#the research ive done and the changes ive had to put it through to get to 10 and now 11 were Many

[inconsequentiallittleghoul]

DH is a beautiful woman that did her damn thing when it comes to playing claudia, but the hairstyle in this pic (and couple others in the show) has kinda rubbed me the wrong way ://. obviously no disrespect to DH since all my negative comments are directed at the people behind the scenes. bc this didn’t happen in s1 when BB and her looser curl pattern played claudia and that fact alone makes me feel justified in my anger.

bc why does one of the main characters of this show have a hairpiece that barely even blends into her natural hair?? the production team prides themselves on how much time and effort goes into the set designs, costume designs, prop designs, etc. (rightfully so, amazing work) but can’t even provide one of the main characters with a decent fucking hairpiece????

like it must’ve been awkward enough rushing through the recast and filming process but the fact that they couldn’t even get her a hairstylist skilled enough in textured hair to style hers to fit the claudia look they were going for is fucking ridiculous. and i get that they had BBs claudia in mind for s2 at first but when she left they should have made changes that better fit DH. and the fact that BB made comments about hair being important for claudia in s1, only for them to not give DH the same care and attention just feels antiblack to me.

this show is truly so lovely and it really sucks that big details about these black characters are being decided by a room filled with mostly white people. then rewatching the after episode thingies with everyone talking about how much detail they put into this and how much research went into that, only for claudias hair to be a detail they couldn’t concern themselves with now that she’s not played by a biracial woman with loose curls is :/ ughh.

i don’t think I’ll ever get over it and i will forever mourn the various hairstyles we could’ve seen paris claudia in had they cared enough to hire a black hairstylist. bc ive seen DHs insta and that woman stays looking gorgeous with her hair styled to perfection so im positive the styling crew of this show could’ve done so much more with claudias hair. and if they couldn’t then they should’ve hired somebody who could.

sighhhhhhhhh ok im done now. but if the same problem persists in s3, I’ll fucking scream

[draculas-tits]

"windows just works" you bought a whole new plug n play pc instead of upgrading from a legacy mb to one that supports uefi, converting your system disk from mbr to gpt via cmd, enabling tpm, then booting the install media didnt you

[corviiids]

my dear friend rook who i love and also i eat your writing. may i have 7 + 19 for the writing asks meme??

HELLO STYG I LOVE U!!!!!!!

7. your preferred writing fonts

this is weird bc aesthetically i prefer serifs and i had a phase where id always change the font to georgia before writing but these days i feel like the default on gdocs is fine (i think it's arial? some sans serif. calibri is also fine) because ive become someone who just scribbles things on her phone in the lift at work and that's like when i do the most writing. i did use the comic sans trick for a while which works surprisingly well

if im on the bus then wingdings. ive done this many times. it works fine it's just a faith system you have to trust that your future self will be able to decipher your typos. actually it's kind of good because you just get your shit down out of your brain onto the thing and you cant read it back which removes all self consciousness. it's like maybe ideal for a first draft?

19. the most interesting topic you’ve researched for a fic

i feel like ive gone down Some Rabbitholes for fic before but just recently (like 2 days ago) i had to ask kj to please explain organic chemistry to me and also what organic chemistry is. he had to painfully walk me through an entire chemical reaction just so i could make a stupid one-off joke. anyway now i understand why gummy bears explode when you put them in potassium chlorate

i meant fructose

[bloodyknucklesforme]

remember how I said I wanted to do an AU where Johnny survives MWIII but is in a coma and Nina has to take care of him? Here's a random snippet

Nina drummed her fingers against the desk, staring hard at the question on her computer screen. It was only a practice test but her anxiety shot up with each question. It seemed dumb really considering everything.

"You don't happen to know the answer do you?" she asked, turning to look at Johnny. It had been three months since the 'accident', which was the only way she could refer to it, and he'd been unconscious since then. She'd done her best to keep his hair the way he liked it but it had gotten a little long as of late. Even with the weight loss she wasn't strong enough to hold him up long enough to cut it. Same with bathing but that required even more movements. That's why Kyle was on his way over.

She got through three more questions before Kyle knocked on the door. She'd given him a key but he still knocked before coming into the flat.

"Hey, love. How are you doing?" He pulled her into a hug as soon as the door shut. "You eat today?"

He had a bag of takeaway in his hand, just in case. She'd lost weight too.

"I did actually. I made a chicken salad," she assured, taking the bag away and putting it in the kitchen. "Thank you, though. We can eat after Johnny's bath."

"You know how eager I am to get to that." Kyle chuckled.

Nina entered the bedroom first. It wasn't really a bedroom anymore. Their bed had been replaced with a hospital bed. IVs, heart rate monitors and other devices crowded around him instead of the usual pillows and plushes.

"Johnny, Kyle's here to see you." She'd been told it was good to keep talking to him, let him know who was in the room.

"Hey mate, still sleeping?" Kyle sat in the spare chair next to the bed, he squeezed Johnny's hand. "If you don't wake up soon, I might have to steal your girl. Don't mean any disrespect but she did convince me to come over to help bathe you so she might already have me wrapped around her finger."

Nina laughed and rolled her eyes as she logged out of the practice test.

"How's studying going?"

"Okay," she shrugged.

"I do have this weird rash if you could take a look?" He jokingly started pulling up the side of his shirt. "If you're going to be a nurse, I will take advantage."

Nina waved him off, giggling.

"It is impressive, what you're doing." A look of earnestness coming over his face. "Minus the whole coma, he's pretty lucky to have you."

"It's a vegetative state." She corrected. "He has involuntary muscle movements and his eyes move a bit during painful stimuli."

"You have been studying."

"It's a little funny that the method used to determine how severe his condition is is called the Glasgow Coma Scale."

"Doesn't surprise me that's where they'd do the most research to head trauma."

"If he can hear you, he'd be very offended."

"I'm about to wash his arse. He can piss off."

"I just need you to hold him up. I'll wash his arse."

"You really are an angel."

Kyle was a good helper, it was the solider in him. He took every order of hers without question. Didn't bring up how she would steal kisses against Johnny's skin as she finished each section. He talked to Johnny, cracking jokes and letting him know recent football scores.

She couldn't say that it had gotten easier caring for Johnny. She had help, a nurse came to change his IVs, catheter and feeding tube. She was only taking the nursing classes so she could do it on her own. Simon and Kyle had warned her about burnout, offering to watch him so she could sleep or even just leave the flat for a walk. His mum and sister came down twice a month or more.

It just ate at her, that something would happen if she dared to cross the threshold. He had improved, albeit slowly but that could change any time. The brain was just a fickle thing. If he took a turn for the worse, she wanted to be there.

She never told anyone but some nights she curl up between his legs and rest her head on his thigh, a hand rubbing across his stomach. She hoped he knew she was there. That she hadn't left him. She would wait for him. If he woke up tomorrow she'd be the first person he saw.

"You ready to cut his hair, now?" Kyle asked. They were both sweaty and a little tired. She looked at Johnny. His hair did look strange with the over grown mohawk and fuzzy sides. She did like how his hair curled a little. He did need a shave but she could do that on her own.

"I think it's okay for now," She ran her hand over his forehead. "Let's eat."

Kyle had picked up Greek. They ate with the bedroom with Johnny. They had a football match playing on the telly. It felt almost normal.

"You're doing a good job." Kyle kissed the top of her head, having pulled her into another hug by the door. "If you need anything. Call me. And I'm begging you to at least sleep on the couch instead of that cot. Can't do much if your back is fucked."

"I'll try. Thank you Kyle." She missed being held like this. "I love you."

"Love you too." He gave her another quick kiss on the crown of her head before heading off.

Back in the bedroom she turned on some of Johnny's favorite music and opened her lap top to continue her test.

[houseoffourcats]

What Do You Need to Know Right Now? Pick a Pile and Find Out!

14 July 2023

If you enjoy this reading, please consider getting a personalized reading through my Etsy page. Thanks for your support!

Pile One

VI of Swords - IV of Coins - The Magician

The VI of Swords tells me that you escaped something hard if not downright traumatic - an abusive relationship, a toxic family, or a bad job, for instance. The process of getting out of that situation was by itself a long, difficult and even dangerous path. As a result, as seen in the IV of Coins, you’re careful not to lose what you managed to keep through all this. You don’t trust other people easily, and keep your resources - internal as well as material - out of sight so others don’t try to destroy them or use them against you.

The Magician calls upon you to do something new to come into your own after surviving that. In contrast to how the figure in the IV of Coins hides part of herself as well as her resources, his posture is open, his arms where people can see them… though he remains somewhat mysterious, draped as he is in black robes. More than that, though, he’s powerful, channeling strong forces through what he has - though it may not seem like much - to make big changes.

You shouldn’t have had to go through whatever it was you escaped from, and your wariness is completely understandable. When you’re ready, though, you can use the qualities and skills that got you through the difficult times, and any material resources you’ve kept throughout, to reclaim your power. The best case scenario is being able to use your experience in a transformative way, making things easier for other people experiencing what you did or preventing it from happening to others in the first place.

Pile Two

Ace of Swords - Page of Coins - The High Priestess (Reversed)

You have a great new idea, as represented by the Ace of Swords. Maybe it’s a project like a book or an invention, or a new way of thinking about things that informs the rest of your life. The Page of Coins shows that you’ve already set to learning how to put the idea into practice and laying a solid foundation for what comes next.

The thing is, though, you’re still learning, and not everything is intuitive yet - far from it. To make matters worse, there’s some bad advice out there (hopefully not what you’re reading here!), a lot of it coming from people with ulterior motives. The High Priestess warns you to be aware of what you don’t know, including who has your best interests at heart.

Your idea is a good one, even if there’s a steep learning curve. Do your research and think things through. Is that degree program or “boot camp” training a good investment, or is it a scam? Is the person who wants to work with you on this reliable, or will they try to take advantage? Also ask advice from those you know you can trust, especially if you know anyone who’s actually done something like this before. If you make it past this early stage without things going horribly wrong, you’ll get to the point of being able to make decisions in this area of your life with no problem.

Pile Three

Queen of Wands - The Hermit (Reversed) - III of Coins (Reversed)

The Queen of Wands and the reversed Hermit are two very different people here. The Queen of Wands is very driven and confident, and can be more than a bit impatient when it comes to getting things done. The Hermit reversed is directionless and doubting, thoughtful to a fault. The III of Coins reversed suggests here that this doesn’t make for a good partnership, whichever side of this dynamic you’re on.

It makes sense, in a way, why you would be drawn to each other. If you’re the Queen of Wands, you want someone who’s not going to try to usurp you, as it were. If you’re the reversed Hermit, making all the big decisions would be overwhelming, so having someone to do that piece of things is a must. It’s just that you’re too much the opposite of each other to work out, romantically, professionally or otherwise.

When you call this partnership quits, though, see what you can learn from it. Can you communicate your frustration with a delay in a kinder way, if you’re the Queen of Wands? If, on the other hand, you’re the Hermit reversed, can you ask for help making a decision earlier so you don’t agonize over it endlessly before getting anything done? This will help you develop a healthy relationship with someone, where your needs and skills complement one another’s rather than clashing.

—

I hope you enjoyed today’s reading! If so, please head over to my Etsy page for a more personalized reading at an affordable price.

In the meantime, though, here are Arya and Sam enjoying the cool tiles of the kitchen together:

[kermodeiiii]

Forgive Your Heart

Chapter 1: The Encounter

Summary: Nevarro was never a place for surprises after you had come accustomed to it's unyielding atmosphere of danger, however a small green child just might change your view on this planet.

A/n: I've seen so many fics that often either poorly portray chubby bodies or just make the readers thin and dainty and so I'm taking matters into my own hands. :)

I have watched all of the Mandalorian but not many Star Wars movies so excuse me if I use improper lingo but I will do my best to research things I'm not sure of.

Masterlist

Nevarro was a shithole. That was known not only throughout the planet but throughout the outer rim, it was where they needed your help the most, that's why you’re here. Being a medic was never going to be easy no matter what planet you decided to work on, but Nevarro was another level of filth. The bounties, the bounty hunters, thieves, scammers etc. were all on Nevaro, you cursed your kind and giving heart, you wanted to give what you could see people thrive in this decrepit place. Constant blaster shot cases and near dead bounties were never uncommon at your Medcenter, it’s practically what kept the lights on in the place, and being the head medic of your station made the atmosphere much more daunting.

Snapping out of your daze and drawing your attention to a shouting patient, and making your way over to see what the fuss was about. He was yelling on and on about someone getting away that ‘I’m gonna kill that son of a bitch!’ and ‘He’ll never get off this planet alive!’ a male bounty hunter from the looks of it, various weapons and ammunition hanging off his struggling body to get off the gurney one of your Medics was pinning him down on. As you slightly jogged alongside the gurney making your way to the operating table, you put your hand on the man's shoulder pushing him against the gurney making his head jerk your way. You needed to stay calm.

“Sir, we need you to take some deep breaths and calm down so we can do our job.”

“To hell with your job! That bastard’s gonna die! Today!”

When you tried to speak again the man tried and failed to knock you and your medic to the ground, you yelled for assistance from passing medics asking them to get and IV started while you held his arm down as well as getting 20mg of morphine to try and calm the man down. You pinned down his arm with the help of the other medics, he writhed under your grasp as the IV was inserted into his arm, the morphine quickly made its way through his body helping calm his nerves and lessen his pain. As you entered the operating room you were greeted by the head medic of the trauma unit.

“I’ll take care of this, you’ve done plenty already by drugging my patient.”

“Hey, if i hadn-”

You were cut off by the operating door before you could finish your defense, your fists balled tightly at your sides as you walked down the hallway leading back to the medic station. You noticed something odd, it looked like a burlap sack you’d take with you to the market. You made your way closer and noticed the sack sprouted two long green ears, was this someone's kid? Once you had reached the child you knelt down with an outstretched hand and spoke in a soft voice.

“Are you lost hun? Do you need help finding your parents?”

Two massive black eyes stared back at you when the child turned around, you had never seen anyone like him, he only stared at you and looked down at the ends of his robe that draped on the ground. The hallway was getting busier as you stayed there in the middle of it, you gently scooped up the kid and made your way to the side of the hallway out of everyone's way. He gripped your lab coat and whined out, something clicked in you, vaguely you could hear a voice in your head. Hurt. You looked at the child and he stared back at you once again, you noticed he only held your jacket with one of his clawed hands, carefully you took his small hand in yours and examined it. A simple cut, something that could’ve been fixed at his home with a med patch, maybe he thought it was a bigger cut than it is?

“Let’s get this taken care of, yeah? You wanna choose a cool med patch?”

You began listing all the cool patterns of kids' med patches to him, rocket ships, rainbows, camouflage, glitter etc. Entering the supply closet with the little green child in your arms you dug out the med patches you had listed and held them out for him to choose from, you’d have to cut them down to his size of course, he was so tiny you couldn’t help but feel a bit protective over him even if it had been only two minutes since you met him. His big eye scanned over the patches his eyes landed on a patch that had droids in a pattern with a blue background. He pointed at the same patch and looked up at you with a little grin, another vague voice ran through your head, Him. You let a warm smile grace your features, handing the patch to him to hold and putting the rest away, you make your way into a vacant examination room and shut the door. Setting the child on the cot and turning around to pull the scissors out of your pocket to cut the patch to fit his tiny hand. Moving across the cot to sit on the rolling stool, you held out your hand silently asking for permission to see the cut, he placed his hand back into yours. You placed the patch onto his hand and let out a disappointed sigh.

“Hang on, I have to cut it a bit smaller buddy, your hands are so small I have to make sure it fits properly. ”

Taking the patch back you once again cut off slivers so it would fit his small hand, you took off the plastic backing of the patch and firmly placed the sticky side against his skin. You ran your hand around the border of it to ensure it was secure on his hand. He looked up at you and cooed, that voice made its way in your head, Kind. You gave his head a simple pat and rubbed his cheek as you stood.

“How about you stay here for a bit ok? I’ll see if I can find your parents.”

He gripped the bottom portion of your lab coat and looked up at you, he seemed agitated Dangerous. The voice was a bit louder this time you could feel anxiety in the voice, was he doing this? Does he know he can? You set your hand on his head once more, smiling down at him and pulling the blanket on the cot closer to him, making a small nest for him to comfortably lay in. He still held your wrist, not wanting you to leave, but you still can’t tell if he’s scared for you or for himself.

“It’ll be ok, I promise sugar. I’ll be back in a few minutes. How about that?”

Slowly he let your wrist go, as you made your way out of the room you mentioned again you'd be right back and closed the door. You quickly made your way back to your computer at the medic station, searching through files and profiles of all patients and employees. You had searched for nearly 10 minutes before rolling away from the desk and running your hands over your face with a defeated sigh. You raked your hands through your hair and scanned the people coming and going through the hallways, your eyes landed on an armor clad figure, the T shaped visor already pointed at you. A Mandalorian? He made his way over to you, parting the crowd with little effort. You stood and made your way around the desk to meet the beskar clad man, you had a feeling in your gut but couldn’t tell if it was to run or to trust him. His body language was clearly agitated, balled fists at his sides, looking through the crowd almost frantically. He tilted his head down to meet your gaze.

“Can I help you with something?”

“WheR- s K-d”

“Excuse me?”

He hit the side of his helmet harshly, seeming to fix some malfunction with his hardware. At the same time the Mandalorian grabbed your collar and held you close to him by your lab coat, his stature was intimidating but you never let that faze you. You held your ground and kept your stare even and brows furrowed, his fist tightened noticing your lack of fear.

“I said, where's the kid?”

[minheeskitten]

"2k is long" is also nonsense i'm so sorry 😭 2k is barely anything if you're trying to introduce an AU and actually flesh in a setting and especially if you're trying to show different personality traits 😭 your fic are mostly AUs with really well thought out lore, and it needs the word count to breathe and establish everything. if someone's attention span is too short to read more than - what - 2 pages? that's their problem, not yours! fwiw, my fic lengths range with the shortest starting at around 5k and the longest getting close to 30k and i have never had anyone leave a complaint about the length! people are more than willing to sit through 10k+ just to get to the smutty stuff, and they usually end up enjoying the rest of the fic as well. do not worry about it! you're doing just fine 🩷

I don't often look at the length of a fic unless im updating someone on how long its getting. My shortest wip is 100 words. And. Ive posted it to here bcs i feel it'll never be finished.

If it does get finished eventually then i will post it as a fic but. Until then it sits in my drafts.

My fics almost always include worldbuilding to at least 3k now. Though not all of them were like that.

Do you want in on a secret? I don't think out the world for my aus. It fleshes itself out. I think on what may happen n go from there. The story writes itself. I am just a vessel for the words and visions.

I am absolutely terrible at worldbuilding if im doing it consciously.

Its why i have visible headcanons for idols. But i just can't put them into words haha.

The most i think through is 'what sort of details would enhance this and make it better to read'

And then thats where i go from!

Siren!ivan was originally supposed to be more non-con than it is rn. The consent is not proper consent tho but thats bcs. Well. Siren wants what he wants and he will convince dann to give it to him.

Though. Thats a little bit of a spoiler. It is going to be tagged accordingly. Don't worry ill tag fics right.

The fic i thought through the most, probably is one ive not even started wtiting. The dissection fic. I gotta do all sorts of research so i can make sure its accurate and well done.

Which unfortunately means i gotta look at anatomy from a more medical standpoint. Need to go find a book for that..

The first fic i put out actually has a very strong plot hole. That i told myself id patch before posting it but. I didn't.

That plot hole was the reasoning as to why ivan was doing that to hwon. It has a very weak reason and i could absolutely fix it now. But. Not this year.

I write ab 5k minimum most of the time haha. I prefer letting the story fill itself out n then helping fine tune details. Its why i really can't tell you how long a fic may be.

So far my longest fic is 16k words. Published. Theres more unpublished. That's for the abandoned but not orphaned one.

I may return to it eventually. That's why i didn't wanna orphan it.

All of my fics stop at a point they organically would have stopped at. When i feel it can't really take another scene. I end it. That usually leaves spaces for part twos to them as well!

But i like exploring aus as i write them.

Fun fact! I write aus bcs im worried that if i do anything else i may accidentally copy someone else's idea.

I do get inspired by the other kd writers. Oh gods do i get inspired.

Lee, lunar, eve, even erin, who encourages the hwonicide. They all inspire me in their own ways. Does that usually come in the form of a prompt to note down asap? Yeah.

But other ways are helping with details for fics. And they are all very welcome to chat ab fics w me. I don't steal ideas. Not without permission and changing it to be my own.

I have a prompt that is inspired by eve's fic Clear My Mind (eve is karmacumover btw!)

But it is different. I may show her the prompt itself if she wants to see it haha.

But i love working on fics. Even if I can't be proud of them as a 'look i made this!' i can still look at the work and go 'yeah. Thats good.'

Thank you lee for helping me figure out how to do that. It was amazing to be able to step back and go 'thats a good story' if i removed myself from it.

The lee im referring to here is intenselysalmon. So she knows who im referring to.

One day. One day my goal is to be proud of how much I've written. Of what I've written.

Its a goal i think is far away. But the more i talk to other writers. The more i realize.

Im not as bad at writing as i think i am.

Honestly id never even considered myself a good writer, until i asked writers like lee and erin their feedback on my works. And they both said i write well. Maybe a little dialogue heavy but. Thats fine i can work on it.

Im doing my best. And im trying to ensure i continue getting better.

The more i talk to other writers and see how they talk ab my writing. The more i go. 'maybe im too harsh on myself' but. As they say, you are your own worst critic.

Honestly i never even considered my work good enough to do much with. But. Lunar still offered to possibly do a collab or fic trade. And i keep thinking on it. Maybe.

It makes me think they find me a better writer than i find myself to be.

Then i see eve, reacting to some of the xlips of airen!ivan ive put out. And she's reacting as i would for any of lee's clips. I find lee an amazing writer. It seems eve thinks of me that way too.

Im trying to wrap my head around it. But the reason i am so harsh on myself is. Anxiety and self doubt. And i need to work through them.

Thats the first time ive admitted that.

I will work through my weaknesses, and be better than before. Slowly. It takes time. I have to be patient.

One day. One day i will be able to proudly say 'im a good writer'

Its not today. But. It will be an eventuality.

Moots mentioned in this post:

Lee (@intenselysalmon )

Erin (@kurenaiwataru )

Eve (@karmacumover )

Lunar (@kingdoms-babygirl )

[timothylawrence]

4 and 7 for the writing game 🥰

omg... tumblr user filbort !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4. What's something you've researched but haven't incorporated into your fic?

ermmm ermmm.... ive done a lot of native swana culture research but never been brave enough to really incorporate that beyond a few throwaway lines in fic !!! im too shy LOL

7. What character do you enjoy writing most? Why?

omg i wrote so many... but if i had to boil it down to three it'd be Katagawa, Sasha, and Naoko. For Kat, he's got so much personality and he's just. so animated so writing him is a LOT of fun. he's very rewarding and different stages of his redemption so to speak are really fun to jump around.

For Naoko, she's equally as rewarding imo!! getting to see her change from what little we have in canon to whatever i put her through (sorry girlie ily) makes me feel really rewarded and happy LOL. it's also fun to write her interacting with people and in situations she hasnt previously been through!

and for my dearest darling Sasha... I think it has a lot to do with how complex she is.. she's a much deeper character than people give her credit for so it's always a joy to explore her character and how she ineracts with different people :3 <3

[ofminstrelandwine]

its been such a long road getting to exactly where i need to be in life. i dont compare myself often to others because i feel like im so far behind. i didnt start college immediately. i didnt finish the first time i started. theres no place for excuses, but my family life held me back so much. since going no contact, i have completely changed my life. im so successful in so many ways. school, work, mental health, organization, motivation. i make 80k+, working 30-36 hrs a week, while putting myself through school full time with no loans, i have a 4.0, i have kind friends who are also succeeding. im loved and supported, and i love and support others. im just doing so well. i wish i had done this the moment i turned 18, but i guess i needed my frontal lobe to develop first. im going to be applying for summer research internships this week. wish me luck. no matter what happens, ever, i will always be so proud of myself for what ive accomplished.

[writerquil]

you genuinely expect us to believe you read case studies and scientific studies when you refuse to read a tumblr ask?

you have no idea what youre talking about at all, and you refuse to listen to anyone who disagrees with you because you've made up your mind about us without even hearing what we have to say and provide to a conversation.

you're so stuck in the toxic sludge that is your little puritanism cult and it shows

first of all when did i ever claim to read scientific studies lol, most of the things i know are from extremely basic research.

and no i literally just dont care enough to argue online, i did hear what u had to say the first time then replied with my own saying, including the fact that im not interested in debating or arguing, to which u replied with an entire essay

nothing has changed, i dont feel like arguing or debating because im never going to agree with u guys, ive had these arguments more times then youd think and you all talk the exact same and bring up the exact same points that im just so bored of refuting and have to delete right after theyre finished plaguing my profile.

"I brought up different points" you didnt, because although i didnt read your entire essay, i did skim through it in hopes u would have some points that i havent heard before or that i havent refuted before and you didnt.

so i have already listened to be people who disagreed with me, when they moved on, another came along, i refuted all their points, they said i was in a toxic cult (sound familiar?) and moved on, then another came along.

i dont feel like explaining my points again and again, this isnt some special little thing where ur the chosen one about to prove me wrong and im going to be like "omg ur right."

and before you say "how will u ever agree if u dont try" ive seen ur point of view before and i TRIED to put some effort into understanding ur points but when all of your points can easily be knocked over, its difficult

"then knock all my proves over, prove it" NO, because ive already done that way too much, so unless u want a copy and pasted paragraph ive already sent to five other people

your little "im the calm and collected one who explains all of these points in this organized, long way" is used by every single one of you, and when i explain to u that i said im not interested in a debate u get angry, just like the rest.

so once again, so it sticks to ur brain, ive heard the same points too many times by you all, frankly i dont feel like refuting them over again, you want an argument, or "conversation"? go somewhere else.

and before u reply with "ha im not fucking reading all that, if u didnt read mine why should i read yours", you did, you read this entire thing.

[thorntopieces]

1. How many works do you have on A03?

currently 74 :)

2. What's your total A03 word count?

254 101 (two hundred and fifty-four thousand one hundred and one)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

i've bounced between a fair few in the past 8 or 9 years. i don't currently write much due to depression, but it would be LU/LoZ/Persona if i did

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Ad astra per aspera - fmab fic i wrote for my gf for our two year anniversary in 2019 [1060 kudos]

Silent love - also an fmab fic i don't recall the plot of [731]

His soulmate - also an fmab fic i don't recall the plot of :) (hello i have dissociative amnesia) [581]

Hold me - surprise surprise also an fmab fic i don't recall the plot of [559]

Sleepovers - i think the first fic i published on ao3, pjo/hoo [484]

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

usually yes, unless they're spam

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

uhm i know i have written at least one open ending implied msjor character death fic but idk which one?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

again, no clue. im not gonna go through 74 works to check which one is the happiest

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i think i have in the past yes! but i don't remember details

9. Do you write smut?

i have, but i don't publish it. that's a personal preference though and might change in the future

10. Do you write crossovers?

i did back in 2015! pjo x hp specifically (it's deleted no you can't find it it was purged in one of the fanfiction.net purges). apart from that i don't believe i have, although i have some persona 3 x persona 5 stuff in the works

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! i had ad astra per aspera translated into russian a few months ago and im very honoured :)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes! i wrote a few pjo collabs back in the day (i no longer write pjo/hoo, i have not read past hoo i am not interested in what happened beyond the final book of hoo /info). i have also written a few sherlock fics with the lovely and talented @aljedd

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

my longest comfort ship is drarry, but i don't interact with the ship and most definitely not the fandom much anymore due to other interests. it's kept me company for 14 years though so i won't let go of it. i will love it privately and personally in spite of jkr

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

ive got about 100 wips in notebooks and docs. about four years ago i started writing a fma fic that really dissected life in real-life munich in the 1930s and put almost 80 research hours into it. i gave up on chapter 4/5 because it wasn't read and i moved on to writing other stuff. it's still on ao3 though. it's called interdimensional and was 30k before i gave up on it damn :/

16. What are your writing strengths?

i think im okay at writing emotional scenes?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i. hate. describing. environmnents. and. fighting. scenes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i've done that before! i think it's fine as long as translations are provided accessibly to the reader

19. First fandom you wrote for?

ranma 1/2 or winx club when i was like 8, though the first i posted for was pjo/hoo back in 2014/2015 (on fanfiction.net) :)

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

uhm probably dark hair significance or ad astra per aspera.

@mydmdcorner enjoy the pain of tag game, @aljedd no pressure at all but since i already mentioned you i might as well do it again :)

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @the-real-azalea-scroggs! Had to wait until I was of my phone because doing these is a nightmare on mobile lmao

1. How many works do you have on A03?

18 as of a few days ago!

2. What's your total A03 word count?

60,763! Which is. Only a fraction of the word count in my Docs folder. Be prepared.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I mainly write for The Legend of Zelda; specifically Linked Universe! In fact, that's all that's posted on my Ao3 currently, since my fall into that fandom began with me uploading there! Pre-Ao3 I wrote for Black Cat (Anime/Manga), Megaman NT Warrior, various Pokémon things, Assassin's Creed, Yugioh, Final Fantasy XIV and Octopath Traveler! Some of these I still write privately, but I haven't gotten around to re-posting any.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Whistling on Deaf Ears - My longest fic on Ao3, focusing on Wild and Twilight's friendship and how good intentions can lead to disaster.

Iconoclasm - Warriors deals with the room full of portraits in Cia's palace. The Chain also deals with it, but with a bit more fire.

Deserving - Twilight finally tells Rusl that he was the wolf in the village during TP, but that also means dealing with some heavier topics. Colin half overhears them and forms his own conclusions.

Something Greater - The start of the "Hyrule can see magical auras" series! In this one we deal with Legend and his many rings.

Ocean Magic - Mermaid Legend and Zora Time have a race and then fight one of the Big Octos from WW! Fun times.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Every single one!! I love comments, they give me an excuse to ramble about my fic more!! I am always down to ramble about every single insignificant detail of any line and/or section. If you ever want more background info about one of my fics, look to the comments! So please, I adore comments, I treat them like treasures, not responding to them would be a CRIME.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

There's no contest; Inevitable, my (so far) only MCD fic.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmmm, that's hard to quantify. I usually try to end fics on a hopeful note regardless. I'd say possibly either Deserving, where Twilight reconnects with his family, or Shimmering Blue, Striking White, where Time meets the Fierce Deity settled down on Satori Mountain and they both get closure.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully, no! I've been blessed with mostly amazing and patient readers, even when my upload schedule isn't the best.

9. Do you write smut?

No, not really. I've attempted it, but I'm too asexual for it lol

10. Do you write crossovers?

Very, very rarely. Mostly privately, and only very specific ones. Only a single one has had an actual plot, so far (more on that one in question 15!).

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Also a nope! I tend to write for smaller fandoms, where these things don't tend to happen a lot!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have! But it's been a while. Over a decade, in fact! I tried to find the fic to link it here, but it was on the German fanfic website fanfiktion.de, and my friend who posted it back then must have deactivated her account, because it's nowhere to be seen (I still have the Word file though!). It was a Multi-Crossover that started as an RP in a forum, and we took turns turning the RP into prose one chapter each. "If a Hero Turns to Dark" was its title. We were edgy teenagers.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Hissssss. Bad question. Shoo. They are all equally important!! But it's probably TenRose from Doctor Who.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

One of the very few crossovers I've ever worked on; a crossover fic between Assassin's Creed and Doctor Who, that I have mapped out in both chronological and timeline order, and yes, those are different. I only ever wrote about a quarter of it, since my primary audience of it disappeared when we graduated. I doubt I'll ever pick it back up properly, and if I do it'll probably go through heavy rewrites first since it's so old. Finishing it is a nice thought, but realistically, after 9 years it'll never be high priority enough for it to actually happen.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, especially arguments, and emotional impact. I've been told I do really well making characters feel alive and believable! Also I like to believe I'm decent at setting a scene and giving it the vibe I want it to have!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I struggle with dialogue tags when nothing much is happening besides the talking. I always feel it's too bland, and fall back on the same phrases. My scene transitions could use some work too.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done this with Japanese phrases, because I was a massive weeb. Usually I followed them up with their own translations, though; I'm not the biggest fan of footnote translations, unless they are properly linked to. Simple dialogue tags are my favourite way of indicating a language switch.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Black Cat the Manga/Anime! It's a series about an assassin turned bounty hunter trying to live a life separate from his murdery past, but getting dragged back into things by still wanting to avenge his best friend's death. The series has a special place in my heart and my bookshelf, it left an imprint on 13-year-old me that will never leave.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Probably Jailbreak, uncharacteristically enough! It's one of the only fics I never got stuck in once. Writing it was a great feeling from start to finish. I love writing all of my fics, but that was a special few days.

Tagging @ahrva @nowhere-to-go-but-down @silvercaptain24 and @aeghina! And anyone who wants to do it, really, go wild

[maddestmewmew]

imagine, for a second, youre learning to ride a bike.

youve never ridden a bike before, and in fact, you havent even been around a bike in years, as you were purposely kept away from bikes. you had a tricycle in 4th grade, but thats about it.you tried your best to research bikes, but youve never actually been on one.

yet now, for whatever reason, you suddenly need to ride an adult sizes bike.

obviously, you dont know the first THING about bikes! so when you get on the bike, you cant keep your balance and fall and scrape your knee.

you love this bike, and all its features. its INCREDIBLY important to you that you ride the bike. so you get back on.

youre trying your hardest to stay on the bike. putting everything into keeping track of peddling, steering, changing gears, paying attention to whats around you, balancing, all things youve either never done or hadent done in years.

so you keep falling and scraping your knee.

you realize, at this point, youre doing SOMETHING wrong. so you ask your friends, who all have ridden bikes since pre-k, how youre messing up on the bike.

"youre not messing up at all!" they say. "youre the best person at riding a bike ive ever met!" they say. "id be sure to tell you if you messed up!"

so you tell them, "ok. im going to get better at riding the bike. im going to figure out whats wrong, and then ill keep up with you when we bike around town."

"oh but youre not doing anything wrong!" they say. "youre keeping up juuuust fine!" they smile. "in fact, keep biking EXACTLY like that! we love when you bike like that!! and we love how wound-free your knee is!"

you know, well OBVIOUSLY, i AM getting something wrong, because my knee is always bleeding. so you try, all on your own, to manually go through each part of bike riding, attempting to narrow it down to the problem.

but you still keep falling.

and now matter how much you beg and plead, no one will tell you what youre doing wrong, and now theyre getting annoyed.

so you just. keep. trying. to ride your bike.

one day, all your friends leave. they leave a note explaining why.

"You cant keep up with us when we bike around the town." it says. "also, your knee is always bleeding."

[thithesandofferings]

“Open Wide”- Ogami Shirou x Reader

TW: 18+ MINORS DNI!! Dom!Shirou/Sub!FemReader, Comeplay, Choking, Voice Kink, Rough Sex, Praise Kink, Degradation, lil bit Size Kink SMUT!!

This is bad .

“Look at you Alan, I thought you said Purebloods didnt get Nirvalys Syndrome? Let me put in into you, before you lose your mind”

Who says stuff like that to the enemy? Ive never seen Shiro this angry before. Especially to say words like that. He barely speaks at all most days. Only when he absolutely has to. This should surprise me or- or stress me out but-

It's so hot.

Link to my Ao3 for this fic= https://archiveofourown.org/works/25414948

This is bad .

“Look at you Alan, I thought you said Purebloods didnt get Nirvalys Syndrome? Let me put it into you, before you lose your mind”

Who says stuff like that to the enemy? Ive never seen Shirou this angry before. Especially to say words such as that. He barely speaks at all most days. Only when he has to. This should surprise me or- or stress me out but-

It's so hot.

“Hey you! Look alive we gotta go!” Michiru yelled, startling me out of a downward spiral.

She was right. I had to get out of there before the place was destroyed to shreds. I could barely think. All I could think about was Shirou splitting that evil bastard's mouth open and putting his power inside it.

I couldnt help but feel jealous.

His wolf had such a presence on its own, how could I not be affected.

I needed to get it together, there were still people that needed to be saved. I shook my head and ran after Michiru towards Shirou. She was chattering excitedly, but I honestly couldnt understand anything she was saying. My eyes were on him.

He must’ve caught something in my gaze because he turned his attention to me.

“You okay?” His voice was gruff from exertion and I had to take a calming breath from the shiver that coursed down my spine. He caught that too.

“I should be asking you that Shirou” I looked away, but with a sideways glance I grumbled that he was, in fact, amazing. He raised his nose a notch, almost an afterthought,  and I could see him take a deep breath.

With his penetrating gaze solely on mine, I could feel my pulse jump and my temperature rack up a thousand degrees, I had to look away. He scoffed, almost smugly, and slid attention back to Michiru, who was still talking and running around. Something about having Shirou howl to the town.

We watched as he changed into his silver wolf form again to howl into the microphone. It was a beautiful site to see. Seeing all the animals completely stop what they were doing just to howl with him. Alan had no idea what he had been talking about.

Shirou had the Howl.

Michiro and I could only watch in awe. We were born human turned animals so we didnt have the innate instinct to go along with him. It was such an eye-opening experience, so much so that I felt a little empty at not being able to do it. Shirou looked so regal, the urge to fall on my knees in front of him was an encompassing feeling.

Shaking violently at the thought, I had to blow out a long soul-suffering sigh. Michiru glanced with eyebrows in an “are you okay” motion and I could only just nod.

What is going on with me? Where are my thoughts?

I had hoped that thoughts of Shirou would leave. The attention was of us and finally life was, in all intensive purposes, back to normal. Michiru was able to hang out with her fellow friends, and I- was able to start my work in the office.

Except, I could get nothing done.

Shirou was constantly in my peripheral, working on whatever case was in that week. But when he wasnt there, he was in my mind whispering in his growling voice about the things he could do to me.

I was dying.

There would be times where I would stare at a research book, never turning the page, just staring. It was becoming so hectic that Shirou asked if I needed time off.

“I know its been hard for everyone” Shirou had said. He had been in that leather jacket again. Who wears gloves inside? Why was it so hot?

Its not fair.

“What's not fair?” I looked up from his gloved hands and I could feel my heart rate sky rocket in panic.

I said that out loud.

His gaze is so piercing, it felt like he was staring into my soul. He was leaning on my door frame, completely relaxed. His usual bored expression was placed with something that was almost- teasing? Not that couldnt be right.

But it had been the same expression and mood for weeks now. His casual bumps and grins were so much that Ive had to actively avoid him before I had a heart attack. I wasnt in control of my emotions half the time, so any sort of embarrassment would make me change into my animal form. Even through his cold demeanor, it still seemed like he was laughing at me. I'm sure he could tell that I was flustered, especially when he turned into his wolf form. It always made my blood pressure go up and something slick slide down my thighs.

Which is what was happening now.

Oh no.

I prayed that he wouldnt notice anything amiss, but the world wasnt on my side. He lifted his nose up again and sniffed. It was as if he was trying to find someone miles away, but when he finally looked towards me, his pupils were wide open. Alert.

“You never answered my question.”

There was a hitch in my breath at that tone. That growl that Ive been dreaming about for weeks.

I’m so fucked.

“I-i uhm… sorry what?” I could feel myself blinking rapidly. I couldn’t get my thoughts in order. This was getting ridiculous.

“You humans are very odd,” Shirou rose up from the door, and for a moment I felt relief only to freeze when he closed my door.

With him still inside. We’re alone.

“You even more so.”

He walked slowly towards my desk. Well more like prowled. There was intent in his walk.

I’ve never felt more like prey than right now.

“I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at me” He’s whispering now. His gloved fingers gently spread out to the edge of my desk and he leans over it.

He’s so close.

“I smell you all day. Its intoxicating.” One hand lifts up and brushes my cheek, I know he can feel the heat.

“You’re the first human that I have ever wanted”

I froze.

Hes been feeling the same? From his expression and the dropping of at least two octaves, it was definitely confirmed.

“I- uh I want you too” My voice was hoarse from emotion. He could hear it just fine it seemed because if his pupils werent blown out before, they sure were now.

Shirou visibly licked his lips and I couldn’t help but follow the motion. He watched me watch him and he grinned, showing his fangs in satisfaction.

“Good because I plan to devour you. Stand up”

I could barely hear the order due to his growling. His ravenous expression was drowning me. I was swimming in heat and desire.

“I wont ask again”

Shirous’ voice snapped me back into reality and with shaky sweaty palms I pushed my chair away and stood. He never told me to move so I just stayed there. He seemed very pleased that I didn’t move.

Not like I could, I was barely able to breathe.

He stalked slowly around my desk until he was behind me, moving the chair completely across the room. It crashed into a plant and I jumped, still not moving an inch.

I could feel his breath across my nape and goosebumps coursed down my skin. I could feel him smelling my hair, breathing in the sweat that I felt that I was pouring out. I tried to move away, embarrassed, but I could feel his grip tighten and him growl at my into my neck.

“Stay still” He whispered. “You can be a good girl and do that for me right?”

I froze at the pet name. I’ve never heard him call me anything other than my last name. I couldn’t believe how it affected at me. I could feel myself become even more drenched.

He could tell.

“Oh? You like that huh?”

I felt his leathered hands slide slowly underneath my shirt and palm my breast. I gasped, my head falling on his shoulder at the groping. This was getting intense fast. I heard something tearing and tried to glance down only to have one of his hands press lightly at my neck. Holding me still.

Shirou shushed me, keeping his hand curled around my throat. Murmuring something about not needing this or that, I felt fabric fall at my feet and my chest became covered in hot leather. I let out a choked moan, only to have his grip tightened.

“You’re gonna have to be a quiet pup, you don't want all your colleagues to know what you're doing right?” He was so mocking, I couldnt help but feel flustered with how demeaning he sounded.

I nodded knowing I couldnt say anything in this position.

“Thats right, good girl, now go on bend over the desk” He slipped his hands away and disorientation readily slid back into my head.

I laid over my desk, paper be damned, and wrapped my hands over the edge to hold on. I heard him growl in confirmation at the act and I preened at the act of pleasing him.

I’ve never felt this way. I was completely ok with him taking the reigns. I didnt have many braincells left, I could barely think. All I could do was just do.

Shirou hands caressed my ass in appreciation, his ungloved hand (when had that happened?) made a purposeful track up to my waistband, hastily taking them off. I was completely soaked and hearing him swear obscenities definitely didnt help.

“I can’t wait to knot you, pup” I felt his weight against me, his bare chest completely covering my whole body. He was so warm, degrees hotter than his normal, his breath hot on my cheek as he licked my face from chin to forehead.

“The real question is,” he says through licks down my spine. “Which form do I want to take you hm?” I shivered violently at the thought of Shirou taking me in my wolf form. Outside of Anima city it is forbidden to have any of those kind of thoughts. But you couldnt help that you constantly thought about Shirou fucking you in his wolf form.

I could hear his deep chuckle at my spine. He knew my answer.

I felt him nose my wetness and my breath hitches. It didnt last for more than 5 seconds and I could hear myself grown out against the desk.

“I would love to taste you, but unfortunately we dont have that kind of time.” There was a zipping noise and I tensed, gushing even more at the thought of what it could be.

“I would need hours to be satisfied from your taste” He is suddenly in my ear. “But I plan to fuck you like you need it.”

I could hear myself mewling at the thought. I’ve been wanting this for weeks. I cant believe someone like Shirou even wants to touch me. Shirou, cool-mannered and distant, wants to fuck me five ways to Sunday is honeslty an eye opening experience.

There is a clicking sound and I gasped. I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didnt feel the fingers. I could feel myself clenching around and my mewling became even louder. Colleagues be damned.

There was an surprised hum from behind me.

“You’ve been touching yourself?” All I could do was nod embarrassed. He cooed sweetly and added 3 fingers inside of me.

“What were you thinking about? Were you thinking of me? Tell me” I gasped in affirmations. I couldnt take it anymore. I needed inside of me now.

I felt like I was going to die.

“P-please Shiro, I need it.”

“You need what pup?” He grinned savagely and I felt something hard and hot against me.

I wiggled in frustration. Only to have him laugh and hold my hips still. Using his strength to make me stay still.

I was going to have bruises.

“Please fuck me Shirou” I whispered into my shoulder. I knew he could hear me. I felt my chest tighten at the gasp and growl.

“Good girl.” I shivered and gasped as he pushed the head in with a savage force of his hips.

“I wont hold back pup” He laid his furry chest against my back “You might be ruined for any one else.”

“I dont want you to Shirou, give me your all”

A growl was heard and then the most intense feeling of my life was radiating through my whole body.

He thrusted so hard that I could hear the desk screeching. The other colleagues, if they were still there, would definitely hear it. I prayed that they weren’t gonna check to see if I was okay. I wouldnt be able to speak anyways. I’m pretty much holding on dear life on the desk. There was no way I was able to explain anything.

Shirou didn’t seem to care either. The constant growling and heavy breathing that was coming from him was telling.

“Youre so tight, I cant believe all of me fit inside of you” He groaned and all I could do was tighten around him, which made him go even faster. There was a crack from the desk, but I ignored it. All I could concentrate on was the heat and his cock bruising my insides.

“Mine mine mine MINE” He stopped abruptly and pulled out. Only to pick me up effortlessly and turn me around, my back hitting the desk.

He entered me again and with that the world was crashing around me. I’d never come so fast in my life. Watching him in his wolf form growl over me as he pounded me into the afterlife, I wasnt gonna last long.

Seemed like he wasnt either, his thrust got more savage and I got louder. He took his right hand and placed it at my throat again to cut off the noise.

“Be quiet while I shove my knot inside you, I need to concentrate” It made me fall again, shivering while he grinded his knot inside me. He came with a roar, tightening his hands on my throat, cutting off my sound.

“Shhhh, good girl, you did so good” He whispered praises to me while he continued to grind himself inside me. He lifted his hand and I gasped dazed.

He looked up at me and caught my disheveled appearance and grinned.

“Dont move, I’m not done.”

I returned the grin.

“Good Shirou, cause neither am I”

[sergiusreports]

Prompt #2: Bolt

There were 392 bolts that went into Sergius-IV. 392. And somewhere, one was loose. A lanky man was currently contorted around the bot that hung suspended just a few ilms off the metal grating of the laboratory floor trying to find a proverbial needle in a haystack. A man. Barely. A kid, really. All of nineteen turns with his own lab, his own grant, his own Capitol project to deliver on. That’s what being a wunderkind gets you. The attention of the military complex.  

What weak sunlight had been able to penetrate the perpetual Garlean cloud cover and filter in through the slender vertical windows of the research and development complex had set, and the flicker of cold, artificial light from the ceruleum fixtures bathed his long, angular face in a cyan glow. Ceruleum powered lights were a cheap and effective alternative given the dearth of natural light. As with everything, if the Garleans didn’t have it, they made their own. 

There was a hint of dark circles under his eyes as he leaned back from the warmachina prototype, wrench hanging limply in his grease splotched hand. A testimony to the sleepless nights he’d been pulling lately. Despite that, he was well-groomed. Clean shaven. His golden hair brushed neatly into place. Eyes so pale they were almost colorless blinked at the artificial lights. When had they kicked on? He was clueless as to how late it was. Time was a fucking construct.   

“Try again.” Lucian said in exasperation to the seemingly empty room.

“Error. Connection failure in the locomotion systems. Recalibrate.” The terminal reported. The flat, monotone voice coming from a bank of screens against one wall of the lab never changed, as though unfeeling to Lucian’s plight or the pressure of the deadline he was under. 

“I hate you.” He muttered and leaned back over the unit in front of him. 

“Irrelevant.” The terminal replied. “We both know that’s false.”

“Just tell me where the hell the point of failure is.” He ground out, quite possibly at the end of his rope. This was the part he hated the most. Putting the hardware together, thinking you had done everything, dotting your i’s and crossing your t’s. Checking and rechecking everything only to power it up and get…this. 

He never got it on the first try. Not once. Forget the third time, apparently the fourth time wasn’t even the charm. 

“Undetermined.”

And it wasn’t like Sergius was any help in the matter.

“But you know there is one.”

“Correct.”

“You’re an ass. I should format you.” He sighed. 

The A.I. didn’t bother to respond. This was consistent with their typical banter.

There had to be a better way of doing this. Lucian worked on the problem in silence as he made his way down the unit’s alloy frame bolt by bolt. 

The lab itself was a study in obsessive compulsive order. Bits of machinery, wiring and circuitry covered several large lab tables but nothing about the work space seemed haphazard or out of place. Tools all had their place along one wall, spare parts were kept in bins or meticulously labeled shelving units. Even the floor was scrupulously clean. Lucian may have been one of those Garlean wunderkinds snatched up by the Capitol and lured to the Research and Development sector on the lucrative promise of substantial grants and freedom to chase his own projects but to him a cluttered workspace equaled a cluttered mind. He’d seen some of the other architectus’ spaces on this floor and he knew not everyone saw it his way. The one at the end of the hall in particular should be condemned. A rat’s nest if he ever saw one. The only good thing that could be said was that it matched the unkempt, dark-haired gremlin it belonged to. 

“Again.” He said, this time smearing a bit of grease across his forehead in an attempt to push a blond curl out of his face.

“Error. Connection failure in the locomotion systems. Recalibrate.” Came the maddening reply. “Have you considered allocating funds for an engineer or two? This doesn’t appear to be your area.” 

“Ohhh, insults now?” Lucian chuckled with a dry, dark humor born out of irritation as he went back to work. “Remind me to recalibrate your personality settings when I’m done here. You could do with 40% less snark.” 

“No. It’s a little late for that. I am what I am.” 

“Don’t get philosophical on me.” A tight pause and then, “Again.” 

Over Lucian’s shoulder lines of data began scrolling up the terminal screens. “All functions optimal. Sergius-IV is online.”

Lucian punched the air with celebratory glee.

“Damn straight they are. Because that’s how good I am.”

One more of these units and then a presentation showcasing Sergius’ abilities to the Capital research grant committee and they would surely extend the funding. They couldn’t find fault with the concept now.

Just then, the door to the lab opened and a rotund, bespectacled man poked his head in. “Lucian. Food. Now. The cafeteria has nuggets.”

“Threat detected.” 

“Shit. No. Four, no.” Lucian chastised as if the combat unit was nothing more than a misbehaving puppy and not a complicated piece of experimental technology. Tossing the wrench on a nearby table, he hurried across the room to the terminal, his fingers scrambling across the keyboard in a flurry of keystrokes as the construct powered up. 

The intruder seemed surprisingly unperturbed. “Forget to pair this one into its matrix?”

“I didn’t forget.” Lucian grumbled. “It just came online, it’s still patching. How long, Sergius?” 

“Two bells, fourty-two minutes until download complete.” the terminal replied. 

His visitor eyed the combat unit with a considering tilt of his head. “You sure it needs an organic shell? It looks terrifying as is. If I wasn’t already familiar with the project I’d be losing it right now.”

“You and the Garlean soldiers it’s supposed to help.” Lucian grinned with a note of pride. “The grant committee wants a shell.” 

“That’s a lot of extra work for you.”

“Eh, I have the nanotech department working on it.” He yawned and stretched as a series of disconcerting pops sounded along his back. “It’s come a long way from the algorithm I made to play chess with me when I was twelve.” 

“That’s the saddest shit I’ve ever heard. You couldn’t get anyone to play chess with you? Did you have exactly zero friends?” His colleague laughed.

“Shut up. And you did?” Lucian shoved him out the door, pausing to call out over his shoulder to the A.I. “Okay, break time. I’ll be back in a bit.” 

Sergius didn’t reply and silently went about the business of patching another unit into its neural network. In time they’d figure out how to move the entire network from one core to another in one go which would put an end to this confusing, dissociative fragmentation. But for right now, this was nothing more than the experimental dream of a youth whose validity still needed proving.

[alrightberries]

dante’s inferno

request: wassup homie could you maybe write a college au fic where levi and reader are rommies, then one day reader brings home an adopted cat without levi's prior knowledge? You could decide what happens next lol. Tysm 🥺

❈ pairing: levi ackerman x reader

❈ genre: fluff, semi-crack ❈ word count: 4k

❈ summary: college au. in which you bring a stray cat to your dorm and your neat freak roommate won’t let you keep it.

alternatively: a compilation of college shenanigans where you and levi are best friends who are bad with feelings (ft. an unamused cat named dante)

❈ trigger warnings: profanity. mentions of alcohol and smoking. implied smut.

a/n: this was supposed to be loosely based on the nine circles of hell according to inferno by dante alighieri— hence the title— but i did my research wrong so now it’s loosely based on the seven terraces of purgatory according to divine comedy. i’m keeping the title tho.

Inspired by this art by @ryuichirou on tumblr.

Permission to repost art was granted by the artist. Do not repost/edit the art without explicit permission from the artist.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

i. first terrace: pride

“We’re not keeping it.”

“But why?”

“We’re not keeping it.”

“But why.”

Levi’s tongue clicks in annoyance. His eyes glance next you where the offending creature lay on your bed; tail curling, paws kneading at his your favorite fleece blanket. Quite frankly he’s a little offended when the little shit has the audacity to glare at him back.

He’ll never admit it, but his ego’s a bit bruised because the cat’s glare was slightly better than his.

“I said no,” he firmly replies, looking back to you. “It’s bad enough I have to share a room with an anarchist who has no respect for boundaries—“

“One time, I forgot to use a coaster that one time!”

“—and now you expect me to share a room with a dirty fur ball who does nothing but eat, shit, and sleep?”

“He’s a cat, Levi.” You murmur, scooping the cat into your arms. “And he has a name,” you give a nervous smile when you see your rommate grit his teeth. He feels a headache coming.

“You named it?”

“Dante is not an ‘it’.”

Levi makes a move to step closer but immediately stops when the ‘Dante’ hisses at him.

“Aw, he likes you.” You coo.

“Clearly,” he replies unenthusiastically. “Listen,” he sighs. “I respect your cat’s pronouns but that doesn’t mean he’s allowed to stay. Or do I need to remind you of the mac and cheese incident?”

Okay, maybe he was on to something. If you got caught with a pet in the dorms you’d breach your third and final warning, and you’d be forced to dorm off-campus. The fact that you were still here after the mac and cheese incident was solely because Levi pulled some strings (aka asked Erwin, golden boy of the campus who owed him a favor, to pull some strings).

But you couldn’t just let Dante go. There was something about him that felt so familiar; something about his black fur, thin silver eyes, unamused snarl, and overall grumpy demeanor. Especially endearing was the way he’d grumble and pretend to be annoyed whenever you tried to cuddle him but would complain if you stopped.

You just couldn’t figure out who or what he reminded you of.

Maybe you would’ve figured it out too if you weren’t so distracted with watching Levi and Dante stare at each other. Your eyes dart back and forth between the grouchy cat sitting on your bed and your grouchy roommate sitting on his desk. Both were slightly crouched over with their heads tilted up in a show of dominance; they were engaged in what seemed to be a glaring contest, gunmetal irises unamused and mouths taut in a snarl as they protected their territory.

You sigh. You really, for the life of you, couldn’t figure out why Dante felt so familiar.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

ii. second terrace: envy

Levi is not jealous. He’s not.

At least that’s what he tells himself as he sulks alone on his bed. His arms are crossed and his lips are in a pout, eyebrows knitted in distaste, occasionally glancing to your side of the room where you sat up on your bed. He’s sure whatever movie you chose to watch together is interesting and all, but right now all he could pay attention to was that stupid cat. Sitting on your stupid lap. Getting its fur stroked by your stupid hand. Getting all the love and affection his stupid self should be receiving.

It was him you should be cuddling, not Dante. Saturday nights were reserved for him and you, not you and a cat while he happened to be in the room. He’s been trying to make a move on you since high school and he can’t fucking believe he’s losing your attention to a cat. Sure, he’s always been too chicken to make a move and had to suffer seeing you get together with assholes— as per your type during your emo high school days— but this was a new low. He can’t wrap his head around the concept that he’s losing his longterm crush to a motherfucking cat.

When you coo at how adorable the fleabag was for what felt like the 50th time that night, Levi decides he’s had enough of the cuddle-hogging piece of shit.

Wordlessly, he crosses to your side of the room and lifts the cat from its perch, ignoring your protests as he sets it down on the floor and tells it to ‘scram, you little fuck.’ He uses a hand to dust your lap free of any microscopic cat particles Dante probably left behind before lying down his head down once he was satisfied. He grabs your hand to put it on his hair.

“Stroke.” He orders, eyes closing.

“What? No! You pushed off Dante.”

“He was in my spot.”

“You couldn’t have given up your lap pillow for one night?”

“One night?” He scoffs and turns to look at you. “You’ve been abandoning me for two weeks. That disgusting, tic-infested, rabies-carrying slob has no business sitting on your lap.”

“He’s not disgusting, you gave him a shower before you agreed to let me keep him. And I took him the vet to make sure he had all his shots. He’s clean, Levi.”

“Tch, good. Now throw him out and let him find someone else to freeload from.”

“Okay, what’s going on?” You guffaw. “You’ve been grumpier than usual. And why’re you being such an ass to Dante? He’s just a cat.”

“Don’t think he’s special in some way. I’m an ass to everyone.”

“Then why does it feel like you’re always extra mean to him?”

He doesn’t reply. His lips are downturned into a frown when he looks away with a click of his tongue, and you realize with a sigh you won’t be getting an answer from your cryptic roommate soon. Your fingers start mindlessly stroking his undercut when you get lost in your thoughts— a habit you developed through years of Levi using your lap as a pillow. He always complained the first few times you did it but you knew it calmed both him and you, and that it put both your minds at ease. Moreso Levi right now, apparently.

You’re keenly aware of how he seems to curl up into you the more you keep going. You watch as his shoulders slump down when you stroke the side of his face, and his eyebrows relax slightly. From your angle, you could even see the way his eyes close in content. Maybe even a tiny smile if you were being delusional.

Your lip twitches upward.

“Oh my god, Levi, are you jealous of a cat?”

“Shut up and play with my hair.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

iii. third terrace: wrath

“You owe me a new cravat.”

You blink up at your roommate. “What?”

“You owe me a new cravat.” He repeats. He pulls from his pocket a white piece of fabric— barely recognizable— torn into shreds, releases it mid-air. It gently lands on your open palm.

“Wait, did Dante do this?” You ask, eyeing the slik in your hands.

“Unless you went feral in the middle of the fucking night and decided to cut up my clothes, yes.”

“Oh my god, Levi, I’m so sorry. I swear Dante will never—“

“You actually owe me three cravats,” he interjects. “The first two I overlooked since they weren’t that expensive but I draw the line here.” His lips are downturned into a frown, eyes poorly concealing his clear distaste. “This one’s my favorite and it was made from silk.”

You eye the fabric in your hands once more before nodding in understanding, setting down the once beautiful cravat before taking out your wallet. It was only fair that you paid him back; he was being more than generous with letting your cat stay and keeping it a secret, and now you wonder how many bad things Dante’s done that Levi’s overlooked or simply never brought up with you.

“Sure, I’m really sorry. How much do I owe you?”

Levi doesn’t say anything. Instead he pulls out his phone and types something on what you could only assume was google, most likely looking for the same brand of the cravat your cat had just torn into shreds. You weren’t entirely sure how much those could cost, but surely you could afford—

“What the fuck!” You screech, eyeing the page with very, very hefty price tags listed. Holy fucking hell where did he even get the money to buy something so expensive. Gulping, you nervously look up at your unimpressed roommate. You already knew he was taking it easy on you; his aura was the only thing intimidating, at least he wasn’t giving you the murder eyes. And even though he was a man of his word, you were thankful he hasn’t reported Dante.

Still, it didn’t change the fact that Levi looked pissed beyond belief.

“Uhm... can I pay you with a check that’ll definitely bounce?”

“You will pay me in cash.”

“Fuck, fine!”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

iv. fourth terrace: sloth

Levi silently works on his desk. His laptop’s open in fromt of him, numerous notes from classes and books from the library surrounding him. The gentle sounds of clicking and clacking echoe throughout the room as fingers typed at the keyboard, eyes concentrated and lips pulled taught as he focuses on his task. He’s on a roll. He’s almost done with this part of his research, nothing could snap him out of this, he just needs to—

“Levi, when do you think Dante will come back to me?”

He stops typing and grits his teeth.

This is how it’s been the entire night. Ten minutes of peace before you ask him some stupid questions that could’ve been answered with common sense.

“Fuck if I care.”

“Do you think it was something I did?”

He resumes typing. “Yes.”

“Do you think he’ll come back?”

“No.”

“Even after all we’ve been through?”

“Still no.”

“I miss him,” you sigh. “I miss him so much.”

“Then you shouldn’t have left the door open.”

It’s been a week since Dante escaped the dorm and Levi doesn’t understand why you’re still so depressed about it. I mean, you only lost a cat that you loved and treasured and treated like family. Surely a week of moping around in your pajamas and eating nothing but chips and soda was catharsis enough.

He hears you shift in your burrito blanket, presumably to turn away from him so you can sulk into the wall next to your bed. Good. Now he can get back to working on—

“Levi do you think Dante-“

“Enough.” He grits, slamming his laptop shut.

“Where’re you going?” You ask, eyeing the way he hurriedly stuffs papers and books into his bag along with his laptop.

“Out.” He replies, grabbing his keys and his coat. “I can’t stand this shit anymore.”

Your head is burried in your blankets when he slams the door shut and all you could do was slump down because great. You lost Dante, and now you’ve royally pissed off Levi.

Great. Just fucking great.

Unlike your cat, however, your roommate comes back hours later, just before curfew. He doesn’t bother with a hello— he never does— and neither do you, opting to stay hidden underneath the sheets. Though suddenly, there’s a dip in the mattress followed by a pur next to your head.

Could it be?

“Dante?” You murmur, lifting your head from underneath your cocoon of fabric. Small black paws and silver eyes meet your gaze. “Dante!” Immediately sitting up, you pulled him to your lap, scratching his little head and cooing about how much you missed him as he purred and curled into to you.

Levi would never say it, but he missed seeing you smile at the little fleabag.

You turn to look at your roommate. “How’d you find him?”

“Asked around the campus. He wandered into another dorm building and probably thought it was ours.”

“Well yeah but... I thought you hated him?”

“I do.” He replies instantly.

“Then why’d you find him?”

“I hate him, not you.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

v. fifth terrace: avarice

“I fucking hate both of you,” Levi grumbles, staring at the dorm.

Towers of boxes lined his supposed to be clean dorm room. He had a hard time prying the door open since it was blocked, and he wasn’t even sure how the boxes weren’t blocking out the light from how high they were piled. Dante’s sat on a stack of box directly next to the door, purring and flicking his tail around. Levi squints his eyes and glares at the little shit.

“You especially.”

“Mrow?”

Levi’s day had been, with no irony or sarcasm at all, amazing. He got a good grade on his research paper; the guy in front of him at the cafe accidentally ordered an extra serving of (coincidentally, Levi’s favorite) tea and gave it to him for free; and he got full marks for the presentation he’s been worrying about for weeks. His class even got dismissed early so he had an extra hour for lunch. He knew you didn’t have classes, so in honor of his great day he thought he’d do something nice and take you out for lunch. His treat, of course.

But any trace of his good mood vanished when he went back to the dorms and got greeted to a room that looked like it came from an episode of Hoarders.

This is what he gets for trying to be nice.

“Levi! Is that you?” You called out.

“What the fuck happened?”

You laugh sheepishly— at least Levi thinks you do. He couldn’t see you beyond the hundred boxes that took up your shared room. He hears some rustling and the sound of things being moved around before finally your head pops out from behind a wall of brown, smiling at him apologetically before walking towards him (and tripping a few times).

“Remember when I said I’d order some toys for Dante as a surprise?”

Levi’s eye twitches. “Don’t tell me—”

“I accidentally ordered 10,000 instead of 10. Online shopping struggles, am I right?” You nervously chuckle at his pissed off face. Levi was not in the mood.

Your smile widens as you make twinkly gestures with your hands. “So uh... surprise?”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

vi. sixth terrace: gluttony

The clinic is still when you first entered.

The harsh smell of alcohol and sterile metal makes your nose grimace, and the coldness of the thermostat brings goosebumps to your arms. Behind the wall, somewhete in the waiting room, cats are hissing, dogs are barking, and you could even hear the sound of birds angrily chirping and rattling their cages.

Dante cowers in fear on the silver table, and your heart aches. His ears are down and his fur’s standing on its ends, but you couldn’t comfort him. Not right now, at least. The veterinarian still needed to do a few more checks.

You gulp, “how’s... how’s Dante looking, doc?”

“Not good,” she murmurs. Her eyebrows are furrowed, and she takes a deep sigh as she eyes the information on the chart. “It’ll take months before he can walk properly again, possibly more if we don’t do anything about it soon.”

“Don’t tell me... is he—-”

“I’m sorry, my dear,” she sighs. “But your cat is heavily obese.”

The corners of your lips twitch down into a frown, and your palm is warm when you start to stroke Dante’s fur. He calms down a bit from your touch, less on edge but still guarded as he warily eyes the doctor’s gloved hands.

“But I don’t understand,” you reply. “I’ve been following the recommended diet you put him on, and I haven’t been feeding him anything other than the cat food and vitamins you recommended. How’s he still obese?”

“Well, we could look into other solutions, but for now I think we ought to look at whether or not Dante has an underlying health problem.”

Levi tunes out the chatter between you and the vet, bored eyes staring into nothing. He’s leaning against a wall and he’s watching the cat carrier. Your bag’s slung over his shoulders and your coat’s in his arms, and he was sure you didn’t even need him to be here for “moral support.”

He mentally scoffs. You probably just needed a chauffeur to drive you for free, and honestly, Levi would rather feel like a chauffeur than a coat rack.

His eyes make contact with Dante’s, and all the fear in the cat’s eyes is suddenly gone, replaced with a steely glare and bared teeth. A warning, one no one else notices but him.

Levi gives him a solitary nod, understanding what Dante wanted to say.

Don’t tell Y/N I’ve been sneaking to the neighbors.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

vii. seventh terrace: desire

There’s something about the buzz of alcohol and nicotine that makes Levi confident—- the liquid courage in his veins and the smoke in his lungs clouding his judgement. Perhaps that’s where he finally gets the balls to cross the room, drunken eyes on your equally intoxicated ones, before he pulls you in for a kiss.

The kiss starts slow, with lips just interlocking and lightly testing the waters. But then he feels your tongue make its way inside his mouth and your fingers weave into his hair to tug him closer, and Levi loses the last threads of inhibition he has. His tongue massages yours and one of his arm wraps around your waist, the other comes down to grope and knead your ass. He feels you walk backwards and your hand pulls at his tie, dragging him with you. Suddenly he’s trapping you against a wall, lifting one of your legs up to wrap around his hips so he could grind his crotch into yours.

Levi doesn’t expect his first kiss with you to be like this; messy and full of tongue and spit, full of fingers clawing at clothes and small grunts escaping your lips. He was hoping it’d be more romantic, with warm cheeks and fingers softly intertwining, shy kisses exchanged through little smiles.

But he’s not about to complain—- he’s wanted to be with you for years, and god he loved having you like this. Loved having you all hot and desperate, trapped between his firm chest and the wall. His cock is hard in his pants, and he just about growls when he feels you start to undo his belt, the fly of his pants coming down as you got on your knees and stared up at him with innocent eyes as you pull out his aching boner. There’s a cheeky grin your face when you pump at his length, and your tongue peaks out of your mouth before—

“Levi, are you okay?”

His eyes snap open, and he’s greeted to the sight of your worried face directly above his.

“Fuck!” he yells, and his forehead slams into yours when he flinches away. “Sorry, sorry” he quickly ammends when you yelp in pain.

He’s covered in sweat, he notices. Chest heaving, heart beating a little too loud for his liking, and he silently pulls the blankets over his cum stained boxers when you sit beside him.

God, he was really hoping you wouldn’t notice the fact that he came in his pants like a high schooler. And it was before dream you even got to suck him off. How much more pathetic could he be.

“Are you okay?” He asks, and you nod.

“Yeah, m’fine, it’s just...” your eyes are distracted, staring off into space. Fingers trace his thighs, and you sigh. “You were having a nightmare,”

Levi blinks. “What?”

“You were having a nightmare,” you repeat. “Kept tossing and turning and groaning in your sleep. And you kept making these... funny faces,”

“...right,” he nods. Sure, a nightmare. A nightmare he never wanted to wake up from.

It takes about ten minutes to reassure you that yes, he was fine, don’t mind the way his cheeks are flushed, he was just... shaken up from his nightmare, is all. Then you’re back to bed, sleeping the night away, and twenty minutes later he’s on his way back to bed too; this time with a fresh pair of boxers and a content look on his face, all thanks to him finishing off his fantasies in the communal bathroom during his shower.

The door makes a quiet click when he shuts it behind him, and he freezes when he catches sight of Dante sat up on your bed, tail flicking behind him as he gives Levi a knowing look.

Levi squints his eyes, and he threateningly whispers, “you tell no one.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

epilogue

The half empty room brings a frown to your face, and all you could do was pout as you sealed up the last of the boxes.

“Why do you have to leave again?” you ask, and Levi turns around as he finishes folding the last of his clothes. He shrugs. “Cats aren’t allowed in the dorms.”

You owed him your entire college career, that much was sure. The RA’s found out about Dante, and Levi had taken the fall to spare you. He wasn’t required to move out since it was only his first strike, but he insisted on doing so so that Dante wouldn’t be alone, saying he already found an apartment nearby and he’ll never hear the end of it from you if he didn’t take Dante with him.

Bullshit. Levi had a soft spot for Dante, you knew that much. He wasn’t doing it for you, he was doing it for himself. Though normally you’d be overjoyed to know that Levi really did secretly like the cat he pretended to hate so much, this time, you were just pissed. You couldn’t believe a fucking cat was stealing away the guy you’ve been in love with since high school. Sure, you were too much of a coward to ask him out, but he was basically your boyfriend already—- the entire campus knew you inadvertently had dibs on each other.

“Yeah but... do you have to leave me alone?”

“I asked you to come with me, and you said no.” He points out. “I still don’t see why when we’ve been roommates since we were freshmen.”

“It’s different off-campus!”

“How?”

“Because it’s like... it’s like we’re moving in together, y’know?” you reply. “And it seemed wrong to move in with you when we’re not even dating.”

“Let’s do it, then.”

“What do you mean?”

He sighs, handing you a spare key to what you could only assume was his new apartment. You glance between him and the key in your hands, and he rolls his eyes when he realizes that you still don’t get it.

“I know we’re doing this backwards since couples don’t typically move in before the first date,” he says before gesturing to Dante. “But we already have a son, and I know you’re his favorite parent. We can share custody until you can move in with me.”

You blink. “What?” Your brain stopped working when Levi referred to you as a couple, and you’re pretty sure your heart stopped beating too. At this point, anything he said went in one ear and out the other. He flicks your forehead.

“Hey— ow! What was that for?”

“You weren’t listening.”

“And you’re being a prick!” you grumble. “It hurts, y’know.”

He scoffs. “What do you want me to do? Kiss it better?” he scoffs.

Your mouth moves faster than your brain, “I’d rather you kiss me.”

Wait. What?

Before you could go back on your words, Levi shrugs. Warm palms gently grab your cheeks, pulling your face closer to his. Your eyes widen and you momentarily freeze, brain definitely not working anymore. He hesitates when you don’t make a move, but then you’re shyly leaning forward, and that was all the confirmation Levi needs.

“If you insist,” he whispers, and suddenly your words die on your tongue when his lips interlock with yours.

alrightberries © 2020. do not modify or repost.

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[silverhallow]

Hi! I'm glad you're open to constructive criticism; not a lot of other authors are. Anyway, I read Desire because I was interested to see Katophie and what the previous anon was talking about.

Re. when you said "Though I do have to point out I don’t think I inferred race or skin colour for either girl but I could be wrong.":

I don't think your sexual content is the problem. But sometimes the description used to describe a WOC or any POC in literature can have different/odd inflections because as a white person you don’t entirely understand the implications of what you’re writing. That’s the privilege afforded to you. But to other POC readers it comes across more obvious because we’re used to that in literature and real life. First, most of the fandom sees Kate Sharma as a WOC, specifically a woman of Indian descent, so we do view fic through the lens of race, consciouslt or unconscious. I think where a POC reader might have felt differently than you is when you essentially compared Sophie (a white woman) and Kate's (an Indian woman) attractiveness and outrightly had Sophie think that Kate was behaving the way she was because she didn't get as much male attention as Sophie did.

This is not a matter of sexual equality (power exchange exists; so do degradation kinks) but moreso how you treat them outside the sexual situations. It's not equality I think the anon wants, but a certain level of respect afforded to the white character that the POC characters weren't given (ex: Sophie casually demeaning Kate for not being as attractive to men has very racial overtones, as does the choice to make genevieve delacroix a "bitch").

Like, I don't think dubcon is the issue either (although if you're using terms like "dominant" and "submissive" I'd hope there would be no dubcon because this is all pre-negotiated, as would the degradation (ex: calling someone a slut during sexual activity)). It's a matter of basic respect and kindness being given to women of color in fics,

Hey Triv.

Thank you for this. Really.

I feel as a writer you have to be open to constructive criticism in order to improve and adapt.

Ive changed my writing in the past when I’ve had some things pointed out to me that could perhaps be taken the wrong way and I’ve learned.

I also see Kate as an Indian woman and it was never my intention for it to come across in a way that was meant to be offensive or degrading.

I can see how it could come across like this when it’s been explained to me in this way. It was never ever meant to offend and I am as soon as I get access to a computer taking the story down and I might look to re write it and take inconsideration the points that have been made.

I am a white woman and I am trying and its been done unconsciously as I put SO much research into my work usually to make sure I get things right! I spent three weeks researching for Kate’s wedding in All’s Fair and other things as I want to get to get it right!

But thank you for explaining this better to me and I will do better and the fic will come down because I can’t bear the thought of being being offended by it.

If it gets reposted is a different matter but thank you for messaging and educating me 🧡