#the whole time I was like Feyre girl Lucien is RIGHT THERE
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elvhendis · 1 year ago
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SJM really wrote a book where she introduced a rakish flirt with a mechanical eye and facial scars, who is clever and sarcastic and has an impeccable sense of style, is skilled in courtly matters but is also catches fish with his bare hands, is a noble but doesn't care about his title and features a tragic backstory on top of it all and she really expected me to care about that blonde guy?????
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yaralulu · 1 year ago
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I miss my faerie princes this is so unfair 💔💔.
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Hi-res version of the by frostbite.studios & atouchofmagicdesigns ACOTAR dust covers! Bless them for making Lucien and Tamlin look SO FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDD!!!
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velarisnightsky444 · 8 months ago
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Insufferable
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Angstober Day 3: Miscommunication with Lucien
CW: Tamlin, angst with a happy ending, miscommunication, implied SA(not super obvious, but if you know, you know)
AN: So sorry this is late! Today I'm catching up with my October fics! This takes place during ACOMAF, when Feyre would be in the Night Court. I tried to make YN tomboyish without making her a pick me, but sorry if she gives pick me vibes.
Summary: YN has lived in the Spring Court her entire life. When Lucien arrived, the two became fast friends. YN fell in love with him. But when she overhears a conversation between him and Tamlin, her heart is broken.
Word Count: 1.5k
October Masterlist
☼☽⋆。°✧ ✧⋆°。☾☼
You watched Lucien as he pulled back the string of his bow, his russet eye unwavering and focused on the target.
His long, fiery hair was pulled back, secured to keep it out of his face. His tan skin was golden under the setting sun.
And his face. His beautiful face. You had missed being able to see his whole face.
Once Tamlin got Feyre back from the Night Court, you would need to thank her for setting everyone free from Amarantha, simply because you could see Lucien's face again.
He let the string go, and you watched in anticipation, your eyes following the arrow until it buried itself right in the center of the target.
"I win," Lucien grinned, turning his smug attention towards you.
"It was close," you grumbled, crossing your arms.
"It was," he agreed with a nod. "But not close enough. I win."
You rolled your eyes, but had to bite your lip to keep back a smile. You watched his muscled form as he walked toward the target, collecting the arrows and placing them back in his quiver.
"It's getting dark, Y/N/N" he observed as he neared you again. "Your father will be waiting for you."
"Yes, I'm aware," you sighed.
Your father would be waiting at the manor, getting his horse ready to take the two of you back to the village. He would likely scold you for participating in such an unbecoming activity, but he knew very well what to expect from you, by now. A part of him would always secretly love you for it.
It wasn't that you refused to be a proper lady. You loved wearing dresses and spending your time with other females. You enjoyed cooking, didn't even mind taking over the house chores. And you had surprisingly proper etiquette for a poor village girl.
You could act like a lady with no complaints when the occasion called for it. But you needed a balance.
You needed adventure, and excitement. And you did not want to act like a proper lady all of the time.
The Fae in your village had always sneered about you when you were a child, gossiping when they saw you coming home covered in mud, climbing a tree, or playing with the other boys.
"It's because she doesn't have a mother," they would say. "A male cannot raise a lady on his own."
But your mother had died in childbirth. That wasn't your father's fault. Nor was it yours, as he always insisted.
☼☽⋆。°✧ ✧⋆°。☾☼
You woke bright and early the next morning to go back to the manor with your father. You rode on horseback together, every morning since you were a child.
Your father worked as one of Tamlin's sentries. Since you had no mother to watch you, he began taking you with him since he first got the job, when you were just a toddler.
Once you were old enough to watch yourself, you realized you loved going with him so much, you didn't want to stop.
It wasn't until two centuries ago that Lucien arrived. The second your eyes met, you had fallen head over heels for him. But he hadn't shown any interest in you, not like that. So you settled for being his friend.
He was the closest friend you'd ever had. He was only a decade older than you, and he had a dry sense of humor that you loved. He let you hunt with him, and challenged you to competitions of all sorts. He didn't care that you were a lady, and he didn't expect you to act like one.
When you arrived to the manor, you were informed that Tamlin and Lucien were taking care of business. You ignored the disappointment that settled in your gut.
Before Lucien, you had spent a lot of your days in the library of the manor. One of the Lesser Fae servants had even taught you to read there.
You settled in by the fireplace, reading an adventure novel you had loved when you were young. Every now and then, you reread it to remind yourself of the simple innocence of childhood.
When you had finished the short book, you sighed, stretching out your limbs, and getting to your feet.
You decided to venture out into the manor, just to see if Lucien had returned from the business he was attending to.
Your shoes clacked against the marble floors of the manor, until you found Lucien sitting alone in the dining room. He was not eating; he was just sitting there, staring at the table.
"Lu?" you asked, frowning as you approached him. "Is everything alright?"
"I'm fine, Y/N," he murmured, the words unconvincing. Your brows furrowed. He very rarely called you by your full name.
"You don't seem fine," you said, sitting in the chair next to him.
"Just leave me alone," he nearly whispered, not even glancing up to meet your eyes.
"Lu--" you began, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Don't touch me," he snapped, snarling and shaking your hand off of him.
You flinched, eyes going wide. He had never raised his voice at you, nor had he ever spoken to you in such a disrespectful manner.
"I'm sorry," you said quietly.
"Just leave," he repeated, voice breaking.
☼☽⋆。°✧ ✧⋆°。☾☼
You couldn't sleep that night. You tossed and turned, wracking your brain to try and figure out what you had done wrong. But you could think of nothing.
You were hesitant to return to the manor the next day, but you did. You made to decision to seek out Tamlin, and ask if Lucien had mentioned anything to him.
You and Tamlin had never been close, but he'd known you since you were a toddler. He had a soft spot for you. He had made sure to buy more children's books for the library, and he always let you eat whatever you wanted from the kitchens. When you were young, he made sure to assign a servant to watch you everyday.
As you neared his study, the sound of voices inside carried out to you. You stepped closely warily, pressing your ear to the door.
"You'll have to put up with her for a bit longer," Tamlin was saying.
"I can't fucking stand her. Don't you think I've had to put up with her for long enough?" was Lucien's harsh reply.
You flinched, the words cutting deep. Did he mean you? You always thought he enjoyed your time together.
"She is our guest," Tamlin snarled. "We have offered her hospitality, and you will be civil to her."
"You have no idea just how insufferable she is!" Lucien snapped. "She never leaves me alone. She's always right there. I fucking hate it, Tamlin."
You had heard enough. You felt sick to your stomach. You pulled away from the door, tears lining your eyes as you quietly walked away.
☼☽⋆。°✧ ✧⋆°。☾☼
You went back to next day, only because you wouldn't give him the satisfaction of avoiding him. Not after everything he had said about you.
Your father had questioned you when your tears had begun to fall on the ride over. But you insisted that you were okay. He was still concerned, but he knew better than to push.
You spent the day in the library again, reading something new, this time. You wiped your tears and sniffled through the entire book.
"Y/N/N?" you heard. The first sound you'd heard in hours.
You glanced up, meeting Lucien's russet eye. Your shoulders slumped, your lip trembling pathetically at the mere sight of him.
"I wanted to apologize for the other day," he said calmly. "I was cold to you, and I shouldn't have raised my voice. I'm sorry."
"Are you apologizing because you're sorry, or because Tamlin is making you?" you challenged, eyes welling with tears of hurt and fury.
"What?" he asked, his face twisting in an expression of genuine confusion.
"I heard you talking to him yesterday," you scoffed. "You said you didn't want to put up with me anymore, and that I was insufferable."
His brows furrowed for a moment, then clarity fell upon his face. He sighed, shaking his head and approaching the couch you were sitting on.
"I wasn't talking about you, Y/N/N," he assured you.
"Who else could you have possibly been talking about?" you demanded.
"Ianthe," he explained. "She doesn't leave me alone. And she's very pushy. I can't stand her."
You frowned, recalling the words that were said. Yes, it did make sense for them to be about Ianthe.
"Oh," you said weakly, cheeks heating.
"I would never say or think such things about you," he promised, placing a hand on your warm cheek. "You mean everything to me."
"Really?" you whispered, meeting his eye.
"Yes," he nodded. "The other day, I was upset because of Ianthe, not you. I took it out on you, and that wasn't fair. I'm sorry."
"I forgive you," you said. "I'm sorry for the way Ianthe is treating you."
He shrugged, though something skin to pain flashed in his eyes. You reached out, cupping his face like he was doing to you.
He smiled softly, leaning in a planting a kiss on your lips. Surprise rendered you frozen at first, but then, you relaxed against his lips. And you kissed him back.
☼☽⋆。°✧ ✧⋆°。☾☼
Kink/Fluff/Angstober Taglist: @serxndipity-ipity-blog @danikamariemain @book-obsessed124 @winchesterbbygrl @kissesfrommads @binnieonabike @fourthwing4ever @ghostslittlegf @mollygetssherlockcoffee @hawke1917 @nesta-houseofwindfantasy @wirdbeimaufhebengebunden @honk4emoboys @rogerbarnesxx @a-courtof-azriel @kodokunarisu-blog @dxjaaaa @secretsicanthideanymore @littlepippilongstocking
Lucien Taglist: @roxan1930
General Taglist: @lilah-asteria @anneas11 @andreperez11 @isnotwhatyourethinking @effervescentbutterfly
comment to be added to any of the taglists!
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emmitaaa4 · 1 year ago
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“Elriel is too predictable! It’s boring & lazy writing!”
… 🧍‍♂️
My sibling in Christ. You call SJM the fated mates author. Through 15+ books and 3 series she hasn’t diverged from that trope. Elain has a “mate”.
If an Elriel outcome is predictable, it’s because the author willed it so and therefore ✨wrote scenes✨ to ✨develop their relationship✨.
and by that i mean…
(long post ahead…. bare with me)
SJM wrote that despite how different they may look, Elain does not balk from Az. She never has: from their 1st meeting she finds comfort in him, and he in turn notices her—she’s never been afraid of him, he has always seen her.
SJM wrote Mr. “I don’t need to resort to poetry” going all Azriel Allan Poe, flustered as he tells Elain “we are born hearing the song of the wind”. She wrote him uncharacteristically open, while when he 1st met Feyre he deferred all her questions to others.
SJM wrote the 1st coherent thing to come out of Elain’s mouth in WaR to be “beautiful” as she beholds Azriel’s scarred hands. In turn, she wrote our gardener not minding imperfections on hers, for despite her lady-like conditioning, she prefers to get her hands dirty.
SJM wrote Az spending time with her in the sunshine: no forced conversation, no one hEaLinG anyone, just them both doing their own thing as a relaxed Az suns his wings. Just two pals comfortable with one another… which SJM foreshadowed in MaF through Feyre’s “Elain would likely cling to Az for some peace and quiet”.
SJM wrote Az and Cass both stilling at the sight of El & Nes, she wrote Az cutting in to set Elain up in her garden even as Feyre was about to do it, she wrote the mention that Elain was safe after the twin raven’s attack bc Az had stayed with her at the townhouse.
SJM wrote Azriel’s eyes churning as he looks at Elain and her too-thin body, before abruptly winnowing away, and we’re left with Mor looking at the spot where he left. Wonder what that was about (it certainly did not remind me of Rhys in TaR).
You know, Elriels are not just making stuff up and theorizing about the E/ucien bond cause we’re desperately pulling at straws…
SJM had Madja say “a mate would know if something is amiss”, then wrote a scene juxtaposing both Lucien’s and Azriel’s reactions/assessments of what was going on with Elain… and she had Azriel be the one to know nothing was “wrong” with her—no, she just had rare powers and needed to be heard, to be taken seriously. He didn't let her be misunderstood, for he was the ONLY one that listened to her, that took her visions/ramblings seriously right from the get go. And so he gave Elain the understanding she needed to free herself from the dream-like murky realm she was trapped in. Through it all, SJM emphasizes that Azriel also understands what it is like to struggle with rare, strange, prized powers in silence; what it’s like to be othered by them. I’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: she sees everything and he hears everything.
SJM wrote that “Elain had hoped that love would trump even a mating bond” and had her characters question the Cauldron in relation to Elucien *twice* (years apart!).
SJM wrote Az being the only one—in a room full of Made beings speaking of being Made—to notice that Elain was missing. A reassuring but empty statement by Cass to Nesta that they’d get her back….but then it was Azriel that stated, eyes glowing golden, that HE would be getting her back, despite the girl’s own sister discouraging him & telling him he’d die. Hell, Feyre had this whole deliberation on whether she’d join him only after he’d say he’d go. His initiative.
The Hybern scene is too long to add, but this post and this theory break it all down brilliantly.
Yes, Az has sacrificial tendencies. Yes, he’d risk his life for loved ones in general. But we have never seen him this affected, and it is because SJM purposely used language to emphasize Elain and Azriel’s meaningful reactions to the other… despite it being wholly “unnecessary”
It is all intentional… lazy’s antonym.
SJM wrote the Truthteller scene. She emphasized the exchange, which left Cassian gasping and Rhys flabbergasted; it also left Feyre with a significant painting in her mind, that Rhys urges her to paint after the war. It lead to Elain, aka “my God has answered me,” stepping out of a shadow to save her sister. Azriel, aka “God is my help”, indeed helped armed Elain so she could answer her sisters prayers.
SJM ended WaR with Elain’s smile literally lighting up Az’s shadows.
SJM had Elain’s thoughtful gift to him make his eyes the brightest we’ve seen—and by doing so gave us the most beautiful description of his earthy eyes, “the hues of green amid the brown and gray like veins of emerald.” We have never seen Az so joyful & carefree throughout the entire series—he literally throws his head back and laughs, and "Feyre had never heard such a sound, so deep and joyous."
SJM wrote that Azriel beat Feyre to Elain’s side as she was looking out into the night. She wrote Elain stilling at the sight of a dashing Azriel—her throat bobbing—while Az “just moved towards her”.
SJM wrote the potato scene—“sit i’ll take care of it”—Azriel again being the one to respect Elain’s presence & contribution as he makes a room full of his “superiors” wait until Elain finishes tidying herself up (cause girlie wanted to look put together for a certain shadowsinger). Mor gapes, Amren smirks, Rhys talks of Az’s mom… all because of that surprising, singular behaviour from him.
SJM wrote Az making a joke at Amren’s expense upon noticing Elain’s discomfort; our girl’s shoulders indeed relax in relief. THE LIGHT RETURNS IN HER EYES.
SJM has Azriel staying up past 3am with Elain, listening to her speak of something she is passionate of.
SJM wrote Azriel spending an entire convo with his brothers looking out into the garden from the window (SJM mentioned it 4 times yet some still missed it).
SJM wrote Rhys goading Az for a reaction as he quizzes him on Lucien and Grayson; wrote Rhys realizing that Azriel did not want to know what Elain did with Lucien (in the case she did anything). She wrote Azriel nervously stuttering as he asks risks if they need to get the sisters a present… I wonder why.
And Rosehall… SJM wrote ROSEhall: cracktheory this cracktheory that, to the gwonriels I’d say we both know you wouldn’t say it’s irrelevant had SJM chosen to call his estate Tealhall.
~~~~
Keep in mind: SJM could have written those significant scenes and ultimately kept it PG: she could have chosen language that built up a profound platonic relationship.
Yet… in MaF she has Feyre comment that they would be good together—as in make a good *couple*. WaR roles in and they’re both dealing with the very public rejections they went through—but SJM had them build a quiet companionship in the background, while giving them a wealth of scenes of great significance for both their characters, and while using language like “she DEVOURED the sight of him” “he CRADLED her to his chest”. In FaS they are slowly but surely getting over their last loves, and SJM continues developing their connection.
And in ACOSF, in the book that supposedly “ended” Elriel…
SJM wrote Az following the sound of her laugh (😭). “ It’s just lust” PLEASE BFFR.
SJM chose to remind us—THREE times—of the Hybern rescue scene... then had Az tell Cass that he’d know, in his chest, if something happened to Nesta.
SJM had Az longingly stare at the gift Elain gave him every night for a YEAR—mind plagued by thoughts of her—made him so affected by her that he had reactions to every mention of her name in SF, so affected that it took Nes one look at them to notice his feelings, to reach out in comfort upon noticing the pain that keeping himself apart from to her caused him. As SJM said she would, Nes saw through his secret in ACOSF, still it is “his secret to tell, never hers”. After Solstice we are met with a grumpy Azriel, who lost the snowball fight for the 1st time in centuries (i wonder why…).
SJM chose to link his every secret back to his feelings for Elain, as per the bonus . Why does he stay up so late and wake up so early? He longs for Elain so much he can’t sleep. Why is he staying in the HoW? It is too hard to be close to Elain given their circumstances; he must physically distance himself from her. Why has he moved on from Mor after centuries? Elain. Why is he grumpy post Solstice? The argument with Rhys concerning Elain.
~~~~
Ultimately, SJM wrote for Elriel:
- Complementary imagery (flowers and death? light and dark blending together to form something new… DUSK, anyone?)
- AND plot altering scenes
- AND chose to liken them to one another multiple times
- AND genuine moments of companionship that slowly bloomed into something more…
… Is it so insane to believe that maybe SJM spent so much page time and effort building connections & common ground between them because she intends for elain & az to find peace and quiet within one another?
Or idk, maybe it was all for shits and giggles… and if it was i salute her commitment to the shits and the giggles🫡
Either way, it is the opposite of lazy writing…
It’s SJM’s world & words, and we are just reading them.
P.S: This was all just typed on my cell phone from the top of my head… yes remembering all this is probs concerning, yes I am obsessed. Please correct me if I got anything wrong.
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bubybubsters · 2 months ago
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Usual Please- chp 1
summary: barista lucien vanserra, with a man bun that’s too hot for his own good, attracts a girl with a constant urge to nap and a never ending need for caffeine
a/n: idk if i like this
series masterlist - next part
dividers by @steviebbboi (sorry i’m using urs for the whole series so ur gonna be tagged a lot)
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You've been locked in here forever, and you just can't say goodbye
“Y/n!”
Your lips, my lips
“Y/n/n.” Someone pokes you in the ribs.
Apocalypse
“I’m leaving you here, I swear to all the gods in this damn world.”
Your lips, my lips
Apocalypse
Your music stops and an earbud is pulled out.
“Wake up, I’m leaving.”
You groan, lifting a hand. “Wait Feyy.” You open your eyes, the bright light of your biomedical engineering class assaulting you. Grabbing your book bag, you follow your friend through the door attempting to avoid the eye of your professor. Professor Yarel has nothing against you, per say, he just wasn’t your number one fan. Then again, none of your professors were really fans of you and you really couldn’t blame them. “What’d we do?”
Your best friend groans. “What do you do in the rest of your classes?”
“Not sleep?”
“So the only class you sleep in is the one you have with your best friend? The one you begged me to take with you?” Feyre’s grey-blue eyes chastise you silently as she drags you to meet her boyfriend.
“I am paying for you and your shoulder makes a good pillow.” You grumble, putting away your earbuds.
“Hey ladies,” Rhysand slides in next to Feyre, putting an arm around her shoulders. “How’s your day darling?”
You pat Feyre on the shoulder. “This is my cue. See you at home Fey.”
“Okay I’ll send you the notes.” Within seconds, Rhysand consumes her attention again and the two head off to do whatever people in love do.
 Ah if only I had something like that.
You shake off the thought. Romance is too much of a hassle between chasing after guys and going on dates, it’d take up all your nap time. Besides, you already have your hands full with your uni work. 
Plugging your earbuds back in, you head into Suriel’s Cafe for your daily cup of coffee. No matter how much caffeine you inject into your body, you can never stay awake during biomedical engineering. It’s just plain boring. Besides, it’s not a crazy hard class and you know most of the basics. You just took it to add to your biochemistry major.
“What can I get you?” A voice cuts through your thoughts. 
“Usual please.” You dig through your backpack in search of your wallet.
“Sorry?” 
You look up, eyes locking on the guy before you. Long, red hair tied up in a bun, prominent veins spread across tan arms, a scar running down the left side of his face, perfect lips curved upwards. 
You blink, mouth open. This man somehow manages to look hotter than hot in a vomit-green apron and a matching green hat
“You are not Chrissy.” You say, brows high, mouth still hanging open. “You’re much hotter.”
“Great observation skills,” the hot guy chuckles. “My name is Lucien, sorry but I don’t seem to know your usual.”
His voice is velvety and a little rough and deep enough to make you melt like pudding. “Uh right, it’s okay. Sorry I shoulda looked up before ordering.” You grimace slightly, voice coming out thin and raspy as if you just woke up, blush lighting your cheeks. “Can I have a mocha with a little whipped cream and peppermint bits on the top?”
Lucien blinks. “That’s not on the menu?” He shifts, arms flexing as he skims the menu again.
“Oh right. Sorry, just a mocha please.” You sigh, too lazy to explain the complex relationship you had with the cafe’s owner. It didn’t really matter as long as you got caffeinated, though you did prefer your usual drink.
Lucien’s brow raises a half inch but he smiles and begins prepping your drink. “Can I get a name?”
You slide a few coins onto the counter, blush spreading to your neck. “This cafe doesn’t usually ask for names..?” 
He smiles, “Well maybe I just want yours.” Lucien slides the drink across the counter, smile deepening at your flustered silence.
You grab your drink and run out before you have a chance to combust. 
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taglist: ask to be added!
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elrielffs · 3 months ago
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I always thought this fandom was hypocritical when it comes down to az and elain.
Like when Az was jealous of lucien everyone thought that was icky and weird but rhys and cas were the same way with their girls and no one said a word.
When az didnt want elain exposed the trove, everyone thought he was being too protective and possessive? but not even a second later, cas said something about "and nesta should?" and no one said a word!
There's a lot of parallels between cas and az but everyone keeps hating azriel. yet cassian was worst! especially with the whole lust thing! if we're being really honest, thats definitely cassian. like did we even read acosf?
They have to be hypocrites otherwise they know what it means. They have to twist every Elriel scene and action because otherwise...
Azriel reacts to Elain in your typical MC fashion romance flags. He feels unworthy? Rhysand did too because of how he acted UTM, Cassian did too because he was a "bastard brute". He's protective? He's always aware of Elain and said she shouldn't be expose to the Trove, not that she couldn’t . He armed her with his own dagger. And Cassian immediately followed up with the same thought of Nesta. And Rhysand was protective of Feyre. I know antis like to point to the Weaver cottage scene and compare it to how Az acted about Gwyn in the BR but we all know it's cope because deep down, they know Azriel should of had a bigger response if their ship had even a small chance of happening. The cottage scene was very much a controlled environment for Rhysand, he was right outside monitoring the situation and the point of the whole thing was to show Feyre she was capable. Let's not forget that the moment Feyre was not in a controlled situation by Rhysand, he freaked the fuck out--like when Velaris was attacked and Feyre defended the Rainbow. Cassian was freaking out over Nesta in the BR. Azriel was not. It's literally something explicitly stated about mates--that they are protective instinctually (Hybern rescue??) and even if not mates, you generally worry about someone you care about. Azriel is too lustful? Feyre told Rhysand she just wanted "fun" and they had heavy sexual innuendo flirting before they were together, Nesta and Cassian were also pretty lust filled and fucking and sucking before discussing their feelings. I don't know where this idea came from that wanting to fuck someone you have feelings for is a bad thing. Azriel is jealous? Rhysand was jealous of Tarquin, Cassian was jealous of Eris. They aren't speaking right now? Rhysand and Feyre didn't speak for months and Feyre almost got married, Cassian and Nesta also didn't speak for months, it's a classic miscommunication trope.
They have to make Azriel into this horrible person when really, he is acting like any other MC towards his love interest. All these aren't even common to SJM, they are common to the genre.
And the kicker is, they don't realize by twisting the narrative they make Azriel into the most unlikeable MC to ever exist. They try so hard to pry him from Elain, they make unviable as a love candidate for ANYONE.
These are typical feelings when you care about someone. All the happy no problem easy banter is what happens when you aren't interested in someone. You aren't as aware of yourself and them because the interest isn't there. When you are into someone, you are hyperaware of them, every mention, every time they are in the room, when they speak--moments we see between Elain and Azriel. How he follows her laughter, the charged glance, how he rushed to be the first to wish her Happy Solstice, how he immediately questions Cassian, what happened to Elain?
We all know that if it wasn't Elain Azriel was having these feelings and reactions towards, no one would blink twice and be screaming from the hilltops about endgame. Cause it is.
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shardminds · 8 days ago
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feycien!! won’t YOU tell me about “won’t you tell me what it’s like?”
alsooo rhys/eris/azriel in the CoN? What are you cooking???
buffy? THEE buffy vanserra? (i did mistype that as bussy i am so sorry)
won't you tell me what it's like??? is essentially me being like aha what if feyre and lucien had been going at it behind tamlin's back the WHOLE time? it starts at the start of acowar and it goes like this.
“It’s not too bad when you get used to it,” It took no great effort to right herself next to him, pushing up further, to fold her legs in the flattened grass. They’d have to head back soon, to assuage any suspicion of their meeting. “Did you manage to speak with him?” “As much as one might,” he sighed, letting his head lean against his own shoulders as he rolled the stiffness from his neck, thick corded muscles straining as he stretched away and then back towards her. The starlight lit him in silver shine, catching the cuffs adorning his pointed ears, the chain about his throat. “I have to admit, it was not an especially riveting conversation. He remains unaware of our… situation.” “I can’t stay like this, Lucien,” Feyre shook her head, letting—no, intending her hair to do most of the work in her coy portrayal. Sheltered in the Night Court for half a year? A prisoner? She could only play that role if if they let her. If they just assumed the same girl that left was the one that came back. “I don’t want to lie anymore. It’s not fair.” Even if that itself was a lie. If he saw her eyes, he might have called her on it. That her trepidation came from something else. Unfortunately—or fortunately, depending on her mood—Lucien would not take her word if he saw even a crumb of doubt. Not unless she forced it down his throat. “He’s going to expect something eventually.” He let out a noise, something of amusement almost. Polite but sharp. Feigned disbelief. “Would you prefer me to tell him about your mate instead?”
CoN Notes is just pure filth about Rhys and Azriel tag teaming Eris. Featuring bangers like poor thing, he only knows love when it hurts and you should thank him. didn’t beron teach you manners? you should say thank you, eris. say it. I have no further comments your honour.
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lovemyromance · 11 months ago
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Nesta being a Gwynriel because she says "You're the new ribbon, Az" is literally so laughable. Because:
1. Y'all are assuming Nesta is somehow flirting with Az on behalf of Gwyn when she says that??
The ribbon is literally supposed to be symbolic of a challenge. Gwyn cut the ribbon. Now Azriel & Cassian have presented them with a new challenge. They seem unconvinced that the girls will beat the BR qualifier. Azriel even goes as far as to say "there's no chance in hell any of you will finish the course"
Gwyn sees that as a challenge.
Nesta reminds them of how competitive and determined Gwyn was with trying to cut the ribbon (old challenge). Now there is a new challenge. So Nesta says, "You're the new Ribbon, Az". Meaning, Gwyn now sees the BR qualifier (and proving Azriel wrong) as the new challenge.
Don't believe me? Here is the text:
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Old challenge: Cut the Ribbon ✅
New challenge: Finish the course (and prove Az/Cass wrong) ⏱️
That's all there is to it 😭 I thought it was a funny scene, how hard the Valkyries tried to prove them wrong. Not a scene where Nesta is flirting with Azriel on behalf of Gwyn.
2. Nesta would never be team Gwynriel because she KNOWS Azriel's secret.
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What is his secret? Why does he stay near the doorway the whole time? Azriel tells us that himself in the BC
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"Because he couldn't stand the sight of it, the scent of their mating bond and needed to have the option of leaving if it became too much."
That is his secret. Not Mor 🤡 Not he's afraid of fire 🤡
His secret is his feelings for Elain. And Nesta knows that.
Notice, how Nesta isn't jumping in and forbidding Azriel from pursuing Elain. It's almost like... she trusts the Shadowsinger with her sister. She has always trusted Azriel with Elain. Even when she barely knew him.
Not Lucien, her mate who literally should be the most invested in Elain's wellbeing. Azriel.
3. Elain is Nesta's favorite sister. There's no debate here. The bond between sisters always trumps "new friend I just made 5 months ago", btw. Not to compare women, but Nesta will always treasure Elain more than anyone else. Even Cassian, imo.
Even if they may be fighting, Nesta has always protected Elain to the point of smothering. She has always favored Elain, and she hasn't been shy about it. When Elain seemed to spend more time with Feyre, this hurt Nesta. She considered Elain to be hers, always saw them as a team.
Not saying that was right, but just saying that Nesta will always side with Elain. She went toe to toe with Hybern to protect Elain. She would do anything for her sisters, especially Elain.
And that has been demonstrated time and time again.
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iocaisaint · 7 months ago
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Random ACOTAR takes
cw*: my unsolicited opinions
I agree with #that woman that canon Lucien and Nesta (and I mean pre-ACOSF) would've been terrible for each other sorry
As of right now Nesta is the only Archeron sister with direct connection to the Dusk Court, like her and her alone 🤷🏾‍♀️
Out of the love square (?) Lucien is lowkey the only one with a storyline that isn't made out of paper mache and hope. There's so many angles you could go: Beron, Eris, LOA, The Autumn Court or Spring Court, Tamlin, or Day Court, Helion, being an heir, or helping Vassa with Koschei + his overall friendship with Jurian + Vassa + humans as a whole and that's without touching on the mating bond even once. Real set-up wished she'd done that with everyone else
That being said, I disagree with a bunch of Lucien's stans when it comes to his characters, y'all have a power fantasy for him that's in direct contradiction to how he's actually written (I mean I get it the books treat him like trash)
If Nesta is pregnant I'll have a crash out to end all crash outs.
Everybody in this fandom bar maybe Feysands are shipping fanon, the scenes that y'all talk about and the ones that exist on page are either not the same or straight up don't exist.
I hate the HK/HQ plot even for Nesta, like is blatant colonialism.
Everybody here is a hypocrite when it comes to their faves we'd all be happier admitting then bending over backwards.
I do not care for Elain, simply because fanon Elain is so far removed from what's on page, that most her pro arguments simply don't make sense to me.
There's no reason for Helion to give up his Pegasi but I know HOFAS was a mess but when the place was revitalised after the Asteri were murdered they came back, my guess is that place and the prison are mirror worlds so the same will happen once the Prison is liberated
Azriel isn't boring but he also isn't extremely interesting. If he was a girl no one would gaf about him, but there are enough concepts of an idea where I could see his book not being awful.
Neither the pro or the anti side gives a fuck about Emerie, double points if you're engaging in that ship war. No I won't expand on this, I'm right.
Nessian sucks, that's all.
Actually no I'm expanding on that point, the fact that people defend no "I love you" from the MMC is crazy, that fact that people defend Nesta being threatened without Cass stepping in even worse, the fact that Rhys knows he can berate Nesta in Cassian's presence....like they had an 800+ page book and I'm still having to hear about how they need to "grow as characters" y'all aren't serious people
I've become more neutral-positive to Feyre because some of the arguments against her are just crazy but on that note she'd be deeply more entertaining if the narrative wrote her refusal for self reflection as a flaw
Gwyn cannot be a evil light singer and irrelevant at the same time please pick one.
Also I don't hate the light singer theory, sorry. Monsters not actually being monsters is this series's bread and butter. It'd be great if a woman finally got that treatment
I can already tell Eris is about to be retconned to hell because SJM hates a character not being vindicated by the narrative to redeem them (she already started by implying Eris wants his father dead for #feminism). Let it be known I like/d him as is
I don't get into arguments about Rhys cause I find him boring. Y'all are fighting day in day out about faerie Ronald Reagan
Nesta should've been bi, how tf did we get stuck with Mor
I have more but that's it for now.
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goldenivy0 · 1 year ago
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A lot of times I find myself wondering why in the world I love Lucien so much but then I remember that every single time this man appears on page it is to either break my heart into a million pieces (in a good way) or to absolutely SLAY!
Chapter 18 from ACOFAS is one of the moments where I got simultaneously the angriest with Feyre but also the most attracted to Lucien I've ever been without even having a physical description of this man in it (or his physical appearence being a focal point in it).
Feyre is basically judging him for having found new friends in Jurian and Vassa and for feeling more comfortable with two humans than with the High Fae. The dialogue after that reads like this:
"If you ask me—"
"I'm not."
Uuuum... 👀🥵 The way I GASPED when he said this.. I love how he has no problem in humbling Feyre, or anyone in the IC for that matter (ok maybe not Amren lol 😂) when they need to be humbled and brought back to reality. As if this wasn't enough this girl proceeds to make fun of the "Band of Exiles" title to which Lucien, slaying again, answers:
"You can be as much of an asshole as that mate of yours, you know that?"
Even though I don't hate Feyre's character (I'm okay with her), she was 100% in the wrong here, and having Lucien saying that to her face just made me like him more. This man is so fine.
Their interaction in this chapter basically ends like this:
《 "Checking in?" Lucien asked quietly.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I said, my face the portrait of boredom.
He gave me a knowing look, continuing to the door and grabing his heavy overcoat and scarf from the hooks mounted on the wood paneling beside it. "The bigger box is for you. The smaller one is for her." 》
Not only is this man handsome as hell (this is canon), sexy and charismatic, he's also incredibly observant and smart. He knew Feyre was talking mind to mind with Rhys and confronted her with it. And after she lied, being the gentleman he is, he only turned around, told her which present was hers which was Elain's, and left. 🥵🥵 HEEELP
I'm telling you right now, the way I'm in love with this man is NOT okay 😂. I was twirling my hair this whole chapter because of him. Sorry but he could become the villain in the next book and I'd applaud him.
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madameraccoon · 20 days ago
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Falling hard | Part 10
(Masterlist)
Girls fitness with Suri, Mor and Feyre takes an interesting take. In another neighbour of the city, Rhys and Lucien, on the other hand, do some self-discovery thanks to the Internet.
"We are going for one more rep," said the beefy man on the screen and Feyre felt like dying.
"I swear I'm never agreeing to this again," she wheezed while trying to complete the last set of lounges. Even if the little weights she were using were ridiculously small, her arms were burning. Everything was on fire, apart from her back and thighs, which were just drenched in sweat. On her right side, Mor on her hot pink mat, seemed doing just fine with much bigger weights and iron legs, apparently.
Suri on Feyre's left, wasn't faring much worse, but she'd skipped the weights completely and was doing her own version of the workout in what seemed an old man t-shirt and sleeping shorts. Workout clothes are besides the point she'd grumbled upon entering Mor's apartment with her patterned yoga mat under an arm and a gym bag under the other.
"Remind me who's that again?" she asked, struggling to keep her balance during the last hold while the Scottish man on the screen guided them with a too-slow countdown.
"Rhys's adoptive brother," provided curtly Mor.
Suri just gave up and sat on the mat, breathing with her eyes closed. When the man finally got to zero, Feyre collapsed in a messy pile on the floor. "My arms will fall off."
"They will not, you'll thank me after you'll realise a workout cannot kill you," said Mor, who sat too on the mat for some controlled brething and stretching.
"Jeez, what do they eat in Scotland?!" grumbled Suri, opening her eyes and grabbing the water bottle. "Rhys doesn't look like that."
Feyre's mouth went dry. She didn't want to talk about Rhys or Lucien, so she settle for imitating Mor and her cool-down. The man in the screen bid all the viewers farewell and ads popped up, a welcome distraction from both the aching muscles and the thoughts that had plagued her all the previous week. Saying that the couple had left a strong impression on her was a euphemism. That evening she had been captivated by two of the probably most pleasant people she'd ever met. And if she had thought Lucien to be the nicest person ever, it was nothing in comparison to him side to side with Rhys. And both of them so stupidly charismatic.
She inhaled deeply and finished stretching her legs. Then she opened her eyes again. Suri was laying on the mat staring at the ceiling. "I'm not sure I want to do this every week."
"Oh, come on, Suri - encouraged her Mor, who looked surprisingly energetic - It good to move you body! And we can have dinner all together!"
"That's cool, yes. But also no working out is cool, you know? Ever considered it?"
"I liked it," said Feyre to support Mor a bit. "Even though I didn't realise I was this out of shape."
"You're not, come on. You just need to get it into your routine. Plus, we have access to all of Cassian's courses for free."
That was honestly a good plus. Gym memberships were quite expensive but Mor had access to top tier workouts and her living room had enough space to accomodate yoga mats, once the coffee table was pushed against the sofa. And the company itself was very good. She felt at home with the two women more than she'd ever felt.
They all showered and changed into some comfortable clothes and waited for their food to arrive. Just some regular girls' night in, something she had rarely experienced before moving to London.
"So you never had this kind of experience? That's bad, girl," commented Suri, slurping on her noodles.
The spicy dandan noodles she'd ordered were actively burning her mouth, but they were so delicious. She dabbed her mouth in the attempt of getting some of the oil from her lips before talking. "My older sisters had their mind elsewhere, our whole family had other problems and I had too much work to have the time to bond with other people."
"Not even in college?" asked again Suri.
"I might sound like a broker record but no. My boyfriend at the time was a piece of shit who didn't want me to have other friends outside of his group, even if I didn't really like them. And then I was too busy having two jobs to pay off school. I started having some connections when I left after college, but it was mostly some mutual tolerance. I didn't feel like I belonged anywhere with my former colleagues or my sister's circle when she hosted me for a while. Maybe because her whole circle had been fed a very unflattering image of me."
Mor tried to lighten the mood. "We're glad to be your first female-approved Group of friends."
"We swear to judge you for you bad dating choices, fast food orders but never for your personality."
"Counting that I was seeing Tamlin, I don't really look forward to being judged for my dating choices," snorted Feyre as she got the last bits of noodle from the bowl.
"You're lucky I don't count it as dating. I don't think I even like the guy physically," agreed Mor and Suriel nodded.
"It doesn't count, Mor. You're a lesbian."
"I still have eyes and a sense of aesthetic. That haircut does nothing for him. And the suits he wears are a bit over the top. You can do better than him, if you're looking for another man, of course."
Feyre sipped her glass of cheap wine she'd brought to the evening and mused. That was an interesting question. She did want another man, but she doubted that man would be available.
"After all of this thing that just happened I'm a bit fought on that. I mean, casual is good but I do not know if I'd like to just go into a bar and find a man."
"And a relationship?" asked Suri.
Another interesting question. She hoped her blush was hidden enough by the redness caused by the spicy food and the alcohol. She must have hesitated a second too long, because Mor was immediately onto her. "You're hiding something."
Feyre faked innocence, she couldn't say what was really on her mind, not in front of the cousin of the man she found so interesting. "You're imagining things, I don't have a new man. It would be way too soon!" she defended herself.
"That's exactly what I would say if I were hiding something," chimed in Suri, scooting closed to look better in her face directly with her all-knowing eyes. She was fucked, nothing got past that woman.
"You ARE!" Suri gasped. "Wait, wait... let me work my charm."
"Please, I beg you, Suri, no" pleaded Feyre, but Mor shushed her. "Suri yes, read her."
The woman's dark eyes stared at her for a long minute or two, a slight scrunch between her eyebrows. "You like someone. But that someone isn't available. Am I right?"
Feyre gaped, speechless. "How did yo-"
"Unimportant. Am I right, though?"
She felt herself blush wildly on her ears and neck and a surge of something warm in her heart. "Is not really a crush. I met someone and found... them extremely charming and interesting. But this someone is already in a relationship so there's no space for me."
That was the best she could admit to someone else at the moment. If Lucien or Rhys had been single, or straight for the matter, she would have absolutely flirted with them. And hoped so much for them to flirt back.
"Them?!" squealed Mor. "We do not even get a gender? Feyre Marie Archeron, are you trying to swing the other way?!"
"My middle name is NOT Marie, and I will leave this person in full anonymity so that none of you can speculate," she concluded before zipping her mouth crossing her arms on her chest. Mor was literally changing colour. "That's unfair, and you know it."
"I'm just protecting myself from the judgement you both said would provide. THEY will remain anonymous for the sake of this conversation."
"Are they good looking, at least?"
"I think they look amazing, but that's not the point. They have a captivating personality and good taste, and look like the kind of person who would really treat you well."
Feyre herself didn't know if she was talking about one or the other.
Suri looked deep in her thoughts but suddenly she asked: "Do you know if they're in an open relationship, maybe?"
"They looked pretty exclusive to me, but it's just a crush. I don't want to ruin someone else's relationship just because I fancy someone. They can be happy with their partner."
"And if they were in an open relationship?" inquired Mor.
Feyre hesitated trying to sort out her own feelings, but at the root of everything there was a slithering fear. "Would it make me a bad person saying that I would try to get a date with them?"
Suri laughed. "Of course not. If they are in an open relationship everyone would consent to this kind of agreement. I guess this person is an adult and you don't get in an open relationship without the consent of your partner."
Those words soothed the fear of judgement for a bit, just enough to steer the conversation somewhere else. Her friends must have sensed her unease because they followed the change in topic and let her be for the rest of the night. It was only when Suri and Feyre found themselves in Suri's car that the woman dropped the bomb she'd been holding for the entire evening.
"You were hiding something to Mor. Does the person you have a crush on happen to be Lucien?"
Feyre looked at Suri driving like a deer in the headlights, with wide eyes and fear on her face.
"Don't give me that look. I won't tell Mor, I guess you'd like to tell her first. Just know that I was kidding on the judgment part, you can confide in me and I won't tell a soul."
She stuttered looking for the rights words. "I don't know what to say, I'm the first one being confused by this crush."
"There's nothing to say. You find him and his boyfriend attractive, they are attractive men, but also they have a kind of relationship you'd like for yourself. Remember what I said before: you shouldn't feel guilty for feeling this way."
"Why shouldn't I, though? I'm lusting after a committed man, practically married. And it doesn't help I find his partner terribly attractive, too!"
Suri scoffed a laugh and gave her a soft look. "I repeat: you shouldn't. Feeling this doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you attracted to them. Actively trying to break them apart would make you a bad person, yes. But I don't see you trying to do that. Or seducing one of them in the office while the other isn't looking. And also, you don't know what kind of relationship they have."
"They're gay, Suri! I'm not a man, I don't look masculine. THAT is a fundamental problem. And now what! Should I just ask him?"
"I'm not saying that you should go ask him out of the blue if swings both ways, that would be rude. But don't think that being attracted to him, or to both of them makes you inherently bad or that experiencing those feelings is wrong. Maybe you just need to wait it out or understand what kind of longing you have."
"What do you mean?"
"Maybe you're attracted to their dynamic and chemistry, maybe you wish if for yourself, maybe you're attracted to the loving relationship and with you could be on the receiving end of something so respectful, more than you've ever experienced."
The silence that followed those words was deafening. Feyre didn't know what to add and concentrated on the distant thump-thump of her heart in her ears. Suri had this strange way of shocking her with such an undiluted version of the truth to unsettle her, while forcing her to look inside herself at the same time.
"You don't have to make a choice or act on anything right now, of course. But don't lie to yourself, never lie to yourself. If you are attracted by two men, admit it. If you are attracted to a woman admit it. If you are attracted by the loving relationship you never experienced, admit it. Living life like this is easier on yourself. Trust me on this."
"But it's not easier when you get in contact with others... look at Mor. She got kicked out for being gay."
"Yes, but before that she was depressed for repressing her feelings. You are the only person you spend 100% of your time with. Don't waste your energies trying to fit other people's standard. I know you came a long way in becoming who you are, but please: be honest with yourself and embrace what you're feeling. Always."
"Why are you telling me this?" she almost whispered, maybe in fear of offending Suri. The other smiled contentedly behind the steering wheel.
"I think admitting the truth to yourself is the most liberating thing you can do. You can take the necessary steps for your own happiness only when you accept and deal with yourself truthfully. I tried on my skin and the skin of many other people who had a problem with their truth. Don't become one of them."
***
They were both sitting on the sofa in the living room with the laptop open on Rhys legs. Still. Unmoving. They stared at each other and then at the computer like it was a poisonous snake. They had planned the moment on a Sunday morning not to have other things disturb them. They were prepared, they had promised to finally tackle the giant elephant in the room together. The lazy sun filtered from the window on the wall creating the outline of the curtains.
"So are you going to open the browser or not?" asked Lucien, leaning in to take the pc from Rhys's legs. The other retracted and kept the computer where it was. "Don't."
"Rhys, it's just a web search."
"That will change many things."
"We discussed it. We need this. I have a crush on Feyre, you have a crush on Feyre, Feyre's single and she didn't seem to know how to stop talking to us the other night. We still want to be together and we both agree to do this. Isn't it enough?"
"It is. But I'm still scared," Rhys protested weakly before tapping on the browser icon and opening a page.
"Try with I'm in love with more than one person," suggested Lucien and he watched Rhysand type it in. "Are you saying you love me? How cute" the other joked.
"You know I do. I haven't stopped even if we both want something else with someone else."
The results appeared in a fraction of a second and they stared at the blue list. "Let's filter off the word cheating, I don't think we need that."
After the filter, they were left with still more result than any of them would have thought. They opened them one by one, confused by the amount of information, especially one word that kept reoccurring.
"Have you even heard of polyamory, Luce?" asked Rhys, skimming through and article. Lucien had moved to reading things on his phone to read something in parallel. Lucien lifted his gaze and met Rhys's. The second one was wearing his horn glasses and he looked them cute with them.
"No. Is it a synonym for 'open relationship'?" He'd been reading mostly about that, but he wasn't looking for other people outside of them, he was looking for a specific connection with a specific person who he hoped wasn't seeing anyone else.
Rhys scrolled thought the page, with a furrowed brow. "No, it doesn't seem like it. The page is long but it talks about a relationship, just with more than one partner."
They were both silent for a spell, while Lucien leaned in to read from Rhys's pc the long list of bullet points and experiences about polyamory. "So there is a name for it..." he exhaled at the end of the article. Rhys took off his glasses. "So we're not crazy, just polyamorous."
"Like that? Don't you want to talk about it?"
"What's more to say," he said closing the laptop and putting it on the coffee table. "Luce, it has a name and what we just read fits like a glove. Do you want to be in a polyamorous relationship with me as long as we're both consenting to it?"
The blunt question left him gaping for a bit. He hadn't though it to be so easy. 1 hour of scrolling couldn't have provided a solution. But yet again, they page did talk about them, it seemed. It shocked him the forward approach Rhyshad taken on it and was even more surprised by his question. But then a warm and hesitant realisation took hold, more and more. "If things go that way with her, of course."
"We would need to be forthcoming, of course. She saw us together, she knows we are in a relationship."
"Are you... giving me permission to date her?"
Lucien couldn't help feeling like his heart skipped a beat. He had never really embraced the idea of it being possible, of really sharing that kind of relationship with Feyre, let alone without losing Rhysand in the process. It felt like a dream. And yet his boyfriend was there, with a calm face and happy eyes, looking at him with joy and not jealousy. "Not really permission because you are your own person. We are not really opening the relationship, we are... sharing the love. You've pined after her for months. You've developed a genuine attachment to her, and you'll be happy with her and me. I think I'm crushing, too, and I think you understand the implications here. I think I'd like dating her as well, but I need time to adjust to this new thing."
Lucien smiled widely and pulled in Rhys for a kiss. He felt a the weird sensation in his chest, like something warm and fuzzy settling there in his heart, right next to Rhys. And butterflies in his stomach at the idea of seeing Feyre, flirting with Feyre, maybe kissing her, like he was kissing Rhys. And at the same time loving him, kissing him and dating him.
His boyfriend took his hands between his own and broke the kiss. "You'll be honest with her and tell her that we will still be a couple, and that you will not pull favourite between us. In the meantime, I'll try and read more about this. I want to dig a bit deeper... and I think I'll mention it to my therapist, if you agree."
He nodded vehemently. He had almost given that for granted. "Of course. If it makes you uncomfortable, I'll avoid telling you how things go, if instead you want to know, I'll have you tell me how much you want to know."
"Right now, I'd want to know everything because I know just how much you're good at courting," laughed Rhys, ruffling his hair. "But I'll let you know. Right now I'm so happy seeing you happy. and if I could participate to this happiness, I would like to. But I want to understand what I feel better. I want to be my own person in this."
"I understand and I think you should take as much time as you wish."
"But not too much, this took less than I thought and we could make it to the gym," added Rhys before standing up abruptly and pulling Lucien after him. The redhead groaned "I don't want to go to the gym!"
"You have to if you want to woo Feyre."
"Put me down!" he yelped when Rhys loaded him on his shoulders like a sack of potatoes. "Rhys, I'm serious, if you bump me- OUCH. No, not the stairs!"
---
As usual:
I'm 7 (8?) year late to the fandom? Yes. Do I care? Not really.
People reading this gives me an insane amount of joy. Thank you so much.
Inspired by A Completely Inappropriate Series of Events by @illyrianrhys and The Lucky Ones by @bibutterflies
In honour of the reading gang: @shinevanserra @medusas-pubez @mich0731 @jaxes101 @sanniesworld07 and @irithiadourden
Everyone in this fic is Out of Character and I don't regret it.
I didn't disappear, I was at a work even for 4 days and before that I needed a lot o prep. Sorry for the delay!
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acourtofthought · 5 months ago
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I sit with this thought, trying to imagine what it would mean if SJM released an Elriel book. It’s the kind of idea that, on the surface, feels ridiculous, like one of those what-if daydreams you have while half-distracted, waiting for something else to happen. But then, there’s that persistent nagging voice in the back of your head, the one that says, what if? 
What if she really did give us Elriel, those two characters who feel like they belong to someone else’s story? There’s something about the whole idea that doesn’t sit right, like the sound of someone trying too hard to fix what wasn’t broken. I can’t picture them as endgame, I just can’t.
And yet, there’s this curiosity, isn’t there? How many of us, Elucien shippers, would actually read it? Not because we wanted to, but because we had to, just to see how it all fits together. The narrative, the characters, the inevitable shift.
Would we read it out of loyalty to the story or would we read it out of defiance, waiting to see if something could ever make sense of this tangled mess? Because deep down, part of me wonders if there’s something a little masochistic about it, something in all of us that needs the confirmation, the closure, the full weight of seeing something we fought against, seeing it come to life in print. So, no, I don’t know if I’d read it with excitement or with dread, but I think I’d still open the pages, if only to prove a point.
What about you?
I think I'd probably read it because Sarah is usually pretty good at explaining why a couple is supposed to end up together but she would have to overhaul both Elain and Az's characters and the way they act around one another (they read like two 15 year olds who don't understand how real relationships work when on page together and the spin-offs are New Adult featuring a 500+ year old guy and a 24/25 year old girl). Which, if that's the direction she wants to go, it's her prerogative. It's just that she would be erasing the personalities she's given them thus far in order to make them believable for an endgame pairing. Elain would suddenly have to be a character who is not as gentle and kind as we believed, but someone who embraces the idea of torture and revenge. She would suddenly like the darkness and shadows, not sunshine and nature and light. She would have to never revert to the Elain of the past, the one who could charm anyone with a few smiles and who loved balls and parties in order to stay by Az's side since he likes his space and alone time. Or, Az would suddenly need to morph into the life of the party or someone who enjoyed the company of others so he could stand by Elain's side as she flitted around chatting to everyone.
Though I would read the Elain and Az book, I would feel that it was a missed opportunity for Sarah to really open up the ACOTAR world to us. Nearly every single main character staying in the NC, forever having weekly family dinners together because they've literally made no real relationships outside those they found because of Rhys and / or Feyre, every single main character reporting to Rhys and Feyre as their High Lord and High Lady? Nesta did make her own friends in Emerie and Gwyn but if E/riel end up together than it's clear that moving forward the family dinners would only feature Feyre, Elain, Nesta, Rhys, Cassian, Az, Amren, and Mor with the only outsider being Varian. The exact same group we've seen since ACOWAR with no growth to be found no infusion of new personalities. I mean, Elain has been friends with the wraiths for multiple books yet they still haven't shown up to any gatherings. But Gwynriel? Elucien? Family dinners would be a blend of old and new. Gwyn and Az, Elain and Lucien, then the OGs of the IC. With Elain and Lucien we'd have strong connections to places outside the NC. We'd have friendships outside those in the NC. We'd have places that Nesta and Feyre would be welcome outside the NC. We'd have Sarah showing us that variety can make the most beautiful of families, where different people from different walks of life can come together instead of needing every golden brown haired Archeron ending up with a dark haired tattooed Illyrian warrior.
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separatist-apologist · 11 months ago
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Hey MB<3 I just keep rereading your fics over and over and they hit everytime (like seriously they itch every scratch in my brain), but just wondering, do u have any elucien fics on your tbr rn, or recent ones that you recommend? I'm mostly looking for canon compliant bc that is crack to me but im not too picky, just looking for recs!
I ANSWERED THE WRONG ASK god kill me right now
You're so sweet. Sorry it took me so long to write this- I wanted to put together a good mix. I hope you like them- these are just one's I've read, there are more on @elucienweekofficials list of multi-chapter fics set in canon, too!
This is long so I put it beneath a cut. I tried to mix on-going fics with completed fics and not recommend the same ones I always do. If anyone finds this list helpful, be better than me and leave a review
I Believe The Word You're Looking For Is Friends by @kingofsummer93
Elain Archeron and Lucien Vanserra are haunted by ghosts of their past, unable to move forward, unsure where they belong.
Together they come to an agreement. He'll teach her everything he knows about Prythian. He'll take her anywhere she wants to go.
In return, maybe she can just stop slapping him so much.
All You Have Is Your Fire by @clockwork-ashes
'I can hear your heart beating through the stone.' For the briefest of moments, Lucien wondered if his mate would know exactly when his heart’s steady rhythm came to a sudden stop.
Elain goes to the Autumn Court demanding an audience with the High Lord to save the mate she can barely stand to be in the same room with. She ends up having to stay much longer than she bargained for.
What If I Told You I'm Back by climbingmountains
Come one, come all, it's happening again…Elain and Azriel have been married for ten years. Koschei is defeated, their family is at peace. And if she feels a hollow ache of something every once in a while, that’s just the price one pays for love and duty.
Until she comes home one day to the news that her husband has a mating bond of his own.
OR: I listened to nothing but The Tortured Poets Department for over a month and had a lot of angst to release.
Mockingbird by @avabrynne
After Lucien reluctantly agrees to meet with Eris, he’s shocked when his brother reveals his biggest secret: he has eight-year-old twin daughters. Unwilling to entrust them to anyone else and with Beron's gaze on him more intense than ever, Eris has Lucien swear to protect the girls and take them with him.
When it becomes clear they can’t stay in the human lands even when glamoured to look human, Lucien turns to the Night Court. While it’s easier to handle outbursts of young magic there, Lucien needs help. Enter Elain, who bonded quickly with the twins after their arrival. On top of everything else, Lucien and Elain start to navigate their bond while also finding out a few more secrets, like who Lucien’s actual father is. It's an Autumn and Day Court family drama Elucien and ErisxOC fic!
ACOWAR (Eluciens edition) by @crazy-ache
One moment. All it takes is one singular moment to change the trajectory of fate. Following the events of Hybern, everything changes when Lucien instinctively grabs his mate—Elain Archeron—and brings her back to the Spring Court with Feyre and Tamlin.
In the midst of war and ruin, Elain and Lucien will have to face the bond that connects them together if they hope to survive the unintended consequences. To do so, they’ll have to prevail through games of deceit, powerful forces of magic, and deadly enemies. And hope their hearts survive the journey.
A retelling of A Court of Wings and Ruin (ACOWAR) and a Canon Divergent AU.
A Court of Ash and Sunlight by aturner1205
“I know you’d rather not get help from me. I know you’ve rejected our mating bond and I’ve accepted that. But I still want to make sure you’re safe.”
Her heart twisted in its cage, filling her whole body with icy tears that would not spill.
Tell him. He deserves to know the truth. Tell him.
And because this time the voice inside was hers, because it was strong and clear and right, she did.
“I haven’t rejected the mating bond with you, Lucien,” she said quietly, her chest pounding so loud she could hardly hear the words. “But I think I damaged it, because—because I’ve never felt it.”
The Scenic Route by @bonecarversbestie
Elain grows discontent with her role in the Night Court as she grapples with grief for her human life and powers that she does not fully understand. One evening she accidentally winnows to Lucien's doorstep and he agrees to take her back to Velaris via the scenic route.
Can I Be Close To You by @temperedink
Elain and Lucien have been feeling out their tentative new relationship for a while, and Elain is getting antsy about the slow pace she's set for them. But maybe it's time to take things to the next level.
Set a few years post-ACOSF.
Oceans Apart (Never) by angryramen
Living in the Day-Court with her mate seemed like a damning at first. But slowly Elain started to enjoy Lucien’s company. They conversed together in the Day-Court gardens and slowly became friends. He even promised to charter a ship to take her to the continent, somewhere she’d always wanted to go. But when the time comes to say goodbye…
The Heirs of Fall and Flame by arosebetweenthorns
Eris Vanserra has always been a complicated male. Born as the first son to a tyrant of a High Lord, he was raised on cruelty, learning never to reveal weaknesses. But as Eris' allegiances to his father's court are questioned, his loyalties forming with those across borders, he realises enemies in his own court - especially his father - may be too difficult for him to keep at bay, especially when he inadvertently sets his father's sights onto his youngest brother. Then there's Rhysand's Inner Circle to contend with - one particular shadowsinger that Eris can't seem to avoid... but does he even want to? --- Lucien Vanserra always thought his suffering at the Autumn Court's hands was behind him. But when his father shows a vested interest in him years after banishing him, it's clear he will have to fight to keep the fragile peace he's built himself. All Lucien wants is to be with Elain and begin a life of his own, but when Elain's life is threatened by his father, Lucien learns just how much he has to learn before life can truly begin.
This is a direct continuation of the events of ACOSF. Joint POV of Eris and Lucien.
A Court of Breaking by @aldbooks
A year after the events of A Breaking, Elain feels a tug on the bond and realizes her estranged mate is in danger. Lucien, now returned to the Night Court, wonders if he might have been too hasty in his decision to leave, and if there might still be a chance for him with his mate
Summer Heat by @zenkindoflove
Lucien nodded his head, looking for any cue that he was dismissed. “Got it. Keep everyone in line and try not to make an ass of myself in front of my mate. I’ll see what I can do.”
Summer Court is hosting the Summer Solstice Summit and the Night Court is sending their best emissaries to attend. It will be Elain's first time mingling in another court, and it's a good thing she has an expert guiding her: the mate she's been ignoring for the last two years.
Meanwhile, Eris has been sent to the summit to spy on Summer's developments. What he doesn't anticipate is entangling in a steamy, forbidden romance.
Post-ACOSF, Elucien, Eris x OC, Multi-chapter.
Healer In The Night by @infinitefolklore
Lucien has been away on the continent on a mission. No one has heard from him in over two months. Elain is worried. On a dark and stromy night, he shows up bloody on her doorstep. Elain nurses him back to health.
The Luck Of The Draw by @sad-scarred-sassy
Elain Archeron is determined to end her unwanted mating bond with Lucien Vanserra. She has resigned herself to a loveless life, convinced she will never be able to experience true love without the fabricated weight of an assigned mate.
Her plans take a sharp turn when her mate arrives with a proposition to accompany him on a mission to a foreign court. When no one else believes her capable of succeeding Elain decides to prove to herself and others that she is not as hopeless as everyone else thought.
Only this will mean she will have to face him, and with that all that she has sworn off, battling between not knowing where the mating bond's influence ends and where her true feelings begin.
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loonylooly · 2 years ago
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at this point i'm wondering what sarah is thinking when writing her love interests, like ok it's clear she finds them hot but like....are they good people
Rhys:
UTM lap dance shenanigans
throwing Feyre into danger constantly (Weaver, destroying cauldron, getting the book from Adriata, etc etc)
Still not doing jack shit about wing clippings in Illyria?? Emerie is right there, Rhysand, go enforce your damn laws
Insulting his wife's sister constantly
Almost killed his wife's sister cause she dared give her important medical information
Locked Lucien (MY BOY!!) in the house of wind
Locked Nesta in the house of wind
Didn't give Mor any warning that time he made her face her abusers and she cried i think (ngl i forgot most of it)
Ignoring Hewn City even tho...Kier is like the only bad guy we've seen from there?? Surely there's decent people in Hewn City, don't gotta make everyone suffer
Nesta windhaven kidnapping intervention so she stops spending Rhys' money (if it was really about her own sake, they would've put a stop to it much earlier)
Seemingly alienates everyone in Feyre's life that could and would stand up to Rhys for Feyre's sake. Lucien? Nah, shoo. Nesta? Nah, shoo. Weird thought but Tarquin? Yeah, makes her steal his book.
And last but DEFINITELY not least; demon baby wife death
HE COULD'VE TOLD FEYRE... OR ATLEAST NOT THREATENED TO KILL HER SISTER FOR TELLING HER WHEN HE HOULD'VE TOLD HER IN THE FIRST PLACE??
THERE'S PROBABLY MORE BUT MOVING ON
Cassian:
Barely ever stands up for Nesta in the IC
Aids in kidnapping Nesta to Windhaven so she stops spending whysand's money
Laughs at Nesta when she falls down the stairs
Aids in punishing Nesta for daring to tell Feyre important medical info
Constantly going agaisnt Nesta's wishes and trying to "save her" when she doesn't want him to
That one time Azriel asked Nesta if Cass had pushed her down the stairs...Like are we gonna ignore that?? Personally I'd have a quarter life crisis if my closest friend, who is like my sibling and has known me most of our lives, seriously entertained the idea that i would physically assault the girl I like
general aggressiveness all of ACOSF
aids in bulldozing Nesta's apartment
Rowan goddamn Whitehorn (Who I've yet to see people bashing him somehow,,, HoF rowan was like if ACOSF cassian had a horrific murder baby
Left his pregnant mate alone during a war cause he wanted to prove himself....like..idk man if i had the choice between war and taking care of my pregnant wife i'd pick the wife (did he know she was pregnant? i've kind of forgotten by now)
Rowan's kid would've been hundreds of years older than Aelin.....just think abt that
Literally everything he did to Aelin during training in HoF
Their argument where he PUNCHED HER IN THE FACE
Threatened to whip Aelin...I repeat....Threatened to whip Aelin, an ex-slave....
Told Aelin it'd be better if she died 10 years ago (unprovoked?? bitch you met her like 2 weeks ago just cause she's getting on your nerves doesn't mean you gotta wish DEATH upon her)
Literally was relieved to find out she was only 19 because if she was a few years older she could've been THE CHILD OF HIS BEST FRIEND.
No issue with marrying the cousin of his best friend's child....Imagine if he hadn't met Aelin first.. If he'd met Aedion first, Aelin would've always been the relative of his friend's son to him
FOR THE RECORD i hate all of the SJM age gaps but rowan and aelin's specifically irks me because Aelin LITERALLY CALLS HIM OLD throughout the WHOLE SERIES
Literally tells Aelin he doesn't care about what she's been through and that she is nothing to him after she confronts him for leaving her
Puts Luca in danger by sticking him on to a frozen lake with a monster inside where he'll DIE if Aelin can't save him
Funnily enough, some of the only seemingly decent person guys in SJM 1. Are completely forgotten about in the books or 2. SJM had to make them violently unlikeable
Like we've got:
Tarquin, seemed like a pretty good guy, rightfully pissed that the IC stole his family heirloom, shows up like twice in the books (LET HIM COME BACK SARAH I LOVE HIM)
Tamlin, was pretty decent in book 1, was made violently unlikeable in book 2 onwards
Chaol, very strong morals, generally a good person, loves his wife, made violently unlikeable and boring in late CoM, HoF, and QoS (ToD is one of my favorite books in the series, will praise ToD till the day I die, my boy EARNED his own book)
Aedion, seemed like a good person, strong morals, spent years trading his dignity for the sake of Terrasen, loved his cousin above all else, made violently unlikable in KoA (even tho I think he was justified in being angry about it, i'd be SO pissed)
Sartaq, good guy, strong morals, Nesryn's chapters were some of my favorites in ToD, Sartaq is one of my favorite SJM love interests, i'll never forgive author lady for forgetting about him in KoA (tho i guess she forgot about everyone from ToD? Yrene and Chaol are the only important ones, she barely even mentions Nesryn even though Nesryn's BEEN an integral part of the gang since QoS, giving her the Suki from ATLA treatment)
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lanitalay · 2 years ago
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Before I Say Goodnight
Chapter 4
a/n: sorry this is a bit late, Halloweekend got very busy. Enjoy!!
Other chapters
Warnings: none
Word count: 2k
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“I suggest someone else take her back, she did not have a good time during the flight” Cassian says and flashes you a mischievous grin. His face drops when he sees the far away look in your eyes and the wet streaks on your cheeks “seriously though, can someone winnow her?” “I need to speak with Lucien so I can take her, but I have a few meetings until later in the afternoon” she looks to Mor “do you mind giving her a tour of the house and finding her a room in the meantime?” Mor adjusts her hair and says “of course, we can have a little girls day and get to know each other a bit. I’ll fill you in on all of our juicy gossip” she winks at you. You wipe your tears away and put on a poor excuse of a smile “that sounds great, I love to gossip”. You laugh, kind of, trying to ignore the pang in your chest. Memories of long gossip sessions with friends flashing through your mind. At coffee shops, during phone calls, at sleep-overs before you fall asleep. Amren gets up from her chair “I assume this meeting is over. I’ll see if I can find something in my personal library” and walks out. “Meeting adjourned '' Rhysand announces and the group stands to go their own ways. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, y/n” Feyre smiles and walks out of the room. Mor is waiting for you by the doorway “Come on, girl, there’s a lot to see”. 
“I think this should be your room” Mor opens the door and lets you walk in first. The tour had been… a lot to take in. The house is huge and it’s beautiful but it has about a hundred floors and a million rooms. When you step through the door, you’re not shocked to see a beautifully decorated room with an incredible view to match. Velaris, the city of starlight, Mor had told you. “It’s close to the stairs, has its own bathing room and if you pull this back” she goes towards the curtains and reveals a glass door that blends in perfectly with the wall of windows “a balcony! I think no one has claimed this one because it is a little on the smaller side but if all goes well you’ll be on your way home soon” she smiles as you look around. This room is twice the size of my room back home. The bed looks divine, it is made with expensive looking linens, it has about ten decorative pillows that take up half of the mattress. You sit on it and lay back. Good god, I’m never leaving this bed. “This is the most extravagant bed and room I’ve ever seen, let alone stayed in” months of traveling on a budget had gotten you accustomed to thin mattresses at crowded hostels or questionable spare bedrooms from online listings. This was luxury. From what you had gathered last night, a High Lord is someone akin to a king and by the looks of this “house” Rhysand has the taste and wallet of true royalty. “I can’t disagree, it is beautiful” she sits next to you “so… I was serious about the gossip. There are some things you might want to know about the whole dynamic within the Court of Dreams” you can’t help the genuine smile that comes on “tell me everything”. “I knew there was something about you that I liked” she giggles “ok so since you’ve met Lucien I guess we can start with him and Elain. This is crazy, the poor male has terrible luck. Anyways Elain is Feyre’s sister and quick backstory, Feyre and her sisters were humans but for different reasons got turned Fae a while back. Elain and Nesta got dunked in the Cauldron and that turned them. The thing is that all of us were there when it happened and when Elain came out of the Cauldron, the mating bond snapped between her and Lucien-” Oh this is good. “Mating bond?” “Oh right, a mating bond is something that happens between two people destined by the Mother, as I was saying Lucien just says it in front of everyone and Elain is there like totally in shock. Flash forward to a few weeks later her mortal fiance hates Fae and wants nothing to do with her now and she wants nothing to do with Lucien and then Azriel kind of likes Elain now” she goes on to tell you about how Feyre and Rhysand met and Cassian and Nesta. You noticed that she didn’t tell you anything about her own drama but chose to not acknowledge it. It was comforting in a way that these magical beings had personal dramas and gossiped about it like you and your friends did “those stories are wild, Mor” she nods “we’ve been alive so long that we really have to work hard to keep things interesting” you snort and there's a knock on the door. “I’m sorry to interrupt but y/n, I’m ready to go when you are” Feyre says and you quickly get up from where you’ve made yourself comfortable on the bed. “Yeah, let’s go. Thanks for everything Mor” you quickly hug her and go towards Feyre. “How are we getting there?” you ask, not sure what to expect  “I’ll winnow us, you’ll see” you walk until you reach the terrace where you had landed with Cassian earlier and look at her wearily “this place is warded against winnowing so I’ll fly us out until we pass the wards and then I’ll winnow to the Manor”. As she speaks, wings appear on her back and she holds out her hands for you “it’ll be quick. I promise” you gulp. 
Feyre did not lie when she said it would be quick but left out that it would feel like the world is slipping from your grasp. You feel sick as she puts you down. You rest your hands on your knees in an attempt to steady yourself. “It takes a bit of getting used to” she lets you take a breath and you say “It beats going through TSA”. Feyre nods and when you’ve gathered yourself begins the short walk to the manor. 
Packing up your belongings was incredibly underwhelming. You had folded the tunic you’d been using as pajamas and the dress Vassa had given you and stuffed it in your bag. Feyre and Lucien had gone to the library to talk about whatever it was they had to discuss. You had a feeling they were talking about you and if you posed a threat of some kind, feeling that the offer of staying in the House of Wind came from the Court of Dreams wanting to keep a close eye on you. You zip everything up and descend the stairs to find your hosts and thank them for everything. Walking to the kitchen you find Jurian making dinner “they really take advantage of your talents here”. He turns from where he is chopping up produce and lets out a chuckle “it’s the price I pay for pissing Vassa off”. “What did you do?” you ask but before he can answer a lovely feminine voice interjects “he was being an idiot as usual” Jurian rolls his eyes but does not defend himself. “On that note,” you try to diffuse the tension “I’ll be staying at the Night Court while they research how to get me back home, thank you so much for everything. I think I would’ve been dead days ago if it weren’t for you” Vassa pouts “I’ll be sad to see you go, it was such a relief to have some feminine energy around here, but I understand” she walks over and hugs you tightly “please come say goodbye once you’ve figured it all out” you hug her back. Jurian stays by his vegetables as he says “you have to eat dinner here though, I’m making enough for the four of us and Lucien brought pie for dessert”. Your chest warms. He really got the pie. “In that case Feyre, will have to wait” you beam. 
After dinner and dessert with the exiles Feyre lets you know she’ll be waiting outside while you say your goodbyes. You hug Vassa and kiss Jurian on the cheek. Lucien offers to walk you to the door and you take the chance to say “thank you for the pie, it was delicious”. He offers you a half smile “you’ve had a rough few days, it’s the least I can do”. “Will you come visit?” you ask hoping the answer is yes. Everyone in the Night Court seems nice enough but Lucien, Jurian and Vassa have a special place in your heart. “I’m due to go there for a meeting in a few weeks. You’re always welcome to use your room here as well” nodding you hug him and without letting go say “I’m nervous”. He hugs you back “you’re in good hands, the House of Wind is safer and you’ll have everything you need”. You let go and walk out the door. 
Feyre walks with you until you reach your room “Mor showed you the kitchen and the common areas?” you walk in and set your bag down. “Yes, she was very thorough with her tour” you felt heavy. Maybe it was the flying and winnowing or saying goodbye or the weight of your reality crashing down on you. “Alright, try to sleep, if you need anything ask the house and if there’s an emergency you can wake up Azriel, his room is across the hall”. You remember him from earlier, tall, wings and devastatingly handsome. Historically, you had never figured out how to act around attractive men and during the meeting it was incredibly difficult to focus on retelling your story. “Thank you, Feyre” she goes to walk out and says “I’ll let you know tomorrow when the priestesses begin their research so you can join them if you like”. 
Wait, did she say ask the house if I need anything? You go to ask her but she’s gone. “House? Can I have water?” you ask to see if you had heard correctly. You are shocked when you see a tray with a jug of water and a glass appear on the bedside table. That is the best thing I’ve ever seen. You do your night routine: you bathe, brush your teeth and hair and put on your tunic. You pull the covers from the bed and get cozy. The house turns off the lights and the curtains are open, letting through the shine of the city and the stars. During the day it’s easier to ignore the ever growing helplessness. It feels like you’re drowning in it. Trapped in a glass coffin in between space and time. You feel your throat get tighter and your chest feels hollow and- Breathe. In. Out. In. Out. Count the stars, do something. Your mind screams. One, two, three, four, this isn’t working. You get an idea. Getting out of bed and walking towards your bag you pull out your phone. You haven’t used it since… well, since everything. It should be charged. Your heart skips when the screen lights up and you scroll to your photos as quickly as you can. Forty-five percent. You see a picture of your dog that your mom had sent you on your last day on Earth and tears well up. It hurts but it brings you comfort to know that they have each other. Committing the picture to memory, you shut it off and get in bed again. They have each other. They are not alone. Eventually sleep takes over. Mercifully, you have no dreams.
The house had closed the curtains after you fell asleep. When you woke up to a dark room you almost thought you had slept through an entire day. Sensing you had awoken, the curtains flew open and you see the sun above the city. It looks like it’s still early. You put on your dress and go have breakfast in the dining room. Azriel is the only one there. “Good morning” he greets. You fiddle with your dress, suddenly aware of the dirt that’s staining the hem and the way it falls off your shoulder. “Good morning”.
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rosanna-writer · 10 months ago
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time won't fly (it's like i'm paralyzed by it) (6/?)
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Summary: Every day, Rhysand wakes up next to Amarantha in her bed Under the Mountain. A prisoner, a weapon, a High Lord on a leash. He's been down there so long, it's starting to feel like time doesn't matter. Until one day, it doesn't. Feyre's death sends Rhysand back in time, waking up on the same day - over and over. Now, Rhysand must discover how to break the time loop, save his mate, and keep his sanity intact. A "round robin" style fanfiction with different authors. This work is meant to be read from beginning to end, but each chapter is written by a different author with their own spin on the time loop prompt. Warnings: canon-typical sexual violence, canon-typical violence, temporary character death Rating: Explicit
We've had one short Feyre death interlude, yes. But what about SECOND short Feyre death interlude?
I had so much fun giggling with the rest of @feysand-hivemind over silly ways to kill Feyre amid all the actual plot brainstorming we did! Much love to this group of unhinged goofball creative geniuses <3
Read on AO3 or find the chapter under the cut! The tumblr masterlist for the fic is here.
Watching Lucien bring Feyre back to the manor hadn't been enough to ease Rhys's mind. Even as he'd hunted the faeries who'd nearly gotten their hands on her—and enjoyed it—he'd worried.
He slipped back into the manor to check on her. And call it intuition, a gut feeling, or an impossible reason he might sense things about her that Rhys refused to even consider, but Feyre was awake. And creeping down the stairs.
Cloaking himself in shadow, he followed her, footfalls silent. She made her way down to the kitchen, completely alone with all the servants still out celebrating Calanmai. There were still a few hours left until sunrise, and Rhys was sure the denizens of the Spring Court were fully intent on wringing every last bit of merriment out of their very last Fire Night aboveground.
He couldn't blame them. He wanted to savor these rare few hours of freedom, too.
It had been so long since he'd seen the stars.
But more importantly, he wanted to see for himself that Feyre got back to bed safe and sound. Blissfully unaware of the revelry outside, with its undercurrent of frantic desperation, she was busy gobbling down half a loaf of bread.
And an apple. And a lemon tart.
Mother above, the girl could eat.
She grabbed a cookie next and practically inhaled it, so quickly that she began to cough. The coughs became strange gurgling noises. Feyre's face began to turn blue.
Before Rhys could react, she'd keeled over. Her breathing stopped. He stood there in shock, unsure what to make of the fact that Feyre had just choked on a cookie and died.
Right after the mermaid, too. Perhaps everything in the Spring Court was trying to kill her.
The thought made his insides twist as the world faded to darkness and time reset again.
He followed the same steps as before; the sequence of events was becoming painfully familiar. Rhys wondered how long it would be before he could follow them without even having to think about it.
No—he wouldn't let it come to that. He'd break them out of this loop well before that happened. He had to.
After the last disaster with the cookie, he followed her back to the kitchen after Calanmai again. And because Rhysand wasn't in the business of making the same mistakes twice, when she bit into the cookie, he called her name.
Rhys knew their encounter had frightened her, even if he had saved her from the picts. He did the only logical thing and used magic to distort his voice.
Feyre flinched. And coughed again. The whole thing ended again much the way it had in the last loop, and for the life of him, Rhys couldn't decide if seeing Feyre killed by a cookie—not even once but twice —was a message or merely some sort of divine punishment.
At least the mermaid had only deigned to attack once.
He tried again, misting the cookie before Feyre could get her hands on it. She merely choked on the lemon tart instead.
Casting a glamour to conceal the food just resulted in a head injury when Feyre fell off the step stool she'd climbed, utterly determined to find something to eat.
In the next loop, he barred the kitchen door. She managed to injure herself attempting to pry it open.
The High Lord of the Night Court accepted that he'd been bested by a cookie.
The world remade itself again, and Rhys didn't attempt to dissuade her from the kitchen. He kept his distance. She lived.
Perhaps that was the lesson behind all of this—that Feyre was better off without him getting too close. Instead, he set to work hunting the picts, and as Tamlin bit Feyre's neck somewhere in the distance, Rhys tried not to sink further into despair.
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