#the weird double negative there

[fideidefenswhore]

did a partial reread (it’s been many, many years....im ancient...it’s been 84 years.gif) of tcp last night and it was...an experience.

[shitty-proendo-blackout-posts]

[greensaplinggrace]

it is just calling out misogyny. calling baghra abusive and not darkling because you want to fuck him.

i imagine this is about this post, in which case i want to be very clear here about a great many things. first of all, you are factually incorrect, and misconstruing the situation. it is not just calling out misogyny, because there would have to be misogyny occurring in the first place. which there was not.

second of all, i want to go over what exactly you did that fundamentally undermined your argument. what you were doing in that post is called a red herring. it is the act - in a debate or intellectual discussion - of diverting focus away from the original topic with an irrelevant one. what you are bringing to the table is a bias; it is the misconception that one must always be discussing what you believe is the more serious topic when addressing other issues - and it is the equivalent of, say, bringing up men's rights on posts about feminism.

to argue that there is a double standard occurring, one would have to have sufficient evidence that the template used to judge one side is being completely discarded or changed when judging the other. in that case, the biggest argument to be made in this fandom about double standards is the double standard of watering down the female loyalists while holding the male revolutionary accountable to an entirely radical degree.

but that's beside the point. because the post referenced didn't come close to showing any type of double standard in any direction.

now, i want to be very clear here: a woman being brought up or critiqued in any space does not equate an automatic attempt at misogyny. that one cannot discuss a woman's complete actions without also - by social consensus - bringing up a man to divert attention away from her, is more damaging in that regard than the initial discussion about the woman to begin with.

as such, what you are also bringing to the table is another bias - an assumption. that anyone critiquing a woman when there is a man right beside her is automatically ignoring his crimes. and not only that, but they are ignoring his crimes due to sexual intent.

this assumption often arises if one believes their own worldview is superior to anyone else's. and if one ignores how the delineation of focus and critique in fandom spaces operates. furthermore, this is rooted in the belief that moral pandering must be done at all times to remain acceptable in social (fandom, in this case) spaces. which i have already mentioned before as being incredibly harmful and engaging in a black and white worldview that simply does not comport with reality. people do not operate in boxes, and they do not need to give all of their focus all of the time to the things you have issues with. if they are so pressing to you, you should discuss them yourself.

in fact, this brings me to a recent post i made about cross-tagging, which seems strangely relevant to the way you and many others operate within fandom - and believe others should operate as well. and that is this: there is an obscene amount of inflammatory hate posts cross-tagged with irrelevant topics. they're always tagged with the groups or fandom spaces assumed to be similarly minded just because the media or character they engage with are more acceptable and "pure".

i've seen anti darkling posts tagged with genyalina. completely unrelated in any capacity to the subject of the main post. i've seen even more hate posts tagged with six of crows, when their only subject matter was shadow and bone. do you know why this is? it's because these people (when they are not simply trying to attract attention) believe wholeheartedly that their views on morality are homogenous with the whole, and that if one hates this amoral character in the ways they do, they must also like the morally acceptable things as well, and condemn others similarly. it is an automatic slide into 'us vs them' based on a shared impression of ethical ideology.

this is how people with little real capacity to decipher nuance end up getting their wires crossed about the complexity of literary discussion and personal interest in fandom. and how this somehow correlates to one's inherent goodness.

which is the long way of saying that a person does not have to raise every other issue when discussing one subject. they do not have to always mention the darkling when they talk about baghra - and they do not have to (as i am well acquainted with this fandom's obsession with female purity and gender essentialism) automatically support every female character spat out of those books just to make the people incapable of media comprehension and basic critical analysis feel better. they are not beholden to you, or your egocentric worldview of a homogenous social sphere. you are not the authority on operating in fandom spaces, and you are not - believe it or not - the authority on acceptable behavior in fandom spaces.

[toytulini]

wheres that post about how its hard to have like a fucking depression spiral or whatever while knitting bc lemme tell u im sitting here fighting back tears while actively crocheting and its not fucking working

[rogers-attic]

was watching american dad tonight and GEORGE FUCKING LOWE did a voice in it 😱😱😱

[sundimus]

me when the universe keeps hurting me: the world is SPINNING and i am ALIVE and everything will fall into PLACE and everything will be OKAY and everything will be OKAY and everything will be OKAY and

[brw]

I do think icebeast is like. Not something with potential in the current era but Bobby’s nebulous age makes things so weird like the peak was those of comics where they’re always going on dates together and disappearing when the lights go out when Bobby was ~16 and Hank was ~18 but they really seem to want to make Bobby younger retroactively (and probably Hank a little older too, like compared to jean and Scott). It makes shipping them frustrating

That's a fair enough concern anon, honestly Bobby definitely has one of the strangest ages in comics, like he's not quite as bizarre as whatever Franklin and Val have going on or Kitty and Jubilee but he definitely has a weird one... like again I do think IceBeast is definitely in the text and I think writers would really benefit for admitting Bobby had a crush on him. Also, I think that while Hank is maybe not as unattainable as literal angel Warren, he still is very much so a private crush / fantasy from the best friend thing, and the fact that he's the oldest of the 5. But yeah it is kind of weird how Bobby has shifted from being a kind of childish 16 year old to being more like 14 or maybe even 13 with how fans and writers and artists talk about and depict him in those early days and recontextualises that dynamic into being more one-sided than it might have initially been.

[monsterbisexual]

i hate how i feel doing or not doing certain stuff for/because of the pain + fatigue since im a fat person :///

[p2ii]

hes so unserious

[kiwibirb1]

I was typing out WHY TF DOES AUTOCORECT KEEP CHANGING OUT TO PUT sorry that was uncalled for

Anyway I was typing out a tag and one of the auto options idk wtf their called one of the auto options was "idk how people do it" and my brain immediately filled in "being neurotypical". Like what

[wonderofasunrise]

God, THIS.

He’s always two seconds from saying a slur every time she raises her voice and even when she has valid concerns about something (which is often) all he does is outright dismiss her and he never even tries to listen. But of course it means he’s into her being mean, how romantic /s

Pretty much all eps that focus on their relationship go like this: Tom is being a total knob to B’Elanna and she rightfully calls him out on it —> he doubles down, acts like her reaction is uncalled for, and of course spouts drivel about how being Klingon makes her all mean and hostile 🙄🖕🏼 —> she ends up being the one making compromises and trying to appease him while he never has to do the hard work —> everything is fine and dandy again because obviously that’s what love’s all about <3 *vom*

Honestly, it’s such a common theme when it comes to B’Elanna and men who think they know better than she does and therefore feel entitled to dismiss her problems without even trying to listen. Yet, somehow she’s always the one who ends up making compromises ro appease them. See also: the way Chakotay treats her in my beloathed “Extreme Risk” *throws punches at air*

TL;DR: B’Elanna Torres daughter of Miral you deserve so much better 😔

wild when people characterize tom as being super into b’elanna’s “meanness” as if he isn’t two seconds from saying a slur every time she raises her voice a little

[novy2sirius]

MERCURY HOUSE CORE ©novy2sirius

trigger warning: mental health issues, pedophilia, killing, physical health issues ☘️

this is just a random post abt things ppl with these placements could experience ☘️

these r only abt isolated placements so take it with a grain of salt bc the whole chart matters ☘️

a lot of these r experiences i’ve heard from my friends and ppl who’ve purchased readings from me directly ☘️

☿ mercury in 1h core

being diagnosed with more mental illnesses than u can count, being very intelligent which leads u to be anxious just by existing bc of all ur knowledge, saying things u don’t mean cuz u were angry, being told u have a youthful face, knowing a bunch of random facts abt things and telling ppl and them asking why tf u know that or care, hyper-fixating on things u can’t control, getting internet hate by simply existing, getting dmed sexual stuff by random weird dudes trying to prey on u (especially when ur younger), getting nauseous bc ur anxiety is so bad (especially before school), having sexy hands, skipping school to be on ur phone all day and do nothing, asking way too many questions bc of ur curiosity abt everything and annoying ppl (especially as a kid), giving ur opinion when no one asked for it, being told u could be a good rapper/singer, being rly good at flirting bc of ur charm, cussing a lot

☿ mercury in 2h core

being obsessed with mukbang/eating videos and then making urself rly hungry and being frustrated bc u can’t have the food they’re eating in the video, valuing ur own opinions more than others, not answering texts or calls bc ur too lazy to but then liking those same ppls posts on instagram, saying “um” too much or having a lot of pauses in between words bc ur a slow thinker, talking to ur toys as a kid when u were lonely, getting all ur food recipes from pinterest, buying online gift cards for ppl instead of putting effort into an actual gift/on the flip side if ur a more creative person putting a lot of thought into gifts, being good at making things from scratch, being more wealthy in online games than in real life, being obsessed w the papa’s food games on cool math as a kid, holding grudges against ppl who kill u on roblox, liking scents that smell like food or scents that make u smell rich/boujee, always making money, making money online

☿ mercury in 3h core

double texting bc u have sm to say and will forget abt it if u don’t type it immediately, being able to get lots of followers on social media, being gossiped abt online, being a huge reader, enjoying hearing abt other ppls drama but not wanting to be in any, having a child-like energy (this can be in a positive or negative way depending on what vibration ur at in life), saying childish things in arguments when ur at a lower vibration (example: meh meh meh :p), drama following u wherever u go, aging well, being obsessed with sims, not believing things unless there’s very good reasoning to back them up, being able to communicate well, being a talented writer, forming all ur opinions from ur older siblings (if u have any), math or literature being ur favorite subject, being a good driver, enjoying traveling but not for too long bc u get tired quickly of it, being charming af, being witty and quickly thinking of good jokes

☿ mercury in 4h core

posting all ur feelings on social media or going thru that emo phase in middle school where u would post those sad lyric vids on ur snapchat, ur family gossiping abt u a lot and u overhearing it in the next room, having a super low pain tolerance, enjoying watching self care vids, getting baby fever after seeing tiktoks of cute babies, being a rly good person to come to if someone needs a comfort person, living in an rv/camper at some point in ur life, telling ur mom everything and her giving u advice abt certain situations but then u don’t listen and she ends up being right abt the whole thing, coming to ur mom for advice on everything in general, ur mom being more childish than u, being able to write stories that readers rly emotionally relate to a lot, ur mom having videos of u still up on her facebook from when u were little that still haunt u to this day

☿ mercury in 5h core

being creative as hell, being a natural performer, having a fun childlike energy, being a huge risk taker and thrill seeker, being a talented actor, being rly good at video games and possibly becoming famous from playing them, living for the drama but not wanting to be a part of it, downloading tinder and not knowing y u don’t just delete it, being sassy, being told ur trying to hard to be the main character but u literally r the main character and can’t help that, not having ur first love until ur an adult and only experiencing puppy love in ur youth, going to a bunch of concerts, being turned on by wattpad stories and feeling like a whore bc of it, flirting w ppl online and then being scared to say anything to them in person when u see each other, being a good driver

☿ mercury in 6h core

ppl saying u come off super innocent (even if ur not), constantly doing things for others even when they don’t give the same energy in return, being obsessed with improving ur health or with videos online abt being healthy/fit, feeling awful before going to school bc it gives u horrible anxiety and makes u feel like ur gonna puke, thinking ur gonna get a stroke every time u have a normal headache (and being a hypochondriac in general), not functioning without consistency in ur life, having an entire pinterest board of cute animals, being good with animals, being obsessed w ur hygiene and feeling nasty when u don’t shower everyday, weirdly loving medical shows such as greys anatomy, having a lot of stomach issues

☿ mercury in 7h core

convincing ppl to do things with ur charm, wanting to tell ppl something and be honest with them but being too scared bc u don’t want them to hate u and r constantly afraid u’ll hurt them, copying ur romantic partners slang/ur partners copying urs, meeting lovers online, dating or marrying gemini/virgo placements, having age gaps in ur relationships, getting into a lot of conflicts online, ur ex partner/ex best friends posting abt u and subbing u (not saying ur name directly but talking abt u) online after u have a fallout, flirting with ppl on club penguin or roblox when u were younger, changing ur opinions easily based on what ur partner or close friends think, dating ppl when ur too young to even drive, posting a lot abt ur relationship online

☿ mercury in 8h core

analyzing ppl well and understanding them before anyone else does, ppl randomly telling u their deepest darkest secrets when u didn’t even ask, being interested in the way ppls minds work which leads u to become obsessed w books abt psychology/astrology/tarot/etc, starting to masturbate from a rly young age that’s almost concerning, having a lot of mental health issues bc of ur childhood trauma, using dark humor as a way to cope with ur trauma, not realizing how much trauma u’ve went thru until someone verbally tells u that u’ve been thru a lot (usually a therapist), being a tomboy as a kid, being obsessed with true crime, being told ur mysterious, saying out of pocket shit that has high shock value, being stalked online

☿ mercury in 9h core

having a more optimistic mindset than everyone around u, enjoying traveling a lot, wanting to leave ur hometown as soon as possible, driving when traveling instead of taking a plane cuz u don’t wanna pay for the flight, majoring in communications or something involving technology or literature, having an interest in other cultures more than ur own, coming off as intelligent bc of the way u talk and ur mannerisms, being told that u could be a good lawyer from a young age, being a good interviewer, knowing multiple languages, having logical ethics, being a comedian, being an amazing story teller

☿ mercury in 10h core

trying to keep ur daily life private and ppl still getting in ur business, being able to influence the public easily bc they seem to care a lot abt what u say, being famous on social media, being a famous singer, rumors being spread abt u to the public, having a talent for teaching others, having goals that u set as a kid that u feel u must fulfill, having a career involving cars, having a career involving technology, having a career involving writing/literature, being seen as someone who’s intelligent (especially in ur workplace), having dad humor, coming off as a know it all (10h is associated with experts and mercury is the thinking/the mind), being known for ur humor and how funny u r, playing online games that involve having a job such as papa’s freezeria

☿ mercury in 11h core

having random bursts of creative ideas and doing crazy stuff like writing an entire movie and then literally forgetting abt it the next day, ur best friends being ur siblings, having the most random thought processes, being able to make friends easily, having lots of online friends, being clumsy as hell, having a fan page/editing page when u were younger, being known as “the weird kid” in school (this doesn’t mean it’s always in a bad way tho it can mean in a unique/fun way), being popular online, having unique mannerisms, having a unique voice/unique speech patterns, being a good rapper, being dragged into online drama, cussing a lot, saying random things out of nowhere like ice bear from we bare bears, having a lot of ideas that r unique bc u think outside of the box, having unique perceptions, constantly changing ur mind abt things

☿ mercury in 12h core

speaking/writing things into existence with minimal effort, being obsessed with the feeling of nostalgia and making urself feel it then regretting it bc it hurts, ppl interrupting u and talking over u a lot, ppl ignoring what ur saying and making u feel like a ghost, having a huge interest in spiritual things, manipulating and lying a lot when at a lower vibration, being bullied (especially as a kid/in school), feeling lonely even when ur literally socializing or at a social function, having an astrology account, having more online friends than friend’s in person, daydreaming a lot in social settings (and in general), gaslighting ppl when at a lower vibration, being able to speak to the dead thru ur dreams, hearing ppl talking when ur half asleep, sleep walking, being sensitive to things ppl say but trying to hide it, healing ppl through ur words, hiding ur true thoughts abt someone, hiding ur true intentions, having strong emotional intelligence when at a high vibration, easily figuring out what someone’s feeling, being able to do rly good impressions

[skyenish]

Mr. Loverman | Scarabia animatic 🐍☀️

——

Something something happy pride month

(Ramble under the cut)

Since I’m drawing Jamil and Kalim to like every romance song in existence, of course I had to draw them to mr. Lovernan; its only natural! And this song fits them so well too… the ways that Kalim talks to Jamil are so sickenly sweet and loving, they make Jamil wish he was gone. I think it’s so perfect to have that one voiceline where Kalim says Jamil’s name, but not with his usual trust or love or kindness, but rather with disbelief, fear, and confusion. That way the song can have a double meaning for them! Kalim’s sweet words make Jamil sick, but when Jamil’s plans fell apart and Kalim called out for him, confused and refusing to believe that his closest companion would betray him, it still makes Jamil’s stomach churn. I bet that sometimes Jamil wishes Kalim could just shut up.

But Jamil still cares about Kalim, still remembers when they were friends. Their relationship is complex, and though he hates it, I think he still does love and care deeply about Kalim, but all those feelings are just in a very weird and difficult place. I absolutely adore that double meaning! The ways in which Kalim talks to Jamil makes Jamil feel a lot of things, negative, positive, and he hates it. But “wishing i were gone” and “running on and on” can apply to both his negative feelings of desperation, hatred, loathing and disgust, and also those feelings that deep inside make him wish their situations were different, that things didn’t end up like this. Jamil lies a lot, also to himself, and all his feelings are so tangled and stuck (dude is super emotionally constipated and needs therapy fr). I LOVE the character development Jamil and Kalim got in book 6 and 7, because they’re slowly making their way towards building a healthier, mutual relationship, and I’m so happy for them! I will be eagerly awaiting the day their relationship is fixed, and they’re happy with themselves, eachother, and life

As always, please remember that these are just MY interpretations of and takes on these characters! If you disagree or want to share your own interpretations, thats valid, and please do share! I love to read analysises and rambles! :)

——

Drawing has been really difficult again; im busy with school and I can’t get myself motivated to draw. Social Media has also been bumming me out. I’m really sensitive, and there’s been a lot of negativity on my fyps and timelines, which has just killed my mood. Good news also though- the twst anime finally got a release date??! I have been waiting for this for YEARS, and I can’t wait to see our boys animated and for the fandom to grow and for new merch! There’ll be so much more cool fanart, new character discussions and analysises, new people who get to experience twst for the first time!

Kalim is such a cutie, he’s so fun to draw! (Until suddenly my hands decide they don’t know how to draw him anymore).

(GUYS HAVE YOU SEEN THE UPCOMING CATER CARD??? IM NOT OKAY HE LOOKS SO GOOD AFHAGSGDHJ)

[astrologyobservationsss]

Random Observations

#4 synastry

5H OVERLAYS

SUN ☌ AC

SUN ASPECTING MARS

URANUS ☌/△/✱ PERSONAL PLANETS

PLUTO ASPECTING INNER PLANETS/POINTS

🍨 PEOPLE’S PERSONAL PLANETS IN YOUR 5H tell me if I’m wrong but, in my experience you can't stop smiling. They bring you joy and with just a look you start smiling (I guess this won’t happen if your 5H or the planets falling in you 5th are afflicted). I have some examples with two friends. With one, their Moon is falling in my 5th and with the other it’s Venus. One night, after meeting with some friends, we spend some time the three of us and literally we where kids laughing and making each other smile. Both of them produce me that feeling, but the second one in a more romantic way (even that I feel attracted by the Moon)

🍨 PEOPLE WITH SUN CONJUNCT YOUR ASCENDANT you look alike, and people can view similarities between you. For example, my friend follows an instagramer (christylevich) that has her Sun precisely conjunct my Ascendant. She always send me posts of her, telling me the resemblance. I also have this one with my sister -in a wider orb 2º-, same again. One more example could be my cousins Sun conjunct a friends of mine Ascendant. The other day I told her, WOW, you remind me of my cousin. And then I realize about the aspect. But in this case, my friend has her Mars conjunct my cousin Sun, and their suns are in opposition, so there's more added to it

I just noticed that all this examples happen in Virgo 🧐

🍨 SUN ASPECTING MARS I experienced this aspect several times, with hard and soft ones, and I can say that it’s SO attractive. The last example that made me want to write about this aspect was the trine. I have double whammy with tight orb with one of my work colleagues. In air (Libra-Aquarius) and earth (Virgo-Capricorn) signs. Apart from other good aspects that we share -trying to isolate this one- I would point out that we like how the other makes things. Since the beginning I was physically attracted to him. And he told me that he likes how I work. There is attraction. Although he shown me signs of that, the trine is more gentle than the hard aspects. With the square and opposition double whammy I noticed that the contrary can happen. It always depends on the natal chart of each individual and other aspects BUT, there is a feeling of “I don’t understand how you do things”. This happened to me with a flatmate. Even I accept her and she is nice, sometimes I have this feeling of, "why would you do that?"… (not proud of it)

🍨 URANUS ☌/△/✱ PERSONAL PLANETS LOVE-THESE-ASPECTS! Every person that I had this aspect with was amazing. Since the beginning I had 0 shame about being weird. In other words, I could be myself without restraining. But if I had to choose I would choose the SUN-URANUS as the best one. Being yourself is funny. There is no judgment between you. You feel alive and want to be with that person. It’s similar to the other aspects, but because there's different energies involved it subtly changes. With the VENUS-URANUS there’s that freedom-feeling that it’s comfortable, and in my experience, the Venus person will feel the attraction straight away

🍨 YOUR PLUTO ASPECTING THEIR INNER PLANETS/POINTS you can’t express this feeling with words. It's just something that happens with both of you. I have the VENUS-PLUTO double whammy—☌ to my Pluto and ✱ my Venus—with my best friend and it’s an aspect that creates glue. Is the level of deep understanding, there’s no secrets between you. Also, the conjunction is on the 4H, creating that level of openness to the private life. We also have MOON ☌ PLUTO and IC, again producing a deep level of emotional support and trust. On the other side Pluto negatively aspecting your inner planets/points, can be manipulating, but that’s another story, long enough to make a new post. What I can say is that it always depends on the maturity of the Pluto person, and how this planet is aspected in their natal chart. I always found Venus-Pluto aspects in the natal chart as a softener of that “toxic” intensity

Hope u liked it! :) And as always, I love to hear from your experience, so we both learn. Let your comment if you have something to share <3

MORE POSTS

© Astrologyobservationsss

[whatonearthisgoingon]

Gravity Falls animatics

If anyone is interested, and because of the rise in Gravity Falls content, here's some fun stuff made by the Gravity Falls Fandom from YT and Tumblr:

Canonish Angst and issues: - "Take a Slice - Gravity Falls Animation" by achromaticEgoist on YT, @achromaticegoist on Tumblr. - Topic: Weirdmagedon. - "Achilles Come Down | Gravity Falls animatic" by nogiiarts yt on YT. - Topic: Ford's research/past and the Pines family - (It's back!) A Sadness Runs Through Him - a Gravity Falls PMV" by Kinseis on YT, @kinseis on Tumblr - Topic: An au representation of the relationship between Ford and Dipper, with Bill's negative influence - "DR. GASTER // BOOK OF BILL PMV" by mistxmood on YT, @mistxmood on Tumblr - Topic: Bill's time in theraprism vs. how the pines are doing after Weirdmagedon, a brief summary of deals and Weirdmagedon, and Ford finding the Book of Bill. - "Sleep Walk | Gravity falls animatic" by Hoodedjelly on YT, @hoodedjelly on Tumblr. - Topic: Young Ford and Bill, the abuse from Bill to Ford. - "Sleepwalk | Gravity Falls Animatic" by InkcapAnimation on YT, - Topic: Young Ford, Fiddleford, and Bill; the abuse from Bill to Ford. - "Real as Ever" by @heyitsspiders on Tumblr. - Topic: The abuse and control of Ford from Bill. - "DRUNK (Gravity Falls Animation)" by marineflames on YT - Topic: Bill's possession of Ford and Dipper. - "Devil's Train (Gravity Falls Animatic)" by YannyDo on YT. - Topic: Bill introducing himself to Ford. - "CONFRONTATION Bill Cipher and Ford Animation (CW FLASHING LIGHTS)" by marineflames on YT. - Topic: The internal battle of control between Ford and Bill, and the abuse from Bill to Ford. - "THE FINE PRINT / Billford / Gravity Falls / Animatic" by Plantain_Xd on YT. - Topic: The deal between Bill and Ford, the abuse from Bill to Ford, and Weirdmagedon. - "Bill's Unused Villain Song - It's Gonna Get Weird" sung by Neil Cicierega. - Topic: Demo song written by Neil Cicierega to be used as Bill's villain song. Would've been such by Alex Hirsch, but that was robbed from us.

The Mystery Trio and Bill: - "Double life animation meme // Gravity Falls [I KNOW U HEARD THE RUMORS]" by KimukoDoesALot on YT. - Topic: A quick summary of all the on screen possessions we see, along with the Still Bill Theory. - "Gravity Falls | Colors" by Typhord on YT, art by @kiki-kit on Tumblr. - Topic: A history of the two Stans, Ford's research, and Stanley's effort to get Ford back. - "BEZOS | Gravity Falls Animation Meme | cw bright colors, flashing, strong language" by Possumbreath on YT. - Topic: Fiddleford Mcgucket and his Cult: The Society of the Blind Eye. - "The Gun | Gravity Falls Animatic/ Storyboard (LOUD AND FLASHING)" by Clever Reference on YT, @call-me-clevy on Tumblr. - Topic: Fiddleford and Ford fight over the memory gun. - "shine a light (reprise) || gravity falls" by hummise on YT, @hummise on Tumblr. - Topic: Bill convincing Fiddleford to use the memory gun. - "The World's Greatest Actor - GF Animatic" by tendebill_exe on YT. - Topic: Stan's life. - "Drift Away || Gravity Falls Animatic" by CosmicCrossing on YT, @shima-draws on Tumblr. - Topic: Stan and Ford's relationship slowly drifting apart, then the reunion.

Bill behavior and past: - "BILL CIPER REANIMATED | Gravity Falls [Flashing Lights]" by R0V1 on YT. - Topic: A reanimation of Bill Cipher's "death scene" in Gravity Falls. - "The mind electric // gravity falls // bill cipher // billford animation" by H3MI on YT. - Topic: Bill using his talents of manipulation to gain sympathy from the AXOLOTL, his interference in the Pines family's lives, and his failure at Weirdmagedon. - "September in Euclydia" by L Void on YT - Topic: Bill reflecting on the destruction of Euclydia. - "how bill cypher destroyed his realm - gravity falls comic dub" by Count Julius VO on YT, art by SHEOL on X - Topic: Bill's childhood and the destruction of his dimension - "THERE I AM AGAIN! (Bill cipher animation)" by CandySwirl on YT. - Topic: Bill's appearances in the Gravity Falls world. - "THE ACCIDENT - GRAVITY FALLS / THE BOOK OF BILL AMV" by PeteyTheParrot on YT, @peteytheparrot on Tumblr. - Topic: Bill being moved to Theraprism, and the destruction of his dimension. - "AXOLOTL - A Gravity Falls Fan Song" by summer bloom on YT, @sumrbloom on Tumblr - Topic: Fanmade song discussing Bill and the AXOLOTL - "GOOD LUCK BABE | Gravity Falls Animation" by nntsu on YT, @nntsu on Tumblr (pretty sure). - Topic: Bill's relationship with the AXOLOTL, as he ignored the AXOLOTL's advice of not dominating Earth, and glimpses at Bill's past. - "rockabye billy - gravity falls BoB animation" by ashana on YT. - Topic: Bill's childhood, and the accidental destruction of his dimension and parents. - "Uncanny ( Bill Cipher Short AMV)" by Jøzlyn Moon on YT, @jozlyn-moon on Tumblr. - Topic: Bill regretting his deals and decisions in Theraprism. - "BRUTUS | Gravity Falls Animation" by achromaticEgoist on YT, @achromaticegoist on Tumblr. - Topic: A complicated au; details in the video's description. (I liked the video)

Billford: - "GETTING OVER YOU - Book of Bill animatic" by Scoopy Sketches on YT. - Topic: Ford and Bill's past relationship, and the toxicity, manipulation, and obsession from Bill's end. - "Sky Fall // animation // billford // gravity falls" by H3MI on YT. - Topic: Ford and Bill's past relationship and Weirdmagedon. - "A human’s touch // gravity falls" by H3MI on YT. - Topic: A quick show of Ford and Bill's relationship in the past, versus during Weirdmagedon. - "HUMAN’S TOUCH- A GRAVITY FALLS ANIMATIC" by M0CH4 CUP on YT. - Topic: A showing of Bill and Ford's toxic relationship, where Bill was using Ford for the portal, the events of Weirdmagedon, and Bill's time in Theraprism.. - "RULER OF MY HEART | Gravity Falls Animation" by ORXA on YT, @orxinus on Tumblr - Topic: The toxicity and obsession of Bill and Ford's relationship. - "THE RED MEANS 'I LOVE YOU' || Gravity Falls Bill Cipher Animatic" by R0V1 on YT. - Topic: A showing of Bill's sadistic tendencies, and his physical abuse and obsession of Ford. - "THE TORTURE TANGO | BILLFORD ANIMATIC" by vikzo on YT - Topic: Bill's torture of Ford in the Fearamid during Weirdmagedon. - "Just the two of us // Billford // Gravity falls animation" by I.V.Y on YT. - Topic: The negative progression of Bill and Ford's relationship. - "BILLFORD -every breath you take- animatic" by Gloom_arts on YT. - Topic: Bill's obsession with Ford throughout his life. - "My Goodbye - BillFord Animatic" by Gallows on YT. - Topic: Bill and Ford arguing about their past relationship during Weirdmagedon - "Stanford Pines - No Children" by clarisimart on YT. - Topic: Ford regretting his relationship with Bill. - "PORK SODA - BILLFORD [FW]" by Eldoodlez on YT. - Topic: The beginning of Bill and Ford's relationship, then Ford learning the truth. - "[GRAVITY FALLS] BILL CIPHER & STANFORD PINES – GOOD LUCK, BABE! | ANIMATIC." by Punkiinx_neon on YT, @punkiinx-neon on Tumblr. - Topic: Bill singing his apologies to Ford in Weirdmagedon, and Ford being annoyed at Bill.

Comment if you think of more big ones I should add (try to avoid song repeating tho, I already did it too much in this T^T)! I only have Youtube and Tumblr tho, so any artists on other medias, I will not add.

[yaseraphine]

2024, the year I lost my crown.

Pluto in aquarius / Sun / Ego / Leo stellium / Ego death / Karma

I will say it loudly and proudly : In 2024, I entered my flop era (and it set me free)

This post will sum up the major lessons I learned this year through the prism of astrology.

INTRODUCTION - This post is a post I was looking forward to sharing for a while. 2024 seemed to have been a crazy year for a lot of people. Mine could be summed up by “emotional release” or the release of a karmic emotional cycle as well as connecting with my inner child. This year was charged with deep epiphanies about my childhood, which I realized I romanticized and erased key moments from my memory. Realizations came in waves always accompanied with the identification of intense deep seated insecurities and fears that stemmed from my childhood and the way I was nurtured. All of those intense and hidden emotions bubbling up to the surface together made this year really emotionnally charged with negative emotions. This eventually unwillingly forced me to neglect superficial aspects of life, such as appearance and charisma. I was slow, insecure, tired all the time, felt like sh*t all the time, lost drive. You could say that, basically, in chronically online terms, In 2024, I just entered my flop era.

This made me realize the extent of our society's obsession with glowing up, being the best version of ourselves at all times, pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone. Entering our so-called “bad bitch” era, focusing on self-care, being the best, having people admiring us, standing out, being that b, making people do a double take on us,etc... Most of our life is spent relentlessly  trying to be unique, appearing at the top of our game. We always aspire and desire to appear and seem , but we never just are. 

Capitalism has its ways of trapping us into a vicious cycle of superficial constant change and improvement. Like it creates new problems to solve for the mere goal of selling a new product to us, it creates a weird transactional and selfish sense of self, where we almost aspire to be alienated from the community and stand out. 

I decided to share this post as a reminder, in the sea of “how to glow up in 2025” videos and posts, that, sometimes, divine timing has its ways and it prevents us from shining the way we want to. Not every year is a year to glow up, you cannot be at the top of your game all the time. Like during the reign of a Queen or King, your empire will have an apogee, but also a decline. Your power and influence over your empire will always fluctuate, and you will only get probably one period of apogee, followed by a pretty intense empire decline. Despite going through all of this, something will always remain and that is faith. The faith you have in yourself, in the future, maybe even in God or a Higher Power. The faith that is deep inside yourself and that guides and helps you to push through even if you’re at your lowest.

This issue behind this obsession with “glowing up”, and all the external validation that comes with it and avoiding “flopping” at all costs, is what led me to go insane and completely give up this year.

Start of college : a beautifully humbling experience

-> from the top grader to a “mid” grader, an average student

-> highly political place 

-> Politicians and rulers : ruled by Leo BUT political parties, independent parties, ideology : ruled by Aquarius

-> I started to not only take interest in my own endeavors but also the country’s / humanity’s condition

-> I attended riots and protests multiple times, even during exams seasons

-> I assisted to GM’s hosted by students there to protect students’ rights but also for Gaza (GMs = General Meetings)

-> I read books about feminism, learned about communism and just politics in general

-> Unlearned a lot of myths surrounding the working class, rape culture, cultural appropriation, ..

-> Made new friends quite different from the ones I had in High school > anarchists, feminists, really woke people.

Why did all those changes occur ? 

SR Chart of the year 2023-24 : North Node in the 11th  house > letting go of ego and individuality to embrace community

Lilith in the 9th house transit : with all this new knowledge, I literally felt like my brain was being rewired. All the old thought patterns and life limiting beliefs I have been clinging to all chattered, bits per bits. Of course, I started that shadow work way before I got that Transit HOWEVER this transit did boost the process of getting rid of those limiting beliefs.

Gemini rising > my 7th house sign, my shadow, was my rising that year. I have to say the year prior to this year prepared me REALLY well to deal with it since, that year, I became friends and hung out with a bunch of people with gemini stelliums (i genuinely don't know how I survived tbh)

North node return -> events that pushed me to get out of my comfort zone

Chiron in the 9th house transit : my natural ability and talent to think abstractly got tested by this transit. The more theory I learned, the foggier my mind got. I kind of felt like the more times passed, the dumber I got. Which, I know, sounds crazy. But my comfort zone of having philosophical thoughts, disconnecting from my direct environment, this sagittarian hyper-independence (and ego..) became uncomfortable to embody and I felt a sense of loss every time I was ought to have abstract ideas and see the bigger picture. My natural intellectual talents “decreased” and I had no choice but to ask for help and interact with other students to understand certain concepts (so becoming the student even though it’s not comfortable to me). Along with my North node return in the 3rd house (my natal placement), this pushed me to trust other people’s knowledge and experience and learn from them. To show up daily, interact with people from all walks of life and not think to myself before doing so that “there is no point anyway to talk to them it’s useless/ a waste of time / we’re too different” or whatever bullshit excuses my ego would create to prevent myself from socialising

"Let them eat cake"

My obsessive desire to be perfect and to handle everything by myself got too far. I wanted to look my best every single day, but, by the second semester I just couldn't keep up. My timetable was heavier, my classes less interesting and even harder. But, what truly pushed me, or more so forced me to change, was my final exams results of the first semester. In high school, I did not have to study much to excel. To be a top grader, better than everyone else was easy for me, it was a routine. I was never surprised by my grades because I knew I topped as usual. However, going with this mentality/ belief for those exams was what slapped me right back to reality. My grades were bad. When I saw them, my heart shrinked, I was completely shocked. I did not expect much to be fair, but I thought it was going to be okay. Oh boy, it clearly WASN’T. And what made it worse was the people around me, who did not seem to take school as seriously, who consistently skipped classes, who cheated and lied for homework. These people, these people that I consistently judged as immoral, those people that I despised so much , THOSE, they got better grades than me. This made me go CRAZY. I cried for days on end, I couldn’t go to classes because of how badly I felt. This was the final straw for me : what is the point of being such a straight, invested person who came to classes even when I was sick, who always looked clean and hydrated. A perfect student with a perfect attitude. An independent student who helped her classmates. A perfect student who gets exploited by a system where cheaters and liars pass just as well, if not better, and get complimented as much. I realized how much pent up rage I had inside of me. I wasn’t just sad or disappointed, I was deeply disgusted. 

Leo stellium, Sun in Cancer conjunct Saturn, Pluto and Chiron in the first house and 9th house south node : unrealistic standards, lack mindset, low self-confidence, strong ego , scared of being bad at something, of being the worst, self-loathing, “there is no point in doing that anyway” , “i am not like them anyway there’s no need for me to go to this event” : 

As someone with a Leo stellium, I never realized how strict I was to myself. Only people around me could see it, but, because of how headstrong I am, I thought they just didn’t have enough standards. The thing is, I couldn’t see how perfect a lot of things in my life were because I was only fixated on what I lacked. I only focused on the defaults, the problems, the parts I wasn’t good enough in. And even the vocal and direct feedback of people wasn’t enough for me to believe I was just fine, maybe even great. And while I always focused on the parts I have failed in, I also had this unrealistic expectation that I needed to have a neutral, linear emotional life. In my head, it was like : I had a period/ period of emotional disturbances now I cannot have one again, or at least not as intense. It’s simply impossible. Now I used all my “jokers”, cards , I have no choice but to only go higher. This strange way of thinking was what made me only put positive/confident songs on my spotify playlists and avoid any songs that expressed “negative” emotions, outside of anger and rebellion. You could say it's a good thing in a way because I did my best to lift my head up. I knew how music affected my mood so I adapted my playlists accordingly. The thing is, whenever I was feeling anything other than confidence or anger, I did everything in my power to dismiss it. I obsessed over avoiding feeling low because in that state, no one will like me. People will see me in a vulnerable state and it’s too embarrassing. People have to admire me, compliment me, heck just like me at least. But if I’m not on top of my game, they will realize I am like them. I am part of the “plebs”. I have to be a queen, a princess, not a goddamn peasant! (really harsh wording, I know, but it felt like that looking back). I can’t. I just can’t. ... Unfortunately, trying to desesperately keep up with my reponsabilities as a Queen, not caring much for people as they were mere peasants who had nothing to do with me, is what led me right into my empire's decline.. Up in my fragile papermade castle, seating on my throne, I truly always felt so lonely...

The last straw  : getting rid of the lion’s mane

I shaved my head. Crazy but I did. By myself. A monday afternoon, 3 days before halloween. Right in the middle of the sinister season of the Scorpio : I shaved my head. I shaved my long, luscious and golden curly hair. This mane that held all those limiting beliefs and toxic standards. My hair was my signature look, one of the first things people noticed about me. One of the first things people complimented me about. “Look at those beautiful curly hair ! I wish I had hair like you!” “They look so healthy omg!”. All this external validation was like a drug to me, therefore, I never DARED to even trim it. Yeah. Looking back, I was crazy for that.

Sr for the year 2024-25 + Pluto in Capricorn last turn around : my experience

SR Chart 2024-25 : Virgo rising with the chart ruler Mercury in Leo in the 12th house.

Pretty gloomy and bleak period. I was feeling quite depressed to be fully honest. I started the new school year with every symptoms of depression, exept the su*c*dal thoughts. I was slow, my body was heavier yet I lost weight. I moved slower, thought slower, slept more, was always tired, taking a shower, doing the dishes, eating and every other simple daily task was a burden, harder than usual. My solar leonine energy, my vitality all disappeared without me realizing it. I had low self confidence, didn’t get ready in the morning, and stopped feeling any sense of pleasure. I was empty, crying on the train to my campus. The last time I felt like this, it was in 2018, I was 13, depressed and entering the darkest phase of my Dark Night of the Soul.

Guess what, I am Not A Robot

You've been acting awful tough lately

Smoking a lot of cigarettes lately

But inside you're just a little baby, oh

It's okay to say you've got a weak spot

You don't always have to be on top

Better to be hated than loved, loved, loved

For what you're not

You're vulnerable, you're vulnerable

You are not a robot

You're lovable, so lovable

But you're just troubled

Guess what? I'm not a robot, a robot

Guess what? I'm not a robot, a robot

Once again, I had no other way but to ask for help. I went to see a doctor after years of avoiding it. I confessed a lot of things to my mom with whom I always had/have a really distant and tense relationship. Our conversations were really eye opening for the both of us. I went to see a therapist, and I am still looking for one. I didn’t have enough energy to attend class (I live 1h15/1H30 away from my campus.. so my 8 am classes were awful, especially since not attending is a risk to failing in that subject.. I was in a really problematic period.) But, I met a friend, an Aquarius sun and rising student who helped me throughout all of this. She was the contrary of me in many ways : really social, open and relied on other people. easily opened up to others. She didn’t have those perfectionistic obsessive thoughts. She trusted people, had a bunch of friends, and didn't overthink every single one of her interactions. She quickly became the air that tempered down my fire, which was burning myself out. My ego was killing me and my body (symptoms of depression) was warning me. I couldn’t control these feelings. I hadn't felt that depressed in a while. Like the type of depression that makes you stare at the wall in the morning, struggling to get out of bed.I thought it was behind me. I thought I was better than this. I thought “yes other people have depressions and struggle on a daily basis because of it and that’s okay but me ? I am over it. I had one at the beginning of my teenagehood. Now it can’t happen again, at least not actual depression.” But no, unfortunately for me, It did indeed happen. This showed me I was vulnerable, like every human being. I wasn’t immune to failing, to lose, to being bad, to being average, to needing help. I was simply a human being. I wasn’t a superior entity, a god flying above the rest of humanity.  I was just like them. Was I considered a bit weird for liking astrology, tarot and for listening to kpop ? Was I considered a bit weird for having Halloween as my favourite holiday ? Was I a bit edgy and had a certain sensitivity to anything grotesque, deadly, macabre, taboo ? Yes, I was all of that. But I am still a human being. I am just like other people in many ways, and even if I have more quirks than the average person It shouldn’t stop me from socialising. I need people and people need me, and, honestly, that is totally fine. Connecting with others is beautiful. People are here to help each other and share their experiences. That is the most beautiful part of existence : everyday frivolous conversations with people, interacting with them, exchanging ideas, sharing our daily frustrations and struggles, laughing. All of that is the simplicity I never expected I needed so badly. On the quest of finding this truth, I went faraway in the abstract realm of ideas only to realize that this truth was right in front of me since the beginning.

Life really wasn't as complicated as I made it to be.

A song that sums up this overall energy

Fear and Loathing - MARINA : "I'm done with tryin' to have it all and endin' up with not much at all"

Marina called Fear and Loathing a turning point in her life, after which she stopped being a "bitter person" and began to work with new people and try new things, even though she wrote the song alone in her bedroom in London. She placed the track last on Electra Heart because she views it as a "letting go" song.

In this process of losing myself, I am gaining something precious and that is the construction of a true authentic self-confidence. Not one that is out of fear : out of fear of being perceived like a loser, a compulsive fear of being like my 12 year old self, a scared and terrified pre-teen who hated herself, from the way she looked to her personality and non-existent talents.

I am finally starting to cultivate something solid, something that comes from a deep sense of self. 

[Verse 1]

I've lived a lot of different lives

Been different people many times

I live my life in bitterness

And fill my heart with emptiness

And now I see, I see it for the first time

There is no crime in being kind

Not everyone is out to screw you over

Maybe, yeah just maybe they just wanna get to know ya

And now the time is here

Baby, you don't have to live your life in fear

And the sky is clear, is clear of fear

[Chorus]

Don't wanna live in fear and loathing

I wanna feel like I am floating

Instead of constantly exploding

In fear and loathing

Albums that accompanied me during this period

Traumazine - Megan Thee Stallion

Something to Give Each Other - Troye Sivan 

All year long, I was drawn to artists with an 8th house North Node. Lately, I’ve been drawn to slower, more sensual and jazzy songs, which isn’t something I listen to usually. Songs about intimacy, vulnerability.

-> both artists have a North Node in the 8th house, which is currently the energy I am encouraged to embody as it is the North Node of my solar return for the year 2024-25.

This north node is all about trust and intimacy, sharing oneself, the deepest parts of ourselves with others, sharing our resources, accepting loss and not compulsively clinging onto things, and possessions.

Just in the title of Troye Sivan’s album, this 8th house aspect is instantly identified : we have something to share, to give to others, to exchange with someone. It hints at an exclusive exchange between two people.

Something to Give Each Other hits especially now. Traumazine, it was more in February/March, which was the period I was starting to release things and started healing, feeling deeply angry and sad at the same. (around the astrological new year). Since September/October, especially now and for the next few months if not year, I have been feeling more like Something to Give Each Other. Now more than ever I am discovering the beauty of connecting with others, sharing my true self, throwing myself fully in the unknown nature of human relationships. All of those things , despite being a Pluto dominant and 8th houser, truly terrified me for years  even though I obsessively and terribly craved it at the same time.

This album is my something to give you - a kiss on a dancefloor, a date turned into a weekend, a crush, a winter, a summer. Party after party, after party after after party. Heartbreak, freedom. Community, sisterhood, friendship. All that.

— Sivan describing the album

At the end of the day, we all have something to give to someone, and to give each other.