#finch longposts

[sewerratzz]

the moments of jimmy acting like he understands what curly was trying to say.

being crushed by responsibility. curly had to deal with actually captaining the ship, leading the crew, being someone they could safely come to, all his captain duties along with his own personal issues and feeling lost/unfulfilled, while jimmy had to what? do a few tasks? help out when his crew occasionally asked for it? and he took it all out on Anya, yelling at and berating her when he decided it was too much and it was unfair.

curly wanting his life to be something he didn’t feel the need to escape from. jimmy assuming curly wanted to run from him, not only making a scene at his birthday, but acting like it wasn’t only him that was feeling like that, saying “we’re the ones you’re trying to escape”. acting like curly’s the bad guy when they’re all being fired.

curly not wanting to be on this ladder. jimmy viewing that as curly looking down on him. the better man, staring down his nose at the weasel trying to follow him.

curly’s feet in cement. wanting to leave, but too afraid to change anything. wanting to help, too afraid of the risks. jimmy’s feet in cement. he’s forcibly impregnated Anya, and if he doesn’t do this, he’ll face repercussions for his actions.

and curly just. letting him believe he understands. of course he can’t do anything otherwise after the crash, but before it. every time this has probably happened that we haven’t even seen. he tried his best to explain, jimmy’s misunderstood but thinks he’s got it right. curly’s just too tired to try again. he never takes action, and it has catastrophic results.

[sewerratzz]

oh this is great. when i watched this movie, it didn’t effect me in the most “extreme” ways i saw people talking about. i was definitely still effected, i cried and it made me feel really understood and like i wasn’t alone. it felt more hopeful to me than it did for others i saw.

i think that could be because i’m not totally in the closet. im not out [as trans specifically] to people in real life for multiple reasons, but i’m very out online. and i spend a lot of my time online, so its not like im hiding myself and get a few hours of reprieve, it’s just, two everyday facets of my life. im not out to my family, my mom, but there’s still time for me to do it. that makes me feel better.

i think a lot of the people i saw talking about how it opened up this pit inside them and made them question so much and *hurt*, they weren’t out. some of them had de-transitioned for other people in their life, had been forced back into the closet, or just hadn’t even thought of themselves being queer yet. i think that’s why it hurt them so much more [of course, im just guessing here.]

the ending of the movie is open. it’s not a finished and shut case. We see owen finally open himself up to look inside [something he’s been so scared of doing and been avoiding the whole movie], but then he comes out of the bathroom and apologizes to everyone he passes about earlier, about himself. none of these people care or even take notice. i think a lot of people see this as owen just. opening himself up but then ignoring it. he’s still dying. he’s still *going* to die, in this world he doesn’t belong to. and while sure, that could definitely be what it is; there is still time.

progress, and especially within the journey of finding yourself, accepting yourself, and then loving yourself, is not at all linear. it’s not fast paced. the creator of the movie said it would take a whole other movie to explore owen’s journey of self love.

i can’t speak for anyone but myself, but i do think it evoked such different reactions because of people being at different points in their journey, and the route that their journeys have or are taking. some people are maddy/tara, it took time but she got out and she found herself. she loves herself. she wants to help owen/isabel do the same. some people are owen/isabel, still stifled and scared, trying to live a life that is only hurting them. personally, i’m in between, but i’m still much closer to maddy/tara’s character, and i think that’s why the movie still hurt so much, but not in the way it did for a lot of people i’ve seen.

Will update

[sewerratzz]

im watching another mouthwashing playthrough

the “SYSTEM FAILURE” message that pops up onscreen when the alarm is going off and curly’s running to the cockpit, just before the crash, i wanna talk about it.

if it is just meant to be the warning or emergency screens in the cockpit as they approach the asteroid [its not], it doesn’t make sense. because it wasn’t a system failure that caused it, it was a navigational failure.

SO i wanna talk about what it is.

this message appears on the screen like the other messages that are meant to kind of show jimmy’s state of mind. Take Responsibility. Take Care Of It. BE QUIET. those.

but these big red letters screaming

SYSTEM FAILURE

pop up when we’re playing as Curly. when he now knows what Jimmy has done and can no longer look past it.

Jimmy’s done the most insane thing, crashing the ship, as a result of Curly’s lack of action.

SYSTEM FAILURE

The system isn’t the ship. the system is capitalism, the company they work for not caring enough about the safety of its employees [especially anya, as a singular woman stranded on a spaceship with four men] to put locks in the sleeping quarters. the company not fostering a safe environment to do anything in case of situations just like what Jimmy does to Anya. they all have a group pay package. and i’m sure they will dock credits for anything they can. like if they used a cryopod not in the case of an emergency [such as the crash] like people have suggested they should have used as a holding cell for jimmy, im sure their group pay would have been docked. and this is something the crew can’t have. which is why curly thinks its best to play mediator. and why this leads to the crashing of the ship.

SYSTEM FAILURE

The system isn’t the ship, the system is the patriarchy, and how men protect other men, specifically in cases of SA, abuse, and harassment. Curly looking the other way, only seeing the big picture, when Anya tells him about the dead pixel and how its all she can see. always there, in the back of her mind. Curly telling Anya they can fix this when she tells him she’s pregnant, saying he’ll do anything and then simply not. Curly helping Jimmy get a job on the Tulpar in the first place, it being heavily implied he was in trouble on earth and running away from consequences.

Curly himself is the SYSTEM FAILURE, and he doesn’t see it until it’s far too late.

[sewerratzz]

hey just. thinking about the levels in parkour civilization

as a noob, looking up, you can barely see the sky. just dirt. covering the sky and hiding that level of civilization from you. but looking down, you can only see the void. threatened with death with one missed jump. even though there’s a prison down there, a lower level to catch you [trap you], you don’t know that.

as a pro, even having been born there, you look up, and there’s dirt above you. you can see just a bit more of the sky, you know just a bit more about the layers above you, but it’s still hidden. you look down, and you’re threatened with the fact that if you slip even once, you lose everything but your life. you lose the right to eat enough. you lose the right to sprint. you lose anyone you know. you will have to barely survive day by day.

as a master, there’s still dirt above you. there’s no other layer up there, but there could be. it’s all hidden still. you look down, you can see the pro level. you’re threatened with the loss of status. but on this layer alone, the jumps are so much harder and higher. you have to climb into the sky even to get to your house. if you try to make it easier in any way you become a pariah. you miss a water bucket, you miss a jump, you could just die.

this system benefits no one but the champion. the champion who makes the rules, who can see all layers below them, but who can also see the sky. they can’t fall. they only can be defeated, but [specifically with the Evil Champion] they cannot be defeated unless you know secrets, unless you know how they do what they do. and you cannot know that, not in a way you could use, unless you have your own connections and almost [if not literally] impossible to obtain knowledge

[sewerratzz]

Through A Glass: an analysis by finch :p

I adore this song so so much, it's absolutely one of my favourites from the whole of Pulp Musicals. Plus, I'm writing a fic for pulp fortnight, and decided to do this to easier organise my ideas for that. Also, my headcanons are probably very entwined in this so.. yeah. sorry. Please enjoy :]

Through a glass, darkly I see myself, partially With pieces left forgotten or unseen Is there a way to wipe the surface clean?

So much of who Samuel is, is his family and loved ones. They mean so much to him, and he longs for connections to people. When Samuel looks in the mirror, he sees himself, but not fully. He's not completely himself, at least not the "him" he wishes he was. Not the brave man, rushing to act. Not one to stand up for himself. He sees an obscured reflection of himself. Something is missing, and seems to him, covered up by pieces of those around him that he's tried to reflect. He wonders if there's a way to see through those pieces, and see himself fully, see the man he wants to be.

Are these my mother's eyes? My father's smile?

This is self explanatory. In his reflection, he can see so much of his parents. His eyes are so similar to his mother's, round and deep and ready to take in everything they can. His smile so much resembles his father's, that old, genuine smile that they haven't seen in so long.

Speak to me, it's been a while

Samuel sees his parents in his reflection, and he wants them to speak to him. He wants them to come back, tell him things will be okay, give him advice on what to do and how to fix his mistakes. Not expect too much of him while still encouraging him to be the best he can be because that's who his parents were and that's what they used to do when he was younger. Samuel wants his family back.

Would you trust what you see When looking through a glass at me?

Samuel wonders if other people look at him and see a person they can count on, or if they see him how he sees himself. Someone just made up of parts of other people.

Through a glass, darkly I see myself, starkly With armour that's been comfortable to wear Underneath, is anybody there?

John sees himself in a suit of armour that he's grown used to. Something he began wearing when he was younger, in his early teens, because of his father. It was uncomfortable at first, but it's grown with him and perfectly protects him now. But, it's also become an insecurity for him, because now he doesn't know how to take it off, and he can't tell who he is without it. He can't even tell if he exists without it.

Are these my father's dreams? His hopes and fears?

John has a complicated relationship with his father. He loves him, though he's also never quite been his father. Even when he was younger, William could have been more considered a mentor, teaching him about the cosmos and how to study them. John learned everything his father knew, used that knowledge in school and in his career, as well using his father's money to help him along. John doesn't quite know where his father ends and where John begins. His armour and the way it makes him feel, furthers this.

Is that what people want to hear? The apple doesn't fall far from the tree When they hold a glass to me

John wonders if people want him to be just like his father. When they look at him, do they just want to see more of the great astronomer William Herschel? Everything he does, every accomplishment feels as though it's an extension of his father, not himself. John lives in the shadow of his father's legacy, and only the satellite has made him feel any different thus far. The satellite will be his [and of course Anna's] legacy, instead of his father's. At least, he hopes.

So many years spent in the atmosphere Neglecting what happens here On the earth, in my brain With the pieces just out of the frame

Both Samuel and John have found a place in the stars and the sky. John in a much more scientific way, studying and discovering new features of the sky. Samuel in a more creative and less grounded way, using his writing as a way to put himself in the stars. They both indulge heavily in this, John becoming an astronomer, and Samuel becoming a writer, and trying to include his fiction in the paper to share how it makes him feel with others. They use it to escape, John to escape how he feels with his father, and Samuel to escape his loneliness and lack of success in making his dreams come true. They use it to escape what makes them unhappy.

I'll build my own path I'll build my way back To more than I thought I could be

John building his own path represents him deciding to not use the one his father had paved, and instead find his own way to legacy.

Samuel building his way back is representative of him wanting to become what he's always wanted to be [a writer]

High enough to finally see things clearly Through a glass, darkly We judge ourselves, harshly

Inside the satellite, sharing their feelings with each other, they both feel like they can reflect better, and more accurately. They can see how they see each other, but they can also see the flaws in how they view themselves. Samuel is not just a reflection of others, he is a loyal man that is inspired by his loved ones. He's not a Frankenstein of others' traits, he is his own person who takes and learns from those close to him. John is not his father, and he doesn't have to be. He's not just an extension of him, he is his own person who, while he did get his start from his father, has made his own discoveries and advances in his field. Looking in the mirror, they have been too harsh on themselves.

The road we take The choice we make Is the view

I have such a long way to go Whatever the distance, we'll travel together.

Samuel still has a long journey to really becoming himself and finding his confidence in himself, and of course in building his relationships and trustworthiness.

John also has the rest of his own journey in proving himself to himself, and he will be at Samuel's side, and they will help each other when they need it.

[sewerratzz]

YEAH !!! i will always take an opportunity to talk about my little guys

NOW most of my ships are rarepairs and three of them are my absolute favourites, but i have to go with one, and i’m sure this will surprise no one;

weeball time !!

Richie Lipschitz/Jason Jepson, my beloveds, my sillies. THE POTENTIAL THERE ??? this ship needs to be more popular yesterday

here is my Canon propaganda for this:

I’ve made a post months ago about this one part, but Jason clearly not wanting to bully Richie in Flick-It Ticket [im talking sections in the proshot👍].

Max asks if he should let Richie off with a warning, in that way bullies do, and Jason goes "haha, yeah :D !" I talked about this being, on the surface, a dumb jock joke, but thinking about it more, it shows Jason not wanting to bully Richie [or people in general! Later, in The Parking Lot Of Pasqualli's, when Pete says Steph invited him, Jason says "Well shit, if she's cool with the kid, maybe I'm cool with him too!", but backs off and stands by when Max yells at him.]

Both of these instances show Jason trying to go along with Max's whole 'thing' to get him to not bully them either. Steph is one of the cool kids, so he thinks that if Steph is chill with Pete, Max would be too. He's an optimistic, hopeful little guy.

[OKAY im not getting sidetracked by Jason analysis i swear.]

We remember Kyle’s little speech to Brenda in “Two Weeks Later” when he says he sometimes thinks the cheerleaders are the real show and “we’re just there to support you gals☺️”.

Jason’s little speech to Richie in “The Big Game” is like. a Direct parallel to Kyle’s, is it not?

“I’d especially like to acknowledge a vital member of this team who’s gone neglected for far too long. ..Richie, get over here!!”

“Really? You want me in the huddle?” “We don’t want you here, we need you here.”

Jason immediately putting his arm around Richie’s shoulders AND squeezing his arm, looking off with him and saying, “Whenever I feel like throwing in the towel, I just look over at the sidelines and there you are, dancing, falling all over yourself.” [he says this SO fondly btw.] “Reminds me why i love this game!”

Like I am Bad at social interaction, but I feel like that's a little over the top if he was just being nice or trying to include him. And again, it is a direct parallel to previous dialogue from a canon couple.

Also why is he getting so close to Richie [like seriously, right up against him] when, in Jason's words, he "smells like an open asshole right now." No reason for that other than gay

"No offence!" "None taken, I have overactive sweat glands!" "We understand! We support and love you!"

[I'm never not thinking about how happy Richie looks in this scene. Shaking my fist at Max for ruining that.]

Richie is the only person in canon to call Jason, Jace. He has a nickname for him !! And Jason is clearly happy with it !! Really, not that we see much of the interactions of the side characters, but all his friends as far as we know call him Jason, except Richie. And he does it twice !! When Jason tells him to shower: "You got it, Jace!" and when Max calls for him in the locker room: "Jace? Kyle? Quit fooling!"

And a parallel between them !! A beautiful, wonderful parallel which I love. Jason dies in the reprise of the song in which Richie dies. Is that not Hatchetfield Tragic Soulmatism™️ at its finest?

Nerdy Prudes Must Die to Dirty Dudes Must Die

They're doomed to die to the same melody, and if that doesn't make for soulmates, I don't know what does !! [i stole this quote from @ratsarecute4 but she was RIGHT]

now i have written a few fics for these two, but I recommend this one written by @ratsarecute4 i absolutely love it and it is so well written !!

And to leave this off, I am 100% sure that if Richie had not died and they had more time, they would’ve at least started crushing on each other, if Richie wasn’t already !! just look at his smile in The Big Game !!

In the mood to get a little wild and start some positive ship discourse, so I would like to humbly ask you all: what’s your favorite rarepair and what do you like about them?

~~~

[sewerratzz]

Gonna talk about a part of The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals that i really love

[this was brought on by me getting ready to shower and then being distracted because i put on Let It Out and Thoughts happened]

SO after the meteor hits and people are singing and dancing, Paul goes to work and asks about it. Charlotte says that her husband Sam isn’t a bad singer, but he’s always been a little flat. But this morning, he was singing in the shower and he sounded like an angel and it frightened her

So we’re told that becoming infected changes your voice. You know, you become part of the hivemind and basically an instrument for pokey’s orchestra, sounding as good as he needs you to sound. But we get no example of this.

We don’t hear any characters sing when they’re not infected (ignoring Emma in RCOC and the professor in Show Stopping Number), we have no frame of reference for voices really changing after infection.

Until Let It Out. We get the “Jekyll and Hyde” type scene from Paul.

[gonna take a long minute here to really show some appreciation for Jon’s physical and vocal acting, that man is wonderful]

Of course, we can see the difference between the paul we know, and the paul he is becoming because of infection in his body language. The dancing. Human Paul will not dance, is actively fighting against the puppet strings attached to his limbs that are getting stronger by the second, and infected!Paul is dancing happily, in a way that almost doesn’t completely fit the tone of this song.

Human Paul is terrified by what’s happening to him, his confusion and fear written on his face every time he loses control of his body and voice. Infected!Paul is revelling in human!Paul losing control, a wide smile on his face as he dances and sings.

But the vocal acting is my favourite part of Jon’s performance in this number. You can hear the difference between human and infected (and if you can’t hear it in the show, it’s much more obvious in the cast recording). Human Paul’s voice is lower, shakier, clearly showing that Paul is scared and not wanting to sing. Infected!Paul’s voice is higher, louder, more full, because he wants to sing. He’s a part of Pokey’s orchestra and it’s finally his time for a solo. Infected!Paul even takes his moments in control to say how much happier he is and how he was crazy to resist this, while human! Paul is battling for his life and saying he’d be crazy now to give in, and his final words are “I don’t like musicals!”

Jon does perfectly acting as Paul fighting against two different versions of himself and i love him. Big round of applause for Jon Matteson👏👏👏

And then of course in inevitable, any trace of human Paul is gone from his voice. He is completely, 100% infected now. Part of the hivemind. Not coming back. The happiness with which he sings and dances, all the while at some moments being hostile towards Emma as she tries to get away and he tries to infect her too. It’s finally his time to shine, he doesn’t get to sing or dance in almost the whole show, he gets one full song to show his prowess and by Pokotho, he is gonna show it !!

i love these numbers sm, there’s a reason they’re two of my favourites in the show

[sewerratzz]

heya everyone !! thought i should make an intro post, so here it is !

i’m finch, my pronouns are he/she/fae/faer, and i’m 18 :p

my ao3 is sewer-ratz

i now officially have tags so here’s a little guide:p

#finch fics:] [links to my fics]

#finch arts !! [my art ^^]

#finch lyrics [i post lyrics i like !! all falsettos rn<3]

#finch reacts [my liveblogging of things, currently genloss founders cut, in trousers & i saw the tv glow]

#finch longposts [my analyses & mini essays ^^]

~woo more below the cut~

i like all starkid musicals, little shop of horrors, ride the cyclone, & many more

i also like many movies & shows so that’s cool !! a couple i adore specifically are pacific rim & doctor who so thats cool

i <3 my moots !! & all my friends at Blinky’s Rewatch Party :]

i have a few sideblogs :p

@grimysewerrat is my always sunny blog !!

i have many ships (most rarepairs) & i am always thinking of them

weeball, batthews, & hollowebby my beloveds <33

feel free to talk to me/ask me questions abt stuff :]