#the themes go so strong I will be dissapointed if that's not what happens

[iambecomeafangirl]

Watching Midnight Mass ep 02.

The priest is a vampire right? And he can make miracles after drinking human blood.

[angloie]

Beach Trips and I'm Falling in Love 1/2

When Annabeth meets a strange boy on vacation, she doesn't expect for their relationship to grow much. He's... terribly sarcastic. Cocky. A not-so great match for her witty self. But after learning he visits the same beach every year she does, their strange friendship blooms into something more.

Their realtionship isn't the only thing that blooms over the yearsー that meaning a certain raven-haired boy.

genre ; childhood friends to lovers, fluff, strangers(?) to lovers, exchanging letters au, percabeth mortal au, 6.5k words.

warnings ; swearing, suggestive(?) themes.

Annabeth first falls in love with the beach at age seven during a vacation.

The airport was a little scary truth be told; new people and big security dogs. Though, the dogs are the things she likes most of the whole expirience. The plane there was much, much worseー she had never liked being so high up for so long. That's why Annabeth slept for most of it. (more like passed out.)

But now that she's woken up in a whole new setting, (that being her parent's cabin) her heart beats fastly with excitement. The unfamiliar aroma of saltwater and sand wafts into the bedroom, making her sniff deepy. The patched quilt that once layed on her is tossed to the wooden planked floors. Everything here is unfamiliar, whether it's the bedroom or the whole place itself.

Annabeth kicks her feet off the bed, rushing to the hallway. She practically bounces off the walls like a rubber ball. New, sights, new place, new people... She'll get the hang of it sooner or later.

Annabeth skids to a halt. "Can I go out?" She asks excitedly to the emptiness of the cabin, her voice echoing off the sparsely decorated walls. There's a pause. Then:

A voice pipes from somewhereー maybe the kitchen? "I dunno about that honey, we just-" Dad!

"Please! Just for a while!" Annabeth cuts him off and begs.

She can hear a sigh emit from him "Well, arlright..." There's a pause; most likely Helen shaking her head and laughing lightly. "But don't go too far! We don't know this place that well."

"Thank you!"

It only takes a second before Annabeth is already sliding her sandals on when she gets the ok to go, grabbing her sand castle building bucket and lathering on her sunscreen.

She beams brightly.

A vast blue sky, yellow sun, and glimmering sand. It's all so beautiful. Gorgeous. Alluring- though the seven year old doesn't quite understand what the new word means. She dashes somewhere, anywhere, excited to go see more. Meet more people! Collect sea shells! And it's fun. Fun with peeking under shells looking for crabs, getting her shorts wet from the water, getting tanned in the beating sun.

Annabeth loses track of time at one point or another. All she knows that the collection of shells in her bright red bucket are just so pretty, so why not collect some more?

'Don't go too far,' She can clearly recall her father's voice, 'We don't know this place all that well.'

That was maybe... three hours ago.

Now, the sun isn't hung that high in the sky. It's starting to dip beneath the ocean, red and orange staining the sky. The pale moon isn't visibleー but Annabeth knows that it might come out sooner or later.

Just a few more shells, she thinks, touge sticking from her lips as she struggles to carry the full bucket, Until I go back.

Where is 'back', anyways?

Annabeth doesn't know where she is right now. At all. Save for the patch of palm trees she had rested under for a while, far behind her.

Oh well. Right now, she tries to focus on collecting more shells. Now, where did that blue shell-

"Uh... What're you doing?"

The question comes as a shock to her, making Annabeth jolt slightly. She whips around.

To her left, there's, well... the ocean. To her right: A cluster of palm tress nestled in the sand. She does a full turn. Than another.

"What-" Annabeth starts in confusion, "Who's there?"

"Up here," The voice (slightly extageratted she might add) chides. It comes straight from the-

-The palm trees?

She comes face to face with blinking sea green eyes. Raven hair splays across the kids' forehead, hiding the tips of his eyes. The kids' legs swinging back and forth on one of the branches, palm leaves shaking slightly with him. Annabeth blinks owlishly in response.

"What're you doing up there?" Is all she can blurt out.

"Sitting," He says matter-of-factly. As if Annabeth couldn't already see that. "What are you doing?" The boy parrots, climbing down the wide trunk.

She steps back when he stands in front of her. He looks about her age, if she's correct. "Collecting shells?" Annabeth burries her sandal-clad heel in the sand. She picks up the blue sea shell she's had her eye on.

"Look, this ones-"

"That's mine!" The boy springs forward suddenly, taking the object from her hands. His eyes are wide like saucers. "You found my lucky shell!"

Annabeth falters. "A lucky shell? What's that?" She tilts her head in confusion. To be honest, that's one of the most ridiculous things that she has ever heard. Not that Annabeth would tell that to the person's face. That would be pretty rude.

When he doesn't respond from being too enveloped in the shine of the shell's blue coat, she grumbles.

"That isn't yours!" She says more loudly. It can't be, it can't! Shells don't belong to people; they're natural things! Aren't they? Plus, what even is a lucky shell?

He scoffs. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!" Annabeth stares fully at the shell. "If it's yours, then prove it."

The boy huffs as he flips the shell over, shoving it right in her face. She has to take another step back to see it properly. More like to see the small letters properly. It's small, black, and messy, but Annabeth can make out the nearly unreadable scribbles.

PERCY . J

"You're Percy?" She looks back at him.

"Mhm!" The boyー Percyー beams. "So yeah. That's my lucky shell. I was looking for it for a while."

Her eyebrow twitches. "Oh..." Annabeth trails off, dissapointed. She wanted that shell. Dang it. "Are you sure?" He nods affirmatively, making her face droop. They both stay silent for a second, letting the sound of crashing against the shore take over.

Percy turns around. "I'm gonna go back to my cabin now."

Annabeth, as if breaking out from a trance, grabs his wrist. "Wait!" She yelps, pouting.

He turns back around quickly with a grumble. "What?

"D-do you..." She lets go of his wrist once she see's the judging look on the boy's face. "Do you know where the cabins are, by any chance?"

It's a weird question out of context, really, and Annabeth isn't sure why she asks him of all people. He probably doesn't know his way around either, not to mention that she doesn't expect him to answer.

It's comes as a surprise to her when he asks: "Which ones?"

Annabeth's lips tug upwards in a hopeful smile. "Uh..." She tries to remember where it is. "The ones with the really tall palm trees beside the shore?"

Percy pauses; his eyes look up into space as if he's looking for an answer from the gods. "Oh!" He looks over behind him, "Where there's this weird blue-roofed cabin to the right?"

"Yeah! That's The one!" She exclaims. Her face lights up with memory, thinking of the exact location.

"Oh," He looks directly at her now, "That's where I'm staying, too."

"Oh." Annabeth repeats.

"Yeah."

"Huh."

The Walk back is... Normal. They bicker back and forth, throwing subtle insults. At one point Annabeth bargains to take the blue sea shell back for three of the pink ones, but Percy refuses. She huffs.

"Where'd you get your lucky shell anyways?" Annabeth asks as her feet pads onto the slightly damp sand.

"My mom," He grins, holding it high above his head. "We found it here last year, and I just kept it! She said that it would be a nice souvenir." Percy says proudly.

She wants to ask more, prod more, but it seems like they're already at their detination. The tall palm trees. The weird blue-roofed cabin. Annabeth looks over to him, as it seems like the last time they'll ever see each other. Percy, however, looks surprised.

"You're my-" He freezes, looking back and forth at the two cabins in front of them. One is Annabeth's. And the other is...

"What?" Annabeth asks. "Something wrong?"

"You're my neighbor!?" Percy gasps, horror striking his face. He takes a disgusted shudder and steps away from the blonde.

"Don't act that disgusted!" She jokingly pushes his shoulderー with a little less than just 'jokingly' in the shove. "But this actually sucks. I don't really like you," Annabeth admits.

"Me neither!" Percy rolls his eyes. "Im going inside!"

She crosses her arms as she looks away. "Me too!"

"Goodnight!"

Annabeth doesn't know howー or whenー it happens, but their friendship blooms sometime along with way.

"Whatever!"

Scratch that. Friendship is too much of a strong word. For now, the two can settle on frenemies.

Plus, their frenemieship doesn't exactly happen umpormpted; it takes the parents to force them together. Aparently, Percy had told his mom about the whole scenario. Whispers come to talk, and there they are, sitting on the steps of Percy's cabin while the two's parents talk inside. Annabeth can hear the laughs coming from inside. It makes her seethe.

"Why'd you tell?" Is all she can mutter.

"My mom asked me where I was," Percy simply says, "So I did!"

"I had to thank you ten times because of that, and now look where we are!" Annabeth glared pointedly. "They're all buddies now. Ew."

He reels. "Shut up."

"No."

"Shut up!"

"I said no!"

The door creaks open, and they both freeze.

"Annabeth!" Frederick calls out, stepping onto the wooden deck. "Oh, it looks like you two have already bonded! How nice," He smiles, looking at the two of them who sit side to side. It looks like they had just had a deep convorsationー except not the one you'd expect. Percy's mom, who Annabeth heard her name was Sally, steps beside him with her own smile.

It's weird. This nice-looking, kind woman who is related to such a loser like Percy? Even being his mom? She can't see the resemblance.

"Aw, you two look like best buds!" Sally pats the two of them on the shoulder, warm smile etched across her face. Annabeth smilies in response, despite her thoughts: She has got to ditch Percy as soon as possible.

"Why don't you two go visit downtown?" She looks over to Percy. His scowl is wiped away once she does it, replaced with a forced grin. "It'd be nice for you two to hang out, wouldn't it?"

No, it would not, Annabeth wants to say. I dislike this dude very much.

But as her life goes, she never gets what she wants.

"Okay!" Percy smiles, standing up. He makes an attempt to leave Annabeth in the dust by walking as fast as he can, his actions being immediately noticed by her. All Sally and Frederick do is confuse it with excitement.

Downtown is a sunshiney place with colourful chalk on the shop walls that line the roadsides. There's a white marble fountain in the middle of the square, and a small grass filed where people play frisbee. Ice cream, pizza, ramen, you name it. The smells make both of their mouths water with hunger. Annabeth looks over to the hotdog stand with wantful eyes.

Percy's stomach grumbles.

"What?" He asks, embarassed, when Annabeth looks over at him. She looks away, rummaging through the pockets of her jean jacket. After pulling out a few green bills, she shuffles her feet.

"Here." Annabeth stuffs two of them in Percy's hands. "Let's go buy something."

He falters. "Wha- Thanks, but why?"

"My dad always tells me to be polite," She says formaly, head held high. "And I'm trying to do it. What? You think I actually like you? Please." Annabeth won't admit it, but she doesn't actually mean it.

Percy frowns. "Whatever."

It's bland as they eat, quietness shared between the two children. Annabeth chews dryly. Percy swallows thickly. They find a spot to sit; a colorful bench in the heart of all the comotion.

"No!" Annabeth groans when her half-eaten ice popsicle falls to the concrete ground. She pouts. "Aw, come on." The biker (the reason she accidentally let it fall) is long gone without as much of a glance.

Percy, on the other hand, eyes the red popsicle. He hasn't eaten his own yetー it being still wrapped up in it's yellow wrapper.

He offers it to her.

"Huh?" She takes it suddenly, eyes slightly shocked. Her mouth waters with hunger. "I-is this for me?" Annabeth asks. She peels the wrapper off begrudgingly, the sticky texture on her fingertips. It's blueberry flavoured. One of her favourites.

"Who else?" Percy rolls his eyes.

Annabeth scoffs. "I thought you were hungry."

"Yeah, but you seem pretty hungry too."

There's two sticks in the treat, meaning that they can split it. She does so, splitting it apart with a crack, and hands it back to him while looking away. "Here. Take this."

"Aw, you like me after all!" He nudges her, smiling widely and instantly popping it in his mouth.

"Its politeness!" Annabeth can manage for the word.

Percy isn't such a loser. And neither is she.

The stars twinkle brightly by the time they head back, cicadas and crickets back again to sing their songs. Percy looks at Annabeth while she enters her cabin. Her stares at her from his own doorway.

"Goodnight." Is all he says.

Annabeth doesn't know howー or whenー it happens, but their friendship blooms sometime along with way.

This time, Annabeth replies properly. "Goodnight."

The next week goes a lot like this: Percy comes over to her room, (Frederick and Helen has already taken a liking to him) beach ball in hand and sunscreen slathered on.

"Let's go swim!" He yanks the blanket from her half-asleep figure with a snicker.

"Leave me alone, doofus!"

She always complains, but goes with him anyways.

Some days it was Annabeth who woke him up. Some days she works up at the crack of dawn just to haul him to the beach where they swam for hours. Those days, she never complains.

But today, Percy accompanies Annabeth at the airport.

"You better write back to me," He crosses his arms and huffs as she gives a lopsided smirk. Her luggage, decorated with patches she had collected, stands at her side. Her Parents chat with Percy's with hugs exchanged and sad smiles. "Or else I'm not your friend anymore."

That's the first time Percy says she's a friend.

Despite that, she remains a steady face. Her heart is racing. "You can write?" Annabeth gasps, a fake look of shock on her face. When the boy gives her a dirty look, she chuckles. "Don't worry. I'm coming back here soon."

"When?" He asks instantly.

"Next year. Maybe longer." She replies, rocking back and forth on her heels. Her feet are replaced with her green sneakers, a change from a week of wearing nothing but sandals. There's a certain sadness lacing her tone.

"That's too long."

"I know."

They seem to be acting tough, possibly for their own sakes, but it all crumbles to the ground when they both tear up. They hug each other, tightly, as if they won't be seeing each other for an eternity. Maybe they will.

"I'll write to you everyday!" Annabeth promises, pulling away. Her eyes are puffy and her nose is running.

"You better!" Percy wipes his nose on his shirt. "And I will too!"

Annabeth can't quite keep the promise of sending letters every day, that being the reason of school and other things, but she and Percy can settle on every week.

It takes both their parents to pull them away from each other when the time finally comes.

Percy's letters always has his signature blue envelope. It's bright in her hands when she opens her mailbox a week after seeing him as she reads the front. Her name is misspelled three times, and the envelope is clumsily sealed. It's exactly what she had imagined. His mom must've written it for him, because the writing is ten times more neater. The words make her smile.

That night, she reads it again.

Annabeth sends her own letters, envelope and papers with owl prints drawn on. Like Percy, her own hand writing is messy. So she has Helen write most of it for her.

Back and forth through the four seasons. They both start to send little trinkets to the other, too: dried up flowers, favourite pens, even some of Percy's favourite candiesー blue Jolly Ranchers, but they seem to taste better when he sends it.

I seriously hate school, Percy writes in a letter one week, Everyone here sucks.

Well, not a few people, but a lot of people do. They're all rude. And suck ups. Even the teachers are like that! They all just act all better than me, just because. I don't really know why.

The next part is written in his own handwriting.

But of course, they're not! I beat them in dodgeball today, but i got a bruise on my cheek when I fell flat on my face. Nothing I can't handle!

Annabeth rolls her eyes at that, pen in hand while she reads the remians of it. She notes that there's a picture attached at the bottom with a obnoxious green paperclip. Taking it off, she stares at it.

Percy beams at her; er, the camera, a noticeable bruise square on his left cheek. A band-aid is stuck onto his forehead. Annabeth can only assume where it's from. For some reason the boy is smiling toothily. He looks exactly like he had been only a while ago, tanned skin and scrawny arms. His uncureable case of bedhead has also somehow stayed intact.

She sends her own picture: A amuture snap taken by her dad, standing in the sun at the park near her house. Her lips pull upwards into a wide, bright smile.

"Say cheese!" Frederick points the lenses to her.

Annabeth beams. "Cheeeese!" She giggles.

Percy doesn't want to admit it, but he'd spent more time than he liked staring at the picture.

Annabeth and Percy are right when they next meet again; though Annabeth likes to say that she's eight and three quarters.

The girl had arrived in the middle of the night while she was still snoring. Like last time, she had woken up in a bedー the same one as of today. Though she can't quite notice. Her body still radiates tiredness, mucsles sore and limbs unmoving.

"Annabeth!" Percy shakes the blonde awake, her hair messy hair shaking back and forth. She groans through her lips.

"Wha-" She flips over, looking at him. "Its- Percy!?" Annabeth jolts upwards, eyes wide and fully awake.

He smirks at her. "Hey." Percy stands up straight now, taking a step back. "Its been a while-"

Annabeth pulls him in for a hug. "i missed you!" She says, hugging him even more tightly. "So much!" Percy, after a second, hugs back with just as much happiness. His face burries in her shoulder.

"Me too," Percy replies, voice muffled. "So much."

It might be a long minute when they finally pull away.

"I-I was just being polite," Annabeth turns away with embarassment. "Don't think too much about it."

"Y-yeah, same."

They both know that they're lying.

After a while, it almost becomes routine. They spend a blissful week together playing on the beach. Both Percy and Annabeth cry their eyeballs out when they have to leave. The rest of the year is spent exchanging letters.

Summer of when they're twelve, Annabeth says something that makes Percy frown immediately.

"We won't be able to come back here for a while," She says, laying on the sand.

"Oh." Percy says. "That's what you always say. "So... You'll be here next year."

She sighs, looking at the waves lapping across the sandy shores. People swim happily in the cool waters, unlike them, who sit under the shade of a tall palm tree.

"...Right?" He repeats slowly, carefully, when she doesn't respond.

"No." Annabeth burries her face in her hands. "We won't be coming next year. Or the year after that."

"What!?" Percy''s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "And why not?"

"Helen, she... You know that the twins will be born soon. And my dad wants to take a break from vacations for a while." She grumbles.

"And that means-"

"We won't be coming back for a very, very long time."

Dread dawns onto Percy like a spotlight.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Then it truly settles in.

"Oh, no."

The next night is what Percy assumes to be the last night spent with Annabeth in a few years. That sentence makes him sick to the stomach, so he avoids thinking about it.

If he stops thinking about it, will it never happen? If he somehow begs Annabeth's parents, will she come again next year? If Percy, someway, hopes hard enough, will she be here next year, and the next?

His thoughts gnaw at him like rats. Laying awake in his messy bed, chapped lips and ruffled hair.

There's really only one thing that can help him now.

"Hey." Percy manages to sneak into Annabeth's room via window. Her room is chilly. He feels like scolding her for keeping her window unlocked, but then Percy would just sound like his mom. He nudges her softly. "Wake up."

Annabeth, groggy and sleep deprived, opens one of her eyes. "Hm? Oh..." Hse tries to keep her eyes open. "Percy?"

It's a small whisper. Her mouth is dry and her limbs are sore. Annabeth's pillow is dampened; she had just cried only hours prior before she passed out fron exhaustion. Its a bleak memory that A Annabeth cringes upon. She chews her lip.

"C'mon," Percy says, "Let's go to our spot."

Annabeth doesn't put up a arguement. She knows that he wants to spend the most time together as possible, and the feeling is mutual. She feels her own sort of sadness: An icky feeling that leaves her feeling all scummy when she remembers she wont see Percy for a very long time.

So she goes with him, cotton sweater flimsy flip-flops hastily threwn on. Their footsteps make the old wood creak, but thankfully, no one wakes from the noises.

Their 'Spot' is a hill, high above the rising tides. Its where they go every year. Its where they made memories. Its a place that they can't imagine ever staying away from.

The nightly wind is gone this particular night. It only leaves comfortable silence.

"So how long will you be away for?" Percy asks, pulling his knees to his chest. Hus eyes droop down.

Annabeth fiddles with a stick she found on the grassy ground. "I don't wanna say it. Its too long."

But after she hesitates, Annabeth gives in. "...Six years."

"What?"

"Six years," She repeats, more strongly this time, "That's my estimate."

Percy's breath hitches in his throat. Six years? Six years without her?

"That's forever." Percy comes to the horrible conclusion. No, no- there must be somesort of mistake! Annabethwill be here next year, and that's that. "Are you sure?"

Annabeth nods grimly. Her eyes are screwed shut, as if she cant see it, it won't happen. If she cant see, then maybe it'll all be a bad dream.

She's just like him.

They both know its futile to do anything else. To do something, one last thing, one last visit down, one more. Its bitterly cold. Saltwater invades their senses, and to be honestー they're both exhausted. From a week of long playing in the sun. From a lot of things.

For now, each others company is enough. To know that they're there, in person, is enough. Being together is enough.

So they lay there.

Hand in hand, shoulders pressed up together. The moonlight is the only thing helping Annabeth see in the dark, while Percy grips her hand tighter. The stars above... They're bright. Tiny, miniscule, but they're bright and shining. Like yesterday. Today. And forever. He sniffs. The sky is incoming and unchanging. That's how both Percy and Annabeth want it to beー unchanging between them.

The next morning is bland. Annabeth wakes up with a large amount of dread looming over her, like a heavy cloud of muck. From the clock on her nightstand she can read 5:02 AM; a time in which Percy is most likely fast asleep.

That doesn't really matter. They're goodbyes are said, long done, and that's that. Annabeth already had a bittersweet moment with Percy. Why ruin with a tearful goodbye?

It hurts to not say one last goodbye to him.

The airport. Even at such a early time, it still hums with livelyness and people's chattering. Well, you know what they say. The airport never really does stop working. Not for anyone.

If Percy was here now, what would he say? Give a last cocky smirk and throw a snarky insult? Annabeth would just laugh it off and hug him, as per usual, as per every year. It's a shame.

her parents have already entered the airport, leaving Annabeth standing in front of the huge terminal. She lets out a sigh and clutches her luggage closer. Well. this is it for-

"Annabeth!"

Is that- No. It can't be. Annabeth grips the metal handle of her luggage harder. It makes her knuckles turn into a sickly shade of pale, resembling a sheet of paper. He's not here. He's asleep, gone, and I'm imagining things. He can't possibly be-

"Wisegirl!"

When the voice calls out again, Annabeth knows for sure that it's him.

Percy.

The boy instantly engulfs her in a hug. It's warm, soft, familiar. All the qualities Annabeth likes most about him.

Great, she's tearing up.

"Don't forget me." Percy mumbles into her shoulder. "Please don't forget me." His voice is watery and wavering: He's crying. She can feel is tears dampening her sweater-clad shoulder, and all she can think is how she's doing the same.

"Never," Annabeth says, squeezing her eyes shut. "I promise."

Percy wants to say so much. How he woke up through his tiredness. How he biked here, all one hour of it, to find her, and how he couldn't sleep because he needed to hear her voice. Childish or immature as it be, its true.

He pulls away slowly and rummages through his pockets as he sniffs. "Here. Take this."

Annabeth's eyes widen. "You're" She grips it, mouth going dry. His shell, still blue as ever and pristine, tilts in her hands. "You're gonna give me this?"

She knows it's his favourite thing in the world, save for blue cookies and his small whale plushie. He never leaves it unattended, never dirties it, either. Annabeth knows that Percy never lends it to anyone, and keeps it like it's his life's worth. So why is he giving it to her? His eyes are teary and foggy as tears spill from his eyes, but she can't see any regret or remorse on his face. That's means he's giving it to her with no qualms, whatsoeverー But why?

"You better make sure to return it!" Percy sniffles again, wiping his runny nose on his shirt. "I'll be waiting!"

"I will."

Annabeth thinks that's the most she's cried ever.

The years pass like clockwork, because really, it is.

It's happens like any other year. She goes to school, gets good grades and live like any other day. She sends letters to Percy consistently. They're all sent with souvenirs, trinkets, little notes and scraps. It helps in a theraputic way.

Annabeth doesn't really blame her parents for taking a break. She tries to understand. And it's hard. The twins are lovely. Lovely as newborns can get, at least, they're smiley and bright. Matthew and Bobby, that's their names. They don't cry much. Annabeth likes that. They throw food at her sometimes. Annabeth doesn't like that.

Summer thirteen passes slowly. She tries to pass it with friends, but none of them can really compare to Percy.

Summer fourteen Annabeth enters Highschool. She keeps Percy's lucky she'll on her bedside table, stacked upon a cluster of books. She spends that summer inside, reading books about architecture. They can distact her from the dread of missing him.

Summer fifteen and she sends a package to Percy. There's the usual letter, one of her favourite books, and notes for the new math curriculum that they both happen to be on. She knows that he seriously hates reading, but Annabeth doesn't really expect him to read it.

(He spends all night reading it.)

Summer sixteen, and Percy sends the recipe for his mom's famous blue cookies. That makes her smile uncontrollably. Percy never trusts anyone that much to send one of his favorite recipes; much less the one for his most prized blue cookies. Annabeth is sure to send a recipe of her own for her favorite apple pie.

(Percy can't really stop eating it. Somehow, it reminds him if her.)

Summer seventeen Annabeth makes new friends. They make her mind forget about Percy more, but when she's laying awake at night, she can't really stop thinking about him. He's grown. His smile is as warm and bright as ever, and his hair which was once ruffles in a messy way had become endearing. Annabeth thinks it suits him.

She sends her own pictures. Annabeth thinks that she hasn't grown very much compared to Percy, but she's grown in height. Her hair reaches a length's past her shoulders, and her curls have become more tameable. It's easier to style.

Percy can write much better now, too. His writing is somewhat readable. His letters are still cocky and sarcastic as ever, but his words can clearly shows that he misses her. Annabeth does too. He's learned how to surf. Percy promises to teach her when she visits again. Not to mention he got a dogー a huge, massive ball of black fluff named Mrs. O'Leary. Apparently she's a rescue from one of his neighbours. Annabeth has her own dog as well; a lanky Doberman that she calls cerberus. She swears to introduce him to Mrs. o'leary.

(He looks forward to that.)

Still summer seventeen, and Annabeth learns that Percy has gotten close with someone.

She's supportive of him, of course, but Annabeth can't really say that when she frowns at the news. Rachel. That's her name. Rich, red-haired and pretty, she's probably a good fit for him. Annabeth sees her in the pictures he sends. Beach trips together, days spent in each other's company. She tries as hard as she can not to say something about it.

Rachel is pretty. Rachel is kind. She donates to homeless shelters and fundraises to help the rainforest, Rachel is the daughter of some rich buisness owner.

Rachel is everything Annabeth is not.

Laying on her bed that night, she comes to a horrible realization.

Those feelings of jealousy... They’re more than that, aren't they? It's more, so much more, it's the feeling of desire. Wanting. Because after years, Annabeth learns that she likes Percy.

And Percy likes someone else.

Summer eighteen and Annabeth is on the plane to her family’s cabin. She's eighteen years old now; it's been six years.

Six, long years of waiting, six summers spent wasting, six years of exchanging letters. Six years of waiting and longing.

Her leg bounces up and down erratically as the plane nears it's destination, the window passing blinding white clouds. The airport was just as busy as Annabeth remembered. The sights, smells, sounds... It's been a while since she's experienced this. It makes her mind race.

"You excited?" Helen gives a small smile towards her. The twins snore loudly beside her. "I bet you are. It's been a while since you've seen him, right?"

"Mhm," Annabeth hums, grinning to herself. Somehow, she already knows who Helen is talking about. "Six years."

"Hm?"

"Its been six years," She says, leaning her cheek on her palm. "Six years since I've last seen him."

Percy.

Annabeth is eighteen when she falls in love with the beach for the second time.

The cabin looks just like it was before. Dark brown wood, potted plants littering the windowsills, metal and glass chimes hanging from the ceilings. Nostalgia runs through Annabeth's mind.

So, with her hair flying behind her and parents chuckling behind her from the car, she bursts open the doors with laboured breaths. The humidity is at a level so high it gets Annabeth's hair all frizzyー but she doesn't mind one bit. She takes a deep inhale.

Fresh saltwater. Driftwood, the sweet smell of vanilla, the alluring scent of coral.

"Can I go out?" Annabeth practically jumps the whole way to the living room, parents unpacking. She runs her hands on the walls; she knows the place like a book from all the previous years spent there.

Annabeth's heart drops when they shake their heads. "Sorry, sweetie," Frederick sighs. "Could you wait until dinner? The twins would probably follow you everywhere; they're pretty energetic right now."

She frowns. "But-" Annabeth exhales, and her shoulders slump. "...Alright."

As the blonde walks back to her room, she can't help but think: Where even is Percy? At the beach? In his room? It's been a while since she last sent a letterー but Annabeth thought he would be expecting her. Maybe not. Maybe, he's busy spending time with Rachel. Not that she really blames him.

So she lays there, staring at the white ceiling. It's smooth unlike her popcorned ceilings back at her house. Annabeth can imagine what Percy's doing right now; most likely teaching Rachel how to surf, like he wrote in his most previous letter. That was... A month ago, right? She's learned how to surf, too.

Annabeth eats dinner with a small frown on her face.

What's the point? She thinks to herself, shoving the plate of noodles in her mouth. She slurps it up. What's the point in seeing him, anyways?

Well, let's see. One: I haven't seen him in six years. That's true. Annabeth's heart aches to see him again, but she can't really bring up the courage to see him.

Two: I have to return his lucky sea shell. She thinks of the shell that stands on her bedside table. It's coat is blue and chipped at that point from all the years.

Three: I really, really want to see him again. Annabeth agrees to herself to that, but there's something lacking. Something that's stopping her from seeing him.

What if Percy doesn't want to see me?

It's stupid, sure, after everything they went through, why would Percy not want to see her? The airport visit from six years ago was enough to proove her wrong, but... The doubt still lingers on Annabeth's head. Rachel was probably fine. She doesn't even know the girl for goodness sakeー why would Annabeth ever hate her in any way?

So, stepping out of the cabin with a determined look, she starts off to find Percy.

The cabin next to hers has no occupants. There's people living in there of course, the light inside gives it away. But there's none inside.

Okay. Next, the beach. The sure is setting, so only a few last minute stragglers are there. The waves are just as beautiful as Annabeth imagined. She chews on her bottom lip, where could he be? Downtown. The ice cream shop. Even the boardwalk. Annabeth has no luck in finding the raven haired boy.

Well, desperate times call for desperate measures.

She walks up to their spot.

It's like a walk to memory lane, really, the trees stretch even farther and the grass is way outgrown. The old log that she and Percy used to sit on is now covered with moss and growing mushrooms. Annabeth smiles to herself. It's been a while.

Have those bags always been here? She thinks to herself. She eyes the bags: Two of them, one black and one a vibrant splash of colors. They must belong to someone else.

When Annabeth sees a familiar figure, she practically beams, because holy shit, it's Percy!

His shoulders are broader than she remembered. His hair is gorgeously fluffy and volumous, and his voice is more richer than Annabeth thought. But, wait- why is he talking to himself?

"Seaweed br-"

That when Annabeth sees her.

A head of red hair sits beside him, laughing to spend joke of his. Or at least that's what Annabeth thinks is happening. Oh, her face falls. That must be Rachel. She fit the description she has had in her head for a while now: Pretty. Laid back.

Annabeth thought their spot was a spot for themー a spot where their memories were made, a spot where Percy introduced her to, a spot where only Annabeth knew.

Her arm slowly drops to her side when Rachel pecks him on the cheek.

Walking back, she thinks she's a fool. How could she be the only person who knew of that place? Such an idiot! Of course Percy would find someone else, like someone else, kiss someone else. Annabeth can't blame him. She can't blame Rachel, or anyone else, because how could she?

That night, Annabeth can't fall asleep.

(Percy can't either, because he can't stop thinking about Annabeth and how he thinks he saw her back there.)

[hetalia-has-a-secretary]

Russia X Secretary: Fear of First time (1/2) (NSFW)

TW: Sexual Themes, and mentions of violence. (handsypandsy is my NSFW tag!)

A/N: This is going to be a short story made into two parts. Both of which are going to be kind of long. (Also if anyone can do a word count on this that would be nice, because I currently have no way of doing that...)

This was a conversation they have had but once. Russia and the secretary for the world meetings had already been together for more than a handful of months. The secretary had expressed previously that she was fully intending to wait for marriage to give away her virginity. Both for religious reasons, and due to some past events that made her subconscious about her body, making her insecure. Russia, dissapointed in her reaction toward his advances, had informed her marriage between a country and human was forbidden. None the less he respected her decision, and stayed by her side regardless.

This had put a small wedge in their relationship. He was frustrated over not being able to physically show her his affection, and grew angry over having another reason that made being a country painfully annoying. The secretary on the other hand was having a bit of a crisis. On one hand she wanted to keep her virginity, but on the other hand, she felt her own Sexual frustration rise. It took only a week for her mind to change on the subject.

They were watching a movie on her couch, but the tension between them made the air heavy, and focusing on the movie impossible. They had tried cuddling, but with every touch and shift Russia grew akward, and impatient. He wanted nothing more but to feel her, and show his ever growing desires. Never in his life had this kind of feeling bloomed before, let alone the fact he accepted someone's rejection of his actions. If they did he'd usually force them to do what he wants anyway. So natural he was going to bring the subject up again, eventually. But lucky for him the Secretary beat him to the question.

"Hey Russia... Can we talk about something?"

"Da? Is something the matter?"

The deep breath she took made him temporarily forget the sensations that had been flaring up and agitating him, and focus on her concern.

"I know that we can't get married... And it has me thinking it doesn't matter if I stay a virgin over it, and I think I need to explain another reason why I said no..."

At this point Russia had already turned towards her, pushing some of her short black hair out from her face as she continued.

"It's not just the religious thing. It's not even how I was treated when I was younger. I'm just scared. I didn't want to do it if we weren't married because I was worried you'd just take what you wanted and just... Leave me."

Russia had to take a second to realize what she had said. His heart partially shattered over the fact she would assume something like that.

"Sunflower, If I wanted to take from you, I could have easily done so already. I understand I am not always pure and sweet, but I do not take from you. You usually give me what I want anyway."

He tried smiling for her, but nothing was able to hide the tone in his voice showcasing his inner pain. The secretary had picked up on it, her body shrinking back, and her throat swelling up from her emotions.

"No, I didn't mean it like that it's just- I don't want to lose you. I didn't want to do it with you, and disappoint you. What if I'm not good enough, what if I'm too disgusting and you decide to leave me anyway..."

He had enough of her attitude towards the subject and got up from the couch, rubbing his face from the pent up emotions. This made the secretary choke on her sadness, and she did all she did to keep her tears from falling.

Turning around to face her, Russia could feel his heart shatter further seeing the glisten in her eyes. He understood, or took her feelings in consideration at the very least, but his inability to communicate his feelings properly left him with only one option. Giving her a slight scare, he had sweeper her up off the cushions bridal style.

"What are you doing?"

"We are going to be making the love. I will not allow you to be feeling like this, So I am proving your feelings wrong."

She felt a layer of blush immediately dust her cheeks, and buried her face into his shoulder. Giving a small whimper of protest, but ultimately giving in. Her heart racing.

"F-fine. But-"

"Nyet! No more denying my advances. No more rejecting me, da?"

"But why would you even bother?"

He had to kick the door open that lead to the downstairs guest room, and tossed her lightly on the bed. Immediately hovering over her.

"You are not this dense, but you currently are acting like you are. I do not understand, or care, why you think I'd care about your insecurities."

He had slightly cringed at the last statement, fully realizing how that translation came across after saying it. But this seemed to get the point across as the secretary had looked away, a small smirk on her face.

"You can't just say something like that you know."

"And you can't keep testing my patience by teasing me."

She tilted her head, not fully understanding what he meant. Prompting him to explain.

"You are very cute. I would be lying if I did not admit too... Erhm- Thinking about this?"

The secretary chuckled at him.

"Do you mean... You have fantasies of me?"

Russia nods almost shyly, lifting his scarf over his nose, looking away in hopes she didn't notice his flustered cheeks. Though his actions made it painfully obvious.

"D-da. The daydreaming started out all cute. But as of lately..."

She had to caress his cheek, forcing him to look back at him as she spoke up.

"I'm sorry... I really didn't know I hurt you when I said no the first time."

"I was not hurt! I did not like being told no because... Well... I can't... Marry you..."

This came to a major surprise to the secretary.

"Wait- You want to marry me? I thought you'd be against that because of Belarus? For a while I was concerned I was being too clingy..."

Russia gave her a small grunt.

"But you are not her! I don't mind the thought of marriage, but with my little sister who has little concern over my feelings... Are you laughing at me?"

She had to cover her mouth, but the small giggles still slipped through.

"Sorry! It's just, Kind of ironic hearing that from you..."

She gently booped his nose as soon as he scrunched his face up in annoyance. Russia fully knowing he can't disagree with her statement. The atmosphere finally turning lighthearted like it use to be.

This didn't distract Russia from being his mischievous self though. Gently he laid his weight on top of the secretary, kissing her, then pulling away as soon as their lips touched. He wasn't expecting the soft look in her eyes, lips still parted from the kiss. He didn't even miss the motion of her swallowing the excess saliva.

Giving a quirked eyebrow he decided to push a little further.

"Does this mean, you have decided to change your mind? I can make the love to you?"

The laugh that she gave him over his slight broken english seemed to rile him up more, especially with the rapid nods she gave him.

Feeling his breath hitch in his throat he dove in for a more passionate kiss. Memories of their first kiss and how sloppy it was flooded his mind, causing him to smile against her.

Soon enough the secretary found her hands in his hair, but had given grunts of disapproval as Russia pinned her hands above her. His tongue tracing her lips, wiggling its way into her mouth. The friction of bumpy tongue against her smoother muscle gained a soft moan from both parties.

Russia pulled back, shifting his weight back to hovering, and asked another question.

"So you really are still a virgin, da? I'm sorry if I get to rough with you. Even more so I am sorry if I go against your will to stop at any point. But the thought of having you squirm against me makes me want to... You know."

She blushed, giving a quick nod. She figured he wasn't going to be able to stop once they started. But the thought of him being rough excited her. She was always being told how cute, and small she was at work. How fragile a human was in a room of strong countries and it irked her. She had to get it off her chest.

"I can take it you know. I'm not a little kid, just because I'm a little childish-"

"I would hope not!"

"Let me finish! It drives me insane that everyone else gets to act like I'm a child! I hate it, it makes me feel guilty. Especially because I don't even feel like a woman half the time. I'm over weight, overwhelming, and according to my family I'm way to clingy... So I wouldn't be upset if you didn't want to do this..."

Russia was about five seconds away from taking her without permission. He didn't want to hurt her, or be forceful like that, but the more reasons she gave for "leaving", and the more excuses She gave that stalled the moment was quite Frankly, driving him insane. He was losing the remainder of his patience.

"You are very cute, and pretty. You're working on losing weight, so let me help. This is like excersize right? I do not think you're childish, you're just fun, and goofy! It is very nice to have someone fool around with me..."

Leaning in closer to the side of her head, he makes sure to whisper and breath directly in her ear. A small little trick he discovered that he knows drives her crazy.

"I think you are very womanly. You might have a chubby belly, but you still have curves. And you're... Breasts... are just the right size for me. You being so affectionate and honest makes it very easy to be with you. You don't do what some woman do and pretend to be fine. I don't just like it about you, I need it from you. If you were not like you, I'd be confused. We already discovered once what happens when you lie to me. I am unsure if choking is a thing you like, but I am very sure the last time my hands were around your neck, it was not a pleasant experience..."

The secretary couldn't hold back her remark.

"No. It did not give me the pleasure smile..."

Russia gave a short chortle, kissing her cheek and pressing their forheads together.

"Then do you want me as well? Can I... I can't be honest about my feelings verbally, not like you. So can I please, one of these times show you how you make me feel? Preferably now?"

Deciding to tease him, she pretended to think about it, laughing at his drawn out groan as he buried his head in the crook on her neck. Surprised by the kisses to her flesh, and the small line up of pleases he begged with. Any anwser was a good one for him.

"Da. We can... Have sex then. But just promise me you'll be by my side by morning..."

She felt him nod against her neck, his kisses turning into soft nibbles, and sucking. He didn't want to waste anymore time, but knew from all the movies he watched with her that the first time was important. And just because he was virgin as well, did not mean he didn't know what to do, or how it might hurt.

He started to chuckle into her chest, already leaving small red marks along her throat. His hands had wormed their way under her shirt. His cold fingertips mixed with the feathery touches made her squirm and shudder.

Her heart leaped into her throat as he reached around her torso, and successfully unclasped her bra. She was in shock at how gentle he was being. She was fighting between enjoying the moment, and flipping him over and try to move things along faster.

"You don't have to be so gently. I said I could take it..."

"Da, I know. But I refuse to hurt you."

"Hurt me? I trust you lovebug~ your my big old Russian teddy bear! You couldn't hurt me even if you tried-"

"Not what I was meaning."

Her face turned beat red as it dawned on her what he meant. Now she was morbidly courious if he was really that big, and her eyes unintentionally drifted to his crotch.

He gave her an unseen smirk, and sat himself on her hips. He carelessly pulled off his shirt, somehow leaving his scarf intact, earning an annoyed face from the secretary. Taking the obvious hint he slowly removed his scarf. The scaring on his neck made her eyes widen, and her heart weight heavy in her chest.

"Wh- Russia..."

He shook his head, not wanting to talk about it. All he could say was:

"You are not the only one uncomfortable with their body..."

He leaned back down, his taller body making it possible to stay seated over her hips, giving him easier access to her lips and face. Hands snagging the hem of her shirt, and doing away with the fabric. Her bra falling away with it as well.

She covered her chest, already red and wet from his earlier barrage of licking and kisses. Yet again he pinned her arms over her head.

"If you continue to hide from me Sunflower, I will tie you up..."

She looked away after his claims, but nodded in understanding anyway.

He gave her more kisses, this time they were soft, and ticklish. He made sure to run his lips over each spot she gave the most giggles too, indulging in her sounds. Soon enough he had the ability to tongue at her nipples, hearing her giggles go to restrained moans. For Russia, any further restraint from her was delt with punishment. He started testing her further as such.

He went from licking, to sucking. And when that bared no vocal fruit from her he bit down on them. Her attempts at arching her back Was held in place by his body. But he got what he wanted. She had given him a rather loud moan, even if it sounded pained she did nothing to protest against his actions.

Giving a courious peak he saw the contorted and scrunched up face she was giving. Her teeth digging into her lips. Another bite, and another painful groan. These pleasant sounds were rewarded with kisses, and sucks to her perked up breasts. Russia was seemingly successful in training her to stop resisting, causing her to finally relax and let go.

-End of Part one-

[phaoray]

The movie inside Pixar’s “Brave”

Hey, I don’t know if you remember me, but im a massive Brave fan, and in the times that the big four fandoms where roaming in this website strong, I was there too. Especially at the Jarida fandom @thejaridafamily​, who to this day, i have nothing but awesome comments. I swear to you, this people were so kind and energetic and creative that you could literally feel how much they cared about the stories and the process of creating and developing this characters.

Now, I don’t usually write this type of analysis, but indulge me this time. Because the reason I’m writing, it’s because this amazing video that was uploaded a few months ago to YouTube (And if I’m late for the party, then sorry).

“Brave was a dissapointment by eliquorice”

This video puts a name to the reason why I felt this movie was incomplete, or disappointing at most. The movie always felt like it was undeserving from such a dedicated fan base, but I can finally say that i finally saw the film that we all loved. At the beginning of the film we are exposed to this story, the story of a princess who is wild and tempestuous and a queen who is strong willed and regal. They are opposites in every way, and they tell us that this movie it’s going to be about them. 

We are intrigued about what will happen after the inciting incident, where both this characters have said and done things that they cannot take back. We have reached a no return point.

And while we are worried about their inner conflict, and wish to know what will come of it, the film suddenly develops a series of external conflicts and focuses on those exclusively.

We can make the choice to read it as an external manifestation of the struggle of the relationship, but even then, we are left confused. Instead, it turns the tone of the film and displaces the importance of those inner conflicts to a second position in the entire argument of the film. 

Now the priority is to resolve this external conflict, so we can go back and finish quickly the inner conflicts right before we run out of time.

After I saw the film a couple of times (by a couple i mean like a lot, in the past years), I started to feel like there was something missing. Like I have forgotten to read the prologue at the beginning of a book. So I turned to the other media released after the film: the art books, the interviews and promotions and trailers and the storybooks they were doing to continue and explore characters of the film. But instead of gaining a better understanding of the central theme of the film, I always ended up with more questions. Until I saw this guys (eliquorice) video a few days ago.

He makes a clear and structural analysis of the film and finally helps me to put a name to the real issue with the story. The “creative differences” problem.

Now not to spoil the video, but he honestly states why this film was a wasted opportunity for Pixar and why women´s voices keep on being silenced in Hollywood. A film like Brave, in the time that it came out and given properly freedom to be the story that was always meant to be in the hands of Brenda Chapman, could have turned the view of the mother-daughter relationship to the status that movies like Ladybird, Carrie, Real Women Have Curves, or even Freaky Friday explored in different levels of dept. 

The conflicts that come from two different ways of approaching femininity and the way we as women chose to play different roles in the society that we live in, as it is what is imposed to us from young ages. This movie was about that, the first 30 minutes of this movie were about that.

But what we got at the end was a mushed version with no catharsis towards the true conflict in the film. 

Even in the final scenes when we see Elinor side with her daughter about the marriage matter, we are left with half a catharsis when in the next scene we see an outfit change instead of a change in the structure of the society they live in.

There is one thing that keeps people invested during the climatic scenes in movies, and that is a question, i.e. "would the hero survive to this?" "can the protagonist defeat the antagonist or the villain?" "will the protagonist confess to his love interest" you name it. We as an audience stay invested in a film as long as there is a question to be answered in every scene or every act. We can even use that idea for analyzing a film.

Now let's talk about how the film answers the question that sets the conflict between the two main characters.

In Brave, Merida thinks changing her mother is the solution to change her fate, because she thinks she alone, is the creator of the system. The princess rules and the way things must be. But in reality her mother is the enforcer of those believes that were also planted on her as "the way it was supposed to be", which she mentions in a line at the beginning as "giving you everything we never had". We also see throughout the film that her mother is not the head of the system, she actually serves it in the form of peacemaker to keep the four clans together as a nation. Merida then realizes that her mother's saying might be the least of her troubles because who calls the shots here is not the king, it's the alliance, the Lords that are the heads of the clans.

Her mother does change at the end, but that change while represents a little break for Merida, in the end comes to the same conclusion, she will have to marry ... eventually and select from a very specific set of elegible partners. Which again is the enforcement of tradition that reduces women into roles that do not fit nor appeal to them.

The film doesn't dive deeper into this discussion, it concludes by saying that it was in fact a matter of changing one person and yourself by accepting you have to make compromises to get what you want. Which is... I guess... halfway true in the real world???at least in the one we live in Right now... but its definitely not what you want from the first Disney/Pixar princess to not have a romantic interest and being promoted as this empowering model for little girls.

This film left's us short in a satisfactory and fulfilling answer to the great question of "Can Merida change her fate?" And the refusal to answer that question in a way that makes us feel powerful and brave makes it feel like the world they lived in didn't change at all, that the film has been for nothing.

Please go watch that video, i highly encourage it. 

And after watching the video and reading my old writings and drawings about this film, I understood, that the reason that this fandom loved this characters so much, was because of the first 30 minutes of the movie. The part that Brenda Chapman originally envisioned for this film. I honestly believe that in the hands of a woman this conflicts that surged with being a girl and mom in a world that is not made for you, could have had an actually satisfactory message of hope and change. She probably wouldnt have swiped over those questions like the film did. And those 30 minutes that promised us an answer to this very complex questions... that is the movie we have loved for the past 8 years, and i can say i will continue to love for a long time.

[elbiotipo]

Gordon Freeman Saved My Life!

City 17 wasn’t on its best shape before the Citadel exploded; now, the quaint European streets and brutalist apartment blocks were little more than random piles of concrete scattered around. Many people left already after the final defeat of the Combine and the liberation of Earth. Even if Dr. Kleiner insisted that the radiation left by the explosion was “harmless, by the most part”, in all common sense, there was little reason to stay there.

But the thing is, City 17 was inhabited by humans. And where some humans just see devastated ruins, others see things worth cherising, a place worth rebuilding.

“I think a couple greenhouses would look good up there in that roof. Plenty of sun, and the rest of the building seems mostly intact, it would look downright decent with a new coat of paint. A good place to start anew... many people would love something like that... What do you think, Doc?”

Alyx looked at Gordon, deep in his thought. Even such little dilemmas of (now) daily life put the gears on his mind to work. She didn’t really expect an answer; a verbal one at least, it was rare from him after all (though more common lately...). But she did know he would respond with action, as he always did. He scratched his beard -he was letting it grow lately- and fixed his glasses. Frankly, of all the crazy things she’d lived with Gordon, the most amazing one was the fact he didn’t lose his glasses once. Good thing, too; the optical industry was just barely being rebuilt.

Gordon nodded at Alyx. He went ahead and entered through the broken windowshop and climbed the stairs of the abandoned building, crowbar in one hand, the gravity gun on his hip. Ecological restoration was going on steadily, but headcrabs were still a nuisance in urban areas -as much as a jumping rotisserie chicken that can horribly zombify you can be called a ‘nuisance’- luckily, this building was clean. He got to the roof. He felt the wind on his sweat, the soft spring sun on his skin, and thought, after some brief calculations, that it was good.

So he took out the gravity gun and started his job. With the patience of a kid on his last coin in a crane machine, he unloaded the supplies from the boxes labeled “FOR EARTH RECONSTRUCTION - BLACK MESA SCIENCE TEAM”; metal beams, rolls of plastic, pipes, soil, planters, seedlings, and other materials to build greenhouses to feed the citizens of what was still one of the world’s largest cities; and then slowly started to bring them to the roof of the old 20th century building.

He was very good at theoretical physics, but he could had been a good engineer too. Or a farmer. Physical work suited him, Alyx thought. A lot.

Even if the gravity gun did most of the job.

Heh. Physicist, physical.

“You’re an eager worker antlion today, Gordon. You didn’t even wait for me, huh?” she teased from below.

“You were right, Alyx.”

Gordon, of course, seldom spoke, and when he did, it was always in a serious tone. Even when talking from the top of a building. Despite spending so much time together, it still caught Alyx off-guard sometimes; while she felt easy to talk to him most of the time, to answer him often made her blush and stammer, no matter the topic.

She should just spit it out one of these days and be done with it, she thought. Goddamn it, wasn’t it time already? How long would she wait?

“W-what do you mean?”

“The angle of the sun is excellent here. And the roof has good space. Perfect for a greenhouse. Good eye, Alyx.” he said, not taking his eye from his work, like always.

“Oh. Right. Yeah, you know...” she scratched the back of her head. “Anything to make the work of my worker antlion easier.”, and gave a thumbs up with a wink. Gordon smiled, and while he was a bit far away, she swore he blushed. Yep, cute names worked. The wink couldn’t have hurted either.

As she watched Dr. Gordon Freeman manipulate the laws of physics with the amazing power of science, she had a fun idea.

“Hey, hey, Gordon!”

He looked at her.

“Pick me up!”

Gordon lifted his eyebrows.

“With the gravity gun! Bring me up to the roof!”

Gordon looked away, thinking. He was unsure.

“Come on, it’ll be fun! I’ll help you out when I get up there, promise!”

Gordon sighed.

“I’ll be careful! Come on, antlion!”

‘It was him who needed to be careful!’, he worried.

She would either keep at it all afternoon or be dissapointed later. And Gordon never wanted to disapoint Alyx. So he carefully checked the settings, and finally pointed the gravity gun at her and engaged it.

The graviton particle beam of the Zero Point Energy Field Manipulator surrounded her and produced a sensation on her skin that could be best described as ‘tingly’. She slowly lifted from the ground and she couldn’t help but smile.

“Oh yeah, this rules!” She said, and struck a Superman pose, while humming the theme from an old movie, as she got higher. She was getting close to the roof.

“Higher, Gordon!” She said, as she did a loop in mid air. “Woo!”. Gordon couldn’t help but smile, despite the anxiety that seeing her floating in the air sensibly provoked.

She ‘flew’ right in front of him. They both smiled, face to face, although he was standing and she was resting on an invisible air couch. Alyx giggled.

“Hey, take me higher! I wanna see the city from above!”

Gordon was, on his mind, nervously calculating vectors, trajectories and forces so that Alyx didn’t fall down. Even her weight, though maybe it was a little rude. It wasn’t the first time he thought about Alyx’s body, though, as much as he wouldn’t admit it at all...

The beam was on a weird setting to begin with, and as she flew over him, he was worried on how much longer he could keep it up. She was too high, and the gravity gun wasn’t as reliable as one would like, and if she fell down she definitively could hurt herself, and after all it happened, it couldn’t be like that, and he had to do something!

“Alyx...”

“Wooo! What is it, Gordon?”

He was trying to bring her down, when the beam grew fainter and she started to fall, walking in midair. It was just as he feared. He dropped the gun and ran to her.

He catched her on his arms. He wasn’t wearing the HEV suit (fortunately it was needed less and less...) but his arms were strong enough to carry her.. like a princess, maybe? He wouldn’t say that to her face.

The both of them gasped and then exhaled. Alyx was smiling. It got a little scary at the end, sure, but she had worse. It was more of a thrill than anything.

And another thing that was thrilling right now was being princess-carried by the One Free Man.

“Wow.” She sighed. “Uh, t-thanks for the, the catch, Gordon...” She stammered. She looked at his face. She expected to see him blushing and looking away, like he did lately. Instead, he looked at her with worry, breathing heavily.

“Don’t worry, I’m OK, Gordon!” she said, as she climbed down from him -not that she wouldn’t have minded staying a little more like that, but even she was a bit shy sometimes...- and stretched her arms, now in safe ground once again. “Thanks to you, of course! Gordon Freeman saved my life! What a legend. Though I guess you’re used to hearing that, huh?”

He just stared and smiled akwardly. He was really worried. Oh no. Ugh, now she felt really bad. If only she could rewind back what she said...

“Hey, it’s fine, it’s fine. You got me at the nick of time. Don’t worry.”

Gordon nodded, but his face was still concerned.

“H-hey, how about I help you with the greenhouse like I said?”

He nodded. She grabbed her tools and they put their minds and hands to work.

...

“You know what we should plant? Chili peppers. There’s this guy down the street, he was from City 9, I mean, Mexico, before they sent him here... He makes damn good tacos. He would be so happy to get his ingredients from here. Pretty sure they could grow in the greenhouse. It’s a good thing so many people brought their recipes and such here. Now that we have lots of seeds once again, things here might get a lot more tasty...”

The spring sun was setting in the horizon. While the reconstructed building wasn’t very tall, most of the city could be seen from there. Scattered here and there, there were neighboroods -those that have been deemed safe- turning on their lights. Most houses had patches of green on their roofs; some parks and gardens were already having flowers. And beyond them, in the center, the twisted alien metal of the ruins of the Citadel still stood, mostly out of inertia, as nobody could be able to remove it. It was part of the city now, in a way.

Gordon and Alyx were sitting -at a safe distance from the edge- in the roof of the building, with a brand new greenhouse behind them. A couple of bottles of cold water, scattered tools, and some pigeons kept them company.

“...I mean, I didn’t have much to choose when I grew up, with, you know, the alien invasion and the Combine regime and all, but I miss some good ol’ homemade food every now and then, you know? I’m sure you have some favorite foods you miss from the old times, too.”

He just nodded, looking at the sunset.

Alyx looked at him, and then again at the city horizon.

She sighed.

“Are you still mad?” She finally asked, softly, looking at her feet.

Gordon took quite a while to answer. She wasn’t worried about that; he always did. What she was worried about was the answer.

“...I’m not mad...”

Well, off to a good start.

“...I was just worried you could get hurt. That’s all.”

“Sorry. I... I just wanted to have some fun. And I did! but... I Didn’t want to make you worry. Sorry. Won’t do it again.”

Gordon’s idea of fun was more about reading about new research or watching bad old sci-fi movies. But to be fair, making Alyx fly was a little fun, it really was!

But he still felt uneasy.

“You’re fine, after all. It was just a little scare. And it WAS a little fun.” He clarified, smiling. “It’s fine.” He said.

And then Gordon found her looking at him, her eyes drifting away from the sunset to him.

It was time for Alyx to think. She stayed silent for so long that Gordon became a little worried.

“I’m... I’m always fine with you.” She finally said, softly. “If I’m in danger, you always come to save me. And you can trust I’ll ALWAYS do the same for you, too. You’ve always saved me. And I’m so glad. I’m so gald you did. So I could be with you.” She looked away, blushing. It was as close as a confession she could get. Even if maybe it wasn’t the best time.

She glanced at Gordon for a second. He was blushing. She was sure he got what she meant. In a way, it only made her feel more embarrased.

Another silence.

“Alyx... I... Don’t want to save your life anymore.” What? Before she could say something, he continued. “That is not the life I want for you, or me. I want... to live my life with you.”

Alyx stared at him, her mouth open, her entire mind blank, only a soft, tingly warmth, one that she felt so many times, yet like never as before.

“Gordon...”

“I don’t mind a little adventure every now and then...” he uncharacteristically added. “But... I would like to live a quiet life right now.” He paused, as if couldn’t continue.

He was absolutely red.

She wanted to say so many things. In fact, she didn’t expect Gordon to say all of this, at once, even.

“I’ll... try to... give you less headaches, then.” she giggled. “But you better do your part too, I mean... I know you like jumping in portals and crawling in sewers, Doc. You aren’t as innocent as you look.” She giggled. It wasn’t even that funny. She just tried to make jokes to lighten the mood. And she was feeling extremely happy after all. “Sorry, stupid joke.” Gordon didn’t mind. He nodded and sighed, smiling.

“And I’m up for it every time. But I... Really want to live a nice life with you too. I think it’s time.” she finally said, her words becoming softer at the end.

She got closer to him and took his hand. It wasn’t the first time they held hands, but it often was in more dire circumstances. Today, there was just the spring breeze and the soft smell of garden earth.

Earth.

He held her hand back. Alyx got closer. And a little bold, again. As she liked.

She rested her head on his shoulder. Gordon was frozen. But still very warm.

“Hey. Dr. Freeman.” She whispered. “Do you mind if we kiss?”

She was surprised when he answered instantly.

“Not at all.”

They returned very late to Black Mesa East that night.

[thea-harman]

❝  I get so caught up in protecting the people I love that I forget to protect myself.  ❞

☽ The Wi☨ch is in The Details ☾

Name:  Thea Sophia Harman Age:  17 ( May ## ) Zodiac:  Taurus ( ♉ ) Gender:  Female ( ♀ ) Species:  Witch ( Daughter of Hellewise ) Clan: Hearth-Woman ( Harman(s) ) Parents: Daniel Avery ( father - deceased ) & Sophia Harman ( mother - deceased ) Relationships:  Blaise Harman (cousin), Edgith Harman (maternal grandmother), Naomi Flores (great great great great aunt), Eric Ross (soulmate) Extended Family: Redfern(s), Iliana Dominick (distant cousin), Gillian Lennox (unknown cousin), FC:  Olivia Holt ( x )

☽ Personality ☾

☑  caring, courageous, free-spirited ☒  emotional, self-destructive, quiet

☽ The Past ☾

Thea and Blaise grew up differently than most kids.  Being an only child born to Daniel Avery ( Witch ) and Sophia Harman ( Witch ).  However, when she was still very young, Thea and her cousin Blaise lost both their parents in a tragic ritual accident.  Inseparable as ever the girls are basically sisters.  Because of this, they grew up surrounded by witches often living with their different relatives, mostly due to the antics of Blaise.  Blaise was never happy in one place for too long.  Because of that, Thea got used to a life of always being on the move. Having been expelled from seven to eight different schools since they were freshmen.   

Her cousin would regularly get into trouble for taunting and playing with the local human boys and Thea would take the fall with her.  At their last school in New Hampshire, Blaise got a boy named Randy Marik to burn down the school gym for her, leading to her and Thea's expulsion.  They were then sent to live with Grandma Harman, their maternal grandmother.

☽ The Present ☾

Running out of relatives to take them in.  Thea is determined not to get expelled or any trouble this time, as she doesn’t want to disappoint Grandma Harman - or be sent to the Convent for misbehaving.  Beginning their new school, Lake Mead High.  Things go awry right from the moment she arrives at school, however.  Before she can even go inside, Thea hears a lot of fuss, after investigating she discovers that students are crowded around a snake.  Thea telepathically connects with the snake and tries to convince it to leave to avoid getting the snake or any students harmed.  However, her concentration is broken by the students throwing stones and a boy named Eric Ross.  The snake bit him but only they knew.  The two then carry the snake out to the wilderness.  Thea heals Eric without him noticing.  Using magic to heal the bite, though she tries to pass it off as the snake having missed its mark. When Blaise notices Thea possibly liking Eric, she intends to use Eric like all of her 'boy toys.'  To stop her, Thea summons an old witch, a forbidden spell. She learns later that because she did not create a ring around the summoning, the spirit got to lose.  Not wanting Blaise to get to Eric, Thea says she will use him. He takes her to the dance, but when one of Blaise's old toys shows up and causes drama the two left.  Eric took her to the animal clinic he volunteers at.  When Blaise's attempts to take Eric from Thea it fails, she eventually deduces that Eric is her soulmate, but this gives her nothing but grief, due to Eric being human and therefore forbidden to her. 

Eric also takes Thea to the gym, where the Halloween dance is set up.  The theme consists of old witch hangings and torture methods.  Disgusted with it Thea had Eric get a camera so that they can write a complaint in the school newspaper.  While he is gone, Thea discovers the body of Kevin Imamura - a boy Blaise was toying with - is found strangled and hung with witch dummies.  Connecting the dots, Thea realizes that the murder was committed by the spirit she set to lose.  A witch victim of torture in the olden days, who was forced to watch her family die before she did.  Thea realizes that the spirit will attack again on Halloween.  Eric also connects the dots that Thea is a witch and demands that she let him help stop the spirit. Thea plans, with Eric’s help, to lure Suzanne’s spirit to a natural stone circle in the desert and send her back to the afterlife.  She intends to carry out the plan on the night of the Samhain celebrations.  Eric waits for her at the circle, whilst she attends the party.  Unfortunately, Thea, Blaise, and Dani are summoned by the Inner Circle and accused of performing forbidden spells.  Thea, realizing Eric and the human students at the high school Halloween dance is in danger, flees the house and drives to the circle, getting there just as Suzanne is about to kill Eric. 

With Eric's help, Thea prepares the ritual and sets it in motion. Suzanne's spirit is strong and tries to attack Thea, but she calls upon her "power as a daughter of Hellewise" - allegedly something no witch has done before - and finally gains the strength to send Suzanne back beyond the veil.  Together they re imprison the spirit, just as all of the witches arrive.  Now knowing that Thea is in love with a human, the witches decide to make them both lose their memories rather than killing them.  Eric and Thea are given a forgetting brew.  However, when drinking it, Thea realizes that it is just tea and that Blaise is letting her keep her memories.  After escorting Thea and her soulmate outside, Blaise - bid them farewell.  Thea had an emotional goodbye with her sister Blaise and Aradia suggests she and Eric seek out Circle Daybreak, where they might be accepted.  Fearing for their life she and Eric fled in his jeep but they never reached their destination to Circle Daybreak headquarters like they planned.  Engulfed in a sudden flash of light there whole worlds changed.

☽ The Current Story ☾

Now?  Thea and Blaise’s story is on a twisted re-peat but Thea has no recollection of of what had happened.  Just that where her story began.  With them running out of relatives to take them in.  Thea herself is determined not to get expelled or in any trouble whatsoever this time, as she doesn’t want to dissapoint Grandma Harman - or be sent to the Convent for misbehaving.  Beginning thier new life in browning harbor, massachusetts in a small town.

Timeline—

2019

( Sept. 24th )  Arrived at Browning Harbor Massachusetts to live with their Grandma Harman.

☽ Abilities ☾

☽ Basic Powers ☾ 》Spell Casting: Thea has the power to cast Spells. 》Potion making: She also can make magical potions. 》Cartomancy:  Tarot reading doesn’t have the power to change future events, but it can help anticipate them.  》Sigil Creation: Thea can inscribe or paint a symbol that’s considered to have magical power.   ☽ Individual Powers ☾ 》Advanced Telekinesis ► Thea can control and manipulate the movement of objects and persons through mental influence. 》Telepathy ► Thea has the power to hear the thoughts and read the minds of another person. 》Electrokinesis ► Thea can create, shape, and manipulate electricity. 》Advanced Geokinesis ► Thea can create, shape and manipulate earth and `earthen` elements. 》Hydrokinesis/Cryokinesis ► Thea can create, shape, and manipulate water, ice, and cold.. 》Pain Infliction ► Thea has the ability to inflict great pain onto a person by causing their blood vessels to burst and thus giving them multiple aneurysms 》Advanced Healing ► Thea can heal minor wounds such as poisons, cuts, bruises, and light burns.  Along with healing external wounds, including fractured bones and deeper burns, disregarding of severity.  Lost limbs can be re-attached.  Minor damaged internal organs may heal, but more severity may be beyond repair and may take more time to heal.

[24hrfilm]

AMERICAN BEAUTY

Kinda good, but kinda not.

Let me start this review by saying that I didn’t like American Beauty. I had heard of so many people raving about this movie and felt rather dissapointed after watching it. I didn’t feel ‘enlightened’ as people said I would. I felt icky and needed a snack. That was it. 

American Beauty is one of those films that is on pretty much every ‘20 MOVIES YOU MUST WATCH BEFORE THE EARTH IMPLODES AND EVERYTHING GOES TO HELL’ list. However, I never got around watching it. The few screencaps I’d seen were not cinematographically mind-blowing (except for the flower scene, I guess that one was pretty impressing. And, of course, as a teenage girl who’s film repertoire consists of romantic comedies, coming of age films, and maybe a few psychological drama’s (a rare find in my film collection), I was not immediately attracted to this comedy/drama.

American Beauty tells us the story of Lester Burnham, a middle aged, white male unhappily married to his tense wife. The couple has one daughter, Jane, who is pretty much the prototype of what society thinks of as a Troubled Teenage Girl. Lester feels as though he’s in a constant trance, and is indifferent to his wife’s words or his daughter’s attitude. Tired of being stuck in his rut, Lester decides to throw his life around when he gets a crush on Jane’s best friend. The daily life of the Burnham changes drastically as Lester starts working out and smoking weed, stops tolerating his wife’s constant stream of insults. Throughout the story, more characters get involved, including the new neighbours, a conservative, radical navy seal and his son, a teenage rebel with drug issues. 

First off, I want to talk about the film’s lead role, which is played by Kevin Spacey. Kevin Spacey has been accused of sexual misconduct and sexual advances towards young boys over 15 times, even way before the rise of the #metoo-movement. Kevin Spacey plays the role of a middle-aged man constantly objectifying a teenage girl. Even though he’s playing a character, I can’t help but feel extra uncomfortable watching the film. Whether artists/actors are detached from their work is an ongoing controversial topic. I’m not sure whether this sexual misconduct also happened on the set of American Beauty, but I do want to acknowledge the fact that he is not someone that I want to support, and I can’t write a review without calling that out first.

So, what are my likes and dislikes of the film?

An exceptionally strong asset of this film is the character development. Every character is very thought through and contains many different layers, just like us humans. Their actions are often inexplicable (I’m talking to you Lester, what the fuck were you doing man) and almost all of the characters undergo a big or small evolution. I was especially intrigued by the neighbours and their family dynamic. The navy seal is both abusive, but strangely loving, his wife looks like she’s in a constant state of shock, probably caused by the abusive nature of her husband. The Boy Next Door is a troubled teenager who spends his days secretly filming the Burnhams’ everyday life. It is revealed that he spent a few years in a mental hospital due to a drug addiction. He now deals in secret, because his violent father cannot find out that he still uses drugs. The way these characters are portrayed is extremely interesting.

I must admit that I was slightly dissapointed by the cinematography. The iconic scene with the roses and the girl was okay, but the remaining scenes were pretty unexceptional. 

American Beauty starts off easily and slowly progresses, then rapidly shifts into a thriller like-ending. I think the storyline is interesting, as it depicts lust, dreams, the mundane and the exceptional, the American Dream and love in its many different shapes and sizes. The film revolves around the definition of ‘normal’, and how it’s something very superficial and abstract. And while these are interesting themes to explore, the way it was done made me feel uncomfortable. I know what you’re going to say, “ITS SUPPOSED TO MAKE YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE YOU DUMB FUCK”, but I don’t think it even works in that sense. I’ve felt uncomfortable and still liked a movie, and this is different, especially being a teenage girl myself and having to deal with the systemic sexism and sexualization rooted into society. Using those struggles for your “grand” story about the suburban American male just doesn’t sit right with me.

[rogers-senpai]

The Analysis of the Progression of Jonerys and Why the Truth Won’t Break Them PART 3

PART 1 HERE

Why did he bend the knee? Because he saw her for what she is. Because she risked everything to save some few morons’ lives. Because he knows she is different. Because he believes in her. Her face was priceless. Bacause she knows he is not bending bacause he has to, but because he wants to. Hearing her say “I hope I deserve it” after she saved his life, lost her dragon, gave him everything he wanted, abandoning her Iron Throne mission, was amazing. Dark Dany, huh?

When she sees the way he looks at her, after he tugs at ther hand, not wanting to let go, she is almost scared, definitely shaken. Why? Doesn’t she love him? Well, while she could deal with her feelings if she knew they weren’t mutual, what can she do when she sees they are? She can’t ignore it, but should she go for it? She doesn’t know yet. When she slips his hand out of his, he is clearly dissapointed, did he misread all the signs? Rejection is a bitch. Then she ends the conversation and he awkwardly pretends to go to sleep while she leaves, clearly conflicted. He turns his head when comes out, and sighs once she is away. With the apocalypse coming, being in love, caring for someone is not good, he knows that, but what can he do?

I’ve seen it speculated that between episode 6 and 7, there was a few weeks break, which is possible. They had to return to Dragonstone, let Jon recover and Dany looks much better in the finale - she had to have had some time to mourn, probably alone. So if we think that they haven’t seen each other for so long, the scene when Jon  immediately stands up when he hears the dragons, seems much more meaningful. He is reminded again how badass she is, especially since she has just lost her child and she is as strong and confident as before.

In behind the scenes material we see that he waits for her to be seated, before taking his place himself, which we didn’t see in the episode because of the different camera angle. A sign of respect.

And then Jon makes his loyalty public, their theme playing right after. He keeps his loyalty, even though doing so meant him losing a chance for Cersei helping him and put Dany’s help under a question mark. Could she go North with Cersei waiting to take everything Dany has gained? But he does it, and he doesn’t lie either. Dany is clearly shocked and turned on by this, can you blame her?

Their talk scene was the first talk alone we were shown after the scene in which me made his feelings clear for her to see, after they realized they don’t want to fight it and you can see the difference in how they speak and behave. While anyone else would scream at him for his actions, but she tells him she respects what he did. The talk about Targaryen dynasty was the first time we saw her speak to anyone of the sad fate of her family. Jon is not only intrigued with High Valyrian, he looks interested during the talk of dragons locked up and it being the end for the Targaryens. And he tells her that her family hasn’t seen its end. All that in the context of them being the only Targaryens is so powerful. And the talk of babies again. He is the first to ever question the curse, Daario never did. And then he made her laugh, when did we last see that with any man? Was it Barristan? When did Daario make her laugh last?

When Tyrion comes back, they walk together, the same pace, which is something that happens unconciously when you are in love with someone, when you consider them your equal. They stop to stand very close to each other, despite there being so much room besides them. They are already behaving like a couple.

During the meeting, we are shown shots of people around them, Jorah, Tyrion, Grey Worm, Theon, and Davos in the background, and considering the context, it’s obvious they all know what’s going on, what “sailing together” really means. I also saw some antis question why he hadn’t made his move before the meeting with Cersei or any other time. Which is stupid. Before the meeting with Cersei, he was recovering and she was grieving and still unsure about what to do about him. Their talk scene after Tyrion goes to talk to Cersei, is the first time they’ve been alone since the boat scene for all we know. Then they go to Dragonstone, which is not a long way from King’s Landing and immediately plan to leave for Winterfell. When was he supposed to do anything? He used the first chance he got - the cruise to Winterfell, so he makes sure she is on that damn boat.

Their sex scene is sometimes hated on, as not romantic. Which is bullshit. It was short, yes. But the stares they shared before he entered the cabin and while he was closing the door? Their own theme, considered by many as the most beautuful and romantic theme playing in its entirety in the background? The way she was touching his stomach and chest? They way he was caressing her hair and face? The way Jon Snow dominated Daenerys Stormborn in the bedroom? When he licked her? The way he  sighed “yeah” after being inside fer for two seconds? The way their mouths flew open? The way they stopped, just to look at each other, gazing at each other, as if thinking that this is it, this is what they’ve been missing and searching for since the beginning?

5. WHY THE TRUTH WON’T BREAK THEM

Jon is Ned Stark’s son, antis say, he won’t be with his aunt. Well yes, Jon is Ned Stark’s son, and Ned is his father’s son. And guess who Ned’s father married and had kids with? His cousin. And the whole percentage thing some try to pull out is ridiculous. You think GRRM, who has made Targaryen sibling relationships romantic and happy, will not make Jon and Dany be together when they share less DNA than that? Also EVERY house in Westeros has married their relatives, other than siblings and parent-child so many times. Tywin “No Disgrace For The Family Name, My Kids Don’t Do Incest” Lannister married his cousin, showing that in Westeros only siblings and parent-child marriages are considered a NO NO, since when you grow up together there is a biological effect that makes it impossible to fall in love with each other if you are mentally healthy. Also Robert in additional GoT material said that maybe he shouldn’t have killed Targaryen babies, but they were still born of incest, and then he married Cersei - a product of two cousins. Incest is only mental in Westeros, they don’t care about any percentage. There was even a Stark marriage between an aunt and nephew. There would probably be more of those if aunts weren’t usually much older than nephews.

And the fact that GRRM didn’t make Jon and Dany - the last members of a house which practices incest much more than any other- grow up together, or meet each other knowing, making them not have the growing up together gross thing, says a lot. That and all their parallels and foreshadows which are in a link somewhere in the first part, the fact he said they were the point of the series?

However hard you try to say GRRM shows incest in a bad light, it is not true. He made what we consider to be incestual relationship romantic. Some of the Targaryens, Tywin and his cousin-wife and such.

If we are right, Dany is pregnant. What will make Jon turn away from her if she is? They are already in love, and with all the points I made, I’ll be sleeping calmly.

[diary-of-an-aries]

2019 prediction - angeloracle

January - you are going to start the year by doing something really practical, nurturing and down to earth. I can see you spending time with friends and family but also working towards abundance and prosperity. You are going to have everything under control, but you can't forget to take some time for yourself. It is going to be important for you to just relax and be by yourself, instead of constantly focusing on work and other people. Your lucky day/number for January is 8 and 10.

February - In February you might be starting some sort of a new healthy habit or restricting yourself in some way. But this is going to be very positive change and it will make you very happy and satisfied. You are going to feel as everything is working out for you and you are truly content. Lucky day/number is 14 and 26.

March - In March, you will have to have a closure of some sort. There might be an event happening, that could make you feel like a failure, but you have to realize, that this is just a sign for you to have a new and much better beginning. There will be something unfinished, that you need to work on. The lesson you need to learn this month is, that you have to follow your dreams in order to be truly happy. Stop depending on others and do what feels right, you are amazing and can do whatever you set your mind to! A lot of things will have to do something with the number 10 (completion, ending).

April - April will be a very happy month for you. After march, you will finally get the happy ending in a situation that you've always wanted. A lot of positive things will happen, so be open to receive. If there is something you have been wanting for a while, it will probably appear this month! A reward after all your hard work is coming.

May - In May, you really have to listen to your intuition. You will be getting a lot of messages this months and if you focus and do what your intuition is guiding you to do, you will be rewarded with abundance and prosperity. Also, you have to communicate clearly with everyone in order to get where you want to. Communicate your desires and stand up for yourself. Lucky numbers for this months are 3 and 4.

June - You might be traveling somewhere in June! If not, you will be experiencing adventure outside and be spending a lot of time in nature. You will start being fully present and enjoying every second of your life. In June, you will be having a lot of fun and you'll just live in the moment! There could also be a friend/family member experiencing all of this with you, could be a fire sign or have a lot of fire in their chart.

July - In July, you will be feeling super confident and excited. There might be a lot of celebrations/parties happening or you will just be spending time with tons of friends and having a great time. This month is going to be very similar to June but you might be even more excited! There could also be a lot of abundance coming your way in July! Lucky number is 8.

August - This month you are going to experience a lot of success. This is going to be connected to creativity, so wherever is creativity connected to your life, in this area you will experience a huge amount of luck in August. If any opportunities come your way this month, be sure to take them and make the best of them!

September - For this month, one of the cards that I've pulled, is Music, so maybe you are doing something that relates to music? Could be dancing, singing, anything... If not, music will play some sort of role this month. There will be a new person or a message coming in regarding your work/school and like I said, it could somehow relate to music. I hope this makes sense lol. You are also going to be very relaxed this month and ready for any challenge that comes your way.

October - You will have to balance your masculine energy this month. There might be a situation requiring you to be very generous but also patient. By being patient, you will learn whats right for you and that not everything was as it seemed before. Try to look at the positive side of all situations and problems that arrive and remember that you can always learn from everything.

November - This month is going to be exciting again! I can see a lot of love and feelings and manifestations coming towards you. You are going to feel so so excited and overwhelmed with positive emotions. Your dreams will be coming true and you will be feeling super intuitive and you will teach others through your experiences. Lucky number is 2.

December - The first card that I got for you in January was the Queen of Pentacles and the last card I got for December is the King of Pentacles. I love this so much hahah. Basically you will start your year as a strong and down to earth, abundant person and you will end it that way. You will feel super proud of yourself. There will be a great feeling of completion, along with feeling healed and satisfied. You will be able to look back at the strong foundation that you have build for yourself and see that you did an amazing job.

[So I feel like this year will be absolutely amazing for you, especially when seeing the ending of 2019, I can tell that you are going to be proud of yourself. The main theme for you is going to be creativity, which is funny, because 2019 in numerology is the universal year number 3, which is also the number of creativity. I with you the best and I hope all of your dreams come true! Good luck and thank you for getting a reading from me💗]

+ “There could be some problems regarding relationship with your friends and also someone could possibly backstab you or dissapoint you in march but I didnt receive any other negative messages, so I think that means that you should focus on the positivity:)”

[gaming-with-aisy]

Welcome to Day 1 of the Pokémon Sun - Casual Nuzlocke diary!

What are the Nuzlocke Rules for this playthrough ? 1. Any Pokémon that faints is considered dead, and must be released or put in the Pokémon Storage System permanently. (Stored for me going to the holiday islands =D for retirement!!) 2. The player may only catch the first Pokémon encountered in each area, and none else. If the first Pokémon encountered faints or flees, there are no second chances.Addition - I add the duplicate rule. I get 5 tries so I won’t catch multiple of the same Pokémon. 3. Nickname Pokémon for bonding purposes. 4. Black out / White out means game over Aka the basic Nuzlocke rules, as stated it’s a casual Nuzlocke. I have decided to go with a naming theme!  All my caught babies will be named after Dark Souls NPC’s and/or Bosses.

My partner in crime in this nuzlocke was picked by my best friend Seth. I decided due to a picture I found on the internet to call him Solaire after the Sun Bro of Dark Souls 1. And this is how I kinda rolled into my naming theme. Going through the basic story progression nothing really happens that is very intresting. I caught Mildred the Pikipek and in the Trainer Schools high grass I caught Siegmeyer the Magnemite. 

The moment I got the chance I got my hair changed, was slightly dissapointed the hairstyle I wanted is a post game one. But the one I got now is working out aswell. After training and catching Irena the Pichu I went for Ilima who, suprised me. Yungoos was taken out thanks to Mildred rather fast but when Smeargle came on the field and the tackle showed to be rather strong I switched Mildred out for Siegmeyer. Little did I know it had ember…

Luckely Siegmeyer was already at level 11 and when Ember hit it didn’t kill him and the hit after dealed with the Smeargle. We defeated Ilima and I moved on. Caught myself some more Pokémon and got myself up to route 2, healed up and sadly my day of playing ended here as I triggered the cutscene and saved inside my first trial!

Pokémon on my team :

Yuria the Misdreavus Gender : F Level : 11 Nature : Lax Caught at : Hau’oli Cemetery

Siegmeyer the Magnemite Gender : None Level : 12 Nature : Calm Caught at : Trainer School ( But states Route 1)

Mildred the Pikipek Gender : F Level : 12 Nature : Bashful Caught at : Route 1

Solaire the Rowlet Gender : M Level : 12 Nature : Careful Caught at : Iki Town

I do have a question, it seems certain areas do get the little screen with the name like the trainer school but are counted as Route 1. I only just saw this and haven’t realised this while playing. Now i’m wondering how to deal with this in the future. So my question for those reaching this far down in the post, what would you do?