#the vet was like ‘hes the first nice cat ive had in like two days everyone else has tried to maul me’

[opiumvampire]

mad bc he wanted rabies really bad but i made him get the vaccine anyway

[echoalyssa]

hello! Can we get a part two of this ask? Thx! “Hey, sorry to bother you but I was wondering if I could make a request for Jaden Hossler or Chase Hudson where he cheats on the reader cause he thinks him she is cheating on him when she's actually planning a surprise b-day party or something like that...”

Authors Note: After like a year long wait... here it is! A warning, I am into veterinary terminology but I am not certified and this information and order of events may be incorrect. I apologize in advance if it is. This is part two but can probably be read as a standalone. I have linked part one below!

Read part one HERE

It's been two long years away from Chase. At first it felt like the end of the world. You'd laid on your bedroom floor unable to move. It had felt like your heart was being held in an iron first. The breakup had broken you... until it hadn't.

It was true what they said, time heals all. It had taken longer than. you had expected, the whole thing was public. Even months after the videos released there were still edits and DM's and YouTube videos about the split. People monitored that type of thing, when you had unfollowed him they had noticed immediately and it was blown out of proportion.

Now though, two years later, you had moved out of LA and into Murfreesboro Tenessee, a much smaller town that allowed your healing to complete.

You had deleted all social media, gotten a regular job at a regular animal shelter and basically fallen off the face of the earth.

It was nice, just being able to focus on the animals and the gym. You were living for yourself and yourself only.

It was funny though, you'd changed your phone number but even before that most people dropped you. They had chosen to stay out of the drama completely rather than take sides.

After all this time, you couldn't say that you hated him. Even after what he did to you. You had done the same thing back anyway. Occasionally you would think about him, but it was a brief fleeting thought before you were losing yourself in a book instead.

Well... until today.

It's storming hard and the dogs are howling. Most of them scared of the thunder. You're running around checking that the dogs are safely locked into their kennels. The last thing you needed was one of them getting out.

It was being busy like this that really helped you. Several of the staff had called off, opting to stay out of the storm. You didn't call off for anything though.

You make it out of the dog sector and start to cross the lobby to the cats.

Halfway though, the front door to the shelter busts open.

"Help! Somebody help me!"

The voice makes you freeze in your tracks, you know that voice. How could you ever forget?

You turn slowly and there he is.

His hair is plastered to his forehead because of the rain. He's filled out more and he looks taller. He's in a short sleeve t-shirt so you can see that his tattoo sleeve is finally finished. His eyes are still just as mesmerizing as before.

He's holding a dog in his arms, the front of his shirt soaked in blood. The dog is limp and you can see that his leg is not facing the direction it should be.

"Please. Nowhere else is open. I found-"

He freezes because he's recognized you.

You'd changed your hair color, grown it out, and were decked out in shelter gear and rainbows but he knows it's you.

You choose to help the dog first, surging forward to take the dog out of his arms. Your fingers touch his arm and he inhales sharply.

The shelter vet had already gone home for the day but you were trained in pain management, splints and tourniquets.

You shove the two double doors to the clinic room open, laying the dog on the table.

He follows your worriedly.

You turn to dig through a cabinet for all the supplies that you might need. An IV, a fluid bag, a vial of the pain medication.

This dog was going to bleed out if you didn't act fast.

Your first move is to administer the shot. You'd have to move his leg around a lot and it was going to be excruciating. It wasn't going to kick in immediately but it was better than nothing.

"Is he going to be okay? I got here as fast as I could!" He's hovering over you way too close for you to work.

You turn to face him, voice steadier than your heart.

"Chase." You pause to get his attention. "You need to let me work. Grab my phone and call Marcia. Tell her it is an emergency and I'm applying a tourniquet to stabilize him."

He nods, scrambling with the piece of technology. Having something to do seems to steady him somewhat and allows you to apply the tourniquet.

Lastly, you shave down the leg that would have to be operated on and insert an IV to hopefully hydrate him.

The meds have kicked in and the dog is beginning to fall asleep on the table.

"That's all I can do. Now he just has to wait for Marcia."

Chase doesn't respond so you turn to look at him.

He's staring at you.

"Its been so long." He says it as a statement so you don't respond, waiting for him to continue. "You dropped off the face of the earth."

Again, another statement.

He wrings his hands together nervously.

"I looked for you."

His words make something in your heart stir. You pause for a long while and then suddenly say, "Your shirt is trashed. We have some extra shelter volunteer shirts."

You walk away from him to search through the closet for them.

When you turn around with one in hand your mouth goes dry because he's pulling his shirt up and over his head and wow. He had certainly filled out. The muscles in his back ripple and you force yourself to look at his eyes instead.

You hand it to him and your fingertips brush again.

"How have you been?" His voice is almost a whisper.

There's no way to deny that this is a question not a statement and so you are forced to answer.

"Ive been good." It's a short answer considering everything.

He nods, cracking his knuckles.

"I missed you."

That one hurts.

"I never got to tell you how sorry I was. The snake I... you put a lot of thought into it and I never should have doubted you. You never gave me a reason to not trust you."

You nod. There was a lot of nodding going on in this conversation.

"I should have been better for you."

"It's okay." You finally say, your voice is barely above a whisper.

"It's not okay. Can you ever forgive me?"

"I forgave you a long time ago Chase."

Your words make him smile, almost too much.

"I want to try again."

You shake your head at this, "No, Chase. There's too much hurt and I gave that all up. The social media, the drama, that's not me anymore."

"I know!" He tells you, "That's okay. We'll make it work."

Except how would that work? He would have to give up his career or you would have to go back into the spotlight and that was not something that you wanted to do.

"I don't think I can Chase. I have a life here, I don't want to go back to how it was."

He steps forward, reaching for your arm and you pull away from him.

"Let's just start over then. Get to know each other as friends. I'm here on vacation anyway!"

"You're in Tennessee on vacation?" You ask skeptically.

"Well... I have a show in Nashville. My album is trending! I was driving through when I found the little guy."

Your heart is beating wildly and your head is telling you it's a bad idea but deep down in your heart you know you want to. So when Chase reaches out to shake your hand, you let him.

"Hi. My name is Chase. What's yours?"

"Y/N. Nice to meet you Chase."

[dunhoof]

pet death, disease

about two years ago we lost a foster kitten. it was a very harrowing experience, when tested we received a faint positive for a dangerous, infectious disease. at the time we had not only her four siblings and young mother in the house but six of our own inside and two we took care of outside. we sanitized every possibly infectious surface, completely got rid of multiple cat trees, steamed our carpets, took every piece of clothing and bedding we had used for months to a laundromat when our own washing machine couldn't keep up. we were almost certain her mother and siblings wouldn't survive long and all we could do was hope ours could. and then nothing happened. her siblings and mother were clear to go to their new homes, none of our cats showed any signs of being unwell, and we concluded that she had died of something else. after she died, while we were still so unsure of the safety of her family and ours, i sat at my computer like i always do when i don't have anything else. i don't know why i thought to, but i searched for a dragon that was born the same day she was. i found one, a tundra that was even black and white like her, and named it after her.

before then, i had not lost a pet since i was around 15-16. im 22 now and in the last five months, ive lost three. all three of them lived long, full, loved lives, and im happy theyre together and no longer in pain. for sydney back in august, i hatched an egg on on the day of his passing, following what i did for gracie in a way.

the last two were the pair we took care of outside, named mommy and baby tabby from when my step mother first found the former taking care of the latter as a kitten and assumed he was her mother. for several reasons - including the fact that even after living around and being fed by humans since she was very young, baby never once let anyone around her if she could help it - my step-mother and father elected to keep them outside while we had to. they were extremely bonded, baby tabby loved mommy more than anything and followed him around constantly. she’d let him eat her food if we didn’t stop him to make sure she ate too, she’d stay nearby while we were petting him even though she never got close, and when he passed back in october we took him an hour from the vet he was put to sleep at all the way home and back just to make sure she could see him one final time and hopefully understand he was gone.

she’s been doing poorly for awhile now and, without going into too much detail, the decision was made to put her to sleep this monday. today i came home from work to my father answering the door to tell me that she had passed. she’s wrapped in a blanket in the garage, curled up in the same bed we carried both sydney and mommy in after they passed. i pet her for the first time today.

the dragons i hatched for mommy three months ago and baby today both have taupe as their primary color. that’s the main thing i wanted to share, just about everything else has spilled out as i sat with her. it’s a nice, fitting color for both their tabby coats, and the fact that they somehow match feels incredible to me.

[huearmy]

The Smell of Truth - I

Summary: After years being forced to fight in clandestine hybrid ring, Jungkook is now living in shelter, but life remains bad, the place is abusive, and nobody seems to want adopt him. Until one night a pro-hybrid activist group invades the shelter, and a woman in black smelling like truth promises that things will get better, and he decides to follow her wherever she goes.

Pairing: pitbull!Jungkook x human!Reader

Genre: fluff, angst, future smut maybe.

Words: 3090

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: Light descriptions of violence, nothing much. For now. Jungkook is just a cute pie here ok dont touch me.

 Chapter II  Chapter III  Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII

gif is not mine

The gray walls of the silent shelter were cold as it were since day one, the bed was small and the blanket could be softer, from the window a yellow light of a light pole bringing the sensation of isolation. Not so different of the last home of Jungkook.

There were two main differences, though. First and more important, now he didn't need to fight to not die in the rings. And - he was thinking if it is good or not - for the first time in so long he could have a prospect of hope, after all, some people seemed interested in adopting him.

But all of them feared him too.

Some days he spend all his time thinking about how to improve his own image so that someone may want to take him home - trying the hardest to look good in his padronized white clothes, fixing is hair, and maintaining a good posture always. Other days he is just a damn pessimist, knowing that anyone will want a pitbull hybrid. But okay, so if they can't acept him with his disturbed past, he won't acept them neither. He want to be loved after all, high standars... Thats what he tells himself often.

Tonight he don't really care.

Like in his previous home he was going to bed feeling like trash, bones hurting like hell and taste of blood in his mouth. In the reflection on the window he could see the cut and swell in his lips and the hematoma below his left eye. Earlier he got beat up by the shelter's guards. They were four against one, and they had batons to hit and electrocute him. All of this just because he wanted to be alone in his corner and growled for another dog who was annoying him by pulling his tail, maybe they thought he was going to do something violent, but he wasn't. Despite his past, Jungkook hate fighting. And then he just tried to defend himself.

Hours passed and he couldn't sleep, something in his gut telling him he should be alert. The night watchman should've passed by his door ten minutes ago. But he heard nothing. He waited to hear the now familiar sound of the watchman's steps... But instead when the sound came it was of a lot more of feet hitting the ground, coming in his direction, and fast.

Suddenly the door of his room opened with a bang, a tall figure in all black and with a gun in it's belt looking at him from the door frame. 

Jungkook hate guns. More than he hate fights. So before he knows it, he is against the wall, protecting himself.

The man said something taking a slow step closer, but Jungkook couldn't hear it clearly - he was too afraid to. Only two types of pople use guns: Cops and the bad guys, sometimes the person is both, like his past owner. He don't like it. Other hybrids were leaving with more people in black in the corridor, and he couldn't understand why. The man reached out for him, and he growled, his ears flat against his head, tail between his legs. So the man steped back, calling for someone.

Poor thing. A million things were crossing Jungkook's mind, all of them horrible... They found me... my old owners found me... They will kill me... They will make me kill... I need to scape...

He was ready to fight his way free, to jump against the tall man and run the faster he could. He was ready to fly through the window even if it was a fall of three floors. Anything but going back to that hell...

His thoughts got cut by a smaller person appering from behind the man. You were all in black too, with tactical boots and all. But no gun. 

"Go help with the others..." Your voice came demanding but soft. When the man disappeared, you tried to approach Jungkook. He growled again. "It's ok..." You said pulling down your mask, revelling your face, and a soft smille. "My name is Y/N. I'mma friend, we are here to help.". You took a step closer, and Jungkook let you. You saw it as a hint to continue, crouching down to stay on the same level as him - he hadn't even realized he was huddled in the corner - and reaching out so he can smell you. "We know this place is no good... So we came to rescue.".

He sniffed you once. In the next second Jungkook was all over you. Practically jumping around you, wagging his tail and smelling you. You smell like truth to him, also something sweet, so he'd follow you anywhere.

"Hey, easy boy." You laugh. Automatically Jungkook got embarrassed for being so excited, a little bit more and he would've crushed you in a hug. "What's your name?"

"Jungkook."

"Well, Jungkook... Nice to meet ya." You reach out to greet him, and he took your hand in his. But before he could say anything back, the man appeared in the door frame again, now caring a little cat hybrid girl.

"Y/N, all the bombs are in place. We need to go."

Bombs? Jungkook ears lifted in alert. Like bombs that explode? He looked to you waiting some reaction.

"Oh crap. Is everyone out?" You casually answered.

"We are the last ones I think..." He said as if it was about the weather, carefully accommodating the sleepy girl in his arms.

Maybe bombs are not that big of a deal. Jungkook thought to himself, accepting the odd perspective of both of you.

"Ok, Jungkook, this place is going down. If it there is anything you want to take with you..." 

Before you finish the sentence he was putting a tiny wallet in his pocket, and wearing a old cap from the nightstand.

"Ready." Jungkook said with a nod.

You smiled, pulling your mask back up in place. "Let's go then.". You took his hand and ran through the door, Jungkook close behind.

Out side almost all the other hybrids were already safe in the couple of vans of your group, approximately twenty people in black escorting them. You lead Jungkook to one of them following the orientation of another woman with mask and high ponytail. "You go with Youngjae, Y/N.".

"Ok, thanks."

A lot of the hybrids were totally ok with the action, others, mostly the youngers, were sleeping or half asleep. Despite that, a rabbit girl were crying to not enter the van you were supposed to go in.

"You are not understanding... I was going to be adopted on Monday, I need to be here when they came to get me... " she sobbed.

"We know, it's ok... " Youngjae rubbed her arms to comfort her. "We read your file, and I promise you will be with your new owners soon. Okay?"

The girl entered in the van, still a little reluctant, sitting in the passenger's seat - where you were supposed to sit. You didn't think much about it though. You made Jungkook enter and sit in one of the only two available sits, and even if it were more options for you, he didn't let go of your hand, practically pulling you down. He wouldn't make eye contact with you, preferring to keep his gaze down, and wouldn't initiate a conversation, but he would not let go of you neither...

Actually he was holding your hand for dear life.

This is good. You through to yourself. 

Hybrids need to feel safe, and if he feels this way right now... It's good. You read all the files of all hybrids days before this of invasion, to know how bad the situation was. Not all of the poor creatures had a sad past before the shelter - all of them were suffering abuse in the shelter  - but you remember specifically of Jungkook file, and his violent precedence in rings. When you saw the pictures  of how he arrived at the shelter, bruised and curled up in the corner you felt sick and sad. Employee reports said he didn’t allow proximity and showed passive aggression, save for one of the vets, so you - experienced in hybrid behavior - volunteered to be responsible for him. Definitely you didn't expect him to be so easily trusty of you. And that's really good. 

"You ok?" You murmure to him just in case. He just nodded, still staring his feet.

A whimper caught the attention of both of you. The dog hybrid that was beside Jungkook, that must've be sixteen, was shrinking up against the window and holding a bunch of stuffed animals as a shield, apparently afraid him. Jungkook scoffed it with a low growl, turning his eyes back to his shabby shoes, choosing to ignore the boy. This kid was the one invading his space earlier that morning. You got alert to intervene in case of a fight, tensing up.

But Jungkook hate fights. Even more if it happens in tight places like a van. He wouldn't do anything even if he wanted to, and it wasn't the case. There is no one who can force him to fight again.

"Everyone is here? Ok. LET'S GO!" That other woman closed the van's door that started moving. In the shelter's external wall, Jungkook saw the enormous words 'SET US FREE' written in red. Just after the last van passed through the gate the building they all were just a few meters before exploded.

"Wooow!" You cheered along Youngjae and some hybrids.

Jungkook turned on his sit to see the flames through the back window, flames red and high likng the black sky of the night, illuminating all around. You observed the look of amazement in his eyes, wondering what he was thinking. Well, the shelter is what saved Jungkook from his old life. In the shelter he could eat three full meal a day, have his own things and shower every day - his favorite part. But he was always surrounded by crowds what make him anxious most of time, and always getting scolded by the shelter employees that clearly didn't really cared for him, getting beaten up more than once. So he couldn't name the feeling in his chest. He could be sad... Or it could be satisfaction... A mix of both maybe. He just imagined the face of the guys that beat him up seeing the ruins and that written wall next morning and chuckled.

"Jungkook sit straight and put the seat belt, please." You squished his hand lightly.

Another feeling that he couldn't name... "Oh. Ok."

A silence settled in the vehicle, cutting trough the night city at high speed. Most of the hybrids were falling asleep, feeling the euphoria of getting free of the shelter going away, long night after all - and it didn't even ended yet - you couldn't blame them to be tired. You knew that in the moment the job ended and the adrenaline lowered, you would be dead tired yourself, ready to sleep till next year. Unfortunately you must keep your image intact and free suspicions, what means going to work normally next day. But in the moment you needed to be alert and ready to protect. Or at least awake.

Just like Jungkook. This boy was wide awake, looking through the window, paying attention in how the  Youngjae drives super fast, and gazing you by the corner of his eyes. If he had more space he would be jumping around, his dog excitement exploding out of control. Or he would get shy and only imagine it while looking trough nothing. Something in his mind was, where were you all going? That girl apparently was going to be adopted soon, do that mean he would be adopted too? What kind of owner he would get? But can he trust it would happen? Or trust in these people in black? He didn't know you or your group. What if you were the bad guys, kidnapping hybrids to do bad things...? Jungkook stared suspiciously to you, who was talking quietly with the driver. You didn't seen bad, or mean, or evil. Quite the opposite, you look cute and sweet and beautiful, almost too good to be real. He could say you look totally harmless too if it were not for the shock weapon in your waist and tactical boots ... or the whole situation in general. You're just like every ordinary people that usually look at him fear and mistrust.

"Is everything ok?" You asked again. He just made 'no' with his head. You narrowed your eyes, focusing on Jungkook's face. "This bruises... What happened?"

The poor boy considered what to say, fearing that you would not believe him if he said that he got unjustly beaten, which is true, but obviously you would think he deserved it. Maybe he should stay quiet, so you wouldn't hate him. He should at least look like a good boy to impress. Before Jungkook decided between truth or silence - lying was out of question, he was horrorible in it - a voice besides him awnsered.

"The guards were bored and attacked him for no reason." You both looked to the young boy who had a guilty expression. "I'm sorry, it was my fault, I just wanted to play..."

"Oh". Both you and Jungkook cooed. He didn't expected do recieve a out side help, much less a apologise, the feeling was unprecedented. 

"And well, you were the only one who didn't know about the rescue, I wanted to tell you."  

Jungkook was confused. "Everybody knew?"

"All the hybrids..." The boy said, suddenly super comfortable around Jungkook.

"And some employes who helped us from within." You added, pulling Jungkook's face for you to see again. "Did someone treated this cut?" You questioned. 

Jungkook made 'no' with his head once more and than completed with a low voice. 

"The doctor who likes me wasn't working today.".

You sighed in understanding.

"She was one who helped us, we got her an alibi away from here."  You leaned forward, talking to the driver through the rear view mirror. "Youngjae, do we have a first aid kit?" 

"Under my seat."

The boy stared at the stuffed animals for a good time and then extended one to Jungkook. “Keep him.”

Jungkook looked at the stuffed bunny closely and smiled. “Thank you.”

With the white suitcase open on your lap and letting go of Jungkook's hand - for his dislike - you puted some hydrogen peroxide in a piece of gauze and faced him. "Can I?" You asked permission with a smile. Just like the sweet doctor did when the shelter welcomed him you took care of him - with a little less skill, but lovelly still, making him feel safe. Ok, he absolutelly trust you now.

___________________________________________________

Durig the next hour you received on the radio  news of the vans that took different paths  arriving at the meeting place, yours being one of the last ones. Gladly no one had any unwanted encounters or problems on the way. The place in question was a freight train station, the secondthe van stoped, Youngjae was out to open the lateral door and you waking the hybrids up. "Lets go my sweet things. You can go back to sleep in a little while." You picked up a sleepy little hybrid, and along Youngjae helped all of them to get aou of the van, to follow the group to two big wagons open for them. Outside, those who saw would see only a common freight train, but inside the cars were adapted to take those hybridos in comfort and safety to a farm, one of the places where your organization guarantees a dignified life for hybrids, especially those who have not had an easy past, whether living there or going to good owners - whatever they choose. Jungkook tried to accompany you in the crowd by holding your hand, but he lost you by a few meter, almost not being able to see you between so many heads and the low light, just following your voice, biting his lip anxiously. For a moment his focus leaved you to the rabbit hybrid girl, she got separated from the group, having time to just quickly  say goodbye to another girl, before she run to a car where a couple was waiting for her, the three of then huged, the man took her bag and putted in the trunk. She was really being adopted. Oh man, Jungkook want this so bad. If he is a good boy will he be adopted soon too? "Please, get in." A man in black putted a hand in Jungkook shouder, making him came back daydream. He got surprised for a momente, this man had dog ears to, the men in black have hybrid in their crew. "Please, get i the train." "Wait. No... Y/N..." Apparently he was the only one disturbing, all the other hybrids obeying quietly or already inside the car, looking at him as if he was a weirdo - at least Jungkook felt this way. "Y/N?" "I'm here." You emerged from the crowd. "It's okay, Jungkook, you can get in." "Ok." He smiled to you taking your hand again. He trust you so... But he stoped midstep when he noticed you didn't move. "Aren't you coming too?" You seemed surpresided when responding. "No." He thought for half a second and decided, setting his feet on the ground. "So I'm not getting in neither." "Jungkook..." you tried to argument but he interrupted you. "I'll go where you go." You both held each other's gaze for a moment. All the hybrids were now accommodated in the train wich was about to leave. That women from before came to hurry you, but you wheren't listenning at all. "Does it mean you want to go home with me?" You firmily asked. Without a second thought he vigorously nodded. "Yes." You released a sigh of relief and smiled.  "They can close the doors. This one I'll take with me." You say to the woman, making Jungkook jump in his spot from excitement.  "Are you sure?" She questioned.  "Yep"  You guided a super happy Jungkook to the oposite direction the train started to move to, the sound of the locomotive and loud honk blinding the little sounds of joy coming out of his mouth as he takes your hand again, swinging it back and forth. Your organization companions looking at you with knowing eyes. Never before you even consider adopting any of the rescued hybrids.

______________________________________________________________

this gonna be a series too. pls give love to it.

[cocktail-party-in-an-abattoir]

In Memoriam Herschel (2005-2021)

           It was the late summer/early autumn of 2005. I was 16 years old. I went to a friend’s house for a get-together with other friends. She lived in a more rural area, so stray cats were not uncommon. One of these strays had recently birthed a litter of kittens. They were corralled into a blocked-off area in my friend’s den. Naturally, we all gravitated towards the kittens. We spent a good while petting them, playing with them, holding them, and watching them with their mother. A particular kitten was a gray and white tabby. This kitten had made its way towards me and tried to crawl up one of my jean legs. I was wearing bootcut jeans, so it actually managed it. I was immediately drawn to this kitten, the idea of asking my parents if we could keep it already forming.

While my friends and I were playing with them, we decided to give them all smartass, noncommittal names. None of us could sex kittens, so that was reflected in the names we chose. I named the gray and white tabby (of which there were two, but I zeroed in on the jean leg kitten) “Herschel.” Why? Well, when I was eight or nine, I used to play House with friends. I had heard the name “Herschel” on some sitcom, and I liked the sound of it. So, I often named my fake son “Herschel.” This became an inside joke between my best friend and me.

            Back at home, I asked my mom if we could adopt the kitten. She had veto power. She was kind of hesitant at first but eventually relented. A few weeks later my friend and her mom brought the kitten over to my house. By that point I was already seriously referring to it as “Herschel.” We all just kind of assumed it was male. The first thing Herschel did after getting out of the carrying case was hide behind one of our bookcases and stayed there.

            We took Herschel to the vet. Upon examination the vet tech proclaimed he was, in fact, she. Her exact words were “You have a little girl!” For better or for worse, I was committed to “Herschel” (much to my mom’s chagrin), so from then on, I had a girl cat with a boy name. This led to years of various people (mostly veterinary staff) getting her sex wrong. I don’t know that I ever bothered correcting them because, well, they were going to find out the truth soon enough.

            Between 2005 and 2010, Herschel grew from a kitten with what my mom described as “Yoda ears” into a gorgeous young lady. She had the most beautiful green eyes. People always had nice things to say about her looks. She had an adorable bow-legged gait from the beginning. She grew into an affectionate little cuddle-bug once she adjusted to us. She was wary of strangers, which was probably for the best. She did not like to go outside as much as our older cat, Simba (RIP)—especially after being treed once—but she was a very skilled huntress. She even managed to get two hummingbirds. Obviously, I’m not a fan of such “presents,” but I couldn’t help but be impressed by her prowess.

            In 2007, we adopted 2 labs named Olive and Penny (RIP x2). 2010, we adopted two fluffy black kittens from our vet’s office. We named them Buttercup and Licorice (RIP x2). Herschel respected Simba because of his seniority, but she absolutely despised the other pets. She would growl and hiss at them on sight. Because of this, the dogs had to stay downstairs while the cats had free rein upstairs. By 2012, Buttercup had gone missing, and we had adopted two more animals: a cat named Kid Twist (“Twist” for short) and a blue heeler named Bleu. Herschel did not care for them either. That same year my parents moved one state over, and I moved to a nearby city to stay with a family friend. The Menagerie went with my parents.

            One day in 2013 or 2014 my mom commented about how Herschel hid under a guest room bed much of the time. She would only come out to do her business or eat. Since the dogs had free rein over the entire house, this meant there was no real “safe space” for Herschel. Thus, her reclusiveness. Mom was worried about her well-being. I offered to take Herschel under my wing. Mom agreed. Now, my housemate already had a few cats, so it wasn’t perfect, but it was an improvement over a house with dogs. Herschel had been under my care since.

            In 2015 Herschel moved with me into the apartment I currently live in. Despite my apartment’s smallness, she was finally the one cat in a one-cat home. I had stopped letting her out because a) my apartment complex is positively labyrinthine b) the complex is next to a busy highway, and c) I wanted her to live longer and not harm any wildlife (although her hunting days were behind her). She didn’t seem to mind. For the next few years, she was my kitty comrade. Aside from some dental issues and a heart murmur, she always had a clean bill of health. I honestly thought she was going to live as long as Simba had (18, almost 19) because he was also a spry geriatric cat.

            In late 2020, Herschel was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism. She had been growing thinner and vomiting before I found out. I had to start giving her medication twice per day, but there was otherwise no change. She was still the empress I knew and loved, if a little slower. I thought that was going to be it. Then, earlier this year, the vet ran some more tests. While I had managed to lower her thyroid levels, the vet found another problem: chronic kidney disease. My blood ran cold upon hearing this because one of our pet labs, Olive, had died from kidney failure a few years prior. The vet told me while there was no cure, CKD could be managed with diet changes and medication. He was right, but unfortunately, that wasn’t the case with Herschel. She quickly went from stage 3 to stage 4 (4 being the end stage). I still kick myself about this because I feel like I could’ve found out sooner. Anyway, the vet suggested I should have Herschel hospitalized for a couple of days with IV fluids. The idea was to basically rehydrate her and then start a regimen of a new diet, supplements, and medication.

            So, I waited outside for three hours until a hospital staff member came to collect Herschel. It would’ve been longer, but my very kind vet called ahead. A couple of days later my mom and I returned to the hospital to wait for Herschel. It was March 25th, my birthday. One of the vets called me and stated despite the diuresis, Herschel’s stats remained the same. She stated I had probably 2 weeks left with her. I knew she was right, but I was still determined to try. I gave her daily cocktails of medication. I learned how to give her subcutaneous injections to hydrate her. I got the prescription wet food. At first, she had more okay days than bad, but it eventually became clear she was circling the drain. Treatment transformed into hospice care. I was going to do everything possible to keep her comfortable. By the end she was incontinent and no longer eating or drinking. Then she stopped being able to walk. I knew I had to make the final appointment. After a long crying session, I did.

            My mom came to help yesterday. Herschel was mostly immobile and out of it. Not even her favorite prosciutto roused her. I swaddled her in a changing pad and a blanket and slept with her next to me for one more night. She was still alive this morning if barely. Before we were set to go to her final appointment, I played her Sugarloaf’s “Green-Eyed Lady” (which will always remind me of her) and Audrey Hepburn’s version of “Moon River.” As my mom and I went to prepare her for the appointment, we realized how still she was. She did not appear to be breathing, and she did not react to anything we did. I took a flashlight to her pupils and… she was gone. She had died peacefully on my couch, which was one of her favorite spots to lounge. Honestly, I was relieved because the thought of taking her to a strange place to be euthanized frankly distressed me. I cuddled her ragdoll body from then until we were sitting in the vet office’s parking lot. Mom got a chance to hold her, too. A vet tech came out, used her stethoscope, and confirmed what we already knew. After a few more minutes with her we said our last goodbyes. I filled out paperwork confirming I wanted her ashes returned to me with a clay pawprint.

            I want Herschel’s ashes buried on my parents’ property with the others. Maybe a little farther away since she did not like most of them. I’m also looking into urn jewelry so I can carry her with me. This cat saw me at some of my lowest points, including when I was furloughed from my job last year. This cat was sweet and affectionate but also a pesky little shit. This cat was the first living being I was fully responsible for. She somehow managed to be regal while shoving her butthole into your face. If she liked you, she came and sat with you. If she didn’t, she hid behind the washing machine. I’m convinced she was part slug because even at her largest she was able to fit into confined spaces. I will miss her trilling meows. She was beautiful to the end, and I will always love her and miss her. I don’t know if there is an afterlife or not, but if there is, I hope she has endless king crab and prosciutto to snack on.

[my-emotional-self]

Dodger’s Vet

Pairings: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, sick Dodger, Fluff

Summary: Chris meets the new Veterinary in town when Dodger becomes sick.  

A/N: I imagine this happening right after he gets back home from filming The Deep Sea Diving Resort so he has his longer hair and beard!  Oh, and I this idea just popped into my head. Should I continue and do a couple more parts?

You walked into the clinic early Tuesday morning, turning on all the lights.  Smiling, you looked around at your facility, delighted at what you saw.  It had been a long time coming, but you finally graduated from school and you were officially a Veterinarian.  Not only that, but with all the hard work you put yourself through, you managed to open your own clinic in a small town just outside of Boston.  

Boston is where you were from, but you wanted to move just outside of the large city and into a smaller community.  Your grandparents, bless their souls, gave you your inheritance early because they saw how determined you were and they didn’t want you to drown in bills.  

Luckily they were very wealthy, putting into the right stocks; that’s what you get when your grandpa worked on Wall Street his whole life.  Because of your early inheritance, you were able to pay off your loans from school, buy yourself a quaint little house, and also open up your own Veterinarian Clinic.  To say life was great would be an understatement.  

It had been a little over six months since you had moved to Sudbury, and just about three months since you had opened up your clinic.  You were nervous to say the least, unsure if your clinic would be a hit or miss in this small town.  But you did your research and saw that the closest Vet Clinic around was nearly 15 miles away.  

One of the things you prided yourself on is that three days a week, you were on call after hours for emergencies just in case.  

Because your clinic had been a big success so far, you were able to hire on two other Veterinarians, one a specialty in exotic animals also, and six Veterinarian Assistance.  To make things even better, your clinic was only a mile down the road, making it easier to head home during lunch breaks and feed your own brood of animals.  

Currently you had three dogs and two cats; all of them rescued or saved.  Two of your dogs you saved because people came in for emergencies and couldn’t afford the services.  They ended up leaving the clinic, and the dogs and you gladly worked on them and took them home.  They were both Corgis, both brothers and they had gotten into some poison at the house. Luckily you were able to save them, but it was very touch and go.  Your other dog was a Great Dane named Petunia; you found it funny how you named her such a delicate name for a big dog but she was your baby.  Your cats were also brothers and you named them Tom and Jerry as they were both rambunctious little buggers.  

Heading into your office, you looked over your list of patients for the day and smiled when you saw Dodger was coming in for a check-up and his shots.  He was such a good boy and his fur was so soft; he was by far one of your favorite patients to date.  

~~~

The day went by fairly quickly and before you knew it, there was a knock on your door.  One of the assistance poked her head through, letting you know that Dodger was in exam room three and ready for you.  

With a smile, you got up from your chair in your office and made your way down the hall.  When you got to the exam room, you gave a quick knock to let them know you were there.  

Upon opening the room, Dodger got up from his spot on the floor, tail wagging excitedly as he raced over to meet you.  

“Hi there Dodger! Yes, it’s so good to see you too,” you cooed as you knelt down, letting the happy dog give you kisses.  “Hello Lisa.  It’s good to see you too.”

Lisa chuckled at the dog attacking you with kisses.  “It’s good to see you too Dr. Y/L/N.”

“Oh please, call me Y/N. Dodger and  I are on a first name basis now so I’m hoping we can do that too,” you said with a smile, looking at the woman sitting in the chair.  She gave you a nod and a smile back.  “Alright, so just a check-up and a few shots today for Dodger is that right?”

“Yeah.  He’s got his last round of shots I believe and then he will be all caught up.”

Walking over to the wall, you pushed a button and the large metal table descended to the ground. With the help of Lisa, you got Dodger onto the table and you held him down as it moved back up into place.  

You checked his ears and his breathing, along with a few other normal procedures before grabbing the shots off the counter.  

His tail started wagging when he saw you grabbing the treats from the jar.  You handed them to Lisa as she kept him busy while you administered the shots.  He was always such a good boy, holding still for you.  

“And we are all done. You did good Dodger,” you beamed giving him a scratch behind the ear as his tongue rolled out from his mouth.  

“Thank you so much Y/N. I’m so happy you decided to move here and open a clinic.  Dodger is so relaxed around you and you are nice and close to home,” Lisa gushed with a smile, taking your hand in hers.  

“It’s my pleasure, really.”

“My son should be home in the next few weeks so if Dodger needs to come back for any reason, I’m sure it will be him bringing him here and not me.”

“Well I’ll be sad to miss you but please feel free to stop by and say hi anytime you want.”

~~~

“Just take him into the vet,” Lisa said, speaking to her son over the phone.  

“I honestly don’t know if it’s that serious Ma,” Chris said as he watched Dodger have diarrhea yet again in the backyard of his home.  “On second thought, he’s doing it again.

“Honey, I’m telling you, this new vet in town is amazing.  Dodger loves her.”

Chris sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.  “It’s after hours.  I’d have to wait until tomorrow to even see if I can get an appointment in.”

“Well, what day is it?” Lisa asked.

“Umm,” Chris began to say, not even aware of what day it was as always lost track of time when he came home from filming.  “Thursday. Why?”

“Oh good.  If you are worried about Dodger at any point tonight, know that Dr. Y/L/N is on call for emergencies.  She lives very close by to her clinic so it won’t be a problem.”

“Ma, I don’t want to wake him up,”

“Her,” Lisa cut him off. The vet that sees Dodger is female.”

“Ok then.  I don’t want to wake HER up in the middle of the night if it’s not serious.”

“Well, that’s fine sweetie. But keep an eye on Dodger.  If he suddenly begins to vomit as well, then you really need to take him in.”

Later that night as Chris was getting ready for bed, close to midnight, he heard a weird sound coming from the living room.  Rushing out of his room, he saw Dodger throwing up on the ground.  

“Fuck buddy, what is wrong with you huh?  Did you get into something?”  Chris began to panic, knowing he couldn’t lose Dodger.  

Grabbing his phone, he dialed the number his mom had given him.  On the fourth ring, a groggy sounding voice answered the phone.  

~~~

Groaning at the ringing of your phone, you rolled over in bed and answered it.  “Dr. Y/L/N.”

“Umm, yeah.  Hi.  My name is Chris and I’m the owner of Dodger,” the man on the phone said frantically. Immediately you perked up at Dodger’s name.

“Hello Chris.  Is Dodger alright?” you asked, trying not to sound panicked.  That was the one thing about being a Vet; you got attached to your patients so easily and with Dodger involved, you were beginning to worry.  

“Not really.  Two days ago he began to have diarrhea, so I withheld all food and treats for 24 hours and when I fed him again this morning, well, the diarrhea came back and now he’s throwing up.”  

“Ok Chris.  If you are willing to, I can be at my clinic in five minutes.”

“Yeah,” Chris breathed out, “Yeah I’ll meet you there.  Thank you so much Dr. Y/L/N.”

“It’s not a problem at all Chris.  It’s what I’m here for.”

Five minutes later you pulled up at the front of your clinic and raced to the front door to unlock it. The parking lot was deserted so Chris and Dodger had not shown up yet.  

Walking into your office, you put down your coat and purse before heading out into the main lobby to wait for them.  

It only took a minute before you saw a car pull into the parking lot.  Opening the front door, you saw a man with dark hair that hung just above his ears, and a thick yet trimmed beard, opening the back of his car door.

He picked up Dodger and carried him into the clinic as you held the door open for him.  Your heart dropped at seeing Dodger so lethargic, making you worry even more.  You quickly locked the door behind him.  

“Let’s take him to exam room one,” you said as you began to walk down the hallway.  

Chris placed Dodger on the metal table as you got to work quickly examining him.  You checked his breathing, along with to see if he had a fever. Lifting his top tip, you pressed against his pale gums.  

“Ok, so far I can tell he has a fever and he is severely dehydrated, which is common in dogs who have diarrhea and are vomiting.  I’d like to give him some water via an IV if you are alright with that?” you asked looking at Chris and waiting for his answer.  

He nodded hastily. “Yes.  Yeah I’ll agree to anything as long as he gets better.”  Your heart sunk at his words and you knew right away he was a great doggie dad; wanting to do anything for his boy.  

You got an IV into Dodger as he lay on the table; no energy whatsoever.  Once the water began to flow into his system, you grabbed a syringe and took a vial of blood.  

“I’m going to go back into the lab and check his blood to see if I can find the underlying issue to what’s wrong with him.”

Chris nodded his head as he sat on the chair next to Dodger and petting him.  

It didn’t take more than a few minutes before you came back into the room, removing your gloves from your hands.  “When was the last time Dodger had a bowel movement?”

“Ummm,” Chris began to say, checking his watch, “about twenty minutes ago.  As I was getting my shoes on he went in the house again and I didn’t have time to clean it up.  I just wanted to get him here.”

You gave him a soft smile. “Well I think you did the right thing in bringing him here.  I can tell his breathing is already becoming more steady from the water IV.  But I have a favor to ask you and I completely understand if you don’t want to leave him here.”

Chris’ brows furrowed. “What is it?”

“I think I might know what’s wrong with him, but the absolute 100% way to tell for sure is to get a stool sample.  Preferably one that is not much older than 30 minutes.”

“Oh….Oh,” Chris said in final realization.  

“Like I said Chris. If you don’t want to leave him here with me, I completely understand.  We can always wait until he has another bowel movement.”

Chris jumped up from his chair, checking to make sure he had his keys, wallet and cellphone. “No.  It’s really no problem at all.  I only live a few minutes away and I really just want to get to the bottom of why he’s sick.  I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

You sat down in the chair next to Dodger; not much else you could do at this point until Chris came back with the stool sample.  As you sat with Dodger, your fingers ran through his thick tan fur, smiling lightly at the dog as he looked at you with hopeful eyes.

Almost fifteen minutes later, Dodger perked his head up slightly, his eyes landed on you. “You’ll be ok buddy.  I know you will pull through.  You’re such a strong boy aren’t you?  Yes you are.”  Leaning forward, you let Dodger lick you, giving you kisses, completely unaware that Chris had heard and seen the whole thing.  

“I’ve got it,” Chris said quietly, not wanting to disturb Dodger.  

Getting up from your spot, you thanked him and headed into the lab with the stool sample.  Placing it under the microscope, you let out a sigh as your gut was right.  

Heading back into the room, you felt warmth envelope your body at the sight of Chris and Dodger. You were a good judge of character when it came to owners of pets and you knew Chris took the best care of Dodger that he possibly could.  

He didn’t realize you were standing there so you took a few more moments to admire the sight in front of you.  Chris looked familiar to you, but you just couldn’t quite put your finger on it. Giving up, you made yourself known.

“Just as I thought,” you said, walking into the room, arms folded over your chest.  Chris stood up, concern washing over his face.  “Do you want the good news first, or the good news?”

Chris’ eyes grew wide before finally letting out a sigh, realizing there was only good news to be said.

“I’ll ah, I’ll take the good news first,” he said with a smile; the first smile you had seen of the night; and boy did he look beautiful with a smile.  

“The good news is that I found out what is wrong with him.  He has Giardia.  The other good news is that once his IV is finished, you can take him home.  I’ll give you some antibiotics to start giving him, and you need to start him on a bland diet.  Start with rice and after a couple of days you can add in some cooked chicken.  Feed him that for about a week and then slowly start incorporating his food back into his diet.  He should be as good as new in no time.”

The relief was easily noticeably as Chris relaxed his shoulders; his hand resting on Dodger’s side as he pet his dog.  You walked forward and scratched behind Dodger’s ear.

“Has he been around any other dogs recently?” you asked, looking up at Chris; just noticing now how tall he was compared to your frame.  

“Umm, actually yeah. I took him to the dog park two days ago.”

You nodded, figuring that must have been where he contracted it.  “Giardia is very contagious, especially from other dogs.  In fact, humans can contract it as well.  It’s contracted through feces, or infected water or surfaces from feces.  When you get home tonight, if you aren’t too tired, make sure you clean up all the areas that Dodger has had an accident in the house very well.  We don’t want this moving to you.  I’m also going to give you a special shampoo for Dodger.  It will remove any feces that perhaps maybe stuck into his fur or anywhere on him.”  Chris nodded at your words, ready to do whatever it takes.  

Once Dodger’s IV was finished, you held the door open for Chris as he carried a now sleepy and relaxed Dodger into his car.  After placing him in the backseat, Chris headed back inside to grab the antibiotics and shampoo.  

“How much do I owe you?” Chris asked as he took out his wallet, grabbing his credit card.  

You waved your hands in front of him.  “Please, don’t worry about it Chris.  It’s on the house.”

His hands stilled, looking up at you with shock.  “What? This was considered an emergency. It’s the middle of the night. Please, Dr. Y/L/N, it’s no problem. No matter what the cost is.  Trust me,” he said handing over his credit card.

You smiled at him, gently pushing his hand with the card away from you.  “I can’t possibly charge you when it comes to Dodger.  In any case of emergency, I would have happily helped, especially when it comes to him.  He’s become my best patient,” you said with a smile.  “And please, just like I told your mother, call me Y/N.”

Chris gave you a sad smile and you could tell he was battling with himself over fighting you more, wanting to pay.  

“Are you sure I can’t pay anything?”

You chuckled, shaking your head.  “No. But I will let you pay for his check-up on Monday.  Does that sound fair?”

Chris nodded, giving you another graceful smile.  “It’s less than I was hoping for, but I guess it will have to do.”

After grabbing your purse and coat from your office, you walked Chris to the door.  Shutting off the lights, you locked up and you both headed to your respected cars.

You paused when you got to your door; Chris doing the same at his car as he looked at you.  “You have my number.  Please feel free to call if he worsens at all.”

Chris gave you a nod and a quick smile.  “So I’ll see you on Monday?”

Giving him your own nod and smile, you got into your car and headed back to your quant little house.  

~~~

After Chris got home, he laid Dodger on his dog bed and began to clean the house like a mad man in any and all spots that Dodger had an accident.  

Once he was finished he hopped into bed; his arm leaning over the side to comfort Dodger by petting him.

One thing was for sure, he couldn’t get you out of his mind.  From the minute he saw you, he thought you were so unbelievably beautiful. The way you took care of Dodger also made his heart race in such a desirably way.  He always knew that the woman he was with had to be an animal lover.

And then when you refused to have him pay for your services?  That got his mind reeling.  He couldn’t think of anyone who would refuse payment on an emergency service like this.  In his mind, you seemed like the perfect woman and he couldn’t wait to see you again on Monday.

Tag List: @the-wayward-robot @badassbaker @guera31 @tanelle83 @xjjlex @chrisevansfanfic @mrs-captain-evans @pumbibaby @princess-evans-addict @joannie95 @patzammit @brastrangled @notyourtypicalrose @sfreeborn @esoltis280 @xxloki81xx @poerebel @bornfortherainydays @livslookingforloki @raveviolet @southerngracela

[unholyhelbig]

Prompt- Beca is a vet and has been called in to watch over and take care of an injured wolf. But the next morning, she's surprised and confused as to why is there a red-headed woman in the place of where the wolf was. (Chloe is a werewolf)

A/N: I went a little too far with this one. But when don’t I? Let me know if you want a part two. 

It was abnormal to get a phone call in the middle of a winter night. Snow had just begun to fall a few hours earlier, coating the hard ground with a thin layer of white that the street lamps flashed against at the right angle. It kept Beca’s hardwood floors cold as she placed her feet against them, cringing slightly as her bare feet got met with a blast of frozen edge.

“Hello?” She spoke, groggily as she ran her hand through her tangled hair. “A what?”  

A wolf. That’s what her assistant had just said to her. Or at least that’s what Beca thought she heard. She still had a thick haze over her mind, eyes blinking against the darkness as they adjusted enough for her to make out the wobbly shadows of her dresser and nightstand. This was California. There weren’t any wolves in California. Coyote’s- maybe. But not in this suburban part of town.

It brought an unusual excitement to her, her pulse picking up as she flicked on the desk lamp to her side. Her heartbeat picked up against her chest. In a cruel way of thinking, this was captivating. Ever since she had the chance to start her own veterinary practice in the quells of the West Coast she had seen nothing more than canine’s and cats, which she still enjoyed treating, but even the occasional bird got her excited for something different.

“Yeah, no” She stood, eyes flashing towards the clock. It was nearly 3am. “That’s what I thought you said. Where is she now?”

Her office. Great.

Granted the old man who brought her in didn’t think a  half a mammoth sized wolf would cause a dent in his hood- something made very clear by the way he was mumbling in the background of the car. He spoke about going to the city about the damages. There was no way in hell that he was paying for the thousand-dollar Vet bill for a wolf. As he put it very nicely.

Beca instructed her assistant to keep the man as calm as possible and continue to monitor the vitals of the large animal before informing her not to call the control officers. A wild animal was different than the domestic dogs they saw on everyday occasions- but even she knew they would act with rash decision and quickly muzzle the animal before putting it down without even considering the possibility of survival.

She begrudgingly shivered against a pair of black sweatpants and a sweatshirt that she had laying around. It would have to do against the weather for right now, the girl not having the pension to deal with a heavy winter coat on a night like this.

Despite her eagerness, to her practice, she knew the roads were icy and her truck couldn’t’ quite take a spin-out. So, she took her time getting down the suburban streets- all the houses the same; dark and unsettled. There was a tire swing here and there, and maybe a toy car that was left out of the garage in an act of laziness. But they were still designed with the same black shutters and honey-colored paint.

The lights were on in the exam room when she pulled up to the large brick building with the illuminated sign; Mitchell & Posen Animal Hospital. She shook her head at the idea, not wanting to go with a cheesy name like Tags and wags. (Which was probably the name of another office downtown.)

A red truck with a clearly busted headlight and a crumpled hood was one of the only other cars in the lot. Beca saw the breath of the old man before she recognized his frame and the slowly lifting and falling of a burning cigarette. She held her breath, shutting off her own car before stepping onto the icy walkway.

“You’re the vet?” He asked, voice harsher than the one she heard on the phone.

Her assistant seemed to have given up on actual human contact and focused all her attention on the wolf that was inside of the building. Personally, Beca would have done the same. Worried about the possibility of the animal waking up and really doing some damage.

“I am,” she said, “Can I ask you a few questions?”

He seemed taken aback by this. He wanted to yell, his face red from the cold and from the discontent that wracked his twisted features. He scoffed, throwing the cigarette down to the ground before grinding the ashes with the tip of his boot. “I suppose, sweetheart.”

Beca swallowed back the anger in the back of her throat as she lifted her chin slightly at the man. “You hit this thing, so you tell me how fast you were going.”

“I don’t know, bout’ fifty, maybe sixty.” He huffed, “that animal jumped out in front of me. I didn’t’ have time to stop so I slammed the breaks. Didn’t’ do much use in this weather though.”

“I suppose not.”

“I wrote my information down with blondie in there. Like I said, I’m going to the city over this-“

“Where did you hit it?”

He blinked at her dumbly for a few seconds after being cut off. She was sleep riddled, and her fingers tapped restlessly against her thigh as she stood uninterested, but still concerned. “On the corner of sunset and 31st.”

She drew in a careful breath. That was a crowded part of the city, even at this time of night. She found herself somewhat grateful that it was an older man and not some pretentious couple on their way home from the club. At least he had the decency to pick the wolf up and bring her to the only place that advertised emergency care.  

Beca mustered up a thank you and took the man’s contact information before closing and locking her door behind her. She watched him drive out of the lot through the glass door that had frosty lettering on it. Part of her was unthawing as she flexed her fingers and turned towards the exam room.

The first thing she noticed was how careful her assistant was. The girl kept the lights low as if not to disturb a clearly nocturnal animal. One that took up most, if not all, of her metal exam table. The only glow could be seen from two x-ray slabs that shaded the woman in a lowly neon light.

She almost gasped at the sheer size of the animal; she had seen wolves before, but it escaped her just how big they got. The wolf was conscious, but not viable to gain enough strength to move. It was clearly in pain; stomach rising and falling against russet fur with each passing moment.

“I gave her some sedative,” Jessica said, confidently running her fingers over the animal’s fur, she was almost captivated. “She’s been good.”

Good. Her young assistant muttered her words like she had just potty trained a puppy to use something other than a little pad set up in the corner. This was a wild animal, and Beca was wary, sliding on a pair of purple latex gloves as seamlessly as she could with her numb skin.

“She has two shattered ribs and an avulsion right against her left hip. I stopped the bleeding for now, but she might need stitches.”  

Beca nodded reaching behind her as she grasped the stethoscope that hung by the door like a hat after a long day of work. She was beside herself, halting right in front of the large beast; yes, it was a vicious predator that traveled in packs, but right now, all Beca could see was its eyes.

She didn’t say anything, but she couldn’t’ help but notice how human they were. How they scanned her up and down and clouded over in a bout of fear. A sly whimper escaped its throat as Jessica took a slight step back. It was apparent that this was the first reaction she had to anything.

The veterinarian steeled herself as she easily found a clear area to hear the heartbeat. The animal’s fur was coarse, but soft all at once. She took a deep breath, earning a clear eyebrow raise. Again, that was something so human.

“Her heart rate is elevated, but that’s normal considering the situation,” Beca mumbled, pulling back as she moved the instrument from her ears. “How long have you been here?”

She glanced at her assistant, the woman was dressed in long white pants with comical hearts all over them. They looked comfortable, but not enough to keep her warm. She wore an equally stark tank top, hugging into herself as her bag ridden eyes flashed towards her boss. “I don’t know, that man wouldn’t let me call you for at least forty minutes. Maybe an hour.”

“Go home. She’s going to be fine, nothing I can’t handle. I’ll give her some fluids and administer an IV. It’ll bring her heart rate down enough for me to feel comfortable to actually stitch her back leg up.”

“Doctor Mitchell-“

“That wasn’t a suggestion.” She gave her an easy smile “Does she look like a problem to you?”

The wolf stared down the assistant almost like it was a challenge. Those blue eyes looked like they held a grudge against the young woman for poking and prodding at her already broken frame.

“I suppose not.” Jessica relented. “Seriously call me if you need anything. I’ll be back in a few hours.”

Beca said her goodbye to the woman, having to urge her to climb into her Honda and eventually drive away. She was loyal and Beca appreciated that, but she had no use for a woman that would yawn through a procedure as small as a couple of stitches. She worked silently as she changed her gloves and worked at preparing an IV.

She could tell that this animal didn’t like needles (Who did?). She stiffened under Beca’s gentle touch, but the woman found herself smoothing her hand over the animal’s large back, easing the instrument in much to the wolf’s dismay.

“Oh, don’t be such a drama queen.” She mumbled to her, earning a huff. And did she just roll her eyes? “You just got hit by a car. You can survive a little needle.”

The stitches weren’t as disastrous, the fluids working in tune with the IV to calm the wolf down into a placid state. Her breathing was slow, and the auburn-colored animal seemed to be falling asleep. It was an easy fix once the blood had stopped flowing.

After about an hour of monitoring the wolf and paying close attention to how the California sun peaked above the clouds in the slightest way against the blinds- she realized that actual staff would start to show up in a bit. She risked it, slipping out of the room for a few seconds to change out of her pajama’s and into an extra pair of scrubs she always kept behind her desk for times like these. They were black, but they did the trick in a pinch.

She was careful as she set up a pot of coffee and darted her eyes to the clock. It was nearly five in the morning. Beca palmed the plain cup of caffeine and shuffled back to the exam room. It couldn’t’ hurt to just stay in there. It’s not like she had other patients to attend to. The whole entire place was empty aside from a small litter of kittens that were under constant surveillance by her partner.

The door creaked open slightly, Beca focused on not letting her overfilled mug scald the edges of her palm. She hadn’t looked up- but she did, her efforts seemed useless. The mug dropped from her fingers and shattered into half a million pieces.

She was gone for ten minutes, but the wolf wasn’t there anymore. The table was far from empty, a young woman, a naked young woman was in the animal’s place. Still asleep against the light that slowly filled the area. Beca flinched at the scalding coffee that splashed up against her legs, breath catching as the stranger began to stir.

The vet had to admit, she was gorgeous, not that she let her eyes stray too much. Her body dipped and curved as her fingers curled up against her mid-section. Beca’s mouth was dry as she caught glimpse of the IV that was still pushed evenly into her side. The woman shared the same injuries as the large animal that was once in her place- perfect features contorting into pain as her eyes fluttered open; blue and human.

Beca thought her heart had stopped, her back pressed so hard against the door behind her that the doorknob was part of her spine now. Her pulse was strong against her wrist as she picked up her breathing.

“Fuck,” The woman blinked at the light filling her vision, realizing she wasn’t anywhere she knew. She panicked, not by much, her injuries stopping her from springing up, but not from flashing towards the only other noise in the room; Beca. “Fuck!”

“Don’t move,” Beca squeaked out, half because she didn’t’ want the woman any closer, but another part of her entirely worried about the damage she would do to stitches Beca had administered herself. “You just…”

“Got hit by a car, yeah.” The stranger rasped out, she didn’t’ seem the least bit rebuffed about her state of nudity, carefully pulling herself up into a sitting position as she hissed out a breath “I recall you calling me a drama queen.”

“Oh.”

Yeah, that confirmed it. Beca thought she was going mad. The way she had worked herself half to death to get to a place that would allow her to pirate half of her own practice had driven her to complete insanity. If she was seeing things correctly, then the woman in front of her was a thing of myth. Something that would blow down a straw house and chase after a woman in a red coat only to DVR the bachelor beforehand.

“You’ve done a lot for me,” She spoke simply, Beca didn’t interject when the girl stood shakily “But I was wondering if I could trouble you for some clothes. Maybe a blanket.”

“Yeah, dude.” It was a breathy mess.  

Part of her wanted to run the other way, but that wasn’t what her conscious would want her to do. Regardless of if this woman just morphed from beast to human in the span of ten minutes the second, the sun came out, she wasn’t going to send her out onto California’s busy streets without a covering of some sort.

The stranger had successfully pulled the IV from her hand with little to no blood by the time Beca got back. She rubbed the spot simply, trying to ease the sting as she pulled the sweatshirt that Beca had arrived in over her head before knotting the sweatpants over her mid-section.

She had a bit of a lazy smile on her face, a streak of dirt clouding her features as she shifted uneasily. She was goofily adorable, Beca’s heartbeat still pounding unevenly against her throat as she let out a simple breath.

“You’re not going to call animal control, are you?”

“I don’t think so.”  

“What about a psych ward?”

“Only to check myself in.”

This made the girl giggle. The large beast that could have torn her throat out in a single second was laughing as a thin layer of blush clouded her cheeks. “I like you.”

“I’m glad,” Beca found herself letting out a nervous huff of air “you owe me a lot of money. I charge interest.”

“How about we start with a cup of coffee considering you just spilled yours?”

Beca glanced down at the muddy brown stain on the floor. A cup of coffee would be nice, but this woman was just hit by a truck at full speed. There was no way that her sunken in eyes and pale sweaty skin was a side effect of waking up in a human form. “How about we start with getting you home instead. You look dreadful.”

“You know how to make a good first impression, Doctor Mitchell. I didn’t’ think you were a people doctor?”

“You’re not a people,” Beca squinted, eyebrow raised.

She couldn’t tell if that was offensive or not, but the stranger wasn’t deterred in the slightest. Maybe it was a wolf thing, or maybe it was just the gorgeous woman’s personality. But either way, she relented, leaning heavily against the table. Beca could tell that she was keeping up an act, a cold sweat forming closer to her brow. “Your assistant just pulled into the parking lot.” She said in a hushed voice “What are we going to tell her?”

Beca scanned her eyes around the room frantically before she moved quickly around the room as the stranger watched. She scribbled out a note on one of the pads and kept it on the clear counter where she was sure Jessica would see it. She reached down, and piled the larger chunks of the coffee mug into her palm, dumping them into the trash can.

“we’ll go out the back door,” Beca said, somewhat desperate as she pulled open the exam door and pushed her shoulder against it. “It’s right through here-“ She paused, staring back at the woman. “Oh right, car.”

The stranger had scalding hot skin, Beca seeming to melt under it as she wrapped her arm around the girl’s midsection and pulled her closer, trying to keep her up. She smelled earthy and strong, it made Beca’s throat tingle as they reached the cold air against the edge of the brick building.

Beca pressed her fingers against her lips, keeping the stranger quiet as Jessica pushed her keys into the front door. She considered herself lucky for parking so sloppily in the middle of the night. It straddled the side of the building.

“Why are you helping me?” The woman asked in a frantic whisper as Beca resumed her place pulling the girl close.

“Don’t know.”

“How do you know I’m not dangerous?”

Beca leaned her against the side of the truck, fishing for her keys as she panted into the cold morning. Her nose was raw, and her stomach was dropping, but none of that seemed to matter. She could almost smell the blood that was dripping from the now torn stitches on the stranger’s hip.

“I don’t.”  

[chickenfetus]

ALL MY EGG (and for the four names: jae, killer kang, minhyuk (whichever one), and santa

deadass i did the 100 questions ask meme for this ask and almost posted it rip

🐰 what is one secret that you’ve never told anyone?

theres literally nothing i dont even know what to say ???? 

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?

not 2 be delusional but i would give up my world to hug changkyun

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why?

glaceon is UP THERE idk why honestly but the sinnoh games were my first and i just??? i was really into ice and snow and shit u know so glaceon... thakn u

another pkmn ill always have is lucario ????? its just so cool?????

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like?

hopefully forgiveness and like???? acknowledging mistakes and learning from those u know jst positive stuff and like?? water. god i love water

👀 what was the most recent vivid dream that you had?

hm okay i think this one was from last night or the night b4??? and like???? idk???? i dont even know how 2 start tbh?

so im like hanging over at this two kid’s im a kid 2 i think place and idk we just talk and shit??? idk whomst the boys were tho

and then we get to a scene where its like??? at a train station???? and i go to the washroom to shit or smth idk thankfully i didnt shit myself irl

then i have to get onto the train which isnt even a train its like a carousel with seats??? and its like on a train track boys this is 2 much and i forgot to get ready my train card thing so the guy (who i was p sure was evil) waited for me to remove it so i got onto the transportation device lmao

and then once im seated i remember i forgot my jacket so i make like hand movements 2 the creep and hes runnig 2 me with my jakcet but the ride’s way too fast so i yell and say ill come back for it even tho im p sure i wasnt going 2

after that i wke up wild

☀️ what do you like the most about your best friend?

i dont have a best friend and all of my friends have their own unique qualities if i went into a rant abt them rn this will b so long

😘 talk about your crush or partner

[minhyuk voice] theres none

💁 if someone was rude to you, would you be rude back?

ya bc im petty but it really depends on the person

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!)

my personality (the good parts)

my values

my taste in friends (my Big Friends are either geminis or scorpios good)

🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it?

the dark and bitch isnt gonna turn off her night light any time soon

🎁 what never fails to make you happy?

seeing my favourite happy, listening to the music i like 

💙 what annoys you about some people?

i jjust went into a full out rant abt this on the other reply so ill be quiet now

😤 do you get angry easily?

yeahhhhh 

🐇 what do you always daydream about?

my faves tbh

🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?

bad people , gone.

everybody only sends love and happy things on anon

i just want everyone 2 b nice & friendly wars of any sort dont exist and no one wants anybody dead

🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?

if u sent jae’s name earlier id have trouble so im glad

kiss: tihis is so fucking embarrassing wtf minhyku (mx) but only on the cheek basically everywhere except the lips or anyplace weird

befriend: brian :-0

kill: jae goodbye loser

marry: sanha we can yell every time we gotta turn the lights off

✈️ what is your dream city and why?

tokyo bc its NICE

☕️ talk about your ideal day

cant read

🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?

i suddenly thought of the word ambivore which made me think of the word vore i wanna delete im a both? mayb idk

💧 when was the last time you cried?

nov 3 bc my heart hurts whenever i see ppl being a bad friend

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment

oh worm

all alone - day6

with you - astro

dramarama - mx (even though it isnt out yet lmao)

run - bts (the superior bts song)

hellevator - / (i was rly gonna make this mixed languages but rip)

⚡️ if you had any superpower, what would it be and why?

to fly bc im basic

💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?

dont do that

💚 who are you jealous of and why?

nobody in general????????? 

💎 which one would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? why?

intelligence i have 2 live somehow what if my money gets stolen

🙊 what are you ashamed of?

my humor

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn?

i (barely) know chinese despite having 2 take it all my life legends only

i know english but im bad at that 2 and its my first language once again legends only

i wanna learn japanese and korean 

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be?

the cow from voltron 

☁️ talk about your dream universe.

weve already discussed this

💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?

oh w-0rm ok so im a regular anon on this persons blog and i wanted to send an ask but never got arnd doing it so im gonna send her one. soon/

🐬 if you could transform into any animal/magical creature, what would you be and why?

let me live my life as a furry and cat

🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike

are u ready 4 me to b the meanest person yet bc i sure am lets fucking go

so theres this girl. and i know her (unfortunately) and ive known her since like 4 years ago and back then she was already pretty shit tbh

she cried bc she had to sit in between the “weird” and “dirty” girls in our class and she headass cried in front of them and everyone just bc she didnt like the arrangement?? shes called the “dirty” girl disgusting before and has made fun of her in front of everybody its just bad :-/

now. fast forward 3 years and in addition to still being disrespectful and rude, she now vocalizes her weird fantasies for her “oppas”??? some examples: 

“when i go watch __ perform im gonna climb onto stage and then my mother and my future husband will fight for me” and she calls those kpop idols weird shit and basically sexualizes them/???? she says the weirdest fucking shit on her ig story and tags them??????? 

another thing. she went to korea nd took a picture of a complete stranger and posted it on her public ig and called him her “oppa” and said that they had a “fun day together” despite the guy not knowing her at all???? she posted the pic of him??? i still dont get it tbh 

she wasnt even being ironic at all??? she calls herself & classmates “autistic” whenever she/others do smth dumb or mess up and its just sososososo fucking wrong

being one of the people to see how shes basically grown from bad to worse is something i dont fucking enjoy and i jsut want to leave my class already lmao 

ok but there are times where i do appreciate her because sometimes the class will be rly quiet and the teacher is basically talking 2 themselves but she’ll always respond w/o fail so thats great but its only bc she talks so damn much 

i just got a flashback to when she “jokingly” said she wanted to be a trainee for the rest of her life how do i just. god

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately

we’ve once again already discussed this

🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now?

i wanted to be various things honestly?? ranging from an astronaut to a vet to an editor to an animator to other stuff i get influenced pretty easily so if i watch smth and i think its cool ill want 2 be that i guess?? ive been trying 2 get rid of that habit so now i have no clue what i wanna be

🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?

sweets and chocolate cake

🍑 what are you obsessed with?

drinking water and staying hydrated

making my friends laugh is great 2

💘 what happens to you when you’re stressed?

acne LMAO 

😪 what are you sick of?

the usual

🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?

i love scouting on sif and bandori so yeah 

💥 what are some unpopular opinions that you have?

lets not 

☔️ would you consider yourself a good person?

to a certain extent

😊 what do you like to do as hobbies?

use my phone???? send nice anons and comment on art/fics 

🎤 what’s the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?

none

🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it?

my tolerance for ppl’s shit is so low

🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored?

my ocs

🐻 what’s stopping you from chasing your dreams?

i dont have a dream hence myself

🌷 what’s your mbti personality and why do you think it suits you?

infpt i dont rmb shit but yeah

🐶 send me 3 fictional people and I’ll choose my favourite!

falen i dont rmb what u sent

👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?

i dont follow any :-o zendaya has had my heart ever since shake it off tho

🐴 opinion on day6?

ur rly gonna do this 2m e?

all alone just started playng this is terrible lets get it

so day6. a band i only found out about in late june (thank u boxy) and before this i only ever listened to bts and mx bc my friends stan them so i thought i was gonna expect boys dancing, the usual. 

i clicked i smile and i lost my fucking shit as soon as i saw the instruments because prior to day6 i was a big 5sos fan so this was rly resonating to me tbh and i was just !!! so fukcng excited??? i never intended to even get into day6 honestly??? but after witnessing how good they are and watching about all of the available mvs at that point i was completely in awe so i caved a created a stan twitter for them.

now, this isnt even the most of it. after becoming a fan i realized how much more these 5 boys are. they compose (if im not wrong) and brian writes lyrics for the songs each month because of their everyday6 project and again, im wow-ed because??? the amount of dedication???? they went from releasing 2 title tracks in 2 years to releasing 12 title tracks and 12 bside tracks in a single year. they havent released the december song yet but haviing to work on 2 or more songs in 4 weeks is fucking amazing if you ask me. 

theyre really talented and theyre just so versatile (am i using that word correctly) and each month their songs sound different. this project has given them the opportunity to try new things and you can hear the steady improvement in each of their vocals (dowoonie not so much since he barely gets lines, but we all know hes working hard) and if you listen to their debut song - kongchu and compare it to the version they released along with sunrise it just???? the drumming has even changed from the original version nd its so noticeable that whenever i hear kongchu from 2015 i know its the old ver

to add to those, they do vlives every week and although those vlives are always scheduled it still makes my day seeing them and watching them do the usual. 

one thing im upset about is that how they barely promote themselves, they rarely get on variety shows (the most is individual schedules) and we, as mydays never really get to know the boys so its harder to fall for them as a whole. i dont know if its jyp or day6′s decision but if this is how they want to be known for - their music only, then so be it. we still have jae’s presence on youtube, music access and asc. thats the most we can get and it makes it difficult for us to learn about the rest but thats okay.

another thing. their concerts are something i always look forward to (even though my interest has died down a bit;) their concerts are just so fun to listen to?? there’ll always be mydays who stream the concert so everyone else can listen to them play and they sound so good live it drives me crazy. mydays are always so hyped and whenever mydays sing along it just gives me goosebumps??? bc theyre so???? good????? 

tldr; day6 deserve more, following wise and promotions wise because they work so hard and once this project ends i hope they’ll manage to rest but still remain as a presence that will be known instead of returning to jyp’s dungeon.

🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person?

there are days where i am more emotional than usual 

📚 share 3 books that you love and your favourite quote from them.

this is tiring

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?

i sleep and boy it really helps

😌 what thoughts keep you going when you’re sad?

rest

🌍 which country do you live in?

singapore

🐧 describe yourself in 3 words

lame funny swag

🐵 which quotes changed you?

“rocky swag” - park minhyuk, 2017

💭 do you keep a diary?

nope

💫 who inspires you?

brian kang 

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?

yes bc i love losing sleep

🎀 what’s your fashion sense like?

terrible

🎬 what are some of your favourite films?

i watched spiderman homecoming and i have no idea why i didnt see the plot twist coming but its GOOD watch it

🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?

theres none lads

🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?

all my internet buddies but sometimes i dont want to bc im kinda....gross

[inkarsterated]

Okay I have a lot of people asking me about this so I'm going to just do one big master post here and that'll be a lot easier on me than retyping and reliving this experience several times.

My cat, Garet, is my best friend. I've had him for about 12 years now, had him his entire life. When I had no friends or parents, I had Garet. Garet's my best pal and has been for a good half of my life now, and has always been there for me- being depressed, angry, suicidal, stressed, etc etc. All I can really stress is that my cat is my therapy animal and I wouldn't be here today without him.

Going on around three days now, Garet hasn't been eating or drinking. Two nights ago he vomited six times in less than an hour, and decided he didn't want to move anymore. He slept on the floor and didn't move from his spot, which is odd. He usually likes to be let in and out of the room at night. I was concerned, but I was able to coax him into eating a few pieces of kibble, so I had hopes that he would get better. I kept an eye on him and he still managed to move a few times, and he would still talk to me and respond to pats.

Well even after another day, he still wasn't interested in food or water, so off to the vet we went. His bloodwork was normal, his examination was normal minus a single cavity and a possible heart murmur, and so it was time for the first xray.

The xray was...odd. I saw it myself and even being more experienced with human x rays, it was obvious that something was off. There was something glowing like a mineral off to the left of his spine, almost like it was being pushed away from the rest of his organs. The vet was perplexed, which was the reason she had me come back to look in the first place, and so queue the anxiety because at this point it was kind of "what the fuck." The vet (who is the sweetest and lovliest vet I have ever known, who took care of Nux a year and a half ago) was really understanding and took a LOT of time with us. She called in the ultrasound tech this morning to get a better look at whatever it was on the xray, so I went back in this morning.

This morning was hard. Not only did I have to miss work (and thus, a day's worth of wages) but I also had to go in alone on a flat tire (MORE good news!) and try not to cry again in the vet office! Woohoo! I mean I saw a ferret so that was nice The Ultrasound doc was amazing, very thorough, I got to help out with it, and it seemed pretty...? Obvious that he's got a blockage going on in his gut, but one that's permeable. So it wasn't building up at all, but it seems like now it's causing issues.

So the options were to hospitalize him overnight and push fluids to try to dislodge this thing, orrrrr go straight to exploratory surgery. Which I really, really desperately don't want to do. So now, $1400 later, Garet's at the vet's office overnight with an IV in to try to flush this thing out. They did do another xray before I left and it LOOKED??? like the blockage had moved?? But it's not certain. With all the fluids though, maybe there will be some good news. But as it is right now, Garet hasn't eaten in over 3 days or drank anything of his own free will.

If nothing happens overnight, the only option left is the $2500 surgery, and that is something I will have to figure out tomorrow (the 1st of August) if nothing happens. That's it- I just needed a break from typing this story out a million times. .n. I'm not going to start a gofundme, and there's only so low my commission prices can go before it's literally costing me money and mental health to work. I have a paypal for the ones who have asked

I just need my cat to be okay.

[cloudedstudies]

 tagged by @ubestudies !! go check them out!!

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people

LAST:

1. Drink: peppermint tea, but im currently drinking lavender (the tea train never stops lmao) 2. Phone call: ?? i dont do phone calls or texting lmao, but probably calling my friend by accident 3. Text message: my mom asking if i had to feed the dog or if she did it before she left 4. Song you listened to: we found two dead swans and filled their bodies with flowers by teen suicide 5. Time you cried: today lmao (but like i NEVER cry and when i do its a couple tears and completely silent so it doesnt even count)

HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: havent even dated someone once 😎 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: again, havent kissed anyone 8. Been cheated on: i havent been in a relationship so 9. Lost someone special: no 10. Been depressed: yeah, ever since like fifth grade dude 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: no but i wish lmao

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 12-14: dark green, metalic gold, and sunset yellow

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: nope, i go to a small school which has like 40 people in my grade so ive already clicked w who im gonna click with 16. Fallen out of love: no, but ive gotten over a depended (yay me!!) 17. Laughed until you cried: yeah 18. Found out someone was talking about you: no 19. Met someone who changed you: no 20. Found out who your friends are: what does this mean??  21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: 1) i dont have a facebook 20 ive never kissed anyone

GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: dont have a facebook 23. Do you have any pets: yeah, three cats and a dog 24. Do you want to change your name: y e s but i dont know to what 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: nothing, i hate my birthday (and any holiday/celebration) so i dont celebrate it 26. What time did you wake up: 8:45 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping cause my parents turn off the wifi at fucking 10:30 and it makes me want to kill myself 28. Name something you can’t wait for: getting a new backpack

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like 30 mins ago 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: not having all these god damn chronic illnesses would be nice 31. What are you listening to right now: teen suicide come at me 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: nope 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: being told to get out of the bath when ive only been in there for 20 mins 34. Most visited websites: tumblr probably

LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME 35. Mole/s: i have tons, i got them from my grandma lmao 36. Mark/s: uhh what does this mean 37. Childhood dream: vet lmao generic af, then i wanted to be an astronaut  38. Hair color: red rn 39. Long or short hair: short 40. Do you have a crush on someone: nope, and i dont think ive ever had a crush lmao 41. What do you like about yourself: uhhh brain machine broke 42. Piercings: lobes and daith, though i want to get an industrial, double lobes, and tongue pierced 43. Blood type: i dont know but i think im an O based on my parents?? but idk how blood types work so 44. Nickname: i dont think i have one 45. Relationship status: single 46. Zodiac: aries 47. Pronouns: they/he 48. Favorite TV Show: uhh gravity falls or futurama or merlin

49. Tattoos: yes yes yes

50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: ear tubes when i was young, and i just had an endoscopy but idk if that counts as a surgery 52. Hair dyed in different color: yep 53. Sport: i used to do soccer and softball but then my asthma got bad n i started getting migraines so i couldnt continue (not that i wanted to) 55. Vacation: ?? 56. Pair of trainers: dark grey lace up vans or grey high top converse w painted toes by yours truly 

MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: uhh?? i dont really know what this is asking but i cant eat much cause of chronic illnesses so i kinda live off of a green smoothie and a cup of rice a day 58. Drinking: i wiiiiish 59. I’m about to: go to sleep at 8 pm 61. Waiting for: anything really 62. Want: my fucking head to stop hurting and for my laptop brightness to work so i can turn it down 63. Get married: idk, i guess if i find the right person but its a bit icky for me 64. Career: neuroscientist 

WHICH IS BETTER

65. Hugs or kisses: mmm no touching pls and thank 66. Lips or eyes: lips cause i cant make eye contact 67. Shorter or taller: i dont really care 68. Older or younger: older i guess?? 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: nice  t h i g h s  71. Sensitive or loud: bitch better not be loud 72. Hook up or relationship: not into the whole sex thing so relationship 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: neither??

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a Stranger: nope 75. Drank hard liquor: nope, but i have had some “accidental” sips of cocktails 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: yes 77. Turned someone down: i think 78. Sex on the first date: sex never thanks 79. Broken someone’s heart: uhhhh?? i dont think so?? 80. Had your heart broken: yeah  81. Been arrested: nope 82. Cried when someone died: no 83. Fallen for a friend: not romantically but ive become dependent on many friends :))

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: nope 85. Miracles: idk 86. Love at first sight: not really 87. Santa Claus: no 88. Kiss on the first date: um depends on how long ive known them for 

OTHER: 90. Current best friend name: i love all my friends equally™ 91. Eye color: green 92. Favorite movie: i dont watch movies

NOW, TAG 20 PEOPLE:

 (im just doing ten sorry)

@studygranger @studyingjpg @inspiredtostudy @mssyblr @oiyama @ambedostudies @owlsanddaisychains @caeruleus-tales @studybutch @intellectys // and anyone else who wants to do this

[hoetron]

okay christ i got tagged in htis massive tag game by @mothable but i love a good ol challenge lets do this buckfucks

RULES: ANSWER THESE 88, THEN TAG SOME PEOPLE

BASICS:

a. NAME AND PRONOUNS: Rae, she/her

b. AGE (and birthday!): 13, Aug 28th :3c im a fucking fetus ny’all

c. SEXUALITY: am i bi? am i lesbian? am i just craving existential death 24/7? i dont fucking know a thing my guy

d. GENDER: cis female hooooh

e. COUNTRY: AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OI OI OI

f. FAVORITE AESTHETIC: pastel colours and really nice fashion i guess..??? (also smoking is kind of aesthetic eyes emoji eyes emoji)

TRIGGERS/MENTAL ILLNESSES: i’m not actually sure :x

THE LAST:

1. DRINK: salt water hah normal water is for the WEAK (dont drink salt water please im begging y

2. PHONE CALL: my brother asking what kind of pizza i wanted

3. TEXT MESSAGE: “:3c” im such a fufcking furry...fuckck,,,,

4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: Daydream warriors by Aquors listen nyall im reconnecting with my hidden buried weebass side of me okay im crying

5. THE TIME YOU CRIED: i dont actually remember? probably like last year unless you count me having tears from laughing too hard as cryng then thats yesterday during the meme aka now called lightning mcqueen server

HAVE YOU:

6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: nahh

7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: dont think ive ever kissed someone thats not my family before im #Pure

8. BEEN CHEATED ON: nope lmao

9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: my grandfather i guess? but he died when i was really young so at that time i didnt really undersyand the feeling of loss and mourn so ksdjfk but we had some goodass memories together

10. BEEN DEPRESSED: they ask you how you are and you just have to say that you’re fine when you’re not really fine but you just cant get into it because they would never understa

11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: im severely underaged please

TOP 3 FAVORITE COLORS

12. red

13. yellow

14. either black or lavendar,,

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: yis

16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE: ya,,

17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: okay im known as the most giggly person in class i laugh so easily that i easily have tears over everything

18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: nahh dont think i wanna know if its like in a bad way :x

19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: aw y e s

20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: ya :,) (Thanks em, lily, mae and imogen for making this year truly greater than last year and for being the best friends i could ever ask for)

21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: facebook is dead to me

GENERAL

22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: serious facebook is dead to me i roasted above the flames of negligence (also because i have like two facebook accounts one using my pesonal email and the other using my more general email , the one using my more general email keeps recommending to me my OWN personal account and its personally so hilarious)

23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: a cat called lucky! (i love him even though im p sure he hates me)

24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: i guess my irl name uhhh im 50-50 with it? but granted on the internet i waaay prefer using the name Rae over my irl one because its short and simple and nice-

25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOU LAST BIRTHDAY: just want to a chinese resturant with my fam and my uncle because we’re simple that way and like. back then i didnt had that much friends so uh l m a o (but vidhi gave me a nerf gun so that was Really Cool and i love her)

26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP TODAY: 9 oclocK BECAUSE A HOUSING AGENT WAS COMING OVER (but then i fell back to sleep and woke up at 12 so lmao)

27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: watching a video on why ‘anime art isnt technically allowed in art school’ because i was just curious and then drawing 

28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: VOLTRON LEGENDARY FUCKNG DEFENDERS SEASON 3 SHIT BABES IM REA LLY FUCKING PREPARED AND NEAR END OF MONTH AVCON BECAUSE EYES EMOJI

29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: an hour ago lmao shes like just outside my room 

30. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU COULD CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE: sighs my shyness and social anxiety and awkwardness (all three of those are counted in a pack right? the pack of “socially inept” people)

31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: daydream warriors... by aquors..... (listen im RECONNECTING with my weeb side like said above im actually weeping)

32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: uh idk mate

33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: i havent brushed my teeth yet but im lazy to move my legs lmao

LOST QUESTIONS

34. MOLE(S): um quite a lot like a few small ones on my arm and like one on my face below my right eye and theres one underneath my boob i think lmao tmi and the rest i cant be bothered to find

35. MARK(S): a kind of burnt scar mark on my left shoulder from like 6/7 years ago when i got too close to someone smoking and their cigarette burnt me oh and a scar on my knee from the time i fell off my bike while playing bike catching in the neighbourhood with a couple of other friends like 4 years ago?

36. CHILDHOOD DREAM: vet (now im eh about that tho im probably just going to pursue some art career)

37. HAIR COLOR: brown eyy

38. LONG OR SHORT HAIR: long

39. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: yeah. hopefully its dying down now especially since the person is straight (its hard when she sits next to you in class and you guys are sort of friends now and u somehow feel really satisfied when you make her laugh :,) shit )

40. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: im generally kind with people regardless of whether or not i dont like them or i dont know them well or i know them i guess? (at least in my group of friends im probably the most willing to socialise with others) and uhhhh i guess i can make people laugh? im a huge fucking loser meme nyall

41. PIERCINGS: none and personally dont really want to 

42. BLOODTYPE: shit  i think it was either a B or an O i cant remember (i think its B tho)

43. NICKNAME(S): maggie, migi, bela, bob, bobbo

44. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: single pringle 

45. ZODIAC: virgo

46. PRONOUNS: she/her (lmao yay for repeated question)

47. FAVORITE TV SHOW: fuckngin,,, voltron,,, (probably going to stay my favourite for a long while tho)

48. TATTOOS: none atm (unless you count waterbase tattos then yes stick all the water based tattos on me) but like when im Much Older maybe? just a really small tattoo tho not anything big that covers an entire limb

49. RIGHT OR LEFT HAND: right

50. SURGERY: had a surgery on my foot forgot which side when i was in kindergarten because the skin was *censored for tmi* and yah stitching up your skin fucking hurt babes

51. HAIR DYED A DIFFERENT COLOR: nahhh i dont think id dye my hair tho who knows

52. SPORT: im probably going to retake up basketball again eyes emoji eyes emoji

53. VACATION: ooMMF nothing planned so far

54. PAIR OF TRAINERS: like uhhh what kind of sneakers?? just normal canvas sneakers i guess????? im, what.

MORE GENERAL

55. EATING: OXYGEn

56. DRINKING: IN OXYGEN

57. I’M ABOUT TO: complete this fucking 88  questions then chat on discord and scroll tumblr and tell myself “hey finish up your art!” but then 5 hours later im still scrolling tumblr. oh and im watching wonder woman later so :3c

58. WAITING FOR: nothing atm i guess?

59. WANT: my family’s financial situation to be solved and so that money isnt going to be a huge bother anymore...

60. GET MARRIED: sounds nice but probably only marriage idk the idea of kids doesnt really sound v appealing atm

61. CAREER: artist! (i wanna either work in a game development team or an animation studio eyes emoji ) 

62. HUGS OR KISSES: HUGS

63. LIPS OR EYES: lips erally nice to draw really nice to look at

64. SHORTER OR TALLER: buhhh im short so i guess taller would be nice (tall people have such nice legs too im frankly a little jealous)

65. OLDER OR YOUNGER: what is this in regards to

66. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: arms so that dO YOU SEE THESE GUNS

67. SENSITIVE OR LOUD: shrug emoji idk man

68. HOOK UP OR RELATIONSHIP: relationship

69. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: troublemaker pardnyars in crime amirite

HAVE YOUR EVER:

70. KISSED A STRANGER: no

71. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: nope 

72. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: yeah p sure i had to go through a whole day of school half blind once without my glasses

73. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: nah..

74. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: nO IM 1 3 

75. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: dont think so?

76. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: nah babes

77. BEEN ARRESTED: nah

78. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: somehow when someone dies i decide to laugh instead of breaking down in tears i guess laugh away the pain?

79. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: ...shit its a bad idea babes dont do it

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

80. YOURSELF: shrug emoji

81. MIRACLES: sometimes? sometimes no?

82. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: even bigger shrug emoji

83. SANTA CLAUS: nah lmao listen i caught my father and mother wheeling in bicycles for my sister and i when i was like what 8? usually i just played along because hey i was a child

84. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: ehh depends i guess

85. ANGELS: not really lmao

OTHER

86. CURRENT BEST FRIENDS NAME(S): Emily, Mae Shuen and Lily

87. EYECOLOR: dark brown?

88. FAVORITE MOVIE: this changes all the time

only tagging uhhh @pluminkdot (KASJD I FORGOT IF YOU HAD A MAIN REBLOG ACC IM SORRY RACH), @jaspereffect , @blabrabs / @spaceboomerang (it isnt letting me tag ur main boomers skldfjksd) and uh im too lazy for the rest

[luziflor]

Update (long post)

So I wouldnt say I was astral projecting today. Much more of lighly travelling up there and getting to some sort of inbetween spot between here and there, maybe?

Background: Years ago in my coven my mentor had us do a meditation exercise. We would visualize roots growing from where we stood, and tree branches growing up from us. It would lead you into a starry space, and she taught us to put up a ward and shield there. You would then travel into the tree to get to something that was supposed to be a personal temple, to meet with your deities and such. Not really the same as astral home. So im gonna like.... push it up there. Or something. Point is, I have a home thing already its just not really in the right location yet, but is close-ish maybe. Another problem i have with this though is that I used to be into thoughtforms. I had a few, and they had pet dragons. We had a lovely home with lots of wooded areas and a sea and everything. I could tell that one was strictly in my head at the time though, as I used to get severe headaches and even feel the energy in my brain severely shift. Thats a different story, but causes me to again question if im actually doing anything or just creating more thats only my brain (then again, ive heard of egregores being able to see egregores of others or travel to their homes.... ). Clearly, I have some things to work through.

About the home/temple that was already there - literally was created by 16 year old me after seeing an aesthetic pic on tumblr. Maybe I can find it again but I really doubt it. Anyways, the inside is light and dark blue marble. It has gold accents, and greek styled columns. The whole thing is really an old greek looking place. I recall I had a waterfall or something in there that would cause severe damage to a real house but I liked the look so it didnt bother me. There is a white greek statue of a woman in there but I could not tell you who it is. To the left there is an altar. The original was above a stone fireplace.

How its been updated: Same color scheme, theme, and random statue. The water feature was changed though, now its a small pond outside my house with a mini rock waterfall. Like for turtles. My altar is now a weird wooden desk bookshelf hybrid, that doesnt fit the theme at all. But its pretty. And I added a pet altar, it came to me as a wooden slab on metal legs or something, and it has wings that fold upward on it. Very cheesy but its a lovely piece, so I let it be. It has constant offerings of meat, water, and leaves or veggies to my passed away pets. I´ve also made it so they have a space where they can come and go as they please. I was also interacting with my deities and like uh hey guys u can make your own rooms if you want, just follow normal human rules. And I dont think any of them except Hecate did, and she did it immediately hahahah. But its not something I expected from her, though I am new to her as well. She made one that is kind of like a cave? And it had glowing amber light from the inside, and a gold metal accent piece at the top. She placed it very close to my altar but not rudely close. Apparently theres also a kitchen in there but its much more modern looking, and I got blocked from going in there (see below). I added new shields and wards, and a symbol appeared to me but its not related to any deity or anything. It came as I was setting up the shield and looking for sigils too. Its at a weird angle, a bunch of buildings mostly sky scrapers on a flat street. Below it are one line going down, and two lines attached to it with arrows or something going out. I would also like to point out that I huge painted ball python wrapped itself around my house, but it only came in images and energy I cant actually see it on the house.

Experience this time: Went in, established my being there. Looked around, was mostly the same as when I left it though some features such as my altar and water had been changed. Basically anything that worked with elements had disappeared really, or left behind a mild energy and base to build off of again. 

Welcomed in my deities to talk to them. Had a great meeting with Zeus, Poseidon, Lilith, and for the first time, Hecate (though I have interacted with her already).

Hecate was the first I greeted. She had her hair in a nice smooth updo, and looked like an oil painting. Im still working on visualization, she didnt move much  but I heard her speaking and felt the energy. She also had a golden bird metal band in her hair, which surprised me as well. Shes very nice so far, though i find it funny that she, mother of witches, had to put her room right next to my altar (which only has one side available). I thanked her for her work with me so far, especially as my oldest dog passed just recently, and I have another one whos young and sick now (he is much better today!).

Then was Lilith. When i first saw her, she was old and cranky but none the less friendly to me. Just kinda like a grandma with a temper. That had been in winter. Now as it is summer here (or spring? guate is weird), she came to me as a woman who had to be 19-early 20s. She had light olive skin, and swamp green eyes with slit pupils. She had brown loose curled hair that was every so slightly frizzy and very full. She was full human, but this time her body was super limber and a bit long like a snake. She was in a plain white dress, but it was like you could feel that her abdomen had a very specific shape that was like a snake. She was lovely, very kind, and patient with me as always. She is sweet but definitely has a jokester and teasing energy about her. After I left her, a huge californian king snake wrapped itself up around my shoulders just to chill, and I felt his scales moving across my shoulder. I havent held a snake in years, and I know for a fact my old cal king has died.

Next was Zeus. He is so much like a father figure to me, and he was very cheerful. Unfortunately because I havent really met up with him in a very long time, he looked to me like the animated Neptune from Little Mermaid. Yeeaah, sorry man. But he was fine none the less. We have a good relationship, he was glad to see me reaching out to them again. Even though I could not see him as he is for me, I could feel his energy. For me he is very hearty, and big. Its like santa clause with an attitude problem. (sorry pops)

Finally, Neptune/Poseidon. This one has been confusing for me as he presents himself to me as both. First it was more of Neptune, but now more of Poseidon. While Zeus is more like a father to me, Poseidon is the one that has all of my interests or is coincidentally related to weird things that happen to me. While Zeus has always been like a father, Zeus and I were more detached to begin with. But Poseidon was always the sweet uncle who related to what I liked and taught me valuable lessons. Today I saw him and felt him at the time, but once I was recording it in my journal I forgot almost everything about the experience other than it was super nice. 

There was some point where I had looked down, and noticed I had on partial armor in the color of gold on my legs and on my lower arms. Then I saw light dusty blue fabric draped over my arm, and more detail came from there. I was somehow wearing a stereotypical greek dress, but also bits of gold armor. I looked into a mirror and also saw that I had on a golden crown which felt a bit much in my tastes, but it was lovely so I kept it anyways! 

I saw my old dog Molly in there, though we didnt interact. Muffin, my recently passed, was there too. And I met up with her, and while I cant for sure say it was her it was good to have a few moments where I felt like I was playing with her again and hearing her weird snorts she makes when shes happy. My physical body had started crying after that. I could feel her bones again, if it was her shes happy but needs some serious vetting, which is probably the case anyways. Hopefully the offerings and me getting more experienced will help as time goes on. 

In my pet altar, I opened the drawer and found pictures. The only one I could really make out was one of my passed kitten, Possum. Possum had been a soul mate of a cat for me, ive never felt a connection like that before. And when he was passing away in the middle of the night across my whole house, I woke up for no reason not feeling tired at all. Then something told me to go outside because I had to go get him. He died a few hours after that, and im broken hearted to this day. 

At the beginning of this whole thing, I created an athame. Its based off of the ones they sell here but I have yet to actually get my hands on. Its made of metal and stone, and the tip of the handle has a tigers head. This one is a regular athame but I was immediately moved to make it into something to defend me from malicious spirits as well. I immediately slipped it into a knife holder that happened to be around my waist.

I was going to the kitchen, as my deities had left, there were no pets running around in there (maybe Muffin, but I had been interuppted in the physical world so our session broke off), so I was lonely and wanted to explore. I immediately felt blocked from going in there, and a black figure flew out at me. I felt just about nothing from this experience so I dont think that part was real (and I will go into more detail about this in a second). I grabbed my knife, stabbed it in the head, and the spirit was passed out or whatever for a second. I took it outside and realized I could removed the black around it, it was just cloth. It was what appeared to be some sort of white teenager, but the look of him really made me feel like he was not modern times. I dont know. Ive never seen him before either, and again, I didnt feel any panic from this at all. Only when i got blocked from the kitchen.

When I had egregores, I had a nice home for them. But in the upstairs I would hate going to because a black figure would come up to me. I would feel panic and even feel this in the physical realm sometimes. It is not around me anymore I dont think, or if it is, its only kept in my mind so its something personal I would assume. He was banished long ago, I changed their house, and didnt see him ever again. I questioned that experience at the time but it felt more real than the one I had earlier today. I dont know. 

Long story short- met up with the deities, Hecate had to put her room next to my altar, new guards up, snake things happened, might have killed a spirit but maybe nah, maybe hung out with my deceased dog for just a few seconds.

[adventuresaroundasia]

This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info. 

Pin Me!

It’s been quite a while since I’ve done the Freedom Life monthly recaps, but I decided it’s finally time to get back into it! That said, I may or may not have started writing this post with the intent of it just being a July monthly recap and then… got too busy to finish it. Story of my life…

So anyway, here’s what I was up to this summer living in Tbilisi, Georgia!

On the way to Kazbegi!

What I Was Up To This Summer

Over the last two months, I’ve been very busy! Firstly, Chris and I took a quick weekend trip to Kazbegi along the Georgia Military Highway!

In addition to that small trip, I attended a baby shower, prevented my cat from dying via surgery, rescued a NEW kitten, launched a new website with Chris, and more!

**For those of you who are concerned about me traveling during COVID-times, the Republic of Georgia handled the pandemic very well (we only had 17 deaths TOTAL) and things are really starting to open up. We did have a very strict mask protocol at the hotel though, and we specifically went to the countryside where we could explore with almost no people.

Where I Went in July

Tbilisi, Georgia

Mtskheta, Georgia

Pasanauri, Georgia

Kazbegi, Georgia

Sno, Georgia

Gudauri, Georgia

Gergeti Trinity Church is lit up behind me!

Highlights

Here are the best moments from July and August!

A Quick Trip to Kazbegi

After being cooped up in a small apartment for months and months, Chris and I were so excited to finally get out and see a bit more of Georgia. Unfortunately for us, we only had about 2 months to enjoy Georgia before lockdown, so aside from a quick wine tasting day trip, we really hadn’t seen much of the country!

Now that things are (almost) back to normal here, we decided to head to Kazbegi in the mountains near the Russian border. The lack of tourism has been really hard for all of these beautiful mountain towns, so it was nice to be able to provide some business while enjoying the fresh (and chilly) mountain air.

We booked a heavily discounted room at Rooms Hotel Kazbegi, which is one of the nicest local hotel chains in Georgia. It was so nice to take a few days away, and enjoy the beautiful view of the mountains and Gergeti Trinity Church.

Honestly, I think Kazbegi is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever been to in my life.

The Russia Georgia Friendship Monument!

Driving the Georgian Military Highway

Driving to and from Kazbegi was an adventure in and of itself! We hired an awesome driver named Timo from GoTrip.ge, who not only stopped at all the major sights along the Georgian Military Highway, he also suggested additional stops and activities for us!

On the way to Kazbegi, we had the opportunity to visit Mtskheta to see the beautiful Svetitskhoveli Cathedral in town and the Jvari Monastery which sits up on a hill giving you an incredible view of the entire town.

We also stopped at the famous Ananuri Fortress, Pasanauri for their amazing khinkali dumplings, Sakuriani to drink mineral water from a natural spring just off the highway, an area just off the highway with “sticky rocks” you could climb up without slipping despite the slight waterfall, and of course, the Russia-Georgia Friendship Monument, which we had completely to ourselves!

On the way back a few days later, we stopped at Sno to see the famous carved head sculptures of Georgian poets, and we even got to take an hour-long cable car through the mountains to Gudauri! We really thought the cable car would be closed considering no one was there, but they let us ride which was such a fun surprise! That said, it was super weird to ride a cable car for an hour and see NO ONE.

Honestly, the trip to and from Kazbegi is amazing, and I’ll have to write a blog post about it soon!

Fruit Baby!

Attending my First Baby Shower

This July was my first experience attending a baby shower! Two of our friends are having a baby literally any day now, so it was very fun to be able to celebrate with them!

We played baby-themed trivia, ate tons of great food, and there was even a gender-reveal with cupcakes! I also loved being able to shop for a few cute baby things as a gift!

Chris and I Launched Multiple Nerdgasms

Over the last two months, Chris and I launched a brand new blog together: Multiple Nerdgasms! This is a site where we can talk about one of our other loves: Dungeons and Dragons. (Yes, we’re both giant nerds).

Chris has been DM’ing D&D games for 24 years (seriously), and I started playing a few years ago. While I used to play once every two weeks, during lockdown, I got involved in three different online D&D games!!

Chris and I thought it would be interesting to write about D&D from the perspective of both the player and the DM, as well as exploring both a male and female perspective. I’ve already written a few posts for the site, and set up social media accounts. I can’t wait to keep writing more!

Surprisingly, the very first post I wrote about gender equality and D&D actually got a lot of traction! People were sharing it on Twitter in women’s D&D groups, and many people reached out to me with their own stories of sexism in D&D. I even inspired a few men I know to create strong female characters.

it’s hard to get a good picture of him

I Rescued a Kitten

So at the end of August (aka last week), I may or may not have rescued ANOTHER cat. After coming home from a nice dinner out, Chris and I stepped out of the taxi and were immediately accosted by a 2-month-old kitten who wouldn’t stop meowing at us.

He looked fairly healthy, so we thought that there was a possibility he belonged to someone in the area, especially considering the fact that he kept running up to people, looking for help/food.

We were originally going to leave him because we didn’t want to take someone’s cat, and even if he was a stray, Georgia has a ton of street cats and kittens that do very well. We even waited for a solid 40-minutes just to see if we could find a mother or owner, but no one came for him.

But on the way home, this little kitten decided to follow us, almost getting hit by two different cars in the process! Worried that he wasn’t going to survive on his own outside, we decided to take him home until we could figure out where he belongs.

After a visit to the vet the next day, we learned that he is definitely a street kitten, but doesn’t have great street-smarts and was relying on people for food and attention. Now he’s happily at home with us and is probably the most loving kitten I’ve ever met in my life. So… welcome to the family?

Yasmina relaxing after her surgery

Challenges

This summer wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. Here’s what didn’t go so well…

My Cat Almost Died

If you didn’t already know, I’ve been fostering a cat named Yasmina for a few months now. She’s also a street rescue and has a ton of medical problems. At the beginning of the summer, Yasmina started to go really downhill. She was having a lot of trouble pooping, barely ate, slept constantly, and appeared to be in immense pain.

I kept taking her to the vet, who gave her IV treatments and lots of medicine, but she wasn’t getting any better. We even gave her an enema to try and clear out her bowels! (She hated it).

While my vet seemed great (and refused to take any money for any of these treatments?!!), she also didn’t speak English very well and couldn’t really take the time to fully explain to me what was wrong with Yasmina. I kept offering to pay her (seriously, she’s a saint), hoping she would give me more time, but even the paying clients were extremely rushed in this very busy clinic. I started feeling like it might be worth my time to go to a different vet that comes highly recommended from other expats in Tbilisi.

So after not hearing back from the original vet for a few days, and getting very worried about Yasmina not making it, I had Chris take her into the Veterinary Clinic at Georgia Agriculture University. Apparently, Yasmina is 8-10 years old NOT 2-3 like a vet originally told the girl who rescued her, and her biggest problem is not her kidneys, but the fact that she had a solid kilo of poop stuck in her intestine! She needed to undergo emergency surgery IMMEDIATELY and there was only a 50-50 shot she’d make it due to her age and medical problems.

On hearing this, I contacted the company I work for remotely and asked to have my remaining shift covered while I raced to get to the hospital to be there for her surgery. The entire surgery I was so nervous I felt sick! But thankfully she’s such a strong girl, she came out of surgery just fine, and has completely recovered!

I had to give her a lot of medicine, and take her in for IVs every day (and this vet clinic is NOT nearby my house…). I also have to feed her Royal Canin Gastrointestinal Wet food in 4 small servings a day which is not cheap.. but it’s a small price to pay for my fluffy baby!

As of now, Yasmina is a completely different cat. She’s constantly playing with toys, and went from barely ever making a sound to becoming an extremely talkative little lady. A little too talkative to be honest… 

At least I have khinkali

My Course Launch Didn’t Go As Planned

As many of you know, I have an online course and coaching program called Teach Abroad Squad that helps people to be successful teaching abroad in China!

Understandably, this year has not been great for my business. With the Chinese borders closed and no end to COVID in sight, it’s been a tough year for me.

That said, I did have a very successful launch of my program in April! I had my highest grossing launch yet, and had a bunch of really awesome people join the program. I’ve been working with a business coach who has really helped me through the entire thing (from positioning for the pandemic to dealing with my many mindset issues about selling during this time).

So after that successful launch in April, I decided to do another one in July! I made the free webinar training even longer and better, and had just as many people sign up as I did in April. However, no one joined the program, despite many people seeming interested.

Honestly, this is not really something I wanted to be open about, because I felt really ashamed of the results. I have this fear that if I talk about the struggles I’ve had with my program this year, people will think Teach Abroad Squad isn’t a success and they won’t want to join.

But deep down, I know Teach Abroad Squad is an incredible course, and I have full confidence in it. It’s really just the current situation that’s made things very hard.

Back in April, people still had a lot of hope that the borders would be open by now. So investing in Teach Abroad Squad was a no-brainer! But now with the pandemic raging in many countries like the US with no end in sight, I have the feeling that many people are choosing to hold off until things become more stable.

That said, it doesn’t make my July launch any less disappointing! I put a ton of time and work into promoting Teach Abroad Squad, and sometimes it’s hard not to equate your business to your own self-worth. It’s definitely something I’m working on!

This failed launch has definitely given me the time and perspective to look at potentially creating a second program I’m really proud of, with a different topic that’s more relevant right now.

While I still love and fully support Teach Abroad Squad (I mean, we do live Q&A’s weekly and monthly Zoom Coaching Calls!), it might make the most sense for me to stop pushing it for the moment and focus some energy on a new topic. Now, just to figure out what that topic will be…

For those of you who are interested in Teach Abroad Squad, I’ve decided to put a hold on webinars and big promotions for now. So if you want to join, I’m leaving the cart wide open for you! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions! 

Drinking cocktails with social distancing in Kazbegi

Work Overload: Course Launch, Freelancing, and Interviewing!

Most of July and parts of August were EXTREMELY stressful for me. Earlier in the summer, I started a new part-time job interviewing Chinese students for their college admissions applications, which has been a great source of extra income, but also takes up a lot of the time I used to use to work on my blog and Teach Abroad Squad.

I also have a position working as a social media manager for my business coach Merilyn! Yes, I joined her Lead Your World program, and then she ended up hiring me a few months later to do Social Media! (I help run her Facebook Page and Facebook Group!)

Trying to do these two jobs, and run a launch for Teach Abroad Squad, while also running my cat to the vet 30 minutes outside of town DAILY… is a giant recipe for burnout.

I ended up having major pain in my jaw that’s only just now calming down. But wow, I really overloaded myself these last two months… hence, why this blog post never got published and it’s a 2-month recap!

Georgian bread and cheese on the balcony for brunch!

Major Payment Plan Issues

To make financial matters worse, I had a few people in my program ask me to postpone their payment plan payments by a month due to financial issues. While I wouldn’t normally allow this, I know COVID has been super rough for everyone, so I allowed the payments to be pushed back by a month and followed the instructions from MemberPress to put their payment plans on pause.

IT WAS A DISASTER.

Not only did the system charge them anyway, but it also created a second subscription for them when I turned their access back on, meaning it charged them TWICE the next month. WTF!

Unfortunately for me, MemberPress only does tech support via email (seriously! It’s a paid service!), and my tech support person literally had no idea what I did wrong when I sent them screenshots of my system. They eventually had to get more advanced tech support in the backend of my website to try and fix the problem. It was a complete nightmare and I’m still mad.

Look at them not killing each other!

Trying to Introduce My New Kitten

While I’ve loved having my new kitten Mordie, my older cat Yasmina has NOT been happy. We’ve had to keep Mordie in the bathroom while Yasmina gets accustomed to him, and then we bring him into the bedroom to hang out for large chunks during the day and evening.

I know this is normal, but we have a very small apartment, and keeping them separate has been hard!

Not to mention, Yasmina was pissed at ME for bringing him home. She’d even smell his scent on my hand and growl at me. One day Mordie escaped into the living room and she was so mad she slapped me in the face! She also completely refused to come in the bedroom because it smelled like him, and hissed at me the one time I brought her in there.

Finally, after a week she’s starting to come around. They even napped next to each other on the bed today and she only hissed at him if he tried to come within a foot of her. Baby steps!

Here’s a Georgian tomato and cucumber salad with walnut paste

The USA is a Giant Mess

I could write an entire post on this, but this summer has really showcased that the US has some big problems they need to fix. Firstly the way we’ve handled the pandemic is absolutely ridiculous (and this is coming from someone who lives in a country that locked down hard and only had 17 deaths nationally). Then on top of this, the police brutality and reactions towards the BLM movement is horrifying.

While I’m glad I’m in Georgia right now, there is definitely a part of me that wishes I was in the US so I could participate in the BLM protests to demand racial equality, police accountability, and justice for the many victims of police violence and racism.

I’ve been trying to do my part to help, and have the difficult conversations with the few people in my newsfeed (and on my Adventures Around Asia page!!) who just DON’T get it. While I would typically just block these people for my sanity, I’ve realized that this isn’t productive. But wow, is it EXHAUSTING to talk with people who refuse to recognize their own biases, and will literally never change their minds.

But every time I feel like I just want to walk away, I remember that many people don’t have the privilege to do so. I think many of us have felt exhausted, hurt, and angry these last few months, and I really hope the protests (and upcoming election) create some positive change for our country.

Hello Tbilisi!

Blog Posts I’ve Written Lately

Here are the blog posts I wrote and guest posts I published on Adventures Around Asia since my last major life update/recap!

Fun Fact: I’m a Huge Nerd

What It’s Like to Teach in China as a Black Woman (Guest Post)

Moving to China With Kids: Teaching Abroad With the Whole Family (Guest Post)

I’ve also written two blog posts for Multiple Nerdgasms!

Why I Always Play Female Characters in D&D

Tragic Backstories: 10 Subtle Traumas for Your D&D Backstory

Travel Product of the Month

This month I want to give a shoutout to my amazing Teva W Ysidro Sandals that have gotten me through the summer. Not only are these things super cute and go with pretty much every outfit, but they’re also SO comfortable and supportive. They even have extra cushioning on the ball and heel of the shoe!

I had a pair a few years ago that I literally wore to death, which is why I was so excited to get these for Christmas! Now that the weather is warm I can finally wear them.

This cat tried to eat our food for the entire meal.

What I’m Reading Now: Wisdom of the Enneagram

If you didn’t know, I’m more than a little obsessed with the Enneagram, a personality categorization and self-help tool. The Wisdom of the Enneagram is considered by many to be the “Enneagram Bible” and the book that you really need to read if you want to learn the Enneagram in-depth.

While I’ve owned Wisdom of the Enneagram for quite a while now and had read through most of it, I decided to start reading through from the beginning again now that I have a better understanding of the Enneagram. I’m also taking notes and highlighting important info!

I honestly feel like I’m back in college again and I don’t even mind. It’s always fun to learn something new!

Best Instagram Post

I took this one from the balcony door of my room at Rooms Hotel Kazbegi! Man, the view here is so amazing…

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by Richelle (@adventuresaroundasia) on Jul 25, 2020 at 4:24am PDT

What I’m Up to in September

To be honest, I don’t have any big plans for September, but there are a few things that I want you all to keep me accountable on!

Firstly, I plan to start writing a blog post EVERY WEEK on Adventures Around Asia. I know, right? I’ve been so horrible about writing since the pandemic started because I just haven’t felt the passion for travel right now (and neither does anyone else…).

My plan is to write every week about something I’m passionate about, whether or not it has anything to do with travel. To be honest, most of what I’ll say will at least be tangentially related to my life traveling and living abroad (because that’s my life!), but I’m not pressuring myself to write travel articles and teach abroad posts right now when I just really don’t feel inspired.

I hope you all enjoy my passion-led blog posts this autumn and keep me accountable if I haven’t posted anything in over a week!!

The Freedom Life: July + August 2020 This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.  It's been quite a while since I've done the…

[theheaterishotjournals]

06/16/2020

Statuses

Me: Alright, I guess? Feel stupid? I dunno. Numb? Depression numb?  Sunflower Charlie: So tall. Daniel can’t even reach the top. 7′ now?? Gonna bloom soon.  Sunflower George: Almost reaches Charlie. Rivals.  Sunflower Miriam: 4 blooms! Gonna get more. Bees all the time, so cute. Yellow jackets, less cute. But good for pest control.  Tomato: They’re starting to grow. More flowers coming. Needs pruning.  Mint: Needs pruning. Keeps getting eaten by bugs.  Money plant: After the sun burning, growing so many buds now. Growing nicely. Bigger pot??  Rubber Plant: Doing well.  Pachira: Better now that the fan isn’t pointing at it.  Palm: Surprisingly alive.  Succulents: All good.  Đậu Đen: She’s doing good. Healthy. God, I hope she ain’t pregnant. 

Dear you, 

Today I went to work, still depressed. Elliot was kind enough to ask how I was doing and give me advice. I love Elliot. I don’t care what the rest of the crew says. I’m thankful for him.

Ervin told me he had to call out on Friday as well. He has hypertension. He keeps eating red meat though. I’m worried about him. I wish he could stay forever but come August, a new rotation.

Jeff wore a new hat today. It was, like. A golf cap? Instead of his usual cowboy hat. It looked good on him! I also appreciate Jeff. 

Did runs. Easy day. Picked up Hydrogen Sulfide detector. The jambalaya Daniel made was so delicious. I love that he helps me get my lunch ready. I love Daniel. 

Daniel kept sending me pics of the kitten today. I was so excited to see her. The second work ended, I drove home and ran straight to her (after dealing with mail). She seemed so quiet and lazy. It got me worried. It surprised me to roll her over and see 12 toes on her hind legs. Daniel said not to worry, she was probably napping. I couldn’t help but worry. Worry’s my middle name. Thanks to anxiety. He was trying to get me to calm down and convincing me to eat. 

While eating, I tried to calm down. Told him to put on spongebob. But I kept thinking about what I had read online. The lethargy. Kittens were supposed to have energy. Her gums looked white. She meowed weakly. 

Daniel could tell I was worried. He went out and got Đậu Đen and brought her inside. We had her and her kitty meet. It looked like the kitty kept trying to rub up on her and Đậu Đen kept walking off. It made me cry, I thought she was trying to abandon her. Daniel calmed me down, saying I was just being reminded me of my childhood. Eventually, the kitten kept rubbing up on her mom and Đậu Đen kept licking her like crazy. I felt so much relief. 

We watched the two. The kitten kept weakly going up on her mom. Đậu Đen licked her, ate, and would walk off. I was wondering if we should get the kitten back to Đậu Đen but she wouldn’t take her. We called a hospital earlier, the hospital said hard to tell if it was an emergency and that walk ins would end soon. 

I still didn’t feel right. I looked up a 24 hour animal hospital. I told her she was weak. Then I thought about it and told Daniel to tell them the kitten seemed like she was breathing hard. They said it didn’t sound right. We loaded her up in the cat carrier and took her to the car. 

Đậu Đen walked with us, we tried to see if she wanted to come in the car with us. She didn’t. I figured ‘cause she had the other two kittens to worry about. We made off to the hospital. 

There was a car there before us. A white couple with a beagle. I noticed the girl wiping away tears. It was hard to see. I wondered if we were taking up valuable timer with our kitten. 

The hospital staff quickly came out and retrieved the kitten. We waited in the car. They quickly called us and said they needed a $500 deposit to get some vitals up. No info on what was wrong. I took a deep breath. I made a lot of money now but $500 was still nothing to sneeze at. I looked at Daniel, he said it was my money. I thought about how I had $2200 in checking and $3k in savings. I said to go for it. 

I took out my embroidery. We joked around. I listened to a podcast. I felt bad joking around while the girl in the car next to us was crying. 

Daniel and I had decided to name the cat. Noticing she was polydactyl on her hind legs, she had 12 toes total. Daniel decided to dub her Doce, the Spanish word for 12. I had named Đậu Đen so it only seemed fair to have one with a Viet name and one with a Spanish name. 

Another call. They took down some info, transferred me to the doctor for the low down. The doctor explained Doce had been infested with fleas. She was a tiny cat, less than 5 weeks. With not much blood to spare, the fleas had sucked her down to nearly nothing. She asked if I had fed her. I told her just sugar water that we fed with a plastic syringe like thing we had used to give Đậu Đen her antibiotics. Then some salmon/water cat treat. I was on the verge of tears telling her this. I thought the doctor was gonna get mad I couldn’t feed her enough.

The doctor merely asked if she ate those things. I told her she did, the cat had licked at them. I think it was a good sign, that it meant Doce still had some energy. The doctor said the kitten was in critical health, knocking on death’s door. It was a good thing we had brought her in. They asked if I was willing to care for the cat, I said I was. She transferred me to billing.

While we were on hold, I joked with Daniel I hope it wasn’t $2k, knowing how much I had in the bank. 

The billing went down. 

“The doctor would like to do this test, that is $200. Then a fecal test for parasites. Another $200.” 

As she listed the items, my stomach dropped. 

The kitten had to be in an oxygen tent. $500. Luckily, she was small so IV would be cheap. Cheap as in $130. Another several hundred for transfusion. Another several hundred for blood test. 

It went on and on and my stomach was clenched. 

“Total comes to around $2,008. Not including the $500 you had put in as deposit earlier. The complete total is $2,508. What would you like to do?”

Was it expectations? Was it my inability to turn people down? I said yes. But I mentioned that I did not have enough in the bank. The billing lady said I could apply for carecredit. 

I immediately remembered the first time I applied for carecredit. I was making $9,000 a year. I had severe dental problems and the dental bill was $1,200. I cried at the dentist’s office. I couldn’t afford it. CareCredit gave no interest for up to two years if you could pay within then. I was so thankful, I thanked them profusely even if they had nothing to do with it. 

I looked at Daniel. He shrugged and told me it was my money. 

With no hesitation, I went on my phone and applied. We called billing. It was all good. The nurse loved Doce’s name. Everyone marveled at the credit limit I was given. I felt somewhat good and happy about that. 

The hospital said we could go home. They handed us the bill. 4 weeks and 3 days, they estimated Doce’s age. 

Daniel went to go get the bill. The couple next to us, I guess they were finally called to bring the dog in. The guy opened the girl for the girl, banged the door on my car. I saw her cradle her dog and hurriedly left. I couldn’t care less they banged my car. I was mad, briefly, like, hey, wtf. Pay attention. But I saw the dog. Remember my car was dinged up anyways. Felt bad I was upset. Told Daniel. He also didn’t care, he also saw how they felt about their dog. 

On the way to get gas, I realized by the time we got home, I’d have nearly 0 hours to relax. I told him he couldn’t tell anyone I spent this much. He agreed. He could tell I felt ashamed. Told me it was my money. Not in a way he didn’t care. But that this was what I wanted to make money for. I wanted to care for others. I wanted to donate most of my money. I’m saving a cat and I was looking for a pet. This is perfect. I asked what if the doctor says the kitten belongs to her mom? He said he’ll try to ask the vet if there’s any way we can keep her. Since it seems she got infested with fleas. We’ll find a way.

I hope so. I hope we can keep her but I just want her to be happy and healthy.

I felt dumb and stupid and insane for dropping this much money on a stray cat I’ve just met. I had to talk to Nevi. Nevi calmed me down, said it wasn’t a waste. 12 years of a cat’s life, this was nothing. I saw my money and knew it wasn’t completely necessary for now. I budgeted for it. I saw the value of the money going toward the cat. He helps me so much. I love Nevi with all my heart as well. 

I watered my plants. I couldn’t sleep. I should be sleeping right now for work tomorrow but I’m too energized and nervous. 

I don’t believe in God, but Daniel saw me do the sign of the cross in the car waiting to hear back on the news for the cat. Even being an agnostic, I find comfort in believing in a higher power. 

I told him he knows I don’t believe in God but does he think God sent the kitten to us? Knowing we could help her? That’s why Đậu Đen tried ot get us to see her kittens. That’s why she left the kitten with us? ‘Cause after the antibiotics, she felt better and she knew we could help her? Did she know? Did God send her right when we were looking for pets, not having one yet, so we had extra money to care for her? 

Did believing in God make me feel less guilty about spending the money on her? I think it did. 

I donated money earlier this week to grassroots organizations that supported BLM. I hope to keep donating more money to those organizations per paycheck. 

I hope that everyone stays happy and healthy. That there’s more community resources. I hope Doce survives and we can take her home and show her to Đậu Đen and Đậu Đen can see how happy and healthy she is. I hope we can be a happy and healthy family.

I love Daniel. I love Nevi. I am going to stay up and do some craft work. I love Daniel even though he’s making me shower in fear of fleas and I hate him for that. 

I go to tomorrow with hope things turn out well. And work goes out well. And Ervin stops listening to conspiracy theories and takes care of himself. I hope BLM works out and we get changes we need. I hope I get enough rest tonight so I can work well tomorrow so I can make money for the cats and for Daniel and for my future pet dog. 

I hope for everyone’s health and happiness. 

-Vi

[zoeygreensimblr]

The Outside (Episode 25)

Today I started work experience at the Brindleton Bay vet clinic. Doctor Charlotte taught me how to work the check in program from when patients come in.

"We mostly get a lot flea sprays and neutering here but occasionally we do have serious surgical patients brought in and I do have to warn you some of them don't make it and it may be hard for you to witness that, if at any time you feel you can't handle a situation please speak up Zoey, I am a very understanding person and I will not judge you or mark you down if you feel that you need to step out for any reason" Dr Charlotte explains to me.

Dr Charlotte is in her mid 30's, perky all the time and absolutely lovely to be around

On my first day we had 3 dogs with fleas, another with swamp mouth and a cat with woozy kittyities, all of which were out within an hour. It was slow day and Dr Charlotte let me go home after lunch because she had no more patients for the day.

On Tuesday we had more flea ridden dogs, 4 neuterings, an advanced Lavanose, a sizzlepaw and critical hotfoot, it was a much more intense day, Dr Charlotte was joined by another vet name Dr Mikia, not as perky as Dr Charlotte but still very nice. The two women have funny banter through out the day like they're old friends and they make my day fun.

And then Wednesday came and my whole world came crashing down. It started out like the days before it, with Dr Charlotte explaining to me what patients she had coming in that day.

"I have a dog coming in this afternoon Zoey that has to be put down, If you feel that you need to leave early you can" She tells me

"I can stay" I promise her

"OK hun but if you change your mind at any time just let either myself or Dr Mikia know, we won't be angry" She says

Wednesday morning is slow, 4 neuterings , 2 sprays and a cat with fleas, we stopped for lunch at noon and I walked home, when I returned to the clinic there was a red haired woman, early 20's, in the waiting area.

"I'm sorry, I'll check you in" I apologise to her.

"I've already checked in thank you, they took my dog into the room, I'm just in no hurry to go in there,  the sooner I go into that room the sooner I have to say goodbye to my dog and I'm trying to pretend that's not happening" She explains

"I'm so sorry, Dr Charlotte told me you were coming in this afternoon. Can I get you anything? Would you like some water?" I ask her, her eyes are filled with such sadness and I'd give anything to take this pain away from her

"Thank you, that would be nice." She says, smiling at me sweetly, "Aunt you a little young to be a vet though?" she questions me

"I'm here on work experience, I plan to study Veterinary at Uni next year" I explain, "I'm Zoey by the way" I say, handing her a cup of water from the cooler.

"Nice to meet you Zoey, I'm Steph" She introduces herself, "My dog, Nortica has bone cancer and is in so much pain, I've been trying to avoid this but it's cruel if I let it go on any longer" She explains and my brain makes the connection of who she is, shit, this is the woman he left me for, she sweet and loves her dog...and that's when I see him, he exits the small examination room to come out into the waiting area, he walks right past me and up to her and throws his arms around her. It's like witnessing a car crashes, I want to look away but my eyes won't let me.

"Dr Charlotte says she's not going to start until you're ready" He tells her and I can see the tears rolling down her cheeks

"Just a little bit longer please" She pleads with him and he nods, he turns to walk back into the room and stops when he sees me.

"Fuck, I forgot that you were going to be here" He says to me, complete shock crossing his face like he'd been caught in the act.

"How do you know the work experience girl Angus?" Steph asks him and before he can answer I interject

"He was my personal trainer for a bit" It's not a lie, its just not the full story, he stands there staring at me, his eyes angry like I betrayed him by not admitting he was once mine.

"For a moment there I thought you were going to tell me he was your boyfriend" Steph says with a sigh of relief and I feel like a knife has stabbed me in the heart, he never told her my name or anything about me yet I knew so much about her, I was his secret that he kept from her, "Remember when we did work experience Angus" Steph asks him, ignoring the awkward tension between us.

"I didn't do work work experience Steph, I got kicked out before the exams" He reminds her and she laughs.

"Oh yeah, now I remember, you smoke a joint and got high on the football field during lunch and Mr Landgaarb kicked you out. Ruined my whole year because you couldn't even go to the formal" She recalls and he looks at me with shame in his eyes, this was the deep, dark secret he didn't want me to ever know?

"Steph, we should go in, we are keeping everyone waiting" He says as he heads back toward the examination room, Steph walks up to me and gives me a hug.

"It was nice meeting you Zoey, good luck at uni" She says before joining him.

Angus and Steph exit the examination room 45 minutes later, he has his arm around her shoulder and she's clearly very distraught, they reach the waiting area and she falls to the floor, tears streaming down her face and she's struggling to catch her breath, I walk out from behind the desk and sit with her on the floor, wrapping my arms around her.

"I'm so sorry about Nortica" I whisper to her and she looks at me and gives a little smile

"Thank you Zoey" she says. We sit like this for about 5 minutes, she has her head on my shoulder and I start stroking her hair to comfort her, I feel so much empathy for her loss and it makes me tear up too. Angus crouches down in front of us, I look him in the eye and I can see that he too has been crying, I want to comfort him, I want to wrap my arms around him but I know that's not my place anymore, it's hers and I don't want to overstep.

"Do you want me to take you home now Steph?" He asks her and she nods her head, he stands up and hold out two hands, one for each of us, it's the first time I've touched him in 3 months and it's like I feel a bolt of electric go through me when I place my hand in his, I can't look at him, it's all too much.

"Thank You Zoey" He whispers to me before he takes her hand and they walk out the door together. Dr Charlotte comes up behind me and wraps her arms around my shoulders

"You're going to make a great vet Zoey, you're very companionate and kind. I'm going to let you go home early today, it's been a hard day on you" She tells me.

I walked home, tears streaming down my face, I felt such sadness for Steph and Angus but I still felt angry and betrayed by him. When I walked into may house I could hear Tess down in the basement.

"You're home early" I greet her

"So are you. Angus wasn't there this afternoon, something to do with a dog emergency of something and Annabelle let me leave early" She explains, "Why are you home early? Have you been crying?" She asks me, giving me a hug.

"Angus was at the vets, with Steph, they had to put their dog down" I tell her

"Wow so did he make you cry? I'll punch him if he made you cry again, Ive only got 2 more days of work experience left then I can punch him for you" She says

"No, he didn't make me cry, although it was really awkward seeing him. I like Steph, she's really nice, for so long I've wanted to hate her for taking him from me but she's too nice to hate and she had him first" I explain

"I don't really know if they're together Zoey, I never see him kiss her or touch her" Tess tries to reassure me

"He held her hand in front of me today and he probably doesn't kiss her or touch her in front of you because he knows you will go off at him, he most likely hides it from you, he's good at hiding girlfriends, she knew about me when we were together but he never told her my name or any details about me and he hid the secret phone calls from me. He likes to hide things" I say with sadness in my voice.

"Have you heard from Charlie?" Tess asks, changing the subject

"No and I doubt I will either"

"He will text, I guarantee it" She says in her upbeat tone but after today I really don't care.

[carasueachterberg]

The puppies are gone. It’s just us now.

Well, us and four dogs.

And Hermoine.

And the horses.

And a few visiting cousins.

And two foster kittens.

What?

Yes, it’s true. I have finally realized my daughter’s dream and volunteered to foster two kittens for OPH’s tiny (but mighty) cat adoption program.

Superwoman Kendra has been leading this program and housing many of the cats and kittens in her home. Some of the cats have come from a local ‘cat colony’ (did you know that was a thing?). The adults she traps, has spayed/neutered and releases, but the kittens are kept to be socialized and eventually adopted.

And what better place to socialize a kitten then my crazy house?

Ian was completely on board with this. Ever since we lost his red tabby cat, Hagrid (Hermoine’s best bud) and then Crash (my best bud), he’s longed for another cat (no, we are not foster-failing, you should know by now that adopting our fosters is possibly the only thing I can say no too). I’ve put off his request worried that Hermoine might react badly to a new cat (Crash’s arrival was the day she began peeing in the basement).

Anyway, Ian agreed that yes, whenever he is home (which admittedly since it is swim season is not often), he will be socializing kittens. Plus, he seems to have a cadre of friends who are also up for the task.

Since there’s never a good time to start fostering kittens, Thanksgiving week seemed perfect. Plenty of people and stress already filling the house.

Ian and I set off early Wednesday morning to meet Kendra in Harrisburg for the exchange. Since Ian is still 40 hours short of this driving hours to get his license, it was the perfect opportunity to raise my blood pressure give him a chance to drive on Interstate 83. And what better day than the busiest traffic day of the year? (in all honesty, he did really well especially considering the mess on 83 North)

The two kittens are five-months-old, already spayed, micro-chipped, and up-to-date on shots (thanks to Chris Hunsinger at Shrewsbury Vet!). What they aren’t (yet) is happy and friendly. This is where we come in. Commence Operation Make-them-nice-kitties.

Opal is definitely not on board with these plans yet, but Phyllis is open to the idea. When we stopped off at the vet’s office for their rabies shot, Phyllis was very cooperative but nervous. Then we took Opal out to be weighed; she shot across the room and then straight up a wall. We attempted to calm her, but ultimately, the cat whisperer had to come and catch her by the scruff of her neck. She shushed her long enough to be weighed and then deposited her back in her carrier. I took note.

We’ve set the kitties up in the puppy room until the next puppies arrive. Basically, they are living in a large crate condo. We didn’t have cat toys, but we’ve improvised and hung leftover, scraggly puppy toys from the ceiling and put my puppy stool inside to create a little cave to hide inside. I’m sure their digs will get better as we figure out what they need.

So far, we’ve mostly just watched them settle in. Phyllis likes to climb the walls like a monkey and Opal mostly hunkers down in the makeshift cave and watches. I have to say they are pretty kitties.

The next few days they will be inundated with well-intentioned young adults – my kids, their friends, plus cousins from Ohio. I’m hopeful they will make progress because I have very little idea what to do next. If they were puppies I would cuddle them and ply them with treats, but I don’t think they’ll take well to cuddling and I have no treats, just kibble. Maybe I’ll buy them some tuna.

This feels very much like when we brought home our first foster dog, Galina. We have no idea what we’re doing, but we’re super excited to do it.

When these babies are ready for adoption, I’ll be sure to let you know. Meanwhile, if you’re in the market for a cat, OPH has some beauties available through petfinder here.

Oh yeah…..this blog is about the dogs!

The puppies got adopted!

Dixie goes for her spay and heartworm test this Tuesday – fingers crossed she is negative. If she is, she can go home a few days later!

Oreo still has no adopter. But we’re okay with waiting since he’s such a delight to have around. If you’d like to meet him in person, he’ll be my date for Photos with Santa and Wine Tasting at Linganore Wine Cellars on Saturday Dec 1! I’d love to share a glass of wine with you to celebrate the start of the holiday season! Bring your pup out for a classic photo!

Now, BIG FAVOR to ask. Okay, actually it’s not that big. I’ve written a short piece about one of the dogs I met on my book tour and who subsequently came to OPH and then was adopted. She is the perfect example of why I am a part of this organization.

I’ve entered the story in the My Giving Story contest (funded by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation). It could win up to 10K for OPH. But first it has to make the finals. The finalists are decided by votes. On Facebook.

So here’s what I need you to do today and every day until December 7 when voting ends….click the link below (and then save the link) and vote for Together We Rescue. You’ll be asked for your email address, but I have been assured this is only for verification purposes and then they may send you one email announcing the winners. They promise they won’t sell it or spam you – so, no risk.

I didn’t learn of this contest until the middle of the month, so we’re way behind in the voting by now and could really use your help. Thank you, thank you, thank you! And tell any other dog lovers you know. That money could help us save a lot more dogs!

Click here to vote!

Remember you can vote EVERY day until December 7!

Thanks for reading!

If you’d like to know more about my blogs and books, visit CaraWrites.com or subscribe to my monthly e-newsletter (which is rarely monthly, but I’m working at it…everybody needs a goal).

If you’d like to know more about the book, Another Good Dog: One Family and Fifty Foster Dogs, check AnotherGoodDog.org, where you can find more pictures of the dogs from the book (and some of their happily-ever-after stories), information on fostering, the schedule of signings, and what you can do right now to help shelter animals! You can also do some holiday shopping that benefits shelter dogs or get your own signed copy of the book!

If you’d like to know how you can volunteer, foster, adopt or donate with OPH, click here. And if you’d like more pictures and videos of my foster dogs past and present, be sure to join the Another Good Dog facebook group.

I love hearing from readers, so please feel free to comment here on the blog, email carasueachterberg@gmail.com or connect with me on Facebook, twitter, or Instagram.

 Best,

 Cara

Released August 2018 from Pegasus Books and available now

Oh yes, it's happened.... #fosterkittens #letthenonsensebegin @operationpawsforhomes The puppies are gone. It’s just us now. Well, us and four dogs. And Hermoine. And the horses.