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#the solution is only having to work for 10 hours a week max
Student schedule was the fucking best. I’d walk max. 10 mins away from my house. Get my mind blown open by smart people for an hour. Fuck around for the rest of the day letting my mind chew over what I learned. Walk into town if I feel like it go to H&M if I feel like it go to a cafe if I feel like it. Get fresh bread and eat it on the walk home if I fucking feel like it dude. Get home there are people my age with free time in my house, spend hours getting ready for a night out, immediately abandon them and have fun dancing to shit music. God damn I miss that.
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why-the-heck-not · 9 months
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Hi! I've been a follower for some time now and I always see your posts about trying to be productive and consistent. I'm a student who's studying fully online, and because I'm only doing my thesis, I spend all my time to myself, it gets really lonely, and I feel somehow disconnected with the work and end up not doing it at all. Do you have any tips? Also, I really enjoy your updates!
Hii! I truly get you, I’ve been doing like 95% of my studies at home myself too. Got the same feelings, so I don’t rly have a solid solution, but libraries help a lot. There are other ppl there so it’s not so lonely, and less distractions and something abt going home around the same time other ppl are going home from their jobs makes me feel a lot more like I’m actually in this society/world etc.
Ideal would be to have like a routine of going to do ur studies somewhere and coming back home after u’ve done ur things for the day. (I don’t follow this but would love to and I think it would really help; did do that in january for like a week and it was nice & I felt like a real person (but then the winter got to me lol)).
Also other things that have helped a bit:
Leaving the apartment every day, no matter where or for how long. Just gotta get outside
Routines <3 a sleeping schedule <3 makes things feel a lot less like a mess. (especially a solid morning routine is very important I think)
Going to the gym in the morning (bc gets u out of the house for a decent amount of time first thing so then the threshold of leaving somewhere later on the day is smaller)
Purposely going in places when it’s the 5-6pm rush hours (mainly grocery store bc like where else would I go) even tho it sort of sucks. But I used to avoid those and then realized I’d been seeing like maybe max 10 ppl per week and felt insane, like in an apocalyptic movie sort of way. Just try to get urself to places where there’s other ppl lol (except a warning: friday & saturday evenings? Stay inside lmao, there’s only friendgroups etc. out, and that makes it feel very lonely (at least that’s my experience lol))
Podcasts and music and tvshows and books all the time lol drown out the lonely (not maybe the healthiest but better than a social media doom scroll bc that just makes it feel like u’re the only one living like this, and u’re not)
Walks !!! Walks make everything better always. Feel sad? Frustrated or confused about anything ?Not fully there? Walk it out !! (Also music/podcast during the walk and it’s super chill)
Caffeine bc dopamine & serotonin (nothing a cup of coffee wouldn’t solve)
Putting on actual clothes you could to public places with every morning, even if u aren’t planning on going anywhere rly anytime soon
Live in delusion; u’re not ”studying while feeling lonely”, you’re now the obsessed genius who has no time for anything/anyone else character trope
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rhlgull1331 · 1 year
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A Few Pro Wrestling Matches from 2022 (in chronological order) ((this post is long , sorry))
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{4.75 stars & The Beautiful Excess award}
Just 3 weeks after having a legitimately perfect 1-hour match, they have to follow it up with something that matches their previous brilliance without being too similar. The easy solution was to further the game of one-upmanship present in their first encounter but with half the length. Main difference here is that the challenge Danielson presented to Adam Page went from "can you keep up with me, champ?" to "can you handle me headbutting you for 10 actual minutes?" Yeah, it's probably not a great idea for Bryan Danielson, owner of prowres' most valuable brain since Bobby Heenan, to engage in vicious head-based offense... but I guess he was fine. Who are we to question The American Dolphin?
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{4.5 stars & The Overcoming All Odds award}
Adam Page was AEW's best world champion and I doubt I'll change my mind until we see a champion come out on top in a manner as bonkers as this. You've probably seen a few deathmatches this year? I've only seen a few throughout the year. No single ultraviolent spot made me react the way Adam Page bouncing off the stairs and landing chin first against the ring post made me react. One thing I've slightly overlooked is how Lance Archer, for one more night, got to be a fucking star. It's a shame he didn't carry this momentum for much of the year.
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{4.25 stars & The King's Road Triumph award}
When Y2J lost the AEW title in 2020 it seemed to me that he would be closing the in-ring chapter of his career within 2 or 3 years. I was verrry wrong. He's had the best prowres year of his life as far as I'm concerned. I have a cynical tendency to hold Chris Jericho to the standards that both he and his fans insist he is at. A fair 75% of the time, he misses the mark that I would expect from a candidate for 'Greatest Of All Time'. This is one of the exceptions where he really hit a home run. The aforementioned cynic in me wants to hand it ALL to Eddie Kingston, but that wouldn't be fair. Jericho helped set up the dramatic heights of the bout just as much as Kingston helped in executing them. It was one of the closest 'duo-minded' matches you could see all year. I imagine both guys shared only a quick glance before walking to the ring, both knowing exactly how the match was gonna go.
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{5 stars & The Most Cathartic award}
I simply cannot do this justice in such few words. The feud between Punk and MJF was magical television. Every week was a highlight of ALL wrestlingI watched this year. Punk's promo where he invites Max to be. his. valentine. Followed of course by Friedman's promo where he reveals his 'origin story' of sorts, which is the undisputed best promo he's ever done. The feud was nothing too complex in the grand scheme of things, it's a grizzled veteran vs confident young guy story at its core... But it means a lot more to a gal like me who knows CM Punk's history. Someone who watched Punk as a kid and began to wonder what he was doing before he was in WWE. Learning about Punk's pre-WWE days invited me to find more Ring Of Honor matches online which inevitably led me to everything they had to offer. I found more about the American indies, I found New Japan and Pro Wrestling NOAH, I found my niche. And I can personally trace it all back to the time I learned that CM Punk pinned Austin Aries and then told a fable about an old man and a snake.
.....
The match was pretty good too!
Acute satisfaction came from seeing MJF finally get his comeuppance by way of a flatback bump into thumbtacks. Thanks Wardlow, you sexy man!
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{4.25 stars & The Better Than BOLA award}
(No, i didn't only watch AEW this year) Every couple of years in pro wrestling you find that one. The one who just ticks all the boxes. "Speedball" Mike Bailey is that one for me. They just know how it all works. Couple them with someone who also happens to tick all those boxes and you get this match. These two had had a match for 2022's Battle of Los Angeles tournament, which was fine but I felt it went a bit longer than needed. Well I thought it did, but it turns out this match here is only 4 minutes shorter than their PWG match. The difference is night and day, although some of the moments are carried directly from that initial match. It's just a much better execution for the most part.
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{4.5 stars & The Comedy Bullshit Award}
I love Jackass. I love Sami Zayn. You'd expect this to be an incompatible pairing, considering how explicit all of Jackass' content is, but the easy workaround is to have this match work as a straightforward comedy match rather than anything exceedingly violent. Let's not kid ourselves now, in what world would it be a good idea for Johnny Knoxville to have a legitimate pro wrestling match? He's had more concussions than Mick Foley. The action is as competent as a WWE prop-comedy scene could've been. If it were Johnny Knoxville with anybody else then it wouldn't be on the list. Samuel Zayn is the patron saint of giving a hundred and ten percent.
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{4.25 stars & The Bleedin' Gums award}
There are few ways to genuinely shine on TV when you've come up through the independents, even in AEW's world. Most of the time, crowds are familiar enough with a talent so that they don't have to establish much more about themselves that isn't able to be seen online. Wheeler YUTA took things a step forward by not resting on his laurels and instead finding a new way to stand out. In this case, he gets promptly massacred by Jon Moxley. The amount of blood that flows from YUTA's head could fill a pool. The one moment where he's face-up on the outside, face fully coloured in red, the money shot for Wheeler if there could've been one. Mox don't slouch either, he puts up one of his best performances all year and that's saying a lot. The speed when he starts hitting those Hammer&Anvil Elbows is remarkable.
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{4.25 stars & The Denzel Washington award}
This fight is a cult underground jazz record that was only on vinyl for 20 years and then inexplicably found its way to streaming after some weirdo celebrity found it and loved it. I feel it aimless to analyse this match as a match, since it's portrayed as a gang fight that just so happens to be in front of a crowd. We get a lot of wild moments throughout, my personal favourite being when Danny Garcia hits a Piledriver onto Ortiz or Santana from the apron onto stairs immediately after J.R says "Stop posing to the crowd, nobody's looking!" I could list off all the cool moments but I'm more inclined to praise Eddie Kingston for a bit. How is it possible for someone to feel so genuine when they are trying to light a man on fire while covered head to toe in another man's blood? I'd like to stop for another second to show love to the owner of that blood, "Daddy Magic" Matt Menard. This fuckin guy bled like a Funk Brother and then covered himself in mustard with those cuts still fresh. What a madman.
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{4.75 stars & The Best Sequel award}
yeahyeahyeah I know The Briscoes ain't the most jam-up guys in prowres, but they can still craft a fantastic match when they need to. FTR are unfortunately in this negative space with fans right now, because Dax Harwood (FTR Bald) is being outspoken about things that aren't exactly popular or fun to talk about. I don't know why Cash Wheeler (FTR Not Bald) is getting flack too but that's only because I imagine when Dax isn't around him, he de-spawns from the area like a video game NPC. My point is that these two teams made some magic with this match despite their inherent flaws as teams and as personalities. Perhaps a bit of length could be cut and perhaps a hope spot or two could be removed, but dammit this is the kind of pulpy, high-stakes tag team wrestling I adore. Plus I just love the 2/3 Falls stipulation. That was a big bonus for me. (btw their first and third matches are great too but i like this one more)
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{4.5 stars & The Marvel Movie award}
This match was unstable. (that's a joke) Imagine the unsubtle and overproduced fighting in a Marvel Movie action scene and now imagine that being applied within the confines of a wrestling ring and voila you have this match. WWE have this weird thing where they have main events for the world title feel complacent in their content. Roman is able to have a good/watchable match but only when he's with someone that he's wrestled before. He and Brock "Punches Moons Into Smaller Moons" Lesnar have had some stinkin' rotten no-good bouts before, just look at their match at WrestleMania this year! There was no optimism from me nor my pals, whom I watched SummerSlam with, that this match would be worth a damn. ... But then the tractor came out and the match shot from a solid 3.5 star snooze right to a 4.25 classic. ...... Then Austin Theory (yuck) got his SHIT ROCKED and it went up another quarter. Sometimes it's worth giving the benefit of the doubt. You may just turn the night around in your favour.
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{4.25 stars & Loud As F**K award}
I knew this match was good when Starlight Kid no-sold a Butterfly Suplex from the top and I had no qualms about it. This match is a sleeper hit that comes right in the middle of a round robin tournament where nobody expects it. Fast-paced and hard-hitting, two very common attributes for this promotion's best matches but quite bloody apt in this case. There's one bit where I swear Giulia's elbow pops out of place with how hard she swung it at SLK's jaw. It's no wonder both these wrestlers are my favs in all of STARDOM when they're this captivating in such a "throwaway" match during a Round Robin tournament.
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{4.25 stars & The Welsh Irish Pride award} This match is how to show you appreciation to the long-time star in Sheamus. Let him wrestle someone with no restrictions. Nothing but the hardest of hits and amplest of steps taken to get those hits in. This match is subtle for the longest time, waiting for a right moment for Gunther to get ruthless. If this were to be Big Gunth vs anybody else then it would probably open with one of his trademark CHOPS (in all caps), but they play it coy and they don't have Gunther hit Sheamus with a CHOP until a good few minutes in. And only from there do things escalate. The crowning moment being when Sheamus drops Gunther with the High Cross. A move that is always in Sheamus' moveset in the video games but one i've not seen him use since maybe 2011. If Sheamus' legend status in WWE was in question before this match, then that debate was taken out back and kicked up the backside after the crowd's standing ovation.
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{4.5 stars & The Bloody Tears award}
When it comes to deathmatches, I like to see men willingly bleed in pursuit of money and glory. Jun Kasai is one such man who has legitimately done that for 20 years. Look at his back and you'll see the shell of a tortoise. El Desperado is a New Japan star who I, admittedly, held in little regard beforehand but now i think i want to see this man succeed in every way possible. Jun Kasai is comparable only to a decrepit deity with aspirations for mayhem and reverence for suffering. He takes all the worst ideas for wrestling moves and then makes them more brutal, for a random example imagine a Canadian Destroyer. Right, you've seen one of those before? Picture that move off the top rope now. "Actually let's amp it up a bit and let's add a Double Underhook so then Despy can't protect his head on impact." Oh! Okay then Mr. Kasai. "Let's also add a stack of chairs so the aforementioned impact is a smidge more painful." Whatever you say! "That ain't the end of the match by the way." Fine by me! Don't stab me, sir!! It's a madman's match for sure. It also gets a bit sentimental during the end-match promo, but i must declare that I was a little distracted that point because i had seen the best deathmatch of my damn life. ------------- That's my list! I hope you'll want to watch some wrestling now. - Rhlgull
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fvckyouimaprophet · 2 years
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I am so wildly burned out, more than I've been in a long time. maybe ever? i haven’t had a proper vacation since the fall of 2021 because all the time off in 2022 has been for my family which is very much stressful and not a vacation. i did not take a single vacation for me or to do anything with my partner since september 2021, which feel so, so far away.
and then this break, when i was supposed to have a few days to relax, i ended up with some sort of bug situation (which i’m allergic to), have had to jump around to doctors and dermatologists to make sure i’m not breaking out in hives with fever/chills, pack up my entire goddamn apartment so they can do treatments, lost all my credit/debit cards and id, ended up with a multi-day migraine starting on christmas, and my anxiety has been so through the roof that i’m sleeping max 5 hours a night. usually more like 2-3.
and then on top of that, work has been so insane that i’m going to work the equivalent of probably 4 days worth when i only took 5 days of vacation. i already have worked over 10 hours today and yesterday and another 4 last week, and i’m probably only... halfway done with everything. but i have 8 days of pto left for this year that i didn’t even get to use, so like does it even really matter if it’s another 4 days worth?
i felt like i hit my wall hard back in november (after probably hitting my wall a long time ago and suppressing it) when i had a giant mental breakdown and cried for like 5 hours straight. and things have only gotten worse.
i’m genuinely unsure how to keep going, and i don’t know what to do about it because it doesn’t feel like there is a solution.
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keymace · 5 months
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Key plays Fallout Shelter (summer 2020)
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So I decided to finally try Fallout Shelter before it disappears like the mobile gacha spinoff that it is. I originally planned to play only seven days, but kept playing (at a much slower pace) a bit longer. During the ten days I played, I managed to finish four questlines. In this article, I will relay my overall experience, review said quests, and then talk about some miscellaneous things.
My experience
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I started my vault, got my first two dwellers, and did the tutorial. So this is one of those games where everything you want done takes between 2 minutes and 2 days. Since I'm the kind of person who just stares at the screen and waits for things to happen, combined with bad luck with the Rush mechanic, stuff took even longer. Before the day ended, I found the Mysterious Stranger, got a Hardened Minigun, got the vault's first child, and made a lot of rooms, going to bed feeling satisfied despite the rocky parts.
On day 2, I open the game and completely ran out of all my resources. trying to Rush so I can get resources back only makes the situation worse, so my only solution is to scrap everything and make a better vault. After that, I completed a challenge that got me my first Mr. Handy which got my mood back up. I later also find a Pickaxe and a Gauss Rifle.
Day 3 also had a bad start. Basically right after I start the game, mole rats invade a far-off room with no dwellers close by, and the moles proceed to spread through the vault and almost kill everyone. I finally rescue Bottle and Cappy, whose questline I had started a day or two before, by the time the day ends, I also get invaded a few times by Feral Ghouls and Radscorpions, pitifully fighting back as I barely unlock nuclear reactors.
As if to mirror the previous day, the morning starts with Deathclaws attacking the vault. I fight them off, do quests and challenges, and find an Armor-Piercing Minigun.
Days 5 and 6 are somewhat uneventful compared to the ones before. I take it easy and play a bit more passively. I unlocked the garden and water purifier, found another Gauss Rifle, and got my first max level (50) dweller.
On the 7th day I got a Lunchbox to celebrate my first week. It had no rare items in it. I finished the Climbing the Ranks questline, and got Sarah Lyons as a reward. I managed to fully upgrade my weapon workshop, leaving me with no money, and reached 100 dwellers in the vault, achieving all the goals I had set for myself. Another cool thing that happened is I got my last legendary junk, completing that tab in my log.
I decided to keep playing because some parts were fun enough, and wanted to finish the two other questlines I had started. However, on day 9, I open the game and some kind of glitch happened, which made the cooldown for watching an ad for free stuff be 210 hours, and it also made challenges stop working at all.Day 10 ended, I finished Almost Human and Journey to the Center of Vaultopolis, and I am done with this game.
I originally planned to highlight my most valuable dwellers, but the glitch really destroyed all my motivation, so I'll talk about the quests I have done.
Quests
First off, I'll talk about the two one-off quests I've done. Getting Started is the tutorial quest, and there's nothing special about it. You just get in, kill a Glowing Radroach, and leave. This proves you’re somehow qualified to be the overseer. The only other one-off quest I did is Can't Stop The Signal, in which a raider is using a strange signal to control Radroaches, which is pretty interesting. I've also done a few daily/weekly quests as well as Random Encounter quests, but those aren't saved in the log for whatever reason, and I can't remember them well. Now for the questlines I have done:
Nabbed from Nuka-World
Raiders have kidnapped Bottle and Cappy, the mascots of Nuka-World! Obviously you have to go save them, because you love them so much. Also they're real living beings here. Along the way you come across a group of ghouls who you do not have to fight if you don't want to. That honestly surprised me, and I instinctively went with the peaceful option even if it meant less experience and and loot. After that, you get to the lair of a wastelander who was raising radscorpions, and on the way you kill her pet Glowy. You don;t have to fight her, and she directs you to the Nuka-Cola Factory, where Bottle and Cappy are being held. At the factory, the raider boss is defeated, and Bottle and Cappy are saved. After that, they visit the vault from time to time. Tapping on them when they dance will give caps, and sometimes Nuka-Cola Quantum.
I think the quest was alright. I did it first because it was a limited time quest. I'm not too big a fan of Bottle and Cappy, especially animated fluidly like that instead of being animatronics like in Fallout 4, they're really uncanny here. Again I was surprised that I could choose peace, and I like that one of the mobs was named, even if just in one dialogue.
Climbing the Ranks
So the Brotherhood of Steel thinks your vault would make for a great BoS outpost, but they need a little help at some factory and call for your help. Once you help them, they want to recruit you as a soldier, and ask you to help some more, though the quest descriptions describe it as "proving your Vault is good enough to be an outpost" despite the BoS being the ones asking to make it one. So you save the next team and become a Soldier and get sent to save another team. You do so but their leader was kidnapped and taken to the Nuka-Cola Plant, completely different from the Nuka-Cola Factory. You head there and save none other than Sarah Lyons! She joins your vault as a reward.
I started this questline because it was short, being only 4 quests. The inconsistencies with the quests descriptions and  dialogue bother me, but it doesn't really matter that much, and your vault being an outpost or you being a soldier have zero consequences on anything at all. Seeing Lyons was surprising. I don't really rememeber her much as a character, but I do remember that her Brotherhood is a faction I liked, as they're trying to help everyone. The last thing I have to say about this quest, though this applies to the whole game really, is that they made the female Power Armor look way more... girly for some reason, instead of it looking the same on male and female dwellers as it should.
Almost Human
The Railroad was trying to sneak some refugee synths close to your area but they got captured by raiders hired by the Institute. Now, them resorting to random people from the wastes is nothing new and happens as early as Fallout 3, but it's still strange. Anyways, this is a short and straightforward quest: You save Railroad agents and free the synths.
Once again, I started this one because it was short and I wanted to squeeze one last questline to write about before I was done playing. Really standard Railroad quest aside from being against raiders instead of synths. I quite like the reward though, a suit of T-45a power armor, which is basically a prototype made before the standard T-45d.
Journey to the Center of Vaultopolis
This is a long one, made out of 15 quests. I started it before Almost Human, but of course I finished Almost Human first. It begins when you find the journal of Paula Plumbkin, an overseer looking for the legendary Vaultopolis. You follow her steps along the wasteland, checking on vaults and rescuing people, stopping by a Super Duper Mart halfway to resupply, In there, you find another page of her journal, saying that Vault 525 is Vaultopolis, and they used a G.E.C.K. to make it so. You find the supposed location of the vault there, only to meet Paula Plumbkin, who was actually a raider all along. After you defeat her, you head to the real location of Vaultopolis. It's just a vault with nothing special. All Paula wanted to do was kill everyone and make the vault her base.
I liked the mystery this quest had at the start. You're just following a vault overseer looking for an utopia. Along the way she apparently got captured by feral ghouls who were saving up humans for meals, which is something smart that animals do but I wouldn't really think that feral ghouls would do that. Anyway, at the end it's revealed Paula was a raider and was leading you to her, which implies everything that happens, from her being captured by ghouls to a different Vault being attacked by named raiders was all made up by her in order to lead you to her which makes absolutely no sense in my opinion. All the people you visited before meeting her called her nice so they were all in on it? Or did she slowly become a raider as her adventure went on?She does say the wasteland "toughened her up" and the quest description calls her a wannabe raider, but again, that's all weird. The plot twist really surprised me until I thought about it a bit more, and overall the whole quest felt like a waste at the end.
That's it for the quests I've done. Before the glitch happened, I also started Horsemen of the Post-Apocalypse Part 1 which I also find quite intriguing and am tempted to continue to see how that turns out. That questline's three parts have 18 quests combines, making it the longest line in the game. Up next is random little bits I wanted to talk about.
Things unique to Fallout Shelter
As I've already noted before, you can get a never-before-seen prototype power armor in this game. It's not the only item like that. I did not want to cross-check every type of armor here, so I'll only highlight the Power Armors, as well as weapons and creatures.
First I want to talk about the creatures. All the monsters in the game are returning from previous games, except of course most named raiders and monsters. I met a few names raiders, mostly in the Journey to the Center of Vaultopolis, as well as a Glowing Radscorpion named Glowy. Most of the original creatures though are pets. There's a lot of new breeds of dogs and cats, and nearly all legendary pets are new named animals, with only some that are returning characters, like of course Dogmeat, though while most of them do not exactly match their appearance in previous games, at least their description does. Among the pets though is an animal brand new to the Fallout franchise: parrots. There are three different types of parrots with five legendary parrots.
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The other creature type I wanted to mention are simple wild animals. First off are rats that like to wander in your vault rooms when no one is in there. They are smaller than the rats seen in previous games, and dig into the ground when people get into the room. They are merely silhouettes though.
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The other type of wildlife you may come across are bats in caves. Those really surprised me! As far as I know, this is the first time bats appear in the franchise, though giant mutant bats were planned to appear in Black Isle's Fallout 3, AKA Van Buren. Unlike rats, bats are actually textured. Another creature in caves are insects that flock to floodlights.
Power Armors
As mentioned above, a few of the power armor models are unique to this game, because they wanted the armors to have tiers. For that purpose, a are the weakest, f the strongest, and d the middle ground. All d and f versions do appear in Fallout 4.
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T-45a is a prototype and T-51a are prototypes, while the description of T-60a makes it sound like it's just regular T-60. There is also a unique variant of T-60 worn by War from the Horsemen of the Post-Apocalypse. It is vastly superior to even T-60f but I don't know much about it yet. If I make another article about Fallout Shelter, I will talk about the rest of the unique pets and armors.
Unique Weapons
The game's weapons are mostly Falout 3 and 4 weapons, including the unique weapons, but there are a few new ones. The closest thing to fully original weapons are some of the melee weapons: The Pickaxe, and to a lesser extent, the Fire Hydrant Bat and Relentless Raider Sword.
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The Fallout franchise has had pickaxes before, as background objects, but this is the first time one can be a weapon, beating Fallout 76 to it. The Fire Hydrant Bat is a tiny version of the Super Mutant Behemoths' melee weapon. It has the potential to deal the most damage out of all weapons in the game. The Relentless Raider Sword is interestingly the only New Vegas-related thing in this game. It's shaped like a bumper sword, but appears to be a normal piece of metal instead of a bumper. Another noteworthy thing related to this weapon is that there was an unused weapon in the files using the Relentless Raider Sword’s appearance and the Sniper Rifle’s name, but its internal name was Bumper Sword. (source)
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The most interesting unique gun is Henrietta, a modified lever-action rifle held by Old Longfellow. He does not own this weapon in Fallout 4, nor there seem to be any traces of it in the game's files, and it is the only Fallout Shelter weapon to have visible mods. Here are the rest of the unique weapons that are only in this game:
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The Lone Wanderer, a 10mm referencing the Fallout 3 protagonist, the Red Rocket, a BB Gun referencing the in-universe gas station chain, the Magnetron 4000, a Gauss Rifle, the Railmaster, a Railway Rifle, the Farmer's Daughter, which may be a surprising reference to Fallout 2's Miria whom you are forced to marry, Mean Green Monster, a Plasma Rifle, the Lead Belcher, a minigun,
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Apotheosis, an Institute pistol, Technician's Revenge, a Junk Jet, Little Brother, a pipe pistol, Big Sister, a pipe rifle, and Dragon's Maw, a plasma thrower. Another weapon of note is Charon's shotgun, which is NPC-only in Fallout 3 but playable in Shelter. There is also a lot of half-implemented unique weapons, and the only actually working but unused weapon is Amata's Pistol, which is basically a Hardened 10mm pistol.
Afterword
After playing for ten days, I had a little fun. I'm still curious about the Horsemen of the Post-Apocalypse questline, but I'm done for now. I didn’t say anything about the music because I think it’s all from Fallout 4, which is fine. The graphics are good enough too. I don't really have anything else to add, so I'll end it here. Thank you for reading!
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juanita5418638 · 2 years
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Week 10 - The End
It is quite crazy to think this class has come to an end, each week was so interesting and immersive that it genuinely just flew by. Not only have I confirmed my love for industrial design through these exercises but I've gained so much essential knowledge that I will definitely look back at.
Through this course I've learnt the importance of reflection and self-evaluation as I am now able to explore my weaknesses and how to combat them in order to find a solution so to improve in the future. I've gone from making shaky lines with a felt tip pen to having a steadier hand and confidence when drawing lines without the assistance of a ruler or guide and my final drawings have never looked cleaner - they almost look printed.
Being new to 3D forms and software, the later weeks appeared intimidating at first glance but as I had learnt in my first weeks -patience is key. Rather than thinking about rushing to finish so I can upload my weekly post in record time, I allowed myself to (somewhat) forget about the deadline and instead focus on completing each step slowly as to avoid making a mistake. Although yes, this meant I spent a total of two hours just playing with the interface of 3ds Max when I first opened it, I saved myself time in future exercises as I now knew how everything functioned.
I also stayed true to my word and worked on my areas of improvement throughout the weeks and will continue to do so. My YouTube homepage is currently flooded with software tutorials and I recently bought a small book full of drawing ideas and have dedicated 10 minutes every day to sketch a page. This has improved my sketching time significantly and my accuracy is slowly getting better too. I'm currently sketching in pencil but will likely move on to pen soon to make further progress.
I can say with certainty that I will come back to this blog frequently to remember the important techniques and guidelines I've learnt until they finally get engraved onto my brain as they are an important stepping stool for future years of study to come. From technical drawings to model making to 3D printing, I greatly treasure learning about the essentials of industrial design throughout this course.
To finish this off, I do want to recognise that the only reason I was even able to learn thus content and execute it so well was due to the help of the tutors. From detailed exercise instructions to frequently helpful constructive feedback, I never once felt hopeless or like I was unable to complete something. The tutorials were also very informative and engaging although I think that's mainly because of Gonz's pink glasses - they're too nice to ignore.
Thank you to Gonz, Rob and Sarah for such a fantastic course and experience these past ten weeks. I wish it would have lasted a little bit longer but I guess it's now time for me to conclude my final post.
Thank you, goodbye and if you can please do write a comment about how much you appreciate Carl the Capybara from my week 8 post.
El fin
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mysticmousecat · 3 years
Text
A Hypothesis For Your Thoughts? Part 2 (NSFW...sort of)
And we continue with the theme of Viktor being a massive fucking tease and knowing exactly what he’s doing to you
Words: 5k
Warnings: Sexual situations, Viktors endless fucking teasing, you’re both being horny on main
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If Viktor’s intentions that day had been to irreversibly wedge himself into every facet of your thoughts, then he did a truly exemplary job. On your way back to your rooms, where you very courageously hid for the remainder of the day, you couldn’t find it in yourself to look anyone in the eyes, however by the time you’d actually made it you found yourself feeling awfully silly. You let the frigid water of the shower wash over you, effectively dousing the molten flames under your skin and actually allowing the first coherent thought through in what felt like hours. And that first coherent thought went a little something like ‘What. The. Fuck?’ Viktor hadn’t even really done anything, he touched you. It certainly wasn’t the first time you’ve felt his hands on you, you’ve known him a long time and helped him with numerous experiments, so why did it effect you so much this time? Sure, his touch has always had some kind of effect on you, but never this violently overwhelming. Though it had felt less like he was touching you and more like he was…caressing you? That was the only word you could find to describe exactly what had happened. But you knew one thing for sure, you were not going to be prepared for the next time you saw Viktor.
That god damned inventor occupied nearly every one of your thoughts for the remainder of the week, his amber eyes that seemed to bore into your soul every time they met yours, his dexterous hands on your skin, maneuvering your body in whatever manner needed to complete his desired task, his mahogany colored hair that you’d seen perfectly unkempt far too many times for your mind not to associate it with other not so saintly acts that could achieve the same look…and his god forsaken voice. Who made it fair for him to have such power over you, power that he didn’t even know he had!
You pushed the thoughts from you head, for the millionth time that day, it wasn’t like it was going to happen again. It was a one off, unrepeatable, the testing for that particular invention was done. You had seen Viktor again numerous times over the remainder of the week, and everything seemed back to normal, he was completely unaffected, as expected considering this was a event between only you, yourself and your mind. See totally fine, normal…normal.
You found a new hatred for that word.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 You walked around the room, it wasn’t densely packed, only a few students. You were surprised at how few students actually did poorly enough on Professor Heimerdinger’s exam to actually require additional tutoring, your class consisted of 10 maybe 12 students max, all of which were engrossed in the equations sitting in front of them.
“Miss (Y/L/N), I’m not sure about question 15.” One of the students asked while you were turned assisting another student with the same question, you were about to turn to address them when another voice beat you to it.
“Well, what are your variables?” You didn’t need to turn to know who it was, his honeyed voice always sent chills down your spine. When you finally did muster up the courage to turn you saw exactly what you knew you would, a student listening intently as Viktor explained the premise of the equation they were stuck on and then explaining how to get the solution. You stood there and admired for a moment, just watching as Viktor’s mind worked, he always got such a specific spark in his eyes when he was explaining physics, one that was ingrained in your mind the first time you saw it. Maybe that was it, the moment you fell in love with him.
Viktor was patient, never interrupting your class, never trying to get your particular attention, not that he needed to try very hard anyway. He simply observed from the wall beside the door, leaned back against it, hands hidden in his pockets, cane leaning against the wall beside him. With the way he was standing it made sure you got an uninterrupted view of him, his lean frame coupled with his staggering height, how his waistcoat hugged his torso in just the perfect way, his right leg lazily crossed in front of his left. When you’d first met Viktor, he’d been quite sickly, suffering from an illness derived from his childhood in Zaun, already an immunocompromised child the toxins in the air weren’t doing him any favors and they’d caught up with him in his mid-20’s. You’d never seen the worst of it, he was in the beginnings of recovery when you’d shown up, but you’ve seen photos, documentation photos taken by Jayce to show the progress of Hextech, his clothes practically hung off of him , he was gaunt and pale and…deathly, it was that very research that ended up ultimately saving Viktor’s life, although “that research had its costs” is what Viktor tells you, he’s never expanded on that though.
Looking at him now, Viktor was still thin, he probably always would be honestly, but he’d filled out a little more, his clothing fit him for one, the color had returned to his face and while he certainly still had the dark circles under his eyes from the numerous tireless nights spent working in the lab, (Some lessons we never learn) he looked alive. And looking at him was certainly something you were having a very hard time not doing when you were supposed to be teaching a group of students.
Soon enough the class ended and students started making their way out, returning to their normal schedules as you collected their papers for grading later, soon enough it was just you and Viktor left in the room, and while the room was spacious, designed to house classes of 60 students at a time, the second it was just you and Viktor it felt significantly smaller, you could practically feel his body heat from across the room.
“What can I do for you Viktor?” You inquired, clipping the papers together for easier transport to your rooms. You could hear him push himself off of the wall, hear as he approached you, but you didn’t dare look at him. You weren’t lying when you’d said you had interacted with Viktor multiple times since that day in the lab, however you hadn’t been alone with him since then, and the anticipation in your gut as he got closer was close to painful.
“Just returning at item,” He said plainly, you glanced over and saw your coat in his hand, the same one he had so agonizingly stripped you of just days before, before equally as agonizingly torturing you with touches more sensual than any lover had been able to provide to you in the past. “It was left in the lab the other day.”
“Thank you.” You stated as you reached to accept the garment from him, but he simply held it further from your grasp, you only had a moment to be confused before Viktor spoke again.
“Please, allow me,” He said, holding the piece of clothing out, making his intentions clear. Tentatively he stepped behind you, beginning the process of inching the material of the coat up your arms, his fingers gliding against your skin, he was standing so close to you, you could feel his breath on your skin. He pulled the coat up slowly, agonizingly slow, by the time he reached your shoulders you felt like you were ready to pass out. He laid the fabric down on your shoulders in its proper place, in the process managing ghost his fingertips against your bare neck, your heart was about to jump into your throat. “Wouldn’t want you catching cold.” Viktor said finally, his breath over the shell of your ear igniting hot coals in your stomach and making your eyes loose focus, you narrowly avoided a whimper, swallowing it down hard. You thought Viktor was about to retreat, his job here was done so it was time for him to step back, but instead you felt a hot, almost too firm, grip on your hips and before you knew it you were being spun around, forced to face the man who had put you in such a state. You avoided Viktor’s eyes, knowing he could see just how hot your face was, the blush probably reached down below the collar of your shirt, but he never faltered, his fingers coming up to begin buttoning the front of the coat, making it almost all the way to your chest before he finally pulled them back, instead choosing to once again, rest his hands on your hips. Finally, you gained the courage to look up at him, and as expected he was cool and collected as ever, although if you looked closely…was he breathing harder?
“There. Perfect.” He said calmly, he wasn’t looking at your jacket when he said it, instead his gaze was fixed on your still very flushed face. There was a certain look in his eyes, you noticed, one that you’d seen several times, but usually you only saw it in your own reflection after particular thoughts of the very man in front of you got you particularly heated. Before you got the chance to dwell on it too long, Viktor’s hands left you hips and he stepped back, giving you the space you’d been craving not minutes prior. “Anyway, good day, (y/n).” Viktor began making his way to the door before stopping in front of it. “Oh before I forget,” He started, not fully turning toward you. “Would you be able to lend your assistance with that device again, I’ve made some adjustments.”
You stared at the man in your doorway for a moment. That device, he meant the one he used to practically torture you with the other day. You should say no. Say you’re busy. Something came up. There was no way you’d be able to endure that again.
“Jayce unavailable again?” You asked instead.
“No, he’s available.” Viktor answered plainly, I specifically want you is what you heard between the lines. The grin he shot you before he exited the room was positively wicked, and you knew you’d never be able to say no to this man. “Oh, and wear a skirt!” You heard him yell just before he was out of ear shot.
A skirt…
 You know it probably would have been worth your while to question exactly why Viktor wanted you to wear a skirt when you came to the lab later that evening, but nope, didn’t even cross your mind did it? The one you’d picked, you picked for a reason. You see, after the jacket incident, you saw something in Viktor’s eyes, something you recognized immediately…lust. Seeing it got the wheels turning in your head, mulling over the other day when he’d used you in testing his heart monitor, the way his fingers lingered over your skin, the way he stood so close to you, the way he took his time in strapping you in, pulling reactions from you one by one. Thinking about it now, with the knowledge you gained in the classroom, you realized something, there was absolutely no way Viktor didn’t know what he was doing to you, not a chance, and he revealed that at the end of the prototype testing. The entire time he spent driving you up the wall with touches and caresses, heightening your senses to near oversensitivity, by the time the test was over you were at the brink of too much, and right when you were expecting him to push you over the edge of just what you could handle…he stopped. He removed the belts and straps quickly and his fingers hardly grazed your skin the entire time, which meant only one thing. He was observing you, running tests on more than just his invention, he was gaging your reactions and tolerance, seeing how far he could push you before it was too much…he was a scientist after all. But here’s the thing….
So are you.
You have a hypothesis, and while Viktor is running his tests on you and his device, you’ll be conducting your own, not that he needs to know that yet.
As you made the trek from your quarters to the lab you were mulling over your plan, you weren’t going to tell Viktor anything, weren’t going to tell him that you thought he wanted you just as bad as you wanted him, because right now you were only about 55% sure, and you couldn’t afford to be wrong. Not with this. No, you needed to run tests, confirm your hypothesis before you made a move, and your first test was currently swaying around your thighs as you walked. Viktor had requested you wear a skirt, and boy howdy were you wearing a skirt! It was short, long enough to cover the important bits, you’re not trying to get ahead of yourself here, but short enough to expose a very generous portion of your thighs, he wanted a skirt, and who were you to disappoint?
You pushed open the doors to the lab, inside sat Viktor, tinkering with some kind of contraption, fully engulfed in determining its secrets, and to the far right sat Jayce, going over what looked like lab notes, of course he was the one who actually noticed your arrival, eyes darting up from his papers when you approached the center of the room.
“(y/n) what a surprise, what brings you?” Jayce greeted you warmly, as always, and his boisterous welcome is what drew Viktor’s attention away from the cube in his hand, instead turning his head to greet you, and you didn’t miss the way his eyes lingered on your legs for a moment. 60%.
“I’m helping Viktor with testing one of his inventions,” You said with feigned confidence. “Again.” You added at the end, looking directly at Viktor when you said it. Jayce looked over at Viktor, confused for a moment.
“Which device?” He asked, so Viktor hadn’t told Jayce what he’d been working on hm? Interesting.
Viktor seemed to search for an answer for a moment before settling on, “Just a project I’ve been working on, miss (Y/L/N) has been kind enough in testing its prototype.” Viktor and Jayce shared a look and a image or realization seemed to cross Jayce’s features before he abruptly stood from his seat.
“Well would you look at the time! Mel is expecting me any minute now and you know how she hates when I’m late.” And with that Jayce collected his lab notes and promptly, and quite oddly you might add, fled the room, leaving you alone…with Viktor. Suddenly your feigned confidence melted away and you were left only with the knowledge of the absolute torture you were about to endure. Again.
“So, tell me,” You started, slowly making your way toward Viktor as he made his way to stand up. “What alterations have you made to this contraption of yours?”
Viktor grinned at you, although you did notice that he kept his gaze pointedly aimed at your face, interesting. “Well, you see, I realized after our last test that the prototype did not have nearly enough points of contact, of I fixed that.” Before you could ask him to explain further you once again felt his firm grip on your hips, when had he gotten that close? He walked you backwards until your back hit the table. “Stay.” Is all he said, one word and he had your insides in knots. You needed to keep your composure! You needed to watch him! You needed to be right.
Viktor had his back to you, pulling familiar straps and cords from a compartment under his desk. You observed his fluffy mop he called hair, it curled at the ends, indicating it was getting a little too long, you’d have to convince him to cut it soon, his broad shoulders, his long torso and even longer legs, there wasn’t anything about him you didn’t consider absolute perfection, he was beautiful, so beautiful it made your chest ignite with emotions that up until you’d met him you’d never really felt before. You’d thought you’d been in love in the past, but nothing compared to what you felt when you looked at the man standing before you, he was tall and lean and clever and passionate and everything you could ever hope to ask for and GOD you hoped you were right. 65%, that’s where you were at right now, hopefully by the end of the night you’d be at 100% and you’d have a certain scientist in your bed. Viktor pulled you out of your thoughts as he approached you again, straps and belts in hand, luckily, you’d come sans coat so he couldn’t use that to torture you again. Voluntarily you presented him with your wrists, you were going to maintain control tonight, you had to.
 Okay you really should have known there was no way in hell that was going to happen. The second his fingertips touched the skin of your wrists your entire body sparked to life, like an electric jolt running through your arms and directly to your core. He pulled the straps tight, at one point giving a particularly rough yank and nearly knocking you off kilter for a moment, his eyes met yours briefly and again, you saw the same look you noticed in the classroom. 70%.
Your heart was already racing, and you’d only just begun. The next straps were due for your upper arms, he was gentler with these, careful not to bruise or pinch your sensitive skin, his nimble fingers ghosting over your flesh agonizingly slow as he fitted the belt to you. “Is this too tight?” He asked, gazing into your eyes for any signs of discomfort. You shook your head, your ability to speak hindered by the heavy gaze he had affixed to you.
“Use your words, (y/n).” Fuck!
“No, it’s not too tight.” Viktor gave you a smile before returning to his task, retrieving the other belt from the table, and moving to your other side. 87%.
His movements were just as slow with this one, taking his time, caressing your skin with such care and attention to detail, logging every single movement you made, every noise that may or may not escape your throat, every single reaction he paid painfully close attention to, at one point the back of his hand had brushed against your sternum and caused you to let out a small gasp, you’d distinctly felt when his grasp on your arm tightened in reaction. 94%.
Viktor made for the final belt, the one you knew would go over your chest. He made a spinning motion with his index finger and you turned, giving him your back, lifting your arms as you had the previous time. You felt his chest against your back, his arms come around your sides, forearms brushing against your waist as he brought the belt up to sit just above your breasts, the shirt you wore was low, so it lay flush against your hot skin. He adjusted the belt to be in the correct place, and in the process brushed his knuckles against you and you nearly whined…nearly. Your mind was reeling, heart beating faster than you thought it ever had and hot magma was flowing through your veins, honestly giving a score of anything but 100% at this point was just you prolonging the inevitable, and so you took a breath, gathered what little courage was left, and said what you had been so sure you’d never say.
“So, are you going to keep using this device of yours as an excuse to touch me, or are you going to do it for real?” You asked and thanked god he wasn’t looking at your face right now because you were sure it was beet red, your nerves sparking under your skin, anxiety rising up to the surface, you closed your eyes, what if you were wrong? What if you were overthinking harmless gestures and jumping to conclusions?
There was a pause, a pause that seemed to last forever, and right when you were about to speak again, take back your words, Viktor gave a particularly rough tug, yanking you back and knocking the air from your lungs in the most pleasurable way.
“Too tight?” Viktor asked against your ear, barely more than a whisper that made electricity shoot down your spine. You grinned, that wasn’t the voice of a man who’s mind housed innocent thoughts.
“Perfect.” You let out, and you prayed he picked up on that being directed at not just the tightness of the belt. Your back was once again against the table in no time, Viktor stood before you, two more straps in his hands. Before you could ask where he intended to put them, he sank to his knees in front of you, and you had to grip the table to keep yourself in check. The image of Viktor on his knees before you would haunt your dreams in the most delicious of ways for years to come, and with the way he was looking up at you, his heady gaze told you he intended it that way.
Just as you’d begun to recover, your heartrate spiked again when you felt a warm hand on the back of your knee, lightly lifting your leg toward him. Balancing your weight on your remaining knee, which was already about to give out from under you, you practically held yourself up on the table, watching as Viktor’s dexterous fingers trailed their way up from your knee agonizingly slow, every place he touched on fire, heat building in your core so hot you considered the idea that he may be able to push you over the edge just like this, just with the simplest of touches. Your breathing was erratic, and you knew it was obvious but you also didn’t care, you just didn’t want him to stop, but he did stop and it was at that point that you remembered why exactly he was down there in the first place.
The belt was thick and rough against the tender skin of your thigh, but Viktor was gentle and precise with how he fitted it, taking the upmost care in ensuring it didn’t hurt you. At one point Viktor leaned in close to finally fasten the belt and you could feel his breath on your inner thigh. You couldn’t hold back the whine that escaped your lips. You didn’t dare look down at him, but you had the sneaking suspicion he was smirking. His voice is what pulled your mind out of its fog.
“I was tempted to tell you to wear the same outfit from the other morning, would have given me plenty of room to work.” You knew exactly what he was referring to, you’d almost forgotten about that, you’d felt so exposed to him, however here Viktor was, with easy access to you, hands dangerously close to where you wanted them most and yet you felt nothing but excitement, desire for him to take that final step and stop his god forsaken teasing.
“Why didn’t you?”
“We wouldn’t have made it this far if you had.” The look in his eyes bore through your soul, his breath ghosting over your skin, your breath hitched in your throat, the implications of his words making your head spin. Finally, he finished fastening that damned belt, but before he moved on to the other one, he quietly leaned forward, pressing his lips against the tender skin of your inner thigh and you were seconds away from begging, begging him to stop playing this game with you and finally give you what you knew you both wanted. But Viktor was never one to lose control of himself, especially when the result of his actions was so amusing to him. Though you could tell even he was growing impatient, if the quickness with which he affixed the second belt to your other thigh was anything to go by.
You were breathing heavy by the time Viktor rose from his place on the ground, the light dusting of pink over his pronounced cheek bones indication of the effect you’d had on him. His hands found your hips again and you leaned into his touch, finally allowed to, his hands worked their way from your hips to your waist to your ribs and back down again, you gripped the table tighter to keep yourself from collapsing, you were nearing your limit, you wouldn’t be able to take much more of this without something else—anything.
“Do you have any idea how difficult it was to keep my hands to myself that morning?” Viktor asked. You remembered how he’d stayed in the doorway for most of the visit, never entering the room until the very end, had only you known it was because he was trying not to pounce on you at the time, you had a feeling things would have gone very differently that day.
“I would have let you do anything you pleased.” You whispered, he was so close to you, just a little further and—
“I had my suspicions, but I had to be sure.” He drew closer.
“And you didn’t think to just, ask?” Closer.
Viktor let out a breathless chuckle, you could feel it against your lips, you were so close. “A proper scientist does not simply ‘ask’. He must test, observe, confirm.”
“And your final assessment?” Your lips barely brushed his.
“Highly promising.” His lips pressed against yours and it was like an ocean wave crashed into you, one of your hands wrapped around his tie, tugging as close to you as you could get him, while the other tangled in his hair, pulling lightly to which he practically purred. One of his hands rested on the small of your back, pressing your body against his, his other ventured to your thigh, lifting it as you hiked yourself up onto the table, spreading your legs to let him stand between them, not once did you stop kissing him. You didn’t know for how long you’d fantasized about what Viktor would taste like, and now as your tongue met his you realized your fantasies could never live up to the real thing, he tasted like sweets and tea and something else that you couldn’t quite place but was so distinctly him.
The first roll of his hips against yours sent shock waves through you and you couldn’t catch the moan you released against his lips. You tried to pull him closer, you didn’t want to know where you stopped and he began, and you wanted fewer clothes to be involved and quickly. His lips moved from your mouth to your jaw, placing kisses down your neck and the feeling of it almost made you forget what you were doing, not completely though as you worked to undo his tie, practically ripping it from its place around his neck and tossing it you didn’t know where, you were a little too busy at the moment to pay attention. Viktor harshly sucked a bruise between your shoulder and your neck at the same time as he rocked his hips into you again. Fuck you were embarrassingly close to the edge and you wanted nothing more than for him to push you over it.
His lips were back on yours in record time, your hands trembling to undo the buttons of his waistcoat, feeling him practically rip it off of his own shoulders before tossing it into the unknown to join his tie. His hands were back on you in an instant, one venturing under your shirt, teasing the fabric of your bra while the other ventured lower, slipping under your skirt, first teasing your inner thighs before finally brushing against your clothed core. Your moan was deafening in the quiet of the room, and he was more than willing to swallow it as his fingers worked you closer and closer to the edge.
Suddenly his hands were off of you, his mouth parting from yours and you couldn’t help but gasp from the sudden change. “Vik—”
“Someone’s coming.” Was all he said as he pulled you from your perch on the table, straightening your skirt as you worked on trying to make him look semi presentable. Just as you’d finished the doors to the lab opened to reveal none other than Professor Heimerdinger, you swallowed hard, hoping he didn’t figure out what had been happening just moments before or what would have happened had he not arrived when he did.
“I thought I’d find you here,” Heimerdinger directed toward Viktor. “Jayce had presented me with some of your blueprints for future Hextech inventions and I wanted to go over them with you. Could you spare a moment in my office?”
Viktor cleared his throat before answering, “Of course Professor Heimerdinger, just let me gather my results from this test and I’ll be there.” Contented with this answer, the Yordle turned and made his way from the room, but not before you saw an all too knowing smile on his face. It wasn’t until the doors closed behind him that you finally allowed yourself to breathe, then laugh at the absolute absurdity of the situation, moments away from the most amazing sex of your life and then cockblocked by your own boss. Viktor seemed to find the situation equally as amusing, he turned his back to the door and his hands once again found your waist, pulling you the few inches closer to him that he wanted.
“And your results for this test would be?” You asked, planting your hands on his chest, feeling his heartbeat thrumming underneath. Viktor smiled before reaching over to power off the box connected to all the belts wrapped around your body, you hadn’t even seen him turn it on. He analyzed the parchment as he removed it from the needle.
“I’d say the results were highly positive.” With that he leaned down, connecting your lips one more time, a sweet kiss that made your knees week and your lungs forget how to function. Viktor was quick with removing belts from your body, laying them out on the table behind you, he caressed your wrists where there were faint red marks from the harsh material of the straps, he pressed his lips to them before placing your arms at your side.
“If you don’t go now, Heimerdinger’s going to come looking for you again.” You said quietly, no need to be loud with Viktor so close to you. He let out a laugh before placing a chaste kiss to your lips.
“We’ll continue this another time.” Viktor promised as he stepped away.
“I intend to hold you to that.” You replied as you watched him make his way from the lab toward Heimerdinger’s office.
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ikleesfiction · 4 years
Text
Will you follow through if I fall for you?
Fandom : One Chicago Word count : 3,762 words Disclaimer
Previously on this fic : Part 1 🞂 Part 2 🞂 Part 3 🞂 Part 4 🞂 Part 5 🞂 Part 6 🞂 Part 7 🞂 Part 8 🞂 Part 9
Part 10
It's been almost 6 months since you left Chicago. You spent those months working yourself to the bones as a way to forget Jay. It certainly was not a successful attempt, but at least you were too busy to think about him. You accepted Alex's idea to make a duo project and lazily named it "alex&y/n". You both started doing gigs at various clubs around the world. Pyramid, Alex's record company where you work for, continuously releases new sounds that you discovered. You keep writing and producing songs after songs. Really, your career is flourished. But deep inside, you're empty.
You never had a chance to go back to Chicago. Part of you was relieved that you don't have to deal with it yet. The other part of you was missing it so much. You might only stay four months in Chicago, but somehow the city (and its people) have marked their place in your heart.
You love Amsterdam. It's still your home, but its charm hasn't called you as it did before. Sure, you have your parents here. But you only got to meet them twice a week at best. Your work and their jobs don't leave lots of time to be together. Also, even though you have most of your friends in the city, you don't get to hang out with them all the time since you travel a lot for work. You get to make new friends along the way instead, just like you did in Chicago.
Case in point, you are currently in Norway, working on a song with Oliver Dahl, the number #1 DJ in the country.
Oliver's home studio is one of the best places you ever work in. The studio setup is practically the same as the one Pyramid has. But Oliver has a baby grand piano on one corner where through the window, you can see a tranquil lake with a green forest on its side. The view is calming and inspiring. So although Oliver is a much better pianist than you, you park yourself there and relegate him to a Korg keyboard.
"Hey, it's almost dinner time. Let's take a break," Oliver suggests to you. He guides you out from the studio and moves downstairs to his kitchen. The glass-paneled dining room has a door that leads to the back porch. You thought the view from the studio was great, but the view from down here is even better. You sit on a swing at the porch, take a deep breath of fresh air there.
Oliver comes out with two bottles of beer and hands you one, which you gladly accept. You switch your phone back on since you didn't want to be disturbed when you were working. It relentlessly buzzes once it's on. "Well, somebody is famous," teases Oliver.
You peek at your phone screen before grimacing at him, "Sorry. Nick needs something. I gotta call him back." You walk a few steps away from the porch. Without the roof over your head, you can feel slight drops of rain on your face. "Hey, boss. How's the meeting in Brussels go?"
"Infuriatingly slow. That is why I'm calling. I was hoping you can help us," Nick replies. He didn't sound too worried, so you thought it's going to be an easy request, "Sure. What is it?"
"Alex was supposed to have a phone interview with one of Chicago radio show, to talk about the new single of alex&y/n. Since our meeting here runs longer, could you do it in his stead? I know you don't like doing an unprepared interview, but I promise it won't be long, 15 minutes max."
"Alright, I'll do that." It's not like you can say no anyway.
"Great! I'll set it up. It's going to be in an hour. So don't mute your phone." Nick reminds you.
"I won't. It probably falls during our dinner here. I can keep my phone on."
"Thanks, y/n," Nick hangs up the call.
◢◤
Joe Cruz walks into the common-room of Firehouse 51 with his phone on hand. "Guys, Chicago Top 40 is interviewing Y/N right now!"
"Turn the volume up. I cannot hear it from here," Mouch complains from the couch as he mutes the tv. Joe pushes the side button of his phone and sets the volume to the max. Everyone continues doing their things quietly as they listen to the interview.
"We got one half of alex&y/n on the phone with us here. Dare I say the prettier half. Let's say hi to Y/N!" They hear the radio host cheers from Joe's phone.
"Hi, how are you doing?" you chuckle and greet back.
"We're all good here, thank you. So please tell us more about the latest single of alex&y/n? How did you guys come up with it?"
"We started writing this song probably about 8 months ago. I was in Chicago at the time actually," you start to explain.
"Oh, really? I didn't know you were in town," the host shortly interrupts.
"Yeah, it was back before we had any idea for this project. Alex came up with it when we made this song. It was supposed to be the first single of alex&y/n. But when I came back to Amsterdam, we wrote "Void" The team decided that it fitted better as the first single. Hence this song "Fiery Love" got pushed to be the second one."
The conversation regarding the song and the duo project goes on for another ten minutes before the interviewer wraps it up. Joe is about to close the radio app when he sees Jay Halstead and Hailey Upton step into the common-room of Firehouse 51.
"Enjoy the rest of your day, Y/N," says the host on air. "What time is it anyway in your place right now? I haven't got a chance to ask where you are,"
Joe's thumb stills above his phone screen. "It's almost 7 PM in Bergen, Norway," you inform the radio. Jay stiffens as he hears your voice.
"Oh, you got a gig there tonight?" the host asks curiously.
"No. Just a bit writing and studio session," you answer vaguely.
"It must've been in a studio with a view, unlike our four wall booth here," the host retorts.
You snicker quietly, "If I could, I'd trade you in a heartbeat,"
"Oh, stop it! You're too kind," the host says, thinking you're jesting.
You let out a tiny laugh, "But no, I'm serious. I wish I didn't leave Chicago," you admit candidly on air. Totally unbeknownst to the strained atmosphere in the Firehouse 51 common-room.
"Come visit soon. We'll show you our fancy dig here," the radio host returns jokingly. Joe finally decides to close the radio app, as Matt Casey addresses their guests. "Detectives, how can we help you?"
Jay looks at his partner, neglecting the fact that everyone in the room is watching him, "Can you handle this by yourself? I.. I think I left my phone in the car," Hailey is sure that Jay didn't leave his phone, but she gives him an understanding nod.
"We need to see Chief Boden," Hailey answers Matt. He then guides her to the Chief's office. When both detectives are out of range, Hermann asks the room, "It was a bit awkward, wasn't it?" Everyone ignores Hermann's comment and back doing things they did before. Kelly Severide determinedly stands up from his seat and goes outside. He finds Jay standing in front of the squad truck.
"Hey, man," Kelly greets him. Jay just nods to acknowledge him. After a few moments of silence, Kelly breaks first, "She always asks about you whenever she calls."
Jay scoffs his disbelief, "Yeah, right."
"She is not a brave girl, Jay. But she really loves you. She still regrets hurting you." Kelly tells him. Jay stays silent, taking in Kelly's words. "I don't think she's doing well out there." Kelly continues. Jay glances at him before opening his mouth to say something. But at the same time, Hailey comes out with Matt. "Let's go," she tells Jay. He nods at Matt and leaves with her without saying anything.
As both detectives walk away, Kelly shouts to Jay, "Will you pick up? If she calls you?"
Jay halts and looks over his shoulder. Not sure what to answer, he just shrugs in response.
◢◤
The following week, you find yourself working alone in Alex's studio. You go through some demos, try to find a song that you'd like to work on. The door is suddenly opened and reveals Alex and Nick coming in.
"You planning on going home tonight?" Alex says as he hands you a mug of hot tea. It's not unusual for you to stay all night working. While it was beneficial for the company, your well being is still his priority.
"Maybe," you just shrug as you accept the mug. "Thanks. So what's up?"
"I got an offer for alex&y/n gig for an EDM festival," Nick starts. "What do you think about it?"
"Cool, I guess.." you answer indifferently.
"Yeah?" Alex tries to reconfirm your agreement. You never play a festival before, so far alex&y/n only do club gigs. Even though you're basically doing the same thing, the stage and crowd size sometimes could be overwhelming, especially for someone who doesn't like to perform live.
"Uhuh," you nod before sipping your tea.
"Don't you wanna know where it will be?" Nick pushes.
"No," you say in disinterest, already looking back at your laptop. Nick raises his eyebrow questioningly towards Alex, which he answers with a subtle nod. "Alright then, I'm gonna go home now. You two get some rest. We'll talk again tomorrow," Nick informs you before leaving the room.
Alex drags a chair and sits next to you. "Talk to me. Please"
"There's nothing to talk about," you reply to your cup. Alex nudges you. Once. Twice. Thrice. "Stop it!" you scold him as you roll your chair away.
"You know I can do this all night until you talk to me," Alex says as he slides closer to you.
You exhale loudly in defeat before quietly tell him, "It's just... I'm exhausted."
Somehow he knows that you're not only talking about your body. "I'll talk to Nick. We can cancel the rest of alex&y/n gigs,"
"You know we can't," you rebuff his idea.
"We might be able to do that if I offer to take them instead?" Alex offers a solution.
"And let you be the one who burnout? Hell no," you deny his suggestion. You tiredly rub your face with your palm, "It's alright, Lex. I should have just suck it up and do it,"
Both of you stay silent for a moment. You pick your tea mug from the table when Alex unsurely speaks again, "That gig Nick talked about is in Chicago," You freeze up until Alex prods you, "Still wanna do it?"
"What do you think?" you weakly ask for his opinion.
"I think we should do it. It'd be fun. We can try to arrange a few days off. You can take me to your favorite places in Chicago, meet your friends.." Alex tells you. It sounds nice, makes you want to say yes. But you still have doubt in the back of your mind. "It's been months, y/n. Time for you to face it. Face Jay." Alex continues as if he knows your thought.
"I can't!" you shake your head in resign. "And why is that?" Alex pushes further.
"Because I still love him!" you forcefully drop your mug on the table, the tea splashes out of it.
"Then tell that to Jay! Don't make the same mistake as you did before!" Alex yells back at you. You instantly feel like you've been slapped.
Avoiding Alex's stare, you start to pack up your things from the table. "I think I need to go home now. Don't think I can work on anything tonight." You grab your jacket and hastily walked out of the studio.
A couple hours later, Alex comes by to your place with a canvas bag on his shoulder, "I got a box of chocolate and a six-pack of La Trappe Tripel here,"
"I don't think they can help me feel better this time," you quip as you open the door for him. Alex pulls the beers and chocolate out from the bag and puts them on the coffee table in front of the couch. He reaches again to the bag, "Don't worry, I come prepared. Got jenever in here too," He sets the bottle next to the chocolate. You go to the kitchen and bring out two clean glasses.
"Are we starting right away?" Alex asks you in confusion.
"Are you waiting for something else?" you start to open one of the beer bottles.
"Don't you want to eat dinner first? Or maybe have bitterballen to snack on?" Alex suggests to you. You open the chocolate box and pop one candy into your mouth. "There, I ate something," you declare sarcastically before sipping the beer in your hand.
"Okay then," Alex accepts his defeat. He goes to your kitchen and sees what you have on your fridge. "You don't mind if I finish this leftover stew, right?" he hollers at you as he puts the container in the microwave.
You snort your answer, "Go ahead. It's not like you need permission to raid my pantry anyway,"
Alex comes back with a bowl of stew and sits next to you on the couch. You fiddle with your phone for a bit before a ballad song playing on your home speaker. Alex starts to talk about various things as he eats, updating you about his sister Sara, his meeting in Belgium. He even lets you know what he had for lunch today. He keeps talking because he knows you're not gonna say anything.
Alex cracks open his second beer while you finish your third one and start to pour the gin into your glass. "I'll Be Over You" by Toto is playing on your speaker. Alex exasperatedly rolls his eyes, thinking that his best friend could really be dramatic sometimes. You sprawl on the couch with your feet on top of Alex's lap. "What if he's moved on?" you say after long contemplation, ready to tackle more serious conversation. "Ready" as in drunk enough to talk about it.
"Well, you face that with head held high and moved on too," Alex replies. "Easier said than done, I know."
"Big chance he doesn't want to see me anyway," you mutter to yourself. But Alex still answers you, "Maybe. Maybe not. You'll never know without going there,"
◢◤
It's been 7 months since you left Chicago and Jay Halstead still kept your last voicemail on his phone. Even when he's so mad at you, Jay never had the heart to delete it. Because somewhere deep inside, he could hear your sincerity. Jay is desperate to believe that you honestly love him and care about him.
Before Severide approached him the other day, nobody ever talked to Jay about his ex-girlfriend. Jay never apologized for pushing Adam. His friends guessed that his relationship ended, but no one ever said anything about it. His brother always abruptly changed the radio whenever your song was played on-air, acting all annoyed. But he knows Will is secretly still a fan of your music, just not in front of Jay. He thinks they're all worried that talking about you would raise his temper. But the truth is Jay misses you.
After his anger passed by, Jay could understand your position. You were left alone, befriending strangers in some city that far from home. While Jay understood that you missed home, he's still disappointed over the fact that you didn't tell him sooner. But it already happened, you made your choice. Now Jay is left with a bruised heart and silently pined over his ex.
Jay is lost in his thoughts. He jolts in surprise when he feels something cold and wet on his cheek. Jay looks up to find Will, who hands him a glass of beer. "How is the game going? Anything interesting happens when I'm gone?" Will asks Jay as he sits and looks down to the ice rink. They are at the United Center arena, watching a Blackhawks game.
"Nah, you don't miss much," Jay tells his brother. "Thanks for taking me here, man."
"It's nothing. I want to do something for your birthday, but since I have to work double shifts tomorrow, we just have to celebrate early." Will raises his glass for a toast. The brothers shout wildly during the game, chant together with other spectators in the stadium, basically having a good time. When the game is on a break, Will and Jay trade a light banter between each other. The jumbotron above plays adverts that they ignore.
"This summer, coming back to the Soldier Field Arena. We proudly present, Spring Awakening Music Festival! Featuring..."
When they hear the ad's narrator mentions "alex&y/n" Jay spontaneously looks up at the jumbotron. There was a picture of you and Alex, standing back to back, staring hard through the camera. Even with the cold gaze and unsmiling face, Jay still thought you look good. The announcement was certainly a surprise. Jay remembered when you told him that you don't like to perform in front of crowds. Now here you are, headlining a big stage. Time's changed, he thinks to himself.
Jay keeps looking at the gigantic screen, even though now it's showing another ad. If anyone asks him, Jay cannot tell what this new ad is about. His mind is busy thinking about something/someone else. Will glances at his brother and notices the tightness of Jay's shoulders. "I won't come to see them, even if they give me free tickets," he remarks wittily. Jay burst out a laugh and elbow his brother, "Thanks, man." he is grateful for his brother's understanding.
◢◤
Jay wakes up late the next morning. He spent the night listening to your podcasts and fell asleep with your voice on his ears. Seeing you on the jumbotron made him missed you more. His phone battery was drained, his alarm didn't ring. It's only because of habits from his ranger days that he woke up and gets ready in time to go to work.
Just as he walks out of his place, a delivery man is stopping him. "I got a package for Jay Halstead?"
"Yeah, that's me," Jay says distractedly, trying to recall if he orders anything online. The guy hands him a bag and a receipt form. Jay skims the paper before signing it. On the shipper box, it is stated, "Belgian Chocolatier Piron, Inc." He returns the signed form to the courier. "Thank you. Have a nice day, Sir", chirps the man. Jay pauses slightly, looking at the bag, before running to his car once remembers that he's late for work.
Once Jay arrives at the district, he puts the suspicious package on his desk. He opens the bag cautiously and pulls out a golden cardboard box with a black bow tied around it. He digs deeper into the bag but finds nothing more, no notes or cards, just this golden box.
"You got a box of Piron?! Can I have one? Please?" Jay hears Kim Burgess squeals at him.
"What the hell is a Piron?" Adam Ruzek asks loudly from behind her. Kim starts to pull the bow, but Jay moves the box away quickly. "I don't even know who it's from. We should be careful. I'll send it to the lab.."
"Is that Piron?!" Hailey Upton shrieks as she steps closer to Jay's desk.
"What? You know about this Piron too?" Adam baffles even further.
"They are like one of the best chocolatiers in town." Hailey impatiently explains to Adam. "Is it yours, Jay?" She sounds rather demanding than asking.
"Yes, it's Jay's. And he wants to bring it to the forensic lab. Unbelievable..." Kim says disapprovingly.
"I don't even know who send it! Aren't you worried if it turns out to be a bomb or a deadly virus?" Jay tries to reason to his teammates, who are now circling around him.
"What bomb?" They all jump in surprise when they hear Voight from behind them.
"Ah, it's nothing, Sarge. There are no bombs anywhere. At least not in the city of Chicago... Maybe..." Jay rambles.
"Are you gonna open that box, Halstead?" Voight cuts him off, pointing at the innocent box.
"I'm not sure, Sarge," Jay meekly admits. Voight pulls the black bow that was half undone because of Kim and opens the box gently. "Oh no, it's a bomb," Adam whispers as he hides behind Kevin Atwater but peeks over his shoulder. The girls are excitedly bouncing on their heels, seeing the rows of chocolate inside the box. Voight takes one and confidently bites into it. "You should never waste good chocolate. By the way, happy birthday, Jay." He pats Jay's shoulder before stepping toward his office. Jay gives Voight a small smile, though he still confounds about the situation.
Jay looks at the rest of the team. Hailey bites a candy on her right hand as she picks another with her left. Kim got half-bitten chocolate on her fingers. Her eyes were closed as she savors the taste. Adam's hand hovers above the box, cautiously looking at his teammates, "You girls feel okay? No dizziness, nausea, anything?" His questions were left unanswered since the girls were too busy munching.
Kevin offers Jay a handshake and continues with a quick hug, "Happy birthday, bro!" Jay clasps his shoulder, "Thanks, Kev,"
"So someone sent you this as a birthday gift, huh? Quite special, isn't it?" Kevin picks one candy from the box.
"I guess. If only I knew who sent it..." Jay wonders. He also takes one piece of chocolate and nibbles into it. The bittersweet taste suddenly reminds him of a particular someone. At the same time, his phone chirps on his desk. Jay checks his phone and finds a voice memo from an unknown, international number. He moves to a quieter place and listens to the message.
"Hi, Jay," Jay holds his breath, recognizing the voice on the other end. "It's me, y/n... I just want to wish you a happy birthday... Hope you enjoy the chocolate," He waits as you hesitate to continue. "Err... Stay safe, alright? I love you." As if just realizing what you've said, Jay hears you curse in panic, "oh shi.." and the message briskly ends.
Next on this fic : Part 11
+x Taglist +x
@shipshipshipau @itsdesiree86 @thevelvetseries @annaallicce
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cihrp · 3 years
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RULES
Welcome to Crowned in Horns! We’re a 21+ lit/adv supernatural gothic rp designed to be fun and welcoming. By creating a character you agree to the following rules:
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Treat everyone with respect.
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apathycarestostudy · 4 years
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Academic Success Tips from My Parents
Out of all the things my parents enforced in my siblings and I, the most profound were educational and life success tips. Legit would get 100% regardless of the subject/ course/ workload. Here’s a bunch of them.
Before class:
Spend no more than a quarter of the journey to class chilling. 
Organize your study materials according to subject. Files and folders in the back, then textbooks, then notebooks. Stationery in appropriate places.
Always carry a folder full of blank sheets (plain, graphed, all the kinds!).
Fix your bag before you sleep. Hang your wristwatch on the strap so you don’t forget it when you go.
Clear your desk/study area as soon as you’re done - you’re not allowed to move out of that spot until you do.
If you have a study journal/ school diary/ study guide, read it everyday before class. 
Be the first one there, at least 15 minutes early (30 mins to an hour early is favourable).
If the teacher walks in, you better greet them with a smile, regardless if they’re crabby or not. Everyday.
You have the option to relax and do whatever before the teacher walks in. However, you have to preview the lesson before it starts. No exceptions.
Make ‘preview’ notes, which is basically little helpful tidbits about what’s to come, stuff you’re not sure about, questions and guides, how formulas connect - literally anything that’ll make the class go smoother for you.
During class:
You can talk to your friends before class, but as soon as it starts, not a word or glance in their direction.
Have all your materials either out if you have the space, or within reach. 
Listen carefully and take notes where appropriate (on printed ppts, on the corners and margins of the textbook, or an actual notebook), always, every class. There’s no such thing as ‘I didn’t take any notes today’ or ‘There wasn’t anything going on’. 
Always write the date and the day. Make an index as you go.
No highlighters during class. Underline textbooks with pencil only, and use pencils for sketches.
Whenever a teacher assigns work or extra readings or reference materials, write them down - always. Optional or not.
You better write down test/ quiz/ exam dates, even if they’re happening the next day and you’ll obviously remember. 
Speaking of exams, if the teacher mentions that word, write down everything they say, dialogue tags and all.
Answer as much questions as you can. It would be favourable if you answer twice per class or more, but it’s fine if you don’t. Your performance matters more.
Give people a chance to answer and ask questions.
Listen to what they’re saying and what response the teacher gives, even if you know it. Listening skills are important.
If an exercise is assigned during class, get on it like it’s an exam, and show the teacher your work (if possible) for corrections.  
If there’s a couple minutes before the class ends, but the teacher’s lesson finished for whatever reason (a final exercise is going on and you finished, they’re taking questions etc.) you keep to yourself if you’re not talking to the teacher. Read a book, do some work, anything productive.
You can help your friends and classmates now. Never say no, even if you’re not sure, say so and let them know you’re willing to struggle with them for a solution.
If you lend stationery, get it back before you bounce.
Arrange your materials backwards as you go through the day.
If you have another class right after, you better get over there immediately. It doesn’t matter if you’ve gotten more than enough time to mess around. Take your friends if you if you’d like.
During breaks:
Study, read, review, or preview. Something light for at least a quarter of the break this time.
If someone asks for help, help them (again). It’s good practice for you to see if you understand, and it’s good practice for when you go out into the world.
NEVER GO TO TEACHERS UNLESS IT’S ABSOLUTELY DETRIMENTAL.
If you have nothing light you can do, you can do whatever. 
After class:
Start by finishing all your homework. It isn’t due this week? Doesn’t matter. Always do your homework as soon as it’s assigned.
Once you’re done with your homework, check your study journal/ school diary/ study guide again. Take note of what’s coming up.
stUDY NOW PLEASE. All the subjects / courses you’ll have tomorrow should be either a) memorized if you didn’t have more than an hour of homework time or b) read and reviewed and tried and tested if you did. 
You can use highlighters now. Make summary notes and formula master lists. 
Organize your stuff again. 
You’re caught up with everything and barely did an hour today? Time to bust out the optional readings then.
You have no extra stuff too? Time to go on the computer and get some resources yourself. 
If there’s a big project, plan every step with excessively precise details. Follow them. Don’t forget to add buffers in case you miss something.
You missed something? Plan all over again. 
Go to sleep by 7 if you’re in school and 10 if you’re in college. You haven’t finished studying? I’ll wake you up at 3/4 in the morning then.
Did I mention do your assignments the day they’re assigned to you?
No relaxing till the weekend. You wake up, go to classes, come back, shower, eat, then study until you go to bed. Oh, and lay out your clothes right down to the shoes and socks (accessories too) right before you do.
Weekends:
Sike. You only get one day off. 
(Legit tho, back in the day, my work week was from Sunday to Thursday, and my parents would allow Thursday night and half of Friday off. We had to get up at eight-thirty in the morning max and study until lunch with zero breaks. Lunch would usually be at 1:30 pm. You can forget about most of Saturday too. We’d study till lunch, then have to go back again until late afternoon (about 5:30 pm - 4:30 if we were lucky). And then of course, since we were starting back on Sunday, we’d be in bed by 7. People would wonder how in the world we’d be able to sleep at 7 with all that we had to do as students - now you know.)
Don’t get me started on exams lol. This may seem harsh, but without this type of discipline, I wouldn’t be doing as okay as I do now with the subpar standards I’ve seemed to developed in college. Well. I’ve got a bunch of other things I used to do (some still do), as these are only the ones I could remember on the top of my head. More coming soon maybe?
Hope this helps you!
EDIT: DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT ADVOCATING ILL-HEALTH. THIS IS ONLY THE ACADEMIC ASPECT OF MY LIFE, NOT THE ENTIRETY OF IT. IF YOU’RE TRIGGERED, READ THIS. THANKSS.
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litwitlady · 4 years
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Date Nights (1/5)
Reunion Series Part 2. Follow up to Monopoly/game board verse. Read on AO3.
Shameless Fluff.
Ch. 1 The Crashdown
Alex climbs out of his Explorer and smirks at the very perplexed look on Michael’s face. The shadows and highlights cast from the firepit’s flames giving him an almost preternatural glow. Michael sets his feet down in the dirt beneath him and leans forward in his rusty patio chair. ‘I’m not due at your place for another hour.’
‘Well, it’s my turn to change things up a bit.’ He grabs the arm rests on either side of Michael and leans in for their first kiss of the night. Michael tugs at his jacket, knocking him slightly off balance and halfway onto his lap. They both laugh and Alex shivers as Michael’s TK buzzes along his skin ensuring his fall is harmless.
Michael’s arms wrap tightly around Alex’s waist as he nibbles lightly at his earlobe. ‘Haven’t seen you much this week. Work still rough?’
Alex settles further into his lap and rests his forehead against Michael’s temple, exhaling loudly as if it’s the first time he’s taken a breath all week. ‘Yeah. I’ve got at least another week of late nights. How’s the Max situation going?’
His hands squeeze at Alex’s hip, fingers slipping through his belt loops. ‘Nothing’s changed. We’re still trying to figure out our next play.’ He leans back to look up at Alex. ‘Speaking of, what are we doing tonight?’
‘Going to the Crashdown for dinner.’ He reluctantly slides out of Micheal’s lap and holds out his hand. ‘Game nights have become date nights.’ Michael takes his offered hand and allows Alex to pull him out of his seat. They don’t let go until they’re forced apart at Michael’s truck. Sliding inside, Alex shuts his door and watches Michael start the engine. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t make more of an effort to see you this week. I wanted to but knew you were busy with Isobel and Max.’
Michael glances over his shoulder as he starts to back out of the junkyard. ‘Not your fault. Getting home after 10 every night only to have to wake back up at 5 am is out of your control. Besides, I kind of liked it.’
Alex’s brow furrows deeply at that very unexpected reply. But Michael’s eyes crinkle as he huffs out half a laugh. ‘I hated not seeing you.’ He reaches for Alex’s hand again. ‘But I don’t mind the part where our first relationship glitch is something as mundane as being too busy to see each other.’ They smile across the seat at one another before Michael turns his eyes towards the open highway in front of them. ‘It’s just such a normal fucking problem and that’s a nice change of pace for us.’
‘Well, I have some thoughts about a solution.’ Michael comes to a stop at a traffic light and glances over at him. ‘You, Isobel, and Max always spend your nights at Max’s house. Maybe once or twice a week you can spend them at mine.’
The light turns green, but Michael ignores it. ‘You want me, Iz, and Max invading your space when you’re not home?’ Someone behind them honks so he finally pushes the accelerator and crosses the intersection, looking for a spot to park.
‘Just give me a heads up in advance. There’s a spot behind that Tahoe.’
Michael parks and cuts the engine off. ‘We’re sometimes up until one or two in the morning. Won’t that bother you?’ He frowns at Alex.
‘No.’ He shakes his head at Michael and smiles. ‘I’ve slept through worse than the three of you talking in my living room.’ Sliding across the bench seat, he yanks softly at the collar of Michael’s coat, pulling him into a quick, sloppy kiss. ‘It’ll be worth it when you crawl into bed beside me at the end of the night.’
Michael tilts forward suddenly, pressing their mouths back together. Alex parts his lips, welcoming the urgent, insistent push of Michael’s tongue as the kiss deepens and their hands begin to slip beneath the cotton of undershirts. In his exuberance, Michael’s elbow honks the horn and startles them both apart just as Rosa knocks on the Chevy’s window. ‘The whole diner can see you two. And I’m pretty sure no one ordered a side of you two sucking face.’
Alex feels his cheeks flush, but Michael’s shit-eating grin is contagious. ‘No one turns down a free show, Ortecho. Especially not one this good looking.’
They exit the truck and join Rosa on the sidewalk. She narrows her eyes at Michael. ‘Don’t get any ideas that this special treatment exists beyond tonight and nearly an hour of Alex’s groveling.’
‘Don’t forget the bribery.’ Alex grabs Michael’s hand and pulls him towards the Crashdown’s door. They follow Rosa zigzagging through the various diners and waiters before heading up the stairs and onto the roof. She hands them both menus and disappears back down the stairs without another word.
It’s windy and Michael runs his fingers through his tangled curls as he takes in their surroundings. Nothing’s different than the last time he was up here with Liz except the table set up beneath the Crashdown’s towering sign. ‘Where’d you get these?’
Alex walks over to the two single booth seats he and Rosa had hauled up earlier. ‘They were in storage. Back in high school, Liz and I used them for quiz bowl practice. We saved them from Arturo’s garbage pile when he was remodeling and tried to rehab them ourselves.’ He shakes the chair to show how much it still wobbles. ‘We definitely didn’t have your skill set.’
Michael plops down in one of the unsteady seats. ‘You were on quiz bowl? How come I don’t remember that?’
Taking the seat opposite him, Alex laughs. ‘I was an alternate. An alternate to an alternate, actually. Mostly, I just helped Liz practice because she hated everyone else on the team. How come you weren’t on the team? You’d have been so good.’
‘Wasn’t much of a joiner. But Liz and I would have cleaned up, for sure.’ He grins at Alex and then motions vaguely around them. ‘So what’s this all about? Still trying to hide me away?’ He keeps the smile tight across his face but a sharp edge has crept into his voice.
Alex shakes his head. ‘No. No, not at all. We can eat downstairs if you want. Really. I just...everything’s so new and I’m selfishly enjoying having you to all to myself. I promise.’ He reaches across the table and grabs Michael’s hand, holding on with more than a twinge of desperation. ‘Besides, we already gave everyone in the diner a free show. I don’t think they harbor any misconceptions about what’s going on up here.’
Michael squeezes his hand and gives him a reassuring smile. ‘What is going to happen up here? With all this privacy?’ He slides off the sparkly red vinyl seat and joins Alex on his, slipping his hand between Alex’s thighs and laughing at the easy way Alex opens for him. Less than a minute later, Alex pulls hard at the curls along the nape of Michael’s neck, frantically trying to gain better access to his neck. So Michael straddles him and eagerly bares his throat to Alex’s hungry mouth.
They don’t hear Rosa approaching until she claps her hands right next to both of their ears, sending Michael sprawling ungracefully to the ground. ‘I clock out in fifteen minutes. Order now or never.’
‘There are other waiters.’ Michael bends over to brush the roof’s soot off his cleanest pair of jeans. ‘Enjoy the show?’
‘Nothing I haven’t seen before, payaso.’ She smiles sweetly at Michael but leaves the evil glint in her eye fully on display. ‘Burgers and fries?’
Alex smiles sheepishly at her. ‘Sure. And one chocolate milkshake.’
Rosa spins on her heels, muttering something in spanish under her breath. Michael collapses into his own seat. ‘Maybe we should just get the food to-go. Head back to your place.’ He winks at Alex. ‘Not that I don’t appreciate the effort. It’s just that at home we could have dessert first.’
‘I’m guessing you’re not talking about my milkshake.’ He pulls his wallet from his back pocket. ‘We don’t have to go to my house. The airstream has served us fine in the past.’
Michael shakes his head and lets the corners of his mouth curl into an overt suggestion. ‘I like the way you spread me out on your giant bed.’
They lock eyes, holding on for a long, heated moment before sliding from their seats simultaneously and moving quickly to the stairwell’s door. Michael beats Alex and holds the door open for him. At the bottom of the stairs, they meet Rosa and turn her around, pushing her back towards the counter. Michael tosses their food into a to-go bag, and Alex shoves all of the money in his wallet into Rosa’s outstretched hand. ‘Thanks again.’ He kisses her quickly on the cheek before Michael roughly pulls him towards the diner’s front door.
‘Are those two okay?’ Arturo rests his hand on Rosa’s shoulder as they both watch Michael and Alex’s frantic scramble back to Michael’s truck.
Rosa holds up the cash in her hand. ‘They just paid $80 for $30 worth of food. Don’t ask questions, Papi.’
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weshaynes · 4 years
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Open - “The Bravery” service at the divine touch!
Warning! 18+
Not for the faint of heart or gentle of soul!
Look at this amazing, limited time offer the divine touch has to offer for our female members!
Recently we've had Wes, the man behind the "The Bravery" social media channel join us here at the Divine Touch in Edgewater. Wes is known for uploading video and audio of his intense sessions with his participants and he has moved into our location to have a new set to work on. We're offering his service for all female subs interested. Beware however, that Wes does not do gentle and he does not do kind.
Sessions consist of various sexual acts and usually last about three (3) hours, though sessions of up to six (6) hours are not uncommon. A session will last until the handler deems it done, or the participant states clearly she wishes to leave after the use of a 'stop' safe word (see section 4), please keep this in mind when booking your session.
Of course, all "Good Samaritan" rules will be followed:
No sudden spikes in extremeness of sexual actions.
Safe-words will be clearly communicated and honored.
Aftercare will be provided if required/requested.
All hygiene and sanitation rules will be upheld.
 We cannot promise that it will pleasant, only that it will be intense.
Besides the regular consent given when signing up with the divine touch, an additional consent form is found below1. If you wish to book a session, please fully read and fill the form below:
Additional Consent Form for "The Bravery" services at the Divine Touch
Your session might contain the the items/activities described in section 1, these are non-negotiable. These items may or may not be present in your particular session, this is by the choice of the handler, though suggestions can be given during the session. By signing this document you are agreeing to be subject all of the items in section 1 for the duration of your session. When not specified, all less rough forms of an action should also be considered part of this list.
Section 1:
 Domination:
Humiliation
Rough handling
Restricting movement
By strength
By body weight (lying down)
Between wall/object and
Commands
To perform sexual acts
To perform acts on humility/submission
Punishments:
Physical
Verbal
Humiliation
Berating/criticize
Very light choking/breath play (no chance of damage or fainting)
Ejaculation on participant:
Body
Face
Vagina:
Sex
Oral sex
Clitoral stimulation using:
Fingers
Mouth/Tongue
Sex Toys
Insertion of:
Finger
Fingers2
Sex toy
Breasts:
Rough handling
Nipple pinching (using fingers)
Light biting of both breasts and nipples
Mouth:
Insertion of:
Finger(s)
Penis (Fellatio)
Ejaculation
Rope gag
Ball gag
Sex toy
Bondage:
Light bondage (limited movement available, i.e. hands tied together)
Medium bondage (Very limited movement available, i.e. majority of body tied to wall or floor)
Blindfolding
 Verbal abuse:
Shouting
Cursing
Insults
Aimed at personality
Aimed at actions during session
Aimed at sexual performance
 Kinks:
Light impact play on non-sensitive areas3
Light marking (visible 1-4 days)
Caused by Teeth
Caused by Nails
Light overstimulation
Light orgasm extension.
 Section 2:
The following actions can be present by default, but can be excluded if requested, please strike-through each item that should be excluded during session. Please note, that the more options available to your handler, the more intense the session will be, safe-words will always be adhered to:
Vagina:
Insertion of foreign object4
Subject to impact play
Reception of ejaculation
 Anal:
Sex
Reception of ejaculation
Insertion of finger
Insertion of fingers2
Insertion of butt plug
Insertion of other sex toy
Insertion of foreign object3
Breasts:
Nipple clamps
Subject to Impact play
Rough biting of nipples and breasts
Bondage:
Heavy Bondage (Body completely tied to wall/floor)
Rope Bunny (no movement, suspended in air)
Rough tying of rope, leaving marks, cutting blood circulation.
 Verbal abuse:
Insults:
Aimed at appearance
Aimed at hygiene
Aimed at social status
 Kinks:
Wax play:
Non-sensitive areas
Breasts
Forced orgasm:
Single
Multiple (successive)
Medium orgasm extension
Extreme orgasm extension
Medium overstimulation
Extreme overstimulation
Pet play
Other:
Inclusion of third person.
Female
With strap-on
Without strap-on
Male
 Section 3:
Please provide additional actions and/or kinks/fetishes you wish to see during your session. Please note, not all kinks will be accepted. Off limits are the following (not limited to): Gore, Bathroom play, knife play, infantilism.
If a kink requires additional tools and or preparation, additional costs might be charged or the session might be delayed to accommodate the request.
Kinks I would like to have present during my session:
     Section 4:
 Please provide the following safe words5:
Two (2), or more, safe-words commanding the handler to stop completely:
"Stop" Safe-word 1:
"Stop" Safe-word 2:
One (1), or more, safe-word asking the slow down or lower the intensity:
"Slow" Safe-word 1:
  Section 5:
Please note:
Due to the nature of the handler, all sessions will be fully recorded by multiple video and audio sources. A copy of these recordings will be given to the participant within 1 working day of the session. These recordings will then be uploaded to the "The Bravery" social media channels, during the editing the face of the participant will be blurred. Any mentions of the participant's real name or nicknames linked to their real name will be bleeped out. There could always be a chance of the identity of the participant to be discovered by unique or striking tattoos, birthmarks, piercings or other markings. Also the identity could be revealed through the sound of the participants voice.
The final video will contain a selection, if not all, of the domination and sexual acts, if one of the 'stop' safe-words is uttered during the session, the act or the last part of the act will not be
Due to the extra income generated by these videos, we are required to charge an extra $250,00 if the participant wishes for the video to not be released onto the internet.
Additionally, the participant can request a section of max. 10 minutes to be edited out of the video (might incur +$50 extra cost per section if section was going to be in final video).
The decision to prevent the video from being uploaded to the social media channels can be made for up-to two weeks after the session, after which the video editing will begin. The participant will be notified if the video editing process has been completed and will have a chance to review the video for the duration of 24 hours before the video is uploaded, after this there is a final go/no-go option. If the participant chooses a no-go at this point the editing costs of $1500,00 will be charged to the participant.
If the participant cannot afford to make these payments but wishes to prevent the video from being uploaded to the internet they should contact the divine touch to discuss custom solutions, we will never upload videos of participants that cannot afford to pay the costs stated above.
 Divine touch and the handler cannot be held liable for any damage both physical and mental as a result of the following scenarios:
Not using agreed upon safe-word when wishing to stop. The handler will not stop until the safe-word is uttered. In case of inability to speak a sign or movement will be agreed upon to indicate a safe-word.
Not following or incorrectly the orders of the handler.
Use of items found on location by the participant themselves without supervision of the handler.
Excessive struggling and/or attempting to escape during bondage/physical domination.
Regret and/or trauma from wishing to have used the safe-word (sooner).
Section 6:
 I _________________ born on _____________ in ______________ hereby confirm that I have read this form and state that I both understand and agree with the content therein.
  Signature: _______________
 Date: ___________________
 Location: ________________
  1. Additional consent forms must be signed a maximum of 24 hour before the start of the session, consent forms will be provided upon booking of the session. Session time is set once consent forms are signed.
2. We will always take care of our clients, we will slowly increase intensity and will aim for enjoyment. We always take note of both safe words.
3. The following are considered sensitive areas: Head/face, breasts, anus, vagina, all others are considered non-sensitive.
4. Foreign objects are objects not meant to be used as sex objects, i.e. pens, vegetables (carrot/cucumber). No extreme sized or dangerous objects will be used, our handler is trained in the safe use of foreign objects as sex objects. All objects are cleaned and disinfected before use.
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writingonjorvik · 5 years
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Can We Discuss Solutions To Star Coin Bloat?
So a while ago, I ran some analysis on your opinions on price of Star Coins, which is where my 70% of players think Star Coins are overpriced number comes from. Around this, there was a discussion on the Riders On Jorvik Discord around the new Andies being 950 SC/$30 USD, and some solutions to combated price bloat. Which is what I wanted to expand on today.
Ok, I want to start off by pointing out that $30 for a digital horse is a lot of money. You can buy model horses for waaaay cheaper than that, and in terms of video games, $30 is the standard price for high quality 30-40 hours games, like Rimwold and Slay the Spire. Pokemon Let’s Go Eevee and most Harvest Moon/Story of Seaons games are $30 at release, and most triple AAA games drop to $30 once their sequels come out. And in terms of MMOs, is roughly the price of expansions. So for SSO to charge $30 for one horse is outlandish and waaaay overpriced by industry standards. Most games will sell mount skins for $5-$10, max.
I want to go over the one excuse SSO keeps using in reference to this issue: they charge more for newer models/special features because more time went into them. Well I fucking hope it did! It’s SSO’s job to make a better game, which means spending more time making their product better. But that does not justify them adding an “improvement” tax on players because they’re taking a while to figure it out. That’s like if I charged extra on my next book because I became a better writer since I published the first, and not base my pricing on production and industry standards. It’s a bullshit excuse because improving the game is SSO’s job to begin with, and it’s not our responsibility to support that. It’s also incredibly dangerous because it causes extreme bloat, which we’ve seen. 
However, horses are SSO’s main and only real big skins and they don’t do expansions, so we can’t completely compare apples to apples here. So what are some SSO types of solutions we can apply?
1. Just Make It Cheaper
This is the easiest and most obvious. The prices for Star Coins should drop. It’s been proven over and over again that lower prices do better in sales. Dropping Star Coins so that $10 is 1000 SC will make horses more accessible and make it more likely people will make money sinks in the game. It costs SSO nothing to make Star Coins, so there’s really no reason not to outside of extorting players because they don’t know better.
2. Make More Horses At 500-600 Range
This goes back into that excuse I talked about earlier, but since the newer gens started coming out, SSO has continued to regularly price horses at 750+, mostly at 950 SC on account of the “special features” or “newer art style.” Again, bull reason, but it also creates a scenario of bloat. Whose to say that the next gen horses won’t be over a 1000 SC? What’s going to stop them? More horses need to be released again at the 500-600 range to prevent price bloat (and generally prevent going over 1000 SC).
3. Currency Conversion
Some MMOs do have higher prices on their pay currencies, but you know what they have to compensate? Conversion options. You can convert ingame currency into paid currency, which as a lot of benefits. It encourages people to play your game more and it also prevents those premium items feeling like a premium since you can work/play to get more. I honestly would prefer this system over the allowance, though I understand why it may not work for SSO since a lot of players will likely only be able to play on the weekends. I think 10,000 shillings to 100 Star Coins in fair though if they did this, since it’s roughly the equivalent already when comparing shilling prices to Star Coin prices on clothing.
4. More Content With Purchase
This one got a mix reaction in the Discord because I think a lot of people look at SSO as a single player game with other people running around and not an MMO. But as an MMO, I think this is fair, and with either the above or first suggestion, would be pretty fair. I think if they’re going to charge $30 for a horse, then you should get an expansion’s worth of content and not five days of busy work training. Things like mini quests that teach you about your horse’s special abilities (like the cold resist or special movements), or full on expansions. For example, you buy a Jorvik Wild Horse and unlock this side quest with a scientist where you get to learn more about the magic in Jorvik and what causes the transformations and work on tracking wild horses with a special collection daily that has you exploring the map. Or you buy a cold resist horse and unlock a quest with Nic about being able to travel in the cold easier and get extra dailies to help him speed up building his camp. The point is, if we’re going to be paying the same amount as a whole new game or expansion, we should get additional content as well. I know this irks completionists, but MMOs aren’t supposed to be completable, and, again, with one of the previous charges and/or the ability to pick up the quests on their own at a discount, this means the prices could stay roughly the same.
5. Expansion Discount
This is one of the ones suggested by the Discord that I wanted to expand on. The idea requires SSO to switch to an expansion based system. I think if SSO did switch to expansions, they’d need to do it for a whole quarter of the island (so like all of the current map is the same size as the next expansion), but considering SSO’s release style, I doubt that will go over well. But the idea is if you have an expansion (or we’ll say lifetime for the base game), then you get a discount on all Star Coin purchases in the area, which I think is pretty fair. I think for it to work, it means that major areas just need to be open, with smaller areas requiring expansions to unlock, otherwise there’s no point having a discount if you can’t buy the horse at full price. 
Like, as an example, let’s say the map we have now is an expansion area. Everyone gets access to some base quests in Silverglade, but in order to progress, you need to buy the expansion to unlock Harvest, Mistfall, Golden, etc. Or using north western Jorvik as an example, everyone can get the quests to explore Rockville and Sunnyville, but you need to buy the full expansion to reach Coyote’s Ranch, Herman Castle, or get into Pine Hill, at which point you’ll also get discounts on horses in the whole region.
6. Rotating Discounts
I think with horses already rotating in Fort Pinta, this would be a great way to make more horses accessible. Don’t drop the level caps, but horses will appear in Fort Pinta for a week as a significantly discounted price (like 500 SC discounted). The next week, a new horse shows up and gets the discount. They have to be at least gen 3 horses, but I think that’s a great rotating sale SSO could have to make more of their newer horses accessible and it’s a proven marketing tactic. Free estimate, 50% off your first meal, samples. Companies offer something for free or significantly discounted, and that encourages buyers to come back to buy again because they already got a really good deal. While I don’t think a punch card would work very well, I do think this rotating discount could help.
7. Increase Allowance For Lifetime
There’s not really an incentive to buy lifetime. I mean, you should, because you’ll save money in the long run, but as far as SSO’s listed incentives are concerned, there isn’t really one. Woah, you get some free clothes that don’t have any stats, big deal. But, what if lifetime got you 200 Star Coins in your weekly allowance? I think a lot more people would see that as an upgrade and it would cut down on bloat.
8. Log In Rewards
SSO doesn’t have login rewards. I think a great way to both cut down on bloat and encourage people to get on more is to having daily login rewards, where logging in for a month gets you a nice Star Coin bonus, like 500. It’s not enough to buy a horse in a month most of the time, but it’s a nice bump, and if you have membership, then you could definitely get one horse a month. Not to mention it gets players logging on every day!
I think, end of the day, there’s no clear cut solution to this, but there are loads of ways it can be changed so it’s not as abusive as it currently it. Patchworking a couple of these suggestions in could encourage players to get on more often instead of waiting until they’ve saved up enough Star Coins every two months for a new horse. Just, make the game accessible for kids. Most kids don’t get $30 to spend every month on their new horse game. Most adults aren’t willing to pay that either. Something needs to budge, and sooner or later, the players will realize they’re the frogs in the water on SSO’s price bloat.
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Why Dental Health Experts Say Invisalign is Better than SmileDirectClub
Our thoughts on popular teeth straightening techniques.
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If you’re considering orthodontic treatment for yourself or your children, it can be tempting to go for the cheapest option– online mail-order aligners.
These appliances provide an alternative to state-of-the-art Invisalign treatment and cost less because the direct-to-consumer process minimises involvement by a dentist.
For instance, SmileDirectClub (SDC) charges just under £1,500 for its aligners, while Invisalign orthodontics can cost £3,250 to over £4,250 and is highly unlikely to be available on the NHS.
Critics of the SDC system say orthodontics is a combination of science and art requiring expert clinical attention from a dentist in person. However, SmileDirectClub claims dentists are misleading the public to keep the cost of orthodontic therapy artificially high.
So, let’s look in a little more depth at how the SmileDirectClub and Invisalign solutions work and why dental health experts insist that Invisalign is the better option.
How Does Invisalign Work?
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A popular alternative to fixed metal braces, Invisalign hi-techcustom-crafted aligners can address multiple simple and more complex orthodontic problems, including crowded, crookedand gapped teeth, and bite irregularities.
Dental professionals use a special 3D digital scanner and virtual modelling software that produces a series of clear plastic aligner trays, with each set being worn 20 to 22 hours a day for one to two weeks.
Treatment progress is monitored by regular visits to your dentist.
How Does SmileDirectClub Work?
SmileDirectClub customers get a kit to take an impression of their teeth at home, or they can get a 3D scan in a SmileShop.
The bite cast is then reviewed online by a dentist and a series of customised 3D-printed plastic aligners is delivered by post – one set each month for about five months, to be worn at least 10 hours a night.
The system is designed for minor teeth straightening – not re-positioning teeth or improving bite function.
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SDC says patients are guided throughout the whole process, and that in complex cases they will be advised to see a dentist directly.
The American Connection
A leading player in direct-to-consumer orthodontics, SmileDirectClub was founded in 2014 in the USA, in Nashville, Tennessee. It expanded its operations to the UK in 2019, having provided mail-order aligners for more than 650,000 American adults and children aged 12-plus.
As the company originated in the USA, it makes sense to see what dental health experts in America are saying about it.
The American Association of Orthodontists (AAO) issued a consumer alert about mail-order orthodontic businesses like SmileDirectClub, saying that DIY dental treatment can result in lasting damage.
The country’s biggest dental organisation, the American Dental Association (ADA), also proclaimed a formal resolution against do-it-yourself orthodontics, warning of the potential harm to patients.
Orthodontist and author Richard Schechtman has also criticised mail-order orthodontics. Writing for HuffPost in 2015, he said DIY orthodontic treatment risked permanent damage to teeth.
SmileDirectClub – which disputes that its aligners are a “do-it-yourself” treatment – has taken legal action against orthodontists and other dentists in the US over “disparaging and false comments” about its mail-order aligners.
SmileDirectClub and Align Technology
In 2016, the USA-based global medical appliance company that makes Invisalign aligners – Align Technology – bought nearly 20 per cent of SmileDirectClub and now makes other types of aligners for SDC.
The connection between the businesses came under the spotlight on the DentistryIQ platform for dental professionals in 2017 when Chris Salierno, chief editor of Dental Economics Magazine and a Doctor of Dental Surgery, referred to concerns of dentists about “DIY dentistry”.
What Are UK Dentists Saying About Internet Dentistry?
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The British Dental Association (BDA), the professional organisation representing more than 20,000 UK dentists, has warned against the SmileDirectClub type of online dentistry, stressing that a face-to-face consultation is crucial if you’re thinking about having orthodontic treatment.
The BDA says a dentist with orthodontic training and experience can advise you on the different types of orthodontic appliances available and their advantages and risks.
BDA vice-chairman Eddie Crouch told The Daily Mail that an experienced clinician was essential for orthodontic treatment to be monitored properly and ensure any problems were fixed. If treatment wasn’t supervised over time, there was a risk of “permanent damage to dental health”.
SmileDirectClub Vs Invisalign
SmileDirectClub says it broadens access to safe, affordable and convenient teeth-straightening through dentist-directed remote orthodontic therapy.
The company says customers can consult with a dentist remotely to check on how their aligners are working, and a 24-hour call centre is available in the event of urgent issues.
The main concern of dental health experts about teledentistry systems like SmileDirectClub is the lack of face-to-face interaction with a dental professional.
If a quick fix of minor orthodontic issues at a low cost is the only factor, SmileDirectClub may be right for you.
However, you may come to the same conclusion as dental health experts in the US and UK that Invisalign is better than SmileDirectClub if you’re more focused on:
The benefits of individual attention from a dentist experienced in orthodontics.
Making sure your straightened teeth will give you a functional bite.
Getting help to keep your new smile after treatment.
Considering a wholistic approach which gives you whiter teeth as well as straighter teeth with tooth whitening or composite bonding.
A personal Invisalign trained dentist or Orthodontist will consider your dental history and be able to discuss any concerns you might have before and during treatment.
Your regular visits during treatment will also allow your dentist to assess your progress and tweak your treatment plan if necessary.
YYour invisalign trained dentist or orthodontist can also help you with post-treatment options, such as composite bonding, veneers or tooth whitening as straightening your teeth should be part of a wholistic plan to improve your smile. They can also advise you on how to maintain your smile after orthodontic therapy through preventive dentistry such as regular check-ups and professional cleanings.
from Ridgwaydental https://ridgwaydental.co.uk/why-dental-health-experts-say-invisalign-is-better-than-smiledirectclub/
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ain-t-bovvered · 5 years
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14x15 Commentary
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Special episode where a bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)
Hello and welcome:
@purpleskiesandcherrypies  (Nat)
@dean-winchesters-bacon  (Kat)  good night babe
@waywardbaby  (Zee)
@ain-t-bovvered  (Giulia)
1  2  3  4   5  6  7  8  9  10   11   12  13 14
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Giulia: Oh the music is the stupid episode kind of music
Nat: awww
Zee: Baby dean
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Giulia: THE WHIMPERING 
J: I didn’t want to leave it there. And I didn't want to just kill it.
M: I’m looking for a new home
Giulia: I can be your new home bb
Nat: NO
Giulia: I DON T TRUST IT
Zee: Bamf Jack!! Two words I never thought I’d use In the same sentence
Nat: We're in Lawrence aren't we
Zee: In what year?
Scooby doo matinee 2$ . WHAT
oh look a Metallica poster. I still have that CD 
Giulia: oh look My aesthetic
Giulia: That James Dean vibe tho
What’s this stupid music.
Zee: Charming acres???
Nat: "Where Everybody's Happy" Are we in Pleasant Ville?
I don’t trust shit.
Zee: Splash
See..?
Nat: Brain-mush
Giulia: CLEAN AISLE 3
Nat: Well, good morning to my breakfast
Giulia: TRUEST REACTION on supernatural EVER
Giulia: he loves that snake
Nat: SNAKY
C: *knocks* Hey Jack?
J: I’m good Castiel. [OMG DAAAAD stop breathing on my neck]
C: [sigh, semi-soulless teenagers]
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Giulia: What’s up with the all black
C: How's the snake?
J: I don't think he's feeling well. He won’t eat.
well...doesn’t snakes eat rarely tho? like....once a week or something?
Zee: He misses his previous owner
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LOOK AT THAT CUTE FUCKING SOFT SMILE . FUCK YOU MISHA
C: He's been through a lot of changes in a short period of time. I guess that's something you have in common.
Nat: He's going dark
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Zee: Concerned dad
C: Jack, you killed Michael. You consumed his grace.
Giulia: I. DON T. TRUST. THIS. DID HE THO?
but also.....right now I’m that granny that mistook Cas for her 3rd husband , : “you are so pretty Charles”
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Nat: I feel different now.... YA THINK
J: You want to know how much of my soul I had to burn off to kill Michael.
Yeah fuck I wanna know ok.
Nat: How could he know?!
Giulia: can’t cas look it up
Nat: He could stick his hand in there.
Giulia: HE COULD
Nat: That sounded wrong
Giulia: IT DID.
Zee: Deep inside. There I made it worse
J: I try not to think about it.
BAD. 
I don’t like that hollow stare Jack, I swear to fucking god Imma slap your soul back into your body.
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so I’m listening to the ep with my headphones and BOOOOOOY DID I HEAR THAT SIGH [cranking up the volume to the max and goes back]
Nat: I could eat him alive. And the sandwich
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A wild Castiel appears.
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C: Oh. Thought you, uh, were gonna sleep until the cows dragged you home.
D: That's not the -- Never mind.
THE *claps* DOMESTICS *claps*
AWE Cass asked about Rowena. [ what was the ship name again? Rostiel?, Caswena?Witchywings?
AWE CAS ASKED ABOUT SAM. [SASTIEEEEL]
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D: I think they're both full of crap.
Of course they are, this is Supernatural. Cue painful montage! 
*jazz hands*
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Giulia: Poor sam
Zee: PTSD
Nat: Sammy :(
Giulia: They were his people
Sam and his fucking trembling lips
Nat: Aw Baby let me hug you
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[Dean eating]
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Giulia: Das me
Nat: I'm still hungry
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Zee: Damn that mouth. It’s big
Giulia: What does it do tho ? wiggling eyebrows
Zee: It eats!! Everything
S: Yeah, well... I'm leaving in ten.
C: Maybe I should go with him. And you can stay with Jack.
me : GASP YES
D: Why do you think he'll talk to me?
hE ‘S YOUR SOOOOON!
C: Well, because he looks up to you.
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Dean don’t you roll your eyes at your hub. It’s impolite.
D: I was not great with Sam, you know, when he was, uh...
STOP right there. Don’t give me flashbacks
D: Well, how am I supposed to figure that out?
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Cass, your Misha is slipping out, put that voice back into the cave it came out of 
C : Just talk to him. Get him to open up.
Audience : * SNORTS * yeah riiiight
C: Sleep until the cows come home.
D: There it is.
C: That's the saying.
*CLAPS* DOMESTICS
Nat: I'm hungryyyyyyyy
Zee: We’ve established that Nat
Nat: I mean.... APART FROM THIRSTYYYYYYYYYYY
Giulia: I’m eating nuts
Zee: I bet you are
Nat: Nut juice. Food against hunger and thirst. New Bumper sticker
Awe Cas is driving BB. [but where is the pimp mobile]
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S: I'm good, honestly
C:  YEAH I KNOW EVERYBODY IS GOOD
UUUUUH Cas baby, get me all tingly with your sarcasm
Also write that under the series main title as a warning really. 
SUPERNATURAL :  EVERYBODY IS GOOD
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Listen Sam, baby, I can hear your voice breaking, stop with the bullshit.
C is like....you can fill so much bullshit in that moose body
S: we don't have as many Hunters as we used to.
OUCH
Zee: Cas learnt how to use his badge
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Giulia: Lame
Nat: "We're FBI..."
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Look how cute my baby is...look at him *sobs*
C: Was it more "Scanners" 1, 2, or 3? 
OH WOW, IS CAS BEING DEAN RIGHT NOW?  (because I’m all for it.)
Giulia: I bet dean made him watch that.
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Nat: Charming Acres
Nat: I don't wanna live there
Giulia: I DOOOOO
Zee: It’s creepy ffs
Nat: It's all shades of fucked up. I mean, look!
LOVE IT
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C: It's like we're stepping into a Saturday Evening Post. I look at them sometimes after you fall asleep at night. They're very soothing.
I had to google that , not gonna lie. Also....HOW FUCKING CUTE IS THAT?! 
Giulia: DEM HAAAAAIR THO.
Giulia: FOXY WIFE
Zee: Foxy wife
S: What was that?
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Giulia: i love that time, minus the racism and patriarchy and the war.
Nat: What is wrong with these people
Giulia: Living my dream ok
Zee: Oh shut up babe
Nat: I don't like perfect
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Giulia: Cas and his bed hair
Giulia: DEM MILKSHAKES. I BET THERE IS SOMETHING IN THERE
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Zee: Something fishy, lass
Sammy likes them milkshakes tho
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Is it just my impression or Cas is running out of fucks this season?? I love it.
FLATFOOTS
Zee&Nat: We take care of each other.
mmm, don’t like that
Zee: Don’t like the way that sounded
Giulia: suspicious
Mayor: They said something about an aneurysm or something?
C:
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Zee: His head exploded
Nat: His head exploded
Giulia: OH NO HIS HEAD EXPLODED
Zee: Gotta love Cas
Giulia&Nat: Like a ripe melon on the sun
Giulia: GOTTA LOVE HIM
Sam panicking.
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S: "Like a ripe melon on the sun"?
C: It was an apt metaphor.
As I said : Angel out of fucks
S: Okay, well, maybe next time try to be a little less...apt.
C: The entire town is so strangely picturesque.
Giulia: I KNOOOOOW! , Can I go there?
Zee: NOOOOOOO
Nat: We wouldn't let you
Giulia: Dat dress.
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Nat: Bonding time
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Jack just gave the snake the cookie crunch , sobs so pure....for now
J: I think he’s sad
Nat: Have you tried bacon
Bacon....the solution to everything. I mean....not wrong, it’s delicious.
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Giulia:  so dorky
Sniffs Chinese food
D: Well, anyway, you and the, uh, snake...want to go for a little dri-ive?
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gets mice .
Nat: mice scare him?
ok but Dean is that squeamish sometimes . It’s hilarious.
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...because the mice scared me and I need confort. Also I’ll probably avoid Chinese food for a month so there’s that.
Nat: Ahhh... Jack really talks to that thing
Woman: Not people. Men. I only rent to young men. It's not proper -- young women living alone?
Nat: MORALS. GOTTA HAVE MORALS
*looks at Castiel*
Woman: You know.
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...C i like....what
me: sHe fLirtS
Nat: Ya still wanna go there, @Giulia
Zee: She’ll say yes
Giulia: YEAH. Y’all can’t stop me
Zee: See? I’ll tie you down bitch just watch
Nat: Ya CAnT LiVE oN YOuR oWn
Giulia: I’ll work at the diner
Time for some SNOOPING 
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Giulia: So much hand porn for me
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C: - they're...surprisingly passionate.
Sam with a tiny ass cup ready for some gossiping: Passionate how?
Castiel without a speck of blush: She spends, uh, quite a bit of time talking about the -- the shape and the heft of his --
Zee: Such a tiny cup
Please tell me there a DICK PICK in there lol
S: It's getting late, Cass. And you're right. I-I probably need some rest.
oh noe
C: You want to stay here? 
S: Why not? Ms. Dowling's making pot roast.
OH NOE
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Nat: I can smell head explosion
Zee: I can smell the bleach they’ll use
Nat: And there you go
Giulia: NICE  I can live in that fantasy idc 
Nat: You won't have us
Giulia: I wouldn’t know
Zee: Impossible. We’re seeped in your bones
Giulia: You can’t miss what you don’t remember
Nat: Yo head's going to explode when you remember, Giuls
D: Why don't you grub up? We still got another couple hours.
J: I'm not really hungry.
I DON’T LIKE IT
D: Give him one of these. I bet he's never had that before.
DEAN NO
J:  I don't think you have a firm grasp on what snakes eat.
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Zee: Uncomfortable dean
D: Yeah, I always thought they were kind of cool, though.
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Nat: Aww...adorable Dean
Giulia: I thrive out of these moments
Zee: Road trip with dad
D: Mm. Well, it's not the snake that's dangerous. It's their...bite.
J:  Is -- Is that a saying?
D: It is now.
Nat: hahah... is Dean looking with one he's going to pick?
Nat: Dad move
Giulia: Was that really a way to test jack? With CAKES
Nat: Dean move
Sam’s room is empty
Giulia: Weird Sam time
Zee: Not good
Nat: I told ya
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Giulia: Das me jamming
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Giulia: He so awkward
Giulia: HALLO!
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Giulia: No i don t eat.I'm looking for my partner.
Mrs B: Oh. The very nice, the very tall fella?
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Castiel angel of the lord? more like Castiel angel of I’VE RUN OUT OF FUCKS
Mrs.B: Hm. He said he's going for a walk. [pause ]  And a milkshake.
Giulia: Still me jamming,  ‘He’s got tan shoes with pink shoelaces’
Nat: yeah i mean, what's with her. all of a sudden a new husband?
Nat: My partner
Giulia: I’m looking  my partner
Nat: The tall man - yes the very tall man
Zee: The very tall. Man
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Giulia: I WOULD HAVE DIED. CAN HE GRAB MY HANDS TOO
Nat: Mr smith is gone long live Mr smith
Giulia: I would like a martini yes
Zee: I was waiting for this
C: Hair? ---He has beautiful hair?
Giulia: HE HAS
Nat: he has beautiful hair
Giulia: BEAUTIFUL HAIR
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Giulia: THIS IS COMPLICATED . Cas is like...... WHAT IS THIS I WAS NOT PROGRAMMED FOR THIS. PEOPLE . PEOPLE SKILL. NOT FUNCTIONING .
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Giulia: OH LOOK THAT’S MY MOM
Nat: what
Nat: the
Nat: fuck
Giulia: i’m loving this cas
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C: I'm so sorry, but last night, his head, um --
Giulia: he had to pause
Giulia: That laugh was creepy
Nat: How about that martini?
Mrs. Smith : No...my husband he’s good.
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[ SNORTS ]
Nat: OH god... no I need a drink
Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Giulia: ...
Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Giulia: EW
Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Nat: That pony tail
Zee: I don’t like this
Giulia: THAT’S SWELL
Nat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO JUSTIN NO GOOD
what’s up wITH THE FUCKING POT ROAST ?
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Nat: Honey, make me one too! Dammit
Giulia: SAME I NEED 5
Zee: A round of martinis please
C: This is not your house.
Justin!Sam : 
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Justin!Sam :  You're right. This is my wife's house. I am simply living here.
Giulia: OH YOU
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C: Something terrible's happened.
you right, those hair happened
Justin!Sam: I'm feeling adventurous.
Nat: Rawr ?
Giulia: NO
Giulia: I CAN T
Zee: I can’t process
Justin!Sam : So that's a no-no on the hooch?
I think Jared had too much fun in this. I WANT ALL THE BLOOPERS PLEASE PLEASEEEEE
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Giulia: I’m laughing so much
Nat: You watch your mouth
Giulia: SIR U WATCH UR MOUTH
Zee: Skedaddle
Nat: I don't wear a hat , dammit I.... uh
Zee: Bitch
Giulia: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT
Justin!Sam : Sir, using language like, uh, "H-E-double hockey sticks" --
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Nat: Wash your mouth out with soap?
Giulia: GUYS, I haven’t had this much fun on spn in a long time.
I can’t breathe
Zee: I’m dying here
Nat: Double hockey sticks?
oh....OH.....I GOT IT NOW....GOLLY...WHAT THE HECKIE
Nat: STILL WANNA LIVE THERE?
Giulia: YEAH SHUT UP
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Nat: ZETa
Zee: What?
Nat: Giuls is willing to leave us and go live there
Giulia: I LIKE THE AESTHETICS
Zee: As I said. Not possible. The amount of the insanity that she has shared with us won’t let her
Donatello : Ah, I am just the picture of health. Except for my prostate. It's shaped like a papaya.
...THANK YOU BB
also...do you guys think the Winchester get their prostate checked? or do they call.....Doctor Novak? (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)
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Nat: Dena really doesn't like snakes. Dean. Not Dena. Well, maybe Dena too. I wouldn't know
Giulia: We don’t judge
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Zee: Never
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Giulia: I LOVE HIM
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Giulia: God sister snacked on it
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Giulia: That’s a big ass cup
Nat: That's a big cup
Zee: Black hole
Giulia: ...
Giulia: This succession of texts is cursed
Nat: Not going there, Giuls
Zee: Again. I concur
Giulia: I ain’t said shit ya pervs
Zee: YET
Nat: You were thinking it. That's enough
Zee: ABOUT TO SAY IT
Giulia: You two were thinking it too , get off that high horse
Zee: offended gasp
J: And when it was gone, how did you -- how'd you feel?
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Donatello: Like...the galaxy. You know, Jack, our galaxy's all bright and shiny and spinny, but in its center lies this very large black hole.
Donatello: I'm all bright and shiny, obviously. Not so much spinny  But inside? Empty.
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Donatello : Losing your soul doesn't make you bad It doesn't make you anything. It's, um... an absence of...of pity, of empathy...of humanity.
J: I know I don't feel...nothing, but I don't feel the same, either. And maybe I just don't know what nothing feels like. Mostly, I just don't want Sam and Dean and Cass to worry. I just -- I need time and space to figure things out on my own, but everywhere I go, there's someone looking over my shoulder.
Giulia: I get that boo 
Nat: MAKE ME CRY JACK
J: Sam and Dean are the best men I know.
Nat:  FUCK YOU. I'M CRYING 
Donatello : whenever you don't want them to worry just think "WWWD" -- "What Would the Winchesters Do?"
Giulia: Pew pew pew pew pew pew. That’s what they’ll do. Sex stares. Bitchfaces. Bacon. Rocking off. Kill monsters. BOOKS. 
Zee: Kicking asses, taking names
Giulia: Kick names , take ass
Nat: there goes giuls
Zee: Oh babe!!!  Right there
Nat: I should not engage in this convo because it's going to be dirty
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Zee: He’s not like you?!
Donatello : I suppose the first question we must ask ourselves is, what is a soul?
D: Donny.
Donny: What?
Nat: He seems ok
Nat: SEEMS
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Donny: Jack's probably the most powerful being in the universe. [Creepy music starts to play....I sweat]  I mean, really, who knows what's going on inside his head?
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Giulia: I like donatello
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D [ with the anxiety of a thousands suns ] : ...thanks
Zee: Erotic musings
Giulia: Cas saying “steamy” and “erotic” is making me tingling
Zee: Rip it from your ...
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YOU KNOW WHAT HE CAN RIP OFF ME THO?
Nat: BAMF CAS
Giulia: And this too
Nat: Of course it's him
Zee: What are you ?
Nat: Sam's so tall
Zee&Giuls: The squint
Zee: Giuls shut up
Mayor: and no matter what I did, people would turn to drink or drugs, they'd move away.
Giulia: Oh boo hoo .Let me do drug in peace.
Mayor: ...And you know what happened next?
C:  No, but I have a feeling you're gonna tell me.
[I’m all out of fucks anyway ]
Giulia: THE SNARK
C: I won't hurt you, Sam.
Justin!Sam:  Golly, I told you my name is Justin!
Giulia: GOLLY
Nat: Justin!Sam is this a thing now?
Giulia: i hope
Zee: Giuls. That’s all for you. Cas kicking ass
Giulia: I know I’m sweating. Look at this shit
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H    O    T
Giulia: NO IDC ABOUT THEM LEMME SEE CAS
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C: Fight this! 
J S: Why? I'm happy in Charming Acres.
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Giulia: THAT’s US
Nat: That's us against Giuls
C: Sam, I know you want to be happy. And I know what it's like to lose your army. I know what it's like...to fail as a leader, Sam. But you can't lose yourself.
You have to keep fighting.
You can't lose yourself, because if you do, you fail us. You fail all of those that we've lost. You fail Jack. Sam, you fail Dean.
Nat: make me cry
Giulia: omg I’m crying
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Giulia: I’m cryiiing and I’m tired of seeing Cas and that fucking blade like that ok.STOP IT. [ going into MOC Dean ptsd ]
Zee: Lool
Nat: OH no no brain explosion please
Zee: I’m god
Giulia: We met god. God has a beard
Zee: God has a beard
Giulia: God is ma dad
Nat: NO
Giulia: YAS QUEEN
Zee: I like her now
Giulia: make his head go splat
Zee: Vegetable
Giulia: Psh lame
Nat: hey, not bad huh?
Giulia: Laaaaame
Zee: You needed the splat!
Nat: you know lame when you get there giuls
Zee: Nat. We’ve established we won’t let her
Giulia: BuT ThE dREsSeS
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Giulia: God dean
Nat: Dean stop being adorable
j: It was...illuminating
D ... the fuck, stop talking like your angel father.
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D: Heard you wore a cardigan.
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C:  Yeah, I told him about the cardigan.
S: Great. Thanks.
D: And the wife.
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Giulia: What about the ponytail
Giulia: Wait, Cas and dean talked about it on the phone [dies]
D: Well, not a lot of happy goin' on around here.
Nat: Wow, Dean feel a stab in his heart
S:  I hate this place right now. I hate it.
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S:  Everywhere I look, I see them. I see Maggie. I guess that's why, uh -- why I was so desperate to get out of here, why I kept running us ragged. But I got to stop that. I-I can't keep running. I -- This is my home.
This is our home.
Dean, I think I just need some time.
Giulia: Yeah same
Nat: Sammy babe
Zee: How couldn’t they have
Giulia: Awe this is the hurt Sammy season. Again
D:  Okay.
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Giulia: STAPH
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Giulia: WITH
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Giulia: THAT
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Giulia: LOOK
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Giulia: JARED
Zee: Sam needs a million years in therapy
Nat: You need help
Giulia: NO
Zee: Oh no
Giulia: I DON T LIKE IT
J: Sam and Dean would help you, so -- so I'll help you.
Nat:. Nah, Dean wouldn't
J: I'll help you see your friend again. 
Giulia: FUCKING
Nat: No
Giulia: NO
J:  In Heaven.
Nat: What
Giulia: JAAACK
Nat: Jack
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Giulia: THank god cas saw it
Nat: Wtf
Zee: Yeah. That wasn’t good
Giulia: Oh shuttttt uuuup
Giulia: PROMO
Zee: Dean in a suit. Alien vs predator
Nat: Creepy, me likey
Giulia: Eh
Nat: OK babes, i gotta go. Nat: See ya! it was a pleasure.
Zee: Always
Giulia: Go have some milkshake
.
.
.
If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.
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befitandchase · 5 years
Text
I just... can’t... today
My anxiety has been off the charts for the past 4 hours.
I turned on my laptop for the first time in over a week to go over resume suggestions that one of my wonderful followers sent me and it just hit me like getting slammed into a brick wall at over 100mph. My heart rate jumped, I began to hyperventilate, and I started shaking. I gave it ten minutes max thinking it would end soon, but then I got a text from my sister:
“Mom and dad are bringing over lunch in a few minutes.”
Guys, let me tell you, the last time I experienced panic like that, it was right after my accident and it basically paralyzed me for several hours straight, to the point where someone needed to be near me physically in order for me to calm down.
I have no idea how I managed to move, let alone have a full on lunch with my family feeling the way I did. The worst part was having to discuss job hunting because my parents won’t stop hounding me about getting a job with benefits. And then my sister chimed in with “well, why don’t you go into a completely different field?”
Um... no. I haven’t been paying back student loans for the past 13 years in order to go into another field! I mean, don’t get me wrong, I would absolutely LOVE to be a forecaster for the NWS, but that’s not gonna happen because I don’t have a BS. I have a BA from a prestigious art school where I graduated with honors. I’m not about to change fields after I’ve been designing for 17 years. (I started working as a designer the second I got out of high school, picking up not only my computer skills, but also necessary production skills for any graphic designer to have if they’re working in print.)
I wanted to fall apart after that. Thankfully, at that point, everyone decided to start working on chores outside, leaving me the hell alone, but that did nothing to abate my anxiety. Instead, I felt like even more of a mess. I felt useless. Like I couldn’t do anything at all to help out so I tried to keep Mocha calm and quiet while my dad did some electrical work in the living room.
My parents left about 45 minutes ago and as they were leaving, my BIL said something that really pissed me off about my responsibilities and I basically told him “Don’t start with me.”
I now have the headache from hell and my anxiety is nowhere near stopping. I just wanna curl up and cry. I’m exhausted. I’m tired. And I just flat out don’t feel well.
I’m so sick of everyone asking so much from me and giving so little back. To add to all my anxiety, I got a call yesterday from my boss’s husband. He started out by saying “this is between you and me. Don’t tell anyone else about this.” And I’m automatically thinking, “am I finally getting that well deserved raise?!” Nope. “How do you turn off a Mac?”
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Are you fucking kidding me? I have literally been on my feet all week doing production work, cutting paper, fixing the god damn printer after it went down, coming up with a creative solution to stop it from breaking down, and doing design work on top of that... WHERE THE FUCK IS MY RAISE?!
And don’t even get me started on the hiring of the other store’s graphic designer to “help” me. I’m not dissing her. She’s cool and actually stood up for me when Bitchass was about to blame me for a customer’s mistake. But if I’m doing over 75% of the hard labor on top of my actual job, I honestly think I should be compensated fairly. This girl is fresh out of college and only works on Macs. She doesn’t know how to do any of the production or how to use all of the Adobe Creative Suite. And I’m just
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She knows a few tricks I don’t, but the majority of design stuff is all me. 17 years worth of expensive both self taught and schooled into me and I’m only making $17 an hour.
I’m beyond irritated. I’m beyond angry. I’m just numb and full of anxiety that makes my jaw hurt from clenching it so hard and grinding my teeth. I can’t keep going like this. I can’t keep being the low man on the totem pole. I should be at the top of my game right now, but I’m just a loser stuck at a dead end job. I’ve been that loser for almost 10 years now, and I feel like I’m stuck.
Wow, so this rant went off the rails, but it was cathartic to let it out. Unfortunately the headache remains, but the anxiety has lessened to a dull ache in my chest.
I’m going to try and edit this resume and hopefully start sending it out this evening while my sister and BIL have their date night.
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