#the twist *shooketh* | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

marril96 · 3 months ago

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WHAT?

WHAT??

WHAT???

Everybody Wants to Rule the World || Chapter 4 || Vernon

Agatha x Rio || TW: Smut and violence

Fic Masterpost || Please leave a comment on ao3

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Agatha surveyed her surroundings as she drove into Vermont. Everything was frozen, but beautiful all the same. Webs of small branches were encased in ice. Their trunks were stained with snow. The sky was matted with grey clouds that cast a mask of gloom over the town.

The town was charming, filled with spread out neighborhoods of wood paneled houses. As she drove past a white church with a slanted roof and square tower, she looked across the water to see a looming structure. It was a dark grey cube topped with light grey. Something about the cold structure was out of place in what was in the otherwise warm town. Her phone’s harsh ringtone shocked her out of her trance.

“Harkness,” she said.

“You know, you don’t need to pick up like that on your personal phone.”

“Wanda… Sorry, I got them mixed up. How’s it going?”

“Pretty well… I know it’s short notice, but can you come over tonight?”

“I…” Agatha sighed, “I don’t know. I’m all the way in Vermont…”

“Nope, not taking no for an answer.”

“What?!“

“We haven’t hung out in person for over a month. You’re coming over for dinner.”

“We can hang out this weekend with the boys,” Agatha said, turning onto a bridge.

“It has to be tonight,” Wanda said.

“Why? What is so important about tonight?”

“I want you to meet Nat.”

“O-oh! Natasha? You never introduce anyone. So, things are getting serious with you two,” Agatha said, a small smile tugging at her lips.

“Stooop. I just… it’s been four months and I thought she should meet my best friend.”

“Has she met the boys?”

“No! Not yet. Thats at least a few months away. Buuut, I want to get your take on her.”

“My… take? Are you sure?” Agatha asked.

“You may be tactless sometimes..”

“Thanks.”

“… But you’re always honest with me. I need that. I get-“

“You give people way too much benefit of the doubt,” Agatha stated.

“Excuse me, I like to think I see the best in people.”

“Even when it’s barely there.”

“Agatha.”

“Fine. I’ll be there at seven.”

“Thank you. I think you two will get along well.”

“Eh, last time you said that, the girl tried saging me the moment I walked through the door.”

“Well, Nat doesn’t have an affinity for crystals or spiritualism. You should be safe from Palo Santo for now.”

“Silver lining,” she said dryly, “I gotta go, but I’ll see you tonight.”

“Alright, don’t be late!”

Agatha smirked as she hung up, happy that Wanda finally found someone who stuck around for longer than two months. She always seemed to find people who never deserved her.

She pulled up to a line of caution tape well outside of the bounds of the grey building. It was the last vestiges of the former Yankee Nuclear Power Station that had been closed years back. She stepped out of her car and was met by Officer Claudia Hawley. She was a short Irish woman with pale, freckled skin and murky red curls peeking out from her tightly wound bun.

“Agent Harkness. Thank you for making the trip here.”

“No problem. Glad to help.”

“A few things to go over. You will need to limit your time onsite and wear protective gear.”

“Sorry, what now?” Agatha asked, her brows shooting up.

“The plant was decommissioned, but the soil and area is still contaminated. The rest of the plant has been demolished, but the only part left standing is the reactor building.”

“Why was it closed?” Agatha asked a bit warily, “Did something happen?”

“I mean, there were a few incidents where radioactive material was found in the groundwater. Parts of it failed at certain points as well, but it never fully melted down.”

“No wonder they pulled the plug.”

“Oh, that’s not why they closed it,“ Claudia said with an air of disdain, “The plant wasn’t making enough money.”

“That tracks. Gotta love capitalism at work. So, what do I need to wear?” Agatha asked.

“A protective suit, boots, and a mask,” she said, “Your partner got here about thirty minutes ago and is already putting hers in at the tent.”

“My what?”

A tall, striking black woman with intensely judgmental eyes walked over. Well, they were typically only judgmental towards Agatha. Her lips were pursed as she looked her up and down. Jenn shook her head.

“Nope, not happening,” Jenn said, turning to leave.

“I’m not happy about it either, but here we are,” Agatha said.

Agatha pulled her phone out, making sure it was her work phone. She called Lilia who answered immediately.

“I know what you’re going to say, Agatha. We’re not doing this.”

“Why her? Out of every agent, you have to pick the most stuck up-“

“I’m, like, ten feet away. I can clearly hear you,” Jen said.

“Agatha. I know you two can’t stand each other, but you are my two best. Like it or not, you make a good team. Do your job.”

“Lili-“ Agatha began before her phone returned to her lock screen, “What the hell, she hung up on me.”

“I guess we need to get through this,” Jenn said, “There’s no use bargaining with that woman once she’s put you in a time-out.”

“What did you do to earn yours?” Agatha asked.

“I called out another agent when he made a wrong move,” Jenn said, pulling her thin, white protective suit up, “I also… may have made a snide comment about him during a briefing in front of the team.”

“That’s not a huge deal,” Agatha said as she took her own suit and kicked off her shoes.

“I know. It didn’t help that his daddy was a higher up, though,” she said with a roll of her eyes.

“Not Jenkins…”

“Yep. Little worm. Why were you put in time out? Did you tackle another unsub?” Jenn asked dryly while sliding her arms into the sleeves.

“I maintain that guy already broke his collarbone when he jumped the fence,” she said, looking away with a smirk, “No, I didn’t rough anyone up this time.”

“Bribery?”

“I wouldn’t be that messy.”

“Got it. You may be dirty, but never messy. Tampering with evidence?”

“They’ve never been able to make any of those accusations stick,” Agatha pointed out while zipping the front of her suit up.

“How the hell are you still an agent?”

“Because I get results… and I’m careful not to expose how I get them.”

“You haven’t told me. What did you do to piss Lilia off this time?” Jenn asked.

“You know that case in Englewood about five months back?” she asked, grunting as she yanked the black, heavy boots on.

“The one with that guy beaten to death in the garden?” Jenn asked while pulling her gloves on.

“Yeah. Aaron James. I - allegedly - threatened the local authorities when they gave me the runaround about his background. I also may have ignored Lilia’s order to not look further into the guy and dug up some privileged information using some outside help… again, allegedly.”

“What did you find?” Jenn asked.

Agatha arched a brow at her.

“Oh, come on. I know we’re not best friends or anything, but you know you can count on me to be discreet,” Jenn said.

“Let’s get through today. Maybe I’ll tell you later if there’s a connection.”

“I’ve looked over the case files. I know about the connection to the other murders. I’m not looking to take you down professionally.”

“Only emotionally.”

“Well, yes. But when it comes to our work, I know things can be a bit more grey. It may not be my way of working, but at least the rules you break are the ones that need to be broken for some cases. I can respect that enough to look the other way as long as it’s more helpful than harmful.”

Agatha pursed her lips, her brow furrowing as she considered her options. Jenn may have been a a rival of sorts, but it was undeniable that she was extremely intelligent and capable. She was the only agent apart from Lilia who could spar with her on equal footing.

“Fine. I found out that Aaron wasn’t exactly a saint.”

“How so?” Jenn asked, crossing her arms.

“He had three stalking charges on his record. One was a classmate in high school. She filed a restraining order before dropping out to be homeschooled.”

“Geez, poor girl…”

“They managed to seal that one since he was a minor. The second was his roommate’s girlfriend. He terrorized her for the whole of college, but the school talked her out of reporting it a number of times. A few years after graduating, he began ‘bumping into’ her nearly every day. She caught him idling in his car outside of her apartment building. She filed a restraining order that didn’t do much. When he violated it, his mother - she is a shark of a lawyer - got him off. He kept following her for another two years before she moved to another state.”

“And the third?”

“Ended up in the hospital. They briefly dated for five months in his early thirties. When she broke up with him, he harassed her at work, home, and anywhere she went.”

“For how long?” Jenn asked.

“Six years,” Agatha replied.

“Fuck…”

“She moved from city to city, but he always caught up to her. The police didn’t take her seriously and just told her to keep track of what he did. One morning, she went on an early run and was pulled into an alleyway where he beat her within an inch of her life. From the pictures I saw, it wouldn’t be surprising if he thought he had killed her when he left.”

“And how the hell did he get away with that one?” Jenn asked.

“That last city was the one his father served in as a cop.”

“Of course.”

“That in addition with his mother’s help… it didn’t even go to trial. I wouldn’t be surprised if his victim was intimidated out of pressing charges.”

“Then what?”

“He was dead a month later with tulips shoved down his throat,” Agatha said.

“I mean… I sort of want to find this killer just to buy them dinner or at least a coffee. Is that awful?”

“No. I feel the same way. So far, all of his victims have been terrible men,” Agatha said as the two of them trudged up the hill towards the grey cube that stood in the distance, “It makes me wonder if we’re dealing with a killer who has a moral code of their own. Or someone who’s been abused by men in the past.”

“Lilia didn’t tell you much about the crime scene, did she?” Jenn asked as they pulled their masks over their noses and mouths.

“What do you mean?” Agatha asked.

She opened the door to the reactor control room. It was painted a mint green and filled with grey desks that curved into the center of the room. Along the walls were control panels that bent into an “L” shape halfway down. The bottom half of the panels were resting atop cabinets almost like a slanted kitchen counter that bordered the entire room.

Each panel held switches and dials. On the walls were small circular dials that looked almost like compasses. The red needles within rested on zero. What was once a hub of vital decision making and monitoring was now a rotting relic.

Agatha’s eyes scanned the space before seeing the body bound to a steel chair. The head was slumped forward and the wrists were raw from fighting against restraints.

“She’s a woman.”

Agatha walked closer to the body. The woman was in her late fifties. She was blonde with a once pale face having now turned a slight shade of grey. There were empty plastic gallon containers for water strewn about. Her lips were blue and her face looked swollen. Based on the bucket nearby, it was clear she had gotten sick multiple times while going through whatever preceded her death.

“What the hell did he do to her?” Jenn muttered.

“We don’t know it’s a he,” Agatha corrected in a distracted mumble, her eyes not leaving the haunting scene before them.

“Fair,” Jenn said, “I mean… the flowers are a good tell.”

“And the thought put into each kill.”

“Male killers can also be fastidious planners.”

“I guess, but there is a reason women get away with murder more than men. There is some serious emotional control up until the moment of the killing,” Agatha said, “Like they wait until the actual kill to release every bit of emotion before going cold again.”

Jenn looked over at her, her head tilting slightly. She could feel Jenn dissecting her. Agatha shrugged and rubbed the back of her neck.

“I don’t know. Just a theory,” she said.

“Sure…”

“So… do we know how she died?” Agatha asked as she stepped closer to the bound corpse, noticing the ragged marks around the rope tying her wrists and ankles.

“There’s no blood. No weapon.”

“Just water,” Agatha said, kneeling down to look at one of the unlabeled water jugs.

“Oh shit…” Jenn whispered.

“What?”

Jenn waved her over and pointed at one of the plastic jugs that had a word scrawled in dark blue Sharpie.

“Mason. The town.” Jenn said.

“Why does that sound familiar-“

“Agatha,” Jenn chided, “That town’s been on the news for a year.”

“I watch Netflix, not the news.”

“Really?” Jenn asked sardonically.

“Oh, like you don’t tune out after a day on the job.”

“Fine, whatever. As I was saying, they’ve been on the news because of a water crisis.”

“There was a lawsuit, right?” Agatha asked as her mind combed through vague snippets of overheard small talk.

“More than just one. This company had been polluting their drinking water for years without anyone knowing until it got seriously dangerous.”

“Did people die?”

“Twelve and counting. There’s also no telling if others in the area will end up with cancer down the line.”

“What was the company?”

“Meridian Pharmaceuticals. According to the officers who came on the scene earlier, this is Vivian Brook. The CEO of Meridian.”

“Someone is definitely making a statement here,” Agatha said.

“Laura, how was she killed?” Jenn asked the medical examiner.

The twenty something woman stood up from her crouched stance while looking at the corpse’s extremities.

“Dry drowning,” Laura said, her eyes moving over the woman’s bloated, discolored face.

“Drowning? As in, force fed water?” Jenn asked.

“Yep. I’ve never seen a case up close before,” the young woman said, bending down to look closer at the dead woman’s visage, “It really is fascinating.”

Jenn cringed slightly at Laura’s blatant curiosity before looking back at the woman.

“How long would it take to do that?” Agatha asked.

“From hours to days. Most likely hours with the quality of the water. It dilutes the blood and can confusion and central nerve dysfunction in the early stages.”

“And the later stages?” Jenn asked.

“Seizures, brain damage, and death. It’s incredibly rare for it to happen by accident, but I’ve never heard of it being used to kill someone else.”

“How would someone even do that?” Jenn asked, “I mean, logistically?”

Agatha looked down at the chair the woman was slumped over in. Her skin was cut from twine.

“They tied her down. Emptied jug after jug of water down her throat. Probably held her back by the hair,” Agatha said.

“I think I found the culprit,” Laura said, using her pen to lift a circular plastic ring, “She used this to hold her mouth open.”

“Is that the things dentists use?” Jenn asked.

“It probably made it much easier for the killer to make her drink. I’ll let you ladies know when I figure out anything new. This body has a lot more to tell,” Laura said, a little too happily.

“What about the flowers?” Agatha asked.

“Sorry?” Laura asked.

“There were flowers at every other scene for this killer,” Jenn answered, “Usually embedded somewhere in the body. Like.. in the wounds sometimes.”

“Well, there aren’t any wounds to put any in.”

“Check her mouth,” Agatha said.

Laura used a gloved hand to open her mouth. Jenn looked away. Though she was a seasoned agent, she avoided looking at gore when she was able to. Agatha had no such qualms, looking just as closely as Laura did as the tweezers dipped into Vivian Brook’s mouth. Laura narrowed her eyes at what she found. She pinched it and pulled it up, revealing a slightly crushed sphere of tiny white flowers. Jenn had looked back, seeing the plant.

“Water hemlock,” she said.

“What?” Agatha asked.

“Water hemlock. It’s a poisonous water flower.”

“How did you know that off the top of your head?” Agatha asked.

“I like botany, okay?” Jenn mumbled.

Agatha stood up, thinking to herself.

“Let’s go,” she said.

Jenn followed her out, grateful to get out of the radioactive area. Once they reached a safe distance, they stripped out of their hazmat suits.

Agatha smirked and said, “Maybe you do serve a purpose for this case.”

“Thanks a lot,” Jenn said with a roll of her eyes.

“No, I’m serious.”

“Thank… you?” Jenn said, tilting her head.

“I didn’t even consider the meanings of the flowers chosen for each murder.”

“Well, I can look at the other flowers to see if there are more connections,” Jenn said, “Maybe there are other aspects to the flowers that the unsub used to make their message.”

“They definitely have a lot to say.”

—————————————————————

Agatha pulled up to Wanda’s house later that night. She took the bottle of wine she picked up on the way down from Vermont and carried it with her. She walked across the lawn, forgoing the stone path from the driveway entirely. She knocked at the door, jumping as it was instantly opened by Wanda. Her delicate features were at a sort of ease that Agatha hasn’t seen in years. She smiled as her friend threw her arms around her in a tight hug.

“Geez, you’re acting like you haven’t seen me in years.”

“That’s what it feels like. We can’t go that long again. I missed you.”

“I missed you too,” Agatha said.

She looked over at a gorgeous woman walking out of the kitchen. Her red hair matched Wanda’s, though she looked different in every other respect. Her features were more prominent. Her eyes were bigger, her lips fuller. Agatha had to remind herself that this woman was already taken by Wanda. She reached out, taking her hand and shaking it.

“Agatha.”

“Natasha. Wanda has told me so much about you.”

“Uh oh. How much?” Agatha asked.

“She wouldn’t shut up about you. It had me worried, to be honest,” Natasha said with a playful smirk.

“No need. We already got that out of our systems in college,” Agatha said.

“Oh?” Natasha said with raised eyebrows, looking at Wanda.

Agatha felt the tension tighten the air as Wanda’s eyes widened. Natasha looked back at Agatha.

“She didn’t tell me that.”

“There’s really not much to tell,” Agatha said, desperately trying to salvage the relaxed mood from before, “We dated for a handful of months before realizing we were better off as friends.”

A few beats passed before the other woman arched a brow.

“The lesbian dating to friend pipeline,” Natasha said with a smile, eliciting a sigh of relief from Wanda and Agatha.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mention it before. It’s so far in the past for us,” Wanda said.

“It’s alright. We all have friends that started out as something else.”

“Right… wait, we do?” Wanda asked as if she didn’t just admit to the very same thing.

Natasha’s hand rested on Wanda’s.

“I’ll tell you all about them later,” she said.

“Them as in nonbinary or them as in multiple exes who you’re friends with?” Wanda asked.

“I mean, you can’t say much about it now,” Agatha said, earning a dirty look from Wanda.

Dinner passed without further incident. Natasha told Agatha about her work at a defense contractor while Agatha chatted about the FBI. The two of them seemed to have more in common than Agatha had expected. Perhaps Wanda had a type.

She watched how easy Wanda breathed around Natasha, how comfortable they seemed with one another. The other woman always had a comforting touch whenever Wanda seemed to tense or worry herself. She seemed to be perfectly matched with the sweet mess of nerves that was Wanda Maximoff.

Once the night wound down, Agatha could feel her eyelids growing heavy from the long day behind her.

“Thank you so much for dinner,” she said, hugging her friend.

She turned to Natasha, saying, “It was wonderful to meet you.”

“Likewise. Wanda was right about you. You’re a fascinating person.”

“I’ll walk you out to your car,” Wanda said.

Once they reached her car, Agatha turned to her.

“Okay, I like her.”

Wanda lit up, happier than anything that her best friend and girlfriend got along. Given how rightfully harsh Agatha had been on her exes, she was relieved to have someone who successfully earned her approval. She hugged her again before wishing her good luck on her own date.

————————————————————

Agatha groaned as she tossed her way through her closet. It had been far too long since she had been out with someone and she wasn’t sure what she owned that would actually fit the occasion.

She pulled on a dark green dress that hugged her figure. It was something she wouldn’t normally feel comfortable in. She was so used to throwing on jeans and a top that anything fancier than that felt foreign to her. She checked herself in the mirror, sighing as she felt doubt creeping in.

“That looks beautiful!” Wanda yelled from the propped up phone.

“Are you sure?” Agatha asked, looking back at her through FaceTime.

“Positive. You look gorgeous in that.”

“Okay. Okay, I’ll wear this one.”

She did her makeup, keeping it understated save for a bold red lip. Her brown, wavy hair fell down her back, sweeping against the small of it. A wolf whistle came from her phone. She let out a snort while laughing at Wanda. Her bell rang and she looked like a startled cat.

“Hey, you are going to be fine. She already likes you. Just have fun,” Wanda said.

“I’ll try.”

—————————————————————

Agatha opened her door to find Alison wearing slacks and a dinner jacket with a silk top underneath. Agatha forgot how to breathe at the sight of a beautiful woman in a suit. She shook her head a moment before saying, “Hi… you look…”

“Thanks,” Alison said with a laugh, “You look… too.”

“Um.. so, where are we going?”

“This new place in Agawam. Vincetti’s. I haven’t been, but it’s supposed to be great.”

“I’m always up for Italian,” Agatha said.

“We’ve definitely earned the carbs from all of the gym time we’ve been putting in.”

“Definitely,” she said, “Lead the way.”

—————————————————————

The anxiety she had from before seemed to melt away beneath the dim light of the restaurant. The two of them talked and joked the way they did at the gym, effortlessly picking up their dynamic again. The wine loosened her up enough to relax, even when Alison showed her glimpses of physical affection. A touch to her arm, holding her hand gently atop the table, leaning over to brush a lock of hair out of her face.

“So, any top secret FBI business you can divulge?” Alison asked with a playful air.

“To the enemy? Nothing.”

“Oh, come on!”

“I would rather not have a group of protesters at my next crime scene, no matter how cute the protester is.”

“I would never!” Alison said before correcting herself, “I would never do that to you. Come onnn. I know there’s something interesting going on if you’ve been skipping your workouts this week.”

“You don’t want to know the grisly details, even if I could talk about them.”

“Are you kidding? I live for morbid details. I bet it’s a serial killer. Am I right? I bet I’m right,” she said.

Agatha hesitated, clearly giving away that Alison had guessed correctly.

“I really can’t. All I can say is that it’s one of the most interesting cases I’ve worked in a while.”

“Okay, you can’t tease me like that without delivering,” she said, her eyes darkening.

Agatha felt a soft blush burning her cheeks. She took a sip of her wine before speaking.

“It’s a very intelligent and impressive criminal. I can’t go more into depth than that.”

“Oooh. Sounds like I have competition by the way you talk about her,” she said.

Agatha’s smile disappeared at the statement. A more manufactured one took its place.

“I never said they were a she.”

“I mean, intelligence with the ability to get away with stuff seems more feminine than not,” Alison said with a shrug, “Sorry. I’m a bit of a true crime junkie and I forget to be tactful about it with people who work in it.”

“It’s okay. And we don’t know the killer’s gender yet,” Agatha said.

“So it IS a serial killer.”

“Shit.”

—————————————————————

Once they were at Agatha’s place, she sat in Alison’s car. They were talking, Alison’s hand on her knee. Alison was cracking up at a story Agatha told about making a TA cry.

“That’s so awful!” Alison laughed.

“He deserved it! He was up his own ass and barely understood the material in that class. I’m sure he healed from being chewed out. He’s a big boy.”

“Well, I bet he never messed with a student after that,” she said.

“He was definitely less condescending to the women there after that.”

“I guess it’s not surprising that you’ve always been a badass,” Alison said.

“That’s one word for it. Other people have been a lot less flattering with how they describe me.”

“Other people are weak. They get intimidated easily.”

Agatha looked at the other woman, her eyes resting on her lips. Alison stopped speaking as a loaded silence fell between them. The question of who would move first hung in the air.

Before she could overthink it, Agatha dove in first to capture her lips. She combed her fingers through Alison’s dark hair as the other woman hummed into the kiss. She pulled it gently as it deepened, coaxing a moan from Alison.

As their kiss grew more frantic, Alison suddenly ended up straddling Agatha in the passenger’s seat. Agatha reached up, undoing her jacket and sliding her hand down her chest.

“I normally have a rule…” Agatha breathed, “To not invite anyone inside on the first date.”

“Good thing we’re not inside, then,” Alison whispered back, kissing her again.

Agatha smiled as she pulled Alison’s shirt from her pants, skimming her fingers over her bare skin beneath the fabric. Alison reached down, sliding a hand up her inner thigh, the dress gathered up around her hips.

Fumbling hands undid Alison’s pants followed by Agatha’s hand sliding inside. Alison let out a moan as she felt her fingers grinding over her. Her own hand reached the apex of Agatha’s thighs, pushing her panties to the side and pushing two fingers into her. Agatha gasped sharply, her back arching.

The two of them moved in tandem, their breathing filling the silence. Agatha looked up into her eyes as she felt pleasure winding itself into a coil within her. Alison bit her lip to silence herself as she shuddered. The sight of her in that moment pushed Agatha over the edge. She squeezed her eyes shut as that coil snapped within her, sending her into a spiral of ecstasy.

The two of them caught their breath, panting and letting out soft, broken laughs at their own messy state. Alison gazed down at her before leaning down, kissing her once more before moving back into the driver’s seat. The two panted, smiling goofily at each other.

“So… did I earn a second date?” Alison asked.

—————————————————————

Agatha felt like she was floating for the next few days. Alison and she texted like a couple of teenagers. It seemed that whenever she had a chance, she was sending something to her.

She finally returned to the gym that Monday, bringing a glow with her that had stuck with her since their date. She looked around the largely empty place for her before getting a text.

Ali: Meet me in the sauna 😈

A smile broke out across her lips. She rushed to the locker room, changing into a towel in record time. Walking into the narrow hallway, she found an abandoned towel mere steps from the sauna. She looked up at the window on the door and felt her heart stop.

There was a crimson stain smeared across the glass.

She held her breath as she opened the door. Steam poured out, revealing the sight of Alison covered in blood. Her eyes were open and lifeless. Red handprints and streaks painted the sauna. The blood streamed down with the precipitation caused by the humidity. Her body was riddled with stab wounds.

In her hands was a rose, the thorns biting into her palms. Agatha stumbled back, slipping on the wet floor. She hit the floor, the impact radiating through her. She let out a scream as the horror of it all set in.

Her screen lit up with one last text.

“Alice left for Wonderland.”

#i am shooketh #this was so good #damn girl you're queen of twists

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lilianne-tarot · 1 month ago

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PICK A CARD: Your Next Cutest Moment With Your Crush ⋆.𐙚 ̊

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　˚　.　　　　　 . ✦

How to Pick Your Pile: Take a deep breath, clear your mind, and look at the images above. Which one pulls you in the most? Trust your gut! Once you choose the image, The number below your chosen image is your pile. If more than one catches your eye, that just means there’s extra tea for you—go ahead and read both!

If you enjoyed this reading, get your own personalized paid reading here!

For personalized 18+ readings, click here!

My KO-FI link: HERE🫶🏻

MY MASTERLIST 🫶🏻

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　˚　.　　　　　 . ✦

˙⋆✮PILE I

Cards pulled: 8 of swords, 4 of wands, the moon, 8 of cups, 10 of wands

DAMN PILE 1. First of all, let me say this: you are not expecting this moment to be as soft and emotionally charged as it’s gonna be. Like, this gives "oops I didn’t know you cared like that" energy. Baby, we’re starting with confusion, and overthinking from your side. You think you're stuck in the friend zone or on the outside of their world, but honey, you have no clue what’s simmering under the surface.

So, picture this: It’s a casual hangout—maybe a small get-together, birthday, or group thing (4 of Wands is like the party card, but lowkey, cozy vibes). There’s laughter, chatter, but you? You’re kind of in your head, unsure of where you stand. And that's when they notice. Oh yes. They clock that you’re feeling distant. And guess what? They do something about it. This moment becomes special because your crush sees you — like, really notices you. The 10 of Wands is screaming that they are carrying a lot too — probs crushing hard but holding it in because they think you wouldn’t be into them like that (plot twist: wrong). So here you both are, lowkey struggling under all these feelings you think the other one doesn’t have — until bam, the vibe shifts.

BABY. They are shooketh. Like, this person has been holding back so much again, 10 of Wands. They are Carrying all these feelings and not telling anyone (Relatable content). And in this moment, seeing you? It hits different. Their feelings are rising to the surface, even if they don’t confess right away. You’ll probably catch their eyes lingering a little too long, voice softer, body turned toward you like you’re the only person in the room. After? They’ll be thinking about this moment on repeat. Like, analyzing everything you said, everything. You’ll live rent-free in their mind, okay?

If we talk about how they’ll feel after that, then, Honestly? Shook but in a good way. Like, "Hold up, are we having a moment right now?" maybe pretending to be chill but internally screaming because finally, there’s proof that this connection is not one-sided. And here’s the kicker: You’ll feel lighter because finally, someone sees you beyond what you present to the world. To give you a hint, Maybe someone even mentions the moon? Also, I’m hearing soft, nostalgic songs — think "Until I Found You" by Stephen Sanchez or something giving "you’re my secret crush I didn’t know how to say it" vibes.

Okay babe, listen up: Don’t run from this moment. When they open up to you or give you that look, you know the look, lean into it. You don’t have to give in everything, but give them something back. Smile a little longer. Touch their arm when you respond, . Say something real like, "I didn’t think you noticed, but I’m glad you do." (i sound like a relationship coach right now😭) if you do this, BOOM door opened for more.An advice is, stop overthinking your worth in their eyes (I say this lovingly). You are so much more seen and adored than you realize. The moment will be so much better if you allow yourself to believe that.

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˙⋆✮PILE II

Cards Pulled: the world reversed, the star, 8 of pentacles, 7 of swords reversed, the devil

Ooooh okay, babe, pile 2 — let me just say, the energy coming off this spread is intense but kinda sexy, like that moment in a movie when two people accidentally brush hands, but you know it's not that accidental. So let’s dive in because this is tea you need to hear.

So first of all—The World reversed sitting next to The Star? BABY, this cute moment is about to hit you like unfinished business meets healing energy. I’m seeing a vibe where either you and your crush haven’t really gotten to that “real talk” moment yet OR there’s some tension under the surface — like, y’all are low-key circling each other but haven’t admitted that this connection is a little too charged to be just casual. And then bam, the moment happens. 8 of Pentacles is giving me “mundane but magical,” so imagine, you're both focused on something else, but in the middle of all that, something shifts. Maybe you’re working on a project, helping a friend, or just caught in conversation when suddenly, it gets weirdly deep. Like… you drop a vulnerable comment without realizing, and they catch it. 7 of Swords reversed says the mask slips — for both of you.

Now here is when The Devil enters the chat. And listen, when I say chemistry off the charts, I mean red flag, green flag, I-don’t-even-care-I-wanna-touch-you kind of tension. It’s giving lingering glances, leaning in a little too close, breath hitching in your throat kinda moment. Like, someone says something stupidly flirty (maybe joking to cover it up😶‍🌫️), but you both freeze because why does it feel like you're standing too close in a crowded room? What makes this moment special, though, is that mix of vulnerability and raw attraction. The Star softens The Devil’s intense vibe—so instead of this being some flirty joke you move past, it's gonna feel like "I see you for real" energy. And The World reversed says this is a long time coming. Y’all have been dancing around this for a hot minute, and finally, the tension snaps—but in a cute, sweet way that makes your heart flutter and leaves you questioning if that just happened.

Now here’s the fun part: how they feel during and after? Okay, babe, they're SHOOK. Like full-on rethinking their life choices shook. They didn’t mean to be that obvious, but 7 of Swords reversed says they can't hide it anymore—your vibe gets under their skin in a way they can't explain. And after? Obsessing. Low-key watching your socials, replaying what was said in their head, wondering if you picked up on their feelings. Meanwhile, you're out here also spiraling in the cutest way, like “Did they mean that touch? Was I imagining it? Why did I blush so hard?” Symbolic signs? Omg, Devil + Star combo tells me music is important. Either a song plays right as this moment happens, or you’ll hear a song that reminds you of that exact vibe afterward—like those songs that make you feel like you're the main character having a slow-burn love story. And also, I’m seeing mirrors or reflections—maybe you catch them staring at you through a window, or you glance at each other in a reflection and realize the eye contact is a little too intense.

Just be in the moment. If you wanna drop a little "Hmm, interesting..." smirk, do it. If you wanna linger a little longer in the conversation, do it. You’re safe to explore this tension. There might be aa shift in your dynamic where y’all go from casual/crushing to "oh, we’re really a thing, huh?" Even if it’s unspoken at first, trust me, you’ll both walk away from this moment knowing something changed.

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˙⋆✮ PILE III

Cards pulled: 9 of pentacles, 8 of wands, 3 of pentacles, 2 of pentacles, 6 of cups

Omg! my dear PILE 3 when I say your next cute moment with your crush is giving rom-com in real life, I’m not exaggerating. The way these cards are laid out, I swear it’s like watching the scene of a movie where the tension builds, something adorable (and chaotic) happens, and suddenly, you’re both realizing there’s something more here. And yes—so many pentacles—like HELLO? Stability, vibes.

So first off, HONEY, this isn't just a fleeting, "oops we bumped into each other at the coffee shop" type of moment. No no. With the 9 of Pentacles, 3 of Pentacles, and 2 of Pentacles, this moment is happening in a space where you're both comfortable but lowkey performing for each other, like a mutual friends’ gathering, a casual group project meet, or some type of shared task/event where you both gotta show up and work together. BUT—here’s the tea—the moment you two are in the same space, it's like everything starts moving fast, because of the 8 of Wands energy, and suddenly you're both matching each other’s energy, bantering, and doing the most to lowkey impress each other, while pretending you're totally chill.

it’s going to feel sweet and natural. Maybe you’ll bring up an inside joke from the past, or one of you will recall a cute memory you shared before—something that softens the whole moment and makes you both realize how comfortable you are together. Like imagine you’re laughing over some dumb joke only the two of you get, and suddenly there’s that pause—that eye contact where you’re both like, “Wait, why is my heart doing this?” Also, side note—there’s this energy of playful competition here, like maybe you're teasing each other, or working on something and "accidentally" brushing hands, you know? Very romantic tension building under casual vibes.

2 of Swords popping out from the deck when i was done pulling out the cards, tells me they’re gonna be a mess internally, but trying SO HARD to keep cool. Like, on the outside, they’ll be laughing and vibing, but on the inside? Full on omg why do I suddenly feel so into them? panic mode. And here’s where 8 of Wands comes in—this moment will hit them fast and hard, like they didn’t expect to feel this level of attraction or connection, and suddenly it’s just there. You’ll feel on top of the world, like "damn, I was cute today" energy. You'll notice them noticing you—like, actually noticing—and it’ll give you such a boost. But also, there will be a part of you that’s like, "Hmm, should I play this cool? Or should I risk showing I’m into them too?"—2 of Pentacles struggle—balancing that playful energy with your real feelings.

I see someone saying something about “balance” or “juggling” or even a song playing in the background that's all about realizing feelings for someone you’ve known for a while—think "You Belong With Me" vibes but less dramatic. Also, food might weirdly pop into this moment? Like casually offering each other snacks or talking about food. Idk why, but I’m seeing it.

This moment is a stepping stone—like, after this, your dynamic is gonna shift. Your crush won’t be able to unsee the way they felt around you. Expect them to be a lil' awkward in the days after, like trying to “figure out” why they suddenly feel so drawn to you. And babe, let them stew in it a bit—you’ve got the power here.

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Thank you so much for reading all the way through! I hope my reading resonated with you and that you had a lovely time going through it. If you enjoyed it, please like and reblog—it really means a lot! Let me know which pile you chose; I absolutely love hearing your thoughts and feedback on my readings! ♡

Note: tarot cards provide guidance and possible insights into what could happen based on current energies, thoughts, and actions. the cards can highlight potential paths or outcomes, but they do not predict the future in a fixed way. this is a general reading so take what resonates!

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absolutebl · 10 months ago

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10 BLs That Shook Me

@trribledelight asked for "BLs that made you think or learn smthg or shook you culturally? Eg the political considerations in Not Me..."

Let's get the rough ones out of the way first, shall we?

1 2gether

Green. One of the most egregious reps for punching down humor against femmes in BL (and there sure are a lot out there). Seriously GMMTV? Must you?

At the time we all watched this because there wasn't anything else to watch, and it's been a long time since I bothered with a rewatch, but Green is one of the reasons I just can't with this series.

I'm not knocking the actor, but the character and how the other characters behave around him, and the director with regard to this aspect of the plot and portrayal was rough going.

What shook me was how casually homophobic 2g was. It was just so odd to watch a gay romance gloss over and degrade queerness. I was like, wait, aren't they supposed to me on our side?

(Ah, the before times.)

2 Fish Upon the Sky

Shall we address the head wrap in the room? This BL has some of the most shockingly racist content I've seen in a long time. Also punching down humor. I fast forwarded through it and I still don't want to think about it. GMMTV should be throughly ashamed of themselves... Again. I was shook, but in a bad way.

Okay, now for the ones that shook me in a good way.

3 Until We Meet Again

I watched this early in my Thai BL journey (while it was airing) and I had no idea what to expect. Frankly, you could watch it now and still not know. It's just very unusual for a Thai BL.

The plot twist about how they each ended up reborn. Just so brilliant. I still can't get over it. So simple. SO CLEVER. So punishing for the families.

Fantastic!

4 Secret Crush On You

This one kinda shook me all along but that Daisy & Touch scene. It lives on in my head rent free forever. Just because it was so beautifully sweet and genuine and kindly towards a femme character.

I still don't like this BL.

But I love that scene in it.

5 My Beautiful Man

I went on a JOURNEY with this show. Mostly because I didn't think Japan had it in them to land something this complex. But they managed it beautifully by not shying away from the delicious messy ugliness of it all.

Possibly the greatest final episode in all BL.

And from Japan. Usually so bad at endings.

I remain gobsmacked.

6 Unknown

I shouldn't have been shooketh by this one but I really was.

The style of it while staying so down home and gritty.

How old school Chinese BL it felt yet it still managed to be very modern BL about it.

The execution and quality of the acting.

How it was aired (available in YouTube?! we NEVER get that from Taiwan!)

Also the pair branding. We haven't gotten this level of pair brand from the leads in a Taiwanese BL since SamYu.

I'm was absolutely riveted by everything about this show and its production.

I loved seeing it. I hope we get more BLs like this from Taiwan as a result.

But I ALSO hope they realize that a big factor in the popularity and the success of this show was in distribution.

It's what's for dinner.

Along with the stepbrother trope.

KOREA'S SUPRISES

I watch a lot of Kdramas as well as BL, and have done for a really long time. I'm riveted by Hallyu, from an entertainment industry perspective (what I wouldn't do to get my hands on some of their proprietary data). I also listen to a ton of Kpop.

Therefore, Korea dominates the P'ABL gets shooketh list because I had (and have) more expectations firmly in place around Korea's media product sfyle than anyone elses. Even before they started to make a big play into the BL scene.

My favorite BLs from Korea, like Semantic Error and Light on Me are EXACTLY what I expect from them, manufactured perfection. But I was also shook more times by Korea than other BL nations because I had such rigid expectations.

7 Color Rush

Yeah yeah. But it starred an idol. It started out pretty and stiff and everything I was expecting and then the concept hit me up side the head and I never recovered from the CLEVER of this show. I'm not used to my Kdramas or my BL being this high concept and SMART about their sanitized perfection.

8 Blueming

What with the 8th Sense and others since, Blueming seems to have been somewhat forgotten about. But at the time, I was shook by the down home grit of this show. By the actual pain from the characters. By the higher heat concept. By Korea actually going THERE.

And then these babies came along...

9 The 8th Sense

I just didn't think Korea had it in them. Yes, I realize now that it was a bit navel gazey, and we were weighted heavily towards the seme and his pain. I would have liked a better balance between the leads, but that's in retrospect.

At the time I couldn't believe it. A KBL dealing with mental health?

And can we talk about those sex scenes? How insanely comfortable the actors were with each other? How easy in each other's personal space? I've not seen anything else quite like that from Korea. It's super rare. I had assumed they, culturally, just didn't do casual intimacy, or if they did, it wasn't allowed on screen.

Of course now I know the CAN do it, I want more.

10 Love for Love's Sake

Okay, lots to unpack with this one. A genuine isakai BL, in the original sense of the term. The death twist didn't shake me up, but the execution, acting, open gayness, and a couple other things did. Enough to make me still think on this show with fond surprise and affection, despite its undercurrent of darkness.

I like to be shooketh.

(source)

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kuroyuki-kokuyoku · 2 months ago

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Random TCF Related Thought - Fairy Tales

In canon proper, we know that fairy tales do exist in Nameless 1, or at least, fiction geared towards children.

Well, I was reading some TCF React fics and found a hilarious moment where Heni!KRS was explaining fairy tales to Cale's kids and was shooketh to find out that Cale had butchered some of Earth's classic fairy tales into loosely-based-on stories (to put it gently) cuz apparently the "princess-in-distress" trope would not be relatable if every princess IRL they know could easily save themselves in a simailar or same situation. Therefore, Badass Action Girl!Princesses FTW.

Where am I going with this?

So my shower thought is that Cale one day decided to invoke his inner Brothers Grimm and published his own book series based off of Earth's classic fairy tales.

But here's the twist: He uses the Walt Disney versions but made every Disney Princess BAMFs.

Sorry, Mr. Walt Disney. Your own versions of Earth's classic fairy tales were a product of your time, but your 50s sensibilities won't fly when all of the princesses Cale knows can easily break a full grown man man in tiny little pieces, physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Besides, he wants little girls like On and Lily to have strong female role models to aspire to be even if it's in fiction.

Sleeping Beauty? Aurora is based on Roselyn. She finds out that she got cursed by Maleficent, who is a whole Dragon that her father had offended by failing to invite her to his unborn daughter's christening like he promised, so she threw away her status as crown princess to become a mage out of spite and break the curse on her own. In the end, she succeeds and managed to tracked down Maleficent to her lair. Maleficent is so impressed by her moxie that the Dragon took her on as an apprentice. By the time, Prince Phillip shows up hoping to slay the Dragon and take Aurora back to his kingdom so they can be married, the story is already over.

Beauty and the Beast? Belle is the village chief's daughter and the most beautiful girl in the tribe. Belle is a Tiger and Lion mixed-blood Beastman and also pining after the cute human bookworm named Adam in the next village over. Dorph the greater value Gaston can go fuck himself for all she cares. TLDR: Role Reversal AU and Belle is Dark Tiger!Alberu.

Cinderella? Cinderella is a secretly a Shaman. Everything is the same up until the whole dress ruining scene. After that, Cinderella invokes the spirit of Queen Jopis, stopped giving a shit, and turned the rest of the plot into a shitshow. Her evil stepfamily is given the OG!Brothers Grimm treatment.

Pocahontas? Everything is the same except the Powhatans are all Elves. Ratcliffe is the White Bitchless.

Hunchback of Notre Dame? The plot is the same, but Esmeralda is a Dark Elf, and Quasimodo is half-Dark Elf. Frollo is replaced by Adin just so he can fall off the roof a second time.

Aladdin? Jasmine is also a thief. She looted what should've been her dowry from the Sultan, her annoying suitors' wealth, Genie's lamp, Carpet from the Cave of Wonders, Aladdin's heart, and Jafar aka the White Hobo Looking's dignity and respect, not in that order, then whisked Aladdin off of his bare feet and away to her own personal kingdom. Basically, Cale reimagined her as Fem!Hong Gildong.

The Little Mermaid? Romeo and Juliet with a happy ending where Prince Eric is a Whale Prince and Ariel is still a Mermaid, and both their families got scammed into finally burying the hatchet by Ursula.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarves? Snow White is a Dwarf too, and the plot is basically an otome where she has seven suitors from different tribes, and the Evil Queen (*couch*Elisneh*cough*) is, of course, the jealous villainess.

Brave: Everything's the same except Sayeru gets abused more than Mor'du in this book.

Frozen: Everything's the same except Prince Hans is swapped out for Sir Bernard cuz Hans the goodest butler doesn't deserve to be associated with scum.

Tangled: Everything's the same except it's Adin who takes a swan dive off of the tower.

Mulan: Everything's the same except the Huns are replaced by Arm.

#trash of the count's family #lout of the count’s family #lcf #tcf #random thoughts #shower thoughts #headcanons #cale being a dad #cale basically plagiarizing Disney movies by essentially writing fanfiction #Disney princess whom? only Henituse princesses #all princesses are queens #badass women #all the villains may or may not be based on members of Arm #still going strong on disrespecting He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Properly-Named in all my TCF related posts

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robo-milky · 2 years ago

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WAHHHHH RAPTOR !!! THIS IS TOO MUCH ;;; <3

Afjfjfjfjf Cloche looks so pwetty in your style and Omg !! Everyone looks so good too! Yuuta, Yume, Honey, Ceru, and Obi ✨✨ They— the gang all at once ^^

HEADSHOTS HEADSHOTS HEADSHOTS!!!

Gently borrowed ocs from @bunnwich, @comingyourlugubriousness, @robo-milky, @honey-milk-depresso/@honeyuuyuu, @ceruleancattail and @kimikitti

It was a blast working through y'all's designs, you guys are so creative and i admire all of you v v much <333

Closeups:

#YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS QQ #so sweet !! was not expecting this at all #SHOOKETH #twisted wonderland #twst oc #twst #others art #oc: cloche🎊#others ocs #twst ocs #twisted wonderland ocs

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sad-stucky-shipper-107 · 8 months ago

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SO MANY TWIST ALKFJKSL

Famous last words

WHO IS THIS HOTTIE?!

Tanaka lets be honest, ur only jealous cuz he has more rizz than u

Famous last words

GUYS OIKAWA’S KICKING ASS OMFG

HE’S SO EXCITED PLZ

HOLY SHIT HINATA

HOLY SHIT ASDFHSKDLSFSLDGAKL HINATA BABY

HE SCARED OIKAWA LMFAO

Oikawa is shooketh

OIKAWA WANTS THEM TWINKS OBLITERATED LMFAO

TAKEDA SENSEI IS U OK?

SUGA IS SO PROUD

I’ve been given minor spoilers so all im gonna say is *eyes emoji*

SENSEI ILY

HINATA MY BABY

OIKAWA REALLY SAID ‘SHAWTY’

WHOMST?!

#lu watches haikyuu #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#hinata shoyo #shoyo hinata #kageyama tobio #kagehina #daichi sawamura #sugawara koushi #tsukishima kei #tsukkishima kei #yamaguchi tadashi #takeda ittetsu #tanaka ryuunosuke #oikawa tooru

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roleplayisms · 2 months ago

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SHIT ME AND THE BESTIES SAY

* a compilation of silly things said between me and my friends on discord. change pronouns as needed. some triggering or inappropriate content may be present.

you took one look at it and decided it was so sexy i couldn't have done it

she's an everything bagel bitch isn't she

strike first, strike hard, hydrate yourself

i'll go full gremlin

YOU ARE SUCH A LITTLE SHIT

they saw each other, asked 'is anyone going to loathe him?' and didn't wait for an answer

i only write with hotties

okay baddie!

the gasp that i gusped

that is a big part of it and that is why my therapist hates you

they're called wisdom teeth because if you were wise you'd die before having to have them removed

look i can't wait for her to get stabbed

i said infiltrate the enemy not penetrate the enemy

i'll have fun in my mojo dojo danish casa house by MYSELF

it's not traumatizing enough, there needs to be PAIN

i can't math, i'm bi what do you want from me

but who are we shit talking? is it me? that bitch deserves it i know

you are? i are too

hey buddy. name. buddy. bud. fuck you

i had to, how you say, share the wealth

she's never mean to me and i just get to watch and giggle, it's a win win

oh my god can we both be bears

you can't divorce me we have a soul tie silly

we shared the trauma because we are all in this together

this is so anxietycore of us bye

i think she had some repressed emotions

it was not mindful or demure

for better and worse. we're all demons together. holding hands evilly.

ah beans my arm has been twisted

son no he'll kill you!

is this the start of your hear me out cake? because immediately no

he's like a stale peep

play tonight or die

if i can scare men into leaving me alone that's a win for me personally

want me to stab her? it'll be a baby stab. not fatal

you don't know our inventory!

can you humble my best friend, she's mean

they can metaphorically tell me in dumb words because what the shit

we love self deprecating kings!

don't want to disappoint santa . . . or jesus

kiss it better and we're even

am i killing my organs?

took my valium cheers lmfao

for legal reasons this is a joke

i don't think i'm the only one whose name is bitch here!!!!

our new names are bitchy and bitchier, and i don't know who bitchier is

you wanna like .... pick who goes into hell

netflix has put the age limit of gilmore girls as 10+ because of the "horror" elements. what horror netflix? the horror of becoming your parents?

hello, i am born and bred in the asshole factory

yes i will pet you like a moth

he is both slim and shady

in fact I am going to BECOME a capybara. not just be around them

life is a horror movie

WHY DO WE HAVE A KNIFE

oh is grandpa gonna commit a murder?

i have no words. i am shooketh

quit crying over the hunger games

the cobra koolaid tasted like booty anyway

i barely tolerate you

but name missa love you

he's crispy and hard on the outside but still soft and gooey on the inside

YOU KILLED YOUR WIFE. AGAIN.

can i hide in your closet and will you bring me snacks?

hey assholes. we don't beat up our friends

this show stresses me out

I'M GONNA BEAT HIS LITTLE BIRD ASS

#ref | meme #ask meme #*rpi meme #rp meme #meme #cursing tw #suggestive tw #violence mention tw #just in case fkjghfdkjghdf

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junocandraw · 3 months ago

Note

What are some of your takes on any of The Morgue Files characters? :>

EEEEEK! WHAT A QUESTION!!! :D

Okay. So. This is going to be long because im VERY opinionated on the audio drama. I watched them probably a million times while i was working on a wall mural in my parent’s bathroom.

JEFF

Don’t get me wrong. Emo edgelord mcr stan sigma boy Jeff is GREAT. Its a CLASSIC. BUT. Its overdone. Its exhausting to see the same cycle of kid moves to a new town, kid gets bullied, kid goes crazy BECAUSE he gets bullied, in every single Jeff story.

David’s is unique in that Jeff was just BORN THAT WAY. he was born sick. he was like that the day he popped out of the womb. i also like how he leaves slenderman’s impact on him so vague. when you listen to the pinehearst sessions, jeff doesn’t call anyone out by name, he just uses super vague pronouns to describe the collective. “I’ve seen them.” “I know what they’re planning.” etc. etc.

not to mention the bloody parts? oh. perfection. he wanted to “wear” Christy? 10/10. my timbers were shivered. I can vividly remember the first time I listened to the video and I was just…jaw dropped. Its insane that you can understand everything thats going on gore-wise just by audio.

In short? David’s take was REFRESHING. It was new. It broke that cycle. It even influenced some aspects of the rewrite i did. (shameless plug there ;D)

TOBY

One thing that is glaringly obvious with this one is that the mental-illness portion was portrayed SO MUCH BETTER than the original. Toby was so much more believable in his struggles. I really felt sorry for the guy. You put it best when you said “he was just dealt a bad hand in life.”

Also, the brainwashing portion at the bitter end with slenderman was just great. it was amazing. AND THE LYRA PLOT TWIST???? DONT. GET. ME. STARTED. I WAS SHOOKETH. i wont spoil for all you peoples who haven’t listened to it but its CRAZY.

This one is my second favorite. Its great. Its scary. I loved it.

JACK

Honestly? INCREDIBLY underrated. THIS one is probably tied in first with Jeff. I can’t pick between them because Jeff just holds a special, nostalgic place in my heart, but this one. Ooh. This one.

Jack was the least of my concerns with this one. I’m talking about detective kent and poor sergeant norris. when the you-know-what happened with all of the proxies, my stomach was flipped. I forgot that it was even allowed to happen in this genre. in Hollywood, someone would have swooped in last minute and saved them, but that didn’t happen here. It just goes to show you how twisted david is willing to get.

we also get a lot of tim and brian in this episode!! i love them. i made a post about creepypasta and marble hornet crossovers, and this is a perfect example of a one thats done well. he didn’t make tim a measly little twink, or brian a shy wallflower, but he instead made his own, creative take on both characters. And its great. its all great.

i would dish my opinion on the sally one, but its been a hot minute since i watched it lol. ive watched all of these in the last month or two. I remember the one guy named like…aiden? or something? he disturbed me. i dont remember much else lol.

ONE MORE THING!! Im not sure if hes allowed to do this, but I think a HABIT cameo in one would be SICK. with HABIT’s gorey methods of murder and david’s twisted writing, that could be something AWESOME. maybe im just a die hard emh fan tho…idk…

anyways thank you for listening to my insane ramblings and GO WATCH THE MORGUE FILES IF YOU HAVEN’T EVEN IF YOU DONT LIKE CREEPYPASTA THEY’RE GREAT!! :D

#the morgue files #morgue files #david near #audio drama #i love these so much help

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quitealotofsodapop · 1 year ago

Note

The crew listens to Epic: the Musical.

MK's favorite song is Legendary.

Wukong identifies with Just a Man (not that he'll admit it).

Macaque likes Ruthlessness because he's an emo little stinker.

Sandy likes Open Arms (of course).

Tang and Red Son like Warrior of the Mind.

Pigsy really thinks the monkeys should take Luck Runs Out to heart.

Mei likes Keep Your friends close (a fun bop that belies danger underneath, just like her).

I have to be careful binging a new muscial (or in this case Saga) cus I end up playing each song on loop for hours. Opinions might change once the full and finished versions of later sagas are released.

I love all these hcs <3

Im imagining the gang likely sees/listens to Epic on the reccomendation of MK (who's currently on a Greek Mythology hyperfixation), and he gets them all to watch the full play - maybe in the future as a irl performance or film.

"Legendary" is SUCH an MK song. Both him and Telemachus growing up with the stories of someone dear to them and wanting to replicate their success. I could also see him really liking "Warrior of the Mind" with the theme of "some nobody" gaining the favor of a god (reminds you of anyone?) + SWK is infamously the personification of The Mind in Jttw so its a bonus. MK is smiling evily whenever a harsh plot twist occurs and his fam are shocked silent. >:3

Sun Wukong feels targeted personally with how many of the Epic songs remind him of his past. Ofc he starts crying halfway through "Horse and the Infant", and is inconsolable during "Just A Man" - verbally yelling "NO!" at the end. And like Nezha and Sandy is *silent* during Posideon's songs. Is super jazzed during the triumphant Ithaca Saga though! And feels mega catharic during "King" when Odysseus proves that he still rules to the suitors! He tries his best to hide how much the muscial is affecting him.

Macaque is a canon theatre Nerd - so he's already listened to the musical multiple times, but he's uber excited to see the live performance (and secretly bond with his found fam). Is rocking out during "Ruthlessness" and "Done For" in particular, so much so that he's fidgeting and dancing within his seat. He also vibes with "No Longer You" as someone with powers of prophecy. Is really amazed how much Wukong gets into the musical, but in retrospect understands *why*. Him and Wukong accidentally share a glance during "Would You Fall In Love With Me Again" and it gets a little awkward afterwards.

Mei is similarly excited to see anything with her bestie, so she tried her best not hear/see any spoilers ("it's a centuries' old story Mei" "Ssssh!! Dont tell me!"). She was shooketh by how hard the muscial goes. "Keep Your Friends Close" is her fave based on beat alone. She gets delightedly scared and amazed by consistent horse imagery used with Posideon (shameless link to my fave Animatic of "Ruthlessness").

Tang loves himself some historical and mythological adaptations, and is estatic that MK has given him an excuse to go see one! He's not as familar with Hellenic mytholgy as he is with Hindu-Chinese, but he knows enough lore to make the pog-champ face at every foreshadowing/reference. "Warrior of the Mind" really gets to him as a song about valuing your smarts. He also feels really empathetic for Calypso.

Pigsy only went cus Tang begged him. He feels super lost by the deep Greek lore he's missing, but he can get Odysseus's whole thing with trying to get home - but he def identifies more with Eurylochus. "Luck Runs Out" proves this to him. Later on he feels that the second-in-command was justified in having the soldiers rebel against Odysseus after so many losses (who wouldn't after losing all their friends?). Audibly gasps at the end of "Just A Man" - cus who would just do that!? Is a little freaked out by Circe turning the Athenian's into pigs - Eurylochus is depicted as partly-transformed, played by a pig-demon actor who was in super convincing human makeup in the previous sagas. He also gets protective feelings by-proxy seeing Telemachus's situation since the prince reminds him of MK. Is surprised by how much he likes the musical!

Sandy feels betrayed. This isn't like Disney Hercules at all! He does really enjoy Polites message in "Open Arms" and the later moments when the hopeful soldier's outlook is proven correct. He's a little overwhelmed at points though - he get eerily quiet during Posideon's scenes. He sobs joyfully when Odysseus finally makes it home and reunites with his family! :')

Because of this really good animatic/almost child-like depiction of Aelous by gigi; I can def see "Keep Your Friends Close" being Nezha's fave. It reminds Nezha of when he was far more carefree + has a solid lesson on about trust/"forbidden fruit". He also enjoys the more march-like tune of "Survive". He does however, freeze when he listens to Posideon's songs "Ruthlessness" and "Get in the Water" - he has been on the bad end of a sea god before and is quietly shtting himself for Odysseus.

Red Son goes in feeling like he could have stayed at home listening to the musical on his phone while working on a car instead. He is however blown away by the heavy themes and performances, especially "Warrior of the Mind" and Telemachus's situation - a prince forced to grow up fatherless and protecting his mother from suitors due to his dad pissing off a higher power? Hello?? Accidentally shrieks "YES!!!" when Athena becomes Telemachus's mentor/friend after "Little Wolf".

Princess Iron Fan I could see loving any song including Penelope (she empathizes with the Queen's situation hard), but unexpectedly enjoys "Keep Your Friends Close" - she's a fellow Wind Goddess at her core. It also reminds her of her not-so-little-anymore nephew.

DBK on the flip side loves the heavier songs like "Polyphemus" and "Ruthlessness". This man is a Posedion apologist. He does feels bad for Odysseus by the end though - man just wants to get back to his wife and kid dammit!

Bonus: The Spider Gang are watching the bootleg and Spider Queen agrees with Circe's whole girlboss attitude especially "Puppeteer". Scorpion Queen is Calypso in "Not Sorry For Loving You".

This got a little away from me - hope you enjoy!

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