#the vibes are absolutely horrendous. i love it here

[dumbbitchawards]

Worst double date ever destroys entire cafe out of sheer bad vibes

[plutoasteroids]

PAC How Will Your Future Spouse View You

Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3

DISCLAIMER THIS IS A GENERAL READING TAKE WHAT RESONATES AND LEAVE WHAT DOESN'T.

Strictly for entertainment purposes.

PILE 1

So, before I get into the tarot bit of the reading the overall vibe I am getting is that you and your future spouse will be that couple that are still doing cute stuff together even in old age. You know those older couples you see on TikTok on dates still happy and very much in love, yeah like that. One word I can use to describe it is cozy, just very warm and affectionate basically feeling like this person is your home. It's going to be like 'I'd rather come home to you then be anywhere else'.

On to the tarot bit, Your FS sees you as someone very confident and optimistic (even if you don't see yourself that way). They see you as being positive and very wholesome. Again, before I pulled cards I channelled and I still got the warmth.

Oh my gosh, if any of you have read The Song of Achilles that's basically it. Before anyone points out to me they were a same sex couple .Yes, I know but I am talking about the relationship dynamic between Patroclus and Achilles.

You may have gone through a difficult time in your life and your future spouse will admire how strong and resilient you are, how you're able to adapt to challenges and changes in environment. You may be the type of person who is connected to both their divine feminine and masculine and they truly find that attractive.

They certainly view you as their other half and I know its cliche to say soulmate but that's all your future spouse is saying. You just give them so much happiness and emotional fulfilment.

'They are my home, my soulmate, my forever'

PILE 2

Ugh Pile 2 your spouse will literally worship you😩. Like you'll tell them your insecurities and they'll just sit there kissing every scar, mark, dimple anything you're insecure about they'll adore. If you're a female or a feminine reading this and you have thick thighs I heard them say 'Come here and crush my skull with those sexy thighs'. Whoever you are you have someone's poor child down horrendous for you.

I think they may be the type to just watch your social media whether you are getting to know each other, dating, engaged or married your social media pages, pictures and videos will always be on their phone screen and they won't go to sleep without listening to a little voice message you sent. Once they get attached baby there's absolutely no getting rid of them, I heard 'You'll have an easier time getting rid of bed bugs'.

When you meet them, they may be a party animal or a player.

Disclaimer it's not toxic obsession more like they will let you be your own person but at the end of the day they are yours and you are theirs, you are their spouse, and they are your spouse and they will forever put you on a pedestal not to the open where they will neglect themselves.

They see you as a prize (again not in a creepy way) You may have options when you meet this person but best believe they'll make sure to stand out and win you over. They see you as the best the world has to offer in terms of what a wife/husband/spouse should be. Your person may have had a few letdowns when it came to love and just know that they see you as a dream come true and again, I know that's very cliche but trust me when Isay they view having you as a spouse as their biggest accomplishment and they want you to know that they'll prove to you every day they are worthy to call themselves your spouse. They feel like you have gone through a period of depression and sadness, and they want you to know that they acknowledge it and they see you as strong every day.

The couple I channelled for you guys is Queen Charlotte and King George from Bridgerton.

PILE 3

First thing I heard 'Sugar Daddy'. This person will spoil you but love you even more. Yes, they may have money and give you gifts but this person truly does love you, care about you and respect you.

They may be older than you that's why people may think that they are your glucose guardian which is not technically wrong and not technically correct either. I feel like that will be a long term joke you two have about them being your sucrose supplier..

They will definitely view you as delicate, I want to say that they are the protective type but not protective to the point of you feeling suffocated by them. They want you to be comfortable and have what you like 'If my spouse wants that watch I'll get it for them'.

They will view you as fun loving, yet you have this air of power to you that they love. Sure, they view you as delicate and they want to protect you, but they also view you as strong and beyond capable of taking care of yourself and those around you basically your spouse is saying 'they want me, but they don't need me'. They know that you can walk away from them anytime and they like that you're always in your power no matter what.

Your spouse admires how you don't need them to feel whole or for financial gain they see you as a breath of fresh air, a change of pace, an adventure.

He may touch you a lot with your consent obviously, like a hand on your waist, shoulder or they may steal little quick kisses. Also, there may be a lot of friendly banter in the relationship.

The couple I channel for you guys is Fallon and Liam from Dynasty.

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Ronald Colman (Arrowsmith, Random Harvest, Prisoner of Zenda)—"God! Ronnie Colman! Wasn't he marvelous? He had the greatest movie technique I've ever known in my life!" -Vincent Price

James Dean (Rebel Without A Cause, East of Eden)—can i just say that while james dean was horrendously hot, he also had a i-want-to-pick-him-up-and-carry-him-around-in-my-pocket-slash-hoodie-and-feed-him-treats kind of vibe to him? maybe it was because he was only 5'7, or maybe it was because (to me, at least) he constantly looked like a sopping wet poor little meow meow, or maybe it's because his eyebrows looked like they were too big for him. whatever it was, i'm beginning to understand why people still have posters of him in their rooms.

This is round 3 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut]

James Dean propaganda:

Ronald Colman propaganda:

No one, not even Douglas Fairbanks, could match Ronald Colman's screen close-ups. They were marvellous because he had a beautiful face, and because he had a deep but gentle masculinity: the ideal of the dark Englishman. — Laurence Olivier

Ronnie became not just an actor for me, but a way of life. — Vincent Price

"I wanna give some propaganda for Ronald Colman! His face acting made him a star in the silent era but when the arrival of the talkie brought one megastar after another down to earth he was one of the only ones to become more popular due to his voice, and became the blueprint for the “mellifluous voiced Englishman” type that Laurence Olivier and James Mason would later become known for. And to prove it here he is reading Shakespeare"

"1920s heartthrob to 1930s matinée idol to 1940s silver fox Oscar winner to 1950s comedy radio star, this man could do it ALL. I feel he is unfairly neglected today despite his smile making it into P.G. Wodehouse novels and the knee-melting qualities of his voice making it into a Rodgers & Hammerstein musical. A women's college made him the winner in their hottest celebrity poll in 1942, and I am right there with them. He was by all accounts an absolutely lovely person, as well, but I recognize that this poll is about the hotness and I think that Ronald Colman deserves more recognition for being ridiculously handsome and doing heartbreaking face-acting and having weaponizable quantities of charm. Also he saved David Niven's life (according to the latter's memoir) by shooting a shark once. Very sexy of him."

He was a wonderful friend; steady, true, full of wisdom and humour. He was generous and completely unbitchy unlike so many actors. A great actor, the master of the understated playing, and one many people (including me) tried hard to copy. A glorious speaking voice, dirty great brown 'fan' eyes, a smile that lit up the whole of Beverly Hills, and a man who could give a lame dog or a struggling actor a lift with never a thought of self-congratulation. — David Niven

[radioisntdead]

can we get op reader just beating the absolute SHIT out of valentino while vox and velvette watch on in horror? :3 perhaps others too, like perchance we somehow stutmbled upon valentino's set while angel was there and are just *appalled* and therefore decide his second living privileges need to be taken away <3

- snake

Good evening my dear!

When I tell you I audibly screamed when I read this request I mean it my dear! I despise Valentino and I adore this request! I did change some things because it didn't make much sense for the reader to just pop into the studio randomly and start going ham, so I went with some light backstory and causally gave the reader the found family treatment, anyways enjoy!

The Forgotten one

Reader fic,

Warnings!!

Mild torture {I say mild but limbs are getting ripped off, I don't go into detail and there isn't much of it but be warned!!} I'm imagining reader as an eldritch horror, This is literally just the reader murdering the grape guy horrendously, Reader ended up in eternal damnation for a reason! Also I'm imagining the reader to be British??? I don't know why, that was accidental but if you get British vibes that's why.

You died centuries ago, your generation laid long forgotten, you could barely remember your life before the black death had claimed it, you could just barely recall the high fever, hurling over in your cot and spitting out the blood that had gathered in your mouth.

You probably weren't the best person since you ended up here, maybe you were a tyrannical peasant? A murderer? A person of the night? A thief?

Maybe you had a family, maybe you were wedded, maybe you had kids, maybe you didn't.

Who knows, you certainly didn't.

You wondered if you will ever be able to recall those forgotten memories about your life.

All you knew is that you climbed the ranks quickly once you ended up in the underworld, gaining many souls, and power one could only dream of, becoming a feared overlord.

You've gone through many names, The dark one, the Wicked, The witch, the Warlock, A child of darkness, the devil's child, {That one didn't age well},

Most recently though you were deemed as the forgotten one, always lurking, watching, never coming out into the spotlight unless necessary, sending one of the souls you kept in your place while you hid in your castle.

However decades of solitude gets rather boring,

So you decided to go out, see what was new, after all when was the last time you were out and about? The 70's? Oh you adored the results of that decade.

Well venturing out turned out to be such treat! Turns out that fellow who adored ducks's charming daughter opened a hotel to redeem sinners! Oh how darling it was!

You popped in to visit it, finding the residents quite lovely, you simply adored how Charlie thought that you of all sinners could be redeemed! It was quite a foolish thought

But you liked that hotel along with it's lovely little residents,and if playing along with the Princess's delusions of you getting redeemed after so, so many harsh years, would let you stay in that hotel and cure your boredom then it wouldn't hurt to entertain that foolish thought now would it?

And so you stayed as one of the residents on the path of so-called redemption!

you got along well enough with the others, although Vaggie and Alastor were suspicious of you at first, although you and Alastor got along well after bonding over how the noisy picture box was overrated, it had wow'd you at first but that quickly faded as it progressed,

It took Vaggie awhile to trust you, but after you had taught her some of the skills you had picked up in your lifetime you became like a parental figure to the woman, which played out well as Charlie was already quite fond of you,

You had practically proclaimed them both as your daughter and daughter in law, you adored them both, baking them treats, gifting Vaggie a pair of some type weapon, giving Charlie something related to unicorns, or a joint gift for them,

You quite liked their reactions upon receiving something they liked,

You liked seeing them happy a little too much, so much that you started giving the others things you thought they might like, expensive alcohol for Husk, shiny sharp knifes to hunt bugs down with for dear niffty, vintage radios for Alastor, tools and things for inventing for Sir Pentious, and matching clothes for Fat nuggets and Angel for Angel dust,

You liked seeing their expressions when they liked something, it gave a warm, bubbly feeling in your stomach,

You liked spending time with everyone too.

Chatting at the bar with husk, Angel dust explaining things to you that you don't know, watching your fellow residents sleep with Sir Pentious, sparring with Vaggie, scrapbooking with Charlie, watching one of Niffty's roach puppet shows, taking a trip to cannibal town with Alastor to visit Rosie,

You slowly began seeing the hotel residents like family, you didn't have a family, or at least you didn't anymore so you don't know exactly how they worked but you thought that this was good enough,

They were your beloved family now, formed from delusional hope,

and you were their family reborn from a forgotten era, burned to ashes and thrown to the dark pits filled with brimstone, sin and death.

You'd do anything for them, you'd die for them, you'd live for them, and you'd kill for them, they most definitely were your family now.

And you typically protect family, right?

Right?

You heard about what happened in Valentino's studio with Angel dust, the bruises.

You were displeased,

More then displeased you were upset, you were angry, how long has it been since you were this angry how dare someone lay a hand on your dear family member?

You waited until the majority of the hotel were asleep, most notably Angel,

You made up an excuse to go out, saying you had to check up on your castle after all you had unfortunate sinners working there and they're headless chickens without you!

Charlie told you to stay safe before she went up to bed with Vaggie.

You would be safe!

fortunately though, a certain Vee, would not be safe.

You did stop by your castle, to grab a spear with Angelic steel, you mentally thanked yourself for grabbing it a several extermination days ago,

You twirled it in your hand before a large sinister grin over took your face.

It had been awhile since you were out for blood.

Getting into the Vee's tower was disappointingly easy! Scaling up the wall and breaking a window? Child's play!

What wasn't easy was finding Valentino, the bald pimp moth guy, you had to look through several rooms, why did they have so many rooms? Did they even need these???

Nevermind all that, after searching for an inconvenient amount of time,

you finally found the one that had dared to harm your dear family member, you tilted your head as Valentino squinted to see who you were, unraveling his wings once he didn't recognize you.

He didn't look like much, he was tall, red eyes, and he looked like a grape with wings, the grimaced, oh poor Angel Dust, he had to look at this everytime he went to work!

Thankfully after this he didn't need too, you twitched, transforming into a more demonic form.

"Who the fu-"

He didn't get to finish the sentence as you swiftly kicked him in the kneecap causing him to fall, cursing you and wincing at the sudden pain in his knee, taking that moment you kicked him again, this time on his side, pushing him properly on the ground, placing your shoe on his ribcage you began to slowly crush his rib, grinning at the beginnings of a cracking noise

Unfortunately the little grape screamed out for the TV fucker to appear,

You could hear the sound of cables getting ripped out and the sound of footsteps.

"Val, what is it this time? Is it about angel dust again, I- ShIT VaL, wHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?''

And the TV man makes an entrance shouting, how annoying, well you could always deal with him later, raising your hand pitch black inky tentrals came out from beside you, wrapping the TV headed man and attaching him onto the couch.

Returning your focus to the soon to be deceased, again, grape

You bent down to wrap a claw onto his wing,

It was soft, maybe you could make something for Niffty with it, a blanket perhaps? Or maybe a coat?

You pulled out the wing as Valentino screamed out in pain, blood splattering onto you, the floor and the walls,

a door swung open behind you before quickly being closed, just barely leaving a gap for a phone camera to sneak though, the owner of the phone looked on in horror.

You kicked Valentino over causing him to hiss and groan as he now laid on his stomach, how unfortunate for him, who knew that if you horrendously abused your employees an centuries old overlord would be out for your blood!

You grinned at how helpless he was now, how pitiful!

You grabbed one of his arms and pulled, nerves and muscles separated and blood leaked out.

Vox looked on in complete and utter horror, he couldn't do anything,

Would he be next?

The Vee's floor was destroyed, Valentino was shredded and separated, stabbed in the head with the angelic steel you had brought along as to ensure he would NOT be coming back.

Both of his wings were folded and set neatly on the counter away from the carnage, after all if you were to make Dear Niffty something with them they had to be clean, mostly, you'd have to clean them again, who knows what diseases that man was carrying, Yuck!

You took some of the carnage and place them into containers before putting them in a bag to carry with you, you tucked the detached wings under your arm, dusting yourself off you checked the digital clock on the wall,

You should get back quickly, they'll be up soon.

Moving around the broken glass and furniture that had gotten caught up in the downfall of Valentino you made your way out the door,

You let Vox free from your tendrils, hearing him move to possibly inspect the remains of his business partner and whatever else.

You wonder if the third one was still recording?

Oh well, that's none of your concern,

You knocked things over, shattered, torn and destroyed anything you could get your hands on as you went down the Vee's tower, destroying what you could.

At the bottom floor a box of fireworks caught your eye, you supposed it was for one of the Vee's something, maybe Velvette's fashion thing or one of the skinned grape's filthy films,

Well either way, you were going to borrow the fireworks, set them up on the ground floor and light em' up,

The fireworks boomed onto the floor, sparkling and bursting into flames, burning and sizzling anything it could get it's clutches on.

You left swiftly after, getting bored, and you were practically done anyways.

You should head home now, and stop by your castle to dispose of that spear.

You hummed as you moved around the kitchen swinging a spatula around on your finger before checking on the meat that was beginning to brown in the pan,

"Good Morning [Name!]"

Charlie popped into the kitchen, turning your head to her, you smiled at her,

"Morning Dear Charlie, I'm preparing breakfast for everyone, French toast for the majority and I picked up some fresh demon meat to make something else for Dear Alastor since he doesn't like sweet things,"

"Really? That's so sweet of you!''

"Mhm, It's nothing, But be a dear and call everyone to the dining room so they can feast?"

You ask tilting your head as Charlie nodded with a 'Yes!' before hopping off to gather everyone for breakfast.

You turn back to the stove, poking your spatula into the simmering remains of Valentino, hopefully the peppers and seasons make him taste decent, you would hate for everyone else to enjoy their food and Alastor be the only one to not enjoy the meal.

Hopefully they didn't suspect you when the news covers Valentino's demise and the destroyed tower.

You are not a good person by any means, you were condemned for a reason, this all started to sooth your boredom, you can NEVER be redeemed....

Or could you?

Maybe this little makeshift family that you desperately want to protect could change you, make you a better person.

It was a foolish thought, but as long as you can make them a mildly concerning breakfast, spend time with them, give them trinkets you think they would like, you were willing to entertain that foolish thought, more then willingly.

Thank you for tuning in folks! I'm working on those Susan requests and the other WIPS I have in my pocket so look forward to those!

[dalekofchaos]

The problem with Rey choosing to rebuild the Jedi Order and take the Skywalker name

When I look back on Rey's journey throughout the trilogy is that it's apparent to me that she really doesn't show a desire to be a Jedi.

In The Force Awakens, Rey wanted to find her family, she is mesmerized by so much green in the galaxy and ultimately protecting her friends.

In The Last Jedi she wanted to find her place in the story and bring Ben back to the light. Rey ultimately comes to terms with the fact that she wasn't born into any powerful bloodlines and made peace with her family being gone. Rey forged her own heroine's path and it worked.

In the Rise of Skywalker, Rey goes back to the same hairstyle she had since she was a child and the same outfit in TFA, but in white, it's like all the growth from the last movie never happened. Rey's motivation is whatever the plot demanded it to be. She wants to "earn" Luke's Lightsaber(fuck you JJ) and she wants the Jedi to be with her. Now it's a plot convenience to stop the bad guys. And she's in killmode everytime she sees Ben. Now the uplifting message that she's not related to anyone is gone, she's related to the literal Satan of the Star Wars universe. Now she wants to kill Palpatine out of revenge. Now she has this new found reverence for "Master Skywalker" when it was never there to begin with. It's only because of Ben's redemption that she doesn't strike Palpatine in anger. Ben dies, Rey goes to the literal tomb of the Skywalkers and symbol of the family's misery, buries the sabers and takes their name.

TROS absolutely destroyed Rey’s characterization. In a way that’s kind of mind blowing actually. She’s definitely meant to be a parallel character to Luke, but Rian purposely wrote it to subvert fan expectations. A lot of people probably saw the story trajectory following the OG trilogy after TFA, which had a very similar vibe to ANH. However while both Luke and Rey start out as mysterious nobodies, Luke very much did not want to be Vader’s son. His curse was being the son of this monster, and finding out the truth about his lineage. Meanwhile, for Rey, it’s literally the exact opposite. She wants desperately to be apart of something. Kylo points out her weakness perfectly in TLJ- “Your parents threw you like garbage… But you can't stop needing them. It is your greatest weakness. You're looking for them everywhere… in Han Solo… now in Skywalker.” Rey wanted to apart of something bigger than herself to belong. While Luke’s hero’s journey started by accepting his parentage, Rey should’ve begun by accepting that she alone was enough, and she deserved a place in this story for her own merits.

TROS absolutely dismantles this by having Rey discover she’s actually related to the big bad (just like Luke), which somehow earns her a place at the table. Except unlike Luke, who had 3 films prior to truly hate/come to terms with Vader, Rey meets Palpatine in the very last movie, and he essentially becomes a villain-of-the-week or a Marvel villain of sorts. There’s no build up. Rey’s powers suddenly need to be “explained” to the audience, via her lineage, and it’s horrendous because the message of the prior films showed that anyone can have the force. Also Rey suddenly having an attachment to Luke or the Jedi order makes no sense from her character’s perspective. It feels as if Rey is supposed to represent the audience, and her worship of Luke is reminiscent of how fans (who’ve had 47 years of Star Wars fandom prior) should feel about him. But Rey as an individual, as a character, should not view Luke in this way. They did not get along in TLJ, and in the long run, his impact on her was very minimal. And by clinging to past ideas, it just shows Kylo Ren/Ben Solo was right. She can’t stop needing parental figures to feel loved/belonged. She needs to carry that torch.

Now Rey is expected to be this Jedi Master 15 years later.

Here's the problem. Rey has never shown a desire to be a Jedi. It's just something that was necessary to become. They never explored what Rey wanted.

“People keep telling me they know me. No one does” neither did JJ Abrams or DLF, apparently.

To me, Rey's desires were to have a family, to live on a green planet and to live in peace with Ben, her other half. While Ben's story should have been actually completing what Anakin. Saving the one he loved and starting a family.

Ben died and so instead of giving what Rey wanted, she's given what JJ Abrams and DLF wanted, a Jedi's life of duty instead of a desire of love and family.

Now it feels like Rey is going to be like they ended things the way they did so Rey could succeed leading a Jedi Order where Luke failed and to me, that's boring, might as well just say Rey is going to become Legends Luke.

For me, personally, the more interesting story moving forward would be having Rey go darker. Completely subverting fan expectations, but I know Disney won’t do this. However, based on how TROS ended off, I think it could be an interesting way of continuing the story and re-gaining interest from fans who’ve become bored with the same formula.

Just imagine. Rey founded a new Jedi Order, but Rey isn't happy. She thought this is what she wanted, but it isn't. She does her best to mask her feelings from her students and fellow Jedi Council members, but deep down she knows what she wanted is long gone. "But what if he can come back" she thought to herself. she grows darker and starts committing dark acts to bring Ben back. If she condemned herself to the dark side, so be it. If her own Jedi Order turns against her, so be it. She throws away the Skywalker name and leaves the past behind her. She will find Kylo's helmet, wears his sweater and take his title. The force took her other half, so Rey will rip apart the force to bring him back.

Sources

TROS Concept Art

Pablo Ruiz

reyreybutt

clari.saiyazam

[doodle-do-wop]

asking here because i want to see you ramble on tumblr

Oralie and Kenric thoughts?

Bro they are so stupid

Smartest morons you'll ever met in your entire life but soooo so stupid.

Kenric is a walking fashion disaster but unlike Terik who is 'mad hatter crazy rich eccentric uncle' vibes Kenric just looks like shit. Not a fashionable bone in his body and Oralie would rather shot herself in the foot than stand next to him during public appearances and yet willingly chooses the chair next to him anyway like a dumbass.

They're the worst two people to work with because they'll disagree on the stupidest fucking detail that legitimately does not matter and someone please but Liora out of her misery she is begging.

Oralie's tower is pink and perfect and at first it just seems like it's begging for a stain or a crumb but Kenric can see past all of that satin and silk and know that under all the frills Oralie is a mess.

Kenric's tower is oddly cozy but none of this furniture fucking matches, it's like he saw anything on the curb and picked it up as it was. Oralie can't tell if this man does it on purpose and is just really really really committed to the bit or if he genuinely is this incompetent when it comes to making two things look okay being next to each other. It's a mystery. It despite the horrendous furniture and Kenric, the tower is just the best place to find a good window seat to curl up in with a good book and soooo many snacks! Kenric loves to snack! His pantry is stocked with almost any snack, small meal, or tiny nibble.

Oralie keeps the paper industry up and running with how many sticky notes and scrolls she buys, she has three whole jars of pens, pencils, and quills that either don't work, are begging to be put down, or are hanging on by a thread but she likes them too much to throw them away so she spends a solid 16 seconds any time she's at her desk trying to find a pen that works (you'd think she'd have it memorized which ones work and which don't but she buys multiple of the same damn pen, it drives Kenric mad)

They're gossips

They're such horrible horrible gossips

Kenric likes to bother Oralie because she's a workaholic and what the hell is she going to do? Leave her precious work? I don't think so, gossip time >:)

They both stay up late super often so sometimes Kenric goes to Oralie, sometimes Oralie goes to Kenric. Its complicated but also so very very simple. Sometimes Oralie has wrapped herself up in far to many 'what if's and 'possibilities' she's capable of knitting a stress sweater and sometimes Kenric lets himself go too far in his own mind. Sometimes they just need each other, whether they know they do or they don't.

At Galas Oralie and the rest of the women alternate who they walk in with or dance with etc. Oralie dancing or walking in with Kenric is not fu of the romantic tension you think it is because they're fucking gossiping (Again with the gossiping). Oralie is observant and quick and Kenric is a nosy nosy man. When they dance Oralie makes it a point to at least bump her shoe against Kenric's a couple of times, usually in response to a lame joke or when he teases her. When they get to the point where they're absolutely mad about each other and everyone and their wanderling Grandmother can see if their dancing is...different.

They still banter and they still bicker. They haven't lost the 'magic' but like people...things change. They grow and they become something new. And change isn't a bad thing it's just change. And neither mind this new rhyme added to their dances. Kenric can tell when Oralie is going to tap her heel against his shoe, she has this little crinkle between her brows when she's focusing and he's spent long enough noticing all her little quirks and habits to tell when she's getting ready to do it. And he lets her. He thinks it's cute that she's still so fiery, that she hasn't let her stubborn side slip just because things are different now. They both know its different But they're councillors. They can't be fully different. Oralie's duty is to her promise, the oaths and swears she made when she was sworn in. She's too self-destructive to allow herself to be happy above her job. Even if it's her personal duty to herself to be happy.

For now they just dance

Maybe in another life, in another world, another time it will be them

[running-with-the-feels]

Headcanons for Hanzo & Kuai adopting a daughter? I get girldad vibes from both of then

honestly you are so right tho

I think it could go a few ways, bc I don't think they'd set out to adopt a kid, I think it's something that would sort of happen to them.

So if Hanzo is the one suddenly caring for a girl:

He found her in the wreckage of her home, just barely older than a toddler and crying her eyes out.

Shirai Ryu take in sole survivors, so he brings her back to the compound and she just clings to him, refusing to let anyone else near her.

Then Kuai Liang shows up to an alliance meeting and is stunned to find Hazno carrying a small child and suddenly wonders if he's been in a coma for a few years bc how else can you explain this.

As soon as he finds out the truth, he is immediately on board, making her ice sculptures as toys, teaching her to ice skate, showing her how to throw a punch (bc every little girl should know how to defend herself, Hanzo, why are you looking at me like that it's not like I gave her a knife yet)

Kuai Liang becomes her new favorite person and Hanzo pretends he's not bothered by it (He also just thinks Kuai Liang looks good with a kid and doesn't know how to process that)

Takeda and Frost both latch onto her as well, taking her under their wing and being the bad influence every older sibling should be. Within a week of knowing them, baby girl has pulled three pranks (one of which dyed Hanzo's hair bright pink) and shows no signs of slowing down. Takeda and Frost are very proud.

Generally, I think she'd have a decently normal childhood except for all the kombat training and superpowers.

But if Kuai Liang is the one suddenly caring for a girl, depends on where in the timeline it happens, I'm gonna go with it happening after he and Hanzo have made peace (but I have so many headcanons for how it works at other points in the timeline someone pls ask me about them, give me an excuse to ramble I BEG):

He's on a mission when he finds a baby crying on the doorstep of the safehouse he's using, with a note explaining that she is a cryomancer and needs to be protected. Understandably, he's a little suspicious at how anyone knew he was here, but resolves to figure it out another day.

Literally the moment she looks at him, he's gone, that baby girl is his new reason for living and he would do anything for her, 0-60 in no time flat just absolutely ride or die.

He names her after his mother

Kuai Liang brings her back with him to the Lin Kuei and she becomes the clan's best kept secret, not a Word of her existence gets out bc Kuai Liang is understandably worried that someone will try to take her (that note was pretty suspicious after all), and everyone in the clan is just instantly smitten. Frost in particular declares herself baby Ru's protector. If Kuai Liang isn't holding her, Frost is.

Hanzo comes to the temple for an impromptu alliance meeting, kinda worried bc they weren't scheduled to meet for a week and then just sees Kuai Liang with a baby in his arms and short circuits (is also hit with some Horrendous baby fever because jesus Kuai Liang looks good with a baby, fucking hell)

Hanzo is the only person Kuai Liang trusts that has had a kid before (look, we love Johnny, but man cannot keep a secret to save his life) so naturally Kuai Liang called him for help.

Hanzo is also enchanted by baby Ru from the moment he holds her and helps Kuai Liang set up a proper nursery, get everything he needs, and volunteers himself for babysitting duty whenever needed. He and Frost end up making peace solely because of baby Ru.

Hanzo also ends up moving into the Lin Kuei temple for a couple months (he still does go check on his own clan, he's basically just taking a leave of absence) and helps Kuai Liang learn how to parent. They take turns going to settle her when she wakes up in the middle of the night, that way at least one of them gets some sleep.

That's how they end up getting together, Hanzo has to go back to the Shirai Ryu for a week and when he comes back Kuai Liang is exhausted and running on fumes as he hands baby Ru over, kissing Hanzo with a mumbled thank you, and then shuffling off to bed.

If they both end up suddenly looking after a little girl:

They're on a mission post-Kronika being defeated (in an AU where the timeline didn't get reset bc fuck that), and they find one of Shang Tsung's labs that he rebuilt after escaping Kronika's void.

It's a new version of the flesh pits pretty much and in it he's made clones of all the various defenders, but not clones of just one at a time, like he mixes the DNA of two or more defenders together to make a kid. (Think laura from the xmen)

Every defender basically gets a new kid (Kitana, Liu Kang, and Kung Lao have an understandably Wild set of reactions to that which I will Happily ramble about given the opportunity) and that includes Hanzo and Kuai Liang who's DNA was mixed to create a little girl who is about ten when they find her (that's as far as Shang Tsung could speed up the aging process, all these kids look about ten but none actually are)

She's got Hanzo's temper and Kuai Liang's stubbornness so it's a bit of a rocky start, especially since she is so confused about the situation, but once she gets settled, she warms up to them pretty quickly.

They take her to the Shirai Ryu bc Kuai Liang understandably has some negative associations with a child that age being within the walls of the Lin Kuei temple.

She's absolutely unhinged and wild, just no sense of decorum. When she's bored, she will just Leave and go hide in the woods so at least one person must have eyes on her at all times (Hanzo briefly considers a backpack leash but Kuai Liang immediately shoots him down.

She's also shockingly talented at Kombat, which Kuai Liang is very concerned by and he tries to give her some constructive hobbies to balance her out, like painting. She takes to it quite well, but also really enjoys drawing quite spooky things so its a mixed bag.

She and Frost are always either the best of friends or at each other's throats there is no in between. Hanzo is worried by how often they throw knives at each other but Kuai Liang and Bi-Han did the same so he's not very concerned by that.

Takeda finds her unsettling at first (partly because he wasn't introduced to her before he stumbled across her in the woods, cooking and eating a rat she had killed bc she got bored.

They end up getting along fine once the situation is explained, but that was quite a shock.

When she's fifteen she joins the Lin Kuei officially, bc that is the youngest Kuai Liang will allow her to be when she joins and trains with them full time.

Eventually, Frost takes over as grandmaster and baby girl becomes the next Sub-Zero, the two becoming a deadly team as Takeda becomes grandmaster of the Shirai Ryu

Lemme know if you want more, bc I can do more

[peachymilkandcream]

Written In Blood|Part 4|Modern Yandere Levi x Evelyn

(A/N: Compared to my other Yandere's Levi's obsession takes a whole different vibe. He is on something else and I'm totally here for it. Comment to be added to the taglist!)

WARNINGS: implied noncon/dubcon, graphic descriptions of violence, domestic violence, manipulation, mind breaking, yandere behaviour/themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, misogyny, mentions of child abuse, etc.

===============================================

Levi couldn't hide his look of smugness as he sat down across from Evelyn. The poor thing stared at him with wide-eye horror, absolutely appalled that she had just divulged sensitive information to the defense. It was the look that Levi loved to see every single day. The look that they knew how fucked they were against his iron defense.

As each of the prosecutors showed their evidence, Levi got to peek further into the life of this mysterious woman who had been writing all of his darkest fantasies onto paper. What she decorated like, if she was neat or messy, even down to what her schedule was. All things that normally would take weeks to figure out, all presented to him with the ability to take notes as he so pleased.

It was a solid case, clearly they thought that this would be cut and dry, a conviction a natural occurrence. What sane person could poke holes in their immense strategy and overwhelming evidence?

They had never met him.

"Your Honor, I know you and the jury must think that this case is all complete and wrapped up in a bow." He stands and makes broad gestures, always finding that when he looks more sophisticated than he really is the jury is more inclined to listen to him.

He takes a moment to smile at Evelyn before continuing. "However, I have eyewitness statements that the prosecutor admittedly does not keep her doors locked and has a habit of blurting things out that are untrue."

Evelyn stands, a look of anger crossing her face. "You're twisting that!"

"Am I?" He turns to the jury. "I'd like to call your attention to the screen, I had approached Ms. Glass for a discussion when she admitted to these things. Unfortunately for her, I was recording it the whole time."

Audio plays, unmistakably Evelyn's voice crackles out, further solidifying Levi's claims, there was no mistaking that Evelyn had just admitted to the court that she was unreliable as a witness and that all of this was more than likely her own doing.

"So as you can see ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have reason to believe, that Ms. Glass here completely fabricated this entire story after my client entered the apartment innocently to enquire about loud noises he had heard. Strictly to ensure Ms. Glass' safety, and yet she has accused him of a horrendous and life ending crime. I rest my case."

Levi was always blunt, straight to the point, and never carried on. His charm and confidence always won him over. He was a untouchable figure that no one would dare come against. A man of power and prestige, he was king of the world.

===============================================

Evelyn said very little after her stalker was found not guilty, it was the obvious outcome after the presenting of Levi's evidence, but still it felt like she wasn't ready to accept that he would walk away free. Eventually she would come to grips.

Deciding not to rub salt in her fresh wounds Levi didn't try and stop her as she quickly left the courtroom, but he didn't miss her tears. Poor thing.

What he was interested in was her lawyer friend, a shit one at that. But she had a pretty enough face, an alright body, she would do. This would be the key to getting into Evelyn's social circles.

"I must commend you on your efforts. Don't beat yourself up, that was a tough case."

She seems annoyed at first, but he knew the look when she met his eyes. The anger of defeat, stomped down by a pang of attraction. Levi was devastating to anyone.

"It's fine, I just feel bad for her."

"I'm sure she'll survive. But you on the other hand, I've never seen you in the legal world."

"I mostly keep to Evelyn, I don't really do many other clients." She extends a hand, trying to be graceful. "Petra Ral, nice to meet you."

He smiles and takes it, excitement sparking in his eyes. "A pleasure. Listen. Do you want to get out of here? Discuss the case more?"

"I don't know if I should, prosecution and defense and all that."

"Oh please, the trial is over, there's no reason two attractive people can't go get a drink after a long day's work."

A slight blush. "I suppose you're right, one drink couldn't hurt."

Another smile as he takes her hand. "Then what are we waiting for?"

[weaselbeaselpants]

Lily, I did/do agree with you on some fandom takes, especially back during the DownWithMolestia days. Heck I agree with a lot of your takes in current year. Even if I agreed with you on everything you say I'd still fucking drop you and hope every single one of your fans wakes up and does so to for the right reasons --that you're a predator/lying abuser, not that you hate Gay Rocks in Space-- too.

Like, you wanna hear proof some folks' who I not only liked but REALLY like their videos and still absolutely think are in the wrong?

JonTron and Brad Jones.

I still find myself quoting their damn videos every now and again because god damnit that shit is/was funny, sue me. I loved CinemaSnob especially and god JonTron's videos were so much fun.

Too bad JonTron said some of the worst, most horrendously antiblack shit I've ever heard and has never fucking apologized for it or even BEGUN to have an iDubbz moment. I believe Pewdiepie feels+understands what he did was wrong more than JonTron and that's a bad sign. Jon was funny, a white person. Don't care. I'm never going to follow anything he makes again because the stuff he had to say was heinous and no it doesn't just "go away" because another white yter is in trouble for this kind of thing or it's been so many years since his 'canceling' and 'doesn't matter'. Really?

CinemaSnob is less racist (publicly) but he showed his true colors by publicly choosing to stay with his toxic friends and showing he was a two-sided jerk, and then made up lies about doxxing and harassment just to sweeten the deal. What he did (while roping Double Toasted in no less) was straight up admit that he doesn't care about any of the shit leveled at Channel Awesome, even after CA themselves admitted to hiding a sexual predator, because "he'd still have a career" even after he hurt anybody. Say all you want about any yter, breadtube or whatever, being callous and 'uncaring' or blocking ppl that just disagree w them- "apologize even if you don't mean it = dumb", "Logan Paul filmed a dead body and he still has a career", it's that side you showed of yourself, Brad, that is always going to make me actually genuinely hate myself for quoting your old videos or seeing you show up in an old Phelan or Allison vid.

Whether it be personally or politically, you can look like an ass and even the biggest fans of your work are gonna be shaken up and drop you for it-- to which you'll probably say they were never really "your REAL fans" for being "sensitive" w really it's just people having independence and critical thinking.

I would not be the person I am now if I didn't disagree/look into the drama buzzing around my personal fav yters like Lindsay Ellis and Jenny Nicholson with an open mind. I know (of, not rlly know) these women and their careers and the points where they were definitely getting harassment and if there's any credible basis for shitty behavior they've done - no matter how I feel about their work, I DON'T want to defend it just because I have this parasocial comfortzone in their essays. I don't want to entertain hate campaigns and lolcow farmers, I want to always do my due diligence and genuinely know "wait wtf did 'x' say about 'x'." In the case of folks like Ellis or PanPizza or Quinton Reviews here's usually always some degree of nuance or-"yes soandso isn't a [thing I thought they were cuz of drama I saw], but I'm personally allowed to not like them bcuz of how they handled these accusations"-vibes. Valid asf. That's me with some of the people I watch, like Wendigoon. It's fine.

In the cases of JonTron, Brad Jones, Emily Youcis and now Lily Orchard....no. Fuck this. I'm an adult and it's not the quality of your work you make whatsoever, it's all about your personality. If you are shitty and vile, possibly even criminal (hate speech should count as criminal, Youcis) and you don't even begin to care that you are any of those things...yeah why should I give you the time of day or treat your work like it's different from you as a person?

[elkkiel]

ELKKIE MY LOVE

imagine dad iv is a volunteer coach for flora's soccer team and all the other moms are down so horrendously bad for him. he's so kind, supportive of the girls, and not to mention ATHLETIC and GOOD LOOKING. they know he's divorced, but none of them can possibly imagine why any woman would leave that perfect man, especially seeing how good he is with his daughter. they all assume he's single (no ring, they only see him and flora together, etc.) and a couple of them try to seduce him on more than one occassion. then one game III shows up dressed in full team colors to obnoxiously cheer for this youth soccer game (i'm thinking flora's like. 10-12), walking straight up to him and planting the sloppiest kiss on his lips (he had to let these ladies know that he is not available 👍)

anyways lunch break is over i must pretend to be normal🫡

Sure, the moms show up to practice for their kids, but that's not what has their attention most of the time. They'll sit together with their little camp chairs and totally-not-travel-wine-tumblers to... observe and discuss how well the coach is doing with their kids. It drives them absolutely wild to watch him lift up the hem of his shirt to wipe sweat off his forehead, or to see how gentle he is with the kids when they fall and scuff up their knees.

I'm all for a hot mom feeling herself lol, so I love the visual of these older women fawning all over Ivy during breaks and after practice. They'll show up in low-cut shirts in the team colours, find every excuse to talk about their "kid's performance" with the coach, and make sure they get in a little squeeze on his bicep or forearm.

Occasionally, some of the married moms will have their husbands tag along, but this means the dads catch onto what exactly has the ladies so enraptured on the field. Poor Ivy has had to deal with a dad or two puffing up their chests at him, jealous that their wives seemed a little toooo interested in meeting with the coach. He's able to shut them down politely, but they always leave with their tail tucked between their legs and a wife who's somehow even redder in the face than before.

Despite their efforts, Ivy never fails to be anything but friendly and professional with the moms. It's soooooo frustrating when none of their tactics seem to stick, and they'll scheme with each other on the best way to get a piece of that hot dad ass. He's single(?) and they're practically throwing themselves at him, so why isn't anything working?

And that's where our lovely III comes in. He easily worms his way into the mom group when he shows up to watch practice one day (he gives me vibes that he would be oddly good with that type of crowd. the pink whitney shooters he sneaks in with him also help to endear him to the ladies). They're all too eager to include him in their antics, if a tad confused as to why/who he's here for. After an hour and juuuust a bit of liquid confidence, the ladies "manage" to egg him on to make a move on the coach.

He goes along with their nudges and "wanna do something ~baaad~? 🤭🤭" attitude, finally getting up and approaching the coach while the moms watch and giggle in the background. III's such a little tease and they can smell the fruit salad on him from a mile away; while they're certain he won't make it any further than they've gotten, at least it'll be fun to watch their new friend strut his stuff.

IV is turning around to grab some water after chatting with a couple of the kiddos, and he looks up to see III sauntering over. III's got cheesiest, most mischievous little grin plastered all over his face, but it melts into something so fond and happy when he makes eye contact with his boy. IV visibly lights up and jogs over to close the distance, lightly holding III by his waist as IV smiles up at him. Subtly (not so subtly) turning them a bit so the moms get a clear view, III makes a show of gently grabbing IV's face with both hands, leaning down, and planting the fattest smooch on those pretty lips of his.

IV pulls away after a couple seconds, blushing and looking over his shoulder to make sure none of the kids saw (they totally did, and are currently making exaggerated gagging noises and shrieking in the background). He has to get back on the field after their water break is over, so he gives III a quick kiss on the cheek before turning around to resume practice. Before IV has the chance to jog off, III gives him a light smack on the butt and blows him a kiss when IV briefly whips around to give him a scolding (playfully) look.

III makes sure to throw a smug glance and wink over his shoulder to the moms, heading off to IV's minivan to grab snacks and water for Flora after practice. The ladies can't help but stare at him in awe as he walks away with a proud little swing in his hips, their jaws practically hitting the ground at both this new development and III's shameless audacity.

They're jealous, don't get me wrong. But, while he's away, the moms are scheming on how to get just one or twl more shooters in him. You know, so he can gossip on aaaallll those juicy details about their pretty little coach

[loveislandthegame]

thoughts on today's volume! first off, let me say i really, realllllly hope that the next season doesn't have horrible couples acting like children at the finale 😭 hazel & hari were ruining the vibe . i gave FB props for not making her a villain, but i'm rescinding that now because they made both her and hari look absolutely ridiculous. it's astounding how much they manage to ruin their own characters. now let's get into the rest of it

FB you better be joking ! i've lost count of how many times they've used this box. at this point the feather is crusty, the silk is shattering, the massage lotion got bacteria in it, the whipped cream can is squirting out straight up nitrous oxide, etc.

i don't know what's more horrendous , the glitched massage oil overlay or this dress . what in the penny, nickel, dime is this ??

when i picked castle ruins for the final date i was envisioning like, a cute grassy hill with rocks scattered around, overlooking the sea . cute romantic vibes ... only for that shit to end up being a brick wall 😭 it's still a cute background though, and the date was nice

FB, where's my damn suit ! (i know i'm probably the only person that wants one but like, even the queen herself, s2 MC, had a suit option at prom) i ended up going with the black dress, which was a good shout because it actually looks really good with claudia . we're giving sun and moon 🌚🌞 <3

of course we won, but with the way this season's been going i wouldn't have been surprised if we somehow had a tie with sienna (i know it's not possible though because she gets dumped if you aren't wlw. if you're wondering about the ranking it was 4th: hazel/hari 3rd: sienna/kyle 2nd: bea/theo)

before going outside MC had a conversation with claudia's mother, and i loved this. minus the land part, this is the kinda shit i'd want as gifts IRL

when i tell you i groaned out loud when i saw who the VIP guest was. also, during the recap of our villa journey i have no clue why he was acting like i chose to be with jin in the recoupling prior the final one, did FB forget it was boy's choice ? (the AI is AI-ing girl...)

spin the block...? You can’t be talking like that White Baby

FB really screwed over the people who were romancing finn, i'm actually gagged . granted i think you're a bit delulu if you picked love instead of money with anybody besides lulu , but finn actually was an LI option. this is worse than hamish getting with ivy, i genuinely wanna know wtf were they thinking

the diamond scene with finn was the least robotic conversation this whole season, perhaps the misogynistic creeps that wrote season 5 came back to write that pile of bullshit. don't bother buying it. if you really wanna know: finn got back with kat, they tried to have an open relationship and it flopped

is he an option to run away with or what? i don't know because i slammed the tf out of the "i'm in a relationship" option 👹

love or money time, and i picked love of course ! i would say we walked off into the sunset but it's already night time

next week's volume is gonna be a reunion and ... ugh 😐 respectfully, they should've just pulled the plug here . at this point the only other islanders i care about are bea & theo, but after the final recoupling they pretty much became nonexistent (and knowing FB, this reunion is probably gonna be dedicated to helping one of these wack ass couples fix their relationship drama ...)

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

feeling tender in this chilis will you tell us what ur styles find most attractive or love the most about each other or even what they find the most endearing, my dear? <3

My darlingest, Absofuckinglutely!!!

Dude I have a million AU’s, but all across the board? Stan and Kyle are SO RIDICULOUSLY IN LOVE!!! Even before they knew it, they were. I’ll always deliver the Tenderness. And u know my styles are pretty consistent across every universe, so these STAY true:

Starting with what Stan loves about Kyle emotionally? His PASSION!!! Kyle cares SO MUCH about EVERYTHING. And everyone. He sometimes gets carried away, and Stan will be silently smiling while trying to cool the fire down, because he adores it but like damn Ky you don’t need to get this worked up over the gas station clerk’s struggle with his kid? It’s so cute to him tho.

Similarly, my Kyles are some of the most empathetic people you ever did see. He just senses things about people and his first impressions? They’re usually right. If Kyle gets a Bad Vibe from someone, that’s a good sign to steer clear. When Stan isn’t sure what to think of a new person, Kyle is, and tells him with no hesitation. He’s so instinctual in general and can diffuse a bad situation at the drop of a hat. If he doesn’t get too riled up lmao. He just KNOWS. And he’s so trustworthy too, like you need someone for something? Kyle. He’s very self aware for the most part and stays on top of what’s going on mentally, but when he lets loose? Stan is just gazing in wonder at his firecracker of a sbf in absolute love.

On Kyle’s side of things: dude Stan is the sweetest human being on the face of the planet. Where Kyle is a fighter, Stan is a LOVER. He is so vocal about the things and people he loves, and he’s really protective of them! (Where Ky is a Defender, Stan is a Protector) Stanley Marsh my sweet loverboy and he tries SO hard to perform these sweeping romantic gestures and it’s even more endearing when he fails (unfortunately he is indeed kind of a loser) but is so cute oh my goddddd like ok king try to serenade your bf and slip on the ice and smile that soft smile when he helps you up.

When he takes a stand on something he is FULLY into it. Another thing u know about my Stans is that he’s ALWAYS vegetarian and that will never change bc he LOVES animals. And if he randomly brings home a stray cat (hi Moose) Kyle cannot say no because dammit Stan is already so attached and he looks so cute making those Eyes at you and his love of all creatures great and small is so precious!!! And Kyle, who thrives on passion, really really likes to see Stan get so stoked about that kind of thing. Stan is also such a dork and he WILL infodump about fob’s discography or lotr it’s so cute!

On that previous note, Kyle likes validation. His love language is words of affirmation. And Stan gets stoked about Kyle, and he will not hesitate to express it!

So, physically, ohhhhh boy I may need to chill with the hcs because I absolutely have too many. Starting on that with Stanley Down Bad Marsh and his adoration of Kyle:

Stan 100% absolutely has a thing for Kyle’s hair. Kyle hates his hair for a lot of the time growing up but Stan LOVES IT!!! Out here mega down horrendous and going “kyyyyy take your hat off I’m sad” and Kyle folds bc when Stan’s feelin down he is so comforted by a mass of red curls and he has indeed cried one of the times Ky cut it short (this may or may not be the reason ojv Kyle has shoulder length hair)

While I do have some Tall Kyles out there, most of them are on the shorter side, and all my Stans are Big Boys. And Stan very much enjoys the size difference. He LOVES picking Kyle up, feeling like a knight in shining armor (my Stans are PROTECTORS FR) and just holding him oh my god he gets so excited when Kyle actually LETS him! (Oh wow what a surprise I’m turning this into OJV hc hour) so OrangeJuiceVerse Kyle is 5’7 and like maybe 130 soaking wet, Stan loves to just snag him lmao Ky may get insecure abt his size sometimes but Stan’s gonna love it he genuinely thinks it’s so cute

His FRECKLES! Bruh every Kyle I’ve written has beautiful faint freckles EVERYWHERE and Stan will be connecting them like constellations. Most of his features are sharp and pointed and like something out of an elven fantasy and then there’s the freckles and hair that juxtaposition omg stan is enthralled.

Kyle is JUST as enthralled with Stan! He is a classically HANDSOME dude like this guy looks like a disney prince and his eyes are the prettiest shade of deep blue you’ve ever seen! Kyle may not get distracted as easily as his counterpart, but he’s staring into those eyes and spacing out. And oh my god directly to jail for Kyle bc when Stan’s got his arms out, it is SO over for him!!! Like ok ATLCTS headcanon one time smokejumper Stan and fae prince Kyle were at the Stenny Apartment once Ky figured out how to pass as human and Stan took his hoodie off and he was wearing a tank top underneath and that sweet vegan firefighting king is built! And Kyle sees the burn scars and is reminded of how much Stan cares about the forests and yep that was the first time they did ~activities~ smh but same, wood nymph Ky, I have a crush on ATLCTS Stan as well

It’s worth noting that most of my Kyles are somewhere on the ace spectrum too. But Stan Marsh exists, is built for hugs, and is the hottest guy in the universe to him.

Thank you so much for the ask my love I love to talk about the boys and how much they are simping <3

[bearimba]

Kris (Pokemon Crystal/HGSS) Character Headcanons

And last but certainly not least, it's time for the third of the New Bark Town kids, Kris! (just to be clear btw, I kidnapped her from Crystal (the game) and threw her into HGSS because she deserves love too)

Anyways, here's my list of headcanons for her:

Her name is actually Crystal, she just goes by Kris because she likes it better (she spells it with a K because when they were kids, Ethan said it was "cooler" and she thought it was amusing so it stuck)

Her pokemon are Furret, Dunsparce, Slowpoke, and Tauros.

She's friends (tired older sibling vibes) with Ethan and Lyra, but because of her position as one of Elm's research assistants, she doesn't get to hang out with them nearly as much as they do with each other.

She's four years older than Lyra and Ethan more or less, making her about 20 by the time HGSS rolls around.

She's super chill most of the time but can be incredibly dry and sarcastic and sometimes brutally honest. Despite this she's genuinely and openly supportive of her loved ones a lot and would probably kill for them. Unfortunately for them, she's also not afraid to turn her fury on them too if necessary. Sometimes tough love is valid if your friends are risking their lives by being idiots :D

She's already been on her own journey when she was around 13-14, during which she managed to get most of the badges and dominated the Battle Tower (which has expanded into the Battle Frontier by the time HGSS rolls around. She likes to visit from time to time when she needs to blow off steam). She probably could've gotten all of the badges if she hadn't gotten bored of travelling.

She likes to battle “just for fun”

She takes over the lab from Elm, though it doesn't happen until he's basically forced to retire (the man loves his work, ok?). He still hangs around though especially since his home is literally on the second floor.

“oh haha looks like I won (again)! great battle tho :D don’t worry maybe you’ll get it next time <3 btw here's a comprehensive list of everything you could've done better” meanwhile the opponent’s team is absolutely decimated. dust in the wind. reduced to scorch marks on the ground

Where Lyra depends more on flexibility and Ethan just kinda does whatever during battles, Kris uses a lot more strategy. She's able to come up with plans on how to defeat an opponent team even if she's never seen their team before thanks to her extensive knowledge of pokemon. However! if her plans happen to get knocked off track, it's much easier to overpower her team.

She also specializes in evolution, but instead of focusing on breeding like he did, she's more interested in requirement-based evolution (like why some pokemon will remain in their first stage of evolution despite being old enough/having the experience to evolve. or why some pokemon need certain items to evolve. or why some pokemon evolve with trading. stuff like that. it's definitely a wide field but she enjoys the variety a lot).

She has this habit of flicking people's heads if she's annoyed with them. Light flick? she's being lighthearted. Painful flick? she's actually upset. Oftentimes she'll flick herself if she's particularly stumped on something, usually to do with her research.

She owns a bicycle her parents bought from Goldenrod and takes it absolutely everywhere---girl could probably ride across the entire region if she wanted to.

Her pokegear is horrendously outdated, and the screen is so cracked it's a miracle it still works. Regardless, she refuses to get a new one because "it turns on just fine."

She typically just wears whatever clothes are comfortable/convenient. She also mends all her clothing until it's unsalvageable and she's even made a couple pieces herself. For example, her white jacket is just a lab coat she cut short and upgraded. She tried to teach her friends but Ethan would start loudly complaining about being bored after two seconds and Lyra couldn't sit still long enough to learn anything past basic mending. Silver is the only one she's had any luck with, but even then it's far from his favorite activity (they'll still save their sewing projects until they can meet up and gossip together).

She has the worst handwriting known to mankind, but she still insists on scribbling everything down herself. It's like a rite of passage for every new researcher to try and decipher her notes well enough to transpose them into the lab's computer system.

Her love language is sending pictures to her friends. except. most of the time it'll be motion-blurred pics of random pokemon or the world's most incomprehensible memes

[eriexplosion]

I've been super excited to get to Metamorphosis

I absolutely love this Alien-esque intro, the shot of the ruined ship, and the pan over the interior while there's screaming in the distance, seeing the single survivor running through the corridors trying to escape before he gets dragged out of sight to a surely gruesome death? God this is PEAK HORROR BEATS.

Speaking of horror, forgot we meet Hemlock this episode. This man's ABSOLUTELY HORRENDOUS VIBES. I really want to know more about his history with Nala Se, where he got a whole clone assistant, what is going ON here?

"What was done on Kamino was unfortunate" UNFORTUNATE? MILDLY UNFORTUNATE THE WHOLE DESTRUCTION OF YOUR ENTIRE PLANET THING.

I'm still very surprised that they took Lama Su off planet because he seems quite useless to the operation but you know, good thing for Hemlock that they did.

Cid really gave them zero time before being like DESPERATE to send them on another job, like I said I think that the Empire has been on Ord Mantell the whole time and she's trying to keep them from coming back, starting with giving them more jobs and eventually switching to reverse psychology DEMANDING they come back while threatening, knowing it would put them off.

I love Wrecker looking excited by each increasing and then frowning when he sees Hunter not reacting, he's just always a huge delight.

"HOW HARD COULD SCAVENGING CARGO BE?" <- Things said only before almost dying while scavenging cargo

Wrecker's weapons knowledge extending beyond just explosives is a fun detail, he seems delighted by the electrostaff

"Whoever did this wasn't human" Hunter real quick do you remember what franchise you're in? I get the vibe they were going for but 'wasn't human' covers a HUGE RANGE OF THINGS INCLUDING A LARGE PORTION OF PEOPLE.

Splitting Tech off on his own had me WORRIED AS FUCK the first time I watched this. Now I think it just gives a good look at how he could operate on his own post Plan 99.

Omega's cloning knowledge <3 she's SO SMART

I do not approve of the goo

THE SHOT OF BABY ZILLO SLURPING UP THE ARM. I THINK IT'S A DROID ARM BUT STILL.

I'm still. OBSESSED with Tech finding the zillo beast and immediately going FASCINATING :O

Survival is secondary to COOL CREECHUR

IT ATE THE CREW? god Omega bby, she is SO UPSET.

Tech realizing just how big this thing is going to get is amazing. You must not let it get near the power grid! Unfortunate.

I LOVE this shot

Also the shot of Tech SPINNING OMEGA OUT OF THE FIREBALLS WAY

Obsessed with how the zillo beast plot never TRULY resolves it just gets put off for another time.

This entire village getting rounded up.... I have the unfortunate feeling that no one is ever seeing them again.

ECHO AND REX MENTION

I love how Hemlock is instantly established as just The Worst despite him doing nothing in this episode, just his vibes are THAT rancid.

[rylanenthusiast]

the quarry counsellors having a disney karaoke night :D pt. 1

jacob’s first up to break the ice and he SOLOS “you’re welcome” and you KNOW it. he goes full out no shame 10/10 energy and everyone hypes him the fuck up.

dylan’s feeling the hype so he comes up with a solo of “i won’t say i’m in love”, really playing up the damsel in denial here, his acting is off the charts and he has this smug grin the entire song looking at ryan. ryan’s rolling his eyes but deep down he’s melting. he love this absolute idiot.

everyone’s laughing and kaitlyn rolls her eyes, dylan beckons her up onto the stage and they do a duet of love is an open door. kaitlyn starts off reluctant, but she gets REAL fucking into it- everyone’s losing it because well, lesbian and a gay man singing a love song? yes. dylan is anna, kaitlyn is hans.

dylan then gets off the stage and hands the mic to nick, trying to get him to have a go- he’s nervous af and jacob notices so he takes the mic and pulls nick up- they sing “can you feel the love tonight” and honestly, the way nick and jacob get into it with those awful high notes is horrendously perfect. jacob is timon, nick is pumba.

after much laughter and complaints, emma snatches the mic and does a “mother knows best” solo. now, emma. emma is a theatre kid- she can SING, and she can ACT. the entire room is dead silent in awe at this broadway performance- abi is dying because of the milf vibes.

now ryan, ryan’s not getting away with sitting there all silent- dylan then pulls him on stage, and the poor boy is begging for his life. dylan whispers something to him and ryan just goes soft- they do a duet to “i see the light”, and ryan eventually forgets the others are in the room because he’s just entranced by dylan, so he gets into it and everyone is shocked by how gorgeous his voice is. when the song finishes they’re both blushing messes from everyone’s comments. dylan is rapunzel and ryan is eugene.

[gabby-i-guess]

ADHD PSA #3: Bath time 🛀

So I just moved into a new house, and for whatever reason, the gremlins living in my brain have decided that the new shower has ‼️BAD VIBES‼️ and therefore will only agree to let me have a shower when ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. I've been trying to figure out ways to bribe them into liking the shower, so here are a few ways I've tried to make my shower ADHD accessible.

1) DIY waterproof phone holder

Yes I know I sound like an iPad kid, but if having an audiobook/music/YouTube video playing while I shower lets me shower, I'm ok with that.

All you do is take a sturdy ziplock bag, pop your phone and a large bull clip inside, and zip it up tight (give it a lil squeeze to make sure there are no gaps). Now you can clip the bag onto your shower caddy from the inside, or another ledge or something (get creative), and voila - your phone stays totally dry and you stay entertained. You can even somewhat use your phone through the plastic, so you can change songs etc. When you're done, unclip the unopened bag, take it to a dry place, and you can open it and take your phone out there.

Here's a photo for demo:

2) Sort your shit out

Personally, I get super overwhelmed by all the steps in self-care tasks, including but not limited to showers. Routines like that involve like 10 steps that call on skills ADHDers really struggle with, like decisions, organisation, memory, executive functioning, and planning. So I've made things as simple as they can possibly be for me.

I have 4 little baskets in my cupboard for each of my regular routines:

morning (with makeup, sunscreen, moisturiser, and deoderant)

evening (with vitamin C serum, makeup wipes, pimple patches, and floss)

regular shower (with antibacterial soap, shampoo, conditioner, leave in conditioner, and a hair brush)

and ✨fancy shower✨ (with a razor, shaving cream, nice smelling soap, body moisturiser, curl cream, and a candle)

Now I can just yank out whatever basket I want and use whatever is in it on autopilot. Then, when I'm done, I can dump it all back into the basket and shove it all back into the cupboard. This method reduces how overwhelmed I get by so goddamn much that my fucking dentist commented on the noticeable improvement in my teeth, because I had actually consistently had the energy to floss. And when you're consistently flossing - well, it's only up from here baby 😎

3) DIY bath

The sensory experience of showering can be truly horrendous. And while I can't fix a lot of it, I can at least make it a little less... much. Yk?

So here's my solution:

Yup.

I got myself a blow up pool.

For my shower.

I am officially the coolest person alive.

This baby was $10 at Kmart, and is 80cm wide and 18cm deep - basically, cross your legs and it will not quite cover your thighs. To provide a little more insulation and some padding, I also popped an old towel under the pool. It's really not much, but it means I can sit down in comfortably warm water and splish-splosh myself clean. As opposed to showering, which (especially in a large bathroom/shower like I have now) is alternately way too cold and way too hot, way too loud, way too (I literally don't know how else to say it) "fast", way too out of control (so much splashing and water going everywhere, UGH), and just kinda generally way too much.

A bonus perk: I can finally use some nice pink bubble bath bombs from last Christmas 🥰🥰

I really hope one of these tips helps one of you out there. Keeping yourself clean is one of those "basics" that neurotypical/mentally well people don't realise is actually really hard.

You are doing a truly awesome job, and I'm truly, truly proud of you. Sending you love and warm, clean, sudsy thoughts ❤️