#the way the onions were made were *chefs kiss* tho

[baby-prophet]

very fun watching the menu after making myself microwaved white castle cheeseburgers. the even poorer sadder mans cheeseburger... really immersive. tiny smally cheap cheeseburgers, a combination of both worlds...

[ha-hatdog]

daisuke kambe hcs

- what is it like to be dating daisuke kambe/domestic life with daisuke kambe

i hope you don't mind but i slapped two requests together because they were nearly similar. since i am making one post with two requests, i'll try to make this longer. i hope you enjoy this

requested by anon (i just turned my anon ask and i'll just go ahead and presume you want to be anon hehe sorry about that) : Hi, I saw your post. 😳 I just wanna say goodluck to your writing! and I'll be looking forward to them in the future. ❤ (Your anon asks aren't on btw. 😔) And for the request, it can be a headcanon or a short fic/scenario, whichever you like. :3 But can I please get soft/domestic Daisuke to his s/o (which is the reader)? Like, they're taking care of each other stuff. ❤👁👄👁

uwu thank you so much and i look forward to writing more stories for you

requested by @holdmejk : what it’s like to date daisuke ��

i wonder too how it would be like to date this rich man so here ya go

__

haru kato is the simple man, simple life

there is no way daisuke kambe can be considered the same. this is the very reason why haru hates the man with a burning passion

waking up with daisuke goes two ways - the normal soft wake up, or the after sex wake up

if you wake up normally, you will always find yourself on his chest, a hand over the small of your back and the other behind your head, pressing you close to him as if you were his leverage to the real world

you never get tired of seeing him peaceful and cute that you kiss him everywhere your lips can touch - his chest, his cheek, his nose, his forehead, but never his lips

daisuke loves waking up to your kisses but what really gets rid of his sleepiness is the annoyance he felt that you never kiss him on the lips

he will lift his head up from the pillow while holding your head and lean forward to capture your lips. no, he doesn't care about morning breath, he cares about your kisses

if you two had sex the night before, it's a different story because it's daisuke who always wakes up first this time around because you know, he tired the hell out of you

he runs his fingers through your matted tresses as the side of his head rested against his open palm, elbow proped up on his pillow

he loves how you look so happy and satisfied and peaceful. he admires your beauty silenty, a small smile on his lips

he'll try to go another round because he can't help himself when you look so enticing but you stop him because you were already so tired

you will drown in luxurious things. this daisuke kambe we are talking about. what did you expect?

you want it? you got it. you like it? you got it. you need it? you got it. your eyes looked at it a second too long? you got it

daisuke believes you deserve the best of the best so whatever you wanted, bam, something much better

flowers? you get a garden. chocolate? you get a factory. movies? you get a theater. cup noodles? you get a ramen shop or the actual cup noodles company. dress? you get your own clothing line that trumps over versace and gucci

oh you think you can stop daisuke from spoiling you just because you begged him and showed him your big doe eyes? he was tempted for sure but there is no way he'll be holding back, especially after seeing your big doe eyes (yup, that plan backfired)

one hard thing about dating a millionaire? you can't buy anything for him

you do not have the money to lavish him the same, and even if you did, it's stupid to assume daisuke can't afford the same things you plan on buying for him. maybe he'll buy something even better

so instead of spoiling him like he does to you, you buy him trinkets that remind you of him

daisuke has no clue as to why items could remind you of him but he still keeps everything you buy for him close to him like in his office so he can always see them

you bought daisuke a goofy looking bobble head and he put it on the dashboard of his super cool looking car and haru was like the hell is that

daisuke sped through the streets before haru could make a comment

daisuke trust you more than anyone. more than suzue, more than haru, more than himself, more than his credit card

that being said, you are the only one he allows to patch him up after a particularly rough day at work

he will literally drive all the way to your shared home while bleeding out, enter your shared room as more blood trailed his face and deadass say "Can you help me? My head is bleeding"

you scold him for being so reckless and for always giving you a heart attack whenever he comes home in that condition

he doesn't mind being lectured tho because he still gets to feel your soft touches and gets lots and lots of kisses from you

he doesn't get why you kiss his wounds after patching him up. like his wounds are dirty? it still hurts? what was the science behind it? he still won't get it even if you explain it to him but he'll take note for reference

when you get injured, you are obligated to tell daisuke that you are not severely hurt that he had to call the hospitals all around the world to come heal you

you had to snatch the phone from him at one point when he tried to contact professional surgeons from america after you scratched yourself from a bush

daisuke at least knows how to use the first aid kit and no matter how little your injury may be, he will always proceed with the basics because he's very worried about you (though his face doesn't show it), that your small wound would get infected, and then you'll be on your death bed saying your last words, and then he's kneeling on your grave -

you had no idea this is what goes on inside his head every time you get injured

he also kisses your wounds after patching them up. he still doesn't understand the reason as to why you and others do it, but he does it because you do it

daisuke doesn't allow you to move a muscle aftee he's done fixing your wounds. he acts as if you have a terminal disease and would check on you every five minutes when he's working at home and calls you every three minutes when doing police work (haru gets annoyed with that habit so you had a talk with him)

dates with daisuke is far from simple. you either go to the most expensive resorts or attractions in japan or you're going out of the country. yes, your dates are basically mini vacations

so that's the reason why whenever you two want to spend time together, you are in charge. you can't always go to malaysia and england every weekend. plausible when you're with daisuke but you're not having it

you try to make your dates as simple as it can be. like what regular couples would do like going to movies (he was irritated because he had to sit near other people because he only wants to be near you), hanging out in the mall ("No, Daisuke, don't you dare buy that Gucci bag for me, I just glanced at it - oh for fuck sake"), and eating food from stands (Daisuke was confused like where will you two sit so you can eat your food properly?)

you two went ice skating and you guided him as he wobbled on his skates. you never let go of him because the first time you let go of him so he can try to balance alone in the ice, he looked very worried and made grabby hands at you

he becomes better at skating after doing it so many times. you were a little jealous because he's better than you now

daisuke his whole life always had a professional chef make something for him and when he began dating you, he also began inviting other professional chefs to make something for you two

but as your relationship grew stronger, you began cooking for him and you made him feel so special and he couldn't react properly

sometimes he watches you cook and helps with the cutting (you stopped him when he cut himself), but most of the time he's at his office and you bring his food to him and he scolrs you because he wants to eat properly with you ay the dining table

bringing food to his office is a no no. eating together at the dining table and sharing stories together is a yes yes

you don't know if the food you make for him is good or bad to be honest because he always has a deadpan face and if it is bad he won't tell because he'll hurt your precious little feelings but he'll be blunt as hell if it was another person

don't even wish that daisuke will cook for you. don't get him wrong tho, he really wants to but he's been pampered a little too much that he can't distinguish onion from garlic. he just thinks garlic is an elderly onion lmao

so yeah, daisuke cannot cook

but he likes cleaning the dishes with you because he can spray you with water and he'll hear your giggles. you always break many plates when you clean dishes and always drenched in water after your little fight

having the same authority with his AI. you rarely use the AI unless absolutely necessary and you can communicate with daisuke through it. you always mess with daisuke and you'll say something to the AI like "dial haru" and AI will go like "contacting haru kato" daisuke will go "cancel dial" and then AI says "cancelling contact" and you'll say "dial haru again" and the cycle goes on

late night walks are common for you two. when he comes home earlier than he originally does, he will insist you to take a walk on his private property and if he's feeling extra generous, he'll let you take him outside and to the park or something

you can take him to the convenience, the gas station, the prison - as long as he's with you, he's fine

stargazing is part of the late night walks. he'll point at a star and you'll say what constallesation that star was part of

"do you want that star"

"no daisuke"

"i can buy it"

"you are not buying a star"

daisuke : (꒪-꒪) ⇨(¬､¬)

he loves kissing you on the lips. your lips and kisses were just so addicting and sweet that he can't find another better place to kiss you

plus your blush is too adorable. he smirks whenever you get flustered. add a soft embrace to the mix, and his heart melts

daisuke will always open the door for you. in cars, in restaurants (he'll pull your chair for you too), in anywhere

he won't let you open a door as long he's there with you cause he's a simp for you

he won't care about any other person trying to enter an establishment after you enter. he'll let go of the door handle and won't even turn if he hears a loud thump behind him

you know what else he loves? hand holding. daisuke always holds your hand whenever you're outside and will only let go if absolutely necessary like going to the comfort room

he likes playing with your fingers while you love tracing the lines on his palm. you'll probably make a cheesy joke that you can see him marrying you in his future and he goes ( ºΔº )

"how do you know i was planning to marry you?" ( ºΔº ) "can you really read palms?"

you always massage each other because stress. when you massage him, he'll let out small mewls that just makes you go omg so cute but when he massages you - he will whip out the best of best stuff for massage

he will play relaxing music for you. you fall asleep whenever daisuke massages you because he's just so good with his hands

you know what else those hands are good for? touching your body in places that'll make you blush but he mostly especially likes cupping your butt because he thinks its so cute

you don't try to do the same because last time you did, you couldn't walk the day after. don't seduce daisuke if you're not prepared for a pounding

you like grocery shopping with daisuke. sure you can always order someone else to do it or you can make use of shopping as a time to bond with each other

you two work out together. daisuke is a boxer and learning that, you begged him to teach you to box but he didn't because what if he hurts you and instead, taught you how to workout and how to defend yourself

he wanted to test out if his self defense lessons were truly learned so he hired someone to pretend to steal something from you

he learned that his self defense lessons was fruitful because the man he hired came back with bruises and such

when daisuke admitted, he slept on the couch for an entire week

in your birthday, you woke up feeling nervous because it's your birthday - meaning daisuke must be up to some expensive shit

then you realized you're not in your bedroom. it was a completely different bedroom

you were scared honestly and you thought you were kidnapped until daisuke comes into your room wearing his beach wear and his shades while holding two coconuts with straws

"happy birthday. welcome to hawaii, my love"

HOW DID HE BRING YOU THERE WITHOUT WAKING YOU UP

you're just very tired the previous night after some fun activities with daisuke if you know what i mean wink wonk you wouldn't wake up no matter how many times you tried

suzue adores you because daisuke smiles more with you and you're best friends uwu so cuteeee

will always be your peace maker whenever you and daisuke fight. she ships you two. her ship cannot sink

suzue: "just hug it out now. hug it out - I SAID HUG DON'T MAKE OUT YOU TWO ARE GOING TOO FAST"

daisuke loves head pats. he wants them all the time. ruffle ruffle his hair. his eyes will close whenever you pat his head

he only wants you to pat his head. anybody else is a no no. maybe suzue but mostly just you

he lets you get all the groceries while he pushes the cart. he doesn't know the brands he sees on the shelves so he depends on you all the time

there's another reason he likes holding hands with you - he doesn't get lost. there was this time when he got lost because you let go of him and someone called you in the intercom and when you went there, you saw daisuke waiting for you with crossed arms and a balloon and its string around his wrist

the person at service said he was frowning the whole time you were gone and so they gave him a balloon but all he did was frown while playing with the balloon. he's mad because he got lost, you were gone, and you let go of his hand

you two are opposite of haru and his girlfriend in grocery shopping

you love it when his hair is down because he's so cute? can a man really be cute and hot at the same time?

the first you saw him with his hair down, you swooned and coddled him and since then, daisuke makes it his point to put his hair down more often now

taking baths together is just as great as massages. shower? you're not some commoner peasant. you use a very large bathtub

you relax with daisuke in the bathtub with bubbles and wine and sometimes he read you a poem from the poetry book he brings at times

you two always go to bathe together. but if you feel like you wanna bathe alone, daisuke will get all pouty aww and sulk aww

he will sit at the toilet seat and stare at you and when he does this, you can't hold yourself back anymore because he's too adorable and just let him join you with a sigh. he's with you in the bathtub in seconds

but if you don't, he'll leave the bathroom after a while and poke his head at the door, staring at you, as if saying this is your last chance and if you still don't allow him, there is a good chance you'll find him sulking on your bed while lying down, back facing you

just cuddle with him, he'll be fine

haru still doesn't believe daisuke got someone like you as his girlfriend because you're so kind and down to earth and you're dating this rich bastard like whaaaat

you try to make haru see the good qualities of daisuke and every single time you do, daisuke does something to piss him off

you made it your personal mission to experience the regular life of a human being without an unlimited balance

daisuke allows you to style his hair whenever you two sit on the couch. any hairstyles, any accessories, he's open so long your soft fingers are on his hair

you have always wanted a dog and begged daisuke for one but he did not relent, saying it was too much work and although it hurts to see you sad, he had to be strong

this is the only thing and time he said no to you and i'm pretty sure you heard haru scream in horror at the distance in disbelief

then one day you and him were walking down a street when a small puppy trotted up to you two wagging its tail and barking happily at you

you bent down and patted it, cooing and daisuke is wary of that small adorable pup. will it bite you? surely the pup has some common sense

you scooped the pup up and it licked your face and you were laughing and daisuke just has a sudden realization - who looked cuter? you or the puppy? or perhaps you made each other cuter?

daisuke rejected the puppy when you tried giving it to him but you forced it into his arms. daisuke and the pup kinda just stared at each other for a long time. you honestly thought you broke both of them until daisuke kissed the forehead of the puppy, hesitantly but softly

you were shooked (you swore you can hear haru screaming again)

daisuke couldn't help himself. something about the puppy just reminded him of you. it's those puppy eyes

"we need to find its owner, daisuke"

"no"

you told him he cannot buy the puppy because the owner must be worried sick

but it turned out it was a stray lil pup and you adopted her

now daisuke comes home to see you sleeping on the couch waiting for him with the pup in your arms. his heart melts every time

his small little family

for now

Daisuke Kambe let out an exhausted sigh as he parked his car in the garage. His hair was tousled, eyelids dropping, and jacket discarded on the passenger seat beside him. The case earlier has proven difficult than the previous ones he had taken. The criminal was harder to catch with his agility and athletic abilities, and was not easily persuaded when beckoned by cash. Not to mention his partner has been rebuking him the whole time, ranting about how justice workes and how money does not solve everything - basically, the usual. He was extremely fatigued, and all he wanted to do was wash up and go to bed with his beloved in his arms.

A tired smile broke his bland visage at the thought of you. The only reason he hasn't decided to spend the night at a hotel was because you weren't there. The faster he moves, the faster he can get to bed with you. Oh, he can't wait to see you and that little puppy of yours and his.

He exited the car, jacket draped over his shoulder. He sluggishly went to the front door and entered. As he delved further into his mansion, he was immediately greeted by a lovely sight. Your slumbering figure was laid out on the couch, the newly adopted puppy curling near your chest and resting with you. Warmth swaddled his heart and his eyes softened. All of a sudden, the exhaustion he felt has vanished, and all he could do was admire this masterpiece before him. You were waiting for him again.

As much as he wanted to see you like this longer, he couldn't let you sleep on the couch. There's a much more comfortable bed waiting for you upstairs. He approached you with quiet footsteps. The puppy perked up, her superb hearing picking up the sound of his advancement. Daisuke knelt down and stroked her head. "Good evening, Chico." Then he turned to you. You looked so peaceful - parted lips, even breathing. He leaned forward and pecked your cheek, smiling a small smile when you shifted. "Good evening, love."

You let out a yawn as you rubbed your eyes, body shuffling. "Daisuke?" You groaned out. "Is that you?"

Daisuke knew you couldn't see him but he nodded anyway. "You don't have to keep waiting for me like this, you know."

To his surprise, you wrapped your arms around him and pulled yourself closer to his body. "But I want to. And I missed you." You yawned through your statement as you nuzzled your head on his neck. "You still smell good after being outside the whole day. How unfair."

Daisuke let out a chuckle. "Come on. Let's get you to bed." He stood up easily even with your form carried in his arms. Chico jumped out of the couch at the same time and followed Daisuke as he carried you upstairs to your shared room, lying you down carefully on the bed. Daisuke made an attempt to withdraw from the withholding grapple of your arms around his neck but his endeavor was less then proliferant as you have established a stronger hold on him, unrelenting.

Daisuke let out a sigh as he tried to adjust from the uncomfortable stance he was positioned in. "I need to change first, Y/N." Badgered Daisuke, hands resting on your back.

Yet his words did no preclude you and you merely shook your head in response. "No," Your eyes shone with defiance, pout manifesting on your lips. "Stay."

"I'll come back in a few, love. I can't sleep in my work clothes." Insisted Daisuke, resolve crumbling the more he looked into your eyes.

"I don't care. Just stay." You grumbled.

Sometimes Daisuke sometimes wondered just how much power you had over him. He couldn't say no to you, apart for that one time when you asked if you two could get a puppy. Looking back at it, he felt guilty that he did not allow you two to have a dog earlier but if it wasn't for his stubborness, you wouldn't have come across Chico.

Speaking of the little puppy, it had successfully jumped on the bed and let out a merry howl. Distracted by the new development of the young dog, you were able to pull Daisuke down on the space beside you and did not think twice before snuggling to his side, arms embracing him tightly as you grinned happily, a happy giggle exiting your lips. You rubbed your head on his shoulders, sighing contentedly. "You're staying here with us."

Daisuke looked down at your beaming face and looked away, redness tinting his cheeks. "If it can't be helped." He stated, but he knew he made his choice the moment you had told him to stay.

Daisuke slowly wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer, and you willingly accepted his affection. You were so warm, so loving. How did he ever find you?

And then came the cloud of exhaustion. His eyelids gradually drooped over his sockets, his strength withering every second that had gone by until the last thing he saw before sleep overcame him was you and a bounding Chico burying herself in between the two of you.

[70swizards]

marauders in a bakery

jamesiepoo:

would absolutely LOVE to work with dough

would make the biggest mess

tries to act like those italian chefs that spin the pizza dough, EVEN THO HES NOT MAKING PIZZA

refuses to clean after himself. what’s cleaning?

wears “kiss the cook” apron

“LILY YOU MUST RESPECT THE WORDS OF THE WISE APRON! now kiss the cook please”

gives you literal “helping his mum in the kitchen” vibes

listens to muggle music in the bakery and everyone is just so fed up bECAUSE HE HAS TO HAVE IT AT ITS HIGHEST VOLUME

initiates food fights

teaching baby hazza his recipes and lily walking in screaming, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING- DONT CORRUPT THE CHILD” even though she’s looking at him with so much fondness

early morning pancake surprises

breakfast in bed for whoever he’s living with

DANCES AROUND THE KITCHEN WITH THE DRAMATIC ASS MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND

edits recipes to make them so much better

glasses go all wonky and he’s got bits of food all over them after cooking

all the mess it worth it at the end bc the resukt is perfect

seerius blek:

his favourite part is dusting the pastries with powdered sugar

gets lily accidentally involved in food fights and ends up running for his life

“i’m the best cook!” *burns pasta water*

he uses box mixes for cakes and tells remus he made it from scratch, and after remus finds the box in the trash sirius just turns into a dog and goes “you wouldn’t hurt a poor innocent dog would you 🥺”

cries over james’ lava cake

COOKS WITH DOG FOOD

he does it as a prank and everyone else is just like wha t t h e f uc k is wrong with this man while he just eats the dog food happily

often gets banned from the bakery

HAIR IS ALWAYS TIED WITH HIS WAND AND THERE ARE THESE LITTLE STRANS THAT STAY OUT- he looks like a vogue model

leaves the dishes to “soak” so he can clean them later

never touches the dishes ever again

hazel said sirius loves jelly so sirius loves jelly and would force james into making it for him often

“IM NKT THE ONE MAKING A MESS HWRE- *YOURE* MAKINF A MESS OKAY”

“that’s NOT my hair in your food.”

sobs like a child when cutting onions

remmy the ratatouille:

“i’m literally not even a rat”

“I DONT CARE IF YOUT mEtHoD IS MORE FUN JAMES. THIS IS MORE EFFICIENT”

somehow makes the most food eith the least mess

it’s bc of this magical thing he does

it’s called cleaning after himself

“james i love you so much but get the fuck out i cant watch that, please i’m begging you”

*right after calling james out for being messy* *drops the bag of flour followed by fluent cursing*

“it seems to me that you’re the one making the mess rem”

usuallt says he doesn’t wanna help but when he sees someone doing something in a different way he’d go “can we please do it this way? like this- look” *does it himself, smiling*

was once reading before coming to the bakery so his glasses were up in his hair

while he was making cake batter, he looks down and the glasses just fall into the batter and he almsot cried because

“THIS IS THE FOURTH PAIR THIS MONTH IM GONNA FUCKING COMMIT A CRIME”

acts like he hates food fights but as soon as he gets hit- it’s over for everyone. to say the least, make sure you’ve booked a bed at the infirmary

will fucking throw you off the eiffel tower if you even think of tasting raw batter

ALWAYS. WASHING. HIS. HANDS.

never uses specific measurements

“i’ll just eye it”

mostly controls and monitors them

loves to make cinnamon rolls and sirius makes the icing

peter pan:

will knock everyhting down accidentally

pro taster, will immediately know what’s missing

bowl licker

he will eat everyhtunt thrown at him in a food fight BECAUSE DID YOU ACTUALLY THINK YOU HAVE ANYTHING ON ME? HA YOU BITCH IM FONNA DESTROY YOH

when cleaning after himself, he turns the tap onto the highest setting and just splashes himself and everyhtunt arounf him

A TOTAL CLUTZ

cooking is his love language

ABSOLUTELY ADORES TO MAKE LITTLE FINGER FOODS WITH THE TOOTHPICKS ON TOP

LOVES to work with puff pastry

will literally make up recipes from scratch in class and give them to james to try

GETS SUPER MESSY AND HIS APRON ENDS UP BEING SOAKED IN BATTER

he picks at everyhtunt he’s making so he’ll start off with enough to serve 12 and end up with enough to serve 8

who listens to serving proportions anyways

CO M B I N ES A L L R E C IP E S

cooks or bakes when he’s bored

coukd litwrallt start a business

gets his mums cooking notes to show the marauders

refuses to use magic when cooking

lily flower:

washes EVERYTHING

if you’re working with fish, eggs, meat, chicken, or anything of the sort, she should supervise bc she doesn’t want you to make a mess with them.

proceeds to spray clorox everywhere

CAKE DECORATING G O D D E S S

will carry baby hazza in one hand and cook with the other

“leave my child out of this james, HE DOES WHATEVER SEEMS FUN TO HIM AND JT DOES NOT MAKE IT THE NEW RIGHT WAY”

owns a bakery with a little library on the side

peter is the co-owner

she never lets james cook dinner bc she does not appreciate the mess he leaves behind

but always let’s him cook bc she knows he loves it

helps james clean the kitchen but ends up becoming a make-out session with her sitting on the countertop and james standing in front of her

hazel thought of orange juice so lily loves orange juice 

makes harrys birthday cakes with james and lets baby hazza help in the tiniest ways

[bluebrine]

ask meme time

tagged in by @a-humble-goblin​! C:

name: i go by Blue here!

nickname: ..... well, Blue again! (or whatever shorthand of my URLs ppl have used in the past... i never was enough of an active poster anywhere to get real nicknames given to me lol)

zodiac: as piscean as a pisces could be! 🐟

height: 5′8 (the shorty of the family.... curse you, 6′5 brother!!)

languages: monolingual english speaker here. shoulda kept up with spanish from high school, but alas :( looking to learn latin for taxonomic purposes someday though!

nationality: american- but more specifically, tennessean! ��️ ~good ol’ rocky top...

favorite season: the cool seasons! ^^ fall and winter are the best. the rain and wind of spring is also nice though! (basically anything except the sweaty-ass days of southern summers are alright with me lol)

favorite flower: oh boy. uh. i like a lot of plants... this one’s a toughie! it changes depending on what’s in season tbh. right now its the sweet little things we call ‘field pansies’ around here. they’re one of the first things to catch my attention on these early, sunny spring days

proper name is Veronica peduncularis, or ‘creeping speedwell’. sadly its not native to my area though :(

favorite scent: literally nothing on earth smells better than onions & garlic frying on the stovetop. full-stop. a fool-proof way to lure me into any trap, would 100% work in any situation

favorite fictional character: this changes depending on what i’m fixating on atm, but i’m on a dishonored kick rn, so it’s my girl lizzie stride! B) i’m always a sucker for mean-ass, violent gang ladies and she checks every box on my list tbh (and those TEETH. woof)

coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: hot chocolate babey!! B) i’m just here for tasty sweet drinks- i don’t care for tea or coffee at all. i have to add an ungodly amount of cream & sugar anyway to make ‘em drinkable. (also, caffeine literally does nothing to wake me up. its a cruel fate for my eternally tired self)

average sleep: i’m on a senior citizen’s sleep schedule... usually in bed by 9:30-11:00, & up at 5:00-6:00. a big leap from my early days of bed at 4 am, and pulling all-nighters..... i don’t think i could physically do that nowadays lmao

dogs or cats: hmm, cats slightly more probably? they’re more relaxing to be around, which is nice. love both though! (i have no pets atm, but looking to adopt some pigeons in the future! 🕊)

my old cat louie was my baby though. not sure any other cat can one-up his grumpy ass, but one day i’d like to have another cat with me. (he looks polite here but he was a total butthole, don’t be fooled!!)

number of blankets: 1 (one) big-ass weighted comforter (20 lbs)

dream trip: i would love to see the pacific ocean some day! 🌊

blog established: uh, i know it was the summer before i started high school...? oh god. i was a baby. who let me on here

random fact: the american persimmon (Diospyros virginiana) is a tree with fruit so popular in its native ecosystem, that it also goes by such delightful names as possum apples, deer candy, or sugar plums!

(bonus tmi fact: most of the seeds i’m propagating this year were found as the aftermath to some happy possum or coyote’s fall meal. but hey, according to this paper, the digestive process of these mammals actually boosts germination rates! go nature)

current time: 3:30 pm! a lovely overcast afternoon on this fine weekend of mine

favorite musical artists: Ulvesang, Black Hill, The Crane Wives, The Oh Hellos (... my favs are really just what i’ve been listening to recently lmao)

stuck in my head: gimme gimme gimme! by ABBA :y

last movie i saw: hmm... that would have to be knives out! saw it with em after we were gonna go laugh at cats, but missed it by like 2 days :( knives out was fun tho! hadn’t been to an actual theatre for a while, so the experience was nice. got to split one of those giant buckets of grease-corn, which was amazing

last thing i googled: .... technically, it was ‘fish emoji’ for this post. before that it was ‘american wild persimmon seed germination’ because i just got mine outta the fridge and into the pots for the spring! hope to have an ok amount sprout... i’d like to see these guys fruiting in a few years! (2 seeds per section- assuming a success rate of 25%, i might get 12 trees out of these! we will see)

lucky number: don’t really have one? i like the evenness of 8, but i don’t take any real stock in lucky numbers

currently wearing: the usual- tank top with comfy shorts!

dream job: working on my paleontology degree right now- trying to make this dream real soon! 🦕

favorite foods: pasta with cream sauces. literally anything that fits that definition is my fav. best combo i’ve made so far is something with grilled chicken, sautéed mushrooms + onions + garlic, and a cream sauce with spinach /chef’s kiss/

instruments: none! ain’t got a musical bone in my entire body 

favorite song: i possibly can’t pick this, but i’m listening to Curses by The Crane Wives right now!

[monbabi]

Can you do them reacting to their S/O being good at baking but horrible at cooking?

ofc!! sorry it took so long exams have been kickin my ass

shownu

• u two are baking brownies for the boys since theyve been stressed lately and u wanted to do something nice for them• shownu watches in awe as u expertly pour in and mix the brown batter in the bowl• u always had some kinda magic touch when it came to baking, u knew how much sugar and flour to add in and when to add the vanilla extract• it just made shownu smile bc wow how cute is that ur working ur butt off for some sweet treats for him and his members• “hey (y/n) i’ll take over the stirring can u make eggs or something? i havent eaten all day”• u freeze and give him a smile• “sure”• u hand him the bowl and walk over to the fridge to grab some eggs. easy enough right?• u crack the eggs into the pan, not failing to leave some egg shell in the yolk thats starting to sizzle in the pan• u turn to shownu whos diligently mixing the batter, workin up a sweat • tbh he looks real good• hes totally shirtless, wearing grey sweatpants and to top it off, a cute little pink apron that looks like its gonna bust open at the seams• u lean against the stove, basking in the appearance of this actual adonis in an adorably domestic setting • unfortunately u totally forget that stoves are hot and pull ur hand away as it stings with heat• shownu puts the bowl down and rushes over to u, holding ur hands and blowing frantically at them• “babe are u okay?” he asks worriedly, his eyes watching ur reaction closely to see if ur in any great pain• u reassure him “im fine” until u hear the beeping of the fire alarm• “oh my GOD”• u turn around to see the pan totally covered in SMOKE and shownu switches the stove off • ur kinda upset that u cant even make eggs for ur boyfriend but shownu just chuckles and kisses ur forehead• “next time i’ll cook okay?”

wonho

• “baby are u hungry?” wonho comes into ur shared room where ur sitting in bed on ur phone. he wraps his arms around ur waist and nuzzles his nose into ur neck• u smile at the sensation. “mm kinda? what do u wanna eat?”• he gives u a knowing smile and u sigh and get up from the mattress• “ramen?”• he smiles and takes a hold of ur hand, stroking ur index finger with his thumb • u know me so well"• the two of u chase each other to the kitchen and u grab the very familiar plastic bowl labelled shin ramen • u rip off the lid and unlock the hot water dispenser, filling the bowl to an unsteady level where the water is teetering around the edges. u put the bowl in the microwave and punch in 50 seconds• all seems well until u hear some popping noises from inside the microwave• “um. babe”• “yea?” u ask, too scared to turn around and see what happened inside the microwave• “did u take out the sauce packet before adding water and putting it in there?”• “oh my g-”• BEEP• wonho moves u out of the way and opens the microwave, his face contorting at the smell of burning plastic and the sight of ramen sauce power all over the inner surface. some soup flowed over the top too• u laugh nervously, put ur hand over wonhos, and close the microwave. u head over to the fridge and take out a plate• “how about we eat the macarons i made yesterday?” u give a sheepish smile• a smile creeps onto his face and a goofy laugh escapes his lips. ur hysterically laughing and he’s bent over his knees, so thoroughly amused by ur antics• “man i dont know how u do it. but yea i’ll take a macaron” he opens his mouth. u pop one into his mouth and he chews then hums with delight• “these are so good??? what happened just now? are u the same (y/n) i know and love?”• u two laugh again and he puts u in a playful headlock and plants kisses on the top of ur head

minhyuk

• u got a text earlier that ur boyfriends gonna come home late so u wanna surprise him with a nice meal• u can bake a mean cake but ur not too confident about ur cooking abilities• but u’ve baked minhyuk so many cookies and cakes and cupcakes ur worried for that boys blood sugar• so after watching 3 youtube tutorials u try to make kimchi stew, one of his favorites• u roll up ur sleeves and get to work. u throw some broth and vegetables into the pot• u cut some kimchi then some fishcake some spring onions u get the pork out of the fridge• u think its going well • until u get a text from minhyuk that he’s on the way home• according to ur calculations he was supposed to be coming home late• shit• u do some quick math if u boil the stew at maximum heat for 2 minutes u’ll finish in time before minhyuk gets home so u crank that stove up and • KACHOW the pot overflows• soup is everywhere, the kimchi is on the floor, ur kitchen looks like a natural disaster• “honey! where are u???”• he comes into the kitchen sweaty from practice and ur just on the floor crying next to ur empty pot, food is scattered around the floor• “oh baby what happened?” he cooes at u and crouches down next to u, wiping ur tears with his thumb• u barely manage to get a sentence out• “i-i tried to cook u” u hiccup, “something but e-everything just fell apart” • he kisses u on the forehead and stands up to grab his phone• “well i like pizza. how about we order some pizza and we watch kitchen nightmares yea?” u flinch at kitchen nightmares. “okay how about we watch house hunters” u nod frantically and smile• totally ignore the mess on the floor• u clean it up eventually dont worry

kihyun

• u made a deal with minhyuk that at the next house party u were gonna cook something to bring and kihyun was gonna bake a cake to bring along with the food u made and in return he was gonna make a video of himself flicking a booger and post it on instagram• the problem? minhyuk knows u cant cook for shit and kihyun cant bake for shit • kihyun originally protested saying “he doesn’t want his house to end in flames” but after minhyuk kept egging him on saying he was a wuss, he threw on his apron and started reading martha stewart books• so u and him are in ur kitchen, face in hands and sitting at the counter• “why did i agree to this”• “why did i let u agree to this”• u sigh and slide off the stool. “i mean i can make like, fried rice right?” kihyun groans. “knowing u it might result in a call to 911” u shoot him a glare. “hey bobby flay at least i know how to bake a cake”• he scratches his head and gets off the stool. “how about we make this a competition between ourselves. whoever makes the better dish wins”• “ur on yoo kihyun”• its like iron chef u two start scrambling around ur kitchen, opening cabinets and packages • u lift the lid of the rice cooker and groan in frustration as u see a clean, empty container• kihyun indulges himself in a shrill giggle until it abruptly stops when he’s opened the last cabinet and found no cake mix• “u’ve got to be kidding me” • u hover over the grey pot, finally shutting off the faucet when the rice grains look like they’re drowning in tap water • kihyun’s throwing sugar, flour, and eggs into a bowl, trusting his “chef’s intuition” that he doesn’t need measuring cups for a mere cake• u throw the soggy rice into the pan and just start adding stuff u think will taste good together in there. zucchini, bits of kale, ketchup, leftover chicken that probably has been sitting in ur fridge for at least 2 weeks • it smells pretty goddamn awful but when u look over at kihyun u think u have a good shot at winning• he’s gotten green food coloring all over his hands and t-shirt and the batter’s completely runny• “how u doin ogre there”• “im never doing this ever again”

hyungwon

• u two are laying on opposite sides of the couch, sitting up to show each other dog pictures and whatnot• u see a video on instagram showing u how to make this yummy looking beef over rice thing• u lean over hyungwons knee, excitedly showing him the video and how u should make it for him• he gives u this knowing look • “(y/n) do u remember the last time u cooked something?”• “no why”• “i was taking a nap and u tried to make this weird chicken thing u saw on youtube”• “uh huh”• “and when i walked into the kitchen”• “yea?”• “i have never seen so much fire-”• u playfully slap him on the thigh, pouting. “i forgot to turn the stove down while it was boiling!!!” u huff, turning away while crossing ur arms• hyungwon laughs and sits up to ruffle ur hair• “but u made it up by baking cupcakes to give to the very nice firemen who saved our apartment”• u giggle and bring ur knees up to ur chin, reminiscing in the time u almost burned down ur entire apartment complex• hyungwon sits crosslegged facing u, staring at ur face• “what?”• “im just wondering how the hell u managed to do that”• “no cupcakes for u then”• he whines and the two of u share a laugh and settle back into the sofa to continue laughing at twitter memes

jooheon

• he never fails to send u a text asking if u’ve eaten yet and if ur free, to go out and get lunch together• its the sweetest thing and u decide u wanna do something nice for him• so u roll up ur sleeves and make a lunchbox for him. its kinda childish but it seems easy to make and for ur……limited cooking skills, its ideal• ur in the kitchen, scraping an egg off the pan as it burns to a crisp• “aw man that was the last egg,” u whine, looking at all the failed prototypes on a plate next to the stove• u begrudgingly roll up the burnt egg in the lunchbox and set up some lettuce on the side, trying to make it presentable at least• now time for the Meat• the last time u cooked meat was when u and jooheon were out eating kbbq and whenever the tongs were in ur hand u’d somehow toss the meat in a way that cooked it. lets say well overdone• jooheon had to call a worker to get the fire down even tho it was at its lowest heat. nobody on the restaurant knows how u did it• so yea ur not the best at cooking meat but hey second times the charm• so u slide the beef into the pan, satisfied with the sizzling sound that came after• now the hard part. knowing when to flip it so it doesnt slowly burn into charcoal. so u just keep flipping it mindlessly, too scared to let it burn• the beef is just NOT turning the brown that it usually does when jooheon cooks it and u settle for when the beef is a weird brown, pink, red—u dont even know what color it is but its 12:30pm and jooheons lunch break is about to start• u shrug as u pack the lunchbox. u made cookies before this mess so• u drive up to the building complex and climb up the stairs to his studio. u punch in the passcode and pop the door open• jooheon hears the door click and turns around in his chair, giving u that sweet dimpled smile • u show him the lunchbox and bag of cookies u’ve been hiding behind ur back and he opens his arms to bring u into a hug• “how did i get so lucky?” he kisses the top of ur head and sits u down on his lap• he turns the chair around and u place the lunchbox and the cookie bag on his desk in front of his monitor and open it• he has to stop himself from laughing, the corners of his lips trembling to rise into a smile. u flick him on the arm, a smile growing on ur own face. “shut up i tried my best!!!!!”• jooheon kisses ur temple, a small chuckle leaving his lips still dumbfounded by the mess of food in the lunchbox• “i made cookies?” u suggest• “yea we can share those” jooheon closes the lunchbox

changkyun

• u guys ate out at this one restaurant that had really good pork stir fry• so naturally u two went to the internet and searched up recipes to cook at home, inspired by the dish• after finding a seemingly easy recipe online, u and changkyun head to the kitchen and grab whatevers in ur fridge• oh by the way its 1 in the morning so theres no supermarkets still open • it sounded like a good idea at the time• anyways u two are jus rummaging through ur kitchen, substituting whatever needs to be substituted• “hey kyun we’re outta sugar”• “we have lucky charms”• “that works” • u and him lay out the shabby ingredients on the counter• pork? eh leftover hot wings should do• bok choy? iceberg lettuce thats been sitting in ur fridge for 3 months• but at least u have soy sauce• u start choppin up the lettuce, slicin and dicin and ignoring whatever wilted leaves u see bc hey food is food• changkyun: hey how do i start the stove• “…….ur kidding right”• u put down ur knife and walk to the stove, hesitant to turn any knobs• “um its this one right?”• u switch on the stove on the inner right corner which seemed fine to u…….until the roll of napkins next to it caught fire• “HOLY SH-” “HOLY SHIT”• the fire alarm starts beeping and u freak out and start blowing on it until changkyun shoves his hand into ur face. “DONT BLOW ON IT ITLL GET BIGGER” • “WHAT DO WE DO THEN”• luckily ur dating the son of a scientist so he grabs a pot lid from the cabinet underneath and throws it on top of the fire, stopping the flow of oxygen and u hear the sizzle of ur bounty napkins • u and changkyun breathe out a relieved sigh and u lean on him• u suggest making cookies tomorrow and changkyun insists on putting lucky charms in them• u roll ur eyes, “yea yea whatever lets clean up and go to bed”