#the sexiest timeline
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I feel like we are all sleeping on the fan fiction potential given to us from Deadpool and Wolverine using their bodies to make a circuit with matter and anti-matter
Who knows what that could do to a person, you could write a fic where that caused anything your heart could think up.
#I might write one#I just feel like the options are limitless#everything from time travel to psychically connecting them#they can transported to the past and desperately look for eachother#they get transported to the future where they are married#they get a mental link and can hear each others every thought#poor Logan#the get transported to another timeline or reality#they get transported to the real world as Hugh jackman and Ryan Reynolds#deadpool is super chill because he already knew they were fictional characters#Logan is having the worst identity crisis ever though#maybe it makes them be able to see soulmates and they learn that they are soulmates#or it just gives them both super cool space powers#or it transports them in from of Loki god of time and stories#and he tells them that they are best friends in every other universe#endless possibilities#it’s literally matter and anti matter#we can say it did anything to them#transformed them both into their old bodies sexiest man alive 2008 and 2010#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#deadclaws#time ripper
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okay i need to sleep bc it's three am in the morning BUT.....
CONSIDER.........jackal time travel moment ala the experience with dorian except it's going Back in time
elf!jackal confronted by Fen'harel The Dread Wolf and he's D: trying to communicate with this poor terrified elf (dirthamen's it looks like but. not quite? and why are their vallaslin glowing??) and they're jus "I don't know elvish 👁️👁️ oh god. ohhhhh no oh fuck meee-" which just adds to his confusion bc. it's the primary/only language. how do they only know a few phrases here and there + what language Are they speaking in ??
smthin smthin they get home eventually but now they're
with the knowledge they have and also are hoping beyond hope that it's wibbly timeline shit and NOT actual time travel bc if Solas brings up "y'know it's odd...you remind me of this elf I met once. I'm only just now remembering them" they Will jump off a cliff
mostly due to the fact that the dread wolf went "shshsh it's okay, it's okay little one" and they heard "da'len" and IMMEDIATELY perked up, reflexively going "ar lath ma, vhenan" bc they're a sappy dope and listen they cant live down telling the dread wolf they love him BEFORE they started dating they just CAN'T !!!
(also alt version of this but it's human jackal and he's still Soft an Kind but also 👁️👁️ HELLO? abt it. bc i Don't remember when/where humans Exactly started popping up)
#jackals barks#ship: dread wolf take you#HKGKD#theres an alt timeline thats isekai!jackal also. but shape changing abilities so sometimes theyre elf jackal#theres many timelines they all exist in my brain at once its Whatevers Sexiest In That Second
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(PART 2) - WOLVERINE x READER x DEADPOOL — fuckup twinsies
dp&w spoilers!! + slight gore description --- part 1
Okay, recap.
Your perfect little day in dimension-travel-jail was interrupted. You almost got knocked out by two muscular men who came down from the sky like little drunk angels, who in turn happened to be famous characters. You don't know how you didn't realize earlier, guess timeline hopping also slowly melts your brain. You should really get an MRI exam sometime.
You almost passed out again when you realized you were chest-to-chest with Deadpool. Wade Wilson. Heart to heart. Body to body. Tip to tip, if that applies to you.
"You're real. I'm real. We're real." You deadpanned, stars almost twinkling in your eyes. No, maybe it wasn't the first time you've met a Deadpool. But this guy? He was the real deal. The original. How the hell did an original end up here?
"Pfft, you thought we were just drawings on paper? Two of the world's sexiest men in skintight costumes? Wrong. We're the real deal here, friendo. Can I call you that? Or will you try to kill me? You know I really didn't mean to crash into you I rea--"
"Alright, listen here. Wade, shut up. You," Logan pointed a finger at him then at you, still being embraced by Wade. "Do you understand any of the...nonsense he's talking about? Because I don't, and I don't. Have. Time for this. It's either you help me get out of here or get out of my way."
"Woah woah woah, since when did that 'we' turn into 'me'?" Wade reluctantly let go of you to walk up to Logan, his hands landing on his hips. "You're not the only one trapped here, you know, we're kind of all in the same boat here. We all fucked up our lives and it was definitely our fault bu--ACK"
You gasped, watching in horror as three silver claws stabbed straight through Wade's torso and out his back. Logan stalked closer, his scowl deepening. "Come again?" He taunted, his teeth grinding. Before Wade could get a word out, Logan turned his hand, twisting the blades inside of him.
"G-owww, FUCK. God, I swear this happened differently in another universe. Somehow hurts more this ti--" Logan stopped him again and began lifting him up in the air. By the torso. With his claws inside, being the only thing holding him up.
Your eyes widened, "Hey, guys stop that! Logan!" You yelled, taking a step forward, your hands held up in the air defensively.
Logan briefly glanced in your direction and grunted, tossing Wade to the side. “Move aside, bub. We need to settle some things.” Then he…lunged at Wade. They just started fucking fighting each other.
You backed up, watching everything go down. This could not be real. “I thought…you guys wanted out?” You muttered, your voice barely heard over their grunting and blades clashing.
“You know it’s true, so--argh, no hard feelings, right? Plus, I forgive you Wolvie.”
“I don’t give a damn about what you think, Wade. It’s all your fucking fault I was dragged into this. I was doing just fine without yo—“
“Just fine? You call spending all your days at bars and drinking all their supply just fine? While your life crumbles around you like a house of cards. If we were really on the TVA's watchlist, maybe they should've just sent us all to anger management sessions, huh?"
“Stop fighting!” You shouted in a voice heavy with irritation, grabbing a clump of sand from the ground and hurling it in their direction.
Logan, reacting instinctively, closed his eyes and shoved Wade aside, now choking and coughing violently. “What the hell?”
Simultaneously, Wade spun to face away, retching into the sand. “Oh god it’s inside of my mask. It’s in my face hole—“
Logan regained himself quicker than Wade, to where he immediately brushed aside the sand on his face and stomped towards you. You took a step back, by the sight of his fists clenched and white knuckles you swore he was about to beat you. “Waitwaitwait! I don’t have healing factor!” You rambled and held your hands out.
He paused in his tracks, his jaw visibly clenching as he tried to control his anger. Yeah, maybe he was used to taking out his frustrations on himself and now..Deadpool. But he couldn’t do that to you. You’re not even involved in whatever shit they got themselves into. You didn't deserve to get roped in their..mess, whatever it was. He let out an annoyed breath and swiveled away, seething internally. "I wasn't going to hurt you."
You slowly put your hands down, then looked around to see Wade still rolling on the floor. Upon hearing Logan, he snapped his head towards you both, the eyes of his mask widening. Before he could even get a little, tiny, miniscule word out, you spoke.
"ANYWAY...ehm..you both want out, yes? This is all one big mistake? I could help you. I've survived out here this long without being brutally killed." You forced a grin, facing the two. They blinked.
"Killed? What..who is in charge of killing here?" Logan narrowed his eyes.
Wade stood up to his feet, popping his wrist back into place. "There's--" His face under his mask soured, god he could still feel the sand particles crunching around between his teeth.
"ugh, there's others around? What kind of crazies would wanna live here?" He raised his arms, gesturing the vastness of this dystopian desert. Camera pans out, there's an echo to his voice, a tumbleweed passes by, you know what i mean
You scoffed, still very much salty about your own situation even though it's been years. "It's not like it was a choice. The only person could who take us out is Cassandra Nova, and she does not use her powers for that. She's basically with the freaking TVA, from what I know."
A singular laugh escaped Logan, his lips turning up in a knowing smirk, "Really now? How bad could she be?"
"Uh..let's see..multiple counts of murder, enslavement, power abuse, she's sadistic, evil, has a whole paragraph worth of powers. Unstoppable, basically?" You shrugged.
"I think we could get along."
"No, Wade."
"How do we get to her?" Logan crossed his arms. Perhaps he was the only one taking this seriously. You had gotten used to it already, but you too remembered how badly you wanted to leave this place at first.
"You two seem in a rush. "
"Yeah, well we're in a rush because I've got a whole-ass timeline to save, not to mention I also made a pinky swear to this guy over here. I promised the gruff-beard that I'd help him clean up his messy timeline, like a stain of last nights left ove-"
"Got it!" You exclaimed, interrupting him. "But uh, is that even possible? To..fix your guys' timelines, I mean."
"It better be," Logan glared at Wade. "Because otherwise, I'm going to tear you apart." He sneered, really making his point by leaning closer to him. These guys need to kiss already.
You nervously smiled. If another fight starts, you swear you were going to start ripping your own face off. "Okay! I know someone, guys! We'll all help eachother out, he's real nice, which means you probably won't like him--but he'll help! Follow me."
Oh, you knew someone alright. He was the most suburban-canadian guy you knew.
Lot's of dialogue in this, oops. This fic is kinda going off the plot of the movie, so I'm sure you know who you'll meet next! Leave ideas in the comments if you have any, since this fic is very freestyle and let me now...should i include the car scene we all wanted or too soon? GOODBYE! taglist <3 : @pink-jello-fish @radiantdanvers @superlegend216 @salted-snailz @wolfsune09 @jxssimae @remuslupinsfavoritebook @flannelforthetoads @rowanlovesmoonknight @bengewatch @i-shall-be-the-possum1 @kyriekurokami @marymustdie @tzurue @euinein @sophiemajokie @itsrainingtodayyy
#deadpool and wolverine x reader#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#gender neutral reader#x reader#gn reader#deadpool x reader#wolverine#wolverine x reader#deadpool x reader x wolverine#marvel#marvel x reader#deadpool 3#ils-dpw
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All Of Me
♪ take all of me, i just wanna be the girl you like—the kind of girl you like ♪
logan ‘wolverine’ howlett x fem!reader
tags: features your favorite merc with a mouth, takes place in deadpool three, age gap, flirting, mutual sex, rough sex, couch sex, creampies, mentions of drinking (don’t worry everything is consensual) sorry i don’t have much tags….
notes: listen to the song for added vibes ! |bottom of page|
“So? How does this look?” You turn to look at your friend and neighbor, Wade, as he modeled his off his brand new black wig. You took a long look at it, it was a stiff and a little dry; however it was different compared to the brown one he was rocking a week ago before his mission.
“Preferred the brown Justin Bieber one you had before. Now Wade, can we please have a game night? Pretty please!” You begged while the loud mouthed merc went silent and took off the new wig he brought before putting his red and black mask over his head.
“Game nights are such a hassle, Blind Al sucks at charades. Why do you want a game night so—oh” He paused and you swear you could hear him smirk behind his mask.
“You wanna do the hanky panky with old man logan, huh?” His eyes scrunched and he in your face, causing you to look away.
“Hide the zucchini with the Wolvie? Play naked twister? Prison role play? Recreating Busty—“
“Okay we get it!” You rolled your eyes and pushed his face away, heart practically beating out of your chest at the mere mention of your friend’s hot new roommate.
After the timeline altering mission, which you learned over chimichangas at Wade’s, you’ve had the pleasure of meeting the sexiest man to ever exist. Logan, was everything and then some. From his beautiful hazel eyes, to his voice down to his mutant powers; everything about him had you creaming your panties and Wade knew it too.
“Please, just one game night! That’s all i want, please Wade!” You begged once more, grabbing his wrist—making him turn to you. “What’s in it for me? Do i get a peek at the goodies too? Hm? Do I get to pop your cherry? Tongue Punch your fartbox? Eiffel—“
“A date and alone time with Vanessa” You cut him off before he could go on with anymore innuendos.
“See you tonight! Should i wear this one tonight?” Wade pulled out another wig, pulling it over his mask. It was ginger curly wig.
“Fuck no, Carrot Top” You snatched his wig off, making the merc pout.
It was a little bit after seven, the perfect time for you to show up at Wade’s place. You helped Wade send out invitations for the game night, which was at 6:30 pm. You decided to show up a little late, to make a grand entrance even though you lived right across the hall.
As soon as you got home, you immediately went to your closet picking out your best outfit, one that made your ass look so round and plump in it, before having the longest shower session ever known. After putting the last touches to your ‘i-wanna-fuck-a-twohundred-year-old-man’ outfit, you grabbed the pan of your famous monster nachos, and headed across the hall.
After you knocked twice on the door, it swung open revealing your mouthy neighbor; whom scowled behind his mask. “Well, look who decided to show up! I shouldn’t even let you in, Vanessa’s not even here!” He crossed his arms over his chest and got in your face, upset that you didn’t hold up your end of the bargain.
“Who’s not here?” Vanessa popped up behind you, her curly raven hair flowing as she moved, shocking your neighbor and making him back up from your space. You wore a smug look on your face as you walked into his apartment, pushing the pan of nachos into his hands and taking a look around his place; searching for Logan.
Wade, who had now taken off his mask and was eyeing Vanessa as she got comfortable, started to dig into your pan of nachos; until he see your face in his peripheral vision.
“Looking for Logan sugar bear? Wolvie went to go take Mary for a walk and to get us some beers—“
“And some coke!” Blind Al cut in, emerging from the kitchen; making you smile. “No, not this time Althea.” Deadpool responded, now standing next to you while the two of you watched the little old man lady make her way into the living room—cursing up a storm.
Turning his attention back to you, Wade stuck his fingers into your yummy pan of nachos and stuffed him down his mouth, “He’ll be back soon. Although he is over a hundred years old; so it might take grandpa a while to get back.” You pouted and grabbed some chips from the pan before stomping over to the living room and sitting on the black leather couch.
It felt like an hour had passed and Logan hadn’t showed up yet. You were trying your best to not seem sad, occupying your mind by talking with Yukio and Vanessa; earning some stares from Wade. You weren’t letting him speak to her, not until he showed up.
Almost like he heard you, the man of the hour finally walked through the door, holding a pack of beer and almost empty bottle of whiskey; followed by Mary Poppins skippering into the room.
“Look! He’s back! Everyone he’s back, with the beer! Hey Vanessa….” Wade announced to everyone before going to talk with Vanessa, but really it was for you. You shot your eyes up and caught his, giving him a soft smile before he quickly turned away and headed to the kitchen to put the beers down.
You hesitated on following after him, until you saw Wade motion for you to go after him. You excused yourself and walked into the small space, seeing the tall male place the beers into the fridge—you reached over and grabbed on, catching him by surprise.
The smell of his cologne piercing your nostrils and you tried your best to ignore the small throbbing you felt below. “Thanks for the beer.” You wanted to bite your tongue off after those words left your mouth. That’s all you had to say to him? Thank him for the beers?
Before you could leave, the deep voice behind you called out to you, “You’re the one that lives across the hall, right? You made those delicate shrimp tacos?” You nodded your head, a smile plastered on your face while taking a swig of the rich flavored beer.
“You think they were delicious?” You asked, already knowing his answer—however you were really excited that he knew who you were. He nodded and reached over to take a swig of your beer before responding.
“I had to sneak one because Wade wouldn’t let anyone have one, but god those were good.” You smiled and pulled another beer out of the fridge as he finished the rest off the first one you shared.
As it became later into the night, the two of you stayed in the kitchen getting know each other better. He decided to pull out the hard stuff, so instead of finishing off the pack of beer—the two of you decided to split his whiskey. The more the two of you talked, the more you fell for him.
“Who’s ready for some Strip Poker! I’ll go first!” Wade’s perky voice announced, making the two of you freeze and share a look with each other; faces contorting in disgust.
“I’d rather claw my eyes out then to see that. Let’s get out of here. What do ya say, princess?” He asked you, standing up and holding out his hand. You smiled and got up as well, bringing the whiskey with you. Walking out the kitchen and into the living room hand in hand, the two of headed to the door—surprising a half dressed Wade.
“Where do you two think you’re going?”
“To fuck off.” You responded, sticking a middle finger up at your neighbor before waving at Yukio and Vanessa; leaving the party and going to your apartment—getting away from Wade’s antics.
Sitting on your plush living room couch, the two of you continued with your conversation from earlier, the bottle of whiskey flowing freely between the two of you.
The older man couldn’t help but to take in your beautiful features, the way your eyes twinkled when he said something about his past, the way your beautiful plump lips curved up when he talked about a good memory he had—it had him losing his mind. He had found you attractive, he always did, but he was too afraid to act on his attraction. Too afraid for what could possibly happen….
“How are you still single?” You blurted out, the effects of the strong alcohol messing with your cognitive functions. He shifted in his spot and moved his eyes from yours, making you immediately regret asking.
“I’m not a good guy. I hurt people, every move i make….someone ends up getting hurt.” There was some silence before his eyes returned to yours and you couldn’t help the next words that left your mouth. You scooted closer to him and grabbed him by the chin, making him look at you, “What if I like being hurt?”
His eyes widened and he searched yours, processing what you just said before he gave into temptation; kissing you with such passion. He easily dominated you, gripping the back of your head—tugging onto your hair, making you moan out; which gave him the opportunity to pull away and look at you.
“I don’t wanna hurt you, princess.”
“I’m a big girl, Logan. I can take a little pain~” He wasted no time on smashing his lips against yours again, pulling you into his lap while his hands roamed your small back, before falling down to your ass. He squeezed both cheeks through your denim jeans, rubbing and pinching the fat—causing you to moan out his name. He was beyond hard hearing your sweet voice call out to him and you could feel it pressing right into your cunt.
You rolled your hips, creating some stimulation for you—another sexy moan leaving your mouth. He gripped the sides of jean’s hard, ripping them apart and causing you to gasp. “Can’t wait much longer. Sorry, princess,” His voice was gruff, panty wetting; turning you on even more. You reached underneath and fumbled with his belt buckle, finally unclasping it and unzipping his pants—pulling his navy blue briefs down; making his hard cock spring free.
You salivated at the sight. His deep brown happy trail lead right down to his glistening, angry, pinkish cock—jumping from the cool air. You let out a glob of spit, catching it once it hit his precum coated head—jerking him off. He closed his eyes and groaned, the sensation making his body grow hot. And when you pulled your panties to the side and let his tip slide against your slick lips; those tired looking eyes shot open.
“You ready for that, hm?” He asked, his bushy brown eyebrow raising as he watched you tease yourself; a soft gasp leaving your lips. With a head nod, you pushed him into your sodden entrance, gasping and gripping his broad shoulder; as he stretched you to fit his cock. Logan watched with low lidded eyes, in a deep lust filled trance as you took control, hands glued to your side.
“Fuck, princess….take all of it like a good girl…” He praised, sending a smack to your plump ass. You took him as deep as you could, however it wasn’t all of him…you couldn’t take it all. Your hips slowly moved on its on, grinding and bouncing—getting used to how much was inside of you.
Soon that bubble of pain popped and turned into pleasure, and your pace increased. Your hips were no longer bucking, instead you were practically jumping on his dick—the sound of skin meeting one another’s created a loud lewd noise; music to your ears—drowning out what was playing across the hall.
Logan couldn’t believe it, he was in pure bliss, he finally had you and was going to enjoy this very moment. He was scared, he didn’t want to bring his past into the new world—especially with you here.
Almost like you read his thoughts, you pulled him by his chin and made him look at you, “you don’t need to protect me…..I can take it—shit…just fuck me daddy.”
Hearing those words fueled him and he gripped your hips tightly, before pushing you further down onto his cock; making you take all of him. You gasped loudly, however you weren’t able to process it because he was forcing you up and down on his dick—stretching your gummy walls with each stroke.
He loved the sexy noises that left your pretty little mouth along with the squelching and small queefing that your cunt released with each powerful thrust. “That’s it baby…ride daddy’s dick. Fuck—you’re so tight!” You smashed your lips on his, a sweaty sloppy kiss between the both of you as the tightness in your stomach was brewing.
“G’na cum…fuck daddy! Can I cum? Please please please….” You begged, hands on his clothed chest—gripping his navy blue flannel shirt. The older man grunt and smirked, holding your hips while you continued to bounce.
“Go ahead and cream on daddy’s dick, princess.”
That’s all you needed to finally release that tight ball in your stomach, releasing your essence all over his thick shaft. He was right behind you as well, with a few more pumps, his thick milky white load pooled out in thick white ropes—filling you up.
The two of you stayed like that, peppering kissing on each other’s lips, a small smirk on his face. He was in bliss—no, he was in love. The hard ass Wolverine had finally opened his heart. He wasn’t about to make another universe hate him, he’ll damn sure try hard to not mess it up.
Sneaking away from his third round of strip poker, Wade crept into the hallway and picked the lock to your apartment door. Before entering he let out a little school girl giggle, before continuing to tip toe into your apartment—holding back his gasp at the sight bestowed before him.
A sweaty, shirtless Wolverine balls deep inside of you, giving you hard deep strokes as you laid on the couch taking all of him.
“The two of you need a third?” Their head whipped towards the door in sync, their faces of pleasure changing to anger.
“Fuck Off Wade!” He scurried back out the door, dodging the pillow being thrown at him. He took a deep breath before looking at the readers
“Welp! That’s all folks!”
#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine x you#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#logan howlett x you#logan howlett xmen#logan howlett smut#old man logan#logan howlett x reader#logan wolverine#wolverine#logan smut#logan howlett#wade wilson#deadpool#Spotify
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inspired by @andypantsx3. one day i promise i will write a shouto fic, but that day isn't today.
Algorithms are the devil.
Where they came from, you don't know. Probably some sick twisted baby borne from late stage capitalism. You also don't really know how they work, just that your social media feeds, despite your own careful curation to make sure that they only include pictures of cute animals and posts related to your favorite video game, get bogged down by other seemingly random posts that have nothing to do with you or your interests.
You guess sometimes it works in your favor, you look at a picture of a baby seal and get at least half a dozen more of cute adorable baby seals doing cute adorable baby seal things. But sometimes... sometimes it just doesn't.
Sometimes your feed— your timeline— your dash— gets poisoned, infected even. You're not sure how it works, but it cannot be pure coincidence that, after spending the weekend hanging out with your Pro-Hero loving friend, that your social media feeds are flooded with Pro-Hero posts. Someone meme-ing on Dynamight. Another proclaiming that Phantom Thief deserves to win Japan Hero of the Year. And a slew of posts raving about Earphone Jack's charity concert last week (Pro-Heroes throw concerts??). Your friend didn't touch your phone, you do not know what kind of sorcery this is.
Among the posts, you notice one of Shouto. It looks like some sort of photoshoot. Images of him in assorted outfits and poses; in a dress shirt, looking as if he's rolling up the sleeves— sweeping his hair back and out of his eyes, the white t-shirt he's wearing soaked and leaving nothing to the imagination— dressed in a dark blue yukata, hanging loose enough to give a tiny peek of his chest... You think that he could definitely make it as a model if being a Pro-Hero doesn't work out.
The photoset's caption reads 'A Closer Look at Shouto— One of the Sexiest Pro-Heroes of the Year' and you have instant understanding for all the thirst trap pictures. You're not a hardcore Shouto fan like your friend, but you can appreciate his looks. He is undoubtedly handsome.
You notice the pictures are in high definition and wonder if your friend has seen them. It takes only a moment for you to copy and past the page to send her way. Soon after, she replies; spamming you with eye emojis and two words.
Him arm.
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You are God’s bravest and sexiest soldier. Glad to live on the same timeline as you.
🫡🫡🫡
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Somewhere In Time is Literally Edwin/Charles, and here's why:
Just rewatched the movie Somewhere In Time because I thought it might work for a Paynland fic and holy fucking shit you guys it's perfect in every way. Charles is so Richard Collier coded and Edwin is so Elise McKenna coded it's not even funny. And the time periods are perfect???? Collier is literally from the late 70s/80s and time travels back to 1912???
Also William Robinson as the Cat King? Be still my beating heart.
(Spoilers for a movie from the 80s ig)
If you're unfamiliar with the plot, Somewhere In Time is about a playwright, Richard Collier, who, after being given a pocket watch by an old lady on the day of her death, begins to suspect that not only is it possibly to travel back in time, but he has already done it. He learns that the old lady used to be a beautiful young actress named Elise McKenna. He eventually manages to travel back in time, they fall in love only for him to accidentally get yanked back to the future just as they've begun to plan their life together. He dies from grief a week later and the two reunite in the afterlife.
Here are some scenes/dialogue that I think are so Edwin/Charles coded it hurts:
Collier (AKA Charles) decides to literally abandon his life and timeline after literally one (1) interaction with this lady + a pretty picture of her he saw in the museum section of a hotel and Charles would absolutely (and kinda did) do the same
McKenna (AKA Edwin) spent the rest of her life never giving up on finding Collier even though they were only together for a couple days. In her youth she's described as "quick and bright, fun, strong, and willful" but after he disappears she is described as "kind and thoughtful but too much within herself, like she was empty somehow" and you CANNOT tell me that does not sound like our favorite Edwardian boy
When Collier prepares to go to the past he picks out a time-appropriate suit, but when he gets there everyone keeps telling him its hella out of fashion and he is so offended 10/10, very Charles
I can practically hear Paynland saying this dialogue:
"Your occupation?"
“I’m a playwright.”
“A playwright.” (mad bitchiness in this line delivery)
“No, no I’m not here because of that!”
“Hm. And you say you know everything about me?”
“Well, yes.”
“Which is patently absurd. You couldn’t possibly know everything about me. We’ve never met. You’re a complete stranger to me.
“But then why did you ask, 'Is it you?'” (she asked this when they met the first time)
“I don’t have to answer that.”
“I know you don’t. I wish you would, though.”
When Collier asks McKenna to call him by his first name she hits him with the "Why should I?" and this doe-eyed fool says "I don't know. I just hoped you would."
Collier is terrified of the idea that McKenna would be afraid of him which is just so Charles like damn
When Collier tries to shave his face with the old-fashioned razor he does an absolutely terrible job, gets a bunch of cuts, and leaves shaving cream on his face and McKenna takes one look at him and decides this idiot is the man she's going to love forever
Their first kiss is actually the sexiest shit ever in this show like damn why they pulling up so hard in some random movie 40 years ago. ANYway when Collier touches McKenna's face and slowly leans in to kiss her she says in this breathy, barely heard whisper "Oh my God. I don't know what's happening." Which is very Edwin to me
When McKenna's manager gets too pushy about her romantic decisions she says "I am involved with you as an actress, Mr. Robinson. Not a doormat. Do not attempt to wipe your boots on me." okay Edwin
When McKenna is performing in the play (which is a comedy) she goes off script and starts dramatically monologuing all her inner thoughts about loving Collier while looking at him in the audience which Mr. "I know were in hell but I need to tell you I'm in love with you" Payne would definitely do
This is the monologue btw:
“The man of my dreams is almost faded now. The one I have created in my mind. The sort of man each woman dreams of in the deepest most secret reaches of her heart. I can almost see him now before me. What would I say to him if he were really here? Forgive me. I’ve never known this feeling. I’ve lived without it all my life. Is it any wonder that I failed to recognize you? You brought it to me for the first time. Is there any way that I can tell you how my life has changed? Any way at all to let you know the sweetness you have given me? There is so much to say. I cannot find the words except for these: I love you.”
"Are you alright?" "Yes" "I thought I lost you." "Never. Never, never, never."
The morning after they have sex she hits him with the "You will marry me, won't you?" And makes him choke on his food then immediately goes "You won't?!?!" without even waiting for him to respond
"I want to be everything to you." "You are."
This dialogue:
“The first thing I intend to do for you–”
“You’ve already done.”
“Well, the second thing.”
“What?”
“Buy you a new suit.”
“I don’t understand. Nobody seems to like my suit.”
“Oh can you blame them?”
“I think my suit is terrific. So what if it’s 10 years old?”
“At least 15.”
Collier just up and dying as soon as he gets back because he's so distressed at the thought of living without her he goes into a dissociative fit and doesn't eat for a weak is so Charles
If you made it this far, I commend you because I'm pretty sure I sound like an insane person and I don't even know if any of you have seen this movie but for the love of God I had to tell someone
Who knows, maybe I'll write a Somewhere In Time AU Paynland fic, or perhaps I'll just sit here and desperately hope that someone else will do it
#dead boy detectives#payneland#painland#paynland#charles x edwin#edwin x charles#somewhere in time#alternate universe#au idea#fic ideas#someone write this please im losing my mind
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OBSESSED w the “ford tries to seduce stanley by doing porn plot shit”, & i wanted to suggest something — you should totally utilize the stan o war ii. plenty of porn that takes place on a boat/ship, but even if there wasn’t, “a pair of twins alone on a ship in the middle of the ocean where no one could see them do anything, oh also they basically have no privacy from the other at all” just… sounds like perfect porn plot material. not quite sure what you’d do with that — stan walking in on ford masturbating’s really the only thing i can think of — but it’s good.
also, i found a collection of stupid porn plots, and one of them had a guy’s step-sister suddenly become a nudist. i feel like that’s something you could work with.
But seriously I love these ideas LOL. I think ultimately anything Ford tries fails epically, but the conclusion is that all he had to do was talk to Stan (challenge level: impossible)
I’d need to figure out how the boat fits into the timeline though since in my head this is all before they go on the trip. Maybe it’s when they’re working on fixing up the boat / testing it out, Ford shows off his ~assets~ to get Stan interested. But with both Ford and Stan distracted, they don’t notice a monster coming and they wind up getting hurt in a non-sexy way. Or maybe they just both get really bad sunburns and blame each other 😂
Ford: Oh no~ I seem to have dropped my sub dimensional multi tool. The sexiest of all tools! (Bends over and shakes his butt)
Stan: 👁️👁️
The kraken: THIS IS MY TIME
And Ford pretending to become a nudist is so funny. poor confused Stan being worried he’s being mind controlled again. Soos being traumatized. Incredible.
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Percabeth dance au/baby fic
Twice Upon a Pointe baby au is on the way I promise. Here's a preview! M rated for baby making
A month before their wedding, Annabeth handed Percy a detailed schedule of when she wanted to have kids.
Kids were a must for Percy, but he didn’t care how or when they happened. They were obviously much more of a sacrifice for Annabeth, who wouldn’t be able to dance on stage for many months, functionally sacrificing nearly a year of performance time in an already short career. He told her that they could wait until she was older, start sooner, find a surrogate, or try to adopt. Anything worked for him.
Annabeth was not as much of a go with the flow person. She had the timeline of their family mapped out. They’d get married shortly after she turned thirty, and they’d start trying a year and half later. They wanted two, maybe three kids, and she wanted at least a year of dancing in between.
“I want to make sure I’m dancing for The Nutcracker when I’m thirty-six, since that will be my twentieth anniversary with City Ballet,” she said, pointing to this break on the schedule. “So if I’m not pregnant by November when I’m thirty-five, we need to pause.”
Percy looked at the time line. The hard deadline for babies was when she was thirty-eight. “I want to make sure I still have a few more good years of dance too,” she said.
“This is remarkably thorough,” Percy said. “Trust me, I’ll do my best, but these things don’t always go according to plan,” he reminded her.
She just kissed him. “I’ve built in plenty of wiggle room.”
~
When Nutcracker season ended Annabeth had an appointment to have her IUD taken out. Birth control was replaced with neonatal vitamins, and spontaneous passionate sex was replaced with obligatory every-other-day sex (something about higher sperm counts). Percy couldn’t exactly complain, though.
They’d been married for a year and a half, and so, according to Annabeth’s plan, it was time to get moving on baby number one.
Really, they were both bouncing off the walls excited about their next step. They avoided telling people they were trying -- “It feels weird to announce to people that we’re fucking bare back regularly,” Annabeth had said -- which added to the excitement. Even before the baby was conceived, they had a little secret between the two of them.
But by April there was still no baby.
They had promised each other that sex wouldn’t become a chore, that they’d find ways to keep it interesting. But it was starting to drag on them. The Spring season didn’t make it any easier.
Chiron had put another two weeks of Sleeping Beauty on the program, but he did it at the end of Spring for maximum exhaustion.
Percy and Annabeth stumbled into their apartment, Percy already on Uber Eats to lock down dinner and fast, both exhausted from hours of rehearsals for Beauty and then a night of performances of ballet rep.
“That was easier five years ago,” he complained, flopping onto their bed while Annabeth shuffled into the bathroom. He picked out her favorite tacos, selected sauces on the side, and threw in some extra chips and guac before getting on with his own order selection.
He’d almost made up his mind when Annabeth opened the bathroom door and sighed heavily.
“Terrible news,” she said.
Percy sat up in a panic. “What? What is it? What happened?”
“I’m ovulating. We need to have sex tonight,” she said.
It was supposed to be an “off night,” where the sexiest thing they did together was eat take out.
Percy flopped back onto the bed, sighing dramatically. “Oh will the horrors of this day never end!?” He cried out in mock-distress. “Come here, gorgeous,” he said, opening his arms to her. She crawled into his embrace. “Let me just place this order. I’ll have you knocked up before the food arrives.”
Their sex was very … Catholic: relatively passionless, missionary position, all in the service of reproduction.
Percy was still a good man and a better husband. He made sure there was enough foreplay to make sure she got off at least once, but the actual penetration was … well, fine. It did the job. Or, more like he did his job.
Percy finished with a grunt, burying himself inside her as she moaned. He leaned down and kissed her as he pulled out. It wasn’t the most exciting sex they’d ever had -- not even close -- but he still felt the incredible intimacy of the moment.
He kissed her again, letting his hand tangle up in her hair, as another one lingered down to her belly.
Four months. Four months of sex every other day, in positions optimized for conception, and he still hadn’t been able to get her pregnant. She’d been pregnant once before he knew, back when she was twenty-one and with another man. Annabeth hadn’t kept it, but the sheer existence of that clump of cells in her past meant that if there was a fertility issue, it wasn’t hers.
He kissed his way back up, planting one on each breast, then each collarbone, before finally meeting her lips.
“What if it doesn’t happen?” He asked through the kiss.
“It will,” she promised. “It’s only been four months. There’s nothing to worry about.”
He nodded, although hardly comforted by her assurances.
“Will you hate me forever if it doesn’t?” He asked.
“Hate you forever?” She asked, resting a hand on his face, forcing him to look at her. He could feel the metal of her wedding ring against the skin of his cheek. “Of course not. Percy --” She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in close of a hug. “Remember what you told me? That these things don’t always go according to plan. If it doesn’t happen, we figure out a new way, okay?”
Percy nodded into her shoulder.
“And if it doesn't, we don’t know that it’s you,” she added.
“You’ve been pregnant before,” he said.
“Ten years ago, before birth control, before several mental health crises. A lot can change,” she said. “You wouldn’t hate me if it didn’t happen, would you?” she asked. Her tone wasn’t the same as his genuine worry. Percy could tell she was just trying to make her point: if he wouldn’t hate her, of course, she couldn’t hate him.
Percy kissed her forehead. “Impossible. I could never. That you are willing to do this at all is such an incredible act of love, I can’t even --” his voice broke.
Annabeth’s eyes started to well with tears too. They almost always did whenever Percy got emotional. Her empathy overwhelmed her. Unlike her, he hardly ever cried, so she knew if he was close it was … a tear traced its way out of the corner of her eyes, and Percy wiped it away, only for several more to follow. Soon her eyes were welling with tears too. Christ, they weren’t even pregnant yet, and they were both already emotional disasters.
Annabeth pulled him down for another kiss. They let that one linger as Percy wiped the tears that had escaped the corners of her eyes and traced down to her temples.
Their moment was disrupted by a knock at the door. “That’s the food,” Percy said, pulling himself up and off of her. She had to lay there for at least fifteen minutes to give it its best chance.
Percy came back in with the bag and a roll of paper towels to keep the bed clean. When he stepped back into the room, he let himself take in the sight of his wife laying there, naked and gorgeous, her legs open slightly, as if waiting for him, the evidence of his recent presence inside her dripping out.
When they’d stopped using condoms years ago, trusting just her birth control, he’d been so turned on by the sight of his cum leaking out of her it usually led to a second or third round. Now, it was almost disappointing. Come on boys, get back in there. You’ve got a job to do, he tried to communicate with his sperm.
Annabeth propped herself up on her forearms. “Are we really going to try and eat tacos in bed?” She asked.
“I know you’re hungry. I’ll feed them to you and keep the bed clean,” he promised.
“You’re the perfect man, did you know that?” She asked.
“I do my best,” he said. He mostly ended up feeding her chips and guac until she felt like sitting up.
“Could you get me a washcloth,” she asked, scooting herself up. Percy wet one under the bathroom sink, hoping the water wasn’t too hot or cold.
She dropped it on her nightstand when she was done using it between her legs. “If I don’t get up and wash my hands, will you judge me?” She asked, reaching for a taco.
“You had my entire dick in your mouth twenty minutes ago,” he reminded her. Annabeth was super hot, but seeing her naked wasn’t enough on its own to make him spontaneously hard and ready for baby making. The number of blow jobs he received had gone up in the last few months, but the number of blow jobs he got to completion had gone down to zero. He was under strict instructions to finish in one place and one place only. It was the best of places, sure, but he could do with a little variety here and there.
“Great,” she said, chowing down without much care.
“You know, if you get pregnant tonight, you’ll be pregnant for Sleeping Beauty,” Percy reminded her.
“I know,” she said, a bite of food in her mouth, but still managing a smile.
“Do you think you’d still be able to do it?” He asked.
She nodded. “I’ll be what? Four weeks? We might not even know yet.” She took another bite.
Percy nodded. “Doesn’t matter, though. We don’t know if that one worked,” he said.
“One of them will,” She promised, but in her eyes he only saw a desperate look of hope.
Logically, he knew that, if that were the case, they’d move onto another plan. But they were both so ready, and so hopeful. It needed to happen some time. And, Percy hoped, sooner than later. There was only so much more Catholic Church-approved intercourse he could keep having.
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There's been a lot of debate about the timeline on the show. But, I still can't figure out how old the sexiest firefighter according to People magazine is. The dating site says he's 52. In 2018 that is the first season, Buck has been in part 118 for half a year now. So here it is: 24-18=6
So if we add 52 to 6, we get 58 years. But Bobby says Buck has been in the unit for seven years. So we're 52 adding up to 7. That's 59 years. But the wiki says Bobby was born in '68, which makes him 56.
2024 - 1968=56
So how old is this guy? Give him a birthday party so we can find out not only his birthday, but also his years.
I need to see Bobby being congratulated by his family. Giving him presents and telling him words of love. Athena's gift of incredibly attractive lingerie on her hot sexy body. And Bobby's love-fucked and aroused look at his lovely wife.
I literally need to see Bobby Nash's naked torso and Athena Nash's shapely legs to my heart's content.
#peter krause#bobby nash#angela bassett#athena nash#athena grant#athena grant-nash#oliver stark#evan buckly#911#911 on abc#911 season 8#911 show#bathena
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More Jesiah (darlin) headcanons YIPPIE
(Changed pronouns to he/they)
(Some about Quinn and stuff so cw/tw for him in general and mention of drug/caffeine addiction and abuse cuz he’s a grimy bastard)
@dukecollinsbf
Jesiah first met Quinn as a teenager around a club somewhere and they simply exchanged greetings and left but then he met him again as a young adult and reconnected, probably getting a drink and beginning to date (idk their age around here I gotta figure out the timeline. Maybe 22-24??)
Got tattoos and piercings under Quinn’s influence since they were rlly naive and believed he was doing what was best for them
Gained an addiction due to Quinn enabling and feeding into their caffeine and drug intake
Got into big fights with Quinn all the time, ended up going half blind in their left eye because he scratched a little too deep (still got 20/20 vision tho 😛)
(It’s either canon or a universal headcanon) Jes has vamp bites all around his body that were too far gone to be healed so they remain pretty permanent till they gradually heal up by themselves
Has a sleeve of tattoos he got to cover up the smaller tattoos Quinn pressured him into getting (very intricate designs and even has some matching with David, Asher, & Milo)
He has multiple earrings; a septum, eyebrow piercing, snake bites, dog bone tongue piercing (ty vere for this idea ily), jacobs ladder, and that’s it :3
Jesiah’s jewelry consists of his piercings, the key necklace that never leaves their body, and dog tags.
Doesn’t like crowded places and can only bear them with Sam
Cis male and 6’, like an inch shorter than Sam and 3 inches shorter than David
Favorite Sanrio character is Kuromi
Likes to bite (Sam) as a form of affection and intimacy and leave marks
Will drape themself over anyone laying on a couch
Uses puppy eyes subconsciously and denies it all the time
Bisexual, male leaning
Is in the mood almost 24/7 and finds Sam hot in literally any circumstance
They probably wear little hello kitty backpacks in public over their dark ass clothes
Literally the sexiest man alive, has people constantly turning heads on the sidewalk
Their muscles bulge in compression shirts and pants/sweatpants.
Always wearing some form of army pants and boots, if not wearing boots then just wearing socks everywhere but in bed.
Very visible happy trail when they wear anything low on the hips (oh my god)
Unconsciously flirts with people and has no idea he’s arousing everyone around him (His dumbass has no idea he’s even considered attractive)
Somehow so pretty when he’s covered in blood (I’ll stop thirsting over him now)
(Just kidding) Underside of their hair is dyed a red-orange
Didn’t like Angel at first because he thought they were invasive + he’s protective of David
Okay I’m done 😋 maybe more later or tmr I’ve been tired
#redacted asmr#redacted audio#redacted darlin#redactedverse#redacted sam#redacted headcanons#bookmark !#4 myself
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god i wish we had gotten more of twelve with river song. he just meshes so well with her and since their time streams are finally (almost) synced up you don’t feel the imbalance of maturity/knowledge that you get in a lot of eleven’s time with her, and less general timeline “where are they right now what the fuck is happening” fuckery to sort through. just a husband and wife who have lived so much together and know it’s coming to an end very soon so they have to relish it (even if river doesn’t have the knowledge of her own death the way the doctor does, she knows it’s almost over because her diary is running out of pages). and i love watching this older, less theatrical, more rough-around-the-edges doctor with her because it develops their dynamic and the passage of time for the doctor so well. he's not eleven, trying to hide the pain and damage anymore. he doesn't spin off lies and deflections. he wears the hurt and is comfortable in it, and river is there to bring the joy and wonder out. they just have a more mature, beautiful relationship to me.
more thoughts and elaboration under the cut bc i care for your dash <3
twelve and river were such a delight to watch because (this is getting into hot take territory here sorry) once capaldi took over from matt smith, the show basically gave up on the whole “the doctor is very attractive and all the women want him” narrative that it pushed for eleven. of course it was there with ten but i think it got Egregious with eleven. moffat really wanted us to believe matt smith was the hottest man in the universe (and he’s not unattractive! i admit i thought he was attractive when i first watched doctor who years and years ago! the writing was just over the top with it!) twelve is not some young whimsical prettyboy anymore— he’s abrasive, blunt, and old. the show doesn’t treat him like he’s supposed to be attractive, which makes him and river’s relationship feel so real.
first off i want to point out that river is still very much attracted to the doctor in his new body which was so exciting for me because how often to we get to see romance and desire and (sexually) intimate relationships in people past the age of 35??? hardly ever! how often do we see a beautiful woman expressing desire for a man that’s not young or conventionally handsome NOT because she has ulterior motives or we’re supposed to believe he’s actually the sexiest man alive but because she simply loves him? how often do we see relationships where no matter how much change they go through, even when one of them has turned into an entirely different person (figuratively or literally), the love stays steady and unchanged? especially when these changes involve aging? there isn’t nearly enough. and seeing it is kind of healing for me, just a reminder that you can have love and intimacy and passion even when you’re not “young and beautiful” anymore
twelve and river’s relationship is just charged with so much shared experience and trust and i wish we had gotten to see more of it. in conclusion i want a special that recaps the 24 years on darillium thank you and goodbye
#they had twenty four years…#all that time to just live and be husband and wife#all that time for her to learn all the ins and outs of the new him#and all the ways for him to work through how he can express love in the new body#as twelve rather than eleven#and getting to see that she loves him just the same in every form#idk i’ve been thinking a lot about aging lately#i know im young but i have a bit of a fear of it because of how society pushes the whole ‘past your prime’ narrative#especially for women who are taught that they lose value once their ‘youth and beauty’ fades#like i said seeing relationships like these is healing#doctor who#twelfth doctor#river song#the husbands of river song
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Timeline: Part 7 - October 2017
For earlier timeline posts: click here or here.
There are three installments of the "Meghan's PR Timeline" today, which will see us finish out 2017: October 2017, November 2017, and December 2017.
One particularly interesting observation about this period of time is that from mid-October to mid-November, there are actually whole days without a single item or piece about Meghan. It's very strange because from about the end of April 2017 to the end of September 2017, we were being bombarded DAILY by stories about Meghan.
Is the missing coverage because those pages, stories, and articles were scrubbed in 2018/2019 when Meghan's PR was cleaning up her image?
Did Meghan finally get the ring in early October and no longer needed her PR to pressure Harry and force him to propose?
Or is it the quiet before the storm (i.e., the engagement announcement)? Meghan decided to drop coverage to get more bang when the engagement was announced?
10/1/2017: Toronto Invictus Games Closing Ceremony. Meghan, Doria, Jess, and Markus arrive early and are in a box. Meghan arrives first and is caught directing photographers where to go and what angles to use. Harry arrives later. Meghan leaks that Harry and Doria met at the closing ceremony and they get along fabulously.
(For additional context timeline-wise: 10/1/17 is the Route 19 Harvest Festival shooting in Las Vegas)
10/2/2017: Harry returns to London via Heathrow Airport and it's listed in the Court Circular. Meghan teases an engagement to E News and says that her friends have become Harry's family.
10/3/2017: Meghan merches her shoes from a September 2017 papwalk. She also tells Elle Magazine that she and Harry are unofficially engaged, and everyone knows.
10/4/2017: Meghan modernizes the monarchy if she marries Harry. Charles is in Malta.
10/5/2017: Ronan Farrow's Weinstein expose is published by The New York Times. Meghan merches her Invictus Games clothing - Opening Ceremony Outfit, Closing Ceremony Coat.
10/6/2017: Carole Middleton and Doria Ragland are the same.
10/7/2017: Charles's letter to Tony Blair about the hunting ban is published.
October 7th is the first day with no Meghan stories or Harkle coverage since early summer.
10/8/2017: Meghan has moved to London and is being driven by a royal chauffeur.
10/9/2017: Harry's ex Cressida makes the news for being connected to Harvey Weinstein. Jess Mulroney sources an "all about Meghan's bestie, Jess" story.
10/10/2017: Meghan's PR takes a dig at William and Kate, asking why they never hold hands. Kate makes her first public appearance since announcing her third pregnancy, implying that she is on the mend from HG.
10/11/2017: Meghan's 2011 film, Dysfunctional Friends, resurfaces. Her character is a photographer for male underwear models. Meghan tries to be a fashion influencer, gets linked to Julia Roberts, Naomi Watts, and Greta Lee as a major "power dresser". She also merches the nail polish she might wear for the wedding and/or the engagement announcement.
Meanwhile, Harry attends the 100 Women in Finance Gala Dinner. Kate's aide, Rebecca Deacon, receives the Royal Victorian Order. Buckingham Palace announces that Charles will lay wreaths at the Cenotaph for The Queen during the Remembrance Sunday service, and The Queen returns to London, ending her summer Balmoral haloriday.
10/12/2017: The Queen's first day back in London/work following summer holidays. Harry has #1 sexiest celebrity beard. (No, they're not talking about Meghan. They mean the actual hair on his face.)
10/13/2017: Meghan and Harry leak that they're house-hunting in the Cotswolds for a marital home and merch a few properties in the Daily Mail. Meghan also teases wedding speculation and Soho Farmhouse's newest financial report reveals that they lost $34.48 million in 2017 (hence the Harkle sponcon throughout 2018)
10/14/2017: Royals living in the US - forgotten Spencer cousins who call the American Pacific Northwest home.
10/15/2017: Meghan confirms that she is finished with Suits when Season 7 wraps in November. #MeToo movement begins and James Middleton, Donna Air split is revealed.
10/16/2017: Meghan leaks that she and Harry are already engaged but won't announce it until Suits filming has ended. Harry attends the WellChild Awards. Also, Harry tells people that he doesn't want a formal pageanty Cambridge-like wedding.
Meanwhile, Harry accompanies William and Kate to an engagement celebrating the release of Paddington 2.
10/17/2017: No new Meghan or Harkle stories, but Eugenie is papped in Los Angeles; William and Kate announce the baby is due in April; and Camilla gives a landmark speech on osteoporosis.
10/18/2017: Meghan leaks to the Daily Mail that she and Harry had tea with The Queen at Buckingham Palace on October 12th, and it's the first time Meghan met Her Majesty.
Note: This version of events contradicting Harry's claim in Spare that Meghan met The Queen for the first time on Sunday at the Royal Lodge while visiting the Yorks. October 12th is a Wednesday.
10/19/2017: Meghan teases Harry's proposal plan.
10/20/2017: Meghan's copycatting of Diana's outfits and behavior finally gets noticed. Meghan hints about etiquette lessons and teases the engagement.
Samantha Markle sets up a gofundme to raise money for an accessible home as her MS progresses, capitalizing on Meghan's fame.
10/21/2017: No new Meghan or Harkle stories.
10/22/2017: No new Meghan or Harkle stories.
10/23/2017: Harry has an away day in Lancashire.
10/24/2017: Meghan makes a dig at Kate - why she never wears red nail polish.
10/25/2017: Meghan merches her voice (perhaps this is when she starts negotiating for a Disney documentary voiceover gig...).
10/26/2017: DailyMailTV discusses Meghan's ancestry. Meanwhile, Harry and Meghan leak that:
Harry has had a crush on Meghan since 2015 when he saw her on Suits and he did tell friends back then that she was his ideal woman.
KP aides have been instructed to begin wedding planning and are reviewing dates.
The Cambridges announced Kate's pregnancy early because protocol requires the wedding can't take place until after the baby is born.
10/27/2017: Channel 4 broadcasts a "10 Things About Meghan Markle" documentary.
10/28/2017: Meghan and Harry are actually related! They're distant cousins.
10/29/2017: No new Meghan or Harkle stories.
10/30/2017: No new Meghan or Harkle stories.
10/31/2017: Harry is in Chicago to attend the Barack Obama Foundation Summit, and Charles and Camilla are in Singapore for royal tour.
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Venom Team-ups and Throwdowns
I feel compelled to make Venom educational posts to aid the fandom with art and fanfiction fodder.
A non-exhaustive list of dual appearances and fights. Excluding Spider-Man and Carnage because...duh...
I don't know why I've made this.
Team-ups
Morbius-Venom: The Enemy Within
Vengeance-Venom: Nights of Vengeance
Wolverine-Venom: Tooth and Claw
Daredevil/Matt Murdock-Venom: On Trial
1st Thunderbolts team (Ellis, '07-'08): Moonstone, Songbird, Radioactive Man, Swordsman, Speedball/Penance, led by Norman Osbourn/Green Goblin
Dark Avengers team (Bendis, '08-'09): Sentry, Ares, Noh-Varr, Moonstone (disguised as Ms. Marvel), Bullseye (disguised as Hawkeye), Daken as Wolverine
(Dark Avengers is FUCKING WEIRD. This is Mac!Venom...pretending to be Spider-Man. Just...let that one...sink it. But it also has one of the sexiest set of panels in existence.)
Secret Avengers (Remender, '12-'13): Giant-Man, Captain Britain, Human Torch, Black Widow, Beast, Valkyrie, Ant-Man, led by Hawkeye
2nd Thunderbolts team (Thunderbolts Red, Daniel Way, '13-'14): Electra, Punisher, Deadpool, led by Red Hulk
Guardians of the Galaxy, 2 different times
Moongirl and Devil Dinosaur-Vol. 3 (Costa '16-'18) #151-153
ADDED
X-Men Blue (Bunn, 2018) #121-122 and Vol. 3 162-163: Iceman, Beast, Cyclops, Angel, Jean
1st Savage Avengers team: Eddie!Venom, Conan, Wolverine, Punisher, Elektra
2nd Savage Avengers team: Agent Anti-Venom, Conan, Black Knight, Cloak and Dagger, Elektra!Daredevil, Weapon H
Notable Conflicts
Punisher-Venom: Funeral Pyre
Juggernaut-Venom: The Madness
The Hulk-Incredible Hulk vs. Venom
The Xenophage-Venom: The Hunted
Nova -Nova 6-7 ('99)
Wolverine-Vol. 1 by Daniel Way
New Jack O'Lantern- Venom Vol. 2 by Rick Remender
Stegron-Vol. 3 (Costa '16-'18) #151-153
The Poisons-Venomverse/Venomized
Knull-Vol. 4 (Cates)
His fucking self from another damn timeline-Vol. 5 (Ewing)
Killgrave/The Purple Man-Venom: Separation Anxiety '24
Deathlok: 2nd Savage Avengers
Other
Beyond! ('06-07)-also features Henry Pym, Wasp, Gravity, Medusa, Firebird, Kraven, The Hood, Deathlok; dropped on Battleworld and told to FIGHT
New Avengers Annual '11 & Avengers Annual '12-Eddie!Anti-Venom joins The Revengers and fights The Avengers
Venom Vol 2 #7-Flash!Venom and Eddie FIGHT the first of a few times going forward.
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Listen, if Ed Boon asked me to write official tie-in novel filth for Mortal Kombat, I would. I don't care if he sends a studio note that says "If you make Sub-Zero any gayer I'll rip your fucking head off," I'd still work for him. Who needs a head anyways. Love that guy.
Anyways here's a wonderwall of filth.
[🔞🔞🔞Check below the cut🔞🔞🔞]
Explicit, Spicy, Juicy, and definitely🔞🔞🔞past this point
I should mention- You can actually read all of my writings directly on my masterlist without logging in to tumblr.
◜Sub-Zero, Smoke, Liu Kang options - Please Be Bi-Han 🙏◞
Just use any browser app and type in mk1erotica.netlify.app in the browser's address bar to access my masterlist from anywhere on any device.
Yes. Any device. This may even work on an Apple watch, on the Parrity browser. You can probably ask Siri to open a browser and navigate to the masterlist. You can use any browser. You can use Safari, Chrome, Brave, Firefox, Microsoft Edge. It can work on a Roku if you have a web browser like Web Browser X or Xfinity. It will run on ųBrowser or Opera. But I recommend DuckDuckGo!
Multi-Character Choose your own MK1 Adventure
Reptile [Syzoth, MK1 Version]
◜ mk1 men using their powers in the bedroom part 1 of ?◞
Sub-Zero [Bi-han, MK1 version]
Neck tattoo imagines parts 1 2 AND 3
◜ mk1 men using their powers in the bedroom part 2 of ?◞
◜ mk1 men using their powers in the bedroom part 2 of ?◞
◜I Need Attention◞
◜mk1 Sub-Zero: sexiest angst trope?◞
Johnny Cage [MK1 Version]
◜ mk1 men kinks & darker motivations part 2 of ?◞
Scorpion [Kuai Liang, MK1 version]
Beta Tester [Can be read as Hanzo if you're imaginative]
Bloody Horny Kuai Liang Scorpion - https://www.tumblr.com/gamerwoman3d/737285442221801472/%F0%9D%9F%B9
BONUS MATERIAL
Skins That Would Be in MK1 If I Had A Voodoo Doll of Ed Boon [Fun, Sexy skins for Kenshi, Scorpion, Kitana, & Sub-Zero]
The Gollum Test [Essay about writing better x readers]
Sub-Zero Long Hair Posts[linked without box because of tumblr post limitations]
Part 2 : Sub-Zero Long Hair Posts[linked without box because of tumblr post limitations]
Other horny drabbles [separate list]
About This Blog [links to post about guidelines reqs etc]
[Need more MK1 smut? Check the pin 📌]
Permissions summary: YOU HAVE MY EXPRESSED PERMISSION TO USE ANY SCREENSHOTS, GIFS, ASSETS OR CONTENT THAT I HAVE MADE OF THE GAME MK1 [MORTAL KOMBAT 1 (2023)]. EVERYONE has my enthusiastic consent. You don't have to make something I *enjoy* with those assets. You're under no obligation to please me with your content, even if it's made with bits of my content. Enjoy yourselves, go wild! Any MK1 screenshots or gifs that I make can be used for your fanworks as long as you have the legal rights to do so. [I'm pretty sure you all have the legal right to make any fanart/icons/reposts/headers/photo edits/collages/parody that you like, but I do not know every single law for every country. You're on your own to research whether you'd get in trouble for SubScorp art in Indonesia or the PRC or Alabama or wherever you are where all the rules get weird. But as long as you're not getting punished for using my MK1 gameplay in your work, go nuts! You have my permission to use the assets I've made from the game.]
#sub zero imagine#syzoth#tomas vrbada#liu kang imagine#mortal kombat#mk1#mortal kombat 1#sub zero#bi han#kuai liang#liu kang fanfic#subzero#mortal kombat sub zero#lin kuei#bi han x you#sub zero mortal kombat#scorpion mortal kombat#kuai liang imagine#kuai liang scorpion#bi han sub zero#bi han x reader#mk1 bi han#mk sub zero#sub zero mk1#sub zero x you#sub zero x reader#tomas vrbada fanfic
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Call for Submissions: The Self-Love Tournament 🎉👨❤️💋👨👩❤️💋👩
Be it alternate universes or freak transporter accidents, a witch's curse or timeline shenanigans, one thing that's fascinated scifi and geek fan culture for ages, especially on this hellsite, has been the prospect of meeting yourself.
And also.
What if you then did the dirty.
To honor this glorious tradition, I'm assembling a tournament that pairs the sexiest of tumblrmen with themselves, and then pits them against each other. We'll determine, once and for all, the selfcest champion.
Automatically included are some of the greats (and my personal favorites). Feel free to include them in submissions so I can curate lists of aliases/start collecting propaganda
The Onceler (from The Lorax movie)
Loki (from Marvel/the Loki tv show)
Ice King (from Adventure Time/Fionna and Cake)
Kira Nerys (from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)
Dave Strider (from Homestuck)
The Doctor (from Doctor Who)
Sans (from Undertale)
England (from Hetalia)
Submissions
I'll try to prioritize characters with more submissions or more impassioned propaganda, so keep that in mind when submitting
+ Ground Rules:
I reserve the right to exclude any characters or fandoms from the bracket (to be fair, the most hated usually get voted off quickly anyway). For example, I decided to exclude a MCYT character, as their player is not comfortable with certain fandom behavior, and there's significant overlap between the character and creator. I'm not here to shame you, but I don't want to amplify something that sexually objectifies a real person beyond their stated boundaries.
Feel free to vote on whatever criteria you see fit! I try to prioritize iconic ✨ examples, ones that have had large impacts on Tumblr history, and any personal blorbos 💖
(NEW 9/20) I did say whatever criteria, but I do feel like I should address hate-voting. I'm not going to forbid it, but I ask that you consider if you really do hate the character/fandom that much. For example, Oncelercest isn't my cup of tea by any means, but man.... you gotta hand it to him.....
I love passionate (and even sometimes violent) propaganda, but do NOT bully anyone or send targeted threats. If it's getting nasty out there, I might use my judgement to adjust this rule, but I hope I won't have to.
Please feel free to spread this submission list! Tagging some of my inspirations: @ao3topshipsbracket @who-do-i-know-this-man @stop-spreading-this-poll @masked-character-competition @bestadaptationtournament @ultimate-anime-tournament @unlikely-adversaries-bracket @top-fictional-unhinged-women @mosthomoeroticenemies @bestfictionaldivorce @controversial-blorbo-bracket @tournament-winners-tournament @the-most-character-i-ever-saw :)
From my end, I really appreciated how @controversial-blorbo-bracket ran their tournament, so I'll try to follow their lead: be open and transparent, give people who are writing propaganda the benefit of the doubt where possible, and try to take passionate takes in stride.
(NEW 9/24) Constructive crit or feedback in good faith is appreciated! I want to make this a space for celebration of fandom
#selfcest tournament#tournament poll#character tournament#tournament#polls#selfcest#onceler#oncelercest#loki#marvel#fionna and cake#winter king#kira nerys#ds9#doctor who#tenth doctor#tentoo#undertale#sans#hetalia#long post
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