@pyrotechnicarus was right, that tv can fucking glow.
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POTENTIAL SPOILERS FOR “I SAW THE TV GLOW”
‼️‼️‼️‼️THIS IS YOUR WARNING TO TURN BACK NOW IF YOU DONT WANT TO BE SPOILED‼️‼️‼️‼️
i’ve been thinking about “i saw the tv glow” ever since i saw it yesterday and all of the layers that were in it. especially since my brain’s been kinda blah since last night
yes, the whole movie is essentially an allegory to being trans and not being able to be yourself. and i LOVE that messaging, don’t get me wrong. i think it’s so important to have that narrative be told. that messaging is literally part of the reason why my friend and i got so emotional when we watched it lmao. i literally started thinking about the scene where owen/isabel tackles maddie/tara on the football field and runs away right before they go through with their plan at the dinner table yesterday and almost cried. how owen/isabel was so close but got too scared and ran away. that happens so much with trans people, myself included, and it just… ugh, it hit home so hard
but so much of it also reminds me of how it feels to deal with maladaptive daydreaming. how owen/isabel wants so badly to run away into the world of “the pink opaque” and be someone else, be someone he wants to be rather than what real life dictates he SHOULD be. when maddie/tara talks about time and reality feeling different and wrong when she’s in this world but feeling better or “normal” when she’s in the world of “the pink opaque”. the image of owen/isabel literally sticking his/her head into the tv screen, so close to that fantasy world, before being pulled away and forced back to this reality sticks with me to this very moment
you want to live in, and stay in, the worlds in your head so badly with MADD. i know i have an issue trying to be present and be a part of reality when the worlds in my head make me feel so much better. i have so much of an issue trying to be there for the people around me and focus on what’s happening but the second i start getting overwhelmed or just have time alone for myself, im right back into the worlds in my head and i would much rather stay there because it feels safer. i feel some semblance of control, of being someone worthwhile. the exact same way maddie/tara would rather be in, and stay in, “the pink opaque” world
that in itself is a coping mechanism for stress! a coping mechanism the stress owen/isabel finds himself/herself in when trying to be who he/she is in a world that doesn’t want him/her to be! the stress from the fear of wanting to come out and be yourself but being forced to conform to what the rest of the world wants! it’s all intertwined! and i love it! this movie just gets better the more i think about it!!
and i love that even though it doesn’t have a happy ending, there’s still a twinge of hope. because there is still time for owen/isabel, just like the chalk on the street says. there are plenty of people who transition later in life. though owen/isabel is struggling badly at the end of the movie, he/she still has time to be who he/she wants to be. who he/she is. it’s not too late. it might be bad at the moment for him/her, but it’s not too late
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Bad things happen bingo
Original work: Ex: A Villain's Lament
Kick them while they’re down
Ex: Villains lament with either Tara or Maddi
(Aaaaaa thank you!!! I went ahead and used Maddison for this because his whole story ended up taking a major turn in my head and changed after that last prompt.)
Tw: death, mention of messed up hand
There's nothing left to hold you together. Your will is only strong enough to last a few more minutes. You can barely move your hands... hand? against the ruins the lie beneath you.
At least they're safe…
The only thought that's left to give you some comfort. They're safe. Maddi and Silvia, they'll get away from whoever's attacking you they'll-
Small hands against your chest, pain surging through your veins. Like molten lava burning everything away. You think you hear yourself scream, you think you hear crying and words too beyond your current comprehension.
You think you see him, dark skin covered in dirt and blood, dark eyes filled with unshed tears. Ángel… Maddi… Your husband…
Your… husband?
You feel a surge of strength with the next wave of pain, everything becoming just a bit clearer for only a moment.
"Silvia we need to go," his voice, so broken, so tired.
"No! I can make Da better I can-"
The sounds of screams, the sounds of begging and crying. You want to tell them to run, to escape while they still have time.
A flash of light, a blast of energy.
You don't remember falling asleep, only waking up. Finding his body next to yours, your hand reaches out, bone meeting flesh. Gone. He's gone. You can see it in the way his eyes feel too empty, to unseeing. Can feel it in the way your powers want to latch onto his body.
You choke on a sob that rises in your throat as you turn your head away, expecting to find your daughter's lifeless body by your side as well.
There's no sign of her, no trace left behind to ever say she was here. But you know she was. You can feel it in the freshly knitted flesh that had been melted away only moments before.
You found her eventually, it took almost a year. A year of suffering. She's alive and she's breathing, but so broken. Refusing to speak. Refusing to acknowledge the world around her.
You remember the rage you felt in that moment. An unstoppable force that's driven you to this point.
Your steps are certain as you walk toward him. Fusion Snap. Hero... Murderer. You've finally got him in your sights. The man who killed your husband, who helped kidnap your daughter, who tried to kill you. He's going to pay for every ounce of pain you've all suffered.
He stands his ground, fists burning but faltering to attack you and your minions. A mistake on his part but you guess sentimentality was a mistake you were guilty of once as well.
Your hand barely twitches as you order the dead around you to move. Old comrades, people who you had trusted only to be stabbed soundly in the back by them. They all had to pay and now there's only one left on your list. Finally, you can finish this.
It doesn't take long for them to overwhelm him. Too weak to fight back or maybe just too broken by the empty eyes of dead friends attacking him. Your smile feels almost crazed as they bring him to his knees.
He looks up, staring you down as he grits his teeth together, "I thought you were better than this Koa. Look at you, murdering your friends? Using some stupid name as an alias?"
You can't help the bark of laughter that escapes, "Thought I was better? No. Hahaha no, you thought I was weak. That I could never have the guts to hurt people, to kill people like all of you could. I guess that did make it easier though. Every single one of you didn't expect it to be me coming back from the dead to haunt you."
You watch him swallow reflectively, you can almost taste the fear in his words, "It wasn't personal Koa. You and Madina should have known better, digging into things beyond the both of you."
"Do you really think I care about your reasons," you snarl at him, your skeletal hand flexing around the gun in your holster. It's the only evidence left of your 'death' by his hands.
"You're supposed to be a hero," he spits out, glaring at you as if his anger could ever match yours. You can't stop the sneer as you finally pull the gun free.
"No." You take a step closer, "Ángel Madina was a hero," another step, "Koa Madina was a hero," You stop in front of him, "and Maddison Carter?" You hold the gun even with his face. "He was never made to be one."
He stares down the barrel of your gun, teeth gritting together. No more words, no more excuses. You pull the trigger and watch him instinctively flinch away.
"Bang," your voice is cold, lips twitching into a dangerous smile. You kneel down, tipping his face back towards you with the gun, "Did you really think it'd be over that quickly?" There was more than one reason they called you Unending now and you're so excited to show him exactly why.
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Needless to say, when I made Ella back in June, I wasn’t expecting her to get very many partners or last as long as she has! I’m still convinced most of y’all are lost, but as a thank you for being here, I’ve thrown together a bias list of my favorite people under the cut. Thank you guys so so much for sticking around, loving my little sunshine child, and helping us grow and develop together! <3 <3 Without many of you, neither of Ella nor I would be here today! Also keep your eyes open for another surprise coming up soon.
Section 1: The lights of my life
Aka My absolute favorites who I am keeping forever
@personnages - Lynna, you’re basically the reason I got into rping in the first place! The last 5 or 6 years have been pretty rough for us both, but we’ve stuck through them together and I hope we continue to for a long, long time in the future! I love you so much and you’re without a doubt one of my best friends!
@annastrxng & @ladyangelaliberty - Lyssa and Angie, oh my gosh I don’t even know where to start! The three of us have also had a pretty rough last few years. But we’ll always have each other and our trip to Hershey to look back on! I miss our all night video chats and talking almost every day. But I love the two of you very much and I’m always gonna be here prodding you to look after yourselves, like a big sister should.
@ithilwcn - Ayla!! Time sure has flown by, hasn’t it? I know I can be a pain in the ass at times, but you’re always there to listen and keep me company and I love you to death for it?? I love each and every one of your characters and writing with you! Don’t ever change.
@tulog - Ran, gosh, we’re getting to be such fossils, aren’t we? In all seriousness, though, idk where I’d be today if you and Wu hadn’t given me a chance with Wen/Ellie waaaay back in the NRP days. I still adore everyone who was in the group, even if we don’t talk much anymore, or at all. You guys truly are my family and I’ll love you all the rest of my life.
@nogoodnessimproveme - Ari is literally my favorite Adam ever?? No lie I was intimidated when we first met just because you were so fantastic and I’m an awkward little potato. But you’re for real one of the sweetest people ever, and I would go to war for you ok? I’m so proud of you, and give Stella a big hug for me!
@i-want-adventure / @kit-itskit - Meghan was another one who intimidated me with her awesomeness. We don’t talk much anymore, but I know you’re busy and you have to look after school and yourself first, especially with how bad the last year has been. I hope things get better soon! Your Belle and Kit will always be near and dear to me for helping me find so much with my own Belle and Ella. You’re great and you can fight me!
@charmingisms - Tara is another phenomenal Kit! She’s so true to his charm and sweetness and just the way that he adores Ella. Every time I get a reply from her, I’m grinning like a fool. I wish we talked more ooc, but I adore seeing you!
@ncvcrlctgo - Milla is, I swearm my favorite Ella that I’ve seen so far. I can’t even hold half a candle to her, and the fact that she actually wants to write with me is mind boggling? I love talking with her ooc and plotting things, and just laughing in general. If I ever make it to Brazil we totally have to meet up!
@thewonderingsorceress - Ella is such a great oc! Her character is so complex but true and effortless, and my Ella adores her. And she’s the sweetest person ooc as well. I love chatting ooc and venting about problems.
@innocentmanwithabounty - Rose is such a darling, and Vin is the cutest thing ever? I’ve never really been big on the old west genre, but Vin is literally to sweet to resist? He’s such a gentleman and all of my girls that he’s met so far adore him. I can’t wait to see what comes for him and Ella!
@safeinmyheartjxr - Allie! From the moment you first messages me about making Miles, I knew we’d be close. I’m super protective of you, and anyone that messes with you has to go through me first! I know things are rough rn with school, but I’m always here if you ever just need to talk. We don’t even have to be writing, ok? I’m always here.
@villagebeauty - I miss Sam! Her Belle was so sweet and fantastic! And she was such a doll to talk to ooc. I hope everything is going well for you, darling!
@roastytoastyprincxss - Amy is such a great Nuka, like?? My inner child just squeals every time I see her on my dash because I feel like I’m watching the movie again. Not to mention, he and Ella are the cutest thing ever! Our poor babies! They’re gonna say screw everyone that hurt them and make it on their own!
@avaloranxchancellor - Raven is such a doll! I don’t know like anything about Elena, Avalor, or Esteban, but I adore him anyway? He’s so polite and gentlemanly. And how protective he is of Ella is the sweetest thing. God knows my poor girl needs it! I can’t wait to see what else we can come up for for them!
@smallmeanssafe - PAPA!!! XD The best Maurice right here, ok? Ella, Belle, and I all adore writing and talking with you, darling!! Plus, I love hearing your ideas for fics and how to make our poor little family suffer.
@mcrmaidscales - Foxxy is such a great Ariel! I haven’t gotten that far into OUAT yet, sadly. But I can definietly hear the cartoon Ariel coming through in her writing. If the show is anything like this, I’ll love her! Plus like I love her and Ella’s friendship? They’re so supportive and caring, and like sisters should be. Give me Ella being friends with more princesses! I want it!
Section 2: I just wanna love you
Mainly those, partners and not, I don’t know very well, don’t speak to that often, or just love in general.
@asktheprinceofdarkness - Maddy was so understanding of the fact that I know absolutely nothing about KH, and I’m glad that she was willing to overlook that because Xeha with Ella is so cute. I get the feeling he doesn’t trust easy but the fact that he does her is just the cutest thing!
@mostpeculiarmademoiselleetmsieur - Caity is another fantastic Belle that I’ve looked up to for a very long time! It was amazing getting to write with her on my Belle, and I just want to thank her for giving me a chance and tell her to never change and keep writing no matter what because she’s amazing!
@the-one-true-queen / @forgottenroyal - Jessi and Alice are fantasic? She’s one of my favorite Ocs that I’ve come across in my like 6 years on Tumblr rping. She’s so well developed and natural, and I’m jealous honestly??
@ellasmxther - Oh gosh where do I even start? When I made Ella, I honestly wasn’t expecting to find either of her parents, or if I did, I figured they’d all be inactive. And when Tara followed me, I had a mini heart attack. I love giving Ella and Elias a chance to spend time with their mom, and hope we get to do more stuff in the future!
@findthebxrd - Ok, talk about screaming! When I first found out there was a Dug blog, I’m pretty sure I cried because Dug is the best, and everything about this is just too precious, too pure, and too perfect. I love having Ella interact with him as a puppy and a dog, and I can’t wait to see how it goes with him as a human!
@imthelcstprincess - I’ve seen and followed quite a few Rapunzels across my blogs, and Lissa is a great one. She gets the innocence and carefree part of her nature with ease. Plus like I love her fcs! AnnaSophia is perfect for younger Punz, and I honestly wouldn’t have pegged Taylor as being older Punz, but I dig it in a way??
@whatshouldbedone - Kira is another amazing Ella that I can’t believe followed me, and another of my favorites! We don’t write together, although I’d love to! I hope everything is going well for you, dear, and your hiatus is the break you need!
@askjoeharper - Jenny and I haven’t written together other than Joe and Ilse, but she’s very sweet and he is a precious little dear! I honestly couldn’t get through Tom Sawyer, but I adore Joe and I would love to write with both of them again.
@riisingfromashes - Annie is such a sweetheart! I love that her muses are all so different and they all seem amazing! Belle loved Antoinette. I’d love to write with her again as well!
@princebete - Honestly another fantastic Adam that I’ve admired for years! I’m so glad to see that they’re still around and haven’t given him up! Seeing them on my dash is just such a great thing, and I always smile!
@fatherofnarnia - I miss Lina and would love to get to write with her again as well! Her Aslan is fantastic and I’m honestly blown away by how she’s able to do it.
@sweepthecinders - Aurélie is precious and Ella totally wants to take her under her wing. She’s such a well developed OC and a precious little one! Plus like, writing little kids is hard? But they do it fantastically well!
@wcnderment - I’ve only interacted with them briefly for Aurora, but I loved it! Her fc was perfect! And she was so sweet how she looked after Ella. I’d definitely love to write with them more!
Section 3: Those I admire from afar
Mutuals I’d love to interact with and adore seeing on my dash
@flxbber @demoliticnist @scoobydudee @notgettingawaythistime @riffrcffed @prince-kivuli @skidrowflorist @thedonewithsleepingbeauty @gliitchiing @do-i-win-yet @minamxrray @wcstenra @heavensliight @adolescentmxrmaid @sncwkissedqveen @notalone-butfree @ncturebcy @thiingmabobs
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New Post has been published on All Great Product Reviews
New Post has been published on http://allgreatproductreviews.com/why-is-my-cat-afraid-of-everyone-but-me/
Why Is My Cat Afraid Of Everyone But Me?
I have a cat that I found in my dad’s 1973 Cadillac El Clasico engine, five years ago. He was 3 weeks old and he was found with two baby possums. To this day, he will only come to me. He puts up plus my better half as he bequeaths him delicacies. Every person besides he hisses at in addition to operates somewhere else. He is fearful of the whole lot. Numerous kittens are questioning, although not this pussycat in addition to I wonder why he is admire that . He follows me love a puppy; I invite him my shadow .
Thomas: At any rate, Heidi, Mama’s more matured to pact along furthermore a petrified
cat or two excess of the course of her continuation.
Bella: If you’ve been beyond our blog , you comprehend Tara was cute afraid for a really protracted
point in time. She’ reaching
braver at the moment, although it carried not quite a year sooner than she’d come out from not up to the couch and sit on Mama’s lap .
Tara: I was frightened of the whole thing, plus I wouldn’t also chase
Mother
almost about. Although Mommy skillful another kitten …
Thomas: Her state
was Maddy Gold, and Mama’s mum adopted her loves a companion of the family unit. Maddy was afraid of every person except Mama, as well as she hardly disappeared Mama’s bordering
.
Bella: Mum didn’t grasp how to support Maddy engagement
less terrified of other people in general. Subsequent to all, she was merely a child back afterward. But she’s known a lot given that
then, hence we imagine we may well assist you in addition to your afraid tom cat
.
Tara: First of the whole lot, suppose almost where he lives . Completes he equivalent to costly spots or low locales? If he doesn’t submit to any exorbitant locales, suppose concerning reaching
him some feline shelves or a tom cat
tree consequently he may perhaps
see your family fancy
a distance .
Thomas: Subsequently attempt fiddling and him to move him out into the original of the apartment. Play can do miracles
to boost
a cat’s poise.
Bella: Peradventure
your spouse may possibly commence playing with him , more than usually
. That techniques he may learn that amusing topics
can take place in addition to kinsfolk varied than you .
Tara: If he’s a actually afraid pussycat, you could taste
to manipulate also still toys as well as not find excessively “in his face” with
them.
Thomas: You may possibly further try out
using Feliway diffusers . They contain an simulated “happy cat” pheromone that may well psychotherapy your kitty trust plenty
better off inside his place.
Bella: To capture your kitty usual
with other personalities
, try out
inducing one another
give him good things, exaggeratedly. Only once once more, what on earth you’re doing is aiding your cat notice that esoteric persons are delightful
, excessively.
Tara: Plus continue to be patient as well as the little gentleman. It’s moving
to acquire him a sec
to capture cast off to varying
persons. Peradventure
a extensive sec
. Equivalent to Bella cited, it carried me a every year to come out indulge in less than the couch along with start searching my latest conjugal.
Thomas: At the moment, regarding why he follows you as regards to hence closely: He’s clearly become exceptionally bonded to you because you raised him from such a small segment
.
Bella: That’s in reality attractive sweet!
Tara: He’s relying on you to succor him imagine sheltered, in addition to he enjoys you comparable to you’re his mamma.
Thomas: Reminiscent of we noted, don’t troth afraid to reason the closeness of your relationship to protection your kitty believe more sure. We’re certain you can take your trivial afraid feline furthermore flip him into a intrepid pussycat, cleanly like Mama’s prepared along furthermore Tara.
Bella: Best of providence to you in addition to your kitty , Heidi.
Tara: Whatsoever near to you esoteric readers ? Do you pass through any plan around how Heidi may well be of assistance to
her feline be less terrified of esoteric citizenry? Suit allocation your opinions
the comments !
Cherished More Revered as well as More established Kitties: Greetings savours Peru! I pass through a charming along with playful…
Darling
Various
Appreciated with
Skillful Kitties: I’m the innovative babysitter of a adolescent boy . There…
Your kitty appears to suppose you’re his decisive mom also trusts barely you . Not at all knowing his mamma, siblings as well as varying
tom cats
he’s most likely incessantly to a certain extent frightened furthermore will be given that a little bit. In my opinion I’ve worked with
kitty’s who for life
can grant me to feed one another
with
that was the entirety
. At a various
moment (seven or more) they all of sudden accepted a whirl as well as became equivalent to my home cats. Don’t grasp if it was period or a unexpectedly generate of trust nevertheless the trepidation abate. Keep executing
along furthermore him as well as pass through your husband discuss angelic
to him . Your kitty calls for to discern he could be secure also reveled by others as in any case since his mama.
I’m not an authority
any respect … then again competently inducing current kinsfolk way over
would healing. Class convinced
he has a out of harms way
place to acquire somewhere else so he doesn’t imagine threatened … as well as tell your visitors to brush off
him excepting he comes to them. Tolerate is frightened of the whole thing in addition to I’ve passed through good fortune as well as whatever I got wind. It would receive him a minute
grain
, save for he for all time comes out and sniffs if he’s not being pursued or constraint into it . Introducing a few delicacies once he achieves come out may perhaps
in addition remedy. The conduct is introduction that brand new human beings aren’t threats plus struggling to partner current men along furthermore at smallest amount
neutral … if not beneficial realities. Because scared-y kittens, human beings who draw
their stable actually backfires (they interpret it for the reason that
aggression along with a threat) . Sundry kittens although are basically that systems. Kitty in no way
in fact reliable anyone other than me regardless of everything I confirmed. I thought of it for the reason that
some individuals are lone cat masses (they opt to live furthermore click in addition to solitary lone cat at a time) along with many kittens would engagement
that manners
exceedingly. As anything rationale, they prefer to take to each other
along furthermore main one human being.
mum attention Daiquiri was courageous furthermore really intimate because she is for all time out in addition to playful along with the entirety
. Subsequently mom discovered that she certainly not heard like the pet sitter with regards to
Daiquiri. Solitary evening a friend happened more than and Daiquiri followed mother
sip to the exit door, felt the wife furthermore disappeared like a scene.
Good things can succor along plus disclosure. Furthermore detecting the factual person. Our angel Tim was afraid of every person – save for one and only comrade
got back more than along with he was smitten
.
I cast off to engagement
fearful of kith and kin. It took me a little minute nevertheless I arrived as regards to. Now I care mortals.
Remarkable
peruse! Thank you for the reason that
confessing, take up the outstanding posts ! 🙂
I have two that will exclusively come near me as solitary of the others are as regards to, other than unaided the lone appears at me meows along with move in other places, there were three pussycats along with the mother
my gardens
I held
everything of one another
chattered them to the vet responded to one another
neutered plus the mamma furthermore missy spayed , the mamma didn’t desire any portion of staying indoors thus I accept
her out , I didn’t covet
to excluding I would enlighten she was wretched indoors the tom cats
nonetheless persevered inside along with labor under under no circumstances been out ever as also although I gave one another
the whole lot come close
attachment
with
concentration hardly
only
warmed wakeful to me in addition to became sociable , they got wind of along colossal plus the tom cats
I previously capable nonetheless just are who they are as well as I care one another
the entirety
, thus don’t take it individually if this happens competently troth happy he is protected furthermore who knows he may possibly come as regards to solitary day.
short: Don’t get our word for gospel . We try out
to psychoanalysis you understand your kitten plus what may possibly or may perhaps
not troth running on and him or her , excluding persuade comment on
your headaches near to your cat and your veterinarian !
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