#the thing that's pissing me off personally is that i actually grinded a lot to have enough mats for 150+ wishes to ensure that i could get

[yuuhta]

no turning back

pairing: gojou satoru/fem! reader

MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI

short description: you decide to give gojou satoru a blowjob once, just once.

it was all a spur of the moment.

honestly, you wanted to slap yourself, just in case this was all a dream.

any other day, any other moment, you would've sworn you won't ever come close to gojou satoru's dick.

not a drop of alcohol is in your system, heck, you're completely fucking sober.

but here you are, legs wrapped around the waist of the said man, his tongue going in and out of your own mouth.

if only you didn't realize that he's not really an asshole, and if only he really was an asshole, you wouldn't even think twice about going near gojou satoru. actually, yeah, you would still do it, you would still kiss him, but you would've bitten and ripped his tongue off.

to your slight dismay, he's actually a good person. he might be rude and can be a douchebag at times, but it's definitely true that he's on the good side.

you didn't know about his plans and true intentions as a jujutsu sorcerer at first, but suddenly remembering some stuff like the fact that he's actually good to his students and he's not on the higher ups' side, your opinion about him has drastically changed.

well, he's still a fuck boy, but it's not like you'll fall in love with him.

>>

after a few minutes of continuously making out passionately, tongues dancing together, exploring each other’s mouths like long lost fucking lovers rediscovering one another, you finally decided to disentangle yourself from satoru, the heat you feel in your core going wild.

“i want to taste you.”

taken aback at his request, fuelling the shitty desire starting to bubble inside you, you gazed questioningly into his eyes. but no, you were still sane, there is no way in hell are you gonna let him near your pussy.

"no, i want to suck you off." you said plainly, as if you weren't down on each other's throats just a few minutes ago. you will never give him the satisfaction of knowing he managed to turn you on. ha!

your gaze fell upon his hard cock beneath his trouser. embarrassed yet determined, you pushed gojou, signalling him to sit on the chair behind him, "now, open it." you bent down on your knees as you watched him struggle opening his pants.

when he was done, your eyes widened at the length that sprung free, he took hold of his girth and softly stroked the length, you watched as his expression change. when satoru's mouth fell a bit open, your confidence grew.

you grabbed a hold of his dick, slowly lowering your head down to the tip.

he was unexpectedly quiet. satoru has always been annoyingly loud whenever he was around, so you expected him to be the type to actually moan a lot whenever under great pleasure like this.

you thought you weren't doing a good job, considering that this is your first time engaging in any sexual activity, but when you looked at him and saw his lidded eyes stare down at you so intensely, you think you're doing okay.

you don't really care if you break the mood, so, you pulled away, and just straightforwardly asked him. "am i doing good?"

he blinked at you. you thought he was going to get pissed and then probably try to hide it to make you go down on him again, but he just chuckled, eyes softening.

"you are. look at what you're doing to me." he smirked, pointing at his dick with his beautiful blue eyes. "and am not lying."

at first, you thought he was just stroking your ego just for the sake of the suck, but he was already hard even before you started touching him down there. prior the blowjob, when it was just a make out session with you, he was already grinding himself on your body like a deprived, thirsty hoe.

and the thing is, you've heard from others that it takes a few minutes to get him in the mood because it's difficult for them to get him hard. you joked around with them and said he probably destroyed his dick from sleeping around way too much, but apparently, he really just don't feel good with them that much.

you felt a strange sense of pride at that realization. somehow, you managed to turn on the infamous gojou satoru faster than anyone else. it was both thrilling and terrifying.

"well, don't just stare at it," satoru teased, his voice husky with desire. "put that pretty mouth of yours back to work."

you rolled your eyes but complied, wrapping your lips around him once more. his breath hitched as you took him a bit deeper, your tongue swirling around his shaft. you heard him try to muffle a moan, and it spurred the shit out of you on so much.

satoru's hand found its way into your hair, gently guiding your movements. you looked up at him through your lashes, noting the way his hair was disheveled--more than ever. his cheeks were flushed with pleasure. it was a sight you never thought you'd see.

you continued your ministrations, encouraged by the soft grunts and gasps escaping satoru's lips. his fingers tightened in your hair as you hollowed your cheeks, increasing the suction. you could feel him trembling slightly, his control slipping.

"fuck, y/n..." he breathed, his voice strained. "you're...surprisingly good at this."

you hummed around him in response, the vibrations making him buck his hips involuntarily. you placed your hands on his thighs to steady yourself, feeling the taut muscles beneath your fingertips, tears slightly prick the edge of your eyes as his unwelcomed tip continuously bumped to your throat.

as you worked him with your mouth, you couldn't help but wonder how you'd ended up here. it had started with an argument after the meeting with all the staff from jujutsu high, both tokyo and kyoto branches. this has always been just your interactions with satoru. but somehow, the heated words had turned into heated touches, and before you knew it, you were pinned against the wall with his lips on yours.

you pulled back slightly, running your tongue along the underside of his length before taking him deep again, gagging unintentionally at your own action. satoru's head fell back, a low moan escaping him. it was intoxicating, having this much power over someone like him.

"i'm close," he warned, his voice rough.

you doubled your efforts, determined to see this through. just a few seconds later, satoru tensed, his release spreading through your tongue, and hitting the back of your throat as you continued to bob your head to make him ride his high. you swallowed, even though it was quite hard to do so (it's your fucking first time to even go near a dick), continuing to suck gently until he was spent.

as you pulled away, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, you looked up at satoru. his eyes were closed, chest heaving as he caught his breath. when he finally opened them, the intensity of his gaze made your heart skip a beat.

"bye." you abruptly said, quickly turning on your heel to get out of the meeting room, your heart suddenly picking up its pace after realizing what the heck just happened.

"your turn," he said with a smirk, his fingers tracing down your thighs as he pulled you up for a searing kiss. and you still had the audacity to wrap your damn legs around his waist.

and as his hands roamed your body, you realized that this was far from over. what had started as a one-time thing was quickly spiraling into something more. something dangerous. something you weren't sure you were ready for, but couldn't bring yourself to stop.

[melodic-haze]

alright think about this jealous sex with arlecchino. Maybe she’s been hanging out with columbina too much.

☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Arlecchino x dom!Reader

☆ — TYPE: NSFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: Thr briefest mention of petplay, rough sex ig, that's basically it 🤷‍♀️

Ohhhhmygod the way Arlecchino talks of her so very fondly too like it's VERY easy to be jealous I think. Like I'm not really a jealous or a possessive person but even then I'd give like a slight side eye

The Knave was just spending a BIT too much time with Columbina for your tastes. You ask if you could hang out w her, she tells you she has a prior engagement with the other Harbinger. You go to talk to her, she's already talking with Damselette. Frankly, she's acc taking the piss❗️❗️❗️

It just. Drives you up the FUCKING WALL but yk. "Do unto others what you want done to you" or smth like that idk the saying

"I-- I'm going to--"

"You are not doing anything unless I tell you to."

You feel her hands grip onto your hair as you practically abused her cunt with your fingers. If you weren't pinning her to the wall and holding her up, you were sure that as formidable as she was, her legs would've buckled down from the overwhelming stimulation and the lack of release whenever she reached her very peak.

(With the strength of her grip, youu also thanked archons above that despite everything, she was careful enough to not claw at your scalp. That wasn't the most important thing right now, though.)

"You know," you idly mused—taunted, even—as you curled your digits within her, "we could've been doing something better. We could've been having tea, tending to your children, having so much more fun than this. And yet what do you do?"

You pulled your fingers away, slick glistening and forming a faintly connecting line before snapping, and you hear a desperate whimper that you pointedly ignore, "You pass all that up for your fellow Harbinger."

"But she can't make you feel good like I do, can she?" You slapped her thigh harshly, to which you ignore her surprised gasp too—you knew she could handle much more anyway, "Nobody else can have you all pliant and breathless like this. Not her, not anyone."

Arlecchino actually makes a move to nod instead of standing there all dumb, "Only.. Only for you.. my love, I--"

"Only for me?"

"Yes..!"

Answering like an over-eager dog. Actually hilarious.

You stand up and press your fingers harshly inside of her, and just when she feels utter delight in tbe thought of you finally granting mercy on a sinner such as her?

"Move."

"..What?"

"You heard me, my love," the affectionate pet name overshadowed by your mocking tone, "if you want to get off, then move. Surely you can manage such a simple task, right?"

It's unsaid that you want her to move on her own to show her dedication to you...

But either she caught on or she was desperate for the feeling of you inside her, for she leaned her head and started to grind her pussy onto your offered hand.

Only you were allowed to command her like this.

Need to constantly alternate between edging her and overstimming her, both to such UNBEARABLE levels bc SURELY she can handle it 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Absolutely use her in ANY way you could think of; by this point she's a hole for you to use and vent your jealousy to, all while repeating some kinda mantra about how Columbina could never do the things you do to her

Remind her that only YOU could make her feel the things she does, remind her that only YOU could have her bend to your will, both literally and metaphorically. Doesn't matter to you how powerful she is!! Could be an eldrich horror and you don't gaf

At the end of the day, you have utterly corrupted her—trained her—in the ways that she (or anyone) had never imagined. You've absolutely ruined her for everyone else

You just. Need to remind her with a LOT of torture 🥰 break this supposed monster all over again, make her remember just who, exactly, tamed her 🥰🥰🥰

Whether it's by stuffing her with so many toys all in the lowest settings or absolutely filling her up over and over and over and OVER until all traces of the angel-like Harbinger is completely fucked out of her mind 🫶🫶🫶🫶

[icyrambles]

of all my transformers takes, i feel like the one that'll get me sent directly to fandom hell is my feral hatred of the term "femme"

like genuinely it's such a stupid term. not because i don't think the robots can't have gender. because i do think they have some concept of gender. but because it's just woman 2.0

like you've got this super interesting alien species. they've got their own culture, their own language, their own ideas of sexuality and right and wrong, and their own religion. and to see most of the fandom look at that and go "but what if i just made man and woman but for robots" pisses me off

it makes me mad because it's fucking boring as shit. you've got all this cool worldbuilding and lore and you decide that the best thing to do when discussing robot gender is just to give them human gender but slightly to the left

"but icy, how to you distinguish the women transformers from the male ones?"

just fucking use mech for all of them. i use mech/mecha as a catch all term. it's my replacement for person or man or guy. like when someone says "you guys" they could obviously be referring to a group of all men, but let's be real here, "you guys" as it is used in colloquial english, is a gender neutral term despite having a more gendered term within it.

and it's specifically the term femme that grinds my gears. i don't have any issues with people headcanoning characters using she/her pronouns. i think that's cool as hell because pronouns do not equate to gender and in a fandom where like, 90% of the characters use he/him it's nice to see some switchups for pronouns because it gets a little repetitive after a while. but the term femme just tells me that you subscribe to the idea that the alien robot species who do not have the same concepts and ideas of gender as humans do, somehow managed to craft together the exact same gender concepts as an organic species halfway across the galaxy.

and i'm sure someone might be like "well it's not a gender thing" but i only ever see the term femme used to describe a canon character who uses she/her pronouns (like arcee or elita-1) or to describe a fandom headcanon that revolves around a character using she/her pronouns (like starscream or ravage) it has everything to do with how the fandom seems to cling to the idea that cybertronians have to have the same concepts of gender for humans

i've been in this fandom for a little over a year and despite going through forums and tumblr posts and even looking at twitter for a tiny bit, i've yet to see an actual attempt at exploring the concepts of cybertronian gender.

so here's mine; taken from my worldbuilding ideas that i'm sorting out for my in the works fan continuity

cybertronian gender, like a lot of their societal norms, is tied to one's altmode.

as taken from the marriam-webster dictionary: gender is - a subclass within a grammatical class (such as noun, pronoun, adjective, or verb) of a language that is partly arbitrary but also partly based on distinguishable characteristics (such as shape, social rank, manner of existence, or sex) and that determines agreement with and selection of other words or grammatical forms

now applying that to a species that has the specific characteristic of being able to literally change shape with the assistance of an internal organ (ie the t-cog) leads me to the idea that instead of gender being based on the biological sex like it is for humans, gender is instead rooted in the altmode.

the terms of seeker and speedster are adjectives to describe the altmode of a cybertronian, but also can describe the gender. this isn't meant to be a direct 1-1 copy of human ideas of sex and gender but instead a theoretical worldbuilding exercise in how a species that does not reproduce in a sexual manner would develop similar concepts of personal expressions through their established canon biology.

within my worldbuilding. the common language packs of cybertron come with three sets of standard, altmode neutral pronouns. these roughly translated into english, are he, she, and they. notice how i said altmode neutral pronouns. that's because most altmodes have their own sets of established pronouns that crop up within the groups.

this particular idea ties in with how my versions of cybertronians communicate. basically cybertronians communicate both via verbal speech, such as talking using a vocaliser, but also via manipulating their EM fields, and attaching non-verbal alterations to their spoken words via radio waves and the EM field.

so the pronoun [He] when used in a sentence, might have extra attachments added onto it.

EX: [He (positive/neutral) went to my house the other day.]

So in this case the speaker is referring to someone in a positive or neutral manner.

Here's another one using pronouns on a personal level when referring to one's self.

EX: [Hello. (courteous) My name is Starscream (Vosian - Seeker). I use He/Him (Neutral) pronouns.]

This is a typical cybertronian style of greeting. It includes a hello to the other party/s, the title of the individual along with their region of origin/residence and altmode, and finally their preferred set or sets of altmode neutral pronouns. In this case, Starscream would tag his "Hello" with a neutral emotion, being courteous but not excited because the mech he's talking to is someone he doesn't know but isn't enemies with. He then attaches his region of origin "Vos" and his altmode group "Seeker" and finally caps it off with his preferred set of pronouns "He/Him" which has a neutral emotion modifier tagged onto it because while it's his preferred set of pronouns in the neutral sense, it's not what he'd like to be using all the time.

he/him, she/her, and they/them are all equally neutral and for all cybertronians they exist in a state of purely personal preference. there's nothing about arcee using she/her pronouns that makes her more woman gendered anymore than starscream using he/him pronouns makes him male gendered. that's just human bias. they're robots, so they don't view themselves in the same way. those sets of pronouns, again, are merely translated into english for the reader's convenience.

Now I've thrown around the term "altmode neutral" quite a bit so here's an explanation for that.

Cybertronians with the same or similar altmodes will often develop languages and cultures surrounding those altmodes, similar to how many cultures and identities are developed through similarities with each other. This varies from region to region, with many languages and cultures not meshing together even if those mecha have the same altmode.

A jet like Pharma who was raised in Iacon around primarily ground based altmodes tends to use pronouns specific to grounder based language families while someone like Starscream or Thundercracker, who are from Vos, use altmode specific pronouns indicative of language families developed by mostly flight frames.

The common language data pack exists as an easy way for mecha to communicate with each other without potentially butchering another individual's native language. While one could theoretically download a whole language into their brain module, their actual speech would likely sound distorted or unnatural due to the fact that the brain module only retains the information that was on the download and is unable to account for things like accents, region dialects, and other such nuances in languages

Altmode specific pronouns are often tagged with extra modifiers and would function similarly to the concept of neo pronouns in english.

Megatron as an example has a tank altmode and his specific altmode pronouns are chk/chiks and using them in spoken dialogue would require one to either create a noice similar to a tank canon loading with their vocaliser, or in another tank's case, would simply have them use their own tank barrel to produce the noise.

flight frames often clank their wings together or whistle as their altmode specific pronouns. speedsters will revv their engines. smaller cars like bumblebee or cliffjumper will beep their horns, and ambulances like ratchet will whoop their sirens.

going back to my "pharma raised in iacon" example. he's a jet, but rather than clanking his wings together, he'll utilize his inbuilt siren (installed while he was in medical school) as his altmode specific pronouns. it, roughly translated to written form is wheep/whoop

this also extends to preferences for partners. i've seen people joke about how ratchet has a thing for speedsters because of his thing with drift and rodimus, but genuinely i do think that within the idea of altmodes being tied to gender, mecha would develop preferences for certain altmodes.

and when i say preference, i do mean just a preference. altmodes are fluid things within cybertronian society. megatron, as an example, is a gun, a tank, and a heavy bomber plane across varying continuities, yet at the end of the day, he's still megatron. his altmode is not what defines him as a character.

therefore i think changing altmodes is purely a thing that's tied to economic status. it's very expensive to have the whole exoframe completely reformatted so those who regularly change their altmodes either have shanix to spare, or have saved up enough money to have the procedures done.

this is even touched upon within idw's version of cybertron, what with the existence of relinquishment clinics, where mecha will go and donate their frames for money, and then those shells can be bought so another individual can have a new altmode.

when a mech decides to have their altmode changed they'll often shift up their altmode specific pronouns too. a smaller car changing altmodes into a bigger vehicle will instead honk their horn instead of beeping or maybe they'll revv their engines louder just to signify that they've changed altmodes.

going back to my sentence examples. here's one with ratchet and pharma introducing themselves to a patient

EX:

Ratchet: Hello (positive/friendly/welcoming) My name is Ratchet (Vaporex - Ambulance - Medic) I use He/Him (Positive) and siren whoops pronouns.

Pharma: Hello (kind). My name is Pharma (Iacon - Jet - Medic). I use He/Him and clanks wings/whoops sirens pronouns.

like i said, this isn't meant to be a direct 1-1 with human genders. cybertronian altmodes within my fan continuity defy more than just how another individual views them. they can signify occupation, social standing, and economic class. and some mecha even choose to disregard their altmodes entirely when it comes to their personal expression, sticking exclusively to the gender neutral pronouns.

anyways this post is half rant half worldbuilding so if ya made it to the end i'd be happy to hear your thoughts. and as always, if you liked this post please feel free to reblog :]

[cupcakemolotov]

Ex's and Oh's: Part Two

Warnings: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence; Alternate Universe - Werewolves Are Known; Minor Character Death; Magical Realism; We Make War Not Love; Post-Divorce; These Two Fools in Love; Klaus and Caroline Being Territorial; for each other; tyler is dead; kind of; Canon-Typical Violence; Violence; Murder; Werewolf!Klaus; Human!Caroline

Caroline's return to New Orleans is a little less triumphant than she'd like. There is a dead body in her trunk and a magical artifact in her passenger seat, and no matter how much she'd like too, the chances of avoiding her ex-husband are astronomically small. What, with the mate bond and all, but a girl's gotta hope.

“Caroline, why are we here?” Bonnie asked as she looked around at the familiar bar they’d once visited regularly before. Before.

Caroline looked up from her pile of beer battered fries. “I missed you?”

Bonnie gave her a look. “I missed you too, but I expected this chat to happen like, three days from now. You know, once you settled in and actually had the time to try that thing most of us do called communicating with your ex.”

“We should definitely go out again soon,” Caroline agreed with a nod. “This time with cocktails instead of beer, maybe during that dinner you could give me a list of who these mythical ex’s of yours are that you’d willing talk to. I only have the Curse on Sight bullet point list saved to my phone.”

“Caroline,” Bonnie said in fond exasperation. “You know what I mean. When you called and asked for your boxes, I was expecting to play delivery girl, not go out for an impromptu dinner. Please tell me you’re not doing this to avoid Klaus.”

“Hey,” Caroline protested as she gestured towards her food. “I’m hungry, and being hangry cannot improve this situation on any level.”

“Sure,” Bonnie drawled, “but there is no way you can convince me Klaus doesn’t have food in his house. I know how many calories werewolves consume in a day and it’s a lot.”

“He might have a house full of food, but there was nothing to eat.” Nothing she wanted. Not a single emergency bag of Doritos, no chocolate bars tucked away on a shelf, no decent cheese. The freezer hadn’t even contained a quart of emergency ice cream. She wanted to eat her feelings, and Bonnie was lucky she’d agreed to actual food instead of eating her weight in pie.

“Fine, I’ll give you that,” Bonnie allowed. “I’m not saying you owe him anything, but did you at least tell him you were going out?”

“Klaus,” Caroline said with false cheer. “Wasn’t there when I woke up, so I decided he didn’t get an opinion.”

Bonnie groaned and covered her eyes. “Haven’t you had enough rampaging werewolves today?”

“Eh,” Caroline said dismissively. “This morning was hardly a rampage, and you know it. Besides, torturing Tyler is absolutely a form of stress relief. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Probably. Bonnie was right, it would definitely piss him off that she’d left, and what she’d left him would not improve the situation. Dunking a fry into her pile of ketchup, she wrestled with the truth that she wasn’t in a mood yet to improve things.

I know a war when I see one.

Those words had haunted her as she’d fallen asleep, and had resonated in her chest when she’d woken. This felt like a war. Her own personal fight for something she wanted so badly she’d buried it under the ash and smoke of her temper, the scorched earth of her hurt. Wanted so badly and yet, no idea how to move past that anger.

Bonnie made a noise. “I knew we should have gone to Marcel’s.”

Her jaw clenched so hard, Caroline thought she could hear her teeth grinding. “No pack.”

“You can’t avoid them forever.” The words were said carefully, her best friend far too aware of that sore-point.

“Oh, I won’t,” Caroline said, flashing her teeth. “I really, really won’t.”

Thoughtfully, Bonnie relented enough to pick up her own fry. “What did Klaus tell you before he went off torture Tyler’s remains?”

Caroline shrugged. “He’s made changes, he’s the almighty ruler who rules with an iron fist, murder murder, the usual.”

I miss you.

She missed him.

Muttering something pithy, Bonnie pulled out a small bundle of herbs and dumped them on a convenient plate between them. A moment later, the familiar scent of burning sage brought a deluge of memories of ten years ago, and Caroline swallowed past the unexpected lump in her throat.

How often had she and Bonnie sat in this booth with sage burning between them, tipsy from cocktails? How many burgers had been consumed in the name of girl’s night? How often had she wished she could do this again as she sat alone in a random diner, eating pie and rapidly texting the second most important person in her life?

“Caroline,” Bonnie huffed. “You know people are straining to hear every word you say. People have been staring for the last ten minutes, there is no way the locals aren’t already gossiping.” Pointedly she glared at someone over Caroline’s shoulder.

“Nothing I said so far should be a surprise, they’ve all lived with his ego as long as I have.” Caroline said, emphasizing her words with the jab of a french fry.

Bonnie made a face in silent agreement. “I am absolutely not on team Klaus, but this separation hasn’t been easy for either of you.”

Caroline looked away for a moment, because she didn’t know how to explain the tangle in her chest, the way it’d felt like a fist when she’d woken alone in a bed that smelled just like her best dreams. Tired, bruises stiff and aching, she wanted him there and she was mad he wasn’t, and she was mad at herself for being mad about it. Showering had required that she clench her hands into fists not to sniff test everything in the shower, wanting his scent in her lungs.

“I know.” Her lips flattened. “I don’t know how to do easy anymore, Bonnie.”

“When have you ever?”

Caroline reluctantly smiled. “Klaus and I… we didn’t really have a lot of time to talk before he had to leave.” She would have been mad about that, that he’d disappeared so soon after the first time they’d seen each other in years, but she was firmly anti-zombie, so she had decided to be gracious about it. She just wasn’t sure what to do about the rest of it. What they had said. Their conversation had felt too personal, too raw to repeat out loud. “He wants me to stay.”

“Oh, he definitely wants more than that,” Bonnie muttered.

A03: Part 2

Please remember all my fanfic has been locked due to AI Bots scraping A03.

[gaycrashbandicoot]

I think that a lot of trans people think that sex is an immutable irrefutable truth whereas gender is a social construct that can be played with and changed so it really grinds my gears when trans people say "no one is trying to change their sex, we are just trying to change our gender".

Like in reality both sex and gender are socially constructed, not all cultures in all points of time have had 2 male/female binary sexes and not everyone who is of the male sex or female sex has the same body or chromosomes or parts as other people with that sex and sex does not have to be the strict and binary boxes that it is.

Which is also why I like the term transsexual so much and I know a lot of people don't like it and its fine if you don't want to be called transsexual or think it isn't right for you but I hate when people label it as an outdated or transphobic term because so many people identify as transsexual and prefer transsexual to transgender.

Personally I am changing my sex and my goal is to change my sex. my gender is whatever but i am changing my sex. sex is not immutable you do not have to be one sex forever. transness is not about just gender for everyone.

And I hate when this is labelled as a "transmed/truscum" take like I am the furthest thing from a truscum, I think every good faith identity is completely fine and valid even if it seems contradictory, I think you don't need dysphoria to be trans (tho I also think what dysphoria is is often misidentified and lots of people who don't think they have dysphoria actually do but its okay if u dont think u do!) and I have never once not believed in nonbinary people. Liking the term transsexual and valuing it as your identity label is not a truscum take.

It just pisses me off when some trans people act like there is no place for the word transsexual or it is in someway weird or transphobic for trans people to use. Honestly I haven't seen a lot of this kind of thinking on tumblr but on reddit and instagram some people hate the term transsexual.

I love transsexual and I love transsexuals <3

(i also love the terms mtf and ftm and don't view those as outdated either, didn't even know people thought this until I started using reddit lol)

[captianprices40thson]

Plz write a mw2 story with all 141 members going to a bar after m/n had a successful mission. M/n got drunk and starts flirting with a LOT of guys and ghost and soap got jealous and starts acting all pissed. It ends up with ghost and soap forcing M/n to sit and shut up after him asks a guy to give him a bj.

I’m a sorry sucker and this happens all the time.

Requested: Yes

Warnings: None

Ghost and Soap are dating, both have a thing for Reader. Reader has a thing for both of them, but he doesn’t act on it.

Word count: 1.7k

Notes: Once again, class means nothing when you have fanfiction to write. I apologise for this being shorter than all the other ones, but I am not as good at writing fluff y’all. I appreciate every reblog, like and comment that I get, thank you so much for leaving a note! My requests are open and I am currently working on one. Check out what I do and don’t on my profile. Also, sorry that this took longer than expected to write. It was my birthday and I’ve been busy with everything surrounding that. If you want me to rewrite this at ALL, PLEASE TELL ME.

(Also I have no idea how flirting works. The three (3) people I’ve ever dated just sort of intimidated me and they were attracted to my sad cat personality…and probably my dedication to THE GRIND. And not to flex, but imagine Alejandro, Rudy and Valeria and take them and their personalities, they’re basically the people I dated. So obviously, I have no idea what’s going on in the dating world.)

“Cheers to another successful mission, gentleman.” Price smiled, raising his glass to the rest of the table, all of which raised their own in return. Ghost was not only not drinking due to his mask, but he was also in charge of driving everyone back, meaning he raised an empty water glass.

“Still don’t know how you managed to locate me, Y/N. I swore I was a deadman the moment my radio broke.” Gaz smiled, looking over at you, who had already begun downing your drink of choice, paid for by your captain as always.

“Yep, eyes of a bat that one.” Ghost smiled, placing an arm around you since you clearly weren’t going to respond. For some reason, Soap scoffed and spoke up.

“Ghost, come on. Everyone knows bats have terrible eyesight. Ever heard of the phrase ‘blind as a bat?’” Soap smirked, acting like he had gotten Ghost trapped in a corner when in actual fact he was highlighting his own stupidity.

“No…bats have great eyesight. ‘Blind as a bat’ is wrong and a misconception.” Ghost spoke back, taking his arm back from you and placing it on the table so he could explain to Soap more. Meanwhile, your eyes had caught sight of a guy over at the bar.

“Jesus christ. That's some eye candy right there.” You unknowingly whispered to yourself, catching the ear of Gaz who was also looking over in that direction. He smiled, understanding the appeal that the tall stranger had.

“I’m gonna go talk to him.” “I think he’s with friends. Do you really wanna bother him?” Gaz asked, looking over to you. You smiled, taking a sip of your respective drink and placing the empty glass down on the table. You pushed yourself up off the table, placing a hand down on the wood as you exited the booth.

“I have two holes, Garrick.” You informed him. He seemed to accept that answer and only after you had walked away he called out a very confused ‘what!?’

You turned back to him, motioning to your mouth and then making a circle around your ass. He looked very confused and shocked, deciding that clearly you were a lightweight right then and there and also, you were way too drunk already.

Meanwhile, Price had finally finished breaking up the ‘fight’ between Ghost and Soap about bats, which had somehow turned into them trying to figure out Obama’s last name. Ghost was insistent that Obama was his first name as a joke and Soap wasn’t picking up that Ghost was joking.

“His last name is Obama.” Soap whispered as he crossed his arms, but Ghost was already distracted with the absence of you. He looked around the booth, it felt empty without you.

“Anyone seen Y/N?” “I quite like that one, don’t lose him.” Price nodded, taking a swig of his own drink. Ghost looked over to Gaz, who put his own glass down and spoke up.

“I uhm…he just went off to go talk to some guy. He’d be over by the bar.” Gaz explained, pointing a thumb over to the bar. There were people standing in front of where Ghost assumed you would be so he couldn’t confirm you were there, but he trusted the word of Gaz over his own judgement anyday.

“Come on.” The taller man huffed, grabbing Soap’s wrist and hauling him up so that they could exit the booth, both of them having to shuffle over Gaz and Price’s laps to get out. Soap groaned, asking why he had to go with him.

“Because, you’re an asshole and you know your way around these bars better than me. Also, I don’t want to talk to anyone and we’re gonna have to go grab our man back.” Ghost responded, not letting go of Soap’s arm as they walked around the bar. There were many bright colours and people walking around, making it hard for either man to concentrate.

“I see him.” Soap spoke up, pointing over to a corner where you were sat, clearly sipping someone else's drink while you chatted to the man. They both made their way over to you and Ghost placed a hand on your shoulder.

“Y/N, Come on. We’re celebrating a win, you can’t flirt with every man you see.” Soap smiled, ushering a quick apologies to the man sitting opposite you. To no one’s surprise, he didn’t mind the fact you were talking to him. He seemed sad to see you go.

“Go celebrate with your…friends, man. I’ll see you later.” He smiled, giving you a wink as you stood up, a small blush appearing on your face. (Yeah that’s right, baby. I’m giving you charisma because you deserve it.)

“Jesus, Y/N. We don’t give you attention for three seconds and you’re already trying to get into someone’s pants?” Ghost asked as he walked you back to the bar, noticing how sad you were that you were no longer flirting with a stranger at a bar. When a small ping went off and you checked your phone to a text message from the man you were just chatting with. A picture of you being dragged back to your booth.

“How did you already get his number?” Soap whisper-shouted as he watched you smile at the message. You merely shrugged your shoulders, giving them a cat-like smirk as you walked back.

—--

“Where the fuck did that little bitch go.” Soap asked exactly two minutes after they had sat back down, looking over at the empty spot at the booth where your ass was meant to be sat. You know in cartoons where something was meant to be somewhere and the little broken white lines appear around where it should be? That's sort of what was going on in his mind.

“Bar.” Gaz simply replied. Soap’s head shot over to where Gaz had said and sure enough, you were talking to a guy who looked like he could kill you in three seconds, next to him a guy that looked as if he couldn’t harm a fly. 

“Jesus Christ, come on. Let’s get him before he gets himself into trouble.” Ghost groaned, knowing that once you were drunk you basically had no filter.

“We’ve got to strap him down next time. This is meant to be a celebration between teammates, not…not Y/N leaving the table every time he can.” Soap mumbled and Ghost stopped for a minute, looking down at his shorter companion.

“Hey…does it really bother you that much that he keeps leaving?” Ghost asked and Soap nodded, crossing his arms.

“It’s just…we’re meant to be a team, a group. We’ve just been through hell together and all Y/N can think about is hopping on the next dick he sees. I just thought we could all spend some time…together, as the fucked up family we are.” Soap admitted, making eye contact with Ghost. There was sympathy in Ghost’s tone when he spoke next.

“Well…we’re gonna get him back, place him in between us and I'm gonna take his phone so he won’t receive any messages from any other guys other than the ones he’s supposed to be with. Alright?” Ghost told him and Soap smiled, nodding as they walked up to where your horny ass was sitting.

“-And it’s like, holyyyy shit. I was nearly shot!” As both men came into earshot, they could hear you clearly describing the mission you were just on to the two men, both of them looking interested as hell. Soap looked over to Ghost, knowing they should stop you seeing as all that stuff was classified and shouldn’t be told to random’s in this bar. When Ghost was about to place his hand on your shoulder and drag you back, you decided to say something the Scot nor the Brit would expect.

“Hey, can you get me a Sidecar with a side of a BJ?” You asked the main guy you were talking to. Both military men exchanged a glance before Soap decided to step in.

“WOAH THERE, Y/N. LETS NOT.” He awkwardly spoke, placing a hand on your shoulder and making you get off the stool. You groaned something about them ruining your chance at getting lucky before immediately tripping over and falling face first on the floor.

“I apologise for him, guys.” Ghost apologised to the men before helping Soap get you off the floor. Despite being in the military causing you to go through intense physical and mental training, you really weren’t heavy to them at all, which made it easier to drag you back to the table.

____

“Yeah, this is better than being at the bar. No offence to any of those guys, but you four are my type of people.” You admitted, now only being fed water in order to attempt to not make you die.

Soap shot a smile at Ghost, who gave him a wink since his smile couldn’t be seen under the mask. Price looked over his three men sitting opposite him and Gaz, both of them moving so that you could be boxed in.

“Once again, while we have all of you here, cheers to another successful mission, gentlemen.” Price smiled, raising his glass. The rest of the task force respectfully doing the same.

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

Angela Well, now Pam and Cece are in the car and they call Jim. They call daddy. This is really cute. So sweet. 

Jenna But this is where Pam is going to find out that Jim is still in Philly and he's not going to make the recital. This investor might back out and Jim can't leave. 

Angela So Jim says Pam will you please film the recital. And he sort of starts talking to her, kind of condescending about how to film it. And she's like, look, I know how to point a rectangle at something and film it. 

Jenna And then he's like, okay. And then it's time to say goodbye. And then there's this pause, and then he's like, hey, Pam, you have to press end, you know, which is sort of meant to be like a dig at her phone skills. Lady... 

Angela Why can't Jim just hang up the phone? 

Jenna This is the scene. 

Angela Oh, that people were pissed off about? 

Jenna For so many reasons. I saw the mail for this episode, and I couldn't believe it. Where should I begin? I'll begin with Amanda C from Montreal, Canada. Amanda says, I have to go on a little rant about Jim, but maybe not from the moment you think. What absolutely grinds my gears about Jim's behavior is when Pam is on the phone with him in the car, and he implies that she doesn't know how to use her phone to video the recital by saying, See, Pam, you still need to hang up the phone. Excuse me, sir. She is driving. Can you not hang it up yourself? And then it will automatically end the call on her phone. Samantha L from Tampa, Florida said, The thing I actually cannot get past is the incident when Pam is in the car on the way to Cece's recital. Why is Jim giving Pam such a hard time for being bad with technology because she doesn't hang up the phone? Pam is driving with your child in the backseat. You hang up the phone, Jim! You're not the one that would need to take your hand off the wheel of a moving vehicle! Let's see. Samantha goes on to say, Who's the one who's really bad with the cell phone technology, huh? Spoiler alert, not Pam. Another letter from Nora E in New Orleans, Louisiana. I want to go on record to say that the tipping point moment when Jim has clearly gone full ass (BLEEP) is in this episode, when he's on the phone with me and he berates her for not hanging up the phone. She's driving. He's at work. He's clearly not in a huge rush to return to his meeting, since he's able to stay at his desk and what? Have a gotcha moment with his own wife? This scene in the car makes me so deeply angry. I need this full dickhead moment to be acknowledged. 

Angela I love that she puts full in front of her curse word. 

Jenna I know. 

Angela Full (BLEEP). I want to use that. He's gone full (BLEEP). 

Jenna I know. I know. So Ange, it's literally what you said. You said it. You're like, why can't he hang up the phone? This is just three of the letters we got about this moment. But this is very good foreshadowing for what is going to happen later, and I think an interesting dynamic in their relationship, which is that and I think some relationships have this. They've got the gotcha person. Oh, I got to point out the little thing. Gotcha. You know, you said that you are good at cleaning out the fridge, but- gotcha. Found a rotten tomato or whatever it is. You know, the gotcha people, the gotcha moments which are just, like, so toxic for a relationship. 

Angela It's petty. 

Jenna Pettiness. 

Angela It's pettiness. 

Jenna Yeah. But Jim's in a mood. He's stressed. He's not handling it well. In conclusion, I hope that us discussing it today on the podcast has brought some of you relief, because the number of heated letters we got about this moment, I felt it. 

Angela We also asked Kelly Cantley about directing this scene, and here's what she had to say. 

Kelly Cantley Cece in the car. Surprisingly, Cece in the car was really hard to shoot because Cece was a little girl and little kids don't do lines. So Jenna, I don't know if you remember, we shot all of your dialogue and then we shot lots of both of us taking turns just saying the lines. I think we started with you doing it. And then we wanted to go from you to the little girl so we would see you talking. So you did it a few times where you would just say her line and she would say it back. And I believe I did it a bunch of times on the speaker in the car. So I actually had forgotten that until I watched the episode again. 

Jenna actually did remember that. I had such a great rapport with those little girls. Not to toot my own horn, but I'm 50 now, which is the decade of tooting your own horn. 

Angela It's time to toot. 

Jenna Bailey and Sienna. I just loved them so much, and we would do a thing where we would do, like, repeat me. So I would say their line and they would say their line, and we made a little game out of it. They did great. 

Angela I thought it was so cute. Those girls were so cute. 

[naviculariis]

🔥🔥🔥 >:)

Aight let's go. My hot takes

Aka Kanon griping about the world building of one piece lmao

🔥: I know it has been said before and will be said again, TOEI's animation regarding the women in the show will forever piss me off. Because yes, Oda is also guilty of over sexualizing the women- but Toei makes it so much worse. Nami & Robin no longer have RIBS. It's insane, and it is genuinely what kept me from starting One Piece for decades. Bc I used to read the physical Shounen Jump magazines & I would just skip over OP bc of that. I write my ladies as having meat on their bones, muscles, etc- very different body types bc no one person is the same.

🔥: This will definitely be a hot take, but I don't think Oda was prepared to create such a giant world that he did. There are a lot of unanswered questions regarding certain islands, how the different Blues work, how TRADE WORKS considering it's so difficult to get through to the Grand Line, which you seemingly need to cross to get from the North Blue to the South Blue. This is something that happens to fantasy authors often, when their world they create is simply too big and has too many moving parts, things get lost ( like how we still don't actually have canon material regarding the history of the Kidd Pirates, or any real information regarding what happened to Penguin or Shachi's parents. OR KIDD'S. )

🔥: I'm a stickler for historical accuracy & the way Oda has meshed hundreds of years of Piracy together grinds my gears so ridiculously bad. Yes, it's a fantasy show, it doesn't have to make sense. Marines shouldn't be using SHOT GUNS. Flint locks would have been more commonly used. Gun powder. Hand crafted bullets. Lead bullets. Swan shots. BALL AND CHAIN SHOTS THAT WERE FIRED FROM CANONS & WOULD TAKE DOWN MASTS ON SHIPS. Shit like that was more common. Not a modern shotgun.

[vegalocity]

I dunno about mk brainblasting Li Jing into being a mindless “helper.“ yes, Li Jing isnt gikd, but the main reason he did that to the spiders was cuz they fought against him PERSOANLLY. (Also cuz spiders are ick yo him so y’know- bias.)

I feel like he would make Li Jing aware of being the “perfect parent”, and Li Jing seeing just how much… happier Nezha is while under. It could turn into another situation where he may go physically lucid, but ultimately decide to stay for Nezha. This proving that people can be “redeemed” through the oblivion in MK’s mind.

This could even feed into MK’s mindset, assuring him again and again that yes, this is what’s best.

Okay so- here's the thing-

Me and @unseelie-robynx aren't being all that purist on the show's canon, we feel like if the actual myths and stories tell a more interesting narrative we'll go with that

and one of those was the conflict between Li Jing and Nezha- in the actual stories there was a lot more hostility on either end than just 'distant dad and son trying to prove himself' there was mutual murder attempts in the MULTIPLE, you know?

and sometimes we don't agree with a direction the show takes, and find a more interesting story to alter it for us as we see fit, So our idea for how the Li Jing and Nezha situation goes is much more 'guys they literally tried to kill eachother multiple times before nezha was twelve Li Jing becoming the pagoda bearer and Nezha being TOLD to put away his vengance quest isn't gonna make things GOOD between them' (I mean i would absolutely say trying multiple times to kill your infant age child counts as making a toxic environment, right?)

We do that a few times, Tang Sanzang is a separate person entirely from Tang bc we thought that Tang not being a reincarnation and in fact just being Some Dude both made more sense on a worldbuilding level (its practically a joke in the discord server we first cooked this up in that Tang being a reincarnation of someone that shouldn't be reincarnating anymore is mythologically incoherent and it pisses both of us off to think about) and makes Tang's arc stronger anyway.

But for the way we specifically have settled on how we preferred their relationship it would make more sense for Xiaotian to have an axe to grind against His Buddy Nezha's shitty dad

especially since we have it with other characters, such as Shuyin (an oc we accidentally got too attached to and is now Xiaojiao's main love interest) whom he decided 'nah your parents suck we're gonna rehome you and do something humiliating to them so they can 'repent' they'll be happier you'll be happier i promise it'll all be better like this'

And by the time He'd have either Nezha or Li Jing in his claws on a more permanent basis he'd have gone FULL god complex and took on a more Azure-like 'nah the celestial court sucks' view he'd feel a lot more fine with fucking with people's full lives.

[kankuroplease]

hello! how would the uchiha brothers be as spouses?

You know I love Uchihas even when they irk me and I believe in the Uchiha deep love deal so 🥰

Disclaimer: I HC they’re all possessive lovers/Doberman bfs (tsk), it’s just a matter of the degree a lover can handle

Madara

Firstly, Finest of the founders era spouses and you can’t convince me otherwise

He’s mean, but he also means well. So they can’t be too mad, right?

Well they can but that’s not going to phase him much

He enjoys fighting and is rather intelligent, so it wouldn’t be in their best interest to pick a fight if they can’t actually debate him with proper arguments and valid points

BUT if they’re he is spouse, they’ve clearly have earned his trust and respect in some regard

So he will at least listen to them. Even if he doesn’t agree, he’ll take it into consideration probably won’t tell you that tho cause again, meanie

His spouse wouldn’t have to worry about him getting hurt too often, it’s Madara. They’ll have to worry about who he hurt

Likes when his spouse walks around town confidently like they own everything. That’s hot asf to him

I’m convinced he has a softer side that’s so warm one could spontaneously burst from it

Pulling them in close to lay their head on his chest while making small circles with his finger on their back or shoulder

Coming up and kissing their shoulder when they’re concentrating on their own work to pester them about what they’re doing for telling them to hurry up

It’s time to train

Which is Madara’s version of saying he wants their attention

HE TAKES HIS GLOVES OFF TO HOLD HANDS sometimes

He’s not overly concerned about PDA but he prefers to keep most intimacy within the house

Loves couples bathing and will turn their solo bath into one

If someone offended them, he wants names. Now

If they set a date, he’ll always be there no matter how busy his schedule may have been

Very random; but he’s the most likely brother to prank his spouse

Inari

Very supportive of his spouse’s ambitions

He’s not the husband that will drill them about where they’re going and who will be there

He’ll just tell them to have fun and don’t get into too much trouble

He craves quality time with his spouse and would be very happy if they joined him in collecting herbs and grinding medicines

He is a bit of a romantic, so fresh wild flowers weekly while they’re in season and confections for them to know he appreciates them

Makes them tea whenever they’ve had a stressful day and ask if they want to talk about it

Loves when they’ve read something from his personal library so they can talk about it

Falls in love all over again whenever they hug or kiss him for no particular reason

Lightly brags about his spouse to his patients and brothers

Enjoys leaving love bites for the same reason

Kota

So excited to be a husband, but if they ask him what he’s smiling about he’s going to get embarrassed

Looks forward to being able to cuddle them nightly

Will get a little moody by that i mean he’s insufferable with others if his partner is touched out and he hasn’t had them

He’ll make them little wood carvings while out on missions of the different animals he’s seen

Secretly wants to do all the cliché couples things including festivals, moon viewing, and cherry blossom parties

He’s going to lay his head on their lap whenever he’s wanting to be spoiled or just doesn’t want them to leave

He’s also a bit of a neat freak and cleanly, so they will rarely have to clean up after him and he’ll clean their messes too

Which isn’t a problem unless he feels they’re intentionally doing it to piss him off

Once they’re his, his jealous nature subsides a bit, but it will pop up back up when someone tries to be overly sweet with his spouse

He’s got a lot of emotional maturing to do. So his spouse will have to give him some grace and also put him in his place when he steps out of line

He’ll try to argue back, but he’ll ultimately apologize

Then awkwardly try to make it up to them

It’s not the smoothest sailing relationship, but they’re as important to him as his brothers if not more

So he’ll always try to be better for them

Tenko

They have him wrapped around their little finger completely

The type to wake up and admire his spouses face in pure bliss

He’s can’t get enough of them and will either wake them up with too many kisses or from messing with their hair

Absolute trash in the kitchen, doesn’t stop him from trying to make them food

Will gorge out on any food they make for family get togethers because he doesn’t want to share it

They can have his cooking

He’ll never raise his voice in anger towards them about anything

Beg him for anything and he’s folding. Immediately.

Will take them dancing in the moonlight

If they’re having a bad day, he’ll do anything to make them smile

Loves doing their hair. Doesn’t matter how short or long it is, he’ll insist on helping them wash it

They (and the whole village) will know he’s back from a mission because they will hear him cheerfully shouting their name/petname

He’s a little baby crazed/eager to start a family so he’s going to talk about how cute babies and little kids are

Adoption or his own, he doesn’t care. He just wants to start their family sometime soon

Izuna

He’s still a dick, but he’s their dick. So it’s okay 😌

He’s the most possessive. Like will literally grab their waist and pull them closer if someone so much as pets their eyes linger on his spouse too long

Might ignore them if they entertained someone he doesn’t like, or he’ll start a fight

You just never know with him

unlike his brothers, he doesn’t like his spouse showing themselves off. It makes him SICK when he sees the wistful eyes of others looking at HIS partner

On the brighter side, he’s happiest when he’s needed. So if his spouse gives him task, he’s going to be smug about it on the outside and mentally doing cartwheels

He needs quality time with his spouse, so he seeks out their company as much as possible

Which can come off as clingy

And he is

But they’re his spouse. They should want to be around him

Wipes down their seat for them without fail everytime

He’s also going to kiss their sleeping forehead every morning when he’s ready to leave

He’s the type to them you have a good day and if they respond with an “I’ll try.” He’ll respond with “you will have a good day.”

Tries to keep his composer at all times, but a little praise and a few neck kisses later and he’s melting

[truearchangel]

♡ (see this is what happens when Alastor thinks someone is amusing)

OPINIONS MEME. I am unsure if we're sticking this in the same universe with (rradiio) or if were keeping this a seperate universe?

There is extreme doubt and irritation etched on his face at seeing the Radio Demon again. Only to then have a piece of paper slid across the table he's using. Flicking his gaze between Alastor and the paper he finally reluctantly pulls it a little bit close.

"What is this and what do you want from me now? Finally take me up on my suggestion of making applications--" well, it looks like an application, but not the one he was anticipating reviewing. "Seriously? You want my opinion on you?" Very well, Michael is nothing if not honest and blunt in his critiques of other people. Sighing he grabbed the red marking he was using and started filling it out while commenting.

The first thing that popped up was attraction and he drew a sharp single line through it. "I am not rating my brother's significant other in attraction. I'd tell you to go to Hell but you're already here." Moving on from that he lowered his gaze to the next question listed.

"Affection." Well, for .2 seconds (let's admit it was longer than that) he had geniunely enjoyed talking with the Radio Demon. He was clever, as much as that thought pissed Michael off, and he was actually helping him with these questions he's started heaving. He wasn't a bad conversationalist when he toned back the more insane and aggravating parts of his personality. Damn, he can't rate this zero, can he? Sighing he reluctantly colored in the circles.

●●○○○ | AFFECTION

"No, I am not answering questions on that, and I want you to know I will still stab you with my holy sword." Two out of five was not that grand, he wants that understood. Shifting in the chair he looked to the next one.

Interest. Grinding his teeth together sharply he shook his head and filled out the circles on that too.

●●●○○ | INTEREST

"I don't believe I need to inflate your ego more than it already is with explaining this one." Raising his gaze up to the Radio Demon he narrowed his eyes at him. "You are intelligent, and when you want to be, you're clever in ways that are not wholly related to manipulation. The other things wrong with you definitely lower the bar though. And you have a lot wrong with you." To some level Alastor has to be self-aware enough to know that himself though. Satisifed he didn't inflate the demon's ego to much, he turned back to the questionair.

Loyalty.

Ha!

He drew a sharp line through that.

○○○○○ | LOYALTY

The last one was trust which, truthfully, could mean many things. Trust was not a simple word, it depending on what it was directed toward. To be honest, Michael would be stupid to trust this demon further than he can throw him. Considering how slippery he seemed to be, Michael doubted he'd even get his hands on him. So, in general, of course he didn't trust him.

●○○○○ | TRUST

"Your explaination is a simple one. I trust that you're not intentionally misusing my brother or his daughter. Regardless of what Lucifer believes himself, I still care about him. I won't annoying you with petty family drama, it's just the answer you're getting. Take it and do with it whatever you wish." Picking the paper up he thrust it at the Radio Demon and dropped his hands back down onto the desk to continue his notes of the Hazbin Hotel.

"Now go away."

[khruschevshoe]

OFMD Critique: the Handling of Female Characters, "Girlbosses," and Dropped Polyamory in Season 2 (aka Why the HELL did you give Zheng Yi Sao that ending?)

For this one, I kind of just want to gesture at the ending of 2x7 and the entirety of 2x8 and scream at the top of my lungs, "What the FUCK was that SHIT?"

But I already did that when the finale itself came out, so instead I'm going to stay calm and give a genuine critique (though still as rambly as always).

The handling of this show's women is...questionable. I think the only woman that was handled 100% well is Mary in Season 1. No real notes there. I love her and how her storyline is written to bits.

But in season 2, all 3 major women characters (Archie, Zheng Yi Sao, and Spanish Jackie) have their storylines hamstrung by romantic plot lines.

In Archie's case, the romance plot works. Not every character needs to have a subplot. The bits that flesh out her character are well integrated into the story, whether that be her first kiss with Jim directly leading into the fighting to the death plotline/Jim finally standing up to Blackbeard or the lines "you have hope, it's cute," "this is just kinda how things work," and "they just kind of get away with it, you know" (though it still pisses me off that that last one goes unchallenged in the narrative) being used for plot progression, or are fun character details, such as all of the snake cult hints. (Do I wish that the poly aspect of her, Jim, and Olu's dynamic was better executed so that I didn't feel like the tealoranges plot was yanked out from under my feet? Yes. Of course.)

But as for Zheng Yi Sao?

The treatment of this character makes my blood boil.

See, I'm not opposed to her having a romantic plotline. In fact, I think it could have been fun. A woman can have romance and power. 2x7 even looked like it was building to that sort of conclusion, with Jim, Olu, and Archie joining her crew in one of the very few actual canon implications of poly (though no confirmation, sadly- have y'all seen the info about the deleted scenes that could have confirmed it? I can't believe so much ended up on the cutting room floor.) But then the end of 2x7 strips all power from Zheng Yi Sao.

The show pulled one of the most powerful pirates and most accomplished women in history (also a woman of color, btw, a fact which only doubles the weird fucking undertones of her treatment as a character) into the show only to strip her of her power, shove her into a romantic plot line on a ship where she isn't even a captain, and expected me not to pick up on ANY of the fucked up optics of the writing? The fact that we end the season with Zheng and Spanish Jackie both losing their power as pirate queens in exchange for setting them on a ship with only one singular boyfriend grinds my fucking gears, man.

There are ways to give Zheng a romantic plotline without it making her an idiot (ala what happens with Olu in 2x3) or making her lose all of her power (ala the finale). Jackie's case is less infuriating, but it does remind me of the fact that a lot of the casual poly/open relationship rep from the first season got stripped from the second season (and before you come at me with the Zheng/Olu/Archie/Jim storyline, look me in the eye and cite to me any concrete canon evidence we have of it. I ADORE the fanfic as much as the next person, but I mourn the lost potential every day. Check my previous tealoranges meta for that- I might write a long version of it sometime). Lucius and Pete lost all their open relationship implications and Jackie's husbands are dropped from the finale in favor of her running off with the only one who gets a name.

I understand that they probably wrote Zheng Yi Sao this way to show Stede's growth as a Captain by showing that he brings more flexible ideas to the table (which, by the way, is completely undermined by the fact that his plan actively kills Izzy in the process), but they really should have thought through the...everything in regards to the implications of writing Zheng Yi Sao this way. Because if you bring in one of the only female characters with speaking lines onto this show, a Chinese woman at that, make romance actively make her stupid, have her be fooled by a white man (who, by the way, kills THOUSANDS of unnamed women off-page in explosions and it's just kind of treated as a plot point for the whole Zheng/Auntie/Stede/Izzy/Ed comparison which gives me the ick), strip her of her fleet and her power, and then have the GALL to not even make her the Captain of the Revenge at the end of it all? I'm not sure I trust you to handle her legacy, much less write women in general.

TLDR; Writing a very queer show does not resolve you of sexism.

[batsplat]

I think this should be a fun one for you: rank 00’s-early 2010’s spanish atp tennis players from most beloved/underrated/least beloathed to your most behated.

I love when you’re mean about atp 🥰

incredible hater ask. love to see that me just endlessly lobbing potshots at male tennis players has finally found an audience. the inclusion criteria for this list is extremely vibes-based - they need to have had some of their career-best results in the 00's or early 2010s and I can't primarily associated them with 90's or 2020's. so no moya or alcaraz... rba marginal inclusion but not pcb. (ramos vinolas would've come top but he just... didn't really get going until late 2010s.) cut-off is top twenty peak ranking. so let's go

MOST BELOVED/UNDERRATED/LEAST BELOATHED

bautista agut: horse girl!! horse girl!!! a bit of a journey of how I learned to stop worrying and love the pusher. I've occasionally had a slightly troubled history with the guy, not least because sometimes it does feel like he crawls out of the woodwork literally just to piss me off? like, I'm sorry, check out this string of results from last year (I've conveniently highlighted the irritating result)

first time since JANUARY he'd strung together back-to-back match wins. feels a little personal!!

beyond spawning out of nowhere to hand medvedev a yearly defeat, he has also been done a fair bit of torturing of murray. that 2022 match at doha with the foul scoreline... that being said, if you're a fan of a high-ranked player it is extremely poor form to be too annoyed by this kind of thing. medvedev should maybe consider stop losing to inferior pushers and even at the time I did find it pretty funny, rolled my eyes but fundamentally idc that much about how he does in halle. and I am obviously a big supporter of pushing... rba is quite an un-spanish players in some ways - doesn't play with a lot of spin, not bad at clay but it's not where he shines. idk I'm a big fan of pushers, rba has been a stalwart representative of the pushing lifestyle on the atp tour, he's kind of in that gilles simon camp where I was always happy enough to put on a match with them in it. and y'know, he seems like a nice enough guy. a fixture of the atp tour who I'm just kinda fond of

ferrer: always felt kinda sorry for him. destined to be #2 spaniard forevermore. thing is, with his game, you do have to say he didn't massively underachieve - like in a way a slam final is a pretty impressive showing. he's not one of the players TO ME where it feels super painful they never won a slam, even though arguably he's had a better career than some of the guys I'd put in that camp. funny how that works out!! I actually quite like ferrer's game, it's very bread and butter, spanish clay court style... and y'know, I grew up on clay, it's probably still my favourite surface all things considered, and we did always joke about the grinding from ten metres behind the baseline thing. I respect it. gets annoying when someone is nadal-levels good, but ferrer is very much not that so I quite enjoyed watching him play. idk, I did always vaguely like those second tier players during the big four era - childhood nostalgia of watching them in a bunch of slam matches without my negative feelings towards the big three. he's not my favourite of those, but he's all right. just quite inoffensive really

costa: oh man, I just don't really have any particularly strong feelings towards this guy. I think it's pretty funny how he won a slam and does just reflect where the clay game was at for a few years before nadal, like none of the post kuerten pre nadal rg winners were particularly serious characters. still, beating ferrero in that 2002 final is something I will gladly applaud, especially absolutely walloping him in the first two sets. this is very firmly before my time and perhaps a year or so before I even held my first tennis racquet as a kid, and while I obviously have quite a few past players I have strong feelings about... costa is not one of them. he is not actively offensive to me, let's put it that way (which I retroactively realised I'd put for two players in a row, but I'll leave it because it's funny that this is how I classify spanish players)

verdasco: now, look. verdasco doesn't hate nadal, but I am more than happy to do so on his behalf. I wasn't a sentient enough person yet in 2009 to have particularly sophisticated takes on the tragic inevitability of sports narratives, but if I HAD been I think I would've gone insane at some point during That Australian Open Match. basically redlined for hours and it still wasn't enough, never reached another slam semi, just kinda sucks man. (not that it matters but I'm glad he did at least manage to beat nadal in five at ao 2016 in the first round, just for the vibes.) I do also have a fair bit of sympathy for him over the two month doping ban he got in 2022 for failing to renew the therapeutic exemption thingy he had for his adhd medication - that was just so obviously a case of someone not really doping and tbh a lot of people (including some players!!) were pretty cruel about that shit

all that being said, can't say I've ever particularly been a fan. idk he was just one of those vaguely frustrating players to me who theoretically had a lot to their game but never was quite... on it enough. I do like some players who build their games around big booming forehands, but it's not really what I've ever gravitated towards. I think we have now reached the part of the list where most of these guys get a bit of a nadal tax. as in, I've seen them pal around with nadal, it has been forced in front of my eyeballs, and I simply do not support that kind of behaviour. (true of ferrer too but he has just about enough accumulated good will to be ranked higher up.) it's nothing personal, it's just that they're associated with nadal in my mind. I don't like it

robredo: is it bad if I say I got him confused with verdasco as a kid. too many spaniards. well, first off, go watch the valencia 2014 final against murray (I got a kia ad for nadal when I tried to open this video which ramped up my internal haterism for what is to come). what people sometimes forget about this horrifically painful final is that it was the second time in like?? a few weeks?? where he was playing murray in a final... I think he blew five matchpoints in both which. ouch. anyway the point is that valencia match is great - and unlike when the big three inflict horrendously painful defeats on their opponents, this was good and moral and fun. robredo was probably the most... invisible of this lot, if that's not too mean. his biggest contribution to tennis history is defeating federer once and only once at the 2013 us open, ensuring that federer and nadal wouldn't play - which ensured they never played at the us open which means it is an incomplete and quite frankly fraudulent rivalry. they missed out by one match on six occasions. the list of players who stopped them reads murray, djokovic, del potro and.... robredo. a hero tbh

other robredo thoughts... I mean, he was a bit top twenty filler if we're being honest. the thing where he won three consecutive slam matches from two sets to love down was pretty neat. he's basically ferrer but worse. I rank him at basically the same level as verdasco but I remember more verdasco matches than robredo so. there we are

ferrero: okay. look. I'm aware some of this might be coloured by my extreme irritation at his presence in alcaraz's coaching box these last few years. man will simply not shut up. I can't help it - sometimes this stuff colours my opinions on someone

(not a player but the swiftest downfall in this regard has been darren cahill, who had a base fondness for as 'notable agassi coach' that he's steadily pissed away in this sinner partnership. zero respect for how he dumped anisimova so soon after she hired him because he just couldn't handle the strains of travel, throwing himself a pity party... before almost immediately linking up with sinner. a tangent irrelevant to this post but I just needed to get that in there!!)

I get that coaching's legal now!! and I am NOT a conspiracy theorist about the timing of that change happening right during the golden boy's rise to the top, but!! it's still obviously been pretty convenient, like surely the umpires could not have ignored that for all that much longer lol. and I hate the rule change, idc how little practical use it is - it's antithetical to the spirit of tennis. I know coaching happened before then too but it makes a difference if you have to at least be sly about it (not that this guy ever really was). also beyond my principled opposition, he's just annoying. it's annoying. I'm sick of his face by now. get him off my screen

but to rewind twenty years, it's still aggravating that his one and only slam came at the cost of what would have been one of the all-time great slam fairy tale runs. it should have been verkerk!! ik that it wasn't even particularly close, I don't care. verkerk also just had a more compelling run to the final - sure jcf beat defending champion costa but he wasn't in particular good form, and verkerk took out both moya and coria. some random dutch bloke took out former champion moya in five sets... should have gotten the title. I'm sure you'll be delighted to know the match is indeed on youtube. isn't this cool:

don't you want to root for this guy!!

anyway yeah idk you're a top player for years you win one slam and THAT is how you won it? by stomping on a fairy tale? the counter-argument is that jcf SHOULD have won in 2002 but, well. just an awful performance wasn't it. like I know I said I like grinders and chokers but the first two sets of the first slam final you compete in being 1-6 0-6... hm. idk man. just don't think he was a good enough player to have earned a slam or indeed to have been number one, and in that case I would prefer the fairy tale slam. I will say he was an underrated hard court player, but yeah just didn't like his playstyle. a lot of these spaniards are way too big on their forehands. and I cannot forgive his role in blighting the game with another spanish prodigy. we're just never going to be free

lopez: okay, look, admittedly the fact that he seemed so close to nadal didn't make me particularly keen on him, but it's more than that!! another one where his activities post-retirement have hardly done much to endear him to me. I do unironically loathe this guy for his work running the madrid open, I think he's an incompetent sexist cunt who needs to be kept far away from women's tennis as possible. these last couple of years have made me more and more furious about the current situation with women's tennis - the game is in an excellent place but it might as well be being sabotaged by the people who are supposed to promote it. it's disgraceful he is still even in the job after the women's doubles finalists were prevented from speaking during the trophy ceremony, and it's as good a demonstration as you're going to get of the wta's luck of power. just makes me sad man

also, I never liked him as a player. idk man hating's not rational but I'm trying to come up with something I feel like I can defend a bit more than 'I was sick of people talking about how attractive this guy was to women'. but well, I was! oh wow, he's a heartthrob?? you think he's good-looking?? you want to make a joke about how he makes the ladies swoon?? original! never heard it before! look, I support straight women in their lifestyle choices even if they differ from my own, but more than anything else I just find this shit cringe. 'deliciano' is cringe. calling a bloke vain can be a pretty charged insult, but in this case I stand by it - shallow man with shallow tennis. just this gross macho energy that I personally have always found off-putting. he's also a commentators' pet where they want him to unlock his inner potential and become the player he could be with all that talent inside of him... literally shut up

nadal: if nadal has a million haters, I am one of them. if nadal has five haters, I am one of them. if nadal has one hater, that is me. if nadal has no haters, then I am no longer alive. if the word supports nadal then I am against the world

I ended up writing paragraphs and paragraphs worth of why I hate him for One Match Specifically but then I realised that wasn't really part of the remit for a jokey hater post and was also getting a wee bit TOO earnest and emotional. it has been cut out but lmk if you want to read an extended scream into the abyss I suppose lol

anyway! my number one enemy. djokovic might be the worst of the big three on moral grounds, federer's whole aesthetic and vibe is horrendous, but as an actual tennis player? oh, nadal, they could never make me like you. instinctively the least appealing playstyle... I love watching djokovic move around the court, even I can appreciate clean federer hitting. nadal is just... well, look, I'm not a forehand girl. and when I AM a forehand girl, I tend to like mine a bit flatter. penetrating. I can appreciate nadal's forehand is a great shot, but it doesn't really do much for me. all the good and appealing parts of nadal's game... low key are better from djokovic. the athleticism, the counterpunching, high margin game etc. if I want this stuff, I go to djokovic. also, look, I don't like the grunting - but what I really don't like is how completely accepted it is to hound wta players for grunting while nobody bats an eyelid when nadal sounds like a flock of seagulls is dying in his throat every single point. and I get that the double standards aren't exactly his fault, but you know what is his fault? his repeated and consistent opposition to equal pay in tennis! admittedly women's rights aren't exactly an issue you want to interrogate too closely with any of the big three, see the utter cowardice and moral void surrounding the zverev case

which I think gets to the part that really pisses me off about nadal. it's just... the hypocrisy. his pr is all about being this big fighter, big fighter, big fighter, he's so tough, he never gives up, what a fighter. such a big song and dance is done about what a great sportsman he is, him and federer obviously - how respectful they are, how civil and composed and isn't it great that we have two such great role models for the sport. people won't stop banging on about the fucking racquet smashing thing, as if we have to declare sainthood because a multi-millionaire tax evader has decided not to break a stick that clocks in at maybe a hundred fifty quid retail price. I'm biased in that I like racquet smashes, I think they're funny, they're ultimately not that serious - I don't particularly mind giving them a code violation but I do think it's remarkable that breaking a racquet isn't allowed but smashing up your own body with a racquet is. which is a separate issue! point being, it's one of those things that get used to paint nadal as the fairest most respectful most humblest bestest sportsman of all time. but he's not!! of course he engages in gamesmanship, of course he did some blatant time violations every time he could get away with it, of course he loved disrupting the rhythm of the other player serving, of course some of his medical timeouts were awfully convenient. of course it's pretty rich of him to complain about other blokes grunting

which I literally would not mind - I am a justine henin fan - if it weren't ignored due to this guy's insane pr. I also think it is awfully like tennis, in all its hypocrisy and fundamental conservatism, to judge someone's moral character over the number of racquets they have smashed - rather than literally anything else. this OBVIOUSLY isn't his fault, but I find the way many of his fans glorify the abuse his uncle subjected him to as a child beyond distasteful. federer fans are the cockiest and at times most fanatical (though For Some Reason they've quietened down these past few years), djokovic fans are the most flat out insane, but I find something about the conservatism of the nadal fanbase particularly pernicious. all in on the macho culture, endless wanking off to his masculinity and traditional values and whatever other bullshit

and to bring it back around - he's also fucking boring lol. like at the end of the day all this stuff just eats away at his appeal for me. so committed to never saying anything controversial he never says anything at all. I've already expressed this opinion before on this blog, but I firmly believe if you are an athlete that good and that dominant then you NEED to have more going for you. you need more character, more narrative juice, more interesting interpersonal relationships with your fellow competitors. tbh I think it's probably quite hard to keep me invested if you're THAT dominant, but let's be honest - men's tennis hasn't even been trying since agassi and sampras retired (rip to my men's tennis goats). serena on the women's side is way less annoying because she faced a changing cast of characters throughout her career, everyone in noughties wta had crazy narrative juice, and she is also exponentially more interesting than the big three combined. she really WAS an asshole at times, and I mean that in the most complimentary way possible!! all the gamesmanship people use to insult her honestly just makes me like her more. people complain about the chaos at the top of the wta tour but like... first of all, obviously we've left that era, and secondly I'd take that any day over stagnation at the top of the men's. the big three for all their incredible tennis have stifled the men's game, nadal's the worst of them, glad he's retired

MOST BEHATED

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Imagine bi4bi Hellcheer being together, but having an open relationship in the beginning to explore their sexuality. That would be neat. Like them going to a club and being each other's wing person. They're young, they're having a good time but they're also being safe. They don't necessarily have sex. Sometimes, they just dance with other people and make out a little. It freaked Robin and Steve when they brought them out to the club, and Eddie started kissing another guy. Chrissy had giggled.

"Oh, did we not tell you we have an open relationship?" Chrissy asked.

"No!"

"We do. We're having fun," Chrissy said with a shrug.

Robin told her that fun was something she was also looking for, Vickie needed some time after breaking up with her boyfriend. It was something they had both deserved, and Vickie hadn't wanted to jump right into another relationship, but she did like Robin. Robin had totally understood. They were young and survived the end of the world. Robin wanted some fun, too. Not too much, though. They watched Eddie practically grind on the guy he was dancing with, Chrissy and Steve being the only two to find it hot.

"I really didn't know that Eddie was into guys," Steve said.

"It's a recent discovery," Eddie said, coming back to the table.

"Did you have fun?" Chrissy asked as Eddie kissed her.

"Oh, I made someone very happy. He wanted to use me to make some other guy jealous, and I was happy to oblige," Eddie said, wiggling his eyebrows.

"You want to tell Steve and Robin what made you realize that you're bisexual?" Chrissy asked with a teasing grin.

Eddie groaned and hid his face into her hair. He was mumbling, and she giggled. He scowled mockingly at her as he straightened himself up.

"Fine. It was you, Steve, okay? It's your fault, though. You just had to rip your sweater off on that damn boat and throw it at me like a damn slut. I didn't think about when I threw my vest at you to cover up your tits but you looked even hotter with your vest on and fuck, that pissed me off. I mean, you're covered in grime and blood. How the hell do you still look hot?" Eddie rambled on.

"I could make it up to you," Steve said, leaning against the table. "We could have some fun of our own."

Steve drained his cup, slammed it down, and wiggled his fingers at Eddie. The metalhead grinned and took his hand, letting Steve drag him into the dance floor. Chrissy watched for a moment before turning to Robin.

"You want to have some fun?" Chrissy asked, and Robin nearly choked on her drink.

"Yeah, sure! You should know that I'm not graceful at all, and I was actually compared to a giraffe once. Which was hurtful but to be fair I did call Steve a moose first," Robin said.

"I love your friendship," Chrissy giggled.

"It has its perks," Robin replied.

Chrissy guided Robin's hips as they moved to the music. Robin was predictably awkward, but once she relaxed, Robin really got into it. She even kissed Chrissy first. By the time the four of them got back to the table, everyone's close were ruffeled, their hair a mess, and their lips were very swollen. They ordered more non alcoholic drinks and collapsed in their chairs.

"When we get back to Steve’s place, I'm totally fucking him," Eddie said.

"Okay, that sounds fun," Chrissy said and turned to Robin. "Do you want to fuck me tonight, Robin?"

"Uh, well, is it okay if I said I wasn't ready yet?" Robin asked.

"Of course it is. It's your choice, Robin," Chrissy said, kissing her and smiling sweetly. "I totally get it. When we get there, we can just make out and cuddle if you want to."

"That sounds nice," Robin said, blushing.

When they got back to Steve’s they did just that. Although, for Robin's sake, Chrissy moved them down to the basement as Eddie and Steve were very loud. There's no magical solution on how to deal with trauma. A lot of times, there's no solution at all. The only thing you can do is live your life. Sometimes you just got to dance, drink, or fuck it out. Sometimes, you happen to do it with your closest friends.

[crimmson]

i'm about to vaguepost about playing helldivers 2 because i'm feeling zesty. I have cramps and no patience.

I play helldivers 2 for fun. do not have the audacity to metagame at me while also being the single biggest source of teamkills every time I play with them.

and this isn't specific to them because i love y'all but a solid 75 percent of my helldivers 2 friends do this, but the person I'm mad at also does this, see previous statement about teamkills:

say words when you are throwing your fucking stratagems perhaps?? perhaps say you are throwing a giant nuclear bomb of death near us so we have time to make an attempt to get clear?? like yes silly accidents happen, that's part of what makes helldivers 2 so fun. I laugh my ass off when shit goes sideways. yes, it is genuinely funny when your teammate gets ragdolled and drops their Big Explosion Button right on the team, and I cannot emphasize enough how much I am not being sarcastic. it is genuinely the funniest shit.

but that is completely different from what I'm talking about. I need people to stop shutting down all your fucking lines of communication and going silent every time a fight gets hectic. SAY WORDS. PLEASE. I can at least work with SOMETHING better than I can work with NOTHING. like literally even just making weird noises works because i literally have learned what those noises mean and honestly it's great shorthand. and even something simple like "danger close" is great. but I cannot fucking interpret dead silence.

also open your fucking ears sometimes maybe. I have to assume this is connected to going silent when you're focusing. but nothing pisses me off more than me saying I'm gonna go take out an enemy structure, I have the equipment, I get all the fucking way there, and then they just fucking show up and do it instead. like oh. Okay. so nobody was listening to me at all actually, or did not care. i'm giving fucking status updates the entire time, and half that time I'm being ignored. and i guess it only bothers me because i'm always fucking listening and absorbing everything as everyone is running around and giving their own status updates. Even while i'm fighting for my fucking life in some trench. so i just cannot fathom why it's that hard for other people to fucking listen to me. i'm not saying that's right or fair on my part, but it's happening.

realistically I can forgive a lot of the above when it's literally anyone else except this one person, because I know my other friends' playstyles and personalities so I can adapt pretty well, and everything else just sort of makes up for it, and I don't mind it. But with this one person I lose my fucking mind and i just sit there grinding my teeth because it's also compounded with 500 other things that has nothing to do with the game but I am just always at like 50% Annoyance Capacity with them by default.

i think a good tldr is this game is really great and showing who works well under pressure and who doesn't, and jesus christ some of my friends are really really bad under pressure. and i know this and i love them. and then there are the people who are not my friends, and I cannot forgive them for this.

christ anyway I just don't mesh particularly well with this one person's playstyle but they always fucking show up and I can never seem to play with any of the people I want to play with, WITHOUT that one person. and i'm trying not to be a huge bitch about it but jesus christ i fucking miss playing with some of the other people and other group comps. but I have to be nice and fucking tiptoe around for reasons.

[thenightling]

On a magical group I belong to someone shared an "Ancient Spell to banish a ghost to oblivion."

I won't share the spell. But there are MANY things wrong with it. Many, many, many things.

1. "Banish a ghost to oblivion."

First, let's examine this statement. Unless you are talking about a residual haunting (See: Stone Tape Theory) you are talking about a an Earth bound non-human spirit that had never been alive, or a disembodied human soul.

Let's presume they are talking about a human soul. Okay, keep that in mind. Now we have "Banish to oblivion." Banish... sure, fine. But Oblivion... Oblivion isn't a nether world or afterlife.

It's not a floaty void like in a cartoon. It's not limbo. It's not the astral plane.

It's a term to mean "nonexistence." to cease to be.

This isn't some edgy comic book. There is no legitimate spell in most Neo-Pagan or Occult practice that can destroy a human soul.

It doesn't just violate most forms of magical practice, it also violates the law of conservation in thermodynamics. "Energy cannot be destroyed. Only changed or transferred."

2. The spell begins with grinding pomegranate seeds into a fine paste, which in and of itself, indicates to me the person has never eaten or even seen a pomegranate. Hint: the seeds aren't actually seeds. Another term is "Jewels" and they are really the only edible part of the fruit. They are filled with a tasty red juice. You can't turn it into a Fine paste, you'd get a puddle of pomegranate juice first.

Simply rendering the seeds into powder takes a lot of work. It can be done but it takes a lot of work.

3. Pomegranate seeds are sacred to the Greek Goddess Persephone and her husband, Hades, God of The Dead. You would likely offend them with the notion that you can invoke them to destroy a human soul for you, not even to take that soul into their domain but "oblivion."

The spell requires applying a number of ingredients to the skeletal remains of the person haunting you so there's grave desecration and the first ingredient is a direct sacrilege to The Goddess of the Dead.

Yeah... No.

This is why you shouldn't trust spells you find online. This feels almost like a booby trap to get you to piss off very powerful Greek deities. Have fun with that.