between Crimson fighting with her, and Moxxie helping with his first kill on the boat. Moxxie didn’t kill his mom. Crimson killed Moxxie’s mom. And then once her meddling and keeping Moxxie out of Crimson’s early training was over, Crimson took Moxxie to the place where he dumped her body and let Moxxie see Crimson’s handiwork. Which is still dark as fuck, but not as dark as Moxxie as a child being forced to kill his mother that he loved. We can all rest easy that at least Moxxie isn’t as fucked up as Blitzo :P

Moxxie’s mom’s horn and tail patterns (make sure to tap to view them to get the full picture):

The victim’s horn and tail patterns (same, get the full view):

Hhhhhgk Moxxie and Millie are so soft for each other and it makes me so weak. Not only that, but there’s such genuine TRUST there, which is so…stupidly refreshing, still, for an adult comedy show.

(The amount of times I’ve gotten Chaz’s stupid song stuck in my head should be a crime, actually. I am COMPLAINING.)

Moxxie crying so silently, though—pretty sure he learned that way too young and it hurts me.

Despite all that’s happening, though, Moxxie finding his backbone is highly gratifying, especially knowing how insecure and whiny he can be in the office at IMP. But just like Blitzo, when it matters, he digs down and finds a steel core and sets the rest of his bullshit aside to get the job done. It’s why they’re so in sync, why Blitzo says he’s hard on Moxxie but the two of them fight together really well when the chips are down. Also why I kinda think Blitzo might give Moxxie the company if he ever decides to retire, but eh. He’d probably give it to Moxxie and Millie both because they’re truly the best team-up.

(How upsetting is it to try and go to sleep with your shitty ex and your boss boning loudly on the other side of the wall though)

Using “down to clown” to BLITZO, though. The former clown. What the fuck. WHAT the fuck.

And despite Blitzo absolutely doing the sleazy thing and sleeping with Chaz…he’s also on the clock, just a bit. (Also also, knowing that bone motifs are a Mammon thing feels weird, but it does make me cackle to see the bone suit look showing up in s2.5 on Mammon himself.) And Blitzo spending the rest of the episode in his undies and in Chaz’s coat isn’t hot and at some times cute, shut up. (Not because it’s Chaz’s, but because it’s so massive on him.) AND THE FACT THAT CHAZ WROTE IT THE FUCK DOWN. IDIOT. But he DID get the drop on Blitzo, so maybe he’s not quite that stupid.

(The silent argument Chaz and Crimson have about which side of the table to be on. Just wonderful little details that I love about this show.)

It is CRIMINAL, in fact, that Moxxie gives such a good speech and threat, and then gets tasered and duct taped into submission. Listen. LISTEN. You’ll pry Millie’s incoming badassery out of my cold dead hands. But I hope sometime soon Moxxie gets to fuck up Crimson’s whole day on his own. Because he DESERVES IT.

The fact that the priest just doesn’t know what’s going on but is very suspicious of it. Good on you, Father Jaws or whatever your name is.

Blitzo flipping through radio stations BEFORE he puts his seat belt on. Too relatable. ALSO: all of the Helluva Boss music needs to be put somewhere where I can buy it, and if this Crashing a Fucking Wedding song isn’t on it, it will be WORTHLESS to me. I love this song so much.

“Buckle up, Millie! We’re doing a Shrek!” HOW TO TELL YOUR SHOW WAS MADE BY MILLENNIALS.

Ripping a person’s heart out with her teeth is the hottest thing Millie has ever done and it’s a CRIME her back was to the wedding altar when she did it. Also using Blitzo as a knife. Just. I love this scene so much. So bloody and violent, which normally isn’t my thing, but it feels so damn cathartic. Just. BEAUTIFUL.

Blitzo’s happy little dragon clown face when he hugs Moxxie and Millie is so symmetrically pleasing to my eyes. I don’t know why I like it so much. But it’s the same shape of his face when he leaps out of the water possessed in the Ghostfuckers part of the s2.5 trailer so BUCKLE UP ME I GUESS

I love that Crimson is going to be a recurring problem, but I am actually kinda sad Chaz won’t be.

Alright! That was fun! But the next episode is Western Energy, and it’s late, so gonna save that one for tomorrow and get fresh eyes on it. Because hOLY HELL.

[petorahs]

i love watching frieren so much but personally speaking slow burn makes me want to rip my hair out so im reading the wiki pages on everything about Himmel before calling it a day.